#buy one get a sample kind of deal

[sing-me-under]

It’s that time again! It’s c!Sapnap (and c!Karlnapity) during Manberg era brain rot again!

(All names are referencing the characters, regardless of if I add c! or not. No cc! are mentioned in this post).

c!Sapnap was directly loyal to c!Dream, but he wasn’t employed by the Greater Kingdom like the Knights of Eret. Whenever Dream went to meet with Schlatt for politics stuff, Sapnap would go along as Dream’s personal guard. (Even though Sapnap was aware of Dream’s visits to Pogtopia, he stayed in Manberg to spend time with his fiancé, Karl.)

c!Sapnap thought c!Quackity was an asshole at first. Sapnap really only knew about Quackity through George, and he wasn’t particularly impressed by George’s descriptions. Sapnap’s impression only got worse when Wilbur and Tommy were exiled. Sapnap rarely ever interacted with the Manberg cabinet anyway because Schlatt would kick everyone out of the room when Dream visited. Sapnap would wait by the door, but the rest of them would scatter to catch up on work.

Sapnap wasn’t fond of c!Karl decision to move to Manberg. Karl originally moved to Manberg for work and “to experience new horizons”. c!Sapnap chose to stay in the Greater Kingdom, partly for work and partly because he just didn’t like Manberg. This postponed their wedding date from “sometime in autumn” to “indefinite”.

Sapnap and Karl used to have “drinks nights” where they would sit at home and cozy up with some new hot drink Karl was trying. Usually it was a new tea blend, typically iced tea during the summer. On colder days, it was coffee or a special recipe for hot chocolate. When Karl moved to Manberg, Sapnap was only able to visit during daylight hours, crammed within his busy schedule (courtesy of Dream), so they didn’t have date nights as often anymore.

Karl was the first new citizen of Manberg., and c!Quackity was the one to directly host Karl’s citizenship test. They immediately hit it off. c!Karl was just a random citizen of Manberg that c!Quackity would find solace in during the worst times in the Manberg cabinet. Once a week, Quackity would spend his lunch break (which he usually doesn’t even bother to take the rest of the week) at Karl’s to try out some new tea blend or drink recipe. They were always tooth achingly sweet.

Sapnap was wary of Quackity, but he was absolutely enamored by Karl’s rambling prose about the Vice President. Sapnap could tell that Karl was falling in love with Schlatt’s husband, and Sapnap honestly couldn’t say that was a bad thing. He saw how Schlatt mistreated his cabinet when Schlatt had guests, and he could only assume the worst when there weren’t prying eyes.

When Dream suddenly switched sides after some mystery deal with Schlatt, Sapnap was very vocally against it. He still fought by c!Dream’s side though and was granted full command of Manberg’s soldiers. Sapnap wasn’t very keen on giving them a fighting chance, not when he was quietly rooting for Pogtopia. (He had been craving bloodshed though, so he still put in the effort.)

After c!Quackity shot c!Schlatt and ran away to Pogtopia, Karl decided to join Schlatt’s cabinet when everyone else abandoned ship. He constantly undermined Schlatt’s orders, purposely fucked with the paperwork, and actively sabotaged everything. Sapnap was leading the crumbling Manberg military, so no one dared to call Karl out. Karl was very proud of that.

Sapnap and Karl had an open relationship throughout their entire time together. Sapnap had been in QPR with Dream and George since forever, but Karl was actively polyamorous. They had never had a third together though.

Apparently, Quackity never knew Karl was engaged to Sapnap despite their long term engagement being a hot topic among the mass populous of the Greater Kingdom. Karl had taken that little tidbit for granted, not realizing that Quackity had never lived in the Greater Kingdom and therefore was not exposed to its rumors and gossip articles.

c!Sapnap was very understanding of Quackity’s upset at the revelation. Although he didn’t have the best first impression of Quackity, he was aware Quackity made Karl happy. Much like that first day with Karl, Quackity and Sapnap immediately got along (sometimes at Karl’s expense), so Karl offered up a relationship between all three of them.

It just felt right with the three of them, so they decided to close their relationship. (Then George got pulled in as a queerplatonic fourth after Dream abandoned him and Sapnap).

#personal #dsmp #Karlnapity #Karlnap #quacknap #honq #look I love the Sapnap has a crush on Quackity during Manberg headcanons #but also they almost never interacted #c​Quackity was very upset by cSapnap’s very existence #it was very much a #buy one get a sample kind of deal #and Quackity eventually decided to get the full package #kind of thing #HonQ was an illicit affair #but QuackNap was an arranged engagement that became genuine #is arranged engagement the right way to describe it? #or shotgun engagement #You know like the same thing as #if we’re single by 40 let’s get married #kind of deal #amiable acquaintances who only get to know each other after being engaged #anyway they didn’t know each other much but they were like Let’s Try It Anyway #and it turned out great! #they love each other! #and they still love each other! #IT HURTS

[cheapshrimpysheep]

Spring of Canathus (AKA: They're Babies)

SUMMARY: They drank water that ended up turning them into babies. You were in charge of taking care of them while the rest of the students go looking for the antidote. What will they be like as babies?

CHARACTERS: Overblot Students (Riddle, Leona, Azul, Jamil, Vil, Idia & Malleus)

TAGS: Bullet Points, GN Reader, Fluff, Cute

WORD COUNT: An average of 350 words per character. More or less. This is distributed in a different way than I usually do.

COMMENTS: Yes, a post about what it would be like if they were babies. But I have a good excuse for this: It is canon in the Hercules TV show and I even remember watching this episode when I was younger. Episode 50 of the first season: Hercules and the Spring of Canathus. The Spring of Canathus is a pool which reverses age. Pain and Panic use it on Hercules and other character in the episode, turning them into babies.

I hope you enjoy 🧸🍼

CONTEXT: Seven bottles of a supposedly new water were delivered to NRC Housewardens. A small sample. But when they drink it they turn into babies. Sam doesn't have the antidote, but he have the information of where the spring is that they need to get the babies back to normal. The other students you know from the dorm went to get the water and you were in charge of taking care of the babies. Grim went to look for the spring with the others because he didn't want to deal with babies.

You take care of them in Ramshackle Dorm.

Riddle drank the water because it would be bad manners to refuse it. Or because of some strange rule from the Queen of Hearts.

Tantrums, a lot of tantrums.

He is an "independent" baby. You will probably lose sight of him sometimes because he started walking/crawling around to explore the house.

He always wants to eat sweets. You'll find him from time to time sneaking into the kitchen looking for cookies or something like that.

He bites anyone who irritates him. Maybe even you. But in your case, if you pretend that he hurt you a lot, he will start crying with regret and hug you.

If he gets mad at someone and you show up, he'll point to the person who annoyed him as if he's complain to you. Kind of like the "I'm gonna tell mom" thing.

When you hold him up and give him affection, he will respond with a lot of affection too and laugh a lot. But after that he will always want to be with you and be jealous of the other babies.

When you scold him and tell him not to do something again he will start crying and hug you as an apology, but he will never disobey you.

Leona drank the water, because why not?

Half the time he is sleeping which makes him peaceful. But the other half when he's awake, he's a little terror.

Like a baby lion, he wants to play, which means play fighting with other babies, so you are always separating him from the others.

He will bite and scratch you, without leaving very deep marks, because he wants to play. And you decide that it's preferable for him to bite and scratch you than the other babies.

He won't leave your side because he is lazy and you are the one who entertains him the most and gives him food. And he will always want to sleep either on your lap or on your chest.

He'll complain with those baby lion roars that sound more like grumpy meows.

If you hug him or give him too much affection, he will push you away with his little hands. But if you're not too clingy he'll headbutt your cheeks lovingly.

When he's calmer, he'll lick any small wounds he may have inflicted on you while he was playing.

If you buy toys for him, buy toys for him to bite.

There is a high chance of him attacking your cushions, sofas, curtains, etc. He will probably break things like a cat throwing a glass off the table on the floor.

When you seriously scold him that's the only time he'll cry.

Azul drank the water because he thought that if it was good he could make a deal to sell it at Mostro Lounge.

Cry baby!

He will be crying constantly at first. Until you realize he wants to go into the water.

You fill a bathtub, take his clothes off and put him in it. He turns into a little octopus merbaby.

But he is still not satisfied. After analysing the water for a second he started crying again. You then assume that he wants sea water, so you go get a bunch of salt from the kitchen and pour it all in there. Now he laughs happily.

You go to Sam's to buy some toys for Azul to play in the bathtub.

Problem: He will cry whenever you are not with him.

When you are with him in the bathroom and with one arm in the bathtub, if you get ready to get up, he will grab your arm with his little tentacles so you don't leave.

Maybe you buy Sam an aquarium to put Azul in so he can be in the room with you and the other babies.

He will cry whenever he sees you cuddling another baby. He also wants your affection!

He absolutely loves it when you pick him up.

You will end up with a lot of suction cup marks on your arms.

He's the type of baby that puts everything in his mouth and you have to be careful.

Jamil was the one who drank the water because whenever Kalim receives food he has to make sure it isn't poisoned.

He is one of the least problematic babies. He's a very quiet baby, which worries you a little.

He doesn't throw tantrums, but he doesn't seem to laugh much either. He also seems undecided whether he stays near you or not.

At first this ends up making you forget about him a little while dealing with the others. But when you realize it, you'll immediately pay attention to him.

When you pick him up for the first time, he doesn't know how to react. But as soon as you start giving him affection, he will laugh and return the affection. The others will be jealous because you're paying so much attention to him.

He can't sleep unless you rock him. Do you know about that thing that babies feel safer when they are close to their mother's heart? He only feels rested enough if he is lying on your chest and listening to your heart beating.

Since he's the one who laughs the least, you might end up paying more attention to him to make him happy, which will make others jealous, but him very happy.

Vil drank the water because he thought it was the product of an advertisement that he and his manager talked about once.

He's a grumpy baby.

He's the type to throw things when he's upset.

His tantrums may be quieter than Riddle's, but they are just as intense.

He likes to do little things like stack cubes or doodle on paper and show it to you with pride. The more you congratulate him on these little things, the more things he will do just to show them to you.

Maybe you'll end the day with a sketchbook of his drawings. (Rook will be so jealous of you)

When you pick him up and give him affection, it's the moment when he smiles and laughs more. And of course he will return the affection.

He's also the type of baby who likes to walk or crawl around, so you might lose sight of him if you're distracted.

He is fascinated by beautiful things so every now and then you can see him staring at some cute object.

If you put a video on your cell phone, or PC if you have one, he will be hypnotized watching it. And if it's something, or someone he really likes, he'll clap and get your attention so you can look at it too. If he sees Neige, he'll throw a tantrum.

Idia drank the water a little with the same thought as Leona: Why not? Somehow, Ortho found no abnormalities when it scanned the bottle.

Cry baby #2

He will never ever EVER leave your side. He's the type to hold on to your leg and never let go.

He will hide behind you, or your legs.

He will cry for you to hold him. Especially if he feels threatened by Leona or Riddle for example.

Even when you hold him to your chest, you'll feel his little hands gripping your shirt, as if he's afraid to let go.

He will also cry whenever he doesn't see you around.

He loves stuffed animals and other plushies.

He will hide a lot, which can make you lose sight of him. But as soon as he sees you looking for him, he goes straight to you for you to pick him up.

He loves learning toys, but can get tired of them quickly.

He can only sleep if you are close to him.

Of all the babies, he is the one who most reciprocates the affection you give him. He is a very enthusiastic little boy.

He also likes to draw and in the middle of the doodles you will be able to see a drawing of him, eighteen years old, with you and hearts around.

Malleus thought it was some kind of gift. The biggest surprise was that it was strong enough to affect even Malleus Draconia.

Unlike the others, only Silver and Sebek went looking for the antidote. Lilia stayed to take care of Malleus, so they stayed in Diasomnia.

Until you receive a call from Lilia because Malleus really wants to see you. AKA: he won't stop crying and throwing tantrums because he wants to be with you and the lightning strikes are getting worse and worse.

Given the circumstances of you also taking care of the other babies, you decide that it is best for Lilia and Malleus to go to Ramshackle Dorm.

When you open the door and baby Malleus sees you his curious face turns into a huge smile and he stretches his arms out to you. Lilia looks slightly apprehensive, but hands you the baby to hold. He was worried that Malleus could hurt you with his strength.

But that doesn't happen. The first moment you show discomfort, he will stop hugging you and look worried and afraid that he has hurt you. You’ll need to reassure him so he doesn't start crying.

Lillia and he stay in a separate room to avoid the risk of Malleus losing control of his powers. But, almost every 5 minutes, Lilia will call you because Malleus misses you.

He loves your cuddles and give him affection! He's the happiest baby when you're with him.

Whenever you kiss his cheeks he will laugh very loudly and happily. And he will kiss your cheeks back.

When you take too long to show up, you'll start to hear lightning outside and a storm brewing.

He will inevitably burn you by accident. With a simple sneeze. And the burns won't be worse because Lilia will protect you.

Whenever he realizes he hurt you, he will start crying and a torrential rain will start outside. You will have to reassure him, saying that everything is fine and that you will not leave him because of that.

He is very curious. Anything you do he will look closely at you.

You and Lilia will end up taking turns. while one of you is with Malleus, the other was with the rest of the babies.

Whenever you return to the other babies after Lilia's shift, they will attack you with hugs as if they miss you terribly.

YOU WILL COOK! Baby Malleus, keep Lilia busy!

Leona will want to play fight with everyone, so you will always be keeping him away from others. He will annoy Riddle and Vil and make Azul and Idia cry. Jamil is the only one who might retaliate in kind, which is not a good thing. Idia will cling to you so you can protect him from Leona.

Riddle gets along well with everyone else, but can get irritated with Vil and vice versa. They both like things to be done their way and can throw tantrums to have a toy or do something a certain way.

Azul can be clingy. And the ones most likely for him to be very attached to and want to be close to them are Jamil and Idia. These three are the least aggressive so the three of them would get along very well.

Jamil prefers to be close to Idia because he is calm and not very clingy.

If you feel sorry for Malleus for not being able to be with the other babies, you ask Lilia if any of them could be with Malleus for a little while.

You both agree that the best candidate for this would be Idia. He is calm and Lilia knows that he and Malleus get along very well. Plus, Idia is the least likely to get scared if he sees a bit of green fire.

At first Idia will be a little afraid, but then he will recognize Malleus. Idia will show toys and how to play with them while Malleus looks on attentively.

They only returned to normal when they were in their respective dorms, so they hadn't seen you since they were still babies.

Riddle will come to Ramshackle Dorm with your favourite cake or pie made by Trey.

He tries to hide his embarrassment the whole time.

He wanted to thank you for what you did, apologize for any inconvenience and ask you to please not tell anyone any details of what happened.

If you tell him how cute he was, he'll blush a lot and ask you to stop saying those things.

Leona will enter Ramshackle Dorm without knocking or anything. He'll just open the door, walk in, close the door behind him and walk right up to you.

“Listen up, herbivore! No talking about what happened! Understood?”

If you comment about him being as grumpy now as he was as a baby he'll reply with "I told you: no talking about it!"

If he sees the scratch marks on your arms, his tone will drop a little. And you'll see his ears lowered back. “Those were mine, weren't they?” and he will look a little embarrassed.

He will curse under his breath and calm down completely. Sit next to you on the couch and take one of your arms "Sorry" and give light kisses to the scratches.

Someone knocks on the door of Ramshackle Dorm and when you open it you see Azul carrying a large gift and a wide charismatic smile on his face.

The gift was something big and expensive that he knew you really wanted.

Asking him what he wanted in return for that: “Your silence. I want you to never tell anyone, much less the twins, what happened, especially the parts that concern me.”

You can tell him that he could also pay for the toys, aquarium, salt and the rest of the things you paid for him. If he complains and asks why you bought all that, you tell him he wouldn't stop crying and he will immediately agree to pay you back for all that stuff.

If he sees the cupping marks on your arms he will blush with embarrassment. “I-I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?”

You say he didn't hurt you, but the tentacles were pretty strong. He will take your hands and lightly kiss the marks.

Jamil shows up at Ramshackle Dorm with your favourite dish, freshly made by him, in a Tupperware container.

He greets you, asks how you are and then asks if he can come in. It's only after you're both in the common room that you ask if that's for him to ask you not to tell anyone about what happened.

And he will answer yes, embarrassed. And above all, you can't tell Kalim, or Azul, anything. (they don't remember what happened)

If you say there weren't many things to tell even if you wanted to and that was what worried you, he won't even know how to respond to that.

And if you start telling him how you spent time with him and played with him just to make him smile, he'll be so flattered he'll pull his hood over his face. And you'll only make it worse if you say his laugh was so cute.

He will apologize to you and say that even though he doesn't remember exactly what happened, he remembers feeling really happy whenever he was with you.

Vil trusts you enough to know that you wouldn't tell anyone anything that could harm him or his career, so he just went to the Ramshackle Dorm to thank you.

In addition to a few kisses on your cheek, he also offers you something from his cosmetics line.

If you mention the drawings he made for you, he'll brag about being an artist since he was little.

But if you start talking about the tantrums, he'll be embarrassed, and he will defend himself between laughs that, apparently, he has always been a demanding person.

Idia doesn't want to see you face to face because he is extremely embarrassed. But he also needs to make sure that you don't tell anyone what happened.

His tablet shows up at Ramshackle Dorm door.

So, you know that cell phone game you love? What if he buys you those 1230 Gems? You wouldn't say anything too detailed about what happened to anyone, right?

If you start talking about how cute he was, he'll beg you to stop. You can't see him on the tablet, but the more you talk about it, the pinker his hair gets.

He'll bounce as soon as he is sure that you've made a deal and you'll not tell anyone about what happened.

Lilia told Malleus about having to take him to you because he was throwing a tantrum about not being close to you. He even mentioned (dramatically) that he was hurt that he was no longer enough to take care of Malleus.

And because of this, when Malleus appeared at the door of Ramshackle Dorm to thank you, he was also partially embarrassed.

He thanks you for being so brave to agree to help Lilia take care of him. And he asks if he caused many problems, and that, in advance, he's sorry for all of them.

You can try to say he didn't cause any major problems, but somehow he'll be able to see the little burn marks on your arms. The kind of burns he knows only his flames can cause.

He will politely interrupt you and ask you to show him your arms.

The burns aren't many, nor are they very serious, but either way he widens his eyes in worry and regret. “You lied to me. After all, I caused a serious problem. I hurt you.” He also seems a little sulky that you tried to hide it from him.

He asks if he can touch your arms. After you give him permission, he kneels in front of you, gently grabs your arms and kisses the burns, all of them.

If you would like to read more from me, you can find it in my pinned post: INDEX

#Twisted Wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #disney twisted wonderland #twst imagines #twst wonderland #twst fluff #Twisted Wonderland Fluff #Riddle Rosehearts #Riddle Rosehearts x Reader #Riddle x Reader #Leona Kingscholar #Leona Kingscholar x Reader #Leona x Reader #Azul Ashengrotto #Azul Ashengrotto x Reader #Azul x Reader #Jamil Viper #Jamil Viper x Reader #Jamil x Reader #Vil Schoenheit #Vil Schoenheit x Reader #Vil x Reader #Idia Shroud #Idia Shroud x Reader #Idia x Reader #Malleus Draconia #Malleus Draconia x Reader #Malleus x Reader

[glow-worms-are-believers]

Fresh Lemonade: 50¢ (dp x dc)

Jason was seconds away from collapsing. He had been awake for a bit less than three days straight due to a particularly difficult case and he could now barely keep his eyes open. He was wearing civilian clothes as he dragged his body through the streets of Crime Alley, way too tired to attempt getting to his safe-house via rooftops. His barely-coherent thoughts all focused on how heavenly his bed was going to feel for the half second he’d be in it before he could finally fall unconscious. He turned to arrive on his street only to stop at the sight of a small and cutely decorated lemonade stand. Jason squinted, half-believing his mind was playing tricks on him because this was Crime Alley. One of the worst part of it in fact.

People who lived there were either hardened criminals or desperate and stuck. It was not the the kind of place that would encourage the existence of a lemonade stand. As Jason got closer to it, he could soon see a slip of a girl sitting on a little stool behind the counter. The vigilante stopped in front of the sign announcing the cost for one glass being 50 cents and looked at the girl curiously. As if sensing his gaze, she raised her head from the game she had been playing and gave him a beaming smile.

“Hi,” she chirped. “Would you like to buy some lemonade?”

“How long have you been here?” Jason asked, worried about her lack of fear of a stranger.

“You mean the stand?” She said before continuing smugly, “I just set it up. It’s pretty sweet right?”

“Kid,” the vigilante started, “this is Crime Alley, not Bristol. You need to stop or move your operation.”

“No way!” she protested. “It took me ages to get everything right, I’m not tearing it down now.”

“Where are your parents?” Jason asked as he resisted the urge to sigh.

The girl frowned as her eyes narrowed. “Either get a glass, or move along mister.”

Jason sighed before he walked a bit further as he got his phone out of his pocket. He was too tired to deal with this. One of his underling could do the fine job of keeping the kid from getting beat up.

As the dial tone sounded, Jason heard a voice coming from behind.

“Fresh lemonade, huh? Why don’t you give me a sample,” said a male voice.

“Sorry,” came the girl’s voice. “I don’t have cups for that. You have to buy one.”

“I don’t like the sound of that,” came the mocking voice of the customer and Jason sighed at the imminent confrontation. Maybe it would teach the girl some caution if nothing else. “Why don’t I just-”

The scream of pain had the vigilante snapping the phone shut and turning around in an instant, only to see an older teenager cradling his visibly-broken hand close to his chest as the girl tutted at him.

“No swiping,” she lectured. “If you want some you gotta pay for it fair and square.” The teenager looked at her hesitatingly with a tinge of fear in his eyes before he scampered off with a few curses.

Well.

Maybe sleep could wait a little while more.

With a smile, Jason walked back to the stand. “You know what, I changed my mind, get me a cup.”

#dc x dp #dp x dc #dani fenton #Look at this feral child learning how to act like a normal human #Isn’t she adorable #roxpox #roxpoxwrote

[mushroomates]

the fellowship at a hardware store, from someone who works at a hardware store:

sam: is in the nursery!! goes straight to the discount/dying plants and piles his cart full of wilted and sad plants. likes to rescue the houseplants first, has a soft spot for perennials and citrus trees. is a nightmare to check out but is very sweet about it. dirt and leaves everywhere. like, everywhere. they have to sweep after he’s gone. surprisingly strong and hauls big bags of dirt.

frodo: enjoys home improvement!! likes to wander carpeting and organization, hunts for good deals and keeps tabs on the sales weekends. he likes to peruse the shower curtains and closet accessories. likes to refurbish old furniture he finds off the side of the road- currently fixing up an antique dresser to put in the master bedroom.

merry: doorknobs, handles, dresser nobs. he likes to pick out the interesting and antique ones and customize his home with them. he really likes the oddly shaped ones, he has one starfish and one pickle on his nightstand table. likes to joke about touching all the knobs and fiddling with the knockers.

pippin: is lost in the lighting department. he’s staring up at all the pretty lights and hypnotizing fans. likes the remote controlled lights, enjoys messing with the demos. also likes collecting paint chips. (pippins also the kind of person to get really high and shit in the display toilets.) does not buy anything, maybe some beef jerky and skittles at the check outs.

boromir: this man has like 80 projects going on and is remarkably proficient in every conceivable area featured in the store. he’s here so much people think he works here. he kinda does. he’s happy to advise you, lead you to products, and lifts heavy things for little old ladies and swooning maidens. he’s happy to grab the things on the highest shelf as well as carry those bigs bags of dirt out to your care. he is just a naturally pure and helpful soul. <3

aragorn: has lost himself in scrap wood. straight to the lumber yard, straight to the pile of damaged and recycled wood. once a month, he comes and loads up as much as it will fit in a pickup truck. no one knows what he does with it but he keeps coming back. there are several theories around the store. either he’s building a bunker, has a side hustle by reselling it, makes massive fires or he does wood work. alternatively, he’s a homeless man building his own cabin in the woods so he can live away from society. that’s one’s probably the closest.

gandalf: mixes his own paint. he doesn’t work there but somehow he keeps getting back there and making his own custom colors. was known to pull a miracle and turn gray paint back into white. no one knows how he did this. likes to camp out in the seasonal section. enjoys lounging on couches and swings for long periods of time.

gimli: is so excited to walk into the tools section. wants all the toys. likes power tools in a way that’s both funny and scary. really likes chainsaws and leaf blowers, possibly because they pose the biggest threat to legolas. often gets flagged out the door because no one person needs that many tools and he must be up to something. he always beeps out the door because inevitably someone forgot to take off one of the sensors of his many, many tools. he used to be nicer about this but lately has lost patience with always being stopped out the door, and often will make a show of waving his receipt before leaving.

legolas: spends a good amount of time in the garden. i imagine he gets enamored with the fountains and ponds rather quickly, also likes the statues and fun pots. also, wanders through the garden and samples the plants. by samples i mean eat small bites of it, and if he finds the quality satisfactory he will purchase it. this is rarely the case and he often just goes around eating small bites of houseplants.

#lord of the rings #jrr tolkien #legolas #lotr #gandalf #pippin #samwise gamgee #elves #lotr headcanons #legolas greenleaf #pippin took #merry brandybuck #merry and pippin #gimli #gimli son of gloin #boromir #boromir son of denethor #aragorn #aragorn son of arathorn #frodo baggins #ganfalf #jrrt #middle earth #the fellowship #the hobbit #the fellowship of the ring #gandalf the grey #gandalf the white #hardware #hardware store

[earthry]

Working Papas (Mall AU Headcanons)

AU where the emeritus brothers are not papas. Instead, they work in a mall in separate stores. Secondo was originally gonna be a mall cop but I thought it’d be funnier if he worked at a Claire’s.

Primo works at a Bath & Bodywork’s.

He’s a pro at being able to tell what kinds of products you’d like or need just by vibes only.

Can immediately distinguish scents from each other, can tell what a scent is just with one whiff.

He demonstrates a lotion for you, and when your hands touch it’s like it’s meant to be. His hand feels so right in yours.

You swing by often after that, and he always seems to have a new sample for you to try each time— a gift, he says.

When no one is looking he’ll oh so gently hold your hand and press a soft kiss to the back of it.

Secondo works at a Claire’s.

He’s the manager and he hates it.

God to honest tried to get himself fired but only ended up being promoted— Terzo makes fun of him for it all the time and it drives him nuts.

He has a soft spot for children, but unfortunately the mothers that shop there are horrendous.

Spends all his breaks smoking in the back and taking shots from a water bottle of straight vodka.

Okay, maybe the job isn’t so bad— because he meets you. You just like to look at the cute hair accessories and earrings, you didn’t expect for a huge scary Italian man to ask you if you needed assistance.

He actually recommends a few items and you beam when he shows you one that you absolutely adore.

Fuck, you’re adorable when you smile. Yeah, okay. Maybe the job isn’t too bad.

Terzo works at a Sephora or Ulta.

Everyone’s favorite makeup artist; can sell almost any product with enough sweet talk and flirting.

He’s a popular amongst customers and there’s almost always a line for his consultation.

There’s always at least one co-worker who has a crush on him— and you are no exception.

You intrigue him with your wit and humor and how much you tease him back.

The two of you end up making out in front of the Claire’s during break much to Secondo’s disgust.

Yes, you get lots of good deals on makeup and products from him.

Copia works at one of those weeby anime/k-pop stores.

One of those people who have only seen or heard of Naruto and One Piece. If you ask him what k-pop band he likes, he’s only heard of BTS.

Get’s super addicted to pocky after the first time he tries it— it’s very accessible to him because it’s always in stock. He buys a pack or two before going home after each shift. His brothers joke that it’s like a bad smoking habit.

You can always find him re-arranging the stuffed animals, he likes to rotate them so they get turns to sit together and chat. He tells you this when you ask one day and you find it adorable and charming. He looks a little embarrassed but you tell him it’s cute and he gets flustered.

You think it would be funny so you when you confess to Copia, you tell him you have the doki-dokis and he just looks at you all confused and makes Copia Noises as he tries to decipher your meaning. In the end you sigh out: “it means I like you, you idiot.”

He kisses you and Sakura Kiss from Ouran High School Host Club starts playing and you make eye contact with one of his co-workers who ‘eeps’ and ducks behind the counter. “KISS KISS FALL IN LOVE” begins to blast.

#the band ghost #copia #terzo #secondo #ghost band #ghost bc #papa emeritus iv #cardinal copia #primo #papa emeritus i #papa emeritus iii #papa emeritus ii #headcanons #papa emeritus x reader #papa emeritus i x reader #papa emeritus ii x reader #papa emeritus iii x reader #papa emeritus iv x reader #cardinal copia x reader #Listen. I don’t even know.

[rainderthesomeone]

Meet the Blu team.

this is a list of the headcannons I have for Blu team.

the main head cannon is that there all biological clones of RED team thanks to red Medic taking samples of all there blood and discarding the genetic improperly.

Blu team personality’s

Blue scout is aware that he’s a clone. Makes fun of Red team for having debt due to the phd’s and for dealing with their taxes.

Blue Demo Man is a multitasker that can only multitask. Doesn’t like doing one thing at a time. Does most of the errands. Likes fast food and thinks homemade meals take too long.

Blue Sniper is as mentally unstable as Red sniper, but Red sniper knows how to keep his cool to a degree, Blu sniper dose not, he tends to lash out on the nearest object or person when angered, hates red sniper with a burning passion and throws hissy fits from time to time, tries to prove hes better in everyway compared to red sniper, go's out of his way to hunt red sniper during battle.

Blue Spy is miserable because he has over 50 allergies to think about and he struggles with enjoying things because almost everything reminds him of them. Because of this he dedicates his life to making others as miserable as he is.

Blue engineer has average smarts, meaning that he struggles to do his complicated tasks on the job. So he barely tries, making most people think he’s a lovable but empty-headed idiot who lucks out on the job.

Blue Pyro can speak and its not a pleasent voice, has a channel on Man-Tube (which is mann cos tv channel where they advertise stuff somehow blu pyro got a hold of his own station on there) where he talks about different kinds of games, from board-games that have extremely convoluted mechanics to the deer kind of game. He probably has a megaphone for his to yell out of, but he forgets to bring it 80% of the time, is a graffiti artist and vandalizes reds base everytime he gets.

Blue Heavy misunderstands a lot of words when said aloud. For example, when someone calls the Administrator a bitch, he thinks that the Administrator is a witch making death potions. He also likes Rams because he thinks that all they do is ram into things. He brings Trail mix wherever he goes. Blue Demo Man likes this, Blue Spy hates it.

I’ve already said stuff about Blue Scout, but I have more. He’s the source of Blue Team’s absurd amount of stolen IDs because he know they are clones that can’t buy their own things. Everyone else just thinks this is a hobby of his.

Blu Medic, is the calmest collected mind on his team, he is pretty sane and stable, hes cold and calculated though but has a soft spot for Blu Engineer, do to this calm and sane demeanor hes a pacifist and dose not fight instead he hides behind his team, do to being so peaceful hes a target for red medic who wants to study him and know why he looks like him.

Blu Soldier, hes the complete opposite of red soldier, he still has that drill sergeant personality but has normal smarts and battle filed smarts, making him the automatic leader of blu team, mostly due to him being the perfected clone blutarch and his scientists wanted.

Extras.

When Blu team came out of there tubes and we’re fully developed, blutarchs head scientist told them all that they were found on the streets and or came from really horrid backgrounds and are being given a second chance at life by serving blutarch, pretty much there brainwashed into believing that, so much that a good majority of them praise Blutarch and are extremely loyal to him, only one that isn’t is Blu Engineer.

All of Blu team went under extreme training and mental exercises, most of the mental exercises were abusive and extremely brain damaging, which is why Blu heavy is not that bright, again this was all brainwashing.

The head scientist was tasked with overseeing there development and correcting them if needed, they wanted them to be complete opposites of the Red team and wanted them to be the perfect war machines, so keeping them in line was important.

Which means making examples out of some of them.

also credit gos to my friend for all of these ideas without them I would have no clue with what to do for some of them.

#tf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 sniper #tf2 spy #tf2 scout #tf2 medic #tf2 engineer #tf2 heavy #tf2 pyro #tf2 demoman #tf2 blu team #gmod shenanigans #tf2 soldier

[starburstjuno]

High Emotions | Eddie Munson

plot : eddie gets his long-time customer, and crush, y/n to sit down and smoke some weed with him.

warnings : (underaged) marijuana use, drug dealing, eddie being stupid and in love, y/n being kind of bitchy and in love, just two idiots in love basically

word count : 737

(idk what this one is besties, it’s 2am, i’m high and i’m on the VERGE of sleep with only one man on the brain-edward fucking munson)

requests open | masterlist

“Really?” Y/N stared Eddie down, one eyebrow raised.

“Yeah, of course!” Eddie nodded. “Come on, let’s smoke together.”

“What’s the catch, Munson?” She couldn’t help but chuckle lightly. “Feels a little…fishy to me.”

“No catch.” He shook his head. “Can’t a guy just wanna hang out with his favorite customer?”

“Am I paying or what?” She asked, unable to help but be curious. She knew who Eddie was, and she was pretty confident Eddie wouldn’t try anything-but you never know. Especially when it comes to your local, small town drug dealer.

“Totally, completely free.” Eddie shook his head again, holding up a sandwich bag of weed. “Good shit, too.” Y/N chewed the inside of her cheek for a moment. Sure, there was a party over by Loch Nora she was planning on hitting up tonight. But, in the long run, what was an hour smoking weed on Eddie Munson’s couch to a whole night at a party?

“Fine.” She nodded, stepping inside Eddie’s trailer and snatching the weed from his hand as she made her way for the couch. Eddie happily shut the door behind her and turned on some music, taking a few minutes to sift through his tapes as he couldn’t decide what to play. Y/N was already loading her second bowl by the time he finally chose something and plopped down on the couch.

“Good stuff, right?” He asked, watching her take a hit. “My supplier’s going to a new guy who gets his stuff from the West Coast. Like, California and shit.”

“I know what’s on the West Coast.” She remarked through light coughs, handing the bong and lighter over to Eddie. Their hands brushed as she pushed the lighter into his, the metal of the rings on their hands clinking together. “But yeah, good stuff. I’m sure you make me pay out the ass for it.”

“Come on, I give you good prices!” Eddie argued. “How many times have I let you short me, Y/N?”

“Too many. I really don’t know why you keep selling to me.” She couldn’t help but chuckle. “If I didn’t know any better, Munson, I’d say you might be into me.”

“And what makes you say that?” Eddie laughed. He wasn’t sure if they’d ever actually spoken for this long, but he didn’t hate it.

“Well, there’s the fact that I never pay full price no matter what. And I get to come buy from your house which, according to just about everyone else, never fucking happens.” She started. “Not to mention the free samples, first picks, the ‘holiday gifts’. And of course, tonight. How many girls do you actually have over, Munson?”

“Plenty, thank you very much.” He defended, and they both laughed. She watched as he took his hit, a small smile curling up at her mouth as he coughed and set the bong on the coffee table. She reached over, pushing Eddie’s hair out of his face and more than drawing his attention. As if he wasn’t nervous enough, Eddie’s heart began to absolutely hammer when he saw the way Y/N was looking at him.

“Eddie, tell me something.” He could’ve died right then and there, hearing her say his first name. “Do you like me?” His throat was dry, he didn’t know what to say. He’d figured that he would be the one making moves, he’d be the one to take the initiative between them.

“I…” Eddie’s voice caught in his throat. “I um…”

“Let me tell you something.” She said, scooting closer. He nodded lightly, unable to take his eyes off of hers. “I don’t just buy from you because you give me good prices, Eddie.” Eddie swallowed, his tongue darting out to wet his lips quickly. “I buy from you because I like getting to see you. I like getting to smell your cologne and hear your laugh and your stupid jokes and see your smile. I like buying from you because it’s you.”

“Shit, Y/N.” The words finally stumbled out of Eddie’s mouth. “You lay all that on me right after I have a bowl?”

“What? Do you need another before we get all emotional and serious or do you not like talking about your emotions when you’re high?” She questioned, her head cocking to the side slightly. Eddie’s eyes were practically sparkling as he watched her, but before she could ask what again he’d pressed his lips against hers.

#eddie munson #stranger things #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson one shot #eddie munson imagines #eddie munson fic #stranger things imagine #stranger things imagines #stranger things one shot #stranger things fic #eddie munson x y/n #stranger things x y/n #eddie munson x reader #stranger things x reader

[ystrike1]

Ani-tachi no Aisarete, Korosarete - By Tooyama ema (7.5/10)

I love it when polyamory gets representation, but this is trash. 100% incest adjacent but-we're-not-blood -related-garbage. The absolutely nutty plot is jammed into four chapters, and the ending is rather obvious. Also. Every single male character in this story is obsessed with the same girl. I would love to see yandere polyamory, but this ain't it.

Mahiru is kind of a freak. She knows her brothers obsess over her and she kinda likes it. She is twenty now though, and she would like to be more independent.

All three brothers are yanderes, but the writing is almost unbearably bad. There's no buildup whatsoever. They also call her their sister while they say sexual things about her. Also the three brothers are twenty six, and she's twenty. Their parents died a long time ago, so she was raised by these men. It kinda...feels like they have been grooming her because they want her to be their shared wife.

The three brothers are identical, so they have slightly different hairstyles. Even Mahiru has trouble telling them apart, so you know the drill. One is blond. One has black hair and one has long hair.

All of them are also creepers in a different ways. Shinya obsesses over her health, and he controls what she eats. Yuuto takes care of her appearance. He buys all of her clothes. The third brother seems to be in charge of dazzling Mahiru. Asahi is the richest of the three, because he's an actor. He drives Mahiru everywhere in his sports car, and he makes sure that she's too spoiled to live on her own.

It's very nice to see a yandere united front, but again the writing is bad. I cannot stress this enough. So much potential was wasted it's unreal. Anyway, Mahiru goes to her generic university to ponder about her brothers. She doesn't find normal men attractive, because her doting brothers are too perfect. No normal man is capable of spoiling her the way they do. She's also a little obsessed with them, but she seems more normal than them...at first.

Grandpa dies.

Fuck grandpa.

Grandpa is the most fucked up character in this story by far. He leaves behind a doozy of a will, which makes Mahiru's life more even complicated.

Here's the deal. Grandpa left a 15 billion dollar fortune behind. He was an asshole to Mahiru's parents, but he repented on his deathbed. He regretted his behaviour, so...he says he'd love to give his fortune to Mahiru...but it's not traditional for the family money to go to a women...when there are male heirs running around. Grandpa says that the man who marries Mahiru gets the money. Also the fucked up bastard says the man that murders Mahiru can also get the money. At first we don't know why this was included...but duh...there's a secret fourth brother that wasn't included in the happy family...and he would never marry Mahiru. Plus he's jealous enough to kill her.

The game begins.

Nobody knows about the fourth brother (who actually is blood related) at this point. The triplets reassurance Mahiru. Frankly, they don't need the money. She doesn't have to worry about the inheritance. Her parents left her plenty of money. The whole family is kinda rich as fuck. They tell her not to worry about Grandpa's bullshit.

Shit hits the fan. She almost gets murdered by a guy in black, and a guy in white makes out with her (with tongue). It's dark so she can't identify either man, but Miharu isn't brain dead. She assumes that one of her brothers wants to marry her. She feels betrayed because she thinks another brother wants to kill her off for cash....

None of them want her dead. The phantom kisser is actually the three of them taking turns, because they want her to marry one or all of them??? Worst seduction tactic ever what the heck...

The black hoodie culprit is someone else.

Mahiru gets a DNA sample from the culprit, and she brings it to her brothers middle school friend Shougo. Shougo is also a doctor, who can test the hair sample and help her out. Unfortunately Shougo is also the secret fourth brother, and he's the only brother who is actually related to her. Nonsense happens. The whole murder attempt thing is resolved for no reason. There's a pretty lackluster action scene for one page, but then we skip to the real plot twist.

We get little hints at this, but yeah it's an ok ending. Mahiru's brothers thought she would choose one of them, but she loves being pampered and loved. After Shougo leaves the house she proposes to all three brothers. Then boom the last page is her being smug because this is what she wanted all along. She was just acting sweet. She didn't want independence. She wants to be obsessed over.

Hooray for consent kinda I guess...

#yandere #male yandere #yandere male #yandere boy #recommendations #recs #rec #recommended #manga #smut #Ani-tachi no Aisarete

[comfortabletextiles]

The spinners Book of yarn designs by Sarah Anderson, book review:

First things first: I SO EFFING LOVE THIS BOOK. BUY IT!!!

Like most books it starts with a nice and tidy chapter overview:

The introduction is just a bit of "what is this book for" a bit of the spinner history of Ms. Anderson, where she got all the ideas and so on.

Chapter 1, Spinning basics

is self-explanatory,

It talks about twist, and controll samples the basics of fiber prepping for spinning (carding , combing, working with dyed fiber) how to choose, what to look for, woolen vs worsted. For a book that is not ment to teach you spinning it's surprisingly detailed (not complaining there is always something to learn in the basics, or to remember)

Chapter 2, singles for plying

How to spin a good single, but So. Much. More!

How to spin a good single, what makes a single good, how thick/thin. Difference between wheels and handspindles. Tips and tricks to spin thin singles on a wheel. AND plying! Like, what kind of plying is out there (chain, bracelet, center pull ball how to trouble shoot etc), how do they behave what to ply together (2ply vs 3ply, and the difference they make in a knitted sample, trouble Shooting)

Chapter 3, stand-alone single

First a general information on how to deal with the different behaving anergy and on felting (some singles need to be felted before using them, but how do I do that)

Peppers through (in ALL chapters) are examples on the yarn and how it looks used (some are knitted, some crocheted and some weaved.)

For every yarn there is a detailed explanation on how to spin them what to look out for and detailed pictures to show the process, that help recreating the yarn

Also look at this cool thing?!?!? Just made with the enegery of the twist! It's plainly knitted, no pattern magic just spinning magic!!!

She also wrote out a very detailed recipe for "sizing" energized yarn. So it stays in form when stored, and after using it and washing the fabric all the energy comes back and makes some unbelievable cool effect (collapsed weave my beloved) how utterly cursed, how utterly beautiful, i want 20

Chapter 4 spiral yarn

In the beginning of this chapter, you have: how the tension shapes the yarn (more tension on the thin single, moderate tension on both, more tension in the fat single) general info on the finished yarn ( it is delicate, and should be used in projects according) also here we have a wonderful example in how the instructions are build

Name of the yarn with a bit of info, the singles you'll need to built it and the direction it is spun and plied (always telling you what fiber got used). And beautiful depiction of yarn and knitting(crocheting/weaving) with the yarn.

In this chapter she also teaches you how to incorporate beads into your yarn in different ways.

Chapter 5, opposing plies

What happens, if instead of 2 S spuns singles plied in Z, you take on S and one Z spun single to ply??? Well, at least 6 different beautiful yarns!

Also one amazing theme through this book, are Ms. Andersons Sock experiments. She takes the same fiber base, spins and plys one sock in basic ply and one in a different way. And then she wears them until the first hole appears to see what yarn construction is more sturdy. Absolutely amazing

Chapter 6, Bouclés

We all know Bouclés, i believe. But who spun them before?

The chapter starts with basic boucle technique 1O1 and takes you on a Wilde ride.

You guys have seen Bouclé in weaving??? I'm madly in love with it

She takes you throu basic bouclé like you know it. Showed differences between fibers, color possiblitys and "spiral bouclé" mixing bouclé with the spiral technique from chapter 4. Which is so insanely beautiful!

It finishes with: shrink bouclé. What happens if you ply a felting single with a not felting single? Spoiler: very cool stuff

Chapter 7, cable yarns

(how beautiful is this combination of color and construction??)

Two 2plys plyed together. Lots of things that could go wrong but if they go right you get a yarn that looks like a chain. How cool is that??? (Extremely) we get a lot of amazing yarns not limited to basic, beaded and dyed. Absolut Chefs kiss 👌

Chapter 8, crepe yarns

Looking forward to these, because I know exactly what fiber to use!

How to describe crepe yarn? That is DIFFICULT, because even if the construction is the same in every yarn, the use of singles and tension makes them absolute unrecognizable! If you get handed two crepe yarns you couldn't tell on the first glance! How is this the same construction method?!?!?

Same build as the other chapters. I want to live in this book. in total 7 crepe yarns that are full of love.

Chapter 9, core yarn

Do you remember the 90' where wrapping colorfully thread around your hair was the shit™?

Yeah, that! But better, because it's yarn! 12 different ways of coils are named in this chapter.

After that follows...

Soft core (this is not an asthetic, well maybe it is, but not in this chapter)

Your basic core spun yarn, in 3 different variations. Explained in detail. What's more to say?

Chapter 10, novelty yarn

Let's combine alle the cool things we learned in previous chapters and add little extras!

You meet an old acquaintance: the knop yarn that is followed by 7 different ways of making pigtail yarn. And then we have: beehives, cocoons, 3 ways of altering the cocoons (+one beaded inspiration) and something that makes my fingers itch with need for colorfull locks: tailspun!

Imagine this:

But SO colorfull!

The last yarn we get to know is "squiggle" a yarn with hiccups (or that giggles) either way it's adorable and very cute!

In the End we have a: glossary, Bibliography 👀, some acknowledgments, an index and some Bock recs.

On the VERY end there is a paper pocket with cards for all the yarns?!?!? HELLOOOO?!?!?

General opinion:

I LOVE this book it is the best book on spinning i have read so far detailed without being overwhelming. Also it is impossible to not notice how much care and love were involved. This is truly a book from a spinner to other spinners.

General information on the yarns and techniques are sprinkled between (like the sock experiment and how to work beads into the yarn)

It is well built, the chapters and everything is well sorted.

All in all, a loveletter to yarn.

Cons: i can't touch the samples. And that is TERRIBLE. Also i want to spinn all the yarns right now in an instant, but i don't have enough fiber, money, or time. A crime!!! Just Mean!!!

My tip: BUY THIS BOOK IF YOU DON'T ALREADY HAVE IT!!!

2023 we'll have a spin along to this book. More information will be on this blog shortly:

#sarah anderson #book review #book recommendation #hand spinning #yarn Design #srsly this is an amazing book #long post

[barry-j-blupjeans]

omg for the prompts could you do 11 with like. lucretia and magnus i think it has the potential to be rly funny jskfhkd

11. No I promise you’re supposed to pay for it actually. Obviously, I won’t rat you out but like, that was worth money

--

There's a complaint box outside of Lucretia's office that she rarely opened, let alone looked at. Sure, if there were notes starting to break through the sides of the box, she'd go through them. But that had only happened once when Brad was on vacation. Gods, Lucretia was still so grateful that Maureen had reminded her to make a HR. She did not have the energy to deal with complaints.

That being said: Sometimes she did have to deal with them. Notably, whenever someone cornered and talked to her about it. So when Lucretia stepped outside to go eat her lunch and was very abruptly confronted with Garfield the Deals Warlock, she knew it was going to be one of those days.

"DIRECTOR," Garfield said, with the loudness of someone who was trying to talk over the TV on full volume. "THERE IS A THIEF STEALING FROM MY STORE."

"From... the Fantasy Costco," Lucretia said.

"YES," Garfield said. "WHAT OTHER STORES DO I HAVE? DON'T ANSWER THAT. BUT YES, SOMEONE IS STEALING FROM FANTASY COSTCO! AREN'T YOU GOING TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT???"

Literally, what could Lucretia do in this situation? Nothing. She was a frail old woman. She had standards. She wasn't going to camp outside the store and watch.

Later that day, Lucretia's knees were begging for rest as she crouched down behind a checkout counter in the Fantasy Costco. She was bored. She was tired. She was hungry. She had Director Duties to fulfill, like pretending to do paperwork and lying about not being a Red Robe. Why was she wasting her time on time?

Simple answer. She had actual paperwork to do. But it could be done later. If she waited long enough, the Hunger would maybe eat the tax collectors.

It was nearly closing time and barely anyone had been in here all day. She had seen Angus, who politely pretended like she hadn't been staring at him and wished her a good day when she left. Avi hadn't seemed to notice her when he went to buy a bulk pack of energy drinks. One of the guards from the Voidfish's chamber took a break in here to walk around and try samples.

Right now, she was watching Magnus peruse the shelves carefully. He was looking along the weapons wall, nodding to himself quite a lot. Lucretia could be reading or taking a bath. Maybe even looking for further ways to get away with committing tax fraud. Instead, she observed as Magnus made a loud "hmmm" and nodded again.

And she almost missed it- she was getting tired enough that her eyelids were beginning to feel heavy, but she caught it at the last second. Magnus slipped a pocket knife down from the wall and slipped it into his pocket. He looked around and Lucretia ducked back down under the counter for a second. After a moment, she heard Magnus's footsteps going towards the door. When she peeked up again, he was leaving the Fantasy Costco, one pocket knife richer.

Lucretia followed. Quickly, because Magnus's legs were a bit longer than hers and she really didn't want to go down to their dorm this late at night.

"Magnus!" Lucretia said once they were a reasonable distance from the Fantasy Costco. Magnus turned and brightened upon seeing her, waving.

"Director!" he said.

"Magnus," she said, slowing to a stop. She was kind of out of breath. "Mag- just, oooh boy, just give me a second-"

"Take your time," Magnus said. She paused, leaning against her staff. Oof. She needed to be more physically active. Geez.

"Okay," Lucretia said. "Okay. So. You stole a knife."

"...no I didn't," Magnus said. Awful deception roll. Even more awful considering Lucretia knew all his tells.

"I saw you steal it, Magnus," Lucretia said.

"I am lawful good-"

"Neutral good at best," Lucretia said.

"It was a free knife," Magnus said. "No, uh, no price tag. That means it's free."

"No, I promise you're supposed to pay for it, actually," Lucretia said, having endured Garfield's whole rant earlier in the day. "I'm not gonna- obviously, I'm not gonna rat you out, because the Fantasy Costco is quite literally the only place to get groceries or- or anything, but like, that was worth money."

"I mean," Mangus said, floundering for a second. "Like, okay, it cost money. But does Garfield think I'm made of money? Like, fifty gold for a knife? C'mon!"

"That- that is a lot of gold," Lucretia said. "I could- I mean, I don't usually do that, but I could like, lend you some money? Not work-related money. Just as your, uhm, friend. And also because if you don't go back and pay for it, I'm going to have to sit through another three hours of Garfield explaining the economy to me and Magnus? Mangus, listen. I can't do that again."

"Yikes," Magnus said.

"Please, please go return the knife," Lucretia said. "Please."

"Can I have like... thirty minutes with it?" Magnus asked.

"To do what?"

"I'm learning rogue stuff!" Magnus said. "Like I said, lawful good. I wouldn't steal stuff unless someone asked me to.

"Carey," Lucretia said exhaustedly.

"Carey," Magnus confirmed. "So once I show her that I, y'know, got the knife, I'll take it back. Cross my heart."

"And you'll return the other stuff you've stolen?" Lucretia said.

"The- what? Oh!" Magnus laughed, shaking his head. "I didn't steal anything else. This is it. You gotta ask Taako for the other things."

"Of course I do," Lucretia said.

She could go back to her office. But then she'd be confronted with paperwork and her broken radio and the floor she told herself she'd sweep last week and ughhghghg. She sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose with her fingers for a second.

"And would you happen to know where Taako is?" Lucretia asked.

#magnus burnsides #lucretia #taz #taz balance #mine #asks #lexarga #ise cube writing

[abyssmalice]

Since the child wanted cake, Arlecchino is happily carrying over a whole cake for Tonia. With ten melusines behind her, two each carrying five more cakes to go with the first.

"Here, child." Arlecchino says, without any trace of a smile. "You were correct in wanting cake. So, I'm going to sit here and watch you eat all six cakes, right here and now. I did make sure to buy a variety of flavors for your enjoyment." Now she's smiling. "Bon appétit!"

Appearing with so much cake in tow is very, very suspicious - so much so that it doesn't even need to be said, it's just obvious. So it's only natural for Tonia to squint at the Harbinger, wondering what the catch is supposed to be...

A pair of meulsines trot by with a strawberry shortcake. It looks expensive, all of them do - can only be from Fontaine's finest bakery. And that's promising actually, because the girl has already sampled some of their goods on a few prior occasions, and they've yet to disappoint. That said, Arlecchino being the one to offer so many delightful cakes is still questionable; there's an immediate doubt if these were tampered with somehow—

A mango cream cake trots under her nose as she thinks that. Then a serving of chocolate mousse, and another pair of melusines with a black forest cake, the red cherries making for a striking and tantalizingly-sweet contrast to the more muted hues of the red velvet cake that Arlecchino first brought in.

Tonia watches the last pair walk over with a mixed fruit cake and wonders what she was thinking of a second ago.

"Well," the girl says, sitting down after all the cakes have been set on a table. "I'm glad you understand then! Definitely smarter than my brother - he always likes to stop me from eating all the cakes and sweets I want. Not that you've earned any favors from me—giving me cake is only a natural thing to do, I think. Though I'll consider it if you need my help on anything in the future."

Not. Tonia is going to eat all of these cakes and then forget it all happened. As she said - getting cake is only a natural thing. She happily stabs a fork into all six of the cakes within the next five minutes, enjoying herself regardless of it all.

...Even if Arlecchino's watchfulness was honestly kind of uncomfortable at the same time. Actually, what the hell is her deal, watching her eat? Is she hoping she dies or something from cake overdose?

Well! Tonia stabs her fork into the strawberry cake a little harder. The juice of the fruit runs a very thin pink as it mixes with some of the pink icing between the layers. The girl eyes the Harbinger for a silent moment, not saying or doing anything, before she resumes eating her cakes. With a little more viciousness and a determined line to her face, as though she were trying to prove something in the process.

Spite and stubbornness isn't Tonia's favorite flavor, frankly. It's an antithesis to the very point of eating a nice, sweet cake. But if it gets her through all six cakes without any problems, then who cares?

(Maybe if she treats half of the cakes like an early dinner... yeah, she should be able to eat all of them in one sitting. Probably. Probably.)

#ic | (heard and loved); #mmriesoftvat #(1 hr later cut to toni floating in the waters of fontaine like a round balloon filled with too much cake) #(also arle if u thought toni would say no to cake Ever then. lmao) #(puts a readmore bc i rambled too much on toni's cakes lol)

[butchviking]

shut the fuck up. binding is still safer than most alternatives and is literally the only way for some people to not be consistently suicidal over their bodies

not it isn't. literally it is not. for one thing, the safest alternative is to not compress your chest at all. but in this study (just about the only one you'll find with any decent sample size at all) commercial binders were actually associated with more negative health outcomes (20/28) than elastic bandages (14/28) or duct tape/plastic wrap (13/28).

i understand that dysphoria is very real & very distressing. trust me, i know. and there 100% absolutely needs to be better therapy options for dealing w that instead of medicalising it in such a dangerous way. & i get that it's an adults choice to take risks with their body if they want to. but 1. kids would definitely buy them. kids who arent even done growing yet nd definitely shouldnt be restricting their bodies and are not going to understand the risks. and 2. it's still just kind of. in poor taste to take a thing that is marketed as some sort of medical product to manage mental illness and make it into merch.

#dunno why u came in so hot on this btw. literally no need to be rude abt it but ok #ask #anonymous

[marypsue]

You know the drill, it's Sneak Peek Sunday and I'm here with samples from former heroes who quit too late, the third and final part of the AU where (almost) all the Hawkins kids have powers. Enjoy! Or don't, I'm not the boss of you.

...

It’s finally summer, and Robin Buckley is bored out of her mind.

Obviously she didn’t expect that working a minimum-wage job at a mall food court was going to be a font of constant entertainment. But she’d kind of hoped working with one-fourth of Hawkins High’s own resident superteam might mean at least a little excitement. The odd caped villain popping up to monologue dramatically on top of the freezer counter. Alien invasion in the storeroom. Little things, to break up the monotonous mundanity of existence.

Instead, her sole intellectual stimulation’s coming from helping Steve Harrington help his gaggle of impressionable youths sneak into movies without paying, and arguing with him over who has to refill the toppings. The only time Robin’s even seen Steve play the superpower card is to drive off the other gaggle of impressionable youths who like to hang around the food-court fountain and abuse Scoops Ahoy’s free sample policy. And even then, they’re always back in a day or two. Some superpower.

When Robin points this out to him, though, Steve just says, “I could make you do the toppings refills every time, if you really want,” and she realises she doesn’t need to see his powers in action that bad, after all.

She doesn’t even get to see Barbie all day, despite working in the same food court. The smoothie place Barb’s working at wouldn’t hire Robin too, and the manager is a tyrant and a sadist and never lets Barb take her breaks when Robin has hers. All they can do is cast commiserating miserable glances across the rows of tables in the middle of the food court when Robin has to mop the front, and swing by each other’s fine establishments to talk on their breaks. And the Orange Julius Caesar shoos Robin right off if she doesn’t buy something while Barbara’s working. Robin’s spent way too much of her hard-earned Scoops money working her way through every flavour they offer, and started again from the beginning. If she never sees crushed ice again in her life, it’ll be too soon.

So of course Robin’s interested, when she catches Steve and the toothless one with the curls – Henderson? Robin’s pretty sure it’s Henderson – hiding in the breakroom and playing a tape of nonsense, over and over and over again.

Okay. So ‘interested’ might be a slight overstatement. Maybe ‘pissed that Steve’s abandoned her to deal with the mall maggots alone, again’ is more accurate. But still. They’re doing something, and Robin would literally rather set herself on fire than keep manning the counter for one more second.

“Hey, shitbirds!” she announces, storming into the back room and grabbing the tape player from the middle of the shitty card table before either Steve or Henderson can stop her. She holds it over her head, out of at least Henderson’s reach, still spilling its weird droning message. “At least one of you is getting paid to be out front right now. Enough word puzzles.”

She doesn’t really have a lot of patience for the nonplussed look Steve and Henderson trade over the table.

“…word puzzles?” Henderson asks her, at last, and Robin frowns at him.

“Yeah? The week is long, doofus, but it’s not over yet, and if you dillweeds haven’t cracked this thing yet, then sitting back here staring at it isn’t going to make it happen. Do your job.” This she directs at Steve, who has the nerve to frown at her like she’s not making sense.

“Buckley,” he says, squinting at her the way he used to squint at the blackboard in Clicker’s class, “what the hell are you talking about?”

It’s Robin’s turn to stare at him like he’s not making any sense. Because he’s not.

“Your job?” she tries, after a moment. “I mean, I didn’t think you wore that outfit just because you liked the way it looked, but -”

“Hey,” Henderson interrupts, with growing excitement. “Forget about the job for a second. Can you understand what the tape is saying?”

And now Robin gets to stare at him like he’s not making any sense. Because neither of them are.

“I’m not solving your stupid puzzle for you,” she says, at last.

“Not the message, okay! Just the words. Do you understand the words that are coming out of that tape.” Henderson says it like he’s explaining a particularly simple concept to a particularly stupid child. “Do you recognise them.”

Robin glances over at Steve, but sees no help coming from that quarter. “…yes? Is this some kind of trick question?”

“That’s cool,” Steve says, breaking into a grin, like everything makes sense now. “Hey, Buckley, you’ve been holding out on us. You never said you could speak Russian.”

“What? I don’t -” Robin starts, and then sees what she’d seen but hadn’t taken in: the notebooks strewn across the card table, the open dictionary, the scribbled notes… “Wait, this is Russian?”

Henderson nods. Steve nods. Robin looks at the tape player. Now that she’s listening for it, she can tell they’re right. The words spilling out of it definitely aren’t English – the syntax and pronunciation are all wrong. But the message, nonsensical though it is, is coming through loud and clear.

“…huh,” she says, putting the tape player back on the table. “Must be similar enough to – Spanish, I guess.”

Henderson’s giving her some kind of eyeball. “Russian and Spanish are nothing alike,” he informs her imperiously, like he’s the polyglot here. And then his eyes go wide. “Steve. Robin Buckley – wasn’t she on Nancy’s list?”

“Whoa, whoa,” Robin asks. “What list?”

The bell at the front counter dings four or five times in quick succession. Steve huffs out a sigh, and yells, “Coming!”, pushing himself up out of his seat. Robin follows hard on his heels.

“No way. No. You are not getting out of this that easily – Harrington! What list!”

#this is mary's fic tag #stranger things #former heroes who quit too late #the hawkins indiana psychic baby boom #i did some development on a subplot and shuffled a few things in my outline and we are ROLLING on this one again

[golmac]

Inform 7 basics: deciding

Sorry I'm so late on Saturday's post! Today, I'll just do something short on "deciding," which is mechanically similar to the definitions we used in our last bit of code. Definitions are adjectives we can, well, define for use in our conditional statements. They involve broad categories, kinds, etc... narrowed down. For instance:

definition: a number is abysmal if it is zero.

Then, we can use constructions like this:

Instead of buying the sandwich when cash on-hand is abysmal: say "You have no money to pay for that!".

Now, in this silly example, it's easy to keep track of zero and type it in as needed, but if we were dealing with several ranges of numbers in multiple situations, things would get error-prone and messy very quickly.

"Decisions" in Inform 7 are conditions that we can use in our rules. We can do things like this:

After examining something: now the noun is examined.

to decide if the paradox is fulfilled: if the evil altar is examined: decide yes; otherwise: decide no.

This is a very simplistic example. We can make rules or conditional text with "if the prophecy is fulfilled" as a conditional. In this case, though, there isn't a clear point. We could just use the "examined" value in our own rules.

But we could be dealing with something far more complex. We could have a lot of conditions we want to apply consistently. Rather than typing an awkward if... otherwise tree repeatedly in various rules across our game, we can formulate a "decision" rule once, give it a reasonable and memorable name, and go from there.

Here's some sample code from a current WIP. I'll talk us through it.

to decide if the paradox is already fulfilled: let CA be the current action; if there is an anomaly of the CA in the table of causal anomalies: choose row with an anomaly of CA in the table of causal anomalies; if turns passed entry is greater than zero: decide yes; otherwise: decide no; otherwise: decide no.

Don't worry too much about the technical aspects of the code. It's looking up something in a table and using it to "decide." For us, as beginners, an important point is that some complex conditions are best dealt with one time in code. Keying this verbatim in multiple rules could invite typos, make the code look like spaghetti, and so forth.

Personally, I recommend thinking about definitions anytime you find yourself making a complex or hard-to-read set of conditions for a rule. Even if you only plan to use it once, setting it apart can make it more readable and, if needed, extensible.

Note that this example creates a truth state on-the-fly that we can start using right away. We can skip a lot of rework and add readability to our code with constructions like:

the description of the evil altar is "[if the paradox is already fulfilled]It seems to throb horrifically. The horror from beyond is already on its way! It cannot be stopped.[otherwise]There is something ominous about the altar, but you can't quite put your finger on it yet.".

or...

Before doing something when the paradox is already fulfilled: say "What's the point? We've tried that before. It never works."; stop the action.

Decisions are a good way to handle sets of conditions in a consistent and readable way. If you've been reading these posts since the beginning, think of how much simpler those early examples with the railgun would have been with some clear definitions and decisions. We could simplify tons of conditional statements for sure. Maybe I'll whip something up for next time....

#inform 7 #interactive fiction #parser #i7 for beginners #i am not a programmer irl

[starsmaligned]

WANTED PLOTS stars (click to see muses)

zeki / capricorn

zeki works many jobs. some days he works as a barista during the morning rush, some evenings he works as a busboy, then some nights he works late at the clubs, cleaning up and delivering drinks around the club. but one familiar face keeps popping up at very job, and zeki begins to wonder if he's actually being stalked, or if it's all just a coincidence

shushu, a stereotypical fluffy white dog, has become infatuated with zeki's next door neighbour. zeki isn't the happiest about the situation, but has started sitting outside after dinner so shushu can enjoy the company of his neighbour through the balcony bars, and slowly but surely zeki comes to find a friend in his neighbour ( can stay platonic but can be turned romantic if the chemistry and want is there )

more tba

enoch / aquarius

enoch is a bit lazy - or rather, his head is always in the clouds. his neighbour has started making extras for dinner, making sure enoch eats meals ( and also avoids any more fire alarms being set off, which is a burden to all neighbours ). in return, enoch helps buys groceries and does the dishes - which is a nice little deal for both of them, and the aquarius enjoys the routine dinner plans they have

more tba

llyr / pisces

llyr is a known wanderer. your muse often finds him in the same park every morning, even begins to bring him an extra meal, thinking he is a homeless lad. but llyr begins to bring back the containers with meals in it, thinking they were just friends exchanging food. a conversation is needed to explain the situation, llyr thinks

a lost boy. he wandered a little too far this time, and he's found himself in a completely unknown area, perhaps even a dangerous area. normally he would just sit and wait for his brothers to find him, but there was no where safe to wait. your muse, seeing him in trouble, takes him in for a few days, making friends with this strange, water obsessed male who's eyes seem to glitter with wonder ( and stars )

more tba

kristofel / aries

tba but seriously he needs a friend to take the stick out of his ass he's so fucking uptight jesus christ

thelonious / theo / taurus

theo is too stubborn and wants everything to be perfect, which often means he works himself to the ground out of stress, and drives himself to artist block. while out and about, he spots your muse, and instantly knows he needs them around, whether as a model or not, because they bring an insane amount of inspiration to his life, helping him out of his creative block ( can turn romantic if the chemistry and want is there )

some nights, theo goes out to avoid cy, his brother and roommate. he's not the biggest clubber, but he goes out and sees a stranger wearing some of the clothing he designs. he goes up to speak to them, to ask what they thought about it, while trying not to let up that he's the designer ( and perhaps he's failing at it ). eventually he ends up using that person to send samples of new products to, to see how someone outside of the designing world views or likes his clothing and whether it'll be well received or not

more tba

yves / one half of gemini

yves is a psych major, and kind of hung up on a past relationship. he can psychoanalyse himself all he wants, he knows its irrational, but he is still hung up on them. to get rid of memories of them he rents out their old room, but didn't expect his new roommate to take up the space left in his heart

he doesn't even belong to any clubs, so why is he here? he had to take the spot of a mutual friend to help at a club booth during orientation week, and while he would usually hate this kind of thing, the person he is helping run the booth gets along extremely well with him, and perhaps he would join the club too, just to spend more time with them

(plot including cy) the universe is sick of the bickering between the two, deciding to give them a sitter of sorts, someone who has to live with the two of them and play referee, to try and get them to sort out their differences

more tba

cy / second half of gemini

classic good vs neutral evil. cy is not interested in much in life, but your muse always seems to be around when something cy touches mysteriously goes missing. cy tends to think of it like a game, and one time after they sit and have a more serious talk, cy opens up a little more, and perhaps thinks of your muse as more of a friend than originally thought

cy is responsible for a lot of bad things happening to innocent people. at least, he was in the past. and sometimes that catches up to him, especially at night. he spends most nights sleepless, wandering the streets and just thinking, sometimes running from his thoughts. he somehow runs into your muse on a regular basis ( whether they be a worker at an all hours convenience store, or just another night dweller ) and slowly reveals his past - he doesn't know why he's comfortable enough to spill the beans, but without realising he has become comfortable enough to tell his almost entire life story to a stranger he barely knew

(plot including yves) the universe is sick of the bickering between the two, deciding to give them a sitter of sorts, someone who has to live with the two of them and play referee, to try and get them to sort out their differences

more tba

sauveur / cancer

being a doctor, he sees a lot of patients come through those doors at the hospital. but he sees your muse pretty often, usually for some clumsy reason. it creates a sort of bond, and always puts a smile on his face whenever he sees them. but one day they come in a little worse for wear, and he is forced to use his powers more than he normally would to heal them, not willing to give up their life just yet, a rare selfish moment for the cancer

with all of his brothers moving out of home, it had begun to feel a little bit empty in his house - even though he has shimkoong, it's not the same! one day he finds your muse needing a place to stay ( whether they be homeless, needing to be closer to uni, needing to move out due to a bad situation, etc ) and he's more than willing to let your muse move in, happy to have another mouth to feed and someone to talk to - roommate bonding ensues ( can turn romantic if the chemistry and want is there )

shimkoong and your pet have a close bond, one that sauveur indulges in because he likes seeing his princess happy - and its nice for him to make a friend outside the brothers and work

more tba

othniel / leo

othniel had been a protector, ever since his first life on earth. he sees your muse being attacked, whether by bullies, thugs or anything of the like and steps in, protecting your muse and fighting on their behalf. it becomes a somewhat silent bond from that point, othniel always looking out for your muse and keeping them safe - until one day your muse finally strikes up a conversation with them, and the friendship can begin from there

the leo is scarred in many places from previous fights, but it doesn't stop him from adding new ones from new fights. othniel always comes and finds your muse after a scuffle, coming to be patched up and looked after - it makes him feel a little more special, always having someone to care for his bruises and cuts and scrapes after protecting someone. he wouldn't admit it, but he likes the gentle way your muse touches him, cares for him instead of using him as protection. one day your muse gets attacked, and nothing can stop the leo from tracking them down and getting revenge for hurting one he holds so dear

more tba

arek / virgo

arek fell in love with his job as a lecturer. however, there is one thing that irks him - your muse, who works at the university ( whether as another lecturer, or as a receptionist ). it's not that he hates your muse, but it's just that they always challenge him, they always have opposing views but it drives him crazy in the best way possible, always looking forward to their next conversation but HATING that conversation nonetheless

arek is known for packing up and going camping. one night while sitting by the campfire your muse appears, and asks to sit at his fire. he agrees, and even leaves a bed for your muse in his tent. he's not sure where your muse comes from, whether you're just another hiker, or some kind of mystical being, but he tries to return to that spot at least once a month, to have your muse return to keep him company once again.

more tba

septimus / libra

this boy literally has so many plot ideas already, there's too many to put here, just ask for him and I'll give you a small list if you want

victorien / scorpio

he is a hard boy to deal with and i am not even sure what plots he could do because it takes a LOT for him to warm up to someone and get past his fuckboy persona

evander / sagittarius

kinda a mix of septimus and victorien - so many plot ideas already, but takes a lot for him to warm up to someone. loves his dog named Dog, so animal loving muses can line up

elio / the sun

idk man but please can someone have this himbo for something other than his looks as well he has a great personality if you can get past the big tiddies. he's very passionate about fitness and really wants to find ways to be happy in gloomy weather

luan / the moon

a little recluse. lives in the woods, perhaps he can befriend someone from the city who can help him get things that he needs without him having to venture into the city?

idk man i'm just a massive sucker for the 'you were attacked by something in the forest and i saved you and bought you here let me nurse you back to health' trope

mystical beings befriending each other

cethin / the eclipse

so many plots but hard to get close to

idk please socialise this boy

watch out he bites

#out of constellations #wanted plots

[mariacallous]

In February 2022, Ukraine’s tech sector was booming. Between 2016 and 2021, the country’s IT exports tripled to nearly $7 billion a year, according to the IT Association of Ukraine. Its universities have long been a formidable production line for STEM talent, and thousands of these young graduates helped Ukraine first become Europe’s back office, stocked with developers and designers working for international clients, and then an innovation center in its own right, with a flow of cutting-edge startups: From deep-tech and robotics to translation and AI.

The war should have ended that. Russia’s full-scale invasion has killed or injured tens of thousands of civilians and soldiers, many of them pulled from ordinary lives onto the front lines. Millions have been displaced from their homes and are now scattered across Europe and beyond. Russia has targeted infrastructure, knocking out power and telecoms and threatening to cut Ukrainian businesses off from their customers and backers overseas.

And yet, the tech sector has not just survived but thrived: By the end of 2022, Ukraine’s IT exports had grown nearly 7 per cent, even as the economy shrunk by almost a third. These are the stories of how four startups have survived, but they’re just a sample of the thousands of acts of extraordinary resilience, defiance, courage, and cooperation in Ukraine’s tech sector.

“Music is a very powerful instrument.”

As a PhD student in quantum physics in the dying days of the Soviet Union, Andriy Dakhovskyy would hide bootlegged vinyl of western rock music in his room. “I was lucky not to be caught by the KGB,” he says. “When the Soviet Union fell and you could easily go to a record store and buy Led Zeppelin, something important was missing for me. The feeling of exclusivity, of being underground.”

Dakhovskyy spun his forbidden love of rock into a career, ending up establishing Universal Music’s first office in Kyiv, and becoming a central figure in the development of Ukraine’s music industry in its anarchic post-Soviet revival. He got Elton John onto Ukrainian TV and produced Kyiv’s first rock opera. As we drive through central Kyiv, he points out the nightclub he ended up running, kind of by accident, after being convinced to invest in it by a friend in need of a loan. It’s now closed, battered first by Covid, then by the war.

In 2020, Dakhovskyy launched Djooky with business partners in Ukraine and the US, based on a belief that less well known recording artists—particularly those from outside America—get a raw deal on platforms like Spotify, where only a small number of high-profile musicians make good money. “The music industry is heavily, heavily monopolized and centralized,” he says. “I know the system … and I couldn’t change the system from within.”

Djooky is a marketplace where fans can essentially buy shares in artists, helping them to build a profile, with the potential to profit from their success. When the Eurovision Song Contest was canceled due to the pandemic in 2020, the company launched its own Djooky Music Awards, letting fans vote for their favorite song in a huge multinational competition that attracted artists and listeners from all over the world. The platform has 200,000 registered users, submissions from artists from more than 140 countries, and has held 15 successful auctions.

Dakhovskyy knows Djooky is a strange kind of startup, a hybrid of a record company and a fintech—one which VCs need to grasp on an emotional level, as well as a financial one. He is a low-key but compelling speaker with an infectious enthusiasm for music, but for most of the past two years, he’s been stuck in Kyiv, first pinned down by the pandemic and then by the full-scale invasion. Over the winter, he says, he barely left his apartment, other than to trudge down the stairs to the bomb shelter. Djooky had to put its prize-giving on hold.

Then, in the spring,“I thought, fuck the war,” he says. In March, Dakhovskyy made the 14-hour overland journey to Warsaw to pitch Djooky to a crowd of international investors at an event organized by the tech giant Google. When we meet in Kyiv two months later, he’s just returned from the US, where a delegation of Ukrainian startups pitched to US business and political leaders. “I had only a four-minute speech,” he says. “So it was a choice between either being open and emotional, to speak about the subject, which is my love, which is the job of my dream. Or just, like, machine-gun through the numbers. I chose to be emotional.”

He’s still waiting for a VC to come through with funding, but he’s restarting the Djooky Music Awards this August. His pitch now kicks off with a ballad by a Ukrainian artist, Kler, recorded in the spring of 2022, as Kyiv was still under siege and Russian tanks were just 20 kilometers from her studio. “I give her as an example because she simply cannot imagine she can do anything else but make songs and perform them for people. No matter if there are air raids and shelling, she's in the studio,” he says. “Music is a very powerful instrument.”

“We call it war-life balance.”

On the first night of the war, Roman Sevast and Stacy Pavlyshyna drove west out of Kyiv. Russian forces had swept across eastern Ukraine and were converging on the capital. American banks had halted withdrawals for Ukrainian clients, wary of impending sanctions on Russia. But the startup founders still had to make payroll.

So, as a Russian attack helicopter buzzed low over their car on the edge of the city, Sevast was on the phone to their bank manager in the US. In the darkness, the bank’s security systems couldn’t recognize Sevast’s face, so the pair pulled over to the side of the road. He peered into the screen, lit by the dashboard light, just long enough to pass the verification checks. Then they sped onwards.

A few months prior, Sevast and Pavlyshyna had opened a new office in Kyiv, with a full-sized yellow helicopter dominating the lobby. The startup they founded together, Awesomic, had recently graduated from the Silicon Valley incubator Y Combinator and raised a $2 million round. For a monthly fee, Awesomic matches businesses all over the world with designers and developers—most of them Ukrainian—like a kind of bespoke Fiverr on subscription that’s built, like much of the country’s tech sector, on abundant, affordable talent.

Sevast, Awesomic’s CEO, and Pavlyshyna, its COO, are both small-boned, slender, dressed in black. When we meet in Warsaw, on the fringes of a Google for Startups event, they talk over one another in a rush of overlapping sentences, finishing each other’s stories, correcting details. “It was a great life,” Pavlyshyna says. “We just had this life for a few months,” Sevast interjects. “And then the war started.” He has a picture on his laptop of the two of them, on the fourth day of the war, in a bomb shelter, eating a cake for his 26th birthday. “Celebrating,” he says.

The first few weeks were a rush of logistics: getting employees, who were scattered across Ukraine, out of cities under siege. The company hired a “kamikaze driver”—a local who knew secret back roads, to extract a designer from a town close to the Russian border. The designer had been hiding in a basement for two weeks, but had kept on working. Burying herself in work was, she told Sevast, an escape from the horror: “The only place where I can have a stable mindset.” This, Sevast says, is the approach that he and many others in the country have settled on to get through the dark days. “We call it war-life balance.”

The outsourcing industry can feel very transactional—freelancers and contractors are just email addresses in some far-off, low-cost country. (Upwork annoyed many Ukrainian freelancers by sending a note to clients in late January 2022 warning of disruption to its service in the case of an invasion). But Awesomic’s founders say their clients have stuck with them, even as Russia attacked civilian infrastructure, knocking out power and internet access, threatening to take the country offline for long periods. Awesomic bought generators and Starlink terminals, and the work went on. “We’ve done the craziest things as managers,” Pavlyshyna says.

The company kept on growing through 2022, reaching “multimillion-dollar” revenues, according to Sevast. After they moved their Ukraine operations to safe zones and got their people set up and working, the founders moved on to their next milestone, opening a new head office in Silicon Valley, where Pavlyshyna and Sevast are now based. “We believe that we can go through anything. The startup journey, it’s not scary when we’re already going through this,” says Pavlyshyna. “Resilience isn’t really a choice.”

“I see missiles, but I will deliver it in a couple of hours.”

Howly’s offices are in an airy, brick-walled warehouse in central Kyiv, with a gym space and glass-walled meeting rooms on the mezzanine floor. They’ve had to abandon it twice. The company, which is less than two years old, offers an online concierge service for customers all over the world. At the basic level, it’s like tech support for your day-to-day life. Experts, most of them in Ukraine, will help you figure out how to set up your smart TV, or get into an email account after you’ve lost the password. Some customers use the platform like a personal assistant, seeking restaurant recommendations and travel advice. The longest troubleshooting session lasted eight hours.

In the days following the full-scale invasion, most of Howly’s staff joined the enormous queue of people flowing to the relative safety of the west of Ukraine, spending upwards of 24 hours in the traffic jams reaching out of Kyiv. A couple of employees had near misses: One person’s house was destroyed around him, another was hit by debris from a missile. But once everyone was out, they got back to work. “The week after the war started, we had to put everything back in place,” says Slava Matskov, Howly’s CEO. “People were ready to work 24/7. They were calling us saying, ‘OK, I see the planes flying next to me, I see missiles, but I will deliver it in a couple of hours. So, no worries.’ That was amazing.”

By the autumn, they were all back in Kyiv. Matskov prefers his team—which has grown from 30 at the start of the full-scale invasion to 41—to be in the office. But then Russia started hitting power stations and telecoms infrastructure. Some days, the electricity was only on for a few hours at a time. As temperatures fell, Howly once again moved the whole team west, to where it had generators and Starlinks set up to keep the lights on and the internet running. Employees brought with them family members and even pets. “I think the electricity was cut, like, 10 times a day. And after the electricity drops, you hear somebody running to the generator,” Matskov says. In mid-January, the team voted to return to Kyiv.

The war has pushed Howly to speed up its plans to diversify. It’s branching into legal advice, signing up lawyers who can spend a few hours online to answer queries from users. And it’s moving into Spanish language services. Growing in the current environment isn’t easy—venture capitalists are leery about investing in a leadership team that’s entirely based in a war zone. But there is still some money available, and the war has driven a new kind of solidarity and mutual support within the tech sector—whether that’s unicorns reinvesting into the ecosystem, or companies sharing generators and survival tips. “All the biggest tech companies in Ukraine, starting February 24, they just work together,” Matskov says. “The cooperation was amazing.”

"In 10 to 20 years, Ukraine will be the new Silicon Valley.”

January 1 is a huge day for the health and well-being industry. It’s when millions of people, fired up by their New Year’s resolutions, sign up for gym memberships and fitness apps, and order sportswear and wearable tech. To prepare for the start of 2023, Victoria Repa ordered $300,000 worth of generators and water-treatment equipment for the BetterMe office in Kyiv. Russia was in the middle of a ferocious campaign of air raids that targeted civilian infrastructure, including power stations and water-treatment plants, and Repa needed to make sure her team could get online, stay warm, and have access to showers and clean water. “It’s strange,” Repa says, laughing at the absurdity of it. “But we compete with companies that aren’t in this situation, so we don’t have time to complain.”

Before the war, Repa was planning BetterMe’s path to IPO. She launched the company as a health and well-being app in 2016, offering consumers, mainly in the US, access to home workouts and coaching. The app has been downloaded 150 million times. The most popular workout at the moment is “Wall Pilates,” which is, as it sounds, a series of contortions that you can do at home, up against a wall. The vision, Repa says, is “creating happiness within,” and building health care products that feel like entertainment. “In reality, we compete with Netflix, we compete with Instagram, TikTok for people’s attention.”

BetterMe, which has more than 200 employees in Kyiv, always had a “plan B” to relocate people to the west of Ukraine if the Russians invaded, which they triggered in February last year. “It’s not something I’d ever learned at business school,” Repa says. “But the war changed everything.” After the capital was liberated, many of the staff returned. They’ve continued to launch new products, including sportswear and fitness bands.

The company grew its headcount and revenue by 20 percent in 2022, and Repa—like others in the tech industry—says that success is now about more than just making money. “It's highly important, not only as a business mission, but also how we can help our country.” The unemployment rate in Ukraine hit 20 percent last year, and keeping the economy going is vital for the war effort. BetterMe has made its mental health products available free to all Ukrainians, and created a stress management course with the World Health Organization.

Repa has had to balance being with her team with being able to access investors and partners overseas. From Kyiv, it is a long slog on a train to the Polish border, so she’s temporarily relocated to Warsaw. But she says it’s important that, even though BetterMe’s customers are in the US, Western Europe, and Asia, the company remains Ukrainian. “I hope that in the future after the war … that young people stay in Ukraine, build businesses in Ukraine, grow in Ukraine,” she says. “It’s my patriotic mission that, in 10 to 20 years, Ukraine will be the new Silicon Valley.”