I want to see an au where none of the batfam are superheros except for Bruce.
None of the backstories are different and they all act the same but they're just normal people who happen to be batman's kids. Bats is trying his hardest to stop them fighting crime but it is extremely difficult. The police and JLA don't know anything about the family and have absolutely no idea why Bruce Wayne's kids follow Batman around.
More details and scene ideas under the cut!
Batman tries to give reports to Gordon while kid Dick does flips behind him because he got bored and followed him.
Bruce having to lock all the doors and windows before he leaves to stop Dick trying to fight people (sometimes it works but only if Alfred is there to watch him)
B fights joker while little Jason sits in the batmobile waiting because he was sick and got sent home from school early.
(Jason would still die, because the storyline works pretty well even if he isn't Robin and he'd still come back bc Talia felt bad for her ex but he wasn't trained)
Jay coming back and instead of killing people, he's just really bitchy and throws stuff at Tim. He tries to make B kill joker the same way but he's less threatening because he isn't trained and is just wearing regular jeans and a shirt.
Tim making B adopt him because "you need someone to make sure you don't forget to look after yourself and so you have someone to use as a fill-in kid so that you don't go crazy from" which isn't different to the og but it's just some random kid this time, nothing to do with crime fighting.
Tim goes to a JLA meeting (Alfred wasn't able to babysit) and makes fun of other people's ideas. They are all very confused about who's kid this is and how he got there
Steph and Cass just moving into the manor because their families are shit and it was nice. Both have the same backstories but B stops them fighting anyone else. Idk enough about them to make scenes but imagine them.
Damian was raised the same way, when Talia gave him to Bruce he stopped Dami killing but also just stopped him fighting people fully.
Damian going to Kent farm and Superman trying his hardest to hide information from him, not knowing that Dami already knows it all.
Adult Dick and Jason stealing B's equipment so that their sibling fights are 'more fun' and both ending up in the hospital. They claim they found the equipment on the streets because Batman left it behind
Tim and Damian watching B through the security cameras and texting him their ideas. (They'd get along better because no one is Robin but there'd probably still be some sibling rivalry)
If this is a thing please send me fic recs!
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random bleach time travel inccorect quotes from an AU I will probably never write (Ichigo becomes soul king post tybw cause yhwach body doesn’t hold up and then time travels to the Turn back the pendulm era for reasons I’m too lazy to explain)
Ichigo joined Squad 6 under Ginrei Kuchiki in this AU
...
Ichigo: *likes sitting in the sun, hates the rain, touch starved but still prickly enough to pretend he doesn’t like it ‘cause he was soul king for three years and barely had any proper human contact for all that time, has weird eyes and other weird traits from his hollow*
Hiyori + Kaien: *spying on him*
Ichigo: *straight hissed at someone who got to close when he was injured*
Hiyori: *ticks something else off on the list of reasons why Ichigo might be a cat in human form*
Yoruichi, the real cat shapeshifter:
...
Love: Isn’t it weird that we pay money to see other people?
Ichigo: Plane tickets?
Shinji: Concert tickets?
Lisa: Prostitution?
Love, holding holding his broken sunglasses: Glasses.
...
Hollowified!Shinji: *Screams*
Hollowified!Hiyori: *Screams louder to assert dominance*
Kisuke, concerned: Should we do something?!
Ichigo, observing: *thinking back to his hollow training and how much the Visored fucked with him for fun*
Ichigo: Nah, I want to see who wins this.
...
Kensei: Dammit, Mashiro!
Mashiro: What?! It wasn’t me!
Kensei: Sorry, force of habit. Dammit, Shinji!
Shinji: Not me either.
Kensei: Oh...Then who destroyed the entire training ground?
Ichigo + Kaien who thought it would be fun to spar but went a little too far:
...
Ichigo: *Gently taps table*
Kaien: *Taps back*
Hiyori: What are they doing?
Kisuke: Morse code.
Ichigo: *Aggressively taps table*
Kaien: *Slams hands down* YOU TAKE THAT BACK-
...
*Lieutenants on a mission*
Kaien: I think we're missing something.
Lisa: Teamwork?
Hiyori: Cohesion?
Ichigo: A general sense of what the fuck we’re doing?
Kaien: ... Where’s Mashiro?
Mashiro: *fighting a bear in a forest three districts away*
Lisa:
Hiyori:
Ichigo: ... Fuck
Kensei: *in Squad 9 barracks* I S E N S E A D I S T U R B A N C E
...
Shinji: Tonight, one of you has betrayed us.
Kisuke: Is it me?
Shinji: No, it’s not you.
Tessai: Is it me?
Shinji: It’s not you either.
Aizen: Is it me, Captain?
Shinji, dying because of Hollowification:
Shinji, mockingly: Is IT mE CaPTaIN?
...
Kyouraku: How did none of you hear what I just said?
Kisuke: I’ve been dissociating for the past two and a half hours.
Ukitake: I got distracted about halfway through.
Lisa: Ignoring you was a conscious decision.
...
Ichigo: Can I be frank with you guys?
Kaien: *confused* Sure, but I don’t see how changing your name is gonna help.
Mashiro: Can I still be Mashiro?
Shinji: Shh, let Frank speak.
Ichigo:
Ichigo: *lunges at Shinji*
...
Ichigo: *trying not to laugh* Tell Kensei about the birds and the bees.
Mashiro: *serious* They're disappearing at an alarming rate
...
Yoruichi: Soifon, keep an eye on Kisuke today. He’s going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.
Soifon: Sure, I’d love to see Urahara get punched.
Yoruichi: Try again.
Soifon, sighing: I will stop Urahara from getting punched
...
*The Visored+ Hollowified!Kaien is getting into a car*
Ichigo: *the only one who know how to drive* I’m driving
Mashiro, out of view: Shotgun!
Kaien, turning to face Mashiro: Aww! But you had it on the way here-
Everyone except Mashiro: WOAH-
Mashiro, holding a shotgun: No! I found a shotgun! And I want the front seat! *Pumps gun*
...
Lisa: In your opinion, what’s the height of stupidity?
Hiyori: *turning to Shinji* How tall are you?
...
Kaien:
Ichigo:
Kaien: In my defense--
Ichigo: You have no defense you let Byakuya meet Gin
Kaien: but--
Ichigo: Byakuya. The same cocky shit that tries to fight anything that moves fast enough. And Gin. The creepy shit that thought it was a good idea to work with megalomaniac rather than talk to people
Kaien: You don’t have any room to talk about bad communication but in hindsight it wasn’t my greatest idea--
Ichigo: understatement of the century
Kaien: But I was bored and you have to admit it was a little funny
Ichigo:
Ichigo: *covering his face because the sight of baby Byakuya getting punted into the Kuchiki Koi pond by baby Gin was actually hilarious but he refuses to admit it* I hate you
...
Kensei: I sometimes drink milk straight out of the container
Mashiro: the COW?
Kensei:
...
Kisuke: You have to apologize to Shinji
Hiyori: Fine.
Hiyori: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.
...
Kaien: I told Ichigo his ears turn red when he lies
Mashiro: Why?
Kaien: So I can do this
Kaien: Hey, Ichigo! Do you love us?
Ichigo, covering his ears: No.
Mashiro: Aw, Berry-tan
Ichigo: Shut up, seaweed brain!
...
*Shinji and Kisuke sitting in jail together*
Shinji: So who should we call?
Kisuke: I’d call Hiyori, but I feel safer in jail
...
Shinji: Hey, how old are you?
Ichigo: Twenty-four--
Ichigo *remembers that the soul society doesn’t have the same age system*
Ichigo: two hundered
Shinji:
Shinji, concerned: did you just say--
Ichigo, nervously: TWO HUNDRED
...
Shinji: What do you think Ichigo will do for a distraction?
Kaien: He’ll probably, like, make a noise or throw a rock. That’s what I would do.
*several building explode due to Getsuga Tensho*
Kaien: ... or he could do that.
...
Kisuke: I know you’re a time traveler, Kurosaki-san
Ichigo: (Play dumb!)
Ichigo: Who's Kurosaki?
Ichigo: (NOT THAT DUMB!!!)
...
Love: What's a word thats a mix between 'sad' and 'mad'?
Kensei: Disgruntled, miserable, desolated-
Mashiro: Smad
Kaien: Ichigo
Ichigo:...
...
Shinji: Who thinks I can fit 15 marshmallows in my mouth?
Kensei: You’re a hazard to society
Hiyori: And a coward. DO TWENTY.
...
Ichigo, babysitting: Violence isn't the answer.
Byakuya: You’re right.
Ichigo: *sighs in relief*
Byakuya, reaching for a brick: Violence is the question.
Ichigo: What?
Byakuya, running to hit Gin on the head with a brick: And the answer is yes.
Ichigo, running after him: NO-
Ginrei, watching the chaos while drinking tea: ... Today’s a beautiful day
...
Kisuke: *Accidentally hits Hiyori in the face*
Kisuke: *Trying to decide between saying 'I’m fucking sorry' and 'Are you okay'*
Kisuke: ARE YOU FUCKING SORRY?!
Hiyori, confused: What’s wrong with you?!
Shinji: *wheezing in the background*
...
Ichigo: Can you please be serious for five minutes?
Mashiro: My record is four, but I think I can do it.
...
Kaien: Do you think different paints have different tastes?
Mashiro: They do.
Ichigo: ... Why did you say that with such certainty?
...
Shinji: I was born for politics. I have great hair and I love lying.
...
Kisuke: I’d like to offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals.
...
Kaien: Treat spiders the way you want to be treated.
Ichigo: Killed without hesitation.
Kaien: No.
...
Kisuke: *Kicks the door down looking panicked*
Ichigo: What did you do?
Kisuke: Nobody died.
Ichigo: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT?!
...
Kaien, euphoric from his date with Miyako: Date someone who will drag you outside at 3am to look at the stars.
Kukaku: If anyone, and I mean anyone, wakes me up at 3am to go look at the damn sky they will be removed indefinitely from my life.
...
Aizen, trying to be friends with Ichigo b4 he died: I made tea.
Ichigo: I don’t want tea.
Aizen: I did not make tea for you. This is my tea.
Ichigo: Then why are you telling me?
Aizen: It is a conversation starter.
Ichigo: That’s a lousy conversation starter.
Aizen: Oh, is it? We are conversing. Checkmate.
Ichigo:
Ichigo: *two seconds away from a homicide
...
Mashiro: what is it called when you kill your friend
Ichigo: Amicicide
Kensei: Murder
Mashiro: Homiecide
...
Ichigo: *looks like Kaien and Isshin*
Kaien: *suspicious but has no proof*
Ichigo, lying becuase he doesn’t want to deal with the emotions that come with seeing Isshin again: I’m not a Shiba
Ichigo: *uses Getsuga Tensho*
Kaien, throwing a table: oKAY, I CALL BULLSHIT
...
Ichigo: *having a chill day in Rukongai by himslef
baby Rukia, Renji, and their gang: *chased by a merchant they stole from*
Ichigo:
Ichigo: *adopts them*
...
Okay, that’s more than enough for one post
Yes, Kaien is hollowfied here because I want him to be, yes, I really like adding animalistic traits to characters I love don’t ask me why
This is so much longer than I planned but it was too fun to stop
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hi i'd like to know about your transfem fuuta thoughts please. if that's ok
"if that's ok" as if I haven't been rotating transfem fuuta in my mind for a long time and dying for an excuse to post something 👀👀👀 Thank you so much Ah!! I was able to format my little ideas and headcanons into an actual write-up, I just love this concept so much! All the big murderous twists in the series and I’ll never get over it is what it is...
So, as much as I enjoy headcanons about some big revelation moment, I think that Fuuta Terminally Online Kajiyama has been very aware of his identity for a while. He just never really got the motivation to do anything about it. He knows he's not completely satisfied with his gender, but isn't constantly suffering over it, so he thinks telling people/transitioning would be way too much of a hassle at that point in his life. He also struggles with people taking him seriously given his height, attitude, etc -- unconsciously he's also worried it will only make matters worse in that area.
He wouldn't dare say anything to his parents, and wants to avoid hassle with his friends. People paint them as judgy incels sometimes, but if they were really calling out ‘bad guys’ online, I always got the vibe they were those annoying type of progressives who will harass people for not being accepting in the perfect correct way, you know? They'd be outwardly supportive but there's still a level of high expectations and performance that comes with it, and so deep down Fuuta understands there'd be a "hassle," but can't really define why.
I mentioned in another hc post that Fuuta and his sister have a silent supportive relationship. I feel like she's the one person in his life who knows everything and is super accepting -- this is understood even though neither have said anything out loud. (When he was younger, she definitely forced him into skirts, dresses, and accessories "to check something for her beautician work.") She's noticed all the times he's picked a female avatar in games, or cosplayed in ambiguous outfits.
Then, Milgram. Thinking his life will be over soon anyway, he opens up to a few of the prisoners about himself. Their unexpected openness keeps it on his mind more often than before. Still, nothing changes. Through some rocky verdicts, he's declared innocent and released.
Back in the real world, he's pretty fucked up from the whole ordeal, and starts off extremely isolated. He's in touch with his family, but distant. He maintains contact with some of the other released prisoners, but it starts off only over the phone. He changes schools or maybe drops out completely. Having deleted all online accounts after the incident, he gets to work setting up a new online presence. He was planning on using an alias anyways, and goes with something gender neutral. "To be extra safe that no one guesses it's me," he tells himself.
Letting his hair grow out begins as an accident -- just a side effect of never going out or minding his appearance. One day he realizes how long he's let it go and grabs some scissors to cut it. He makes a comment in his chat, and someone begs him to send a picture first. He goes to take it, but is suddenly disgusted and ashamed of his self-neglect. He's forced to make himself selfie presentable first: brushing his hair and throwing on something clean real quick. When he goes to take the picture, he realizes it looks good. It feels good. He puts the scissors away.
Soon, the prisoners/some new online friends coax Fuuta to hang out more. That's when she decides to reintroduce herself into society as someone new. She ventures out with the name of a favorite video game character. (I'm going to continue saying Fuuta because I genuinely can't name a single popular character from games she'd play, but just picture the most painfully obvious one you can. The kind you hear and go "oh okay. You play X too much, huh." And please send me your thoughts so I can work them into my own personal canon 👀)
She doesn't have any hatred towards her deadname, it's more the pain of association: she remembers it said accusingly from the mouths of ex-friends. She remembers that name being called a murderer. She's not trying to deny/run from that past, she just wants to be someone better. Well, some days it is her way of running away, but most of the time it's a healthy separation from the past.
Encouraged by the positive reception and abundance of privacy in her isolation, she finally starts to explore her appearance more. Mikoto left behind some earrings during a visit -- she pierces her ears herself and tries them on. (If she doesn't like them, the holes will just heal, right? She's not weak, she can take a little pain...) Yuno/Mahiru stayed over once, and left a bit of makeup in the bathroom. She tries that on too. With a beautician in the family, this self-styling comes very easily. Fuuta's cowardly tendencies have her torn between embarrassment and her typical 'fuck you' attitude that she can do whatever she wants.
You know when you solve a tiny problem and suddenly you're smacked with how much of a huge problem it actually was? Fuuta never believed she had any issues before, but all of the sudden she's happier. Every day is easier. She has more friends. True friends. She does better with school/work. Her personality is still fiery, but it's more passion than irritability now. Self-hatred she didn't recognize starts melting away. She smiles more. She laughs more. She has plans for her future. She's excited about her future.
(Shameless art plug hehe, before I had the timeline nailed down I did a little drawing of that selfie Fuuta takes when she realizes she's satisfied with this appearance, and now has newfound motivation to move forward in life.)
Over time she experiments with other elements of transitioning, and maybe changes her name to something a bit more subtle lol.
Unfortunately, I don't think it would go over well with her parents, but she never much cared for their opinions, anyway. One day a bit in the future, she bumps into her old friends in the street. Once recovering from panic, she's pleasantly surprised that they don't recognize her. Fuuta thought her appearance/fashion wasn't that different, but to fair, the friends figured they'd remember a stunning redhead with a very noticeable eye injury if they'd met before...
And just a few quick prisoner reactions (because in my heart they're all making it out ;--;):
Yuno has similar relationship as Fuuta's sister, offering immense help without unnecessary words. She's Fuuta’s go-to contact for trying new things and asking questions.
When Mahiru first finds out, she goes a bit overboard with a makeover attempt. She and Muu provide their most frilly, glimmering outfits. They paint her nails and do makeup. They style her hair. This obviously turns out to be way too much, earning them a Fuuta-typical rant. Still, she's secretly moved by their enthusiasm and kindness.
After that, designer Mikoto tries his hand at helping. Fuuta had been really worried the two of them would lose their guys nights out and relaxed friendship, but their relationship never changes.
Shidou is very accepting and very awkward. He's trying!! He gets excited, sending her all this information and help for medically transitioning.
Fuuta invites Kazui to their first pride parade <3
Though there's no return address on the package, Fuuta receives a gift of miscellaneous earrings and piercings in the mail with a note that they'd suit her well…
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New Fic Incoming
In honor of Lesbian Visibility Week and Episode 2 coming soon, I’ve been working on a fic called Jealous Jester that I was inspired to write after seeing all of the lovey art that’s been going around recently of Pomni being a jealous little shit and put up a preview.
It’s also written as a sorta sequel to a previous fic of mine, Pesky Cartoon Logic, which you can read here if you’d like. Not required, but it’d give you an idea of how I personally write the girls.
I’m aiming to upload Chapter 1 on AO3 by the end of tomorrow, but will probably have the whole thing out by Monday at the latest.
Enjoy ❤️
It’s not a big deal.
The jester repeated this inside her head. Despite the loud nonsensical prattle of the group that went on closely behind her, all Pomni could hear aside from the mantra she made to keep her emotions and breathing in check was a distinct ringing. She didn’t want to stare, but her eyes remained locked on the irksome scene she was witnessing, completely fixated on the two women still embracing each other in what she thought was the longest goodbye ever.
Stop being weird. They’re just hugging.
An uncomfortable tightness grew in her chest, and she clenched her jaw in a half-repressed scowl. If it wasn’t for the fact that the gloves she wore were permanently stuck to her hands, the jester was sure her nails would be digging into her palms from how firmly her fists were curling against her sides.
It’s Ragatha. She’s hopelessly friendly to everyone. Including people who weren’t real.
Even with the reminder, her eye starts to twitch as she watches her girlfriend finally separate herself from the taller woman, only to see their hands still clasped together in between them as they continue to chat. Their words were unintelligible due to being too far away for the jester to hear, not that she was in the right headspace to focus enough on what they were saying anyway. Normally, she relished any chance to see the ragdoll smile and would diligently keep mental notes of everything that made Ragatha genuinely happy. Because Pomni valued her girlfriend’s happiness above all else.
She’s kind. This is just Ragatha being her usual, sweet self. It’s why you love her.
But Pomni did not love this. Not at all. She didn’t know what about their conversation was making Ragatha beam so brilliantly, and she didn’t care. The jester threw this particular mental note in the metaphorical fire. Watched it burn and crumble into ash inside her head. Without meaning to, her frustration added the kindling necessary for the heat to grow and boil inside her gut until it rose along her spine like smoke in a chimney. Pomni was glad she was facing away from the others because there was no way the irritated look on her flushed face could be any more obvious.
Pathetic.
Pomni’s eyes finally fell to the ground out of fear that her heated gaze would soon start burning a hole if she let it linger any longer on the hands linking with Ragatha’s. Hands that she petulantly wished were her own and not the woman who was currently stealing all of her attention.
Getting this jealous over some stupid NPC? This has got to be a new low.
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Angstpril 2023 Day One: Liar
There were very few things in life that Eadwulf insisted upon without any chance of compromise. Choosing battles was a matter of survival under the tutelage of Master Ikithon; incurring punishment was easy enough to do even without the added risk that stubbornness presented. To resist bending only made it inevitable that one would eventually have to break, and as far as Eadwulf was concerned, the world offered little of great enough importance to justify tempting that fate.
It was not an oath made lightly, then, when he promised that he would return every day that he was able to one particular cell in the depths of Vergesson Sanatorium.
Astrid refused to speak to him for weeks after the incident, after what he did that night to save her from a fate far worse than a scar. So, with no one there to swear it to, he made his promise to the gods themselves.
He knelt on the floor of his bedroom, hands clasped together in his lap. Outside the small window above his bed, the cool light of the nearly-full moon fanned out across the skies, setting the shadowed room aglow with the night’s ghostly haze. His gaze settled on the nearest mountain peaks; ancient and immense and unmoving, he thought they must be the closest things to gods he would ever lay his eyes on. When thoughts of his past, of his people, of his own actions that night threatened to creep to the front of his mind, he pressed them back into the darkness of memory. They were gone now; there was nothing more to be done for them. Instead, he turned his thoughts again to Bren, to bright red hair and wild eyes and roaring flames and the crack of rock against bone.
“If I condemned him to this fate,” he whispered, so quiet it was more thought than speech, “let me be the one to see him through it.”
Only a moment later, the soft moonlight was eclipsed by the silhouettes of two ravens coming to rest on the windowsill, and he knew somewhere deep within him that his oath had been sealed.
The next morning, he rose earlier than usual and ate his breakfast as quickly as he could manage to hold it down. The sun still hadn’t even begun to show itself in the young day’s sky when he slipped past the guards at the sanatorium, giving each of them a look which told them not to stand in his way if they valued their lives. They had no way of knowing that, in truth, he wasn’t sure if he would have the courage to make good on that threat; they only saw the determination in his eyes and stepped aside.
As he pushed through hall after hall, he wasted no time looking at anything other than the faces in each cell, searching for blue eyes and red hair. Any strange looks that may have been aimed his way were lost in the blur of stone and bars and wrong faces.
When he finally turned a corner and saw a short-cropped burst of orange in the nearest cell, he was just in time to stop the guard who was preparing to enter with whatever sad excuse for a breakfast they had prepared for the day. He caught the guard by the arm, stooping down to look her in the eye, and pressed a few coins into her hand.
All he said was, “Let me.”
She stared at him for a long few seconds, head tilted to one side, before shrugging.
“If you insist.”
Handing him the tray of oatmeal and water, she unlocked the door of Bren’s cell and started off toward the next one down, leaving Eadwulf there alone. He slipped through the door, closed it behind him, and crouched down next to Bren, truly taking in his current state for the first time.
Perhaps the most noticeable thing should have been how beat up he was – the dark bruises, the blood that no one had bothered to wash from his skin. But instead, all Eadwulf could see was how empty he looked. There was always such a fire behind his eyes, a kind of passion and life there, like his mind was working so feverishly to puzzle the world together that you could watch it happening from the outside, and now? That fire had been all but doused. His eyes were glazed over, wandering helplessly around the space, looking through it all and not truly seeing any of it. There was a slight strain on his face, a clench to his brow that Eadwulf knew his resting face didn’t possess, which betrayed some process of thought, no doubt an unpleasant one. It was distant, though, and passive, as though the thoughts had taken on a life of their own within his mind and he, in this clouded state, was helpless to resist or engage them at all. When his gaze finally fell on Eadwulf, there was a soft spark of recognition that sent Eadwulf’s heart into his throat.
Eadwulf returned every morning after that, and again every night, so long as he wasn’t off on a mission or locked away for the sake of some punishment. Each morning, he fed Bren whatever breakfast the guards had prepared, careful to make it a far more gentle process than the other meals likely involved. As Bren’s hair grew longer with time, Eadwulf took to brushing it, and trimming it when the ends began to fray. A few times, he considered cutting it short again; surely, it would be more comfortable for Bren to have less of it. But there was no ignoring how his eyes fluttered closed at the feeling of it being brushed, or how he hummed in a way that almost seemed to approach contentment — better to keep it long, Eadwulf always ultimately decided.
At night, Eadwulf would clean him — easy enough to do with a simple spell, but most nights Eadwulf wiped his face and hands the mundane way first, probably more for his own sake than for Bren’s — and tended to whatever wounds may have been sustained since the last visit. Then, he would take out whatever books he had been able to find that day, sit by Bren��s side, and read. Bren’s favorite of the books, judging by the way his eyes brightened ever so slightly at the sight of its cover, was an old children's story about a young boy and a cat prince, so they always started and finished with that one. In between, they cycled through as many of the other books as Eadwulf thought they safely had time for, and by the time he closed the fairytale for the final time, Bren was almost always slumped against his side, asleep.
Eventually, once the rifts between them had been repaired, Astrid joined him for some of his visits, though she was quickly given more responsibilities than him and often found it more difficult to get away. On those days, Astrid would braid Bren’s hair once he had brushed it in the mornings, and alternated reading with him at night.
And after every nighttime visit, he would sit in his bed and write a few lines in a journal: how the day’s visits had gone, what had gone on in the outside world that day or over the past few days, what he and Astrid were doing in their own lives. Someday, he told himself, Bren would have his mind back. Someday, he would hand over the journal, a meticulous record of the days Bren was locked away. Someday, Bren would be able to read it, and it would be as if he hadn’t missed a thing at all.
In all that time spent in Bren’s cell, Eadwulf never feared being discovered by Master Ikithon — not out of carelessness or apathy toward the consequences he would inevitably incur, but because he knew it was foolish to assume he hadn’t already been discovered at the very start. The archmage’s gaze took immense care to avoid, and nowhere was it more omnipresent than in the halls of the sanatorium. The chances that he had gone unnoticed were laughably slim — it was better to assume Master Ikithon was well aware, that a confrontation would come soon enough.
And come it did.
One morning, nearly two years into his visits, Eadwulf arrived at Bren’s cell to see his teacher standing there, calmly watching him approach. Inside the cell, he could see Bren’s eyes wide and his face held more tensely than usual. He was shifting slightly where he sat, as though his own body were the walls of a prison preventing him from running away.
All at once, Eadwulf was overcome with the urge to run forward, to lunge at Ikithon, to scream, because how dare he come here and strike that kind of fear into someone so helpless, hasn’t Bren been through enough? But he pushed the urge down and kept calm as he walked in spite of it. It was him that the archmage was angry with, it was him who would face the consequences of his actions; Bren had no reason to be afraid.
As it turned out, neither did he. Master Ikithon wasn’t angry, not at Eadwulf nor Bren; he never said or even suggested that Eadwulf would be punished, and the calm smile never fell from his face. He seemed entirely unfazed — pleased, even — by Eadwulf’s actions.
“You are welcome to visit our dear Bren whenever you wish, Eadwulf,” he said in a tone that could almost be mistaken for good-natured, “as is Miss Becke. In fact, I think it’s wonderful that you three have grown to care so much for each other, even after all this time. By all means, do continue to come visit him if it pleases you.” Moving closer, he added in a lower tone, “I would only urge you to remember that it is for you, yes? As much as it pains me to say this, Bren is — how shall I put this? — absent, by all accounts. You are a smart boy, I have no doubt you’ve noticed. Each time you leave this place, it is to him as if you were never here at all; he won’t remember. The sharp young man we knew is, I’m afraid, no longer with us.”
And every night since then, as silence fell over the sanatorium’s halls, Eadwulf would look down at Bren, tucked against his side the same way they had once grown used to laying in their beds, and ask himself: how could that possibly be true?
How, when he still squirmed at the mere sight of his old teacher standing nearby, when his eyes still sparked at the sight of his favorite fairytale’s cover, when he still remembered how to fall asleep next to Eadwulf like it was as simple as breathing, could Bren be gone? How could it be possible that such a sharp mind, so full of passion and of life, simply slipped away? Even if he remembered none of it, even if each day felt to him like the first time, Bren seemed in his own way to welcome their company far more than any other’s, to relax in some small way at their presence; did that not count for something?
It would take him many more years to truly make sense of it, to fully understand the weight of what it meant, but the simple fact remained: that Bren was gone was the first of Trent Ikithon’s lies that Eadwulf ever saw through.
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