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team-science-mega-nerds · 5 years

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Fictober Prompt #20: “You could talk about it, you know?”

Fandom: Supergirl:

Pairing: AgentCorp (Alex x Lena)

Warnings: None

When Alex gets the call, she starts packing immediately. She calls Kara on the way to the airport and texts Eliza, but no matter what they say, she’s going. Research is something that Alex can do mindlessly. It requires focus, yes, but when she’s in the zone, nothing else matters. Alex also likes trying new things. Her ex had called her adventurous in the bedroom but old reliable in real life and Alex hated her so much for it, that she took a contract position in Metropolis for six months. Alex was tired of being that person. Predictable. She wanted something more.

And then, there’s what happened four months ago. But that? Alex never talks about.

These days, Alex goes with the flow and if that means being one of seventy-five researchers boarding a ship from Norway and embarking on a year-long arctic expedition, then so be it. She knows the training itself will be difficult. This isn’t just about research, it’s about mental and physical stability and Alex has to dig deep to remain consistent and convince everyone that she’s prepared.

When they actually embark, Alex has a backpack filled with letters written from Kara. Most of them are supportive, plenty are questioning, but Alex’s replies have always been good. Positive. She’s ready. She can’t deal with real-life right now.

The actual expedition begins with a bang. Champagne in the main cafeteria and some kind of stew that looks like it would weigh Alex down. Alex lingers around a few other researchers, who she’d call friends at this point, and pokes around at some bread. “I’m more of a whiskey girl myself,” Someone says a few tables over. Alex pokes her head up, recognizing the voice almost immediately. Lena Luthor. A brilliant mind, a no-bullshit attitude, Alex had been warned at least a dozen times to stay away from her. She bought herself onto this ship, Derek had muttered to Alex when they’d received their wetsuits and gear.

Alex was used to men undermining her, so she took his words with a grain of salt, but she had to wonder. Almost everyone had made their research intentions clear by now, but Lena was still a mystery. Alex discards her plate and approaches Lena. Alex unzips her jacket and flashes the flask she has in her double-layered jacket. “Wanna take a walk?”

“Absolutely,” Lena says, eagerly following Alex.

A walk was maybe pushing it, but avoiding the congestion of the mess hall, Lena and Alex find an empty lab with a small lounge area. Lena sits on the couch first but Alex holds out her hand. “I’m Alex.”

“Yeah, I know and I suspect you know who I am.” Lena grabs the flask out of Alex’s pocket without hesitation. “Saw you on the range, pretty impressive.”

“Army.”

“I figured.” Alex didn’t know that anyone had been paying attention to her, let alone someone as well known as Lena. Alex believes that Lena’s intentions must be something greater. This isn’t just about publicity. The amount of training involved alone would make most people quit on day one. Lena had struggled with some of the tactical elements. She was terrible with her shotgun and not very good at getting into her harness during their helicopter drills. But Lena was persistent and Alex could see it in her eyes, even as they traded a flask filled with whiskey back and forth. “You’re studying polar bear movement and health?”

“Yep.” Alex kicks back and sinks into the couch. “You must be on the small scale climate change team.”

“Team?”

“You guys are like the cool kids. We’re the dweebs,” Alex smiles. “You’re doing the 2-1-2 rotation?”

“Yeah, you too, right?” Alex nods. “We’ll be seeing a lot of each other.” Alex doesn’t know if that’s a good or a bad thing but she decides that she won’t ignore this friendship in favor of isolating herself.

In her first week on the ship, Alex manages to finally come up with a proper thesis. She’s prepared to write a paper on this when the mission is over but she’s a bit rusty. Alex treks on, learning everything she can from her fellow researchers, while they’re still in the lull before things start picking up. While Alex is just wrapping up her Skype session with Kara, she hears frustrated muttering from the room across the hall. Lena’s room to be exact.

“Luthor, you need help?” Alex yells.

“Fucking shit!” Lena grumbles. “Yeah, can you come here for a sec?” Alex blows a kiss to Kara before signing out and heading over to Lena’s room. This is only the third time Alex has been in here but it’s just as clean as it was on that very first day. Lena is sitting on the ground with a mess of wires and her computer next to her. “This system is from like the 80s.”

“You’re not so smart after all,” Alex jokes as she shoos Lena aside and gets to work setting up the equipment. Lena lounges on her bed and watches Alex.

“So, that was your sister, right?”

“Hm?”

“That you were just talking to.” Alex glances up for a second. Usually, Lena is very casual but something about this conversation seems to be leading somewhere different.

“Yeah. Kara.”

“Because I wondered…” Alex’s heart starts to race. Alex can’t meet Lena’s eyes. She doesn’t want anyone wondering anything about her. She took this journey to get away from hard questions not to run right into them. “About the ring.”

“What ring?”

“The one that’s missing from your finger.” Alex looks down at her hand and the tan line that’s sitting vacant on her ring finger. “Anyway...I’ll stop being observant if you want me to.”

“Please. It’s not something I really want to get into.” Lena respects her wishes. They continue their nightly drinking sessions which turn into rowdy card games and once - only once - Alex looks into Lena’s eyes for longer than necessary. It’s all fine. Alex calls Kara that night and she sits in her locked room, cuddling a pillow and listening to Kara talk endlessly about her day.

“Are you okay?”

“Sure,” Alex mutters.

“I would get on a plane and find you if you needed it.”

“You can’t. Literally, it’d be impossible.”

“Sisters do impossible things all the time.” Kara smiles. “You’re out there trying to save the world, aren’t you?” Kara’s video feed keeps freezing and it drives Alex crazy. So crazy that she kicks a hole through the screen. She didn’t know that being around this many people would feel like loneliness. The same feeling that she’d been trying to drown out for four months slowly began to creep up on her.

All this and her stupid pride nearly get her killed the next day. As she’s laying there with her life flashing before her eyes, she considers how fitting it is that she will probably freeze to death out there. Alex is saved because she always is. The med bay is frenzied, everyone checking in on her and no one acknowledging the fact that Alex had been reckless. It takes a while for Alex to regain feeling in her body and then, suddenly, all the emotions come flooding in. Lena picks that exact moment to come into the room. “Was that a fucking cry for help or something?” Alex notices that Lena’s eyes are red like she’d been crying.

“Fuck off-.”

“You were reckless out there. You need to do better.”

“Thanks. That’s helpful.”

“What do you want me to say?” Lena asks as she shrugs out of her jacket and practically throws it into a chair. “You know you’re brooding might be cool where you’re from but if it’s going to put you in danger like that, then you seriously need to talk to someone.”

“It was a mistake.”

“You can’t make mistakes like that not when people care-.” Lena closes her eyes. “The polar bears need you.” Alex breaks into a fit of laughter that quickly morphs into something unexplainable. Tears. Lena holds her through it all which makes Alex feel different.

Renewed.

After Alex has pushed around her dinner and listened to Lena explain everything she’s read in their daily news debrief, things between them get very quiet. Alex expects a question because Lena is the kind of person who needs to know everything. Instead, Lena offers Alex a middle ground. “I’m going to ask you something now.” Lena props her head up with her elbows pressed against Alex’s hospital bed. “Are you married?”

“No.”

“Divorced?”

“No.” Lena looks confused so Alex adds, “I was though. Married, I mean.”

“You could talk about it, you know?” Lena motions to the empty room. “It’s just us. All the secrets travel out in that ice-cold tundra and...they disappear.”

“She’d dead, Lena.” Alex sits up and wonders why it feels okay to finally talk about her. “She died four months before we started training. Which, everyone told me...screamed and yelled at me, don’t go out there, you’re just upset. ‘Just upset’”.” Alex scoffs. “If they understood the fucking insanity of life without...her.” For once, Alex isn’t coddled, she’s allowed to feel everything. It doesn’t come as a surprise that Lena is the one who lets her. “If I didn’t do this if I didn’t take this risk...I couldn’t have made it back home. Too many reminders.”

“Grief is a nuisance,” Lena remarks. “If only it was all good times on the HMS Discovery.” There’s something that signals clarity in Lena’s voice. Alex doesn’t feel talked down to but understood. It’s taken her a while to find someone who understands the impermanence of life. It makes sense if Alex takes a step back and thinks about it. Lena studies climate change. They're both constantly thinking about how the world is folding in on itself more and more every day. This idea and this moment become the cornerstone of their friendship.

Four months and two stops into the expedition and Alex and Lena find themselves pulling an all-nighter in the lab. Alex is used to this kind of work, Lena slugs through it. “Hey, I read a conspiracy theory about you today.”

“Really? Was it good? Am I an alien yet, I’ve always wanted to be called an alien.” Alex finishes a measurement and yanks off her gloves.

“No, actually, someone apparently thinks that you’re not even on this expedition but actually in Italy with...get this: your rugby-playing boyfriend.” Lena seems to find it significantly less funny than Alex does.

“That’s the best they can come up with?” Lena rolls her eyes. “The idea that I’m straight is the most offensive part of that, by the way.”

“Aren’t rugby players kinda...jocky?”

“You’re just jealous 'cause you’re a giant nerd.” Lena whacks Alex’s stomach with the back of her hand. “A nerd with abs, very dynamic.”

Two hours later, they have their first kiss. It’s an accident. Lena’s lips brushing against Alex’s neck as they pull apart from a hug. The second kiss comes at full force. It’s Alex who initiates it and as she’s pulling Lena into her room, it’s Alex that pushes her away. “I can’t. Sorry, it’s not…” Alex covers her face with her hands. She groans and turns away. “This is wrong. It’s...it’s me, I don’t know what I’m doing.” If Lena had said something like neither do I, they might’ve continued kissing. But she doesn’t and as quickly as it began, their unfiltered romance surrounded by nature that is facing destruction head-on ends.

Lena does apologize. It comes a week later. Lena stands at Alex’s door wringing her hands. “Sorry about what happened. Kissing you. I shouldn’t have taken advantage, you’re grieving.”

“You didn’t. I kissed you,” Alex reminds her.

Alex gets an unprompted Skype call and when she sees Kara’s name she answers immediately. Kara looks at the camera all nervous and apologetic. “Sorry,” she mutters before pushing her webcam to the side and revealing Eliza.

“Alex, finally, I haven’t talked to you in weeks. How are you doing?” It feels like an I told you so waiting to happen. Suddenly, Lena’s in the room holding a deck of cards. Eliza’s eyes soften for some reason.

“Hey, sorry, just wondering if you wanted to play?” Lena asks.

“Oh-.”

“Go on, Alex, play with your friend,” Eliza insists. “We love you, dear. Kara and I are proud.” It’s the first time that Eliza sounds like she actually accepts Alex’s choice. Alex waves goodbye to Eliza and Kara before shutting off her computer and turning to Lena.

“Your mom’s kinda a babe,” Lena says immediately breaking the tension.

“Please, never say anything like that ever again.”

The third time they kiss, it’s after Lena has completely destroyed Alex in UNO. Alex suspects she’d rigged the game and when she goes to ask, Lena is busy putting her hair up in a ponytail. “You look nice,” Alex says pretending it’s the first time she’s noticed but it’s not. Lena’s smile is almost mischievous.

“I know. It’s the outfit that does the trick. I just love the sound of my synthetic pants.” Lena moves her legs against each other making the wosh wosh sound they hear every day as researchers milled about the hallway. “And I’m sure the bags under my eyes just add to the allure.”

“Totally.”

“Your flirting is weak sauce, Danvers. Bring it or get to the back of the line. I’ve got rugby admirers and conspiracy theorists galore.”

“I just want to kiss you.”

“Really? For real this time?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay.” They kiss and soon fall into Alex’s tiny bed together. As they’re scrambling to take their clothes off, Lena pulls the blanket over their bodies. “It’s fucking freezing.” She mouths against Alex’s collar. “I guess that’s what we signed up for.” Alex isn’t certain she had a plan coming into this but being around Lena somehow gave her permission to heal. She wasn’t certain what the world would throw her way next but she had another six months on an arctic expedition to figure it out.

#agentcorp #alex danvers #lena luthor #supergirl #fictober2019 #where's the in universe conspiracy theories about lena luthor?#like...i'd love to see what they're saying about her on reddit in the arrowverse

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sapphires-and-gold-fics · 5 years

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Fictober Day 15: “That’s what I’m talking about.”

Fandom: Game of Thrones / ASOIAF

Characters: Jaime Lannister / Brienne of Tarth... Sansa’s there too.

Read on AO3

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Sansa nudged Brienne with her shoulder and bit her lip, gesturing with her brows. “ That’s what I’m talking about!”

Brienne sighed and shook her head at her friend, she pulled a plastic-wrapped cheese sandwich out of her insulated lunch bag and picked at the saran wrap while peeking in the direction Sansa had pointed. “You’ve got to stop gawping at men across the park like this.”

“They’re not across the park!” the redhead rebuked with a smile and no volume control.

Brienne shot her a glare. “All the more reason to not gawp at them like that,” she muttered, finally freeing her sandwich and taking a bite.

Sansa smirked and uncapped her water bottle. “It’s not like I’m interested in any of them . They’re for you .” She took a long slow draw from the bottle, her throat undulating.

“I don’t know why you bother,” she said, looking pointedly away from the rocks. “I’m not looking, it’s ridiculous.”

“It’s fun, Brienne,” she whispered conspiratorially, “They’re hot, we’re hot, we’re all just… it’s fun!”

Brienne threw her head back in exasperation, extending her neck back until she felt a satisfying pop between her shoulder blades. “Sansa,” she muttered, “watching these guys pretend to rock climb in the middle of the park is not fun. They’re barely two feet off of the ground, hanging onto that boulder. They’re wasting all that chalk, and for what? So they can hang there and pretend it’s dangerous?”

“It’s for endurance, Brienne. And c’mon and it’s not just guys.”

“I don’t see your girlfriend over there.”

Sansa blushed slightly, then slapped Brienne’s shoulder, causing the taller woman to crane her neck toward her. “So you did look.”

Brienne groaned. “It’s not like there’s any point to this, Sansa. You’re hot - you should ask that girl out next time she’s here. The only thing I’m getting out of this entire venture is this cheese sandwich. And then I am going back to work to do,” she gestured toward the boulders, “exactly this.” She took another bite and chewed with her mouth open, watching Sansa with purpose.

Sansa shook her head. “This isn’t the best moment for it, but you don’t give yourself enough credit. When you’re not chewing with your mouth open, you’re a fucking prize, Tarth.”

Brienne shoved more sandwich in her mouth and moved closer to Sansa’s face, causing her friend to giggle openly and put out her hands to fend her off. Brienne gave up the chase, swallowed, and leaned back on the bench with a satisfied smirk, and suddenly a pair of bright green eyes met hers dead-on. “Uh…”

“Hey,” said the eyes, and the face around them with the golden tan.

“Hi?” Brienne replied to the soft burnished golden head of hair before her.

“Um, cool shoes. The color’s great.”

Brienne stared at him dumbly and then looked down at her scuffed cerulean Converse. “Um… thanks.”

The golden lion’s mane nodded. “Are you waiting your turn?”

“What?”

“For the rocks - I just figured since you’re sitting right here maybe there was a line or something?”

“Oh!” came Sansa’s reply, startling Brienne who had completely forgotten that anyone outside of this golden god existed. “No no no we’re just… lunching.”

“Oh, okay,” he said, still only really looking at Brienne, “you looked like a climber, so I figured…”

Brienne’s face was completely blank. “What?”

“Well your…,” he shrugged, his eyes crinkling slightly, “you’ve got great shoulders.”

Brienne felt her face burning. “Oh… thanks.”

Oh no, he had a dazzling smile, too.

“I’m probably too tall to even bother here, but the gym I usually climb at had a gas leak or something so I figured, what the hell?”

“Do I know you?” said Sansa, peering at him. “I could swear I’ve seen you, like in a tux or something.”

He finally seemed to notice that Sansa was another human being.

“Oh - um? Well, I wore a tux to a wedding last month?”

“Oh. My god. That’s it - you were at my uncle Ed’s wedding!”

“Oh! Yeah! I was from the bride’s side - the Frey family is old friends with my dad, and he couldn’t go so…”

“Gotcha.”

He pointed at her, “Tull, Stark, or Arryn then? I don’t know Ed well but I helped with the little um,” he formed a rectangle with his fingers.

“Place cards? For the tables?” Brienne guessed.

He turned his dazzling smile back to her, the sun catching the brightest blondes that seemed to be turning silver at the edges of his face.

“Yeah.”

“Stark,” said Sansa, “my mom’s a Tully. Ed’s her brother.”

“Ah, okay, cool.”

“Yeah... anyway Brienne’s a climber too but her gym has a wall, isn’t that right, Brienne?” Sansa was giving Brienne a knowing look that immediately faded into innocence.

“Right... What was I thinking?” He ran his fingers through his hair, “I’m an idiot - you’re what, 6’2”? 6’3”? That boulder’s probably puny to you. I get that. Um… I’m Jaime - you’re… Brienne?” She expected a joke about her height. She expected him to say that the climbers would be better off trying to climb her. But it didn’t come. She met his eyes, earnest as hell, and he was still smiling. She put out her hand to shake his. “Yeah… Brienne. And this is--”

But Sansa was gone.

“I think your friend um…” he gestured behind him with his other hand, still holding hers in his right, and Brienne could see that the girl Sansa had a crush on had arrived, and Sansa had actually walked over to talk to her. Sansa’s boldness inspired her own. She chuckled and firmed her handshake, then let go, tucking her hair behind her ears.

“My… um. Yeah, my gym has a wall.”

“But not a gas leak?”

She started laughing but when she realized it was coming out as a guffaw, she quieted. He was still looking at her like she was the only person in the park, but without censure. “No, no gas leak. At least not last I checked - I should actually get back there now.”

“Oh, okay.”

“It’s… it’s just a couple of blocks away, actually. I could give you the tour. Maybe you could try out the wall instead of roughing it in the park?”

There was a spark in Jaime’s eye. “Wait, it’s… it’s actually your gym?”

She smiled. “Yeah… that’s…. I own a gym.”

“That’s awesome .”

“Yeah… it is, I mean... yeah I guess.”

“No, it’s awesome. I know we just met and all but maybe I could… get a membership there since my usual place around the corner is uh indisposed.”

Brienne nodded. “Sure, yeah. I mean if you like it.”

“I bet I will. I’m - it’s weird, but I feel like it’s a sure thing.”

“Yeah, I think I get that.”

They peered dumbly at each other, eventually interrupted by the beeping of her watch.

“Ah, I promised Pod - the kid who works the desk - I told him I’d be back around now - would you maybe wanna… check me out now? I mean the gym. My gym. Check out my gym.” Her face was tomato red, and Jaime was obsessed with it immediately.

“Absolutely. Should we wait… for…”

“Sansa. Um.” Brienne looked over at Sansa who was doing just fine. Brienne shook her head. “No, she’ll be okay.”

“Cool. Lead the way, my lady.”

Brienne looked at him curiously and then broke out in a smile to match his. Like it was an inside joke they’d always had.

#fictober #fictober2019 #braime #jaime lannister #brienne of tarth #jaime x brienne #brienne x jaime #AO3 #AO3 link #mine #i love these idiots #put me back together

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identityvfictober2019 · 5 years

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Day 15 (Naib Subedar x Reader)

(”Scared, me?” - Day 15)

"Scared, me? Don't make me laugh." Naib scoffed as he was seated right next to you, his arms hugging his knees close to his chest. You were in the same position as him, your shoulder bumping against his.

A sly grin appeared on your lips. "Really? What if I do this," You started to knock and tap at the metal walls of the locker, increasingly getting louder.

Naib grabbed your hands and held them close together, "Shut up! He could have heard us!" He whispered at you. Just as he said that the both of you could hear your heartbeats pick up. You two immediately fell quiet.

"Shouldn't we get out of the closet? If he finds us in here. We're dead, you know?" You said quietly. One of you would be able to get away, but the other would get caught. Naib thought it over and released your hands, reaching out to push open the locker doors instead.

"I guess we should. We go our separate ways when we get out, okay?" You didn't have time to agree with his decision before the locker doors opened, but it wasn't Naib who initiated it. He quickly pushed you over and used his body to block yours; Waiting for the hit to come, but it didn't.

You let out a startled groan as you fell back against the locker wall, your hands pressing against his chest. "Ow..." You reached a hand back to rub the back of your head while Naib glanced over his shoulder, glaring at the person who opened the locker.

"What the hell, Vera!" He whisper-yelled at her. She blocked the entrance of the locker, a smug grin on her lips as she assessed the position that both you and Naib were stuck in.

"Well~ you two look like you're having fun." She then slowly closed the locker doors, "I'll leave you two lovebirds to it! I'll lead the Ripper as far away as I can." With that, Vera was off. You could hear her giggling to herself as she ran.

Naib let out an angry breath of relief before he turned back around to look at you. The tips of his ears and his cheeks went red. He had you caged in due to his arms, and he now noticed your hands pressing against his chest. Your face was equally red as you looked the other way.

"Mind getting off now?.."

"Y-yeah, sure."

Just as he was about to move off of you, the locker doors opened; Both of your hearts beating. Yours and Naib's eyes were wide open in shock as the both of you stared at the Ripper, who stared back at you two. It was silent for a few seconds before he reaches his hand to his face, rubbing his forehead.

"There's a time and a place for everything, you two. A locker in the middle of a match is not ideal." He chastised before pulling you and Naib out of the locker. He swiftly tied balloons to Naib and nudged you to go on. "Go on, my dear. Mr.Subedar and I need to have a small talk."

"NO, WE DON'T! PUT ME DOWN!" Naib started to struggle and flail around. You could only stand there looking shocked as you watched Ripper walk away with Naib.

(this is extra)

"Hey, wait! Get back here! We want the 4-person win!" You cried out and chased after them, ready to tackle Jack if you had to.

#identity-v #identityv #identity v naib #identity v ripper #fictober #fictober2019 #fictober19 #oneshots #xreader

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ink-on-parxhment · 5 years

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waiting on a sunny day

Fandom: TAZ: Amnesty

Rating: T

Warnings: body image issues

Prompt: “Listen, really listen”

Summary:

Aubrey tilts forward, gets up on her tiptoes so she can kiss her. There’s a warmth in her chest that she only knows as love and the wildflowers blooming around them can attest to it.

“Then what’s wrong?” She asks, and from this close she can see each micro-expression as Dani goes from content to anxious to resolved.

“This is what I looked like on Earth.” Just like that, realization slams through her.

Sylvain, even in this early spring era of her life cycle, is beautiful, and that is something Aubrey doesn’t think anyone will ever convince her differently of.

She can see the bare places: dark, twisted areas that the Quell ravaged, husks of trees that had stood for centuries, roadways laid in ruin. But everywhere they turn, there’s life. It’s isn’t just her powers either. It’s deep green moss growing on the cracks of broken structures and creeping, hardy vines crawling over downed trees. Everywhere they go, she sees things that have survived, and as they travel farther she starts to see sprouts of brighter, more fragile plants. Thin flower stems with bright petals reaching for light, new growth on tree branches, what is obviously the first fruit harvest many of these regions have had in years.

And then they sweep through, and while it’s fun every time she is and always will be in awe of the power Sylvain has given her. It’s enough, she knows, to just walk through and cast, but most days she reaches for Dani’s hand and they go running, bare feet in lush grass, as flowers bloom and trees come to life around them.

It is work, and they have not gotten anywhere near where they need to, but it is paradise.

They’ve stopped in a large meadow, surrounded by trees and the foot of a hill. There’s a pond near where they’ve set up their camp, and a road that looks like it hasn’t seen travels since even before the Quell. It is warm, she’s nurtured fruit trees into existence, and now it’s time to rest.

She catches Dani looking at her reflection in the pond, her eyes intent and her mouth set in a grim line. She wouldn’t think anything of it normally; they haven’t been in an area with mirrors in at least a week, so she understands. What makes her pause is the way her jaw goes from relaxed to tense and after a few seconds her shoulders are practically by her ears when as far as Aubrey can tell she’s as unharmed and beautiful as she’s ever been. Then she catches Aubrey looking at her over her shoulder and does a Duck-worthy performance of acting like she wasn’t looking at her reflection.

It makes something cold and spiky erupt in Aubrey’s chest.

She walks forward, stops just close enough to Dani to reach out for her hand. Her hand hangs there, palm up in the warm air, and she waits until Dani reaches out and interlaces their fingers, her eyes never leaving Aubrey’s face. Dani pulls her closer, and it’s impossible to keep the smile off her face when she does. The small grin Dani sends her makes the panic in her chest ease a little, but then Dani looks back at the still surface of the pond and her smile disappears.

“Hey,” she says, swinging their hands closer to her, “talk to me. What’s wrong.”

She smiles, just a little, and Aubrey’s heart thuds a little harder just like it does every time Dani smiles at her. Dani squeezes her hand, bites her lip with blunt teeth. “We’re in Sylvain. We live in Sylvain now.”

Panic floods through Aubrey like cold water. They’ve been here for a couple months, and they’ve been helping people that entire time. The scene of Dani making the decision to come back here flashes through her mind, as does every time she’s smiled at her since they’ve come back.

“Do you, do you regret it?” She has to know.

Dani scrunches her eyebrows, shakes her head a little bit. The obvious confusion on her face lifts a weight off Aubrey’s chest. “No. No. Of course not.”

Dani looks around, eyes catching on the grove of trees they’d watch grow into flower and the moss-covered edges of the pond. “This is what we’re meant to be doing, Aubrey. You’re—you’re bringing this place back to life, and I get to be here to see that. And yes, I would like to see our friends on Earth again, but Aubrey, I already told you, you’re my home. I can’t imagine being anywhere else.”

Aubrey tilts forward, gets up on her tiptoes so she can kiss her. There’s a warmth in her chest that she only knows as love and the wildflowers blooming around them can attest to it.

“Then what’s wrong?” She asks, and from this close she can see each micro-expression as Dani goes from content to anxious to resolved.

“This is what I looked like on Earth.” She says, and her brown eyes are staring right into Aubrey’s. “This is what I looked like for Earth. We don’t live on Earth anymore; we can’t even get there.”

And, yeah. Dani’s got blonde hair down to her waist that Aubrey has a hard time keeping her hands out of now that she’s allowed to play with it. She’s got brown eyes that look like amber, like gold, in the sunlight. Aubrey has lost count of the times she’s tried to count the freckles across the bridge of her nose, along her shoulders.

“You’re from Earth, Aubrey. I don’t look like this.”

The realization of what is happening hits her like a train, and she abruptly feels extremely unobservant. She’s seen Dani in her true form a few times, but it was few and far between. It had been easier before Agent Stern, but after he showed up no one really showed their true forms. The most notable time was during the shapeshifter debacle, right after Ned, and by that point she was too busy to take in too many details.

She’s moving before she’s really thinking about it, pulling their hands up to chest height so she can take her other hand and undo the clasp that holds her illusion bracelet with gentle fingers. As soon as the corded bracelet leaves her skin the illusion is gone, Dani’s razor-sharp nails resting against the knuckles of Aubrey’s hand. When she looks up, Dani is smiling tremulously, too sharp teeth glinting in the sunlight. She opens her mouth, starts to say something, stops and shakes her head instead. Silver-blonde hair comes untucked from pointed ears.

She’s iridescent.

“Listen, really listen to me. You stayed with me through the end of the world. I love you, you, and I have for a long time. Never think that you have to change a single part of yourself for me.”

Dani grins, eyes like molten gold, and brings their hands up so she can press a kiss to Aubrey’s knuckles. “I love you too, Aubrey Little.”

Aubrey catches a glimpse of them in the water out of the corner of her eye, backlit by the sunset, and smiles as they go tumbling into lush wildflowers.

#fictober19 #fictober2019 #taz #taz amnesty #taz amnesty spoilers #danbrey #fluff

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awkwardnessandbaseball · 5 years

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Fictober 2019: No Imitations

Prompt number: One

Fandom (AU if applicable): Once Upon a Time

Pairing: Captain Swan

Rating: T

Warnings/Tags: Brief mention of childhood neglect

(AO3 if that’s your jam)

@fictober-event

—

“Killian, I really hate heights,” Emma whined. Her boyfriend was dragging her down the Pavilion towards a very, very high ferris wheel.

“This ride offers the best views in Vegas, Swan! It’ll be fun. Trust me,” he begged.

He never asked for much. He’d asked her out to begin with, of course, and then had let her come to him in her own time. He’d never pushed, never slammed into her metaphorical walls aggressively, preferring to tap at them gently until he found the cracks in them naturally. He didn’t ask her for attention, for affection, for time. He let her give as much or as little as she wanted.

This trip had been no different. They’d been talking about getting away, but they were on a semi-limited budget. So a few days in a cheesy casino/hotel combination in Las Vegas might not have been the most relaxing vacation, but there were Groupons on Groupons on Groupons for cheap hotel rooms and even discounted event tickets. So while it wasn’t exactly the a cruise through Caribbean, it was still something Emma had been looking forward to. It had been Killian’s suggestion, but he’d let her take the reins, allowing her to pick all of their activities, save for the last day of their trip. He’d said he’d wanted to plan just that one day and she’d agreed.

But she hadn’t known that it would entail… this. The ferris wheel loomed over her, lit up against the night sky.

Now, Killian Jones wouldn’t be pushing her to do this dumb (scary) ride if he didn’t have a very good reason. It didn’t slip past Emma that she’d only just told Killian about her fear of heights two weeks before he’d chosen Vegas as their destination of choice.

“I was stranded for hours,” Emma admitted. “My foster parents forgot I was on the ride and left the carnival entirely, and then the stupid ride broke and--” She’d promised herself she wouldn’t cry - the carnival story was twenty years ago, she should have moved on by now. She shouldn’t be crying. But there she was, sobbing about a fucking ferris wheel while her boyfriend looked at her with nothing but pity.

Great.

“That’s horrifying, love. Of all the stories of your past that you’ve told me, that certainly sounds like one of the worst.” He stood then and held her. It was that simple for him: she was sad, so he’d make it better. If words wouldn’t do it, perhaps a hug.

It worked. At least a little.

“Killian, please stop walking for one second.”

He stopped and turned to her, squeezing her hand once.

“Emma, I won’t force you to do this if you really don’t want to.” He took her other hand, apparently not caring that they’d stopped in the middle of a busy walkway (much to the annoyance of the passersby if their grumbles were any indication). “But I really think you’ll enjoy it. I wouldn’t ask you to do it if I didn’t truly believe that.” He was looking right into her eyes in that special way - the one he only used when he really wanted her to listen to him.

She sighed.

“Fine. But you can’t make me look out the window.”

He laughed and hugged her, pulling her flush against him. A soft deal was whispered from his mouth to her ear, followed by a kiss to her cheek.

“Alright, mate, we’ve got tickets for three trips ‘round,” Killian told the ticket taker.

“Three?” Emma screeched. “That wasn’t what I agreed to.” Killian looked at her, smirked, and turned back to the employee.

“When we get done the first time, if she wants to get off, we will. Ladies’ choice.”

Emma grumbled the whole time they climbed into their small pod. There was a ton of space, but it was all empty.

“Why is no one else in here with us? There were like thirty people in the last one.” Emma sat on one of the plush couches, facing anywhere that wasn’t outside.

“I bought the whole room.” Killian stood by the window, his back to Emma.

“You did what?” She still wasn’t looking at him.

“I bought it so it’s private. Just you and me.”

Before she could question this huge financial decision Killian had made without her, music started. Their song started. Emma looked up, only to see Killian setting up his phone and some portable speaker on the floor.

And when the morning comes and the sunlight’s creepin’ And you wanna hide underneath your sheets Even wide awake with your makeup streakin’ You’re still a dream

“Killian, what are you doing?”

“Would you like to dance, Emma?”

“Killian, what are you doing?” Her voice came out as more of a hiss. She turned towards the window only to have Killian step in front of her.

“Just look at me, Emma. Nothing else. Let’s dance, love.” He held out his hand and she took it, realizing she was shaking.

“You know I don’t dance, Killian.” She stood as she said it, giving in to her gut feeling: she wanted to trust him.

“What do I tell you every time you try to get out of dancing with me, Swan?” He twirled her around the empty room, keeping himself directly in her line of vision. They danced slowly, even during the fast-paced chorus of the song.

Now that I found you, I won’t accept no imitations. No, I don’t want nobody else. No, I don’t want nobody.

“‘Pick a partner who knows what he’s doing.’” She laughed at her own imitation of his accent. He didn’t laugh with her, just smiled fondly.

“That’s right,” he responded softly. “And that’s me, for better or worse. Your partner, in this and in all things.”

Emma felt like something bigger was happening. Something bigger than her fear of heights or this dumb ferris wheel or the entire city of Las Vegas.

She felt her heart stutter in her chest.

When the song ended, Killian suddenly turned her around. He kept his arms around her waist as she found herself directly in front of the window. Her body shook but Killian rubbed soothing motions on her arms. Their song started playing again.

The view was beautiful. The sky was pitch black and the lights of the city shone below them. She couldn’t make out any people, they were so high up, just moving blobs. She looked out and the city seemed endless.

Oh.

“How you doing, Swan?” Killian whispered against her cheek. “We can sit if you need to.” His hands didn’t stop moving up and down her arms, keeping her grounded.

“No,” she replied so quietly she wasn’t sure if he’d even heard her. “I’m okay.” He nodded and she felt the movement against her shoulder.

“I’m going to step back quickly, okay? You’re alright?”

Emma nodded. Tears filled her eyes. What had she been missing by not looking down all these years? She’d avoided roller coasters and ferris wheels and hotel rooms any higher than eight stories up. She’d never seen anything like this.

“Emma?” Killian asked behind her - she’d almost forgotten he was there, engrossed as she was with the city below her. She turned to find him with one knee on the ground and a box in his hand.

Oh fuck.

“I meant what I said. About being your partner in all things.” He was sweating, Emma could see. Just a small line of sweat across his hairline, it would have been barely noticeable to anyone else. But Emma knew what Killian’s tells were. Sure enough, he reached up with his right hand, balancing the ring box on his prosthetic left, and scratched behind his ear. “If you’ll have me, that is. What I mean to say is… Emma Swan, will you marry me?”

“Yes.” She heard herself answer, felt a smile creep up her face, tasted the tears that were falling from her eyes. “Yes, a million times, yes.”

He stood and pulled her to him.

The door to the pod opened as their lips met.

“Another round, mate. Thanks.” Killian growled, not moving away from Emma for even a moment.

The door closed again, and their song started back up, and they kissed the whole way around, missing the view from the top. So they went around again, and by the end, Emma wasn’t so afraid of heights anymore.

#captain swan #cs fic #cs fanfic #fictober2019 #cs ff

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w-re-writes · 5 years

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Fictober 2019 - Day 10 - “it’s not snails (he swears)”

Fandom: A Song of Ice and Fire / Game of Thrones

Pairing: Jaime Lannister / Brienne of Tarth

Word Count: 1178

Warnings: None

Prompt: “Listen, I can’t explain it, you’ll have to trust me.”

It's never good when Jaime shows up insisting Brienne must see something. But it's definitely not snails (he swears on it).

(read on ao3)

-------------------------------------------------------

Unbidden, Jaime trotted into the yard.

“Brienne, come,” he panted. “You have to see this.”

Brienne arched an eyebrow from her spot on the grass. “What is it?”

Jaime Lannister was many things. He had first been her next door neighbor, later her bike racer nemesis, then baseball teammate, and now friend. But in five years of friendship, he’d always prefaced every problem they’d ever gotten into with ‘you have to see this.’ Experience cautioned her.

“Listen, I can’t explain it, you’ll have to trust me. Come.”

He offered her a sweaty palm.

“I swear, if this is about those snails again..."

“Giant snails,” Jaime corrected airily, glancing up at the sky. “And no. Stop being so stubborn, Bri. Just come.”

He tilted his head at her and smiled.

Jaime had always been beautiful, but sometime around last year, it had changed. It did things to her, that smile. Things she wasn’t sure she felt comfortable feeling. Not for Jaime. Her best friend.

But this is how they played. She held her notebook up for him to see and shook it.

“But homework.”

He rolled his eyes. “For fuck's sake, woman.”

Jaime tossed her notebook away and took her hand, already whirling on his heels. “Just come.”

Brienne let herself follow, repressing a giggle. She liked opposing him, even if she knew Jaime probably had an adventure at hand, just to rail him up.

Dusk was already starting, but he led her across the hedge, past the tree house, above the fence, and into the woods. There had been a time when they ran and played at knights and dragons among the trees, each one taking turns to hack brooms against the trunks and shout at the top of their lungs, ducking from regretfully imaginary dragonfire. Now it was calm, maybe even too quiet. Things had gotten in the way of their games, she supposed. School. Baseball. Age.

“Jaime, where are we going?” Brienne whispered, trying not to think of Jaime’s hand still clasped in hers.

“Shh. Just follow me.”

She obliged, because of course she did. She always did. Ever since he had stood up for her when stupid Ron Connington had called her ugly in the playground. It had been right after she’d beaten them all in a bike race, and all the other kids had laughed at his japes. Jaime had not. The dust had cleared afterwards to reveal a distraught Brienne forcing a winning, black-eyed Jaime away from the brawl. It felt like a lifetime ago. It had also been glorious.

Jaime kept pressing forward, marching across the blue creek where they used to hunt for frogs, and then beyond the bush where he had found her on the anniversary of her brother’s death.

Brienne swallowed. “Jaime, shouldn't you be studying?”

Jaime shot a quick glance over his shoulder, without slowing down.

“Pfft. This is more important.”

Brienne bit her lip. His dad had plans for him. The Old Lion, as Jaime called him, wanted his first born son to follow in the family's steps and become something big. Neither Jaime nor Brienne knew exactly what, but Jaime was meant to start next year at an elite Targaryen school in King’s Landing, so stupidly refined they called themselves the Kingsguard. And that meant he had to pass his admission exams. And that meant less best friend time.

But she hated bringing that up. And so did he.

So Brienne settled for snark.

“Is it, like, snail-level of importance?”

“Giant snails, Bri!” He gave a short laugh. “Admit it, they were cool. Like the ones in medieval tapestries and everything.”

“Ugh. Nerd.”

“Crone.”

They reached the giant white rock at the foot of their favorite hill, where they used to pretend they climbed the highest mountain in the world, even if it was so covered in vegetation they were never able to see beyond the lowest branches.

Jaime continued up the slope, picking up the pace.

“If we hurry,” he told her, all smiles, all beauty, “we’ll see it.”

Brienne followed, allowing herself the treat of admiring the view. His golden hair now brushed past his jaw, and Brienne liked how his curls moved with the breeze and framed his face. She also liked how he laughed, and how he teased her, and how kind he was even if he tried to hide it, and how he had a soft spot for his young brother, and how he always put himself in front of her when they had to face someone down, even if she had been taller than him since they’d met. She liked him very, very much.

That trail of thought always made her dizzy. And it made her feel young, too young. Inadequate. She was 15, she was not naive. But she felt afraid. Afraid of how strongly she felt about her best in the whole wide world. About him leaving. And about a million other things, and the reasons to not talk about them.

Jaime stopped so suddenly she almost bumped into him. With one last grin, he pushed her past him and onto the top of the hill.

Someone had cut the trees on the other side, Brienne lamented. But then she saw they cleared a window directly into the valley below and the mountains far away. The sunset light caught in the clouds, rippling with reds and yellows and oranges.

“Jaime,” she gasped as the light changed and the colors danced in the sky. “It’s beautiful.” The tres had never let them see this in all its glory.

When he didn’t reply, she turned to him. His green eyes were already locked on her, shining in the afternoon glow.

“I told you it wasn’t snails,” he grinned.

She gave him an honest laugh. “It’s gorgeous.”

“It’s dragonfire.” Jaime stepped behind her, getting so close she could feel his breath on her ear. He stretched an arm so she would follow the line he traced in the air. “I found it yesterday. See? That’s Drogon Peak. The clouds are smoke.”

Brienne’s eyes opened wide. “And he’s breathing fire.”

She felt him nod on her shoulder. “Like in our games.”

“Thank you,” she heard herself say, softly, as the colors began to dim.

Jaime let his hand drop until it reached her arm. Then, hesitantly, he girded his other arm around her waist, searching for her other hand. Brienne swallowed, but didn’t push him away.

He tightened the hug, his chin nudging her shoulder, his heart on her back. He was warm, and he smelled like pine and dust. Like Jaime.

“Thank you,” he whispered. And he pressed a quick peck on her cheek, right below her ear.

Brienne felt her head spin. It was familiar and new and exciting and absolutely terrifying, all at the same time. She felt herself relaxing in his arms, drunk in sunlight and memories and Jaime.

Jaime, who was many things. Golden. A snail fan. Stubborn. Leaving. And her best friend.

So she allowed herself, just for that moment, to be extremely happy.

#fictober19 #fictober2019 #jaime x brienne #brienne x jaime #asoiaf #look i finished one of them #i'm posting it to get a dose of dopamine #and to say it's fluffy #and not too good #but there's only one way to move forward #so thanks if you read it #*sigh*

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poofmininx · 5 years

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¡Hola a todos ustedes! Aquí Alis en mi segunda cuenta, he venido para iniciar este perfil con mis trabajos de historias para Wattpad en Español, donde el fandom es... ¡CountryHumans!

Principalmente inicio esto por igual con el Fictober de este año, y bueno... Aquí les dejaría la portada, la cual he editado con la aplicación de PicsArt, ¡espero les guste!

Por lo mismo espero y lo lean, siendo medio nueva en el fandom (1 mes aproximadamente).

Y, sin más, ¡gracias por su atención!

Atte.

AlisKittinGatito.

(VioletteNion en Wattpad)

Apodo: Alis/Ali/Yansi.

Escritora mexicana en Wattpad osí. <3

#countryhumans #wattpad #historia #fictober2019 #español #fanfic #oneshots

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robinlestrange · 5 years

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Fictober 2019: I can't come back" by Robin LeStrange - Cormoran Strike series

What might have happened if Coco hadn't picked up the phone...

#fictober2019 #fictober prompts #fictober #fictober19 #fictoromantic #cormoran x robin #cormoran and robin #cormoran strike #robin ellacott #honeymoon

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kibuto · 4 years

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Fictober 2019 - Prompt 30

Prompt: 30. I'm with you, you know that Fanfiction: Dragon Age Inquisition Characters/Pairings: Pavellan (Dorian Pavus and Tamvir Lavellan) Warnings: None

Of course they couldn't have the meeting at Skyhold. The Inquisitor's relationship with a man from Tevinter was contentious, but grudgingly accepted by most. The arrival of anyone else from Tevinter, especially an actual Magister, would cause more uproar than Tamvir, Josephine, or anyone else in the inner circle wanted to deal with. Dorian in particular had very little desire to deal with anything related to Magister Halward Pavus.

Eventually Dorian had, with clear resentment to having to do so, consented to meet once again as they had before in Redcliffe. He had even acquiesced to Tam's request to come with him. Tam doubted it had anything to do with his ability to actually do something should Magister Halward make any moves to do something untoward. The only thing he had going for himself was his title and whatever weight it carried.

The descent from Skyhold had been quiet, Dorian not having much desire to chat and Tam not wanting to push him. They'd even ridden separately; Tam on his mount and Dorian on a horse borrowed from the stables. It was strange to not have the simple closeness of riding double.

As much as Tam wanted to give Dorian his space, to respect his need for solitude, he desperately wanted to know what was going on inside Dorian's head. Dorian was always there for him; it felt wrong that Tam wasn't able to offer the same sort of comforting shoulder to lean on.

"Dorian--" Tam started.

"So--" Dorian said at the same moment.

Tam couldn't help the chuckle that escaped him, and hearing the same from Dorian gave him a warm little fizzle of relief. "You first."

"I was just thinking how similar this is to the last time we did this," Dorian admitted. "Though hopefully this time I act like less of a complete ass toward you."

"You were scared and angry and you lashed out, Dorian." Tam shook his head. "I don't blame you for how you acted then." He smiled, blushing, and looked down at his hands holding the reins. "You've more than made up for it."

Dorian's laughter was worth every fragment of Tam's embarrassment from saying the words. It thawed more of the ice that had been clogging the space between them.

"Let's perhaps not go telling that little fact to my father," Dorian suggested, his mirth fading back into seriousness. At least he wasn't as tense as he'd been before. Tam had to find silver linings everywhere he could.

"Definitely not." The last thing Tamvir wanted to do was go discussing his and Dorian's relationship in detail, especially with someone who frowned on it even more than the Chantry sisters. "But whatever this is about, whatever he wants... I'm with you, Dorian. I hope that you always know that."

Dorian nudged his horse in closer, getting their two mounts to walk side by side and allowing him to reach out a hand that Tam clasped. "I wouldn't be doing this if I wasn't with you. At the risk of sounding dreadfully sentimental, with you at my side there is nothing I can't do."

Tam smiled and gave his hand a squeeze before letting go. "Including travel through time," he pointed out. "I don't think I'll ever forget that."

"How could either of us?" Dorian quipped, then shuddered. "We're all lucky that I am as brilliant as I am handsome. A lesser mage never would have been able to get us out of that mess."

Tam didn't need to call Dorian on his exaggeration. They both knew how utterly terrified he'd been in that instant with everything riding on his shoulders. But it had been the first instance where they had needed to trust each other implicitly, and that success had eventually led them to where they were now. What was dealing with family, when they had already faced down so much?

"You're right," Tam said instead. "I truly am the luckiest man in all Thedas."

#Dragon Age #fictober19 #Fictober2019 #Pavellan #Dorian Pavus #Tamvir Lavellan #Ki writes stuff #I know it's June #but fuck it #time is a myth

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unlockthelore · 5 years

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Ashes to Ashes

Title: Her Name is Love

Chapter 4: Ashes to Ashes

Fandom: 幽☆遊☆白書 | YuYu Hakusho: Ghost Files

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Mentions of blood, drowning, and child neglect.

Prompt #: 4

Relationship: Hiei/Kurama | Minamino Shuuichi

Character(s): Hiei (YuYu Hakusho), Kurama | Minamino Shuuichi

Additional Tags: Developing Relationship, Post-Canon, Japanese Mythology & Folklore, POV Alternating, Attempt at Humor, Feelings Realization, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, Hurt and Comfort

Notes: Reposted from AO3.

Summary: Decades later, the memories still plague him and in these moments, he tries to remember that he doesn’t always have to be strong.

Cold had never been an issue for him on the outside. The tingling sensation on his skin, frost inching its way across the hilt of his sword as he gripped tighter, pricking his lungs as he took ragged breaths. It was never feeling cold on the outside that he had to worry about but the cold on the inside was troublesome. It happened rarely but often enough to give him pause and annoyance. Memories playing in his mind, reliving the feeling of his arms and legs being bound, unable to burn away the wrappings littered with wards. The small opening that he was allowed giving him a view of the sleeping baby that he’d been snatched away from, a young woman with tears in crimson red eyes, her hair undone and her clothes a mess as she tried to claw her way toward him. The other women holding her at bay, bidding her calm, to understand .

He hadn’t understood, the cold pricking his lungs was different than the cool that she provided, it bespoke of pain when she gave him care. The memory of her love would steadily fade, only to return anew, as the tune of the song that she sang to him and the baby that he lied beside would be hummed in the stillness of his bedroom. Pulling his knees to his chest, curling up tightly with his forehead resting on his arms, he could feel the tightness of the cocoon. See the woman holding him, fighting back tears as she marched on to the edge of the cliff. There was reluctance in the set of her jaw, he could practically see the gears in her mind turning, but he’d already decided that he hated her.

He felt no pity for her as a tear rolled down her cheek, crystallizing in the frigid wind and blowing away to rest amidst the stone. The words that she spoke to him, the “kindness” that she gave him, and the purpose that she cursed him with were all tucked within that cocoon. His eyes narrowed and he glared at her, unable to voice his displeasure, and his flames were muted by the wards. Yet as she held out her hands, he felt weightlessness, his heart dropping to the pit of his stomach. He wondered what his face looked like then. Were his eyes wide? Did she look at him as he fell? He wasn’t sure, because the moment that she moved to let go, the young woman who’d been yelling and screaming for them to stop broke free of her captors.

She ran toward them, kicking up snow as she went, practically tripping over her own feet and the clothes she wore. More of the frigid women who’d been looking on grabbed her and kept her at bay. Their tears, crystallizing in the wind, were not for him but hers were. He stared at her and kept his eyes on her as she begged and pleaded for them to let him go. One of the elders looked down and shook her head, assuring her that this was the best thing for them all, then turned to the woman who was holding him with wide eyes. His eyes met her own, Rui , they called her — and he wondered if she could see it in his face.

Please don’t let me go.

Her eyes closed and the tears rolled down her cheek as her fingers uncurled from beneath him and he fell . The air was cold, his grip on the twine necklace tight, and he couldn’t move. There was nothing he could do to defend himself, not even warm himself against the winds that tossed him one way then the other. The urge to cry was lost on him, the tears burning in his eyes evaporating into the sky. He wasn’t sure how long he fell but the world below him but when he hit the water, his panic set in.

Water filled his lungs and his eyes widened, instinctively keeping his mouth closed rather than crying. There was no need to cry. No one would hear him. And no one would come for him. He wasn’t sure how long he spent within the river, the greedy rat-faced bandit that tried to snatch the stone from him as if it was a glittering gem ripe for the picking in the water, was met with a sharp bite to the hand. Coughing up the water in his lungs, glaring at him as he yelled and demanded the stone to be released, he was bitten at every attempt to dislodge it. Eventually taking one of the looser bandages to pull him along to his camp, present him to his leader, and his family —

Hiei gritted his teeth and lifted his head. What had once been early morning now looked to be afternoon and he glanced towards the window with tired eyes, feeling the weariness in his neck and his arms, as he stretched them out. There were dishes set at the foot of the bed, they were empty, and he hadn’t remembered eating but from the taste in his mouth — he must have unconsciously. A need to live, a need to survive, even if his mind wasn’t there, his body was still conscious. He wasn’t sure whether to be happy or sad about that.

Climbing off the bed, he pulled on his sweatpants and picked up the dishes one by one. He recognized the contents by their leftovers. His favorites, all prepared in the way that he liked them, and he knew that he had Kurama to thank. Looking to the empty space that had grown cold in the time that he’d been lying unresponsive, he wondered how many times the fox tried to rouse him from his thoughts until he decided to go on and make breakfast. A stab of guilt cinched Hiei’s heart. He’d have to make it up to him later, he thought as he shuffled downstairs, taking the steps one at a time with his arm brushing against the wall.

The kitchen was empty and most of the pots and pans were cleaned and put away. Setting the dishes aside, he turned on the sink and rested his arms on the counter with his chin resting in his palm. Listening to the water drumming against the sink made his mind wander to a rusted tin basin, his legs dangling off the stool as the water was dumped over his head. Soap and other manner of herbs rubbed into his hair over and over, a melody hummed low as he stared at his own reflection in the basin. The sound of the other bandits laughing and carrying on after their raid had been successful carried through the woods and to the little cave that Hiei had chosen for himself. Further away from the main camp, where the others wouldn’t have to see the blood on his hands and caked beneath his nails, smearing his face and the slight smile on his lips.

He’d heard them before. Whispers and wandering eyes when he tore his blade through a guard or felled a rivaling bandit who tried to take their treasure. He would smile like a child playing a game and they often commented that they were glad he was on their side. It made him feel happy, he was wanted , but the looks —

He glanced down at his reflection in the basin, letting the soap and water drain from his hair after dousing himself with another bucket. A cherubic face stared back at him, wide-eyed and confused, and he tried to smile but faltered. Pressing his fingers to the corner of his lips then scowling as he curled in on himself.

What was so wrong about smiling?

The leader of their outfit had complimented him on a job well done but nothing more than that. It was often hard to get two words out of the man, let alone praise. Admonishments for what a man should be. Seeking results rather than praise. Treasure rather than recognition. In short, stay out of my way and things will be fine.

If he was praised for killing, for helping them pillage, why did they look at him like that?

Like he was some sort of monster.

A featherlight touch to his shoulder, soft fingertips running over the scars and marks on his back before pulling away, carefully returning him from the child looking in the tin basin to the man looking into the sink. He knew who it was without even looking to confirm. Roses, potent and comforting, an earthiness that reminded him of not only the Makai but the Ningenkai, a hint of vanilla and chamomile — it was Kurama, no doubt.

“I can take care of it,” Kurama said, his voice soft and grounding.

Easing himself away from him, Hiei pulled himself up on the counter and rested his hands in his lap. His head bowed and his shoulders hunched, staring at the floor as he inched away from the dishes and the sink to give him room.

“Sorry,” he muttered.

He couldn’t remember when he last talked since this feeling struck him but it was for the best. His voice was rough and sounded hollow to his own ears, a grimace on his lips as he brought a hand to his lips.

“You have nothing to apologize for.”

He glanced at Kurama, the fox’s sleeves rolled up as he washed the dishes. A task that Hiei knew that he could have done if he were in the right state of mind. Cursing his weakness and leaving Kurama to have to care for him again , he grumbled and reached up for his ward. Belatedly realizing that he must have taken it off at some point in the night. His memories of receiving the Jagan Eye made it so that he didn’t sleep very well either.

Fingers twitching, lightly running down his forehead, he pressed his face into his palm. “I’m pathetic,” muttered against his skin as if the words could seep into his bones.

“No, you aren’t, Hiei.”

He knew that it should have warmed him. Kurama was the Legendary King of Thieves, he was known for discarding those who weren’t useful to him, but he was different now — they both were.

“It happened a long time ago, I should be past it.”

The light clinking of dishes tells him that they’re being put away, and he’s grateful when the running water is shut off. Pressing his fingers to his eyes, he pulls them away slightly when he hears Kurama’s voice on the other side of him.

“Everyone handles things differently,” Kurama said, toweling off his hands, green eyes centered on him.

Hiei wrinkled his nose and leant back, resting his head against the wall as he stared up at the ceiling. The light fixture, the dips, and grooves, the vines that ran along the top of the cupboards and over the walls. Anything that would ground him rather than let him slip off into the reaches of his mind. His gaze drops to the mark on his arm and he curls his fingers into a fist. If he’d had this power sooner, then they all would have suffered.

The frigid demonesses who tossed him from that peak.

The bandits who used his strength for their own personal gain.

They would all suffer and the Dragon seemed to agree, the mark pulsing violet.

“I should have killed them all when I had the chance.”

“You didn’t,” Kurama said, and Hiei glanced at him, the frown curving the fox’s lips downward and the slight twitch in his fingers as he settled near the wall. Close but too far. “You can’t change what’s already happened.”

Deep down, Hiei knew that Kurama was right. He’d told him the same in a manner of speaking when the fox had come face to face with a pretender attempting to guilt him with his memories of Kuronue. A person who did not bear scars on their soul was a shallow one, the scars making them who they are, and yet his own opened anew when he least expected it. Genkai had once told him that he and Yukina bore scars that they covered and ignored. That one day, those scars would bleed to the point where neither of them could stand it, and that is when they would heal.

If the psychic was alive, Hiei would have thanked her for the horrific symbolism and possibly brought her a tea blend to say that she was right. He felt this anger building up inside of him but he knew that it was over. There was nothing more that he could do. True, he could have found the bandit outfit that abandoned him but what would he say?

He was able to return to the island of Hyouga but what would it yield?

They were already dead inside, and the bandits were inconsequential, there was no honor among thieves after all. Yet somehow it hurt.

The ceiling blurred, the burn of tears at the back of his eyes and the pressure was something that he knew to ignore. There was no reason to cry. No one would hear him. No one would care. A mantra that he told himself from the time that he was a child curled up in tree boughs, humming himself to sleep.

“I was a fool for believing it would be anything other than what it was. Family ,” he spat the word, feeling the twitch in his face and curled his fingers into his palm, pressing tightly till the skin burned. “Once I was no longer wieldy, they cast me aside like a misshapen tool. Feeding lies to influence complacency, encouraging behaviors until it no longer suited them.”

All of the fun that he thought they were having. All of the joy that he’d known for the short period of his life. The feeling of friendship, the feeling of camaraderie, of family — it was all a lie. An illusion to keep him there, and keep them safe, a glorified bloodhound and nothing more.

“The Void would have been too good,” he grimaced.

Kurama said nothing for a moment. Hiei heard the rustling of the towel as it was hung with the others, the scraping of a chair and the light thump as the fox likely sat in it.

“You’re allowing them to win by taking over your thoughts like this,” Kurama said, his voice soft and yet firm. “You’re allowed to feel hurt and anger because of your past, Hiei. There’s no shame in it.”

No shame. He squeezed his eyes shut and breathed in deep. Their home wasn’t cold, it was warm, and there was no prickling in his lungs but the pressure behind his eyes made it hard for him to look anywhere else. He didn’t trust himself. Not like this.

“...You’re too far away, Kurama,” he muttered, hearing the shift and the featherlight footfalls as he approached.

Hiei knew how quiet Kurama could be. Almost as quiet as himself. The fact that he heard his footsteps meant the fox wanted him to know that he was there. Kind as always, he thought, slowly sitting up and lowering his gaze from the ceiling to Kurama’s face once he opened his eyes. Though the fox stood close to him, only centimeters of space between them, he didn’t reach out. Hiei stared at him quietly then closed his eyes, lowering his head.

“You can touch.”

Without hesitation, Kurama’s touch was given. Light as his hands rested on the sides of Hiei’s legs. “No matter what you’re going through, I’m still going to be here,” he muttered softly and Hiei felt his heart clench.

He didn’t deserve this man. Kurama deserved a partner that wouldn’t fall apart over ghosts of the past and could give him peace in his own home instead of moody silence. And yet he didn’t want to let him go, looking up into green eyes with his brows furrowed, trying to think of the words to make him understand.

Please don’t let me go.

“I’m broken, Kurama.”

One of the fox’s hands lifted, hesitating before lithe fingers gently ran along the side of Hiei’s face, brushing lightly over his skin and faded scars that he could remember like the back of his hand.

“Broken beings have to stay together and put each other together again,” Kurama said, and Hiei glanced up at him with wide eyes. "I know you didn't ask for this.."

He leant into the touch, brushing his nose and lips against Kurama’s palm with a soft sigh. Pressing soft kisses to Kurama’s fingers, nuzzling his face against his palm as he sought comfort in his presence. The weight in his chest gradually lifted and he raised a hand to cup the back of the fox’s, pressing his cheek against his palm.

“You’re the good in me,” he said, looking up at him with a faint smile.

In the still and quiet of their kitchen, where the world outside was muted and further away, it was easier to focus on the sound of their breathing and the sweetness in Kurama’s words. The warmth of his palm, Hiei pressed his cheek against it to chase away the cold in his chest and the fox didn’t deny him. Kurama’s other hand laid on his thigh, traveling to his side, the warmth of his palm leaving a trail of heat where it touched. He leant closer and the green of his eyes reminded Hiei of what he loved about the Makai. Vast woodlands, a world untouched by man, with limitless ground to run and explore. And yet those were Kurama ’s eyes and he found another reason to adore them.

Just as quickly as they could be frigid, reminding him of early Spring, when flowers were yet to bloom. The anticipation for the color, the sign of life, the sign of care and continuance giving the entire world pause. And then they would brighten and warm and it was as if everything came to life in Kurama’s eyes. It was as if Hiei could see himself come to life in Kurama’s eyes. Close enough that their noses bumped then brushed together, looking eye to eye, the fox’s lips curved into a smile that warmed his eyes. Hiei’s heart hammered and he wondered if Kurama could hear it.

Could he feel it as his fingers ran up Hiei’s side, brushing over faded scars and newer ones healed by the fox’s plants, lingering over his heart where his palm laid against his skin. Hiei glanced down at his lips before meeting his eyes and Kurama smiled, brushing his fingers over the curve of Hiei’s ear.

He wasn’t sure who had leant in first. Whether he had tilted his head or Kurama had moved forward, but just as with everything, they worked together. And Hiei could never argue with the results. Kurama’s lips were soft and Hiei’s head felt light, the scent of roses and the light-hearted feeling easing the tension in his body. Leaning into the kiss, his fingers twitched and he opened his hands, reaching out to wrap his arms around Kurama’s middle, pressing to bring him closer.

“And I will always see you as the light in me,” Kurama muttered once their lips parted enough for him to speak, and though Hiei’s eyes were still closed, he knew that the fox was smiling.

One of his hands trailing up his back, winding red curls around his fingertips, he smiled wearily and brushed their lips together.

“You’re not alone anymore.”

Hiei paused and his eyes slowly opened. Kurama pulling away, his eyes bright and smile soft, stealing Hiei’s breath away.

“Neither are you,” he finally said once he remembered to breathe. “Even if I’m… going through this , I’m here for you.”

Kurama’s palm ran down the side of Hiei’s face, his thumb running along his jaw, eyes half-lidded. “I know you are,” he said with a nod.

Hiei sighed, mumbling distractedly. “You’re making it hard to think.”

“I’d rather have that then you being lost in your own head,” Kurama teased.

Hiei huffed a laugh, rolling his eyes. “So would I.”

#kurahi #fictober19 #fictober2019 #kurama x hiei #yyh #my fanfiction

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