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#sometimes that means i miss really good posts unfortunately
blanketforcas · 8 months
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i think what saves me from a lot of discourse is that i'm simply Not Reading All That
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astonmartinii · 1 year
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Heyy! Can I request more vettel insta AU? Honestly I have no preference for the reader I just enjoy reading vettel a lot because of how less we get to see it but I'm happy to discuss suggestions 🤩 hamilton y/n + roscoe, charle's sister anything really
family ties | sebastian vettel instagram au
pairing: sebastian vettel x leclerc!reader
seb may be retiring, but he's not gone from the paddock completely, though the reason is not exactly what you'd expect
ynleclercart
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liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly and 110,067 others
tagged: sebastianvettel
ynleclercart: it's been a rollercoaster of a ride but i am beyond grateful to have been able to design helmets for such an icon of the sport. seb will always be missed on track, but if he ever wants to return, he knows where i am <3
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user49 noooo can people stop posting their goodbye posts for seb i'm still in denial
sebastianvettel no one else i'd rather work with, thank you for always supplying the beautiful lids
ynleclercart always - come visit soon
sebastianvettel i'll be there
user12 ^^ this is just digging the knife deeper PLS DON'T GO SEB
charles_leclerc what about your loving and devilishly good-looking brother?
ynleclercart eh, seb is better
user35 most iconic leclerc and it doesn't even come close
ynleclercpriv
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liked by charles_leclerc, sebastianvettel and 31 others
ynleclercpriv: sometimes babygirl is a fully grown man who hikes in his free time
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charles_leclerc tell him if he comes to monaco i'm shaving it
ynleclercpriv over my dead body charlie
charles_leclerc that can be arranged
sebastianvettel thank you for the compliment (?) my love, charles stop threatening her or i shall have to intervene
maxverstappen1 get his ass seb
ynleclercpriv max why are you involved in our family domestic?
maxverstappen1 idk seemed fun
sebastianvettel can we all go back to the original point of the post - admiring me?
f1gossipandtea
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f1gossipandtea: seb spotting!! anon sent me this picture of recently retired sebastian vettel in monaco of all places. why do we think he's there?
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user45 my king is looking so good, retirement unfortunately suits him
user10 my sebchal heart tells me that he was there to see charles but it's not likely :(
user09 no let's be delusional
user22 i saw a post that he was later seen with a woman??? a girlfriend mayhaps?
user49 pls no i can't take retirement and a girlfriend in a month
sebastianvettel added to their story
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[caption: had to commission the best in the business - thanks y/n]
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ynleclercpriv
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liked by sebastianvettel, pierregasly and 35 others
ynleclercpriv: goofing around in the wilderness
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sebastianvettel it's not goofing, we're serious hikers
ynleclercpriv sure we are and i'm also a professional boxer
maxverstappen1 y/n can you get seb to come back? it's a shit show here without him
charles_leclerc i agree with him for once
ynleclercpriv lmao they gagged ur ass @lewishamilton
charles_leclerc y/n i'm being serious !!!! he'll listen to you if you ask
sebastianvettel i can literally read all of this
maxverstappen1 so you'll come back?
sebastianvettel nope
sebastianvettel
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liked by ynleclercpriv, charles_leclerc and 702,088 others
sebastianvettel: vacation and all that jazz
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user78 seb using instagram like a normal person after retiring, my prayers were heard
charles_leclerc you're 1000% going to be a crunchy dad
sebastianvettel i don't know what that means but i don't think a person can be crunchy
charles_leclerc that's exactly what a crunchy dad would say
ynleclercpriv don't try and trick him with online terminology
user30 i love the domestics in this comment section i didn't know the leclercs and seb were that close
user40 call me a conspiracy theorist all you want but that's defo y/n leclerc
f1gossipgirl
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f1gossipgirl: another seb spotting, the german made a surprise appearance in melbourne... and in a ferrari jacket. our sources say that he was accompanied by a woman but he wasn't seen again other than his entrance. do we think seb will watch from ferrari? does he have a new job? does he have a girlfriend? what do you think?
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user10 omg he's so mysterious but like i need him to be straight up with me right now
user39 my brain: he's probably just there to support, my heart: seb for ferrari team principal
user88 omg imagine seb as team principal helping charles win a championship
user67 so someone commented on seb's post that he might be dating y/n leclerc (charles' sister, seb's old helmet designer and artist) and that would make sense that he'd accompany his gf to support her brother
user11 omg the thought of charles and seb being brother-in-laws
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ynleclercpriv
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liked by sebastianvettel, charles_leclerc and 35 others
ynleclercpriv: forgive me friends but i am so in love with this man
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charles_leclerc believe me we know
sebastianvettel i love you too honey 🍯
pierregasly where did you get the last photo... asking for a friend
ynleclercpriv it's from norbert - you snooze you lose pear
maxverstappen1 omg parents
charles_leclerc STOP
sebastianvettel i'm not sure we're your parents but yes you can come visit for christmas
charles_leclerc wait i thought we were coming this year
ynleclercpriv more than one family can come at a time - grow up charlie
sebastianvettel
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liked by ynleclercpriv, charles_leclerc and 1,023,566 others
sebastianvettel: doing melbourne right
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user45 sebastian... you don't know what a soft launch is
user13 he's an influencer now baby
charles_leclerc i thought social media was stupid ?
sebastianvettel let me appreciate the love of my life in peace
charles_leclerc okay romeo
user19 the last two posts + charles commenting on every post + seb being seen in the paddock IN A FERRARI JACKET = i'm losing my mind
redbullracing can't wait to see you tomorrow champ!
user48 they're fuming he's being seen with ferrari
f1
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liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly and 772,303 others
tagged: scuderiaferrari, charles_leclerc & sebastianvettel
f1: a familiar face back in the ferrari garage! seb made his return to the scuderia in melbourne surrounded by former coworkers and the leclerc family.
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user48 AND THE LECLERC FAMILY ??? they know what they're doing f1 admin is a seb x y/n truther
liked by f1
charles_leclerc he loves me too much to stay away for too long
ynleclercpriv *us
user38 YALLLLLLLLLLL
user97 i need them to confirm it i love them so much
user21 the way y/n has commented - her account is priv but there's over 1,000 posts HOW MUCH OF IT IS SEB PLS GIVE US THE CONTENT
ynleclercpriv i don't kiss and tell xoxo
charles_leclerc
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liked by ynleclercpriv, sebastianvettel and 1,304,778 others
charles_leclerc: congratulations on officially joining the leclerc family seb!! thank you for putting up with me and i expect great birthday and christmas presents xx
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sebastianvettel of course you spoiled this, i love you but you are an unfortunate by-product of my relationship with y/n
user23 CONFIRMATION
pierregasly CHARLES NO
danielricciardo CHARLES NO
landonorris CHARLES NO
maxverstappen1 CHARLES NO
ynleclercpriv YOU FUCKING MORON CHARLES I'M LOCKING YOU OUT
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sebastianvettel
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liked by charles_leclerc, ynleclercpriv and 2,134,677 others
sebastianvettel: happy engagement to the love of my life, your brother may have spoiled it, but i'm prepared to deal with his annoying ass if i get to be with you for the rest of my life. you make life worth living and i can't wait to explore the world with you x
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user39 when will it happen for me god?
charles_leclerc I'M SORRY I LOVE YOU GUYS THOUGH
maxverstappen1 bagsy flower boy
danielricciardo pleasse let me plan the stag
aussiegrit congrats seb!!
christianhorner congratulations seb and y/n
ynleclercpriv i love you so so so much seb, i'm so glad i met you. you've changed my life and finally showed me what love truly means x
note: omg this post has posted so many times unfinished im gonna lsoe my mind
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ja3yun · 4 months
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The Moon That Sometimes Shines | L.HS (TSTAB Alt. Scene)
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lee heeseung x reader
warnings: smut (mdni), fingering, dirty talk, choking, pet names (baby girl, angel), alcohol, slight exhibitionism, if I missed anything lmk!
wc: 3.6k
synopsis: after seeing your ex-lover jaeyun and his fiance being close to one another, heeseung offers you a much needed distraction.
a/n: i accidentally deleted the original post so here I am at 3am re-uploading it :( anyway like i said the first time, this is part of the tstab series original plotline before i changed it but can be read as a stand-alone one-shot since this is an alternative scene.
tstab masterlist
“Y/N! Hurry up, we’re going out tonight.” Eunseo’s pretty voice travels through the door. After confirming it was her you open the door and look at her confused. “Me, you, Heeseung, Jake, and Yeoreum are going out. Like a joint bachelor-bachelorette thingy.” She claps excitedly. 
“Didn’t they already have their parties? You got really stressed when the inflatables you planned went to your elderly neighbour.” A chuckle leaves your lips as you recall the incident. The delivery of nonsensical blowup dicks and penis straws went to Mrs. Kim, a 87-year-old lady, who lives next door to Eunseo and she, unfortunately, opened it. Their relationship was never the same.
Eunseo scowls at the thought, “Please don’t remind me, she thinks I’m a sex pest or something now.” Her hand raised to stop you from saying any further as she carried on, “But this is just to let loose. After that walk and shit, I think they need it.” Nodding you agree and she smiles, “Then get ready! I’ve looked out your fit.” That could only mean one thing: you were going to be cold tonight.
After getting dressed you trail behind Eunseo you walk into the living room to find the rest waiting for you both which seems to be a theme this past week. Eunseo apologises like she always does and then hurries everyone as if she isn’t the reason the taxi fare is already up by £20. 
Heeseung puts his hand on the small of your back, leaning down to whisper, “You look so fucking good, angel. If there wasn’t such a thing as bro code…” he trails off and leaves it there with a cheeky smile. To be honest you felt hot, probably the hottest you have in any of your best friend’s clothes. She had looked out a black corset top with lace detailing at the side, a white mini skirt with perfectly placed black bows on either side of your hips, and black thigh-high boots that were not the easiest to get on. This outfit called for your hair to be curled and eyeliner so sharp that it could open envelopes.
Nudging him you laugh and keep walking, “You couldn’t handle it.” You playfully sway your hips and Heeseung pretends to fall to his knees, a hand clutching his chest. When little moments like this happen, the world suddenly feels like it’s aligned.
The taxi drive is short, and full of chatter and excitement. Yeoreum and Jaeyun seem to have made up, her laughter and his hand on her thigh being your indications. 
The club is busy, filled with people your age and younger just trying to get drunk. Thursdays are always the best day to go out; it’s cheaper and has a more student-based clientele than on a Saturdays when creepy men in their 40s come out from the shadows. Eunseo flashes her signature smile and you guys are let in without any hesitation. You look at her skimpy outfit and think that might have helped the situation.
Music and heat hit you all at once and it’s overwhelming but in the best way possible. The musky smell of alcohol and smoke from the machines feels like a time machine back to your second year of college, a mixture of shame and fondness washing over you as you remember the many hook-ups and walks of shame you did.
Eunseo grabs your hand and raises it as she leads you to the bar to get the first of too many drinks tonight. She orders two double vodkas with lemonade and two Baby Guinnesses, they've become your favourites over the years. As the bartender goes to make them she turns to you, “Are you going to make your move on Heeseung tonight?” A loud sharp laugh leaves your mouth at her question, she really wasn’t letting this go.
“Eunseo, he isn’t my type I have told you this.” The shots come first and you clink it on the bar and shoot it down. “He’s hot but I’m not interested.”
“Those two sentences don’t go together, babe. And what’s one night? You’ve been with plenty of uglier men than him.” Her eyes are on Heeseung at the other side of the bar, buying drinks for him and the bride and groom. 
“I don’t know,” Of course, Heeseung was attractive, even more attractive now than 4 years ago. His perfect nose, attractive side profile, and when he smirked…god when he smirked. But could you truly do that to Jaeyun? 
Your drinks are now in front of you both, “Come on, let’s dance.”
One hand holding your drink and the other holding Eunseo’s hand you lead her to a spot and start to move your hips to the music, letting all the tension you’ve felt go. A genuine smile creeps on your face and you down your drink. And another. And another.
Everyone was enjoying themselves and as your eyes land on Yeoreum and Jaeyun, you realise just how much fun they’re having.
Jaeyun’s hand is caressing her thigh, his tongue lapping up her mouth, and her tits are pressing into his chest. If you were closer you swear you could hear them moaning.
It’s hard to watch, your true love tangled in someone else, but that’s reality now.
Your view is obstructed by a broad chest clad in a loose My Chemical Romance t-shirt. Heeseung.
“What did I tell you about only focusing on me, baby girl?” His hands find home on your waistline and pinch them slightly to get you to look up at him.
“It’s hard, Hee” You confess, eyes glazed from the alcohol and forming tears. It was pathetic how upset you got over Jaeyun and Yeoreum considering you were the reason they found each other. If you hadn't left it would be your mouth smothering him with kisses.
Heeseung’s hands soothe over your hips, applying pressure the closer he gets to your ass. “I know, angel. It’s so hard to see someone you love with someone else.”
His eyes are staring deep into yours as if he’s confessing something to you. 
What you don’t know is that back in school Heeseung was infatuated by you. The way you spoke, the way you laughed, the way you kissed. Whenever you kissed Jaeyun he would see how your tongue would move with his best friends and wish, no, pray that it was his just once.
He didn’t want forever, he just wanted once.
Once just so he could taste you. Heeseung knew you would always belong to his best friend, there was no doubt. Even back in the day he wouldn’t ever come between you. 
But it isn’t like those days anymore. You aren’t Jaeyun’s and Jaeyun isn’t yours. 
Obviously, he felt guilty for even conjuring up such an image of you and him but as you stare up, eyes glistening and hazed he can’t help but push the guilt to the back of his mind. 
“Angel, only look at me from now on, okay?” He shouts it loud enough for you to hear over the club music. 
Is it just you or have his lips gotten bigger over the last few years? 
“Something on my face, Y/N?” 
Oh. You’re staring at him. Yet you can’t stop. His smirk is spiraling you into a tizzy, his tongue poking just enough to lick his bottom lip. Maybe it’s the alcohol talking but you want to kiss him. Really badly want to kiss him.
Instead of responding, you lift your hands to his chest, splaying them over each of his pecks. He’s so toned under the t-shirt you can’t help but squeeze subtlety.
Bringing his lips down to your ear he whispers, “Want a distraction, baby girl?” 
God yes
Heeseung’s breath is hot in your ear and the wetness of his lips is just barely touching your lobe. It’s driving you crazy. But…Jaeyun.
“What abou-”
He cuts you short when his teeth nibble the shell of your ear before he speaks, “Shhh. Told you I would help you this week didn’t I?” You can feel his smile widen as his lips ghost down your neck.
Shutting your eyes you try to focus on your breathing. Is it wrong to indulge in this? Jaeyun is over there with his fiance kissing and touching her, so why do you feel guilty for wanting to do the same with Heeseung? 
Because it’s his best friend you say to yourself.
“C’mon, Y/N. I’m sure if I touched your pretty cunt right now I’d feel how much you want me.” There’s a stir in your stomach as he utters the words into the base of your neck.
Honestly, until now your brain had been so wrapped up in overthinking you hadn’t noticed how wet you had gotten. Somehow from the moment he touched your hips, your pussy pulsed, wishing his hands and mouth were all over it. 
Heeseung’s head lifts and his eyes look into yours just like before, this time they’re filled with desire. He’s begging for the green light, the okay go, to prove his theory right.
And you give him it.
You allow him to touch you somewhere he has been dreaming about for years with a single nod. Sneakily, his hand reaches down and his middle finger runs over your soaked underwear. You bite your lip as he applies some added pressure to your clit. 
“I was right, baby girl.” His arrogance in this situation is only adding fuel to your fire, “You’re fucking soaking. Is it all for me?” 
You can’t look him in the eye out of sheer embarrassment because how did he get you so worked up like this so quickly? The only other person that has been able to do this is Jaeyun.
Leaning down so his lips hover over yours you can tell he’s holding back from kissing you despite his finger literally sitting atop your clit. “Answer me.”
“Yes.” It comes out breathy and needy. “For you.”
Heeseung closes his eyes. There is no going back if he kisses you right now and he knows it. “Tell me to kiss you.” His eyes don’t open but the way his hand massages your cunt you can tell he’s desperate, “Please, baby girl.” 
Instead of words, you reach up to kiss him and let go of all inhibitions. Your actions cause Heeseung’s hand to move away from your vagina and back to gripping your hips firmly.
He inhales deeply while he kisses you like he is trying to use all his senses. Tasting you, hearing you, touching you, he is taking you all in. The only thing he wasn’t doing was looking at you, his eyes shut from the pleasure but he knows how you look because every time you kissed Jaeyun he memorised every detail of your face.
Heeseung’s hands grabbed your ass and you moaned from your throat while his lips still attacked yours, the noise sounds like music to his ears and it just makes him more eager to keep going. The alcohol running through his veins pushes him to his next action.
“Jump.” He instructs and you obey, jumping so you can wrap your legs around his waist. Even the feeling of you like this was heaven to him. He genuinely wished he could have gotten to you first all those years ago but he’ll settle for right now. “You listen to me so well,” Heeseung whispers against your lips and that’s when he sees you’re too far gone with lust to even care what he’s saying. Your kisses get more needy as he carries you to the back of the club.
The on-lookers have faces of disgust as you practically dry hump Heeseung all the way to a dark area in the club but you don’t care, you don’t even notice because all you can focus on is the aching radiating from your core and how his mouth molds perfectly to yours.
“Fuck, angel, you don’t even give a shit if people watch, hmm?” He’s mocking you and all you can do is whimper and ask for more. 
Perching you up on a shallow shelf-like surface attached to the back wall you instantly spread your legs open and he slots himself in between, deepening the kiss. Heeseung’s 6” stature towers over you even when you’re sat on a high surface. He always loved how small you looked when you stood next to him.
His left hand is now lost in your hair making a mess of your once neat curls and his right was keeping you steady on the ledge. Pulling away he looks at your state, “You look so fucked out and I haven’t even started yet, baby girl.” Your skirt has turned into a belt due to it bunching up, leaving your whole bottom half exposed. Well almost. Your thin white panties are the only thing keeping you decent, and Heeseung needs them gone. 
Luckily, the club is so dark and no one can see your uncovered core as Heeseung yanks them down your legs and holds it in front of you with one finger. “I can keep these, yeah?” Before you can answer he’s shoving them in his pocket. In the morning you would be mad because they’re your favourite pair, but right now you couldn’t care less. 
Just like before his middle finger glides in between your folds collecting your juices but as fast as his digit was on you, it was off again, bringing it to his mouth and sucking on it. You can’t properly see his face but you can see how his eyes roll back, “I would eat your little pussy so good if it wasn’t so obvious what I was doing.” He didn’t mind people watching but if he could avoid it he would, and being on his knees with his face buried between your thighs would certainly draw attention. 
“Hee,” Your voice is a whisper but he just hears it and leans down, “Please make me forget.”
Ah. Jaeyun. He almost forgot that’s why you agreed to let him do this. To distract you from his best friend and your broken heart. Guilt and a little something else fill Heeseung’s heart but he quickly pushes the thoughts to the back of his mind when your hand is palming his cock. 
Throwing his head back exposes his adam’s apple and quick as lightening your mouth is on it, kissing it softly. “Jesus fuck, Y/N.” He huffs and his hands push you away, leaving you confused. “I need to touch you, baby girl, I gotta hear those sweet moans, or else I’ll go crazy.” Granted, he’s going to go crazy either way, whether it was from you touching him or him touching you, but he is aware he probably doesn’t have a lot of time and he can’t let this opportunity to make you cum slip from him. “Be good for me angel.” 
One single kiss on your forehead and then he’s giving you what you want. Two of his fingers are teasing your entrance, rubbing circles gently around it. “Can you take the two of them or want me to start with one?” Heeseung might have been clouded by desire but he also wants you to be comfortable, not pushing you too far. 
“I can take it.” You don’t care if you actually can’t, you just need to feel something.
“Of course you can, baby girl. You’re so good.” His words of affirmation are similar yet different to Jaeyun’s. He’s more firm with his words than your ex-lover, like he’s making you think you’re taking the lead but in actual fact, he’s always in charge. “Going to let me make you feel good? Forget about him?”  All you can do is nod and crane your neck up to kiss him but he pulls away and raises his eyebrows, “Not going to ask? After I’ve been so kind to ask you if I can touch you?”
All while he’s speaking down to you, his fingers are still teasing your entrance. He doesn’t stop, that is another difference between Jaeyun and him. When Jaeyun teased you he would stop altogether and have you mewling for him to go back to what he was doing. But Heeseung knows it pays to play the long game, give you a constant taste of what he could offer, and make you beg for something you were already getting. It got him off so much to know his partners needed not what he could give them, but what more he could do to satisfy them. 
“C-can I kiss you.” 
“Yes, you can, angel.” And then without a breath, you’re kissing him, his fingers keeping their circular motions at an agonising pace. “How hard was it to ask, hmm?” He smirks and you could slap him for being so hot and annoying all at once if you weren’t so desperate.
You go to speak but moan instead as he puts some pressure down below, “Huh? You want to ask for something else, angel?” He didn’t have time to be doing this but it was so fun to watch you like this. 
“Can you..” This is so embarrassing. When was the last time you asked for someone to finger you? “Can you fuck me…with your fingers?”
“Would be my pleasure, baby girl.” His middle and ring fingers slip inside you with a little effort, “Jesus, angel, how long has it been since someone fucked you?”
“4 months.” Not that you were counting but it was 4 months and 3 days. If you knew the time right now you could probably pinpoint the exact hours and minutes too. You were so busy with finals for Uni and work you didn’t have the time to indulge in your needs. That was probably why Heeseung was having such an effect on you.
Probably just because it was Heeseung in general.
He’s fucking you open, stretching you out so good you can’t help but grab his band t-shirt for more stability. “Hold my shoulders, it’ll be better.” It’s like you’re his lap dog the way you just follow all his instructions. You mumble an ‘okay’ and grip his shoulders tight. Once he feels you get more secure, he goes harder.
Almost like he is trying to feel every inch of your insides his fingertips pushing hard against your upper walls, just how you like it. As he feels your forehead resting against his chest he knows he’s got you. “You like it when I fuck you like this with my fingers?” and you nod, but that’s not what he’s looking for. His free hand grabs your jaw and forcefully lifts your head to look at him, “You know I need to hear you.” God, he is so hot. 
“I love it, Heeseung.” Your winded words make him smug. 
“You want to ask for anything else?” The grip on your jaw loosens and the back of his hand and fingers glide smoothly over your neck. Again here he is making it seem like you’re in control but you know exactly what he wants, “Anything at all?” 
You almost can’t get the words out because he’s curling his fingers deep inside you, “Ch-”
“I’m sorry, baby girl I didn’t catch that?” He’s so self-satisfied with himself that he's getting everything he ever wanted. 
“Choke me.” 
And just like that his strong hand is wrapping around your throat, squeezing just enough. Heeseung knows the test the waters of your limits but honestly, you don’t have any, none that you know of anyway. 
Heeseung’s hands feel different from Jaeyun’s, stronger, just like his words. The tightness of his hand cutting off your airways makes your eyes roll back and spine arch. “So beautiful, angel.” 
The sweet words leaving his mouth don’t match up to his tight grip. Your head hits the wall sharply as he pushes you back but it only adds to the sensation of pleasure you’re feeling. 
“Hee, m’gonna cum.” It’s not so much a warning because you’re cumming around his fingers. His digits hammer into you, the muscle in his arm ripples as he gives you all he has. Heeseung wants you to remember this he’s going hard and cutting off your air. 
You’re such a beautiful sight.
“Doing so well for me, angel.” His pink glossy lips replace his hand on your throat as he kisses you where he knows there will be bruises. “So fucking beautiful.”
As your chest heaves and lungs gasp for air, you realise this is the first time you haven’t thought about Jaeyun. Mission accomplished, you suppose.
“Heeseung?” 
“Yeah, pretty?” His hand retreats from your pussy as he stands back up to loom over you again.
“Thank you.” Biting your lip you want to say more but you don’t exactly know what to say. 
His fingers tap your mouth, indicating for you to open it and you answer his silent command and open wide. The next thing you know he’s shoving his fingers into your mouth and you taste yourself. This is a new experience for you and you’d be lying if you said you didn’t love it and hope it isn’t the last time you’re sucking your cum off someone’s fingers. And if it happened to be Heeseung again, you definitely wouldn’t say no. 
“Remember this whenever you think about him.” He starts staring deep into your eyes, “And if you ever need a refresher, you know what room I’m in.”
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streetlight11 · 4 months
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I Will Always Love You
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Summary: You have known each other for years and practically watched the other grow up thanks to living right next door. Nobody knows how you both truly feel except for yourselves. Now that you're in your mid twenties, you felt the need to put all that childish acts aside and finally acknowledge that feeling you've both kept in your hearts for years
Theme: neighbours au, friends to sort of enemies to lovers
Genre: slowburn, smidge of angst, romance, fluff
Warnings: mentions of alcohol, drunk, slight tension, snowed in briefly, slight anxiety, mild language
W/C: 10k
Pairing: Lee Minho x Fem!Reader
a/n: Happy New Year everyone! 🎉 May 2024 bring peace, health, happiness and success to you all 🩵 Thank you to those who follow my account and for liking my writings that I've posted thus far! To many more writings and ideas this year 💃🏽
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You and Minho go way back. You practically grew up with him since he was indeed your neighbour. It’s impossible to split you up with him back in kindergarten and the first few years of primary school. Both of you were like two peas in a pod, even your close friends and classmates knew about your very close friendship with him. Despite his odd personality that just screams Scorpio and his peculiar love for dark humour, you seem to adapt to him really well that not many people can do. Unfortunately, halfway through primary school, his friends started to separate you from Minho.
They would hang out with him before you could find him after school, they would call you multiple different names saying you’re clingy, they would embarrass you by saying you only stick under Minho’s arms like a leech wherever he went. And the worse part is, Minho did nothing to defend you. He did nothing to stop his own friends from bullying you like that.
That was the reason why you slowly distanced yourself from him since his friends would literally shoo you away like you were a peasant.
Eventually, you grew a dislike of him for what he did, even up till this day where you were both turning 25 in September and October. The thing is, you both still lived with your parents which means you still see him everyday just that he lives a completely separate life from you. Your sister however has moved out long ago since she got married.
No doubt, you miss being close to him.
Those times where you would laugh and play catch with him in his backyard. When you’d cry in his arms when someone in kindergarten steals your crayons. Where you would stay up with him past bedtime, writing whatever you wanted to say to each other on drawing blocks and showing it to the other at your bedroom windows that were facing each other. How he would walk with you to and from school, wanting to act like the bigger one since he’s a boy when in reality, he’s 27 days younger than you. Minho was your best friend but that’s just it, isn’t it?
He was your best friend… Not anymore…
Both of you grew up really well thanks to puberty and deep down, Minho couldn’t lie that you still look the same except you’ve gotten prettier. Your fashion sense is still somewhat boyish but not as bad as when you were younger, where you just wore big shirts and ¾ trousers. Now, you’ve worn dresses and skirts a few times for special occasions but you always wore jeans.
Sometimes you go for a feminine outfit with skinny jeans and crop tops while on some days you go for oversized shirts or hoodies with baggy cargo pants or jeans. And you are never a heels girl, only for special occasions. Most of the time, you are seen in sneakers and it suits you a lot. He’d be damned but he agrees that you look the best in sneakers.
You look a lot more confident in sneakers compared to heels. The only thing is, he’s been hiding a big secret from everyone including his parents that he doesn’t plan on revealing it to anyone anytime soon. Minho can lie to everyone but he cannot lie to himself. Seeing you grow up before his eyes, watching all the good and bad times you go through, seeing how puberty did its magic on you and witnessing how different of a person you are now in terms of personality, Minho couldn’t help but fall in love with you.
Unfortunately, his ego is too high for him to easily admit that so he chose to keep that a secret from everyone and act as if he still doesn’t like you.
It is a rainy Saturday evening and your friends Changbin and Chan came over earlier to study and do your assignments together with you. Changbin drove here while Chan rode his motorbike and since the weather wasn’t that great, your mother insists for them to stay for dinner or at least until the rain stops. You were in the kitchen, helping your mother prepare the food and plates on the dining table when they both offered to help. Your dad was out working overtime so it’s just you and your mother at home with your two friends.
She then asked you to text your dad saying there’s food at home and he doesn’t have to buy it after work. You remembered your phone was in your room so you rushed up the stairs to find it. A few minutes passed and you still haven’t come downstairs. Mothers being mothers, she gave the boys a sympathetic smile before she asked either one of them to go check on you.
Changbin nodded and left as Chan stayed behind to help scoop out the beef stew into the bowl. Meanwhile, Changbin softly approaches your room to see where you are. When he saw you by your vanity table where your phone is charging, he tiptoed over to you who was standing with your back facing him.
You were busy texting your best friend Lily when suddenly, a strong muscular pair of arms wrapped around your waist to surprise you. You gasped softly from surprise, glancing to your right to find Changbin’s grinning face just staring back at you.
“What’s taking you so long, dummy?” He asked, earning a laugh from you.
“I was texting Lily. Why? Missed me already?” You teased him knowing there was no effect on him because he is already happily in love with his best friend and boyfriend, Felix.
“Of course, I always miss you.” Changbin said, nudging your cheek with his nose playfully.
He finally lets go of you and leaves the room with you hand in hand. Both of you completely missed the way someone witnessed all this from across your bedroom window in the dark. You came back downstairs to have dinner with everyone, only for your dad to come home when you were halfway done with your meal. Hours passed and you were in your bedroom with your friends when Chan stood by your window to look at the night sky. Suddenly, his words caught your attention.
“Hey Y/N, is that your neighbour you told us about?” Chan asked while staring at something downstairs. You got out of bed and walked towards him only to follow his trail of sight. Sure enough, you saw Minho playing catch with his cats. If you remember correctly, they were Soonie, Doongie and Dori. You naturally smiled at the sight of him playing with his cats.
“Yeah…” You simply said before Changbin frowned at you with a question in mind.
“Wasn’t he like your best friend at one point?” He asked, making you sigh and walked back into your room to sit on your bed.
“He was…”
“Then what happened?” Chan asked as he now sat on your study chair, curiously waiting for your reply.
“We… grew apart.”
“There must be a reason why you grew apart, no? I mean, if you two were really close friends, you wouldn’t wanna grow apart from each other… Unless something happened that made you choose that path.” Changbin said and you immediately felt upset.
“We used to be inseparable. He never told me he wanted me to give him space or anything and he simply stayed close to me too wherever we went. Until our third year in primary school, his friends started calling me names and said I was always clinging onto him like a leech. He never said anything to defend me or stop his friends. Ever since then, I slowly distanced myself from him because of his friends and he never apologised so I just decided to forget about it.” You finally explained to them the full story.
“I’m so sorry…” Chan said, making you smile despite the tears threatening to fall.
“It’s okay. It’s not your fault.” You said as they both looked at each other and Changbin decided to drop the bomb on you.
“Hey, do you mind if I ask you something?”
“Sure. What is it?” You asked as you waited for his reply.
“Do you miss him?”
You fell silent for a while, not knowing how to respond. Your mind screams no but your heart screams yes. It’s difficult to choose one answer but you knew deep down, which is the right answer you’ve been holding onto all these years.
“I do…”
They chose to drop the topic and talked about the plan next weekend to hangout at the club. They soon left to head home after saying and hugging you goodbye at your doorstep since it was no longer raining. That night, before you went to sleep, you walked over to close your window and turn on your air conditioner when you saw Minho cradling Soonie in his arms as he entered his bedroom. You quickly closed the window and drew the translucent curtain over to cover your window while you peeked to see him.
Minho kissed Soonie’s nose as he nuzzled his face into her body. She licked his nose a few times before he placed her down on his bed and soon walked over to his window. You quickly hid behind the wall, afraid he might see you. If only you knew the reason why he actually went to his window, you wouldn’t have moved away that quickly.
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A week later, you were just getting ready to head out with Chan and Changbin while your parents were out for their anniversary dinner. You wore a pretty lavender body fitting dress that stops about two inches above your knees. Changbin texted you saying he was already on his way to your house in a cab, together with Chan. Knowing they would reach in just 5 minutes, you decided to head downstairs and waited there instead. You had just locked your front door when the sound of a door closing followed by keys jingling made you turn to your right.
There, you saw Minho leaving his house as well. He was wearing a black silk dress shirt with the first few buttons undone, the sleeves of his shirt rolled up to his elbows, tucked into his light washed denim skinny jeans and a pair of mens boots. His hair was styled up to show his forehead and bangs to fall and frame his face.
He looked sickeningly handsome. You’re almost jealous of it.
“Does mommy know you’re sneaking out of the house?” Minho asked as he came next to you who was just leaning on the short brick wall that separates your house yard from his.
“I don’t need to sneak out because they know where I’m going.” You said with a soft scoff.
“Mmm, so they’re aware that you’re going out wearing something like this? Naughty girl…” Minho teased you with that charming smirk on his face.
“I’m 25, Minho. I can wear whatever I want.”
“Technically, you’re still 24.” He’s right. You still have four months till your birthday but who cares.
“You’re so annoying.” You whispered to yourself as you saw a taxi gradually slowing down towards you. When the vehicle finally comes to a stop in front of you, the two heads that popped out from the windows made you relax. It was Chan, Changbin and Felix. You entered the cab without saying anything else to Minho, ignoring the way he was keeping his eye on you even after the cab had driven off. One thing he completely forgot to do was to compliment you on how pretty you looked tonight.
Half an hour later, you arrived at the club and soon got out of the vehicle with your friends. You managed to enter the club since the queue wasn’t that long and made your way to the bar to get your drinks. You stayed by Chan the entire time since Felix was with Changbin. That night, you had no idea why but you just felt like letting loose and drinking however much booze your body can take.
Minutes ticked by and you were now on your 7th shot of tequila. You were clearly drunk but not enough to drop dead unconscious. Chan was talking to you about this girl he met on this dating app and was just listing out all the things he liked about her when you suddenly dragged him to the dancefloor. He danced with you with no sense of awareness of your surroundings. Everyone else was just as drunk as you, dancing their hearts out letting their limbs move to the beat.
You were too busy swaying your hips to the song when someone slips in front of you and takes your hands in his gently. Your vision was hazy as you found it difficult to keep your eyes open. The person danced with you, bringing your hands up over his shoulders and dropping them there while his hands rested on your lower back comfortably. For some reason, you felt like the touch was very familiar.
The music was drowning you, wanting to just focus your vision on the person you’re dancing with. Just then, he leaned down to say something in your ear, loud enough to hear over the booming music.
“You’re very drunk.” He said, your mind was running amuck.
“I know.” You giggled but he kept his lips by your ears, not wanting to pull back and let you see his face.
“I should take you home.”
“N-No… Take me to your home.” You giggled as you tangled your fingers in his hair softly to play with it.
“I don’t think you will like that, Y/N.”
Oh, he knows your name. This must be Chan… right?
He then guides you towards the entrance, only for you to panic saying you need to tell your friends that you’re going home and all that so they wouldn’t get worried. But instead, he told you to do that in the cab to avoid you from falling down. Not long after, the cab came and you entered the vehicle with him. During the car ride, you ended up falling over with your head in his lap. You fell asleep with your left arm stretched over the seat while your right hand gently held onto his thigh for support.
The next thing you knew, you woke up the next morning in your bed with a really bad hangover. And yet, the memories from yesterday still lingers in the back of your mind and the mysterious guy remains unknown. Later in the afternoon, you went to make a group call with Chan and Changbin and they picked up your call with ease.
“Hello?” You asked into the line and they both replied at the same time.
“Hey. What’s up?”
“Were any of you guys with me last night at the dancefloor?” You said and you could hear both of them humm in thought.
“I was with you briefly when you dragged me to the centre but I don’t really remember anything after. I was really drunk.” Chan laughed.
“I was with Lix the entire time. So I’m clearly out of the picture.” Changbin giggled as you heard a shuffle from his end but then it stopped.
“Because I was dancing with someone and he sent me home last night. I thought it was one of you guys.”
“Definitely not me then.” Changbin said and so did Chan.
“I don’t think I was sober enough to even send myself home…” Chan said lightly but then he paused. The line fell silent and he spoke up again, “But if neither of us sent you home, who did? And how would they know where you live?”
He does have a great point.
“That’s what I’m confused about. How would a stranger know where I lived? Unless it’s one of you guys?” You asked as your brain began to search for ideas on who it could be. All but one was suddenly missing from your list by accident.
“Maybe it’s your sister!” Changbin said only for you to scoff in disbelief.
“It was a guy! And why would my married sister be at a club when she has a pair of twins to take care of?” You asked, only for Chan to laugh out loud and tease the other male in the call.
“Maybe it’s your cousin?” Chan asked but you knew it wasn’t a relative. Just then, Changbin mentions someone you completely forgot about.
“What if it’s him?”
“Him… who?” You asked in a slow pace, hoping he wasn’t talking about who you’re thinking.
“Your hot but ex-best friend neighbour?” You can’t believe he said it.
“No… No, it can’t be. How would he know I was there? That’s impossible.”
“Probably he just happened to be at that same club. That is the only club in this area anyway…” Chan suggested, making you frown. What if it’s true? That’s the only logical explanation as to how the person knew where you lived and knew your name. If it wasn’t any of your friends, it couldn’t have been a total stranger. But why? Why would he do that when he clearly didn’t have to?
This isn’t making any sense…
Nevertheless, you made an excuse saying you needed to help your mom run some errands so you ended the call. That night, you were just sitting by your window staring at the beautiful starry night sky when you saw Minho enter his room. He paced around his room with a deep frown on his face. Just then, he took you by surprise as he grabbed the hem of his hoodie and pulled it over his head, leaving him shirtless for you. A soft gasp left your lips as you quickly closed your window before he saw you.
Little did you know, right after he took off his hoodie, he heard the sound of your windows being closed so his gaze naturally flew across the room just in time to see you lock your last window and disappeared into your room. Minho chuckled quietly to himself as he went to take a quick shower. After he was done, he laid in bed staring into his ceiling with the same scene just repeating over and over again in his head.
The way you danced with him last night, the way your fingers tangled into his hair, the way you fell into his lap, the way you slept the entire car ride back home, the way he carried you into your home and all the way to your bedroom, the way you unconsciously whined when he pulled away from you, the way he took the chance to gently caress your cheek while whispering the words he never dared to say to you in person now, the way your lips looked so soft and kissable but he had to restrain himself from doing something while knowing you were drunk.
Minho pushed all those thoughts to the back of his mind, hoping he’ll forget all about it as the days go by. Wanting none of that to bother him because if it does, he would probably come knocking at your doorstep and tell you how he truly feels about you. Clearly his ego would be crushed by that so he chooses not to.
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Months had passed and it was your birthday today. Your parents invited your sister’s family, your friends Chan, Changbin, Lily and also Minho’s family over to the house for your birthday celebration. It was just going to be a private birthday party for you. You wore a pretty blue semi flowy dress to match the theme of the decorations. Your mother knew you loved blue so that’s why the decorations were all blue in colour. With the right amount of food and desserts she ordered, you can’t wait to have a good time. The only thing is, you were kind of hoping Minho would come.
You missed him a lot but you weren’t sure if he feels the same towards you. Nonetheless, those thoughts were thrown out of the bus the minute your friends arrived. The party started after 3pm and your friends came just one minute after 3 so you got distracted really fast. As the hour went by, your sister, your brother in law and your twin nephew and niece finally came. You greeted them warmly while your brother in law handed you a gift bag.
“Happy birthday Y/N! Your sister and I picked this out for you so we hope you like it.” He said, making you laugh.
“Thank you! I just hope it’s not something weird.” You joked and they laughed. Your niece and nephew hugged you to say hello and wish you a happy birthday before they went to greet your parents. A few minutes later, your doorbell rang again so you went to see who it was. Surprised to see Mr and Mrs Lee standing there with a gift bag and a box filled with home baked cookies.
“Happy birthday dear. Here’s your birthday present and the cookies you loved to eat when you were younger.” Mrs Lee said, making you giggle.
“Aww Mrs Lee, you shouldn’t have…”
“It’s okay my dear. Today is your day.” Mr Lee said as you welcomed them in. Though you did feel a little sad that Minho wasn’t here with them, maybe he really doesn't care about you anymore. You joined your friends in your living room as they played with the twins. Just then, Changbin spoke up from beside you.
“He didn’t come?”
“No…” You said but somehow, he could tell your tone was off.
“Were you hoping he’d come?” He asked softly, not wanting to upset you in any way possible. Your silence was enough for him to apologise even though he knew it wasn’t his fault. Changbin rested his hand over your knee and gently caressed it to comfort you and it partially worked. Hours passed and you were just playing with your niece when the doorbell rang.
“Y/N sweetie, can you go and see who that is?” Your mom called from the dining table where the adults were eating and chatting. With that being said, you nodded and got up to see who it was. Maybe your mom ordered something she forgot about. As soon as you pulled the door open, you froze at the sight of someone too familiar standing at your doorstep. Minho glanced down at your attire before meeting your eyes and he gave you a little smirk.
“W-What are you doing here?” You asked rather softly, unable to calm your nerves.
“What does it look like? I came to celebrate your birthday… And also have free food.” Minho said as he took a step forward while you took a step back. Minho smirked at you cheekily before he tapped the tip of your nose with his finger and whispered, “It’s good to see you again.”
The minute he walked in, your parents greeted him with so much love. Your mom hugged him tightly and he embraced her as though she was his mother. Your mother asked him to make himself at home and just take whatever food he wants, only for him to thank her. Meanwhile, you glanced over to your friends and both Changbin and Chan looked at you with shocked eyes.
The twins greeted Minho warmly as he lifted your niece on his waist while your nephew ran to take his favourite stuffed animal and bring it to Minho.
You’ve never seen him mingle around with kids before, not really knowing what to expect considering he’s an only child. So to see him being greeted warmly by kids who basically met him for the first time, it’s making your heart tingle. To avoid looking obvious, you quickly went to sit next to Changbin while Lily and Chan were talking about school. Your friend looks at you worriedly but all you did was smile.
“Are you okay?” He asked, making you nod.
“Are you sure?” He asked again, knowing you damn well that you’re not anywhere near okay.
“Yeah! I’m okay.” You smiled as you watched Minho get dragged by the kids to play with them together with Chan and Lily who were seated by the toys. Every now and then, Minho would glance at you and you’ll look away as though you didn’t mean to look at him.
Minho’s lips would unconsciously curl upwards slightly without making it obvious that he’s smiling at you. The sun was starting to set and your mother was preparing the candles for your cake. You were just in your room, charging your phone and also wanting to get away from the whole awkward situation downstairs for a bit when a familiar voice speaks up from your bedroom doorstep.
“I thought the birthday girl should be downstairs mingling with her guests?” He asked as you turned around to find Minho leaning against your doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest. Why does he look so fucking handsome tonight in just a plain black shirt and jeans?
“I was just about to head back down.” You said, avoiding his gaze as you turned your back to him once more. Minho carefully walked over to you while keeping the conversation alive.
“Really? You don’t seem like you are going to move any time soon though.”
“I-I have to send an email for my school work.”
“For 10 minutes? Yeah right.” He said as his voice sounded a lot closer now. You turned around to say something to him but instead, you flinched back when your arms accidentally crashed into his chest. A soft gasp left your lips when he smirked down at you charmingly.
“U-Um… We should go downstairs.” You said as you slipped past him to head towards the door but Minho caught your wrist and tugs you back slightly to stop you from walking.
“Hey… I just-” Minho’s words get stopped when your sister’s voice echoes down the hallway.
“Y/N? Minho? Come on! It’s time to cut the cake!” She suddenly appears by your door only for Minho to let go of your wrist gently so she wouldn’t question anything. Soon, all three of you went downstairs but while you were about to head to the dining table where the cake was lit, Minho spoke up, earning a frown from you.
“I have to go. I just remembered I need to submit my essay tonight and I still haven’t finished it yet.” Minho said as he bowed to your parents and was about to walk out of the house when you reached for his hand in yours and tugged him back gently.
“N-No, please… Don’t go?” You whispered with a shaky breath. Minho could’ve sworn he saw tears, his heart broke seeing you tear up but he couldn’t just hug and kiss you right there even if that’s all he could think of. So instead, he reached up to hold your face with his right hand and gently caressed your cheek with his thumb to comfort you.
“Happy birthday Y/N.” He whispered softly as he turned and left without looking back. You stood by the door as Chan came over to take you in. Not before he rested a gentle hand on your lower back and comforted you as best as he could.
“Come on… He’ll come around soon. You know he will.” He said, only for you to sigh. Throughout the night, you weren’t as happy as you were a few hours ago. From time to time, you kept glancing over to the house next to yours. Your friends could tell that your mind was somewhere else so they decided not to stay long. But before they left, they made sure to hug you tightly and Lily didn’t forget to say something sweet to you.
“If he’s meant for you, he will come back. Only idiots would be dumb enough to not choose you as a partner.” Lily said, making you giggle lightly. That night, you couldn’t help but feel sad thinking about how Minho slipped away from you yet again. You were just curled up in bed when there was a soft knock on your bedroom door.
“Baby? Are you still awake?” Your mother asked as she opened your door. You hummed to respond, hearing her walk closer until she was right behind you.
“Oh, my sweet baby. Come here.” She said while climbing into bed, only for you to immediately throw yourself in her arms and cry. She held you in her arms securely while you cried your heart out.
“I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”
“I-I never said this to anyone before… b-but I-I miss him…”
“I know, baby. I’m sure he misses you too… Just… Give him some time to figure things out. I’m sure he’ll come around.” She said, hoping you’ll feel better. Thankfully, you calmed down with her words so you stopped crying and she kissed your forehead before tucking you into bed.
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It’s been 2 and a half months now since your birthday party. You didn’t celebrate Minho’s birthday simply because his parents told you he was out of the country with his friends for his birthday. A part of you knows he was just trying to avoid you and so his parents couldn’t throw a party for him only to invite you. Just last week, your parents told you about their plan on going for a staycay with the Lee’s family for the holidays. Apparently they’ve already booked the accommodation which is a beautiful wooden lodge up in the snowy mountains.
It was only after they told you that you remembered it was your friend’s wedding on the day they planned to leave for the mountains. Unfortunately for you, it seems like you have no other choice but to go the next day instead. How you would make your way to the mountain, that’s your task to do some planning at least you can join them on the trip anyway. Your sister and her family would be going too but they’re all leaving on the first day morning but you had to stay behind.
Today was the day where your family and his, had already left to go to the lodge up the mountains while you’re here preparing for your friend’s wedding. Hours prior to leaving the house, you made sure to pack all the clothes you need for your trip so that you wouldn’t be rushing tomorrow or tonight knowing you’ll be back way past 7pm despite the wedding reception starting at 1pm. It was one of your old friend’s wedding from college. Her name is Roseanne and she is considered one of your close friends.
You wore a pretty turquoise boat neck dress that stops a few inches below your knees, pairing that with a simple pair of black open toe heels. Your hair cascades down your shoulder and back in soft straight waves.
When you arrived at the wedding venue, it was very beautiful. The colour scheme for the wedding decorations and the altar is just spectacular. Since you were there alone, you didn’t really know anyone there except for Roseanne’s sister and parents. Time passes by so fast, you don’t even realise it was almost 10 o’clock now. You knew you needed to head home and get your rest since you planned to leave early in the morning tomorrow.
With that being said, you bid her family goodbye and made sure to meet Roseanne and her newlywed husband to say your final congrats before leaving the venue. You called a cab and it came as soon as you called. The drive back home seemed shorter than the drive to the venue earlier, maybe due to less traffic at night.
Nevertheless, you paid the cab fare and got out of the vehicle after saying thank you. The cab driver soon drives off while you went inside your house and locked it.
You let out a tired sigh as you dragged yourself up the stairs to your bedroom. You turned on the lights and walked over to your vanity table beside your bedroom window. Taking a quick glance, you saw that his bedroom was dark. You wondered what he could be doing there at the lodge with your family.
With a soft sigh, you combed your fingers through your hair and brought it up to hold it in place with your claw clip. You began to remove your makeup with your makeup wipes while blasting your favourite tunes. Luckily you already packed your clothes and necessities. A few minutes later, you just left the bathroom down the hall when your phone started ringing. You glanced down to see your mother’s caller ID on your lock screen so you answered it.
“Hello?” You said into the line.
“Hi sweetie. Have you packed your bags?”
“Yeah. I’m just bringing my luggage and my sling bag.”
“Great! Anyway, there seems to be a change of plans. Minho is actually home right now and he planned to drive up the mountains tonight so he would reach here tomorrow morning. Since you’re both at home, why don’t you go with him tonight? He just got off the phone with his mother and he said he’s okay with driving here with you.”
Minho’s not with them?
“Oh… Uh… Sure, I guess.” You said, sounding a little unconvincing to her and she laughed.
“Alright dear, just be downstairs before midnight, okay? I love you baby.”
“Okay mom. I love you too.” You said before ending the call.
Great… What better way to have a reunion by spending a 6 hour drive with him. This is gonna be awkward…
Nonetheless, you did what was necessary before midnight rolled around. It was finally midnight in a blink of an eye and you were just locking your front door when you heard his voice speak up from behind you.
“Didn’t think you’d be left behind as well.”
You turned around to find him strolling towards you in his sweatpants, hoodie with his oversized shirt peeking underneath it and a long windbreaker jacket over it. His hair was damp and fluffy so you’re assuming he just got out of the shower and yet, he still looks good.
“Wedding bells were calling me. What about you? Why aren’t you there with them already?” You asked as he took your luggage from you and placed it in his car boot and proceeded to close the door. Once you were both inside his jeep, he started the car and drove off smoothly not forgetting to answer you.
“I had to retake my exam today. I suck. I know, okay? Don’t judge.” He said, making you raise your hands in a surrender position. Minho’s lips curled up into a cute smile that made you look out the window to avoid his gaze.
For the rest of the drive, both of you got quiet. He focused on driving while you were dozing off after a tiring day. Minho never held a grudge against you for sleeping while he had to sacrifice his sleep and stay awake to drive. Although, he does tend to glance over to his right to check on you but it leaves his heart fluttering every time he does that. It’s been nearly 4 hours since the drive and as he got higher up the mountains, the snow was beginning to get heavier.
Cool air seeps through the car gaps, causing you to stir awake from the sudden drop in car temperature despite the heater already turned on. You glanced up to see the car completely covered in snow while a thick windbreaker was placed over your curled up body in the passenger seat.
“How much longer till we reach the lodge?” You asked tiredly as you peeked the time on your phone screen.
“Another 2 hours, give or take.” He said while keeping his eyes on the slippery road. There’s no way you can make it to the lodge in this weather. With how heavy the snow was falling, it could be a snowstorm coming your way pretty soon. So to avoid any unfortunate events, you knew it would be the best decision to stop somewhere and wait till the morning to continue your journey. Upon having this thought, you noticed there was a hotel lodge just a few metres ahead.
“Stop there. We can’t go any further in this kind of weather.” You said as Minho drove to the open parking lot at slow speed due to the piled up snow covering his tires and almost 6 inch tall snow that was covering the ground. Once you were parked, both of you felt a little worried considering it’s now or never.
“Leave our luggages here. We’re just here to let the night pass anyway.” He said, making you frown even though you knew he had a point.
With that being said, both of you struggled to get out of the car but you still made it to the lodge safely as he clicked the lock button on his key. You entered the lodge first with him following behind you and there were quite a number of families there too and it looks like they’re snowed in as well. Minho approached the counter where a man was seen a little overwhelmed by the new guests who showed up.
“Hi, can I know why are all these people gathered here?” Minho asked, only for the man to politely smile and answer professionally.
“They’re just here for shelter since the weather forecast for tonight isn’t that great. There is a high chance that we will be stuck here tonight. Really sorry for the unfortunate situation.”
“It’s fine but uh… do you guys happen to have a spare room for us to rest in for the night?” Minho asked as you simply watched quietly beside him. You’d usually butt in and argue back with whatever decisions he’s making but tonight, you’re too tired to function.
“We do have a small room but there’s only one bed and our heaters are not that strong due to the horrible weather. We can’t fix it until tomorrow when the mechanics are open. Will that be okay?” The man said, giving Minho the chance to look at you to see how you feel about the suggestion.
“Why are you looking at me?”
“Didn’t you hear what he just said? There’s just one bed and the heater isn’t working well. Do you still want the room or not?” He asked.
“At this point, I don’t even care.” You sighed tiredly only for Minho to give the man a shrug of his shoulders.
“Fine. We’ll take it.” Minho said as he then made the payment for the room. A few minutes later, you were both sent to your room on the third level. You thanked the worker as you entered the room after Minho who was now holding the door for you. As expected, the room was just barely warm with the cold air still surrounding the room completely. You were in three layers of clothing and yet you’re still shivering. The first thing you did after taking off your shoes was to climb into bed and bury yourself under the thick covers.
You were just curled up on one side of the bed when you felt the mattress dip with his weight. Minho pulled the cover up so he could also bury himself in it. He laid on his back while you laid on your side with your back facing him. The room was silent as nobody said anything but with the subtle shifts and movements, you knew that he wasn’t asleep.
“Should’ve asked for an extra blanket. It’s still so cold…” He whispered as he shifted a little closer to you when he felt the nice warmth radiating off you.
“I just hope the weather gets better later. But right now, all I need is sleep.” You said as you buried your arms closer to your chest to keep yourself warm. Silence fills the room again but you were still shivering and Minho could feel the bed vibrating softly from it.
“You know what? Fuck it. I can’t sleep like this.” Minho said as you wondered what he was going to do next.
Just then, you didn’t expect him to shuffle towards you until you felt his chest pressing against your back while his left arm slid over your waist and reached for your arm. He slips his hand into your right hand, lacing his fingers perfectly with yours before tangling his legs with yours underneath the covers. Your heart was racing rapidly in your chest now, afraid to make the slightest of sound and movement. But Minho calms you down by caressing your hand with his thumb, feeling his soft lips press on your neck.
“Are you still cold?” He whispered quietly against your neck, making you let out a very soft whimper before saying no.
“Good.” He replied to you, holding you closer right after. This kept you warm and you both eventually managed to fall asleep.
A few hours later, you woke up feeling comfortably warm and fuzzy. You let out a soft moan as you stirred awake, feeling something soft brush against your forehead. When you manage to open your eyes, that’s where you realise the sleeping position you were in. Minho was laying on his back with you resting your head on his chest.
Your left hand was tucked between your bodies while your right hand was lacing fingers with his that was hanging past your shoulder. Minho stirred awake when he felt you let go of his hand only to slide up his chest and stopped on the side of his neck. You stayed like that even when you felt his hand glide up and down your right forearm softly.
“This feels nice…” He said quietly, not really expecting a reply from you. Your heart swelled knowing he was talking about being this close and comfortable to you once again after years.
“We can stay like this for a while more…” Your voice was almost a whisper but thankfully he heard you. Because the minute those words left your lips, you felt him press the sweetest soft kiss to your forehead. Minho couldn’t stop himself from cracking a smile against your skin, knowing you probably felt it.
“I wouldn’t wanna let go anyway.” He said ever so softly, making you blush. With that being said, you snuggled deeper into his chest. Trying to ignore the urge to kiss him right there. About two hours later, you finally got out of bed and headed back down to resume your journey to the family lodge. Neither of you mentioned the cute little cuddle session simply because you were too shy to address it in the car and even when you arrived at the lodge a few minutes past noon.
Everyone asked you and Minho about what happened last night and where you’ve been, so you told them everything. All until the cuddling part. They were just glad that you both made it to the lodge safely so you could finally enjoy the holidays in the snowy mountains.
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Throughout the next two days, you were enjoying yourself a lot on the trip. From the activities to sightseeing to homemade food and to family bonding. This has probably been the only time you saw just how fun Minho truly is and how loving he was towards your sister’s children. The twins are already 9 years old and yet, Minho seems to win both their hearts. Maybe including yours too.
It was the last night of the family trip, all of you were gathered around the christmas tree when your parents began to give out gifts to their kids and grandkids. Followed by Minho’s parents giving him his presents. You got a few pretty tops from your parents while your sister got you a beautiful necklace with a simple heart charm. Just then, Minho’s mother held out a wrapped present to you with a bright smile on her face.
“Merry Christmas, sweetheart. This is a gift from us that Minho helped to choose. We hope you like it.” She said, making you thank her while taking the gift from her. All eyes were now on you as the kids wanted to help you unwrap so you let them do that. Once the present was revealed, a soft gasp left your lips when you saw the brand of the box. It was a shoe, not just any shoe though… It was your favourite shoe brand.
You carefully pulled the cover open and peeled the paper back only to gasp out loud this time. It was the exact shoe that you wanted to buy for yourself the other day but was prioritizing your expenses to only buy what you need.
“I love it… I wanted to buy this a few weeks ago but I didn’t…” Your voice grew softer with every word until you were now looking at Minho.
“I noticed you like shoes. So I just gambled and picked the one with a baby blue accent. Didn’t know you wanted this exact one though.” He said, making you giggle.
“Well, thank you for the gift then.” You said with a smile, earning a laugh from him.
An hour later, everyone was starting to disperse to head to bed but you weren’t sleepy yet. You bid everyone goodnight but you stayed seated against the couch facing the fireplace. You were just admiring the shoe when a familiar voice caught your attention.
“Be careful not to burn the shoe.” Minho said as he approached you with a teasing smirk.
“Of course I won’t. I’m not that clumsy.” You replied to him while putting the shoe back in the box and pushing it under the tree, away from the fireplace. Minho took a seat on the couch as you got up and plopped down beside him.
“But really though… Thank you for the gift.” You said, earning a soft smile from him. Both of you fell silent, blankly staring at the fireplace instead of each other. You were so close to removing yourself from the room, thinking he probably feels awkward with you here now that you’re alone again but he spoke up before you could run away.
“I’m sorry…” He said very quietly while staring into the fire.
“What are you sorry for?” You asked over a whisper, finally turning to look at him. Minho kept his gaze ahead but you saw the sadness lingering in his facial expression.
“For everything? I’ve hurt you a lot and only now do I have the balls to apologise.” He chuckled but it wasn’t a happy one.
“It’s okay. I forgive you.” You said with a smile on your face, ignoring the tears that were threatening to fall. After what felt like hours, Minho finally turns to you with the deepest frown you’ve seen on him. He took his time boring his eyes into yours in search of something unknown to you.
“Why?” He asked and you were confused.
“Why not? That’s what friends do, no? They forgive each other…” You said easily only to go speechless when his eyes grew wide at the word ‘friends’. This was already pretty obvious where he got caught up and it doesn’t make sense to you. Sure you haven’t really been doing friend stuff with him for years but you still consider him your friend, even though deep down you want him to be something more.
“Friends?” He whispered out as a question so you couldn’t help but giggle lightly to brighten up the mood slightly.
“Yeah? Okay fine, technically we’re neighbours. Does that sound right to you?” You asked, only for him to finally crack a smile. This simple sight has undoubtedly awoken the butterflies in your stomach.
Both of you fell silent briefly, not really sure how to continue the conversation. You stared at your hands in your lap, picking on your cuticles out of anxiety and he noticed.
Minho could never stand seeing you having anxiety. The cuticle picking, shaking legs, fidgeting limbs and all he wants to do is to hold you close and tell you that he’s there with you. He takes this opportunity to calm you down and by that, he reaches one hand up to hold the side of your face and turn it towards him. Once you were facing him, you felt him caress your cheek with his thumb as he slowly leaned in. Partially scared that you might just pull away from him and embarrass him.
Your heart was palpitating rapidly in your chest, not really sure where this is going. Just when you feel his nose brush against the side of your nose, a familiar voice calls out to you very softly from behind Minho.
“Auntie Y/N? Can I sleep with you?” Your niece asked as Minho pulled away from you just in time for your niece to settle herself in your lap.
“Of course, baby. Come on, let’s get you to bed.” You said, turning her around to carry her in your waist while you stood up. Minho stood right after you but before you walked off, you cupped his face with your right hand and placed a gentle kiss on his cheek. Minho froze seeing you smile up at him only to then carry your niece to your room. That night, he slept with a smile on his face even though it was just a kiss to his cheek.
The next day, it was time to go back home. Since Minho drove there, he and his parents took his car while you followed your family car together with your sister’s family. Both of you never spoke about last night to anyone, not even to each other. The drive back home was filled with sleep and occasional laughter. When you arrived back home after sending your sister to her house, you made your way to your room to unpack and shower since it was already 8pm.
You had just finished showering and entered your room when you saw Minho shuffling around his room shirtless with damp hair falling down his head. Of course he looked handsome as ever but at least now you don’t have to quickly hide yourself from him to avoid him seeing you.
So instead of doing that, you continued doing what you planned on doing and that was to wear your clothes and unpack.
Minho stole a few glances into your room through his window as well but you didn’t seem to look over so he never waited for you anyway. He’s just happy that you’re no longer mad at him. That’s already a great start for him to redeem himself and maybe redo his friendship with you.
Besides, that’s all you both wanted with each other… To finally be friends again and possibly more.
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It's been a few days now since the trip, yet neither you nor him have spoken to each other. Today is new years eve and you didn’t really have plans for midnight. Changbin was going to celebrate new years with Felix, Lily has a party to go to that was hosted by her friends in high school while Chan is out on a date with the girl he’s been talking about lately. It’s 2 hours to midnight and you were just lounging in bed, scrolling through your twitter when your mom came to your room with a bright smile on her face.
“Hi darling. You’re not going out with your friends tonight? It’s New Year's eve…” She laughed softly but you shrugged your shoulders as a response.
“Nope. All my friends already have their own plans. And besides, it’s just new year’s.” You said proudly, earning a smile from her.
“Well, in that case, why don’t you get ready. Someone’s here to take you out to see the fireworks.” She said, making you frown.
“Who?”
“Get ready and you’ll know.” She said before kissing your forehead and left the room. With that being said, you quickly changed into a thin sweater, a hoodie over it, ripped jeans and pinned your hair up in a claw clip. You opted to just fill your brows, put on chapstick and wear your contact lens on to avoid wasting time. Once you were sort of presentable, you took your phone and left your bedroom but you definitely weren’t prepared for when you arrived downstairs. There by your couch, was Minho leaning against the back of it with his arms crossed over his chest.
He was chatting with your dad and he looked so fucking handsome as always. Minho was wearing a simple white long sleeve with black and light grey flannel, a hooded leather jacket, skinny black jeans with his hair down completely not styled and yet he still looks good. When you finally reached the base of the stairs, both of them glanced over to you and you felt shy under his gaze.
“H-Hey…” You started and Minho couldn’t help but chuckled softly at your reaction. You dad smiled at you two, telling Minho to drive safe as he gave the boy a hug. You went over to hug your parents and soon left the house with Minho. The minute your front door closes, you spoke up to him in urgency.
“You didn’t tell me you were going to drag me out tonight?” You asked, earning a laugh from him.
“It was meant to be a surprise. I guess I’m just lucky that you’re home tonight.” He said casually.
He soon started the car and drove off into the night. You have completely no idea where he was taking you but after a while, you sort of have a clue since the drive was leading you to the highest point of town where the famous lookout point was. The drive to the location was filled with singing and laughing, not really having a proper conversation. When you arrived at the lookout point, you had about an hour left till midnight. Minho parked his car to the side of the road a few metres next to the railing.
“Do you wanna stay in the car or sit outside?”
“Let’s sit outside. The night sky looks really pretty tonight.” You smiled and he nodded to your suggestion. He locked his car and you both walked over to climb over the railing and sit on it facing the lookout point.
“Wow… I’ve never been here before.” You said as you took your time to admire the view. The starry night sky, the city lights, the wonderful view of the city at this time of night.
“I always come here if I need time alone. It calms me, weirdly enough.” Minho said, earning a nod from you.
“I can totally understand why. It’s beautiful up here.” You said while looking out into the city before you. At that moment, there’s nothing more beautiful to him than the sight of you here with him after years of missing you. Both of you chatted with each other and catched up with a lot of things you missed in one another’s life. When Minho realised it was almost midnight, he got up and told you he wanted to take something from the car. You let him be as you continued to stare into the night sky.
A few minutes later, you realised you had a minute left until midnight. You were just staring blankly at the city lights when Minho’s voice caught your attention.
“Hey, let’s stand. My ass hurts from sitting there too long.” He said, making you laugh. You did as he said only to join him behind the railing. Without any thoughts in mind, you stood facing the lookout point, only to hear everyone else around that area do a countdown. Naturally, you smiled as you hugged yourself.
10…
9…
8…
7…
6…
5…
4…
“3.” He said.
“2.” You said.
“1…” You both said at the same time as everyone else yelled into the night, “Happy New Year!” At that exact moment, fireworks were brought to life as they exploded into the night sky in colourful arrays of sparks. You gasped at how pretty they looked, not regretting leaving the comforts of your bed for this. Just then you thought the night couldn’t get any better, a warm hand slips around your waist as you get turned around.
When you finally turned to the side, Minho slid his left hand onto your face and without any words exchanged, he locked lips with you. His heart was beating so fast as his hands shook from both the cold and his nerves. You smiled against his lips as you slid your hands up his chest and wrapped them around his shoulders. Minho was so scared that you would shove him away or slap him for being bold but he never thought you would kiss him back. You allowed him to pull you closer against his front, snaking both arms around your waist to secure his hold on you.
His lips were too addictive, you had to force yourself to pull away to breathe. Keeping your face close to him, you tangled your fingers into his soft hair while you held his face with your other hand and caressed his cheek with your thumb softly. Minho’s heavy breaths mixed with yours as he squeezed your waist a little before he spoke up very quietly despite the loud explosion behind you.
“I’ve missed you so much… I regret letting you slip away due to my ego. But I will never regret loving you from the day we met.” He paused as you stared into his eyes lovingly and you could tell that he was nothing but genuine.
“Y/N… I love you… I will always love you.” Minho whispered against your lips and that was all it takes for you to break into tears. You couldn’t help but bury your face in his shoulder, feeling him hug you tighter while caressing your back. He let you cry into his shoulder, never once letting you go or loosening his hold around you. Eventually, he guided you towards the car until he could sit on the hood with you in between his legs.
Once you’ve calmed down, you pull away from him to wipe your tears on the sleeves of your hoodie. Minho laughed at you but he too helped with wiping your tears away using his thumbs. When you’ve stopped crying, he holds your face in both hands and gently tilts them up to meet his eyes. As soon as you finally locked eyes with him, Minho gave you the sweetest smile you’ve ever seen before he kissed you once more.
You melted against him, resting your hands on the nape of his neck as he pulled back to gently say, “I mean what I said just now.”
Minho isn’t the kind to easily convey his feelings let alone show it to anyone. So for him to confess to you right now is a big step he took and he wasn’t going to regret it no matter what your answer is. You wanted him to know how you feel so by pulling him in for another longing kiss, Minho smiled knowing your answer was already pretty obvious.
“I love you too, Minho.” You whispered against his lips, earning a chuckle from him.
“Good because I would dig myself a hole if you didn’t.” He joked, making you giggle. That night, you stayed out with him for a few hours before he sent you home. You ended up cuddling in the back seat of his car, talking about anything and everything you could think of. You came back home feeling so happy and full. Who knew this day would come. You’re just glad you never fully gave up on him.
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mountttmase · 4 months
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Winter Sun - Chapter 1
Note - I can’t tell you how excited I am to finally post this 🙊 it’s honestly one of my favourite things I’ve written and I really hope you love it. I wish I could find the original anon who inspired this but I hope you all love it 🩷 feedback is appreciated as usual 😘
Pairing - Mason Mount × Reader
Word count - 6.6k
Warnings - series will contain fluff, smut & angst
Masterlist
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‘Thanks for saving me in there, Mase’ you smiled as you squished yourself in the back of the taxi. Whoever thought it was a good idea to order a 7 seater you had no idea but Mason managed to steady you as the pair of you sat practically in the boot.
‘Don’t worry about it. It’s like a jungle in there sometimes, they look like animals on the hunt. Makes my skin crawl’ he laughed, his body turning to face yours slightly in order to give you a bit more room before you slung your legs over his. ‘You alright there’ he chuckled, his warm palm pressing to your thigh but you just gave him an enthusiastic nod.
‘Perfect’ you winked before the car finally jolted forward.
‘You two got enough room back there?’ Ben asked from in front of you, turning in his seat to check on you both before your best friend, and Ben's girlfriend, Carly turned to face you too.
‘Just about’ you laughed before they turned away, leaving you and Mason to talk amongst yourselves.
‘I’ve been meaning to complain to you actually’ Mason started, his hand is travelling down your leg to massage the soft skin of your calf. ‘Why haven’t I received any baked goods delivered to my door recently?’
‘Because I’ve been selling out’ you laughed, catching on to his impressed expression before he shrugged. ‘Christmas is my busiest time of year’
‘Well you need to make me extra then’ he winked, causing you to chuckle. ‘Christmas is over now anyway’
‘Two weeks ago yeah’ you laughed. ‘Don’t worry I’ve made you something extra special for your birthday’
‘Cute’ he laughed but you didn’t miss the subtle bite of his lip. ‘Can’t you still make me some of those Christmas tree brownies? I like those’
‘Thought Christmas was over?’ You told him, brows raised as you tried to use his words against him and you could tell by the twinkle in his eyes he was enjoying your teasing.
‘You know if I could live in your bakery I would but unfortunately I have a job myself’
‘Well that’s just not a good enough excuse really is it?’
‘I guess not. You wanna be my sugar mumma in more ways than one then yeah?’ He joked, causing you to roll your eyes before laughing loudly. The joke was unexpected coming from him, considering you were only friends and he never spoke to you like this but you also knew he was as cheeky as they come and Mason always liked to make a joke about the name of your business no matter how much he told you he loved it.
Sugar Mumma was a concept you’d dreamt up at school. Wanting to put your baking talents and love of sweet treats to good use, you’d always wanted your own bakery and two years ago after lots of grafting and selling your bakes from home, you’d finally been able to open your own shop.
It wasn’t anything huge, but it was yours and you loved it more than anything else.
Mason loved it too by all accounts, in fact the first time you’d ever met him was there. When Carly had first met Ben she took him in a few times to grab some treats for various date nights so you knew him well and around six months into their relationship Ben had bought Mason in so they could pick up her birthday cake.
You remembered that day fondly, you’d been rushed off your feet for most of it. Flushed, sweaty and covered in flour when they’d arrived but you’d blushed at the sight of him. Oh he’s cute you thought, suddenly realising what a state you must have looked but his gentle smile and kind eyes relaxed you.
Mason seemed impressed by everything and his sweet tooth had clearly got the better of him. Not wanting to wait until later for cake he was looking at your basically empty display to try to curb his cravings but all you had to offer him was the last triple chocolate muffin.
You knew they were good, but watching the way his eyes rolled around in his head as he took a bite filled you with satisfaction. The sinful moans and groans pouring from his lips telling you how much he was enjoying it without any words as Ben watched on with mild embarrassment at his friends' antics.
That had been a year ago and it was pretty safe to say you’d all formed a pretty strong bond since then. Mason was alway nipping into your shop to get his sugar fix, in the end striking a deal with you that you’d give him a box of leftover items from that day in exchange for tickets to his games and you’d often be caught leaving them outside his front door with a silly note attached. That was until he’d moved away around five months ago now and you barely got to see him.
You knew he was a bit homesick so you began sending his sweet treats up to him in the post and you still remember how happy and excited he sounded when he called you that first day he’d received them.
You liked Mason, he was fun and kind and just someone who made you feel good when you were around him. You both grew to be great friends as you hung out with Ben and Carly and soon enough as you met more of their friends you had a pretty nice friendship group going even with him being further away.
But you weren’t blind. You knew how attractive he was and you couldn’t lie you had a soft spot for him but you loved the way it was so platonic between you both. He was never over the top with you, if anything he always came across as soft and a little shy. A true gentleman that was never inappropriate with you and you truly treasured having him around.
There had been a weird and unfamiliar tension in the air since he’d stepped in to save you earlier though. You weren’t sure what it was, maybe the alcohol and some new found confidence, but his eyes were focused on your lips constantly when you were talking and the times you did make eye contact, his were dark and sultry.
‘Come on then, Muffin. Let’s get you out’ Mason laughed quietly and you shook your head even though your heart was fluttering.
Muffin.
What had started out as a cute nickname he’d given you after the first treat he’d tried from you had become a small inside joke. You pretended you hated it as you really had at first, but now you’d grown fond of it. The fact he seemed to be using it as more of a term of endearment now made your insides melt every time the name passed his lips but he didn’t need to know that.
You allowed him to help you out of the car, stumbling slightly in your drunken state but he was there to catch you. Hands tightly gripping your waist and you held onto his strong shoulders, laughing into his chest before he turned and bent slightly. You could never seem to say no to this man so you let him help you on his back, arms around his neck as his arms looped around your legs so he could carry you up the drive and into Ben's house.
He was straight into the kitchen, popping you down onto the counter so he could scour Ben's fridge for snacks and you laughed as he absentmindedly wiggled his hips as he assessed his options.
Sober Mason was one of your favourite people, but tipsy Mason was something else. His bleary eyes and dopey smile tugged at your heart strings and you watched on with a fond look as he was seemingly lost in his world. This was the first time you’d seen him like this and the more you were, the softer you were feeling for him.
‘Hey Mase? Why don’t you check in the box on the counter? 'Carly called as everyone started filtering in and you watched him shimmy over to the box of treats you’d bought over earlier in the day.
‘Ooo, muffins’ he giggled, lifting one out before making his way back to you. You watched as he practically shoved half of it into his mouth before offering you some, where you awkwardly managed to take a bite. His eyes were on your lips the whole time, a fond smile playing on his as he watched you intently. ‘Does it ever feel weird eating the stuff you’ve made? I’d imagine it feels like eating your own babies’
You wanted to laugh but you were frozen. The feel of his thumb running under your lip to gently brush away the crumbs made you stop until his eyes were back on yours. Your heart melting at the gesture but also at the crumbs all over his face so you reached out yourself to do the same to him yet the smile on his face made it difficult. You didn’t miss the way his breath hitched in his throat at the feel of your fingers though, eyes carefully locking as he took down a nervous gulp before you couldn’t take the intensity of it anymore.
‘You’re a weird drunk, Mase. I can’t believe this is the first time I’ve seen you like this’ you commented as he scrunched his nose up at you adorably.
‘Well I like to let my hair down on my birthday but what can I say, I’m a good boy usually’
‘I’m not so sure I believe that’
‘Yeah I don’t think I would either’ he laughed before his hands found your hips and he winked at you seductively.
This Mason was different to any Mason you’d seen before. Wondering where the hell he’d been hiding the extra cheeky and flirty form of himself but you couldn’t say you weren’t enjoying it. It had been a while since you’d been paid any male attention and the fact it was coming from someone like Mason was making you giddy.
‘You two coming in?’ Ben suddenly called from the doorway, motioning to where everyone else was in the other room and you watched in fascination as Mason shoved the rest of the muffin in his mouth before nodding.
‘Coming now’ he called, holding a hand out to you to help you down but you shook your head at him.
‘You go, I just need to get my shoes off and I’ll be in’ you told him but his hand was on your thigh instantly.
‘I’ll do it’
‘No Mase-‘
‘I can do it’ he told you sternly and before you could stop him, he was getting down on one knee in front of you so he could rest your foot on his thigh. You weren’t quite sure what he was up to but you felt a shiver roll through you as his fingers trailed down your legs. He must have felt it too, you could see the cocky smile playing on his lips as he delicately traced your skin.
You let him carry on, enjoying his soft touches as your skin tingled in the wake of his fingers before he finally made it to your ankle strap. He was quick to unbuckle it and pull your shoe off before manoeuvring the other leg so he could do the same, your heartbeat quickening with every second that was passing and as soon as your other shoe was off his eyes were on yours.
You were frozen under his seductive gaze, unsure of what to do next as his fingers gripped your ankle but even in your wildest dreams you couldn’t have foreseen him breaking eye contact so he could place a small kiss to the inside of your calf.
It was like the wind was knocked out of you, but you didn’t have time to react properly. He was up on his feet again, hands on your waist so he could help you down but you felt yourself wobble slightly as you hit the floor. Thankfully Mason's hands were still on you to steady you and you shot him a small smile that he returned as you ran your hands up his arms to grip his biceps.
‘Thank you’ you whispered, making Mason smile as he bit his lip to try and suppress it. You couldn’t take your eyes off of each other, trapped in a trance until the booming sound of Ben calling for Mason made you flinch.
‘Mase! Get in here!’ He bellowed, causing Mason to playfully roll his eyes at you before nodding his head in the direction of the living room.
‘You coming?’
‘Yeah, I’ll be there in a sec’ you told him and with one final squeeze of your waist he was gone.
Where the hell has this boy been hiding? You thought to yourself. Mason had always been a little cheeky but this was something else. He was sexy and alluring in a way you’d never seen him be before. You could feel the atmosphere between you becoming thick and electric but you were unsure about what it all meant. In the end you pushed everything to the side and padded into the living room to join the conversation in hopes of distracting yourself.
Mason was sitting in the arm chair, his legs spread wide and you unconsciously licked your lips as you fantasised about crawling into his lap.
‘Ah there you are,’ Carly called, patting the seat next to her as an invitation for you. ‘Saved you a seat’
‘Thank you’ you smiled, plonking yourself down next to her but immediately you felt too far away from Mason and his cheeky knowing smirk thrilled you.
‘I swear to god, I’m never going out again, those rude pricks ruin it every time. I’m trying to dance with my girls not get touched up’ Carly suddenly moaned, and you nodded in agreement beside her. ‘Sorry we ruined your birthday night out Mase’
It was true, the whole reason you were all home so early was due to the fact you and the rest of the girls couldn’t seem to enjoy yourselves at the club you were in. At first you didn’t care, if they wanted to look they could, but as time went on you could feel the lingering touch of countless men. You’d pushed all of them away, moving in closer to Carly and the other girls but it was no use. It was only when Mason appeared out of nowhere and wrapped his arms around you did you start to feel a little safer.
‘Don’t worry about it, I think I’m happier here when I can hear myself think’
‘Maybe we’re getting a little too old for clubs now. I don’t know about you but the whole thing stresses me out’ you laughed and thankfully everyone pretty much agreed with you.
‘I still want to go to a few clubs when we’re away’ Carly told Ben, referring to the big group holiday all your friends were going on to Portugal in a few weeks.
From what Carly had told you it was her and Ben, Dec and Lauren, Woody and his new girlfriend Kayla who you’d met a couple of times and Mason. You had been invited from the start but due to low funds and a shop to run you’d had to pass and even though it was your decision it still stung a bit to hear them talk about it. ‘I really wish you were coming, y/n’
‘So you’re really not coming then?’ Woody asked as he popped himself on the arm of Mason's chair and you shook your head lightly.
‘It’s fine, I’ve got a lot on’ you shrugged, trying to play it off but you knew deep down you were disappointed you couldn’t go. You hadn’t had a proper holiday in years and you could feel the pit of jealousy in your stomach at the thought of seeing everyone’s holiday snaps. ‘I’m just gonna grab a glass of water’ you mumbled before jumping up to go to the kitchen.
You took your time, hoping by the time you were back the conversation had moved on but you could hear them all still talking about the villa so you popped yourself on the stairs and had a quick check of your emails.
‘Who are you texting? Anyone I should be worried about?’ You suddenly heard, looking up to see Mason walking towards you and you smiled as he took a seat next to you.
‘No I was just checking some work emails’
‘Ah yeah, sure’ he winked, bumping his shoulder into yours. ‘So, still no Mr Muffin on the scene?’
‘I don’t really have time’ you told him but he just scoffed at your answer.
‘Everyone has time. You just have to make it’
‘Fine, I haven’t met someone I’m willing to make time for yet’ you countered, watching the way he raised his brows at you. ‘What about you anyway? Is there a Mrs Mount lurking about?’
‘The only Mrs Mount you need to be concerned about is my mum. And she loves you anyway so I wouldn’t worry about it’ he smiled, your heart fluttering as you thought back to meeting her at a few games. She’d always been super sweet to you and you were glad to know she liked you back. ‘So in answer to your question, no. I haven’t met someone I’m willing to make time for either’
‘Considering you could probably pull half of the population I'm surprised’ you laughed and you couldn’t help but notice the blush that settled on the bridge of his nose. ‘Are you blushing?’ You teased, laughing as he hid his face in his hands. ‘Aww been a while since you received a compliment?’
‘Been a while since I received anything’ he joked, his words clearly having a double meaning and you felt yourself now redden at his words but the alcohol in your system shut off the sensible part of your brain and you felt yourself agreeing.
‘Oh tell me about it, I feel like I’ve forgotten how to do it’ you giggled, watching his eyes crinkle adorably as he nodded along.
‘It’s like riding a bike, you’ll be fine when you give it another go’
‘Yeah but it’s finding someone to help me, you know… get back on the horse’
‘Are you kidding me? Did I or did I not save you from a long line of men who clearly wanted to get in your pants tonight?’ He teased and you rolled your eyes at him playfully.
‘Well yeah, but if you think I’m taking some random man from a club home then you’re very mistaken. I don’t know where he’s been’ you laughed and you watched him turn on the step slightly so he could face you a bit easier. You took this as your cue to do the same with both of your elbows resting on the step above you, smiling happily at him.
‘Okay so hypothetically, if you were to take someone home. What’s your type?’ He asked, his fingers delicately tracing your knee and you felt your breath catch in your throat at the intimate gesture.
‘I mean pretty much what everyone else wants’ you said lowly. ‘Tall, dark and handsome’
‘Well then look no further. I may not be overly tall but I’ve got the other two on lockdown’ he winked and you felt your face heat up. Not sure if he was being serious or not, thinking maybe it was the alcohol talking but you shook your thoughts away and tried to move the conversation on.
‘Well what’s your type then?’ You questioned and he looked at you thoughtfully before speaking.
‘Nice eyes, pretty smile’ he started and you rolled your eyes at his generic statement, thinking that’s what all boys say but you stayed silent and let him continue. ‘Someone confident but a little shy, feisty around the right people’ he carried on, pulling back to look at you properly and your tummy dropped. Is he talking about me? You wondered, your thoughts somewhat confirmed when his fingers started trailing up your thigh and it took everything in you to keep up eye contact with him when all you wanted to do was watch where his fingers were going.
‘Anything else?’ You whispered
‘Good eye contact’ he smiled before reaching up to tuck your hair behind your ear. He let his hand trail down your neck until he was holding you just under your ear so he could gently tip your head to the side before leaning over like he was about to kiss your cheek.
He didn’t, but you felt your legs go to jelly and he gently rubbed his nose along your cheekbone whilst a low hum poured from his lips. ‘Smells nice’ he whispered, pulling back so his lips were an inch from yours. Your foreheads nearly touching as his eyes scanned your face. ‘Probably tastes even better’ he finally uttered, causing you to take a small shocked breath in.
You were hanging on his every word, heart pounding as he was seeming getting closer to you and you subconsciously tilted your head up to meet him in the middle. You’d never understood the concept of being drawn to someone like a magnet but you finally felt it as you were pulled in his direction. Your lips so close they were almost touching but at the last second he backed up with a knowing smile across those pretty lips of his.
‘Not here’ he whispered, tilting his head so he could lightly kiss your cheek and you couldn’t lie you were slightly disappointed. You saw him go to say something else, yet the words never made it out of his mouth. You both jumped at the sound of Ben's voice calling him from the other room, scrambling away from each other when you heard his footsteps and you knew you were blushing hard when he eventually rounded the corner to see you both.
‘Woodys setting up the ps5, you coming?’ He asked, not really looking at the pair of you or waiting for an answer before heading out causing the pair of you to chuckle.
‘I’ll come find you in a bit, yeah?’ He promised and all you could do was nod. You sat wondering what the hell had just happened. This ultra flirty sexy version of Mason obviously only came out when he was drunk and you were a little bit disappointed this was the first you’d ever seen of him.
You went on the hunt for Carly though, hoping he would come and find you soon but you’d been separated from Mason for about half an hour now and your eyes rarely left each others. Even when he didn’t know you were looking you could see his eyes all over you in a way he never had before and you couldn’t lie and say you weren’t loving all the attention he was giving you. When he was distracted for a while you made your way upstairs to the bathroom so you could sort yourself out as you knew you probably looked like a hot mess. The combination of Mason's flirty antics and the alcohol in your system had made you flustered and you needed some time out just to collect yourself.
‘Hello? Who’s in here?’ You heard, Masons voice booming through the door suddenly as you’d just finished washing your hands and you smiled instantly as you dried your them off.
‘It’s me’
‘Hi me’ he chuckled, clearly pleased with himself and you quickly opened the door to reveal his dozy smile and kind eyes.
‘Hello you’ you laughed, stepping aside and back over to the sink in hopes he would follow you inside and you smiled as you heard the door click shut. ‘Missing me already?’
‘Maybe. Missed looking at you in this dress at least’ he commented, positioning himself behind you with his hands on your hips as you caught eyes in the reflection of the mirror. You were trying to act unbothered, touching up your makeup like you didn’t care but his teasing attitude was making you crumble.
‘Oh yeah?’ You giggled, unsure as to what to say to him but the need to clench your thighs together was growing stronger and you watched him eye you up with his bottom lip trapped in between his teeth.
‘Mmhmm’ he teased, squeezing your hips softly before his eyes returned to yours. ‘I mean you always look good but I like this one a lot’
‘I’ll make sure to wear it more often then’ you told him quietly, watching him gather your hair and move it over one of your shoulders so he could expose your neck. You knew it was coming, but when his lips finally touched the base you felt your whole body erupt in goosebumps.
You didn’t say a word, just watching him in the mirror as he slowly peppered kisses up and down your exposed skin as you tried to regulate your breathing but you could tell he knew how much things were affecting you. The smile on your lips telling him as much but the hard length that was pressed against you bum was telling you how much he himself was enjoying too.
‘Easy there big boy’ you laughed, squeezing his hands that were gripping your waist and he buried his face into your neck with laugh before pulling back. His eyes were basically black as he turned you round to face him, pressing his crotch into yours and you had to hold back a moan.
‘I’ll show you big boy’ he whispered, lips dangerously close to yours and as much as you loved his teasing you’d had enough now and were ready to have him. Luckily for you, the pair of you seemed to be on the same page because as soon you wrapped your hand around the back of his neck his lips were on yours.
It was one of the softest kisses you’d ever had, lightly brushing your lips against each other but it was growing heavier by the second until the pair of you appeared to have gotten the giggles. Laughing onto each other lips until it was becoming impossible to carry on
‘What is happening’ you giggled, your hands coming to grip his jaw so he wouldn’t part from you but the firm grip on your thighs already told you he wouldn’t be.
‘I don’t know’ he laughed, peppering kisses across your jaw and cheeks. ‘I don’t wanna stop though’ he breathed and you had just enough time to nod your head in agreement before he was back kissing you. Deeper this time as his hands travelled up your thighs and to your bum, pushing your dress up with him so he could grip your cheeks with his thumbs under the waistband of your underwear, stroking your skin gently. A contrast into how aggressive he was being with his mouth.
You didn’t know what came over you but you pulled back, resting your hands behind you so you could shift your weight onto them. Raising your hips in order for him to rid you of your underwear and even though he was taken aback you could tell he wanted to rip them off of you.
‘Come on Mase. I thought you were gonna show me your big boy’ you laughed, watching his expression turn shocked before he was smiling devilishly at you.
‘Don’t start something you can’t finish, sweetheart’
‘Try me’ you whispered, knowing he wouldn’t be able to resist as soon as the words left your mouth he was blushing before he pulled your underwear from you as quickly as he could, kissing you frantically.
You knew what you wanted, reaching to undo his jeans but he pulled you away before placing your hands in his hair. Thankfully he knew what you wanted, his thumb connecting to your clit suddenly and you moaned into his mouth at the sensation.
‘Mase, please’
‘Shhh’ he breathed, his lips trailing down your neck before biting your shoulder. ‘Easy baby. Let me take my time with you’
‘We don’t have time. They’ll coming looking for us soon’
Mason let out a short breath, knowing you were right and you couldn’t risk it so when your hands flew to his trousers again he didn’t stop you from unbuttoning them. His hands were back on your hips to pull you forward so your core was closer to him and when he tugged his boxers down so he could free himself you shivered at the sight of him.
You both knew you had to be quick, but you thanked the lord he was slow and careful with you to start with. Lining himself up with your entrance as you sat back on your hands before he hooked your legs over his forearms to give him better access.
It really had been a while, the stretch of him delicious and by the look on his face he was clearly feeling the same. His thrusts slow and steady before he picked his pace up, the sound of skin slapping against skin only making everything feel more intense and when he moved his hand to play with your clit again you swore you were seeing stars.
‘Mase’ you moaned, your head falling back as he drove into you but the low moan that fell from him made your head snap up.
‘I know, you’re so tight. Fuck’ he breathed, hips slamming into yours and you knew it wouldn’t be much longer as he’d been turning you on all night. He looked wild, dark eyes intensely on yours with his bottom lip trapped in between his teeth and the blush across his nose was proving how into it he was. You tried holding your moans in, not wanting anyone to hear you but he was making it difficult. It was like he knew your body intimately already and the way he was making you feel was like no one else ever had. ‘Come on, cum for me’ he whispered and it didn’t take you much more convincing, whimpering below him as he fucked you through it before pulling out to cum over your thighs.
Your eyes were on each others instantly, uncertainty settling inside of you but the sight of Masons pretty smile settled you instantly.
‘Sorry about the mess’ he laughed, grabbing a towel and cleaning you up before picking your underwear up off of the floor and helping you down. ‘Well that was unexpected’
‘You can say that again’ you blushed, pulling you underwear up your legs and readjusting your dress. You weren’t sure where to look but you felt his finger under your chin so he could make you look at him and as soon as you saw his kind eyes you felt settled again. ‘Happy birthday I guess’ you joked and thankfully he laughed along.
‘Thank you, you okay?’ He whispered, dropping a kiss on your forehead and you nodded shyly. ‘Good. We best go or they’ll get suspicious’
You agreed, following him out the door before he pushed you forward a little and you turned to look at him when a confused expression.
‘I’ll come in a bit. Make it look like we weren’t together’ he told you and you wanted to leave but the overwhelming need to clarify somethings before you left took over you.
‘Hey, Mase? I um- I’ve never, you know… this isn’t what I um’ you stumbled, and the heart melting smile he gave you made your tummy flip.
‘It’s okay, I know. We’re just having a bit of fun yeah?’ He told you and you felt your shoulders relax instantly. ‘We can talk about it another time if you want but don’t worry, I’m not getting down on one knee just yet’ he winked, causing you to roll your eyes with a laugh. ‘Now go, I’ll see you in a sec’
You did as you were told, trying to act as normal as possible when you went to join the others but they were back talking about the holiday and you felt your heart sink again.
You didn’t want to be a misery though, helping them find clubs and restaurants to try without trying to appear too bitter about it and when Mason finally came back you tried to avoid his eyes as to not be too suspicious but you knew he was looking at you. You were also trying to to not over think what had just happened with Mason just now. It was so unexpected, you didn’t know what had come over the pair of you and it was like you could still feel his touch on your skin.
When it all got a bit too much you went back to the kitchen, no longer wanting to hear about all the exciting things they had planned while you slaved away in a hot kitchen. You knew you were being moody and it was your choice not to go but it didn’t make it hurt any less having to hear about it.
‘I’ve been thinking’ Mason announced suddenly and your heart nearly jumped out of your chest from the sound of his voice. ‘This holiday, it’s not right you not coming. I know you wanna be there so I’d like for you to come with me’
‘You know I can’t Mase, I can’t afford it for one’ you told him, finally admitting to someone the real reason for you not going but by the look on his face you could tell he knew it already.
‘That’s why I’m asking for you to come with me. You don’t need to worry about that then’
‘What?’ You asked, your face scrunching up in confusion ‘Mase, no-‘
‘Before you say no, just listen to me’ he laughed coming over to you so he could trap you in between his arms by placing his hands on the counter either side of you. ‘You know me, you know I’ll do anything for the people in my life and if anyone deserves a break it’s you’ he told you sincerely before his face turned cheeky. ‘Plus, I think I can make it worth your while’
‘What do you mean?’ You asked skeptically
‘Just let me look after you a bit, yeah? We’re both stressed out and need a break. I’ve only got a couple of weeks before I need to get back to training and I need to let off some steam. I’m not saying this has to be anything you know? But there’s obviously some level of attraction here and I’d rather spend my time with you than go through all the shit of trying to find someone else. You get that right? I’ve got a rep to protect’ he winked.
You were confused to say the least, not sure exactly what he was getting at but if it was what you were thinking then couldn’t lie, you were tempted. If you were understanding correctly he was willing to whisk you away with him for a week of sun sea and no strings sex for nothing. The tipsy part of your brain was willing to accept straight away, eager to get to feel more of him again yet the sober part knew it sounded too good to be true.
‘So you mean…?’
‘We keep it casual you know? You scratch my back, I scratch yours. You said you don’t know where these boys have been but you know exactly where I’ve been cause it’s just with you. Then at the end of the week we go back to our normal lives. I just need someone who I can trust and I know that’s you and I hope you know you can trust me. And we both know we can be sneaky sneaky now so it’s a win win’
‘I don’t know, Mase…’
‘If you don’t wanna, you know, that’s fine I’m not asking you to come for that reason only. Just turn up. That’s all I’m asking. If anything else happens then cool but I hate the thought of you being here when we’re there. You’re meant to be with us’ he reasoned and even though that took some of the pressure off he could still tell you were unsure. ‘What’s holding you back?’
‘We’ve been drinking Mase. This may sound like a good idea now but what about tomorrow when you’re wondering why the hell you even kissed me, let alone anything else’ you asked but he looking at you like you were talking rubbish before he shook his head with a laugh.
‘Stop talking shit. If it makes you feel any better I can text you tomorrow cause I know for a fact I’ll still feel the same. This isn’t just some weird thing I thought of off the cuff, I’ve hated the thought of you not coming with us since Ben told me’
‘It’s a lot of money, Mase’ you whispered ‘I’d never be able to pay you back.
‘I’m not asking you too. There’s plenty of other ways to repay me’ he teased and you rolled your eyes with a smile. ‘Not like that’
‘Like what then?’
‘I’ll let you buy me an ice cream’ he smiled as you laughed into your hands. ‘Or you can make me lunch or help me with my sun cream. I’m not bothered about how much it costs or you paying me back. I just want you there’ he huffed and you couldn���t lie, you were convinced. ‘Please muffin’ he pouted, bumping his nose with yours and you smiled up at him softly.
‘It’s not just the money, I can’t leave the shop that long’
‘What about Nads?’ He asked, referring to the girl you hired a few months ago to help you run things. ‘Think of it like a trial or something for her. If she does a good job then you can leave her in charge more often and you get a bit more of a life. I know it’s your baby but you have to learn to let go sometimes’ he told you and you hated how reasonable he sounded.
‘Can I think about it? I’ll let you know tomorrow’ you asked quietly and with a small nod he closed the relatively small gap to place his lips on yours in a soft kiss.
‘Take all the time you need’ he nodded before wrapping his arms around your shoulders so he could pull you into a hug. ‘You staying here tonight?’
‘Yeah’
‘Well I’m gonna head home with Woody in a sec’ he told you gently, the pout in your face evident even though he couldn’t see you. ‘We’ll talk tomorrow yeah? About all of it’ he suggested and you knew he mean the holiday and whatever had happened between you earlier.
‘Okay’ you whispered before he dropped a soft kiss on your forehead.
‘Have a good sleep, yeah? I’ll text you in the morning’ he smiled before giving you one last squeeze and pulling away.
y/n
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liked by: carlywlms_, masonmount, benchilwell and others
Y/n mission take a picture in focus has failed
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carlywlms_ my sparkly sister ✨
y/n the brightest star in my sky 💫
benchilwell Why do I not remember any of this
y/n that’s cause you’ve got nothing in between your ears
masonmount thanks for a lovely evening 🩷
y/n happy birthday masey moo 🥳🎁
jorginhofrello happy bday papai ♥️
woody_ you’re missing out on a week of this
y/n that’s fine I don’t think my body could physically take it 😩
okaylaaa pray for me ☹️
y/n 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼
masonprivate nice shoes 😏
y/n you too 🤫
yungchalobah 👀🤔
y/n 🫣
Tagged: @footiehoemcfc @prideofpd @yoursselo @chelseachilly @willow-writer-ivy @mm-vii @katharinanadiaa @mmountseb @carlottawllms @saltyheartnightmare @masonmtxo @harvestmount @chillymountsjess @treblebluesblog @pulisicsgirl
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disillusioneddanny · 3 months
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Hate in the dpxdc tag.
I have seen a major influx recently of people complaining about popular dpxdc tropes in the DPxDC tag as well as people just sharing hate in the tag again.
And yes, your feelings are valid, you are allowed to not like things in a fandom and you should be able to talk about it.
BUT there is something called fandom etiquette
With this lovely term, fandom etiquette, there are important things to remember.
don't yuck someone else's yum
just because you don't like something, does not mean that others can't like it. I've seen people go in the tag with things like "why is everyone writing ghost king danny? that's such an overused trope and it's not even good" and while you may feel like that, there are definitely people who truly enjoy ghost king danny and by making that post visible where people can see, you're just making people feel bad for enjoying something.
Again, you're allowed to dislike something, but if your dislike is making someone else feel bad about enjoying it, you're just being mean.
2. Don't put hate in the main tag.
if you really, really just need to complain/vent about a trope or something you don't like about a fandom, then do it!! that's totally fine. But don't tag it with the main tags. If you're tagging your hate post with #dpxdc or any of the variations of the tag, you're doing that so that people can see that hate and this goes back to number 1. don't yuck someone's yum.
if you really want to complain about it, don't tag the post, or tag it #antidpxdc so that people can filter out the post so that people do not have to see your hate when they are scrolling through a fandom tag to just enjoy their blorbos.
"but I don't like this thing and i'm allowed to voice my opinion "
I totally get not liking something in fandom, I really do. There are plenty of tropes or ships that squick me out. And those feelings are valid, but i also know that there are people in fandom who genuinely enjoy those things and it's easy for me to avoid reading those tropes.
filtering content is super easy! Ao3 is a very user friendly archive with really simply ways to filter out content. Don't want to see ghost king danny? exclude that tag in your searches. Will that mean that all of them are taken off? probably not. Unfortunately not everyone tags their works with every single aspect of their story. And sometimes authors just miss things! And that's totally okay. But guess what? the back button is right there. you can exit out of the fic so easily without having to leave a comment to complain or without posting about how much you vehemently hate ghost king danny on tumblr in the dpxdc or the DP tag. Just don't tag your complaints :) it's that easy. Or if you really want to.
I know that the DP fandom has a very fraught history with the word anti from back in the day and that's totally understandable, that was a rough time that caused a lot of trauma for a lot of people. So if you don't feel comfortable tagging a post with #anti or #antidpxdc that's totally fine, just don't tag it at all. Or at the very least put in your tags that you're complaining or hating on something so that it's easier for people to filter out your posts where they don't have to see them in the main tag.
You're totally allowed to not like things. But remember that someone else does and you might be making them feel bad for not liking it and that means you're screwing up someone else's fandom experience and that's a pretty shitty thing to do imo.
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a-d-nox · 19 days
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the root chakra and whether i believe you could survive an apocalypse
the root chakra is telling of our survival instincts and what we need to survive.
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1 (the magician): absolutely these people are super resourceful and can definitely figure out how to survive in a post-apocalyptic world.
media representation: mike lowe on alone s2
2 (the high priestess): you saw the end coming but likely want nothing to do with long term living in a world without life and only death. you probably are a prepper though.
3 (the empress): it's pretty unlikely you will live - you are too reliant on others providing for you and likely would miss the convince of the modern world.
4 (the emperor): 100% is going to live - this person saw it coming and was preparing for a long time (mentally, physically, etc). they don't have interest in a commune either or rather they would never be dependent on others to survive - they would probably become a leader in an apocalypse.
media representation: any lead character in a post-apocalyptic movie / tv show
5 (the hierophant): dooms-dayer - 100% percent would pray on those who are scared and convince them that you have minimal ways to survive most of which will involve aiding them. they are the type to dictate to others what they need to be done but won't get their own hands dirty. they have zero issues turning religion into a way of life and claiming that current passages were warning them all along - they definitely would result to implementing scare tactics.
media representation: david in the last of us
6 (the lovers): reliant on others for survival. they aren't likely to last long in that regard but also they are likely prone to depression and would become existentialistic.
7 (the charioteer): their survival depends on whether or not they have survival gear - if they don't have a good baseline, they are likely going to be the first to go. they do make good nomads though so long as they do not depend on motorways too early into the apocalypse.
8 (strength): they start out strong then end up giving up. they can be prone to getting hurt too so it is likely they will succumb to infection - perhaps consider shaping up your first aid and herbal knowledge base.
9 (the hermit): the hermit himself was a man of the wilderness - he disappeared on his own and survived on his own. these people are likely to do the same. very little will impend them they just have to be of the mindset they can do it.
media representation: the tv show alone
10 (wheel of fortune): this is the person who just survives based off of dumb luck sometimes these people have really really bad luck though.
11 (justice): this is a practical individual - who knows how to use their resources. unfortunately, they are rather high maintenance so they might be unhappy in a post-apocalyptic world.
media representation: american horror stories: apocalypse (s8)
12 (the hanged man): nope 100% wouldn't make it - probably would be the one to want to loot and take from stores then get hurt in the process because they aren't aggressive enough.
13 (death): they bounce back all the time, so i wouldn't be surprised if they just keep coming back from almost dying.
media representation: joel in the last of us
14 (temperance): they would be great at moderation/rationing their supplies, but they can experience exposure to the elements that nearly kills them if not kills them.
15 (the devil): nope, they are too dependent on the modern world and likely couldn't adjust to new horrors of an apocalyptic world.
16 (the tower): i mean they are preppers and i can see them being capable and durable, but they are accident prone and can have a horrible death if not careful.
17 (the star): absolutely not - these people are quick to give up and feel hopeless in a post-apocalyptic world. they are also prone to being overly exposed to the elements.
18 (the moon): i feel like they could survive but the question is whether or not they could bear being alone with themselves... being alone makes you face all the shadows of the self. i don't feel that they would do well in a group dynamic as they would clash with the different personalities.
19 (the sun): oop these people dip so hard. they don't care what it takes to survive they simply will.
20 (judgment): simply yes. they are very capable of remaking a life in a world they no longer recognize.
21 (the world): definitely. this is a bad ass placement - they come out on top every single time. they are often the last man standing in a survival situation.
22 (the fool): they lack awareness and it tends to be their downfall. also they take too many risks and in a survival situation, you can't simply "wing it".
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nothing-ramblings · 1 month
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i DO think laios is "autism creature" autistic. I think he's actually a great example of that. Most of the time i see the autism creature associated with special interests and hyperfixations and there's no way you could argue that's not a trait he has, it's a major plotnpoint that drives the story forward along with his other motivation. Something I also see a lot is the austism creature being used as an example of cluelessness, because of its expression. How are you gonna point to his social awkwardness, the fact that he's literally completely clueless about making people uncomfortable unless it's explicitly stated to him, and say he doesn't fit that description. I'n not sure what "tumblr" autism is supposed to mean, the person was probably talking about the more palatable traits people discuss more openly, but do you really think people aren't socially awkward in this webbed site?
i saw a rlly good post reacting to someone else's rotten take, unfortunately at the time i was too tired to read the full post and i ended up losing it, so i don't remember what all it said but basically the rotten take was calling laios creepy (in a "funny haha way" to disguise it) due to his traits, and op of the post i saw was explaining how that's fucked up. I think from what I skimmed it was very personal, comparing their own experiences to laios and honestly that might be my favorite thing about him. He doesn't just have the "palatable" traits that people are comfortable seeing. He is clueless, he had no idea someone disliked him, he even thought they were close friends, because that person never let him know when he was crossing a boundary until it was too much. Soon after this almost the opposite happens, where he doesn't believe someone else wants to be his friend, because now he's aware that he can't pick up on social cues, and he also knows he caused this person discomfort before, so why would they want to be his friend? He's "messy" in that he has a lot of traits people like to avoid when talking about autism, because it's stuff neurotypicals don't like.
He's literally that kid who people would be like "oh well if i knew he was autistic i wouldn't have treated him badly" (which is stupid, you should treat people well in general and not be an asshole then apologize because someone is actually neurodivergent or mentally ill). And guess what? He has friends who love him. They know he's awkward and clueless and has "weird" interests and they still love him. He has people who will stand up for him even after coming to the conclusion that he's "a little creepy" because they know he's a good person, and they like his honesty. Someone explicitly admits they envy his ability to be so openly himself, even after that same person tried to frame that trait as a bad thing, because they realized what they hated wasn't laios honesty but the fact that laios is able to act that way, while most people feel trapped by social rules and don't have that same freedom to be themselves. Laios can be himself not because society accepts him, in fact the first assumption when the elves learn he likes monsters is that he must be prone to evil. Because that's weird and creepy. Society does not accept him. His friends do. His sister does, she loves him and looks up to him as an adult as much as she did as a child. He has a support system. He is loved. Even people who don't necssarily love him know he could never become evil, even if they also think his special interest is a bit creepy. Because they know laios, actually know him, and they know that in his awkwardness he's still a kind person. He misses a lot of social cues, sometimes he says things that are tone deaf without realizing at all, and his friends know he means no harm. He just struggles with these things.
I think laios is a very good example of how nobody is unlovable, regardless of how awkward or clueless you might be, even if your special interest is something perceived as creepy. To me Laios is a reminder for anyone who needs to hear it that you are deserving of love too. Maybe you just beed to find a better support system, and that might take a while, but there's people who will love you the way you are, and accept you the way you are
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angelofthepage · 2 months
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Thoughts on the "Updated" Bendy Employee Handbook
Before we go any further, let's make it very clear what kind of post this is: we're not here to hate on the book, and none of anything I'm about to say is said with ill intent. I am here for analysis, constructive criticism, and discussion. This post is a little more critical than what I would usually share, so viewer discretion is advised.
Today we're talking about the newly updated Bendy Employee Handbook, which just recently released as of this month at the time of this post. And I have a lot of questions about this entry, and really, game guides as a whole in our modern gaming world. This book appeared to advertise itself as a rerelease of the original handbook with additional content for Bendy and the Dark Revival, but upon comparing the two, I've noticed there's actually a number of changes they've made, some good, some bad, and some that I'm not sure what to make of. So come and join me under the cut, and if you have some thoughts of your own, feel free to comment or reblog and add to the discussion. Without further ado, here we go!
Part 1: The Baffling Amount of Cut Content
Our story begins where most stories do, the table of contents. So right off the bat, when comparing this book to the original, you'll notice something off.
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No, your eyes do not deceive you, an entire section of the original book was cut, on top of making other sections shorter. And the weirdest part? Some of these things were exclusive to that original book, they didn't appear anywhere else in the Bendy franchise. So already we're off to a weird start. Some of these missing pages aren't so bad though. In some cases, they're just format changes to make the book flow a little better/take up less room. Sometimes they succeed in that, sometimes they end up feeling more cramped, it's pretty subjective whether or not this improved the book. But it certainly does cut down on pages. Case in point, the beginning of each chapter of BATIM.
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Don't worry, Joey's letter hasn't been cut, but it has been moved to earlier in the book, so it's no longer in Chapter 1. This was a very odd change. Other things that are missing are character monologues, but it's inconsistent. Alice Angel's speech about the screaming well of voices and Joey's monologue right before the final boss were kept, but Sammy's "sheep sheep sheep" speech and Bertrum's audiolog right before his boss fight were inexplicably cut.
Here are a few cuts I found pretty significant.
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These pages are all missing from the update. In the case of this newspaper article, what does that mean in regards to whether or not this is "canon" or "retconned"? Joey Drew, did you or did you not have plans to expand into a Bendy themed toothpaste? The people need to know! X''D But seriously, while some of this is inconsequential, some of it matters. The mascot costume in particular, that's the only sketch we get (that I'm assuming came from Bertrum or Joey regarding that part of the parks, no one is specifically credited for making it). It doesn't show up anywhere else in the series (to my knowledge). It's strange that it's just, gone now. The Bendyland spread is such an unfortunate loss, that's some of the closest we've ever gotten to seeing the map of the park. Yes you can see it in BATIM, but being able to get up close and personal with it without having to control Henry was really nice. It makes me wonder if they're trying to erase the past details so they can do more with Bendyland in the future, something that's different from the original vision. I don't think that's it, but it could be, though they'd also have to go back on The Illusion of Living too, given it’s discussed there with some really fun details.
Speaking of which, that's the weirdest piece of cut content: the missing section that ends the old book (that was reiterated in The Illusion of Living). It's Joey Drew's tips for making a cartoon. It's formatted differently and has no images in TIOL, but the basic information is still the same. What's not the same though, is the loss of the tutorial pages for drawing the toons. These are another thing that don’t show up anywhere else in the series, making them a much more permanent loss. And even though this section is cut, it’s still referenced on the back cover of the new book, which is a bit odd.
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These were really cute and showed so much personality for not just the toons, but for Joey as he described them. Cutting this was genuinely disappointing for me. Same with the paperwork in Joey's apartment. Those were some of the highest quality images we had of what was on his desk and bulletin board, and I liked being able to see them clearer. The biggest loss of the cut content isn’t just the pages themselves, but the personality they gave to this book, and the Bendy world as a whole. 
This was the very first Bendy book to be released, and therefore our first look into this world in this format. And while I don’t think it’s the greatest thing in the world in terms of being a game guide, I didn’t pick up the original for a game guide. I picked it up because I wanted to see if it provided more context for the world. And when it does that, it does a good job. The memos from characters we know, Joey’s financial records, the images from the desks of people like Joey and Bertrum, they give us insight into how things were going at the studio. Some of my favorite details from the original are Joey’s memo about how Susie was replaced by Allison, and the receipt for Joe’s Fine Dining. The fact that that memo was distributed to everyone but Susie enhanced what we already knew from BATIM, and it paints him as a much crueler character than we knew him to be. Not to mention the repeated use of “I have to say, I’m an instant fan”. Having Joey say those words makes the concept of him creating the cycle so much more interesting. Like did he script out every little action these characters take? Or is this something Susie picked up and recycled from him after potentially finding this memo in real life? Oh there are so many delicious possibilities. And the lunch date, oh my gosh. One, it started my quest to build the Joey Drew menu using all the things he eats in the books, because damn does he have good taste. And two, it was so cool to have a look into an interaction Susie told us about in that one tape. Like that was REALLY GOOD. Give me more like that! When you have other parts of the series back up things we’ve heard only one character say, it gives more credence to the idea that they actually happened that way, or gives us a clue that we need to check for character biases when they tell us their side of the story. And in a series where MOST characters are unreliable narrators, that is REALLY IMPORTANT for establishing timelines and figuring out what’s real versus what’s fabricated. That was my biggest hope for the update, for more flavortext and world building that expands on things we already know. 
But um…the dark revival part of the book doesn’t do that. 
Part 2: The Dark Revival’s Minimal Offerings
After an abrupt jump from Bendyland to BATDR, we get into the new stuff. The Bendy and the Dark Revival section of this book is alarmingly short and has very little substance. There is no new expansion of the worldbuilding or insight into these characters. I mean, the book describes Heidi as being a female lost one? So if you wanted a confirmation on her gender, there you go I guess? I guess that detail was never like, stated explicitly, but this is me stretching to find something new that it gives us. Actually, wait, it does give us one new thing, but I’m gonna be honest, it kind of rubbed me the wrong way.
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The book refers to Allison having a “pet wolf” when we get her introduction in Chapter 1. It then later describes that Tom “likes being pet” when we get his introduction in Chapter 5. Which by the way, is the only image of Tom in this entire book, since his original render from the old version was cut. Now, I’ll be honest, I used to like that second detail, I thought it was cute that he doesn’t just tolerate Audrey, he actually LIKES being pet. Those are two different things, having some insights into Tom’s feelings and characterization would have been a breath of fresh air. But no, when I reread the book and saw that first detail, that made that really weird and uncomfortable actually. It would be one thing if in-universe, Tom called himself a pet, or Allison called him that with consent. Heck, if there was another character in-universe who wanted to purposely insult Allison and Tom by saying that, that would be fine too, then it’d be reiterating the narrative. But on its own? I take issue with taking Tom of all characters and calling him her pet. The Safehouse Boris never got treated that badly, hell, Buddy in the books never got dehumanized this badly when he became a Boris. But Tom, Tom gets to be the one that’s dehumanized? There is something that really rubs me the wrong way about that. Especially if he turns out to be Thomas Connor or has some connection to him. I can’t assume if he is or isn’t anymore given all the stuff BATDR pulled with Allison and Henry. But on the chance he IS Thomas Connor, do you have any idea how bad that looks, to have a character that, because of details written in Dreams Come to Life, many fans speculate to be a person of color, referring to him as Allison’s “pet”? And even if he ends up not being a person of color (I say as I groan about the inevitable discourse for the DCTL graphic novel that’s coming out), it’s still kind of awful to say that about anyone. Tom is a character that has repeatedly gotten the short end of the stick in this series. He’s relevant to BATDR for all of a couple of minutes, and he’s incredibly underutilized and lacking details or depth for most of the series. Thomas Connor, he gets a bit of depth as of The Lost Ones, that novel does great things for him. But Tom Wolf? Short end of the stick. And I’m sad to see that continue here. 
The one positive thing I have to say about this section is that it’s really nice to have so many of the audiolog character transcripts here. Most of the notes and logs from BATDR are here with all their words typed out. The ones that in-game had a chiller styled font are transcribed a bit strangely, as now they’re written like the messages written on the walls in-game. But it’s not the worst. If anything, all of this gives me a great resource as a theorist. Having a record of all of these and what chapters they appear in makes my goal of constructing a timeline and cross checking information much easier. 
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Though from a graphic design standpoint, these pages frustrate me a little bit. They’re so cramped, and there’s several spots where the text isn’t centered properly within its text block. I get the sense on some parts, it’s because it’s placed so close to the spine of the book, so they don’t want any information getting cut off, but it still looks funky. And there are several spots where that explanation doesn’t really apply. There’s also some weird placement of fun facts. While I love that this book lets us in on some secrets, they’re not always placed in an area that makes sense? Like, there’s a note about how to get the Inkjets Concert, but the steps for how to get it are placed way after a point in the narrative where you’d be able to get it, and I’m kind of scratching my head as to why it was done that way. Is it to encourage a second playthrough? Or is it to not spoil the story? Why not split the information up? Or have a dedicated secrets page like they do with the achievements and theMeatly’s cutouts? 
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Though speaking of not spoiling things, this book is really odd about what it chooses to focus on. So, Henry’s model is in this book, right next to a passage about a “mysterious man” you can meet in the Cyclebreakers area. They showed his model but didn’t name him as Henry? I don’t quite get that choice. Also, despite the cyclebreakers being very important to this story, they aren’t really mentioned before this very brief section. However, Porter? The character shown for all of a few seconds? He’s got at least three images throughout this book. The balance feels off with what this book chooses to put emphasis on. 
Also, this one really annoyed me: Allison. So for everyone who’s actually played BATIM, you would know that Allison Angel is never referred to as Allison within BATIM. We only know she’s called that because people dove into the game’s files and revealed her and Tom’s names upon the release of Chapter 4. And the book follows suit with this, it does not call her Allison in the original handbook whatsoever. HOWEVER, the BATDR section messes this up. When it introduces her, even though in-game she introduces herself as Alice, the book introduces her as Allison. But when we get to Chapter 5, the part where she’s actually named Allison by Audrey, it suddenly switches to calling her Nice Alice? It’s a weird choice and I don’t understand why this happened. 
It leaves me wondering just how much the new author of this section and their editors know about the Bendy series before going into this project. What context were they given to write this thing? It makes the book feel unpolished to have so many mistakes in its formatting and information. I don’t know what the quality control team for this release looked like, but a part of me wonders how many editors this went through before making it to the final release. I don’t work in publishing to know what that looks like, but I’d genuinely love to learn more on this subject, it’s fascinating. 
There’s also a very strong dissonance in the imagery. While I’m glad to see the renders from BATDR’s advertising so clearly and up close, the difference in their coloring looks strange when put next to the rest of Bendy’s usual color palette. It leaves me wondering what assets the book team was given for use in this release. There’s a lot I could say here about the importance of press kits and brand guidelines, especially in this day and age when so many fans are making just as high quality of content as the official releases of media. And that leads me to the most disappointing part of this book. 
Part 3: Stolen Content
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If you’re active in the Bendy fandom and know its many creative members, then you may already know what I’m about to dive into. MLSpence3D is an artist that enjoys 3D modeling, rigging, animating, and rendering. He can often be found engaging in all sorts of corners in the indie mascot horror community, such as playing a notable role in the production of SuperHorrorBro’s upcoming title, Glitched Out, as well as providing the renders used on the Bendy Wiki of the in-game characters. Spence has had his work mistaken for official renders before, and unfortunately, it’s not just fans making that mistake. The render of the Piper used in the BATIM portion of the original handbook is Spence’s, and it unfortunately hasn’t been removed in this update, nor has he been credited or asked for permission to have it used here. I’ll admit, his stuff looks so official that I’ve mistaken it as such too, and it speaks to a much needed conversation on assets, metadata, and protection for artists of all mediums. 
Our fandom is not the only place where this happens. Back when FNAF: Help Wanted was in production, the cover art mistakenly used fan renders as a part of its photomanipulation. Developer Scott Cawthon was quick to apologize and make things right, removing the renders and replacing them with officially made FNAF models. Heck, we had something similar happen right here with Bendy back when the voice cast of BATDR started working with Streamily. The initial post that advertised their Streamily debut used renders from Spence and a few other artists that had to be tracked down, and they didn’t have the rights to use them, nor were they credited. It makes a lot of sense that this happens, when you don’t have sufficient resources and aren’t an active member of the fandom, if you’re a graphic designer trying to make a piece to advertise something, you’re going to need assets to make that. And if you’re not given sufficient assets by the people you’re designing for, you turn to other sources to get the job done. They may not know what on Google is official vs fan content. The fans are so skilled and passionate about what they do, and with the number of series that have fans steadily joining the official teams, it’s incredible what can result from being passionate. But it also makes for a much needed reminder to add metadata to your files so that they can be traced back as belonging to you. Watermark your stuff, clearly mark your work as fan content in the tags, captions, and descriptions, in an effort to protect yourself. Don’t use images you find online unless you have a very clear idea of where they came from, so you can direct people back to the source when they ask about it (or better yet, link the source in your description from the start). Give people another reason to pause and double check their work in the chain of command (they should be pausing to double check anyway, but let's be real, we don't live in a perfect world). In a world where credit and sources are more important than ever, remembering to give credit where it’s due from the start will save you all kinds of headaches in the future. Video game developers, especially those of you in the indie scene: please develop press kits to give to people your teams collaborate with. By giving them assets they can reliably use to advertise for you, you will save everyone a lot of hassle in the long run. And if this is still happening even with a press kit, it merits having some conversations to evaluate why and solve the problem. If there is no other takeaway anyone gets from this post, this is the big one I want to see some positive change on in the future.
Part 4: The Functionality as a Game Guide
This book works for your first time through BATDR, but not for any kind of sequential playthroughs. The way it directs you through the game uses the audiologs and notes as waypoints. Once you pick them up, they are removed from the environment, and so if you’re picking up the game after a long time away from it, you’re not gonna remember where those were, so it’s likely not going to be useful for navigating. It reminds me a lot of the way my parents talked about one of our old hometowns. We lived in Vermont for a little while, and there were two things about our area that we laughed about. One, never leave your car unlocked unless you want it filled with zucchini. Two, if you ask for directions, you’re not gonna have a clue unless you’re a local, because they word everything in a similar fashion to “you’re gonna drive past where the old barn used to be”. At least give me a landmark that still exists, or a map! The BATIM chapters aren’t much better, they sort of give you a layout map, but it’s not helpful. Especially in Chapter 3, the place where you arguably need a map the most, there is no kind of instruction for how to get through Alice’s fetch quests if you get lost. 
In my mind, a game guide is something you turn to when you need help getting through a game. Now, mind you, I am not the target audience for a game guide. I don’t own game guides. There are a few in my household that my siblings own, for stuff like Super Mario Sunshine, and I guess technically my Pokedex for Pokemon Black and White 2 DOES double as a game guide. But like, we now live in the age of the internet. If you want to know how to get through something, there are a million articles and Let’s Plays that detail how to complete the base story, find secrets, and even suggest strategies for tackling difficult challenges. Some of these are designed to be informative, and some are more reactionary and built for entertainment, there’s lots of flavors to choose from! 
And it makes me wonder, what does that mean for the medium of game guides as a whole? I think they still have their place. For one thing, different people benefit from different learning styles. Being able to read a guide may work better for someone than a video depending on their brain wiring. And for people who don’t have reliable or frankly any internet, or rely on a library for that, it’s nice to have a book so that you don’t have to wait to keep playing. I’ve never seen anyone get a game guide from a library, but I absolutely think it’s something a library could have. It’s also just really convenient to have all of that information available in one book, as opposed to having to search through multiple forums and sources and risk getting spoiled. And when they’re done well, sometimes they can have secrets not even the existing player base knew. Like I knew that there was this secret about a ghost train that appears if you set your system’s clock to 4:14, but I didn’t know if AM or PM mattered. Thanks to this book, now I know that it doesn’t matter, both work, which is really handy to know! But uh…most of the secrets that were revealed in this book were things I knew within the first month that BATDR came out. None of them were new to me as someone who’s plugged into the world of Bendy. There have been multiple videos detailing how to get these secrets, and how to play this game, by many different indie horror enthusiasts. It almost makes it feel like this book came out a bit too late, and it’s only released about a year or so after this game came out.
Which really begs the question, who was the target audience for this book? Was it for new fans who were struggling with these games? Was it for longtime fans who wanted a memento of the occasion and a record of all the stuff in these games? Was it for lore hunters hungry for new secrets and world building? Having read both versions of the employee handbook, I still can’t definitively say who the target audience is. That kind of frustrates me, that’s the first thing they taught us about back when I went to school for graphic design. It’s important to keep your audience in mind when designing something, that way it caters to their needs, appeals to them, and gets your message across effectively. 
Part 5: Final Thoughts
I still can’t say for sure what I was supposed to get out of this.The parts of it that I found charming and appealing were not continued or built upon in this update. There is no new world building or lore. It doesn’t do an effective job as a game guide given its reliance on non-permanent elements of gameplay. It doesn’t give us tools to cross reference what we know from previous entries, nor does it expand upon details that lacked clarity within BATDR or BATIM. It removed some of its more charming content, and it still has stolen artwork from its previous iteration. By the time I got done reading this book, I was left feeling disappointed and kind of exhausted. No joke, I grabbed a friend, and we went through it all to compare it page by page to see what changed. It was something you could make a drinking game out of, not that I would recommend that. 
I would struggle to recommend this book to any Bendy fan, unless you’re a completionist like me who wants to own every book as a physical copy. The original employee handbook was a far better read, and if you can find a copy secondhand or at your local library, you’re in for a small but tasty treat (quite literally if you decide to make the bacon soup recipe, which fun fact, originated in this book and was developed by the wife of Bookpast, one of the writers on this series!). The Dark Revival section feels tacked on and not as well thought out as the original book was. There is a very odd disconnect between the two. I’m genuinely confused as to why it was put in a rerelease of this book rather than making an entirely new book for Dark Revival. Dark Revival is a much longer and detailed game than Bendy and the Ink Machine. I would expect a book that describes how to play it and its world building to take up a lot more pages and go in depth on different details than this one did. So why was it done this way? Does this have to do with some sort of contract with Scholastic that we don’t know about? Was there a time constraint, or a page count that had to be met that they couldn’t meet with just BATDR? Did the people working on Bendy have too much on their plates to dedicate the time to a new book? What happened here? I wasn’t expecting to leave this book with more questions than answers, but here we are. 
Overall, I don’t think it was worth what I paid for it, but it’s going to live on my shelf with the rest of my books. This will be handy for when I need to reference the audiologs and don’t want to look up a YouTube video to remember what was said. It’ll also be nice if I’m traveling. See, whenever I visit my grandparents, their wifi is pretty limited, so if I want to draw anything while I’m up there, I have to print out references or download images on my phone before I go so I can do that. Having some of the new renders in this book will be useful if I decide I want to draw Bendy stuff or theorize while on the road. 
Now it's your turn. Tell me your thoughts on the Updated Edition of the Bendy Employee Handbook! Is this something you want to read? If you have read it, did you enjoy it? Were you left wanting more? If we ever get another book like this, what sort of things would you like to see? Let's talk about it. And remember, if you did enjoy it, that's not a bad thing, absolutely no judgement there. Just because it wasn't for me doesn't mean it's not going to be enjoyable for someone else. Every work of fiction has its audience. <3 Here's wishing you a wonderful rest of the day, and happy reading!
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bp-zb1fics · 11 months
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A little crazy
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pairing: overprotective bf shanbin x s/o reader
genre: university au on unhingedness (same verse as perils, and no, it's not lasik), fluff
tw/tags: established relationship, some stereotypical characters, hanbin has a few quirks, character study lowkey, unwanted flirting, unintentional flirting, pet names, intimidation, he's sweet but a psycho, drinking, getting a lil tipsy, lowkey stalker vibes but not really, for plot purposes we will find it cute, threatening, idk how to tag this pls tell me if i missed something
wc: 2078
summary: your boyfriend is legitimately the sweetest person ever…except when someone tries to make moves on you. Then he gets…well…
a/n my advanced birthday fic for hanbin! Bc idk why I thought it was today I must have hallucinated but also idk if I have time to post on the actual day bc of real life commitments lmao whoops I struggle and try my best. Shout out to Kara aka @boysplanetmorelike for sparking this lil idea~
Check my pinned for more fics~
It’s not like he was perfect, even if people liked to think he was. Well, yes he is very boyfriend. That’s why he’s your boyfriend.
You, of all people, can attest to the fact he isn’t perfect. You’ve seen his hair in the morning. He’s definitely not at his prettiest. Sometimes he becomes a little control freak. You know that. You’re the one who they call to get him before he makes one of the poor freshmen cry unintentionally and then ends up feeling guilty about it and apologising profusely for the rest of the day, your poor soft-hearted man. And some might argue that yes he has his little ticks but they’re only minor character flaws if they can be considered flaws at all.
If only they knew.
Those who have had the pleasure of getting to know Sung Hanbin on a more, well, personal level are probably the only ones who will ever know. Poor souls, really.
And perhaps it isn’t as effective to explain as it is to show what exactly one of his more problematic personality issues is. Let’s take one unsuspecting, innocent afternoon.
Perspective. You’ve just finished class. It’s a pleasant day. You decide to meet at one of the benches under the trees outside your building. His class finishes a bit after yours so you wait, scrolling through your phone, peaceful, unbothered.
Enter unfortunate victim. For the purpose of this exercise, he shall remain unnamed. We’ll call him Victim #444. Or well, that guy.
He’s your typical fuckboy. Good looking in a sort of lukewarm way, hugely overconfident, probably thinks he has a bigger dick than he actually does, a horrible flirt, we’ve all met that type.
You share a class together. That’s how he makes conversation. Otherwise, he might not dare to approach at that time. Your talk goes something like this.
“Hey, you’re in Choi-seongsaengnim’s class too right?”
“Yeah?” You look up from your phone and he’s just there. He takes a seat on the same bench without asking. Well, it’s public property but he’s a little closer than you would like.
“He’s such a hardass, don’t you think? Like sure, he knows the lesson but he doesn’t need to act like this is the only class we’re taking.”
“Well, I mean-”
“-Like seongsaengnim, come on, I have a life outside of trying to figure out what the fuck your lessons mean.” You can add self-absorbed and stupid to this one’s list of notable traits.
“I think-” And definitely not letting you get a word in.
“Speaking of, have you got a partner for the latest project? Because, you know, I’ve been asked but I’m happy to make an exception if you want to pair up.”
“Actually, I already have-”
“Let me give you my number so we can contact each other? Maybe meet up, you know? I’ve got a nice little place to myself on the other side of campus.”
Ugh, as if. He’s leaning in so close that you can smell his cheap cologne. Before you can get up from the bench, arms wrap around you from the back and a very familiar voice coos in your ear.
“Ahh nae sarang, sorry I’m late.”
You turn your head, leaning into him.
“Hi Binnie-yah.”
He beams at you before directing his stare at the other guy. And so it begins.
“Oh, who’s this?”
You’re pretty sure Hanbin knew who this was. He knew who everyone was and at least one notable thing about them because he was quirky like that. Well, he wasn’t known as the university’s social butterfly for nothing. And you don’t want to spoil his fun so you let the guy introduce himself.
“Ah, you’re taking that major, yeah? So Junho-yah is your senior, how is he these days?”
“Oh, ah yes, Junho-sunbaenim’s been doing well, I don’t really see him around much actually.”
And bingo. The guy starts squirming. Faster than it usually takes. Your boyfriend’s made himself comfortable even though he’s half-hunched over and resting his chin on your shoulder, looking at the other guy with an unwavering stare. Sort of the way a spider would probably look at a fly before, well, you know.
“Really, well last I heard from him, he was complaining about how disrespectful his underclassmen are…but you’re not like that, aren’t you?”
“Ah, no, of course not sunbaenim.”
You can feel Hanbin’s smile get wider, his eyes crinkling in a way that you find adorable but you suspect might not be as cute for your unfortunate companion.
“That’s good, keep up the good work. I can’t imagine how I’d feel if any of my underclassmen were being disrespectful. Ah well, actually I can….”
He pauses and you swear that the guy stops breathing.
“...and I can definitely say that they’ll be very sorry that they even tried that with me.” Hanbin continues cheerily.
Suddenly he walks over and starts patting him on the shoulder. The guy flinches back.
“So next time, remember to be on your best behaviour and keep being polite, hmm? Don’t be so obvious? Maybe try not to be so shameless, yeah?”
“Ah, yes, of course, sunbaenim. Actually I- I just remembered I- I have to go- ah- sorry to disturb um- excuse me-”
You watch as he does a roughly 90 degree bow to both of you before walking off quickly.
“Less than 5 minutes, Binnie, that’s a new record.”
And your cute boyfriend is back, pouting and grabbing at your hands and squeezing them softly. If you were anyone else, you would have gotten whiplash.
“It’s not my fault if I want you all to myself, hmmm?”
Did you mention that your boyfriend was a little off in the head? Not in the should-be-confined-to-the-mental-hospital way but that slight sort of insanity that possesses him when someone tries to go for his little brother (rip Gunwook) or his little sister or his close friends or well, you.
And everyone else? Everyone else was not safe. If murder was legal, literally everyone else would probably be fearing for their lives. Which is probably a good thing that murder isn’t legal. Those incredibly lucky bastards.
Take one of the freshmen trying to chat you up during a party. They’ve been incredibly nice all evening, pouring you drinks and asking you all sorts of thoughtful questions about the major. So yes, you’re very happy to answer and give them little tips on how to ace a certain project.
“And it’s honestly fine if you mess up a little on your first test for Hwang-seongsaengnim’s class, he’s very nice when it comes to students forgetting a few names so don’t stress too much about it and make sure to ace the extra credit he gives.”
“Oh, thank you so much sunbaenim. That’s so helpful, I’ll definitely try my best.”
You can’t help but smile. So cute. Maybe it was the alcohol but you remember how it was like being a wide-eyed, overeager freshman listening attentively to your own seniors.
“It’s really no problem. Ask me anything, anytime. Seriously, don’t be afraid if you need advice.”
You reach over to pat them, swaying just a little from the amount of soju running through your body. They’re awfully red as well. You wonder why.
“How are you getting home, sunbaenim? Do you live nearby? I can walk with you if you’re comfortable with that, I don’t think it’s too safe to be out at this time.”
“Oh it’s no worries, I’ll be taking them home.”
“Ah Hanbinnie, meet my new dongsaeng” you’re not too sure when he got here or even why he’s here but Hanbin’s incredibly warm and his hands around your waist feel so nice. 
“This is my boyfriend.” You introduce him to the freshman. He dips his head in greeting as the other nearly tips over trying to bow. You make a concerned noise, making to catch the other but Hanbin firmly keeps you from moving, letting the freshman catch themselves instead.
“So nice to meet you, we’ll get going if that’s alright. It’s really not safe to be out this late, especially with someone you barely know.” You hardly register your boyfriend’s words but you’re not that drunk that you don’t know the smile he’s giving is about 95% fake and razor-sharp.
“Ah yes, get home safely, sunbaenim. I’ll find my way back so don’t worry.”
“Oh we won’t” You think you hear Hanbin say. Maybe. Could be your imagination. Because the next moment he’s nuzzling at your neck like a very spoiled cat, arms firmly holding you up as he guides you out of the bar and into the car.
“Nae sarang, you really need to take better care of yourself or I won’t want to let you out of my sight.” He says to you softly as he practically carries you into the passenger seat. It’s sweet, well the implication behind it is kinda creepy but you know he doesn’t mean it that way. (Does he?)
“You drove here?”
“Of course, I can’t let you go home all by yourself, can I?”
Like you said, there’s just a tiny screw loose in that head of his, considering the bar where you’re drinking is over an hour away from campus. You chalk it up to it being Hanbin. He can get a little paranoid on occasion. 
And sometimes, he goes a bit psycho. A little. Not a lot. Still, according to Gunwook, it’s terrifying. You really wouldn’t know but you’ve seen it.
You’ve come to wait for his dance club to finish when someone collides into you. It’s not too hard but it still knocks you off your feet and onto the ground with a thud.
“Yah, watch where you’re going, huh? I have a performance next week and I could have injured myself.”
It’s definitely one of the newer members because you don’t recognise them. Before you can say anything, Seo Won, one of the veterans, is already helping you up and asking if you’re okay. The one that knocked you over huffs and is about to say something else when Hanbin calls their name sharply.
Your boyfriend’s eyes narrow and maybe you’re a little lightheaded from the fall but also from the way his shirt clings to his body and his hair weighed down by sweat. It’s kinda hot but you’re not admitting that out loud. Not now, at least. He calls the other member’s name again and gestures him over.
He speaks too quietly for you to hear anything. All you know is that the other’s face pales drastically and he bows several times, walking over and apologising to you before practically hightailing out of the room.
Hanbin’s all over you in a matter of seconds, practically lifting you off the ground. It’s not good for your heart. Seo Won quickly backs off.
“My poor sarang, are you okay? Do you need anything? Ice? Are you bruised anywhere? Let me check.”
You don’t ever see the person who knocked you over again. Ever. You’d wonder about it but you’ve learned that it was better not to question sometimes. Especially when Hanbin insists on carrying you around for the rest of the day and practically waits on you hand and foot until the bruises fade. And it’s just a bruise. You do admit to him later that maybe you find it attractive when he’s a shade pissed and sweaty. Maybe you both get a little sweaty after that. And later, when you’re rightfully tired and sprawled out on top of him, you think about it.
Really, you wonder what goes through his mind sometimes.
[cut scene]
Hanbin smiles, all teeth and no sympathy. It’s like the serial killer before the murder.
“You speak to anyone like that ever again and I can do injuring for you, understood? No, don’t talk, just nod if you’ve managed to get it into that head of yours, hmm?”
A nod. Hanbin likes it when they’re like this. Quiet and white-faced and sweating nervously.
“Now go apologise to them. Sincerely. Like you mean it. And then, get lost. I don’t want to see your face for awhile, yes?”
Another nod. They take one step back and make to turn around.
“Oh wait.”
They freeze.
“Remember. Sincerely, okay? And don’t think I won’t know if it isn’t.”
A final nod.
“Very good. Now go.”
They go. Hanbin sighs. God, you’re going to drive him insane one day. (He already is)
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xoxobuckybarnes · 27 days
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March 2024 Stucky Fics
Completed
Now! That’s What I Call 90’s Slow Jams (Rated: M, Words: 10K) by deadonarrival
Summary: Steve goes home for the wedding of Becca Barnes and while he’s there he runs into his old crush. Her brother. Except now they are both hot as shit. Oh no whatever will happen.
(You Can't Choose) What Stays and What Fades Away (Rated: G, words: 3K) by Taste_is_Sweet
Summary: At some point in everyone's life, the first words their soulmate will ever say to them will appear in deep black writing on their skin. The words fade to light grey when a soulmate dies. Sometimes new words replace them, whether they're wanted or not (These were the words Steve was born with, running in a messy, uneven line across his skinny little chest, beneath both his collarbones: You okay, pal? Those jerks didn't hurt ya too bad, did they? Steve woke up from the ice in 2011 with the words, Who the hell is Bucky? circling his heart, in printing so precise it barely looked human. Steve hated them.)
For Words to Say it Right (Rated: T, Words: 25K) by Squeaky & Taste_is_Sweet
Summary: Turns out when you're missing an arm, everyone asks are you okay? all the damn time. And when your soulmark is one of the most common questions in English, it's even worse. Generic soulmarks are a bitch.
Lost Vocabularies that Might Express (The Memory of These Broken Impressions) (Rated: M, Words: 111K) by dorian_burberrycanary / @burberrycanary
Summary: The worst of times, like the best, are always passing away. How’s that for some consolation on the road? A post-The Falcon and The Winter Soldier Stucky fix-it as part of the all-American road trip, detours included.
The Simple Life (Rated: E, Words: 114K) by howler32557038
Summary: "The simple life." "You'll get there one day." "I don't know. Family, stability...The guy who wanted all that went in the ice seventy-five years ago. I think someone else came out." Bucky wants to be part of Steve's life. He wants to be an Avenger. He wants to be a good partner. Unfortunately, sometimes that means not telling Steve everything.
WIP
a league of our own (Rated: E, Current Words: 40K) by burning_brighter / @burnin-brighter
Summary: Steve's sixteen-year-old son's one and only dream is to play in the Major League. He thinks he has a shot when the team get a new coach, retired MLB legend and Steve's high school crush, Bucky Barnes. Steve hasn't thought of the man in many years, but seeing him brings back many memories that push Steve to reach out to an old friend and maybe make new ones on the way. What happens when Steve gets to know Bucky properly? What happens when they open up about their darkest secrets and deepest fears? There's really only one thing that can happen.
hey now, you're an all star (get your game on, go play) (Rated: E, Current Words: 81K) by buckyismybicycle / @buckyismybicycle
Summary: Boston Bruins trade notorious party animal/human disaster Bucky Barnes to the Dallas Stars, and captain Steve Rogers is not impressed when Fury puts him on babysitting duties. But, as he gets to know Bucky - really gets to know Bucky - he wonders if maybe the media has got it all wrong - very, very wrong. PS - you do not need to know hockey for this, I promise.
Every Me and Every You (Rated: E, Current Words: 60K) by deadto27 / @deadto27
Summary: Bucky Barnes is doing his best. He's getting by after the blip, after Sam became Captain America, after Steve...well, it's best he doesn't think about that. The point is, his life is different now, and he's trying his best. He just wishes the hollow feeling in his chest would go away. ----- Bucky gets blinded by a bright light as the tear seems to implode in on itself and there’s an odd little jolt as the pulling stops, and then Bucky’s blinking, trying to get his vision right again as he loosens his grip on America. “You okay?” he checks, still squinting. He’s probably not blind, he thinks. It just feels like it right now. “I’m okay,” America tells him and he sees her nod shakily as his vision starts to clear, and he carefully lets go of her, seeing that she can support herself, hands pressing onto the floor next to her. “Uh…I don’t think I am,” says another voice, and Bucky turns his head so fast he might give himself whiplash. Because he knows that voice. He knows that voice better than any other voice on the planet and he’s missed that voice
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m1lflov3rrr · 8 months
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Fetish - Marilyn Thornhill
1 - a new beginning
<3
Warnings: anxiety/panic attack
Word count: 3.3k
A/N: Soooo excited to be finally able to post this!!!!!!! Aahhhhhh!!!
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You were on the verge of a panic attack. Your bus had taken you to Jericho, and you had just missed the other bus that was supposed to take you to Nevermore. 
You were new to the town. Your home was several states away, but your parents had decided it would be the best for you to attend the boarding school they'd read about. Nevermore Academy, a school for outcasts. You thought it was an absurd idea to send you there, as you were, in fact, not an outcast. 
There were outcasts in your family. Mostly psychics. Your mother, your father, your grandparents... But not you. The gene had skipped you. Even though no one ever said anything mean about it, especially your parents, you knew everyone was disappointed. How they all had expected you to turn out a skilled psychic - nothing. 
You sometimes even thought that you and your incompetence were the reason your parents had divorced all those years ago. Of course they'd assure you it was not, but you couldn't stop overthinking it. Just like you couldn't stop overthinking everything. You were like that - overanalyzing everything and never feeling like you were enough. 
Just like now you were overthinking how you'd never get into that academy, how you'd fail again and end up dead in a ditch- 
Stop it, Y/N. You're doing it again, you repeated over and over in your head. 
You closed your eyes and took a deep breath, attempting to calm yourself down. You had to think rationally. You were in a foreign small town all alone with no sense of direction. 
You should ask someone for help. Small town people were usually nice. 
You spotted a cozy-looking cafe across the street, nodded to yourself and walked towards it with your bags and your suitcase. After stumbling your way inside with basically your whole life packed into those bags, you took a sigh and had a look around. It was a small and neat place, maybe you'd go there again on a less hectic day. It wasn't crowded at all, with only a few booths by the window occupied. 
You decided not to bother the customers, and instead made your way to the front desk, there was a young boy working and surely he'd help. 
He raised his gaze up to you and smiled awkwardly, "Good evening, miss. What can I get you?" 
You stepped a little closer, as you knew that back home everyone wasn't so... accepting, of outcasts. You didn't know Jericho's situation, but decided to play safe. "Uh, yes. Do you happen to know where the Nevermore Academy is? I was supposed to be there already but I missed my bus and have absolutely no clue where to go." You rambled, but still with a low tone of voice. 
The boy raised his eyebrows, looking rather surprised, and you internally slapped yourself. He must hate you now. 
But soon enough, his face turned into an understanding one. "Yes, I do actually. Would you like me to take you there?" He offered and you beamed in joy. 
"Yes, oh, thank you so much!" You said, almost jumping at how giddy you were. Maybe you wouldn't end up dead in a ditch. But your face soon turned stern and serious, "I will not forget this." You said, attempting to sound as grateful as possible. 
He smiled, "Okay, well, my shift unfortunately ends at 10pm, I'm really sorry I wish I could drive you there earlier." 
You checked your phone. 8:30pm. You could handle it. "S'okay. As long as I get there somehow." 
"Would you like to have a coffee? It's on the house." He offered.
"Yes, that would be great. Thank you, uhm- sorry, what was your name?" 
"Tyler. Tyler Galpin. And what is yours?" 
"Y/N. Y/N L/N." 
-
Tyler drove you to Nevermore as promised. When he parked, you looked anxious and conflicted. 
"I could escort you inside? I know the place, I actually come here by a lot since I know some people here." 
You widened your eyes, "Really? That would be great, thank you so much!" 
He nodded and you got out of the car, he politely took your bags and suitcase although you insisted in carrying them yourself. 
The halls were quiet and empty as it was almost 10:30pm now. You had no idea where to go, as this was definitely not an appropriate hour to be meeting the headmistress. But you didn't question anything yet, you just followed Tyler as he seemed to know what to do. You walked along the halls until he came to a halt at a door, seemingly to a classroom but you weren't too sure. "Uh, Tyler? Are you sure we're... allowed to be here?" You questioned. 
He chuckled at you, knocking on the door and going inside, you hesitantly following him. 
The place was almost as dark as the Autumn sky at this hour, but you noticed a small lamp light up by a desk in the front. You spotted desks to its opposite, this must be a class, you thought. Even though you couldn't see that much in there, you did notice the tall trees and the potted plants nearest to you. It was a serene place, you certainly would enjoy coming here. 
"Tyler? What are you doing here?" An unkwown woman from behind you asked, making you flinch and turn around with wide eyes. 
You couldn't see her, at all. She was standing in a shadowy corner. 
"Ms Thornhill, I believe I've found a lost student of yours. Well, a new student. She came by the Weathervane, asking where the academy is so I brought her here." Tyler explained, now bringing all the attention to you. You couldn't have been more nervous. 
The woman stepped forward, now causing the faint desk light to show herself. She was absolutely beautiful with her auburn hair and warm, brown eyes. 
Okay, stop it, Y/N. She's probably your teacher, pull your shit together. Your inner monologue scolded you and you agreed. You shouldn't be thinking like that of your possibly new teacher. 
The woman looked at you with an intrigued expression, with her head slightly tilted and her eyes narrowed. You felt like you were being judged. But all that washed away when soon, a huge grin plastered all over her face. 
"Well, hello there! You must be Y/N, Principal Weems actually informed me about your arrival today, it's nice to meet you. I'm your dorm mom, Marilyn Thornhill!" She introduced herself, offering her hand for you to shake. 
And you did, smiling lightly at her, "Yes, I'm Y/N, Y/N L/N. It's very nice to finally be here, thanks to Tyler. Without him I'd probably still be somewhere in Jericho, panicking my guts." You said with a small chuckle. 
She frowned in confusion, "What do you mean, did something happen?" 
You smiled awkwardly, "Well, I actually missed the bus that was supposed to drive me here, but luckily I went to the local cafe and Tyler was there to save the day." 
She raised her eyebrows and looked at Tyler, who nodded, confirming your words. Her gaze turned back to you and you smiled nervously at her. And something in her expression softened. 
"Thank you, Tyler, I'll take it from here. Let's get you to your dorm, sweetheart." 
Your cheeks developed a faint red at the petname, but gladly it was too dark in the conservatory for her to see. You turn to Tyler, "Thank you so much for saving my life. I owe you." 
He chuckled, "It's alright. I better get going before my father starts wondering where I am. Have a good one!" 
After the boy had left, you went over to where he had left your bags to pick them up. But right before you could take the bags, a hand on your wrist stopped you. 
"Ah, ah. Let me carry those, you must be tired." She insisted, sending you a look which left you no room to argue. You slightly nodded as you wacthed her pick up your bags with surprising strength. 
You began following her through the empty halls like a lost puppy, you didn't speak much but the silence wasn't uncomfortable. 
Soon enough, you stopped at a door and she searched for a key in her pocket, opening the door. "I'm sorry, sweetie, but you don't have a roommate. All the dorms were full already so you're going to be alone in here." She explained almost sadly, carrying your bags inside and suddenly rubbing your bicep comfortingly. 
You flinched a bit at the sudden touch and your cheeks instantly grew hot, which didn't go unnoticed by the woman. You saw how her eyes looked at you weirdly, but not exactly in a bad way, and how her lips parted just the slightest bit. 
You had no clue what her gaze meant, but it was piercing through you. 
"I- it's alright, Ms Thornhill. I prefer solitude anyway." 
She smiled softly, "By the way, welcome to Opheila Hall. As I said before, I'm also your dorm mom, meaning you can come to me about anything and everything whenever you need, sweeatheart, okay?" 
You nodded and avoided her gaze. Wrong move, apparently. She gripped you chin and forced you to look in her eyes, you only now noticed how close you were standing, her touch was sending shivers down your spine. 
"Use your words, sweet girl." She cooed, making you hazy at the attention and her way with words. 
"I- yes, thank you, Ms Thornhill. I uh, I better start unpacking." You rambled, embarassed at how you were stuttering just because of her touch. 
She chuckled, "Right, I'll leave you be. I'll stop by tomorrow morning so we can go to Principal Weems together to retrieve your schedule, uniform and everything else necessary." 
You nodded as you walked around the small dorm, observing it and thinking of how you'd decorate it to look cozy. "Yes, thank you so much, Ms Thornhill. And sorry again for arriving this late," 
She smiled as you spoke, "Don't apologize, honey. You did nothing wrong. Oh, and just to go over by a few rules, lights out at 10, and no boys, ever." 
-
The next day you woke up, smiling lightly at the newly decorated dorm. It had pretty stringlights hung up everywhere, creating a magical atmosphere, there were some of your favorite books set on your desk neatly, hou hung up pretty and slightly transparent white curtains on the windows to add more life into the previously empty room. In your opinion, the bed was the best thing. You had several cozy blankets, decorated pillows and a few plushies. Above it were also some hung stringlights. 
You really loved how the room turned out. 
Giddy about your new home, you quickly got out of bed and went into the ensuite bathroom in your dorm. You brushed your teeth and washed your face. You quickly did yor hair and applied some makeup before going over to your closet. 
It was your first day here, you wanted to make a good first impression. You ended up choosing your favorite outfit. 
You didn't know what you should do, but you wanted to explore the school. You decided you'd go and see if Ms Thornhill was in the conservatory (because you completely forgot she was supposed to come to you). 
You left your dorm and wandered around the school, trying to remember the way to your dorm. The school was a labyrinth. 
You came to an outdoor area which was filled with students. You felt several pairs of eyes on you, which was pretty expected but still made you feel a pang of anxiety in your chest and made you cross your arms. You were quite a social person, but new situations like these still weren't your piece of cake. 
A hand on your shoulder interrupted your thoughts. You jumped a little as you turned around to meet a excited-looking blonde who must've been the same age as you. She had blue and pink highlights in her hair and the biggest ear-to-ear smile you'd ever seen on anyone. 
There was a raven-haired girl next to the blonde, the mere opposite of her friend. Where the first girl looked like she was on top of the world, the other girl looked like she'd kill you without hesitation if you ever messed with her or her friend. 
"Hi!! I'm Enid Sinclair, you must be new here, what's your name??!" The blonde was almost jumping with joy, and her easy-going demeanor really eased up the situation. 
You smiled, "Y/N L/N, nice to meet you too. And yeah, I'm very much new here, I arrived just last night." 
You turned to look at the gloomy girl next to the blonde. She was glaring at me, but offered her hand anyway after Enid nudged her slightly. You shook her hand and she introduced herself, "Wednesday Addams. It's a pleasure." 
You nodded with a smile. 
"Y/N, would you like if we showed you around here? I know it can be hard to find places when you're here for the first time." Enid offered. 
"Really? That would be amazing," You beamed, ignoring Wednesday's glares towards Enid for suggesting such thing. 
You began following the two girls around the school. They showed you the cafeteria, told you that the outdoors area was called the quad, which you honestly thought was weird but didn't say anything. After about an hour of walking around the school and trying to remember the right paths to certain places. 
"So, Y/N, what type of an outcast are you?" Enid asked after showing you to the library, Wednesday following close behind. 
Your cheeks flushed and you felt an uncomfortable twist in your stomach - you were afraid they'd abandon you instantly if they found out about you being a normie. You sighed as you already accepted your fate, and reluctantly spoke. "Actually, I'm not an outcast. All of my family is, psychics to be exact, but I'm not. I guess the good gene really decided to skip on me." You closed your eyes as you felt the tears pricking in your eyes. 
But to your utter shock, neither of them made a snarky comment or looked at you in a disgusted way. Instead, you felt two arms hugging you tight. Enid wrapped you in her arms and whispered just so the three of you heard- "Don't worry, Y/N, this won't change our opinions about you. We know you're unique, whether you have any psychic abilities or not. You're a special girl, Wednesday here said so." 
You looked at the raven-haired girl in shock. You didn't expect she'd say something so nice of you so quickly. She just nodded her head in confirmation before quickly looking away to hide her embarassment. 
You smiled softly at them, feeling a sense of calm washing over you. "Thank you, guys. It really means a lot. Uhh, could you possibly show me the way back to my dorm? I think I may have already forgotten." 
"Yeah, sure!" Enid exclaimed happily before you three were again on your way. 
You took extra note of the hallways leading to your dorm. You did luckily catch onto these type of things pretty easily so it wasn't that hard. 
You were so caught up in talking with Enid that as you rounded a corner, you bumped into someone. You closed your eyes and were ready to fall, but to your surprise, you didn't. You felt a pair of strong hands around your waist, keeping you up and steady. 
"Woah, there!" Ms Thornhill chuckled, but soon furrowed her eyebrows in worry, "Honey, where were you? I thought I was supposed to come and get you so we could go to the principal together?"
You widened your eyes as you realized, you had forgot.
"Oh my god, Ms Thornhill, I'm so sorry, I really didn't mean to, I-I was-" You started rambling nervously. 
She huffed on a soft laughter, still her hands were on your waist even though you were standing up straight now. You blushed furiously and that didn't go unnoticed by the woman. 
"Sweetie, calm down. I was never mad at you, I was just worried, okay?" She said gently, squeezing your waist assuringly before letting go. And for some reason, you immediately missed the contact. 
"Okay," You whispered, almost forgetting how Wednesday and Enid were still standing beside you, observing the interaction you had with the redhead. 
"So, are you ready to go to Principal Weems now? Come on, I'll go with you, bye girls!" She linked your arms and pulled you away from your new friends. 
You quickly waved to the girls before disappearing around the corner. 
You suddenly got extremely nervous about meeting the principal, how angry she must've been at you for not showing up. You're nothing but a burden to everyone, you shouldn't even be here in the first place. 
You stopped dead in your tracks, and Ms Thornhill, who still had her arm linked to yours, stopped abruptly too, turning around with confusion all over her face. 
She furrowed her brows, "Sweetheart? Is everything okay?" 
You pursed your lips together and looked around to see if there was any way to escape the uncomfortable situation. You tried your best to avoid eye contact with the teacher, which only grew her more worried. There were a few students in the hallway, which only made you more anxious. Ms Thornhill noticed this, as she quickly placed her hand on your lower back and walked you to a more secluded corner. 
Your breathing picked up and you could only think of how it would all come crashing down before it even started. 
"Hey, honey, I'm right here, you're safe with me, okay?" Ms Thornhill tried to assure you with a patient smile. 
"No, no, I can't, m'sorry-" You rambled as you still were trying to blink your tears away. 
"Hey, hey, listen to me, can you be a good girl and do that for me?" She whispered, causing your breath to hitch in your throat at the good girl and your attention shifted onto her and her words. You vigorously nodded through your ragged breaths. 
"Such a good girl, now, breath with me. One in, one out, just do as I do, okay?" And that nickname absolutely made something surprisingly pleasant on fire in your abdomen. 
You nodded again as you watched her chest inflate and deflate again and again, and you did the same, following her movements. 
If you weren't in such a state right now, you would've noticed Marilyn's amused but attentive eyes set on you as you kept on looking at her chest. 
Over and over again, in and out, and it started to help. You weren't in a state of panic anymore, you felt surprisingly good. She really had helped you. Taking in a last big breath in and out, you sighed in content as you had finally calmed yourself down. 
Ms Thornhill smiled tenderly and cupped your cheek with one of her hands, soothing her thumb across it. You smiled lightly as well. 
"You did very well, dear. I'm proud of you." 
You nodded to assure yourself everything was okay now. 
"Do you think you'll be able to go see Principal Weems now? You don't have to if you don't feel like it. But I'll be there with you if you want to go, okay?" She gently spoke. 
You thought for a second and then nodded, "Yeah, I think I'm ready to go," 
She smiled softly as she linked your arms again. 
If only you’d have known that this was the beginning of something so incredibly disastrous.
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lakesbian · 10 months
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stirring aisha around in my brain soup pot. there's like zero textual anything for this because wildbow isn't even capable of not objectifying her himself but btwn triggering from fear of rape + various unspecified abusive stepdads + the inherent trauma of being societally sexualized and fetishized as a black girl who, like, Exists and also god forbid enjoys wearing shorts sometimes plus the whole neglect and the thing where the one family member she's really close to only knows how to protect her by controlling her and the sense of being an unwanted nuisance to society in general because of the disability. she is really sooo about wanting to be accurately perceived and wanted but being terrified of being seen wrong & consumed. aisha laborn my girl. anyway i don't have a point to this i just wish wildbow connected the dots and wrote her good. i also wish his dumb ass didn't not only pull the narrative equivalent of the black man dying first (black boy's arc kersploding and shitting itself first) but then have his own damn sister not give a single shit abt him. but i digress it feels tangentially related to her problems disorders that after her loved ones die, w/ the exception of her own brother whom she does not care about because wildbow is insane and needs to be strung up and pelted with tomatoes, she insists on making sure that they're Perceived And Treated Right. alec's first memorial very pointedly capturing the essence of him, particularly the tragedy of his life that everyone else missed, placed where people can't Not look at it, alec's second memorial being faithfully rendered dolls (my doll imagery boy ♥) she insists on people taking care of, her being very vehement about people not disrespecting or misunderstanding taylor's memory, etc. would love to come up with what she does for brian in secret good worm where wildbow doesn't shit the bed everywhere but i haven't thought of anything yet unfortunately. well. i am leaning towards the previously stated memorial leather jacket & hairstyle + her just like. perpetually loudly insisting that he was The Specialest Best Big Brother Ever if anyone ever speaks critically about him. not because he wasn't flawed but as sort of a "fuck you you WILL appreciate how hard he tried only I get to be mean to brian." i digress it's very Augh Ough how she insists on making sure that what's happened to her, the misperception & obscurity she's afraid of, never happens to her loved ones. quite frankly one of the characters of all time ever. aisha laborn rectangular prism. this originally started as a post about why redditors are wrong about shipping aisha and alec but then i started thinking other things so now it is not about that.
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flightfoot · 2 months
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Can you recommend angsty fics which don't revolve around the main duo?
Hope you like these! I avoided fics that revolved around either Marinette or Adrien.
---
Can’t Sleep Either, Huh? by EmeraldButterfly
Chloe gets up late at night. Turns out she’s not the only one who’s worried about Pollen. (AU where former Miraculous holders have an empathetic link with their kwamis)
This is a very interesting AU. Chloe and Zoe are both able to feel Pollen’s emotions and even things like her hunger, and end up taking solace in each other to try and cope. It’s just really sweet.
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oh, no, not again by @bittersweetresilience
Félix doesn’t want to broach the subject, but he won’t be able to after they leave.
So this is a glimpse into a time-travel fix-it story, with various wielders being sent back into their younger selves. But Felix doesn’t think he’ll be helpful, because well… his backstory. He would be unable to step out of line. It’s pretty angsty and I love Chat’s reaction to learning about how bad Felix had it.
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Changeling by @unecoccinellenoire
Gabriel makes the Wish believing that he regretted everything with Adrien. The results suggest that he in fact regrets Adrien
So this is interesting. It’s giving a glimpse into a universe where Gabriel and Emilie never found the Peacock Miraculous, and they (along with Amelie and Colt) just adopted. Which unfortunately meant that Adrien and Felix as we know them never existed, and Gabriel finds that he misses his original son, which is especially acute when interacting with his new adopted son and knowing how much he’s NOT Adrien.
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Late Bloomer by @generalluxun
On what might very well be the last night of her life, Sabrina Raincomprix pulls out a very special scrapbook, pressed between the pages is the past, the past she has never shared with anyone. She relives how she got to this moment one page at a time, preparing herself for the end. A phone call interrupts her self-imposed exile and brings news that could change her life forever. Even if it does though the question looms… change it how?
Sabrina-centric Hanahaki AU here! I love how it goes into Sabrina’s relationship with Chloe over the years, the good and the bad - and even what happens post Revolution. 
I love the description of some of the plants involved, and what they mean, what they represent. If you want a fic that delves more in Sabrina’s character and her relationship with Chloe, this is a solid choice.
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Spread Your Wings by @myladynoire
Set before the Finale. Félix uses his Kwagatama to summon his father’s memory and has a talk with him.
I love Colt’s characterization here, how we see his mindset, his beliefs, and even what made him the way he is. We have a limited amount of knowledge about him in canon, only having the play Felix and Kagami put on to go off of, but myladynoire made good use of it! I’m glad Felix got some closure here as well.
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Eat, Pray, Duck by @trishacollins
Gabriel Agreste split his twin sons apart when his wife died, keeping one with him and sending one to London with his sister. Unfortunately, the Supreme was not willing to let this be. He wanted a matched set. Felix is a weapon, a servant of the Supreme. On a mission to retrieve the stolen Miraculous. In a world that has outlawed kindness, sometimes the most dangerous person is the one who chooses it anyway.
I love this glimpse at what might have been going on with Felix back in Shadybug and Claw Noir’s world, I did wonder what might have been going on with him. Poor kid, he managed to have it even worse than he did in canon. I really loved seeing his interactions with Luka, the Couffaines rebel through kindness it seems!
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Trapped by @consistent-chaos-corporation
Felix asks to visit Adrien as soon as his father is gone. Gabriel catches him snooping, looking for Adrien’s Amok. Everything gets worse from there.
Damn, poor Felix. He came to try and help Adrien, but instead Gabriel stole his Amok, forcing him to obey his commands, holding him prisoner in his basement for months. If you want some quality Felix whump, this is the fic for you!
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Justifying the Means by @ashes-555
When the worst happens, Alya finds that she may be willing to do the unthinkable. Is any sacrifice to big to make for her friends?
Once again, Ashes comes out swinging with an Alya focused fic! 
Basically, there’s a major, destructive akuma attack. During it, Ladybug orders Chat to cataclysm a building in order to stop from being trapped. Unfortunately the building collapses, injuring or killing a lot of people - unbeknownst to her, including Chat Noir. Gabriel releases the akuma, which means she has no way of fixing the damage, either.
A lot of of focus is placed on Alya and Nino worrying over Adrien, who was found in the wreckage barely clinging to life, in a coma, with the doctors unsure whether he’d make it. Shadow Moth takes advantage of their distress to make an offer: if he gets the Ladybug and Black Cat Miraculouses, he can make a Wish to fix everything, including saving Adrien. With as dark a place as Alya and Nino are in, they seriously consider it. Especially with how unhappy both of them are with Chat Noir supposedly “abandoning” Ladybug and Paris as a whole, and Nino being angry with Ladybug for failing (since Alya knows that Marinette is Ladybug, she’s far more understanding on that front).
I love how much credence Alya’s thought and emotions are given here, and that she doesn’t go for the more drastic option right away, either - she talks with Ladybug about it first, tries to do it her way. She understands the costs, but... her friends are important to her, and she’s desperate. I think this was a really good way to present a more antagonistic sort of Alya. She’s still very much herself here, and still considers Marinette her friend, willing to do things her way to an extent, and understanding why Marinette doesn’t want to use the Wish, even though she disagrees with her. Alya’s mindset, her emotions, her problems, are given respect and credence by the narrative. She’s still willing to talk things out, she’s still sympathetic to Marinette and the enormous trauma and guilt she’s going through, she just disagrees with Marinette’s approach. She wants her friend back.
If you want a fic that has some solid focus on Alya as a person, on her emotional struggles and mindset and just... dealing with things, I highly recommend checking out “Justifying the Means”.
---
I Won’t Let You by @generalluxun
After Gabriel’s defeat, two individuals not party to the celebration run into each other, and find each other.
The summary doesn’t give much of an idea of what the fic’s about. Post-Hawkmoth Defeat, Chloe and Felix run into each other at the celebration of Gabriel’s downfall, and vent about their problems. Neither of them think the other one has it too bad - Chloe’s worried about disappearing, since her worth was entirely tied to her family’s prestige and wealth, and being seen as friends to a terrorist is gonna cripple both of those, while Felix is on edge about Ladybug having the Peacock Miraculous, since she has the ability to kill him at a moment’s notice (yes this is a Sentifelix fic). 
They both make each other understand the turmoil the other is going through in extremely visceral ways, showing the other what it’s like to be them, in the circumstances they’re in. I don’t want to spoil what, exactly, they do, but needless to say, it’s worth a read.
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stayandot8 · 10 months
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For Your Eyes Only
Genre: fluff
Relationship type: established boyfriend/girlfriend
Important Contents: Hiiiiiiiii I'm back! I've been so stuck with real life things that I haven't really been writing anything but my series and then I saw this in my ideas an it kinda just all hit me at once so I just wrote it down and now it's yours. I hope you haven't missed me too much ;) Hopefully part 3 of JOY will be done soon and I can give it to you, I'm dying to get it done and post it so you can see where I want to take it. But anyways, here's this one. I hope you like it. ♥
WC: 1.2k
masterlist
“No, everything’s fine. It’s fine.” He would start with himself every few minutes, repeating those same words over and over until he would fall silent again. The screen on my phone had long since blackened out, lucky for my boyfriend that my phone had been charging all night for exactly this occasion. He was always working while he was away, the occasional clicking of his keyboard the only sign of life on the other side of the static. He never took a break, never sat still long enough unless he was required to.
“Chris, didn’t you just get off stage?” My voice was groggy, being the middle of the night in my time zone starting to weigh on my eyelids more and more the longer we talked. The silk of my own sheets had grown foreign, unfamiliar compared to the worn, cotton sheets of Chan’s bed. I practically lived over there now, half his dresser drawers had my things in them. His shared bathroom had four drawers next to the sink, which now held Chan’s hairbrush and my collection of face masks that he liked to do with me. My toothbrush was kept in a travel case tucked in with a small hairbrush of my own, kept safely away from Chan’s serums and vitamins he needed to keep himself healthy. 
“You know the only reason I ever slow down is because you force me to. I don’t feel like I can  unless I’m being told to by a very pretty girl who threatens to sit on me unless I step away from my computer. Not that I would mind that…” His voice trails off, his lingering suggestiveness sending shivers straight down my back. 
“Well, unfortunately I’m not there to threaten you to sleep. I’m stuck behind this device that lets me talk to you when you’re so far from me.” I tucked my blanket even further under my chin, itching for the comfort of his warmth while settling for the empty space. 
“Yes, how dare you be so far from me.” Hearing his smile through his words was the only way I knew he was okay. With all his work piling up all the time, it was the little things I had to look for as signals. 
“Why are you working right now if you just got off stage though, baby? Come lay down with me.” 
“What were you saying before? Why were you saying everything’s fine?”
“What do you mean?”
“Before, you kept saying everything’s fine, that it was okay.”
“Oh, did I? I didn’t even notice. Don’t worry about it, it’s…”
“FIne?”
A pause. “Yeah.” He sighed, deflating. 
“Chris?”
“Yeah?”
“Talk to me?” A longer pause.
“I just don’t want to dump it all on you. It’s my weight to carry, not yours.”
“You might think that but that’s not how I feel. That’s what a partnership is. Your bullshit is my bullshit, so to speak. And my bullshit is your bullshit. Do you feel like I’m dumping on you when I tell you what’s happening at work?”
“No, not at all. I love when you tell me that stuff.”
“Exactly. So lay it all on me. Let me carry some of your bullshit. Or else you’ll be crushed by the weight of it. Please? I want to hear it. It helps me feel close to you when I can’t be right there with you all the time. I want it all, I want the good stuff and the bad stuff. Show me everything. Every bad thought, everything you couldn’t and can’t show anyone else. That’s what I'm here for.”
This silence was different, like he was collecting his thoughts to finally let them tumble out. 
“It’s just hard, ya know? Sometimes it feels like it’s all on me. Like our success depends just on me. And I know it doesn’t, but sometimes it feels like that.” And on and on he went, telling me about the depth of the weight on his shoulders, how his relationships have been suffering because of it. His parents always tell him how proud they are, but it never quite feels the same. 
“I miss them, so much it hurts me when they call. But I barely have time to talk because of the amount of work piling up. The public decisions that need to be made, the tracks that still need to be done, things it feels like only I can do so it’s only on me.”
“You haven’t told any of them this, have you.” It wasn’t a question, really. I knew he wouldn’t because-
“No, I don’t want them to have to worry about this stuff.” There it is.
“Baby, you can’t keep all of this to yourself though. They’re grown adults, they can handle it. You have to trust them enough to know that. They’ve asked, haven’t they? I know they have. Let them carry some of the load. It may have started as your group, you may have put it together but it’s all of yours now. It’s time to share the responsibility, Chris. It’s okay. You’re allowed to lighten your load, even if it’s bit by bit.” 
He took a deep inhale and let it out. “If I could fly, I’d be coming right back home to you.”
“It’s where you belong.”
“You’re like the other half of me that got taken and then just put into another person. I'm only at this comfort level with you." I heard the sheets rustle as he finally laid down. I smiled at that thought.
“I’m missing half of me when we’re apart.” 
“And it makes me sad, my love.”
“Just get through this next month and then we’ll take a week off and go anywhere you want, just the two of us.” It was a nice idea, knowing he would agree then it wouldn’t happen because he would get bored and start working again anyways. But I could dream.
“Yeah, I’d like to explore around here some more if I could. Take pictures of everything I would want to show you and send them to you. You’d love it here.”
“Where are you guys again?”
“Jakarta.”
‘Well, if you do get a day off there, find something you can bring home. Add it to my ever-growing collection.” I glanced over at my own dresser, filled with trinkets of things he would bring back for me from every place he went for work. Little figurines, patches of beautiful cloth, necklaces and chains with pendants attached all scattered the top. I had made a new open spot for whatever he would bring me this time, not knowing how big or long of a space it would need. 
“I’ve already got it for you. I think you’re really going to love it.” His voice was getting deeper now, his words becoming slower as they reached my ears. 
“Oh yeah? Are you going to tell me anything else or do I have to guess?”
“I’m not telling you anything, you’re just going to have to be patient.” The smirk was palpable through the speaker of my phone. I shook my head as much as I could with my cheek flat against my pillow. 
“You’re so rude.”
“I miss you too.”
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mrsjavierp · 4 months
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Where you belong?
Chapter 5 - Die For You
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Javier Peña x latin!f!reader
Summary: Running away from life as you always knew to start a new position as Head Chief on a DEA Office, far away, on Colombia. There, you'll face violence, as you never thought you could. There, you'll meet Javier Peña, your stubborn agent...
Warnings (to the whole fic): +18!, angst, smut, cheating, last relationships, drug dealing - Narcos Universe (not so accurate), bad spanish, english is my second language, use of Y/N and Y/LN. No physical description of the reader, only your clothes (sometimes). The POVs are shifting between reader (first person and Narrator - 3rd person)
(If I forgot anything, tell me, pls!)
Word Count: 2.4k
A/N:
So, I'm using narcos universe, but screwing up the timeline because we need plots and things for our couple. Nevertheless, just a warning for the accuracy of the series. Btw, I'd love to know about you're thinking about it so far! Your opinion is really important! Tks <3
**
Y/N's POV - 1st Person
After an investigation we did together with the CIA and the Mili Group, we finally had proof about La Catedral. 
Steve, Javier and I were discussing the possibilities and what Noonan would authorize. At the end, I knew what to do first: talk to Gaviria.
We were running against time and Escobar again...
"Yes, ambassador. I know it's risky... But I know we can screw that MF and try to bring Escobar to the US. I'll talk to Gaviria, let me handle it." 
Noonan sighed, I finally won.
"Don't disappoint me, Y/LN. You've done a hell of a job in NYC and have been doing it in Colombia. We trust you. You've got a backup plan?"
"Yes. Already on it, even with plan A working. We're not stopping until we get the motherfucker."
"Good luck, keep me posted."
I called Steve and Peña to my office. 
"I'm heading to Bogota. I need to talk to Gaviria in person about it all."
"I'm going with you, jefe." - Javier said.
"No need to. As a matter of fact, I need you both here... We need to be ready to all that'll happen to La Catedral. My gut is feeling really bad."
They both knew what it meant: bad things for sure. My gut were never wrong, unfortunately. Sometimes early, but never wrong.
*
When I tried to reach, none of them were available.
Something is off... I reached even for Connie and she lied to my face. I'm gonna chop someone's head off.
When I arrived back at the office, my head was spinning: 
An informant confirmed Moncada’s and Galeano's deaths a few days ago, meaning that Escobar was losing his senses.  Was that the La Catedral effect? What will be his next move? The Colombian media were, by the way, publicizing it badly. Noonan would fuck me and the rest of the DEA, probably, if she didn't got fired before that. I knew how the US thought about it. And, the cherry on top: Javier and Steve missing.
I was really fucking overwhelmed. 
A couple of hours later, while I was tracing possible steps for Escobar, trying to think like him, Steve showed up at my office. 
"Murphy, what the fuck? Where the fuck were you?"
At the same time, Javier barged in: "Y/LN, I've gotta talk to you, it's urgent! I think Steve..."
"Hey, man."
"Peña, close this fucking door now!" - I yelled, furious.
I turned on the TV.
"Watch it: it's a fucking disaster. The Colombian army is outside La Catedral, Sandoval just entered... Brace yourselves."
They looked at each other, in silence.
"Here's what I think and what I'm doing: I'm suspending both of you, for a week. Stay low. I know you both tipped the media. Major Wysession told me about what you asked him, Peña... Don't you ever do that again. When I arrived here, I told all of the DEA to be straight with me and I'd be straight with you... Don't go to Wysession or Noonan or anyone. Come to me. I'll handle it. And Murphy, let me guess, Cali? Co-operation proposal?"
Steve swallowed hard.
Javier turned his face away from me.
I poured a glass of whiskey for myself.
"You better hope that Noonan doesn't get me fired."
"Y/LN, yes. Cartel de Cali kidnapped me. They didn't like that we helped kill a few of them, but apparently there was someone innocent among them..."
His words faded away as the TV announced about Escobar's escape.
*
Narrator's POV
Escobar ran off again. 
Noonan got... A nice retirement.
You maintained your position, since Crosby knew and liked how you worked, but didn't stop you from hearing a bunch of shit.
You send Peña and Murphy to check La Catedral, but nothing worked.
"Here's the deal, niños. We're moving to CNP headquarters. Pinzón is such an ass, but I'm working on it. He hates our kind, but who doesn't in Colombia? He threw the tip line on my lap and I'm giving it to you."
"Telephone Operator? Really? Fuck me..." - Murphy complained.
Javier was... Distant. Weird in your eyes. You pretend not to care.
Something is off... - you thought.
Weeks passed since he last touched you, in that pool. A few casual happy hours, catching glimpses. Smirks. 
When you touched yourself, even without your vibrator, his image was right there: crystal clear in your mind.
You were almost giving up drinking your beloved whiskey and dear cigars... To be healthy? 
Fuck, no.
The whiskey's flavor and the cigar's scent remind you of his breath. You wanted to keep him far, but it was becoming unbearable.
"Be patient, you two. I'm not allowed to say much for now. At least pretend to do something. I'm working on our budget and relations with both governments."
After a few screw ups from the agents, as they captured Bush and became a joke, the days were appearing longer and harder. You were practically going insane to prove Crosby, the soon to be new ambassador, that your new, big and, overall, expensive plan was going to work.
You only needed a little luck...
Until it happened: the tip line handed to you three La Quica, one of Escobar's sicarios.
"Pinzón, I'll be a car and two men. Don't make me push further. We're just checking, we're not going to alarm'em." - you told him.
He sighed, made a joke about the fake calls... But said yes. 
As you all prepared to go, Murphy received a call from Connie and she told she was leaving Colombia.
"No, Con, please... Just listen!" - Steve was desperate.
"Murphy, go to the airport. You're not going with us. Go talk to your family, now!" - you spoked at him and he ran off.
"Let's go, boys. We all want La Quica." - I said.
*
Y/N's POV - 1st Person
"I swear, I don't know this one!" - Javier defended himself.
"I already told you, we don't care, Peña. But is this new? It's gotta be, as you don't know it..." - I joked, my heart was a little broken. 
The other cops laughed, as Peña rolled his eyes.
I didn't want to admit that his fame towards prostitutes and brothels made me jealous and a little resentful. 
He'd never know about how I felt nor my... Preference for a certain sextoy baptized after him.
"Stop by the payphone, back here." - I hid my gun and put on a cap, to match my jeans, sneakers and plain shirt. I could pass without no one noticing. - "Vamonos." (Let's go)
Me, Javier and one of the cops got out of the car, one by one.
But someone spotted us and told La Quica.
Out of the sudden, we're running around and, at the market, behaving as a predator hunting a prey. 
That place was so hot, so crowded... I couldn't see anything... Until he glanced before my eyes.
"Gotcha, pendejo." - I ran as fast as my legs could and a bit more. 
A fucking cross-fire started out of the blue and I had to hold a little.
Fuck! - I cursed alone.
I needed to think fast: we're just four and didn't know who to shoot.
Fuck it! I'm going after him! - I decided.
"Someone cover for me!" - I yelled and ran off again. I didn't have an answer before going.
*
Narrator's POV:
"Fuck! Where is she?" - Peña yelled.
When the shots stopped, they saw how the Colombians were frightened. They just wanted peace, not gringos and narcos shooting around.
"Where the fuck is my jefe?" - Javier asked again, screaming, to the other cops, seeing red, looking for you. The veins on his neck were bulging.
The backup arrived shortly with Pinzón.
"My men are looking for her, she went after one of the big fish. Some nerve the girl got, gotta say." - Pinzón mocked.
The other cops held Javier, asking for him to calm down.
Javier'd burn all the fuck down, until he finds you.
"Let me go. Not in the mood." - he said to the poor guy.
"Peña, look! It's her!" - He pointed out to you, a little bit hurt, your pink shirt torn and dirty.
Smiling like a kid on Christmas morning, you came out of nowhere, a little hurt, a few bruises starting to appear, your blouse dirty and torn up... But still looking pleased: a victorious agent.
Coming closer to Peña and Pinzón, you start:
"¡Mis amigos, mira que cosita más bonita tengo acá! I'd like to formally introduce you to this pendejo... Not La Quica this time, but we've got Luiz Rodriguez." (My friends, look what a beautiful thing I've got!)
"In my car I have a bag with 50 grand. If you give me one hour, I can make it ten times bigger." - he offered.
You burst out laughing at him.
"Oh, mi regalito..." (my little gift) - You had started, as one of Pinzón's men put on some handcuffs and you fondled his cheek. - "You're going to Disneyland. Don't worry, we're gonna take so much care of you, mi tesoro." (My treasure)
Javier knew you're mocking that sicario, but he still felt something awful on his chest, 'cause you're supposed to call him those sweet names, not that thug.
*
Arriving at the building, you and Javier went to the locker room, to change before going home. 
"Y/N, you scared the shit out of me. Luiz did all of these injuries? Or has anyone helped him? I swear, if there's someone else, I'll..." - he started, looking worried at you.
Y/N's POV - 1st Person
"No, Peña." - I interrupted him, as I searched for clothes in my locker. - "You're not doing anything. I can take care of myself."
Javier punched his locker hard as fuck.
"I thought I lost you! Don't ever do that again!" - he yelled.
I laughed, in a sarcastic tone, observing him. He seemed actually worried. 
"You know what, Peña? I don't care!" - I lifted my blouse, showing my huge scar on my ribs. - "Can you see it?" - his face shifted from pissed to desolated, as my eyes watered. He looked at another place. - "No! Don't turn! Take a nice long look at it! - My tone was so harsh. His eyes were so sad. - I always take care of myself! I've been alone in this world for as long as I remember, Peña. It's not my first fight on the field, it's not gonna be the last!"
His face was devastated... He felt sorry for me?
"Are you sorry for me, Peña? Oh, grow up! Why do you even care if I die or live? I know you hate me! And you know what? I fucking hate your guts as well!" - I screamed.
He remained silent. Why?
I started to change to a black shirt. I needed to leave.
I walked to the door, but when I noticed, he was behind me, holding it, not letting me leave.
"Y/N, cariño, I know you can take care of yourself, you've been doing that for a while now..." - he whispered in my ear. - "I heard you, by the way... Yes, I heard while you took care of yourself almost every night."
I swallowed hard, thinking:
Oh fuck, he heard me... Oh no...
"However, you called out my name, didn’t  you?" - he continued.
I leaned on the door pressing my back against it, turning to face him as Javier got on his knees and looked at my with those puppy brown eyes and said:
"Let me make your fantasy come true, cariño... Let me be your good boy, your obedient soldier."
His hands started to take off my boots and socks, one by one.
After that, he unbuttoned my jeans and slowly, so slowly, put it down to my feet, throwing it somewhere...
There I was, only in underwear and a shirt, my skin felt hot. 
His eyes never left mine.
I took off my shirt and bra and, lastly, his hands took off my red panties, at a slow pace, as if he was trying not to scare me off.
There I was, naked in front of Javier. 
He seemed to be thinking on what to do first, until he said:
"Tell me what you want, cariño. Let me be your good boy."
I just nodded positively.
"Words, please. Use your big beautiful mouth, cariño."
"Y-y-yes, Javi... Put your lips on me, show me how good you are..." - my voice barely came out.
He smiled, picked up one of my legs over his shoulder exposing me. His lips met my folds, oh so soft, so delicate... My hand grabbed his hair, pulling closer. 
He explored me, without any rush, as if he wanted to last as long as possible... Teasing my hole, opening me up with the tip of his tongue, fucking me. My clit throbbed, as my pussy clenched around his tongue.
I bit my lips, trying to stay quiet, my eyes closed. I couldn't look down, I was almost ashamed.
"Mmm..." - I sobbed, pulling his hair harder.
He slipped two fingers in me, and taking his mouth off me, said:
"Look at me, cariño, open your beautiful eyes while I make you feel good. Am I doing, at least, a nice job?" - he smirks, knowing he was. I opened my eyes, looking down, probably blushing. No one ever made me look as I was being eaten out. - "A little reassurance won't kill you."
"Y-y-yeah, Peña..." - I managed to say.
Oh, fuck.
His thumb met my clit, putting a gentle pressure as his middle and index fingers touched my g-spot.
"You can do better than that, cariño..." - he grinned, asking for more. - "You wet half of my face, Hermosa, you can call me Javi again."
"¡Hijo de puta!" - I cursed. - "Make me come on your lips, for God's sake... Be my good boy, Peña." - I asked.
He smiled and got back to suck my clitoris, making me shake under his touch. 
I came so hard, dripping all over Javier, calling out his name.
He took off one finger, slowing his pace. A very satisfied "hum" came out of him.
"You taste like heaven... You were such a good girl for me, cariño... But I'm greedy, you know? I want more from you and your sweet little pussy." - he smiled. - "I wanna see you beggin'... I'm not stopping now."
I was still burning from my first orgasm. 
Javier Jesus Peña was trying to kill me, for sure.
My hand traveled from his hair to his cheek, caressing him. 
"Javi... I'm only gonna say this once: do what you want with me. Do what you want to my body. I'm yours for tonight."
His finger left me, leaving me empty. 
Oh, fuck.
He stood up, looking deep in my eyes.
"My place or yours?" - he questioned. 
"Yours." - I responded, barely breathing.
He picked up my clothes, helped me get dressed and we went to his place.
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