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mactavishsgfandwife · 4 months

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Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley Comforts You

i’m on my period atm and it’s that mental state where you just want to curl up forever and you forget to take care of yourself and i wish i had a big sexy military man to look after me :(

simon comforts a sick reader who’s been struggling to care of herself 💞

not proofread - comfort, angst, alluding to bad mental health but simon is so sweet

Coming home from a week away, working, Simon quietly unlocks the door. His heavy duffel bag weighs him down, and his dark mask and military boots make him seem almost terrifying, the humanity in him hidden behind cloth and eye black - but under his mask, his thin lips smile softly, already imagining how you’re going to greet him… how you’ll be waiting by the door, like you always are, like some sweet puppy waiting for her master to come home. Maybe you’ve baked cookies, or lit candles… maybe you’re asleep in bed, the only thing covering you being the duvet cover… all these thoughts run through his head, and he smiles to himself. God, he’s lucky.

The 4am winter cold slows his movements, but eventually the house key clicks into place, and he’s finally home. He places his kit on the floor, locking the door behind him, and switches on the light…

Only to be met with a messy house. No girlfriend, no cookies, no candles, no wet panties… just some papers, strewn about the floor. A pile of coats on the table, ibuprofen on the kitchen counter and dirty cups littered on the floor around the sofa. He almost doesn’t recognise the flat, but those are your coats by the door, and that’s your childhood teddy on the sofa. The one you only get out when you’re really, really sad.

"Oh… oh, baby," he sighs softly. Ashamedly, he’s a little disappointed, a little annoyed. He risks his ass in the field, so you don’t have to work, provides for you… and this is the welcome he gets? A dirty kitchen? Are you a pig?

But he knows you better than that. He knows you’re his good girl, you wouldn’t disrespect him like that, you want nothing more than to make him happy. He can tell by the medicine and the throat lozenges strewn everywhere, and by the fluffy comfort teddy (not so fluffy after all these years) on the sofa, that something is wrong.

He gently opens the door to your shared bedroom, moving softly and taking care not to disturb you as you slept. The room was similarly disorganised - piles of clothes, random things that needed putting back, endless cups of camomile tea on the side. And in the middle, was his girl. In his tshirt, and an unsexy pair of your comfy underwear, lying curled up into a tense ball under at least 2 blankets. A little tear wobbled on your puffy cheeks as you slept, and there was a little blood stain by your thighs.

Without a word, he removes his mask, taking away that element of separation completely so that it’s just you and him. Not Ghost and his bird, but Simon and his little girl. And his girl needed him. Tenderly, he lifted the covers and slipped into bed at your side, wrapping his strong, sore arms around you and holding you to him. He was tired and aching from training, but he would always have the energy to hold you tight. His rough, wide hands traced up and down your back in small steps and his chapped lips met your soft forehead, as he pulled you close into his chest. His body was like a blanket, shielding you from the world, keeping you cosy with your cheek against his heart, that beat behind his muscles that were so soft, and so warm…

"I’m home, love…" he coos softly into your ear, his typically rough manchester accent sounding unusually tender against your temple as he kissed it.

As his warm arms encircle you, your eyes softly start to flutter open, not quite understanding what is happening.

"Simon…"

"That’s right."

"You’re…" you look away, ashamed, as you remember the house that he had to come home to. As you remember what a bad girlfriend you’ve been.

"I’m sorry," is all you can manage to say as the tears start to fall again. Your boyfriend realises as your arms relax that you had been curled up so tightly around a little teddy… a bear, in a military uniform, that he’d bought you for fun when you were out one day and had seen it in a shop window. That bear had become your comfort when Simon was away.

"Oh, baby…" he whispers, "don’t be sorry, darlin’, m’just glad to see you."

"But the flat’s a mess… i’m a mess…"

"I’ve got it, sweetheart, we’ll get you cleaned up. Don’t worry that pretty head. Love ya too much t’let you worry about anything," he whispers softly, noticing the hot water bottle at your side, "you got cramps..?"

His thumb strokes your hair behind your ear as you nod weakly, appreciatively.

"Mhm…" you whisper, "bad’uns."

"S’alright," he smiles, pulling you face down onto his chest, and placing a firm hand on your lower back as the other holds you tight, "I can be your hot water bottle for the night."

thank you for reading lovelies :)

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betasquadx · 2 months

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Yes it's me. I KNOW I KNOW.

Nia may I ask for your finest Niko smut. We definitely don't sit on his face and he definitely doesn't choke us and call us a good girl (Make it happen I beg)

Now could I have used anon? Maybe, but no. I'm feeling rather courageous (I almost had 5 mental breakdowns)

Love u boo,

Tee

HELP THE END IS SO FR. ( same )

Mental breakdowns either ruin us or give us the confidence we need x

Trust I’m only doing this cause one of my fav writers who is killing it atm who YOU should check out, Tee requested it x ( also because I have thought abt a fic like this b4, don’t ask Ik u have too. )

Lil disclaimer, dk how to feel about this, I’m not the best at writing smut but this is good practice to get better at it so 🎀 I HOPE its good 😭🙏 but if not yk hey I tried luvs x feel free to give me tips in the comments 🫣

Change of plans - Niko Omilana

Summary : Settling down after a party you thought you and Niko were just gonna watch a movie and order some food, but he had.. other ideas.

Warnings : SMUTT

——

Twisting the key in the door, you stepped into the hotel room closely followed by Niko as you locked it just as quick.

The exhaustion from being out all day suddenly hit you like a tidal wave, overwhelming your senses.

“I think I’m gonna take a shower first, what about you?,” You asked.

He removed his suit jacket, draping it over the bed, emptying his pockets. “I'm not sure,” he sighed, visibly tired. “I don't mind taking one after you.”

He smiled gently, approaching you, his hands resting on your waist.

You laughed softly, encircling your arms around his neck while he looked down at you. “That's settled then,” you murmured,

smiling up at him as he leaned in, pressing a tender kiss to your cheek.

With a blush tinting your face, you giggled softly as you stepped back. “Okay I'm gonna get a shower now,”

“Alright,” he responded, scratching the back of his neck,

watching as you headed into the bathroom, closing the door behind you.

You undressed, ensuring the water was warm enough before stepping into the shower.

The chill of the night made you crave warmth, and the shower provided just that.

Showers always helped clear your mind, especially after a long day.

It would’ve been about a half an hour when you stepped out of the shower. Longer than usual but you weren’t in any rush.

Wrapping a towel around yourself, you dried off before changing into your pajamas right there in the bathroom.

Holding a towel to your hair, you gently dried it, humming to yourself quietly.

You entered the bedroom with it still wrapped around your hair, before leaving it on the table,

approaching the bed where he sat, engrossed in his phone until he glanced up at you.

“The shower's free,” you murmured wearily, offering a tired smile as you settled beside him. However, it was the way he eyed you up and down that left you confused, sending shivers down your spine,

and not because it was chilly. “Niko?” you asked, puzzled by his behavior. “Is something wrong?”

With a grin, he set his phone down beside you, his eyes locking onto yours. “No, nothing's wrong, just a bit chilly isn't it?”

he responded, nonchalantly brushing off the moment. You chuckled, nodding in agreement. “Yeah, it's freezing, almost had to use boiling hot water,” you joked.

“Hmm..” he added, pursing his lips thoughtfully. “C’mere”, he motioned, leaving you slightly puzzled. “I'm right beside you,” you furrowed your brows grinning, observing his smile growing. “I know, just..c’mere,” he stated,

his tone more so demanding now than asking.

“Okay..,” you whispered, chuckling softly and complying with his request.

You settled onto his lap, noticing his smile shifting into a smirk as he sat up, making space for you.

His eyes roamed you up and down as he gently reached out his hand, tracing your cheek, earning a little smile from you. “What is it?”

you inquired, noticing a subtle change in his demeanor as he chuckled,

“Nothing..you're just so pretty,” he replied softly, causing you to laugh as he continued to stroke your cheek tenderly. “Hmm? Is that all?” you added, curious about his intentions.

“No,” he replied, leaning in to kiss you, his hands now wrapping around your waist. Smiling into the kiss, you chuckled softly, reciprocating the kiss as your legs instinctively wrapped around his waist.

Grinning at your response, his hand slowly shifted from your waist to your thigh, causing you to momentarily break the kiss and gasp softly in surprise.

He smirked playfully, his touch teasing as his hand ventured into your shorts,

skimming dangerously close to where you yearned for it.

A whimper escaped your lips at his boldness, causing you to shift slightly on his lap, unable to contain your reaction.

He savored the details of your expression, delighting in the pleasure evident on your face,

craving to witness it further. His hand lingered above your core, teasingly granting your unspoken desires. “Oh..” you groaned, hearing his chuckle as he sat up carefully,

his lips trailed towards your ear, softly nibbling on it. “Hmm.. someones eager,” his voice laced with mischief as he slowly added a finger,

hearing you mewl slightly, your eyes squeezing shut in response. “Niko..” you moaned, unable to contain the noises that left your mouth.

Adding a second finger as gradually as the first, he skillfully worked them inside of you, eliciting a deeper moan from you.

Soon, a third and fourth finger joined in, moving with expertise to increase your pleasure.

He proceeded with deliberate slowness and precision, as if looking for something, which he knew he had found when you released a long, drawn-out moan in response to a particular curl of his fingers.

“Please..” you pleaded, your voice dripping with desire, to which he surprisingly complied. His fingers worked overtime, increasing their pace, going faster and faster within you.

Each movement seemed to hit that specific spot, intensifying your need for him with every stroke.

However it was just when you were on the brink of release when he unexpectedly withdrew his fingers, leaving you a moaning mess, quickly letting out soft pleas, begging him to let you even finish.

You opened your eyes upon hearing his chuckle, locking eyes with him as tension surged between you.

“Sit on my face.” The whispered request sent a shiver down your spine, making you moan again just from the sheer dirtiness of his words, delivered in that seductive tone.

Responding immediately to his demand, you sat up, stripping your clothes off eagerly as he assisted in removing your shirt.

His mouth latched onto your breast without hesitation, swirling his tongue around your nipple, causing a loud gasp to escape your lips.

Your hand found its way to his hair, pulling on it slightly as he lifted you on his face,

wasting no time in diving between your folds, his tongue teased your clit with delicate precision. The sensations overwhelmed you, making you feel light-headed as you clung to the headboard for support.

“Oh my god...,” your legs trembling slightly as he glanced up at your face, a chuckle escaping his lips. The sensation diving straight to your core, intensifying the pleasure through your body.

You cried out his name repeatedly, the sound echoing in the room, and as you opened your eyes and gazed down at him,

it came to no surprise when you found him already looking back up at you, the intense eye contact only served to heighten your arousal, causing you to whine even more.

“Can I please, ah...” you began to plead, feeling yourself getting closer to the edge,

cutting off as your legs shook even more, biting your lip in frustration,

but once again, he denied your request, stopping immediately as he sensed you were about to release, leaving you on the brink of ecstasy yet again.

Frustration filled your cries as you called out his name once more. “No, please, Nick..” His hand reached out, cupping your cheeks, forcing you to look down at him.

“I'll let you this time, baby, I promise,” he whispered reassuringly, his grip firm yet gentle as he held onto your waist and with a swift motion, switching your positions, leaving you laying down on the bed against the headboard.

He stepped off the bed, unbuckling his belt and removing his trousers, then unbuttoning his blouse and loosening his tie,

but your gaze couldn’t help but shift down to his crotch, almost moaning at the sight of it.

He opened the drawer, swiftly grabbing a condom before crawling back onto the bed. Helping you sit up, he lined himself up with you, easing in slowly. Both of you groaning in unison as he entered you,

a cry of his name escaping your lips as he hushed you softly, kissing your neck.

“Hmm, your beautiful,” he whispered softly, his movements deliberate as he slid in and out of you, watching as your face contorted in pleasure, just as it had before, enjoying every second of it.

“Niko,” you whispered, wrapping your arms and legs around him, urging him closer as he lifted you slightly, allowing for deeper penetration.

“Faster, please,” you pleaded, feeling his smirk against your neck as he readjusted himself.

And without hesitation, he complied with your request, picking up the pace as he let out a satisfied sigh.

Ripping a profound moan from you, his hand now found its way to your neck, applying gentle pressure.

The combination of his thrusts and the sensation of his hand on your neck made it hard for you to form coherent words.

He maintained a fast and hard pace, driving you towards the brink of ecstasy as the pressure from his hand on your neck intensified.

Your mouth hung open in a silent scream of pleasure, cries of his name and moans escaping your lips uncontrollably as you felt yourself teetering on the edge, seeing stars with each thrust.

But the cherry on top of the intense pleasure was the constant stream of praises and teasing words he whispered in your ear, each one making you more and more aroused as he continued to pound into you relentlessly.

“That's it... you're doing so well.”

“You feel so good.”

“You're so perfect..”

He noticed your response to them, smirking knowingly as he adjusted his hips to hit that particular spot, eliciting a gasp from you as you clung onto him tighter.

“Niko..” you breathed, the sound of your voice uttering his name filling him with pride.

With a confident smile, he slowly increased the pressure on your neck, sending waves of pleasure coursing through your body as your legs trembled under his touch.

“That's it, you're nearly there,” he whispered encouragingly, observing the increase in your breathing as your gasps transformed into soft, rapid breaths.

Sensing your impending release, you arched your back to meet his thrusts, struggling to speak through the overwhelming pleasure as spit occupied your mouth. “Nick, please..”,

you managed to let out, your voice barely a whisper. Chuckling softly, he teased,

“Please what? Use your words.” His playful remark only adding to the anticipation.

“Please, I need to..oh my..” you gasped out, your words trailing off as he smiled, hushing you softly with a gentle kiss to your lips.

His motions on your neck was causing you to feel lightheaded as he lightly adjusted it, the pressure growing slightly overwhelming, eliciting a soft gasp from you.

“Good girl,”

he murmured against your ear, the praise sending a shiver of pleasure straight to your core.

With one final, deliberate angle of his hips, you felt yourself giving in. “I'm gonna...” you gasped, moaning his name as you reached your peak,

releasing as he continued to pound into you. He groaned in response, feeling you tense around him, his thrusts gradually becoming less frequent.

Kissing you one last time, he came inside you, whimpering softly as you felt him fill you up.

For a moment, you both just lay there, and as he moved to pull out, you sighed softly, casting a gaze at him as he settled beside you.

His glance met yours, observing your half-lidded eyes gazing up at him and the gentle rise and fall of your chest, small sighs escaping your half-open mouth.

Snuggling closer to each other, you rested your head on his chest, feeling him stroke your hair soothingly as he peppered your forehead and cheeks with soft kisses, praising you for how well you did.

“I’m gonna run you another shower, kay?” he whispered, pressing a tender kiss to your lips.

“Kay kay,” you whispered back, smiling up at him, half asleep. He chuckled softly before getting out of bed and disappearing into the bathroom,

leaving you to drift off for another twenty ish minutes while he made sure to take care of you.

Perhaps you could have a movie night another time, as tonight had.. escalated quickly, but it was a night neither of you would soon forget.

——

Help this is by far the SMUTTIEST thing I have ever written ever.

Dk how much I like it tbh, feel like I need to cleanse myself after it 😭 be honest as well I need feedback x

Again my smut writing skills isn’t great so sorry if there is repetitive language I genuinely js didn’t know how to word certain stuff, hope you enjoyed it tho x

#beta squad #niko omilana #ndlqz #niko omilana smut #niko omilana x reader

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joekeeryswife · 1 year

Note

u should defo do a fic where r breaks something at steve’s house and she’s apologising and crying and starts panicking & steve just comforts her bc he knows the feeling all too well bc of his dad

ur writing is literally terrific love 💕💕

Picture frame - s.h

hello love, thank you for your request! i hope this is okay, i am not really liking my writing atm. this is really short and i hope that’s okay. feedback is always appreciated and my requests are open- enjoy x (also did i have a mental break down about Steve possibly dying in season 5? yes. a lot of crying has been done)

taglist (feel free to add yourself 🤍):if there is a line through your @ i can’t tag you x @eddieamoremio @johnricharddeacy @theshireisonfire @ssababe @snackycake1975.

it was late and you were tired, so tired that Steve had to put his arm around your waist to keep you up right so you could walk to the door. Steve had taken you on a date which was rare. you were both so busy all the time with working, you both had different schedules and it was hard to figure out a day where you were both free.

luckily this weekend you were both off so a date night was 100% needed. he’d taken you to a restaurant and then to the movies, it was just the cutest date and it suited both of you. you were in Steve’s house more then you were in your own and it was all because of your dad, like Steve, you and your dad didn’t get along.

he was just one of those dads who hated their daughters and loved their sons. you had two older brothers and one younger one and it was like you were the outcast. you got along with your mum though, she was always on your side and stuck up for you when your dad shouted but there wasn’t a lot she could do.

to your dad, anything you did was wrong. he’d shout at you to the point where the neighbours would call the police with a noise complaint because of how loud he was. this is why you loved staying at Steve’s, it was quiet and comforting and you never felt scared being with him.

Steve’s house was dark and you being tired and disorientated you had no idea where Steve was leading you to. Steve knew you were tired. he could tell as soon as you got out of the cinema that the moment your head would hit his pillow you’d be out like a light.

Steve had to go into the kitchen to finish the dishes before his parents came back (which he had absolutely no clue when they would) because the last time they came back unannounced, per usual, he hadn’t cleaned up the house to the ‘family standard’ and was shouted at by both his parents for being too lazy when they went off for different business trips.

he carefully laid you down on the couch and kissed your forehead before he made his way to the kitchen. you didn’t wanna be on the couch, all you wanted to do was be in Steve’s bed with his hoodie and joggers on so you did the only logical thing, got up off of the sofa and started making your way to Steve’s bedroom still half asleep.

the next thing you heard was glass smashing which woke you up out of your sleepy state. you immediately went down to the floor and saw it was a picture of Steve and his parents. the glass on the picture frame had smashed all over the floor and the wooden part had also broken. you instantly felt tears welling up in your eyes.

the last time you had broken something was in your house and you had gotten screamed at for it by your dad. you had absolutely no idea how Steve would react, would he be mad? would he shout at you? so many negative thoughts ran through your mind as you picked up all the big bits of glass and put them in your hand.

Steve heard the smashing and quickly left the dishes to find you on your hands and knees picking up shards of glass with thick tears rolling down your face. Steve could see a little bit of blood on your hand, you’d definitely cut it on the glass. you heard Steve’s footsteps approaching you as you kept picking up the glass but it was difficult with how teary eyed you were.

you looked up and saw Steve towering over you with a confused look on his face. the only thing you knew what to do was apologise and beg for forgiveness. you didn’t want Steve to shout at you but you had broken something of his and surely he was going to be mad. “i’m so sorry Steve. i didn’t even see the picture and i should of been looking and i’ll-”

Steve bent down to your level and lifted his hand to wipe away the tears which were falling down your cheeks quickly. “baby, it’s okay. it’s only a picture frame” he gave you a genuine smile to try and calm you down but it was no use.

your tears were still falling, if Steve wasn’t mad then his parents most definitely would be “but i broke it” Steve had never heard your voice like this. so soft yet so weak. it honestly broke his heart. “by accident. it’s only a picture frame sweetheart. it can be replaced. now, let me see your hands”

he watched as you opened your hands up for him to see and saw some bits of glass in your left hand were covered in blood. he started to pick the glass out of your hands and put them on top of the picture and once all of the glass was out of both of your hands he took your hands into his. “come on, we need to clean you up baby”

you and Steve stood up from the floor and he guided you to the kitchen. Steve started cleaning up your hand and you watched intently as he did so. he was gentle and made sure he didn’t hurt you. “i’m really sorry Steve” he shook his head and lent down to place a quick kiss on your cheek. “stop apologising. it’s honestly fine honey” Steve knew how your dad was and he also knew what it was like for a parent to dislike their kid, he’d lived through it himself.

when he saw you sobbing on the floor like that he knew his only approach should be a soft one. you hadn’t done anything wrong and it didn’t matter. it was a picture frame. Steve always wanted you to feel loved and that’s why he was always so gentle with you when you were upset, he loved you so much and nothing would ever change that, even if you did break another picture frame his feelings would never change.

#fanfiction #imagines #steve harrington #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington blurb #steve harrington fanfic #steve harrington x you #steve harrington one shot #steve harrington fanfiction #steve harrington imagines #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington angst #steve stranger things #stranger things #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington x fem #steve harrington x gender neutral reader #stranger things 4

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anonymous-dentist · 9 months

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GOD I LOVE YOUR AU ok question time

- who is in the federation of heros? What founded the federation? Are they powered like cellbit?

- how is cellbit one of the first few born? I feel theres a science experiment plot caught in this and he broke containment. I wonder if he found this out due to being able to scare himself, and that fear immediately projecting to others, making THEM just as scared. Id imagine hed be diagnosed with severe paranoia/etc and then like. Oh SHIT its not. That. Oh fuck.

- what was that leadup that made him a supervillain? Something so minuscule yet so big as fear, to be considered one of the high villains of the city is insane. Some people would probably laugh it off an say physical destruction was scarier than mental, until they see what he actually does.

- who did he murder?????? I wonder if it was someone who defied the "everyones fears projected back to them" ability. Someone unaffected by this, like maybe their own ability counteracted it. One of the federations lower ranked heros attacked... as a citizen... i feel theres more than meets the eye here..... but of course it ended with murder. I feel there could be done with something of luzu and his look alike there.

- i still keep thinking about breaking dawn and how forever is also considered richas's dad, and just thinking about it being kinda switched in this scenario. Cellbit walked into forevers life again an now richas has another dad to annoy the piss out of. Though i do feel him an jaiden would be at each others throats in investigation. She would totally be a foh member to me. He tries to take down them through HER.

- why jaiden? Shes probably the most visible with her apparent ability. I imagine her having hummingbird like abilities. Flying at such a fast rate it can change the force of wind itself, etc etc etc (running on coffee an headaches atm sorrie) but she KNOWS something. She knows the foh is fucked up. She knows its dictating the definition of right an wrong, but she doesnt have the power (YET!!!!!!) to kill them from the inside out.

- heros who are seen as the light amongst the city, vigilantes who are the underbelly of a growing problem/an antibiotic refusing to kill the infection, and singular villain who wants to put a stop to it for all. God. I am jn love with this au im sorry can u tell

- and then theres fucking SPIDER MAN. nobody knows who he may work for since, by the logic of q city, if your a vigilante, your working for someone else directly related to the foh, and being sponsored as such. But theres no calling for spiderman, theres even active "have you seen this person" signs around the city, marking them as a non verbalized threat to the standing of foh. Cellbits key.

- now he needs to convince his friends to help him find spiderman. For....... research. Yes. Totally. He wishes to interview spiderman in hopes to figure out "who he works for", which not really. Hes not the best at lying, nor was he really trying. He wants to crack down the foh to its rotten core.

- he even tries to ask roier for help at some point, right? He talks about the signs around the city, says its a shame that hes on a watch list- and how he swings around to actively web heros against the walls to stop them from hurting another person.

- and its convinent theyre on a coffee date (cellbit didnt even notice, roier did, an hes just awkwardly like... hahahahabah thats really weird why would spiderman stop him but also yeah i get that- why would thet get rid of MY hero <:((("

- cellbits subconsciously like. Shit. Pretty boy is pouting about the vigilante. More reason to find the motherfucker.

SORRY ITS SO LONG ENJOY THE RAMBLEEEE

WOW OKAY so let’s see:

1. It’s a lot like the Federation from the canon qsmp, but it’s also more overtly focused on ‘Protecting the City’ from superpowered threats. It stepped in to fill the shoes of the former police state, and by getting rid of the majority of police officers it both opened up opportunities for villains (and thus heroes and thus the Federation) and for heroes (see: previous parentheses.) The founder is anonymous, a “Mister Duck”.

2. I’m actually lowkey playing by MHA rules. Basically, at some point a couple of decades ago, kids started being born with superpowers. It was the more obvious ones that were discovered first, like a girl in France being born with little duck wings. Cellbit’s ability is less obvious, but his parents were constantly overly worried about him because babies and children are always very very scared of everything. Eventually he realized what was up when he was around nine or ten, but he didn’t really tell anybody because even back then he knew that he would “get in trouble” for it.

3. As for villainy, it was an accident. He needed money after his parents died (of sudden heart attacks, and he pretends he doesn’t know what that actually means), and he isn’t a very intimidating guy on his own, so he kinda… helped himself out a little. And it worked super well, so he kept doing it. And he kept doing it. And then he started going a bit overboard with it and the people he was robbing started dying, too.

4. And as for the murder, Cellbit and the hero were both civilians when they got into an argument. The hero, new to the whole thing, ended up using their ability and actually attacked him. He attacked back, notably without using his ability, and he accidentally killed them. The Feds were NOT happy about this, so they messed with the court proceedings and got him sent to prison for three years. But, hey, at least he got therapy there?

5 and 6. Jaiden is 100% working with the Federation in this au. She and Spider-Man are taking very different approaches to what is fundamentally the same issue here. I think her ability is more parrot-y, but she does work for them now. (It’s a very recent development.)

8-10. Spider-Man is a fan-favorite and the Federation does NOT appreciate him ruining their image!! And he knows that he isn’t well liked by them at the moment, and he doesn’t care because it’s fine if Spider-Man dies. He has a job to do, and he is going to do it.

11-end. And it’s a good thing that Cellbit is such a big Spider-Man fan! It’s something Roier thinks they can use to bond. Definitely. Bonding.

…Can you tell superhero aus are my guilty pleasure lol

#asks!#anon!#deli superhero au

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eris090 · 6 months

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Went to go get my thoughts in order so I can properly state how I feel about this

TL:DR: not good

I'm genuinely really fucking upset about this, and when I say that I AM NOT saying you should harass Wayne or anybody else over this.

I'm upset that I waited for 2 weeks for this, making it feel like the longest 2 weeks of my life, only for it to be a prank. I'm upset that I had a panic attack over this because I waited 2 weeks for something I'm HEAVILY hyperfixated on atm for it to be a prank.

And to all the ppl saying shit like "real rttv fans saw this coming a mile away, hlvrai children need to cope." Good for you on having a parasocial relationship with rttv to the point you think you're better than me for watching their streams, and you know adults have interests too right??? Mental illness doesn't just go away once you turn 18. ZERO hate to Wayne and his friends, I'm just autistic and deeply sad.

#hlvrai #dont harass wayne or his friends im pleading and begging #i just think its a little rude to tease something that you probably know several mentally ill ppl are into and then just prank them #idk just imo

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herofics · 8 months

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hii can i request geto or anyone else from jjk with a s/o who struggles a lot mentally and usually vents in poems (like writes poems in a diary) and they don't want them to see it bc they don't want them to be burdened with caring abt them? (also add that the s/o loves physical affection (only if you want)) i hope this makes sense ♡ and if you don't want to write this, it's okay

A/N: Hahah, being in a not so great mental state myself atm, I used my time writing this instead of doing my school work. Goddammit I feel like a lazy piece of shit lol. This isn’t really set in any particular point in time, but canon timeline, so Geto is doing his cult business and all that. I’m venting my own frustrations through this too. I can’t write a poem to save my life, at least not in english, so I didn’t write it out, but I did use the poetry thing anyway. I really needed to be called a “good girl” today, so that’s Geto’s job. I know I usually try to write gender neutral but I just really needed it and I couldn’t come up with anything that gave me the same vibe so I went with “good girl”

It was just so much. So much stress, so much work, so much everything. You felt like time was just slipping through your fingers. Everything was passing you by and you couldn’t grab onto anything.

“Why does this have to be so damn hard?” you muttered as you loaded the dishwasher.

Everyone else was doing fine, so why couldn’t you? Why couldn’t you just do the things others seemed to be able to do so easily? Everyone else could finish their assignments on time, why couldn’t you? Everyone was able to at least keep up appearances of managing their life, and you felt like you couldn’t even do that. Sure, you’d managed to keep yourself from drowning in all this crap, but you couldn’t keep treading water forever.

You weren’t exactly sure how you’d managed to keep Geto off your case for so long. Sure he’d pretty much been working nonstop for the last month, and had only been to the apartment occasionally. He’d even been sleeping at his office. The times he did come home, you’d managed to keep up appearances just enough that he’d thought you were only a bit tired. Besides, he didn’t need to worry about you too, he had enough on his plate already. No matter how much you missed him, his touch, his hands on your hips, him whispering sweet nothings into your ear, you didn’t want to burden him.

You finished loading the dishwasher and turned it on. At least you’d managed to do one thing. You went to grab your diary from your nightstand drawer and then walked back into the kitchen to sit by the table.

You were procrastinating doing your university assignments yet again. You hadn’t even started the essay you needed to turn in the next day. You felt like a lazy piece of shit. Why couldn’t you just get things done? It was just an essay, it was even a topic you were somewhat interested in, but nope, you just couldn’t do it. Instead, you decided to write something else. You’d always found poetry therapeutic, especially when you wrote it by hand instead of tapping away on your phone.

Your poem ended up being quite the stream of consciousness kind of thing, but writing your thoughts down on paper helped. It was no miracle cure to your ailment, but at least you got some of your thoughts out.

You left your diary, an unremarkable notebook, on the kitchen table as you went to the bathroom.

The last month had been incredibly hectic. There was a big event coming up next week for his cult, and Geto had been busy preparing for it. Writing his speech, and making sure everything was going smoothly. Of course he had assistants and people to handle these things, but he had the final say, so he had to approve everything.

Geto couldn’t help but miss you. Everytime he had gone home, you had seemed increasingly tired. Your usually witty remarks had turned bland, and you seemed almost apathetic at times. He usually wouldn’t put his work first when you were in such a state, but the event that was coming was very important for the cult, so he couldn’t really help it. Now that he had finished his speech and had left very specific instructions for his assistant, he felt like he could finally relax a little bit. He could finally make sure you were alright.

When Geto came back home and walked into the kitchen, he saw a notebook on the table. He didn’t think much of it as he picked it up and started flipping through it. He didn’t really read much, a word here, a sentence there, until he got the page with the most recent date. He didn’t even hear the toilet flush nor the running water as you washed your hands as he read through the poem.

“Why are you reading that?” you gulped as you returned to the kitchen.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean-”

“Oh? You didn’t mean to read it?” you interjected as you grabbed the diary from his hands. “Then why did you?” you asked tearfully.

“Honestly, when I started reading I couldn’t stop. Is this truly how you’ve been feeling lately?” he asked, motioning at the notebook, a pit of dread settling at the bottom of his stomach.

It’s not like he’d even missed the signs really, he had ignored them in favor of his work, and willingly or not, he had let you start spiraling.

“Even if I was, you had no right to read it without my permission, it’s private” you sniffled, clutching the diary to your chest.

“I apologize for reading it, but it’s necessary for me to know if you’re feeling like this. You don’t need to be alone with this” Geto said, placing his hands on your shoulders and rubbing them.

“But what if I want to be? What if I don’t want you to have to worry about me on top of everything else?” you noted, letting your arms fall to your sides, still holding the diary in one hand

“What do you mean everything else? There is nothing else when you’re not doing well” Geto said softly and pulled you into a hug.

By god how you’d missed this. His embrace, his warmth, the beating of his heart in your ear as you pressed the side of your head to his chest. He rested his chin on top of your head as he held you. You could feel all the apathy and the self-loathing melting away as he hugged you tightly and you returned his embrace.

“I do want to talk to you, Suguru. I just… I don’t really know how. It’s so much easier to write it down and not have to explain anything to anyone” your voice was muffled by his robes as you explained.

“I know the feeling, believe me” he sighed and kissed the top of your head. “You don’t have to explain anything to me if you don’t want to, but I still feel I deserve to know when the person I love is not doing well. Even if you don’t want to explain the reasons, at least let me know when you’re feeling down”

“Yeah, yeah”

Geto pulled back and took your face into his hands with an intense look in his eyes.

“Promise me?” he asked, looking at you intently.

“I promise” you sighed, but your lips curled into a small smile nonetheless.

“Good girl” he smiled and pressed a kiss on your forehead.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #geto suguru #geto x reader #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk x you #jujutsu kaisen x you #jjk scenarios #jujutsu kaisen scenarios #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jjk comfort #jujutsu kaisen comfort #jjk imagines #jujutsu kaisen imagines

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sammyxme · 1 year

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Imagine comforting Sam when he’s depressed (part one).

Pairing: Sam x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Depressed!Sam, Suicidal Thoughts, me projecting onto Sam, soulless Sam. TW don’t read if you’re struggling and can’t handle angst atm. My dms are always open to chat.

It had been a while since Sam had gotten his soul back. As his girlfriend, you were really concerned about Sam's mental state. He did so many terrible things while soulless. But it wasn't him. It didn't seem to matter to Sam. You noticed he hadn't been eating much over the past few days, and not to mention he's always plagued with nightmares. Sam was sitting on the motel bed, head in his hands.

"Sammy? You really should eat something, baby."

His head jerked up, realizing your presence. The way you stood in front of him, eyes filled with concern. You took notice of his red rimmed eyes, as well as the lack of sleep.

"Sorry, I just need some air."

He tried to stand from the bed, but fell back down. It must be affecting his body at an unhealthy level, if he couldn't even sit up without falling.

"Sammy, I know how it feels when you think everything is your fault. I know the world is pretty dark for you right now."

You sat next to him on the bed. Your hand finding its way through his hair.

"But you need to eat and drink and get some exercise. This isn’t healthy.”

Sam didn't know what else to do. He hated it when you got like this. Usually, he would have no problem telling you that he was fine, then leaving the room and going back to hunting. But he can't bring himself to do it today. He felt like giving in.

"Sam?"

Your soft voice snapped him out of it. He looked up to see you frowning. His face softened, seeing you worried. Your arm snaked around his waist, pulling him closer to you. You rested his head against your shoulder and began rubbing slow circles on his lower back.

"Hey. It's okay, Sam."

He looked at you, seeing tears pooling in your eyes. He quickly wiped them away before they could fall.

"I love you so much, Sam. Everything will be okay. None of this is your fault, okay?"

He felt guilty, knowing that he hurt you. He never wanted to be the cause of pain to anyone. He remembered the day he first came back, soulless. He had hurt you badly after getting in an argument. Sam had hurt himself over it multiple times, one cut, one bruise for every time he hit you. But it still wasn't enough, though the scars remained. You didn't know about his self destructive behavior yet. And he intended to keep it that way. What you don't know won't hurt you.

"Sammy?"

His gaze snapped back into focus.

"Hey, look at me."

He reluctantly met your eyes. You gently caressed his cheek, making sure he was looking you in the eye. You brought your other hand up to cup his chin.

"Don't ever blame yourself again. Okay? And tell me when you're struggling.”

You smiled at him, kissing his forehead. He leaned forward and gave you a hug, pressing your bodies close together. It was all he needed, to feel you close to him. Even if it made him feel slightly pathetic. You held onto him tightly, running your fingers through his hair.

"I don't deserve you, (Y/N)."

The words slipped from his mouth before he realized what was happening. You instantly pulled away, confusion evident in your expression.

"What are you talking about? Why do you think that?”

"I'm sorry. It's nothing...really."

You placed a hand on his shoulder.

"You can tell me, Sam."

You stared expectantly at him, waiting for an answer. It took a minute, but finally he decided to confess.

"It's just...I know it's selfish of me to say this, but I don't know if I should want to live anymore. I've done such horrible things to you, to Bobby, to Dean. I'm poison, (Y/N). I should’ve been left in the pit.”

"And how do you figure that? Because you're a monster? A soulless demon? That's bullshit, Sam. You aren't any of those things. Sure, you have your bad moments, especially lately. And sure, you make mistakes, like I know I do. But you're you again, Sam. And I love you."

Suddenly, Sam got up and excused himself. He didn't deserve this. He couldn't get too close to you.

"Yeah, um. I'm going out. Gonna go hunt for that Shapeshifter."

He grabbed his jacket and left, slamming the motel door behind him. He didn't want to let you see him breaking down like this. So he tried to hide behind a cold exterior and denial, to cover up his sadness. He hoped that it'll help him. And he'd take whatever he had.

(A/N: damn hit me right in the feels TT anyways hope you cried- I mean liked it.)

#Sam winchester #Sam imagine #Sam x reader #supernatural #Sam winchester x reader #angst #supernatural imagine #supernatural x reader #depressed!sam #soulless sam #SPN #SPN imagine #spn fanfic #supernatural fanfiction #sam winchester x you

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the-heart-of-a-monster · 1 year

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Ah yes. My favorite trope within fiction. The "Keeping the most dangerous and world-shattering secrets from all my friends and family because I don't wanna worry them when in reality this secret would benefit them all way better if they knew all along but I still won't tell them because the plot demands it" trope!

I'm honestly not too pissed about the usage of it here because while it can be annoying at times, it kind of makes sense here. Shadow is under just as much pressure as Sonic is, albeit without the eldritch horror transformation sequence. Besides, Shadow knows that Sonic is needed for this part of the journey, and he suspects that letting him know about the new information he acquired could demoralize Sonic. Wait lemme say that better: It could scare him away.

Sonic is now very keen on avoiding his Werehog form as much as he possibly can. He knows he can't avoid it during the night, but if he can keep it at bay during the day then he will do so with a smile on his face! I noticed he's done his best to avoid any and all things relating to his Werehog form other than the obvious during the day. Sure, nobody really asks him many questions about it during the day because, like, why would they? But Sonic is still avoidant. Not to mention, him and Shadow are growing farther apart, and it's because of Sonic's avoidance and stubbornness. (Don't worry, I also have no idea how to spell that correctly [Though I somehow got it right]) Rouge, in this new page, calls Sonic out on it and compares it to Shadow's own prowess.

The reason why everyone is keeping all these secrets from each other isn't just FoR tHe PlOt by the way. It's incredibly important this time around. If Sonic knew he could transform during the day from just being under the shade of a palm tree or if he were in a pitch-black room, the guy would avoid going on this mission entirely. Everyone who knows about Sonic's new form knows this fact, especially Shadow, so he's withholding information from his new blue buddy. Shadow doesn't like keeping secrets like these from Sonic because he recognizes that it is crucial information that he needs to know, but- Well, you know why, I've stated it like a million times. Rouge wants to tell him and is very much willing to do so if anyone gave her the chance because she's all about getting things done and being honest when necessary, and she's not aware of how avoidant Sonic is really being. She only knows the bare minimum of how this is affecting Sonic.

Meaning that if Shadow keeps the radio on for too long Rouge would willingly spill the beans and then Sonic would be outta there faster than anyone can say "Chili."

TL;DR, I repeat the same information too many times to count and explain why tropey cliches are actually important this time around.

I would say more about the mental state of Sonic and go deeper into his avoidance, but this is so incredibly wrong and I'm on borrowed time atm (school) so I'll save it for another, more emotionally charged page. (Silently begging for more emotional scenes because I love angst)

Thank you for all your hard work, and I really like this page in general! The colors are really pretty and I love how offended Amy looks when she gets called out- She's just like: "U wOt MaTe??????"

Also the last panel is in Sonic's POV. Change my mind. (IT IS SO PRETTYYYYY OH MY GOSH I LOVE IT THE DETAIL IS IMMACULATE)

Thanks for reading!

don't worry emotions are COMING

also good observation on sonics behaviour, as well as shadow's thought process.

#fan lore

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wakkass · 7 months

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Hey! First off i really love your art, it has so much expression and personality❤️💕

I saw your post critisizing Kataras look in season 3 and how they don’t let her show her weaker and more tired self, and tend to pretty her up compared to the rest to make her “more favourable to aang” I don’t really agree on that point and want to add my own two cents.

Both Aang and Katara have seen each other at their best and worst, mentally, physically, emotionally and totally wrecked from exhaustion and have supported each other through it.

Examples at the top of my head for katara:

-in the waterbending master when fighting pakku her hair gets messy and breathing becomea rigid and at no point lets go of her (fierce and justified) anger towards him, aang watches them and cheers for her through it (“Go Katara!”) Also not forgetting how he doesn’t want to be taught by pakku if he won’t teach her.

-in the chase all the gaang are exhausted beyond point and katara snaps multiple times, when trying to confront toph, aang attempts calming her down but she has her “IM COMPLETELY CALM” reaction and aang decides to back away. I see it as him respecting her anger and frustration and understanding she needs space atm.

-the desert all the gaang are not themselves and katara takes over as the leader in that situation, aang is incredibly distraught and furious about losing appa and it’s katara that manages to get everyone back on track, esprcially aang.

- this leads to the serpent’s pass where aang in return regrets his outburst at the sand benders and understand and appreciates kataras effort for what she did back there for all of them, esprcially him in his pure rage.

-the puppet master, katara forcibly learns bloodbending and is distraught over this fact. It’s a very brief moment in the last few seconds but she breaks down and aang and sokka comfort her without any words said and let katara hurt in that moment without any pressure to get it together.

-the southern raiders we see her at her possible worst and aang sees it too. He fully understand her anger and that she needs this journey to heal but doesn’t want her to lose herself by killing the man because it would destroy her to take a life even if he deserved it. Aang empathsizes with her and he is happy she was able to come to her own conclusion despite the pain thr both felt (her going through all these emotions and him seeing her not being herself at that moment before)

Phew sorry that was so wordy lol. Apologies^^”

I also think the show lets her be messy and not “perfect” in scenes without aang too (hakoda and her in S3EP1) but i know that wasnt ur og point.

I totally think the show can be critisized with certain designs tho tbf i don’t blame aang personally for blushing at her when she is really pretty, it is his crush and he is a boy in puberty. He loves her at her best looking times and messiest times (whether thats her emotional or physical state) and always shows it through words and other means of affection.

To end this needlessly long ask I agree with some of what u said but i wanted to add my own thoughts because i couldn’t get myself to agree on others. Sorry for any spelling or grammatical mistakes!

I love analytical posts and how they keep the gears in my head moving. Thank you very much for, firstly, reading my posts, it’s very nice. It’s immediately obvious that you also read the hashtags :3

Thank you for the compliments on my drawings, it’s very nice to hear 💖❤️💖

And, secondly, for writing your post and sending it to me, considering the idea from different angles and complementing it.

I want to say right away: no one is obliged to agree with me for the simple reason that each of us has his own interpretation of this series. It's too ambiguous to have only one true reading, and therefore the difference in points of view complements each other. It's IMPORTANT for us to have different opinions and help each other see different sides of interpretation :3

The phrase itself from the series is wonderfully suitable here, I can’t say it better:

It is important to draw wisdom from many different places. If we take it from only one place, it becomes rigid and stale. Understanding others, the other elements, and the other nations, will help you become whole... It can make you more powerful.

Regarding Katara’s fatigue, I said in hashtags here that it was only shown in two episodes: “The Desert” and “The Southern Raiders.” As you can see, @leanniera gave a few more examples, and I just want to leave them on my wall as part of the theme.

#atla #avatar: the last airbender #katara's fatigue #wakkass: answer

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daisys-reality · 2 months

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hello there daisy I hope that you are having a gooday so far today & is staying safe

I am giving you this little ask of mine because I wanted to ask of you to see if you could possbily show me in a lovely tarot reading of yours when & how I will enter the void state

bc I am currently trying to manifest myself to just randomly wake up in the void state & I am ngl I am having quite the trouble manifesting my desired scenario to come to fruition within the 3d

I just really want to enter it already & manifest my dream life & than after that just respawn to my wr & forever leave this disgusting universe

I am kinda getting sick & tired of dealing with these struggles rn & I would really prefer if I didn't have to deal with them at all

like the struggles that I am currently dealing with atm is just lack of trust, belief, faith, fear & doubts ect

I have many more problems that I'm dealing with that's just a few of them that I have pointed out

its just making things way more harder for me than it needs to be & I hate that so sm

i just wanna get things over with & just completely end my suffering

but I can't do that if I am dealing with this

so please tell me there is actually something good at the end of the tunnel for me bc I don't want to deal with these problems of mine anymore

also if you can you please add any random messages within the reading if there are any about me & my void state journey plz & thank you

btw I saw the angel number 1212 while I was making this ask for you

thought that I would tell you

Oh dear... I know its been already some time since I received this asked, so perhaps you already realized your plans. Even if not, I hope you're doing fine.

Regarding your tarot reading request, I will gladly do a reading for you. Perhaps it's not necessary anymore but I'll do it just in case. ^^

Is there something good at the end of the tunnel for you? How and when will you enter the void state? + Advice from beings who love you dearly :

. I see that your health, especially your mental health, will drastically improve. You will gain peace of mind through mental clarity. You will be able to give yourself the guidance you so desperately seek. You will set boundaries for yourself about what you allow to reach you. You decide what you believe and what doesn't serve you. You will be strict about it and it will keep you on your throne, unbothered and confident. You will be the sole ruler of your earthly experience.

. To be honest, I don't think you will necessarily enter 'the void state'. I feel like there is something else you will do.

. If your first reaction while reading this was to get extremely worried, don't. There is no need to worry. This message is coming in strongly. Someone is trying to assure you about that. What you need to do is to release the parts of your past that feel like heavy baggage that you still keep carrying. Your mind desperately needs release. That's where all the worries and confusion and desperation is stemming from. Forgive your past self and accept what lies in the past to move on to a new life free from (emotional) burdens.

. This might be a bit random but I had this vision of a girl who has a little bird who is still learning to fly but is seemingly too scared to try. The girl is stuck in a life threatening situation and only the bird can help her out but only if it flies. She doesn't want to let the bird know about here worries because she doesn't want to unnecessarily pressure the little one more than it already does itself. So, instead the girl tries to be strong and patient and puts on a smile despite her burdens; she gives the bird all the love and assurance that it needs so that it becomes stronger and stronger, day by day. Nurtured by this love and trust the bird starts believing in itself, feeling assured enough to leave its comfort space and successfully tries to fly. "Finally", the girl thinks while tears of joy and relief stream down her face. The girl has put her trust in the bird and kept going no matter how long it would take, no matter how dark her current situation was. In the end, the girl was so glad she did. Nothing could ever compare to the joy she felt in that moment. Finally freedom.

. You are the girl and the bird is your inner self. Learn to trust yourself and give yourself the love and time to be able to freely "to try to fly" regardless of fears and doubts. Pressure won't do you good, it will only paralyse you. Take care of yourself as you would with a baby bird. 🧡🌷

. Also, there is strong emphasis on how you have to choose your connections wisely. Only spend time with people that uplift you and bring you joy. Spending happy moments with others and spoiling yourself/fulfilling your needs is a key element in reaching your goal. Things are going in the right direction when you feel like the path you're on is making you happy. If it doesn't, you might have to rethink your decision/path. There are many options for you to be successful. Trust your instinct. You want to be happy, right? Like truly truly happy? Then, I'm sure you know exactly what to do to reach this state of bliss. 🐦🪹☀️

🚫 I DO NOT ACCEPT TAROT READING REQUESTS RIGHT NOW. 🚫

#t.asks #t.requests #void state #shifting #loassumption #manifesting

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pinkmoondoll9shihtzu · 2 months

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actually in the light of the last ask, have u ever found that recognizing something in a rationalistic way rather than letting ur spirit recognize it as an outside energy or spirit kind of, isolates it from the outside energy taking away its power, but at the same time takes away the power of any spiritual means of healing or affecting it? I feel like rationalized understanding like science and psychology is slowly isolating us from outside powers, taking away the influence of outside powers over us for good and for bad

hmm :3c i feel complicated about this.. Because i believe a huge tenant of psychic feeling is Logic, as intuition is logic in it's purest unfiltered form, and without the anchor of rationality how could we decipher messages of spirit? like there has to be something of material reference to channel the ethereal in a way that lends it'self to human understanding. Or you'll just be floating in a soup of ether all day long with no way to utilize it. and there's nothing wrong w that but it does not lend itself to aiding society unless it is brought down to earth.

so i don't find science to be inherently dubious althought i feel that in current society there is an over reliance on "data", and the need to fit everything into a box. over-categorization. people really believe in data. this don't sit right with me. especially when it comes to psychology. if you;re using math to build a road or like, a fucking airplane lol, then yes science is helpful, procedures ought to be followed precisely. but when it comes to the human mind & spirit, psychology & reliance on psychological "data" is not sound IMO.

and i take psychiatric medication too at times, which does help me cope with the conditions of living here on earth. however i know in my heart these conditions that cause me such dread go far beyond my own 'mental health' it is a spiritual sickness in society. if society were truly benevolent i would not need to do this. so i think you can acknowledge & recognize that the world is sick, while still being a psychiatric patient lol. does that make sense.. i dont know. sometimes i feel guilty that i take medication and struggle to feel Ok naturally but at the end of the day i feel everything that happens in my life has it's reasons. and i don't feel spiritually weak in any way.

however back in my youth i felt so weak when i was on ssris, those were the worst for me. also benzos make me instantly suicidal i've never been able to take a benzo with out mutilating myself physically. some substances i feel are more dangerous than others and it varies person to person. i know you said psychology in your message not necessarily psychiatry but i feel they are one in the same atm...like no one's Just getting diagnosed to put a name to their mental/spiritual state, people get diagnosed so they can find the /correct/remedy/.

this is just my opinions ofc..i feel there is a balance of understanding + putting a name to things + teaching / letting things Be + Flow + inner guidance. nothing is black & white, in material or in spirit. thats my thoughts ^-^ thanks for sending messages like this cus i have no one to talk about it with. <3 PMD9

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autisticlee · 7 months

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i've noticed that there's always a lot of discourse about trying on labels like for sexuality and gender for example. people saying if you dont know, don't claim am identity. people complaining about people using labels lying and being fakes. complaining when someone changes their lable/identity.

you even see it in conservatives who whine and cry about gender and sexuality saying stuff like "you can't know that yet/you're too young/what if it changes/you can't just decide now and change later" and seeing queer people say the same things can be super discouraging and alienating.

because the thing is, humans do change. It's a natural phenomenon we can't do anything about. it's perfectly ok to feel one way now and then realize you feel differently later on. it can be because life experiences changed who you, or you realize/discover something, or etc.

also, how will someone know who/what they are without trying things out to see what fits? to see what feels right? not everyone just KNOWS who they are or what they want or how they feel automatically. telling people they can't experiment to see what works does nothing but alienate them and make them feel even more lost and alone.

i know it's a bit more of a touchy and difficult subject and im debating adding it in, but I see a similar discourse for example in the autistic community where people try to gatekeep the identity for only "officially diagnosed" people. (I was trying to think of something else that's not only gender/sexuality because my whole point should apply to more than just queer identities but this is all I could think of atm) i've seen it in other communities as well (mental or physical illnesses and disabilities and stuff for example) you have to relate to an identity basically, in order to bring it to a doctor. usually a doctor won't just say "oh you have this!" on their own; you have to tell the doctor "I think I have this" and sometimes it takes you years of research to figure out things yourself (because we all know doctors can be useless at times) by that point, if someone is putting that much time into a thing, there less chance of them faking it. if they think they have a disorder like DID but don't, then they still need help. but there shouldn't be so much aggression towards people who get evaluated or reevaluated and realize they were wrong. it's actually ok to be wrong and correct yourself later, contrary to popular belief. 1 or 19 or even 100 people being wrong doesn't mean we should let that reflect on *everyone* and let people with ill intent call everyone a "faker"

even if it turns out you were wrong, there's no real harm in trying on things until you reach a final conclusion. it's other people's opnions and reactions to it that are the harmful part.

[imagine if you had to guess what clothes and shoes would fit you, look good on you, and feel good without trying them on, you have to decide on one only, and then you have to keep wearing only those clothes and shoes after that and can never change out of them. that's so silly, right?]

sometimes you have to make guesses about your identity first and get confirmation later. sometimes you guess that you are a cishet man and date a cishet woman and realize a few years into the relationship that you are actually a trans lesbian. It's perfectly fine and normal to change after some time! we all need to not gatekeep and instead support each other. accept each other either way.

if someone feels they are trans for years and transitions and then realizes they are actually nonbinary and maybe slides into a more androgynous state or even stops transition or detransitions, don't call them fake! if someone is aroace and then starts dating, realizing they felt that way due to trauma in the past but were able to heal from it, don't call then a fraud! if a lesbian falls in love with a man and realizes she's actually bi, don't say she lied or tricked you!

yes, I know that there's often stigmas and stereotypes about changing. the whole "it's just a phase" thing for example. or accusing people of "following a trend." and the whole fact that the phobes always try to force their harmful belief that these identities are a "choice" and "choosing" them is wrong. change can mimic "a choice," but change does not always equal choice! someone changing does NOT always mean they are choosing something different. many times in life change isn't a choice!!! the fact that reflects poorly on the lables/communities by those who already have a bias against them is what needs change.

but that's the thing. that's precisely what i'm saying. we need to break down those stigmas around change. so what if it's a "phase" ???? why can't someone have an experience for a short time and then change it later due to whatever reason or circumstances? why can't someone try something out and then realize it's not right later on? why do we have to decide on a label or identity for life while still trying to figure out who we are? why is someone naturally changing or realizing something about themselves considered lying and fake? why do we let other people's bad opinions create stigmas and stereotypes around everything and then let that dictate everything we do? instead of gatekeeping and hurting potential new community members, why can't we break down those stereotypes and stigmas instead? instead of shaming people who try out your lables, why not shame and demonize the people that throw stereotypes and stigmas at you just because someone else is trying to figure out who they are still????? why let haters dictate how you treat others?

choose the right battles. fight the right people.

#lee rambles #lgbt #lgbtqia #lgbtq community #queer #what do i tag this as???? too many words. brain tired from words and cant think of tags now #maybe those few will be fine for now #i hope this ramble made sense. it was hard to put into words. so not sure if it came across correctly or not #took forever to write. dont feel like proofreading. apologies for any typos or mistakes

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in-arlathan · 1 year

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Get To Know Me

Who dis? It's me! Been a hot minute, hasn't it? This year has been a pile of dung up until now, if I'm being completely honest, hence my absence from Tumblr and most social media. I had an accident in December and have been feeling like dirt ever since. But: I'm back now! Mostly thanks to my beloved @johaerys-writes and the amazing @mogwaei who tagged me for this game. Thanks to you two! ❤ It's been a please reading your posts.

And now: Let's dive in!

Share your wallpaper: I'm a very boring person who has her own artwork as a wallpaper on her phone (talking about this study I did last year). XD It reminds me that (every once in a while) I do create something that I actually enjoy without any self-doubt or regret, and I like that.

Last song you listened to: "Eyes Closed" by Ed Sheeran. I'm a very basic person, lol.

Currently reading: Let me check Goodreads real quick... Yeah, I'm reading far too many books at the same time again. So here's the top 3 of books I'm reading and enjoying the most atm:

The Blacktongue Thief by Christopher Buehlman

Priory of the Orange Tree by Samantha Shannon

Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir

There's also a bunch of fanfic I need to catch up on but my mind has been all over the place.

Last move: "Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves". My P&P podcast party had been invited to a preview 2 weeks ago and we had a fun time watching that movie.

Craving: Time off. I've been working non-stop for the past 8 months or so (with Christmas being the only exception) and I'm feeling super drained right now. Luckily, there are a few short trips coming up in April and July, so there is that!

What are you wearing right now: Basic black jeans and a white knitted sweater. It's spring but it's still flipping cold in my apartment. Ooph!

How tall are you: 168 cm or 5'5 feet (I guess?)

Piercings: Just the two for my earrings. As I said, I'm *very* basic. :')

Tattoos: Currently I got two but I plan on getting more later this year. Gotta save up some money first.

Glasses? Contacts? I got 3 different glasses (transparent, gold and brown frames) and contacts because I like to switch things up.

Last drink: I'm currently having some coffee with oat milk aka The breakfast of Champions. Or so I keep telling myself XD

Last thing you ate: Chicken wrap with lots of cheese. It was amazing.

Favorite color: My taste in color(s) shifts constantly but I'm currently obsessed with green in various tones. I keep getting back to like a warmer green because it makes me feel very cozy. But I also adore a good color combo of orange and violet/lilac or yellow and dark blue. It depends on my mood.

Current obsession: Truth be told, because of the current state of my mental health, I have a hard time being obsessed about anything. It's not like I can't enjoy things (I know that that feels like and I don't want to get back to *those days*) but there's not hyperfixation that lives rent-free in my head. And you know what? It feels terrible! I miss the feeling of being utterly obsessed about something. I crave that level of excitement, honestly!

Unrelated Obsession: Okay, I guess this means non-fandom obsessions. I do have one of those! A short while back, I read a book by the title "Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World" which was fascinating. I loved that it was not Euro-centric and instead focussed on the achievements of Genghis and his successors. I've been gobbling media with the same or similiar topics – including finally playing "Ghost of Tsushima" which send me reading up on the Mongol invasion of Japan. It's been an intriguing ride!

Any pets: I'm too allergic to have cats, dogs, and other animals and I hate it. I want a little doggo so badly... 💔

Do you have a crush on anyone: IRL? Not anymore. I used to have a crush for most of last year but since he started ghosting me a few months back, I decided to focus my attention elsewhere. I'm *done* with dating and have been for the past couple of years. As for fictional characters... I have to go with Solas, although (as I mentioned) my excitement has died down somewhat. I still love that boy to death but I'm not as obsessed as I used to be.

Favorite fictional character: How dare you make me chose one?! I have a trillion fave characters and they're all precious to me ;_; No, I will not pick one because I truly can't!

The last place you traveled: I went to Cologne, my hometown, three weeks ago, but I assume that doesn't count as traveling. I think my last real vacation was in 2019 when I travelled to the Leipzig Book Fair. Oh my... 😅 (And I was wondering why I felt so drained all the time, lol. Dang... what a reality check. This hurts!).

That's it! Hope you enjoyed the read :3

Time to forward some tags. As always, please feel free to join in or ignore the tag: @serial-chillr @faerieavalon @thebookworm0001 @ohmypawsandwhiskers @pikapeppa @oxygenforthewicked @fiadhaisteach @noire-pandora @ellie-effie. Sending all of you lots of love. I hope you're doing great!

Until next time, lovelies! <3

#personal #tag game #get to know me

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system-of-a-feather · 8 months

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Hey totally disregard this if this is too personal, but I was wondering if you manage your NPD and stuff in therapy and if you do, how you went about talking about it to your therapist? I recently have figured out my own NPD and I have no idea how to manage it. If anything I feel like I've just been back sliding on my own. If you have any tips, I'd appreciate it.

Honestly, we are starting to think we MIGHT not have it and miss construed our autism + our specific trauma / CPTSD to be NPD OR that we do have it but its largely in remission and our memory issues makes us devalue and under weigh our past experiences over the present

Either way, we do have undeniable TRAITS at the very least, and while I don't know if I can speak to NPD cause Im not too sure if we have it or not atm, I can say a way to manage some of the traits ("peacocking" aka what we call the compulsive need to present everything in a beautiful, powerful, ego protecting manner that creates a large distance between yourself and others and illicits a response from others if awe and amazement; doing things to prove to yourself and others that you are smarter and more special than others; doing things under the impression that Only You Can Do It and You are Specially Made to Do It; etc) is to become aware of what behaviors and tendencies you have and do, reflect on them and genuinely question whether they are actually getting you what you actually want and actually need and genuinely see if what you are doing is ACTUALLY good for you

And for the things that aren't genuinely getting you what you want / need, are not helping you be who you would like to be or do things you would like to do, are causing issues in your life that probably arent great, etc take mental (or physical) note of them and specifically keep set reminder for yourself that "While I feel and think XYZ, we know this is a Thing I Do and even though it feels good, fun, secure and right rn it is part of the NPD tendencies and will probably result in a predictable long term negative result" and to just try to repeat that to yourself whenever you can and/or have someone you respect the opinion on be allowed to state it to you

Eventually if you hear it enough and repeat it to yourself enough, it becomes easier to actually listen to it.

Honestly NPD tendencies underly almost all of our parts so we kinda weaponize it and hound eachother for being "fucking stupid" cause we all think the other is stupid for their unhealthy NPD presentations so its kinda like alcoholics helping alcoholics by calling eachother out and keeping them in check.

In that sense, having a friend with NPD is helpful if possible honestly.

I dunno, Im just casually responding and rambling. Take this with a grain of salt as I might just have NPD tendencies and not actual NPD (still might, but we stopped working on PD diagnostics with our therapist cause it seemed unnecessary beyond the conversations it brought up in therapy and internally)

#alter: riku #ask #asks #advice #npd

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