#and fuck batman !

[oncillabrigade]

Finally read Robins!

I have a lot of thoughts, but I just want to say this panel is the funniest thing I've ever seen:

#addressing Bruce as Batman is such a tell too #hilarious and fucked up #tim drake #bruce wayne #batfam #i continue to maintain that tim being a champion liar while looking like that has given him such an unfair advantage in life #no one suspects this awkward twink with survival skill-level excellence in lying to parental figures is lying to them #not even bruce #my dude this is why you are no longer the world's greatest detective #anyway #I fuckin' love tim drake #robin #robins (2022)

[frownyalfred]

Bruce Wayne is so much stronger than me, because if I was him I would walk straight up to Lex Luthor at a fundraiser, lean down, and whisper you want to fuck Superman so bad it makes you look stupid in his ear before flitting away with zero context.

#bonus points for superbat here #then it’s personal #like lex you wish you could fuck superman #luckily I can whenever I like #bruce wayne #batman #dc #lex luthor #thoughts

[emotional-piece-of-meat]

"Bruce loves his children to infinity but sucks at communication" gotta be one of my favourite tropes.

What Bruce means: I miss you so much it hurts, you are a great hero, and I'm really glad that you still consider me as part of your life and share your thoughts with me.

What Bruce does: hums meaningfully in response to Dick's story.

What Bruce means: I'm sorry about everything that happened between us, I still love you and want to fix our relationship, I'm incredibly grateful that you don't avoid me.

What Bruce does: nods at Jason when sees him on the patrol.

What Bruce means: I deeply care about you, you are truly important to me, I worry about your health and I don't want you to repeat my mistakes, neglecting yourself for the sake of a mission.

What Bruce does: gives Tim a snack without any explanation.

What Bruce means: I'm very proud that, despite everything you were taught, you choose to be a good person and help people, you have a kind soul, and it's an honour to me to call you my son.

What Bruce does: gives Damian an intensive head pat.

Should I say that Cassie is a blessing?

They stare at each other's soul for a solid five minutes and it's basically a full ass conversation.

#Boys definitely adopted his habits #and every time they do it they are like #oh fuck I'm just like my dad #batman #batfam #batfamily #bruce wayne #batdad #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #cassandra cain

[arunneronthird]

#id say im projecting but im not sure im not drawing anime #made myself laugh with the face so i think it works #dick grayson #damian wayne #nightwing #dc comics #batman #my art #ladies. gentleman. you have eaten well. #tumblr fucked up the whole res so click on it thank u

[daydreamerwonderkid]

Somebody rescue Tim. He's seen too much.

You do NOT have permission to repost my art.

Meme reference under cut:

#dreamer doodles #bruce wayne #batman #tim drake #robin #robin iii #red robin #so fucking jazzed i finally finished this old af WIP #still trying to figure out how to draw tim and bruce #i live for that one fanon bit #where tim has a habit of making increasingly ridiculous #powerpoint presentations that the batfam #are forced to sit down and listen to

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

Instead of Dick or Tim, Red Hood straight up goes for kidnapping Bruce Wayne and keeping him hostage just to see how desperate the birds get in trying to find him.

It’s a foolproof plan. Batman won’t blow his cover unless absolutely necessary, and “Brucie” would never know how to slip away from a crime lord of Red Hood’s caliber. It’s foolproof. It’s perfect. Jason can keep dropping hints and make threats towards the birds and watch Bruce squirm without consequences if he plays this right.

But then “Brucie” keeps begging him not to hurt his kids…

#Jason miscalculated #seeing Batman frightened is one thing #but without the cowl he’s just Bruce #and Bruce was Jason’s DAD #it’s pretty hard to see him plead like that #and ffs Jason was just suggesting MILD torture with Tim #now stop CRYING Brucie omG #Jason is totally NOT close to tears himself no fucking way #meanwhile dick and Tim: #SCREAMING IN DISTRESS #jason todd #batfamily #batfam #dick grayson #robin #tim drake #bruce wayne #red hood #Nightwing #batdad #prompts #fic #titans tower au does this count? #enemy to caretaker for certain tho #or more like #enemy to son #or enemies to family? #huh #Batman #fanfiction

[bansq]

that one meme everyone is doing

#dick grayson #damian wayne #batman #batfamily #bansq art #the colors are all fucked up but oh well

[starspilli]

lazy

#jason todd #dc #dc comics #batman #dc fanart #red hood #batfamily #my art #idk if this looks fucked up lol. ignore it

[nerdpoe]

Danny is about to be kidnapped in Gotham This is not a good time.

He's studying for the SAT, he's already been kidnapped by Vlad like, four times that week and it was a fucking Tuesday, he forgot his wallet at his new apartment, locked himself out of said new apartment (he could phase through the door but that wasn't the point), he's just been informed that the grant he applied for was denied so he needs to ask his mom and dad for college funds when he'd already told them he had it covered, and just...it was shit.

It had been shit. The entire week had been awful and annoying and he was ready to either murder everyone on the planet or go find a corner to cry in for the next three days.

So when the band of wild goons working for whatever villain of the week pulled up and tried to kidnap him, he snapped.

He used them to vent.

Shouted about how terrible his day had been, how terrible his week had been, how he'd already been kidnapped by his creepy godfather who was way too into him, how college funding was shit and the grant system was rigged, and how he'd have to call a locksmith or break down the door to his own apartment if he wanted to go to bed-all of it. He unloaded all of his frustration.

The goons actually backed off.

One of them gave him an awkward side hug and told him it'd get better.

Danny wasn't paying attention to his surrounding. He doesn't realize that the whole thing was livestreamed.

So when he gets home to his apartment later that day, his door is opened for him by the vigilante Spoiler before he can even turn intangible.

She brought over BatBurger and kidnapped Bruce Wayne, Gotham's bumbling Prince, to talk about college grants.

#dpxdc #dcxdp #dp x dc #dc x dp #phanfic #story prompt #steph watched the livestream and felt GREAT SYMPATHY #so she actually did trick bruce into coming with her and breaking into an apartment as bruce wayne instead of batman #told him it was an important job #he clued in that it wasn't crime related after she told him to stay put so she could get food #sure fuck it he'll give this rando kid a grant #he'll pay for the whole thing education is important #literally no one looks into the whole “i've already been kidnapped four times this week” thing #cuz everyone gets kidnapped in gotham #well almost no one looks into it #jack and maddie fenton do when they see the clip #vlad learns the hard way not to piss off the people who design weapons specifically meant for you

[dragonpyre]

What I love about Jason Todd is that he's angry about his trauma. Life fucked him over and he's rightfully pissed off. We already have "healed from their anger" Dick Grayson and "ignores their emotions" Bruce Wayne. Thank you DC for giving us "hurt and upset and lashing out" Jason Todd.

#this is extremely personal to me and no I will not elaborate #but like #let someone with ptsd be fucking angry #let them be upset #cuz jesus christ #what they went through was AWFUL #jason todd #dc #dc comics #red hood #batman #text post

[not-another-robin]

I think Alfred should have a cat friend

#her name is madam....... #narsposting #dc comics #batman #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #bruce thought he fucked up again #madam the cat

[frownyalfred]

my favorite thing in Justice League fics is when a character fucks up so badly that their only option is to go talk to Batman. And they still — still — take a moment to figure out how desperate they are before going.

Bruce has such “don’t bother me, I’m working, also why the hell would you do that” disapproving dad energy. It’s stunning.

#bruce wayne #batman #justice league #jl #dc #dc comics #when Clark tells you to go see batman you know you’re fucked #it’s like mom saying to go talk to dad #and dad is working in the basement with his tools swearing

[martyrbat]

batman: odyssey (2011) #6

remember only one of them actually went to med school and got their degree and it is NOT the man dressed as a giant bat !!!

#doctor al ghul and her lame ass ex husband..... #shes the embodiment of 'if i had a lame boyfriend id hype him up so much ill make him stand outside and tell people here comes the most #special boy in existence and if they dont clap and cheer im blowing this whole fucking building up' post #c: batman: odyssey (2011) | i: 6 #crypt's panels #batman #talia al ghul #brutalia

[lustwithoutlore]

Stephanie, clearly upset: I just spent $30 at the grocery store and all I got was eggs, mayonnaise, fruit, and pop.

Tim: Oh so prices have gone down, that’s good.

Stephanie: …. I really hate you sometimes, Tim. Really hate you.

Tim: Isn’t $30 for all that cheap?

Stephanie, calling Jason: I need an immediate extraction I’m about to kill Tim.

Jason: … And you need the extraction, why?

#steph: *cocks gun* time to eat the fucking rich #tim: thank god if I get killed I can finally rest #steph: *lowers gun* uh…. you good bro? #batfamily #batman #jason todd #red hood #batfam #tim drake #stephanie brown #batgirl #red robin #dc comics #dc comics funny #incorrect batfamily quotes

[littlefankingdom]

Talia introduced Damian to Bruce as "their second child", and now Bruce is mentally panicking because there's another one, somewhere, when this unspoken first child is Jason.

#bruce wayne #jason todd #talia al ghul #damian wayne #batman #red hood #robin #dc comics #I'm cooking over here #my ramblings #No Talia and Jason didn’t fuck she literally raised him when he was an unstable teenager #she literally raised him because she wanted to play family with Bruce #she's a fucked up mom but she wants the best for her babies

[jieloksworld]

I SWEAR THIS FUCKING MAN RIGHT HERE

dudes be like the alien guy was hot so pinned him to the fucking floor

#I swear to GOD this guy has tension with pretty much everyone #this fucking man #the batman 2004 #the batman #batman #bruce wayne #bruce wayne the batman 2004 #dc batman #dc #martian manhunter #martian manhunter the batman 2004 #the batman 2004 martian manhunter #the batman martian manhunter #batman martian manhunter #dc martian manhunter #martianbat #spacebat #j'onn j'onzz #the batman 2004 j'onn j'onzz