#I’m not sober

[oh-surprise-its-me]

Jamie got that into giving Roy a meaningful gift for a fake holiday that Phoebe made up could you imagine how much effort he puts in for Roy’s birthday

And like how far is Jamie willing to go each holiday…

Ideally someone will write a 5+ fic of this and I’ll get to cry and kick my feet over it

#ted lasso #roy x jamie #jamie tartt #roy kent #jamie tartt x roy kent #ted lasso fluff #i want him #i’m not sober #talk to me people I wanna know your thoughts #preferably homo thoughts #royjamie

[hiccupbutpurple]

Viggo barking

Does he do the lil tiny rat dog barks or big dog bark barks?

That’s why Krogan broke up with him it’s so sad he got bark at to hard

THE RIDERS ATTACKING AND VIGGO BARKS AT THEM FRIM HIS SHIP

Hiccup barks or meows back or something or he’s just like :/, Gustav would too

Snotlout has hissed so maybe he hisses

IITS DIRE STRAITS BUR VIGGO’S ANGER IS SHOWN WITH BARKING

HE BARKS FROM THE DINGY SHIP THING SOMEONE ANIMATE IT

#I’m not sober #viggo grimborn #lol the cupcakke bark bark song #rtte #httyd #vigcup #hiccup haddock

[cquirly5]

Dude I love watermelon like it’s so good it’s like someone soaked a packing peanut in water and it fucking awesome

#idk man #I’m not sober

[seytazen]

Hot Take: Yzma from the Emperors new Groove and Starscream are cut of the same flesh. Might elaborate later.

#transformers #tfp #starscream #emperors new groove #emperor kuzco #yzma #funky crossover #i’m not sober

[sublunaryorchid]

just thinkin about. the ridiculousness of gendering clothing

#for why #I’m Not Sober

[anothermansjeans]

the things i would let josh

hutcherson

#i’m not sober #but #i would say that josh hutcherson can do whatever he whets #shang #wants #;) #i watchignmockingjay part 1 rec #buf wow #;( #:) #josh hutcherson #peeta mellark #taya #yay #anne marie shut up pls :) #the hunger games

[yummylet]

Low key what if I just started screaming at my therapy session rn

#hi #therapy #idk what’s happening #I’m not sober

[all-that-glitters-is-goldfish]

Bestie I am losing my shit over this tag 😭

The octopussy complex from that Greek myth where the octopus was in love with his mom or something!!!

#morgan answers #AM I RIGHT #I’m not sober

[nothingtoseeherebyeexx]

james potter’s OG Hoes™️ (some of them ain’t loyal)

close ups and the sketch bc i like it a lot:

#peter was 100% drunk #he’s the type of guy that becomes another person when alcohol gets in his system #drunk peter is like sober sirius on a good day (chaos-wise) #remus was watching them like #look at these idiots…i love them #twin bitches twin bitches twin bitches hopping off a jet skiiiii #istg if the quality is shit i’m hitting tumblr w a stick #marauders era #marauders #james potter #james fleamont potter #sirius black #sirius orion black #peter pettigrew #prongs #padfoot #wormtail #fanart

[oh-surprise-its-me]

Pornstar Sladick au

Dick normally works with women switching but has been known to work with Roy. Slade works with men, and he really only likes working with sub bottoms.

Dick gets to make a film with Slade but the plot is different, Slade still tops but he’s the sub and the plot is Dick has to ‘tame the wild military man’

It goes about as well as you would expect (exceptionally well and they fall in love because I want them to and they get an even bigger audience once they get married)

#sladedick #slade wilson #dick grayson #no powers au #dc #my ao3 is recycleyourself go party over there if you wanna #pls someone do it #smut? kinda #kinda smutty #deathstroke #nightwing #headcanon #i’m not sober #as always write a fic if you wanna #I woke up and decided to make it everyone else’s problem #sladick #mac writes dc

[twinstxrs]

the way fantasy high evokes dread in me so easily should be studied because brennan describing how the bad kids are going to save the world again only to go back to school in three days and have to work just as hard for no reward made me so instantly stressed. combined with how tired fig & gorgug are in the promo for next week talking about school… yea. fantasy high my beloved so happy to be back!!

#fantasy high #dimension 20 #fantasy high junior year #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #fig faeth #gorgug thistlespring #maybe i’m just anxious as a person but it was so immediatrly sobering like jesus #*immediately #they’re all just sooo fucking tired in that promo my god

[kittenwhiskuhz]

surely, not slowly, losing my fucking marbles.

#surely #losing my marbles #addiction #i’m not sober

[bendydudeinc]

UGHHHHHHHH I want Chūyas hands. His pretty hands. I want to watch his eyes grow hooded and dark with lust as he slowly brings his gloved fingers to his lips and bites his glove off one finger at a time because he knows it gets me hot and bothered. I want Chūya to circle his fingers around the outside of my dripping hole as I squirm and cry for him to put them in. I don’t think he’d last long with that after seeing my folds clench around nothing. I want him to relentlessly thrust into me with his fingers to the beat of our favorite songs, smiling smugly to himself like the stupid sexy asshole he is as he keeps scissoring and thrusting against my most sensitive spots to the rhythm, even as my eyes roll back and I babble that it’s too much during a fast pace song, he’ll just curl his fingers harder to shut me up. I want Chūya to talk down to me like the filthy whore I am and humiliate me when I cry out and gush around his fingers for the god knows what time since he put the playlist on shuffle because godammit it’s just so fucking good.

DID I MENTION HED TOTALLY USE HIS GRAVITY TO KEEP GOING LONG AFTER HE GETS TIRED AND HIT EVERY BEAT?? AGHAHHSH

#bungou stray dogs chuuya #chuuya nakahara #I’m not sober this isn’t proof read #chuuya smut #nakahara chūya #bsd chūya #chūya #lol sorry #bungo stray dogs

[virgothozul]

need sleep but haven’t drawn them in a hot minute.

#Caejose #watch me. In a couple hours. Wanting to unpost this after I sober up from my artistic blindness. #That’s fine I’m too tired anyways

[morganski-19]

Things I Won't Say When I'm Sober

inspired by this post by @imfinereallyy. I saw this post ages ago but literally just found this idea in my drafts and decided to finally write it,

part 2

Steve lies across the floor of Eddie’s new trailer, mind hazy, with Robin’s limbs haphazardly laying on him. He’s mindlessly running his hands along the carpet, feeling the soft fiber under his hand. Eddie’s hand reaches into his vision as he passes Steve the joint. He really doesn’t need to take anymore, his muscles already relaxed more than they have been in a while, and his mind is slipping into that territory that might give him a panic attack if he goes too far. But he’s with people he trusts and Robin will cut him off before any of that happens, if he won’t cut himself off before then. 

He blows the smoke up into the air as Eddie takes back the joint. Running his hand across the carpet again, he brushes against something different. Curious, he starts playing with it, rolling it between his fingers, tugging on it a bit to see if he can tell what it is. 

“Stevie,” Eddie slurs. Steve hums. “Why are you playing with my hair?”

Steve’s eyebrows furrow. “This is your hair?” He tugs on the strand between his fingers a bit. 

“Yes, and I'd appreciate it if you’d stop pulling on it.”

“It’s so soft,” Steve finds himself saying, not dropping the hair between his fingers, instead picking up more.

Robin bursts out laughing. “How high are you, dingus?”

Steve shrugs. “Pretty high I guess.”

“Could you stop playing with my hair?” Eddie complains, rolling away a bit and almost kicking Steve in the face. 

He moves his hand away from Eddie’s hair and brings it up behind his head. Robin shifts, rolling off of Steve and starting to stand up.

“Where are you going?” Steve complains, needy.

“The bathroom,” Robin deadpans. “Why?”

The giggles kick in and Steve struggles to get the words out. “Cause I have a secret and I need to tell you it.”

The secret in question was Steve’s crush on Eddie. Something he’s buried deeper than he’s willing to admit and something that he’s barely come to accept. But something about the safe feeling of his friends and the weed loosening his thoughts to stop the denial and face the facts made him want to tell her. It’s not the first time that he’s thought that his attraction to Eddie was a fact and not just the desire to be friends. That it wasn’t normal for people to fantasize about kissing their best friends and sharing the same bed all the time. 

It took time for Steve to realize that these thoughts were ok for him to have. That he could have feelings for girls in the past while also having feelings for a boy now. That it’s ok for him to be having feelings for a boy at all. He is who he is, and who he likes won’t change that. The Steve he was when he dated girls isn’t different from the Steve who has a crush on a boy. It’s all him, even if he didn’t know he was capable of doing it. 

The main problem was that he hadn’t told Robin about it yet, and it seems that his hazy mind decided that now was the best time. Now, when Eddie, the person he has a crush on, is still in the room.

“And this secret is hilarious?” Robin joins in on the giggles but tries to hide it. “Can you tell me the secret so I can go to the bathroom?”

Steve shakes his head while giggling more, now realizing his mistake and thinking it’s hilarious rather than embarrassing. “No.”

Robin rolls her eyes. “No?” 

“Mhm. Can’t tell you.”

“So you have a secret that you need to tell me but can’t tell me. Why is that, Steven?” Robin very annoyingly asks, only pulling out the full name when she wants him to get to the point. 

“Eddie’s in the room,” Steve says like it’s the simplest fact there is. 

Eddie sits up. “Why can’t I know your secret?”

“Cause it’s a Robin secret. You don’t get to know those.”

Robin rolls her eyes again while Eddie makes an overexaggerated offended look. “I’m going to the bathroom, you two can figure this out while I’m gone.” 

Steve stops his giggles to roll over and grab at Robin’s legs as she gets up, attempting to stop her from leaving. She steps out of his grasp and makes her way out of the room. He lays there pouting for a second before bursting out in laughter again. 

“So keeping secrets from me is so funny now isn’t it,” Eddie pouts. 

“I am so high,” he manages to get out between giggles as he rolls back onto his back. 

Eddie rolls his eyes before laying down next to him, their heads next to each other this time. “Yeah, I can tell. You don’t normally laugh this much when you’re not.” 

The weed is doing nothing to stop the blush that covers Steve’s face, though his face was plenty red before so maybe it would hide it. “You notice that about me?”

“I notice a lot of things about you, Steve,” Eddie responds sincerely, turning his head to look Steve in the eyes. 

Maybe it’s the high, maybe it isn’t, but Steve can’t help but think that the look Eddie has in his eyes is the same one that he finds himself getting every time he looks at Eddie. The simple want of something more that can never be. To be more than all that they are, friends. 

A look that tells Steve that if he leaned in for a moment, maybe Eddie wouldn’t back away. Maybe he would let it happen. Maybe he would lean in too. Maybe all of the things Steve has accepted that he wants could come true. 

Not that he would even try right now. He’s high, Eddie’s high. No person’s first kiss with someone they really care about should be like this. It should be in a state where they could remember it. Where they could look back on it in the future and remember every detail. Or maybe it should be done when he’s a little bit high. Maybe then he won’t second guess himself at the last minute and actually go through with it. Then if it ends badly, he has the chance of forgetting the little details but is left with the knowledge that this is hopeless. Then he can get over it. 

He has the feeling that getting over Eddie would be hard though. The feelings that bubble over in his chest every time he’s around Eddie are all but proof of that. This is different, more than he’s felt about someone in a long time. The most he’s felt about a person since Nancy. 

That scares him, still scares him. That he can look at another person the way he looked at her. Or more, he can feel something for someone on that level again, but this time completely differently. He likes Eddie for different reasons then he liked Nancy, but it doesn’t change the way he feels about him. This affection, this crush, this almost love is deep. Steve doesn’t want to mess it up this time. 

“I’m not that offended that you won’t tell me you’re secret,” Eddie whispers, like this moment isn’t meant to be heard even though they’re the only ones in the room. “I know that you and Robin share pretty much everything. So if it’s meant for her ears only I understand. I just hope you might be able to tell me one day.”

“Eddie, I-” Steve stammers, cut off by the sound of Robin entering the room again. 

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #robin buckley #stranger things #ficlet #cw: smoking #angst #getting together #but not yet #pining #things i wont say when i’m sober #cw smoking

[chrollohearttags]

and what if I just start pairing people together who ain’t got no business being together for the fuck if it? Like why is Connie, the mall jeweler and Sukuna who works at the shoe store wind up being best friends and spitting game on (y/n). They have a contest to see who she ends up hooking up with. But she picks both. Or Chrollo and Eren being rival adult content creators who get compared to each other all the time end up both developing a crush on the new girl taking over the internet and both pine for her and ultimately take turns until she says who’s better—

#swear I’m not high #just stupid as fuck #doing all of this shit sober 24/7 #cherry chats 🍒 #s/o to the gc for that last pairing #it’s been rent free in my head for two days now sjdjdg #black reader #I don’t need to write any of these #just talking out my asshole fr