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#incorrect avengers quotes

Steve: Um, Bucky? What do you think you’re doing?

Bucky, using his prosthetic as an extension to reach for the banana bread that was intentionally put out of his reach: Uhhhh who the hell is Bucky

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Steve:

Bucky:

Bucky: You think I would be a good pirate

Steve:

Steve: I think you would be the best pirate

Bucky: :’)

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Tony: When first winked at me, it’s like you proposed

Stephen: What?? That makes no fucking sense-

Rhodey: Don’t talk to your wife like that

Tony: Yeah >: )

Stephen:

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Thor, every 30 minutes: [kick open the door of the lab] I would DIE for you Banner

Bruce, not even paying attention anymore: then perish

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Bucky after his resurrection: If I die again next year you all have to dress slutty at my funeral. It’s what I would’ve wanted.

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Peter: Hey MJ, wanna hear a funny joke?
MJ: I’m more into dark humor.
Peter: *turns off the lights* So the joke goes...
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bucky: *talking to Sam* i went to a club yesterday
steve: *looks up from where he was lying on the couch*
bucky: i went to a club wearing fishnets
steve: *sits up, pays close attention*
bucky: i learnt how to ride a motorbike
steve: hey sorry to interrupt but sit on my face
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Tony: Steve would you take a bullet for me?
Steve: ...yes?
Natasha: *barges in angrily* TONY!
Tony, already running: thank you for your sacrifice
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Sam: The internet is more than just naked people. You know that, right?
Bucky: Not MY internet.
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You, a fool: the brother Russos use fake scenes in the trailer, omg, everything we saw is a fucking lie, nobody is going to be okay, Tony going to die, Steve going to die, omg, hELP

Me, an intellectual: remember when Marvel fucking lie to our stupids faces saying endgame wasn’t the name of avengers endgame? Because I do

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Tony: I’ve had three anxiety attacks and eight cups of coffee today I’m immortal

Tony: *Collapses*

Stephen: 

Stephen: *Continues reading*

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