#study me if you wish

[flittermousemoth]

Hello, "person who has dated with someone with bpd in the past and suddenly knows everything about every person with BPD", you should be further out of my existence than this.

#bpd memes #bpd #actually borderline #actually bpd #actually npd #npd #go away #i dont like you #study me if you wish #vent #bye

[fishyfishyfishtimes]

Forcing myself to study feels like forcibly having to feed icky medicine to an unwilling animal; the animal is constantly scrambling and kicking and trying to get away and you need to restrain it over and over again, somehow keep the grip around its strong limbs and slippery body and simultaneously force its jaws open with one hand

#i am studying organic chemistry right now fyi #im sorry chemistry you are very useful but i wish i was doing anything but this :( #though to be fair this is me with... any subject when theres an exam #not fish

[bloobydabloob]

Hello there

May I request Egbert's lil lizard guys in your artsyle

Thanks you :3

Hellooo Oliviaatk, yes you may. Various doodling Salamanders, Caseys and Johns for your viewing pleasure. My and my friends were talking last week about how cute Casey is… we all like her over here.

#homestuck #homestuck fanart #john egbert #casey homestuck #homestuck consorts #? #Is that a tag people use. Probably #hs fanart #Olivia atk I love your rosemary stuff. #I remember having an entire conversation with my friends on twitter about one of your drawings before haha #Ages ago though #(all good things. don’t fret) #Sorry for only doodling again today. I regret to inform you that I do indeed have to attempt to study today #Thank you to the anon that wished me luck on my test as well. #I’m so going to fail. What can a guy do I guess

[shaxza]

#dahlia hawthorne #ace attorney #phoenix wright #dahlia x phoenix #alexa play dark red by steve lacy #my art #since i dont want to make a dedicated post let me use my notes to vent about how much i love dahlia conceptually and how much i wish AA + #writers weren't sexist #dahlia was given the shittiest set of cards when she was a kid and she was a victim of grooming by that terry loser #she is CONSTANTLY objectified and sexualised and i think her design as a skinny young looking individual makes it even more distasteful #but i think it works if the writers could have done something with that #what i love about dahlia and phoenix's relationship is the contrast - phoenix needs to see people as innocent before jumping to help them v #dahlia who has if you think about it is innocent to a degree given how fucked up her childhood was #dahlia could have been a great case study into compassion for phoenix as she has hurt him directly but in his role as a lawyer he has to se #past certain flaws so justice can be served #and it can PUSH his understanding of what is “guilty” #yes dahlia killed people but also i choose to believe her worldview was severely warped by her enviornment and she's a product of it #or if they wanted to make her a villain and stick with it i think as a rival ro phoenix she should have been a cautionary tale #of what happens when you never learn to move beyond the shitty hand youve been dealt with and live non judgementally #anyways ^_^

[bookwyrminspiration]

there are so many words that I have only ever heard from my professor's mouth. if he hasn't told us and it's not in the two (2) pdf sources his institution has provided, i'm fucked

#language learning #langblr #i have quite literally met and been taught by one of the people who wrote the pdf dictionary we use #i have one pdf dictionary. one workbook. and a teacher who throws out random words sometimes #if i cannot find a word or grammar concept in that. then I simply. have to figure it out if at all possible. usually not #brought to you by me doing my homework and lamenting that I can't look up a word #never before have my notes in a class been so so important #there are some words where the random sidenote I made three weeks ago is the only record of it existing #(as in. it's not in the dictionary or workbook and I can't look it up) #anyway. i love studying the language but MAN sometimes I wish there was like. a slightly easier way to double check things on my own

[lotus-pear]

GUYS GUYS JUST HEAR ME OUT ON THIS ONE i propose skk hair color swap👹👹👹 just imagine how much more powerful chuuya would be w dark brown hair…… man would be the stereotypical mafia boss character he would look so good omfg and dazai alr gets bullied so what’s making him a ginger gonna change lmao. but like does this make sense?????????????? i can visualize this w perfect clarity and idk if that’s a good thing or not

#someone draw this pls pls pls pls pls pls I WILL PAY YOU #JUST DM ME UR PAYPAL #i’d do it myself but i unfortunately have my apush test to be studying for 💔 #hrrenghhhh anyway i’m insane i need to be put down #i’m gonna look back at this in a few hours and wish i could slam my past self’s head against a brick wall #bsd #skk #actually we’ve all seen ginger dazai bc of that one bones meursault art I WANT TO SEE CHUUYA W DARK HAIR THIS IS NOT A WANT IT IS A NEED

[lgbtlunaverse]

Life as a JGY stan is so hard because sometimes I want to make posts about the ways his very justified paranoia turns against him sometimes, rare moments where I think being more trusting or vulnerable would have helped but he felt like it couldnt, or talk about how his brutal survival instinct intersects with society's existing bigotries in a such a way that most of his violence is actually aimed at people lower on the ladder than him, with people like Jin Guangshan being the exception not the rule. Because he's a fascinating character and these parts of him are interesting!

But when I do that I have to live in perpetual fear of the moment that it escapes its target audience and someone takes it to go "Yeah he's a monster who fucked over everyone and is incapable of love! I wish he was killed earlier and his death was a thousand times more painful 🤪"

I mean, take my last example. Due to existing hierarchies it is, at any point, easier and safer for jgy to harm people less powerful than him instead of more powerful than him, even if the more powerful are the ones threatening his safety in the first place. Even knowing how it harms him and while working against it, Jin Guangyao is not immune to internalizing the mindset of the world he lives in. Even when killing Jin Guangshan- one man- it ends up costing the lives of 20 sex workers. You think I can bring up the sex workers in this fucking fandom? You think that will go over peacefully? The well has been so thoroughly poisoned here it feels like any conversation around morality automatically turns into a courtroom to determine a sentence for this fictional fucking character who's already dead.

#mdzs #meng yao #jin guangyao #complaining and whining about fandom #does fandom even know you can talk about morality in a way that's not adding up good person vs bad person tally points? #i think it's really fucking interesting how jgy is the person who's saved the most common people in the setting with the watchtowers #a politically unpopular move! this was a passion project he made becuase he wanted to help people! #and yet he's not afraid to take advantage of every bit of social capital he painstakingly gains to harm those below him either #i wish! that i could talk about that! #i also haaaate the 'incapable of love' thing on principle #morality is a choice! people don't need to FEEL love or empathy to not harm others #to use it as shorthand for 'evil' is reductive and fucking annoying #people hurt people they love all the time! #fandom does this in a similar way to nmj also. 'oh he can't empathise with other people' NOT THE PROBLEM. HE HAS A VERY DIFFERENT PROBLEM #what characters feel is very important to me from a 'studying blorbo' perspective but not in a debate about whether they're a good person

[tabithatwo]

do you think shauna learned that cells turn over completely in seven years thing in high school biology and latched onto it and had an existential crisis meltdown of nuclear proportions when it was coming up on seven years since she’d consumed jackie because none of the cells in her body were born out of the energy she got from jackie’s flesh anymore?

#or am I the only one who thinks like this l o l #I WISH this was shitposting #I’m so serious tho lmao like #I think shauna would think about this #I think she’d study it. like she’d say okay that’s just an untrue fun fact right #but then like once you get down to the detail and the complexity she wouldn’t know if she was MORE jackie or LESS jackie #she’s sitting in the LITERAL CLOSET that she loves to sit in for environmental storytelling purposes crying about cell turnover #jeff comes home and she’s holding a medical journal in shaking hands asking about heart cells #through sobs she asks if only 40% of your heart renews in a lifetime was any of that at the RIGHT time #jeff says what…what Right time you’re scaring me a little #shauna rolls her eyes and kicks him out of his own bedroom so she can cry under better conditions (without him) #she calls taissa for the first time in two years but she of course can’t bring herself to ask so it’s just an awkward call all around #this is both funny to me and breaking my heart like I’m so emotionally dysregulated about this I’m not sure if I’m kidding or serious!! #much like yellowjackets showtime!!! #yellowjackets #shauna shipman #jackie taylor #jackie x shauna #taissa turner #shauna x jackie

[silverskye13]

I had a dream last night that me and Docm77 were trapped in a warzone and he tackled me to the ground to save me from gunfire and then together we took out like ten guys.

I'm sure this says something about my psyche and that something is that if I ever met Docm77 in real life I think we would commit war crimes.

#spazzcat barks #docm77 #i.... dont know where the dream came from #maybe ive been?? reading too much Iliad lately??? i dont know???? #anyway thank you docm77 from saving me from being dream murdered by a bunch of guys with machine guns and rifles #we were definitely on the wrong side of the warfront we shouldnt have gotten seperated from the main body of reinforcements like that #he did jumpscare me though he was standing quiet and still as a statue #im guessing because he was hoping we wouldnt be spotted #and when we were he tackled me in a very Foxy from FNAF style jumpscare #also i blame his freaky redstone eye for us not successfully hiding that thing glows in the dark man youve gotta do something about that #anyway welcome back to: every time i sleep for more than 5 hours a night i have #violent dreams and nightmares that both god and man wish they could study under a microscope

[mayomkun]

Insane how many social cues humans have and you're supposed to know them all without being told

#and how they varies in different cultures #people and their funny complicated social structures are interesting to observe but not when you're in the situations #a group of people that fit together is a wonder to me because people are so so different #there are so many hidden rules they know but don't talk about and they just. know how the water flow and go along with it #and most of the time people seem to know how to do that so naturally #truly amazing when you think about it #meanwhile I think it's one of the most difficult thing to deal with #a single gesture or sentence could mean a lot of things and there are endless ways to response to it #I never meant to be offensive or unpleasant but then before I knew it I already did something wrong asfgjk #it's not their fault they misunderstood because I didn't get the hint. I just wish people tell me things directly sometimes #I study people like a bug but I'm also. a bug #delete later

[pinkcrittertomb]

I rebloged a post talking about how fucked up it is that a lot of people think of Nami as the mother of the strawhats and i mentioned how the same thing happens to Robin, so i wanna talk about how they are the SILLIEST OF ALL SILLY PEOPLE that exist. Silly queen and silly princess, these two are comanding the whole community of silly folks around the world. Robin has a serious and mysterious aura and personality sure, but underneath all that? A complete clown. Her humor is just different and darker than most people, but there is a reason why Luffy and Robin undertand each other so well. I wish Robin had a comedy show because i ADORE her jokes and dark humor (she is just like me fr) and would pass hours hearing her telling it. I hc that Brook loves that kind of humor, so they pass hours just sharing jokes. I don't even need to talk about Nami because have you looked at her? But i will anyway. She may look all tough and all to outsiders, but just looking at the way she interacts with the crew you can see it's just an act, definitely a form of protecting herself that she found while growing up fearing Arlong. With her family she can be carefree, no fear of judgment or feeling impotent, she can let free all the happiness she held back all those years.

#i wish i could write more but i'm running against time rn lol #these women are just so special to me #tbh i never studied nami's character much deep #but there is only one thing you need to see just how amazing and awesome nami and her character is: don't be an asshole #one piece #op #cat burglar nami #nami #robin #nico robin

[skeletoninthemelonland]

😭😭

#BEHIND THE CODES SPRINGTRAP NOOO #Hi. im posting this here during a break from studying. i'll be back soon though #:] #i plan on making some springdad au animations in the future to better my skills #working on the au helped me get through some stuff irl and honestly im not ready to let go of it so soon #i'd say its different from the aftons suburb one. i had lost interest in it when it became some sort of shitpost #there is nothing wrong in having 'shitpost aus' but ig its not how i wish to view things #i do like ephemeral stuff #things that last for a while and that make you think 'woah. im glad i had the opportunity to see this' are always my favorite #aftons suburb was one of these cases #springdad au is going through the same path. but i trully believe theres more content to come from it #oh and about BTC? #i took a break from it. its been two or three months since that folder was last opened (and if i did open it. i didnt do anything) #its relatively hard to come up with good dialogs when theres also a need to comprehend how different characters express themselves #especially when said characters are older than you. or smarter than you in some way #some of them speak louder. while others will speak through their actions #thought i had to grow up a bit more to understand how these things work. #turns out. that mindset was blocking the whole creative process #anyway. its going to take a while #thank you for your patience

[the---hermit]

end of the year study masterlist

I have made this kind of post a few times in the past. I have lots to keep in mind and although I do have very specific to-do lists in my bullet journal I like to have a big list on here too to make me feel accountable. This helps me having a clear overview of everything I have to do and the progress I am making. I will be crossing things off as I complete tasks, and I will probably add more tasks every once in a while. This is meant to be a sort of preparation for winter exams to do list, I haven't given myself deadlines yet, but the more I get done soon the better. I also want to keep in mind that I am still doing the self care journey 3.0 with my friend @oneardentstudybuddy, so productivity is the goal here but I still need to keep an eye out to avoid burning myself out, and take time in my days to actively take care of myself.

English lit: this whole list has now been deleated because I decided to move my exam from January to April, so I will be working on all this stuff after my winter exam session.

History of enlightment philosophy:

finish attending lectures (and stay on track with fixing my notes everyday)

additional post-holiday lectures 1, 2, 3, 4

finish reading book #2

read book #3 (since it's digital see if I need to write down some notes while reading it)

reread important passages in books (1,2,3)

notes of the main points of each book (1,2,3)

highlight presentation notes

big reread of all notes

list of key words

review out loud (1,2)

practice answering exam questions out loud

Power practices and men theories in the modern era:

reread and highlight lecture notes

fix notes by adding the infos I originally annotated on the texts

read and annotate book (intro, ch1, ch2, ch3, ch4, ch5, ch6, ch7, ch8, ch9)

write down list of key words

review out loud (1, 2, 3)

make sure to check all the images and pictures that were discussed in the lectures because they could come up during the exam

guest lecture stuff:

brain dump

get back all my thesis diaries and other tumblr posts where I talk about my experiece in detail to see if there's useful elements to talk about

guide lines to have a coherent speech

rehearse or smt idk

#this post will be heavily edited in the next while but it's kinda scary already and i feel like i forgot about smt #but you know what? finally having a good overview of everything makes me feel much calmer and more motivated #the main reason i want a digital list of my to dos here is the satisfaction of crossing everything out but also #since this blog is a sort of journey for me it's nice to be able to look back at what i did etc #wish me luck #winter exams study masterlist #study masterlist #to do list #uni masterlist #studyblr #studyinspo #uniblr #univeristy #student life #studying #mine #the---hermit

[dostoyevsky-official]

You know Mandarin??

sometime in the spring of this year i kept encountering the idea on other social media that chinese is impossible to learn for europeans, that it's too difficult, that no westerner can learn or truly understand it, and in combination with a mainland friend visiting and telling me the ancient chinese etymology of some basic characters (and the 白人饭 Lunch of Suffering meme) i got fed up/enchanted and did the extremely mentally healthy thing of teaching myself basic mandarin, through about ~april to july. at some points in may i remember coming home from work, scribbling characters in my mandarin notebook over and over, doing chores, going to sleep, and repeating the cycle. a taiwanese friend on here helped out with a lot (it's much, much easier if you have chinese friends to help you, however, i am really not about traditional, although i admit it's more beautiful) and baptized me with a chinese name.

i don't know mandarin, and at this point a lot of the characters i'd learned have faded from memory, but i insist that it's not actually difficult to learn chinese (up to a point— maybe HSK 3 or 4 is where it gets really difficult). in fact, learning chinese is really, really fun.

the difficulty lies in the fact that you have to do it every single day for at least an hour, probably for more (i spent pretty much all my free time on it, but there was something not normal going on with me then). you'd think, isn't that the case for every language? yet i don't remember doing daily french like that, and i consider some aspects of french conjugation/russian grammar much more difficult than what chinese throws at you at similar difficulty levels (good luck with motion verbs, non-slavic speakers). i found learning characters to be very, very easy. they're all distinct. if you learn them together with their etymology, looking at ancient chinese and how they developed along with associated idioms, it's endlessly rewarding. at least in the early levels, there's a bit of a system to how characters and words come together and increase in complexity—sometimes it's funny, sometimes it's cute. it's a breath of fresh air to start reading even basic sentences and idioms in a language so entirely different from anything you've experienced before. many people say speaking chinese is easier than reading/writing: in my experience, that's false. i barely started getting a grasp on the tonal system (my goal was to get to HSK 1 solely through written chinese); i remember listening to the same 2 minute audio clip of two people exchanging phone numbers for half an hour or something once before getting everything right. people say "chinese doesn't have grammar" but that's not true, because otherwise it won't be a language at all, though you don't have to learn any conjugations, declensions, etc. at HSK 1-2 you just throw a modifier/particle into a sentence and you're good to go.

the other main difficulty besides tones is that imo chinese culture is borderline impenetrable if you want to have a genuine stab at it (but for this you don't, necessarily, need to learn mandarin). you can learn HSK 1-2 in a few months or a semester, but it will take you years to genuinely understand the cultural context—there truly is no context clue or familiar idea you can latch on to, as opposed to when learning a european language/history, or even turkish, arabic, persian; there is nothing in common here, and if you guess, you'll probably wind up wrong. it all makes me think of how many journalists/experts get russia wrong: i now firmly do not believe a word of what people write about asia unless i find the author knows the language

anyway

#keep in mind of course i did not go past HSK1 #i prefer simplified but seeing what they did to 門 makes one a rabid antimaoist #you get to understand the pò èr shǒu chē reel of the little chinese girl pointing at a porsche that goes around on instagram. #i truly wish china was somehow connected to what i study bc i cannot justify spending that much time on mandarin #unfortunately the harbin russians didn't bother with chinese #smth else about this blog is that india is likewise impenetrable to me. the sheer historical and geographic scale is unbearably intimidatin #where does one even start? #ed* ^ i know the basic 101 historical outlines but i don't think that's “knowing” a place

[infiniteorangethethird]

everyone: you should use your 20s to get to know as many people as you can! spend your college years making friends and connections! you cannot live a successful life without a widespread people network!!

me, autistic + loveless apl: I should do what now

#autistic: don't know how to befriend (new) ppl #loveless apl: not interested in befriending (new) ppl #this advice seems sound conceptually but like #do you have any idea how HARD it is to make connections like this #it's like trying to study for a subject u don't understand nor care for #it's a hassle w too high energy demand & too low payoff #dont get me wrong it would be nice to have a support network #just wish it could be done w/o the agonizing social dance of friendship #autism #autistic #actually autistic #neurodivergent #actually neurodivergent #aplatonic #loveless apl

[in-omni-scientia]

Wanted to compile the art I did for the Encyclopedia's No Good Bad Week (In Which He is Accused of Being a Boykisser by Everyone, Finds Out He Has a Secret Admirer, Works Out It's Another Skill, Is Psychologically Tortured by Drama And Many Others About It, Goes Completely Non-Verbal for the First Time in his Existence After Realising He Doesn't Know, Blocks Everyone, and then Finally Confronts The Instigator (Empathy) and uses the World's Greatest Pickup Line On Them (But Not Before Nearly Causing Harry To Have A Stroke and Die), All Over The Course of Just Four Days) Skillsposting Arc in the main DE tag, but wasn't sure how to do it without exposing myself -- well, I just remembered I can just post it on this blog. lol

Also featuring a secret image I only shared in the Skillsposting server. Remember - facts do care about your feelings. Wahoo !

#disco elysium #ooc #secret art compilation #contains: id #skillsposting #Genuinely the most fun I've had in a while #Thank you guys for being so entertaining #I needed the strength during my studying for exams LOL #wish me luck my exam block is next week 🙏🙏