#she's not a good singer OR songwriter. the two things she's supposed to do well. she's just a good businesswoman | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

cosettepontmercys · 5 months

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Hey! Sorry I didn't reply..it was my brother's bday the other day and I was a little tipsy. Omg I just realized I also shorten his name to To and sometimes we will repeat it like To To to get him to pay attention or look. but it still sounds different than Toto if that makes sense. I can't believe I just noticed that lol. So I guess we have similar dog names too which is such a coincidence. That's cool..what kinda things do you have planned? I don't know much about it. Have you been before?

Ya it's different with Taylor since I did grow up with her since the beginning and she always seemed pretty normal girl with her lyrics from debut and I felt so connected to her as a shy weird girl who didn't have a lot of friends. So that's a lot different than other artists to me..but I have been following Paramore early on too. I think it might be cuz I know more about Taylors life and her as a person, and did grow up with her. But I have had a similar experience with a few other artists later in my life where the music found me at the right time when I needed it. That happened with Soccer Mommy and the band Best Coast..if you like singer songwriters you might enjoy her music. She says things in a more simple way than Taylor but I find it so relatable. Another one is The Smiths..their music means so much to me. My favorite concert was Eras and Rep..haha. next would be twenty one pilots/TOP..I have seen them probably 5 or 6 times now and they always put on a great show! I saw Paramore in 2015 and was so bummed I couldn't make their recent tour. Wow that's a lot! Before eras, I can't remember the last concert I went to. Which one has been your favorite? And which eras show was your favorite?

I watched a bootleg of &Juliet before but I can't really remember it! I think I might have been drinking during it and had it on in the background. I like it well enough but it reminds me too much of Moulin Rouge and I just prefer that a lot more. I think it's overall a pretty fun show though, but that's all. I like Six in a similar way too but I totally get why people love it. Aww I hope you can..it really does seem like seeing it live could make a big difference. Moulin Rouge the movie will always be better to me than the musical though. I've also really been into La La Land again recently. Have you ever seen the Beatles jukebox musical Across the Universe? That's another favorite of mine and would totally recommend! I wanted to ask if you had watched it. No I haven't..but folk style Sondheim seems interesting and just my style..I'll check it out for sure. Also..did you see the new Mean Girls trailer? What did you think? They did not make it seem like a musical though so I don't really have a strong opinion of it yet. It didn't feel like the original either so idk.

I really hope to watch the show at some point. I just have not been watching TV lately but I really want to. I've seen enough gifs on here to know it's good. I can't believe that's where Paul and Daisy's careers started..I feel like I see Paul everywhere now but I'm not even sure if I actually saw one of his movies yet. I did watch Daisy in the Crawdads movie and thought it was okay. I saw two episodes of CWF and was supposed to watch them at the same time to see what my sister thought lol..but that's not even on Hulu anymore so I'll never watch it now, but will watch Normal People. I've heard mixed things of Beautiful World..the bit I read felt different from the other two in a way to me. I planned on reading them all next to each other..and I think I read Normal People and CWF at the same time actually. I finished Normal people quickly and had to work to finish CWF. I did not understand or connect to the relationship or characters as much in that one so that does make me curious about Beautiful World. I think I have to be in a specific mood for it though.

Oh yes that happens to me with books all the time too, as you know. It's like..i tell myself if I start it, that makes me feel like I will definitely go back to it but sometimes that doesn't happen, and it's not even really because of the book. I really hope it doesn't happen with Night Circus though..but i might not get back to it for a month, so don't worry. I have heard of that book I think? but don't know what it's about. I honestly don't really read funny books I don't think but I guess it seems like you're enjoying it which is good! I totally will keep you updated if I read any more of it.

It's so good! That's a perfect way to describe it and I'm sure it will fit right into the movie. Oh is it like a six degrees of separation thing with Rachel..haha that's still awesome though!

Speaking of vinyls, my 1989 pink vinyl came yesterday and I really love the cover every time I look at it. It really makes me think about how the vault tracks go with the beach theme as well. I don't think my rankings have changed actually, but more like my opinion of the vault as a whole. Like I think maybe these are the best so far as a group..they go well together but Red has more of my absolute favorites. Slut is still my favorite and it's so dreamy..I loved the new acoustic version as well. Then Say Don't Go, Suburban Legends and Now we Don't Talk. Unpopular opinion..is it over now is still in last for me but I truly love every song a lot more now! Something I was thinking and talking to my sister about is how Taylor still writes great love songs and I feel like I don't see it a lot with all these newer singer songwriters as much. I've always loved Taylors lyrics and songs about being a hopeless romantic, and I think Slut falls into that category as well. I know she compared it to Blank Space but it also reminds me of Wildest Dreams. Although it could be just the feeling of the song too, similar to Snow on the Beach or even Paris. I also see Suburban Legends as a mix of Timeless, Gold Rush and maybe a bit of Mastermind in both lyrics and sounds. Aww that's so exciting..I hope she had a great time! I loved the new pink outfits so much and just seeing her perform again makes me so happy..and the surprise songs. I will make a guess for surprise songs right now for tonight. I'm thinking something from Rep for the anniversary..so I'll pick Dancing with our hands tied guitar and Say Don't Go..since I imagine she will want to sing a new vault song. It's the first thing I thought of but I also think that would be a great pairing..what about you? Do you have any guesses?

Oh I don't really use my laptop anymore since it's so slow but I still can try it on my phone. I glanced at the rules and was kinda confused. I'll have to see what my sister thinks about it cuz I might need help.

I've never seen Jasper In deadland and had no idea it was similar. That makes it interesting to me. Come From Away is pretty different cuz there's less songs and more dialogue..plus the style of music is just way different lol but like Great Comet comparison would make more sense with Hadestown. That's a sweet memory to have..it still gives me chills sometimes and I remember when I first saw the Tony performance too.

I love talking to you but I think it might help me to send shorter anons from time to time and I'm sorry if I talk too much. Sometimes responding to your messages overwhelms me and I feel bad if I don't reply right away. I think I will be busy and stressed until the middle of January at this point and some days I won't have as much energy to give you a full response. I can still talk to you about reading updates and Taylors tour, such as guessing surprise songs each day or overall just checking in of course. I just feel like some convos go in circles at this point so don't feel like you have to respond to everything. I feel like I just talk to you the same way I just ramble stuff to my sister at this point lol. I try really hard to keep things interesting but sometimes it's hard cuz I'm actually boring and never doing anything. It's not you at all..so please don't take it that way! I hope you have an amazing trip!!! 🩷🩷🩷

hi friend this is so so late and i am terribly sorry </3 i have been down with the plague unfortunately :( i got sick coming home from boston and i am still feeling ... quite ill. i hope you've been doing well!

how was your brother's birthday? did y'all have fun? what's your drink of choice? and i've been to boston once before! i mostly just hung out with one of my best friends — i got to meet some turkeys (which i was super excited about), we went shopping, went to a museum, a musical and a concert! so very, very fun! and very serendipitous because i ran into some other friends who live in boston at the museum! it was a very short trip, but i had a lot of fun and my immune system is terrible so i am now paying the price, but that's okay! hopefully i'll feel better soon.

i don't know if i've said this to you before, so forgive me if i have, but i got introduced to taylor through this one girl in my 6th grade art class — i'd just moved to the states, and she was like "do you like taylor swift" and i was like "idk who that is" and she was like "you have to listen to her" so i went home and looked her up on youtube and became obsessed! i had no friends (i was nine and in 6th grade and everyone was two years older than me) but i had taylor and her music, and so that's a big part of why her earlier stuff means so much to me! i think it's really easy to feel ... more connected (?) to taylor because her work is so personal, even when it's not autobiographical!

i really do love singer songwriters — and will have to check them out! i really love our conversations because i get introduced to so many new artists that i wouldn't have listened to on my own! i almost feel like we should do a little like playlist exchange (doesn't have to be a formal playlist), like a collection of like a few songs that we want the other person to listen to! my favorite is also eras — i'm tempted to say night 2 because i got to hear one of my all time favorite songs (tied together with a smile) but night 1 was really, really special too because i got to see it with two of my closest friends and the vibes were just so immaculate! i think we were all a lot more tired night 2 (and rushed, since we had to run from the gracie acoustic set) and so it was a little more hectic! i don't know if i told you but i ended up getting tickets for vancouver, so i'm going to be able to take my mom and my friend from high school (who i was originally going to do round 3 of eras with) 🥺 i'm really really excited because i will know more of what to expect, and i get to see her with my mom who also really loves taylor (her favorite era is fearless and she was really disappointed the movie did not have the green dress — she kept asking me "wheres the green dress? when does the green dress show up" haha). but i think seeing maisie and sabrina were also perfect? like i have just been very fortunate to have some incredibly good concert experiences this year!

i have not seen across the universe, but one of my friends loves it and it's been on my watchlist forever! one day i'll get around to it! i don't love the mean girls trailer for the same reason — it doesn't feel like the musical at all (or a musical, in general), but i'm trying to keep an open mind! i probably won't see it in cinemas but we'll see!! speaking of musicals, did you see that american psycho immersive is happening in 2025? i lost my mind when i found out! i was half asleep and my friend texted me and woke me up and i was like immediately wide awake. i'm soooo excited for it. i'm going to try to plan a trip out in 2025!

i brought convo with friends with me to boston, and didn't even touch it once haha. which is sometimes the case when i bring books on vacation! i also packed up my ipad with arcs and read one page of one and then put it down. sometimes i'll read like seven books on vacation and then sometimes i'll read 0. it's just how things are!

cleo & frank is a very ... wild book. i do not know if i would recommend it (i'm about halfway in) but it's definitely keeping my interest in an entertaining way. i've been reading for about 30 minutes before "bed" now, so hopefully i can finish it before the end of the month! i think november is going to be a very chill reading month; i've only read 3 books and i don't see myself reading many more just based on how ill i've been feeling. which is okay! i was just hoping to be more on top of things (arcs) this month, but that's fine, there's always next month. i think i'm going to wait to touch night circus till i'm feeling better :( and try to focus on that — and finishing up my les mis annotations/reread in december, then maybe jump into starless sea in january! we'll see though!

isn't the pink 1989 vinyl so pretty? i'm obsessed with it! i haven't listened to it yet, but i keep looking at it! i also preordered the new bleachers album on vinyl yesterday, i think the colors on this one are so pretty! i loveeeed the acoustic of slut; i haven't listened to it a whole lot but i really liked it when i listened to it! maybe i will spin 1989 today while at work for you 🤍 i haven't really been listening to vinyls much lately (i fall into moods) but i was listening to in the end it always does by the japanese house (i have the pink vinyl for that too!) the other night! i also bought the new sabrina carpenter christmas ep fruitcake on vinyl, so i'm excited for that to come! and i have some vinyls coming in from urban outfitters' 7" singles day — i think they're coming here today, actually!

and you are so right! i love her softer love songs, like saccharine sweet ones, and it's funny because one of my best friends does not like those ones at all! we very much compliment each other in that way; she's a rep girlie and i am very much not a rep girlie haha. speaking of rep, it looks like you hit the nail on the head with predicting DWOHT soon! do you think we're going to get a rep announcement this week? a lot of my friends are rep girlies, so for their sake i hope so but i also wish taylor would take a break!

i made a post about this when i saw your ask come in, but i want you to know there's never any pressure to reply immediately, or to send a long lengthy ask! i just love chatting with you, no matter what! thinking of you this holiday season (if you celebrate?) and hope things are going okay 🤍 you are not boring at all! and we are friends! take care of yourself friend!!

#post: answered #🩷 anon

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longminder · 2 years

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No one alicia keys

The Conversation didn’t end without pushing for some more personal details from Keys. “…we’re beautiful because of how your mind works and you’re beautiful because you have this gorgeous heart and that comes from way more than fitting you in a size two dress.” Either way, the R&B record producer felt that beauty didn’t have much to do with outward appearances. She even went on to add that she found larger, thicker women to be even more beautiful. Contrary to what Hollywood might say about a woman’s body image, Keys felt that women are “gorgeous no matter what size” they are. In addition to motherhood, she touched on the topic of body image. “…When I went it was such an uplifting, eye opening, historic, powerful, and re-generative experience that I hold a very fond place for Egypt.” “Well, Egypt was a really big important trip for me in my life,” Keys said as she referenced her vacation to Egypt alone. As the interview continued she discussed why she picked the unusual name for her first child. Of course, Keys was more than happy to deal with the pains of breastfeeding if it was in the best interest of her now 18-month-old son, Egypt. Keys admitted that she felt a bit silly for complaining about breast feeding pains when she was able to make it through hours and hours of natural child birth. I remember I was in bed and I couldn’t move because it hurts and there is no way around it.” “The whole engorgement thing, no one mentioned that part. “I took this whole class too, which I thought was really good because I think a lot of people think you’re just supposed to have this natural instinct that’s supposed to happen out of thin air,” said Keys, but even after the class there was one secret behind breast feeding that she would have to discover the hard way. Keys revealed that although she loved breastfeeding, there were certainly some things that nobody bothered to warn her about. Perhaps this is what made the very private singer-songwriter open up about some rather personal topics. The one-on-one private atmosphere that The Conversation offers often makes guests feel a little more at home during their interviews. The mother of one son even revealed the things that nobody told her about breastfeeding. The usually private Keys opened up on an episode of the new Lifetime talk-show series, The Conversation. Alicia Keys sat down with Amanda de Cadenet just a few days before Mother’s Day to talk about body image, motherhood and even sex.

#No one alicia keys

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tpwkay · 3 years

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Medicine (h.s.)

You’re finally given permission to cover the song you’ve wanted to perform for years and a special surprise during your performance sweeps you off of your feet.

Word count: 11.5k

Rating/warnings: NSFW - A lot of this is plot but there is smut as well. Contains explicit language and consensual sex acts between a man and woman. This is a story written in the 2nd person (“self insert"). This isn’t written to be exclusionary, it’s just my preferred style! Author’s note can be found at the end!

"Ladies and gentlemen, I cannot thank you enough for coming out tonight to listen to me and the band. We've got a couple more songs coming up for you but I just wanted to take a minute to tell y'all how much we appreciate you." You gesture to yourself and the band behind you as the lights on stage come up a bit. "We wouldn't be where we are without your support. From the bottom of our hearts, thank you!"

The crowd cheers and you can't help but experience an insurmountable feeling of joy. It never gets old. You'd been in the spotlight for a few years now, already at the end of touring your second album, though the size and scope of venues this time around was much, much larger. There was nothing that compared to being able to sing your own songs and have a crowd of thousands scream them right back at you.

Being an up-and-coming singer and songwriter in the genre of country music hadn't been easy. Girls your type had been a dime a dozen, hoards of Taylor Swift-wannabes covering "Teardrops on My Guitar" during open mic night. You held nothing against them; there was a path to success for everyone, but yours had been, well, different.

It was a karaoke cover of Brooks & Dunn's "Boot Scootin' Boogie", a song that you'd been singing since you were a toddler, that had gotten you noticed by a recording artist one night while out with your girlfriends, which led you to where you stand now, performing in front of thousands. You were liked for the range of your voice, with it's easy easy transitions from the sounds of pop to country and rock, in addition to the way you performed, and your take-no-shit attitude towards the entirety of the industry. People liked that you were forward and left nothing on the table, though you had to admit that it was mostly an act, a means of coping with the pressure of working your way to the top.

///

"It's refreshing!" Jax, your manager, had shouted one day, arms flailing as you had argued that maybe your attitude was going to get you into trouble one of these days.

"Aren't you, as, you know, my manager, supposed to be the one keeps me in line?"

"You aren't out doing coke, killing anyone, public indecency and all that," he had shrugged. "Far as I'm concerned, you are in line. People talk about you because of your attitude. They like it! They like you. Why is that so hard for you to accept sometimes?"

"Maybe I just haven't been caught doing those things," you grinned, effectively dodging his question. Fame hadn't helped break down the walls that you'd long ago built around yourself. If anything, you had done some reinforcing, built a moat even, in an effort to ensure that you protected yourself from getting too close to anyone that would only end up using you in the end. You had seen the way people in life had been used, and what it ultimately led them to, and you had promised yourself long ago that even if it meant being known as the Boot Scootin' Bitch, you would protect yourself and your heart at all costs.

"Your momma would tan your hide for much less than any of those, you know. Hell, you should be more afraid of her than you are of me or anyone else… 'cept maybe God."

///

You shake your head, working the memories free from your mind as you grab a bottle of water from the platform on which the drum set rests.

There's one more song of yours to sing before you performed a new cover, the one you had been looking forward to for months. Although you'd gotten permission to perform it not long into the start of your tour, the set list had been rehearsed already and every other detail ironed out around it. You'd convinced Jax and the crew to let you slot it into the last concert of the tour, Austin, Texas. These folks knew their music and for some reason, they liked you so you were thrilled to be able to share something new with the crowd that had welcomed you to their city with open arms.

You grab your guitar off its stand and slide the strap over your shoulders, adjusting it as you step forwards to the mic stand. A shimmering blue shirt catches your eye in the crowd and you do a double take because surely it can't be Harry because he's—

And it's not him, of course, though the fashion of the gentleman in the pit area would surely catch his eye as well as it's right up his alley. It's not him - it can't be him - because you know exactly where he is right now and it's not in the pit of your Austin performance.

A grin stretches over your face as you think of him. You strum the first chord of the first song you'd ever written about him, although there had been many more since. He probably knew this one was about him, having come just after your first meeting.

///

A friend of yours was good friends with Kacey, who had been the guest artist that night. Her name had been added to the VIP list and in the summer of 2018, just as you were hitting your own stride in your career, you tagged along with her to Harry Styles' live tour performance in your hometown of Nashville.

If you were being honest, prior to his concert, you hadn't heard much of his solo work, apart from the various huge hits like his Kiwi or Watermelon Sugar and a few other ballads. You liked his sound, seemingly influenced heavily by rock stars of days past, but you'd had other influences to worry about in your own side of the industry.

Sure, he had country music connections through the likes of Kacey Musgraves and Cam, and legends like Stevie Nicks, but his pop and soft rock style was pretty far removed from most country playlists that you yourself had graced. Your genres just didn't cross paths and the two of you seemingly operated in different realms of the music industry, topping your own charts and breaking your own peer's records.

Of course, you hadn't been completely oblivious to The Harry Styles. One Direction had been too big of a deal to ignore and you'd often found yourself bopping along to their old hits, singing along as they played amongst the other nostalgic pop hits to which you listened.

The concert had been in June, a hot sunny day followed by a perfect breezy evening. Downtown Nashville was always busy, but that night the city seemed to buzz, bright with music and life. After meeting for drinks at Acme on the River, you allowed yourself to luxuriate in getting lost in the crowd that milled about on Broadway. It was a surprising thing to not be recognized in your hometown, but you weren't one to complain about it. It was one reason that you value your time in Nashville over other music-centric cities like Los Angeles - it seemed that people here respected the private lives of musicians. There was an odd fan here and there, but you'd lived a majority of your "famous" life in Nashville in relative peace.

You were early to the venue, your friend having wanted to have a chance to see Kacey backstage. You were excited to finally meet the star - though you'd been around the block of fame a bit already, there would always be people that you never had an opportunity to meet in passing. You had been greeted at will call and had been led backstage.

The arena was alive with excitement. At that point, you yourself had never toured a venue that large, so the experience of being backstage and seeing the operations first hand were thrilling and a bit overwhelming. In her dressing room, Kacey pulled you straight into a hug, gushing about how excited she was to watch your career take off. She insisted on sharing her personal cell phone number with you, urging you to call her to get together on a collaboration. You were in shock leaving her room, blown away by her kindness and the way the music industry worked in the most bizarre of ways, when you turned a corner and ran smack into a tall, solid, smiling Harry Styles. His arms had come out quickly to steady you on your heels boots.

"Fuck," you swore, shaking your head at your clumsiness. "I am so sorry. What a great way to introduce myself."

He laughed and the sound flowed through you, warm and sweet like a cup of tea with honey. "Y'alright?" His eyes looked you over, and you couldn't help but notice the way they lingered.

Your cheeks blushed and a wave of embarrassment washed over you. "I'm the one that should be asking you that. I don't think your adoring fans would be very happy if I took you out with a textbook tackle right before you're due to go on stage." You took a moment to give him the same appreciative glance he had already given you, admiring the way his deep blue custom-beaded suit jacket fell open to reveal a black dress shirt, unbuttoned halfway down his chest.

"Ah, 'm fine. Lil' thing like you couldn't do too much damage to me, even in those heels. Don't think they'd be very happy though," he said, nodding his head in acknowledgement of the already-rowdy crowd while offering his hand. "I'm Harry."

You laughed as you introduced yourself, shaking his hand.

"I've heard that name before, but I'm sorry to say that I don't recognize you. You don't seem like one that's easy to forget."

"I sing, write music," you shrugged, not sure how to explain to a superstar that you were on the way up, yet still somewhere much farther down the fame totem pole than him. "Country, mostly. Not sure if that's on your radar."

"The new stuff's not, but I may have to change that." He was tapped by one of the event producers, needed for another pre-show procedure. "Where will you be tonight?"

"To your right, in the pit."

He smiled and you had almost immediately fallen in love with the crinkles that appeared under the corners of his eyes. "I'll look out for you. It was wonderful meeting you. Oh, shit, wait, just remembered— may I?" he gestured for the phone that was in your hand and you unlocked it before passing it to him.

You watched as he dialed a number and put the phone to his ear. He paused for a moment before he grinned. "Hi Harry, it's you from before the show. This is a message to remind you to text this number and ask the owner of it out on a date. She's the one with the beautiful smile and great tackling skills. You won"t have forgotten her. 'Kay, bye!"

You laughed at an almost embarrassing volume, blown away by his cheek.

"Why not ask 'her' out now?" you pondered to him as he handed the phone back.

"What, and risk getting shot down? Wouldn't want to be sad and disappointed through my whole show, now would I?"

"It would make the ballads a bit more emotional," you had reasoned with a grin.

"Ouch! They're already filled with emotion, love. You'll see, I'll sing 'em right to you if I have to. Gotta run, thank you for letting me use your phone, that was a very important message!"

You laughed again as he took off. "Harry!" you had shouted to get his attention in the busy hall. He turned quickly, a small smile on his face. "She definitely won't say no, but you can wait until later to ask if you want to."

His grin stretched wider and he'd pumped a fist in the air before turning and jogging down the hallway.

You liked to joke with anyone who knew the story that your life had changed that day all because you met Kacey. Which wasn't a complete lie - it had been her dressing room you'd come out of before slamming into Harry in the hallway.

///

Singing the last lines of one of your songs, your stomach began to flutter in a bit of nervousness and a lot of excitement. Performing the next cover was something you had been looking forward to for months, and the moment that you got to share it with your fans was finally here.

You retreat from the mic stand to pass your guitar off to a stagehand, taking another sip of water to settle yourself.

"Doing alright?" Wyatt, your drummer, shouts over the pounding bass drum and you give him a thumbs up before turning back to face the crowd.

"I've got one more cover to play for y'all tonight," you say, grasping the mic stand to keep your hands from shaking. "I've been working on getting permission to play this one for quite awhile now. I fell in love with it the first time I heard it played and now here I am, performing it for you all. It's an unreleased piece by a very, very good friend of mine, but his performances of it are all over the internet so some of you may know the words. This song is called Medicine."

The song starts out with a steady bass line and the rhythm centers you a bit, steadying any nerves that still linger. The intro gives you a minute to shake out your shoulders and get comfortable at the mic stand once more like Harry does at each performance. You catch yourself having fun mimicking him and feel thankful that you're able to perform one of your favorite songs of his. When the bass drops in pitch and the electric guitar riffs, you slide in close to the mic stand.

"Here to take my medicine, take my medicine," you sang the opening lines, already settling into the sexy rock sound of the song you and the band had rehearsed relentlessly over the last few weeks. No, the genre wasn't one you normally dabbled in, but part of the fun of performing was taking chances, risks. You had to admit, you liked the sound a lot. It tempted you to branch out a bit more on your upcoming album.

The opening lines of the first verse throw you back into thoughts of meeting Harry that first night. You hadn't imagined what would follow the concert, let alone have the foresight to see it bringing you to this very moment in time.

///

You had been standing outside the arena after the concert, ears buzzing and heart thumping still from the incredible show Harry had put on. As soon as he disappeared from the backstage hall earlier, you had immediately saved his number to your phone, still in disbelief over the night's events.

Your heart had soared when your phone began to vibrate, not in a text message but in a voice call. Harry's name appeared on the screen and your friend had nudged you, clearly approving of the night's turn of events.

"Harry," you answered, ready to praise him halfway to Sunday on his performance.

"Let me take you out," he interrupted you. "Right now. Please? Anywhere you want to go."

You laughed and paused. "Yeah, okay. I might know of a place."

There was a lot of shuffling on his end before his voice came back on the line. "Might've had to do another fist pump."

"Told you she wouldn't say no."

"Where are you?" You heard the smile in his voice, already familiar with it.

"Demonbreun and John Lewis, headed towards the park."

"Give me 10, I'll pick you up." He paused. "Be careful, okay?"

"I'll stick with the hoards of your fans milling about, maybe ask some of them for the hot gossip on you while I wait."

"Don't believe anything they say," he said, and you could tell he was still smiling as he hung up.

He and his driver arrived shortly after, Harry's hair damp and covered with a baseball cap, dressed down in black pants and a simple loose white shirt, tattoos peeking out everywhere you looked. He exited the car and opened the back door for you, helping you balance as you stepped up into the large Suburban.

"We'll go to Pecker's," you said to his driver, laughing as Harry snorted next to you. "Shut up, it's just a bar. Take a right up here onto 24 and it'll take us all the way to Fairfield. It'll be on the right."

He looked at you and smiled before reaching out to hold your hand in the middle seat between you.

Taking Harry to Pecker's had just felt right. It was where you'd been discovered, where all of your adventures had started, and you weren't sure why but you wanted to share that small part of you with him after watching him up on stage that night.

"Won't people recognize you? I looked you up before the show, you're apparently a pretty big deal around here." He had asked, smirking, sipping on the locally-brewed beer that Clint, the regular bartender, was serving that night.

"Locals are pretty good about not interrupting our normal lives. Pecker's isn't as well known to tourists either, so it's a good hideout. This is where a lot of producers, executives and all the other professionals come to unwind." You ignored his comment on your fame and had taken a sip of your margarita instead. "Unless, of course, there's a drag show scheduled, then it's a bit of a madhouse."

Harry laughs into his drink and you grin. "So," he started after a pause, twiddling with the rings on his right hand. "What'd you think?"

"It was incredible," you said without hesitation. "Truly one of the best live shows I've seen in a long time, country acts included. You've got such a magnetism about you that people can't help but want to watch." You blushed a bit, alcohol and the quick comfort of him loosening your lips. "The whole water spraying trick was hot," you admit, making him blush. "And don't tell Stevie, but I think I might prefer your version of The Chain."

"Sacrilege! That's some incredibly high praise," he said, a small smile teasing at the corners of his mouth.

"Earned and deserved," you said, tilting your glass to his. "Honestly, Harry, you're an incredible musician. There aren't many out there that have the whole package like that."

"What about you? You seem like the whole package."

"I don't know if I'd say that. If you looked me up, you've likely seen what they say about me. 'My attitude won't get me far' and all. But I don't think it's my attitude, so much as it is my willingness to take the risks that others won't. I'm not out here to make music that's just there to be sold. Hell, I couldn't care less about the money. All I want is to create music that makes me feel fulfilled, and I think that honesty scares them." You twirled your finger in the condensation of the glass in front of you. You glanced up to his face finding his eyes already on yours, holding your gaze steadily. "It doesn't scare you, does it?"

"It's the most refreshing thing I've heard in a while. Not many people in the industry are fearless in the face of failure like that."

"I'm definitely not fearless; I just refuse to change who I am to make a buck."

"Who are you then?" Harry had asked, and telling him your story was easy. You couldn't understand how it was so natural, opening up to a stranger, but as the conversation wore on, you realized how similar you and Harry were in terms of the way you conducted your professional lives and that was without apology.

And you also realized, as the evening continued and you and Harry crept your bar stools closer and closer to one another, feet and knees bumping, his fingers tracing the ridges of your knuckles as you shared life stories like long lost friends, that you didn't want it to end.

///

"He's acting like a gentleman," you continue, changing up the lyrics slightly as you finish the first verse. The line always made you smile and you let yourself briefly flash back into your reminiscing about the night you'd met Harry, and how, even though he had acted gentlemanly upon dropping you off for the evening, you wanted to be anything but a gentlewoman.

///

After enjoying drinks late into the evening at Pecker's, Harry had insisted on having his driver take you home rather than allowing you to call an Uber.

"Such a gentleman," you commented as he opened the car door for you once again.

"Maybe my gentlemanly actions have motives," he said, sliding his hand along your lower back as you step past him and into the car. Your grin matched his smirk as he shut the door and you decided that he'd been right - not calling an Uber was the right thing to do.

The car ride back to your apartment building was too quick and before you knew it, he was at your door again, offering a hand for you to hold for balance as you exited the car. Neither of you let go as you walked through the lobby towards the elevators.

"You're uh— You're welcome to come up, if you'd like," you said, suddenly shy but not wanting to chicken out on asking for what you wanted, asking for some continuation of this sweet but likely brief meeting between you two. "For a drink, I mean, or to keep chatting, you know."

Harry smiled and glanced around the empty lobby. His hand in yours smoothed up the length of your arm, over your shoulder, and came to rest at your jaw. "I'd love to, believe me. You have no idea how much I want to." He leaned towards you, pressing a quick kiss to your forehead and your skin burned at the contact of his lips. "But I want to do this the right way. Don't want you to get the wrong idea of me."

"What if I want the wrong idea of you?"

He laughed, the sound open and honest and it had given you hope. "You called me a gentleman earlier and I have to admit that I liked it, coming from you. Would like to keep up the facade that I am, even if it's just for a bit." His face searched yours, each of you trying to read the thoughts that were flying through one another's minds. "You have beautiful lips," he whispered suddenly, his accent thicker than it had been all night.

Your mouth quirked into a smile, unable to do anything but preen at his compliment. "You do too," you replied, just as softly.

"Can I kiss you?"

"Please, yes." Before the words had settled he was kissing you, slowly and with too much care, like you would break if he wasn't gentle enough. It was over much too quick but you knew you would remember every moment of it for the rest of your life.

"Christ, I'd wanted to do that all night." His thumb smoothed over your cheekbone, smiling when you leaned into the touch. He glanced up as the elevator doors swung open and gently nudged you towards them. "Thank you, truly, for a wonderful evening. I promise to give you a call soon."

"I'll send Kacey after you if you don't!" you laughed, stepping into the lift.

"Good night darling." He winked and the doors slid shut, leaving you alone with your thoughts and the delicious ghost of his lips on yours.

///

"Give me that adrenaline, that adrenaline, think I'm gonna stick with you," you finish the first verse as Ryann rips through the chords on her guitar. You loved that the song built slowly, and even though that meant a quieter beginning, it promised an explosive end.

Though the crowd had been hesitant at first, you can see that the first few rows of them are nodding along, countless phones out recording the performance. You know that somewhere out there at your request is a member of your press team, professionally filming the cover. You may only be doing it once, but you were determined to make sure you would never forget it.

///

You had enough time at home to check some of your social media accounts, shower and get comfortable in bed before your phone rang again. For the second time that day, your heart soared seeing Harry's name light up your screen.

"If you're going to say that you're downstairs because you've reconsidered my offer for that nightcap, I'll need a few moments to prepare as I'm currently in my pajamas," you said as a greeting and you were met with his warm laughter once again.

"No, no, I had to go back to the arena for a bit anyways, pack up and all of that," he said, still chuckling. "I just— I wanted to make sure you weren't offended by me declining your offer. Because I wanted to— I didn't want the night to end there. There's something about you that's… Transfixing. And I don't want to ruin that and make you think you're just a fling."

"That's quite a compliment," you said, a bit awed by his words.

"What was it you said earlier, "earned and deserved", yeah?" He said, quoting your toast to him at the bar, making you grin. "I want you to be more than that. I'd like to get to know you, the gentlemanly way."

"Okay. Will we have a chaperone at our next date then?" He laughed but didn't correct your referral to that evening as a date. You had snuggled a bit deeper into the sheets, still disbelieving that all of this had been the result of being dragged along to a concert.

"No chaperones," he chuckled, "but yes, I do want to take you out again, if you'd let me."

"Hmm," you jokingly pondered aloud, as if answering with anything other than a resounding "yes" was on your mind. "I suppose I could fit something into my schedule."

"I hope that's a yes."

"Of course it's a yes! I didn't want the night to end either. And don't you dare say that you just did another fist pump," you had laughed, hearing the familiar shuffling of the phone on his end of the line.

"Me? Never!"

"You're adorable," you had said, a smile stuck on your face.

"And you're beautiful. Two can play this game."

There had been a comforting silence between you for a moment before you had spoken up again. "Harry?"

"Yeah, love?"

You had blushed at the pet name but loved the way it sounded being directed your way. "Thank you," you had whispered.

"Should be me thanking you. Sleep well sweetheart." You'd fallen asleep with your phone in hand, hopeful that you wouldn't wake up the next morning to realize it had all been a dream.

///

It hadn't been a dream, and here you were, nearly two years later, performing one of the songs that Harry himself had sung the night that you'd begun falling for him.

The second verse continued quickly and you let the lyrics wash over you as you sang, loving the way the rock energy of the song sounded with a bit of your band's country influence.

"Here to take my medicine, take my medicine, rest it on your fingertips," you sang, holding your pointer finger in the air much like Harry did every time he performed the song before bringing it to your lips as you sang the next line. "Up to your mouth, feeling it out, feeling it out."

///

Beginning to date Harry - properly date him too, not just make FaceTime calls to one another from across the world and sending texts back and forth until the wee hours of the morning thanks to the differences in time zones, sharing everything and more with one another as best you could digitally - had been the most exhilarating experience of your life, and you had performed in front of sold out crowds and accepted awards on live television. His tour was due to stretch on for almost another month throughout North America and the next time you saw him was when you'd been invited as Harry's guest to his show in Chicago just a few weeks after you'd met.

While he had put on an incredible show for the United Center, there had been moments that felt like he was performing just for you, glancing over to where you stood in the Friends and Family area, meeting your eyes and grinning. By that point, you could sing along to every song of his and you knew he loved it, loved watching you dance along to the music that he had created and was performing.

In a moment where you were thankful for the differences between the genres in which you two performed, you hadn't been recognized at all by his fans. You'd both talked about wanting to keep things quiet as you got to know one another, and you hadn't wanted a relationship with him, an already incredibly famous artist, to somehow influence the trajectory of yours. While it had been easy when you were apart, being together without seemingly being together was difficult. Especially in that moment, when all you wanted to do was curl up into him and soak in the post-show bliss with him. Instead, you sat on the couch with him, a cushion apart from one another, holding his hand tightly while you chatted about the concert.

"Someone is gonna notice that you looked to my side of the pit constantly all night," you said and he grinned guiltily.

"I like knowing you're in the crowd," he shrugged. "Besides," he scooted closer and threw his arm around you before dragging you in close, "you look incredible, how could I not want to stare at you all night?"

"Anyone could walk in," you pointed out, watching as his eyes followed your lips.

"Just want a little taste," he said, moving in closer, "Haven't I earned a kiss from my girlfriend after all of that work up on stage?"

Your eyebrows raised in surprise as you looked at him and he seemingly realized his slip-up.

"I mean— What I meant was— Shit," he scrubbed a hand over his face but you could tell he was hiding a grin. "Wasn't exactly how I wanted to ask you, but… Will you officially be my girlfriend?"

"Yes, H. I'm all yours."

"Love it when you call me H." He pulled you in for a kiss that you both lost yourselves in, finally able to experience the feeling of one another after being denied it for so long. When a knock at the dressing room door came, Harry had to all but drag himself away from you, hair disheveled and lips swollen, scowling at the door.

You threw your head back and laughed as he stalked over and pulled it open with a flourish.

"What?"

"The hell's your issue?" you heard Mitch ask before Harry widened the door so he could see you laughing on the couch. You raised a hand in greeting and Harry's scowl deepened as Mitch chuckled, taking in both of your disheveled appearances. "Oh, shit, hey, sorry. Uh, car's ready when you are. See you tomorrow bud."

"Harry!" you chided once he'd closed the door in Mitch's face, giggles still bubbling out of your mouth. "He was just being polite."

"Interrupting arse is what he is," Harry said, sitting down and pulling you into his lap. "Where were we?"

You threw your arms around his neck and pressed your body as close to his as possible, hoping that he'd thought to lock the door before returning to your embrace. "Right about here, I think." With a hand on your hip, sliding under your shirt to reach warm skin and one at the back of your neck, Harry kissed you until you were breathless and not only wanting more but very seriously needing it.

"Come back to the hotel with me," he murmured against your lips as you ground your body down on him, reveling in the way the action made him throw his head against the back of the couch and exhale sharply.

"You sure?" Your hands smoothed over the chest of his skin, tracing the dark swallows with your fingertips as you rolled your hips.

He shuddered at the light touch and gripped your hips tightly, pressing his up as you pressed yours down and the action made you sigh, the pressure a delicious tease of what was hopefully to come. "Absolutely," he said, his grin telling you he was pleased with the noises he was causing you to make. "Want you so bad, like I won't be able to breathe right until I properly have you."

You leaned in to kiss at his neck, his shower-damp curls tickling your cheek. "The feeling is mutual. Adored watching you up on stage tonight. Have I told you yet how much I love seeing you perform?" You nuzzle at his neck, urging him to tilt his head back farther, exposing more of his skin to you.

"Yeah, you have, but tell me again," he sighed, his hands running up and down your back.

"It's like when you get on stage no one else before or after you matters," you said honestly, letting your lips against his skin hide how truthful you were really being, spilling all of your thoughts about seeing Harry up on stage. It was scary, feeling so deeply for him already. But you wanted him to know, at least in part, what it meant to be able to watch him perform. "Something about your live voice just makes my breath catch in my throat, I can't get enough of it."

Harry breathed deeply for a moment, working to center himself while you nosed at the curls around his ear and heaped praise upon him.

"It's like you connect with every person out in the crowd, like you're singing just for them. You can tell that you're having fun and people want to join you in that. They know you love the attention," you whispered and he hummed in appreciation (or agreement), the sound low in his throat. "They'd stay out there all night for if they could, screaming about how much they love you."

"And you feed into it, playing it up for them. You know exactly what you're doing when you get to act a little bit naughty up there, driving them all mad," you said with a smile.

He chuckled and you could hear and feel the sound rumble through him. "Played it up for you tonight. Did it work?"

"You mean did it make me want to jump your bones the second you came off stage? Yeah, it worked."

"Fucking hell," he said, holding you close with his hands on your butt as he stood up. "Our first time is not going to be in a dressing room so we need to go now."

He let you slide down his body and held you steady as you balanced on your legs. "Would be pretty fitting though, don't you think, given how we met and what we do?"

"Yeah, but then I'd think about it every time I was in one. You wanna torture me relentlessly?" He pulled you tight against him, kissing you once more before separating to grab his bags.

"Yeah, relentless torture sounds like something I might be into."

He glanced up at your words, eyes dark and hungry, a smirk on his lips. "Careful what you wish for, love."

///

The bass line increased behind the riff of Ryann's guitar and you leaned into the mic stand, eyes closing as you continued singing the first bridge. "I had a few, got drunk on you and now I'm wasted, and when I sleep I'm gonna dream of how you…"

There were a few fans of yours and Harry's who apparently knew the words as they helped you out, screaming the unwritten word that finished the sentence: "tasted."

///

Harry was quick to say goodbye to everyone on the team before pulling you quickly through back hallways and down quiet staircases, sneaking quick kisses when he was sure there was no one around. You were both out of breath when you finally climbed into the car, grinning like kids getting away with sneaking around.

The hotel ride was quick, mercifully, but Harry had been anything but patient, his hand at your knee creeping up slowly, closer and closer to the hem of your dress, toying with the hem while he chatted with the driver.

"I'm gonna head in first with Martin and Eric will loop around and drop you off at the side entrance. I would wait in the lobby for you but this hotel hasn't been the best in the past with uh— containing sensitive information, we'll say, so Martin will meet you on your floor to get your stuff, then bring you up. Is that okay?"

"You sound like you've done this before, Styles," you said with a wink, using humor to cover the nerves that had settled in the pit of your stomach.

He blushed and you loved knowing you got under his skin so easily. "The band used to stay here when we toured… and I was young and dumb once, yes."

"Just giving you a hard time, H."

His grin stretched as he leaned over to peck your lips once more. "See you in a minute, love."

Harry climbed out and the driver took off once again, slowly circling the block. "He's quite taken with you, you know," he said, glancing up in the rear view mirror as he parked the car at the curb. He got out and opened the door for you in the empty street then used his keycard to unlock the heavy side door of the hotel.

"Thank you," you said, both for his actions and his omission about Harry. Sure, you had talked to him as often as possible over the last weeks and had yourself been on the receiving end of his attention, but it felt validating to hear that Harry's feelings for you may have gone a bit farther than just a small crush if people around him had also noticed his behavior.

Harry's bodyguard was waiting by the elevators and escorted you to your room to gather your luggage, then led you to Harry's door.

"Car'll be around about 9 tomorrow morning, H. Flight's at 10:30." He turned to you. "I understand you have business to continue here in Chicago?"

"Yes, meetings tomorrow and then I fly back to Nashville in the evening."

"There'll be a driver ready for you tomorrow as well. He's been instructed to take you wherever you need to go and he'll stay until you depart. Have a nice evening," he nodded at Harry, who was smiling in the doorway, before departing.

"You didn't have to do that for me, I could've managed by getting an Uber," you said, stepping into the room past Harry to set your bags down and kick your shoes off.

"I didn't, was Martin's idea; says he doesn't want anything to happen to the one thing that's made me so happy these last few weeks."

"Oh yeah? I'm the one thing, huh?"

"You're everything, honestly," he replied a bit sheepishly, taking your hands in his. "Think I might like you a bit more than I already should. Lettin' my heart get a bit ahead of my head, I suppose."

"Yeah, I know the feeling," you said softly and he beamed.

He moved his hands up to cup your face, pulling you close for a sweet kiss that quickly turned insistent, heat rising between the two of you. Harry slid his hands under the hem of your shirt to rest where your spin ended and yours wrapped around his neck, dragging him down to you as you stepped behind you towards the bed. His long legs tangled with yours and you tumbled backwards, laughing as you hit the plush bed and Harry collapsed on top of you.

He propped himself up on his elbows and looked down at you with a smile, pushing the hair that had fallen into your face aside. "Hi baby," he said softly.

"Hi."

"Missed you," he said, leaning down for another sweet kiss.

"We were apart for like, eight minutes," you giggled between his kisses, your laughter giving way to a sigh as he moved to press a kiss to your nose, your cheek, your chin.

"Doesn't matter," he breathed into the crook of your neck, pressing small open mouth kisses to the soft skin there, "Any time apart is too long."

"The two weeks left of the tour will fly by. You should enjoy them while you can."

"Wish you could come with me, love performing for you." He kissed his way across the base of your neck, collarbone to collarbone as his fingers trailed to the small straps on your shoulders. "Would you like to take this off?"

"Please," you sighed, desperate and aching for the feeling of his skin against yours.

Your first time sleeping with Harry had been exactly what you'd wanted and expected - hot and fast, admittedly over a bit more quickly than either of you had wanted, but worth the weeks of wait.

Harry's skill set hadn't ended at singing and playing instruments. If anything, his vast experience using his hands and mouth only helped him excel in other pastimes that also utilized those parts of his body. To both of your delights, he had proven his adeptness in all areas multiple times that night, and once again in the morning before he had to rush into the shower, dragging you along with him simply to get more time together before you were forced apart once again.

///

You had spent the next two months away from one another, Harry having wrapped his tour and immediately beginning work on his next album. You'd spent your own time mixed between writing and recording an upcoming single. You had already written a handful of songs that were inspired by him and you'd wondered, albeit a bit nervously, if the sentiment was shared. When he stopped in Nashville on a long layover, pushing his flight back even longer to stay with you for another night, you'd tried to pry the information out of him. Unfortunately, no amount of sexual teasing or denial had convinced him — he, however, had you singing like a canary almost immediately, teasing you in the best way about how easily you opened up for him, telling him all about the music that he had already inspired.

You had been FaceTiming him late one night weeks later, both tired from long days spent in the studio. He had suddenly gotten shy, biting at the skin around his fingernails.

"Hey, stop that. What's the matter H?"

"Wanna ask you something," he mumbled, but a smile was peeking through where his fingers were still at his lips. "Jus' don't know how to."

"Baby," you sighed, "you can ask me anything. Y'know that."

"I know, I know." He paused and took a deep breath before a wide smile stretched across his face. "Would you maybe want to come home with me this Christmas? To London? Wouldn't be for long, maybe just a couple nights, I just wanna introduce you to my mum already, she's been pestering me nonstop lately 'bout meetin' you and Gem's joined in on it now too, so it's two against one when they call and I've told them that—"

"Harry," you said chucking, trying to interrupt his nervous rambling.

"—and she actually called me Harold last time she told me to bring you 'round and that got me a bit worried so I—"

"Harry! Of course I'll come with you. I'd absolutely love to."

You met him at the airport weeks later, desperate to pull him close and kiss him silly in the confines of his darkly tinted car, but you refrained, knowing how seriously Harry took the protection of your relationship from the press. You may not have been able to see anyone straining to capture pictures of you two, but you knew there was always the chance.

It was an entirely different story, however, when he'd finally pulled the car past the mechanical gate and into his private drive. You both reached for each other immediately, arms tangled and shifter knob pressed uncomfortably against your side, but perfectly content so long as his lips were against yours.

"Fuck— I missed you— so much," he muttered between kisses. He pulled away, forehead resting against yours, sly smirk pulling at his lips. "Mum won't expect us for a few hours at least."

"What is it that you're insinuating, Mr. Styles?"

"That there's plenty of time to give you a tour around the house, that's all," he said innocently. He gave you a sweet smile before hopping out of the car and coming to the passenger side where he helped you out and picked up your bags.

You were eager to be given a house tour, more than keen to learn all of the things you could about his London life. The house was decorated in a way that made you smile - eclectic but with a definitive air of cohesive taste. It suited Harry to an absolute tee. From the artwork that decorated the walls to the mismatched but homey furniture, you could tell immediately that this was Harry's sanctuary - every inch of the home screamed his name.

"It's incredible," you said as he led you into the largest room, the master. He walked over to the dresser that sat under the window and pulled open the top two drawers.

"I know we won't be here long, this time around, but I cleaned out a few drawers for you here, if you want to unpack some things. And there's space in the closet for you too," he nodded towards the door on the other side of the room, dragging a hand through his hair as he talked, "I had too much in there anyways and some of it needed to go and I wanted you to be able to leave some things, if you felt comfortable, of if Mum drags us out shopping and you don't want to take it all home now you can leave it here and-"

"You- you cleared out a drawer for me?"

"Well, yeah," he said, resting his hand on the back of his neck. "Made some space for you in the bathroom too, though I doubt it'll be enough, with all that you bring along to fix yourself up." He paused and thought for a moment. "I know how our lives are. I just wanted you to have some of your own space here; want you to feel as comfortable in my home as I do. Is that too much?"

"H," you said with a sigh, your lips curling into a smile, "it's perfect, and so thoughtful. I'm sorry I haven't done the same for you in Nashville yet."

"'s alright, love. I've already got a toothbrush there at least. I can take some time when we fly back to come and help if you'd like me to. As long as you don't end up wearing all the clothes that I leave there," he chuckled.

"You know me too well," you said, reaching for his hand. He lifted your entwined fingers to his lips to brush a kiss over your knuckles.

"You do look good in my clothes," he confessed, pulling you close to face him. "Look good in my house. But you always look good anyways."

"Said the pot to the kettle," you said with a smile. "I like being here already," you shrug, hands resting on his shoulders. "It feels like you, like home. Thank you for inviting me," you add, as though the measly voicing of your appreciation is enough to convey what you truly feel.

"You're welcome anytime, if I'm here or not."

"You trust me that much?"

"Yeah, I do. I'll get you a key and everything." He leaned down to kiss you slowly, relearning the map of your lips and mouth, before pulling away. He laughed when you made a noise of protest.

"The bathroom's over here if you'd like to freshen up." He had pulled at your hand, stepping towards the other open door in the room. "Figured a shower might sound nice after a long day in an airplane. Besides, I've gotta clean up before we go to Mum's anyways."

"Gonna join me?"

"Yeah, thought I might, if that's okay." His smirk had been wicked as he pushed you the rest of the way into the bathroom. He dropped your hand to reach for the hem of his shirt, pulling it over his head quickly. As he reached for the buckle of his pants, he had met your staring eyes. "See something you like, love?"

You definitely had, though you didn't think your attraction — physically or emotionally — for Harry had stopped at something that was as weak as "like." Getting to know him over the last six months had made you worry that there wasn't ever going to be anyone else like him, anyone that made you feel like he did. You had fallen for him, desperately hard, and the realization of it as you stood in front of his half-naked self almost embarrassed you.

"Babe? You alright?" he asked as he stripped down to his boxers.

"Yeah, you just got me all distracted," you had grinned, pulling your sweatshirt and remaining clothes off quickly before joining Harry under the warm spray of the water.

Meeting Harry's mom that evening went better than you could've ever dreamt it would. The two of you got on like old friends, and Harry had stared, almost in wonder, at how easily you seemed to bond with her. And then he had stared in horror as Anne offered to pull out the photo albums filled with pictures from Harry's childhood, particularly when Anne offered up the album filled with photos from Harry's and Gemma's emo phases.

As the evening wore on, you caught Harry on more than one occasion glancing your way, cheeks bright from the red wine he was sipping on and eyes warmly reflecting the bright Christmas lights. He always looked like he was a split second away from saying something, only to shake his head and look away with a small smile.

Later, in bed, Harry pulled you close to him. He was laying on his back, you on your side, and you threw a leg over his waist, soaking in all of the cuddles you could get on this short trip together. The room was only illuminated by the ambient light coming in through the blinds.

"Mum liked you a lot," he murmured, gently stroking the skin at the base of your spine, "said I should hang onto you".

You returned the gesture, running your fingertips along the lines of ink that make up his many tattoos. "I liked her too. She's wonderful, I see where you get it from now."

"Hey now, 'm wonderful all on my own!" He tickled your side and you couldn"t help but arch towards him, shrieking and laughing at the touch.

"Stop that! You are an absolute pest, you know that?" you said, grinning up at him.

"Ah, you love me," he whispered, and his joking tone made you smile but the way he pulled you tighter as he said it made you brave.

You let the weight what you were about to say wash over you, aware that things were going to change forever with just a few words. "I do love you, Harry," you whispered, moving up his body to press a kiss to his lips.

"Thank God," he had said, wrapping his arms back around you and pulling you on top of him. "Cause I love you too."

Leaving Harry after that had been even more difficult. All you wanted to do was be with him, but you had too much coming up with the future release of your album and Harry was still in the midst of doing his own writing and recording.

It was your professions, along with the desire to keep your relationship private, that kept you apart. You weren't sure how you did it, but your relationship had withstood the distance and odd-hours. The only step now would be deciding if, when, and how to confirm the suspicions to tabloids and fans alike that you were an item.

The wait was killing you. All you wanted was to show off to the world that Harry was yours.

///

The bridge of the song was followed quickly by the chorus and the heavy guitar and pounding drums had you rocking on your feet, body swaying into the mic stand as you let yourself get lost in the lyrics. "If you go out tonight, I'm going out 'cause I know you're persuasive."

The crowd was even more into the song now, many picking up on the words quickly and screaming them along with your singing. The rock and roll vibe of the song was coursing through you and the crowd, the arena electric with energy already.

"You got that something, I got me an appetite, now I can taste it."

You remove the mic from the stand and dance towards one end of the stage, singing as you move to the beat. "We're getting dizzy, oh, we're getting dizzy, oh! La da da da da! You get me dizzy, oh, you get me dizzy, oh!"

///

You had been on the phone with Harry one day in July, nearly five months after the release of your album, having him help you decide what the setlist of your tour would be when it began in November.

"I wish I could cover one of your songs."

He had laughed and slurped his tea, the sounds comforting to you, even over the phone. "That'd be a bit obvious, wouldn't it love?"

"I don't mean cover Golden or Kiwi," you said, tapping your pen against the pad of paper in front of you. "What about one you wrote for 1D? What about Perfect? Or Stockholm Syndrome! That was always one of my favorites."

"Getting permission on those might be a bit more difficult, s'not just me that's gotta sign off on it. Besides, do you really wanna be the artist that covers a One Direction song on her own headlining tour?"

"Guess I'll stick with singing along to them in the shower then."

You were both quiet for a moment, lost in your own thoughts.

"What if I covered Medicine?" you asked suddenly, realizing it was the perfect compromise, not to mention your favorite song that Harry himself performed oh his own tour. The rock sound wasn't a far cry from the roots that country music had and you knew it would sound great. "Even if it was just for one stop!"

"Hmm," Harry mused. "It would sound great with the band, I'll give you that. But videos will go around, people will know it's my song you're singing and they'll connect the dots about us."

"H, I'm ready for that if you are. I love you, and I'm ready to be able to share that love that I have for you with the world. Sneaking around has been fun but I want people to know how proud of you I am and how much you're loved and appreciated. Half of our fans know already, it's just a matter of us confirming it. I think that we could really-"

Harry was laughing at your rambling on the other end of the line. "Alright, alright, you drive a hard bargain, love. I think you're right, maybe it is time we stopped sneaking around. I'll try, but Jax and everyone else still have to agree to it too. It might be easier to convince everyone if it's just a one time thing. Pick another cover, something you'd normally do, in case it takes some time to work things out."

"I'll ask him right now! Thank you Harry!"

"I just have one condition," he said, and you could hear the grin that was surely pulling at the corners of his lips.

"What's that?"

"I get to perform it with you," he had said, and the smile already on your face widened exponentially. "If we're finally gonna make "us" public, may as well do it with a bang."

///

In the moment after the chorus, an 8 count beat is carried by the drummer and guitarist. For this performance, and the only performance you'd put on of this song, you had rehearsed the 8 count repeating once between the chorus and the next verse, as you needed a bit of extra time to announce your guest performer.

"Ladies and gentlemen," you shout into the mic, grin wide and face beaming already at what was about to take place. "To help me finish this performance, please help me welcome my very good friend, Harry Styles!"

Harry emerges from behind the stage holding his own wireless mic as much of the crowd screams - he may not be a country artist, but he was absolutely known worldwide. You step back with a wave of your arm, smiling as he begins the next chorus. His performance is for the crowd but he's singing the words directly to you.

"Tingle running through my bones, fingers to my toes, tingle running through my bones," he sings, voice smooth like whiskey, and the crowd adores him, eating out of the palm of his hand. "The boys and the girls are in, I mess around with them, and I'm OK with it."

You can't help but dance as he sings, his voice and the energy of the crowd propelling you to move. He watches you, eyes no longer on the crowd, as he sings the next lines. Immediately, heat pools low in your belly at his glance and the words.

"I'm coming down, I figured out I kinda like it. And when I sleep I'm gonna dream of how you…"

You gyrate your hips at the unsung line of "ride it", listening with a sly grin as some in the crowd scream the two words that go unsung.

///

After giving him a key, Harry had moved some of his clothes to your apartment in Nashville some time while you were away on the first leg of your tour. He had found the city to be incredibly welcoming and inspirational for his upcoming album and had decided to stay there for a spell while you continued to tour around the country.

You had scheduled a short break between your concerts over New Years, wanting to be able to grab at least one or two nights at home with him to celebrate the holiday before you were back on the road again.

"So fucking glad you're home," Harry panted, pulling your shirt over your head before attaching his lips to yours once again. "Missed you like crazy."

"Missed you too," you moaned as his lips moved downwards, across your neck and over your collarbones, down the valley between your breasts. Before he could reach around to unhook your bra, you reached for his shirt, as desperate as he was to see and touch what you'd been missing.

As he pulled the half-unbuttoned blouse over his head, you pulled your leggings off and reached for him, pushing him back onto the bed behind him. He unbuttoned his pants as he scooted up towards the middle of the bed, shoving them and his boxers off in one swoop.

You climbed on top of him, hurriedly reaching to kiss him as you rubbed your clothed center along the length of his hard cock.

"Fuck," he hissed, throwing his head back to allow you room to kiss his neck. "Desperate aren't you, darling?"

"Want you so bad it hurts," you whispered, sucking a bright hickey right where it would absolutely be seen by anyone.

You moved to continue kissing down his chest but he stopped you with a hand under your arm. "Not gonna last long, love. Wanna be inside you."

His cheeks and chest were flushed bright red, lips puffy and pupils blown wide. This was when you loved him most, being able to have him like no one else did. The same feeling always hit you at certain moments, particularly ones of domesticity, like when you watched him back the car out of the driveway or when he stood in the kitchen in the morning in nothing but socks, boxers, and his ratty old robe, singing along to old big band jazz as he waited for the coffee to brew. There was Harry Styles the musician, Harry Styles the actor, and Harry Styles the performer, but then there was your Harry.

"Yeah, okay," you sighed, moving off of him quickly to remove your bra and panties. You climbed back onto the bed and threw your leg over his hips, straddling him. He immediately reached for you and pulled you flush against his chest, his lips capturing yours in a bruising kiss.

You rocked your hips against him as he held you, your slick arousal gliding along his length, drawing a moan from both of you.

"Baby, please," he panted, and you could only mod in agreement, lost already to the sweeping feeling of your close release.

His hands rested on your hips as you positioned him at the entrance between your legs. You groaned in harmony as you worked down him slowly, the only sound in the room was your shared heavy breathing and gasps.

"Fuck me," he sighed as you set a slow pace, rocking on top of him to reach each spot that you know will get you there.

"Workin' on it," you grin. A quick swivel of your hips hit at just the right angle and you tossed your head back, repeating the movement over and over again until you shuddered with a final snap of tension, your orgasm rolling over you as Harry helped you move, hands tight on your hips, to wring all you could from the release.

"You look so beautiful right now, like a fuckin' angel," Harry said, voice low and gravely, accent thick with need.

"How's that line go?" you said as you slowed down, smirking when a harsh rock of your hips caused Harry to moan. "'Turns out she's a devil in between the sheets'?"

"Fuck," he groaned again, eyes closed tightly. "Can't just go reciting my own lyrics to me while I"m buried in ya like this, love."

"And there's nothing you can do about it," you continued, singing the line of his song this time, and his hips buck up into yours harshly.

"You're gonna pay for that," he had said, quoting another of his songs, before he had flipped you over onto your back and set his own brutal pace.

///

Like he can read your thoughts, Harry beams and wags a finger in your direction and the crowd screams at your chemistry together. You grab your mic from its stand and take a step towards Harry to sing the chorus together.

"If you go out tonight, I'm going out 'cause I know you're persuasive." Harry dances off to the side of the stage, performing once again for the crowd.

You dance at center stage with your wireless mic, too excited about performing with Harry that you can't stand in one spot. The music and Harry's energy make you want to move. "You got that something, I got me an appetite, now I can taste it."

"We're getting dizzy, oh, we're getting dizzy, oh! La da da da da!" Harry throws his head back, singing along in his own world and you can't look away from him. He really was a rockstar and getting to share the stage with him like this was an experience you'd never forget.

"You get me dizzy, oh, you get me dizzy, oh!"

There's a great pause in the lyrics where the guitar, keyboard, and drums play together, increasing the tension of the song. You and Harry take off towards opposite ends of the stage, both reveling in the performance for the crowd as you dance and stomp to the beat. Eventually, with a slide down the keys of the keyboard, the instrumental quiets into just the steady beat of the bass line joined by the hi-hats.

You and Harry urge the crowd to clap along as you both return to the middle of the stage to sing together once again. He always said that this portion of the song was one of his favorites to perform, the repeated line from the bridge ending abruptly with the lights going out before flashing back on, the added theatrics of the performance elevating the climax of the song completely. Having rehearsed that Harry would sing the following chorus alone, you let yourself get lost in his gaze as it settles on you.

You stand facing one another behind the mic stand, once again singing more to one another rather than to the crowd. You step closer towards him as the lyrics progress, nearly chest to chest now with your voices sharing one another's mics. "I had a few, got drunk on you and now I'm—"

Before you can sing the last word of the line and the lights can blink out as rehearsed, Harry leans forwards and captures your mouth in a hungry kiss. The crowd erupts with screams as the lights above the stage go dark.

You can feel rather than hear him say the words "I love you" against your lips and you have just enough time to repeat them back to him before the drums and guitar pick the beat up once again, the lights flashing back on brightly. He moves away and continues to sing the chorus that follows as if nothing had happened. You're a bit stunned, not having prepared for his relationship-revealing public display of affection to happen during your performance of his song but it was perfect and he knows it. Your smile is wide and you can't help but stand rooted where you are and laugh at what has just finally happened.

"If you go out tonight, I'm going out 'cause I know you're persuasive," he sings, smirking at you while you blush across from him.

You join him in singing the last lines, your right hand joining his left hand where everyone can see your fingers entwine.

"You got that something, I got me an appetite, now I can taste it. We're getting dizzy, oh, we're getting dizzy, oh!"

You urge the crowd with a waving hand to join in and they do, singing along with you and Harry. "La da da da da! You get me dizzy, oh, you get me dizzy, oh!"

The drums and guitar end the song on five quick beats and the crowd erupts once again in screams. You immediately jump towards Harry, throwing your arms around his neck in a close embrace. His hands wrap around your waist to hold you close, and you can feel him smile where his face is pressed close to your jaw.

"How was that?" he asks, chuckling against you.

"It was perfect, you're perfect. Thank you, H. For everything."

"Can take you on a proper date now, yeah? Wanna show my girl off to the world."

"Yes, please!" You can't wipe the smile from your face as he sets you down and Harry continues to beam at you as the crowd continues screaming, reeling from your shared performance.

Harry nudges you gently before turning back to them, lifting his and your arms high in the air and leading you in bending for a bow. He steps away from you and turns, opening his arms wide to you for the crowd to praise and you laugh, tearing up at his gesture and the overwhelming emotions of the performance while you take another bow just for yourself.

He pulls you into another hug and you can't help but angle your face up towards him, wordlessly asking for another very quick, very public kiss.

He glances down at you, smiling. "You're gonna love this now, aren't you?"

"Course I am. love showing them you're mine."

He leans down to peck your forehead, your nose, and finally, your lips, as the crowd goes wild. "Love showing them you're mine. You've got a show to finish, love. Go kill it."

///

Ahh! So much fun! This has been such a joy to write and I appreciate you taking the time to give it a chance! It’s my first (of hopefully many) Harry fics - reading all of the stories here has been immensely inspiring, and I’m so looking forward to writing more!

Tagging my love @morganlatte who is a wonderful hype woman and beta reader. Thanks buddy!

Anyways! Thank you for reading! My love language is words of affirmation (aka I have a praise kink) so leave me a comment here if you feel so inclined!

#harry styles #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles story #harry styles smut #harry styles one shot #harry styles fluff #one direction fanfiction #harry styles x you #reader insert fic #my writing #wow!#that was so much fun #i'm so in love with it

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aurora-daily · 2 years

Text

AURORA for Majestic Detroit

Every time I make an album I feel like I know why I’m here,” smiles beloved-to-millions singer, songwriter, unexpected TikTok sensation and omnipresent pop enigma Aurora. “There are so many dark forces roaming around the earth but music can be such a beam of light, if you allow it to be.” In a world so beautifully overrun by multifaceted pop artists, Aurora leads the pack. Admired by many of her peers — from Billie Eilish, Troye Sivan and Doja Cat to Katy Perry and Shawn Mendes — there’s a strong case to be made for Aurora being your favourite popstar’s favourite popstar. You know Aurora, even if you don’t know Aurora. So yes, that was Aurora’s face beaming out into the darkness during the Chemical Brothers’ 2019 Glastonbury headline slot, but yes that was also Aurora’s voice on 2015’s John Lewis Christmas ad. There she was at the 2020 Oscars, performing her contribution to Frozen 2’s pivotal track Into The Unknown, but there she also was at Coachella and at Lollapalooza, and across all those US talkshows, and that’s her music on millions of TikToks and, well, you get the idea. “I suppose I am a diverse human being,” she laughs. “But then, I think all people are, deep down. I just do what I want. I’m like an animal sometimes — to be honest most of the time I relate to the animals more than humans.” In 2019, approximately 48 hours after she released the second instalment of her two-part second album A Different Kind Of Human, Aurora started thinking about her next release. “Making music is my favourite thing to do,” she reasons, “so why should I not do it all the time?” Except this time her thinking was a bit different. She thought about extremism, the creation of enemies and moral superiority; false good and false evil. She thought about religion and then she thought about the concept of shame. “I couldn’t get past the sadness of how much shame is afflicted on us, just for being human,” she remembers today. “Shame for natural urges, and natural things. Shame that’s been so hurtful for so many groups of people. We beg forgiveness for not being perfectly divine, even if in many ways we are, actually, quite perfect.” She went to Australia and wrote Cure For Me, a song about unshackling from shame. It made her think of Panacea, the Greek goddess of remedy. Something was starting to make sense. “I realised my first album All My Demons Greeting Me As A Friend was very internal: its message was, if you’re having pain, accept that pain and be with it. The second albums were about how, once you’ve mended yourself, you can look outwards and see if you can do something for the world.” Now what if, Aurora wondered, her third album completed some sort of triptych? What if, after looking inward, then outward, she now looked skyward? “And that,” Aurora says, in the way that only Aurora can really say it, “is when I rented a castle.” She chose Rosendal, a structure surrounded by mountains, to record the rest of the album. The result is The Gods We Can Touch, an elegant but provocative album about shame, desire and morality, seen through the narrative prism of greek mythology. In each of the album’s songs we meet a different god. On Exist For Love, it’s Aphrodite; with Everything Matters it’s Atlas; God of endurance. We also meet Persephone, queen of the damned (on Heathens), Morpheus (This Could Be A Dream) and Peitho, the personification of seduction and persuasion (A Dangerous Thing). “The Greeks had gods and goddesses for everything,” Aurora notes. “For anxiety, for wine, for sex… Long ago when this concept of gods and goddesses started they were more human, more relatable, and almost touchable. Most importantly, they had flaws.” It’s through those perceived flaws in even gods and goddesses that Aurora has been able to explore the redundant concept of shame. “In short, this album is a celebration of the things we should never be ashamed of,” she adds. In the middle of it all we find core values like instinct, empathy and a sense of adventure. We also find acceptance, in Aurora’s words, “of what makes us different.” Giving In To Love, one of the album’s key songs, celebrates that difference. “It’s about not letting yourself be distracted by the demands of the world, and not forgetting what makes you divine,” she says. “There are so many factors in the world today that make it extremely hard to be human. Most of those things that affect our mental health and, and self image and our pride.” She mentions Prometheus, the Greek god of fire who created humanity from clay. “Giving In To Love,” she says, “is about seeing the value of the fire that we keep within us.” Growing up surrounded by forests and mountains near Bergen, Norway, Aurora first felt the compulsion to sit alone and create at six years old; by the time she was twelve she’d written Runaway, a song that would later receive a full release and, later still and thousands of miles away, inspire another twelve-year-old, Billie Eilish, to make her own music. “I didn’t understand where the melodies or words came from,” Aurora admits. “I used words whose meanings I didn’t even know. But I knew I felt good. And I couldn’t stop. It’s been all-consuming ever since. Sometimes I struggle to find meaning in anything else, because nothing else can compare.” Aurora’s success happened quite by accident. When a local performance was posted online Aurora, still just 15 years old, was tracked down by an impressed manager, who asked if she wanted to be an artist. Her response was instant: no. “I didn’t see any point in becoming an artist; that’s not that was driving me,” she remembers. But when she realised she could become an artist without jettisoning her individuality or her strength of spirit, that no turned into a yes. And since 2015 that yes has turned into platinum discs, a million album sales and a billion streams. And surprises along the way. The Gods We Can Touch was originally planned for a slightly earlier release, then an unexpected TikTok trend brought Runaway to a whole new global audience meaning that six years after release and 14 years after it was first written, Runaway was clocking up 300m daily views. “I find it as refreshing as it is surprising,” she says now. “Sometimes there are forces bigger than us, urging us to change our habits and plans. I just let the world go where it wants to and take my music where it wants to take it.” With Runaway’s success complicating her album’s planned release date, Aurora embraced the situation and wrote two extra songs: Giving In To Love, which became pivotal to the album’s essence, plus You Keep Me Crawling, a song about powerplay and relationship dynamics. “I’d been trying to explain the soul of this album,” she says, “and when I made You Keep Me Crawling it felt like the last word. After I had written it, I wasn't hungry for more. I felt like I was satisfied.” When you hear The Gods We Can Touch you’ll realise the story, spectacular as the last six years has been, is only just getting started. The album finds Aurora reunited with longterm producer Magnus Skylstad, and this time she’s also pulled together a carefully-curated cast of collaborators: from guitarist Fredrik Svabø, to previous collaborator Askjell Solstrand on piano, to French singer songwriter Pomme (who contributed French translations to Everything Matters), and renowned bandoneon player Per Arne Glorvigen on, well, bandoneon. A lot of what you’ll hear on the album, from instrumental contributions to Aurora’s own vocals on songs like Artemis and Exist For Love, are first takes. “It’s just that kind of album,” Aurora smiles. “That’s the energy I wanted.” The spontaneity of the recordings combines with the painstakingly constructed thematic elements to conjure an intoxicating album that’s somehow both immediate and timeless. It sounds a lot like an album that was made in a castle. Aurora recalls that when she arrived at Rosendal and began converting its old stable into a recording studio, she noticed the beauty of the nearby forests. “The leaves on the trees were the most wonderful colours,” she remembers. “By the time we left, with the album finished, the trees were naked and it was snowing.” Something had changed. Something in the trees that had enveloped the recording sessions, for sure, but for Aurora herself something else had shifted. “With every album I try to figure out what music means to people and why it’s so important,” she says. “I ask myself: ‘What would people wish to hear right now? What words do they need to hear? What could do good?’” In answering that question, she’s recorded an album that celebrates how spectacular each of us can be, by reminding us how unspectacular we also are. “It’s easy to make people believe they’re crazy, and it’s scary how quickly we can believe it,” she says, returning to the album’s central theme of shame. “We’re told we’re not normal. But we are. We’re so very, brilliantly normal."

#aurora #aurora aksnes #interviews #the gods we can touch #exist for love #artemis #you keep me crawling #giving in to the love #everything matters #heathens #this could be a dream #a dangerous thing

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eirikaanemo · 3 years

Text

My Celebrity Childhood Friend

Warnings: minor character death, sad feels

Venti x GN!Reader

2k Words

Many years ago, when you were eight years old, you had two very close friends. Their names were Venti and Himmel. The three of you did everything together. You were very close. All of you thought your friendship would be forever and that you would always be close. But, unfortunately, that's not what happened.

One day you and Venti received the news that Himmel had passed away. It was really difficult for both of you to accept the reality of his death, grieve, and move on with your lives. In the end, you couldn’t even help each other. Spending time together only reminded you of how Himmel wasn’t there anymore.

Eventually Venti just couldn’t take it anymore. So his family moved out. Losing Himmel had hurt, but losing Venti too reopened the almost healing wound in your heart. He didn’t even say goodbye because he thought he’d chicken out if he did. And so there you were, friendless, hurt, and feeling very, very alone.

Your only solace was in practicing the piano. The three of you had all been learning instruments and playing together before. The idea was to become a band of sorts together and play music professionally. Himmel played violin, Venti played guitar, and you played piano. Playing the piano was all you had left of them, so you continued playing and practicing it.

Years pass and you move on as much as you can. You make new friends and try new things. Piano is still important to you but you do new things now too. But even with all of this, there’s a part of you that left with Venti and Himmel. The hurt in your heart is no longer a gaping wound. Yet the pain has never truly gone away.

Then one day you hear a familiar voice on the radio. That voice and guitar combo sounded very familiar. It was a good song and you enjoyed listening to it, but you just couldn’t get the feeling of familiarity out of your mind. However, once the radio host introduced the song, you immediately understood. “And that was Soaring Bird by The Bard. Venti really did himself proud on this one…,” they continued, but you were no longer listening.

Venti was on the radio! What could this mean? You hurriedly took out your phone and ran a search. There he was, Venti, also known as The Bard, is a singer/songwriter who rose to fame after a stint on a television talent show a couple months ago. Well, what do you know? Your childhood friend has followed your childhood dream.

Part of you feels left behind, but you accepted that had happened years ago. So instead you decided to be supportive! Suddenly you have a new favorite singer and you just have to have all his albums. Physical copies, so you can display them. Your bedroom walls are covered with posters.

You now have more The Bard themed t-shirts than you have regular shirts. There’s a concert of his you can go to? You’re there. You promote him with everyone you know. If you hadn’t converted your friends to the truth of Venti supremacy they probably would have gotten sick of your antics by now. Instead they’re almost as invested as you are.

When he finally releases a new album you are thrilled. It’s been almost a year since he released his last one and you’ve been starving for new content. You are first in line to the store to buy the album and listen to it as soon as possible. Track one through four are fantastic and you enjoy them a lot! But then track five starts to play.

It’s more melancholy and nostalgic than other songs he has written. And then you hear the words. The words touch your heart, soothing and healing some of the pain that has remained. At the end he takes a moment to dedicate it to his childhood friend, to you. Not by name, but you know what he means by “my old childhood friend”. You’re tearing up.

I’m sorry I was too blind to see

That you were suffering as much as me

You were left behind, I was moving on

And you were left to carry on

It wasn’t right, it wasn’t fair

That I chose to just leave you there

We’re not really close now, are we

But I just want to say I’m sorry

You listened to it over and over again, crying in your room. Maybe it was stupid but that was something you didn’t even know you’ve been wanting to hear for years. Knowing that he felt bad about leaving you behind and hearing an apology from him meant the world to you.

And it just so happens that the song he dedicated to you is your friends’ new favorite song. If they didn’t know about your history with him before, then they sure know now. You’re still struggling to not cry every time it plays. Sure, maybe some of your dirty laundry was now being aired all around the world. But that wasn’t important.

What was important was that your heart was finally able to heal. You were truly able to feel happy again, for the first time since you were eight years old. Life had color again. There was more of a bounce to your step. Your friends noticed that your smiles even seemed more real now.

So when you learned that Venti would be doing an album signing event, you just knew you had to go. And you knew just which album you wanted to have signed. Now all you could think about was getting the album signed. How would he react to seeing you again? Would he recognize you? You really hope he does. It would really hurt if he doesn’t.

All of a sudden you’re now worrying if this is a good idea at all. Your friends managed to convince you to go, but you were really close to not going at all. And even now that you’re here at the signing you’re half considering running away. But instead you steel your courage and get in line.

You try not to think about it as the line slowly creeps forward. Making small talk with those around you in line might help, but you’re too nervous to even try social interaction. You’re twentieth in line, then tenth, then fifth, then second. Now it’s your turn and you approach the table he’s sitting at to sign the albums.

He’s wearing a white button up shirt, green slacks, and a green beanie with a flower on it. He’s dyed the tips of his braids teal and wears some light makeup to bring out the color of his eyes. You suddenly feel very underdressed as you anxiously walk up and hand him the album.

“Hi Venti,” you say softly. “It’s good to see you again.” He looks up sharply and freezes for a second, wide eyed. “Oh my gosh!” He exclaims, jumping up out of his seat. “It’s so good to see you again! It’s been so long!” You smile, feeling more comfortable and sure of yourself now that you know he recognizes you.

Someone behind him clears their throat and sits back down. “I can’t really talk right now,” he admits, sheepishly. “We don’t want to hold up the line, but hold on a sec.” He opens the album and scribbles something on the inside of the opaque cover. “That’s my number,” he whispers quietly to you. “Text me later, okay? I’ll get back to you when I can.”

You nod and move on, only realizing he didn’t actually sign the case until you were down the hall from where he was signing. Laughing a little, you sit down on a bench and pull out your phone. That was such a Venti-like thing for him to do. Sometimes he would get so excited that he’d forget what he was supposed to be doing.

Opening your texting app, you typed in his number and sent him a message.

You: Hi! Is this the right number? I’m the one you wrote song number five about.

It took a couple hours for him to reply. Which is very understandable considering how he was probably signing albums for a while.

Venti: Yes! This is the right number! It’s so good to hear from you again :)

Venti: And I’m so glad you heard that song

Venti: I really am sorry about leaving like that

You: I won’t lie and say that it’s fine, because it really hurt that you left like that

You: But I really appreciate your song that you wrote for me. I cry every time I hear it

Venti: Oh no! I didn’t mean to make you sad :(

You: Happy tears, Venti. They’re all happy tears

Venti: Oh, okay, that’s good :)

Venti: Want to come eat lunch with the staff and me?

Venti: They’re all really curious about you

Venti: The mysterious childhood friend I wrote a whole song about

You: Sure! How do I find you?

Venti: You don’t! Where are you? I’ll send someone to pick you up ;)

You send him your location and wait around for someone to come pick you up. After a while a nicely dressed woman approaches you and gestures for you to follow her. She leads you to a car and drives you to a restaurant. A waiter takes you to one of the closed off rooms for group events.

Approximately two seconds after the door is closed, you are hug tackled to the floor. Venti cheerfully cheers your name right into your ear. You grumble good naturedly and swat at him until he laughs and gets off you. He offers his hand, you take it, and he helps you stand up. Some chuckles from the staff tell me they’re just as amused as he is by the situation.

This sets the tone for your lunch. It’s lighthearted and you have a great time getting to know each other again. He introduces the staff and they admit they’ve been curious about his childhood friend he wrote a song about. You enjoy eating lunch with them a lot, and all of you are disappointed when you have to go.

You continue to chat as long as you can while preparing to leave. As you’re gathering your stuff to go, you come across the album that he never actually signed. “Oh yeah,” you laugh. “Venti, you never actually signed my album!”

“Whoops! I’ll sign that right now.” He declares. “Though I must admit that I feel a little awkward signing stuff for you.” Finishing writing with a flourish, he hands the album back to you. “But I guess I better get used to it,” he continues. “You better bring the rest of the albums next time!”

Your smile is so bright that he has to squint for a moment.. “I’m looking forward to it already.” You say. “See you later?” He beams right back. “Yep! I’ll let you know the next time we can meet up!”

The grin stays on your face all the way home.

You meet up whenever you can after that, though your schedules don’t always match up enough to allow it. Video calls are common when he goes on tour. It’s like the two of you never split. And eventually your friendship becomes something more.

“Hey, could I ask you a question?” Venti asks you over a video call one night. He’s acting a little funny, nervous with a dash of hope and excitement. “Would you like to go out with me sometimes? Like a date?” You chuckle, amused. “Venti, you’re on tour right now. It’s not like we could go out to dinner or something.”

“You’re right that we can’t go out to dinner together, but we could eat at the same time over a video call! I’ll even call and order food for you or something!” Venti plans. “Sure,” you agree. “I think I’d like that.” He pumps his fist in the air. “Yes!” He shouts. “I’m gonna make this the best long-distance date ever!”

And so he does.

#eirika writes #genshin venti #venti #venti x reader #genshin impact x reader #celebrity au

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1ddiscourseoftheday · 3 years

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🗣Tues 15 Dec ‘20🙊

Anyone order their daily with EXTRA DISCOURSE today? Lucky you, I guess, I'd send it back to the kitchen if I had the option but this is more a 'you'll take what you get and like it' kind of establishment so here we are! EAT UP we got Liam and Lou Teasdale making everyone mad, Louis and Harry's teams forgetting they're supposed to be mortal enemies, and Zayn?? Getting papped?? Omg is Z3 really coming this time? I've been burned so many times before (flown too close to the sun) but what if....... So first Gigi and zaby stroller were papped, then Zayn was papped in his usual way-- 'if you can get a good picture of me in the seconds it takes me to walk from my front door to the car have at it, that's exactly all you get'-- and then a fan reported seeing Zigi and zaby at a pizza restaurant. Zayn's hair is bleached white blond and that's about all I can tell you except that Z NEVER gets papped (or spotted really) for nothing so I am excite!!

Liam's back! He did the postponed-from-last-Tues hour long live for Stand Up To Cancer (and raised $16k!) and he's got a show in two days so I'd say his extremely brief breather is probably done with, whether he got the time he needed to be happy about coming back or not. He seems in good shape for the live though, even if he does say “its been a really long day, you don't even know, REALLY long” and that what he wants most for Christmas is “to have a little bit of time to reflect.” But he says he is going to take some time out and go away and write music “for the first time in a very long time,” in the new year, nice! He mentions how he went up to Sweden for recording recently and says it ”went really well I'm really really excited” about the new music and, uhhh, “got something sent through from Mick Fleetwood while I was over in Sweden writing, some guitar stuff, which was amazing, and he was dressed like santa at the time!” I...what??? I'll just... leave that there?? About other bands, he says that he's become a big fan of the Wanted over time, that “someone Zayn-ed out,” of Little Mix but “Zayn left for pretty much the same reasons and I do feel for them,” and “are 5SOS still together? Did they pull an us I thought they pulled an us?” He said yes, it's so great about Louis' show, and “it was great, and do you know what, like listening through those lyrics, it’s really nice to hear the truth in his music because obviously I mean I know all of the full story about him, and [pause].. and uh... his relationship with his girlfriend and whatever else,” SKLDYSSKKJ.

This long live also had him responding to screen comments he would usually ignore (though thank GOD he only reads but doesn't answer 'what happened with Niall in Japan' please tell me the questioner wasn't trying to get him to comment on the 'violently masturbating' story), anyway so we got Liam on touching his hair if larry is real-- “of course that's not going to happen don't be silly,” and on whether he thinks 'larry is disrespectful' “sometimes I do... actually that's not true, all the time I do.” Well he's not wrong though I'd expand that to 'all the fans' but if I had to wade through a million “touch your nose if larry is real” comments every time I was promoting my own material, for ten years, I'd probably get tetchy too! He didn't say it was or wasn't real, as he himself pointed out he never WILL do that for REASONS; tbh I'm with Liam can people PLEASE stop being so embarrassing on main and let him live? ANYWAY, moving on, his Advent Alarm clock today is the sleep story edited down to be just Liam laughing for like 30 seconds, aka the exact edit that I suggested they should make a couple weeks ago, which I find frankly extremely alarming (ALARMing HA) are they... listening to me?? Well if Liam's management are looking for ideas BOY HAVE I GOT SOME FOR THEM hit me up fellas PLEASE.

Harry and Louis both announced further postponements of their UK and Europe tour shows, like really the same announcement and just fully back to back, I can only assume that after weeks of intensive hashing out to match up dates their teams have arrived at some kind of plan and were like cool let's announce! Louis has added some new shows, while Harry's new schedule is undisclosed as yet. Harry says “I really hope to play these shows and will have news for you in the new year on when they will take place.” Louis' new dates include previously omitted countries (Iceland! Austria!), and those tickets go on sale Friday. Harry did not respond to Rob Sheffield's awkward attempt to link Watermelon Sugar and WAP as being similar but he did like Megan Thee Stallion's post celebrating her successful year, and Vulture ranked Adore You in its top 5 videos of the year with a much better take on what Harry is all about, saying that it “highlights one of the singer’s best traits: his willingness to be delightfully weird.” Kid Harpoon said that he and Harry “wrote a song in Japan that may yet see the light of the day,” and Harry continues to roast him, disputing his songwriter of the year award-- “they found 8,000,000 opposing ballots in a bin behind his house! FRAUD!”

And last but most discourse-y-est of all, The Sun made waves today, pulling the most salacious parts of a Lou Teasdale interview with the Sex, Lies and DM Slides podcast from last week and bringing it to wider attention. In the interview she talked at length about systemic discrimination against women working in the music industry and her own work experiences, which naturally include (very briefly) touching on her highest profile job- the years she spent traveling with 1D. In this context she says “you kind of can’t sleep with them [the band]- it’s quite important to keeping your job... some people would come in and like you know assistants and stuff and I think they would really think... that it was love and obviously it’s not,” and “it’s just the quickest way to lose your job- because then they’ve got a new girlfriend and she’s there and they don’t want you in the room.” She did not sell her story to The Sun she mentioned this in passing as part of an interview about her work experiences; she herself says, “I didn’t do an interview [with] the sun. I’ve never done that. I did a podcast with friends about loads of things.”

There is nothing remotely unlikely in this story, either in the concept that members of the band slept with girls casually (we know that certain of them did and there isn't even anything wrong with that in a situation of consent, the denial of it is as bizarre as scribbling out the beer bottle in a 28 year old man's hand), or that low level members (“assistants and stuff”) of the 150 person+ crew appeared and disappeared on a regular basis. The band were, to my guess, probably simply not paying very much attention to the serious ramifications of this carelessness and the consequences rather than demanding that people be fired, but I do very much hope they've learned over the years to be responsible for the kind of power that they have over other peoples' lives (something I really doubt they understood the extent of yet as very young people being dragged from one place to another who felt powerless themselves).

#liam payne #harry styles #louis tomlinson #zayn #lou teasdale #listen: people talk about wanting the 1D tell all but I don't think you guys do want it at all tbh #you know the whole point of that is that it will destroy the 'perfect angels' front that was created around the boys?#loving and supporting someone even though you know they are imperfect and flawed is not something to be ashamed of though #so I say bring it on #Liam has SO MANY reasons to be cranky right now and coming back online to everyone clamoring for him to comment #on Louis' record breaking veeps stream... honestly think it through?? have some fucking tact #Liam also said Freddie and Bear facetime which is just such clear nonsense I have no comment he just wants to make people happy #I DON'T KNOW if the Mick Fleetwood thing is real like – he seems dead serious??? I think it's serious?#How fucking Liam is that right he is as ever the most unrealistic I'm bringing back that tag:#Liam is a Gary Sue #Zaayyyyn is Z3 coming??? listen may I suggest sir-- LIVEZTREAM??? PLEASE?#I know you won't tour and wouldn't want you to but just consider how PERFECT this would be?? PLEASE SIR #lost in the shuffle: Lou Teasdale also addressed the old quote about keeping the 1D boys from looking 'too feminine'#(assumed to be @harry) saying 'it’s taken totally out of context. A clip from male grooming interview talking about grooming men.#I have no problem with men wearing make up or looking feminine it’s my profession. I apologise it sounds like that here.'#I feel like the truth is somewhere in between but I very much doubt she- the MUA- had final say over their images #and might well have not been the only thing standing between harry and his nail art and eyebrow grooming #I don't like her but like- dislike her for better reasons!#There are plenty she's very annoying but talking about sexism in the workplace and telling her story isn't one of them #Liam said he was very drunk watching Louis' show #I have a lot of things I'd like to say to Liam's management but mostly not publicly and some of them very rude #but I will say that while I guess the acknowledgement that young girls are the real drivers of the music industry and should be courted is #cool the continued obsession with only marketing these guys to that demographic was always ridiculous #and gets worse every year and Liam's team is simply throwing away money and fans by not marketing him so hard (heh) to out gay men #long post

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path-of-my-childhood · 4 years

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The Story Behind Every Song on folklore - According to Aaron Dessner

By: Brady Gerber for Vulture Date: July 27th 2020

The National multi-instrumentalist spoke to Vulture over the phone from upstate New York a few hours after the surprise release of Swift’s eighth studio album. (“A pretty wild ride,” he admits, sounding tired yet happy.) He was clear that he can’t speak on behalf of Swift’s lyrics, much like he can’t for The National frontman Matt Berninger’s either, or the thinking behind Jack Antonoff’s songs. (Here’s a cheat sheet: Jack’s songs soar, Aaron’s glide.) But Dessner was game to speak to his specific contributions, influences, and own interpretations of each song on folklore, a record you can sum up by two words that came up often during our conversation: nostalgic and wry.

“the 1″

“the 1” and “hoax,” the first song and the last song, were the last songs we did. The album was sort of finished before that. We thought it was complete, but Taylor then went back into the folder of ideas that I had shared. I think in a way, she didn’t realize she was writing for this album or a future something. She wrote “the 1,” and then she wrote “hoax” a couple of hours later and sent them in the middle of the night. When I woke up in the morning, I wrote her before she woke up in LA and said, “These have to be on the record.” She woke up and said, “I agree” [laughs] These are the bookends, you know?

It’s clear that “the 1” is not written from her perspective. It’s written from another friend’s perspective. There’s an emotional wryness and rawness, while also to this kind of wink in her eyes. There’s a little bit of her sense of humor in there, in addition to this kind of sadness that exists both underneath and on the surface. I enjoy that about her writing.

The song began from the voice memo she sent me, and then I worked on the music some and we tracked her vocals, and then my brother added orchestration. There are a few other little bits, but basically that was one of the very last things we did.

“cardigan“

That’s the first song we wrote [in early May]. After Taylor asked if I would be interested in writing with her remotely and working on songs, I said, “Are you interested in a certain kind of sound?” She said, “I’m just interested in what you do and what you’re up to. Just send anything, literally anything, it could be the weirdest thing you’ve ever done,” so I sent a folder of stuff I had done that I was really excited about recently. “cardigan” was one of those sketches; it was originally called “Maple.” It was basically exactly what it is on the record, except we added orchestration later that my brother wrote.

I sent [the file] at 9 p.m., and around 2 a.m. or something, there was “cardigan,” fully written. That’s when I realized something crazy was happening. She just dialed directly into the heart of the music and wrote an incredible song and fully conceived of it and then kept going. It harkens back to lessons learned, or experiences in your youth, in a really beautiful way and this sense of longing and sadness, but ultimately, it’s cathartic. I thought it was a perfect match for the music, and how her voice feels. It was kind of a guide. It had these lower register parts, and I think we both realized that this was a bit of a lightning rod for a lot of the rest of the record.

The National’s Influence On Swift

She said that she’s a fan of the emotion that’s conveyed in our music. She doesn’t often get to work with music that is so raw and emotional, or melodic and emotional, at the same time. When I sent her the folder, that was one of the main feelings. She said, “What the fuck? How do you just have that?” [laughs] I was humbled and honored because she just said, “It’s a gift, and I want to write to all of this.” She didn’t write to all of it, but a lot of it, and relatively quickly.

She is a fan of the band, and she’s a fan of Big Red Machine. She’s well aware of the sentiment of it and what I do, but she didn’t ask for a certain kind of thing. I know that the film [I Am Easy To Find] has really affected her, and she’s very much in love with that film and the record. Maybe it’s subconsciously been an influence.

“the last great american dynasty”

I wrote that after we’d been working for a while. It was an attempt to write something attractive, more uptempo and kind of pushing. I also was interested in this almost In Rainbows-style latticework of electric guitars. They come in and sort of pull you along, kind of reminiscent of Big Red Machine. It was very much in this sound world that I’ve been playing around with, and she immediately clicked with that. Initially I was imagining these dreamlike distant electric guitars and electronics but with an element of folk. There’s a lot going on in that sense. I sent it before I went on a run, and when I got back from the run, that song was there [laughs].

She told me the story behind it, which sort of recounts the narrative of Rebekah Harkness, whom people actually called Betty. She was married to the heir of Standard Oil fortune, married into the Harkness family, and they bought this house in Rhode Island up on a cliff. It’s kind of the story of this woman and the outrageous parties she threw. She was infamous for not fitting in, entirely, in society; that story, at the end, becomes personal. Eventually, Taylor bought that house. I think that is symptomatic of folklore, this type of narrative song. We didn’t do very much to that either.

“exile” (ft. Bon Iver)

Taylor and William Bowery, the singer-songwriter, wrote that song initially together and sent it to me as a sort of a rough demo where Taylor was singing both the male and female parts. It’s supposed to be a dialogue between two lovers. I interpreted that and built the song, played the piano, and built around that template. We recorded Taylor’s vocals with her singing her parts but also the male parts.

We talked a lot about who she thought would be perfect to sing, and we kept coming back to Justin [Vernon]. Obviously, he’s a dear friend of mine and collaborator. I said, “Well, if he’s inspired by the song, he’ll do it, and if not, he won’t.” I sent it to him and said, “No pressure at all, literally no pressure, but how do you feel about this?” He said, “Wow.” He wrote some parts into it also, and we went back and forth a little bit, but it felt like an incredibly natural and safe collaboration between friends. It didn’t feel like getting a guest star or whatever. It was just like, well, we’re working on something, and obviously he’s crazy talented, but it just felt right. I think they both put so much raw emotion into it. It’s like a surface bubbling. It’s believable, you know? You believe that they’re having this intense dialogue.

With other people I had to be secretive, but with Justin, because he was going to sing, I actually did send him a version of the song with her vocals and told him what I was up to. He was like, “Whoa! Awesome!” But he’s been involved in so many big collaborative things that he wasn’t interested in it from that point of view. It’s more because he loved the song and he thought he could do something with it that would add something.

“my tears ricochet”

This is one of my absolute favorite songs on the record. I think it’s a brilliant composition, and Taylor’s words, the way her voice sounds and how this song feels, are, to me, one of the critical pieces. It’s lodged in my brain. That’s also very important to Taylor and Jack. It’s like a beacon for this record.

“mirrorball”

“mirrorball” is, to me, a hazy sort of beautiful. It almost reminds me of ‘90s-era Cardigans, or something like Mazzy Star. It has this kind of glow and haze. It feels really good before “seven,” which becomes very wistful and nostalgic. There are just such iconic images in the lyrics [“Spinning in my highest heels”], which aren’t coming to me at the moment because my brain is not working [laughs].

How Jack Antonoff’s Folklore Songs Differ From Dessner’s

I think we have different styles, and we weren’t making them together or in the same room. We both could probably come closer together in a sense that weirdly works. It’s like an archipelago, and each song is an island, but it’s all related. Taylor obviously binds it all together. And I think Jack, if he was working with orchestrations, there’s an emotional quality to his songs that’s clearly in the same world as mine.

We actually didn’t have a moodboard for the album at all. I don’t think that way. I don’t really know if she does either. I don’t think Jack... well, Jack might, but when I say the Cardigans or Mazzy Star, those aren’t Jack’s words about “mirrorball,” it’s just what calls to mind for me. Mainly she talked about emotion and to lean into it, the nostalgia and wistfulness, and the kind of raw, meditative emotion that I often kind of inhabit that I think felt very much where her heart was. We didn’t shy away from that.

“seven”

This is the second song we wrote. It’s kind of looking back at childhood and those childhood feelings, recounting memories and memorializing them. It’s this beautiful folk song. It has one of the most important lines on the record: “And just like a folk song, our love will be passed on.” That’s what this album is doing. It’s passing down. It’s memorializing love, childhood, and memories. It’s a folkloric way of processing.

“august”

This is maybe the closest thing to a pop song. It gets loud. It has this shimmering summer haze to it. It’s kind of like coming out of “seven” where you have this image of her in the swing and she’s seven years old, and then in “august” I think it feels like fast-forwarding to now. That’s an interesting contrast. I think it’s just a breezy, sort of intoxicating feeling.

“this is me trying”

“this is me trying,” to me, relates to the entire album. Maybe I’m reading into it too much from my own perspective, but [I think of] the whole album as an exercise and working through these stories, whether personal or old through someone else’s perspective. It’s connecting a lot of things. But I love the feeling in it and the production that Jack did. It has this lazy swagger.

“illicit affairs”

This feels like one of the real folk songs on the record, a sharp-witted narrative folk song. It just shows her versatility and her power as a songwriter, the sharpness of her writing. It’s a great song.

“invisible string”

That was another one where it was music that I’d been playing for a couple of months and sort of humming along to her. It felt like one of the songs that pulls you along. Just playing it on one guitar, it has this emotional locomotion in it, a meditative finger-picking pattern that I really gravitate to. It’s played on this rubber bridge that my friend put on [the guitar] and it deadens the strings so that it sounds old. The core of it sounds like a folk song.

It’s also kind of a sneaky pop song, because of the beat that comes in. She knew that there was something coming because she said, “You know, I love this and I’m hearing something already.” And then she said, “This will change the story,” this beautiful and direct kind of recounting of a relationship in its origin.

“mad woman”

That might be the most scathing song on folklore. It has a darkness that I think is cathartic, sort of witch-hunting and gaslighting and maybe bullying. Sometimes you become the person people try to pin you into a corner to be, which is not really fair. But again, don’t quote me on that [laughs], I just have my own interpretation. It’s one of the biggest releases on the album to me. It has this very sharp tone to it, but sort of in gothic folklore. It’s this record’s goth song.

“epiphany”

For “epiphany,” she did have this idea of a beautiful drone, or a very cinematic sort of widescreen song, where it’s not a lot of accents but more like a sea to bathe in. A stillness, in a sense. I first made this crazy drone which starts the song, and it’s there the whole time. It’s lots of different instruments played and then slowed down and reversed. It created this giant stack of harmony, which is so giant that it was kind of hard to manage, sonically, but it was very beautiful to get lost in. And then I played the piano to it, and it almost felt classical or something, those suspended chords.

I think she just heard it, and instantly, this song came to her, which is really an important one. It’s partially the story of her grandfather, who was a soldier, and partially then a story about a nurse in modern times. I don’t know if this is how she did it, but to me, it’s like a nurse, doctor, or medical professional, where med school doesn’t fully prepare you for seeing someone pass away or just the difficult emotional things that you’ll encounter in your job. In the past, heroes were just soldiers. Now they’re also medical professionals. To me, that’s the underlying mission of the song. There are some things that you see that are hard to talk about. You can’t talk about it. You just bear witness to them. But there’s something else incredibly soothing and comforting about this song. To me, it’s this Icelandic kind of feel, almost classical. My brother did really beautiful orchestration of it.

“betty”

This one Taylor and William wrote, and then both Jack and I worked on it. We all kind of passed it around. This is the one where Taylor wanted a reference. She wanted it to have an early Bob Dylan, sort of a Freewheelin’ Bob Dylan feel. We pushed it a little more towards John Wesley Harding, since it has some drums. It’s this epic narrative folk song where it tells us a long story and connects back to “cardigan.” It starts to connect dots and I think it’s a beautifully written folk song.

Is ‘betty” queer canon? I can’t speak to what it’s about. I have my own ideas. I also know where Taylor’s heart is, and I think that’s great anytime a song takes on greater meaning for anyone.

Is William Bowery secretly Joe Alwyn? I don’t know. We’re close, but she won’t tell me that. I think it’s actually someone else, but it’s good to have some mysteries.

“peace”

I wrote this, and Justin provided the pulse. We trade ideas all the time and he made a folder, and there was a pulse in there that I wrote these basslines to. In the other parts of the composition, I did it to Justin’s pulse. Taylor heard this sketch and she wrote the song. It reminds me of Joni Mitchell, in a way - there’s this really powerful and emotional love song, even the impressionistic, almost jazz-like bridge, and she weaves it perfectly together. This is one of my favorites, for sure. But the truth is that the music, that way of playing with harmonized basslines, is something that probably comes a little bit from me being inspired by how Justin does that sometimes. There’s probably a connection there. We didn’t talk too much about it [laughs].

“hoax”

This is a big departure. I think she said to me, “Don’t try to give it any other space other than what feels natural to you.” If you leave me in a room with a piano, I might play something like this. I take a lot of comfort in this. I think I imagined her playing this and singing it. After writing all these songs, this one felt the most emotional and, in a way, the rawest. It is one of my favorites. There’s sadness, but it’s a kind of hopeful sadness. It’s a recognition that you take on the burden of your partners, your loved ones, and their ups and downs. That’s both “peace” and “hoax” to me. That’s part of how I feel about those songs because I think that’s life. There’s a reality, the gravity or an understanding of the human condition.

Does Taylor Explain Her Lyrics?

She would always talk about it. The narrative is essential, and kind of what it’s all about. We’d always talk about that upfront and saying that would guide me with the music. But again, she is operating at many levels where there are connections between all of these songs, or many of them are interrelated in the characters that reappear. There are threads. I think that sometimes she would point it out entirely, but I would start to see these patterns. It’s cool when you see someone’s mind working.

“the lakes”

That’s a Jack song. It’s a beautiful kind of garden, or like you’re lost in a beautiful garden. There’s a kind of Greek poetry to it. Tragic poetry, I guess.

The Meaning Of Folklore

We didn’t talk about it at first. It was only after writing six or seven songs, basically when I thought my writing was done, when we got on the phone and said, “OK, I think we’re making an album. I have these six other ideas that I love with Jack [Antonoff] that we’ve already done, and I think what we’ve done fits really well with them.” It’s sort of these narratives, these folkloric songs, with characters that interweave and are written from different perspectives. She had a vision, and it was connecting back in some way to the folk tradition, but obviously not entirely sonically. It’s more about the narrative aspect of it.

I think it’s this sort of nostalgia and wistfulness that is in a lot of the songs. A lot of them have this kind of longing for looking back on things that have happened in your life, in your friend’s life, or another loved one’s life, and the kind of storytelling around that. That was clear to her. But then we kept going, and more and more songs happened.

It was a very organic process where [meaning] wasn’t something that we really discussed. It just kind of would happen where she would dive back into the folder and find other things that were inspiring. Or she and William Bowery would write “exile,” and then that happened. There were different stages of the process.

Okay, but is it A24-core? [Laughs.] Good comparison.

#Aaron Dessner #interview #vulture #about taylor #taylor swift #folklore album #folklore era #songwriting #producer #the national #bon iver

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thesibfiles · 3 years

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Courtney going on tour right after?

Theres a misconception that after Kurts death, Courtney went straight on tour right away. This is false. The album was already set to release a few days after and they couldnt change that on such a short notice. Promotion for the album was cancelled and she pushed back the tour 4 months.

“Live Through This was supposed to provide Love an opportunity to step out from her famous husband’s shadow. “It’s annoying now, and it’s been annoying for nine years, Love said in a 1999 Jane Magazine interview of always being connected to Cobain. Released four days after Cobain’s body was found, the album’s promotion was put on hold. Rather than retreat from the public eye, Love openly mourned and helped fans of Cobain and Nirvana make sense of the singer’s death. She sat with grieving teenagers gathered outside the couple’s Seattle home and recorded a reading of parts of his suicide note that was played at the singer’s memorial that gathered near the Space Needle. In the days following his death, Love showed a very raw and emotional side and admitted that, like many fans, she didn’t have all the answers.

It was, and still is, impossible for people to discuss Live Through This without noting the irony of the album’s title. Love has said the name was not a prediction at all, but instead a reflection of all she had endured in the months leading up to its release, including a very public custody fight with the Los Angeles Department of Family Services over daughter Frances Bean. Rumors suggested that Cobain had written much of Live Through This (it’s Miss World, not Mister, just FYI). “I’d be proud as hell to say that he wrote something on it, but I wouldn’t let him. It was too Yoko for me. It’s like, ‘No fucking way, man! I’ve got a good band, I don’t fucking need your help,’” was Love’s response to critics in Spin’s oral history of Live Through This. Love and Cobain often shared notebooks and lyrics with each other, and while there is talk of Cobain’s influence on Love’s work, or the writing of all of it, less is mentioned in the press of her impact on his lyrics and music. Rather than sucking all the life out of Nirvana or threatening the success of the band, like many assumed she would do, she inspired Cobain. Fun fact: In Utero, Nirvana’s last album, was named after a line from one of Love’s poems.

Sadly, songwriting rumors would be replaced by other rumors. Women are often vilified and condemned for the deaths of their male partners. Love, like all women, was supposed to save her partner from death and addiction. Fans of Cobain projected all their anger and resentment over the loss of the Nirvana front man onto Love, and soon she was blamed for not only his addiction but also his death. There are even two movies devoted to the theory that Courtney killed Kurt: the awful Soaked in Bleach (2015) and the equally awful Kurt & Courtney (1998). If you think we’ve come a long way, baby, sadly we haven’t.

One year after Anthony Bourdain’s death, Asia Argento is still being blamed, and in September 2018, Ariana Grande had to take a break from social media after fans blamed her for the death of her ex Mac Miller. A few months later, she would be blamed for new beau Pete Davidson’s mental health and addiction issues. It’s amazing she finds the time to write hit songs what with all the dude destruction she has going on. When women are not being blamed for the deaths of the men in their lives, they are being attacked for not grieving properly. “She wasn’t crying. She’s got $30 million coming to her. Do you blame her for being so cool?” a hospital staffer said of Yoko Ono following John Lennon’s murder in 1980.

About four months after Cobain’s death, Love went on tour to promote her new album. Some questioned and judged why she would go on tour so soon, but Love has said it was a necessity. She had a young daughter to support. She needed to work. She also, sadly, still needed to prove herself. “I would like to think that I’m not getting the sympathy vote, and the only way to do that is to prove that what I’ve got is real,” Love told Rolling Stone in 1994.

Twenty-five years later, Cobain’s death still hangs over Live Through This. In the days leading up to the anniversary of Cobain’s death, former Hole bassist Melissa Auf der Maur wrote an open letter to music magazine Kerrang saying she “would not stand for Kurt’s death overshadowing the life and work of the women he left behind this year.”

“We were extremely well designed for each other,” Love has said of her relationship with Cobain. In a letter reprinted in Dirty Blonde: The Diaries of Courtney Love, she calls him “my everything. the top half on my fraction.” The two had similar upbringings, both came from broken homes and spent childhoods shuttling between relatives and friends. They both grew up longing for love and acceptance. When we tell the story of Kurt and Courtney we talk about drugs and destruction, but we don’t talk enough about love.

The two also shared an intense drive and ambition. “I didn’t want to marry a rock star, I wanted to be one,” Love said in a 1992 Sassy interview. Evidence of her drive can be found in the many notes and to-do lists she kept, some of which are collected in Dirty Blonde. There are reminders to send her acting résumé to agencies, to write three to four new songs a week, to “achieve L.A. visibility.” A scene in the documentary Kurt & Courtney features an ex of Love’s reading from one of her to-do lists, which has “become friends with Michael Stipe” as the number one task to complete (not only did Love do this, but he is her daughter’s godfather). This ambition is not surprising from a woman who, when she was younger, mailed a tape of herself singing to Neil Sedaka in hopes of getting signed. Love knew what she wanted at an early age, and what she wanted was fame.

She was certainly living by the “do not hurt yourself, destroy yourself, mangle yourself to get the football captain. Be the football captain!” motto she championed in the 1995 documentary Not Bad for a Girl. Ambition is often a dirty word when it is used to describe women and Love is no exception. She has been repeatedly described as calculating and controlling when she should be rewarded for her blond ambition and viewed as an inspiration. Critics and the press often call her a gold digger who only married Cobain for fame and money. They fail to mention that when the two met Pretty on the Inside was actually selling more copies than Bleach, Nirvana’s debut album. Even post-Kurt, Love’s intentions were always under scrutiny. On the Today Show to do press for The People vs. Larry Flynt, Love refused to talk about her past drug use, despite the host’s repeated questions, saying the topic was not an appropriate fit for the show’s demographic. She was right, but it didn’t stop a writer from describing the move as “calculating” in a 1998 Spin piece.

Cobain was ambitious too; he was just much slyer and more secretive about it. He was known to call his manager and complain when MTV didn’t play Nirvana’s videos enough, and he would correct journalists who misquoted the band’s sales figures in interviews. While success is typically celebrated and rewarded for men and it certainly was for Cobain, he also had to be mindful of the slacker generation that loved Nirvana and greeted success — and especially mainstream success —

While female celebrities like Love are criticized for their rebellion, male celebrities, like Cobain for example, are celebrated and mythologized for it. Cobain and Love both struggled with addiction, but it is Love who is repeatedly vilified for her drug use. “She was vilified for being a mess, for being a drug addict, for not being a great parent — in other words, all of the things we expect in a male rock star,” said Bust magazine in a piece in the magazine’s 20th anniversary issue, which featured Love on the cover.

We make jokes about the drug antics of male celebrities from Keith Richards to Charlie Sheen, idolizing their debauchery and depravity. The new Netflix/Lifetime movie by Jack Daniels, The Dirt, about Mötley Crüe, takes the band’s excesses to almost comic levels. Check out crazy tourmate Ozzy Osbourne snorting a line of ants by a hotel pool! Such zany antics! I would love to see Lindsay Lohan try to get away with that. We never allow women to live down their arrests and their addictions, but we repeatedly allow men to have a redemption arc. Robert Downey Jr. was in and out of jail and on and off drugs for much of the mid to late ’90s, but we rarely, if ever, talk about his past.

When Love isn’t being attacked for her addiction issues, she is being judged for her parenting. Love’s first unflattering press was “Strange Love,” the much publicized 1992 Vanity Fair profile by Lynn Hirschberg. While the piece talks at length about Love’s drug use and constantly questions her parenting ability, it doesn’t paint Cobain in the same light. “It is appalling to think that she would be taking drugs when she knew she was pregnant,” says one close friend in the piece. Hirschberg relies on many unnamed sources and focuses often on the tabloid-like aspects of Love’s life and addictions. “Courtney has a long history with drugs. She loves Percodans (‘They make me vacuum’), and has dabbled with heroin off and on since she was eighteen, once even snorting it in Room 101 of the Chelsea Hotel, where Nancy Spungen died,” she writes. “Reportedly, Kurt didn’t do much more than drink until he met Courtney.” (Even when it is reported by Kurt and Krist that Kurt tried heroin in 1989, way before Courtney, It was also known that he smoked weed and used caugh syrup to get high in 1989 and 1990.)

This double standard was common in coverage of the couple. In Kurt Cobain: Montage of Heck, the 2015 documentary by Brett Morgen, Love asks her husband, “Why does everyone think you’re the good one and I’m the bad one?” Later in the film we see a scene of Frances Bean’s first haircut. The child sits on Cobain’s lap while Love searches for a comb and scissors. The camera shows Cobain nodding off, and while he maintains that he is just tired, it’s clear he’s not. The scene is painful to watch, especially because those around Cobain carry on like nothing in wrong, giving the feeling this is just like any other day in the Love-Cobain household. The scene is a reminder of how the press treated Cobain’s addiction when he was alive. They just carried on like nothing was wrong, instead directing all their judgement at Love.

#courtneylove #courtney love #hole #grunge #nirvana #kurt cobain #kurtcobain #90s

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bechloeislegit · 3 years

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Save a Horse, Ride a Cowgirl - Chapter 1

A/N: First, I'd like to say Happy (Belated) Birthday, malexfaith (the actual day was April 14)! Second, I asked for an idea for a fic for her birthday, and this is one idea she sent me. It was originally going to be a one-shot, but it got away from me. (I hope y'all like it).

Award-winning singer Beca Mitchell has had a rough few months. Her bosses force her to take some time off to get herself together. They send her to a ranch where she meets Chloe Beale. They knew each other when they were children; can they be friends again or will a different kind of relationship develop?

Award-winning singer/songwriter Beca Mitchell stood in front of her two best friends, Stacie Conrad and Cynthia Rose (CR) Adams. The two women currently standing before Beca weren't just her friends; they worked for her. Stacie was her manager, and CR was her publicist.

"I'm not going!" Beca yelled at the two women, stomping her foot like a child.

"You have no choice!" Stacie yelled back. "Do I need to remind you why we are having this discussion in the first place?"

Three Days Earlier. . .

Beca hit the final note, and the crowd started cheering and applauding. Beca smiled out at the crowd as she waved and made her way off the stage.

"Beca! Beca! Beca!" The crowd chanted.

"Encore time, Beca," Stacie said.

"I need some water first," Beca said, trying to catch her breath.

"Here," Cynthia Rose said, handing Beca a bottle of water.

"Thanks," Beca said, chugging down half the bottle.

Beca wiped her face and ran back onto the stage. The band started playing, and the crowd started cheering.

Beca started singing and made her way over to the band. The bass player played a riff, and Beca was getting into it when she suddenly stopped and put a hand to her head. A loud "oh" went up from the crowd as Beca started to fall; the bass player grabbed Beca and eased her down to the ground. Several people came running from backstage.

CR yelled for someone to call 9-1-1 as Stacie hit her knees and grabbed Beca to her.

"Beca?" Stacie called her name as she lightly smacked her cheeks.

Beca did not respond, and Stacie yelled, "Someone call 9-1-1!"

"Already done," CR said as Stacie continued trying to rouse Beca.

An announcement was made asking that everyone leave the building in a calm and peaceful manner. The place emptied out for the most part; there were still a few who made their way close to the stage and stood watching what was happening. Security prevented them from getting onto the stage.

Beca came around about five minutes later, and a small cheer went up from the small crowd. They became quiet again when two EMTs arrived and made their way onto the stage, immediately going over to Beca.

"Want to tell me what happened?" one of the EMTs asked as he started to take Beca's vital signs.

"I'm not really sure," Beca said. "I was singing, and then I felt dizzy. Next thing I know, I'm waking up to this one," she points her thumb toward Stacie, "slapping my face."

"You passed out," Stacie said. "I was trying to wake you up."

"We should take her in so a doctor can check her out," the EMT told Stacie.

"I'll ride with her," Stacie said. "CR, you call Theo and let him know what's happened."

"Got it," CR said.

"I don't think I need to go to the hospital," Beca said.

"I don't care what you think you need, Beca," Stacie said, shaking her head. "I just knew something like this was going to happen."

The EMTs helped Beca up and onto the gurney. They proceeded to fasten the restraints to hold Beca securely. Stacie followed the EMTs out to the ambulance; Beca complained the entire way about not needing to go to the hospital.

"Shut up, Beca," Stacie said. She looked at the EMT and asked, "Is there any way you can knock her out again?"

"I heard that," Beca said.

"You were meant to," Stacie shot back.

Back to the present. . .

"You passed out because you were drunk and dehydrated," Stacie said.

"I didn't do anything!" Beca said, running a hand through her hair.

"Didn't do anything!" Stacie repeated. "Are you drunk right now?"

"Stacie, calm down," CR said. "Yelling at her is not helping anything."

"She is going to ruin us all," Stacie said. "I can't keep doing this with her. We're running out of favors to call in to keep her shenanigans out of the tabloids."

"I know," CR placated. "She just needs to understand that the studio isn't playing around this time."

"This time?" Beca questioned. "What did I supposedly do to make this time so special?"

"Have you totally forgotten the drunken brawl you started?" Stacie asked. "And let's not forget about the threesome thing. You're lucky you're not in jail."

"For what?" Beca asked. "We were in a bar, and they were both being served alcoholic drinks."

"Yeah, well, one of them was only seventeen," Stacie said. "The age of consent in California is eighteen. And don't think because you're a woman, you get a pass. Her parents have every right to have you charged with having sex with a minor. You're lucky they were more upset that the bartender was serving their underage daughter alcohol, or it could have been so much worse for you."

"I can't be blamed for not knowing how old she really was," Beca mumbled.

Stacie rubbed her temples and looked at Beca. "You'd better get your head on straight, or you're done."

"I'm still not going to wherever it is the studio wants to send me," Beca said. "I'm an adult, and they can't make me do anything I don't want to do!"

"Take it easy, Beca," CR said in a calmer voice. "I'm telling you this as your friend. You're under contract, so yes, they can make you do whatever they want you to."

"Wanna bet?" Beca said petulantly. "Tell the studio I don't want to go."

"The studio folks aren't asking you if you want to go," CR said, stepping into Beca's personal space. "They're telling you, you have to go. You need to take some time off to rest and get your head back in the game."

"I don't understand why," Beca said, lowering her voice and taking a step back.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Stacie yelled. "You literally passed out during the encore at your concert because you were drunk, Beca. You're exhausted, and you're making bad decisions; really bad decisions."

"Not to mention the fact that your daddy issues are becoming a PR nightmare," CR added. "I know you were hoping your dad came back it was to make amends . . ."

"I don't want to talk about him," Beca interrupted, crossing her arms and glaring at Stacie and CR.

"Okay, you don't want to talk about your dad; that's fine," CR said. "Let's talk about how the studio is considering canceling your contract and letting you go."

"What?!"

"CR's right," Stacie confirmed. "If you don't take time off, you're done. Fired. No more music. No more VIP treatment. No more one-night stands with your fans. No more making money. Are you ready for that?"

"And, if Khalid fires you," CR said. "Don't count on another studio wanting to sign you."

Beca ran a hand through her hair and stared at Stacie and CR. She let out a loud sigh.

"Fine, I'll go."

"Good," Stacie and CR said simultaneously.

"But. . ."

"But. . . what?" CR asked hesitantly.

"But," Beca said, smirking. "You two have to go with me."

"Not gonna happen," CR immediately stated. "Denise is due in two weeks, so I can't go."

"I'll accept that as a good reason for you not going," Beca said and then turned to look at Stacie. "What about you?"

"I don't want to go," Stacie said.

"If not wanting to go isn't a good enough reason for me not to go," Beca said. "It's not a good enough reason for you either. So, if I don't get a choice in the matter, you don't get a choice. Make sure you tell the studio honchos if you don't go, I don't go, and let's see what happens then."

Beca turned and left the room.

~~ Save a Horse, Ride a Cowgirl ~~

A week later, Beca and Stacie were on a private jet heading to Denver, Colorado. Beca was sulking as Stacie calmly flipped through a magazine. Neither woman spoke, and they flew in relative silence for close to two hours before Beca broke that silence.

"I can't believe you caved with the studio and are making me do this," Beca huffed. "I thought you were my friend."

"I am your friend," Stacie said, continuing to flip the pages of the magazine. "But, I'm also your manager. I love you, but I love my job more, and I'm not going to do anything to lose you or my job. So, if I have to go to Denver and babysit you, then that's what I'm going to do."

"Why exactly were we going to Denver?" Beca asked. "Is it like a spa retreat or something?"

"Nope," Stacie said, setting her magazine aside while pulling something out of her bag. She held it out toward Beca. "We're going to be spending the next three weeks at a western-style dude ranch."

"A DUDE RANCH?" Beca screeched, causing Stacie to grimace. "Whose bright idea was that?"

"Theo's," Stacie replied with a shrug.

"I should have known," Beca snarled. "That guy never did like me." Beca sighed and asked, "What the fuck am I supposed to do there?"

"You're supposed to rest and relax," Stacie said. "And they run a dry ranch, so there won't be any booze to get you into trouble."

Beca scoffed, and Stacie handed a pamphlet over to Beca.

"Read the brochure if you want to know what you'll be doing," Stacie said.

Beca took the brochure and looked through it.

"The only form of transportation on the ranch is on horseback," Beca read aloud. "The only horses I want to deal with are the ones under a car's hood."

"What part of the only form of transportation is on horseback are you not understanding?" Stacie asked. "Get it through that thick skull of yours; there are no cars, trucks, or other motorized vehicles. Just horses. I'm personally looking forward to riding again."

"Good for you! But there's no way I'm riding one of those beasts," Beca grumbled. "I hate horses."

"Just give it a shot, Beca," Stacie said. "Horses will help calm you; you're supposed to try and relax. And, you could always save a horse and ride a cowboy instead. Or in your case, a cowgirl. But only if she's over eighteen."

"Haha," Beca scoffed. "I get ridden plenty, thank you very much."

"Groupies and one-night stands don't count," Stacie said. "You need to find someone to have an adult, meaningful relationship with."

"Says the woman who calls her vagina a hunter," Beca snorted. "When was the last time you had an adult meaningful relationship?"

"We're not talking about me," Stacie said. "Plus, I'm not under contract, so what I do is nobody's business but my own."

"I'm starting to regret signing a contract," Beca said. "Almost as much as I regret hiring a friend to be my manager."

Stacie shrugged and picked up another magazine. "You know you love me."

"We both know I do," Beca said, sighing. "But would it kill you to let me live my life the way I want to?"

"Probably not," Stacie shrugged. "But, it might kill you and I'm not willing to take that chance. Believe it or not, I actually do like having you around."

Beca was saved from responding as the Captain announced, "Ladies, please fasten your seatbelts. We're making our final approach into Denver and should be landing in about ten minutes."

~~ Save a Horse, Ride a Cowgirl ~~

A van from the ranch was waiting in the hangar when the jet came to a stop. The pilot opened the door and lowered the stairway. Stacie stepped out first to find a man looking, every bit the cowboy in blue jeans, checkered shirt, boots, and hat, staring up at her from the bottom.

"Miss Mitchell?" the cowboy asked, tipping his hat.

"That's her," Stacie replied and pointed over her shoulder.

Beca gave a small wave over Stacie's shoulder.

"Nice to meet you, ladies," the cowboy said. "My name is Tom and I'll be escorting you to the ranch. I'll get your bags while you make yourselves comfortable in the van."

Stacie got into the van and watched as Beca grabbed two of the bags and placed them in the van herself. Tom grabbed the remaining bags and placed them in the back. Tom opened the driver's door, removed his hat, and situated himself behind the wheel.

"The drive will take about forty-five minutes," Tom said, looking over his shoulder at the two women. "There's water in the cooler behind you. Help yourself."

Tom turned to face the front and started the van.

About an hour later, the van turned off the main road onto a dirt road. Beca sat up and started looking around. Off in the distance, she saw several buildings.

"Looks like something from an old Western movie," Beca said.

"I love the log cabin look," Stacie said, looking around.

"Will we be staying in a log cabin?" Beca asked Tom.

"Sort of," Tom said. "All our guests stay in individual one-room cabins. The main building houses the offices, gym, game room, kitchen, and dining room. Since this is our slow time, you'll both probably be given your own room."

"That actually sounds cool," Beca said.

Stacie lowered her window, saying "Look at all this wide-open space. And smell that clean, fresh air. We're definitely not in LA anymore."

"If I click my heels three times and say there's no place like home," Beca said. "Will I wake up from this nightmare and find myself in my own bed back in LA?"

"No," Stacie said. "And I can't believe Miss I Hate Movies, just used one to make a point."

Beca let out a snort and looked out her window.

"Those things are huge," Beca said, spying two horses being ridden by a man and a woman; they looked as if they were racing.

"Oh, wow," Stacie said, leering at the couple. "The scenery just keeps getting better."

The woman's hat flew off and red hair flew out behind her. Both riders stopped and the woman said something to the man that could not be heard in the car.

Beca's eyes widened in surprise when she saw the redhead's face as she turned and trotted back to where her hat landed. She was gorgeous.

"If she can ride a horse," Beca said, pointing at the female rider. "I may just have to take up riding myself. She makes it look hot."

"She's really pretty," Stacie said, looking the girl up and down.

"She sure is," Beca mumbled. "She kind of reminds me of someone I knew when I was a kid."

Beca and Stacie continued to watch the two riders.

"He's also really hot," Stacie said. "He can park his boots under my bed anytime."

"Ew, gross," Beca said. "Try and keep it in your pants, Stacie."

"I will if you will," Stacie said, laughing. "Who does the hot redhead remind you of?"

"Someone I knew from back when I lived in Atlanta," Beca responded. "We actually met in Kindergarten and became fast friends. I'd say she was my best friend from the time we met up until we were nine."

"What happened when you were nine?"

"Didn't I already tell you about that?" Beca asked; Stacie shook her head. Beca continued. "My grandmother got sick and my mom took me with her to Seattle to help her out. I was only supposed to be gone for the summer. But, my grandma died and left my mother her house. My mom and dad were going through a rough time and my mom decided to stay in Seattle and asked my dad to come there. He chose to stay in Atlanta and promised to come to visit, but he never did. They eventually divorced."

Stacie looked at Tom and asked, "Who are they?"

"That's Chicago and Chloe," Tom said, glancing over at the couple. "Chicago's dad owns this place and Chicago runs it. Chloe is a vet and takes care of the animals on the ranch."

"Chloe?" Beca repeated. "What's her last name?"

"Beale," Tom said as the van came to a stop in front of the main building.

"Oh, my God," Beca whispered as she continued watching the redhead. "I do know her! Or rather, I did."

"Are Chicago and Chloe a couple?" Stacie asked.

"God, no," Tom said, chuckling. "Chicago is married to Jessica and Chloe is his cousin."

"Good to know," Stacie murmured, looking at Beca watching the redhead.

~~ Save a Horse, Ride a Cowgirl ~~

Beca and Stacie stood next to each other and watched as Chicago and Chloe rode up to them and hopped off their horses. A woman walked out of the main building and stood next to Chicago. He put his arm around her waist and pulled her to him.

"Good afternoon, Miss Mitchell, Miss Conrad," Chicago said, removing his hat. "Welcome! My name is Chicago Walp and this is my wife, Jessica. We run this Ranch for my dad, so if you need anything, anything at all, please don't hesitate to ask either one of us."

Chloe cleared her throat and Chicago smiled over at her.

"Sorry, Chlo," Chicago said, chuckling. "And this lovely young lady is Dr. Chloe Beale. She takes care of all the animals. She also gives riding lessons for anyone who wishes to learn."

"Please, we're just Beca and Stacie," Stacie said.

"I know who Beca is," Chloe said, smiling. "I was totes excited when I heard you were going to be a guest. I'm a big fan."

"Thank you," Beca said, looking down at the ground.

Tom was retrieving the luggage from the van and Chicago moved to help him.

"Please be careful with those two bags," Beca said, rushing over to them. "I'll take them."

Beca put one of the bags over her shoulder and pulled the other over to where Stacie was talking to Jessica and Chloe.

". . .said she'd love to learn to ride," Stacie was telling Jessica and Chloe.

"Who said that?" Beca asked. "It wasn't me. I hate horses; they're just huge, scary beasts."

Jessica and Chloe both laughed.

"Didn't you also say, if Chloe was riding that you might have to reconsider riding because she made riding a horse look hot?" Stacie asked, chuckling when Beca's face turned red.

"That's not-," Beca stuttered, looking from Stacie to Chloe and back again. "I, uh, didn't, um. Ugh! I hate you so much right now."

"It's okay, Beca," Chloe said, chuckling. "I think you'd look hot riding, too. And our horses are very tame. I'd be happy to teach you to ride and show you how tame they are."

Beca blinked a few times and stared at Chloe. Chloe looked at Beca and then at Stacie.

"I'm sure Beca would love that," Stacie said, causing Beca to snort.

"I might be game," Beca said. "If Stacie takes lessons, too."

"I already know how to ride," Stacie said, smirking. "But I'll go along with you so you don't get scared."

"Good," Jessica said. "Now that's settled, let's get you to your rooms, shall we?"

"Ladies, if you'll follow us please," Chicago said as he and Tom walked past them.

Beca and Stacie followed. When they entered the main building, Tom grabbed a luggage cart and he and Chicago set the luggage on it. Beca gently placed the two bags she was carrying onto the pile and stepped back.

"Let's get you checked in," Jessica said, leading the way over to the registration desk. "Thanks, Tom, Chicago."

"No problem, babe," Chicago said, shooting Jessica a smile.

"You're welcome," Tom said. He tipped his hat at Beca and Stacie, and said, "Enjoy your stay, ladies."

"Thanks, Tom," Stacie said, winking at him.

Tom smiled at her before turning and exiting the building behind Chicago. Chloe walked over and stood by the desk; she couldn't stop looking at Beca. Beca looked back at her, blushing and looking away when Chloe smiled at her.

Jessica got Beca and Stacie checked in and grabbed their room keys, handing them to Chloe.

"Chloe, would you like to show Beca and Stacie to their cabins?"

"I'd love to," Chloe said excitedly, grabbing the keys. "Thanks, Jess."

Jessica winked at her and Chloe walked over to the luggage cart. She looked back at Beca and Stacie.

"If you ladies will follow me," Chloe said as she started pushing the cart.

Stacie nudged Beca's shoulder when she noticed Beca looking at Chloe's ass.

"Rein it in, Beca," Stacie whispered. "A bit of discretion wouldn't kill you."

Beca blushed and moved her eyes up to stare at the back of Chloe's head.

~~ Save a Horse, Ride a Cowgirl ~~

Chloe took the cart outside and started toward a row of cabins. The path was wooden and stretched from the main building around to all the cabins. Chloe stopped at Cabin #4 and unlocked the door. She left the luggage cart outside and stepped through the doorway. Beca and Stacie followed her inside.

"This is your cabin, Miss Mitchell," Chloe said, waving an arm around the room. "Your bathroom is through that door over there."

Beca looked to where Chloe was pointing and nodded her head in acknowledgment.

"Please call me Beca," Beca told Chloe as she looked around the room.

"Okay," Chloe said, stepping back out the door. "Beca, if you'll point out your luggage I'll bring it in for you."

Chloe reached for a bag and Beca stopped her, saying, "I got it."

Beca grabbed her laptop case and another case, and took her cases over to the desk, and started to unpack them.

"No offense," Stacie told Chloe. "She's just very particular about people touching her equipment."

"Understandable," Chloe said. "I'm sure it's very expensive. What else is hers?"

"I'll help you with them," Stacie said. "This one stays here and that one there." Stacie grabbed one of the suitcases and pointed at the other.

The bags were placed near the bed and Chloe walked over to the wall, getting both Beca and Stacie's attention. She placed her hand on the thermostat and explained, "Each cabin has its own thermostat. You can control both the heat and air conditioning to your liking. It's usually mild during the day, but the temperatures drop somewhat at night. If you need an extra blanket or pillow, you can find them in the closet next to the bathroom. That's also where we keep everything you'll need for the bathroom, like towels and soap, among other things. If there's something you need and can't find, just pick up the phone and dial star zero one. That rings at the front desk in the main cabin. Someone is always there 24/7. Or you can dial star zero three and reach me; I'd be happy to answer any questions you may have."

"Thank you, Chloe," Beca said.

"Stacie," Chloe said, tearing her gaze away from Beca to look at Stacie. "You'll be right next door in cabin #5. The rooms are set up in the exact same way. Do you have any questions? Or need anything?"

"I'm starting to get a bit hungry," Stacie said. "What time does dinner start being served?"

"Oh," Chloe said as she walked over to the desk and pulled a folder out of the drawer. "There's a weekly schedule of activities and a menu for all meals inside this folder. It's updated every Sunday night. I know tonight we're having a barbecue with all the fixin's. You'll get a chance to meet some of the staff as well as the other guests." She glanced at her watch. "Aubrey will probably be ringing the dinner bell shortly."

"Who's Aubrey?" Stacie asked.

"She's my best friend," Chloe responded. "She's also the cook. You'll love everything she makes; I know I do."

"I'd like to unpack before dinner," Stacie said. "Beca, I'll swing by and get you when the dinner bell sounds. Okay?"

"Okay," Beca said. "I'll unpack and freshen up a bit."

"Great," Chloe said. "Here's your room key. We have a master key to all the rooms if you should lose or misplace it."

"Thanks again, Chloe," Beca said, taking the key.

"Stacie," Chloe said, turning toward her. "Let's get you to your room."

Stacie followed Chloe out the door. She took a deep breath. "Something smells good!"

"It's the meat from the grill."

"Whatever it is, it smells delicious."

"The meats are great, but it's the sides that make the meal for me. I'm sure Aubrey made potato salad, pasta salad, as well as a vegetable salad. Corn on the cob and baked beans for sure, and several desserts."

"Sounds like quite the feast," Stacie said.

Chloe pushed the luggage rack to the next cabin and helped Stacie take her bags inside.

"Here's your key," Chloe said as she handed the key to Stacie.

"Thank you, Chloe," Stacie said.

"You're welcome. I'll see you and Beca at dinner."

Chloe left and was surprised to see Beca looking out her door.

"Did you need something, Beca?"

"I was wondering if you had a minute?"

"Um, sure."

Beca stood aside and let Chloe enter the cabin. Chloe walked over to the desk chair and sat down.

Beca started pacing back and forth. Chloe watched her for a moment.

"So, um, what can I do for you, Beca?"

~~ Save a Horse, Ride a Cowgirl ~~

About ten minutes after Chloe left her, Stacie was startled by a sudden loud clanging sound. Realizing it must be the dinner bell, she laughed quietly to herself and shook her head.

It was only a few minutes later that Stacie grabbed her room key and left her cabin. Beca and Chloe were coming out of Beca's room as Stacie reached it.

"Oh, hey, Chloe," Stacie said, surprised to see her. "I wasn't expecting to see you with Beca."

"Beca wanted to know about the riding lessons," Chloe said. "You two have a lesson tomorrow morning at ten."

"We do?"

"I told you, Stacie," Beca said. "If I'm going to take lessons, so are you."

"And I told you, I already know how to ride," Stacie said. "Besides, will you even be up before ten?"

"Don't worry about me," Beca said, glaring at her. "I'll be up in plenty of time."

Stacie ignored Beca's glare and looked her up and down.

"Loving the cowgirl look, Beca," Stacie said. "I'm guessing you only brought your plaid shirts and jeans without knowing you'd end up on a ranch."

"I think she looks adorable," Chloe said, causing Beca's cheeks to redden.

"I'm not adorable," Beca mumbled.

"She does love her plaid shirts and jeans," Stacie said.

"What's wrong with that?" Beca asked. "They are good for any occasion."

Stacie snorted as she looked out over at the tables that were set up for the cookout.

"That looks like a lot of food," Stacie said. "How many guests do you have?"

"Including you and Beca, we have eight guests," Jessica's voice said from behind them. "And all the staffs' meals are provided. Come with me and I'll introduce you to some of the other people who work here."

Beca and Stacie followed Jessica and Chloe over to the huge grill that was being manned by two of the cowboys.

"Guys," Jessica calls out, getting their attention. "I'd like you to meet some VIPs that will be with us for the next three weeks."

The two men turned to look at Beca and Stacie. One had dark brown hair and was a couple of inches taller than Stacie; the other's hair was a lighter brown and he was about Stacie's height. They both have boyish faces and grinned at the two women.

"I know her," the taller of the two said, pointing toward Beca.

"No, you don't," Beca said, shaking her head. "He doesn't."

#bechloe fanfiction #beca mitchell #chloe beale

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