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nighhtwing · 2 days

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one day i will write a time travel au where bruce finds himself back in time when his parents are alive and bruce has always thought his father was a giant when he was younger and attributes that to thomas dying when bruce was still a child but then he meets his young parents and thomas still has a few inches on bruce even when bruce has a decade (or two) on thomas and still feeling like a child in his father’s eyes and wanting to die about it… compound that with bruce being so much taller than his mom and wanting to die about it because he feels old and worn down by time and grief and his mom is so young when he thought she was as giant as his father… banging my head against a wall exploding into a million pieces etc etc

#comics #dc #bruce wayne #thomas wayne #martha wayne #the waynes #text #tais toi lys #alternatively. would LOVE. to write dick meeting thomas and martha

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going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi · 22 days

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I like to imagine there's one random stats teacher in gotham who looked at when bruce wayne goes on vacation vs when batman gets injured, and when the wayne kids are at galas vs when the bats miss a night of patrol. . . and just thought "hm. not my problem."

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escapismisaddicting · 5 months

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You know that thing where we’re like “Joker shouldn’t have a backstory” because it ruins the mystery and whatnot? That but with Alfred.

Screw all the comics telling us that he’s an ex-intelligence officer or that he’s just a regular guy that got promoted to being a butler. I want Alfred to basically be a cryptid. He just kinda showed up one day and the Waynes rolled with it. One time when Bruce’s parents were still alive he asked them how they met Alfred. And they were just like; “…That’s a good question.”

And whenever Alfred is asked he always comes up with the most absurd lies.

“Oh, yes Master Bruce, I met your parents after a blood ritual gone wrong and now I am forced to serve this family forever.”

“I was an assassin sent to kill your parents and pilfer their riches but alas I grew to attached to them and their adorable little rascal of a son.”

“I tripped and fell from the heavens because of how distraught I was at your Father’s complete and utter lack of self-preservation”

And the Batkids will sometimes try to get the truth out of him but give up pretty quickly. Except Tim. Tim seems to have figured it out. That’s gotta be why both of them have seemingly stayed the same age all this time.

#batman #dc #batfamily #alfred pennyworth #batfam #bruce wayne #martha wayne #thomas wayne #the wayne family #the waynes #cryptid alfred pennyworth #cryptid tim drake #cryptid batfam #tim drake #forever 17 tim drake #headcanon #heartcanon

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shyjusticewarrior · 9 months

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"Wayne kid" is probably the Gotham City version of "Florida man"

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mylifeingotham · 3 months

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bruciemilf · 1 month

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Okay but Duke can canonically see ghosts—or at least them to a certain extent. So imagine that as he ages so does his powers, and that includes this ability.

Duke, walking into the kitchen early in the morning one day:

Thomas and Martha Wayne, who both look very real and very see through, having a heated debate about family recipes:

Duke, immediately turning around to go back to bed:

I actually adore the theory of murdered ghosts having to roam around their resting ground until their killer is brought to justice, so, Thomas and Martha being one with Wayne manor? With Gotham in general?

Uhh, YES PLEASE.

Patron saints of protection and guidance for the Waynes. Even if they could cross, they wouldn’t do it.

Have you seen this little family their son built? They need all the help they can get.

Duke genuinely thought they were 2 am hallucinations. When Thomas gives him pointers with Anna during lunch, he’s no longer certain it’s the case.

“C’mon, you’re my nephew! You gotta have more game than THAT. Buy her somethin’ nice. Dinner, jewelry, Russian battle axe. Y’know, lady things.”

“Uhh. I don’t think that’d work, Gramps.”

“What kinda woman doesn’t want an axe? Fine, get her a museum then. I know where Bruce keeps his credit cards, c’mon.” Yeah, everyone knows where. Bruce basically hands them out like coffee.

Martha heavily disproves of Bruce’s and Tim’s sleeping patterns and ‘encourages’ (strongarms) Duke into telling them to sleep.

Have you tried sending Batman, the Dark Knight, Vengeance himself, to nap before? It’s terrifying. Somehow? Tim is a bit scarier.

#asks #thomas wayne #martha wayne #the waynes #duke thomas #batfamily #dc comics #dc #batman #text #bruce wayne #batfam #Theyre so important to me

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audhd-nightwing · 6 months

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random wayne family shenanigans

the entire family gaslights the public into thinking tim and cass are and have always been twins. they forge birth certificates and everything

tbh this is probably canon but dick is damian’s second legal guardian after bruce. and for the period bruce is gone he’s the first and alfred is second

the kids try to convince gotham that all of bruce’s children are his biologically. people believe dick jason tim and cass but then there’s steph and duke. they still insist both of them are bruce’s bio kids. steph plays along bc she thinks it’s funny and duke just rolls his eyes whenever a reporter asks him (damian is obviously already confirmed to be bruce’s bio son)

bruce once asks tim to spread some misinformation so people get less suspicious of him when he disappears to do batman stuff. tim makes a ‘tell-all’ article about how bruce wayne and batman are secret lovers. he gets quotes from dick and babs. bruce regrets asking

when dick is first adopted he pretends not to know english so he won’t have to talk to reporters or do interviews. bruce definitely lets him bc he doesn’t want dick to be uncomfortable and the media is unrelenting otherwise. jason and damian absolutely copy this idea when they are first introduced to the public

tabloids keep accusing dick of cheating on babs until he does a interview where he says “we haven’t been dating for like a year, we decided we are better as friends and now i’m dating a guy and she’s dating a girl so…” and the media loses it. he also timed it so it’s during pride month bc he’s extra like that

they convince the public that jason’s death was faked so that he could live a normal life despite being adopted by a billionaire. it works surprisingly well. they tell everyone he left to travel the world so no one can confirm or deny where he was at any point during his “death”

(a part of the reason this is so easily accepted is that people write it off as ‘weird rich ppl shit’)

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schwadudle · 2 months

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I've had this brainrot about an batfam AU for quite some time now and I haven't had the time to write it so I just gonna share it with y'all.

So it's an AU where Thomas and Martha never die and Bruce never becomes batman but he still adopts all of his kids. Then one of his kids (preferably Jason cuz' it would be the funniest) goes in another universe for some bullshit reason and has to deal with his vigilante family.

____________________________________________

Jason: "Where are my grandparents?"

Bruce: "As in Alfred?"

Jason: "No, as in Martha and Thomas... your parents."

Bruce: "Jason, they're dead."

...

Jason: "You want to tell me that my grandparents, who are very much alive, died and turned my dad into an anti-social emo furry and made it everybody else's problem?"

Rest of the family: "Sounds about right."

#it would be so funny #hilarious #bruce wayne #batman #dc comics #batfam #jason todd #batfamily #dc #dc robin #no capes au #the waynes #alfred pennyworth #thomas wayne #martha wayne

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jaxon-exe · 1 year

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Wayne TV show

Ok so awhile ago someone (I’m sorry I don’t know who, if u know plz tell me so I can credit) came up with the idea of “what if the Waynes have a show like ‘keeping Up with the Kardashians’?”

Well I’ve been reading WFA and was thinking… what if they did have a show like that but the Wayne’s didn’t try to hide their weirdness. Like the weirdness that only comes from there nightlife.

I’m taking:

Damian keeps threatening to stab people and the crew think it’s a joke until he actually pulls out a dagger.

Dick decides the best way out of the manor is to do a flip out of a 3rd story window

Jason jokes about death (both his own and causing other people’s) a little to much

Tim full on passes out at the dinner table and Bruce just picks him up like he’s a toddler that weights next to nothing and takes him to bed

Cass has a habit of jump scaring the camera guy by just popping into existence next to them

They have a game of paintball that gets way to intense and ends up with Stephanie giving a speech that wouldn’t be amiss in a war movie

After ep 1 a lot of people talk sh/t about them online and in the next ep Barbara just random says names every now and then. It isn’t until after people work out she was saying the names of the worst people that sh/t talked them

For a long time all the viewers and crew thought Duke was the normal one until ‘the incident’

Jason and Tim are fighting and it’s getting pretty rough and bruce just spawns outta f/cking nowhere and just picks up the human tank that is Jason Todd like it’s nothing and just walks off

It becomes a running joke that whenever things go wide the camera just zooms in on Alfred, who just standing in the background calm as can be, as you can just hear the chaos continuing

Like everyone knew the Waynes were crazy but like…….. no one expected this

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rubydubydoo122 · 10 days

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How did the Waynes' funeral go down? Could it be held privat? Did they have to hold two; a private one and a public one? Were there paparazzi anyway, wether private or not, to get a picture of Bruce? Were the extended Wayne and Kane families in attendance? Was there a scandal?...

Well, their graves are on private Wayne grounds, so I would assume it was private, with the extended Wayne and Kane Family there.

Alfred was probably standing at the Gates with his shotgun.

there was also Major beef between the Waynes and Kanes about inheritance, and a massive scuffle when they realized it was going all to Bruce and various Charities. And that Bruce's legal guardian was going to be Alfred.

I bet Alfred was shell shocked.

#batman #batfam #dc comics #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #martha wayne #thomas wayne #the waynes #the kanes

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ryemiffie · 2 months

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Me and my buddy as batfam incorrect quotes:

Dick: did you just insult that mailman?

Damian: you have no proof of that.

Dick: the crying mailman would beg to differ.

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missingnightwingsmullet · 12 days

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What's your favorite bat fam comic. I'm always looking for new ones.

this is nostalgia based for me, so buckle up

one of the first bat fam comics i read is the Li’l Gotham series by Derek Fridolfs (illustrated by Dustin Nguyen)

i think it’s so cute and for me is like the comic equivalent of rewatching a childhood comfort show. the illustration style is so cute too and i think it adds to some of the funnier moments

just overall like a warm hug to me. and, is s good introduction to the dc universe as there’s a BUNCH of different characters that pop up throughout the series.

thanks for the ask!!!!

happy reading!