#also got to see my cousins who aren’t my cousins (only ones my age) and i love and miss them so much too 😭🖤

[deklo]

just went to a celebration of life for someone my parents’ age and saw so many of their friends who i haven’t seen in years and they’re all the best most fun people ever :( and they’re all getting old and im also getting old :(

#it was so cute but also so weird #to see them all in one room together again #it’s the type of party i grew up going to #so many of them kept talking about how they would babysit us in the back of the bar :( and now we drink and party with them for real :( #and i love them all so much :(((( #also got to see my cousins who aren’t my cousins (only ones my age) and i love and miss them so much too 😭🖤

[oscarthedino]

Jeremiah x reader

Summary: y/n Conklin is the middle sister of Steven and belly. You have been dating Conrad sense last summer but lately you have been noticing he was off. As summer is now approaching fast you can’t wait to see him and also hope you can figure out what is going on with him but you can’t believe what actually is in store for you.

Warnings: cursing, mention of death/cancer, cheating, possibly assault and smut

(Not my gif)

Every summer sense you could remember was spent in cousins with the fishers. You were the middle child of the Conklin’s, Steven is the oldest and belly is the baby. You and belly aren’t that far apart in age you are actually in the same year at school.

You and her have an ok relationship but you don’t have much in common. Belly is amazing at volleyball and the only time you have picked one up was a few summers ago and Steven hit it to hard and it nailed you right in the nose. Good to say you haven really picked one up sense and weren’t very good. You liked to stick to track and track sports.

You have always known belly has liked Conrad it was very obvious, Even Susanna knew. You all knew belly was the favorite it was obvious I mean she was the baby of the family. Susanna used to tell you she knew at least one of you would end up with her boys and deep down you hoped it would be you. You always thought Susanna knew you liked Conrad to but didn’t tell you. She always called you the most mature and reasonable out of all of you. You were the one who solved the arguments or gave something up to make the rest happy and didn’t cause stupid fights. One time when Susanna bought everyone ice cream when all of you where at the boardwalk Steven and belly where fighting and Steven knocked belly’s ice cream out of her hand. Belly ran back to the moms like she always did. I tried to stop her knowing that it would just make everything worse but it didn’t work. Laural was always worried about money and felt bad when Susanna would buy things for us so she made Steven share hers with belly. Steven was so mad about it that he almost threw his away just to spite her but I gave belly line before he could. When Susanna asked I told her my stomach hurt from the rides so you didn’t even want it. She pulled you into a hug and told you how nice you were to everyone. You always worried about how nice or open hearted I guess you were laural always told you to be careful because people will take advantage of it. Conrad ended up sharing his with you. You think that was the moment you realized you liked him.

That was 3 years ago. Now you are on the way to cousins and can’t wait to see everyone especially Conrad. You guys have almost been saying for a year now. He asked you to be his girlfriend officially last summer and ofc you said yes. Ever since then though belly hasn’t been as open with you. You understand that she is upset but you couldn’t help it. You guys got in a giant fight when you told her like you expected but it didn’t make it any easier. Conrad told you it would be ok and she would get over it eventually and he would try to talk to her. You were always jealous of the two of them. They were super close I mean you guys were but in a different way. You have always been closer to Jeremiah. You guys did everything with each other especially When Steven and Conrad would randomly disappear to do their own thing. You had a tradition of sneaking out to the beach the first night and catching each other up on everything.

All of a sudden you get pulled out of you trance by belly obnoxiously singing from the passenger seat and Steven yelling from the drivers seat to shut up. You look over to your mom and see her silently laughing. You never see your mom this happy except in cousins. But this year she seems even happier I don’t know if it’s she’s just excited, happy to be divorced which was still pretty fresh from everyone and hurt for you still or , the fact her book was going good and she had a meeting about it today.

Belly looks back at me still singing and I chime in now singing just as loud and we both start laughing with Steven says “ I’m this close to cutting my ears off and pulling this car over right now if you both don’t shut up”

You and belly both look at each other and sing even louder and Steven looks and that both of you and lets out a loud groan.

You guys stop at the convenience store before you guys head to the house you decide that you want to wait in the car instead of go in. When everyone gets back belly has a huge smile on her face and Steven looks disgusted. You’re about to ask what happened but then your mom gets back in the car you tell yourself to ask Steven later because you doubt belly will tell you. Before you know it you’re pulling up to the summer house.

Steven immediately b-lined it out of the car as soon as he saw Jeremiah come out of the house my mom followed after. You are about to the get out of the car as you see belly fixing her hair and you immediately feel a twig of jealousy. “Come belly you can do that later” you tell her and she gives you a small nod almost looking mad.

You get out of the car and immediately see Jeremiah giving your mom a hug. He spots you from behind her and you see the biggest goofiest smile that you have only ever seen on jere. As soon as he gets to you his arms surround you. I mean he has always been taller than you but he has definitely grown some. I knew he was in football now and he definitely had more muscle but he is also taller 6 feet if not taller. While you have stayed around 5,3 5,4. “You have changed so much” I tell him as I pull back from the hug “ so did you” he says “ I mean I know I have kinda seen you a few mouth ago but..” he takes a step back to fully look at you.

I mean you have changed a lot in the last year you’re now on the bigger side of a C cup and have filled out more in other places but you also feel a little different. It also hasn’t been that long since you have Jere technically. You and Conrad try to go out and see each other every few mouths or sooner when you get the chance but he is really busy with football and you are very focused on school so the trips are usually short and don’t really get a chance to see Jeremiah or Susanna much. “I see your not the only who changed” Jeremiah says loud enough so that belly who is behind you can hear as he moves to give her a hug picking her up and spinning her.

You see Susanna at the door and you see what almost looks like pride and so much love in her eyes. You go up to her and give her the biggest hug ever. “I’ve missed you so much” you tell her “it’s only been a few months sweetie” “Exactly it’s been to long” you respond with holding back the biggest smile as she kisses your forehead.

You look over your shoulder and see Conrad come into view. Susanna looks over “ go say hi don’t let me stop you” she tells you “ thank you” you tell her giving her one more squeeze before heading over to him.

Your smile is so big now you have missed Conrad so much. As you walk over to him you can’t help to notice who he is staring at, belly. You try to not think into and just tell yourself he hasn’t seen her in a long time longer then you at it’s nothing but you can’t help but be a little jealous. When he sees you in his peripheral vision he immediately turns to you. You can’t help but notice the sadness and almost disappoint in his eyes before he covers it up with a smile. You jump into his arms and immediately Barrie your face in his chest. “Ive missed you so much” you tell him almost coming out as a mumble because your face is in his shirt. His hand comes up to your hair before he tilts your chin up to kiss you and says “I have missed you so much more”.

You guys don’t get many more words out before Jeremiah and Steven yell from where they are standing “I think it’s time for a belly flopppp”. You immediately look at them and at belly before the boys start chasing her and she doesn’t get far. As the Carry her to the pool you go ahead of them to open the gate and watch as the count the three and throw her in. Before you know it Jeremiah and Steven get that look that you have seen many times before. They all run at you and you don’t even get 3 steps before they are throwing you in the pool to. Your immediately surrounded by water and as you come up to the surface for a breath the boys are all hunched over laughing except for Conrad who is barley laughing in the corner. You and belly look at each other knowing what to do. “Owwww my ankle hurts guy seriously can someone help me” belly says to the boys. Conrad immediately comes up concerned and you can’t help but feel the same jealousy you did earlier. He reaches his hand out to belly and she pulls him in.

Steven and Jeremiah are now laughing even harder. “Ok guys I’m done, jere please help me out” you ask him “Ok ok fine” he tells you also giving you his hand before you pull him in to.

Steven looks to be in tears now and jere asks him “come on bro don’t you want to be apart of the fun”. “No im good on missing this fun” he tells us still laughing as he walks inside.

You over to see what happened to Conrad and see him and belly inches apart staring at each other before belly pushes him away and you can hear her barley say “what’s your problem” before swimming away.

What the fuck was that, you didn’t even want to know but something pinged inside your chest. You got out after belly went inside and no one stopped you. Conrad didn’t even say anything

#jeremiah fisher #jeremiah fisher x reader #team jeremiah #tsitp jeremiah #Jeremiah

[depressopax]

Before it's too late

Nacho Varga x gn!reader

Fandom - Better call Saul

Yoo! I haven't posted in ages, been feeling down and mentally exhausted 😭 Also been writing on my very own novel for a school project AHHH Basically been writing, procrastinating, writing, etc etc... But so far so good!

Now then... ✨Angst time✨

Pairing: Nacho Varga x gender neutral reader Genre: Angst, hurt/comfort Warning(s): BCS SPOILERS! Based on s4e3 “Something Beautiful”. Major character injury. Mentions of death and violence. Blood. Guns and bullet wounds. Cuss words. Mentions of surgery. Reader is gender-neutral and has they/them pronouns Words: 1.6K Summary: Based on s4e3, in which Nacho gets shot by Victor and is left in the desert. After being saved by the Cousins, reader rushes to the vet office to see him.  English is not my main language, if I make any spelling mistakes please let me know so I can improve my writing! <3 || AO3 link || Masterlist || Request ||

The sun is burning in Albuquerque today, making the concrete and highways threateningly warm. It’s an early morning and will only get hotter. The streets are empty and people are either sleeping safely in their beds or avoiding the burning morning-light. It’s a perfect day to stay in the shadows or - for those who have the option - close to the fresh breeze from the AC. 

Not everyone has that option. 

But bleeding to death in the desert is a rare case, too. 

This is how I die. 

Nacho thinks. He’s lost track of time. The man is lying on his side, facing away from the sun and hoping it will protect him from a sunburn. It’s the last thing he needs right now. 

The wounded shoulder is enough. His hands are bloody and so is the warm sand he is facing. 

Dehydration and blood loss. - That was not the way he thought he’d go down.

If it weren’t for the sharp pain in his shoulder - that’s slowly spreading throughout every inch of his body - he’d feel angry and humiliated.

Gus and his men left him to bleed out in the middle of nowhere. The damn Chicken Man. 

Arturo is dead. 

Nacho? About to join Arturo in the afterlife. 

His mind is bitter and he’s losing the battle of patience. 

“Do it quick, before you pass out” - That was the words of Gus’ lap dog, Victor. He was quick. Directly after he was left bleeding, he dialed the number to them. The Cousins. 

Where are they? 

He’s lost count if it's been days, hours or minutes since he got shot. All he knows is that he is slowly going insane. The sun burns his neck and he lets out a grunt, opening and closing his dry mouth. There's a taste of iron on his tongue due to his dry, chapped lips. 

Water. His vision gets blurry and with gloomy eyes he looks at the wet, red sand under him. 

They’re not coming. Those fuckers aren’t on their way. 

I’m dead. 

The realization hits Nacho, fueling the pain he’s already feeling. 

Dad. 

Guilt washes over him. What will happen to his dad if he dies? That, and…

He whispers your name hoarsely. 

You. His beautiful partner. The one who’s always been by his side, the only one that knows about and doesn’t judge him for his fucked up choices and his chaotic life. The person he’s been so distant and cold towards lately. Worst part is… 

They have no idea how much I love them. 

“I love you” - A sentence yet to be said. So many emotions are left unspoken, so many things left unsaid. 

Without thinking or caring about the consequences, Nacho reaches for his phone. With shaky, bloody hands, he dials your number and listens to the waiting tone. 

“Ignacio?” A soft voice filled with concern says. Nacho smiles. 

“Did I wake you up?”

“Yea… But don’t worry. What’s up, Nacho?”

The silence lingers. What the hell is he supposed to reply? 

“I gotta tell you something.”

“Nacho… What is going on? Are you ok?”

“No… But listen, mi amor.”

“Ignacio…-”

“I love you.” Silence again. His voice cracks from the emotions “...I love you so fucking much.”

“Why does it feel like you’re saying goodbye?”

“...Because I am.” His voice is barely a whisper anymore. “Take care of my father for me, will you?” 

Your voice breaks on the other line. 

“Where are you?”

No reply. You realize it’ll stay that way. He is too stubborn to let you help him. As if accepting defeat, you break apart.

“Don’t cry, mi vida…” He whispers.

“Please don’t die. Please.” 

I promise. Nacho wants to reply. But the last thing he wants to do right now is give you false hope. So he stays quiet. His ears are ringing and he wonders how he still has blood left in his body. 

“I’m sorry.”

“I love you, Ignacio. I love you…”

He smiles in relief. That was all he needed to hear. 

It’s all said and done and now he can at least die with some peace.

“And I love you.” 

He hangs up.

When a character faces death in movies, they see their life flash before their eyes. 

A cliche. Nacho thought up until now.

He envisions the few happy and peaceful moments he’s had in life. Most of them involve his dad Manuel, and you. The first date, first kiss, first time… 

Maybe it’s the sun or maybe he’s actually walking into the light, when suddenly a shadow covers it. He grunts. 

In the distance, he can hear two men talking to each other in Spanish. Someone lifts him from the ground. 

Exhaustion catches up with Nacho and everything fades to black. 

You almost kick open the door to the Veterinary Office. 

How you even got the address is a miracle.

Maybe because you’ve called Nacho’s phone at least twenty times within the last hour, or maybe because they know Nacho has a partner? That seems unlikely. Nacho has made sure to keep the relationship secret from everyone, to protect you. Only people that know that he is your boyfriend are Manuel Varga and your family. 

The last explanation… Maybe, somehow, Nacho’s Cartel colleagues are humane enough to let family and friends say farewell to their dying loved ones… 

Apart from an elderly lady and her cat, the waiting room is empty at this time in the morning. The receptionist looks startled when she sees you. But then again you can’t judge her. With puffy and red eyes and the almost wild expression on your face it’s no wonder people are concerned. Without waiting for her to greet you, you rush to the office whilst the woman shouts after you. 

Nothing can prepare you for what you see. 

It’s your boyfriend - lying down half-naked on a metal table whilst the vet, Caldera, performs surgery. Two men in suits stand next to the tense vet, watching over his every move with caution. As the door shuts behind you, the three men turn to look at you. One of the twins raises their guns. 

“What happened to him?!” A voice barely noticeable. The man lowers his gun as his brother mumbles something to him. The vet goes back to work and Nacho squirms on the table. They’re killing him. 

You know that's not true and makes zero sense. 

But what makes sense about this situation either way? 

You don’t realise that you’re shouting allegations until someone grips you and drags you out of the room. Before you get kicked out of the office, a weak voice calls your name. 

Nacho. 

Minutes turn into hours, morning turns to day and then afternoon. You remain seated on the cold tile floor hugging your knees against your chest. The anxiety grows stronger and it feels like you’re about to drown in worry. When the door to the office finally opens, you can barely stand up. 

It’s impossible to read the expression on his face. The scrubs he’s wearing are stained red. You can feel your stomach twist. 

“He’s alive.” 

Nacho wakes up from his feverish dreams. His mind is foggy and his eyes feel heavy. The sedatives are wearing off and his whole body aches, especially the place where the bullets penetrated his shoulder. 

He is in a cold room with his bare back resting against an even colder metal table. He feels like shit. With a raspy voice, he repeats the only word he’s been able to say lately. Your name. When a warm hand intertwines fingers with him, he finally breathes out. 

Your sobbing wakes him from his trance. He opens his brown eyes and looks at you through heavy eyelids and black eyelashes. He manages to give you a weak smile and in a raspy voice, he greets you.

“Hey, mi vida.”

“Hey, my love.” You reply and manage to smile through the tears. “You’re alive…” 

With those words said, you burst into tears again. The cousins and Caldera look uncomfortable with the emotional outbursts and the scene between the two lovebirds.

“...Let’s give Varga and his partner some time to talk.” the vet says. He’s quick to leave and the twin men don't protest. 

Once finally alone, Nacho brings a weak, trembling hand to your cheek. He feels the soft skin against his palm and feels a sense of relief. When you lean forward he doesn’t think twice before pulling you into a kiss, and then another one. 

He’s alive. 

“I love you. I should’ve told you earlier, I… I’m sorry.” 

Your boyfriend tries sitting up and winces in pain. 

“You don’t need to apologize.” 

He can no longer hold back the wave of emotions. The shock of watching Arturo die, the stress Hector and his nephews have caused him, for years. The worries for his own life, but mostly for his dad, and you. It all comes crashing down. And now… Gus is a threat.

Nacho knows his life just got more complicated and a lot more dangerous. 

He’ll have to tell you everything. 

But for now… 

He cries. He lets you hold onto him. 

Nacho squeezes you close to him, to make sure you can’t slip away. 

Once he’s healed, he’ll go back to duty. He’ll protect you.

But for now… He lets you protect him. 

When you whisper “I love you”, he feels at peace. 

You’re his shelter and his home.

Did my mentally unstable a- cry when writing this because I love Nacho so damn much?? Yes. 2am emotional damage

#nacho varga x reader #breaking bad #better call saul #x reader #nacho varga #nacho x reader #ignacio varga #brbabcs #fanfiction writer #fanfic authors #fanfic writing #hurt/comfort #angst #major character injury #breaking bad fanfic #breaking bad fanfiction #better call saul fanfic #nacho smut #nacho x gn!reader #breaking bad x reader #better call saul x reader #better call saul spoilers #breaking bad scenario #breaking bad angst #aspiring author #aspiring writer #brba #bcs #breaking bad fandom #ao3 writer

[jackiequick]

The day she got brought in | Agents Of SHIELD Fanfic

Summary: What if the thing you were waiting for came at the the wrong time? Or in Amelia Parker’s case, when she was street racing in Puerto Rico to let off a little steam after being rejected by her schools.

Pairing: Amelia Parker & Grant Ward, Rick Banner x Luna Marsh

Characters mentioned: Phil Coulson, Bobbi Morse, Lance Hunter, Grant Ward, Melissa Wallace and etc.

——

It’s been months. But it felt like years for her. She has been told time and time again she wasn’t surely good enough to be apart of certain schools. Regretted time and time for the schools she applied to. Only two accepted her but she wasn’t too pleased.

She never wanted to go to college to be exact.

But she need a career. She wanted a future.

Something interesting.

So she applied for SHIELD Academy at a certainly young age. She knew that SHIELD existed ever since she just a little girl, especially after the accident that happened at Stark Expo.

She thought there was a huge possibility that she would get in. Her cousin, Peter Parker, parents were agents of shield themselves before they died. On top of that, her aunt Bobbi and uncle Hunter are agents as well!

So she studied, practiced her skills and tried to explain herself in every letter as a someone who deserved a chance. A chance to help SHIELD future agents and heroes. Since Amelia was good at boxing, had a huge hand when it came to sewing, believing she’s pretty okay with a computer and had communication skills. Also well as scouting places and some design.

However after every letter and application, she kept getting rejected.

Then she thought it about, why am I not surprised? My grades aren’t too good, my only concern is that I’m too emotional for the field and my records were bad.

~~~~~

She’s a street kid for gods sake! Her actions didn’t measure up, hanging out with a so called “wrong crowd” according to the police, stealing parts and racing borrowed cars while earning cash on the side. The girl sounded like a young criminal.

And honestly she didn’t care, she loved it. The music, the people, the rush you get from being behind the wheel, the talks and the community built around it. The type of people she met made her smile.

There wasn’t too many rules and no one questioned whether you were good enough. Because if you ask a racer, any real racer doesn’t matter if you win by a inch or a mile, winning is winning. It’s all about passion and love for the lifestyle.

Currently she sat behind her wheel, sliding down towards the area where everyone was at. Her mind was running a mile a minute.

Puerto Rico baby! The smell of food from the streets, the music blasting from cars, people chatting with one another, laughing being shared. The men in and women were dresses in the best mood you ever seen.

People from every race and backgrounds crowded the area. It felt like heaven

Amelia parked her blue skyline in a perfect scene nearby a few shaded orange, deep green and hot rod red cars. She was dressed black short skirt, a deep gray top and a red flannel. Black sneaker. Her curls were loosely bouncing around as she walked over to a small group.

“Ahh! Look who showed up!” Yelled Nico giving her a hug.

“Girl we thought you weren’t gonna make it.” Shouted Kira chuckling.

“Be nice, be nice! She was just fashionably late to the party.” Added Jesse, joking around holding up his cash for tonight.

The group walked and talked, grabbing a bite to eat as they catches up with one another. Talking about their deals and how they were planning a small heist for extra gasoline to sell at Jesse’s shop. But first Amelia need to check out the competition and sneak into other locations to exchange a few items.

They were in a middle questioned when she asked.

Amelia rolled her eyes chuckling, “Your hilarious, all of you. Who’s the racing tonight?”

“Ok I’ll tell you!” Nico explained everyone who racing that night and even added, “You see the tall blonde over there with the pretty brunette around his arms? They’re racing the first round tonight.”

It nighttime so she couldn’t see them too well. Still she tried to looked over across the crowd, to see blonde with dark eyes carrying a cheeky grin.

And his girlfriend was wearing a puffy jacket and shyly giggles to what he was talking about. She taught they must’ve been an adorable little couple, secretly ready to wipe the floor with them.

She didn’t think too much of it. However her friend, Kira, was more interested in how they raced.

But they didn’t have to wait for long, since the moment Kira said, “Ready, set, go!”

They were off. And they were fasted! Rushing around the stores, turning up the furious speed, passing through a crowd of cars, and sliding across small obstacles to get to the finish line.

Impressive. Very impressive. 

The brunette won first, and a few others coming in at a close second. She screamed and smiled shyly at winning as one of the other racer went to congratulate her. The rest of the crowd clapped and cheered.

But Amelia wasn’t paying too much attention as she clapped, checking her phone and the corners of the road behind them.

Hoping cops didn’t came. Watching their backs.

When it was her time to race in the second round, she jumped into her skyline and joked with the other racers.

Once again, Kira started yelling loudly “Go!”. Amelia made it and snappy.

Turning up the NOS when needed, taking a left turn to pass another car and even flipped off another race who tried to cut her off. Speeding off, switching on the radio, laughing and watching the other cars driven past her.

In the end, she didn’t win but she didn’t care. She had fun feeling the rush behind the wheel, being free in her seat and all her worries were thrown away focused on the road instead.

But she hopes were broken, as Jesse yelled out, “Cops are coming!”

Her eyes widen muttering, “Shit!”

~~~~~

Everyone jumped into their races, speeding off quicker than expected. Once she hoped she was out of clear an hour later, Amelia sneaked into an small old facility of full cars.

She held up her flashlight towards the back end of each vehicle.

Beautiful. Each one styled differently and wonderfully useful.

She looked around to find the place empty as she snapping pictures and started to pop off the hood of an car.

The girl was lucky to find a gorgeous cherry red convertible. Hell, she would kill to just have this for a drive to the beach.

Before she could get her hands on soft inventor and possibly get a better look at this reliable beauty…

..she heard it.

She turned off her phone as she started rushing to hide behind boxes and corners. But she was too late.

She woke up, in the hallway nearby the exist. Blinking she turned to face a young man, not even 20 yet with dark hair and brown eyes.

He wasn’t bad but stupid.

“Eugene. I meant nothing.” She told him, with a sigh.

He chuckled, “So why the hell are you here?”

“You were hoarding cars, jackass!”

“They’re mine, babygirl and I’mma use them.”

“Ha! You stole half of them and redesigned the older ones. Pumping up the gasoline and ordering NOS.”

“You need a 5-second car.”

“10 second car. And I was just looking over them, honest.”

Eugene scoff, “You’re not half bad, Ames. But you gotta know not to mess with me.”

“I’m not sure about that. Be lucky it wasn’t, Jesse or Nico. You had worse than us.” She added, knowing they would do something crazier than her.

“Don’t ever come around here again!”

“No promises!”

Eugene made a move to grab her but she elbowed him in the face. He spinner her around, pushing her against the wall but she kicked him where the sun don’t shine.

~~~~

Amelia made a run for it, still ending up with a bruise or two. Pulling out her mini pistol, just in case. She wasn’t the greatest at theses things but still she tried her best.

She walked down the street, popping up her jacket and started up her engine driving off.

But when she thought her night couldn’t get any odder or worse. The polices she raced from earlier found her.

Amelia was thrown into a cell, hearing the police report about her as the cops walked away. She tried to defend her case but they only have half listened.

They cleared her up for the self defense part but still pissed off about what she did.

It was no use per say.

Amelia’s face dropped. It wasn’t her first time running around from the cops and getting caught up in a mess and it sadly won’t be her last.

It was the trill of life. She sighed as tears came rolling in, mumbling how stupid she was. No career, no school, no actually friends and possibly no one to bail her out.

Disappointed.

She was a good girl or at least that’s what she wants to believe.

She always did schoolwork but never past a lot of classes cause no one took the chance on her. Actually help her understand it! She treated her family with respect, earned money during races to help pay the bills, worked low jobs and such.

But never got a chance to prove herself, they always tell her that she need experience and or worse, no one believed she had the true patience to get a job done.

Everything felt like a balancing act for her. Keep her head up, even when she wants to keep it down.

Playing up the act of the cool, confident, somewhat edgy and sweet girl. The wannabe bad bitch who gossips, talks shit about others and let’s the rumors fly in.

But she ain’t really that. Yeah sure, she got a temper, gets stressed out easily sometimes and has a thick glare that meant she got shit she wants to get done, but still.

She doesn’t know want she wants. No one ever does.

“Miss Parker?” Said a male voice, light but thick.

She turned to face the man, standing up wiping her tears to get a better look. To her surprise it was too men.

One younger and somewhat fresher faced than the other. They were wearing all black, comb hair expect for the younger one who’s hair was a little messy, wearing sensitive shoes and shared a gentle expression.

“W-who are you?” She asked, softly with hitched voice.

“Agent Coulson from SHIELD.” Said the man, “You’re having one hell of a day, huh?”

“Grant Ward.” Said the other one with a half smile, “You’re younger than expected.”

She blinked with tears trying to figure it out how this happened and asked, “Wh-what? I—how?…oh god.”

“I know it’s tricky to explain. But we’re here to help.” Coulson said, seeing the poor look in her eyes.

“Really? No offense, but where were you months ago?! I sent letters, applications for programs, video of myself for a visual idea of who I am…”

“I’m sorry we didn’t come soon but you were rejected for some of our supervisors believing you were not trying enough.”

“Hell, I saw that videos and it was a little dry. Besides, you sounded like it wasn’t serious enough..” Ward added.

“Your hilarious, Ward.” Amelia replied with a half sarcastic tone, “Sorry I wasn’t what you expected. I’m sorry that I was not perfect enough for you guys. Especially you.”

“Yet, you lack self esteem, confidence and the strength that is needed determination for something.”

“Determination?! You rejected me! You don’t take a chance on anyone.”

“But I’m not wrong. Have you seen your records? Jail time, street races for money, and stealing from second hand stores. Do your parents know about this?”

“…i um…not exactly everything…”

“Exactly. If you had any bit of respect for yourself and self care, you would deal with what you have. Look where you are now. I just see a pathetic picture of a young woman.”

“Okay look, I screwed up big time! I don’t have any track record for something good or anything…but i know I can do the same thing as you! I’m sorry for what happened..”

“Sorry?! You don’t know what you want or what exactly is your play here. ”

“Hey! I don’t—”

Coulson spoke up, “Enough! Ward, play nice, not everyone has their hands full time in the world as you. And Parker, I understand that you’re not sure where you stand. I apologize on SHIELD behavior, but I was given a chance to see your responses..”

“And? Coulson, you and Ward clearly just came to do what? Bail me out or something? I’m a idiot according to him and he’s right..” Amelia admitted, sadly.

“He’s wrong. You done some bad things because you don’t feel comfortable or worth other peoples time. Your smart, kind, seemed determined to race together even if you didn’t win—”

“You saw?!”

“I did. Or at least I scout here who used to work with me did. But Amelia you’re not an idiot, you just need someone who can give you a chance to try and do good. Because you are good.”

“Who told you that? I’m not smart enough to pass a few simple classes or good enough for you before. You guys didn’t give me a chance to prove that I’m good for something…”

“Because I wasn’t there before and I didn’t have agent Lance Hunter to tell me about you. Your not exactly school smart for certain things, but your street smart and clever with a lot of stuff. Your easygoing, sometimes honest and if I’m correct, you see a lot in someone.”

“I..um..”

“I’m being honest when I say your not bad. Never were, just chose to go do something that others think is wrong. I’ll like a give you a chance to come study and work together with SHIELD. You may be nervous and not feel ready for it now, but I believe you might be.”

Amelia stay speechless hearing Agent Coulson’s words and the recommendations he heard from Hunter. She didn’t know that part. The only person other than her stepdad and mother to speak like that to her.

Even Ward had to admit to himself he read the whole letters and applications, finding it actually charming. He didn’t know what Coulson saw in her but he kinda like it.

The only thing she could do was nod rapidly because of how tired she was and unable to comprehend what happened. It’s late. It’s 1:40am.

And she was just offered to be apart of something she didn’t expect to get after wishing and imaging the role.

Ward went to front desk to bail her out with a smile. Once she was let out of her cell, she thanked Ward as he apologized for his comments earlier. He told her that he’s welcome to help her with any needs

Then she turned to Coulson with tears in her eyes once again, thanking him. He smiled softly pulling her in a hug, knowing she needed it.

Phil held her in his arms, whispering kind words.

Honestly he felt bad, he didn’t catch onto her case earlier and made a decision to bend the SHIELD Academy rules.

He would need to speak with Fury and Hill but he knew there were plenty of people like her who needed a chance to be heard.

He remembered that Darcy Lewis had a daughter as well with a interesting case, he decided to possibly message Hill later about that. Plenty of cases of young folk who would be suitable for SHIELD or a Team in the future, but they need that push to do so.

Coulson smiled, walking out with Ward and Amelia in his thoughts. He wondered what if they were to recruit a set of young people one day, they definitely deserve a chance to be seen or heard.

Amelia snapped him out of his thought, “So um, when do we—I start my studies?”

Ward spoke up instead with a soft smile to her answers, “Soon. In about less than a month. You will have me and a few other people to help you along the way, Miss Parker.”

“You can all me Amelia.”

“Then you can me Grant.”

Both smile, exchanging phone numbers. Coulson told her a few more things before they brought her back to the hotel she was staying at.

~~~~~

Once Amelia said her final goodbye, she locked the door to her room behind her and let out a small sequel as she bit her bottom lip. To say when the realization finally hit her was an understatement. She felt scared, nervous and maybe a little excited.

She wondered what if no one likes me? What if it goes bad my first day? Oh my god what if i suck and they kick me out?!

She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. Anxiety still in the front of her mind, but laying low.

Her mind was overwhelmed by the thoughts, as she picked up her phone to thank her uncle Hunter for the placement.

Little did she know the next few months will change her life forever.

Meeting one of her best friends Melissa Wallace, get to know a couple of crushes such as Nikolai Morozov and a few other friends. Even encourage Melissa to go on a date with a special girl. As well as a future lifetime of opportunity and memories to come.

—-

Thank you for reading! What did you think about it?

Pls like, comment, reblog and share with friends

Tags: @gaminggirlsstuff @msrochelleromanofffelton @gcthvile @meiramel @hanlueluver @rooster-84 @superspookyjanelle @mandylove1000 @triptuckers @blackheart-beauty @yetanotherwells @withakindheartx and etc

#agents of s.h.i.e.l.d. #street race #amelia #the avengers initiative #phil coulson #grant ward #danielle campbell #marvel x oc #marvel fancast #marvel fanfic writer #fyeahmarvelocs #bruce banner #aunt may #fast and furious #aos fanfic

[thewayofthemandalorian]

can’t we hit rewind (second, third, and hundredth chances - epilogue)

Pairing: Dieter Bravo x F!Reader (past)

Rating: M 

Word count: 1,388

Summary: Six years after you made it clear you wanted nothing to do with him, Dieter Bravo finds a lost child in a store, who has no idea what his connection is to her.

Notes: I know I said I was done with this. But this won’t leave me alone and then listening to The Fear by The Shins pushed me back into the rabbit hole (I would recommend listening to that while reading this). This is the last part to what was supposed to be a singular one-shot that just wouldn’t leave me alone. Written in the drafts, so forgive any wonkiness.

Warnings: Angst, lost child, swearing, references to drug use and infidelity (from the first part), pregnancy mention

main fic || deleted scenes || masterlist (main) || masterlist (dieter bravo)

It’s a rainy Saturday afternoon in Chicago. The last time Dieter Bravo had been here was when he came to find you, to beg for your forgiveness. 

He hadn’t received that. Only received the bombshell that you wanted nothing to do with him, was pregnant with his daughter, and had moved on with another man. Dieter had kept his promise that he would stay away, wouldn’t keep in contact with his daughter. 

It was really fucking hard, especially in the early days after seeing what his actions had done to you, to keep on the wagon. There were some days where he was seconds away from calling his old dealers. But he had to stay clean. He couldn’t undo everything that he had worked so hard on. 

Six years later, he’s still clean, and has tried to revive his career, pouring himself into his work (when he can get work). It took a lot of convincing and a lot of proving himself to directors and studios. He hasn’t made a major tentpole movie in years, but has found a modicum of success for himself in smaller, indie projects. 

That’s why he’s here. To make a movie. He doesn’t know if he wants to see you or not. Keeps going back and forth. Chicago’s a pretty big city, though. And who knows? Maybe you’ve moved. 

He finds himself at the bookstore. The movie he’s shooting is based on a book and his cousin, Javi, the screenwriter, had been insistent that Dieter read the book first to fully understand his character. Usually he would ignore such demands and requests and just read the Sparksnotes version, but it’s not a very popular book and as such, there’s no entry. Plus, Javi got him this role, so he feels like he owes him. 

It’s a massive bookstore. They really like books in Chicago, he guesses. One thing he hasn’t minded about mostly fading into obscurity, is that no one pays attention to him anymore. It used to be rare that he go out in public and not be stopped for a selfie. The odd person will recognize him, but in a vague “aren’t you that guy...” kind of way. 

Book in hand, Dieter begins to meander his way through the maze of the bookstore, when he hears sniffling. It sounds like a child. Turning a corner, he finds a little girl sitting down, trying her very hardest not to cry, with limited success. She has a mop of curly brown hair, not dissimilar to his own hair when he was that age. She can’t be more than five or six. 

Dieter must make a sound because she looks up and his own eyes are staring back at him. 

Oh shit. 

“I can’t f-find my d-daddy,” his mini-me says and there is no doubt in his mind that this little girl is his daughter. It’s like looking in a mirror; she’s a perfect combination of mostly him and partially you. Thank god she inherited your nose, Dieter muses. 

I’m pretty sure I’m your daddy, Dieter thinks and almost says. Instead, he crouches down in front of her. “What’s your daddy’s name?” he asks, knowing that this will be the confirmation he needs, while also helping her. 

“S-Steven G-Grant. I’m Eliza. He to-told me t-t-to stay right here while he went to f-find something for Mama’s birthday.” 

Eliza Grant is one hundred percent his daughter.

After that fateful day when you came home, finding him strung out and in bed with Kate Edison, Dieter never forgot your birthday. Not once. 

“Well, I’m sure he’ll find you soon. Why don’t we go to the front so that they can make an announcement?” 

Eliza sniffs. “B-but Daddy said to st-stay put.” 

Every time Eliza calls Steven that and not Dieter, it stabs a little in his chest cavity. She should be calling him that. But he gave up that right the second he proved himself to be untrustworthy to you, the second he broke your heart. 

Dieter swallows the pain. “He sounds like a pretty smart guy, your dad. But it’s a big store, and that way he’ll know exactly where you are.” 

He knows how it sounds, and Eliza’s right to have stranger danger, but he has no intention of stealing her away. “Or at least go find a sales person,” he amends. “I’m sure he’s really worried about you, kid.” 

Eliza sniffles and nods. “Okay.” She clambers up onto her feet. “He really is the smartest, my daddy. He runs the tours at the museum. That’s how he and my Mama met. He’s not really my daddy; Mama told me that my real daddy made her really sad when I was still growing in her tummy because he wasn’t a nice man and she came here and met daddy.”

A thousand daggers pierce his heart. That is all his daughter knows about him. All she’ll ever know about him. As much as Dieter wants to tell her who he is to her, he knows it will only confuse and upset her. “I’m sorry to hear that, kid,” he manages to gruff out against the knot that’s formed in his throat. 

Eliza, completely oblivious, chatters on. “But daddy loves me like he is my real daddy. Even when my baby sister comes in two months, I’ll still be his special girl, too. He told me that when he and Mama told me about the new baby that’s growing in her tummy.” 

Dieter wishes he could hit rewind on the past seven years. Go back and do things differently so that he could be the one in this sweet girl’s life. Not hurt you over and over to the point of breaking. But he can’t. He doesn’t have that right. Dieter truly didn’t know what he had until it was too late. And that’s no one’s fault but his. 

“And daddy is my favourite person in the whole world. He reads to me and he takes me to the park and he helps me with my math homework and makes silly jokes.” 

Dieter nods, forces himself to speak. “He sounds great, sweetheart.” Eliza nods and before she can say anything else, Dieter spots a salesperson. “Over here. This lady can help us.” 

The saleswoman walks up to him and Eliza. “Can I help you?”

Can you help me undo all the mistakes that led to this? he wants to ask. He clears his throat. “I found this little girl in the fantasy section, she can’t find her dad.” 

The saleswoman looks between Eliza and Dieter, a curious look on her face for a split second. Dieter mentally wills her not to say anything about the obvious. “Of course, thank you for bringing her to me. I’ll make an announcement. What’s your name, sweetheart?” she asks Eliza.

“Eliza Grant. My daddy’s name is Steven Grant.”

The saleswoman walks over to the nearest PA speaker. “Can Eliza’s dad, Steven Grant please come to the biography section, please? That’s Steven Grant, Eliza’s dad, to the biography section.” She looks over to Dieter. “I can watch her if you need to get on with your day, sir.” 

Dieter nods, looks at Eliza for a split second. “Thank you,” he manages to get out to the saleswoman. 

“Thanks, mister,” Eliza says. 

“Sure thing, sweetheart,” he says gruffly before forcing himself to turn on his heel in the direction of the checkout. 

But before he can get too far, he sees Steven rushing in the direction of Eliza. “Sweetheart,” Steven cries. 

Dieter hears Eliza cry, “Daddy! I didn’t know where you were!” 

“I didn’t know where you were, Miss Muffet. I was so worried.” Steven scoops his daughter up his arms, the worry on his face melting to relief. Dieter spots a wedding ring on Steven’s finger. Between that and Eliza said about her baby sister, Dieter knows that’s it, then. “Who found you?” he hears Steven ask. 

“A man. He looked sad.” And ain’t that the truth. 

Book paid for, Dieter walks back out into the rain. There’s nothing he can do to change things with you or with Steven or with Eliza. But Eliza is well-loved and well-cared for. Dieter knows he’s run out of luck with getting you back. And he can’t change that. What happened, happened. All he can do now is move on with the knowledge that his daughter is loved and cared for.

The End

---  taglist in reblog

#dieter bravo x reader #dieter bravo #pedro pascal #my writing #the angst is back #pedro pascal fan fiction #pedro pascal character fanfiction

[addysfandomdump]

You're looking a little tangled up there, Bolt!

Decided to fill out the questionare that’s been going around the @sonic-oc-showdown​​!

Name: Bolt the Cyber Cheetah

Species: Asiatic Cheetah (and also cyborg)

Type: Speed

Alignment: Neutral Good

Home: Sol Empire

The rest under the cut! 👇

✨ - How did you come up with the OC’s name? 

I didn’t! Bolt originally belonged to my partner Zed! He was a recolor/edit of one of those Sonic character bases you find on DeviantArt lol. He originally had, and still has, electricity powers-- he’s also related to Blaze, and 5th grade Zed wanted a B name, hence Bolt! He also tends to “bolt” off a lot, haha.

I’m the one who made him a cheetah, though. Bolt used to be just a regular old cat. But then I thought “hm, y’know for a series about a fast hedgehog, there is the striking lack of the cheetah rival” so I made him a cheetah! An Asiatic cheetah specifically, since Blaze is Indian-coded! The Asiatic cheetah is dying out :( There are only 12 Asiatic cheetahs left in the whole world as of writing this :(( It’s so sad :(((

(A cheetah in Iran. Source: Wikipedia)

🌼 - How old are they? (Or approximate age range) 

Bolt is 18 years old!

🌺 - Do they have any love interest(s)?

Yes! Bolt has a girlfriend named Chilli, who’s a Chocolate Labrador! They met in junior year high school and are T4T ❤ Don’t ask him how he scored, he doesn’t know either.

🍕 - What is their favorite food?

I don’t know! Since he’s so anxious all the time, probably warm and filling foods, like soup! Since he’s 90% robot, though, he doesn’t really need to eat. He’s powered by his own electricity!

💼 - What do they do for a living?

Bolt does a variety of odd jobs to pay rent. He usually works as a living battery for a lot of people, though, restarting grids and charging people’s phones for a dollar.

🎹 - Do they have any hobbies?

Bolt has a lot of hobbies, usually ones that keep him calm. Visiting museums, going on long walks in nature, anything that handles weaving like crocheting or knitting or plush making... he made his jacket himself!

🎯 - What do they do best?

Worry. And cry.

🥊 - What do they love to do? What do they hate to do?

Bolt loves engaging in his hobbies and hanging out with his girlfriend, Chilli :)

Oh boy does he hate a lot of things. Many things stress him out. Watching a scary movie, trying something new, talking to people who aren’t his usual friend group, loud concerts, big crowds, whatever new adventure Blaze inadvertently drags him into this time, etc etc.

❤️ - What is one of your OC’s best memories?

Going to see the stars with his girlfriend for the first time.

✂️ - What is one of your OC’s worst memories?

Getting kidnapped and roboticized, easy. And [SPOILERS FOR THE UNDEVELOPED AND UNRELEASED FANGAME SONIC RUSH: LIGHTNING SPEED].

🧊 - Is their current design the first one?

Nope! Bolt went through sooo many designs. I’m still figuring him out. Every new drawing of him looks different. I feel like I’m getting close, though!

🍀 - What originally inspired the OC?

Zed wanted to make a cool elemental Sonic kitty ala Blaze. Then I basically took him and transformed him completely. At first he was gonna be another cocky Sonic rival, since I’ve always imagined a cheetah rival for Sonic, but then I was like “hmm, he has a lot of those already... not very unique...” and then I remembered @/thehydroxian-art-blog’s Jeff the Imperfect Shadow Android and though “Ah! I shall make him pathetic. And also a robot.” And thus the current version of Bolt was born!

🌂 - What genre do they belong in?

A sci-fi action comedy film, for sure!

💚 - What is your OC’s gender identity and sexuality?

Bolt is a trans man, he/him pronouns, bisexual. That yellow chestplate you see was originally a binder before it got welded into his body by the roboticization machine!

🙌 - How many siblings does your OC have?

None so far! He’s an only child! He does have his cousin, Blaze, though. Which technically makes him royalty. He doesn’t really live like royalty, though... or know that he’s royalty in the first place.

🍎 - What is the OC’s relationship w/their parents like?

They kinda just peaced out after Bolt graduated from high school. They weren’t particularly close with Bolt, and vice versa. They lowkey wanted nothing to do with him...

✏️ - How often do you draw/write about the OC?

A decent amount! A member in a Sonic server I’m in asks all sorts of prompt questions about other people’s OCs and I love answering them! It’s really helped me develop not just Bolt, but my other OCs such as Faye Moreau, Seafoam the Sailfish, Charlotte Webb, Chaos Clown, Ms. Host, Cabinet Man, and even Kryztal!

💎 - Do you ever see yourself killing off the OC?

Nah, not really.

💀 - Does your OC have any phobias?

Yes. Too many to list, though. He’s practically afraid of everything.

🍩 - Who is your OC’s arch-nemesis or rival?

Blaze is kiiinda his rival, but saying that is kind of a stretch. He’s an alright rival to Sonic when the hog visits, though.

🎓 - How long have you had the OC?

I don’t quite remember. A few months at least. Maybe even a year.

This one is something I came up with myself:

💥 - What are your OC’s powers, if they have any?

Bolt can channel and manipulate electricity! He can also shapeshift his mechanical body into various weapons like energy cannons, guns, and blades! His tail stretch out really far, and manifest temporary platforms!

Aaand that should do it! Hoo, that was a lot of questions! It was fun!!!

#sth #sonic oc #socs poll #bolt the cyber cheetah #art by me

[minorfamilysupremacy]

this post is largely for @therealblessedaffliction bc i can’t stop thinking about that scene on the balcony between gun and vegas, so:

when you rewatch that scene, it is so immediately apparent how deep the abuse goes, and how fucked up it is that gun is tasking his son with this mission. gun knows full well who porsche is and what kind of political points securing porsche’s loyalties/affections would net him. it’s possibly one of the most vile things he does, which is saying something considering everything else he does onscreen, because this isn’t using vegas as a way to secure a business deal or otherwise benefit the minor family in some way. this is all personal and a way to strike back at korn. 

the weird thing is that while pete is correct that gun beats vegas because he feels like he’s a disappointment and he needs to take out his own pain on his son, he’s not entirely correct. gun also beats vegas because he needs to strip vegas of his humanity. if he’s broken enough, he’s easier to control/manipulate into doing the family’s dirty business because he can be bought off with the idea of approval and praise. he can be warped into thinking his entire value to the family, and indeed as a person, is tied to what he can do or bring to the table. he is not valuable as a person; he is valuable as a weapon or attack dog. (’everyone just knows i’m vegas from the minor family’ is a hell of a line because no one sees vegas as a person. ‘vegas from the minor family’ is shorthand for a ruthless, violent specter who will kill without remorse. less of a person than an idea.)

gun would have started this early, back when vegas was small enough to be at his most malleable psychologically, because it would have been less work than trying to break a child old enough to have gotten a backbone or willpower. (how much influence his mom had on trying to avoid this, i’m not sure, because i don’t know how old vegas was when she died. we do know that gun has nothing but malice for her, though -- ‘you’re just as stupid as your mother’ -- and that line suggests that vegas was close to her. it’s very obviously chosen as a line gun knows will hurt vegas to the core.) he couldn’t be initiated into a lot of the very, very dirty work -- torture, contract killings, etc -- until he was a little older, but i have zero doubt he was witness to things very early just to desensitize him and make sure he had no illusions about his future. immersing him in all of this would have been only a practical decision (writing those words made my skin crawl), but also would have been a great abuse tool because it would have isolated vegas from his peers. by virtue of being a theerapanyakul, he already would have had a certain degree of isolation, but then making sure he doesn’t ever breathe a word of his horrific home life to the kids around him? yeah, that’s a breeding ground for an angry, lonely kid who will never learn to form connections. maybe he had a close relationship with his cousins, but maybe not! it’s impossible to tell from what we’re given. (what we know: 1) as adults, they fucking hate each other; 2) korn and gun have a vested interest in sowing discord between the families to keep up the competitive edge. to me, any potential childhood closeness would have been snuffed out as the kids got older when they needed to be more fully slotted into their future roles.)

so from a very young age, vegas would have been taught to distrust, judge, and keep his distance from others. human kindness, frailty, weakness -- those aren’t things he would be allowed to indulge in. he would have had to crush out whatever emotions weren’t practical for survival.

the dehumanization is already underway. strip a little kid of the safety and support they need to grow and thrive and you’re giving them an unstable sense of self and damaging their ability to self-soothe because they don’t learn that skill without guidance. constantly being in danger of abuse is going to keep vegas in constant fight-or-flight mode. he would live only for the recognition and praise of others, because he had nothing of his own to fall back on. gun’s approval, or lack thereof, would shape how he viewed himself as a person.

any kid is going to grow up inherently and instinctively craving love and affection. it’s just how humans are wired. if they aren’t receiving it, though, that’s where they can branch out into any of a hundred different maladaptive coping mechanisms. in vegas’ case, he was given the tool of violence and a half-formed hope of approval. and a lot of abuse victims become violent not only bc they’re mirroring their abuser’s actions (which, obviously, vegas does do), but also because violence is control and it gives them the illusion they’ve asserted some power over their lives. he did not choose to become violent in a vacuum; gun systematically dismantled him as a person and then, in a sick fucking gesture of ‘assistance,’ gave him a path forward by making him a killing machine. and best of all, vegas can’t even see himself as human, so seeing the humanity in others is almost an impossibility. he’s perfect for what gun needs him to be, not that gun would let him know that because it would undo all the work he put into molding vegas for his own ends.

everything vegas knows of human nature and humanity is based on observation, but what he’s observed (and been a victim of) is how to break people. how to spot and exploit weaknesses. he knows how to wheel and deal, he knows how to get people to talk, he knows how to unravel someone and bring them to their knees. he knows how to see people the way other people see him -- zeroing in on what’s valuable about them, like information or influence, and discarding the rest. (look at the infamous ‘head, chest, or heart’ scene from episode 14. porsche and vegas have shared a quasi-friendship at various points throughout the series, but when it comes to this moment, porsche isn’t a person, he’s an easy way to hurt kinn.)

and part of the reason vegas is good at this is not just because he’s violent. yeah, a lot of guys are gonna talk if you rip out their cochlea. but that doesn’t always work! the torture briefcase is not made for the boardroom. you need a lighter, defter touch for that. you need diplomacy.

or, if you’re a theerapanyakul, you just need a vulnerable teenage boy you’re comfortable sacrificing. 

how often did gun pimp vegas out? the novel might say, who knows. i have a feeling it was a lot. for all we know, it’s still happening up until gun’s death. but what better way to show off your broken vanity project than to serve him up to god-knows-how-many powerful men in bangkok and, frankly, probably in plenty of other places as well. vegas is a beautiful man; he would have been a beautiful kid, with that delicate bone structure and that bottomless desire to please. and when he’s, what, 14, 15, 16 (again, vomiting while i write it), he’s a wonderful target for powerful men who want to feel young and in control. if he fights it, it’s more satisfying to break him; if he gives in, he can be easily reshaped into what they best desire. and gun condoned it. korn condoned it. (and if tensions hadn’t already broken the main and minor cousins apart, this would sure do it.) it gets them results; it provides an easy source of blackmail if someone tries to get out of line.

and best of all, it reinforces everything gun has been telling vegas his entire life! it continues to tie his value to what he can do and not who he is, it isolates him, it dehumanizes him and strips him of agency, and it provides more evidence to support a bleak, nihilistic outlook. gun’s outsourcing the abuse to supplement what he’s dishing out. and korn’s condoning it deepens the rift between the two families, thus ensuring that the rivalry won’t sputter out any time soon. (he pours so much poison into the ears of his family and associates, too. pete saying korn isn’t cruel isn’t intentionally malicious by any stretch, but he could have dealt less damage by directly stabbing vegas in the heart. ‘isn’t my fucking life because of this?’ isn’t just about being in hiding; it’s about how within the confines of the theerapanyakul family, he’s always been the most convenient scapegoat for their worst offenses.)

BUT. but! vegas is incredibly resilient. he weathers, quite frankly, an unimaginable amount of shit through his life and yet, as we see in the safehouse, he has kept that terrified, lonely inner child safe all these years. it’s battered and fragile, but still reacts to pete’s gentle -- and perhaps unintentional? -- coaxing. this is different from the side of himself he shows to macau, because with macau, he has to be a caretaker and protector. obviously, with pete, he still engages in caretaker behaviors, but he has an admittedly VERY warped perception of them as more of emotional equals. (it, of course, takes pete losing his shit at vegas for vegas to realize how many of the dehumanizing behaviors he’s been subjected to are now being passed to pete. it genuinely doesn’t occur to him until pete is sobbing and bleeding profusely how hurtful his actions are because he’s normalized them so fucking much over the years. he had no choice, of course, but say it with me AGAIN: intent does not negate impact.)

both actions -- pete’s bringing vegas’ humanity to light, and vegas’ realization of how hurtful denying pete’s humanity is -- come back to one very simple point: gun lost. even before he ended up dead in the main house, he’d failed at one of his life’s most crucial missions, which was to make his son the perfect weapon to destroy the main family. he spent vegas’ entire life abusing him on every conceivable level, only to have someone come into vegas’ life and realize that not every piece of him had been irreparably broken. the delicious irony is that gun trained vegas to build wall after wall and shut out person after person, but in the end, it was those same walls that allowed vegas to keep his truest, most honest self safe. gun wanted to make his son a weapon of war, and he did. he just forgot that a shield can be a weapon, too.

#thinking about pete so carefully dismantling each layer of armor to let a little bit more of that inner light shine #it's a lifetime's work but they're gonna do it together <3 #anyway fuck gun all my homies hate gun #i repeat: i'm glad he's fuckin dead!!!!!! #vegas at the family altar: I LIVED BITCH #(furry convention video voice) any win against gun theerapanyakul is a win to defeat homophobia #vegas theerapanyakul #kinnporsche #tw: csa

[thats-it-im-fallingdown]

So I’ve finally finished season 4 of Clone Wars! Since the episode order is mostly lining up with the chronology, I can put my thoughts down into something resembling organized.

Mon Cala arc

-can that prince please not pronounce his own homeworld’s name like that? he calls it moan cala and i hate it

-it wasn’t necessary for the plot to work, but I’m curious about the history between the cala and the quarren. i wish we got some more details on why relations are tense

-the animators were clearly out of their depth (ha) with the setting. some parts felt like they didn’t know how to translate the usual fighting to an aquatic setting

-the story was satisfying, but I doubt this is anyone’s favorite set of episodes

-i can feel the gungans growing on me. not sure how I feel about that

Shadow Warrior

-how dare this show make gungans tolerable. coming into my home and making me okay with jar jar fucking binks

R2 and C3P0 duology

-some fun moments!

-would show it to my young cousins but at my age, it goes on a little too long. I’m not looking for/expecting deep meditations on war (American War by Omar el Akkad if that’s what you are interested in), but this is more in the kids show category than the family show one most episodes fall under

Umbara arc

-this is what I mean by being a family show vs a kids show

-I love this arc

-and Rex really gets fleshed out as a character in this one

-i didn’t get why people hated krell so much. i get it now. he’s like the umbridge of Star wars

-the tech designs for umbara and umbaran tech are pretty slick, i hope they get a cameo in live action some day

-the krell twist was. okay ig? it comes out of nowhere a bit. sure, he’s very strict on protocol and has a bone to pick with clones, but it’s said explicitly, more than once, that he gets results as a commander (paid for in casualties, but still successful). him being a relentless opportunist gets away from the clone thing, and i think digging into that could have been really interesting

Zygerrian Slave Empire

-hm

-not fond of the orientalist imagery in this one. won’t elaborate. i’ll say it’s personal for me and leave it at that

-how Anakin’s history as someone who was once literally enslaved should have been explored more

-this arc has its redeeming moments, but it also has a lot of wasted potential

-I might make a more in depth post someday, I have a lot of half formed thoughts about this one

Friend in Need

-this was a rewatch for me, I saw it when I was getting Mandalorian context for the Grogu and his working single father show

-I notice now that except for Bo Katan, deathwatch is all male. and to me, were implied to be sexually abusing the local women (the village leader mentions them having “taken” their women) maybe that’s what was meant by that infamous “they all died off years ago” re: exile of the warriors. no women, no offspring.

Crisis on Naboo arc

-ooh, I wish we get some more time on how Anakin was affected by Obi Wans faked death

-man, cad bane looks stupid without his hat. cover up that dome baby boy, you aren’t ventress, you cant pull the bald look off

-cad bane saving kenobi/hardeen in the Box. he’s a bad guy all right, but he isn’t entirely without honor. love that trope

-and I love palpatine’s scheming! glad to see a senior citizen staying active and involved

Ventress/Savage Oppress/Maul arc

-i love Assaj Ventress so much it’s unreal

-idc that the nightsisters are on the dark side. i love sisterhoods, i love witches, i love covens, it broke my heat to watch the separatists massacre them. at least mother talzin is still alive.

-i have so much Feeling for ventress. betrayed and abandoned again and again only to lose her sisters, and to feel like it’s her fault

-saving that girl from a forced marriage… ventress I love you.

-they should have let maul keep the spider legs, they looked cool

-I didn’t get the obsession with maul. I don’t really share it, but I do get it now. the raw drive for vengeance, his madness. I’m looking forward to where the writers take him

-obi wan and ventress are a great combo, their dialogue has a lot of chemistry

#star wars #text #star wars clone wars #ahsoka tano #death watch #mandalorian #anakin skywalker #obi wan kenobi #assaj ventress #darth maul #savage oppress #rako hardeen #cad bane #sheev palpatine #captain rex #umbara arc #jar jar binks #Naboo #long post #pong krell #my posts

[autismguy55]

hello! i was wondering if you have any headcanons about the lotf boys before they crashed on the island? like their home life and other stuff.

i hope this question doesn't bother you! your art is amazing btw :)

it doesn’t bother me at all!!! i love talking about this book! :) my thoughts aren’t all together on it so this may be a little jumbled up but. yea :) gonna put this under the cut bc it’ll get long. also this is all just headcanon!

ralph - his mom died when he was young and his dad was in the navy, so he was in the custody of nannies and babysitters most of the time. legally, his guardian is his older brother (~10 years older) but his brother works a lot and generally does his own thing so ralph doesn’t see him often. ralph spent most of his time bored inside and is very well-read because of this, though he isn’t very good at wording his thoughts. his favorite book is the coral island (in the original manuscript he talked about it constantly - lol). we know he had ponies because of some flashbacks in the book, so he’s pretty good at horseback riding and generally enjoys the company of animals.

jack - catholicsaywhat? extremely religious. he could recite the bible backwards in his sleep. he prays his rosary until it leaves indents in his hands. he had a similar childhood to ralph with absent parents but it turned him into a bitter, bitter little thing. let’s face it he’s a teacher’s pet who bullies everyone when the teacher’s back is turned. i think he spent his formative years in dusty old libraries and sitting to get his portrait painted. he has a lot of pent up rage and violence in his heart. ummm… he’s a countertenor and actually a pretty good singer for his age. he likes to hit whistle notes and piss everyone off. i think he’s less one of those bullies who beats people up and more one of those kids who just makes you feel like shit thru words. also i think he’s tall as fuck lol giraffe headass

piggy - we know he’s an orphan and his aunt took care of him - i think we know the most about piggy’s backstory than any other boy in the book. he probably has a lot of cousins (his aunt’s kids) and has to share most of his stuff. he’s very smart, obviously, but he’s poor so he doesn’t go to a good school and relies a lot on the public library. i think he’d have pets. he seems like the kind of guy to have like, a hermit crab or a lizard or fish or something. he’s generally nice to people. definitely an atheist but his aunt makes him come to church every sunday. he has one teacher who he loves and looks forward to that class every single day. pretty cool guy i don’t have anything against him.

simon - coal mines for you gayboy. jokes aside he has a lot of younger siblings and doesn’t mind taking care of little kids. definitely into photography and painting! he often goes on “wanders” and doesn’t come back until it’s 10pm and he’s covered in sticks and leaves and carrying some random woodland creature (“i made a friend!”). he’s epileptic and undiagnosed because it’s the 50s. got sick a lot when he was younger because he spent so much time outside, but his immune system has hardened up since then. he likes to read books but only so he can do character analysis. would also probably write. doesn’t have a lot of friends but he’s generally well liked at school and adults in town love him because he’s so polite. yeha.

that’s about it off the top of my head but yeaa… if u want to know more for a specific character lmk

#lord of the flies #lotf #ask #august speaks

[obesericewrites]

a 🍪 for a response

How would Dawn feel like of she got called "my baby, sweetheart,... by the MC?

considering you enjoyed my Shian request, I shall ask for baby content here as well

I did greatly enjoy the Shian ask!! All the gremlins thank you for baby content.

This situation we would assume that the MC is in an aunt/uncle/cousin relationship with Dawn. It could also happen when romancing M, the former would be more neutral to this ask!

She’s confused when the MC calls her ‘my baby’ to a merchant in the town square. The MCs tone was so confident and the merchant looked so excited when they had gestured down at her.

She felt…shy. She had hid behind your leg, peering up at the beaming merchant.

As the MC and Dawn walk away from the merchant. Her eyebrows pulled together and lips pressed into a thin line, her mind would race. Why did you call her that? She knows what the word baby means.

She figures it means infant or child. Those around the village have recently begun to call her that teasingly. As to make fun of her age. But the MC didn’t seem to be joking when they called her ‘baby’.

No, the MC had claimed her by calling her their baby. But…why?

“Mc?”

“Yes, sweetheart?”

“Why did you call me your baby?” She asks the MC, who lets out an airy laugh and ruffles the top of her head a bit. Dawn yelps and fixes her hair quickly while scowling up at the MC. Her face softened when she saw a warm expression on your face. Making her confusion grow.

“Because you are my baby.” They grin, lightly tapping her nose. She squints up at them, “but we are not blood? I don’t understand.” The MCs face seemed to crumble a bit as the warm expression turned into an almost sad one. Dawn lets them take her hands as they take a knee in front of her. Smiling a bit as they did so.

“It doesn’t matter if we aren’t blood, honey. I love you like you’re my own and that’s all that matters.”

Oh.

Oh. Now she understands.

They love her like she is their own daughter.

Her chin wobbles and her eyes cloud up a bit. She sees the MC's face fall for a quick moment before she throws herself into their arms. Wrapping her arms tightly around their neck as she sobs into them. “Oh sweetheart, it’s okay. I’ve got you, it’s okay.”

Dawn felt so much. She felt happy and excited. Only her parent had ever openly cared about her like this and having someone, especially the MC care for her like this; like a daughter. She hides her face in the MCs neck. Who scopes her up, using their arm to support her while the other ran up and down her back.

As the MC carried her back to what she assumed was their shop, she thinks.

What should she call the MC now? Should she call them something different? What would her parent think if she called the MC something else? Would they feel bad if she did?

She decides most of those questions should be stored away while the rest she should just ask now. As she makes that realization, MC enters their shop. She leans back a bit with a determined expression on her face as the MC looks at her.

“Should I call you something different?”

“What do you mean..?”

“Should I call you my parent since you called me your baby?”

“….. let's talk to M first. Just in case, okay?”

“M’kay…can we get some sweets?”

“Of course, sweetheart. Whatever you want.”

#dawn ask #the writing style for this is DEFINITELY inspired by fell star if #BC THEY DID SUCH A GOOD JOB 😫💜

[yellowhollyhock]

The different family cultures of each iteration of turtles, using the example of how conflict is navigated

In 1987 when one of them is upset they will first have some type of small verbal outburst and then close themselves in their room. Then Master Splinter will say something like, “I believe this was very serious to him. You may have hurt his feelings.” Which is a very soft reprimand and also pretty redundant because this is a script they’re all familiar with. The offended turtle made an angry defensive statement and then shut the door. They all know this song and dance. But Master Splinter’s prompt is part of it because they all like routine (look at every single character with their “as Michelangelo would say, Cowabunga,” sometimes with Michelangelo standing right there, they love each other’s voices they love echoing each other they love predictability and familiarity). It’s like when I prompt my third graders to say sorry or excuse me or thank you; they know it’s coming, and when I’m not listening they do it on their own, but if they know I’m there they like to wait for prompt because it’s been established as a routine to help them learn social norms and it’s comforting to remember they can still have help (just have to be careful not to give too much help and end up making them feel judged and nagged) (am I saying that this happens with Splinter? Well I’m not not saying it). Anyway this is fitting and heartwarming because the 87 turtles mutated from toddlers into teens. They never got to be third graders and their family culture has developed in a way that allows them their dignity while also giving them as much structure and guidance and forgiving safety net as possible.

In 2012 when feelings get hurt it’s all very out in the open. Donnie insults Mikey’s intelligence? Mikey tackles him from behind. Leo is annoyed with Raph? Open criticism none secret. Donnie doesn’t like Leo pressuring him? He’s gonna scream about it might even throw something. And in the flip side, there’s Raph lifting Leo into a hug to show his gratitude for being accepted. There’s Donnie beaming at Mikey when he beats the electrocution game telling him how awesome he is. They’re very open with their feelings, like extremely so very open. Visiting their house would be just sensory overload. Like we all had those cousins right? There’s always peanut butter on the wall and screaming in the other room and the toilet seat is left up. It’s warm and comfortable but also really chaotic and almost disturbing. That’s the 2012 turtles. And this also makes a lot of sense considering they were the most completely isolated for fifteen years.

The 2003 turtles are very sensitive. Idk how else to phrase it. They’re very in tune with each other, and just like with the 2012 turtles this means they’re there for each other, and also that they hurt each other. But quite unlike 2012, they’re very… not reserved exactly. Not formal, either. There’s a lot of warmth but it’s very quiet. If 03 visited 12 (especially Donnie because I think that’s the starkest difference) they’d be shocked. It would feel rude to them. They definitely get angry but they’re very gentle with each other. They can hear the emotions loud and clear, but to someone who isn’t familiar with them the way they are with each other it can look like they aren’t communicating at all. They act the most their age when they’re only with each other, and much more grownup when outsiders are around (seeing them relax around April and Casey gets to me every time). This tracks because Master Splinter has never been human and started out with no idea how mutation would work. He needed them to grow up fast, superficially if necessary, because he didn’t know how long he’d be able to take care of them. And once that’s done you can’t just undo it.

With Rise when someone’s mad there’s a lot of yelling and name-calling. Donnie uses dum-dum, Raph and Leo both use jerk. Mikey purposely bottles it all up so he can be Dr Delicate Touch, which is terrifying honestly. If the name-calling cuts too deep or an issue is more serious to one guy than the other guys, they’re all about big elaborate gestures. Lots of big gestures for expressing positive emotions, too. When Donnie’s robot hurts his brothers feelings they reprogram him to bully his creator (they obviously didn’t mean for it to be as dangerous as it was but even so their plan was quite. Excessive). When they accidentally flush Piebald they end up dealing with an entire revenge plot from her and Master Splinter himself. They have a big old snowball fight over which Jupiter Jim movie they like best. Whether they’re expressing hurt or just saying I love you, it’s all about ✨ pizazz ✨. Which. You know. They were raised by Lou Jitsu who is all about pizazz, but not only that, they had to use big gestures to get his attention.

It’s interesting to think about how these differences would affect how they are with each other. 1987’s rituals would throw off most of the other turtles, I think the rise boys would love it though. 2003 turtles are positively chaotic but in a multiversal group they’d never get blamed for stuff because they seem polite.

#tmnt #tmnt 2003 #tmnt 1987 #tmnt 2012 #rottmnt #obviously there are a lot more but I have to stop somewhere

[jennyboom21]

Which one of y’all wrote this?!?

It’s exquisite!

But I’m here for one reason and one reason alone.

Dianna Agron.

You probably know Dianna Agron from “Glee,” or “Shiva Baby,” or being an incredibly hot Jew recently interviewed by Hey Alma. I’ve been a fan of hers since “Glee,” since I watched her sing and dance in a revealing cheerleading uniform. There aren’t many things you can pinpoint with accuracy in your life, but I’m pretty sure I can say this with full confidence: Dianna Agron made me gay.

The crowd is mixed. There are a few groups of young women, one very fashionable young guy. They all have a queer air about them, and I know I’m not just projecting: I can hear their conversations and they are gay.

At first I think most people in attendance tonight will be Gleeks, at least the young ones. I mean, why else would you pay to see Dianna Agron sing at a fancy hotel? That shit’s expensive. Later that night, when I told my friend’s mum I saw jazz at the Carlyle, she told me I got a “real New York experience.” Young people can’t afford that! Unless you’re a dedicated Gleek.

Growing up in 2009 was confusing. I was 14, and being 14 sucked. When “Glee” came along, it was funny and edgy and it was gay. So gay. I say now, only partly as a joke, that “Glee” made me gay. Not in a malicious, gay-agenda kind of way, but more in a “this is the first time I see gay people on screen and now I realize they exist” kind of way. Quinn Fabray, Agron’s character, was my favorite. And that shit was confusing. Quinn was a devout Christian, blonde and blue-eyed and villainous yet infinitely likable. I was drawn to Agron, and her character, in a way I didn’t fully understand yet. Why was I obsessed with this gorgeous, impeccable woman? Why did looking at her make my stomach flutter? I followed Agron from project to project, watching literally anything and everything she appeared in. And that includes an ad for a Nintendo 3DS. I was obsessed. And unknowingly, I was very gay.

Dianna Agron is late, by almost 15 minutes.

I’ve got nothing to do but scan the room. I’m not sure why older people are here. The folks next to me are middle-aged and seemingly heterosexual. There are elderly people at the bar across from me. There are finance guys with their done-up girlfriends. Middle-aged couples with their 20-something daughters. Queers. Me. A woman reading the Wall Street Journal. A regular swapping family updates with the bartender.

This is the power of Dianna. She brings us together.

Dinner and a show at the Carlyle seems like it exists in a different era, like I’ve stepped into a portal and come out into 19-dickety-2. Dianna has that vibe, too. That old school charm, the timelessness to her features. Like you could find her likeness in a Buzzfeed article titled “25 Pictures of Bona Fide Ellis Island Hotties.” She wouldn’t look out of place in furs and a fancy cigarette holder. I realize I’ve just described Cruella de Ville. I guess that’s my epitome of old school fancy. I try to lean in.

I order a gin and tonic and it is mostly gin. I’ve barely eaten all day and my head is starting to spin. It’s either the alcohol or my body can sense that Dianna is near.

Finding out celebrities are Jewish is always weirdly exciting. Finding out Dianna Agron is Jewish when I was 14 was like finding out Santa is real and also he’s your distant cousin. Sure, there was absolutely no reason for our paths to ever cross; the chances of successful-actress-who-lives-in-L.A. Dianna Agron meeting me, a kid from Australia who attended an all girls’ Chabad school, were literally zero. But when I realized we were both Jewish, anything felt possible: a Shabbat meal we miraculously both attend, a performance of “Fiddler” on Broadway where we happen to sit next to one another. The Jewish world is impossibly small, and by some strange twist of fate, we are both in it.

It never happens, of course. No Shabbat, no random meet-cute. The closest I get is my friend meeting her in a cafe in Jerusalem a few years ago. I think it’s for the best. Imagine getting close enough to Dianna Agron that you could talk to her; I don’t think I’d be able to cope.

I come within mere inches of Dianna Agron.

She enters the room and stands right next to me, waiting for her musical cue. Her band has already taken the stage (her violinist and cellist are HOT. Like, hot hot). Wall Street Journal Lady is watching the stage, asks me if she’s obstructing my view of the band. She literally does not realize Dianna Agron is standing right next to us. Literally, right next to us. Like I could reach out and tap her on the shoulder and ask if she comes here often.

Thank God I’m wearing a mask, I decide, as Dianna takes to the stage and starts to sing. Otherwise everyone would be able to see this dumb fucking smile that stays on my face for the rest of the night.

I’m going to be honest with you, I don’t listen to a lot of jazz. Up until this night, my favorite jazz is H. Jon Benjamin’s comedy album. But now I love jazz. Jazz is the best. It suits Dianna’s voice so perfectly. I think it’s absolutely criminal that all those years on “Glee” and she didn’t sing any jazz. She sang a funk song, but no jazz. She sang showtunes, but no jazz.

A crime. A crime against humanity and Dianna Agron stans.

Her voice has a sultry quality, and that is the first time I’ve ever used that word. She hits low notes in a way that hits me straight in the chest. She scrunches her nose as she smiles in a way that I recognize from online performances I’ve obviously watched before.

When your personality is formed by pop culture, seeing a celebrity almost feels like seeing an old friend. I know, logically, this isn’t true; Dianna Agron does not know me, and I do not know her. But I know a version of her, the version she puts on in interviews. When she laughs throughout the show, I know that laugh. I’ve seen the smile she throws at the audience dozens of times before. This is what this is, at its core, I decide. Old friends. A whole room of them, watching their queen bee.

Dianna doesn’t look like a lot of the Jews I know. It’s something the Jewish media loves to talk about, somewhat saltily. Dianna Agron, always the non-Jewish bridesmaid and never the bride under the chuppah. Obviously, I first knew her as Quinn Fabray, noted Christian, who bullies Jewish Rachel Berry with a merciless quality some may describe as “small-town antisemitism.” More recently, Agron’s character in “Shiva Baby” is the only non-Jewish character in the whole movie. There’s also that time she played a nun in one of the greatest (and gayest) nun films of all time, “Novitiate”. And who could forget when she played famous Mormon Brandon Flowers’ girlsona in the “Just Another Girl” music video? OK. I’ll stop showing off my impressive Dianna Agron knowledge now.

I’ve spent a lot of time in my life considering what it means to look like a Jew. As a woman, I never had to grow peyos, or wear a kippah and tzitzit like the boys did. My dad would cover his kippah with a baseball cap if we wandered too far from home, and my brother quickly learned to do the same. For a long time, the only way I felt identifiably Jewish was by the knee-length skirts that screamed “Modern Orthodox.” But I stopped wearing skirts years ago. The Chabad boys handing out Shabbat candles in New York only offered me some because I stopped to ask them for directions.

In the Carlyle, there’s nothing that demarcates me as “Jew.” I could, for all intents and purposes, choose to play the role of “non-Jew” for this evening’s performance. But I say a bracha (blessing) before I sip my drink. I read a d’var torah while I wait for the show to begin. And I think, somewhat simply, that actors are not the roles they inhabit.

A waiter brings a cake with a candle into the crowd, and Dianna wishes the recipient a happy birthday. Her crowd work throughout is amazing. She laughs and smirks. I remember I am gay, very gay. At one point she turns her back to the audience and throws us a look over her shoulder. My automatic internal response is “step on me.” At another moment, she tells the audience that she and the band “like applause,” and my internal voice says, “OK, Rachel Berry.” She sings “Our Day Will Come,” which was performed on season six of “Glee,” an episode that she didn’t even appear in. Still, my hand flies to my chest as I hear echoes of the “Glee” version, echoes of Naya Rivera and Darren Criss (the latter who, incidentally, I met after the show. Wild).

I wonder how hard it must be to divorce herself from “Glee,” and from the type of fandom and fans it has spawned. When you have something as big, as iconic and divisive and culturally groundbreaking, attached to your name, it must be hard to feel as though you’re maturing as a performer. Do you expect your fans to mature along with you? Do you expect to pick up more on the way?

There’s no doubt in my mind that Dianna is picking up fans tonight. WSJ Lady is all in, as are the other bar regulars. Who better to spread the gospel of Dianna than Dianna herself?

Her pianist is Jewish, it turns out, and so is her drummer. She doesn’t, like, announce it or anything, but their names are Eden and Itai, so I kind of figure it out, you know?

She tells us she found her drummer on Instagram, scrolling casually.

And yet here I remain — with several mutuals, I might add — unfollowed, Ms. Agron. What’s up with that?

My notes get fewer and farther between from this point on. I’m a few drinks in, the room is too dark and I’m too mesmerized by what’s happening on stage. But here are some important things to know:

she sang in French

her mom cried and she called her out for it

she made a playlist of the songs she performed on Spotify because of course she did

she sang an Eartha Kitt song after the audience demanded two encores

she is wonderful.

Two things happen concurrently. I steal a pen from the hotel bar, and Dianna starts to sing “Moon River.” Without sounding like a crazed stalker, for a single moment in time, she’s singing to me. It might sound pathetic, it might sound insane, but here’s the truth of the matter:

In that moment, I am 16 again. I barely know anything about myself — I’m years away from coming out, and it’s something I’ve chosen to compartmentalize and never think about. I don’t know who I am, I just know who I don’t want to be. But through it all, there’s this person who has a Tumblr she posts on regularly, and she’s on my favorite TV show every week, and she’s pretty in a way that feels normal and Not Gay to obsess over.

Dianna sings “Moon River.” In that moment, as the last bars of the song play, I hold onto 16 as hard as I can.

Here’s the crux of the whole night. I know, when she exits the stage, she has to pass me again. I know. I deliberate all night whether to say, “Thank you, Ms. Agron,” like an absolute fool or stay quiet or what.

Obviously I go with the fool route. She rushes past me. I say thank you, not unlike a kindergartener being forced to thank their parents’ friend for something. She laughs. She says thank you to me.

There you have it. Mission accomplished. I have spoken to Dianna Agron one time.

Am I a changed person? Obviously not. I am who I was at the start of the night, just significantly drunker and with a new pen.

The WSJ lady asks me how I enjoyed it, and I tell her very much so. She also loved it. I ask her if she can airdrop me the videos she took throughout the night (even though we were told not to video!!!) and she says, “Of course!” so now I have the videos on my phone. I sent them to my friend who loves “Glee” just as much, if not more, than I do. But I don’t watch them. Why would I watch them when I experienced the magic first hand?

The Kotzker Rebbe once said that silence is the most beautiful of all sounds.

Clearly he never went to a Dianna Agron jazz show.

Author’s twitter

#Dianna Agron x cafe Carlyle #jewish women actors

[itsdelicate]

omg i remember u mentioning getting a new tat and wanted to ask what u wanted to get but completely forgot dkjfns. so what did you get?

yes it isss!! it took me forever to properly get into music like the only reason i ever started liking specific artists was quarantine lmao. that is so wow omg. so like fearless era? that mustve been fun tho!! honestly i would love to spend half my life a swiftie lol. i was i was!! like omg the bad blood mv is prob one of the biggest "omg girls?!!?!??!!?" moments of my life like that scene w her velcroing on the boxing glove w her teeth,,, the hair, the makeup, just everything. i still scream a little when i see that scene lmao. and also like ybwm, love story, ikywt, blank space (another mv i was obsessed w), etc etc. the popular ones!! and my vocal teacher actually introduced me to cruel summer (which i loved) and also her cover of riptide. like now thinking ab it,,, how did he even know omg??? SO TRUE like inject ivy into my veins its so *chefs kiss*. YES YES YES mad woman is so scream in the car or into a pillow while crying i love her sm. LMAO YES i remember seeing it and genuinely thinking. huh. a happy song cool! and then its just pain for 5 mins which i absolutely LOVE.

AWWW THEYRE SO SWEET I CANT JKMDWMV i would cry if any of them did that to me. so valid so true shes just so !!!??!??!??!?!?!?

yessssssss. rapunzel is such an icon <3 she so issss!!!! OMG I LOVE MAMMA MIA SM!!!!! abba is obvs everything and meryl streep???!?!?!!!! AND amanda seyfried AND julie walters AND christine baranski???!!?!!!? AND colin firth and pierce brosnan?!?!?!?! its such a classic and i could watch it forever jkdmsfvjnm. yes omg i immediately stop the second i feel a bit annoyed w it. okok i def will!!

it is it is njskodjn. haha yea ik a lot of ppl dont really like it lmao but the second i heard it was obsessed. RIGHT??? makes me cry everytime. im very much a sad songs lover <3

yea me too!! like to go to a mall and seeing the massive tree and all the decorations?? so pretty so fun i love it.

glad i could be of service lol ajnsmf <3 yes it did thanks!! my friends and i are planning on watching the black panther movie together so that hopefully!! have u watched it? and wbu do u have any plans? also i realise that i totally spam u in these replies iwdkfvs im so sorry i talk and ramble a lot lmao

xxx ur secret santa

very rude of tumblr not to tell me i got your ask 😒 anyway! it’s a little mermaid rat!! it has the prettiest colours in it’s tail and the design was to raise funds for the mermaids charity who support trans, non-binary and gender diverse kids and families <33333

oooh gotcha i totally get it a lot of my friends aren’t into music like at all but i’m so glad you found a love for taylor’s music hehe yess fearless era!! but you’re here now!! you can be an honorary since-fearless-era stan 😌 love that for you omg the scene you’re talking about it,,, Yes whew on this topic i didn’t know it then but the story of us mv was a gay awakening for me ahdjfj and yes the blank space mv was SO good!! (is it your fav music video?) i will never not be upset that cruel summer didn’t become a single IT WAS RIGHT THERE!!! omgggg stop her cover of riptide is my fav thing ever i listened to it obsessively for ages your vocal teacher knew what he was doing 😌 help i didn’t even process that it’s over 5 mins long it’s so 🥲

EXACTLY EXACTLY!!! i had like post concert (convention 🤔) depression for days after lmao

YESSS it’s such a classic and so feel good i love it so so much!! my cousin introduced me to all the abba songs when i was like 7 and she burned them onto a cd for me under the instructions that id stop singing mamma mia at all hours cause i was annoying her 💀 and then i proceeded to audition with mamma mia the song for my school’s talent show and all the teacher’s laughed cause i was literally 8 years old singing about how i’d been cheated on and i was brokenhearted 😭 shfkgk i have to do that when i overplay taylor’s songs sometimes like ok i have to listen to another album now or i’ll burn myself out smh

it had such a different sound! but i love it now and omg i always find myself avoiding really sad songs 🤧

yeah!! it’s such a lovely time and i adore going to christmas markets <3

omg nice! no i haven’t ahdjf i actually haven’t seen mcu movies 🫣 i never got into them and my friend’s a huge fan who keeps asking to me watch them but it feels like there’s too much to get into now from the beginning shdjf and no omg i love it!! spam away 😌

i hope you’re having a good week!! 🥰

#ask #anonymous #santaswiftie

[irkimatsu]

problematic trope!: incest, possessiveness, snuff

Oh boy! *rubs filthy hands together* Three in one! This is gonna be fun!

Gonna put a read more cut. What this is about is already written on the tin, guys. Don't click it if you don't want it! I won't go too in-depth, but still!

Incest

1. Any of my ships that fit it: Ichi/Jyushi is the big one here. I do have some other BLMatsu ships - Oso/Choro is in a firm second place - but Ichi/Jyushi have my heart in a delightful death grip. Falling in love with this ship lost me some friends. Worth it.

2. General Opinion: I don't think incest is in itself a kink of mine in the sense that it can be the only reason I ship something, but if I already like the dynamic, making it incest can add some extra spice. I already loved Ichi and Jyushi's close friendship and the way they complement each other, for example; I'd ship them even if they weren't brothers. But they are, so there's that extra taboo to work around, with how their brothers react and the guilt they deal with. (Though in some scenarios their brothers are just as disgusting as they are, so it's fine.)

Also worth noting that I'm much more interested in same-generation incest, like siblings and cousins, or maybe stuff like aunts and uncles with nieces and nephew if the gap isn't too wide. If the age gap is too wide, no thanks. I'd say about... ten or so years is my limit? I haven't watched much R&M but fanart of the ship gives me the squigs, sorry

3. Any ships that aren’t canon it But I’d read w/ the trope: Does Ichimi/Jyushi-senpai count as a separate ship? They're not related in their AU, but the idea of Ichimi as a scary little sister who wants to keep her niisan all to herself by any means necessary is pretty tasty.

Possessiveness

1. Any of my ships that fit it: Ichimi/Jyushi-senpai is the one that's possessive in canon. Ichimi set her rivals on fire and went after Jyushi-senpai with a chainsaw. She's a little needy. I love her for that

2. General Opinion: I really like possessiveness in ships that are obviously written to be dumpster fires. For it to hit right for me, the receiving party has to not like it, or at least have reservations that they can temporarily move past. In that sense, it's a delicious horror ship. I only like the receiving party seeing nothing wrong with this if it's setting up for them to deeply regret it later. Less Twilight, more yandere, is my point on this one.

3. Any ships that aren’t canon it But I’d read w/ the trope: It's not strictly canon, but widespread fanon - possessive niisans in BLMatsu ships are delicious. In particular, with my two big BLMatsu ships, Oso and Ichi respectively are terrified of change, of growing up, and of anything taking away their best friend in the world. They will do anything to keep their precious little brother with them... I think Oso's possessiveness would only escalate to stuff like sabotaging Choro's attempts to improve and being a pouty pissbaby when Choro wants a life outside of him (that second one is canon), while Ichi would go a little further, with creepy possessive talk that borders on emotional abuse. Jyushi would never, ever leave him, right? If Jyushi left, Ichi doesn't know what he'd do... he might even kill himself... if seriously pushed, he may even need to take Jyushi with him...

Jyushi really being in love with Homura, but staying with Ichi just because he doesn't want Ichi hurting himself... intriguing...

Snuff

1. Any of my ships that fit it: Once again we've got Ichimi/Jyushi-senpai. Pretty sure she killed him with a chainsaw in canon. (He got better.)

2. General Opinion: I need to be in the mood for something very dark to read snuff, but sometimes it can hit just right, especially when paired with possessiveness. "If I can't have you, no one else can"... yanderes, good shit. Cute girls being affectionate with their lover's mangled corpse... not even death can get in the way of true love! <3

3. Any ships that aren’t canon it But I’d read w/ the trope: Snuff might be too far for regular 'verse IchiJyushi, but if you want to take Ichimi as a terrifying look into Ichi's head, at emotions he knows he shouldn't be having and instead vents using fiction... I don't think he'd really kill Jyushi to keep him with him. But maybe something can be done where he gets close, then breaks down when he realizes what he's almost done. Ichi, you're a disgrace

#irk blubbers about nothing #irk got asked a thing #nerochinchin

[icanonlybe-human]

I got to see Pop today. He’s so, so thin.

Every time I say goodbye, it’s never “goodbye”, it’s “I’ll see you next time.” I want to give him a reason to stick around. And honestly, I dread when there won’t be a next time.

Chances are this is going to be the last time he’ll be around for one of my birthdays. He’s just wasting away. They had to put an extra mattress in his room for when he goes to bed because he falls so often. His entire body is just covered in sores that aren’t healing.

It breaks my heart to see him like this. But I’m making the most of seeing him while I can.

And I can’t help but think that I hope, for his sake that it ends soon. He’s in so much pain and hates where he is.

He’s become an official resident at the aged care home, so hopefully he’ll be moved out of his short-term room soon. But no one is telling him that he’s become permanent… that he’s never coming home. He still asks every day when he’s going to come home.

I’m also slightly pissed at my family, because turns out that everyone knew Pop got covid and didn’t tell me. Nan said it’s because she didn’t want to worry me. I said that I had as much right to know as everyone else. And given that I’m the only grandchild who regularly checks in, it hurts that my cousins who couldn’t give a smaller crap about Nan and Pop knew before I did.

And ignorance isn’t bliss in this case. I’m worried about them all the time anyway. Knowing what’s going on, even if it’s bad, stops my imagination from running rampant and making me think of worst case scenarios.

So yeah.

#diary #journal

[hawks-supremacy]

Golden Swirls

summary: when Sakusa's sister told him how people found their soulmates, he was disgusted. or at least until he found his.

pairing: sakusa x reader

genre: fluff and angst

word count: 3.2k

a/n: i finished this a week ago but didn't like it so i completely redid it. i also tried to write in 3rd pov which i don't think i'll do again, i'll probably just stick to 2nd pov but i wanted to try something new! anyway i hope you enjoy!

Sakusa Kiyoomi didn’t consider himself a germaphobe. Even though his cousin, Komori Motoya, liked to say he was, he still wouldn’t consider himself one. Although he said it in a joking manner it still made him think, do other people see him like that? He didn’t mind sitting or laying on the floor to do his stretches before practice, and dirt outside didn’t bother him much either. It was just other people and their germs that he didn’t care for. He doesn’t know where people have been or who could potentially be in the beginning stages of a cold and not know it. He was cautious around people, and bigger crowds made him nervous.

So when Sakusa learned about soulmates and how people found theirs at the age of 8 he was a little grossed out. What he remembers from the story his older sister told him was that everyone in the world has a soulmate, and the way you find yours was that when you made contact with your soulmate, the area you touched each other would light up in a sort of golden color. She told stories about how people would go around and try to touch everyone they thought could be their soulmate.

That’s what Sakusa thought was gross, trying to touch every single person on the off chance that they're your soulmate. Maybe it’s because he was always sick as a kid and that’s why he didn’t like the idea of other people’s germs. So as he grew up and saw people leaving gentle touches on the arms of everyone they met he couldn’t help but curl his lip in disgust. It wasn’t like Sakusa never wanted to find his soulmate, but he didn’t like the idea of people invading his personal space to find out.

High School for Sakusa was difficult, even though Motoya constantly told him he was a bit brash and abrasive that didn’t stop people from wanting to see if they were his soulmate. He managed to dodge nearly everyone who tried but occasionally there’d be a few who snuck in there with disappointed stares as their touch didn’t cause the warm golden glow signalling that they were soulmates.

Now Sakusa was a professional volleyball player for the MSBY Black Jackals and dodging the fleeting touches of fans only seemed to get harder the longer he was in the spotlight. He watched from a distance as his teammates shook hands and hugged every fan that approached them, watched as the shoulders of fans slumped at the lack of gold in their touch. Watched as fans jealously stared when his captain Meian Shugo found his soulmate in the crowded court after a game.

He had just left the locker rooms and glanced in the gym to see another crowd of fans desperately trying to see if they were one of the team member’s soulmates, another crowd of fans disappointed when the outcome they were hoping for didn’t happen. “You’re not soulmate searching in the crowd of fans?” He glanced over, startled at the sudden voice next to him. He wasn’t used to the new presence quite yet.

L/n Y/n was the new manager of the Black Jackals, having started less than a month ago. They had already begun to learn everyone’s mannerisms and habits, knowing that Sakusa was one to avoid the crowds and interviews after games, opting to keep to himself. They knew that everyone else on the team had no issues meeting the fans and finding out if their soulmates were in the crowd much like Meian’s was.

Sakusa didn’t know a lot about Y/n, but they knew quite a bit about him just from observing their practices and games. Sakusa wasn’t sure if their views on soulmates matched his, if they also thought that the act of having to touch every person in hopes of finding “the one” was odd and not appealing. He wasn’t sure if they had simply just found their soulmate already and didn’t need to bother with everyone else. What he did know was that they kept their distance at practices.

Y/n always greeted everyone from a distance when they entered the gym for practices or before their games had started. When they brought their water bottles they set them on the bench rather than handing them to everyone on the team. When the team was gathering to talk about play strategies they would be sat at the bench, close enough to listen, always jotting things down on their clipboard. To Sakusa Kiyoomi, L/n Y/n was an enigma.

They were someone who kept to themselves, never getting too close to anyone else. On the occasion that they went out for dinner after games that the team had won and felt proud of, they always sat at the end of the table, never saying many words. They were quiet and soft spoken when they did speak. Giving gentle reminders or suggestions to the team. Even though they were quiet and kept to themself they still managed to become friends with almost everyone on the team.

They exchanged excited words with Bokuto as they exchanged stories from when they were in their high school years. They gave friendly but stern scoldings to Atsumu as he did something he knew he shouldn’t have, like swinging from the bars in the gym just because Hinata made a bet that he couldn’t. They gave silent smiles as they listened to Hinata enthusiastically shout sound effects as he described his favorite volleyball plays. They gave Sakusa words of encouragement while still keeping their distance because they knew that people he didn’t really know made him uncomfortable. But Sakusa didn’t know much about Y/n.

So as he looked down at them sitting on the floor across from the back entrance to the gym, waiting for him to answer their question, he wasn’t sure how to approach the conversation. “Or have you already found your soulmate?” They asked after Sakusa still hadn’t responded to their first question. “Uh no I haven’t found mine, have you?” He finally responded as he lowered himself to the ground, still a good distance away from them. They shook their head as they kept their eyes closed and their head leaning against the cold tile wall of the hallway. “Why are you sitting on the floor?” Sakusa asked after a few seconds of silence from both parties.

“I have a headache but Bokuto is my ride home, so I have to wait for him to finish greeting every fan and then he showers. So I’d say I still have a good hour to wait.” They replied, opening their eyes and tilting their head to look at Sakusa, “Why are you sitting on the floor?” He wasn’t sure how to respond, he didn’t have a reason for why he sat on the floor, he just sat there because they were also sitting on the floor.

“I can give you a ride home if you want Y/n.” He offered, changing the topic at hand. He wasn’t quite sure what compelled him to offer them a ride home, he just felt like it was right. “You don’t have to do that if you don’t want to. I’m perfectly content sitting here and waiting for Bokuto.” They said, closing their eyes again and turning their head towards the ceiling. “You have a headache Y/n, let me give you a ride home so you aren’t sitting here for an hour.” Sakusa said as he got up and looked at them expectantly. As they opened their eyes they sighed and got up, “Let me text Bokuto to let him know that I don’t need a ride and then we can leave.” They reluctantly agreed as they pulled out their phone to send Bokuto a text. He wouldn’t get it until he got to the locker room but at least then he would know. “Okay let’s go.” Y/n said as they started walking towards the exit with Sakusa still standing in the hallway, only beginning to follow them after they were halfway towards the exit.

As they drove home Sakusa learned a little bit more about Y/n. He learned that they had met Bokuto through Akaashi who was a distant cousin of theirs, so they were closer to Bokuto out of everyone on the team. He also learned that they lived in the same apartment building as Bokuto so they carpooled every morning, which is why they always showed up at the same time. He didn’t learn much about before they joined the team as the manager any time he asked they waved it off or changed the subject.

As Sakusa entered his home, a familiar ringtone started to chime from his coat pocket. Taking his phone out of his pocket he pressed the answer button seeing it was Motoya calling. “Hey Motoya, what’s up?” He held the phone between his shoulder and ear as he slipped off his shoes before correcting his grip on the small device. “Was just calling to let you know we have a game against each other coming up next month. Did you just get home from your game? I thought I heard the door close.”

“Yeah I got home late because I drove the new manager home. They were waiting for Bokuto, but they had a headache and he was going to be a while.” Sakusa explained as he walked over to his kitchen to find something to eat. “Oh you guys got a new manager? Who is it?” Motoya asked curiously. “Their name is L/n Y/n. They just started a few weeks ago, so I don’t really know much about them.” He said as he got out ingredients from the fridge and went to wash his hands.

“You mean L/n Y/n from Itachiyama?” As Motoya asked what he thought was an innocent question, Sakusa felt himself freeze, “Who was that again?” He asked hesitantly. “You don’t remember Y/n? You hated them, or at least it sure seemed like you did.I mean you were cold and distant to everyone but it seemed like it was worse with them.” As Motoya continued to explain to Sakusa who Y/n was he suddenly felt very terrible. From what he remembers Y/n wasn’t always shy and soft spoken. They used to be bubbly and friendly, always trying to include everyone, including him.

It wasn’t that he was mean to them by any means. He didn’t go out of his way to bully them, but one day he had enough of their bubbly and outgoing personality and just snapped. He wasn’t having the best day and hearing them just kind of set him off, and now he felt terrible, because Sakusa knew that sometimes all it took was one person to yell at someone who was outgoing and suddenly they weren’t as outgoing anymore as before. He doesn’t quite remember what he said but he remembers that after he yelled at Y/n, they were more quiet.

“Motoya, I didn’t even recognize them. They’re so different from when we were in high school, they’re so quiet now.” Sakusa said as he leaned on the counter with his head resting in the hand that wasn’t holding the phone. “Yeah they started being quiet after you yelled at them. Didn’t talk as much.” Motoya’s voice got softer the more he talked about it. “I don’t even remember what I said, Motoya.” Sakusa sighed. “Well first of all you told them that no one cared what they had to say, and then you said something along the lines of how you feel bad for whoever their soulmate is if they're going to be that loud all the time. It was pretty bad, Kiyoomi.” Motoya changed the subject and they talked about something else for a bit before Sakusa had to eat something and then shower if he wanted to go to bed at a decent time.

It was the next morning and Sakusa was heading over to Y/n’s house to try and apologize. He wouldn’t see them today since they usually have the day after a game off so that the team can rest. He was suddenly very nervous as he knocked on the door to their apartment. “Bokuto, you have to learn how to cook something at some point, I can’t feed you all the time!” He heard their voice get closer to the door as they walked towards it, and soon the door was pulled open, “Oh you’re not Bokuto. Sorry, he usually comes over around this time every day on our days off. Uh come in?”

As they moved out of the way and opened the door more Sakusa noticed that they wore an Itachiyama sweater and suddenly felt stupid that he didn’t realize sooner. As he stepped in and slipped off his shoes he took note that the apartment was pretty clean other than a few things here and there. “Sorry it’s a mess, I was going to clean today and then well you showed up.” Y/n said as they went through and picked up a few things, “Are you hungry? It’s about noon, have you eaten? I was in the middle of making lunch, but I made enough for like four people because I don’t understand that I can cut the recipe down.” He watched as they rambled and walked around the kitchen to finish cooking the lunch they had started before he arrived.

“Yeah I’ll eat if you don’t mind. I didn’t eat anything before I came over.” He said sitting down on one of the stools by the counter. Even as he was around them for just a few minutes he couldn’t comprehend why he would yell at them like he did. Their presence was so warm and inviting, they were so caring and observant of everyone around them. Now he felt like even more of an ass before he came over to their apartment.

“Not that I don’t want to hang out with you or anything, but why exactly did you come over to my apartment today?” They asked setting down two plates of food on the counter and taking a seat across from Sakusa. Sakusa moved the food around his plate for a bit while he nervously thought about how to start the conversation. “I’m sorry.” He said and looked up, “About what happened when we were at Itachiyama.” Y/n paused, their food halfway to their mouth, and set down their utensils. “Oh, so you do remember that.” They said fidgeting with their hands, “I had honestly thought you forgot. It’s okay though Sakusa, it’s been what? Five years since that’s happened? I’ve moved past it, we’re different people than we were back then. I kinda get it though, I was a little much huh?” They asked, beginning to eat again.

“It wasn’t okay though, I shouldn’t have talked to you like that just because I was having a bad day Y/n. People care about you and what you have to say, and I guarantee your soulmate will love how bubbly and excited you always are.” Sakusa apologized again, he wasn’t sure he would ever be able to apologize enough to them. “Honestly Sakusa it’s fine, I’ve gotten over it, besides I might never find my soulmate anyway.” Y/n said as they finished their food and put their plate in the sink. “I know you got more quiet because of what I said. You’re not as outgoing or bubbly anymore, you’re more shy and reserved than before and I feel awful for that. I didn’t realize that what I said could have that big of an impact on you-”

“Well it did.” Y/n interrupted him, “It impacted me so much Sakusa. I was just trying to include you so you didn’t feel left out during group projects or activities. I was just trying to be nice to you Sakusa, you know it’s really stupid I even had a little crush on you. I know that’s dumb because the chances of us being soulmates is basically zero, but you were nice to me. You talked to me, helped me on the homework, and somewhere along the way I developed a crush. Then you yelled at me.” Y/n took a deep breath and laughed pathetically, “You yelled at me, which is really stupid, because people told me all the time that I was “too much” and needed to calm down. But it was different coming from you, coming from someone who I had thought had become a friend of mine.”

“Y/n I’m so sorry, I didn’t know.” Sakusa said as he made his way toward them. “I know you didn’t, Sakusa. I told you I’m over it. I guess I just wanted to yell back at you for it, even if it is five years later. Honestly I forgave you two years after it happened. I’m still bubbly and outgoing, it’s just that I wasn’t sure if you would’ve hated that at practice so I toned it down. Ask Bokuto, he’ll tell you.” Sakusa had felt a little better after hearing that from Y/n. He wasn’t sure he’d ever forgive himself if they had never gone back to their excitable personality.

“Here let me help with the dishes.” Sakusa said as he reached for the plate in their hand. They were about to protest when they felt a warm go on the tip of their index finger where his hand brushed theirs. Sakusa watched in awe as golden swirls danced around both of your finger tips, somehow in sync like a dance that wasn’t quite complete without its partner to help hold the rhythm of the number. The warmth of his hand was nothing like his sister had described to him. It felt like the first rays of sun in the morning on a warm autumn day with more of a comforting warmth than a hot one.

Neither of the two said anything as they watched the golden swirls fade away, but still felt the warmth of them underneath the skin still. “I know I said I had a crush on you earlier and I should be ecstatic that this is happening but a part of me can’t help but find this really ironic.” Y/n said laughing, still staring at their hands. “What do you mean?” Sakusa asked with a confused stare as he looked at Y/n. “You don’t think this is ironic? You literally told me my soulmate would find me annoying and now you’re my soulmate. It’s kind of funny.” Y/n explained, finally looking up at Sakusa.

Sakusa thought for a minute with furrowed eyebrows before realizing what they meant. “Would you be quiet about that?” He asked now laughing at the situation as well, “We just found out we’re soulmates and you’re making jokes? I’m glad you’re back to your old self but come on Y/n.” He gave a gentle shove to their shoulder as they laughed more at the situation and Y/n continued to make jokes and lightly shoved him back.

Outside the apartment Bokuto lowered his ready to knock fist with a smile, deciding to come back at a later time as he heard laughing coming from the inside of the usually quiet apartment.

#sakusa x you #haikyuu sakusa #sakusa oneshot #sakusa x y/n #sakusa x reader #sakusa imagine #sakusa fluff #sakusa angst #sakusa fic #sakusa imagines #haikyuu au #haikyuu drabbles #haikyuu imagine #haikyuu x reader #haikyu x reader #soulmate au