#and i don’t want to leave lucia at home. but things really do feel like they’re better for her when i’m not around

[arthur-r]

yo my mom has covid so she can’t come home on the airplane tomorrow….

#hello????????? #covid tw #she is stranded thousands of miles away #she was visiting her family and now she can’t come home #was not prepared to be in a dad-parented household for this long #when i say dad-parented i mean my dad specifically. dads are good parents but my dad specifically is abusive so!!!! #and mostly he is abusive to my mom and then the rest of us is by association. but it still does get bad when she’s not around too #and it would get EXTRA bad if he heard me calling him abusive so um. y’all are the only people i can say anything to #and things are fine right now they are. but he was mad at my little sister yesterday and again a few days before that #and i was making everything worse by how i reacted to that. so things aren’t looking like they will go very well #i wasn’t planning on starting to stay after all the time this early in the school year…. #and i don’t want to leave lucia at home. but things really do feel like they’re better for her when i’m not around #hopefully everything will just be fine. but idk #also i’m trying to keep myself from staying after school until i’ve at least went to one session of philosophy club like a normal person #and i literally only will start if i actually feel unsafe at home. which has been true many times this summer but we’re not quite there yet #for this time around. so i will chill and i will sit through it and i shouldn’t have to go until my mom gets home #and she can take care of lucia and everything will be just fine. just. yeah idk. things are sure in a way #anyway i have to get back to dinner i’ve been hiding in the bathroom i just couldn’t take it #but i’m starting to be suspicious. so off to dinner i go. love you guys see you later #me. my post. mine. #delete later #abuse mention #anyway i’m fine and okay by the way!!!! like everything’s okay it’s just. a strange time. just don’t worry

[creative-heart]

"My thoughts will echo your name"| Esteban Kukuriczka

Chapter five: “In the dark, we’re barely hanging on”

Lucia’s notes: We finally getting rid of Lucas! yaayy, so in advance, this is gonna be kind of a sad chapter, also, we’re approaching the end of this wonderful fic, only 2 more chapters to go. The section that is completely in italics are Y/N’s memories.

Playlist:

Happier than ever- Billie Eilish

Atlantis- Seafret

Lose you to love me- Selena Gomez

Somewhere only we know- Keane

Traitor- Olivia Rodrigo

Flicker- Niall Horan

Bigger than the whole sky- Taylor Swift

Content Warning: Break up, angst, sadness, drinking (not too heavily).

Word Count: 1.9k

After that night with Esteban, Y/N knew exactly what she needed to do, the blonde had to admit that this was a decision long overdue, it had just taken her to get to this point to realize it. Mastering all the courage she had she called Lucas “Hey, can you come to the apartment? we need to talk” she said as soon as she heard the phone click when her boyfriend picked up the phone.

“Hello, what is there to talk about?” Y/N rolled her eyes at his reply “just come over Lucas” she hung up pacing around the living room her bags already packed by the couch, she was decided to leave, where to, she had absolutely no idea, it wasn’t like she was going to go back to her parents, that door had closed long ago, she couldn’t turn to Amelia either, they might be friends, but she was Lucas’ sister at the end of the day. Y/N kept pacing around until she felt the turn of the keys in the door and stopped in her tracks taking a deep breath before he saw the guy’s face walk into what used to be their shared home.

“Well.. I’m here, wanted to talk? talk, I’ve got plans” Lucas crossed his arms over his chest. Y/N took a deep breath facing him and raised an eyebrow trying to keep the best poker face she could master.

“I think we need to break up, I’m done and tired of feeling like a fly on the wall for you, you haven’t turned to look at me all but twice in the past year almost. You think I don’t know how you’ve been talking to Alma all these years we’ve been together? and no, before you say anything, I didn’t need to go through your phone, but you’re way too obvious. You’ve never let me be myself, whatever I did was wrong, wasn’t good enough”- damn it- she cursed at herself internally when she felt the tears brimming her eyes through her well rehearsed speech. The girl looked away to wipe at her eyes before turning back around. “I deserve more than this, I don’t deserve feeling like the last option on your life, like you’d rather be anywhere but home with me, I’m tired Lucas, I loved you, damn it, even if you don’t deserve it, in some stupid, sad, twisted way I still do. And I do thank you for everything you gave me when we got together, you showed me who I could be, I don’t know what changed, but it’s too late.” Y/N looked at the tall guy frozen in his spot, absolutely gobsmacked blinking slowly “We’re done Lucas, I’m leaving, pease don’t come after me” she whispered grabbing her things and walking out the door as her keys to the apartment rested on the table beside the door.

The brunette turned around looking at her back “wait….Y/N, we can work through this, I’m sure” he said softly, not that he really cared about her, but his family thought she was wife material and her trustfund was pretty steep. Y/N the Hazel eyed girl turned around once more and he knew, he knew then and there that there was nothing left in there for him, she felt nothing. 

Y/N walked out dragging her luggage after her and started walking down the street, not too sure where to. She just knew she needed to get as much distance between her and that apartment as humanly possible; as she walked her mind alternated between playing over images of her relationship with Lucas, how the whole situation had unfolded over the years.

Y/N had just transferred universities to go to law school in the big city, coming from a small town, this had been the plan since she was a kid, she wasn’t too sure if it was hers or her parents plan, but it was the plan. As she walked into her first class, she saw a handsome guy, slightly older than her standing at the front of the room and she headed over “excuse me, is this criminal law 101?” she said barely above a whisper. The guy looked at her, gorgeous brown hair paired with piercing blue eyes, she felt the air escape her lungs. “Yes it is, take a seat, we’re about to begin”, handsome eyes turned out to be the student teacher assistant, Lucas was his name. 

After a few months of just looking at each other across the room in class, he walked up to her after class and smiled “would you go out for a drink with me?” and that’s where it all started. Sweet nothings whispered in her ear wherever they went, holding Y/N while she cried after her parents told her that she would no longer be their daughter if she dared drop out of Law School to pursue photography, he had  held her up when she thought she was gonna fall to her knees.

Y/N didn’t know when, or how, but she had started crying again her tears falling freely down her cheeks, but she wasn’t sure why, she knew breaking up was the right move, she was better off without Lucas. The blonde didn’t realize how she had made her way to Esteban’s building, she looked at the doorbell panel and saw his name pressing the button hoping he’d be home and he’d be available.

“Hello?” she heard his sweet voice over the com and her heart skipped a bit “is anyone there?” shit, she hadn’t replied “Kuku, it’s….it’s me, Y/N” she hiccuped into her end of the com “are you busy? can I please come in?” she whispered.

“Sweetie, are you crying? oh god, of course, come on in” he buzzed the door opened and once he heard the click of the door closing behind her he went and opened the apartment door waiting for her. As soon as Y/N stepped out of the elevator, suitcases behind her and eyes red with tears he frowned and went over hugging her “Hey hey, what happened babe?” the older man said quietly walking them back into the apartment taking the luggage with him, he walked them both to the couch before going to get a cup of tea for Y/N  “what happened Y/N/N? wanna talk about it?”

Y/N looked up at the brown eyed man for the first time since stepping out of the elevator, tears still streaming down her cheeks like rivers and she hated herself for crying like that. She nodded softly “it’s over” the younger whispered “I finally broke up with Lucas” she gulped thick pressing the heels of her hands to her eyes as to suppress the tears to keep erupting. Kuku couldn’t help but feel relieved and almost happy for that to be over, he knew it wasn’t okay, he could tell Y/N was suffering and he wanted to take that away from her, but he was happy about her being single as he handed her the tea and sat down “I have nowhere to go now Kuku” she whispered taking a sup of the tea “I left the apartment, cause it was his name on the lease, and I can’t go to Amelia’s obviously, I can’t go back home to my parents, another of my friends isn’t in a place to take me in, I don’t know what I’m gonna do” Y/N said looking down into the mug swirling it gently.

“You may think this is a bit out there and crazy….but you could always stay here, I don’t mind, you can take my room, I can either sleep here on the couch, or even go to one of the guy’s places, maybe Mati or Fran” Kuku smiled sheepishly “you can stay as long as you want or need to get back on your feet” Y/N didn’t even dare looking at him, she knew too well what kuku’s eyes did to her on this short time of knowing eachother, not like she was in the mood for much right now, but he melted her heart away. Y/N stayed silent for a while, she really liked the idea of sharing a place with this sweet man, but she knew it was way too risky, after what seemed like an eternity for the sweet eyed man, she looked back up to him.

“I don’t wanna be alone tonight, but I would really appreciate it if you could…please don’t feel imposed, go to one of the guys places after, if you don’t want to, or can’t just let me know and I’ll for sure get another place to stay” Y/N downed the rest of her tea as Esteban shook his head “nonesense, you stay here as long as you want” he smiled softly rubbing her back and his touch felt like a warm blanket over her, it always felt so protective and she could stay like this forever. Y/N looked at him and smiled softly “Thank you so much, would it be possible to take a warm shower? I got kinda cold” the older man nodded and pointed her to the bathroom.

That night, after Y/N fell asleep in his arms while watching a movie to try and help her distract herself from the events of that day, Esteban stood up carefully picking the petite girl in his arms walking to his bedroom to lay her down as he tucked her in and kissed her forehead he stood back to his full height grabbing a few things to go settle on the couch for the night and he heard a sleepy voice say quietly “sleep with me please?” God every new thing he discovered about her drove him even more insane, that sweet soft sleepy voice and how angelic she looked while sleeping, he could never say no to this woman and so he laid down with her still fully clothed, he didn’t want her to get the wrong impression as she nuzzled back against him he kissed her head closing his eyes letting her always drunkening scent to wash over him lulling him to sleep.

Four days had gone by and he had been staying with Mati and Male to give Y/N some space, but today, encouraged by the pair he decided to go check in on the blonde girl taking some comfort chinese food with him, if she was anything like Male had suggested, she was probably not eating much. Esteban made his way to his place and knocked ont he apartment door. Soon enough Y/N opened the door, messy bun in her hair, pjs consisting of an old scooby doo t-shirt that was way too big on her and some baggy sweatpants, her eyes widened when she saw the guy standing at the door and she tried fixing her hair “kuku… I …I didn’t except you to come over, come on in”. The guy chuckled softly walking into his place and looked at her “No, you clearly weren’t, sorry to come unannounced, I just wanted to check on you, I’ve brought chinese takeout, and we can order some ice cream after if you want, I know how much you like salted caramel and chocolate” Y/N turned around smiling for the first time in days, how did he remember that? they’d only had ice cream a couple of times. 

As she made some place on the coffee table she looked at the guy again “pick out something to watch? I’ll go get something to put the food in” she took the bag from the tall man and disappeared into the kitchen. If Esteban wasn’t mistaken, the smile she gave him right then wasn’t the same she always had, this was different, and he really wanted to discover more behind it, with no one standing between them, he knew he had to start acting soon, but he didn’t want to rush her into something she wasn’t up to. This was definitely screwing with his head.

P.S: I cringed so bad at this chapter god, so sorry, but it was necessary. Also credits to @cafekitsune for the awesome scene dividers.

taglist:

@madame-fear  @cyliarys-starlight @castawaycherry @luceracastro @espinasrubi @lastflowrr @koiibiito @candycanes19 @nperoconelcositoarriba @lxdyred @deepinsideyourbeing

#esteban kukuriczka fic #esteban kukuriczka fanfic #esteban kukuriczka x reader #lsdln cast fanfic #lsdln cast fic #lsdln x reader #lsdln cast #fanfiction #fic #esteban kukuriczka #angsty fic #reblog

[blog-reflection]

ONE / Twenty Three - Pizza Night

I was petrified, unable to speak.

This waiter was even prettier closeup. I know very well that to be a good looking person you also kind of have to be kind but damn he was fine. The nametag on his chest said. E.O.Green, He/Him. I like it when basically any shop does that, I mean, including the pronounce, very important. E.O. Green…I wonder what his real name is tho? Especially since it appears to be a double name which, personally, I really like.

Waiter: Soo? Everything okay? Lucia: Yeah I’ll pay for both. Waiter: Oh that's some kind of date then? Lucia: OH NO haha. He's a really good friend, and he’s gay so. Waiter: I see, well good to know. Lucia: So, the bill then? Waiter: Oh yeah of course! Here you go. Waiter B: ETHAN, I NEED HELP OVER HERE Waiter: Sorry, just put the money in the book, have a great day. Lucia: Thanks, you too. Lucia: [...] Lucia: JAMES HELLOU???? James: WHAT Lucia: You like, did your body lost your soul for a few here or what was that? James: Haha, what do you mean? Lucia: You were stone. I kicked you under the table like twice, no sign of any reaction. Are you good? James: I had…other stuff to do. Lucia: Like what? James: Thinking about him. Lucia: Well next time just pay attention. His name is Ethan, he brought us the bill that I have to pay. James: Ethan is a really nice name. Lucia: JAMES ARE YOU SANE?! James: Couldn’t be any better. Lucia: Okay you like lovestruck as hell right now. Wait, Idea. You got a pen on you? James: Sure why? Lucia: Just some shenanigans. James: Sure, here. Lucia: Perfect! James: What are you doing? Lucia: I’ll leave him a note. Maybe that calms you.

She was right though, I was love stuck, and not small either. This only ever happened once, back when I used to go to Dover school before I had to move to Truham. But since then, nothing. Lucia laid the bill as well as the money in the book, handed me my pen and both of us went outside, back to campus. I promised I’ll take her to her accommodation before heading home but, if I am honest, I kind of want to drive to Jesse for a quick stop, just for a day or twoo. Since the library is fixed now there shouldn’t be any issues with that. We went into Lucia's home which she usually shares with a roomy, though she’s currently sick at her parents place. Apparently some kind of infarction which, as a biology student, she didn’t want to bring to the entire class. Lucia sat crossed leg on her chair while spinning a view, meanwhile I layed down on the bed and looked at the ceiling. 

Lucia: Sooo, that Ethan huh? You think he’s hot. James: OH MY GOD! Do we really have to talk about that? Lucia: James you haven’t seen yourself it was like, watching you developing a marriage in your mind within three minutes of sight. I’m Italian, you can’t lie to me about love amore. James: Okay. He may or may not be  my type, like almost 100 percent. Lucia: So that’s your type then huh? James: Well, I don’t think I really have a type. But I also only ever had one Boyfriend and he kind of shared the same hair as Ethan does. I don’t know, I'm just confused. Lucia: Yeah, love can be difficult. James: Wrong, feelings can never be good with those kinds of things. Lucia: Kind of guessed that. James: Okay outsh? That was unnecessary. Lucia: I’m just messing around. James: I know I know. Oh, by the way, what have you been writing on the bill? That he can keep the change? Or did you tip him? Lucia: Even better! James: What could be better than a tip? Lucia: I just scribbled your number and discord on the bill.

I istendly spit all my water out again and started heavily caughting.

James: HAVE YOU LOST YOUR MIND?! Lucia: What, if he’s interested he’ll reach out. If not, I tried. James: I couldn’t even talk to him, Lucia. What in the hell am I supposed to do when he really reaches out?! I can’t just start a conversation with *ohh look I’m the weird dude from a few days ago that was too stunned to speak with you* Lucia: Oh my good James for fuck sake calm it! James: CALM YOUR TITTS AND THINK BEFORE YOU DO STUFF HOW ABOUT THAT!?

Lucia remained silent. No counter nothing, she was clearly thinking and processing. I may have overstepped it and went too far but so did she. She’s not mad, or angry, or annoyed. Lucia is the calmest person I know. If she makes a mistake she rather thinks clearly about what to say and how to approach the situation instead of just screaming at you. I really like that of her since I hate to get loud myself. Or well, fighting in general. I’m a pacifist through and through.

Lucia: I’m sorry, I see the error in my thinking. I shouldn’t have done that. James: I guess it’s too late anyways and who knows, maybe he just threw it away. Who knows. I’m also sorry for…wasting your water. Lucia: You don’t have to, it’s tap water anyways. James: At least now I know why it tastes like a rat's ass. Lucia: Blame the school not me. But like, in theory, what if he ends up sliding in your dm’s? James: Throwing my phone out the window while I threw up and sob? Lucia: James…. James: I really don’t know. I never had a date via phone and I totally suck at doing things successfully on the first try. Lucia: If you never try it how will you know that?

She’s right, she almost sounds like Jesse. I hate it. Only time when I use apps for dating it’s because of the need for sexual satisfaction which turns out to be sexual embarrassment and self hate anyways. Ugh…men. As much as I sometimes want a boyfriend, sometimes when a potential person is there I just ignore them. Jesse says I’m too much into red flags which, judged by my count of boyfriends might be true…but still…I lost my point, well done James. Anyhow, I can’t just straight up talk to Ethan like nothing ever happened. The first time we talked was when I was sweating like deer in the Mexican desert. Mexico doesn't have a dessert as far as I’m aware but I’m trying to make a point here. I don’t even know what I should reply. Worst case I just ask Jesse how they would do it. To be fair I actually plan on seeing them later that day anyway so we might even have a lill chatter about that too while we’re on it. Lucia and I just talked for a while, ignoring time or even the fact that the night was slowly making the way into our realm. I’m still trying to wrap my head around everything that has happened today. 

It didn’t take long and the both of us got hungry so we decided to call tonight a pizza night. While Lucia has been fighting with the dude on the telephone rather or not the pizza is an authentic Italian made one, I’ve decided to firstly call Sarah to inform her about me being away for a bit longer and then later sliding in Jesse discord dm’s to inform them that I’ll show up in a few. Lucia was still in a furry when she threw her phone across the room nearly hitting me with it since she planned to throw it into the bed. I calmed her down before she grabbed her laptop to do some studies for uni while we waited for our order to arrive. Meanwhile I was browsing through insta and other apps so I would stay focused as well. Nothing important, and even tho Lucia and I didn’t really talked in that moment it wasn’t awkward or anything like that. It was nice to just be here and knowing that someone is also here. We both recharged in our ways which I found really cool. Until my phone started buzzing. I looked it up and say that I got a discord message. I opened discord since I thought it was Jesse answering me but no. The message was from someone called @GreenOtter. Green Otter? WAIT. E. O. Green. Ethan O. Green. This…this message

THIS MESSAGE IS FROM ETHAN!!!!

#GreenOtter #Pizza Night #quality time #blog.reflection

[the-passenger-if]

A prompt for the angst but!! How would the ros deal/treat/react to a newman that had frequent panic attacks? (If your comfortable answering, and no ones asked before) I imagine since the whole reason we're on earth is because we're trying to hide from this eldritch diety who wants to inhale us whole, and to top it all off newman doesnt even have enough energy to leave. That would cause any being an extreme of stress and anxiety. Especially after Tzr'nekre actually finally locates us

combining it with

if its not too spoilery, how would the ROs react to the MC waking up from a nightmare (say, one in which the RO got possessed by tzr'nekre?) and MC just clings to them, crying, after waking up, and refusing to explain but its obvious they had a terrible nightmare?

This isn’t what Fiama imagined when she was awaken by Newman’s warm face pressing against her breasts, ragged breathing and all. She wants to grab a hold of their head, hold them there, but as her hand brushes their cheek, she finds it damp. Maybe with sweat, maybe with tears.

“Baby?” she asks in a hushed whisper. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

The only reply she gets is a stuttering intake of breath. And then her partner’s arms are sneaking around her—one under her neck, the other around her waist—and Newman is squeezing her tight.

Fiama is strong, she has always been. Her mother once told her—not in kind terms—that she truly took after her father’s sisters; their arms, made to keep children from ripping one another’s eyes out, their legs to carry drunken husbands back home. Now, trapped in Newman’s strong embrace, she feels like the type of dainty, unobtrusive creature her mom wished she had grown into.

She takes a deep breath—as deep as she's able to within her lover’s tight grip—and tries again. “Babe… you’re… crushing me.”

The hold eases up an instant later, but Newman doesn’t let go. They bury their wet face in Fiama’s neck, still silent. It’s alarming to say the least, but she keeps her voice calm. “Are you hurting?” Newman shakes their head. “Are you sad?” She hugs them, feels them shaking in her arms—Newman doesn’t shake like this. “Are you scared?” She didn’t want to sound so flabbergasted (so ‘judgy’ her mother would say) but she can’t help it.

Once again, Newman doesn’t answer, but they do bury their face deeper into Fiama. It takes her by surprise; they have always seemed so unaffected by everything…

She hugs them tight and says the only thing she can think of, “I’m here, babe. And I’ll always be. I don’t know what or who is making you feel like this, but you aren’t alone. I’m with you.” She kisses the top of their head, murmuring every promise she knows she can keep.

A few minutes later, Newman is fast asleep again.

---

Sleeping next to another person in a bed that wasn’t made to be shared by two adults is uncomfortable, but it was late and Newman hadn’t brought their bike, ignoring that Joaquin’s car was at the shop, and Lucia had taken hers that night.

It’s ok, Jonny thinks to himself while he stares at the ceiling, we’ll just wait until my folks leave for work tomorrow. It doesn’t have to get awkward for anyone.

When was the last time he’d shared a bed? Probably when he was around twelve and Quino got scared by a storm and woke him up in the middle of the night, cold hands slipping under the sheets and touching the back of his neck. Dumbass always did the same thing, no matter how many times Jonny punched him to dissuade him. Of course Jonny could never stay mad at his twin for long, and they would share the bed in the end—Jonny grousing about Quino’s cold hands and Quino whining about Jonny hogging the covers.

As if invoking his brother, he feels hands around his neck now; cold, sweaty hands. Even though they don't belong to Quino, the way they’re clinging to him is pretty reminiscent of the way his twin used to squeeze him whenever lightning stroke too close.

“Are you ok?” he asks stupidly. Of course they aren’t; Newman is scared. “What is it?” he tries again, but Newman says nothing, they only keep tightening their grasp around Jonny. He takes their hands and tries to free himself. “Newman, you’re going to choke me.”

Slowly, those cold fingers loosen, giving him a chance to sit up.

“Don’t go!”

“Hush,” Jonny hisses. “Damn it, Newman. Remember we aren’t alone.” He takes the hand that is now gripping the front of his shirt and tries to hold it, but Newman doesn’t budge. “Please,” he whispers.

“Don’t go,” it’s the barely audible plea he gets as a reply.

“I won’t,” he assures them. After another second, Newman lets go, and Jonny takes the hand and gently rubs it between his. “Come here,” he whispers, and Newman doesn’t need to be told twice. They get between his legs and rest on their side and against Jonny’s chest. Jonny takes the covers and pulls them over both of them, and there, with an arm around Newman’s shoulder, he can feel their muscles begin to slowly relax.

---

Roach didn’t usually do this; lying down in bed while their conquests sleep. They had realized that there was so much one could do to pass the time, and watching people drooling was amusing just the first dozen times.

They turn another page of the magazine they stole from that gas station three towns over, the one with the old, balding clerk that had given Roach the evil eye from the moment they dared to set a foot in his territory.

The light is off but that’s ok because Roach doesn’t need it to read, the same way they don’t need it to sneak glances at Newman’s sleeping form. It’s something they do, they tell themself, to pass the time, and not because Newman’s face is nice to look at or anything like that. They aren’t expecting to find their companion awake the next time they look their way, least of all with a terrified look set on their face.

Roach opens their mouth to ask what’s going on, but the words die out as they are wrapped in a tight embrace. The fact that they were so distracted by Newman’s expression that their reflexes vanished for a hot minute, says something. Something Roach doesn’t want to acknowledge right now, so they don’t. Instead, they let their body go limp in Newman’s arms, let them squeeze and squash until they seem to come out of their trance.

“R-Roach?”

“Yes?” they ask in return.

“Are you… ok?”

Roach wriggles to put some distance between Newman and them—as much as their companion’s steel grip allows, anyway—and runs a hand over Newman’s face, wiping off the sweat. “Just a couple broken ribs,” they say, “I’ll live. What about you? What had you panicking like this?”

Newman retracts from those words like a shy snail. It really takes Roach by surprise. They can’t think of many things that might scare Newman, which at least makes the list of suspects quite short.

“Hey,” they whisper in a way that they hope sounds both unaffected and reassuring, “I would know, remember? There’s only you and me here, no third roommate. You can relax.”

Their words, true as they are, do very little to calm Newman down, so Roach sighs and nuzzles against their jaw. “Squeeze away then,” they mutter and kiss Newman’s skin. “I’ll be the prettiest stress ball you’ll ever have.”

---

It isn’t a gentle awakening. Horizon’s muddled thoughts crash into one another as the Domini unsuccessfully tries to slip away from the tight embrace they are being subjected to. What’s going on? their mind asks, half asleep, half panicking.

Memories from last night come back to them as if slogging through a swamp; they remember having dinner with Newman, chatting and somehow ending up in bed together. They remember the tenderness of the moment, the way they felt like they could melt as Newman and they cuddled together...

Horizon strains their neck trying to look over their shoulder, but even with the rays of moonlight seeping through the window, the only thing they have an eyeful of it’s their own dark curls. Newman’s chest is pressed against Horizon’s back and now that the Domini is fully awake, they can feel the other’s racing heartbeat. It scares Horizon, it makes them want to ask what’s going on, what happened to Newman, what, what, what…

They fight those urges. They take a deep breath, find one of Newman’s hands and softly cover it with theirs. “You are in my cabin,” they whisper, “you are in ranch 48, in Luna Ridge. We had diner and I asked you to spend the night. Remember that?”

There’s a long pause, then Horizon feels them nodding against their back. A couple seconds later the iron grip eases up. It gives the Domini a chance to turn around, and very gently press their forehead against Newman’s damp one. “Deep breaths,” they whisper and then are doing just that, hoping Newman will follow their example. An instant later, they are.

Feeling Newman’s muscles relax as they get their breathing under control brings a smile to the Domini’s face.

#ask #tp fiama #tp jonny #tp roach #tp horizon

[girl-with-cat-eyes]

Divorce? Is that a kind of Cheese?

Summary: Sea monsters mate for life. They're not like people, they don't separate or get divorces. Mates are permanent. Except when they're not.

Or: Giulia and Alberto are both children of divorce. Luca is confused.

A/N: Here it is! The long-awaited Luca fic! I hope you all like it! Special thanks to @psadler1 for beta reading this! And now without further ado.

Luca bounced in his seat as the train carried him home from Genoa. He couldn’t wait to see his family and tell them all about what he’d learned while he was away. He couldn’t wait to see Alberto again. He smiled at the thought of seeing his friend.

Giulia smiled from where she sat next to him, “You’re really excited to get home, huh?”, He nodded shyly, “So am I. I love my mom but I miss my dad while I’m away.” Luca sat back down from where he’d been staring out the window. A question formed in the back of his mind, one that he’d wondered since he’d left Portorosso and met Angelina. He’d never dared to voice it until now, “Why don’t you’re parents live together?”

She looked away and, for a split second, Luca thought he saw her tearing up. He wanted to take back the question but, before he could, Giulia blinked away her tears and schooled her expression, “They used to. When I was really little we all lived in Portorosso together. But they fought a lot. And eventually, they sat me down and told me they were getting a divorce and I’d go to Genoa with Mama for school.”

Divorce? Luca wondered what that could be. It sounded like some kind of fancy cheese. Like the ones, Angelina would buy to make sandwiches with. Judging by her tone, however, Luca didn’t think it was like brie or mozzarella. He decided to test his luck once more, “What’s a divorce?” “It’s when two people who are married decide they don’t want to be married anymore. You probably have a different word for it.”

Again Luca was puzzled, “You can stop being married?”, he asked. From everything he’d heard up to this point, marriage seemed pretty permanent.

“Yeah. Don’t you have anything like that?” He shook his head, “No. Sea monsters mate for life.”, He’d known this since birth. Upon turning 16 they would declare mates and spend the next two years courting before sealing their relationship. And that was that. They spent their lives together. Your lifemate was your everything.

“What if they stop loving each other??”, He rubbed the back of his neck at the question, trying to think of an answer. In truth, Luca didn’t know what would happen then. The thought of not loving your lifemate enough to leave them was unthinkable. You just didn’t do that. It was permanent.

Then again, from what he’d been told, marriage was supposed to be permanent too. That didn’t stop Giulia’s parents from divorcing, “I don’t know. But I can ask my parents and tell you what they say?”

Giulia sighed, “It’s ok. You don’t have to.”, Luca nodded, but was secretly determined to find out.

The question didn’t come up right away, he was busy catching his parents and Alberto up on how his school year went. The reunion had been full of hugs, kisses, and tears. His mother and Massimo had worked together to make a feast of both human and seafood for the pair, with Alberto even chipping in to make some desserts. It was a fantastic night of dancing, singing, and eating. And at the end of it all, Daniela and Lorenzo agreed to let him spend the night with Alberto.

The taller sea monster had been all too eager to show him the changes made to his island. He wasn’t fully ready to stay with Massimo all of the time, so Massimo agreed to let him go back and forth between the two places. Of course, that didn’t mean that he wasn’t going to make sure that Alberto was safe and protected. So the pair had spent the fall working to make it more secure from the elements. Luca was impressed upon seeing the changes that had occurred while he was away. They’d spent the night catching up and playing games together. Luca had had a blast. So much so that the question of divorce was forgotten completely.

He didn’t think about divorce again until two weeks later. He was eating dinner with his family, listening to his mother catch him up on everything that had changed while he was away. It was just them tonight; most nights they ate with Giulia, Massimo, and Alberto, but they had a family dinner at least once a week.

Daniella was prepping dinner, sharing all the family news he missed while away at school, “And did I tell you that your cousin Camilla picked Donnie Branzino to be her lifemate? I love her I do, but Donnie Branzino? Out of everyone she could have picked, she picks Bianca Branzino’s boy? Now we have to deal with them at every family gathering from here on out.” Luca stilled in his seat at the mention of lifemates, the conversation he’d had with Giulia returning full force, “Mama?”, he asked, trying to be discreet.

Daniella turned and sat his plate in front of him, “No you cannot go have dinner with your friends. I worked all day making your favorites.”

Luca shook his head, “It’s not that. I have a question about lifemates.” She raised an eyebrow at him, “Lifemates? You have two years before you have to worry about lifemates. What do you want to know?”

He swallowed, gathering all of his confidence before speaking, “What happens if they don’t want to be lifemates anymore?”

“What do you mean?” He shrugged and tried to act casual, “Like if they stopped loving each other. Could they stop being lifemates?” “Sweetheart.”, she placed a hand on his shoulder, “You know we mate for life. Sea monsters don’t fall out of love or stop being mates. Did you hear something?”, Luca sighed and lowered his gaze to the food in front of him.

“Giulia told me about this human thing called divorced. It’s when two human mates stop loving each other and then stop being mates.” Daniella sighed, “That’s awful. But I can’t think of anything happening like around here. Have you Lorenzo?”, for once the other sea monster was paying attention and shook his head.

“Not that I’m aware of.”, Luca nodded in response. He supposed it really was as simple as he first thought. That was until his grandmother spoke up.

“I remember a pair of lifemates who split up.”, Luca looked over at her, hoping she’d elaborate.

“Go on?”, he encouraged with a smile.

“You were only a baby when it happened. Only 3 or 4. There was a couple who lived on the outskirts of town. They had a son around your age. My friend used to babysit for the wife, I can’t remember her name. Lucia? No, Liliana? It doesn’t matter. They argued all the time. Eventually, they split and went to two different pods. He took their son. And then they were both gone.” Luca swallowed at her story. “Oh.”, were the only words he could find himself able to say. The rest of the meal was silent.

“And sometimes human mates just leave each other?”, Alberto asked. They were gathering stones along the beach while they waited for Giulia to finish her deliveries. Luca had told him what she’d said in the meantime.

“Yeah. And I asked my family what happens if lifemates fall out of love and my grandma told me about this couple she used to know that just left. They went to two different pods like they were never together. I always thought lifemates were forever. It’s crazy, right?”

He over at Alberto, expecting him to agree. Instead, he was staring at the ground, a dark look on his face, “Berto?”

“My parents split.”, It came out as a whisper, almost too quiet to hear. Luca’s jaw dropped. He knew that Alberto’s dad had left him, the thought of a parent leaving him filled Luca with white-hot anger. But he’d never said anything about his mother. Luca had assumed that she’d died.

“Oh?”, Alberto sat down and Luca sat beside him, “What happened?” “They fought all the time. And then one night I heard my mama say she couldn’t deal with my papa anymore. And then she left. Only she didn’t take me with her. She...She forgot me. I don’t know why but she did. My father said she didn’t want me. That she didn’t want either of us.”, Tears slowly but surely began to drip down his face, Luca was regretting ever bringing it up.

He wrapped an arm around Alberto, pulling the other boy close, “I’m sorry she left you. She shouldn’t have done that.”, Alberto shook his head fiercely at his words.

“It’s my fault. She left because I’m such a bad kid.” “You’re not bad. You’re amazing. And anyone who says otherwise is a liar.”, Luca hugged the other boy tightly.

“My dad always said so.” “And he’s as much of a liar as Bruno then.”, the resolution in Luca’s voice was as clear as the sky on a sunny day, “You are amazing. And my best friend.” Alberto snorted, “Thanks.”, he whipped his eyes and sat up, “Sorry about crying on you.” “It’s fine.”, Luca rubbed his shoulders, “I’m sorry your parents put you through that.”, They sat like that for some time before Alberto spoke up.

“I wish I didn’t have to pick a lifemate.” Luca looked at him, “Why?”

“Because what if I end up like my parents? I have to trust that they understand me like you do.” Luca looked at Alberto in understanding, “I get how you feel. What if my lifemate doesn’t like me going to the surface? Or what if they don’t like me hanging out with you?”

Alberto sat up straighter, “Lifemates are stupid. Who needs them? We have each other.”, Luca nodded in agreement. Surely a lifemate couldn’t be as cool as being with his best friend, “It can be you, me, and Giulia exploring the world. No lifemates needed.”, The pair sat like that for only a moment longer before getting up and swimming back to town. One thing was clear for both of them; all they needed was each other.

A/N: As always, leave a comment if you liked it.

#luca #pixar luca #luca paguro #alberto scorfano #giulia marcovaldo

[sad-sweet-cowboah]

My Little Secret part 13

Summary: After a rather tumultuous night in Saint Denis, you’re left confused and with more questions than answers. That however doesn’t stop you and Arthur from enjoying one another.

Warnings: Obligatory smutty chapter.

Word Count: 6,673

A/N: Been working on this one for a while. Since I haven’t written in a few months I’ve gotten a tad rusty and needed to take my time with this. So here it is!

“How’d it go?”

Arthur’s quiet, raspy voice immediately snapped you back to reality, blinking as the thunderous clang of the door swung shut behind the two of you. Greeted with the faint vibrations of club music radiating through the floor, you turned to look at him.

He met your gaze with an even stare. “They didn’t scare ya, did they?”

“No, not at all,” you said as you shook your head. “They asked me about my home life, what I did for a living… they seemed real interested when I told them what I was going to school for.”

Curiosity crossed his face. “They mention why?”

“No…” you said, trying to rack your brain. The whole ordeal felt fuzzy, almost dream-like. “Honestly… I can’t remember much.”

Arthur stopped in his tracks. You’d taken one step further before realizing, and you turned to face him. “Arthur?”

“They glamored you,” he stated darkly. “Means they said somethin’ they don’t want ya to remember.”

Your heart sank at this. “So…does that mean I failed?” you quietly asked.

“No, no,” he assured you. “If ya did, they wouldn’t have let ya back out this way. Hell, they wouldn’t let me see ya. They’d take precautions to make sure you wouldn’t know ‘bout us ever again.”

Well, that provided you at least some relief. This however only raised more questions. You remembered their faces, or their vague shapes. Names sounded muddled as if attempting to speak through water. Some memories came clear, you conversing them about yourself. Your job. Your schooling. What your hobbies were. Moments after, darkness.

“Has… has this ever happened? Partial glamors?” you asked.

Arthur sighed before answering, “Very rarely. Hell, I ain’t heard o’ this in a while,” He murmured, his head ducking slightly as his blue eyes swept across the floor ahead.

“So… what does that mean for me?” you continued, frowning at him.

Arthur’s eyes shot back to you, the furrow in his brow easing when he noticed your concern. He placed his hand on your shoulder, sliding it across your arm to gently tug you closer. “Nothin’ bad, sweetheart. Like I said, you wouldn’t be here if things went sour,” he glanced behind him at the closed door. “I’ll have a word with ‘em ‘bout it, see if I can’t figure out why. For now…” he turned to face the hallway again, starting forward. “Lemme take ya home.”

You nodded silently in agreement, somewhat comforted by his words but still apprehensive about what this could all mean. What exactly happened back there that they didn’t want you to remember?

As Arthur led you down the remainder of the hall, the distinct click of the door opening caught your attention. Turning your head to glance behind you, the familiar sight of Charles appeared from behind the door. He hurried forward, moving quite silently despite his thick frame.

“Arthur, hang on!” He called out, reaching the two of you before you could even blink. Vampire swiftness was still something you’d have to get used to.

“Charles?” Arthur turned to face his former companion. “Need somethin’?”

“No,” Charles responded, his eyes briefly flicking to you. “But they do. They told me they need you to go out tonight.”

“Ain’t happenin’,” Arthur answered almost immediately. “I need to take her home.”

“I know, I told them that,” Charles sighed. “Even offered myself in your place, but they were adamant about having you on this case. Sorry, Arthur. I tried.”

You turned your attention to Arthur, the annoyance plain in his weathered face. His blue gaze swept over you, his lips parting as if to say something, but words seemed to fail him.

Charles cleared his throat. “If I may, Lucia has prepared some accommodations at the hotel tonight,” he explained. “If you’re okay with it, Arthur, I could take Y/N there.”

Hotel accommodations? This night was becoming even weirder. You didn’t really want to leave Arthur and yearned nothing more than to crawl into the comfort of your own bed, especially after learning what happened to you just moments earlier. Your head was spinning, unless that was a byproduct of being glamored. Those fuzzy images danced in your mind’s eye as you tried to grasp on any sort of information.

Arthur’s heavy sigh caught your attention. He shook his head slightly before looking at you once again. “Sorry, sweetheart. As much as I wanna get outta this, I can’t.”

You just simply nodded in response. The idea of staying in a hotel wasn’t a nerve-wracking thought, especially in the middle of Saint Denis. It wouldn’t be fair to ask Charles to drive you over an hour back home. At least they were thoughtful enough to allow you for a place to stay instead of having to call for a ride. You supposed it could be worse; dumped on the side of the road out here.

“You got work, or anything to do tomorrow?”

“Not that I’m aware of,” you answered truthfully. “If you need to go, then go.”

Arthur’s eyes searched yours for a moment, as if trying to seek a different, nonverbal response. Finally, he spoke, “Alright, jus’ know you won’t be back home ‘til nighttime, unless ya call a taxi.”

“I’m fine with that,” you affirmed. “Wouldn’t want you burning up on your motorcycle in the morning.”

His lip tugged into a faint half-smile. He reached up and placed his hand against your cheek, sliding his thumb briefly over the swell of the bone. “I’ll be joinin’ ya before dawn, though I expect you’ll be asleep by then,” he muttered as he leaned in to place a quick kiss on your lips.

Matching his smile with your own, you gave him another nod. He turned to face Charles, murmuring a thanks before stalking back down the hall. He yanked open the door and disappeared behind it as it swung closed with almost excessive force. With the slam echoing loudly against the bare walls, you sighed and looked at Charles.

Charles smiled once you met gazes, an apologetic look written on his face. “Sorry for the sudden change of plans,” he said.

“It’s not your fault,” you sighed. “So, uh… what hotel accommodations were made so last minute?”

“A vampire-owned hotel,” Charles answered. He held up one hand to gesture to the exit while he placed a hand on your shoulder. He noticed the bewilderment on your face. “It’s not what you think, I promise.”

---

It certainly wasn’t what you were thinking at all.

With the image close to an old, haunted mansion surrounded by decay painted in your mind, Charles led you back out through the nightclub and back into the thick night air where a fancy black car waited for you. He drove through the liveliest part of the city, stopping at what you’d known to be only the most expensive hotel in the state of Lemoyne. A single night for their cheapest room ran into the thousands.

And it was owned and ran by the vampires.

With it being so late, you expected low activity. Your mindset changed when Charles brought you into a bustling lobby. With so many moving around, you weren’t sure who was human and who was vampire.

Seamlessly weaving through the crowd, Charles brought you to the front desk. Within moments you were checked in, and the receptionist flashed you a brilliant smile with her fangs gleaming beneath the golden light. You probably would never get used to that.

Afterward, Charles swept you toward the elevator. Traveling up a few floors you found it was much quieter than the lobby, only one or two people milling around, giving you a swift glance before disappearing into their rooms. At this point you couldn’t tell who was human or vampire.

Charles led you to your designated room. He stopped just before the door and turned, offering you a small smile. “This is where we part ways, will you be okay from here?” He asked.

You nodded in response, sliding the key card from its holder. “I’ve stayed in hotels before, it’s no different.”

“I know, I just want to make sure you’re comfortable being here,” he replied. “You are surrounded by vampires after all.”

“As long as they don’t break into my room and drain me overnight,” you were only half joking, but you couldn’t help but to wonder…

Charles chuckled, his face folding into an expression of faint amusement. “It won’t go that far, there are more civilized vampires here than you think.”

“And I know Arthur would protect me in the event they weren’t,” you affirmed, mostly for yourself. “Whenever he comes back…”

“Sooner than you think,” Charles assured you, placing his hand on your shoulder. “Trust me, he does quick work. He’ll be back before you know it.”

Of course Charles would understand, given his past with Arthur. You suddenly felt compelled to ask more questions about their relationship, but how would you even approach that? Aside from the obvious, there was a glaring difference between you and Charles.

Before you could even begin to think of anything to say or ask, Charles stepped back from you. “I’ll be stepping out, hope you enjoy your night.”

“Thank you, Charles,” you say. “Thank you for going out of your way to bring me here.”

“You’re welcome, it’s not an issue at all,” he responded. “Arthur feels deeply for you, and I can see why. I’m glad he’s found happiness with you.”

That warmed your heart to hear.

“I’ll be heading out now…” he spoke. You expected him to turn and walk away. He however leaned in closer, dropping his voice. “By the way… he loves baths.”

You blinked in confusion, giving him an inquiring look. “Huh?”

Charles gave another small smile, the corner of his lip twitching into the slightest of smirks. “Something left over from our old lives. Back then, hotels employed women as bath ladies to help wash anyone who requested it. It’s one habit he didn’t let go of.”

Your confusion only heightened. Was he insinuating that you wash Arthur down? As seconds ticked by, the realization dawned upon you. A flash of heat invaded your face and you ducked your head to avert your gaze. “Uh, thanks for that information…?”

Charles softly chuckled in response, before murmuring a quiet goodbye. As his figure left your peripheral vision, you turned to face the door of your room once again.

The inside was more modernized than you expected it to be. Used to the classic architecture of Saint Denis, this was a stark difference. It reminded you of a type of penthouse seen only in media. A monochromatic scheme of black and silver decorated every facet of furniture and décor. Massive windows sat on the opposite side, only partly covered by the blackout curtains. A king-sized bed with a wine-colored comforter sat in the middle, and upon it seemed to be a pile of neatly folded fabric.

Curious, you approached the bed and found that it was a pair of silk pajamas with the hotel’s emblem embroidered on the left breast. A few chocolates were placed intricately on top of it. Underneath sat a soft robe.

Damn, did every guest get this sort of treatment?

After familiarizing yourself with everything, you showered and wrapped yourself in the robe. You then turned the TV on and relaxed on the bed, too comfortable in the robe to change into the pajamas.

Mindlessly flipping through the channels, you couldn’t settle on one. As much as you tried to focus, your thoughts were just too wired. This whole night set you in a tizzy and you weren’t exactly sure how to make head or tail of it. Arthur said you were partially glamored, and for reasons unknown. He assured you it wasn’t a bad thing, but there was still the question as to why. Did you say something, or did they? What vital information was shared that you had to be wiped clean of?

You also had to wonder what job was so important they needed Arthur to do that very night. He did say he was sort of like a bounty hunter, which meant dangerous work. You’d seen him in action, and knowing his former life as an outlaw meant he was probably one of the toughest guys around. You still couldn’t help but to worry however.

How likely was it he could get seriously injured?

With a silent scold to yourself, you shook her head in attempt to shake that thought. He’s been alive long before your grandparents were even a thought. This was his job, and he spoke as if it was just a normal 9-5 to him.

Time blurred together as your brain continue to flip-flop between everything that happened tonight. The TV was mere background noise as you tried and failed to focus on what was airing. You were watching a movie at some point, when focusing back in there was now a documentary. The movie apparently ended an hour ago and it was now 3 am.

Jesus, I need to go to bed. You thought to yourself as you shifted to finally change into the provided nightwear. Though you still felt wide awake, attempting to sleep was better than getting lost in incoherent thoughts in a seemingly never ending cycle.

Just as you slid to your feet and began to untie the robe, the click of the lock sounded. You froze instantly, your eyes snapping to the door as it opened to reveal Arthur.

The tension eased from your body as he stepped in quietly, his eyes quickly scanning your body before meeting your eyes. “Sweetheart, thought you’d be asleep by now.”

“I was about to try,” you answered, abandoning the knot. “I don’t really feel tired.”

Arthur stepped in further and the door closer behind him. “It’s been a long night for ya, I expected different,” he chuckled slightly.

“Yeah, but I keep thinking back to what happened. It’s such a weird night, my brain doesn’t want to simmer down,” you sighed and plopped your butt on the edge of the bed. As Arthur came closer, the fabric of his jacket flitted from his torso. It was just a few inches of movement, but enough to reveal blood stain on his shirt. Your eyes widened. “Arthur?!”

“It ain’t mine, don’t worry,” he said quickly with a surprisingly casual tone. “Jus’ a messy job.”

“What did you do? Kill more fledglings?” You asked curiously.

“More or less,” he shrugged the jacket off, letting it fall to a heap on the floor. Crimson splatter painted his bare forearms. “Ain’t ever gonna be a clean job, as much as I try.”

“And… you walked all the way up here like that,” you stated, gesturing to him.

“There are less used entrances, and humans would be asleep now,” he explained, giving you a slightly cheeky smirk. “Most of ‘em anyway.”

“Well, maybe I can rest easy now that you’re back,” you pointed out with a small smile of your own. “But I was worried about you too.”

His face softened at your words. He stepped toward you, reaching out with a cleaner hand to caress your chin. “You don’t gotta worry, I always return.”

Leaning lightly into his cool palm, you said, “Don’t jinx yourself.”

Arthur gave a small chuckle. “I ain’t as vulnerable as you think, sweetheart. I promise you that.”

You hummed softly, grazing your fingers against the back of his hand. “I hope so.”

His smile was warm and comforting, a moment of silent intimacy exchanged between the two of you. Placing a gentle kiss on your forehead, he backed off and crossed the room over to where the bathroom door stood ajar. “Gonna shower, I’ll be out in a bit.”

You nodded, silently watching him disappear behind the door. Within half a minute, the telltale sound of water pattering against porcelain filled the quiet space. You were a little more awake now that Arthur came back, regardless you were going to return to your abandoned attempt to rest.

Standing back up, you began to fumble with the knot on the robe once again.

Charles’ voice suddenly passed through your head. Arthur loves baths.

You paused once again. A quick, single thought loomed. You glanced at the closed bathroom door. However, this wasn’t the 1800’s. Indoor plumbing has greatly improved since then. It would probably be redundant.

But what harm was there in trying?

You and Arthur hadn’t done anything yet. Aside from a few makeout sessions and the occasional brush against more sensitive areas (mostly accidental), seeing each other naked was still something to check off on this list. Neither of you pushed for anything, especially since you weren’t sure how to proceed with a vampire.

Perhaps it was time to find out.

Padding across the room, you rested your hand on the knob and turned it, half surprised to find it gave way. Taking a deep breath you pushed it open, met with a growing wall of humidity. His silhouette formed a soft outline through the shower curtain. He twitched from behind the curtain.

He spoke out your name softly, a touch of concern ringing his voice. As quiet as you were, he had impressively acute hearing. “Are you alright? Need somethin’?” He asked.

“No, I…” you trailed off. Almost hesitant to try, you took a deep breath and added, “I just wanted to join you, if that’s okay.”

A couple of seconds ticked by, the water the only sound. You wondered if he was going to refuse.

But to your surprise, he didn’t. “Sure,” he finally answered. “Come on in.”

You smiled to yourself. You’d loosened the robe enough to allow the soft billowing fabric to fall from your figure. Shrugging it off the rest of the way, the only thing separating you and him was the shower curtain. Stepping forward, you reached out and tugged it aside.

Arthur’s face entered your field of view first. Then, his broad torso. Soon all of him was revealed to you, his wet skin glistening beneath the bright light. Rivulets of water cascaded down his body, faintly tinged red from the blood that still remained.

God, was he built like an ox. Your eyes slowly scanned him up and down, stealing an extra second to gaze at the appendage sitting at the base of his waist. You met his gaze just seconds after, hoping he didn’t catch you staring inappropriately.

He smiled and stuck his hand out to you, beckoning you in with a slight curl of his fingers. You slid in without an issue, dampened by stray drops. Your heart was beginning to pound. It wasn’t the first time you’d been nude in someone else’s presence, however knowing he was more than human still struck a sliver of anxiety into you.

His blue eyes shifted for the briefest of a second, taking in your full figure but like you, not letting his curious gaze linger for too long. “You’re gorgeous,”

Heat crept into your face. “You are too,” you bashfully replied, your arms naturally loosely curling around yourself.

“Out of the two o’ us, I think you take the cake on looks, darlin’,” he spoke softly, a half-smile playing on his lips.

“Oh Arthur, I can’t take all of the credit…” you murmured to him. You wanted to touch him but a small part of your brain still was hesitant. Your one hand reached forward, opting to take his hand. “I still think you’re one of the most handsome men I’ve ever met.”

He hummed quietly in response, squeezing your hand in his. “Guess you’ll need to keep remindin’ me.”

“And I have no problem with that,” you stepped somewhat closer, allowing your words to feign bravery. In reality your heart began to pound, and you knew Arthur would be able to hear it. He however gave no indication of knowing, not even a simple acknowledgement. What was wrong with you? It wasn’t like this sort of intimacy was new.  “I, uh, heard you like baths.”

Arthur released a small a chuckle. “I’m guessin’ you and Charles had a conversation.”

“You could say that,” you shyly spoke. “Would you mind if I…?”

“You don’t gotta do anything,” he assured you, his brow furrowing slightly. “Don’t want you feelin’ forced.”

“I want to,” you affirmed. “And I don’t feel like I’m being forced, Arthur…” you reached down to grab a bar of soap. “As long as you want it, I’m happy to provide.”

The wrinkles of concern softened, the smile returning to Arthur’s face. “I guess I can’t say no then.”

You matched his smile, beginning with rubbing the soap between your hands. With mittens of suds, you reached up and slid them against his shoulders. Slowly you worked down his arms, refraining from squeezing his biceps. They were thick and solid, even at resting position. As many times he held you in his arms, you never really thought twice about them. How strong was he really?

Your hands brushed against his, receiving no reaction as you lathered more suds against his work-worn palms. You realized for the first time how warm was skin was. Obviously a product of hot water, however it stirred up a feeling of nostalgia of having a warm body to cuddle with.

Not that you minded his lack of a temperature on a humid night anyway.

Once he rinsed his arms, you moved to his torso. An expanse of more muscle, formed pecs and the tease of an ab outline. While his body wasn’t akin to a typical model, he was certainly built from whatever hard work he was subjected to in his previous life. He once explained vampirism kept you in stasis of how you were as a living being, as well as negating any physical ailments you might have had at the time. You had to wonder what toll his once terminal illness held on his mortal body.

With your brain detached from your mind, you were brought back to reality when you realized you’d ran your hands along his chest and torso more times than necessary. Quickly you shifted your attention. If Arthur noticed, he certainly didn’t seem to have an issue with it.

You were careful below his navel, an obvious place sitting in the corner of your eye as your fingers danced around his waistline. You focused on a bit of blood still against his hip. Even as you tried to avoid the tiny thought that was slowly growing in the back of your mind, you couldn’t help but to wonder…

Once again you’d spent a little too long in one spot. Snapping your attention down, you instead brought your focus to his legs.

“Haven’t enjoyed this in ages…” you heard Arthur quietly say.

Peering up at him, you noted the content look on his face. “Charles did tell me there were women who were paid to do this,” you stated.

“Long time ago,” he responded with a tone of reminiscence. “Only time I could truly relax outside o’ gang duties.”

“I guess the introduction of indoor plumbing and showers probably did away with them,” you joked lightly, your fingertips running along the groove of his thigh muscles.

“Unfortunately,” he chuckled. “Thank you for this, darlin’.”

Flashing him a smile, you replied, “you’re welcome,” before moving down to his calves. Making quick work of them, you rinsed off the suds before standing back up. “Turn around,” you instructed.

Arthur did just that, exposing his back. As your eyes swept over him, you couldn’t help but to think everything about this man was built perfectly. The soap bar ran smoothly across the plains of muscle, every ridge and every dip. It was tempting to climb this man like the tree he was.

Those lingering thoughts seemed to stir something within you, a minuscule spark burning deep in your gut. You shook your head, silently scolding yourself. No need to become all hot and bothered over this. Though since he was facing away, you glanced down to take a peek. He had a decently nice butt, toned and not completely muscular, yet not flat.

How fun would it be to grab it while he…

Nope.

You stopped that mental train in its tracks. What was wrong with you tonight?

You rinsed off the soap for him this time, allowing yourself one final quick gaze before he turned to face you again. The smile he had on his lips never lifted as he reached up to caress your cheek. “That was real nice,” he complimented. “I could, uh, wash ya next, if you’d like.”

“I showered earlier,” you responded, reaching up to hold his hand with yours. “But maybe next time.”

A low hum rumbled from his chest in response. “Next time,” he agreed. His thumb smoothed lightly across your cheek, trapping your face in with his other hand. Leaning down, he placed a tender kiss on your lips. You’d expected it to be quick, except he held you there, slowly drawing you in until your skin just barely brushed against his abdomen.

Your fingers flexed at your sides, itching to bring yourself even closer. Prior nerves have since been quelled, yet a different storm began to roll in. The urge was growing more prominent, though you still had to wonder if it were even possible for him.

Finally Arthur released you, slowly retreating to stand upright. The nearly nonexistent space between the two opened slightly as his hands slid down to hold you gently at your waist. He stared at you unblinkingly, blue-green orbs reflecting darkly through the partly obscured light. His gaze was soft, loving, it was almost too overwhelming. Your eyes averted from his, heat once again making its home on your face as a shy smile formed.

Though unintentional, your gaze seemed to drift toward there again. A brief glance lengthened when you realized his appearance changed. Now, he stood more prominent, somewhat elongated in a half-hardened manner.

Oh.

He stepped back immediately as if he realized where your attention settled. “Sorry,” he mumbled. “Don’t mean to seem like a pervert.”

You peered back up to his face, noting the apologetic embarrassment written clear across it. It wasn’t even apparent to you that vampires could feel embarrassment, let alone sexual thoughts.

Then again, he did once explain how he still had human emotions. He’d proven that a hundred times over.

“You’re not,” you start. “I didn’t even know vampires could even…” trailing off, your eyes once again sinking below before looking back to him.

“We can,” he confirmed. “Jus’ been a while, guess I let my thoughts wander too much.”

Somehow learning this information was a relief, though it wasn’t for a selfish reason. You took a step toward him. “It’s been a while for me too,” you reached out to entwine your fingers with his. “It’s okay, I don’t mind.”

Arthur’s hands squeezed gently around yours. The smile from before slowly made another appearance, though holding a bashful nature. “You’re too good to an old bastard like me,” he murmured to you.

You giggled at his words. “I think it’s well deserved…” you shuffled even closer, rolling onto your toes to kiss him again. A wall of solid muscle brushed against your soft exterior, drawing you in for more contact. In a moment of confidence, you broke through the last strings of hesitation and pressed yourself to his body. His hands immediately released yours, finding their place once again on your waist. Absent was the tender grasp from earlier, his hands seemed to have a firmer grip on you.

That wasn’t the only part of him that seemed to firm up.

Somehow, you were feeling adventurous.

Placing your palm against his hip, you wanted to test the waters. Your fingers traced a nonlinear pattern against his skin, drawing closer to the front of his body. You half-expected a reaction only to find none, at least for now.

The heart of your palm smoothed against the plain of his lower abdominal muscles, soft to the touch yet still solid, he showed no signs of tension. Curls of hair intruded your fingertips. Lower you sunk until you found what you were searching for.

You waited for a flinch, for him to pull back. He provided nothing of the sort.

With one smooth glide from hilt to tip, it only then occurred to you how robust he was. A certain thickness that your fingers could not fully reach around. Your own thoughts further progressed to a deeper, more carnal desire. The singular thought of taking him all at once stirred even more excitement deep in your core.

Pulling back from the lip-locked embrace, you smiled sweetly at him, pumping your hand slowly to milk that slack-jawed, half-lidded expression. He only stood there, thoroughly enjoying your touch. Thumbs smoothed against your skin only further encouraged you.

How would he taste?

You knelt down, giving him a thorough once over, drinking in every inch of him before arriving to his face. Drawing up a sensual gaze to offer him, you asked in a sultry tone, “May I?”

Arthur gave you one small nod. That was all you needed.

Darting you tongue from between your lips, you toyed with the pinch of skin underneath. It earned a shudder as you circled your tongue around the head, your eyes never leaving his face. Inching further, you engulfed him slowly, pleasantly underestimating how much space he occupied. He could easily reach the back of your throat.

You began to bob at an eased pace, allowing your tongue to do most of the work. The small sigh gracing your ears encouraged you further, faster.

Fingers smoothed against your scalp in small circles. His deep voice growled your name. He tangled himself within your locks, holding you there yet not forcing you to make him deeper. You appreciated that, rewarding him with haste.

Without a pause, you reached up to fondle him, offering a gentle massage. He seemed to enjoy that, hips twitching forward with restraint. It amazed you how careful he was.

His rough voice filled the shower, a mixture of swears and your name echoing against the confined walls. You pushed even further to take all of him, as difficult as that was, yet the way he gasped indicated his appreciation. The hand on your head curled into a fist, loosely holding your hair.

You did it again, gauging for further reaction. He groaned much louder, expelling a raspy “fuck,” before peering down at you with a subtle, yet pleading gaze.

Arthur was clear with what he was asking, and you hummed to him in approval. His smile widened, placing his hands on either side of your head before thrusting. He began with cautious and slow movement, able to fill your entire mouth with such small effort. You held still for him, allowing for him to use you in such a dirty manner. Soon his pace increased, burying himself even more with each passing second.

He praised you, smoothed your hair, tangling his fingers within it once again. He muttered sweet sins that would make a preacher blush. His grip on you tightened, and he whispered to you, “I’m close,”

Your eyes swiveled up to meet his, rubbing your hand against his thigh as approval. A hazy smile crossed his lips, taking your permission to give one deep thrust. With one sweeping movement he brushed against the back of your throat. You fought back a gag, keeping yourself still for him.

Yet he was fairly quick, pushing himself deep only a few more times before releasing a guttural moan, hips stuttering to a complete stop. It almost surprised you when a cool liquid spilled onto your tongue. When he stepped back and freed your mouth, you savored the taste and swallowed.

Arthur’s satisfied sigh caught your attention. “Ain’t had that in a while,” he mumbled, reaching down to caress your chin. Blue eyes glossed over with a lazy, star struck look. “Thank you.”

You stood up and smiled at him. “Only doing what a good girlfriend should do,” you said with a slight giggle.

Arthur chuckled lowly at your response. The tip of his thumb ran across your lips gently as the smile on his face turned thoughtful. “‘Spose I oughta return the favor,” he spoke, reaching behind him to turn off the water.

A flash of heat crossed your cheeks at the mere thought. Before you could say anything, his arms wrapped around you. With ease he lifted you from the tub, earning a squeak of surprise from you as he stepped out. A sudden shift from humidity to air conditioning was an indication of where he carried you. The chill on your wet skin was soon forgotten when he laid you on the plush comforter of the bed. Arthur’s grip on you soon lightened, wandering hands appreciating every dip and curve of you.

Lips caressed your neck, your collarbone, your chest. A trail of goosebumps followed, awakening senses burning within you. Each new touch drew in your craving for him even more. A soft moan slipped out and he hadn’t even properly touched you yet.

His presence hovered over your center, thick arms sliding beneath your legs to securely hook them. You peered down, watching as he adjusted to kneel between your legs. Eyes flicking up at you, he smiled and quietly asked, “You alright with this?”

You nodded to him. “More than alright.”

His smile widened, heading dipping further, his soft breath ghosting across the sensitive skin. Wetness upon your slit, you twitched in surprise from the chilled sensation in such a sensitive area. The initial shock soon replaced with an all-too familiar tingle that you’d only been dreaming about these past few months.

“Arthur…” you sighed out, closing your eyes and fully immersing yourself within your pleasure. He was much more dexterous than thought; ripples of ecstasy soon overcoming your body. Your legs trembled within his grasp, moaning louder when fingers decidedly explored your inner walls.

His tongue worked in tandem with his touch, an almost overwhelming sensation radiating from your core. If it hadn’t been for his other arm keeping you still, you would have bucked into his face. His name left your lips more times than you could count; a string of sighs and praises following. Your body craved more of his touch, more of him. The mere thought fueled you further.

Your peak was building much quicker than you anticipated. Your hips ground against his mouth selfishly in attempt to chase that high, though in a matter of seconds it vanished.

Giving a pleading whine, you peered down at him with a look of questioning. He smiled apologetically and smoothed his palm across your inner thigh. “Easy, darlin’, it ain’t a race.”

You took a deep breath and nodded, silently scolding yourself for that. The prior thought soon was overtaken, however, as Arthur trailed his fingers across your abdomen. He soon continued his ministrations, allowing for the bubble to build again. Arthur seemed to work even slower now, watching you with intense baby blues. A deep flush settled in your cheeks, turning your gaze away only for him to target a particularly sensitive spot. A toe-curling, squeal inducing rush cascading through your whole body.

“Fuck,” you gasped out. “Arthur, oh g-god…” you stammered, covering your mouth as if others would hear. He eased off, returning to his normal pace before attempting it again. “Arthur!”

His only response was a low hum. One hand trailed upward, the rough of his palm nearly tickling the sensitive skin of your stomach. Soon cupping the mound of your breast, he began to knead the soft flesh. Your eyes flittered closed, a sharp intake of breath when he pinched your nipple. He rolled the hardened pucker between his fingertips, torqueing gently. You hissed out his name once again.

It wasn’t much longer until your peak started to swell again. Fighting the urge to buck your hips into his mouth again, your back arched, hands fisting the comforter beneath, head tilted back, lewd moans sounded to the ceiling above.

Arthur was relentless, drawing out your pleasure with careful expertise. Absent of a quick build, every passing second was almost agonizing. You yearned to chase it, to vainly use his mouth. God damn him for holding you like this. Your high was imminent; your muscles trembling beneath your skin in desperate need to release.

And release you did. One complex drag of his tongue finally brought you over the edge. Every nerve sung as your body contracted, energy expelling in a high-pitched moan. He continuously lapped at you in a lazy manner, drawing out your climax until overstimulation took over, wriggling and trembling beneath him in attempts to pull away.

His arms slid from your legs just a moment later, and he crawled up onto the bed. Propping himself up on one arm, he smiled down at you.

Your returning smile was weak. With your heart racing and breath short, it was almost like you’d run a marathon. “T-thank you,” you managed to squeak. “Haven’t had a…a release like that in a long time.”

Arthur chuckled once. A hand wandered onto your stomach, lightly rubbing small circles against your skin. “Happy you enjoyed it, sweetheart,” he murmured to you.

You lay there, allowing him to trace patterns on your skin. Your heart slowly returned to normal, the last of your high finally dissipating into fatigue. Even as tired as you were, your body craved even more of him…

Your eyes opened to him shifting on the bed. He reached over you to grab something – a flash of pale silk appeared out of the corner of your eye, the provided pajamas.

“Thought those were for me,” you quietly said to him.

“They are,” he responded, placing them next to you. “Put ‘em on, then we can get underneath the covers.”

You gave him a look of confusion. “But I wanna continue…” you moaned to him, rolling over to face him completely. Your hands cupped his face to kiss him.

He didn’t hesitate to return the gesture, though quick and chaste. He pulled back slightly, offering an apologetic smile. “You were startin’ to fall asleep, sweetheart.”

“No I wasn’t,” you started to protest, interrupted by a deep yawn. “Just need a pick-me-up…” you began to sit up, wanting to straddle him. Arthur however placed a hand on your upper arm. An action absent of any sort of force, yet it stopped you in your tracks.

“It’s 4 am, you need to rest,”

“I used to pull all-nighters for school,” you pointed out.

Arthur sighed and shook his head, moving his hand from your arm to cradle your cheek. “That ain’t necessary, love,” he spoke evenly, boring into your eyes with such smoldering intensity. “You’ve had a long night, and I don’t wanna mess up your sleep schedule.”

You contemplated his words. As much as you hated to admit it, he was right. The post-orgasm fatigue was just enough to finally simmer your brain down, and your eyelids were growing heavier. “Alright, I’ll go to sleep…” you resigned with a pout.

He smiled, softly running his thumb across your cheek. “Plenty o’ time for that, I promise.”

You hummed in response, your brain beginning to succumb the creeping fog. You managed to sit up, Arthur helping you into the ever-so comfortable silk set. The fabric felt like heaven against your skin, and soon you were tucked beneath the plush blankets. He settled in beside you. Through the heavy drowsiness, you had to smile to yourself. This was the first time you’d be sharing a bed with him, differing sleep schedules be damned.

His arm draped loosely over your waist, his body fitting against you perfectly. Even with his lack of warmth, you were comfortable enough not to care. His lips brushed against the nape of your neck before he whispered,

“Goodnight.”

#Arthur Morgan #Arthur Morgan x reader #vampire Arthur #vampire AU #Charles Smith #back on my bullshit

[uncpanda]

Blood is Thicker than Water: Part 14

AN: When it comes to the timeline, I say screw it. It’s more fun to re-arrange stuff.  We finally get to meet Lucia! And some more Munoz drama.

Big shout out to those who helped with the Spanish in the chapter! It meant I didn’t have to use google translate. I’m very grateful for their help in the picking out phrases, terms of endearment, and their opinions. You guys rock!

Please Let Me Know What YOU THINK!!!

Master List

You’re unbelievably warm, you’re snuggled in bed with Rafael curled around you. His front is flush against your back, one of his legs is wedged between yours, his arms are wrapped around you, and his nose is buried in the crook of your neck. You feel him place lazy kisses on your neck, and then you feel him bite down just slightly. Your eyes go wide, because you know, you know that’s going to leave a mark. 

You squeal and turn to look back at him, “Rafael Barba what did you just do?” 

He laughs, and points to his own neck, where you had left similar bites the previous night, "La revancha, cariño."

You slap at his chest, and his arms wrap around your middle and pull you into his lap, “You are acting like a hormonal teenage boy Rafael Barba!” 

His laughter increases, “I don’t think I’ve been called a hormonal teenager since I was in eleventh grade.” There’s a lot of barking as Benny comes in from the living room, he likes to curl up on the couch early in the morning. 

He’s quick to jump onto the bed and squirm up next to you and Raf as you collapse on him, “Well that’s what you are.” 

“So, what does that make you?” 

You roll your eyes, “The idiot that is in love with you.” 

His hands cup your cheek and thread into your hair, whispers “Then I am one lucky man.” and kisses you. 

You pull back a moment later, and Benny takes your place, half lying on Rafa’s chest. “We have to get going, and don’t forget we’re celebrating Liv’s promotion tonight.”

Your sister, the sergeant, had passed with flying colors. Her swearing in ceremony wasn’t for a while, but Ed had decided to throw a dinner party . . . with a lot of help from you. You admired his desire to do something special for your sister, but he also knew his limitations. 

“I already cleared my calendar. Plus, anyone who would need me for work, is going to be there.” 

You laugh, and go to change. 

You and Rafael had been living together for a month, and in that time the two of you had gotten into a routine. He was usually up first, and made the coffee. You would roll out of bed thirty minutes later and the two of you would take Benny for a walk. From there he would shower and change while you would make breakfast and pack him a lunch; a salad, sandwich, or leftovers. 

He would head to work, and you’d head into the home office that you had partially taken over. You would work from home, and sometimes you would go into the office. It was all terribly domestic.  

While he goes into the bathroom to brush his teeth, you pull on Rafa’s old Harvard sweatshirt, a present from his Abuelita when he had been accepted. It was your favorite thing to wear because it was soft, and it smelled like him. The two of you had a running gag about who’s sweatshirt it really was. You liked to steal it from each other. 

“Do you want to go pick my Abuelita up together or do you just want to meet at your sister’s?” 

You sit on the bed, and Benny crawls over to you. He knows it’s time for his walk. You scratch his ears. “I will meet you at your office, with Benny, and we can go get Abuelita together.” 

He reappears a moment later and you watch as he pulls on a long sleeved Harvard tee-shirt, and sweatpants, “She was really excited that she was invited. She went on and on about it when we talked on the phone yesterday.” 

You scoff, “Liv loves your grandmother.” To be honest that was an understatement. In the past month Catalina had spent a lot of time with you and Rafa. And each time she visited, a trip to see Noah was pretty much demanded. Catalina had started bringing spanish children's books to read to Noah. As a result, Liv had started to refer to Catalina as Abuelita to Noah, something that delighted Catalina to no end. 

The route you walk Benny is a good mile, and at a leisurely pace it takes you a good twenty-five minutes. You spend most of that time holding Rafa’s hand and talking about your upcoming day or plans for the weekend. Today, you don’t even make it out the door of the building before Rafa stops short. 

You come face to face with a woman you’ve only seen pictures of, around Catalina’s apartment. Rafa’s voice is soft, “Mami.” 

“Six months Rafael Barba. Six months without a phone call.” 

He lets out a deep breath, “You made it pretty clear you didn’t want to hear from me the last time we talked.” 

His mother crosses his arms, “I said I didn’t want to hear it unless there was an apology.” 

He shrugs, “I don’t have one. Alex was . . . you know what it doesn’t matter. We’ve had this fight, and I’m not having it again.” 

“Watch your tone, I’m your mother.” 

"¿Por qué estás aquí, Mami?"

“Your grandmother is skipping the neighborhood festival next week, for the first time ever. She said she had plans, but she wouldn’t say with who. I figured it out, but she wouldn’t say anything else. In fact she hasn’t said a word about you since our fight. What’s going on Rafael? Who’s this?” There’s a wine from Benny and Lucia’s eyes go to the dog, and her brow furrows, “Raf?” 

“There’s a lot to explain, and we don’t have time right now. We have to walk Benny, I’ll meet you for dinner later this week, and answer your questions.” 

“Benny?” 

"Nuestro perro."

"¿Nuestro?"

"Sí, nuestro."

Without another word, he grabs your hand and tugs both you and Benny forward, leaving Lucia behind. You’re a few feet away when you say, “I can always take Benny on my own.” 

He rolls his eyes, “I’ve seen too many cases start that way, and as cute and adorable as Benny is, he’s not exactly intimidating.” 

You look down at your goofy, three legged dog who is sniffing a fire hydrant, and you know it’s true. Benny would likely welcome a robber into your home as long as he got a belly scratch out of it. 

“Plus, I don’t feel like fighting this early.” 

You don’t say anything else. This is his fight and as much as you hate the pain this entire ordeal has caused him, you know you can’t protect him from it. You can, however, be there for him. That day you send him off to work with a special lunch, and a hell of a kiss. 

You spend the day working, and you take a few quick walks with Benny, but you get ready for Liv’s celebration dinner early. The original dress you planned to wear is now useless thanks to the hickey on your neck. The ones you leave on Rafael are always hidden by his collared shirts. 

It’s still winter and Christmas is right around the corner. You have options, but you hate turtlenecks, and scarves indoors kind of scream hickey. You do however, have a high necked red dress. You feel just a tad strangled in it, and you don’t wear it often, but you don’t have a choice tonight. You pair it with some nude ballet flats, and fasten Benny’s red striped tie onto his collar. You know for a fact that Rafael is wearing the human version of it today.

You grab your coat and you head out the door, and then stop immediately when you come face to face with Lucia Barba. 

“Mrs. Barba.” 

She stares at you for a moment, “So you’re not the dog walker.” 

“No ma’am.” 

“You’re living with my son?” 

“Yes.” 

“And you have a dog . . .who’s wearing a tie.” 

You cough, “We have an event tonight.” She stares at you for a moment, waiting for more, and you cave, “My sister just passed the sergeants exam, and my brother-in-law is throwing her a party. Benny and I are going to pick up Rafa, and then Abuelita, and head over.” 

“My mother’s going?” 

“Yes Ma’am, she’s very fond of my sister and nephew, Noah.” 

There’s a moment of silence before she asks, “Is there room for one more?” 

And really, what can you say to that? 

The cab ride to Hogan Place is awkward. To her credit, Lucia doesn’t ask anymore questions, and she earns a few points when she tentatively pats Benny’s head. You do have the forethought to send Rafa a heads up that Lucia is joining the festivities. 

When you arrive, you pay for the cab while Lucia heads on without you. You and Benny have to jog to keep up. She sweeps right past Carmen and into his thankfully empty office, “You start a serious relationship, you adopt a dog, and you don’t tell me.” 

You’re out of breath, by the time you follow her in. Rafa’s eyes flicker to you and you wheeze out, “I sent a text.” 

His lips quirk, “I got it. Why do you think the office is empty?” 

You unclip Benny’s leash so he can go to Rafa, and his mother notices the ties, “You’re matching with the dog?” 

He smiles, “Yes. I bought them for that purpose.” 

She turns to you, you’ve settled on the couch, “He bought them?” 

“They have like five matching sets by now.” 

Lucia is silent as she processes, and turns back to Raf, "Esto es serio."

"Llevamos juntos nueve meses, y uno viviendo juntos, le compré a Benny como regalo de cumpleaños, él también es mío. Y yo la amo a ella."

You have no idea what’s being said, but Lucia’s eyes are wide, “"¿La amas?"

"Si."

“And I’ve missed all of this over a zipper problem?” 

Your back goes ramrod straight, “The words you’re looking for are child pornography.” 

Lucia’s eyes go wide, “What?” 

And it’s at that moment you realize that Lucia doesn’t have a clue about the real reason Rafael turned on Alex. She doesn’t know the real reason why he torpedoed any chance of a political career. Because your sweet, smart, handsome and incredibly dumb boyfriend had been trying to protect not just her, but the whole damn neighborhood. 

The child pornogrpahy charges hadn’t been released to the press, they were being used as a bargaining chip Rafael had said. And you’re pretty sure Rafa had been the one to give the Feds that tip. In the process he had taken on the role of villain so that the neighborhood could keep their hope, even if it did come in the package of Alex Munoz.

Rafael takes a deep breath, “He wasn’t just cheating on Yelina. He was sexting with a fifteen year old girl. He asked for explicit photos even after he knew her age.” 

Lucia’s voice is thick with emotion, “Why didn’t you tell me?”

He bites his lip, “I had hoped, you would have had faith in me. That you would have trusted I was doing the right thing. Like you raised me to do . . . like Abuelita did.” 

You watch Rafa’s hands as you wait for Lucia to say something. They’re buried in Benny’s fur, and the dog is pressed right up against him. 

Finally she says, “I need to go.”  

Neither of you stop her. You wait until she slips out the door to go to him. He slumps down as you gather him to you, and he buries his head against your chest. You hold him to you and kiss the top of your head, and after a few minutes he stands up. His eyes are red, and you know he’s shed a few tears. 

You cup his face with your hands and thread your fingers through his hair, “You are a good man Rafael Barba. The best man I have ever known.” 

His lips quirk up into a small smile, “Kiss me. Por favor." You do just that.

It takes him a few minutes to pack up what he needs to take home, tomorrow is Saturday and he has the day off. You plan to spend it showing him how much you love him. For now though, you need to go pick up his abuelita and head to a party. 

“Are you ready to hold Noah and make fun of Amaro?” 

“That, and spending time curled up with you, are some of my favorite things in the world.”

You smile, “Don’t forget your Harvard sweatshirt, and the law, and making Rita squirm.” 

“All that pales next to you.” 

“Sweet talker.” 

The ride to Catalina’s apartment is spent trying to make Rafa laugh. You succeed halfway through when you tell him about the time you and Cragen had been practicing your pitching outside the old precinct, and you broke a window with the ball. The report he filled out for it had said a pigeon had broken it by flying into it, and the higher ups had come to investigate. Everyone in the precinct had backed up his story. 

“I can’t believe he did that.” 

“Uncle Don is really well liked. Not by the higher ups, but by the people who matter. There was apparently this money laundering scheme and when he exposed the real culprit, a dirty cop, it made him quite a few enemies with the bureaucrats.

“But everyone who served under him loves him. He’s like a dad.” 

“I know he helped Rollins a few months ago with her gambling thing. Why do you call him Uncle Don? You don’t call Munch or Finn anything like that.” 

“Liv, Elliot, and the others were always in and out. I spent the most time with Uncle Don. He told me once that I came into his life at a bad time. He’d just lost his wife, she was a flight attendant who died in a plane crash. I think I was something to focus on other than the loss or drinking again. I did homework in his office, and on late nights I would fall asleep on his couch.

“I called him uncle Don one time when he came to pick me up from school. I was sick and Liv was working a case, and she had to authorize him to come pick me up. She put him down as my uncle, and I made a show out of calling him that.” 

“That’s nice.” 

“Even when Liv went to work cyber I would still meet up with him to throw a ball around in the park.” 

Rafa stops short, “Wait a minute, are you saying Liv left SVU at one time?” 

“She and Elliot got into a big fight. She worked Computer crimes for a while, and then did a few weeks undercover with the FBI one summer. That was the summer I had to go to camp. I wasn’t happy. But, they made up and she came back.” 

“I can’t imagine anyone driving Liv away from SVU.” 

You’re nearly to Catlina’s door, but you have to say this, “Elliot was a good man, but that partnership was all consuming Raf. I didn’t see it then, I was too young, but I’m happy he left . . .in a way. She’s grown a lot since he left. He was a crutch and she needed to learn how to stand without him.” 

There’s a moment of silence as he knocks on Abuelita's door, “If I ever meet him, I’m going to punch him.” 

You stare at him, “No you won’t. He’d kill you where you stand.” 

“You don’t think I could take him?” 

“No, but if he ever comes around again, which I doubt he will, ask Finn for help. He always hated Elliot. Ed too. Ed would help you.” 

He doesn’t have time to answer that, as his grandmother opens the door. "¡Estás aquí!"

She hugs and kisses Raf, and then does the same to you before stepping out and locking the door behind her. Out of the corner of your eye you watch her sneak Benny a treat from her coat pocket. It was lucky you walked Benny a lot! And with that, the three of you head out! 

#ada rafael barba #rafael barba #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba x you #rafael barba/you #rafael barba fanfiction #rafael barba imagine #law and order svu #Law and Order: Special Victims Unit #law and order svu fanfiction #law and order svu imagine #svu fanfiction #svu imagines #svu #law and order svu reader insert

[my-emotional-self]

Toxic Love Chapter 16

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader, Bucky Barnes x Reader, Steve Rogers x Reader x Bucky Barnes

Summary: Finding out your soulmates were Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes was one thing. But when someone from your past comes back to haunt you, you have to figure out if a relationship with two super soldiers is something you really want to pursue or if you’d rather go back to your comfortable single life.

Series Warnings: 18+, Swearing, Angst, Fluff, past mentions of rape, self-harm, attempted rape, domestic violence, stalking, death threats, possible Dark!Steve?, Steve will be an asshole a LOT in this series but I don’t know how dark it will get, explicit sexual content, mental health issues, kind of A/B/O dynamics but not really (no they are not actual wolves, more like the hierarchy), mentions of suicide, flashbacks of suicide, nightmares, panic attacks

A/N: There will be no taglist for this story! I apologize in advance!

“Do you have your taser?” Steve and Bucky said collectively as you gathered your purse in your arms and slipped on your shoes.

“Oh my god,” you giggled your response. “Yes, I do.”

It was the day after your surprise birthday party and since you were now going to be heading to St. Lucia tomorrow, you realized you didn’t have much clothing for any kind of tropical place. Darcy had quickly agreed to go shopping with you and that’s why you were leaving the tower.

In the last month you barely left the tower. Not that you felt imprisoned at all. No. It was that you were comfortable. Now that everything was out in the open with Steve and Bucky, you didn’t feel the need to leave the tower much. The last time you left was for your appointment with Dr. Wang and both Steve and Bucky took you there.

They were the ones who normally liked to go with you out of the tower, but since they would be on vacation with you for a whole week, they needed to get some last minute things done for any upcoming missions. So, it would be you and Darcy and you were really excited to spend some time with her.

“Be safe and be good,” Steve said as he gave you a chaste kiss to your lips. You smiled at him, nodding your head.

“I don’t want to get a call that you are in jail,” Bucky joked as he kissed you next.

“It’s only going to be me and Darcy going shopping and out to brunch,” you replied, folding your arms in front of your chest.

“That’s what we’re worried about,” came Steve’s smart ass remark.

~~~

“How many swimsuits do you own?” Darcy asked as the two of you walked down the sidewalk where all the good shopping was. Clint had dropped you two off seeing as neither Steve nor Bucky wanted you two walking that far and you had agreed to stay within a certain radius of where the shopping and dining was. Especially after they found out that John or John’s friends had been sending you threatening letters and messages. But what you didn’t know, was that the bracelet that Steve and Bucky got you for your birthday, also had a tracker in it. They planned on telling you while on vacation, but it brought them a piece of mind and set them at ease while you weren’t with them.

“Umm, I honestly don’t think I even own one,” you remarked.

“Shut the front door. How do you not even own one swimsuit?”

You gave her a shrug. “I don’t know. I guess I just didn’t really have any time or anywhere to go swimming recently. Before meeting Steve and Bucky, I never really got out to do much at all.”

Darcy linked her arm with yours and smiled at you. “Well, I’m glad I’ve met you because now I get some more girl time. With Nat being away on missions more often than Clint, I get stuck with him a lot.”

“Oh come on. You love him and you know it,” you teased back.

She sighed, “I do. I really do. But he is obsessed with going into the vents at the tower and he always wants me to go. He doesn’t realize that I have boobs and a butt that most certainly won’t fit in those vents.”

The two broke out into laughter and you loved how easy it was being around your friend. You didn’t have many friends growing up. With your parents mental health issues, you didn’t want to bring anyone over to the house and when you were invited over for a sleep over or to hang out somewhere else, you always said no because you felt like you had to keep an eye on your parents.

“Oooh, get this one!” Darcy put the slinkiest red bikini in your hands and your eyes grew wide at how little fabric there was.

“Darcy, there is literally nothing to this bikini,” you whispered to her, heat flooding your cheeks at the thought of wearing something like this at the beach.

“That’s the point! You’re on vacation with two of the hottest men in the world whom, by the way, you have wrapped around your finger. And plus, Tony’s place has its own private beach meaning no one else but you three get access to it,” Darcy spoke as she continued to look at more bathing suits. She did have a good point, but you would still feel utterly exposed in something like this. “And we’ll just get you a few more suits for when you want to go to the public beaches.”

“How many suits do you think I should get?”

“Uhh, at least seven. You’re going to be there for a whole week so you need to have one for each day.”

While you had more than enough money in your bank account, you realized Darcy had a major shopping problem and she was to help you drain it dry. At least she offered to buy you lunch today.

The two of you shopped for a few more hours. The sun was shining high in the sky and it felt so good to get fresh air and spend some girl time with Darcy. She helped you pick out a bunch of new clothes including some light weight dresses as she thought all your clothing was too dark and heavy for some place tropical, swim suit cover ups and her personal favorite, lingerie. You didn’t own anything more than a few matching pairs of bras and underwear and they weren’t even lace. Darcy was an expert at lingerie, stating both Natasha and Clint loved seeing her in it.

While you had spent a bit more than you wanted to, you knew it was for something good. Spending an entire week with your two soulmates on a tropical island for a vacation sounded heavenly and you couldn’t wait for it to be tomorrow already. Never in your life had you gone on vacation, let alone a vacation that is fully paid for.

After lunch, the two of you went to Target to pick up some last minute essentials and a few travel sized items. Darcy explained that Tony would have everything covered at the beach house but you just wanted to be on the safe side.

Once done, Darcy called Clint to pick you two up and you headed back to the tower. Your feet were killing you, even though you wore your comfiest pair of shoes. It was a long day on your feet and you couldn’t wait to get this vacation started.

“Honey I’m home,” you sand as the elevator doors opened to your apartment.

Neither Steve nor Bucky were in the living room or kitchen as you walked into the apartment. There was however a note sitting on the kitchen counter for you.

Y/N,

We hope you had fun shopping with Darcy today and we can’t wait to spend the next week with you in paradise. We had a few errands of our own to run and will be back in time for dinner.

Xoxo

Steve and Bucky

While they could have easily sent you a text telling you they would be out for a little bit, you couldn’t help but smile at how old fashioned they were. Honestly, you loved the notes they had left around the apartment for you to find. Sometimes on your pillow when you woke up, or a sticky note attached to your mirror in the bathroom. It was little sentiments like that, that made your heart swell with pride knowing they were all yours.

With your numerous bags in hand, you headed to your bedroom so you can begin packing for your week in paradise.

Dumping your purse and bags on your large bed, you went into the closet and you pulled out the suitcase that Darcy lent you. Hauling the suitcase onto your bed with a grunt, you opened it and admired just how much space there was in the suitcase. At least you didn’t have to pay extra for the large suitcase since you were taking Tony’s private jet.

Just thing, your phone alerted you to a text message. Rummaging it out of your purse, you turned your phone on. The smile instantly wiped from your face. Your blood running cold as you started at the words.

I’ll be seeing you soon babe. I can’t wait to get my hands on your precious body. –J

Your heart began to race. It was getting harder to breathe.

“Miss Y/N,” F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice echoed faintly in the room. Your vision started to get blurry and you didn’t know if that was from the tears or if you were having a panic attack. “I am calling Captain Rogers right now.”

Your knees buckled from under you as you reached onto the bed to somewhat break your fall. This couldn’t be happening. How did he get your number? He knew where you used to live, but you had changed your number and made sure to not give it out to anyone. How could he possibly have gotten your phone number? Your breathing was ragged and you were beginning to gasp for air. If he had your phone number, that meant he was closer than ever to you. Closer to finding you. But he was still in prison, he was still locked up. Right?

“Sweetheart,” Steve’s voice came over the speakers. “What’s going on? F.R.I.D.A.Y said your heartbeat is skyrocketing.”

“He-he, John,” you couldn’t get the words out as you were gasping for air.

“Breathe doll,” now it was Bucky’s voice you were hearing. “Just breathe. We are in the elevator right now coming to you but you have to breathe.”

You tried. Fuck did you try to breathe but it was so hard. It felt like someone was squeezing your chest. It hurt. You hurt. Your vision began to go dark as you faintly heard your name being called over and over again.

Slumping down on the ground, you thought this was it. This was how you were going to die. Alone. Terrified. This isn’t how you wanted to die. You wanted to die old and wrinkly with Steve and Bucky by your side, not like this.

Before you could full go unconscious, you felt yourself being picked up in strong arms. Your vision slowly coming back and you realized you were on your bed, sitting down with your back against something hard and firm, yet soft at the same time.

“Y/N? Sweetheart can you hear me?” Steve’s worried voice consumed your mind as you slowly began to blink, seeing him kneeling in front of you on the bed. It was then that you realized you were laying against Bucky, his metal arm around your front and holding your chest tightly to him. “Good girl. There’s our girl. Now I need you to breathe. Feel Bucky breathing behind you. Match his breathing sweet girl.”

You took a few gasping breaths and you could feel Bucky’s heartbeat against your back. Doing as best you could, you could begin to feel your heartbeat starting to regulate. Reaching up, you placed your hand over Bucky’s metal arm, wanting to keep anchored to him.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y, what happened?” Steve’s voice was calm and collected now as he watched you start to finally relax, eyes closed.

“It appears Miss Y/N had a massive panic attack,” the A.I responded.

You could hear Steve take a deep sigh and you opened your eyes, finding his blue orbs staring back at you. “What brought this one sweetheart?”

Instantly your chin began to quiver. “Wh-where’s my pho-phone?” you choked out?

Steve looked around the floor for your phone as you Bucky kept you anchored to him. You felt as if you were to move from your position you would fall apart.

Once Steve found your phone, he handed it to you. You didn’t want to look at it. You couldn’t. Instead, you shook your head and with the saddest voice, you told him to open it.

He looked between you and Bucky and then down to your phone in his hand. You didn’t have a password on it so Steve pressed the button on the side to light your phone up. He didn’t even need to swipe to open. He saw the text. It was right there, staring back at him. Steve’s hand gripped your phone so tight you were honestly shocked he didn’t break the phone in half.

#steve rogers #steve rogers fanfic #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes smut #steve rogers smut #dark! steve rogers

[navalcriminalimagines]

from NYC to DC

request: I was hoping to request a Barbra x reader where the reader and him have a really bad break up (honey make it angst asf I’m in the mood for that atm lmao don’t know why ) and they transfer because of it to NCIS (ouuuu cross over ) and they are happy and with her son/daughter.

author’s note: anon, again, thank you for your request!!! i hope you’ll have as much fun as i had writing this! that’s definitely not how i pictured it at first but inspo kept coming along the way!! maybe... just maybe, if you guys want it, i could make this a series... if you’re interested :) 

words: 4,840

warnings: making out, slight smut, betray, cheating

tags: @averyhotchner​

6 weeks.

6 weeks since you and your husband hasn’t been intimate. And it was way too long for you.

You and Rafael had been together for almost 9 years, married for 5, with a 4 years old little boy. Your record with any sexual activity was 3 months and to be fair, it was after you gave birth to Eduardo.

It’s been 6 weeks now, you had no idea why and you couldn’t wait another day. When you arrived at the office, you let your boss know you were taking your afternoon off. There’s nothing your team can’t take care of, so he agreed.

Right after, you texted your mother-in-law Lucia, asking her if she could take Edu for the night, maybe until Sunday. The plan was not to leave the bed and your husband’s naked body until you had to.

Before going home, you stopped to buy some lingerie. Tonight needs to be perfect, and what’s better than surprising your husband with new spicy lingerie?

You spent the afternoon cleaning the apartment, cooking Rafael’s favorite Cuban dish and preparing yourself. You looked at yourself in the mirror, with the lingerie on, wondering if you were the problem. Is he not attracted to you anymore? Obviously your body changed after you gave birth, but it never seemed to bother him before. Why now? Rafael never left you this long without touching and kissing your body, letting you know how much he loves you and wants you. Why doesn’t he do that anymore? What’s wrong with you?

A bit before 6, you texted your husband, asking what time he’s coming home. That’s something you often do, so there would be no surprise there.

Dunno, 8 maybe. He answered. But you couldn’t until 8.

Edu’s asking for you... could you make it for dinner? You sent.

Sure :)

Perfect. You made last minute prep before he got there. You curled your long hair just like he loves it, you only had mascara on, to make your blue eyes look bigger. You heard him coming home and looked at yourself one last time in the mirror. If nothing happens, something’s really wrong, you told yourself.

Rafael had a confused look on his face. His son was nowhere to find, the apartment smelled like ropa vieja. Candles were lit, and a bottle of wine was waiting on the coffee table. “Y/N?” He called.

“Hey handsome!” You emerged from the hallway, with a smile on your face. You looked gorgeous. You had Rafael’s favorite green dress on, his heart sunk. He stopped breathing for a moment.

“Wait, what day it is?” He asked.

“No particular day, Raf, don’t worry,” you chuckled and walked to him. “Just want a nice night with my husband,” you put your arms his neck and kissed him softly.

“Love the sound of that,” he smiled. “Love the smell too,” he kissed you again.

“I made your favorite,”

He laughed, “I wasn’t talking about the food. Although it does smell good. But I meant your scent,” Rafael gently kissed your shoulder and you heard him breath in your scent, “Victoria’s Secret bare vanilla,” he said, with his head hide in your neck.

“Oh! Talk dirty to me,” you chuckled. When he emerged from your neck, you took a moment to look at him, at his face, his eyes, his mouth... “I miss you, Raf,”

His eyebrows clenched together. “I’m here, amor. Always been,” he said.

“I know. I-it’s just—“ you shook your head, “Nevermind. Wine?” You offered and he nodded.

The night began well. You had small talks over dinner, Rafael enjoyed the dish you made. “It gets better every time,” he told you. But things went south pretty quickly when you took him to the bedroom. You made him sit on the edge of the bed and started to undress in front of him. “¡Coño!” You heard him. You smiled and continued the show until you were in your lingerie. “New?” He asked and you nodded.

“You’re gorgeous,” he said. He sat on his lap and started to kiss him deeply. You felt his hands on your body and gosh how you missed his touch and his kisses.

You couldn’t feel his crotch growing between your legs. You didn’t think further about it first, and you laid him down on the bed. You unhooked his belt, undid his button and put his pants down. You softly touched him through the fabric, waiting for his cock to react. Still nothing. Rafael wasn’t looking at you anymore, he was focused on the ceiling, as if he was wanting for this to be over.

“You okay over there?” You asked, a bit worried.

“Yeah, yeah. Keep going,” he answered.

You did as he said. You freed his cock and went to suck him. You did everything you usually do but nothing. There was no reaction. “Rafael? Something’s wrong?” You were already frustrated and it was getting worse.

“Lo siento, amor. I don’t know what’s happening,” Rafael sat back on the bed and put his boxer brief back on. He had a very sad look on the bed. You were lost. Is he really not attracted to you anymore? You sat in front of him, held his hand and tried to avoid the tears that were threatening to come out.

“Talk to him, my love. Do you not want me anymore?” You asked.

“No! Of course not! I do,” he interjected.

“I want to believe you but—your body says otherwise,” you said. “It never happened before, no matter how exhausted you were,”

He sighed but stayed silent. You saw a single tear running down his cheek. You closed the gap between you and your husband and hugged him. Rafael had his face buried in your chest, and you felt he was crying. “Baby, tell me what’s going on, please,” you begged.

“I’m so sorry, amor,” he cried, “so sorry,” he repeated.

“What for? Tell me,” you softly grabbed his face in your hand and forced him to look at you. “What are you sorry for?” You asked again. Still crying, he opened his mouth to talk but closed it immediately. “Rafael, please,” you begged again.

“It meant nothing, Y/N. It was a stupid mistake, one terribly stupid mistake and I feel so bad,” understanding what it was trying to tell you, you let go off his hands, taking an inch away from him. Disgust was obvious on your face. But you couldn’t say anything, this can’t be true. It can’t be happening. “Amor, I swear—“

“Shut up!” You exclaimed. There was so many things going through your mind at this very moment, you didn’t even know where to begin. Your heart was beating so fast, you swore it was coming out off your chest. Rafael tried to grab your hands but you swapped them away.

“Who?” You choked up.

“Does it matter?”

You stood up and started to put your clothes back on. “You bet your ass it does! I wanna know who that bitch is! You’ll take care of your case later! But don’t put your hopes high, you ruined our fucking marriage!”

“No, no!” Rafael interjected and jumped from the bed. He grabbed your arms to stop you from putting a sweater on. Your whole body was shaking from anger. Rafael saw something in your eyes he never saw before. Indeed, he knew he ruined the relationship. “There’s a way I can make you forgive me. It has to. We can’t—“

“We can’t what, Rafael?” You snapped. “End our relationship? Destroy our marriage, our family? I believe that’s what you did!” You pushed him aside so you could walk out of the bedroom. Rafael briefly lost his balance and found himself on the bed but he immediately went back on his feet and followed you. He grabbed you by your waist, preventing you from going further. He didn’t have time to say something, “I can’t believe I’ve been so stupid!” You weren’t really talking to your husband, but more letting your anger out, “Here I was, trying to understand what was happening. Asking myself why we didn’t have sex for weeks, thinking it was maybe my fault, that something was wrong with me, or with my body— I spent the entire afternoon preparing this night, so we could find each other again, so that it was just us. Just you and me—“ Rafael was holding you from behind, you didn’t have the strength to fight his grip. You were both crying, “I can’t believe you did this, Rafael. And for what? To empty your fucking balls?”

“I know I have no excuses,” Rafael had buried his head in your back, still holding you. He didn’t want to let go off you. He was scared that if he let you go, you would never come back. Maybe he was onto something. “I don’t know why I did it. I want to say it was because of alcohol, because I had a few drinks but, it doesn’t change anything, I know it,”

“You damn right it doesn’t,” you said, still crying. His hands were locked in your front, you took a look at his wedding band. How could he ruin your vows? Your promises?

“Please, amor,” this made you lose it. Being a federal agent makes you much stronger than him, so you didn’t struggle to get out off his arms.

“Do not ‘amor’ me, Rafael. You lost that right. You lost when you fucked that bitch. Hell, you lost it when your lips—“ you couldn’t finish your sentence. That thought of him with someone else makes you sick in your stomach. Rafael could see it on your face.

“I will do anything to make you forgive me, Y/N. I swear—“ he paused. “do you want me to get on my knees and beg for your forgiveness? Cause I’ll do it,” you saw him starting to kneel.

“Don’t even—“ you warned him and he stopped on his tracks. “We’ve been together for almost 10 years and you know me better than anyone. You know that cheating is a deal breaker,”

“Yes, I do. But—“ he tried.

“There’s no ‘but’, Rafael. I will never trust you again. I will never be able to look at you, to—kiss you or do anything, without thinking of what you did,”

“What does that mean?” He had this terribly sad look on his face, as if the world was ending. But it’s all on him. You can’t feel guilty about what you’re going to say.

“It’s over. We’re done,”

Rafael did beg for several minutes. At some point, he was getting so weak from the cries and the pain, he fell on his knees and held onto your waist. He apologized too many times you could count, he made promises, offers. He was willing to do anything so you could forgive him. But you couldn’t. Not now, not ever.

Neither of you slept that night. You couldn’t even look at him anymore. You didn’t know where to go, or what to do but you needed some fresh air. “Where you going?” Rafael asked when he saw you putting on your shoes.

“None of your damn business,” you slammed the door behind you.

After that, it all happened quickly. You did your best not to alarm your son but he noticed he wasn’t seeing his parents together anymore. You spent half your time at your best friend’s place. You focused on your job and your son, doing your best to avoid Rafael.

There was one thing you needed to know; who he cheated on you with. It didn’t take you long to figure out it was his coworker Olivia Benson. Rafael and you always made important not to mix professional and personal life, which is why you only met her a few times.

One night, you waited for her next to her car. You didn’t care she was a Lieutenant, and that you were in front of her precinct, just like you didn’t care when you saw that she wasn’t alone. Sonny Carisi was walking her to her car when you emerged from the dark.

“Mrs Barba, hey!” The detective greeted you, “if you’re looking for your husband, he’s not here. Also, what’s wrong with him lately? He’s been more annoying than usual,” he smiled.

“You’re about to find out, detective,” on those words, you didn’t think twice before throwing a punch right into Olivia’s jaw and nose. It put all your strength in it, she lost her balance and thankfully for her, Sonny caught her. Was he supposed to arrest you? What was happening? “Next time you want to screw up with an ADA, chose a single one. But don’t worry now, he fucking is,” you just said and left.

“Lieu, what do I—?” Sonny asked, confused.

“Let her go, Carisi,” Olivia answered, holding her bloody nose, “You better not say a single word about this. To anyone,”

“How’s my favorite New Yorker agent?” Tobias Fornell greeted you with a hug. All the people you work with notice that something was wrong but no one dared to ask. You met Tobias a few years ago on the job, you immediately hit it off and he became a close friend. So close that it’s in his arms that you let go your pain, and cried every tear you had left. “Not so great, apparently,” he whispered. Fornell let you cry and calm down in his arms. “Wanna talk about it?”

You explained everything during a coffee break. A part of him wanted to go find and beat the crap out of Rafael. He probably would have done it if you didn’t have a little boy with him. Edu doesn’t deserve to see his father with cuts and bruises.

“What do you want to do now?” He asked.

“I have no idea. I need some time away from New York I think. Everything here makes me thing of him and I—I can’t deal with it,”

“Will ‘some time away’ be enough? I mean—if you’re up for a big change, NCIS team is one man down,”

At first, you refused. You weren’t ready for a change that big... until you broke into tears in front of a theater on Broadway, where Rafael took you for your first date. You couldn’t stay in New York. So you called Tobias and asked if NCIS had found someone. They hadn’t.

Since the breakup, you just dropped Eduardo in front of the apartment’s door, waited for Rafael to open and immediately left. This time you got in, to your husband’s surprise. His hopes went straight back up. You asked your son to go into his bedroom for a moment so you could talk with Rafael.

“How are you?” He asked, not sure it was the right move.

“Let’s not do that. I just want to let you know I’m moving to DC. With Edu—“

“Wait, what? No, there’s no—“

“I’m not asking for your permission, Rafael. I’m telling you. You’ll see your son every time you want to, DC is just a 3 hours train ride, okay? I can’t stay here. Not only you ruined our marriage, our family but you also ruined New York for me,”

“I—I can understand that, Y/N. But DC? Can’t you move somewhere I can see my son right after work if I want to?”

“Work opportunity,” you answered.

“What if I want him to stay here with me? And that you’re the one to comes on weekend to see him?” Rafael was on papa bear mode. He starts to understand you won’t ever forgive him, and he’s willing to accept it, no matter how bad it hurts. It’s all on him. But taking his son away? That’s a total different thing.

“If that’s what you want, hire a fucking lawyer. I’m leaving next week,”

Before you left the apartment you and Rafael shared for years, the apartment where Edu spent the first four years of his life, you did something that broke his heart for good. You left your wedding band on the coffee table.

* * *

Fornell welcomed you and your son in his house until you found a place of your own. You had a babysitter on demand with Emily. Eduardo likes her a lot already.

“Who is she again?” Tony asked his boss.

“A friend of Fornell. She was a FBI agent in New York, and now she’s with us,”

“You owned him something?” 

Tony quickly regretted judging you without meeting you first. He didn’t like the idea of a complete stranger joining the team, but a few hours after your arrival, he knew he was wrong. You are lovable and you know your job. “Let’s go downstairs so you can meet Abby, Ducky and Palmer,” Gibbs told you and you followed him. Never in the world you had such a warm welcoming as the one Abby gave you. “I made this for you,” she offered you a sweater, “And Fornell told me your son loves to play to dress up, so I made him--this,” she showed off a dress that looked a little gothie. “It was one of my dress that I don’t wear anymore. I made a few adjustments and hopefully, it will suit--Eduardo?” 

“Yes, but everybody calls him Edu. When I call him Eduardo, he knows it’s trouble,” you chuckled and took the dress from her, “He is going to love it! Thank you so much, Abigail, you didn’t have too,” 

“Wow, she called me Abigail,” she said, looking at Gibbs. “Only Ducky does. But I can get used to it, coming from you too,” she smiled. 

The next day you showed her a picture of Edu wearing the dress. Indeed he was loving it, he asked to sleep with it. 

As you were looking for apartment, you realized you could actually make a dream of yours come true and buy a house. Your own house. New York didn’t give this opportunity. The houses the city had to offer didn’t look like real houses to you, that’s why you agreed with Rafael on buying an apartment on Park Avenue. But this was a new life. This is the time. You started to settle up, to know how much you could loan to the bank. Considering you had to buy every fourniture, a new car, and have something to eat in the fridge, it appeared impossible. For a moment you regretted no asking for an alimony and you growled at yourself.

“Everything okay over there?” you heard Gibbs asking from his desk. It was 9pm and you and him were the only ones left.

“Why are property prices so high?” you asked and you heard him chuckle.

“That’s why I’m glad I bought my house years ago,” Gibbs stood up and walked up to your desk. “Want to buy a place?” 

“I thought it could be the time, but when I see the prices, everything I have to buy and my salary--it doesn’t match,” 

“No alimony?” 

“Hell no. Rafael wanted to, at least for Edu, but I told him that if he wants to give money to his son, he can do it when he’s visiting and put it on his bank account,” 

“Your 4 years old has a bank account?” Gibbs smiled.

“For when he’ll be older, yeah. We never know what can happened,” 

Your boss took a quick look at your computer, “What about that house?” he said. You were looking for houses on sell online, you stopped on a house. Not for what it looked like but for the price.

“It’s a smoking ruin, Gibbs. I clicked on it because that’s the best I can actually pay for,” you showed him the pictures of the house. 

“With some handy work, we can make something of it,” he said.

“We?” 

“You, me, Fornell, and probably the rest of the team if you ask them,”

“That ain’t gonna happen,” 

Turns out, the next day when you arrived in the bullpen, everyone was there, looking at the screen. “’Grab your gear’?” you said, approaching your fairly new team. 

“More like ‘buy the house’,” Abby interjected. You understood and shoot a glare at your boss, who was smiling. “So--all the wood works definitely go to Gibbs, Bishop said she’s good with the painting. McGee and I can do the floors,” 

“I can take care of the bathroom, I redid ours,” Jimmy spoke up. 

“Autopsy gremlin--that’s very unexpected,” 

You watched them talking about the house for a moment. Your new team was planning to spend many weekends working a house you haven’t buy yet. Who are those people? You only met them weeks ago, and they are acting like...a family. That thought brought so many feelings inside you. You excused yourself and ran to the ladies room. “I got it,” Gibbs said the team and joined you. Thankfully there was no lady in there. You were crying over the sink and Gibbs gently took your hand and brought you in his arms. 

“What’s wrong, Y/N?” he asked. 

“That--what’s happening over there. It’s wrong,” 

“Gonna need a little more info,” 

You rise from his arms and looked at him, “There’s no way all of you are ruining your days off to help me,” 

“We want to,” he spoke for everyone.

“But--why? Why would you do that?” 

“Because that’s what families do, Y/N. Simple as that,” you looked down at your first, trying not to cry again.

“Rafael has been my only family, ever,” you confessed. 

“Figured that out. Let us become your new family,” 

You nodded, unsure of what is actually meant. “Damn you for reading my file,” Gibbs chuckled and invited you to go back to the team. 

After many appointments for weeks, the house was finally yours. And on the team’s first day off after you got the keys, everyone showed up in used clothes. “Let’s get dirty!” Abby exclaimed, getting in your house. It was yours. That’s something you never thought would happen. Especially after the past months. 

Ducky became the boss on that project. He made to-do lists and assigned the missions. Gibbs was in charge of the wooden floors, Bishop and Abby went painting upstairs. As he said, Jimmy assigned himself to the bathroom. Tony and McGee worked on the minor repairs, and you were the floating agent. Going where you were needed. 

In the afternoon, Tobias showed up with Emily and Edu. Your son was wearing a overalls with doc martens and a baseball cap above his long dark hair. His fashion choices never stop to amaze you. “Mami!” he jumped into your arms. “Is it done yet?” he asked, excitingly. 

“Oh no, baby! I told you we still have to stay with uncle Toby and Em for a while,” 

You never had someone close enough to you and your son so that Edu would actually call them “Uncle” or “Aunt”. Now that’s what he’s doing with the entire team. “Can I see my bedroom?” 

You took him upstairs to his future bedroom. Ellie and Abby were painting the walls. “Edu! I love your overalls,” Abby exclaimed.

“I love yours aunt Abby,” 

“Wanna help the girls, baby?” you offered and Edu happily accepted. You went downstairs, helping Gibbs with the floor and your son stayed with your coworkers. 

“I don’t want my room to be white!” 

“Oh don’t worry, sweetie! We have to paint it white first and then you’ll choose the colors you want,” Bishop told Edu.

“Purple and green,” 

“That’s an interesting mix,” Abby smiled.

“Mamiiii!” Edu came running to you, “I’m gonna have a disney wall in my room!” 

“What?!” 

“Aunt Ellie said so,” 

You looked at Bishop who was standing right behind and she explained that she has a friend that will do it. For free. How amazing are those people. 

For weeks, the entire team spent at least all their sundays working in the house. It was going really well. The house was becoming a home. Your home. Yours and your son. The guys were building the furniture you had already bought, Gibbs was taking care of the kitchen with Tobias, Jimmy was still working on the bathroom with Ducky’s help and Ellie and Abby was taking care of the final touches. Edu was having fun with Emily in the backyard. 

“Phone!” everyone heard Gibbs shouting. All the phones were on the kitchen counter and Tobias checked the one that was ringing. When he saw “Rafael” written on it, he called for you. You answered and went on the porch in front the house. 

“Mami and I just arrived in DC, we’re staying for the weekend. Can I pick up Edu?” Rafael asked over the phone.

“I--yeah sure. I’m sending you the address,” 

You and Rafael only talk for your son. Edu told him you have a new house but Rafael doesn’t know you actually bought it. Your husband hears a lot about the team, Edu is fond of them. On one side, he likes that Edu is enjoying living in DC and the other side, he hates it. He wishes you and his son would come back. That you would forgive him from cheating on you. 

For several weeks after you left, Rafael considered moving to DC too. To be close to his son obviously but also hoping it would make you change your mind, or at least realized he’s willing to do anything for you. But he came to the conclusion it was a bad idea. You moved to get away from him, he had to respect that. 

Rafael and Lucia arrived in front of your house. You noticed the car through the window and told Edu his father was there. The little boy ran from the backyard to his father and his grandmother. “I miss you so much, cariño,” Rafael said, holding his son tight. 

You went out of the house to greet your ex mother-in-law, “Hola mija, it’s good to see you,” she said. You hadn’t seen her since you left DC months ago. 

“Papi, I have a disney wall in my room! Wanna see it?” 

Rafael looked at you for approval and you gave it. The four of you walked inside the house. The first people Rafael saw, were Tony and Tim. Tony had his thumb in his mouth, “What the hell did you do DiNozzo?” you asked.

“He took his thumb for the screw,” Tim laughed and so did Edu.

“Oh, you think it’s funny, little cubano?” Tony told your son, playfully. 

“Uh-oh,” you heard Edu say. He knew he was in trouble. He started to run in the house, chased by Tony. “Sorry,” you mouthed to Rafael, who stayed silent. What the hell did he do? Not only he lost you but you changed, and his son too. He lost his family, for good. He watched his boy getting grab by a man with silver hair. The guy gave a gentle kick to the one that was chasing Edu. 

“Thank you uncle Gibbs,” 

“Always, my bud,” 

Being his over dramatic self, Tony was on the floor, holding his stomach. “Boss has a new favorite, I’m gonna die,” 

“Cause you thought you once were my favorite?” Gibbs snapped. 

“Bye cruel world,” Tony said, holding his chest and pretending to die. Edu took advantages of it and jumped on the italian agent. “Okay, I’m alive again,” 

You and Rafael were watching them until you felt his hand on your arm. You looked at him, “Can we talk outside, por favor?” he asked. You told Lucia to sit on a chair and you joined Rafael on the porch’s stairs. “You look good,” he started to say. “Not just physically. You look like you’re in a good place with your life,”

“I am,” you agreed. 

“I’m glad. If you’re happy, I’m happy,” 

“Go to the point, Rafael,” 

“I’m dating Olivia,” he confessed. 

“Son of a--” you exclaimed but realized the house’s door was open. “Are you fucking serious, right now?” 

“Why do you care? Which one are you dating? ‘Uncle Tony’? ‘Uncle Tim’? ‘Uncle Gibbs’? Huh?” 

You were furious. For many reasons. He was dating someone before you even did, and moreover, it’s the woman he cheated on you with. That’s the ultimate betrayal to you. 

“One second,” you showed your finger in the air and went back inside the house. You came back a moment later, followed by Gibbs. You dragged him outside the house and stood right in front of Rafael. You took a breath and kissed Gibbs. All teeth and tongues. Right under your husband’s eyes. Your boss definitely didn’t fight you. He actually deepen the kiss, holding you by your waist, making your body arch. 

Tony was the first to see it - of course - and he called Tim. They were like kids watching their dad kissing the new beautiful woman of the neighborhood. You and Gibbs broke apart when you heard Rafael calling for Eduardo. 

“We will definitely talk about that later,” Gibbs told you.

#ncis x svu #ncis x svu crossover #ncis imagine #ncis #ncis fanfiction #ncis fiction #ncis fandom #law and order svu #Law and Order: Special Victims Unit #law and order special victims unit #rafael barba #rafael barba fanfic #rafael barba fic #rafael barba x reader #rafael barba imagine #sonny carisi #Olivia Benson #Leroy Jethro Gibbs #jethro gibbs #jethro gibbs x reader #leroy jethro gibbs x reader #jethro gibbs imagine #tony dinozzo #Tim McGee #abby sciuto #ellie bishop #ducky mallard #jimmy palmer #lucia barba

[tamagochiie]

late night escapades with hq boys + a song that goes along with it

genre: fluff! oneshots! character roster: bokuto koutaro, atsumu miya, sugawara koushi, kuroo tetsuro, oikawa toru a/n: i haven't been able to write in a while, and i'm really happy with these one shots. i kinda started this because i miss my friends and all the dumb things we used to do pre-quarantine.  anyway, i hope you enjoy! oh, and happy kuroo day! 😌✨

— bokuto koutaro [the way you remember me by st. lucia]

Without a doubt he's always been your number one go-to for a pick-me-up.

So, when you call him in the middle of night, without needing to finish your thought, he'll tell you he's on his way and hangs up the phone; and he'd be there in less than an hour.

You've got a lot of pent up emotions waiting to burst, so where does Bokuto take you? He'll drive you through the tunnels.

Bokuto glances over to you, one hand on the wheel and the other on the stick shift; his back relaxing against the cool leather of his seat. He coyly smirks at you as your weary eyes meets his; mischief twinkling in his golden irises. You hear a whirling above your head, and you look up to see the sunroof sliding open.

You raise a brow, tilting your head. "Koutaro, what are you—"

"In about 2 minutes we'll be in the tunnels," He cuts you off, his attention flickering from the road ahead to you ever so often, "and when we get there, you're gonna poke yourself through that sunroof, and you're gonna let everything out."

"I—I don't understand—"

He sighs,"Look dude, you've taken a lot of L's this month, and I love that you call me whenever you're about to bust, but I just don't think it's enough for you anymore. So, I'm just tellin' you to scream it all out."

You pout, still looking at him quizzically.Though odd in nature, Bokuto usually means well...most of the time he means well.

You shrug your shoulders and give to it, unbuckling your seat belt as you draw nearer to the tunnels. You rise from your seat and try to balance your weight on the cushion as you poke your head out the sunroof.

"You ready?!" Bokuto yells to you, tugging on the cuff of your sweats. "Yeah!" You reply as you start to pull yourself up.

The cool wind meets your cheeks and sends a euphoric feeling down your spine. There's a persistent white noise ringing in your ear as your heart begins to float away form your chest. Even if you don't scream, you already feel lighter than you had earlier.

Bokuto rolls down his window, sticking his head out like a dog as he continues to drive. "Raise your arms!" He shouts, the sound of his voice pulling you out of your daze.

You do as he says, but you close your eyes to let the feeling wash over you. You scream, you shout, and you even sing a little as the excitement thrums in your chest.

Bokuto closes his eyes for just a moment, shouting along with you as he smiles to himself; the wind rushing against his face.

Your voices echo, intertwining with each other's as you continue with your "woo-ing" and "cooing". You ride your high to its fullest, screaming to the top of your lungs as the weight that's made a home on your shoulders disappears.

Even when you're free from the bright lights of the tunnels and engulfed by the darkness of the night, you don't come down from your high. With your arms still raised and the wind in your face, you let yourself get lost in the moment, hoping to stretch it a little longer.

--atsumu miya [as we ran by the national parks]

Signing up to be Atsumu's friend was basically signing up for nothing but life long surprises.

He's unpredictable, coming and going into your life through a revolving door full of stories. He'll disappear for a little while, and when he feels like it, he'll resurface.

He's kind of like confetti; he'll go out with a bang, but he'll make sure to leave glimmering traces of himself behind for you to remember him by until he comes back;

And when he does, he'll immediately coming running to you like a boat towards a lighthouse.

He won't tell you he's on his way to pick you up, he'll already be there and call you out of your house to drag you somewhere while you're half asleep, still processing what's going on.

But no matter how much of an inconvenience it is for you, you can't help but give in anyway.

The winter air is thick; your knees begin to shake and your breaths grow ragged. You groan in pain, images of you shoving your foot up Atsumu's ass flash across your mind. If it wasn't for your lack of athletic abilities, you would've thrown your shoe at the back of his head by now.

"We're almost there!" He calls out to you, twisting his head to find you hunched over, finding support in your knees as you catch whatever oxygen that's still in you. "C'mon, don't give up on me now." His tone is playful, not a single sign of struggling from the twenty minute jog uphill you've just made.

The fallen leaves crunch beneath his feet as he walks back to you.

"You know, 'Tsumu," You gasp, trying set your pulse back to its resting rate, "I'm so close to killing you...I really am."

He takes your words lightly, disregarding the resentment laced in your words as he laughs heartily. "Ya don't mean that! Ya'd miss me too much, I know that for a fact."

There's a ringing in your ears that cuts Atsumu off mid-sentence; it dangerously nears to a C sharp. Your vision blurry ever so often as you train your eyes down to your bunny slippers.

The asshat didn't even let you change out of your shoes, let alone your clothes. He just showed up unannounced (as per usual), and dragged you out of the house because he had "something cool to show you".

"I—I don't think I can keep running." You huff.

"S'okay," He replies, "we can walk the rest of the way since we're close anyway...Here, gimme yer hand; I'll pull ya the rest of the way."

You raise your head; though he's sweating profusely, there isn't a single trace to tell you he's had a hard time as much as you have, or at least a little.

You narrow your eyes, glaring at him for his lax disposition. He's smiling down at you, eyes glimmering beneath the florescent light post as he waits for you to take your hand in his. You want to swat it away, but against your better judgement and sheer desperation, you take it anyway.

"Atta girl!" Atsumu cheers, still holding that damn smile.

You grumble the whole way through, whining about your feet aching and how dizzy you feel. Though it should've annoyed him or at least got a small rise out of him, but he only draws circles over your hand with his thumb, humming in response every now and then to let you know he's still listening.

Luckily for you, it only takes you both five minutes to reach...the very deserted destination.

"Oh my God, 'Tsumu," You groaned, throwing your head back as you try to pull yourself out of Atsumu's hold, but he only tightens his grip, "you pulled me out of bed for dirt?"

"I—What? No!" He rolls his eyes and pulls you close so you're standing next to him. "Why ya gotta be like that? I dragged yer ass outta bed for this!"

Your gaze follows to where he points, and the moment you see the view of the city before you, your eyes widen and your breath hitches in your throat.

The city lights twinkling, outshining the stars. You can hear the echoes of life from where you both stand, and all you can manage to say is, "Wow."

In all of your five years living in here, you never thought a sight like this was only a twenty-five minute walk away.

"Told ya it was worth it..." Atsumu slings he's arm around your neck and pecks a kiss on the crown of your head. "Ain't it cool havin' a friend like me?"

You shift beneath his arm, finding a more comfortable position in his hold as you pat his chest. "Yeah, you're alright..."

He squints at you, furrowing his brows at your poor choice of words and lack of excitment. You laugh at him, his crinkled nose and the deep frown lines on his forehead make him look like a child.

"Whatever," He sighs, pulling you close. "I know ya love me, ya don't even gotta say it."

"Shut up, 'Tsumu." You tease, burying your head into the dip of his neck. "All your talking's ruining the view."

—sugawara koushi [like real people do by hozier]

Just like Bokuto, Sugawara's your number one go-to except instead of having you screech into a tunnel, he'll be your soundboard.

Though he doesn't have a specific place he'll bring you to, Sugawara will definitely drive you around for hours and hours on end—anything that'll help calm your nerves or help you fall asleep.

He'll listen to your laughs, your cries, and even the quiet hum of your snores. He wants to be there for you in every moment you need him, hoping that one day you'll see him in a different kind of light.

But on the one night it rains, he thinks of something better for you to do to relieve your stress.

"You can't be serious..." A nervous laugh escapes you when Suga parks the car on the side of the empty highway, unbuckling his seatbelt before switching off the engine. "Ko-Koushi you can't be serious?"

"Live a little," Your name falls off the tip of his tongue so effortlessly, it completely escapes you that he's already getting out the car; and within seconds, he's completely drenched by the rain. He calls to you, motioning you to join him.

"You're crazy!" You shout through the glass, shaking you head as you laugh at him. "We'll get hit by a car!"

"No one's out here but us!" He argues. Suga begins to jump and down, dancing beneath the rain regardless of the lack of music playing in the background.

This is so stupid, you think to yourself, slumping into your seat. You sit there and watch as your best friend continues to dance in rain, smiling to himself as he spreads his arms open as if he's waiting for the sky to hug him back.

When he notices you still glued to your seat, he marches over to you with a devious grin painting across his lips. You rush to try and lock your door, but you're left betrayed by his car when he swings it open.

"Get out of the car," He sing-songs. "Get out of the car while I'm still asking nicely."

You widen your eyes, lips falling into an 'o'.

You think its best not to get out, fearing you might get hit by a car or something worse like catching a cold. But when Suga looks at you with a warm, comforting smile, holding his hand out to you, how could you possibly resist?

Kicking off your shoes, you slip your hand in his and step out of the car.

Slamming the door behind you, he slips one arm around your waist before bending down to swing the other beneath your knees, carrying you back to where he stood.

He spins you around, and you snake your arms around his neck tightly as you scream. Even in his recklessness he's careful with you, making sure his grip is tight on you. But when he feels you slipping from his hold, he carefully sets you down.

Your arms still around his neck. Suga cranes his neck just a little to meet your eyes; his smile charms you and you can't help but smile as well.

"Are you having fun?!" He shouts over the rai to make sure you can hear him. You nod your head as you wipe away the hair sticking to his face. "Yes I am!"

"Do you still feel like crying?!" He asks, still shouting.

"Not at all!" You reply. "I'm too busy worrying over the fact we might get run over! This is still crazy, Koushi!"

"Well, then you're just as crazy for joining me!"

"It's not like I had a choice, you jerk!"

Suga dismisses your last words as he flutters his eyes shut, pressing his forehead against yours . You stiffen at the sudden closeness, but oddly enough you don't mind it. You try not to choke on your own breaths, swallowing down a cough to keep you in this intimate moment you didn't know you were longing for.

Through your glossy vision, you take notice of his eyelashes. Was it always this long? Was he always this pretty?

You study his face; his clear skin, thick browns, cute little dimples in the corners of his mouth. He's so beautiful, you think. Was he always this beautiful?

You shut your eyes when you notice him blinking away the raindrops from his lashes.

"I like you," The rain is loud and thunderous, yet you can hear Suga's faint confession between the howling of the wind and the rhythm of the rainfall. Its as if for a moment, the rain died down just enough so you could hear his words as well as his nervous heart.

You bite your lips, keeping your eyes shut as you smile at his words; and he can see it. He can see your eyes moving beneath your eyelids; he cans see your lips quivering to smile, and he can feel you shaking between his arms.

It could be because you're cold, or it could be the because since the start of the year, you've had it rough and this was the first time in a long while you had something to be genuinely happy about without having to doubt it or worry that just like the storm, it'll eventually pass.

The moment you open your eyes, Suga's looking right at you, peering into your gaze as he waits for your response.

"How cheesy of you," You tease, "confessing to me in the rain."

"I thought you'd like it."

"Well, I like you, so I guess that's enough, isn't it?"

—tetsuro kuroo [real estate by adam melchor]

A bit random, but I'm a firm believer that Kuroo definitely likes to buy food from anywhere and park the car in an empty parking lot in the middle of the night to talk about whatever with you.

He'll call this adventurous, but you'll call it lazy.

It became a thing when you were both in high school; he'd come over in the middle of the night after you called and told him you weren't feeling your best.

he'd get you out of the house, not minding the time because he is a firm believer in physically getting out of the negative energy.

he'd bring you to convenience store because it was the only place open in your village, and share a meal with you that he bought as you both sit on the edge of the sidewalk and talked.

"How's my girl doing now?" The car circles around the parking lot once more before it comes to a slow stop. Kuroo rests his arm behind the headrest of your chair, looking at you intently as you wipe away a stray tear. "Still not-so great, huh?"

You shake your head as it hangs low. You don't want to meet his eyes, too embarrassed of yourself, but you must've forgotten that he's seen worse.

One of the many plastic bags Kuroo's got settled on his lap rustles as he digs a hand through the many snacks he bought at the convenience store. He pulls out an onigiri from the bag and sets it in one of the cupholders that's sitting just below the heater.

Turning the air up he says, "Food's just cookin', it'll be ready when you are." You can only mutter a soft 'thank you' in between your sniffling.

He sits in the silence with you, nudging your arm and patting your head ever so often, waiting till you ride out your crying to the fullest. He'll even wipe away the river of tears pooling at the tip of your chin.

You didn't feel like crying when you had first called Kuroo; you just wanted to use him as a soundboard to let all your pent up stress you've been trying to anchor through the week. But the moment you found yourself in his presence, you couldn't help but break. Its as if Kuroo was the comfort you were looking for in the pillow fort you made at home, or the warmth you were missing when you made yourself into a burrito blanket.

"I'm just tired," Your voice croaks as you whine to him. You lift your head to lean it against the headrest, flickering your eyes to Kuroo who looks at you intently, leaning in closely as if nothing else mattered but you."I'm so tired, and I don't know what to do...I-I feel so pathetic! Like, everything that I do doesn't measure up to how I want things to be—like—does that even make sense?"

"Plenty of sense," He hums. A soft smirk plays across his lips and you can already feel yourself healing.

You wipe away the stray tears. "You probably think I'm silly...I've cried over so many things so many times, you'd think I'd go dry by now, huh?"

He shakes his head, reaching out to you to cup your cheek. He softly grazes his thumb against your skin, and you can help but sink into his touch. "I think you're just perfect."

A laugh escapes you, but you don't tear your eyes away from him. "Thanks, Kuroo...You're always listening to me go on and on—you're a great friend."

His gaze lingers a little longer than usual, and you swallow the panic hitched in your throat when you notice him inching towards you. You close your eyes as the space between you lessens; you feel him hovering over you lips, his breath fanning against your skin.

"I also think I might be in love with you..." He whispers, his eyes flicking from your lips to your eyelids.

Your breath stays hitched in your throat and it takes all the energy you have left to quietly say, "Well, kiss me so you can find out."

—oikawa tooru [tell me by jonny jewel ft. saorise ronan]

oikawa's extraordinary efforts to make his life reflect in the same manner was one of many reasons you fell in love with him.

he was a bit dramatic in nature, so just like atsumu, he'd show up at your doorstep without a single warning to whisk you away at the dead of night.

in every visit, he'd always take you somewhere new. This always left you looking forward to the next time he'd come knocking on your door.

You giggle as he peppers kisses over your hand, intertwining your fingers together so effortlessly like the many times he's done before. With his eyes etched onto the softly lit road ahead, the florescent lights twinkle past you as Oikawa continues to drive.

You coil your hold around his toned arm, pulling the bed sheet you clung with you when he whisked you away. His lips curve into a soft smile just as he's about to kiss the top of your head.

"How much longer you?" You asked, your voice taut as its strained, fresh from slumber. He hums in response, cooing your name as he tells you its not much longer till you're there.

You wonder where he'll bring you next. At the top of a hill overlooking the city? A weird shop that had an underground bar? Though you aren't really dressed for the occasion, so maybe not.

You didn't mean to drift away so easily, but the sudden yet smooth halt jolts you back to your senses. Oikawa cups your face and draws circles over your skin, waiting for you to completely wake up.

When your eyes flutter open, a rather large neon sign greets you, reflecting onto the windshield, "The Neon Graveyard".

You squint your eyes before craning your neck back to look at Oikawa. "Toru, where are we?"

He does nothing but smile, leaving your question unanswered as he gently steps on the gas and begins to drive forward. He cranks the volume of the radio a little higher, setting the mood.

The place is canvased in old bright signs in different shapes and sizes, twinkling fairy lights, and everything other glowing thing you can possibly think of. Signs from buildings long forgotten and a string of lights that no longer gleamed for anyone.

The car once again comes to a halt and you feel Oikawa peeling away from you, making you frown. He only smiles, cupping your face to leave a kiss on your forehead before to tell you to get out of the car. You're reluctant, but you do so anyway.

Wrapped like a California Maki, you step out of the car and take in the sight before you. It isn't long till you feel a familiar pair of arms caging you in, swaying you back and forth to the beat of the radio faintly playing in the background.

"D'you like it?" Oikawa asks, his breath fanning across your ear. It sends a hot flash across you cheeks and all you can manage to do is nod. "I knew you would...A friend told me about it and I knew I just had to bring you here."

You rest against his back, leaning your head on his shoulder as he continues to sway you back and forth. Only until you manage to twist yourself around to come face to face with his eyes—eyes sparkling beneath the colorful lights.

"Tell me that you'll never leave me," He presses his forehead onto yours, his sigh warms your cheeks. His hands fall to your waist, weaving his fingers into a tight hold to pull your closer."I love you so much..."

You lean in to kiss him; the warmth of his cheeks meets the coolness of the palm of your hands. "I'll love you forever, Toru."

#tetsuro kuroo #oikawa tooru #bokuto koutaro #sugawara koushi #Miya Atsumu #haikyuu imagines #bokuto fluff #oikawa fluff #atsumu fluff #kuroo fluff #haikyuu!! #hq!! #mine #bokuto x reader #kuroo x reader #sugawara x reader #astsumu x reader #oikawa x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu headcannons #kuroo imagines #oikawa imagines #bokuto imagines #sugawara imagines #haikyuu oneshots #i cant believe i spent so much time on this someone pls read this

[dawn-of-tomorrow]

shoutout to @punishing-gray-raven-ocs for this ask game!! (didin't expect to be tagged with one so soon lolol but i'm overjoyed~~ ｡ﾟ(ﾟ´Д｀ﾟ)ﾟ｡❤️❤️)

1) What made you even think of trying Punishing Gray Raven? What made you stick with it?

Funny story actually-- I've long heard about PGR, way back when it was first released even, but I just didn't give it a chance back then mainly because it was in CN and I couldn't understand shit (rather ironic given how I am now lmao).

As for why I decided fairly recently, a couple of months give or take, to give PGR a shot? It's mainly due to the fact that I heard that the Global version would be out very soon, so I thought why not dive into what I've missed so far... not knowing that I'd become THIS obsessed with the game, aha~.

The most obvious thing that made me stick to this game are the interesting cast of characters, the "fun" story, the amazing yet simple game mechanics, and etc. etc.

2) What problems, if any, do you have with PGR?

Honestly speaking, the thing that most VEXES me at the moment about PGR, specifically PGR Global, is the wonky translations. It feels like a group of half-assed fan translators and one official translator who's not doing a good enough job with reigning everyone in instead of feeling like a group of professional translators who know what they're doing. Hell, I've seen better translations from some of my twitter mutuals!

3) Who is your favorite Construct, and why?

Lee. There's no question about it, Lee is my most favorite Construct at the moment (and forever perhaps ohoho~). As for why, god, hold that mic for a bit, I'm gonna go on a fucking rant. Ehem.

First of all, let's start with the most basic of things, like his appearances; As Palefire, he looks like this suave, very aloof, super serious, unapproachable, and "gets shit done efficiently" type of person, and while that description certainly isn't wrong, it's also hiding more layers of Lee's overall personality; as Entropy, he certainly looks and feels bit more casual than before, along with feeling somewhat more, even if a tiny bit, more honest with his feelings and easier to approach than before.

Despite being a serious, no-nonsense, grumpy guy, he's prone to occasionally quip and snark at anyone at their own expense especially if they get on his nerves (see his interactions with Kamui, not even the Commandant is spared from this!). He's also not as cold and distant as he may come across, given that, early on, he quite literally jumps in front of Liv to take a hit that was meant for her with absolutely no hesitation whatsoever, he's almost always the first person to make comments on the Commandant's state as well as express his undiluted feelings (though not without hiding it on occasion behind anger/annoyance, thus making it a case of "anger born from worry").

You can also easily tell if you pay close enough attention to his dialogue and actions that he's not good with expressing his true feelings even to the people he cares about (thankfully Murray, Skk, Lucia, Liv, Kamui, etc. can usually pick up on what he really wants to say), is the type to often be misunderstood due to him being the kind of person who believes in "actions speak louder than words", that he's used to taking care of others instead of prioritizing himself even to his own detriment; while making it clear that he prefers to think and act in a logical and practical manner, he's not exempt to having emotions/feelings, as such, he can be pretty empathetic towards other people even if he doesn't look like it (he's even the first one in the Gray Raven squad to point out WHY EXACTLY the people they come across in Echo Aria refuse to leave their homes even with high risk of the Red Tide washing everything away, and fully understanding as well as getting it).

Alrighty I'm gonna cut that segment short now before this becomes too long for anyone to read through, ehe~!

4) What made you think of designing PGR OCs, instead of making yourself into a self-insert?

.... Actually, truth be told, both of my Skks are, in some way, self-inserts~. It's just that they start out as one before eventually developing into their own characters with only hints/traces of their self-insert origin. Though my Construct OCs are definitely not self-inserts, that much I can certainly say so!

I made them mainly because I really enjoyed the official cast so much I wanted to make characters that would get to interact with them somehow, though I take great care in making sure they aren't TOO out of character with how they're canonically portrayed.

5) What's your thought process behind creating your OCs?

Honestly, it usually starts of something like this--

"lol wouldn't it be funny if I made this type of character? Oooh, what if they interacted with this character? Or this character? Or that character? Let's see, what's missing... Backstory and profile, check. Appearance, I'll sketch one in a bit. Hmmm... I know! *drowns the OC in mountains load of angst*"

6) What's your favorite chapter from the main story?

If I'm limited to talking only about the main chapters currently released on Global then it would have to be Fallen Star, mainly because it's Watanabe's time to shine~. (*´∀｀*)

However, if we were to look at the overall chapters, then, I would have to say Imprisoned Sight.

7) What do you think of the new Liv shown in the latest stream? Where do you think the story is going with her? What do you think happened to Gray Raven?

With Liv, I have a really bad and somber feeling about what Kuro Game has in store for her, given how she looks almost complete different than what she's looked so far, as well as the vibe her new look gives off.

Fuck, I wouldn't be surprised if they decided to thanos snap her memories away as well like they did with Lucia, or worse, infect her with the Punishing and turn her into an actual enemy (for a while before we get her back).

As for Gray Raven, considering what happened at the end of Evernight Beat, wherein the Skk is in a fucking coma with a chunk of the Mother Structure lodged in their abdomen, while Lee and Lucia are in repairs along with Liv, and, if I recall correctly, the Merciful One managed to reach Babylonia and is now onboard the space station as well-- I have a feeling that the despairing Liv will be approached by her and be given a new frame.

8) Have you seen the animated shorts? What do you think of them?

If you're talking about the Panini anime then yes, I've watched them already! Still ripping my insides open from laughter everytime I watch them lol. Favorite episode has got to be the toilet episode, next to that would be the episode where Chrome takes Kamui to Karenina and Liv for training.

9) So do Constructs eat or not? (I'm really confused, especially since I saw Karenina sipping a drink in one of the shorts)

Oh they most certainly can! Fuck, it's even explicitly stated that Camu likes to eat and sample foods whenever he can (revealed in his secrets, as well as his affection stories).

As Camu explains, while they don't get nutrients from human food, they most certainly can still enjoy them and use them as a type of fuel.

10) Do you think Kamui and/or Camu will be a really pivotal plot device at some point, considering how the information on Kamui is so top secret?

Hmmmm.... unless the story at that point is revolving around Kurono Ops and how shady they're being, then personally speaking, the chances are slim.

11) Do you think, at any point, any of the Gray Ravens will die off?

Naaaaaah. They won't do that. Sure, they TECHNICALLY killed off Lucia, but she's still "alive" in a sense, so it both counts and doesn't count.

Besides, sometimes death isn't the worse thing you can inflict on someone/a character~.

12) Who is your least favorite Construct, and why?

I don't really hate/dislike any of the Constructs if I'm being honest. Though I hate how shitty of a unit Sophia is, and that it's kinda pitiful that she's become even more useless now that the new S-Liv is here; but I am in no way saying you should stop using her, keep using Sophia if you really like her! It's your choice after all, and I'm not about to contest you on that part, after all, everyone's enjoyment is subjective.

13) What part of PGR's lore really holds your attention?

The part of the lore that really holds my attention are the characters, and seeing how they react and act to the situations happening to and around them, especially concerning the Punishing and forces out of their control~.

#punishing gray raven #pgr #战双帕弥什 #戰雙帕彌什 #パニシング #パニシンググレイレイヴン #mun speaks #mun yasu #mun ramblings #ask game #ask #ask box #ask box open

[blog-reflection]

ONE / NINE - Basically I Was a Cloud

Today was one the best days I had since what feels like an eternity. 

Mildret has been gone for four days now and I couldn’t be happier. I don’t know where she is nor how she is and to be honest, I also don’t care. First she is old enough to survive on her own. Second she was the one leaving and third, if she’d be dead by now, the police would’ve called me already, so for now everything and everyone is just fine as they are. 

On the more awesome side, I can finally do what I want. Wear whatever I want. Listen to music as loud as I want and best of all, sleep when I want to without someone always bashing in on me for no reason at all. Today I slept in till  four pm, which was okay, considering the fact that I went to bed at around five in the morning. I was up all night gaming with Jesse and I can tell you, we had a blast. I finally got to wear the jumper they gifted me for my last birthday. It was a pink, cropped jumper. Pretty tight on the sleeve and edge with a lot of volume. Basically I was a cloud. I like it alot, especially because even though it’s a cropped jumper, Jesse made sure it was at least covering up till my belly button. It matched really well with my white Calvin Klein and tennis socks so that was nice too. I also did some of the necessary work. I managed to have every student ready for setup. The only thing, obviously, that isn't working as it should, were the access chips for the  library in Royal Holloway. But even that has some news on the horizon. About a week ago, their team sent me an e-mail, explaining why there is such a massive delay with my ticket. They said they will provide me with further instructions via post and that I should keep a look out for any incoming envelopes. On top of all, I also made some small progress with my Italien studies. After I told Lucia what happend at home, she actually decided to come around. She called it emotional support, I call it friend time. We both had so much fun. When she arrived, we started talking about what happened, trying to figure out the reason behind it. Of course, we came to no solution, so we just gave up. We then moved over to some teaching. She brought back the recent test I took and explained to me my errors, as well as giving me more input on what I did wrong, how I did it wrong and how my brain is clingy to the English structure. After the lesson was over, we decided to play some games on our massive TV in the living room. I grabbed my Switch from my room and set it up to the TV. For instance, I do have a TV in my room but the TV in the living room is almost double in size. While I did the setup Lucia opened the wine she bought for us to celebrate the loss of Mildret. I booted up the Mario party and we gamed and gabled for a long time. We then decided to call it a shot after two rounds, since both of us won one round and we wanted to not have a winning person. Both of us were already tipsy so we decided to sleep for a bit before  Lucia was getting back to her room at Royal Holloway. She texted me this morning that she was already home, since something came up. I woke up around midnight so I lowkey wondered where she went. After that I cleaned a bit and then, as already mentioned, played games with Jesse till I fell asleep. 

But what about today? Today was also nice. As already said, I got up at four pm and then just started cleaning my room. Since I don’t do much in it I managed to keep everything clean. I opened my wardrobe and browsed through all the clothes Mildret wouldn’t let me wear. Let’s see. There is a Christmas Jumper Thea got me which is just hilarious. It had bells on it so every step you took, my boobs jiggled. Next are 3 oversized Jumpers. Mildret said they were too colourful and looked like a sack of beans on me. She never really got behind the fact that a lot of people enjoy oversized clothes. There is also a shirt of mine which I cropped myself pretty badly and some more cropped jumpers. I can also spy some fishnet clothes which I adore as well as two bodysuits. One of them was black, but see-through with a lot of gems on it. The other one was a really small mesh. The more I dug the deeper I got. There are so many clothes I haven’t worn. Clothes I loved, clothes that inspired me, clothes that made my day. But also Clothes I simply have forgotten ever existed. I wore the same combination of clothes for almost ten years. I only got so much variety, since all my friends bought me new items like the gem bodysuit I got from Lucia. I I’v been sitting in front of my wardrobe for quite a while, promising myself that one day I will wear those clothes!

Other than that nothing happened today. I made my usual meal which consisted either of broccoli and chicken or pancakes. I know how to cook. I am just way too lazy. I also got some stuff in the freezer like asian dumplings, some pizza Lucia brought me from Italy and so on. Today I decided on broccoli and started preparing everything I needed for it. While that was doing just fine on its own, I scrolled through tiktok not being able to focus on anything. I eventually finished getting my meal together and went upstairs, jumped into my bed and placed the bowl beside it. I booted up my laptop and decided to play a bit of  Cult of the Lamb. Three hours in and I noticed that I got really tired. I took off my clothes and waddled into the kitchen. I haven’t turned on the lights so I lowkey bumped into every single corner in our kitchen. I haven’t turned on the light simply because I didn’t want to. I washed the bowl as well as the pots and went upstairs into the bath to take a shower. Luckily the construction side is over since Mildret left so I can enjoy a nice shower in the evening. I rubbed myself with some lavender smelling shit which made me tired pretty fast. I stepped outside the shower, and walked into my room collapsing on my bed. I quickly turned around when I noticed that my cheeks were pressed against the cold window. I wrapped myself in the blanked better and just rolled over. I mumbled something in front of me which was enough for my echo to understand it. I tuned in to the latest episode of my favourite podcast. I listened for a view minutes before I fell asleep.

I wonder what tomorrow holds

#cloud #bodysuit #cropped #blog.reflection

[barbasbodaciousbeard]

Delete the Twitter app, Mr. Barba

In which Rafael Barba deletes the Twitter app because of the Householder case, and Carmen babysits him. 

Accidental Feminist Icon

The last thing on Rafael Barba’s mind when he was in the hospital room with Maggie Householder was his online reputation. Once he’d turned himself in and been released on his own recognizance, however, he opened his phone to call mami and instead saw hundreds of Twitter notifications, emails from people whose names he didn’t recognize, and missed calls and voicemails from unfamiliar numbers. He didn’t touch Twitter, texting Carmen to ask how bad it was and she advised him to delete the application until at least after the trial. When he went home, mami was there and just as disappointed as he expected. There were tears the minute she saw him, but not any offered comfort. 

“You murdered a child, mijo.”

“You don’t understand, mami. No lo viste. El no estaba realmente vivo.”

“Esa fue la decisión de Dios. No es tu decisión. Tu abuela estaría tan decepcionada de ti.”

“No estoy de acuerdo. Si estás aquí para regañarme, vete a casa.”

“Te llevo a la confesión.”

“Vete a casa, mami. Me confesaré cuando esté lista.”

“Rafa-”

“Go home.”

Lucia stormed out, and Rafael went inside his apartment and went straight for the scotch he kept aside. It wasn’t his good scotch. It was the cheap one that burned his throat and left him sicker than he ever was the next day. Before twisting off the cap, he heeded Carmen’s advice, deleting the Twitter app as he dropped to the couch and began to drink. It was only eleven, not even noon, but he didn’t want to remember what had transpired the day before. He should wade through his email, but someone had posted it. He knew because it was referenced time and time again that they’d found his personal email via some Twitter thread or Subreddit or something else he hadn’t yet encountered. He’d had to mute his phone as phone calls rolled in; the only one he answered confirmed it was strangers from the Internet who had seen the news. Carmen called it getting cancelled when it happened to other people. That usually didn’t involve the loss of a life, so the term seemed not quite right for what was happening, especially given the fact this included more than just the people he was used to. People who had never encountered him were hearing about him in the news. 

He ignored Olivia’s calls, considering the morning’s interactions enough. As he drank, Rafael was able to filter unknown numbers and messages, tossing the phone aside and quickly finishing the bottle. Olivia came by, and he didn’t answer, choosing to lay back on the couch as the room spun around him. Carmen texted him, and he didn’t look. An hour later, he heard her outside of his door with Olivia and unlocking he apartment for her. He’d given her a key long ago so she could get files or suits or drop off leftovers. Both of them came in, and it suddenly dawned on him that he had his suspenders down and shirt open over his undershirt. He’d spilled the most recent tumbler over himself with the pizza he’d ordered. And now, they could see him like this, eyes rimmed red and mood unstable as he thought more than he could about himself. 

“Mr. Barba,” Carmen said softly, kneeling by him. Olivia stayed closer to the door, surveying the room. By the nature of their constant proximity, Carmen had seen the tail end or starts of Rafael getting frustrated, though he always pressed it down with a glass of scotch and good meal. That said, she’d found him too drunk after a trial didn’t go his way. Seen him frustrated as he went through a case he may not be able to do anything about it. Caught him yelling at paperwork as though something would happen. She’d also seen him the next mornings when he came in pretending not to be insanely hungover and was wearing the suit from his office.

“I’m fine.”

“No you aren’t. Is this what happens between an eight o’clock bourbon and the office suit?”

“Shut up, Carmen.”

“Don’t talk to me like that. I’m helping you.”

“Sorry,” he said with a huff as his hand ran down his face, and Olivia had to stifle a laugh at how properly embarrassed he looked. “My email and phone are bad. How bad is Twitter?”

“Medium. A lot of people understand. Or they feel that they can’t understand, so they’ll watch the story.”

“People understand murder?” he scoffed.

“No. No one does. But we all understand how impossible your choice was. How badly the parents were hurting.”

“I was too selfish to do it for my dad.”

“I know, Mr. Barba. But people want to know how long until they hear more. Want people to wait. Can see why you did it. It’ll blow over. We can change your number and your email. Twitter has a really handy button. Block.”

“My name’s Rafael.”

“You’re my boss.”

“Not for long,” he chuckled bitterly before his gaze softened. “All I wanted was for people not to hurt.”

“You need to go to bed, Rafa.” It was Olivia now, and his eyes suddenly snapped open. It was different when it was Olivia. They were friends, but they kept things to work. Other than the occasional group event, they’d grab dinner after work. She didn’t hear him debate pocket squares or see him drunk alone in his office or help him think of replies on Twitter. He’d probably lose his friendship with Carmen once he wasn’t in the office, he supposed. She humored her boss a lot more than she probably should.

“I’m fine, Liv.” It came with more of a snort than he liked, and he was suddenly pulling himself up to sit, wrapping his shirt around himself as though it were a cardigan. Carmen watched he was steady, and Olivia was sure she now knew what she’d looked like when Noah was learning to walk on his own with her hand on his back to keep him upright. Once things passed, she wanted to ask if Rafael was always this willing to be relaxed around Carmen, but she wasn’t sure she really wanted to know.

“I don’t think I’m helping things,” Olivia said softly, and Carmen gave a gentle nod.

“My son’s with my mom for a visit. I’ll take care of him.”

“You’re sure? I can call Lucia.”

“I’m fine, lieutenant. And mami has already been here.”

“Make sure he meets with an attorney tomorrow.”

“I make his calendar. I know.”

“You two can stop talking about me like I’m not here,” he grumbled, heels pressed against his eyes. “I’m drunk, not deaf.”

“You’re belligerent, counsellor.”

“Call me Rafael,” he said again, flopping onto the couch when Olivia had left again.

“I thought Lieutenant Benson was your best friend, Rafael.”

“She is, I guess. Is that sad? My best friend used to be Alex, but I pursued that case. As if mami needed more reason to hate me.” 

“You don’t act like you in front of her. Not all the way.”

“This isn’t me.”

“It’s you without a carefully constructed persona.”

“If that’s the case, I suppose you’re my best friend, Miss Frye.” She’d expected to see a bemused smirk or annoyed scowl, but Carmen was taken aback by how sincere he looked as his hand moved to rest on her forearm and squeeze as well as he could.

“My name’s Carmen,” she teased. “Now come on. You need to go to bed.”

“My suit will get wrinkled.”

“I’ll hang it for you.”

“You can sleep in the guest room. It’s not safe for you to go-” His eyes were suddenly wide. “Carmen, where’s Ollie?”

“With my mom. I told her you needed me for a couple days.”

“You don’t need to disrupt your life.”

“I’ll tell you a secret Mist- Rafael.”

“What?” he asked, flopping into bed where she’d pulled the blanket down once he managed to strip to his boxers.

“You’re my best friend too.” She tugged the blanket over him, pressing a gentle kiss to his temple. He smiled up at her, and she made her way out turning off the lights. It seemed silly to say it to someone like him, but they’d worked together a long time, had a lot of late night talks. She liked him more than a lot of people she knew, and saw him more than anyone outside of her family. 

Carefully, she cleaned his living room, dumping his other bottle of cheap scotch out and disposing of both before setting up the coffee to brew at seven, just in time to have him at an attorney’s office by nine. McCoy had approved her to work from wherever she needed to in order to keep Rafael functioning. She’d have been miserable helping Peter Stone with this trial anyway. They both knew about his father, and it seemed he may be a ticking time bomb. She logged into his twitter, going on a blocking spree as she explored his mentions, tweeting from her own account and his that she’d done it and retweeting it from his account. 

She also liked all the kind ones. The ones asking for understanding or expressing empathy. The ones that acknowledged he had an impossible choice and neither one would have sat well with their own conscious. Leave a child and his family to suffer without end or expedite the inevitable. Then there were his direct messages. Since getting verified, he had the ability to only see messages from people he followed. As she combed through, there were a couple of hateful messages she ignored, but most who knew him expressed understanding and a couple even included leads if he wanted out of the city. She marked those down in her notes app before falling asleep in the guest bedroom. 

The sound that greeted her in the morning was Rafael Barba vomiting as the coffee machine roared to life in the background. Silently, she ordered ginger tea and vitamin b12 for delivery, going to fetch the pedialyte she’d brought from home. When he came out, hair wet from a shower, she’d already brewed him tea, cooked breakfast, and given him an expectant look as she slid a glass of unnaturally purple electrolytes to him. He didn’t know what to say, so he took the proffered glas and took a long sip before wincing.

“Grape,” she said plainly.

“Grapes don’t taste like that.”

“Ollie likes it okay. I make him popsicles though.”

“He’s old enough for popsicles? Isn’t he still on milk?”

“Rafael, he’s two. He drinks milk, but he even eats.”

“Does he like books yet?”

“He does. He really likes being read to.”

“I’ll read to him next time I see him.” He was quiet for a moment, and when he spoke again, his voice was thick. “Do you play him music?”

“Some. Usually my playlists.”

“Play him Bach.”

“You’ll have to tell me what’s best to play him.”

“I’ll send you a playlist.” 

“Why Bach?” She watched as his jaw shifted from side to side, lips pressed together, and that told her all she needed to know. “Drew liked Bach?”

“He’d never know if he liked Bach. Maggie was playing one of his cantatas.”

“Maybe we can take him to an orchestra one day.”

“There are some shows. Kid friendly.”

“He’d like that.”

“I’ll send it to you.”

“You’ll come, won’t you?”

“Me?”

“It’s your idea.”

“You’d still let me around your son?”

“My son is a healthy vibrant boy. If he was in the same situation as Drew, it would be hard, but I’d still want you there. You did exactly what I would have done for him, okay?”

“Did you mean what you said last night?”

“Which part?”

“The last part.”

“You probably are my best friend. And that hasn’t changed. I wish you didn’t have to be put in the situation, but I would hope I’d have been strong enough to do the same. And other people agree with me.”

“God, you’re not actually looking at Twitter.”

“I looked at Twitter. I blocked anyone vitriolic. But, I collected all the kind ones in your favorites for when you’re ready. A lot of your attorney friends have job leads for you if you leave the DA’s office.”

“I’m leaving. And I’m probably going to fucking prison. You’ll be down a friend in a few months.”

“Stop it.”

“They’ll end me in there, Carmen. I sent some of them there.” She wasn’t sure what to make at how at peace with the prospect he was.

“And you won’t go to prison. Don’t focus on that. Even if you do, they’ll have to do something to protect you. And I’ll come visit you.”

“You barely know me.”

“We spend more time together than I do with anyone else. I know you’re good, you have a good heart, you send birthday presents to every SVU detective’s kid and think I don’t know you send them coffee gift cards on their birthdays. You’re a total mama’s boy and despite what a snarky prick you are, you have imposter syndrome out the ass. You’re lapsed enough Catholic not to go to church, but you pray when things are really bad. I also know some part of your brain feels like you’ve let down people who think you do good work by this one thing, but one bad doesn’t outweigh an exorbitant amount of good. I hope Ollie has half of the ethical backbone you do. I know there have been occasions in the past you weren’t perfect, but the man I’ve known deserves every ounce of credit he gets. That doesn’t mean you’ve never made a mistake.”

“You’re ridiculous,” he muttered, and much to his chagrin, Carmen wrapped him in a hug that he returned, refusing to look at her. He was suddenly aware he’d cry if he looked at what he knew was a genuine smile. “I’ve got to get dressed to see an attorney.”

“Who are you going with?”

“Randy Dworkin.”

“He’ll be good.”

“I hate to admit that. And I’m sure I’ll hate every second with him.”

“How about you teach me about Bach this afternoon?”

“You have work.”

“McCoy approved me to be remote.”

“So you’re my sitter?” She could almost swear a smile pulled at the corner of his lip, and she felt pride she didn’t expect.

“I suppose. So Bach?”

“Bring Ollie?”

“Deal.”

#rafael barba #rafael barba x reader #law and order #law and order svu #law and order special victims unit #Rafael Barba x Carmen

[bcbdrums]

Melon Misfortunes

A/N: A little foray back into the world of watermelon... Thanks to @split-n-splice for some clever lines and the great title.

Happy birthday, @jennaanneg!

Read on:  FFn     AO3

---------------------------

Drakken rubbed the back of his neck and straightened up in front of the watermelon crate at the grocer's. He had been bending over the sea of green, bulbous fruit for at least ten minutes, trying to find the very best ones. After the long day, he was finally feeling the exhaustion and pain in his spine.

Drakken glanced to his right to be sure the empty cart was still there, and then turned back to the melons.

"Hello, Drew."

"Gah!"

Drakken recoiled, banging his forearm on the metal cart at the sound of his former college friend's voice and nearly losing his balance as his recovery from that had him bumping into the crate.

"Just as light on your feet as you were in college, I see."

Drakken straightened up and adjusted his shirt, taking in the single quirked eyebrow of James Possible with loathing.

"Just as rude as you always were, I see," Drakken retorted as he gave the man a once-over with wariness and frustration.

Possible was exactly the same as he remembered him from college, except for some wrinkles, gray hair, and extra padding around the waist, all such as comes naturally with age. Drakken bit the inside of his cheek knowing he had aged at least the same, if not worse for his other problems and stresses on his life.

The man didn't seem one bit perturbed by his insult, and to Drakken's dismay he leaned up against the side of the watermelon crate and continued what he apparently thought was a welcome conversation.

"We haven't heard anything about you really since the invasion."

Drakken rolled his eyes and looked back to the watermelons, hoping the man would take the hint and leave. Unfortunately, Possible continued.

"Although my Kimmy-cub did mention running into you at this very store once, after stopping some crooks with Ronald."

Drakken's frown deepened as he considered that in all the stores in all the world, Kim Possible just had to have been busting some small-time criminal while he was buying watermelon. But his brow suddenly rose in the realization that there was no real reason for James Possible to be there.

"You know, she mentioned something about watermelon that time too... You branching out from flowers into mutant fruit, now?" Possible asked with an amused chuckle.

"None of your business," Drakken replied through a grunt, bending low over the melons to get Possible out of his line of sight.

A blessed silence fell for several seconds that made him hope the man had taken the hint and left, but then...

"Finally left the blue lab coat behind, I see."

"Don't you have someplace else to be?" Drakken snapped, feeling another twinge in his neck as he turned too quickly to give his former friend a venomous look.

Possible chuckled. "My wife and I are on a couple's cruise. St. Lucia is one of the stops," the man explained.

Drakken grumbled under his breath about the unfortunate reality of living so near various tourist locations. Perhaps it was time to consider online shopping for groceries...

"Getting a few grays there, Drew."

"Oh like you're one to talk," Drakken said, grabbing the closest watermelon and hefting it into the cart.

As Drakken's irritation rose he wondered if Shego would settle for watermelon-flavored gum. He could grab some off the rack near the check stand and run, and no one would be the wiser.

"All this time and you're getting that one?" Possible said with a concerned frown.

Drakken hesitated, narrowing his eyes on the man.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, those oblong ones aren't very sweet. They were over-watered."

Drakken blinked again, a myriad of new annoying thoughts running through his mind. He moved to set the melon in the cart, but Possible was giving him an all-too familiar, knowing and painfully smug grin.

Drakken frowned.

"Fine, which melons should I buy?" he asked through a scowl, shifting his weight as somehow holding the large melon was putting undue pressure on his spine.

"Well, what are you using them for?" Possible asked, raising that single annoying eyebrow higher as his smirk grew.

"For eating, you— Ngh!"

Drakken cut himself off as he nearly dropped the slippery melon. He grit his teeth as he carefully placed it back in the bin, not making eye contact with Possible who was surely grinning in his perceived pompous superiority that had only added to Drakken's disdain for the man.

"Fine! Which one should I get, then?" Drakken asked as he straightened again, crossing his arms.

His brow rose in curiosity as James Possible's face adopted a thoughtful, critical expression as he bent over the crate.

"For starters, you need something uniform in size and shape. That's how you know it developed properly," the man said. Drakken watched as Possible started sorting the watermelons before he continued. "And if it's dark and dull, you know it's ripe. Avoid the pale and shiny ones."

"Don't you have something better to do on your...so-called couple's cruise?"

"My wife is clothes shopping," Possible stated simply and with a slight cringe as he lifted a melon and examined it.

Despite himself, after nearly a minute of watching Possible sorting watermelons Drakken joined in, moving only the large oblong ones as he didn't know much else. He abhorred the idea of getting advice from the man who was partially responsible for his becoming a villain... But, if it meant getting the best melons for Shego...

"And there, those ones will be very flavorful," Possible said, pointing to a melon with a massive orange discoloration on it.

"It looks like it spent too much time in the sun," Drakken said skeptically.

"It spent a long time ripening on the vine," Possible explained, as if the topic were an everyday one. "But avoid the white spots. And here," he gestured to the ugliest of melons, covered in brown scars that spread over the rind in a webbed appearance that interrupted the green stripes, "is another sign that they're sweet and flavorful."

Drakken leaned away again and frowned. "Do you take me for a fool?"

Possible straightened as well, looking ever-confident. "The brown spots indicate numerous pollination attempts by bees, thus the melon is sweeter."

Drakken stared the man down for several seconds and detected no lie in his words. His brow furrowed.

"How do you know this?"

"I've done some research into various botanical fields."

"You're a rocket scientist. Unless something has changed in the past—" Drakken stopped as realization struck. His brow rose, and suddenly Possible looked uncomfortable. "Are you...trying to move in on my research?"

Possible cleared his throat. "Anyway, those are the tastiest melons...if eating is in fact what you need them for."

"You're trying to move in on my territory! You're...you're jealous!"

Possible turned on his heel and departed rapidly with a stiff wave.

"Pleasure catching up!"

Drakken stared in astonishment until the man vanished through the automatic doors of the store, and then a grin slowly broadened his face. James Possible was jealous...of him!

"About time," Drakken muttered as he turned back to the melons. His grin quickly faded into uncertainty.

What if Possible had been lying about the melons?

He tried to recall in the past which ones had tasted the best. Not that he ate much of them, but he had sampled more than his fair share.

It was true, the enormous long ones never held much flavor and seemed watery. Perhaps it was true that the ugliest were the best? He had never bought those before, so...he supposed it was worth a try.

Drakken shrugged to himself and started loading up the shopping cart. Possible had no idea after all what the melons were really for. There would be no reason for the man to lie...except malice. And yet...something told Drakken, that that hadn't been the man's motive...much to Drakken's confusion.

Shego was still in bed when Drakken returned to the lair with the watermelons, and he had checked on her while the henchmen unloaded them from the hover-car. She wasn't feeling as ill that day, but still didn't want to get up. Thankfully, the promise of watermelon seemed to calm her ire, so it was only with limited anxiety that Drakken portioned up one of the hideous looking melons and prepared her a simple bowl to start with.

The flesh of the watermelon itself did indeed look redder and was definitely juicier than what he was used to buying, but even if he thought it was good—which he wouldn't, having lost his taste for the fruit—it was Shego's opinion that mattered. And so he held his breath as he walked back to the bedroom to present the bowl to his wife.

Shego sat up slowly in bed and Drakken's brow twisted in sympathy at her grimace of pain. Once the bowl was in her hands he tossed off his polo shirt and pushed his feet out of his shoes, grateful to be home where he could shake off the displeasure of interacting with James Possible and focus on the important things. Namely, his wife and their unborn child.

Shego had one hand on the small swell of her belly as she adjusted pillows with the other so she could lean against the headboard while she ate. Drakken quickly moved to her side to assist her which earned him a look of annoyance, as if he should have already been helping her, but also a look of gratitude.

Drakken sat on the bed and un-tucked his tank top as Shego tossed the blankets down to her knees and then brought the dish of watermelon up to chest height with one palm supporting the bowl from beneath as she stabbed one of the succulent cubes with her fork. He held his breath again as she brought the bite to her lips, and after only a moment of chewing her eyes widened.

"Where did you get this?" she asked, the bite going into her cheek as she spoke. She put another cube in her mouth as she continued chewing the first.

"Sanchez's place, like always," he said with a slightly nervous shrug.

"Better than any he's ever had before," she commented through her full mouth.

Drakken watched as her eyes brightened through the enjoyment of her biggest pregnancy craving. He felt the irritation of the shopping trip melt away at the pleased look on her face, and he hoped the treat would also go some way toward easing the pain of the never-ending morning sickness.

He got his answer very suddenly when Shego set the bowl down, grinning at him as she pushed the bed-covers even farther away. He didn't even get to speak before he was knocked back slightly by her arms wrapping around him and her lips pressing against his. He responded with a startled hum as he caught himself from falling with one palm on the mattress, his other hand instantly finding her waist.

Shego pulled away just enough so she could smile into his eyes, and Drakken blinked at her dumbly in confusion as she shifted nearer, her pregnant belly pressing against his.

"Thanks, Dr. D.," she said simply, and kissed him again, the distinct flavor of watermelon on her lips.

For once, it was very, very sweet.

#drakgo #dragko #drakken #shego #drakken x shego #drakkenxshego #kim possible #fanfiction #fanfic #fic #drakken shego #drakken/shego #drakkenandshego #drakken and shego #dr drakken #kp #dr. drakken #kp drakken #kp dr drakken #kp dr. drakken #shegoanddrakken #shego and drakken #shegoxdrakken #shego x drakken

[just-some-fiction]

Just You And Me Part 8

Hello! Here's another oneshot from my Rio centred series. There's 27 chapters up so far on AO3. Check it out. I take requests as well.

"You know what I can't do," he looked her dead in the eye, "I can't do five to fifteen in FCI Milan cos some bitches need their pocket money."

Walking into the apartment he was reminded why he couldn't do time in a federal prison. The first reminder came in the form of Marcus running towards him, holding a toy. Rio smiled as he picked up his kid, walking further into the house. The five year old went at full speed, recounting his day. 

Needing to put his gun away and not really keen to expose his son to that, he set him down, "Just gotta get outta my work clothes aight pop," the little boy nodded and went back to playing in the lounge. As he walked back towards the lounge after putting his things away, Lucia's voice rang through the home. 

"Baby," he stopped in his tracks, turning towards his wife's voice coming from the kitchen, "that you?" 

Moving towards the kitchen he leaned against the doorway. In front of him was the second reminder. Lucia was wearing an oversized sweater, her hair piled on top of her head, stirring a pot of what looked like hot chocolate. He took in the sight in front of him, licking his bottom lip before moving towards her. He loved her like this, laid back and relaxed, wearing his clothes. 

"Hey," she smiled, still focused on the milk concoction that was bubbling away on the stove. 

Standing behind her, he ran his hands along her thighs, before giving her behind a swat, causing her to gasp in surprise. Without warning he reached in front and plunged a hand down her panties. 

"Rio!" she laughed, "Marcus could walk in here," but her husband ignored her, trailing kisses down her neck, "Christopher Ramirez," she scolded. 

"You sound so sexy when you say my name," he growled into her ear, cupping her as she leaned back against him, “fuck baby,” he groaned, sliping a finger into her, “wouldn’t be able to do five to fifteen knowing you on the outside.” 

“What?” Lucia pulled away slightly, “What happened?” she managed to turn around, removing his hand as she did so. 

“Nothing baby,” pulling her closer, “just explained to that housewife I ain’t gonna risk going to jail cos she and her clique want pocket money.” 

She nodded, taking the hot chocolate off the stove, "Want some?" 

"Please," he got three cups out.

They made their way to the lounge where Marcus was playing with his toys. The little boy took one of the cups of hot chocolate and went back to his toys. Lucia settled on the couch, picking up the throw that she discarded when she went to the kitchen and threw it over her legs and went back to reading her book. 

Rio plopped down on the floor, learning against the couch, "So what you do today pop?" sipping on his hot chocolate, reminder number three, his wife's hot chocolate. His son gave him a recount of his day and they played until bedtime. 

Once Marcus was tucked in and snoring away, Rio walked back into the lounge where Lucia was still sitting. He stared at his wife, his eyes trailing over her, no way would he survive looking at her from behind a glass screen. Walking over to her, he knelt down beside the couch, hand disappearing under the blanket, shoving it off and pushing the t shirt up. 

"Papi what has gotten into you," Lucia laughed as he settled between her legs, pulling her panty to the side and licking a line along her opening, "baby," she sighed, one hand coming to rest on his head, "yes," she mewled. Reminder number four, the sounds his wife made as he ate her out. 

Not wanting any interruptions or risking their son finding them, he pulled her up and carried her to the bedroom. Kicking the door shut he sat them on the bed, by now he tugged off Lucia's top, placing open mouthed kisses along her torso. 

Pulling away, she unbuttoned his shirt, tugging it down his shoulders and ran her hands over the bare skin. His jeans and boxers and her panties followed, leaving the pajr nude. Lucia moaned as she nudged against his erection, looking down at it, standing to attention. Licking her lips she looked at him, kissing him deeply before kneeling in front of him. 

Spitting in her hand she ran it along his shaft, before wrapping her lips around the head, sucking ever so lightly. Lucia looked at him as she sucked, taking him all the way in, slightly gagging as he hit the back of her throat. She kept him there, feeling his trimmed pubic hair tickling her nose, until she couldn't any longer and pulled away. 

"Lucia," Rio moaned, his hand stroking her hair. She sucked on the head, letting her hand pump him, while she created a suction around the tip. Reminder five, the way she sucks him off. He watched as her lips wrapped around him and felt her tongue slide against him as she sucked. The things she does to him, many times without knowing. 

"Never be able to do time," he groaned as she licked him, sucking along the length, “fuck baby,” his hand was pushing down on her head. 

Lucia pulled away, wiping her mouth as she got up and straddled him, kissing him slowly. She loved sucking on his lower lip, biting onto it and running her tongue along it. They locked eyes as she sank down onto him, her core clenching as he stretched her. Sitting like that for a few moments, the couple simply kissed and trailed their hands along each other’s bodies. Slowly she started moving over him, her hands resting on his shoulders for leverage. 

Rio pulled her close, her fingers drawing circles on his chest. Turning her head up at him, she placed kisses along the contours of his tattoo. 

“I love you mami,” he kissed her head. 

“I love you too Rio,” she turned onto her stomach to look at him, “I don’t think I’d be able to deal with you doing five to fifteen either,” her finger trailed along his lips, kissing his cheek, “alone here, only be able to see you for sixty minutes once a month, conjugal visits only after six months of good behaviour,” that made him chuckle. 

“Think ima wait six months for that?” he ran his fingers through her hair, “start a fucking riot,” he kissed her, slipping his tongue into her mouth. 

“Just be careful with this please,” she held onto him, “these women seem like they’d do anything for money,” she sighed, “especially the one who tried to hustle you this morning.” 

He nodded, before turning them around and kissing her neck slowly, holding her hands above her head as he sucked on the exposed skin. Soon he was inside of her again, holding her legs open while he thrust into her slowly, his lips parted as he looked at her, a crease on his forehead. 

“That’s it baby,” he moaned, “you been taking me so good since we were teenagers, the fuck ima give that up,” he growled, “you and me,” he kissed her, Lucia’s hands resting on the nape of his neck, their foreheads touching, as they climaxed. 

She settled against his chest, breathing heavily, her face hidden in his neck. Rio’s hands were in her hair, playing with the strands as she fell asleep. Laying awake, he looked at her, using his other hand to stroke her cheek. This was his reminder each and every night. Whenever he was on the verge of doing something irrational or reckless, he’d think of her and the fact that he couldn’t afford to do time. She shifted slightly in her sleep, throwing a leg over his waist. There were days where he’d be ready to kill someone without thinking it through, then he’d stop and see his wife and son in front of him, reminding him that his actions would not only affect him but everything he has today. 

The next morning he woke up alone in bed, the spot next to him cold. Pulling on a pair of boxers, he made his way out of the bedroom. Lucia was in the kitchen making coffee, while Marcus was eating pancakes. 

Standing behind her, Rio kissed her shoulder, “Morning Lucia,” wrapping his arms around her, pulling her close. 

“Morning Christopher,” she turned her head and kissed him. 

"Morning daddy," Marcus grinned. 

"Morning pop," he kissed his son's forehead. 

"Coffee baby?" 

"Yes please," he kissed Lucia's neck before sitting next to Marcus, "you help mama make pancakes?" the little boy nodded, his mouth stuffed. 

After breakfast Rio got dressed and got ready to head out. Lucia was off for the day so she and Marcus would be spending it together. Before he left, he pulled Lucia in for a kiss, gripping her hips tightly. 

" Love you mami," he smirked at her, licking his lower lip, "see you in a bit aight"

Lucia nodded, wrapping her arms around him and placing a kiss on his cheek, "Love you too baby."

Fuck doing five to fifteen.

#Rio good girls #Manny Montana #Johnny tuturro #Lucia solano #Rio x Lucia #Johnny x Lucia #Good girls NBC #Just some fiction #Graceland