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lassieposting · 6 months

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Been thinking a lot lately about romanced Astarion post-spawn ending.

Because like. The Funnest™ thing about cptsd is how much of it gets delayed. When you're trapped in a lengthy, ongoing traumatic situation, you do not have the ability to process and start healing your mental wounds. Your brain and body go into survival mode, and all that matters in the moment is that you somehow cope with the horrors. He wouldn't have been able to even begin dealing with the physical, mental and emotional toll of two hundred years of torture, brutalization and dehumanization while he was under Cazador's control; he is in constant danger, surrounded by sharks in the water, and survival means not letting them smell blood. He can't afford to fall apart, to show weakness. He is shockingly functional and competent in-game, partly because he has to be to work as a game character, but also partly because...it do be like that, to some degree. When death, for whatever reason, is not an option, you just have to shut down and keep going. People adapt in order to survive, and when we learn that showing an "injury" (physical or psychological) only gets us punished, we learn to hide it.

Early-game Astarion is terrified - of Cazador, of Godey, of being hunted down by his siblings, of being staked or sold off at the first opportunity by Tav and the other companions, of turning into a mindflayer, of another painful transformation, of losing himself when he's only just regained his autonomy after two centuries, of what Cazador will do to him if he ever finds him - the man is overwhelmed by fear. He's on thin ice as a vampire, and he's not going to give them any more reason to want him gone. Survival instinct is still in control, and in this new situation, crafting some fragile safety for himself means not only selling his body for protection, but also being useful. Clear-headed. Good in a fight.

Endgame Astarion finds himself in a completely different situation. The time-sensitive overarching threats - Cazador and impending ceremorphosis - have been dealt with. He has a loving, supportive partner he's really starting to feel safe with - Tav/Durge has proved that they're on his side, that their affection is genuine, that they don't just want him for the one thing he's been told he's good for. They've told him they're going to help him find a workaround for his sun allergy. He's getting fed regularly. He has time to stop, and breathe, and just. Recuperate.

For the first time in 200 years, he is safe.

And it will probably take a while to catch up, during which time he will seem to be coping really well, but at some point, his brain is going to realise that he's safe, and it's going to finally start processing the sheer fucking horror he's been through. Since I haven't seen anyone talking about this particular fun aspect of cptsd, allow me to offer u some thoughts on issues Astarion and Tav might end up dealing with in the months/years postgame, during the

✨ Delayed Trauma Response ✨

Memory Gaps: Astarion realising, as he opens up to Tav, that there are entire years or decades of his life from which he has only a handful of memories. Great big blank stretches where he has no idea where he was, who he was with, what was happening to him. Some of the gaps cover years at a time where he was so dissociated and shut down that he just didn't retain any memories of what was going on around him. Some are shorter periods of particularly horrific torture that his brain has deliberately blocked out to protect him.

Recovered Memories: At some point, years into the future when he's done A Lot of healing, he might find that every now and then, a fragment of those lost memories will unexpectedly come back to him. He'll catch a particular scent on the breeze, or overhear a specific phrase in the street, or cross paths with someone whose face is oddly familiar, and he'll get a glimpse of an acute horror he'd filed neatly away where it couldn't hurt him anymore. He very rarely remembers all the context to those flashes of his past. He might recall that he was punished, but not what he was punished for, or he might remember words spoken by a greedy conquest, but be unable to recall the man's face.

Dissociation: Tav knows going into this relationship that Astarion has basically made an art out of dissociating during sex. They also know, from their shared encounter with the drow twins, that he's not great at enforcing his own boundaries - he'll always say he'll speak up and back out if he stops having fun, but in practice he rarely does; he's not used to having the option of saying no to his partner, and being punished if he tries. So they know there's going to be some practice and experimentation and negotiation necessary there, to figure out the rough limits of his comfort zone. But once he starts really processing, there may be days where he just checks out completely. Tav will touch his shoulder, and he'll startle and apologise - "Terribly sorry, darling, I was miles away for a moment there." And Tav will gently point out that he's been sat in the same spot vacantly staring into the middle distance for hours. They've been checking in on him occasionally and this is the first time he's responded. It's unsettling, to say the least.

Lost Time: Astarion was very young when he was turned, physically mature but emotionally juvenile. He was basically an overgrown teenager, in the phase of life where elves are just starting to learn who they are and what they want, and figure out their place in the world. But he never got to do that, because he spent his formative young adult years in a world where everyone became an abuser, where his only means of surviving was to smile and charm and obey while even his basic human dignity was stripped away. He learned that communication is based on manipulation. He learned that the powerful can do whatever they like to the weak. He learned an incredibly toxic, abusive way of life, and that was his family dynamic, his everyday life, for as long as he can remember. Now that he's free and safe, he's realising that the world doesn't actually work that way and that he's now far behind even shorter-lived races in social/emotional development. He's grieving for the person he could've been. He's grieving for the life he could've lived. He's grieving for all the years he already lost, and the ones he'll lose in the future as he flounders to catch up. A decent chunk of his life was stolen from him, and that's time he will never get back.

Flashbacks & Night Terrors: Specifically the kind where your brain convinces you that an injury you had a long time ago is actually an injury you have (or are receiving) right now. There are nights where he'll wake Tav in a panic, because his back feels like it's on fire, he can feel every freshly-carved wound dripping blood and he's in so much pain he doesn't know what else to do. If Tav looks, they see nothing out of the ordinary - old, long-healed scars, same as always. But the pain and the fear and the distress are all very real to him, and all they can do is try to comfort him, cover his back with cool damp cloths or healing salves, remind him he's safe now and they're not leaving him.

Boundary Shifting: Sometimes, Tav can come up and hug him from behind, and he'll melt into them a little bit and go all soft and happy. Other times, he might flinch away or go rigid at the same gesture. A lot of the time, it really depends on how he's feeling on the day, but at least a little bit of it is deliberate - he's pushing to find the limit of just how much autonomy Tav is willing to give him. He wants to know at what point they'll stop respecting his "no". Will they accept it if he doesn't want a hug? If he wants to sleep in his own room tonight? At what point will understanding turn to anger at being rejected? From the drow twins four/fivesome, we also know he's got a tendency to push his own boundaries, and jump into things he's actually not ready for, and Tav would be the one holding his hand through the fallout as he tries to figure out what his own boundaries even are.

Frustration! So, so much frustration. He wants to be Over It already. He wants to move past everything that ever happened to him and never think about it again. He hates that Cazador still has a grip on him, even in death - he doesn't want to give the bastard the satisfaction of dwelling on all his punishments, his cruelties. Sometimes, that frustration is going to explode outwards at Tav - he'll get angry at them for coddling him, or find something small to start a fight over, or he'll set an unreasonable boundary and try to defend it because he's still learning what healthy boundaries look like. Sometimes, it will implode inwards, and that won't be about Tav at all, but they'll get the brunt of it all the same - it might come out as self-loathing or self-punishment, and he'll react by doing something stupid, like trying to drive them away, because having a secure, relatively healthy relationship is terrifying and the instinct is to destroy it before Tav can. There will be yelling and angry tears and deeply unhealthy coping mechanisms, and they'd have to work through that. Trauma is ugly, and Astarion is right at the beginning of a very long journey towards healing.

Abandonment Issues: Astarion wants the relationship to be one between equals, but he's kind of got Tav on a pedestal all the same. They saved him. They helped him get rid of Cazador for good. They chose him and love him despite a wealth of better (in his eyes) options, and all his baggage. They stayed with him even when he has very little to offer them. We know his vanity and obnoxious self-absorption is a fragile attempt to obscure the fact that his self-esteem is in the dirt and he has virtually no self-worth, and there are a couple of occasions in-game where it becomes clear that he's afraid of losing the one person who somehow considers him lovable. After seeing Sebastian and all the other conquests, he begs Tav not to hate him, saying that he did what he had to. If he has a rival for Tav's affections, and Tav informs him that they broke up with the rival to be with Astarion, he's shocked and the first thing out of his mouth is, "You ended things with them for me? Why?" And if Durge tries to break up with him for his own safety, his facade drops and he immediately asks if he did something wrong. So while he's not afraid to argue with Tav, if something happens - like an angry outburst - that upsets or angers them, and he thinks he's at risk of losing that one steady, stable person in his life, he might well cling and overcompensate to try and repair what he thinks is a fracture in their relationship. He'll fawn or beg or crawl into Tav's bed to "apologise" and "make it up to them" because, well, very occasionally it worked on Cazador. With patience and good communication and lots of repeatedly driving the lesson home to overcome 200 years of education to the contrary, he will eventually start to believe that "I'm really pissed off at you right now," does not equate to, "You are the worst mistake I've ever made and I am leaving you."

Panic Attacks: I feel like honestly he'd get some symptoms of these on a fairly regular basis, but he's never been given any option other than just trying to power through them. He's used to realising he's shaking, he's used to feeling like he's watching himself from outside his body, or like he can't breathe even though he doesn't need to. He's very familiar with the sickening fear in his gut, so intense it makes his head spin. He's not used to being comforted or reassured about them - he thinks they're normal. Tav disagrees.

Anyway, cptsd is messy and complicated and often looks very different from person to person so these will not represent everyone's but these are just some ideas for what the ongoing recovery process might make them work through, based on the aspects I'm most familiar with.

Projecting? Who's projecting? I'm not projecting. Shut up.

#bg3 #bg3 headcanons #bg3 meta #astarion x tav #astarion x durge #mom said it's my turn to project on the blorbo #astarion ancunin

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bonny-kookoo · 8 months

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Jungkook

𝓣𝓪𝓴𝓮 𝓒𝓪𝓻𝓮. [Closed Doors]

Jungkook makes decisions every day- but none has ever felt as hard to make as the decision whether or not to keep or leave you.

Tags/Warnings: Hospital/Medical AU, Doctor!Jungkook, slightly aged up!Jungkook, Hybrid!Reader, Dog Hybrid!Reader, another slightly heavy one but the comfort is strong with this hurt, angst, fluff, romance, strangers to lovers, blood, medical stuff, mentions of domestic (physical and mental) abuse, corruption, mentions of drug abuse, health scare²

Length: 2.3k Words, it's very tiny I'm very sorry

-> Masterlist

There is no taglist for this fic.

A/N: hi sorry I just really like this fic pls eat your vegetables

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"The little guy is recovering good." Namjoon nods. "But we'll have to inform child protective services, no matter if it was an accident or not.." He sighs, as Jungkook nods.

"I'm pretty sure it'll go well if it really was just that." He says. "I can't believe people just leave this stuff around when they know children eat any candy they see the moment they get the chance to." He shakes his head a bit angrily. "If that boy was a hybrid he'd be dead."

"Luckily he's not. I'll send the boy over to pediatrics, and as soon as that happens, he's out of our hands." Namjoon reminds his friend and coworker, as they both silently agree, walking through the hall. "How's your puppy doing?"

"Awake, and she's been transferred out of the ICU this morning, so I'm gonna check on her now and see how she's doing." Jungkook sighs, running a hand through his hair.

"Have you decided if you want to take her in yet?" Namjoon wonders, greeting a fellow doctor who's passing by.

"No." Jungkook shakes his head. "Not.. yet."

It's a touchy subject for now- so Namjoon leaves it alone- letting the doctor enter your new room on his own, to check up on you.

It's quiet inside, no nurse yet present- and Jungkook is actually a little thankful for the short, quiet moment he's got. Standing close to you, he lets his hand run over one of your soft ears- now cleaned and fur soft and vibrant in color. It's something Jimin had informed him about yesterday- how you cried from happiness after he'd helped you properly clean your ears and tail, something that appeared to be very much unfamiliar and new to you.

It angers him, to know that you were nothing but something to show off until now.

So many of your health problems could've been avoided if you just had received any amount of proper care and attention. Yoongi already suspects that you might have developed some behavioral issues from the way you've been living until now- all that, combined with your physical troubles will take weeks if not months to resolve. If they ever resolve fully at all, that is.

Not that Jungkook really cares. He'd take you in even if you were to bite and scratch.

But it's not that easy, and he knows this. "Hello?" He carefully says as his hand shakes your shoulder gently. "Can you wake up for me for a moment?" He requests, and your eyes slowly open, squinting at the bright hospital lights, before you stretch- and hiss at something cramping. "Good morning." He greets you- and suddenly you seem to realize who's there- and your tail begins to wag under the blanket, ears turned towards him as you smile. "How do you feel, hm?" He wonders, but you don't answer.

It's to be expected. All of these traumatic events must've taken a toll on you- not just physically.

"Well you're looking a lot better already, that's for sure." Jungkook tells mostly himself, though he smiles when he spots you taking the praise for yourself as well. It gives him a moment just to quietly look at you; imagine what life could be like if someone like you was to wait for him inside his apartment, every day whenever he'd come home from work.

Surely, you'd turn his apartment into a home in no time. The thought of just a little more chaos inside his living space, a little more of a mess here and there, a bit of disorder in his life, might just be what could color his life a little more vibrantly. Make things more exciting, more emotionally valuable- maybe it could even make his life less about work, and more about..

well, living.

You're yawning, and he laughs, train of thought broken as he pets your head teasingly, before the door opens, and a very chipper Jimin walks in. "Ah, there's my favorite person!" He sings almost, walking in to put the small tray of food down, before he looks at Jungkook. "And you too, Doctor Jeon."

"Well thank you." Jungkook jokes, before he watches as Jimin opens the tray, revealing some light soup and rice for you to eat. It's only a small portion- just to slowly ease you back into eating, and not overwhelm you again. He notices how attached you seem to what he recognizes is an empty pillowcase of all things you seem to cling to, probably for comfort, taken from your first room you occupied. It's another problem- you now have no one to bring you any clothes or comforting items into hospital at all.

You're alone, all by yourself.

And for some reason, the realization of that small fact hits him hard.

♥━━━━━━━━━━•.♡.•━━━━━━━━━━━━♥

It's been not even a full 24 hours, and you're already causing mischief.

"There you are!" Jungkook sighs, relieved to have finally found you near a vending machine two floors away from where you should be- which is in your room, in your bed. You, meanwhile, are just simply smiling at him, tail wagging at the sight of him crouching down to you to pet your head. "Come on now, you gave the poor nurses a near heart-attack by vanishing like that." He gently scolds, before he stands back up to his full height, reaching for your hand.

But you just let yourself fall to your side, stubborn. Tail still wagging, smacking onto the smooth floor.

"Got yourself a troublemaker, huh doctor Jeon?" An older nurse laughs, watching the interaction between the hybrid specialist and you while she prepares a cart with food trays for the patients. The news of Jungkook's interest in maybe adopting you permanently has made it's round quite quickly by now- mostly thanks to Jimin, who's the unofficial news reporter of every bit of gossip there is.

Jungkook sighs. "Seems like it." He chuckles, unable to really be upset with you, considering how glad he is to see you up and running again instead of pale and fighting in the ER. It's as if you finally realized that in here, no one actually wants to hurt you. No one blames you. No one is mad at you. You're actually being cared for here- you can truly be yourself, and no one's gonna get upset over it.

And slowly, Jungkook starts to see your true personality- which does help in his decision whether or not you'll fit into his life, or not. He's not made one yet- the papers are still at home, on his desk in his office, unsigned.

It's a tough decision to make, after all.

On one hand, sure; he really likes you, you seem absolutely sweet and also independent enough to stay at home by yourself if he goes by all of your documents, which included general assessment of your overall intelligence and social capabilities. You're a bit of an odd case- while your instincts are very strong, your hybrid features very well developed, and your overall behavior shows habits and reactions similar to a hybrid much higher on the scale, you do know how to properly process situations in a more human way.

For example; Loud noises startle you, but they don't make you panic. Food and snacks make you excited, but they're useless as bribery if you don't want to do something. You can read, write, and are educated to a very good degree, and you understand social cues without any issues.

But on the other hand, Jungkook isn't a man with endless patience. He gets frustrated easily, especially with himself- so what if he snaps at you on accident? Will you understand that he doesn't mean it badly, and that it's not even directed at you? And what about when he has to work- will you be lonely in his home, unhappy but too nice to actually tell him? He doesn't want you to just waste away while he's too focused on his career. It's something important for him, after all- he can't just quit and call it a day.

Even if you were to say that you don't need the attention, or the affection, or constant care or anything at all- he'd still feel bad for not providing it anyways. Because you deserve it. You deserve someone who can love you each day properly, someone who doesn't have to push you to the back every time his job has to take priority.

He's not sure what decision to make.

Or if there's even a choice at all.

Suddenly, you're pulling on his shirt to get back his attention- probably because he started to look mad while thinking. He knows he does this- it's why he usually turns away from patients whenever he has to think about something, which makes his face look upset. "I'm not mad." He reassures you, smiling again, petting your ears again while you watch him with suspicion. You're currently in a different headspace, regressing after all the stress and honestly rather traumatic events, which makes communication a little difficult- but everyone manages, since you're quite expressive in other ways, able to tell what you want and think either way.

Jungkook wants to take care of you- he wants to take you home, and make sure you're happy forever, but he can't be selfish, or too fast with his decision.

"Now come on, it's lunch soon. You hungry?" He asks, and you nod, tail wagging as you stand up alongside him, hand holding onto his shirt as you walk next to him-

and this time, he decides to cave in a little, as he instead holds your hand in his while walking back to your room with you.

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Jungkook likes to play music in his apartment, even if it's just quiet.

It fills the space with noise, makes him feel less lonely, takes his mind off of things. It helps relax. But tonight, it doesn't really work, as he sits in his office, sighing as he looks at the unsigned paperwork still on his desk in front of him. He's read through all the documents more than twice now, knows what's written down, what information it all gives out to him- and yet, he's unsure what to do with it.

If he signs it, you'll be given to him for a foster time first- three weeks of 'trying it out' so to speak, to see if you're a good fit for him, and if he's a good fit for you. During that time, a careworker will visit randomly to check up once or twice, and at the end of it, it's you both who have to agree to an actual permanent registration. But Jungkook worries, he always does.

The thing he worries most about, is the fact that he feels like he's already in too deep. There's a small, pink and white plush toy in his lap after all, bought yesterday straight after work from a store specializing in hybrid clothing and other items. It's a comfort plush that holds scents very well, so he keeps it close to his body ever since buying it to offer it to you tomorrow morning when he's back in hospital to check up on you.

And yes, he has been browsing what a dog hybrid of your specific breed might need to live a happy life. He might also have looked up options for sports or other activities you might want to do-

he's really in deep, isn't he?

He sighs yet again, scratching his head in frustration after he puts down the pen, staring at the 'signature here' spot at the bottom. It could all be so easy, but he really doesn't want to fuck this all up.

He knows from Taehyung, an anesthesiologist and good friend, that having a hybrid can actually work out perfectly. He's balancing it just fine, his own hybrid at home happy and healthy, his work never suffering, his happiness thriving. The young medical worker always shows off pictures of him and his hybrid, proudly, and he really has every reason to be, considering where she came from.

But Jungkook also knows how tough it can be.

He's reminded of it every time he checks up on Yoongi and his cat hybrid- now awake, but clearly in distress over her lack of control over her own body, and it's going to be a long road to recovery for her and Yoongi just as much. He knows they'll get through it- but the amount of heartbreak and absolute terror that went down just scared Jungkook, straight up.

And he knows, your future together is absolutely going to be both of those scenarios- good, and bad.

"What's the worst that can happen.." He hums to himself, one hand playing with the fuzz of the comfort plush in his lap, little black eyes staring blankly at him, tiny mouth curved into a forever smile.

You deserve a happy future. You deserve to have opportunities, and care, and affection, and a stable environment you can rely on, and thrive in. And he won't ever really gain the knowledge of that happening if he's not the one providing that for you.

And yet, the doubts are still there, clouding his mind.

What's he going to do?

#bts imagine #bts fanfic #bts fic #jungkook imagine #hybrid imagine #jeon jungkook x reader #jeon jungkook imagine #bts jungkook imagine #jungkook x reader #bts jungkook fanfic #jeon jungkook imagines #bts jeon jungkook imagine

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the-power-of-a-pen · 11 months

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A Way Home

Fandom: Spiderverse

Summary: Following the loss of his alternate universe daughter, Miguel is reluctant to risk letting anyone close to him and breaking canon again. However, as most anomalies are returned to their universes, there's the issue of you. You don't have a universe to return to. So, after having you on his team for half a year, he adopts you as his child.

Word Count: 4654

Pairing?: Father-child relationship btwn Miguel and gn! reader.

Trigger Warnings: Some cursing, reader is hinted to having a traumatic past (very briefly and vaguely described), 1 reference to reader as "Spiderman" (meant as a gender-neutral phrase)

A/n: This turned out to be longer than I had planned b/c I realized how much I had to add to make the change of heart even slightly natural, so let me know if y'all want a part two of the reader and Miguel interacting further along the adoption. Not sure how I feel about the structure + characterization in this one. Feedback much appreciated! Please!! I'm on my hands and knees, begging for feedback!!!

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"Lyla, status on current anomalies," Miguel ordered. He leaned over the yellow panels in front of him, watching the same scene of him and his child playing over and over again. His grip on the console tightened.

She blipped into view. "Currently, there are 918,503,201 anomalies to be returned to their home universes. That's 40% less than yesterday! Spider-Byte does have an update for you regarding-"

"I'll convene with her later. I'm busy."

"Busy brooding over your twelfth cup of coffee. Not enough sugar this time around?" Lyla teased, only to be met with a glare. "Alright, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. But seriously, it can't wait. A canon event was disrupted and now there's a spider-person without a universe to return to."

Miguel turned around dangerously fast. "What did you just say?"

"Talk to Margo -- she'll fill you in." Lyla blipped away.

------

"There you are," Margo mumbled to herself as Miguel approached. "This one's in rough shape, got dropped in Earth 616 and put up a fierce fight before Jessica took them to HQ. I tried to send them through the Go Home Machine, but it just dropped them back here."

"And you're sure it's not a hardware issue?"

"It's 2099," Margo drolled and rolled her eyes. "There's no hardware issues anymore, grandpa."

"Then try sending them home again. I don't see why this requires my supervision."

"This machine tears people's atoms apart and throws them back together in other dimensions," she explained. "If I run the same person through the machine too many times, they could die."

Miguel sighed heavily and began pacing around. "Well, what am I supposed to do? Keep them here forever?"

Margo looked at him like he was crazy and slowly nodded. "You can't leave them here to die."

"They're an anomaly anywhere they go, Spider-Byte. Maybe death would be a mercy."

"To you," Peter B. called from behind him.

"Maldito sea, carajo" Miguel cursed under his breath, turning around. "I thought you were taking the week off."

"Well, I was going to, but Mayday was begging me for another one of these cafeteria burgers," he said with his mouth full of food. "They're really good, you should seriously try them sometime."

Miguel's eyes darted to Mayday and quickly darted away. "I have work to return to in my office, so if you'll excuse me-"

Peter stepped in his way. "I'm sorry, Miguel, but I can't let you walk away from this problem. It's gone too far."

"I'm sorry, what?" Miguel questioned, laughing bitterly.

"Ok, I'm not great with words, especially not in front of big, strong, angry men, so MJ had me prewrite this, let me just get it- oh, Mayday has it. Mayday, hold the paper up for daddy, thanks, sweetheart."

Peter cleared his throat and began to over-annunciate his speech. "Everyone in this building joined your society because they believed in your ability to lead, shape, and change the world. We trusted you to use humane practices behind your actions and to keep the safety and rights of humanity at mind before all else. However, given the fact- Ok, this is bullshit - sorry, Mayday, don't tell mommy. Point is, Miguel, that you claim that you're all about saving the multiverse and saving humanity, but then you throw half of your sanity away to hunt down a 15 year old kid who just wants to save his dad. You're so obsessed with the concept of saving humanity that you forgot what it's like to care about individual humans. You forgot how to be a human."

"I never forgot what it felt like to care. To love."

"It's okay to admit that the new kid reminds you of your daughter, you know."

For a moment, Miguel and Peter B. just stood across from each other in silence, unable to break eye contact. Miguel's expression was intense, but otherwise unreadable. Then: "Go home, Parker. More and more of you prove that you're untrustworthy when it comes to prioritizing the greater good. I'm not afraid to get rid of you, too."

Peter's arms gripped on tighter to Mayday. He seemed to want to say something, but found it in him to walk away. Once he went through his portal back home, Miguel called for Lyla.

"Hold the chatter, Lyla," he said before she could open her mouth, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Silence any notifications except for the urgent ones. And I mean urgent."

"Well, since you asked so nicely," she remarked sarcastically, but complied.

------

Everything in Miguel's office repeated like a broken record. The video of his daughter. Peter's comment that he "forgot what it's like to care about humans, forgot how to be human." Gwen's "we're supposed to be the good guys." The feeling of his own child glitching out of existence in his palms, the very reason he got into this work. The ticking of the clock. The ticking of that motherfucking clock.

He zipped a web to the clock and smashed it into the ground, falling to a knee amidst the broken glass.

"I understand that you're having a very emo moment right now, Mr. O'Hara," Pavitr began, "But Jessica told me to drop this off." He placed the file on the floor and nudged it over with his foot as far as he could without getting too close. "I'm heading home now, have a great day!"

"Wait."

"Oh, I was afraid you would say that."

"Tell Jessica to report to my office."

"She said to tell you that she's not available until noon tomorrow."

"Of course," he chuckled angrily. "One person's off for the week, another needs 3 weeks of recovery. Now one of my only trustworthy members can't report for duty until tomorrow. But who's checking in on me, huh? That's right - no one. I took on this leadership role because I know firsthand what it feels like to have the only joy in your life, your only reason for living, taken away from you because of your own reckless mistakes. And despite all of that, I made it my life's mission to make sure it doesn't happen to anyone else. But now I'm the villain?! "'We're supposed to be the good guys!'" "'You can't leave them to die!'" "'They remind you of your daughter.'" But does anyone else here know the pain of losing a child you weren't even destined to have?"

Pavitr blinked heavily. "With all due respect, sir, I'm 17."

Miguel barely seemed to hear him. He sank to the floor, running his hands through his hair and not bothering to clear the glass shards around him. "Maybe they're all right. Maybe I'm the one hurting everyone else. Maybe I'll make the same mistake I did before, and take another innocent life because I want to feel fulfilled, just for a moment."

"Should I get someone?"

Miguel sighed. "Just go."

------

“Morning, sunshine,” Jessica called, taking a seat in Miguel’s office. “You had a chance to go through the file?”

Miguel hummed in agreement. “Need a second opinion.”

Jessica flipped through her copy of your file. “Teenager, been Spiderman for 2 years, originally from Earth 45, but got dropped in Ben’s world. A slippery one for sure; took nearly two hours to get them on the ground. Tried talking to them, but they wouldn't speak. I know my stance on this, but what’s yours?”

Miguel paced around the room. “We can’t keep them here. They’re an anomaly regardless of where they go. Margo said that it would be too inhumane to send them through the Go Home Machine again, so… I think we should let them go quietly.”

“Are you serious?”

“When am I not serious?” He took a seat across from Jessica. “I’ve been hearing it from everyone else. I need to hear it from someone who was there from the beginning. Someone who I trust. Am I falling off the edge? Have I gone too far?”

She raised her eyebrows. “You’re just now questioning that? Look, as your friend, I’ll say this: you’re taking too much weight onto your shoulders. You need to stop being Spiderman for a moment and start being Miguel.” She shifted in her seat. “But, as your teammate, I want you to know that I’ll be by your side no matter what you choose.”

Miguel nodded, but he was totally spaced out. All he could think about was his daughter. How he wanted to take this one in so bad, just to feel like a father again, feel like a man again. How he feared the consequences of love.

Jessica snapped in front of his face. “Earth to Miguel.”

He shook his head. “What?”

“Look, I can’t say that I don’t agree with your initial idea. But I look at them, and at Gwen, and at my future kid, and-” She put her hand on her stomach “-I just can’t imagine leaving them in the dust like that. I was wrong about Gwen, yes, but these kids are suffering. And I don’t know if we can keep making these hard decisions that put these people right back where they were trying to escape from and still call ourselves heroes.”

Miguel held his face in his hands. “I don’t know what’s up and down anymore, right or wrong. I was all of these kids once: Miles, Gwen, Hobie. I know what it’s like to love your family so much that you throw everything else to the wayside. But that cost me my child, and thousands of other lives. I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t do anything to stop it. I just want to stop the suffering. I just want it to stop.”

Jessica gave him a moment. “Let’s meet the kid. Give them a trial before we make any decisions we can’t take back.”

“Alright,” he agreed, “But if you’re wrong about this-”

“Then lunch is on me. Come on, mafioso.”

------

“Here they are,” Margo announced. “Just so you know, they’re fully aware of their situation, but not very talkative.”

“Let me talk to them,” Miguel insisted. “I want to hear what they have to say.”

As Miguel and Jessica approached, you refused to meet their eyes. Instead, you drew your hood closer to your face.

Miguel took a knee by you, talking through the red barrier. “Hey, kid. My name is Miguel. Miguel O’Hara. I’m Spiderman.”

You gasped dramatically. “No way! Really? I never would have guessed!”

He took in a breath. “So you do speak. Look, we’re trying to relocate you, but we need to have your account of what happened. Why doesn’t your home exist anymore?”

You shrugged and counted off the events on your fingers. “Dalmatian-looking dude crashed through a window at my internship. He went straight for the collider room, and most of my mentors were at lunch, so I went after him. I tried to shut off the collider at the same time he stepped through it, he pushed me into a hole, that lady behind you caught me after an uncomfortably long chase, and here we are.”

“You worked at Alchemax,” Miguel mumbled, though mostly to himself.

“Yeah,” you replied, leaning back. “What’s that got to do with anything?”

“Did you get bitten by the radioactive spider before or after working there?”

“Did I fucking what?”

“That’s how you got your powers, right?” He asked.

“My powers? Oh, I see what’s happening here,” you laughed. “You’re all off your rockers! Let me guess, this is some alternate dimension Alchemax where everyone’s trying to biologically get the abilities that I developed through technology. Ooh ooh, or, this is an elite spider society trying to save the multiverse from itself!”

“That was really just a guess?” questioned Jessica.

“I read a lot of sci-fi,” you explained.

“Nevermind all of that,” Miguel groaned. “What’s your story, kid? What’s your motive? Because if we don’t have that information, we can’t help get you out of there.”

Your expression became grave for a moment as you considered your options and chuckled bitterly. “My story? My story is that I’m a poor kid from the slums who worked their ass off to get into a good school so that I could do better for my family. My story is that my family never loved me, my friends never cared, and I was forced to choose between what I love to do and what the world needed from me. I didn’t have the power to stop my parents from hurting me or stop people from hurting each other. So, I manufactured that power and took it into my own hands. My story is that the moment I was released from that hellhole of a world, I was locked up in a three foot wide cage and forced to talk about my feelings. I heard what you guys were talking about in that back room. All I ask is that you do it quickly. I don’t like waiting.”

“Miguel, we can take a quick debrief if you need one,” Jessica offered, putting a hand on his shoulder.

Miguel didn’t budge. He looked into your eyes and felt your pain like it was his own. He opened his mouth, then closed it again. Finally: “Let them go, Margo.”

“What?”

“You heard me,” he asserted. “Let them go.”

Margo released you and offered her hand to help you step down from the pedestal, which you reluctantly accepted. “Didn’t know you were one for sob stories, Mr. O’Hara,” you mocked, though your comment fell through as soon as your legs trembled from lack of use.

“I’m not,” he responded, walking up to you. “But I know an innovator when I see one. You’re hurt, yes, but you have the capacity to do so much good. I’m offering you a place on my team.”

You approached cautiously, your arms crossed. “And if I say no?”

“I’d ask you to reconsider.” He held out his hand for a shake. You accepted, and he smiled. “Welcome to HQ.”

Margo whooped in the background and gave your shoulder a squeeze.

------

“Ok, first mission briefing,” Miguel started, walking backwards.

“On the move?” you asked.

“That’s the only way to do it.” He shot a web to a nearby building and dropped from an HQ terrace.

You followed suit. “Where exactly are we going?” you shouted over the wind.

“Earth 616. There’s a rogue Vulture stealing tech from Osborn. We’d let it happen, but the man's the only thing between a country of people and an all-out war.”

“Got it.”

“We go in, capture Vulture, and bring him back to HQ. Shouldn’t be too difficult.”

You stepped through your portal and immediately got whiplash from the pure speed of a nearby aircraft.

Vulture swooped down from above and tore the tail off of the police helicopter. It crashed into a skyscraper and gained speed as it headed for the street below.

Miguel spoke to you through the comms. “Trial number one, newbie. I’ll pursue Vulture; you stop that helicopter from hurting civilians.”

“On it.” You dived off of your skyscraper to gain speed and pulled yourself forward with your webs. In one smooth movement, you grabbed the two co-pilots and placed them on the closest rooftop.

The helicopter was quickly approaching the ground, where children were playing in an enclosed playground.

“Shit,” you murmured, propelling yourself under the machine to create a landing pad for it at a safe distance from the kids. At the rate you could fire, you wouldn’t be able to stop it on time.

In the distance, you saw Miguel struggling to keep Vulture away from a construction site, and reached out to him over the comms. “Have him ram into that crane.”

“What?”

“Just trust me.”

Miguel redirected the Vulture, dodging last second when he attacked so that the crane would fall down.

The crane caught the chopper where it was, and you used it as a crutch to help you redirect the chaos to the empty street. You swung around the crane five times, wrapping an immense amount of webbage around it and attaching along the side of a business building. When the helicopter threatened to fall due to the weight of it, you shot three web bombs at it to keep it in place.

When you reached the ground, you were out of breath and half-heartedly waving to the clapping children and their parents. Miguel placed his hand on your shoulder as you observed the incapacitated Vulture.

“Not bad, kid,” Miguel chuckled. “Not bad.”

------

A good six months had passed, and you had risen in the ranks of the Spider Society. You were still without a place to stay, and had been bouncing from place to place in between missions. The first month, it was Pavitr and his aunt’s place. Then, Hobie’s, then HQ, and finally, Gwen’s. Most of your free time was spent discussing tech with Margo or trailing behind Miguel.

A building-wide alert had gone off, sending every spider-being into high alert as they searched for the threat.

“What’s the sitch?” you asked Miguel as the two of you bounded down the hall. “A futuristic Rhino that’s suspected to work for The Spot just invaded HQ. He’s trying to destroy our tech and pick us off.”

Just as Miguel had finished his explanation, Rhino crashed through a door four floors below. You both zipped towards him, barely avoiding running into Peter B. as he took a picture of himself, Mayday, and Rhino. Miguel attacked Rhino head-on, performing a spin-kick to the face before webbing his arms together and latching onto his back. Rhino broke his constraints effortlessly, and threw Miguel out of a nearby window. You helped Noir get to his feet and went after Rhino.

By the time you got there, Rhino had Miguel pinned to the cracked concrete. His web shooters were broken, and he was using all of his remaining strength to stop Rhino from snapping his neck. When he saw you approaching, he tried to silently signal for you to go, but you didn’t listen.

“Hey, Alexei!” you shouted. “I never really took you for the dominant type! It doesn’t suit you.”

You swung a piece of concrete at his back and zipped to deliver a punch to the face. Rhino was quick to return the favor, and charged you through a nearby wall.

Miguel attempted to stand up as backup arrived. He climbed onto Rhino’s back and sunk his teeth into his neck, effectively, though temporarily, paralyzing him. A team of 15 spiderbeings worked to get Rhino back to HQ while you and Jessica helped Miguel to his feet.

“What the hell were you thinking, kid? You could have died,” Miguel snapped.

“You were the one near death,” you argued. “If I didn’t come when I did, you could’ve died. Was I just supposed to let that happen?!”

“Yes!”

“No!” You dropped his arm from around your shoulder and Peter B. went to pick up the slack. “Why is it so hard for you to understand that people care about you? You gave me a chance when no one else would. I lost my world, my home, and my friends. I couldn’t lose you, too.”

“That’s not for you to decide. I can’t trust you like an adult if you refuse to act like one,” he grunted, before wavering in his stance. Jessica helped right him.

You took a step back and pressed your lips together. “You know, I joined this team because I wanted to save people. I have the ability to save them. And… if you can’t acknowledge that ability, then… maybe you need to reevaluate your interests.” With that, you took off.

Jessica and Peter sat Miguel down to rest.

“How bad did I fuck up?” Miguel inquired.

“Give them a few minutes to sit on it,” Peter suggested. “Kids are like that. They need time to cool off. Just make sure you talk to them later.”

------

You sat on the slanted glass roof of HQ to listen to music and blow off some steam. Heavy footprints sounded from behind you. You sighed. “If you’re here to argue, can you at least wait until the end of this song?”

“I’m not going to argue with you. I wanted to talk. And… apologize.”

That piqued your interest, but you tried to sound nonchalant as you gestured to the space next to you. “Go ahead, then. Sit.” You turned the music off.

He obliged. “I’m sorry for saying that I couldn’t trust you and that you needed to act like an adult. It wasn’t fair. I do trust you, and there’s no reason for you to act like an adult when you’re still a kid. I’ll be more conscious of my words in the future.”

You nodded. “Thanks.”

You sat in silence for a while, and you began to get up.

“Wait,” he asked. “Please.”

“What did you really come here to say?”

“Just sit, and I’ll tell you.” He waited for you to return to your spot and took a deep breath. “When I was first messing with the multiverse after working at Alchemax, I wasn’t as careful as I am now. I found a world where I was dead, but had a daughter, so I replaced myself and began raising her. I loved her more than anything. But, I was an anomaly, and had disrupted canon events. I felt her glitch right out of my hands. Thousands of innocent people died that day because of me. So, I made a vow to myself: never again. I wouldn’t let this happen to anyone else, and I wouldn’t let anyone get close to me.”

He paused, gulped, and forced himself to make eye contact with you. “Then I met you. And I tried to hate you, I really did. But you’re funny, and you’re smart and passionate, and you have a damn good heart. And everything in me just wants to protect you. I’m so mad at myself for hurting you and-”

You cut him off with a bear hug, to which he slowly responded once he understood what was happening. You shed a few tears into the crook of his neck and mumbled, “I’m sorry, too.”

He laughed, partially in disbelief. “For what?”

“I called you a dick behind your back for the first three months because I thought you had a stick up your ass.” You backed away snickering and wiped your eyes. “But you’re more my family than my parents ever were.”

Now or never, Miguel.

“About that,” he began. “I know you’ve been staying at Gwen’s place - and you’re completely free to stay there if you want - I just thought it might be nice for you to have a permanent place to stay, a school to go to, a familiar face, you know?”

“Not really,” you expressed. “What do you mean?”

“I- it’s better if I just show you.” Miguel took a folder out of his bag and handed it to you. He looked the other way as you processed what he gave you.

“Are these adoption papers?”

“Um… yeah,” he relented, still refusing to look your way.

“And this isn’t a joke?”

“Of course not. But, it’s also up to you. I don’t want to pressure you into anything you don’t want to do-”

“Yes,” you cut him off and wrapped him in an even tighter hug. “Absolutely yes.”

------

Miguel helped you carry your few boxes of belongings that you had left at Gwen’s into his modern duplex.

“Jesus, dude,” you commented. “You didn’t tell me you were rich.”

He laughed. “This is what being a scientist earns you.”

“Damn.” You took the space in. The windows in the living room were from floor to ceiling, the couch a cool grey with ornate yellow and green pillows. Everything was open concept, and both the Mexican and Irish flag hung on either side of the TV. Aside from the occasional painting, the apartment was largely monochromatic.

“The kitchen is under that loft area, which I usually use as office space, but you’re free to use it, too. Bathrooms on first and second floors,” he explained while walking up the stairs. He stopped in front of the third door to the right. “This is your room.”

You gently pushed open the door. Miguel had prepared for your arrival intensely. A twin bed sat in the back left corner of the room, a desk in the back right. There was a wide panel of windows with shades and a nightstand with knick knacks. A mirror, bookshelf, decorative rug, and bean bag filled the empty space. A poster with a Spiderman symbol hung over your desk, and a smile fought its way onto your face.

“There’s a closet, too,” Miguel said proudly.

You opened the closet to find it fully stocked with casual, formal, and tactical clothing. “You did all of this for me?”

He smiled warmly. “Welcome home.”

------

It was the following year on Father’s Day, and you were waiting for Miguel to come home when you heard keys turning at the door.

“Hey,” you called from the kitchen island. “I made dinner for us. And we can watch that crappy comedy show that you like.”

He hung up his jacket and gave you a hug. “Thanks, sweetheart. How was it with your friends?”

“Pretty good. But it took an hour to get Miles out of that Famous Footwear. I swear that boy has enough sneakers to cover the Mediterranean. How was work?”

Miguel grabbed a plate and took a seat next to you. “Well, we finally figured out the malfunction in the control room. Hobie had been messing around with it for his own projects. Shocker, right? But other than that it was just a bunch of boring meetings.”

“Oh, I just remembered something.” You rushed upstairs to get a gift bag from your room and returned, out of breath. “I made this for you. It’s not much, but my job doesn’t start until July and I wanted to give you something, so…”

He removed the tissue paper to find a carefully knitted shawl with his suit designs on it. He remained speechless for a moment.

“What do you think?”

“I love it.”

“Really? Cuz I could get you something else if you’d prefer-”

“I love it,” he repeated, giving you a bear hug. “I’ll wear it all the time when the weather takes a turn.”

“I thought it might be useful for winter patrols,” you admitted.

“It will be. I know you don’t like getting too sappy, so let’s watch some TV, yeah?”

Halfway through an episode of the comedy show, you got up to use the bathroom. Miguel paused the show and admired your work on his shawl. When you came back, he was still staring at it as if he were examining each individual stitch.

“I’m back,” you said when he didn’t acknowledge you.

He hummed in response. “There’s something I’ve been meaning to tell you.”

You furrowed your brows, worried now. “Is something wrong?”

“No, not all, it’s just…” He ran his fingers through his hair. “I wanted to let you know that I would understand if you want to look into seeing if there’s any way to find your real parents. I love you and I want you here, don’t get me wrong, but if this is something you feel strongly about, I wanted to make sure you knew that my feelings wouldn’t be hurt.”

You stared at him for a while before bursting into laughter.

“What’s so funny?”

You grabbed his hands and looked him in his eyes. “I found my real dad the moment you brought me here. I’m home.”

He squeezed your hands and repeated your words as if convincing himself of the truth. “You’re home.”

------

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emojellyace08 · 9 months

Text

Lookism Men x Female Reader "Their types on a woman" (J-High Main boys)

A/N: Hi fellow human! Sorry if I hadn't made any posts this past few weeks, I was taking a break and my laptop isn't working properly. Anyway, the important thing is I'm back making more Lookism (especially Danny content), so enjoi! :) Genre: Fluff☁️and slight angst? (for everyone) Warnings: NONE! just pure cuteness and sweetness I guess? Add in!: this post is also inspired by another Lookism Men (J-High boys) with a female reader. Though I can't really remember the acc or post so I'll just paste it in here incase I find it :) I'll probably make a part 2 about this

Daniel Park (Park Hyung Seok)

This man will be the biggest simp in the whole world. Will always look at you with that puppy eyes like 🥺👉👈 halk;hkld;ahfkl;ahf I love him so much

It's canon (kind of) that Daniel doesn't give a damn about how you look like for the most part. What matters to him most is that you respect everybody and treat them equally. But since the incident with Yui kind of traumatized him from finding true love, it also left and taught him a good and knowledgeable lesson. Since Danny went through lots of character development, he learned to himself that he can't just trust someone who acts nice and that he needs to know someone better if he really likes someone.

If you already interacted with his main body and haven't judge him for his looks just like a normal person would do or if you met this cinnamon roll on middle school when he's still being bullied by that fucker Logan, if you had the balls to save him from that mf congratulations! You made him interested in you!

If you also helped him in his homework or if you insists to spend some time with him like going out to the mall, patching his bruises when the bullies beat him up or if he gets in trouble with the gangs, and helping him out like giving him advices on his worst days even on the tiny things, he'll be head over heels for you (though he stills feel guilty that you're spending your money on him but you keep reassuring him that is fine) But if you're also the broke girl he can empathize more since he also faces this issues like his mom forcing herself to work just for him. Rich or not, fat or slim, girly or tomboyish, if you're overall kind, unjudgmental yet completely honest, and generous not just to him (in both of his bodies of course) but also to everybody without wanting anything in return, then you earned this man's respect and heart ;). I also headcannon that he's more into quiet and calm women since he's easily overwhelmed by noisy people and places. But even if you're the type of extroverted woman or the introverted type, as long you're nice and helpful then you'll catch his attention.

I feel like after having his second body he'll start to have the confidence to befriend you. At first he wouldn't make things obvious since he's still shy about his feelings for you since he wants to know you even more as you show your true colors. He'll also probably going to ask some advice on Jace and Zack about approaching you since he doesn't have that much of a romantic experience xD. Since you always treat him, he'll ask you to hang out with him like going to the mall to watch movies or going to the park and eating on every food truck or stand you see but he'll bring some of your friends too like Zack, Jay, Mira, Zoe, even Vasco to hang out so things won't be obvious.

If he enjoys your company and the energy you have, he'll ask you out more but this time is just the two of you (if he has the budget). Or if you're in the same class/school as you, he'll always ask you out to eat with him on lunch too making all his fangirls jealous lol. "You want a piggyback? No problem! Need help from your homework? I'll help you out!" Or even if you don't study at the same school, he'll still ask you out privately and if you accept it Daniel would be the happiest man alive and him just being here for you every time even if he's broke or mentally unstable too lol like how you company him too. Overall just him being there for you and ready to help while being sweet (please I just need a Danny in my life lmao).

And since he's a really shy and introverted person, he's afraid of opening up about his issues and insecurities. But knowing that you're a sweet person yet you don't sugar-coat things (no pun intended), he will probably talk about it with you even when he's still afraid of him being a burden to you. But if you reached out to him first if you noticed when he's acting down and strange, he'll appreciate and love you even more. An example of this when he writes a letter to you when he ran away. Since he can't express his self with words, he decides to write his thoughts on a piece of paper while confessing his problems and probably his true feelings to you. "Y/N I don't know how to tell my thoughts in the first place but seeing Logan back when I try to run away from my problems just kills me inside. It may sound selfish to you but I felt like a burden for you and especially my mom. But I thank you for being there for me in my darkest times, when you help me out from those bullies and you don't judge me by my looks. Though I just need time for myself now. Please don't look for me. You're really a sweet and honest person and that's why I love you, and I mean it and not just for being a friend. Though I don't expect you to reciprocate my feelings it back. The larva that waits for years to be reborn as a cicada decides to return back to it's shell and to not spread it's wings. I'm sorry". You'll definitely going to cry while reading the letters and words written on the wrinkly paper if you're really close to him. As the time he returns back home just imagine hugging him and scolding him for running away. "JESUS CHRIST DANIEL! DON'T RUN AWAY LIKE THAT AGAIN YOU'RE SCARING ME!" you hugged his small and chubby form while you stain his clothes with your tears. "Y-Y/N I don't know what I was thinking. I-I'm sorry I won't do it again".

Just be a green flag in general to him whether size, shape or form he's in. And bonus points for you if you treat his mom well ;).

Zack Lee (Lee Jin Sung)

Another approved simp here lol. Like this man is fine tf, ehem excuse me back to the topic

I feel like this man is insecure deep inside his tough shell. He really worked hard for his strength and in boxing to protect his friends like Mira and Johan since the cult incident. So he wouldn't be different with you if he sees you as a valuable and good person.

And remember when he's still a notorious bully and many people were afraid of him? (tbh I really hate him before when he beat Little Daniel before) I headcannon that no matter how hard he tries to be ignorant from other's comments about him he actually feels bad about the horrible things he have done yet he's still hesitant at first to change since he felt vulnerable if he listens to other people's gossip about him. Why is this so angst this is supposed to be fluff :(.

So if you tried to approach him when you noticed Zack's face had a bruise he didn't even know he has when he got into a fight, he'll be annoyed by you at first as why your talking to him. Do you know that his heart is only devoted to Mira? (Not that you're aware of so calm down boy). "Who the hell are you? Do you know that I only love Mira! She's the most beautiful person on Earth and I just can't hit on you sorry!" He continues to ramble that he likes someone else until he became speechless as you patch him with the extra band aid that you have on your pocket, you tip-toeing to reach his height as your warm and soft hands make contact with his open wounds while he froze. "I'm just trying to help and clean off your wound y'know. Don't worry I'm not hitting on you" you replied coldly yet with the same sweet tone on your voice that just makes him melt. This can't be happening, he likes Mira! She's been his crush since childhood! So why is he feelings butterflies in his stomach whenever you're near him??? (I love Mira so much but ahhhhh) Are you not scared of him? He's literally a bully in your school yet you chose to help him.

The thing is just like Daniel's preferences, what he likes about you is that you're free-spirited, you're a sweet and gentle person, honest and you're willing to help others. You also help him out with his ego-issues while giving him some constructive criticisms to work on himself. It may be a little bit hurtful on his part but he knows deep inside that you're expressing your thoughts that others can't tell to him because they're scared that he'll misunderstood it and beat them. But coming those constructive criticisms from your soft voice calms him even more and you want to bring out the best of him on his attitude. It may look like he's not listening, but trust me if he really likes you he'll lend his ears and mind for you.

Like Daniel, he'll be hesitant about his feelings first about you. Not because his insecure about himself but because he's insecure about it. He may look like a bad person on other people's eyes, he's DEFINETLY NOT THE TYPE to double-time two women. He likes Mira. Yet when he sees you eating lunch alone or just sitting on your desk on class and being quiet and minding your own business, he wants to approach and talk to you. "Wait is Mira absent? I guess sitting with Y/N in lunch won't be a bad idea." And he'll probably talk about his feelings for you to her. He's scared that if he confessed to him and you don't like like him back and that he's also going to hurt the other girl's feelings. That's why he'll conversate with the brunette. And despite liking Zack too Mira will definitely try to understand on what he's trying to say and will 100% support both of you. And Zack will also dress to impress xD. He'll flex his accomplishments to you "Y/N do you know that I'm a professional boxer? I won lots of boxing competitions y'know" he boastfully said while winking at you and being proud of himself. "But I thought you lost to Johan Seo-" "SHUT UP JIHO!" And will take you on "friendly dates" and will try to change his bad habits for him to be a good influence to you (though he will beat the sh*t out of everyone who ever tries to mess with you, not caring if you'll lecture him later).

Overall be nice, patient, be honest and understanding to him. And also take care of Zacky and he'll reciprocate it back :).

Vasco (Lee Euntae)

If the other two are simps, this man will follow you like a lost puppy lol

You know Vasco is innocent despite his gangster-looking body and face. This boy likes animals especially puppies! This man will also get superrrr excited when he sees you walking on the park with your dog (Will 100% approach you with a cute smile even if he doesn't know you lmao. It may freak you out but I told you Eun Tae is innocent so be patient about it). "Hello! Is this your dog? He looks so cute!" "Oh yeah he's a golden retriever." "Like a chihuahua?" "Oh no. Chihuahua is smaller than a golden retriever" you chuckled lightly at the tattooed male while his eyes sparkled even more as he bended down to reach the dog's height while apologizing to you about his mistake which you shrugged it off saying that it's okay. "Hi little dog, oh I mean woof woof!" AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Since this man has zero percent romantic experience, he's literally going to fall fast for you. He will also introduce himself to you if you're not classmates or study at the same school since he's excited to have a girl friend (ehem) that likes animals too! If you also find him interesting and you gave him his number, he will tell everything to Jace and the other Burn Knuckles members about you all the time. "JACE! I TALKED TO A GIRL TODAY HER NAME IS Y/N!" "Vasco keep your voice do- wait. WHAT! YOU TALKED TO A GIRL!!!"

If he also notices about how you're a gentle and caring person and also likes helping others without wanting anything in return, he'll literally catch a crush on you. Being an animal lover will definitely makes you and Vasco make less tense with each other and have a very special connection with each other.

And if you also taught him to understood things in his surroundings, he'll definitely appreciate your help! You know how this man isn't really conscious on almost everything even on the little dirty things so when he doesn't know what he's doing wrong. So he'll really listen to you if you explain it to him in a detailed yet understandable statement! You don't have to be completely smart but you're intellectual thinking can also help him understand you way better. He'll also let you call him by his real name if you're really close to him. (Also I can imagine the Burn Knuckles crying and cheering when you and Vasco became a thing. Y'know the FBI cheering meme? And yes they will do the Invisible Charlotte on you lmao).

And you know how his sense of justice and helping people can also get him through hard situations sometimes? Yeah it makes you worried when his hero complex gets him in trouble despite just wanting to help others who can't defend themselves.

So imagine just patching and treating his wounds while lecturing him. "EUNTAE! YOU CAN'T JUST BE INVOLVED WITH FIGHTS EVERYDAY!" you scolded him while he tries to hold back him crying. He doesn't even know if he's going to burst down into tears because you're angry at him or because of the sting and pain he feels when the soft cotton made contact on his wounded skin. "S-So you-you're telling me that I can't defend the weak? They're literally getting bullied Y/N". you sighed as he misunderstood on what you're trying to imply while he sniffs as he can't control the liquid pouring out from his brown-colored orbs. You sat beside him as you made eye contact on his sad ones. "You know Euntae, I understood you. It's okay to help others but you can't just always get into fights with everybody. I'm worried for you y'know". "But the bad guys won't stop hurting the innocent if I don't stop them" he replied while feeling wretched. "Because that's the sad truth. But evilness has a reason to spread". "Why?" he asks innocently. "Because the world wouldn't be balanced if we don't make mistakes. We will be perfect like Gods but emotionless like robots. And the reason why evil is taking all over us is to open the eyes of others on how our own world and our own kind has become corrupted and to solve it is to help others. I have no problems of you helping out Vasco. But it makes me worried on what is going to happen to you." "That's why I'm trying to be stronger!" he cheered and stood up while his warm tears are still rolling down on his face. "It's to protect others and to protect you too Y/N!" you smiled at his optimistic thinking as you ruffled his hair making his heart skip a beat. "And that's what I like about you Lee Euntae".

Jay Hong (Hong Jae Yol)

A mixture of a simp and a puppy lmao.

I feel like he doesn't really fall in love so easily (unless it's Daniel lol)

Since Jay is also a quiet person (who literally doesn't talk), so I bet he can't stand whiny and noisy girls (lmao pls don't attack me). I think he prefers women (if it's women ;) who leans more on the quiet and gentle side yet is still fun to talk and be around with. Video games on his apartment, hanging out in the mall or talking about fashion styles and brands are his way to go dates.

It's canon that he buys expensive gifts and brands for someone he likes so just expect him to just gave you 4 bags full of clothes and jewelry that almost anybody can't touch and buy for themselves. But despite him buying you everything that you want, he still hopes that you just don't like him because he's hot, mysterious and rich. He really wants someone who values him not just by his looks and social status. But if simple signs of helpful gestures is enough for you like him helping you out on your homeworks when you're in struggle or if you need a shoulder to cry on then Jay will be available 100%.

If you decided to approach Jay first, it's completely normal for him to be a bit shy and tense in front of you. He can really caught the attention of many women because of his beautiful features and good taste on fashion style while the other dudes just stare at him with envy. But if you really want to make friends with anybody, talking to Jay can be a challenge. Not only is that he don't literally open his mouth, he can't help but to feel nervous when a girl or literally anybody who approaches him since he's not used to it. Though after befriending him out of pure innocence and not wanting anything from him, he'll start to be more open about his interests and Jay will start to be more caring about you and just be himself in front of you and everybody else.

Just like the rest of the dudes, your sweet and warm personality can break the ice between the two of you and if he's starting to like you even more than just a friend, his affection would be more and more obvious. He will also patch you up and clean your wounds when you get hurt and he'll beat the sh*t out of everyone who tries to mess and hurt you (just like the other three boys). But he won't let you know why your bullies/enemies look like they've been used as a punching bag. He's also willing to give you his whole wallet full of cash if you can't buy your lunch (he'll still force you to take it especially if he knows you're the broke type lol).

Will probably start to learn sign language and Morse code with you so you can understood each other more lol (and talk about dumb shit a lot that only the two of you will understand lmao). But if you can already comprehend on what he's trying to express, he'll appreciate it and fall for you more considering how his close friends and family are the only ones who at least understand on what he's trying to pick up. And listen to him when he's ranting about his problems even though there are no words coming out of his mouth. He might even let out a sad whimper and a huff when he tries to suppress his feelings since he doesn't want to be seen as a burden especially in front of someone whom he really cherishes.

Just be a green flag. Don't just use him as a sugar daddy or he won't be returning the sweet treatment and attitude back at you. Actions speak louder than words after all.

A/N: my first ever fluff to be written about and yeah sorry if this sucks.

#lookism x reader #lookism x y/n #lookism x you #daniel park x reader #jay hong x reader #zack lee x reader #vasco x reader #lookism manhwa #lookism webtoon #lookism fic

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waywardxwords · 6 months

Text

The Fix - Part Six

Summary: Everyone has a past, but yours seemed to haunt you. You've tried to move forward with a normal life, but the day comes when that's not possible anymore. When Sheriff Beau Arlen enters your life, you're certain he is going to judge you just like everyone else in town does. But something about Beau is different.

Warnings: Language, maybe some fluff *eye emoji*

Word Count: ~4.3k

Beau had called the FBI as he drove to the hospital, and then again when you and Bailey were in with the doctor. Everything had checked out—Bailey was unharmed. She was a little dehydrated, but otherwise, she was fine. She was scared and didn’t understand what had happened. You had assured her everything would be okay, but didn’t know how else to explain everything that had taken place with her father.

You sat in the back of Beau’s truck, your hands held tight to Bailey as you couldn’t bring yourself to let go.

“Are you sure you aren’t hurt anywhere?” You asked her as your hands danced over her head, her arms. Your eyes moved over every inch of her to look for any injuries.

“No, mama,” she said softly. “But I’m cold…and hungry.”

Beau heard her words and cranked up the heat in the truck. You thanked him softly. He reached for the duffel again and leaned back to say, “There’s a granola bar in there and trail mix. Water, too. Make sure she’s hydrated.”

You found the bar, the trail mix and water and opened the packages for her to eat. As she ate and Beau drove, you looked out the window. You weren’t sure where Beau was taking you at this point, but you knew it wasn’t in the direction of your home. It didn’t even matter, really. You were in a daze at this point and you were willing to admit that you wholeheartedly trusted Beau.

As if he could read your mind, Beau cleared his throat from the driver’s seat. “We’re heading to my office. They want to ask Bailey some questions.” His eyes moved between you and Bailey in the backseat. It was as if he anticipated your concern. “It’s gonna be alright. They want to try to see what she remembers while it’s fresh on her mind. We will both be there, and you’ll have eyes on her the entire time.”

It was as if Beau had stepped into your brain and carefully tended to each issue you had with this scenario.

“Who will be asking the questions?” You contemplated, silently hoping it might be Beau.

“They have an agent coming who works with kids,” he explained as he made the turn into the sheriff’s office parking lot.

“You can’t be the one to question her?” You asked.

He shook his head before he continued. “Sorry, darlin’. The FBI is managing it from here.” It felt like you hadn’t gotten the entire story, but you stayed quiet. Exhaustion had overcome you, but you felt like you couldn’t truly rest. There was no way to know what else might be out there—or who, rather. So instead, you sighed as Beau shifted into park and turned your attention to Bailey.

“Hey, B?” You started softly as you unbuckled her from her seat. “There are some people who want to talk to you about your…” you hesitated. Bailey hadn’t fully understood what she had endured, and you wanted to try your best to avoid traumatizing her any further. “About your adventure…” you settled on the wording. A quick glance to the rear view mirror, you saw Beau’s gaze on you. He gave you a small nod with a wink. “I want you to answer all of their questions, okay?”

“Okay,” she answered easily. Besides being hungry, tired and cold—she had seemed okay, all things considered.

“Thank you,” you breathed with a smile. You stepped out of the truck first, and reached in to help Bailey get out. You clutched her hand tightly as you followed Beau into the office.

Before he pulled open the glass door, Beau looked back at you. “You take issue with any question or any part of all this, and you tell me?” His eyes were firm with intent, but gentle in his delivery.

“Okay,” you agreed. He nodded once and then opened the door for you and Bailey to walk through, with him just a step behind you.

Immediately, you recognized the man in a suit in the lobby as Matt Donahue, the FBI agent who had been working on Jackson’s case. He approached you with a serious look on his face, and his eyes moved over Beau just behind you. He looked less than pleased. Behind him, there was a woman in a similar black suit. She stepped around the man you recognized and offered you a small, but warm, smile.

“Hi, I’m Agent Stephanie Michaels,” she introduced and put her hand out to shake yours. You offered her your name, and shook her hand gently. “And you must be Bailey.” She widened her smile and knelt down just in front of your daughter.

You felt Bailey’s hand that you weren’t holding grip onto your denim jacket as she melded her body to your side. “Hi,” her voice was just as small as she was.

“You can call me Stephanie, or Steph…whichever you prefer,” she grinned. “Hey, I have some cool toys and coloring books in this room over here. Would you want to color with me for a little bit?”

Bailey looked to you for reassurance. The idea of her being anywhere away from you–even if you were in the literal sheriff’s office–made you feel sick to your stomach. Your eyes traveled to Beau’s. You looked to him for the same reassurance your daughter had looked to you for, and there was something about that which felt different. All of your life, you had always felt so sure of yourself and the decisions you made. When you first became a mother, you weren’t so sure anymore–motherhood had made you question everything about yourself, but with time, you had become very sure of your decisions as they pertained to Bailey.

Beau offered a small smile and a nod, and somehow, that was enough for you.

“Go ahead, bug,” you smiled down at her with the nickname you had called her from birth. Your hand smoothed down over the top of her head and rested on her cheek. “I’ll be just outside in the other room. If you need me, you just tell Stephanie, okay?”

She nodded and looked back at the agent before she dropped your hand and followed her into the interrogation room. As soon as the door closed, you felt your breath hitch in the back of your throat and your heart raced. The burn of anxiety crept up your neck and settled into your cheeks.

And then you felt a hand on the small of your back. “It’s gonna be alright, we’re going to watch from the other side,” his timing was impeccable. Your eyes found Beau’s with a small glance over your shoulder.

Words failed you as your throat had tightened, so you just nodded in response. Beau gingerly led you to the room that shared a wall with the interrogation room they were in. The room was dark, but there was a large glass window that looked into the room Bailey and Stephanie had ventured into. You knew the other side simply showed a mirror and Bailey would never know you were there. Matt followed you in, as well.

Stephanie had brought with her various toys and activities that a child would enjoy–there were Barbie dolls, baby dolls and coloring books. “What would you like to play with, Bailey?” She asked softly. You liked her. You didn’t like the situation you were in, but you felt safe with her. Stephanie was slowly shifting your opinion on FBI agents, and you realized she was the perfect person to work with kids in the line of work she was in.

“Um…I like Barbies! I have this one at home,” Bailey quickly reached for one of the dolls.

“Okay, great! I can be this Barbie here,” Stephanie reached for a different doll and the two started playing.

“Hey,” Beau murmured from behind you. “I’m going to grab a coffee quick, would you like one?” He asked as you glanced back at him.

A smile tugged at your lips. “That would be great,” you sighed.

“How do you take it?” He asked. There was something about the way he was looking at you, but you couldn’t quite put your finger on it.

“Two cream, two sugar, please,” you smiled, appreciative. He nodded as he stepped outside the room and closed the door behind him.

You turned your attention back to Stephanie and Bailey. Stephanie was currently encouraging Bailey to act out what had transpired over the last day through the Barbie dolls. It was a challenge–Bailey had a wild, but beautifully creative, imagination. You knew it would take a little time to get her to talk through what they needed from her.

Matt cleared his throat next to you after a moment. “Can I ask you a question?” He kept his eyes on the glass for a second, but then turned to look at you.

“Sure,” you hesitated, but knew he was probably going to ask either way.

“What’s your relationship with the sheriff?” His eyes studied you, his jaw tense. His question completely blindsided you, which was probably obvious from your furrowed brows and the way your eyes widened.

“Excuse me?” You asked him incredulously.

“I’m curious. Friends? Family? More than that? I’m just trying to wrap my head around why the hell a sheriff–an interim sheriff, mind you–would go through so much trouble stepping all over the FBI on a case that’s miles above his pay grade,” he was blunt. “Especially a man who is trying to prove he’s the right guy to be the permanent sheriff in this town.” You knew what the answer was–you and Beau didn’t have any kind of relationship–but you were startled by the question and why he would ask in the first place.

“There is no relationship between Beau and I,” you explained slowly. “Listen, I know he caused some trouble for you and I’m sorry for that. He was trying to keep me safe and find my kid, which–by the way–I felt like the FBI couldn’t care any less about. You all were so gung-ho on finding Jackson, so Beau stepped in to help me find Bailey.”

Matt frowned again. “While yes, that was insanely frustrating, that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about how Beau wouldn’t back down today. This interview was supposed to take place on FBI territory. He downright refused…he said we couldn’t talk to Bailey anywhere but here. And that you had to be present at all times.”

You blinked once, then twice as you processed what he said. Beau had fought, yet again, to keep you and Bailey safe and comfortable.

“He what?” You finally breathed.

“That’s why I asked. I figured you must be family or he must seriously care about you,” Matt looked back at the glass but you stayed silent as your mind tried to work through this new information.

Meanwhile in the small office kitchen, Beau watched as the dark colored liquid slowly began to trickle into the pot on the coffee maker. He found himself lost in thought as the pot slowly filled, but was interrupted when someone cleared their throat from behind.

“You’re playing a dangerous game, Beau,” she sighed. Beau turned to see one of his investigators, Cassie Dewell, lean against the countertop behind him.

“I’m not sure what you’re talking about,” Beau looked back to the coffee as it continued to trickle.

Cassie rolled her eyes and pushed herself away from the counter to step closer to Beau. “You’re really going to take on the FBI? The big dogs who call all the shots? Do you want to be unemployed?” She sighed. Beau’s eyes found hers. She was concerned for him, and he appreciated it. But the thoughts and feelings he had swirling in his head over the last day had made it difficult for him to think clearly about anything.

“My job is to protect the people in this town,” he said very clearly. “She just got her daughter back, Cassie. You want me to send them to some strange place where they’re forced to be separated? You think Bailey’s gonna want to answer any questions that way? I wouldn’t,” he scoffed but redirected his attention to grab two styrofoam cups from the cupboard.

“This is something else…this is different, Beau,” she dropped her voice to a gentle whisper as she watched his movements.

He didn’t need Cassie to say the words to know that she was right. “I’ve always been so good at keeping my head on straight when it comes to work,” he didn’t want to open up to Cassie; he hadn’t even wanted to address his thoughts or feelings internally yet. But he spoke on it anyway. “But this has been different. It’s almost like when…” he stopped himself as he stared at the styrofoam cups.

“Like when Emily was missing?” Cassie answered for him.

His eyes found hers again and he felt his throat tighten, which only made him somewhat frustrated. “I don’t wanna talk about it, Cassie. I hear you, I know I need to tread carefully but I also wanna make sure I’m doing what’s best for the people in this town.”

“The people in this town, or–” Beau cut her off before she could say anything else.

“They are two people who live in this town,” he said firmly. “And right now, they need my help.”

“Alright, alright,” she held her hands up in surrender. “I’m just encouraging you to stop pissing off the FBI, okay? We kinda like having you here. It would be really shitty if you got fired.” She offered a small smile to ease some of the tension their conversation had created.

Beau nodded and looked back at the pot where the coffee was ready.

“Thanks,” he grinned in return. “I’ll do my best.”

Hours had passed–the agents had ordered pizza as a late lunch (or early dinner, even) for you and Bailey. Bailey had given some additional information (it had just been her and Jackson on their “adventure”, she hadn’t seen anyone, and her father hadn’t treated her poorly but he seemed “different”). You knew that meant Jackson had been out of his mind while he was with Bailey, which made you feel sick again, but also thankful that she was alright.

Finally, Stephanie and Matt had determined there were no other questions they needed to get answered, and they said you were free to go.

Their words hung in the air as you stood before them. Free to go. You didn’t know what that meant. You didn’t feel like you could possibly return to your home. While you felt sure that Bailey hadn’t been exposed to any drug dealers or criminals, you couldn’t be so sure that they weren’t still going to look for you. With Jackson in jail, your brain had already processed that there could be people looking for collateral or to send a message. You weren’t an idiot; you knew the FBI would try to get Jackson to rat out the people he had worked with–they were looking for the big dogs, and Jackson wasn’t one of them.

“You alright?” Beau asked after the agents left. Bailey had curled up on a chair in the lobby–she was exhausted and needed to get to bed.

“Y-yeah,” you stumbled over the word, but offered him a smile anyway. “It just feels weird, you know? Just that it’s all over–like that’s it,” you sighed. “I’m grateful, don’t get me wrong. It just feels strange.”

Beau’s eyes studied you again–it was something he seemed less afraid to do the longer you were around him. Surprisingly, it didn’t make you uncomfortable–you just didn’t want him to see all of the feelings passing through you: fear, anxiety, overwhelming worry.

“Listen, I don’t want to overstep,” Beau eyed Bailey who was quickly beginning to fall asleep behind you on the lobby chair. “But if you’d like, you and Bailey can stay with me tonight. You two can take my room and I’ll get some shut eye on the couch.”

“Oh, no Beau,” you said quickly, though something inside of you was telling you to say yes. “We’ve put you out long enough. I’m not going to ask you to do that.”

“You didn’t ask,” his voice was a low murmur–the lowness made it so much more raspy than normal and it sent a shiver down your spine so that the little hairs on your neck stood to attention. “I’m offerin’. And I wouldn’t offer if I didn’t mean it. Truthfully, I would feel better if you stayed with me. Otherwise, I’m gonna be up all night worryin’.”

You nodded and nibbled on your bottom lip as your eyes trailed over Bailey. You knew deep down you wouldn’t sleep, either, if you were alone with her at home. You’d be sitting with a kitchen knife by her bedside all night–and you hadn’t slept in so many hours, as it was.

“Alright,” you practically whispered. “If you’re sure.” A smile tugged at the corners of his lips and he nodded his head in agreement.

The drive to Beau’s home was silent–the only sound came from the rumble of his truck engine. Bailey slept peacefully against your side as you played aimlessly with her hair. The sun was pulling down behind the mountains now, and you had to think about what day it was. It had been the most exhausting, terrifying day of your life. The only thing keeping you upright was thinking about how you didn’t want Bailey out of your sight for even a moment.

The truck came to a stop just outside Beau’s trailer and he shifted into park.

Very gently, you unhooked your seatbelt and leaned over Bailey to do the same. Beau stepped out of the truck and opened the door closest to Bailey.

“I can…” he hesitated and his eyes watched you closely before he glanced down at Bailey and held his arms out to show you he could carry her. He knew you had been in mama bear mode for a long time, and he wasn’t going to make any sudden movements.

“Oh, you don’t have to,” you whispered back.

“I don’t mind, I just don’t want ya to claw out my jugular,” he half chuckled. Your cheeks reddened and you smiled.

“It’s fine, you can carry her in,” both you and Beau realized that was your sign of ultimate trust—like a cat or dog showing you their belly. You trusted him with your kid, and that spoke volumes.

He nodded once and very gently lifted her off of the seat and to his chest. You got out of the truck and followed him to the door.

“Uh, any chance you could…” he hesitated for a moment.

“Oh! Right, keys. Where are they?” You eyed his jacket pockets to see which one they might be in.

He cleared his throat. “Jeans, back pocket.” You swallowed the lump that had suddenly formed in your throat. You hesitated for a moment. “They won’t bite, darlin’.” You could hear the smirk in his voice.

With a quick roll of your eyes, you carefully reached into his back pocket and pulled the keys out. “Sorry,” you murmured as you scooted by him on the step to open the door. You found the key and slipped it into the lock, opening the door with ease.

“I’m gonna lay her down on the bed in the back,” he nodded back to, what you assumed was, his bedroom. You followed closely behind as he gently placed her on the bed. “I think she’ll be warm back here, but here’s an extra blanket.” He reached to the dresser and handed you a quilt.

“Thanks,” you breathed as you carefully covered her up. You reached down and smoothed her hair away from her forehead. The sound of Beau’s boots retreating down the hall made its way to your ears. You couldn’t help but smile at Bailey sleeping soundly—safe. Your lips pressed to her forehead and you closed your eyes; she still smelled of the woods and the hospital, but you wouldn’t wake her for anything right now. A bath could wait. She was back, and she was okay.

After a moment, you followed Beau’s footsteps to the front of the camper.

You realized he had stepped outside and left the door ajar. The cool air from the Montana sky sent a chill over you, and you realized you still had on the denim jacket from the day before, a thin long-sleeve top and jeans. It would have to do.

As you stepped silently on the top step, you noticed Beau had started a fire. It wasn’t strong yet, but he poked at it to get the flame to grow. As you watched his profile in the orange glow of the fire, your heart fluttered. Your mind flashed back over the last day, and all the moments you had experienced with Beau:

The way he trusted that you didn’t know where Jackson was, but wanted to scan your place quickly to make sure he wasn’t there just a few days before. To keep you safe.

The way he dropped everything when you finally used his number to come to you when Bailey went missing.

The blatant disregard he had for the FBI when they said they had it handled; it wasn’t a power play, it was because he wanted to fix this.

The way he held doors open for you, made sure you were being protected (and when he wasn’t sure the deputies or agents could handle it, he showed up to protect you), the way he spoke to you when you shared the abuse you had endured, the way he stayed calm when Jackson finally showed up so you could still try to find Bailey, the way he touched your face…and in that moment, everything clicked.

Beau felt the weight of your gaze and turned back to look at you from over his shoulder.

“Uh oh,” he chuckled. “Why’re you lookin’ at me like that, darlin’?” He seemed almost nervous as he stood to face you.

“Beau…” your throat felt dry, but what you had to say simply couldn’t wait. “Did you push back on the FBI today about where they would interrogate Bailey? And make it so that I could be there?”

He was silent for a moment. He brought his hand up to the back of his neck and rubbed at the tension there to try and find inspiration on something to say. “I may have done that,” he said softly. “I wanted to make sure I could control the situation, just in case. I don’t trust that Donahue agent, and I didn’t know anything about the woman they wanted Bailey to talk to…” his voice trailed off as you walked towards him off of the steps.

A different kind of fear bubbled in your throat–this fear was around rejection or the disappointment of misreading someone, but you couldn’t take it anymore. You stood just inches in front of him, your face tilted upwards so you could look into his eyes.

“Who am I to you, Beau Arlen?” The words from Agent Donahue had repeated in your head for the last few hours, but you never thought you’d get the courage to ask Beau directly.

He was silent again, allowing the fear to boil at this point. Your heart raced like it had for the last day, albeit for different reasons. But then his gaze moved over your face from your nose, to your lips, to your eyes once more.

“You’re a mother–a damn good mother, might I add,” he started softly. “You’re a stubborn-as-hell woman, who doesn’t follow any kinda rules or direction. You’re someone who’s been through hell but you don’t wear a chip on your shoulder for it.” His voice was low and the rasp was back–you felt weak in the knees, but you couldn’t be sure if that was from what he was saying or the pure exhaustion that drenched you from head to toe. “And for whatever goddamn reason…I don’t care who I gotta go against when it comes to you and your kid. Including the FBI.” He added on. You swallowed to try and clear the dryness from your throat. He paused for a moment before he smirked.

You glimpsed between his eyes and mouth once, twice…and then without missing a beat, Beau’s hands gripped just above your elbows. He pulled you flush against his chest and you felt the warmth of his lips on yours. He pulled back after just a moment to study your gaze.

“Sorry ‘bout that,” he muttered as he closed his eyes shut tightly, as if he had just made a mistake. You read his features and brought your hand to his cheek to turn his face to meet your gaze.

“If you don’t kiss me again, Beau Arlen…” your voice fell in a whisper as you teased, but your eyes told him you were serious.

Carefully, and painfully slowly, Beau’s hands found your hips and he tugged you to him before you both closed your eyes and your lips found each other once more.

A/N: Thank you SO MUCH for reading (and for being patient--this one ended up being a bit longer than my usual chapters, so I hope that makes up for this being late!).

I hope I did this chapter justice. I would love to know what you thought! As always, thanks for reading, liking, commenting, and sharing!

New installments are posted on Wednesdays and Saturdays! Just a few more parts left in this story, I think...unless I get some crazy idea (which is always possible, hah).

A preview of the next chapter:

The fire had roared to life by now, with you and Beau settled on two camping chairs positioned so close together there was an overlap. There hadn’t been too many words spoken yet, but his hand held yours reassuringly in his lap as your eyes watched the flames and your bodies absorbed the warmth. The trailer door was left ajar, just in case Bailey woke up and called for you.

Your eyes wandered to his profile and you couldn’t help but stare. “Starin’ ain’t polite, darlin’,” he drawled with a tired smile. His head turned to look at you–his eyes almost lazy at this point.

“Sorry,” your cheeks reddened once you had been caught. “I just couldn’t help myself.”

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andhumanslovedstories · 8 months

Note

hello this is kind of heavy and no pressure at all to answer. and apologies because im sure you must have answered this before. but do you go through like a pain management flow chart for your patients and if so what are some of the steps? my dad is having some medical issues and i want to be able to help him manage his pain as much as i can. thank you and enjoy wasteland!

I work in a hospital setting so my pain management care plan is part of an interdisciplinary team in that setting. It's relatively easy for me to get, say, IV pain meds for a patient with extreme breakthrough pain. I don't know how well my approach would translate outside of that setting, I'm not palliative care trained, and I don't personally deal with chronic or acute pain (which is why I'm answering this publicly so other people can chime in), but in broad strokes:

First: Define pain. What type of pain is it? Muscle pain? Indigestion? Neuropathy? Surgical site? Stiffness from lack of movement? Is part of the pain also the fear of the pain? Sometimes when pain has been bad for a long time, or even has been bad in a short-term but very notable way, the idea of hurting that bad again is traumatizing. That fear of pain can, unfortunately, make you focus more on the pain you're feeling because now it's not just the physical sensation of pain, it's also the psychological impact of it.

Then, how does the pain affect you? Is it stopping you from sleeping? Is it stopping you from eating? Is it making you short-tempered or depressed? Does it make it difficult to focus on things? Does it make you nauseated? Anxious? Isolated? Do you feel like you need to hide it from those who care about you?

Everything pain is and affects is a place where you can intervene. Some of these interventions will be very small and would, if they were the only intervention, feel completely inadequate. Pain relief is rarely "you do one thing and you're done." You're addressing pain on multiple fronts, and sometimes that doesn't mean your focus isn't just the reduction of pain but the restoration of what pain has taken away. It's possible the worst part of pain for you isn't the pain itself but, for example, the immobility it causes. Are there different ways you can learn to move? Can you get a grabber? Can you get a shower chair? Can you find physical therapy exercises that help you regain strength or stop you from deconditioning to the degree you're able? What mobility aids might restore movement to you?

And if returning mobility is not possible at this time or ever, how can you modify your environment to support you? Can you figure out what bothers you the most about that immobility and mitigate that? If it's annoying that not being able to leave bed makes you bored, what can be within arm's reach? If it's frustrating that being too painful to move means you feel isolated from other people, can you make wherever you are more central? If pain makes having your bed on the second floor unfeasible, can you move your bed to the first floor? How can you adapt the environment around you?

I'd encourage movement too, to the degree it is possible. Being in the same position HURTS. If it feels good to stretch but you can't do it by yourself, can someone help you with range of motion? (You can look up "passive range of motion" to get an idea of how to do that.) This doesn't need to be exercising, just exploring the joy of moving your body. Related to movement is physical touch. I love lotions and medicated creams for pain patients because you can turn them into massages. Just be careful with pressure and be open about what hurts and what feels good. At the most gentle end of the spectrum is something called the M Technique which isn't even massage, it's like guided gentle touch. Give the body something else to feel.

Different medications work better with different types of pain. This part is hard to talk about in general because of the specificity of some pain med regiments. Tylenol is great, but be cautious with how much you are taking (acetaminophen overdoses are no joke) and remember that there's a point where more tylenol doesn't mean more pain relief. Opioids are great, but they can be very dangerous and aren't well-indicated for a lot of types of chronic pain. Even if opioids work best, I'd encourage you to be working on pain reduction on multiple fronts, as opioids are so controlled, it is easy to lose access to them. If opioids give you enough pain relief to do physical therapy, then make sure to do that physical therapy. Medications are amazing and I love them and I give out PRNs like crazy, but similarly to how I can't just take my depression meds and stop being depressed, pain medication works best in conjunction with other strategies. Those other strategies though can literally be something like "tramadol takes away the pain enough I can focus on something, and what I want to do with that focus is to watch a movie I've been meaning to rewatch for a while now but haven't had the spoons for." Sometimes all you will want to do when you get pain meds is sleep because you can't when you're hurting. Sleep is wonderful; how can you arrange your sleeping place and habits to make sleeping even more of a delight?

And if you find a medication that works, use it consistently. It is always easy to keep pain level than it is to address a pain spike. Don't wait until symptoms are at their worst to address them. Figure out what it feels like when your symptoms are ramping up, and intervene early.

Sometimes medications that aren't explicitly for pain can still help. If anxiety makes pain worse, consider an anxiety medication. If coughing hurts, can you get a numbing spray from your throat to make it less sensitive so you cough less?

I don't know how useful this is to you and your family. Hopefully it's at least something to think about. Think about palliative care (which is about the management of symptoms of illnesses rather than the treatment of illnesses) as not just taking away bad sensations but restoring good ones. You can't always get someone to a place with no pain. But what can you do to enhance life in the presence of that pain? There is a psychological aspect to pain, it's a parasite that drains you and makes you feel like you are nothing but a body that hurts and won't stop hurting. I want to make clear, I'm not saying pain is only in your mind. Bone mets and nerve pain exist whether you're cheerful about it or not. But pain doesn't have to mean suffering, it doesn't have to take away the things that make you you. Address pain through medication and therapies, but also remember that protecting, promoting, and prioritizing the parts of yourself that you most value and give you the most joy will help give your life so much substance that pain can't rob it all. You aren't doing one big thing. You are doing a thousand small things that make life easier, better, more suited to yourself and your abilities, and more aligned with the parts of life that you that give your life meaning.

(And a note in particular for being the family member of someone in pain--ultimately, they are going through this alone. It is their body. What can you make smoother for them? How can you protect their dignity and their privacy without making them feel abandoned or alone? How can you make it so your reaction to their pain is not part of their burden? Like for the six hundred other hypothetical questions in this endless post, the answers will be highly personal and will take time to figure out. Be patient and calm.)

#nursing tag #oops! sorry! it’s an essay with I think no definite answers for you #and also an extrapolation of my in hospital work and my home health work #long post

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lokisprettygirl · 8 months

Text

Brokenhearted (Daemon Targaryen x Female Reader) (Non Canon Modern AU) (18+)

Read Chapter 15 here // Series Masterlist

Chapter 16

Summary : Daemon's love and care has made your life easier post accident, however you can't help but feel that he's not being entirely truthful to you.

Warning: 18+, Smut, violent thoughts, stalking, Discussion of mensuration and Pregnancy, bloodshed, kidnapping, Abusive relationship, mention of rape, ptsd, toxic masculinity, gender norms, sexual abuse, Samantha, traumatic distressing content, Daemon is a big time smoker so if it’s something triggering don’t read it, alcohol drinking, mention of past trauma and therapy, cigarette smoking, possessive behaviour, violence, baby needs therapy, baby is trying

It had been two weeks since you returned home from the hospital. Daemon had practically moved in with you, and it felt like he had always been there. There was no official discussion, no grand gesture. You just found a luggage full of his stuff in your room one morning and none of you said anything about it. He was taking such good care of you that this whole traumatic incident didn't feel like the worst thing that had ever happened, even though it actually was the worst experience you had ever been through in your life.

You still had the recurring nightmares and you used to see a therapist before for anxiety issues so Daemon got in touch with her and she was visiting you as well to help you deal with the aftermath of the trauma the accident had left behind.

There was just one problem, just one tiny problem, you had this ugly sinking feeling in your gut that he was hiding something from you.

Everytime he left the center, he came home almost an hour later, which didn't make sense to you because it was merely a twenty minute drive. Viserys had told you that maybe he was going to his condo but when you had asked him the same he had denied doing so. He had told you that Samantha was there and he didn't want to see her under any condition.

The next evening you had your friends over at your apartment so when Daemon came back from work, he was already a bit distracted and seeing a group of ladies just lounging in your apartment was a bit of a surprise for him. You knew you had to introduce them to each other at some point so that's what you did. Once they left he sat down on the couch next to you and kissed you softly before he slumped onto the couch.

"Tired?" You asked him softly as you raised your right hand to caress his scalp,

"No..but that feels good…keep going" you smiled as he said that. You couldn't understand how he wasn't tired, he trained himself and the new guys that turned up at the center and he was basically your caretaker for the rest of the day, taking care of your diet and medicines that you needed and were too careless to take on time.

"You had fun i see" he mumbled, making you smile, it was nice to see your friends. You always enjoyed gushing about the guys you were seeing with them but Daemon was not just some guy, he was the love of your life.

Next day as he came home he found you in the kitchen trying to do whatever you can with one capable hand and you felt his eyes on the nurse Sally who was also a bit worried about the whole situation but more than that she feared his wrath for allowing you to do this.

"Stop glaring at her, I insisted, I practically forced her to let me do this" you told him so he sighed and rubbed his forehead with his hand before he spoke.

"You can leave for the day" he told Sally so she immediately scurried off as soon as she could.

"You scare people, you know that?"

"Good. What are you doing hmm? You're supposed to be resting so you could heal" he stood behind you and hugged you like that with his arm secured around your waist and chin down on your shoulder "You're making Cheese Burger"

"Yeah well i was going to surprise you but you are early today"

He didn't say anything for a few seconds and then he just placed a soft kiss on your cheek. He was early because he had decided to not feed Samantha today, she was difficult to break but he wasn't going to give up. He had come so far to take a step back now. He had left a candy bar on the bed yesterday though, even though he wanted to be as cruel as possible he couldn't actually bring himself to be that way.

"You are magnificent darling, if i could.. I'd just fuck you right about now" he mumbled in your ears and it made you feel all tingly.

"Well you absolutely can, you choose not to"

"Husshh"

After eating while he was in the shower, you received a call from the owner of Cuisine waves telling you that they were hiring someone else in your place because they couldn't hold your job any longer. When Daemon stepped out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist and found you crying with your head smushed in the pillow he was immediately right next to you,

"What is it hmm?" He asked you firmly even though he was a bit terrified.

"I lost my job..they fired me" you mumbled between your sniffles and the sight made him tear up but there was also a small smile on his face

"That's it..that is what is making you bawl my silly girl?" He asked softly so you glared at him.

"I liked working there…I felt.. comfortable..i was there for four years for a reason" you sniffled again like a baby so he wiped your tears and kissed you.

"Yeah?? felt comfy there huh?" You nodded as he questioned you and then he pampered you all day long to comfort you.

Two days later you discovered that he had bought the diner and hired you back in your previous position. You didn't know whether to cry from the sweet sentimental gesture or be infuriated by his impulses. At the end you decided to cry indeed because you knew you'd never treat him the way Samantha did. He did something nice for you in the hope that it would make you happy and feel better so you weren't going to go all mommy on him and tell him that he needed to spend his money wisely. Also, he knew better about financial management than you did.

A week later while you were alone with Sally, she had received a call informing her about a family emergency and she asked you if she could leave so you didn't really think much of it and allowed her to go. When Daemon came home he was furious you could tell but he didn't really snap at you, no, he waited for a day, kept his anger bubbling until he saw Sally again and snapped at her instead.

However once he noticed the tears in her eyes he calmed down and strictly told her to not be so careless about your safety and inform him first if she had to go somewhere.

After she had left for the day, you were watching Daemon huffing and puffing still, cursing at every little inanimate object that seemed to have irked him somehow. He even had an argument with his hair brush for not being able to get rid of his tangles.

"Come here"

You mumbled softly so he grunted and then eventually walked towards you.

"What?" He asked you as he carefully got on top of you with one of his knees between your legs and the other on the left side of your thigh.

You curled your fingers around his neck and pulled him closer to kiss him, his body was stiff at first but soon he melted with your touch. As your hand wandered down he grabbed it swiftly and pulled away to look at you.

"What are you doing?"

"You know what I am doing"

You struggled against his hold so he allowed your hand to wander lower and you slipped it under the waistband of his trouser but he grabbed it again.

"Noo"

You halted in your tracks as he said that, you had to know what he was feeling, you had to be careful with him after everything he had been through.

"Is that a no in the sense that 'Stop it I'm uncomfortable' or no as in 'I want it but I'm scared I'm going to hurt you'

His brows crinkled as you said that and he placed his forehead down on yours,

"The latter ofcourse..I can't do this love..half of your limbs are broken and you know how I get when I'm fucking you" you bit on your lips as he said that. Your eyes were glittering with different emotions,

"When did you start to love me this much?" He narrowed his eyes at the question,

"Don't get too cocky"

"Okay but I never said anything about fucking now did i? Let me just.." You mumbled as you took his cock out and gave it a few strokes, he was already hard just from the close proximity and sexual whispering in his ear "You have been so grumpy.. let me fix that"

His breathing got heavier as you worked him up and down slowly.

"Look into my eyes" your tone was sharp so he glared at you and grabbed your chin with his fingers.

"Don't talk to me like that"

"Mmmm sorry..look at me dae pleaseee"

He kissed you deeply and passionately before he did what you had asked him to, his knee that was settled between your legs had inched closer to your heated core and as he pressed it right against your damp soaked clothed flesh you let out a loud gasp,

"You need this too don't you?" he snickered as your hips gyrated against his knee.

"Of Course i do ..it's been months, the last time I touched myself was night before the accident"

"And what were you thinking of when you pleasured yourself?"

"I thought about you and how good it would feel to have your fingers playing with me instead of mine"

His finger slipped under the waistband of your shorts and panties at once as he rubbed your wet dripping lips ,

"Mmm spread your leg darling, only one of them is broken..the other one works well" he commanded in an authoritative tone and the gravel in his voice made you moan,

"Gosh I miss this side of you Daemon "

"I know you do, pampering isn't enough for you is it? You need to be put in your place once in a while"

"Mmm yesss sir..I wish I could suck on your cock, drink all of the cum you're going to spill on me"

He moaned at your words and he really wanted to please you but the way you worked him up with your touch and your filthy words were making him lose all his inhibitions, he unbuttoned your shirt until your breasts were exposed and then his mouth sucked and nipped on the erect buds while his thumb rubbed in circles over your clit and middle finger curled inside your warmth.

You didn't really need much stimulation, you have been craving his touch for months now so when you came so suddenly he was only pleased with himself. His fingers were soaking wet as he pulled them out of you, looking right in your eyes he licked them all at once into his mouth, the way his full soft lips wrapped around his own digits was the most erotic sight you had ever witnessed in life.

The ecstatic look on his face gave you enough indication that he was close and you wanted to feel it all on you, you wanted to feel his warm cum on your skin.

"Cum all over me dae…please" your whiny begging voice pushed him over the edge and he aimed for your breasts as he let go, covering every inch of your tits in his glistening cum. The constant whisper of your name as he rode through his high was enough to turn you on again.

"Feeling better?" You asked him in a sheepish manner but he kissed you in response instead of answering and got off the bed to clean the mess he had made on you, once he was done he buttoned up your shirt.

"Was I too rough?" He asked you softly so you smiled,

"Noo come here" you opened your arms, well one arm to be precise, so he sighed before he leaned down and rested his head on your chest

"What's bothering you baby?"

"Nothing I'm just worried about you"

"I'm okay now..I'll be okay"

"I know I just…I'm being stupid'

"No you're not..you're adorable like this"

"Shut up"

"Mmmhhm'

When you woke up from the nap he wasn't there in the bed with you so you called out for him but when he didn't answer you picked up your phone and called him instead

"Darling you up?" He asked you

"Yess where are you?"

"At my condo..had to grab a few of my things" he said and you felt worried thinking about him being alone there with her.

"Ummmm okay..is she there?"

"Yeah" he mumbled as he looked at Samantha, all tied up in chains and bound on the bed still,

"Okay be careful baby and come back soon okay?"

Well he wasn't the one that had to be careful anymore.

"Will be there in a flash i promise"

"I love you" you mumbled softly so he smiled.

"I love you"

Once you hung up, he got up from the chair and walked towards Samantha to take the duct tape off her mouth and she immediately began to hurl verbal abuses towards him which didn't impress him at all, it's not that he hadn't heard her creative words before. He sat back down on the chair and glared at her for a moment before he spoke,

"All of this can end Samantha, you know that right? All you have to do is prove to me that you'd confess for your crime"

"I have given you my word you bastard" she yelled at him so he let out a sound of disapproval. He didn't trust her at all.

"But I don't believe you ..I don't trust you to not change your mind"

"Daemon if I die here you'd be in prison forever..is that what you want?"

"Well at least you'd be dead ey?" He smiled and her eyes welled up in tears of anger and hurt at the same time "Don't fret though, you think I'd let you get away so easily after what you have done to her? Just a slow torturous death? No no no no" He snickered as he leaned into his chair

"I want to watch you rot in prison sweetheart"

You were on the bed waiting for Daemon to come home, being almost bedridden wasn't fun to say the least, sure you were getting to spend plenty of time with him but when he wasn't there you felt absolutely alone.

"Where is the stuff?" You asked him as he entered the room all empty handed.

"In the car..ummm in the backseat of the car" he mumbled as he took his hoodie off and his shirt followed, you were only getting pudgier everyday while he only got hotter somehow. You wondered if Samantha said something to him but you decided to not bring her up.

"Once i recover I want you to train me back to shape"

He smiled as you said that and crawled into the bed to get on top of you, you could smell the cologne mixed with the aroma of freshly burnt cigarette on him.

"In shape you silly girl? You're all perfect but I'll help you get healthy if that's what you desire" he grabbed your chin and talked to you as if you were a petulant child.

"Yeahh ..that .."

"What do you want for dinner?"

"You"

"You had me ..no more exertion..what else?"

There was a smile on his face and it made you smile even wider.

"You seem..in a good mood"

"Yeah you put me there with your little stunt this afternoon" you couldn't help but giggle at his words but then your expressions turned somber.

"I'm bored Daemon..I'm losing my mind over here"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"You're doing enough for me..I can't ask you to be here with me 24/7" he sighed before he got off the bed and quickly walked towards the closet to put his shirt on again.

"Let's go"

"What?"

"Come on …I want to show you something "

He picked you up as carefully as he could and made you sit down on the couch as he went back in the room to grab the car keys, then he picked you up again and took you downstairs.

"Where are we going?"

"Shhhh.."

You got quiet as he gave you the eyes, he really wanted to wait for your birthday but he figured this would brighten your mood. Halfway on the road he made you close your eyes and when you opened it you were right in front of the diner. From outside it looked different, he was getting the exteriors changed now that he owned it but that was not what took you by surprise, you gasped as you looked at the new name of the diner. It was no longer Cuisine waves.

"Silly's Cheeseburger" you read the name out loud so he looked at the diner,

"It's so fucking stupid I know..I just wanted you to have a place where you'd feel at home even when you're at work and perhaps think of me every time you see the name"

He chuckled as he looked your way and he was expecting you to laugh or give him eyes or something but he saw you sniffing and crying instead, those were the tears of happiness for a change. He immediately took his seat belt off and scooted closer to comfort you,

"Sentimental little thing aren't you?"

"Shut up ..this is ..the sweetest thing..i ..oh god"

"Hey hey hey okay no crying..no more yeah?" He cooed in your ears as he embraced you as tightly as he could without hurting you. Once you had calmed down a bit he stepped out and opened the door on your side to pick you up so he could take you inside, it was all empty in there due to the renovation. The diner was going through a complete transformation.

"Wait where are ..what about the other staff?"

"Don't worry, they're all off with pay..it will reopen a week later..on your birthday" you gasped again as he revealed that.

"Gosh Daemon i love this..i love you …but is this really the best use of your money? I don't want you to regret it in future"

He smiled as you said that and made you sit down on the bill counter, cupping your cheeks he made you look at him,

"This is not just a financial investment, this place is the reason why you were there in the alley that night, the reason why I met you..why I am no longer just living but alive. I'd never ever regret anything that involves you my love, now I'd shut up because you're going to cry again and I don't like little girls who cry all the time "

You bit on your cheeks as he said that and pulled him closer to kiss him as lovingly as you could.

"You know we are not far apart in age right?"

He chuckled as you said that.

"I'm jesting darling, you can cry all you want but –"

"You hate it I know" he nodded in affirmation.

"Want to see your favorite place?"

"Do you even have to ask?"

You giggled as he picked you up again and took you to the kitchen, it was newly furnished as well, you didn't even recognise it at first.

"New burners oh my gosh, we have been complaining for so long..wait a minute– " a look of realization flashed on your face so he raised his brows .

"Does that mean you're my boss now?"

"Technically yeah..don't look so shocked though ..you know I'm your boss any which ways"

"Haha funny..do you think people will hate me for fucking the boss?" He grimaced as you said that,

"You're so crude and no.. I think they'd suck up to you instead"

"I don't want that either"

"Are you happy?"

"I'm more than happy right now dae, you have no idea how amazing you are"

Only if you knew what he was capable of he thought.

While he was grabbing dinner you were in the car by yourself and something felt off but you couldn't put your finger on it, you had the same sinking feeling in your chest now but you didn't understand why. However as soon as you were back in your apartment suddenly it dawned on you.

You looked at him as he was taking the food out, contemplating whether to ask him the question or not. He seemed happy and relaxed for once and you didn't want to ruin that but then you didn't understand why he was lying to you.

There was nothing in the backseat of his car, none of his belongings, he went to his condo to bring his stuff but he came back empty handed and he told you that his things were in the backseat of his car but you had just been there and it was empty so why did he lie to you?

Where did he go? Was he still seeing Samantha or was he in some sort of trouble with her? Millions of questions bothered you and you knew you had to figure out the truth sooner than later.

☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️

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@simbaaas-stuff @ajthefujoshi @witchybitch2 @hypocritic-trash-baby @mariaelizabeth21-blog1 @thefallenangel21n @kmc1989

@stupidthoughtsinwriting

#daemon targaryen x reader #daemon targaryen x female reader #daemon targaryen x reader angst #daemon targaryen x reader fluff #daemon targaryen x reader smut #non canon #modern au #read the warnings

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misc-obeyme · 2 months

Note

what are your thoughts on the cheeky lil cow boy (belphie)

Ah yes, Belphegor, a bit of a polarizing character in general, I think. People seem to either really love him or really hate him.

Generally speaking, I think he's deceptively cunning, but not in a malicious way. He's pretty chill most of the time, but he'll do stuff like manipulate his brothers to get them to do his chores for him. Except for Beel, of course. And really they are a unit. Belphie is always ready to fight for Beel and vice versa. But I also really like how they just quietly support each other. Someone will say oh Belphie fell asleep in this weird place and Beel will immediately be like I'll go get him. Or Belphie will be like we need to make sure we bring food to this thing because Beel will get hungry. Like they're just always thinking about each other and I think that's really sweet.

Belphie will also call people out if he wants to. If he has no reason to keep it to himself, he'll straight up tell you if he thinks you're doing something questionable. And his issues with Diavolo indicate to me that he has a problem with authority, like he would be more defiant if he wasn't also lazy lol.

Inevitably, though, we can't really talk about Belphie without discussing the Lesson 16 Incident. At this point, I think most people are aware of those events, but just in case, I'll put the rest of this under a read more. And also it's kinda lengthy, so be forewarned lol.

First of all, I have to say that I was honestly so confused about what was happening in Lesson 16 that I didn't fully understand that Belphie had killed MC. I had to read it multiple times and then read what other people were saying about it. So I never had an intense reaction to it.

But to be fair, it wasn't like we didn't know there was something weird going on the whole time. I knew it was the youngest brother locked up there and it seemed like it was wrong, so that made Lucifer out to be the bad guy of the situation. Then it turns out that wasn't the case at all.

Belphie is manipulative. That's just part of his character. And when he has something that he's trying to do, he's going to use that skill to get it.

Some people are still mad at Lucifer for locking Belphie up at all. Some people are obviously quite upset that Belphie killed MC.

But here's what I think.

It isn't that black and white. Aside from the confusing time travel shenanigans, this event is one of the most realistic things that has ever happened in the story.

Belphie shared Lilith's love of humans. Together they wanted to learn more about the human world. It would be easy for him to blame himself for her interest and what ultimately led to her death. But even if he didn't, he saw the way that it tore his entire family apart.

It wasn't just that his dad got mad at his sister and they had an argument or something.

It was that his dad was going to end his sister's existence and in defiance, his older brother rebelled. And there was a war. This was not some squabble. This was siblings fighting siblings.

Belphie watched his brothers and sisters fight and hurt and kill each other and it all came back to Lilith falling in love with a human.

And then he fell with his brothers, cast out of his home, losing everything he's ever known. His brothers are changing and suffering just like he is.

They don't talk about it. They clearly all keep secrets regarding it still, things that don't come out until MC comes along. Which is supposedly thousands of years after the fact (at least in OG). That means Belphie has had all that time to let that trauma fester. To let it twist inside him. To let it morph into the one thought that became most dominant: that humans are bad.

Is that a fair assessment of what happened? No, of course not. But we're dealing with a war traumatized fallen angel that clearly hasn't worked through any of these feelings in thousands of years.

And then he defies Diavolo and Lucifer panics.

Yes, Lucifer should have found a better way of handling it. But remember what happened to him when he defied authority? He is trying his best to protect Belphie. He is trying not to lose another sibling. He is also still traumatized and therefore overreacting out of fear.

And so was Belphie.

Imagine being locked up like that and a human comes along. A human is free among your brothers to do whatever terrible things humans do while you're powerless to stop them. Of course he's going to try to manipulate that human into setting him free. Of course he's then going to eliminate them because humans have been historically bad for his family.

I read this situation as Belphie being both afraid and angry that a human - the thing he's convinced himself was the main cause of his sister's death - has become so close to his brothers and has the access to his family that could cause another rift among them.

You could say that it was Belphie's idea to get MC to have all the pacts, but that isn't really true, either. By the time MC meets Belphie, they already have a pact with two of his brothers. He sees them already starting to worm their way into his family. And he knows that the only way to get out of the attic is to encourage it. He doesn't really have a choice.

Maybe everyone can now call me a Belphie apologist. But I'm always coming at this from an outside fictional standpoint. I'm like listen he's a flawed character and it's actually pretty realistic of him to react this way considering the circumstances.

However, he did kill MC. And that's why my own MC, Ciaran, has issues with Belphie for a while. It's also traumatic to have someone kill you, so it isn't like I'm saying MC should just forget about it or forgive Belphie immediately. I think it probably should have taken a lot more time for MC to trust Belphie again. Certainly that part of the story was a bit rushed.

But they're dealing with lesson format constraints and also it's a silly otome game so I guess fully formed character arcs can't be expected. Especially since we aren't dealing with routes and they have to cram everybody into the same set of lessons.

In the end, I think Belphie is an interesting and complex character. I think there's a lot of space to explore more about this particular aspect of him, but due to the format of the media and the lack of routes, his more in depth character arc just doesn't exist.

I personally have no problem with Belphie as a character, but I also understand why people don't like him. I am always of the opinion that everyone is free to love or hate or have any emotions at all about fictional characters lol. This is just my personal opinion.

#sorry I didn't mean to get into Belphie character analysis #but it all just kinda came out and once I started I couldn't stop #I don't normally write essays like this about characters that aren't Barbatos lol #though I could probably write essays about all of them if I wanted to #obey me #obey me belphegor #obey me belphie #om belphegor #om belphie #anon asks #misc answers

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lillithhearts · 5 months

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Can I request dating headcanons for Gale, Wyll, Dammon, Rolan, Zevlor, Halsin, and Astarion with gn s/o?

say less!! It's been awhile since I've written headcanons or prompts with multiple people but LETS TRY

Bg3 chars x gn!Tav

warnings: (maybe) Ooc Zevlor,Rolan (I think I have a pretty good grasp on Dammon) not proofread!! Mentions of traumatic backstories

Zevlor definitely has some self worth issues due to Fall of Elturel and what happened with the Grove he cares deeply for his fellow kin and that care flows into you aswell. He is absolutely infatuated with you and has absolutely no shame showing it or others.

I feel like he's very big on PDA for an odd reason he isn't afraid to tell anyone off and he has a backbone that's for sure, that doesn't mean he's not vulnerable he absolutely is and he feels safest with you as his beloved. He shows his love with physical affection and acts of service in my opinion— cooks you breakfast,lunch and dinner. Plans nice evenings, takes you nice places, whole nine yards— he's also surprisingly big on literature and he writes you poems and tells you the nicest most sweetest things ever. He's a very stubborn man though, so if you're also stubborn it can turn into bickering but never an argument, at the end of the day he just wants to see you smile.

EXTREMELY cocky, He's like a cat that'll keep eye contact with you when knocking a class off the counter. He does love big nonetheless! A heart of gold and an ego of steel but you love that about him

I think he'd enjoy quality time. Cooking or cleaning together, reading in silence or just holding each other in the morning juicing up for the day.

I also think he's also just absolutely obsessed with his Partner but in a more discreet way, Glances at you after he voices an opinion or telling a joke. Seeing what you'll do and think. Expanding on that he definitely takes what you think to heart at all times and always ask your opinion on anything— food,clothes, decoration how to style his hair so on and so forth

Also a HUGE cuddle bug. Cooking dinner? Hugs you from behind, Sitting on the sofa reading a book? Lays his head in your lap and looks at your gorgeous face, Walking in public? Hand on your lower back.

He's a little cutie patootie

OUR FAVORITE BLACKSMITH!!

He's actually so adorable and hes definitely into gift giving and physical touch.

He'll make you little trinkets and do-dads from scraps he has left over, You know those metal roses some people make for their partners?? He does that with you and they look absolutely amazing everytime (he buys you normal flowers aswell do not worry)

He's also no stranger to being the small spoon so just hold him sometimes, He's gone through some things with the Grove and the Shadow lands and he has nightmares on occasion when he will wake you up and you of course sit with him until he can rest easy again

He's no surprise to anyone very strong he's a black smith for crying out loud, he's 90% sure he can pick you effortlessly no matter how tall or big you are he will do it. No negotiating about that

He has the cutest puppy dog eyes I mean can you blame him? I'd use those gorgeous eyes to my advantage aswell— he knows you love it and him so whenever he wants something from you he gives you a look anyone could coo at you fall for it everytime

In the city (or in general) he basically drags you around by your hand, he's also 10 steps ahead of you mentally and sometimes physically..at this point get a leash for him

He's still very emotionally intelligent and talking with him about something that bothers you is met with understandment and reassurance while he works on the issue and he expects it vice versa aswell where you happily oblige

He's sweet but he's not a pushover under any circumstances

The most gentlemen-y of Gentlemen.

Outside of Baldurs gate he will do his best to spoil you with food, flowers and protection— you swear to him you can take care of yourself but he doesn't listen to you

After you enter Baldurs gate however he's going full ex-Noble mode, Fancy dinners, Bouquets and whatever you'd like he's ready to get it for you at the basic snap of your fingers.

Gift giving is his love language, ontop of quality time. You tell him you do not need all of the nice things he gives you but he insists some Noble roots run deep, he often confides in you over his Father and Mizora and the guilt of what he would've potentially done to Karlach still lies in his head despite Karlachs constant reassurance ontop of your own

His favorite thing is honestly to look at you especially your eyes, The glimmer in them after a fight? Or the reflection of the fire from the campfire in your eyes? Absolutely breathtaking in his eyes.

To him you are everything, You're one of the only people he has left and he isn't planning on losing you, has your back if you ever need it. Physical cover in a fight? He's right behind you, someone's giving you shit? He'll defend you with every ounce of his being

Also a man that insists on carrying you anytime you even show an ounce of exhaustion, He might also be one hill away from collapsing but he's your knight in shining armor and you know it

Sometimes he wonders if you love Tara more than him honestly—

Please give this man some REAL love, pamper him, smother him and reassure him. The roots on Mystras abuse runs DEEP but he doesn't know that but you do.

Despite his very obvious love for you and the care he holds deep in his heart but he cannot help but feel like he's holding you back with the literal ticking bomb he is, everyday he fears it might be his last along with yours unfortunately. He's aware you'd insist on staying with him if his time ever came but he simply can't bring himself to think of you being gone even after he's passed

If you're out alone he asks Tara to keep an eye on you if you're out long that is

He's not insecure but afraid, anxious despite the fact he's one of the men with the least baggage he's worried you think you can do better

his biggest love language I think is physical touch, He wants to feel you, to know you're real and you're his.

If you're useless in the kitchen he does not mind doing all of the cooking and baking as neither do you. He's a powerful and talented culinary wizard, He also just prefers to spend his nights and mornings in your arms just taking a breather and loving you

Our most beloved spawn :)

Obviously very touchy and handsy but hes also big on words of affirmation and gift giving

He once brought you a head rat as a joke saying it was a gift

He needs someone to match his energy, either by being matching chaotic or laughing at his not so violent antics (or also at his violent antics that's up to you honestly)

He's not all sunshine and rainbows however, the wounds of Cazador will always be part of him and he wants you to know that.

He talks big but he knows he's alot with everything he's gone through and what that made him at the end of everything

He also knows you won't be around forever unlike him and he dreads the day he's alone again

You are his sunshine and he doesn't know where he'd go or who he'd be if you didn't stick with him and he loves you endlessly for your patience and understanding with him.

Halsin the big bear

Have a fear of bears or dont like em in general?

Ultimate deal breaker, he needs someone to love him for all of him, bear form included

He's a big sweetheart but like Dammon also not gullible or Naive

Definitely big on Marriage with you because he genuinely thinks you are the one and he wishes to never spend a day without you ever again

He becomes less subtle with his advances and flirting the more you date him, and it makes him laugh everytime you give him a knowing look and laugh at him

No matter how not pick up-able you think you are Halsin will throw you over his shoulder

HUGE cuddler anytime you guys aren't actively moving around? BOOM hands on you everywhere. Another man who loves giving loving words

A nightmare? He will whisper sweet nothings into your ear and hold you closely to his chest listening to his steady heart beat

He's also a great cook which he uses to make you some very nice meals

I can also imagine you can ride him in his bear form especially if you're tiny, Cuddling him in his bear form is also not rare between you both

Overall very big nice bear husband

OMG KILL ME I ACCIDENTALLY PUBLISHED THIS BEFORE I WAS DONE THATS SO EMBARRASSING

again I apologize for ooc npcs 😭 hope you enjoyed nonetheless

#bg3 x reader #bg3 gale #bg3 astarion #bg3 spoilers #bg3 tav #bg3 wyll #bg3 zevlor #bg3 dammon #bg3 halsin #bg3

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lizard-queen-izzy · 3 months

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OK! WE'RE DOING THIS!

Everyone shut up and sit down. I'm talking about TMA. I am listening through for the first time, I'm through S1 and halfway through S2, and I already have many Thoughts. Today, we will be focusing on my evil ship thoughts, because I missed my chance when this was coming out so now I will subject you all.

I know Jon and Martin get together at some point, and yknow, that's all fine and good.

BUT I WANNA TALK ABOUT JON AND TIM, OK?

There is so much potential for something there, and they would be so incredibly messy after the S1 finale.

[I've lightly scrolled through the jontim tag, and I truly don't think there's enough of you talking about how tragic they are. Platonic or romantic, they're so so sad.]

They both worked in the research department before Jon was made Head Archivist, and even though they definitely weren't close, they were definitely friendly. My Firm Belief is that Jon was the only one who took Tim seriously despite his more lax attitude, he saw his strong work ethic and his dedication and treated him accordingly. And Tim was the only one who listened to Jon, the only one who thought he had anything to add and took his suggestions.

I believe they were hired around the same time, and once they met there was a silent understanding that they were there for eachother. It was nice to just have someone in their corner in this new environment.

When Jon got promoted to Head Archivist, he was adamant about Tim being on his team, because he knew Tim would help get the results needed. [I have a whole, how everyone got assigned to the team timeline thought out but that's not why we're here]

Tim is the only member of his team who Jon doesn't think would have written Antonio Blake's statement as a joke to scare him. Which means he trusts him the most out of all of them. Which wouldn't be as important if he showed distaste for them equally, but he regards both Tim and Sasha highly, and only really seems to have an issue with Martin at this point. So why would he trust Tim to not have written it but not Sasha? Unless he's known him the longest and has reason to put that faith in him.

AND THEIR CONVERSATION AT THE BEGINNING OF MAG 33?? You're gonna listen to that, the first time we as the audience meet Tim, and tell me you don't hear how much these two care for eachother? Even when Jon starts getting upset/loud, he calms quickly for Tim, and doesn't let himself fully yell at him. He also leaves it up to Tim to fix the mistakes, an example of him trusting Tim's judgement and work. And Tim is so calm with him! The man keeps getting worked up and starting to get loud, but Tim stays calm and let's him self correct and say what he needs to before proceeding himself. He knows Jon is stressed and has a lot on his plate. He knows these mistakes needed to be discussed with him and corrected somehow, but he's still not going to force Jon to re-record the statements if he really doesn't want to, he's willing to find another solution. And then he leaves to go work on it so Jon can get back to recording the statement.

And Tim telling Jon he doesn't understand the filing system and Jon explaining it calmly to him, admitting he doesn't really get it either but that's how it is.

You also have to see my vision for how the S1 finale effects them. A traumatic experience where they were both scarred mentally and physically in the same ways. Something that should have brought them even closer, maybe finally made them feel comfortable being proper friends outside of work. But they both react to it SO differently. And that is the beginning of their downfall. That is the beginning of the end.

Because Jon spirals. He stops trusting everyone. He pushes them all away and starts crossing boundaries. HE SPIES ON TIMS HOUSE. And he can't even calm down long enough to see why this bothers his coworkers. Why this hurts Tim.

The beginning of S2 from Tim's perspective is awful. Your first friend in this workplace is overworking himself, throwing himself back into work the second he's cleared physically well enough to go back. But he clearly hasn't moved past it, and you can't blame him for that. Everyone copes differently, but then he turns on you. He stops trusting you, starts pushing you away, starts spying on you. Can you imagine how much that hurts? To have the first person in this terrifying new job who ever put their trust in you, who ever believed in you, to turn on you just when you need them the most.

THEY ARE SO FUCKING MESSY. GOD.

Anyway. I very well may be back with more JonTim thoughts as I continue to listen. But this is what I have for you today.

#tma #tma spoilers #tma season one #tma season 2 #jonathan sims #jon sims #tim stoker #timothy stoker #the magnus archives #archives gang #character thoughts #jontim #jonsims/timstoker #ramblings #Thoughts

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imagine-shenanigans · 1 year

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I'm getting back into the swing of things for writing, so here's some random safe for work headcanons because I've been reading an obscene amount of x reader content (Please go check out Aggre(g/v)ation by llama goddess, and Saving Three Ex-cell-ent skeletons by recklessly caffeinated on ao3 because I got brain worms babey.)

Also since its been awhile since I've written something on this blog, remember that these are stream of consciousness teehee <3

(General tws: references (but not explicitly said) to past consumption of humans, ED/Disordered eating and mental health issues, au-typical violence references, etc)

Word Count: 2.2k words ish

Horrortale!Sans (Skull) x Reader Misc SFW Headcanons

My favorite thing is when people portray sans in any light as either Just A Little Guy or as Fuckin Huge and Skull is a Big Boy <333 he's easily 7 feet tall, and Built Fucking Different.

Monsters can't like, completely and utterly alter the type of monster they are, so you won't see a Bunny Monster turn into a Moldsmal but its very widely understood that magic reflects the soul reflects the mind reflects the body - so its not really something where monsters experience dysphoria as much? Like if a monster is afab, but realizes they're trans and a guy, it may take awhile to transition - and they may need some help via magic other than their own - but it's really normal in comparison.

Unfortunately, the positive aspects of the whole "mind/soul/body" equation in that you'll eventually look how you want so long as you put the effort into changing every day can also be blocked by trauma and "scarring" to the soul. It's pretty rare in the canon universe, but for Horrortale monsters its damn near exclusive - when you have to do anything you can to survive, adaptation to your environment makes you a hell of a lot scarier in compenstation.

Skull is one such monster where if it weren't for his injury, he'd be a complete 180 from the typical monsters you see. But because of it, it makes it harder to control his magic because he can't think straight. It takes him longer to form sentences, takes him longer to process words sometimes, or even read. He gets light sensitivity really bad, and because his body change wasn't by his choice, but by an unfortunate way of being injured while in a traumatic situation, Skull, no matter how much better he gets, will never fully go back to what he was before.

He's extremely self-conscious about his size and his looks, not to mention his mental capacity. He knows and can think about what he's doing, his mind has never lost that sharpness or intellect. He can strip a machine down to parts and put it back together or put it to other use in minutes, but if you ask him to write it down or explain it he's going to have one hell of a time and he'll probably leave the experience worse than he went into it.

Similarly, if he does want to talk, in one of his rare moods where he's explaining what he's doing out loud to you, he could go on for hours, but suddenly hit a block where the words don't work right.

Be patient with him when this happens. He doesn't like it, and even though it can be frustrating at times, like if you're trying to decide something for dinner or write up a grocery list, he really is doing his best.

Sign language is a good alternative when the words don't want to come out but he's still able to communicate - writing can be one sided, but sometimes thats all he can do too.

When an idea strikes the both of you one day to just draw what he's thinking, Skull could fucking kiss you senseless when you hand him a white board and a dry erase marker. Words may not be making sense in his brain but he can picture what he wants in those moments so this is the perfect compromise between the two for communication.

Skull is his name now, so even though he was once Sans, Skull is what he picked as the reclamation of all that's happened to him. A name that he picked to get him through it day by day but its also a reminder of where he's been and where he'll go. That said... it's also a name he initially picked as a form of self harm to some degree, a mocking reference to his own injury that hindered him.

So while he'll probably never change his name again... he appreciates it when you call him pet names. It's a reminder that you love him enough to do so, while also giving himself a break from the constant reminder. He particularly loves when you call him your "Big old teddy bear" because... god he does not feel like it sometimes.

Get it its a reference to some of the fandom calling him Bear and I love that name for him a lot too

Due to the past, he has some Big Issues With Food, constantly bouncing back and forth between feast and famine.

He has some issues with meat at times - on bad days certain textures and tastes just remind him of the bad times in his life where survival was such a tightrope walk that just imagining eating it makes him sick.

A very "safe food" house, where the two of you stock up on your safe foods and have a cupboard dedicated to it for days you can't stand anything else.

Some days, Skull is content for the two of you to eat at the kitchen table or to watch TV in the living room while you two eat from separate bowls/plates, and he can eat fairly freely, not particularly caring who eats how much or in what order.

Others... other days he anxiously watches to make sure you've had a serving before he gets his, or, more likely, he brings the full pan/a single platter to the table, and the two of you share the same food, taking bites in turn so he can make sure you're getting enough to eat.

King of cooking. It makes him feel better to have full say of what goes into the meals, and honestly the man is an excellent cook. If you insist on helping him cook, it's a 50/50 on whether he gives you this smug little smile and sets you up on the counter top so he can look at you while he cooks, or if he actually lets you help.

He feels out of control if he can't cook, so even on special occasions he's still going to be cooking himself, unless you feel the Urge To Cook or you two order out.

Even then, please just go over with him what you did step by step and tell him what fully went in it - he trusts you implicitly and he's unlikely to outright ask... but it always helps ease his mind when you walk him through what you did just so he can feel less guilty.

Cuddler.

Big fucking cuddler.

Sitting on the couch alone? Not for long. Skull appears? Bam. you're in his lap, his claws smoothing across your skin and through your hair, purring up a storm as he settles his chin on the top of your head and closes his eyes.

If you're watching TV, he's only ever going to pay half attention if he's got you in his lap, half-snoozing in a very light doze as he basks in your presence, and half listening for danger/to the TV depending on the day.

He ADORES when you read to him. He loves it when you talk, and when he gets to listen to storytime while you talk? Best. Day. Ever.

Loves how small you are in comparison to him - something he never thought he'd be comfortable with at first, just based on the idea alone, but in practice he loves being completely wrapped around you and making sure you're safe. You're his personal teddy bear, no matter how many times you call him that yourself.

Jetpacking/Him being the little spoon is... unlikely. He's got some damn broad shoulders and chest, and he's not super happy with the idea of your limbs inside of him no matter if its on purpose or not.

If you want to hold him, he's definitely okay with that (although he does prefer to hold you) as long as you're touching him. You'll just have to let him set his head in your lap, or rest against your chest as he snuggles you chest to... well not chest, so more chest-to-skull and chest-to-legs with how he holds you. He's very beefy and has presence but he's about half the weight most people expect, despite the fact that it should be obvious because he's a skeleton.

He lets out the most broken whimper-whine-purr when you gently kiss the cracks on his skull, close to the gaping wound there. Don't actually touch inside or press too close to the wound itself, because that's genuinely very uncomfortable in the way it would be if he were human and had a missing eye and you touched the inside of the socket to see what it felt like. Just overall a bad experience so Don't Do That No Matter What The Intrusive Thoughts Say, although he'd let you do it in a heartbeat if you asked him

Absolutely whipped. Skull will do anything and everything you say if you just look at him just like that - just like he's your everything, like you love him without bounds and without exception. Puppy eyes also work.

He's a goddamn simp is what he is,

You'll just be minding your own business and you'll look over and catch him staring at you like you've hung the moon and the stars just to provide him with a small amount of your light during the nighttime. He looks at you with such adoration that it hurts.

Sometimes it looks a little freaky like, before you've come to automatically understand his expressions but goddamnit its so hard not to fall in love with him even just by a little more when he loves you so fucking much.

Kissies? Kissies for Skull? Please?

man FIENDS for kissies.

Once he's more comfortable giving affection unprompted you can barely keep his fucking hands off of you. He goes from "I Can And Will Nuzzle You And Pull You Into My Lap But That's It" to "No Kissies? No Snuggles? No Love For Skull? Oh! Jail! Jail For Datemate! Jail For Datemate For One Thousand Years!"

He straight up just hangs off of your clothing while staring at you until you give him a kiss or a hug. He'll come up to you and just bury his face into your neck while purring, or nuzzle your hair, but then moments later pout at you while wrapping his arms around your middle and burying his face into your stomach until you give up whatever youre doing and pay attention to him.

He doesn't do it often But By God Does He Get His Way When He Does.

He's also the type to just like, spend the entire day giving you small pecks on the lips and cheeks and forehead, and then snuggle you at night, and then the next day he'll be way less clingy. You take it in stride and then he just out of the blue dips you in the fucking moonlight and kisses you senseless.

The bastard.

Circling back to pet names, he thinks the nickname Teddybear/Bear is cute and he likes it, but call him My Love/Love/Dear Heart/something else dripping with affection and he's cupping your face in his hands and staring at you adoringly while he rubs your cheek with his claw.

Surprise him with new ones and he'll turn positively blue in the face while smiling like a fool

Surprise him with silly ones and he'll be even more in love while laughing. call him your little chicken nugget and he cant stop smiling and chuckling for a few hours. God. He'll dream of kissing you under the moonlight if you make a pun out of it.

(Brief aside here so I can avoid the text character limit "per block" but I prefer doing bullet point lists for these so anyway continue on)

Pet names always depend on the person, so whatever his one for you depends on you as a person (thats the easy way out for me) but he prefers just one pet name. (Aside from like. Babe being thrown in sometimes yknow)

He'll start with one pet name and see how you react to it - he prefers cute ones like Kitten, Bunny, Lovebird, etc. Something small and cute and adorable - though he changes it up depending on what you respond best to, because while the majority of the reason he calls you a pet name is out of affection, he still calls you pet names to see you get flustered.

On days he's feeling better, he gets more sassy he's gonna include more puns. Or teasing. Example - if he calls you lovebird, or some sort of bird-based nickname? Fuckin. He's calling you pigeon to see how you react.

Bunny? Hare-brain

Kitten? Fuzzball

If its an animal/bird/etc that he calls you in terms of nicknames, he might even refer to you as the scientific name of the animal, or a breed in that category because he thinks its funny to watch you fully stop in your tracks and process what he's just said.

Picks you up at any given opportunity.

Puddle? Oh dear, he should make sure your shoes don't get wet. Better princess carry you.

About to miss an appointment? Thrown over a shoulder.

Just feels like it? Get Scooped Idiot. Okay i have Way More Thoughts but I'm already at 2k because I have no impulse control so byeeeee come request more xreader stuff from me

#sans undertale #undertale #sans horrortale #horrortale #undertale au #sans x reader #horrortale sans x reader #strawberry writing #strawberry headcanons #i also Have Big Big Plans i cant share with a series of fics #but i'm still writing those and i know myself #if i actively talk about them i may not write them #so once the first one is done i'll update it #but yeah anyway sans renaissance time thank you for feeding me fandom this is what i give back

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