#but i did just buy a cow that makes strawberry milk

[the-daydream-archives]

Get to Know Me_Sims Edition

got tagged by @olya-occult-lover and @van-yangyin, thank you for the tags :D I have a tendency to ramble so this is gonna be a long text post so feel free to skip this if you don't feel like reading.

1. What’s your favorite sims death?

Ngl, I personally find death iffy when it comes to playing Sims since I get way too attached to my characters so much that I never get past Generation 2 while playing the game with the Aging off. xD The most bearable death in the game that's okay with me would have to be the Drowning Death Moodlet since it reminds me of the first Sims game. (tho even back then I'd rather take care of sims than kill them at all) Any time one of my sims gets a dying moodlet, I internally panic and make sure that they evade death by all means possible. (I ensured each of my played sims have death flowers in their inventories as well as those different items that make them immune to death)

2. Alpha or Maxis Match CC?

Both! I never understood the war between the two styles since they're both just CC to me. Basically, if I like something then I like it. Both have their unique characteristics and their flaws. No need to match it with the game since no matter what one does, your character will stick out anyway thanks to the custom content itself. That being said, I like both as long as they aren't unnecessarily high-poly.

3. Do you cheat when your sims gain weight?

Back when I was a kid I used to, thanks to my own personal challenge with body dysmorphia so I never had a healthy relationship with weight. Now older, I don't have a problem with it at all with my sims since I now know it's just a normal part of life.

4. Do you use move objects?

Of course! I doubt anyone would ever build without using that cheat. It's basically essential at this point.

5. Favorite mod?

Any mods from Gauntlet101010 and @baniduhaine :D I fell in love with Gauntlet's work through their Grim Reaper mods very early back then since no one else at the time catered to occults. And now, I really like baniduhaine's work since they also cater to a lot of things that occults really lack in-game (their occult bloodlines mods and plantsim mods are just <3 ) If you're a big fan of occults, please check out their work! They're really neat!

6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got?

I remember buying Cat and Dogs first if I remember correctly??? Not sure tbh at this point since it's been a long time. But at this point, I prefer other means asides from buying now. If you get it, you get it ;)

7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing?

aLive. I would liken it to how a reporter would say, "We're now live." Though I am unaware if there is a correct way of saying it in the first place. But if there is, feel free to enlighten me :)

8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made?

...this is a difficult question... it's like being asked which one's your favorite child. So how can I possibly choose? But since that is not at all the case, and hopefully my characters stay fictional it would be the rundown of the following in no particular order: Pancakes, Bacon, Hamburger, Chocolate Chip Cookie, Mixed Berry Milk, Ice Cream (Cone), Sugar Cookie, Cow's Milk, Bear Burger, Strawberry Shortcake, Goth Burger, and... *proceeds to list the rest of the Food Sims Series Cast*

9. Have you made a simself?

In recent years no. The last time I did was back when I used to play Sims 1. I was never fond of making real-life people. Characters, on the other hand...

10. What sim traits do you give yourself?

The main 3 traits I would give myself are the following: Creative, Perfectionist, and Geek. Extras that would be applicable are Dog-Lover, Family-Oriented, Socially-Awkward, and Foodie.

11. Which is your favorite EA hair color?

Whatever you call this hair color?? Also, I got carried away with editing so uhh, enjoy? (Yes in the photos are Pancakes and Chocolate Chip Cookie testing out the in-game hairs...and yes they do look quite cursed as blondes so I rather imagine them testing out wigs for a play or something.)

12. Favorite EA hair?

Despite its flaws in texture, it would be this hair from Dine Out. (It also quite suits Pancakes methinks.)

13. Favorite life stage?

Typically Young Adult. I also don't mind Teen, or Adult. And when I do make Elders, I kinda make sure they don't die lmao. I was never that attached to the kids, infants, or toddlers life stages unless they're the love child of my Sims.

14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay?

Despite its non-existence, I was originally there for the gameplay then I got into building. (But since I poured all my efforts into CAS these recent years, I've forgotten how to build now smh)

15. Are you a CC creator?

I am :) though I mainly specialize in headgear accessories. I find it a necessity nowadays to know how to create my own Custom Content as I'm never content with my sims unless I reach what I envision for them. Not to mention the lack of CC that caters to my personal tastes which makes it even harder to stay as a simmer that is only a gamer. I guess I could say that I became a creator solely out of necessity. Though that doesn't mean I don't enjoy the process of creating. On another note, maybe one of these days, I'll try learning how to make hair or clothing since there are still concepts there that I wish was available for Sims 4.

16. Do you have any simblr friends/a sim squad?

Do my mutuals count??? There are a handful out there that I am very fond of although we never had a proper conversation. Then there are those that I did talk to and I apologize for the experience of talking with me since I am not very good at socializing asides from comments. I wish I could talk to my mutuals more but I become too nervous conversing in real time that I sometimes just nope out of the conversation. If this happened while we're speaking, it's not you, it's most definitely me lol

17. What’s your favorite game?

What Remains of Edith Finch, The Stanley Parable, The Beginner's Guide, The Sims, Cube Escape & Rusty Lake Series. (I mainly stick to narrative-oriented games or point-and-click adventures)

18. Do you have any sims merch?

Nope, EA doesn't need any more money.

19. Do you have a YouTube for sims?

Nope. Though I do watch Sims Youtubers from time to time. (lxdice, Plumbella, itsqwertyluvs)

20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing?

It changed a lot. I won't say that my style got better or anything like that as that would do past me a disservice. I think it's fairer to say that my style got more fantasy-oriented when I began to understand the available CC resources that I had. My Before Simstyle is probably around 2017-2020 while my current sim style is now 2021-present. Ngl, if I ever get back into actually playing Sims 4, I'd probably use less CC similar to my sim style previously.

One is not better than the other, it's just heavily dependent on what mood I feel like when I create sims.

21. What’s your Origin ID?

Nope, don't want to share.

22. Who’s your favorite CC creator?

@moo2shelly (thank her for my love of foodcore CC, just sad that she's deactivated ), @vampirepill (again deactivated, I seem to have a recurring theme), and sims 4 haku at Twitter (again deactivated :') )

As for favorites that are currently active it would be @saruin. @skaays, and @gigglecoffin. (Hope you guys have a good day :) )

23. How long have you had a simblr?

I joined the Sims Community around 2020 I believe? Though at the time, I only stuck to the Sims 4 Studio Website. I think I've had this account since November of 2021 though I only started posting in January 2022. This account was only supposed to be a way for me to keep track of CC creators... I didn't expect to turn into a CC creator myself.

24. How do you edit your pictures?

I take photos using Geforce Experience while simultaneously using Reshade and CAS Lighting to achieve the best results. Then I go edit the photos in Photoshop or Canva. I also recommend using Nvidia Inspector to help fix the Graphics in Sims 4 to make it look better.

25. What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far?

Probably Cottage Living <3

26. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next?

Fairies, Circus/Clowns/Jesters, Bands, and PlantSims. (Especially that last one, please make it into an official occult.)

Tagging @westernraspberry @bnt0 @lunarspellsims <3 <3 <3 (If you guys are busy, feel free to skip this!)

And holy heck, this was long but I hope to those that made it this far that you enjoyed reading this :'D

#other #personal #simblr ask game

[theguyinthemathexamples]

Hihi!

the name's CakesInOil, aka theguyinthemathproblems, and i'm that one person in your fyp that takes nothing seriously and also the one that you'd realized has the mental capacity of a squirrel and a very very messed up, and an essentially non-existent sleep schedule the longer you get to know me :))

though, in all seriousness, i'm an ongoing genshin writer and yes, lowercase is intended whenever i write, excluding brainrots, drabbles, and possible future fanfics :DD

if you want to request anything, then go ahead :D

(more utc :]])

just note, tho, that the things I won't be doing are:

nsfw (which, yes, does include suggestive themes)

heavy themes of violence (angst ain't just my cup of coffee tbh, but i will try and experiment with it in the coming future),

anything,, yk, disgusting, which i won't be listing as i'm sure you know what i mean by what i said,

and overall ships that just spell "..why on god did he even allow people like you to exist here on earth??" and "i wonder how god hasn't smite you yet" for your entire mindset and existence.

and if you have any questions regarding my "do not request" limits, just dm me or send an ask. don't worry, i won't bite :))

if you don't want to send a request or an ask and just want to send something random, then go ahead, i won't mind :DD

A few things about me!

i may curse here and there but i'll try my best to tone it down a lot ^^""

i like to do little faces like :D, :), >:(, and etc. so that people can somewhat guess the sentence's context/intentions a little better :>

i'll wake up in the middle of the night and write random stuff that i would have no memory of doing (and tumblr will now have to hear every single end of it :))

i considered drabbles as brainrots bc i didn't know what it was called before

i'm under your bed :) /j

i use any type of pronouns (excluding neopronouns) but mostly use they/them to address myself :D

Custom tags :D

# collective reigning recipes ° : cake's everyday quotes (use them if u want lmao)

# fool's flour ° : cake talks/rambles about things that are mostly irl experiences

# sparkling wheat ♪ : cake talks/rambles about things that are related to fandoms, mostly containing content about genshin and hsr

# perilous eggs ° : cake answers asks/reqs/talks from anons or readers/viewers :>

# moonlit hens ♪ : cake answers asks/reqs/talks from their beloved moots :D

# obsidian-hard sugar ° : cake draws stuff :D

# "titan's wrath" frosting ° : cake... vents about stuff. *silently opens and closes vent on the floor*

# spoiled milk ° : cake spoils stuff, mostly about genshin and hsr

# sunlit cows ♪ : cake makes shitposts whether random or fandom related :)

Fic types :DD

# cherry waterfall * : cake makes a fic series

# scaled vanilla extracts ° : x reader fics

# suspiciously shiny mint chocolate ♪ : character x character fics maybe?

# gold coated cocoa powder ♪ : drabbles/short fics, might turn into cherry waterfalls if motivated enough

# silver lined strawberries ♪ : posts about/fics explaining aus, mostly from genshin and hsr

# stellar-borne cookies and cream ♪ : brainrots/headcannons that are more or less gonna turn into gold coated cocoa powder if braincells go boom boom big and loud enough

# sun-kissed sprinkles ♪ : cake reposts about stuff hehe >:]]

———————————

if i missed anything, don't hesitate to tell me about it :D

btw, yes, i will post very very very slowly, like even more slowly than a snail or tutrle bc i've unfortunately been very very busy as of late :((

"no no no no no BB by be in the na na na na BB I'll buy by by by" - my goofy ahh autocorrect, nov 15, 2022

#how do i tag lmao #send help #sagau #genshin writer #new writer here :) #watch me do a flip /hj #watch me post smth a few minutes/hours later after this lmao #genshin sagau #introducing myself #it is 3am #this is fine #intro post #made this just so i could reply to an ask 💞💞

[atopearth]

Norn9: Var Commons Part 1 - Kakeru Yuiga Route

To say I'm excited is an understatement. I've been wanting to play Norn9 ever since I watched the anime when it first came out. I knew the anime wasn't great but I loved the aesthetics and the ideas. Personally, I loved Koharu and Kakeru the most because they were cute so I'm starting off with them. Otherwise, three heroines and a bunch of LIs for each of them? I love whoever thought of that concept! They're all voiced too so this will be a delight! I feel like the mystery around Sorata and his memories was never addressed in the anime I think? Anyway, Koharu is a kind but weird girl I guess? Hahaha. I don't remember anything about the story and characters other than the vibes everyone gave off, so I am curious as to why Koharu can't recall her name. Otherwise, from her interaction with Sorata, I can see why I liked her. Maybe she saw a kindred spirit in Sorata since they both seem to not know much about themselves and this world but seeing her rather positive personality and just doing what she can facing forward makes me think she's very cool. Akito running away from the baby chicks was hilarious.

Lmao when Kakeru offered Koharu his last name because she couldn't remember her first or last name, that was so smooth hahaha. Hmm if they're espers tasked with missions to use their powers towards peace around the world, why did Koharu know she'll need to get on this ship and specifically at the age of 17? Koharu is so funny, I love how she assumed Masamune didn't want to tell them about The World because he actually knows nothing about it😂😂 The combo of Koharu and Sorata are hilarious, they're basically bullying Masamune, I died when Sorata said Masamune was in his 30s when he's in his 20s😂 Koharu worrying about others before herself is so sweet. Loved it when she didn't expect Akito to be good at cooking and she imagined him pissed off asking if she had a problem with that hahahaa. Senri is like an adorable wounded cat that refuses to get to know other people better because there's no point in the end. I can see why Kakeru would be so amused by Koharu, her priorities are definitely not what you expect haha, but it was cute how she was so focused on washing the peaches squeaky clean for others to eat. Lmao at Senri telling Masamune that he doesn't need to be watched because he'll just stay in his room hahaha. Kakeru messing with Koharu is so cute, especially when he made her think he's actually a girl.

Considering Akito has the same VA as Emiya Shirou, I guess it makes sense that he's good at cooking haha! I didn't think that the plants growing on the ship were grown by Kakeru and his powers and that everyone relies on it for food. It's funny how Kakeru was the one who got embarrassed for calling Koharu with his last name when he suggested it😂 Koharu saying she likes Kakeru with no romantic connotations was so cute, especially when Kakeru blushed. She just genuinely likes him as a person and enjoys his company and I just think that's cute. Gotta love Heishi's logic that since they're always out of milk after baths, he wants to buy a cow😂 Aww Koharu was so cute to try and joke that Kakeru can go in the bath with them, she's so innocent🫢 Kakeru helping Koharu learn how to grow a strawberry plant herself was really endearing. Seeing her try so hard and care so much about a plant really made me want to keep cheering her on and hope that everything goes well. It's actually sad how Koharu thinks she's greedy for wanting more things like being with Kakeru when it's such a natural thing to desire. I enjoyed their honest interaction with each other where Koharu told Kakeru she tried to be a lady because she thought she would be able to stay with him that way, and he told her about his earring and how his father was killed. I wonder if the traveler who visited Koharu was Kakeru's dad? A scary thing to think is that, what if Koharu's powers killed him?

I liked how Koharu logically told Masamune that she should take care of Kakeru because his job as the connection to the World is important and they need him to stay healthy, instead of just insisting that she wants to take care of him. I wonder if the hiyoko (baby chicks) being doctors and stuff will be something important later, especially since Sorata stays in their room now. Lmao at how spiteful Senri is for having to do Kakeru's work when he was sick😂 I wonder who took Kakeru's earring though? I was glad that Koharu could be honest and tell Kakeru to stop pretending to be happy when he's not, but he's a tough guy to crack open, which is understandable. My heart honestly broke for Kakeru when he expressed how he felt like he lost his sense of self without his earring, he sounded like he was choking up and that really hurt my heart. I quite liked how when all the heroines were sighing, you got to see who they were troubled over. I'm very curious about the match of Nanami and Ron. Lmao at Itsuki pretending to be a normal cat in the dream until Nanami tickled him, I like this interesting dream power he has though. It was hilarious how Koharu made Mikoto misinterpret Cinderella's story thinking that she attends a combat tournament rather than a ball😂 Is the Glum Hiyoko/Dwarf in Koharu's Snow White story Senri? Lmao at him being enticed by Koharu's offer when she said she'll run all the errands and he can stay in the cottage without needing to go out. I actually really enjoyed how Kakeru was the Poison Apple thinking that it's beautiful and nice on the outside but poisonous on the inside with all his thoughts, but in the end Koharu accepts everything about him and asks him to step by step reveal his true self to her bit by bit instead of forcing himself. The kiss was beautiful☺️ LMAO at Senri ruining the mood between Kakeru and Koharu, I wanted to see them embarrassingly discuss their dream!! It's actually quite funny how Kakeru pretends to be quite nice most of the time but he's openly frustrated with Senri hahaha. Legit died when the option to say cheer up to Kakeru popped up, like lmao the guy's telling you about his deepest insecurities and it's like, cheer up! I just found it so funny lol. Yayy they kissed in real life too!

Honestly, Koharu's powers are quite cliche with the whole she was considered so dangerous they basically banished her to live on a hill by herself. But I can't help but feel her story is heartwrenching because throughout this whole route, we see how utterly clueless she is about everyday things, and how much she wants to be friends with others and not be lonely anymore. You see her try her best working hard to be with people she wants to be with, and yet she was forced to show the "ugly" part of herself to the one she loves to protect him. All her insecurities, all her pain and all her sadness was forcefully exposed before she could even try telling Kakeru about it herself, I don't blame her for hiding herself in her room. Dangg, they slept together? Didn't expect that even though nothing was described or shown, just implied. It was nice to see them thank Koharu for protecting everyone and the ship with her powers, and it was really nice to see Sorata so worried about her since he's disappeared for most of this route haha. Well, a lot just happened all at once. Whether it be Mr Traveller/Shiro/Kakeru's dad's appearance, Natsuhiko's appearance, Ron seemingly chasing after Shiro, Kakeru possibly being an android that was mind controlled through his earring and it doesn't stop! What is Aion? What are everyone's goals?

I assume the Norn is the ship they're on and I guess 9 refers to the 9 people who belong on the ship with 3 outliers, whether that's the girls or some of the guys, who knows for now I guess. So The World is Aion. Does that mean Sorata came to this place, a Reset happened? Does a Reset erase everyone's memories? How do they even reset the whole world? Mikoto makes the judgement on whether to reset or not because her barrier powers is what protects humans whilst everything else is erased/reset? So I assume Mikoto's powers protects humans during the Reset, Koharu's powers are to destroy all civilisation, and Nanami reacted to memories so I assume her powers are related to erasing memories and giving people new harmless memories? If Aion has become too old and this is the last Reset she can do and there's been like five of them, is there any point really lol. War isn't something that will disappear just because you reset the world, you can't just expect things to go differently when you don't do anything to change it, merely resetting and doing the same things every time won't change anything. If the chance for all espers to arrive at The World is extremely low but they need all of them or at least the core ones like Mikoto and Kakeru to restore the greenery, then what's the point of the rest arriving and what happens if the Reset can't be done like now? Everyone just goes see ya later lol? I wonder why Shiro wants to go back to the year 2056, is that before the first Reset? 

I'm so glad that Heishi told them and Koharu that even though Kakeru's other actions were I guess “fake”, his feelings towards Koharu definitely weren't. Considering his powers, he was the only one that could really assure Koharu that it's right for her to believe in his feelings for her. Hehe, I loved how Akito said if Koharu's powers go crazy, he'll put it out with his water powers so she doesn't need to worry and should go along to save Kakeru. I think it's quite cute that after everything, Koharu returned to the place she lived at her whole life, but instead of being all alone, she's with Kakeru, recreating memories to make up for all the loneliness she must have felt. Honestly though, the story at the end was so haphazardly thrown together lol, like Shiro just randomly died??? I wanted to see proper interactions with him and Kakeru especially since it seems like Kakeru is his son but just brainwashed by him, which is still terrible. And Kakeru's deteriorating health worries me so hopefully he gets better with everyone surrounding him lol. Well, the tragic love ending sucked for everyone, not only did it seem like Nanami died protecting Ron, but Kakeru just gave Koharu to his dad and ditched her, that was sad.

Overall, Kakeru's route is pretty slow and simple, but not in a bad way I guess because I still enjoyed it. The story was definitely on the average side because nothing really happened plot-wise until the end, and even then we barely got anything. Otherwise, even though they never really elaborated on Kakeru's background properly, I think the route conveyed quite well how much Kakeru felt like a "fake" person that could only get out of his shell and feel like a real person after encountering Koharu because she keeps doing things he doesn't expect and he can't help but let go of his facade. I also liked how they both supported each other. She told Kakeru that he can be the real him and accepts all his weaknesses, and for Koharu, Kakeru was able to convey to her how important she is to him and how she's not any sort of menace or burden and that her powers aren't terrifying and evil. Seeing them grow a strawberry plant together, nursing the other back to health and just going through all the rollercoasters of emotions was satisfying despite the events being uneventful. I liked how fun the interactions were with Kakeru and the guys, especially Senri and it was super cute how Kakeru blushed when it came to Koharu doing something he didn't expect, so adorable. I would recommend Kakeru if you don't mind it being a bit slow and uneventful, because it was still worth it considering how cute they were trying their best to understand each other.

#norn9 #norn9 var commons

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

33 of 2022

FOOD SURVEY

1. What’s the last thing you ate?

Some soup.

2. What’s your favourite cheese?

Cheese from Bruges, this one.

3. What’s your favourite fish?

Codfish and salmon. I don’t eat meat, though.

4. What’s your favourite fruit?

Strawberry and cherry.

5. When, if ever, did you start liking olives?

Never. Olives are disgusting.

6. When, if ever, did you start liking beer?

At the age of 12 or something.

7. When, if ever, did you start liking shellfish?

Never. I must be a strange Belgian, not liking seafood. I only like these tiny grey shrimp.

8. What was the best thing your mum/dad/guardian used to make?

Rice pudding and oatmeal. My dad was cooking them himself for me when I was a little kid, and then also for my sister.

9. What’s the native specialty of your hometown?

I don’t think my hometown is known for anything particular.

10. What’s your comfort food?

Oatmeal and soups, no kidding.

11. What’s your favourite type of chocolate?

I’m not a big fan of chocolate in general, there’s too much of chocolate in this country.

12. How do you like your steak?

I don’t like steak at all.

13. How do you like your burger?

With no meat.

14. How do you like your eggs?

Scrambled or hard-boiled.

15. How do you like your potatoes?

As in fries. Typical.

16. How do you take your coffee?

With milk and sugar and it’s the only sweet thing I really like.

17. How do you take your tea?

I’m not a big fan of tea, but if I happen to drink one, it’s Earl Grey or fruit tea.

18. What’s your favourite mug?

The one I broke yesterday, but it’s just one of three favourite mugs of mine. One is black (I’m using it right now) and one is green.

19. What’s your biscuit or cookie of choice?

I wish I could say Speculoos, but I prefer soft gingerbread.

20. What’s your ideal breakfast?

Oatmeal with fruits, definitely cooked in whole milk because I don’t get the idea of skimmed milk. And some croissants would be nice as well.

21. What’s your ideal sandwich?

Cheese and lettuce and that’s it.

22. What’s your ideal pizza:

Lots of mushrooms and cheese.

23. What’s your ideal pie (sweet or savoury)?

Cherry pie, or apple pie with cinnamon, or rijstevlaai, it’s a kind of a rice pudding pie. They’re not as sweet.

24. What’s your ideal salad?

Any salad would go, I love salads.

25. What food do you always like to have in the fridge?

Cheese.

26. What food do you always like to have in the freezer?

Frozen veggies for soup.

27. What food do you always like to have in the cupboard?

Oat flakes for cooking oatmeal.

28. What spices can you not live without?

Pepper and Herbes de Provence.

29. What sauces can you not live without?

I can live without sauces, but I like my mayo on my fries.

30. Where do you buy most of your food?

Lidl.

31. How often do you go food shopping?

Every Saturday.

33. What’s the most expensive piece of kitchen equipment you own?

I don’t know, our pots and frying pans? A microwave? An airfryer? A waffle maker. We have them amm.

34. What’s the last piece of equipment you bought for your kitchen?

Some forms for cupcakes.

35. What piece of kitchen equipment could you not live without?

Microwave.

36. How many times a week/month do you cook from raw ingredients?

As often as possible.

37. What’s the last thing you cooked from raw ingredients?

A soup.

38. What meats have you eaten besides cow, pig and poultry?

Lamb, but it was long ago and I don’t even like meat.

39. What’s the last time you ate something that had fallen on the floor?

What? I’d never eat anything that’s been on the floor. My cats don’t mind, though.

40. What’s the last time you ate something you’d picked in the wild?

It’s illegal to pick wild things in Flanders.

41. Arrange the following in order of preference: Italian, Mexican, Chinese, Indian, Thai, Sushi.

Italian, sushi, Chinese, Mexican, Indian, Thai. Sorry to say that, but I hate Thai food.

42. Arrange the following in order of preference: Vodka, Whiskey, Brandy, Rum –

Rum, whiskey, brandy, vodka. I’m not allowed to drink strong alcohols, though. The medication I take affects the central nervous system.

43. Arrange the following in order of preference: Garlic, Basil, Caramel, Lime, Mint, Ginger, Aniseed –

Garlic, basil, aniseed, caramel, lime, mint, ginger.

44. Arrange the following in order of preference: Pineapple, Orange, Apple, Strawberry, Cherry, Watermelon, Banana.

Strawberry, cherry, orange, apple, banana, pineapple, watermelon. Again, I hate watermelons.

45. Bread and spread:

Yay. We do it often here.

46. What’s your fast food restaurant of choice, and what do you usually order?

I don’t like fast food. If ever, I’d go to Brussels and order in KFC because chicken is the only meat I sometimes eat, besides fish.

47. Pick a city. What are the best dining experiences you’ve had in that city?

Brussels and they served a really good waterzooi in the restaurant me and my friends have been to, even though the dish itself is native to Ghent.

48. What’s your choice of tipple at the end of a long day?

You mean alcoholic drinks? Beer or white wine.

49. What’s the next thing you’ll eat?

I don’t even know, I won’t be eating in long time today.

50. Are you hungry now?

Nope, I’m eating.

51. Do you eat your breakfast everyday?

Yes, for my medication.

52. At what time do you have breakfast?

Around 8:00, after taking my meds.

53. At what time do you have lunch?

At 12:00.

54. What do you have for lunch?

Whatever floats my boat. Sometimes it’s just a snack.

55. At what time do you have dinner?

At 18:00.

56. What do you have for dinner?

Probably a soup today.

57. Do you light candles during dinner?

What’s the point, actually?

58. How many chairs are there in your dining room and who sits in the main chair?

Six and there is no main chair lol.

59. Do you eat and drink using your right hand or the left one?

Right by must, I’m naturally left-handed, but my left hand has some damaged nerves. I’m trying to train it, though.

61. Mention the veggies that you like most:

Cauliflower, broccoli, carrot, green peas, bell pepper, onion, lettuce, cabbage. No particular order, except for cauliflower.

62. What fruit and vegetable do you like the least?

Cucumber, spinach and avocado. For fruits, watermelon, mango and all related things.

63. You like your fruit salad to have more:

Strawberries and blueberries.

64. You prefer your vegetable salad to contain more:

Lettuce.

65. What’s your favourite sandwich spread?

Egg salad. Yes we eat it on a sandwich.

66. What’s your favourite chocolate bar?

Snickers, if ever, because I don’t like sweets.

67. What’s your favourite dessert?

Rijstevlaai.

68. What’s your favourite drink?

100% fruit juices and vanilla flavoured coke.

69. What’s your favourite snack?

Fruits or veggies.

70. What’s your favourite bubble gum flavour?

Cherry or strawberry.

71. What’s your favourite ice cream flavour?

Vanilla.

72. What’s your favourite potato chip flavour?

I don’t eat crisps.

73. What’s your favourite soup?

Veggie soup, I love them all.

74. What’s your favourite pizza?

The one with cheese and mushrooms.

75. What’s your favourite type of dish?

Type of dish? I don’t get the question.

76. What food do you hate?

Most of meat.

77. What’s your favourite restaurant?

There are a few, can’t recall them by name now.

78. Do you eat homemade food, or food delivered from outside?

Both, actually. Depends on how busy or lazy I am.

80. Who cooks at home?

We both do.

81. What kind of diet (e.g. low-fat, high-fiber, high-carbohydrate, balanced diet etc.) do you have?

I don’t have a diet.

82. How do you keep yourself fit?

Doing a daily workout.

#survey #themed survey

[mimmixereblogs]

Ranting time ! The Bella Sara adventures

Guys, I've just been struck by a flash of nostalgia when I remembered how focused I was on Bella Sara when I was little.

[For those who don't know what the heck that is, it mainly was a collecting cards game (kinda like Pokémon, but less popular and just for the sake of collecting pretty horses drawings) featuring magical horses and scattered lore here and there in special descriptive cards. It also featured a website, and diverse merch as book expending the universe and your usual figurine/dolls sets]

In France, when I started getting into it (compulsively asking my parents to buy me cards and redeeming the codes on the dedicated website), it was already dying — no one else that I knew had ever heard even remotely of it ; it was around 2012-2015 I believe

All the news on the website were at least three years old and the maintenance of said website was getting messier by the days — I've even learnt recently by desperately trying to search for it again that it has definitely been shut down (even though I was able to get back to it -in a rather buggy state- only a year and a half prior, around 2020)

When I think about it now, it holds such a strong feeling of nostalgia, to an almost idealised point ; I remember the open world game where you could buy seeds and plant flowers in the dedicated little dirt or water or sand squares to heal the big tree of life (or smth, I don't really remember the name) the more you did so

You could personalise your character with hairstyle and clothes you gained or bought, and could change their colors with dyes you could also make or buy

And the quests given by horses who would give you cards when you gave them what they asked for! The Wildscape castle that I thought would be an entire new zone to explore but turned out to be a model to use as decoration for your farm. And the gigantic plant leading you in the sky (Jack and the beanstalk way) to a cloud area where there were bovos (floating cows) who could gave you strawberry or chocolate or regular milk

So much undiscovered secrets lied in every corner of it, deep in the dark forest with giant spiders, following the path leading to a cave where there were a witch standing close to her cauldron ... we could apparently put items in it, but I've never found out what

And that's only the open world— all the mini games scattered around the website!! How you could take care of a foal, and design rooms with objects you would gain by entering their card's code— the mahjong firework mini game! The pearl searching/fish gathering underwater mini game ! The one where you could draw an adventure for a 2D paper horse (this one was very glitchy but by far my favourite, I was trying so hard to make it work lmao)!

And, very importantly, the fact that you could take care of all the horses you had collected in cards — I always loved how water horses, pegasus and regular horses/unicorns had each their own type of stables

There are a lot of things I haven't even mentioned, and some of them which I barely remember — this is such a great part of my childhood which I've never had the opportunity to truly share with anyone on whom it had had the same impact, since I started going to social media places only a few years later

SO, if you too had a great time with the Bella Sara website, or the cards or the books in general, hit me up! I'd be more than glad to discuss it with you :D

#bella sara #horses #old internet #ranting #nostalgia #game nostalgia #internet nostalgia #bella sara cards #bella sara books #bella sara website

[wlntrsldler]

No Clue (Bucky Barnes Imagine)

PROMPT: Y/N and Bucky hate each other. Nobody knows why. Whenever someone asks, the pair just say, “I have my reasons.” Some think that something happened between them when Bucky was in hiding. Some think that Bucky did something to Y/N when he was the Winter Soldier. Some think that there’s no actual reason- they simply hate each other.

MASTERLIST

-

There was an ongoing bet in the Tower. What was the real reason as to why you and Bucky hate each other? The problem is, nobody really knew exactly why you two did. It was like an unspoken truth that you both kept to yourselves and promised to take to the grave. The only thing people knew about you two was that you knew each other before you both joined the team. But of course, everyone on the team had their own experience with Bucky and yourself, individually, more so terrible and potentially life-threatening experiences over a pleasant ones. 

“Can you not fight in front of the food?” Nat rolled her eyes, taking another spoonful of cereal to her mouth. “Your energy is upsetting me.”

“It’s not my fault Barnes doesn’t know how to say excuse me.”

“Who the fuck stops in the middle of the hallway?” Bucky hissed. “Like seriously? Who walks then just stops?”

“Who the fuck doesn’t look at where they’re going?”

“Again, your energy is upsetting me.” Nat said again, this time her tone harsher. “Stop bickering.”

“He started it.”

“Did not.”

“Did too.”

“Did no-”

“I give up.”Nat stood up, taking her bowl of cereal with her to her own room. 

Bucky stared at you from across the table, his eyes burning holes through your skull. His nostrils were flared and you could see exactly where the coffee stain hit his white shirt. “So you’re not even gonna apologize for spilling coffee on me?”

You didn’t mean to make him spill his coffee. He ran into you, not the other way around. “I didn’t do shit to you, Barnes.”

“You spilled my coffee on me!” He exclaimed, waving his arms up and down to emphasize the stained state of his shirt. “And it was hot too. It burned me.”

“That sucks.”

Bucky sighed, closing his eyes and rubbing his temples. “You’re such a bitch, Y/N.”

“Thanks.”

He shook his head one more time before picking up his half-empty coffee mug and walking out of the dining room. You giggled under your breath, loving the way you were able to piss him off with the smallest things. He was so fun to mess with.

You can’t lie. Sometimes you purposely did things just to piss him off. What can you say? It was funny. Bucky always reacted so dramatically whenever you were involved and it was more fun pushing his buttons than doing the paperwork you were meant to be doing. You had a way of getting under his skin. You were the only one that had that effect on him so naturally, you took advantage of it. 

Bucky’s skin got irritated by this one brand of dryer sheets. He’d break out in small patches of rashes and he would always end up having to go get medical ointment to calm his skin down. Bucky was shy as is, so him, a 100+ year old super-soldier, chunky and built, having to make himself as small as possible to go unnoticed to buy some ointment was the highlight of your long, long days as an Avenger. So of course, whenever you did the shopping, you made sure to pick up that exact brand just to make him take that humiliating trip.

He also hated Strawberry jam, stating that it was too sweet for his tastebuds. You’d joke about how he probably had diabetes because of his old age- to which he would reply with his own witty comment. Just to spite him, you always picked up Strawberry jam, even if you were a Grape jam lover yourself. He would curse you, irritated that he wasn’t able to have his PB&J sandwiches because of your practical joke. The man was attached to the snack, it was borderline unhealthy. 

But, as fate has it, he was also the only one who had that effect on you, too. Just as much as you bothered him, he bothered you. He would purposely embarrass you in front of important people and find ways to make your life just that bit harder so he could have the final laugh. 

You were the only one in the team who drank almond milk, not being able to stand the taste of regular cow milk, so whenever Steve went grocery shopping, he always made sure to buy you a carton for yourself. And low and behold, you would drag yourself out of bed at around 11AM to make yourself some breakfast and you’d find Bucky in the middle of the kitchen, a smirk on his stupid face while he drinks out of the carton of your almond milk. 

You’d start yelling at him, calling him an asshole, a dick, and just about every name in the book. Steve would come rushing in, worried at all the commotion just to walk away disappointed because you and Bucky would be arguing again. Steve would just slide you a $5 bill to buy yourself another carton of milk, just for the same thing to happen the next day. 

You and Bucky had a special relationship, indeed. And only the two of you understood it.

- 

“Sam,” You laughed, wiping the sweat off your forehead. “Give it up. I’m not telling you.”

“Come on, Y/N,” He whined, trailing behind you as you walked out of the training room. “I promise I won’t tell anyone.”

“I am not telling you why I hate Bucky.”

This was a phrase you grew to memorize. It seemed like everyday someone from the team would practically beg you to tell them exactly why you hated Bucky. You were sure that they also bothered Bucky with their annoyances after they bombarded you. Thankfully, Bucky was smart enough, shocking to you, to not tell them a thing either. The team was frustrated at your stubbornness, wanting nothing else but to know what lies behind the mutual hate and absolute resentment for one another. 

You bid Sam a farewell and walked to your room, ready to take a shower. You looked down at your bruised knee from a mission for one second, not realizing someone was in the middle of the hallway to your room. You looked up to apologize but your sympathetic smile quickly turned into a scowl when you realized who it was. Bucky. “Get out of my way.”

“It’s not fun when you’re on the other side, huh?” Bucky smirked, referring to your encounter in the morning. “Now imagine getting burned by scalding coffee with that too.”

“Did you seriously wait in the hallway just for me to bump into you?” You tried to shove past him. His hard chest made that difficult. His feet were planted on the ground he stood on, not showing any signs of leaving any time soon. “You don’t have anything better to do?”

“I just wanted to give you a taste of your own medicine.”

“Fuck off.”

“I actually had something to tell you, if you would just shut your pretty little mouth for one second and let me talk.” You could practically feel his smugness. It was dripping off his voice like sweet, poisonous honey. “We have that mission together tomorrow. Or did you forget?”

“I’m a professional, Barnes. I don’t forget.” You replied, you took a sip from your water bottle, nearly moaning at the refreshing feeling of the cold drink. “I don’t get why they choose to pair us up knowing we don’t like each other.”

He finally moved out of the way, leaning against the wall to let you pass. “They know we work well together.” 

That was true.

Despite the way you two were at each other’s throats all the time, no pair could ever accomplish a mission as efficiently and flawlessly as you and Bucky. You shrugged before walking away from him, disappearing into the dark hallway, but not before you raised a finger up in the air for him to see. 

And yes, it was that finger.

Bucky chuckled when he saw you raise your hand to flip him off. You were truly something. He was about to retreat to his own room for the night when Sam saw him, running towards him excitedly. Oh, great, Bucky thought, here we go again. 

“Buck nasty,” Sam started, cocking an eyebrow. “Will today be the day when you finally tell me the history between you and Y/N?”

“Not a chance, Wilson.”

“What the hell is wrong with the two of you?” Sam groaned, punching Bucky’s metal arm in absolute annoyance. “For two people who hate each other, you two seem to have a mutual trust pumping through your veins. You remain loyal to each other over the rest of the team.”

“What can I say? Me and Y/N are an unusual pair.”

“You two are the devil’s incarnates.”

Bucky just laughed at the comment, silently agreeing. There was something devilish about the way the two of you kept your secret between just the two of you. There was a rush, like you were in on a secret that would blow the team’s minds. Quite frankly, if they knew why the two of you despised each other, they would be shocked. Or maybe they wouldn���t. Sometimes Bucky thought that the reason was so obvious, basic even, but other times he laughed silently at the reactions the team might have upon finding out. Such a shame that he’ll never know if they’ll actually respond as he imagined because the team would never find out about the truth.

-

“Okay, now that they’re off on a mission, any updates?” Tony asked, looking around the room. 

It became a tradition in the tower to hold these meetings whenever you and Bucky were off to a mission. The team did their own individual research about your past lives and reported back to the team before you two got back home. Sure, maybe, it was a bit overboard for them to basically hold a town-hall meeting just to find out information that they truly had no business even looking into, but what were they meant to do? You and Bucky both had hard exteriors that nobody could ever crack. 

Even Steve, Bucky’s oldest pal, was left in the dark by his best friend. Every time Steve brought you up, Bucky would just get up and walk away. Even when they were in potentially dangerous situations, midst missions and all. 

There was a time when Bucky and Steve went to Russia to capture a HYDRA agent. They hid behind a shipping container for a few minutes to get some protection before running back into the field of gunfire. Steve thought that there was no way Bucky could avoid answering the question now. But he was mistaken.

“So Buck,” Steve started, checking the surroundings to make sure they were safe for the time being. “What’s the story between you and Y/N?”

Steve stared at Bucky long enough to see the brunette roll his eyes. Steve heard some shuffling behind him so he turned to look, only to find nothing. When he turned around to face Bucky, he had already emerged from behind the shipping container into the open space, blocking bullets with his arm. 

Steve sighed, “If you didn’t wanna answer, you could’ve just said that, Buck.”

Because of that story, the team understood just what great lengths the both of you would go through just to avoid answering the question. So since neither of you would ever give them the time of day, they had to do their own research.

“Nada for me,” Nat groaned, throwing a stack of papers that lead to a dead-end onto the coffee table. “It was like Y/N was a ghost story, just like the Winter Soldier.”

“Okay, whatever they’re hiding might just be the cause of the possible end of the world because this is just ridiculous.” Sam stated, throwing his hands up in defeat. “Why are they so adamant about not telling us why they hate each other?”

“Who knows?” Wanda chipped in, shrugging and returning her attention back to her phone. She was one of the few who completely gave up on trying to figure things out, following Steve. She accepted defeat, realizing that the two assassins simply did not like each other. It never bothered her personally so she let it go. “Why are we still trying to figure this out? It’s been months. I say we give it a rest.”

“I agree.” Steve replied, nodding towards Wanda’s direction. “It’s their business, guys.”

-

You leaned back on the back seat, chest rising up and down, a bead of sweat rolling off your temple. You shifted your leg to get more comfortable in the small space in the car. You looked over your shoulder to look at him, a smirk displayed on his face as his breathing mimicked yours. 

“You good?” You asked, giggling after catching your breath. 

“Perfect,” Bucky nodded, reaching over your waist to pull you closer to his body. “Always so good with you.”

You playfully shoved him off, starting to clean yourself up. You would never admit it to him but you always loved to relish these short, yet sweet, moments that you two shared. Your shirt was on the floor, next to his pants and your hair was in disarray. The windows were fogged and the car smelled distinctly of sex and fresh pine, the car freshener that Bucky picked up in the liquor store on the way home, knowing what will happen next as it always happened after every mission. You looked out the tinted window seeing the outline of the Avengers tower. “How long do you think it will take for them to finally realize we’re fucking?”

You felt him shrug behind your skin. “Who knows? I thought we’d only have to keep this up for a few weeks but it’s been a few months now and they still have no idea.”

“Some Avengers they are.”

Bucky laughed at your comment, leaning over to leave a quick peck on your lips. “Agreed.”

#Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes imagine #bucky fanfic #bucky barnes one shot #the avengers #the avengers imagine #marvel #marvel one shot #marvel imagine #winter soldier #winter soldier imagine #winter soldier one shot #sebastian stan #sebastian stan imagine

[surveysonfleek]

1617.

1. What’s the last thing you ate? turtle chips in choco churros flavour, a new fave!

2. What’s your favourite cheese? triple cream brie omg

3. What’s your favourite fish? raw salmon

4. What’s your favourite fruit? bananas

5. When, if ever, did you start liking olives? i hate olives

6. When, if ever, did you start liking beer? never lol. i dont mind fruity ciders though

7. When, if ever, did you start liking shellfish? i guess as a kid?

8. What was the best thing your mum/dad/guardian used to make? filipino food

9. What’s the native specialty of your hometown? we dont have anything great here haha

10. What’s your comfort food? a whopper. i know, its bad

11. What’s your favourite type of chocolate? i love lindt lindor

12. How do you like your steak? medium rare

13. How do you like your burger? a bit red in the middle and just the classic tomato, lettuce and onion with a bomb burger sauce

14. How do you like your eggs? scrambled

15. How do you like your potatoes? beer battered

16. How do you take your coffee? i love iced coffee

17. How do you take your tea? i prefer earl grey with a dash of milk and 1tsp of sugar

18. What’s your favourite mug? this cheap game of thrones one

19. What’s your biscuit or cookie of choice? subway cookies! particularly white choc and macadamia

20. What’s your ideal breakfast? a big breakfast - bacon, sausage, eggs,mushrooms, tomatoes and hash brown with a side of pancakes lol

21. What’s your ideal sandwich? tuna salad is good enough for me tbh

22. What’s your ideal pizza: meat lovers

23. What’s your ideal pie (sweet or savoury)? im happy with an apple pie from mcdonalds lol

24. What’s your ideal salad? greek salad

25. What food do you always like to have in the fridge? the usual haha

26. What food do you always like to have in the freezer? idk lol

27. What food do you always like to have in the cupboard? these questions are boring lol

28. What spices can you not live without? salt, pepper, galic and onion powder and of course all the usuals

29. What sauces can you not live without? tomato sauce and bbq sauce

30. Where do you buy most of your food? coles, woolies and aldi

31. How often do you go food shopping? every week

33. What’s the most expensive piece of kitchen equipment you own? fridge

34. What’s the last piece of equipment you bought for your kitchen? knives

35. What piece of kitchen equipment could you not live without? microwave or stove

36. How many times a week/month do you cook from raw ingredients? hmm maybe 4

37. What’s the last thing you cooked from raw ingredients? chicken curry

38. What meats have you eaten besides cow, pig and poultry? i’ve tried moose, turtle, lamb, crocodile, kangaroo

39. What’s the last time you ate something that had fallen on the floor? idr

40. What’s the last time you ate something you’d picked in the wild? haha this doesnt rly count but prob an avocado from our avocado tree

41. Arrange the following in order of preference: Italian, Mexican, Chinese, Indian, Thai, Sushi. sushi, chinese, italian, mexican, indian, thai

42. Arrange the following in order of preference: Vodka, Whiskey, Brandy, Rum. whiskey, rum, vodka, brandy

43. Arrange the following in order of preference: Garlic, Basil, Caramel, Lime, Mint, Ginger, Aniseed. garlic, caramel, basil, ginger, mint, lime, aniseed

44. Arrange the following in order of preference: Pineapple, Orange, Apple, Strawberry, Cherry, Watermelon, Banana. banana, watermelon, pineapple, orange, apple, strawberry, cherry

45. Bread and spread: nutella is my fave

46. What’s your fast food restaurant of choice, and what do you usually order? kfc, fried chicken and coleslaw

47. Pick a city. What are the best dining experiences you’ve had in that city? haha i couldnt choose

48. What’s your choice of tipple at the end of a long day? what

49. What’s the next thing you’ll eat? some sort of snack at work

50. Are you hungry now? no

51. Do you eat your breakfast everyday? nope

52. At what time do you have breakfast? maybe 7am if i have it

53. At what time do you have lunch? 11

54. What do you have for lunch? changes everyday

55. At what time do you have dinner? 7pm

56. What do you have for dinner? changes everyday

57. Do you light candles during dinner? no lol

58. How many chairs are there in your dining room and who sits in the main chair? 6 but we hardly ever have dinner together as a family lol

59. Do you eat and drink using your right hand or the left one? right

61. Mention the veggies that you like most: i legit like all veggies

62. What fruit and vegetable do you like the least? any sour fruits

63. You like your fruit salad to have more: rockmelon

64. You prefer your vegetable salad to contain more: avocado

65. What’s your favourite sandwich spread? nutella

66. What’s your favourite chocolate bar? kitkat or malteasers

67. What’s your favourite dessert? waffles

68. What’s your favourite drink? vanilla coke

69. What’s your favourite snack? idk lol

70. What’s your favourite bubble gum flavour? spearmint

71. What’s your favourite ice cream flavour? hazelnut

72. What’s your favourite potato chip flavour? salt and vinegar

73. What’s your favourite soup? clam chowder

74. What’s your favourite pizza? meat lovers

75. What’s your favourite type of dish? a hearty meal

76. What food do you hate? spicy food

77. What’s your favourite restaurant? theres way too many to name

78. Do you eat homemade food, or food delivered from outside? both

80. Who cooks at home? we all take turns

81. What kind of diet (e.g. low-fat, high-fiber, high-carbohydrate, balanced diet etc.) do you have? i dont follow one

82. How do you keep yourself fit? minimal exercise lol

#survey #surveys #quiz #bored #questions

[super-haikyuu-hotline]

idk if u wanted to write it again (i saw it on ur bnha blog anf it was glorious), but a cute rainy day scene with iwa-chan and kags (separate!!) pls and thank you! i love hq so i was super happy that u were doing a hq blog too (:

I’m always happy to write rainy day fluff because of the sharing of umbrellas! ʘ‿ʘ I think sharing an umbrella with someone, especially when the umbrella is too small for two but a little too big for one, is super cute! So no worries heheh. I loved writing the BnHA one, so I’m so happy you liked it heheh. (ღ˘⌣˘ღ)

Thanks for sending this in! I hope you like it! ^̮^

Iwaizumi Hajime

The weather forecast for today was wrong.

As his homeroom teacher continued with his talk on university applications, Iwaizumi found his mind wandering a little when he caught sight of the quickly darkening afternoon sky. His gaze flitted to you, sitting on the other side of the classroom, and he briefly questioned if you had brought your umbrella against the assurances of the weather forecast on the morning news. Or you might’ve intended to bring one but forgot, as you normally did. He put a hand up to his face to mask his laugh with him loudly clearing his throat. You were always a little clumsy about small details.

The teacher tapped a marker on his desk as he spoke, and the sound brought Iwaizumi out of his thoughts and back to the talk at hand. University applications and all the topics surrounding it were the only things on his mind, until after the teacher had dismissed the class and everyone was abuzz with talking about the future.

Iwaizumi busied himself with packing his bag, looking up every now and then to bid goodbye to the classmates who were filing out of the classroom in groups and the odd couple. His phone lit up with the notification that he’d received some texts from Oikawa, which he pointedly ignored when he realised that you were looking at him.

How long have you been staring?

The back of his neck suddenly felt uncharacteristically hot, but he shoved the creeping heat to the back of his mind and asked you if you needed anything from him.

Iwaizumi definitely didn’t expect to say that you did, in fact, need something.

“Would you maybe walk with me to the station, Iwaizumi-kun?” you asked, your voice not quite carrying to the corner of the classroom where he sat with the pitter-patter of the rain outside.

He pulled his umbrella out and then walked over to your desk, placing it in your hands. “You can return it to me tomorrow,” he said, making eye contact by force of habit and then regretting it as soon as he felt even his ears grow warm. The fact that you were close enough to tell that his ears were getting red only made the feeling worsen.

You slid his umbrella across your desk to the edge of it where his hand was resting but he didn’t realise it until now. “No, I can’t do that. It’s your umbrella. I’ll just go on without–” 

“You take it, Y/N-san. I can handle a little rain,” he said.

You made a show of turning your head to look at the rain for a few seconds before turning back to him with a defiant expression that he recognised and barely tolerated on Oikawa’s face. It somehow looked alright to him on yours. 

“That’s hardly a little rain though. How about we share? I promise I won’t take up much space under your umbrella,” you said.

Iwaizumi was a fool to agree so quickly, not quite understanding how small his umbrella was until you were pressed to his shoulder under it. But he was a happy fool for the chance to have a nice conversation with you in the privacy of his too-small umbrella and the steady thrumming of the rain falling like a curtain around the two of you.

Kageyama Tobio

It was only when he found himself in front of the vending machine that he realised that he had no idea what your favourite drink was from this particular machine. 

Kageyama let his fingers hover over the buttons one by one, trying to visualise you holding each of them and working out from there if this was a drink that you liked. A strawberry-flavoured milk in the last row of drinks caught his eye, and he immediately put in the amount of change needed for it. Girls liked strawberry-flavoured things, probably. Because it was sweet and pink. There was a funny-looking cow with pink patches on the front too.

The drink came hurtling down with a thud, and he grabbed it, and then remembered not to hold it too tightly so it’ll stay cold for longer. 

Kageyama could feel his palm start to sweat around the drink he’d bought for you, and he instantly regretted buying it too soon. What if you weren’t done with cleaning up after club activities when he got there? The drink would’ve warmed to nearly room temperature from the heat of his hand by then. There was hardly any point in drinking something that was neither hot nor cold in the summer, was there?

There was the sound of trainers squeaking against freshly cleaned gym floors, and he was assured that he had arrived right on time. Angry clouds rumbled overhead, but Kageyama was too busy passing the already not-cold drink from hand to hand.

“Y/N,” he said, when you emerged from behind the gym doors.

Your face immediately lit up with a smile when you saw him waiting for you, and the sight caused a weird feeling akin to his heart somersaulting in his chest. He felt sick but it was a good kind of sick. Kageyama almost missed it when you called his name.

“Here!” 

He shoved the drink unceremoniously into your shoulder. You took it and stuck the straw in, taking a big gulp. “Ah, that’s good stuff. Thanks, Tobio-kun,” you said.

What should he talk to you about?! Kageyama wanted to open his mouth and ask you about your day, but every time he tried, he ended up having to fake a cough from not being able to find the words.

“Oh, it looks like it’s about to rain.”

Your words snapped him out of his argument with himself, and his eyes followed the invisible line from your fingers to the dark clouds.

Shit.

“What was that?” you asked.

He cleared his throat before saying it louder, “… I don’t have my umbrella.”

You grabbed your umbrella seemingly from the air, and twirled in your free hand. “That’s okay! We can share. It’s good that we’re neighbours, isn’t it?”

Kageyama wanted to thank you for the offer and accept it. He also wanted to tell you that living in the house two streets over from his own house hardly counted as being neighbours. But he did neither. He cleared his throat again, for no particular reason other than his nerves that were definitely doing him more harm than good.

Instead, he tried with “N-Nice. Thanks.” 

It was one of few things he managed to say to you on the long walk home under your embarrassing otaku umbrella that had anime guys printed all over it.

#hq!! #haikyuu!! #haikyuu!! imagines #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #iwaizumi hajime #iwaizumi hajime x reader #kageyama tobio #kageyama tobio x reader #scenario #fluff #i love umbrella sharing! #it's so cute #though #i suppose it's not too practical heheh

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #337

“if i showed you my soul, would you cover your eyes?”

What's your favorite brand of chips? I like Lays best. Are you a good painter? My Painting teacher when I was in college last said I did wonderfully, but I definitely beg to differ. Before buying a car, do you usually test drive it? N/A Have you ever written a poem and then read it aloud? No, but a teacher has. It was so fucking awkward; it was very pacifist, the topic being about war, and it had some depressing tones of death; there was just silence at the end of it, and I still don't know if it was shock or "what the fuck, she's messed up." There was this one guy that went, "Nobody is going to clap at that?", though, which I thought was pretty nice and reassuring. Do you like pineapple? Yeah, I do. Have you ever met your favorite author? I don't have a favorite author. Have you and your best friend ever liked the same person? No. Do you have any freckles? Not on my face (though oddly enough, I did as a kid?), but on random parts of my body. How many different languages can you say goodbye in? English, German, and then Spanish. Do you like or hate the smell of fish? I hate it. Have you ever been to Sea World? As a child, yes. I'd never go as an adult. Do you know someone who suffers from short-term memory loss? I don't know how this is actually diagnosed, but my memory is absolutely fucking nightmarish, almost exclusively in short-term situations. I can remember the most obscure events from my childhood, but not what I said to you five seconds prior. I'm rather sure my medications have made it worse over time. Have you ever read any of John Green's books? I got like, one chapter or less into The Fault in Our Stars before the book got replaced with the Wings of Fire series, so I never finished it. Are you a protective person? I'm an immensely protective person over those that matter to me. Have you ever experienced an earthquake? No, thankfully. I'm terrified of earthquakes. What's one thing that makes everything in life worthwhile? The fact that to our proven knowledge, this is the only one we'll ever experience. What type of waffles do you like? (Plain, blueberry etc..) I prefer plain, but I can eat chocolate chip ones as well as blueberry and strawberry. Have you ever seen the show Wife Swap? Yeah, I actually quite like it. Do you like chicken or beef better? Or do you not eat meat? Chicken, I think. I eat meat, but wish I didn't. What brand of dish soap do you use? Dawn, usually. Do any of your neighbors have dogs? Yes, and they never shut up. Do you believe in fortune tellers? They're money-driver bullshitters. Have you ever been to one? No, and judging by the fervor in the above question, I hope you can tell I never would do so and thus monetarily support them. Do you like regular or chocolate milk better? Chocolate, of course. But I love normal milk, too. Once again, wish I didn't, though. Forcing a cow to constantly reproduce to lactate is pretty fucking cruel. Growing up, did you listen to country music? I actually did. Do you normally wash your hands in warm or cold water? If it's just a quick wash, it's usually cold because our water takes quite a few moments to warm up. However, if I'm looking to thoroughly wash my hands, it's gotta be relatively hot. Do you believe in mediums? I see them in a worse light than I do fortune tellers, so... Like sure, manipulate grieving people for profit, sounds great. Have you ever been to one? Obviously not. Have you ever dated someone on the football team? No. Do you have a gazebo at your house? No. Do you like tomatoes? Solely when straight from a garden and on a bacon and mayonnaise sandwich. Otherwise I am noooot a fan. Are you a competitive person? Not very, but there's a tiny spark in me, really when it just comes to photography. I hate it. Google or Bing? Does literally anyone use Bing? What's your favorite brand of bottled water? Essentia. Do you have any ceramic animals in your house or outside? Ummm I don't think so. Have you ever given someone flowers? Yes. What is something you might eat with a hamburger? Fries or mac and cheese. What is a sport that you’ve always wanted to play, but never got a chance to. None. What is a fruit that you might eat in the morning? A banana. Who might you send a selfie to? I don't send selfies to anyone. About how many pages is the longest book you’ve ever read? I THINK it surpassed 1,000? At least in the high hundreds. Who would you call first after getting engaged to tell them the news? Probably Mom. Around what time do you start feeling tired enough to go to sleep? Truth be told, it's usually arouund 7-8. I rarely make it to 9:00 nowadays. What trends do you refuse to give in to? I don't even know what's trendy right now. What subjects in history interest you most? As dark as it is, I find the Holocaust interesting to learn about. Are you superstitious in any way? No. How do you get rid of anxiety? What a relevant question, being in a partial hospitalization program right now. Coping skills that help me are doing deep breathing, mindfulness exercises, and a little jerk back to reality is splashing freezing cold water on my face. It also helps to talk it out with somebody, just get my feelings into words. Then if it's a true anxiety or panic attack, I have my "emergency" anxiety prescription. Are there any items of jewelry you never/rarely take off? My lip and tragus piercings never do, and I always wear two rings. Do you find yourself correcting people’s grammar often? Not really, no. It just seems rude and snobby to me, honestly, if it's not in an educational setting, like helping someone with an essay. Correcting someone in your average conversation is just... unnecessary, imo. Now if you're talking like in surveys and stuff, I definitely do in questions and such, but I don't point it out. Gummi worms: Yay or nay? Yay, love 'em. What do you do when you have ‘me time’? I only ever have "me" time, so what I always do... Do you lack common sense sometimes? I have a horrible lack of common sense, shit's embarrassing. Have you ever poured glue on your hand just to peel it off for fun? No. How do babies make you feel? "Nervous. They’re so damn breakable." <<<< Mood. Would you/Have you milked a cow? No, and I'm not interested. What really gives you the creeps? #!: seeing a baby move inside its mother's stomach. It will actually make me scream and/or cry because it just grosses me the fuck out. Whale sharks' mouths also creep me out big time. Do you ever eat leftover pizza cold? Yeah, I love cold pizza. When you're wanting a midnight snack, what do you normally get? We normally have cashew bars that I like if I'm really hungry. Which cartoon character would you want to keep as a pet? Obviously Pikachu. My niece loves Pikachu anyway, so she'd be ecstatic to see a real one. Or well, maybe I'd go for an Eevee. Not as dangerous with electricity and all but just as cute and small. Do you like marshmallows? Yeah. If you had the opportunity to live forever, would you take it? No. It would ruin so many factors of the temporary nature of life. Things would lose meaning, get old and boring, it'd be much easier to take advantage of things... There are many reasons why I have no desire to live forever. Hell, I even wonder if I want an afterlife for those same reasons. Did you ever really believe in Santa Claus? As a little kid, yeah. Do you like quesadillas? I like cheese, chicken, and shrimp ones. What's the greatest/most influential song you've ever heard? Ozzy's "Life Won't Wait." Do you prefer to pull off band-aids slowly or quickly? I tend to do it slowly. What was the last thing someone told you that had you at a loss for words? Uhhh I feel like Sara said something, but I don't remember what. What was the last health scare you had? Ugh... I'm kind of living in one now. As my legs have been worsening, I'm becoming increasingly concerned I'm eventually going to need a wheelchair for "walking" longer distances. And mind you, "long" for me is probably short for the average person. My knees do nothing but crack incessantly and burn when I use them, and they frequently feel like they're going to give way, and in a few rare instances, have. It's my own fucking fault for not sucking it up and exercising with my mom in the room, so I'd like to move on. What is your favorite filling for a piece of chocolate? Caramel. Do you enjoy the sound of birds chirping? I do. If applicable, what’s your favorite drug, and why? I don't do drugs, so. What was the last TV show you binge-watched? Avatar: The Last Airbender with Sara. Would you rather eat burgers or tacos? Definitely burgers. I don't like tacos. Did your mother change her maiden name when/if she got marred? Yes. What was the last job you applied for? Did you get the job? Deli worker, and yes. Do you use TikTok? No. What decorations do you have in your bathroom? None. Our bathroom is pretty small. Well, the one we use, anyway. The one attached to the master's bedroom isn't cleaned up yet, but we'll use it in case of emergency. What year was your favourite band formed? (Before people think I'm smart, no, I looked the dates up, haha.) Well Ozzy was Black Sabbath's vocalist, and the band formed in 1968, but Ozzy became a solo artist in 1979. What's your favourite fruit? Strawberries. Have you ever had an out-of-body experience? No. Do you prefer gory horror films or the psychological ones? I prefer psychological. Are you easily paranoid? Yeah. Do you have a favorite obsession? Meerkats and Mark are kinda tied, haha. Are you a workaholic? No. Have you ever given a tattoo before and would you like to? No and no; that would be an awful idea, given I have bad tremors in my hands. Have you ever seen the movie Labyrinth? I actually have not. Would you rather be called pretty or hot? Pretty. Have you ever gotten a serious injury at school? What happened? No. Have you ever performed in front of my large group of people? Yes; I was a dancer for many years. Have you ever fundraised? If so, what for? You know how Facebook recommends making fundraisers for a charity of your choice for your birthday? I've done that for the Trevor Project and two charities for ovarian and pancreatic cancers. Are you wearing earrings right now? Ugh, no, even though I want to be. The first holes in my ears are just too stretched for normal earrings because I wore heavy ones too often, and I just don't have nice earrings. I still want to get very small gauges to put in the stretched holes. Name a singer whose voice makes you swoon? Fall Out Boy's Patrick Stump can do that, holy shit. "America's Suitehearts" does it for me, man. Y'know, when his voice goes all deep. Do your pets follow you when you walk around the house? My cat Roman is quite literally my shadow. Where I go, he goes. What do you do online? I seem to only exist online, really, so I've got a lot on my plate to choose from, yet I'm still bored half the time, haha. I'm essentially always watching or listening to YouTube, I play World of Warcraft for varying amounts of time depending on the day, I scroll through deviantART, check KM periodically, do surveys obviously, "work" at the wikis I contribute to, wander around on Facebook... idk, that's all I really do at least semi-regularly online. Haha oh, wait, I also check Craigslist like... every day for tarantula and hognoses even though I can't currently get either. Let me dream. Do you have any scars on your face? I have a couple on my chin from when I fainted and busted it open. What countries were your grandparents born in? In the US. What was the most damaging relationship (romantic or not) that you’ve ever been a part of? Ultimately, with Jason, because of how it ended. The relationship itself wasn't at all damaging to me, but the breakup shook my entire fucking world. When in your life was your self-esteem at its lowest point? Self-esteem? Now. I'm very unhappy with my weight going back up, my body is just in poor health in general, I'm not employed, not in school... I just feel like a lowlife. Who was the last person you cut out of your life? Do you regret it? I want to say my sister's mother-in-law. Sure don't, considering she revealed her disgusting support for conversion therapy. I'm civil around her in person, but I kicked that woman off my Facebook so fucking quick when I saw that shit. Who is the most attractive person you know personally? That I know personally... I would say Alon, but I haven't seen even a picture of her in forever. Summer, though, shares selfies frequently, and by god is she gorgeous. I know a lot a lot of beautiful women, asldkjf;awe. It's funny that I'm blanking on men, at least involving people I still "know"/are somehow present in my life. Would you rather look older or younger than you are? I'm fine looking my age. Have you ever dated someone who was very vastly different from your “type”? No. What is the biggest project you’re currently working on? I suppose you can count an RP plot as a "project." I'm procrastinating so bad on it because it is going to be A LOT of writing. Is there a person from your past that you wonder about frequently? Who? Take a shot in the dark for me. Who knows you best, excluding romantic partners? My mother. What are your thoughts on human creation? I believe we evolved. How many people have you had sex with? One. Have you ever had a yard sale? Yeah. Have you ever been surfing? No.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''voices'' by motionless in white

[collecting-stories]

Enchanted - Crutchie Morris

A/N: canon-era newsies fic. Based on AKB’s Crutchie cause he’s too cute. 

///

There was no denying that Crutchie, with his strawberry-blond hair and effervescent smile, was a sight to behold. The last bit of light illuminating a room through a window and warming anyone who stood in its path. Perhaps a little blinding at first glance but nevertheless beautiful and welcomed amidst the gloom of everyday life in New York. A vast and overpowering city, it was want to make you miss the farm you’d worked on before this but Crutchie made it a little more bearable, even if you only saw him briefly as you grabbed the paper and groceries for your employers.  

“I really am starting to get used to the market,” you mentioned, bright and early as you skimmed the front page of the paper you were sure to purchase.  

“I can’t believe theys don’t have ‘em up north.” Crutchie replied, sparing a smile for a lady that was passing. She slowed and he waved a paper in her direction, seeming to reel her in with it the way one might reel in a fish.  

“I’m sure they do but there’s no need for them where I lived, didn’t make a lick of sense to be selling eggs to people who can already buy eggs. Not even milk delivery came ‘round.” You confided as you finally pulled a nickel from your coin purse.  

“That’s too much,” Crutchie insisted, as he always did.  

In truth it did cut into your income to pay him a full nickel or dime instead of the penny it cost for the paper but you weren’t bother led by it. The family you were in service to now boarded you in their home and you had no one to send your income to so it was solely yours.  

“It’s a tip,” you insisted right back, “your smile is like the sun on a winter day Crutchie.”  

Crutchie flushed a red so deep it looked threatened to match the beets in your basket. It dusted his ears and his freckles disappeared completely.  

“Yous got a way wit words.”  

“I’ll see you tomorrow Crutchie.” You promised,  tucking the paper under your arm and heading in the direction of your house.  

You looked nice enough, plain of dress but he didn’t think anything of it. You had never said you were in service to the household where you lived only that you lived on Poplar street and Crutchie knew it to be richer folk. Not the Katherine Pulitzers of the world, surely, but richer than Davey’s family by leaps and bounds. All you had told him was that you had moved here from up north. You regaled him with tales of the white winters and the beautiful summers in the farming community. The woods and the vast amounts of green pastures everywhere. It sounded like a fairytale, a place too good to be true, like Jack’s Santa Fe. Why should anyone trade such an ideal for the overcrowded streets of New York? He was want to ask but it knew it wasn’t his place. He didn’t know you like that.  

Crutchie has met you the first time you’d gone to the market, walking home frustrated and completely lost, you’d flagged the newsie and asked directions. He’d been hooked ever since. Jack told him that he gave too much of himself to others and that he ought to be careful.  

“Tread lightly.” Were his exact words.  

But Crutchie couldn’t be bothered listening. He was sitting up late at night scrubbing stains out of his vest that had been there since it was sewn. There was no convincing him to go about things slowly.  

“Extra! Extra! Gold found in New York!” Crutchie shouted, waving his arm as he held the paper up. Down the street he could hear Racetrack shouting about a baby born with two heads. Impossible but Racetrack was just sure enough of himself to convince a person it might be true.  

“Least gold makes sense, all those folks moving to the gold towns out west.” Crutchie had joked earlier that morning as he split a stale bagel with his housemate.  

“Theys ain’t stupid, New York ain’t got nothing but rats and garbage.”

“But theys supposed ta believe a baby wit two heads?”  

“I can’t argue wit the people Crutch. They like crazy stories.” Racetrack replied, stuffing the rest of the bagel in his mouth and swallowing it down with water.  

“Just don’t go spreading ya stories on my corner. I’ll have ta soak ya.” Crutchie teased, pretending to whack his friend with his crutch.  

Race was far enough away that he wasn’t pulling any business from Crutchie but he could still hear the over-sensationalised story being advertised to the folks of New York. Both boys would age of the lodge, and of newsie work, soon and they’d been talking about splitting rent with Finch and Mush somewhere near by. There were more than a couple tenement buildings around and Finch had already gotten a second job running machines at a factory near the Hudson. But before Crutchie threw in the towel on being a newsie he wanted to see where his chances sat with you. If he wasn’t hawking papers every morning you’d have no reason to see him, unless you wanted to.  

That was the thing that Jack was warning caution with. Asking you out, confessing his feelings, it was all nice in theory but you had better prospects than a homeless newsie, especially one depended on a crutch.  

“Crutchie!”  

He sold off another paper and pocketed the penny before spinning himself to see you walking his way, waving as you got closer. You waved the way people waved ships out of the harbour, excited and joyful.  

“Here for the pape?” He asked, already pulling one out.  

“I am, I heard a story about a baby born with two heads but I suspect he was lying.” You announced, “what’s yours say?”  

“I’s got gold in New York,” Crutchie offered, handing over the paper that did indeed speak of gold-fever outside the city.  

“Golds tricky business. If it’s there it’s good but if it’s not...” you trailed off, your usual smile faltering just a bit as you took the paper from him.  

“Ya ever seen any?”  

“No, can’t say I have.” You perused the paper as usual, reading through the front page as Crutchie continued to sell.  

“Before ya head off,” Crutchie began to say, drawing your attention away from the paper. “I’s wondered if I could escort ya home sometime?”

“I would love that,” you couldn’t help the smile that spread on your face. You’d been stopping to chat up Crutchie for a while now because you liked the newsboy. He was cute and charming and funny and while you were sure he flirted with everyone you liked when he smiled at you and flirted with you. “You could uh, walk me back today?” You offered.  

You had been in the city long enough that you knew both the longest and the quickest route to get home. You took Crutchie the long way back, walking slowly as you did. All the rules about flirting you had learned from the kids at your last service. The shy looks, the accidental brush of a hand or a trip over air only to hold his hand, a sweet smile and laugh at everything he said. You disregarded all of those rules though, instead taking Crutchie’s free arm and walking with him along the street.  

“Do ya like the city so far?” Crutchie asked.  

“It’s nice...it’s always busy. I do like that this house has less kids, and less land.” You replied, “walking to get some eggs at market is a lot easier than wrestling with a bunch of chickens every morning. Or milking a cow!”  

“Oh,” Crutchie said, “I thought yous lived on Poplar.” He was surprised to hear you say that you were in service. But more than that he felt a little more hopeful.  

“I do, but I live in the servants’ rooms, off the kitchen.” You explained, “it’s a pretty nice job, all things considered.”

“I’m sure it beats being a newsie.” He replied.  

“For me certainly, I’d be a lousy newsie...no one would ever buy a pape from me.”  

“I would.”

“You’re too sweet to me Crutchie.”

“I mean it, nothing sells a paper faster than a beautiful face.” He replied, blush staining his cheeks.  

“That’s why you sell so many,” you teased, leaning over quickly and kissing his cheek. You pulled away just as fast, watching the smile that took over his face.  

The two of you walked the rest of the way back in silence, stealing quick glances at each other. When you arrived at your employer’s house on Poplar you led him to the side entrance, in the alley. The kitchen door was open and a few of the other workers were inside, pretending not to look at the two of you but glancing over curiously.  

“Thanks for escorting me home Crutchie, I really enjoyed walking with you.”  

“Maybe I could walk you tomorrow too?” He offered, holding your hand.  

“I would really like that.” You said, kissing his cheek once more, “I’ll see you tomorrow then?”

“See you tomorrow.”  

Crutchie took the quick way home, heading straight for Racetrack’s corner to tell his friend that he owed him a dime. Racetrack had bet Crutchie that she would be too upper-class for him but two kisses and the promise to walk together tomorrow told Crutchie otherwise. He had won, more than just the dime he was already planning on using to buy you a bouquet of flowers for tomorrow.  

-

More newsies. 

#crutchie Morris x reader #Crutchie Morris imagine #Crutchie Morris fanfiction #Crutchie Morris fanfic #Crutchie x reader #Crutchie imagine #Crutchie fanfiction #Crutchie fanfic #newsies fanfiction #newsies imagine #newsies fanfic #newsies: the musical fanfiction #reader insert #collecting stories imagine #cs discography series

[the-awkward-outlaw]

Second Chances - Epilogue 1

Take Me Home

Warnings: None!

Word count: ~2000

Masterlist 

Read on AO3

This version of the epilogue has no kids between reader and Arthur - if you want kids, read version 2 here

You wake up to the sounds of birds singing. Stretching, you open your eyes to view the canvas above your head. It takes a moment for you to wake up enough to sit up, but when you do, you see the tent’s empty. Arthur must already be out. 

Stepping out of the tent, you find him kneeling next to the fire. He greets you as you gaze around Cattail Pond before sitting down next to him. He’s just finished cooking some bacon that he packed along for the trip. When you’re seated, he pulls you into a big hug, kissing your temple affectionately. 

It’s been five years since he found you near Aurora Basin in Tall Trees. Five long, mostly good years, although you both still often remember the time you spent with the gang, both the good and the bad. 

After you left the gang and Hamish died, you decided to head out west where you both belonged. He wanted to go down as far south as New Austin near Tumbleweed, but you never liked it much down there. Too hot, too dry. Not enough green. When he asked you where you’d prefer going to, you automatically said Big Valley near Strawberry. To your surprise, he happily agreed. 

He found a good patch in the forest near the huge meadow. Said it was the perfect spot for you both to spend the rest of your lives as there was plenty of space and lots of game to hunt, plus Strawberry wasn’t too far. There, Arthur built you a home. You said it would be easier to just buy one of those premade homes you’d been hearing about. It would take less time and energy, plus it could be built before winter, but Arthur hated the idea. He said he wanted to build you something with his bare hands. You were sure he did it because you’d both lost so much recently and he just wanted something good to come from it. 

However, money was very tight when he began. The only money you had was the little from your satchel, which certainly wasn’t enough to buy the right tools for the job or horses or oxen to help. Arthur recalled the money left in Blackwater and he was sure Dutch or any of the others hadn’t gone back looking for it. So one night, you both snuck in and found, in a large tree near a headstone marked “Greta Van der Linde”, a small chest hidden inside with over $50,000. Neither of you could believe your luck, but you wasted no time in taking it. 

With the new money, Arthur bought two oxen, tools and even hired a few hands to help him cut down the lumber and shape it before building it. While he and the hands worked, you worked on getting a garden going. 

Soon after, the two of you got married. It was easily the happiest day of your life. It was very simple and few guests were there to witness it. Charlotte was one of them. She’d travelled all the way from Annesburg to Strawberry, but she said she wouldn’t dream of missing it. Charles was there as well. Word of the gang’s misfortunes had gotten to him up north. He believed you were both dead, but when he found no signs of your bodies, he pieced the story together and knew you’d both head west. He was the only one from the gang you and Arthur saw after John left. You wished he, Abigail, Jack and Sadie could have been there as well, but you’d heard nothing from them. They probably believed you and Arthur to be dead. 

The structure of the house took months to build and then winter came, which forced Arthur to stop building onto it. It didn’t stop him from continuing to cut the smaller pieces, such as the roof tiles. He also worked on getting the fireplace built so that the two of you could huddle under your tent and be warm near the fire in what would be the living room. 

It took two years until the house was finished and Arthur couldn’t have been prouder. He said it was for you, but you reminded him it was for his benefit as well. A few months later, he built a barn so Buell could have a proper stall. The old morgan you’d stolen died a few months previously, taken down by a broken leg. It was sad, but not as painful as losing Rannoch or Rain, both of whom you still miss deeply. It was easy to see Arthur still missed Artemis. 

When the barn was built, you and Arthur bought two milking cows and chickens, figuring it wouldn’t hurt to make your home into a functioning ranch. Arthur had other ideas, however. He came home one day with four mares and an exceptionally handsome blood bay thoroughbred stallion named Jake, stating he wanted to breed horses. You couldn’t say no, he seemed so excited. 

You still felt bad that you couldn’t give Arthur children. You knew he’d be a wonderful father, but he said he was actually happy you couldn’t. He said that after Eliza and Isaac, he didn’t want kids because he was scared he’d mess up or that what happened to them could happen to you. His heart simply couldn’t bear that pain. 

Arthur hands you the bacon and then leans back a bit on his hands. 

“What you thinkin’ about?” he asks. 

“Nothing really. Just how pretty it is out here.” He chuckles softly and kisses your head again. You were the one who asked to go on this hunting trip, still not liking to be tied to one place for too long, as beautiful as your home is. Arthur’s much the same way. He simply spent too much time moving from one place to the next with the gang that he gets easily frustrated when he’s been cooped up too long. 

“Reckon we should head back soon though. Carson will probably need help fixin’ the fence.” 

You sigh. Carson is a boy from Strawberry. He was the first hand Arthur hired to help build the house and then, to your surprise, built him a small one-room cabin not far from the property. When you asked him why, he stated that when he helped Micah escape the Strawberry prison, Micah killed a man and his wife. Carson happened to be their only son and he was all alone, except for his yellow lab Lily. Arthur felt guilty for Carson’s fate, so he invited the boy to live on your land and work as a hand. 

It was one of the best things Arthur’s done. Carson’s a pleasant, kind and thoughtful boy. He works well with the horses, but his affection for them is nothing compared to how he treats Lily. 

You could tell Arthur really liked her as well, but she wasn’t his dog so they couldn’t have the same relationship. So, for his birthday, you bought Arthur a mountain dog puppy. He and that puppy were in love at first sight and he named him Timber. From that moment on, they were inseparable. 

Timber runs over to Arthur now, his paws dirty from digging and his tail wagging. Arthur rubs his ears happily.

“Hey boah,” he says. Timber groans happily and then turns to lick you in the face. “You ready to see Lily?” 

Timber barks. He and Lily are extremely close. Not only that, Timber makes for a wonderful herding dog. He’s very protective of the new foals and when the horses are let out in the big meadow to graze, he watches them like a hawk. 

You and Arthur pack up your tent and douse the fire before mounting up on your horses. You pat your dapple bay breton mare who you named Ruby after Rain’s mother. She’s as big and tough as Artemis was, but looks nothing like her otherwise.  Arthur hops onto Buell’s back and together, you ride home laiden with pelts.You’ll likely keep a couple and then sell the rest. Your saddlebags are bulging with fresh herbs, which you’ll hang in the barn to dry.

After nearly an hour’s travel, you see the trail leading off to Pinewood Crest, your home. Arthur had wanted to name it Hosea’s Rest but you stated you needed to keep a low profile and try your best not to have any affiliations with the gang for both your protection. Carson waves to you from the meadow, where the mares and their foals are grazing. Timber runs over to Lily, barking madly. 

“Welcome back, Mr. and Mrs. Collins,” he says, running over. 

You both say hello and head to the barn to dismount and unsaddle. It was Arthur’s idea to change your aliases. You suggested keeping the name Tacitus Kilgore as it was easy for you to remember, but he said it wasn’t smart. That name was likely associated with Dutch now. Instead, he said he’d go by the name William Arthur Collins, that way if you called him Arthur, people wouldn’t find it suspicious. You also changed your name to Y/F/N Alice Collins. 

After putting everything away and hanging the herbs up to dry, you go out and stand at the edge of the meadow, watching the horses and cows grazing, Timber and Lily rolling in the grass. Arthur comes up from behind and folds his arms around you, pulling you against his chest. 

You sigh and rest your head against him, still watching the foals. There’s a small colt who looks exactly like Rain at that age and you named him Thunder. He kicks his heels, trotting circles around his bay mother named Willow. She ignores him, continuing to graze with the three other mares. Thunder runs near Buell and kicks out near him in play, but Buell just lifts his head, rumbles and then goes back to grazing. Ruby starts rolling in the dirt, making you laugh.

“Thought you were helping Carson fix the fence?” you ask. 

“Ah, he’s got it for a minute. Besides, you looked so happy over here, had to come be with ya.” 

He kisses your temple again. You turn and meet his lips with yours. He smiles against your lips and then looks out to the meadow once more. After everything you’ve done over your life, after all the suffering and hardship, you’d do it all over again if you knew it’d lead you here. You are happy. 

The End

**Thank you all so much for going on this journey with me. It breaks my heart to end this fic, but it has been such an amazing ride. I would never have gotten far without all the encouragement I’ve received. I cannot express my gratitude in words, but I’m still amazed at how this led me to meet so many amazing people and the friendships I’ve made because of this fic that was inspired by the incredible game Red Dead Redemption 2. Thank you all so much!**

#rdr2 #rdr2 fanfic #red dead redemption 2 #red dead fanfic #arthur morgan #arthur morgan x oc #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan x female reader #arthur x female reader #arthur morgan x female #Van Der Linde Gang #R* Games #rockstar games #I'm awkward #second chances

[nostalgiaispeace]

1919.

1. What’s the last thing you ate?

leftover nachos

2. What’s your favourite cheese? pepper jack

3. What’s your favourite fish? ew none of them

4. What’s your favourite fruit? blueberries

5. When, if ever, did you start liking olives? never

6. When, if ever, did you start liking beer? never

7. When, if ever, did you start liking shellfish? never

8. What was the best thing your mum/dad/guardian used to make? my mom was never a good cook haha

9. What’s the native specialty of your hometown? i’m not sure

10. What’s your comfort food? mac and cheese

11. What’s your favourite type of chocolate? milk

12. How do you like your steak? i don’t like steak

13. How do you like your burger? Well-done

14. How do you like your eggs? hardboiled

15. How do you like your potatoes? in every way that they are made

16. How do you take your coffee? black

17. How do you take your tea? sugar and honey

18. What’s your favourite mug? my NYC mug

19. What’s your biscuit or cookie of choice? chocolate chip

20. What’s your ideal breakfast? french toast, bacon, eggs, hashbrowns

21. What’s your ideal sandwich? egg salad

22. What’s your ideal pizza: just cheese

23. What’s your ideal pie (sweet or savoury)? cherry

24. What’s your ideal salad? cheese, chicken, dried fruit, peppers

25. What food do you always like to have in the fridge? cheese, eggs, and bread

26. What food do you always like to have in the freezer? chicken nuggets and pizza

27. What food do you always like to have in the cupboard? pasta

28. What spices can you not live without? salt and pepper

29. What sauces can you not live without? Tomato and Alfredo

30. Where do you buy most of your food? kroger

31. How often do you go food shopping? every two weeks

33. What’s the most expensive piece of kitchen equipment you own? idk

34. What’s the last piece of equipment you bought for your kitchen? not sure

35. What piece of kitchen equipment could you not live without? stove

36. How many times a week/month do you cook from raw ingredients? just the weekends

37. What’s the last thing you cooked from raw ingredients? shepherds pie

38. What meats have you eaten besides cow, pig and poultry? i only eat chicken and beef really

39. What’s the last time you ate something that had fallen on the floor? i don’t do that

40. What’s the last time you ate something you’d picked in the wild? idk

41. Arrange the following in order of preference: Italian, Mexican, Chinese, Indian, Thai, Sushi – Mexican, Italian, Chinese, Indian

42. Arrange the following in order of preference: Vodka, Whiskey, Brandy, Rum – Rum, Vodka

43. Arrange the following in order of preference: Garlic, Basil, Caramel, Lime, Mint, Ginger, Aniseed – Garlic, Basil, Caramel

44. Arrange the following in order of preference: Pineapple, Orange, Apple, Strawberry, Cherry, Watermelon, Banana. – Strawberry, Banana

45. Bread and spread: peanut butter

46. What’s your fast food restaurant of choice, and what do you usually order? chick fil a, spicy chicken sandwich

47. Pick a city. What are the best dining experiences you’ve had in that city? NYC and literally everything

48. What’s your choice of tipple at the end of a long day? tea

49. What’s the next thing you’ll eat? idk

50. Are you hungry now? no

51. Do you eat your breakfast everyday? yeah

52. At what time do you have breakfast? 7am usually

53. At what time do you have lunch? 1pmish

54. What do you have for lunch? sandwich or leftovers

55. At what time do you have dinner? 8pm

56. What do you have for dinner? i make a lot of different things

57. Do you light candles during dinner? No

58. How many chairs are there in your dining room and who sits in the main chair? none

59. Do you eat and drink using your right hand or the left one? right

61. Mention the veggies that you like most: peppers, onions, asparagus, greenbeans, corn

62. What fruit and vegetable do you like the least? alot lol

63. You like your fruit salad to have more: berries

64. You prefer your vegetable salad to contain more: peppers

65. What’s your favourite sandwich spread? peanut butter

66. What’s your favourite chocolate bar? all of them

67. What’s your favourite dessert? ice cream

68. What’s your favourite drink? coffee

69. What’s your favourite snack? candy

70. What’s your favourite bubble gum flavour? peppermint

71. What’s your favourite ice cream flavour? cookie dough

72. What’s your favourite potato chip flavour? plain

73. What’s your favourite soup? tomato

74. What’s your favourite pizza? cheese

75. What’s your favourite type of dish? carbs

76. What food do you hate? seafood

77. What’s your favourite restaurant? mexican

78. Do you eat homemade food, or food delivered from outside? both

80. Who cooks at home? me

81. What kind of diet (e.g. low-fat, high-fiber, high-carbohydrate, balanced diet etc.) do you have? none

82. How do you keep yourself fit? lol i don’t

#me #survey

[alicedoessurveys]

Food Tag

1. What’s the last thing you ate? we had a bbq, I had a jacket potato with cheese and some tikka skewers

2. What’s your favourite cheese? mozzarella or red Leicester 

3. What’s your favourite fish? the only fish I eat is tuna and I wouldn't even call that my favourite 

4. What’s your favourite fruit? apple or banana, literally the only fruit I eat 

5. When, if ever, did you start liking olives? never

6. When, if ever, did you start liking beer? don't like beer, cant even stand the smell of it 

7. When, if ever, did you start liking shellfish? never

8. What was the best thing your mum/dad/guardian used to make? my mom does amazing dirty fries. she cooks them perfectly and adds turkey mince cooking in tomatoes and cheese and omg their just kdjjdsgfdskuhf

9. What’s the native specialty of your hometown? curries- apparently Birmingham is famous for its curries

10. What’s your comfort food? anything hot and covered in cheese, or chocolate 

11. What’s your favourite type of chocolate? ALL the chocolate

12. How do you like your steak? I don't eat red meat 

13. How do you like your burger? with cheese and either ketchup for veggie burger or bbq sauce for chicken burgers

14. How do you like your eggs? I dont eat eggs

15. How do you like your potatoes? baked with lots of butter 

16. How do you take your coffee? don't like coffee

17. How do you take your tea? don't like tea

18. What’s your favourite mug? my “don't let the muggles get you down” mug

19. What’s your biscuit or cookie of choice? oreos

20. What’s your ideal breakfast? cereal

21. What’s your ideal sandwich? cheese -  im seeing a theme with my answers here...

22. What’s your ideal pizza: alllll the cheese, a bit of chicken and some bbq sauce 

23. What’s your ideal pie (sweet or savoury)? chicken and gravy

24. What’s your ideal salad? no thanks

25. What food do you always like to have in the fridge? cheese, milk, some sort of yoghurt dessert

26. What food do you always like to have in the freezer? a supply of veggie food, some ready meals for lazy times, ice cream

27. What food do you always like to have in the cupboard? pasta, cereal, soup, beans 

28. What spices can you not live without? basil, thyme, turmeric, paprika, garlic, salt, pepper

29. What sauces can you not live without? tomato, bbq, curry sauce

30. Where do you buy most of your food? supermarket

31. How often do you go food shopping? not often because I live at home its mostly done by parents, but I like to go get my own stuff every other week. obviously with covid lockdown ive not been at all in months 

33. What’s the most expensive piece of kitchen equipment you own? again, I live with my parents so I don't actually own anything

34. What’s the last piece of equipment you bought for your kitchen? n/a

35. What piece of kitchen equipment could you not live without? microwave, toastie maker

36. How many times a week/month do you cook from raw ingredients? I dont cook meat 

37. What’s the last thing you cooked from raw ingredients? again,  I don't cook with meat 

38. What meats have you eaten besides cow, pig and poultry? the only meat I eat it chicken or turkey 

39. What’s the last time you ate something that had fallen on the floor? I don't 

40. What’s the last time you ate something you’d picked in the wild? I don't 

41. Arrange the following in order of preference: Italian, Mexican, Chinese, Indian, Thai, Sushi – italian, Chinese, Indian, I don't eat the others 

42. Arrange the following in order of preference: Vodka, Whiskey, Brandy, Rum – rum, thats the only one I drink

43. Arrange the following in order of preference: Garlic, Basil, Lime, Mint, Ginger, Aniseed – basil, garlic, I don't use the others 

44. Arrange the following in order of preference: Pineapple, Orange, Apple, Strawberry, Cherry, Watermelon, Banana. – apple, banana, I don't eat the others but flavour wise id go cherry, strawberry, pineapple, watermelon, orange 

45. Bread and spread: bread and butter, thats it. im simple.

46. What’s your fast food restaurant of choice, and what do you usually order? Chinese - chicken in black bean sauce and spicy chips

47. Pick a city. What are the best dining experiences you’ve had in that city? London- shake shack do the best cheese fries omg 

48. What’s your choice of tipple at the end of a long day? I don't really have a tipple 

49. What’s the next thing you’ll eat? cereal in the morning 

50. Are you hungry now? no

51. Do you eat your breakfast everyday? when im at home yeah, but work days I tend to skip it because I don't have time 

52. At what time do you have breakfast? around 9/9.30am

53. At what time do you have lunch? between 12-2pm

54. What do you have for lunch? whatever I feel like/whatever I can find 

55. At what time do you have dinner? between 6-8pm

56. What do you have for dinner? whatever my mom cooks

57. Do you light candles during dinner? nope

58. How many chairs are there in your dining room and who sits in the main chair? 4, there isn't a main chair

59. Do you eat and drink using your right hand or the left one? right

61. Mention the veggies that you like most: peas, thats it 

62. What fruit and vegetable do you like the least? all of them 

63. You like your fruit salad to have more: don't eat it

64. You prefer your vegetable salad to contain more: don't eat it 

65. What’s your favourite sandwich spread? cheese, surprise surprise 

66. What’s your favourite chocolate bar? Cadbury dairy milk or galaxy

67. What’s your favourite dessert? brownies

68. What’s your favourite drink? pepsi, or summer fruits squash

69. What’s your favourite snack? don't really have snacks 

70. What’s your favourite bubble gum flavour? don't like it

71. What’s your favourite ice cream flavour? caramel or chocolate 

72. What’s your favourite potato chip flavour? don't like them

73. What’s your favourite soup? tomato

74. What’s your favourite pizza? cheese and tomato 

75. What’s your favourite type of dish? italian? I don't think I understand the question 

76. What food do you hate? fish, rice, veg, 

77. What’s your favourite restaurant? a little local one called ‘Little Italy’ where I go every year on my birthday 

78. Do you eat homemade food, or food delivered from outside? homemade mostly, but we have a lot of takeaway too

80. Who cooks at home? mom mostly, but me and dad do occasionally too

81. What kind of diet (e.g. low-fat, high-fiber, high-carbohydrate, balanced diet etc.) do you have? I think its called the ridiculously unhealthy diet 

82. How do you keep yourself fit? go for a lot of walks, and my job is really active 

#food tag #tag #survey #long

[purplesurveys]

900

1. What’s the last thing you ate? Shawarma. It was a usual meal of mine at school so I’ve been missing it a lot during this quarantine, and I was happy when my dad got me a couple ones yesterday.

2. What’s your favourite cheese? I haven’t been super experimental when it comes to cheese mainly because the better ones are a little expensive and I’m more willing to spend my money on other foods...but the best one I’ve had is feta.

3. What’s your favourite fish? My favorite cooked or grilled fish is tilapia and eel; as for raw fish I love tuna.

4. What’s your favourite fruit? I don’t really like fruit but I’m open to eating avocado-flavored things like shakes and cheesecake; and I’m okay with strawberry-flavored candy hahaha.

5. When, if ever, did you start liking olives? I’ve never liked olives. I take them out of my pizza and such.

6. When, if ever, did you start liking beer? I never *liked* beer but sometimes I’ll have a bottle if and only if it’s to socialize at a party. I just keep the grimace to myself lol because I personally never found it good. I had my first beer at Marielle’s debut, four years ago.

7. When, if ever, did you start liking shellfish? High school. That was when my palate started to expand and I wanted to try being more adventurous with food. I got into shellfish pretty early on and my mom even used to buy a kilo of mussels just for me. 

8. What was the best thing your mum/dad/guardian used to make? I love my dad’s laksa, risotto, curries, and chicken wings. My mom doesn’t cook much but I do like her spaghetti.

9. What’s the native specialty of your hometown? My city doesn’t have native food of its own; and I’m not sure about my province’s specialtes either only because cuisines from other provinces are far more popular. I can say though that most visitors who come to the country often try adobo, sinigang, kare-kare, and bulalo.

10. What’s your comfort food? Cheeseburgers, samgyeopsal, pad thai, and chicken wings.

11. What’s your favourite type of chocolate? Milk chocolate. And it gets a lot of flak because it’s not actually chocolate, but I do enjoy the flavor of white chocolate too.

12. How do you like your steak? Rare.

13. How do you like your burger? I like mine with caramelized onions, a mayo-based sauce, and brioche buns; barbecue sauce or jalapeños are add-ons I have no problem being put in my burger. I don’t like tomatoes, pickles, and lettuce.

14. How do you like your eggs? Scrambled if on toast; omelette with cheese, tomatoes, mushrooms, and bell peppers if with rice; and obviously, poached if on top of an Eggs Benedict. I don’t have a preferred style for eggs.

15. How do you like your potatoes? As French fries or mojos.

16. How do you take your coffee? If someone is making the coffee for me, I request for lots of cream and sugar. I’d drink any kind of coffee but black. If I’m at a coffee shop I typically get caramel macchiato.

17. How do you take your tea? I enjoy lemonade iced tea. I don’t really like hot tea.

18. What’s your favourite mug? I suppose my favorite is the only mug I own, which is a white mug that changes colors depending on the temperature of the drink inside.

19. What’s your biscuit or cookie of choice? I can’t stand biscuits anymore because those are what my grandma/mom packed for my recess nearly everyday throughout grade school. I don’t like store-brought cookies either because they taste super processed, but my favorite as a kid were the Presto peanut butter cookies.

20. What’s your ideal breakfast? Garlic rice, a packed omelette, and hashbrowns if I’m somewhere fancy. Scrambled eggs and hotdogs when I’m at home.

21. What’s your ideal sandwich? Monte Cristo or banh mi.

22. What’s your ideal pizza: Quattro formaggi. If we’re talking more experimental pizzas, barbecue pizza is a guilty pleasure.

23. What’s your ideal pie (sweet or savoury)? I’m not a big pie person but I do love savory a lot more, like chicken pot pie. I think most of the sweet pies out there are fruit-based anyway.

24. What’s your ideal salad? Spicy tuna salad. I’ve been having such a craving for it :(

25. What food do you always like to have in the fridge? We always have white bread, eggs, my mom’s cranberry juice, and veggies.

26. What food do you always like to have in the freezer? In the freezer we never run out of various meats and frozen meal packs, like frozen bangus, hotdogs, chicken nuggets, French fries, etc. We also often have ice cream, but it’s not a must-have for us obviously.

27. What food do you always like to have in the cupboard? Pasta, canned food like luncheon meat and corned beef, cup noodles, various condiments like soy sauce and fish sauce, 3-in-1 coffee.

28. What spices can you not live without? I can’t cook but I do know I like salt, pepper, paprika, and cumin. I’m sure I’m missing other essential ones lol

29. What sauces can you not live without? Sriracha, bagoong, banana ketchup, gochujang, peanut sauce, gravy, barbecue sauce, aioli, mayonnaise.

30. Where do you buy most of your food? My parents don’t have a supermarket preference; they just go to wherever is most convenient for them at the moment. Once I start doing my own grocery shopping though I would rather go to a supermarket where they’d have a wider selection for foreign foods, like those that would have Pop-Tarts and sriracha sauce. Just the foodie in me that constantly has to have food from other cultures.

31. How often do you go food shopping? My parents do the groceries once every two or three weeks, I think.

33. What’s the most expensive piece of kitchen equipment you own? Aside from the obvious ref or cooking range, probably the coffee maker. Not sure how much it cost my parents but it’s supposed to be branded haha.

34. What’s the last piece of equipment you bought for your kitchen? Dad bought a couple of pans because he didn’t like how our old ones were starting to get too many scratches.

35. What piece of kitchen equipment could you not live without? Refrigerator. So many things would spoil without it...that’s why when we get blackouts the first thing we worry about is how long the ref would stay cold.

36. How many times a week/month do you cook from raw ingredients? I’ve only done it once.

37. What’s the last thing you cooked from raw ingredients?

38. What meats have you eaten besides cow, pig and poultry? Crocodile, carabao, lamb.

39. What’s the last time you ate something that had fallen on the floor? Don’t remember exactly when but it has to be sometime recently. I’m not too grossed out by this.

40. What’s the last time you ate something you’d picked in the wild? I have never done this.

41. Arrange the following in order of preference: Italian, Mexican, Chinese, Indian, Thai, Sushi – Indian, Thai, Italian, Japanese, Chinese, Mexican. This question is a teeny bit annoying and a little offensive. How would you like it if I referred to American food as ‘ribs’ lol

42. Arrange the following in order of preference: Vodka, Whiskey, Brandy, Rum – Vodka, rum, (some) whiskey. I don’t drink brandy because that’s what my grandpa, who had alcohol issues, used to drink.

43. Arrange the following in order of preference: Garlic, Basil, Lime, Mint, Ginger, Aniseed – Aniseed, garlic, basil, ginger, lime, mint.

44. Arrange the following in order of preference: Pineapple, Orange, Apple, Strawberry, Cherry, Watermelon, Banana. –

45. Bread and spread: I don’t really munch on this particular food. Toast and butter is enough for me.

46. What’s your fast food restaurant of choice, and what do you usually order? It’s either KFC or Jollibee. In KFC I get a Zinger and a brownie; in Jollibee, I usually order the chicken-spaghetti set, large fries, and a Yum Burger. If they have tuna pie on the menu I’d get that too. My appetite gets exceptionally large when it comes to Jollibee hahahaha.

47. Pick a city. What are the best dining experiences you’ve had in that city? I no longer remember what exactly I ate but I had a blaaaast eating in Bali. I also had a sushi platter in Fukuoka that I’ll never forget.

48. What’s your choice of tipple at the end of a long day? I don’t drink regularly but if I’m out with friends and we want to chill after a tiring day, we get a pitcher of a mixed drink.

49. What’s the next thing you’ll eat? Eggs and hotdogs for breakfast. Probably with bread.

50. Are you hungry now? A little bit, considering it’s nearly 10 and I still haven’t had breakfast.

51. Do you eat your breakfast everyday? I’ve been having it everyday now because I’ve been home for...most of the year...sigh. But I skipped it all the time when I was in school because getting to class on time and having a clean attendance record mattered to me more than filling up my stomach. 52. At what time do you have breakfast? On weekdays I have it between 9-10 AM. On weekends when my parents are home, we have brunch instead at around 10:30-11 AM because they wake up late.

53. At what time do you have lunch? I normally skip lunch now. In school I just had tiny eating breaks throughout the day, but I didn’t have lunch per se.

54. What do you have for lunch? My usual purchases were instant noodles/kwek-kwek, tapsilog from Rodic’s, or shawarma rice. Thrived on these three for my entire college life.

55. At what time do you have dinner? 7-8 PM, depending on whenever my dad is finished cooking.

56. What do you have for dinner? My dad likes changing up our dishes everyday :) It’s one of my favorite things about quarantine. Outside of the quarantine, I’ve never had a main dinner dish.

57. Do you light candles during dinner? No.

58. How many chairs are there in your dining room and who sits in the main chair? 6 chairs. We don’t have a ‘main’ chair that’s larger than the rest, but my dad is the one who sits on the chair on one end of the dining table, or what we call the kabisera in Filipino. My mom, siblings, and I sit on either side of him. 

59. Do you eat and drink using your right hand or the left one? I use my right hand for the spoon and my left hand for the fork. I drink with my right hand most of the time.

61. Mention the veggies that you like most: Broccoli, cauliflower, lettuce, cabbage, spinach, asparagus, string beans. Idk what eggplants and bell peppers are but I like those too.

62. What fruit and vegetable do you like the least? Cucumber and ampalaya. 63. You like your fruit salad to have more: Air. Hahahaha I do not like fruit salads.

64. You prefer your vegetable salad to contain more: I love vegetables but don’t really eat vegetable salads? I don’t think I’ve even heard of those.

65. What’s your favourite sandwich spread? Whatever goes on banh mi.

66. What’s your favourite chocolate bar? Whittaker’s peanut butter chocolate.

67. What’s your favourite dessert? I really love macarons, cupcakes, and cheesecake.

68. What’s your favourite drink? Just water. Other drinks make me fuller more quickly.

69. What’s your favourite snack? Pringles, French fries, corndogs...anything deep-fried, really.

70. What’s your favourite bubble gum flavour? Strawberry, or just the original bubblegum flavor.

71. What’s your favourite ice cream flavour? Salted caramel, queso real, or cookies and cream.

72. What’s your favourite potato chip flavour? Original or sour cream and onion.

73. What’s your favourite soup? Miso. Have to have it whenever I have Japanese food.

74. What’s your favourite pizza? Already answered this, but I will always order quattro formaggi if I see it on a menu.

75. What’s your favourite type of dish? I have lots of favorites, but I think chicken curry takes the cake for me. 

76. What food do you hate? Fruits, any dessert with fruits.

77. What’s your favourite restaurant? Yabu. It’s a Japanese restaurant that doesn’t even serve sushi (because I’m still ticked off by that sushi question lol).

78. Do you eat homemade food, or food delivered from outside? These days I eat food cooked by either parent. But when I’m on my own, I buy my food.

80. Who cooks at home? My dad does most of the time. My mom will make breakfast on the weekends.

81. What kind of diet (e.g. low-fat, high-fiber, high-carbohydrate, balanced diet etc.) do you have? I’m not on any.

82. How do you keep yourself fit? I just moderate my food intake in general and make sure I stop eating once I feel full. I don’t work out or count calories and stuff.

#survey #surveys

[heads-in-the-clouds-spacecadet]

When asked to write a daily diary for anxiety management.

Here are a few days example....

Sunday 24th 

Mood/anxiety = numb. 

Additional meds =8mg of diazipam.

My whole body aches yet it shouldn't. My stomach is growling yet i feel physically sick. 

Things i ask myself....

Q.1 Will i leave my safe space, weighted blanket & mountain of pillows?

A.1 NO. 

Q.2 Will i manage my yoga routine

A.2 NO

Reasons....Why

I feel exhausted even though ive not been outside since Thursday. I just want the aching to subside the pain to leave. My jaw is clenched closed making eating an ordeal. I know this needs to be done. 

The dread of what passive aggressive message/s ill receive today either in person or written either way im struggling to motivate myself to move.

The Internet has been blocked for nearly a wk now. But i just let it slide as the saying goes choose your arguements "wifi is not the hill i want to die on" quote from TBBT. I hear Luke (my brother) is now in his bedroom and his door is closed. He has been banging around the house sending passive aggressive messages (sms) since 4am. My belongings that i left downstairs were thrown into my room. I'm nervous to leave my room till i know he is asleep. 

Flashback/negative thoughts....

1. How can my baby brother be an emotional manipulator. 

2. Last time i had to justify my everymove i was in Portugal in a very bad relationship. 

*****Ways im looking to excuse his behaviour. Find the cause to my sudden crash of low mood aka depression with a nice battle of anxiety.

---Logically i know its not the same. 

---Emotionally it hurts the same. 

The way he looks at me with disgust, resentment & impatience is the trigger. I realise this. How someone you love can make you feel this way. 

Solution: i decide to find a solution to the sudden conflict of money and i know there is a receipt in the car. I go to the normal place the keys are kept and theyre no where to be found. I look in all the obvious logical places they  could be and realise theyre hidden by my loving brother. His Reasons, 1-to stop me  buying shit (his words). 2. He has decided its his house, his car so therefore his rules. (Its all my mums btw)

As im downstairs i notice the kitchen is a mess. Pots all over from a feast Luke cooked up the night before. Or should i say 2am. 

So i feel defeated. Ive basically been cleaning non stop everytime i use a room as per gov guidelines and he just doesnt seem to comprehend the severity of the situation. 

I decide i need to eat. So i opt for Shreddies with Oat Milk (Luke has a serious milk allergy to the milk proteins in cows milk so im not fussed about milk and am happy to use alternatives) topped with vanilla soya yogurt, bannana, a few cranberries, 3 strawberries, sultanas and crushed Almonds. My logical brain is telling me eat well as we are not leaving the bedroom again unless desperate. 

I send a few messages to the family whats app (Luke refuses to be a part of this) and receive encouraging and support in return. Everyone is struggling in their own way so i appreciate having a small outlet between us all.

After food i sleep finally. 

Trying now to Ready myself for round 2 which i know is coming.

My mum calls i dont want to answer but i do. I explain the situation. She knows, she has dealt with his angry behaviour since he was 11yrs old. She stated she is coming to visit Tuesday as per new gov guidelines and we will meet in the park. She then asks me to pass the phone to Luke which i pointblank refuse. Im not ready for round 2 yet. Especially since he has his own phone he is just not answering making everyone worry about him but he just resents it. Its safe to say im proud i refused to do something. Gold star award ⭐

Monday 25th

Mood/Anxiety -  still no change from yesterday but i decide i have to force myself to move. Wash, clean and pack the additional things my mum has requested. 

Additional meds - i decided against taking anything today as i need to be clear headed for my appointment Tues and obvs my mums visit.

I check the weather see its a nice day decide washing is task 1. I set a bath running (multi tasking saving time from all the free time) and head downstairs to pop the washing machine on. Before i left my room i checked my phone for messages i have one from my mum telling me she has had words with Luke and that he needs to basically deal with the resentment in a more positive way. 

This explains all the banging and loud music yesterday early eve. He decided to actually clean. 

Anyhow I head downstairs. Kitchen is clean, messages all wiped from the black board. 

I decide i must try and communicate with Luke as we cant take the conflict with us to the park it isnt fair to our mum. 

I can hear him moving so send a sms message asking if he wants anything in the oven. No response. ***He did finally get out of bed at 3pm so a peaceful day so far. 

I decide food is required. I opt for protein soya burgers x2 with Spinach, tomatos, avacado, sultanas, almond pieces and some crumpets. I sit in the garden to eat.

All washing is out and drying but im to anxiety ridden and unmotivated to enjoy the sunshine. 

I head back to my room to sort bits for my mum and throw away my origami collection. It was over taking my room and again causing conflict. 

Lukes awake!!!. I decide to say hello. So far so good. He decides to make himself lunch and throws a fit because i ate a £0.45 avocado. I walk away as i know he is just venting and i need to not start the circle of negative thoughts or interactions. This is rewarded with resentment. Luke suddenly decides to do his own washing and cut the grass. Which means my washing is in his way. Before he even starts i am pulling in whats dry mainly because i want to go back to bed and need my bedsheets but also because he wont care if my washing turns green or is damaged. To my delight my sheets are dry but my pjs etc need another 30mins so i leave them whilst i go and make my bed. 

Im bellowed at about washing as Luke needs the line. So i head down stairs to reteive the rest of my belongings. 

Self soothing thoughts...

Im walking on eggshells trying not to provoke the beast and i need to keep going. Focus on my achievements. I left my room. I cleaned myself, my clothing and my pillow fort which has been my safe zone for the past 4days. 

Deep down thought i am disappointed as i know isolation and distancing is not a long turn solution as the yrs pass im becoming more and more isolated and lonely. 

Im downstairs again and i ask Luke if he wants anything popping in the oven as i was having toast. He requested 2 burgers and chips but on seperate trays as he was hungry. Easy to do popped into the oven. 40mins later chips are cooked he is plating up and all he says is "why have you cooked so many chips, clearly we now live in a household of wastefulness". 

This was the turning point for me id had enough for 1day and just told him to give it a rest and went to my room. 

Im dozing with Big Bang on in the backround and Luke is banging on my door. Mums on the phone. Confirming arrangements for tomorrow. I say a few oks with the occasional nod. 

I start packing the bits n bobs my mum has asked for and carry then downstairs so theyre ready for the car tomorrow am. 

Its PJs and bed time. Luke has other ideas. He is awake and up and about at 4.30am. Having a bath at 5am, doing weights after his bath at 6am then leaves in the car at 7am. He is back around 8am banging has a shower then decides to leave again in the car. He is meant to be house-bound until July 1st. This in itself causes me anxiety as i cant handle watching another member of my family die in front of my eyes. 

Thoughts...

Yes this is VERY dramatic. STOP IT BRAIN!

Take precautions all will be ok. 

Tuesday 26th

Mood/Anxiety = No change 

Additional meds = 4mg diazipam but late afternoon as i couldnt stop shaking and fidgeting.

My mum is coming to visit. Im trying not to think about the fact Luke is out of the house. 

We are having a picnic social distancing style. 

We head to the coop as Luke has decided even after knowing our mum all his life never be on time, we have to be early. I buy Costa coffee, fresh bread, hummus, bananas, diet coke and some biscuits the nature valley ones theyre really good. Luke doesnt go into the shop I think at least he is listening to some rules. He rolls his eyes as i spray the shopping with dettol spray and use the alcohol hand sanitizer for my hands and door handle etc. I just tell him its how it needs to be done.

We find a perfect parking spot under a bunch of trees. I notice that all the trees are trimmed in a very even shelf across the bottom. It looked like it was designed perfectly for people to walk straight onto the park from the car park without having to fight with tree branches or go around.  But in actual fact its the deer. They eat the lower leaves this made me smile and relax for a moment. WIN.

My mum is late so im nervous that she is 

1. Stuck somewhere (over reaction)

2. Lost (over reaction)

3. Just running late (normal reaction) 

Im a tad fidgety as im aware i have an appointment in 2hrs. Hurry up MOTHER...

I ponder about work and whether or not ill still have a job to return too. Had an email this am stating theyre cutting 200jobs from the team i work in. So not sure if thats a good thing or not. But its also increasing my anxiety as ive read the email and now have a burning desire to do the research to see what my probability of keeping my job will be. Before my brain can go on a major tangent my mum arrives. 

Shes brought Oscar (her poodle) he is so excited to see me. And the big hairy fluff ball  gave me the biggest snuggles. He has a major Covid hairdoo. My mum doesnt hug me which hurts but i know she cant. 

Picnic time. We sit in the middle.of a field away from everyone. Social distancing 10/10. My mum has made me my favourite cakes, rock buns. (Apparently these are a northern thing) but im feeling the love. Its fairly chilled only 1 disagreement with Luke over blinkin avocados.

Im clock checking and aware of impending appointment, im a little (understated) nervous because ive not had positive relationships with therapists or doctors in the past. 

#mental health #lost #hurting #help #self reflection #finelinebetweenloveandhate #still breathing #GAD #recovery #survivor

[cupidmarwani-archive]

The Rehabilitation of Ava Bekker (6/12)

The bread Robin made yesterday looks beautiful when she pulls it out of the fridge to make breakfast. It’s a warm orange-red, laced with dark green herbs, sliced thick and hearty with soft crust. Ava moves alongside her. She hasn’t had breakfast before, but she thinks she’s smart enough to figure out the basics. There are four eggs in the fridge, the exact number Robin said to set aside when they collected them yesterday, and she pulls out each one to set beside the stovetop, already heating the underside of a skillet.

“How do you like your eggs?” Ava asks.

“Scrambled.”

Ava dives back into the fridge for milk, and hunts down a bowl to crack the eggs and dash milk into before whisking them to uniform pale yellow like the nurse station’s countertops. They sizzle in the pan, cook quickly while she fumbles for a spatula. She’s made scrambled eggs a lot of times, but not recently. Connor liked them over easy. But this is Robin, she reminds herself, and keeps stirring as Robin toasts the bread and cuts up a few strawberries fresh from the patch outside. Everything is fragrant and Ava’s mouth waters, even though she’s never really been one for breakfast, perhaps as a result of how hard she pushed herself yesterday. It’s easy to want, and she’s allowed to have it as she serves eggs onto two plates populated by fruit and bread and love.

“I’ll try and finish the trees today,” Ava says, bringing her own plate to the small table, the strawberries running a path of juice toward her toast like it’s a race. “Then I’ll get to harvesting the peach trees, I know you said you wanted to make jam.”

“I’d rather you milk Nina first,” Robin says. “She’s fussy if you wait all day, and I want her to get used to you while I check the roost.”

Nina is the name of one of three cows currently under the care of Robin’s farm. Nina’s mother, Angie, spends most days lying in the shade and drinking water, while Nina’s calf Isaac is always happy to bounce around the pasture. In a couple more months, he’ll be off to another farm as a bull for breeding, and Robin had said that she worries how Nina will react, same as she worries that it’ll be painful the day Angie passes or needs to be put down. Put down like a racing dog on its last leg, like Connor on the OR floor. She doesn’t want to hear the sound. She doesn’t want to think about him. But her memory abuses its power to surround her in it. Ava just barely resists the urge to clap her hands over her ears and scream until it goes away.

“No problem.”

The toast is sweet and savory, warm and hearty in her mouth like more of a meal than just a piece of bread baked the night before. Paired with the eggs, it fills her up more than she’s used to this early in the morning. In a good way, though. By the time she clears her plate, strawberries included, she’s pleasantly full and ready to milk Nina. Robin gave her a basic demonstration yesterday, so she has an idea, but she’s never done this on her own before. It should be fine. She’s pretty sure it should be fine.

“Oh, and you ought to drive into town today,” Robin adds. “Get yourself a big water bottle to carry with you while you work. Passing out from dehydration or heat stroke isn’t all that fun.”

“Yeah, I’ll do that after I take care of Nina.”

Robin gives her a thumbs up and takes both their plates to the sink, leaving Ava to pull on her boots and get the clean buckets off the drying rack. Full, they’re about ten pounds each. That’ll mean Ava builds up some muscle while she’s here, which isn’t the worst thing that could possibly happen to her. She’d look good with muscle, she thinks. Be strong enough to protect herself.

She carries the buckets off to the pasture, where true to form, the cows are up and alive. Nina swishes her tail lazily against flies like buzzards, protecting both herself and Isaac. Angie is just fine on her own in the shade. Her eyes are soft and warm, welcoming, and Ava’s drawn to the idea of sitting under the tree with her and stroking her rough fur while the world carries on past them. But she’s here for Nina.

“Hey,” she says softly on her approach, the two buckets dangling beside her legs. “Morning, Nina.”

Nina eyes her warily. She shifts on her hooves. Yet, when Ava kneels in the damp grass, wetness seeping through to her knees, she stays still. Ava lays a flat palm against her flank. She can feel each breath. Nina is here, and unafraid, and doesn’t finch or move when Ava positions the first bucket and starts milking her. The sensation of milking a cow is… strange, she’ll be honest. It’s warm and squishy and the sound of the milk on the metal pail is weird. But she’s doing something with herself, and Nina trusts her to do this without believing Ava will hurt her. Ava doesn’t want to hurt people. She doesn’t try to hurt people. She just wants to be loved, and Nina loves her in less than a day. At least, she has to, if she’s so calm at being milked.

“Good girl,” she praises as the first pail fills, and she moves onto the second. Isaac doesn’t live off it anymore, but Robin’s been strict about milking her every morning and most nights in order to keep her producing. Fresh farm milk is better, she had told Ava. Ava hasn’t sampled Nina’s milk and isn’t sure she’d like to, although come to think of it, this must be the milk she put in their eggs this morning. “Good girl.”

The second pail fills just as quickly, and they’re painfully heavy as Ava carries them back to the house to be properly bottled and chilled. She’s sweating more carrying them than she did actually milking Nina, and feels like she needs a shower already. She won’t take one. There’s too much else to be done, not including needing to drive into town and buy herself a water bottle so she doesn’t get dehydrated or something. It’s an obvious purchase she should have thought of before she even got here.

It’s another simple, easy task she can accomplish without too much thought. Drive into town. Buy a water bottle. Come back. And then she’ll likely be back to planting trees, filling in the beginnings of an orchard. An orchard would be nice to have around. She sees the appeal. They can sell it along with the eggs and corn that Robin already makes a decent living off of in the city once a week. There’s town, where basics can be acquired, and the city, where business happens and there’s enough people and cameras that Ava’s nervous about going to help Robin with the stand. It may be a duty of hers, she realizes. She won’t know until the weekend comes. 

But town, town she can handle, and she brings Connor’s photo with her as well as her wallet. She doesn’t know why, but it feels like abandonment to just leave her last memory of him at home. Crackling radio, shitty AC, they keep her company on the forty-five minute drive to the store, even though she speeds for most of the time. It makes her feel alive.

Everyone in town knows each other, she realizes almost immediately. The grocer and the customers chat, call each other by name with ease. People greet each other on the street. The bike by the liquor store doesn’t have a lock on it. They’re trusting and close, so everything about her will scream outsider, that she knows the second she gets out of her truck into the hot, dry air.

She leaves Connor’s photo tucked into the center console as she walks into the general store. It’s pathetically small, with little variety, compared to the splendor she had gotten used to in Chicago. Her choices for water bottles are disposable, thermos-like, or patterned with childish characters. Connor would laugh at the third option with her. She grabs a thick metal one and goes up to the front. Ten dollars, not too bad. But as she stands in line, listening to inane banter, her eyes land on what’s behind the counter. Cigarettes, in their neat rows and bright packages. She used to smoke in med school, but gave up the habit when she graduated because the cravings made her hands shake, and a surgeon needs steady hands.

Ava isn’t a surgeon anymore. She tilts her head up bravely and finds the package of her old go-to. They’re cheaper than in Chicago, and she appreciates that. And lighters are only a dollar, so she mentally adds that to the tab.

Does Robin smoke, she wonders? She doesn’t have a smoker’s voice, and Ava didn’t see her light up at all. Possibly because she’s never felt stress like Ava has. Lucky her. But now Ava has something familiar to bring with her, something to take the sting out of the bite, and she couldn’t be more relieved.

She sets her water bottle and a black lighter on the counter. “Marlboro Red, please,” she asks, and pulls bills out of her wallet.

-

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