#[ man his blog is turning 4 this year ]

[erodasfishtacos]

Picked The Right One

prompt: ceorry first vs most recent time

word count: 8.5k+

warnings: teeth rotting fluff, smut

AN: hiiii. Long time! I’m not posting on here anymore really but I wanted to post a one shot to show my appreciation for my fans who can’t subscribe to my patreon.

I post 4-5 8k+ fics a month for $3USD

Love youuuuu isla x

-

YN had never ever pictured herself where she is currently at right now.

Because currently, she was trying to pick between two different dresses as she went on her fifth date with a billionaire.

It sounded comical even in her head.

YN never really imagined who she would end up with but she had been through a handful of duds and thought that might set the precedent for the rest of her life.

Up until Harry, she barely even made it past a date with someone before she’s calling it off because she can’t see herself with the person.

The last time YN went out on a date, the man ‘forgot’ his wallet after ordering three imported beers that cost YN nearly half of a paycheck.

Their dates had been going well, YN felt less and less nervous every time that she saw Harry but she still felt the need to impress him.

She shouldn’t have googled his dating history even though it doesn’t confirm anything from his past - he has always been secretive and private about his personal life.

However, there are some paparazzi shots of him leaving exclusive night clubs with pretty, modelesque girls in the background behind him.

And thousands of gossip blogs who loved to predict who he was sleeping with and who he was in a relationship with.

He had disclosed to YN that he has only had one serious relationship that ended horribly when he was just beginning his career which would have been years ago.

YN’s still in her bathrobe, Harry’s coming to pick her up any moment, and she’s wondering how nice the bra and underwear set she picked out needs to be.

Tonight was the first time Harry was taking her to his house or from what she saw on google - his 23.3 million pound estate.

YN had been surprised that he hadn’t been pushy like other dates who tried to get in her pants.

The sexual tension has definitely been building but Harry hadn’t made any move to do anything about it.

He hadn’t asked her back to his house after any of the five dates but their kisses had been getting longer and steamier.

Particularly after the last one.

-

Harry always parked his car and walked her up to her apartment door, she appreciated that he tried to not crinkle his nose at that mildew odor or how run down the interior of the building is.

When they get to her burnt orange door, YN unlocks it and turns back around to him as he watches her with a small smile.

“Do you want to come in?” YN offers even though she knows that he’ll decline, she’s always hopeful.

“I want to but I shouldn’t. Let me be a gentleman,” Harry simpers softly, his voice deep and accent thick, his hands come up to cup her jaw, “But I am going to steal a kiss.”

“Please,” YN agrees with excitement pumping through her veins, he leans down to connect their lips and he’s such a good kisser.

As soon as their lips connect, YN has to swallow down a moan because even though it’s just a kiss - she’s never been more turned on in her life.

She parts her lips when he swipes his tongue across them, pushing inside once she opens up, and stroking her tongue with his.

His body is pressed up into hers, cornering her more against the door and YN’s lets the smallest whimper slip.

She’s about to be embarrassed but Harry growls at the noise and breaks a part for the moment, “You’re so fuckin’ sexy.”

YN can’t even blink before his mouth is back on hers, holding her jaw a bit firmer, and biting at her bottom lip.

She had never physically felt herself getting wet until right now when she actually cold feel it start to coat her folds.

“Shame on you,” A scratchy voice hisses from behind them, making them split apart quickly, and they look back to see YN’s neighbor.

“Sorry, Mrs. Jameson,” YN waves her hand as the woman glares at her, shaking her head before disappearing into the apartment across from them.

Harry’s thumb comes up to pull at her swollen bottom lip, “You’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

YN’s never been so bold as now when she leans back up to kiss him again, “Please, come in?”

Harry entertains one more long kiss before he’s breaking them apart and taking a step back, “Let me do this right, pet. I’m going to make it special.”

“You do this with all your dates?” YN jokes lamely because she just can‘t imagine that she’s the first girl he’s done this with.

Harry’s smile falters a bit but he recovers quickly, his thumb now brushing over her cheekbone.

“I’m a bit embarrassed to say,” He chuckles as his eyes dart to the side in nervousness, “I haven’t been this much of a gentleman in the past is all I will say.”

“Why is it different for me? I’m not anything special,” She replies because she doesn’t think she’s nearly anything compared to the other beautiful women he’s had on his life.

“Hey,” His voice is firmer and offended by her comments, his green eyes serious and honeyed when he looks at her, “You’re the most special person I’ve ever met.”

-

YN startles when she hears a knock at her front door, glancing over to the clock, and Harry is exactly on time for their date.

She’s still staring at her lingerie sets when the noise echos through her apartment, her hair and makeup was at least done but she was still only in a towel.

After the second knock comes, YN’s cursing as she rushes to the door, swinging it open, and Harry’s in the hallways looking like he just walked off the set of a photoshoot in a perfect fitting suit and styled hair.

He raises an eyebrow as he looks her up and down, “I’m not going to complain if this is all you want to wear tonight. Much easier to take it off of you.”

Oh, they were definitely fucking.

YN moves aside to let him in, he ducks down to kiss her cheek before sitting on the edge of her sofa.

“I just need like two more minutes,” She tells quickly, why was her heart rate spiking anytime he was around?

“I’ll be here,” Harry replies as his eyes trace around her apartment, picking up a book on her coffee table.

YN takes a deep breath when she’s back in her room, snatching the sexier set off the bed before shimmying a recently purchased black dress overtop.

Harry stands up and straightens his broad shoulders when she comes back into the living room, “Bloody hell. You look like a dream.”

YN’s stomach flips at his seemingly sincere compliment but she can’t control the intrusive comments that follow in her own mind.

You’re not as pretty as that one model he was seen with

You’re not a model

He’s just being nice

“Thank you. You look handsome,” She replies nervously, she hadn’t been this nervous on their last two or three dates but it felt like the first time all over again.

Harry isn’t dumb, he can sense it but he’s kind enough not to call her out on it as they quietly walk to his car.

After slipping in the passenger seat of the exotic car, a new one for every date, and Harry begins to drive off - it almost feels tense for a moment.

Harry’s hand twitches on the wheel, hesitating before asking, “Is it okay if I touch you?”

It makes YN feels guilty that now she’s made Harry nervous enough that he didn’t feel comfortable enough to reach over.

“You don’t have to ask,” YN assures him with more confidence in her voice as his one hand moves from the well to her thigh, his hand was big, making her thick thigh look nearly encompassed, the metal of his rings was cold against her skin.

She wanted to smack herself when she felt the arousal starting to creep in, clenching her thighs together a bit too obviously because Harry smirks to himself but doesn’t make a remark.

-

“Thi-this is your house?” YN’s eyes widen when they pull through the gates, men dressed in black waving them through before the gate closes quickly behind them.

The pictures on google didn’t do the beauty of the sprawling estate justice.

It was so massive that YN couldn’t imagine just one person living alone in there and it made her a little sad to think about Harry in this near castle all by himself.

Harry gives her a tour of some of the rooms where all YN can do is nod along to what he’s saying, compliment the astounding beauty, and not have any doubt why his house has been mentioned in Architectural Digest so much.

Then he’s leading her to the kitchen where YN takes a seat on a stool while Harry begins pulling out the ingredients to make dinner.

YN cannot stop staring at everything around her - she’s never seen anything close to this and to think that she’s going on date with someone who lives this extravagantly.

The conversation flows easily while Harry moves around the kitchen to prepare the chicken Alfredo, there’s plenty of laughter and quite a few stolen kisses before they sit down for dinner.

-

Towards the end of the meal, the conversation becomes more serious, and Harry takes a sip of his wine before stating, “None of this impresses you, does it?”

YN’s taken aback by the question, he doesn’t seem angry but he just seems confused as he puts down his fork and knife, “What do you mean?”

Harry shakes his head like he doesn’t know how to get out the words he wants to, “It’s just…the cars, my house, it doesn’t seem like you care. I don’t mean that in a bad way, it just doesn’t seem to be impressing you and I…I don’t really know how to take that.”

“I’ve never brought a date to my home before but still, usually most of the conversation on previous dates has been about my business or my cars or my estates. You haven’t bought any of that up once or made a big deal about it.”

YN can’t read Harry very in this moment, she doesn’t know him well enough, and his face is smooth, calm but just the tiniest furrow in his brow gives away emotion.

“It’s very impressive, the life you’ve built,” YN chooses her words carefully, putting down her glass of wine, “It’s something you should be proud of. I haven’t brought any of those things up because those things aren’t who you are. I’ve been asking you about family, hobbies, likes, dislikes because I care about you as a person, not as a ‘billionaire’ or a ‘public figure.”

Harry’s face distorts a little bit, he almost looks a bit devastated as he looks down at his plate, and he doesn’t say anything which makes YN think she said something wrong.

“I’m sorry, I just…” YN trails off with a sigh.

“Don’t apologize, please. You have absolutely nothing to apologize for,” Harry glances back up with widen eyes, he reaches across the table to put his hand over her, “I’ve just never had someone care about me, I don’t think. At least not for a very long time.”

YN moves her hand away, only to move it atop his and squeezes, “I think it’s lovely that you’ve created a very comfortable and successful life for yourself but I’m falling for you as a person, not the cars or the house.”

And a blinding crooked smile breaks out on Harry’s face, YN loved when his dimples popped out and carved into his cheeks, “Falling for me? Are you falling for me, darling?”

YN’s feel the heat rises up into her cheeks, looking down at the table for a moment but then Harry’s pushing his chair back and standing up - he’s strides over to YN’s chair and helps her out of it, pulling her up and into his chest.

“No need to be embarassed, S’just me,” Harry rumbles as he tucks his finger up her chin and lifts her head so that he can connect their lips softly, YN’s hands coming to rest on his chest.

She giggles though, shaking her head at his words - it makes him pull back and ask, “What’s funny, hm?”

“You say it’s just you,” YN murmurs, their lips are stil brushing against one another’s as they talk, “But that’s the issue, you have me on my toes. I want to impress you, not embarrass myself.”

“M’already impressed,” Harry tells her between little pecks, “Impressed how smart you are, how independent and free-thinking you, by how fuckin’ gorgeous you are. You don’t need to be embarassed if you’re falling f’me because sweetheart, m’pretty much already gone for you. You’re everything that I want.”

“Please,” YN says softly because they basically just confessed their fondness for each other and the dark sweet smell of his cologne was making her dizzy.

She would never consider herself sex hungry until this point, she had always been more than okay waiting a few dates to get intimate but YN had never craved someone else’s body like this.

“Please what, sweet girl,” Harry replies against her lips, he had her pressed up against an oak cabinet that looked to be displaying expensive, hand-painted plates and vases - the pieces shook a bit when her back hit the glass.

A single glass ends up falling off one of the higher shelf’s, shattering behind them, and YN begins to profusely apologizing, “Oh my god, I’m so sorry.”

And Harry’s unconcerned that a five thousand dollar wine glass just shattered as he shushes her quiet, “S’fine. Just want to kiss you,” He mumbles against her lips.

YN presses further into the kiss, her hands moving from his chest up and around his neck as she parts her lips, allowing their tongues to brush as his hands move to her hips - massaging at the plush as his leg sneaks in between hers, making it so she couldn’t clench her thighs together.

“Want to-“ YN gets distracted halfway through her sentence when his hands begin to trail up her sides, up towards her chest but he instead teases his fingers along her rib cage.

“Want to…..?” Harry copies her, he even tastes good like his rich, dry red wine that they had been drinking at dinner.

“Harry,” YN huffs out when he pulls back just an inch, “You know what I mean.”

Harry kisses once more before responding, “Tell me. Do you want me to touch you?”

YN nods eagerly, she wanted so bad to press their hips together to see if he was just as needy as she was but he was purposely not doing that, “Yes.”

“Where do you want my hands or maybe even my mouth?” His voice was unfairly raspy as he teases her with his words, his hands dancing upwards until he finally cups her breasts, “Here? I think you probably have the prettiest nipples I’ve ever seen? You want me to pinch them or suck at them until their puffy and hard?”

Fuck, YN’s never been so turned on in her life.

“I want that,” YN responds tightly as he kneads at her breasts for only a moment before his hands are trailing back down the length of her dress, “Please take me upstairs, Harry.”

“You’re so fuckin’ pretty when you beg, haven’t even told you what I’m going to do to your cunt,” He chuckles as his lips wander from hers to the hinge of her jaw where he drags his teeth across the thin skin, “I’m going to take such good care of you. Get you so ready for me that you’ll be crying on my fingers.”

“You’re all talk at this point,” YN points out but it doesn’t come off as bratty as she’d hope because of how breathless she is by now.

That’s all it takes to have Harry taking YN’s hand and leading her up the winding grand staircase to his bedroom - his room wasn’t overly decorated and was pretty simple with high ceilings and a bed that could easily fit five people.

Harry steps away from YN for a moment, going around the room and turning on the lights which illuminated the room in more of a romantic glow.

As he did, YN’s brain became a bit less hazy and the reality of what was about to happen sunk in, especially when Harry came over and murmurs, “Can I take this off of you?” As his fingers curled into the hem of her dress near her thighs.

And for some reason, all the insecurities and anxiety that she felt earlier about not being able to compare to the other women comes flashing into her mind but she finds herself nodding and saying, “Yes.”

Harry’s pulls the hem off the dress up slowly and in between kisses until YN is raising her arms up so that he can fully take it off of her, just leaving her in her lingerie that she bought off a cheap boutique online - nothing like what those models wore.

“Fuckin’ hell, are you trying to kill me?” Harry groans when he takes in her in just her bra and underwear, his eyes looking all over like they couldn’t decide one place to stay put but he is kissing her shoulder before he’s kneeling down in front of her.

That was sight that YN never wanted to forget, Harry down on his knees in front of her, his lips right at her belly and his strong hands moving behind her to knead at her backside.

She didn’t realize she was trembling until Harry pulls back with a frown.

YN wants to shout at him to come back when he stands back up and puts a foot of distance between them, “Are you sure you want to, pet? Your legs are shaking. I hope I haven’t made you feel pressured in anyway. I apol-“

And she wants to cry because that’s not it at all.

She instantly starts shaking her head in disagreement, interrupting him by putting her hand up, “No…I want to. I really want to and you haven’t pressured me one bit. I’m just…being stupid.”

Harry’s shoulders slump a bit in relief and he steps back over to her, his hands caressing over the caps of her shoulder blades, “If it’s not that than why are you shakin’ like a leaf, sweetheart?”

YN squeezes her eyes shut and takes a deep inhale, deciding honesty is probably the best route in this situation, “I know I shouldn’t have but I googled you. And I just saw all these pictures of you leaving clubs and events with these models and…I know I don’t look anything like them and I’m not as sexy as them. I’m scared you’ll be disappointed with the experience.”

Harry’s quiet for a moment as he cradles her head in between his hands, his face is sincere and a bit sad when he tells her, “I’ve never liked someone like I like you. And this may sound crude or forward but I’ve never wanted to lay someone out and make them come as many times as they can like I want to do with you. I’ve never been more attracted to someone in my life.”

“Any person in the past five years that I’ve hooked up with have been nothing more than that. And in the past two years or so, I can't even remember the last time I’ve done that. I know you might not believe me but I haven’t been with anyone in quite some time. It stopped being fun when every single person I got with just wanted to use me for clout, popularity, bragging rights.”

“I believe you,” YN tells him, relief starting flooding into her body because he was so sincere and even though she was surprised that he was that he was so attracted to her, she believed him full heartedly.

“You act like you’re not drop dead gorgeous,”Harry frowns as he brushes a stray hair off of her forehead, “The prettiest thing I’ve ever seen. Never been able to look away from you since the first time you bumped into me.”

“I want you to do what you just said you wanted to do,” YN smiles with a shyness that is unusual for her, pressing herself up against him while he was still in his suit and now she was almost bare.

The delighted, hungry expression returns to Harry’s face when he hears that, taunting her as he shrugs out of his suit jacket, “Oh, remind me. What did I say, pet?”

But his lips were running down the column of her neck, his hands brushing the bra straps off her shoulders until they fell, and his lips taking their place.

“You’re such a tease,” YN accuses as she curls her fingers into his hair.

And YN’s never been teased like this, never had such buildup that wasn’t even foreplay yet, every other guy she’s been with - it had all been perfunctory and boring, predictable.

“S’not time to lay you out on m’bed yet,” Harry titters as his fingers come to her back, running along the band of her bra, and ghosting over the clasp, “Have to get to know your body first. Play with every single part of it and make sure you’ll never forget how good I’m going to make you feel.”

YN’s nearly sighs in relief when he finally slips the bra off, moving back to look at her, and she doesn’t even have a moment to feel self-conscious before he’s letting out an obscene moan at the sight, cupping them before moving down to suck one of her nipples into his mouth.

It was like he was starved for touch as he pulled at the nub between his teeth before lapping at it as his hand massaging at the neglected one, his fingers moving up to rub and pinch.

“Oh…fuck,” YN whines as she lets her head fall back, hair cascading down past her shoulders as she holds his head as close as possible to her and it’s never felt this good before when someone touched her chest.

Harry switches between the two, taking his time to languidly run his tongue over both of them after he pushes them together, and sucks at them with tight pressure.

YN’s never known that just her nipples being played with could make her aroused but she knew there had to be a damp spot on the front of her panties as Harry started walking them back towards the bed.

“That feels so good,” YN breathes at when he begins to nip at her buds, causing just the dullest pain pain that quickly melted into more pleasant sensation.

“Sweetheart, this is just the beginning. M’going have you crying with pleasure by the time I’m done with you,” Harry growls as YN’s knees hit the bed and she falls back, letting herself hit the fluffy comforter, “Do you like overstimulation?”

YN’s wriggles further onto the bed, bringing Harry with her by the hand wrapped around the nape of Harry’s neck, and tells him, “I don’t know.”

Harry pulls back from her tits, looking at her with a confused expression, “What do you mean? Do you like when someone makes you come more than once? Like when it almost feels too much.”

Oh god, she didn’t want to admit this.

“I…The guys I’ve been with have never made me come,” YN mumbles as she adverts her gaze up to the ceiling in humiliation for a moment before looking back down at Harry who’s resting his chin on her belly.

Harry’s face goes blank, a bit dumbfounded as he asks, “Are you fucking with me?”

“Stop,” YN giggles as she playfully kicks at him, “It’s embarrassing I know. I just haven’t been with anyone who’s been talented in that department, okay?”

Harry’s hand wraps around her ankle, a cocky smile coating his face, “Oh darlin’, m’going to show you my worth tonight. Now bend your knees for me.”

YN obliges, bending her knee, and watches as Harry kneels at the end of the bed - his button-up shirt was open for the most part, showing off his defined pectoral muscles and the butterfly that was inked below.

He moves his arms underneath her thighs which made it easier to pull her bum to the edge of the bed and he drapes her legs in the crooks of his elbows and her clothed core is right in front of him.

YN lays back and closes her eyes, just allowing herself to feel as she feels her stomach moves up and down quickly as she sucks in air, and she’s shaking now but it’s in pure anticipation for what’s to come.

She’s waiting for Harry to shimmy off her underwear but instead, Harry ducks forward and begins to kiss at her puffy mound and folds over the thin fabric.

YN tries to move her hips to get more but Harry keeps her in place, he moves down in the slightest and pushes in between her folds until he pushes the fabric is against her clit with his tongue.

“H, there,” YN murmurs softly as he begins to stroke at her with his tongue while his hands grip her bum and pull her further into his mouth as he makes the underwear sodden with her slick and his mouth.

It was overwhelmingly good to have the pressure on her bud like she’d never had before, her hands gripping the comforter that she was laying on.

YN lets out the most spoiled whine when Harry pulls his head back and he raises his eyebrow at her, he moves his one arm so that he can reach between them and put his thumb right on her clit where he gives her the most torturous, slow rubs he could.

“You’re a greedy lil’ thing, aren’t you?” Harry hums as his free hand moves up to thumb at her pebbled nipples, “Already getting obsessed with my touch. Just like it should be, never let you leave my bed. You’re a fuckin’ slice of heaven.”

“I’m not greedy,” YN denies weakly as her hips push up to get more friction applied from his thumb to where she’s throbbing for him.

“You’re riding my thumb right now,” Harry chuckles meanly, biting at the skin of her belly hard enough to make her squeak, “Most greedy lil’ thing I’ve ever seen.”

Harry keeps YN in this purgatory of pleasure and pure frustration for a good thirty minutes of switching between his mouth and thumb on her clit through her underwear.

She could feel hot tears prickling at the corner of her eyes because she wanted to come, she wanted him.

YN needed Harry and it seemed like she might die if she doesn’t in this moment even if it’s dramatic - she’s never craved anything like she’s craving his touch.

Harry catches it as soon as the first tear dribbles down her cheek, “Am I making you desperate, baby? M’not trying to be cruel. I’m just trying to prove to you that you should keep me around, y’know?”

What is he even talking about?

She’s definitely keeping him.

And she tells him so.

“Wh-why do you have to prove it? I’m keeping you, you’re mine,” YN gasps as he presses on her button just a little bit harder than before.

Harry preens at her words, “Say it again and I’ll make you come. Say it loud for me, pet.”

“You’re mine, Harry,” YN tells him again, voice louder and more confident, “You’re mine, please. Please need it.”

“Give you anything,” He murmurs, pleased as can be as he moves to the band of her panties and pulls them down her thighs until she’s bare.

He’s then helping her move up and to the center of the bed, splayed out with love bites all over her chest and belly, the sheen of his spit-slick kisses reflecting in the dim light.

Harry fucking finally relents when he burrows down between her thighs after shucking off his dress shirt and he uses two fingers to split her open to reveal what her puffy folds had been hiding.

“You’re going to make me come without even touching me,” Harry abdomishes as he stares at her, “How do you have the prettiest face, nipples, and cunt? It doesn’t make any sense, darling.”

YN felt like she was a rubber band about to snap, she couldn’t take anymore and she just needed him to do something because her orgasm has been building for the last half-hour.

“Please,” YN whispers quietly, it was pathetic and desperate but she let out a shutter from her sniffles - she’s never felt this good.

Harry pushes himself up to kiss her lips once before settling back down where he splits her folds open and gives her a firm, harsh lick from her core to clit.

His mouth stays there, pulling her clit between his lips and massaging it with his tongue while two of his thick fingers danced around her entrance before slowly tucking them up inside and curling forward.

YN came instantly, she swore she blacked out for a moment and saw stars but also felt a rush of fluid that she couldn’t figure out what is was until she finally comes back down to earth.

When YN sits up, she notices a small dark part of the comforter that was wet along with Harry’s face shining with slick.

“Oh my god,” YN gasps in horror as she realizes she not only just had her first orgasm from someone else but squirted on top of that.

Harry blinks up at her, he was just as surprised as he brought his hand back up where it was wet with her, “I’m not joking when I say that’s the hottest fucking thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”

And just like that, the humiliation is gone from her body and she’s giggling because he just looks so thrilled with himself.

She squeals excitedly when he pushes her back down and continues on, burying his face back between her legs.

When he licks at her sensitive, throbbing clit again - her legs kick out in reaction as pinpricks of overstimulation try to push Harry off.

But YN’s hand is wrapping up in his hair and keeping him down there.

She never had more than one orgasm at time, didn’t really know that she could, and she was shocked when she felt her next one building within a minute or two.

“Harry, I’m close again,” YN warns as her thighs begin to shake, she so badly wanted to close them around Harry’s head but his broad shoulders are prohibiting her from doing that.

“Come on, sweet girl,” Harry encourages in between suckles and laps, moving up to nip at the hood of clit to give her a spike of dull pain before soothing it with his tongue, “Show me how good you can be.”

Oh, she does.

YN’s back arches and she doesn’t care about being embarrassed anymore when she lets out a long, high-pitched whine, a sound she’s never made before as her chest heaves when her second orgasm comes barreling over her.

“Baby, s’good,” YN mewls, uncaring when the pet name slips even though Harry’s been using them constantly, and when she’s starting to come down from the second one, she gently leads Harry by the hair until he’s crawling up over her and their lips are meeting again.

YN’s not worried about being shy anymore, not after Harry just made her come like that, and so when she’s running her hand down his chest, tracing over the muscles of his stomach, she doesn’t stop until she’s palming him in his dress pants.

“Shit,” He gruffs in surprise, breaking their kiss for a moment, and moaning when she traces the outline of his cock where it’s ready to be freed from his confines.

YN manages to wriggle until Harry gets the picture and rolls off of her, onto his back where now he’s splayed out with his stomach sucking in, his ribs dancing against his skin on every breath in.

He’s body was incredible, the definition of his muscles from his pecs to his abdominals, all the way down to where there’s a sharp cut leading into the dress pants.

She had to get her mouth on him and had to give him a bit of the same treatment he gave her, she figured out quickly that he loved being bit and given lovebites.

YN works her way from his neck down his chest, stopping to give attention to his nipples which he was surprisingly reactive to - bucking his hips up when she dragged her teeth along them.

When she finally gets to the fine dusting of hair leading into his pants, YN unbuttons and zips them before beginning to tug them down his narrow hip.

At first, she was going to tease him but her eagerness to see him and so she’s peeling down his briefs too until he’s bare to her too - god, he was just as perfect here as well which shouldn’t be a surprise.

His cock was far bigger than anyone man she had even been with, by far, but it wasn’t initimating to her because she so desperately wanted it inside her.

It was thick and she never thought she’d describe a dick as pretty but it was, the pink tip was wet and his skins was smooth velvet as she ran her hand down the length of it.

There was a reason he had big dick energy.

And YN puffs out a breath of frustration when Harry pulls her back up right before she puts her mouth on him, he chuckles at her furrowed brow like a disgruntled puppy.

“Stop pouting,” Harry smooths out the wrinkle between her eyebrows, “I’m so hard for you, pet. I’ll come if you tease me and I want to get in you. I want to show you how good I can be for you.”

YN doesn’t regret it when she leans down and bits his shoulder, making him hiss before she’s grumps, “You teased me for nearly an hour and I can’t even touch you. S’not fair.”

“Oh, I’m so sorry,” Harry pouts out his bottom lip condescendingly, “I promise there will be many more times to come where I’ll let you do whatever you want to me.”

“You better keep that promise,” YN warns but she’s about as intimidating as a baby deer.

Harry lets out a throaty laugh as he tucks a strand of hair behind her ear, “It’s not a hardship for me to promise you that you can have my cock whenever you want.”

He was filthy and YN was obsessed with it.

“Now need you to shush up,” Harry rumbles as he steadies YN where she’s sat across his thighs and sits up, scooting backwards until his back is against the headboard, “Gonna have you sit that pretty pussy on me. Gonna let you go as slow or fast as you want. Okay, baby?”

YN nods with a bit of nerves back in her as she straightens up and kneels further up until he’s bumping against her folds, she goes to reach to position him but Harry knocks her hand out of the way.

Harry presses forward until the plum tip of him parts her lips, finding her swollen clit and tapping himself against her which sends voltage shocks through her spine.

He paints himself down to her core, where he barely pushes in, YN’s stomach tense in anticipation before he’s moving back up to rub himself against her nerves.

She was so wet that there was soft noise as he teased, “Baby, do you hear how wet you are for me? Can’t believe how good you feel. Do you always get like this?”

YN shakes her head, swallowing dryly before telling him, “Never really got wet like this before. I, er, usually wasn’t enough other times and so they had to use lube.”

Harry’s expression is downright offended, “Nobody ever warmed you up, huh? Sounds like you’ve been with a bunch of chauvinistic pigs. I’ll always have you dripping down your thighs, pet.”

And she believes him.

YN’s still in a dazed state of his teasing when he doesn’t just push in a little but starts helping her sit down on him to finally get inside of her and god, she feels so full.

There’s no pain or stretch like she’s felt before with guys who were less endowed then him but he had gotten her so turned on and ready that there wasn’t anything but pure pleasure as he bottomed out .

He’s already nudging against an a livewired spot inside of her that she never felt before but knew was her g-spot, and his was just pressing on it by just being inside her.

“O-oh,” YN lets out a wanton moan as she begins grinding her hips, on every swivel her clit was bumping against the neatly trimmed hair on his pubic bone and the spot inside her being triggered by how thick and hard he was.

“That’s it, baby,” Harry sighs happily and he’s looking up at her with such awe before he’s pushing at the small of her back to get her upper body closer to his.

As she chases her own release, he’s kissing all over her, and it intimate as she’s ever been with someone as Harry just encourages her to make herself feel good with his body.

His lips are on her sternum, her belly, her shoulder, her face.

There was something about the way he kissed over her cheeks and jaw as she moans in pure ecstasy that made it romantic and made her feel closeness to her partner that she’d never felt before.

The soft whispers of encouragement against her temple as she got closer and closer to the edge, her thigh muscles were tired, “Please, H. Need you to make me feel good, please.”

And like that, Harry’s flipping them until YN’s splayed on her back once again, and he’s over top of her, his cross necklace tickling at her chest when props himself up on his elbows, either side of her head, and grinds his hips back into her.

YN can’t help but wrap her legs around Harry’s waist as he begins a steady rhythm of thrusts, leaning down to connect their lips together but YN can’t focus on it as she moans into his mouth.

“I need you to come f’me,” Harry pants lightly between pecks, his thrusts were becoming harder and he wasn’t pulling back as fast, “You’ve got me close, darling. Never had anyone feel so good on my cock.”

Harry doesn’t wait though, he’s going down on one arm to use his other to snake between their bodies to rub tight, purposeful circles on her bud until YN feels the band of tension snap and she’s digging her nails into his back as she comes for the third time.

And as soon as she does, Harry’s thrusting in twice more before stilling and letting out the sexiest, most filthy moan as he drops his head and let’s go, his moans were so low that YN didn’t even think his voice could get that deep and gravely like he’d been smoking.

YN’s become boneless, melting into the comfortable mattress, as she keeps her eyes shut - peaceful to feel the pinpricks of pain from overstimulation and how achey her thighs were from not usually using those muscles as much as she did tonight.

“Open your eyes f’me,” Harry murmurs softly after a moment, his thumb coming to sweep the drying tears off her cheeks and when YN whines in protest, he coos, “Just for a tick, darling. Look at me.”

YN blinks her eyes open, she’s exhausted and spent, and doesn’t feel like she could move if someone offered her a million dollars to do so as she meets Harry’s warm green eyes.

“I need to get you showered. M’not going to let you fall asleep all sticky and sweaty,” Harry titters as he begins to get off the bed, taking YN with him despite her weak whines of protest.

He coerces into his shower and YN was so tired that she couldn’t even appreciate that the shower head was on the ceiling and the water fell down like a rainforest storm.

YN stays leaned up against Harry, her head resting on his chest as he goes about lathering and massaging the shampoo into her hair with strong, magic fingers.

“Thank you,” YN mumbles after he washes out all the suds and moves onto scrubbing down her body, “I can clean myself.”

Harry stops where the washcloth is on her shoulder, “Do you not want me to do it?”

YN blinks rapidly again, coming back into focus, she dind’t want to offend him and she did want him too, “I do, it’s nice. I love it actually, I just don’t want you to feel like you have to do all of this because we had sex.”

Harry frowns at her, “Have you never heard of aftercare?”

“I have I just thought that was for like crazy bondage or something.”

He chuckles with a shake of his head, “It is definitely important for people to do that but it’s also important anytime there’s intense sex. I’m not doing this because I feel obligated before we just slept together. I want to continue to take care of you, not just in the way of sex but because you’re important to me.”

“Do you do this with every girl?” YN asks out loud and maybe it wasn’t an appropriate question but she wasn’t going to judge if he said ‘yes’, it was pure curiosity.

Harry eyes dart to the side, his expression turning into a bit of guilt like he’s remembering other times, “No. I’ve never been great about it and some of the times I probably should have but just left. I…I can’t tell you enough how different you are than the rest.”

YN’s giggles when Harry’s resumes washing down her body, making her stomach as he wipes her underarms, “It was the best sex I’ve ever had. I look forward to having a lot more of it with you.”

He perks up with a cute hopeful expression, “Yeah? I…Do you think you would want to be exclusive with me?”

“As in we just date each other?” YN has to tease him a bit because of how he did the same to her earlier in the night.

Harry looks embarassed, “I wasn’t trying to -. If you don’t wan-“

“I’m just fucking with you. A little payback for earlier,” YN chuckles but Harry nips at her jaw meanly which makes her squeak, “Of course, I want that with you.”

“I promise I’ll be so good to you in every way,” Harry tells her sincerely as he washes the soapy residue from her body, “All make sure you’re taken care of. You can look forward much more sex in the future.”

❤️nine years later ❤️

“M’heart, what are you doin-“ Harry tries to question but he’s cut off by a harsh kiss as he’s being pushed backwards into a empty bathroom of a fancy museum where an event was being held in his honor.

YN’s breaks the kiss for only a moment to lock the door before her hands are going to his belt to start quickly undoing it as her lips nip and sucks at his jaw, leaving lipstick prints in their wake.

“What’s gotten into you?” Harry hums as he helps her unbutton his trousers, he was hard from the moment he realized he was being dragged into the loo for a quickie and so when she untucks his dress shirt his pants, he‘s plump and ready for her.

“The speech,” Is all YN utters before she has his briefs down to mid-thigh and she’s kneeling down in front of him, carefully in her designer dress to grip him firmly at the base and not hesitate to take him all the way down which she’s adores the surprised moan that comes from his chest without his permission.

The speech.

Harry had just been honored for the fifth year in the row with The United Kingdom’s Humanitarian of the Year Award because he had donated upwards a billion dollars to different charities and organizations, as well as having three successful charities of his own - one being in honor of Willow and her adoption.

He had gotten up on stage and began with the basic speech of what it means to donate and support causes all over the world, how the success of his business had led him to be this charitable, and how he encourages other billionaires to follow in his footsteps.

Then Harry went on to get a bit emotional when he thanks his wife and all three of his babies for making him a more charitable person, how he wouldn’t be anywhere without the love and support of YN, what a wonderful wife and mother she is, and how much he loves his three daughters.

Seeing Harry be such an amazing husband and father never failed to get YN wet for him.

It never went away after the first time that they shared a bed, that craving for Harry that made her stomach begin to churn with fiery arousal and lust for him.

She never failed to have her clenching her thighs together when Harry teased her, even just the little bit, and yes, it’s because they’re still wildly attracted to each other.

But she also thinks that it’s because they are so fucking in love with each other and she swears her undying love for him grows more everyday even if she thought that she couldn’t love him more.

And she knows Harry feels the same way.

From their first time, Harry’s promise had always stood, he never ever faltered to take care of her ever - he was always by her side during the good and bad times, he loved her so deeply that it couldn’t be put in to words.

Harry always made her feel like enough, she never worried about leggy models or not fitting the image that most expected because Harry never gave her a moment to doubt it.

After nine years, he was still trying to get in her pants anytime she would let him - he could be dominant and assertive which turned her on to no end but she also fucking loved it when he was pliant and let her boss him around.

“The speech, huh?” Harry repeats but he nearly chokes on the last syllable when her nose brushes into the hair of his pubic bone before she’s pulling back to take a deep breath, “Darling, your mouth is so pretty around my cock.”

YN is truly Harry’s match. Harry loves to tease. It never stopped after the first date, he loved to build anticipation by edging, and YN realized it was just as much fun to return the favor.

They really don’t have time for it right now because Harry’s the man of the night and all eyes are on him but right now, he’s nowhere to be found after his thank you speech.

She’s has a firm grip on his base as she suckles at tip, doe eyes blinking up at him as she seems in no rush to move things along, pulling back to run her tongue on the underside of him.

“Sweetheart, we don’t have time for this,” Harry warns but he’s struggling to keep his eyes open because even just the small kitten licks feel like heaven and just to keep him on his toes, she’s occasionally taking him all the way down, “Can drool over my cock when we get home. We have the house to ourselves tonight.”

And when YN ignores him, Harry knows what she wants, and it makes a sharp thrill pump through his veins, he reaches down and knots his hand in her hair and tugs, “I said enough. Are you that cock hungry?”

YN begins to pick up her pace which is a telltale sign that the dirty talk is working, and that she doesn’t want him to stop, so he doesn’t, adding in that same raspy tone, “You are so fuckin’ spoiled. Can’t stand anyone else given me attention, got to pull me into a bathroom and get me to fuck you.”

“I didn’t say anything about you fucking me,” YN bites back because now she’s in full brat mode but she’s still standing back up when Harry gives her hair another tug.

“No? So if I put my hand under your dress you won’t be dripping down your thighs?” Harry coos but his hand is already hiking up the skirt of her dress and the moment his fingers brush over the front of her mound, he can feel how damp she is, “S’cute that after all this time you get soaked for me like the first time I fucked you.”

YN mewls when he tugs her panties to the side to tuck two fingers up, Harry’s trying to get her to beg, he loved turning the tables when she came in bossy but left a crybaby.

He pets right at her spot and he can feel her tense, a telltale sign that she was going to come soon, and so he pulls out his fingers to suck them in between his own lips, “I wish I had enough time to lick in to you. I guess you’ll just have to make do with my cock.”

“Come on, now please, baby,” YN grumbles as he lifts her up to put her bum on the sink counter, pushing the dress up around her hips, and pinning the underwear to the side.

“Tell me you love me and I’ll fuck you, m’heart,” Harry hums as he pumps himself, he was so ready for her, and he rests the tip right at where she’s hot for him - his hips twitched in anticipation.

“I love you so much,” YN whines but it’s sincere, leaning up to kiss him before adding, “The best husband and father of my babies I could ask for. I just want you, H. Want you all the time.”

Harry melts a little at her sweet words, the dominance in his voice fading as he pushes in, moving to cup her jaw, and he brushes his nose against hers - far too intimate for this setting.

“I couldn’t love anymore than I love you,” He whispers against her lips, “I fuckin’ live for you. Everyday I wake up and wonder what the fuck I did to deserve you. I want you now and for forever, you’re mine, the love of my life.”

And YN thinks back to when she was nervous, shaking like a leaf in front of the same man because she was so intimidated by him - she’s now married to him and has three children with, how she didn’t think she was worthy.

To know having that same man smattering kisses over her cheeks and nose to make her giggle while he cleans her up in a tiny bathroom after having a quickie that they really shouldn’t have because he’s the man of the night.

She knew she picked right.

[scoops-stevie-archive]

@outpastthebrakers posted a thing about hospital security guard eddie and er nurse steve and @zerokrox-blog sent in a prompt for a steddie med school au, but despite working in a hospital, i don't know anything about med school other than it's 4 years of schooling and 4 years of residency, so i couldn't deliver on that part unfortunately. but i hope yall enjoy regardless!

"Are you gonna actually do something tonight, or are you just gonna sit there and look handsome like always?"

Steve pushes his glasses up the bridge of his nose as he looks up from the computer and rolls his eyes.

"I could ask you the same thing, you know," he says, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms. "This is the third time you've been down here in the last," Steve checks his watch, "hour. Don't you have a parking lot to patrol or something?"

Eddie only laughs and hooks his thumbs into his belt loops. "Bold of you to assume they let me drive the car, big boy. Nah, Preston drives and I get to be the passenger princess I was born to be."

Steve snorts. He definitely doesn't pay attention to the looks the other nurses are giving them.

"Besides," Eddie continues. He leans his elbows on the counter of the nurse's station. "It's your fault I'm down here so often in the first place."

"Oh really?" Steve raises an eyebrow and doesn't hide the fact that he's checking out the tattoos on Eddie's forearms that are showcased by the short sleeves of his uniform shirt framing his biceps. Hospital uniform policy says minimal jewelry but Eddie's never been one for conformity so his fingers are adorned with rings of different size.

(Hospital policy also says that security staff are, under no circumstances, to physically harm violent patients or visitors, but that policy doesn't say anything about Eddie threatening to dole out a knuckle sandwich or two.)

Eddie tracks Steve's gaze and smirks. He taps his fingers on the counter in a rolling rhythm, his black nail polish accenting the flashiness of his rings.

Eddie leans in a little more (which isn't necessary because the counter is a foot above the desk Steve is sitting at) and almost purrs, public decency be damned, "Because, princess, if it weren't for you, I'd be stuck up in my office doing something boring, like reading." He places a hand on his chest. "As much as I love my dragon hoard of books, seeing your pretty face for twelve hours is a much better option."

Steve blushes and tries to sputter out a response, but the radio clipped to Eddie's shoulder goes off.

Eddie confirms the call and groans, dropping his head.

The moment is all Steve needs to compose himself. "Oh no," he frowns, insincere but his tone teasing. "You have to actually do your job. How awful."

Eddie mouths wordlessly back at him, mocking, but then grins and raps his knuckles on the counter once more, giving him a wink. "Don't miss me too much, sweetheart."

Steve tries to not watch as Eddie walks down the hallway, but god those pants fit him so well. He's always had a thing for tiny, perky asses.

"Steve."

Steve jumps and does not yelp like a child. He turns to see his colleague Jen. Jen's been working in the ER for a few years and is a spitfire with a heart of gold.

"You've been flirting with him for months and neither of you have made a real move on each other. What the hell? The betting pool Trent and Brett have is getting shallow."

The tips of Steve's ears start to burn. "Betting pool?!" He turns his chair around to the guys mentioned and they're very much making an effort not to look at him. "You guys are betting on us hooking up? How old are you, twelve?"

"Stevie," Jen sighs in a dramatic way that reminds Steve of Robin and it makes his heart clench. "You have turned down every single person in the vicinity since you started. Eddie is obviously into you and you're into him. I'm going to say this as nicely as I can because you're my favorite out of all the graduates: Please jump this man's bones so I can get my $50."

"My love life is only worth $50 to you?"

"Steve."

Steve groans and hits his head on the desk.

xxxxxxxx

Eddie outright moans when 7am rolls around and he's finally able to take off his uniform. He shoves the bulletproof vest and his holster belt into his locker and his shirt and pants into his dufflebag to be washed later.

God, he doesn't even want to think about laundry.

After he got the call that pulled him away from Steve, it was like the floodgates opened. Two code violets, one report of a car circling the ASU parking lot suspiciously, and three code browns that ended up being patients sneaking outside for a smoke.

He didn't blame them. With the night he had, he's regretting his decision to quit.

Eddie walks through the automatic doors at the entrance of the hospital after he's changed back into his civvies, and those regrets immediately disappear and his mood brightens when he sees who's waiting for him.

Wayne's van is parked in the drop off zone and the sliding door is opened. A bright grin stretches across Eddie's tired face as he gets closer to his little girl, happily squirming in her car seat and drinking juice out of her bottle.

"Da-dee!"

Eddie lets his bag slide off his shoulder and onto the ground but Wayne picks it up and puts it next to Emma's diaper bag.

"Hi, baby!" Eddie coos as he unbuckles her. "Good morning!" He kisses her cheek and buries his nose in her hair, a chesnut brown like her dad's, and cuddles her close. "I missed you so much. Did you have fun with papaw last night?"

"She fussed a little after you left but I got her settled," Wayne says. He holds up a McDonald's bag. "Decided she was gonna get an early start this morning so I figured yall could use some breakfast."

Eddie's stomach chooses the right time to growl and his mouth waters. Last he ate was a TV dinner around one in the morning. Eddie tells Wayne to pick a spot in the visitor's parking lot and then takes Emma back inside the hospital with him.

He doesn't see Steve when he gets to the ER.

"Hey, Steve hasn't left yet, has he?"

A nurse, Jen, Eddie thinks her name is, looks at him and immediately starts cooing at the (admittedly adorable) baby in his arms that's looking around with curious eyes and drinking her juice.

"Steve's in the locker room getting changed, he's just about to clock out. Who is this little cutie?"

Eddie grins and bounces Emma lightly. "This is Emma, my little monster. She gets all her cuteness from her other dad."

Jen's face falls for a second but before Eddie can ask what's wrong, Emma squeals way too loudly for a hospital at 7:30 in the morning and almost throws her bottle in her excitement.

"Da! Da!"

Steve looks just about as tired as Eddie feels and he can practically hear their bed calling their names. But Steve's eyes light up when he hears who's calling for him and a sort of puppy-like grin takes over his face, dopey and happy.

Emma is already reaching for him and Steve quickly strides over and takes her in his arms.

"Good morning, lovebug," Steve says, enveloping her in the gentlest hug he can muster. He breathes in her natural baby smell and closes his eyes.

Eddie's hand goes to his waist to keep him awake and Steve hums, opening his eyes and leaning into give Eddie a peck on the cheek.

"Morning, baby," he murmurs, all traces of teasing and flirting from the night before gone and replaced with open affection.

Steve doesn’t need to look at Jen to know her jaw is probably on the floor.

Eddie returns the kiss on Steve's lips. "Morning, sweetheart. Wayne’s waiting with breakfast outside. Seems like little miss princess here decided she was gonna wake up early, early today." He tickles Emma's tummy as he says this, causing her to laugh around her binky and try to push his fingers away.

"Food sounds so good right now," Steve practically whines.

Jen is still staring between the three of them. Steve smiles sheepishly.

"Sorry you didn't win your money. I should’ve told you, Eddie and I have been together for years. Emma's our daughter." He shifts Emma in his arms and gives everyone a wave. "I'll see you guys later."

He and Eddie walk out of the hospital hand in hand. They eat their breakfast in the parking lot and Wayne follows them to their house to stay up with Emma while Steve and Eddie get some much needed sleep.

When they go back into work later that evening, they fess up to everyone and Eddie gives Jen $50 right from his own wallet.

#steddie #steddie ficlet #steddie dads #cj talks #cj writes

[romanarose]

Favorites of 2023

Hi! I've seen a lot people doing these so I thought I would too!

These are all sorts of Oscar Issac/Pedro Pascal fics that delighted me this year <3

I tried to keep it to one rec per author just because I have soooooo many friends with wonderful fics and blogs who deserve recognition

If yours didn't make it, NO FEAR you are still wonderful to me &lt;3

Everything is labeled properly in the fic so be warned, many of this contains dark!

3 series that I couldn't stop thinking about

Hungry Hearts By @atinylittlepain: The Last of Us, A Bruce Springsteen themed Joel series? SHEEEEEEEESH

Yearling by @justagalwhowrites : The Last of Us, Jackson!Joel and a victim of prolonged sexual assault. If you know me, you know I love a traumatized reader healing with the power of love and friendship

The Fractured Moon by @melodygatesauthor : Moon Knight, NON CON, dark moon boys is always a slay but the way Marc is so tortured and Steven is so needy?!?!?!?! Mels characterization of Steven may or may not have influenced my Ben in ROF

Three fics that rewired my brain

On the Waterfront by @beefrobeefcal : Triple Frontier, Now, I've always loved a tubby man with a belly (who else had a crush on Samwise Gamgee in LOTR?) BUT DARK FRANKIE?!?!?!?! Turned it into a full obsession.

I can be your pretty girl by @walkintotheriveranddisappear : The Last of Us, Wow, I devoured every single chapter!!! I thinka bout it so much, ESPECIALLY that scene with Tommy... I've never looked at a pool ball the same way.

Dancing With Wolves by @hon3yboy : Moon Knight, Now, I'm not the biggest monster fucker out there, but this?!?!?!?! WEREWOLF MARC SPECTOR??? Unwell about it.

3 times men jerking off was hot

Caught by @toxicanonymity : The Last of Us, I've mentioned in the authors note for Keep Cry'n that this fic inspired it, it's one I go back to allllll the time

Take Care of me Tonight by @missdictatorme : Moon Knight, Jake is horny and lonely and jerks of..... reader helps, and makes our boy feel special <3

Pent Up by @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin : Narcos, Javi is... well... pent up, needs to let loose! and boy does he.

4 times it got gay bc something is wrong with me and I couldn't decide

Behind Enemy Lines by @astroboots : Triple Frontier, Y'all know how much I love this series, seeing as I wrote a fic for it XD but this chapter is something i always hold close <3

Captain of the team by @writefightandflightclub : Triple Frontier, MAAAAAANNNNN this fic is why I will never be the same as a person.

Trine by @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction : Sucker Punch. Anyone who reader blue jones should be reading this. Incredible.

What if he never had to go? by @velocibeewords : Triple Frontier, The infamous series I read on my friend bachelorette weekend! So good I couldn't put it down, going so far as to read it at a casino XD Benny and Santi, my babies

3 times underused characters shined

Oxford Comma by @whatthefishh : The Two Faces of January, Tell me, how does someone take a character with almost no following and make a series so damn beloved by many??? Only Mona could.

My Ex's Tapes by @runa-falls : Lighteningface, Basil Stilt AND Jake Lockley??!?! God bless this mess hnnggggg

I'm Getting What's Mine by @winniethewife : The Card Counter, dub con, I think we as a society need more William Tell, and sensory deprivation to break down reader? Amazing.

3 times they talked dirty to me *trumpet noises*

Not a Survivalist Girl by @tightjeansjavi and @chaotic-mystery : The Last of Us, when they finally fuck??? HELLO?!?!! unreal

Only Daddy That'll Walk the Line by @millerscoffee : The Last of Us, Joel is so degrading and condescending in this I think about it so much it's fucking unreal.

Making Trouble by @juneknight : Moon Knight, The fic that completly fried the brains of the moon knight fandom. "You cried like I was killing you—except you were begging me not to stop" yeah. Yeah...

3 times there were three or more

The story of us by @pimosworld : Triple Frontier, This series has a special place in heart bc Priscilla said I influenced a lo of it with the characterizations and thats such a big honor. Priscilla Is so talented and I adore how she writes these guys... and the FishBen wins my heart

Eyes on Me by @cavillscurls : The Last of Us, Soft Joel? Tommy watches? AFTERCARE?!?!?! Y'all know how much I love aftercare.... I should read this again shouldn't I?

Run the Table by @katiexpunk : The Last of Us, MORE TOMMY JOEL THREESOME! MORE!!!! This one came out recently so its still fresh in my mind

3 Times I should NOT have been into that

No Soul to Sell @atticrissfinch : The Last of Us, NON CON V DARK, this is the fic that made me like... yeah I'm into piss. No doubt. It was so dark and hot ;-;

Plushies Series by @pedge-page The Last of Us, Haru knows how much I love this, and it was a toss up between this and their piss kink but seeing as I got that above.... plushes needs more love bc its so soft and domestic and horny <3

Plaything by @missannwinchester : The Last of Us, wow, I adored this fic… then I lost it!!!! Thank you to everyone who helped find it bc it’s one of my favs. I wanna be Joel’s lil doll he dresses up 🥺

3 times I said “this is underrated af”

No One But Me by @koshkamartell : The Last of Us, Are y'all tired of me talking about this fic yet? Koshka told me my series The Wrong Way inspired this so it's special to my heart <3

Safe by @criticallyacclaimedstranger and @apascalrascal : Triple Frontier, Cal has so many good Frankie one shots it was hard to pick, but this one is sooooo soft. We love Frankie being willing to listen and learn.

Through the Scope by @ssuperficialspacecadett : Triple Frontier, Y'all know I love a traumatized reader learning to heal, but his fic is fantastic bc it's a traumatized reader who has done a lot of the work already and is strong and brave as it is <3 Also, all 4 of the guys are her friends now which is the best way to have a fic

Thank you all soooooo much for all these amazing fics and for a great 2023! Well. Not so great, I had terrible time lol but y'all were my solace <3

If you feel so inclined, check out my best of year wrapped for both RomanaRose and Romana-after-dark

I'm not gonna say 2024 is my year, I leanred my lesson XD I am approaching 2024 with RESPECT. It will be the year it is.

#romana recs #joel miller #joel miller x reader #the last of us fanfiction #triple frontier #santiago garcia #santiago garcia x reader #benjamin miller #moon knight #marc spector #marc spector x reader #jake lockley #jake lockley x reader #steven grant #steven grant x reader #rydall keener #rydall keener x reader #blue jones #blue jones x reader #Francisco morales #francisco morales x reader #frankie morales #frankie morales x reader #william miller #william miller x reader #benjamin miller x reader #william tell #william tell x reade #the card counter #javier pena

[mylovelies-docx]

Sorry, I Love You - Part 5

Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood afternoon, everyone.

:) Have fun

Plot: You and Bucky have a good thing going - best of friends that also have more than a little chemistry between the sheets. Everything is fine until you develop feelings for the man who doesn't want a relationship. What will happen when Bucky finds out?

C/W: Awkwardness, flashbacks, feels

Word Count: 1,950

Tag List: NOW CLOSED! If you'd like to keep up with this story, please follow my blog and turn on notifications! ❤️ you :)

[Prologue][Part 1][Part 2][Part 3][Part 4]

This wouldn't be your and Bucky's first undercover mission together, but it would be the first one where the tension between you is decidedly not sexual. You're not even sure how well the two of you can pull off this charade since you have no idea what your chemistry is like anymore. Used to, you could do anything together, be anything together.

Not so much now.

There’s an awkwardness between you. Silences pregnant with all the things left unsaid – or should have been left unsaid. You’ll catch Bucky watching you from the corner of your eyes, always with an unreadable expression like he’s trying to figure you out again without actually asking any questions.

You can't imagine that you've changed so much in the intervening months, but Bucky makes so much progress in therapy that his confidence in himself and his personality grow by leaps and bounds all the time. 

You don’t know this new Bucky, but you wish you did. You wish you had been with him to see his growth, encourage him on. 

You’ve missed out on so much of your life by staying away from the Tower. You’d had so many plans that never came to be – no walks in the park when the flowers started to bloom, no trips to the beach on the hottest days of the year, no ice skating when the first snow fell. You kept a tab on everything that should have been on the calendar in your mind, noting all the days that had significance in the past but went uncelebrated this year.

But what’s done is done, and you have to pay for your actions – half a year away is a small price to have Bucky back in your life, even as a stranger instead of your lover. 

You’re now trying to organize your new life on the outskirts of a small town in Russia, just a few miles away from a HYDRA base. Snow was falling thick and fast as the quinjet touched down hours ago, leaving behind a pristine blanket of white outside your new home. The small, two-bedroom cottage looks rustic, but it is still nicer than most of the surrounding homes due to Tony’s influence. There is hidden technology that will help the house to stay warm in this cold climate and random high-tech appliances, lights, and other things that look normal and are anything but.

With the HYDRA base going radio silent, you may be in this little home for longer than was initially expected earlier this year. Bucky is sure that the base is still active, though.  He spent a lot of time here as the Winter Soldier, but no one has received reports from the embedded spy in recent months. This inactivity is concerning since you're no longer sure what is going on inside the building anymore.  

It would be too obvious for Bucky to go undercover inside the facility, so that leaves it up to you to infiltrate as a researcher. The spy had assured last year that no one from the facility lived in the town you’ve settled in, so it’s safe enough for Bucky to remain close by as you work.

But the small town you’ve settled in is so traditional that the only way to remain inconspicuous as a younger woman is to be connected to a man in some way – be it living with family members or a husband.

And since you don't want to be labeled an outcast or worse, Bucky is here.

Bucky is going to be a mechanic at the small family-owned shop just down the road, and his prosthesis is covered in Stark technology that makes it appear as if he’d never lost it. Bucky used to spend a lot of time fixing up old cars and motorcycles between missions, so he should really enjoy spending his days in the garage helping out the Kowalds.

Unfortunately, your background isn’t as fun. You’re a whiz when it comes to biology, so Nat cooked up a false resume full of lab work that centers around eugenics and biomanipulation – things your spy had reported the facility was actively looking into. In order to get your foot in the door at the HYDRA facility, the Avengers had to create a background so disturbing that you're not even sure if you can interview for it properly.

 You're just zipping up into your thick winter coat when Bucky walks out of the kitchen drying his hands on a dish towel.

“You headin’ out now, doll?” He asks, a small worry line between his eyebrows.

“Yup,” you answer back with a comforting smile on your face. “I need to go meet with our contact to make sure that everything is still okay.”

“Just be careful, yeah?” he tells you, slinging the towel up onto his shoulder. Today is his first day at the mechanic shop, so he's dressed in blue overalls with a small name tag stitched onto his chest. The sun is just barely rising, but he's going to be late if he doesn't hurry.

"You know me, Buck. My middle name is Safe."

"Your middle name is Trouble and you can't convince me otherwise, babygirl."

You stick your tongue out at him and blow a raspberry, holding your middle finger up in the air as you turn around and head out the door. Once out of his sight, you smile and bask in the feeling of having your friend back.

You'd missed the banter and easy wit you used to share together, so this small exchange feels like a return to normal. The awkwardness might return in time, but you hope Bucky has forgiven you enough to power through.

You trek along the deserted streets. The early hour and layer of snow on the ground seems to be keeping the townsfolk within their homes, wrapped snugly under their warm blankets. You sigh heavily and watch your breath fog in the air, the mist condensing and freezing your skin as you walk through the cloud.

You pass house after house, noticing lights turning on and the sound of hairdryers, televisions, and conversations humming in the air. Everything has a vague, indistinct quality to it, lulling you into daydreams of what their lives are like. Is it simple? Do they enjoy this cold, snowy location? Or are they also dreaming of a warm day laying in the grass in nothing but a pair of shorts and a tank top?

A memory worms its way to the surface of your mind of a day spent just like that with Bucky. 

This was only a few weeks before your friends-with-benefits situation started. It was the hottest day of the year so far, the humidity heavy in the air and making the sidewalks and parks of New York City intensely uncomfortable. Even though Stark has the Tower equipped with the latest technology, he's incapable of leaving anything well enough alone. He'd been tinkering with the HVAC and somehow short-circuited the entire system. Everyone in the Tower was miserable and cranky, choosing to avoid one another in an attempt to stave off arguments and confrontations. 

You'd been sitting in the shade of the balcony, fanning yourself as you watched all the teeny tiny people on the ground maneuver the crosswalks and traffic to get to where they were going. It was no warmer outside than it was in your room, so you chose to people-watch instead of lay there and sweat miserably on your clean sheets.

Just as some bratty kid you’d been watching chucked the ice cream he’d been yelling for only moments ago onto the sidewalk, the sliding glass doors behind you whooshed open. The sound of metal knocking against the doorframe had let you know that Bucky was the one to interrupt your spying.

Regretfully turning your neck, you felt your skin sliding wet and hot against itself. A frown marred your features as you stared at Bucky as he stood behind you, his eyes alight with mischievous glee.

“What did you do…?” You question slowly, almost afraid to know what that look was all about.

He shrugged a shoulder and smirked. “Nothing too bad.”

“BARNES!!!” a voice roared from the depths of the Tower.

You quirked an eyebrow at him and a small, disbelieving smile graced your lips. “That doesn’t sound like nothing, Buck.”

Bucky hmm’d and glanced back into the building when a CRASH reverberated from where the voice had yelled moments ago. “I was going to get out of here for a while. You wanna come?” he questioned breezily.

“And why would I want to leave when Tony’s working on fixing the AC?” you replied as you continued to fan yourself. Bucky’s eyebrows had quirked ever so slightly.

“Y/L/N!!!” 

Your hand had frozen mid-fan and your eyes widened so much that Bucky couldn’t help but laugh.

“Where’d you say we were going?” you asked as you rose quickly from your seat and bypassed Bucky at the door.

***

“You little shit!” You had laughed uproariously when Bucky finally admitted to the prank.

“What else was I gonna do?” he responded, turning his face to look at you.

Even with the intense heat that day, you and Bucky had decided to forgo the climate controlled vehicles in the garage and went instead with the fastest getaway vehicle – Bucky’s bike. The wind had whipped against your body when you held onto Bucky and watched the city fall into the distance behind you. 

He apparently hadn’t had a destination in mind, so you had ridden until cities and towns disappeared. He’d pulled off beside a barely visible hiking trail and jumped off his bike. You had followed suit and watched as Bucky pulled a blanket from inside the storage compartment on the bike. You hiked your eyebrows questioningly, but only got a grin in response. 

That’s how you had found yourself lounging on a blanket in the middle of a field with Bucky on the hottest day of the year. You’d chatted and laughed for hours until the sun had slowly faded from the sky. Out that far, the light pollution of the cities couldn’t touch the stars. You had gazed upwards, trying to draw the constellations as you remembered them.

You weren’t any good at astrology or astronomy, but the stories behind the figures in the sky captivated you nonetheless.

You laughed again and turned to face him as well. “And why’d you have to implicate me, huh?” 

“Figured it’d be more fun that way,” he had answered slyly. 

You had wound your arm up and smacked him on the stomach, your hand bouncing off of the toned muscles. He’d caught your wrist on the next swing and held it up and away from his body. You’d tried to tug it away, but his metal fingers held fast and didn’t let you go. You rolled over toward him and began trying to use your body as leverage, but you had only succeeded in pulling yourself closer to him.

You huffed and blew the piece of hair that had fallen over your eyes away and looked up at him. He’d had a look in his eyes that he hadn’t directed at you before, but you’d seen glimpses of it when he’d find someone to bring back for the night.

You can’t help but think that that moment had been the turning point in your friendship with Bucky, the moment he thought about asking you to be friends-with-benefits. Of course you’d found him handsome long before then, but that was a moment that really cemented your attraction to him. 

You didn’t have romantic feelings at the time, but you should have known they were inevitable.

Part 6

@jackiehollanderr @rabbitrabbit12321 @12345sebby @blackwood-bodecker-housewife @lauraashley93 @themorningsunshine @happinessinthebeing @nash-dara @calwitch@stany0url0calwh0res111 @pono-pura-vida @learisa @introverbatim @kentokaze @marvelogic @kaz11283

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky fanfic #Sorry I Love You

[jinchuls-moved]

𝙴𝚗𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑 ˚‧⁺ ･ ˖ ·

╰┈➤ miya atsumu x reader

୨ about ୧ showing up at your house was the last thing you expected him to do; showing up when your husband was home made it far far worse

୨ content ୧ cheating (reader on their husband), angst

୨ notes ୧ i wrote something similar like a year ago on my first blog n wanted to rewrite <33

divider by @/cafekitsune

“Is yer husband home?”

He asks the question before you’d even had the chance to greet him, let alone acknowledge it’s was even him at the door—the man you’d all but ghosted 2 weeks beforehand.

“Atsumu.” Your hushed voice gives him his answer as you slide outside with him, shutting the door behind you. “Why are you here?”

“Why am I here?” He scoffs, “Why have you been ignorin’ me?” Folding his arms across his chest he raises an eyebrow when you start to shush him. “What?” He scoffs again, apparently his favourite sound to accompany the look in his eyes you’re not used to seeing—something you’d never thought would be targeted at you. “Scared he’ll find out?”

“There’s nothing for him to find out.” You hiss, glancing to your front window you pray your husband’s curiosity doesn’t get the better of him tonight—the last thing you want is for your mistake, no matter how big it was, to ruin what you’d begun to fight for; to fix.

“Nothin’.” He repeats with yet another scoff, as though you’d said the most unbelievable thing—to him, maybe it was. “4 months of nothin’. Frequent excuses for nothin’. Nights in my bed, comin’ to my matches and telling me yer marriage was on the ropes. Nothin’.” You’d never heard Atsumu so angry, so hurt.

Your stomach drops and the guilt finds its home, a feeling you’d become more than accustomed to at the sight of your husband. But not ‘Tsumu.

“Atsumu-” Your voice and face soften, and he falters at the sound of his name. Is he allowed to be angry at you, when he knew you were a married woman?

He should have listened when Sakusa warned him you were a bad idea.

“No, no.” He stops you, a hand in the air and a sigh escaping his lips. He might not have the right, but he was angry. At you. “Ya can’t just bat yer eyes and speak nice t’me and expect me to fall at yer feet again.”

“I’m not trying anything ‘Tsumu.” The nickname falls from you as though you hadn’t practically broken his heart. “I don’t want you ‘falling at my feet’ again.” Mocking his choice of words your eyebrows furrowed and what little of you still wanted him around disappeared—since when did he act like this? Even if he was frustrated, he had no right. “This was my decision and I’m sorry if it’s not what you wanted. But he is my husband. I’ve messed up but i’m not willing to make it worse because you want a quick fuck and a free therapy session.”

“That’s not—” his animosity disappears but you don’t care enough to listen to his excuses.

“I don’t care, Atsumu.” Lifting a hand to stop him, you sigh. “Don’t come here again, don’t call, don’t text.” You begin to open your door again, stepping into the entranceway of your home, your voice is as quiet as when you’d started. “If I could turn back time, I’d never have let this happen.”

“Who was it, Love?” He hears the voice of your husband as the door begins to slowly close. Atsumu waits, yearning for your attention; hoping you’ll admit to the secret tryst and tell the man you married he just wasn’t what you needed but that Atsumu was, regardless of anything you’d told him.

But, of course, it never came. The door closed just as he heard your reply: “No one, Hon.” Surely ready to tell him one last white lie—that he was a salesman with a product you had no interest in or a nosy neighbour ready to accuse you of something your husband would never believe.

It’s that moment where Atsumu realises the things he was most scared of was coming true. All the nights he’s spent beside you in bed, spilling his deepest secrets and listening to every worry you had. All the times he’d barely held himself back from telling you just how in love with you he was and begging for you to leave your husband and run away with him—all those intense, aching feelings were his. Not yours.

#𝓈𝒾𝑔𝓃𝑒𝒹 𝑒𝒸𝒽𝑜 ༉‧₊˚. #atsumu x reader #miya atsumu x reader #atsumu angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu angst #hq x reader #hq angst

[nerdieforpedro]

Filthy Hooligans

Lucian Flores x female reader

This fanfiction and my entire blog is 18+ MDNI

Main Masterlist / Lucian Flores Masterlist

Word Count: 1.6k

Summary: Showing up at Lucian's place at 3 am only means one thing. You both know it.

Warnings: Reader (nickname is cupcake) and Lucian are filthy, moisture, smoking, teasing, reference to public sex, exhibitionist behavior, fingering, 2 ass slaps (I think), unprotected P in V (wrap it people!), finger sucking

Notes: I came home from work last night. Fully intended to work on like 4 other WIPs I have. Fell asleep in my chair after eating something in my scrubs, woke up at 3 am. Wrote this, sent it to @musings-of-a-rose to read to over. And here were are. I hope I got the scuzz right. 👀

“I didn’t realize you were full of such bullshit Flores.”

“You’re not going to take that tone with me. I’m telling you not to come here anymore.”

“Is that why you opened the door for me, because I shouldn’t come here anymore?”

It’s your damn mouth. You always have something to say, you can never just accept an answer. Always questioning, always saying something. He needs you to understand that he isn’t saying this because he wants to. Any man in their right mind would enjoy a visit from you at 3 a.m. in nothing but a crimson silk nightgown, black kitten heels and that long black peacoat he remembered buying for you even though you said it was too much. Things are a little too heated right now, he needs to lay low and not have people coming to and from except family, which you care clearly not. Everything about you is loud, which he enjoys. Immensely, finds it entertaining, but not now. 

“I opened the door because I can’t have you causing a scene in my building. I don’t need this shit right now.” Flores is barefoot and pacing. The door man knows you downstairs, he’s one of his people who knows you visit usually at night several times a week. He shouldn’t have let you in, Lucian doesn't remember off hand if he told him or not. He needs to follow up on that later. 

He always has a slight sheen to him, no matter if it’s cold or warm or he’s actually inside. Hair lightly damp around the edges but still curly on top. His small soft belly jiggles over the top of his gray sweatpants he normally sleeps in. A hand at his temple, massaging it, while his other one holds his cigarette, half ash and falling onto the floor. He’s aware that this isn’t his usual calm, collected and suave self. 

“Seems like you need my mouth after all Lucian.” You’re starting your game. Calling his name like that, kicking off your heels, running your cool hands across his heated back. It feels too good. He stops pacing for a moment. “Lu, please. I’ll take care of you and then go.” The idea floats in his mind. To let you do it, have that hot moist mouth of yours, he can lay his head against the back of his couch and not worry about anything while you work. Kissing, sucking, licking, smearing, worshiping at the altar he has between his legs. “Lu-cian~ Lu baby…” Your voice is deepening raspy, lips on the back of his neck, fingers tracing the gold chain that has become his signature over the years. Once he feels your tongue where his hairline starts, he turns to grab your wrists, not too hard, but so you’ll stop. 

“You damn siren! Just fucking listen. You. Need. To. Go. Do not come back until I call for you. I mean it cupcake.” Releasing you he curses. This is not what he needs right not, to be worrying about you. Flores needs to be focused on a plan to get out of the mess, find where the leak is. One of the boys messed up, he needed to know which one. He expects to hear you storm out, welcomes it because then he can focus. 

“Lucy~” Dammit, he hates when you call him that. It pisses him off, you know it does. He can’t engage. He’ll fall for the trick you’re trying to pull on him. Sticking his cigarette in the ashtray on the coffee table, he goes over to his kitchen and gets a drink of water, gulping it down. Trickles of it slide down his neck, he knows it’s hitting the vein you like to nibble and suck on when you ride him. He’s been half-swollen since you banged on his door. He knew what you came here for, the same thing you’d been coming for the last three months. Lucian doesn’t expect your next move though, to have your silk, up around your waist, you on your knees facing the back of the couch and opening yourself for him. “Lucian, fill me once. Once and I’ll go.” His hands hold tight onto the sides of his marble kitchen island. Watching you. You’re just as bad as he is. 

The two of you have been like this since the Burger King parking lot in your car. You’d pulled him in, got on top of him, rode him, told him you liked his gold chain and used a marker you found in your glove box to write your number on his arm. Well you tried to, he was too sweaty once you two finished so that was a good laugh. There was a speed warning ticket that you tore in half and you both exchanged numbers. You were sure your phone was somewhere in your car. He was going to meet his guys to check in and see how collections were going, you said you were going to pick your mother up and take her to the grocery store. Filth to match his grime. Different locations, indoors and outdoors. At times, ripped and stained clothing was all you two parted with. His sweat on your body, lipstick on his chest and neck. Sometimes he wouldn’t wipe it off before he went to his next stop, showing off what he’d been up to.

Flores took his time in walking over to you, watching you wiggle your ass for him. When he was behind you, he spread your thighs wider and inserted two fingers in your dripping cunt, curling them to have you call his name louder. “They slid right the hell in didn’t they? Only been two days since I was last in this pussy. You already want it filled again, don’t you cupcake?” You look over your shoulder and whine, he uses his free hands to swat your ass. 

“Hell yes Lucian. I want to leave dripping again.” You grind on his fingers, making him start to pump into you slowly. “Give me your thick cock and stain me again.” A single kiss to the back of your neck is all that Lucian gives you before removing his fingers and replacing them with his cock. He feels you spread, groaning from finally having what you want. His hands take hold of your hips but doesn’t move yet.

“I mean it cupcake. You don’t show up here again without me calling you.” He feels you pushing your hips back and he pinches your hips making you yelp. “Do. You. Understand. Me?” His grip starts to loosen and you feel him pulling out of you.

“Yes! Yes Lucian I understand. Damn. I won’t be here unless you call.” Said almost too quickly to understand, Flores chuckles before making his hips flush with yours, bottoming out within you.

“You’ll only listen with my cock inside of you, it figures, cupcake.” The growl Lucian releases as his pace quickens, has your thighs dripping with your slick and his pre-cum. You’re slumped over the back of the couch, writhing your hips in tune with his. Flores has an idea and takes your elbows in his hands instead of your hips, pounding that much harder into you. 

“I’ll listen to whatever you say with this cock of your Lucian,” Your head hands toward your chest, your moans are turning into squeals. He muttered soft curses in between his grunts, releasing one of your arms, placing his hand on your chest, then sliding it up to your neck. 

“Will you now? My dirty cupcake, suck my fingers. Maybe I jerked off before you got here.” He commanded. His palm was now on your chin as he inserted three fingers in your mouth, pressing down on your tongue. He felt your walls starting to quiver and knew with his throbs he wasn’t too far off either. With several haphazard thrusts, Lucian gave you your filling as requested. It warmed you from the inside, churned inside of you. The loss was felt when he pulled out this time, removing his fingers from your mouth and pulling his sweatpants back up. He saw you close your legs and stagger when standing up, he debated helping you, assisting you with your shoes, but not your coat. Before you closed it, trickles of his come were visible on your thighs. He smirked. 

You wobbled a bit but found your footing on the way to the door. “Don’t wait too long to call Flores. I may have to get some other filling if you’re going to holed up here.” The way you smiled told him that you actually would seek out a replacement for him. The corners of his mouth turned downward.

“You see if they’ll make you wobble like that. I doubt they will cupcake. You’ll be missing this dick. If you don’t answer, there’s plenty of pussy out here.” Lucian took his pack out of his pocket and lighter, firing up another cigarette. The small flame glowed against the visible sheen of his skin and his gold chain that you’ve never seen him without. His lips around the stick making a small ‘o’ as he inhaled, holding it in before his released the smoke from his nostrils, tilting his chin up.

“I’ll probably have to try a few before I find another good fit. And I don’t know what other woman you’d be able to find that can get wet enough to handle you. See you Lu~” He watched you walk out the door and down the hallway to the elevator. You blew him a kiss and he nodded before stepping back into his apartment and plopping down on the couch. He took a long drag of his cigarette and sighed, exhaling the smoke again. He’d need to figure out the leak sooner rather than later, he’s not willing to have blue balls over this shit.

The beads of sweat on Lucian's neck 💦: @laurfilijames @avastrasposts @maggiemayhemnj @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @morallyinept @trulybetty @goodwithcheese @secretelephanttattoo @rhoorl @linzels-blog @yorksgirl @for-a-longlongtime @legendary-pink-dot @magpiepills @alltheglitterandtheroar @beefrobeefcal @pamasaur @angelofsmalldeath-codeine @theywhowriteandknowthings @gasolinerainbowpuddles @megamindsecretlair @daddy-dins-girl @readingiskeepingmegoing @guelyury @missladym1981 @heareball @sin-djarin @gwendibleywrites @katw474 @immarocketman @ramblers-lets-get-ramblin

#pedro pascal characters #fanfiction #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal #Lucian Flores #the uninvited #Lucian Flores smut #A Nerdie fic #cupcakes need to filled #when they would like #as one does

[f10werfae]

Chris Evans Dad Scenarios #5

pairing: Dad!Chris Evans x Mom!Reader

summary: EVEN MORE adventures of Chris taking on one of his best roles yet, a father

Chapters 1, 2, 3, 4

- Requests are open!

Likes, Comments and Re-blogs are appreciated♥️

Chris Evans Masterlist🌟

Full Masterlist ✨

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︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

Dad!Chris Gets hella jealous at the game

(Y/n's P.O.V)

The loving cool spring air was refreshing especially while watching my 5 (and 3/4, it counts) year old run after the ball with all his might, his tiny legs carrying him from one end of the pitch to the other. Leo was definitely a little ball of joy, his excited laughs and shouts being 'awed' by the other moms on the team. All of us standing per usual at the fence closest to the pitch, cameras out constantly at the ready.

The dads had made it their thing to bring camping chairs and just sit back a bit behind us. Usually bringing juice boxes or bottles of water to the game, with the occasional barbecue going on. I sighed feeling a slight kick to my stomach, baby girl always gets active when we’re at football, almost as if she’s here to support her big brother. I rubbed over the soft cotton fabric of my white maternity dress, thumps following my hands wherever they went.

“Ya alright Y/n, you look like you’re boutta pop” Janice commented looking at me with a smile on her face, she had become one of my closest friends ever since our sons started playing for the same soccer team.

“I know right? But i’m only 8 months along, so 1 more to go, hopefully she doesn’t come too early”

(Chris' P.O.V)

Sitting in my camping chair I couldn’t help admire my wife standing a few metres in front of me, her hair flowing freely, her face glowing and her hand cupping the bottom of her bump. God she just looks ethereal right now.

She turned her head back round to me, only for me to send her a wink causing her face to go all red and blushy.

“Hey Chris man, not to burst your bubble or anythin' but that guy from the other team keeps eyein' up Y/n”

Anthony whispered, his head indirectly nodding towards a random dad from the opposing team. His eyes very obviously trained onto my wife, his buddies slapping his back laughing as they waved their hands to imitate slapping someones ass.

“The fahk?” I whispered, Y/n oblivious to what was going on decided to walk back towards me, with her famous penguin waddle. A gorgeous smile gracing her lips as I offered her my water bottle without a word.

Spreading my legs a bit I patted my thigh,

“C'mon babe, sit right here. Know baby bub has got you all tired out”

(Y/n's P.O.V)

Looking at my husband’s handsome ass face, how could I even say no? Sitting down onto his lap I leant back into his chest, Chris now taking off his baseball cap to put it onto my head, the smell of his woody cologne overtaking my senses in the best way possible.

“Leo is playin so well out there baby, he’s definitely our kid” I joked leaning my head onto Chris' shoulder, my eyes closing peacefully

(Chris’ P.O.V)

“Oh baby he’s an Evans, course he’s talented” I laughed rubbing my hand up and down her back, feeling her physically relax into my touch.

Turning over to look at the random dad from earlier, I now could see him stealing multiple glances, clearly not happy at what he was having to see. Smiling fake at him, I watched him scoff and shake his head before facing the pitch again. Damn I knew my wife was beautiful but I did not sign up for this.

“What a bastard”

“What was that Chrissy?”

“Nothin babe, you just relax yeah?”

A few seconds later the referee blew her whistle signifying the end of the match, all the kids screaming and rushing to their parents. I watched out for Leo, his vibrant red soccer uniform coming closer towards us. His wild tufts of hair and big eyes became more visible, his toothy smile brightening up everything else around him

“DADDY DID YA SEE ME KICK THE BALL” He said excitedly, his arms waving about the place trying to show the way he kicked the ball about.

“Ya kiddin? Of course I did. You scored the first goal like the Evans you are” I said scoffing at his statement, feeling Y/n shift slightly in my arms, a small smile on her face as she ruffled Leo's hair and brought him into her arms between my legs. All of us now embracing lazily in this camp chair.

- Chris' little girl is growing up

(Y/n's P.O.V)

“Dada I wanna mawry Peter pan” I heard my daughter Eleanore swoon, her eyes glued to the T.V as the red headed cartoon flew about on the screen. Her giggles making me smile as she cuddled into Chris' chest, his lips pursing as he looked on disapprovingly.

“No boyfriends till you’re 40” He said coldly, Eleanore instantly whining and jumping out of his arms, walking towards me on the other sofa, cuddling into my chest hiding her face

“Wha- hey baby, you really gonna leave daddy over here without his baby?” Chris whined jokingly, clutching his heart dramatically dying.

“Mama I can mawry Peter pan right?” She asked looking up at me with her doe eyes, gosh how could I say no to them. Nodding at her I smoothed down her crazy hair, seeing Chris shake his head laughing in the background

“See dada, mama said I can”

She replied sassily blowing a raspberry towards Chris, her face instantly falling when Chris stuck his tongue out to fake die, Eleanore clambering to get off the sofa and run to her daddy.

“Dada wake up, me no wanna mawry Peter anymore” She whimpered cupping his face with her small hands, Chris opening one eye “really?”

“Mhm I stay wif you and mama forever” She said latching on around his neck, Chris chuckling picking her up and turning off the T.V,

“Hey where you going with our daughter?”

“She deserves a cookie after that answer bub”

- Daddy duty calls

(Y/n's P.O.V)

“babe where’s Elliana” I heard Chris ask coming out to the back yard, where I sat with my juice and new novel. The beautiful summer sun casting down enough warmth that I was able to wear a sports bra and shorts.

“Our baby is over there” I laughed nodding to the other side of the porch where Elliana's baby mat was.

It was too warm today so all she had on was a diaper, something she took advantage of, so she was wreaking havoc everywhere she went knowing she had nothing to get dirty.

I looked over to see her using Dodger as a back rest as she leant on him, holding up her own bottle as she drank away, her other hand reaching up for Chris’

“Aww pumpkin are you relaxin with Dodger and momma?” Chris asked sweetly sitting down beside them on the soft play mat, our soft curled bundle of joy tottered away from Dodger and decided to collapse onto Chris' lap.

“Baba?” Elliana asked holding up her now empty bottle, her eyes widened naturally with a small pout on her lips.

“N' here I thought you wanted to cuddle with dada” Chris scoffed setting Elliana back down by Dodger, heading inside along with her now empty bottle. A small laugh leaving me at my daughter's antics.

“Oh baby you are so smart, got daddy wrapped round your lil finger” I cooed getting up and picking up Elliana, her arms holding onto me as I put her onto my hip.

“You wanna sit with mama?” I asked watching her nod, her attention clearly on all the birds currently singing away on the trees in our yard. Her curious eyes darting all over the place as I sat her down beside me on the swinging porch bench, her body leaning onto mine as the both of us were basically laying down.

“One baba per request” Chris sighed coming out to hand Elliana her bottle, his hands resting on his hips watching her take her first sip.

“Is that good enough for you little lady?”

“Mhm baba dada” Elliana said passing her bottle back to her daddy, Chris then scooped up the little thing and put her to lay in his arms; his hands holding up the bottle for her as she drank away. Her little hands holding onto Chris' fingers,

“She really has me wrapped around her finger doesn’t she” Chris whispered out, Elliana's eyes slowly lidding closed

“Mhm she has Dodger the same way too, she’s a clever little girl. Gets it from me of course” I laughed brushing my hand through my husband’s hair, his head leaning on my shoulder, Elliana peacefully asleep in his arms despite it only being 2pm.

- Stepdad Chris comes to the rescue

(Y/n's P.O.V)

Today was the first day of the fall fair, so as tradition our little family was going to its opening. With little 6 month James strapped to my chest, we walked around the fair filled with rides, food and kids. My 6 year old Leanne held onto my hands shyly, she was exactly like me, introverted to the core.

My husband Chris on the other hand musta been on a sugar high, buzzing about the fair like a kid at a toy store.

I met Chris a few years ago when he came into the hospital I worked at, and it just went on from there. Leanne was 2 at the time so she basically grew up around him, her biological father not being in the picture. Although I did know she struggled a bit when we decided to relocate to Boston, something Chris and I had discussed for a while.

“Ya aright baby?” I asked swinging Leanne and I's hands back and forth, slowly following Chris when he moved from stall to stall.

“Mhm i’m ok mommy” Her quiet voice said, a small smile resting on my face as she squeezed onto my hand tighter. Chris finally stopped at a darts table, a selection of ginormous toys surround and hanging on the table, Leanne's eyes sparkling at them making me giggle.

“What about this one hey?” Chris asked looking at us

“I wanna big monkey daddy” Leanne said pointing up at the huge pink fluffy gorilla hanging by the other prizes, this was one of the few times she’d ever asked Chris for anything; any other time he’d just get it for her without her even asking.

“Alright baby, daddy’s gonna get it for ya” He said handing over money to the attendant, grasping the darts tightly and hitting every single balloon perfectly, looks like his practice at home really came in handy.

“That pink gorilla please” Chris said smiling smugly, watching on as the man took it down and handed it straight to Leanne, the massive thing was practically double her size.

(2 Weeks Later)

“Babe we gotta get her back on pillows” Chris whispered as we peeked into Leanne's room, she has started to use the gorilla as a portable bed. Over the week she had also put on a captain America shirt on it, a secret between us is that this is her way of keeping Chris around even when he is away.

———

Taglist Tags (Form is up there^^): @patzammit @pandaxnienke @sairsei @madebylilly @bxdbxtxh15 @tojisbabymommy @dumb-fawkin-bitch @vrittivsanghavi @chrisevansdaughter @kimhtoo17 @itsaylayay1213 @evanstanwhore @mrspeacem1nusone @thereisa8ella @seren-a-ity

#romance #chris evans imagine #chris evans x reader #chris evans fanfiction #chris evans #chris evans oneshot

[rawritzrobin]

The Waynes: Chapter 8

Title: The Waynes

Pairing: Mobster!Jason Todd x Reader

Warnings: None!

Summary: Dick comes over for a quick chat. Jason asks a special question.

A/N: Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to everyone! Super thankful to have you all here supporting one another. The holidays can be a lonely time for some people so remember be nice to those around you and check in on those that need it. Exactly one year ago today I posted the first chapter of The Waynes. Thanks for sticking with me!

Taglist (Please let me know if you want to be added!): @msghostface @khaylin27 @thequeenofbigmacs @escapism-r-us @orighami @neobreakmyback @bubbles-incorrect-yb @hypnobanditprofessorhorse-blog @attllas @comic-cat83 @mommyneytiri @aerangi @thegreawizards @baebeepeach @slitheringss @xoxoyourdoll @portrait-ninja @sunflowertardis @anime-lover-forever-1127 @wrldwidemind @dopedreamobject @jayroytodd @vanessa-boo @ih4temy5elfs0b4d @solivagantlife @killerwendigo

Masterlist | Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7

Chapter 8: Move in with me?

Jason never slept well. Not even when he was exhausted. Especially not in his own bed.

So he was surprised when he opened his eyes, and there was some light peeking out from behind the blinds. 

He tried to sit up and reach for his phone, when something moved next to him. He quickly turned over to see you asleep next to him. He smiled as he watched you sleep for a moment. It had been a while since Jason felt this kind of peace in his life. 

But as usual, his peace never lasted as his phone started to vibrate on the nightstand. He quickly picked it up and gently got out of bed, being very careful not to wake you.

He looked back to see you were still fast asleep. He tiptoed out of the room and quietly closed the door behind him. As soon as he was far enough away from the room, he answered the phone. Without saying a word, Dick’s voice came through.

“Hey Jason. How is she?” He asked.

“She's fine. Still sleeping. Probably from the overuse of adrenaline last night.” Jason said, making his way into the kitchen.

“I know you’ll be mad. But open the door. I’m here.”

Jason groaned. Dick loved to show up unannounced. He used to show up at Jason’s door every night at the manor. The man loved annoying the crap out of him. Normally, Jason would just tell Dick to go home. But he was curious why Dick felt the need to come over today. With everything that was going on, especially with Carl, he wanted to make sure everything was okay.

Jason quickly, but quietly, made his way to the front door after giving the doorman permission to let Dick up the elevator. He waited by the door and in a few minutes, it opened, and a very well dressed Dick Grayson stood at the door. Even at 8AM, Dick was dressed to the nines. Today it was a full royal blue three piece suit. The blue really made his eyes pop brighter than usual. Dick opened his mouth to speak, but Jason shushed him immediately. Dick only had one volume: Loud.

“She's still asleep.” Jason said as quietly as he could, ushering Dick to come inside. They could talk in the kitchen where the sound didn’t travel upstairs.

They quietly made their way into Jason’s giant black kitchen. Without saying a word, Jason started to make an espresso. As soon as Dick sat down on one of the kitchen stools, he started to speak. “You really care about her, don't you?”

Jason didn’t answer at first. Instead, he turned his attention to the bar, rather than the espresso machine. He needed something stronger than just a coffee today.

“Why does it feel like everyone suddenly cares about my life now. No one cared when I dated before. Why now?” He asked, annoyed. He popped the top off of his favorite whiskey and poured a large shot. As the coffee finished dripping, he took the mug and handed it to Dick. He quickly took a sip of his own drink to brace himself for the real reason Dick was here.

Dick looked at him sadly. “We’ve always cared, Jason. It’s just… you never actually cared about any of the previous girls.” 

Jason scoffed. Dick was right, he just didn’t want to agree. His love life was non-existent. He only ever had one night stands. He couldn’t even tell you the first name of the last few girls he’s slept with. Not that he cared about any of those girls at all. Most of them didn’t even care about him either. They were there for his pleasure, that was it. This was his first real relationship of actual substance. He smiled as he remembered you were upstairs in his bed of all places. None of the other girls had even seen the inside of Charles’ car let alone stepped foot into the parking lot of his building. But his smile quickly faded as he remembered who was currently standing in his kitchen.

“We both know you’re not here to talk about my love life Dicky. Why are you really here? What does Bruce want?”

Dick sighed. His intentions were good at first. He really just wanted to make sure Y/N and Jason were okay. But halfway into his card ride here, Bruce called. 

“The gala.”

Jason rolled his eyes immediately. Any mention of a gala always annoyed him. The Wayne family lived and breathed galas. How so many of those outrageously expensive galas were planned was beyond him. He had hated them when he was a kid, and he hated them now. He was always bad at fake socialization.

“Which one is it now? He remembers what happened last time right? Does he really want another Jason Todd headline to deal with?” Jason said, quickly downing the rest of his drink and pouring himself another one.

“This ones different. Alfred is throwing it. He wants you there.” Dick handed Jason an envelope. It had the words: “Jason Todd”, written in perfect cursive on it. Jason took it, and put it on the counter.

Jason sighed. Alfred was always Jason’s weakness. He saw the man like a father more than he ever saw Bruce. He would do anything for that man.

“Is it really for Alfred?” Jason asked, looking Dick right in the eyes. He knew Dick’s trick’s. He basically had to make up a lie every time he wanted Jason to do something. But Dick was also a bad liar, especially to his family.

Dick looked him right in the eyes, and nodded. “Yes. I’m not lying this time. Swear on Barbara.”

Jason rubbed his temple in annoyance. He was telling the truth. Alfred never got involved with the Wayne Family crimes. So if it really was a gala he was throwing, it would be for a good cause.

“Fine. I’ll show up. When is it?”

“Next Friday. He asked you to bring Y/N.”

Jason’s head snapped up. “Why?”

“He really likes her J. He thinks she’s good for you.” Dick paused. “We all do.”

Jason watched him closely. There was more to this.

“Bruce thinks it's a good idea to make your relationship public. The Falcones already know about her. If you two are public it would make more sense to up security around her. After All, she is dating a Wayne.” Dick said, taking a long sip of his coffee. His eyes stayed on Jason.

Jason stared at Dick for a while. He was meaning to up security around Y/N. Especially after what happened yesterday. He never thought about how weird it would be for her to suddenly be traveling around with bodyguards all day. Dick’s next question broke him out of his thoughts.

“Sorry Jason, but I gotta ask. Have you told her yet?” 

Jason scoffed. “No. Of course not. How do you think she would react?”

Dick shrugged. “Barbara took it pretty well.”

Jason scoffed. “You’re the face of the group. The one who talks to tabloids and flirts with reporters. Of course she took it well.”

Jason poured himself another shot. He looked down at his drink and sighed.

“I’m the one who does the dirty business. I wouldn’t even know how to tell her. Hey Y/N, whenever my family needs information, I torture it out of people. Or better yet, sometimes I end up killing them. My kill count? I don't even know at this point. How do you think she would react to that?” He said sadly. 

Dick got up from his seat, and put an arm on Jason’s shoulder. “You’re not just a killer J. All the info you get from those dirtbags help us. You know that. It’s not that you enjoy doing it, you’re just very good at it. Remember that one time I tried and the guy just laughed at me?”

Jason continued to look down. “I’m a bad guy Dick. That’s what she will see when I tell her. A monster.”

Dick wasn’t sure what to say. He knew the business was rough. It wasn’t always clean and they all knew it. To the outside world, they were all criminals.

The sound of a pair of feet walking into the kitchen startled the two boys. 

“Hi Dick!” You said cheerily. “I didn’t know you were here.” Your instincts were correct. Something inside you said that you should put some clothes on before getting out of bed. And you were glad you did. You were wearing one of Jason’s extra large t-shirts and a pair of pajama tights. The shirt was like a dress on you.

Jason’s mood changed immediately. Dick could practically feel it. He smiled when Jason got up from his seat and hugged Y/N. He looked away when you went up for a kiss.

“That’s my cue to leave. I’ll be out of your hair soon lovebirds.”

You laughed and pulled away. “No! Stay as long as you want. We don’t have anything planned today.” You said with a smile.

Dick shook his head and started to make his way towards the elevator. “Nah, Barbara and I have breakfast plans. I’ll be late if I stay any longer. You don’t want to see her mad.” He said as he made his way to the elevator. You both followed him out. The elevator opened and Dick stepped in. He turned around and waved. “Nice to see you again Y/N. Lets do brunch next time!” He said as the doors closed, Dick disappearing behind them.

You turned to Jason. “Is everything okay?” You asked, inquiring about Dick’s presence.

Jason nodded as he took your hand in his. “Yeah, he just wanted to make sure you were okay.” He smiled down at you and led you back to the kitchen. You sat down at one of the stools and watched Jason start to prepare breakfast for the both of you.

Just as he finished plating up the scramble eggs, the doorbell rang.

“I'll get it. It’s just Charles.” Jason said as he made his way towards the door.

You grabbed your fork and took a bite of the eggs in front of you. You moaned in pleasure. Jason was a fantastic cook. It didn’t make sense as he had access to some of the best restaurants in the world and enough money to go to those restaurants every day. But you weren’t going to complain.

Jason got back quickly, with a small box in his hand. You watched him as he took a seat in front of you and pushed the box towards you on the table.

“For you.” He said with a small smile.

You took the box and opened it, curious at what it could be. Inside the box was a small black card. It was attached to a keychain. You looked up at Jason, confused.

“It’s a key. To this place.” He said. “ He reached out and took your hand in his. “Y/N. I’ve wanted to ask you for a while now. There was just never a good time. But after everything that happened last night, and everything that could possibly happen in the future when more people find out about us, there is no better time.”

You looked at him. Still not sure where he was going just yet.

The security is top notch here. No one can come up unless they have a key or they can be let in by security, which is staffed 24/7. We can also go buy you some stuff to redecorate. I know it screams single bachelor in here. I didn’t even do any of the decorating, it was all Alfred. But I have to admit, he knows exactly what I like. Oh and Alfred comes by every once in a while with supplies so you dont have to worry about that anymore. You can let him know the type of stuff you like and he can bring you some.

Jason went on and on about the amenities of his penthouse. You stopped him before he kept going. “Jay.” You said as you squeezed his hand. “You’re babbling.” You said with a laugh.

Jason stopped speaking, and took a deep breath. “Doll, will you move in with me?” Jason said nervously, looking down as he was afraid of your answer.

You knew the answer right away. You couldn’t believe this was happening. A big smile began to form on your face as Jason finally had the courage to look up at you.

“Are you kidding? I get to live here? I mean I would love to bring some life in here. Maybe some pictures of us or some less abstract paintings.” You said as you started to walk into the living room. “We could get a tree and put it here for christmas! I never got one because I was never able to lug it up the stairs by myself.” You said excitedly, running through the living room. Jason followed you as you began to spin in circles, trying to admire every square foot of the house. You finally stopped spinning and looked at Jason, who was laughing at your reaction.

“So I take it that's a yes?” He said.

You stopped and realized you had never given him an answer. With a few steps forward, you wrapped your arms around Jason’s neck, and tipped toed up for a kiss. Jason wrapped his arms around you. After a few seconds, you pulled away, and looked up at his large teal eyes.

“Yes Jason Todd. I will move in with you.”

Jason beamed, his face painted with the largest smile he could muster.

Your face dropped for a second, as you suddenly remembered how far you were from work. “But how will I get to the bakery?” You asked. You didn’t have a car. Never needed one. But now, public transportation from this far into the city would be a nightmare.

“Charles will drive you.”

You looked at him quizzically. “But doesnt he have another job to be at? You know, for Bruce?”

Jason shook his head. “Not anymore. As of today he is your fill time driver and bodyguard.”

“Bodyguard?” You asked. Confused.

Jason’s grip around your waist tightens a bit. “After yesterday, Bruce suggested that we have Charles take on a new role as your bodyguard. He will be there when I am not. Just as a precaution. Just in case.”

You thought about it for a minute, you never in a thousand years would have thought that you, Y/N, an average girl, needed a bodyguard. The idea was far beyond your understanding, but it didn’t seem so bad. Plus, you really like Charles.

“Okay.” You said with a smile. “But it's going to be a bit difficult to explain to Pam and Jim why I have a large man following me at all times.” You said with a laugh.

“Oh, and one more thing.” He said, turning around to run into the kitchen to grab the invite. He handed you the envelope and watched as you opened it.

Your eyes lit up. You had heard about the Wayne gala’s. Everyone in Gotham has. They were always the most exclusive events of the year. Only the best of the best were invited. 

“Alfred invited us. He’s doing a charity for the children’s hospital for Christmas this year. But only if you want to.”

“Of course I want to! But, I don’t have anything fancy enough to wear to this.” You said sadly.

Jason smirked, and wrapped his arms around you. “Well then let's get you a new dress today. I faintly remember you telling Dick we didn’t have any plans today. We do now. Oh, and…” He said taking out his wallet and grabbing a sleek black card. “It’s all on Bruce.” He said with a smirk.

When you woke up that morning, the only plan you had was to finish up reading the book you had started last week. But now, not only were you moving in with Jason, into a penthouse no less, but you were about to go shopping for a brand new dress paid for by none other than Bruce Wayne. All for a gala hosted by the Wayne family.

You turned to look at Jason. “If this is a dream. Don’t wake me.” You said with a laugh.

“That makes two of us.” Jason said smirk as he leaned forward to capture your lips into his.

#jason todd x reader #gangster waynes #jason todd imagines #jason todd #mobster jason todd #gangster jason todd #red hood x reader #red hood #AU #Batfamily #batman #jason todd x y/n #jason todd fanfiction #red hood x you #jason todd x you #jason x reader #the waynes #mob AU #dick grayson #nightwing #alfred #bruce wayne

[milla-frenchy]

Roads part 4

3k7 | Joel Miller x fem reader Chapt summary: Joel's complex personality continues to disrupt your relationship Warnings: 18+ mdni. Dubcon mutual somnophilia (the subject has been discussed before for reader, not for Joel), alternate POV, 69, cum eating (m/f), semi public (car sex at night), dirty talk, degradation, praise kink, oral (m receving), unprotected piv, creampie, jealousy a/n: A big shout out to @toxicanonymity, somno queen. sleeping beauty was the first fic with somnophilia content that I read, and... Oh my 🥵🖤 @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog Thank you for always taking time for me🥰❤️🫂 Spotify playlist | ao3 | Series masterlist

Masterlist

Part 3

Tommy, at first, was uptight about your relationship with Joel. You saw him sometimes looking thoughtfully at Joel, but as the weeks passed he relaxed.

He asked you: “Is he good to you?”

“Yes Tommy. He is. Truely. Never felt so good for years.” You hugged him, and added “Really Tommy. I'm happy with him"

“Ok, honey. I just want you to be happy.”

Your relationship with Joel was going well although he still had moments of insecurity, notably the first times you were at the pub after the altercation, he had hugged you so tightly that you had to ask him to loosen his embrace. “It’s ok, Joel. I’m not going anywhere." He looked at you, nodded before kissing your neck.

Tommy's eyes widened when he saw the scene and finally got used to your relationship.

Sarah was coming for the holidays in a few days, Joel had spoken to her about you, initiating the subject awkwardly and with apprehension, but his daughter was much more open minded and refined than him.

“Well that explains why you've been less grumpy over the last few months on the phone! I'm happy for you dad. It's about time you thought about yourself.”

Joel grumbled then said “Grumpy? You talk like Tommy”

“He’s not wrong about that. So what’s her name?”

Joel told her your name, and Sarah added “Wait a minute, like Tommy’s friend? It's her?"

"It is. Heard 'bout her?"

"Oh man about a million times! She seems great from what Tommy told me about her. That's so cool! I almost met her a few years ago"

“What do you mean?”

“You had to leave for the 4th of July for work and I had to stay with Tommy. He wanted the three of us to spend the day together. He bought some fireworks and told me the Smiths loved them, but I wasn't so sure about that.”

“Jesus…”

“Anyway, you had finished your project and returned on time and it didn't happen, you surprised me by taking me to Austin. Tommy didn't even have time to talk to her about me but he was sure she wouldn't mind. He often spoke to me about her, she seemed so cool dad!”

“She is” he said, smiling.

“How did you make her fall for you, rusty man?”

“I dunno kid,” he laughed.

The day before Sarah arrived, you were spending the night at his house.

Joel woke up during the night, you were lying face to face. He watched you sleep for a few minutes, your face barely lit by the moonlight. And he thought about the fantasy you told him about several days ago. His cock hardened immediately.

He wanted to please you, he knew what you wanted, you had described it to him with  precision. And he was going to oblige you. 

He gently removed the sheet, revealing your naked body.

He turned you onto your back, slowly, taking the opportunity to spread your thighs wide enough for him to insert himself between them. You sighed in your sleep.

His cock was so hard it hurt. He spit saliva on his hand and stroked it, before sliding his shaft gently against your clit, brushing it just like you asked. You frowned in your sleep but didn't wake up.

He licked his fingers and applied as much saliva as he could to the tip of his cock.

He grabbed the base of his cock in his hand, and slid into your entrance, just inserting the tip, and stopping so as not to hurt you. Your folds tightened against him and he bit back a moan. You were so tight. He thought about what you had asked him specifically, and he pushed slowly. In one single slow drive, he bottomed out.

**********************

You woke up instantly, feeling like you were split in two, first.

Then, experiencing what you’ve been wanting for years, but never found the person to share it with until… Joel. Being fucked while you were sleeping. Excitement immediately took over the pain.

You looked at Joel's face and whined, closing your eyes immediately.

He brought his lips to your ear, and whispered, “I need to fuck. I need to empty my balls.”

“Fuck” you exhaled, feeling your pussy squeeze him immediately upon hearing it.

“Shut up. Don't wanna hear you, except for your fucking moans.”

He put his hand over your mouth and started fucking you hard. You licked his palm, looking at him.

“You’re such a whore,” he said.

His body weighed heavily on yours, his other arm rested near your head, leaning on his elbow, his fist and jaw clenched.

“Fuck… you’re so good for my cock. So tight” he raised his chest to look down at the base of his cock sinking into your pussy for a few moments, then he lay on top of you again.

He growled, you had raised your pelvis to rub your clit against him.

“Need to cum in your fucking pussy. That’s it, yeah like that… my slut’s cunt is so wet now.”

You came instantly, just before he shot his loads of cum deep inside your pussy and filled you up.

Once you finished milking his cock, he rolled onto his back, looked at you while your eyes were still closed after your orgasm, then turned to the other side.

Then again, he was doing exactly what you asked him to do.

Both of you fell back asleep.

He woke up two hours later. It was still dark, you were asleep on your back, in the position he had left you, breathing softly.

His cock was hard again, he settled between your thighs after quickly wetting it with his saliva on his fingers.

He rubbed his cock against your entrance, still wet from the cum that had leaked out of you while you slept.

He bottomed out in one push, much easier than a couple hours ago, with the help of your juices. He put his hand over your mouth immediately.

You woke up full of him and widened your eyes.

“You like being my fucking slut?”

You nodded, after a few seconds, once again out of your deep sleep.

“Does it turn you on, to be fucked twice while you sleep, with my cum still dripping from your fucking soaked pussy?”

You nodded again.

“I’m gonna fuck you stupid, baby. You’re so fucking wet and filled with my cum.” He fucked you rough. You gasped into the palm of his hand.

"You're such a slut, taking my cock like that."

Then he alternated rhythms, sometimes fucking you quickly and tapping your G spot repeatedly, sometimes softer but harder, filling you up completely.

Your gasps became moans.

Until he came and filled you again, his jolts drawing another orgasm out of you.

You fell asleep again without saying a word.

The next morning you woke up to the rising sun. Joel lay on his back, breathing softly.

You looked at his cock. Pink, soothed and soft. Moist from the night.

Until now, you always took it in your mouth when he was already hard, but that time you wanted to feel it growing there.

You settled head to tail in relation to him, resting on your knees and your elbows, but without stepping over him.

You took it in your hand and moaned feeling it so vulnerable.

You heard him growl, and you quickly bent down to lick the tip of his cock before he woke up. Running your tongue over his slit. You felt his cock twitch and you smiled.

You took his tip in your mouth, drunk by the taste on your tongue. Yours, his. You felt the flattering in your pussy, and your wetness already flowing again.

He woke up feeling the heat around his cock.

“Fuck… Come here baby, let me taste you”, he said.

You straddled his body with your legs, your pussy level with his face. He put his hands on your hips, slid his tongue inside you, and licked everything you were soaked in. Your juices, his cum.

He lapped up, harvesting everything he could on his tongue.

You had taken him fully into your mouth, and sucked him, your lips surrounding him as best you could, one hand fixed on the base of his shaft, the other stroking his balls and sliding them under your fingers.

You slowed down as you felt your orgasm coming, unable to keep up your pace on his cock. You jerked him off, keeping your mouth just around his tip, focusing your tongue on his slit and the thickened edges of its tip.

You came together, your mouths filled with each other. He shot his cum on your tongue and in your mouth, and you swallowed every drop. 

You continued to lick each other gently, being careful not to overstimulate each other.. Just trying to make you and him feel good for as long as possible, and as gently as possible, until your spasms ended.

You then came to lie down against him, saying "morning baby" smiling, before kissing him. He took you in his arms, while both of you caught your breath.

“ya liked it?”

“Fuck yeah. You fulfilled my fantasy perfectly baby”

He went to pick Sarah up from the airport, you had agreed that you would meet her the next day. They spent the day together, Sarah talked about how her student life was going, and Joel gave an update on his work.

“Why isn’t your girlfriend here?”

“Because I wanted us to spend time together. Not to disturb you.”

“I’m not 5 anymore dad…” she laughed. I want you to be happy.

“We’re taking it slowly. I like it this way.”

"OK. And does that suit her?”

He frowned “Yes, I think so. Everything is going well between us”

The next day you met Sarah and you immediately got on well. Tommy and Maria also came to Joel's barbecue.

You kept your distance from him, staying friendly but without particular outpouring, not wishing to make him uncomfortable. You didn't want to feel that he didn't know how to handle the situation with Sarah.

Years without an official relationship had made him lonely, and you felt he needed some time. You gave it to him, without any reservation or animosity.

You haven't seen each other much over the holidays. You wanted Joel to spend time with his daughter, and you were happy to have time for you, too.

At the end of the holidays, after dropping his daughter off at the airport, Joel came to your house.

He kissed and hugged you once the door closed.

“Thank you. Thank you for being so understanding. I… don’t really know how to handle all of this, I need time and you gave me some.”

“Of course Joel."

He hugged you tighter, his embrace lifting you slightly off the ground.

“Movie night?” you asked him. 

“Yeah sure.”

Coming home from the cinema, you put your hand on his thigh in the car. He looked down at it, then looked at you. You moved your hand up his thigh, and as you reached his crotch you bit your lip.

“What are you doing sweetheart?”

"Catching up... I wanna suck your cock and get fucked in the back of your car"

He nodded and moved his right arm away from the steering wheel.

You pulled down his zipper and carefully took his cock out of his pants, not to get it caught in the zipper. He was already hard. You spat in your hand and jerked him gently.

"You should stop the car baby" you told him, before leaning over his cock, and running your saliva over it. You took it into your mouth, wrapping your lips around its tip and caressing it with your tongue.

The car swerved. “Told you baby,” you said, smiling, before taking him back into your mouth.

“Fuck…” he said. He turned into a residential area, and parked in a dimly lit spot. His cock out of his pants and boxers, your mouth around it, dropping further and further to the base.

He placed his hand on your head before grabbing a handful of hair in his fist. He let his head fall against the headrest for a few moments, then looked down at the back of your head. 

You let your saliva accumulate and flow down your chin, alternating your sucking rhythms. He let you set your pace, enjoying the sensations on his cock.

“Can’t - fuck… can’t believe you’re sucking my cock in a car at night. Couldn’t wait to come home?”

“Mmm mm” you said, to make him understand that no, you couldn't wait.

“I missed your mouth baby.”

You moaned at his words, and pulled back so you only had the tip in your mouth. You licked its slit, then ran your tongue over its entire length, from base to tip.

“Fuck,” he moaned. 

You did it twice, three times, then you took him whole in your mouth again. He released his fist and placed his hand on your head, while he pushed his cock down your throat. You gasped.

“Don’t move”, he commanded.

Tears in the corner of your eyes, you waited for him to release you before pulling away and breathing.

“Go ahead baby,” he commanded. 

You took him back into your mouth at your own pace. You heard him moan louder and louder, until you released him and grabbed the door handle.

"What are you doing?" he asked you.

"I told you I wanted you to fuck me in the back of your car."

He pulled his t-shirt down over his cock and got out of the car. You were waiting for him on all fours, head turned towards the rear window of the car.

He knelt behind you and lifted your dress. He pulled down your panties, just enough so that you could spread your thighs a little.

He licked his fingers and came to rub your soaking pussy.

“So wet baby” he said

He entered you with one thrust, making you cry out and almost making you hit the door with your head.

“Fuck, Joel!”

And he fucked you, rough. Burrowing into you and tapping your cervix with every hip thrust, his hands gripping you, thumbs digging into your flesh.

“You like that, being fucked in the back of a car, like a fucking whore?”

His rhythm forced you to put your hand against the glass. He grabbed your wrists with his hands and held them crossed on your lower back, forcing you to drop your head against the seat of the backseat.

He pounded on you continuously, growling. But the feeling wasn't enough for him. He held your wrists tight in one of his hands, and grabbed your shoulder to push deeper into you.

“You’re such -fuck… a slut. Takin' me so good”

His pace wasn't slowing, your mind was barely able to think. You just wanted to feel him as long as possible. Someone could have passed the car and still you would not be able to stop.

“Wanted my cock so bad.”

He dropped your shoulder and slowed the pace.

"No, Joel, don't slow down, please…"

“I want you to cum”

He slipped his index finger into his mouth to wet it, then lowered it to brush against your clit, and roll his finger against it.

“Squeeze my cock, baby, come on”

You let him impose the rhythm he wanted on your body, and felt your pleasure rise under his fingers.

“Joel…”

“Yeah, i feel you pussy clenching around my cock. Come on, baby. Come on my cock”

You felt a wave of warmth wash over you before your clit twitched under his fingers. Your spasms made him cum, he sent his load deep inside your pussy. Finally he released your wrists.

He sat on the backseat, and you turned towards him, saying “damn, i missed it.” He smiled and kissed you.

The next day, during breakfast, you asked him

"So...how was Sarah's vacation?"

“Good. It was nice to see her again.”

"Of course. It must not have been easy, so many weeks without seeing her.”

He nodded.

You felt this strange and uncomfortable lump return to your gut. Your worry increased.

You felt him distant, but didn't know how to broach the subject. You were afraid of touching a too sensitive spot and making him feel cornered. You told yourself that he needed time, but an unpleasant feeling was tugging at your insides.

Weeks passed. You never managed to address the subject that worried you. You cursed yourself internally for not having the courage to do it. But you knew you were afraid the discussion would lead to something too hard to hear.

You felt you wanted... more. Not knowing what exactly. Move in with him? You brushed the idea from your mind. You loved your independence, your house. Confronted with your own contradictions and your concern for Joel, you buried the subject in yourself.

**************************************

Since Sarah's vacation, Joel felt his anxiety growing. He loved you, but Sarah's mother's departure haunted him, and even though the situation was different this time, he was scared. Of not being able to give you what you wanted. Joel sensed that you wanted more, but felt unable to give it to you, didn't know how to. He wondered how long the situation would go on without the subject being discussed. He knew how patient you were with him, and he was grateful to you. So grateful he hated himself. He felt like he was hearing Tommy say that he was just a bear, incapable of giving himself to anyone. Yet he had given you so much so far, like never before.

One morning, your phone rang while you were taking a shower. Joel looked at the screen. Stefan.

He put down the phone and waited for you to come out of the bathroom, and said "your ex-boyfriend called."

“Mmm?”

“That f…Stefan”

"Oh, ok" You saw his fists clenching, and you didn't like it. You felt your annoyance rising.

"Are you gonna call him back?"

“Why would I call him back?”

His knuckles were white under the pressure of his fists.

“Talk to me, Joel.”

“I can’t stand him calling you,” he said in a cold voice.

“You have nothing to worry about -”

“Really?”

“Joel!” You recoiled, choked at hearing his words.

He was silent for a few moments then said “Tell me about you and him. How you met.” his voice was low.

You sighed. “I met him a few years ago. He's a friend of a friend. He's a singer and a guitar player in a rock band. I went to see them at a gig. We started talking about music, and then it happened.”

“How long after you met him?”

“Few weeks i think”

“How long did it last? The first time”

“Few months”

“How was it ?

“What are you talking about ?”

“Fucking him.”

“This conversation is going too far Joel."

“He was a good fuck?” he insisted.

“Wanna know the size of his cock too? Damn…” You shook your head. “It wasn't like you and me, far from it.” He grinned like it didn't matter.

“Why did you end it?”

“Because i had enough. Can't really say more. I didn't see it as a relationship. Can't say I was really attached to him.”

“But you fucked him.”

“Yeah... Yeah. I can fuck someone and not love them, so what?”

“You never loved him?”

“No”

“But he loved you”

“I think he did, yeah.”

“You had no problem with that?”

“No.” You sighed again. “That’s enough Joel. This discussion…is unhealthy and has gone way too far. I'm not comfortable with that. Stefan and I, it’s the past. You need to work on this Joel and I'll help you if you want but I can't do it for you. I have my past, you have yours. And if you don't trust me, we have a problem."

 "It's not that."

“Yes, that’s exactly that. And what are you gonna do if you see him in the pub? Break his jaw?" You regretted saying it, and saw that he was hurt.

You looked at the clouds, standing by the window, not knowing what to do. Hurt by the fact that he was unable to express his feelings, except the negative ones. You felt that you gave away too much of yourself in this conversation, while he gave you nothing in return, just jealousy.

"You can't behave like that. We're not teenagers Joel. I know that the departure of Sarah's mother was terrible.  I know that starting our relationship wasn't easy for you. But this? I can't Joel… It's toxic. If we don't communicate properly…" 

You were tired of what was happening and stopped there. You grabbed your purse and headed towards the door. You turned to look at him and said with tears in your eyes: “I love you. And I hate you for making me say it at such a terrible time. I love YOU. Not him. I’m with YOU. Not with him." You hesitated, and murmured "Fuck you, Joel.”

You slammed the door behind you, hoping he would follow you, in vain. Your tears flowed as you got into your car. You started the car and drove away.

************************************************

Joel hated himself at that moment. The feeling of regressing again and disappointing you. The moment he saw that name on your phone screen, he was torn with emotions. His feelings for you, his fear of losing you. 

Everything was swirling around in his mind. And those thoughts were driving him crazy. He couldn't think straight anymore.

He trusted you totally. He didn't recognize himself as this jealous person.

And a part of him knew he was sabotaging himself, during this discussion. He knew he was going too far, but couldn’t stop. 

He still couldn't formulate in his mind why he was doing it. He knew he was being unfair to you. He let himself be overwhelmed by his emotions while you were always patient with him.

He watched you leave his house and slam the door. And instead of catching up to you like he wanted to, hug you and tell you that he loved you, he just stood in the dining room, hating himself for hurting you.

Part 5

********************** Thank you for reading 🙏 Comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated ❤️

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#joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller smut #joel x reader #joel tlou #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller x you #joel miller fic #joel miller fan fiction #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fandom #pedro pascal as joel miller #joel x you #joel miller x female reader #somnophilia

[delirious-donna]

Kinktober Masterlist

The time has come for the masterlist to be revealed, along with the posting order! What started out as daring to brave 16 days, so half the month, has evolved into a full-blown month of content! Am I crazy? Yes, the answer is yes...

The event is for 18+ readers only, minors and ageless blogs please do not interact! Given the event and time of year, there will some darker content than I normally dabble in, proceed with care (warnings will be available on each post)

There is an event-specific taglist form, it can be found here.

The fandoms included are Naruto, Black Clover, Jujutsu Kaisen, Tokyo Revengers, Bleach, MHA & Fairy Tail.

Please consider reblogging, the biggest of cuddles to those who do! ^^

oct. 1: Tempting the Babysitter

Dry Humping - Itachi Uchiha x female reader The kids are asleep and the house is quiet. Now would be the perfect time for your boyfriend to swing by, right?

oct. 2: Handprints

Spanking/Brat Taming - Gojo Satoru x female reader You've tested his patience all day long, are you surprised he finally snapped? Gojo won't be happy until his handprint is emblazoned on your butt.

oct. 3: An Improper Bet

Breeding - Nozel Silva x female reader Nozel's rivalry with Fuegoleon takes an improper turn when the Crimson Lions' captain declares he will have a child first. Nozel is determined to prove him wrong, will you help?

oct. 4: Let Me Draw You A Map

Body Worship - Kakucho x female reader A moment of self-doubt has Kakucho determined to show you exactly what he loves about you.

oct. 5: Keep Me Warm

Cockwarming - Kakashi Hatake x female reader An intimate camping trip turns unseasonably colder than expected, it'll be up to Kakashi to keep you warm right through 'til morning.

oct. 6: Shall I Tell You A Tale?

Dirty Talk - Licht x female reader Awoken by a nightmare in the dead of night, your beloved Licht won't let you suffer. Settle in for a delightfully lewd story that might require some audience participation...

oct. 7: A Dreamer's Delight

Somnophilia - Sasuke Uchiha x female reader He shouldn't be doing this, should he? Sasuke can't help but be tempted to bring you to orgasm before your eyelids flutter open. Will he succeed?

oct. 8: Purr For Me

Praise - Nanami Kento x female reader Nanami finds it so adorable when you look at him with those big, shiny doe eyes. Has he noticed that you do it more when he sings your praises? Oh yes, and he plans to make you purr for him.

oct. 9: The Will Of A Lioness

Edging/Orgasm Denial - Mereoleona Vermillion x female reader You might be the favoured plaything of the eldest Vermillion, but that doesn't mean she is going to go easy on you. So you want to make things more exclusive, huh? Can you hang on to your orgasm long enough to ensure she agrees?

oct. 10: The Longest Wait (Celebrating the return of Bleach!!)

Facesitting - Ichigo Kurosaki x female reader Ten years have passed since you started dating Ichigo, and every year he tries to convince you to perch yourself upon his handsome face. A decade is long enough to make a man wait, so tonight is his lucky night!

oct. 11: Ride Of Your Life

Bike Sex - Draken x female reader What begins as a romantic road trip, takes a kinky twist when you find yourself pressing closer to Draken's back. Will he make it to the picnic area before his desire runs rampant?

oct. 12: All The Better To Eat You!

Size - Kiba Inuzuka x female reader Giant-sized palms, towering height, the longest incisors you've ever seen on a human and that's all before heading below the waist. Is Kiba more wolfman than human?

oct. 13: The Most Delicious Tears

Overstimulation/Dacryphilia - Sting Eucliffe x female reader He just wants to spoil you rotten, that it's enough to make you cry? All the better. Sting is going to lick away those tasty tears, but he's not gonna stop...

oct. 14: The Darkest Reflection

Mirror Sex - Megumi Fushiguro x female reader Desperate for your loving boyfriend to be just a bit rougher in bed, be careful what you wish for... Megumi will be as rough as you'd like and he'll make you watch every intimate act in startling clarity.

oct. 15: A Public Performance (Julius' Birthday!)

Exhibitionism - Julius Novachrono x female reader A certain Wizard King thinks he can evade his own birthday celebrations, but little does he know that you are already onto his plans and will track him down at all costs. You'll give him his birthday kiss and more, even if it's out in public!

oct. 16: The First Bite Is The Deepest (Kiri’s Birthday!)

Biting - Eijirou Kirishima x female reader You can't help but admire your boyfriend's deadly sharp teeth. He has lost count of the times he has told you off for dragging your tongue across them... but now, finally, Kiri agrees to bite you properly.

oct. 17: Adorned By Lace And Shadows

Lingerie - Shikamaru Nara x female reader It's been some time since your man indulged you in anything more than a quickie. What better way to tempt the lazy genius than with some new - and highly revealing - lingerie. Will he bite?

oct. 18: An Extra Session

Corruption - Geto Suguru x female reader Your psychiatrist is always so kind and accommodating, does he treat all his patients this well? The answer is no. You're special and Dr Geto is going to use all your weaknesses to his advantage...

oct. 19: Scandalous Behaviour

Breeding - Fuegoleon Vermillion x female reader You've heard rumours that Nozel Silva is trying desperately for a baby, and apparently, it's because of a silly bet. Your darling Fue would never stoop to such scandalous behaviour... or would he?

oct. 20: A Bound Offering

Bondage - Grimmjow Jaegerjaquez x female reader Selected as a fitting tribute to the monstrous man that protects your village and surrounding lands, you expect to meet your end. What might happen if he takes a liking to your innocence? He especially likes you bound and at his mercy... does he have any?

oct. 21: Love Hurts

Degradation - Mikey (Bonten) x female reader Your boyfriend was the most loving man, most of the time, but sometimes he was the meanest person walking this Earth and he was going to make you cry from the venom he'd spout.

oct. 22: Turning The Tables

Handcuffs - Gojo Satoru x female reader A kinky present bought as a joke shift into a weapon when you turn the tables and tie the most powerful sorcerer in the world to your headboard. Gojo Satoru at your mercy? Better make the most of it!

oct. 23: Dance My Pretty

Puppet Strings/Dub Con - Kankuro x female reader You've always found Kankuro's chakra threads abilities fascinating, but will it be as interesting when he decides to utilise them on you? What might he make you do against your will?

oct. 24: A Misuse Of Magic

Double Penetration - William Vangeance x female reader Magic should be used to protect the Clover Kingdom and its people. It certainly shouldn't be used to try something new in the bedroom, but can you deny the way your heart races as branches twist around your thigh?

oct. 25: Show Me That Tongue

Face Fucking - Toji Fushiguro x female reader Toji has a debt to collect and you just happen to be along for the ride as his new partner. He has no need for a partner, not unless you plan on putting that smartass mouth to better use?

oct. 26: What Did You Call Me?

Daddy - Gaara x female reader A moment of passion turns into something dark and twisted when you let slip a new pet name. Rather than be repulsed, it strikes a match against a primal part of Gaara's soul.

oct. 27: Dance On My Lap, Doll (Hanma’s Birthday!)

Thigh Riding - Hanma x female reader A birthday trip to a lap dancing bar takes an unexpected turn when Hanma's sights fall squarely on the most innocent-looking girl in the joint, and she sure ain't a lap dancer...

oct. 28: Popping “That” Cherry

Anal - Kakashi Hatake x female reader You want to try something new, but what? When Kakashi suggests anal, you can't help but blush, prompting your horny fella to realise that you've never popped that cherry. Why is he smiling at you like that?

oct. 29: Breaking The Contract

Age Gap - Nanami Kento x female reader Your sugar daddy Nanami is the most attentive man you've ever spent time with. The fact that he is extremely well endowed and as handsome as a chiselled sculpture is merely an extra bonus. Perhaps it's time to rip up your contract?

oct. 30: Taking The Lead

Pegging - Itachi Uchiha x female reader An accidental finger slip clues you into the fact that your darling husband likes his butt being fingered. Poor Itachi is embarrassed yet he has nothing to be ashamed of and you're going to prove that...

oct. 31: Stalked By Night

CNC - Ran & Rindou Haitani x female reader You've always been warned against walking the streets at night alone, but you never expected that you would be abducted by two of the most wanted criminals in the country. What do they plan to do with you?

#delirious writes #delirious event #kinktober masterlist #kinktober 2022 #kinktober #tokyo revengers smut #jujutsu kaisen smut #black clover smut #mha smut #fairy tail smut #bleach smut #naruto smut

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Async mugwump linkdump

I'm on tour with my new, nationally bestselling novel The Bezzle! Catch me TOMORROW in ANAHEIM at WONDERCON: YA Fantasy, Room 207, 10 a.m.; Signing, 11 a.m.; Teaching Writing, 2 p.m., Room 213CD.

For 20+ years, I've processed all the information that came over my transom by blogging – mulling on why something I saw in the world caught my attention and trying to summarize it for strangers. This turns out to be a very powerful way to do a lot of different kinds of mental work:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/05/09/the-memex-method/

With Pluralistic, the solo blog I founded 4 years ago, I've moved into longer, more synthetic essays that try to connect the things that caught my attention today with all those things I've written about for the past two decades. That's also proven very fruitful:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/02/20/fore/#synthesis

But this move to longer works has a downside: sometimes I'll arrive at the week's end and have a list of things that caught my attention without there being any obvious way to connect them, and when that happens, I devote a Saturday edition to a linkdump. There's been 15 of these so far:

https://pluralistic.net/tag/linkdump/

Welcome, then, to the 16th Pluralistic linkdump, and a warning, this one starts with an obituary.

Ross Anderson was one of the heroes of the cryptographic revolution, a brilliant scientist and communicator, a fantastic activist, and a scorching curmudgeon. Ross died this week. He was 67, and had chronic heart issues as well as long covid:

https://www.lightbluetouchpaper.org/2024/03/29/rip-ross-anderson/

There's so much that's been written about Ross and his legacy already, and there's doubtless more to come, but I've picked out two pieces to point you to. The first is from Danny O'Brien, who was also the guy who talked me down off the ledge the first time Ross flamed me on a public mailing list, leaving me bleeding and furious:

https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=39868983

As Danny says, Ross was "the model of a politically and socially involved computer scientist," a man whose blazing intellect, fierce moral center and relentless curiosity inspired a generation of technologists to think about politics, and a generation of political activists to think about technology. Few of Ross's eulogizers (thus far) have mentioned how Ross's passion came out as fury, and – as someone who counted Ross as a friend and inspiration – I think this is a serious omission. It's hard to imagine Ross doing all that he did without understanding the anger that – along with his ethics – fueled his passion.

(Compare with @neil-gaiman's classic essay on the anger of Terry Pratchett:)

https://www.theguardian.com/books/2014/sep/24/terry-pratchett-angry-not-jolly-neil-gaiman

The other obit that I want to point you to comes from Bill Buchanan, one of Ross's closest collaborators. Buchanan's memorial for Ross does a superb job of rounding up Ross's technical contributions to the field of security engineering:

https://medium.com/asecuritysite-when-bob-met-alice/ross-anderson-rip-59233c75fadf

Buchanan embeds videos for some of Ross's best speeches, links to his key papers (including the classic "Programming Satan's Computer," on "programming a computer which gives answers that are subtly and maliciously wrong at the most inconvenient moment possible), reminiscences of Great Moments In Ross Anderson, and terrific, lay-friendly breakdowns of some of Ross's key mathematical work.

As an unreasonable, angry person, I take great inspiration from people who channel their unreasonable anger to socially beneficial conduct – like whistleblowers. After Baltimore's Francis Scott Key Bridge was totaled by the 95,000-ton cargo ship MV *Dali(, a vast cohort of instant experts in structural engineering, sea freight and shipbuilding has taken to the internet with a slurry of takes on the Meaning Of the Bridge.

Some of these are very stupid indeed, like the idea that somehow "DEI" caused the collision. But you don't have to be an expert in maritime issues or civil engineering to understand the importance of this report from The Lever about shipping giant Maersk's culture of retaliation against whistleblowers:

https://www.levernews.com/feds-recently-hit-cargo-giant-in-baltimore-disaster-for-silencing-whistleblowers/

Maersk is the company that chartered the MV Dali; Maersk is also a key player in the cartel that controls the world's shipping. Maersk was just sanctioned by the Labor Department for retaliating against a whistleblower who complained of unsafe conditions on the ships that Maersk chartered:

https://www.dol.gov/sites/dolgov/files/OPA/news%20releases/Maersk-Sec%20Findings%20-FINAL%20071423_Redacted.pdf

Maersk's policy required employees to bring concerns to their supervisors before alerting the Coast Guard or others. This is not how that stuff is supposed to work. OSHA called this policy “repugnant” and a “reprehensible and an egregious violation of the rights of employees,” which “chills them from contacting the [Coast Guard] or other authorities without contacting the company first.”

The whistleblower – chief mate on the Safmarine Mafadi – complained of "unrepaired leaks, unpermitted alcohol consumption onboard, inoperable lifeboats, faulty emergency fire suppression equipment, and other issues." We don't know (yet) what happened on the Dali, but it's obvious that a company that retaliates against whistleblowers, rather than heeding their warnings, is prioritizing covering its ass, not operating safely.

Which brings me (inevitably) to Boeing, and to poor John "Swampy" Barnett, the Boeing whistleblower who took his own life earlier this month. Barnett's suicide has stirred up similar low-yield online chatter focused on whether Boeing assassinated Barnett, a question that categorically cannot be answered through the method of arguing with internet strangers.

But there is a lot to say about Barnett: in particular, there's the substance of his whistleblowing, the specifics of his complaints about Boeing. For that, we can turn to the always-fantastic Maureen Tkacik, whose American Prospect piece "Suicide Mission" is definitive:

https://prospect.org/infrastructure/transportation/2024-03-28-suicide-mission-boeing/

Tkacik does a great job of painting a picture of Swampy as a member of the tribe of unreasonable and angry people who refuse to sideline principle in order to get along. More importantly, Tkacik shows us what made Swampy so angry: a company that was hell-bent on lobotimizing itself by forcing out any technical expert who might point out inconvenient truths about the safety risks of high-profit strategies.

As Tkacik writes, Boeing once thought about "knowledge" in terms of expertise that could be brought to bear on the unimaginably complex task of making reliable, airworthy jets. But under the "value-engineering" financialized culture that arose after the McDonnell-Douglas merger, the company viewed knowledge as "intellectual property, trade secrets, and data." In other words, the point of knowledge was rent-extraction, not safety.

At the root of this transformation was the Jack Welch protege Jim "Prince Jim" McNerney, the former 3M CEO who took the helm at Boeing. McNerney was openly contemptuous of the company's senior engineers, branding them "phenomenally talented assholes" and rewarding managers who found ways to force them out of the company. It was McNerney who decided to produce the 787 "Dreamliner" in non-union shops, far from Seattle and its phenomenally talented assholes. Instead of these engineers, McNerney turned to Boeing suppliers to do the major engineering work on the 787 – despite the fact that many of these suppliers "lacked engineering departments."

The 787 was, infamously, a $80b-over-budget boondoggle, haunted by technical failures. Swampy was part of the "cleanup crew" that tried to salvage the 787, and witnessed first-hand how the company purged all the engineers who managed to ship the 787 despite McNerney and his "value engineers" and retaliated against workers who tried to unionize the South Carolina facility.

In particular, it was safety inspector who came in for the most savage punishment. When the FAA decided to let Boeing mark its own homework – hiring in-house safety inspectors to replace government inspectors – they pretended to believe that these Boeing-payrolled inspectors would be able to operate independently of Boeing's leadership. The inspectors tried to operate this way (not least because they were criminally liable for oversights that occurred on their watch) and McNerney's Boeing came down on them like a ton of aviation-grade aluminum.

To further neuter these inspectors, Boeing management ordered the inspectors to outsource their work to the mechanics they were supposed to be supervising – that is, the FAA outsourced safety checks to Boeing inspectors, and the inspectors outsourced those checks to the mechanics themselves. Tkacik: "Swampy believed relying on mechanics to self-inspect their work was not only insane but illegal under the Federal Aviation Administration charter."

Swampy kept careful records of every way in which this system produced unsafe aircraft and an unsafe workplace – including the day he discovered that someone had removed 400+ defective parts from the rejects box and installed them in aircraft in order to meet deadlines. Swampy's reports were key to establishing that the company's much-trumpeted "improvements" in safety reports were down to a culture of "bullying" – not any improvement in safety itself.

When Boeing went to war against Swampy, they barely bothered to pretend that they were playing by the rules. He was told one day that he was four-weeks into a 60-day "corrective action" that no one had told him about. The "corrective action" paperwork had a blank for Swampy's comments. He wrote, "Leadership wants nothing in email so they maintain plausible deniability. It is obvious leadership is just looking for items to criticize me on so I stop identifying issues. I will conform!"

Shortly thereafter, he was forced out altogether. Managers who tried to bring him on their teams were told that no one was allowed to hire John Barnett. His name appeared on a secret internal memo entitled "Quality Managers to Fire." Meanwhile, the value of Boeing shares had tripled.

After Boeing's 737 Maxes started falling out of the sky, Swampy's painstaking documentation of the flaws in the 787's production took on a new urgency. A program of random inspections of 787s found major defects in all of them ("Boeing Looked for Flaws in Its Dreamliner and Couldn’t Stop Finding Them" –WSJ). An Aviation Week diagram of problem spots with the 787 marked red arrows over "every single section, from the tip of the nose to the horizontal stabilizers":

https://aviationweek.com/air-transport/new-boeing-787-fix-details-reveal-extent-gap-check-challenge

Boeing's war on "brilliance" did its work: after everyone who understood how to make a safe aircraft was forced out of the company, financialized CEOs were able to cut corners on safety, triple the share-price, scoop up billions in government subsidies and bailouts, all without those pesky "phenomenally talented assholes" pointing out that they were going get (lots of) people killed.

Tkacik closes by saying that Swampy's former work colleagues refuse to believe he killed himself. A former executive told her "I don’t think one can be cynical enough when it comes to these guys…It’s a top-secret military contractor, remember; there are spies everywhere." I confess that I don't know what to make of that, but I'll say this: if Boeing killed Swampy, that's just one of hundreds of murders they committed. Whether or not Swampy's death was their fault, the deaths of everyone who went down on the 737 Maxes that crashed is on their hands.

That's what "profits before people" means, after all: sacrificing human lives to make yourself richer. It's the foundational tenet of the conservative movement, though that impulse is often checked by other factors, like human decency. It's only when sociopaths get a sustained run at leadership that you see what they really want.

Which brings me to the UK, which has been governed by the Conservative Party for 14 years. The Tories are tipped to get destroyed in the next election, and a long article in the New Yorker by Sam Knight catalogs the many ways in which Tory rule has devastated the UK:

https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2024/04/01/what-have-fourteen-years-of-conservative-rule-done-to-britain

The thing is, after 14 years, it's impossible for the Tories to blame anyone else for the state of the UK. With strong Parliamentary majorities, Conservatives were able to govern as they pleased – the only compromises they made were between their own internal factions. The ideological commitment to making the rich richer, privatizing everything, subordinating governance to market forces – that's all them.

It's all them: the worst period for wage growth since the Napoleonic Wars, on them. The catastrophic traffic, housing, jobs market, and precarity, on them. Plummeting health, on them. The austerity, on them. The withering of the country's courts and prisons and police, its wilderness, its programs for young people and pensioners, its public health, its diplomatic corps, its road maintenance – on them.

A country where the police can't afford to prosecute burglaries – on them (4% of burglaries are prosecuted). The 2.5 year delay between a rape arrest and its trial? On them. Mass closures of schools that are literally crumbling? On them.

43% of the countries courts have closed. On them. Cuts to prison funding, coupled with longer sentences? On them.

And of course, Brexit – on them. Every part of it. The referendum. The referendum question. The failure to negotiate a deal with the EU. All on them. The collapse in British living standards, all on them. The fact that the 20% richest households in the UK have been untouched by all this? Also on them. But you might not notice it in London, where people earn an average of 400% more than people in Nottingham.

The only growth sector outside of London are the Citizens Advice Bureaux, whose client rosters are growing even as their funding is cut. Where the CAB once primarily catered to people who couldn't make ends meet due to disability, unemployment and other reliable predictors of economic distress, today, CAB advisors are seeing homeowners, people working two jobs. Desperation is "like a black hole, dragging more and more people in,"

More Conservative growth: Tories presided over a doubling in the rate of NHS antidepressant prescriptions, and a 20% rise in long-term health conditions. No wonder Tory Britain had the world's worst pandemic outcomes for a wealthy nation – that's on them, too.

Knight's article closes with a Tory MP who believes that "the key thing for the Conservatives now is to be more conservative…Toryism must have its day again."

We can't count on oligarchs to rescue us from oligarchy – not even when oligarchy's failures push society to the breaking point. There's always a rationalization explaining why we just had to lean harder into oligarchy.

You hear echoes of this in the pro-monopoly choir, whose squeals of outrage at the rise of a new anti-monopoly movement grow louder even as monopolism's failures grow clearer. One of the more tangible expressions of monopoly's failures is the Ticketmaster/Livenation octopus, which controls the entire live music industry – key venues, promotions, and ticketing. Ticketmaster fucks over music fans, but it also cheats famous musicians, the kinds of people with big microphones, so we know a lot about how bad it is:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/11/20/anything-that-cant-go-on-forever-will-eventually-stop/

Of course, the fact that Swifties hate Ticketmaster lets the pro-monopolists dismiss critics as foolish young girls, not Very Serious People Who Understand Economics and thus can see that Ticketmaster's monopoly is Good, Actually.

Last week, Congressman Bill Pascrell dumped a ton of litigation documents related to Ticketmaster's sleaze, and Matt Stoller broke them down:

https://www.thebignewsletter.com/p/explosive-new-documents-unearthed

The docs reveal how Ticketmaster's system of (formerly) secret kickbacks let it choke out any competitor, so that it could charge fans more and pay artists less. The mechanics of the scam are beautifully laid out in Stoller's post – as is the many ways in which it violated both the law and Ticketmaster's numerous consent decrees arising from its previous lawbreaking.

This kind of scam breakdown is essential. It's easy to think that we, as mere normies, can't hope to understand the machinations of the corporations that prey on us. But once you pierce the veil of performative complexity, what's left behind is a set of crude tricks and transparent ruses.

Here's one of those transparent ruses: Discord's terms of service require Discord users to actively opt out of its "binding arbitration" system. Binding arbitration is when you sign a contract saying you can't sue the company no matter how much it harms you – instead, you promise to have your disputes heard by an "arbitrator" (a fake judge paid by the company that screwed you). Unsurprisingly, these fake judges are awfully tolerant of their employers' crimes.

Discord says that once you click through its garbage legalese novella, you have just a few days to opt out of this binding arbitration clause – if you happen to miss that fine print, you have "consented" to giving up your legal rights.

But every time Discord changes its ToS, the clock for opting out starts ticking again, and Discord has just changed (that is, worsened) its ToS again:

https://discord.com/terms

That means that if you send an email right now to [email protected] with "I am confirming that as of the date of this email, I am choosing to opt out of binding arbitration to settle disputes with Discord" in the body, you can escape this consent theater:

https://mamot.fr/@[email protected]/112175832989845038

Consent theater is a particularly galling corporate ruse – the idea that we chose to allow them to abuse us. Consent theater gets more outrageous by the day. Take Soofa, who operate streetside digital kiosks that identify you by grabbing your phone's unique wifi and Bluetooth identifiers:

https://gizmodo.com/digital-kiosks-snatch-your-phones-data-when-you-walk-by-1851368948

Soofa sells this data to advertisers – claiming that by walking down a public street, you "consented" to being tracked and sold.

The only reason this flies is that the US hasn't passed a federal consumer privacy law since 1988's Video Privacy Protection Act, which bans video-store clerks from telling people which VHS cassettes you took home. Congress keeps on failing to pass a privacy law, despite garbage companies like Soofa.

But that hasn't stopped the administrative agencies from acting to defend your privacy! The FTC just dropped its latest Privacy and Data Security Update, a greatest hits list of the actions the Commission took while Congress failed:

https://www.ftc.gov/system/files/ftc_gov/pdf/2024.03.21-PrivacyandDataSecurityUpdate-508.pdf

One of the best things about the current administration is the number of extremely competent regulators who know exactly how much power they have and aren't afraid to use it to help the American people:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/10/18/administrative-competence/#i-know-stuff

The new FTC report, which details how the Commission's existing powers let it go after the commercial surveillance industry from smart doorbells to review fraud, from kids' programming to medical data, from lax security to data-breaches, is a bright spot in an otherwise grim week.

One more bright spot, then, before I wind up this linkdump. All week, I've been humming a half-remembered lyric, "come on baby/you're a link in this chain/put your hands together/and get free of the pain." For the life of me, I couldn't place it.

Last night, I searched for it (using Kagi, the post-Google search engine I've been paying for for the past month, and which I'm loving) and discovered that I had somehow completely forgotten a whole-ass band that I once loved: Toronto's Bourbon Tabernacle Choir, whom I saw live on many occasions.

The mystery lyric came from "Death is the Great Awakener," a fucking banger of a post-gospel track that I've been listening to on nonstop repeat as I wrote this. It's a hell of a tune and I'm intensely grateful to have it back in my life:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q6RUb63Tx3w

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/03/30/dewey-502/#rip-ross-anderson

Image: Waffleboy https://www.flickr.com/photos/waffleboy/28198395465/

CC BY 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

#linkdump #linkdumps #obits #ross anderson #rip #cryptographers #ftc #privacy #deliverism #tories #ukpoli #locational privacy #soofa #consent #consent theater #whistleblowers #corruption #francis scott key bridge #baltimore #maersk #osha #dali #boeing #John Barnett #aviation #maureen Tkacik #binding arbitration #discord #monopoly #ticketmaster

[mylovelies-docx]

Sorry, I Love You - Part 10

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!?! I'm finally posting Part 10 after an unplanned/unexpected hiatus?

Yes. I am. Sorry for the long wait!

Plot: You and Bucky have a good thing going - best of friends that also have more than a little chemistry between the sheets. Everything is fine until you develop feelings for the man who doesn't want a relationship. What will happen when Bucky finds out?

C/W: Angst, HYDRA experimentation, mentions of death. (Dear sweet Hyunjin in the gif below also a CW for myself and other Stays)

Word Count: 3,075

Tag List: NOW CLOSED! If you'd like to keep up with this story, please follow my blog and turn on notifications! ❤️ you :)

[Prologue][Part 1][Part 2][Part 3][Part 4][Part 5][Part 6][Part 7][Part 8][Part 9]

You hear Bucky’s key rattle in the front door and the soft snick as it closes downstairs. You’d arrived at your shared home only minutes ago, but that was plenty of time for you to race upstairs, lock your door, and start bawling into the pillow. You hiccup and choke, suffocating the sounds into the cotton fabric clenched between your teeth. 

Why?! Why did Bucky have to go and say that shit? As much as you had hoped and begged the universe for Bucky to say those words to you earlier this year, it responds to your pleas now?! You’ve spent months resigning yourself to having him as a friend only – that’s what he said he wanted! 

Why would he change his mind? Is it because he’s had a change of heart? Doubtful. Bucky was very certain in his decision to shut you down and out of his life. So what? Is it because you’re hanging out with Petre? Is he jealous? How? Why?

Bucky’s actions towards you tonight make no sense. Why would he say something that he knew would upset you? And if he didn’t think they’d upset you, what’d he expect? That you’d run and leap into his arms, no more words needed? Why the hell would he think that’s what would happen? He can’t just act like he didn’t completely eviscerate your heart that night in the alley and that morning in the kitchen. 

Those days are burned into your memory, not a day goes by that you don’t remember the way your words affected him and his response. He was so betrayed and angry that he lashed out at you for admitting that you wanted more than the no-strings-attached, friends-with-benefits situation that you had. 

But now – now! – he wants to say you could be together? Together in what way? As fuck-buddies again? Hell no. There’s no way that you will ever put yourself through that pain and hardship again. Not for him, not for anybody. You want something real. 

You’d wanted something real with Bucky, but he’d shot you down as soon as you’d brought it up.

Bucky’s footsteps shuffle from the front door and up the stairs, stopping just outside your door. You hold your breath but continue to flinch as your lungs spasm on unuttered cries.

A soft rap sounds at your door and Bucky murmurs your name softly into the doorjamb. You squeeze your eyes shut and keep your voice as calm and level as possible, but it still cracks when you say his name. “Leave me alone, Bucky.”

“Doll, I –”

“I don’t want to hear it!” You respond vehemently, chucking your wet pillow at the door. It smacks against the wood with a thwump and lands in a sad heap on the floor. It looks just like how you feel. “Just go away.”

You can hear Bucky suck in a shaky breath, but you refuse to picture his watery eyes and quivering lip. He has a right to feel like shit, but you are under no obligation to try and assuage his guilt when he’s the one that caused this whole mess.

His bare feet tread across the hallway and into his bedroom, his bedroom door barely making any sound as he closes it behind him. His shower starts up a few seconds later and stays on for nearly an hour. After that, his bed creaks and there’s not another sound to be heard.

You don’t sleep that night.

***

“I need to leave.”

“What?” Nat hisses through the phone. It may be 4 am here, but the team is having dinner together right now back in New York. Nat’s whispering voice is her attempt at keeping this conversation between the two of you while she walks away from the dining room to talk. You can hear her boot-clad leg thunk, thunk, thunk its way across the hardwood floors as she finds privacy.

“I need to get away from Bucky,” you explain further.

“What did that fucker do this time?” Nat questions menacingly, already gearing up to kick Bucky’s ass with no information.

You heave a sigh and watch your breath fog in the air, the cloud hanging heavy in front of your face before slowly dissipating in the humid, cold air. “He… he said something about us. As in, him and I. Like we could go back to how we were.” You bite your chapped lips and worry the dry pieces of skin with your teeth. “I didn’t handle it very well.”

Nat is silent for a long moment, the other end of the line buzzing over the long distance. Finally, she says, “He said he wanted to be friends with benefits again?”

“Well not exactly,” you hedge. “He got all weird and jealous when I was hanging out with Petre last night like I always do. We got into a fight and he said that it could be us sneaking off together like we used to and I just… I lost it.” You hurriedly wipe an oncoming tear out of your eye, surprised you’re even hydrated enough to produce anything after last night’s sob fest. You suck in a shaky breath and continue. “Nat, I can’t do it again. I can’t.”

“I know, honey,” Nat consoles, her voice soft as she shushes you. “I won’t let you do that to yourself again, either. You know I’m here for you – and so is the rest of the team.” You make a questioning noise at that last part and Nat explains. “Well… the whole team kind of knows why you left.”

“...they do?” You press the palm not holding your phone against your forehead, pushing hard to focus on anything but the embarrassment the situation makes you feel. You chuckle humorlessly and say, “Everybody must think I’m pathetic now.”

“We absolutely do not,” Nat states defensively. “Wanda and I were giving him so much shit after you left and no one knew why – Bucky eventually had to tell everyone after I nearly put him in a coma when he finally found the guts to spar with me.”

You do crack a genuine smile and laugh at that. “You’re telling me Wanda was mean to him?”

“Well, I mean,” Nat laughs as well, “she didn’t put smiley faces on his pancakes when she made everybody breakfast. Trust me when I say everyone noticed her displeasure with him.”

You feel the overwhelming urge to wrap Nat and Wanda up in hugs that are long overdue. The love for your friends overflows from your heart and manifests in your words: “I love you guys so much.” It’s no substitute for the hugs you want to give, but it’s all you can offer at the moment.

“We love you, too,” Nat replies. You’re both quiet for a moment, you soaking in the silence of the frozen outdoors and Nat chewing on the question you can practically hear filling her mouth and pushing against her lips.

You sigh heavily. “Out with it, Nat.”

She sucks in a breath before starting. “You know I’m always on your side…”

“Uh-huh.”

“...but are you sure that’s what Bucky meant?” she finishes.

“Huh?” you question dumbly. “What else could he have meant? He accused me of going off and fucking Petre every time we left a room – TMI, but that’s exactly what Bucky and I used to do. So when Bucky said we could be like that, I don’t see how he could have meant anything else.”

You hear a smack from Nat’s side of the line and a grumbled ‘stupid motherfucker…’ before she composes herself and resumes the conversation. “Do you want me to talk to him?”

“Not particularly,” you respond. “I’d rather you just come and get me.”

“You know I would in a heartbeat, but this mission took a long time to set up…”

“Yeah, I know,” you sigh. “I wouldn’t actually leave over this, but it’s just nice to know that you’d come and get me if I asked.”

“Always,” she says. 

You and Nat chat for a little longer before you end the call, citing your need to head into ‘work’ soon. You hang up, feeling better for having spoken with your best friend. 

Your improved mood lets you ponder on what Nat was trying to get at about Bucky’s intentions. Does she know something you don’t? The answer is likely yes, her being who she is and all. But if she has reason to doubt your interpretation of Bucky’s actions last night, don’t you owe it to yourself to find out for sure?

Mind made up, you send a short text to Bucky. 

Can we talk?

A few seconds pass as you type out a follow-up message, but you’re interrupted by Bucky’s text.

You’re not here. Where are you?

You smile at the realization that Bucky had to have sprinted to your room, saw your empty bed, and then searched the entire house in record time before sending his text.

Your stomach fills with anticipatory nervousness, but you remind yourself that you’ve already gone through hell without Bucky once, so if there’s something in the way of being in each other’s lives you need to clear it up.

I’m getting an early start at work. I’ll call you during lunch?

Please. 

***

The morning rushes by in a blur. Your tasks take you up, down, and around areas of the HYDRA facility you’ve never had access to before. You can’t be seen lingering around any certain area, but you take every opportunity to peek inside rooms and hallways when no one else is around. 

There’s one particular hallway that catches your attention – not because there’s any screaming or moaning coming from the cells along the walls, but because there is a steady beep, beep, beeping coming from multiple heart rate monitors. 

You’re unable to investigate since a scientist with dark hair stands at one of the open cells at the end of the hall. His clipboard hangs down at his side as his other hand rests on the doorjamb as he watches whatever is happening inside. He’s too far away for you to get a good look at him, but his height and build seem… familiar. You stare for long seconds as he continues to linger, wracking your brain for how you recognize him, but footsteps down your hallway cause the man to startle and scurry away in the opposite direction.

The person who scared the man away rounds the corner towards you. You recognize them as the scientist that had sent you down here in the first place. Quickening your pace, you rush over to them.

“Hello, sir. Here are the materials you requested.”

“Yes, quite,” the man says as he takes the samples from your hands. 

He riffles through the sealed bags and paper work, a concentrated look on his face. You stand politely next to him, your hands folded in front of you while you wait for a dismissal.

“Argh!” the scientist exclaims in anger. “That absolute buffoon! She can’t even label correctly.” He looks up and pins you with a cold stare. “You. Go collect the bloodwork – and do it correctly!” 

He shoves a piece of paper with the subject’s ID number and location into your chest. You reach up quickly to catch it and bow your head in deference. “Yes, sir. Right away.”

He storms off, stomping his way to presumably berate the poor technician who collected the samples the first time. 

You sigh, glancing down at your phone. It’s well-past lunchtime and you need to call Bucky, but this task needs to be completed first. You’ll call Bucky soon and hopefully he’ll apologize and clear everything up. The anxiety from this morning returns and causes your stomach to tighten and a lump to form in your throat.

It’s okay, you tell yourself. He’s been trying to apologize since it happened. If he confesses the reason behind why he got weirdly jealous last night, you will tell him that he has no reason to be – that there hasn’t been anyone for him to be jealous over. Especially not a civilian during an undercover mission. 

Would that be too much? Would he think that if you haven’t been with anyone since you left that you’re still hung up on him? Even though you told him you’d never actually loved him (a massive, bald-faced lie), would he still accept your words at face value even when your actions contradict them?

Why did he say all that last night? 

If he doesn’t want to have any kind of intimacy with you, why’d he suggest being friends with benefits again? Did he suggest being friends with benefits again? It certainly seemed like that was what he was implying, but Nat’s words from this morning makes you doubt your assumption. 

If he wasn’t talking about reverting back to your situationship that you both clearly regretted – for different reasons – then what?

Ugh, you sigh. This is too much. You’ll figure it out when you call him.

You find the medical supply closet and collect the needles, tourniquets, vials, and labels necessary for the samples. Looking down the list, you see that the location is actually the hallway you were interested in earlier. Gathering your supplies onto a cart, you head out.

***

You’ve collected two of the samples when you run into Olaf, the contact you last spoke with when you first arrived. You had just left Subject #268’s room and nearly ran right into the man.

“Oh, hello,” you greet sincerely before registering the wild look in his eyes and his bloodless face. “What’s wrong?”

Olaf shoves you back into the room and looks around frantically. “I need to go,” he states, frightened. “I need to leave and I have to take my family with me.”

“Woah, woah, woah,” you murmur, setting your hand on his shoulder. “Deep breaths.” You show him an exaggerated inhale and exhale, staring into his eyes and trying to calm him down. “Tell me what’s going on.”

The breathing exercise does nothing for him. Olaf grabs your hand and squeezes hard. “They know.”

“They know?” you question. “Who knows what?”

“They know that I contacted the Avengers!” He nearly shouts. You shush him with your other hand over his mouth, but he rips it away and continues. “They know I brought you here and that we’re trying to shut this place down.”

“Hold up,” you plead. Your heart races in your chest at the implications. “Why do you say that?”

“I heard them!” he rasps. “I heard them discussing the ‘rats in the organization’ and that they’re finally ready to get rid of them.”

“And you think that’s us? Why?”

“Why else would they mention my name and the Avengers in the same sentence moments later?!” Tears leak down Olaf’s face and his breaths heave in and out of his chest.

“Okay. Okay,” you say, a million thoughts and plans running through your mind. “Get out of here. Go get your family and run – it doesn’t matter if you look suspicious since they’re already aware of the situation.”

Olaf nods his head rapidly and starts to back out of the door and into the hall. “What about you?” he questions weakly.

“Don’t worry about it,” you say. “I’ll wrap things up here. Just go!”

He nods again and turns to run down the hall, but stops dead in his tracks. A horrible, gut-wrenching feeling invades you. You step out into the hallway and find…

“Petre?” you whisper.

Petre stands there, with his dark hair and clipboard – he’s the one you saw in this hallway earlier. Your brain short-circuits while trying to put all the information together. 

You hear Olar whimper behind you. You turn your head and mutter quickly: “Go.” Olaf bolts down the hallway and out of sight.

You turn back to face Petre, his eyes wide and breathing heavy.

“What are you doing here?” you ask him. “How much did you just hear?”

Petre hesitates for a moment before responding. “Enough.”

“Petre,” your voice is hard. “What are you doing here?”

“They…” his lip quivers. “They have my sister.”

Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck. “They have Sasha? I thought she was just sick?”

“She is,” he says. “They said that they’re the only ones who can cure her, so my parents… we agreed to their treatment plan. But then they started asking for more and more things – things mother and father weren’t comfortable with. But they said we have to comply if we want Sasha to get better – so I came here at their demand.”

You suck in a deep breath. Something about Petre’s broken, dejected demeanor sends a wave of foreboding through you. “Grab Sasha and run, Petre. You know who I am now. I can help you.”

Petre shakes his head sadly. “She’ll die.”

“No. No, Dr. Cho can figure out what’s wrong – she can help Sasha.” But Petre’s head continues to shake.

“They give her something everyday, something that will kill her if she doesn’t receive her next dose at the correct time. I… I’m sorry. I have to protect my sister.”

A tear slips down Petre’s cheek as he begins to back away from you.

“Petre, please,” you beg. “Give me five minutes.”

“I can’t,” he whispers, and takes off.

You curse and start running. The only thing you can do is get to the control room and wreak havoc. You thunder through the hallways of the compound, dodging scientists and slamming and locking the doors that separate different wings from each other. 

The lights shut off. A loud, blaring siren rings through the facility and emergency lights flash red. On, off. On, off. Your eyes try to adjust to the darkness, then are assaulted by the light only fractions of a second later – the strobing effect causing the scene to look like stop-motion animation. 

You recognize the area you’re in, realizing that the control room is only a few doors away. Shouting and the clambering of combat boots to your left catches your attention. A whole host of agents run towards you, weapons drawn. 

You put on a burst of speed, grabbing the control room door jamb and swinging inside. You close the door and drag a desk to barricade it – it won’t hold for long, but it’s better than nothing. You turn to find several men rising from their desks, startled looks on their faces.

Grimacing, you begin the arduous task of taking lives.

Tag list: @jackiehollanderr @rabbitrabbit12321 @12345sebby @blackwood-bodecker-housewife @lauraashley93 @themorningsunshine @happinessinthebeing @nash-dara @calwitch @stany0url0calwh0res111 @pono-pura-vida @learisa @introverbatim @kentokaze @marvelogic @kaz11283 @terry2227

Part 11

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x y/n #bucky fanfic #sorry i love you

[burntheedges-updates]

Over Again - main post & chapter list

This is my updates-only blog! Follow me at @burntheedges

Joel Miller x f!reader

summary: you fell in love with Joel Miller in Austin, Texas, in 2001, but you thought you lost him and your whole family in 2003 when the world turned upside down. now it's 2024, and you find the surprise of your life waiting for you in Jackson, Wyoming.

or, five times you and Joel fell deeper in love, on both sides of the apocalypse (and one time you did something about it)

18+ minors DNI

key themes: alternating timeline (2000-2003 / 2023-2024), 90s/00s country and latin music and dancing, romance, family vibes series tags/warnings: fluff, flirting, banter, romance, light angst (plus the angst of thinking the other person is dead for 20 years, aka the TLOU norm), pet names (darlin’, baby, honey, pretty girl), small age difference (reader is 26, Joel is 32/almost 33 when they meet in 2000), no use of y/n, teacher!reader (with vague details), smut (I'll update specific warnings for each chapter, but just FYI for later chapters: Joel calls reader a good girl, neck grabbing (no breath play), a bit of manhandling and spitting, a lot of sex) (feel free to dm any specific questions) a/n about reader: I've paid a lot of attention to how the reader is described in this fic. I've avoided skin color, hair type, body shape/size descriptions, and even clothing (except for one or two spots where you are specifically wearing jeans and boots). You are vaguely shorter than Joel. He does not run his fingers through your hair, and you feel the blood rush to your face or your face heat, but you don't turn red or pink. Please tell me if you notice anything I missed - I want this to be as inclusive as possible. a/n: this is the first fic I've written in almost 20 years. this man, I swear. wordcount: 42.6k

This fic is completely finished and posted! Chapter links under the cut.

Read it on ao3

Bonus: Mix CD (plot related) & series playlist, with headcanons: here.

Chapter List

Five times you and Joel fell deeper in love…

Chapter 1 - Meet Cute - Jackson, Early Winter 2023 | Austin, Summer 2000

Chapter 2 - Breaking the Ice - Jackson, Spring 2024 | Austin, Spring 2001

Chapter 3 - Dinner - Jackson, Spring 2024 | Austin, Spring 2001

Chapter 4 - First Date - Jackson, Spring 2024 | Austin, Spring 2001

Chapter 5 - Staying Over - Boston, September 26, 2003 | Jackson, Spring 2024

… and one time you did something about it.

Epilogue: Together - Austin, December 2002 | Jackson, Early Fall 2024

Outtakes and Snippets

Canned Heat (Austin, October, 2001)

Preview/sneak peeks: fic preview | ch 2 | ch 3 | ch 4 | ch 5

#joel miller x f!reader #joel miller x reader #joel miller fic #joel miller fanfiction #tlou fic #tlou fanfiction #x reader

[daisies-daydreams]

Office Hours - Chapter 5 (Professor!Miguel O'Hara x F!College-Student!Reader)

Pairing: Professor!Miguel O'Hara x F!College-Student!Reader Category: ANGST (you have been warned) Warnings: Near-death experiences, depictions of hypothermia, descriptions of hospitals, swearing, relationship conflicts, deceased minor characters Word Count: 1.9k+

Summary: You find Miguel nearly frozen to death in a graveyard during one of your daily runs. The truth is revealed.

A/N: This one’s pretty heavy, just a warning. Next chapter will have a bit of comfort, though.

Ch. 4 <- -> Ch. 6

MINORS/AGELESS BLOGS DNI

“Today’s class has been canceled. Please use this time to catch up on your Modules.

-Professor O’Hara

4:03 AM”

Your brows furrowed as you scanned your phone over and over again. Your cereal had grown soggy by the time Gwen stepped out of her room.

“You okay?” Gwen asked as she peeked into the kitchen. You looked up, a knot starting to twist and tighten inside your stomach.

“Yeah...I think so,” you sighed as you slid your phone into your pocket. Gwen leaned on the doorframe.

“Well, either you are or you’re not,” she said. You shrugged and finished tying your running shoes.

“Physics class was canceled today,” you said. Your roommate pursed her lips.

“Well, at least you get an extra day of Thanksgiving break, right?” Gwen hummed. You shrugged.

“I guess so,” you muttered. Your roommate frowned as she walked over and placed a hand on your shoulder.

“What’s going on, sis?” Gwen asked, her bright, blue eyes glowing softly. You glanced up, a weary frown etched onto your face.

“Don’t know. I think it’s just November blues,” you said as you gazed at your feet. Your roommate nodded and patted your shoulder.

“Yeah, they’ve been hitting me pretty bad this year, too. If you need anything, I’m here for you,” she smiled. You gave her a small grin before zipping up your jacket. You pulled out your headphones as you walked towards the front door.

“Hey wait!” Gwen called. She nearly body slammed you into the door as she flung a coat around you. “There’s a wind chill advisory today,” she explained as she adjusted the coat over your shoulders. You gave a small smile as you pulled the coat over yourself.

“Thanks, mom,” you grinned. Gwen chuckled and playfully punched your arm.

“‘Course,” she said with a wink. You decided to grab a hat and some gloves from the closet before taking your leave. “Oh, and don’t forget you’re welcome to come over tomorrow. It should just be my dad, Hobie and I,” your roommate grinned.

“Thank you,” you said with a small smile. “I shouldn’t be gone too long. I’ll just run to the graveyard and back,” you added.

“Sounds good. Oh, and don’t forget tonight’s girls night!” Gwen chirped. You gave a short nod before stepping out into the hall and out the back door.

You immediately shivered, the cold wind slicing through you like a knife. A part of you screamed to slink back inside and curl up under your covers, yet you pulled your hat down and started your light jog. You wouldn’t run as long as you usually would-you couldn’t allow yourself to freeze to death and leave your roomie by herself.

The rolling gray clouds above you angrily darkened and swirled as your feet thudded against the pavement. You passed by a few people here and there, most of them scurrying to get indoors as quickly as possible. Relief filled you as you saw the cemetery ahead, always the half-point of your daily jog. Your breath fogged up as you made your way down the road, the pavement slick against the bottom of your shoes. Just as you went to turn the corner, you spotted someone out of the corner of your eye.

A large man was kneeling in front of two similar tombstones, a set of lilies being crushed inside his clenched fist. He definitely wasn’t dressed for the weather: his only clothes being jeans and a dark, long sleeved shirt. You slowed your pace as you eyed the man, his stature somewhat familiar…

Your eyes widened.

“Miguel?” you breathed. The man remained still as if his body were frozen to the dead grass. Dread settled into the pit of your stomach as you rushed forward, your feet barely touching the ground. You panted as you approached him, your heart breaking at the sounds of incoherent mumbling and quiet sniffs. You reached your hand out and placed it on his shoulder.

“Miguel? Miguel, can you hear me?” you asked frantically. His wet, puffy eyes just barely flicked over to you. Miguel’s face softened.

“Mari...it’s you…” he said with a relieved smile. Suddenly, his massive body crumbled to the ground with a heavy thud. You gasped and instantly cupped his pale face.

“Miguel?!” you screamed.

———

You clenched and unclenched your hands as you watched the paramedics quickly rush Miguel through the double doors of the ER. They arrived just in time, carefully pulling him onto a stretcher. You hesitated when one of them asked if you wanted to ride up front the in ambulance...but you didn't want to leave Miguel alone. Not after the state you found him in.

Your professor groaned as he cracked his eyes open.

“Mari?” he asked with a dazed expression. You frowned as tears welled in your eyes. “It’s you, it’s really you,” Miguel croaked as he tried to reach for your hand. Your bottom lip trembled as your heart felt like it was crumbling from his hopeful gaze.

“You can come in,” one of the medical staff said. You blinked as you watched them wheel his shivering body into a vacant room.

“Body temperature is 89.9,” you heard one of the nurses say, their voice muffled. You kept your hands against your mouth as you sank into a chair, your head spinning as you blankly stared at the wall in front of you. Medical staff came and went as they proceeded to reheat Miguel’s frigid body, bringing in blankets and IVs.

You felt like it’s only been minutes despite the sun having dipped past the city skyline long ago. You snapped your head up when you heard someone step into the room. A man with sandy blonde hair and thick glasses came up to Miguel, a nurse following behind him. You noticed how one of his sleeves seemed much more loose than the other.

“Sorry, ma’am. Didn’t mean to wake you,” the man said in a hushed voice. You yawned and shook your head.

“It’s okay,” you sighed. Your eyes softened as you saw Miguel resting in the bed, his large chest rising and falling as his eyes flicked beneath his eyelids.

“He’ll be alright,” the doctor assured you. He gave a warm smile before pushing up his glasses with his hand. “I’m Doctor Connors,” the man said as he held his one hand out. You took it and shook it gingerly before letting your hand limply fall to your side. A low rumble reverberated through the room.

"Are you hungry?" Doctor Connors suddenly asked. You rested your hand over your gurgling stomach and nodded slowly. The doctor hummed.

"There's a café just down the hall. They have a lovely grilled cheese and soup," he suggested with a warm smile. You nodded.

"Okay, thank you," you replied as you rose to your feet. The doctor nodded in reply before turning back to his patient. Your body felt heavier with each step as you trudged towards the café. Words tumbled from your mouth yet you could barely hear them. Your phone buzzed incessantly as you waited for your food.

Your throat tightened when you saw Gwen's face light up on your screen. You clenched your other hand as you took a deep breath.

"Hey Gwen!" you said in a strained, chipper tone. You heard her sigh with relief.

"Thank God you finally answered! I was about to send out a search party," your roommate exclaimed.

"One grilled cheese and noodle soup!" the waitress called from the counter. You gave a polite smile as you took your piping hot meal, tilting your head down and sinching your phone between your ear and shoulder. You heard some shuffling and laughing in the background. Your eyes widened as you set your tray down.

"Are you already at girl's night?" you asked, your perception of time completely warped. Gwen hummed a "mhm".

"(Y/N)...where the hell are you?" she stressed with a harsh whisper. Your lips tightened as your stomach curled into a knot. You swallowed.

"I'm...I'm out with a friend," you explained quickly. You could feel the eyebrow raise on the other end of the phone. "It's a long story. I'll just Uber home," you said as you stirred your spoon in your soup.

"You sure? Traffic's hella bad today," Gwen replied.

"Traffic's always bad-it's New York," you said. Your roommate chuckled.

"Touché," she said. You watched the steam roll and billow off of your noodle soup as you leaned back in your chair.

"Alright. See you later," you said.

"Later sis," Gwen replied. Your heart sank a little as silence filled the space between your ear and your phone. You set it down before scarfing down your meal. The food tasted like paper to you, each bite more bland than the last. Patients and staff wandered up and down the halls as you emptied your plate. You sighed as you tossed your trash into the bin before making your way back to Miguel's room. You paused when you heard some sniffling from inside the room.

"Gabe…I-I fucked up," you heard Miguel croak. You froze next to the doorway as you heard him nearly choke on a sob. You peeked a little past the doorframe and watched as he ran his hand through his messy, dark locks as he parted his lips.

"I don't know what to do-you're the only person I can talk to about this," he trembled. You held your breath as you lingered near the doorframe. Miguel glanced around before cupping his hand to the side of his mouth.

"I-I started sleeping with one of my students," he confessed. Gabe screamed on the other end, causing Miguel to pull his head away. "¡Cállate!" he shouted before coughing into the crook of his elbow [Shut up!]. Your heart raced as you tried to steady your breathing. Who was Gabe? And why the fuck was Miguel telling him everything!?

Your train of thought was broken when heard your professor sigh heavily.

"She's so much like her, Gabe. Her smile, her laugh...the way her heart just shines," Miguel sniffed. He rubbed his temple and squeezed his eyes shut.

"I-I thought I could just imagine I was with Mari w-when we were..." he choked. Your jaw dropped as you felt your blood run ice cold.

"Oh God...what have I done?" he breathed. "What have I done?" Miguel sobbed. The room spun you as you braced yourself against the wall. You took a step back as you felt your heart tearing apart thread by thread.

"Todo es mi culpa," he said with a shaky breath [Everything is my fault]. You frowned and clutched your chest, your hands trembling. "I-I should've been the one to take her!" he yelled. You flinched and jumped back. "If I took Gabi to the play instead of Mari...i-if I didn’t work overtime…then..." he trailed off before folding his head into his forearm.

"Oh Gabi...Mari...perdóname," he wept [Oh Gabi...Mari...forgive me].

Hot stream down your cheeks as you kept your hand over your mouth, your mind violently tossing and turning in every direction. You gasped when you turned and almost ran into one of the nurses.

“Are you okay, ma’am?” the older woman asked. You simply shook your head before glancing over. Miguel’s dark eyes were wide, his face drained of all color as the two of you locked eyes. You turned back to the nurse, your eyes red and glossy as you sucked in a sharp breath. “I…I have to go,” you stammered before quickly taking off down the hallway.

----

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