#but ilyall and i have SO MUCH in the works | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

nakmor-leigh · 1 year

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I posted 9,805 times in 2022

170 posts created (2%)

9,635 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@infernalfae

@threefeline

@awi-usdi

@ironbullsmissingeye

@darkspawntaxcollectors

(ilyall 😘)

I tagged 896 of my posts in 2022

#rottmnt movie - 37 posts

#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles - 33 posts

#rise of the tmnt - 28 posts

#rottmnt - 26 posts

#baron draxum - 22 posts

#flashing lights - 13 posts

#😍😍😍 - 12 posts

#dragon age absolution - 10 posts

#rottmnt draxum - 9 posts

#self reblog - 9 posts

Longest Tag: 83 characters

#they don't care about your finances or how much you need your phone service to work

My Top Posts in 2022:

See the full post

266 notes - Posted July 18, 2022

So like, if Big Mama kidnapped Lou Jitsu and had him trapped in the Battle Nexus up until DRAXUM kidnapped and mutated him, does that mean human law enforcement has a cold case open for Lou Jitsu's disappearance???

273 notes - Posted July 23, 2022

Draxum might have had to choose between retreating with his people or staying with the Turtles

AND HE WOULD HAVE CHOSEN HIS FAMILY

313 notes - Posted August 7, 2022

Okay so i think it's WAY funnier and makes way more sense for the Turtles usage of "Big Brother" and "Little Brother" to be ENTIRELY literal.

They were all mutated on the same day at the same time. They're all actually the same age. But Raph is the biggest, so he's the BIG Brother. Donnie and Leo are mid sized, so they're the "middle" children. Mikey is the smallest, and so he's the "little" Brother

And it's ALL Splinter's fault. He started it

589 notes - Posted August 9, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Aight i keep seeing this and it's kinda ticking me off so I'm gonna try and change some minds

I've been seeing people site "Late Fee", where Splinter offers to reward the boys with a hug and the boys are enthusiastic and motivated by a hug, as evidence that Splinter is an awful parent

Have you considered that maybe he ACTUALLY raised the boys to just REALLY like hugs????

First, i was raised in a household with a VERY loving mom and a pretty abusive dad. Pulling teeth was easier than trying to get love from dad. But mom gave love like it was going out of style, and she ALSO would offer hugs as rewards for tasks done. I was JUST as enthusiastic as the boys because mom hugs were the BEST, not because i was desperate for them.

Second, the boys are ALWAYS hugging on each other, April, AND Splinter anyways ON SCREEN. It's so obvious that they're a super loving family. Kids don't just pick that up, that's something the adults in their life show them.

Like yeah, i know that Splinter isn't the BEST dad. He can be pretty lazy, but he's also the single parent of FOUR mutant children without any support structures and STILL manages to rarely blow up in anger at the boys (he'll start to get angry, then take a moment to calm down and collect himself), actively practices healthy communication, and regularly compliments the boys and tells them that he loves them. I have SEEN parental neglect and that is NOT IT. It's lazy parenting at WORSE

And before you say "Well Mikey said he doesn't know what Splinter's whiskers feel like!", bruh i think that's just a MIKEY thing. This is the same dude that eats peanut butter with his fingers while his brother has a PEANUT ALLERGY (you and me both Raph, you and me both)

845 notes - Posted September 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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ttlmt · 3 years

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goodnight. good things do happen.

#gn #nothing particular happened today #or yesterday i suppose #but im hopeful #i have SO much work to do today tho lmao sdlkjfhds #hopefully i get it done #itll be okay #anyway ilyall #sleep well and have a good day

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moirainedamodred · 5 years

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for making the world a brighter place... thank you. 6 YEARS WITH BTS

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srslysierraa · 2 years

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HAPPY NEW YEAR!

It's so nice being able to interact with you all despite all my screwups!! <|3

Cheers to a whole new year where hopefully i can get my shit together and stop posting stuff on accident before it's finished!!! I love all you so much i really really hope all of you have a good year ahead!! Nothing but pure happiness!

Reminder that you're valid and i am VERY proud of you being you! Thanks for reading this, ilyall!!!

ALSO!

Y'ALL CRAZY ASF. TYSM.

Fr tho it's been like 3 days or smth it went from 48 to 100+ wtffffff

To celebrate, i am making my first ever event!

Read below to know more!

IT'S NEW YEAR'S EVE HOORAY!!!

For the event, i will do this thing what i call;

╭・ෆ Floral Melody !!

• ➤ how this will work ;;

You will need to send me a name of a character, along with a song title, artist and a flower name. I will write and come up with a prompt on my own that fits all three categories.

-;; for example !!

1) kaedara kazuha + If The World Was Ending (JP Saxe) + water lily + one shot

;; and so i will write a one shot based off the things you've sent in! You can absolutely change one-shot to headcanons if you prefer headcanons!

Characters I'll write for ;;

TBHK → nene, hanako / amane, tsukasa, kou, teru, akane, shijima mei, sakura.

FNAF SB → g. freddy, montgomery gator, glamrock chica, sunnydrop / moondrop, gregory (child!reader).

Genshin Impact → every character excluding the children, barbara, paimon, lumine / aether, beidou, sara, zhongli, signora, shenhe, xingqiu, chongyun.

Danganronpa → chiaki, nagito, hajime, makoto, kyoko, celestia, kazuichi, rantaro, kokichi, shuichi, kaede, kiibo, tsumugi.

REMINDER ;;

I'll only be taking 10 of these! But as soon as i think i can do more, I'll make a batch 2!

(9/10)

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library-of-ohara · 2 years

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Anon requested

EXCITED FOR THIS. Talented authors collaborating? YES. I don't know if you guys write angst? But can I prettiest please request a senguko angst ab losing cora. Its cool if you guys dont write angst feel free to ignore ilyall. You guys deserve the world 🤍

Writing angst is not new to me and I love this idea so much. It never really occured to me to write how Sengoku would feel about Rosinante's death, so thank you for requesting this.

This was written by Didi [@usopp-writes]

Enjoy <3

Sengoku SFW Word account: 441 TW: Angst - death - dealing with lost of a loved one

Sengoku stared at the file in front of him, his heart racing for some unknown reason. It was the report from a certain island about the Ope Ope no Mi, a Devil Fruit they’d been willing to buy from pirates who didn’t understand its true value and possibilities. The fleet commander had known that the marines weren’t the only ones after the fruit and the short oral report had stated that the marines had failed. That was why he hesitated to read the file, knowing who else had been after the fruit and he feared what he would read in it.

No, it wasn’t out of fear that Donquixote Doflamingo now was in possession of the fruit, but out of fear to what had become of the youngest Donquixote brother, Rosinante. The young man was like a son to the fleet admiral and had been working as a spy for a long time, in the hopes of taking Doflamingo down. Of course it had been risky to send in Rosinante, even though it’d been obvious that he was the best person to do so. Certainly Doflamingo wouldn’t suspect his younger brother to be a marine spy, right?

Taking a deep breath, Sengoku opened the file. There was no way around it, it was his job to read it and decide the next step. Eyes skimmed over the first page. The marines hadn’t been able to land on the island at first, Doflamingo having used his powers to prevent them from moving ahead, much to their frustration.

It was not along report and yet it felt like he took forever to read it, dragging out the conclusion and end of this disaster. His breath stopped, as he read about the part when the marines had found the body of Rosinante. Tears prickled at the corner of his eyes at first, when he read about his adoptive son’s dead, described in a cold and blunt way. At first he refused to believe it to true, but there was no reason for them to falsify this information. Only a very few selected people even knew that Rosinante was a marine.

The tears started to float freely, as the harsh truth settled in his mind. He’d lost his son. He’d been shot multi times, though the cause of death probably had been due to blood lost. The only comfort in the report was the thrown in note that Rosinante had a smile on his lips when he’d died. It was bittersweet, but that little note was the comfort Sengoku would hold onto for years to come, whenever his thoughts ventured to the son he’d lost.

#sengoku #one piece #sfw #tw: angst #tw: death mention #tw: death #ohara library #didi answers

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beangyu · 7 years

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I H A V E 1 1 A S A I G N M EN TS D U E TH I S W EE K

#wont be uploading #sorry #I HAVE SO MUCH WORK ??#ILL BE INACTIVE FOR A WHILE ??#ILYALL

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foreverxdaydreaming · 2 years

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ik i havent replied to anything nor checked notifs in awhile but i just rly have not been feeling well lately or am always so busy and tired i don't have the time to so pls no one think im ignoring them im just like rly fuckin exhausted and anxious and i rly miss talking to you darlings but i wanna reply with energy and the want to converse and not just send out a half assed reply,,,, so i do apologize for being so sporadic i just have so much w/ work & uni rn that im hardly doing any fun stuff tbh 😔 😭

tldr i apologize for being so fucking bad with communication but ilyall and tysm to anyone who still puts up with me, i rly rly appreciate it sm 🙏🏻💕

#jj.txt #personal #delete later ?

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sugarbadluck · 4 years

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HELLO DUDES SUGAR HERE, im so sorry i been like super duper inactive :C (i miss yall so much AHHH) for the moment im super full working on commissions and in a project im making with some friends. annnd i wanted to talk a little about that!! im working in a SP project (with main theme some of craig gang and creek in general) i cant talk a lot about it for now but i hope that yall can stick around for this! were making it with a lot of love just for you all to enjoy it soon (we hope is very very soon, just you wait!) ILYALL SO MUCH, thanks for being here and enjoy my stuff, it means a lot, if i get some free time im gonna work again in my art request!! hope that everybody is safe and having a great great day -muack-

#talk about it make me super nervous but so happy #i really miss yall so much #THANKS FOR STICK AROUND AND ENJOY MY ART #myart #My Avatar #sp craig #Craig Tucker #sp tweek #Tweek Tweak #sp clyde #Clyde Donovan #south park #SP #SP Creek

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firewoodfigs · 3 years

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it’s Saturday (finally)! here’s my shoddy attempt at consistency and journaling, and a quick summary of my disorganised thoughts 💃 no, I’m lying. I read through it and it’s not all that quick because my tendency for verbosity knows no bounds

This week was a lot more hectic than the past two. I spent Monday to Wednesday doing research and compiling them together into a knowhow, but Thursday and Friday were the worst because I suddenly got swamped with emails. Both days I had to work till / beyond midnight, and I still have about 200 more pages of corporate documents to proofread... I wanna scream just thinking about it LOL. I’m grateful to have a job during an economic climate like this, but sometimes it feels like everything is addled with so much uncertainty that I just can’t help but wonder if I’m doing the right thing with my life :’)

I haven’t been using the computer as much, because a significant portion of my 24 hours is dedicated to using it, albeit for other less interesting purposes (also because my eyes are dying at the end of the day). And as a result, the rate at which I reply to messages and stuff have been slowing exponentially (I’m so, so sorry about this!!) but I’ll get to them soon <3 Just an update that your friendly chaotic online persona is still alive LMAO

My creativity feels incredibly stifled this week. I haven’t been able to write anything without second-guessing myself, or without being overcome by lethargy or restlessness or self-doubt, or a regrettable mixture of all 3. :’) Hopefully the weekend will be a good time to recharge. I’m not planning to touch any work this weekend since it’s not as urgent as the other matters were, but this might mean that I have to work till midnight again on Monday and Tuesday LOL. But it’s fine. Priorities, ykwim!! (Weekends are a luxury and I’m not going to waste it like this LOL)

Date nights on Thursdays are so much better than date nights on Fridays, although it does tend to make us both feel like the weekend is already here 😆 I mean, the fact that it’s so much less crowded is already a big plus to me. I know people call me out all the time for being a paranoid hen and whatnot, but I just freak out when people come too close to me in public in a blatant disregard of the concept of social distancing (one of my biggest pet peeves is also when people remove their masks to sneeze or cough in the open, which happens a lot here. I mean, you might as well not wear a mask, or you might as well just stay... at... home...). Also a lot of restaurants mark up prices on Friday nights and we got to escape that >:)

I’m very thankful I got to squeeze in some time to spend with my bf and a couple of friends despite the sheer busyness of everyone’s week. The transition feels so surreal, and I know it’s been a lot harsher on some of my other friends too, than it has been for me. I’m glad that we at least have each other to vent to and struggle with, just like we did back in law school. Easier to struggle together than alone. :’)

On a related note, some thoughts I had about love and understanding last night - I think it’s easy to find love, if we just look hard enough and put aside the premium that society places on romantic love. Love comes in so many different forms - a simple gesture like a short text, an exchange of memes, an invitation to check out a new cafe together; from so many different sources - whether intrinsic or extrinsic, whether platonic or familial. But being understood has always felt like a privilege to me. A lot of times people just tend to think that I’m too “unexpectedly” deep or emotional or sensitive or intelligent, that I have a “surprising” amount of problems for someone who always seems so bubbly, or that I’m just downright eccentric (the last one is completely valid though LMAO). But I’m just so, so grateful to have people in my life who can understand me on an emotional, psychological and intellectual level, and that I don’t have to explain or justify myself for feeling a certain way because they just get it. It’s... validating. Different, in a good way. It’s so important to me because I truthfully don’t talk about my feelings a lot, although I’m trying to now because constant suppression is just a set-up for an inevitable explosion. :’)

I got my pay check, and!!! The first thing I did was to set up a separate savings account and deposit a decent portion of my salary there so that I won’t touch it for the rest of the month (hopefully) :’) I also got to pay off a small bit of my current outstanding debts, which is great. I'm really looking forward to the day I finally clear all my liabilities. But yes, I think my 19-year-old self would’ve been very proud of myself for not spending it recklessly hahaha. I used to have terrible, and I mean really terrible, fiscal management skills. Like, when I was in first year and second year I was tutoring a ton of people, but somehow my funds were just always depleting uncontrollably. It only dawned upon me much later that I was not conscious or cautious when it came to my spending habits (s/o to my bf and friends for explaining this to me and for teaching me how to manage my finances!!! ilyall), and that I really didn’t have a habit of saving for rainy days or for the future, in general. I watched this documentary about how people from less privileged socioeconomic backgrounds tend to fall into this trap of ‘tunnel vision’, sans wanting to splurge on everything while they can because they never had the chance to do so in the past, or because they’re afraid that they won’t be able to do so in the future once the money’s gone. Being poor is also expensive because it means you might miss out on deals e.g. if buying 2 items is $2x-y, vs buying 1 which is $x, you might be more inclined to buy just 1 instead because it’s all you can afford at the moment. It definitely struck me hard, because I think when I first got all that money I didn’t think of saving it. I just wanted to buy a ridiculous amount of stuff (and real trashy stuff, because I used to think that quantity > quality especially when it came to clothes) and ~ treat myself ~ for roughing it out in law school, but hey, there are other ways to treat oneself apart from excessive splurging :^)

My biggest treats this week were the arrival of my books (I ordered The Queen’s Gambit and Grapes of Wrath and I might just disappear from the face of this planet lmao), getting to spend quality time with my loved ones and getting to catch the sunset on my evening strolls! I’m gonna end this long ramble with a few pics of them ✨ stay safe and take care, everyone, and have a wonderful weekend!!! *hugs*

#not fma #personal #also the fact that I still get 8 hours of sleep a day is nothing short of a miracle #also not saying we can’t buy nice things!! just... everything in moderation (LMAO what am I a health pyramid)

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argodeon · 5 years

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Disclaimer: I'm not a therapist but it works for me. I am not liable for any wigs snatched and/or damages this post somehow caused.

Being sad/depressed/or just having negative emotions in general, for whatever reason, can fuck you up regardless of your situation to the point it can demotivate you on doing something that makes you happy, or even just thinking of positive things. That being said, here's my tip: Put up a sticky note or two about positive things you, things that happened to you, and/or just about anything positive that would deffo make you happy just by reading it. AVOID self deprecation ffs, keep it short and readable, and put it somewhere you look at everyday.

Flatter yourself with honesty! I don't want to share numbers bc I'm not trynna brag rn

I have a digital one and I keep it covering my rainmeter clock (Ultralight by Adryano Maciel) so I get to see it whenever I try to check the time. The date is just below the clock but I'm not in the mood to show you atm bc I'm too distracted by those delicious meaty trees (by Jakob Owens on Unsplash).

Negative emotions stop me from thinking and remembering good shit. I can't acccess the internet all the time so forcing myself to read this note whenever shit happens really relieves me. All of your supportive messages really make my days even fucking better. ilyall so much ;w; <33

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miraimisu · 5 years

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5, 23, 45, and 50 for the fanfic author ask??

Ask me anything fanfic-related!

5. Is there any fic that makes you super happy to reread and remember you wrote that?

I mean a few? I’m super fond of my fics for lona week because it was the first time I participated in a shipping week (tho I’m a shipping veteran lmao). I’m also thrilled to be writing what I’m writing right now because it’s a test of discipline and I reread what I wrote months ago constantly, so.

If there’s one fic I’m EXTREMELY fond of though that would have to be Hibernation. My first lona fic. A blessing ah ;; I’m always like ‘thank GOD you wrote that and dipped into the fandom look at all these people’ I’m very eep

23. What’s the nicest review you’ve ever gotten?

I can’t really recall right now but I once wrote a pretty dark fic where I killed people off and people loved it, and the reviews were absolutely heart-warming. I would have to scavenge to find one in particular but this is one I have saved in my folders and:

45. If you had to call yourself an author of a single genre (besides fanfic) what label would you give yourself?

I suppose right now I’d go for the Adventure label, mystery as a secondary and probably romance third. I love fluff and I used to go hard into angst BUT I’m a completely harmless bean now hehe :)

50. Has writing fanfic had a significant impact on your life? Would you say it’s entirely positive?

[can of wormholes ahead as you v nicely called it in garlic cloves, goomz]

I can’t really say that the experience has been entirely positive nor negative, but I would say writing some fanfics loyally fucked me up mentally. Granted, lots of the friends I had back then were absolutely morally bankrupt and offered little to no support. I have written fanfics long beyond belief that destroyed me for how long it took me to finish them, and I have written fanfics that lifted me up and made me happy.

Writing These Stones We Skip destroyed me from inside out far beyond imaginable. I put tremendous work into it and put too much pressure on myself to get it done while I was struggling with Not Good Stuff. Each chapter took months to write because I had absolutely no discipline and my mental situation was making it all worse. In this case, writing probably added more fuel to the fire, and the atmosphere I was in wasn’t the healthiest either. I was too eager about reviews and validation in general, and when I never got it… it really destroyed my morale. It was horrible. My closest friends weren’t willing to help me out either, and whenever I asked for help, I would sometimes get very unwanted criticism.

In general, it has always been more about the fandoms and the atmosphere rather than writing. Sitting down to write is fine and dandy, but when it comes to publishing and interacting with others… dude. I have been in fandoms of terrible competition and unhealthy pressure. It was sickening. Some fandoms are aggressive as fuck when it comes to establishing oneself into a fandom and just doing your thing. Writing is fine; but publishing and turning writing into a coin of competition was an absolute nightmare.

Though, most of my positive experiences come from the lona fandom (kisses kisses ilyall) and some from back then, too. I have grown a lot from having my ass kicked a handful of times, but I would say that my current self is my best self in terms of writing experience. I have always had fun when I wrote just for the sake of writing, and that’s what made the experience so worth it when I was, idk, 12? And I’m back to those roots now and I’m having lots of fun.

TL;DR: it’s been both. It’s great now, it wasn’t this way before, but writing has always helped me out to simply unleash my imagination because I’m a bit of a creative mess. So, yeah. I love writing, but competitive fandoms can go burn, lol.

#ask #oops #got a lil angsty there but because I'm in a good place now I can talk about it

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andrews-a-fool · 5 years

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Sorry I just spat out Begonia because thot! Anyways here's the full list: Candytufts, Common Boneset, Garden Cosmos :)), Glory-of-the-Snow, Primrose!!, Tulip, and Sunflower! Love you, Andrew

Candytufts: When do you feel most loved?

talking to my friends,, :’o> like if we’re all together or at least all talking together and we’re all on the same page about some stupid shit jfsflskdjflksjf

Common Boneset: What are you looking forward to?

getting my driver’s license!! im scheduled for my test on wednesday >:3 i can finally go get stuff in town w out having to drag a parent along and/or plan anything

Garden Cosmos: How was your day today?

ii lvoe u.,, im having a good day today!! i only woke up like 2 and a half hours ago sfkjsdhfjkshdkjgkjf but i’ve been hanging out reading and i got to sleep in which was nice bc. ive been working and have had to get up on time since june. im planning on playing guitar later bc my grandparents got me best of the 70s guitar chords & tab and im trying to learn crazy on you by heart!! (or at least the acoustic part of it) ilysm mandala,,

Glory-of-the-Snow: What are ten things that make you happy/you’re grateful to have in your life?

1. you!!

2. butter :’o) (MY DOG BEFORE ANYONE ASKS)

3. my dad’s bigass flannel shirt that i took

4. my ziploc bag of art supplies!!!

5. spotify

6. the slowly growing circle of mutuals sdfkhdskfh ilyall!

7. the cotton candy ice cream i have in the freezer

8. american gods! im really enjoying reading it :o)

9. stone got me a really sweet sea turtle stuffed animal for my birthday and it makes me :’O> to see it

10. my friends !! avery and you and koios and ava and aiko and andra and binks & andy, and ofc maddie and violet & the rest of plearth gang, and laurel <33

Primrose: Describe your ideal life.

uhh oh shit!! time to like. yearn. no one read this

ok plan cancelled i just spent 5 straight minutes staring into space and the yearning was too much fhsdkjhfkjdshfkdsfkjdsg

i would really love to have a big house in the middle of the country (Not texas country, somewhere in either an ideal america so i can fulfill the cowboy desires in montana or the midwest or germany near where florian lives in the south) with friends nearby where we get to meet up all together at least weekly, and have something to take care of & give a concrete purpose to my life without having to worry too much abt the future bc, i crave stability and routine. and horses sometimes. but anyway someday a rascal comes onto my property & we fall in love

Tulip: What would be the best present to get you?

good omens the book. this has been a monthlong ordeal. please put it directly into my gay little hands

sjfdkjhjskdf ok for real? a sweet handwritten letter or a mixtape or something made w the heart,, i

Sunflower: What is something you don’t want to imagine life without?

hope for the future--like in the politics and environmental sense but also in a personal way, whether it’s hope that things will stay somewhat the same if i’m doing well, or if it’s hope and trust that i’ll continue to be better and better versions of myself, that i can and will continue to help other people if i can, & most of all that i and the people i love will be happy

i lvoe u so much mandala!!!!! this post is so out of control shfjsdhf. no one read this

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ursoself-satisfying · 5 years

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an OC sneak peek [2/?]

ok heres another w the accompanying oc!!! its ginger n maryanne 4ever!!!!! i lov them sm!!!!! but anyway heres another excerpt from around the same time n its MORE angst n I hope u like my vagueness lol,, PLEASE GIVE ME FEEDBACK!!! LEMME KNO WHAT U THINK!!!! ilyall enjoy ::””)) IM GONNA PREFACE THIS W THE FACT THAT IK IRL BRIAN IS A PURE MAN N THIS WOULD NEVER HAPPEN N ANITA IS A GODDESS BUT THIS IS JUST FOR THE DRAMA ITS TOTAL FICTION I MEAN ABSOLUTELY NO DISRESPECT TOWARDS ANY OF THEM its got some cheating ig so be aware that anita is my mom n the loml pls dont call me out ::((

---

“Anything to drink?” He asked casually, causing the girl to squirm in her seat. Her discomfort was amusing to him, as she was the one who had traveled out in the first place. She was present of her own volition but acted as though her emotions had such an irresistible hold on her, or rather Brian did, that she was there out of a primal need rather than any conscious decision.

“No- No, I’m ok, thank you.” The tall man glanced back at her with a soft, sad air about him. This feeling often came with their interactions as of late, despite their past. He averted his gaze from her body and turned his attention on pouring himself some tea instead. They existed in simple silence for a few moments, the only sound in the small kitchen was that of the kettle on the stove and the pouring of boiling water in his cup. He stood at the counter and took a long sip before turning slowly to sit across from his unsolicited guest. A feather soft smile graced his lips as he took her in. Even in an unfortunate situation, she was unbelievable, the same as ever.

The woman bit her lip before leaning forward and uncrossing her tense legs, “So, uh, wh-”

Brian set his drink down with a small clink on the table, the sound meant to interrupt her question. He just stared into the hot earthy contents for a moment and stirred it slowly. “Anita’s at her semi-annual retreat this week without me.” He cleared his throat, “I couldn’t spare the time between the post-production bustle and having to prepare for the cosmos convention.” His smile was thin and he took a sip of his tea before continuing, “I’m home alone for a while,” his eyes traced the woman’s silhouette before meeting her gaze as she was doing the same to him, “but I think you knew that.”

“Look-” She started quietly, but ultimately she could maintain the eye contact long enough to finish and slouched for a second instead. Ginger looked down at his comment, avoiding the aim of his accusatory glance. With a huff, she sat up and turned to face suddenly face him directly. “Maryanne kicked me out for the night.”

The elder of the two raised his brows and put his cup down with a concerned expression. “She kicked you out?” He asked incredulously.

The redhead swallowed, “Shes ‘moving on’.” She spat her words at him with a clear distaste for her lovers choice of actions as well as words.

The long fingers of the guitarist slid across the table and laid open for an embrace. Ginger glanced up at him cautiously before deciding his soft eyes held genuity and she laced her hand in his. The tips of his digits wrapped around her like they were made to fit with one another. Her hands in his caused a wave of emotions to ripple from the contact and Brian could barely handle it. He sniffled and slowly let his thumb slide over the never aging skin of the woman he once adored, and though he would tell himself otherwise, he still adored.

“I'm sorry,” he began, but she shook her head violently with an angry frown. She unintentionally squeezed his outstretched hand but he squeezed right back.

“Don't be. She’s just-” Ginger sighed, “She's different now, you know?”

Her aura slowly shifted from that of deep warm hues to softer cooler tones, from red and oranges to blues and purples like a dying flame coming down from its hottest point. Brian could feel the shift shoot through her and he prepared himself to stand and hold her the minute she needed him to.

Ginger looked up to meet Brian's sympathetic stare. He had always been the key to their emotions and it unlocked some kind of flood gate in her. She could feel it rush all at once in seemingly every part of her body. “I just don't wanna lose her, Brian!” She let it our like a gust of wind from her mouth, a storm of repressed worried. “I can't-! Not like I lost you!”

Just as he knew he would be needed, the man stood and went to her side. She stood as he approached and let him engulf her in his long arms as tears escaped and ran down her already red cheeks. She was shaking, having no way to handle or process the realization their return had thrust upon her. Brian held her sobbing head close in his chest, stroking her short hair and tightening his limbs protectively around her warm body. She could feel him place a small kiss on her head, whispering and cooing to her as he once had long ago, “Hush now, it'll all be alright, my darling girl,” his voice would waver now and again as he calmed her, “my sweet, beautiful, darling, darling, girls.” The smaller hands of the woman held dependently to the collar of his sweater and she choked back a final sob before attempting to speak again.

Her small voice came out with a rasp, raw from her cries, as she tilted her head back to meet the eyes of her familiar love, “We made things work, Brian. Why can't we just be like that again?” She pleaded with shining green eyes that took the man to another scene for a moment, one of discovery and firsts, one full of ecstasy and elation, but one so different than his present. “We were happy, Harold. Why can't we be happy again?” A weak attempt at a smile graced her lips at the loosening of her tongue, unfolding the old name like opening an old scrapbook.

Had her hands not been traveling up his changed face to tether him to his physical body, her use of his other name, so intimate and exclusive, would have had him lost right then and there in the sensation she provided. She cradled his face and her shaking lips begged to be kissed, tangling her fingers in his grey curls to entice him. Drifting closer and closer until he was bent to breathe down her neck, the temptation became too much.

It may have started at the neck but it moved in hot streaks from the necks to jaws to lips on lips. While Ginger's hands were preoccupied with the buttons of his shirt, Brian’s were holding her as close to him as he could, sprawled out on her back dangerously close to her ass. She mapped out his chest with the tips of her nails while her tongue did the same with his mouth. Nothing needed to be mapped, really, because for her it was like walking down a road to your first home. Even after you've left it, you'll always remember how to get there, no matter how much shrubbery grows over the path or how long it goes unattended. Brian was their home and they always seemed to find their way back to him, regardless of the distance put between them.

Brian thought she was exactly the same. Everything about her physically was just as she was when she left him. He then pulled away at the reemergence of that memory. As he separated from her, she mewled in protest, the loss of connection cold on her. That was right, though, she had left and he had stayed. Years and years had gone by and he had made a life for himself, more of a life, or in the very least a life without them.

“Brian,” Ginger moaned, trying to snake her arms back around his neck, “baby, what's wrong?” Her eyes were closed and her shirt was half haphazardly pushed up but her exposure only made Brian suddenly feel sicker.

“You know what's wrong, my love.” His languid fingers worked to pry her needy form off him with much difficulty. Her pouts turned to frowns and he gently, if not reluctantly, pulled her clothes back in place on her but she swatted him away as he spoke. “Ginger, darling, all of this is what's wrong.”

He motioned to them, to the empty house, to the hairs sticking to her face like sunny, golden, cherubic looking locks. She was glowing, but wasn't she always? She was in his eyes but that only made it all harder. “What?” She spat, “That- That I still love you? That's wrong?”

So much of it hurt him but he- He had to. It was really the only acceptable course of action. The teenager in him beat on his heart like Roger on a gong and begged and pleaded for there to be another way, for him to run away with her like he was 17 again, but he was old and his heart no longer reverberated in his chest like it used to. “You're the most intelligent creature I've ever encountered, my love. You know why all this is wrong.”

The tears returned and rolled down her face in record time as she bit her lip. “Why can't things go back to the way they were? It was perfect-”

He sighed, “The world is always changing-”

“I love you, Brian Harold May! And you still love me! I know you do! Isn’t that what you taught us?” With calculated steps, she aimed to close the distance between them but the older man kept her at arms distance now. “If we're in love then we should be together!” With every word, her speech became less and less intelligible through her sobs. “I just- I don’t understand!”

His heart shook as it shattered in his chest at her final words, a final crash to end an epic saga. “Things are a lot more complicated now, Ginger. You'll understand someday-” He held back his own tears and watched her pace the floor in front of him.

“Don't be so fucking condescending!” She snapped, stopping to look him in the eyes, the same eyes she saw when she first arrived. They were the only consistent thing in her long life, the love he held in his gaze. It softened her against her will. She wanted to be angry, not for the first time ever, but for the first time for personal reasons.

Brian paused at this. He had never seen her exhibit this much emotion before especially not aggression. All this time and he wasn't sure if he’d ever seen her this mad. “I'm sorry-”

“Don't be.” There she was. She was back to being cold. Face dry and slack, she was a woman of logic and decision. She collected herself and her things, jackets, and bags scattered around the room, refusing any help or assistance offered by Brian.

He didn't do a thing to stop her in the end. He knew she would find somewhere else to go, to stay, someone else to keep her warm. He had no doubt about that. She was well loved and well read, but ignorant in the ways of society. He worried but he couldn't have stopped her if he’d wanted to anyway. He desperately wanted to, but he knew the second his skin sparked on hers again he wouldn't be able to stop this time. No one in his life deserved that, his kids didn't deserve a father like that and his wife, God, she deserved more than he was being right then.

The door closed with a slam and Brian watched from the window as she got in her car but she didn't leave. She just sat there, hunched over her steering wheel and what he could only assume was yelling. Her mouth was wide and her eyes were shut tightly. He hadn't even realized the tears falling from his own eyes. He didn't wait for her to leave, he couldn't take the site of her any longer, not here not like this.

Behind some of his amps, Brian kept a box. It was filled with old photos, some bits of clothing, and all sorts of pieces of art. His favorite, of course, was the photos though. There they were, all together, smiling and in love. The three of them, they were- They were unstoppable, untouchable. It was golden with them, always. God, he thought how did it come to this? How could their story have arrived at this conclusion? And all Brian could assume was that this simply wasn't yet the conclusion.

#queen #bohemian rhapsody #borhap #she has a voice!!!#bohrhap #new blog #brian may #mine #fanfic #not queen #personal #nut #friends #angst #oc #original character #ginger

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james-bucky-barnackle · 6 years

Text

random story

before anything: i just want to say sorry for not updating any of my fics, i have an explanation and i will post it as soon as im able, as for now thank you to everyone whos read it, reading it, and will read it!

Okay, back to my story. Went on tinder bc hello, then found this cute guy which felt like the male version of me. He felt really okay, and we didn't talk consistently, meaning: reply after reply. Which I honestly didn't mind, but of course it would've been okay if we both responded fast to each other's texts.

He asked me out and I haven't given him a date, because I'm very much slumped in work and school right now. I can't even have 3 hours to myself without being texted by my boss or my schoolmates. We talked on the phone and it was honestly fun, he's a real funny guy. And if you guys haven't been an avid reader of my personal blog, (which if u want to - is linked on my bio) I am such a huge flirt. Mostly because I've had my heart broken before, badly and some family issues I won't dive into this text post. But bottom line is, I'm the toughest girl you can imagine, or at least that's what I think. I never really let anyone in, even when I spend so much time with someone, it never really registers to me as anything.

So when this tinder guy put out a disclaimer about: Hey, I'm not the commitment type of person blablabla, I still want to continue flirting with you but not guarantee exclusivity. I laughed my pants off, honestly. Idk how tinder is on the other parts of the world, but in the Philippines, it's pretty much an automatic that anyone you meet there will ghost you in a few days or weeks if you're lucky to last that long. I mean, I have friends who met their boyfriends there, but it rarely really happens. So when this guy told me this, it sort of ruined the vibe for me. I know he was trying to be nice and put a disclaimer out, but I've been through so much that I basically invented ghosting (im not proud of it, but its true).

I joked and told him, if u want to leave u can honestly just ghost me, and I'd appreciate that. I felt our age gaps suddenly form. This is funny because I'm just one year older than him, but back in my day, there wasn't a Senior High school curriculum, we just had high school and that's it. He had two more years of that shit. I started college at 15 and am now soon going to graduate (thank God!) and he's a freshman now. With the age, there's not much of a difference, but with the emotional growth of having to be forced to mature at an early age made me feel older than him.

It was his fresh out of high school self that thought oh this might be cool to tell her, cos I don't want to hurt her, but it ended up just making things funny and petty. This was honestly me when he told me that

I was livid, and I get mean sometimes, but I just didn't HAHAHAHA IM SORRY FUCK. I just was like??? Just enjoy it while it lasts boo, you don't have to say anything. Just do you, mama's a big girl, for all I know, I could be the one to ghost him.

Ghosting is never a good thing, I want to let that out. But I just didn't like the fact that he even thought there was a need to tell me that. And now he pleaded for us to be normal again, and I'm like?

I don't want to be a bad person, but I told him I'd be free on Wednesday, and ladies - we bout to be what we in the PH call "TOTGA" or the one that got away. And I'm excited, I tbh really liked him, but the audacity. I'm bout to give him the best date of his life and make him regret he even bothered to say it.

ANY DATE IDEAS??? LMAO ILYALL

Post note: there's alot more that happened when he told me to like beware of me blablabla but it would take years to finish this post so... Sigh, boys who think theyre such fuckboys. I think this one falls into the category of the Nice Fuckboy (do look it up).

#update #personal #fuckboy problems #ask me #mawiwritesstuff #story time

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