#because neurodivergency exists in the context of society

[wherevenusholdssomeofficespace]

Linda Flynn-Fletcher

I think Linda Flynn-Fletcher is potentially one of the most misunderstood characters in the show.

It think comes from a natural enough place. Her role in the show is of course, to act as the potential threat to their summers of fun. While they boys never see her as a threat, narratively she's the big bad. If she sees it, its game over.

Here's the thing though. She's a not a bad mom. Her children LOVE her. Similarly to how Phineas and Ferb absolutely adore Candace and would do nearly anything she asked, Phineas, Ferb and Candace all love and respect their mother and don't disobey her. Now a bit of this is clearly Linda being a more permissive parent, but any rules that Linda has Phineas and Ferb never do anything to disobey their mother. While I wouldn't be surprised if there were one or two instances where Candace disobeyed her mother willfully, the closest I can think off off hand is Candace not doing a bunch of chores that she was supposed to do. Really, the fact that all her kids love her, shows how much all her kids feel loved in their household. And I think that's super important. Candace wrote a song about how much she feels loved by her mom, even if her mom is dismissive of Candace. But she still goes with Candace to see what the boys are up to even if she doesn't believe it. She sets boundaries on how often Candace can bust the boys sure. But she hasn't forbidden Candace from doing it altogether. Nor does she punish Candace for presumably lying?

At MOST Linda will say something like: "let's get you out of the sun" after a failed bust. The worst of it I think is probably the time Linda made her promise not to try or suffer the Pharaohs curse. Which, was just some guy in a Pharaoh costume telling Candace curse you. Linda goes out of her way to read books to try and deal with her daughter. She and Candace still clearly hold a lot of affection for each other and do spend a decent amount of mother daughter time together. Linda gives books to her daughter, tries to direct her to other activities, and finds her sleep busting cute, and sometimes goes out of her way to do activities her daughter wants to do with her. All things considered Linda is REALLY patient about Candace's busting. Could she be doing more to get to the bottom of why Candace is presumably acting out? Sure. But Doofensmirtz could also be doing a better job of listening to his daughter and not insulting her (or do we not remember why Vanessa wears earbuds around the house) but we all call him a really good dad.

A LOT of shows have kids hiding a secret from a parent for one reason of another. But while the crux of the show rests on Linda not knowing what her sons are doing, its not because its a secret. The boys aren't hiding it from her. The boys genuinely believe she knows. Lawrence genuinely believes she knows. Candace is the only one in the family who really grasps the situation.

Linda's ignorance, her disbelief of the wild shenanigans that her children get into is easily mistakable for normality. For representing the oppressive day to day. The same thematic antagonist as school. A mom who wants whats best for her kids, and thinks that whats best for them is them being normal, without realizing what's really best for them. After all why else we saw what would happen if she found out in Quantum Boogaloo. But the fact of the matter is aside from that one future (which also featured an effectively evil leader in Doofensmirtz, and therefore implies more factors at play than just Doofensmirtz and Linda's characters), we don't really know how it would play out in the long term. Future Linda even just kinda moves on after discovering the truth.

Linda is exactly like her kids. She just does the same things on a less physics breaking scale. The woman has like 37 different hobbies. She takes a cooking class, donated an art sculpture, is part of a jazz group. She has a background in astrophysics. She was a pop star. She won a meatloaf contest. She takes french lessons. The fact that Linda has several hobbies is part of the reason the formula works at all. Linda is constantly trying new things which gets her out of the house, while her sons are trying their own new things. Her absence is what prompts Candace to have to go looking for her. Also, What Do It Do when the moment Linda gets put in Candace's position she acts the exact same way.

Also it's why she and Lawrence are so compatible. They have a lot of weird hobbies they spend together. She likes Lawrence's history references. They watch car racing together. They went spelunking together. They go bowling regularly enough to have equipment. She has played the bagpipes while Lawrence danced (which sidenote: do you think she taught Candace how to play the bagpipes?).

Not to mention her extended family. Think about it. Her mom was a competitive roller derby skater who once bit a skate and shook it like a dog with a chew toy and pulls elaborate pranks with her identical twin. Really she's a lot like Candace with her aggressive passion. Her dad apparently won a balloon race, but tells the story in the most straightforward way possible, sometimes very oblivious, but is overall a lot like Phineas. Her sister is an adrenaline junky. And back to Quantum Boogaloo for a minute: Her granddaughter is just like Candace, Grown up Candace is a lot like Linda. Do you not see the implications!!?!?!? LIKE???? DO YOU NOT REALIZE THAT LINDA WAS PROBABLY A LOT LIKE CANDACE AND PHINEAS WHEN SHE WAS YOUNGER?!!?! YOU THINK IT SKIPPED A GENERATION OR SOMETHING???

Do you think Linda used to complain about Tiana??? Do you think Linda thought her family was weird and was embarrassed by them??? Do you think Linda ever called herself the only mature/normal member of her family?? LIKE CANDACE DOES????

Anyway, Linda is just like her family. Sure, she is RELATIVELY more normal, but that's relative, and probably simply because the universe bends itself around to keep her from knowing. Linda literally cannot find out about the real nature of her universe. Linda is just a grown up version of her children, seeking to make the most of each day, but within the bounds the universe has set upon her, both as an adult woman and mother, but also in the laws of physics expected of her. But she still makes the most of her life. You don't have to build a roller coaster to make the most of each day and all that.

I think if Linda is representing anything its that even parents can have rich fulfilling lives. Where they make the most out of each day. Having fun with your life doesn't stop with adulthood. Even if you have more responsibilities doesn't mean you can't have fun? Sure childhood is something you can't get back but growing up isn't inherently bad either?

#pnf #phineas and ferb #linda flynn fletcher #The woman is a former pop star #and has a secret background in astrophysics #you would think that would be enough but nooo #i generally don't care to comment on the suspected neurodivergent status of cartoon characters #because neurodivergency exists in the context of society #and cartoon characters exist in a completely different context #and when characters are inspired by real people (like Linda being inspired by Dan's sister) it can get messy #but if Phineas and Candace and Doofensmirtz are ADHD so is Linda #she just has adult woman flavor ADHD #aka the reason that woman and girls go underdiagnosed or are often diagnosed with anxiety instead #I think we often don't recognize how frequently she forgets things #I'm thinking back to that one time she forgot the “stuff” at the grocery store #she stayed up all night making last minute pies #working up to the deadline on an art sculpture #at one point runs out of contacts (presumably because she forgot to get more) #gets overwhelmed when planning the block party #and that's just what I can think of off hand #anyway I will not stand for Linda slander

[frickfatphobes]

I made a connection that's kind of interesting to think about. First, though, a little context.

Fatphobia is generalization and hatred aimed at fat people.

According to a fatphobe, if a fat person eats a lot, that's the only reason why they're fat and that's bad. Or if a fat person is disabled, it means their body or mind has become ill due to their fatness. Or if they're unhygienic, that's just how fat people are -- they're gross.

These are just a few examples of fatphobic stereotypes.

There are many, many more assumptions that people make about fat people because society and media have given them many chances to assume their confirmation bias is correct yet again.

But when you stop and think about human beings in general, some people just eat a lot, and some people are disabled, and some people just don't have the capacity to clean and groom themselves every single day.

It's okay.

We as fat people should not be cut off from food or laughed at for eating, condemned for disability, or bullied into showering seven times a week if we don't have the time or energy for it.

But here's the interesting part: as soon as society ditches fatphobia and fat people are allowed to exist without constant hatred on our backs, there will still be fat people who eat a lot of food, who are disabled, who are unhygienic. Imperfect fat people will still exist, just like they do now.

And that does NOT mean that the fatphobes were right all along.

If all fat people are "bad fatties" because they're not trying to be thin, or not trying to limit eating, or not masking their neurodivergence or not trying to go without a mobility aid, or not showering every day --

then maybe it just means it was never bad to be any of those things while being fat in the first place.

#fat liberation #fat positivity #fatphobia

[xxlovelynovaxx]

Well, since tumblr randomly ate my pinned... -_-

About us:

We're the Stars system, a massively polymultiple and polyfragmented mixed origin DID system. We consider ourselves an infinite system.

Our pronouns are fae/it unless specified otherwise. When referring to multiple of us, you are welcome to use fae&/it& or you& for clarity. If you are up for it, we would also appreciate second person neopronouns being tried out (substituting neos for 'you'), and sometimes we use first person neopronouns (substituting neos for 'I/we')

Some of our labels include (we use general/umbrella labels in places to indicate that we use many of those kind of labels):

(disability)

POTS

MCAS

likely ME/CFS

chronic pain (likely fibromyalgia)

other unspecified chronic illness symptoms

physically disabled with mobility disabilities

anxiety

PTSD and C-PTSD

DID w/strong dp/dr symptoms

schizophrenia/psychotic

cluster B spectrum disorder, comprehensive subtype (we meet the diagnostic criteria for all four cluster B disorders and our symptoms are heavily interrelated)

OCD

autism

ADHD

MADD

OLD (a medically unrecognized disorder)

neurodivergent and neurodisabled

cognitive disabilities

cripple

mad

often housebound, sometimes bedbound (less so now that we have a wheelchair)

low to mid masking

low to mid functioning

mid to high support needs

(system)

traumaendo mixed origin

infinite system

aside from traumagen and endo, spirigenic, schizogenic, bordergenic, paragenic, tulpagenic, and more

(queer)

Abro (and use lesbian, gay, queerhet, bi, pan, omni, and mspec and straight lesbian/gay labels)

transneufemmasc, transfluid

intersex

altersex/salmacian

pangenderfluid, kingender, xenogender, agender, maverique, intergender, multigender, androgyne, and others

faegender

butch and femboy

queer

demigrey aroace and grey apl among others

lesboy/turigirl

radinclus

(other)

alterhuman

otherkin (especially fae/changeling, but pankin across the whole system)

otherhearted

copinglink and linktypes

hearthome

choicekin

constelic

demihuman and nonhuman both

endel

humankin

flickers

hivemind

multiversal

reality shifters

nonperson

We are pro-endo and pro-tulpa, anti-psych and anti-phys, pro-mad-liberation and cripplepunk inclusionists and coined unitypunk. We are kff safe and do not believe ANY identity that someone genuinely identifies as, that is not specifically based on intentional harm to others, can be inherently or ontologically harmful. We are proship/profic and ourselves are survivors of a specific kind of SA that cannot be directly spoken about here. We are also anti-forced-recovery and don't believe in consensus reality.

We also do not believe it is okay to make fun of reality shifters just because it's the current acceptable target, and find it especially hypocritical coming from otherkin. Even if it was always harmful, the appropriate response would be genuine, non-patronizing concern, offering resources, and then backing the fuck off if people can't or won't "recover". That being said, most "anti" sentiment in this context is heavily sanist and centered around the idea of a "correct" consensus reality. Not trusting people to be right about their own subjective experiences is both sanist and just generally an asshole move.

We believe transandrophobia exists, that everyone can be affected by transmisogyny and that TMA/TME labels are reductive and often bioessentialist and intersexist in usage, and that exorsexism and the above are all serious issues both within the trans community and in society as a whole. We support transunity. We also are pro-complicated and conflicting labels, such as mspec lesbian/gay, straight lesbian/gay, transmasc lesbians, and lesgay/lesboy/turigirl labels.

We are transhumanist and support bodily autonomy and good faith identity with NO. EXCLUSIONS. If you think this doesn't apply to you, I promise it still probably actually does. We do our best to judge people on their actions, not their thoughts, feelings, or anything else that occurs internally. We also don't believe any body modifications or exercise of personal bodily autonomy is wrong.

We also believe it's not wrong to be unhealthy, to refuse or be unable to recover, and that healthism is ableism. Disabled people (including neurodivergent people) are the most reliable authority on their own experiences. Also, if someone says they were called a slur, you should believe them, and they have a right to reclaim it regardless of if you think they have the "right" identity (outside of perhaps racial/ethnic slurs, which I feel is not our place to comment on). Slur, label, and flag discourse is all bullshit cop behavior and y'all need to stop it.

There's probably more that we'll come back and add later, but for now, here's a new pinned.

#pinned

[spop-romanticizes-abuse]

I'm not the last 'autistic double standard Entrapta' anon but I am an autistic adult and I actually find discussions like these really interesting and just wanted to say my two cents. I am one of those autistic adults that tends to act more childish; not on purpose, that's just how I am. And there are lots of other adults on the spectrum who act similar or in the same way.

The problem isn't that we exist, the problem is that the media and society proceed to treat us like babies for it. I personally found Entrapta really enjoyable and relatable, but that quickly turned into disgust and horror when the other characters put her on a leash and pulled on her hair.

Hordak was the only person (that I can think of) that treated Entrapta as an actual adult, an intelligent and capable woman. I have no problem with shows and books portraying neurodivergent people to act more childish than the average adult; just make it so that the rest of the cast respects them as they should. Entrapta herself isn't the problem, it's how the show writers and most of the fandom treat her.

(btw this isn't an angry letter or an attack, I actually really loved the previous question and the response that you gave, this is just me offering my opinion LMAO sorry if it seemed like I was hostile)

dw you don't sound hostile at all! i totally get it. it's always helpful to have different perspective from people in the spectrum because i haven't interacted with that many autistic people apart from myself. neurodivergence is different for everyone so i didn't consider that entrapta being childish would not be that unrealistic.

and yeah, i agree. the way they treated entrapta was so fucked up, regardless of the context. no one should be treated that way and it's even more telling that the only character who was treated like that was the "weird and asocial" canonically autistic character. literally no one else in the series was so dehumanized. (not to mention, since entrapta can move her hair around, it's likely that pulling her hair would have hurt more than it would for a normal person.)

apart from hordak, i think scorpia also tried her best to understand and empathize with entrapta. scorpia is pretty childish herself so idk if she treated entrapta as an adult, but she considered entrapta as her close friend, and at least tried to be nice to her unlike mermista and perfuma.

it's just so unfortunate that entrapta is one of the few canonically autistic characters, and the show basically tells people that it's okay to dehumanize and mistreat autistic people.

#spop critical #spop #spop salt #spop discourse #spop criticism #she ra #she ra critical #she ra discourse #she ra and the princesses of power #she ra criticism

[annabelle-creart]

More (head)canon for the Life of Rescue Bots AU, an AU where the rescue team discover by accident that multiverse exist and magic as well.

Don't think wrong, they are not involve in Nani's and multiversal shit, they just discovered it because a weird scientist kidnapped Heatwave thinking he was some else.

But the begining: Nani is a 13 years old witch, she, her familiar Cookie (a fusion beetween Stolas the mayor demon and Templo a minor demon) and the rest of her team, Ali, the leader of the 40 thiefs from Dakota, Sigfried, the best singer of Paris suburbs, Varni, his powerful shadow companion (a shapeshifters beings who don't belong to any universe), Jack, the famous dead assasin redeemed by Hercules himself and Mr. D, the mayor Arcana and ruler of chaos, all of them protect the multiverse with their habilities and evade the merge of them, that's the only way to protect the future from a war and the variants from the distorsion of their realities. But a shadow, like Varni, wanted that to end, the portals have magic and magic is the blood of the multiverse, close the portals will be catastrophic, and that's what Alex wanted, so, he team up with a scientist named Orlo to use five members of the Multiverse protectors to create one great warrior capable of destroy the protectors and close the portals, because Alex tought that will be the only way to protect the multiverse without "consequences", but instead of Nani's team, Orlo called and kidnapped variants of her team, Nani was constant, but Heatwave, instead of Ali, Camila Severin instead of Jack, Cosmo (yes, the fairly oddparent) instead of Sigfried and Lily the Glitter Peace instead of Mr. D. were taken away. Nani, Cookie and her new teammates passed Orlo's trials 'till their companions find them, but with this secret, the 4 decided to become part of the Multiversal Protectors Society in their own ways, in Heatwave's case, he decided to collaborate by being an adviser and carer for beings who can't stand in ther universes, including Chris, a shadow who playing with Blades accidentaly put the team in danger in their own minds.

Despite the pre context of the Au, Life of Rescue Bots is completely based only in the Rescue Team, Cybertronians, Velocitrians and humans way of life, habits, past and future selves. The Au include ships, self insert, drama, angst and the whole team is neurodivergent.

And that's the context. More in the proximity😎✌️

Ps/edit: this universe/Au is based in/have the same events of TF Rescue Bots, TF Earthspark, some of IDW, some of TF Prime and NONE of RiD 2015 (that shit never happened, but Bee's team exist)

#art #for you #oc artwork #magic #transformers #for your page #rescue bots #Life Of Rescue Bots #BoulderxHeatwave #Life Of Rescue Bots Au

[asterchats]

(this is a word dump about being neurodiverse and disabled but also traumatised enough to be able to mask sometimes, and medical people's reactions to it, you're good to skip this if you wanna, i'm fine just complaining, love u)

also the fact that my adhd is so unconventional for what it is. i did really, like, REALLY, well in school. i can usually rely on adrenaline (anxiety) and hyperindependence through trauma to help push me through 3/7 days a week, which isn't bad, and the after-effects only come in from exhaustion of masking all day (although bump it up to four and i do get. suicidal kdslfjlksj). i can keep clean spaces if anyone else might possibly ever see them but cannot keep clean spaces that are private/my own. and also i forget everything i try to do for myself, never buy what i went to the store for in the first place, constantly forget that friends exist, hyperfocus accidentally, i am able to do things ONLY because of deadlines

all of the hallmarks of "your disorder is ONLY a disorder if it's stopping you from achieving things in your day to day life" are things that i don't meet because i have about 20929348 systems in place which I've developed over the years to force myself to meet deadlines and not forget things Including a great deal of childhood "you're not good enough/independent enough" trauma resulting in hyperindependence. and then unmasking at home is Exhausting and i haven't eaten or peed all day or had anything to drink and I haven't spoken to any friends and have no energy to speak to any friends and i have to go lie in a dark room for two hours and i have chronic pain i haven't noticed all day and i'm too exhausted to even cook and i semi-regularly end up not eating at all on the days i work and my friend tells me something and I !!!!!!!! have no idea what they said two seconds afterwards!!!!!! sometimes i literally forget what i am saying right in the middle of saying it like 3 words into a 10 word sentence!!!!!!!!

something something pathologising neurospice and prioritising predominantly medical views of it (i.e. rejecting self-diagnosis - although I do have a diagnosis from a nd-specialising psych) completely ignores that neurodivergence! should not be! diagnosed! by its deficits!!!!!!!!! you can't just LOOK at someone and say "hey you're, like, surviving in this society so we're not going to Label You As X" like being offered access to 'x' is a Fate Worse Than Death. like anyone who is neurodiverse is not allowed to have figured out a way to survive when in fact figuring out a way to survive is something we've been doing our entire lives.

also!!!!! my systems i've put in place are literally the systems explicitly taught to people who have adhd to make their lives easier!!!!!! i just didn't have a diagnosis before i started figuring out how to make my life easier for myself. so like what? i don't count now because i didn't pay someone with a medical degree to "coach" me?

and as much as this is a critique of the medical model of disability it's also a critique of the way the disability community goes "well EVERYONE..." like it is everyone. it is not. hate being alienated from people who Get It because they get it but they don't get the way it applies to me. i am privileged to be able to work 3 days a week consistently for 3+ years at this point, i also sometimes starve idk. idk idk. i have an entire internal phenomenological experience to write about but i am not sure i have anything interesting to say in the disability context that hasn't already been said.

part of being neuro-affirming is knowing that everybody is different. and not everybody can be looked at from the outside through a Deficit Model because they're very good at hiding it. and in fact affirmation starts with knowing those strengths are there and have been there all along

[soraka-in-warhammer40k]

I wonder if Genestealer Cults as a faction resonate with ADHD/Autism people the same way the Adeptus Mechanicus has been a thing with trans/nonbinary-people. Like, obviously not all toaster-enthusiasts are part of that group, but you can't deny that a faction that does extensive ritualistic body-modifiactions and that adheres even less to gender norms than they do to the human form in general definetly will find a dedicated following in that specific audience.

Meanwhile the Genestealer Cults are like "Here's a bunch of outcast mutants bullshitting their way into being a legit 40k army". There's still the bit of lore that links them to the Nid's but going by general faction aesthetics that's pretty irrelevant, except maybe for the fact that it locks out Chaos involvement. You could remove the link entirely and turn them into "Mutant Revolution Cults" and the entire army would lose maybe two units (Purestrains and Patriarch).

They are by definition the most underdog-faction in the setting, even more so than the Guard. Like, a guardsman might just be a regular random guy with a lasgun, which is laughably low in power level compared to what he is facing, but that does not change the fact that said guy is involved in the largest military complex the galaxy currently knows. If you are a random mutant getting thrown into combat it's essentially you, your friends, and whatever your cousin three-arms-Larry nabbed from the mining site last week - and you all gotta rub your three braincells together to make this work, because you are horribly outgunned.

And WHY are they in that position? Because they are outcasts simpy for how they are born. Doesn't even matter if no one knows about the Nids or if you specific mutation can even be useful in a way, imperial society puts mutants not fitting into very specific exception-categories right next to heretics and therefore deserving of death.

That's not very far from "if your neurodivergent ass can't function in capitalist society go starve" if we are being honest here - and given the amount of insane hyperspecialized genius-types (see all character unit choices) the mutations create, "neurodivergent" does suddenly become a fitting descriptor for the whole bunch of them.

So if you've spent your life with an undiagnosed mutation in your brain that no doctor noticed but your middle school peers definetly did, a mutation that within the proper context is even a benefit at times but that makes regular existence within capitalism even more unbearable than it already is, then I would not be surprised if the GSC become THE faction to run - especially when you got some serious issues with authority as part of your whole thing and your primary opponent in lore is the Imperium of Man, the most authoritarian regime in the setting.

Also it would explain why 95% of GSC combat plans look like this

#warhammer 40k #wh40k #genestealer cults

[horizon-verizon]

Despite the fact that Helaena has like one quote in the book yet she has more characterization there than her cringe show version.

*EDITED POST* (1/14/23)

Quote from book in question:

One-eyed Prince Aemond, nineteen, was found in the armory, donning plate and mail for his morning practice in the castle yard. “Is Aegon king?” he asked Ser Willis Fell, “or must we kneel and kiss the old whore’s cunny?” Princess Helaena was breaking her fast with her children when the Kingsguard came to her...but when asked the whereabouts of Prince Aegon, her brother and husband, she said only, “He is not in my bed, you may be sure. Feel free to search beneath the blankets.”

("The Blacks and the Greens")

And Helaena in the corresponding scene in HotD? When the people came in to ask about Aegon? She sits silently while we focus on Alicent interacting with them instead.

Once again neurodivergence and having prophecies that other people ignore is not enough to create PERSONALITY. Cassandra was a figure written in epic poetry and in an ancient Greek tradition that already doesn't present figures and their motivations the way modern fantasy tales do...because they were religious/pseudo-religious figures for cultural, ethical, and etiological paradigms in the first place. We forget that ancient Greek myths were religious and/or meant to be instructional. Some of them PLUS epics were used to praise/affirm already-existing systems, modes of behaviors (esp militaristic), specific rulers, or styles of rule, therefore it was less important for the Greek power or the society to create a real "personality" (as we understand it) behind the prophetess. Of course, you can glean so much alternative meaning or value from one myth in the current day, but:

that does not mean there weren't dominant social purposes in the historical context where these myths existed, like how some Christina stories are meant to convey a singular message to Christians/Christian societies; subsequently informing its people's ideas about power, who should have it, and when, etc.

Cassandra's story and how she ends is straightforward; Cassandra is a prophetess who loses most of her agency from the curse Apollo put on her for, in most versions not acting as he wants her to or refusing to get into a relationship with him. After Troy falls, she's taken as Agamemnon's concubine obviously against her will. Agamemonon's wife Clytemenstra, with her lover Aegisthus, kill both Cassandra and Agamemnon; in some versions, Cassandra had kids with Agamemnon and Clytemenstra also had those killed. The curse plus how Cassandra never gets longstanding relief or succor (as the point of the curse was) is demoralizing without any sort of modern adaptations or modifications, which the show does not provide.

Just in that one line from the book, yes, we can see a Helaena that HotD neglected. Episode 8 doesn't count because it served to reveal more about Aegon and she was slightly drunk, and it's too easy to chalk up her being so open about Aegon due to the drunkenness without accompanying scenes of her alone, interacting with her brothers, Rhaenyra, etc.

#asoiaf asks to me #helaena targaryen #helaena's characterization #book vs tv comparisons #hotd characterization #fire and blood characters #hotd comment #cassandra and helaena #greek mythology #greek epic #character comparison #hotd critical #hotd #asoiaf #fire and blood

[joeytwoeyes]

there's this neurodivergency experience i feel like no one talks about. the "wait, everyone gets that? i thought it was just a [DISORDER] thing"

when you assume something is happening because of your condition, but actually it's a fairly normal experience? but because you don’t know what it's like to be neurotypical, you just make an assumption, and it leads to you feeling more alone than you otherwise would have.

i feel like the only place i see this discussed is in a context where people are making fun of each other, and it feels really off sometimes. (especially when people are talking about autism and adhd, bc as far as most people are concerned that's all neurodivergency is. which is unfortunate.) like people skip right past the idea that "people with mental disorders don't know what it's like to NOT have a mental disorder, so they sometimes misidentify things" and go right to "youre just making things up for your trendy little neurodivergency club." and that sucks! because there are a lot of problems with how online communities discuss these topics (how they become really insular and disconnected from society; how symptoms and conditions get discussed only as far as they can be turned into Trendy, Relatable Content; how they end up constructing this idea of "a neurotypical person" that doesn't really correspond to anything that exists in reality, and then defining themselves against that - there's a lot there.)

#neurodivergent #neurodiversity #neurodivergence #using these tags to bait someone more articulate than me to respond to this

[glassprism]

What do you think about Erik being queer-coded/interpreted as queer by fans?

For context, I am queer myself, and I grew up in an environment where it was... not really accepted, let's say, so I'm not going off of stereotypes here. It's true; he does live in a theatre, he's dramatic as all hell, and he can put an outfit together like nobody's business, but this goes a bit deeper for me.

Throughout his whole life, Erik was told that he was a monster because of the way he was born. This, combined with the abhorrent treatment he received because of his difference pushed him so far from humanity that he ceased to feel human at all. Although that 'difference' is his physical deformity and not sexuality, the parallels are there- he's been forbidden from loving because of that difference as well. I'm not saying that gay people are all completely alienated from society, but being treated as strange, dangerous or inhuman can have an effect on you.

When he sings about being "Hounded out by everyone, met with hatred everywhere," it strikes a chord with me. I've never been chased by an angry mob, but it's all too easy for me to imagine what he's been through because of my experiences. I wonder if there are other fans who feel the same way.

I'd think that many fans have actually felt the same way as the Phantom, again not to the extremes that of the Phantom's experiences, but the feeling of being outcast, shunned, different. It's part of why the Phantom's story has such universal appeal - probably everyone knows the feeling of not being accepted because of their gender, sexuality, race, culture, nationality, disability, and so on.

So no, I certainly don't have any problems with the Phantom being interpreted as queer or queer-coded, just like I've never had any problems with the Phantom being interpreted or coded as, say, neurodivergent, of being a person of color, of having a mental illness (on top of a physical disability), and so on. You can certainly argue too that many people who fall into those categories have been forbidden or at least found it difficult to have romantic relationships, as you consider, say, how people who are neurodivergent have difficulties socializing in ways considered acceptable by people who are neurotypical, how they and people who have physical disabilities, mental disabilities, etc. are often infantilized and seen as inherently non-sexual or asexual, the fact that miscegenation laws existed in the US up until the 1960s, and in the most extreme cases, the eugenics program and sterilization programs that specifically targeted those who were poor, disabled, or people of color.

Which is not to say that people who are LGBT+ have had it easier or something, simply that they are one of many groups who have found something relatable in the Phantom's story, and that interpreting the Phantom as such is just one of many ways of doing so, one of many ways of fandom interacting with a story in a way that includes their own personal experiences. I cannot tell you how many times I've seen people writing posts about how they personally see the Phantom as autistic, as having PTSD, about how the casting of actors of color in the role adds more to the Phantom's story, and so on, and I don't see why interpreting him as LGBT+ and/or queer is any different.

Potentially my only caveat about it is not assuming that this is intentional on the part of Leroux, ALW (ha), or any other creators - meaning that I doubt that they intended for the Phantom to be canonically a person or color, or to be neurodivergent, or LGBT+, and so on. This is mainly because I've seen people who have assumed so, and therefore attributed more, er, "wokeness" to creators than they may actually have had, and also because sometimes people will assume that their interpretations are now canon and will go after others who disagree. At the end of the day, these are interpretations, headcanons if you will, not canon - but that should not make them any less valid for you.

#GP gets asks #anonymous #cw ableism #cw racism #cw homophobia #cw transphobia #cw classism #let me know what else I need to tag bc this got pretty heavy

[chronic-cane]

Being a kid with undiagnosed ADHD was traumatic in its own way.

For context, my elementary school told my parents that I most likely had ADHD when I was 4. They just also gave misinformation and said that it can't be diagnosed until I was at least 7. So the adults around me knew, but I didn't. I didn't see a psychiatrist about it until I was 8, and by then my self esteem and view of my intelligence was non existent.

Mainly because I was obviously different, everything was incredibly difficult for me, but I didn't have an explanation. I would break down crying in frustration over homework assignments and was only met with more push to do them. My dad got frustrated constantly while studying with me. My other caregivers let it slip more than once that they thought it was too easy to not get.

And on top of taking over an hour for school given homework assignments, my babysitter would print out more worksheets to make sure I understood the material better. Children that age shouldn't spend over 20 minutes doing homework, all I wanted to do was go play like my little sister. On top of that they got me a tutor for the weekends that would be there for an hour.

"A little extra help" was never how I saw it as a kid, I saw it as punishment. I learned to hate myself for something that I couldn't control no matter how hard I tried. I was over exerted in kindergarten to the point of crying so many times and it kept going on like that until I was finally medicated.

And the only aids for developmental disorders at my school came in the form of an extra teacher who would hover around the kids or be put in completely separate classrooms. The abled kids were never given a proper explanation by the adults, so when a bunch of small children are learning social cues to an extreme level, those kids are immediately isolated. There was no extra time for assignments or easier assignments. So I never got any help that I needed even while on medication.

When you're a kid that's constantly bad at school, feeling like you'll never know anything sticks with you. And while I had trouble making friends and fitting in with my peers, the biggest struggle in public school as a child was the constant disappointment from parents and teachers as I pushed myself until I had a breakdown.

I still can never say with confidence that I'm smart. I hear it as a compliment and just don't believe it. When I mess something up because of ADHD symptoms that other people notice and I'm teased for it At All (I'm usually fine with getting teased for anything else) I'll fall into complete self hatred.

I've been working on it for years and I just hate that I was ever treated that way as a kid. I wish society allowed neurodivergent kids to be kids and didn't try to break them into something they can't be.

#rant #vent #adhd #add #adhd trauma #trauma

[anendoandfriendo]

Okay so like: seclusion rooms. Social isolation rooms. "SI" rooms. Whatever. Uhm. Right, yeah. Things as they are now are the epitome of "simplicity" for us and people who haven't been McFuckedUp don't necessarily get what that actually means.

So, things we were taught between second and fifth grade because if how fucked up the US education, psychiatric, and prison systems are, using only our time at Hillcrest Family Servcies and not including the stepmother, the mother (minus one example where it is about Hillcrest but took place at the home we were in at the time), our time at Unified Therapy, or the number of times we confronted the family once we got to university and/or moved out of [REDACTED]:

A Haitian kid schooled us about the fact not all Black people are African, actually. This was while we both sat amongst the walls of the very same place that traumatized our system as it existed at that time. And we like, didn't see her very often since, so while we didn't have the words for it, we definitely saw racism at work. Like. We hope she is doing okay now but we have our doubts/worries, especially since this was before 2015 at the most. Great thing to learn when you're an elementary/middle schooler, not a great context/situation to be learning the thing. She like, really didn't have an obligation to do that in any way yk? so we owe her a lot.

They. Really don't actually care about Disabled or Neurodivergent people, they're state-sanctioned abusers who will hide their abuse from the touring parents even for their day schools. And then on top of gaslighting the students, they'll gaslight the parents too! If our "bahaviors" like saying crap, interrupting the teacher, or even just having an opinion are not allowed, then everyone in these normal public schools should also be in these "day schools" because they're even worse than we were. We were like. Literal angels compared to some of these children, how about you start beating them up psychologically as well?

Speaking of angels, this place was pretty christian, which we cannot be surprised about. Arson would probably be a good answer to this problem (systemic abuse perpetuated by smiling, religious faces) but society somehow sees nothing wrong with the double standards. Please, lord, we need other people who agree with us that child abuse is not okay even if it is a Disabled or Neurodivergent child.

As it is related to Hillcrest and around the same time period: the cops took a visit to our house for a different reason, but there was A Discussion where we suggested calling Child Protection Services on them, too. They, supposedly, did not like Hillcrest Family Servcies either. So we asked them one word: why? They simply. Did not respond. One of them looked quite heartbroken but that really seems more like lipservice lol. "It's their job to respond to calls and enforce the law!!" you say — and we say that's bullshit. Anyone who holds significantly more power than the average human being, including the cops, is much more obligated to stand up to literal oppressors. They could simply walk away. If every single cop walked away and never helped Hillcrest Family Servcies perpetuate their abuse of children, even if the abuse was legal, then it would all be good! We care much less about the very miniscule possibility that things would turn into lawless chaos (as opposed to lawless order — ffs please use the word anarchy correctly if you're gonna use it) and much more about the fact you could actually be making the world a better place. In fact, protests generally depend on making things less convenient to promote a change. If the cops' job was to actually protect its citizens they would have walked out and never helped Hillcrest Family Servcies, ever, and reported them to CPS. Instead, they did the opposite of their supposed jobs, which reveals their true nature, we guess.

Fuck them and the eugenicist hate group they keep supporting. Autism Speaks is a hate group. If the abusers are supporting the eugenicists (or is anyone is supporting the eugenicists, even if they are not abusers) you should be taking a closer look at those people.

They never called it ABA, but it was ABA.

They never called it ABA, but it was ABA.

They never called it ABA, but it was ABA.

Abusing the identity out of Autistic children is applied behavioral analysis (ABA), also known as conversion therapy. Conversion therapy is not just for queer children, it is any abuse-based practice that is meant to abuse the identity out of someone.

#applied behavioral analysis #autism awareness #abuse #psychology #social justice #we think those are the tags with people that need to hear this? #cn // abuse #cn // applied behavioral analysis #conversion therapy #cn // conversion therapy #seclusion rooms #cn // seclusion rooms #cn // Hillcrest Family Servcies #Hillcrest Family Servcies #(we're tagging those on the VERY VERY IMPOSSIBLY SMALL CHANCES that someone else knows what we are talking about that sees this post) #cn // SI rooms #SI rooms #cn // social isolation rooms #social isolation rooms

[aemiruo]

2-04-24: Yesterday night I had an anxiety attack..

I am not going to help my English with translation so, if you are reading this, sorry for the misspelling.

I had a lot of thoughts on my head, most of it are bad.

To put some context, I am non binary, and I have been doing some papers and things to change my name, and also change my ID gender, which it only goes by M and F. In my country is not legal at all to use a X in the gender section, so it has to be done via legal and courts stuff.

That would not be a big problem is society could see me as I am, specially my family. They still ignore how actually hard is to live in my skin. They had no idea, they don't care. Why would they care? I don't ask for them to understand me, I just ask them to respect me.. Which sometimes, is quite hard. I stopped fighting with them for this, so we just continue living (barely to me) and they think everything is alright.

I feel my gender identity is like a joke to them, specially to my sister. For some time she respected my pronounces and such, then one day she become a total asshole and told me the most hurtful words that nobody ever told me, and become the side kick of my mom. My relationship with her is strange, I like her because she is my mom but I don't feel she likes me for being their child, I might be a rare thing to her. I am not like her first born son, and never will be like her perfect middle daughter. But she likes to know about my life by others, and my sister tell her everything she can found about me online. That's how their work. I have a bunch of secret social media thanks to old stalkers I had. Now my family is my own stalker.

But that is not everything. She insulted my partner, she insult me. My partner and I are neurodivergent and from the LGBT+ community, to be specific, under the Transgender umbrella. So we both know how hard is the world for us and the struggle to do everything and not be seen as we are. My sister said basically she understand us but we are not a big deal, we are not the center of the world, we are not special and such.

Oh Romina.. we know, more that you. We have been surviving until now. Neither you nor society and the government as well care a damn shit about people like me, people like us. You have no fucking idea, you understand nothing. We both are stronger than you would never be. You don't have identity/gender problems, you don't have to be hurt by everyone who misgender you because you will never be misgender. You are not hurt by our parents words because you are perfectly fine for them. You know nothing. You are an idiot.

Last Monday my mom asked me why I don't like to see my sister anymore, why we don't get along.

"Well, mom, you, dad, my bother, her partner, that sister, her partner and their dog are about to go to vacations together. Organized by her and she did not invited me. You should ask her about it"

The anxiety attack wasn't just for that, for the thought of that everybody should be better without my existence, but also for my lack of happiness when I work at my area. I wasn't enjoying art, I barely write now. I want to be happy with the things I like to do again. I want to change my name, I want to people respect me. But I'm invisible. I feel alone most of the time.

They went to vacations as the family they are, the perfect one. Do not take me wrong, I'm glad they had a happy time as a family. I know I'm not included at all in their plans anymore because is complicated to me to go out with me (besides my sister don't like me). Is hard to me to go out to places I donot feel comfortable, to be around people who are going to missgender me every second. They do not have any flaw anymore.

I'm working on my mental health, I'm taking medicine and other things that works.

Yesterday night, it just explode, everything I was feeling during the last 2 months.

I am better I want to belive. I'm with my partner and my cats. They bring me joy, happiness..

#ae's head mystery #long ass vent post

[lindwurmkai]

Thinking about the "how dare you humanise abusers" attitude that often pops up in response to a) discussions of fictional portrayals of abuse and b) generalised statements like "dehumanisation is never okay" (which those people object to on the basis that abusers exist and should, according to them, be dehumanised).

I never understood this before because I thought we were all discussing the actual question of whether talking about abusers in that way was beneficial. You know, to society as a whole. Or to victims of abuse in particular. But I just realised that's not what those people are doing.

To them, dehumanisation is simply a punishment. Describing abusers as complex human beings would be treating them more kindly than they deserve. Even fictional abusers don't deserve such kindness, no matter how many abuse survivors say they find nuanced portrayals more relatable. Or if you must make them seem human, at least punish them in some other way (preferably death) at the end of the story, right?

It's like when someone who normally identifies as an ally starts misgendering a trans person as punishment for (real or perceived) misdeeds. They don't think they're making a statement about trans people and misgendering in general, they don't think they're being transmisic, they're just doling out punishment. The trans person doesn't deserve to be treated "kindly" (respectfully) anymore in their eyes, so they're hitting them where it hurts.

Much like many of these so-called "allies" secretly never saw the trans person as their real gender to begin with, I bet many of the people who make a fuss about "humanisation of abusers" also have ... worse reasons for it than the most benign interpretation I am describing here. But I genuinely think a lot of people are simply trapped in the mindset that the person who abused them, abused their friend, or abused one of their family members deserves to be punished in any way you can think of and therefore ideas like "all people should be treated with respect" no longer apply to them.

But I'm not talking about what they do or don't deserve. I don't want to "humanise" abusers in order to be kind to them; I have at least 3 separate reasons for it that all come down to "it's better for society as a whole" in some way. For survivors, for the prevention of further abuse, and for neurodivergent people.

So we're over here discussing what we think would be best for all of us and someone comes in with, "You want to be nice to abusers???" No! That's not the point! But I think even if they understand that it's not our intention, they still feel like anyone who refuses to participate in this form of "punishment" is effectively being too kind. And anyone who fails to sound sufficiently vicious in their condemnation of abuse is automatically suspect, because any "normal human being" should be filled with rage at the thought of it.

I have never aspired to be anything close to a normal human being, but if you think I haven't felt that rage, you're wrong. I just don't feel the need to express it constantly regardless of context, and I don't think it makes sense to judge people based on whether they do.

Oh. It's DNI culture all over again, isn't it. If you hate something, you must wear a flashing neon sign on your forehead announcing it in order to signal to the other haters that you're safe to interact with because anyone who doesn't hate that group strongly enough to wear the sign could potentially be sympathetic towards them, right? Much like a writer who doesn't explicitly condemn all of their villain's actions. Ah.

#things are becoming increasingly clear #my sweet summer children..... #you think i'm not angry? that's cute #;

[bigskydreaming]

I still maintain that if the goal is absolute bad-ass Dick Grayson, the true route to that is not Talon Dick Grayson.

(Particularly because I do think there’s a lot of emphasis on this being an ‘upgrade’ to his competency when he’s historically had no problem nerfing the fuck out of Talons he goes up against, and its also like, it often creates the impression that Dick NEEDS Talon upgrades to be a truly intimidating member of the Batfam that can give any of his family pause, and I’m like.....he’s supposed to be top tier to begin with, and acting like he needs actual meta upgrades often counter-productively layers in the retroactive impression that he WASN’T top tier BEFORE he got the Talon/meta upgrades).

But anyway, as I’ve said before, if absolute bad-ass Dick Grayson is the primary end goal of Court of Owls related fics, the path to that IMO lies not in Talon Dick Grayson or the Court making him their Gray Son....its the Court TRYING to do that to his son (or like, being all progressive and like, we can go with a Gray Daughter, its 2021, its time, y’know?)

I mean, the second THAT happens, its like just stand back and watch Dick crash through their ranks like a human wrecking ball and being like NOOOOOPE, LMAO YOU TRIED IT BUT NOOOOOOPE. I WILL BE TAKING MY KID BACK NOW AND REDUCING YOU TO YOUR INDIVIDUAL COMPONENT MOLECULES IN THE PROCESS, PLZ AND THANK YOU.

Just saying. Dick’s always at his most bad-ass not in defense of himself or in reprisal for wrongs done to him (unfortunately, I mean, I wish we could see more of this but even in a lot of Talon fics that’s not really the aim of them, its more about showing his attempts at re-entering society post-Court than Dick being like, I’m going to enact unholy vengeance on your wannabe ornithological asses specifically in my own name because I’m a person and I resent your trying to de-person me, but like, the point still stands).

Nope, its Dick when in defense of 1) his loved ones, 2) innocents, 3) kids that we see him truly go feral, so like....if you want absolutely batshit feral Dick, you don’t need to make him a Talon, you need to point the Court at an innocent kid who is a loved one and like, just watch him go.

#because also lets be real Im never gonna let go of my State of Aggro and also Suspish about how often Talon fics insist #upon altering Dick's mental state and speech patterns and ability to interact with society with the same degree of competency he's always #had and saying oh thats just how canon Talons are when its actually really not and most canon Talons dont display any of those tendencies #and so there tend to be a lot of not great ableist assumptions/insistences made about how Dick is changed as a Talon #that would be FINE if they were meant as like....actual representation for certain kinds of disabilities or neurodivergencies #instead of just angst fodder that further emphasis Dick as now being Othered by his Talon-ness....which is expressed as a lot of coded #disability stuff instead of even just actual disabilities #also also the Grandmaster bullshit where Bruce or someone else HAS to give Dick orders or else he cant function #because he's been so thoroughly broken by the court that he simply cant exist autonomously/independently anymore #like yeah i know i know people love the angst but look Im just saying it might read differently if the fandom overall were different #but I simply dont trust popular fandom trends enough in the context of like.....what this fandom is like #enough to just give all Talon fics that use these tropes the benefit of the doubt and not see them as a way to justify/actualize #Dick being LITERALLY subject to the whims of the Batfam and reliant on like....them never using that at his expense or simply to prioritize #themselves and their wants over his....when like....thats LITERALLY what so many fandom trends and fics and headcanons #expect and want from Dick in regards to how he interacts with the rest of the fam in EVERY situation..... #like. its a tad convenient how much that plays into so many fandom trends that are usually at Dick's expense....enough so that #nah Im just not inclined to accept it on face value that in all of these cases - despite superficially seeming to do the exact same thing - #its somehow 'different' when Talon fics do it and its for Dick's benefit and to make his stories more interesting instead of just making #Dick more docile and compliant and effectively just....subservient to the rest of his family even while nominally being 'more badass' #anyway. idk. random tangent is random but also related #so in other words: #BUT I DIGRESS

[redfemblack]

What absolutely gets me is some trans activists (and a few conservatives too) trying to claim that detrans people, particularly detrans women, are being “used” and “brainwashed” by gender critical feminists. Do they not see how insulting, condescending and presumptuous and patronizing, it is to detrans women to infantilize them in this way, portraying them as stupid airheads who can’t think critically and for themselves?

If you actually listen to detrans people, both women AND men alike, without ideological blinders on, it’s clear that they gravitate towards being gender critical because of hostility from the trans community and radical feminism relating to their experiences. The trans community treats detransitioners the way a cult treats apostates, and now trans activists are trying to turn around and lament on what a shame it is that the evil terves got a hold on detransitioners? Mf, practice self-awareness and self-reflection. You treat these people like their mere EXISTENCE is an attack on yours.

And then, many dysphoric/desisted/detrans people are gender nonconforming and/or same-sex attracted females, a lot of them neurodivergent (autistic) too. This is because of the way in which society (mis)treats these groups of people and makes them believe they’re wrong for simply being themselves. Plenty of deeply sexist and homophobic parents would rather have a trans son than a butch daughter (and a trans daughter over a gay son) because they hate gender nonconformity, and many neurodivergent girls especially have “problems” conforming to the social dictates of femininity, which makes them feel uncomfortable as women. Radical feminism offers these people a clear and simple explanation for their feelings, putting their own personal experiences into a broader societal context: that gender is the problem, not the solution.

And to be clear, gender critical/radical feminists have some problems too and aren’t doing a perfect job in taking care of detrans women either. Shit like using dehumanizing rhetoric to refer to them (“mutilated”, “ruined”, “life destroyed”, etc) and being kinda tokenistic with them, just waving them around as political props without actually addressing their concerns. That’s what I see, I’m not detrans so I could be missing a lot, detrans women feel free to add. But compared to the other options, it’s little wonder why many of the most vocal detransitioners align with radical feminism in some capacity. Radical feminists are the ones willing to listen to and platform them, because the existence of detransitioners is very inconvenient to trans activists (“gender identity” might not be innate, people can be mistaken/confused, etc) and their real experiences are also very inconvenient to conservatives (gender stereotypes, misogyny and homophobia motivating transition).

And of course, it should go without saying that not all detrans people align with radical feminism — I’ve personally encountered detrans gender ideologues on both ends of the spectrum, both trans allies and conservatives. But the fact that many (apparently) do isn’t the result of grooming by ebil tervs or feminazi brainwashing, try listening to what said detrans women have to say for themselves instead of speaking down to them so disrespectfully.

I want EVERYONE to actually listen to detrans people first and foremost, as opposed to demonizing them as a hysterical hoax or dismissing them as collateral damage or denigrating them as stupid pathetic little sob stories or infantilizing them as brainless pawns.

#detrans awareness day #ftm detransition #detrans #dysphoric #Twitter #misogyny #feminism #feminist #gender critical #radical feminism #rad leaning #rad aligned #detransitioners #lesbian #gay #bi #lgb #lgbt #trans #transgender #trans ideology #gender identity critical #gender ideology #gender identity #internalized misogyny #terf #terfs #terfs interact #oc #rant