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#you all have seen how i struggled w/these so im SO happy to finally post them :') such a relief too omg...
xumoonhao · 11 months
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performance team VCR // '17 Japan concert
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blu-joons · 3 years
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DAD GOT7 A⇴Z HEADCANON ⇴ Im Jaebum
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A ⇴ AFFECTION
Through his attention, Jaebum would be able to let you know the most how much he appreciated you. You’d often feel him curl up around your bump especially when he thought you were asleep and unaware of what he was doing.
B ⇴ BUMP
The changes that your bump went through were what fascinated Jaebum the most throughout your pregnancy. He loved to compare every single week at what size your baby would be, keeping a book especially on it. He’d measure with his arms often around your bump too, waiting each week until his hands could no longer meet as a result of your bump being so big.
C ⇴ CRAVINGS
At times, he thought your cravings were crazy, especially when you’d ask him to fetch a jar of pickles. He’d barely be able to stay in the same room as you as he hated the smell so much, but as you always reminded him, you were eating for two, and just the mention of your baby was enough to keep him in the room to keep you company whilst you ate.
D ⇴ DUE DATE
Jaebum would be calm about your pregnancy, until the week before your due date arrived. The realisation would hit him like a tonne of bricks, as he felt the pressures of the responsibility begin to weigh him down. The less mobile you became, the scarier it got for him too as you were usually so independent, seeing how hard you struggled every day, sometimes he couldn’t wait for your due date to arrive and see you as you, again.
E ⇴ EXCITEMENT
He definitely had his times when he’d try and downplay his excitement, but in reality, Jaebum was beyond excited to become a father. He’d always had a family in his plans for his long-term future but knowing that he was going to become a father with you was much more of an achievement then he could have ever seen him reaching. He’d often have to sit in disbelief that he was lucky enough to be in the position that he was.
F ⇴ FAMILY
Being an only child, Jaebum was keen to have his parents around as much as possible as it could potentially be their only experience of a grandchild too. They were protective of Jaebum as an only child anyway, and with that, they were protective of you too, but especially so during your pregnancy. Anything that either of you needed would be solved by them in a heartbeat, all you ever had to do was ask.
G ⇴ GETTING READY
He was used to organising the boys and keeping everything in check, and so Jaebum played on those skills to get ready for your baby’s arrival too. Whilst you were often flustered, he was a lot calmer and a lot more organised too. By the time you’d often composed yourself, the job would have already been sorted by him.
H ⇴ HEARTBEAT
Jaebum didn’t tend to get emotional often, but the sound of his baby’s heartbeat was enough to set him off. The two of you had often talked about how the heartbeat felt like such a landmark in pregnancy, and so when it finally happened for the two of you, an emotional reality really began to settle in for him.
I ⇴ “I LOVE YOU”
Every day, Jaebum would remind you that he loved you, but especially on the bad days that you had. When you were uncomfortable or in pain, that would be when he reminded you that he loved you the most, desperate to find the right words that would at least try and bring you some comfort whilst you were hurting.
J ⇴ JEALOUSY
If anything, the other members were jealous of Jaebum and how he’d managed to settle down rather than him being jealous of anything. They all knew he was going to be a great father, but seeing his family grow and the two of you really come together was something many of them could still only dream of. Each of them wanted to have what you had one day, not wanting to settle anything less than the happiness the two of you shared.
K ⇴ KICKS
Every kick would always take Jaebum by surprise, for some reason he could just never get used to the feeling. Each time, his eyes would dart up to you as if it was the first time that he was feeling your baby kick. Whilst you adjusted quickly to all the little movements, Jaebum would always treat it as if it were a first.
L ⇴ LABOUR
It was by far the part that he most and least looked forward to, he was never quite sure how he felt about it. The one thing he carried with him though was the advice of his mum who had encouraged him to put his feelings to one side and only focus on you. And that was what he did, throughout the entire time, he made sure to keep himself together and make sure that you knew that he was right there supporting you.
M ⇴ MORNING SICKNESS
Whilst he wasn’t someone who dealt particularly well with sickness, Jaebum knew he had to stick it out and be there for you. His face always managed to give away that he wasn’t impressed, but when you tried to tell him that you could get through it by yourself, his head would shake and only bring you closer into him for comfort.
N ⇴ NURSERY
You had free reign when it came to the nursery, Jaebum worked under your command which you loved. Whilst you could sit back, he built all of the furniture that you picked out to make your nursery the perfect spot.
O ⇴ OBSESSION
He was obsessed with the changes in your bump, Jaebum had always been fascinated by human nature, but seeing how your body adapted with every passing day truly captured his attention and interest.
P ⇴ POST BIRTH
The two of you were wrecks for the first couple of days in your little bubble. You were terrified, especially when your little one slept, the last thing either of you wanted to do was wake them up. There was a lot of tiptoeing around until the three of you became comfortable and a routine was firmly in place.
Q ⇴ QUESTIONS
Jaebum would be full of questions whenever you went to any of your appointments, sometimes his questions wouldn’t even have anything to do with your baby, but to do with technology or something else that interested him too.
R ⇴ RANDOM FACTS
Each of the members of the group had ended up surprising you with gifts before your baby arrived, their wardrobe was full and their room perfectly decorated by the time all of them were finished spoiling your baby, all secretly vying for the spot of favourite uncle to be introduced to your baby for the very first time.
S ⇴ SCANS
Jaebum kept a photo of your scan up on his wall in the studio to use when he needed inspiration. You knew that he created storyboards whenever he was coming up with lyrics, but the photo of your scan seemed like the missing piece of the puzzle that he had been missing out on all along to really finish off his songs.
T ⇴ TEST
You’d had a funny feeling for some time that you could have been pregnant, eventually plucking up the courage to ask Jaebum to buy you a test. It was just precaution, but neither of you could have expected it to come back positive.
U ⇴ ULTRASOUND
Jaebum made the time for every appointment, it never mattered how busy his schedule was, you were always his number one priority when you needed him, he was there.
V ⇴ VISITS
His parents were the first to visit the three of you, much to the disappointment of the boys. Meeting their first grandchild was just as overwhelming as the experience was for Jaebum and seeing them with his child was emotional for him too.
W ⇴ WAITING
It was only when you’d get impatient, would Jaebum get impatient, other than that, he was usually relaxed and not allowing himself to get too carried away by the situation.
X ⇴ XXXX
He would often trail kisses along your bump whenever you were having a particularly restless night. Jaebum always hoped that a kiss from him would work in the same way as a kick from your baby and keep him nice and calm.
Y ⇴ YOU
You were his best friend, the only one he ever wanted to experience fatherhood alongside.
Z ⇴ ZZZ
Despite there being many times when he was reluctant to get up, whenever you needed anything in the night, Jaebum was there to get it. After all, the sleepless nights were probably something he was going to have to get used to.
---
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In derry girls, what did you think of the episode where clare came out? Im irish (republic) and gay so i love that it was included, but some of the language used makes me uncomfortable i guess? I get that NI in the 90s wasnt very accepting but the directors have said that they already portrayed it through rose coloured glasses so having michelle say d*ke feels unnecessary. I love the show though and can certainly look past it! I was just interested in what you thought :)))
Hey anon!
Personally I love this episode of Derry Girls! In fact it’s probably my favourite episodes. I already liked Clare as a character throughout the series, probably because I relate to her a bit too much, so to have her be revealed as gay was just like the icing on the cake. Good representation for northern Irish characters are few and far between, and gay northern Irish characters are basically non existent. Derry Girls was this hit TV show that provided many with the first chance to see themselves represented meaningfully on TV, and that includes myself.
However, I think there’s a lot of really important stuff in this episode that people either don’t notice or just don’t really talk about, which I do understand because Derry Girls is, at the end of the day, a comedy and it’s much more fun to quote characters like Aunt Sarah saying “you cannot move for lesbians these days” than to think about the darker side of Northern Ireland.
(T/W for homophobia discussion!!!)
(Also this sort of turned into a ramble about acceptance by the end of the post but I just have a lot of feelings on what Derry girls represents and I feel like non northern Irish viewers maybe don’t catch onto that because they don’t have the necessary context)
Derry Girls, as a show, is so interesting and personal to me because it manages to perfectly strike the balance between presenting Northern Ireland as a deeply flawed and divided country, but also presenting it as a place where people can be happy and live their lives to the fullest despite the ever present danger of the troubles. And that’s a genuinely refreshing portrayal of N.I that we usually don’t get. However I’d argue that if Derry Girls doesn’t at least try and illustrate, to some extent, the causal and very rampant homophobia of northern Ireland then it runs the risk of romanticising Northern Ireland at the time, which I think is incredibly dangerous. I do think that the show is intentionally more digestible and does filter things through rose tinted glasses, however I’d argue that simply glossing over the homophobia would have actually been a bit disrespectful to the queer history of Northern Ireland and could erase the experiences and struggles of the LGBTQ community in N.I, both then and now. If the show doesn’t acknowledge that things were shitty then we paint an inaccurate picture of what it was like, and arguably still is like, to be gay in Northern Ireland. And considering that Derry Girls is one of the very few good depictions of Northern Ireland, it’s incredibly important that it’s an honest depiction.
You specifically asked about Michelle, but I think it’s important to talk about Michelle and Erin in relation to one another, and how they are both products of their time and of a deeply homophobic society.
(Now I’m going to briefly discuss Michelle’s use of the d-slur here however I just want to acknowledge that I’m probably not the best person to talk about this since it’s a lesbian specific slur and I’m not a lesbian. I welcome any additions to this post!)
I think Michelle sort of represents the overt and “loud” homophobia that’s present in our society. Michelle saying the d-slur is far from the first homophobic thing she says. I mean It’s literally a running gag in series one that she calls James “gay” constantly. And the sad thing is that Michelle’s off handed comments throughout the series are incredibly realistic to what you’d hear in Northern Ireland even today. I remember the f-slur being chanted during break time at my primary school, without anyone fully understanding what that word meant. Michelle is a representation of the homophobia that’s deeply ingrained into N.I to the point where it’s not even thought about or even seen as an issue. I mean...no one ever really talks about Michelle’s comments. Now whether or not they had to include her saying a slur specifically to illustrate the homophobia of N.I is not for me to say. You could change that sentence in the script and I think the point of Michelle representing “loud” and homophobia would still stand.
On the other hand...I think Erin represents the much more insidious and “quiet” homophobia.
Firstly, she has no issue with capitalising off a very personal essay for her own gain, shrugs off any protests that this might be wrong and doesn’t consider how her actions may hurt the writer of this piece (who is later revealed to be Clare).
Even the language she uses is a bit uncomfortable, saying that “a real life lesbian walks among us”. Are lesbians wild animals or mythical creatures? That seems to be what Erin is implying here. Plus Erin tries to make it out to others such as Sister Michael that she’s doing this because she genuinely believes in equal rights and wishes to stick up for the LGBT community, but when Clare actually tries to come out Erin is clearly confused and she reacts very badly. I mean, Erin literally says she doesn’t want Clare to come out and demands she get back in the closet, and you can see how hurt Clare is by this reaction. And this scene is kind of played for laughs and I think that straight viewers probably found Erin’s reaction quite funny...but this scene hit way too close to home for me. It’s the classic “I have nothing against gay people, but I’d just rather I didn’t have a gay friend/child/co-worker because they make me uncomfortable” that’s way too common in Northern Ireland. It’s the idea that people can present themselves as liberal and open minded, but when finally confronted with something that doesn’t fit their narrative, their societal conditioning kicks in.
As a queer woman, it was never Michelle’s causal homophobia that made me uncomfortable, it was Erin’s reaction...because it hit way too close to home. It’s a perfect representation of the “quiet” homophobia that’s still a massive issue in Northern Ireland today.
(Also the context of when Derry Girls was released is super important! Series one of Derry Girls was released in 2018...but Gay marriage wasn’t actually legalised in Northern Ireland until January of 2020 and even then it was quite contested by conservatives. Now I’m not saying there’s social commentary here but that’s absolutely what I’m saying.)
Now I’m not saying that Michelle or Erin themselves are homophobic, nor am I saying that they’re bad people. I think that they are teenagers that have absorbed a lot of homophobic rhetoric due to the time and the society that they live in. Although Erin’s reaction to Clare trying to come out was painful to watch because it felt so real, I don’t think her reaction was malicious. Erin is a teenager who has grown up in a homophobic society and now doesn’t really know how to react to this new reality and probably didn’t realise how hurtful she was being to Clare. (This isn’t me trying to excuse her reaction, again I am part of the LGBT community and I’ve experienced that exact same reaction from people, it’s me trying to understand Erin’s reaction). Erin and Michelle have both absorbed rhetoric from their deeply homophobic society, and unfortunately this rhetoric continues.
Plus I just want to comment on this idea of acceptance and change in Derry Girls. Derry Girls is set in the time of great change in Northern Ireland, where people were sort of starting to accept that people are allowed to be British or Irish or both. But this process was messy and it wasn’t instantaneous. And the acceptance of the LGBTQ community in Northern Ireland was the exact same. It didn’t just happen overnight. It was a slow and messy process of change, of people re-evaluating their previous beliefs and being given the chance to grow as people and to learn how to accept others. That’s not to say people haven’t made mistakes in the past, because they have, but they’re willing to take the steps to change. I‘ve always thought the LGBTQ subplot of Derry Girls is sort of a parallel to the overall process of change in Northern Ireland in a political sense. And I think that flies over so many people’s heads because they don’t have that context of the political situation in N.I.
(And this theme of acceptance is seen again in the series finale of series 2 with James! ✨ Thematic consistency ✨ )
Because at the end of the day, Clare is accepted by the group. In fact, we see both the teenagers and the adults actively take steps to make her feel loved, welcome and accepted. My favourite moment will always be Granda Joe saying “you’re a very talented people” to Clare in the most earnest voice. Clare is still loved by her friends and although they don’t exactly know what they’re doing, they do try and show their support for her. They absolutely make mistakes, and they did hurt Clare, but they’re trying and I think that stands for a lot, especially at the time.
And I think all of what I discussed was absolutely necessary to Derry Girls. Derry Girls might be a somewhat rose tinted portrayal of Derry in the troubles, but it never tries to romanticise the situation that the teenagers were in (because no one should be romanticising the troubles). I think that this stance of portraying the harsh reality of homophobia in N.I is equally important to the narrative of Derry Girls. I see my own experiences in Clare, despite the fact it’s 30 years later, so if they didn’t at least attempt to show the homophobia in Ireland it would have felt disingenuous and too “perfect”. Again, I’m not saying that Michelle using the d slur was the right way to go about showing the “loud” homophobia of Northern Ireland. That’s not my decision to make. However, just because Derry Girls is making efforts to present Northern Ireland in a more digestible way to audiences (especially non northern Irish audiences) doesn’t mean they shouldn’t also acknowledge the reality of Northern Ireland at the time.
(This all kind of makes it sound like I want Clare to get hate crimed which I obviously do not want. I think the way that Derry Girls showed the issues in Northern Ireland were perfect and very much necessary, minus the use of the d-slur specifically which wasn’t necessary to the plot.)
Anyway thank you so much for the ask anon! This was much more rambly than my usual posts but I just really have a lot of opinions on Derry girls because it does mean a lot to me and it often does hit close to home.
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Pink Chains pt Five
Punk! Kyotani x Bubbly F! reader. Aka my favorite cliche trope. It lives in my head every second of the day.
Kyotani owns a grunge /punk apparel shop after leaving the Sendai Frogs after a incident with the Black Jackals. He designs his own clothes and hires Oikawa & Iwaizumi as his employees. Everything goes smoothly for awhile, till you walk in; pink dress, big smile , and bubbly personality. His whole life stops in that moment. 
W! Brief Violence
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Before you and Kyo could go to the zoo he had to drive everyone back to the beach so they could drive home. Yahaba was hiding in the back seat by the window , still red in the face. Oikawa was next to him and constantly teasing Yahaba over you , Iwaizumi was on the right by the window in the back, Mattsun was in the passenger seat and Kyotani was driving,,, with you on his lap.
“Its fine” he told you. I mean hes not gonna let one of his friends hold you so .. And besides, this was funner. You held onto his neck giggling while you peppered kisses on his neck the whole way to the beach. Mattsun was the last to leave Kyotanis car, he wanted to check on his red panda tattoo on you and you happily showed him it. The red was finally all healed up and the whole tattoo looked very nice to him. He pat your head and said goodbye to his friend as he exited the car closing the door. Kyotani took off and plugged the directions into his cars touch screen.
“Kyo? Should I move to the seat?” you asked him, wiggling on his lap as he drove.
“Your fine right here on me sweetie.” he told you, nuzzling his cheek into yours.
So you sat there the whole time, giggling each time someone did a double take as they passed. You told Kyo about your day and what the girls said to you too. It still pissed him off but it was taken care of now.
“Kyo?” you were rubbing at his chest.
“Hm?”
“Are you okay after this morning?”
He thought on it for a few minutes, the only sound was the music coming from his car. He groaned heavily and placed a hand on your thigh pulling you closer to him. “Yeah, im okay sweetie”
“Promise?”
“Promise” he gave you a gentle kiss as he pulled into the zoo's parking area.”before we go in i have to tell you one thing though”
“What is it?” you were about to open the door but he had stopped you, causing you to get all pouty and puffy in the face with him. Kyotani smiled and kissed your cheek laughing lightly.
“So i know one of the employees and i need to see if hes working today”
“Okay!!” you opened the door wiggling off Kyos lap getting out and Kyo was quick to follow you and pull you back to him locking his arms around your hips as he hip bumped his car door shut.
“Kyo!!!!!”
“Hm?” he kissed along your neck holding your wiggling body with a smile on his face.
“The pandas!!” you whined with a big smile on your face til you felt his fingers start to move over your tummy .” KYO!! Tickles!!!”
“Okay okay, but please stay close to me okay?”
You whipped around to grab his ring hand squeezing it tight. “You stay close!! Dont want anyone stealing you away”
He laughed walking you up to the entrance to pay and buy a ticket. “Ive already been stolen by the best person sweetie.im not goin anywhere”
*
Miyagi Zoo was a small zoo, basically a big circle with some attractions down separate walk ways that lead to birds, a petting zoo and the gift shop. But it all looped back around to the entrance.
The first animals were the lions; you were so excited but the display glass was occupied by some people and you could not see. Kyo pulled you close while he waited for the people to move, he could see them but that was because he was 5 ‘ 11, he did not want to wait too long since he still had to find his friend and see the rest of the zoo so he moved himself behind you , wrapped his arms around your hips and lifted you up into the air so you could see the lions who were asleep on the rocks enjoying the sun. you had grabbed onto Kyotanis shoulders to steady yourself and people looked back to see you and the look on Kyos face, they quickly moved and he smugly walked closer with you still in the air. The glass was cold against your hands when you touched it to steady yourself to look in. it was two males and three females all asleep enjoying the sun. Kyotani had never seen a lion before so he was equally as excited but seeing that excited grin on your face just made it 10x better. He set you down and you gave him a big kiss on the lips , you also grabbed his hand running off to the next animals.
The second animals were the timber wolves and that was .. an interesting experience; no one was looking at the animals so you and Kyo were free to get right up to the glass to look for them. They appeared to be hiding and you did not want to leave without seeing at least one so Kyo crouched down next to you to look into the enclosure. A pile of leaves was moving up and down and he could see a couple paws sticking out. “Sweetie, down here. ones asleep” he told you. You folded your dress behind you to crouch down next to him and you gasped a little loudly once you saw it. He was asleep, the sign said this enclosure had 6 timber wolves in it but they all must be asleep somewhere.
Kyotani liked wolves, they reminded him of his friends and they were very misunderstood creatures , like him. You leaned into his side placing your hand on his wolf sleeve and Kyo laid his head on yours as you both watched the wolf sleep. The other animals could wait a little longer to be seen.
After a few more minutes Kyo was about to get up with you when a grey wolf came out from under the leaves and right over to the glass. Kyotani expected you to latch on to him and be a little scared but instead he watched you wave and say hello to the wolf. He pulled you to him giving your cheek a kiss, you were perfect.. So so perfect.. The wolf stared at you both for a little while till new people started to come over and dashed off to hide. Kyotani helped you up and you both made your way to the petting zoo holding hands.
The little goats refused to interact with Kyotani.. It was kinda funny. They loved you and loved to eat at your dress while all they did with Kyo was scream at him. People were staring because you were giggling trying to feed the baby sheeps with a brown goat eating your dress and a black goat screaming its head off at Kyotani. A pig came over as well to use Kyo as a rubbing post for an itch and he was not very happy but what the hell, hes lucky hes a cute pig. The screaming was starting to get to him though and you had to get some food for Kyo to get on the goats good side. He held the food out and instantly the goat stopped his screaming to munch on the food. The quiet was a relief for everyone…
The last animals were the red pandas but Kyo was preventing you from getting close to the enclosure, he had his arm hooked around your waist and seemed to be looking around with his phone out.
“Kyo!!!! Im gonna tell Iwaizumi!!!”
“Pft oh yeah Sweetie?” he leaned down to nibble your neck. “Whats Iwaizumi gonna do?”
“Something!!!” you struggled against his grip but you were not getting free. You could see the big tree that was the main part of the exhibit and a bunch of tall glass with smaller trees and climbing toys spread out all around .. just a little.. Closer..!
“Mad Dog ! over here!”
“There he is. Okay sweetie this way” he led you to the side of the exhibit over to an employee who had a big smile on his face . his name tag said Takahiro on it.
Kyotani bumped his shoulder against the man and Taka did the same saying hello to his friend.”this her?” he asked, giving you a big smile.
“Yep, Sweetie this is my friend Takahiro, he was on the team too”
“Nice to meet you!!!” you beamed .
“Aww. shes adorable, you ready ?”
“ready? “ you turned to Kyo and he pulled you with him gently.”but Kyo the pandas…”
“Cmon sweetie.” he locked his arm around yours as Taka led you both past the Employees Only area next to the exhibit.
Taka opened a door and Kyo snuck you in with Taka closing the door behind him. “Okay,” Taka said. “15 minutes max Kyotani”
“Sure sure” he moved you closer to what looked like the inside of the exhibit. “Stand right here” he told you.
You hold his hand tight unsure of what was happening and heard Taka whistle a tune. Soon enough you realized and got the biggest smile on your face.
Four little red pandas ran over flopping all over each other and right into your legs to rub on them . “KYO!!!” you instantly crouched down to pet them and give each one a hug, you were also a crying mess.
Kyotani nudged his friend after snapping a picture of you with the pandas. “Thanks Takahiro”
“Mmm sure, i dont just let anyone back here ya know”
“Yeah yeah, trust me i appreciate it “ he looked over to see you holding a red panda and trying to pet each one at the same time.
“Hows the store? The guys?”
“All good, i made up with Yahaba too.”
“Really? Thats great Mad Dog, proud of you. You look like your doing good.”
“Im doing amazing now,” he gestured to you. “Never been better Takahiro”
Taka nudged his friend teasing him over how sappy he was being and you made sure you pet every panda at least 10 times before it was time to leave. You thanked Takahiro and he waved his hand saying it was not a problem.
*
After Taka escorted you both out Kyo took you to the Gift Shop where he bought you a red panda plush and a red panda bag that had a fake tail hanging off it. The gift shop also had a cheetah display that said they save a cheetah with each purchase. He bought 6 of them. It was time to leave after the gift shop and you were just so happy with your day, everything was perfect. Kyotani opening up to you, saving you from the girls at school, the surprise at the zoo. You were falling deeper and deeper for him.
It was a good day for him too, after a rocky morning everything turned out great. Making up with Yahaba helped a lot and he was happy to have his friend back. He took care of those dumb girls that were bothering you and got to take you too the zoo . seeing your smile all day was the icing on the cake for him. Things were going so good with you and he never wanted it to change, he never wanted to mess it up and wanted to hold onto you forever.
When you got to the car you asked Kyo if you could go for ice cream before heading home and he agreed, one was close by so you both could walk to it. It was dark now and Kyo wanted to invite you too sleep at his place tonight. You were almost at the ice cream shop now but something stopped you.
“Kyo? Did you hear that?”
“Rr..”
“It sounded like a kitten?” he said looking around.
“I think over by the bench there, i gotta go see, it might by by itself..”
Kyotani was unsure about letting you go by yourself but he was close enough to the bench if you needed him. “Okay sweetie, come right back please.” he held your hand a little longer before letting go , he watched you hurry off and he leaned on the ice cream shop to wait, browsing his phone.
“Kyotani…?” it was a … familiar voice.
Kyo looked up and his heart nearly stopped.
“Kitty...kitty,,,” you crouched down looking under the bench to see a scared little kitten hiding under it. “Hey there.. Im not gonna hurt you.. Cmere baby” you held your arm out and the kitten sniffed it.
“It is you.” the voice got closer and Kyotani was frozen.”Bastard what was your deal back then huh?”
“...i..” he squeezed his phone trying to come up with words. No , no, this cant be happening now. Stay calm Mad Dog..
“Thats it.. Cmere..” you cooed the kitten out to you and picked it up hugging its shivering body. “There there.. Your safe now, ill take care of you, wait till you meet Kyo, hes a great-”
CRASH
You looked up to see something… something you thought you would never see. Kyotani hit the brick wall hard . he wiped the blood from his chin and grabbed a spikey haired man punching him directly in the jaw.
“Did you hear me?? Fuck was your problem huh?” he stepped closer. Kyotani put his phone away and stepped away trying to focus on this guy and see where you were. “Can we do this another time?” he asked putting his hands up, he was shaking,
“I dont want any trouble” he told him.
“Oh you dont? But giving me a black eye that was swollen shut for two weeks is fine? “ he grabbed Kyotani by the shirt and Kyotani was slammed into the wall.
“Fuck you Kyotani if you thi-” he punched him, right in the jaw. “Get the FUCK off me Bokuto!!!” he grabbed Bokuto by the shirt slamming him to the ground.
“Kyo….?” you were frozen in place and your heart nearly jumped up your throat when you saw him punch Bokuto in the mouth.
**
@galagcica @kozushiki @zopzoop
@haikyuu-but-low-iq @milkbreadcat
@derpeedoo @squeaky-ducky
*
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seoafin · 3 years
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jjk & tower of god chapter on the same day,,, i spent all of my brainjuice talking abt tog w some friends + working on my wip so this one might be incoherent LMAO but nsjdhfjd this my 2 cents for the chp (1) - 🐱
first of all, the zenins shld just eat shit 🥰 the bar is just nonexistant now 😭😭😭
also maki’s mother said sth that hits way too close to home for me too🥴
the maki & mai, megumi & tsumiki "make a place where they are happy” parallels...mai,, maki wanted a place where u'd be happy!!! 😭😭😭 good points abt any interesting nuances the original jpn might have had though
ALSO MUSCLE MAKI IS HERE
and lmao megumi's "ew no" face ,,, i didn't think he could make a face like that JDJJDJD ,, once again i think his outsider-insider status is interesting but the amount of ppl counting on him/leaning on him bc of strategic position is a lot. ig this is what kamo meant by supporting the 3 families,,,, gojou indeed is playing the long game. megumi in the meantime, very persistent in not getting more involved in clan politics, not using power that is offered to him, or leveraging it - in a way it is good, and it also makes sense with "stress is other ppl" but is interesting from a structural pov. megumi may not rly give a shit abt the rest of the jujutsu world. if the ppl close to him are affected, then he cares. otherwise, forget it.
also im interested in power implications here bcs it sound a little like there’s a slight split b/w leadership and everyday zenins and im curious what it's like if u have no connection to the top of the clan,, and again higher ups being unaffiliated with the 3 clans so they have to appeal to them. curious what other talents the gojou clan have and what they're known for bc clearly it's not just gojou, they still have power without him and still have a stake in the shifting power structure. kamo must be busy too...
MAKIIIIII ,,, honestly my heart hurts a little seeing her getting beat up in recent chapters. but i’m rly happy,, shes FINALLY getting the focus she deserves and i’m confident she will make a recovery and she IS in fact the one leading efforts on the zenin side. im rly hopeful she can take over the clan one day and no longer say she's not good enough
that stomach wound is bad news though so im wondering how she will come back from that,, that she didn't know her own father's abilities says a lot, too. i wonder if she could see the extension of his blade, or if she hasn't been able to see/understand many ppl abilities
im hopeful for next chp now. u can do it maki!!!!
flashing back on these bits, it makes more sense now why megumi wasn't melting down post-shibuya,, seems most information came to him in a sort of timely and calm way? also i rly have to wonder if gojou did not spend a decade plotting in front him bcs he's done it before,,,, like the whole clan head scene in megumi's middle school years....in a way i imagine he wouldve seen that gojou come out of the high school and watch him get more serious as he acquired even more skin in the game
all the time though i wonder abt megumi's tendency toward inertia and nonaction to things that would seemingly give him power and trying to understand it and that IS him being selfish and that IS,, imo the biggest indication of what he actually does or doesn't want. he wants it, he will act and work on it immediately himself. he doesn't like it? act like it doesn't exist. it make me want to shake him around like NO!! megumi pay attention!!! But his reaction to this clan stuff is a contrast to his behavior in recent chapters imo
and more mahjong references,,, between this and yuuji’s pachinko,, i wonder abt the undercurrent of gambling haha. a gamble for the shaman world and who will come out on top? a contrast to the flowy ocean imagery that connects shaman stuff out to the rest of the world
also this ,,,, there's that one jp tweet (i cant find it again😞) that talks about how toji, as the point of distortion, created megumi, who is currently playing a potential convergence/healing/uniting role (if he actually takes it on as a responsibility lol) and connects this back to the medicine buddha,,, whose mudra (hand sign) is used for chimera shadow garden. with the commentary abt ppl with heavenly restriction needing to know what to throw away in order to become strong or tap into their full strength and toji’s commentary at the end of fight with gojou,,  i actually always felt that toji died not having been entirely resolved with himself bc he talks abt going against the self that decided to forget abt self-respect, to live without thinking abt himself or others,,, in a way, living selfishly, for himself, by ignoring anything immediate and i think he succeeded for a while bc he didnt even remember megumi's name. he remembers it when he talks to getou abt him being thankful for toji not killing him bc of potential drawbacks
and at the very end he thinks of megumi again and that last act does think of someone else, like a "life before your eyes" moment where toji thinks about how the zenin's treatment of him led him there or how his return to shibuya ends with him remembering how he gave megumi back to the zenin,,, i think atm of his death he was starting to think he did want to care, in a different way, or that he needed a different paradigm. or,, maybe he was just starting to realize how far the zenin thinking had set into him
so we dont rly talk abt that being an enlightenment moment for toji but i kind of think it was. that megumi has the potential to become a pivotal piece as a legacy of distortion is interesting. i dont actually think toji set up everything intentionally bc he didnt know megumi's ability, and i dont think he wouldve thought that far. i think a lot of the heir and inheritance stuff is sth naobito set in after seeing megumi's development under gojou. it's clear now everyone has been keeping eyes on everyone else
at some point there's some interesting discussion to be had abt megumi and privilege - i'm surprised the canon characters dont hate him more for having stuff just fall into his lap, and so i liked that maki pointed this out that he could use this and he shld bc theres a frustration there - and yet at the same time megumi himself seemingly feels very little attachment to the zenin and the shaman world still. he just cares abt his little circle of people, and it's a very intentional choice, based on his good/bad ppl thing
u cant really affect the entire world, but u can assert urself on the environment around u and decide what u do and dont act on. this part of megumi is more teenage boy and kind of toji-like, i think,,, hence the emphasis on action
u express ur effect and existence through action, who u kill or who u save. toji having very little, while so much falls into megumi's lap while he doesn't want it, doesn't want to acknowledge it, likely doesn't want to take part in a system he doesn't like or, having been raised under gojou's wing, resents or finds corrupt or useless, or doesn't even think on bc he thinks its above his pay grade and gojou's there - this is also megumi's moment to solidify his own direction and commit to working in the system or out of it
the "not caring" is a defensive measure in a way too, i think. i dont think megumi is Big Good and wants to save everyone and everything and the world to be good and pure, i tend to think of him as a resigned chaotic neutral, who wishes he could be good orz
ANYWAY i think there's some interesting juxtapositions with the whole toji > megumi thing, that someone who is born without, restricted, births and creates someone full of blessings. its very shaman-like, action then reaction
AND i wish u luck on ur final paper (bless ur eyes to see incels bc i’ll just log off for the day when i saw one (1) of them on the net) AND DONT FORGET TO TAKE A REST,, the self care is much needed me thinks <333 (2) - 🐱
i love u 🥺🥺😭😭😭 you take care of yourself too!!!
also ur right...all this political intrigue im so curious i need to know how the jujutsu world is structured in terms of the higher ups and the clans. like i assumed that the three clan elders WERE to some extent also part of the higher ups???? but now it seems that the higher ups are a separate entity altogether, so like checks and balances i suppose. except both the higher ups and the clans are corrupt so no balance there 😭
the chapter implied the zenins are losing when it comes to the power struggle between the three clans. im interested. i want to see them all rot!!! like i also said though it’s going to be interesting to see the state of the kamo clan though, considering “noritoshi kamo.” like what do you even say to that???? im going to be surprised if it doesn’t affect their standing in the jujutsu world but then again the kamo clan IS one of the big three.
megumi really is a character that was blessed in all regards but like. doesn’t want anything to do with it LOL he really said ‘this is a pain no thanks.’ like gojo like megumi i suppose. i agree with u the whole toji and megumi set up....genius....i also love their juxtaposition. it’s so interesting and another source of irony.
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k-i-ssmyash · 3 years
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Pls I would love to hear your analysis on why those mitski songs fit each iz boy (feel free to ignore this but if you'd like do tell bcs I think it is interesting B) )
Oh buddy you've made a mistake. You'd love to hear the analysis? Well I love to talk; I hope your ready for the absolute word vomit and rambling that's under the cut. But yeah, no, i'll never turn down asks like this! Interact with me! I'm but a simple, lonely tumblr hermit.
Let's start off with the first post containing Zim and referencing A Pearl. I tie this song in with his (fandom assumed) character development and how it effects both his mental state, Dib, and his ideology of the Irken Empire as a whole. In a way, I think a lot of us over-sympathize or find common ground with our alien and it prompts us to victimize him and excuse a lot of his actions. And for good reasons honestly? It's easy to do so consider that he was born under the rule of a tyrannical society where flaws are looked down upon. He does wrong but to him it's not exactly wrong, is it? It's unfair to judge him and scrutinize him the same way we do humans. The show is slap-stick at it's core and despite the grim and black-humor based undertones, not much is taken seriously. Although it often ends up in failure, everything he attempts to do is to better the empire, to receive recognition from the beings they hail to about the same degree as a deity. The long and short of it is that he wants to make the Tallest happy. To prove that he's worth their time and that he can live up to everything he dreamed he could be, but the truth is that he can't. He loves the people that hate him the most. It's an abusive relationship at it's finest, really. So he picks up the most unhealthy coping mechanism: Denial. He can't accept the fact that he's a fake invader, or that his Tallest weren't coming to Earth, because it would genuinely destroy him. And why wouldn't it? Pleasing his superiors and contributing to the hive-collective is encoded in him. It's all he's ever known. I specifically chose the given lines "(It's just that) I fell in love with a war and nobody told me it ended-" because that's the back-bone of Zim's character. You can take it both literally and metaphorically if you'd like. He's invader Zim. He likes being an invader because it gives him a purpose. The Tallest give him a fake mission and play into his delusion of doing good and being someone important (of being loved, even) and never truly hammer in the fact that he's exiled--not counting the unaired episode or the bit of commentary mumbled under the Tallests breath-- because they find the situation funny to an extent. (also, what gets me just in general with it is that Zim thinks that people like him but he's actually just one big joke and ow goddamn it my feelings) Main lyric(s) out of the way there I similarly associate the song to Zim's uh 'character redemption' so to say. I think he'd struggle to become accustomed to Earth and the fact that he doesn't have to rely on commands to live his life. I relate the line(s): "You're getting tired of me (and all of the things I don't talk about) / You love me so hard and I still can't sleep / It's not that I don't want you / It's not that I don't want your touch / There's a hole that you fill" With his relationship with Dib-- platonic, romantic, whatever-- and the general give and take of it all. He'd like to assimilate and believe in the freedom given by living on Earth. He wants it and in a way Dib provides the stability he needs there and it would be so, so, easy to give in to it. But he can't because the Empire continues to loom over him and his day-to-day life. As it's been proven, without Dib there to provoke Zim, the little alien falls into a depression, not unlike the one he fell into in Enter The Florpus when he saw the truth in his mission. Dib is his substitute, essentially. (there's something to be said with that relationship and how I view it but this is already dragging on and this is only the first analysis, so maybe another time.) And lastly, I'd like to think that the Pearl the song is eluding to can be compared to Zim's PAK. The whole 'Pearls are parasites that live inside of mollusks' bit can relate to the PAK and it's purpose. But I see it more in the sense that the PAK is the second brain, a computer memory drive that grants Zim access to the memories he can't bring himself to forget or delete. I.e., "And it left a pearl in my hand / And i roll it around every night just to watch it glow /
Every night, baby, that's where I go" Every time he takes a step forward, he takes two back because he just can't let go of what he knows (the Empire).
--- As for Dib and I Bet On Losing Dogs, well, it's a little more complicated and I'm still not entirely sure of my break-down here because there's so many layers to apply. Originally when I started messing around with this idea, it was going to be centered on Membrane "My baby, you're my baby, say it to me" and him loving Dib despite his flaws. And I still think it could apply. While Dadbrane doesn't support Dib's paranormal bull-shit, and he shouldn't considering the lengths Dib goes through to prove it (bus hoping, obsessive behavior, the fucking trench-coat) he does support and love his son despite the absentness. Hence the "I bet on losing dogs" and you know, Dadbrane just being there to pick him up and have his back when he really needs to. But then we get to the last line of the first verse. "Tell your baby that I'm your baby" To which Dib, in all of his edgy glory, decided to stick his big-head in to my thought process. I saw it as Dib wishing that Membrane would pick him over Science. Kind of a plea for attention? Like: Put your work away, I know you love it but you need to love me more. Dib has got to have the biggest hero-complex out of everyone in the show. He also has an inferiority-complex that compels him to try and prove himself. Quite frankly, and pun fully intended, he is the underdog. The odds are always against him and he almost never comes out victorious in the end, in that way, I feel like Dib himself is the loosing dog. His belief in the supernatural is the loosing dog. No one will ever believe him, "I bet on losing dogs / I know they're losing and I'll pay for my place" but he's too stubborn to give up. Even if he's mocked and ridiculed he would never stop trying to prove himself correct and would continue to stick to his guns. "I'll be there on their side / I'm losing by their side" He ostracizes himself from his peers by not letting belief go. He is purposely sabotaging his chance of being seen as someone other than the crazy kid.
That being said, the next line is where his Hero-complex comes back into play. "Where I'll be looking in their eyes when they're down" in Enter the Florpus, his sworn enemy was in a funk that he knew all too well. Sure, in the end he wanted to use Zim for his own gain, but before that he sympathized with him. And in a way, he possibly wouldn't know how to act if he ever did actually succeed? I couldn't help but think that Dib, who has always lost wouldn't feel like exposing Zim would be a win? He'd miss the fight. Dib would miss the struggle of being beaten down only to rise up when he finally gets some sort of substantial evidence: "I wanna feel it / I bet on losing dogs" he hopes that Zim will come up with something big and bad not because he wants him to win either, but because then Dib has something to fight against. Along with that, the one time Dib actually broke away from paranormal to go along with his father's wishes he was absolutely miserable. He was successful. He made his father happy, he could have made something out of his life but he couldn't; the appeal of Zim and their on-going stalemate was too much to resist-- "I always want you when I'm finally fine / Someone to watch me die" -- Dib is ruining himself by obsessing over the truth and Zim would be going down, right there with him. ahaha, that was a lot wasn't it? It probably didn't make sense either as it's just my personal rambling here, but I'd be interested to hear your thoughts and opinions on it all.
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for-ests · 4 years
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Always Enough- Peter Parker x Reader
Okay so this imagine was an anon request that I had previously posted, but I accidentally deleted. I didn't mean to, so here’s a re-upload. Happy finals & sorry my dumbass clicked the wrong button on tumblr mobile because im stupid
Summary (bc the request deleted w/ the post): The reader realizes she had been neglecting Peter because she was stressed over school. Peter thinks there might be another reason because she has become distant. Confrontation and angst follows!
Word count: 2, 360
✭♡✭♡✭♡✭
Finals were a killer, especially for a nursing major like yourself. The stress of it all made you want to curl up into a ball and cry. Cry for hours until you couldn't cry no more. 
But that wasn't an option. What you dreamed of becoming, something simple, yet incredibly difficult, was growing out of reach. Your hours of studying had led you nowhere, only to barely tangible grades. Grades that were barely above average. You were disappointed, discouraged, and running out of options.
What else would you do with your life? Becoming a nurse was the only thing you had ever wanted to be, it was all you knew. Ever since aliens rained in the sky, your only motive was to help the ones who couldn't help themselves. But how could you ever hope to do that when you couldn't pass biochem?
What didn't help your anxious mind was the house you had to stress over, and your minimum wage restaurant job that didn't add to your required expertise. Tears welled in your eyes as you remembered you had to lay a payment down on your ever-increasing student loans. Maybe college wasn't for you. Perhaps it was never meant to be. Your summer money was running out and fast.
Just breathe. You repeated. I don't have time to cry.
You could cry after you studied. And right now, you had barely glanced at your flashcards for more than ten minutes. It seemed like you were paralyzed, sitting in bed with your flashcards scattered around you, all of them laid out and waiting for involvement.
Just as you were about to pick up the first card, your phone buzzed beside you. Instinctively, you glanced at it, your heart dropping when you saw Peter's name flash across the screen.
Date. You had a date night, and you forgot.
"Fuck!" You cursed out loud, the tears you had tried so hard to control seeming to burst over your eyelids. How could you forget?
Peter: I'll be there in 15 minutes :D
You replied immediately, glancing at yourself in the phone's reflection. You looked terrible and distraught beyond compare.
Y/N: Peter…im so sorry I forgot, i'm not ready
Peter: oh
Y/N: i have a huge exam soon, maybe its for the best that we rain check? i'm sorry I know ive done this before but im really stressed about it
Peter: we havent talked for days, y/n, i think theres more going on than what youre telling me
Y/N: what? of course not wtf
Peter: im coming over anyways, ill be there soon
Y/N: why?
Peter: we have to talk.
Your heart dropped down to your stomach. Those words were what you had been dreading, and all focus you had managed to gather vanished into thin air. You knew you had been neglecting Peter's affections. Even if every fiber in your being wanted to make him the single most important thing in your life.
It had been almost a week since you'd seen him, and honestly, it was painful in the most innocent way.
But Peter didn't have to worry like you did. He was gifted and already had his entire life ahead of him, set in the middle of Stark industries. But you never asked for a handout, you never asked for help. Even though you knew he was the smartest young man around. You were proud to be his, and the thought of that disappearing was more detrimental to you that failing your upcoming exam.
Y/N: ok, front door is open
Tears were rolling down your cheeks at this point. You had been with Peter for over a year and had gone without seeing him for longer, but he was right. This time was different. This was the third date you had canceled without wanting to, but sometimes apologizing wasn't enough. Peter deserved a lengthy explanation of what you were really going through.
You were so used to holding back your emotions, that times like this were an occasional reoccurrence. You had always been so afraid of unloading your burdens onto others that you still sometimes forgot that having a boyfriend came with that perk. He was still going to love and cherish you if you asked for help and advice. Hell, you needed to realize that he wanted to.
That was a factor of why you were so in love with Peter. He always listened, and sometimes, even push the truth out of you when he could tell you needed it.
"You're already crying, huh." A sad smile was on Peter's face as he opened the door. His sudden appearance startled you, and you managed to chuckle despite the circumstances.
"You know me." You sniffled, immediately embarrassed by the state he had caught you in. Instinctively, you brushed your hair to the side and dabbed the tears from under your eyes. You could feel the remnants of Make-up drying to your skin.
"I didn't mean to ruin your study-"
"But we need to talk." You finished, shoving your school supplies to the edge of the bed. You made enough room, so he was able to sit comfortably.
Slightly embarrassed, you kept your gaze averted as best as you could. Just Peter's presence made your heart flutter, and a part of you was trying to prepare for the worst. You might really lose him this time. And for what? Yes, school was incredibly important, so, so important. But so was Peter, and you needed to find a balance.
Your silence was enough to beckon Peter's thoughts into the open.
"I just need to make sure you're still serious… about us." His voice was soft as if it was struggling to stay neutral.
Finally, gaining the courage to look at him, you locked eyes. Peter's gaze was heavy and forthcoming, and it took all of your willpower to swallow the knot in your throat.
"Of course, I am." The conviction was entirely evident in your tone. So much so, that Peter fell silent. His accusations seemed to die in his throat, but he knew that if he didn't get them out now, they would creep back to him later.
"It's hard to tell sometimes," Peter muttered, unable to gaze at your confused expression. You looked so hurt.
Your silence beckoned him to continue.
"I haven't properly talked with you in a week. You've canceled our last three dates… it seems like you never want to hang out with me anymore."
Peter winced. He was a grown man, and he sounded like a child. Yet, he had let so many things slide, hoping you would come around, hoping you would make it up to him. Perhaps he had been selfish to only think of himself in the relationship. He failed to realize that maybe in attempts to please him, you were putting your own future on the line. 
"I know you're going through a lot, but you can't even seem to talk about it." Peter's shoulders felt tense, his eyebrows knitting together in an agitated expression. His leg was bouncing up and down uncontrollably. He looked like he was about to burst.
"I'm sorry." You said, trying to swallow the knot in your throat. Pausing, you tried to gather your thoughts into cohesive sentences that would soothe his anxious mind.
"There's nobody else, right?" He suddenly blurted, actually turning his head to look at you. Insecurity was glazed in his eyes for the first time.
"Why would you even think that?" You said, startled. The question felt as if he had shoved your head underwater and held it there just long enough for you to choke on the liquid.
His expression was blank for the first time. Vulnerability at its finest. "My life isn't perfect, you know. I overthink just like you. I need reassurance."
Peter was so calm, so calm that it worried you. Though you were already afraid of how this conversation would go, it hurt you to realize that this conversation was the result of your actions. You failed to make Peter feel special like you had promised. Like he had promised you. Relationships go both ways, and for the last couple of weeks, it had only gone one.
"No, Peter. There will never be anyone else."
He sighed, relaxing slightly. "You've been acting weird. I don't really know what to think."
"I told you a billion times, I'm studying. After work, that's literally all I do. And I need to focus."
"I feel like there's more. It feels weird to not see a text from you when I wake up. It feels weird to not hear your voice. I don't… I don't like it, Y/N. Even if that's selfish."
And selfish it was. Peter expected you to be transparent while he was hiding possibly the biggest secret in the world. Maybe that was why he was so worried about how much you loved him. Peter wanted to be honest with you. He wanted you to know he was spider-man, but right now, he still couldn't bring himself to. Perhaps he was looking for a reason.
"I'm sorry." Your hands were clenched in your lap. "I've never had to deal with this before. Everything is so new, even if we've been together for a year. I've never cared about anyone like this, and I can't manage my time."
Peter paused as if every word in this conversation pained him to no end. His eyes were glossy, his mind unclear. He was desperately trying to understand why you were isolating himself. "You can't make any time for me?"
"That's the thing, I can't focus on anything else when I'm with you." Your lip quivered. "And that's a problem."
"It's not for me." He said quickly. "I make time for you, and you don't for me. And you need to tell me why."
You glanced away, embarrassed. No matter what you said, the reason wouldn't be good enough. You were just a bad girlfriend.
Peter reached his hand out and pulled you to him. You rested your chin upon his shoulder, soothed to feel his warmth once again. "You need to tell me, Y/N. We've made it work for this long, and all of a sudden, it stopped."
Your body started to shake. Trying to muffle your sob, you brought your hand to your mouth. It was all too much.
"-You have your whole life together, Peter. I have nothing, I still have to work for it. I'm not as smart as you, I'm-"and that's when the tears started to flow. It was a literal flood, tear after tear poured over your eyelids until they were bloodshot, until pressure pounded through your head.
Before you could finish, your face was pressed against Peter's chest. He held you tightly, his sweatshirt dabbing up your tears of sorrow. You gripped tightly to him, releasing the stress that had been building up inside of you for the last two weeks.
He did not know what else to do. Showing you that he loved you seemed like the most viable option. Sometimes all you had to do was listen, and that was enough.
"I got a bad grade on my midterm exam, one that I didn't study for because I spent my time with you—I thought-"
"Shh." He stroked your hair, understanding what you meant without a complete explanation.
"I work so hard, and it's never enough-"
"It's always enough, Y/N."
"I got so caught up in it that I neglected you in the process. So much so that you thought I was cheating on you" you inhaled sharply, whimpering against him, so many different emotions swirling through your mind. "You're the best thing in my life, and I put you second…"
"Look at me, Y/N." He cupped your cheeks in a swift movement, forcing you to look at him through tear-filled eyes. "You are enough for me. That's why I bothered to have this conversation with you. That's why I care." He pressed his lips against your forehead. "I love you."
"I love you too, Peter." You tilted your head up to kiss him wholly on the lips. You were a mess, but Peter had always told you that you looked beautiful when you cried.
"Rosy cheeks." He whispered, patting down your hair, inhaling your scent, and appreciating the beauty you constantly radiated.
You chuckled, sniffling loudly. Peter always said that after you had a successful mental break down, your cheeks brandished a rosy shade.
"Shut up." You whispered, tightening your grip around his torso. His back fell against your bed, and you shifted to lay completely on top of him. The firmness of his chest underneath you caused instant relaxation, instant relief. Maybe, just maybe, being in his presence was enough to get rid of the stress from everyday life.
The corners of your eyes were raw and red, yet it complimented your shade. Peter vowed from the moment he had met you, that he would never let any harm come to you. The last thing Peter had ever expected was that he might be the reason, instead of the world.
At least, for now, he had the power to fix it. You were the love of his life, and he had never felt so gratified to be in anyone else's presence.
Peter's fingers traced light, small circles on your back. He could hear your heartbeat slow. The softness of your finger against his was enough to help him close his eyes.
He was at peace, real peace for the first time in weeks.
"We need to remind ourselves to talk about shit more." You mumbled sleepy, almost inaudible. "So this doesn't happen again, because I hate it."
"Me too, babe." He whispered, content with watching you rise and fall in sync with his breathing.
"I couldn't bear to lose you."
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mysmedrabbles · 5 years
Text
RFA Comforting an MC with Terrible Period Pains
requested: by anonymous 
a/n: oh my god the header is a MOOD for this ask. enJOY and hAVE FUN READING THIS therES SO MUCHCOFFEEINMYSYSTEMHHHHH want to support my period-ic writing ayy see what i did there? then feel free to buy me a coffee!
warnings: aside from that terrible pun you just witnessed? n/a
-AAAAAAAARRRGHHHHHH mod alex
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Jumin
-he finds you clutching your stomach, sweat beading your forehead as you move from uncomfortable position to uncomfortable position, mastering positions he’d figured only Elizabeth the III could do
-worry creases his forehead as he rushes to your side, touching your side gingerly, almost scared that you’ll crumble under his fingers, but all you do is let out a pained groan, unable to speak as the pounding in your head grows louder with each stab through your gut
- “mC aRe YoU dYiNg???” 
-through pained gesturing, he finally understands that you’re not dying, just going through a torture worse than death
-has no idea what to do, just lays down with you, holding your hand and rubbing soothing circles on your back
-as soon as you finally fall asleep, he’s calling the doctor, wanting a professionals opinion on how best to lessen your pain
-poor doctor in his mind is probably like, “you,,,could have looked this up,,, on your phone,, that you used,,, to call me,,,,,,,, at 1 IN THE MORNING”
-he feels awkward, not being able to help you with more than a hot bottle on your stomach and keeping you company, running his hands through your hair and massaging your temples as he sits with you, helping you the only way he knows how, by rambling about the stock market
-at some point you tune out what he’s saying, focusing on his voice and the comforting patterns hes tracing on your skin
-you can bet that he buys you the most expensive german chocolate, anything that you want, anything you crave will be imported right away and be on your front doorstep the next morning
-he most likely has a calendar app on his phone where he keeps approximate track of your cycle so that he’s always prepared to give you extra special attention and care
-when he goes on business trips that last longer than a week, he has a box specifically made, kind of like a care package containing but not limited to:
-the finest chocolate (10 different kinds! with a surplus of your favourite!)
-those emergency hospital crack-and-place heat packets, good to keep on your lower back and uterus 
-oranges and broccoli (though these tend to be in the fridge)
-with a small note on how much he loves you and will see you tonight on call, telling you to take care of yourself and leaving the doctors phone number in case of an emergency 
Jaehee
-she KNOWS the pain,, she K N O W S 
-im not saying that at some point your cycles start happening at the same time, but thats exactly what I’m saying (i have no idea how this happens irl but it does and?? idk its odd)
-so generally the two of you are sitting home together, laying sprawled on the couch, 4 Ibuprofen between the two of you as you watch Zen’s old musicals, watching Jaehee sleepily hum along as she holds you against her chest, stroking your hair and bringing up your hand to her mouth, kissing your knuckles as the two of you fall asleep together 
-she knows you have a harder time than her when your period rolls around, so she has a tendency to insist that you don’t stress yourself out at work, keeping you mostly behind the counter where you’re not carrying hot liquids for too long. 
-helping you out whenever she can, hugging you from behind as you struggle to stand on your feet, giving you momentary support as she takes the cup from your hands, instructing you to sit down
-no one has ever seen her so lenient with someone when it comes to work
-you log onto the server to gush about Jaehee, posting pictures of her running around at work, helping customers, “ThAtS mY wIFe Y’aLL”
-she has a special coffee brew that she only breaks out when you’re in severe pain, added her secret ingredient (which she refuses to tell you about) that somehow make everything better 
-practically begging her to judo kick you in the spine because goddamnit it hurts so bad (she doesn't, opting for a soothing massage instead)
-kisses and cuddles galore, she puts the care in “caring for you,” to the point where she doesn't complain about her own mediocre periods upon seeing just how bad the pain is with you (please take care of her anyways she deserves the best)
Yoosung
-listen,, this boy grew up with sisters and a mother, he’s practically a pro when it comes to helping you out
-the second he sees you rush into the restroom in a panic, he’s already getting the pill bottle and hot bottle out, doing the bed the way you like it and pulling out your favourite blanket and warm stuffed animal 
-insists to take care of you the whole time, and is willing to skip school to stay home with you,, its only after threatening him from the bed, wagging your finger weakly at him does he actually go, however he’s one to send you worrying text messages through the whole day, and silly photos of a leaf he saw or a funny cat meme
-he cooks for you like theres no tomorrow, and is always extremely apologetic when he gets home an hour later than normal due to grocery shopping, only to find you having finally fallen asleep, stuffed animal discarded neatly on the bedside table, hugging his pillow instead
-his eyes soften, heartrate slowing down as he gazes on your sleeping form
-trying his best not to disturb you, he tiptoes out of the room, getting your favourite dinner ready, and trying his best to make something with your preferred chocolate
-you hobble out of the room sleepily, the smell of food drawing you to the kitchen
-he’ll immediately drop everything, running to you as he helps you to a chair, chiding you for getting up and straining yourself when you could have just called for him
-playing video games together lazily, him joking that he should let you win, but this just drives you to beat his ass in mariokart, absolutely demolishing him with no mercy
-he sits there shell shocked as you sit next to him grinning 
Seven 
-he’s versed in over five languages, survived the worst years of his life, is number one in the Shooting Star Server, the best hacker on the planet, and yet he has no preparation on how to help you through periods
-he knows the basics, but seeing you in such pain makes him rethink everything he thought he knew
-he sees you constantly shifting, arching your back in a vain attempt to crack it, crack any bone for momentary relief, and decides this is his time to shine and help you somewhat
-he gives the best back massages, working the pressure points on your lower back, and getting out all the knots in your shoulders, pressing kisses to your shoulder blades as he goes along, fingers working on the entirety of your back.
-shares his Honey Buddha Chips with you, even letting you take three or more bags, as long as you promise to not waste any that is.
-keeps you away from spicy foods, dairy and phD pepper, his technical knowledge had gotten him that far at least, and even though you’re more than happy to eat junk food for a week straight, for the first time ever he insists on eating better, giving you foods such as salmon and oranges,, only after heavy persuasion and multiple times of you threatening him does he let you have chocolate 
-he stays with you the whole time, making sure you’re laughing and taking care of yourself, trying his best to ease the pain with terrible terrible jokes and horrible Saeran impressions
-he knows that you dont like having a heating pad on your stomach because its so weird barely being able to move and having to stay in one place, so he places his laptop on your stomach, letting it overheat on your pelvic area as the two of you play fireboy and watergirl
Zen
-before we start i just wanna say Zen is 100% the type of guy who would hold no disgust or immature “ew thats icky”type attitude to the thought of buying his s/o menstrual products and he looks down on any man that does have that attitude
-he’s not quite versed in how to help you, but he’s a fast learner, and would rather rely on your own reactions to his help and seeing what works for you as opposed to just asking the void that is the internet what is supposed to help
-he’s one to carry you everywhere while you’re on your period, not letting you strain yourself for fear you’ll get off balance, fall and hurt yourself, and he’s constantly referencing you as his prince(ss), even more than usual
-singing you to sleep, letting his melodious voice wash over you as he holds you close, letting his natural body warmth keep you warm
-strokes your hair as you lay down, exhausted from all the pain, your body physically not able to stay awake anymore, practically blacking out
-if you cry, he’ll hold you, massaging your back and whispering soft comforts in your ear, but inside he’s pained by the distress this is causing you, and is mainly frustrated that he can’t do more
-sometimes he wakes up early in the morning to go for a jog or get breakfast for the two of you, and he’ll leave multiple sticky notes with sweet messages, ensuring that he’ll be back soon and to take it easy until he’s back home
-this man with Refuse to let you strain yourself in Any way, and will drop Everything to run over if he sees you so much as bending over to pick up something, practically throwing himself over the dropped item and insisting to pick it up for you
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justmesadgirl · 5 years
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mistakes - part four
Paring: Ben as Roger Taylor x Reader
Warnings: angst, fluff?
Words: 2.3k
a/n: sorry that it took so long once again I will try to get back to posting couple times a month! 
and if anyone could help me by check my writing let me know!
requests are open!
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“y/n.” The way he said your name made your heart skip a beat. He still looked as good as a couple months ago but a worn out version of the Roger you use to know. Not sure what to do so you just stay there, not moving, just looking at your ex boyfriend who cheated on you. For a second,you just wanted to wrap your arms around his body and just cry. Cry until you had no tears left to cry but you couldn’t. It was over now and there wasn’t Roger and y/n anymore it was just y/n and just Roger. Not a happy ever after. Just two broken hearts and a baby on the way. At that thought, you quickly look down at what you are wearing. Oneof Brian's shirts that came down to your knees. Hoping to god that Roger wouldn’t see the baby bump that's growing fast. “W-what are you doing here?” Roger speaks up again. He had no clue probably why you were here. You were almost sure someone would have told him by now that you lived with Brian but to your surprise, no one had told him. “I-I’m j-just staying here for... umm... a couple of days.” You sounded so unsure with your words not sure how you should react to him. You just wanted to slam the door and go back to bed but it was too late now. “S-so you are with Brian now?” That’s when you realize he had been drinking. He wasn’t drunk but he wasn’t sober either. “Umm.. no?” Your answer was more like a question than a reply. You weren’t with Brian and you could never be with him. He was like a big brother to you, nothing more. “So you just randomly stay at his house -“ he glances down- “Only wearing his shirt?” Now he sounded more mad than before. Like he had the right to be here judging your life choices. As if  he wasn’t  the one that ruined your life in the first place. If he hadn’t been so horny all the damn time, maybe you would be at home. Cuddling up on the couch watching something stupid on the television. Instead you were here in this goddamn awful situation. “Yes.” Is all you say to him. The cold night wind blowing inside making yourself wrap your hands around you body. When you look up at him standing there on the other side of the door his eyes are on your stomach that shows now that your hands are pulling the shirt up a little and you quickly unwrap your hands. “Brians not here so...” you mumble to him trying to get away from the moment but at that moment you see Brian's car pull up. “Well here he is.” Roger drunkenly mumbles out to you. Not sure what you should do so you just stand there until you see Brian get out of the car and his eyes fall on you two. If you were Brian you would just sit back in the car and drive off but luckily Brian wasn’t so selfish. “Hey there friend!” Roger calls out to him and as Brian gets closer you can see that Rogers body tenses. Like he was about to explode because he was so mad. “Roger?” Brian questions as he finally makes it up to you two. Giving you a worried look as you just give him a tight lipped smile. “Well well the man who fucks my girlfriend arrives,” You are as shocked as Brian with the words Rogers spits out of his mouth. “E-excuse me?” Brian chokes out at his friend, clearly trying to make sure if he heard right. “You really think I’m that stupid! I always knew you had a thing for her and now you just... just take her away from me like this!” Roger was full on yelling at this point. So mad that tears were running down his cheeks. You reached to wipe them away but stopped yourself before you could reach his face. You just wanted to tell him everything would be alright and that you still loved him but you would never do that to yourself. “What the hell are you talking about.” You speak out as you see Brian struggling with his own words, Brian who always knew what to say. “He fucking loves you a-and now he has you!” He didn’t make any sense. He was talking with his hands and looked so sad and mad at the same time. “No he doesn’t.” You tell Roger with a small sarcastic laugh as you look at the silent Brian. “A-and now you are pregnant with h-his baby-” he choked- “when I was supposed to be the one you spend the rest of your life with and had kids with!” He yells out as he suddenly just hits Brian straight into his face. You let out a loud yelp as Brian stumbles on to the ground and places his hand on his bleeding nose. You get down on your knees trying to help him. “I-I... I’m sorry Brian.” Roger chokes out when he realized what he had done to his best friend. “You need to leave, mate” Brian tells him as he spits out blood. “Let's get you inside.” You whisper to Brian as you help him up and inside. “Roger you really need to leave. Now.”  you tell him as you turn back to the sad looking man. You close the door to his face as you follow Brian to the bathroom. “Sit down. I will get the first aid kit.” You tell him as you take out the kit. You turn to face your best friend as he was sitting on the edge of the bathtub, holding his bleeding nose. “I’m sorry.” You hear him whisper out to you. “Brian you don’t have anything to be sorry about. I’m the one who should apologize to you.” You tell him as you set yourself between his legs and wrap your fingers under his chin to make him look up at you as you start to clean his cut. “I’m sorry for that. Sorry for leaving you alone to face him. I should have been home.” He whispers to you, Brian tries to look down again but you place your hands on his cheeks and make him look at you. “Please don't be sorry about that. I should not have opened the door to him. It’s my own fault.” You tell him. “It was just so... um... so different to see him after all these months..” you tell him as you let go of him. “Y/n” brian whispers out your name as you are about to leave. He takes your hand in his and pulls you back to where you were standing before. He softly places his palm on your cheek and leans in. Kissing you lips so softly and sweetly. You missed touching someone like this but you couldn’t kiss him back. He was your best friend and you were still in love with your cheating ex boyfriend. “B-brian I can't do this... I’m sorry.” You tell him as you pull away from his gentle touch. You give him a sad smile before your rush out of the bathroom. You could hear Brian call your name after you but you couldn’t stop and talk about what had just happened. Maybe Roger was right and Brian was in love with you. But you could never love him more than a brother or could you? He always had been your best friend and you had always thought about him as your brother never had you had the thought in your mind that you two could be more than what you are now. The kiss made you realize that you are still utterly in love with Roger. After everything he had done you still loved him. You still had hope that maybe one beautiful day you could be happy together again and have your family but you were insane to think like that. You and Roger were over. You walk to your room aka to Brian's guest room that you stayed at. Locking the door after yourself you make your way to your bathroom. Washing your face with cold water before looking at yourself in the mirror. Letting your hands find your growing stomach. “Everything will work out in the end right?” You mumble to yourself. Everything was so confusing right now. Brian kissed you. Roger found out you are pregnant but he thinks it Brian’s when it’s actually his. Taking a deep breath in before you walk back to bed and lay down. It takes a while before you finally fall back to sleep. When you wake up the sun is shining. Letting out a groan as you turn to face the clock. It was almost 12 am, luckily you didn’t have work today. Slowly getting up from the bed heading to the shower. After a long hot shower you start getting ready for the day. You didn’t have plans but you couldn’t stay inside after everything that had happened last night. You check yourself in the mirror before walking out of the room. Quietly walking to the front door. You really didn’t want to have that awkward conversation with Brian right now. You needed time to think about everything and maybe day in town would help. So you make it out of the door before you start fast walking away from the house, scared that Brian heard you shut the front door after you. It was relaxing to spend the day alone. You walked around stores had a nice dinner at your favorite pub by your and Rogers old place. You and Roger would come here almost every Sunday for a Sunday Roast. You missed it, you would spend some time alone in your special place that no one close to you knew about but just you and Roger and you missed you two having dinner while talking about the upcoming week and your plans. Looking at the almost empty plate in front of you as you hear someone sit down next to you. When you look up you are glad to see that it was Larry, the owner of the pub. “y/n! I haven’t seen you in so long! How are you my darling?” You give him a tight lipped smile. He was always so nice to you, making you feel so welcomed. “I'm good thank you. How are you?” You ask him. It was nice to see him after so long. You use to see him almost every weekend and now it had been months. “Im great darling. Where is Roger? I already thought that something happened between you because Roger is always here alone nowadays” He tells you. His words make your heart ache a little. “Oh we aren’t together anymore.” You tell him trying to give your best sweet smile. “Oh...” is all Larry answers you. “I need to get back to work. Hope you enjoy your meal and I hope I will see you soon.” He gives you one last smile before he gets up and gets back to whatever he was doing before sitting down. Slowly finishing your dinner and staying there for a while after. Not ready to go back home yet but at the same time you couldn’t stay there any longer, it probably looked weird that you were having dinner alone in a local pub and didn’t even have a drink. Taking a deep breath before gathering your stuff. Saying goodbye to Larry before walking out of the door to the cold late autumn air. You loved winter but hated it in London.
 You loved snow and cold but just the cold wasn’t your thing. Not wanting to go home yet you just start walking around your old neighborhood. Not even thinking when you finally stop in front of a really familiar house that you use to call home. The lights were on and you knew that meant Roger was home. 
Not sure what came to you but you walk up the driveway and knock on the front door. You hear someone walking on the other side when you realize what you were doing. So you were about to start walking away when someone opened the door. “y/n?” Rogers voice was soft and questioning. Like he wasn’t sure if it was really you. 
Slowly turning around to face him giving him a tight lipped smile and bursting some of your hair behind your ear. “Sorry I don’t know what I was thinking.” You tell him as you start to walk away but you feel his strong hand in yours. “Please stay.” He almost whispers to you like he was afraid you would disappear. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea.” You tell him as you turn to face him again. For the first time you take a good look at him. His hair was longer, he looked sleepless and he had on old jeans and a white shirt. “I don’t know either but just come inside... I’m begging you y/n.” It felt so weird to feel his hand in yours and hear him saying your name. Giving his hand a small squeeze before letting go of it and nodding your head. “Okay.” You say before making your way into the house you use to call home.
Guys tell me if y/n should end up with Roger or Brian!
tag lists are open!
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datleggy · 4 years
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I’m autistic and one of the things I have trouble with is change. I’ve watched 911 since the third episode and now they have a second one? Idk. I’ve been seeing a lot of good things about it but I’m not sure if I want to watch it. Basically what I want to know is if it’s worth watching. Is it good? Are there any parallels between the new one and the Buck one? Who are the characters and what are they like? Will you start writing for this series instead of the other one? %
so, this got WAY longer than i thought it would, sorry!!! TL;DR is at the very very end!
tbh i didn’t wanna really give 911 lonestar a chance originally, i was lowkey annoyed bc it felt like they were like “oh u guys want buck and eddie, who are CLEARLY meant to be and have all this canon chemistry and relationship development to eventually get together??? lol NOPE but here’s a spinoff where u get ur white/latino gay ship :D”
which i do genuinely hope to god isn’t the case, like, i really need OG 911 to be like PSYCH here u go, some DIAZ-BUCKLEY fam. as a treat.
i did end up watching it bc curiosity and too many awesome gifsets finally got to me lol
and im only a couple of episodes in (haven’t had a chance to watch the 3rd ep bc of work and other things D: ) and so far i gotta say, i like the OG 911 calls that they get sent to more than 911 lonestars calls but again, im only 2 ep in, maybe they get more “woah thats crazy/hilarious/hearbreaking!” as the show goes on.
i honestly don’t see too many parallels between Buck and TK—the only thing i noticed where they’re pretty similar is how much they both enjoy easy physical contact. buck is very touchy feely and comfortable about showing affection/feelings and i feel like TK is the same regarding physical contact (with his dad at least)? but that’s about it.
for what it’s worth i do think the show is pretty entertaining and worth a watch!
my main reason for watching past the first episode is my enjoyment of the characters. i just think they’re all neat.
this is from a post i made when i first watched the show lol:
captain strand: good dad to all of his children
tk: hot gay messy boi
grace ryder: a fave, no nonsense beauty, judds better half
judd ryder: tragic big boi
captain blake: chaotic good w baby voice
marjan: wild feral messy gurl
mateo: if anybody’s mean to my SON im throwin hands bih
paul: again, if anybody’s mean to my SON im THROWIN hands
officer reyes: ready to dick tk down
here’s a more descriptive/longer summary of the characters if u wanna know more, if not skip down to the bolded sentence below lol:
owen strand is the captain (played by rob lowe) and to me he gives off chris traeger vibes (from parks and rec if u watched?) but with more depth. i like his character a lot, he’s a caring dad, seems like he knows what he’s doing, and like, c’mon, it’s rob lowe (i fell in love with him a million years ago when he played soda pop in the outsiders nipr;guebwuogrnofw)
tk is his son and a hot gay mess w some substance abuse issues (tho a lot has happened to him in only 2 ep i really don’t know how to feel about him entirely, bc besides stuff happening TO him, i don’t feel like he’s reacted in a way that shows much of his character?) idk maybe it’s just me. but he is a certified cutie so. lol
grace ryder, she’s smart (one of the only characters with more than ONE brain cell lmao) and gorgeous and an emergency 911 operator. she’s very supportive of her husband and what he’s going thru (which is A LOT), she herself has been thru a lot bc of the big incident at the beginning of the series and is still somehow held strong in spite of it all, she’s a personal fave of mine.
judd ryder is kind of a dick at first but i think its very understandable given the hell he’s been thru, im actually surprised at the amount that i like him. he’s very raw and vulnerable but has this “don’t worry im fine, back up” attitude that i loooove. 
captain blake is the captain for EMTs, she’s got this soft teeny baby voice that contradicts so hard with her give no fucks ima do what i need to to find my missing sister actions irwughqwgoriegjf i like. she’s caring and does goes out of  her way for the little guy.
marjan has ZERO chill but in a good way, i can already absolutely see her getting into trouble by doing some crazy impulsive thing on a call in order to rescue someone—-TBH she actually reminds me a lot of Buck from OG 911 in that way. like yea she’s reckless and impulsive but u can tell its bc she CARES and this firefighting thing is what she’s meant to do. i really like her.
mateo—-OH MAN. he’s 10000000% my favorite. it hurts me everytime he’s on screen, bc he’s such a sweet and HARD WORKING man and he deserves to be a firefighter and do what he wants/has been waiting for for so long, im so HAPPY captain strand gives him a chance. i think he might have some learning disability or maybe he grew up in a household where maybe his family was too busy or didn’t care to check up on how he was doing in school and they neglected to see how much he was struggling—this is all just pure speculation from the fact that on the show he tells captain strand during the interview that he’s always passed the physical exam to be a firefighter but keeps failing the written part :( i love my son.
paul is a trans firefighter who’s mainly known for his crazy good observational skills in the field—there’s an ep—ep 2?—that shows off his talent but like, i found it unintentional funny bc the way they did it was in a scene that honestly truly felt to me like a scene I MYSELF would write in a fanfiction if i wanted to show off a cool skill the character has but was also too lazy to make it look good???? lmaoooo im not trying to be mean but like, if u do watch it, its the 2nd ep i believe, the “office meeting” scene. other than that tho there’s only been a few scenes with paul in it (my personal fave being the skin care routine scene lol) but i look forward to more scenes of my son being a lil sherlock holmes :)
officer reyes is tk’s potential new mans. he seems like a good cop from what little ive seen of him doing police work. so, i saw a post someone made basically saying how ugly are the men in texas that officer reyes is out here thirsting over tk so HARD—and not to be rude, but he really is!!!! reyes is a goodlookin guy, so idk what’s up with that, maybe he likes messy bois? bc same.
p.s. im not sure how to feel about reyes and tk together yet bc it doesn’t really seem as if they have too much chemistry. hopefully that changes? i do kinda like that they haven’t started off their potential relationship on the best of foots, bc i love drama, an indisputable fact.
ONTO THE FINAL QUESTION!
OG 911 will always be my first love and i just don’t see this changing anytime soon. buddie will always be the #1 ship in my heart! and i have about a gazillion awesome prompts i need to work on so me switching over to 911 lonestar isn’t gonna happen. i love OG 911 way too much iuqhur4ogfoie3jwnwjinioj
tho i may occasionally—per the request of prompts i’ve gotten in the last week or so–take a couple of the characters from 911 lonestar and put them in a 911 fic as a crossover? we’ll see.
this ended up soooo long oruhibgruoeqwp i hope some of it helped tho?
tl;dt: 911 lonestar seems fun and the characters are interesting enough to keep me entertained so i say give it a chance  :)
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sofialuu · 5 years
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( chou tzuyu, cis female, she/her ) it’s everyone’s fav, SOFIA LU! they are TWENTY and major in COMPUTER SCIENCE, and the group knows they’re AVID and EFFULGENT, but also OBSTINATE and RESERVED. they’ve got a big personality for the mix, so watch out in the close quarters this summer!
hello there!! my name is evie im 9teen and live in the gmt timezone,, i luv kpop ggs and dylan o'brien lots and im SOoOOoO excited for this roleplay and getting to know all of u!! but anyways,, enough about me bc its time to introduce you to the qt pie that is sofia lu!! if you want to plot (or even just have a lil chat bc why not) pls dont hesitate to hit me up w/ a message on either tumblr or discord uwu ♡
✦*.・゚BACKSTORY sofia was born in charlotte, north carolina and grew up with her older brother known as sebastian lu -- whom she has a great relationship with. with her stern taiwanese parents, sofia has always struggled to live up to their standards especially, when her parents constantly compared her to sebastian -- who is currently enrolled in an ivy league college. during her time as a child, sofia was always that timid girl sitting at the back of the classroom but, she grew up and eventually could feel herself escaping her own shell. she relied on video games as a source of comfort and entertainment while growing up and as a result of this, she decided to become a twitch streamer at 16. she frequently plays games like dead by daylight, overwatch, league (tbh whatever it is,, she has probably played it) with college exams and college in general, she hasn't had much time to do her regularly scheduled streams so, she ultimately went on hiatus. her parents don't understand her hobbies and say they are a "waste of time" and that she should be doing better things with her life -- just like sebastian. even though she feels disheartened that they think so she doesn't plan to stop doing what she loves. she was able to find some common ground with her parents by taking up computer science as her major in dumont. she has always had an interest for coding, the internet and computers in general. she has just finished her first year and shes genuinely excited for what the future holds for her. this summer, sofia has decided to branch out by taking up vlogging and jumping head first into new experiences (kinda like a comeback). shes certain that this is a summer she will never forget especially, with everything she hopes to achieve by the end of it. ✦*.・゚PERSONALITY (and some extras!!) effulgent: due to being a streamer, sofia hopes to brighten up the days of those who watch her -- if thats what they need. she radiates positive energy and strikes to make people around her laugh and smile. this personality trait of hers is what makes it so easy for her to make new connections with people!! avid: sofia is willing to do anything thrown at her. she loves trying out new things!! whatever that thING may be -- she will probably volunteer to go first. she loves creating memories for herself by doing these kinda thing yknoo sdfjkhsdff obstinate: sofia can be opinionated when she feels it is necessary. she sticks to her own view like 1009383% of the time and can struggle to relate to those who offer a different point of view. if she is passionate about something, there is literally no way to change her mind. reserved: due to her strict parents and her life as a twitch streamer, sofia is hella secretive of her personal life (dating, esp). she gets questioned a lot online and has to hide many sides of herself for her own safety. as a result of this 4 year-old habit, sofia can come across as someone who is quite private and closed off. it could take a while to really know who she is. she's hella good at being secretive (or atleast she likes to think that) sofia also luvs memes and dogs,, she will probably be watching dog videos like 90% of the time. bc of her obsession she also brought along her 3 y/o pom called laila cuz how could she even leave her baby behind??? fkldg ✦*.・゚GOALS FOR THE ROADTRIP to share this unforgettable experience with the world on her brand new youtube channel; sofialuu to try new things and find out more about who she is!! due to being bicurious, sofia wants to finally figure her sexuality and maybe find a special connection with someone. (she just recently realized tht o shit i might actually like girls um) actually have a life instead of playing video games and coding for uni projects 24/7
this is just what i have to far,, i hope its okay!! ill add more stuff to her final bio bc ill probably understand her more when it gets to actually roleplayingkldfgk
✦*.・゚CONNECTIONS (this is just what i have so far,, im happy to brainstorm tho!! ill probably have a full connections page ill post in the discord soon for some more ideas n stuff) ex toxic relationship: i thought it would be a good idea for sofia to mayb have an ex bf that she kept secret from every1(especially her parents). the two of them could of been equally bad for eachother,, perhaps it was when she was a senior and not in college yet,, then maybe she hasnt seen that certain ex around the uni but like sees them again after the break up... on... the... road... trip.. i- friends/enemies: since sofia is p sociable now,, she definitely needs friends!! they can be childhood friends or her roommates, tbh whatever u want!! i also think some enemies would be good and v interesting!! tbh literally anything: 4 rl just hmu
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lookwhatilost · 5 years
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i finished my second watch of bojack s6 p1 and here’s a predictably massive post of some thoughts/observations abt it
spoilers under the cut obviously
the “fuck” of the season definitely came in a moment that i didn’t expect, but i rly liked how it was used. like, it was a callback to when gina dropped it in the last season –– something that traumatized her vs a reaction to her PTSD symptoms. a lot of people seem unhappy w it but i think it’s more powerful than people are giving it credit for being
the gatsby reference in e3 rly brought to mind that there are, like, a lot of gatsby tie-ins w this show and i never rly pasted them together mentally bc of the ubiquity of the “rich guy is utterly depressed and alone” trope. like, the imagery related to the pool, the shallow parties, the yellow car, the spacious but empty house, the billboards staring him down as he drives when he’s hallucinating in s5. charlotte/daisy being a weak parallel in that he had feelings for her when they were younger, held onto them for years, only for her to be married when they reconnect, but it’s worth mentioning that the glow stick balloons were green.
someone on reddit pointed out that jameson’s baby in e1 had physical traits associated w fetal alcohol syndrome. like, short, upturned nose, eyes that are far apart, and low ears. it’s hard to say if it’s intentional, but he’s drawn w a lot more detail than a lot of the other babies i’ve seen in the show. if it’s purposeful, like, that’s amazing attention to detail
i liked how the season opened on a planetarium flashback, because honestly, the immediate aftermath of sarah lynn’s death is definitely kind of glossed over in s3 when it initially happens. and though i suppose the added information isn’t terribly surprising (like him lying abt the events that lead up to her overdose and minimizing his own role in it as much as possible), it did make me wonder why i hadn’t thought abt it before
bojack rly does show signs of serious growth in the 6th season and it’s cool to finally see him move forward w/o simultaneously backsliding in other ways. a lot of his good actions in previous seasons were only rly things that benefitted him. and there are a lot of examples of it, but i think the one that stuck out to me the most was w his therapist. when he fell off the wagon, it’d have been rly easy for bojack to look the other direction and walk away like we’ve seen him do before. realistically, he has no real incentive to care for doctor champ’s wellbeing if he’s no longer staying at pastiches, but he checks him into rehab anyway, and when doctor champ throws his insecurities in his face to be hurtful, he immediately identifies it for the petty jab it is instead of letting it fuel his negative thoughts and using it as an excuse to dive into self-destructive behavior. honestly e6 was the emotional high water mark of part 1, even though it wasn’t the kind of gut punch that the dramatic, narrative focused episodes of bojack tend to be
i’m glad that the writers finally /did/ something w todd that made him feel like an actual character instead of jst a device for the comedy part of the show. i used to watch this show w a friend and we always used to say that todd had very little depth given the amount of screen time he occupies and seeing them move away from that was refreshing. his struggle w jorge is very relatable as someone whose parents have always pushed me towards things i didn’t sincerely want based on their expectations and desires for me vs my actual opinions of what success and happiness would look like for myself. but, on the other side of the coin, there’s finally a little bit of confrontation of the fact that todd’s erratic behavior and shenanigans are very taxing things for people who care abt him to deal w. and todd is rly the only character who’s somehow defied the show’s formula in that he never faces accountability for the things he does. like, he’s enabled PB’s impulsivity many times and drove him to bankruptcy, care of PB Livin’, and it’s a detail in the show that’s never truly been acknowledged or talked abt at all. he fucked PC over when he wouldn’t follow through w his sham marriage to courtney, and it was met w a cheesy speech from her abt how he needs to follow his heart and do what he thinks is right. it always struck me as a weird oversight, and to finally see someone take him to task for how taxing his behavior can be was refreshing. his only other “depth” was the asexual stuff and honestly? that is stupid and does not actually count for anything
if it didnt warm your heart when PC named her daughter ruthie then you dnt have one. i wasn’t as invested in her narrative as i’d have liked to be, but its good when PC is happy and that’s what everyone wants
IM SO GLAD JUDAH IS BACK. also i still hope he and PC end up together (and maybe she has a viable pregnancy this time w him a la sex and the city charlotte but that’s a little too cornball sappy for this show). generally rly enjoyed how characters from previous seasons were incorporated this time around. but i dnt want them to bring back vincent adultman jst to spite everyone who’s always saying “bring back vincent adultman”
pickles is still my least favorite character even tho the surprise wedding episode was probably the one i found the funniest. realistically i wanna see things work out for PB but his relationship w her is obviously not the move for him, and she’s also the worst
i like diane and guy together, they have rly good chemistry but i also have a bad feeling abt where things are headed w them. he seems ambivalent abt how principled she is and the scene where his son comes to the party and he makes her leave when he could have jst introduced her as a party guest if it even needed to happen at all... there was jst something off abt it. like you can definitely see the cracks in the foundation already and it’s disappointing
the scene btwn PB and bojack where bojack says to him “but i understand that feeling of needing to bottle up your guilt, not burden other people w it. you think you’re protecting them from your toxicity, you convince yourself that you’re being selfless, but it comes out in other ways and it infects everything” hit close to home bc it reminded me of someone i used to bond over this show w and like... whew
i rly love how the dominoes are being set up w the reporters (even tho their his girl friday shtick got old fast) bc the way things are culminating, the story getting out is liable to expose bojack for everything. if they approach penny and she talks to them abt what happened, she’s liable to tell them that bojack and sarah lynn went to ohio to find her in the time before sarah lynn overdosed, and the pictures that her classmates took of them could establish a time frame. he was in new mexico when he was supposed to be filming secretariat, and that knowledge could lead to them finding out that he’d been digitally replaced in the movie. when this information gets out, it’s very likely that gina will dogpile onto it w the truth abt what happened on the set of philbert, since trying to conceal her ptsd is actively hurting her acting career bc of the reputation she’s developing as a problem actress, and even though she dznt *want* to be “that girl that got choked by bojack horseman”, she won’t have a choice if she can’t get jobs otherwise. i guess there’s always a chance that penny and charlotte won’t talk to them, but now that hollyhock knows about what happened in new mexico, either way his personal life will be hurt by this. i’m not sure what’ll happen to him professionally, since there’s a recurring point the series has been making w famous people never being held fully culpable for their negative actions, and it’s a dicey thing for them to approach w a character that many viewers find sympathetic without ending on some myopic note abt cancel culture (whether intentionally or by popular interpretation) but im excited
i also hate how my obsessive watching and rewatching of this show meant that the intended pete repeat reveal (like, you’re not supposed to recognize him until his identity becomes obvious through the prom night story) was sort of compromised for me bc i recognized his voice and the second he introduced himself, i placed him IMMEDIATELY but it was still such a great scene. it’s the most tense i remember feeling when watching and an all around great cliffhanger
the final line of e7 comes off as some rly grim foreshadowing–– “it looks like you found solace in our show. stay if you’d like. in 30 minutes, we start over”. but it’s such an incredible line in context. my god, i fucking love this show, you guys
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firebuug · 5 years
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ok here’s this. pokemon au ramble. because this week has just been me loving my ocs but bass boosted. under the cut!! this post will be REALLY long mainly because of the teams sorry!
pokemon au is pure bc no deaths or rlly bad things happen
buggy is a trainer who went on the pokemon journey for fun and as a coming-of-age kinda thing(also because he may or may not have burnt his house down with a litwick), but kinda stopped getting gym badges half way and decided to settle down and just take the road casually. he settled down with apoccy and they both run a little pokemon sanctuary and care for pokemon that aren’t able to go back to the wild or have some little quirk (for example a litwick that cant keep itself lit easily). he likes battling for fun rather than for glory, and when his rival (farrow, obvs) was like “ha im gonna beat u and become the champion and ur not” he was like “i mean ok have fun!” which makes farrow pissed. he’s a guy who really cares about pokemon’s feelings and basically got back into action from pokemon santuary-ing and fought against the coven (the bad guy team) to stop them from hurting anyone.
team: 
- Ari (talonflame) (he flies around on her!)
- Lulu (chandelure) (his absolute baby and child)
- Fluffy (ampharos) (he named it fluffy when it was a mareep but then it evolved a bit and it wasnt fluffy anymore. its name is still fluffy tho)
- Big Boy (pelipper) (he’s a big ocean enthusiast but can’t swim and is a bit afraid of the water, so he uses pelipper to navigate over it and help him fish)
- Ellis (sylveon) (he wanted him to be a flareon but he loved them a lot and he ended up becoming a sylveon but buggy still loves him 100%)
- Musha (musharna) (musha helps him go to sleep easier and stay awake better as well, it’s basically his service pokemon ahghjhdjkf. she’s usually floating by his side!)
i think mendel would be a pokemon professor bc he studies pokemon. how he was even trusted enough to hand out pokemon to small children is a mystery, but gene takes care of most of the friendly stuff with handing u ur pokemon and stuff, mendel just does the research. later on it’s revealed that mendel is part of the region’s bad guy group, the coven! (>:3cc) their goal is to fuse multiple powerful pokemon together into the perfect pokemon that is able to beat everything and everyone else, in a combination of every type in existence. (Idk if this is the plot of any game bc i dont remember the plot of any game past pokemon b/w honestly) eventually the protag gets them to not fucking destroy everything and befriend the big boy pokemon (juggy, but like pokemon) and the coven disbands their group and just live life as normal people not criminals bc pokemon verse is best verse
team: - Juggy (sivally) (idk shit about sivally or the sumo plot but it looks like a fusion pokemon and its cute so like um there we go ig. in the actual au itd probably be a completely new pokemon but im lazy)
- Cofagrigus (obvious reasons. if i didnt want to keep this au pure i wouldve mentioned he still grave digs)
-Mimikyu (shut up its cute)
- Flabebe (flowere) (”oh what a pretty flower, it will be great to work on. oh no its a pokemon. guess its my child now”)
- Arbok (its a snake he loves snakes he gives it little pats on the head and rattatas)
- Claydol (it has a ton of red eyes and its black and red what more do you want from him. also he thinks it is cool and its psychic so like hhuiionnghgh yeah)
gene is a pokemon docdor (he heals those boys up for you and takes care of them) and helps mendel out in research since they both share an interest in researching pokemon!!! he doesn’t know that hes part of the bad guy team that snatches up pokemon and doesn’t question any weird things he decides to research about until like the end. he’s really nice and’ll probably catch up to you along your journey just to see how you’re doing, check up on you, and give you cool stuff like the master ball n stuff. he has a big greenhouse where he grows berries and’ll give you some as gifts along the way. he battles you occasionally to see how strong you’ve gotten and’ll heal your pokemon when your done, giving you tips. he likes hanging out around forests and little garden areas.
team:
- Serperior (long boi. good noodle boi.)
- Comfey (C O M F E Y flowere boi) 
- I lost my old gene team im so sad so i dont remember any of it
- Bitty (budew) (BABY BOY BABY! he loves them sm) (it evolves into roserade later on but shhhshhh baby budew)
- Swanna (pretty birb!!) (helps him water the plants in the greenhouse!!)
- Ana (unfezant) (HE NEEDS ANA OK)
- Audino (mega) (he needs that healy pokemon it’s essential) (theyre his little helper)
farrow is the stereotypical rival guy tbh. with buggy he was like “im gonna be better than u” and buggy was like “stop bullying me” but then just “ok” so he got bored. with skuggy it was more competitive, and they even battled each other right at the victory road’s entrance to see who was better, but they never got to complete the elite 4 trial since the coven juggy shit happened and they basically had to team up temporarily to stop these guys. when all of that was done farrow got back to challenging the elite four and trying to become champion, but he’s still struggling and is trying to train his team to become better while skuggy went “eh i’m done that was fun tho” and gave up. farrow hates being seen as weak and wants to have the strongest team, but he still loves his pokemon even if he pushes them near the limit sometimes while all focused up on winning.
team:
- Ally (linoone) (theres no possum pokemon and im mad but he likes ferrets too so) (or uh. long raccoon?) (either way he loves ally and she’s kind of a tank)
- Mittens (incineroar) (this was his starter, somehow, since he took the traditional trainer coming-of-age path and went to become the best.) (he loves his cat even if it did become....bipedal and buff??????) (They share the same big ego and victory flexing) (he rides on mittens’s shoulders sometimes or mittens carries him with arms in the air like a king)
- Rogue (liepard) (cate!!) (also it really fits him!!!) (he loves his thief cat and steals everyone’s items with it and makes them mad) (skuggy has cursed this cat out for stealing all his pokemon’s items at least twice before while both her and farrow looked on grinning smugly)
- Jasper (noivern) (i associate farrow with bats a lot, i think he likes bats now) (big fuckig boy who farrow flies on and farrow really likes battling with) (when farrow is out travelling and is tired and it’s late but he can’t find anywhere to stay, jasper shields him and makes whats basically a mini tent with his wings around him)
- Doggo (houndoom) (Farrow named him doggo as a joke but it stuck) (Fire dog with evil aesthetic! Farrow loves this) (He’s a good dog and farrow pats him for doing good work. he sniffs out berries and items for him on the road and is like his guard dog.)
- Snippy (gliscor) (another bat babey) (i might change it but idk) (it’s a sneakey boy) (he is also a tank and poisons everyone’s pokemon) (farrow accidentally gets stung by him like twice a week)
skuggy is a trainer who set out on the pokemon journey as a means to get out of his shitty house and family, collecting pokemon to help defend himself, but ended up really loving pokemon (especially bug types) and trying to take on a few gyms while he was at it. eventually he met farrow and it became kind of like a little race to see who can get the most gym badges first, giving him a motivation to travel the region and take on the elite 4. after the juggy fiasco he got a bit tired of fighting and decided he valued his pokemon a lot since they defended him and helped him fight back so he said “yknow what im gonna take a break from our race thing, im just gonna find somewhere to finally stay and chil out” while farrow was shaking the elite four’s door like “LET ME IIIIIN”. he’s kinda chill now and is thinking about going back and trying to fight the 4 someday, but for now he’s just a guy who catches bugs. he and gene hang out sometimes and go into forests n stuff. he’s still a butcher in this world ig. mans gotta make some money
team:
- Clove (scolipede) (his first pokemon, he caught it and went with it, but got really attached really fast) (she is his baby and he made it so far with her by his side and is really proud of both clove and himself for getting this far) 
- Big Tony (armaldo) (he found a fossil pokemon and kept it since it’s rock type and can help ward off fire types, which is a big weakness of his team, but he ended up loving big tony too. i know theyre supposed to be like 4 foot 9 but please imagine big tony as a BIG boy that skuggy can ride on its shoulders and back to get around.)
- Babie (ribombee) (he caught this thing and said “this is the cutest shit i’ve ever seen.” went on to destroy dragon types and be the best bee ever.) (actually it’s pretty weak but skuggy believes in them)
- Toaster (heracross) (heracross was too cute for skuggy NOT to catch. it’s the powerhouse. this boy rips thru pokemon likes it’s nothing. unless it’s a fire or flying type. then it dies.) (it likes to f i t e and shares skuggy’s quick temper, because u know what they say, like pokemon like trainer)
- Big old boy (stoutland) (this was also one of the first pokemon he’s ever caught and it was really strong, defended him well and was kind of like the tank of the team, so he kept it. he likes sleeping on its back, and sometimes it has to remember it isn’t a tiny dog anymore because it tries to jump at skuggy to greet him and he gets fucking smashed.) (hes a very good boy, he’s very fluffy, and skuggy loves him so much and owes him his life)
- Jeff (swadloon) (skuggy loves his emo-looking son.) (ever since he beat depression in the dick he just cant help but see himself in swadloon) (but swadloon is happy, just very comfy and grumpy) (swadloon loves skuggy and skuggy loves swadloon) (i mean just look at him) (it’s perfect for skuggy)
okay i’m done here there’s obviously more people but this post is getting alarmingly long and i still need to make their teams. if u read this entire thing u deserve 20 cat images and more jesus christ u madman !!!!!!
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byunnct · 6 years
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cute cat, cute boyfriend [jeno nct]
pairing: lee jeno x reader
summary: jeno is a big fan of your cat and secretly a big fan of you. college!au
a/n: since i don’t have time to write a full fic but have been in the mood to write i thought i’d have a go at bullet point scenarios :D this was inspired by that viral tweet ‘whenever im sad i text this girl to show me her cat’!! hope it isn’t too bad <3
so you have a cat, a beautiful ragdoll cat, lovingly named cracker
and you have no idea why or how but certain places on your college campus allow residents to have pets
you’re not complaining because it means you were able to bring your lil friend from back home with you to college
and she has the brightest blue eyes that your best friend renjun swears hypnotises people into giving her treats
the top of her head, around her ears and just under her jaw, is an ashy grey with some parts a slightly darker grey
the rest of her is white
she’s the most elegant feline ever and her tail has a sassy sway to it whenever she walks around your dorm
at the beginning of the year someone created an instagram page dedicated to the campus’s pets and it was instantly popular
even endorsed by the college itself because it’s a pure expression of admiration and love for students’ pets and really what’s better than that
so your roommate submitted pictures she took of your cat to go onto the page after you offhandedly mentioned that cracker would be the most popular pet on the page
you were not wrong
cracker instantly captured everyone’s attention and became the most liked picture on the account to the point where the owner of the page messaged ur roommate to ask for more pictures (“i told you! it’s the eyes, i swear! she’s like a witch!” –renjun)
people on campus even started approaching your roommate to ask about the cat and she had to direct them all to you, each person asking you to start your own instagram page for your little popular queen
you said no every time because you’re a struggling college student who spends all her time in college or working to earn money which is then spent on ur damn cat you don’t have time to run an instagram account for her
and she’s already spoiled enough you don’t want to boost cracker’s ego too much
unbeknownst to you, jeno fell completely in love with cracker the second he saw her on the Instagram page (jeno, an avid visitor of the campus pet instagram page) and would always whine to his friends about how cute the cat is
since he’s allergic he can’t own them himself and his roommate, jaemin, uses this excuse every time jeno even BEGINS thinking about owning a pet
every time a new picture of cracker was posted on the campus instagram page he’d get so excited and be the first to comment and like
he’d get teased by his friends too because essentially jeno was a really big fan of cat, an animal, compared to donghyuck who would be freaking out over the new red velvet selfie – they’re in different worlds
BUT jeno can’t get over how enchanting cracker’s large eyes are, how fluffy her tail is, how photogenic a CAT is and he’s completely enamoured by your little feline
so one night there’s a big party to celebrate the end of the first term but you sadly can’t go since you don’t feel too good and don’t want to make yourself worse
it’s also cracker’s birthday and the SECOND you coughed and your throat felt scratchy you knew it was a sign from the gods to stay home and celebrate w your cat
your roommate goes tho, after feeding cracker one too many treats as a birthday gift, and since you offered to pick her up if need be she said she’ll text you later
at midnight you get a text from an unknown number
[00:17am, UNKNOWN]: heyyyyyyyyyyy
you think its your roommate texting from someone else’s phone because hers died so you respond instantly with ‘you good?’
[00:20am, UNKNOWN]: im great havea quesiotn
[00:20am, you]: shoot
[00:21am, UNKNOWN]: sned ur cat
[00:22am, you]: what? Call me
your phone rings a minute later and when you answer
it’s not your roommate
it’s a boy you’ve never heard before and he’s mumbling incoherently and it worries you
not only because you were expecting your roommate but because this guy sounds absolutely GONE and you can picture him swaying from side to side due to intoxication
you ask him his name about ten times before you get an actual answer: jeno
you recognise the name as one of renjun’s friends so you know you can at least trust him to some extent
he keeps saying ‘send your cat’ and you don’t quite know what he means so when you ask him he says
“i love your cat”
that’s it. He keeps repeating ‘send your cat’ and ‘i love your cat’ and no matter what else you say to him, ‘go drink some water!’ ‘where are you?’ ‘do you need me to call someone?’, he keeps going on about cracker and you look at the cat lying next to you, lazily cleaning her paws, and hang up on him
you take the party hat you had taken pictures of her in earlier and put it back on her head, telling her you’re sorry you have to put it back on and promise her treats if she sits still, and bring up the camera app on your phone
then you go back to your messages and send two of the best pictures you took of her to this jeno guy, hoping you’re understanding him correctly and that you can convince him to listen to you after he’s seen the picture
the response you get is a bunch of keyboard smashes
you call him back and he’s.. crying? kind of? he sounds choked up but he’s so drunk you wouldn’t be surprised if he actually was crying from happiness
he’s much more willing to listen to you after seeing cracker and keeps telling you how cute she is and it sounds like he’s trying to stand up from wherever he is from the shuffling on the other end of the call
then there’s more shuffling and another voice, much more sober, comes through the receiver
“im so sorry, whoever you are. jeno’s a mess. im taking him home now, im his roommate, he’s ok. bye.”
and the call ends
you go to sleep, still a little worried for jeno, but your worries are quashed when you wake up because jeno has texted you again
much more sober and embarrassed
[11:57am, UNKNOWN]: im so sorry omg
[11:57am, UNKNOWN]: you must hate me haha
[11:57am, UNKNOWN]: i got too drunk sorry you can block my number if you want
[11:57am, UNKNOWN]: thank u for the cat pictures tho im a big fan
your heart warms at the texts because he seems to feel guilty and it’s endearing, and then you smile when you read the text about your cat
you reply telling him it’s ok, you’re not mad at all and you’re glad he got home safe, but how did he get your number? you’ve never spoken before?
he explains that he has memory of drunk jeno asking renjun for your number, to which he was bluntly rejected and told no, and then asked around the party for who has your number until he stumbled upon someone who gave it to him with a wink
[13:10pm, JENO?]: i think people think i was trying to make a move on you haha
jeno apologises about twelve more times throughout the conversation and you tell him it’s ok every time
and ask if a picture of cracker will make him feel better
…to which he responds yes instantly
and from then on even though you and jeno barely know each other, your only connection renjun and now your cat, a bond formed
jeno would text you at random times with random messages asking for a picture of cracker
and if you were able to you were more than happy to oblige
renjun thought it was really weird that you two became almost..friends… just through occasionally texting and sending pictures of an animal to him
jaemin initially thought jeno finally got a significant other since whenever he’d look at him jeno would be smiling at his phone, texting with quick fingers to respond to whoever he was talking to
renjun broke jaemin’s heart when he told him jeno was happy over a cat
but he pieced it back together when he mentioned the owner of the cat was an attractive female
this goes on for several months before one day you receive a text saying there’s a package available to be picked up for you? and you’re like? Who
so you go pick it up and when you get back to your dorm you cautiously open it to find an array of cat treats and cat toys
there’s even a little post-it note with a cute message for cracker
to cracker, the best kitty cat in all the land! im your biggest fan!! –jeno :)
you can’t help but smile at the post-it, your cheeks heating and a small riot of butterflies in your stomach
you chide yourself because you really don’t know this boy, if you think about it, and you shouldn’t be getting feelings over someone you’ve only ever spoken to in person once or twice
and the post-it was written to your cat, not you..so..
you glare slightly at cracker as she sniffs and noses at the treats on the table
but then take pictures of her with her mountain of gifts and send it to jeno with a bunch of heart emojis
jeno, eating lunch with his friends at the time, instantly smiles and blushes at your response, replying with smiley faces
jaemin, nudging jeno: that your gf?
renjun: if it’s the damn cat jeno i swear to god
jeno: uh
jeno doesn’t bother mentioning that although the cat pictures were cute, he was happier about the hearts you sent to him
a week later, you have another package delivery
its jeno again
the week after, another package. Jeno
the week after that, yet another package. who? jeno.
this goes on for at least another two months
you’re stocked on treats for cracker to last you the next several years
enough toys that your dorm is covered constantly, as if you own a toddler instead of a cat
your roommate thinks it’s the cutest thing ever that jeno is doing this and is CONVINCED that jeno is doing it for YOU, not for cracker
you, with red cheeks and looking at the floor to avoid eye contact: shut up u know nothing
until
it’s a dark day, a dark night, looming dark clouds stuck in the sky that threaten to unleash downpours at any second
and you’ve just left the vet that isn’t too far from your dorm
cracker isn’t with you
it was sudden, so abrupt you didn’t have time to process everything and you’re still slightly dazed
when you get back to your dorm your roommate is there, sitting with cups of tea ready for whatever you want to give her
she notices the absence of your best friend and understands instantly, hugging you gently as you lean into her and break down
cracker had fallen ill suddenly, by no fault of your own, and when you reached the vet you were already in tears with a tight stomach, as if you knew what was coming
the vet told you with sad eyes the best option was to leave cracker with her and let her do what she has to, to save cracker a lot of pain
after a teary but warm goodbye, you saw cracker for the last time
the following day, at such bad timing it felt like the world was laughing at you, you receive another package from jeno
you pick the package up but don’t open it
you ask your roommate to inform that stupid pet instagram about cracker, a bitter tone to your voice
even though cracker was your cat and so her death shouldn’t be anyone else’s business, you knew people would start asking questions if cracker no longer appeared on the page
you assume jeno will see the account’s post about the loss of cracker and he does, sending you a short but sweet message saying cracker was the best cat ever, which she was, and that she lived the best life with the best owner, which she did
you don’t reply though, too choked up to look at the message for too long
jeno asks renjun about you every day and a week or two later he’s glad to hear you’re feeling much better and are getting back into routine
one night, a friday, you’re in your dorm typing an essay when you hear a faint meow
you instantly ignore it, putting it down to you still not being quite used to complete silence in your dorm
but then you hear it again, and again, and it doesn’t sound like cracker’s meows
it sounds smaller, weaker almost, and like its coming from right outside your door
even though you’re still slightly convinced that you’re going insane you walk towards your door
you open it tentatively and just enough that you can use one eye to look into the hallway
and there
is a little black kitten
staring up at you
it’s the smallest thing, all black with bright green eyes that look too big for it’s body
and it lets out the same meow you had been hearing that you thought you were imagining
you open your door fully, bending down to gently pet the kitten and look around the hallway to find who left the kitten here
you scan the hallway a couple of times before you notice a head of black hair peeking from the end of the hallway, their eyes wide when you make eye contact with them
slowly, the person steps out from the wall they were hid behind to approach you
it’s jeno
you’re still in shock when he reaches you, and you just stare up at him with an open mouth
“do you like him?”
the words bring you back to earth and you nod before looking at the kitten again, asking, “is he mine?”
jeno nods and smiles widely, “all yours.”
you stand up with the kitten in your arms, the soft creature already snuggling and getting comfortable in your arms, “are you sure?”
jeno giggles at you and you realise he’s much more attractive than you remember, so handsome it makes you flustered
“the second i saw him i thought he’d be perfect for you. there’s something special about him.” jeno shrugs
when you look at the kitten again you repeatedly say thank you to jeno
you’re so surprised by this gift you’re not quite sure what to do with yourself
or what this means
but jeno seems to understand that even though you’re thankful you’re not sure where to go from here
so when he reaches over to very lightly smooth his fingertips over the kitten’s head, he says
“i thought this kitten could be our child. you can have full custody, though. i’ll just stay over on the weekends.”
and you can’t believe what you just heard
your child? stay over at the weekend?
you laugh a little in disbelief
“what does any of that even mean?”
jeno forces out a laugh and jiggles his shoulders slightly as if to compose himself
“this is my, obviously terrible, attempt at asking you on a date.”
oh
you’re in shock all over again, and jeno reaches behind his head to scratch his neck awkwardly
“i mean- you don’t have to. im not forcing you to-though the cat makes it seem like i am, doesn’t it? i don’t mean it like that, i swear. the kitten is yours i promise-“
when jeno sees you smiling at him he stops talking, eyebrows furrowed to show he doesn’t quite understand why you’re looking at him like that
“i’d love to go on a date with you, jeno.”
jeno nods at you several times as he processes the words, then says “great!” with a thumbs up
you smile at each other then, and it’s a warm atmosphere with the sleeping small kitten in your arms
after your first date, and many others, jeno, true to his word, starts staying over on the weekends to look after the kitten
by that i mean he uses the kitten and his ‘custody’ over him to stay over and cuddle with you
even if it means he sneezes aggressively every five minutes
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dramazones · 6 years
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Oh Wow! Im finally here with a headcanon birth chart and analysis for jamie!
i'm on mobile so I cant even put this long ass post under a read more i am so fucking sowwy but anyways a lot of this was inspired from dewmie-in 's meta posts and also i rlly love astrology so pls follow them first of all or else ur a fake fan shhfhgjsjkfkd
☀️ ♓︎ Pisces Sun ♓︎ ☀️
There is no doubt that Jamie is a pisces sun. Some of the well known characteristics of a piscean are being the artistic ones, the ones more in touch with their emotions and the absolute dreamers of the zodiac, I can assure you this as a mercury and moon piscean!
And it’s quite obvious that these traits 100% match up to jamie’s surface character being a big theater nerd, writer, poet, and as an actor, he HAS to understand emotion in all its forms! While being the more compassionate of signs, that also comes with sympathy, and maybe even empathy.
to which he expresses when he tells steven that a good story with a quality protagonist HAS to include said protagonists struggles as well, now this might be a reach but perhaps this was self projecting after his own struggles in kansas, maybe even foreshadowing ooOoOh
(“a real hero must struggle” jamie struggles living in kansas, moves back to beach city, nails his first production and gains management position @ the theater, aka his heroic ending i guess idk, then more theater related accomplishments as mentioned in letters to lars ofc)
☽♎︎ Libra Moon ♎︎☽
One of the biggest desires for any libra placement is balance, And the moon sign being the emotion sign, Libra moons desire an emotional balance as much as they do in their environment. Libra Moons can also be known as a “people person” while typically depending on the study of others to lean their own nature.
Jamie fits the Libra moon description being a sort of people person himself. Though he’s capable of keeping a friendly conversation with just about anyone, There’s also no doubt that this guy has severe anxiety that affects his communication with others along with his emotional stability (even affecting him physically). The thing is that he’s managed to keep the anxiety and his social skills much more balanced the more we see him or i guess as time passes, not one of them overpowering the other. (see venus in scorpio as to why he limits himself socially as much as he would his anxiety)
While he desires emotional balance that also comes with a feeling of frustration and defeat when things are even slightly out of balance (also a symptom of anxiety ; easily irritated/defeated) such as his improv performance in letters to lars, ending his performance within a minute after feeling overwhelmed as it started going south.
So while there are several moments of him maintaining an emotional balance he also has another side of the scale that’s less balanced (astrology word play lmao) such as a general lifestyle balance, also nonexistent for jamie (even though your lifestyle heavily affects your behavior) in a sense that he lacks of a healthy sleep schedule being a mailman AND an actor, one occurring from the early morning to the afternoon and the other job occurring at night. Probably irrelevent but its MY sleepover and Ill add as much necessary info in this birth chart reading as i please.
Im also including buddys book as an example because though it was only jamie being the faceclaim for buddy theres no denying that since historical friction theres at least some parallels between the two characters sharing the same traits (being writers, returning to beach city to prosper in their careers, being absolute drama kings)
♀️♏︎ Scorpio Venus ♏︎♀️
One of the biggest aspects to Jamie’s character INCLUDES being an absolute sucker for romance so lets get this bread and talk abt his relationships w/ everyone and his views on love uwu
Scorpio being a water sign means healing is one of the largest aspects to the sign. Healing nonetheless comes with a relation to trauma being from the planet representing death itself. Life and Death go hand in hand to define each other, ya feel me.
while were on the topic of death lets bring back the parallelism between jamie and buddy thats been around since historical friction. in the play buddy is presumed dead up until william reaches beach city. ok. so hear me out. perhaps that was foreshadowing for jamie’s traumatic near death encounter with topaz and aqua. remember how I said the water element represents healing as well as trauma??? It all kinda ties in yall...
ANYWAYS It’s safe to say that Jamie is a person that’s been through his rock bottom AND trauma already (his death if you will), struggling to live a happy, or even regular (lets face it as far as we know the only thing he came back to beach city with was sunglasses, bitch was broke) life in kansas, the abduction, its not something you can heal from overnight. While he does show symptoms of severe anxiety (to say the very least) even after the abduction he’s also grown closer to working on healing, moving on from his overwhelming fear of rejection by prospering in theater (him coming back to life if u will), and as for anything directly related to the abduction is unknown, but its very likely he’s working on moving on from that on his own as far as we know!!
which brings up the next trait of a scorpion venusian! They prefer to be a mystery in order to protect themselves as a result of fear of getting hurt for trusting/opening up too much. The first time we see jamie since the abduction is during the re-election in dewey wins, where he doesn’t seem affected at all. Yes, Jamie is a pretty open book for the most part (see dewmie-in’s analogy to in/out of the closet in historical friction) however theres also moments where he limits himself, or perhaps another side to himself, a far more passionate side…
Holding back tears during his drama zone and waiting until hes alone to be excited abt delivering his letter in love letters, playing it cool when earning theater director position in historical friction, not to mention his room SHOULD play a very huge role in his secretive side. (see brodingle’s post on jamie’s room, his casual side vs his passionate side)
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the venus in scorpio (or any scorpio placement rlly) also remains a secret not truly by choice, but theyre also studying others of interest. being an actor, Jamie should know a thing or two on body language and raw emotion as he sees it.
And finally, The venus is scorpio is a devoted, passionate, and emotionally attached lover. in love letters he falls for someone easily, and even if he learned in the end love at first sight isnt real he is most definitely the type to fall easily based on emotional connection alone! Also, his fear of rejection can easily play into his love life as well. Being in kansas getting constantly rejected and returning back home out of not just defeat but most likely homesickness as well. He missed his stable job. he wants stability, loyalty, commitment! yeah ok thts all i got for now ladies!
♂️♍︎ Virgo Mars ♍︎♂️
Mars being the planet of impulsiveness, energy, initiation and “doing it” being born under the sign of doing it efficiently and orderly gives a handful of traits that completely match up to Jamie and the way he puts out his energy into the world
Jamie has been the type to not just instantly put his energy into something new, but he’s also put his energy into mastering said thing! While Mars is the planet of impusiveness, Virgo is the sign of patience, the Virgo mars is a firm believer of practice makes perfect, and striving for overall perfect, which does in fact get overwhelming for Jamie the perfectionist.
In historical friction, though hesitant, he was not afraid to critique and analyze dewey’s writing skills. And although he was anxious again to go against deweys script and use pearls version instead, he went with pearls because he desperately needed to execute his first play flawlessly. this also occurs again in letters to lars, when his improv performance doesnt go as planned he doesnt just end it from there, in fact, he still has that sense of patience to critique his cast members on stage before getting completely irritated when they dont comply. imo its important to note this duality of patience and impulsiveness because this is an anxiety inducing combination that heavily matches up to Jamies energy.
it’s also important to bring Jamie’s room back in this, because while it was creepy as shit its also FILLED with books, and has really fancy stationery meaning he is in fact a writer. The Mars in Virgo is an attentive to detail oriented person, and being a writer, Jamie not only reads others’ works, he records his own with plenty of detail as seen in his love letter to garnet. Its in his nature by now to have an eye for detail as seen in his room, his costumes, his writing, etc.
Its very likely that his venus and his mars sign do sort of relate in a sense of the way he will present himself. The virgo mars wants a deep connection as the next person but refuses to express that “passionate side” as much as others, preferring to remain casual or present a “cool exterior” which plays into the venus in scorpio’s preference for a secretive side or to remain a mystery.
lets also not forget Jamie’s mime performance in Sadie’s Song. His body language easily read as excited and desperate for perfectionism. Theres no denying he spent time and energy into his act, probably studying mimes and all lol
plus the virgo mars being an attentive to detail type of person, scorpio venus’ silent study on their person of interest and libra moon’s dependance on the study of others to learn how to express emotion when and where and how all tie into each other. Jamie depends on detail before well, doing! he is the type to not just think before acting but hes also gotten quite anxious overthinking as well!
The Taurus Ascendant is a sucker for stability, loyalty, especially to their passions with change being their biggest weakness, very fitting to Jamie. Stability is what made Jamie return to beach city from Kansas because he was not used to such a drastic change in an unstable life, doing the absolute opposite of prospering in his acting career, another big desire for a taurus rising btw, they thrive for success!
They also need a sense of security and any chance at risking that security is a big no-no for the Taurus Ascendant. Jamie’s constant fear of rejection, his anxiety before a production that could make or break his career, he desires a sense of reassurance and security that will assure him that things will not turn out as horribly as his anxiety’s (cough drama zone cough) made it out to be.
⬆️♉︎ Taurus Rising ♉︎⬆️
now, in Reunited, hes completely moved on from garnet at this point. This takes places after the abduction, the only thing that would really be on his mind rn is healing and finding peace again with himself and in his surroundings. while hes handled this healing process alone (as far as we know) hes also learned about what he wants for himself including his love life. seeing garnet extremely happy and married and all makes him defeated for a moment not because “uUuuUUhH shes the one that got away!” its because he truly desires a passionate and devoted relationship as ruby and sapphires! which brings up the next topic!
In relationships, the Taurus Ascendant won't easily break up with someone they gave their heart to. Jamie wants a partner thats going to be as devoted and passionate as himself. He needs that sense of commitment and loyalty from someone and probably wouldn’t handle something as emotionless as one night stands for example! Any taurus placement has the same desires for romance as scorpio placements to be quite honest here, im just sayin as a venus in taurus and scorpio rising lmao.
🌊 Water Dominant 🌊
Ok so the thing is heres the thing. Out of all four astrological elements, Jamie exudes water energy the most, then earth, then fire, and lastly air. He’s not just an emotional person, he’s also an optimistic person, even when he overthinks things, he continuously looks into the future rather than his past so I think its important to note he also has that “psychic” aspect to him as well as having a strong sense of someone else’s emotions as much as his own.
let me also add in dewmie-in’s post where they point out tht jamie does in fact have a literal reocurring theme with water so even if he turns out to like not be a water sun sign in canon (highly doubt there will ever be a canon bday for him lmao the entire point of this post tho) theres no way hes gonna not be associated with water coincidentally. so if u didnt read their post tldr: being a fucking buffoon in the literal rain, throwing letters into the ocean, staring at the ocean on his free time, (aka during working ours, worlds okayest mailman) cries easily, buddy dying in water, jamie nearly being killed as instructed by a gem named aqua, jamie surviving in water after being THROWN off the ship. (i added a few more btw hshfhhdjd)
so yeah thats that on that, theres plenty more planet placements than that in a birth chart but i just felt like doing the usual ones i guess :P
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