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melanielocke · 3 years

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Conceal don't Feel - Two

Love is an Open Door

Taglist: @alastaircarstairsdefenselawyer @foxglove-airmid @alastair-esfandiyar-carstairs1 @justanormaldemon @styxdrawings @ipromiseiwillwrite @a-dream-dirty-and-bruised @alastair-appreciation-month @writeordie-4 @amchara

AO3

Previous chapter: One: Do You Wanna Build a Snowman

Next chapter: For the First Time in Forever (to be posted)

Cordelia had never been so disappointed in her entire life. She’d been promised a guest, someone closer to her and Alastair’s age, someone who could end her days of loneliness and be her friend. Father had told her about it himself on one of his better days, he’d invited someone of her generation to come help Alastair. She knew the guest would be there mainly for her brother, of course, but Alastair hated being around people and she was sure whoever the guest was would have plenty of time to spend with her instead. She’d longed for someone to end her loneliness for such a long time she had started fantasizing about the person who would be staying until she’d gotten some admittedly unrealistic expectations. Instead, Charles Fairchild had arrived.

He wasn’t as close to her age as had been promised. Instead, he was eight years older than her, which she guessed was technically her generation, but he found himself far too mature to spend time with silly little girls like her. Not to mention, of course, that he was here for Alastair, and Alastair alone. With Father sick so often and Mother filling in, Alastair needed someone to teach him how to be a king. Somehow, her brother tolerated Charles’ presence whereas he still told Cordelia to go away and leave him alone whenever she approached him. After a few weeks she learned Charles had a younger brother around Cordelia’s age, but of course he hadn’t been invited.

With a groan, she returned to her practice with cortana. It was all she had these days, all she cared about. Even if she was all alone and her brother had barely spoken to her in years, she had been gifted the family sword, both a great honor and responsibility. She wondered sometimes why Alastair had chosen to gift her cortana, as it was tradition the sword went to the heir to the throne.

‘I knew it was important to you,’ was all he’d said when she’d asked, but for Cordelia that wasn’t a satisfactory answer. Giving her a powerful sword that was rightfully his because he knew it was important to her implied he loved her, yet nothing else Alastair did or said showed he even cared about her a little bit. If he loved her, he would spend time with her, not hide in his room and yell at her to go away.

Nowadays, he would only ever spend times with Charles, because of course while Cordelia wasn’t good enough for him, Charles was everything. They deserved each other, Cordelia had decided. They were both boring and stupid and could only ever talk about politics. The only time Charles paid Cordelia any mind was when he told her a princess shouldn’t be eating so much chocolate and maybe she should try losing some weight. He had a point, princesses were supposed to be slim and small and Cordelia wasn’t, but he didn’t have to be so rude about it. She didn’t understand why Alastair followed Charles around like some lost puppy. He used to shut the world out, and it seemed like he’d opened the door, but right after Charles had entered it had shut down with full force once more.

She wished she could let it go, and forget about her brother, but she couldn’t. She still remembered the fun they used to have when they were little, how he’d looked out for her and helped her build the most amazing snowmen. It had all happened so sudden, one day they were playing in the snow together, the next he wouldn’t leave his room and refused to even speak to her. Perhaps there was an explanation, something that would make it all make sense. But then why was Charles the exception, and what did Alastair see in him?

***

When Charles arrived in Arendelle, Alastair redoubled his resolve to get this power under control, to never let it show. Letting Thomas see had been a mistake. He’d trusted Thomas, had cared for him, and now they would never see each other again and how could he be sure Thomas hadn’t shared his secret? He had no reason to assume Charles would even accept the way he was. He could never know.

‘The palace of Arendelle is beautiful,’ Charles said. ‘A different style from the palace of the southern isles. Not that that is still in use, it has been turned into a museum. A real shame.’

Charles made no effort to hide the disdain in his voice as he said the word museum.

‘Why?’ Alastair asked.

‘Because there’s no monarchy anymore,’ Charles said. ‘My mother was the Queen of the Southern Isles until two years ago. She ended the monarchy and was elected as president instead. She thought it unfitting for an elected leader to live in a grand palace, so she decided it should be a museum instead to preserve our country’s history.’

Alastair stared at Charles with wide eyes. ‘That’s a possibility? I could just end the monarchy and have elections for a leader? And whoever has good ideas on how to improve the country could just sign up?’

He imagined all sorts of people would be willing to give it a try, and Alastair had never wanted the throne anyway. He had no idea how he’d be king and meet with cabinet members and foreign officials and never show the ice that rested inside of him.

Charles chuckled, as if he’d just said something ridiculous.

‘Perhaps not,’ he said quietly, already feeling stupid.

‘Being a Crown Prince is an honor, Alastair, a great privilege. Who in their right mind would give that up? Why would you not want to be king?’

Alastair sighed. ‘I guess you’re right. It’s just a lot of responsibility, and I’m not sure I’m ready for that.’

‘That’s alright. That’s why I’m here. I might not be a prince anymore, but I have a lot of experience being one and later I helped with my mother’s presidential campaign and presidency. I know how to run a country.’

His friendship with Charles might have been a bit rocky at first, but Alastair soon learnt to trust him more. It was a bit like with Thomas, when Charles was near Alastair felt calmer and could control the ice.

Charles was knowledgeable and took his time to educate Alastair on everything he thought was important for a future king. He was often willing to make time for Alastair, even when it was not convenient for him, and Alastair thought as long as Charles was here, everything was going to be alright.

‘What will you do, when you return to the southern isles?’ Alastair asked him one day.

‘Run for president myself,’ Charles said. ‘It’s not the same as being king, but there’s still much good I can do for the southern isles. My mother has done a good job, but I fear she is too sentimental. I can make my country strong again, that is all I ever wanted.

Don’t worry, I won’t be leaving anytime soon. You still need plenty of my help, and I think together we can set up some better trade routes, build an alliance and find new ways in which we can help each other. I think both Arendelle and the Southern Isles could benefit from a closer relationship.’

Alastair was intrigued. Alliances with foreign kingdoms were what he feared the most of being king. He wasn’t charming, too blunt and straight forward to flatter, but perhaps with Charles he could get started on a good alliance without those skills. ‘Of course. Whatever you need.’

***

Cordelia was beyond excited. Alastair had asked her to join him for a picnic on the palace grounds this afternoon. This would be her chance to get her brother back and a picnic was a decent start. Perhaps someday coming winter they could build a snowman again. Cordelia firmly believed you were never too old to build a snowman.

She picked out her nicest dress, eternally grateful it still fit as she was always growing out of her clothes, and went out to meet Alastair in the gardens. For once he wasn’t with Charles, which was nice because Cordelia did not want to talk about politics all afternoon. She had more important things to discuss.

‘I’m glad you came,’ Alastair said.

He was tense, Cordelia could tell. It was hard to read his moods with Alastair, he rarely showed any emotion, but she had learnt to recognize the slight tension in his shoulders, his stiff demeanor, as if he was forcing himself to speak. She wondered why he would be tense.

‘Of course I came,’ Cordelia said. ‘As far as I know you’re still my only brother.’

‘I’m sorry, for the past years,’ Alastair said. ‘I know you must have been very alone.’

Cordelia nodded. ‘Yes. I know you have to study and prepare for being king and all, but why can’t we at least open the gates every once in a while? Maybe invite some girls my age, or even Charles’ younger brother?’

She knew spending a lot of time with a boy her age would be considered inappropriate, but that was still preferable to keeping the company of the portraits on the wall. She had so little experience with social interaction she didn’t even know how to speak to someone her age, and Father expected her to get married when she was older. How was she supposed to do that when she never met anyone? There was no way she was marrying Charles.

‘I’m sorry,’ Alastair said quietly. ‘We can’t do that.’

‘Father could invite Charles,’ Cordelia protested. ‘Surely we can invite someone else. I still don’t have a lady in waiting.’

‘That’ll have to wait, Layla. I’m sorry. I wish it were different.’

Alastair had called her Layla since she was a little girl, after a girl in a story their mother used to tell them, and it was a bit of a weak spot of hers. Still, she was determined not to let it go, because nothing Alastair said made any sense.

‘But why?’ Cordelia asked. ‘What are you so afraid of?’

‘I’m not afraid of anything,’ Alastair bit at her.

There was that temper she remembered from his childhood. It was good to see he still felt anything at all, but Cordelia did not want to make him angry the first time she’d spoken to him in years. Perhaps she should be a little more tactful about this instead of forcing answers out of him. One thing she knew for sure though, there was something Alastair knew and she didn’t. Perhaps more than one thing, Alastair always seemed to know much more than he let on. It was infuriating.

‘I’m sorry,’ she said and she hoped he would believe her apology was sincere. ‘I just wish I could have friends too.’

‘Maybe when you’re older,’ Alastair said. ‘I’ll do what I can, alright? But no promises.’

Cordelia decided to accept that for now. ‘Your life must have been very boring too. I mean, you have company, but it’s Charles. That might actually be worse than being alone.’

Alastair rolled his eyes. ‘He’s not boring. He’s a politician, and a very good one. He knows everything there is about being king, even if he won’t be one himself anymore. It is very generous of him to come here and help me.’

Cordelia made a face. ‘I don’t like him. Most of the time he ignores me, which honestly is fine, but he also tells me I eat way too much chocolate and need to lose weight.’

Her weight had become a bit of an insecurity lately. She was at the end of her growth spurt and quite tall, which she liked, she was even taller than Alastair, but while she’d stopped growing in length, she kept getting wider and had to throw out dresses all the time. Her mother had told her this was normal for girls her age, but Cordelia was pretty sure most girls her age were much thinner than she was, and princesses were expected to be small and skinny.

If Charles was to be believed, it was because of all the sweets she ate, and reminding her of it was hurtful, not to mention he was always rude and condescending about it, as if she couldn’t possibly know what was good for her.

‘I’m sorry, I’ll ask him not to bother you,’ Alastair promised. ‘But I really need him here, alright? I will be king one day, and I desperately need his help.’

Cordelia snorted. ‘Maybe if you wanted to learn how to be a better king, you could actually go outside and spend time with the people of Arendelle instead of hiding here in the castle.’

‘That’s not possible,’ Alastair said stiffly.

He was worried. Cordelia couldn’t tell what it was, but she was determined to find out.

‘Are you scared to leave the palace?’ Cordelia asked. ‘I read a book some time back about someone who was scared to leave their house. It was very intriguing.’

‘I’m not scared, Cordelia,’ Alastair hissed, but something about his stiff mannerism revealed otherwise.

She nodded. ‘Alright, so you have a fear of going outside like that character in the book. Maybe there’s a doctor somewhere who can help you overcome your fear since I have no idea how it’s done and I imagine dragging you outside might make it worse. But that’s alright, I could go out and into the city for you and report back what I learn. We could be a great team, like we used to be.’

‘No, Cordelia, that’s not… I’m not afraid.’ He stopped abruptly, twisting his fingers together.

Alastair was wearing a pair of fancy black gloves. Now that she noticed, he always wore gloves. Perhaps if he was scared of going outside, he was also scared of dirt? The palace was cleaned, of course, but some rooms weren’t cleaned as often because of the limited staff and would collect dust. She did remember her brother had always been rather neat, that had to be it.

‘We’re done here,’ Alastair said. ‘Goodbye.’

He stood up and walked away. They hadn’t even eaten anything yet. Cordelia ran after him.

‘Where are you going?’

‘Back inside. I changed my mind, I don’t want to have a picnic with you.’

Cordelia didn’t understand. He’d invited her, he’d wanted to spend time with her. Had she done something wrong to change his mind? It didn’t make any sense, she might have been a little pushy, but he had to understand it was for his own good, right?

‘Why? Am I suddenly not good enough for you anymore?’ Cordelia yelled, grabbing his shoulder.

‘Leave me alone, Cordelia,’ Alastair hissed. ‘I mean it.’

Cordelia was taken back by the sudden vehemence in his voice.

‘Fine, go back inside to stupid Charles and his stupid lessons!’ she yelled after him as he walked inside.

He didn’t look back, not even once. As if she was nothing. Great, that was her one chance to win back her brother, to improve her situation here somewhat. Now she had no idea what to do.

She returned to the picnic site and collapsed onto the blanket she’d laid out for the two of them. She stuffed some chocolate into her mouth. Chocolate she’d specifically requested for Alastair, because she knew he liked anything sweet, and loved chocolate most of all. Cordelia did too, curse stupid Charles and his stupid comments about her eating habits. She was the princess, she could eat as much chocolate as she wanted. She needed some way to cope with being alone all the time and if Charles thought it was bad for her maybe he should go find her a friend. As it was, she returned to days of loneliness and practicing with cortana. What else was she supposed to do?

***

‘Your father didn’t show up to our meeting again,’ Charles said. ‘We were supposed to discuss your progress weekly, but most of the time he isn’t there. Do you know if he’s alright?’

‘He’s just sick,’ Alastair said, terrified Charles would find out about his father’s drinking. ‘No one knows what’s wrong with him, but it’s been getting worse. Mother has taken over most of his tasks so he can rest. Thanks to you, I can start helping out too. I’ve been working on my correspondence, and I was wondering if you could double check my letter to the Duke of Weselton?’

Charles nodded. ‘I’ll look at your letter. I am sorry to hear about your father’s illness, Alastair, I know it’s been hard on you. How’s your sister under all this?’

Alastair sighed. A couple of months ago, he’d thought he was making progress. Around Charles he felt so much better, he felt as if the ice wasn’t even there unless he called for it. He had thought maybe he could give his sister another chance and he’d invited her to a picnic. If everything had gone well and he’d felt in control around her, he could have told her the truth there, and show her what he was capable of. But when he’d met with Cordelia, everything came back in full force and he’d have to fight with every bit of his willpower to repress his fear and keep the ice inside of him. Cordelia was still mad about his sudden departure, but he’d had no other choice if he wanted to keep her safe. When he’d gotten back to his bedroom, he’d lost control and caused a snowstorm. While he thought his control had improved since Charles had come, the size of any outburst that slipped through had grown.

He was lucky Cordelia hadn’t seen it and at least now that Father was drunk all the time, he wouldn’t notice and put Alastair in chains. He knew it was all his fault though, his father wouldn’t have started drinking if it weren’t for him.

‘I think it’s difficult for her,’ Alastair said. ‘She mentioned you made some comments about her eating habits the other day. I know you mean well, but she doesn’t like it.’

‘I’m just concerned for her. It’s unhealthy to eat so much chocolate,’ Charles insisted. ‘She’ll thank me when she doesn’t have to throw out another of her custom made gowns.’

Alastair didn’t think it was fair to shame her for growing out of clothes when he did the same. He’d started his growth spurt lately and most of his suits had become too short. They weren’t thrown away either, they were sold second hand, as were Cordelia’s old gowns.

‘I think she’s insecure about how she looks,’ Alastair said. ‘And she has plenty to worry about, I don’t think she should be worrying about her weight on top of that. Your comments aren’t helping her.’

He didn’t understand why his control was so much worse around Cordelia. A long time ago, he’d hurt her, and he was terrified it would happen again. Perhaps that was different with Charles. With Charles he could not feel, like he was supposed to.

The problem, of course, was that with Charles he did feel. Just like he had with Thomas. It had not appeared as fast as it had with Thomas, but it was so much stronger now that he’d gotten to know Charles, had spent nearly a year with him.

He wanted Charles. Loved him, even. Alastair didn’t understand why he felt this way. Years ago, he’d met his cousin Jem who’d told him how he loved both Will and Tessa romantically. Alastair couldn’t imagine loving more than one person at the same time, nor could he imagine loving a woman, but perhaps some men longed for the love of other men instead of women.

Perhaps being in love was what calmed his moods, as long as he wasn’t scared. Right now, he wasn’t, not yet. He knew it was unlikely Charles felt the same way. That was alright, because he still wanted to be near him and then everything would be fine.

‘You know, I always found it unusual how empty this castle is,’ Charles said one day. ‘No one else ever stays, your parents always travel to meet foreign leaders and never invite anyone over. There aren’t half as many cleaners and servants as there were in my old palace.’

‘We minimized the staff,’ Alastair said. ‘It seems wasteful to spend money on staff when that could be spent on improving the kingdom.’

‘You don’t even have friends,’ Charles said. ‘No other noblemen visit, ever. You don’t have any companions, nor a page. You sleep alone. It’s odd.’

Alastair frowned. ‘How is it odd that I sleep alone?’

‘When I was still a prince, I had a page. A boy around my age, who shared my bed at night. It was normal at home, for noblemen and women to have a page or lady in waiting share their bed. A good way to make sure your virtue remains intact and you do not share your bed with a woman you are not married to.’

Alastair wasn’t sure that would be effective. Who was to say nothing improper happened between the nobleman and the person who shared their bed?

‘There’s no one here I could lose my virtue to,’ Alastair said. ‘But I know what you mean, my mother does share her bed with Risa, her lady in waiting. My father doesn’t though, he sleeps alone.’

No one could find out he was a drunk. No one would believe in him as a king anymore, and therefore it was up to Alastair to keep anyone from finding out, just like he had to keep everyone from finding out about the ice inside of him.

‘I imagine you don’t have a page anymore at home?’ Alastair asked.

‘We had a fall out shortly before my mother gave up the crown,’ Charles said in a tone that indicated he did not want to talk about it.

Charles did not bring the topic up again for some time, not until he was complaining about his younger brother one day.

‘He’s been campaigning for the right for men to love other men,’ Charles said with a sigh. ‘And for women to love women. Here I was thinking he’d never give up on being silly and going out partying, but this is worse.’

Alastair tilted his head. ‘Why? Is he not fighting for a good cause?’

‘He will make everything much harder for me, for our family,’ Charles said. ‘People are shunning him, of course. They’re wondering, why is he campaigning for this, what does it mean about him? And my brother does not have the good sense to hide he likes both men and women.’

So Charles’ brother was like his cousin Jem, then? Alastair had not met Matthew Fairchild, but it was difficult to hear Charles talk like this. He felt a familiar tingling in his fingers, a warning he might lose control. Something he had not yet felt around Charles.

‘That is very brave of him,’ Alastair said.

‘I prefer to think of it as foolish,’ Charles said. ‘The people won’t accept him, he won’t change a thing. He’ll just make everything harder for himself, and for me. People will watch us more closely. No one batted an eye when Daniel, my former page, shared my bed for years.’

Alastair gasped. ‘You mean to say you love men?’

‘Unfortunately I do. It’s not easy for someone like me. I have to keep it a secret, or I risk losing everything. No one would vote for a man like me to be president. But with the proper precautions, I’ve been quite successful at hiding my affections and desires while still indulging in them. I wish my brother understood that.’

Alastair put his hand on Charles’ and felt the tingling fade. It wasn’t gone, not entirely, but he wouldn’t lose control. ‘Does your brother know about you?’

‘No. I never wanted him to. You’re the first person I’ve told after Daniel, I know I can trust you to keep my secret.’

Alastair felt special to be entrusted with such a secret, and could it mean Charles returned his feelings? Had Charles told him because he hoped Alastair might want to be with him?

‘When I’m king, I will do what your brother has been campaigning for, I will change the laws and allow two men or two women to be together,’ Alastair promised. ‘Get married, even.’

Charles waved his hand dismissively. ‘Don’t be silly, Alastair.’

His heart sank, the tingling increased. He had to tell Charles about his affections, or else everything would become snow and ice.

‘But I’m like you,’ Alastair said. ‘I like men. And I don’t want to hide forever. What’s even the point in being king if I can’t change such things?’

‘They’ll cast you out, Alastair,’ Charles said. ‘Don’t waste your birthright on something the people will never accept. Best to keep your affections a secret. You’re a prince, you can pick any boy you like to be your page or companion and share your bed. No one would suspect a thing.’

Charles put his hand on Alastair’s shoulder, a bit too long for it to be called friendly, right?

‘What about you?’ Alastair asked. ‘I feel choosing a page to be my love would be unfair. Like, would he even get a say in that? It wouldn’t be like that with you.’

Charles smiled and cupped his cheek with his hand. It was smooth, the hand of someone who had not done manual labor. ‘You’re in love with me, aren’t you?’ he said, his voice gentle.

Alastair rubbed his hands together, forcing the tingling to stop. He felt frost underneath his gloves, but it was still hidden. Conceal, don’t feel.

‘Yes,’ he whispered.

‘I suspected as much,’ Charles said. ‘I like you too, Alastair. You’re smart and beautiful, and you will be a great king someday. But this has to be a secret. You understand that, don’t you? I will be with you, but only as long as you can keep your affections concealed.’

Alastair nodded. ‘Of course.’

Then Charles kissed him, and it was like fire, a sudden heat that melted his frozen heart, that stopped the tingling in his fingers, that calmed the storm inside of him. Perhaps love was the answer after all.

Alastair and Charles explored much more than just kissing together. Charles came to share his bed, claiming it was improper how Alastair slept alone all night. No one suspected a thing, but then of course, there was no one who could suspect. It was the first time in years where Alastair felt he might be happy. Even if he was still too dangerous to be around his sister. He tried once more. No promises this time, he just sought her out in her room to see if they could talk. The storm returned almost immediately and Alastair realized his sister would never be safe if he went near her. The only one he could be around was Charles.

It was amazing at first. Long nights together, Charles touching him, making love to him. He’d never known being touched by someone could feel so good, nor that it would melt the ice inside his heart. Charles knew exactly what he was doing and what he wanted, and Alastair was happy to oblige.

It was wonderful outside of the bedroom too. He loved how Charles would gently touch his shoulder, his wrist as he guided him through their lessons. But it didn’t take long for the secrecy of it all to start to weigh on him. Charles’ younger brother had fled farther south for his own safety, confirming Charles’ beliefs it was better to keep their love a secret. Alastair was scared the same might happen to him, but what could possibly be worse than people finding out he was a monster with ice in his heart?

Perhaps it would be better to leave, to flee into the woods and snow touched mountains and make his home there. The cold didn’t bother him, he would survive. But Charles could not come with him there, and so he stayed. Even while Charles mocked his ideas, told him he was still too young to understand what it was to rule a kingdom and treated him like was a child despite being old enough to be Charles’ lover.

Once he’d been in control around Charles, but not anymore. He wasn’t sure why it had gotten worse, why he was so scared Charles would leave him, that he wasn’t good enough anymore. He redoubled his resolve, made sure to read everything Charles asked him to, be everything his lover needed him to be. Charles was all he had, he didn’t think he could survive being abandoned. They stayed like this for several years. Alastair never took his gloves, not even when they had sex, and never explained why. Charles thought it was odd, but had come to accept it.

Even when he lost control, the gloves kept it in for a little longer, offered a bit of protection, and the time to get away before the storm began. Whenever he didn’t trust himself anymore, he went to his own private bathroom, a place even Charles wasn’t allowed to enter. Now that Charles shared his bed, his bedroom wasn’t a safe place to lose control anymore and he couldn’t exactly ask Charles to leave. So instead, this bathroom had frozen several times over, and whenever he was going to lose control he just told Charles he needed to use the bathroom. At this point, all the pipes had broken, so nothing could be used, but everything had been cut off from the water network long ago and his outbursts didn’t affect the other bathrooms. Charles had not uncovered his secret, and although it was difficult to keep it from him, it was for the best.

***

Cordelia took her father’s hand. ‘Where are you going? Are you sure you’re well enough to travel?’

‘I’m feeling much better, Cordelia dear,’ he said with a smile. ‘Don’t worry about me. I’ll be back before you know it.’

Cordelia wasn’t sure where exactly her parents would be traveling. It wasn’t the first time he left, of course, to meet with foreign nobles, but this time he would be going on a much longer journey, and it had been a while since he’d traveled anywhere. He’d been too sick and Mother had written letters to keep up relations instead.

‘Can’t I come with you?’ Cordelia asked.

‘Not this time,’ her father said. ‘But I promise on my next journey you can come with me. It’s almost time for you to be presented to the world. But this is something I have to do myself, I’m afraid.’

The idea of being presented to the world sounded good, but perhaps that would be a bit much all at once. Perhaps it would be nicer to start with a smaller group of people who could be her friends.

‘What if the people won’t like me?’ Cordelia asked.

‘Of course they will. You are beautiful, compassionate and nurturing, what’s not to like?’

Cordelia could always count on her father to tell her she was beautiful, even if not long ago she’d had to throw out nearly all of her gowns because she’d gained too much weight to fit into them.

‘I’ll still be here, azizam,’ her mother said, which surprised her.

‘Oh, I thought you were going too,’ Cordelia said.

‘I was, but Alastair insisted he was not ready to take over while I was gone and needed me to stay,’ her mother explained. ‘I know that’s not true and Alastair is more than ready, but I thought staying would put his mind at ease.’

Cordelia supposed that should make her less lonely, but her mother spent all her time on filling in for her father and she wasn’t sure where that left her. She knew everyone was keeping something from her, but she couldn’t figure out what and it was frustrating. She’d tried asking her father, who had told her not to worry, that everything would be alright in the end. Then she’d asked her mother, who’d told her that her brother was going through a difficult time, without offering any explanation. Apparently, boys his age often went through times like this, except in Alastair’s case that had been years now. Not that Cordelia knew any other boys Alastair’s age to compare his behavior to, but that was hardly her fault.

It turned out her father wasn’t back before she knew it. It took months to even get word from him. Of course, it was a long journey by ship and it made sense they did not hear anything at first, but after a couple of months Cordelia began to worry. They should have heard something by now, what could have become of him?

‘He’ll be alright, Cordelia,’ her mother had said. ‘We’ll hear from him soon enough. He must have decided to stay longer than intended and it would take time for a letter to reach us.’

But Cordelia could tell her mother was worried too, more so with every passing day during which they did not hear from Elias. Several months after he’d first left, a messenger came.

‘I am terribly sorry to bring you this news, Your Majesty,’ the messenger said, addressing her mother. ‘The King’s ship went down in the southern seas. There were no survivors.’

Cordelia had been in shock at first. Then she’d burst into tears. Mother had cried too, although a bit more concealed. Alastair though, had not shown a thing. He’d taken the news quietly, asked a few questions, and then retreated to his room. As if he didn’t feel a thing, as if he didn’t care.

The funeral was a quiet ceremony, and Alastair didn’t attend. She had been forced to ask Charles where he was and why he hadn’t come to his own father’s funeral. Charles didn’t know the answer either, said something about Alastair being upset and indisposed, but she could tell it didn’t make sense to him either.

Determined not to let him slip away from her like he always did, she went to his room after the funeral, knocking on the door. No response. When she was younger, Alastair would yell at her to go away, he would get angry that she had the nerve to bother him. As awful as that was, his silence was worse.

‘Please, Alastair,’ she said. ‘I know you’re in there. I don’t know why you didn’t come to the funeral, and maybe it was just too hard… But people asked about you, where you’ve been. And I want to be there for you. Just let me in, and we can talk about.’

‘Leave me alone, Cordelia!’ she heard from the other side of the door. He didn’t open it. ‘I don’t care Father is dead, that’s why I didn’t go the funeral. You shouldn’t either.’

It was not the answer she’d expected, although it wasn’t the first time it had seemed like Alastair did not love Father. Sometimes she wondered if Alastair could feel anything at all. She guessed not. There was ice inside his heart, and Cordelia did not know how to reach him anymore. Perhaps it didn’t matter.

With Father gone, her mother was Queen-Regent for now, taking on all of Father’s duties with some help from Alastair here and there until his coronation. Her mother was pregnant, and Cordelia didn’t think it would be good for her to spend so much time working while expecting a child. At least the pregnancy meant that once the baby was here, she would have someone to play with.

In four months, Alastair would turn twenty one and would be crowned king. He only ever spent time preparing for his coronation and his reign, Charles always hovering around him. It was impossible to catch him alone.

Of course, a coronation brought opportunities. Alastair couldn’t be crowned in a small, private ceremony, people from all over the country and even beyond would be invited. Cordelia would finally have a chance to meet actual real life people.

***

Alastair did not attend his father’s funeral. He’d expected knowing his father was gone would bring relief. No more hiding the empty bottles, no more covering up his sickness. No risk Cordelia would find out. Most of all, no risk Father would decide he was too dangerous and would chain him in the dungeons. He had never forgotten that day and even now he still had nightmares. Father had always been cruel to him, and he thought his death would set Alastair free. Instead, he felt empty, he felt a horrible guilt for hating a man who was now dead. He felt the snow and ice tingling against his fingers, seeking release. He pushed it back down with all he had. Conceal, don’t feel, that was what his father had taught him. No emotion, push it all down. Alright then, he would not feel. He would not mourn Father, would not care that he was gone. He would not attend the funeral and pay his respects, it was too dangerous anyway, and Father did not deserve that.

He knew people would ask why, where he’d been, and he made something up about being too sick and overcome with grief to attend. It was a lie. Even without the risk of exposing his ice, he would not have wanted to attend. He hated his father, and he couldn’t bear to listen to people speak on what a great king he’d been. Worse, what a great father he’d been. And there was no one he could talk to. Charles didn’t know what Father was really like, he believed in the lie of his illness. Cordelia was the same, worse even, for she adored Father, she always had. He’d considered telling her the truth, but that would be selfish. It would break her heart, and for what? And Mother had loved Father. Now that he was gone, she wanted to remember the good parts. She was having another baby, and was devastated the baby would never meet his father. Lucky child, he thought. That almost sounded like he resented the baby for getting the safe and carefree childhood he had never had, but that wasn’t true. He was almost glad Father was gone for their sake, and he hoped the baby would grow up happy and loved and protected, even if Alastair could provide none of that himself. It was too dangerous and he would never forgive himself if anything happened to the baby because of him.

***

‘Alastair, are you in there?’

No response. Sona had gotten used to that at this point. She had grown more worried every day. Alastair was to be king in a couple of months, but he had barely left his private quarters since Elias’ death. The only person he spoke to was Charles, and even then Charles had confided in her that he felt Alastair pull away from him. That he wasn’t sure Alastair was ready to be king.

She’d thought, perhaps, as his mother she could reach him. Charles didn’t know about the ice despite them being very close. But with her and Cordelia, all Alastair did was push them away.

He had seemed happy, at least, when she’d told him of her pregnancy, excited to meet the new baby. Mostly, he’d been terrified though and Sona thought perhaps Alastair was scared he’d hurt the baby. She didn’t know what to do anymore. She had to protect her baby, of course, but Alastair was her child too and she didn’t know how to reach him.

Sona knocked on the bedroom door once more. He couldn’t hide in there forever. It was Charles who opened, wearing a dressing robe. Sona knew Charles had been sleeping in Alastair’s bedroom for the past years. It was a way, apparently, to make sure Alastair’s virtue was intact for marriage. Not that Alastair had shown any interest in getting married and with his ice, Sona feared it was too dangerous. She wasn’t sure how Alastair had managed to keep his ice from Charles while sharing a bed, but that was impressive, right?

It pained her, she wanted nothing more than for Alastair to be happy, but she didn’t know how. She’d considered going back to Tessa, had asked Elias to reconsider, but he’d refused. ‘Alastair belongs here,’ Elias used to say. ‘That witch will only take him away from us.’

And now he was to be crowned king and it was too late. At least Charles had been good for him, right? Sona had noticed the way Alastair lit up around Charles, the way he seemed so eager to please him.

‘Your Majesty,’ Charles addressed her. ‘If I knew you were coming, I would have dressed for the occasion.’

‘I am sorry,’ Sona said. ‘Did I wake you? I didn’t realize you tucked in early, I’ve always been a late sleeper myself. I was just looking for Alastair, is he here?’

‘No, he must have left when I was asleep. Usually he goes to the bathroom, his own private one. Even I am not allowed in there. He’s very attached to his privacy.’

Sona knew about the bathroom, the place he went to when he lost control. It was good for him to have such a place right? Somewhere it didn’t matter if the ice became too much for him, because no one would get hurt.

Sona forced a smile. ‘Thank you Charles. I think I’ll look for him there.’

‘I don’t think he’d like that.’

‘He’s my son, and I am worried about him.’

‘He’s been showing progress in his lessons lately,’ Charles said. ‘I do not think you have to worry.’

Sona just nodded, and closed the door. Charles was smart, responsible, and he knew politics, but sometimes she felt he didn’t know Alastair, didn’t understand him. Risa hated Charles, acted as if he’d stolen Alastair away from them, but Sona felt that was a bit too simplistic. It was a difficult situation for everyone, and they were all doing the best they could. Alastair had chosen to spend his time around Charles, and if that was what made him feel better, who was she to judge?

Sona knocked on the bathroom door. No response.

‘Alastair, I’m coming in!’ she called.

She didn’t like invading his privacy, but at least he’d be forced to acknowledge he was in there if he wanted to stop her. He didn’t say anything. Perhaps he wasn’t in the bathroom after all, but it couldn’t hurt to check.

She pulled on the door handle. It wouldn’t budge. Had Alastair locked himself in there? When she pulled a little harder, it broke open and Sona realized why she’d been unable to open the door. It was frozen. Everything in the bathroom was frozen, about half a meter of snow lying on the floor. It was a good thing the door opened to the outside, or she would not have gotten it open at all.

Alastair was lying on the snow, covered in a thin summer blanket. The cold had never bothered him, but he had always liked to hold a blanket when he slept. When he was little, he would sleep with a thin summer blanket in the coldest days of winter, perfectly content.

Should she wake him? He seemed peaceful, at least, now that he was asleep. But he had lost control in here before falling asleep, and she wanted to know what had happened. He hadn’t responded well to his father’s death, and she knew Elias and Alastair had never had the best relationship, but instead of grieving with her and Cordelia, he’d shut them out even more. Sona didn’t think he was alright.

Before she could make a decision, Alastair opened his eyes and pushed himself into a sitting position. Sona wrapped her arms around herself, it was freezing cold in here. That couldn’t be good for the baby, but she was determined to talk to her son.

‘What happened, azizam?’ she asked.

‘I’m sorry, maman,’ he said. ‘I lost control.’

‘I know,’ she said softly. ‘What happened?’

‘I was with Charles,’ he said. ‘He told me he’d been writing with the Duke of Weselton.’

Sona frowned. ‘What’s wrong with that? He’s one of our closest trading partners. Charles has not sabotaged our relationship with Weselton, has he?’

‘No, not like that. You see, the Duke has a daughter around my age and no other heir, and Charles wants to marry her. She will be here for the coronation, and Charles intends to propose there. He thinks the Duke is a powerful ally for him as well as for us. And the laws in Weselton are pretty backward, so if the Duke dies his daughter’s husband will inherit the title, the lands, everything.’

Sona knew Charles liked power, of course. Risa hated him for it, thought he couldn’t be trusted, but Sona couldn’t help but see that even if Charles was a little too power hungry for his own good, Alastair adored him. But if he took the title and became Duke of Weselton, why would that upset Alastair so much? Wouldn’t he be happy for his friend?

‘What does any of that have to do with you?’

Alastair sighed. ‘I know, it’s stupid. But he’ll leave me alone if he marries her. He’d go live in Weselton in the Duke’s palace. He cannot stay here anymore. He’s all I have, I couldn’t bear it if he left.’

Sona took his hand. It was ice cold. ‘You always knew he would return home someday, right? Charles was here to teach you and prepare you, and he has done that. You are ready to be king, joon-am. I know controlling the ice is hard, but you’re smart and compassionate and you will do fine if he’s not there.’

Secretly Sona thought perhaps Alastair would do even better without Charles there. She knew Alastair was kinder, and she feared perhaps it came from a place of self loathing but Alastair was not the kind of king who’d put his own needs before anyone else’s.

Alastair nodded weakly. ‘But I’d be all alone. When Charles and I first became friends, it was the first time I could control myself. As long as it was going well, I mean. I did sometimes lose control when he was upset with me, but he never saw. I don’t know what I’ll do when he’s gone.’

Alastair was crying. The tears froze into snowflakes before they even reached his cheeks. Watching her son cry had always been one of the strangest thing, as if he started snowing. It was heartbreaking to watch, and Sona wished she could hug him, but she knew Alastair wouldn’t let her. He was far too scared he’d hurt the baby.

‘You’re going to be alright,’ Sona said. ‘You’re lonely, I know that. Cordelia is too. But the coronation offers opportunities. Perhaps you’ll meet someone else who helps calm your moods and your ice. You could invite someone to stay, if you want, open the gates.’

Alastair shook his head. ‘It’s too dangerous. Charles is the only one I can trust. I tried, maman. I tried with Cordelia, but every time I go near her I am so scared I’ll hurt her and then the ice takes over.’

‘Perhaps we should return to Tessa,’ Sona suggested.

‘No. The coronation is too close. This curse, it can’t be controlled. Best to be alone, and do what’s right for Arendelle.’

Sona guessed if Alastair wouldn’t return to the village, she’d try to send an invitation for the coronation. Perhaps Tessa could come here and help figure out why Alastair couldn’t control the ice. It was the least she could do for her son.

#Alastair Carstairs #Cordelia Carstairs #Sona Carstairs #Charles Fairchild #Conceal don't feel #Frozen AU #fanfiction #the last hours #tlh

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ethien · 3 years

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Hiiii. ( ´ ▽ ` )/ I have one unusual request. Yiga clan!Link x Sheikah!fem!reader. I'm not against lemon(͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

OMG..I finish it. AHHH! >.<

It can be that the smut part is shorter than I expected...but all in all, I really had fun with the idea. I am also really sorry it took so long. My mood hardly swings in october and well, I was often ill in november ._. And well, I love gaming and when I found a game, I am gaming.

Hope you like what I created.

Age of Sexuality

Words: 5.082

It got dark outside while you waited outside your house. The dark times were the dangerous times of your village – the enemies often attack your village in the dark. They often harm the people, sometimes they kidnap them. You were part of the protection team. You were a skilled sheikah warrior, so you can defeat the enemy – the yiga.

The yiga were once part of your tribe – but something happened in the past and now, they were the enemy of the kingdom of Hyrule. You often asked what happened – but no one ever answered your question. They also often told you not to ask – Foolish you thought in your opinion.

Maybe there was a way to understand them without crossing the blades.

Tonight, you hoped that you will get your answers. Why you were so confident in it?

Since some time, you had a feeling of eyes on you. There was someone who looked over you and you were sure, it was a yiga. You caught sometimes some shadows from him…And you were sure it was a him. His posture was quite manly and strong – he moved very smooth and agile and he should have golden blond hair – what was quite unnormal for a yiga. You just did not know his face – but you guessed he must be a handsome one.

Maybe you had a little crush on him – your enemy. If he really was your enemy. He often watched you without attacking which wasn’t really yiga-like. It was true you were fascinated about the unknown and maybe you had your fantasies with dealing with the enemy as a friend…or more.

You shook your head. There was another time you could dream your pervert fantasies. It was more important to save your village and even if you found your enemy utterly hot, he still was an enemy.

You hoped you could catch him for information.

There was a rustling sound in the near. There was no wind – so it should be him. You tried to act like just stargazing. You hoped he was silly enough to think you just do nothing. He did and it played you in the cards.

In seconds he jumped out of his hideout – it seemed he wanted to capture you – but you were faster. You put out your swords and the fight could start.

It was like you assumed – manly posture with some muscles, blond hair, agile, smooth and a good fighter.

You did not know why but he seemed to holding back his skills. He just parried and did not try to harm you. You really did not know why he does that – but it played you in the cards. In seconds, you put your swords away and attacked him with yourself. He never saw this coming and could not react.

So, you could slam him in the ground and captured him.

Now you sat there in your house. Only some candles lighten up the room. He was bind against the pillar. He could not move his body, his arms or his legs. And he seemed not happy about it – but you guessed he would be.

“So, yiga” you started talking and looked at the masked man before you. “A reason you wanted to kidnap me? Isn’t it easier to just…well…killing me?”

He was silent.

“Or did you all kipdnap us for providing your tribe new people? I mean, every tribe needs kids to grow. Would be natural your tribe do that”

He only snorted.

“Oh, I found a weak spot. A bit pathetic, you have to say. Kidnapping…so you just have childs. But it would suit your loveless structure. Like what woman would be willing to be a wife of a yiga…”

Silence again.

“But well, I am not here to ask you what you do to create new member. I have…other questions”

He only snorted again – like he wanted to say Try it, I will say nothing.

“Nice try…but this will not work” you said. You put your hands over the masked and took them down.

It was like you said – he really was a handsome one. His blond hair was in a high ponytail like other yiga. Clear blue eyes – no one would guess these eyes could harm others and still, there was something dangerous in them. He did not look like a usual yiga. He looked more hylian with sheikah vibes to you than any other yiga did.

“I guess you could speak better without that piece of wood”

He looked angry at you. But not the angry like You will pay for it. It was more like an embarrassing thing.

“So, before we start our like chat - What’s your name?”

“What?” he just said surprised. He had a calming voice. Manly, but also calming. You guessed he was also your age.

“Discussing things, it better with knowing each other better. I’m [Y/N]”

“A bit foolish to say your enemy your name”

“Maybe…but you have to say it made the atmosphere better”

“What atmosphere? We are enemies”

“We are? I don’t think so”

He looked very surprised at you.

“Well, your tribe is my enemy, that’s true. But I don’t think you not”

“And how do you think that?”

“Well...” you started. “You had enough opportunities to kidnap me. And there was a lot where I was without weapons…or cloths…” You could not hide the slight pink around your cheeks. “But you didn’t. Even in our fight, you hold back. There must be a reason”

You saw how he also got a little slight pink around his cheeks.

“So, tell me…what’s your deal with me?”

His deal was something else than kidnapping you. But it was too embarrassing to tell. If someone from the clan would know it, he would be surely dead.

Everything started with a task to observe you. Why you?

He got told you were one of the skillest warriors in the village, you were related to impa and you seemed to have a good influence for the kingdom. Someone said there was a rumor you could be the next sheikah warrior appointed to princess Zelda. And this was something his clan wanted to delete. If they know more about your daily life pattern, it was easy to kidnap and then kill you.

As one of the best yiga, he got the task and well…at the beginning, it was just boring observing for him. He learnt everything about you – how you train, how your life is and how you are. And it happens what should not happen – He got interested in you.

He saw why you were the chosen one and why everyone likes you. He also saw how popular you were with others…maybe that got him a bit jealous. The more he observes, the more he wanted to get in touch with you…making you to his wife. He even thinks asking his leader that instead of killing you, he would be observe you until the rest of your life. He wasn’t sure what this feeling was.

Now he really should kidnap you and he fucked up. He thought he does not need to fight seriously – then he could catch you to the yiga hide out and live in peace for the rest of their lives.

And now, you got him.

You were pretty interested in the history of the clan. With the yiga before you, you had your answers. You wished he would say something more to you but well…after your deal question, he went silent. It seemed he had to think about things.

“It seemed you don’t want to say why. Well, okay. The question wasn’t the question I want an answer for. Instead, just answer me some others…more clan related…”

He eyed you a bit suspicious.

“You want to know about…us? Did you not get information about us from the village and the eldest?”

“Sure, I got some. But the information is from their view. I don’t know the view from a yiga itself. Maybe there are reasons why you act how you act…”

“And with getting it… you believe, you can find a solution?” he hissed at you.

“I guess No. But I can understand it better and can decide on my own what is right” you said.

“Why that?” he asked. It got him really curious.

“Just doing tasks without deep thinking isn’t my style. I am not like that. You can ask a lot people here – I am not doing everything they asked me to do”

He remembered situations where you acted different from others. You acted in your way. Maybe this was a thing why you were a danger for the clan.

“And why do you believe I would tell you things? I will get myself into trouble if they knew I talk”

“Oh, you really think you will get out of here?” you smirked at him. “I am not silly that I let you go after I got what I want. I can easily talk to my people and you will be our prisoner. Do you really think they did not know I already caught you? We talk about your clan. Traitors and Failures end in death”

He was astonished you know that.

“And I really don’t think that you are a full-hearted yiga.”

“Yeah?”

“It seemed more you did it because you have nothing else. And if you be serious with fighting, you could easily live on your own.”

It got silent between you two again.

“I got a task to observe you” he started talking. You just nod and sat down. “I should study your patterns so we could kidnap you in the future”

“We see that this wasn’t successfully” you said.

“Ha ha, yeah I know” he said sarcastically. “Well yeah, I started the task and it was pretty boring. At the beginning it was…But with the time…”

He hesitated a bit while talking. “I got more curious about you…I wanted to know more about you…”

You were unsure in which way this talk leads.

“I can now finally understand why everyone is interested in you…Good fighter, strong mind, you are always yourself, handsome…”

You were unsure if you heard it right that he maybe flirted with you without the intention to do. He was…curious about you? And he found you…handsome?

You feel flattered and a slight blush across your cheeks.

“If…if this is a trick, I will not fall for it” you said embarrassed.

He wanted to say something when he saw your blush. You seemed touched by his words and the idea you also could like him got a bit more realistic.

“I don’t trick you. I was honest with you”

There was an attractive man before you. A man who said he was interested in you. And after all, your tribes are enemies. It seemed right and wrong at the same time.

“This would explain why you also observe me while bathing” you murmured a bit. He could hear it and got a bit red.

He remembered quite well the days you bath. The first time was a shock for him to see you…well...naked. But very fast, he could not stop admiring your naked body only covered by the water. It made is mind goes wild and he would be lying when he said he got not turned on by it. Maybe there were times he also touched himself while watching…wishing he was next to you…wishing he could give you the feeling he had at the moment.

“I can…I cannot deny…. that I did that” he murmured and looked shyly away.

Now you had your answers – He was into you. A man where you had your fantasies with.

“So,you really enjoyed it seeing me…naked?” An idea formed in your little pervert brain. You could also ask him later more things. He nods.

Now…you wanted some fun.

“You didn’t answer my question before”

“What question?”

“Your name. I think the next hours will be pretty…interesting for both of us…and it feel more polite to know the name from each other…So, what’s your name? I’m [Y/N] after all”

He groaned a bit.

“Link”

“Sounds cute” you admit and could observe his pink blush.

“So…Link…You enjoyed seeing me naked. I guess it is a thing that made you speak”

Link could not believe what his ears hear. What on earth was your plan? Your smirk was dangerous.

“I think I cannot follow your words”

“That’s okay. Just follow what I am doing”

You closed the door and the curtains. You turned your back to the door and faced him. Slowly, you put down your jacket.

Link really was unsure what you were doing and what on hell do you do to him? Did you enjoy it playing with him? What’s your intention?

You walked in a slow way to him and smirked playfully.

You moved your hands to your zipper for your body outfit. Slowly you unzip it before him. You had his eyes all on you. He seemed unsure and excited at the same time. It was new to him that an enemy who is also a bit his crush, is undressing before himself.

Link cursed himself how easy you could play with him. He wanted to get his revenge – on the other side, he wanted to explore every part of the nude body before him.

“You like what you see,huh?” you joked and turned around. You acted like you wanted to grab something on the floor. Link had the perfect view on your back…and your butt and some part of your pussy.

For yourself, you had to admit you pretty liked this game with the domination. It was kind of embarrassing being naked around a stranger – but you felt safe with him…even with the thing he was your enemy.

You could feel his eyes on you and you had a feeling, you could sense his growing desire. In the side of your eye, you saw his lust and frustration on the same time. He seemed to feel uncomfortable in his pants and the fact he is binded, did not play in his cards. It really seemed he wants it…but can’t have it. And this played in your cards.

It was pretty, damn hard for Link right now. It was clear what you did to him. It was of course clear what you want from him besides some information. But he must tell: He is also very interested in it. Maybe it was also a hidden desire – being intimate with an enemy. Even when you said, you both were not.

However, there was a little problem. He was binded. He was now in your hands. And even that he likes being dominated, he really wants his payback. So, he needed to cut down his binding and well…then pinning you down and show you how merciless he can be with his “enemy”.

The plan to hide his growing bulge is a plan he could really forget. It was too obvious. And painful he had to admit.

He already saw you naked but not in this near to him. He could see every curve, every old wound, every scar. He could even smell you – sweet but also a bit…natural. How you moved earlier in your fight…pretty hot. And the imagine fighting naked did not really help his desire to fuck you right now.

He was unsure how strong a desire can be…even with not knowing each other. And well…with the damn history between their clans.

Link wasn’t sure when it all started. He often got told it all started with some of them who questioned some actions from the kingdom. Lies, Betrayal and punishments leads some to left the sheikah tribe. They started searching for a new goal, far away from what the sheikah did. So they researched and learned about the past. The past about the conflicts with ganondorf. They found the truth behind and that the kingdom was the real enemy in this point.

He really questioned the history of his tribe. It seemed logical in his mind.

That they need to observe the hope of the sheikah tribe – impa, purrah, Robbie and you.

Link thought you all would plan something terrible. But everything he saw was…you all did research of antic technology. And well, guarding the royal family.

It did not make sense in his view with what he got told and what he saw. And now with you before him – a naked sheikah woman ready to get fucked by him, a man of the yiga – everything was confusing for him.

It was true you were kind of special. You seemed to be interested in the history. You wanted to understand why you both should hate each other.

You saw that he had to think about something intensive. You were not sure what about. However, you will not let down the atmosphere what already started around you two.

You slowly approached him and before he could say something or move, you sat yourself in his lap.

You took him really off-guard and he was now just a different man than the fighting man some hours ago.

A wave of desire and lust went over you. You could not believe how strong you wanted someone you still don’t know and well…who could kill you if he wants to.

He was around your age, he was indeed handsome and you believe, he was an honest man. He also was attracted to you. He slightly confessed to you. And his bulge you could feel between your legs was also something what let you think this way.

He was unsure where he should look. Into your face was embarrassing. But he could not stare on your boobs or everything else. Everything was tempting to look at but also embarrassing.

He was silent and it wasn’t a state you wanted. So you slightly pushed your ass against the bulge.

He pressed his lips together that the sound his lips wanted to escape did not go out. He strongly concentrated to wear his mask. His deep red blush said something else and it was utterly cute for you.

“My, my. Are we holding back?” you teased. “Don’t want to admit to be turned on?”

He just snorted by your comment.

“I clearly remember you said you were attached to me. But well, I don’t know you are so proud not to admit a weak point…” You pushed again; he holds back again. “…to someone”

“What do you play?”

“What?”

“Well, I don’t get what you want. The first second you want more information about the yiga and the second, you really want to get fucked by me”

You just chuckled.

“Why not both? Because I can admit I find you pretty attractive. And maybe I can let out my moans if you find my weak spots” you said to him. “If I let you free. Now I just enjoy the hand I have above you”

“Pervert” he hissed.

“Said the one who peck at someone in the bath”

If you could see what Link really did, you would not be calm and teasing. While you teased him, he started to cut off his bindings. He was sure he will not harm you if he got free. But he wanted his payback for the teasing. And you admitted you wanted sex with him.

It was indeed hard to concentrate to cut off and not moaning. Pretty, damn hard.

He just needed a good time to surprise you. And then, he would fuck you merciless.

You tried to do the ass thing another time but you had to admit to yourself it got pretty boring. He was too quiet and concentrated for you. You had to take the action in the hand. So you drew circled on the bulge, touch the top of it or just push it. The hidden sounds of pleasure from him was your reward. You pretty knew he wanted his payback. But how when he was binded? You really enjoyed having the top side.

“It gets boring when you said nothing” you whined playfully. “Are we really THAT proud?”

You smirked and stand up from his lap. You turned your back to him and looked around your house. A big fault for you.

While you watched back, Link could finally cut off and was now a free man. He saw from afar the bed. A good place for the things he had now in mind doing with you.

It was time to get in action. In seconds, he stands up, went behind you and took one arm around your neck. With the other, he pushed your body against him.

“Guess the leading hand changed, my dear” he said to you. Normally, others would fight to get free. You were pretty calm. However, he could feel your excitement about the change.

While you two slowly walked to bed, he drew circles by your thighs. You already get it was his way of teasing.

“If you think this let me moan, then I have to disappoint you.”

“Don’t worry – that’s just foreplay”

You two arrived at the bed. How rough he catches you, how carefully he laid you there. It was indeed a bit charming you had to admit.

He sat himself on your hips, so you could not escape. You did not mind the weight – you knew it was safe with him. And well, the thought what will happen next was more interesting to you.

Link admired every inch of your body before him. From the near, you were just as beautiful as from afar. Your skin, your little goosebumps, your breasts that just fits perfectly in his hands, your thighs, your slightly spread legs which’s shows some bits of your vagina.

“Isn’t it a bit uncomfortable…in these cloths?” you asked and took him a bit off-guard.

“Hmm?”

You just poked his visible bulge.

“Or are you used to this? Little turn on?” you joked.

“Or do you just want to see me naked?”

“Good point” you started. “I mean, it made things easier. And to be honest, I am a bit curious by that huge thing here”

“I have a feeling you want to see more of my dick than me”

“Well, can be true. So, would you please undress yourself? Or do you need some…help?”

You smirked at him, he also smirked back.

“If you wish it, then go ahead”

You took him by word und searched for the zipper of his outfit. You slowly put down the zipper and you could observe how slowly you could see more skin from him. It was clear he had a good figure but to see the real thing was something else.

“Like what you see?” he teased while you admire him. You could not hide a slight blush.

“Yeah, I do. You should often wear nothing”

“Really? Well, when it distracted my enemies, why not?” he laughed a bit.

“But for now, we should stop this playing around” Link said. “We are not here for admiring each other naked. I remember you wanted my dick inside you”

With this, he just smirked and left his position on your hips.

He laid himself more over you, so you could feel his weight. You didn’t mind at all. Your skins touched and this was something what turned you on.

He felt warm and strong but also soft. With his hair now open, he did not look like someone from the yiga clan.

You felt goosebumps over your skin when you finally could feel his hard member between your legs.

On the other side, Link could also sense how wet you were for him. And his dick was just between your legs. And you were already in a welcoming position for his member.

You both were silent and stand still for a moment. You just looked in each other’s faces. There was lust and desire in your eyes. Both of you could not wait but on the same time, you two wanted to live in the moment as long as you could.

“Are you…ready?” Link asked and you could see a little caring in his eyes. You both were still stranger but still…it was a sweet move of him. He really wasn’t your enemy.

“I am when you are”

He smiled sweetly at you. You did not know if this was the caring moment of him or the atmosphere…but you had the urge to kiss him.

It was a light one and you took him off guard with it. But he accepted it.

His lips were soft but also a bit rough. It suited him.

When you parted, you looked a bit surprised at him.

“Do I have something in the face?” he asked.

“No…I am just surprised.”

“About what?”

“You did not taste like bananas”

His face was priceless.

“Do we have such a terrible view to others?”

“Well…you were our enemies who love…bananas”

“Just for you to know: I don’t like bananas”

With this, he just kissed you to shut you down. He really wanted to avoid the banana topic.

His hands roam your body while your hands got a good hold on his hair and his back. Your making out was sloppier than expected. You guessed both of you were kind of new to this.

He made his way to your cheek and then to your jawline with placing small kisses. Automatically, you tug his hair a bit harder which made him a bit growl.

It was both clear you two could not wait any longer.

However, you hold a bit your breath and you felt kind of...nervous.

“Hey…everything alright?”

“Hm?”

Link looked directly into your eyes – he notices your nervous state. He really looked caring at you.

“We…don’t have to do it…if you don’t want it.”

“No..it’s…”

“Yeah?”

“It’s just…. it’s my first time…”

“And you prefer to have it with someone else?”

“No…it’s just…I am just nervous, ok?”

He just chuckled which little pissed you off a bit.

“What?”

He turned back to you.

“I know this will break my ego complete…You’re…not alone with it”

“You seemed pretty confident in what you are doing”

“But it’s true. I know we could stab each other with blades and I am not afraid of it. But here…it is pretty easy to get hurt…while doing it...you know…and…”

“We are both some nervous idiots...” you just admitted. It really made you glad you were not alone with the feeling.

“I really want this…with you. Let us try…doing it good…”

“And the next time we learn from this one?”

Now you had to chuckle.

“Interesting. There will be a next time?”

“I guess…we discuss this afterwards”

With this, he adjusted himself a bit comfortable between your legs. He takes a hold of his dick and guides it to your opening before putting a little bit in. You cry out in pain, feeling the discomfort in your voice, he stops.

„I was just…surprised…“

He went down deeper while you tried to handle the pain. You looked in his face and could saw how concentrated he was. He really doesn’t want to hurt you.

When he was fully inside you, you both got silent and looked into each other’s faces. It was time to get used to the new situation.

You could feel his length inside you while he could feel your thigh walls around him. It was new, a bit scaring but also…satisfied for both of you.

He slowly started moving. Little moans escaped both of you. He searched for a good pace for both of you. You also started moving your hips alongside him.

You curled your legs around his to stay connected while he thrusted in and outside you. It feels like your bodies melted together to one. He threw his head back in his neck and tried to concentrate.

Your skins made some weirds clashing noises but no one of you did not mind or leaving a thought to it. You ignored all the sweat on your bodies, all the noises you made – the moment together was everything what counts to both of you.

You couldn’t hide a loud moan while he pounds in and outside you. However, he also was quite noisy. He gripped onto your hips and pound harder into you. You gripped the sheets from your bed by the hard contact and the sexual feeling which went over you. Your vision blurred a bit when you feel your climax was there. In seconds, you could feel how everything felt from you and how relaxed you got.

You slowly breathed in and out and tried to think what just happened.

While you were with the head above the clouds, Link went out of you after he heard that you came. He still was hard and well, his climax was nearly there. It’s kind of frustrated him he could not come with you. But he did not have time for it. He needs a release, so he put the action in his on hand. In seconds, he bumped his dick hard up and down to achieve his climax.

You were back when he felt something hot between your legs. That’s where you saw how he had come on your legs with his seed. In seconds, he also collapsed over you and it got silent again between you two.

It felt like hours, but it was just minutes.

Now you realized the sweet, the feeling of his sweat body on you, his seed on your legs. It felt kind of…weird.

“I don’t want to ruin the moment…” you started. “But can you please stand up from me? I want to bath”

Link was a bit confused from it, but he did what you wanted. He sat himself on bed while you walked in the bath and cleaned yourself.

Soon after, he followed and also cleaned himself.

“It was…good” he said while you both cleaned yourself. “I had a different imagine of it how it will be…but it was…good”

You just chuckled.

“What?”

“It sounded so ridiculous. We were so horny on each other and expected something else. But in the end…it was pretty nice. So yeah…about the second time you mentioned before...”

“Where did I mention it?”

“When your dick was just inside me...”

“Oh, there!”

No one would think by this conversation, your clans were enemies.

“So, lets make a deal. The next time you tried to kidnap me…let us talk about our clans…and have a good time. Deal?”

“Deal!”

101 notes · View notes

hellodahliah · 3 years

Note

8,28,47 for Delphi (I know you posted some of her backstory, but I’m curious to know more)

@1o8percent i’m so happy you’re interested in delphi and her story. this was so fun for me to write and it also made me so excited to share more about her and her life. thank you for the ask, dear 🥺❤️

8. What is their back story?

so delphi is the oldest sibling of two and her family is a mix between normal people and spellcasters. her mother, sybil, came from a very noble spellcaster family. sybil’s parents did not approve of her marriage to her father, jacob. he was not from a wealthy family, and he was not either a spellcaster. they were afraid of what he would do, if he found out about them and their abilities.

for a long time sybil and her family had to hide their abilities and true selves from the world in fear of being hunted down by paranormal hunters. spellcasters, vampires and other occults had struggled with oppression and hunters for a very long time, luckily people aren't that judgmental and afraid of occults anymore that they would want to hunt them down. however, paranormal hunters still exist, and there's always a reason to be careful.

the name spellcaster has with time become more and more used instead of witch. it sounds less wicked and scary.

so jacob had to work hard to gain sybil’s parents approval and trust. still when they figured out he was not a bad person they would remain wary around him, refusing to give their blessing for him to marry her. until one accident where he finally learnt the true nature of her family. it all happened during a fishing trip to granite falls, where they had rented a boat together and jacob, had caught a big fish that was strong enough that made them both fall out the boat. in panic and because of her instincts, sybil used her abilities to stop their fall mid air. the next moment their boat is ashore filled with fish. and jacob is sitting there looking at her with a surprised expression. she tries to erase his memories of everything. but he wouldn't let her, he tells her he wouldn't care less if she is a spellcaster or not.

so with a long meeting between her parents, sybil and jacob are finally given their blessings to marry.

so a little more than a year later delphi is born. sybil gave her the name delphine because she thought she sounded like a dolphin when she cried and her parents' honeymoon was spent in sulani where they swam together with the dolphins.

four years later her brother gideon was born. delphi and gideon couldn't be more different from each other. delphi was more quiet and kept to herself, while gideon loved to spend time with friends and bike around the neighborhood and he always found himself in trouble. but he was not a mean person or a troublemaker, just very active and adventurous. gideon was very interested in magic and he really wanted to become a wizard when he grew old. delphi again was terrified of magic, mostly because she struggled with controlling her powers resulting in scary incidents for her. she made her own bike fly at one time when she was about to fall of from it it. delphi was interested in art, animals and fashion. her dream was to become a fashion designer.

gideon and delphi got along well, and would do things together. she didn't have many friends, because she was more quiet and reserved so he would sometimes invite her to hang out with him or his friends. and they would also do stuff together like going to cinemas etc. but when her powers grew stronger and his never developed he grew more insecure and bitter around her. he spent less time with her and started to shut her out from his life. this caused a rift in their relationship that sadly still has to be fixed.

delphi spent more time at the magic realm with her mom, and she learnt how to control her powers. spending time at the magic realm made her realize that magic is not that scary after all ( if you can control it ). she started to become more interested in fortunetelling and what kind of things was found in the shop in caster's alley. she started to collect tarot cards.

delphi became more and more invested in the skill of fortunetelling, and she would sometimes fortune tell her classmates. or more likely it went like this: they found her sitting around, practicing with her tarot decks, which they found to be super cool, so they bombarded her with questions and then asked her to fortune tell them.

delphi met her husband in high school. he had a lot of friends, and was always surrounded by people. they met each other in art class, he found her style super unique. ( she kind of had her abstract painting period back then ) he had decided ( *cough* felt pressured to *cough* ) pick up art. his parents were art critics and their world revolved around art. he liked art, but he was more interested in tattoos and street art ( which his parents thought was trashy ). but he was even more interested in nature and biology. he loved insects. so that was what delphi and him bonded over. delphi loved butterflies, and he liked all sorts of insects. they spent more time with each other, they became friends and then feelings turned into something more. however none of them dared to confess to the other.

they ended up at different universities, he went to foxbury to study biology and physics as a minor subject while delphi studied art history and business in britechester.as time spent they started to drift apart, finding new friends at university etc. they were both living their lives, doing their own things.

delphi ended up in a not so healthy relationship, which ended horribly. afterwards she struggled a bit with her mental health and she started to listen more to her gut feelings about people. she starts to over analyze everything and everyone and becomes more paranoid.

her husband noticed a difference in her personality, and confronted her about it. he was worried. that’s where he confesses he really loved her and that he wouldn’t let anything happen to her. they doesn’t start to date yet, because it is too soon after the break up... both of them are straight out of broken relationships. they spends a lot more time with each other. and he eventually moves in with her more like him spending so much time at her place that all his things eventually end up there.

they ended up marrying each other and they had two children cosima and roy. these two also have a four year gap between them. delphi worries her children will face similar problems her and gideon had. so she makes sure they get along well with each other. she plans a lot of family activities. sundays are usual called family day, meant to spend with family alone.

delphi starts to think more and more about opening a mystic shop. it is dangerous and risky because she risks outing herself as a spellcaster if she isn’t being careful. however, more and more people are becoming accepting around the occult and finds it super cool instead.

occult sims don’t have that many places/shops that sell things they need to survive like plasma fruits, plasma packs, antidotes towards wolfsbane etc.

when her husband died delphi struggled a lot. her family had a rough year. dealing with the loss of a parent for her children and a loss of a husband. her husband was a very strong and brave person, he was in fact the family's pillar of strength and her biggest cheerleader. he helped her with her business he even supported her when she opened up about wanting to make business with her tarot.

her business life hasn’t been doing that well. she had to close her shop in willow creek due to the hectic year and instead she is welcoming customers to her home. however, when the time is right she’ll consider re-opening the shop again.

28. How do they get out of a difficult situation?

this depends on the situation. she kind of has a tendency to freeze and shut down during stressful situations. her husband was the one who usually leapt in and kept his head cold. now with him gone she has to navigate through the situations herself.

normally delphi always put the needs of her children above her own, so they wouldn't suffer the consequences of the difficult situation. she would ask herself what her husband or someone she knows would do in her place. then her mind usually starts to roll and then she comes to the solution...

47. are they quick to judge?

she isn't judgmental, but she can easily pick up on other people's auras and vibes if they are good people or not or if they are out to get something from her.

#my oc #this was actually super fun to write #answer. 💀💌

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franeridart · 4 years

Text

Anon said: How are you just like "Oh these are just some warm up sketches" and post a full finished piece, while I'm over here sketching a triangle person and calling it a finished piece.

I dunno if this was a legit question asking for a legit answer, but I do happen to have a legit answer so I might as well give it! If I wanted to go into detals with it it’d take me forever though, so allow me to separate it into two points to make it easier

I learnt how to be very fast in putting down my lines and trained myself into not overthinking every single dot I put down. This took about five or six years of drawing daily and a whole life of drawing occasionally before then, because to do so you need to reach a point where you’re drawing something you’ve drawn so many times that by now your hand sort of goes without you needing to think about it much, so it’s not a fast process, but boy is it worth it. Mostly learning how to not overthink it, overthinking it used to be 90% of my time spent on a drawing and dear god did it suck the joy out of everything I drew

I have two very distinctive ways of approaching a drawing, one where I actually put effort in it and the other where I just want to let the squiggles out of my pen, and warm ups are the second one - the lack of effort I’m putting in can have different forms and show in different ways, so a warm up could be a fully colored piece as it could be just a pencil doodle, depending on where and on what exactly I’m being lazy: it could be the type of tool I’m using that allows me to draw without having to line, it could be a very tiny canvas that lets me avoid a ton of details a big canvas would demand. I might be cutting the time I usually put in making sure my anatomy is correct, I might be using a shading technique that takes a tenth of the time my usual one would, I might be using a style that’s just easier and faster to draw, or drawing characters I’ve drawn a trillion times in extremely generic poses and clothes. There’s a lot of things that I can do to make things faster for me! It’s skills you gain as you draw a lot - you learn how to draw things the hard way, and then you realize that along the way you learnt how to do them the easy way too

hope this actually answers your question! If it was a question at all lol if it wasn’t then sorry for rambling, please pretend I didn’t say anything hahaha

Anon said: I love your newest comic!!! So adorable!! I noticed Bakugou's mom does the affectionate hair rustle thing to him in the manga/anime, do you think Bakugou subconsciously does the same to show affection cause of it? I love the way you draw faces and poses, it's so expressive!!

Ahhhhh thank you so much!!! And yeah, it might be! After all we do take a lot from the people we live with even without realizing, and he’s already so similar to his mom!

Anon said: I saw your bakushima comic from October 9th (2019) where Bakugo falls asleep studying and Kirishima sets him down on the table properly and it was so soft my heart is crying

;;;;; !!!!!!!! I’m glad you liked it!! <3<3

Anon said: If it not to much, could I possibly get a Ochamina doodle pls? I just love some sweet lesbeans 👉👈

Awww I’m not taking requests right now, but I’ll keep it in mind for next time I want to doodle and don’t know what!

Anon said: I love your art! I envy you.

Please don’t! There’s a lot of reasons why being me isn’t a lot of fun - if it’s just my skill you envy, then all you gotta do is draw a lot!

Anon said: i just went through your entire kiribaku tag and omg it was beautiful seeing the progression in your art skills but still keeping the same funny/cute/heartwarming/etc traits you thought up for their dynamic!! i hope that makes sense haha !! love your art keep it up

It does make sense!!! Thank you so much both for looking through the whole tag and for thinking so, it means a lot to me!! ;;; <3<3

Anon said: Hey fran! I hope you're doing well(especially with quarantine and all)!! I really love your anatomy and how fluid and stylistic it can be! It's super fun to look at! I wanted to ask you if you ever did any in depth studies on anatomy? Like muscles and bones. I've heard a lot of artists mention the necessity of studying bones/muscles, i'd really like to know your opinion on the subject

Ahhh god thank you so much!! And... hmm let’s see if I can word this properly and have it make sense - always keeping in mind that this is just my opinion, of course!

If all you want to do is to draw, then all you need to do is to pick up your pencil and draw - it’s really that easy as far as I’m concerned. You don’t need to know anatomy in depth to just draw, everyone has seen a person, everyone knows how a person looks. That is, if all you want to do is to draw for the sake of drawing. If you want to draw an anatomically correct looking human being, though, you do need to know how anatomy works - and the deeper you’ll go into studying it the more correct your people will look. It’s kind how everyone can draw a bicycle, but if you want to draw a realistic bicycle you’re gonna need to look up references for it, you know? It’s all on the level at which you’re interested in drawing, the more technically skilled you want to be the more you’ll have to study

As for my personal experience with this, I hate studying with a passion. Studying puts a damper on my enjoyement of everything, and drawing isn’t excluded from this - you put a book in front of me expecting me to study it and suddenly I never want to pick up a pencil again. This means that I never sat down and studied anatomy in depth and all in one go just to learn how to draw a human being, but it doesn’t mean that I didn’t, slowly and now and again and in bits and pieces, study parts of the body to get a better understanding of it. I know better about the skeleton than I do about muscles, and I still have enough to learn about everything that anyone who’s studied anatomy properly would find a trillion mistakes in everything I draw, but my way of going about drawing has always been and always will be putting my enjoyement of it first and foremost, so I’m not interested in putting myself through a tour-de-force to learn everything there is to know about anatomy just to make my doodles look appealing to someone with a medical degree haha I’m just doing me, and when the mood is right I look up how to properly draw something, but until then I just do it as best as I can with my limited knowledge, being fully aware that what I’m producing is far from accurate but being willing to make that compromise for my own comfort

So that’s my opinion on it lol it all boils down to how important it is for you to know how to properly draw the human body - of course it’s gonna look more professional and better if you’ve studied it, but everyone has their own priorities, you know?

Anon said: Thank you for your hard work, seeing an upload from you is so nice, and the colors are so pretty

Thank you so muuuuccchhhhh!!!! TTATT <3<3<3

Anon said: Opinions on Tokoyami Fumikage 💕

One of my top faves in the whole manga, actually! I have a drawing in the making of him, I should get back to it..........

Anon said: HOLY SHIT FRAN THE TOES HOW YOU DRAW THE TOES SO WELL FEET ARE THE DEATH OF ME AND YOU’RE OVER HERE DRAWING TOES THEY’RE SO GOOD PLEASE TEACH ME YOUR WAYS!!! -❤️

Thank you!!!!!!!! So pretty much my way of learning this specific skill was being obsessed with elves when I was fifteen and wanting to draw them all the time and also for whatever reason being convinced that they were not supposed to wear shoes so I just drew a lot of feet with references and tutorials and stuff till I could draw my elves properly. Which isn’t necessarily what you need to do to learn how to draw feet, but, I mean, it worked for me lol

Anon said: I love ur Bnha ships and all but what would u do if some of them didn’t become canon??

Oh, I actually don’t care about that at all? I don’t expect most of them to become canon anyway - like, ochadeku sounds reasonable and kamijirou seems to be getting there, but everything else I never even considered it as an actual possibilily. I don’t really ship because I want to see my ships become canon, I just like the potential in what I can make with them? If that makes sense? They’re just fun to think about and I like making fancontent, that’s all there is to it really haha honestly if I had my way no ship would ever be canon ever ha ha ha

Anon said: Slep is for the wek

No actually sleep is for Frans who want a chance at getting up tomorrow morning without an headache for once, so I should do that and go to sleep already lmao

#fran answers #a couple of long ones in this one !!!!!#feeling blabbery tonight

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studywithdanielle · 4 years

Text

How to Study For: Uni Entrance Exams

14 JUL 2020

Hey guys! I’m currently studying for the TSA and I thought it would be helpful for me to consolidate my process so I can look back on it. Then I remembered that I have a studyblr (woop woop 🎉!) and that I can possibly help others by posting it on here.

NOTE: This is a strategy for exams consisting of multiple choice or short answer questions. If you’d like me to cover essay question prep, just let me know 🥰 !

Btw, I’m a conceptual learner that likes formulas so if this sounds like a rocket launch countdown, I deeply apologise ?.

What You’ll Need:

Internet - I mean, what don’t we use it for these days?

Practise papers

Practise questions

Phase 1 - Preparation

Step 1: Don’t panic

Okay you can panic a little, especially if you’ve left it late but not all hope is lost!

Yes, I know the ‘duh, duh, duh!!!’ didn’t help but panicking will only make you feel overwhelmed and will make the exam seem impossible. Here’s what you should do instead:

Step 2: Find out what the university actually wants

Why do they have an entrance exam anyway?

Especially in the UK, most universities don’t have an entrance exam so if they do, there’s a reason and you’re going to be Sherlock Holmes and find out why that is. Whilst it may seem like they’re trying to traumatise you, I don’t think they particularly enjoy marking a zillion papers 🤧.

What do they expect?

For most university courses, there are a grade requirements and knowing what those are is really helpful for setting your own expectations. If your course (likes mine) doesn’t require maths and there are maths problems on the exam, they won’t be at A-level, IB HL or AP standard.

What score should I be aiming for?

This links to the previous question but finding admissions stats for your subject will help you determine a mark that you’re aiming for. Many of these tests are not designed for really high marks so releasing that expectation early will save you a great deal of stress.

What skills are they testing?

For some entrance exams, the university will list out the skills they’re testing in their entrance exam. Practising these skills broadly will help you to develop them. For example, if they’re testing translation in a language entrance exam, reading in the target language and understanding it will be good practise because you’ll be able to convey ideas from another language if you understand them.

Step 3: Master your strategy

The worst thing that could happen in an exam is that you don’t know what to do or what to write. The best way to tackle that? Having a strategy. Sometimes just having something to do in an exam even if you don’t actually know what you’re doing gives your brain some time to stop freaking out and start problem-solving. To master your strategy, you need to:

Find out the question types

For example, the TSA is split into 2 sections (I have to do both 😭), one multiple-choice paper and one 30 minute essay. I know there are about 9-10 different types of questions targeting 2 skills: critical thinking and problem-solving. By doing this, I can work towards perfecting each question type and in theory will be able to do the whole of the first paper.

Figure out the timings

You can do this in minutes per mark or if there’s an advised amount of time you should spend on a particular type of question, take a note of this.

Figure out your process for each question type

Usually at the beginning of a book full of practise questions, there will be a description as to how best to approach each question. If there isn’t or you don’t have access to one, try looking up strategies on the wonder that is the Internet. If you’re still not sure, attempt questions with commentary answers so that id you get them wrong, you can create a strategy of your own using the tips you’ve gathered from there.

Practise, practise practice. Oh, and did I say practise?

When practising questions:

Make sure to practise a block of questions that are all the same type. This will allow you to learn how to identify the question type quicker and also gives you a sign to stop so you don’t spend all day working on these questions because you’re stressed 😪.

1. Attempt the question

2. Mark the question

3. If you got it wrong, try and figure out why yourself - write this in a different colour.

4. Check the markscheme or talk-through (if there is one) and add in anything you may have missed or anything that could be helpful for the next question in another colour. Now you’ve differentiated between what you could figure out and what you couldn’t.

5. Attempt the next question

*This may seem tedious because why would you not mark all the questions at the end? Doing it this way ensures you approach each question with a better idea of what to do and allows you to pick up on nuances that you may not have otherwise realised. Also, you don’t want to instil the “wrong” method or idea because of muscle-memory.*

6. Once you finish your block of questions, make note of something that went well, something that could’ve been better and what to do for next time. I’d advise you to keep this in a table so that you can see your progress over time. Make sure to look at this before you attempt this style of question again.

Okay so now we now how to practise a block of questions, do we do them to time or not.

I’d recommend doing them not to time at first.

This will allow you to focus on mastering your process and approach to each type of question. You should continue to do this (if you have enough time) until:

You’ve perfected your process/approach

You’ve ensured your strategy actually helps YOU get the right answer

Once you know the strategy works, you’ll feel more confident in the exam, especially because you know if you blank, you have something to fall back on.

I say ‘YOU’ because whilst a strategy straight out of a textbook may work fine for someone else, it may not be the best way for you. Don’t be afraid to tweak it to fit you or create a whole new strategy altogether!

Now, if your strategy works, move onto the next stage. If not, let’s troubleshoot your strategy.

Troubleshooting your process:

1. Find patterns: are there a particular nuances you’re always missing or mistakes you’re making?

For example, in the TSA being able to differentiate between premises and conclusions is really important. If I find that this is something I can’t do, I’ve discovered a pattern.

2. Practise on easier questions.

With the example above, I may look up arguments for GCSE RS or psychology students and try and identify premises and clauses.

3. Adjust your strategy as is necessary

You may realise that you should another step to your strategy, such as highlighting key words, after practising on easier questions

Right, so you have your strategy down - now what?

Practise to time.

It’s the timing that’s the stickler for many uni entrance exams and the best way to get that down is to practise doing the questions to time. I’d still recommend doing the questions in their question blocks at this stage or mixing up blocks that are similar in question type.

Step 4: Practice tests

Now you know what to do when you see all the types of questions, it’s time to apply what you’ve learnt to a real paper. This is where you see what has stuck and what hasn’t so it’s important to see this is a learning process - don’t expect to get 100% on your first try.

When completing a practice test:

1. Answer the entire test

Since you’ve got your processes down, it’s not necessary to mark each question individually since it’s so time-consuming.

2. Go through and mark the test

3. Try and work out where you went wrong, do this in a different colour.

4. Go through the mark scheme and add further corrections in a different colour.

5. Make a note of your mark, what went well, what could’ve been better (even better if ...) and what to do for next time in a tracker. Look at this before you next do a practice exam.

6. If you find you’re getting a particular type of question wrong every time, go back to those question blocks and master your strategy again.

As I said earlier, these tests are not designed for really high marks and so even after lots of practise, there’ll probably still be things that aren’t quite right. But if:

You’re getting the scores you want/need

You have your strategy for each question type down

Then congratulations - you are officially ready for the exam 🎉.

Whilst I wouldn’t advise all practise to stop, I do think that at this stage, running through loads more exam papers is a bit redundant. Maybe doing one every week or fortnight will suffice. Plus, if you started preparing early, you don’t want to go through alllll your practice papers before the exam actually comes around.

Phase 2 - Lead Up to the Exam

Congrats - you made it!

Honestly, I think if you’ve prepared properly then doing hardcore practise isn’t necessary and might burn you out in the lead up to the exam. If you take away anything from this really long post make it this:

Consistent practise always wins. Always.

If you’ve been consistently practising, there’s no need to cram too much last minute revision. I will say though that looking over your practice test tracker the night before the exam may be helpful as a last-minute reminder but, of course, if this is just going to stress you out further, don’t do it.

Last-Minute Tips

Don’t make this your whole life - It’s summer! There are so many more actually fun things you could be doing. Even practising a couple of times a week at first is absolutely fine.

Ask from advice from the experts - If there’s anything in particular that you’re worried about, ask someone who’s done or is practising for the test or email the university - they might be able to give you one of their students details so you can ask them directly.

Well, that’s all I’ve got for you ...

I hope this was helpful! Feel free to add your own tips and if you have any questions or feedback, just ask me or message me - my DMs are always open. Of course, you could just leave a note on here but if you want to be a little fancy, hit me up!

Alsoooo, let me know if you want me to a) do this for essay-based entrance exams and/or b) turn this into a mini-series and apply these steps to different tests like the TSA, LNAT, BMAT, UKCAT, STEP etc. Then all the resources will be in one place. Obviously, I’m not preparing for all of them (doctor who? definitely not me 🤧) but I have some friends doing some of these exams so I can get some extra exclusive tips from them.

Now, carrying on with QOTD:

QOTD: How do you get over exam nerves?

For me, acknowledging that I’m nervous before the exam and that it’s okay before I distract myself makes me feel much calmer. In an actual exam, I usually cover my ears and try and focus on what I’m reading to get out of my head 😅.

PS: This is my first informative post - please don’t judge 🙈! And if you’ve found it helpful, please reblog so that others can see these tips too ☺️.

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mexcraziness-art · 4 years

Photo

Naruto OC: Saisari Haruno

Me: I'm just going to quickly throw up a ref of my MoriSaku kid for fun Also me: *Spends the entire week on it*

Name: Saisari Haruno

Birthdate: September 25th (Libra)

Gender: Male

Age: 13

Height: 150 cm

Weight: 42 kg

Blood Type: A

Affiliation: Konohagakure

Rank: Genin

Nature Type:

- Earth Release

Parents:

- Sakura Haruno

- Morio Haruno

I don’t actually have a really worked out background or personality for him yet, so the next sections are just pretty much gonna be me spewing fun facts and headcanons about Morisaku and Saisari.

Also bear with me, I haven’t actually re-watched every episode of Shippuden yet, and my memories are foggy.

Background:

In an alternate universe where everyone gets the good things they deserve, after Sakura initially rejected Morio they still met up in the medical tents occasionally, Morio offering to help out with whatever he could while he was still out of commission. From that they started to meet and chat on their breaks, and Sakura actually grew rather fond of him. She ended up finding his letter that he gave her before and this time she actually read it. (I have never seen a love letter in my life, one day I’ll think of something of what it could have said IDK) Anyways long story short, she was so touched by it she actually agreed to go on a date with him once the war was over.

After the war they haven’t seen eachother for a while but they stayed in contact through letters and eventually Morio came to Konoha and they started dating.

They married and Sakura got pregnant with Saisari soon after the events of The Last movie, Saisari was born on September 25th.

Growing up he learnt Earth Release from Morio, who in the meanwhile retired from the shinobi life and became a house husband, and chakra control and taijutsu from Sakura, even though he could never reach the refined levels she had at his age.

During the events of Boruto, he’ll probably take Sarada’s place on the New Team 7, also because in this world Sarada would probably be Karin and Sasuke’s daughter, but that’s a different topic.

Personality:

As far as his personality goes he took mostly after his father, Morio, he’s generally soft, sweet and kind, he’s also easily embarassed, some might even say he’s timid or shy at times. He’s also very helpful towards everyone. He can also be a smartass at times, he’s pretty book-smart and he likes showing-off with his knowledge and fun-facts. On the flip-side sometimes he’s judgemental when someone doesn’t know something he considers basic knowledge, or behaves in a way that’s strange to him. Having inherited both the Will of Fire and the Will of Stone, he’s also incredibly stubborn once he sets his mind on something, and he deeply cherishes his friends, these two things combined make him a real challenge on the battlefield, and also make him a protective and loyal friend.

Relationships:

Sakura:

Saisari greatly admires his Mother and looks up to her in essentially every aspect. The work she does at the Hospital, her medical ninja abilities, her strength, her accomplishments during the war, he wishes to one day grow up to be a shinobi of her caliber. He only wishes she’d have little less of a short temper during their training sessions, she’s not as ruthless as Tsunade used to be with her, but Saisari is much softer than she was and it’s stressing him out a lot.

Morio:

He’s generally on the same wavelength with his Father about nearly everything. He tends to emotionally confide in him and talk about his problems more, because he feels less of an urge to impress him than he does with Sakura. He also loves to listen to his Father talk about Iwagakure and learn more about his home and costumes. One of his favourite pastimes is practing Earth Release with him.

(As for the others… not gonna lie, I’ve seen the first few episodes of Boruto and the Movie a while back, but I have no idea what most of the charachters are like, so I’m going to only list the most notable ones I have some slight ideas for.)

Boruto:

So far I think Saisari would be pretty good friends with Boruto, since they were little they used to hang out a lot due to their parents. After Naruto became Hokage and Boruto started misbehaving he’d occasionally get dragged along but he’d try to avoid trouble as much as he can, in fear of Sakura having his head.

Mitsuki:

I have no idea honestly, I think he’d initially find him wierd, but he’d grow rather fond of him as he gets to know him. They’d probably even get along great eventually.

Sumire: Saisari really looks up to her for how she turned her life around after everything she’d been through. He also greatly admires her for her skills and intelligence. He also has the biggest crush imaginable on her.

Abilities:

His skill levels are generally on an average level. He’s not particularly good at Genjutsu, he has absolutely no skills for medical ninjutsu, his strategy skills aren’t outstanding and he isn’t really skilled for leadership. His only outstanding abilities are his Chakra Enchanced Taijutsu and Earth Release that his parents personally train him in.

Taijutsu:

He’s very skilled in close and hand-to-hand combat. Sakura tried to teach him medical ninjutsu, but he totally failed at that, his chakra control not being refined enough. However it was good enough that she taught him how to use Chakra Enhanced Strentgh by concentrating chakra in various parts of his body. However due to his only-slighty-above-average chakra control, this is very taxing on him, and exhausts him quickly.

Ninjutsu:

He can perform all the basic jutsu Genin are capable of, like the Clone Jutsu and Substitution Jutsu.

Earth Release:

Morio’s been teaching Saisari various Earth Release tecniques since he was about 10 years old. By the time he’s 13 he has an outstanding array of Earth Release Jutsus at his disposal. He’s very proud of his Earth Release abilities, as he feels it’s part of his heritage, always working hard to improve and learn new techniques. Where his general skill sets are lacking, he makes up for it with his Earth Release techniques. Some say he’s well on his way to becomming an Earth Release specialist.

By the age of 13 he’s able to use the following Earth Release jutsus:

- Earth Release: Earth Spear: The latest Earth Release jutsu Saisari has learnt, and so far the only one that wasn’t taught to him by Morio. He came across it himself when he was studying about Earth Release jutsus for the Chunnin Exams, and together with Sakura’s chakra training he learnt it all by himself. As of right now it leaves a lot to be desired and it leaves him greatly exhausted but it has the potential to be his strongest jutsu one day.

- Earth Release: Underground Split

- Earth Release: Tunnelling Technique

- Earth Release: Tearing Earth Turning Palm

- Earth Release: Shadow Clone

- Earth Release: Rock Trail

- Earth Release: Earth-Style Wall

- Earth Release: Rock Shelter

- Earth Release: Rock Gun Technique

- Earth Release: Reverse Antlion

- Earth Release: Hiding in Rock Technique

- Earth Release: Earth Wave Technique

- Earth Release: Double Suicide Decapitation Technique

Other skills:

He’s very creative with paper bombs and other explosives. His favourite type of offense is combining his Earth Spear jutsu with a bunch of paper bombs. He jumps amongst the enemy, hardens his skin to withstand the explosion and sets of the bombs right there.

Weaknesses:

His greatest weaknesses are his average chakra levels and imperfect chakra control. He may be slightly-above-average, but his techniques are very chakra taxing, and they leave him very exhausted very fast. His strategy skills are also lacking, when left to his own devices he tends to become much more rash and get ahead of himself, which usually ends up with him chakra exhausted and vulnerable.

I wanted to finish this in 2 days, I have so many other things to draw, I hate how I just can't get faster, BUT I'm pretty happy with how he turned out, so there's that.

Art b @mexcraziness-art

Naruto belongs to Masashi Kishimoto

#Naruto #Naruto OC #Naruto Fankid #MoriSaku #Sakura Haruno #Good Things AU #reference sheet #Morio Haruno #Saisari Haruno

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thatcresentmoon · 4 years

Text

bullet journal spread masterpost

Over 250+ spread ideas!🎊

hoping your dreams are fulfilled, your grades are awesome and your skin is glowing in 2019! (and 2020)

my tips for bullet journalling

Year in Review

highlights / reflection

achievements this year

lessons learnt / growth as a person

things you want to improve on

advice you’ve received / given

best music/movies/tv shows/etc of the past year

friends made during this past year

commonplace journal pages

things you’ve discovered during the past year

useful tips during the past year

odd facts and trivia during the past year

topics to explore during the past year

questions to ask during the past year

New Year, New You

calendar / future log / yearly or monthly logs

things to look forward to this year

upcoming books/music/movies/tv shows being released this year

maslow’s hierarchy of needs self-reflection spread

goals / new year’s resolutions + steps to put it into action

skills you want to learn this year e.g. coding

habits you want to break / habits you want to pick up

diary: day-to-day happenings

budgets: monthly/yearly budgets

inspiration spread for new projects

level 10 life: rate areas (academic, personal, mental, physical, spiritual, social, financial) of your life out of 10, and write down goals to improve that rating!

monthly overviews (e.g. progress on goals)

assignment due dates calendar

18 things to do by the end of 2018

Special Pages for Special Friends

memories / moments they were there for you

how you met

moments you want to share in the future

their mbti/hogwarts house

their best qualities

Trackers/Logs/______ of the Day

gratitude journal - # things you’re grateful for every day

habit trackers

motivational quotes

news headlines / this day in history

daily affirmations

currently reading / watching / listening to / feeling / eating / wanting etc.

time usage (read: wastage) tracker

k-drama or tv show episode tracker (always forget what ep I’m up to :S)

expenses tracker / tax deductibles

dream diary (tracker, plot(?), lucid or not, dream meanings)

new album or song releases

photo diary / sketch diary

weather

follower milestones

social media post tracker

household duties/chores tracker

grades tracker

year in pixels

TIL (today I learned)

civics

appointments: dentist, optometrist, doctor, therapist, etc.

bills: car / internet / rent etc

tax: income statements and work expenses receipts

membership/licence renewals

health

weight tracker

resting heart rate tracker (gives general idea of cardio fitness)

water intake tracker sleep log / time to bed / time awake / total hours slept

exercise log: number of reps / steps / minutes

mood trackers

period tracker

Various Creative Spread Ideas

day-to-day / life planning spreads

skincare routines

perfect/ideal morning routine

self-care reminders

exercise routines

wishlist

bucket list

firsts: kiss, date, house, vacation, car, concert, etc.

DIYs to attempt

savings jar (doodle it!)

yearly / monthly recurring tasks

usernames/passwords (hints only for security!)

5 or 10 year plans

dream job

dream house

planning for moving houses

dream wedding / planning

date ideas

make a worse case scenarios primer

summary tutorials for your reference e.g. step-by-step tax returns

academic

studyblr ideas

topics I need to revise

finals study timetable/plan

aspirations: what you want to be and why / how to get there

class timetable

assignment ideas

project schedules / team meeting dates

professors’ emails/office hours

assessment results

anti-procrastination page

motivations to study

skills you want to learn or are useful e.g. coding

formulas page

courses you want to take and their pre-reqs

college comparisons

back to school shopping list

textbook list with prices

language learning

vocabulary lists

grammar structures

media (books/tv shows/movies) to consume in that language

self-reflection / personality traits

best and worst characteristics

what to be mindful of / what you need to work on

mbti types you’re most compatible with

fears and how you want to overcome them

letters to your future self (include hopes and dreams)

letters to your past self (include achievements and things to be proud of!)

inspirational people

stress management tips

charities to donate to and why you support them

volunteering activities

fun, cute, and aesthetic spread ideas

things worth staying alive for / getting out of bed for

a spread with all the things you were worried about which turned out fine

message page from your friends to you

“i can’t live without ______”

creative crafts spread: tips / equipment / tutorials

aesthetic colour moodboards

happy / comforting / relaxing / funny things spread

seasons (summer/autumn/winter/spring) spread

rainy day spread

holidays spreads: christmas / easter / halloween / thanksgiving

idioms and proverbs from all different cultures

flowers spread: fav flowers, meanings, bouquet/arrangements, press ‘em!

crystals spread: fav gemstones (doodle ‘em), meanings

succulents spread: fav succulents, terrarium layout ideas

coffee/tea spread: paint with coffee / fav blends / best cafes

what’s in my bag (doodle it!)

outfit ideas / polyvore style collections

magazine clippings

shower thoughts / hypothetical ideas spread

draw my life spread / personal timeline

favourite characters e.g. gudetama, kumamon, etc. (doodle ‘em!)

interesting words list (ephemeral, mellifluous, serendipity, scintillating etc)

ideal date ideas

wedding anniversary ideas (like 1st is paper, 25th silver, 30th pearl, 40th ruby, 50th gold, 60th diamond)

baby animals spread (duckies, puppies, bunnies!!)

#just bullet journal things

bujo spread layouts and devices to try out (e.g. chronodex, parallel time ladder)

key/legend (keep it simple!)

colour palettes/swatches

washi tape / pens / markers swatches

banners / fonts

doodles

ticket stubs / receipts

stickers / stamps

cutouts of info brochures

pressed flowers

calligraphy / brush lettering / handwriting practice

favourite stationery

activities

_______ that you want to do* / have done* (kind of bucket list) *watch, read, listen to, try, taste, cook, play etc.

books

movies

tv shows

music

hobbies

arts/crafts e.g. paper quilling

sports e.g. archery

how to play / equipment / etc.

video games

foods

activities

board games

books / movies / tv shows

best descriptive passages

best cinematography

best action scenes

best use of soundtracks

(basically moments that make it deserving of awards)

music

album reviews

favourite songs

playlists for every mood and all seasons

meaningful lyrics

songs you shazamed

favourite genres and exemplar songs

kpop

reasons why i love my bias / bias wrecker / group

letter to your bias

comeback concepts / favourite outfits

visual/picture tutorials for makeup styles

calendar of your favs’ schedules during comeback season

in-jokes/memes

awards / achievements / records broken / milestones

translated lyrics

kpop songs vocab lists

upcoming releases

on this day

art

pics of your favourite artworks/artists + write about it

art styles you want to emulate

explain techniques for different media e.g. watercolour wet-on-wet

doodle ideas

astrology

natal chart readings/aspects/placements

solar return reading for the incoming year / transits

synastry / compatibility chart readings

constellation/star charts

symbol reference page for planets, zodiac signs, aspects

food

recipes

meal plans

shopping lists

interesting foods: (doodle ‘em!) taste / texture / smell (e.g. truffles, caviar)

cafes/restaurants you want to go to + their specialty dish (photo)

cocktails you want to mix/taste (doodle ‘em!)

media

interesting articles + moral/ethical issues it prompted you to think about

controversial topics on the news and for/against arguments/your thoughts

on this day in history

fav websites / blogs

jokes / puns / pickup lines

favourite poems / quotes / short stories

kinaesthetic

burn book - write things that make you angry/sad and rip the page out

wreck it journal - e.g. colour, scribble, stickers all over this page

travel

places to visit

travel itinerary

cultural parables

useful phrases in the language and their meaning

travel memories spread: things you did / places you went / selfies

postcard collection

packing list

friendly and not-so-friendly people that you met in foreign lands

writing

short story ideas

plot brainstorming spreads

journal prompts

drabbles

character designs

foreign words which can’t be directly translated into english

#bujo #bullet journal #bulletjournal #masterpost #i should go do that thing

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stellaa-r · 4 years

Text

a reflection

Somehow we are at the end of semester one, and therefore the end of this Comm Design Studies class, which I am having trouble coming to terms with given it doesn’t feel like we’ve really had much of a ‘proper’ uni experience! The shift to online learning was hard and testing at times (family and internet interruptions, sore eyes from looking at my screen all day and so. much. coffee I think I now may be immune) I’m pretty proud I was able to get through my first semester of uni, given the craziness of the world in the last few months.

I’ve really loved this class, it was such a great mix of all of the different things I’m interested in, being history, design and writing. These are all things I’d love to combine in my work or at a job one day, so this subject really excited me.

Andy and Karen’s lectures were interesting and inspiring and l learnt so much from them. The beginnings of type, The Bauhaus and post-modernism lectures were a few of my favourites. With the way things were discussed in the lectures, and this reflective Tumblr blog I feel as though now, when I see a design of any kind, I’m able to analyse, question and think about it. About it’s influences, its effect on the world and how or why the design had been created, almost like I would analyse a piece of writing. These are skills I am so glad I now have in my arsenal, as I think it’s improved my personal style and how I design.

The practical classes with Bailey were a great opportunity to discuss the theory of the lectures, collaborate (somewhat!) with people in the class and do some fun activities. Although I wish I was able to do all this in a real life class, I think I was still able to get a bit more confident with sharing my work in class, getting feedback on it, and then responding to it.

I’d never made a zine before, so the ‘Ask Me Anything’ assignment was really exciting. I’m still getting used to having freedom within projects and being able to control a lot of the work I do, so I found it a little difficult to ‘get going’ with this assignment. Once I had, I had so much fun learning about the subject of my zine and then channelling this into my design.

In reflection, I do feel a bit sad about the in-class trivialities we missed out on this semester, but really did enjoy the class nonetheless and feel as though I have come a long way in my design style and skills as a result!

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jakedauschadigitalarts · 4 years

Text

Evaluation of units 1 – 4.

Unit 1 -Introduction to materials, processes and technical skills in art and design:

Through the project ‘All System’s Go’ we were introduced to various materials and processes some of these processes and materials were digital and some were practical processes, at the beginning of the course we were introduced into Adobe Photoshop and Adobe Illustrator with these two materials we learnt various processes and tools most of these processes and tools were simplistic but would later be used in more complex situations to create better outcomes, these tools were crucial to learn for the development of our work throughout the project. Adobe photoshop and illustrator weren’t the materials we used to create outcomes we also touched up on more practical and hands on processes such as Mono printing and carbon paper printing these practical processes were also important for the development of our skills as it allowed us to have a wider knowledge on different processes and skills. Other skills we learnt were important for experimentation, experimentation was important as it allowed us to use our knowledge of the processes we had been learning and allowed us to create more detailed and professional work. Including Adobe Photoshop, Illustrator, Mono printing and Carbon paper copying we also looked at Collaging in Photoshop to create architectural Risographs along with hand bases studio collaging where we created collages based on our research from Hannah Hock and Terry Gilliam, research was an important process and skill along with referencing and evidence our work as it allowed us to learn from our experimentation and our unsuccessful outcomes, we continued to learn processes in Photoshop and illustrator along with our studio work building up to create one of our final outcomes, the final outcome we were working on would showcase and evidence most of our best work this outcome was a Zine booklet and to create it we had a set criteria of only using a simple double colour pallet along with monochrome this was created in Adobe InDesign which was another tool we had to use.

We created a large variety of outcomes using different processes and techniques some of these outcomes hadn’t met my personal criteria or the standard of work I would have liked but I used them as learning points for later outcomes and evidenced them, one of the processes I hadn’t originally like or that I found hadn’t met my personal standards was the Mono printing and Carbon copying processes and outcomes although I thought they weren’t my best work I later used them to create the Vintage postcards which I thought had been one of my outstanding pieces through the project these had later been put onto my zine which is one of the main final outcomes. another outcome we created that I both liked and thought was a good example of the skills I learnt throughout the workshops and lessons was the 80’s Memphis pattern outcomes I personally think these were my best pieces and would like to continue working within the 80s theme, another theme I enjoyed was grunge we briefly touched up on this when we were researching David Carson and creating collages linking to his outcomes.

Within the first project, ‘All System’s Go’ we looked at and experimented with various processes one of the main processes we used at the beginning of the project that we continued through was Typography I used this in various pieces of my work, we started to learn this technique through creating an A – Z in Adobe Illustrator and developing it further within Adobe Photoshop, I took this process onboard and put it within various pieces of my work such as my zine where I used it for my front page and used it to highlight various sections within an outcome along with using it within my Vinyl Album cover outcomes, the typography techniques I learnt I adapted to various outcomes. another process we looked at that I decided to use within my own personal work was the polygonal workshop where we looked at polygonal shapes and experimented with animals, I enjoyed this process so much that I decided to experiment on it within my own time looking at the size differences of the polygonal animals. Nine out of ten of the techniques and processes I learnt I had decided to use within other outcomes to help develop them and create more complex outcomes. Throughout the project and the act of learning the processes there was various processes that I enjoyed doing some of these processes included the polygonal animal outcome and process, Architectural Collages and Risographs, Memphis patterns and the mock-ups, Album covers along with my stickers and final zine.

Unit 2-Introduction to contextual research in art and design:

Throughout the unit and the project, ‘All System’s Go’ we had been given a lot of contextual research that helped shape and develop our work some of this contextual research was through self-study and independent research on the styles themes and processes, this research and context produced through self-study and provided through Demos helped shape and impact my work heavily as without this contextual research I wouldn’t understand nor would I know how to do certain processes to produce my artwork and final outcomes, the contextual research was one of the most important things for my project.

Research within the project and for each new workshop was critical for the improvement and development of my work and my ideas as without this research I wouldn’t have new processes or ideas some of the most critical research I had looked at was done by self-study and my own research along with Demos and artist names provided for example of this would be the research done for the Memphis patterns and Mock-ups we were tasked to look at various 80s inspired Memphis patterns through this research I had developed many ideas and techniques I wanted to try this research helped me then do further contextual research for processes which I then used to make my 80s Memphis patterns unique and interesting and to a level I thought was perfect. Research for each outcome and each experiment was important as without it I wouldn’t have the in-depth understanding about the work I enjoyed looking at a variety of artist for research one artist I found particularly interesting was Hattie Stewart here work is fun and playful using bright colours that pop out creating really Pop art inspired pieces although I didn’t take a lot of here design choices onto my own work I enjoy and respect her work another artist that I ended up liking was Lynette Jackson this was due to her unique style within Architecture and digital collage using bold colours and empty space to make here work pop.

Although research was vital and important for understanding processes and the techniques, we used I hadn’t always taken references or the style of the artist due to this my work would sometimes differ from the artist research or in contrast would be quite similar.

Unit 3-Introduction to drawing skills:

With Sam we learnt an array of drawing techniques and tips, we learnt these processes starting of simple and working to more complex things an example of this would be how we started with simple kawaii faces, kawaii meaning cute in Japanese then building it up working on full faces learning proportion and how to section the face for drawing we also learnt about body proportion and different body shapes learning the basics, after we had learnt these processes we were tasked with practicing them and using what we learnt to create sketches and pieces.

For the next project as we will be developing our drawing skills, I would like to learn more on stylised anatomy and how to take the skills from learning that and making it more stylised, in conjunction with this I would also like to learn more with shading and detailing within character design.

Unit 4-Introduction to communication skills in art and design:

In and throughout our project we had to communicate our processes and our work and the steps we took to create our final outcomes to do this we used various resources at our disposal one of the things we used to evidence and communicate our work was Tumblr on Tumblr we created blog posts, posting our final outcomes along with screenshots of the processes including written step by steps along with contextual research to go along with this looking at artists, processes and techniques for nearly every outcome there was a post referencing an artists or a piece of research including the process along with a comparison of my work. To show what we did we used various things one being Tumblr but we used other methods such as one to one discussion with teachers and peers on improving and developing our work. Although advice was good to listen to it didn’t always have to be taken as in the end its our own work and its tailored to us and our style, two other very important things we did to communicate our work and processes is to write this 1000 word evaluation along with a portfolio with an array of work selection our best pieces for it.

Thought the project I blogged and referenced my work on Tumblr although I managed to do this with most of the outcomes and experiments and research I feel like I could have done more to update and keep on top of these blogs providing further detail and refined blogs this has been a learning curve for me as blogging and referencing my work is a new concept although I didn’t complete my blogs to the best standard I believe I did a really good job referencing my work and making sure there was something showing what I had done even if it was a WIP or a DRAFT.

I feel like I created well developed outcomes final outcomes I personally feel like I exhausted my opportunities to perfect my work and put it at a standard I like and is nearly professional.

Although I haven’t fully pieced together my portfolio, I feel like I have exceptional work that would fir my portfolio, I also believe my work portrays my skill and shows what I have learnt and how I can adapt and develop my process around what I’m working with. I am proud of my work and I can’t wait to develop it and learn more techniques that will help me grow as a student and an artist.

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writing-in-verse · 5 years

Text

The Bird and The Bees (and The Blackthorns) Part Three

Part three of my collaboration with @ti-bae-rius! you can read Part One and Part Two here! Click here for Lauryn’s Headcanon list! The master-list should be linked here too once everything is up.

Enjoy!

Kit was hiding. At least, that was the unofficial reason he was in the library and not in his room or wandering the halls of the Institute where he could be found by Julian or Emma. It had been a few days since Magnus and Alec’s wedding on the beach in front of the Institute, an event which had caused murmuring among the Blackthorns about Julian and Emma’s late-night display of affection. These murmurs and mutters had prompted Julian to hesitantly propose that his younger siblings should learn ‘the facts of life’, something Kit was not keen to hear about from Julian Blackthorn of all people.

He was first ambushed by Emma the day after the wedding in the armoury when he was with Dru, teaching her how to effectively pickpocket. Kit was wearing a jacket adorned with bells secured by safety pins and Dru was repeatedly putting her hand in the side pocket, trying to get the Herondale ring that was placed inside without disturbing any of the bells. A slight cough from behind them had Kit and Dru both jumping, the coat’s chime echoing off the walls.

“You two look like you’re having fun,” Emma remarked with a devilish smirk that indicated she’d been watching for more than a few minutes.

“Training,” Kit replied, his composure brought under control and honed into a confident swagger as fast as it was ruffled. His knack for this was a Herondale trait, or so he’d been told. He turned to Dru. “For all your Shadowhunter talk about style and grace, you really struggle to pick pockets.”

“Really, Christopher?” Dru glared at him while using his full name, a privilege she’d claimed for herself. Kit just shrugged back and gave her a wink.

In fact, Dru had been pretty successful in picking up this skill like she did any other Kit had taught her; managing to look inconspicuous without a glamour, following a target in a busy crowd (that had been an interesting day out), and the ever-popular class of ‘how to lie convincingly’. Her being a Shadowhunter had made many of these skills second-nature for Dru, but it was clear she trained in fighting demons, not dealing with people.

“Well,” Emma said, suddenly a lot more uncomfortable than she was five seconds prior. Body language, that was another important lesson, something more politically experienced Shadowhunters picked up. But demons didn’t really have complex body language, just different levels of murder. “Seen as you’re in the educational mood, Julian wants to start teaching you all about…getting older.”

“Are you going to tell us that we’re definitely going to stop growing, because I have only just gotten comfortable with the idea and do not want anyone to put that much personal therapy in turmoil,” Dru said, hiding her confusion behind humour.

“Oh no.” Kit had gone white, then started to go red and began to slowly make his away to the door. “I should get going, this sounds like a family thing…and I’m sure Dru doesn’t…I’ll just see myself out.”

“Not so fast, Herondale. I think it might be best if you were here for this.” Emma gave him a knowing smile, and Kit wondered if he should tell her it was another Blackthorn sibling he was pining after.

He started to laugh and gave Dru a look that told her everything she needed to know about what Emma thought. It was this aspect of having a close friend, communicating through expression and looks alone, that still delighted Kit and he thought he was putting it to fantastic use. Before Dru could succinctly tell Emma just how hilariously off-base she was, Emma continued.

“Look, you’re growing up Dru, and it’s normal for boys to start giving you some extra attention. Even more so when your body starts to…change.” Emma was trying to be as tactful as she could and waited for any reaction from Dru. She wasn’t expecting the one she got.

No amount of training in composure could have stopped Dru from bursting out laughing, vaguely gesturing to her chest and continuing to laugh for a solid minute. Eventually, she regained her composure and headed towards the door, Kit on her heels, taking the opportunity to make his own escape.

“Oh, by the way,” Dru said, turning to Emma before leaving the training room. “Kit’s a pretty good-looking guy - I mean he’s a Herondale; it’s practically cheating - but he is really not my type. No offence, Kit.”

“None taken,” Kit replied, smirking at her. He thought a lot of Dru, knew she would make someone very happy one day, but he had eyes for only one black-haired boy and, even if he hadn’t told her about Ty, he had a feeling she knew and that when he was ready to tell her she’d support him wholeheartedly.

That was about half a day ago, give or take; Kit hadn’t brought his phone to the library with him and he’d practically lived here since Emma had attempted to teach him about his friend’s anatomy. Dru knew where he was, and he’d asked her to tell Ty in case the other boy needed him. She knew her brother had spent almost every night in Kit’s room, that it had become his routine, so she understood Kit’s request. Well, she understood an aspect of it; she didn’t understand that Kit wanted to see Ty more than anyone but so far, he hadn’t come looking.

Kit was using the time to do some research, learning as much about practical Shadowhunter skills as he could, which he’d started by learning runes. Scanning the contents page of an old bound green book, he suddenly noticed there was a note on the inside page warning to only study one rune at a time that seemed quite serious. He decided to start working on the rune for fire. This was partly because Kit was fifteen and setting fire to things sounded fun, but also because he’d heard of fire messages and wanted to learn how to send them to people – Ty being at the top of that list.

He’d just gotten comfortable drawing the rune with some confidence and was about to send something to Dru (he both found the idea of sending her a message like this funny and wanted to show her he was learning her life as much as she was his) when he heard the door opening. He dived down a space between two shelves and crouched low, hoping no one would bother to look too hard.

“Dru?”

“Livvy?” Kit walked out of his hiding spot. “Dru isn’t here, I haven’t seen her since early today when we were ambushed by Emma.”

“I’ve been wanting to talk to her one-on-one, but I’ve barely seen her.” Livvy looked disheartened, and Kit wondered what the matter was but didn’t want to push. “What are you doing in here? Is that the Gray Book?”

“It is, in fact, a green book. I didn’t think it had much particular significance, although it does suggest to not read too many runes at once,” Kit shrugged.

“The Book of Gramarye is a book where all the runes are stored for Shadowhunters to learn. You should only read one rune at a time because the mind is pretty fragile, so reading too many runes causes headaches or worse, depending on how many you read.”

“So, not a book to read casually then?”

“That’s probably not wise.” She peered over his shoulder at his notes curiously. “Is that that the fire rune? What would you be learning that rune for?” She looked at him with brows raised.

“I heard you could send messages to people. I thought if I learnt I could send them to you, or Ty, or Dru,” Kit replied in a rare moment of level-headed tenderness. He’d gotten used to the Blackthorns and had allowed himself to trust them in a way he hadn’t trusted anyone else.

“So, you’re hiding from Julian and Emma to learn how to send secret messages to your boyfriend? That’s pretty cute, Kit; didn’t think you had it in you,” Livvy smiled, enjoying the slight jab. “If we were to judge your romantic creativity by our first kiss, I’d say you’re really outdoing yourself.”

“You’re forgetting that you asked to be kissed, and Ty…is Ty my boyfriend? Are we making it that official? It’s not that I don’t like Ty: I do, it just feels like our first kiss wasn’t long ago. It’s also weird to be calling it ‘our first kiss’ don’t you think?” Kit attempted to smirk as he went and sat in his seat, closing the Gray Book, but Livvy could see his shoulders were tense and the humour didn’t meet his eyes.

“Yeah, that is weird. I don’t think I’d want to kiss you again. No offense.”

Kit laughed. “You know, you’re the second Blackthorn girl to tell me that today. It’s starting to wound my pride. You’re right though; I’ve always liked girls, but then Ty comes into my life and I start questioning everything. I want to hide behind jokes and, apparently, library books because I don’t know how to feel.”

“Before you came crashing into our lives, or Ty came crashing into your basement, we didn’t know anyone outside of the Institute. I was always with Ty trying to help him make sense of things that I still didn’t understand myself. You’re fifteen Kit, you have time to work it out, and until then just do what feels right.”

“Can I be honest with you?”

“Of course,” Livvy nodded, sitting down beside him in the little alcove they were tucked in. “What is it?”

“I…I always thought I was straight until I met Ty. When I kissed you, I liked it, but it wasn’t like when I kiss Ty. When Ty and I are together, I feel more complete. Ty is like…an anchor, when I feel overwhelmed. When he started sleeping on my floor I actually slept more soundly than when he wasn’t there, and then the first night he slept in my bed I never felt safer.” Kit was just staring at the floor without really looking at it, instead seeing things only he could. “I remember the first time we kissed,” he continued after a moment. “For the first time, I wasn’t thinking about any of this, I was just thinking of Ty and how much I wanted to be there and nowhere else. Then I began to…register what I was feeling and how it felt…right, but it was so different to anything I felt before. At first, I was terrified I’d made some mistake and I’d hurt Ty trying to explain, then I was scared he was just experimenting on someone safe and it wouldn’t happen again, but it did. I wanted that, I still do, but I don’t know what that makes me. Am I gay? Am I straight? Does it matter? I really like Ty, but what if I hurt him trying to work that out?”

Livvy thought over what Kit had told her and wondered how to respond. Kit and Ty’s relationship was so new that neither were ready for any next steps, and yet Livvy herself had so little experience in how to handle a romantic relationship, she had no idea how to advise someone else’s.

“I guess, you take it all one day at a time. I don’t know what that looks like or how hard it will be, but I’m always here for you Kit for as long as that takes. Also, don’t worry about trying to label yourself, just focus on being happy,” she smiled and got up, glancing once more down at the Gray Book. “I think it’s cute what you’re trying to do, but you need to be more patient when drawing the rune, there’s a certain grace that comes from using a Stele.”

“I’ve seen you guys draw these runes in seconds. I don’t want to ask the demon if he can wait around because I failed art class.”

“You need to slow down. It needs to be accurate to work.” She gestured abstractly with her hands and Kit smirked. “Where did you get the stele from anyway? I didn’t think anyone had the time to give you one let alone teach you how to use it.”

“Julian gave me one, and then Ty replaced it with one of his old ones.”

“Oh,” Livvy replied, eyebrows raised. “Ty never gives his possessions away. He really likes you. You know that, right?”

“I know,” Kit said, looking suddenly serious. “I just hope I don’t let him down.”

“You never could. He doesn’t just go and sleep in anyone else’s room apart from mine, and you’re the first person from outside the family to properly understand him.” She levelled her eyes and held Kit’s stare. “When you’re ready to tell the others about you and Ty, the whole family will support you. Julian’s overbearing at times and Helen will always want to protect us, but you’re a part of the family now and everyone can see how happy you make Ty.”

“Thank you, Livvy,” Kit gave her a warm and affectionate smile.

“It’s cool,” she shrugged. “Now, I’m going to track down Dru. Good luck hiding from the rest of the family. I hear Julian is calling in Magnus and Alec for some queer sex education and let me assure you, Magnus will not let you miss a single lesson if only for his own enjoyment. I also think it might be good for you, if you’re willing.”

“Thanks, Livvy, but I’ll take my chances for now. Good luck finding Dru; I wish I could help but I’ve just been so busy all day.” He gave her a wicked grin. “I’ll see you soon.”

“See you, Kit.”

Livvy turned and left the library, musing over the discussion she’d just had with her brother’s...partner? Boyfriend? This was early days, she told herself, there didn’t need to be labels for any of it. She hoped both of them could work out their insecurities, but the conversation only made her realise her own lack of experience. It was strange; Ty was seemingly growing faster than her, and she felt like life was leaving her behind. With a final sigh Livvy set off to find her sister, hoping they’d be able to work through all this together.

#livvy blackthorn #ty blackthorn #kit herondale #julian blackthorn #emma carstairs #dru blackthorn #tavvy blackthorn #tsc #tda

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