Tumgik
#chicken hyung
luvelii · 4 months
Text
Dungeon meshi has wonderful and thought out world building but the inherent creator bias still shows through sometimes in small funny ways
23 notes · View notes
hotasfahrenheit · 5 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
It's spicy, but I can't stop eating it.
[All The Liquors, Episode 3]
15 notes · View notes
bubmyg · 1 year
Text
speaking of jk sightings im obsessed w hueningkai saying jeongguk made him try his dirt tea when he saw him in the hall after a schedule one day
9 notes · View notes
jaylaxies · 4 months
Text
ENHYPEN REACTION: to you being in the rival house at Hogwarts
Tumblr media Tumblr media
PAIRING: enhypen hyung line x fem!reader
GENRE/CW: smut, slytherin!hee with gryffindor!reader, slytherin!jay with hufflepuff!reader, ravenclaw!jake with gryffindor!reader, gryffindor!sunghoon with slytherin!reader
WC: 4.7k words
WARNING: 18+ content, minors dni
A/N: hihi, my loves <3 this was requested by my anonnie here and i loved writing about enha and hogwarts omg! all likes, comments, reblogs are highly appreciated! it keeps me motivated! iloveyou all and happy reading <33
Tumblr media
Slytherin!Heeseung x Gryffindor!reader
Trope: Headboy x Headgirl
Heeseung was beyond elated when he got his letter back at the manor, stating how he had become the head boy of Hogwarts. His family of pure bloods were even prouder, however, his cocky smirk dropped the second he met with the entirety of the prefectorial board at the Hogwarts express, prefect compartment to be precise.
Seeing you standing there with the batch stating ‘head girl’ was not something he wanted to see, not when you were someone who came from a non wizarding background, someone who was in Gryffindor.
How could they make you the head girl? How could they think he’d be willing to spend his time working with you of all people. His hatred for your likes was visible from day one, his taunts and threats didn’t bother you, and that’s exactly what bothered him. The urge to make your life living hell was his motto more or less, even more so this year.
“It’s absurd, man. Let her be now, it’s our last year here for Godric’s sake,” Jay huffed out, irritated that Heeseung couldn’t shut up about the new Gryffindor quidditch captain giving you too much attention despite your blood status.
“It doesn’t fucking matter, why do people like her anyway? What happened to keeping the muggles away from the likes of us?” He gritted his teeth, accidentally stabbing the piece of chicken too hard with his fork at dinner. The sight of you snuggling close to the said captain infuriated him more than he let on.
“Well, she’s not a muggle if she can do magic, and extraordinarily well at that,” Jay offered, having done with Heeseung being a dimwit and not realizing the truth behind his anger.
“Wow, thanks for the support, mate,” Heeseung rolled his eyes, looking back at you again.
He’d make sure to wipe that smile off of your face while taking rounds later—at least that’s what he promised himself. Taking rounds was probably the time he looked forward to the most, given that it was the perfect time to criticize and show hatred towards you.
However, the second you meet up at the staircase, telling him to divide areas since you do not wish to work with him anymore, he loses it. He completely loses it, scoffing and grabbing your wrist, pulling you into the room of requirement right behind you.
“What the fuck—” you tried to scream, but he was quick to cover your mouth with his hand.
“What? Can’t even look my way now that you have a quidditch captain chasing you around?” He scoffs, eyes full of hatred, the kind you had never seen before and it made you scoff.
“Well, newsflash, Lee. I never wanted to look your way from the very start. In case you haven’t noticed, it’s you who’s clearly obsessed with me,” you seethed out, not caring about the proximity despite your breathing getting heavier.
“Ah? Me obsessed with the likes of you? Don’t flatter yourself, darling,” he said, tone almost challenging, his hold on your wrist tight, just like the hand that was grabbing your waist now, making you gulp but not back down.
“So, it shouldn’t matter to you if I snog my quidditch captain, or more,” you whispered with a smug smile, feeling his hand squeezing your waist tighter.
“You cannot do that,” he warned.
“Oh but I did—”
You couldn’t finish your statement and nor could Heeseung control his actions anymore, pressing you up against the wall and shoving his tongue down your throat, kissing you in the messiest way he could muster to mush out all the sane thoughts coming his way.
This was the sanest he had felt in ages.
“You’re fucking mine,” he groaned against your lips.
“No, fuck I’m not,” you smirked, testing him further, loving how he had finally given in to the truth—that he wanted you.
The room of requirement was sly, preparing a bed as he pushed you on it, getting on top of you while getting rid of his robes, “oh, babe, I’ll show you who you belong to.”
“Took you way too long, Lee,” you chuckled, gasping the second he pushed your panties aside, feeling your wetness on his fingers with a smirk.
“Been waiting, eh?” He asked, cocky as he pushed two fingers in with ease, your back arching as you moaned.
“Talk about yourself,” you smirked, pulling him into another rough kiss, messy of all sorts as he sucked on your tongue, pumping his own cock by lubricating it with your wetness.
He wasted no time, in aligning himself to your entrance, pushing his cock in one go to bottom out, groaning at the tightness that squeezed him, thrusting almost instantly when he saw nothing but pleasure on your face with a promise to claim you his.
“Fuck, I knew you’d make a perfect whore, always so desperate for my attention,” he groaned, snapping his hips to yours, the noise resonating the room.
“You can’t even thrust properly, ah—” he sped up to shut your mouth, your toes curling as you held on to him for support, chanting his name like a mantra the whole time as he proved just how much and how well he can fuck you.
All night.
Tumblr media
Slytherin!Jay x Hufflepuff!reader
Trope: Animagi Jay
It took him a lot of patience.
In fact, it took everyone in his friend group a lot of patience to keep their mouths shut for a whole month, a single mandrake leaf resting in their mouths. However, they wanted to do something iconic, which would be—turning into an animagus to cause trouble whilst being unregistered at that. The whole process was tedious.
Jay was losing his last bit of sanity, watching you smiling softly and being kind to others, which was a usual thing per se.
The only problem was how he couldn’t verbally bother you.
It was known to be his favourite pastime, inserting himself in your life and bothering you for existing.
Why? Because that’s what he should do, being a slytherin. He had a personality he needed to live up to, and he knew hell would break if anyone as much as gets a hint about Jay’s infatuation with you.
The solution? To make sure he says the meanest things so he wouldn’t have to see your smile. You don’t get why he’s mean to you. His hatred goes as far as it concerns you, and you’ve never seen him calling anyone else names but you.
So, seeing you being happy and not once thinking about him since he put the leaf in his mouth had his blood boiling, especially when you agreed to attend Slughorn’s party with a random ravenclaw boy. The same party he was gonna ask you to attend with him—or bully you into attending with him, but the smile on your face gets him mad.
He scoffed, ignoring the whole situation and focusing on the transformation process, completely missing the look of sadness on your face when he left without even acknowledging your presence, his mind deep in different thoughts.
Of course you’d be happy without him.
However, the success in becoming an animagi had him smiling. He was a big black cat—a royal panther, while his other friends turned into a bird and a dog.
He went out to explore the place in his animal form, getting out of Hogwarts castle to visit the black lake, not once thinking that he would find you here at night.
Your back looked peaceful as you stared at the lake, and he was silent as he made his way towards you, almost scaring you the second you saw a black panther settling down next to you, a gasp leaving your mouth as your eyes shined under the moonlight.
“Hi, I’ve never seen you around before,” you spoke up, fascinated, extending your hand to stroke his fur.
Jay didn’t expect this, and he knew he didn’t have to pretend in this form, making him purr with pleasure as you gently caressed him. He was a cat after all. The warmth of your kindness was driving him crazy, he so desperately wanted you to like him back, but he knew you wouldn’t.
It became a routine for him to sneak out to meet you at night in his animal form, and he adored how you shared all your secrets with an animal, talking to him, letting him rest his head on your lap and as far as kissing his head in adoration.
He was in love with you.
He loved how you welcomed him with a pretty smile, the same smile which he wipes off your face in his human form.
Everything was going smoothly, to the point Jay had even started staring at you between classes, not being as rude as he used to be before and you never hesitated on smiling back at him, ever so kind. He wanted to talk to you, face to face, and confess.
However, that plan went down the drain. The same Ravenclaw boy was seen standing close to you, a conjured flower in his hand which he presented to you with a wide smile while Jay watched it unfold with the nastiest scowl on his face.
So being petty, Jay practically shoved you out of the way, not looking back even after hearing a little “ouch” coming from your direction as you stumbled, ignoring when you called out his name, rather proceeding to the next class.
He didn’t see you there, and he tried not to act affected by your absence, assuming that you’d have gone with the other guy, relaxing when he saw you in potions class again, his eyes never leaving your face which looked distressed. Especially after you took a sniff of the amortentia, the love potion.
His heart lurched, wondering if you smelled the other guy. And in his case, he knew he was doomed the second he took a sniff and instantly smelled of your body lotion and your favourite delicacy. His eyes met yours that very second and he had to gulp, looking elsewhere to pretend that he was fine.
That night, with a heavy heart, he sat down next to you in his animagi form yet again, this time he found you at the astronomy tower, a bandage around your arm.
“Hey, love,” you welcomed the black panther, “it’s such a pretty night,” you sighed dreamily, petting the panther next to you.
“You mind if I talk?” You asked, chuckling when the panther nodded as if he understood what you meant, “I don’t understand boys. I really like this guy but he’s been mean to me to see. It’s pathetic, isn’t it? That I smelled him in the love potion and he’s the reason why I stumbled and hurt my arm—I just can’t help it, I wish Jay would like me back but he doesn’t even look my way without wanting to look away or just comment about how I’m just a weak Hufflepuff girl,” you mumbled, not focusing on how the panther had stood up all of a sudden.
Jay’s heart thumped, he wasn’t sure if he heard it right, but it was too much, he couldn’t wait anymore.
He transformed back into his human form right there, your eyes widening as you opened your mouth to scream, which he put a hand over to muffle your voices.
“That—that was you!” You whisper-yelled, shoving him away.
“Did you mean it?” He asked, grabbing your wrist which made you lean against the wall, “that you like me?”
You could barely breathe, biting your lip as you nodded, “I know you hate me—”
“Oh, you know nothing, baby,” he chuckled, grabbing your nape and pulling you into a kiss, making your eyes widen before he pulled you even closer, making you kiss him back eventually, getting fervent with your actions.
“Fuck, I like you so much. It was you who I smelled, in the love potion, I mean. I’m sorry for being an asshole, I never knew how to handle feeling this way for you,” he apologized, cutting the kiss and leaning his forehead against yours.
Instead of replying, you pulled him into another kiss, letting his hands wander all over your body, his self control leaving his body. He knew he had you now, and he knew he wouldn’t be letting go, especially after the little whimpers leaving your mouth the second he started kissing your neck after leaving your lips all swollen.
You were too sensitive, too forgiving.
Rubbing your thighs together didn’t help either, but the second he squeezed your bare thigh, you knew you were gone. It was the ideal place for you both to be doing this, but stopping wasn’t an option, not when he was so passionately marking you just after you told him you rejected the other boy.
Spreading your legs was easy, asking you to be a good girl and keep your voices at bay was even easier for Jay, and you obliged, your eyes rolling back as he lapped at your cunt, licking big stripes while fucking your cunt with his fingers, trying to be gentle but you were too pent up to ask him to go slower, only urging him to move faster.
That’s how you spent your night, he took you to his chamber, kicking everyone out shamelessly to fuck you into the mattress, his cock not having enough of you and your pussy clenching him, trying to hold him in for as long as you could before you both reached your high.
He knew he fucked up before but now that he actually had you in his arms, he knew he was going to cherish you forever.
Tumblr media
Ravenclaw!Jake x Gryffindor!reader
Trope: Yule ball, fake dating
Jake was loved by everyone and he basked in the warmth of it. Being good in academics came naturally to him, he was a Ravenclaw after all. Adding to it, he was selected to represent Hogwarts at the triwizard championship, his fame and name more glorious than ever these days.
The problem? He had everyone’s attention but the girl who he claimed to have a tiny crush on.
He wanted to ask her to be his date for the Yule ball, however, the chances were slim as another Gryffindor boy named Heeseung, asked her right before Jake could even call out her name.
Jake wasn’t the only one suffering. You stood there beside him, watching the scene unfold with the same wrath in your eyes.
You wanted to go to the ball with Heeseung.
“Tough luck?” Jake asked, not sparing you a glance as you both watched him from a distance as they hugged gleefully.
“Talk about yourself, champ,” you crossed your arms, “she didn’t even think twice before saying yes,” you commented, jaw clenching, “she’s gonna get her heart broken, he’s gonna turn her into a situationship too.”
“What? We have to warn her,” Jake spoke, eyes widening.
“Oh, I tried, but she actually really likes Heeseung,” you huffed, “and here I thought I meant something to him.”
“Go with me,” Jake breathed out, finally looking your way, taking your beauty in.
“What?” You exclaimed, turning your head to look his way too.
He was beautiful, there’s no denying him. His hair was a bit on the messier side, lips pink and swollen from biting (he was nervous), and eyes full of hope.
“To make Heeseung jealous, of course!” He defended his statement and your eyes widened in understanding.
“Oh,” you let out, “so we’re doing all this fake dating thing, now?” You teased him, loving how his cheeks got redder but he only stepped closer, shrugging.
“We’ll have fun, you’ll get to be with the triwizard champion, it’s a win-win for you,” he offered, smirking and you smiled humorously.
“Sure,” you agreed, not paying attention to Heeseung who witnessed this interaction of yours.
It was easy to keep up with him, the rumours of you two being together spread like wildfire, especially with the Yule ball coming up, which only favoured you, granted that Heeseung had tried to approach you several times but Jake hadn’t left your side at all.
In fact, you were scared how easy it was to be in his company, “she wanted me to teach her how to ride the broom,” Jake had told you once, and he was one heck of a flyer, despite him not being in the team.
Naturally, you offered him to teach you that instead, watching how his eyes lit up and he nodded. Something about Jake was endearing to you—like how he helped you ride the broom with him sitting behind you. It felt real, too romantic the way he held on to you, smiling as he pointed out the various spots you could see from the height.
And you knew he felt it too, his heart pumping out of his chest as you rested your back against him.
It felt too real to him when you got him a tie that matched the colour of your dress, asking him to match with you, and he realized he had stopped thinking about the other girl completely as he helped you around with studies and you helped him feel alive.
Somewhere along the lines, you had forgotten that it was all fake, simply because it felt real to the both of you. The hand holding, the snuggling closer, the soft smiles on your faces, none of it was fake.
It didn’t hit you till you were on your way to meet Jake, only to find the other girl already talking to him in a corner, your jaw clenched at the sight of them talking about something you couldn’t make out from this distance. Your mind wasn’t sane as you stepped back and rushed to your own room, wondering if they had gotten together.
You knew it could very well be a misunderstanding, yet you didn’t do anything about it, especially when Jake didn’t come to meet you at all today.
You were slightly heartbroken as you woke up the next day, everyone seemed happy to the point they couldn’t stop talking about the Yule ball tonight, doing their hair and skincare already and you tried to join them, knowing that you can’t run away from it no matter what the situation would be.
Now, clad in your gown, you most certainly did feel better, looking in the mirror to find the prettiest version of yourself, you felt beautiful as you walked down the stairs, smiling gently when you found Jake waiting for you by the stairs.
His breathing hitched the second he saw you, eyes twinkling as he took you in, heart beating faster when you stood in front of him. It was magical how he took your hand, kissing your knuckles gently, “you look beautiful,” he whispered, your face heating up at the compliment.
So, you postponed asking him about the other girl, focusing solely on him as you were called for the first dance with Jake—the Hogwarts champion. He treated you well, he looked like the prettiest man alive, pulling you closer and dancing with you like he meant it when the rock band came out, but after a while, you stopped, pulling him out when he got you drinks to talk by some secluded area—a classroom nearby.
“I saw you guys talking,” you told him, admitting how you would be okay if he leaves you now and he how doesn’t need to put up this act anymore, making his heart lurch, “fuck—no! I asked her to stay away because,” he gulped as he met your eyes, “because I like you, not her.”
Everything felt rushed after, his lips on yours, your fingers in his hair, bodies pressed against one another as he messed up your lipstick, “I like you so much,” he kept mumbling between the kisses, lips trailing down to mark your neck.
He knew what he had to do—kiss every inch of you till you understood the depth of his words. He wants you so genuinely it makes your heart beat faster, his eyes full of earnestness as he comes up to kiss you again, but more than that, he wants to taste you, give you the pleasure you deserve.
Getting down on his knees was easy for him, getting under your gown even easier. You breathed in deeply when you felt him burying his nose in your pussy, pushing your panties aside to lick a stripe of your cunt, leaving a small kiss on your clit right after.
His movements were slow and calm, his hold on your thighs tight as he devoured you, seeming as if he’d be hungry for ages. You could have sworn you never felt this way before, gripping the table you were leaning against tightly, you tried your best not to fall down with how your knees were getting weaker by the second as his tongue was pushing around much faster than before.
“Jake—” you gasped, seeing stars as you finally came undone, your whole body felt as if it was on fire but Jake was just getting started with you.
Getting out, he looked more disheveled than ever, taking your hand and making you feel his hardened cock, “see what you do to me, baby,” he whispered, pulling you into another kiss, unzipping your dress as you cried about how much you need him.
Soon, your dress was on the ground and his body was connected with yours in a slow rhythm, full of lazy kisses and smiles, your face hidden in his neck as you bit him to conceal your moans when he hit that one spot which had your whole body weak.
You looked so beautiful, it made him lose his control, the sight itself had him twitching with the need to fill you up.
When you kissed him again, he finally let go, loving each second of it, knowing that you were truly his now.
Tumblr media
Gryffindor!Sunghoon x Slytherin!reader
Trope: quidditch players, enemies to fwb
“Gryffindor! Gryffindor! Gryffindor!”
“Slytherin! Slytherin! Slytherin!”
The chants were loud, the crowd going wild at the sight of you and Sunghoon circling around each other before the game—something you always did as a challenge. It most certainly didn’t help that you were on par with each other, both chasers for your respective houses.
Watching you guys bicker was something everyone enjoyed, especially when it was about your houses and their reputations.
“You better watch out, Park,” you smirked, taking your position, “Slytherin is taking the win today,” you sang, watching his smirk grow.
“In your dreams, darling,” he whispered, winking at your right as the whistle blew.
The chants were loud and so was your motivation as you grabbed the Quaffle, successfully throwing it in one of the hoops as the crowd cheered. Watching Sunghoon scowl was a sweet treat, especially when you winked at him, passing by with the quaffle again.
The game continued for a while, your house leading by thirty points, much to Sunghoon’s dismay. You were having more fun teasing him rather than playing the actual game.
However, the second the snitch was caught by your seeker, Sunghoon got hit by a bludger, falling off his broom. You should have been celebrating his downfall (pun intended) yet you couldn’t help but worry, eyeing his figure while your team celebrated their win.
It was out of character for you to visit him in the hospital wing, but you did it, showing up with the pudding he liked—and you had no clue why you knew it. He was surprised to see it, looking away with a scoff, “why are you here, huh? To boast about your win?” He asked.
You rolled your eyes, “I came here to see if you were doing well but seeing as you can still work that mouth of yours, I’ll just assume it’s alright,” you huffed, leaving the pudding behind. Sunghoon gulped, watching you leave the hospital wing with a huff before eyeing the pudding and eating it, a sudden warmth spreading in his chest.
The bickering worsened since that day, because you had to overcome the fact that you showed care to him, your friends telling you to fuck the sexual tension out—which you won’t do even in your wildest dreams.
Sunghoon was just as furious cause he couldn’t stop thinking about you showing up at the hospital wing just to visit him, his taunts and that smirk annoying you more than ever now, you just wanted to punch him, or shut him up. It didn’t help that he looked awfully attractive with that smirk of his.
Fighting even during the dinner time was getting on everyone’s nerves, to the point you had to go to detention for pulling pranks on each other.
To diffuse this tension, he met you before the next quidditch match you had against him, “oh, ready to have your ass beat, Park?” You asked him with a mock smile.
“We’ll see who gets their ass beat, darling,” he spoke, invading your personal space by whispering in your ear, “let’s make a bet, if I win then I get to fuck you tonight.”
“What the fuck, Park?” You asked, eyes widened.
“You want it too, baby.” He says, a lazy smirk playing on his face, “besides, I won’t bother you ever again if I lose. So, do we have a deal?”
The deal was too tempting, and you weren’t sure if it was because of the fact that you’ll, (1) either be ignored by him or (2) have sex with him.
You grabbed his hand, shaking it with no aim whatsoever, you felt too lost but also determined to put up a good game.
However your mind was busy imagining his lips on yours, the smirk still present on his face, and that’s how you barely put the Quaffle in through the hoops while Sunghoon played with more energy than ever, awfully determined to win the match—win you.
The verdict? He won.
And as lost as you felt, you weren’t sad about it, in fact you were staring at Hoon who was celebrating, his eyes still on yours with that stupid smirk on his face which clearly said: you’re mine for the night.
Being in his room was crazy, the fact that he had successfully pushed out all his roomies was even crazier.
“Not fighting back anymore, kitten?” He raised his brows, his features looking sharper up close now that he had you under him, his weight on you barely giving you any space to move, his scent only driving you crazier.
“You’re the one who gave up, Park,” you finally whispered, pulling him closer by the collar with your usual expression full of mock, your finger tracing his jawline, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down, “you proposed the idea of fucking me—been thinking about me then?”
His fingers traced the curve of your neck, trailing down till he settled on grabbing your waist, “what if I have? What if I wanna see you shut the fuck up when I make you cry on my cock?”
“I’d like to see you try,” you chuckled, pushing your knee up to caress against his crotch, making him hiss.
It didn’t take him any longer to practically rip off your robes, attaching his mouth to your nipples, flicking them with his tongue as he cupped your cunt as a warning to shut your mouth, but you couldn’t let him win, opening your mouth to mock him again, only to have his tongue shoved down your throat, his fingers kneading your flesh, rubbing your wetness with all his strength to have you whimpering under him.
“I hate you so much, Park,” you mumbled, breathless.
“Feeling’s mutual, kitten,” he groaned right beside your ear, finger fucking you now as his thumb worked your clit roughly, yet giving you the kind of pleasure you never thought you’d receive.
You feel hot as the guy you hate makes you moan uncontrollably, stopping right before you were about to reach your high with his same stupidly attractive smirk when you whined out of desperation.
“What’s the hurry, kitten? We’ve got all night.”
Tumblr media
© jaylaxies | tumblr
2K notes · View notes
atrirose · 4 months
Note
ahhhh can u do the trend where you call them your husband?? plsss <3
𝜗𝜚 DEAR HUSBAND
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
ft. enha hyung line ✷ fluff wc. 0.3k warning.none © atrirose tiktok m.list
Tumblr media
HEESEUNG : "nothing I'm just with my husband, yeah okay i will call you later" looks at you with big doe eyes, did you just called him husband really, his face was filled with warmth "your husband? really you mean it" looks at you anticipation "yeah who else would be my husband" gives you his hands "okay put a ring on it" you burst into laughter at his cuteness "you want me to purpose to you hee" bambi eyes stared at you with excitment "yes, call me hubby yn" kisses you softly "hubby" giggles arupts from him.
JAY : "can i get a coke with that oh and my husband would like a strawberry leomenade with extra ice" jay was scrolling through his phone but as soon as he heard husband , you swear you have never seen him turn so fast "husband? me" points at himself with wide eyes "yeah you" you said with smile "yeah bro you heard that, would you like to come to our wedding" he asked the person taking your order "JAY YOU DON'T KNOW HIM" "AND THE POINT? WE ARE GETTING MARRIED, oh wait let me tell my dad" and you just sat there with red face as he went on and on about the wedding
JAKE : "yeah that will be all, babe what do you want" jake looks at you while snuggling with layal "can i have chicken wings please" you nod in response "and my husband would like to have chicken wings" he was shocked but that was only for a spilt second "yes and please give us newly married discount please" screams loud so the persons taking order hears "babe calm down what would you like to drink" he looks at you with puppy eyes "a coke please" you went on ordering "and he would-" doesnt lets you finish "who he? who is he? am your husband, wifey" at this point even layla is concerned about him "my wifey", so mainly he was very loud and then called your mom spilling all the tea looking all proud, he is the favorite child try hard yn
SUNGHOON : "can you call me, my phone is lost" dials you number "oho my heart huh? hoon so cringey" you said pulling his cheeks "shut up yn" he saw your phone buzz under the table "there i will bring it" as soon as he saw the contact name with a heart and written husband he couldn't help but bouce "babe whats this" he shows the phone with giggles "you are my husband hoon" bounce pt2 "wait you meant to write it, like you saved this right, did you misspell it" — "how can i misspell it, and yeah of course i mean it" hugs you tight pressing kisses on your head "okay lets get married soon"
1K notes · View notes
gimmeurtmi · 1 year
Text
no nut november — han (loser #1)
pairing: han jisung x fem!reader
tags: no nut november mini series, established relationship, ot8 inclusive, smut!!!🔞
warnings: swearing, open conversations about sex as an impulse/need, insecure reader for a bit, fingering, oral ( f + m receiving), slight dirty talk, unprotected sex, no nut november as a bet, needy!jisung,
inspo: kaili’s brain <33
notes: @sluttywonwoo and i are finally collabing after like five years :’). i’m so so hyped for this one!!! make sure to tell us what you think and place your bets on the winner🥰 😉
banner by @sluttywonwoo
{ wc: 5246 }
Tumblr media
jisung and his friends were close. very close. they saw each other practically every day and would share everything with each other. it was something he cherished deeply, and he loved just how jisung he could be around them.
they never made him feel like he was too much—unlike most of the people he grew up with, and they even indulged him when he’d start talking about his niche interests or when he shared a new song he wrote. they were always supportive.
maybe to a fault.
“so, even though we can’t grow facial hair,” chan concluded, “i think it would be nice if we could at least make a donation to the charity.”
“what charity?” seungmin asked.
“weren’t you listening?” changbin yelled.
“no,” the younger said easily.
“hyung was explaining to us about movember,” felix recaps. seungmin just shrugs.
“i could grow facial hair if i tried,” he challenges.
“that’s not the point!” chan shakes his head. “will you guys make a donation with me or not?”
they all mumbled their affirmations.
“why is it in november?” jeongin quips.
chan just shrugs. “every months has things attached to it, i suppose.”
“november has another thing,” minho says, plainly.
“there’s national cappuccino day,” seungmin agrees with a nod.
“and fried chicken day!” changbin adds.
“yeah, and there’s a challenge to write a whole novel in the month of november,” hyunjin says softly.
“yeah,” jisung says, tone serious as he leans forward, “you’re forgetting the most important one. no nut november.”
minho smirks at him as the pair of friends exchange a look that says ‘you read my mind’.
“yeah, right,” chan chuckles, “the other ones sound like real things though.”
“it’s a real thing!” jisung defends.
“no, it’s not,” chan just shakes his head.
“it is!”
“do you know anyone who actually does it rather than posting stupid memes about it?”
“me,” jisung shrugs confidently.
the room fills with a chorus of laughter so loud, jisung sits there with a shocked face at the reaction he just got.
well, fine, he doesn’t do it. he’s never done it. he’s never even thought about it. but chan doesn’t need to know that, does he?
“why?” jisung said once the laughter calmed down, a few minutes after he last spoke.
“you’re trying to say you’re not going to have sex or do anything for a whole month?” seungmin tried to clarify.
“yeah, why?”
“it’s just…” he holds back his laughter, “…i don’t think you’re capable of that.”
“hey!” jisung exclaims. “i’m not an animal, i can go a month without sex.”
“oh, we all know that,” hyunjin laughs, “we’ve seen you go through a year long dry spell before you found y/n. but you got off every fucking day.”
“uh—i don’t—why do you know that?” jisung could feel himself blushing.
“we share a wall.”
the boys laugh harder. jisung can’t stop himself from cringing.
“hyunjin, please never say that again,” he tries to brush off.
“maybe you can not have sex for a whole month,” minho chuckles, “but you can’t go that long with nothing.”
“it’s not that hard!” jisung insists, unable to accept the fact his friends think so little of him and his self control.
“it is!” chan adds, “we’re used to doing stuff like that all the time, we can’t just stop.”
“yeah,” changbin agrees, leaning forward to give jisung the kind of look he gives him when he’s trying to encourage him. “none of us could do that.”
“hey!” felix quips up, just as seungmin puts his hand up.
“speak for yourself!” the younger adds.
“yeah!” jeongin nods firmly.
“you guys think you could go a whole month?” chan raises an eyebrow at his friends.
“i could, too,” hyunjin shrugs plainly.
“first of all, this isn’t fair,” minho leans closer, as if evaluating the situation. “innie is single. he’s used to not getting any,”
“—hey!—“
“—and most of you have girlfriends so you can’t just decide to do this without telling them.”
“most of us?” changbin quotes back at minho, “like you don’t have a girlfriend?”
“she’s just as competitive as i am, so she’ll do it just to show you guys we’re the best.”
“the best at not getting any?” jisung quips with a raise of his brow. the boys snicker.
“yah!” minho exclaims. “don’t start with me!”
“maybe minho is so confident because she never lets him get it anyway,” seungmin laughs.
“you think i can’t get some?” minho squares up, acting as if he’s about to take out his phone and prove his friends wrong.
“uh,” chan tries, hands up, “i think we’re getting off track here?”
“let’s put money on it,” jisung offers. he’s joking, well, kinda.
now that the boys have all doubted him, while simultaneously agreeing they’d be better than him at something, he has to prove them wrong. even if it is only trivial and honestly pretty stupid. jisung is never not the best.
“how much?” felix rubs his hands together.
“enough for the winner to get a nice weekend away with his partner,” hyunjin suggests, “minho’s got a point. they’ll have to go through it too so might as well treat them.”
“and what does innie get?” seungmin can’t help but ask.
“i’m single, too,” changbin croaks.
“you’re not,” chan rolls his eyes. “being too scared to establish the relationship doesn’t make you single.”
changbin smiles sheepishly at the raised brows around him, trying to ignore the pointed looks his friends are giving him.
“yeah, when are you going to just ask her to be your girlfriend? we’ve all met her already and we love her,” felix encourages with a soft smile.
“why is this about me?” he yells back. “tell jeongin to get his shit together and ask his crush out!”
“that can be his prize. a getaway that’s the perfect excuse to ask her out,” chan offers with a smile.
“so, agreed? no sex for a month and winner gets a weekend away with their lover, undefined partner, or unrequited crush, as a prize,” minho concludes.
“it’s not just sex,” felix points out, “no, uh, fireworks at all.”
“it’s called orgasms, yongbok,” seungmin says bluntly.
“fine,” he rolls his eyes, his cheeks dusted pink, “no orgasms.”
“we should exclude jisung from this,” hyunjin smirks, “since he was gonna do it anyway.”
“poor y/n,” seungmin tsks, “at least our girlfriends will get something nice for this torture.”
“hey hey hey!” jisung lets out quickly, barely breathing as he goes on, “if anything as your inspiration and true role model i should be part of this bet, too. and i’ll have you know i take amazing care of my girlfriend whether i sleep with her or not and no, sleeping with me is not it’s own kind of torture,” he says quickly, before seungmin and minho can say what’s so clearly on their minds.
they both let out a disappointed grunt at his words—confirming jisung knows them far too well.
“but we have to tell them we’re doing this,” chan confirms, “i don’t keep stuff from her and like minho said, it’s just cruel not to tell them.”
they all agree.
jeongin curls in on himself ever so slightly, before he says, “maybe just hyungs should do this, then. i don’t have a girlfriend so it’s an unfair advantage.”
“as the youngest your hormones are most active, so if anything it’ll be harder for you,” hyunjin says, comforting his friend.
what a weird way to comfort someone, jisung thinks. and then he says it out loud.
“it was actually very comforting, thank you,” jeongin glared at jisung, “but it’s fine. i don’t have to be part of the bet. i’d have no one to take to the getaway either.”
“don’t worry,” minho says quickly, “you’re playing. we’re not letting you sit this out just because you haven’t had the chance to make a move on that girl.”
“but—“
“—the more of us play, the harder it is. more people you need to outlive.”
“outlive?” jisung repeats with a gulp. minho simply nods at him, his face expressionless.
“right, shake on it!” chan announces, and all eight of the boys put their hands in the middle of the circle, each grabbing at one or two people’s fingers.
november 2nd
why did jisung ever agree to this? why did he even bring it up?
this was stupid. this was so so stupid. you haven’t had the chance to come over since the month started, and well, jisung got too distracted and engulfed by your presence that he didn’t have a chance to bring the bet up just yet. he didn’t know how to say it, either.
“i bet a romantic getaway with my friends on us not having sex for a month,” felt like a stupid thing to say. well, it was stupid. stupid!
it felt borderline ridiculous when you snuggled up closer to him on the couch, back flush to his chest as you played the next movie on your scary marathon list. halloween was over, but both you and jisung agreed there were far too many good ones to just stop once the holiday was over, so jisung was happy to let you keep working through the list the pair of you curated on your letterbox account.
“you’re so warm,” you said happily, moving in closer to his embrace. jisung planted a small kiss on the back of your neck, squeezing you tighter as you sighed.
“i love being like this with you,” you mumbled, moving your head to the side enough to plant a soft kiss on his equally soft cheeks.
“squeezed to your death?” jisung teased, squeezing at your stomach and your hips, where his hands were casually wrapped around you.
you let out a dramatic huff before you giggled at him, curling a hand underneath his bicep to push his arms away from you. he only let his grip loosen, but didn’t dare move away too much. you kept your fingers around his bicep, slowly pressing into the muscle.
“ji, all the time you spend away from me at the gym really paid off,” you mumbled, leaning down to kiss at his bicep softly.
jisung smiled timidly.
“uh, thanks,” he cleared his throat.
“i feel so safe in your strong arms,” you added.
“why do scary movies always make you horny?” jisung asked.
“what?” you chuckled, “i’m not horny?”
“you are feeling me up,” he pointed out, his chin gesturing at your fingers and the way they wrapped around his muscles.
“i can’t admire the artwork?” you huffed.
“there’s admiring, and there’s drooling,” he said, eyebrows raised.
“since when are you so cocky,” you sighed.
“does that turn you on, too?” jisung smirked. he was moving into dangerous territory, but he couldn’t help it when it was you. there was something so enticing about flirting with you, especially when you were sat so snuggly in between his legs.
“for the record, everything you do is a turn on.”
jisung swallowed. it didn’t go unnoticed to him that your thighs spread ever so slightly since this exchange started, or that you were much closer to his chest than you were a few moments ago. he had to keep it clean. “focus on your film, honey.”
you two still exchanged kisses, you still fed jisung snacks in between jump scares, you still laughed at all the kills together. so, it was just like any other movie night.
except it wasn’t—for the very reason you were pointing out now.
“jisung,” you began, tilting your head to the side slightly as he sat back down on the bed. he cleaned his room from the snacks and came back quickly, but it was enough time to for you to realise what happened.
“jisung? who the fuck is jisung?” he knitted his eyebrows together. “what’s wrong?”
“are you upset with me?”
his face reminded you of a surprised cartoon character, his mouth a perfect circle as his eyebrows met his hair.
“what? no, no. why? why?”
“it’s just,” you blushed, causing jisung to grab both your hands and trail his thumbs against your wrist soothingly. “we’ve never ever had a movie night without your hands down my pants.”
jisung laughed.
“stop,” you groaned. “i’m being serious.”
“my baby! my sweet sweet baby,” he teased, getting closer and closer to your face with his signature shit eating grin.
“it’s like an instinct you have, jisung. we watch a movie and you touch me. it was really weird that you didn’t.”
“stop calling me jisung,” he scoffed, “i’m not your friend.”
“you are now, since friends usually have normal, non-pussy-touching movie nights together all the time!”
“so you didn’t get touched for one movie and i’ve been bumped back down to friend status?” jisung gasped.
“i don’t know, have i?” you counter.
jisung notices the way you don’t quite let him hold your hands, the way that gorgeous glint in your eyes isn’t there. he isn’t too sure you’re just joking about this.
“hey,” he says softly, “are you being serious?”
you nod softly. “did i do something wrong?”
“why would you think that?” jisung exclaimed, pulling you closer to him. “where is this coming from?”
“is it because i didn’t put perfume on today? i know i’ve been getting more comfortable around you, i’m sorry i haven’t put a lot of effort in today i just thought we were gonna have a chill night so i didn’t wear my best clothes and—“
“—hey! hey! stop that now,” jisung shakes his head quickly. “i love that you’re comfortable around me.”
“it’s just, i don’t know, jisung. you’re always—“
“—can you not call me that—“
“—you’re always touching me in some sort of way and then i don’t see you for a week and you’re just not anymore?”
“why are you insecure? you know i love you,” jisung emphasised with all his might, his figure slumping until he met your gaze. you wouldn’t look in his eyes.
“it’s okay if you just weren’t in the mood,” you say quickly, realising your insecurities were indeed leading your train of thought. you owed it to jisung to be understanding—even if his behaviour was painfully uncharacteristic. “i just never see you not in the mood.”
“you’re making me out to be some sort of pervert,” jisung jokes, trying to get you to laugh. or at least let him hold your hand.
“but you’re my pervert,” you pout at him, causing his insides to crunch at the sight.
you always made him weak—and he was holding everything inside him not to tease you during the movie like he always did. but it was only his first try, he couldn’t lose already. and if he touched you, jisung knew he wouldn’t wanna stop until you were both spent and satisfied. he thought so hard about that, he didn’t stop to consider how you might see it. or the fact he never fucking told you.
“i made a bet with the boys,” jisung said quickly.
“huh?”
“we’re doing no nut november so i tried not to touch you because i don’t wanna lose on the second day,” he said in one big breath.
“that was too fast, rapper boy,” you pointed out, unable to catch half the words he said.
jisung repeated himself, slowly, feeling the blush creep up his neck as he spoke clearly and carefully.
“what did you bet on?”
he felt his eyes gap again. that was your first question?
“a romantic getaway for the couple that wins.”
“and where will changbin go for his getaway, do you think?”
“what?” he gasped. “i’m taking you on a romantic getaway.”
“no, you’re not,” you laughed, amused at his incredulous face.
“what does that mean?”
“ji,” you giggled, lacing your fingers together, “i have never met anyone as insatiable as you. even if you can somehow hold off sex for a month, you really think your impatient dick will be able to stay calm for that long?”
jisung felt heat rushing all over his body, coursing through him then all the way down to his crotch.
“i’m sorry i made you feel insecure,” he tries to change the subject, ignoring just how dry his mouth felt all of a sudden, “please never doubt how much i’m obsessed with you.”
you smiled at his words, nodding in acceptance.
you lean forward, capturing his lips in a soft kiss.
jisung wanted to make it up to you, he wanted to make sure you had no doubt at all about how crazy he was about you—he wanted you to know this was just about the bet.
so he wrapped an arm around your shoulder and pulled your body closer to him, deepening the kiss as you sighed contently.
he ran a hand down your back, slowly, cupping your ass softly as he felt you smiling against his lips.
“so obsessed with you,” he mumbles into the kiss, “so obsessed.”
“i’m obsessed with you too,” you sigh, unable to quite finish your sentence before jisung slips his tongue past your lips.
the kiss is still soft, jisung’s tongue moving slowly against yours, but his movements are more urgent as he grabs your hips and pulls you onto his lap.
“my perfect, perfect girlfriend,” he sighs, kissing down your jaw.
jisung wants you. he wants you really bad. and he can have you. why not? the rule is, as felix put it, no fireworks. jisung is not the kind of man that can only have sex if he cums. he can just focus on you. he’ll just take care of you. that’s allowed.
“can i make it up to you?” he asks, eyes looking up at you as he moves your hair away from your face.
“how?” you cock your head to the side.
“i’ll touch you now, give you what you so clearly missed out on,” he chuckled.
you nodded instantly, biting your lip.
“you sure you can?” you ask, no hint of teasing in your words. you know how competitive jisung is, and you also know he really doesn’t have much self control. you wouldn’t want him to lose just because you were feeling a little insecure lately.
“yeah,” he nods. confidently.
you lean down to kiss him again.
jisung doesn’t waste any time pulling your sweats down your legs and helping you shimmy out of them. he slowly presses you down onto your back, pushing at each knee to keep your legs open for him.
he trailed his finger up your thighs, slowly, smirking at the way your eyes fluttered at his action. he’s still jisung, so he’s still a fucking tease, and he circled your lips once and twice, bringing his finger in between your folds casually.
before you think to protest, he dips the tip of his finger inside you, his eyes gleaming at the squelching noise. it’s only the tip of his index finger, but it’s enough to make you want more—so you buck your hips up in a silent request.
jisung leaned forward, pressing a kiss to your hipbone.
“don’t get needy,” he warned, “you know we shouldn’t be going crazy.”
you nod, taking in a deep breath as you focus on the feeling your boyfriend is giving you right now. you know you shouldn’t be greedy.
jisung is spread out in front of you, his whole body on the bed—face in front of your exposed pussy.
he leans his head against your thigh, kissing at the soft skin as his eyes fixate on his fingers—slowly, shallowly, going in and out.
“faster,” you dare.
jisung obeyed instantly, the tip of his finger tapping in and out of your entrance in quick shallow motions.
“ji, fuck baby,” you start chanting, breathing fast as the pleasure starts to consume you.
“more?” jisung raises his eyebrows at you, his smile big and cheeky as a sense of pride follows his movements.
“please, please more,” you pleaded.
jisung climbed up your body as he kissed around your collarbone, planting kiss after kiss after kiss before he pulled your shirt down enough to expose your bare chest.
“no bra?” he gasps.
“i said i was more comfortable around you,” you shrugged.
“fuck, baby,” he chuckled, “be as comfortable as you want.”
he grabbed your tit, kneading the skin before he rolled your nipple in between his fingers—a loud moan escaping you. jisung leaned down, sucking the sensitive bud as you grabbed onto his soft hair.
“ji,” you moaned, “fuck, please. please.”
“what?” he asked, almost genuinely. he knew you quite well at this point and he was doing everything you taught him you liked. what was he missing?
“want you,” you sighed.
“i’m here,” he smirked up at you, kissing your lips softly before turning his attention back to your nipples—tongue moving fast against it.
“can you, uh, would it be okay if you—“ you stuttered, unsure exactly how to ask for what you wanted. usually you just told jisung to fuck you, but you didn’t want to ask that now. still, you weren’t quite sure how to word your next request.
“what is it, baby?”
“can you use your mouth?” you blushed. but jisung didn’t even stop to tease you about it—and instead buried his face in between your thighs without a second to spare.
you squealed at the coolness of his tongue, taken aback by just how fast he was going from the start.
jisung was good at a lot of things—but you didn’t think anyone could possibly be so good at giving head. he proved just how good he was at it every chance he got, and now, he was determined to prove that point one more time.
your fingers carded in his hair, pulling at the strands as he placed his tongue flat against your clit—moving it in a pulsing pattern against the sensitive bud.
you’ve never been with anyone who ate pussy like him.
you weren’t even sure what you were saying, too lost in the feeling to realise you were chanting your boyfriend’s name like a prayer, mixed in with a few swear words and some questionable noises.
but it was driving jisung insane.
he loved knowing he was making you feel good, he loved the compliments that tumbled out of your mouth without you even realising it, he loved how you always said how good he was when he made you cum.
he couldn’t remember the last time you were this loud for him.
as you tugged on his hair again, pulling him even closer to your cunt, jisung grunted. he was rolling his hips into the mattress.
“fuck baby,” he pulled away slightly, catching his breath for a moment, “i’m gonna lose my fucking mind soon.”
he kept rutting into the mattress as he sucked on your clit, moaning against your body and causing another set of swear words to leave your lips.
“such a filthy fucking mouth,” he let out, his eyes hooded slightly as he looked up at you, his hips still rolling against the mattress. “how does someone so pretty sound so dirty?”
“ji,” you whimpered, “ji, your mouth is so good.”
“yeah,” he sighed before getting back to his task.
after a few moments, both of you rolling your hips in search of more friction, you started to whine.
“i’m close, i’m so close,” you said softly.
jisung knew you needed more to be able to cum, and although he could’ve just used his fingers—he was desperate for more, too.
so he climbed up your body and rolled his sweats down his thighs.
“what are you doing?” you asked quickly.
“just let me feel how warm you are,” he all but sobbed, “just for a little bit.”
“are you sure?” you checked, glancing down at his dick. he was swollen, hard, and the tip glistened with precum. you weren’t sure he would stop after a little bit, especially considering he was practically humping the bed until now.
“wanna feel how warm you are baby,” he repeated, kissing your neck, “please. i’ll stop if i get too close.”
you nodded at him. it was all you wanted too, to feel the stretch of his cock inside you, but you could tell jisung wasn’t thinking clearly as soon as you noticed just how blown his pupils were.
either way—how could you care about the stupid bet he made with his friends when the prettiest boy in the world was begging to put his cock inside you?
jisung lined himself up easily, his strong hands on either side of your shoulders before he pushed himself all the way inside you.
the pair of you groaned in unison.
“so fucking tight,” he sighed, “so wet.”
“it’s from how good you are at eating me out,” you moaned, grabbing onto his shoulders as you pulled him closer.
“can i move?” he asked, his nose bumping against your chin before he kissed you sloppily.
“it’s up to you, baby,” you nodded.
jisung thrust up into you. hard.
you yelped.
“more,” you couldn’t help but ask.
jisung repeated his actions, once and then twice, and then he was rubbing your clit fast.
“oh my god,” you moaned, “don’t stop, don’t stop, don’t stop.”
jisung wouldn’t dream of stopping, not when you looked so good underneath him, moaning and grunting and biting your lip in pleasure.
he was focusing as best he could on thinking about literally anything else to push his own high as far away as he could.
he could do it. he could make you cum on his cock without losing. he knew he could do it.
and soon, your moans were getting high pitched and longer and then—
“i’m cumming!” you announced breathily, and jisung shut his eyes. it was one thing feeling you clench and pulse around him while keeping his focus, but he couldn’t possibly look at your blissed out face right now. he needed to focus.
once he felt you calm down, heard that little sigh you let out as soon as you relax, he knew it was safe to open his eyes.
“ji,” you chuckled, “that was fucking amazing.”
you kiss him, hand cradling his cheeks as you pepper more kisses around his face.
“happy to be of service,” he smirked at you. pride coated his shoulders as he kissed your cheek.
he actually fucking did it.
he took a moment to appreciate your expression, the sweat on your forehead, the way you were still taking in big breaths, your messy hair.
“fuck, i’m so lucky,” he let out. you chuckled in response.
“can i—would you be okay if i did the thing?” you asked, shyly.
only recently did the pair of you discover you both loved tasting your own release on each other. jisung would eat you out almost every time he came inside you, and you loved sucking him off after he fucked you. it wasn’t like you had to do it—but since this discovery, your aftercare reached a new level of hot.
“sure,” jisung nodded, laying down on the bed beside you after he slowly pulled out.
“tell me if i need to stop,” you said before kissing his lips.
“don’t worry, honey,” he smiled, “i got this.”
you nodded before sliding down his body.
you licked his tip softly, testing the waters, and hummed at the taste. the saltiness and your own taste combined together as you took more and more of his dick into your mouth.
you licked the shiny part of his thighs where a bit got away, sucking a small bruise into the skin. and then you licked his balls, and then you took all of him inside you.
jisung was quiet the whole time, his face scrunched in concentration. he wouldn’t even look at you.
“baby, you’re okay?” you asked, rubbing his thigh soothingly as you licked his tip slowly—still tasting yourself on his warm dick.
“yeah, baby, all good,” he grunted as he shut his eyes.
you took that as a sign you could keep going, and tried your hardest not to tease him too much. you just wanted to clean him off.
“there we go, my love,” you hummed, “all done.”
jisung opened his eyes with a smile, bringing a hand into your hair.
“thanks, baby,” he smiled, visibly relaxing in front of you.
“you did so well, ji,” you smiled, “so patient and calm for me. you’re gonna win this for us.”
you gleamed up at him, a big smile on your lips, and instinctively you found yourself bringing your hand around him as you stroked him twice.
“wait, wait, wait,” he said frantically—waving his hands at you.
but before you could question that kind of reaction, or even respond, his thighs had contracted in front of you as cum shot onto his stomach.
it was too late now, so you made sure he at least enjoyed it, stroking him in a pace you knew he liked as you watched the pleasure sink into his body.
“fuck!” he let out as he came down his high. “two fucking days?”
“i don’t understand what just happened,” you chuckled, sitting up. “was it something i said?”
“i shouldn’t have looked at you,” jisung groaned, bringing his hands up to rub his face. “your stupid cute smile.”
“really?” you giggled, “you could fuck me through an orgasm but me smiling at you was the last straw?”
“you know what,” jisung chuckled, grabbing the pillow next to him and launching it at you, “i wish you would bump me down to friend status.”
“you don’t mean that, jisung,” you smirked, reaching over to his bedside table for some tissues. you helped him clean up his now ruined shirt as the pair of you laughed.
jisung leaned up to kiss you, pulling you closer by the back of your neck.
“don’t call me that,” he whined as you pulled away.
“so like, i’m not allowed to call you by your legal name, i can’t smile at you, anything else?”
jisung rolled his eyes at you with a grin, leaning up to kiss you—tasting everything you cleaned up on your lips.
“two fucking days,” he mumbled again as he pulled away.
“get over it, ji,” you chuckled.
jisung huffed at himself, running a hand through his hair before he pulled his shirt off, letting you cuddle into him as the pair of you sighed into each other’s embrace.
his phone buzzed at that—pulling you away from your momentary post sex bliss as jisung read over the text.
minho: so how is movie night going? 😌
jisung: fuck you
“don’t worry, baby,” you said as you giggled at the texts on his screen, “the boys will never find out it was only two days.”
jisung grumbled at that.
“minho is a dick. and we all know he’s gonna win it, too.”
“sure, sure,” you patted his chest, thinking did it really matter that much? “i’m sure whoever wins will use their gift wisely.”
“oh wait, shit,” he exclaimed. you looked up at him curiously. “we were all busy the week of his birthday so chan said i need to plan a party for next week. will you help me?”
“of course, jisung,” you pressed a kiss to his lips.
“stop calling me that!” he chuckled, eyes wide as he shook you around by your shoulders.
you decided kissing him would calm him down, and it did—the pair of you kissing until you were both too tired to go on.
6K notes · View notes
minastras · 1 year
Text
dear stranger, do you remember me too? // sunghoon
Tumblr media
When you were sixteen, you betrayed Park Sunghoon. Or he betrayed you. Whichever it was, you knew two things for sure: 1) kids were cruel, and 2) you would spend the rest of your life trying to make up your mind. Well, until you saw him again. It was a strange feeling, meeting him in the flesh even though his ghost had been haunting you for three years.
at a glance: childhood friends to strangers to lovers, reformed bad boy! sunghoon, university au, pure angst (i received High Level Clearance from @end-hyphen to put him through the wringer sorry), ft. hyung line
words: 12.3k
warnings: swearing, mild mentions of blood, sexual harassment, and fights (nothing serious), alcohol and cigarette use
——————————
For as long as you could remember, Park Sunghoon had been the centre of your solar system, the axis around which your universe revolved. You’d known him since the day you were born. You lived on the same street, four houses apart, and as the only two kids in the area you naturally bonded instantly with each other. He was your best friend, your confidant, your partner in crime.
As soon as you both were no taller than his coffee table, you spent nearly every day together at the playground behind your street, running through the neighbourhood blowing bubbles and chasing butterflies.
“Do you think we could both fit on the same swing?” You could still hear your voice, light and flowery back then, asking.
“Let’s find out,” his equally childish voice rang back, before he yanked you into his lap and struggled to get enough leverage with his feet to push you both off the ground.
That ended with you tumbling out of the swing and onto the tarmac just by the playground, scraping your knee. You both must’ve been only five years old then, but you didn’t cry, instead stubbornly getting to your feet and ignoring the blood trickling down your calf until you were back in the privacy of your living room.
He had carried you home on his back, even though you could walk just fine, and sat you down on the sofa while he cleaned your broken skin with a tissue.
“You can cry if you want,” he had said simply, in that innocent manner only kids have.
You were with him all the way through kindergarten to middle school to high school. Neither of you had many friends; you were both quiet and shy and somewhat rough around the edges. But that didn’t matter, because you had each other.
As you grew from toddlers to precocious children to teenagers, you continued spending nearly every day together. When you weren’t glued to each other’s sides in school, he was spending the night at your house after class, or you were playing video games in his room on weekends.
You always looked forward to Fridays. Sunghoon finished school an hour after you did and he would wait for you in an empty classroom. Afterwards you would take the bus into town and waste away the rest of the afternoon at the movies or in the arcade. You’d buy fried chicken for dinner and eat in your room, and he would spend the night. In the summertime, you’d climb up to the roof and stargaze and eventually fall asleep beside him, only to be rudely awakened by middle-of-the-night summer showers.
You had never known anything else but you and Sunghoon against the world.
——————————
When you were sixteen, things began to change.
“Do you want to do something special tonight?” Sunghoon asked. You were hanging out in your bedroom, him lying on your bed and you sitting on a bean bag on the floor, listening to music and studying.
“Like what?”
He grinned excitedly and handed you his phone.  “Jeongmin invited me to join him and his friends. He asked me to bring you, too.”
You read the brief text exchange and frowned. “Jeongmin? As in, iljin and leader of that gang of dickheads, Jeongmin?”
“He’s actually nicer than he seems, you know,” Sunghoon told you. “He said he wants us all to hang out.”
You gave him his phone back, incredulous. “Hoon, the four of them beat up Ahn Jinho so badly last month that he’s still in hospital. You can’t seriously be considering taking him up on his offer. He’s going to drag us out into a park and kill us.”
“I think he just wants to show us how to have fun. You know, live a little. Why else would he invite two nerd loners like us?” he asked.
“Because we’re weak, lonely, and easy to take advantage of?” you pointed out. When he didn’t respond, you sighed. “Do you really want to go?”
“I do.”
“Fine.”
He shook his head rapidly. “You don’t have to come if you don’t want to.”
“And let you get killed all by yourself? No thanks. We die together.”
——————————
You knew it was a mistake the second the conversation ended, but, as you said, you weren’t very well going to let Sunghoon go alone. And he was adamant, longing for friends, and desperate for an adventure. He clung to your arm as you walked from your house to the abandoned car park, thanking you repeatedly the entire journey.
Regret set in almost instantly. For you, anyway. Sunghoon seemed to be having a blast.
Jeongmin was already there waiting for you, with a case of cheap alcohol in his hand and his three lackeys in tow. You sat in the car park watching as Sunghoon drank and smoked with them, pretending to enjoy himself even though you knew he despised the taste of both of those things.
Jeongmin respected your assertion that you wouldn’t smoke (a shocker), but continued pushing you to drink the entire night. You fidgeted under his leering gaze, only growing more anxious as the minutes ticked by and he kept trying to ply you with alcohol, kept sitting closer and closer to you, kept returning his hand to your thigh no matter how many times you shifted away. Sunghoon didn’t stop him.
At the end of the night, you dragged Sunghoon back to your house and managed to get him up to your room without waking up your dad. He was wasted and reeked of smoke, incredibly lucky that his parents would just assume he’d spent the night at yours like always. You dumped him on your bed, aired out his clothes, and mixed honey and lemon juice into a glass of warm water for him to try and stop his cough.
“Did you have fun?” he asked, already changed into some of his sleeping clothes he kept in your room. His words were slurred and his cheeks were red, but he was coherent enough. “God, my throat feels like shit.”
“Because you smoked half a pack in one sitting like you were cosplaying as a forty-five year old weathered truck driver. Drink your honey lemon water,” you ordered, opening your bedroom windows so the cigarette smoke wouldn’t linger. “And no, I did not.”
He pouted but complied. “They’re not that bad.”
You took the empty glass from his hands and pulled the blankets up over him, touching his forehead. His skin was warm and flushed from the alcohol. “We’ll agree to disagree,” you said, heading downstairs to wash the glass.
“Lie down with me,” he whined the second you came back, somehow having managed to tuck himself into your bed like a sushi roll.
You switched off the lights and climbed into bed beside him, close but not touching. “I really don’t think you should be mixing with them, Hoon. They’re bad news,” you said quietly.
He’d fallen asleep before you ever got the chance to finish your sentence.
——————————
Over the next few weeks, Sunghoon started going out on more of these ‘adventures’. You stopped tagging along, but he still relied on you to shelter him in your room so his parents wouldn’t find out where he was disappearing to. And you continued to keep your phone right by your pillow while you slept so you could go bring him home if and when he called you.
He kept smoking around Jeongmin and his friends, even though he hated it and it made his throat itchy. You had started doing your own grocery shopping so your dad wouldn’t notice how fast the lemons and honey ran out nowadays.
When you and him were together, he acted exactly the same. He was still sweet, thoughtful, and just a little bit snarky. He still stuck to you in school, still waited for you every Friday afternoon, and still followed you to whichever new restaurant you wanted to try out on the weekends. He still lit up with a smile when you came by to his figure skating practice to cheer him on, much to the chagrin of his coach.
But whenever he went out to get wasted with Jeongmin and his gang and you had to go pick him up, you caught glimpses of the person he was becoming. He was picking fights and losing his temper at the smallest things, aggressive and hot-headed and dripping in machismo. No longer charmingly sarcastic with a gentle side, now he was just mean.
As soon as you two were back in your room, however, that all melted away. He would cuddle up to you, apologise, and thank you for always bringing him home no matter how ungodly the hour. If he woke up before you, he would tidy your room as a way to return the favour and leave a snack on your bedside table.
The snack was always accompanied by a yellow post-it note which he took from your desk (you didn’t even use those, but you kept them around specifically for him) with a dumb doodle or lots of hearts or both.
You weren’t happy about this development, but you didn’t do anything to stop it. It was his life, not yours. And you weren’t really in the business of speaking up about things that bothered you anyway. You kept your head down and your mouth shut, and stayed out of Jeongmin’s way.
Until one fateful Tuesday, about two months after the first invitation.
Sunghoon rarely talked to you about his newfound friends; he knew you didn’t approve of them and he didn’t want to upset you. This particular piece of news, though, was just too exciting to keep from you. After all, you were his best friend. He wanted you to be a part of his new life.
“Guess what the guys and I are doing on Sunday,” he said. You nodded for him to continue, somewhat distracted by the cinnamon rolls you were baking together in his kitchen, not entirely sure when ‘the guys’ had become a thing. “Jeongmin’s cousin is in town, and he has a fancy new car. We’re gonna hotwire it, drive it down to the cliff, and set it on fire.”
You stopped dead in your tracks, your jaw dropping open. “What? Sunghoon, that��s too dangerous.”
“That’s why we’ll do it at the cliff. There’s nothing around there that could burn down,” he explained, like that made it okay.
If it weren’t for his completely serious tone and expression, you would have thought he was joking. You set down the mixing bowl you were holding. “No, you could get hurt,” you said, adding, “And what if you get caught? That’s grand larceny and arson.”
“The guy’s an asshole anyway,” he said nonchalantly, not listening to you.
“That doesn’t make it legal, Hoon. Or safe. I’m serious. You can’t do that.”
He folded his arms across his chest, scowling. “You’re just jealous,” he said.
“I don’t want you to go to jail,” you corrected.
“No, you’re jealous I finally have friends other than you. Like, cool, normal, friends,” he snapped, angrier than you’d ever seen him.
Never in your life had he raised his voice at you. You pretty much never fought, aside from short bouts of time when one of you was upset for one reason or another, but you always smoothed things over through calm, measured conversations. Not arguments like this.
You paused, stepping away from the counter, from him. “Is that what this is about? I’m not good enough for you?” you asked, your voice soft.
He had never once indicated he was unhappy with your friendship, with your relaxed hangouts in each other’s houses and comfortable outings to cinemas and restaurants and bookstores. But clearly he wanted something else: to be cool, normal, and have friends that weren’t shy recluses.
You trusted him. He was your whole world, and you’d always assumed you were his too.
“That’s not what I meant,” he said, pulling back his words as you turned to leave. He followed you, pleading, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it.”
“I’m going home,” you stated firmly, rushing out of his house and slamming the front door shut behind you.
——————————
By Sunday evening, you cracked. You had been avoiding Sunghoon for the last two days, and both of your families had noticed. You couldn’t stop thinking about that night, if he would be caught, if he was going to be okay. There was no way you’d be able to talk to his parents without him finding out unless he was out at figure skating training, so you confided in your dad. And he called Sunghoon’s mom right then and there.
“You did the right thing, Y/N. I’m proud of you,” your dad said after he hung up, patting your head.
“It doesn’t feel like I did,” you mumbled, your insides twisting and twisting away.
“I know, honey.” Your dad rubbed your shoulders comfortingly, before offering, “Do you want to go out for ice cream? Take your mind off it? I can call off work.”
You clung to him for a few more seconds, then let go. “I just want to be alone for a while, if that’s okay,” you said, retreating to your bedroom while your dad left for his night shift at the plant.
You weren’t sure how long you lay in your bed staring at the ceiling in complete silence, numbed by guilt, before your bedroom door swung open and Sunghoon barged into your room. In your state, you hadn’t even heard him enter your house. You scrambled to your feet.
“Did you fucking snitch on me?”
He was in all black, with a graphic t-shirt over a long sleeved polo, ripped jeans, and boots. With his hair styled and jewellery on, he must’ve been ready to leave the house, because that was how he normally dressed to meet Jeongmin and his gang.
“Hoon-”
“I told you that in confidence,” he snapped, shutting your bedroom door. His eyes, narrowed in hatred, glowered at you. You walked over to him and reached for his hand, but he slapped you away, recoiling at your touch like you were a hot stove. “How could you do this to me?”
“I was worried about you,” you said, your tone begging, mollifying. You rarely saw him this angry, and never had that anger been directed at you.
“Bullshit. My parents just screamed at me for two hours. Jeongmin’s gonna be pissed at me,” he fumed. “You weren’t fucking worried about me. You didn’t want me to be doing things without you.”
You dug your nails into your palms, trying to stop yourself from crying. It seemed to work, for a while, anyway. “Is that how you see me? As a needy pest who won’t let you go?” you asked, each word a chore to get out, your eyes already stinging. Not from his words, but from the sheer contempt in his expression.
Had he really spent the last sixteen years so desperate to get rid of you, like you were a persistent barnacle on a ship that refused to leave? Did he hate you that much? How had you never known?
He took a step towards you. His eyes were cold, his jaw was clenched, and you couldn’t even recognise him. You stepped back cautiously.
“Oh, like you’re some perfect angel,” he spat through gritted teeth. 
“I’m not. I just don’t want you to throw away your future. I-”
“You know what your problem is?” he shouted, cutting you off. He took yet another step forward, and you again stepped back. The backs of your knees hit your bed frame. “You’re a hypocrite. You hold everyone to such a high moral standard that no one is ever good enough for you. Not me, and not yourself. That’s why you fucking hate yourself so much.”
You couldn’t speak. Your heart was firmly lodged in your throat. For several agonising seconds, the only things you could hear were his furious breathing and your own heartbeat pounding in your ears.
“I think you should go home,” you finally said after a long pause. Your voice was shaking as you held back tears. “We can talk about this when you’ve calmed down-”
“Don’t fucking tell me to calm down!”
Sunghoon raised his hand to push back his fringe, but you didn’t know that. Because when his hand came up, you flinched. 
He lowered his hand immediately, only then noticing that he’d backed you into a corner. Instead of shock or anger or hurt, there was nothing but pure, unadulterated fear in your eyes.
“Did you think I was going to hit you?” he whispered, stepping back.
You squeezed your eyes shut and turned away, walking to your open window and resting your hands on the windowsill. “Please leave,” you said simply, fighting to keep your voice stable as tears began to roll down your face, not looking at him.
He stood and waited for a minute, watching you. You could feel his gaze. But when you refused to turn back around, he sighed and left. You heard your bedroom door close, and then your front door a few seconds later, and then it was so, so quiet.
——————————
You and Sunghoon avoided each other like the plague after that fight, although that torture hadn’t lasted long. Within two weeks, he’d withdrawn from school and vanished. His parents told you he’d gone to a boarding school in a different town, but they didn’t say where or why.
You never saw him again.
Being in your hometown for those last two years of high school was difficult for you. Having to live just down the road from his family home, constantly surrounded by all of your old haunts, made it hard for you to get him out of your head.
After high school you’d gone to a small university to do your first year with a conditional offer from your dream school in your back pocket. You needed time to save up money, and you were hoping to secure a scholarship with your first year grades.
You’d been lucky enough to make a new friend, Heeseung. Like you, he was only in that university temporarily to work his way into a scholarship. Your relationship was initially one of convenience and comfort — neither of you were particularly keen on mixing with the other students you never planned to see again after your first year — but you quickly became genuine friends.
You kept each other motivated, and both managed to secure transfers before your second year started. In fact, you’d done so well that your then-university had begged you to stay, offering you scholarship after scholarship and full fee remissions. But you both turned them down. You had loftier ambitions.
Once you moved away to university, things got better. Of course, the vestiges remained. You still had Sunghoon’s Spotify playlists in your account, your shared arcade membership card in your wallet, and some of his socks mixed in with your own. Before you fought he’d borrowed your favourite pair of red shrimp socks, and now you were never going to get them back.
But you didn’t think about him nearly as often as you used to. He was no longer a ghost living in your head, but a will-o’-the-wisp that occasionally caught your eye when you saw something that reminded you of him.
And now you and Heeseung were standing in the foyer of your new dorm with nothing from your past but a small suitcase each, in the university you’d been chasing your entire lives, ready to start your second year. 
“We made it,” Heeseung whispered to you, still not fully comprehending it all. You were really here.
“I don’t think I’ve ever been this nervous in my life,” you whispered back.
“Me too. If we weren’t roommates I’d be shitting bricks by now.”
The school had been gracious enough to allow you and Heeseung to live together in a small apartment within the music students’ dorm, since you were pretty sure at least one of you would have gone bonkers if you were separated. You would be sharing the floor with another similar apartment housing three students who would meet you in the foyer to help you move in.
Right on time, one of them (you presumed) came bounding down the stairs excitedly. He broke into a broad smile the second he saw your suitcases, his originally stern-looking features softening instantly as he did.
“Are you the transfers? Nice to meet you! I’m Jay. We spoke on the phone.”
You spoke up first when it became clear Heeseung was far too anxious to talk. “Hi! I’m Y/N, and this is Heeseung. Nice to meet you too.”
“Welcome aboard,” Jay said, easily picking up your suitcase before you could object. Heeseung fumbled for his own. “My roommates are just finishing getting your apartment ready. I hope you don’t mind.”
“Shouldn’t that be the school’s job?” you asked, following him up the stairs.
“This place can be a bit of a circus, believe it or not,” Jay remarked, making you and Heeseung exchange glances. When you reached the fifth floor, not a single hair on his head was out of place even though your bag was heavy as fuck.
“Thank you,” you said.
“No problem. That’s us over there,” he said, pointing to the first door on the level, “and this is you guys.”
The apartment was modestly-sized and simple, but clean and otherwise perfect. Jay introduced you to his first roommate Jake, who was sitting at the kitchen counter when you arrived.
“Thanks for setting all of this up for us. It must’ve been a lot of work,” Heeseung said, finally speaking after you elbowed him in the side (be normal, man). “You’ve been so helpful.”
“It’s nothing. Jay and I both transferred here last semester too, so we know how hard it can be,” Jake said kindly, waving away your gratitude. “Our other roommate did the same for us back then.”
“Speaking of which, Hoon! Come out here and meet the new students!” Jay called.
A third voice came floating from down the corridor. “Coming!”
When the aforementioned roommate emerged from the corridor, your heart stopped. Your blood turned to lead in your veins. Your ears began ringing, the sound so loud it washed away almost everything else.
You could barely hear Jake as he said, “Hoon, these are our new neighbours, Heeseung and Y/N. Guys, this is-”
“Sunghoon,” you finished. His name came out of your mouth, but it didn’t sound like your voice. Your hands were numb.
“Y/N,” Sunghoon said, at the exact same time.
Although he was taller now, with a broader frame, a sharper jaw, and a deeper voice, it was still him. He was frozen in shock, looking right at you, unblinking. He had on a white t-shirt that read ‘rise above’ that he’d had since the first year of high school — you bought it for him for his fifteenth birthday. It had been massively oversized on his thin body back then, but now he filled it out nicely.
Right there, as you stood in the kitchen of your new apartment, all the guilt and heartbreak and mourning that you thought you had left behind in the child that died three years ago came rushing back to you, squeezing the air from your lungs.
And in that moment you were reminded yet again of the lesson you had spent the last three years of your life learning day after day after day: movies lied.
The real heartbreak was never the big fight. It was every time after when the other person crossed your mind in idle thoughts or memories, every time you saw or heard something that reminded you of them, every time you pulled up their contact on your phone and read the distant timestamp of your final conversation.
It was every belonging of theirs they left behind in your childhood bedroom, and everything you owned that had been a gift from them. It was every food you ever ate together and every song you ever listened to together and every place you ever went to together.
It was every time they reached out from beyond the grave and touched some part of your life and you had to lose them all over again.
You looked at him, and he looked at you. His eyes hadn’t changed at all. You were sixteen once more: standing in his kitchen making cinnamon rolls, locking your bedroom door behind him after the last time you spoke because you were scared he would return, desperately running away from him in the school halls.
He glanced down at your hands, your fingers laced together to hide the fact that they were shaking. You had a habit of doing that when you were nervous. Around your left wrist was a silver bracelet, one that he’d gotten you on a whim six years ago. You still had it. And you still wore it. And it was you.
Jay smiled cheerily, oblivious. “Do you guys know each other?”
——————————
Your first week of your second year was amazing. You were finally at your dream university in your dream major, with a full-ride scholarship under your belt and your best friend right by your side. It was everything you and Heeseung had worked so hard for.
The building you lived in was a dorm just for music scholars, a small, close-knit group of under thirty students. Most of them, like Jay and Jake, also bled money.
But your experience was somewhat soured by one thing: Park Sunghoon. He was everywhere.
Of course, that was to be expected. It was a small cohort, the only new friends you’d made so far were his roommates, and you were literally neighbours.
After the day you’d moved in, neither of you had spoken a word to each other. You ran into him constantly, and you were always going to classes and grabbing lunch together, but you’d never talked to him directly. He was just always there.
On Thursday, as the five of you left a lecture together, Sunghoon politely excused himself. “I won’t join you guys for lunch today. I need to pick up something from the shops.”
So you found yourself sitting in the food court with Heeseung, Jay, and Jake. When the conversation naturally fizzled out, it was only quiet for a few seconds before Jay clapped his hands together and asked, “Okay, I’ll bite. What’s the deal with you and Sunghoon?”
You looked at Heeseung for guidance. On that first night, you’d already told him everything. He shrugged.
“Uh- well. We grew up together, and when we were sixteen we had a falling out,” you answered cautiously.
“Then you lost touch?” Jake frowned.
“You could say that,” you said, reaching for Heeseung’s hand under the table and adding, “I think Sunghoon should probably be the one to tell you the rest, though. When he’s ready.”
——————————
At Heeseung’s insistence (listen, you’re clearly still hurting over this, and it would be good for you to talk to him, at least), you bullied yourself into texting Sunghoon at the end of your first week. With trembling hands, you asked him if he would meet you in the botanical gardens on Sunday. He replied almost instantly: what time?
Waiting for him on a park bench, chronically early as you always were, you were bouncing your leg so much that the entire bench was shaking. The last time you’d spoken to him was over three years ago, when you’d pleaded with him to get out of your room.
You had drawn up an agreement with Heeseung that morning: if things went south, you would send him an S.O.S. message so he could come by and pretend to whisk you away to tend to an Urgent Apartment Matter. You even programmed your phone to text him automatically if you pressed your power button five times in a row. He called you ‘insufferably paranoid’, which you took as a compliment.
Sunghoon was a minute late, and, by the looks of it, just as anxious as you were.
“Hey.”
“Hi.”
He sat down next to you, a polite distance away. It was almost like how you used to sit in your neighbourhood park late at night after you’d aged out of the playground, eating convenience store ramen together until a concerned stranger or annoyed police officer told you to go home.
You both looked around for a while before you couldn’t take it anymore and bit the bullet. “How have you been?” you asked, stilted.
“Good. I’ve been good.” He cleared his throat and rubbed his sweaty palms on his jeans, nodding at nothing. “What about you?”
“Good.” You paused too, searching your brain for something to say.
“I went to military school,” he blurted out, knowing you were too polite to ask him directly. “Um- for the last two years of high school. That’s why I disappeared.”
Military school? So the rumours floating around the town had been right.
“Madam Choi kept asking me about you,” you told him after a while. Madam Choi was the sweet, grandmotherly owner of the convenience store on the corner of your street who always asked how you were doing and chastised you for eating too many snacks even though your unhealthy diets kept her shop afloat. It was the only topic you could think of that wasn’t too painful to bring up.
Sunghoon laughed at that, a sound you hadn’t heard for years. He loosened up, and you did too. Your awkwardness gradually began melting away as he told you about Jay and Jake, about his time at military school, and about all the cool spots in the city you should check out. You told him about Heeseung, your previous university, and how you didn’t know how to navigate your new university’s portal because it was designed to frustrate.
Conspicuously, neither of you brought up the past. Reminiscing was off the table, an arrangement implicitly reached between you two at some point during the conversation. Even when you finally worked up the courage to ask what you’d been wanting to ask for the last three years, you still couldn’t bring yourself anywhere close to acknowledging what happened.
“Are you still mad at me?” you asked.
Sunghoon didn’t hesitate for even a second, which made you smile. “No.”
As he continued talking, however, it became clear that he was considering every word he said before he said it. He was careful, deliberate, holding back.
“I’ve grown up since then,” he said slowly. “I haven’t been mad for a long time. Actually, I wanted to thank you for doing what you did. I could have been sitting in jail by now.” He clasped his hands together and turned to you. “Are you still mad at me?”
You were equally as assured and quick with your own response. “No. I was never mad at you.”
“You should’ve been,” he joked. “I caused you so much trouble, always waking you up in the middle of the night and crashing in your room.”
You laughed and shook your head. “I’m happy things worked out for you, Hoon. And that you got into university despite everything that happened,” you said.
“Thanks,” he smiled. Although the rest of him looked older and more mature, his smile remained the same.
“If I’d done those things I never would’ve gotten a second chance,” you mused, more to yourself than to him, but he heard it anyway.
Instantly, his mood soured.
“Okay, so did you rat on me to protect me and my future? Or because you were jealous? Because that sounds like jealousy,” he snapped.
Shit. You reached for your phone and pressed the home button five times. But he wasn’t wrong.
Yes, you had been worried about him as you’d said back then, but you were also jealous. Not of his new friends, but of his life. His parents were rich, and he had two of them. If he had gone out that night and been caught, there was a non-zero chance that he could have gotten off with a slap on the wrist.
His parents had the money to ship him off to a private military school for two whole years at the drop of a hat, and he’d been able to come straight to your dream university. If you had joined him and Jeongmin that night, you would’ve been locked up without question.
“You ruined my life,” Sunghoon hissed, his eyes now dark and his body tense. “Do you know that?”
“You ruined your own life when you were planning to commit arson and didn’t listen to me when I told you to stop,” you countered.
He set his jaw and turned away with a scoff. “I can’t believe you.”
In the distance, you saw Heeseung jogging over to you. He must’ve been hiding in another part of the park, waiting. You weren’t the only insufferably paranoid one, it seemed.
“This isn’t how I wanted today to go, Hoon,” you sighed.
“Don’t call me that,” he spat, standing up.
“Y/N!” Heeseung shouted as he reached the bench. His face fell the moment he saw the look in your eyes. “There is an Urgent Apartment Matter. We must tend to it right away,” he stuttered, grabbing your hand and yanking you to your feet before Sunghoon even had the time to blink.
The two of you ran.
——————————
You and Sunghoon had swiftly gone right back to ignoring each other, which was pretty impressive considering you were almost always together. Jay and Jake seemed annoyingly hell-bent on taking you and Heeseung under their wing — as fellow transfers themselves, they wanted to help you acclimatise — and Sunghoon didn’t have any other friends. So he was constantly with you in classes, at parties, or hanging out in your goddamn apartment.
He spent more time staring at you than he would have liked to admit. In between gaps in conversations, or when you were distracted by one of Jay’s dissertation-length speeches about some inane topic or stupid fact, he got the chance to really look at you for the first time in years. Every time he did he felt a strange ache in his chest. You were like an actor he already knew playing a character he’d never seen before.
“Dude, why would you even say that? You called them a hypocrite?” Jake chastised, when Sunghoon finally revealed the details behind your falling out in high school a few days after Sunday.
“I just can’t imagine you as that kind of guy,” Jay said, stunned. He was still trying to picture Park Sunghoon, the would-be arsonist. 
Often, Sunghoon found himself staring not when Jay was rambling or Jake was telling you a joke, but specifically when you were with Heeseung. There was something about the way you two interacted that made his heart sting. You were comfortable with him, and he with you.
You knew he liked to sit on the inside of restaurant booths facing the door, and he knew your Subway order by heart. You kept track of the stock of his favourite drinks in your fridge, and he always had a spare charger in his bag for all the times you forgot to bring your own. You were so in tune with each other that you would tell when the other wanted to go home without needing to ask and built effortlessly on each other’s jokes. You even kind of talked the same.
“And then you said it again? Are you serious?” Jay groaned in frustration when he heard the park story. Everyone had noticed the considerable shift in mood between you and Sunghoon since Sunday, but no one had dared to mention it.
“They’re trying so hard with you, man. Why would you do that?” Jake sighed.
Sunghoon pulled hard at his hair, equally frustrated, and flopped face down on the sofa. “I don’t know! It just came out.”
There was a substantial part of him that kmew it was because he was scared he hadn’t changed. That he was still the kind of person who called their best friend a hypocrite and accused them of being jealous when they tried to protect him. That you could see that, and that Jay and Jake would realise it soon too.
The other day at the juice bar Heeseung bought you a warm honey lemon tea. When he ordered it, you and Sunghoon immediately looked at each other before turning away. Windows open to air out the stench of cigarette smoke. Your secret stash of lemons and honey. Yellow post-it notes on your bedside table. All the hours you spent taking care of him, even as he spiralled out of control.
You hadn’t even asked for it; Heeseung somehow knew you had a sore throat that day without you telling him. Apparently he could hear it in your voice, which was (according to him) slightly scratchy and hoarse. Sunghoon couldn’t hear a thing, though. You sounded the exact same to him.
It was clear that Heeseung was familiar with the person you were now, that he knew you, and he knew how to be your best friend. That was a skill that Sunghoon had lost years ago, and clearly he didn’t quite know you anymore.
At the park you hadn’t cried once, although he was sure the sixteen-year-old you would have. Perhaps you just cried less now. Perhaps you’d given up on him and no longer expected anything else from him but to be disappointed.
“You need to apologise to them,” Jake scolded.
“They won’t forgive me,” Sunghoon mumbled into the sofa fabric.
Jay threw a pillow at him. “No offence, Hoon, but from what you’ve told us I think you’re a pretty shit judge of character.”
——————————
You had the apartment to yourself that Thursday night because Heeseung had rented a studio to practise after-hours and wouldn’t be back till sunrise. Someone knocked on your door. When you didn’t answer it immediately, a painfully familiar voice rang out from the other side.
“It’s me.”
Dread was not an emotion you’d ever associated with Sunghoon, but it was all you felt when you opened the door for him. When you were kids he never waited for you to do so; he always just let himself in. You sat down at the kitchen counter together, side by side.
“Since when do you watch Queer Eye?” he asked, noticing your laptop screen.
“Heeseung introduced me to it,” you said, pushing a glass of water across the counter to him. His face darkened at the name, but you chose to ignore it. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”
Sunghoon bit his lip. “I wanted to say I’m sorry,” he started, wooden. While he’d seemed guarded and on edge on Sunday, now he seemed scared. “For what I said to you. And for- for everything.”
You sat rigidly on the bar stool, self-conscious, not knowing what to say.
“I had a lot of time to think over the last three years, and I realised I was insecure. I was so desperate to be seen as ‘cool’ and Jeongmin knew that. You were right; he was preying on me because he could tell how much I wanted to be a part of his world. You saw right through me because you knew- you know me better than anyone. So I lashed out at you.
“I tried so hard to put that part of my life behind me — I never told Jay or Jake about it, even — and when you came back I panicked. It was a reminder of all the fucked up things I did and the person I used to be. I didn’t want to have to deal with it, and I took it out on you again.
“I’m sorry. And thank you. For always being there for me to pick up the pieces. I never deserved that sort of kindness.”
He watched you nervously, waiting for a response. You reached for the rubber band around your wrist and snapped it. It didn’t hurt, but it helped to distract you. He glanced down at your hand, recognising another of your old habits.
“Stop doing that,” he chided, his eyes watering. At that moment, he sounded just like he used to when you were younger. You remembered him saying those exact words in that exact tone. Of all the things he had said, that was what made you want to cry.
“I missed you so much,” you finally admitted after a long pause, inhaling shakily. “I felt like I ruined our friendship. I never stopped wondering if I made the right decision, I- I thought I’d lost you forever.”
He wrapped his arms around you, hugging you tight. His hugs were just comforting as they had been when you were growing up. He was much stronger than you remembered, although perhaps you should have expected that. He’d changed his cologne since.
“You have nothing to feel guilty about,” he told you, stroking your hair gently. When you separated his eyes were shining with tears. He laughed, sniffling, holding your face in his hands.
“Can we be friends again?” you whispered.
“I’d like that,” he said, letting you go and hesitating for a few seconds before he next spoke. “Do you know what motivated me to change when I was in military school?”
“What?” You hugged him one last time before unconsciously reaching for your rubber band. Catching this, he raised an eyebrow and glanced pointedly at your wrist. You stopped, feeling scolded.
“The last time we talked back in high school, you thought I was going to hit you,” he began carefully. He took a deep breath, suddenly unable to look you in the eye now. “Seeing how scared you were, the fear on your face, I- I never wanted to make anyone feel like that again. Especially not you. I’m sorry.”
He’d started crying. He hardly ever cried when you were kids. You wiped away his tears with your shirt sleeve.
“Don’t be a stranger, okay?” he begged, clutching onto you with a vice grip. Between you and him he had always been the calm one, but now he was shaking and you could feel it.
You squeezed his hand. “I won’t.”
——————————
Something in you was repaired that day.
You were telling the truth when you said you had never stopped feeling guilty about what you did. Not being able to speak to Sunghoon after, not even knowing where he was or what he was doing, it had wrecked you.
For years you’d lived with the thought that the only person you’d ever trusted had always secretly resented you. Maybe everyone did — maybe you were a pest, a hypocrite, a loser. It made it hard for you to form new connections. Heeseung had chipped away at your defences for months before you felt safe enough to call him your friend.
But now you were sitting on the floor of Sunghoon’s living room, sharing a vodka Sprite with Heeseung while you watched the others play Mario Kart, and everything was fine.
You hadn’t spent too much time with Sunghoon alone, although the five of you were constantly together. Jake had even joked about blocking off the fifth floor from the other scholars and just leaving both of your front doors open to form one big apartment for the five of you. Functionally, it wouldn’t be that different from how you were already living.
“I’m hungry,” Heeseung piped up, pouting and nudging you. “Go buy me some chips?”
“Why can’t you go?” you asked.
“My head hurts,” he whined. If he was dehydrated, the smallest drop of alcohol could give him splitting headaches. “Don’t kick a man while he’s down.”
Before you could retort, Sunghoon handed him his Switch controller. “Hee, you play. I’ll go with them,” he offered.
“Thanks, man. Use my rewards card,” Heeseung said, handing you his wallet instead of just taking the rewards card out and passing that to you.
You used to joke that you could so easily max out all of his credit cards if you wanted to, but he swiftly pointed out that you also had a habit of giving him your entire wallet when he asked to borrow money or your transport card.
“I still can’t believe we've been in this city for just over a month and you already have six rewards cards,” you laughed, putting on your shoes.
As you and Sunghoon were walking out the door, Heeseung was still shouting, “Think of the points, dude! The points!”
The convenience store was just across the road from your dorm building, which was, as its name suggested, pretty convenient. Not as good for your heart health and nutrition, but whatever. It was drizzling slightly, but not enough for either of you to have bothered with an umbrella.
“Heeseung is so obsessed with collecting rewards points,” you joked, fiddling with his rewards card.
Sunghoon chuckled. “Is he always like that?”
You nodded. “Since I met him. You like him, though, right?”
“Yeah, I do. He’s fun,” he said. He wasn’t lying; he did actually like Heeseung. But he would be lying if he said your closeness to him didn’t bother him at all. Sunghoon didn’t want to think too much about the possible implications of his jealousy.
“I’m glad. I really like Jay and Jake, too,” you told him, pushing open the convenience store door. “I’ll go get Deungie’s chips, because he likes some weird obscure flavours.”
“I’ll get the normal stuff for everyone else,” Sunghoon said, asking, “the usual for you, yeah?”
You thought of the convenience store in your hometown, of Madam Choi, of your regular weekend sleepovers back in school. Rehearsed and practised, you two were in and out of the store in under two minutes. What did that say about either of you, that you were so skilled at buying snacks that you worked together like a well-oiled machine?
The drizzle was marginally heavier when you left. It was a short walk, but Sunghoon took off his white baseball cap and fixed it atop your head anyway.
“Thanks, Hoon,” you smiled. You never bothered fighting him when he did things like that for you; you hadn’t as a kid and you still didn’t now. He wouldn’t do it unless he wanted to, and he wasn’t the type to accept your refusals of help.
But it felt different years later, and you couldn’t quite put your finger on it.
“Why are you looking at me like that?” he asked, amused.
You quickly averted your gaze, not having noticed you’d been looking at him. “It’s just weird to have you back,” you said.
You’d had this conversation with him at least a dozen times over the last month. It still hadn’t quite sunk in yet that he was back in your life and you were back in his. That you hadn’t destroyed the life of your best friend by being a hypocrite.
Since then, you’d spent a lot of time thinking about the person you used to be: full of self-loathing and insecurity and fear that you would eventually ruin every relationship you had. Heeseung had been slightly hurt that you hadn’t told him about Sunghoon when it all happened. You admitted to him that you were scared he would think of you as a bad person.
Sunghoon smiled. “Is it a good weird or a bad weird?”
“It’s a good weird. I missed this,” you answered, holding up the bag of snacks in your hand. As was your usual routine, you carried the snacks and he carried the drinks, having immediately fallen into step.
He playfully bumped into you as you walked, though not nearly hard enough to knock you off balance. “I missed you,” he said, before reaching for his keys.
The conversation was the same, but the butterflies in your stomach were definitely a new development.
——————————
Since you reconnected, Sunghoon hadn’t been able to stop thinking about you.
“Dude, are you jealous of Heeseung?” Jay asked him one night, out of the blue, after you and Heeseung left their apartment to head back to your own. Well, it wasn’t entirely out of the blue; even he couldn’t deny that.
“Can’t I be jealous of my ex-best friend’s new best friend?” Sunghoon replied, already defensive.
“That’s not why you’re jealous, though, is it?” Jay pressed. “You’re posturing around him and you can’t stop looking at Y/N.”
“Shut up.” He was right, and deep down Sunghoon knew it.
He was never going to be your best friend again, and he wasn’t trying to be. Neither of you were the same people you had been three years ago, and you were different enough that if you met now, you probably wouldn’t have been close. You both had new friends, people who suited your current selves better.
He wanted to be something else.
“You need to tone down the staring, man. It’s getting a little too obvious,” Jake said. “Even Heeseung mentioned it to me the other day.”
Sunghoon swore under his breath. “He did?” Heeseung, of all people, noticing — had he mentioned it to you?
“For what it’s worth, I’m pretty sure they’re just friends,” Jay added, trying to be comforting.
Sunghoon sighed and finished his drink. It was a gin and tonic which he’d made so strong that it was basically straight gin with a drizzle of tonic water. He winced.
“I know, but they do everything together,” he mumbled, just barely self-aware enough to realise he was whining. “That used to be me.”
“They’re happy, you’re happy, and you guys are friends again. Isn't that what you wanted? Why focus on the past when you could be focusing on right now?” Jake asked.
“Because they trusted me for sixteen years and I basically told them I’d secretly hated them the whole time,” Sunghoon said, his voice rising. “I ruined them, and I’ll never forgive myself for that.”
Jay scowled and crossed his arms, kicking Sunghoon’s foot with his own. “You didn’t ruin anyone. They’re fine. You’re not the only thing that’s ever happened to them, and if you keep thinking like that you’ll never fully repair your relationship.”
Sunghoon stared at his empty glass. He needed another drink.
——————————
“It’s been two months since we moved here,” Heeseung told you randomly one day. You were at a ramen bar for dinner with him and Sunghoon to celebrate getting through the first half of the semester. Also, you were all out of food at home and neither of you were in the mood to cook.
“Has it?” You checked the date on your phone. Sure enough, he was right. You hadn’t even realised.
“It doesn’t feel like it,” Sunghoon said. You’d started looking at Sunghoon differently.
Firstly, he looked different. He towered over his former self, his shoulders were much wider than you recalled, and he’d lost some fat on his face, making his cheeks and jaw more angular. He wore his black hair longer than he used to and he didn’t have nearly as many dark colours in his wardrobe.
He’d always been good-looking, but you had never really recognised that before. Now, though, it was always on your mind. Now, when he smiled at you or fixed your hair after he put his cap on your head or leaned over you to plug in his laptop in lecture theatres, you got nervous.
His gestures had always made you feel warm and comfortable, but now they were also starting to make you feel shy. You’d never been particularly touchy with him even as kids — you shared beds with a wall of pillows in between you two — but now you couldn’t even bear the thought of holding onto his sleeve in a crowd so you wouldn’t get separated.
“Oi.” Heeseung kicked you hard under the table and pointed at your nearly empty bowl. “Earth to Y/N. Are you done?”
They were both staring at you. How long had you been zoning out?
“What? Yeah, I’m done. Did you say something?” you asked.
Heeseung laughed and pressed his index finger to the top of your head, pretending to push you down like a button, which he always did when he was making fun of you. He definitely knew what you’d been lost in thought about (do you know how much Sunghoon stares at you nowadays? I think he hates me).
“Heeseung said he’s meeting Jay and Jake at the studio,” Sunghoon filled you in, much more helpful. “So we can go home, or if you want we can walk around some more.” He sounded expectant, like he was hoping you’d agree to the latter. You did.
——————————
Once you saw Heeseung off at the bus stop, Sunghoon brought you to a run-down building four streets away from the ramen bar. In the hip, fashionable district of the city, amidst the trendy shops and cafés, the mould and peeling paint and water damage of the building made it stick out like a blister. 
You looked at the building, and then at him, and then back at the building. “Is this an assassination attempt?” you asked.
“Trust me,” he said, pushing the rusty steel door open with his foot.
“That’s not an answer. And your refusal to touch the door with your hands doesn’t exactly inspire trust,” you laughed, but you followed him with no hesitation.
It felt almost like when you used to go exploring the outskirts of your hometown by yourselves, far too late at night for kids your age. But this time, you didn’t have any snacks with you, nor games to keep yourselves occupied.
Sunghoon made a face at you and ushered you inside. “Shut up. I’m the city native here.”
“You’ve only been here a year longer than me,” you pointed out, looking around. The building wasn’t so much a building as it was a stairwell. Stuffy, dark, and dingy, it made you feel suffocated. “I’m going to die here,” you declared, sighing in resignation.
He rolled his eyes. “Oh my god. It’s not even that bad.”
As if on cue, the door slammed shut behind you, the sound echoing ominously in the tight space. What little light that had been coming in from the street lamps outside disappeared, except for a sliver of amber forcing its way through a gap in the door frame. He cursed under his breath.
“Hoon,” you called, desperately trying to spot him in the darkness, the rising panic clear in your words. “I swear, if I die tonight I’ll never stop haunting you.”
His reply came immediately, calm and measured, reassuring. “I’m right here. Give me your hand.”
You turned around at the sound of his voice and reached out blindly in front of you, hitting his shoulder. He found your hand and took it in his, the feeling of his palm against yours somehow soothing and stressful at the same time.
“You’re still scared of the dark?” he asked, joking, trying to ease your fear.
He used to scold you all the time for always sleeping with your light on, but no matter how many articles he sent you about why sleeping in the dark was important for healthy melatonin production, you never listened. Whenever he slept over in your room, he used an eye mask.
“Shut up, please.” Your voice was quiet and unconvincing; actually, you wanted nothing more than for him to keep talking. You couldn’t see anything, and all you had to ground you was his voice and his hand in yours. 
He squeezed your hand, softening his tone. “I’m sorry. I didn’t realise it would be this dark. It’s worth it, I promise.”
He led you up three flights of stairs by the hand and walked face first into what you assumed to be a locked door. “Ow. Motherfucker.”
You cackled at that.
The room (if you could call it that, since it was barely bigger than a cupboard) was lit with a single filament light bulb hanging from the ceiling. Aside from a couple of cardboard boxes, some pillows, and a bean bag, it was empty.
“That’s your old bean bag. The one you had in your room,” you said, recognising the green fabric immediately. You tensed when he brushed past you to shut the door to the room (supply cupboard?), but you tried your best to ignore it.
“Yeah, I brought it with me. I get homesick sometimes, so it helps,” he told you, sitting down on the small pile of pillows. You took the bean bag.
“It smells worse than I remembered,” you said, patting it. He pushed you in retaliation, laughing at you when you lost your balance.
“I have snacks and drinks in this box, and comics and books in that one,” he explained. “I wanted to get a mini-fridge in here but there isn’t an outlet.”
This was exactly how you used to spend your weekends when you didn’t have to study: snacks, drinks, and reading. Except now he handed you a can of hard seltzer instead of his yoghurt drinks of yore. 
“Is this legal? Does the building owner know you’re here?” you asked, somewhat sceptical. But you opened the can anyway and took a sip. It was warm, but not unpleasant.
“Of course. I’m a law abiding citizen.”
“You just jaywalked about ten minutes ago.”
“I’m generally a law abiding citizen.” He dug around in the box some more and produced a can of sangria (you despised sangria), gesturing to the room. “What do you think? Pretty cool, right?”
“Very,” you nodded, making yourself comfortable in the bean bag. You felt like you were in high school again, although you didn’t recall your spine hurting nearly as much then. Perhaps you were getting old. You needed proper back support now.
He kicked off his shoes. “Fuck off,” he laughed.
“I wasn’t being sarcastic!” you yelled, before you noticed- “My red shrimp socks!”
“Oh, right.” He glanced down at his feet and started casually taking the socks off. “Do you want them back?”
You gagged. “Not right now, dumbo!”
He used to be able to detect your sarcasm perfectly, always reading your tone with no margin of error, although it was probably unfair to expect him to still be able to after so many years.
“Come home with me,” Sunghoon said suddenly, still looking at his (your) socks. You looked at him, puzzled. “After the semester ends. We should go visit our families,” he added.
You thought for a minute and agreed. “I think my dad misses you.”
“My parents miss you too.” He leant back against the wall behind him, closed his eyes, and rested his head on your shoulder, declaring, “I’m tired.”
The room was so dark and small and quiet. His black hair tickled your neck, even though you could tell he was trying not to move around too much. You prayed he couldn’t hear how fast your heart rate had become. He’d always been a sleepy drinker, and you’d all been drinking pretty liberally during dinner earlier.
You tried to relax, as much as you could with his body pressed against yours, and closed your eyes too. So you didn’t see him reach for your hand until you felt his touch directly. He took your hand and pulled it into his lap, interlocking his fingers with yours and fiddling with your silver bracelet. You froze, your breathing shallow and your muscles tense.
“This is from that old charity shop behind the fruit store,” he mumbled, running the pad of his thumb over your knuckles. You could feel the vibrations of his throat against your shoulder as he spoke. “I bought it for you.”
“Hoon,” you said softly, your eyes now wide open. He hummed in response, still playing with your hand. “What are you doing?”
His reply was a non-answer. “I miss home.”
Tentatively, you lifted your hand to his head, stroking his hair in what you hoped would be a comforting gesture. He stayed quiet. His closeness was simultaneously the most nerve-wracking and most comforting thing. In all your life, you couldn’t ever recall sitting like this with him.
“Are you okay? Do you want to talk?” you asked, pulling your hand away, worried now.
He grabbed it and returned it to his hair, moving even closer to you. “That feels nice,” he sighed. His breath was warm against your neck, while the tip of his nose was cold. It made you shiver. “I’m fine. I just haven’t been home in a while.”
You felt terrible for never really having thought about what his two years in military school, being ripped away from his family at such short notice, must’ve been like. As far as you were aware he didn’t get to visit his family until he graduated, and you only knew that because you spent your own high school graduation period locked up in your house to avoid running into him.
Against your best efforts, the guilt came rushing back. You closed your eyes again and continued playing with Sunghoon’s hair, just how he liked it.
——————————
Two weeks later, you still didn’t know what to make of that night. You told Heeseung everything and asked him if you were going insane.
“Do you like him?” Heeseung asked as you two got ready to leave the house. You were going out to get drinks with the others.
“I don’t know,” you groaned, yanking the windows shut much harder than you had intended. He jumped at the sound, and you winced. “Sorry. I hate this, man.”
“Do you want my opinion?” he asked.
“It depends on what it is.”
He snorted. “I think you do like him and you don’t want to admit it. Why is that?”
You rushed to put on your shoes as he waited for you. “I just- what if this fucks up our friendship a second time? There’s too much history between us, right?”
“Well, your heart doesn’t seem to think so,” he said, opening the front door. The neighbouring front door opened too, at the exact same time, and out stepped Sunghoon. He broke into a wide smile the second he saw you.
Heeseung lowered his head and said quietly, “Clearly, he doesn’t think so, either.”
——————————
You were far too nervous to drink even after the forty minute journey to the bar. Heeseung’s words hadn’t left your head for even a second, and he could definitely tell from the way he kept grinning at you.
“Are you sure you don’t want any?” Heeseung asked for the third time, offering you his glass. You had the same taste in drinks, so you usually shared.
“I don’t feel like drinking tonight,” you said, again for the third time.
“Guess who else isn’t drinking tonight,” he teased, way too loud, nodding to Sunghoon and his glass of water. That didn’t even make sense.
“Shut up,” you hissed. Heeseung giggled, already tipsy, and leaned on you. Sunghoon caught your eye from across the table and smiled. If he’d heard what the other man said, he showed no indication of it. You smiled back.
Jake returned to the table, tapping Heeseung on the shoulder.
“I can’t do it anymore. It’s your turn,” Jake sighed, exasperated, collapsing into his seat. He’d been on wingman duty for Jay, and (apparently, because you’d never been unlucky enough to witness it yourself) Jay was a terrible flirt.
Heeseung picked up his glass, downed what was left in it in one gulp, and set it back down on the table with a loud thump. “Alright, here I go,” he declared. You watched him carefully as he walked over to the bar, but he didn’t seem too drunk yet. He’d be fine.
At the booth behind where Jay was, however, you saw someone else who made your blood run cold.
“Hoon, don’t turn around, but Jeongmin is here,” you began. Jeongmin was staring intensely at you. Sunghoon sat up straight in alarm. Maybe you looked familiar to him and he was trying to place you. 
Jake, ever the quick thinker, said, “You guys should leave. I’ll stay and let Jay and Hee know what happened.” Sunghoon was still frozen.
“Thanks, Jake. Pass these to Heeseung for me.” You fished your keys (Heeseung hadn’t brought his own) out of your pocket to toss them to Jake, grabbed Sunghoon by the arm, and dragged him out of the bar.
“Aren’t you sober? Why don’t your legs work?” you grunted, trying to shake him to attention and pull him down the street at the same time. A passing car revving its engine snapped him out of it, whatever it was.
“Fuck, yeah. Sorry,” Sunghoon mumbled. Before you could even ask him if he was okay, what you’d been trying so hard to avoid happened.
“Park Sunghoon.”
You could pick out Jeongmin’s voice anywhere. It was low, rough, and sharp. He somehow looked identical to how he looked back in high school, if only slightly thinner and more tired.
“You. You called the cops on us that night,” Jeongmin hissed. jabbing an accusatory finger at Sunghoon.
“I didn’t,” Sunghoon stated calmly, but you could tell he was on edge. He subtly pushed you behind him.
“Yeah, right. On the one night we get busted the new kid just happens to not show up,” Jeongmin scoffed, taking a step towards you. 
Sunghoon held up his hands. “Look, man, I don’t want to fight. I didn’t call the cops on you.”
Jeongmin squared his shoulders and punched him hard in the jaw without warning. The silver ring he was wearing drew a deep red gash across Sunghoon’s cheek.
As if on auto-pilot, like it was second nature to him, Sunghoon immediately returned the blow with a punch of his own before you even had the time to think. You gasped, Jeongmin’s nose cracked, and Sunghoon took advantage of the distraction to kick him hard in the knee, knocking him to the ground.
Then he grabbed your hand and ran.
——————————
The walk back to the dorm was silent. Sunghoon’s lips were pressed tightly together, his eyebrows were furrowed, and his fists were clenched like he was trying not to cry. You remembered the days when you, not him, were usually the one who needed comforting.
It reassured you to some degree, though, that he wouldn’t hide his sadness from you like he used to. You reached for his hand the second you were out of Jeongmin’s line of sight and threaded your fingers between his. His knuckles were bruised.
Wordlessly, he handed you his keys and you unlocked his front door.
“Do you have a first aid kit?” you asked.
“Under the kitchen sink,” he said flatly, sitting down on the sofa.
You pulled it out from the back corner of the kitchen cabinet with great difficulty, joined him on the sofa, and started cleaning the cut on his jaw. He winced when the alcohol swab made contact with his skin.
“Sorry. I’m almost done,” you promised, tossing the swab aside and covering the cut up. It took all of twenty seconds. “Do you want to talk?”
Sunghoon closed his eyes and sighed, dropping his head. “I shouldn’t have hit him. I thought I was past that behaviour. I don’t-”
He stopped talking. You put your hand over his and waited. His bottom lip started to quiver as he held back tears.
“I don’t want to be that person again,” he sobbed, and the sound broke your heart.
Through the school grapevine you heard about fights with kids of neighbouring schools, breaking and entering, the like. But even now, so many years later, you didn’t fully know what he did with Jeongmin and his gang. You never asked, and he never volunteered that information.
He was crying. “I let my parents down. Every time I see them I just remember how angry they were at me. I’m a terrible son. Nothing I do will ever be able to erase that I humiliated them, I failed them, I brought shame to the whole family, I-”
You pulled him into a hug, feeling how his body trembled as he fought to speak.
“You’re not a terrible son, Hoon,” you whispered, as he sobbed into your hair.
He shook his head and pushed you away. “I shouldn’t have hit him. I think I broke his nose,” he repeated, almost frantic in his insistence. It wasn’t a state you’d seen him in before.
“But he hit you first,” you noted.
Finally, at your childish response, he cracked a small smile. “Weren’t you always the one who said violence was never the answer?” he laughed. His eyes were still glistening with tears, but at least he’d calmed down.
“Usually it isn’t, but I don’t subscribe to universal codes of human conduct anymore,” you told him. “Do you?”
He paused for a bit, staring at you, unable to find the words to reply. You smiled, swiped the tears on his cheeks away with a gentle hand, and got up to put away the first aid kit. It was late, and you were both tired.
“I love you,” Sunghoon said over his shoulder, his voice still thick with emotion. He said that often nowadays, although it wasn’t something he did previously. Neither of you ever felt the need to declare that when you were younger; it was a given.
“I love you too, Hoon,” you replied, still busy trying to make room in the cluttered space under his kitchen sink for the kit.
All the traces of his crying vanished when he next spoke. “No, I’m in love with you.”
You dropped the package of sponges in your hands. Your mind went blank.
There was something about the phrase ‘in love’ that you had never really understood. It implied love was all consuming, like a physical swallowing whole of your being. You felt love for others, but you’d never felt it so much that you were in the state of love.
Until you heard it from him. And then you realised you were already there.
“Say something. Please,” he begged, panicked by your silence.
“Hoon-”
“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that,” he mumbled, cutting you off, leaning back against the sofa with a hand over his eyes.
Sunghoon was not an interrupter. In all the years you’d known him, the only time he’d ever interrupted you was during your big final fight in your bedroom, when you’d snitched on him.
You left the first aid kit on the floor and sat down next to him. He didn’t move. You tapped the back of his hand to get him to look at you. Reluctantly, he did, but only through the gaps between his fingers.
“I’m in love with you too,” you admitted.
He was speechless at hearing his words echoed back to him, frozen for a good ten seconds before his gaze flickered down to your lips.
“Can I?” he asked, his voice quiet.
You nodded, and he kissed you. He placed one hand on the back of your neck to pull you closer while his other hand, bruised knuckles and all, grabbed one of your own. He laced your fingers together tightly, like he never wanted to let you go.
Your free hand ghosted over the line of his jaw, past the bandage you’d just put on his face and down his neck to his chest, warm and solid. He shivered under your touch.
“I love you, Hoon,” you breathed when you separated.
He gave you one last quick kiss on the tip of your nose. “I’ll never get tired of hearing that,” he whispered giddily, brushing his thumb across your bottom lip.
For the first few weeks after you reconnected, both of you had tried to return to what you once were. But it quickly became clear that that was never going to happen. Even after you had paved over the road, underneath the new asphalt the old potholes were still there, and nothing you did would ever fully correct them.
You had to look forward. Sunghoon was never going to be your best friend again, not like before. You would never get back your old relationship, full of childlike innocence and void of conflict. But that was okay. You were here, and he was here, and that was enough.
“Then I’ll keep saying it. I love you, I love you, I love you,” you repeated, leaning into his side and laying your head on his shoulder.
“I love you too. So much,” he said, putting his arm around you and letting you tuck your head into the crook of his neck. “You have no idea.”
He was tired of running and hiding from who he used to be, and going on the defensive and lashing out every time he was confronted with his past. He was done torturing his sixteen-year-old self.
You and him had something new. It wasn’t better, it wasn’t more. It was just different. You had your whole lives in front of you — an endless stretch of even, untouched, fresh road — waiting for you, and it would be stupid to focus on what lay behind you. You still had so much left to explore together.
——————————
thanks for reading <3
-minastras
1K notes · View notes
feelbokkie · 10 days
Text
i'll be here for you
Tumblr media
☀️Feelbokkie M.list☀️
genre: sick fic, angst
pov: 2nd person
description: Seungmin can tell instantly from your voice that something is wrong, so he drops everything to take care of you.
pairing: bf!seungmin x gn!reader
warnings: hospitals, swearing, mentioning of food and eating, open ending, talking about weight, reference to death
word count: 3,054
a/n: allow me to be self indulgent and dramatic and over exaggerate for a moment.
©feelbokkie (2024) — all rights reserved. reposting/modification of any kind is not tolerated.
Tumblr media
Mong, mong. Mong, mong. 
You sluggishly pull your phone out of your pocket, sitting as you do so. You let out a long, shaky sigh before plastering on a smile and answering the phone. You’re not sure why. It’s not like he can see your face through the phone. But maybe smiling will trick the rest of your body into thinking everything is okay.
“My Seungminnie!” You cheer into the phone, your face winces in pain from the sudden movement.
“Hi Y/n,” You can picture the small smile that’s slowly creeping onto his face vividly. “Did you just get home?”
“No,” you lean your back against your headrest. “I got home earlier than I thought I would. I read the end time on my schedule wrong.”
You can hear the chaos in the background. Changbin’s voice booms over everyone as he yells about something to do with Minho and Hyunjin. You can make out Felix’s faint laughter too. “You should’ve called me.”
“I didn’t want to interrupt practice. If I called you, you would have worried. How’s dance practice?”
“Hmm, Minho hyung has glared at Chan hyung twice, put Hyunjin in a headlock, and threatened all of us with various cooking styles about six times. He’s going to be sending me to you as soup.”
“Soupmin doesn’t sound too bad. Tell him to send side dishes,”
“Speaking of which, did you have a good lunch today?”
“I did,” You lie. “What about you? Did Minho let you eat or is he punishing you guys for not picking up the choreography?”
“We nailed 2 songs so he treated us. I had kimchi-jjigae!”
“You’re going to turn into kimchi-jjigae at this rate. You had it almost every day this week.”
“You just said you’d like Soupmin! ...Ugh, hyung, get off,” you hear a loud slap and some more laughter through the phone. The background laughter and chatter quickly becomes distant. “Sorry, Chan hyung lives in my bubble. What did you have for lunch?”
Click!
You assume that Seungmin had enough of whatever is going on in the practice room and left to talk to you somewhere peaceful. “Just some leftovers... I had some rice from dinner a couple of days ago so I make kimchi fried rice with some chicken.”
Seungmin is quiet on the other end for a second, “What did you really have?”
“I just told you,” You sit up, shifting your phone to your other hand and pressing it against your ear again.
“You’re hiding something. A couple of days ago you said you had pasta. What did you have for lunch today?”
“Kimchi—“ You double down.
Seungmin lets out a loud sigh, “This is a silly thing to lie about. You know that, right?”
“I’m not—“ You pause as the pain in your stomach reminds you that it's still there. “Fine, I just had some soda for lunch.”
“That’s all?”
“I told you, I wasn’t working as long as I thought—“
“You’re not eating properly and I can tell by your voice that you aren’t sleeping properly... Are you sick?”
“Probably,” You give up. When Seungmin has his mind set on something, it's difficult to argue with him.
“What do you mean ‘probably?’”
You bite your lower lip and run your free hand through your hair. “It’s nothing,”
“What’s going on?” It's subtle, the way his voice wavers with worry. If you weren't tuned into most of his habits, you would have missed it.
“Seungmin—“ You try to say calmly, wincing in pain as you lean back down against your headrest.
“Don’t try to lie or play it off. Something is wrong,” His voice raises an octave. You're not sure you can remember the last time he even slightly raised his voice at you. Even in a joking manner.
“…Fine." You squeeze your eyes shut, your current position only worsening your pain. "I just haven’t been feeling well lately.”
“What do you mean?”
You pause, contemplating how much you actually want to tell him right now. “My stomach gets upset. It’s fine though, probably just a bug.”
“And it’s causing you to not eat or sleep?”
“It only hurts after I eat. Well, it hurts in general now but if I eat it hurts a lot. Except for pho for some reason. But I can’t eat that all day every day,” You try to sound light and calm so that he doesn't worry more than he already is.
“You said 'now.' How long has it been hurting?”
“A while,” You mumble, playing with the hem of your shirt.
There's more movement in the background. You hear a faint scoff before you hear Seungmin huff as he presses the phone to his ear again.
“Have you gone to your doctor?”
“I called. They can’t see me until next month. But they said they’ll call me if a closer appointment comes.”
“Urgent care?” He suggests.
“They’ll just have me sit in the waiting room for hours and then spend 5 minutes with me before prescribing me antibiotics. Which is good and all but I know that's going to do fuck all if I can't even eat with the pills.”
“If it’s that bad, they’ll prescribe you something else.”
“Unlikely,”
You can practically hear the gears turning in Seungmin's head on the other end while he tries to come up with another solution for you. You're almost certain he's come up with all the same solutions that you have, none with promising enough results.
“What about the emergency room?" He tries again.
“For a stomach bug?” You chuckle, holding your stomach to attempt to control the apparent throbbing your stomach.
“A stomach bug wouldn't last that long. And you're not eating or sleeping. I don't know what else to do." His voice cracks. He's not trying to mask the panic in his voice for your sake anymore. He sounds as scared as you feel inside.
You squeeze your eyes shut again and rub your free hand over it. "Let's say I agree with you taking me to the emergency room. We'll still be there for hours--"
"I'm a pro idol. Plus my mom is a doctor,"
You've never known Seungmin to abuse his privilege as an idol, even at times when he should have. Especially when he should have. The fact that he's even insinuating that he'll use that part of his life if it'll help you is both heartwarming and intimidating.
"Don't involve your mom in this--Look, it's fine. I'm fine."
"It's not--" You hear Seungmin mumble a string of swear words that you're not sure you've heard him utter before.
"Seungmin? Hello?"
The background noise starts up again. This time, you hear Jisung scream singing loudly in the background as Hyunjin laughs. You hear some rustling in the background and finally a zipper. You pick up Chan's concerned voice, low and deep as chaos ensues in the background. You hear Seungmin tell him that he has to go, 'a family emergency' he explains. And then you hear Minho's soft voice as the noise in the background dies down. And then more rustling and zippers before the faint yet familiar jingling of keys.
"Seungmin!" You call out again, hoping he can hear you now that the room is quieter.
You hear a faint, 'one second' from Seungmin before he clears his throat, "I'll be there in about 20 minutes. Get your stuff ready."
Click
He hangs up before you can even try to argue with him that he doesn't need to leave practice to check on you. You let out a long shakey breath as you toss your phone on the bed and let yourself slump over from frustration.
***
"I can't believe you called your mom," You mutter under your breath.
Your arms rest firmly across your chest as you sit up on the examination bed in the emergency room. Seungmin sits at the foot of the bed, watching your every move. Like you would try to bolt if his eyes left you for even a second. You've thought about it.
"If you saw how pale you looked, you would have done the same thing. What did you want me to do?"
He looks so unlike himself. This is the first time you've seen him so disheveled, even after a dance practice. His usually neat hair points in all different directions from him running his hands through it. His windbreaker is zipped all the way up to hide his wrinkly, sweaty t-shirt. His face is darker than it normally is, showcasing whatever is running through his mind.
"Not call your mom!" You whisper. The emergency room beds don't offer you much privacy, only a curtain separating you from other beds. There's been a man screaming in pain in one of the makeshift rooms since you walked in. "I told you specifically not to,"
The sterile stench and bright lights from the room are starting to make your head spin. You feel bad taking up a bed when you know some people need to be examined more than you.
"I'm sorry but if you saw me in the state you're in, trust me, you would be calling anyone who could help. You lost a lot of weight too. I don't think I can even pinch your cheeks without it hurting you."
"You're overreacting," You scoff, rolling your eyes.
"You look like a sickly Victorian child,"
"Seung--"
Swoosh
Seungmin quietly gets up from his spot on the bed and stands next to you, resting his hand on your shoulder. Your doctor from earlier walks back in, nurse behind him this time. Her forced smile does nothing to distract from the dark bags under her eyes. You can tell how exhausted she is just by looking at her. She looks how your brain feels.
"I just finished talking with my attending. We both agree that you may have an ulcer. However, we cannot be sure without further testing. You have a few options but we recommend..."
You started to zone out, relieved that their first suspicion is an ulcer and not something more serious. An ulcer is treatable and the fatality rate is relatively low, based on what you read when you first started feeling sick.
"...admit you."
"Excuse me?" You tilt your head to the side, confused about what you just heard. You feel Seungmin's grip on your shoulder tightens, nails practically digging into your shoulder.
"Like I said, we do have a few other concerns so we believe it's best to admit you while we run a few more tests to be certain." The doctor repeats.
"But you just said that it's most likely an ulcer." You uncross your arms, your hand instinctively reacting for Seungmin. He grabs your hand with his free hand, refusing to let go of your shoulder.
"Yes, but some of the symptoms you're experiencing also align with other ailments so we would like to admit you for a couple of days while we do thorough tests," she explains, flipping through the papers on her clipboard.
You turn to Seungmin, whose face is clamped shut and eyes are fixed on the doctor. He's been doing well, keeping his composure for your sake, but now he looks as pale as you probably do. You try to focus your breathing so that maybe, just maybe, your heart will stop threatening to pound out of your chest. If it does, however, you're in the perfect place.
Seungmin's hand slides down from your shoulder to your back, rubbing soothing circles as he continues to talk to the doctor. You can't hear what he and the doctor are talking about, your ears are acutely aware of the swooshing of the blood from your heart.
You wanted it to be nothing. It's one of the main reasons why you put it off so long, playing it off as common stomach issues so you wouldn't have to go to the doctors and have them find something wrong with you. But it's inevitable now. There is something.
"It'll be okay," Seungmin whispers. Normally, you can read him like a book, but right now, you can't tell if he's reassuring you or himself.
~~~
You stare at the words on your phone, absorbing none of them as music plays loudly from Seungmin's headphones. You can't even register what song is playing right now, your mind too full with thousands of thoughts plaguing every quiet second you have.
Seungmin left you his headphones and phone charger before he left to get you some things from home. He stayed a while, being a quiet yet comforting presence while you got admitted. He sat, holding your hand as a nurse drew your blood, humming softly to distract you for a little bit.
He didn't want to leave. Not at first, but the two of you quickly realized that you couldn't ask anyone to get what you needed from your apartment. Seungmin has the only remaining key and you argued that it would be too much to ask one of the boys to come to the hospital to pick it up, get what you need from your room, and then come back to the hospital. So Seungmin went himself.
You were put into a private room, which you know is probably Seungmin's doing, but right now, you would prefer to be in a shared room. Just for the comfort of knowing that you're not the only person in the room.
Hot tears roll down your face, as your mind plays all the worse possible scenarios like a movie. You can't skip it, each scene is worse than the first, stressing you out more. You rest your head on the TV tray, trying to get your body to stop shaking and the images from popping into your head.
"Y/n?" You feel the cool air rushing to your ears and Seungmin's panicked voice, "What's wrong? Are you in pain?"
He sets down the bags in the chair next to your bed and tries to get you to lift your head so he can see your face.
"N-no. I mean, yeah it hurts, but that's not why I'm crying." You whimper, lifting your head and looking at Seungmin through tears.
You can't see it, how red and swollen Seungmin's eyes are. Even if you did, you know he'd tell you a little white lie about allergies. You hate how this is affecting him. It's one of the reasons why you didn't tell him in the first place. Because you knew he wouldn't be able to do anything to help, no matter how much he wanted to. You don't even want to think how badly he'll suffer if it's something serious.
"It's okay to be scared," Seungmin whispers. The remainder of the sentence lingers in the air between the two of you. Unspoken but understood.
It's okay to be scared. I am too.
"What if it's something serious? And I waited too long and,"
Another unfinished sentence that doesn't need to be completed for the two of you to understand, this one heavier than the last. Its weight quickly soaking up all the oxygen and light in the room, making it hard to breathe. Or maybe it's whatever has been slowly killing you from the inside finally putting you out of your misery.
"Maybe it's a parasite," Seungmin suggests, his normally steady voice breaking. You finally look up to face your boyfriend. You're bet with the top of his head as he's turned away from you, looking at the ceiling. His hair is neater than it was before, still slightly wet. He's now wearing a light grey hoodie with matching sweatpants.
"That's disgusting," You sniffle, a smile smile appearing on your face.
Seungmin, still not looking at you, lets out a loud and long sigh. "But you're smiling, right?"
"Because you're an idiot,"
"A smile is a smile. I'll take it."
Seungmin tilts his head down and rubs his sleeve-covered hands over his face before turning his attention to you. His eyes are glassy and red. Your heart drops to the pit of your stomach at the sight of him.
"It'll be okay," You whisper, taking Seungmin's hand in yours. It's more for your comfort than his.
"Whatever it is, I'll be here. Okay?" Seungmin says loudly, squeezing your hand tightly. "So lay your burdens on me,"
"I can't ask you to do that. You're getting ready for a comeback--"
"You think I would be able to focus on that if you're...if something is wrong with you?"
"I've seen you seen you separate Kim Seungmin the idol from Kim Seungmin my boyfriend."
"Yeah, when we're having a fight or something. But not for things like this. I already talked to Chan hyung. I didn't tell him everything, but he understands that you need me right now."
"Seungmin..." Your voice falters, any argument you could think of dies in your throat.
But he's right, you do need him. You've been shouldering the burden of your pain alone for too long, you're not sure how much longer you can last. He was gone for one hour and you completely fell apart. And that was just at the thought that it might be something serious.
"I have to call my parents," You breathe, calming down a little bit.
"I can help you with that," Seungmin replies softly.
"And I need to let my boss know I can't come in."
"I'll help with that too,"
"...But right now, I kinda just want to lay down with you,"
"I can do that too," Seungmin gently climbs into the hospital bed next to you, carefully watching the IV in your hand.
Once he's settled, he pulls your head down onto his chest. You freeze for a moment. It's not usual for Seungmin to initiate physical contact like this. Especially when a nurse can walk in at any moment. But the slight tremble of his body and the pounding in his chest let you know that he probably needs this more than you, so you relax into his touch.
"I love you, Y/n," He mumbles out, just like he did the first time he said it.
"I love you too, Seungmin," You breathe into his chest, gripping the fabric of his hoodie.
"I'm here," He says loudly this time. "It'll be okay,"
"I know,"
Tumblr media
Buy me a coffee?
Permanent Taglist (closed)
Red means that it wouldn't let me tag you (either at all or properly)
@amyysfics @berryblog @jaydebow @junebug032 @boiohboii
@heistheavatar @lieslab @rainbae-anon @k-cock @hamburgers101
@mrswolfiechan @soulboundauthor @weird-bookworm @thisisnotjacinta @seungmyynie
@halesandy @kpopsstuffs @honeydew93 @beebee18 @stay278
@jaiuneamesolitaiire @babrieeee @brain-empty-only-draken @tenmii @blueforte
@jihanlovic @felixglow  @nuronhe @soonyoungblr @phtogravi
@jiisungllvr @puppyminnnie
327 notes · View notes
biniminisblog · 4 months
Text
under the mistletoe | hwang hyunjin one shot
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
pairing: hwang hyunjin x fem!reader
synopsis: the three times hyunjin wanted to confess, and the one time you did.
genre: friends to lovers, slight angst, fluff
word count: 3.2k
a/n: MERRY CHRISTMAS ‼️🎄🎄 as promised i managed to finish this just in time yay!! hope you guys like it and consider reblogging/sharing your thoughts. have a great day everyone!
Tumblr media
one.
this is it. hyunjin was going to confess. after days of rehearsing with jeongin— who played you surprisingly well, it was almost weird— he was finally going to tell you how he feels.
despite the practice, hyunjin could feel his palms starting to sweat, he was becoming fidgety all of a sudden. it was the third of december, just a few weeks before christmas, and he had asked you to meet up at his place so you both could continue your tradition of watching cheesy romance movies. he had everything set up, from blankets and pillows to your favourite food and drinks. it was all perfect and romantic, so he can’t back out now!
regardless of his anxiety-inducing thoughts, he waits for you, and as his watch reaches seven pm, he hears his doorbell ring. what greets him was a bright grin plastered on your face. you were wearing your favourite sweater— which was technically his but you stole it from him— with your hair tied into a half ponytail. he didn’t think you could get even more beautiful. however, time and time again you seem to prove him wrong.
hyunjin didn’t realise he was staring intently until you were waving a hand at his face to somehow snap him from his thoughts. he blinks twice before clearing his throat, reluctantly looking away from you and towards the food instead.
“you okay there, hyun?” that damn nickname will be the death of him, seriously. he only nodded his head, giving you a smile which seems to reassure you enough. once the both of you are seated on the couch, you immediately grab one of the cookies on top of the coffee table, taking a bite of it and humming in satisfaction.
“this is so good, hyun! did you make it?” you turn to look at him, your voice muffled by the food in your mouth and he finds you adorable with your cheeks puffed out.
“yeah, felix helped me— oh, and i made sure it wasn’t too sweet since i know you can’t handle too much.”
“you remembered?” your eyes seem to sparkle at his thoughtful action, and if all it takes for you to look at him like that was a simple gesture, then he’ll basically do anything for you. god, he’s so whipped he can't even deny it anymore.
“of course i remember, you’re my friend.” or maybe something more. hopefully, if he doesn’t chicken out.
“that’s so sweet of you! you’re like— the perfect man. i could literally kiss you right now.” you gush, but then widen your eyes when you realise what you just said. you glance at hyunjin, only to see his face turn pink, suddenly becoming shy at your claim. although he was happy you thought of him like that, he senses that you were slightly uncomfortable, so he decides to change the tone.
“just for that? you should raise your standards yn, or else you’ll end up with a sleazy man.” hyunjin teases, earning a cute pout from you. he feels relief wash over him when he sees you no longer felt uneasy, as well as a flutter in his heart at your expression.
“oh hush. don’t insult my standards, you’re basically insulting minho.”
oh. hyunjin’s smile drops. he tries to regain his composure, scratching his neck to distract himself, and grabbing one of the sandwiches he made for you. still, it was hard to grasp the information he just discovered, which was basically a slap to his face.
“so you like… minho hyung?” you shrug, not being able to look him in the eye as you finish your cookie. you can’t even look at him directly, do you like him that much?
“i mean he’s definitely a great guy, so i guess i do like him a little.” you admit, tracing circles on the pillow beside you, and hyunjin can feel his heart clench in pain.
the atmosphere changed after your confession. you and hyunjin still exchanged conversation normally, but it was like there was a wall between you now, contrasting to the fact that you were only inches apart from each other. oh well, so much for confessing.
two.
“why is he staring at me like that?” minho raises an eyebrow, eyeing hyunjin who has been glaring daggers at him for the past two minutes.
jeongin shrugs and shakes his head at his hyung’s childishness. “hyunjin hyung’s just being an idiot again.”
he doesn’t argue with that because he was being an idiot, getting jealous over something as mundane as your ideal type. it’s not like you guys are dating or anything, so it shouldn’t be a problem. that still doesn’t stop the green monster from coming out as he watches minho look effortlessly attractive under the horrid lighting of their shared apartment.
“well can’t he be an idiot somewhere else? i’m trying to decorate here.” hyunjin finally stops glaring at him, and instead opts to go back to his sketchpad, looking over at all the portraits he sketched of you.
sighing internally, he wonders if he’ll ever be able to confess to you, even if he was given the chance. hyunjin sulks in his seat, prompting jeongin to sigh in frustration. he decides to be a good friend today and nudges his shoulder, causing hyunjin to look up, revealing his pout and furrowed eyebrows.
“what do you want.” he deadpans. jeongin closes hyunjin’s sketchpad and gives him a look of annoyance. “listen, if you really liked yn then minho hyung being her ideal type shouldn’t stop you from telling her.”
minho takes a glance at hyunjin and points a finger to his chest. “i’m her ideal type? no wonder why you’re sulking.” he snorts out before going back to placing lights on their christmas tree.
although minho doesn’t comment much on it, hyunjin knows that information is going to spread in the groupchat later on, and he grimaces as he imagines all the teasing from them.
jeongin seems to realise this as well because he’s quick to cheer him up. “don’t listen to him, hyung! i mean just because minho hyung is her ideal type doesn’t mean you aren’t, right?”
now that he thinks about it, jeongin might be right. suddenly, a smile starts to grow on hyunjin’s face.
“then there’s still a chance she might like me back?”
“definitely! don’t lose hope hyung.” ever the supportive younger brother, jeongin gives hyunjin a pat on the shoulder while minho only scrunches his nose in response.
“you should ask her out to the party chan’s going to hold on the 25th.” he suggests and hyunjin lights up at that idea. feeling a rush of adrenaline, he abruptly stands up, causing jeongin to let out a squeak and minho to flinch in shock.
“i need to find yn.”
“wha— you’re going to ask her out now!? hyunjin, wait—!” and he’s gone. jeongin hears the door click shut and he goes over to minho, not even bothering to catch up with the lovesick boy anymore.
“didn’t he mention that yn’s on a family trip right now so she can’t contact him?” jeongin nods in confirmation as he helps place christmas balls on the tree, which causes minho to facepalm at their friend’s stupidity.
“i guess love really makes you dumber.”
three.
so the second time didn’t work out, but that was totally hyunjin’s fault. he forgot you would be away for a few days, being too excited to finally confess the feelings he’d been harbouring for you for a long time now.
however, it’s already the 20th of december, and you’re finally back. he’s sure not not to mess this up. he decided not to plan anything, opting to just say it.
as he arrived at your place, there was no denying the rush of nerves flowing within him. he had thought about just bolting out of there, and he almost did, but he knew that if it wasn’t now, then it was never.
hyunjin lets out a huff and rings your doorbell, trying to relax by focusing on the peephole of your door. this proves to be ineffective because the moment the door opened, he immediately made eye cantact with your beaming face.
“hyun! i didn’t know you were coming, is there something you need?” you step aside to let him in and he cautiously walks past you to sit on your sofa. trying to calm down his heart, he sees you moving over to sit next to him.
should he just say it now?
“nothing, really. i just wanted to see you.” he settles on saying that instead. you’re probably surprised to see him since he should be busy during this time of the year, so he’s playing it safe for now. however, once he takes a peek to see your reaction, it gives him a boost of confidence when he notices the pretty shade of pink adorning your cheeks.
“i was only gone for a few days.” you mumble out, but you don’t hide the smile that forms on your lips.
“few says too many.” hyunjin jokes. he’s feeling a little more bold now, so he slowly scoots a little closer to you until it feels as if you are almost only a hair away.
you don’t seem to mind the proximity, in fact, it’s like you moved even closer. or maybe hyunjin was being delusional, either way it still makes him giddy.
“well since you’re here i have something to tell you.”
“really? what is it?” this is probably the perfect time to mention that he has something to say too. “oh actually i just remembered i have to tell you something too.”
“then do you want to go first?” you tilt your head cutely while waiting for his answer and hyunjin only shakes his head no, gesturing for you to go ahead.
“do you remember how i said minho was my ideal type?” hyunjin nods slowly, not liking the way this was going.
“well i actually asked him out just yesterday.” you gauge his expression, watching as hyunjin starts to process your words. his eyes widen, mouth hanging agape, and you can’t tell if it’s from shock or disappointment.
“th-that’s—uhm,” hyunjin can’t even finish what he was trying to say, and he can feel his heart literally being ripped from his chest. is this god’s way of telling him that you would never be his?
“so yeah…” you can feel the awkward tension rise so you decide to shift the conversation. “what was it that you wanted to tell me?”
hyunjin suddenly remembers why he’s here, and he looks up to find you gazing at him expectantly with a warm smile on your face. if it was before all this, he would have melted at the sight, but now all he feels is the tight clench around his chest. it’s almost suffocating, he can’t even find it in himself to speak. the only thing he can do is leave, and so he does.
“hyunjin— wait, where are you going?”
“i’m sorry i have to go.” he manages to utter that out before he’s outside, closing the door shut and not looking back, afraid he might breakdown if he even glances at your face.
that’s it. he’ll never try to confess again.
four.
“hyung come on~” jeongin whines as he tries to drag hyunjin out of his bed by pulling his forearm.
“no! i don’t want to see the love of my life and the person who betrayed me being all lovey dovey.” he wiggles out of jeongin’s grasp and proceeds to pull his duvet cover over his head.
“ugh you’re so dramatic— you’ve been cooped up in your room for five days now! are you really going to let some girl ruin christmas for you?”
this gets hyunjin to push the covers off of him and sit up straight, shooting daggers at the younger boy.
“yn is not just some girl, she’s my best friend who i’ve been secretly in love with for the better part of my life. she’s someone i cherish and care for the most, and i’m not going to let you reduce her as just some girl.” hyunjin lets out a huff, making the long strands of blond hair covering his face move.
jeongin raises his hands up in surrender. a silent air filled the room before it was broken by minho’s slow, sarcastic clap.
“why don’t you say that again but to yn this time?” minho steps aside to let you enter the room and hyunjin lets out an audible gasp. he suddenly feels self conscious as you move closer to his bed.
“wh-what are you guys doing here? shouldn’t you be at chan’s party?” he focuses his attention on minho only to avoid facing you, his heart beating a mile a minute.
“we would’ve been if you weren’t a sulking idiot.” minho walks over to grab jeongin and heads towards the door.
“i made yn come over since i know you’d basically rot in your room until new year. now make out!” he shuts the door behind but not before you hear jeongin follow up with a ‘you mean make up?’, leaving only you and hyunjin inside.
minho’s obvious teasing left both of you feeling flustered, but decided not to comment on it.
“hyunjin.” you start, and for the first time since you arrived, he meets your eyes, which almost seemed red. were you crying? did he make you cry? or was it minho? either way he has to know why.
“were you crying? did someone make you cry? tell me who so i can beat them—”
a loud ‘umph’ escapes hyunjin’s mouth as you unexpectedly lunge towards him with a hug. he was so surprised he couldn’t even process what was happening in the moment. he felt himself go limp in your grasp, inhaling your perfume which had always intoxicated him.
is this what heaven feels like? hyunjin’s pretty sure it is.
when you pulled away—in that moment hyunjin suddenly felt a cold shiver run down his spine— he came face to face with your glossy eyes.
“you supid idiot, you’re the one who made me cry— and i’m in love with you too!” you confess.
and just like that, hyunjin’s whole world was turned upside down.
“wha—but i thought you and minho…?” you shake your head in response.
“i thought you didn’t like me back, but minho told me you did. i didn’t believe him though so he told me to tell you i asked him out to see your reaction. i didn’t think you’d walk out on me so i thought you hated me…” you mumble out the last words, looking down at your hands as you fiddle with them. now that you’ve reflected back on your actions, it was totally a stupid idea and you should’ve just told him how you felt then.
hyunjin was shocked at this revelation. so this was all minho’s idea!? he’s honestly not sure if he should thank him or cuss him out, although he feels it's safe to do the former if he doesn’t want tissues in his mouth again.
“i could never hate you, yn. not even if you told me you murdered someone.” this manages to make you giggle, to which it makes hyunjin feel the butterflies roaming around his stomach, just like before.
“i actually tried confessing, three times to be more specific.” he admits, causing you to shift your attention to him as a dramatic gasp leaves your lips.
“so we’re both idiots.” although it was meant to be an insult, hyunjin finds it endearing to see you look so distraught about it.
he reaches out to tuck a stray hair behind your ear amd swiftly kiss you on the cheek. you were stunned for a second, almost in a trance, but luckily you snap out of it and retaliate with a kiss of your own. you both end up giggling, feeling drunk on each other’s kisses as you take turns planting soft pecks on the other’s face.
hyunjin can’t believe he’s deprived humself of this pure bliss for years now, he’s definitely never letting you go—
“hey, are you guys going to come out there or what? we’re still going to chan’s party, you know.”
like glass shattering, minho breaks the moment hyunjin has been waiting for his whole life as he hears his older friend’s annoying voice from outside the room. you to pull away from each other, albeit reluctantly.
you still have lovesick grins plastered on, maintaining eye contact as you stand up from the bed and interlock your fingers with hyunjin.
“i don’t think i’ve ever been this happy since that one time we spontaneously went on a trip to japan.” you say while playing with hyunjin’s fingers.
“i don’t think i’ve ever been this happy ever.”
“oh stop, you’re lying.” you whine but end up covering your face with hyunjin’s shirt and he takes this opportunity to slide his arms around you, slowly swaying back and forth.
“believe what you want to believe, love.” the nickname slips out naturally and you look up, a pink tint adorning your cheeks. you stand on your tippy toes to plant another kiss on hyunjin’s nose this time.
“let’s go? i feel like minho’s going to slam the door open and kick us out himself any moment now.” you agree with his statement and go back to locking fingers before heading out towards hyunjin’s bedroom door.
however as you open it, you don’t expect to see evergreen leaves hanging atop both of your heads.
jeongin dangles the plant mischievously. “you guys going to kiss or what?”
you face hyunjin, only to find that he has already been looking at you this whole time, plump pink lips puckered playfully with his eyes closed. you laugh, caressing his cheek before leaning in to leave a soft, long kiss on his lips.
“ok i think that’s enough.” minho manages to pull you away from each other, making hyunjin narrow his eyes at him.
“no i don’t think so, i’ve waited too long for this!” hyunjin whines, proceeding to latch himself to your side. you only shake your head, smile tugging your lips at your boyfriend’s silliness. god, you could get used to this.
“and you have all the time in the world now that you’re together, now let’s go!”
“jeongin’s got a point. so how about you let me have yn tonight? i am her type after all, isn’t that right, yn?”
minho’s loud cackle resonates the room when hyunjin hurriedly tries to cover your eyes to prevent you from looking at minho.
jeongin, who’s had enough if his older hyung’s shenanigans, leaves the apartment.
it took about thirty minutes before you actually head to the party, but not without another shared secret kiss between hyunjin and you, his girlfriend, this time without a mistletoe.
“merry christmas, hyunjin.” you whisper between your kisses.
“merry christmas, yn.” despite the cold weather, everything felt so warm. you were warm, and he never wants to let you go.
“i love you.”
after three failed attempts, he can now say for sure that the confession was a success.
309 notes · View notes
ashtxrie · 23 days
Text
not the coughing disease! (jungwon)
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
PAIR. non-idol!jungwon x gn!reader GENRE. fluff, established relationship, reader is sick and jungwon is doing his absolute most to help you recover WORD COUNT. 1.1k WARNINGS. none :) NOTES. finally wrote about the loml i love jungwon IN WHICH: you? sick and miserable? under jungwon's watch? impossible.
the door to your room creaks open, and yang jungwon shivers as he peeks inside, holding something behind his back. he looks around the room, his eyes taking in the empty water bottles stacked around your armoire, then to the open window allowing frigid air to breeze inside. 
“it’s freezing,” he says absent-mindedly, unsure of what to do first. he obliges with running over to sit on the side of your bed, staring at you with kind eyes.
“what’re you doing in here?” your voice is hoarse as you speak, and you cough suddenly. you jerk your head to the side, leaning up as your chest contracts. “you can’t be in here won, you’re going to get sick—“
jungwon smiles at you with the same soft expression, putting his hands on your shoulders and pushing you back down. “stay here, you’re sick.” he sniffs, then looks around, amused. “the healing energy in your room is all wrong.” 
you give him a questioning look before sniffling. "since when were you into that kind of stuff?"
he ignores you as he glances at the cups, the empty bowls, and the tissues strewn along your floor. “[name], that’s disgusting.” he laughs, then grins. “i’m going to help you get better, you’ll see.” 
you sigh, reaching half-heartedly to shove him out. he leans to the side, nimbly dodging your hand. “i’m going to make you the best soup you’ve ever had, just like how jay hyung taught me”
you sigh, stuffing your pillow over your face. “you’re making it really hard for me to hide my feelings right now.” the pillow muffles your voice and jungwon starts to hum a melody he came up with in the kitchen, pots clattering against the stove and the fridge door opening and closing again. you catch him singing a little song about defeating the viruses in your body with the "absolutely amazing scrumptious show-stopping soup" he's making, laughing as he rhymes "fighting disease" with "i'll kick them with my feet".
soon enough, something wafts into your room, and it is strong enough, good enough, for even you to smell with your congested nose and throat that aches when you take in a breath. 
jungwon nudges the door open with the tip of his foot, stepping inside and carrying a tray with two bowls of soup. he places it on the desk beside your bed, then frowns as he remembers the state of your room.
he tsks, the nerve of him, and laughs as you struggle to sit up.  
“stop, stop—“ he says in between laughs, “let me help you.” he grabs a pillow that had fallen to the floor, then gently eases it behind your head, making it easier for you to sit up. 
he reaches for the first bowl of soup and gives it to you, and you smile up at him, taking a sip of the broth.
it’s chicken soup, your favorite. and like usual, jungwon is right, and soup does taste especially good when you’re sick. 
you turn to thank him, but he’s already working on your room, his back turned to you as he picks up the tissues from the ground and throws them one by one into the waste bin near the corner of your closet.
"this one's for you," he teases, turning toward your face as he aims the last tissue at the trash can from your bed. "i'm doing intense projectile motion physics calculations right now, jake taught me."
the tissue lands in its target in a perfect arc, leaving the two of you yelling and pointing at the successful landing in equal shock. jungwon was sure that this was a sign that physics was his calling. you insisted that he just got lucky.
with the ground now clean, he gathers the various cups ("i'll be right back!") and retreats into the kitchen, the faucet turning on as he washes the rest of your dishes and sets them out to dry. 
when he returns, he looks momentarily satisfied, and sits back on the corner of your bed, reaching for the second bowl of soup.
“i still can’t believe you didn’t tell me.” he looks at you as he eats, his brown eyes looking into yours.
you frown. “how did you find out?” 
jungwon straightens. “you left my message on delivered. right after i said "i love you" too. and you never do that!”
you smile sheepishly. “oh. that must have been when i was sleeping... i'm sorry wonie.” you hold his hand in yours, interlacing your fingers. "but that means i can just say it now right? i love you too, jungwon."
jungwon smiles, and a hint of adoration flickers in his eyes. “i figured you weren’t feeling well, i mean, either that or i had done some horrible offense in the past 24 hours— so i just dropped by to check on you anyway” his eyes sparkle, and he stands up. "you didn't leave your boyfriend on seen. i was about to septuple-text you, damn whatever those double-texting rules say."
you’re about to respond, but you cough from your attempt to laugh.  you hurry to set your bowl on the side of the desk and throw the covers aside, rushing over to the bathroom. 
jungwon can hear your coughing growing worse as you spit out phlegm, and he sighs, twisting his lips into a flat line. he looks at the window, sighing as he sees it open, and reaches to pull it shut. the glass is misty and speckled with raindrops, and he remembers just how cold it is outside. 
when your return, jungwon smiles at you holding a large, fluffy blanket. he throws it over your form as you lay back down, and he reaches for your phone to choose his favorite playlist. 
“won, put that down.”
he looks up at you, confused.
“my phone has germs. you’ll get sick.”
jungwon shrugs, continuing to browse through your music library.  his finger rests on the playlist with a photo of the two of you, and he clicks on it.  
“i remember this one,” he says with a huge smile on his face. “remember we made it together last year?”
you nod, already fighting away drowsiness.
the music fills your room, and you sigh, happy. jungwon is here, the music is soft and beautiful, and you’re happier than you’ve been in a long time. 
“thank you,” you finally breathe out, letting your eyes flutter shut as you doze off. "i love you so much."
when jungwon is sure you’ve fallen asleep, he reaches to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear.
“bye, [name]. i love you more.” 
he stands up, softly closing the door behind him. 
Tumblr media
272 notes · View notes
hwangism143 · 12 days
Text
𓆩♡𓆪 nicknames. 𓆩♡𓆪
hyung line.
han jisung.
"good morning my pookie wookie snuffle bear."
you look at jisung in confusion, wondering what the hell just came out of jisung's mouth. he was hunched over his cereal when he said, "oh. i couldn't think of one nickname, so i decided to give you them all!"
soon, what seemed like an irritation, became another thing for you to look forward to during your day. you woke up every morning wondering what crazy nickname jisung was going to give you the next day.
the prize however, went to 'better than felix's brownies and any lemon meringue pie.' you really regretted introducing jisung to baking reality tv.
"you do-" jisung hesitated, "you do like these nicknames, right? like they don't annoy you?"
"no," you giggle, "they don't."
placing your forehead on jisung's, you ease his tensions by saying, "i like them. but not as much as i like you."
lee felix.
felix paced around in agitation. "okay, now i feel bad," you whined, "i didn't even put this much thought into a nickname for you. everyone called you sunshine, so i did too!"
"aw, don't feel bad," felix called out in his restless stupor.
you walk over to him and wrap your arms around his waist, resting your chin on his shoulder. initially, he is tense until he relaxes against you and lets out a sigh.
"hey," you say softly, "it's ok."
"no," replies felix, "it's not. it's like a relationship rite of passage."
you roll your eyes at him. "felix. you help me grow and bring out the best in me. that's proof enough of you love. you don't need a nickname to show it as well."
but felix is lost in thought. he mutters something under his breath and he turns to face you, visibly lighting up.
"that's it! i'm sunshine and i help you grow, so that means that you're my..."
you initiate a little drumroll with your feet.
"sunflower!" he finishes triumphantly.
kim seungmin.
"we need to talk."
your heart sunk into your stomach the moment he voiced those four words. nothing ever good came from a conversation succeeding that ill-fated sentence.
"what is it," you ask, hoping he doesn't notice the nervousness in your voice.
"we have to talk about the terms and conditions of our relationship."
"we had a contract?" you ask in confusion.
seungmin looks at you with a glint of mischief in his eyes, "an unspoken one, yes. as per what's prescribed, i need to have a nickname for you. i do not, however, have a nickname for you."
relief washes over you, soon replaced by a little bit of exasperation. who on earth would start a conversation so simple with a sentence so daunting? kim seungmin, that's who.
ah, you were in love.
"well," you ask promptly, "what's my nickname?"
"i have thought a lot and," seungmin smirked, "you don't deserve one."
"hey," you laugh, "that's not fair!"
"but you love me either way, sweetheart."
yang jeongin.
"i have made an extremely important decision," jeongin announced promptly. he walked over to you and sat down, a wide smile adorning his face.
"innie, you said that yesterday when you finally decided between glazed or barbecued chicken after pondering over it for twenty minutes," you reply endearingly. jeongin had a bit of a... indecisiveness problem.
"but, honey, really," a smirk started to play on his lips.
"honey? that's new," you ask in confusion. the way he said it with a low tone made warmth (and ungodly thoughts) seep into your body.
"exactly, yeobo," he said, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you into his chest.
"so. what was the decision," you're beginning to get slightly impatient, your curiosity getting the best of you.
"from now onwards," he haughtily proclaims, "you are no longer to be referred to as y/n. you are now christened as honey or yeobo, depending on my mood."
you laugh into his chest, mocking his extremely poor british accent and blushing at his newfound names for you.
261 notes · View notes
stormyjisung · 8 months
Text
"So when did you know it was love?"
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Members. Skz hyung line (+hyunjin)
Synopsis. Asking them about the time when they'd fallen for you entirely
A/n. I woke up missing ji and decided to write something for skiz, it's been a long time since I've written for them anyway. I was watching a movie yesterday (more like analysing the poster) and the tagline said, 'so when do you know it's love?' And my writer brain went wee woo 🚨.
Tumblr media
Bang chan
"so when did you know it was love?"
The question caught chan off guard, eyes shifting from his phone to your face, eyebrows quirked up in amusement, "where's this coming from?"
Rolling onto your stomach you groaned, "I don't know, chan, it just randomly popped up"
A bubble of laughter left his lips, "well to answer your question, I think it was our last semester at uni? I don't really remember the setting love, but I do remember that I was having a bad day. That paired with a raging downpour pushed me over the edge and I called you, crying, definitely not one of my best moments" chan paused to shake his head, "you helped calm me down and said, 'I'll be right there' and before I could ask what you meant you hung up"
"And before I knew it, you turned up at the library soaked to the bone. You handed me my umbrella and gave me the biggest, warmest hug someone had ever given me, despite the fact that you were freezing,
We'd already been dating for a few months, and you'd stolen my heart countless amount of times but it was at that moment I knew you'd stolen my heart from me forever"
Your cheeks felt hot, chan had always been a man of many words but to hear him voice out the moment he fell in love with you word by word felt nothing short of ethereal.
"But I do wonder, why did you turn up looking like a wet dog when you had an umbrella with you?"
Shrieks of embarrassment and laughter filled the atmosphere, love seeping into your bones even deeper.
Tumblr media
Minho
"when did you know it was love?"
You saw minho's hand pause midway while petting dori, "is this one of those tiktok thingies where go around asking your partner if they'd love you if you were a worm?"
"What- no! I was genuinely curious" you whined as minho let dori down, placing a finger on his chin he pondered.
"Honestly?"
"Yeah!" You leaned forward excitedly.
"It was that time when you messed up a party's dress code and showed up wearing a chicken onesie."
"Fuck off" you replied, kicking a pillow at his face as he cackled, "No but how does one mess up that bad?"
Faux disappointment seeped into your features causing minho to break, "okay fine. But you dare not make fun of me or I'll set birds loose on you"
"You wouldn't dare" you gasped, "try me" Came his reply.
"It was late September, when we'd just been dating for a few months and when my self confidence was at an all time low. I remember you'd been begging me to show you one of my choreos until I finally agreed."
"Oh! I do remember it, and when the day arrived you made every excuse under the sun to not show me the choreography!"
"Yeah, because I've always been a little bit of a workaholic and a perfectionist and all the girls I've dated before would ask me to stop working or 'take a break',
nothing wrong with their concern but it just got tiring since I geninunely loved dancing, but then that day when I showed you my choreography, you sat there starry eyed; watching my moves like a hawk and your mouth left partially open as if me dancing was the single most enchanting thing you'd ever seen."
"It was!" you replied in a heartbeat, not missing the way his ears turned red instantaneously, "-anyway, then I told you I wanted to work some more on the choreography before I could come home and you said 'well, let's work together!' And started giving me all these ideas even when you had two left feet yourself"
You would've retorted with a 'hey!' Had it not been the soft gaze in his eyes. You knew minho loved you, it showed in the way he'd tone down his teasing once in a while and remind you that he still loved you.
But after this, you doubt any insecurity would ever cross your mind.
Tumblr media
Changbin
"when did you know it was love, bin?"
Changbin almost dropped the plate he was holding, caught utterly off guard by a question he most certainly had the answer to yet didn't trust his words enough, "what do you mean, babe?"
"When did you realize that you were in love with me?"
"I fall for you every day." He deadpanned
"Yeah- but, like, when was the first time?" you asked flustered by his prompt reply.
"You're cute" He giggled, ruffling your hair as his eyes shone with admiration, "I think it was when we had our first serious disagreement? The first time the rose colored glasses shattered and we could see ourselves for who we truly were"
"You said something along the lines of, 'I'd understand if you left right now' and it was the first time in my twenty one years of life that I'd experienced true heartbreak. And it was also the moment when I realized no matter how many fights we had or will inevitably have in the future, I'd never want to walk out on you or us"
He ended his little monologue by peppering sweet butterfly kisses on your forehead, "I'll always love you" He whispered between the kisses.
The orange hues of the setting sun illuminated the two soul mates in that room who failed to realize that their souls were always meant to love each other, maybe the setting sun knew their story for it smiled as it set across the horizon.
Tumblr media
Hyunjin
"when did you know it was love?" You asked hyunjin as he raked his fingers through your hair gently, a low hum escaping him
"When did I know I'd fallen for you entirely?" He confirmed to which you gently nodded your head, the serene atmosphere felt unreal with you laying on his chest and him alternating between patting your head and softly brushing your hair
"That's a question that doesn't really have a definite answer, love"
You allowed a beat of silence to pass by before you spoke up, "what do you mean?"
"Falling in love with you wasn't a spur of the moment... it was rather an entire journey.
From the moment we met to right now, it's been one hell of a ride. We've seen seasons, weather and people change. We've seen each other change for the better, I've see you through your good, your bad and your ugly" He paused to let his eyes roam all over your face as if memorizing every miniscule detail
"But despite all of that, I wanted you. I wanted you every waking moment of my life, I wanted you on the days you were too sad to even get up, I wanted you on the days you were cranky and moody, I wanted you on the days you'd blow up on me, I wanted you, I want you.
And when you want someone like that, above their flaws, imperfections and blemishes I think it's fair enough to declare it as love"
Hyunjin was always a romantic, never failing to make you feel loved and cherished and even after years of dating him, he still managed to take your breath away. He talked about loving you as if it was the most natural thing for him to do, as if loving you was easy.
And that terrified you because hyunjin was just as easy to fall for, if not more.
Tumblr media
Reblog to show your appreciation !
I love how I post once a week but am chronically online, tee hee.
416 notes · View notes
nobodys-saviour · 1 month
Text
[idol au headcanons because i can and no one can stop me]
xavier always steals people's food. zayne had to make increasingly intricate locks for his sweets. xavier gets them easily
xavier was supposed to be the leader but he highkey just... doesn't care much (ie he lets the members do whatever they want) so he was a no go
leader caleb is weak to flattery. "i'm tired, we can just get take out instead of me cooking" "but hyuuuuung!" "you're older than me stop calling me hyung :/" "but your chicken is the best !! 🥺" "....... FINE"
caleb and rafayel are the noisiest duo
rafayel randomly belts out songs a lot
long limbed and tall, caleb is quite the looker, but when he's dancing, he doesn't know what to do with them. the members make fun of him for it
every time xavier tries to cook every single member freaks out and have to play distract the grandpa
they do fondly call xavier grandpa
zayne had the unfortunate rep of being cold and intimidating, but the behind the scenes/series where they just follow a day in the life of the group made everyone fall for him
typically zayne is the first one there when any member needs help. all 3 of them love him for that
130 notes · View notes
makeitmingi · 4 months
Text
The Cat and Dog Game [Chapter 6]
Tumblr media
Genre: Romance, Fluff, Comedy
Pairing: Yunho x Reader (y/n)
Characters: Chef!Reader, RestaurantOwner!Yunho, MaitreD!Hongjoong, Waiter!Yeosang, Waiter!San, Waiter!Mingi, SousChef!Seonghwa, SousChef!Wooyoung, PrepChef!Jongho
Summary: Yunho's dream was to open and run his own restaurant. But he doesn't know anything when it comes to cooking. Until you came along and accepted the job, bringing with you a small crew. How will the black cat tame the energetic golden retriever?
Word count: 3.2K
"Where's (y/n)? Did she have dinner?" San asked first.
"Oh, she's just taking a breather. Hwa hyung already kept a portion of food for her." Wooyoung waving him off, taking another bite of his own food.
"Is she okay?" Mingi asked.
"Yeah, don't worry about her." Jongho replied. Well, if your friends were saying not to worry, who was Yunho to worry? Why was he even worrying? It's the guilt he felt from his comment before dinner service. You just started working together and he didn't want to cause any bad blood on Day 1.
"Hey." You entered the kitchen, your hands tucked into the pockets of your jeans. Yunho's head perked up at your voice. Your nose and cheeks were slightly red.
"Yah, did you not wear a jacket out?" Seonghwa frowned, leaving his food and coming over to you.
"I'm fine, Hwa." You leaned away from him before he could touch your face.
"You're going to get sick. Come, have your dinner before we start prep." Seonghwa led you over to where the group was. You opened your mouth to say something but Seonghwa shot you a look.
"Thanks for the food." You mumbled and took a bite, although everyone could sense your reluctancy.
"So, how was the dinner service?" You asked.
"It was good. The customers love the food, the feedback was all good." Hongjoong smiled, giving all of you a thumbs up. Wooyoung and Jongho hi fived.
"They liked the roast chicken, infusing western and Korean flavours. The cioppino was liked as well, reminded them of a non-spicy haemul jjigae." Yeosang added. Seonghwa wrapped an arm around you, patting your back as you smiled at each other.
"And a lot of people ordered one dessert each, they like the Western and Korean option." San grinned.
"Finally, Mr Owner, any words of wisdom?" Mingi grinned, drawing all attention on the taller male who had been silent so far.
"Uh... Well, I guess thank you to everyone here. I would say the first day of this place was a huge success, more than I'd ever imagine." He smiled nervously.
"The people like the food, they like the options of Korean flavours and Western flavours, even in combination. Even for the desserts. I think we should continue like we did today." He finished.
"We will try to make dishes that incorporate more Korean flavours, of course." You nodded.
"You're not mad?" Yunho winced, realising he said that out loud when it was meant to be an internal question.
"Why would I be mad?" You blinked in genuine confusion.
"Because of what I said earlier about the food possibly being too fancy. I was afraid that it was offensive or something. I think you all cook amazing, your skills are definitely more than I could ever imagine having, and the food is 100! It's just that this is my first time doing this and I'm afraid and nervous." He blurted.
"Yunho. None of us took what you said personally or to heart. You're the owner and our boss, we follow your direction. I'm personally grateful you were honest with us." You raised an eyebrow.
"Really?"
"Told you." Mingi slapped Yunho's shoulder.
"There's nothing to be worried about. Trust us, we have faced worse insults and criticisms from others before." Jongho laughed.
"Told you." Yeosang mimicked Mingi and slapped Yunho's other shoulder, making Yunho shove his friends away for slapping him with a scowl on his face.
"Please be honest with us. We always look for improvements and ways to be better." Seonghwa smiled.
"We're tougher than you think." You chuckled. Yunho blushed, feeling a little immature now and he felt like he just embarrassed himself in front of you. You noticed how his ears had turned bright red as he looked away with a small pout.
"Alright! We need to start preparing so if you aren't going to help, please step aside." Wooyoung put his hands together with a big smile. Hongjoong and San helped do the remaining dishes.
"Wait, stop. Don't go." You stopped the others mid step. They all froze, turning to you.
"Think of what we can serve tomorrow. We haven't decided that." You said, looking at the 3 chefs, who nodded in agreement.
"But we don't know anything about cooking. I don't think we can offer anything remotely helpful." Mingi rubbed the back of his neck. You grabbed your notepad and marker.
"That's fine. Yunho believed he was bad at cooking but he made the berry tuile." You pointed out.
"She has a point. If Yunho can make something that nice, we probably can too." Yeosang shrugged, making Yunho glare at him and jab his side considering Yeosang was also a bad cook. Yunho would argue that Yeosang is actually a worse cook than he was since he actually burnt the bbq last time.
"Do you know how to make a quiche? I always love quiches." Hongjoong said from his spot at the sink.
"Good idea. We should do something savoury, maybe 2 savoury items?" Seonghwa looked at you. You nodded slowly and looked to Yunho for comments but he didn't say anything.
"Let's do a quiche and a galette. Kimchi, bacon and cheese quiche. Galette can be mixed vegetables with goats cheese top." You thought out loud.
"A galette is like a french pizza but it uses flaky pastry instead of pizza dough." Jongho explained.
"Ohhhhhh." The 5 nodded.
"That sounds good. I like the quiche idea with the kimchi. I'm still not sure what a galette is but I trust all of your tastes." Yunho said. You let out a small chuckle.
"The last baked good, open faced apple danishes? Then we paint apricot jam over." Wooyoung suggested. You wrote that down.
"Now, cakes." You tapped your marker against the metal suface.
"Actually, some customer today were saying they liked that seashell cake because it was good to have on the go with coffee. So maybe we should have a cupcake or muffin sort of item for them to have on the way to work." San said.
"Yes, I did hear people say that. Maybe blueberry muffins? They seem like a nice breakfast muffin." Yunho grinned, his eyes sparkling again at the though of fresh muffins.
"No, no. You need to have chocolate muffins." Mingi wagged his finger at his best friend in denial.
"No, Mingi ah. Blueberry muffins are better, especially with that crunchy, sugar crust on top." Yunho frowned, crossing his arms.
"Chocolate muffins are the best. Everyone loves chocolate muffins, even better with chocolate chips inside. Warm, chocolate muffins." Mingi argued.
"While you two debate on that... For the full cake, let's do a carrot cake." You asked.
"I was thinking matcha cake and we use the leftover strawberries from today." Seonghwa said. You nodded, writing the ideas down. There seemed to be some sort of voting that happened between the 5 because it seemed like chocolate muffins was the decided. Plus, Mingi was doing a happy dance.
"You do know you're the owner right?" You tilted your head, raising your eyebrows.
"I-I know that! But if the rest think that chocolate muffins will be more liked then maybe it is better to do that." Yunho said, concealing his sad tone.
"Okay then. Let's start prepping the pastry dough. We're doing it for quiches and galettes." You instructed.
"We're going to need a lot of butter and flour." Jongho snorted and went into the walk in.
"Let's split. Two people make dough for galettes and the other two will make for the quiches." You said, taking the equipment and putting them into the freezer temporarily.
"Why are you putting the mixer stuff into the freezer?" Yunho asked.
"We don't want the butter to melt so we're making everything as cold as possible. The more pieces of butter we have in the dough when we bake, the more steam and flakiness we get from the pastry." You explained to him. He nodded his head.
"You guys can head back and rest for the night. We'll lock up when we are done here." Seonghwa said to the 5.
"Yeah. We've all had a long day." Wooyoung agreed.
"That's okay, we want to watch." Mingi smiled. You all looked at each other and laughed. Jongho and Wooyoung weighed everything out before you and Seonghwa retrieved the cold mixer parts.
"Looks like we'll need to do it twice. This isn't going to fit into our Kitchen Aids." Jongho sighed.
"It's fine. It's just the initial mixing stage anyway, we'll do the final incorporation with our hands." You said.
"I'll get the cold water." You went out to the front, coming back with two containers of ice water. Once the butter, flour and salt/sugar were crumbled, you and Wooyoung slowly added the cold water into the mixer for the doughs to come together. Jongho helped you to manually bring the dough together.
"Let me." Seonghwa said to Wooyoung, who poured the crumbles onto the metal work surface. Seonghwa gathered it all with his hands, pressing it together.
"Here." You threw some flour and handed them the rolling pin.
"Woahhhhhhh." The 5 said in awe at the way you threw the flour onto the dough and work surface.
"It's like those professionals on television, the way they throw the flour and make it into a cloud. It spreads so evenly." Yeosang said.
"They are professionals!" San elbowed Yeosang. It was amusing, like demonstrating things to a group of kindergarteners. Jongho and Seonghwa rolled the dough out and did two book folds.
"Do you not knead the dough?" Hongjoong asked.
"Not for this dough. Kneading the dough activates the gluten in the flour and creates chewiness. You would want that for bread but not for pastry like this. You want to avoid creating any chewiness so we don't touch it." Seonghwa explained.
"This 'book fold' just creates more layers of butter. If we were doing croissants, we would do it a few more times, that's how you get the layers in a croissant." Jongho added.
"Woo and I will wrap it." You and Wooyoung went over to wrap the slabs of dough, writing on top of the plastic to indicate the use.
"That's it. We'll roll and blind bake them tomorrow morning." Wooyoung said.
"Thank you for teaching us." San smiled kindly.
You did the washing up with Jongho while Wooyoung and Seonghwa cleaned the work surface of butter and flour. The 5 other boys waited for all of you to be done.
"Let's go." Seonghwa grabbed your coat for you. Yunho watched as Seonghwa helped you put your coat on.
"Goodnight. See you all tomorrow." Mingi waved, along with the others. The 4 of you bowed and waved before heading to Wooyoung's car. Yunho and Mingi went to Yunho's car while San and Yeosang rode with Hongjoong. Mingi played the music, waiting for Yunho to start the engine.
"So, how do you really feel?" Mingi asked.
"What do you mean?" Yunho chuckled, confused by his best friend's sudden question.
"It's just the two of us, it's the first day of opening your own restaurant. You can be honest on how you really feel after today. It's okay to hate it." Mingi said.
"Hate it? I don't hate it. For from actually... I honestly thought it was going to be a disaster but it wasn't." Yunho blinked.
"I guess we fit well with the kitchen team then." Mingi said. Yunho hummed in agreement.
"They're professionals, they've worked in so many restaurants before. So I was worried that they would see how much of an amateur I am and quit but they didn't." Yunho confessed.
"Yunho ah, you need to have more faith in humanity. See? (y/n) said they weren't made when you were honest with them." Mingi teased.
Yunho rolled his eyes, knowing that Mingi was making fun of him. But it was Mingi's way of comforting Yunho. You were right, you were tougher than Yunho thought. Something bloomed in Yunho's chest, a whole new feeling of excitement.
"Well, I hope we have a long partnership with them." Yunho said with a soft smile. Mingi turned to his best friend's side profile, raising an eyebrow in suspicion.
"You're ever so positive." Mingi chuckled.
-
When Yunho walked into the cafe the next morning, he was smiling, coffee cups in hand for his kitchen crew to thank them for a successful first day. But his smile dropped slightly when he noticed only 3 people working in the kitchen.
"Where's (y/n)?" Yunho blinked, handing out the coffees.
"She told us she'll be coming in late today so we started first." Jongho shrugged, taking a sip of the coffee.
"I noticed (y/n) making a drink for you yesterday so I assumed that you are not a coffee drinker... Is a berry smoothie okay?" Yunho turned to Seonghwa.
"Yeah, that's fine. Thanks for noticing." Seonghwa blinked, stunned that Yunho took note of that.
"So... (y/n) is okay?" Yunho cleared his throat.
"She is. If not, Seonghwa hyung wouldn't be here now. He would be busy nursing her." Wooyoung teased. Seonghwa turned to glare at the younger male. He took a sip of the smoothie and continued working on what he was doing. Yunho just stared in confusion but nodded his head.
"Hey, sorry I'm late." Right on cue, you walked in. There was a container you were cradling in your hands. But no one could see what was inside, there was tin foil covering it.
"Morning." Yunho followed you in while you were putting your stuff in the small locker room.
"Hey." You replied.
"Are you alright?" Yunho asked, twidling his thumbs. After putting your bag in the small cubby, you turned around to face him, raising an eyebrow.
"Why wouldn't I be?" You asked back. Your questions back made Yunho flustered.
"N-No reason." He smiled shyly, rubbing the back of his neck. You hummed and grabbed your apron from the rack, tying it around your waist. You dug into your bag to take your knives out.
"Don't worry about me being late, I told the boys I'll stay back later to clean up after them, make up for however late I was." You spoke. Yunho wasn't worried about that, he knew that you would work schedules out with your team better than he could.
"Also, here." You shoved the container you were carrying into his hands and walked out, not wanting your team to wait any longer.
"Wait, what is-" Yunho stopped when he opened the container and saw fresh blueberry muffins inside. Touching one with his finger, he felt how they were still warm.
'Since blueberry muffins didn't win the vote.'
Was all your scribbled on the post it note that was stuck to the side of the container.
"Yunho ah. Why are you just standing there?" Mingi walked into the small space, appearing behind his best friends. He curiously peeked over Yunho's shoulder.
"Are those muffins?" Mingi asked and reached out for one but Yunho slapped Mingi's hand away, quickly closing the container.
"Ouch! What was that for?" Mingi hissed.
"Those are mine. Get your own." Yunho frowned, holding the container to his chest like it was a treasure chest filled with gold. Mingi looked at Yunho but held his hands up in defeat. Clearing his throat, Yunho went out to the front, where he was alone. He grabbed his coffee and tore open a muffin to eat.
The burst of gooey, slightly tart blueberry, coupled with the crunchy top and warmth of the muffin was the perfect accompaniment to the coffee he had.
"What's Yunho doing sitting there?" Hongjoon asked after seeing his friend sit at one of the booths.
"I can tell you what he's not doing, and that's sharing his muffins." Mingi scoffed. Hongjoong cast the taller a strange look.
"I'm going to kitchen to steal samples." Mingi said and entered the kitchen. San was already snacking on the off cuts of the carrot cake that you were cutting, wanting to edges to line up to frost.
"Hey, I want some too!" Mingi said.
"Here, have this." San held a small piece out to him. Yeosang stood by Jongho's side, watching Jongho fan out the apple slices on top of the pastry.
"That's so pretty." Yeosang complimented. Jongho nodded with a hum.
"I'm not cutting through, just scoring it so the sides around the apple slices will puff up but the middle won't." Jongho explained. Once he lined up all the apple danishes on the tray, he did a light egg wash on the exposed pastry and put the tray into the oven.
"What are you doing next?" He asked.
"I have to thin out this apricot jam to brush over the apples when it is done. It will give a nice shine and sweetness." Jongho explained.
"Who is making the quiche filling?" You asked the kitchen as you were whipping up the cream cheese frosting for the carrot cake. Wooyoung raised his hand.
"Let me just put the matcha cakes in the oven before starting on that." He said.
"Jongho, when you're done with the apricot glaze, you can start slicing the strawberries that will go in the cake." You instructed.
"Sure." Jongho nodded.
"I've started the chocolate muffins. We still need someone to put the galettes in the oven after the apple danishes come out. The vegetables have been prepped and sliced." Seonghwa said.
"I'll do it after frosting my cake." You replied. After having your 3 layers of carrot cake, you frosted them with the icing.
"What icing is this?" San asked.
"Cream cheese icing. The same as the one on the red velvet cake." You took a plastic spoon from the cup and scooped out some to let him have a taste. But before he put it in his mouth, he put some of the cake crumbs on top to have it together. He ate it and let out sounds of happiness.
"So good!" San said with a big smile. You chuckled and started the frost the cake. You were not the best at cake decorating so you just topped it swirls of the frosting, it looked pretty in a rustic way.
"Let's put this in the fridge." You brought the tray to the smaller fridge and put it in there.
"What am I working on next?... Oh, galettes." You said and grabbed the metal containers where Jongho had sliced the vegetables.
"Have the aubergines been sweated already?" You asked.
"Yes. Done and rinsed." Jongho replied. Sometimes, aubergines could be bitter so you usually sprinkle salt on them to draw out the moisture and rinse off the salt afterwards.
"So what's in here?" Yeosang came up next to you, looking at the sliced vegetables.
"Zucchini, yellow squash, bell peppers, onions and aubergines. So we'll bake this then crumble some feta cheese over." You said.
"That sounds good and I don't even like vegetables." Hongjoong chuckled from the doorway. Mingi and San seconded. It slightly amused you that these men were so open about their distaste for vegetables like children.
"We'll make you like vegetables for as long as we're here." Wooyoung joked.
"Yes, we're good at making vegetables tasty." You smiled.
~
Series masterlist
158 notes · View notes
koreandragon · 1 year
Photo
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
“Chi-yeol hyung, have a drumstick. Their seasoned chicken is better than the original.” “Okay. Thank you, Jae-woo.”
CRASH COURSE IN ROMANCE (2023) dir. Yoo Je Won
706 notes · View notes
nerdyjournals · 3 days
Text
Sweet Sugar
Tumblr media
ship: skz x diabetic!reader
Note: i, myself, am a type 2 diabetic. So a lot of these things come from my experience.
WARNING: MENTIONS OF INJECTIONS AND NEEDLES
Hyung Line. Maknae Line.
Bang Chan
Noticed you were super lethargic, like more so than normal. When asking you about it, you just waved him off and said that it probably was your sugar
Obviously, he was as confused until you pulled up an app on your phone. A big 201 took up the top of the screen.
He took your phone - scrolling through the app - as you reached for your bag, pulling out a container of peanuts. He finally understood what was going on.
You explained to him that you get super tired when it gets low as well as high. Diabetes fatigue, you said. You two were about to head out, so you couldn't exactly take a nap.
He offered to cancel and reschedule, but you just said you were used to it. He didn't like that. So he drags you to the living room and sets you on the couch to snack and rest.
He makes you share the app to his phone so he can see when you drop or rise when absolutely necessary.
Lee Know
It all started because you didn't seem excited when he announced what he was making for dinner. You haven't really had beef ribs since your diagnosis.
He was ultimately confused before you explained that red meat has a possibility to shoot up your sugar and leave you feeling off. It's not that you can't have it, but it's been a while.
He can see that you feel guilty as you assure him to still make it since everything was out. An idea clicks in his head before ushering you into the living room and told to wait.
You don't really question him as he goes about working, not even when he answers a delivery at the door.
By the time he calls you in, the table is set with the ribs, sides, and a plate of chicken. Same seasonings and everything. He could see the guilt reappearing on your face, and would have none of that.
He sat you down, placed the chicken in front of you, and took his own seat. He said nothing until you started eating, humming in contempt when you dug in.
It felt nice that he didn't get mad or make you feel like the bad guy. He just accommodated you and still respected you. It was perfect.
Changbin
The loud beeping of your phone caught his attention, making him laugh as you scrambled to turn it off.
You let out a groan and looked around for your bag, pulling out a small insulated bag, and excusing yourself to the restroom.
He said nothing, just a little confused. It was when you came back rubbing at your belly that he spoke up. You had to inject some insulin with all the snacks the two of you had today, nothing too special.
You could see the panic rise to his eyes before quickly assuring him that you were okay. You just didn't account for all your favorite goodies to be in his studio and you went at them like a man starved. You just had to be mindful for the rest of the day.
He immediately asked you if he had to get rid of the snacks and realized you'd rather put his head in a spike than lose access to your favorites...playfully.
A lot of personal stuff had been happening recently and you were the type to eat your feelings. He was too.
The best compromise you could come up with was finding similar snacks to fix the craving and keep you steady while keeping the bad ones under lock and key of which Changbin had.
Hyunjin
It was the clicking coming from the bathroom that caught his attention. He pushed open the cracked door to check on you, only to find you injecting insulin into your stomach.
He quickly backed up out of shock and re-shut the door. Waiting another second before knocking in the door, he slowly opened it. You were rubbing the spot with an amused look on your face.
The two of you were about to have dinner, and you had to prep yourself first. The injections were fairly new, so the two of you would have to get used to it.
He spends the whole meal talking and asking questions about your condition. You do your best to explain and it suffices.
It amazes him that you're able to be so functional after you talk about some of the side effects and handicaps.
In the following days, he does research about what snacks are safe for you and sticks them in the apartment. It throws him for a loop when he sees the bottles of medicine you leave with him as back up. Since when do they make pills that size?!
Tag list: @krisstheidiot @snowyquokka @scarlet789 @tinyelfperson @euphoricaspen @rylea08 @palindrome969 @missmajdastark @michelle4eve @wolfyychan @aelin-sardothien @yongbokwifey @kaiyaba @antisocial-socialbutterfly
(if your name is in blue, i cannot tag you for some reason. Please DM with an alternate name if possible.)
join the tag list
75 notes · View notes