#also I am aware I am insane you did not need to write all of that nor did I want to

[eskewcity]

Eskewcity's Top Ten Games of 2023

Hello!!! I've decided to compile a list of the best games I played this past year. As such, this list is not limited to only 2023 releases (in fact a majority of the games I played are several years old atp). Additionally, I only considered games that I had completed by year's end. This means that fantastic games such as Signalis and The Talos Principle 2 will not be included, though I still highly recommend them.

Finally, I will put my ranking under a read more for the sake of not clogging anyways dash. Hope you all had a good 2023 and maybe can find something that interests you mwah <3

10. Subway Midnight by Bubby Darkstar

Board the train! Run away from a weirdo! Solve some puzzles! Make friends with some ghosts! Try not to become a ghost yourself!

While I am not someone usually willing to gloss over a somewhat lackluster story for the sake of gorgeous visuals, I will give Subway Midnight an exception. Even with a game that largely takes place in a subway car, it was exceptional when it came to its visual design. It has a blend of a cartoonish style for the characters mixed with extremely realistic environments. The gameplay itself was also quite fun, if not tedious in multiple runs and I really enjoyed the variety of characters that players encounter.

9. Broken Reality by Dynamic Media Triad

A humorous adventure set in a 3D parody of the internet. Diverse puzzles, beautiful worlds, friends, experiences, upgrades and more, await those who 'log on'!

Depending on yourself, Broken Reality might either be a headache inducing cacophony of colors or a fun exploration game about the internet and the commercialization of products and each other. For myself, I choose to look at it from the latter perspective. I found the game to put quite humorous and I really enjoyed all the different worlds to explore. Much like Subway Midnight, I would not recommend it much on its story but I think the design and concept certainly carries where that lacks.

8. Hylics by Mason Lindroth

Hylics is a recreational program with light JRPG elements.

At its core, Hylics is a game with a pretty simple concept. Fight your way through the world with the end goal of defeating the big bad, Gibby, King of Moon. However past that, get ready for a confusing and abstract adventure. This accounts for several reasons. For one, the dialogue of Hylics consists of randomly generated sentences that feel almost coherent while maintaining a healthy amount of head scratching. The game was also created through claymation leading to characters and environments whose shapes twists and turn in perplexing patterns. While this may seem to take away from the experience, I found this not to be the case at all. In fact, I would say it enhanced my time playing greatly. I could not stop thinking about Hylics after I played it simply because its weird and purposely lacks focus which makes it all the more memorable.

7. Babbdi by Sirius & Léonard Lemaitre

BABBDI is a short, first person exploration experience with light narrative and platforming elements. Visit the town of BABBDI, a forsaken district in the outer ring of the megalopolis. Meet its inhabitants and discover how to escape.

In Babbdi, your goal is to leave Babbdi. You must search through the city to find a train ticket that can guarantee your escape. However, the ironic part of playing this game was that I did not rush to leave. While being a free-to-play game, it had an incredibly sizable area to explore. The game actively encourages the player to search every inch of city to find its secrets while also reminding the player that their goal is to eventually leave all of this behind. If you have an hour or so to spare and love games focused more on exploration than action, this is definitely one to check out!

6. Who's Lila? by Garage Heathen

A reverse-detective adventure, where you control your character's face

In Who's Lila, you play as a young man named Will who cannot properly control the expressions on his face. As the player, your job is to ensure that he reacts properly to the world around him. The game even starts with a tutorial on how to respond accordingly to a variety of situations. While a seemingly simple concept, this game is not as it may appear. In fact, and without giving much away, Who's Lila requires multiple playthroughs to order to begin to piece together what is truly going on.

5. Hypnospace Outlaw by Tendershoot

Greetings Enforcer, and thank you for enlisting in the Hypnospace Patrol Department! As the world falls into its slumber, Hypnospace becomes a bustling global village. These virtual streets aren't going to police themselves!

Taking place in 1999, Hypnospace Outlaw tasks you as a moderator for a new form of technology which allows users to surf the internet in their sleep. As the player, you're tasked with seeking out policy violations and handing out warnings and even banning users, if necessary. There is so much about this game I can say but I find going in blind is the best. I definitely found some frustrations which some of the puzzles and how obtuse their solutions were but its undeniably one of the most unique games I have ever played.

4. Return of the Obra Dinn by Lucas Pope

Return of the Obra Dinn is a first-person mystery adventure based on exploration and logical deduction.

In Return of the Obra Dinn, is a mystery game where you not only have to determine the fates of one person, but an entire ship's crew. Additionally, you have to determine the names of each individual based on existing records. By going in the past to witness the last moments of each individual, players can be able to slowly work out the mystery of the Obra Dinn. As someone who plays many puzzle games, I found this to be one of the most satisfying I've ever played. I also thought the game just looked gorgeous and was extremely fitting for the vibe it was going with.

3. Papers Please by Lucas Pope

Congratulations. The October labor lottery is complete. Your name was pulled. For immediate placement, report to the Ministry of Admission at Grestin Border Checkpoint. An apartment will be provided for you and your family in East Grestin. Expect a Class-8 dwelling.

As a border patrol officer, your job is determine the legitimacy of the documents that are brought to you by people wishing to enter the country of Arstotzka. This requires things such checking if their paperwork has expired, if they match their passport photo and if they have the necessary seals for entry. However, what if someone comes to the border fearing for their safety if they are denied, without the correct paperwork? Will you let them in, risking punishment for yourself or deny them, ensuring that you will able to provide for your family at home? Papers Please is a game that will continuously make you question your own ethics under a authoritarian regime. I found this game to be incredibly emotional and made me replay several days simply because I decided against my initial judgments. Certainly one of the most impactful games I played this year.

2. Presentable Liberty by Wertpol

You have been imprisoned without being told why. All you can hear day in day out is the faint ticking of a clock in your cell. That is, until the first of 5 fateful days begins.

Sometimes there are short indie games in the world that fundamentally change you and this is one of them for me. With that in mind, there is not much I want to say about Presentable Liberty since I find its best experienced blind. The short of it is you play as a prisoner as they receive letters from those on the outside. The gameplay is minimal since the player is stuck in their cell for the majority of the game but promise you when I say it does not much that action when its biggest strength comes from its writing. While this game had its short lived success on Youtube, I implore everyone out there to play it and see why I choose to rank it this high on the list.

1. Cry of Fear by Team Psykskallar

Cry of Fear is a psychological single-player and co-op horror game set in a deserted town filled with horrific creatures and nightmarish delusions. You play as a young man desperately searching for answers in the cold Scandinavian night, finding his way through the city as he slowly descends into madness.

Honestly, it's insane it took me so long to play this game especially when loving a piece of media that's a psychological horror featuring a depressed character wandering a city is kind of what I'm known for. However, I finally got around to it and I'm so glad I did. While not the most technically savvy game out there, it is incredible what Team Psykskallar managed to pull off while offering players the opportunity to experience the entire thing for free. Several times throughout playing Cry of Fear I couldn't stop thinking how much better it was than many of the games I've paid for. Like I said, its definitely not the most polished horror game out for sure but damn was I charmed. Even after I completed this game, I immediately had to restart so I could play with director's commentary as I was just that damn interested in learning about as much of this game's development as I could. And its because of how invested I got in playing this game but also its background, that I choose to make it my number 1 pick this year.

(fuck that train level though)

#GOOD GOD ITS DONE FINALLY YAYY #i know there's so many typos i will have to fix and i cringe a little at the phrasing of a few things but that's tomorrow me's problem #also I am aware I am insane you did not need to write all of that nor did I want to #<33 #game recommendations

[writersdrug]

Simon Riley x Dog Sitter! Reader pt. 2

<- Previous - Next ->

Warnings: light cursing, light nsfw, Simon being the tiniest bit of a creep

A/N: so originally this was just a fluffy thought I had a few weeks ago... it's slowly turning into a longer, multi-chapter series, and Simon is a bit darker than I had intended him to be... but the story is still going to stay relatively normal (there will be full NSFW further down the line, lol)!

Sure enough, Simon had emailed you by Tuesday afternoon. You noticed how... unprofessional it was. Not that he had been rude or obscene, but it was obviously written by someone who never had to write many emails for his career.

here is riley's routine. she likes walks, usually 3 or 4 a day. she eats one scoop in the morning and one at night. she doesn't finish her food all at once, but she'll come back to it. if you're gonna give her more cookies, just two per day. fill water every morning. around the house, if you could just dust and clean up any dog hair, that would be great. let me know if meeting me tomorrow at 0900 for the key works. I ship out thursday. thanks.

Simon.

You chewed your thumb nail, reclining on your couch with a confused expression. Was he irritated with you for some reason? He didn't show it at the interview if he did have any hostile feelings... you reminded yourself that he was a rather gruff man, and maybe that just bled into his written words, too. You rolled your shoulders and started working out your reply.

Hello Simon! Tomorrow works perfect for me, I'll be there by 9 am!

Does Riley have any favorite places she likes to go? Any particular spots or trails she enjoys? Also, are there any rules you have for her, like being on the couch? Is she ok going to the dog park? Lastly, does she take any medications I should be aware of?

See you soon!

You sent the message, sighing and dropping your head back against the arm of the sofa. You were honestly thankful that you'd gotten the job, even if Simon was a rather stiff client. You finally quit your shitty job, and while you did still have babysitting your niece and nephew, you never charged for that - the only time you were "paid" for it was when you took them out somewhere fun, and your sister forced you to accept money for the admission fee.

So this gig fell into your lap at the perfect time. And the fact that you had beat every other person Simon had interviewed made your ego soar. It wouldn't be a bad idea to make a career out of this, you thought.

Your phone dinged - you held it above your face, and saw that Simon had already responded. You sat upright and opened the email.

she only takes aspirin when her leg flares up. no more than twice a day. no favorite trails, we just go around the block a few times. she can sit on the couch, my bed too, but she'll need help getting up. no human food is the only other rule. never took her to a dog park, but if you really want to, that's fine. she's good with other dogs.

Simon.

You frowned. Walking the same block every day, multiple times each day, sounded awful. It wasn't even close to animal neglect, but you couldn't imagine walking the same route every single time. If it didn't drive Riley insane, it certainly would for you.

You read back over the email, your eyes lingering on "if her legs flare up." Simon had never discussed Riley having arthritis with you - and you sincerely hoped that was the reason she had leg pain, and nothing else. You made a mental note to ask him about it tomorrow as you began to write your reply.

Understood. Thanks again!

--------------

"Here's the basement." Simon said, leading you down the stairs and into a dullish room. It had a cheaply-manufactured desk, what appeared to be a dining chair (not matching the dining set upstairs), a stuffed bookshelf, and some cardboard boxes filled with paper. A fan stood in the far corner, and next to it was the washing room. Much like what he had shown you of the rest of the house, it was bland and drab.

You looked around, letting out a polite noise of approval. Truth be told, Simon's life seemed awfully boring to you. Your mother had always told you that military men were always overly practical, in more than just home decor. They never cared much for the environment around them, as long as there was no mold, or anything similar. But you had never expected it to be so brutally true.

You knew he had a life outside of his home - from the way he described it, he was usually deployed more often than he was in his own home country. But you wondered - what did he do for fun, besides watch the telly? Did he have friends, and were they all like him? Any hobbies?

"If for whatever reason y' need to clean up a stain, you can find solution in there." He said, pointing to the washer room. "Other than that, nothin' much to see down 'ere."

You followed him as he trudged back up the stairs. Riley was sat upright on the floor, watching you and Simon move about the house with an observant expression.

"The only other things I'll ask you to do is hoover n' dust when it looks like it needs it." He said, leaning against the kitchen counter. "There really isn't much else t' do; of course, if you do see anything that needs fixin' you can always text me." He rolled his head from side to side, wincing as he worked out a crick in his neck. "Might not answer immediately, but I'll see it."

You nodded, standing in the walkway of the kitchen. Even with him leaning against the counter, muscles hidden under his sweatshirt, he was huge. For a brief moment, you imagined what he looked like on the field, dressed in his uniform and holding a gun - but you quickly shooed the thought from your mind before it had the chance to latch on and fester. "Gotcha. And just so I know, do you let Riley sleep with you?"

Simon paused in confusion before he responded. "Come again?"

"Like- you know, if I crash on the couch, is she allowed up with me?" You said, shifting your weight. You couldn't quite tell if Simon was irked by your question, or if he was genuinely confused.

He paused again. "Uh, yea, that's fine. If y' don't mind waking up covered in 'er slobber."

You laughed. "Nah, I'm used to it. A little drool never bothered me. Although, if I do need to wash up, am I alright to use the shower? Or would you rather I use my own back at my flat?"

Suddenly, it clicked in Simon's head. You were planning on sleeping at his house.

He had assumed you would just stop by for walks and meals - he didn't expect you to actually live here while he was gone, and he wasn't sure how it made him feel. He'd never had anyone else spend the night. Hell, no one ever visited, besides the rare occasions of the rest of the 141 stopping by. Even then, they never stayed for longer than a conversation or two.

But, once he took a second to think about it, he realized it might be better if you did stay - at least, while he was on missions. Riley would be bored out of her mind if she was alone that long, especially after spending the past several weeks with Simon constantly there. It would be good for someone to be there when he wasn't, and you seemed like you would be the best person for that, of course.

"Sure, 's fine." He said, rubbing the back of his head. "Just don't touch my shit in there."

"Don't worry about that..." You said quietly, "catch me dead and cold before I touch a 3-in-1 anything."

He chuckled and rolled his eyes. It was refreshing that you could handle his gruffness - most people treated him like a landmine, never wanting to say the wrong thing and set him off. You seemed to have taken life by the horns, like you weren't afraid to bite back at someone. He wondered if that was all for show, or if you really would snap back if he was to test you...

He pushed himself off the counter and reached into the drawer behind him, pulling out a spare key. He walked over to you and held it out. You were just about to take it, when he suddenly yanked it back.

You faltered. "Sorry...?"

"You lose this key..." Simon began lowly, "n' I'll frame you for murder. Understood?"

You gaped, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. He didn't really mean that... did he? You waited for him to laugh and say he was just joking... but he never did. His eyes bored into yours so intensely, making you shiver, as he waited for you to answer.

"Y-yes, sir. Understood." You said, voice wavering a bit.

He grunted in satisfaction, then handed you the key. You let out the breath you had been holding, then cautiously took the key, before immediately attaching it to your lanyard. You didn't want to take any chances at losing it - not after Simon's threat. You took a deep breath and smiled at him, trying to dust the exchange off of your shoulders.

"You can come 'round tomorrow after o' nine hundred, I'll be out by then." He said, turning sideways to moce past you and heading towards the door. You followed behind and rubbed Riley's head when you passed her; she let out a contented sound.

"Feel free t' use the kitchen if you'll be stayin' overnight." He opened the door for you and leaned against it.

"Will do, thank you!" You chirped, hovering on the landing outside of his house, right were you were two days ago. "Thank you for showing me around - good luck on your- mission- deployment, thingamajig!"

He huffed. "Promise I will, luv."

Your spine tingled in response to his comment. Get it together, don't get your knickers in a twist over a client. You thought. You straightened your posture and cleared your throat.

"Well, see you around!" You said with a smile, then hopped down the steps to your car.

Simon waved, taking a moment to watch you pull out of his driveway. He shut the door and leaned back against it, exhaling slowly through his nostrils.

He was an observant man - he had to be, with his occupation. Your reaction to being called "luv" didn't fly over his head. And it's not like Simon didn't know the effect he had on women... he knew how he looked, how he presented himself, and he saw the reactions it got him.

But with you, something felt different. He saw your reaction, and a part of him wanted to chase after it. To see what you would do if he continued to apply pressure to your weak spots. Would you blush? Would you call him out? Would you drop the gig altogether?

He thought about how easily the word "sir" had rolled off of your tongue. He thought about how you would look, all tuckered out on his couch, donned in whatever pajamas you decided to wear, your face peaceful and expression soft as you slept - he imagined you in his shower, the room filled with warm steam and the scent of your shampoo, water hitting your skin as you-

Riley barked, making Simon jolt where he stood. She stared at him, ears turned to the side as she whined. She could always tell when he began to dissociate, and knew just as much as he did that it wasn't a good sign.

Simon sighed, running a hand down his face. "Get it together, fuckin' creep." He muttered to himself. "I need a bloody hobby, f' Christ's sake..."

He blamed it on the upcoming mission. He would typically stress about it beforehand, and if there was anything else that could occupy his mind, he would fixate on it. Right now, unfortunately, you were the victim. But he buried it deep down into his subconscious - it wasn't fair to you.

He pushed himself off of the door and headed towards the washroom, adjusting his crotch as he went. He figured he should at least tidy it up a bit, since you would be using it. The only other people who had been in there were Johnny and Captain Price, and of course, they never cared if there were trimmers on the counter, or if the mirror had splotches from toothpaste residue.

Hopefully, he'd forget all about you - at least, while he was on the mission.

------------

Taglist: @my-queen-rhaenyra-targaryen @jisungswiftie @sweet-tooth4you @kennyis-aloser @hyyyxr @lahniu @dory-98 @naradae

Let me know if you'd like to be added to the taglist!

#simon ghost riley x reader #simon riley #simon riley x reader #ghost x reader #ghost #simon riley x reader smut #ghost x reader smut #ghost smut #simon riley smut #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley smut #cod fanfiction #cod mw3 #cod mw2 #call of duty #cod #cod x reader

[astroph1les]

falling behind [h.c]

summary: feeling like you’re never going to experience the normal dating experience, you turn to your friend, hazel, to teach you how to kiss. friends help each other out like that, right?

pairing: hazel callahan x fem!reader

contains: mature language and content, hickies (r!recieving), heavy making out, causal dominance from hazel, sort of player!hazel, cocky!hazel, josie & isabel being all over each other, hinting that hazel and birttany are bffs, inexperienced! reader, slight insecure! reader, reader is mentioned to have multiple sisters, hazel being so sweet and reassuring to reader.

word count: 2.6K

a/n: based on this request, by @toritea (i hope you enjoy it! xx) i actually had too much fun writing this. need me a hazel :/ also how am i at over 200 followers already?? you guys are insane. but i love you all for it. enjoy! <3

You were really happy for Josie and Isabel. You really were. You knew Josie had had a massive crush on Isabel for years now and they finally got together. But, it was moments like this where they were making out, borderline about to fuck against your and Josie’s shared dorm room door, that made you want to rip your head right out of your head.

“Okay, guys,” you speak up, trying to reach for the handle that was underneath their hips.

There was a moan at some point and you decided that you were going to Brittany and Hazel’s dorm room since clearly yours and Josie’s was going to be occupied. You backed away and marched down to the almost identical door except Hazel and Brittany’s names were scribbled on the dry-erase board.

You knocked on the door with a sigh, the image of Josie and Isabel still fresh in your mind. The door opened to reveal Hazel with squinted eyes. She had on a gray hoodie with a pair of what you think of boxers or shorts that look similarly to boxers.

“Hey, did I wake you?” You glance at her attire.

“Uh, no, I just woke up from a nap,” Hazel furrowed her brows, “is everything okay?”

You sigh, shaking your head. “Josie and Isabel—“

“Oh, okay, yeah. Come in,” Hazel moved out of the way to let you into the dorm room.

You glanced around the room, smiling at the obvious difference between Brittany and Hazel’s beds. Brittany had one of those neon wall lights of a sun with baby pink and white sheets. Hazel had basic different shades of gray comforters and sheets along with a few throw pillows.

“I love them but my god, they never stop. I was just trying to stop by to change,” you sigh as you walk over to sit on Hazel’s bed.

Hazel smacked her lips together with a shrug, adjusting her hoodie on her head.

“Well, I mean, that’s what it's like to have a girlfriend. It’s the ‘honeymoon’ phase.” Hazel explained before adding, “kissing and fucking is fun, though.”

Your cheeks burn at her words. Being the only person you know to not have any sexual experience—let alone kiss—made you feel like you were falling behind. Sure, it was only freshman year of college, but it didn’t help the longing of wanting to get this sort of shit over with.

Hazel was the one that you envied the most. Or at least, the girls she was hooking up with. After high school, Hazel became a bit of a heartthrob. Brittany had told you about how she had passed by their room sometimes and would hear almost-porn-like moaning and panting. You would be lying too if you said that you’ve never heard these noises too come from their room.

In simple words, Hazel fucks and fucks good.

“Still, I don’t need to see it happen, Haze,” you emphasized.

“Maybe you need to go and get some then,” Hazel remarks with a cheeky grin, walking over to sit across from you on Brittanys bed.

“Um, no. I can’t do that,” you shake your head and hope that she doesn’t press or ask more questions.

Hazel furrows her brows as she watches the way your body language shifts as soon as the subject of sex comes up.

“Why not? You’re gorgeous. I’m sure someone wants to fuck you.” Hazel states as if you should’ve been aware of this.

It was definitely a bit of a confidence booster that Hazel found you attractive.

“Thanks, Haze but it’s not like people are lining up to be with me unlike some people,” your eyes stare into hers, raising your brows. “I wouldn’t even know what to do anyways.”

Hazel tilts her head and purses her lips together, unclear to what you meant. She meant it when she said you were gorgeous. Even now in your day to day outfits of tees and baby tanks with jean shorts. She’s always thought this way about you but had to push it deep down to keep your friendship intact.

“Wait, have you not…?” Hazel trailed off to see what the limit was of experience that you may or may not have had.

“I’m a virgin and have never even kissed anyone before except for, like, once in 4th grade over a dare,” you spat out, feeling the ever most embarrassed.

The question made you irritated. Why? You couldn’t tell the exact reason but it was definitely a combination of stress and lack of sexual activity.

“Hey, hey,” Hazel stood up and off Brittany's bed to sit next to you on her bed. “There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, you know?”

“No, I know that. It’s just annoying sometimes to not have someone in that romantic way.” You tell her with a forced grin.

Hazel nods in agreement. Silence takes over you two until you get an idea. It was risky and could possibly change everything about your relationship with Hazel if she says yes.

“Haze? Can you,” you sigh and look at her slowly, “can you teach me how to kiss?”

You wince as you prepare for the immediate rejection from Hazel.

“You want me to teach you?” Hazel adjusts her position on her bed so that she has one leg curled on the mattress and the other hanging off.

“Well, yeah, if that’s okay. I know you’ve been with a lot more girls than I have so I assume you know what you’re doing,” you state simply, blushing at the memories of the muffled moaning you’ve heard through the door.

Hazel chuckled at your words, removing her hood from her bed head. You watch her carefully, all of a sudden aware of every move you both made. You took notice of her chains that rested at the bottom of her throat probably from being tossed in her sleep.

“Are you sure? Like, 100%?”

You nod, eyes flickering to her lips. Hazel had done the same and scooted back from you as she was 10 seconds away from kissing you feverishly, but she had to hold back. You had never kissed before, she reminded herself.

“Okay, well, the first thing is comfortability. Are you comfortable sitting like this?” Hazel motioned around you two.

You think about it for a moment before questioning: “Is there a better way to sit when kissing?”

“Some girls like to sit on my lap, some like me to be sort of hovering over them. Even like, laying down and we’re making out is always comfortable too,” Hazel explains, all of a sudden feeling very nervous talking about all of the things she’s done with these girls that weren’t you.

You contemplate for a moment, mentally trying to ignore how Hazel had said ‘some girls.’ It just reminded you that this can only be a ‘friends helping friends’ situation. Laying down might be comfortable but to you, that sounded like a more experienced position. The idea of Hazel hovering over you would cause you to go actually insane.

“Can I be on your lap? I-If that’s okay?” You ask, glancing down to look at Hazel’s lap.

“Yeah, yeah, just— yeah,” she began to adjust herself so that her upper back was up against the headboard with her legs spread out. “C’mere, honey.”

You’re a horny idiot, you scold yourself internally as you inch over to Hazel, your thighs straddling her upper thighs. Her hands rest respectfully on your lower thighs, just above your knees.

This position felt so intimate now that you were here. You could see every speck of blue in her eyes and the slight bags from lack of sleep. You could just stare at Hazel like this and be content.

“You okay?” Her voice is gentle.

“Yeah, just a little nervous,” you admit truthfully.

“I get it, it's okay. Nothing’s wrong with being a little nervous,” she reassures you and the way she was rubbing her thumbs across the bare skin makes your head fuzzy. “Just take a deep breath in and out a few times.”

You do as she asks of you, your previous rapid heartbeat coming to a decrease in speed. Hazel seems to take notice of your chest slowing down.

“There you go. Good. That’s good, honey.”

Hazel praised you, a rush flooding to your brain. You gave her a shy smile as you tried to focus on what the whole point of this was. Kissing.

That’s it. It’s just kissing.

“So, now what?” You hum, fiddling with the end of Hazel’s gray hoodie.

“Let’s do one so I can see how you kiss.” Hazel rose a hand to cup your cheek, watching your breath hitch ever so slightly.

“Okay.”

“Don’t worry about kissing ‘bad’, okay? Go with the flow,” she reassures you once again.

You nod, muttering one final ‘okay’. Hazel leans her face towards yours, slightly brushing her lips against yours. From this soft touch alone, you could tell that you were going to fuck this up. Hazel closed the gap by tugging you by your cheek, locking your lips together.

You attempt to follow her slow rhythm as your hands grip onto the cotton of Hazel’s hoodie. This is going well, you think until Hazel pulls away. You instinctively try to chase her lips, but she chuckles softly at your attempt. Her hot breath brushes past your own slightly parted mouth.

“Getting eager, huh?” She teases, brushing her nose against yours.

“Shut up.” Your cheeks flush at her words.

That same flush spread to your chest and the depths of your stomach. All you wanted to do was jump her bones. Now, you understood why she had girls moaning so loud that there would be complaints from the neighboring peers.

“You did good, though. You really don’t have anything to worry about.” Hazel patted the side of your thigh like it was nothing.

“Really?” You furrow your brows, confused as to how you who had no experience could actually kiss well.

“Mhmm. I don’t think you have anything to worry about, honey. You’re a natural,” she glanced down at your lips with a smile.

“What about, like, making out? Like with tongue?” You were really pushing your luck now. There’s no way she was going to agree to doing more than just basic French kissing.

“Oh, yeah, that’s a little more complicated. There is such a thing as too much tongue. That’s how people get mono. It also just feels fucking gross.” Hazel explains with a grimace.

You copy her disgusted face as one of your sisters had gotten mono before and she couldn’t properly swallow anything for about a week. You remember her constant complaining, saying that she wouldn’t kiss anyone for the next year.

The following month she had gotten a boyfriend so clearly, she was a shit-faced liar.

“Yeah, that’s what I’ve heard,” you reply back with an awkward chuckle.

“That’s a worse-case scenario, though. It’s supposed to feel good like everything else that’s as intimate as this,” Hazel is quick to reassure you, her hands squeezing and rubbing at your thighs.

“Right. Got it. So, how is ‘good making out’ supposed to feel?” You held up your fingers to copy the quote motion. “I’ve heard you’re mind blowing at it so…”

“You really are boosting my ego here, honey,” Hazel shook her head slightly as if she was being bashful about her experience. Her cocky ass smile said otherwise.

“Like it wasn’t already up there,” you quipped back with a pointed look but your lips were curling into a giddy smile.

“Y’know we can’t make out when we talk, right?”

Hazel’s painfully attractive smirk forms on her lips.

Her hands grasp onto your waist, her thumbs digging into your lower ribs. The cold feeling of her silver rings caused you to gasp as her lips were against yours once again.

You hum against her lips, your hands cupping both sides of her face. From what you’ve seen in movies and shows, usually there’d be a hand through someone’s hair. You test it out and run one hand up the back of Hazel’s head, her soft hairs brushing in between your fingers.

Hazel’s tongue swipes past your bottom lip and you try to welcome it into your mouth. It feels… weird at first but when Hazel tugs you in closer with her tight grip, it heightens the pleasure for you. You suck on her tongue for just a moment before letting her take the reins once again.

You feel her pull away and you think she’s going to say that you did something wrong. No, her lips begin to trail down to your jaw. She made sure to leave a hot kiss on your cheek and jaw before latching yourself onto your neck.

You pant softly, a soft whine leaving your lips. Hazel’s tongue peeked out to lick across a sensitive spot on your neck that you didn’t even know about. How the fuck did she figure that out? She rolled the skin in between her lips and sucked softly.

“Haze,” you breathe out as you tilt your neck back.

This pulled Hazel out of her hungry-lust driven state. She didn’t ask if she could do that. You didn’t ask for a hickey. Fuck.

Hazel paused her movements, detaching herself from your neck. The skin glistened slightly with spit, highlighting the deepening blush color that had raised to your skin.

“Oh, fuck. Shit, I’m sorry,” Hazel rushed out as she examined the forming hickey.

“What? What is it?” You furrow your brows in a panic as well.

“This is gonna be a dark hickey later. Fuck, honey,” her thumb rubbed over the raw skin.

You stay silent. You didn’t want to admit that being covered in her hickies was something that you’ve wanted for a while now. Just friends, you reminded yourself. Just friends.

“It’s okay. I liked how it felt.” You suck in a deep breath, trying to calm your rapid heart rate.

Hazel’s alluring blue eyes flicker from the spot on your neck to your flushed face. It took everything in her to hold back the urge to kiss over it as an apology for what she did.

“Still, it’s not what you had asked to do. I should’ve,” Hazel paused to remove her hands from your waist. You already missed the warmth dearly. “I should’ve asked first.”

“Haze, it’s really okay. I felt…” Horny. Just horny. Desperate. Horny for a third time.

“Good?” She answered for you as you still hadn’t said anything.

You hadn’t realized that you had paused in real life instead of just in your head.

“Yeah, yeah, good. I promise,” you tell her with a soft smile.

“Well, it sounded like it was good,” Hazel quipped with a cocky smirk on her face before smacking her clothed shoulder.

“God, I’m regretting this already,” you half-lie.

You regret asking Hazel to be the one to teach you but you don’t regret her kissing you and giving you a hickey.

Oh, god.

How were you going to explain the dark mark on your neck to everyone? You never curled your hair so it’s not like a burn could be an excuse.

You were about to ask Hazel how you were going to cover it up when the door opened. Brittany stood at the door sporting a cropped black tank with a gemmed red heart and a pair of low-rise blue jeans. Her brows raised at the sight of you and Hazel before she pursed her lips to hide her obvious smile that was creeping onto her lips.

“I’ll just come back later,” Brittany gave Hazel a look that you couldn’t quite pinpoint.

Okay so everyone but Brittany.

taglist: @imjustapearl @beabeebrie @curiousshifter101 @seethesin @matchamilkislover <33

#hazel callahan x reader #bottoms movie #hazel callahan #bottoms 2023 #sapphic #wlw #ruby cruz #i need her #player!hazel is hot as fuck

[moviesismylife]

Overprotective mate (Azriel x f!reader)

Summary:

You offer Azriel a place at your house, to get away from Nesta and Cassian’s lust. You get injured on a mission for Rhys, and Azriel goes all mother hen mode.

Warnings:

Mentions of intimacy

Blood, injury

Mentions of alcohol

Tropes:

Who did this to you?

Friends to lovers

Note:

Hey lovelies, this is my first fic on here, so please be nice. I really enjoy writing and drooling over fictional characters, and I know you do too. So let’s feed our delusion together. I know y’all are thirsting over Azriel as much as I am.

Enjoy x

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Y/n

I knock on Nesta and Cassian’s door, clothed in my fighting leathers.

The door knob twists and the door freaks, as I spot Nesta’s head poking through the door.

“Y/n, what are you doing here?” She asks as he opens the door fully.

“Coming to see you, and also to talk to Azriel about something” I tell her.

She steps aside to let me in, and I do. The door closes behind me, and the warmth of the house hits my body.

My back is facing her, so she walks around me to face my front.

“Sorry about the mess, I was going to clean it up, but I got a little distracted” she says, a hint of a smirk on her lips.

“Okay ew, I did not need to know that” I say, making a disgusted face, and she just chuckles in response.

“Nes who’s here” a male voice says, as it enters the hallway we’re standing in.

“Cassian” I say smiling at him.

“Y/n!” He squeals, and runs over to hug me.

He lifts me off the floor easily, and spins me around.

I laugh, as I hug him back.

He lets me down, and stands next to Nesta.

“Where’s Az?” I ask them both.

They look towards the living room, and I take that as a hint.

I leave my weapons in the hallway, and head into the living area.

As I enter I can’t spot him, but I hear some noises coming from the kitchen, so naturally I head towards them.

When I enter, I spot Azriel with his back to me.

He has a towel slung over one of his shoulders, and the water is running in the sink. He’s clothed in his Illyrian fighting leathers, sculpting his body like a god.

“You just got done with your morning workout?” I ask, to make him aware of my presence.

He turns around, not at all startled, and just leans against the counter.

“Y/n. What are you doing here?” He asks, as he sips from the water bottle he must have been filling up.

Fuck he looks insanely good. His hair is damp from his workout, and his cheeks are slightly tinted. His skin is glowing from the sweat, but he still manages to smell absolutely divine.

“I’m actually here to talk to you” I say, as I place my elbows on the kitchen isle in front of me, leaning forward.

“Okay…about what?” He asks me, putting down his water bottle.

“Well I have an offer for you” I tell him.

“What kind of offer?” He questions.

“To come live with me, instead of the two horndogs you’re living with right now” I answer him.

He raises his eyebrows in confusion.

“Look I have a spare room in my little cottage on the edge of the city, and I’m barely ever home. So do you need somewhere private and quiet to stay, my place is open” I explain to him.

“Oh uhm, are you sure?” He asks.

Honestly I’m kind of shocked he’s agree so quickly. I mean I would want to get away from Nesta and Cassian’s fucking too, but I expected him to mull it over more.

“Yeah of course. It’s no trouble. Besides as I said, I’m almost never home, so you’d basically have the place to yourself” I tell him.

“That’s generous of you, but I would have to talk to Nesta and Cassian about it first” he says, as he puts his towel down on the counter.

“Yeah, no of course” I say, and he gives me a slight nod, before walking off to find them.

*about 15 minutes later*

“Why do you have to leave us Az? I liked having you here” Cassian whines, as me and Azriel are standing in the hallway, ready to leave.

“It’s okay babe, we’ll have the house all to ourselves now” Nesta grins at him.

That makes him shut up, and grin back.

I roll my eyes and pick up my weapons.

“You’ll be free to visit anytime” I tell them both, and they nod at me.

“Okay you ready?” I ask Azriel, as I offer up my arm.

He links his in mine, and I winnow us out.

——————

We land in my own hallway, and I let go of his arm.

Again, I put my weapons down, and he does as well.

“Okay, you want me to show you around?” I turn to look at him.

He just nods. Not exactly a man of many words.

I walk left and into the living room.

“Okay, so here is the small living area, and in there is the kitchen” I say, pointing to an archway leading from the living room.

Then I walk back into the hallway.

“That door leads to a small bathroom” I hint to the door on the right.

“Okay that’s everything downstairs, so let me show you upstairs” I start walking up the stairs.

I can hear him following me as I lead us both up to the second floor.

As we reach the top of the stairs, there is a little hallway, with several doors on each side.

“Okay so uhm, this door leads into my room, and a private bathroom that connects with it” I say as I hint for the door on the left.

I walk in a little further, until I reach the first door on the right.

“And it’s basically the same in here, but you can feel free to explore it yourself” I continue.

He just nods in understanding.

I walk further until I reach two glass doors. I open them and walk out into a little balcony.

“So this is just a little comfort place, but I mostly use it for reading, drinking, and a landing spot for when I fly in” I explain to him.

Then I turn around to face him.

He’s just looking around him, studying everything.

“Okay well, I have to leave, but I’ll be back sometime tonight. I’ll try not to make a sound” I say, and he snaps his head to mine.

Again he just nods, and I take that as a hint for me to leave.

I turn around to walk back into the house when he speaks.

“Y/n?”

I turn around again to face him.

“Thank you” he smiles softly.

“Of course” I smile warmly back, before turning back around again, and walking into the hallway.

*hours later*

I winnow into my room, and land on the floor with a thud. I try to be more quiet as I stumble back steadily on my feet.

The wound on my hipbone is throbbing, and I need to attend to it now.

I promised Azriel I’d be quiet when I returned home, but I’ve not done so well this far.

I make my way over to my bathroom, grabbing some rubbing alcohol and a cloth. Then I stumble back into the bedroom, and take a seat on the bed.

I drop my weapons and every other thing I was carrying on the floor, as I try to unbutton my corset.

Fuck why does it have to be so difficult. I try not to moan out in pain, as my wound keeps on throbbing.

I was attacked by several water wraiths on my mission for Rhys. And I made my way out fine, except for the open wound on my hipbone.

But luckily I achieved what I wanted, and I was able to retrieve the item he sent me for.

Although that would be no help if I couldn’t deliver it to him in the morning. And right now, by the looks of the wound, I needed some serious healing.

There was some kind of poison in my wound and I’d try to extract it with my magic, to no avail.

I’d have to go to a healer tomorrow, but now I just wanted sleep.

I finally pull off my corset, and throw it on the floor, as I lift up my white linen shirt to get better access to the wound.

I grab the cloth and rubbing alcohol, pouring some on it, as I press the cloth to my flesh.

I scream in pain, as the alcohol connects with my open and fresh skin. Blood is already dripping everywhere, and I bite down on my lip to refrain from screaming again.

The last thing I want is to wake up Azriel.

The someone bursts through my door.

“Y/n!” Azriel says panicked, as he flings the door open.

I snap my head to him, and curse myself for waking him.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you” I apologize as he heads over to me.

“What happened?” He asks, avoiding my apology.

He bends down in front of me, and kneels as he takes a look at my hand pressed firmly on my wound.

“Let me see it” he demands, as he looks up at me.

“No I’m fine. Go back to bed” I argue, as I wave him away.

“There’s no fucking way I’m leaving you like this” he curses, and I’m shocked at his sudden angry tone.

He notices and softens, as he speaks again.

“Just let me help you” he pleads, looking into my eyes, and I give up.

I raise my hand and cloth from the wound, revealing to to him.

“Who did this to you?” He ask as he removes the cloth slowly from my hand.

I let him.

“Water wraiths” I answer, as he moves his hand to my shirt.

He lifts it slightly higher, and I shiver as his fingers grazes my skin lightly.

He looks up into my eyes asking for permission to tend to my wound.

I just give him a slight nod, and he presses the cloth carefully onto my skin again.

I wince, as I grab onto his shoulder in reaction.

He cleans the wound thoroughly, and patches me up. He even uses some of his own magic to soothe out the pain.

As he’s finished I immediately feel relief wash over me.

“You’re gonna have to see a healer tomorrow” he says a he takes the alcohol and cloth into the bathroom.

“I will. After I talk to Rhys” I tell him.

“He sent you on this dangerous mission?” He questions as he turns around to walk back into my bedroom.

I don’t answer him, and use my magic to change from fighting leathers into a simple nightgown.

I let my hair stay in the messy braid it already is, before I crawl into my bed.

“Goodnight Azriel, and thank you” I say as I get comfortable.

He sighs and heads over to my door. He halts before walking out.

“Anytime you need me, I’m here. No matter what it is” he says, and I don’t get to respond before he vanishes out of my room, closing the door behind him.

I try not to think about it, as I close my eyes, waiting for sleep to pull me in. And eventually it does.

*next morning*

I open my eyes to sunlight beaming through my curtains. I shift to sit up in my bed.

As I lift my nightgown, I notice that my wound has worsened overnight. Although the throbbing sensation isn’t as bad as it was last night. Thanks to Azriel.

I get out of bed, and pull on some pants, as well as a red loose linen shirt, also pulling on a pair of simple black boots.

I look in the mirror to spot my hair a mess, so I take out the braid, and twist my hair into a messy bun, using a large hair pin to secure it.

Then I decide to head downstairs.

As I walk down, I hear some grumbling and clinking of metal, sounding from the kitchen.

I walk into the living room, and further into the kitchen, where I spot Azriel, cooking food.

That’s something I never thought I’d see.

He must notice my presence, because he turns his head slightly to the side, sliding his eyes over my body.

I can’t help but feel tingles as he roams his gaze over me.

“You feeling better?” He asks as he turns his head back around.

I debate whether I should tell him about the spreading of the wound or not. But I do, as he’s probably gonna demand to see it anyways.

“A little yeah, your magic helped a lot with the pain. But the poison has spread” I say, sitting down at the small kitchen table.

“Let me see it” he demands as expected, turning his full body around to face me.

I sigh, and lift up my shirt to the expose the infected wound.

He curses under his breath, and strides over to where I’m sitting.

“I’m gonna kill Rhys for letting this happen to you” he says angrily.

“Az it’s fine. I chose to go. Rhys didn’t force me” I explain to him.

“You got hurt y/n. Badly” he looks into my eyes.

He’s standing in front of me, making me look up at him.

“I told you, I’m fine” I say again.

He lifts my chin up slightly, placing a hand under it.

“I’m coming with you to the town house” he says and walks away, back to whatever he’s cooking.

I sigh, knowing I won’t be able to stop him. If he wants to come, he’s gonna come.

——————

Me and Az are standing in the living room in the town house with Rhys.

“Why did you let her leave when you knew how dangerous it was?” Azriel asks Rhys mad.

He’s been cursing out Rhys for the past five minutes now, for letting me go on a mission with him. I’ve been trying to stop Az but he won’t listen to me.

“Azriel. She wanted to go herself. And I’m sorry she got hurt. But you can’t put this on me” Rhys says calmly, trying to reason with Az.

“I don’t fucking care! This IS your fault! If it was Feyre that got hurt, how would you have reacted then huh?” Az argues, but Rhys is just standing with his arms crossed over his chest.

“Do not bring Feyre into this” Rhys warns.

“Bring me into what?” A soft voice asks from behind.

We all turn our heads to spot Feyre, Mor, Nesta and Cassian all standing in the hallway, looking at us.

“It’s nothing guys…” I try to tell them.

“Then why does Azriel look like he’s gonna rip Rhys’s head off?” Cassian asks confused.

I sigh heavily, taking a deep breath.

“Rhys sent y/n on a dangerous mission and almost got her killed. And then he doesn’t even care” Azriel explains to them, and they all turn their heads to Rhys.

“He’s being over dramatic. Y/n wanted to go herself” Rhys tries to explain calmly to the others.

“Over dramatic? Have you seen her fucking wound?” Azriel curses, very angry.

Everyone looks shocked at Azriel’s swearing. He’s the quiet type, and rarely gets angry in front of others. Especially angry with us.

“Az…please calm down..” I say breaking the silence.

“I won’t calm down when you could have died y/n” he yells at me.

“Why are you yelling at me? I’m just trying to talk to you” I answer a little annoyed at him for yelling at me, when it’s Rhys he’s actually angry with.

He doesn’t answer and just tries to steady his breathing instead. Then Cassian walks over to me.

“Let me see your injury y/n…” he tells me quietly, to not trigger Azriel.

I lift up my shirt to show the infected wound, spreading more and more over my body.

He slaps his hand over his mouth, as he looks at it, and the girls run over to see how bad it is. They too look scared as they inspect the wound.

“Rhys this is not a normal wound. I think she’s been poisoned” Feyre says as she looks at her mate.

He walks over to me to see it for himself, and raises his eyebrows in shock as he sees it.

“Fuck. I’m sorry y/n. I shouldn’t have let you go on that mission for me” he apologizes.

“No it’s fine, I wanted to myself” I tell him, and he gives me an apologetic smile.

“Azriel please don’t be mad at him for this…” I say as I look over at him.

“Az come on man…we’ll take her to a healer” Cassian adds as well, trying to get his attention.

I sigh, moving away from the others and walking over to him.

He’s standing with his arms crossed over his chest, and I move my hands to them, to untuck his tight grip.

As I touch his arms, he rests a little into me, letting me touch him.

“You promised you’d go with me to the healer…” I say at a desperate attempt to get his attention.

Finally he looks up at me.

“Fine. But we’re leaving now” he agrees, but doesn’t show any emotion.

The others don’t say anything as he strides to the front door to leave as fast as he can.

I wait to follow him, turning my attention to the others.

“I’ll talk to him alright? He’ll be fine, he just needs to calm down” I tell them.

They nod their heads, and I move the front door, to leave with Az.

——————

We arrive at the healer, and a kind fae named Victoria inspects my wound.

I am sitting on a medical bed, while Azriel is standing in the corner, arms crossed over his chest.

“Your wound has been poisoned” Victoria says as she touches my skin slightly.

“Yeah we kind of figured that part out ourselves” I joke slightly.

She touches my wound and I wince.

“I’m sorry” she says, pulling away.

“It’s fine, just help me please” I say, stealing a quick glance over at Azriel.

His face is blank, watching every movement.

Victoria walks over to a little table, grabbing some herbs and medicine, before walking back over to me.

“I’ll put these herbs on your wound, and it should heal in about a week. I will also give you these pills for the pain. And I would highly advise you to take it slow, and not do anything to livid, so it can heal faster” she tells me, putting the herbs on the infected wound.

I nod my head in understanding.

“I’ll be careful, and postpone any energetic exercises until it’s fully healed” I tell her.

She smiles warmly at me.

“Should anything go wrong, you come to me alright?” She asks as she bandages up my wound again.

“Of course” I smile at her, standing up from the bed.

I walk over to the door and Azriel follows me.

“Oh and remember to change your bandage daily” she adds quickly, and I nod again, before walking out of her little office.

Me and Azriel walk into the sunny streets of Velaris, and a light breeze blows by.

“See I told you it was fine” I say, trying to lighten Azriel’s mood.

“You got lucky” he answers coldly, and I roll my eyes.

“Are you still in a mood? Stop being so over dramatic” I say as I turn to look at him.

“I’m not over dramatic. I’m just being protective. I hate seeing you hurt” he tells me and I feel my heart jump a beat at his words.

“Well I’m glad you care about me Az, but I don’t want you to flip out on everyone because I got hurt” I say, as I cross my arms over my chest.

He doesn’t say anything, and just looks down at the ground in silence.

I sigh.

“Can we go back to the town house now? And can you please promise me that you won’t stay mad at Rhys?” I ask him, and he looks up at me.

“I promise to try” he answers me, and I sigh in defeat, knowing that’s the best answer I’ll get.

Then we walk back, heading towards the town house.

——————

“We’re back!” I yell as we enter the town house.

I take off my shoes and coat and walk into the living room, where I find all of them chatting amongst themselves.

“Y/n how’d it go?” Rhys asks as Azriel comes up behind me.

“It went fine actually. The nurse put some herbs on my wound to kill the poison, and some pills for the pain. But it should be healed in about a week” I say smiling softly at him.

“That’s great y/n” Feyre tells me, and I smile at her too.

Rhys looks at Azriel staring behind me, and guilt flashes his face.

“Az…can we please squash it. It’s my fault I know. I shouldn’t have sent y/n on that mission” he says, looking at Azriel.

I hear Az sighing behind me, placing a gentle hand on my back, before speaking.

“Just don’t do it again” he says, accepting Rhys’s apology.

Rhys smiles contently.

Then I spit Cassian looking at the hand Azriel’s placed on my back, and he smirks.

Azriel notices Cassian too, and immediately pulls his hand back.

Cassian just chuckles at his reaction.

“Why don’t we go to Rita’s tonight? I think we all need it” I suggest.

“Can you drink with your injury?” Mor asks looking at me.

“Yeah as long as I don’t drink too much I should be fine. Tell you what I’ll be the responsible parent tonight” I answer.

“You know I could actually get down for that” Feyre agrees.

“Me too” Nesta adds.

“Me three” Cassian says, agreeing with everything his mate says.

The others nod in agreement as well.

“Okay great. We leave in thirty” I say, and walk towards the stairs, to go upstairs and get ready.

——————

I’m wearing a short, black, backless glitter dress, with some black heels. I’ve got my hair hanging down in loose waves, and some golden hoops in my ears.

I head downstairs to where the others are standing. Mor is wearing a red, satin, slit dress. Feyre is wearing a midnight blue, strapless dress. And Nesta is wearing an all black one, with long sleeves.

All the guys are clothed in the same black dress pants and shirts. The top buttons undone to show their muscular chests.

”Mor I love your dress” I smile at her.

“Thanks babes. You look hot ” she winks back.

“Yeah you look beautiful y/n” Azriel adds as well.

I look at him, kind of surprised at this sudden compliment. The others have the same reaction, as they look between us.

“Thanks Az…” I say awkwardly.

Feyre spots the obvious tension, and decides to interfere”

“Let’s go shall we?”

Rhys nods his head and opens the door, and we all leave.

——————

Azriel

I watch y/n as she dances and laughs with the other girls. She looks absolutely stunning, I can’t tear my eyes away from her.

I should have never anything earlier, although she didn’t seem to bother.

“Hey Az…you might wanna avert your gaze somewhere else for a while” Rhys says from beside me, in our little booth.

“What” I turn to look at him.

“You’ve been watching y/n like a hawk for the last thirty minutes now” he answers, smirking a little.

“What are you talking about?” I ask, even though I know he’s right.

“Az you’re completely eye fucking her” Cassian says as well, and I roll my eyes.

“I am not” I snap at him.

“Whatever you say” he grins.

I roll my eyes at him again, standing up.

“Where are you going?” Rhys asks confused.

“To get a drink” I answer shortly, and stride for the bar.

Y/n

“I’m tired can we sit down?” Feyre asks as another song comes on.

“Yeah I’m tired too” Mor adds.

“Yeah okay” I say, and we walk out of the crowd.

I head towards our little booth, where Cassian and Rhys are both sitting. No Azriel though.

“Hey, you guys done already?” Cassian asks as Nesta sits down next to him.

“You try to dance for an hour straight” she snaps at him, and he just laughs, placing a hand on her thigh.

“Hey where’s Azriel?” Feyre asks, taking a seat next to her mate.

Mor moves next to Feyre and I move next to Nesta.

“He said he was getting a drink, but he’s been gone for a while now” Rhys answers, looking out in the crowd for him.

“Azriel never drinks” I say, as I take a sip of Cassian’s from the table.

“Hey” he snaps at me, but I just glare at him.

“Maybe you should go looking for him y/n” Nesta says, looking at me.

“Why me?” I ask her.

“Because no one else wants to” she answers shortly.

“Fine…” I sigh, and get up.

I walk over to the crowd again to see if I spot him. I try to look over all the dancing bodies, but I can’t see him. Instead I take a quick look over at the bar, but I don’t find him there either.

I stand up on my tiptoes, searching for him, when I feel a pair of two large hands on my waist.

I turn around quickly, to find two drunken hazel eyes staring at me.

“Azriel” I say in surprise, as he’s standing very close.

We’re in the middle of the crowd, with several sweaty bodies pressed up against each other, making very little space for us.

He keeps his hands on my waist, while trailing his eyes all over my body. I blush slightly at his gaze, but try to hide it.

His grip tightens, and he pulls me into him, making my hands go to his chest in support.

Then he angels his head, moving his gaze to my lips. His fingers trace the bare back that’s not covered by my dress, and I slightly shiver.

“Azriel what are you doing…” I say lowly, as his fingers trail over my bare skin.

He doesn’t respond and instead moves his head to my ear, whispering.

“You look beautiful my love…”

I feel heat rise to my cheeks again at his words.

“You’re drunk” I respond slowly.

“I still think you’re absolutely divine” he speaks again and I don’t move.

He moves away from my ear, only for his face to be inches from mine.

My breathing gets heavy and I struggle to keep eye contact. What is happening to me?

“We should head back to the others…” I tell him.

“Should we?” He questions, looking at my lips again.

“Yes…” I breathe out, pulling away from him hesitantly.

He lets go of me, and I turn away, walking away from the crowd once again.

I can feel him following me, so I don’t stop.

As we reach our booth, the others turn to look at me. And Azriel, who comes up next to me, placing a hand on my waist.

“I see you found him” Rhys says, gazing towards the hand on my waist.

“Uh yes I did” I respond, moving to sit next to Nesta again.

“I can’t believe I’m even saying this. But is Azriel drunk?” Mor asks, grinning a little, as she looks at him.

“Mhm…” I nod in reply.

Her grin turns even wider, and I see the others mouths turning up as well.

Then Azriel decides to move next to me, despite the also empty spot next to Mor, and sits down.

He doesn’t seem embarrassed, as he moves as close as possible to me.

I shift in my seat nervously, as his body heat and scent radiates onto my own.

“Hey buddy, why are you clinging to y/n so much huh?” Cassian asks, a wide smirk plastered on his face, and I glare at him.

“Yeah Az, please elaborate on this sudden infatuation with our dear friend y/n here” Mor adds, and I shoot her a glare too.

“What do you mean sudden…” Azriel responds shortly, as he turns his head to her.

Feyre and Mor gasp in shock, and Nesta chuckles as I blush badly.

“She’s so beautiful…” he mumbles, pushing some hair off my shoulder.

I sit completely still, as I feel his piercing gaze on me.

I hear Cassian struggle not to laugh his ass off, and I see the others grinning like hell.

“Hey Az…maybe we should go back” I say, turning to look at him.

“No don’t leave yet” Mor whines.

“No it’s fine, I’ll take him with me to my cottage. I promised to be the responsible parent right?” I say smiling a little.

“Maybe she’s right. I think Azriel needs to go to bed” Rhys agrees.

“Fine…” Mor sighs in defeat, and I smile a little.

Then I turn to Azriel again, moving to stand up. He rises from his seat, and I follow.

“Come on big guy…” I say as I link my arm in his and walk for the exit.

“Have fun!” Cassian winks and I flip him off.

The others laugh as I lead Azriel out of Rita’s.

——————

We arrive at my small cottage and I stumble us inside.

I flip off my heels and drag Azriel with me upstairs. Then I lead him into his bedroom and sit him on the bed.

As I try to walk away, he grabs my waist, pulling me in between his legs. I steady my hands on his shoulders in response.

He then rubs circles with his thumbs in soothing motion, and I tug my hair behind my ears.

His hands move up to my waist and up to my bare back again, pushing me closer to him. My thighs are touching his, and my hands have moved to rest comfortably on his neck and shoulders.

“I’m sorry for making you angry” he apologizes.

“I’m not angry Az” I answer him.

“You’re not?” He questions.

“No. I was annoyed with you, but not anymore” I tell him, as I move a hand to stroke his cheek.

He smiles slightly.

“Good”

One of his hands move to my neck, pulling it down towards his face. I follow his lead, leaning down.

He moves my face slowly towards his, before brining his lips to mine softly.

I’m taken back by surprise, but don’t hold back, as I get more comfortable. I decide to sit on his lap, and he immediately places his hands on my waist to keep me in place.

I kiss him passionately, keeping my hands on his face, to cup his cheeks.

But then I realize what I’m doing and pull away.

“Shit I shouldn’t have done that” I say, standing up from his lap.

“No y/n wait-“

“No you need to go to bed Azriel” I cut him off, striding towards the door.

“Y/n please” I hear him beg behind me, but I continue to walk out and into my own room.

When I get into my own bedroom, I shut the door closed, and throw myself on the bed.

I slip off my dress, and put an oversized t-shirt to sleep in. Then I force myself to go to sleep, pushing away all my feelings. And also the fact that Azriel is my fucking mate.

——————

I wake up and walk down into the kitchen. Azriel hasn’t woken up yet luckily.

I decide to grab some juice from the fridge, and drink straight from the bottle, before I hear steps entering the kitchen.

I don’t even turn around as his presence fills the room.

“Good morning…” he says quietly, heading over to where I’m standing.

“Morning” I respond shortly, not turning around.

He reaches the fridge and I turn around to face the counter, as he moves past me.

“Y/n about last night…I’m sorry” he starts to apologize.

“For what?” I ask boldly, my back still facing him.

“For leading you on, and making you kiss me. It was foolish of me” he admits, and I can feel him standing close.

“I wanted to kiss you” I say turning around, and leaning my back against the counter.

He only raises his eyebrows in shock and confusion.

“You were drunk, I just didn’t wanna take advantage of you” I continue, sitting up on the counter, my feet dangling off the edge.

My t-shirt is only long enough to cover my ass, so when I sit, it rises up my thighs. Azriel takes a notice of this and steals a glance at the bare skin of my thighs, before speaking.

“Well I appreciate that but uhm…actually I…” he stutters as he talks. Unusual.

“You what…” I urge for him to keep going.

He only walks closer to me, placing his hands on my thighs. I shiver at his touch, knowing his shadows can sense it.

“Say it Azriel…” I tell him as I wrap my arms around his neck.

“You’re my…” he hesitates.

I pull him closer to me, so our noses are barely touching.

“Mate” I finish for him, smashing my lips onto his.

He doesn’t think twice as his hands move to my waist, pulling me closer to him.

I keep my hands on his neck, running my fingers through his hair, as I kiss him passionately.

He’s so fucking good at this. His hands dig into my sides, and he opens his mouth, so I can slide my tongue in. And I do.

He kisses me more roughly, pulling and tugging at my shirt. His teeth graze my bottom lip as he slightly nibbles.

I pull away to catch my breath, only for him to crash his lips onto my neck instead.

I push my hair to one side, as he trails his tongue over my skin. Then he decides to start sucking instead. I let out a silent moan as he bites into my neck.

With that he pushes into me even more, making our lower abdomens graze each other.

“Y/n…” he groans, and I wrap my legs around his torso.

I pull his head up from my neck, so we’re face to face.

We make eye contact, and I move my hand to push some hair out of his face. Then I cup his cheeks, and lean in to place my forehead on his.

I close my eyes, and breathe in his scent and presence.

His hands rest on my hips, with my legs still wrapped loosely around him.

“I’m sorry…” he whispers.

I raise my head and open my eyes.

“For what?” I ask confused.

“For being such an idiot. I shouldn’t have let you get hurt, but I definitely shouldn’t have lashed out like I did. It’s just that you mean the world to me. If you get hurt, I get hurt. If you die, I die” he answers.

I can’t help but feel bad for him. He’s genuinely hurting because of this.

“Azriel…you mean the world to me too. Believe me, I wouldn’t have held back if you got inured either. It just upset me that you didn’t listen to me when I told you it was fine” I say, stroking his cheek soothingly with my thumb.

“I know love…and I promise I’ll listen you next time. Can you forgive me?” He asks, regret shining his eyes.

“There is nothing to forgive…” I answer, leaning in slowly to give his lips a comforting kiss.

He doesn’t stop me as I kiss him. This time the kiss is not filled with lust and hunger, but pure love and longing.

As I pull away again, I keep my hands on his neck, and he keeps mine on my hips.

“Breakfast?” I ask him softly, trailing fingers through his hair.

“Mhm” he nods, and leans in to give another quick and loving kiss.

We both smile through the kiss, and I feel every part of my body relaxing at his touch.

——————

“You know we’re gonna get bullied for centuries for this?” I say, as I take a bite of my fried egg toast.

“Oh trust me I know…Cassian is going to be a big pain in the ass to say the least” Azriel replies, as he eats too.

“As long as I get to have you all for mysel” I say, a hint of seduction in my voice.

He just cocks an eyebrow at me knowingly, and I take another bite of my food.

“We don’t have anything important planned today right…” he asks, not looking up at me, as he sips his juice.

“No I don’t think so…why?” I ask curiously.

He just shrugs, and I give him a playful look.

“I’m glad you moved in here with me…” I say, finishing my food.

“Me too…” he trails off as he also finishes up.

I grab my plate and cup, heading over to the sink to wash it. I hear Azriel following me from behind.

As I wash my dishes, he comes up behind me, placing his own in the sink. I wash his too, as his hands start to roam my body.

Still wearing my t-shirt, he presses into my back, running his hands up my thighs. I can already fell my body aching for him.

I truly underestimated the whole mating thing. When Rhys and Feyre told me they basically fucked each other with no breaks for a week, I only laughed at them. But now I want nothing more than to let Azriel do the same to me.

As his hands smoothes over my bare skin, a shiver runs down my spine. He lifts my t-shirt up to my waist, exposing my underwear.

One of his hands trail under my shirt, up towards my breast, while the other goes to my ass.

I lean my head slightly back, closing my eyes. His lips move to the bare skin of my neck, licking and kissing.

When his hand finally reaches my breast, he cups it, running his finger smoothly over the already hardened nipple.

I let out a slight moan, as he touches the sensitive spot. He just smirks into my neck, as he starts to suck it.

My hands find their way to the counter, grabbing it harshly, my knuckles turning white.

I continue to let out several whimpers and slight moans, as his hand and tongue devour me.

Then his hips grind into my backside. His bulge grazing into my ass. With that we both let out loud moans.

——————

“I thought we had nothing planned today…” I breathe out as Azriel’s head in between my legs.

“We didn’t. But apparently Rhys did…” he murmurs into my skin.

“I’m gonna kill him” I say, thinking about the dinner we have to attend in one hour.

“Me and you both” Azriel agrees, before sliding his tongue into me, earning a loud moan.

——————

“Geez I can practically smell what you’ve been doing from over here” Cassian says, putting a hand over his nose jokingly.

Me and Azriel just landed in the front veranda of the House of Wind, all dressed up for the dinner Rhys insisted we have.

I shoot Cassian a death glare, bumping into him on purpose as I walk past him.

“For your own sake. Keep your mouth shut Cass” I hear Azriel tell him as he follows me inside.

Everyone is seated at the dinner table, all dressed up. I take a seat next to Nesta, Azriel sitting next to me. Cassian comes in a moment later, sitting himself beside his mate.

I suddenly notice everyone staring and grinning at me and Azriel. Of course they know. They’re our family.

“You enjoyed yourself today?” Rhys smirks widely.

“I will literally murder you” I threaten him, but he just laughs.

“Your bond is really fucking strong. It almost makes me dizzy” Mor adds, looking over at me and Azriel.

I knew the mating bond was strong, but not as strong as they’re implying.

“It enhances itself once it’s been fulfilled. That’s why we can sense it so easily” Amren explains, looking between me and Az.

“Well I wanna say congratulations y/n and Azriel. You both deserve it” Feyre smiles at us both.

She is way too kind to be mated with the arrogant, baby high lord, Rhys.

“Thank you” Azriel smiles slightly at her.

“So how did it all happen? What made you finally give in?” Rhys asks, as he pours himself some wine.

“Do you need to know all the details?” I raise my eyebrows at him.

He just smirks at me, taking a sip of his drink.

“It was me” Azriel speaks up from beside me.

Everyone turns their heads to him, including me.

“What do you mean Az?” Mor questions.

“My stupid drunken ass kissed her when we got home from Rita’s” he tells everyone.

Several gasps echoes through the room. I myself let out a little sound of surprise.

“Damn Az…I don’t expect that. How did you handle that y/n?” Cassian asks me.

They’re all looking at me. Awaiting my response.

“I kissed him back. Only for a few seconds though until I got my shit together” I say.

“And then you just went to sleep?” Nesta ask confused.

I nod my head at her.

The other seem kind of confused as well, looking at us weirdly.

“And then when I woke up, I kissed her again. But she didn’t resist me that time” Azriel smiles proudly.

I roll my eyes, and hit him in the arm playfully. He just stifles a laugh.

“And then what…” Feyre asks intrigued.

Rhys raises his eyebrows at his mate’s sudden interest. But she just keeps her gaze on me and Azriel.

“And then the bond snapped together. I think you know what happens next…” I say, grinning a bit at the last part.

Azriel goes red out of embarrassment at my slight exposing. Cassian just throws his head back with laughter, and the others snicker as well.

“Well I just lost my appetite” Amren says, pushing her plate away.

“Please like you were gonna eat any of that anyways” Mor tells her, still kind of laughing.

Amren just rolls her eyes and glares at her, but Mor doesn’t seem a tiny bit bothered.

As the laughter quiets down, everyone starts pouring food onto their plates. Except for Amren. And the conversation flows back to other things.

Azriel puts his hand on my thigh, letting it rest there. And I don’t feel a tiny bit uncomfortable, as I let it stay there for the rest of the dinner.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

#acotar #azriel x reader #azriel x you #inner circle #feysand #nessian #a court of thorns and roses #sarah j maas #fanfic

[captain039]

Stains of red

Astarion x omega!reader

Warnings: Vampire things, blood, light gore, witch things, fantasy things, swearing, age gap, heats, smut, shameless flirting, virgin reader, indulging in pleasure xD, pining, jealousy, possessiveness

I can’t wait for the game I must write. I’ve watched too many TikTok’s on him🤣 so I may not get his characteristic. But I have an idea on them lol.

No spoilers for the game cause I haven’t played it lol

The raven awoke you as he did all mornings, cawing on your window seal making you huff and almost throw your pillow at him.

“Must you?” You said and he just cawed flying into your house and landing on your bedside table.

“Good morning” you chuckled and Pax cawed in response.

“Any hostile creatures lurking?” You said and he just cawed again fluttering his wings slightly.

“Helpful” you rolled your eyes and stretched. You started your day as you always did, some tea and toasted bread with jam, sitting on the front porch watching Pax fly away back to his family. You saved Pax when he was a baby bird, ugly little thing really with no feathers, but you raised him and now he wakes you every morning and watched the forest for you. Though you didn’t understand him, he understood you well enough. The forest felt cold somehow today though, like something cold was lurking within it and feeding off its emotions, same feeling you got from a certain vampire. Ever since your parents died to a vampire, Astarion has apparently made it his duty to check on you. He wasn’t the one who killed your family, but he was the one to tear the other vampires head off in a craze. You’ll never forget the look in his eyes when he did, nor will you forget the softness he showed younger you. You practically grew up by yourself, self sustaining beyond measures, Astarion didn’t know a thing about children, yet he didn’t let any of the village members come. He brought you food, books, clothes, anything you needed till you got old enough to take care of yourself. Your teenage years were hard, a lonely omega presenting wasn’t ideal for anyone and you felt like the gods truely hated you in those times of your heats. Astarion was neither alpha, beta or omega, you supposed it was due to him being practically dead. He just had a simple cold smell, like snow if snow smelt like anything. Due to him being the only male around you’d ever see your teenage lust was after him, a man however many years old who raised you, sort of. You cursed the gods daily because of this lust, now thought it simmered deeper within your heart and you hated it.

“Why’re you looking so thoughtful?” You heard a hum in front of you and jumped seeing Astarion there.

“Gods sake Astarion!” You glared and he laughed.

“Darling, you should be aware of your surroundings” he huffed with a smirk and you rolled your eyes. Pet names, boy did he love his pet names, darling, sweetheart, dearest, sweet thing, whatever his mind could think of and it drive you insane.

“Why’re you here?” You asked frowning slightly at his scent, a woman’s scent, a beta, gods had he bedded and fed someone before coming here? You glanced to his mouth, no red stains or signs of feeding, he bedded her then. That was somehow worse.

“Can I not see you? I am hurt” he pouted and you sighed standing up and grabbing your plate and cup.

“I have not seen you in months” you didn’t mean to snap, but you did as you walked into your cottage, him following.

“Were you not in heat?” He said casually and you flushed. You were in heat, how the hell did he manage to know your cycle?

“I was” you grumbled going to the sink.

“Not that it affects you” you scoffed, why were you angry?

“Why’re you angry sweetest?” He asked leaning against the counter beside you, tilting his head.

“I’m not angry” you lies washing your cup and plate before drying them.

“You’re also a terrible liar” he huffed. You turned abruptly and huffed at him before a knock came. He snapped his head to the door alerted, eyes narrowing.

“It’s just one of the villagers probably” you rolled your eyes at the vampire and opened the door. A villager indeed, only his fingers were missing.

“Gods what happened?” You asked.

“I was chopping some wood I got distracted by something, I was putting the wood down and left me hand there!” He said and you gulped.

“Right” you said turning around seeing Astarion staring at the man’s fingers.

“Astarion” you said softly and he snapped his head to yours mouth slightly agape. He snarled and went to your room while you took the man to your other room. You were a witch of sorts, you knew few spells, mainly healing ones, hence why the villagers came.

“Sit down” you said and the man sat down. You recognised him as the butchers son, a handsome young alpha, not to sharp though apparently. You made him hold his hand on the table and began chanting softly. You moved your hands around, watching the yellow glow emit from them and swirl around his fingers. Soon enough they were back and normal apart from the blood stains.

“There” you smiled.

“Thank you so much miss” he smiled softly a slight flush to his cheeks.

“Idiot” you heard and turned to glare at Astarion in the door way.

“Excuse him he has no manners” you huffed and cocked your head at the vampire who huffed and left.

“I can’t thank you enough miss” the alpha said still flushed as he shook your hand.

“It’s alright, just don’t do it again” you laughed lightly.

“Course, I was wondering-“ he stopped mid sentence glancing to something behind you and gulped.

“Thank you” he said and disappeared quickly.

“What did you do?” You turned to Astarion who shrugged.

“He’s a perfectly nice man!” You growled and went to clean up the blood.

“He was clearly trying to fuck you” Astarion said with a scoff and you flushed and froze.

“Excuse me?” You said as you scrubbed the blood a little harshly.

“Fuck you darling, bed you, a night of pleasure?” He said like you were stupid.

“I know what it is!” You said voice going higher.

“Have you still not had someone bed you?” He said voice teasing almost though something was strange about his tone. You threw out the rag and briskly walked past him to avoid that conversation. He scared off half the village! and you were in love with him for gods sake!

“Get out my house” you huffed turning and pointing to the door.

“I just got here” he huffed.

“I don’t care” you pointed to the door again.

“So dull” he whined, but left making you sigh in relief.

You watched the firefly’s over the small lake you had in front of your house. Nice clear spring, perfect in any weather it truely was a blessing. Sometimes if it was a warm night you’d go out for a swim with little clothing, enjoy the water under the warm night sky. It was a warm night and you felt like you could use a swim. You finished tea and changed into a robe and grabbed a towel. You laid the towel by the bed of the lake and glanced around before slipping your robe off and stepping in. You walked out a bit before resting on your back and sighing, eyes closing and tuning your ears into the wild life. You could hear critters scurrying around to grab their nightly meal, an owl nearby hooting softly, a few rabbits hoping along the ground and- footsteps? You lowered your body back into the water and glanced around, you couldn’t see anyone even with your heightened senses. You listened closer, two footsteps one heavy and one extremely light, the heavy one sounded like they were running. Then you heard a scream and blocked out the noise by covering your ears quickly before the smell of blood floated on the wind. You quickly left the lake and put on your towel before rushing inside and locking the door. You panted harshly missing the red eyes that watched you through the window.

Next part ->

#astarion x reader #Astarion #vampires #fantasy #x reader #aob #witch reader

[slut4msby]

the atsumu hny was super cute !!! loved It sm !! I hope you had an amazing new year's celebration!! was jus wondering if you could write something w samu or maybe Kita Shinsuke (24) rice farmer ? btw inarizaki #1 forever 💯

high school sweethearts. kita shinsuke x fem!reader

+ tags & warnings; fluff for a change of scenery & reader has a kid

+ a/n; I READ THIS AND WENT INSANE OMG I COULD TALK ABT KITA SHINSUKE (24) RICE FARMER FOR EVER. Fun little piece of lea slut4msby lore, when I first watched season 4 I had not read the manga yet and when Kita first came on screen i went insane. Also Kita and I are legally married?? My friends through a fake wedding for me because I was so in love with this man. And pls keep the Inarizaki reqs/asks/anything coming bc i am INSANE about inarizaki (i am normal i swear) <3

You couldn’t help peer out the window of your shared home with your husband. He was outside with your 5 year old son, playing some volleyball. Your son had never taken a liking to sports until your husband began cleaning out his old stuff, stumbling upon his jersey from his high school years. He would never admit and you would never bring it up but he did get emotional looking back at these days.The days where he led one of the greatest teams, not on the main roster, but he was still aware of the impact he had on the boys. He wasn’t the worst player but nothing notable, however Shinsuke had the power to put anyone at ease and you loved that about him.

Shinsuke never showed much self-confidence when the two of you had met in your first year. It’s not that he didn't have the confidence he just never felt the need to show it, and you appreciated that about him. You appreciate how no matter what Shinsuke was straight the point, you appreciated his need for routine, which has really helped your home life. You appreciate how he loves, how he cares for others. Kita Shinsuke was the perfect man.

However, despite how lucky you feel to have Shinsuke in your life. He feels even more lucky for you, he knows you are his soulmate from the day he met you in the first year. He felt as if all the work he had ever done paid off, he felt like the luckiest man in the world. At the beginning it was just a hallway class, the girl from class 1-6. Having your classes next to each other & both being in advanced classes meant the both of you would have recurring meetings. The next thing he knows, Aran had recruited you as the volleyball clubs manager as the team wouldn’t shut up about not having one. Shinsuke then began spending everyday with you, which turned to every waking second he was with you whenever he could be. He was your best friend, right?

That’s what you had thought. You would have never admitted your crush on Kita that began growing. However his admiration for you began sprouting. He loved the way you smiled, how you got along with everyone, took care of yourself and others, how you tie your shoelaces, how you set out  your notebook, how you played with your hair when you were nervous and how you didn’t seem to fear anything. Unlike him. Kita had put his feelings behind him, until he decided it was now or never, graduation. It was cliche, Shinsuke knew that. He had gotten you a bouquet of flowers, you had mentioned your favourite flowers in a passing conversation the second week of the second year. A useless piece of information, Shinsuke remembered that. Why wouldn’t he? He loved you. That day to Kita’s surprise, you said yes. You agreed to be his girlfriend.

Now, almost 10 years later. Shinsuke was your husband. Those flowers he had given you on graduation day you had pressed, they stayed on display in your kitchen, as well as a photo of you and Shinsuke the day your son was born. Now Shinsuke spent his days as a rice farmer instead of a volleyball player. However seeing him playing with your son reminded you of the man you fell in love with. 

You snapped out of a trance when your son called out to you, “Mum! Look! Dad taught me how to play volleyball like he used to.” You couldn’t help but smile, “He said I was really 

good! Mum, can I start playing volleyball! I wanna be like dad!.”

You turn towards Shinsuke, he looked so amused at the scenario. You jokingly roll your eyes at him, “of course you can baby!” You said planting a kiss on your son's forehead. “How about for now you and daddy go get cleaned up?”

“Okay!” Your son responds with a toothy smile, before your son begins pulling your husband down the hallway.

You felt like the luckiest woman alive.

©slut4msby

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu drabbles #haikyuu angst #hq x reader #hq #haikyuu #inarizaki #kita shinsuke #shinsuke kita #kita x reader #haikyuu fluff #hq fluff #kita shinsuke x reader #shinsuke kita x reader

[lfghughes]

Heaven Can’t Help Me Now | Trevor

a/n: hahahaha i loved writing this and somehow my emotions are all over the place with the chaos this is.

“Trevor, I just want to sleep. Please shut up.” You grumbled as you shifted in your plane seat away from him. He had been nonstop talking since the moment you two had met up at five a.m for this trip and he was driving you insane. “Clearly someone is not a morning person.” He huffed as he grabbed one of the airplane blankets, unfolding it and placing it over you. “Here, get comfortable.” His words made you open your eyes just slightly and you noticed him shifting  in his seat so you could basically use him as a pillow. “Finally you’re being useful.” You grumbled as you tucked yourself into his side, his arm going around you. 

That was really the last thing you remembered because you fell asleep quickly but once the plane landed and you had to wake up you were in a much better mood. You stretched out your body, excited to get off this plane and finally use your legs on solid ground. “Is the princess more approachable now?” Trevor teased and you just rolled your eyes. The first stop after the plane trip was the hotel you two would be staying at and then you knew the other boys would meet up with you there.

As you walked into the hotel room you two would be sharing a look of confusion grew on your face. “Oh did you end up getting a separate room?” Back home you two had decided you were both okay with sharing a room and just getting two full beds but this was clearly just a one king bed. “Shit, no. I booked the two beds.” Trevor cursed as he looked through his phone at the reservations he made. “It’s fine, I’m sure Jack or Cole will let me crash in their bed.” 

All you could do was shrug in response and then you decided suddenly that it wasn’t a big deal. This was Trevor. You had just used him as a body pillow on the plane. “I mean we can share not a big deal. Just don’t hog the blankets, snore, or take up the whole bed. Also I don’t know if you sleep naked but you won’t be tonight.” You listed off the rules. Trevor nodded his head and it looked like you two were in agreement. “I’m going to check if the other boys are here.”

“Okay, I’m going to call Jamie and let him know we’re here safe.” As soon as Trevor exited the room, you called Jamie and it didn’t take long for him to respond. “Hey, we got here safe. Miss you already.” You playfully pouted on the video chat and he laughed. “Miss you too but I’m glad you both got there safely. Hey, real quick, is Trevor with you?” He asked and you shook your head. At this response he continued on “When you get back do you think we could talk about last night?”

“Yeah, of course.” You knew you both needed to talk about this and you weren’t about to avoid this conversation. Before either of you could say more the bedroom door opened and all three boys stumbled in and they were loud as always. “Bye Jamie, talk to you later.” You waved and the three boys came over to the camera to wave goodbye. The rest of the afternoon was fun, you got to go out with all the boys and you got a good laugh at their coordinating outfits, taking photos for them to post.

After that you all also decided to go out for some drinks and it was genuinely one of the most fun nights you had in a while. You were also very aware of the cameras consistently around recording and taking pictures and you knew that there would be a wildfire of rumors later on because there was going to be plenty of videos of Trevor with an arm around you or his hand in yours.

It was close to two am when both of you had stumbled back into your hotel room in a pitch of giggles. “Alright, let me go get changed.” You told him as you went to the bathroom, changing into much more comfortable sleep clothes before sliding into the bed. Both of you laid there in silence until Trevor turned the tv on. Of course the peacefulness didn’t last long as he purposely started to annoy you. He tugged most of the blankets onto his side, one of the main rules you gave him.

“Trevor, you’re hogging blankets.” You complained as you tried tugging them back and a giggle left your lips as his arm swooped you up and closer to him. “What are you cold, baby girl?” He teased, man did you really hate him sometimes. Okay, definitely not hate but he knew how to be annoying that was for sure. You were very aware suddenly of how his arm was still around and how his body curled around you. 

“This is much more comfortable.” He whispered and again you felt that thump in your heart like you had the night before with Jamie. You shifted your body so you could look at him and he didn’t look like he was anywhere ready to go to sleep. Instead his hand went to the side of your face as he leaned over, pressing his lips on yours. There wasn’t much thinking on your end except well Trevor was a really good kisser and you didn’t want to stop.

Your lips moved against his as he shifted his body so he was slightly hovering over you. The kiss was somehow between cautious and passionate and as his hands explored your body, it felt like you were suddenly on fire. You knew you two had been making out for a long while when you pulled away. “We should go to sleep, Z or else neither of us are making it out of this bed tomorrow morning.” You pointed out and he let out a small groan of frustration.

“I would definitely be okay with staying in bed with you tomorrow all day.” He pointed out but moved back over onto his side of the bed, still pulling you to his body. Again you sank into him comfortably but once he had fallen asleep with his arm around you was when the reality hit you of the situation. Jamie had almost kissed you yesterday and just now you had made out with Trevor. What in the hell did you just get yourself into?

#trevor zegras #trevor zegras blurb #trevor zegras x reader #trevor zegras imagine #( heaven cant help me now ft jamie & trevor )

[ash-and-starlight]

Books of 2023

the list nobody asked for <3

My reading habits had gone a bit stagnant in the past couple of years so this year i made the effort to engage in reading again and wow books really are good!! who would have thought! Sharing this year's book log with the small reviews i did while reading yeah i am That kind of list lover if u feel like being nosy, (and maybe even help mi crowdsource reading recs based on my likes 👀🤲?)

The left Hand of Darkness - Ursula K. Le Guin Ursula i Need to know your thoughts on omegaver- [gunshot] THAT ASIDE yeah. mrs Le Guin you've done it again. I can see why everyone got their brain chemistry altered by this book.

The Membranes - Chi Ta-Wei another brain chemistry altering book. would love to discuss it with a gender studies major lmao

Satanic Verses - Salman Rushdie its a v atmospheric and poignant story, I know I would have loved it more if I was familiar with the rich religious/cultural background it draws from

The Masquerade Series - Seth Dickinson Crazy insane in the membrane about this series. one of the most compelling worldbuildings I've ever seen, and most importantly it features one of the most crazy wet pathetic scrunkly meow meow protagonists i've ever had the pleasure of reading about.

Middlesex - Jeffrey Eugenides i liked the writing style of this book a lot! idk how well it holds up re: intersexuality topic, but its a very engaging read.

Dead Blondes and Bad Mothers: Monstrosity, Patriarchy, and the Fear of Female Power - Jude Ellison, Sady Doyle The title says it all honestly, its a beautiful, thought provoking and engaging essay, spanning eras, pop culture phenomenons, and real life events on the topic of women and horror.

The cat who saved books - Sōsuke Natsukawa this was so cute and heartfelt, it will really make you go Ah Yes, this is Why we Love Books <333

The Locked Tomb Series - Tamsyn Muir now when people say there is a girl who is the cursed sacrifice of 2000 infants who falls in love with the sleeping embodiment of the soul of the Earth (barbie) and also another girl who is the only survivor of the aforementioned sacrifice and is. a Jesus metaphor? and also the two girls become one at some point. and every book is a different genre. and god is bisexual. and memes survived the nuclear apocalypse. I can just nod and say so true.

The Area X Trilogy - Jeff VanderMeer Rotating this series in the microwave of my mind at the speed of light it's soSO GOOD!! the movie doesn't even come close honestly u NEED to read the books. and then go touch grass and be aware of every strand in a completely new way.

The Dawn of Yangchen - F. C. Yee nice read! I was more invested in the worldbuilding crumbs than in the actual story lmao, I will forever think about the HEATED airball rivalry between the air temples and about the swt greetings / bethrotal armbands.

Inuit Stories of Being and Rebirth: Gender, Shamanism, and the Third Sex - Bernard Saladin d'Anglure starting w a disclaimer bc I feel like the topic of native colonization was ignored when it should have been way more prominent when talking about the context of where and when these testimonies were collected?? That aside it was very interesting and well put together, with first account testimonies of Inuit elders about their myths, lifestyles and beliefs.

Pachinko - Min Jin Lee i read the book after having seen the tv series (which i also rlly recommend). Very moving story about a family and its generations, from Korea under Japanese colonization to modern day America.

Her body and other parties - Carmen Maria Marchado sometimes I go about my day then I remember this book exists and stare at the wall for 30 minutes.

Dictionnaire de l'impossible - Didier Van Cauwelaert big miss. this collection of articles about "strange impossible phenomenons" sounded so quirky and interesting but i sure would have loved if the author hadnt so clearly picked a side. and also way too much church for my tastes.

He who Drowned the World - Shelley Parker Chan Im not even gonna speak about this one if you've followed me since july you know what pits of insanity and despair i'm in

Tomorrow and Tomorrow and Tomorrow - Gabrielle Zevin Sometimes!! the book with pretty covers put in the "famous on socials" bookstore section!! are good!! It's about being othered it's about connection it's about diaspora it's about love and friendship and most of all it's about viddy games.

Station Eleven - Emily St. John Mandel reading this post-covid and learning it was written in 2017 was A TRIP. Psychic damage at every page. still feeling very normla.

The Mask of Apollo - Mary Renault Ugh i desperately wanted to like this book because the setup is so interesting and full of potential, but the end result was just. flat. flat story flat characters the plot focusing on the wrong things at the wrong times i was so DONE when i reached the end otz.

Babel - R. F. Kuang LOVED the worldbuilding in this, the "lost in translation" system of magic is one of the most interesting things ive ever read. I think theres something about the writing in general that didn't win me over completely?? but all in all a very good

Red Ocean - Han Song This sure is a Book. That i've Read. its so profundly strange and unlike anything ive come across that i dont even know what to feel about it. i think 90% of my confusion comes from Not Getting Cultural References so if someone has a "red ocean explained" essay plz send it my way bc i couldnt find one.

#taking with me into next year Chromorama and The seven moons of Maali Almeida #anyway blease talk to me about your fave books!! #or about the ones in this list!! #send post #books

[scifirice]

The game Doomed in danny phantom has insane implications.

Before you go typing stuff, I am aware it's the result of needing a video game to have stakes and the writers needing a plot. I understand watsonian and doylist reasoning, im a writer myself. this is purely for the in-universe implications which I believe are crazy.

In episode 12: Teacher of the Year, danny and his friends are playing some kind of online game where the grand prize for beating it is full access to the World Wide Web. I re watched this episode prior to writing this, though it has been a hot minute since ive seen the other episodes, so i don't know exactly if they've actually used the internet prior to that episode. But i do remember technus escaping because Danny deleted his old save of Doomed so i guess that does imply he beat it at some point after episode 12.

The mere fact they can even play an online game in the first place would imply they have some access but not as much as they could. Kind of like how when you have a learners permit you can only drive in the daytime with an adult in the passenger seat. Can you imagine getting online and only being able to access wikipedia and facebook? Thats what I'm seeing from this.

So as far as we know, anyone who wants to get full access to the internet has to play and beat this game. We see danny and tucker make it to the final level multiple times, it takes them all night but that assumes even an average player can make it far if they keep at it. So the game itself couldn't be too difficult.

But what bewilders me the most is what Sam's doing. Why does this game have PVP? Sam hasn't beat the game either, she was likely doing it just to fuck with danny and tucker but she also blasts some random dude at the beginning. The trio seemed to all be able to win the game together at the very end, meaning there isn't any actual reason for pvp since there's no need to claim the prize solely for yourself.

Then there's Lancer. He's already beating the goddamn game! Yet he comes back just to beat it again and fight people! Is he gaining anything from this? Probably not. But why would this be an option for returning players? It's like someone who gets a doctorate degree and then goes around a middle school with a baseball bat bashing any student they see trying to learn and the school staff do nothing about it.

Why is the world set up like this? Did the government decide full internet access is something someone should have to take a test for? Did everyone have to take the test or were they grandfathered into keeping full access? I dunno how old Lancer is but unless we assume he was only playing the game for fun, he had to have beat Doomed when he was younger. so that implies his generation and the one after were all subject to this rule.

Is Doomed the only game like this? are there other games for other kinds of people since not everyone is good at FPS games? Could there be other things like make a character on the sims live for a whole year on max difficulty and then you win? Beat halo on legendary with all skulls on? speedrun mario 64 below the allowed time limit? Whose idea was this!? Not everyone is going to want full access when they're teens like danny, but what about when you get a job? Do you need to put "I beat Doomed" on your resume? this whole this is just fucking bizzare,

It's a minor detail never really brought up again, but the wider implications of it are immense. Anyway, im using this episode as inspiration to write a story because I cannot let this idea just get swept under the ecto-rug.

#danny phantom #I'm not even a big dp fan but someone pointed this out to me once and i can't get past the implications it has

[possibilistfanfiction]

conservationist au already!? you write so fast dang (what are your secrets) (also it's okay if you want to keep them secret) (mostly i am excite for frog)

here she is! frog au! lol [ao3]

//

to see us blossom (while the green spreads like wings)

//

only our feet have been here, that i'm aware of. it's wild and remote and beautiful as can be. i just want to be quiet and love it. let it sink in. i'll be leaving the planet, sometime. and i'll miss it.

— dr. bruce means

//

'dr. silva,' diego bursts into your office, his hair fluffed and messy, 'i found someone for the expedition!'

'did you... run here?'

'yeah, from the lab.' he gulps a breath. 'i got excited.'

it's fucking awesome that diego, your favorite grad student, is coming on this expedition, but it's becoming a huge pain in the ass to plan — you try your hardest not to feel guilty about why, but it is mostly because of you — and is starting to feel more and more impossible by the day. you don't want to get your hopes up: you don't have that much funding, and it's starting to seem a little bit impossible logistically, even with dr. superion's help. but you'll humor him: 'so who are we taking with us?'

he waits a breath, practically bursting at the seams. 'beatrice zhang.'

'the photographer?'

'she's an experienced climber! you follow her on instagram, right?'

you have gratuitously followed beatrice zhang on instagram for the last four years — for her photography, because it is some of the most beautiful and thoughtful you've ever seen, regardless of the subject matter, but also for the occasional photo of herself, surfing or climbing or behind the camera, particularly delightful if it features her arms in a tank — but diego doesn't need to know that part. 'yes, her work is wonderful for lots of conservationist efforts.' diplomatic, you think, mentally patting yourself on the back.

'and she's hot.'

'i didn't say that.'

diego rolls his eyes.

'anyway, how would we even get her to come with us?'

diego grins. 'i emailed her.'

'what?'

he takes out his phone and shows you her instagram, which, indeed, does have an ‘email’ button, which, obviously, you've never paid attention to before. 'she hasn't responded yet, or her team or whatever, i guess, but i only sent it ten minutes ago. and it went to a legit address and hasn't bounced back, so, i just figured, why not?'

even though, last year, you had had a successful time in guyana, finding and recording a few new species, there are a lot of why not's, really: your GA probably shouldn’t be making these choices without consulting you first, but you don’t really care about that so much as your mobility is more limited than ever lately. the weather probably won't hold so who the fuck knows if it'll even be possible to reach to spot at all. and, plus, it's for a frog. one tiny frog, that may or may not exist — (you're sure it does) — in the middle of a jungle on the top of a tepui that's never been climbed. it's... a little crazy, when you think through it now, way crazier than it had seemed when you wrote the grant for funding last year. most people, even world renowned war-turned-wildlife photographers with insane biceps — especially them, probably — aren't interested in a project like this.

'well, the least that will happen is she doesn't respond,' you figure; you don't believe in any religion and life had dealt you quite the shitty hand for a long time, so if there's any balancing it out, maybe this will be a strike in the good column for you. so, 'yeah, you're right. why not?'

/

it's two days later when your phone vibrates about seven times; you roll over in... some girl's bed? okay, solid night, then, and when you look over at her, she's beautiful and fast asleep. you remember your fifth shot of tequila and vaguely how great riding her dick had been; you find your phone graciously plugged into a charger on the nightstand on your side of the bed, and when you go to the bathroom you see condoms in the small trash can — so, all in all, a success. your back is sore but not terrible and you groan when you see it's only six am, but there's texts from diego and you have a policy not to ignore those, no matter how stupid they occasionally can be.

these are unequivocally not stupid, though, because they start with dr. silva! and then ava!!!!! ava! and devolve into some emojis and then omg oh my god and finally check your email, which is really the only helpful part of that — but they're not stupid because when you do check your email, you see a forwarded message from diego first. it's a cordial reply to the email he had sent to beatrice zhang, from her, it seems, asking politely to be put in touch with the lead biologist on the expedition if possible. which, you remember with the tiniest bit of a happy jolt, is you. you open the newest email, which is, in fact, connecting you and beatrice. she’s already responded, and it’s kind of wild because, from the three short sentences asking if you could set up a video chat to talk more about the expedition or, if she happened to be close to where you were in the world, even meet near your office or lab for coffee, she sounds, well, at least interested. you don't think someone like her — someone who has photographed war, and famine, and wildfires, and, miraculously last year, a snow leopard and her cub — would even respond to something she didn't care at all about.

holy shit, you text diego. you need a cup of coffee, or, like, maybe three cups of coffee, and a breakfast sandwich before you can respond to that email, so you decide to get a move on. plus, it feels unhinged to respond to it from your phone, so you need to go home anyway. you should also maybe definitely shower, you think, as you look at yourself in the mirror: your makeup is a little smudged and your hair is an unrepentant mess. still hot though, you think when you quietly find your clothes and put your bra on, a deep teal that makes your boobs look awesome. thankfully, you were just in high-waisted, loose jeans and a cropped sweater last night, so after you wash your face and get dressed, it's not really giving walk of shame — walk of pride, thank you very much.

you google maps where you are and, thankfully, it's a nice enough morning and a short enough distance that you can walk to your favorite cafe and then to your apartment without having to call an uber. you grab your cane from where you'd left it propped up by the wall near the bed, and then, because you're definitely not an asshole, gently shake your, well, one night stand's shoulder. her eyes are green, and you do remember that much.

'i gotta go do some work, sorry.'

she nods. 'right. doctor.'

well, maybe you're a little bit of an asshole, but it's not your fault that people think you're a very important neurosurgeon or something. you are very important in cataloguing biodiversity, so you just roll with it. 'thanks for a great time.'

she nods with a soft smile, and it's nice to kiss her, gently, goodbye.

/

'wait, you're meeting with her? here?'

'yes,' you say, mostly annoyed at camila's vaguely unhinged energy. 'she's close by train, so it's better to meet in person.'

'oh my god,' camila says. she's one of your best friends and probably the smartest, most tech-savvy person you know. when you figured out how helpful it would be to have someone operate drones for you on this expedition, you hadn't even bothered to ask anyone else.

'don't you know her?'

'well, sure,' camila confirms. 'i did some drone work for her a few months ago in the bahamas when she was photographing sharks. but, like, she's amazing, ava.'

'well, hopefully she'll say yes.'

'you'll have to charm her.'

'i'm very good at charming hot women.'

camila rolls her eyes.

'i'm also very good at charming people to go find frogs with me.'

she waits for a beat and then relents. 'well, i suppose that's true.'

'come on,' you say, 'help me make a slide deck. i feel like she'd think that's sexy or something.'

'you're ridiculous.'

'it'll work, i'm telling you.'

/

beatrice zhang in soft wool pants and closed-toed birkenstocks and a crewneck sweater sitting ramrod straight at the decent cafe just off campus near your office is, quite honestly, not a sight you'd ever expected to see, but it is kind of a miracle. or, at least that's what it had felt like, when she had emailed that she was, actually, a few hours away by train and wouldn't mind a day trip to meet in person. you're glad that you wore your best professor outfit today, flared navy slacks that make your ass look divine, and a crisp white button up that you tucked in tight and rolled up at the sleeves, a camel peacoat and expensive loafers that dr. salvius had gotten you when you passed your dissertation two years ago. you usually wear... well, not this — you reserve this for conferences and presentations — but, if looking professional helps beatrice sign onto this project, so be it.

and, well, maybe it's not strictly professional to undo another button as you had walked to the cafe, and, like, you don't actually know if beatrice is gay or not, but you spot her and smile and wave and her eyes get big for a moment, and you’re afraid you’ve got it all wrong: you’re small and young and pretty and, sometimes, people think that disqualifies you from being smart. but then her eyes rake over you and linger, for just a moment, on your chest, so you're probably right. if this helps too, so be it.

you wave and she stands very formally; she clearly recognizes you, which makes you feel a small thrill of satisfaction. 'hey, glad you found it okay.'

'i've had much more difficult locations to navigate before, although the freshman can be a bit scary.'

it's deadpan, so it takes you a split second, but then you laugh and offer your hand. 'i'm dr. silva.' you want to roll your eyes at your title, which you normally feel quite proud of, all of a sudden. 'ava, any pronouns.'

'dr. silva,' she says anyway, and shakes your hand firmly. 'it's a pleasure. i'm beatrice, she/her.'

only after do you sit, a little sprawled, and prop your cane up on the table, does she sit too, and then looks down at the menu. 'do you recommend anything? i haven't had lunch yet.'

'well, if you're like, uh... —' falling prey to diet culture, you think, but you don't know beatrice at all, so — 'wanting a vegetable forward option, their salads and quinoa bowls are okay.'

she wrinkles her nose. you hide a smile in the collar of your coat.

'but their kimchi fried chicken sandwich is my favorite.'

'and the slaw?'

'well, i'm a fries girl.'

she smiles over the top of her menu, just slightly.

'but my friend likes the slaw, and i trust her.'

she nods and sets her menu down, her wrists resting on the edge of the table, her hands clasped. a practical smart watch, no wedding band. her full attention is on you and it makes you feel a little breathless.

you're saved from saying something incredibly dumb — you're very, very smart, and you're actually very good at flirting, but beatrice zhang is hot as hell and a certified badass and you also really want her to be, like, your colleague — when your server comes to your table. you both order, and you get the fried chicken sandwich too, even though you already ate lunch an hour ago — diego's always happy to eat your leftovers out of the fridge in the lab anyway.

you're not saved from saying something marginally dumb, though, because beatrice kindly thanks your server and hands over her menu and then looks at you again, fully focused.

'i like your hair,’ you say, instead of, well, anything else. you want to groan and slam your head down into the table, or something, because beatrice's brows knit together and she brings one hand to run through her floppy middle part, short in the back and on the sides, pushing it out of her eyes.

'oh,' she says, softly and definitely confused. 'thank you.'

you're sure you're blushing. 'sorry, i just, like, the last time you posted — you had long hair.'

it's mortifying, the moment you say it, because you can mentally calculate the last time beatrice posted a picture of herself on her instagram, and it was definitely over a year ago.

she also seems to realize this, because her confusion turns to a smug little smile that could probably eat you alive. you'd definitely let it.

'i read about the last species of frog you discovered, when the article came out.'

that was also over a year ago, and you laugh, tension releasing from your shoulders. 'so that’s how you knew what i looked like.’

‘sure.’

to be fair, the article did include a picture of you, muddy and sweaty and overjoyed, holding a tiny frog in the palm of your hand, but, ‘did you google me?’

‘i only take on projects, at this point, that i find interesting.’

‘so you think i’m interesting.’

she raises a brow, a scar that also wasn’t there over a year ago running an inch above it and then straight through, cleanly healed but not faded yet, stopping right on the top of her cheek — thankfully your brain didn't comment on that, even though it's kind of hot too. ‘i think that fact that you've already identified six new species of frog two years into an assistant professorship is interesting.’

'so that's a yes.' you grin. ‘want me to tell you about the project, then?'

she thanks your server when he brings her water and your lemonade of the day, and a coffee, and then leans forward in her seat. ‘yes,' she says. 'i do.’

you tell her about it as coherently as you can: you're sure there's a brand new species of frog — maybe more than one, if you're lucky — on the top of a land mass deep in the forest in guyana. you've secured enough funding to make it happen; bare bones, but still. you have diego and yasmine, your grad students, and michael, another assistant professor in your apartment who's helped you on expeditions before, mostly by carrying a bunch of shit. you've gotten camila — who beatrice is also very excited to work with again — to sign on to do tech work for you. dr. superion and dr. salvius are helping from here.

'so, anyway, i need you to climb the tepui.'

beatrice sits back when you're done, flicks through a few slides on your laptop that you'd handed to her with pictures of the jungle, the cliff face, the budget outlines and logistics and equipment you anticipate you'll need.

'do you know a lot about climbing?'

it's kind — to not assume that you don't; to not expect you to either. you shake your head no.

'i'm an alpinist, for the most part,' she says, 'which means that i climb, well —' she pauses.

'no need to be modest for me.'

she offers a small smile. 'i've climbed eight of the ten tallest mountains in the world.'

hot, you think, but you take a deep breath instead and say, 'that's impressive.' nailed it.

'yes, well.' she blushes. 'thank you. but this kind of climbing is traditional climbing — big wall climbing.'

'oh.' you frown. 'so, you can't do it?'

'i can,' she says, 'and i'd like to. i think i know enough of biology to be marginally helpful, and i can certainly photograph the expedition.'

your heart soars, warming your whole body, and you take a bite of your lukewarm sandwich to hide your smile.

'but i'll need a team. i'm confident that i'll be able to get up the wall, but i'm not experienced enough at this kind of climbing to lead on all of these passes.'

'we might not have the funds to pay much, if you bring on more people.'

she shakes her head. 'i have access to plenty of discretionary funds, so that shouldn't be a problem.'

'that's hot.' well, you tried.

she laughs, thank god. 'i just wanted to make sure that you and your team are okay with me bringing other people on.'

'as long as they aren't, like, shitty, you know. racist, homophobic, ableist. all that stuff.'

she nods, very seriously. 'i can assure you that, while one of my climbing partners is inclined to be an asshole, it's always done with respect toward important identities. she's more annoying than anything. and my other partner is the best person i know.'

'well, other than me, now.'

you can tell beatrice is torn between smiling and rolling her eyes; she does a bit of both. 'and, as far as logistics go, i could easily provide a helicopter to get us in as far as possible. less of a hike.'

it's impossible that beatrice didn't see your cane. 'i have adaptive equipment for myself. i can do the hike.'

but her brows knit together. 'yes, i assumed so: you're leading the expedition. i just meant, for my team at least, the fewer miles we have to bring photography and climbing gear in a jungle, the better. it's heavy, and then we have to do a major climb.'

'oh.' you bite your bottom lip. 'that makes sense. sorry, people suck sometimes.'

'i imagine so.' she looks at you very sincerely. 'i'm sorry.'

you wave her off. 'thanks. it is what it is, though.'

beatrice doesn't try to argue, although you can tell that maybe she wants to. 'anyway, whatever you think will help your team, and whatever will help mine, that falls outside of your grant funds, i can cover.'

'that's — are you sure?'

she nods. 'quite.'

'where did you get these discretionary funds?' you can't help asking.

'a bad man,' she says, leaning forward and whispering dramatically. it makes you laugh.

'ooh, did you kill him? warlord?'

'alas, no. my father, and he's already dead.'

'ah.' you snap your fingers. 'well, if another opportunity comes up, you just let me know. i have tons of lethal neurotoxins in my lab. i'm always down to... you know — murder —' you whisper — 'a billionaire. long haul ethics, you know?'

she nods very solemnly, fighting a smile. 'i'll keep that under advisement.'

you fight the urge to ask her for a drink, and you definitely stare at her mouth a little too long, but then you get it together and offer your hand. 'well, partners?'

she shakes it, hers strong and rough with callouses. the thought sends a little shiver up your spine, but you valiantly ignore it. 'partners.'

/

beatrice invites you, after a few days of emailing back and forth to create an updated budget and logistics plan, to meet at a climbing gym. it's to meet her other two team members first. before you all get together with your main crew for dinner afterward. she'd given you their names, headshots, and very formal bios, which you had kind of loved: lilith, who, according to beatrice's bio, will be the lead climber. when you google her, you find out that she's, like, a world champion big wall climber, so that bodes well. and then mary, another photographer and world class marksman — I know this isn't particularly relevant, beatrice had included as a footnote, but it is quite impressive — and avid climber too.

you're hopeful about it all, and you're hopeful that tonight maybe she just wants to see you alone, and to have you watch her climb. there's, like, a two percent chance you'll physically be able to climb, really, but that's fine. she'd texted you about it, far less formal than her perfectly punctuated emails, so that's a good sign. and she'd posted a recent picture someone took of her — a candid, petting the trunk of an elephant peacefully — on her instagram too. maybe that was scheduled — beatrice seems like the kind of person who would schedule instagram posts — but a girl can hope, you know? you liked it one hour and fourteen minutes after she posted, from the lab's social media account and not your personal one, so you figure you've handled this all perfectly. you're great, beatrice is a colleague, and you've got this.

you're stressed about what to wear to a climbing gym and then to get dinner afterward, although there's probably a locker room or something, but it's fine. you're hot in anything. (or nothing. not that the night is going to go there.) you settle on tight leggings you wear to the gym and a sports bra, a cropped jacket on over. it's, like, cute and femme, but also practical. you brush on some mascara and put part of your hair into a little bun so it won't fall into your eyes, and you pack a spare change of clothes in a canvas tote — slacks and a nice bra and a t-shirt that hugs your body perfectly along with a pair of platform converse and an army-green overshirt — in case everyone else changes before going to dinner.

you grab your cane and head out the door.

/

if you fall to your death, it's definitely not going to be because of your back or legs. it's going to be because beatrice is in loose pants that seem comfortable for climbing and a tight racerback tank, and when you walk in, she's hanging by one arm on a short wall, just chilling out there, before she seems to decide what she wants to do. she brings her legs up to find footholds and then she's almost upside down, holding onto the wall with both hands calmly and moving so fluidly — a leg stretching out, her chalked fingers grasping onto a tiny hold. there's a delicate tattoo along her right forearm, all linework, and there are scars all over her left shoulder, running down to her elbow from what you can see: some are jagged and some are clean, neat, like surgical incisions. they don't seem to be limiting her progress at all, because she moves over the outhanging ledge easily and then to the top before just letting go and calmly rolling to her feet after she lands without a sound.

the — very hot — woman, lilith, you know from the headshot, sitting on the floor next to the wall, legs outstretched, leaning back on her palms set flat on the ground behind, and looking impossibly graceful while doing it, groans.

'getting stuck that long on a soft V8? come on, beatrice.'

beatrice, to her credit, just shrugs.

'shoulder?' the other woman asks.

'it's fine,' beatrice says. 'just getting back into the groove of your tiny walls.'

'oh, ha ha.'

'8091 meters will really change your perspective. you should try it sometime.'

'no thanks, i'll stick to my world records, thank you very much.'

they seem like they might physically fight, but then they both start laughing. weird, but you fuck with it.

beatrice turns, her hands on her hips, and, like, whew, god fucking bless, and then waves with a smile when she sees you. she walks over. 'hello ava.'

'hey,' you say, suddenly feeling a little awkward: you have not a single idea what you're doing. 'that was pretty impressive.'

'it was not,' the lilith says.

beatrice heads toward her anyway, and you follow. 'you can ignore her most of the time,' she says. 'dr. silva, this is lilith. lilith, dr. silva.'

'just ava.' you look at beatrice with a raised brow. 'please.'

lilith lazily salutes. 'ava, then. our illustrious leader, i hear. beatrice is making me lead a 1000 foot first ascent for a frog?'

'i'm not making you do anything,' beatrice says, and lilith grumbles like a teenager. it's funny, and you decide that you like her then and there, even if she scares you a little. she scares you a little more when she gracefully gets to her feet. she's tall and imposing, with a sharp face and long hair braided back, more wiry than beatrice's bigger muscles, but — you're sure — just as strong.

she offers her hand, which you shake. 'in my defense,' you say, 'it is a very cool frog. we can even name it after you, if you want.'

this seems to amuse her, because there's a hint of a smile on her face.  'i do like first ascents anyway.'

'see,' you say, 'that's the spirit.'

'ava,' beatrice says, 'no pressure, but i thought you might find it fun to try climbing. only if you'd like.'

'i'm, uh —' you gesture a little clumsily with your cane, the tips of your ears turning red. 'not sure that i can?'

'mary is an adaptive climbing instructor,' beatrice says, gesturing over to the taller wall with ropes connected through pulleys at the top, where a strong Black woman with perfectly neat braids and a dark outfit on is sorting through a few harnesses on the ground. 'but if you'd rather not climb, lilith and i are just finishing up. we can show you a few things we've been practicing in anticipation for the route, and then change and go to dinner.'

beatrice doesn't say either choice with any more or less merit, or worth, or importance: they're choices, and they're yours, and they won't affect how much she trusts you or believes in the expedition. lilith is checking her phone, uninterested at this point, and you decide, as you always have, to try.

'yeah, sure. i have no idea what adaptive climbing is, though.'

beatrice smiles and lilith stays on her phone, texting. 'that's fine. i have no idea about ninety percent of what you study.'

'i find that hard to believe. you're a wildlife photographer.'

she hums, softly touching your elbow and then walking toward mary. 'conservationist photography, sure. but i'm not a biologist.'

you make a note that beatrice doesn't really like wildlife photographer as a job title, although she was polite enough to not outright tell you so. 'well, i'm not a climber, so, quid pro quo?'

'ah, but you will be after tonight,' mary says, standing with a smile and offering her hand. 'dr. silva, right?'

'just ava,' you tell her, endeared by the fact that beatrice had probably been very formally saying dr. silva to her team this entire time. you shake mary's hand as firmly as you can and feel immediately a little more relaxed with the confident, easy way she holds her shoulders, her kind smile, her bright eyes.

'beatrice and i go way back,' she says. 'this project of yours sounds amazing. i was excited when she asked if i wanted in.'

'of course i'd ask,' beatrice says, bumping mary in the shoulder, who rolls her eyes fondly.

'well, beatrice said you were promised an adaptive climbing lesson.'

'if you're still in,' beatrice says, 'mary can show you the ropes.' she laughs at herself. 'literally.'

mary groans, but you're delighted. 'well, don't leave me hanging.'

'no. not another bad pun aficionado. please.'

beatrice grins and you sling an arm over her slightly sweaty and delightfully strong shoulders. she stiffens a little, and mary looks to her for a moment, and you're worried you've overstepped, and fast. but then beatrice relaxes.

you step back and gesture between the two of you happily. 'is this our thing now?'

'if trading terrible puns is wrong, then i don't want to be right.'

mary groans. 'not sure why i agreed to this trip after all.'

'we can name a frog after you, if you want,' you offer.

mary perks up. 'really?'

'yeah,' you say, 'sure. i've already named one after myself and given five others the dumbest, gayest names i could think of.'

'i'm back in, then.'

you laugh. 'well, let's rock and try not to roll.'

mary sighs, but beatrice's muffled laugh into your shoulder is way worth it.

/

Hi Ava, I'll be in town today to get some equipment squared away. I was wondering if maybe you'd like to have dinner if you're free. No shop talk, unless you want

you read and reread the text. you'd gone over shitty — expected, but still shitty — test results from an mri at your neurologist's earlier today, and, even though your team seemed to gel the other night, and all of your logistics are much less daunting now that beatrice has covered some of them financially, you had planned to stay home in your favorite boxers and most comfortable hoodie and wallow with a mediocre bottle of wine and good pizza and great reality tv.

but — hey, that sounds sweet. any places in mind?

beatrice texts back almost immediately. I don't know the area too well. You can pick, if you'd like

like, you're colleagues. you're about to be in one of the most remote parts of the world together in five days, with just a handful of other people, for weeks, maybe longer. you're the leader of the expedition but beatrice is, in important ways, a leader too. she's smart and beautiful and handsome and focused. if it's a date, incredible; if it's not, you still want to know her, you still want to spend time in her gentle warmth.

any food allergies/hatred?

she responds, No, I'm pretty adventurous

still, no clarity, but you set a place and time — one of your favorite tapas restaurants with a great little bar and, if it gets late enough, a good dance floor — and then set about getting ready. you eat a banana and take ibuprofen, which hopefully will help you be able to dance without much pain, and then get as pretty as you deem not desperate for a normal dinner with a colleague to be. which, it's you, so you're still very, very pretty, including one of your very best cleavage tanks. you finish your eyeliner perfectly and blow yourself a little kiss in the mirror. for good luck, or whatever. it's science.

/

'i got tired of it,' beatrice says. 'war photography is...' she pauses, and shakes her head, like she doesn't quite know what to tell you. you're totally sure she's not telling the truth, not really, but you know not to push, to spook her away. 'i could leave,' she settles on. 'as much as i hate the west, as much as i hate american and european, especially british, foreign policy, and its destruction of the world — i got to take pictures, and leave. at first, i thought it was something important i could do, to record the truth. political inherently, anti-imperialist, without being in politics. but, i was in occupied palestine, and, then, after —' she clears her throat, brings her fingers up to ghost over the scar through her brow — 'after. i couldn't do it. they're wars because of my history — our collective history — but they weren't my wars. they aren’t my wars. i can’t photograph them, at least right now. because i got to leave.'

you're horrified that she might start to cry — which isn't horrifying, not at all, you cry all the time, but you're supposed to be having a nice meal with your colleague and you had asked what you thought was an innocuous question about how she got into her more recent conservationist work, but clearly, not innocuous. you're starting to think, with a kind of clarity you very rarely have about anyone, that nothing about beatrice herself is innocuous. even her collarless button down and loose pants cuffed at the ankles — and the way all of her clothes, ever practical, drape with a tailored casualness on her small, strong frame — her easy hair that’s always actually perfectly trimmed and styled, the pattern of callouses on her hands: everything about her is intentioned. she means what she says. she means what she does. she means who she is.

'i started studying frogs with my mom,' you offer. it's true, and you mean who you are too.

she takes a sip of her water and nods in what you can tell is a quiet relief.

'my family is from manaus. my mom wasn't a scientist or anything, she was a bank teller, but when i was little, we'd go out often. she loved the rainforest, so, you know, i loved the rainforest.'

beatrice smiles gently. 'that sounds beautiful.'

you stare down at a croqueta and tear a small piece of it off, let the old ache fill your chest. 'she died, when i was seven.'

'oh,' beatrice says, 'i —'

'— it was a long time ago,' you say.

'sometimes that doesn't make it hurt any less.'

it's permission, to feel how you need to. most people accept when you tell them that and move on in relief, unwilling or unable to give you the space. but beatrice sits steadily. 'i broke my back, during the car accident we were in; we were visiting spain and, well. i had to relearn to walk. it took a really long time, and the orphanage i grew up in wasn't big on good physical therapy or really any care, so i taught myself what i could outside of school, got into university, got good medical care for the first time, like, ever. and i started studying biology. i went back to the rainforest as soon as i could, as a research assistant, and guyana was ... it's mind-blowing, bea.'

she weighs it all in contemplative silence for a moment, trying to decide what you need; what relief she can give. ‘i can't wait to see. i've always wanted to go.'

it is relief, what you feel, to be so immediately seen and understood. 'well, it's not just anyone i'd want to bring to the rainforest. my mom's favorites were always frogs, so —' you shrug, suddenly a little at a loss.

'so here we are, about to go find another.'

you pop the croqueta into your mouth, feel the dull pain in your chest dissipate when you realize you're close enough to beatrice's face to see her freckles. 'i have spinal stenosis, from the accident. it's progressing pretty fast, even with the best medical team, tech, surgeries, all that.'

she nods, like she understands what you mean without making you have to say it. it's a gift, bigger than she probably knows.

'i really want to find that fucking frog.'

'well,' she says, and lifts her glass, 'to finding our frog.'

'you know, it's bad luck to toast with water.'

she frowns. 'i don't usually drink.'

'you're very... controlled.'

she waits a beat and then grins. 'okay, one beer.'

'fuck yeah!'

'one, ava.'

'mhm. whatever you say, bea.'

/

'i have to take the train back,' beatrice argues — or, at least, tries to argue, because her eyes drift down to your boobs when you take your sweater off. success.

'you can just stay at my place. i have a mediocre ikea couch.'

'i can't let you sleep on your own couch.'

you laugh. 'oh, you definitely get the couch. i need all the good mattress support i can get before i sleep in a tent for a month.'

she smiles, gently and a little sad, but then the moment passes, a kind of grace. 'fine.'

'really?'

the set of her shoulders is looser but still sure, still so, so certain. 'yes.'

'hell yeah!' she laughs. 'shots?'

beatrice pulls a face but you order lemon drops anyway, mostly because vodka seems neutral and they're a good shot for people who don't drink often, sweet and tangy and fun. beatrice sniffs hers first — bold move, big mistake most of the time — but then nods in approval.

'to our frog,' you say, and she clinks her glass with yours. you touch it to the bartop and she follows suit, and then take it as smoothly as you can. it's an easy drink, so you don't have any problems, and she swallows without too much of a grimace. 'okay?'

'it's not bad,' she says, and your whole body hums, probably because of the two margaritas you had with dinner and this shot now, but also because there are freckles stretching across her cheeks and gold flecks in her brown eyes and if you let yourself look closely a tiny split on her lip, probably from the dry, cool air recently.

you shake yourself out of... whatever that was, and you order two more shots; she takes hers without hesitation this time, laughing when you spill a little down your cheek. she reaches a hand and wipes with her strong hand, tender, over the corner of your mouth, down to your jaw, and then clears her throat, takes her hand back quickly, although you want to ask for her to stay. but instead, 'come on, bea,' you say, 'let's dance!'

she only groans in a show of protest for posterity, you're sure, because she's very strong and you're very small and when you tug on her wrists she follows you easily.

you love to dance; you have always loved to dance: what little you remember of your mom is full of green, the rainforest and the wall of your living room. she would push back all the furniture to the edges, just the two of you in a small apartment, where you slept in the same bed and ate fruit from the trees outside. she would put on britney spears and jump around with you; she would put on stevie nicks and hold you in her arms, swaying around. she was full of light, from what you remember, always ready to read to you, in portugese and in english; to help you with your math and your handwriting. she cut your food for you and bought you new shoes when yours wore through the soles. she had been a good mom in the way good moms are: happy to hold your hand, to rub her nose against yours, to let you eat the batter off the spoon. you don't remember much, not before the accident, but it had been easy, and beautiful — the mist and orchids and green, all around.

beatrice is a little stiff until you start jumping around, fully out of time with the music, just to make her laugh. and she does, a smile lighting up her whole face. her body is graceful like this too, like it's always somehow known exactly how to move. you wonder, fleetingly between songs, what she was like as a child, if she was as sure and smart and kind as she is now. someone crowds into her space from behind and then you're not thinking of anything other than the tickle of her hair against your cheek as she presses into you, the lilt of her laugh into your ear, the hard muscles of her shoulders and the soft, small swell of her hips when you bring your palms to rest there. you're drunk and she's beautiful, and you've kissed lots of beautiful people when you've been drunk. but she closes her eyes and sways to the beat and it's like the rest of the world falls away. it's like there's only you and beatrice and the cloud forest, above anything else that has harmed and will harm again. there's her gold skin and scars and tattoos hidden under her shirt, the healed slices down your spine, the air between your bodies: sweaty, sticky with spilled drinks, thumping bass, everyone else in this bar. there's only the two of you, and it's a little like you've been punched in the gut: you're falling in love with her. it's easy, right now, to put a name to it all, when you can look at her jaw without reproach.

she opens her eyes and looks at you, a smile on her face, and leans in your direction. it's easy, to bring your hand to touch where you had been staring, to say, 'bea,' as she laughs into your neck, says, 'this is so fun, thank you.' it's hard to not kiss her, but she's ... extraordinary, and you don't want your first kiss to be in the middle of a mid-at-best dance floor after a few shots. you want it to be somewhere beautiful. somewhere you already know; somewhere you're certain she'll love.

'let's go home,' you say, because you had done another round somewhere between songs and she's slightly unsteady on her feet. she nods into your neck and you take her hand.

/

you walk back to your apartment with her, one arm looped through hers — 'very gallant,' you'd said when she'd offered, and even in the dim light from the moon and streetlamps you had seen her blush — and your other hand using your cane. she had found it for you, tucked behind where you had been sitting at the bar; she hadn't asked anything about why you didn't use it when you were dancing, or why you need it now. you know so many good people and you organize a lot with some of your other friends who work with the disability center at the university, but there is some kind of a revelation about being seen so wholly.

but maybe you're also just a little drunk, because she sways a bit as you walk and her accent is lilting, tender, her hair messy in her eyes. it's probably as soft as it looks; you had lost your hair tie somewhere between shots two and three and you tuck yours behind your ear. you have so many questions you want to ask her but you hold them in because she looks up at the moon and the stars and it's enough, to be here with her. to know her laugh, now, and the way she has hurt too.

it's enough to just walk.

/

it hadn't actually taken too much convincing — after you unlocked the door and gave her some choices in pajamas, soft sleep shorts and a big cotton crew her eventual choices, and gotten her a glass of water and a few cheddar crackers — to get her to agree to sleep in your bed with you. perhaps it had been because your couch is ... an unknown number of years old — 'listen, bea, phd students make, like, no money, and it was twenty bucks on craigslist three years go' — or maybe, maybe, it's because she just wants to.

you settle in first, listen to her brush her teeth with a spare toothbrush you'd given her, and wash her face with your facewash — that she had frowned at, accidentally rude but pretty funny and, like, fair, you got it from the drug store on the corner and you're sure she has a whole understated fancy little routine when she's not out in the field — and then wash her hands after going to the bathroom. you love sex, so you sleep with people often. you've had a boyfriend before, that you cared about deeply, so there's some parts of intimacy that are familiar to you, of course. but this, beatrice carefully climbing into bed next to you, with her freckles and her eyelashes and the pink of her lips, is different: you're not going to kiss her, not right now. you're not going to reach out and put your palm on her jaw like you want to, or feel the warm skin of her ribs, the goosebumps that would inevitably rise there if you raked your nails across the ridges. you're not going to because, you know, somewhere elemental in you, that you want to know her, and love her, for a long time. you want to take her to the rainforest.

'where's your favorite place in the world?' you ask instead, whisper it into the dark, the soft outline of her face.

she's turned toward you, her hands tucked carefully under her chin; it makes her look younger. 'tibet. the himalayas.'

'makes sense. you and your big mountains.'

'what's the last mountain you... summited?'

'annapurna. it's the tenth tallest in the world.' she pauses, considering. 'are we playing twenty questions?'

her eyelids are drooping. 'i don't think you're going to be awake for twenty questions.'

she laughs softly. 'i want to ask you one, though.'

'hmm. sure. two to four questions, then.'

'do you... uh, well, okay. do you like women?'

it's so awkward, so out of place for someone so sure, that you have to fight the urge to burst out in laughter. but it's also soft, and nervous, her eyes wide. it makes you feel sixteen again, full of possibility. 'yeah, bea. i'm bi. i love women.'

she nods, tucks her hands even tighter under her chin, lets a big relieved breath out. 'cool.'

'yeah?'

'mhm. i'm a lesbian, if you didn't know.'

you want to say you're the gayest looking person i've ever met but you refrain. for the romance of it all. 'good to know.'

she tries hard to wink and fails miserably. you let yourself, just once, just for a moment, reach out and run your hand through her hair. she leans into your touch, relaxes under it, before you fold yourself back onto your side of the bed. 'you have one more question.'

'so do you.'

'okay. hmm. favorite ice cream flavor?'

she laughs. 'that's what you want to know.'

you nod. 'it's very important information.'

'okay.' she thinks hard about it, genuinely. 'mint chocolate chip?'

'that's so boring, jeez.'

'oh, i'm sorry. simple combinations of dynamic tastes is probably too sophisticated for you to understand.'

'okay, ratatouille.'

she tries, a valiant effort, to not crack a smile, but she eventually does. 'okay, my turn. favorite color?'

you let your eyes fall closed and imagine it all, the sharp thorns and the torrential rain and the chirp of the neon blue frog you'd found last time. you think about taking her there. 'green, of course,' you tell her, a promise, a future in the clouds. 'green.'

#conservationist au #conservationist au 🐸 #ft butch bea but we gotta have different tags lol but she's here #just ch1 but ch2 is the expedition! #avatrice #avatrice fic #wn #wn fic #frog au #i guess bc y’all love that lol

[meowmeowriley]

Hi! First ask ever and English is not my native language so sorry if i mess up something or sound strange.

Please, i need to know more about 4, 5, 9, 12 and 13 of your wip list. Anything you want to tell because i am frothing at the mouth at all of them but 4, 5, 9, 12 and 13 in particular.

Thank you thank you thank you! I'll give you a little bit of each of those fics! ❤

4) Oh, Brother. Funny thing about this fic, it was supposed to be a one-shot 😅 too many people liked it though, so I had to keep going. I actually just uploaded a new chapter today! A little summary - Soap and Ghost's families think they need help getting together, so they organize an aquarium date! (Plot twist, they did not need the help, but they loved the excuse to be around one another) It was my first attempt at keeping the boys in character, I think I've done okay.

5) I Don't Think We're in Space Anymore. Oh look at that, another one that was supposed to be a one-shot. Honestly this fic is the one I've put the most effort into. There's a ton of art linked to the fic, drawn by myself and my friend. Ive even been working on a hand written Journal for Soap for this AU. Pictures of those pages are in the fic, and here on Tumblr. Ghost is a shape-shifting alien, and Price decides to keep him. He's violent and destructive, and he's viciously protective of his team. Gaz and Ghost bond over star gazing, Ghost and Soap are both insanely horny for one another, and Laswell pretends she's not as attached to Ghost and his alien quirks as she actually is. (She loves him dearly.)

9) Is That Gonna be a Problem? This is the fic that was supposed to be my first attempt to write a realistic and in character version of the boys, but then Oh, Brother happened. In it, Ghost had met Johnny and his twin sister Jenny when they were kids, and decided to reconnect as an adult. It's going to follow Simon and the MacTavish twins as they get to know each other, and eventually how Simon and Johnny got together. And then of course, the 141 learning that they were together the whole time.

12) Outlaw Outta Time. I absolutely love Red Dead Redemption 2. One day I had the thought that Dutch Van der Lind would absolutely love Phillip Graves, and the idea grew from there. Its gonna have Ghost, Soap, Alejandro, and Rodolfo getting mixed up with the Van der Lind gang, looking for Graves, and trying to go home. All the while Arthur watches (established relationship) Ghost and Soap, and is jealous because he's been pining after a certain clumsy photographer (Albert Mason) but won't allow himself to have him. This story is another that I want to make a Journal for Soap, and also one for Arthur, so it's going to be a hell of a lot of work, and I'm excited for it! 😁

13) This one, I have the least for you. It doesn't have a name, all I have is the idea. I myself use they/it pronouns, and I honestly think Ghost would too. For this fic, Ghost would've been born female, had top surgery, and takes testosterone. Ghost is aware they present male, and therefore never corrects anyone for using male pronouns. Soap is straight. He's sure of it. Except Ghost gets him all hot and bothered. He's not sure how to feel about that. This fic is absolutely gonna end with Ghost riding Soap.

Thank you again for the ask! I hope this was sufficient, but if it wasn't, let me know!

#cod mw2 #ghostsoap #soapghost #ghoap #fanfic #ao3 #text post #call of duty #trans!Ghost #agender!Ghost #rdr2 #arthur morgan #arthur morgan/albert mason

[suchawrathfullamb]

Hello again I was the one who asked u the s3 question and now I have finished watching the finale and tbh I have so many emotions going on right now but the main thing I want to know is - was Will aware that shit will go that way or did he plan Hannibal escape or he was just going with the flow?? What was the endgame he wanted to have ? I am confused because his plan doesn't seem like a solid plan. He also warned Bedelia before all that . So like what was happening in the finale 😅😅😅

I think we can't try to rationalize actions that were bordering on insane. Bedelia clocked that when she said "what you are becoming is pathological". She is arguably the most intelligent and perceptive character in the show, so we know she's absolutely right about this. "You found religion", she says. Will is not close to normal or sane in this last part of the series, and this show has that element of "long term foreshadowing", so things that happened in season one, only made sense in season two and so on, and unfortunately they were almost certain they'd be getting a 4th season, so I'm pretty sure most questions would be answered there :/.

But, I think it's safe to say they were prepping us for a completely insane Will Graham, since Fuller said in season four it would be "Will Graham's broken mind".

I believe his actions were already mirroring this brokenness, so it's hard to try and make sense of them, he was acting carelessly.

But we do have interesting insights from the script that could help us answer your question:

Here we see that Will is shattered and incomplete. This is when Francis gets him in the hotel room.

Here we understand that Will is mirroring a scene where Francis burned down his shrine. Both he and Hannibal are lighting up votive candles. This isn't random, no writer would waste time putting such specific detail and then making sure this was on the scene, for no reason or aesthetic reasons (aesthetics would not be on the script unless it had symbolic meaning, notice how they never write the coloring of the show, the way they light up Mads' face to look like a skull, etc, those are aesthetic choices and do not need to be specified on script in such detailed manner).

VOTIVE in all caps is very meaningful, too. For those who don't know, this is what votive candles mean:

Both of them are lighting votives. At the altar.

Then, we have this line that Will says to Reba, about Francis:

This is basically foreshadowing of the cliff scene/dragon fight. This is exactly what both Will and Hannibal feel about one another.

And just before he executes the plan, we have this great exchange with Bedelia:

He had no clue what he truly wanted. All he wanted was to free Hannibal. The rest was just happening. To him, Hannibal could've simply escaped after Francis shot the police. He asked Will to come. Will had no idea of the existence of the cliff house or anything like that, so he couldn't have predicted exactly what happened.

It's the exact same picture of an addict. If you spend a long time in abstinence, then you use, it hits harder than before and the recovery becomes even more difficult. He spent three years without Hannibal, "was it good to see me?", "Good? No." It was not good, it fucked him up. He was losing his mind and we see that in scenes where he's beginning to hallucinate again and is gradually being more affected by the Dragon's "energy"/idea.

He also threatened Bedelia, "I'd pack my bags if I were you". He had the intention of releasing Hannibal and all hell breaks loose after that. He had no specific plan other than setting H free and watching everything burn down.

#ask the lamb #hannibal meta #hannibal analysis #hannigram #nbc hannibal #hannibal #will graham #murder husbands #hannibal lecter #hugh dancy #mads mikkelsen

[drifloonz]

I also wanna see hcs of Steven with an autistic reader (dating hcs ig, I'm also a Strangled Red simp and I'm autistic)

remember me. im alive . Im here to heal the drought . i am too tired mentally to do the whole format shebang maybe ill dress it up when i wake up ( it is currently 6:21 am for me and im not tired yet )

Actually i dont think i do anything that extra or fancy with my formatting other than the title which i added right now. so . Enjoy

steven x autistic reader!

♡ he's autistic as well ... like that "I hate people" type'a autism. at least nowadays! i think he used to have trouble with volume and tone before the incident and just generally get easily overwhelmed... and either freeze or start to go on a walk to take his mind off of things. stuff like that.

♡ He's also insanely autistic about battle strategies and its his special interest of sorts . like... not that much, he did ( in my interpretation and what is kind of implied? ) sweep everything with miki because she's a special charizard who just kind of. Is stronger in all ways.

♡ BUT! i think i mean this in the more pokeani style of battles - he's crafty and very observant of his surroundings and how to "Cheat" battles with it. wink

♡ anyways yeah autistic reader . hi . You came for dating hcs right .

♡ he tends to just live in his house, lurking, stalking, barely moving out of bed to eat - so you might have to help him with that. ... buuuut, if you're similar, then you two will simply just sit in bed staring at the ceiling all day . napstablook core

♡ he hasn't had much stimulation outside of taking care of his basic needs and like. i'unno. being alive in general. so if you have an interest he isn't too aware of, he's always very happy to listen.

♡ he's an extremely good listener- he'll be nodding and mostly silent, but he may ask questions once he's more comfortable with you. he is actively trying to engage with your interests, although his own autism makes his tone a little stagnant- if he sounds uninterested, it's not intentional. his voice just comes off like that.

♡ he particularly likes games and music although the interests and energy for them have wavered a lot for him personally - so if your interests align with those sorts of things, he'll definitely be on board. you being into something in a genre he used to like definitely gives him enough energy to try again.

♡ this eventually does end up with him having more energy to engage with things that used to give him joy in a similar way . mostly playing games... like, a pokemon stadium or battle revolution game if those existed in-universe? because he can't exactly uh. Battle for real anymore without hurting those around him. of course, he always has charizard on his teams front and center. it's not Her. but, it'll suffice as long as he distracts himself.

♡ truly, it's just like this. introduce things to him and he'll be eager to try or listen or talk to you about them.

♡ if you get overwhelmed anywhere, he is quick to move you out of the area and also maybe take away the overwhelming Element. if it's a person, well. he'll just basically glare at them. a silent 'Fuck Off'

♡ also he will personally appreciate it if you get him more clothes. having just a few sets is fine for his depression, but the more he realizes it, the fabric feels awful sometimes. mainly, his trainer outfit he usually goes outside with - it's very worn and torn and the material was always a little cheap... if you get him a replacement, he'll be all the happier for it.

♡ he'd also give the old one to you if you cared about that sort of thing, but he'd be tentative because. well. it's worn and torn...?

♡ unless you fix it up and sew it somehow. that'd be nice. Im getting offtrack

♡ if you draw, write, or do creative things - he's always happy to see them. he likes to simply wrap his arms around your waist, resting his head on your shoulder as he looks at what you're doing now and again... it's, calming? like, really calming. to be honest, he could do that forever and ever.

♡ until you two get hungry of course. but, until then.

♡ he does also of course engage and ask about things like your OCs ( if you have them ), worlds, writing, dynamics, headcanons - anything, everything.

♡ generally things like this are what he's happiest with . watching something with you or watching you do something as he lays back and relaxes. seeing you enjoy the things you like makes him feel a lot better even though its something so simple .

♡ ... S!3v3n is also similar, he's just much more quiet- basically nonverbal - about how he goes about it. those red eyes will always be watching intently though .

_____

sorry if these were barebones i didnt rlly know what to Go off of but yeah . he is autistic too !!!! the Tismry

#wispy writes #steven strangled red #steven strangled red x reader #strangled red x reader

[faulty-writes]

Hii! Idk if you write for male readers, but if you do could you possible write head-cannons for Iida x a trans masc reader? If not thats ok!!

Also your writing is so top tier its insane

[ Hello Anon, my blog is LGBT+ friendly and as long as the LGBT+ themed requests aren't too over the top or gruesome, I'll happily write whatever. In general, I try to keep my pieces gender neutral but requests are different. If the requester specifically wants a female or male or anything in between reader insert, I'll do as they wish. It doesn't matter to me, honestly. Also thank you, I enjoy writing very much and I'm always happy when others enjoy my writing. I hope I did your request justice! ]

Tenya naturally made every effort to understand your transgender masculine experiences, in addition to providing unwavering support. He realized it was quite difficult trying to match up to or chase after the identity you desired, but he was known for his speed and would pridefully assist you in reaching your goals.

"Hm, I see. And what challenges do individuals in your predicament typically experience?" He took a direct and educational approach to learning more about you as he realized he was quite innocently ignorant of the troubles the transgender and gender-affirming community faced. While talking to Tenya was more like talking to a therapist, you told him all you were comfortable telling him.

He would assist you in finding the appropriate resources such as proper support groups, organizations, and counseling services. He found that despite being skilled as a lifestyle guidance counselor, Hound Dog was not the most appropriate one to go to for your unique situation.

"Do you require any assistance with these papers?" While it was a headache, he realized that you may prefer pronouns outside the "male-female" binary. As such, he wanted to ensure that whatever pronouns you chose were properly reflected in your school documentation and other forms of ID.

Tenya would assist you in finding helpful resources, such as support groups, counseling services, or organizations that assist transgender and or gender-affirming individuals. In addition, he would assist in accessing relevant information regarding support networks for you.

"Hm, I see. I will gladly assist you in this dilemma," he would approach sensitive conversations, such as which bathroom you preferred to use, with a great sense of empathy and understanding to ensure your emotional well-being.

He acted as a constant reminder that you needed to be confident and proud of who you are. While you knew he was trying to help, at times you felt suffocated by him. However, you understood that the importance of self-acceptance and self-respect was not to be underestimated.

"I see, today has been particularly hard for you. I apologize. However, I am quite content if you wish to stay here. I will do my best to provide you with the appropriate comfort," he understands the emotional challenges that you might face and always tries to be a dependable source of emotional support for you.

"I do hope this is not overwhelming, but I assure you that I and the rest of the students in Class A as well as a few select students from Class B will always provide you with the social circle you desire as well as a supportive environment," he stated, after all having a steady supportive environment was essential for growth.

He recognized the importance of transgender and gender-affirming rights and with your permission, helped raise awareness about and promote LGBT+ awareness within the community of Yuuei High. This usually included making posters, speaking about LGBT issues at provided class meetings, and so on.

#tenya x reader #iida x reader #iida x y/n #tenya x y/n #tenya x you #iida x you #bnha x reader #bnha x you #bnha x y/n #tenya iida x reader #faulty writes: tenya iida: 23 #faulty writes: tenya iida: headcanons: 23

[lazulian-devil]

The Villains of Skulduggery Pleasant 2

Now before I start, I want to point out that Book 2 has an absolute myriad of Bad Guys™.

The book introduces not only Dusk (who is great at making everyones day just a whole lot worse. Just fun to be around. Only bit Valkyrie, killed the Lord Vampire of Dublin™ Moloch and is generally just... So much fun!), but also the whole Diablerie Subplot (oh look, China is getting a backstory upgrade), Billy-Ray motherfucking Sanguine (who is in one way or another responsible for a third of my favourite quotes from the books), the Torment and Roarhaven (and all that bullshit), the reflection quite literally cracking (this could never possibly become important later on), the whole Faceless One dimension and whatever was going on with Thurid Guild.

So uh, yeah. Book 2, for being actually quite short in comparison to the absolute Grimoires Derek would later be known to write, is a dense friggin book. You might ask yourself "Wow, this sure is a whole lot more dense than the first one" and thats because Landy had at this point already won and be nominated for enough awards that his writing adventures would be a solid thing for him.

The first book was a leap of faith, the second was the beginning of a saga.

(Tangent: I personally think Landy plans and writes books in pairs of threes, as even Phase 2 was originally supposed to be nine but then turned into six books by force of publisher. Because I read them on a Kindle, I am very much aware of how much longer they have gotten with each installment and I think that he, like many an author, would absolutely benefit from cutting down some of the sizes of his books. But book 2 is still very much on the shorter end, if not the second shortest book of the series).

So, after all these absolute bangers of villains, who will I focus on? The one that dies (which is honestly how I think I should do these. Just slowly talk about everyone who actually dies and leave the "I will appear in a trillion books" villains for last, in favor of my sanity).

Baron Vengous.

In a world filled with sarcastic, silly villains, Vengous is the stern military guy that doesnt talk a lot.

And I mean that literally. Besides like... One or two speeches the guy just doesnt talk much.

Ive managed to complete Book 7 in my reading insanity and have read up to 13 before that (reading them as they come out) and I can say with a solid 78% conviction that he is the most "normal" villain and antagonist the series has ever had.

Hes straightforward. Hes methodical. His status as a General of Mevolent is based not only in honestly insane levels of power, but in his pure military might brain and body.

Baron Vengous is the absolute most opposite anyone could have written to Serpine. He almost seems specifically written to oppose him in as many ways as possible. If Serpine was the Vibe, Vengous is the Antivibe.

You get my point.

We actually get an in depth look into him later (where? Leibniz. In terms of trouble, always assume Leibniz) and even among those people, he is somewhat normal. Apart from his wife.

Oh and the other character trait he has. What was that again? I can barely remember.

Ah. Right. Faceless One fanaticism to the point of self destruction.

It makes you wonder what he did after the Amnesty, as he is broken out of prison by Sanguine at the beginning of the book and its never quite explained why. Serpine was just vibin' in his castle. Maybe he did some human sacrifices to his beloved gods and got caught for it. Who knows. (Afaik, its never explained what he did after the Amnesty to end up in prison in the first place and at this point, Im convinced it doesnt really matter and was just a neat way to introduce Sanguine).

But Vengous just isnt a very... Interesting character. He only works so well because Sanguine is a delight anywhere he shows up and Dusk is just utterly terrifying. The Baron is almost too normal among them.

You need proof? Fine. Let me grab my Kindle real quick.

Insert transition music.

Alright, so. Vengous first appearance (Chapter 3: Vengous) paints him as the man in control, the guy who has been in prison for eighty years (Im sure cellphones blew his mind) is out and looking for revenge. He doesnt say a lot. His first actual words are "You're late." to Dusk (who he later points out in his internal dialogue isnt even a man to him). This gives us two insights into his character: First, his stoic mentality. He just murdered someone. Hes entirely calm. Lifes are a casualty to him. And second, he holds enough power or reputation that a very skilled vampire is not only working for him, but accepts being talked down to by this man.

Later in Chapter Ten: The Armour, Sanguines inner dialogue says "The Baron was not a man to be trifled with, especially at a time like this". Once again, we have a whole chapter that shows of several things (passively) about the Baron. He is a planner (shown by his knowledge of the armor and its requirements, the supposed knowledge of where Vile died and his general tactical demeanour being described), he is someone who seems to be in control at all times (shown by him casually watching a bunch of infected under Dusks command dig away) and he is incredibly patient (shown in previous chapters by him being able to wait 80 years and then just "get on with it. Sure, hes mad at Sanguine, but his plans are more important).

And then we add something a little spicy in the mixture: Hes not only a fanatic, hes also an asshole. Ooooohoho.

Its Chapter 18 in which our Protagonists finally meet him and he simply despises Skulduggery. But thats not whats actually interesting. The Chapter reveals him to be self important. Sure, hes a leader, stoic, goal oriented. But hes also cocksure of himself. (A trait he shares with about 84% of all characters in the SP universe).

Skulduggerys taunts go right over him.

"Skulduggery nodded. "So, you married or something? Do I hear the pitter patter of tiny evil feet?"

"I will destroy you."

Normal reaction, ey? The scene goes on quite a while longer than that, but only hammers home this point even more.

The Baron believes himself superior. Righteous. Blessed, probably.

What kills him in the end? His self importance. And how does he react to his death?

"But... But this isnt how Im supposed to die", He said weakly. "Not... Not like this. Not by your hand. You're... You're an abomination."

And then he crawls towards the actual abomination he summoned, pleads it to tell them (the Faceless Ones) that hes sorry for failing them.

The Grotesquery moved its hand so that it touches Vengous' face. It looked almost tender, until the hand gripped and wrenched and the Barons head snapped to one side.

Vengous is a fascinating villain, because he stands calmly among the flashy and vibrant. In a long line of batshit insane people, his insanity is the one that hits closest to home. Many, many villains in the future would be obsessed with religion (the Necromaner Temple, the whole Diablerie plot, later on Darquesse). But all of them are so overpainted, so saturated, that many are just that: A mockery of real life fanaticism.

And the Baron still feels like someone who is rootes in reality. He truly believes that he and the Faceless Ones are superior. His last act is - and I cannot stress this enough - apologising to his gods.

This man. This stoic, straightforward man. This absolute unit. Former General of Mevolent. Words like a scalpel, tactician, wit and gumption combined.

Hes just as insane as all of them. But his insanity is so much quieter. So much more refined.

And that makes him scary.

While I would like to end here, lets summarise real quick:

Vengous has mostly two traits that make him stand out: Straightforwardness and Fanaticism.

Hes a pretty boring villain in comparison to his counterparts.

He is - at least in my opinion - one of the most realistic villains in the series. His insanity is believable and while its not as flashy as those of others, its a kind of insane that makes your skin crawl as soon as you think about it.

He stole Skulduggerys Armor. If you know that Skulduggery is Vile, there are some really interesting scenes that allude to it.

His Leibniz counterpart, for once, seems to actually improve on the OG one. He talks more and he even shows a certain twisted kindness to Valkyrie in explaining her everything. I would almost argue that the Baron of Leibniz is more interesting than the OG Baron. Also, silly wife Eliza. Such a stupid joke.

If he had been succesful, he would have actually ruined the world. Legitimately. The stakes were so high and the man remained so calm. Imagine trying to resurrect your gods. Imagine resurrecting Jesus, all the while having the vibes of a Military Dad with PTSD.

Im afraid that I never found Vengous that compelling. The writing in Book 2 is immaculate though and Dusk and Sanguine are amazing.

I give him a... 7? 8 out of 10?

Also: remember to stay hydrated. Eat a snack. Stretch. You deserve it.

Wanna read more of my mad ramblings? Heres Part 1 with Nefarian Serpine and Part 3 with Batu!

#skulduggery pleasant #baron vengous #character analysis #ramble post #again this is way too long #literary analysis #villain #sorry y'all #SP villains

[dandelionflowery]

Intro post!

(if you're looking for the breast cancer awareness post it is here)

HII!!

My name on the internet is Dandelion, but you can call me whatever you like honestly. It's so hard to find a good name around here, the fae keep stealing them

I use any pronouns, online people default to they/them, IRL people default to she/her, you can use whatever you feel like!

I'm aroace 🧡💛🤍🩵💙 and my gender is up to interpretation lol

I'm 16 and I live in France but I have both French and American citizenship

I have both scoliosis (diagnosed, 45°) and probably dyslexia (not officially diagnosed but all the internet tests I did were screaming at me to go get an official diagnosis) and those two really hate each other who deCIDED SCOLISOIS SHOULD BE SPELLED THE WAY IT IS (if i spell it correctly be aware that either I copied it from somewhere, or i thought about it for WAY too long, or it was a monkeys on keyboards thing)

I created a blog just for reblogging shit (aptly named @dandelionflowery-reblogs) but even with that I can't promise to tag stuff correctly on either...

I'm not often super active on here, at least not regularly, mostly because I have way too many classes but sometimes I go absolutely insane and spend like an entire day on here (oops)

~~☆~~

I like:

- Harry Potter (Drarry, Deamus, Romione, Linny are my main ships but there's a decent chance you could get me to like a specific portrayal of just about any pairing lol) [also fuck jkr]

- The Marauders (WOLFSTARRR! Also Jily and aroace Peter and maybe Remadora. Same thing as before: open to other pairings [I know of and appreciate the ships with the girls but usually I'll lean towards the first ones mentioned actually I'll lean towards wolfstar with background Jily and aa battery Peter)

- Reading and books in general

- Fanfics, fanart!! (Both writing/drawing them and reading/simping for them)

Speaking of which, I have a side blog that's actually technically marauders themed! @mybrain-fanficedition

- Interactions on here!!

- there's probably some other stuff I like but I can't think of anything rn

~~☆~~

I don't like:

- Following from above, I said I was open to pretty much any pairing, ... I lied lol

I don't really like adult/child pairings (especially not snarry) but I am still open to at least trying it, but it is much much harder to convince me about that

- That said, irl adult/child is very bad and dni if you think it should be a thing in real life, fanfic is fiction do not attempt

- Also the usual list of if you're homophobic transphobic uh racist or just a generally mean person

~~☆~~

I like talking to people even if you don't know what to say just say hi!

Also I have other social media, come find me if you want!

@/flowerydandelion, @/dandelionfloweryart and @/wands.swords.and.books on Instagram!

On Ao3 I'm like 90% sure it's DandelionFlowery and uh probably similar usernames on Discord and Reddit [though I'm not often active on there]

Wait if I link my ao3 that means i need to actually post my fics lol

Leave comments if you read my fics, I love feedback!! (or just leave kudos, it makes me irrationally happy lol)