#he just can't believe it

[silver-strings-of-fate]

"What am I supposed to think of you, Ren? You're as infuriating as you are captivating, magnetic and destructive. You have everything and you take it for granted, like it's so easy for you, like you could just breathe and the entire world would fall at your feet. I hate that I'm not immune, that I want so badly to be special to you. You need nothing from me, yet you're the only one who's ever wanted me. I do not understand it. I wish I was you. I wish you loved me in any sense of the word. I wish I knew how to be myself around you, because I want you to be okay with who I am more than anything, even when you make me wish I could be something different from what I am. I want you to see me and love me anyway, even if there's nothing there to see. But at the same time, I hate how you consume me, how you make yourself more important than everything I've worked for, how you ruin me, and how you make it all feel okay because you look at me like I'm just as important to you as you are to me. Nevermind that that's impossible."

On anon, tell my muse what yours thinks of them

--

Ren's breath caught in his throat as he looked over the message. Did someone really think all of this about him?

"I... It's not easy for me, you know. Nothing is. I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong idea." He rubbed the back of his neck. He didn't know what else to say. How could he? The message just didn't gel with his worldview.

People didn't love him. They couldn't. They might become attached to one of his masks, but there was nothing underneath for anyone to truly love. It was impossible. And yet... Something about the message felt like it was reaching beneath those masks, like it really understood him. Could it really be? Was it possible? But who...?

"I don't know who you are, but... I know for sure that you're just as important to me as I am to you, if not more. Thank you, thank you so much."

#Getting Out There (amamiya ren) #subconscious mental block keeping him from realizing who this is even though it's kinda obvious #he just can't believe it

[mingyusbinch]

REST IN PEACE, DEAR MOONBIN (1998-2023)

#moonbin #astro #moon bin #i don't want to be here right now honestly i just wanted my last post about moonbin to be the ones where hes smiling as my last memory #it kills me to see my posts reblogged with sad messages now #and i still can't believe this news either #i've been mia anyway but now im even less inclined to go on tumblr rn #im so sorry for everyone including family/friends of bin #and himself but i cant think about that bc it will break me apart #rest in peace bin i'll miss you more than anything

[thepunchingbag]

right in the motherfucking feels

#playing as astarion has fucking paid off #karlach actually is able to tell him she's proud of him #right in the motherfucking feels #ngl gonna headcanon him hearing this from karlach (who he's romancing) is just... it means a lot to him #he doesn't believe her really and he doubts he did the right thing #he's still afraid #but having someone who is PROUD of him? #someone who sees good qualities in him? #he just... can't believe it #karlach cliffgate #astarion ancunin #astarion x karlach #astarion #karlach #jaheira #astarion playthrough

[rennenaway]

I mean

I'm not wrong?

#francis mosses #thats not my neighbor #tnmn #Kisses for all the artists who draw him as the pathetic middle aged guy he is #Mwah mwah #But like i see this so often #It's mainly the Doppelgänger fanarts who are like crazy yandere-fied #Which idm they're supposed to be that way i think #But like there's so much fanfic with this guy being the absolutes 'alpha male' ever #Which is so funny cause look at him #He just wants to sleep #Also can't believe that these shitposts do better than my actual art

[inkskinned]

it is totally okay to be hurt and tired and fed up with the american schooling system but i need you to understand that we need to be better about loudly and routinely defending public education.

yes, many teachers suck, many schools utterly suck. i also got bullied and was absolutely not given the right support for my needs. i am not defending public education because it was kind to me. i am defending it because it needs to exist.

right-wing republicans do not want an educated population. they want kids to be homeschooled or in private school. there is a huge religious undertone to this.

the most common argument is that despite high costs, the "result" is not "good" enough. they point to failing schools as proof that public education is just never going to work out. there will be arguments made here that you actually agree with: that teachers can be bullies, that we taught online for 2 years and still charged the same amount of tuition, that we have no recourse for students to actually have agency or a voice, and that schools are now unsafe for kids due to risk of illness and gun violence.

these are all placing the blame in a fraudulent way, one intended to get your parents to homeschool you. the less kids in a school, the less federally-awarded funding for that school, the less any school succeeds. they will not mention the fact it is their legislation that takes away important funding opportunities, that teachers are living at or below the poverty line, that buildings are not kept up to code, that administration is overpaid and forces specific curriculums, that corporations like (my personal enemy) Pearson Education control certain classroom goals because teachers can't afford other options. they pretend to be ignorant of the gun violence and say "oh just get a gun" - but these are the same people who will be sending their child to a private school with a bulletproof backpack. they don't care if your kid dies, though. they "don't believe" in covid, but they did get their kid vaccinated, because of course they did.

it is a closed loop. conservative parents hear the fearmongering and remove children from the system. frequently these parents are also deeply religious. the kids are raised without access to other media & learn to parrot their parents. you have now created a new generation of conservatives. additionally, one of the parents/caregivers must stay home and homeschool the children, usually for free. i will give you 1 guess which parent tends to stay home to homeschool the children. these parents are encouraged to have many, many children. those children are most likely not getting access to safe sex ed.

we might laugh at fox news suggesting teachers are forcing children to use kitty litter but: first of all, there is kitty litter in the classroom. it's part of an emergency kit in case children are locked in due to a shooter. so that's fucking dystopian, and the fact they've completely reimagined the scenario to somehow make the teachers look bad when it's instead a fucking huge symbol of our failure as a country to protect our children.... it feels a little intentional.

secondly: don't just dismiss the situation. because, yeah, obviously, no teacher is encouraging kids to be a catboy. but the actual undertone that fox news is trying to sew is an outright distrust of teachers and of public education. they rely on the dehumanization of trans people as a common touchstone to hide the fact they're pushing two agendas at once. (which is ironic. because the thing they accuse teachers of. is pushing. an agenda.)

whenever someone tells you they want you to read less, you should be suspicious of that. when someone tries to separate you and your education, you should be suspicious of that. i don't even like incel rhetoric nor would i want my kids exposed to it - but i would not take away my child's (age-appropriate) access to the internet. i would just provide more educational materials, not less. the difference here is that i believe we can resolve ignorance with knowledge; whereas conservatives believe that ignorance is bliss.

they misappropriate funding and demonize teachers. they pull the same trick each time - the same thing we are seeing with anti-trans rhetoric. they do not want you to have access to safe sex ed, so they act horrified, claim sex ed teaches you how to thrust deep, claim that we have no idea what "age-appropriate" means. since the mid-nineties, the united states has spent at least 2 billion dollars on abstinence-only education, even though to quote the above link: "a preponderance of studies has found no effect of abstinence education at reducing adolescent pregnancy". conservatives want you to think less of any person struggling with addiction so they can continue their racist "war on drugs", so they spend up to $750 million dollars a year on the DARE program which has absolutely no effect. acting like teachers "must" be "grooming" children is just the same thing - so they can demand that funding either goes to their causes or the funding doesn't "exist" ("i'm not paying for our kids to learn that thing!")

and they want you to feel uncaring about this. they are aware that you will hate some parts of your school experience. pretty much everyone does. they want to lean into the parts that you hate so that you don't put up a fight about it when they take it away for not being "good enough."

i know i maybe sound like a conspiracy theorist. but truly. truly. it is beneficial for conservatives to reduce your faith in the american public schooling system.

one of the explicitly stated campaign promises of the conservative party: to axe the Department of Education in 2024.

i know we are all tired and burnt out and there is so much else wrong with their entire platform. but maybe just - pay attention to this one.

#i can't believe i have to say this #the conservative party is legit like ''is it anything good? okay we hate it.'' #''lets kill lgbt people and ummmmm school children shouldnt be able to read they should be at home watching jordan peterson :)" #the fact that it's like all related is. wild. #like it's wild bc if u start being like. actually making it impossible to afford housing is part of how they keep the nuclear family..... #it's just like lines connecting to lines. EXCEPT ITS OBVIOUS? #what's wild to me about most conspiracy theorists is that they're like . ohhhh the govt is hiding shit!!!!!!! they don't want u to know!!! #and im like. this old man literally got up on stage and said he hates public education and will let our kids die before taking away ak-47s #and ppl are like: lol thats just bob's sense of humor he didn't mean it literally uwu

[floccinaucinihilipilificationa]

#sherlock #it might be the cough medicine but I'm really feeling the bbc sherlock wedding episode today #a good feeling ₍՞◌′ᵕ‵ू◌₎♡ #like finding an old block of cheese in the back of the fridge you forgot about and its gotten super hard and chewy #i currently have half a block of gouda curating in the vegetable cupboard #waiting #how are you doing friends!! C: #I'm good! I still have the cough but I also got a new scarf #I'm still thinking about buying window colors as well but I am waiting if that is also just because of the cough medicine #I can't believe it's already been a year since I have moved! last year I was doing everything here for the first time #and now everything is happening for a second time! that year was both very long and also happened very fast #our floor in the “office” my father wanted to install still is not completly done but he threw up last time he tried #he did not threw up because of the floor but because every time he does a home renovation project he drinks 3 liters of Cherry Coca Cola #we are trying to not make him drink 3 liters of Cherry Coca Cola but he doesn't want anyone else to finish the floor I think so we just do #not mention the hole in the floor #have a nice autumn day friends!! I hope you're doing well! ( ´͈ ◡ `͈ ) #♥

[undertheredhood]

bruce 'tired single dad' wayne: *lecturing jason once again on something he did during a fight*

jason 'theatre kid extraodinare'' todd who immediately starts fake crying on the spot: do you just not love me anymore?

#dc comics #dc universe #dcu #batman #red hood #batfamily #batfam #bruce wayne #bruce thomas wayne #jason todd #jason peter todd #jason was never the angry robin #yeah bruce is weak to his children crying but especially jason #if jason can puke on command you best believe he can convincingly fake cry too #what's the point of having trauma if you can't use it to stop your dad from lecturing you? #bruce folds on the spot when jason cries which is why jason doesn't cry that often (jason doesn't want his secret weapon to lose effect) #most of the time jason just owns up to the things he did #so there really isn't any point in lecturing him because jason doesn't care about consequences #the first time jason fake cried in front of bruce after his death he was shocked at how it still worked #the reason why it works so well is because bruce thought jason was dead for around four years and grieved him for so long

[minecraft-sideblog-tm]

Love that Grian has decided now is the time to use digging straight down as a mining strat, post-1.19 where it's pretty easy to dig into a huge cavern and then fall 80 blocks to the ground, or survive the fall but be surrounded by mobs, or fall onto an patch of dripstone, or fall into a MASSIVE lava lake, or land in an ancient city/deep dark biome, or-

#I can't actually think of any other deathtraps but ending with ''or-" just sounded funnier #i do understand his logic tbh like he's got a point #it's just so funny thinking of how many more hazards there are now lol #godspeed grian I believe in you anyway #grian #hermitcraft 10 #hermitcraft #lee speaks

[ryllen]

I was just THINKING OF HOW ANNOYING Sebek is, H O N E S T .

#and something just FLIPPED in me fshdsh I JUST LOVE SHIP DYNAMIC WHERE BOTH ENDS CAN JUST YELL AT EACH OTHER NONSTOP FHSDHSD IT'S TOO FUN tO #DRAW and then EVERYTHING JUST WENT SO FAST AFTER THAT FHSHSDHS just when she said she was gonna be a spectator only fssh gomen everyone fhs #twisted wonderland #twst #sebek zigvolt #twst yuu #twst mc #malleus draconia #deuce spade #twst grim #ace trappola #mozus trein #fanart #glorious masquerade #FSDHS I EVEN CONSIDERED SEBEK THE MOST UNPOPULAR ONE FROM EVERY BOIS ON TWST FSHDSDH #AND HERE I AM BECAUSE HE FITS MY YUU IF HE JJUST SNAPPED OUT HIS MALLEUS OBSESSION FOR JUST A LITTLE BIT #I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW FUN THIS IS TO DRAW FHSDHSD #I am not kidding WHEN SEBEK IS ASSIGNED AS MANDATORY PARTNER ON MATERIAL BATTLE #i was like N O HE IS SO UNPOPULAR NO ONE IS SETTING HIM AS MAIN FHSDH #I'M DYING #WHY DID I END UP WITH SEBEK #FSHDSHD #THE UNPOPULAR ONE is just TOO FUN TO MESS UP SOMETIMES #BUT SERIOUSLY #HOW DARE HE KEEPS SAYING HUMAN THIS HUMAN THAT IT'S PUSHING MY NERVE THIS GUY FFHSD HDSDSJ #in waht way is he evil #HE IS JUST ABSOLUTELY HIGH IS ALL #STOP HIM FSHD #HE IS EVEN WORSE THAN IDIA IN TERM OF OTAKUNESS FSJDSHDHS

[mobius-m-mobius]

OWEN WILSON and TOM HIDDLESTON behind the scenes of LOKI S2

#owen wilson #tom hiddleston #lokius #loki #mcuedit #lokiedit #marveledit #loki spoilers #if owen didn't already have my heart the fist bump fakeout would've sealed the deal lmao #god he's so 🥺🥺 #and the two of them truly have the most incredible chemistry i'll ever see?? can't believe how lucky we were to have experienced this show #love how the universe saw i needed thanksgiving plans and dropped the assembled ep a week early so just another reason to love life 🙏🥰 #loki s2 spoilers #marvel #owenwilsonedit #dianagifs

[egophiliac]

more masquerade stuff! things really went from 0 to 1000 in, like, thirty seconds.

(sorry if none of these make sense outside of my head)

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #glorious masquerade #seriously though why was everyone SO into trein's makeout story #anyway i know this event is chronologically ambiguous but i can't help but read a bunch of episode 7 foreshadowing into it #i want to see more of malleus losing his goshdang gourd #he marked his calendar! he did research and made special plans for his fun trip! #he wanted to sit next to his human and watch a show and make fireworks! #who even cares about the world-ending stakes they RUINED HIS VACATION #god. i can't believe you can literally tell him to just chill. #why did they even bother including another dialogue option. who would choose anything else. #malleus is going to overblot and turn into a huge inky dragon or something #and yuu is going to open their mouth and say something so incredibly stupid that malleus is immediately shocked back into sanity #tsunotarou be cool

[courtmartialme]

woag .. otp

#fma #royai #riza hawkeye #roy mustang #talking to user chrysopoeias reminded me of this doodle i posted on twitter ages ago #im too dumb to make analysis textposts with my opinions so you get (checks notes) royai experiencing post nut clarity #about how funny i think it is that riza bases all her self value into how useful she is or isn't being #while roy is like wow.. i love riza can't believe she still by my side after all i've done .. #in the hospital scene after the lust fight where roy is scolding her there's a part he says he's going to keep trusting her with his back #and she looks genuinely surprised as if she really expected him to just throw her out because she failed and lost her utility #when he's mostly angry because riza gave up on life so easily and he doesn't want her to die. he can't live in a world without her #riza babe ur so mentally ill <3

[beif0ngs]

Buggy the Clown || Anime vs. Live Action comparison shots 

#One Piece #opgraphics #One Piece Live Action #Buggy #Buggy the Clown #OPLA #oplaedit #Jeff Ward #*mine #good on 'em for keeping this iconic scene in lmao #but didn't care for how they changed it to Luffy having the idea to separate and lock up Buggy's body parts #when it was actually Nami who thought of the idea in the manga #like she STOLE and tied up Buggy's body parts like the THIEF that she is #why tf would they change that sheesh 🙄 #ANYWAY i can't believe that the OPLA turned Buggy into the most celebrated and hated character here on this hellsite #i mean i need y'all to know that he is really just a dumb pathetic loser clown whose true strength lies in riding off others' coattails #and while i'm still not a fan of the live action i did surprisingly enjoy Jeff Ward's performance as Buggy

[lazylittledragon]

thinking about modern vampires who aren't suspicious bc they're just the local goth couple

#art #doodle #comic #the damsons #they're both queer obvs #they can't sit right #also i believe that if you're going to make a m/f goth couple #he should be wearing JUST AS MUCH MAKEUP AS HER #if not more #it's only fair #also hi i'm still alive i just went to a festival and my brain has been reset

[ultipoter]

This man is going to need an abacus to count all the abacus I'll gift him on our countless upcoming dates

#volo #ウォロ #pokemon #pmex #my brain is scrampled egg I can't believe he's coming out on the mobile game tomorrow #Content for the boy?? he has a voice?? he's dateable?? sorta at least #i'm just so happy ksdhgs #been funky couple of days #mine #fanart

[jellybuttons]

Crowley's "oh" moment wasn't him realizing that he's in love

Okay so we've all talked about the scene where Nina asks Crowley if Aziraphale is his "bit on the side" or whatever and Crowley has that visable fanfiction "oh" moment on his face afterwards. And I know a lot of people think it must have been Crowley realizing that he was in love with Aziraphale, but that's never sat right with me. Crowley is emotionally repressed and oblivious, sure, but he's been down bad for that angel since the beginning. I just can't believe he didn't know it the whole time. That can't have been what he was reacting to. Hell, just the nervous swallow he does at the beginning of that conversation implies that he knows exactly what Nina is about to ask him, meaning he at least already has that idea in his head.

I think what he was reacting to was Nina's last comment, "other people's love lives always seem so much more straightforward than our own" (I'm quoting from memory but I got the gist of it).

Crowley has been in love for a long time by this point. He's also, for that entire time, understood that nothing can be done about it. Up until Armageddon failed, there was no universe where Crowley and Aziraphale could safely be together, and Crowley cares too much about Aziraphale to truly risk his safety (although he does have his selfish moments--that need to know that Aziraphale cares for him too, that he's not completely alone in this partnership). Nothing could change, so there was no point in doing anything about it.

In the few years post Armageddon, though, it seems like QUITE a bit has changed for the two of them. Remember, these are two immortal beings...a few years is milliseconds to them. But in those milliseconds, it seems like Crowley has become a regular establishment in the bookshop, glasses off and all. Aziraphale felt comfortable enough with him to ask to borrow the Bentley, Crowley's prized possession and his literal home. They've gotten COMFY in a very short amount of time, objectively, and I'm sure it felt like big change to Crowley, who knows better than to ask for things he doesn't think he can have.

But Nina's comment. "Other people's love lives always seem so much more straightforward than our own". A direct parallel to exactly how Crowley has been thinking about her and Maggie this whole time--two people who just need a push (romantic awning, anyone?) and everything else would fall into place. Easy. Uncomplicated.

Crowley's "oh" moment isn't that he's in love with Aziraphale. It's that maybe being in love with Aziraphale doesn't have to be complicated.

Other people's love lives DO seem more straightforward than Crowley's own. But if Nina feels that way about him, as sure as he is about her and Maggie...could it be that easy? Could he have that with his angel? I don't think at this point that Crowley has any doubt about whether or not Aziraphale feels something for him (whatever that something may be in Crowley's mind), but after all...Aziraphale asked him to slow down. So he's been taking it slow. Hanging around more. Leaning into his space. Soaking up every second of Az's smiles like a dying man, content with whatever he's given.

But Nina. She thinks they're together already. No doubt in her mind. She thinks it's so straightforward, that of COURSE they're together, two people who look at each other with that much love in their eyes must be, right? And I think that "oh" is Crowley's realization that maybe it IS straightforward. After all, they're them, right? No more Heaven, no more Hell, no actual reason they couldn't just...be together. In that moment, Crowley isn't realizing that he's in love with Aziraphale. He's known he's in love for a very long time. No, that moment was him realizing that, maybe, he can stop pretending not to be, that maybe all they have to do is stop pretending they aren't everything to each other. Does he need to slow down if there's no danger to avoid?

When Nina and Maggie confront him at the end, encourage him to confess...objectively, I don't think Crowley as a character would agree to anything nearly that vulnerable without a LOT more convincing. But he does agree. And you could argue that it's because of Gabe and Beez, sure, but when has Crowley ever used other angels and demons as reasoning behind his choices? No, consistently, Crowley has followed humans every time. Gabe and Beez are nothing but conveniently timed examples. I think that even without G and B running off together, Nina and Maggie could've convinced him after nothing but this "oh" conversation with Nina.

When Crowley is choking out his confession in the final 15 of episode 6, so desperate to make Aziraphale understand...he says "we're a pair, a group, a group of the two of us, and we've spent our existence pretending that we aren't". That's the point he's trying to get across. They can stop pretending, they can stop pretending, please, god, stay here Aziraphale and don't make him keep pretending.

Please, Aziraphale, he's saying. Don't go back. I only just realized that it doesn't have to be complicated. He realized that, maybe, finally, he was allowed.

Oh, he thought, out there on the sidewalk with Nina, there's nothing left but me stopping me from being happy.

Oh, he thought, while Nina and Maggie urged him to communicate, the couple that so perfectly mirrored his own wants, I could tell him how I feel.

Oh, he thought, as Aziraphale looked at him with excited eyes and explained that he wanted them both to go back to Heaven, that Crowley could become an angel again, that they could go right back to working for the very thing that had been keeping them apart for thousands of years. Oh, oh god. I thought it was over. I thought we were free. I thought that, finally, maybe, it could be easy. Maybe we can stop pretending.

And he kissed him. Because fuck, just like with Nina and Maggie, he thought it could finally be easy, but then communicating didn't work and nothing was easy and all he had left was one fabulous kiss and vavoom and he was desperate and off script and so, so scared and then he was alone in the Bentley, driving away from the bookshop, completely alone.

Maybe Crowley should've kept pretending. It would've hurt less.

#im so obsessed with this moment i just can't believe that crowley makes sense if he doesn't know he's in love #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #ineffable husbands #gomens #crowley x aziraphale #aziracrow #neil gaiman