#yes i am obsessing over every tiny touch what of it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fuckmyskywalker · 6 months

Text

"Suffocating" — Luke Skywalker.

— CW: 18+, smut. Facesitting. Mommy kink. Tit sucking. Sub!Luke. | Word count: 0.9k (not proofread!)

— a/n: Like I said; I am physically uncapable of writing Luke without being a sub with a mommy kink an an obsession with tits.

— List of films! | Taglist.

Luke closes his eyes as he swirls his tongue over your nipple. The sensation of being cared for after such a long day was electric, making him shiver in pleasure from head to toe. He could even swear to the Maker he could feel the tension leaving his blood, replaced by waves of delight and adoration. Sucking slightly harder, he closes his eyes, teasing your body with tiny bites, moving his hand to cup your unattended breast.

“Do you like to suck on mommy’s tits?” You smile, brushing his blonde hair away from his face.

“Mmm…” He replies with his voice muffled against your skin. “Yes… Yes, I do.” A small pleased smile draws on his lips— this is something that he looks forward to after a long day or after a dreadful, tiring mission. It is intoxicating to lose himself in the warmth of your arms, being basked in your love and cherished without any expectations or demands.

‘Good boy.” You praise him, blowing him a sweet kiss. “Lay down for Mommy okay? I want to ride your face.”

Luke whispers, already blushing at the thought. “Oh… Okay.” A little overwhelmed by the attention but also incredibly aroused. Being dominated was something he never quite considered before— and it is not like he possessed a lot of experience before he met you. At some point he found himself surprised by the way his body reacted positively at the thought of being used for someone else’s pleasure. As you straddle him, inching your body closer to his face, his hands touch your thighs caressing the flesh lovingly; Luke sees you as nothing less than an angel sent from above just for him.

Positing himself properly on the bed, Luke takes a deep breath to steady his trembling hands that reach in between your thighs to spread your pussy. His blue eyes lock on the sight, amazed at the way your core glistens, as if it was begging for his attention—when he is the one who normally begs. Luke could barely control himself; he wanted to dive into you and taste you, feel you, please you, and please himself by pleasing you… but he has to be patient, and wait for your instructions, otherwise he will be punished. Just like you say ‘good boys deserve rewards’. Your eyes meet his for a moment, and the way Luke is silently praising you makes your knees buckle.

“Are you ready?”

Gulping nervously, he nods but it doesn’t seem to be enough for you. “I asked you a question.” You give his hair a warning tug, reminding him what happens when he doesn’t follow orders.

“I know, I… I was just…” He stammers as his heart threatens to beat out of his freckled chest. The anticipation and you tasting his patience are almost too much for him to handle. The hair tug was a simple reminder of who is in control here. “Yes Mommy” He breathes.

It was as if you were offering Luke a piece of heaven itself, and he couldn’t resist. His tongue reaches out, tracing the outline of your lips, feeling the warmth. You taste so sweet; a mixture of your natural scent mixed with the slight tanginess of your wetness urges a husky moan from his part, clear that he is enjoying every second of it. Hips begin to roll back and forth, grinding yourself against his lips while your thighs squeeze the sides of his head hard enough to suffocate him but not hard enough to make him struggle for air. This position feels raw, primal, and incredibly intimate, his poor little heart jolting pathetically with joy, experiencing an invisible connection between carnal bodies and lustful desires at a level that words couldn’t even begin to describe. Both overwhelmed and intoxicated with pleasure; Luke thrusts his tongue deeper inside you, trying to taste as much of you as possible. The tip of his nose bumped against your clit, rubbing it and stimulating the swollen nub provoking you to ride his face faster—harder.

Luke’s chin and lips were dripping with your sweetness and he was weak to that. The boy was working formidable to make you feel good and that is very much appreciated. Luke eats you with fervor, shaking his head side to side with his tongue flat against your clit, sucking it and sticking his tongue back inside your cunt, he seems desperate to explore every soft, moist inch of yours, to devour you, to taste every single part until he knew you better than he knew himself.

Every pulsation of your velvety walls is noticed by his tongue, and he knows you are about to come by the sound of your moans and your ragged breathing. “I’m gonna come—” There it is, what he is been working for; Luke mumbles something but it’s muffled by his mouth being full.

With your moans becoming louder, more desperate, his hips jolt without him realizing it, and he is unconscious of the way his cock is twitching and oozing precum, begging for attention. Riding his face becomes almost violent now, and yet Luke wasn’t even displeased or uncomfortable in the slightest. Calloused hands grip your thighs tighter as if he is afraid to let you go, pulling you impossibly closer to him, his mind absorbing and swallowing every drop you are granting him. Tasting every drop of your essence, Luke keeps the flavor etched into his memories— and he swears he will never find anything so sweet and addictive. Such orgasm makes your ears ring and close your eyes shut as your thighs quiver around his head.

But Luke wants more. He is an insatiable little brat.

“I love you” He whispers against your skin, licking your thighs and lapping at your wetness. “I want more.”

— 🐚 if you wish you be added to my taglist there's a google forms in the beginning of the post! There you can select which days you would like to be tagged in (or choose the option: all the above!). If you send me a DM or an ask I will tag you on every day! | some tags might not work due to your settings, so let me know!

#𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 anya writes!#𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪 kinktober 2023!#luke skywalker #luke skywalker smut #luke skywalker x reader #luke skywalker fanfiction #luke skywalker x reader smut #luke skywalker imagine

134 notes · View notes

maeleelee · 9 months

Text

Ask next time, yeah?

I wrote this for the wifey Kayla. She’s become obsessed with Yunho (which I’ve been telling her how perfect the man is since day one), so I wrote her a small little smut Drabble with the man himself. Have fun reading! ❤️

⚠️minors DO NOT interact ⚠️

Warnings: hand kink, size kink, yunho a little upset, pet names(kitten and pretty), fingering, p in v, breeding kink, markings, biting, counter sex, wall sex, yunho in his sugar daddy era 😂, if I missed any please let me know!

He could care less if you spent his money, damn half the time he wanted you to use his card but something told you as you walked in the door that he wasn’t having the best day

Y/n could see the look in his eye when they landed on her. “Have fun kitten?” He said, hissing a tiny bit.

“Yeah.. I umm, I had fun YuYu. You okay?” Y/n asked, testing the waters.

“What did you get, huh?” He looked at the bag she was holding.

“I umm. I got a sundress for the trip this weekend.” She bit her lip.

He took a step towards her. “Oh a sundress? My kitten wants to look pretty this weekend. Is that what it is?”

“Yunho. What’s wrong?” Y/n pouted.

“You didn’t ask this time. You didn’t even say hello when you went to take the card.” He moved closer to you.

“I didn’t think you’d care. You normally make me take it.” She sighed as she looked up at him. He towered her.

He raised his hand up and grabbed her chin. “Kitten. You go through me every single time. Do I make myself clear?”

She nodded. “Yes sir.”

“Awh my kitten can listen. Cute.” He nods to the counter. “Go sit on the counter for me.”

She does as told and tries her hardest to jump onto the counter. He knows she can’t get up there without help. He loves it.

“Need help kitten?” He smirked at her, chuckling when she nodded.

“ Please sir.” She pouted.

He walked over to her and wrapped his fingers around her waist, smirking when she whimpered lightly.

“What’s wrong kitten?” He asked her, faking a pout.

“Nothing. Sorry sir.” She slid back a tiny bit and looked at him.

“Why’d you want me on the counter?” She pouted at him.

“So I can have my way with you.” He smirked evilly. She slid back but his hands wrapped around her thighs. “No ma’am. Don’t make this harder on yourself, pretty.”

His grip was tight, making her whimper. He pulled her legs apart and smirked. “Wore a dress out today. It’s a pretty one for sure.”

“Thank you.” She whispered to him. “I wore it for you.”

“Oh you did? Well, I’m still not letting you get away with taking my card without asking me.” He growled into y/n’s neck.

He started kissing her neck, nibbling here and there. He slides his hand up her thigh and smiles as he feels her shaking a little. “What’s wrong kitten?”

“Nothing Yun. I just love your touch.” She whimpered as his hand continued moving up towards her cunt. “Please, please sir. I’ll do anything.”

“Anything?” He asked against her neck. She nodded her head fast. “Words kitten, or I’ll stop.”

“Anything sir. I swear.” He smirked against her neck and slid her closer to the edge of the counter. He flipped her before she could realize what was happening.

Her feet were barely touching the floor. She was on her tiptoes and he loved it. He loved how much smaller she was than himself. He placed his hand on her ass to “move” the dress up.

He landed a smack onto her ass and smirked at the yelp she let out. “Awh poor kitten.” He fake pouted. He pulled down her underwear and slid it into his back pocket. “Gonna make you feel so good, kitten. But remember, I own you. You are mine, do you understand?”

She whimpered out a small “I am yours” before he shoved his fingers into her cunt. She moaned loudly, trying to find her grip on the counter. He thrusted his fingers in and out, speeding up when she’d let out another whimper.

“Fuck you’re so tight.” He groaned, moving his fingers and curling them inside her. He removed his fingers, making her whimper. He gripped her hair and pulled her upright and smirked at her, the glare in his eyes, saying ‘don’t disobey me’.

“Open kitten.” He told her. She did as told and opened up, he wiped his fingers on her tongue. He pushed her back onto the counter and unzipped his pants, pulling out his cock.

“You look cute, bend over, feet barely touching the floor.” He groaned and pushed himself into her cunt. “Fuck kitten.” He groaned out. “So fucking tight against me. You feel so fucking good. Such a good girl for me too, taking me all, letting me ruin you over the counter.” He thrusted in and out, not stopping as he talked to her.

“I wanna ruin you. Teach you a lesson but I know you won’t learn from it. My whore likes the punishments I give her, doesn’t she?” Y/n couldn’t think straight, her hips hurt from the counter but fuck did everything feel so good.

“Kitten. Answer me or I’ll stop.” He growled.

“Yes sir. I love the punishments.” She whimpered. He sped up.

“Good to know.” He growled. “I’m gonna breed you like the slut you are. Gonna let everyone know you belong to me. Fuck kitten, you keep clenching. You like that idea? Me breeding you. Making you have my little ones. Fuck.” He came quickly after and smirked. He rode out his own orgasm and pulled out, making y/n cry out.

“Please no yunho. I’m so sorry sir. I’ll be a good girl please.” She was pleading and he loved when she did. He tilted his head. “Please sir.” She panted.

He picked her up and wrapped her legs around his waist. He got down the hallway and pushed her against the wall. “I love how much for a whore you are for me. My little slut. Taking me like she was made for me.” He pushed back into her and smirked as her head rolled backwards. “Imma fuck my cum into you and then cum in you again. Gonna make sure to breed you all nice and well.” He held her against the wall, repeatedly thrusting in and out, making her hit the hall each time. He bit down on her neck, making a teeth mark and then continued sucking and nibbling everywhere he could.

She started clenching around him and he groaned. “Cum kitten. Cum or you're not cumming the rest of the night.” She held onto his shoulders, nails digging deep, making him hiss. A few more thrusts and she was coming hard.

“Fuck you look so pretty coming around my cock.” He groaned, cumming again. “Gonna fuck a baby into you.” He mumbled against her neck. “Gonna have my babies.”

He stood there for a second, both breathing hard. “Are you okay?” He asked her. She smiled as she placed her hand on his cheek.

“I’m great, handsome.” She answered back. “However, I would like a bath.”

He smiled and kissed her lightly. He walked them to the bathroom, putting her on the counter and turned on the bathtub. “Think we have time for one more around?” He smirked at her as he watched the bathtub fill up with water.

“Baby. Fuck me again later. I just wanna soak.” She giggled, making him smile.

“Deal kitten.”

@cadenonlinelive @acrylishly @bunnyiix @mxnsxngie @imagine-a-life-like-this @babyboyquokka @littleleatabixx

(I know I’ve missed some people who like to be tagged but please forgive me. I’m posting this right before work and I’m running late now lol)

#ateez #yunho x reader #ateez yunho #jeong yunho x reader #yunho smut #yunho

127 notes · View notes

weskin-time · 1 year

Note

Jill or Carlos with a S/O that has autism or ADHD? Listening intently to their partners rants and rambles about their hyperfixations or stimming with them when they get too excited or their emotions get too strong

YES! i am on the spectrum so this made me so fucking happy to write you have no idea

Jill Valentine and Carlos Oliveira with an Autistic S/O HCs

i am. on pain medication from getting my wisdom teeth out today so im sorry if anything makes no sense or there are errors i am just vibing

Jill Valentine

she keeps a pair of ear plugs in her pockets when you two go anywhere just incase

loves to hear you infodump and stim after shes had a rough day. just loves to unwind at home while listening to your voice

and she’ll nod her head, hum in agreement and ask questions when you’re talking. never in a ‘im not fully listening’ she actually loves to see your eyes light up and the happy expression on your face when you talk about a hyperfixation or special interest

she was a little confused when you first visually stimmed but instead of asking you she just followed your movements which made you even more excited

if you get too excited about something where you’re starting to hyperventilate and you feel like you’re going to explode she will open the bedroom door and make you wiggle around on the bed. full body stim so good good yes

will get you little trinkets or gifts from the things you’re obsessed about to show how much she listens and cares

doesn’t mind cooking you your samefood over and over again, it gives her a chance to brush up on her cooking skills plus she loves to cook with you (she kinda sucks at it but it’s okay i love her so much *smooch*)

if you’re starting to get overstimulated in public she quickly learns the early signs and tries to get you away, or you could just tell her “i’m starting to get overstimulated here” and you’re out of wherever you’re at instantly. she can come back another time if there’s something she needs

she keeps every rock, flower, marble or what ever you bring her. she has old police books with pressed flowers you gave her, the rocks are in a jewelry box.

when you start to freak out and have a breakdown she’s sorta at a loss to help but in a split second she runs and grabs your weighted blanket and puts it around your shoulders while getting you your favorite drink. it all depends on you and how you deal but she’s quick to make adjustments

non verbal moments? she will help you make little cards to show your wants and needs and other information.

angry? ripped your shirt in anger? banged your head against a wall? tore some hair out? she will try to help you calm down as best she can and then patch you up. she’ll take safety pins and pin your shirt. she’ll give you an ice pack and some pain relief medicine. she gives you kisses

don’t like a certain texture? boom it’s gone. if you feel it still even after you’ve touched it she’ll bring you your favorite texture

loves it when you sit on her lap and rub your face on her like a cat. she will join you in the face rubbing

food textures you don’t like? give them to her she’ll eat them. don’t like mushrooms bc they’re squishy and weird and make you want to punch a man? she’ll give you a tiny fork to pick them off your pizza and she’s putting it on hers

Carlos Oliveira

he’s an adhd haver

autism and adhd solidarity

when he washes his hair it’s so soft and fluffy and thick that you could sit there and pet his head and rub your fingers thought it for hours. he doesn’t mind at all. he’s sitting there almost purring like a cat

vocal stim echo chamber

y’all can make sounds or words over and over again and just keep bouncing them off each other for hours no matter what you’re going

his beard is also very soft. he keeps very good care of his appearance so it’s not like super scratchy it’s a very good texture please rub your face against it once or twice before kissing his nose

this man can’t cook for shit. normally it’s take out. most of the time y’all develop a samefood at the same restaurant so you two must order the same place for weeks and just get the same food

WILL LAY ON YOU AND CRUSH YOU WITH HIS WEIGHT.!! he loves cuddles so much and now he’s getting cuddles and helping you? his new favorite cuddling position is him laying on top of you while you run your finger through his hair

He’s the one who goes into places and talks to the workers there for you if you need him too. want to order lunch but feeling not up for it to order? tell him what you want he’s got you <3

non verbal moments? he talks enough for the both of you honestly. he knows sign language so you two could take that way or he’ll use cards too. if you text him he will read out your text before responding lol

pillow fort movies/tv show/ video game nights. filled with all that good sensory shit and your favorite snacks and his.

he stims with you. every time. it’s involuntary on his part.

more than likely there is one texture he loves that you hATE. you hate velvet? the first time you come over to his place he had a velvet blanket on his bed.

stocks the fridge with his and your favorite food textures. he likes pudding and cottage cheeses textures

he’s better at preventing meltdowns or breakdowns before they happen than helping you during the act

you two bring each other things. he picked up his paperclip to throw it away but he gained emotional attachment to it and he’s giving it to you bc he doesn’t want to loose his new friend. has all the thing you give him in a shoebox under his bed for safe keeping

one of his favorite stims is running his callused hands up and down your softer skin at a medium pace. he starts out slow before speeding up a bit more. just placing his hand on your body and running it down before picking it up and putting it where he first started. loves if you do a ‘cat making biscuits’ stim on his body while he does that to you

#tezi post #ask!#resident evil #resident evil x reader #resident evil imagine #jill valentine imagine #jill valentine x reader #resident evil jill valentine #jill valentine #jill valentine headcanon #carlos oliveria #carlos oliveria x reader #resident evil carlos oliveria #carlos oliveira headcanons

348 notes · View notes

the-iceni-bitch · 1 year

Text

Got a Jealous Bone

Kinktober Day 14: Collaring

Relationship: mob!Lloyd Hansen x fem!reader (le grand homme and coquinette, Poison Paradise AU)

Words: ~1.2k

Summary: Lloyd needs everyone to know you’re his.

Warnings: explicit language, explicit sexual content (public sex, vaginal fingering, squirting, nipple piercings, mentions of unprotected vaginal sex), angry Lloyd, hints of crime doings, SMUT!!! 18+ ONLY!!

A/N: The man is drool worthy and so obsessively in love with his girl I can’t fucking stand it 🥵

I am no longer doing taglists so if you want to stay up to date on all the latest filth, follow my sideblog @the-iceni-library and turn on notifications!

Lloyd growled into his scotch as he watched the blonde hunk of muscle that was supposed to be standing at the door move even closer to you, ignoring the nattering of the asshole he should probably actually be negotiating with as he considered shooting the meathead in the face when he took your tight lipped smile for encouragement and tried to touch your arm. Just because he liked putting you in those tiny little dresses that could barely hold your tits, all these dicks seemed to think it was an open invitation for them to put their hands on you.

“Thank you, sweetie.” At least the dumb jock’s boss didn’t try to touch you when you set a fresh drink in front of him, but he didn’t try to hide the way his eyes lingered over every inch of you while you started to make your way back towards the chaise that Lloyd kept in his office especially for you. “What a pretty little doll, may just have to steal you away from this bastard.”

Lloyd’s jaw clenched and he saw your nostrils flare at the comment, narrowing his eyes when you huffed and fidgeted with your skirt in that way you did when you were frustrated. The sound of him clearing his throat caught your attention right before you sat down, your gaze snapping to his and warmth flooding your system when you saw the look of pure possession that was etched on his features.

“Viens ici, chaton.” Lloyd groaned softly when you slowly prowled towards him, setting his drink down and reaching out to grip your waist and yank you into his lap once you were close. “Andrews here thinks he can steal you from me, coquine. What do you think about that?”

“Mmm, I don’t like it, mon loup.” You leaned into his touch when his hands traced over your hips, purring when his touch slid between your thighs and resting your head on his shoulder as you pouted at him.

“Of course you don’t, ma nénette.” He tutted and kissed your temple before turning you in his lap so you were facing the two men who had offended him, spreading your legs wide over his thighs and dragging his hand up to cup your throat and play with the collar that was fastened around your neck. “Did you happen to notice this, Andrews?”

“Yes.” The man gritted his teeth as he watched Lloyd toy with you, it would be difficult to miss the massive diamond that was hanging from the plush band of black velvet and nestled at the hollow of your throat. “Why?”

“Oh, it’s just a little anniversary present I got for my sweet magpie, she just loves sparkly things.” Lloyd cooed when you arched into his touch when he started to pet you over the soft lace of your panties. “What does your collar say, chérie?”

“Ah, it says ‘property of Lloyd Hansen’.” You rolled your head to the side so you could moan into his neck when he gradually increased the pressure of his fingers, the soft fabric quickly growing sticky and creamy as you became more and more aroused. “Because I’m Daddy’s.”

“That’s fucking right, mon enfant gâté.” Lloyd purred into your ear before scowling at the two men who were starting to look marginally uncomfortable, their eyes finally moving away from you even when Lloyd gave your pussy a light smack and you let out an absolutely beautiful whimper. “All of you belongs to me, and I don’t remember giving either of these two assholes permission to look at my tits, or my pussy.”

“Hansen…”

“I’m not talking to you, bastard.” Lloyd licked your neck and slid the hand that wasn’t playing with your cunt up to drag the top of your dress down until your tits popped out, teasing the jeweled bars that ran through your nipples until you were squealing and wiggling in his lap. “Should I punish them, amour? You know how much I hate when anyone looks at you.”

“N-non, mon homme.” You shivered and whimpered into his mouth when he moved his lips back to yours, his long fingers dragging the fabric of your panties to the side then starting to teasingly swirl over your slit as you leaked cream all over the both of you, ignoring the two men who were looking at the ceiling as you gripped his bicep tightly. “No, just show them why I’m yours, daddy, you need the new territory.”

“Mmm, my clever girl, even when I’m about to make you squirt all over everything. Do not look at her, Andrews.” Lloyd snarled at him after giving you a swift kiss, plunging his fingers inside you and starting to fuck you with his hand even as he kept pinching and tugging on your nipples while you buried your face in his neck and moaned, your body arching into his hand as your core started to grow tighter impossibly fast under his touch. “Look at me. You too… whatever your fucking name is. You’re lucky my girl is in such a sweet mood or you’d be getting carried out of here in pieces and I’d still take your territory. So give me a good fucking deal and do it fast so I can spoil her like she deserves.”

Whatever they said next was drowned out by the sound of blood rushing in your ears and your own wails as you fell apart, your release gushing and squirting out of you and making a mess all over the floor while your cunt spasmed around Lloyd’s fingers as he kept driving them into you. You were barely aware of him biting your breasts and calling you his good girl before he let you sag against him, his fingers still gently petting your pussy once you had settled as his other hand slid up to cup your throat while he continued his discussion. As soon as you felt him start to toy with your collar again, you couldn’t help but purr, making soft and pleasant noises against his skin while you curled up in his lap and wound your arms around him, trapping his hand between your thighs as you dozed off.

Lloyd smiled softly when he felt your warm breath fanning over his neck while you kept letting out sleepy little kitten noises, rubbing his cheek against your hair as he teased his fingers under the plush velvet of your choker as he finally got the idiots out of his office and turned his full attention back to you. He cooed when you whined as he stood up to carry you back to the chaise, laying you down gently and pressing kisses all over your neck and shoulders as he peeled your dress off the rest of the way and stretched his body next to yours as he grabbed one of the files August had left for him.

“Shhh, mon joli chaton, you rest, amour.” He kissed your hair when you murmured at him as you curled closer, trailing his fingers over your side lazily while he started to read. “Always so tired when you come for an audience, take your little kitty nap and then I’ll fuck you right on the conference table in nothing but your pretty collar during the next meeting.”

#natalie writes #natalie’s kinktober 2022 #kinktober 2022 #poison paradise #le grand homme and coquinette #lloyd hansen #lloyd hansen x female reader #lloyd hansen fanfiction #lloyd hansen x fem!reader #lloyd hansen smut #lloyd hansen x y/n #lloyd hansen x you #lloyd hansen x reader #chris evans #chris evans smut #chris evans character #eighteen and over #eighteen plus

282 notes · View notes

childotkw · 1 year

Note

Literally wanted to ask you have you seen HOTD and accidently went to your likes and found something much better. I knew if someone is going to understand my new found obsession with Aemond and Lucerys, it would be you🤣.

Oh man OH MAN do not kick this off my darling - I am barely stopping myself from going absolutely feral over those two😭😭

I have so many thoughts. So many emotions. It's hitting all my buttons and I am screaming.

It's the decade-long obsession. It's the resentment. It's the delicious parallels and yet gapping differences. It's the long, unbroken stares and snide, mocking smirks shared over that damn table.

It's Lucerys occupying Aemond's thoughts every time he sees his reflection, every time the scar on his face pulls when he speaks, frowns or even breathes. It's ten long years of bone-deep need that morphs and changes until Aemond doesn't even know what he wants from his nephew anymore beyond having Lucerys there, right in front of him, within touching distance.

And it's that tiny, dark little part of Lucerys that knows that he lives under his uncle's skin in a way no one else could ever replicate - and enjoys it.

I already have an AU idea that I don't dare to write because it'd consume me. I am shaking from the dynamic between them.

(And yes, I personally love the idea of slightly dark, unhinged Lucerys, no you can't change my mind.)

#anonymous #HOTD #lucerys velaryon #aemond targaryen #lucemond #even as a platonic relationship #fuck me it hits all the good dark tropes

133 notes · View notes

aprillikesthings · 1 month

Text

I think I finally have the energy for more rewatch

We're on the home stretch now folks

*cries*

s5 ep9 An Ill Wind

Me when I started doing this nearly two months ago: oh my god I can't do this for every episode it'll take me MONTHS to watch them all I want is to refresh my memory of the show enough to write my damn fic

Me now, having done this for Yes, Every Fucking Episode: I'm not ready for the show to be over ;_; Also I am devastatingly obsessed with Catra and learned I have a specific kink I didn't know the name of before and I keep practicing eyeliner like every night so I can cosplay Catra :D

ahahahah oh god

also from here on out I am going to not read the synopses

(I didn't do that for most of the episodes anyway tbh)

Glimmer can teleport relatively far distances with multiple people again but Catra is NOT a fan

also they're toUCHING

Adora, looking into the woods: hey come look at this

Catra: *still suppressing puking from some form of motion sickness caused by teleportation*

oh they find the empty torn up camp

Glimmer: maybe they went to Bright Moon or Mystacor? Catra: dude you know they could all be chipped so maybe we should be careful Glimmer: oh you don't trust princesses? Adora: Catra's right Catra: *grins in satisfaction*

just look at her

the fuckin. lack of subtlety here. as always. *chef's kiss*

("ugh they didn't HAVE to be so obvious don't you think it's Too Much" listen I've literally seen people who've watched Arcane be surprised to find out that people are shipping Vi and Caitlyn. "Really? I didn't think that was romantic." You didn't? Did we watch the same fucking show??? The one where those two have romantic tension so thick you could carve it with a KNIFE? The one where they had an overdramatic breakup scene in the rain even tho they hadn't kissed or anything? The one where they lay on Caitlyn's bed and talked about Vi's past while making significant eye contact and holding hands and Caitlyn pet Vi's face? That scene where they hug on the bridge and Vi does that like, face pet thing before walking off and they're clearly both in AGONY at being separated?! Are you really that fucking oblivious??? Jesus H Christ. Yes She-Ra made it SUPER OBVIOUS because some people are BAD AT PICKING UP THIS SHIT also She-Ra is aimed at kids and they haven't learned subtlety. Arcane was aimed at adults.)

no really I've seen people express surprise that people think they're going to be a couple. when that ^ was after they'd known each other like two hours

(seriously tho, if you can handle violence (there's a LOT ngl, it is not a show for kids) then you should watch Arcane, the people who make it have made it pretty clear that it's gonna be canon, and the next season is out in November; but also leaving shipping aside it's just REALLY, REALLY GOOD)

ANYWAY back to other animated lesbians

lol Glimmer teleports them all again without warning and Catra really does look like she's gonna hurl

And Erelandia ain't looking so good, oops

(but also yes Adora helped Catra up again)

intro is the same as the last episode

AHAHAH a dozen planets are rebelling against Horde Prime he's so pissed. And they apparently all mention She-Ra

yeah I am again surprised at how much of the actual plot I forgot lol (but I remembered that Glimmer liked to sneak into the kitchen to eat cake with her hands. Y'know. Important things.)

given his tiny facial reactions I think that's Hordak-Hordak. Our Hordak. Not the Wrong Hordak. I think.

once again I ask myself: where did y'all get those outfits

Entrapta teaches Wrong Hordak how to wink and it's so cute. I also love that she explains what it means--because I'm sure she had to consciously learn it, too: "It signals unspoken intent behind my words. In this case, our mutual deception of the Horde. Now you try."

awww

but yeah everyone in town is terrified and won't talk to them, and especially doesn't want to talk about any princesses

"should I buy property here?"

"...go team."

C'MON THAT WAS FUNNY, GUYS

Also, note to self, Melog definitely understands human speech--they split up, Catra is told to stick with Entrapta and Melog (and Catra frowns at this, just barely) and Adora tells Melog to keep them safe and it does a little noise of affirmation. (wait is Melog a he or a she or a they?)(fan wiki says it's an it but dang I feel weird using "it")

Okay so the scene where Glimmer, Adora, and Bow hide in a shop and then end up arguing with the shopkeeper is like, fascinating on multiple levels

Because on the one hand: I can't blame the townspeople for just keeping their head down and trying to get out alive. On the other hand, reporting them to the Horde isn't cool; they could just pretend not to be suspicious of these guys; there are in fact lots of places on the spectrum between "actively collaborating with one's oppressors" and "mounting a full-scale armed rebellion."

But on the other other hand I also think it's interesting that Adora's the only one of the three who's like "nah dude just let these people live their lives omg," something about Adora having lived in an oppressive environment for her whole childhood maybe

poor Adora someone get her an ibuprofen

Anyway Spinerella found them ack

Also Melog steals an apple for Catra, just magically takes it from someone's basket and into Catra's hand, which implies they're communicating non-verbally more than just moods, though I suppose "hungry, that apple looks good" is a mood

speaking of things that would make ANYone motion sick--

(Adora is saying it) Catra's right there, dude. You spent the last four seasons fighting her. lol.

Oh I paused it too soon lol Catra says this line:

LOLOL

Back on Horde Prime's ship, Hordak keeps looking at the chip thing Entrapta gave him and gets caught by Prime, whoopsie

oh hey, lore: Horde Prime can't access ALL the memories in his previous bodies without going into them, and he keeps his old bodies around in that green goo, that's fucking weird and gross, anyway he plugs a connection into his old body

Horde Prime: "The First Ones sought a new source of power of ancient worlds. Why? Why bend themselves to the whims of magic and myth?"

Poor Hordak has flashbacks to Entrapta and the Fright Zone. Mostly Entrapta. Including a moment of her looking at him fondly--I think it's the moment when she says "Imperfection is beautiful."

Horde Prime: "The fools took their secrets with them when they died. But I will find another way."

(I've seen a fan discussion suggest that there aren't actually any First Ones left--that when Light Hope made it so Adora came through the portal, the portal itself went back in time. I like that explanation in part because it means in my fic I don't have to figure out why Adora doesn't go looking for her birth family. Which tbh most fic-writers don't worry about anyway lol.)

Back with the rebellion, poor Catra is once again trying not to lose her lunch because they've all teleported.

And Netossa is like WTF IS THAT BITCH DOING HERE

Melog doesn't like that

Adora: "It's a long story, but she's with us now" Netossa: "...really??" (Catra in the background: hisses)

BAHAHA and then Netossa spots Wrong Hordak and they have to explain, no that one's with us, too 😬

But yeah p much the entire rebellion has been chipped except like Netossa and Perfuma

Adora and Bow have a guilt trip about having been gone for so long (...to rescue the queen! and also Catra)

and Catra's remembering what it's like to be chipped :(

Glimmer gives them all a ra-ra little speech

Adora just makes the sword appear in her hand without transforming lol that's cool

but they're doing the "I'm in" "yeah me too!" thing and

like, on dates?

(lol)

yayyy

Anyway the team heads back to Erelandia and starts kicking some ass

there's a great moment when Catra's like "you go deal with Spinnerella we'll take care of the bots" and Adora says "be careful" and Catra grins and says "always am!" like ma'am that is a LIE

Spinnerella is torturing some poor villager, and Netossa is worried her wife isn't still "in there"

Adora would know. From literal, personal experience. ;_;

She transforms into She-Ra and Netossa literally does a whistle of appreciation and says, "New look?" and She-Ra grins back. And somehow that is, like. Super queer. Like literally just one lesbian to another, in a flirty-but-not kinda way. Like I have *had* those interactions, where the underlying meaning is "I know we're each in a relationship, so I'm not actually hitting on you; but as one queer woman to another I want you to know that I see what you're putting out there and I like it." It's one of the best things??????

Netossa gives a little speech to Spinnerella about how she loves her and Spinnerella actually comes back for a few seconds ;_; but then she's gone again, but She-Ra and Netossa convince her to disappear for a while at least? And the locals rejoice.

And Catra would know. ;_; (She rubs the back of her neck after saying this.)

Anyway word gets back to Horde Prime that She-Ra is back on Etheria :D and he's so fucking pissed he's going to go there

...and Hordak spends a long moment looking at that chip from Entrapta again

They go to where the rebellion is actually hiding out, Glimmer and Catra recognize it

and I'M BLANKING ON WHY THEY'RE REACTING THIS WAY HELP seriously I have spent like ten minutes trying to figure it out, I don't think they talked about it while on Horde Prime's ship? Fuck!! IF YOU KNOW PLZ TELL ME

Any Perfuma ties them up and makes sure they're not chipped and then it's Happy Reunion Time with everyone :D

Adora to Catra: it's time for you to meet everyone Catra: are you sure??

I got that one without trying I didn't know it was coming lololol I was trying to get a shot of Catra looking hopeful

poor thing

Adora: long story but she's with us now!!!

Adora (well, as She-Ra) gives them all a little pep talk

ANNND EPISODE OVER

and I don't have time to do another one tonight and I won't have time tomorrow until like after 6:30pm aaaaaaugh

ON THE UPSIDE I only work two days this upcoming week.

Because it's Holy Week. I'm going to be in church like every day starting Wednesday and twice a couple of days ahahaha including an hour in the middle of the night on Thursday.

It is DEEPLY HILARIOUS to me that I'm going to end up watching the last episodes of She-Ra mere days before Easter. Like I literally have four left. Assuming I watch one tomorrow, I could end up watching the next one Tuesday night and watching the last two BEFORE GOING TO CHURCH ON WEDNESDAY how tf am I gonna focus for SHIT lolol

#april rewatches spop #an ill wind

8 notes · View notes

kyinpeachichu · 8 months

Text

Lyney and Lynette headcanons and imagines because I am head over heels and obsessed with them rn-

=================

Teeny tiny note: I will be writing dynamics and mostly on Lynette being a cat girl and how these two live together.

If anything sounds too 'shippy' just tell me and I'll remove it. That or you interpret it wrongly and don't know what it's like to actually love your sibling. (I have a sibling)(I actually do love her...)

=================

I still don't get how Lyney is human and Lynette a cat girl but genetics are weird I guess.

Then again Lyney still has his own little connection to cats so maybe it just runs in the family.

Whenever Lyney is sick, Lynette handles the situation calmly enough. She goes to get medicine and takes care of him whenever she can. She acts like she isn't worried but Lyney can see right through her.

She actually cares alot. One time, Lyney woke up to see her crying on his bedside.

Whenever Lynette is sick.... Lyney is ready to make SACRIFICES.

Cancel every show, spend any amount to get her the best medicine, send her to the hospital-! (That is until Lynette insists that this can be treated at home)

Is secretly panicking. But whenever he sees that she's getting better, it always makes him immensely happy.

Yes they can spend time away from each other but they have severe separation anxiety.

As a cat girl respectively, Lynette will have heat cycles every now and then.

Lyney is always eager to help with this. Whether it's by giving her herbs and tea to help calm her down, or give her as much privacy as she needs. Always checks in on her, never judges. Gives her hugs if she ever needs them, and maybe a kiss on the forehead when he's really worried about her.

Whenever the other has nightmares or has trouble sleeping, they're welcome in each other's rooms.

Lyney knows not to touch Lynette's kitty features. But whenever he does do it on purpose, it's always in a teasing fashion.

They are cute. They are popular, as such they earn themselves a good bout of admirers here and there.

Whenever a guy tries hitting on Lynette Lyney is quick to the rescue. That is unless he actually sees that Lynette is enjoying the company. Even so he's keeping a very watchful eye.

Whenever Lyney gets hit on... Lynette abandons him. Even when he's asking for her help, what could she do? She just huffs and watches in amusement.

But if she overhears a few girls actually thinking of going out with her brother, she's quick to step up and give them warnings. And proceeds to drive the maidens away if she doesn't think they are worthy.

"you sure about going out with my brother? Y'know, he snores alot."

Lyney is the one who spends their money on clothes for them.

"Look at this dress Lynette! Wouldn't you look adorable in it?" / "Isn't that kinda pricey?" / "No price is too high for my sister to look her best~"

Lynette has to bonk him into not spending too much of their money.

Card games. Card games. Card games.

Occassionaly Lyney would find himself staring at how expressive Lynette's tail is. But he's quick to avert his eyes whenever she might catch him looking.

They do each other's make up.

#lyney #lynette #lynye and lynette #genshin impacy #random #imagines #random thoughts #headcanons #genshin impact #genshin headcanons #catgirl #siblings #twins #i am obsessed

22 notes · View notes

judgeanon · 9 months

Text

Plastic Skies of Betrayal - Model 12: F-5E Tiger II “Area 88″

So this model is a little special. I know I said the same thing about the last one, but while the Raptor build came with a heavy dose of anxiety and frustrations, the next build turned out to be a nice planetary alignment of materials and people all coming together in an incredibly rewarding project. Just like the Raptor, however, talking about it involves talking about other things first. In this case, a late 70s manga that set up camp in my brain months ago and refuses to leave.

Have you ever heard of AREA 88? If not, you’re about to.

So there’s this plane called the Northrop F-5 Tiger II, which I’d actually never heard about until I played Ace Combat 5: The Unsung War. That game famously starts you off in an F-5 and locks you there for the first four or five missions, so I became pretty well-acquainted with this tiny little fighter. Some people might recognize its shape from the original TOP GUN, where it was painted black and used as a stand-in for Russian MiG planes, but on the other side of the Pacific, a lot of people know it best as one of the signature planes of one Shin Kazama.

Shin is the protagonist of AREA 88, a manga by Kaoru Shintani that started all the way in 1979 and ended in 1986, the same year TOP GUN came out. I first heard about it while looking at some model kits, and since I was (and in a lot of ways still am) elbows deep in fighter jets at that time, I started to dig a bit deeper. Three OVAs and half a manga series later, I was absolutely hooked. The air combat is fantastic and the manga pulls a bunch of incredible visual tricks to render it, but it’s the intense melodrama of the characters that really kept me in. It’s a tremendously engaging, compelling and interesting series from every angle. And funny enough, I’d actually seen it once, over a decade ago. Just not as a manga or as an anime.

As it turns out, AREA 88 had a videogame for the SNES that had been brought to the West as “UN SQUADRON”, and I had actually played it back when my computer was so underpowered that all I could play were emulated retro games. Running into the game’s source material again in the midst of a wild craze triggered by another videogame was a strange but fun little return, and along with my growing obsession with said source material, cemented my decision to make my next model AREA 88-themed. And the universe seemed more than happy to provide.

My current favorite hobby shop turned out to have a 1/72 Tiger II model for a very nice price, made by the same company that made the F-16 model I’d built some months ago. To make things even better, it was also the exact same kit I’d already seen a much better hobbyist than me turn into Shin’s plane and upload tons of great reference pics online. All I really needed would be the decals, so I asked the shop’s owner if he could get me in touch with someone who prints customs decals. He obliged, although in the end that wouldn’t be necessary.

The build itself was pretty sweet, although not without its hiccups. There was no family drama to distract me this time nor lingering feelings of guilt. Even money was no longer an object. Feeling more relaxed than usual, I took my time with it, and challenged myself to add a few extra touches. For example, taking the thinnest brush I have, dipping it in red paint and giving the stick a little button,

The other thing I also tried out was, for the first time, primer. Yes, I’m a dummy. Yes, I’m not sure how I got this far without it. But I’d never actually needed primer before until disaster struck and some patches of paint began to fall out of my Raptor model kit. I’m still not sure what caused it exactly, but priming models from now on seemed like the smartest solution. As we say down here, better to prevent than mend.

That said, I don’t think I fully understand this whole priming thing yet. Without an airbrush or a spray can, I just used a brush to coat the kit with it, right off the bottle. I’m not sure if this is a good way to use it but at least it smelled really good. And not in a thick chemical kind of way, just genuinely sweet smell. But anyway...

Painting had to be paused for a moment after I let a friend borrow my white paint, so for a week or so only the Tiger’s tail saw any paint, but once I had everything back things moved pretty quickly. I was a bit worried about the blue part since masking tape and me don’t see eye to eye. Still, it worked out alright, and any imperfections were quickly corrected with a bit more paint. Which is something I really appreciate in model-making: if you mess up, you can usually paint over it. Usually.

Like with the stick, I took the time to paint a few other little details like the position lights. Decals and weathering also worked out pretty well, thanks to HobbyBoss’ decals being really good and the plane itself being really small compared to the last couple ones I’d made.

The other thing I felt quite proud of was my paintjob on the transparent parts. I’d been scared of canopies for so long that a bunch of my first models are still purely transparent there, but thanks to a couple of really comfortable brushes and some experience, I’m feeling far more confident about it nowadays. Plus, I’d fallen in love with this shade of blue, so adding more to the plane was its own reward. And speaking of canopies, another little touch I’ve been adding to the planes since the Raptor is to give the whole thing a coat of matte varnish, but then use gloss for the canopy, giving it a nice shiny finish. Although that led to a moment of anxiety when a drop of varnish went inside the canopy and stayed there, giving it a very ugly thick white curve that I feared was permanent. In the end I went to sleep and woke up to the varnish having completely dried out and disappeared, so that’s a good life lesson: sometimes you just need to sleep things off.

So with that and a combination of black and gray panel liner, the Tiger was done! ... or was it? After all, this wasn’t just any Tiger, this is supposed to be Shin Kazama’s Tiger. It was still missing a couple of very important touches. But for the time being I was pretty damn satisfied with the model, top to bottom.

A couple of weeks passed and I never really got around to contacting the guy I’d been recommended, but then I ran into something interesting: a local hobbyist in our local version of eBay was offering custom display bases for model kits at a pretty affordable price. I’d been thinking about getting or even making a humble display base for pictures and stuff, but when I noticed that he was offering custom touches, an idea came to my mind. And that idea lead to a frankly pretty amazing moment of pure human connection.

So after I got paid, I reached out to the guy and asked about getting a 1/72 base made with some extra touches. First, he asked for a picture of the model I wanted to go on the base, so he could take some measurements. Feeling pretty proud of my work so far, I sent him a picture...

... and I swear, the very first thing he said was, and I quote:

“Oh, is that Shin Kazama’s F-5 from Area 88?”

To which my answer was “Ok, that simplifies matters.”

On top of immediately understanding the assignment, new friend even offered to throw in a little extra: a Shin Kazama scale figurine, free of charge. I said yes, of course, ‘cause momma didn’t raise the kind of fool that says no to free stuff, and also asked if he knew anyone who could help me with the decals. As it turned out, he did know a guy. And the combined efforts of three different people living nearly 400 miles away from each other all came together to make something that makes me incredibly happy.

Like everything else I’ve made so far, it’s not perfect. The tail decal couldn’t be easily printed in transparent paper, so it was printed on blue paper that’s ever so slightly a different shade than the one on the plane. But the results are still more than good enough for me.

In the end, this kit turned out to be a very welcome de-stresser. The difficult parts turned out to be a lot less difficult than it seemed, and the base and decals story is something I know I’ll always talk about with a smile on my face. In a hobby that’s usually pretty solitary, that little bit of long-distance camaraderie went a long way. And left me a very nice base for all future projects.

#My Stuff #Hobbies #Journals #Area 88 #F-5 Tiger II #Lovely human beings #Being nice to each other

29 notes · View notes

nyan-koii · 3 months

Note

I have a confession .. I’ve been obsessing over Seb’s body so much 😭😭 specifically these shots are so..

My reviews of the pics :3

1. first of all the shirt - too big and almost down to his elbows. It is like pressed against his stomach so it’s FLAT and legs and arms are soo tiny 😭😭 like little pookie get off that football field y need to be in bed w mark and Jense rn

2. .. no words honestly he’s just so tiny and manhandable. Like I can just imagine Seb just being moved around by the mechanics, being in the way unknowingly and they just wrap their hands around his entire upper arm and picks him up and moves him idk. Like the mechanics groping him and like just touching him makes my brain go brrr. Also anyone on the 2010 grid with big hands like Fernando, Robert, ofc mark and Jenson just like moving him around and finding out just how tiny he is and UGHHH

3. IH MY GODDDD his arms are soo fucking tiny compared to Mark’s and I can’t like formulate words.. like it’s half the size of his. Idc if it’s the angle or not that man is a TWINK and he needs to be fucked and grabbed and chocked and-

Also just imagine someone covering Seb’s ENTIRE body part with their HAND. Like .. he would malfunction and cum in his pants. Probably like whimper and just like die on the spot or something

Td;lr

Rbr seb is tiny and needs to be fucked until he can’t speak

(I can’t believe I’m sending this unanon but :,) ye)

HIIIII TRASHTEENKIDD (idk what to call you lmaoo 😭)

THE PHOTOSSS OMGGG THOSE PHOTOSS !!! I ONLY SEEN THE SEBMARK ONES BUT THE OTHER TWO OMFG,,, I MOANEDDDD

1. YESS !!! look at the size of the shirt its not made for his size or is he into larger shirt that can cover his body because well um 😏 you know why, he likes the feeling of being small??? Mhmmm the way the shirt covers his butt too AND YESS his tiny legs and armss seb youre not supposed to be there indeed ! Get your ass on the bed now !! Also i love how red his ears are ngl. I think most of the time its always red which make me think if its like that on the other parts too 🤭 imagine him all flushed up and redd oooooo what a sight actually i need him...

2. AURGGHG PLEASE YOUR WORDS IM HAVING BRAIN DISEASE OVER IT. EXTREME HEADACHEEEE i always like the idea of the crew gangbanging on seb especially during his torro rosso eraa !! The boy is so so petite you can carry him everywhere and its as light as a feather ! Want him to be handled like a ragdoll every single second. Also the fact that he arrives at the grid first and is the one who usually leaves the last because he wants to hang around and 'learn' more from the crew.... doesnt that make you think thoughts???? Because i sure as hell do ! Insane honestly, GET HIS ASS RESTRICTED HES GOING TO GET PREGNANT GUYSS

like look at these 😭😭😭😭 HES SOO EASY TO BE PICKED AROUND !!! The mechanics would definitely also manipulate him during sebs str era im insane i need to be put at a hospital.... i want more gangbang seb fics...

And yes definitely 🤭🤭 the 2010s grid is using seb as a free cumdump as repayment for letting him win the wdc hehehheheheheh seb you're completely tangled yourselves with evil men, get out of thereee (dont)

HE ISS TINYYYYYYYYYYY HES SOO OMFGGG YOU CANT SEPARATE TINY AND SEB NO NU UH THEY LITERALLY CAME IN PAIR EVEN IF ITS AM SEB !!! THATS A TWINK

Sebs amazing for putting up a brave attitude around mark like if they got in a fight, mark would definitely beat him to a pulp but seb knows mark cant do ANYTHING to him, knows that seb has more power than him and in some cases marks just too tired to reciprocate his energy. Sebs taking marks kindness and manipulating it to his own likings for example mark fucking and releasing his anger on seb because he hates the german boy so much but its actually what seb wants, to be used and to see mark crumble in front of seb aauuurghhhh, hes a twink but hes an EVIL twink.

Also... look at michael's thigh.... its the same size as sebs waist..... im completely normal about this

Sebs definitely sensitive to touches too mhmmm !! Sensitive and desperate to be touched at all time its embarassing because he cant live without receiving physical touches from his boyfriends. During day, he finds comfort in their hand but at night, its the only thing he prays about while they continue to bring him close to heaven.

Yesss rbr seb, seb in general, deserves to be fucked until he cant think straight anymore. Much like those anime hentais, i want seb to be fucked until theres love in his eyes and hes all drooling in pleasure 🥰 my love language actually.

And dont pressure yourself ! I admire your bravery reallyy for not anon-ing yourselff. Its good to see who im talking to and that i know you guys are comfortable to share these thoughts with me 🙏 keep em coming guyss !! This is a safe place for everyone <3

#anon tells #or is it trashteenkid tells ?#it'll be good for me to know what can i call you thoo !#but thats up to youu #seb #seb my beloved #hes so small....#this one really makes me rethink all my life decisions #like it got me sit straight up on my bed at night #my roommate gave me a weird look but she knows what im dealing with lmaooo #get yourself someone who doesnt judge you for your likings #i love sharing nasty thoughts with people and im glad theyre accepting towards me #im glad that you guys can talk to me tooo yippeee #lets sexualise seb more 🙏#seb save us seb...

8 notes · View notes

fuckmeyer · 1 month

Note

I’m certain this is over 500 words but I am dying to hear more about all of this. I genuinely tried to cut but I could not make up my mind - silk tie anon (still workshopping the name here, not sure I want to be know for Edward’s clothing/buns all that bad):

Edward had threaded one hand through my hair and was mindlessly curling strands around his finger, sweeping them off my shoulder, bringing them to his lips. My nails traced mindless patterns on his other hand wrapped around my waist.

The intimacy and burn of his fingers on my skin made me remember with striking emotion how much I missed him touching me, how starved I was.

We breathed in unison. Every other moment, a faint static would pulse down my body. At first, I thought it was him flinching, but it was rhythmic and soft. Like was responding to me. Like our bodies were syncing up. In a good way.

I sighed. “I wish it could be like this all the time.”

He caught my hand in his and brought the back of it to his lips.

“Em’s obsessed with carbon-neutral cabins now,” said Edward. “I should ask him to build us one.”

I could practically hear the smile on him.

Usually, I would balk and respond along the lines of No way, Jose.

Cactus Bella would’ve, anyway.

“That’d be nice,” I said. Edward hmm’d in response, just as surprised by my reaction as I was. “We could watch the sunset every night. It’d have to have a tiny art studio, though. With a view.”

“Yes. Art studio in the attic, recording studio in the basement.”

“And a library.”

“The rest of the house is a library. Every room has at least one floor-to-ceiling bookshelf.”

“And we could decorate and hang up pictures. And we’d never pay rent.”

“And I would make tea for you every morning and dinner for you every night. We would stay there for weeks at a time.”

“Months.”

“Years.”

“Forever.”

“Forever,” he echoed. It sounded off.

The sun dropped into the horizon.

“Twilight, again,” I remembered him saying at prom. “No matter how perfect the day is, it always has to end….”

At prom, it had sounded romantic.

Here, it haunted me.

We didn’t speak. Only dying birdsongs and classical music filled the silence.

Before he could wallow in his forever comment, I asked, “So what's on the menu for tonight?” gesturing with my head to the tiny stereo. “Wagner, to celebrate my being done reading that freak Nietzsche?”

“Hah hah. As if this was remotely Wagnerian.” For a moment he tensed underneath me; his faltering chuckle returned. “I was wondering when you’d say something. What do you think?”

It was the smoothest-sounding music I’d ever heard—that’s what I thought. Every note was correct and on key and on beat and every instrument played with exact preciseness. It felt more like the whole song was just one fluid, resonating harmonic note to the next. A dream. A fantasy.

What set it apart were the colors. They jumped off the track. Purples and orangey-yellows, mostly, but the piano sounded like the greenest grass Forks had ever grown.

“Unedited thoughts only,” he warned me.

“You know what it reminds me of?” I said, patting his knee. “Debussy. With a little Emile Pandolfi zhuzh to it. Or like if Rachmaninov woke up one day and decided to write something a little more understated.”

“Classical influences with modern touches.”

“Exactly.”

“Dramatic?”

“In good way. Y’know? Not so cloying and loud.”

“Calmer.”

“Yeah. Less struggle. If that makes sense.”

“Interesting.” He tried keeping an even face but his eyes lit up. He nuzzled his face into my collar. “But the real question: do you like it?”

“Hell yeah. That’s my biased opinion. You know I like your recs.”

“Except Bobby Vinton.”

“Fifties trash,” I said with a dismissive shrug, “what can you say?”

“I’d say your taste in men is better than your taste in music, and that’s not saying much.”

His voice was jovial—and false.

—No, not false.

Shaken with a sheepish nervousness. Embarrassment?

I laid back against his chest. Puzzle pieces assembled in my head, so loud and clear I would assume he could hear me coming to my conclusions.

Edward was nervous.

All night, he’d been nervous.

The good kind of nervous.

“Okay,” I said. “I’ll bite. Tell me.”

Laying against him, I could feel excitement coursing through him.

“Hm?”

“There’s a speech you’re not telling me,” I said. Edward broke into a smile but looked down so I wouldn’t see it. The anticipation he carried with him felt like live wires on my skin. “You’re dying to say it. Mhm. Something overwrought. Or some super nerdy, esoteric lecture, I bet. Yeah. The blues speech. The classical music. There’s a theme going on here.” He laughed. “Tell me. Who’s this dead guy and why do I care?”

“The tongue on you.” His lips kissed my temple, tickled the shell of my ear when he spoke. “That dead guy is me, thank you very much.”

“Huh?” I whipped around to face him with an open-mouthed smile. “No way.”

“Yes, way. Wrote and performed.”

“This? Really? You wrote this? Really?” As I talked, I moved to straddle him, my hands on his shoulders, the side of his neck. Brassy golds and jewel-toned purples swirled through the music drifting between us. “That’s so cool!”

This, like everything else about Edward, seemed otherworldly in its grace and beauty. It felt like listening to the future of music—refined to an even higher degree of perfection.

Of course this was his.

“Is it so hard to believe?”

"Eloquent as always."

"This is amazing work. Wow!” It felt like I radiated so much joy, my cheeks burned. “Congratulations, oh my god. It’s great. It’s brilliant. I take back all the ‘dead guy, don’t care’ stuff. Lecture me up.”

“You assume I have more to say?”

Getting Edward to share any of his compositions had been, up until now, impossible. He had informed me several times he hadn’t written anything since the 1970s. Any time I’d ask, he’d just come up with some medley of songs by others, or he’d improvise.

“It’s a lullaby.” Beat. “Your lullaby.” Another beat. “I wrote it for you.”

I blinked. Stilled.

“For me?” My hand fell back to his chest, leaving his hair a wild, sculpted mess. Edward watched my face fall and eyes drift toward the speaker; his brows knit. “A lullaby? For me?”

Edward laughed, nervous, and pressed a button on the stereo.

"Happy birthday," he murmured to me.

Instruments jumped into that first note, springing to life with a harmonized breathlessness that reminded me of sky blue, lavender, spots of gold, and brown. An overwhelming, bright, vibrant first measure calmed into a languid, inquisitive piano.

Oftentimes, a song would have competing colors, for better or for worse. Anything I wanted to paint would require several relistenings and a full-on moodboard before the oil would ever hit the canvas.

Art supplies were expensive—you had to be sure of your vision.

But this. This was gorgeous. Like it had been written with the intention of being ready for the canvas.

For me.

“It’s been in my mind for a while now. At first, they were just bits of melodies you’ve given me from our time together. The happy, sunny times.”

“Like a tapestry of little memories?” I joked, voice thick with emotion.

“In the middle of the night, if you start tossing, I hum it to you. I think you like it. It calms you down.” He grinned. “You stop trying to kick me, anyway.”

“Which memories did you use?”

“G-minor, when you first spoke to me—that was the first measure. The first night I stayed over. Picking wild blackberries for you on the way to the meadow. And— Do you remember the second time we took the truck to that forest a couple miles north of Goat Rocks?” I frowned. “In July? We played Nickel Nock in the truckbed? You were asking about the—"

“Fireflies,” we finished in unison. I laughed. “Duh!” I told him it’d been the first time I’d seen one in person. Edward turned off the lamp and caught one for me in his hands just so I could see it up close. I smiled wide. “The little chimes in background. Is that them? The fireflies?”

“Perceptive.”

Tears threatened to spill over; I wiped one away from the corner with my thumb.

hey Silk Buns anon, you can choose your own nickname as far as i'm concerned. i love you

COME NIGHTFALL CHAPTER 3: DATE - DVD COMMENTARY

[i haven't read this chapter since i posted it lmao OOP-]

The intimacy and burn of his fingers on my skin made me remember with striking emotion how much I missed him touching me, how starved I was.

We breathed in unison [ok but fr breathing in unison w/ ur partner is relaxing as fuck]. Every other moment, a faint static would pulse down my body. At first, I thought it was him flinching, but it was rhythmic and soft. Like was responding to me. Like our bodies were syncing up. In a good way.

[it's wild how many hints i dropped about the mating bond. i was resolved to put it in the fic because it was an unexplored part of smeyer's lore & an interesting creative challenge (much like imprinting, although that's more about fixing mistakes than fleshing out a concept). but i didn't have the mechanics of mating hammered out at all. details like this are fun to come back to because they ended up fitting perfectly.]

I sighed. “I wish it could be like this all the time.”

He caught my hand in his and brought the back of it to his lips.

“Em’s obsessed with carbon-neutral cabins now,” said Edward. “I should ask him to build us one.” [something something By Starlight Chapter 9: Envoy]

I could practically hear the smile on him.

Usually, I would balk and respond along the lines of No way, Jose.

Cactus Bella would’ve, anyway. [Cactus Bella should have come back]

“Yes. Art studio in the attic [HEY!!!!], recording studio in the basement.”

“And a library.” [i picture them having a tiny cabin with a loft, lots of plants, artwork, cozy chairs, one of those little roller ladders for their library, & tons of windows that overlook the forest below. i'm projecting my own desires btw]

“The rest of the house is a library. Every room has at least one floor-to-ceiling bookshelf.” [get you a fanfic Edward Cullen who says "YES, AND"!!!]

“And we could decorate and hang up pictures. And we’d never pay rent.” [i can't imagine how much Bella hates dealing with landlords. from her describing her experiences delivering Renee's late rent to telling Phil to pay rent early to "get the landlord off Renee's back" to her doing DIY plumbing repairs, it feels like she does everything in her power to avoid getting a landlord in her hair. honestly, mood.]

“And I would make tea for you every morning and dinner for you every night. We would stay there for weeks at a time.”

“Months.”

“Years.”

“Forever.”

“Forever,” he echoed. It sounded off.

The sun dropped into the horizon.

“Twilight, again,” I remembered him saying at prom. “No matter how perfect the day is, it always has to end….”

[so interesting, this shift we see in Edward by the end of Come Nightfall/beginning of By Starlight. in ITA he insists there is an end to all things (especially the self). contrast this with BS Chapter 1: Ultimatum where he insists Bella isn't terminal. he's able to rationalize that he can't keep Bella, but the more he falls in love with her, the less he wants to stand by his assertion that there is an end to all things...]

At prom, it had sounded romantic.

Here, it haunted me.

We didn’t speak. Only dying birdsongs and classical music filled the silence.

“Hah hah. As if this was remotely Wagnerian.” For a moment he tensed underneath me; his faltering chuckle returned. “I was wondering when you’d say something. What do you think?”

[in the early stages of drafting these fics, i list bullet points of things that i think would be cool to write. at the climax of New Moon, instead of exposing himself to humans, i thought it'd be fun if Edward had turned Bella's lullaby into an anti-Volturi operatic work that he would play throughout Volterra on St Marcus' Day. not all ideas are good ideas]

What set it apart were the colors. They jumped off the track. Purples and orangey-yellows, mostly, but the piano sounded like the greenest grass Forks had ever grown. [Bella has chromesthesia. light spoilers?, this comes back later]

“Unedited thoughts only,” he warned me.

“Classical influences with modern touches.”

“Exactly.”

“Dramatic?”

“In good way. Y’know? Not so cloying and loud.”

“Calmer.”

“Yeah. Less struggle. If that makes sense.”

“Interesting.” He tried keeping an even face but his eyes lit up. He nuzzled his face into my collar. “But the real question: do you like it?”

“Hell yeah. That’s my biased opinion. You know I like your recs.”

“Except Bobby Vinton.” [deleted a whole scene about Bella and Edward arguing over how much Bobby Vinton sucks, so this was my compromise]

“Fifties trash,” I said with a dismissive shrug, “what can you say?” [SO true bestie]

“I’d say your taste in men is better than your taste in music, and that’s not saying much.” [HEY!]

His voice was jovial—and false.

—No, not false.

Shaken with a sheepish nervousness. Embarrassment?

I laid back against his chest. Puzzle pieces assembled in my head, so loud and clear I would assume he could hear me coming to my conclusions.

Edward was nervous.

All night, he’d been nervous.

The good kind of nervous.

“Okay,” I said. “I’ll bite. Tell me.”

Laying against him, I could feel excitement coursing through him.

“Hm?”

“The tongue on you.” His lips kissed my temple, tickled the shell of my ear when he spoke. “That dead guy is me, thank you very much.”

“Huh?” I whipped around to face him with an open-mouthed smile. “No way.”

“Yes, way. Wrote and performed.”

This, like everything else about Edward, seemed otherworldly in its grace and beauty. It felt like listening to the future of music—refined to an even higher degree of perfection.

Of course this was his.

“Is it so hard to believe?”

Now my hands played nervously with the locks of his hair that sat at the nape of his neck. “No, it’s just, you said you hadn't written anything since the 70s, and the colors are just—I mean it’s perfect, so I guess I shouldn’t be surprised, but, just—wow." [Edward likely doesn't know she has synesthesia, considering how much of herself she's hidden from him pre-breakup.]

"Eloquent as always."

“You assume I have more to say?”

I snickered, raking my hand through his hair and pulling on it. He purred. “Six words? You? Please,” I said, and he laughed. “What d’you got for me? Historical context? Music theory? Behind-the-scenes anecdote? You gotta unedit, y’know.” [it's crazy to go back to these earlier scenes and hear this Bella talk. there's such a stark difference imo between pre- & post-breakup Bella. in By Starlight, she's sounds more mature, somber, careful with her words, closer to canon. i can def see why readers abandon these works lmao]

“It’s a lullaby.” Beat. “Your lullaby.” Another beat. “I wrote it for you.”

I blinked. Stilled.

“For me?” My hand fell back to his chest, leaving his hair a wild, sculpted mess. Edward watched my face fall and eyes drift toward the speaker; his brows knit. “A lullaby? For me?”

Edward laughed, nervous, and pressed a button on the stereo.

"Happy birthday," he murmured to me.

Art supplies were expensive—you had to be sure of your vision.

But this. This was gorgeous. Like it had been written with the intention of being ready for the canvas.

For me.

“It’s been in my mind for a while now. At first, they were just bits of melodies you’ve given me from our time together. The happy, sunny times.”

“Like a tapestry of little memories?” I joked, voice thick with emotion.

“In the middle of the night, if you start tossing, I hum it to you. I think you like it. It calms you down.” He grinned. “You stop trying to kick me, anyway.”

“Which memories did you use?”

“G-minor, when you first spoke to me—that was the first measure. The first night I stayed over. Picking wild blackberries for you on the way to the meadow. [i've always thought this Edward had some crow-ass behavior going on. like he'll just show up at Bella's window with a handful of berries or a shiny pebble or a tiny flower and be like, "i come bearing gifts (caw)"] And— Do you remember the second time we took the truck to that forest a couple miles north of Goat Rocks?” I frowned. “In July? We played Nickel Nock in the truckbed? You were asking about the—"

“Perceptive.”

Tears threatened to spill over; I wiped one away from the corner with my thumb.

send me 500 words of my fanfic & i will give you the equivalent of a DVD commentary on that snippet

#thank you!!#asks #come nightfall #fanfic dvd commentary

5 notes · View notes

mirrorballtales · 10 months

Text

Time to Analyze Vault Tracks - I’m Breaking My Silence. . . A song per night!

Dare I say it, dare I say that these are some of her best vault tracks. Now listen, Don’t You is my favorite vault track in her entire discography. Even more than All Too Well TVTMVFTV(for those not privy to the acronym, Taylor’s Version, Ten Minute Version, From the Vault). BUT, Speak Now TV has some vault tracks I am so happy I did not have access to in high school because it would have done me over. Actually it’s a reality check I could have used my senior year. Could have saved me a lot of time and a lot of delusion. Thinking about it, I could have had some of these songs on rotation when I had my little nightly breakdowns. Like these songs found an untapped memory of growing up, the pain of liking, loving, falling in love, and all of that not being reciprocated. She finds a way to sing what so many of us experienced and might be experiencing now. It’s incredible. It takes me back to being 15, 16, 17 and being a foolish one. So now let’s tap into these masterpieces. One per night. I have too many thoughts to break down all at once.

Electric Touch

First of all, I grew up in the Y2K era. Like think 2000-2011. The height of emo bands 🖤, teen movies, guy gets girl, guy gets shy girl. Think teen movie soundtrack. A coming of age song. That’s what this is! And I am beyond obsessed. I’m a whore for soft rock. A total whore for romcoms. A total whore for teen romcoms. Yes I am. Now Fall Out Boy! HOLY SHIT! Sometimes, features ruin songs, they overpower the message a song is trying to convey. Patrick does this song justice. He enhances the message. Their voices combined is absolute magic.

First line and I die, “Just breathe, just relax, it’ll be okay. Just an hour til your car’s in the driveway. Just the first night ever hanging out with you.” PLEASE! These lyrics! It’s a first date! She captures how incredibly anxiety-inducing this is. For all reasons. You don’t know where this can lead but you know there is just a tiny spark there that can grow and really become something or burn out before it even touches you. But there is excitement.

Then she says, “I’ve got my money on things going badly. I’ve got a history of stories ending sadly. . .” Then comes the chorus, “ALL I KNOW IS THIS COULD EITHER BREAK MY HEART OR BRING IT BACK TO LIFE. GOT A FEELING YOUR ELECTRIC TOUCH COULD FILL THIS GHOST TOWN BACK WITH LIFE.” This is exactly what it looks like. The being in-like stage. Smitten. When you’ve been burned, when you know how the stories have ended. But there’s something there, and whatever that something is, could be the best thing that ever happens to you or bring you misery. And liking someone is a stamp of faith. Telling yourself and them, I don’t know what the future holds. Right now I don’t care. I like you. And I know that there are two endings here, it could end badly. It could end in my heart shattering into a million pieces, it could be catastrophic. Or it could be the fire that doesn’t burn me but lights me up. It could be the thing that starts my heart up again. That electric touch that gives my heart the energy to beat.

Now Patrick comes in, his voice is so beautiful here. It compliments hers so well. Not to mention - how many times do we want to read a book from the guy’s perspective. There is something so romantic of knowing a man is willing to let himself love. “I’ve been left in the rain lost and pining. I’m trying hard not to look like I’m trying. Cause every time I try hard for love it fell apart. I’ve gotten used to no one calling my phone. . . Still I know that all it takes to get it right is just one time.” Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. First of all, one of my favorite words is pining. It sounds just how it’s supposed to and conveys exactly what it is. This agony of willing something to happen. This longing, heart wrenching, nausea-inducing feeling that can only be described as pining. How many times have you felt like you did everything “right” in a relationship. You tried to be everything you thought the other person wanted. Picking up flowers. Sending sweet texts. Maybe writing letters. But it was overwhelming to the other person. It scared them off. Or maybe they just weren’t the right one. Or staring into the depths of your phone. Or if we’re being true to the era this song screams, then staring at your landline hoping that cute girl calls, or the boy you like so much finally calls. And you cancel plans in case they call, but it doesn’t happen. So you glance at the phone knowing the call won’t come. Yeah, I remember. I even remember the boy I would will into calling my phone. But then one day, the phone rings, and maybe just maybe, thru those wires, an electricity sparks and you think, that’s the voice I wanted to hear right now.

So now let’s get to the bridge. My favorite part. She’s a genius. Part of me can’t believe an nineteen year old wrote this, then I remember actually, every nineteen year old knows what this is. So I not only believe it but I am glad someone did write this. This is our movie, our life, in a song.

I was thinking just one time (Just one time)

Maybe the stars align (Just one time)

And maybe I call you mine

And you won't need space

Or string me along while you decide

And just one time (Just one time)

Maybe the moment's right (The moment's right)

It's 8:05 and I see two headlights

Do you realize what just happened? It’s EIGHT OH FIVE! As in this song is sung in the span of those agonizing five minutes. Will he show up? Will she want me there? Will he not come? Will she be waiting? And at 8:05 any and all worries vanish and it’s just two people ready to walk together. Into an unknown. Love is having faith. In love. In life. In people. In whatever form love comes in. I’ve always said, there is something so beautiful and serendipitous about the beginning of everything and anything. The way she says, maybe just this time, everything will be fine. Maybe he’s the one, maybe this is right. He won’t be another guy that leads me on, or tosses me to the side when he decides he’s had enough. This time it’s right. That’s what she’s saying here. Then she says, “it’s 8:05 and I see two headlights.” That line encompasses all hope, excitement, and an honesty that yeah, this could be a fucking disaster. I could go home and say, well he’s not the one, or I could say, I laughed so hard, I want to laugh again. That’s what that line is and why I love it so much.

The production is phenomenal, almost euphoric, and so reminiscent of those bands we all listened to in middle school. It’s nostalgic while reminding us to have faith in love, to admit that love isn’t easy sometimes, sometimes it’s not the right fit, but my god, take the chance, call them, text them, go on the date. Cause maybe just one time, the stars will align.

Overall this is a 10/10 and now one of my favorite songs.

#taylor swift #taylornation #the eras tour #vault tracks #electric touch #fall out boy #emo scene #romcom #teen movies #lovers #taylor’s version #speak now taylor’s version

3 notes · View notes

the-bloody-sadist · 1 year

Note

prepare for an entire novel please because ive just finished sinner and i have so much to say. tl;dr its my favourite thing in the world thank you for writing it.

i dont know what that story did to me honestly. ive never EVER felt so..... viscerally from something written. its insane. it made me feel so numb for so long and then it made me Feel and i feel like i just went through the entire rollercoaster with dazai. it made me cry and it made my chest so so painfully tight and it made my body go numb and it made me stop caring about anything in the world aside from just. that. reading that.

i am an absolute sucker for tiny touches and gestures that feel incredibly significant. obviously, sinner is packed full of those, and i am LIVING- its so slow and meticulous and particular and everything is so significant and its SO SLOW I WISH I COULD WRITE LIKE THIS. so so slow, the way everything happens. so dragged out and full of suspense and anxiety and i cannot explain how much i adore it.

i dont know why but. the thing that made me audibly gasp and cover my mouth like i was in a movie was when dazai said "mori likes it when i play doll". i cant scream enough about it. i had to drop everything and scream at my friends about it. i cannot explain the sheer Emotion. i dont know why, i dont KNOW when after everything thats happened that just seems so silly and mild but just. it really highlights how no matter how absolutely horrible fyodor was and how much he broke dazai, dazai got there already broken. it comes so suddenly its like seven punches in the gut and then several kicks when i was already on the floor wheezing. then a bus, rolling over my entire body. twice. made my spirit leave my body for multiple minutes before i was ready to continue.

and yes the chuuya x akutagawa parts were absolute gold i am obsessed i have never thought about that ship in my life but i will never stop thinking about it ever again.

thats it, i think. i say, closing my seven page essay-

no actually fuck it now that im already here let me just say forbidden blood is also a masterpiece and i reread it like 5 times and its good every single time. ok. now thats it.

have a good day :)

Good GRIEFFFFF!!!! Talk about feeling accomplished as an author when you get an ask like this holy SHIT.

I wish I could respond to every detail but I was literally sitting there with my mouth open and little tears pricking my eyes through the whole thing because THIS!!!!! THIS IS JUST!!!! Every reaction described is everything I’ve ever wanted to hit my readers with and I am insanely pleased that it at least hit you and the others who’ve told me as much.

That is ACTUALLY crazy about the Mori line because I HIGHLY debated taking that out 😂 the entire chapter really, but mostly that line felt so corny and I was like “am I pushing it??” But now I feel great about it. So thank you.

What you said about the TINIEST touches feeling gigantic is also MY favorite thing (no surprise) and I really had never discovered that as a possibility until anime as a genre, and how that brought out a lot of subtleties feeling like pillars of emotional damage and/or healing. Whenever I write anything, I want this the most. And it really worked out for Sinner.

THANK YOU SO MUCH. This made my day. And Forbidden Blood too!!! You trooper! Thank you for the compliments on that as well!

May both sides of your pillow stay cold for eternity. 😩✊ Much love to you!

#IM CRYING #best compliment ever #sadist’s answered asks #sinner discourse #sinner reference #sinner #sinner fanfic

8 notes · View notes

thewhitefluffyhat · 2 years

Text

Thoughts on Harrow the Ninth

Similar to my post on Gideon the Ninth, this is a questionably organized collection of impressions, opinions, and a recounting of my experience in reading this book!

Note: This post also includes marked sections where I compare certain Harrow the Ninth plot elements with first the When They Cry series and then Madoka Magica: Rebellion, because that’s just the way my brain works. Those sections do contain spoilers for the other stories, so feel free to skip or read them accordingly!

After finishing GtN, a few months passed. For various reasons, I found I had to go on a long family roadtrip and needed something to do in the car… and I thought “hm. why not.” and bought HtN.

(So yes, there was Poster Child For A Liberal City Girl aka Me casually wandering around some deep red rural parts of the country with “the necromancers are back, and they’re gayer than ever” emblazoned on the book I refused to put down. Probably made for an amusing picture!)

Anyway, it was a good thing I wasn’t called on to help drive during that trip, because I started the book in the morning and was only barely able to put it down for meals and checking into the hotel. Oh, we had to get up early to drive the next day? I didn’t care, I just waited for everyone else in the room to fall asleep and then stayed up until 2am curled up on the tiny bathroom counter to finish it.

Like a Smart Person, I’d also neglected to take my copy of Gideon the Ninth with me on the trip, and I didn’t have internet access either. And as mentioned, I’d marathoned GtN over the course of a single night several months prior. In other words: my memory of the events in that book was extremely unreliable, which, I have to say, only enhanced the surreal atmosphere of HtN. I was just as confused and uncertain as Harrow, and it was delightful.

And after finishing, I continued my tradition and proceeded to gush incoherently about it to my younger brother the next sleep-deprived morning. (I do wonder what his secondhand impression of these books is, haha.)

Luckily I had brought other books with me to read; I don’t know how I would have staved off my cravings to dive into fandom analysis otherwise. But first things first: my thoughts on the book!

I Swear This Book Was Made To Appeal Directly To Me??

-Yeah, so remember that “I’m a sex-averse-ish ace” thing I mentioned in the previous post? And how I really wanted Less Swords More Bones Please And Thank You? Needless to say, Harrow won me over as a protagonist instantaneously. And that’s without getting into a whole bunch of other really weird, really specific things about her/HtN that were precisely my thing.

-For example, I am neither neurodivergent nor mentally ill (afaik), but I still related so hard to Harrow’s food sensitivities, her touch-shyness, her obsessions, her completely broken sleep schedule… I mean, oh gosh, the thing with John’s tea and biscuits? I have never before read something that so perfectly captures the feeling of someone giving you food and you would like to eat it to please them but you just. Cannot. And the sheer uncomfortableness and background radiation of polite disappointment that entails. Especially when they keep trying! Gah!

-Another random, tiny moment that stood out to me: Gideon’s response to waking up in Harrow’s body. See, even relatively tame and mainstream anime (Shinkai’s “Your Name” springs to mind) still feel the need to kick off their body switching plots by having one character immediately and nonconsensually grope their love interest’s body when the switch happens.

But instead of doing that, Gideon keeps apologizing, desperately trying to protect Harrow’s body, and even declaring she’ll take showers fully clothed. Is it over-the-top and did I laugh? Absolutely. But the point is also that she’s determined to be considerate of Harrow’s privacy, even to an absurd degree. It’s a strong way to show that Gideon genuinely cares about Harrow, serving as a welcome contrast after an entire book of every other character ignoring and often actively trying to erode Harrow’s boundaries.

-Last but the opposite of least: I actually really love Second Person POV! If anything, that’s often the most natural POV for me to write fanfic in, for whatever reason. But it’s specifically second person where the “you” is a defined, in-universe character. Second person where “you” is meant to be You The Reader, You The Self-Insert makes me instinctively roll my eyes. (A bias that is definitely not related to my thoughts on Frisk vs Chara vs The Player in Undertale, what are you talking about, ahaha.)

So reading a whole book in that POV? YASSSS. And then the reveal of Gideon as the first person narrator on top of it? Incredible. Genius. Honestly I would recommend this book just for the utter brilliance of that twist.

I’m admitting my own ignorance here, but this is definitely the first long-form genre work I’ve read in First Person Direct Address POV. Heck, this is the first time I’ve ever run across that term! *narrows eyes at my creative writing teachers* And oooh boy I am dying to give it a spin myself in fanfic, it’s so good.

Harrow the “Unreliable” Narrator

Backing up a bit, though, I think I can pinpoint the exact scene when I knew I would love this book: the conversation between Harrow and Ortus, with the wham line of “You see, I am insane.”

Because my first thought on reading that was: oh hell yes this is going to be a RIDE

Quickly followed by the second thought: hang on, was this… was this true for Harrow during GtN as well? She was potentially dealing with hallucinations and unreality this whole time and we (Gideon, the audience) had no idea? oh, Harrow… TT_TT

And indeed, the rest of the book lived up to the dual promises of that moment - of the free-fall into the depths of horror and paranoia that comes with a narrator who’s not just unreliable, but knows they can’t even trust themselves. And of Harrow being a wonderfully compelling protagonist, equal parts heartbreaking meow meow balanced out by raw, unrelenting determination.

Then there was the final payoff to all the narrative shenanigans: the dawning reveal that actually, Harrow was right all along. And oh, I loved it when I read it and I still love the concept now! The idea of presenting the reader with the hoary old trope of an "insane," unreliable narrator, and then having the twist be that they were perfectly reliable where it counted? Beautiful. Amazing. I couldn’t be completely certain until I read the note from the author at the end, but threading throughout the fantasy trappings, this read like a book that came from a very personal place, and had some very sharp things to say about people who get dismissed as “insane.”

(On that note - are there any moments where Harrow outright hallucinates? I certainly took the “a few out-of-order bumps in the temporal gyrus that might have been there already” line as leaving open the interpretation that she’s genuinely schizophrenic in addition to the wacky supernatural nonsense she has to deal with…)

Harrow Would Make a Great When They Cry Character, Prove Me Wrong

An unreliable narrator? A fantasy-infused murder mystery in that lovely mindscrew “is it magic? Is it mundane? Is it a hallucination?” mode? There’s a surprising amount of Harrow the Ninth that reminds me of the best parts of When They Cry novels.

(Look, just because I’m not actively participating in the fandom doesn’t mean my WTC brainworms have gone away. :P)

To the first point, I would absolutely argue that Harrow gives Rena and Shion and other WTC characters a run for their money at Best Unreliable Narrator. In particular, if you enjoyed moments like Rena trying to logic through her paranoia in Tsumihoroboshi and only digging herself deeper, or Rika dissociating and wishing to erase part of herself in Saikoroshi - this book is for you.

Meanwhile, Harrow’s internal conflict - that “Is somebody trying to kill her? And if they succeeded, would the universe be better off?” from the summary blurb still haunts me! - evokes some of my favorite When They Cry character beats. “Why was I born?”/“I’m sorry for being born.” are lines that keep recurring throughout the WTC series, and for good reason. The regret and tragedy of a monstrous existence sure makes for some excellent character drama!

After Higurashi Sotsu left me hanging with its poorly-written antagonist, I was desperately craving something that did a complex, Beatrice-like character well, and I found that in Harrow. Though it’s perhaps less surprising of a jump than you might think; both Umineko and The Locked Tomb series are heavily influenced by gothic literature. Something something kids messed up by the crime of their conception, something something continuing the cycle of violence by taking it out on the only other person who might have helped them instead.

If only, I were… Never born to begin with at all; More smiles may have blossomed, But we'll never know now

If only, I were… Able to cease my own breath, Maybe some could have lived on?

Surely, even these feelings Will soon lose their form— But can we walk on ahead As if nothing ever happened?

(Umineko’s “hope” is too soft and peaceful of a song to truly fit Harrow’s gremlin energy, and yet… hm.)

Finally, here’s some mood whiplash: in other WTC news, Ianthe has managed to steal the title of Best Worst Girl from Furudo Erika. Which is no mean feat! I love her. I can’t wait to see her get worse. I especially love that the fandom is entirely on board with her being The Absolute Worst. <3

Dream Bubble AUs, Unburying Your Gays, and PMMM: Rebellion

The Madoka Magica: Rebellion parallels are much much more tenuous, but boy oh boy do I have Feels about them. Homura dreamt of a world where she and Madoka could both live cheerful lives as magical girls - not one where she stole and sealed away Madoka’s powers. Harrow dreamt of worlds where Gideon had comparatively more freedom and power - not ones where she was the shackle binding Gideon to the Ninth. In both cases, idyllic fanfic-influenced dream AUs are used as a clever means of portraying the more equal dynamic a character actually wants from a relationship vs the deeply broken and possessive dynamic they had with that person in reality.

It’s just such a fascinating storytelling device that accomplishes so many things at once!

-By contrasting these happier universes with the characters’ reality, it deftly underlines how strongly the characters have been warped by their traumas into their current selves, without the result feeling maudlin or unearned. -Because the setting is a character’s mindscape, any setting details are also implicitly characterization details. So it’s a rich opportunity to explore the dreamer’s unfiltered and most heartfelt desires - and a whole lot of other amusing quirks besides. (Was Homura a fan of magical girl shows? Was Harrow thinking of Pal’s ridiculous novel when she came up with that Ball AU? Why are both of them so fond of coffee??) -By specifically invoking fanfiction tropes, it also becomes a sweet and positive way to acknowledge the power of transformative fandom, and the value of sharing and reimagining stories to grapple with our own identities. -And finally, by giving the audience a taste of “what could have been,” it makes a fraught relationship that much easier to root for - an implied preview of “what might yet be.”

I also have even MORE Feels about disaster lesbians spectacularly rejecting the idea of a Bury Your Gays so hard they shatter their own minds and even reality itself in the process. Because, look. In both HtN and Rebellion, the main character arc seems to be heading toward a conclusion where the protagonist finally faces reality, regains their memories, and bittersweetly accepts their love interest’s heroic sacrifice. But in a last minute twist, the protagonist says “screw that” to the obvious ending and doubles down on rejecting their love interest’s death as the world collapses around them.

After so, so many stories where lesbians are killed off for tragedy, it’s an incredibly striking and resonant choice! To have a character put their foot down, tell the rest of the universe to go to hell, and say No. To look at a neat and perfect heroic sacrifice and refuse it in favor of a messier, more imperfect conclusion - but one in which their love interest has a chance to live. That was the powerful moment of catharsis that made me love Rebellion despite its problems, and it’s executed just as, if not more beautifully, in HtN.

(“There’s a difference between keeping a shred of a dance card,” said Harrow Nonagesimus, and saving the last dance.” - MY HEART. “It’s love!” all over again!)

Now, I’d like to say that the difference that puts HtN ahead is that Rebellion portrays this reversal of expectations in a negative light while HtN is more triumphant. But if I’m being honest… they’re both extremely ambiguous and nigh-incomprehensibly symbolic in their cliffhanger endings! (And in both cases the love interest is not a fan of having their own choices overwritten…) But I made peace years ago with the ambiguity in the last act of Rebellion, so it’s not like I minded it much in HtN either.

Still, it does make me wonder: will Nona+Alecto pan out better than the upcoming Rebellion sequel? My money is currently on the former, but with neither out yet, who can say?

Speaking of which…

Concerns for the Sequels?

As much as I’m invested in Griddlehark (and I am VERY invested), I could just as easily see it not happening. Of course, Muir’s writing has been strong enough that I’d like to think that whatever happens instead will at least be interesting. Plus, it’s not like Gideon and Harrow need to be in a romantic relationship with each other to be lesbians! Though whether the books will stay the course in not shoving them at male love interests at the last minute is something I sincerely hope but just cannot bring myself to trust after so many bad experiences with other authors.

However, it’s not shipping that’s my main concern.

No, the aspect that actually gives me pause is the Christian slant of the books. And I’m not talking about the Spoopy Space Catholicism worldbuilding or Bible allusions. Those are cool! Rather, it’s in the subtle little things, like how Muir describes Gideon forgiving Harrow so quickly as the moment Gideon “achieves grace.” When I read it, I personally found Gideon’s trauma being resolved so neatly and easily to be odd and underwritten. And if major plot and characterization beats are going to be resting on a religious rather than character-driven base, then, well… I’m worried that the final result may resonate with Christian audiences but I’ll simply find it alienating and unsatisfying.

Of course, it’s not that there’s anything wrong with writing books shaped by one’s religion. But that would be a signal that these books are fundamentally not for me, and I should find another fandom.

It’s also why I’m perhaps less on board with “flowers will die on necromancy’s grave” (although that certainly is a nicely poetic turn of phrase!) than it appears most of the fandom is. I’m very wary of themes of restoring the world/society/people back to some inherently “natural'' or “divine” order. One of the few things that could still completely ruin the series for me would be a swerve where now that False Idol John has been killed and the River is Fixed™, everyone abandons their witchcraft to go back to worshiping Real Christian Jesus as they were intended to. Or a conclusion where everyone dies and that’s portrayed as a happy end, because they’re With God so it’s all good, right?

I have no particular love for Christianity, so to me, an ending along those lines would read as though the series abandoned its anti-imperialist themes and replaced one empire with a return to another, even crueler one. No thank you!

(Not that I think those things are especially likely to happen. Like with the queerness, I've just been burned from some very weird prior experiences, haha.)

I'm also surprised by how universally the fandom assumes John will be the endgame villain. I'm a cynic, and I could quite easily see the series doing a disappointing swerve in the opposite direction, valorizing and "redeeming" God and his empire once we have more insight into his motives. A similarly universally-reviled character got that treatment in my last fandom, and hoo boy did it ever set the discourse (and the story in general) on fire! Another development I'm not keen to experience a repeat of!

Fandom and Future Things

Well that was dire, let’s go back to talking about fun things instead!

So, new obsessions tend to sneak up on me slowly. I don’t just finish something and immediately know it will consume the next few years of my life. The true story is, when I got internet access again, I read through the #tlt tags on some blogs that I remembered had occasionally posted about it, and then I went about my business.

And that could have been the end of it.

But the beginning signs were already there. In between assembling IKEA furniture, I spent the rest of the trip daydreaming the threads of what would become only the first of many, many fic ideas.

Since then, I’ve read a lot more analysis, and even more fanfic. So much fanfic. This is also the first time I’ve felt comfortable going through a fandom tag with the blanket policy that yes, I will be reading explicit fics too. (Honestly: the porn has been less weird than I expected.)

Of course, I’m quite late to the party on this fandom. And I’m not sure how much I’ll both be able and want to contribute. I probably won’t be writing weekly analysis posts and committing myself to a long fanfic like I did for Higurashi, at the very least. That was exhausting.

However, I now have 25 pages of saved fanfic links to convert into bookmarks, oodles of tumblr posts to reblog, and some 150-odd pages of post ideas and fanfic plot bunnies of my own. I doubt much of the latter will ever see the light of day, but the point is: I’ve been having fun.

So yes, I think it’s safe to say I liked HtN. I actually liked it even more than GtN, following the exact same pattern as my feelings for Higurashi/Umineko and PMMM/Rebellion. The first work interested me, but the follow up stole my heart and then ate my brain.

In conclusion: GtN intrigued me, but HtN inspired me. And oh. It feels so nice to be excited and hopeful and creative again.

#the locked tomb #harrow the ninth #harrowhark nonagesimus #when they cry #pmmm #madoka magica #rebellion #higurashi #umineko #tlt analysis #my ramblings #my tlt stuff #read more #tbh #I should probably have made those sections their own posts #oh well #there is no separating anime analysis from literary analysis in my head #all fiction goes through the same thoughtsfeels blender

7 notes · View notes

servin-up-surveys · 11 months

Text

survey #153

Do you ever feel left out? When? Yes, primarily with my sisters; especially this last time I had lunch with my dad and sisters, I learned they do like... quite a lot without me or Mom, and that hurts. Like I get it, I don't drive so would have to rely on somebody else, but I'm never invited to these little fun things they do.

How useful do you feel to others? Oh dear jesus christ, entirely and completely useless.

Do you think you’re depressed? Why? I've been diagnosed with it since I was a pre-teen, so yes, I factually am. Diagnosed depression never fully goes away, I've just gotten better at handling my symptoms.

Is there a loaded gun in your house? Do you have access to it? No, no person who lives with me (and obviously myself) is legally allowed to own firearms because of my history, and nor do I even want one in my house ever.

Your best kiss was with whom? Either Girt or Jason, I don't know. I kinda don't remember how kisses from Jason were anymore.

Do you like to cuddle with this person? Girt, yes, but I'd never cuddle with Jason again. I loved it once, but not anymore.

Do you trust your bf/gf with your life? I honestly do.

Would you rather have an orange, red or gray bedroom? Hm... I think orange. Red sounds cool and pretty, but I like the brightness of orange, makes the room livelier.

Does it bother you when people’s underwear hangs out? It looks dumb to me, but so long as you have your truly private areas are covered in public, do whatever.

Would you date someone 5 years older than you? Yeah.

Have you ever met anyone who was overly addicted to a computer game? Me, lol. I'm very thankful it's been under control since I took a super long break though and especially lately I've barely been touching it even once a week or two.

Have you ever been fingered? Well when you grew up a technically abstinent Christian girl you figure shit out lmfao

Has anyone ever told you that you have a big butt? HA no, I would immediately know you were lying; even as a really in-shape teenager who did yoga every day, my ass has always been flat 😭

What makes you feel like a kid again? Being in the ocean comes to mind immediately; I've noticed that I giggle a lot being tossed around and hit by the water, it's just fun. I VERY rarely do this, but I also feel kid-like when someone eases me into feeling safe and unjudged belting out songs or dancing, but that is so incredibly rare these days because I obsess over not being seen in a judgmental, looking-down-your-nose-at-me way. I would basically rather die than experience embarrassment. I also like doing coloring books with other adults and just chilling.

Are you a good kisser? No one's ever complained.

What was your 1st alcoholic beverage? Mike's Hard Lemonade. ... Actually wait, it might have been a tiny sip of wine???? I grew up going to a Catholic church, and doing the Eucharist ritual thing is routine, and I remember how fucking awful the drink was, even though you only got a teeny-tiny sip, like an adult held and tilted the cup to ensure of that. Many places use grape juice in place of the grape wine, but with how traditional the church I went to was, and also just remembering how awful the taste was, I definitely think it was the traditional wine.

Do you have a crush on anyone? Well it's way more than a crush.

Have you ever been on an airplane? Yeah, a few times.

Have you ever gone scuba diving? No, but I'd really like to! My mom used to have a license for it and even swam with manatees and I will permanently be SO envious, haha.

What do you think of your last ex? Not good things, I'll leave it at that lmfao

Does your sibling have a significant other? They all do, yes. All but Nicole are married, but she has a good boyfriend.

How would you feel if a girl asked your boyfriend out for a drink? I wouldn't be okay with that in the case of some random girl asking him, and even if it was a close friend, I really do trust him, but I'd still want to be there too, it's just respectful imo. I don't want my anxiety spinning stories that aren't even true while he's gone. He doesn't drink anyway though so you wouldn't see him at a bar.

What do your flipflops look like? They're just black.

Name some models you think are hot. lol I don't even know the names of models.

Does your significant other like the same color as you do? Like, favorite color? Don't know what he thinks of pink, actually.

Do you have a passport? No, hopefully one day to travel!

Do you say any words that are pretty specific to your area? I'm sure there are some things, but phrases exclusive to here is more likely. We say "y'all," of course, but I feel like that's been adopted outside the south anyway.

Do you know anyone who everyone thinks is gay, but is not out? No, not since middle school; everyone thought my friend William was gay, including myself, but he didn't "come out" until high school. He's loud and proud about it now, I love him.

Are your teeth straight? Mostly, yes. I do have an overbite though that my braces once fixed, but because I didn't wear my retainer, they moved back some. My front bottom incisors are a bit crooked though from having braces on too long, they got a bit crowded so have very slight overlapping, but it's not bad at all.

Would you ever paint your house an unusual color? Totally not against it, like can you IMAGINE a pink house?, but I wouldn't go out of my way to pay for that or do it myself, I just don't care enough.

What is the cutest animal? TOTALLY not biased or anything lol, but I genuinely do think it's meerkats, like they're so small and watching them stand up on their hind legs like lil men is adorable, and they're just cute as hell in general. I love their big eyes! Kittens are also incredibly cute, I've got a weakness for baby cats.

Would you mind dating someone significantly shorter than you? Nah, height means literally nothing to me.

Have you ever swam in the Atlantic Ocean? Yep.

The Pacific? No.

Have you ever dated a fat person? Juan was on the larger side, as well as Tyler, but that's it. I'm not against it at all, I've just coincidentally dated mostly slim or even underweight people.

Was your last kiss sober? Yes, never kissed somebody while drunk.

What is one hot beverage that you like? Hot chocolate.

Do you have any relatives who are expecting a baby really soon? No.

Do you sleep in socks? Ugh no, I could never. Socks are very uncomfortable to me, it's a sensory thing.

Is the person you’re interested in, interested in you? Yes, I definitely trust that he is. He shows it.

Is there a band you like that many others dislike? Which? lol yes, Marilyn Manson is probably the most obvious, like he's always gotten the side-eye from media, and Rammstein's gotten plenty of hate too, and then Otep gets a lot of negativity as well, but she as a person IS an insanely aggressive bitch so lol, I love her music though. I'm a metal fan in general though so that alone makes a great majority of the bands I listen to disliked by some groups.

To you, which is better: English muffins or bagels? Bagels, but both are good.

Do you consider yourself a romantic? I definitely think so, I know plenty of people think romance is cheesy, but I love it, man. Cute fun stuff.

Which element best represents you? Y'know, I've never been sure about this question, but with a quick google search I am EASILY water.

Who do you want to be closer to? My sisters.

Do you prefer to use pen or pencil? Pencil, because of the ease for erasing. I only recently learned via my sister that pens with erasers now exist and blew my FUCKING mind to bits like I wasn't okay afterwards lmfao that shit is MAGIC

What is your star sign? It's Aquarius, but I've never held any faith in this kind of stuff whatsoever.

Do you like your cereal crunchy or soggy? In-between. I can't eat it once it gets to a certain point of sogginess though, but that doesn't really happen with me because I pour my breakfast and eat it immediately lol.

Do you like ice in your drinks? No, this is gonna make me sound SO stereotypical American but I absolutely hate when it waters a drink down and even more so how like the majority of drinks you get anywhere are mostly just ice, like I didn't pay for ice.

Do you address older people by their first or last name? Eh, I'd say it depends. By this point in my life I'm pretty sure it's mostly first names now, though.

If money was not a factor, how would you live your life? Lots of traveling, and I know I'd just pay to not be my weight anymore. Way more tattoos, a house, and more pets. I would absolutely do lots of charity stuff too and help especially my loved ones however I can.

Do you prefer swimming in pools or in the ocean? I feel safer and chiller in a nice clean pool, but the ocean is way more fun! It's very good at yanking my worries away for the time, too.

What is one thing you would want to teach your children? In the hypothetical they ever exist, just being a good person is the main thing: to act with kindness, peace, and empathy. I would put a lot of emphasis on them caring for themselves too, both physically and mentally, and to never be ashamed of being themselves and shooting for the stars. I would ensure they know proper bodily autonomy early too; if my kid doesn't want to hug someone, they don't fucking have to, and I'm not sugarcoating the proper names of their body parts and to never let someone touch your body that you don't want, and if they do you let me know bc I will go to jail <3

Where do you feel the safest? At home, especially when both Mom and Girt are here.

Anything you're looking forward to this month? Yeah, on the 26th I get my tattoo finished and also am having dinner with Girt's family.

Do you have a loud or more soft laugh? I am the WHOLE fuckin pack of hyenas okay

Do you like to dip your fries in a frosty or ice cream? No, I tried that pretty late in my life and I really did not get the hype.

Are there any things coming up that you have to travel for? No.

Would you consider adoption? No, it wouldn't be for me personally.

Do you have a bad habit? Yes, I jump to conclusions and catastrophize severely, often relating around someone being mad at or annoyed by me, but there are plenty of other instances. I know there's more, but I don't really feel like thinking about this on a nice day haha

Have you ever slept with a member of the opposite sex without having sex? lmfao yes, this is such a juvenile question, sharing the same bed as someone doesn't make it so you bang every time you get in it, dude.

Have you ever had a crush on someone “too young” for you? No.

Have you ever been called a bitch? Yes, I kinda doubt any adult woman hasn't been at SOME point.

Would you rather pierce your tongue or lip? I'm happy with just the vertical labret I have on my bottom lip now, but after having my tongue pierced already and just damaging my teeth, I won't get another one. I've THOUGHT about getting what would technically be snake bites I guess and change the jewelry to a small spike, but I feel like three pieces of jewelry on just my bottom lip might get annoying.

What did you buy last time you went to the store? Mom bought milk, some steak, strawberries, some shrimp, and lettuce earlier; I only know because she complained about how expensive just that was, haha.

Do you like salsa that has fruit in it? No.

Are you scared of snakes? No, and I assure you you will never be more afraid of a snake than that snake is of you. I adore them.

Do you like hard or soft pretzels better? SOFT, ugh that sounds so good right about now.

Have you ever painted a room? Not me personally, but as a kid I remember during one of my grandmother's visits, she and my parents and maybe some friends painted the house I grew up in. My grandma was always very good with house decor and just making the inside of a house look good, and they did this cool horizontal split between a light and darker shade of blue with some sort of cool (I think it was kinda floral?) divider in the center. It was really pretty, buuuut the people who moved in after us immediately burnt the house to a fuckin crisp so I'm sure the remade house is different inside.

#survey #surveys #random questions #personal questions

0 notes

kookiecrumb · 2 years

Text

jjk || Miracleworker

wc: 1.8K

summary: You're too obvious about your obsession with Jungkook. He could teach you a thing or two, and he does.

tags: yandere!jk x fem!yandere!reader, virgin!reader, hardcore smut, pwp, ftl, classmates au, smut (18+)

warnings: breeding kink, spit kink, breastplay, fingering, unprotected sex*(please be safe, use a condom), explicit language (words such as wh*re, sl*t), heavy dirty talk, praise kink, begging, brief restraint, macrophilia, dick bulge lol, rough sex, mention of m&f masturbation, bigdick!jk

a/n: my friend @koodak is the devil, i am sure.

You had too much time to daydream during class. Assignments were pointless, lectures were boring, and material was just recycled from last year. It didn't matter to you. You got the work done, regardless, early.

Completely uninvolved with the outside world, your imagination grew beyond simple daydreaming. You fostered entire worlds, fantasies, visions of the most indulgent nature-- the subject of which was none other than your innocent classmate.

Well-- innocent was a reach. He's devastatingly beautiful. It was specific to him. He carried himself with a confidence that was hard to ignore, his nose twitched every time he found something particularly funny. He seldom participated in class or any group activities, opting to work by himself, instead. He was addictive to stare at, a tall glass of water, and you were a thirsty girl.

You swore you'd catch him looking back sometimes, with a tiny smirk that disappeared the second it appeared on his face. He would shoot you a confused, slightly annoyed glare whenever you stared too long.

In reality his eyebrows furrowed in confusion, but in your twisted little mind, you dreamed about the way they would look knitting into one another with sweat dripping from his forehead while his hips snapped up to abuse your hungry cervix.

Truthfully, he was a master of delusion. Creating the illusion that he was never and would never be interested in you. Of course it was a guise. It was a game he played with you.

In fact, he'd come home every night and pull his cock out, touch himself to the thought of you sitting on his face. He'd stroke himself to mimic your tightness, using his own saliva as lube imagining your squelching cunt clenching around his fat cock in long, thorough strokes. He just wasn't an amateur, unlike you. So cute. You thought you could hide your little thing from him.

He knew you, Y/N. No use in hiding, no use in playing it off. He just liked watching you, in every possible sense. The way you bit your pens when you were concentrating on your work, the way you crossed your legs whenever you looked over at him.

He desperately wanted to kiss the lips that kissed your coffee cups…to fuck the pussy that hid beneath that sad excuse for a school skirt. He could rip it off of you, and leave the flimsy fabric torn, discarded on his bedroom floor. That's not a threat, it's a promise.

You were so smart. He ogled over how smart you were, always finishing before everyone else so that you could sit back and relax.

He knew it was only a matter of time before he'd get his hands on you. Tonight he does, and it's everything you'd both imagined and more.

"You stare at me in math class. You keep looking over at me like I don't know from those gaping eyes what you think about, when your legs are pressing against one another trying to focus on that lesson...do you even remember what she was teaching that day or do you just remember the pants that I was wearing?"

"What color were they, y/n?" He yanks your restraints towards his face so that your eyes meet his, his leering face inches away from yours.

"Slut. Fucking whore. Is all you think about me screwing you, is all you think about me throwing you around and stretching your cunt with my massive cock?"

"You're going to fucking answer me, little cockslut," his thumb sinks into your mouth, pressing into your tongue, your breath quivering with excitement.

"Yes, fuck~ that's all...that's what I think about, it's all I think about," you cry, and you feel his hands smooth their way to your little red lace panties and tug the material out.

"Red," he pushes you back on to the bed and breaks out into a devilish smile."My favorite color, and you knew that because I said it when we first introduced ourselves to the class, icebreakers."

"You little fuck."

"Feel a man's pulse from his cock under you, grinding and rubbing on that cunt while I suck on your fucking tits," His hands travel upwards and, between his two fingers, he pinches the nubs lightly. "Cute."

Nothing can conceal his desire, lust, playfulness, curiosity and primal need.You shiver. His lips wrap around the bud, his left hand tending to the other as he kisses on it, messily taking it between his teeth and sucking roughly.

His head between your breasts, he stares up at you with those innocently deadly eyes, and you drink in the sight."There's a cure for girls who can't stop staring at men's cocks in public."

"My mouth can do miracles, cockslut."

"Cum, shaking for it, screaming from it alone and I will...but I can't ignore the fact that when you masturbate,"

"When you fill up that little pussy of yours with your hungry fingers,"

"You scream from just the thought of having my dick inside of you." An overwhelming hunger overcomes him, manifesting in need to fill you with his seed.

"This dick," Jungkook places his inked hand over his bulge, playing with his as if it's nothing at all. He strokes it through his clothes, hissing and bucking into his palm, his jaw slacking into a sloppy smile.

"This monster of a cock is going to fill you with my fucking kids,"

"And they'll talk. Trust me, knowing my friends and their friends, they'll talk about how you're carrying my baby as a senior,"

"I need to fuck it into you first, right?" He chuckles."Take all your clothes off, it's annoying me."

You strip frantically, unable to ignore how gushy you were from just the way he talked about handling your body--His thumb splits your labia. A thick, delicious trail of your arousal stretches out, cloudy white. He sucks the side of his thumb where you're connected.

He tugs his pants down, the prettiest cock you've ever seen springs out, causing you to drool out of the corner of your lips.

"Where's your lube?" He gets the hair out of his bare face. His lips are perfect, his skin glows in the most natural way, his ears are pierced and his hair flows which ever way his hands part it. God of a man.

"I...don't need it, they usually...I don't usually..." you try to find the words to say that you're basically a virgin.

"Shit, no way. You've...oh, fuck..." his dick twitches at the thought that he'd be breaking you in.

"No way," he says, like a dumbass.

"Stop...it's really not like that, I just haven't wanted anyone like I've wanted you," you rasp. He'll do it just right. After all, he is meant for you. Jungkook cups his cock in his hand, holding it to spit lube on to his length, hissing at the cool feeling.

"I'm gonna spit on you, but it...you don't look like you need it," he warns, his thumb playing with the swollen nub above your u-spot."Getting all over yourself here…"He's distracted. Of course he is. He thought that you'd be the one staring at him all night but he's now fascinated by your body and all the different colors and oh my fucking God it's the hottest thing.

You whine, jolting at his fingers poking around."Mmn! Stop it, get inside me!!"

He gives you a surprised look."Impatient brat." He throws you around the bed, hooking you around his hips before laying down a lous smack on your ass, stinging your skin and causing you to bite down hard on your lip."You will fucking obey me. You'll listen to me, you'll comply to my every command of you and you're going to be fucking quiet and patient as I prep you."

How could you fucking be quiet when the man of your fantasies is splitting your thighs open, growling in your ear about to fuck his hot cum into your cervix. Yes, yes, fuck! Your body worships him, his body worships you in such a wonderful way, he's all yours!

You felt his hand over your ass and gasped. "Ohhh...oh my God, Kookie, your hands are on me…"That's when you feel his tip graze your lower lips, and you tense, registering the feeling of him."Ahhh...fuck, fuckkk...oh please, fuck me Jungkook fuck me~" you lean on his chest, your mouth finding purchase on his chest and sucking a deep mark on him, claiming him selfishly

His thighs spread a little wider, his hands grip you harder as he kneads your ass, picking up a coarse rhythm for you to feel every inch of that shaft, coat him with your juicy cunt...He gasps, the baritone voice wavering in your ear; his tip kisses your clit.

"Fuck, fuck...oh fuck," you whine, holding on to his back and scratching it up, clenching for him. He feels it, guiding you back down so that you can feel the stretch of his head for the very first time.

"Y/N,"

"When you look at it in class again? Remember that it fucked you like this." He speared you, your walls thrashing to welcome his dick with an intense friction. He was hot, he was heating up, swallowing his spit. He turned his head down and let a fat glob of his saliva fall to where you both bonded.

"It's big, yeah?" He moved his hips in small circles to help you get used to the sheer girth of him.

"You can take it though," he hisses.

He tosses you, brings your knees to his shoulders and shallowly thrusts, experimentally until he feels you take him a little easier "That's good, yeah...like that..." he pants, his eyes meet yours.

"Juhn...mnh...mmfuck feels so good, cock~"

His hand holds your jaw agape, your lips cutely pouting into a receptive position as a bead of his spit lands on your tongue.

He smiles. He's breathing hard, his hands beneath your thighs as he sucks at the skin under your jaw, causing your mind to dizzy. "Ahhh~" you whine sharply.

"When I fuck this baby into you, you're going to get pregnant with my fucking kid, you'll be mine forever," he hums as he's smacking his dick into your squelching heat.

"You're gonna take this cum like a fucking streetwhore, I'm going to fill you with my seed and you'll carry my fucking kid, that's my fucking cum filling your cunt," he growls.

"Of course I'd be the best father, too...after all, they'll be ours,"

He leads your hands down to where you feel his dick bulging through your abdomen, his adamant thrusts yielding the sweetest sounds from your aching body. All you can do is scream.

He pacifies you, providing his thumb for you to desperately suck on as his meticulous thrusts spur on your fast-approaching orgasm.

It overflows before you can stop yourself, and you're convulsing around his cock wildly, holding on to his form as he guides your hips back down so he can paint your walls with his hot cum.

It's sticky, warm, but it feels so full, your heart is fluttering. It's unlike anything you've ever felt.

"That's a good girl," he hums. He kisses you, his hands resting around your body.

You're a good girl.

Requests are open 👐

#jungkook x reader smut #jungkook pwp #jungkook smut #jungkook x reader pwp #yandere!jungkook x reader #jungkook yandere #jungkook #jungkook x reader #bts smut #classmate!jungkook #yandere!jungkook #jungkook x you #jungkook x y/n #bts fanfiction #for fun

2K notes · View notes