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#and half the time even if its a language i know nothing about you can tell its a translation because of how awkward the english is
durn3h · 5 months
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Why is the average person so bad at translating? I get it if you aren't a native in the target language, but if you are translating something into your own language it should sound like something a native speaker would actually say. Like, you speak and write in that language every day, you know how it works and it's clear from your poor attempt at translating that you know the meaning of the text in it's original language, so where's the problem that's causing your translation to be so awkward?
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tailsz · 10 months
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Demon slayer men boyfriend headcannons‼️
(NSFW INCLUDED)
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Includes : Tanjiro , Zenitsu , Inosuke , Tomioka , Sanemi , Tengen , Obanai , Muzan , Akaza , Douma , and Kokushibo
(this is my first post so bear with me AND english isn’t my first language so sorry for mistakes!)
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Tanjiro!
okay so we ALL know this guy has the sweetest heart so expect a lot of lovely dovey gestures such as….
Cute little morning letters if he leaves before you or you just don’t work as a demon slayer!
something along the lines of “i made you breakfast eat it before it gets too cold!! I hope you have a lovely day and i love you so so much”
(if ur parents are still alive 😍) he will absolutely win them over EVEN IF THEYRE THE MOSG HARDCORE PEOPLE EVERRR
he has a way with people what can you say
multiple lunch dates a week are a must! you guys go out and try as as many restaurants when you guys go on missions together if ur a demon slayer!
if not he will personally bring you takeout from his missions!
you and nezeko bonded a lot and she LOVES when you play with her hair it makes her sleepy ASAP (tanjiro walked in during the middle of this and his heart almosy exploded)
for y’all’s free time you both decided to try new hobbies together like Yoga, art , dancing ETC ITS VERY CUTE MOMENTS!
NSFW!
he’s a soft dom! but if you bring up the thought of you topping him he will NOT object
OH HE IS SUCH A ROMANTIC IN BED
Sex with him is literally the embodiment of “love making” because he showers you with love and pleasure
MISSIONARY 100% OF THE TIME
he is vanilla but that doesn’t matter because he’s drowning you with praises and caressing your perfect body <3
his aftercare is literally going to heaven and back
he’ll massage you and whisper sweet nothings into your ears
THIGHS GUY
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Zenitzu!!
at the beginning he’s really REALLY awkward
might even like be hella weird towards you (because you’re the first woman/man he’s ever been perused as romantically)
SO GIVE HIM TIME HE’LL GET THERE
Once he does he will quite LITERALLY will kill everyone in a room and then himself for you
you are his princess (your also his knight and shining armor because… well… it’s zenitzu…)
1000% shows you off like a medal of honor to ANYONE AND I MEAN ANYONE
this one time he was blabbing about you to a stranger to the point where said stranger just respectfully told him he doesn’t care
you had to STRAP HIM DOWN to prevent bodily injuries
he likes taking afternoon walks with you , he really enjoys the beautiful site with his beautiful partner
he randomly picks up flowers from the ground and gives them to you because they reminded you of him!
NSFW!!
he is a switch with a bottom preference
the thought of you just absolutely demolishing him will get his body all fuzzy and tingling 🤭
reverse cowgirl is his FAVORITE POSITION OF ALL TIME HANDS DOWN
the nights when it’s not just pleasure he likes to top you and take things slow to show you just how much you mean to him
as well as absolutely showering you with corny praises (he’s so silly!)
HIS AFTER CARE IS ODD
if he’s SPENT he will most likely pass out leaving you in charge of aftercare
if not he’ll just cuddle u to sleep
(totally not because that means he’ll see u naked again in the morning)
TITS GUY
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inosuke!
he didn’t comprehend the fact that you 2 we’re dating 🧍🏽‍♀️
you had to explain to him and half way through the was flustered and asked you to SQARE UP?? (HE HAD A NO IDEA HOW TO RESPOND TO THAT)
like zenitsu he was also very much awkward if not more at the start of the start of the relationship
But not awkward in a hes shy way
NO HES AWKWARD BECAUSE HE DOESNT WANT TO SHOW??? FEELINGS??
because that’s gross
Tanjiro and Zenitsu had to help the guy to at least an OUNCE of a romantic
he’s really not much of one though
his idea of dates or romance of training or fighting w/ you!
you don’t really mind but if it does get to a point where it bothers you by the lack of romance
HE WILL TRY (key word TRY) to be more affectionate towards you!
he sees a pretty rock? it’s yours!
he sees a pretty branch it’s yours!
he sees a cute cayote? It’s you-
the time he actually brought you one you almost SHAT yourself 😓
NSFW!!
oh he’s a dom
he views smexy time as a challenge
so you bringing up the idea of topping is you trying to WIN and he would rather DIE than lose
again the concept was a foreign area to him
and if you both get to the sexual parts for a relationship , he will seek guidance from you!
(while also refusing for you to demonstrate for him because he “knows what he’s doing” 😒
what’s aftercare?
he does not do it at first meaning you are doing it
after a while he’ll start picking up after you and do it himself
(if you tease him about it he will throw you off the bed)
ASS GUY
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Tomioka!
When he asked you out he said
“will you take my hand in a relationship”
it’s as serious as it sounds
he is comfortable as soon as you begin the relationship because of 2 reasons
for him to consider a relationship with you , you’d guys would’ve have to know eachother for a while
and because if you didn’t want him you would’ve said no
AND SINCE YOU DIDNT😍
hes 100% sure you guys will be just fine WHICH YOU ARE :D
little small gestures of affection from you will get his heart flipping like—
holding his hands ESPECIALLY WHEN YOU BEGING CONTACT WITH PINKY TOUCH 😓
(he’s touch starved FEED HIM)
the one time you begged him to let you style his hair was the day that he won’t let you do anything else BUT that
he loves how your fingers feel against his head
sending tingles down his spine of safety yk?
he carries anything you give him in his haori (like little charms!)
he likes it when you whisper sweet nothings into his ears it gets him all giggly
NSFW!!
he is a switch with no preference
he will be whatever you want him to be 😍
when he top’s he can get carried away with eagerness
when you guys have sex he very much loses his mind which is why he can be rough when he tops
HOWEVER WHEN HE BOTTOMS JESUS CHRIST
He will be a whimpering mess
being your little slut asking for more n more <3
being a hashira he can and WILL last very long
he’s 1000% into hair pulling both giving n reviving
as u guys last longer n longer into the relationship he will be more open to risks 😍
(like public sex)
this one time did the deed in a public bathroom in a restaurant while the rest of the hashiras were waiting on the food 🤭
He will run a bath for the 2 of you afterwards and fall asleep in each others arms<3
he’s an ass guy
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Sanemi!
like giyuu , for him to consider a relationship with you , you have a LONGG history
it took him a while for him to actually ask you out 🧍🏽‍♀️
it got to the point where he was going to lose you to someone else because of how long it took
shinobu “helped” to ask you out
and by help i mean he forced him to ask you out in front of her
shinobu top tier wingwoman fr fr ‼️(she had enough of him wasting an opportunity so she took matters into her own hands)
he will absolutely NOT do PDA (at least at the beginning of the relationship)
his ego n pride are too much for that
once he gets over himself he will at MOST hold hands with you ig 😒😒
he forces u to train with him
he is an AMAZING cook and makes you breakfast n lunch (house husband material!!)
he’s also surprisingly good at doing hair whether it’s short or long! (he makes u buns a lot )
he’s such a romantic behind closed doors
shinobu caught him in the middle of that act and while she didn’t tell anyone…
she teased him to DEATH
NSFW!!
oh he’s a MEAN top no questions asked
he will degrade you to the BONE (which you don’t mind 🤭)
he’s also very VERY rough hitting and attacking ALLL of your sweet spots on your body (inside as well 😋)
he loves calling you a needy slut 🤭
ONE TIME. he has a wet dream where you topped him and... HE WOKE UP WITH THE HARDEST BONER OF HIS LIFE
he will never ever EVERR bring up the idea of u topping him ( if you bring up he MIGHT let it happen🤨 he’s so stubborn)
HE IS SO MEAN WHEN IT COMES TO ORGASM.
if he’s fucking you because he’s jealous or you pissed him off???
he’s going to deny your orgasms for an hour ☠️
SEX DRIVE?? MEDIUM
STAMINA IS . HIGHHHH
he’s pretty average with aftercare , he’ll bring u water n a towel
on a good day you both will shower together! (50/50 chance that y’all will fuck again!)
he’s a thigh guy
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tengen!!
what’s another wife to the list?
all four of them (tengen n his wives) found you very attractive at first sight and they had NO shame into admitting that
after knowing you for a while THEY ALL asked you join the relationship! it caught u off guard 😨
when you entered the relationship they literally all wanted u for themselves 😓
tengen is SUCH A ROMANTIC AND WILL ABUSE PDA SO MUCH
if you’re a fellow hashira my god he will tease you in public so much??? and you’re like FOR WHAT???
hashira meetings will get HELLA awkward with both of y’all (everyone is just like “this again??☠️”
like zenitzu he will FLEX U SOO BAD especially to single folks because in his eyes being single is such a skill issue 🤨
his form of affection is expensive gifts so
EXPECT TO BE PAMPERED WITH A LOT OF JEWELRY 🤭 ( we love sugar daddies )
he also refuses to NOT take y’all on fancy restaurants because anything other than that is LAME AND TACKY 🤨
MATCHING OUTFITS ARE A MUST!!
after he retired, you guys have religious weekly movie nights a lot (you all take turns in picking movies)
NSFW!!
OKAY SO TENGEN IS A SWITCH WITH A PREFERENCE ON TOPPING
now he has 2 different ways of going about it
if it’s sex on One on One , HE IS SO MEAN??
he will 100% mock you during the whole thing
mocking when you choke on air or a moan is his specialty 😓😓
seeing you cock drunk will drive him CRAZY
thighs are so HOT TO HIM (thigh highs are a must!)
he leaves so many bite marks and bruises on your inner thighs
HIS HANDS ARE HUGE DAWG
he likes fingering before fucking and GOD HES SO GOOD AT FINGERING?
he can n WILL make u come more than twice with just his fingers😓
it’s a the whole group sex with him n his wife’s
he’s a sweetheart! taking care of his little princess nasty needs!
when he bottoms with all 4 of you on him he gets so cocky 😒
he loves how you all take care of HIS nasty needs in such a good way
HAIR PULLING
and he’s very much into orgasm denial HES A JERK
def a tits guy
bdsm king
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OBANAI ( i love him sm ) <333
okay uh
before y’all started dating he was so shy around you because??? you’re so??? perfect?????
if you so much as breathe into his direction he will literally die
he asked u in the most romantic cliche ever (but it doesn’t matter because he pulled it off so well??)
he made you follow little notes at night eventually leading to a tree that had a saying “will you be my mine and go out on a date with me?” with 2 boxes saying yes and no
at first you were confused until you saw a familiar snake 🤭 making you giggle you chose the yes box!
HE WAS INTERNALLY SCREAMING BC HE THOUGHT HE WAS BEING HELLA CRINGE 😓
moving onto the relationship…
he is literally the perfect boyfriend
when he gets needy n wants to talk to u , he sends kaburamaru to fetch you!
kaburamaru literally loves u too ! ( obanai also send u flowers through him!)
he gets jealous easy like VERY
he’s very protective of you ! and he expects the same because you are his and he’s all urs <3
will literally end the bloodline of ANYONE who talks smack abt u
at first, yalls kisses would be with his mask on. he still wasn’t ready to let that open yet
after a whole LONG while , he got enough confidence to kiss u with his scars and everything (which u appreciated and enjoyed very much <3)
he likes holding pinkies while walking together
he’s not really a fan of PDA but if someone is trying to flirt with u????
oh U BETTER BET HES GOING TO BE ALL OVER U (u don’t complain)
he makes flower crowns for the both of y’all daily <33
y’all have hella picnic dates it’s getting out of hand atp! y’all barely eat at home
NSFW!!
obanai is a top with 2 sides to him…
A- he can be the most sappy romantic when y’all have sex
OR B- HES LITERALLY BEING ASSHOLE TO YOU
There’s in NO between
when hes being a jerk he denies orgasms
and his liking to marking is x10
he loves leaving bitemarks he knows u can’t hide🤭
def into u riding him but HES in total control
u brought up that you like it when he puts his hair in a pony tail when y’all have sex so HE DOES IT ALL THE TIME
he’s not really much of a risk taker
will not stop unless your trembling😋
if he’s being sweet he’s take things slow making sure your enjoying yourself as well as him <3
will whisper sweet nothings <3
HIS EARS ARE SENSITIVE‼️‼️
he treats u like a goddess in aftercare
will get u water , a towel , a warm bath , tons of cuddles and a lil snack 😋
HES INTO BONDAGE
HES AN ASS GUY 🤭🤭
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Muzan 😨
to how you got together? you don’t even know
if your a human , you ran into while im a hurry ! you work at a flower shop and was carrying flower pots getting dirt all over his clothes
now he was so ready to end the puny moron who ran into him but..
when he saw you apologizing and apologizing your heart out he felt something? what the hell was that? well it’s not like matters… 😁
If you’re a demon you first of all had to have know him and been loyal to him for CENTURIES for him to even REMOTELY like you
once he does tho you’re always buy his side , like his right hand man/woman! it may seem like he just thinks ur strong but this is his way of spending time with u<33 (while being in denial😓)
now how he asked you out. he didn’t do anything fancy! he just called you in and he straight up told you he liked you and would like make yalls relationship more
if you are a human.. he brought you to a demon meeting and told everyone there that if they even THINK about doing ANYTHING to you he will turn them inside out and throw into the sun<3
he thinks akaza is the best fit for his lovely human wife! you guys get along rlly well
he will keep DOUMA FARRRR AWAY FROM YOU.
koko and u like to read and drink tea together! he finds ur being calming
if you’re a demon everyone already knows u but know muzan expects equal respect from them to you!
though he can be very cold at blunt at time , he can still be romantic towards you!
he likes buying you expensive things to make u feel like a queen
if a human or demon disrespects you in ANY WAY not matter how big or small?they will be no more 😓
NSFW!!
oh man no matter how i see it.
HE
IS
A
TOP
he’s the demon king he expects to be in full control at ALL times and 9 times outta 10.. HE IS MEAN TO U
Doesn’t matter how much he loves you , you will never be superior to him 🧍🏽‍♀️
certified brat tamer!
oh he’s definitely into marking you just the thought of owning what’s rightfully his gets him hard
he’s into degradation so much it’s a problem atp☠️
dont ever degrade him tho
he’ll make sure you NEVER walk again
he puts the d in bdsm
will not stop until you’re a whimpering and crying mess only able to scream out his name :(
he doesn’t know if he likes public sec because he doesn’t like the idea of the chance that people have on seeing what only HE can see
ON THE OTHER HAND. THAT MEANS PEOPLE KNOW UR HIS AND ONLY HIS EVEN MORE….
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Akaza!!
Whether your a demon slayer/hashira or a fellow uppermoon, akaza admired you for being strong
after all akaza think people who r both mentally and physically strong r the best as u can tell with rengoku
before he asked u out, he had to come to terms with it , as he felt he was betraying his late wife
after he accepted the fact that’s it’s okay to move on.. he asked you out in the most akaza way!
he got you a bouquet of flowers 💐 with a little note in it telling u about all the things that he absolutely loves abt u! after reading them , he asked you out!
if you’re a demon you both will be more relaxed about people knowing abt you’re relationship!
until muzan found out.. at first he disapproved because he saw no benefits from u two being in love 🤨
but later on seeing how you two empower eachother be GUESSES it’s ok 😒😒
HOWEVER IF YOURE A HASHIRA..
you two r trying to HARD to keep it super lowkey
it’s mostly night dates n visits you guys can do :( but it’s ok u guys make it work
because the SECOND one or both of ur masters find out… YALL R DEAD
REGARDLESS akaza is very flexible with himself (as a metaphor BUT HE PROBABLY IS LITERALLY)
he absolutely LOVESS self care nights with you!!
talking shit while doing eachother a face masks is one of his favorite pastimes! (the pretty mama gotta do what he can to stay pretty DUH)
douma teases him abt u so much it’s driving him mad
especially because douma is hella touchy w/ h JUST to piss akaza off
which it always ends with douma head on the floor😨
NSFW!!
akaza is 100% a switch with a top preference
he teases u a lot.. BUT IF YOURE A HASHIRA HE STRAIGHT UP MOCKS U😓😓
like he’ll say things like “i thought hashiras we’re supposed to have a lot of stamina.. what’s wrong :(“ ALL WHILE HES SMIRKING
he likes eating you out before fucking you
THE THINGS HIS TOUNGE CAN DO TO UR BODY 😓
he is very rough with you, but holds back a bit if you’re human because if he goes all out he will quite literally break u
IF YOURE A DEMON THO YOURE IN FOR IT ALL😍‼️‼️
even when he’s bottoming he’s still being a little asshole 😒
he completely switches up w/ aftercare! he’s such a sweetheart making u a bath for the two if u to cuddle in for a bit<33
he is a THIGH MAN ALL THE WAY his hands r always resting on them 🤭
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douma!
oh my ?
ok douma likes energetic people so that’s a starter for him to start liking you and ofc knowing you for a couple of decades
i think the thing that sealed off his love for you was the fact that you didn’t treat him like he was weird yk?
you talked to him like he was normal person (well demon but you get what i mean! but he’s SOO far from normal ☠️☠️)
MOVING ONNN he asks you out by making a little game out of it! maybe like pictionary or hang man! it’s rlly silly <33
while your dating even if your a demon or human he will treat you like your made of glass
he views you like one of his dolls ! therefore your his precious
he rlly likes it when you style his hair , in fact he asks you to do so regularly
during the summer time it gets rlly humid n hot as hell in japan even at night so he used his demon art to cool u both off !
akaza asked you to blink 3 times if the relationship was not from ur free will when he found out 😨😨
u guys both have matching fans 🤭🤭
muzan has to literally rip his head off because douma won’t stop talking to u during meetings ☠️
HE IS A BRITNEY SPEARS STAN ‼️‼️
NSFW!!
douma is a switch with no preference it just depends on hows feeling that day (it’s mostly bottom)
He is such a bratty bottom i tell you, he just pushes your buttons til u snap
and snapping means you literally demolishing his ass until she can’t even form any sentences :(
oh jesus christ but when he tops?????
praying for u fr fr
douma is unfair as hell
HE WILL DENY YOUR ORGAMS FOR FUNSIES?? like NOTHING ABT THAT IS FUNNY??
he is súper into bondage
AND EVERYTHING HES SO KINKY
never feel afraid to tell this man any of ur kinks even if they’re weird bc douma will try it out with you no hesitation!
his aftercare is a little rocky but it’s nothing too bad..
at most hes get you both waters and y’all will just chill in bed or anywhere
speaking of anywhere.. HE WILL FUCK U ANYWHERE HE DOES NOT CARE‼️‼️
one time muzan heard y’all bc y’all are SO LOUD (he decapatated both of you on the spot)
he is an ass guy oh my god he can’t go a day without touching it 😓
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Kokushibo!!
okay first all i dont think he cares what type of personality u r (extroverted or introverted)
it does take him a while to accept his feelings towards you because he doesn’t many to get distracted from his duties
but when he pushes that aside he just straight up asks you to stay by his side for the rest of time 💐
he doesn’t do PDA because your love life is not the business of others (muzan thanks the lords for this because he does NOT want to see that)
you guys randomly found a black cat following you one time while on a mission and you wanted to keep it with him!
…..YOU HAD TO BEG HIM FOR AN HOUR BUT HE eventually GAVE IN💔
y’all named her Ei (he will never admit but he will kill anyone who harms her bc he loves her sm)
you like to kiss all 6 of his eyes after a long day (he expects you to do it regularly and gets upset when u don’t)
sometimes asks you do braid his hair to change up his hair style 😋
he makes u train with him to he ensure you’re able to defend yourself from anyone!
matching katanass!! (much to his dismay because god forbid y’all do something cute 😒)
hel likes to carry you in piggy back style a lot 😋
NSFW!!
oh he’s a top no doubt
he will absolutely NOT let u top
BUT YOURE OK WITH IT BECAUSE GAWD DAMN
he is so rough with you that’s all he knows what to do<3
before touching you he wants to see you beg for it he LOVES seeing you all pathetic
HE LOVES FUCKING YOU AGAINST A WALL‼️‼️
he loves it because that means your trapped within in him, with no where to go and he has you EXACTLY how he wants you
oh he pulls your hair a lot when you give him head 🤭
he’s always biting your ears bc he knows they’re sensitive 🤭
he loves missionary as the main position because he gets to see all the expressions he’s making you have <3
HE IS A ASS GUYS ‼️‼️
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okay that’s it guys! leave me any request i’ll be happy to do so! <33
5K notes · View notes
zarnzarn · 8 months
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i see all these comments talking about this after the new episode, but. i would like to state for the record that stolitz isn't. toxic.
first off, the concept of a toxic and a healthy relationship are such... vague terms. when you're online, drenched in language and tight moral boundaries, trying to put a nuanced story like helluva boss's into boxes is easy to attempt and impossible to do.
a toxic relationship is one where one or both parties is maliciously affecting the other. I'm talking fetid, nasty, rude interactions where there is more hurt than love. they're unhappy more often than not when they're with their partner, there's no respect or give from the other side.
stolitz is nothing like that.
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Stolas actively cares about Blitz and actually has no fear or hesitation in ADMITTING IT OUT LOUD TO OZZIE. he has been calling, texting, commenting, laughing and finding ways to spend time with Blitz. he's throwing everything he has to the wind, finding the courage to move forward with the divorce, putting everything he has into trying to keep him. he's been alone in a palace since he was born, on medication, with such less people dear to him that he remembered the circus boy who spent a day with him DECADES ago- so when blitz comes into his life and brings back in laughter and color and sex, he's holding on with everything he's got.
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and blitz does care!!! he cares a LOT, the whole series we see him falling in love with stolas through SHOW NOT TELL (his expressions, his choices, his fear, his lashing out) and utterly unable to process that stolas cares about him too when talking to fizz; almost a desperate kind of denial-
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cause yknow. the first time he tried to confess something to someone he really liked, he accidentally killed half the people he knew and ruined the lives of the rest?
thats gonna leave just a teensy impact on the will to express your emotions in the future, methinks.
even before that, he clearly felt like on some level that he was unworthy and he's said twice that he despises himself for the accident even though it wasn't actually his fault. being self aware doesn't stop the emotions from emotioning.
he keeps insisting its only sex so urgently to anyone who doesn't ask because he can't even imagine it being anything else. he's both disappointed and relieved when he repeats that stolas sees him as a novelty, because what else can it be?
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(there's a whole other spiel of how brave both Stolas and Blitz have to be to say it out loud even when asmodeus can't afford to, considering how publically and completely beaten down both were at the club.)
(there's also another whole spiel about how frustrating it has been for ME to see all these comments over time with such bad takes based on like,, 20 min worth of info of a show that takes months to release an ep. like godDAMN have some patience?? let the story UNFOLD MAYBE? IT WAS ALWAYS GOING TO HAVE AN EXPLANATION WHY WOULD YOU CRITICIZE THINGS THAT ARENT EVEN FINISHED ESPECIALLY AN INDIE ANIMATION- i digress)
mind you, this has NOTHING to do with abuse. an abusive relationship is one where one is actively harming the other with full awareness. Stella is an abuser and their marriage is abusive.
and stolitz isn't that; it isn't even unhealthy or toxic. it's a consensual, transactional fuckbuddy relationship that slid into something more for both of them.
but!!!!! one of the main reasons for the problems that everyone looks over is-
they're in a BDSM relationship.
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I can't possibly delve into dynamics without making this a 10k research paper BUT even though we've gotten only hints and costumes and dialogue- they're very clearly and undeniably in a BDSM contract. Behind the scenes of this crazy show is a whole different story, of these two delving into the most hardcore kinks out there- knifeplay, painplay, bondage.
if you've gotten into the community, if you've read a couple dozen particularly good fics by authors who know what they're talking about, hell; even if your only experience is fifty shades or 365 or whatever- you gotta know that BDSM scenes are crazy fucking emotionally heavy. there's so much that has gone down between them during their full moons that helluva can't get into!!
but you know how in so many of these popular medias and fics, the dom in the relationship is also like,, the billionaire/mafia heir/prince, etc, the one with financial and physical power? this isnt that. it has been very clearly stated that stolas is subbing, blitz is domming.
now take a moment and think about how much that fucks up the dynamics.
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in stolas' eyes, blitz is a confident, dangerous individual who's an old friend and cherished memory of his, who he's trusted wholly with his safety during sex and he's lucky to have; and he has been in an abusive arranged marriage for the past eighteen Years, he's probably not going to be pushing his luck with his dom that much in the first place. plus, blitz is never cowed by him during their conversations- think back to the first phone call right after he stole the book, completely unafraid.
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and for blitz, it's someone trusting him again- but it's also a royal- a blue blood who's nearly untouchable and so much more powerful- who couldn't possibly like a piece of shit like him, apart from the sex he gets out of it. he only flirts once he gets some sort of cue from Stolas; he's desperately trying to view this as only a Goetia trying to get his rocks off, despite all the evidence to the contrary, because anything else is unfathomable to him, no matter how clearly Stolas shows it, because of the ptsd.
both of them thinks the other has the power. both of them aren't expecting the other to keep shut if something's bothering them.
and there's so much conflicting messages from the other too!
stolas calls him a plaything when trying to intimidate the humans; stolas cups his face gently and asks if he's alright
blitz asks him on a date and tells him to get better soon; blitz yells that it's only sex and doesn't reply to his messages
ya see?
bring it to fizzozzie for a second now; even though they do look all good on surface, you can still see fizz's trauma and doubt in all their interactions, they're still forced to keep the relationship secret. do you see his face when Ozzie says in hyperbole that he's never leaving the house again, or when someone accuses him of being a pampered house pet or when he got sexualized in the 7th ep? whatever happened in the interim between the accident with mammon, it fucked him UP. even though oz seems to be well aware of this when he tells him not to apologise and in their general interactions, fizz still visibly has trouble separating plaything/commodity from healthy relationship.
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shout the fuck out to Ozzie btw, man knows whats UP. rooting for these two so much omg.
i forgot where I was going with this point, I'll edit it when i remember. but yeah! lovely fucking relationship, but damn what angst filled issues.
anyway, to sum up- stolitz is not a toxic relationship. the relationship is stuck sludging through misunderstandings and careless microaggressions and trauma responses, but it's not unhealthy or toxic because of the simple reason that most of the current hurt comes from... a misunderstanding. stolas didn't realise blitz would need reassurance about what they were and blitz didn't see stolas as someone who could get hurt.
unecessarily calling it toxic, even online, is more impactful than people think too. almost all spindlehorse ARE on all social medias; so MANY YouTube animators i know have found jobs there; they see your words, especially since a lot don't tag posts with "anti hb" correctly to keep them out of the main tag. there are Very few queer medias made BY queer people that haven't gone through heavy corporate revisions- helluva boss is practically a historical landmark in its success. it's very very very fucking easy to forget that not ten years ago some of the only queer videos on YouTube were butter lover (one kiss at the end post credits), dirty paws and welcome to hell (subtext).
the amount of "critical talk" helluva boss gets for what it is is very unprecedented. it's a beautiful show. can't wait for the next episode.
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davosmymaster · 1 year
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No Time To Die
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TAGS AND WARNINGS - +18, Minors DNI, no explicit smut but sexual themes, whump, a lot of angst, blood, graphic wounds and procedures (?) probably not medically accurate, could be almost gore if you squint, hurt/comfort, two dorks in love, canon-typical violence, near-death experiences. Not based on the game, I don’t know anything about the game and I don’t want spoilers please.
PAIRINGS - Joel Miller x fem!reader
WORD COUNT -  9.6k.
SUMMARY - The main difficulty of being Joel’s closest friend is not falling in love with him, but you still do. Those feelings are buried until you join him on a mission to trade supplies with Bill and Frank. With your life now hanging by a thread, Joel is determined to get you to safety, but the clock is ticking faster than he can run.
A/N - I honestly don’t know what this is. I tried to look for angsty and whumpy fics and couldn’t find any that hit the spot just right; so I wrote my own. This story is set in some time between 2010 and 2020, or so. Bill and Frank are still very much alive. The only warning apart the amount of blood in this, it’s my own knowledge of the English language.
'Breathe'
 With a shiver, you try to comply with your own command. The action itself confuses you, and you don't know where exactly in your mind that thought came from; or why. All you know is that a moment ago you were nothing, absolutely nothing, not even human. You forgot your own existence in a still ocean made of black thick ink. The ink is now backtracking, though, but the remnants of it stay in your foggy mind, clouding it as your consciousness comes back in waves.
 Waking up from a dream is easy, you just come back into yourself from a nice trip to your own imagination. Regaining consciousness, however, is a little more difficult. Instead of going somewhere, you go inwards into yourself. Your overworked mind, already tired and busy with keeping you alive, doesn't care much about bringing you to any other place so you can die peacefully. No. And the awakening is not as it should be either.
Coming back into yourself is your body crawling its way to the land of the living, with your flesh drenched in tears, blood and sweat; and nails digging firmly into the dirt. At least that's how it feels as you go back and forth between the two worlds, rocked violently by the waves threatening to drown you in its heavy never-ending dream.
 You wake up tired, and cold. The first sense that returns is touch; and with it, a pulsing pain radiates from under the right side of your collarbone and all the way down to your chest and back. The —obvious— wound is warmer than the rest of your body. It's like you've grown a second heart right at the borders of the wound; it throbs relentlessly. The second is taste. Your mouth tastes like salt and melted butter; despite not having eaten either in at least three days. Around the dryness of your tongue you feel a sticky liquid swirling around in your mouth, plastered to your gums.
 Whatever it is, you cough it out of your mouth. The old blackened blood splatters on the wooden planks below your mouth. Then, a second later, you feel a sprawled hand on your back; and the rest of your consciousness returns with it.
 He calls your name. And he, whose presence you'd have recognized even blindfolded, even miles away from there, doesn't appear in your mind for a few seconds. But even half-conscious and at death's gates, his name leaves your mouth with a sigh of relief.
 Joel.
 "I'm here," he says, his palm now pressing a bit harder into your back, trying to comfort you somehow. If you had been fully aware, you'd have been embarrassed at the relieved groan that had escaped your lips while saying his name. "How are you feeling?"
 His voice sounds less muffled now, but the pulsing pain intensifies the closer you are to the surface. A second groan escapes your mouth as the warmth under your collarbone becomes impossible to ignore.
 "I know, I know" he says.
 Your eyes flutter open. From your point of view there's not much to see except torn wallpaper, your blood stains, and the shadow of a window. You're on the floor, your cheek pressed against the dusty carpet, your body very still laying on them, and Joel rubbing your back.
 The room is dark. His fingers enter your field of vision, they dip on the wet blood stains and turn around so Joel can see the sticky fluid staining his fingers. He takes a breath, a gasp, really.
 "Goddamnit," he mutters under his breath. His hand stops rubbing your back, and as black stains crawl from the corners of your vision, trying to take you under the waves again, he talks to you:
 "I need to turn you around..." he says with a gentle voice. It's like the icing on top of a sour and burnt cake; he's trying to sound caring, but that doesn't change the fact that it's going to hurt like a bitch. "You hear me?" he says, and his voice breaks for a second. Your ears ring, the next thing he says your brain doesn't process it, your vision has been clouded by darkness again...
 A scream tores your throat as a shooting pain lights your body on fire. It feels like lightning going through your backbone. Suddenly, the waves are very far away and you're feeling way too conscious for your liking. Despite your pain, Joel is still as careful as he can as he lays you on the floor, now facing the ceiling instead.
 The throbbing pain continues, and you blink to get rid of the tears that distort Joel's face. His hand wipes the tears from your face.
 "I know," he says. He has a crease between his seemingly angry eyebrows that you had never seen before.
 Both hands are roaming your ribs now, before you can even say anything. His warm hands give you shivers as he touches your naked skin. The pain is so unbearable that all you can do to mitigate it is hold your breath. If you could move, you'd be right now curled on the floor like a pretzel. You are not crying anymore, but you'd be lying if you said you weren't close.
 "Can you breathe?" he asks then, when he doesn't find any cracks in your ribs by touch alone. You don't respond because you can't find your own voice, and he sounds desperate at this point. "You coughed blood, I need to know if any of your lungs are collapsing."
 "It-it hurts..." you wheeze, your eyes tightly shut. For a split second, you wish you were back to being nothing. Being nothing sounds way better than having a gunshot wound in your chest. The bandages, tight over your bones and shoulder, don't mitigate the pain either. If anything, they worsen it. It feels like a tight sock over a painful pustule on your heel.
 Worst part is you know all this pain is for nothing; you know you won't make it. If you go back to the QZ, you will be executed. If not, there's nobody to help you except Joel. But even if there were doctors or hospitals, you highly doubted you could find the necessary tools to extract a bullet and stitch the wound. That is, if you manage not to die of blood loss.
 "Where?" Joel asks. Even beyond all this concern and well-hidden panic, he seems to cling to an ounce of hope. "Tell me where it hurts."
 Your fingers gently trace your skin until they reach the area under your collarbone, and you sign to your back too. There's a bandage there, but nothing else, and that's when you notice you don't have a shirt on, just your blood-soaked bra.
 "Is it bad?"
 "Not that bad. The bullet went through," he said. That explains the pain on both sides of your body; you have a literal hole in your chest. "And it clotted soon enough to stop the bleeding, but you lost too much blood anyway... Anywhere else?"
 Your whole body hurts and this abandoned house suddenly feels like penance, but you don't want to scare him further, so you shake your head no very slowly.
 "Alright," he mumbles. Joel nods once, and it looks like he is reassuring himself. His eyes betray him, he looks like he is very far away from here, very buried under all the scenes playing on his mind; but despite his stillness, his lower lip quivers.
 You can't move your right arm at all, but with the other hand, your fingers lightly touch his knuckles still resting on your stomach. He winces, and your fingers are wet with his blood too. He must have beaten to death whoever shot you, that you are certain about.
 Your voice, little more than a weak breath, whispers:
 "I-I want you to do it."
 The crease between his eyebrows deepens. He seems confused rather than angry; the reaction you were hoping for. You take a breath to repeat your own words, but he squeezes your hand.
 "Don't," he says.
 "Joel..."
 "Don't even think about it," he snarls. "You are perfectly fine, don't be dramatic."
 You don't know what hurts more; his pain or yours, but his denial makes your eyes wet with tears again. This is already hard, but he is making it even harder. All he will achieve by trying to keep you alive is either prolonging his pain or getting himself killed. You both know this is no world for the injured and the sick, not out of the QZ, at least. And in most cases, not inside either.
 All you ask of him is to not leave you for the infected to find. Is that too much to ask?
 You want to insist, but you know he won't have it. Joel has lost so much already that the thought of losing what little left he has is not even going to cross his mind. Not until it's too late, at least. Also, you don't want your last moments with him to be a fight. You are tired of fighting, of swimming against the current. You just want to let go for once, give in to the external forces, close your eyes and peacefully breathe.
 What's more, you should have already known that he wouldn't do you that favor. He is too selfish for that.
 He pats your cheeks gently with his large hands, and your eyes, already rolling back into your skull, get focused on him again with a few blinks. You breathe slowly, trying to focus on him, on the world around you slowly twisting and turning.
 "...that's it," he says, it doesn't sound like his first sentence, so you guess he's been talking to you before. When you look back at him, his breathing is shallow, and you know he is trying to take a hold of himself too, trying not to give in to panic. "Good girl, that's it. Keep your eyes on me."
 Exhausted and hurting as you are, keeping your eyes open it's like asking you not to drop a weight that you cannot, in fact, handle; but you try nonetheless. It's your fault, really, for letting yourself go, for trying to give up on your fight earlier than you should. Joel is here trying to keep you alive, mending all your broken ends and stitching them together —he has always been good at that— while you're just trying to give up on him —you are really good at that too—.
 Giving up on Joel has been one of the hardest things you've ever had to do; and now you're letting him go for the last time. Part of you is glad you don't have to keep watching how he chooses Theresa over and over again. You are even relieved that fate —or whatever there is out there— is forcing you out of the equation. After all, you would never have given up fully on him.
 He refuses to kill you, what he doesn't know is that you've been dead for a long while now. Him being your executioner would be the kindest act he could have with you, the most intimate thing you'd ever share; your last moments. You want it to be him, you want him to free you from this torment.
 He refuses, though; and it feels like a punch to the pit of your stomach. You shiver.
 He gets up from his place on the floor, where you are lying just over the carpet. You follow him with your eyes and see a fire cracking up in a fucked-up chimney. He stokes the fire, throws some more wood on it and then comes back to you, covering you with his jacket, the very same jacket you had on before he turned you around. It's warm, his, and you have to stop yourself from sinking your nose into the collar.
 "I had to take off your shirt to patch you up," he says, but he doesn't say sorry. Ever. So you guess it's his way of apologizing.
 You simply nod, aware that you had wished for this very moment to happen many times before. You had dreamt of his rough hands over your naked flesh, caressing the sides of your body. You had dreamt of him watching you with those chocolate eyes as you took your shirt off, deep black pupils spreading over the brown as he watched the lace fall like a helpless witness.
 But now the bra was covered in blood and he was watching you anywhere but the lace. He had a frightened and concerned look on his face, rather than aroused. A look that would have made you feel guilty and ashamed if it had happened in the other scenario. And instead of undressing you, he was covering your body with his jacket as if you were his child.
 "What's wrong?" he is asking now, instead of whispering 'I want you' and it hurts all the same to know he's not ever going to say it, and that Tess now will have all those words for however long their lives are.
 You guess they were made for each other. And it makes all the sense, really, no one like Joel would ever look at you twice. You were grateful that he even allowed you to be his friend.
 "Nothing," you respond.
 It's always 'nothing' when it comes to Joel. It's always that nothing whenever he notices you are under the weather. It's always nothing when you are hurt, when someone tries to rob you and they leave an angry black eye on your face. It's always nothing; and he never believes you.
 "I don't make promises, you know that," he says, taking your left hand in his. "but you will be fine, I swear."
 You don't know what to say, how to explain that you are not scared of death, that you are just scared of not seeing him again. But you can't, so you say nothing and just nod.
 Does he want to hurt himself? Okay. You can't do much while lying on the floor anyway.
 After that, both of you stay silent. Joel seems to be avoiding looking at you. His eyes are stuck in the fire creaking in the chimney, but they are too restless to be present and conscious of the yellow and orange haze.
 Your palm lands on his thigh, your fingers gently brushing the denim. You want to comfort him somehow, but, at the same time, you are scared he will reject your touch and reassurance. That's all you can do for him: no words, no further touching, just a featherlight touch that indicates you are still present. There, with him.
 "I thought we couldn't make a fire."
 "Don't be dumb. The windows are all broken, it's winter and you are in shock. How else would you heat up?"
 "Got it. You're not in a talking mood," you huff. "Alright."
 Silence settles between both of you. However, one of his big, rough hands travels to where your fingertips are gently brushing his thigh. At the touch, even if you don't want to let go, your fingers begin to back off. He's not in a good mood, and you seem to be pushing his boundaries a little too much. Except that, instead of letting you go, he catches your hand in his and puts it back over his jean. This time, it's him who brushes his thumb over your knuckles.
 For a minute, the only sound in the living room are both your breathing patterns, the flames licking the air and the wind rushing through the broken windows.
 "I'm sorry..." you start. And immediately, his brown eyes are all over you again. Your voice sounds exhausted, more than you'd have liked. "...I fucked up the mission. I know-"
 "You haven't fucked up anything," he interrupts. That's Joel, all stoic, swallowing his feelings and denying everything that it is not up to his standards. "Would you mind to just rest-"
 Your eyes well with tears.
 "Joel, for once... Just for once, don't lecture me, don't ignore what I'm trying to say just because you don't want to hear it," you tell him. Then, he thankfully presses his lips together in a pained grimace, but stays silent nonetheless. "I fucked up the mission getting injured. I know it isn't my fault, but it doesn't matter whose fault it is. If you wanna go on without me, I won't blame you."
 His fingers are now squeezing yours, but you know he is not even conscious of that. He leans in a little, his cheeks now reddened in anger. He looks like he is about to spit on your face.
 "I'm not leaving you anywhere," he says. He looks offended that you even thought he was capable of that. "You and I are gonna get to Lincoln, either if you like it or not. There, Bill and Frank will help you. We have traded all kinds of things with them, and I know they are very well supplied."
 "Why would they help me?"
 "They are not just people we trade with," he says. His fingertips brush a strand of hair out of your face. "I know they will."
 "What if they changed their minds?"
 His pupils lock into your own, his jawline swells as he grits his teeth.
 "I'm persistent."
 The mission was supposed to be an easy one. Walk out of the QZ undetected, walk fifteen miles to the town of Lincoln, just outside Boston, get our things and come back. Our cargo were the two last spools of aluminum that Joel had promised to trade with them and two packets of seeds. Theirs? Two pounds of rolling tobacco and a gun. Tess couldn't make it, she had appointments with other smugglers, probably the ones who snuck the drugs in; which was more than half of their business. If it wasn't that important, she wouldn't have stayed in the QZ for anything in the world. But Bill and Frank were also important, and Joel couldn't go alone.
 The two of you should be home by now, and you wondered if Tess was regretting her decision of asking you to go with him. Last night you had both snuck out of the Boston QZ; and it usually didn't take more than six hours to get to Lincoln. But just outside the city you had bumped into raiders; and a stray bullet had hit you. Now you were stranded in a small cabin lost in the woods, about seven miles away from Lincoln; and unable to walk a single step.
 And to top it all off, Joel was enraged and neurotic.
 Still with the same expression, he takes your wrist and squeezes two fingers into it. Even if you had preferred him not to, knowing that your heartbeat got wild whenever he was around. You let him check on you, hoping that if your symptoms got better he would let you have a quick nap. Your nervousness, however, doesn't improve despite your efforts of trying to calm yourself down.
 "Since when are you a doctor?"
 He lets your wrist go, then gets back on his feet and gets his rifle.
 "You should rest. You'lll need it," he says, now heading to the entrance. He's gonna be standing on guard all night, you are sure of that. "We're leaving tomorrow morning."
 That is when you lose it. You can't believe he is that blind, that caught up in his own world.
 "I know in your perfect fantasy this is just a scratch, but I truly can't move, Joel. Even laying here awake is hard. How am I supposed to follow...? Joel!"
 But he's out of the house before you even finish the sentence.
  [***]
  Joel doesn't keep his word.
 A few hours later, not even near dawn yet, you get pulled back from a dream. Your eyes take a few minutes to register your surroundings; again. And the memories gallop back to your mind in a rush; accompanied by the burning and piercing pain on the upper right side of your chest. Your eyes shut tight, and you inhale a shallow breath. Even breathing hurts.
 "We need to go," Joel whispers. His voice sounds muffled, especially over the sound of your beating heart. "C'mon, wake up."
 He is once again rocking you rather than shaking you awake. Just to be able to fall asleep you had rolled back into your chest, cheek once again firmly pressed against that twenty-year-old dusty carpet. When he came back from checking the perimeter, not even five minutes after your argument, he placed his backpack right under your stomach so your right side was elevated. You wouldn't have been able to fall asleep if it wasn't for that. The pain was maddening, atrociously painful. Joel had found you gritting your teeth even in your sleep.
 He had said you'd leave the next day, but you felt like not even minutes had passed.
 "Morning," you complained, half a grunt accompanying your words. Joel shook you gently again when he saw you relax a second time, and your voice came back. "Y-you said...mor-"
 "I know what I said but we can't wait any longer," he answered. "I'm gonna sit you up."
 Fear pumped enough adrenaline into your system to wake you up. The ache from before rushed back into your mind, and your 'please' and 'wait' left your mouth like a prayer.
 "I can do it," you said, but it sounded more like begging than an affirmation.
 "I know you can," he lied. As your eyes opened and you saw his expression —eyes focused on you, trembling hands, half of his face hidden in the shadows, the other half gently licked by the orange-like haze of the dying fire— you understood that you had to be in a really bad condition for him to look at you that way, and feel the need to lie to make you feel better. But then, a second right after that, his shoulders relaxed, his eyes fluttered between your face and the surface of his jacket over your shoulders. His stoic mask was back on. "I'm just gonna help you, okay? But you do it."
 He did not, in fact, let you do it.
 You had managed to lift yourself barely an inch over the carpet, using all the strength left in your healthy arm, when both his hands curled around your side and pulled you up to his chest. Clenching your jaw, you allowed him to drag you a few feet back and into a seating position against the wall; your whole weight over the left side of your body.
 "Don't lean on the other side, your shoulder blade is broken."
 "Oh..." you almost chuckled. "Great."
 For a second, Joel looks at you as if you were completely insane. He reaches for his backpack, crouching on the place where you were lying just seconds prior. Then takes his flask and doubts when passing it on.
 "I'm not that desperate for water," you respond, reaching for the flask and drinking a gulp of the liquid. You swallow despite the soreness in your throat. "Next thing you'll do is spit food into my mouth."
 "Not even getting shot shuts your fucking mouth, does it?" he says, grossed out at your comment. However, a smile tugs at the corners of his lips. Relaxing him has a calming effect on you too.
 You try to pass him the flask again, but he refuses.
 "No," he says. "Drink it all. You'll need it."
 You look at him with narrowed eyes, confused. It's hard to keep a single thought in your head other than the throbbing pain in your chest and back, but you still try. Rather than asking him how you are supposed to walk seven miles, with the aluminum and his pack, you try to approach the matter another way.
 "What's the plan?"
 He takes a deep breath.
 "You're not gonna like it," he says, his deep voice almost slurring the words. It's barely a whisper. He looks into your eyes, then. "I'm gonna carry you."
 "What?"
 "You heard me."
 There's not an ounce of doubt in his eyes. Joel has that look of determination, the one you only really see when he has his eyes set on something really fucking important for him; most times that includes his own brother or not talking about the times before the outbreak. And with that look on his face, you know there's nothing you could possibly say or do to make him reconsider his own words. He's stubborn like that.
 You still try.
 "It's seven miles, Joel..." you tell him on a thready voice, a whisper. And Joel sighs through his nose —as if he had forgotten. "And we have to carry..."
 "We leave everything here," he says. "Come back for it later."
 "They won't let us in empty-handed."
 "You don't know them."
 For Joel to be so certain about it, certain enough as to put both your life and his on the hands of strangers; you understand that their relationship goes beyond trading. Joel had told you about them, about their situation and the first time Tess and him had shared dinner with Bill and Frank. Still, you were suspicious of them, and you thought that he was too; up until now, at least.
 "It's still seven miles," you tell him, and you know him, you know he's about to stop talking to you and leave the room if you don't, at least, partly give in to his reasoning. "...are you sure you wanna do it?"
 His pleading brown eyes engulf you, then, with an emotion he had never showed before. His gaze diverts for a second to your wound, to the bandages that, as you look at them, you find they are once again covered in blood. They are soaked in it, the skin surrounding it has a large black bruise —internal bleeding, you guess. And when you try to take a full deep breath, you find yourself unable to, at least not at full capacity.
 The understanding hits you, then. You don't have much time left.
 "I don't have any other choice," Joel says, but what he means is 'I don't want to lose you'.
 "Okay."
 Not even a full second has passed from your reluctant acceptance, but he is already on his feet. Joel walks to the only table in the room, takes your gun and puts it in his hip, right inside the jean. The only other thing he takes apart from ammo is another set of bandages —and he silently thanks whatever it is out there that he put those there a month ago—. He doesn't have anything to clean the wound, though; and one of his biggest fears is that it might already be infected. Even bandaged it looks bad.
 He approaches you, crouches down so he is facing the wound.
 "I'm going to tighten the bandage, and I have to keep the pressure," he says, loosening the knot. His fingers are once again stained with you blood, and he has to fight the images of him pressing on your wound from a few hours ago, when he had found you and, with trembling hands, had tried to stop the bleeding coming out in waves. He looks at you, trying to forget the awful picture of your eyes closed, your body limp on the ground. "Bite something."
 You reach for the sleeve of his jacket, the one hanging from your shoulders; and put the padded cuff of his jacket into your mouth.
 Joel doesn't give you a warning; and you're not sure if that's a good or bad thing, either. He presses the heel of his hand right over the covered hole in your chest, with such strength that you wonder if he will end up breaking your clavicle in half. As he presses your body against the wall, you can almost feel the cracked bones in your back smashing against each other.
 Needless to say, the pain is blinding. The view of the room, the feeling of his heat around you, the scent of him under your nose... all gone in a matter of seconds. Your vision turns white, all your senses stop functioning. Over the scream that falls from your lips, muffled by the jacket, you hear him say:
 "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."
 He lets go, and your vision immediately darkens, the shadows flowing from the corners of the room quick to reach you. With your last grip on reality you feel yourself melting against the wall, slowly slipping to the side. Joel catches you before you hit the floor.
 Cold water is what brings you back. Your breathing quickens at the coldness of it, and the next thing you feel are his wet hands palming your cheeks, throwing water from his flask all over your face.
 "C'mon," he mumbles. "I need you awake."
 Your eyes flutter open, your whole body relaxed now that he's not applying pressure; but alert enough that your unfocused eyes make a single shape out of him.
 While coming back into yourself, Joel does not have any time to lose. He takes his jacket over your shoulders and slips your left arm inside the sleeve, the other, where the wound is, he decides to leave it as it is; and buttons it over your chest so you're not exposed.
 "You good?"
 In any other situation you'd have said some joke, or just something to piss him off. But as of right now, nothing comes to your clouded mind; and even if something did come, you're too exhausted to even do the mental effort to say it. So you just nod.
 "Okay," he nods too, talking to himself inside his head, then takes your face in his hands and looks into your eyes. "You're fine, you hear me? I'm gonna carry you and you're gonna be on my back; so I need you talking all the damn time, alright?
 You nod again.
 "Starting now."
 "Y-yes... okay."
 "Good," he says. His hand crawls to the back of your neck, and he joins both your foreheads. He takes quick breaths. He's terrified when he whispers. "You're doing so good. I'm so proud of you."
 "Y-you... are?"
 "Mm-hmm," he says. And as his words settle into your brain, you feel your chest warm. When you open your eyes and he separates, there's a tear on his cheek, but he's quick to wipe it off. "I'm gonna open the front door."
 It's just an excuse, you both know it, but neither dares to say anything. None of you wants to talk about the elephant in the room, the fact that your chances are slim even if this works.
 Joel returns quickly, with his lashes wet and reddened eyes. It makes you speechless, to know that all this effort and tears are for you. You'd have never, in a million years, thought you'd ever see Joel Miller cry; let alone for you. He had always been so quiet, so detached from everyone, even from Tess.
 Without a word, his hands get hooked on the underside of your thighs. He lifts you up, seemingly effortlessly, and your inner thighs surround his hips. You take a deep breath, again —or at least try to— as you try not to blush and show those feelings you buried long ago. This is not the time, nor the place; so you allow your head to follow his range of motion; forwards. Soon, your nose is pressed against the lapels of his denim shirt. With your good arm, you grab one of his broad shoulders. The other falls limp, and even that little movement hurts like hell.
 He freezes, his shoulders now stiff under your hand. His beard grazes your jaw as he tries to look at you, so still in his arms.
 "You okay?"
 "Yeah..."
 Better than okay, you want to respond. Better than I've been in a long time. But you don't.
 He leaves you on the table, on the edge, with your legs dangling.  His eyes waver for a second as he leaves you there, his hands squeeze your knees in such a brief movement that you wonder if he was even conscious of that. He looks like he wants to say something, but he can't think of what, so he turns around and bends his knees a little to get you to a good height.
 "I need you to push yourself up with your good arm," he instructs. "and keep the other still, okay?"
 "Okay," you respond, fighting the urge to just nod instead.
 Not even following his instructions to a t saves you from the pain. The effort, even with your arm limp in the air, makes your body shudder and an agonizing stab runs through your whole spine. The scream that tores from the depths of your throat is so intense that Joel hesitates to put you back on the table, his back trembles for a second as his body shivers in distress. But, in the end, he has you in the air with a good hold.
 He waits, but doesn't hear anything except shallow breaths, doesn't feel anything but the weight of your head over his shoulder.
 "You with me?" he asks. He is seconds away from aborting the mission.
 "Y-yeah..."
 Your arm surrounds his neck loosely. Your fist is closed tightly, grabbing the other shoulder, and he wishes he could touch you, give you some kind of comfort, but he can't let go from his grip under your knees.
 Joel does not have the privilege of time, every second is precious, so not even giving it a try, he starts walking as if you weighted nothing. He crosses the front door and the freezing cold wind of the East Coast cuts your cheeks. If he notices —and you know that he has, wearing just his shirt in the middle of the night— he doesn't react.
 "Remember what I told you?" he asks.
 In less than a minute he has crossed the space from the cabin to the highway, where you were surprised by raiders. You look around, see the bodies of five men sprawled on the floor; lifeless, drowning in a pool of their own blood. One of them has his face mauled to nothing. The sight is so sickening —or maybe you are getting so ill— that a sudden dizziness takes hold of your shivering body.
 "Hey..."
 "I'm sorry..." you start, teeth chattering from the cold. "I'm sorry I screamed into your ear earlier."
 A sound, half a relieved sigh and half a chuckle, leaves his mouth.
 "I'm half deaf from that ear anyway."
 A light chuckle falls from your lips too. Joel keeps walking west through the highway, and you keep yourself desperately clinging to him for dear life. The moon is your only other companion; without her, you both would be completely blind in the darkness of the night.
  [***]
  Joel probably hadn't thought about the possibility of taking breaks along the way. That's why, fourty-five minutes later, and under a beautiful sunrise of orange tones, he's struggling to keep going. His knees are screaming for him to stop, his biceps and hands tired of walking with a person's weight over his shoulders. And for the first time in years he remembers the times before the outbreak, when he was capable of lifting and moving huge pieces of furniture; often times on his own, other times with just Tommy.
 He might have overestimated his own strength, assuming he was as strong as before. But it seems that not only his mental health has deteriorated after Sarah's death, no. All of him has become older and darker and more broken since then. He hardly recognizes himself in the mirror anymore.
 "Joel?"
 "Yeah..." he gasps, out of air. "Sorry, I got distracted. You were saying...?"
 It is in moments like this that he hates not to be that same person he was before. He wonders if he is, finally, paying for his past sins, for all the people, infected or not, that he has killed.
It is unfair, the fact that you're paying for his piper.
 "You should stop for a while," you tell him, your voice low like a whisper. The warm air from your mouth slithers across his skin, up his neck, over his ear, and almost sends a shiver down his spine.
 "No."
 "Joel..." you huff. Before speaking again, you take a big gulp of air. "We are not getting anywhere if you don't take breaks. You'll just wear yourself off before we reach the halfway mark."
 His mind refuses to agree, but it's as if his body takes a relieved breath when he hears the words. Little by little, his body starts to listen to you before his mind does. His thighs are screaming, sore from the pain of exertion; and before he acknowledges, even, his body has stopped moving.
 "Okay," he gasps, quick tired breaths quickly entering and leaving his lungs. "...but just a minute, we don't have time for this bullshit."
 "Okay," you say, in the same tone he used earlier with you; when he lied and said he knew you could sit up on your own. "Just a minute."
 He pulls to the side of the road, and with the last of his strength he kneels down and tries to lay you on the ground as carefully as possible. You fall on your ass on the wet ground, but at least you don't hurt yourself on the spot. He asks you for the millionth time in the last twenty-four hours if you are okay.
 "I think I'm doing better than you," you respond, but your voice is so exhausted that Joel would love to just lay next to you and lull you to sleep.
 He turns around, his whole weight sitting on the grass as he takes gulps of oxygen. His eyes shut tightly, he wipes off a tear of sweat from his temple and looks at you.
 Wide-open eyes stare back at you, but just for a split second. He gets closer, his thumb brushing the shoulder of the brown jacket, his brown jacket. His eyes pierce yours.
 "Are you sure?"
 "That bad do I look?"
 Joel doesn't look at you, not at your face getting paler by the second or the dark circles under your eyes, or your hair now dishevelled. He sees you on his memories and can barely recognize you; your skin and eyes always glowing under the sun, your hair always perfectly done. Your job was often to act as an HR for their clients, and very rarely took actual FEDRA jobs that stained your hands; you weren't like Joel, you didn't care about rations or money or whatever.
 Expert fingers gently tug at the buttons, unbuttoning them so he could take a look to the wound. He had barely a glimpse of it when your fingers stopped his hands. Joel looks at you with those puppy eyes, as if you were about to faint in the next second.
 "If you wanted to see me naked you didn't have to wait until I got shot, you know?"
 You had said it in a playful manner, kidding, as a joke; but he saw beyond that. Part of you had only expected him to laugh, the other was dying —not pun intended— for him to kiss you. You'd have never said it if you weren't in this position, you'd have never gotten in between Joel and Tess.
 However, he didn't laugh, didn't make any funny remark. The way he looked at you, from under his eyebrows, lit a spark of hope somewhere inside you. Deep, deeper than your conscious mind would have ever reached. Joel didn't say anything, not even chuckled. His eyes came back to the wound, and uncovered the full sight of it.
 He had to fight a shocked gasp. His eyes fluttered, while holding his breath, between your own face and the wound. The bandage was still soaked in blood, that he had expected, but not the large bruise growing into your neck; or your right hand slightly paler than the other. He lifted, with trembling fingers, a corner of the bandage, and his action caused a trickle of dark blood to gush out, as if he had crushed a piece of watermelon between his fingers and it was now running down his arm. He looked below, inside his jacket, and saw a trail of blood that landed right into your navel.
 This time, it was impossible for him not to react. Not only his face, but also his body. He tried to get back on his two feet again, but before he finished the action, your fist closed around his wrist.
 "Joel..." he heard you call.
 "We need to go, now."
 Pressing your lips in a sad smile, you pulled him to the ground and he sat, mesmerised on that face he had only yet seen once; that time when he got too drunk on a Friday night and told you about Sarah at three in the morning. He felt his pulse quicken, his heart beating at the ends of his fingertips.
 "It's okay," you told him. Your gentle touch brushed his palm, danced around over his tan skin. "You can rest."
 Joel felt like he was in a fever dream. The setting certainly felt like it. You hadn't left the Boston QZ in a long while, and he had never pictured you out of those big silver walls either. He had not agreed to Tess' idea either, the dangers beyond the walls were almost impossible to escape. Still, Tess and him knew the city, they could get out fairly easily, had done that for a couple years to share stories over dinner with Bill and Frank. And Joel had loved the idea of seeing you sitting at that dinner table next to him, surrounded by a garden full of flowers, going through the dresses in the boutique that Tess had sworn you'd love.
 He had not signed up for this.
 "We need to go, please..." he tried a second time, but you just shook your head. He understood, somehow, what you meant.
 "A minute won't make a difference," you told him. In reality, you wanted to tell him that you'd be dead when he got the both of you to Lincoln, anyway. "If you are tired we will never get there."
 Useless and powerless as he felt, his only option was waiting. He took your hand, intertwined his fingers with yours and took a deep breath. You had never seen him so upset.
 "What are you so scared of?"
 At your words, his lower lip quivered slightly; it would almost have gone unnoticed if it wasn't because you had been watching him attentively for so many years. He looked at you, eyes barely half open, from under his eyelashes.
 "You're very important to me," he said. His tongue felt heavy in his mouth, he seemed to be even more breathless than he was before. Joel had a hard time admitting his feelings, even to himself. "I don't know if you understand to what extent you're important to me."
 "I know..." you answered, nodding, your hand squeezed his for a second, trying to give him strength. "But you have Tess home, and your brother loves you... It will hurt for a while..."
 "Shut. Up."
 His eyes were tightly shut when he said it. It was a metaphor, almost, the way his eyes were closed not just to the physical world, but to the whole situation too that he couldn't escape from.
 The tip of your tongue wetted your lips.
 "What I'm trying to say is... it will pass..."
 His chest heaved, his gaps the only sound that filled the space between the two of you. And you continued:
 "People die all the time, Joel; and most times we can't do anything about it."
 His body rushed at you, his hands locked perfectly on both your cheeks, like two pieces of a jigsaw puzzle finally in place.
 "Not you, you hear me? Not you," he almost growled, his face a mixture of anger, determination, and grief. "Never you. You're not allowed to leave me. I will never forgive you."
 There was something hidden between the lines, something Joel wasn't saying. It was something you had denied yourself for a long time, for years, something you had insisted on not seeing because you didn't want to see it. Because, deep down, you were afraid that Joel would never love you back, that he would break your heart, that the only good man you'd ever known inside the walls of the Boston QZ would also be the one to abandon you to your luck.
 Joel had been your family for so long, and you had unconsciously protected yourself from seeing him as something else. But now there it was, clearly, latent in his confession. Your punishment for years of silence was now time, or rather, the lack of it.
 "I'm not giving up," he said. "and I need you not to give up either."
 He's close. His hot breath smells sweet -so instinctively Joel- and it's all around your face. His flesh is warm over the freezing skin of your cheeks. His body around you is shelter, is home.
 Joel is soon leaning in. He's all erratic breathing, rapid heartbeat and trembling hands; and as you close your eyes to allow his presence to swallow you like a black hole, he closes his eyes too.
 He doesn't let go, not just yet. He breathes in into your quick breaths the same way you revel in his.
 "I need an answer," he whispers over your mouth.
 "I won't, either."
 At first it's like a collision. He kisses you angrily for a split second, demanding and impatient; then, once he knows this is really happening, once he does understand that this is —finally— not a dream, he relaxes into your touch, your fingers delineating his jawline, caressing the beard there.
 He's quick, quicker than you'd have expected him to be; definitely quicker then he would have liked. He separates, then; and looks down at his jacket and the drops of blood staining the insides of it. It's not enough blood to send you into shock again, but it means part of the wound is ripping. You need stitches, not just a couple of bandages.
 "Enough resting then," he says.
   [***]
 Seven miles is usually nothing for Joel. In the first few months trading with Bill and Frank, Tess and him usually walked the fifteen miles that separated the city and the town at least twice a month. But this is all the more difficult, not just carrying you there, but knowing that he is running out of time.
 And you seem hellbent on making the journey even more difficult.
 "So...Tess?"
 "Pass."
 You huff, and the warm air sends a shiver down his spine; but he says nothing.
 "Okay."
 Your voice sounds so disappointed that he feels a pang of guilt. You know him better than to insist, and he knows that too. The guilt increases, though; and now he's inhaling a big gulp of air while still walking as fast as he possibly can without hurting his own knees.
 "We fucked a few times, before," he says. "but that doesn't mean anything. She's my colleague. That's all."
 If he was better with words, and feelings, he could say that he didn't feel anything for her. He could say that their hookups were nothing, just a fun thing they used to do before, before he realized that the one who he really wanted was you. A few months back he had realized that it never actually satisfied him, that those moments with Tess weren't as fun and innocent as they seemed to be before. They had talked about it, of course. He didn't want to play with her feelings, and that had been the end of it. She was just as fine without him, anyway.
 "I thought you two were dating."
 "If selling drugs for a living is what you call dating, then yes."
 Without even looking at you, he knew you were smiling, he could almost feel your lips stretching over his shirt.
 "I..." you said, then he heard you take another deep breath before talking again. "I'm sorry I asked you," another breath. "I... ran out of things to say."
 His brow furrowed in confusion.
 "You can say anything," he says. "Anything you really like, even a story."
 Anything just to know you're there...
 "Well..." you started. Then, a wheezing noise filled the air, followed by a gasp. "I... liked rock music-" silence. "...back in the day."
 "You okay?"
 Your fist tightened around his shoulder, your forehead pressing against his trapezius. He heard that wheezing sound again, followed by a pant. His hands squeezed harder the tender flesh under her knees.
 Joel tried to look at her, but all he could see from his peripheral vision was the top of her head and one eye tightly closed. His throat turned into knots.
 "Baby..." that was the most gentle tone you had ever heard coming from his mouth. "C'mon baby. Hold on, we're almost there."
 His whole body felt paralyzed, and he had to force himself to keep walking.
 What he didn't know was that your lungs were burning. They felt like a pair of balloons squeezing against your ribs, trying to expand beyond its cage. And it made all the pain in your back, from the shot, double as painful. The air you tried to swallow so bad, sounded like a whistle, like the breeze through an almost closed window. You were suffocating.
 "Talk to me, c'mon."
 With a painful drag of air, you complied.
 "I can't..." your fist tightened around the fabric of his shirt. "I can't."
 "Goddamnit..." he was panicking now. "Okay, that's okay baby. Just hold on to me, don't let go."
 Unable to do anything else, you just nodded as best you could and kept on holding on to him. His eyes desperately looked for signs of the town, and far away, in the distance, the row of trees ended; and he walked faster, hoping that Bill had already seen the both of you through the cameras.
 "J-Joel"
 You struggled to find air, and, therefore, the words.
 "Easy, easy" he said. "Just a bit more. You can do it, I know you can."
 His words lingered in the air, unanswered, not even him fully believed them. Joel was starting to feel his own shirt wet with blood from your wound. The feeling made him sick, his own imagination as he pictured what Bill was watching through the cameras, made it all a hundred times worse.
 He kept hearing the panting, the wheezing, becoming more desperate by the second. He realized, with horror, that you were suffocating righ there, on his back; from a collapsing lung, he guessed.
 He shouted Bill's name as he saw the fence that separated them from the town. Joel wasn't sure if he could hear him, but tried anyway.
 He felt your grip on his shirt hesitate, and he had to fight the instinct to squeeze your hand; if he had done it, you'd have fallen from his own grip. He heard you try and say his name.
 "Save it," he responded, even if it came out not as reassuring as he would have liked. "Don't try to talk."
 Before he reached the fence, it was already opening. Bill came out running, yelling something that he was too distracted to distinguish, Frank came behind him. Joel felt his knees wobble once through the gate. And now kneeling on the floor, he called your name, tried to turn his head to take a glimpse of you.
 "You did it. We're here."
 He noticed, then, that everything seemed all too silent. Everything that happened after that, happened very quickly. The hand that had been gripping his shirt slipped, limp over his shoulder.
 His mind disconnected, completely unaware of the other two people approaching. He released you with all the care that a person could have had, and his arms immediately caught you in an embrace. The sight of your closed eyes made him panic, and not having even checked your pulse, he buried his face into your neck and sobbed.
 Trails of blood ran through his forearms, and he threw up all the words that passed through his mind; a string of 'please stay' and 'I'm sorry'.
 "Joel," Frank struggled with him, fingers digging into his shoulder. "Joel you have to let go. Let us help her."
 He was too far gone, so much so that once your body hit the floor, Frank didn't allow him to touch you again. He sobbed, and, for a second, Bill saw himself in him. He would have never thought he would see Joel in this state, but yet there he was. He kept pressure on the wound, and saw himself in Joel, and Frank in you; and promised he would never let this happen to the two of them.
 Never.
  [***]
  The sun comes out the next morning. As it always does, as it always has. Orange light and blue skies illuminate the room, the clouds shine a different color; and Joel blinks; absolutely exhausted, devastated.
 His body is heavy, even if he's not holding any of his weight. He's sitting on the cold tiles, on the floor, his sore knees and thighs in the space under the bed, his head lying on the mattress, his whole body is bent over and it feels like jelly. His eyes are the only thing moving, they look at the window and see the night sky turn into daylight.
 Joel couldn't possibly say that he slept in that position; because he didn't actually sleep. He hasn't had a second of sleep since you got shot two days ago. Lying on the bed, is you, dormant; and his thumb draws circles on the back of you hand even if he's not paying attention to it. It comforts him to a degree, at least.
 Suddenly, pretty much everything has lost its meaning. Frank opens the door an hour later, almost tripping with the tray of food and water that he left the night before for Joel. He hasn't touched any of it. In fact, he forgot about it, but if it bothers him, Frank doesn't say anything. He takes it in his hands so he can take it to the kitchen downstairs.
 "We played 'I will survive' in the radio" he whispers before leaving. "It's a 70s song, but Tess will get the meaning."
 "Thank you," he mutters, his mouth pasty from barely speaking in the last twenty-four hours. Funnily enough, the only word he's said to them is 'thank you'.
 "You're welcome, Joel," he says. After a few seconds, waiting, he makes a dissatisfied sound. Frank approaches Joel, his palm squeezing his shoulder. "You should eat something, at least. Is there anything you want?"
 Joel looks at him, lifting his cheek from the mattress for the first time. His eyes are blood-shot and black circles adorn his eyes.
 "Coffee."
 "Not coffee, you need sleep."
 He huffs, his eyes lost in the window again. Frank, knowing he won't get anything from him again, vanishes behind the door and into the kitchen. He will bring him warm food later, hoping the smell will make him eat something despite his unwillingness to listen to any signal of hunger from his own body.
 A few moments later, your hand slips from his. As he loses your touch, a pang hits the pit of his stomach. But then, as he lifts from the mattress again, your fingertips lightly touch his chin, your thumb lovingly brushing his beard.
 "Baby?"
 Maybe he lost his sense of time, because he didn't expect you to wake up yet. In any case, when he sees your eyes open he practically pounces on the bed. He sits on the edge, and swallows the image of you looking at him.
 "Morning."
 He smiles at your words, feels his strength coming back into his body.
 "You're here," he says.
 Even beaten up as you look, he thinks you are gorgeous. Your face has regained its usual color, the bruising is coming down, changing colors little by little, the wound is stitched and bandaged, and the blood flow seems to reach your fingertips normally once again. Joel has no idea how Bill fixed the collapsing lung, he had said something about medical knowledge being necessary in the field too, but he hadn't paid attention. He doesn't care about the details, though. He just cares that you're safe and sound, and despite the close call, that has seemed to be the end result to this whole dilemma.
 There's no blood in sight, not even in the bandages. Frank had washed the blood from your hair the day before, and Joel had helped with the rest. He wished he could have you like this everyday: happy, clean, safe...
 In the last few hours Joel had discovered he was jealous. He wished he had a town like Lincoln all to himself, just so he could see you picking flowers in the front garden.
 "I'm here," you told him. The words felt like strawberries in his mouth. "and I'm not giving up on you."
 He released a breath he didn't know he was holding, leaned in for both your foreheads to meet, and kissed you.
4K notes · View notes
jeonstellate · 3 months
Text
my future in your eyes
mingyu still holds onto you, even after all this time.
๑彡 kim mingyu x gender neutral!reader
๑彡 divorced!au/ex-husband!au, post-break up!au, exes-to-lovers!au — fluff
๑彡 paragraph format — 1.1K words
masterlist
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[gif’s full credit belongs solely to its owner]
๑彡 title is taken from zack tabudlo’s as you are.
๑彡 i’m lowk proud of this ngl bc— it’s fluff, but it took me relatively quick to finish?? usually i get stuck for weeks if the wip’s fluff ><
Kim Mingyu is a man of confidence.
Not that he uses his confidence to swindle strangers, as the dictionary suggests the title means. Rather, he exudes confidence — regardless of what he does.
There is always an air confidence around him. He can be in clothes that don’t fit the event’s theme and he’ll still seem perfectly dressed. He can be barely conversant in another language and he’ll still sound like he knows what he’s saying. He can just be standing there, doing nothing, and he’ll still appear like he’s doing something right.
Some people mistake his confidence for arrogance. Most find it admirable. But, in truth, Mingyu hardly cares.
Especially if his so-called confidence vanishes whenever you are in the vicinity and within his line of sight. Just like now.
He sees you in a table with Seokmin. Your back is towards him but he recognizes you, anyway. Despite the distance, he has no problem witnessing how animatedly you talk with your common friend.
It’s almost like he is back in college: you and Seokmin in one row, him and Minghao a few rows back. He can almost hear Minghao state matter-of-factly, "You’re staring," like he often does back then.
Really, all that’s different is Minghao’s currently preoccupied being the groom to comment on his staring. (There are definitely more things that are different now, but he doesn’t want to even begin thinking about them.)
Seokmin catches his stare. Not soon after, specifically before Mingyu can even look away, he sees him leave the table. Seokmin throws him a familiar meaningful look before disappearing into the dance floor.
Truth be told, Mingyu’s confidence comes naturally. It isn’t something that he purposely channels. It’s just always there . . . unless you are involved. Then, suddenly, he has to painstakingly gather the confidence to be near you.
"Is this seat taken?" He tries his hardest to mask his awestruck look with one of kind politeness as he waits your response.
He almost forgot how to breathe when your eyes lock into his. "You may sit if you wish," you offer him a small, polite smile. "I don’t think he’ll be back anytime soon."
"Thanks." He effortlessly returns your gesture before situating himself on the chair your common friend abandoned. "How are you enjoying the party?"
"Really well, actually. I didn’t expect to recognize a lot of people from college." Your eyes don’t leave his as you answer. He tries not to stare back too intently, to look within your eyes to see something . . . anything. "And you?"
Mingyu waits for a beat, gathering enough confidence to say what he wants to. "Better now that you’re here." With me.
He lets out a barely audible embarrassed laugh. He has half a mind to take it back, but quickly changes his mind when he sees you biting your lower lip — an obvious attempt to stop yourself from laughing.
A ghost of a smile plays on his lips. There’s pride in knowing he’s still able to make you laugh, despite it being your first meeting in literal years.
You look down in a presumable attempt to calm yourself down. He doesn’t take his eyes off of you, though, as he refuses to lose you from his sight. As such, he immediately notices the sudden shift in your expression.
"You’re still wearing it." Mingyu follows your line of sight — and ends up looking at the source of your comment. His hand on the table, specifically the band of gold adorning his ring finger. "Our ring."
Our wedding ring.
You and Mingyu married soon after graduating from college. It had been a blissful marriage, one that filled a home with nothing but love and support.
Your divorce was on the basis of irreconcilable differences. It was a mutual decision, for the interest of your career paths diverging too far. There was never a bad blood.
"Ye— yeah." Mingyu stutters involuntarily. He clears his throat before continuing, "It’s a great conversational piece."
Although the divorce has been finalized years ago, Mingyu still plays the faithful and loving husband role in front of strangers. He uses the ring on his finger to his advantage: may that be to wordlessly signal that he’s already taken or to gain the favor of a potential sponsor.
Likewise, even if he knows the ring might be a disadvantage, he refuses to take it off — nor to purposely hide it from sight. The same way he never tells a stranger that he is no longer tied to someone else.
"Does it work?" You ask in wonder.
"We are conversing now, aren’t we?"
You chuckle, "Touché."
Mingyu wants to tell you that he hasn’t taken the ring off since you slipped it on his finger during your wedding. Not even after your divorce has been finalized all those years ago.
He wants to tell you his ring finger is thinner near his palm because of his adamant refusal to take his wedding ring off once in a while. Not willing to separate from the only physical reminder of your marriage, not even for a second.
He wants to tell you the ring is more than a conversational piece. He wants to tell you it’s his lifeline, something he can’t bear to lose. But he doesn’t.
Instead, Mingyu uses all the confidence he has gathered to ask you a simple question. "Dance with me?"
He offers you the hand adorned by his wedding ring. He tries not to show the uncertainty he feels by masking it behind a smile.
He almost lets out a relieved sigh when you place your hand on top of his. But he stops breathing momentarily when he catches sight of the sole jewelry adorning your hand.
"You’re still wearing it," Mingyu echoes your comment breathlessly. "Our ring."
He snaps his eyes back to your face, just in time to witness your smile widen. "Yeah," you say. "It’s a great talisman to ward off potential suitors."
He leads you to the dance floor, silently marveling at how your hand still fits perfectly with his. "Does it work?"
"It’s very effective," you assure him. "Although I don’t think it works well against ex-husbands."
Another slow song starts playing right when you reach the dance floor. You and Mingyu unconsciously claim your respective hand placements during your first dance — and for any waltz you danced after.
Then, suddenly, it’s like you traveled back in time.
Mingyu pulls you closer, a ghost of a smirk is at the edge of his lips. "I think it works well attracting ex-husbands."
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bi-writes · 23 days
Text
you get into big trouble, and you must pay the price. but bunnies should be terrified, and you are not.
mercenary!ghost x fem!reader (part 3/?)
notes about reader: she's curvy !!!! and she knows it.
cw: this is not a healthy relationship (you're both fucking insane), mature language and content, suggestive language and content, dark!ghost, mean!ghost, toxic!ghost, possessive + protective!ghost, kissing through the mask, mentions/depictions of violence + gore, innocence kink, corruption kink, size kink (reader is described as much smaller than ghost, can be easily manhandled by him), ghost is bIG, mentions of ghost's canon trauma, mw3 spoilers, fem!receiving touching + a little oral (18+), unprotected piv
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his phone pings. he turns it over, narrowing his eyes at the text on the screen.
🐰: made some cookies. come over?
he runs his tongue over his teeth, clicking it lowly before leaning back in his chair. his ass hurts; he's been sitting here for hours, watching a dark window do nothing for hours.
💀: Working.
🐰: i have a surprise for you !!!
💀: Later.
for a moment, he thinks he should be nicer. give his puppy a bone. tell her he misses the taste of her pretty pussy, that he can still smell her on the mask he hasn't washed. and this is true, he knows it; he aches to go back to where she lives. he wants to see her again. put his dirty, gloved fingers into her mouth and watch her cry, soak her soft panties again, steal them, watch her cry harder when he finally gives her what she wants.
the most horrifying part is that he wants it. he wants to feel the warmth of her body. he wants to see her wide hips stutter, her pretty thighs open. he thinks about bending her over and kneeling down behind her, spreading the meat of her ass so he can watch her come undone against the velvet cushions of her couch.
you're so fucking pretty. and you're everywhere. when he grips the metal of his rifle, he thinks about how hard he was when he ate your cunt--fucking solid, balls so heavy and tight that he thinks he came for a full minute when he finally touched himself that night. when the sight of that rifle finds its target, he thinks about the way your pupils dilated when you came, the way your eyes rolled back into your head and the little sounds you made when he drank up the essence of you. when he swings his knife and plunges it into a soft neck, he thinks about your smile, the teeth you bared, the ones he wants to slide his tongue over when he kisses you again.
he had kissed you. kissed someone. the thought alone would normally make him vomit. to think of another person seeing his face, it bothered him, would usually make him feel sick--disgusted. his face wasn't meant for anyone to see, not even just half of it, and yet--he let you touch him.
and it didn't burn.
he remembers when he had taken a hand once for it. feeling someone's touch on his face, feeling scarred all over again by it, and taking flesh as their penance.
it was only fair.
there is something wrong with him. he should've killed you for it. your hand on his jaw, your lips on his, he should've killed you for touching him--and yet here he is, in another lonely room, staring at his target, thinking about how he can get your hands on him again. how he might coax you into kissing him just one more time.
he doesn't want to make it a habit. but he does want it to happen again. and it is enough that he knows he shouldn't see you again, but he will, because he's selfish. because he's hungry. because there is place inside of him, one that he thought was hollow and untreatable, that is just that much satiated whenever he is with you.
when he closes his eyes, he sees what haunts him. it isn't the memories of torture. he doesn't feel the wood of a coffin he once laid in. he doesn't feel the sting of pain when they carved layers into his face, he doesn't feel the holes they left along his chest when they rooted out pieces of him. he doesn't feel what he felt when they popped his fingernails off one by one.
no, he feels the ghost of someone's touch. he feels the rough callouses of skilled hands. he thinks of the bruised knuckles that used to scrape over the ridges of his uneven skin, and he thinks of the eyes that used to look at him as if he wasn't this mangled, forgotten thing.
he thinks of those eyes, and how blue they used to be. he thinks of what they looked like with that brightness in them, how they used to move, so fluid and easy. and he thinks of what they looked like with nothing in them. he thinks of them when they reflected nothing but the dull light over his head, and he thinks of the scream he let out when he was alone, when he still had his blood on his gloves.
ghost never begs. he doesn't beg, he never has, but he thinks he did that night. he thinks he begged, to who, to no one maybe, but he begged anyway, but it doesn't matter.
no one answered, and he knows there is a place inside of him so fucking hollow, that nothing will fill it again. a hole that only seems to be dug deeper and deeper with each thing he loses.
he never looked back when he left. he didn't say a word. he didn't even take his belongings, he just left. and the only thing he still carries with him from his past life is how good he is at killing and the extra dog tags that hang around his neck.
ghost isn't real. there is nothing about him that is redeemable, nothing about him that is good enough to love, and that is why he just doesn't care. and when he stopped caring, the nightmares went away. when he stopped wondering where they were, what they were seeing, if they would be disappointed in him, he no longer saw their faces in his dreams, watching them fade to black as the soft images turned into violent ones.
when he stopped being human, they left him, and he is so grateful for it. and that is why you were going to be a problem.
because he wants. he desires. he tastes, and he hungers, and you are sweet, and he wants to have you, and it isn't right. he knows this. he knows what it is he needs to do, but he won't do it--and there is a voice in his head that begs, from a far away place, for him to let you go.
but while he might not be human any longer, he is still a man, and men are weak.
as a man, he cannot close his eyes and forget your pretty face. he cannot stop thinking about your warm thighs, the softness of you, the unscarred skin that you wear. you wear your body as it is yours, and not like it holds you back, not like his does. your belly is full, and your heart is good, and you are warm. you aren't made of something else, you are real, and his blood runs so cold, he can't help but itch to feel you again.
there is something about you that makes that place inside of him feel like it isn't there, even for just a moment. and those moments remind him of someone else, of something else, something he once had that made him sick to think about having again.
the last time he had this, it killed him. the last time he found himself here, he didn't realize it had happened until it was too late--he was buried, deep, and there was no escaping a shallow grave this time because he thinks he loved the one that put him there. the last time he thought this way, he felt not himself, not enough, but it had been everything his life had been without, so he stayed, and he let it happen, and he didn't push him away, and now look at me--look at what I've done, look at what I've become--
men are weak. and men are lonely. and it was only a matter of time before ghost found himself there again, on his knees for something else. something soft and sweet and real, something that loves unconditionally and begs for attention and is never satiated until he looks at them and gives them what they need.
he doesn't know what he will become after you. he doesn't know what it will make of him. he knows you will go before him--he knows you will die before he does, because he isn't capable of dying, and even though he knows this as a fact, he wants to die again. but he won't try, because it won't work, even if he takes the blade strapped to his side and shoves it right through his heart.
he doesn't have one. he doesn't know what such a wound would even do. and he doesn't wish to see what color his blood will run if he does it, anyways.
you don't like the distance he keeps you at. it isn't fair. you do everything he asks--you go where he goes, you let him come and go whenever he wants, you spread your legs for him and let him have his fill, and you don't complain when he leaves even though your mouth waters thinking about getting your mouth on him and hearing him bask in his own pleasure for even a moment.
he gives and he takes, but he lets you do neither, and you want more. you know he isn't capable of more, you know he doesn't want more, but you want it, and he needs it. he needs you, despite what he says, despite how he acts, and you will give him what he needs.
you see it in his eyes. the things that aren't there, the things you think he once had but doesn't have anymore. sometimes he talks like you aren't there, and he mentions someone else.
another person. someone he used to know. someone he used to love, you think, but he isn't capable of love anymore, so you often wonder what they did to him to make him this way.
aloof. detached. so entirely fucked, he cannot make connections or hold the ones he has or let himself have what he needs. they have done something to him, and he wears the aftermath of it so clearly.
"he woulda liked you," he says sometimes.
"woulda loved the taste of y'r cunt," he murmurs once.
but they are gone. and you are not. and you know that there is something here. otherwise, he would never come back. he would not want to see you again. maybe he would have even killed you, but he hasn't, and he eats pussy like he loves you, so you decide you won't leave him alone. you won't let him go. this isn't fair, and you will get what it is you want--and give him what it is he needs.
you see him in the pub that you met in. he sits at the far corner of the bar, tucked in the dark against the wall, and he swirls a glass of bourbon in front of him. he wears a rain jacket over his dark hoodie, and you light up when you catch sight of him.
you wear something nice for him. a short skirt, a cotton shirt tucked into it, a cropped jacket over top, and your boots make you feel tall, but you know it won't matter--you'll never be taller or bigger than that large, hulking man you have your eyes fixated on.
but when he sees you, he doesn't react the way you expect. he doesn't sit up, doesn't get off his seat to come get you, he doesn't move at all. his eyes run over you, and then they move back down to his drink.
like he doesn't know what you taste like between your legs. like he doesn't know you at all.
your smile fades. you clutch your purse now in clammy hands, and you walk shakily to the bar and sit, swallowing hard as you try and hold in the shaky breath in your throat. your chest hurts a little; your heart has fallen into your stomach, and you shift on the bar stool, fidgety and uncertain.
you had been so happy to see him. you had been so excited to come here. you hadn't seen him in weeks--but the sparse texts he had sent you were enough to keep you hanging onto your phone whenever it made a sound, as if one of those notifications might be him, throwing you just enough attention to keep you on your toes, desperate.
your lip trembles a little as the bartender comes to take your order. you ask for a shot and a chaser, and you tell him to make it a double. you want to be drunk, and you want to be drunk quickly.
you tip the drink back, swallowing it down. it burns, holds a fire in your chest, and you chase it with a seltzer, swallowing down the contents of both until you slam the can back on the counter, hiccuping.
you wipe your mouth with the back of your hand, and when you realize ghost is still not looking at you, you're drunk enough to test his limits.
there's a group of boys down on the other side of the counter. they're playing darts, and they're drinking, and you slip off the barstool with a little step before making your way over cautiously. you pull your shirt down, show off the swell of your tits, and you ask them if they'll teach you to throw darts.
they practically cheer with delight. you hear one of them drool over your ass in that skirt, you hear another whine about looking down your shirt and at the peek of the lace bra you wear, and you shiver when you realize all you ever wanted was attention.
someone to tell you that you're pretty. that you make them hungry. but it isn't all you want, and they can't give you what you want.
they won't die for you. they won't live for you. and certainly, you know, they won't kill for you. but there's a man on the other side of the room that you want doing those things for you, that has the fucking balls to do those things for you, that possesses no good bone in his body that would do those things easily for you.
you see him in your dreams, breaking necks and popping kneecaps and slicing soft skin just to please you, and it makes you ache inside. you know what he does. he's never lied to you, but he doesn't always tell you the whole truth, but you fill in the blanks of the spaces he leaves behind, and you know what it is he does.
there's blood on his boots and money in his pocket, and you should be so afraid, but you never could be. not with the way he touches you. not with the way he talks to you. not with the way he puts his tongue inside of you and holds your thighs apart, and not with the way he grunts when he disappears into your bathroom to fuck himself to the image of you on your couch, half-naked as you wait for a fucking that never comes.
why won't he touch me? why won't he fuck me? why doesn't he rip the rest of my clothes off and have his way with me? he doesn't seem like the kind of man to ask for permission, but he eats me, and then he leaves me, and i can't take it anymore, please, please, please--
you're dizzy. the room spins, and the boys laugh, and your darts are hitting the wall now, clattering to the floor as they all boo and snicker at the way you're stumbling in your heels.
they're too close. you can smell the vodka and beer too much, and it's too warm because they're too close to you. someone's hand is on your thigh, another holds you upright with a grabby grip on your back, and there's someone else playing with your hair. they hum and they talk, and when they say they want to take you home, all you can do is hiccup and smile.
but as soon as you turn and leave, there's a large shadow waiting outside the door, leaning against the wall. you giggle knowingly, because you knew he would be here, and when the boys notice him, they try to take you in the other direction.
"if y'blokes knew wot was good for ya, y'd let 'er go and be on y'r way." he isn't in a good mood. he clicks his teeth as he comes off the wall, stepping under the streetlight. it makes the shadows of his hoodie darker, but his eyes are clearer now, bright under the mask as he breathes hard. he's angry, and he doesn't seem like his patience will linger tonight.
"oi, mate, relax," one of them laughs, and you giggle again when you see ghost tilt his head to the side. fuck, he's deadly, and you're wet. you squeeze your legs together looking at him, and you want him to put one big hand on your waist and tilt your head back--you want him to push his mask up and kiss you, all sloppy and soft like he did all those weeks ago. you want him to put his hands up your skirt and fuck you with his fingers right in the street, the same hands he squeezed the life out of someone with, the same hands he was going to kill these boys with.
ghost steps closer, and he goes for the nearest. brings a hand up, smacking one big hand against their cheek until their head hit the side of the building, and he crumpled to the floor in a pool of his own blood.
they scatter like bugs. stumbling drunk over their feet, tripping, and they disappear into the dark as ghost tilts his head to the other side now, looking at you.
you smile. giddy, hitting your toes together, and when you step to the side, you don't notice you've stepped in that man's blood.
"y'think this is fuckin' funny, eh? hangin' about with lot like that, y'think it's fuckin' funny?" he spits, and you put your hands behind your back, biting your lip.
"you...you ignored me," you hiccup. "why did you ignore me?"
"that wot this is about?" ghost snarls. "me not givin' you a proper look?"
you bite your lip harder, nearly drawing blood.
"i missed you," you whisper, your lip trembling slightly. "m-missed you so much..."
"fuck off with that," he mutters, but you step closer anyways. when he doesn't step back, you step forward again, until you're flush against his chest, tilting your head back to look up at him. you go languid when his arm falls, slipping up the back of your skirt just like you imagined. he squeezes the flesh of your ass before he leans down, and you whine when he presses the front of his mask against your lips. you kiss, your soft mouth kissing him through the fabric.
"is he dead?" you ask when he pulls away. ghost says nothing at first, just smooths his hand over the lace of your panties. he grunts when he slides his fingers between the seam, satisfied when he hears the squelch of your wet pussy as he pets you there. you squirm a little.
"dunno," ghost murmurs, and you get wetter you think, at how nonchalant he behaves as he touches you shamelessly where anyone might see. "fuck, bunny, y'r soakin' my fuckin' gloves."
"why don't you like me?" you whimper. you reach up and put both hands on his chest, and you dig your nails there, but you meet resistance. the muscle and fat there barely give way, and he hums when you drag your nails down, anchoring yourself to him. when you meet his eyes, they are dull, and you know he doesn't care. "i-i like you...i-i like you so much..." he huffs in annoyance, but you keep going, "you like someone else," you whisper. "there's someone else..."
someone else. as if there is some kind of competition, and maybe there is, but it isn't what you think. there is someone in his head, someone that screams for him to leave, someone that begs him--simon, please, yer goin' to hurt 'er, please, she's so pretty, please--but it isn't because he loves someone else, it's because he did love someone else, and he doesn't think there's room for more.
but he also cannot explain what swelled in his chest when he watched you with those boys. the searing heat of emotion that bubbled in his throat, and how the only relief he feels is the satisfaction that the boy at your feet bleeds because he put his hands on you, that is good, make them suffer, touching what fuckin' belongs to me.
there's a breaking point. it's the law of physics. something as rigid as ghost could only bend so far back before it reaches the elastic limit, and then it is deformed, and then it snaps, and then it is two pieces instead of one that cannot be put back together--and he feels it. he knows this is it. the fine line between what was and what is, this is it, it's too late--shut the fuck up, johnny, it's too late, i have her, she's mine, get out of my head, get out of my fucking head, i'm going to have her, have her, have her sweet fucking cunt--
you are bliss. you are the air that allows him to breathe. you are the threads in the fabric, the water in the soil, the heat that warms the house and breaks the soul and drives the machine.
you are in his bed, on your back, and when he slides your skirt off, there it is. the soft place between your pretty thighs, glistening and so wet, puckering and pulsing as you spread your knees for him and slip your shirt off.
he doesn't remember taking his mask off. he doesn't know where it went, but it is gone, and your lips are on his, and your tits are bouncing as he grinds his cock into your soft, squishy folds. the tip catches sometimes, and it makes you cry, and you whine when he breaks the kiss to lick your tears and taste the salt of your pleasure. the tears are heady and desperate, and he knows this flavor, and he wants more of it.
he commits this to memory. when he sits up and feeds you his cock, he memorizes the way you moan. the twitch of your pussy, the leaking of your wetness, the way you clench and tighten and grip so he cannot do anything but force himself deeper inside of you.
what is it that he loves? what is it that he loves so much that he cannot look you right in the eyes? whose body did he have underneath him all that time ago that steals him away so much he cannot fuck you the way you deserve? the way you need, the way he wants?
you reach up and grip his dog tags. they jangle against his chest as he grips your hips and fucks you, and you use them to anchor yourself, tugging on the metal necklace as you focus on the way he thrusts. powerful, smooth, with ease--he's so big, but he fills you so well, and you can't help but wonder if he's losing himself because it's so familiar. to be inside. to be gripped and squeezed and milked for all that you are, the brute of a man so misunderstood that fucks like a goddamn pornstar.
he's so good at this. when he finds the gooey spot in your cunt, he knows how to get you there. hitting it just enough to bring you to the edge, and then slowing down to savor the wet mess your cunt has become, and then doing it again. he listens to the cries you make, the crescendo of moans that you sob out that come back down when he goes softer. he thinks about this, and he makes music out of you. the pretty bunny, so fucking dumb inside, but the thing he cannot be without.
when he fucks you, he sees in blue, and he knows this isn't a coincidence. the blue in your eyes, it doens't lie--he knows what this feeling is, and he prays to no one that he can fuck this feeling right out of himself.
you come so messy. you soak his thighs, creaming on his cock as you beg him to fill you, and he cages you between his arms as he fucks harder, faster, losing momentum as he nears the same glorious high. he's been so good, but this he cannot help--not the way this feels, so familiar, so easy, so freeing.
there are no thoughts when he is inside of you, and this is bliss.
he kisses you when he comes. cups both puffy cheeks of yours as he spurts hot cum inside of you, sliding his big hands down to grip your thighs as he nestles his hips against yours. you reach down with two hands and squeeze his lower back, keeping him inside. this feeling, the feeling of being so full and warm and enjoyed, it isn't natural to you, and it isn't one you feel often, and you chase after it. you lick into his mouth and whine, and he hushes you.
"easy, rabbit," he pants, licking over your jaw, and you close your eyes. if he is predator and you are prey, then so be it. you want him to have his fill--you want him to trap you, steal you away, tuck you into this den he keeps and never let you leave.
you don't mind the blood on his boots, stained on his clothes, under his fingernails. in fact, you think about it often. you think about taking a rag and cleaning the leather of his shoes. you think about teaching him the cold water and peroxide trick to getting the blood out of fabric. you think about taking the gloves off, letting his fingers wander into the warmth of your mouth so you can suck his skin clean, all while your eyes never left his.
you think about the thing that you are. the bunny you are, the prey you've manifested yourself into, and you think about the thing that he is. you think about the dark, dense places that must exist inside of his head, and you think about how you can't see them in his eyes.
you think about being the bunny in a cage and how he holds the key. and you wonder if you would even leave if he ever let you go.
ghost loves someone else. you don't know who they are or where they've gone, but he loves someone else. but that's okay. that's temporary. that's just for now. they didn't love him enough to stay.
they didn't love him enough not to die. you don't intend to die. you're going to carve him up, right along the scars that he wears, and you're going to slip inside of him and live there forever, nestled between the organs and the black of his blood and the heart you know he doesn't have.
ghost is a thing. but he's still a man.
and men are fucking weak.
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lawchwan · 21 days
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Read To Me While I Eat You Out (law)
Summary: You pissed off Law and now he makes you read a book...
Reader: AFAB Genre: Smut Disclaimer: Dom!Law, cunnilingus, mentions of jealousy, fingering, slight degradation, mention of choking, edge play, squirting, badly written ending, mention of Kid (yes, its a warning).
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crossposted on ao3
You were nothing but a tease to Law. He didn’t—or so he says—appreciate how you’ve been teasing him the entire day. For you to waltz around and cause chaos within his inner thoughts, you were truly a risk-taker. It was the touching, the eye contact, your body language—which spoke louder than anything you’ve ever uttered—even down to your tone of voice, you were driving that man insane.
And there you were, as he walked into your shared room, he saw you lying on your stomach, chin on your clasped hands, almost as if you were waiting for him in your shared bed. You looked up to him, your fake innocence contrasted with the menacing smile you plastered into your face.  
“Oh, hey, Law,” you spoke, enthusiastically. He simply stood there with his arms crossed as you adjusted your position while he leaned against the wall.
“You’re a bold one, you know that?”
You just widened your eyes, shock plastered on your face—this is exactly what you wanted to hear from him. “What?! What the hell did I do?” You sat up as you feigned your confusion as Law began walking up to you and the scowl on his face was still drawn onto him the entire time, from the moment he walked into the room. God, did he look so hot when pissed off, no other thing could compare to the view you’re having.
“Quit pretendin’ being innocent, (y/n)-ya… you know what you did…”
His tone was hushed but it was still firm and intimidating. Even though that was your goal, you couldn’t help but feel small and slightly being preyed upon. You can’t back down just yet though, you have a mission you need to fulfill; you need to see what he can do to you after all this, after teasing him and edging his needs. “I have no idea what you were talking about,” You say as you backed yourself back into the headboard of the bed as Law got closer to the foot of the bed.
“You have no idea…” He scoffed with a snicker as he rolled his eyes at you, “What was that stunt you did earlier that you did in front of Kid, huh?”
He was talking about how you bent down to “grab the pen” that you “dropped” that just so happened to occur in front of him and Kid, an ally of his. Kid grabbed an eyeful at the sight of your ass in the tight pants you were wearing, even commenting about how lucky Law is and questioning how he can handle all of that, which made Law glare at him with scorn drawn on his face. Kid may have just laughed, but Law was not having it, as that was not the only thing you did to him, as you did continue to compliment him, touch him, or even question his strength and ask him if he could carry you while at it. You truly knew how to set him off.
“Oh, please I was not doing anything…” You tried to speak in a clueless tone, but you almost dropped the act as Law began crawling over to you, his eyes boring at you. You almost gulped at the sight of him getting closer but you still maintained your innocent façade that was about is break sometime soon. Law once again snickered as he knew he knew you too well, you knew you were trying to piss him off, but he was not about to give you your satisfaction.
Before staring into your smirking face, his eyes roaming from your sultry eyes to your half-quirked-up lips and down to your neck, he got up from his place, now making you genuinely confused. You knitted your brow as you looked at him approaching his shelf, “What are you doing?” You questioned, but you got no answer from your intimidating boyfriend, just humming to himself as he was rummaging through his shelf, almost as if he was looking for a specific book. His humming stopped as he let out an ‘aha!’ and got a small yet slightly thick book, and then walked back to you, back to his crawled-up position before sitting in front of you. Your eyes went from bewilderment to realization, as you felt like you knew what was coming, and you weren’t sure if you were ecstatic or nervous.
“Since you’re so smart at teasing me,” Law brings out the book and opens a chapter. After he hands you the book, you look at the page he opened, it was filled with text that was filled with medical texts that are heavy with information. Before you could say anything and without warning, he strips off your shorts and panties, making you gasp at the shocking action as you feel the cool breeze coursing in your sex. he then spreads your legs as he gets in between with his knees on the ground while your legs were dangling off his shoulders.
“Law, wh—"
“Read me the whole chapter. Pause or mess up and you can forget about coming. If you get any close before finishing a chapter, I’ll also stop. Finish the whole chapter and you can feel as good as you want… Think you can handle it?” Although the last statement was a question, Law said it in a ‘matter of fact’ manner, almost like there is no room for you to say no because he knew you’d agree, but he wants to hear it from you regardless.
You gulped as you looked up at him, suddenly those teasing eyes switched to obedience, as you simply nodded at him, and he shook his head, “No, speak up, loud and clear.”
“Y-yes, Law…”
———————
“Law! I c-can’—AH!” 
You screamed as you arched your back and you felt yourself getting closer with Law’s dangerous tongue circling your clit while his tattooed fingers would insert themselves into your sopping hole. When you first started reading, you felt yourself getting heated as Law began with a teasing tiny lick around your labia. You would moan now and then but you were merely doing fine, or so you thought.
When you murmured at the words as you started getting close and closed the book, Law immediately pulled himself off, which made you exasperated by his lips not being around your bundle of nerve and him opening the page from the beginning.
“W-why did you—” Your words were cut short as Law held your face, squishing it and making your eyes wide, “You thought I was fucking around? What did I tell you, huh?” His words were venomous, and you were whimpering at him, silently telling him that he couldn’t be serious, only for him to slightly shake your head before placing his hand under your jaw for you to speak.
“Answer me…”
“If I stopped reading then I’ll not get to come.”
Law smirked menacingly at you as you lost at your own game, or maybe won depending on what context you were trying to get, he patted your cheek as he handed you back the book, and went back to his position, before gruffly telling you,
“Keep reading…”
And he just had to pick the longest chapter of a boring medical book, and he would look up at you while his tongue would abuse your clit while you “read” out his book. You tried, and Law could see that, but he truly gets off to you suffering in this way; being broken all thanks to him, whether it’d be his tongue, fingers, cock, or all. He would even shake his head in fake curiosity just to tease you, even letting out an “aha?…” while his tongue was going in and out of your dripping hole.
He would teasingly let go of his tongue while thrusting his middle and ring finger in and out, letting out a teasing coo, “oh, yeah? Tell me more, baby…” through your fucked out reading.
You were a mess all thanks to his edging, when you stumble on your words, he would tell you to repeat. If you pause, he will first start slapping your thigh and/or your clit to get you to keep going but if you paused for too long, then you’ll have to repeat. you were truly losing yourself, and you were loving it, and Law could sense that with the way you kept messing up.
And here you are now, twenty or more—you and Law have lost track of time— minutes later, down to the last page, and conveniently, you were getting close. As you begged out, Law could see you were having enough, and you did mess up by saying something that was not in the book, but instead of telling you to repeat, he decided to hand you mercy but not too much.
“C’mon, baby, you’re on your last page, you’re almost there,” He said encouragingly, meanwhile you shook your head telling him no while panting. He slowed down again, making you whine, “C’mon, finish up that last page, and you’ll get to come… unless you want me to tell you to rep—”
“Common diseases are known to be complex…”
Law smirked and chuckled as you began to frantically read the last few paragraphs while he proceeded to eat you out like it was his last meal. Once you finish the chapter, you throw away that book, and your hand card itself onto Law’s raven locks almost like its muscle memory while he essentially makes out with your clit while your hole is being penetrated by his skilled fingers.
“Oh, fuck, Law, I’m so close” You panted out your words as Law just hummed and continued his tongue and finger work. Your breathing began to be frantic as you screwed your eyes as shut as you felt like lava explosion out of a volcano. Your essence began to squirt out of your hole and covered Law’s lower half of his face. He removed his fingers as he began slurping onto the remaining juices you’d let out while you looked down astonished before throwing your head back to the mattress behind you.
Your eyes were closed until you felt a weight between you, your eyes slowly opened, blurry before your vision readjusted as you saw your smiling boyfriend looking down at you,
“You good?”
You just smiled back as you nodded, “Never been better…”
“Good… I hope I didn’t break you too much.”
You just chuckled and you shook your head, “No, you didn’t.” You responded, before getting up to crawl over to the other side of the bed, which made Law’s smile drop as he saw what you were getting. It was the same book you read to him through this.
His action mirrored how you acted when he handed you the book, but this time you pushed him onto the bed and you gave him the book of the same chapter. Now you straddled his hips as you began playing with the belt that wrapped around his pants and began unbuckling.
“Since you’re the medic here, I want you to read what I read and perhaps explain what it means…” You say with a smirk as Law’s eyes begin to bulge while the lower half of his face is covered in the book, you lean forward to whisper, “If you mess up, you can forget about coming. If you finish up, I’ll let you come in me without a drip out of me… sounds good?”
I guess you never lost your game after all.
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characters are owned by oda. i will not tolerate nor accept translation, reposts on other websites, or plagiarism. divider made by mmadeinheavenn.
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hyomaslut · 9 months
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──★ ˙🍆 ̟ !! casual conversation between friends. 18+!
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☆⌒(ゝ。∂).ᐟ ᴀsᴋɪɴɢ ʙʟʟᴋ ʙᴏʏs ғᴏʀ ɴᴜᴅᴇs ᴘᴛ. 𝟷
✿ ─ characters: isagi yoichi, itoshi rin, chigiri hyoma, reo mikage ✿ ─ cw: smau!, extremely suggestive/borderline smut, aged-up!characters, college!AU, gn!reader, no pronouns, unestablished relationships/mutual pining, use of foul language, descriptions of genitalia, suggestive themes, you and chigiri are talking about npc college drama, proofread??? ✿ ─ notes: honestly the smau aspect was so hard cuz im a perfectionist and wanted read reciets and everything. all the apps for them suck. i managed :))) and i rlly hope you guys like it :)) feedback appreciated. i put chigiri's at the end cuz its so long. part 2 is here!!!!
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ISAGI YOICHI...
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your fingers fly across the keyboard to tell him that yes, you were very serious. isagi literally jumps out of bed to go shower and everything. he has been crushing on you since forever and god knows he’s not blowing this chance you’ve given him by sending a shitty picture. you get an image attachment 20 minutes later, yoichi standing in front of his foggy bathroom mirror, the phone in his hand covering half of his face. he’s barely out of the shower, hair dripping wet and towel hanging extremely loose around his hips. his other hand sits at the base of his dick, acting as both a size comparison and a way to draw your attention to it. it’s obviously of decent length as far as you could tell, but the girth. you cant even pretend your mouth doesn’t start watering at the sight.
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ITOSHI RIN...
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you don’t have time to feel all that bummed about it though, because within a few minutes you’re shocked to get a picture from rin, the camera facing downwards towards his legs. nothing would be all that out of the ordinary if it weren’t the obvious tent in his shorts. the fabric around his crotch looks stretched by his hard dick fighting against the confines of his soccer uniform. it’s not exactly what you asked for, but you can’t find it in you to complain, because it’s way more than you actually expected to get. your mind starts racing. he’s hard from just a few suggestive texts? that means one of two things. either he really is a virgin like you thought he’d be, and the littlest of acts gets him riled up. or he’s just that into you. both of those possibilities sounded like fun. and the idea of those possibilities made you greedy. enough to push your luck.
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MIKAGE REO...
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two pictures come in quickly and you laugh at the idea of him rushing to take these for you. he sends the first one, taken standing in front of the full length mirror in his boxers, dragging down the waist band of them so you can see the first few inches of his shaft, phone in front of his face. he’s perfectly clean shaven, zooming in closer, maybe he waxes it? you can’t help but be impressed by his attention to detail. it’s so reo that it makes you smile. second one is sitting down in some fancy looking suede armchair, underwear gone, cock in one hand while the other splays over the bottom half of his face, poorly covering the wide self-satisfied smirk. you assumed he set up his phone with a timer considering he wasn’t holding it. as you stare at it, the initial evaluating that everyone does when they receive a dick pic fades away, and you feel heat creep up your face. reo was really hot, and just this once you figured it wouldn’t hurt to tell him you thought so.
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CHIGIRI HYOMA...
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you get through the stressful minutes waiting for his response by chewing on your nails. maybe you really just fucked it all up. but then, to your surprise, a photo loads in. its hyoma sitting on his bed in front of his mirror, his fingers buried in his hair to push it out of his face in possibly the sexiest way you’ve ever seen. his other hand holds his phone, his pretty face in full view with his gaze locked on the screen. your eyes can’t help but travel down to the only part of your crush you haven’t seen. and boy was it worth the wait. his dick curves up towards his abs and its a lot bigger than you expected. long and a perfectly pink tip. you bite your lip at the thought of it stretching you out, and then feel slightly guilty for thinking of him that way, as if you haven’t done it plenty of times during your so-called dry spell. if the whole soccer thing doesn’t work out, you’re sure he could be a pin up model. or maybe a greek god.
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hyoma's got long again ;-; mb,,, but can you blame me??? i want to do a part two with at least nagi and bachira, but idk who else i want to include. open to suggestions ♡
© 2023 hyomaslut. please do not copy, translate, or repost any of my content onto any other sites.
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scaredpigeons · 3 months
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Aqua Regia VII: Saturate me, I can’t get enough.
Previous chapter // First Chapter
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Neuvillette x Fem!reader
Warning: SMUT NSFW 18+ MDNI
Word count: 5.7k
Conifer forests quake in fear at the way you two pine. What do you get when you cross a very pent up dragon and the object of his affections? So much fucking love it will rot your teeth.
CW: sex, penetrative sex, oral sex (fem rec) neuvillette has a dragon tongue, claws appear but no wounds are made, Neuvillettes nest™️ nicknames: my dearest, my darling, love, pretty girl, perfect girl, very gendered language, im sorry :( unrealistic first time sex, multiple orgasms, implied multiple rounds.
Authors note: this is so fucking mushy gushy heavy fluff heavy romance. I literally couldn’t write his first time being any other way. He’s obsessed, okay? There is a lot of declarations of love, devotion, very flowery and flattering language. There are not many things hotter than an all powerful being declaring their utter devotion to you and then fucking you until the sun rises. I left it a little open ended, so maybe an epilogue chapter, if y’all are interested? Anyways, remember to reblog and comment your thoughts! It’s my literal favourite thing to read your opinions and compliments, even if you’re shy, just send an anon ask! I love you all, thank you so much for your support on this piece.
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The sound of little pearls scattering onto the floor accompanied the press of your spine against the inside of Neuvillette’s front door as his mouth consumed yours. 
You were panting, hands roaming over each other as your tongues danced. You’d never kissed like this before. The polite pecks you’ve given men after failed dates were nothing compared to the way Neuvillette drank in your lips like they were the finest water in the world. 
His large, lean body pushed you against the fine wood of his door, hands pressing up into your hair as he pulled your face ever closer, scattering more little pearls along his entryway. 
“Do you…” he panted, lips never leaving yours for more than necessary. “Truly want tea?” He asked.
You smiled as he continued to kiss you breathless. “Tea can wait.” 
He picked you up and hoisted you against him once more, your bottom resting on his forearms as he twirled you around, making you giggle and squeal. 
“Your perfection knows no bounds.” He murmured against your lips as he began to move towards the stairs. 
You wrapped your arms around his neck as he carried you up the stairs and down the hall, but he hesitated before bringing you into what you guessed was his room. 
“Ah…” he said, a deeper blush working its way into his pale skin. “I forgot about my… well you see…” 
You smiled, pulling him closer to press a peck to his lips. ”What? I can hardly imagine your room is messy, Neuvillette.”
He closed his eyes tight, opening the door to set you down inside. You turned, looking around the room. 
A very large four poster bed was the main focal point of the room, lush sheer curtains hanging from the tall frame, making it seem luxurious and inviting. But the piles of silks, pillows and blankets surrounding the mattress making a large circle in the center was what stood out the most to you. Taking a step closer, you could see there were little things scattered throughout the barrier, the gloves you’d gifted him last month, a few shirts and coats, little trinkets and things here and there. 
Your brow furrowed before you turned to look up at him, finding him looking between you and the bed with a hand covering the lower half of his face. 
“It looks like…” you glanced back at the bed. “It looks like a nest?” 
He breathed, nodding, pinching his temples in embarrassment. “When you were last here, we spoke of some subtle changes I’d been experiencing since gaining my full dragonhood, yes?” 
You nodded, walking towards the bed to run your hands along the fabrics making up the walls of the nest. 
“I’ve been experiencing strange urges, instincts I cannot seem to control no matter how hard I try.” He said lowly, somewhere behind you.
The blanket you ran your hands across was soft, fur of some sort, and it felt so luxurious you wanted to bury your face in it and never leave its soothing embrace. 
“Urges?” You said, feeling a heat pool between your thighs at the thought. 
“Yes.” His voice was suddenly right by your ear, his heat pressing up against your spine. “For example, right now, seeing you next to my bed, admiring my nest— it makes me want to pick you up and place you within it so that I may crawl over top of you to do deplorable, feral and unspeakable things to you.” 
A deep, spine tingling shiver raced through you. You knew the general direction of where this was headed when you begged him to take you to his house, but never in your wildest dreams did you expect Neuvillette to admit something so… dirty… so openly. 
You turned, meeting his eyes with a gasp as you came face to face with a version of your leader you’d never seen. 
He was flushed, panting, his eyes glowing in the moonlight streaming into his dark room. His horns were glowing too, their blue hue radiating behind him as he loomed over you. To anyone else it might’ve been intimidating, but you felt so safe in this moment, so satisfied to know that he wanted you. 
“I…” you wondered how you should phrase this, how to make him understand that you were not put off in the slightest by any of these changes in him. To you, he was still Neuvillette. His draconian quirks made him all the more desirable because it was just another part of him. 
“I’d like to help you satisfy those urges, if you’ll let me.” You said, looking up at him through your lashes. 
Very suddenly, he dropped to his knees, his hands clutching at your dress. The act startled you, and you stumbled back, bumping into the walls of fabrics lining his nest.
”I am undeserving,” he whimpers, and your legs nearly give out at how broken he sounds in this moment, looking up at you. “I know not how to pleasure you in the way you are so deserving, I only have these instincts, these feelings pushing me to take.” 
He stumbled forward, almost blindly on his knees as his eyes kept yours locked to him. He pushes his face closer to your core, inhaling deeply against the fabric of your dress, his eyes fluttering back. 
“And you always smell so sweet, it eats at my very soul to not taste you at every moment of every day.” His eyes look like they’re watering, begging and pleading as he keeps talking, keeps sending waves of pleasure to your core with every word spoken. 
“You deserve more than this animal I’ve become, but I cannot help that you undo me. You unravel the very stitching that I have woven over these past five hundred years and the thought terrifies me because—“ he’s panting, chest heaving, hands gripping the crushed velvet of your gown. “Because I want you so completely, so entirely. My want for you consumes my very being.” 
Your heart sings, because how could it not? You didn’t have very much experience with anything like this either— really none at all. And he was worried? He was worried he was too much? Not enough? This man was the sovereign ruler of a nation. The elemental dragon of your land, a primordial being with more power than you could even begin to fathom. 
“Oh, Neuvillette,” you brought a hand to cup his cheek, the very same action you made the last time you were in his home, comforting him. “Will you do something for me?” 
He clutched you closer, pupils nearly consuming his irises. “I would drain the seas if you told me you did not favor the way they glimmer in the sunshine. I would blot out the sun if you told me you did not enjoy the heat on your skin. Anything, my dearest. Anything for you.” 
“Give in to it.” And you swore you could feel the breath catching in his chest. “Take me and give me everything your heart desires, because I am already yours.”
”Truly?” He pleaded, seeming so small below you.
You nodded, speaking softly to him as you ran your fingertips across his cheekbone. “From the moment I entered your office Neuvillette, I’ve been yours.”  
Your world flipped upside down as Neuvillette lunged, tackling you over the wall of his nest and into the bed. 
He kissed you so deeply it stole your breath away, you gasped as he pulled back to mouth across your jaw, nipping at your throat. 
You noticed his teeth had grown sharper during your fervent kissing, but feeling those teeth drag like little daggers against the delicate skin of your throat made you shiver with something like fear— but it was laced with arousal, with anticipation. 
You moaned as he licked and sucked on your neck, and he whimpered above you, clutching your waist as he went. 
“I'm sorry, I’m sorry—“ he said between kisses along your skin. “I can’t control myself, I can't—“ 
You reached up, grabbing his face in your hands, making him look at you. 
“Neuvillette, listen to me.” His eyes fluttered between yours, searching. 
“When I told you I love you, that means I love you without conditions.” You said, leaning up to kiss his lips gently. “Which means I will love you when you are poise and regal, when you are the perfect gentleman, but I will also love you when you are not.”
You could see iridescent blue scales rising into his skin, framing his eyes so beautifully. You could see them form around his throat, and his horns continued to glow. When he told you he was becoming undone, you knew he was serious, but you didn't realize what exactly that would entail. 
He was beautiful. Raw and open and completely yours. 
“I will love you even if you are rough, or crude, or selfish. I will not watch you suffer against your instincts when I so desperately wish to see you dive headfirst into them.” 
The subtlest of tears formed in his eyes, and the rain continued to batter the windows outside, pouring down around you— the perfect symphony to accompany this moment. 
“I love every aspect of you, Neuvillette. Even this. Please,” you whispered, pulling him ever closer to your lips. “Please, just take what you need. Take me.” 
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He does not remember how your dress and petticoat managed to find themselves sprawled across his bedroom floor, or when his gloves and shirt followed, but he does remember the delightful squeak you gave when he tore them from your body. 
You were shy, of course you were— but he was having none of that, gently and selfishly pinning your arms against the bed as his eyes consumed your body, your naked skin. 
You squirmed and whimpered underneath him, and part of Neuvillette worried that you weren’t enjoying yourself— but the closer he came to your lower half the more he realized that the source of that mouthwatering smell was coming from between your legs, and his mouth did indeed water. 
You had told him to let go of his restraint, to give in, but he had the sense to keep part of himself in check, knowing he needed to be somewhat gentle, attentive to your needs. 
What knowledge he did have of this process was from books, and even then, he thinks the last time he read a romance novel was likely over a century ago. 
He knew basic anatomical structures, their functions, but putting it all into practice was another thought entirely. 
Through his lust filled haze of admiring your naked body, he swallowed the drool pooling in his mouth— so barbaric. 
“Tell me,” he panted. “Tell me how to make this pleasurable for you.” 
You were so red, it fluttered down to your chest, and he watched as your breasts heaved with each breath. He wanted to wrap his lips around them, suck on the delicate skin, so he did. 
You whined as he leaned down, and he loved the feeling of your hands mussing up his hair, pulling his golden circlet away and tossing it into the void that had captured the rest of your clothes with a clattering sound. 
“You, ah—” your breaths were heavy. “You have to work me open. So you don’t tear me.” 
He gripped your waist again, licking and sucking gracelessly across your chest, just enjoying the taste of your skin. 
“How?” He asked, tonguing his way down to your navel, slipping his tongue around the skin of your adorable stomach. Your skin tasted like pure relief, calming the aching fever inside of him one motion of his tongue at a time. 
“F-fingers?” You said, looking down at his hands. He looked too, and you both seemed to notice at the same time that his hands weren’t exactly… normal anymore. 
Those pesky scales had wound up coating his hands too, he could feel them aching around his eyes and throat, his nails forming long black claws that dragged the faintest red lines along your perfect skin. 
“Hah— yeah,” you breathed a panicked laugh, making his chest flutter with anxiety. “Maybe no fingers this time.” 
“What about my tongue?” He said, looking between your eyes and the apex of your thighs.  He wanted so desperately to make this good for you, but he couldn't deny that the thought of tasting that delicious smell directly from the source was a more than appetizing idea. 
You groaned, throwing your hands up to cover your flushed face. “You say it so casually, too—“ 
“Would you enjoy it if I used my tongue, darling?” 
He watched your thighs clench the best they could with him between your legs, and your hands started shaking.  
“Yes,” you whimpered, hands still covering your heated face. “Yes please.” 
Your thighs quivered as he shifted down, his nostrils flaring as he came face to face with your covered core. 
There was a small damp spot on the soft cotton covering you, and he brought his nose directly to it, inhaling deep and groaning as you whined. 
He was truly drooling now, and the desire to taste you became too overwhelming for him to wait any longer. 
The cotton was shredded off your body in delicate ribbons in the wake of his claws, but before you could react, his tongue was already swiping over the entire length of you. 
“Oh!” Your back arched sinfully off the bed, your hands gripping into his hair as he swallowed and sucked and licked over you. You tasted like perfection. No water in the world could taste as crisp and pure as you did— like sweet ambrosia, like everything he never knew he needed until now. 
He tongued over your clitoris, and you seemed to like that the most, keening out as he increased the pressure. But you said you needed to be worked open, which meant…
He pressed his tongue lower, circling it around your twitching hole. You jumped, your nails scraping his scalp— making him moan into you. Your fingers flexed around the base of his horns, and his whole body shuddered as he listened to you whine and keen. 
He pressed in then, eyes blowing wide as a warm, tight heat enveloped the tip of his tongue. His hands gripped your thighs, pushing them further, pulling himself closer to press more of himself inside you.
”Neuvillette!” You gasped out as he pushed in further. Even so, He couldn't help but feel like it wasn’t enough, like you needed more. 
Just as that thought crossed his mind, his tongue seemed to expand, thickening and rolling out into your twitching walls even further. He’d never felt a change like that before, but he kept going, moving and undulating it within your tight heat and savoring the taste of you so deep.
”Holy—“ you screeched, “Oh my Archons!”
A deep, chest rumbling growl reverberated from where Neuvillette was pressed into your core, and even though he knew it wasn’t truly a problem, something inside him did not enjoy hearing those words slip from your precious lips.
But you told him to let go, so he truly did lean into his instincts. 
He pulled his tongue from within you, letting its new length dangle from his mouth a bit before licking up all the slick that had smeared across his face, delighted at the way your eyes popped and your mouth gaped open. 
“There are no pathetic gods here, little one.” He growled, that primal aching welling up in his chest. “Only me.” 
“N-Neuvillette,” you stuttered, hands grabbing at his hair as you tried to pull him between your legs again. “Please—“ 
“Better.” 
He dove back in, using the new length of his tongue to thrust in and out of your dripping hole. He could feel your soft walls relaxing, and a deep, rumbling purr pulled from his chest as you writhed and moaned beneath him. 
Tasting you like this, feeling you move and cry out beneath his hold… it was slowly soothing the ache inside of him that had been tormenting him for months. He could feel himself twitching in his pants, his cock pressing against the confines as it leaked all over the fine material of his pants and briefs. 
In the back of his mind, he was grateful he had enough of a grip on his form to not be sporting one of his more… alarming draconic features, surely that would frighten you far too much to continue. Well, perhaps another time. 
He continued his thrusting, working you open and relishing in the wetness coating his tongue, in the way you cried out his name, your fingertips brushing against his horns as you pulled at his hair. It only served to make him drool more, soaking you even further. 
“Neuvillette—“ you keened as he arched his tongue upwards, feeling your walls clench and quiver around him. He repeated the motion, making you slap your hands down to the bed beside you, grasping at the sheets as your eyes popped wide. 
He continued to press against the spot that seemed to make you fall deeper into your pleasure, his eyes never leaving your face as he thrust his tongue with vigor, watching as you quivered. 
Yes, something inside him purred, watching you lose yourself. Keep going, take it from her. 
He felt the moment your walls tightened so completely that he thought something might be wrong— only to watch as your face shattered into a broken sob of pure delight, your whole body twitching as you cried out. Your thighs tried to clamp around his head, but he pressed further, working you through it with his writhing tongue. 
After a few moments of him working you through the height of your pleasure, you grasped at his hair again, only now you were pushing him back, gasping as your body violently twitched. 
“Too much—“ you squeaked. “T-too much!” 
He pulled back from you, licking your remaining juices from his lips as he watched you regain your breath. 
You threw an arm over your eyes, your every breath heaving in your chest as parts of your body twitched in the aftershocks. 
He crawled over your body, nuzzling into the crook of your neck as he purred and murmured against your skin to comfort you.
”Your taste is divine,” he whispered. “Better than I ever could have dreamed, and my dreams were always drenched in your image.” 
“I—“ you sighed, finally pulling air into your chest unlabored. “I dream of you too.” 
“Oh?” He purred, smiling against your skin as he ran his hands down your arms. “And what exactly do you dream of, dearest?” 
You smiled, staring up at the ceiling and avoiding his gaze with flushed cheeks. 
“Your eyes.” You whispered, glancing down at him. “I dream of the way you look at me.” 
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You knew this was going to be a lot. 
Neuvillette is not a small man by any stretch of the imagination, but you always figured he would at least be a reasonable size — whatever that may be. 
Clearly your expectations were a little on the small side, because when he unbuttoned his trousers, pulling them down and off his body, exposing his naked skin in all its glory, your eyes ached with how wide they were staring openly at the apex of his creamy white thighs. 
Flushed a ruddy purplish red at the tip, it was literally leaking as he knelt between your spread legs. It twitched—he must’ve noticed your staring, and you chewed on your bottom lip, wondering how in all the abyss you were supposed to fit that thing inside of you. 
Neuvillette was panting. He looked irrevocably desperate, like he was ready to burst at the seams at any moment. 
“Neuvillette,” you whimpered, spreading your thighs further for him. 
He hadn’t touched you since he took his pants off, just staring down at you as you drank him in, watching your reactions. 
“Are…” he seemed strained, like the words themselves pained him. “Are you sure?” 
“Please,” you whined. “Please, inside me, I want you inside.”
He seemed to bite back a groan, eyes roaming over your soaked core, your blush traveling down your chest. He leaned forward, pressing a kiss to your lips. 
It was delicate, loving, nothing like the unrestrained devouring before, but it still seemed like he was holding himself back. A beautiful bowstring pulled taut, ready to snap. 
“Neuvillette,” you murmured against his lips. “Please, I want it. I trust you, I want you, please.” 
Your pleading seemed to stir him, and you could feel the hot press of his length against your aching hole. You didn't know what it would feel like, the anticipation making you tense up and hold your breath. 
“Breathe, my love.” Neuvillette said, though he himself was shaking as his hands held him up above you. “Relax, breathe.” 
You released a breath and the tension from your spine, melting into the pillows as he chose that moment to breach your entrance, the slick pooling out of you allowing him to slide the crown in with no resistance. 
You keened, your back arching as you felt the first push. “Ah, fuck! Fuck!”
Neuvillette was still shaking, his voice quivering and yet he still found it within himself to chuckle, low and deep as his eyes fluttered across your face, drinking in your pleasured reactions. 
“Such vulgar language,” he breathed. “Where’d my polite little assistant go?” 
You swear your eyes were about to bulge out of your skull as he pushed another inch in, slowly, his body vibrating above you in restraint. 
It wasn’t hurting, but the stretch was so intense it was turning your brain into mush. You never swear in front of Neuvillette, gods, you never curse in front of anyone but Wriothesley, but your brain seems to short circuit as Neuvillette enters your body one delicious inch at a time.
You were thankful you told him to stretch you out, thankful for that gods forsaken tongue that just came out of nowhere, long and thick and surprisingly serpentine.  
“P-politeness isn’t really…” you tossed your head back in the blankets as he sunk in further. “Isn’t really my main focus… r-right now.” 
“Ah, yes.” Neuvillettes words spoke confidence, but his voice was shaking, his arms vibrating as they held him above you. “We have more pressing things to focus on at the moment, don’t we?”
You groaned, half in embarrassment at his wordplay and half at the way he pulled out a bit just to press back in further. 
He just licked up the column of your throat, that ridiculously long tongue making your whole body shiver in delight as he pressed in further. 
“Holy f—“ you grabbed his forearms, leaning up the best you could to look down at where your bodies were connected. “How much more is there? It’s so… so…”
Your stomach flipped at how much you still had to go, how little your brain could comprehend that this weapon was supposed to fit inside you. 
“Do you need me to stop, my darling? Is it too much for you?” Neuvillette breathed against your neck. His words spoke one thing, but it was like his body was screaming for you to say anything but. 
“No!” You panicked a bit, wrapping your arms around his neck to pull him against your lips, kissing him filthy. “Please, don’t stop.” 
It took a couple more minutes of gentle thrusting, the rough texture of this thumb swirling against your throbbing clit and some very messy kisses, but when his hips finally pushed flush against yours, your eyes rolled back in your head, mind finally vacating all thought in favor focusing on how blindingly full you felt. 
“Oh,” Neuvillette breathed. “—My darling. My sweet, sweet girl.” His hips were frozen, probably taking in how you clenched around him, because you could feel it— the way your walls fluttered and squeezed around his length as he remained motionless. 
He twitched, and you keened, wrapping your arms around his neck to bring his face level with yours, panting into his mouth. “Please,” you whined. “Please move.” 
He shuddered before hesitantly bringing his hips back, watching your every breath as he pressed forward again. 
The deep, guttural moan it pulled from your chest must have flipped some kind of switch within him, because all sense of hesitancy seemed to drain from his body as his hips began a desperate rhythm, smacking against yours. 
“Ah!” Your back arched, eyes rolling into your skull as he finally, finally fucked you. “Neuvi— Neuvillette!”
His eyes seemed glazed over with emotions, looking down at you with so much wonder. His expression was strained, breaths coming short as his hands snaked down to your hips, leaning back up and away from your grip.
The change in angle, though minuscule, drastically altered the way his cock pummeled your insides. It was intense before, your mind was nearly floating in the clouds— but now his cock bullied itself along your most sensitive spot and pressed so deep within you, you were sure you could nearly taste it.
”Perfect,” he breathed. “My perfect, perfect girl. So warm and tight— it's like you were made to take me.” 
Your brain had exited the atmosphere, and was now drifting away into the deep nothingness of space. You swore you could feel your orgasm welling in the pit of your core, making your legs shake where they were perched on Neuvillettes hips. 
“It— it feels so good,” your words were starting to slur, your vision hazy with unshed tears of pure ecstasy as you blinked up at him. “I n-never— I never wanna stop. I want this forever.” 
His hips never faltered, not even once as he shuddered and groaned, the sound making you clench down around him even more. His hands gripped your waist tighter, the black claws digging into your skin, sure to leave marks. 
A possessive sort of noise rumbled from his chest, his eyes flaring with need. 
“I’ll give you all of myself until the end of time,” he murmurs, voice full of deep, rasping need. “Tell me you’re mine, I’ll give you everything.” 
Your heart welled, your eyes blinking tears as your legs shook harder. 
“I’m yours,” you cried. “I love you, Neuvillette. I’m yours.” 
He pushed at your legs, hands grabbing your thighs to press them up and forward, nearly folding you in half as you sobbed out in pleasure. Your body ached, your orgasm now on the very precipice as he managed to fuck into you even deeper than before, and you didnt know how it was possible. 
“Again.” He growled. 
“I’m yours!” You keened. 
His hands pressed harder into your thighs, his face leaning closer to yours. Through your haze, you could see how his pupils were blown wide, consuming all of his otherworldly irises. You could see how deeply he looked at you, drinking in your trembling form. 
“Mine.” He whispered. 
And that was all it took for the fraying cord inside you to snap. 
You screamed into the darkness of his room, writhing and shaking as it pulsed through you, all consuming and more intense than anything you’d ever felt in your life. He gasped, muttering something in a language you didn't recognize as his hips stuttered. He pushed you through it, the mind melting pleasure pulsing out into your limbs, making you go limp into the bed. 
His eyes were wild, and his pace slowed, hands holding onto you like you would slip away if he didn’t. 
“My love,” he moaned, desperate as the fluttering aftershocks worked through you, your body twitching in the sensitive overstimulation. “My love, I want to— I need—“
“Inside me,” your voice cracked, hoarse from how loud you’d been in your revelry, but it only seemed to spur him on. “Please, inside me.” 
And within the last three stuttering strokes, he was gone, his forehead pressing into yours as he leaned forward and moaned, long and wrecked and obscene. It made you flutter around him, milking him absolutely dry as he filled and filled and filled you. 
You could feel it, hot and heavy— each jerk of him inside you coating you further, marking you in white, in the deepest places as his. 
He was mumbling, his face moving to press into the curve of your neck and shoulder. Dazed, you couldn’t tell what he was saying— whether he was speaking in another language or if you were just too out of it to register his words. 
You lifted an arm to rest on his back, feeling the heat and the sweat of him. Unfazed, you drag your hand up and down his shoulder blades, relishing in the feeling of his skin, his breath as he murmurs against your neck. 
As your breath finally steadied in your lungs, no longer struggling, you ran your hands through his long, luscious hair, fingertips ghosting his horns. 
“I’m sorry,” he finally said aloud, clear and in a language you understood. “I’m sorry.”
”What for?” You smiled, trying to get him to look at you. When you finally pried him from the crook of your shoulder, your heart skipped a beat at how flushed he still was, how guilty he looked. 
It was then that you realized he was still inside you, still hard as before, twitching and throbbing as he held himself above you. 
“You begged me to take you,” he breathed, clawed hands pulling at the sheets. “And I can’t help but crave more.”
————————————
The sun had just begun rising over the dewy cypress trees by the time Neuvillette sat in the warm bath, cradling you in his arms. 
You twitched and groaned in displeasure as he ran the washcloth along your heated skin, but he couldn’t help but feel a strange sense of pride at the marks scattered along your body. 
He’d been too afraid to hurt you, but after the moan you let out when his teeth accidentally scraped across your collarbone during the second round, (or was it the third?) he’d lost all sense of decency. You seemed to like them as well, and you certainly liked when he ran his tongue across the red and purple splotches to soothe them. So, c’est la vie. 
Your head lolled against his shoulder, you were barely conscious at this point, and he wanted to feel guilty, he really did. But you’d begged and begged and begged for him to take what he needed, how could he refuse? 
He pulled the glass bottle he’d brought from the cooler to your lips, stirring you a bit to prompt you to drink. 
“Please, my love. You need to rehydrate.” He smiled at the way you pouted, But opened your lips to take tentative sips anyways, your eyes still closed. 
He watched a trail of water slip past your lax lips and run down your chin and throat, his eyes carefully following the movement. He swallowed deeply, willing away the erection that was still threatening the dark corners of his willpower. 
He could honestly keep going, he couldn't get enough of you, but you were still so fragile, so incredibly mortal. He knew that he had to stop, give you a moment of reprieve. Force himself to behave until your sweet voice would sing to him again, begging him for more. He licked his lips at the thought. 
“Are… are your urges… satisfied?” You mumbled as he pulled the bottle away. You cuddled up to him, so sleepy. 
He thought very carefully on how to reply to you. 
“For now, yes. They are, darling.” He finally said. “But I believe I will always desire you as strongly as I did then— as I do now, still.”
You gave a sleepy smirk, your eyes still closed as you snuggled closer to him, your bare skin pressed so beautifully against his. 
This— this was perfect. He didn't think anything else could compare to the feeling of being inside you, so connected to your body and in tune with your emotions. But this… being with you, holding you and caring for you… it was just as beautiful. His heart felt full, and for the first time in months, he didn’t feel restless.
“I meant what I said, you know.” He said, kissing the top of your head. 
You sighed wistfully. “Which part? Because when you said you were going to ‘spend the rest of your existence finding new ways to make me shatter into millions of delicious little pieces,’ I was rather inclined to believe you.” 
He felt his cheeks heat a little. “Ah, well. I meant all of that too. But I’m referring to something I said earlier on in the evening.”   
Your voice was wavering, and he could see sleep pulling at you, tugging you into its embrace one sleepy blink at a time. “Which part, my love?” 
His chest still fluttered at those words, despite both of your endless proclamations of devotion and love last night, he was still so blissful at the prospect of being yours, of you being his. His love. 
“The bit where I told you that I would give you all of me until the end of time. That I’ll give you everything.” 
“Mm,” you said, eyes closed and words loose. “I know.” 
He ran his hands along your back, his skin finally calmed down closer to the end of the night, his scales and claws retracting and freeing his fingers for nefarious purposes. But now, he was enjoying feeling your smooth skin against his own. 
“I have things I must do, duties to this realm beyond that of my role as Iudex. It will be a long and perilous road, a road uneasy for myself and those I love. But in this, as in every other aspect of my life— I feel as though if you stood beside me, it would lighten the burden. You make every part of my life better, and I would be honored to have you beside me for the rest of time.” 
He wasn’t sure how, but if he could free the people of Fontaine from their curse, surely he could find a way to keep you with him, if you so wished. 
“Your voice is pretty,” you sighed. “I love you,” you were mumbling, and he realized you were already rather deep in the clutches of sleep, likely not even hearing a word he’d said. 
He smiled, breathing out a sigh as he kissed the top of your head once more. 
“Sleep well, my darling.” 
La Fin.
—————————————————————
Authors Note: remember to drop a comment with your thoughts! I love you guys so much 🖤
686 notes · View notes
in-act-ive · 9 months
Note
Yo can I request the Gallagher boys (not Liam) and Mickey headcanons if U do them (all separately) with a male reader who's more domimant and taller (sorry I can't spell) in the relationship like they also have to be the big spoon or whatever reader always pulls them in to his lap or something nothing sexual
Thank you if U can't do multiple characters can U do lip or Mickey
I'm real sick of the fics where the male reader it still feminine y'know
Have a nice day sorry for the long request
I had so many ides for this the moment you asked!
Request : yes
Type : headcanon
A / N : hope this is what you wanted!! Sorry it took so long btw, I got sick really fast and couldn't write!
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Carl Gallagher
At first he's very confused by whats going on
After a few times he gets used to sitting in your lap and does it instinctively
Carl hates that you're taller in every way
He's probably a brat to you
He insists on getting stuff he can't reach even if you've offered to help
Carl is very independent and says he doesn't need your help
When he does need your help he's such a bitch about it
He does like having his scary dog privileges though to be honest
If he's about to go do shady shit he drags you along to scare anyone off who may try and fuck with him
When he's a police officer he insists on protecting you
Oh how the tables have turned
When you spoon him he definitely pulls your hands up to his chest so he can hold your hands
After a while he just lets you lay your hands wherever you'd like
He's comfy with whatever
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Lip Gallagher
He won't admit it but he kinda likes that you're taller than he is
The first time he sits in your lap he's flustered as hell but continues to flirt with you
After a few times its still a little awkward but he won't admit it
He just insists on not doing it
He uses your height to his advantage
The moment he doesn't feel like reaching something he bothers you to grab it for him
He finds it hilarious that you are too tall for the Gallagher house
He likes to tease you when you hit your head on stuff or trip on something
His love language is most definitely teasing
When you both go out he kinda acts like you're not there
When he gets into fights you have to save him half the time
When he confronts bitches of men he almost always has you standing around incase it doesn't go his way
The moment you two cuddle and you spoon him he gets kinda pissed off
He'd much rather face you
He does feel protected in your arms but won't say that
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Ian Gallagher
Ian is already the tallest Gallagher and is too tall for their house but having you around makes him jealous
He is confused when you pulled him into your lap
He's not opposed to the idea of sitting with you but he also really doesn't seem to know what to do with himself
Once he's used to it and knows a comfortable way to sit its one of his favorites
He won't admit it
He insists on getting everything himself no matter if you can reach it or not
He probably warns you before you run into a doorway cause he knows what its like
He hates PDA
Especially holding hands
Mainly because he hates feeling like the shorter guy in any relationship
Even if he is
The moment you spoon him he says something dumb
"No. No we're not doing this."
He wants to be the big spoon but you object to that idea
Finally you compromise on you both facing each other
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Mickey Milkovich
He doesn't mind your height at all
Everyone is always taller than him anyways ao your height is just something about you
He thinks its attractive but obviously wont say his feelings
The moment you pulled him into your lap he immediately was fine with it
When he sat in your lap he sat like a king on his throne
Mickey gets so used to it and does it absentmindedly
He will push you into a chair just to sit in your lap no matter how busy you may be
When you guys go out of the house he loves having his "scary dog privileges"
He knows when it comes down to a fight he'd probably kick someones ass for you though
He loves when you hold him or touch him in public
Then he knows that your his and he's yours no matter what
Plus he finds it fucking hilarious when you have to tell people to go away cause you're together
When it comes to cuddling he loves when you spoon him
Its his favorite thing ever
When you don't he makes you no questions ask
Note: This was not spell checked nor grammer checked! I apologize in advance for the mistakes
939 notes · View notes
zvdvdlvr · 11 months
Note
Hi there, friend . Please write if you have time a Soap, Ghost, Price, Alejandro, and Konig headcanons about a male partner with really big veiny hands.Hope you have a pleasent day or night .
- 141, alejandro, and könig with a male partner with large hands
☆ - warnings :: some nsfw topics, coarse language, neck snapping, features sub!könig, usual call of duty violence, male reader, short HCs,
☆ - characters :: john "soap" mactavish, simon "ghost" riley, captain john "bravo six" price, alejandro vargas, könig
☆ - k.j.'s diary says... i haven't written for CoD that much so i apologize for any inaccuracies or any out of character-ness.
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kyle "gaz" garrick
SLUT ME OUT, SLUT ME OUT, SLUT-SLUT-SLUT ME OUT
bro was flabberghasted when he saw you gloveless- like, yes, he knows your hands are huge because of how easily you handle massive weapons but god almighty kyle almost started drooling when he saw you flex your hand while stretching your arm
silently admires the way you move in battle, your melee attacks, hand-to-hand, etc.
when you are dating, gaz for sure hints at his attraction to your hands if that wasn't obvious
gets turned on when you pin him to the ground while sparring and it shows
goes off on tangents about your hands when drunk
"they just- *hiccup* -they look so good, y'know? they'd look really nice around my ne-neck" (bro was passed out not even half an hour after saying this)
simon "ghost" riley
encourages you to snap someone's neck while out on the field
"christ, y/l/n" ghost (the first time he saw you do that
was drinking tea the first time he got a hood look at your bare hands
needless to say, tea was spilled in simon's lap
when you're together simon would come up with all these bullshit reasons to see your bare hands
not really into being choked, but would love watching you choke someone out
would ask you if you could choke-slam people
the answer was yes
simon loves being flipped off by you idk he thinks its hot
i like to think that while off duty simon can be a little bitch sometimes so whenever he turns around to go sulk he LOVES when you grab onto his belt loop or whatever and turn his ass around
captain john "bravo six" price
tried to keep his cool
also kept really quiet about his feelings
like
quiet.
loves holding your hand when off duty
so let's say price is the typa guy to enjoy back hugs? even better when he looks down to see your hands wrapped around his middle
has you demonstrate ways to snap/break necks to the newbies while watching with absolute adoration
did i mention price loves hand holding? i did? ok well just reminding you
u dont have to have big hands to know john loves kissing you with one of your hands in his hair and another tugging his belt loop so he's closer to you. hawt.
john "soap" mactavish
smiles widely while watching you snap someone's neck like it's nothing
doesn't even care if you choke him out if you did at least it's by your hands
choking kink question mark exclamation point
loves getting neck/upper back massages (non sexually you pervs) especially after a long day
a true simp.
will praise you till the end of time no matter how many war crimes you commit on the field
johnny likes when you help him trim/maintain his hair
it's such an intimate thing for him and the fact that you're helping take care of something so personal to johnny makes his heart swell
alejandro vargas.
will absolutely bring attention to the fact that your hands are massive
wolf whistles, even.
alejandro thinks it's the greatest thing ever making you flush
absolutely gushes to rudy about it
ok so now ur in a relationship:
ONE TIME alejandro was getting a bit too big for his britches so you stalked up to him and grasped his neck lightly. (if ur taller than him is what im imagining but wtv) ale was turned on
always wants to be touching you or you touching him
when he has free time he'll come find you, cuddle, play with your fingers while tou watch a movie or something
thinks about you jerking him off when you're both in a meeting or in a semi-public space
practically sings praises about how he loveloveloves your hands
könig
ok if your hands are larger than his than yes bro would pass tf out when he realized
would be very quiet about his attraction to your hands but his obvious staring spoke volumes
would immediately want to be slutted out when you had sex with him
plays with your hands when he's bored or really anxious
REALLY into you holding him by his neck and showing you how much he wants to be taken care of
loves when you tend to any sore muscles or wounds
honestly könig wants a simple, domestic life with all of the things hes seen
HAND HOLDING IS A MUST‼
watches you disassemble, clean, and reassemble guns like you didn't have ur fingers in his mouth the night before with a lopsided smile
you both spar together, learning from each other and being the duo that no other trio or group want to fight
together, you both are unstoppable. the admiration and personal connection you both have baffles many
1K notes · View notes
supernovafics · 15 days
Note
I know in the I’ll be there for you universe it’s been established that reader and Steve both have not great relationships with their parents - was wondering how Steve would comfort reader if she had a bad go of it with her dad or mom or both angst and comfort?? Maybe this is too self serving tho so feel absolutely so free to ignore 😭
𝐒𝐈𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐒𝐄𝐒
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"i'll be there for you" universe masterlist
pairing: bestfriend!roommate!steve harrington x fem!reader
word count: 1.5k words
warnings: explicit language, brief(ish) mention of reader’s mom being shitty, a bit of angst/sadness but with a wholesome ending<3
summary: in which you’re upset and steve tries to cheer you up
author's note: thank you thank you for the request!! i went back to fall for this one because it just felt fitting. enjoy<333
general note: everything in this universe/series can be read as standalone oneshots but to understand the full “lore” it would prob be best to read the other stuff too<333
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
Fall 1985
There was something wrong, but Steve couldn’t tell what it was.
You’d been holed up in your room ever since he got home from his Family Video shift. 
At first, he thought it was something he had done, accidentally leaving Harold’s cage open or forgetting to put something away in the kitchen. But, you didn’t seem mad or upset with him; and he knew that if you were, you wouldn’t have shied away from saying something.
When he knocked on your door and asked what was wrong, he didn’t entirely believe your simple head shake and one word response of “Nothing,” but he decided not to press you further because he knew that you’d come to him whenever you were ready to talk about what was going on. But then hours went by and you didn’t say anything; you even passed up his offer to make a grilled cheese for you, which you usually never did. And that made him worried. 
The time was nearing ten and the only moment you had come out of your bedroom since he got home at six was to grab a quick snack from the kitchen. Maybe you were sad about another crush that had gone wrong or maybe it was something bigger. Steve had no idea, but he felt like he needed to do something for you.
He grabbed a random hoodie from his room and then went over to yours, knuckles tapping against your shut door a few times. When you let out a loud enough, “Yeah?”, he took that as his cue to go in. You were sitting at your desk, textbook and notebook opened up in front of you. 
Steve tossed the hoodie into your lap. “Come on, let’s go.” 
You looked up at him, confused. “Where are we going?”
“It’s a surprise,” He said instead of actually answering your question.
Even though all you really wanted to do was continue wallowing in your room and keep half-focusing on an assignment that you couldn’t care less about, you decided not to protest his words and adamance.
You pulled his hoodie over your head and slipped on a pair of shoes before following him out of the apartment. 
The drive was quiet and you weren’t in the mood to fiddle with the radio, so it simply stayed on a station that seemed to play the same five “pop hits” on repeat. 
It wasn’t until the final few minutes of the ride that you realized where he was driving to. The roads and turns he made started looking way too familiar, and a small smile took over your face when he pulled into the Dairy Queen parking lot. The closest one was over thirty minutes away and Steve hated driving to it because of that, but you never minded it because even though its menu pretty much resembled the dessert menu of your and Steve’s beloved Third Street diner, there was something about this place that you loved too. 
You were always reminded of the summer when you finally got your license and you’d force Steve to come here with you most nights. You two would eat the ice cream in your car, or at one of the red tables that sat outside if it was warm enough; you loved those memories.
Steve put the car in park and then looked over at you. “I’ll grab everything. Do you want your usual?” 
Instead of answering his question, you inadvertently burst into tears. 
“Hey, what’s wrong?” He asked softly as he unbuckled his seat belt and reached over to hug you. It was an entirely awkward and uncomfortable position, but you still immediately leaned into him, arms circling around his neck and face burying into his shoulder. You didn’t mind the way the center console was harshly poking into your side, or the fact that your own still buckled seat belt was in the way. “I thought that coming here would definitely cheer you up. Did I completely misread everything?” 
All you could respond with right then was a barely audible “I’m sorry,” and then you sniffled and let out a breath that only made you cry harder. 
“No, I’m the one that should be saying sorry,” Steve said as he soothingly rubbed your back and the subtle action managed to calm you down a bit. 
You shook your head at his words before pulling out of the embrace and looking at him through blurry eyes. 
“Okay, please be a thousand percent honest with me right now,” You said, somehow finding your voice. You half-heartedly wiped away your tears with the sleeve of Steve’s hoodie. “Do you think I’m selfish?”
“What? No, of course not,” The certainty in his tone managed to wash away some of the shittyness you’d been feeling for the past few hours. “Why would you think that?”
You looked away from him then and slumped back against your seat. “I was on the phone with my mom earlier, maybe like an hour before you got home. She asked me to come to this work event for my dad on Friday night, like some sort of dumb party thing. I said that I can’t since I already told you that I’d go with you to take the kids to that new arcade a few towns over. And honestly, even if that wasn’t happening I’d still probably make up some excuse to not go because I hate going to those work parties. But, anyway, my mom called me selfish for saying no, and I know it’s stupid, it’s so stupid, to believe her, but there was a part of me that did. And still kinda does.” 
Usually, most of the things that your mom said to you went in one ear and then out the other, but for some reason, this comment managed to stick. You started overthinking things, feeling like the worst person ever because of something that wasn’t even true, but maybe it was? And you couldn’t stop thinking about that.   
Steve grabbed your hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. “You’re not. I promise.” 
You found yourself believing him and how sure he sounded. He was probably the only person you’d always believe entirely without question because he knew you better than anyone else. You suddenly felt stupid for thinking that your mom was right in the first place. 
“I’m sorry,” You mumbled and then met his gaze again. “This is all so dumb. I’m sorry that you only drove here because I’ve been acting like a sad idiot for the past few hours and you were trying to cheer me up.”
He shook his head and gave you a small smile. “What do you mean? I love coming here.”
You let out a breath of a laugh. “You don’t, but thanks for pretending.”
“Do you want me to get you something?”
You nodded and smiled at him. “The usual, please.”
“Okay,” He said before stepping out of the car.
Because of how late it was and since it was the middle of the week, there was no one in line aside from two teens and an older woman, so Steve was back in less than ten minutes with a simple vanilla cup with rainbow sprinkles for you and a cone for himself.
“Thank you,” You said as he also handed over the spoon and napkins that he had stuffed in the pocket of his jacket. 
“Remember those promises we would make when we were kids?” He asked and you were quick to nod, immediately knowing what he was referring to. 
You inwardly smiled as you thought about the slightly elaborate “running away” plans you two made when you were twelve and thirteen. It would always happen after he’d have some sort of disagreement with his parents, particularly his dad, and he’d sneak over to your house in the middle of the night. Or any night you found it hard to sleep because your thoughts were consumed by your parents and all of the pressure they put on you to do well in school, so you’d go to Steve’s place because talking with him was the only way to wash away some of your stress. 
“I still stand by all of it,” He continued. “One of us says the words and we leave. No questions about it. I still don’t know where we’re going, but we’ll figure it out on the way.”
It felt less likely to happen now because you two technically had “left;” moved out on your own. Not necessarily far away, but far enough from your parents that the shit that used to be almost too unbearable became a little bit easier; mainly because you two had each other. And moments like this one only further proved that— you’d always be there for one another. However, that didn’t change the fact that those silly little promises still always stood. 
You smiled at him. “I think our plans had something to do with joining a circus.”
You weren’t sure which of you had suggested it, but you still found it funny either way. 
“Ah, yes, the circus idea,” Steve nodded, laughing a bit. “Not one of our best ones.”
“Oh, wait, actually, I think we either said circus or rodeo.”
“Both equally bad ideas, but I’d still do it for you.”
“And I’d do it for you too,” You told him before eating another scoop of your ice cream. “Hey, I know it’ll probably be midnight by the time we get home, but is the grilled cheese offer still on the table?”
He nodded. “Of course.”
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。. .・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.
let me know ur thoughts<333
(requests are open for stuff you wanna see in the universe/series!🫶🏾)
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izvmimi · 1 year
Text
cw: minors dni. melancholic. thoughts on aging. implied impending marriage.
You’ve asked Malleus once, as a joke, what would happen if you aged.
“Will you still love me when I’m no longer young and beautiful?” you sang, the whisper of your voice not unlike the rustling leaves of the swaying trees lining your path. As you remember it now, it was a cold evening in early November, and his hand seemed to turn to ice around yours and tighten suddenly, as though you were to slip through his fingers any moment, blown away by the wind. He stopped walking, and so did you, and you looked into his eyes with surprise, sensing that perhaps you had misspoken. Was he upset?
He looks down at you, and his face is the opposite side of the pale moon. He doesn’t speak.
“Mal…?” you whisper.
He grits his teeth. In the dark, you can feel his body stiffen then finally relax with a sigh. 
“I will love you forever,” he answers finally. It seems to calm him to say this, an ease setting into his bones. “Forever,” he repeats to you, and perhaps to himself. 
You have never forgotten that day.
However, the passage of time is inevitable, and thus, years have passed.
He calls you the fairest of all roses and you love him, remembering all the while that flowers wilt, while he, like the sun or the stars, remains everlasting. He has been here since you were a figment of your mother’s imagination, and he will continue to exist when you fade into dust.
And yet, a ring of emeralds, diamonds and rubies, arranged almost in a bouquet, sits on your finger, and you fiddle with it nervously as you are introduced to Briar Valley as its future Queen. How long will your reign last? How long will you be by his side?
“As long as I walk this earth,” he whispers into your ear. It’s part of a spell, something ancient, and the fine hairs on your neck stand on end. 
You’ve been dressed up and paraded throughout this land so foreign to you. The curious stares of the townspeople have impressed upon you enough - the human who has caught the Prince’s heart! - but they are nothing compared to the way Malleus watches you now. Even if you can’t see him from where he stands behind you, half of his dragon features return to him in his bare state, strong tail wrapped around your midsection, you can feel the gaze.
He says something in an ancient language, and his lips press onto your neck. 
“We will exist together.”
Another kiss. His hands settle on your belly to replace his tail around your waist, which now slides between your thighs. In claws shockingly gentle on your tender, fragile skin, runes are transcribed. A seal remains where his fingers work, glowing as the burning magic sets in.
Tears fall from your eyes as you realize what he’s done. 
“It’s not worth it just to keep me young,” you insist. You would turn to protest, glaring at him for his sacrifice, if it weren’t for the fact that he still holds you so tightly.
“I don’t care about your youth, just that you’re mine,” he repeats. He's said it so many times before.
Teeth graze at your neck, and fangs sink, hard, and you cry out with pain, slowly abating as more magic is forced through your skin and courses through your veins. 
“It’s not worth it,” you sob, as you feel yourself transform. 
“It is.”
Malleus turns you so that you are facing him and the green of his eyes shine especially bright as he gazes upon you now. Your whole body seems to be aflame as your souls tie together.
He shouldn’t do this, but faes have before, and will continue to do so until the end of time. 
Your heart pounds as your chest presses against his and you realize that they beat in time.
“Do you even know how many years you gave up?” you murmur into his skin, the warmth in  your cheeks now faded. Perhaps Malleus has finally rubbed onto you permanently, because now you seem to have lost track of time, your prince kissing and caressing you through the remainder of the process.
 You will never be fae, but you are something else now. 
“They would be years without you. I have no desire to worry about things that are meaningless.”
Malleus’ fingers intertwine with yours and he kisses them tenderly.
The answer is yes. He’ll love you when you’re no longer young and beautiful.
He loves you enough that till death, and truly, till both of your deaths, do you part. 
3K notes · View notes
I keep going to the river to pray
Written for the March pop-up challenge of the @steddieholidaydrabbles
Prompt: spring
Rated: M
Tags: Italian Steve Harrington; naiad Eddie Munson; past lives
CW: child molestation (not from MC); nudity; fade to black sex
Notes: Moooom, hype is turning the blorbos into water creatures again!
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Steve is five years old and the water whispers to him. 
“Steven, come back inside,” Mom scolds and yanks sharply on his hand. “Nonna told you the woods are off limits. The water is too dangerous. Heavens, I can't leave you alone for two seconds, can I?” 
Steve wants to cry. To thrash and kick and scream at the injustice of it all.
Because she is leaving him alone. All alone in this strange country where there's nothing fun to do and where nobody speaks his language, for an entire summer. How's he even supposed to listen to Nonna when he doesn’t understand her half the time? 
The only place where he finds comfort is the spring. The little pond with its crystal waters surrounded by crumpled pillars. He doesn’t know why, just knows there's something here that calls to him. 
Mom doesn't understand, and Steve is too small to fight as she drags him away. Something splashes behind them, like a large stone sinking underwater, but by the time he turns, all he can see is ripples on the surface. 
He doesn’t know why he says it, because there's nobody here. Nobody he can see. It feels like the right thing to do, though. 
“Don't worry,” he whispers to the water. “I'll be back, promise.” 
The water whispers back. 
*
Steve is thirteen and a man follows him into the woods. He's been lurking in corners and doorways in the village all day, smiling, staring, speaking saccharine words in broken English. 
Pretty boy, sweet boy, come here. 
By the time Steve notices he's trailing behind him on the lonely road in the fading daylight, it's too late to cry for help. He ducks into the shelter of the trees without thinking, not looking back when he hears the man give chase. Darkness is falling around him, but he doesn’t need to see. 
All he needs to do is follow the pull. 
The spring reflects the moon and stars, silver waves bouncing off the trees and pillars. 
“Help me,” Steve whispers, just as a hand grabs his wrist and spins him around. 
The man's face is a mask of primal hunger. His eyes glint, dark and unblinking- 
-and then they catch on something behind Steve's back and bulge. All the color drains from his face. He stumbles back, releasing Steve’s wrist, muttering a word in Italian that he doesn’t understand. Then, he turns and runs. 
Steve stares after him, heartbeat roaring in his ears. By the time he remembers to look behind him, there's nobody there. The spring lies silent in the starlight, but the water isn't smooth anymore. A circle of ripples is spreading, not far from where he's standing, waves lapping against the shore. Steve imagines he sees something slipping out of sight in the water, like dark tendrils of seaweed. Then he blinks and it's gone. 
Steve smiles.
“Thank you,” he murmurs softly. 
*
The water murmurs back. 
Steve is eighteen and everything is bullshit. He perches on a fallen pillar, toes dangling in the water, watching the sunset behind the trees, and feels sorry for himself. 
He can't protect his heart from being broken, can't get into college, can't even get his parents to love him. They probably believe they're punishing him by sending him back here, he thinks with a laugh. Idiots. They know nothing about him, nothing about the pull he feels towards this place. He's been feeling it more and more lately, even with an entire ocean between them. 
“Have you finally come to stay, sweetling?” 
Steve doesn’t startle. Simply blinks back from his thoughts and lowers his gaze, like it's always been the two of them out here. Maybe that’s true. 
“You're not scared,” the boy from the spring observes. His head is poking out of the water between Steve’s legs, long dark hair brushing his ankles. He's naked under the water, skin pale and smooth as marble. “Do you not fear me?” 
“Why would I? You've never given me reason to.” 
The language that slips from his lips is strange. Not English. Something closer to the butchered Italian he's picked up over the years. He frowns, briefly, but the boy's lips - pink and full and glistening with tiny droplets - curl into a smile and he forgets to wonder about it.
“Clever child.” Long fingers curl around Steve's calves, sliding up his legs. “I'd never harm what's mine.” 
The fingers slip under the hem of Steve's shorts, gracing his inner thigh, and he gasps. 
“Yours?” 
The boy hums, pulling himself from the water a little, so that his shoulders emerge. His hair is a dark, tangled halo around his pretty face. It tickles Steve’s skin as the boy noses along the inside of his knee.
“Yes, mine. You feel it, do you not? The pull.” 
Steve nods breathlessly and the boy smiles against the soft flesh of his thigh. 
“Of course you do, sweetling. It has been forever since I met someone as responsive, but you? You remember, don't you?” 
Steve pauses. Is that what pulls him here? Memories of a time he shouldn’t recall? Of a place far more splendid than the crumbling ruins around them, a place filled with song and laughter and the strange but familiar language that keeps tumbling from his mouth? 
The boy - the god - watches the shift in his face and smiles. Nimble hands settle on his hips, pulling him closer, and Steve slings his arms around slender shoulders as the pillar slips out from under him. 
His god's eyes are bright as he walks them to the middle of the pond. 
“It has been so long, sweetling, and I hunger for worship. Will you give yourself to me again?” 
“I do not need to,” Steve smiles as he is slowly lowered into the cool waters. “You've always had me.” 
His god smiles and pulls him in, and Steve sighs against those beautiful lips. 
The water welcomes him home. 
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In Roman mythology, naiads (better known under the name of their Greek counterparts, nymphs) are nature spirits most commonly associated with water, guarding rivers, springs and the like. Some were worshipped as local deities, with shrines built in their honor.
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noellefan101 · 6 months
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Could I request the Sumeru boys with a super doting s/o who loves to cook for them? In her eyes, nothing breaks her heart more than seeing the boys hungry and tired.
Characters: Cyno, Tighnari, Alhaitham, Kaveh, Wanderer(, + Albedo) x female reader(i didn´t know if you wanted gn or female, but you said 'her' so i just guessed, i´ll change it if you want(its not really there anyway))
Summary: Them with a reader that likes to cook/what you do when they come home tired/hurt
Warnings: kissing, maybe ooc, not proof-read, hugging from behind,
Note: thank u for requesting anon, i loved the idea, if i missed anyone pls let me know. sorry i was a "little" late though(i also tried smt new, hope you like it). i also realized that i like when people hug me from behind vize versa(someone pls hug me, omg), i luv youuuuu
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Cyno
he had just come home after a tiring mission out in the desert, and he looked worn out, with bruises here and there, and bags under his eyes. you almost cried at his state when you saw him, and immediately got some bandages in case he was badly hurt. but after you gave him the bandages you went back to cooking, you couldn't let it burn after all. but then told him to sit in the kitchen so you can help him while cooking.
he was confused at first but just went with it and sat on one of the kitchen chairs, the smell of your cooking comforting him more and more as he got closer to the kitchen. he almost forgot how calming your presence was, but its a happy surprise every time. he always loved your cooking so him coming home to you cooking his favorite meals in the kitchen, ready to greet him with one of your brightest smiles, it was like seeing the sun for the first time in months, even though it had only been a week.
knowing your love language was cooking, he always accepted your food, wanting to show that he liked when you loved him, and that he loves you too.
"cyno? you ok?" he got caught off guard when you spoke out to him, he didn't realize he had been staring at you, and immediately apologize. "o-oh yeah im fine sweetie, sorry" "hm, its fine, dinner´s ready" you smiled at him, and he felt like he fell in love all over again. but realizing he didn't have time to space out again (tho he wanted to) he just started eating. enjoying the food you made just for him, while thinking about when he finally would get the guts to propose.
Tighnari
it had been a long day in the forest, along with most of the trainees not listening to his lectures and some just strait up ignoring him(not Collei ofc, your sweet baby child, (with Cyno as the unfunny uncle)). in short, he had a really bad day and had little to no energy left.
but he didn´t even realize he was so tired until he practically saw your heart break in half in your eyes when you saw him. it really pained him to see you like that, little did he know you hurt more. you were almost done cooking when he got home and unfortunately couldn´t tend to him right now(+ Nari would scold you if left it alone, and tended to him instead). so you just asked him to walk over to you instead and gave him a little kiss on the cheek to hopefully restore some of his energy.
it did help him a little bit with calming down, you always did, but this time he may have gotten a little greedy and went in to give you a kiss on the lips in return. "Tighnari, not right now. do you want dinner or not, im sure Collei wants some" he laughed a little at your words(and at your red cheeks) "of course i´d like some dinner, Collei as well. but cant i kiss my beautiful girlfriend/partner" you looked back at him, glaring a little.
"fine, but- mhmph" your sentence got interrupted by another kiss from him. when you pulled away your cheeks were completely red, "Nari, stop that, at least eat first" he looked at you in amusement, "fine i´ll eat first" he ended the sentence with a sigh. "good you better, and after you need sleep, you have bags under your eyes" you went back to cooking. "sure, whatever you say gorgeous" he looked at you(with hearts in his eyes) and you looked back at him "thank you, handsome"
Alhaitham
he had been reviewing some scholar's papers today, and it was definitely not his favorite. some lacked the correct knowledge about the right things to focus on, some the papers lacked effort, and some couldn´t even be called proper papers. yeah, he didn´t have a very good day, some random guy even dared demand a meeting when he clearly was very busy doing something else.
when he opened the door to your home, he was instantly met with the delicious smell of your cooking. but it seemed like you didn´t hear him since you weren´t running to him like you normally would, or maybe you were just too focused on cooking. but that didn´t matter to him right now because he, for once, just wanted to have you in his arms. when he walked into the kitchen, and catching you by surprise at the same time, he only walked up to you and hugged you from behind, burying his face into your neck.
you didn´t look at him, but if you did you´d see just how tired he really was, you were just a little too focused on cooking it seemed. he just stood there hugging you for a bit, looking at whatever you were doing, though he didn´t really pay attention, and he almost fell asleep right then and there if you hadn´t called out to him. "Haitham, i´m almost done cooking, can you put plates on the table" you took him out of his thoughts and even surprised him a little, "o-oh, yeah i can do that, love".
you looked over at him, only now realizing how tired he was "Actually i can do that, you don´t have to. just go sit down" he looked at you "are you-" "yes im sure. Go sit down" you looked him in the eyes like a mother did when she was angry at her kid, "of course" he looked away from you. "thank you, i love you" "...love you too"
Kaveh
yes, he has been working non-stop on this project from a client. it wasn´t even due til in a month or so, but still, there he was in his office looking over the many sketches that got declined. some were too detailed some too simple, and there was the ones where the client didn´t like the style, even though it was exactly what he asked for... he could go on for hours and hours about how frustrated he was.
you were just going into his office to check on him and to give him some water, but when you saw how tired and hungry he looked (he hadn't eaten in, like, hours)you quickly gave him the water and went out to the kitchen before he even realized you were there. you started finding the ingredients even before you fully entered the kitchen, already knowing the recipe since you´ve made it so many times for him.
an hour later it was already done and you were about to get a plate and give it to him in his room, but it seemed like the smell of the food brought him to you instead. because there he stood, behind you hugging your waist and now that you took a better look at his face, your heart broke a little. he looked so tired and half dead if you were to ask Alhaitham.
you quickly gave him the plate and dragged him out into the dining room, "you need to stop forgetting to eat, mister" it almost scared him with how harsh your voice was at that moment. "-m sorry" you looked at him, your eyes softening a little this time " it´s fine, I'm just worried about you y´know" he laughed a little "i know, i love you" you looked over at him, a bit sharper this time "love you too, idiot".
Wanderer
He doesn't need to eat, he´s a puppet, you know that. yet you still make him food every time he comes home from classes at the Akademiya, when he looks extra tired from working on his thesis last night therefore he didnt get any sleep. he doesnt understand why you do this for him, why you make him tea all the time when he didn't even ask. he doesnt understand you.
But his heart still beat in his chest, despite not being there, when he saw your pained face as he walked into your shared home. his tired state for once showing in his face. he had been going a little too overboard with a thesis and also didn't realize the time until Buer came to get him/since you were worried about him, in your mind/. and then sent him home, both to his liking and his dismay.
you practically ran over to him, and then dragged him into the kitchen to then also force him to sit down and explain himself. he may have memories of being in the Fatui, but he still thought you like this was scarier. your normally sweet and kind personality gone, turned into something reminding him of La Signora and The Knave(+himself(or even Dottore)).
let's just say it wasn't the nicest experience but you eventually calmed down a little, the worry now showing more than when he walked into your shared home. "you need to stop overworking, Kuni", he gave out a sigh at your antics "i know, I'm sorry for worrying you" he mumbled the last part, and if you hadn´t been right next to him you wouldn´t have heard it. "well, now you need to eat, you cant say no this time. oh yeah, i´ll also make you some tea if you´d like" he was glad to see that you were back to normal "Thanks, I´d like some tea, i guess". you laughed a little "of course, coming right up, now eat" he shivered a little at your sharp tone when you said the last part " *sigh* fine".
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Extra; Albedo
its not like he wanted to worry you, he was just a little too invested in the experiment he was working on, in Dragonspine no less. so he ended up forgetting to stop and go home and instead worked himself to near death(who doesn´t, right). and when you went to check on him he didn´t even notice you, so you decided to surprise him in a hug from behind, while being careful not to ruin anything that was in front of him.
he doesn´t hate it when you surprise him, oh no, you just caught him off guard. and he definitely didn´t expect you to visit him today, but he enjoyed you being here and hugging him. he didn´t realize he had been lost in thought while staring at you til you asked him if he was okay, and to be fair he wasn´t really ok, but he said yes anyway.
"are you sure?" the question caught him off guard for the second time that hour, " *sigh* to be honest, no im not sure" he turned around and hugged you back. "are you hungry?! i can cook something if you´d like..." you looked at his face, there were bags under his eyes and he didn´t look as pretty as he normally did(he still looked pretty tho/im so very not normal abt this man/) "... you look tired, bedo. i can cook you something and then you need to sleep" you looked at him again, this time you looked more serious.
"but-" you stared at him sharply, " *sigh* -fine, I´ll eat and then sleep, but only if you do too" you smiled brightly at him "deal". you then untangled yourself from his arms and ran over to your bag to get your spices, you then started finding the eatable ingredients you have stored in his lab. after you forced made him eat something, you dragged him to bed. the experiment can wait anyway.
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thank you for reading, had a lot of fun writing this so hope you enjoyed, luv ya-Masterlist
You are welcome to reblog and like any of my posts, but you CAN NOT translate, copy or hate on anybody for liking my posts
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dcxdpdabbles · 8 months
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I got the Passion For Fashion brainworms, and since you're guilty for it you WILL get my headcannons.
Since Clockwork made them know spanish as if it was their first language, they only talk in spanish with eachother, more often than not completely forgetting that they are talking in SPANISH.
Danny and Dan like bickering and banter but since they were basically eachother once upon a time they know eachother's limits perfectly. That causes them to say a lot of agressive and downright nasty stuff to eachother so it always sounds like they hate eachother and are constantly fighting.
Clockwork gave them the "essentials" for making clothes, so Dan will absolutely just spam Danny's phonenwith pictures and descriptions of a sewing gadget or tool and be like "Danny i need this. Please. I know you keep making stuff don't lie to me. I know you can do it so please just make it. Danny we are too poor to buy this. Danny PLEASE I need it" until Danny accepts making the thing in true Fenton fashion.
Danny and Dan making up names for themselves because no sane parent names both of their twins "Daniel"
"I swear to the Ancients I will NOT hesitate to go Cain Instinct on your ass-"
Making fun of Vlad together. Just. Making fun of him in general.
The pmoment Bruce decides to show some interest in the twins Danny go home running and be like "Dan. Dan I fuckked up. Dan there's another billionaire after us. Dan how do I always fuck this up." and since they're both dumbasses they panic together and the batkids (who are most likely listening in with a bug or smth) are all just laughing at Bruce's sour face.
Dan headcannons cuz i love him:
I think that even if they're identical twins, Dan has longer hair with a dark gray streak (cuz of vlad ofc)
even if he is a fashion maker he probably goes everywhere wearing sweatpants and a hoodie.
Dan forcefully makes Danny do skincare to make his appearance look good but will never even drink a glass of water for his own health.
I love them and spent the entire day without internet so now I'm devoting myself thanks for the content <3<3
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I love all of these!! Its beautiful!
Danny and Dan not realizing they slipped into Spanish is such a mood tbh. Sometimes, my coworkers and I do that, and my non Spanish speaking coworker just stares at us until we snap.
Lowkey they dislike each other, but they also love each other, and no one can tell with the insults they threw. Danny and Dan live and breath the "Only I can be mean to my sibling!"
Danny would make Dan anything he asked for if it meant keeping his Obsession healthy. On the one hand, it gives him something to do and, on the other hand, keeps Dan from jumping off the deep end again. He does get annoyed with Dan spamming him at three in the moring for "A machine that could double bedazzled and polish!"
Both kept their names as Danny and Dan, so neither is Daniel. Clockwork did that when he made their files. He knew if he tried to change their names, both would refuse to answer.
They turned Vlad into a verb. Danny trips over air? "You went and Vlad-ed everything bro" Dan refuses to shower cause he has some embroidery to do? "Ugh you Vlad-ed all of my scent receivers" sometimes when the fight is really big Danny will yell "YOUR JUST LIKE YOUR FATHER VLAD!" and Dan will gasp dramatically before bursting into tears. ( Cause he took Vlad ghost that makes him half vlad and Dan has to live with that)
Bruce would never understand why the twins are more freaked out by Brucie Wayne then Batman. His kids think it's hilarious.
Dan and Danny are identical down to the hairstyle in my au, but That will change with time. Dan will grow out his hair to put it in a man bun, while Danny will cut it short. And yes, Dan wears nothing by sweats or PJs. He doesn't care about the clothes after they are finished. He just likes making them.
Dan was a pure ghost for almost ten years before Clockwork messed with his body and threw it back into its teens. He is not used to doing most basic human needs like showering, eating, sleeping, and, of course, drinking water. Danny has to remind him his headache is due to lake of all the things mentioned. That will not stop him from designing a strict beauty regime for Danny, including hourly water intake.
Last little detail, both are terrible at social interactions. Dan beacuse he thinks of himself as a ghost and doesn't like humans so he avoids them if he can and Danny cause he sees everyone as unimportant since he's planning on going home. Neither of them know anything about Batman besides what clockwork told them. As of part 3 they didn't even know he was a vigilante. So this lake of information means they don't know anyhring about the rest of Gotham and that will play a big part in how they react to villains.
Also yes, Dan was being genuinely interested when he flirted with Killer Croc, but that's cause he thought he was a EverBurning. A group of Lizard men in the ghost zone is similar to the FarFrozen society only they live in volcano surrounded by lava.
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