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#to talk to ppl in person who I’m not related to

aroace-genderfluid-snake · 2 years

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God, I’m so fucking tired of romance.

Like seriously! It’s everywhere! And where it’s not? People try to say it is! Like is that all you alloromantics think about? Is it that great that most people, consciously or not, believe they need it to be happy? Is it addictive or something? Why does it belong everywhere? Why is it that the moment there’s any sort of aromantic rep, people are trying to prove that they’re not aromantic? Why is it that, if I explain my ideal relationship to an alloromantic person, they’ll probably just tell me it’s actually romance? Why is my sexuality considered nothing when half of the romantic bullshit out in the world literally has no substance?

Why am I considered less? Because aromantic people are. We’re considered less queer, less lgbt, even by people who aren’t exclusionists. Not only that, but aromantic, along with asexual, is considered to just be a modifier: this is a straight person who doesn’t want sex (never mind that isn’t what asexual means), this is a bi person who isn’t interested in a romantic relationship (again, not what aromantic means), this is a non-binary person, their sexuality is nothing!

Did you know that there’s literally no scientific studies on aromanticism? Did you know that conversion therapy for us is very much still legal in almost every single country? Do you know what it’s like to learn your identity in a community who’s modo is “love is love!” to find out you can’t fall in love? Do you know how fucking dismissive it is when people say “oh, but there’s platonic love! There’s other types! Just because you’re aromantic doesn’t mean you can’t feel love!” when someone so much as comments on aphobia in a post very much directed towards romantic attraction? Not to mention how fucking cruel it is to look at aromanticism like that. Like it’s unfortunate. And how saying we can still feel other types of love isn’t even true to all aromantics.

The first time I heard of asexuality and aromanticism was in an exclusionist’s post. I was on Instagram, which is a fucking cesspool, but I was also 13, so I didn’t know. And you know what happened? I believed it. For the next three years, I believed it! And all I can think, as I look at some of you, is that if exclusionist didn’t include trans people and weren’t terfs, you’d be silently agreeing with them. That you are agreeing with them when it comes to the aspec community. Because I’ve gone down the exclusionist pipeline before, and you guys? Some of you are already in.

#lol it’s 4 am and I’m tired but. idk. i just read something that set me off #it was my own fault. I knew it’d be about romance. but.#but I don’t know. i guess I’m just tired of expecting aphobic comments every time I read anything romance related #what does it matter? most the people who read this will also be aspec. the ones that aren’t are mostly already good allies.#and the rest can go fuck themselves I don’t have the energy for them #I’m tired. so tired. in a way that’ll never go away. or more accurately wont go away until I don’t have to see romance everywhere #and this isn’t abt seeing couples in public or seeing gay ppl talk abt their romantic relationships. it’s really not.#it’s about how if a show had a canonical qpr so many people would see them as a romantic couple. act like they can’t be anything but #it’s about how the few times I’ve posted abt aro hcs ppl have gotten mad at me #it’s about how romance is referred to as something more. fuck y’all for that one. seriously. y’all suck #and yeah it’s been worse and it’s getting better but that doesn’t change the fact that I’m tired #a better future doesnt erase a worse past #but whatever. most people don’t care either way #aro #aromantic #arospec #asexual #aroace #oh yeah the aroace nonbinary person is me and that actually happened ❤️#queer #lgbtqai #aphobia tw #ace #aspec #acespec #happy pride. I’m going to sleep

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comradekatara · 2 months

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i apologized already for making you think about natla yet i am here again. so sorry!

i’m not super active on tumblr anymore so most atla/natla posting i see is on reddit unfortunately, and i posted about this there. i was met with some nuance and some semi-interesting takes on it thankfully, but it’s a change to the show i didn’t like and i still have yet to see anyone criticize it, even ppl (redditors lol) who otherwise very much disliked the show/disliked how it butchered its major themes and beats. i’m not looking for someone to hate on it/agree w my take, i just wanted to hear your take, as this is a) not reddit lol and b) you are an atla-understander

i’ve seen soooooo many people praise the change where they make zuko’s crew the 41st division, and i get why ppl enjoyed it like it was satisfying i guess??? if that’s your thing? but i personally found it at best corny and at worst a cheapening of zuko’s arc as it relates to the fire nations twisted values and sense of honour. like it was futile for zuko to try and save the 41st bc of how fucked up the fn/its leadership is, and everyone but zuko knew that! his arc revolves around (in part) realizing how messed up his country is. ozai assigning them to him for The Lolz instead of them getting unceremoniously sacrificed offscreen anyways despite zuko’s effort – effort which gets him disfigured and banished and is perhaps the major impetus of his whole arc – just is… idk it’s cheaper it’s lowered stakes it’s not understanding zuko’s thematic relationship to his country it’s corny it’s not slaying to me…

lmfao I mean I salute you for attempting to be nuanced about a show that just fully sucks ass. but yes. you basically just said it all. the 41st division storyline (including all the ridiculous flashbacks that editorialize all the wrong details) is really just emblematic of the way the show fails as a whole to convey subtlety, nuance, or thematic depth. they feel the need to make the most obvious decisions possible, while simultaneously making the wrong decision at every single turn. zuko’s crew being young and naive also completely undermines the fact that zuko is supposed to look ridiculous commanding a bunch of old men. he’s supposed to be childish and inept. if jee is only a couple years older than him and respects him as a person, it completely negates the fact that his lieutenant is an experienced, battle-trained soldier a good 40-ish years his senior who has to listen to a spoiled teenager’s impulsive and foolhardy commands. it’s the way iago talks about cassio, not the way cassio talks about othello. so yeah, it not only misunderstands the political implications and dimensions of zuko’s arc by making his sacrifice heroic instead of futile, but it also just completely negates how his character is intentionally portrayed in book 1, especially in contrast to azula, although she’s also wildly butchered here, so like. swagever i guess.

#communistzuko #natla #asks #zuko #sorry for bringing in othello #actually wait no im not #I can’t help being the way that I am!!!!!

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girlreblogger · 2 months

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the annoyance with blk y/n and the stories she’s in is hilarious. her characteristics might be the problem one day or her side characters the next. it legit feels like we may never get to a balanced solution on what to do with our own representation since the wrong ppl always talk about it and create it. we have mean and shallow ppl who take over the conversation, ppl who really self hate but try and cover it up with “i just don’t want her to be a stereotype” and then the ones who probably love and support tyler perry movies.

the bottom line is the ppl who do write those niggafying, toxic (it’s a buzzword but that’s what they are) or smutty fics (not talking abt the actual good ones with a blk reader though 🧎🏽‍♀️) can do wtv they want and owe you nothing. that’s why they get so frustrated. i don’t think all the times those should be crucified for what they write when other groups of ppl (or our own) write all kinds of other crazy shit.

and.. i know a lot of ppl who don’t want to say it but y’all keep bringing up the smut and niggafying as the main problem, but i think it’s some of the ppl writing it and their underlings. it’s just no one wants to say anything.

an excerpt from a draft of mine

“a lot of ppl on here be weirdos or mean asl. so when someone block you don’t be like “oh what i did” “they that mad cause of my (internet—fictional—digital on screen) presence”

like nobody got time to go to your acc and say “i don’t like you” who cares. oddly some miserable ppl do actually but still. the lack of awareness is ridiculous. that’s why ppl don’t f with y’all.”

i was talking abt all of tumblr and every other app but it applies here.

from what i see on here, some are just straight up weird, cliquey, and chiesty (if that’s how you spell it) and that’s why ppl be so mad abt those types of books 💀. we also have to acknowledge the amount of overwhelming & honestly damaging blk yn fics (not to be confused with ppls screwed ideas of stereotypical) there are. i understand why ppl write them for personal reasons but when it comes to our own reflections of ourselves as blk women it’s almost hurtful to read some of the things people put “her” through. i mean even her with a white man that use aave and has cornrows is hurtful.. 😔 (i’m trolling now 💀) naw but fr. i personally don’t like reading blk women just being written for smut or going through crazy situations or kinda like.. i don’t wanna say unfulfilling but like.. idk i can’t think of the word. (edit: ppl write blk yn to be in unfulfilling situations) but girl i can watch a tyler perry movie for all that.

again. ppl write these stories for there own personal reasons, relate to them and enjoy them for those reasons as well. that’s why depending! on what it is i don’t think blk writers should be bombarded with hate like that. also ion think smut should be banned like y’all go to far can we just slow down on it … there are some nice ones out there i promise 🧎🏽‍♀️

but in all seriousness there are many other reasons why i feel toxic and smutty fics are popular for blk yn but i don’t think anyone cares to hear that and the conversion will prolly go back to nigga eren somehow which is crazy cause y’all be arguing over a fictional white man.

oh! 😒 i almost forgot 😒 the ppl who are against “ghetto” y/n to try and advocate for more fluffy or like.. normal (healing) stories and from what i see the ppl who are the most up in arms about it in my personal opinion seem to dislike certain parts of blkness that i appreciate personally and so i just straight up disregard their opinions. y/n doesn’t have to “act” (😒) blk but i see ppl get mad about her protecting her hair….. with a bonnet….

sigh, anyway but yeah we need more soft and sweet fics or just like calming ones? but someone gon have to write it! i don’t like this app or my writing all too much so i gave up a while ago.

just like many other blk writers….

gaspp! we should also do like a fluff challenge or sumn where writers do like fluff … march? girl idk so maybe that will trend and all the ppl who spend time arguing and going back and forth with ppl who write stories they don’t like can like idk look for other writers who write soft, normal, fun stories and reblog them or make a list of them. or maybe like possibly write their own stories too????

everyone says the smut fics gets the most likes and they do. that’s why you keep seeing them. so maybe support or refreakingblog the fics that are comforting to you so others can be as well.

i actually made this page to repost softer fics because i was tired of blocking certain tags so i can avoid heavy smut and subtly abuse fics. also pls leave the ppl who niggafy anime characters alone they will not be stopped. i mean we still have ppl who have been calling chris evans jamal since 2020.. calling him that to this date. married and all.

sigh… 2 more days until blk history month ends. maybe next year we can find a balance between “dramatic” and smutty fics and soft and slice of life ones for blk y/n next year. remember this is tumblr too and the ppl writing aren’t even getting paid for this but it’s for the ppl yk.

ppl who are respectful and reblog tho.

muah

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thatdeadaquarius · 1 year

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Genshin Sagau (?) Isekai Brainrot - Language

I've seen like ONE small kinda related Genshin Sagau/isekai idea for this but I wanted more of it so BAD

It’s not the most interesting thing in the world, it’s about our modern vernacular vs. Teyvat's flowery speech

Pls feel free to expand on or add to this pLEASE TAG ME IF U DO IM STARVING OUT HERE :)))

So I saw someone write like one sentence abt this (can’t remember who :( sorry I’ll update if I find them ) or like a brutally honest version??

But I also took inspo from how fucking wordy and long conversations that are in Genshin, even with ppl like Xiao (the rude boy that he is) or even Tighnari who gets to the point pretty quickly

It goes smth like:

So, all of Teyvet, (esp ppl like Zhongli 💀 u know the ones) talk,, flowery.

Like, the whole Pride and Prejudice style speaking, euphemisms, metaphors, for some characters (or Npcs) its full on POETRY.

Lookin’ at you Kazuha.

And going off of any variation of you being the Creator, (or otherwise an older mythical being?), they could have this thing where the older a deity/mythical thingy is, the simpler the speech.

Kinda makes sense to them y’know? The older beings are serious, commanding, intimidating

And nothing says "I'm ancient as fuck and powerful as fuck" like simple blunt speech.

And being closer to the literal creation of the world, language would understandably be less complex (I’m assuming it’s the same as in human cultures in our world's history)

Like literally look at our fantasy typical stories, plenty of them have a dragon or ancient god that speaks in extremes, like so flowery its a metaphor, or so bluntly its startling (ie, "Be not afraid." "I am all powerful." etc etc)

And so, ancient powerful being = direct/blunt speech

…

...Y'know,, almost like our modern vernacular.

Like, part of some of our modern day comedy is purely based on a sentence being delivered bluntly for impact

Hell our ads and videos and content in general we always want to get to the point, to say things simply

So with this in mind, even if you try to deny being the Creator, they might still think you are, or at least a more minor ancient deity/creature

(like the Seven Sovereigns/Phanes/Shades/etc. for example would sound eerily modern or at least easy for you to understand bc of this trait lol)

(Also I'm just assuming u know Genshin lore enough to know what I meant by that ^)

____

So, I love the AU where you just,, hitch a ride with the traveler like Paimon bc u start at the "beginning of the game",

And with every person you meet, you're like, "Ok, no, I promise this is just how my country/world speaks, it's not like that, I'm not some ancient deity…"

And They're all like 🤨🤨🤨 "Well, fine traveler and companions, why does your speech sound so simplistic and sharp? Surely, you do not expect me to truly believe you.."

You: "Please I just talk like this, I'm a regular human."

Them: "Alright, if it is as you say,, you wish to not experience being "known" yes? Fear not, I will keep your secrets close to my chest."

You: "No, for the last time, that's not-"

And it just keeps happening, lol

(srry I tried my best at emulate Genshin language + flowery speech idk how to do it)

Like maybe you would just sound weird or like a foreigner speaking y’know in simpler sentences bc they don't know the language as well as native speakers, at least that could be how you sound to NPCs and ppl who don’t know abt simpler speech meaning

...But the Adepti? Zhongli?? Barbatos maybe??? Even the Aranara??? Those who are old enough to maybe have heard how older beings speak or at least have knowledge of how they should speak/sound??

You couldn’t have predicted how shocked their faces were the second you opened you’re mouth…

Sumeru scholars would freak tf out i stg, as soon as you meet Haypasia, she's already losing it, first the Irminsul progress, now this ancient being/Creator?? Girlie thinks its a sign lmao

(I’m an Aether lover, and also bc I think Lumine looks badass as Abyss ruler, so I’m gonna go with Aether for traveler sorry Lumine mains love yall T-T)

You, and Aether being equally confused at first pLEASE 😭

lets say he speaks a little more fluffy than you at least, after all I’m assuming bc of the outfit that he’s from a fantasy-like place, and his replies can be a little fluffy like Teyvat’s residents, so he kinda fits in, kinda like everybody assumes he's just from another country when he gets to a new nation (at least that’s what I think happens??)

Like after (maybe Diluc?) Lisa, Kaeya, Venti, and Jean (who I think would all be knowledgeable, thru diff means, about this enough to maybe recognize the simpler speech = ancient god thing)

ALL reacted shocked as hell at hearing you talk, and would probably explain (or Paimon before then?) in that infuriatingly roundabout way, that you would usually skip a couple dialogue boxes just to avoid bc yOU ALREADY GOT THE POINT or alternatively WHATS THE POINT HERE?? JUST SAY IT, WHATS THE COMMISSION/QUEST FOR/WHAT DO I DO??

(Those blue highlights be savin my impatient life, and i actually like lore stuff 💀)

Oh that’s also another frustration. For you.

It would drive me crazy if I had to wait like,, 2-3 minutes for ppl to explain what they ate for dinner or sm shit

Like, now imagine that’s everyone, about everything.

You don’t know how anything gets done in battles or wars, like you need faster communication for that right??💀

Anyway, you, Aether and Paimon decide you just gotta not talk when you first meet people or like,, make sure you're gonna be around that person for a while so you don’t have to possibly get someone over the shock of your speech every time you guys talk to people 😭 that'd be so miserable I can already tell,,

Like at first, every convo ya’ll have had with people who recognize that direct speech trait as a thing, would take at least 10 minutes to finish talking about it/being shocked,,

It got so old so fast.

(Like I already can’t communicate that good with ppl irl bc I misunderstand them, or they do me, or they just dont get what I mean, and as my friends put it, which I think would fit here for any language shenanigans we go thru in Teyvat, "A Shakespearean level of misunderstanding, hilarious but such a downward spiral to watch, it just gets more and more ridiculous as it goes on...")

On another note, making fun of someone would be so fucking funny,

I’d like to give myself the benefit of the doubt that many characters, after getting used to your speech, would generally understand you (even if they always notice it, like an accent) and would actually rlly love hearing insults or even just generally how you would put things

(like maybe treating this almost like those vids of ppl with non-native english speaknig relatives/parents and its the most hilarious thing to watch them, usually get pissed 😭, at their kid, if u dont know what I mean look up on tiktok or smth)

And You just come off like those insults where you dont even use cuss words, you just like, drag queen read them into never showing their face again, and you did it in so few words!!

They're amazed and oh,

you've become the John Mulaney of Teyvat

(Bad examples include:

Fontaine inventor: "...And I shall call my invention, crocks!"

You: "I wouldn't even be cremated in those." )

*Aether crying laughing in the background bc he never knows what you’re gonna say next, and Paimon's jaw dropped so hard

JFC this post is so long sorry, I probably will spam with a Part 2 but let me know if you’re interested in hearing more anyway!!

Thanks for reading this rambling!!

Or send in asks abt this 👀

Cheers,

🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

#genshin sagau ideas #sagau #isekai #genshin god reader #genshin impact #genshin imagines #gender neutral y/n #gender neutral reader #genshin sagau #genshin isekai #going feral #genshin brainrot #genshin au

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survivalove · 4 months

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debunking lies zutara shippers say about the atla creators & writers

disclaimer: this is in no way an endorsement or defense of bryke or anyone mentioned. literally just debunking false statements i see spread throughout and outside the fandom as it pertains to kataang

1. that bryke made kataang endgame because the nice guy should get the girl

this is something I see often usually linked with this video of a man ⬇️ who they claim to be bryan/mike echoing this sentiment.

this man is in fact john o’bryan, one of the three known zk shippers in the writers’ room (we’ll expand on this in point 5) talking about how he saw aang. not the creators. so of course it shouldn’t surprise anyone that he doesn’t even like kataang in the first place.

2. that bryke made kataang endgame last minute and zutara was the original pairing

bryan and mike (notice how i’m using both of their names separately. this too will be important in the next point) have talked about how kataang was planned since they originally wrote the show.

they have also talked ad nauseam in a video (which I will not share here cuz it made a lot of ppl angry) about why they do not like zutara and its shippers, so this entire point is bogus.

++ the reason why they say zk was the original pairing is because of one of the zk writers (joshua hamilton) wrote this in the atla fun facts that used to run on tv. (we’ll get into him later) those atla fun facts contain a lot of inaccurate/non canon “facts” which you can check and verify on avatar wiki if you know what i’m talking about.

3. that aang is bryke’s self insert (specifically mike)

yeah, here’s where the separation becomes important. bryan (L) and mike (R) are two different men. mike has never said that aang was his self-insert, nor has he directly talked about relating to aang. bryan, however, constantly talks about how much he relates to zuko. even, going as far to say he tries to think like zuko when he writes characters and shows.

the only time mike has come close to saying he relates to aang is when dante said he thinks mike is more like aang while bryan is more like zuko, and they, mostly bryan, agreed. (mike has actually said he relates to korra more than aang but hey) bryan also is the one who drew mike’s beard on adult aang because he considered it a nice reference to his friend. this is the main reason why shippers ran with that self-insert narrative because half the time, they think bryke is actually one person ☠️

++ in fact, aang’s original character design is based off the mixed black-chinese son of sifu kisu

4. that atla was supposed to have a season 4 where katara and zuko got together

this is mostly something that has come out of a fabricated interview by the head writer, aaron ehasz. he was allegedly asked what he would have liked to do if given the chance to write a fourth season of the show and talked about an azula redemption arc among other things. zutaras then made up a whole fake interview including that he wanted to make the two characters endgame.

ehasz then came out to say that most of these “interviews” were faked and that he has never talked about having a preference for any ship. if you go on his twitter, you will see him talking about an azula redemption arc tho.

as for atla having a 4th season at all, it was never intended. the creators, the music composers have all said at various points in time, the show was written and pitched as three seasons, three elements.

5. that most of the other writers shipped zutara and bryke’s authoritarianism shut it down

as I said above, only three writers on the original show have come out to say they preferred zk at some point. atla has had a total of 21 staff writers. 3 out of 21 is not most if you ask me.

as for bryke (yes now i’m using the shorthand cuz i proved my point earlier) being authoritarians, no writer or staff that has worked with them on the show has said this so…? idk where that came from but i’m not here to back them up just mention facts.

6. that all the women who worked on the franchise shipped zutara while only men shipped kataang

atla has very few female staff as it is:

5 writers (elizabeth welch: zk; others: unknown)

1 director (unknown)

5 storyboard/character artists (lauren montgomery: ka; elsa garagarza: ka; angela song mueller: zk; others: unknown)

1 comic writer (faith erin hicks: ka)

2 comic artists (gurihiru: ka)

++ mae whitman (katara’s voice actress) has expressed her like for both ships throughout the years.

so i’m not sure what defines all and only for some ppl but those definitions are not in my dictionary. disclaimer: i’m not declaring anyone here as a shipper in any official sense. this is just based off statements they have made that you can google!

7. that katara is written poorly in post-atla content because of kataang/bryke

I mean the first part isn’t really a lie, more of an opinion which I can agree with to an extent.

why I mention this here is because zks will not only go on a tangent and link the misogyny in the writing to a m/f ship and say the other m/f ship would have been more feminist…

but they also refuse to hold all the men involved accountable. like I said, 3 known atla writers shipped zk and 2 of them (joshua & john) were men (who would’ve thought men could like a ship and it could still be considered feminist 😃). they were also 2 out of only 4 atla writers that came back for legend of korra, outside of the creators. (19 to 4 ☠️ no comment). these shippers very well know this and instead of holding these men accountable for the misogynistic writing, they instead brag about them shipping it and ask them about zk whenever they have the chance.

another example is gene luen yang, a comic writer who again shipped zk (another man GASPPPPP) responsible for the first 5 comic books. everyone knows his comics suck in terms of characterization, particularly katara’s. in fact zutaras have made multiple threads on how poor the writing is. funnily enough, they always fail to mention that gly was the script writer or acknowledge his part in this mischaracterization, while bragging about him shipping zk in other posts. ironic.

meanwhile, bryke have never offered writers’ commentary on any of gly’s comics besides the search - mike (because they were mostly writing legend of korra during his run.)

basically these shippers don’t care about misogyny or holding male writers accountable if they ship zk which is funny because I thought it was… for the female gaze? why are you hyping men shipping it anyway? confusion.

#atla #atla fandom problems #anti zutara #antizutara #pro kataang #kataang #if you want me to remove any tag let me know!

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suguruplsr · 6 months

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A rekindled flame

✰ no summary for this one!

જ⁀➴ i kinda wanna make this a series hehee <33 (here’s a fic that’s kinda related!)

,, toji fushiguro x fem reader , modern au w/ a little dark content mentioned (robbing , killing , drugs , gangs , gun [tiny bit]) , reader doesn’t live in a good place & is mentioned to smoke , toji is mentioned to kill ppl , slight angst w/ comfort , they were together in the past , idk what else lmk!

divider @/benkeibear

you lived in a.. not so great area. ran by gangs and drug lords. sure there was a few good things in your little fucked up part of the city, like the old lady at the gas station down the street. she always carries a gun, preferably a shotgun, which you thought was typical at first. but after she saved your life one time, you check up on her whenever you go get your pack of cigarettes. and you’ve baby sat her grandchildren a few times, sweet children.

there’s also the club a few blocks away, lively and filled with people at night who just want to fuck and drink away their problems. something you admit to doing a couple of times, but who wouldn’t? living in a shitty environment while making little money, you can’t help but want to forget it sometimes. but unfortunately, with a mom who doesn’t want anything to do with her ‘mental’ daughter, and a father whose never been in your life, living here was the only thing you could afford. you hope your 30s will be better than this.

but at least you have few other good things in this good for nothing town. nice friends, you know they’re mixed up with the wrong people, but you’re far too deep to actually pull away without possibly getting your house robbed or better yet, killed. however, you hate they’re on good terms with someone like toji fushiguro.

“and whose this one? she’s new.” a looming voice breaks you from your thoughts. looking up from the decorative purse you wore, after fiddling with it for the past hour or so, you met a pair of dark eyes that belonged to the infamous toji fushiguro. he was known for his connections throughout the city, even getting good words in from stinky business men who just needed an extra hand in getting rid of competitors.

“oh that’s name, we kinda dragged her here so don’t mind her.” one of your friends speak for you, a nervous chuckle leaving them as you let out a little sigh in relief. you could use a cig right now, it’s been hours since you guys got here, smoking and talking about a few dealings at toji’s crib. yet, you had to come because of a few sightings of people near your apartment. people your friends definitely don’t want you to end up getting in contact with.

so you try not to mind taking the 3? 4? hour route of having toji’s eyes occasionally stick to your figure until it’s time for your friends to go.

and just as you all are finally heading out, you feel a large hand stops you from getting up. “weren’t gonna speak to me?” and of course dread is pouring into your body from the way one of your friends look at you. as if you knew the man personally, which unfortunately.. “what are you talking about toji?” and you curse the way his name rolls off your lips perfectly, as if you didn’t ghost the man for three months.

as if you still thought about the familiarity of simply being near him.

“oh you know what i’m sayin’.” he tsks, eyes brows furrowed as he peers down at you. rolling his eyes, toji gestures for everyone to leave with a lazy wave of his hand, “i’m takin’ her home.” “uh, no you are not.” you perk up with scoff. this man is so fucking unbelievable. as you try to walk over to the door, you’re stopped by toji who extends his arm across your body, not letting you get pass him.

“well you two clearly got some shit to talk about.. it’s okay name, you can trust him.” you see the way your friends are hurrying to leave, gathering their stuff and swiftly closing the door with a small slam. it’s silent as you process your situation, your friends just left you with a man who could snap your head in two seconds. a man they don’t know you were ‘seeing’ for months until the summer came.

“sit down.” toji mutters, glancing at you before walking away to his kitchen. was this his way of actually giving you a choice? well knowing him, it probably was. and it makes you rethink your actions.

laying on the couch reminds you of the days he’d crawl between your legs, you both napping or talking quietly with an incense lit by the tv stand. usually, it would be burnt out by the time you two would wake up. the scent lasting a bit and mixing with the spring air that flowed through the many windows you’d open around the house.

“you got comfortable quick.” toji’s smug, walking back to you with a bag of chips, handing them to you and you sit up, “well you forced me to stay here..” you grumble, opening the bag as he sits across from you, crossing his legs. mindlessly, you eat, far too distracted by his features. the way his eyes squint, the noticeable twitch of his lips in annoyance as he checks the new messages in his phone. and it stays just like that until you’re finished, him scrolling on his phone and letting you eat silently as you study his figure that you’ve seen so many times before.

it’s almost like you can’t seem to remember why you deleted his number. but you know you’ll never forget the realizations that came to you months ago.

“go wash your hands, i’ll go start the car.” his words make something rile up within you, why wasn’t he questioning you? or maybe trying to get in your pants and convince you to stay the night. something just didn’t feel right.

“do you want me to say something?” you almost whisper, voice breaking a bit when he’s just staring at you with eyes that make you clench your fist. why couldn’t he at least be angry? you both knew you had something serious, only for you to throw it all away. but you know you have no right to throw a fit about it, and you feel like it’s wrong to want to question why he isn’t upset, or disappointed.

but why do all this?

“well you technically did say ‘something’— heh, but i’m not expecting anything sweetheart. just takin’ care of ya.” toji gives a lazy grin, one that makes your stomach twist. you sigh internally, still feeling guilt ridden. why was he still like this? you knew he was more catering to you when you two had first started dating, but why would he still do this.

“y’know i would’ve tried cooking somethin’ if i went grocery shopping, but i doubt i could pick out all the good stuff like you do..” he murmurs. and it’s your last straw, getting up and following his previous instructions. but when you walk back in the living room he’s finally standing up, handing you one of his large coats off his rack. a simple large and black one made of cotton, it was always your favorite one to wear back when there were cold days in february.

fighting the turmoil within you as toji opens the door, you speak up with every intent to stay true to your words, “toji..” and he makes a noise of acknowledgment, “i’ll tell you why i left you so suddenly like that.. but please understand it’s gonna be when i’m ready..” and the cold november air hits you as you walk out, your furry boots clacking along little bits of early snow.

but he stays silent, it doesn’t feel like the heavy tension you thought it’d be, just something you can’t describe. before you can go down the flight of stairs, a arm wraps around your waist, your body being turned to look at toji. “huh—“ “i never needed to know baby. you’re here now aren’t ‘cha? even if it may not be long.” toji’s assuring smile makes your eyes water, trying to swallow down the lump in your throat filled with everything that’s been eating you alive.

“sorry. m’sorry, sorry, so sorry..” your trails of apologies turn into small sobs as he pulls you into a hug. he shouldn’t be doing this. why is he comforting you when you’re the one who hurt him? what kind of logic is that. is this really the same man who kills for a living?

“p-promise i won’t leave again. i promise.”

“don’t say stupid things like that pretty. you’re a smart girl.”

“but i’ll do it for you..”

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sn4pe · 25 days

Note

absolute WORST severus snape takes you've seen?

gonna organize these from Batshit Horrible to Mildly Irksome

- “James Potter wrote the notes in the HBP potions textbook and Snape stole it”. saw it in a youtube comment and. what

- “Snape is an incel” does he blame all women for his problems? does he hold misogynistic views? does he do misogynistic things? no. just because he had weird history with a woman doesn’t make him a fucking incel bye ppl r so weird for this take.

- Louis Garrel as a faceclaim. who coined this, i just wanna talk. don’t mind the gun in my hand. i just wanna talk i just wanna talk. no cuz this shit has done IRREPARABLE damage to my pinterest i can’t find good snape fcs without being bombarded with louis garrel images (i’m being so dramatic but i HATE HIM) HE DOES NOT LOOK LIKE SEVERUS SNAPE AT ALL

- That he and the marauders’ thing was a “rivalry”. A 4 against 1 is not a rivalry. Just admit your faves are bullies it is 1000% okay to like antagonists.

- that he “deserved” what happened in the SWM chapter. idc what awful shit he believed at the time, he was FIFTEEN. he was a CHILD and anyone who doesn’t understand that is likely a child themselves

- that he’s “greasy because of the potions fumes” no bc then everyone would be greasy after potions class and it would be mentioned. severus was a severely neglected child. he never got into the habit of properly bathing himself and that carried on into adulthood.

- when people snatch his entire character and personality and everything and push it onto regulus, then claim to hate snape but loveee regulus black. like bro you just gave him snape’s entire arc word for word but now suddenly bc it’s regulus it’s a good redemption arc? bffr

- every single time he’s ever been mentioned in that rlly popular fanfiction All The Young Dudes. actually every single take in All The Young Dudes is bad. and this isn’t snape specific or anything but i heard that some professor at a university made his students read ATYD for a project. and i’m. flabbergasted bc it’s the biggest piece of horseshit. like snape stuff aside its not a well written fanfiction. it just has all the shiny bells and whistles that the marauders fandom likes.

- relating to that point, the draco malfoyification of severus snape in marauders fanfics in order to make him the antagonist. like i get you want an antagonist but. ugh just irksome it’s not true to his character

- JKR’s drawing of snape w a beard. like who the hell is that

- when ppl hc him to have abs. why?? because he lifted a few cauldrons? bffr

I could probably think of a billion more since this fandom is a nightmare but. yes there u go <3 ily ty for asking i genuinely love answering these

#i love to yap #if you disagree with any of these ur wrong btw #severus snape #snape #harry potter #pro snape #the marauders #ATYD #SWM #hot takes #not hot more like lukewarm

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https-hunter · 4 months

Text

Mean girls (2024) thoughts

(obviously spoilers for the movie!)

- personally, I loved it. As someone who’s been totally (not) normal about the og mean girls movie since 2015 and saw the musical on broadway, the target audience was me

- Reneé Rapp Regina my beloved. She was the Regina I saw on broadway so this was extra special to me

- MS NORBURY AND PRINCIPAL DUVALL ARE A COUPLE?? “Can you run this?” “Fine but you walk the dogs the rest of the week” “I love you” “I love you too”. I’m so glad she found a good guy after her divorce <3

- Janis was such a vibe. Idk she just reminds me of myself in high school but with my current fashion sense. Weird art kid rep !!

- I cried twice. Once when they showed cady in kenya bc I always cry at musical opening numbers and again when Mrs. Heron said September 9th. THATS MY BIRTHDAY THEY SAID MY BIRTHDAY IN THE MOVIE

- When Damien performed the icarly theme song in french like it was a film from the 1930s. That was so real of him

- I think it’s actually really important for gen z to have their own version of this story. The explicit queerness of Janis was great. Waaay less of the casual fatphobia that was rampant in the 2000s. As someone who grew up loving mean girls, but also relatively recently graduated from high school, I can relate to this one more and it felt so nice

- in a similar vein, I liked the use of social media throughout the movie. It felt real, like how teens actually use it. This movie just didn’t feel like it was making fun of teens, like a lot of teen media does nowadays

- It’s so funny to me that they’re just not revealing what Glen Coco looks like. Not even some random extra. It’s just everyone reacting to Glen Coco getting the candy cane grams, but no shots of Glen

- WHY is Megan Thee Stallion giving input to drama at some high school in Illinois?? I love how she’s getting into acting now

- Also. The fact that they get real tiktokers sent me. Why did I see chris olsen in this movie

- The beanie baby 😭 so real for girls who grew up in the 2000s

- Lindsey Lohan being at the mathlete competition was everything to me. It was my version of Tobey McGuire & Andrew Garfield in no way home

- I thought the detail that Karen’s necklace with her name on it was backwards several times. She’s so stupid and I love her <3

- Speaking of Karen, her expressions were so funny. Just like this for 90% of the movie 👁️ 👁️

- Principal Duvall’s still got carpal tunnel after all this time, huh

- When Karen was trying on different Halloween costumes, I noticed that she had one of the tank top with the holes cut in it like Regina had in the first movie. We love to see callbacks like that

- Lastly, it was a good movie! People who say it’s bad don’t know what they’re talking about. They probably just didn’t know it was a musical or anything about the musical. But as someone who adores every adaptation of mean girls (except for the “sequel”), it was great!! Ppl who hate it just don’t like fun ig

#mean girls 2024 #mean girls

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laxmiree · 9 months

Text

[CN] MLQC Lucien’s Blooming Amidst Turbulent Desires MQ translation

⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️

This post contains a detailed spoiler for a MQ that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~

[Warning]: The content of this MQ is pretty explicit and may not be suitable for individuals under the age of 17 (CN server). It is recommended that those who do not meet this age requirement refrain from proceeding beyond this point.

As Lucien speaks, he raises his hand under my gaze and meticulously unbuttons the topmost button.

In the faint and elusive light and shadow, his slender neck and collarbone gradually reveal themselves, following the movements of his fingertips and the downward opening of his collar.

Lucien, as if completely unaware, raises his hand and casually winds the work badge around his wrist, tightening it leisurely.

“As you can see, I can't move freely right now.”

‘‘So, would you say I'm cooperative enough like this?”

[Note: This time I haven’t had time to subtitle due to acads and research stuff. I’ll do subtitle later when I have time, for now I’ll just post the transcript to quench ppl curiousity lol. If you want to follow along the voice acting you can follow here]

[Exclusive Radio- Longing for Returning Home]

Conference Participant: Professor Lucien... Professor Lucien, please stay!

Lucien: Hm? Is there something you need from me?

Conference Participant: Just heard from other professors, did you book the earliest flight back home on the day the conference ends?

Lucien: Yes, that's correct. Is there anything else related to the conference that I need to be involved in afterward?

Conference Participant: No, it's just that I feel it's a pity for you to leave in such a hurry.

Conference Participant: Granada can be considered a famous tourist destination. It's a rare opportunity to come here, so why not appreciate the scenery?

Conference Participant: Why don't you join other professors and explore the local area for a few more days? I'd be happy to extend my hospitality to you as a host.

Lucien: Thank you for your kind intentions. It's just that due to our respective business travel arrangements, my girlfriend and I haven't seen each other for a long time.

Lucien: When we were talking just now, we discussed our itineraries. She will be returning to our home country a few days before me. By the time the conference is over, she should be waiting for me at home.

Lucien: Being by her side is more relaxing for me than traveling around.

Conference Participant: Girlfriend? Oh, is it the person who messaged you during dinner today?

Conference Participant: Haha, no wonder you looked at your phone in a good mood and even took photos of the churros on the table from different angles.

Conference Participant: So, you were taking those pictures for her, huh?

Lucien: (chuckles) You caught me… Um, she's curious about the snack.

Lucien: It's a pity that I can't bring a portion back for her to taste.

Conference Participant: Indeed, freshly fried items like that don't hold up well during long-distance transportation. However, there are other local souvenirs you can bring back from the area.

Conference Participant: I remember some shops are selling hand-painted tea sets and unique patterned textiles... They are very popular among girls.

Lucien: (in an interested tone) Is that so…

Lucien: Can you send me the address of the shops you just mentioned?

Lucien: If I have some free time during the conference in the next few days, I'd like to go and take a look.

Conference Participant: No problem, I will send it to you shortly.

Conference Participant: Ah, originally I was planning to be the spokesperson for a few other professors, and we were all going to travel together for a few days.

Conference Participant: Seeing you like this, I won't continue to persuade you anymore.

Lucien: Indeed, when the heart longs to return*, it's hard to stay for long.

(T/N: "归心似箭" is an idiom that literally translates to "the heart returns like an arrow." It is used to describe the strong longing and eagerness to return home or to a familiar place. It expresses his sentiment of wanting to go back to her, his 'home' where he truly belongs and feels comfortable 🥺)

Lucien: When we have the opportunity in the future, I will come back to Granada with her and explore the scenery and cuisine here.

[Part 1]

The taxi speeds along the cobblestone streets of Granada, passing through the dappled light and shadow beneath the palm leaves.

Moving forward, the outline of a hotel in the distance gradually becomes clear. The colored mosaic wall reflects a bright luster in the sunlight.

I compare it with the photo on my phone and feel pleasantly surprised. I give a thumbs-up to the driver beside me.

MC: You're amazing! That's the hotel!

The driver raises his eyebrows in satisfaction, smoothly turning the steering wheel. I switch back to the chat interface, suppressing my excitement as I look at the message just sent by Lucien.

Lucien's message: "If I remember correctly, you are finishing work and returning from Finland today, right?"

MC's reply: "Yes, I'm currently checking in for the flight with my colleagues. How about you? How much longer until you return home?"

Lucien's message: "Very soon. The conference has entered its final stage, and it will end within the next two or three days."

MC's reply: "Sigh, it's been almost a month since we last saw each other. Even two or three days feel so long…"

I switch to a music app and deliberately share a sad love song with a mournful melody.

I imagine him in front of the screen, raising his eyebrows with a slightly helpless expression, and I hold back a laugh as I step out of the taxi.

As I walk, my fingertips slide across the screen, searching for the room number he had told me during our previous conversation. Suddenly, a notification for a new message pops up.

Lucien's message: "Mm, I also really want to see you."

My heart suddenly becomes soft. As soon as the elevator door slides open, I eagerly walk towards the corridor and stop in front of the door of room 1609.

I suppress my quickening heartbeat and knock on the door, then speak in a rough and hoarse voice.

MC: Good afternoon sir, room service.

When he opens the door and sees me, Lucien should briefly be taken aback, then call out my name and hug me, right?

As if in response to this speculation, the next second, the familiar voice slowly but steadily emerges from the room.

Lucien: The door is open. Come in please.

MC: (suprised)….

While this makes it more convenient, how can this person have no sense of caution? I must remind him properly later.

With these thoughts in mind, I gently lift the suitcase and hold my breath as I push open the heavy room door.

The bright and spacious suite exudes tranquility, and the gauze curtains gently sway by the floor-to-ceiling window. I quickly scan the room but don't see the familiar figure I've been yearning for day and night.

I place the suitcase against the wall and am about to walk towards the inner area when suddenly, I hear a familiar voice from behind me.

Lucien: I've been waiting for you for a long time.

With his words, warm arms envelop me. The familiar scent embraces me from behind, instantly wrapping me in a hug.

I let out a surprised gasp and felt the softness of his hair brushing against my neck, causing a slight itching sensation.

In his usually calm voice, now there's an unmistakable sense of joy that can't be ignored.

Lucien: (playfully) So, this hotel even has such thoughtful room service, huh?

[Part 2]

Upon hearing his voice, my heart seemed to be filled with light and joyful happiness all of a sudden.

I smile and release the handle of the suitcase, swiftly turning around and throwing myself into this long-lost embrace.

The hand around my waist tightens imperceptibly. Lucien's nose gently nestles itself in my hair, and he lets a barely audible sigh.

The shadows of the trees sway in the tranquil room. Neither of us speaks as if we want to make up for the time apart over the past month through this wholehearted embrace.

After a moment, I finally raise my head and look into his slightly brightened eyes.

MC: I had planned to give you a surprise! How did you guess that it was me who came?

Lucien tilts his head slightly, indicating for me to look at the Bluetooth earphones in his ear.

Lucien: I was just about to play the song you sent me and carefully "appreciate" it, but unexpectedly, it automatically connected to another device.

Lucien: So, I guessed you must be nearby.

MC: Damn it, I can't believe I was caught at the last moment because of such a small detail.

(T/N: "功亏一篑" is an idiom that means to fail at the last moment due to a minor mistake or oversight. It describes a situation where one's efforts fall short of success, often due to a small oversight or mistake, after putting in a lot of effort up until that point.)

I playfully raise my hand in a mock expression of displeasure, and Lucien cooperatively lowers his head, his slender eyebrows slightly curved.

Lucien: But I feel that no matter how it happens, your presence itself is already enough of a surprise.

MC: (laughs) Professor Lucien, you're getting better and better at coaxing me aren’t you?

As I say this, I reach out and ruffle his hair. Lucien doesn't get up; instead, he leans closer and gazes at my cheek.

Lucien: Weren't you supposed to return to our home country with the team today? How come you came to Granada on your own?

MC: You know the answer already... What do you think?

I let out a soft hum and coquettishly poke Lucien's arm.

MC: I had to take a connecting flight from Finland because there were no direct flights. After landing, I took a long taxi ride to find this hotel.

MC: I must say, it's really difficult to meet Professor Lucien in person.

Lucien holds my hand and nods earnestly.

Lucien: Mm, it is indeed very challenging. (playfully faking a sigh) What should I do, how to reward this hardworking Miss Producer who traveled from afar?

I look around and point to the soft-looking sofa by the window.

MC: Then, I want to ask the Great Professor to accompany me to lie down for a while. My waist is sore after traveling for such a long time-!

Before I can even exclaim in surprise, Lucien swiftly picks me up in his arms. The next second, we both sink into the sofa bathed in the scent of sunlight.

I laugh and sit up, using one hand to support myself against his chest.

MC: (laughs happily) You're pulling a sneak attack!

Lucien: (laughs softly) What sneak attack, I've only learned a thing or two from Teacher MC.

As Lucien speaks, he tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear, and I take the opportunity to intertwine my fingers with his. I gaze at the person beneath me, lost in my own thoughts.

Even though we video call every few days, being this close and gazing at each other, I can still sense some subtle changes.

His cheeks seem a little thinner; I wonder if it's due to not liking the food or being too busy to eat properly.

His hair has grown longer, now covering his eyebrows when lying down like this. Under his eyes... there seems to be a faint shadow of dark circles.

I can't help but put down my smile, and my hand gently brushes against the area under his eyes.

MC: (displeased) You even have dark circles... Didn't you say the conference was entering its final stage? Why aren't you resting properly?

Lucien: It was only the introduction of new topics that had come to an end, and the information left over from the previous meeting needed to be summarised.

Lucien: We still need to make good use of the time before the wrap-up.

MC: So do you still have work scheduled for today?

Lucien: Um, there is still much experimental data to compare. After summarizing the results, I must submit the analysis report to the organizers before ten o'clock.

MC: Is that so? I had hoped to hug you a little longer... Sigh, I guess I'll have to watch work take you away again.

I glance at the remaining time, reluctantly about to get up, but Lucien shows no intention of letting me go.

The hand around my waist tightens a little more, making me bend my elbow and get even closer to him.

As soon as I get closer, his warm lips follow, gently and affectionately kissing from the sensitive curve of my ear to my cheek.

Unable to resist the tickling sensation, I laugh and tilt my head slightly, trying to evade. The next second, Lucien firmly holds my jaw with a little dissatisfied expression.

Lucien: (gasps and whispers hoarsely) MC, don't hide…

With a hoarse voice near my ear, his cool and slender fingers caress my neck, slowly trailing upwards with an irresistible hint.

Wet and deep kisses accompany his movements, falling on my body like drizzle.

I clench the corner of his clothes tightly, unconsciously tilting my head back, feeling the sunlight reflected off the glass flash before my eyes.

I close my eyes, and it seems like my mind is also becoming hazy in this intense heat.

It isn't until the curtain hanging above us brushes against my face that I finally come to my senses. I take a breath and push Lucien's shoulder as if waking him up.

MC: W-Wait a moment.

Lucien: (breathless, in a hoarse and somewhat dazed voice) …Huh?

Lucien's dark eyes are filled with turbulent depth, and his hair is slightly damp. The actions of his hands don't stop; as if he is about to lean down again the next second.

I try to push his shoulder harder, my breath slightly unsteady as I speak.

MC: Didn't you just say that there is still a lot of data to organize and summarize?

MC: ...Then, now... shouldn't we…?

Lucien: (still trying to steady his breath) Mm.

Lucien responds vaguely, his lips still lingering on the side of my neck.

Lucien: (whispers very lowly in a clingy tone) But right now... I can't bear to let you go.

The intimate bewitchment leaves me feeling dizzy. I try to hold on to what little rationality I have left and tilt my head up to peck his nose.

MC: If Professor Lucien is going to be this unreasonable, I seriously need to consider whether I should continue creating these "surprises" in the future.

Lucien tightens his lips, a hint of leniency and resignation flashing across his face. I button up my disheveled collar, smiling as I stand up from the sofa and nuzzle against his neck.

MC: (smiles) We still have a few more days to spend together, there's no need to rush…

MC: But I'll be here working with you~ After you're done with your busy work, we can go out and have a delicious meal!

I say as I walk to the luggage. After a moment, the sound of the sofa rubbing against the floor finally emerges.

Only then do I sit next to him, gently holding my notebook. I casually place a pillow behind my back and begin browsing through my work notes from the past few days.

Perhaps it's because I'm by his side, I feel like I'm back at home, and without realizing it, I become more relaxed and at ease.

After flipping another page, I lazily adjusted to a more comfortable position, and one of my feet habitually rested on his leg.

The room falls silent for a moment, with only occasional faint sounds of paper rustling. After a while, Lucien suddenly speaks my name in a low voice.

Lucien: MC.

I respond absentmindedly, my eyes still fixed on the screen. The voice by my ear pauses briefly, seemingly carrying a hint of helplessness.

Lucien: Do you want to go inside and wait for me?

MC: Hey, did I disturb you? But I haven't even made much noise.

I don't understand, so I lift my head from the screen and notice Lucien's eyes flickering unusually. Suddenly, I grasp what's happening.

A mischievous idea springs up. I lift my heels and move along the long legs hugged by his trousers.

MC: You haven't said the reason why you suddenly 'asked me to leave' yet.

Through the firm fabric, the legs beneath my tiptoes seem to tense for a moment. I persistently speak up, refusing to relent.

MC: Did I really 'disturb you? Professor Lucien, could it be that you can't even resist this level of 'temptation'?

MC: Oh, this won't do~ When doing research, you must stay focused. How can you let yourself get distracted by a little bee that tests your self-control?

With those words, my tiptoes press on his leg, watching as Lucien bites his lip, and I can't help but curl up the corners of my mouth.

Having witnessed his usual ease, the sight of him struggling to restrain himself now makes me tempted to tease him further... Unfortunately, it's not the right moment.

However, being able to see him so openly longing is enough to satisfy me.

I close my notes, intending to leave as soon as I can, and am about to do so when he suddenly grabs my ankle.

Lucien's voice seems a little hoarse, and his fingertips are caressing gently.

Lucien: (whispers hoarsely) My teacher's "lesson" is indeed something.

Lucien: (x2) In terms of concentration, I indeed still have much to learn.

Lucien: (x3!!) So, (chuckle) can MC teach me how to do it?

His voice seems to carry a certain bewitchment. My breath catches for a moment, but I quickly snap out of it.

He's setting another trap, waiting for me to step into it willingly.

I let out a light snort in my heart. I pretend to take the bait and place my hand on his face.

MC: Of course, I can. However, I believe in tailoring my teaching to the individual, so I need to have a basic understanding of the student's situation first.

MC: Tell me, how far can you restrain yourself when facing my advances? And what would your reactions be at different levels of the advances?

Lucien holds my hand on his cheek, and lightly rubs against it, as if teasingly.

Lucien: This is a bit challenging for me.

Lucien: (chuckle) After all, when faced with your 'invitation', I seem to have never tried to resist.

I let out a long "oh," my voice softening a bit.

MC: They say learning requires understanding things thoroughly. Since there are things I don't understand, I have to figure them out.

Lucien: So, how does Teacher MC want to conduct this research?

I lock eyes with Lucien for a moment, then suddenly withdraw my fingertips from his hand, leaning forward to lightly peck his lips.

Before he can react, I quickly get up from the sofa and take two steps back, smiling mischievously as I speak.

MC: How about we conduct a little experiment~ Let me see how self-controlled Professor Lucien can be when he gets serious.

MC: I will adjust the variables to obtain accurate results. After all, as your special assistant, I've also accumulated a lot of experience and knowledge.

MC: Then, the experiment of an intern professor officially begins now. I kindly request this gentleman to cooperate accordingly.

MC: As for this special report, I will definitely record it diligently~

[Part 2-Intertwined Memory]

=Flashback, Narrator POV=

In the afternoon sunlight, there's a hazy and drowsy warmth floating around.

The cicadas are buzzing loudly, but Lucien seems completely unaware as he browses through the continuous stream of data. Other than the movements of his fingertips while flipping through the materials, he remains almost motionless at the desk.

Until the sound of a text message, like a small pebble, broke the frozen silence.

MC: "Yes, I'm currently checking in for the flight with my colleagues. How about you? How much longer until you return home?"

Looking at the message from the girl, Lucien's expression softened subconsciously. Thinking about the schedule that still had two or three more days to go, he lets out a light sigh.

When he realizes his actions just now, he pauses for a moment.

...It's strange. Whether for himself or the girl, business trips have become routine. He shouldn't feel this kind of helplessness.

Being separated from her just feels like something he can't get used to, no matter what.

After pondering for a moment, he replies in a composed tone, detailing the upcoming work arrangements.

However, he can't help but continue scrolling through the photos the girl had sent during their previous chat, not putting down the phone just yet.

She pointed at the reindeer statue behind her, her eyes shining as she looked at the camera; the photo of her holding up her unappetizing work lunch, making a distressed expression and sticking out her tongue.

The last picture is of the entrance to the Arctic Museum, with a caption that read, "If you were here, I'm sure I could understand more clearly."

Lucien's lips unconsciously raised upwards, and his fingertips gently stroke the phone screen.

During the days they hadn't seen each other, it seemed that the girl's life had experienced many exciting moments.

Even though they chatted every day and occasionally shared interesting experiences through video calls, he still felt it wasn't enough.

Having grown accustomed to the girl's company, this time their parting feels exceptionally long. The fleeting moments shared through digital communication can't fill the missing hole left behind.

Lucien purses his lips and gently places the phone on the table.

Just wait a little longer... When they meet again in a few days, he is determined to embrace her and listen to her happily recount all the moments she didn't have a chance to share.

Ding.

The notification sound rings again. The girl sends a sentimental love song—a melodramatic tune with a cliché title "Golden Song of the Year."

Imagining her acting sorrowful, Lucien can't help but curve his lips and replies with a "Mm, I miss you too."

Afterward, he takes out the Bluetooth earphones from the case, intending to listen to her spontaneous sharing. As his gaze unintentionally sweeps across his phone screen, he suddenly freezes.

...there is no indication of a connection on the screen.

These earphones seem to have automatically paired with another device.

Lucien instinctively holds his breath, carefully listening to the sounds outside the room. Soon, he hears familiar footsteps in the corridor, precisely stopping at the door.

In the next moment, the heavy door is knocked on. Someone deliberately lowers their voice and speaks in a rough manner, "Good Afternoon, sir, room service."

It's her.

His heartbeat seems to quicken involuntarily. Lucien stands up from the desk and walks lightly towards the door.

As he walks, that missing hole seems to be suddenly filled by some intangible presence, gurgling and flowing gently.

The warm breeze in Granada lifts a soft corner of the curtain, and the vibrant colors of summer flood into the room.

Lucien: The door is open. Come in please.

Lucien heard himself speak.

=Flashback and Narrator POV END=

[Part 3]

I walk quickly to the inner room, hook the door handle with my hand, and slowly close the door, blocking the view behind me.

I hold my breath and listen carefully through the gap in the door. After a moment of silence, the sound of paper flipping resumes. It seems that Lucien has started working again.

I comfortably lie down on the lounge chair and continue to look at my notes. Occasionally, I raise my head to glance in the direction of the balcony outside.

The soft curtains gently sway with the breeze, concealing the figure in the living room from my view.

Is Lucien currently working diligently? If I don't do anything, how long will it take for him to knock on this door?

I retract my gaze and ponder with interest. In the warm afternoon breeze, I lazily flip to the next page of the data.

As the sunlight slowly moves to the west, the steaming heat gradually dissipates. When I raise my head again, I realize that the sky has darkened.

*sexy bgm playing*

I walk to the balcony and notice that the lights are on in the living room, casting a shadow of Lucien on the gauze curtain. I yawn and glance at my phone.

The afternoon has passed since the announcement of the experiment, yet there hasn't been a knock on the door. I haven't even received a message from Lucien.

MC: Huh? When you get serious, you actually have quite a strong willpower.

I squinted my eyes as I looked at the shadow cast on the gauze curtain. It seems that it's time to introduce some "bait" as the experiment's variable.

After contemplating for a moment, I unhurriedly send him a message.

MC's message: "Is the work still going smoothly~"

I spin a pen around my fingers, and soon enough, my phone receives a reply.

Lucien's reply: "Mm, I've already read most of it."

MC's message: "So, Professor Lucien is quite efficient when I'm not around, huh."

MC's message: "Speaking of which, would sending text messages disturb you?"

On the other end of the screen, Lucien seems to have pondered seriously for a moment before replying.

Lucien's reply: "If only seeing the text, it seems to be manageable."

Oh~ that means there might be a little ripple in his heart, but not so much. Come to think of it, we do indeed communicate more frequently through voice calls.

If I were to use 'voice' to entice him, what would his reaction be?

MC's message: "I'll be relieved then~ However, it's almost 9 o'clock now. How much longer will it be until you can rest with me?"

The name in the chat box is replaced by "Typing..." A moment later, a new message alert sounds again.

Lucien's reply: "It will take some more time to process the remaining data. You can go ahead and rest."

MC's message: "But I'm having trouble falling asleep Q.Q How about letting me listen to the sound of you working? It can serve as a soothing white noise to help me sleep."

After a moment, Lucien's voice dialed in, his calm voice is accompanied by the sound of pages flipping.

Lucien: (in a calm yet a bit wronged tone) I thought a certain Miss Professor who's immersed in the experiment wouldn't come to see me today.

MC: Haha, actually, I was planning to just sleep like that. But…

MC: Thinking that you're so close to me, I feel a little unwilling to give in to sleep.

Lucien's breathing seems to have slowed down a bit, but he still speaks calmly and unhurriedly.

Lucien: Alright, rest assured and take your time. We don't have to rush things, after all, we still have several days to spend together, don't we?

...This person has quite a good memory.

(lol he 'jabs' her back with the same sentence that she said earlier 😂)

I silently curl the corners of my lips and casually respond as if nothing happened.

MC: Indeed, that makes sense. Oh well, don't mind me anymore, just focus on your work~

Lucien responds with a sound but doesn't say anything further. On the other end of the phone, the sound of flipping pages resumes.

The rustling sound mixed with faint breathing noise echoes in my ears, like the evening breeze brushing through the drooping branches. I lift my fingertips, tracing the shadow cast on the window.

MC: Lucien, actually I've been thinking about how to spend this evening with you since several days ago.

Lucien: Hmm? (chuckles, and then whispers seductively) What have you imagined?

I chuckle softly and shift to a more comfortable position, leaning against the railing.

MC: ...Many things. Um, so many things.

MC: I heard this place is famous for its night views, and many hotels have private outdoor baths.

MC: Embracing each other under the cover of night, watching the flickering lights on the water's surface... It should be a very cozy and romantic experience.

MC: Or maybe like our previous trip, getting close under the moonlight, sharing a glass of red wine, and then…

I let out a soft sigh, as if recalling the lingering and intoxicating kisses from that night.

The sound of flipping pages on the other end of the phone stopped at some point. I turn my head with interest and speak softly.

MC: Do you really have to work on your report until so late tonight?

MC: After being apart for so long... I really miss you.

The shadow cast on the gauze curtain seems to pause for a moment, and an unspoken understanding silently flows between us by our ears.

When he speaks again, Lucien's tone is subtly deeper than before.

Lucien: (his voice noticeably deeper and a bit hoarse) This lady has quite a gift for teasing people, even more so than I had imagined.

MC: (pretending to be dumb)...Why suddenly bring that up? I just wanted to chat with you, that's all.

Lucien: (slowly whispers) Is that so? It seems like I misunderstood then.

Lucien: (whispers with even lower and more hoarse voice) I originally thought this was an observational experiment with escalating variables.

I lazily raise my tone at the end of my sentence.

MC: Can't it be both? While I do want to conduct the experiment, I also want to tell you the truth.

MC: Don't you have anything to tell me right now?

The shadow on the gauze curtain gently sways with the breeze, and Lucien seems to chuckle softly.

Lucien: (chuckles softly) For example?

MC: For example... "Miss Professor, I want to terminate this experiment early because I miss you very much too."

MC: However, I only accept applications submitted in person.

I hang up the phone before Lucien can say anything else, feeling intrigued as I gaze in the direction outside.

Will this door be knocked on tonight?

[Part 4]

The warm morning light streams through the floor-to-ceiling windows of the balcony, drenching the room with harmonious light and shadow.

I sit in front of the dressing table, lost in thought as I tidy my clothes and glance at the door that remains unknocked. I purse my lips slightly.

I pick up the notebook and write the word "physical contact" next to "sound".

Dealing with this cunning person, it seems like it's time to further upgrade the variables.

If I "tempt" him a little today, he'll probably cross that boundary, won't he? After all, yesterday he seemed reluctant to let me go on the sofa.

As I'm reminiscing about the unfinished 'embrace', I suddenly hear a knock on the door behind me, and the door is gently pushed open.

Lucien leans against the door, smiling as he meets my gaze through the mirror. There seems to be nothing unusual in his expression.

Lucien: Breakfast has arrived, do you want to eat together?

MC: Coming right up!

I take three quick steps and grab the hem of his clothes, leading him toward the outer room while teasing him as I speak.

MC: Let me guess, it's not black coffee with bread again, is it?

Lucien: Of course not. I had the hotel prepare some local churros for us. I remember that you mentioned being curious about its taste in our previous conservation.

Lucien then speaks as his gaze falls on my ear.

Lucien: (chuckle) Your earring seems to be slightly askew.

I blink belatedly. I'm about to raise my hand to adjust it when suddenly I think of something and naturally glance at Lucien.

MC: But I can't see the angle at which the earring is askew... Could you please help me adjust it, Professor Lucien?

I step forward and see Lucien nods as he bends down toward me.

Lucien: Mm, I'd be happy to help.

The warmth of his fingertips reaches my earlobe as the slightly cool earring rotates in my ear piercing. I tilt my head slightly and hear a hint of helplessness in his voice.

Lucien: The clasp design is quite intricate, so don't move around too much for now.

MC: It's just a little disturbance, it should be fine, right?

I smile and lean closer to him, almost feeling the warmth of his breath brushing against my face. The hand near my ear seems to pause for a moment.

MC: Why don't you continue?

The temperature in the air quietly rises amidst the tranquility, his figure silhouetted against the morning light, enveloping me within.

My ear is gently caressed as if by an elusive touch. I gaze into Lucien's deepening eyes, anticipating the kiss that may descend at any moment.

But in the next second, Lucien loosens his fingertips.

Lucien: Hmm, it's all adjusted now.

Amidst my astonished gaze, Lucien straightens up and calmly walks to the dining table. It's as if that momentary flash of action was just my imagination.

I hide my inner astonishment and sit across from Lucien with a calm expression, but my mind is racing with thoughts.

Strange, why does he seem so nonchalant as if nothing happened…

The long-awaited delicacies seem to have lost their appetizing flavor. I stir the juice absentmindedly, not noticing the fleeting smile that appeared on Lucien's face.

After a while, the person in front of me calmly puts down the fork.

Lucien: Weren't you curious about the taste of churro for a long time? Why does it seem like your interest is lacking now?

Lucien: Did you try it and find that it doesn't suit your taste?

MC: ....Haha, maybe I ate too many snacks on the way yesterday.

Lucien: Have some juice first. There's still some work to do at the seminar, I'll head to the reference room first.

MC: So soon... Take it easy. I'll be waiting for you to come back.

I say it while casually adjusting his tie. It's only when I hear the sound of the door closing that I slowly withdraw my gaze.

The variable has already been upgraded from "voice", but Lucien hasn't shown a more noticeable reaction than last night.

Could it be that this light and fleeting "physical contact" wasn't enough? Or is this person deliberately acting like nothing happened?

As I ponder, I set the cup down and suddenly catch a glimpse of a badge lying in the corner of the dining table. Picking it up, I find it contains Lucien's job title and other information.

MC: ...Conference badge? Did he accidentally drop it?

I quickly stand up, ready to return the badge to the conference venue, but suddenly, I pause, as if realizing something.

Then I turn around and go back to the room, putting on the new long dress I bought.

The hotel's architectural structure is far more complex than I had imagined.

With the guidance of several staff members, I finally navigate through the maze of stairs and find the corner where the reference room is located.

The bright corridor is empty, with no one in sight, and occasionally, I can hear faint footsteps in the distance, but they never come close. I withdraw my gaze and gently push open the door in front of me.

The air seems to be infused with the subtle scent of books. The dark metal chandelier and the light wooden bookshelves work together to create a bright and clean atmosphere.

As expected, there is no one in the reference room at this moment. I tread lightly, passing through the light and shadows cast by the rows of bookshelves until I finally spot Lucien in the corner.

He is dressed in a cold white lab coat, sitting on a chair, his gaze lowered as he flips through something. His slender fingers occasionally brush over the yellowed pages.

The eyes and eyebrows that are usually slightly curved when facing me are now focused and carry a distant coldness that keeps others to remain at a respectful distance.

Perhaps it's because I haven't seen Lucien in work mode for a long time, I couldn't help but stop in my tracks and silently watch him for a moment before finally walking over.

Noticing the sound behind him, Lucien casually raises his eyes to look. He seems somewhat surprised and lets out a soft "Hm?". The expression in his eyes instantly softens.

Lucien: How did you find your way here?

MC: I came to deliver something to a certain careless professor~

I smiled and waved the work badge in my hand, walking briskly to his side while also glancing around the area.

An extensive collection of anatomical diagrams and texts, medical tools, and X-ray films emitting a cold glow... I withdrew my gaze and curiously asked.

MC: Is this conference related to medicine?

Lucien sets the work badge aside and naturally takes my hand in his.

Lucien: Mm, it mainly focuses on the application of neuroscience in rehabilitation medicine.

Lucien: Local scholars have proposed many ideas in the direction of neural circuits. After exchanging our research progress, we are considering jointly publishing new research findings.

MC: Indeed, sparks are more likely to fly when minds collide~ But why is it that only you are here?

Lucien: The locals are accustomed to having a chat at the dining table after finishing their meal. Since mealtime has just passed, it will take some time before they're coming over.

I nod thoughtfully, keenly picking up on a message — which means, no one will come to disturb us right now.

I respond with an "Oh" and curiously open my mouth to speak.

MC: By the way, we haven't really talked much about your research in this area.

MC: Neuroscience and rehabilitative medicine... Does that mean helping patients recover through certain brain activities?

Lucien: The brain and body are naturally coordinated through interactions to maintain dynamic stability in various basic physiological indicators.

Lucien: Many physiological phenomena are influenced by the central nervous system. Similarly, they can also reflect the state of the human brain and even cognition.

Lucien: If you're curious, I can use heart rate as an example to give a simple explanation.

As Lucien speaks, he casually picks up a stethoscope from the medical kit in the corner. I calmly stroke my chest, but suddenly feel nervous.

If Lucien hears my rapidly beating heart right now, he will probably notice that I'm plotting something…

MC: ...Let me do it! It will leave a deeper impression if I do it myself~

I say as I pick up another stethoscope. I notice Lucien raises an eyebrow and his eyes slightly curve.

Lucien: Not only do I have to be MC's teacher, but I also have to play the role of teaching aid?

MC: Talented people should take on more responsibilities, so I'll trouble you a bit~

As if accepting my words, Lucien obediently leans back on the chair, watching me with interest as I put on the stethoscope.

Just as I'm about to place the stethoscope against his chest, he suddenly extends his hand and I stop him.

MC: Please, Mr. Teaching Aid, stay still and don't move around.

Lucien: Don't misunderstand, I just want to minimize any factors that might affect your auscultation.

As Lucien speaks, he raises his hand under my gaze and meticulously unbuttons the topmost button.

The sound of the buttons coming undone is barely audible in the confined space.

Like a small electric current passing from my auditory nerves to my chest, my heartbeat accelerates uncontrollably.

In the faint and elusive light and shadow, his slender neck and collarbone gradually reveal themselves, following the movements of his fingertips and the downward opening of his collar.

The air in the cramped information room carries a sense of warmth and stuffiness, there seems to be a hint of humidity reflected in his eyes. His jet-black bangs stick moistly to his head.

In the silence, a bead of sweat drips down his jaw, landing silently in the shallow valley that rises and falls with his breath, only to be absorbed by the damp fabric.

I exhale.

The electric currents entwined around my heart suddenly transform into a hidden flame. I can almost hear my breath slowing down as I tighten my grip on the stethoscope head.

Lucien, as if completely unaware, raises his hand and casually winds the work badge around his wrist, tightening it leisurely.

His cold white lab coat is disheveled, and the tie that was neatly adjusted when he left is now loosely hanging around his neck.

Yet, he calmly gazes at me, his tone still carrying a meticulousness that makes one want to break through.

Lucien: As you can see, I can't move freely right now.

Lucien: So, would you say I'm cooperative enough like this?

MC: ...It’s enough!!

As if trying to conceal my increasingly rapid heartbeat, I press the stethoscope against his chest, moving it along the gently rising and falling chest.

Immediately, I hear the low and rhythmic sound filling my ears.

Lucien's voice sounds timely.

Lucien: Did you hear anything?

I purse my lips without showing any emotion, trying my best to maintain a calm tone.

MC: Y-your heartbeat seems to be very fast... 81 beats per minute, is that a normal rate?

Lucien: Don't worry. Under the influence of special factors, a resting heart rate can approach around 100 beats per minute.

Lucien: (with his voice noticeably a bit hoarse and low in the end) The load brought on by exercise, changes in temperature, and the control of the autonomic nervous system... all of these can have an impact on the heart rate.

I seem to sense something and meet Lucien's gaze. His eyes look deep, as if a bit darker than usual.

But I feel like I've been scorched by flames, and my gaze involuntarily flickers. My instinct whispers softly in my ear, telling me that the person in front of me is not as calm as he appears to be.

Even though I don't feel thirsty, my throat involuntarily moves. I grip the stethoscope head, which has warmed up with his body temperature, and continue to slowly lower it.

MC: But we haven't left the data room since a while ago, so we can probably rule out the first two factors.

Lucien: Hm, a very keen deduction. What else?

I can hear the vigorous and rhythmic beats in my ears, almost in sync with the rhythm of my heart beating in my chest.

Lucien's lips curve up with a hint of praise, and his voice still carries a trace of unruffled calmness.

I casually take off the stethoscope. My knees press against the surface of the chair between his legs and move closer to him.

(...she gets on the chair👀)

Our breaths intertwine, and I can almost see my own reflection in his eyes.

MC: Your pupils have dilated a bit, and the color of your eyes has deepened.

MC: From the physiological knowledge I know, there could be many possible reasons…

MC: But considering the earlier deduction and the current situation, it seems like there's only one conclusion.

Lucien seems to let out a very soft laugh, and his hands bound by the lanyard move slightly.

Lucien: Speak out.

My fingertips slide into the tightening gap of the lanyard, pressing against his increasingly warm wrist.

MC: Are you... trying to restrain yourself right now?

MC: Or should I say, you really want to do something right now?

The wrist that I'm touching moves, and the strong pulsations under my fingertips seem to be telling me the answer in advance.

A dangerous curve forms at the corner of Lucien's mouth, and his eyes look at me from bottom to top.

Lucien: (whispers hoarsely) If I say yes, what measures do you plan to take?

My fingertips skillfully hook and release the rope binding his wrist.

The sound of the work badge hitting the ground resonates. Amidst Lucien's sudden proximity and his intense gaze, I softly laugh and speak.

MC: This is my answer.

[Part 4-Intertwined Memory]

(T/N: I KNOW y’all want to jump into the fun part but please read this part first so the next part will make more sense-)

=Flashback From Last Night=

The darkness spreads across the skyline of a foreign land, and distant lights begin to twinkle one by one.

The gauze curtain flutters, and it seems like footsteps can be heard on the balcony outside, but it quickly falls back into silence.

I turn my head slightly, only to find that Lucien has quietly brushed aside the gauze curtain and is leaning against the door, looking at me in silence.

In the flowing tranquility, ambiguity grows quietly like creeping vines. I tuck the strands of hair lifted by the night breeze behind my ear and gaze back into his eyes.

MC: At this hour... Professor Lucien, are you planning to submit an application to terminate the experiment early?

Lucien smiles and shakes his head.

Lucien: (chuckles) I'm afraid I'll have to disappoint Miss Professor.

Lucien: I just thought that there are some special circumstances in the experiment, and perhaps we need to discuss them.

I raise an eyebrow and teasingly ask for more details.

MC: Is that so? How come I feel like you deliberately found an excuse to see me?

MC: If you change the experiment process without permission, be careful, I'll consider that as cheating.

Lucien's lips curl up with a hint of slyness, and he takes a step forward.

The warm airflow brushes against his bangs, revealing those deep eyes as dark as the night.

Lucien: It's just a step-by-step progression, from hearing your voice to seeing you in person. Next, MC can continue upgrading from the current level.

Lucien: Or... are the variables you prepared ending here?

Under his smiling gaze, I choke for a moment but casually speak as if nothing happened.

MC: ...Hmph, of course not.

MC: Then do tell me, what are the circumstances you want to discuss with me?

Lucien nods and speaks seriously.

Lucien: In actual scientific research, there are several possibilities that may lead to the experiment being terminated prematurely, aside from the participants voluntarily withdrawing their applications.

MC: Hmm, I haven't heard you mention this before... For example?

Lucien: Insufficient rigor in the process, lack of experimental funding, missing key personnel... Of course, our experiment won't involve such complex factors.

Lucien: Excluding all of the above, there is only one situation that needs to be avoided.

A hint of nervousness mixed with curiosity arises. I blink my eyes and instinctively ask for further clarification.

MC: What is it?

Lucien: The experiment leader voluntarily announces giving up.

There seems to be a hint of implication in his low voice. I pause for a moment and then nod with understanding, shaking my index finger slightly.

MC: Professor Lucien is worrying too much~ In this self-control experiment, there won't be such a possibility occurring.

Lucien chuckles softly.

Lucien: At the beginning of any experiment, the experiment leader is filled with enthusiasm and belief. However, as it progresses, their mindset can unconsciously change.

Lucien: So I believe there's no need to rush to a conclusion... After all, you just said it yourself, that you really wanted to see me, right?

As he speaks, Lucien's body quietly draws closer. The night breeze is gentle, making the end of my hair caressing his face, as if there are some hidden thoughts entwined between us.

Even though we are still leaning on the railings of our respective rooms, I can't help but feel like he can hear the drumming heartbeat in my chest.

Lucien: I do have something I haven't told you yet.

Lucien: Not just today, but every night since we parted... (whispers softly) I've been missing you.

My heartbeat suddenly quickens. Under his focused gaze, I try to distract myself by pinching my palm, attempting to appear nonchalant as I avert my gaze.

MC: Hearing this before going to bed, I think I can have sweet dreams tonight.

MC: But if you want me to give up, you'll have to try a little harder~ Good Night, Professor Lucien.

Lucien gazes at me intently for a moment, then sighs lightly and straightens his body.

Lucien: (chuckle) …Good night, MC.

I nod and return to the room under Lucien's gaze. Calmly, I close the gauze curtain, then place my hand on my chest. My heartbeat is so fast that it feels like it could take flight.

I let out a sigh, half delighted and half annoyed, and bury my heated ears in the blanket.

What sweet dreams... Tonight, I probably won't be able to sleep.

[NOTE THAT, in this flashback Lucien is giving MC two choices that’ll available for her through the experiment, for MC to keep increasing the variables; or to stop the experiment by announcing that she's giving up with the experiment. And as you can see from part 3, MC still hasn't announced her surrender, only making it harder for Lucien to control himself by taking off the work badge. Since she hasn't announced her surrender, as far as both of them know the experiment still goes on, Lucien still needs to control himself, and she will increase the variable in the next part.]

[Part 5]

The air in the afternoon seems to be frozen in the silent gaze, with only the heat slowly spreading between us.

The heartbeat beneath my fingertips, the breath brushing against my face... everything about the person in front of me is telling me that he shares the same desires as I do.

I let out a sigh and dazedly gaze into Lucien's dark eyes. Suddenly, I feel a little regretful.

If we don't start this experiment, we would have more time to enjoy.

However, he's so smart that even if I don't say anything, he should have sensed my silent surrender, right? ...Then why doesn’t he 'respond' to me quickly?

I whispered in my heart, my high heels fell to the ground somewhere along the line and tangled with the pile of work badge.

Lucien: MC….

Lucien didn't speak, he just softly murmured my name.

The hand gripping my waist is caressing and tightening, as if wanting to embed me in an embrace, yet also trying to stop my movements.

The voice by my ear is as low as a sigh, brushing against my crumbling rationality. I clutch onto his clothes and bite my lips in frustration.

[Note: to avoid CN censorship- the narrative doesn't describe her actions and focuses more on her thoughts as she increases the variables and makes advances, remember that from the previous part (Part 4) Lucien is sitting on a chair, and MC also get on it- Now his breath is brushing against her face, so they're now looking face-to-face, the high heels fell to the ground somewhere along the line, so she's been on his lap for quite… some time now. She's a bit frustrated that Lucien hasn't 'responded' to her 'movements' on his lap. To put it bluntly, she’s ‘riding’ him right now.]

At this moment, Lucien's phone suddenly rings with a notification sound.

A sudden clarity flashes through my hazy mind, and I instinctively turn my head to see "The Seminar Group invites you to join the voice conference" flashing on the screen.

MC: ….

As my drowsy rationality returns, I become aware of the burning sensation in my ears. Worried about what urgent work might be, I force myself* to lean forward and take the phone from the table, handing it to him.

(T/N: 强撑 means to force oneself to do something despite struggles or difficulties, and of course, she's struggling to lean forward and take the phone because she is 'stuck' on his d-)

Lucien takes the phone with one hand, but the hand holding my waist doesn't let go. He softly shushes and casually taps on the screen.

The noisy voices suddenly come through the receiver, breaking the cramped silence.

Scholar A: ...I insist we need more evidence for this experiment.

Scholar B: It would be a waste of time..... Why do you keep quiet, Dr. Lucien?

Lucien: Keep going. I'm listening.

Despite saying so, his eyes are still stained by the tide and remain fixed on my face, as if he has no intention of letting me go.

I shake his unmoving arm, feeling slightly stifled by the situation.

Just a moment ago, he was acting all calm and unmoved, and now he's pulling and teasing me like this….

I lower my head with a hint of resentment, following the force on my waist as I go down and vent my frustration by biting him on the shoulder.

I hear a restrained gasp near my ear as I take his phone a little further away and quickly lean in to whisper in Lucien's ear.

MC: Since you have important matters to attend to, I'll take my leave.

MC: ...Once again, I have to let work occupy you first.

Amid our conversation, footsteps echo in the hallway, getting closer and mingling with the intense discussion that sounds just like the one on the phone.

The scholars who haven't hung up the call seem to have arrived outside the reference room. I swiftly place the phone back into Lucien's hand and get down to pick up my high heels from the ground.

It seems like leaving now is not an option; at least, I have to tidy up our appearances before they come closer….

The next second, my waist is tightly embraced, and I fall back into the embrace behind me again.

Lucien: I've been cooperating with MC's experiment... (whispers hoarsely) but is this as far as the variable changes go? Won't they continue any further?

His tone carries a casual yet dangerous smile. And as if responding to my previous retaliation, his scorching breath slowly trails up my shoulder.

This man is really…!

I lightly hum and give his shoulder a push.

MC: Let's talk about that later. Let me clean up first.

Lucien: No matter the reason, giving up halfway is not a good habit.

The sound of the door opening suddenly echoes, and the noise and footsteps from the corridor rush in. Separated by a dozen rows of bookshelves, I can almost see those approaching figures.

The restraint on my lower back shows no sign of loosening. I open my eyes slightly wider, and my tone finally becomes faster.

MC: Don't bully me, we won't make it in time…!

Lucien: (whispers teasingly) Really? But MC was obviously very bold when she taught me just now.

Lucien: Bold enough... to make me want to watch a bit longer, to see how far your experiment will progress.

As the words are spoken, the dark colors in my vision suddenly turn into a golden-red illuminated by sunlight. The footsteps that were close just a moment ago also disappear all of a sudden.

I snap back to reality and realize that the surroundings have turned into the rooftop at some point. I'm momentarily stunned and then realize that he has used Evol to take me away from the reference room.

The lush foliage reflects on Lucien's figure, and his eyes also flicker with changing light and shadow. His voice carries an unabashed smile.

Lucien: I thought you knew I wouldn't let anyone else see what you just did.

MC: (blushing) ...You, you did it on purpose!

Saying this, my tense shoulders finally relax a bit. I take a deep breath and suddenly remember something.

MC: They must have something to discuss with you, right? Will leaving like this affect their work?

Lucien: Don't worry. The final stage is just a continuation of the discussion, and there won't be any new issues to address.

Lucien: Compared to that, what's happening right now is even more important.

I blink my eyes and hesitantly open my mouth to speak.

MC: What you mentioned, could it be the experiment between us that hasn't yielded any results yet?

Lucien gazes at me without confirming or denying anything, moving closer in my direction. Without getting an answer, a kiss descends upon me without any hesitation.

It's as if the long-restrained emotions have finally found an outlet, his scorching lips moving passionately and entwining, and almost stealing all my breath away.

I have no choice but to part my lips, and the next second, Lucien takes advantage and delves even deeper, as if wanting to entangle and capture my tongue.

I find myself clinging to his neck, lifting my head as if surrendering to a hunter, feebly responding to this kiss.

Until I finally find a moment to catch my breath, I tilt my head away, struggling to open my mouth as if trying to gain more breathing space.

MC: Wait... this isn't scientific-

The embrace around my body seems to tremble. Lucien lifts his head, as if seeing through my intentions, his eyes filled with surprises and tinged with a sense of provocation. He shows me a rogue smile.

Lucien: ...Do we still need to discuss that experiment at this moment? Then let's continue.

Despite his words, he entangles me with a tidal-like kiss, voraciously devouring my words.

It seems like a layer of mist has clouded my vision, but I can't ignore the stirring of his fingers, so I can only beg softly for mercy.

MC: (blushing) I-I didn't mean to discuss…

Lucien: (whispers hoarsely) I told you before, giving up halfway is not a good habit, Miss Professor.

Lucien: So, make sure you let me hear it all, your judgments and conclusions…

With his words, his fingers press in as if punishing. I moan and my fingers clutching onto his solid back begin to tremble.

MC: (still blushing)....I-I remember that in the experiment, the variables need to progress continuously... to see more significant results.

MC: I-I haven't done anything now... w-why... why is it more... than when I just gave you "physical contact" earlier, I seem to be-

Lucien: Getting a stronger reaction?

Lucien takes over my words, and there seems to be a hint of amusement in his unsatisfied tone.

His deep breath comes close to my ear, and his fingertips teasingly dance around, then suddenly press in again.

Lucien: (whispers hoarsely) Because this Miss Professor hasn't considered the most core variable yet.

It’s as if fireworks are blooming in my depth, my heartbeat echoes with a humming sound. I pant a little, feeling a bit dazed, and open my mouth.

MC: ...And what is that?

A kiss that seems both like a reward and comfort lands gently on my lips.

Lucien: (exhales lightly and then whispers huskily) Your influence.

The flickering lights reflect in his glistening eyes as if trying to peer into my soul.

Lucien: "Lovers are like mirrors, reflecting their desires for each other."

Lucien: Every bit of my desire is tied with you.

Lucien: When you wish to explore the limits of my self-control, I'll be equally eager to satisfy your curiosity…

Lucien: Just like how I long to explore everything about you.

Lucien: But when you personally unlock this restraint named "self-control", naturally, I'll have even more desires.

His face looms larger in my field of vision. I tremble involuntarily, feeling his touch once again, accompanied by ambiguous whispers.

Lucien: (whispers lowly and hoarsely) ...Compared to seeking the result that we both unanimously don't care about... Right now, I'd rather immerse myself in every moment spent with you.

The kiss between our lips gradually deepens, and I involuntarily close my eyes. I feel like floating into the high clouds and falling into a soft marsh.

Every little gap in my consciousness is deeply imprinted with Lucien's traces.

In the hazy sunlight, it's as if I can hear his unfinished whisper.

Lucien: For example, in the present kiss.

[Lux's Ramble Corner]

For once I can actually see why it gets past the censor HAHA. Compared to the UR that's more explicit, PG is very careful with the kiss SP, using vague wording that can be interpreted innocently if you don't know the context😂 although you can also interpret MC's 'increasing variable' in the reference room as simply touching, or grinding against him; I think she was really moving up and down to f- him because her appearance also a mess and his finger slid very easily inside her until she reached the climax (the 'fireworks') in the rooftop garden ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). Besides, if they haven't met in a month and it's explicitly stated that they haven't properly f-ed since MC arrived in Granada, where else Lucien gets the scratch mark on his back if not in the reference room (ft. frustrated MC), right?

ALSO it’s mentioned that MC wears a long dress before she went into the reference room, see the how in the CG it gets rolled up lol. The angle of the CG is smart asf bc it hides their front appearance.

ANYWAY H-WORD ASIDE, this date is really good. I enjoy their dynamic as 'opponent' and their battle of wits. Although you can say that Lucien is 'winning', at the same time he said it himself that his desire is under MC's control and influence. If MC wants to continue the experiments he's more than happy to oblige (and surprisingly he has a *really* good self-control), but since she's kind of already given up then it's just natural that he also let go of his restraint. The choice ultimately will always be in her hand.

In the MQ there's a conflict between satisfying MC's (and his) curiosity and satisfying their longing for each other. It's evident from the way Lucien immediately books the earliest flight home and MC literally takes a flight to Granada just to meet him. The experiment started smoothly, but they clearly grew to miss each other again too, and they began caring less and less about the experiment.

Although Lucien can also stop the experiment, he still wants her to be the one to put it to a stop. Because, again, her desire is his, if she wants to explore him more deeply, he will oblige. But, still, since he also misses her, he also entices her to stop the experiment, either by purposefully leaving the ID card so she will meet him in the reference room, or by tying himself up while stripping 😂.

'However, he's so clever that even if I don't speak, he should be able to see my silent surrender, right? ...Then why doesn't he 'respond' to me quickly?'

Really? But MC was very bold when she 'taught' me just now.

Bold enough…. to make me want to watch a bit longer, to see how far your experiment will progress.

As she increases the variables, she eventually silently surrenders, thinking that they could enjoy more time together if it wasn't because of the experiment. I think Lucien noticed this too, but at that point, he was also curious to see how far she could go.

"Lovers are like mirrors, reflecting their desires for each other."

Still, this curiosity doesn't last long because, in the end, his desire is tied to hers. The experiment doesn't matter anymore because she unconsciously desires more to spend every moment with him and for him to respond to her rather than to really test his self-control. And because of this he also let go of his self-control, showing a greater reaction even if she hasn't done anything because that's what she desires.

I think that’s all from me? Just my take on the plot lololol. Hope y’all enjoy this date as much as I do~

#HELLOOOOO #is this worth the kiss sp? YEAH IT IS #put my rambling at the end bc i don't want to spoil much lol #mlqc lucien #mr love queen's choice #mlqc #mlqc translation #mlqc cn #mlqc spoiler #mlqc translations #love and producer #mlqc xu mo #xu mo

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