so average-mako-enjoyer made this post about Shepard being forced to have a social media account for morale and only posting hamster pictures and like
I read that and immediately had four different Shepards yelling at me in my head (I blame @shadoedseptmbr's Aedan tags) 🤣🤣🤣
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Weaver would in fact include hamster pictures, but they'd be macro pictures of like, whiskers and toes only.
The whole account would all only be macro photos. No tags, no comments, no explanations, no definitions. No time stamps or metadata, all expertly wiped, no location cues beyond maybe the quality of the light... which isn't that hard to manipulate after all, if you've got an omnitool and some good flashlight/spotlight blueprints.
It's all just exquisite close-ups of pieces of gravel and seeds and leaves and pollen or fractions of circuit boards and weird screws or clamps or the odd pattern of wear on a [redacted but clearly the Mako for those in the know] tire.
She and Aeden would clearly get along great.
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Ngaio would flat out refuse. (She would've done it if she'd met Traynor sooner, because she can refuse Traynor nothing, but that was too late, on several levels.)
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Ella would be asked to make an account after she gets her N7 status and starts showing up in the news periodically; she's told to try and soften the public image of the infamous Butcher of Torfan.
She does set something up, posts some generic pretty Alliance Training Stock Photos, the kind you get in a recruiters office, but that's it for ages.
And then she posts five separate in-depth tutorials in a row, three on astronomy and two on France of all things, one specifically about the language, one about cooking.
Then nothing again.
And then a three-part series on astral navigation, and how different species figured out the math for measuring where the fuck they were in space.
Then a thing on baking with chocolate, including how to convert levo recipes to dextro (and vice versa) and which things were more likely to translate into something that might still taste good.
She never shows herself however, so it does fuck all to counter all the pics and videos of her stalking around heavily armed and armored in full gear, occasionally with a bit of a blue halo from biotics usage, generally glaring or scowling as she avoids reporters trying to get a comment.
Most people don't connect her socials to the Butcher of Torfan at all, and those that do assume someone else is running the account in her name in a failed Alliance PR stunt.
After the Battle of the Citadel, there are enough recordings of her helping with clean-up efforts and being polite at formal ceremonies to make it clear that the Butcher and the Shepard-who-goes-on-weird-tangents-on-social-media are actually the same person, who is also POSSIBLY a galactic hero, so the whispers about Torfan finally start to fade out a little...
And then she dies.
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Ward would be some terrifying (but delightful once you got past the scowl) combination of Adam Savage and Mercury Stardust because he would legit show people how to take things apart and upgrade and fix them (and which bits are 'legal-ish' depending on whether they technically own them or not) but also things probably explode sometimes (or at the very least spark A Lot™️) and Tali guests wearing glorious (flame-retardant) Turian fashions and ALSO sometimes PROPRIETARY TECH THAT IS NOT SUPPOSED TO BE PUBLIC KNOWLEDGE and no one ever bleeps ANY of Jack's swearing and sometimes the three of them are gleefully trying to make something that probably shouldn't exist and some poor Alliance PR officer cries in their office sometimes because they are actually spectacular PR and GREAT for morale and also they break so many TOS's but it's Commander Fucking Shepard so who's gonna tell him to stop?
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So hey. I distracted myself from my suffering last week via new OC!BB for @seraphinitegames' Wayhaven games now that Book 3 is out. (Have I actually even made it thru book 1 with them yet? No, because I keep restarting and making more picrews as I tweak them in my head, instead.) Meet Ellington Ruskin, they/them.
When they were young & curious & annoyed that adults seemed to think they were adorable, (and that Ellie was an acceptable nickname, which it was not) they went by their full name, Ellington. (That did absolutely nothing to counter the adorable? It did successfully dissuade any lingering attempts at Ella or Ellie tho 🥰)
[carrotkake's / nyurei's / Wervty's Murmur]
They were Much Too Tired™️ (and living off cigarettes & hair dye) when they over-did college-type-nonsense and it was too hard to hold onto all those dumb syllables and dropped it down to just Ell:
[hunbloom's / Bright's Picrew Hell / djarn's]
(Ellington has a ridiculous collection of grandmother-reading-glasses/blue-light-blockers as they are slightly farsighted and also spend way too much time on assorted computer screens.)
They can be very appealing, not so much because they've figured out "charming" (tho they're better with people than any version of @angstmongertina's poor Lia) but because if they're interested they're completely focused, on the book, the technology, the news... or the person who has caught their eye. (Though they might very well just make you feel like they're daring you to try and keep being interesting?)
[Wervty's Chime / Black Centered Picrew / KZ's dolls]
They are Very Smart & kinda too intense for small-town-life & maybe a little intimidating. Just a little!
(ok probably more than a little?)
[toon me! / lulljevic's / baydews']
Ell is not quite sure why that means everyone wants them to be in charge of things, but competency apparently cannot be denied? Ugh.
If they're gonna be forced into this job, they're going to do it well (and look good while doing it).
[sushicore! / Astrolavas' / ♡ poicon maker ♡]
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