#humans are so fascinating and i find myself the most interesting. bcs it's Me!!

[tangled-shoelace]

Barely coherent spawn ramblings about his relationships from the eyes of an aroace person

My brain is oatmeal and I suuuck at expressing things but I desperately want to talk about Spawn because he’s my all time favourite character any media has ever produced. These are things I’ve observed solely from the show and sparse lore reading because I have not read any comics yet lol. I’m getting the first 5 soon though so yay yippie!

Note: I only included the fact I’m aroace because I feel that seeing his relationships unfold through that kind of perspective has made it far more interesting for me to think about. I’m a lot more analytical of relationships like this, and I find myself appreciating them in a way that’s different than most people. I guarantee this will be me mostly gushing :3c

Spawn is such a fascinating guy when it comes to developing friendships. I am partly aware that this is bc of the whole female love interest thing, but I’ve been thinking about it a lot. The main message this show tries to get across is that Spawn is a creature who ruins the lives of those he wants to get close to, but he still tries nonetheless. It’s a deep, primal desire for closeness, even in his worst moments. It’s the most tragic part of him. He believes he needs to earn his humanity back, but in reality, his humanity was there the whole time. He just didn’t really know it, whether it be because he was being suffocated by nightmares or believing he was a monster for the things he was doing. Which is partially true. I’d love to touch more on his monstrous portrayal musically and visually sometime

The scene where Wanda saw him for the first time shattered my heart. Seriously. Her screams of fear were muffled, as he reached out to her and spoke her name. He couldn’t hear it. He didn’t want to hear it. Until finally we hear a loud, clear scream of sheer terror, followed by spawn crying out her name as she drives off. He finally realised she doesn’t recognise him, her husband, and that she’s horrified by him and his actions as a monster. He did whatever he possibly could to get close to her, even through very questionable actions, trying to escape the inexorable reality that he can’t be with her. Not with the way he is now. Any chance of a relationship with her is long gone, but he refuses to accept it.

He fears closeness, but he yearns for it you know? With his deteriorating mental state, it wouldn’t be hard to believe that he genuinely doesn’t know how to process his feelings to develop stable relationships. I sure wouldn’t if I was being haunted by intense nightmares and constant misery. He’s just drawn to anyone who shows him kindness, someone who can make him forget the pain. It’s a humanly desire. His sliver of humanity. A character like Jade is more than a love interest. To me, she wasn’t really one to begin with. It’s genuinely hard for me to describe. The kiss scene is one of my all time favourites. His nervous breathing and hesitation to let her hold him made me kind of teary eyed.

This isn’t me trying to woobify spawn I promise. There’s a difference in that and simply appreciating his more emotionally messy side. He’s genuinely a wreck and I enjoy it. So sorry if this is barely cohesive </3 I promise I’m not a total idiot I just have a hard time putting my thoughts into words. Spawn makes me emotional

#basically spawn is the poorest meow meow #i genuinely can’t stress enough how amazingly complex his character is #spawn #todd mcfarlane's spawn #spawn show #rambling #aroace #i promise I’m only partially incompetent #i hope someone sees my vision

[vedurnan]

Do you have any recommendations of books or other resources for people to learn more about religion as you describe? It sounds really cool

ok honestly, i would not describe myself as someone who knows much about religion at all, it's kind of just like a hobby to me, but i can tell u what i like to look at and what has informed my own awareness of religion... which i am certain is really amateurish and almost totally focused on western christianity. but this is what i like:

i really like bart ehrman who is this scholar of early christianity and the new testament, he's an atheist but he used to be like a liberal christian and fell out of it bc of the problem of evil. he has a perspective i really enjoy where he seems to be just fascinated by early christianity and to enjoy talking about it. i was introduced to him thru his lecture series "how jesus became god" on the great courses and i love love love his podcast "misquoting jesus" where he talks about a different topic relating to early christianity or the bible every week. just a really pleasing secular scholarly look at some very interesting shit imo! love bart. he also has a bunch of books which i wish to read at some point but have never touched

i also enjoy this youtube channel "ready to harvest" that makes these like lecture videos about various christian denominations and their beliefs and practices and histories. i think the guy who runs it is like a baptist academic of some kind which is wack imo but he seems to really make an effort to represent every denomination on their own terms and i find his videos endlessly fascinating. i think i've learned more about the history of christian denominations in america especially from watching those videos than from anything else

when it comes to actual religious literature i really like thomas merton especially his book "new seeds of contemplation" but there is such a wealth of merton writing i haven't even touched. his writing is the first time i've heard a christian talk about their own experience of god in a way that i found meaningful to my own life. he articulates a lot of things that are almost impossible to discuss in words and i find his writing really beautiful. i've also read like a scattering of much older christian stuff like meister eckhart or the sayings of the desert fathers and a lot of that stuff is cool but a lot is also totally strange or disagreeable to me, i think it's more like poetry to me

i've been loving reading "the heart of the buddha's teaching" by thich nhat hanh, it's such a sweetly written book and such a pleasing introduction to buddhist thought. there are a lot of passages from that book that i think back to on a daily basis when i'm navigating thru life. i think buddhism is the religion that i find most true to the nature of my reality and most relevant to my own human life but i'm way less knowledgeable about it than christianity because i find christianity so vivid and strange and fascinating i can't look away

[kociepierogi]

Hello! I’m your LOST secret Santa! Could you tell me about your favourite character and why you like them?

Thanks!

Hi, I'm sorry for late reply but I'm out on a trip rn!!

So, I could say that I have three fav characters; Sayid, Mr Eko and Ben.

I like Sayid bcs he's both so perfect and imperfect. He's literally the most beautiful man on the whole island who respects women and always has right opinions (let's ignore his past, okay 🤪). What is fascinating for me in his character, that I can very easily read him from his face and body language and as an autistic person, most of the time I find it incredibly hard. (Maybe it's time to slap another autism headcanon on my fav character 😆).

He's beautifully soft, caring and emotional, very intelligent and knows his shit about things. I very much have instinct to protect this man at all cost, though I know it would probably be the other way around 😆😆😆

I also very often find it fascinating when a character has a dark past although clearly being a good person and still struggling with some horrible stuff (let's ignore what they did to him in season 5/6 😭😭😭). It's like... the nuance, mixed emotions and lots of space to do some tasty psychoanalysis 👁👁 In the end, we see what his character is about and it's very much about how sOFT and caring he is to people he loves, he just wants to protect them ;u; But he was forced by war to go to extreme measures to survive and he is stuck with this survival mode and trauma for a long time, as people with pstd are.

He's a lovely friend, partner and ally to have and I like to headcanon him to be on the ace spectrum, like demisexual and biromantic (just my personal little headcanon 🤭). Idk, he's just neat 🤲💖

When it comes to Ben, I love how horrible he is, it fascinates me without the end 😆😆 He's clearly someone who has ptsd and might be autistic with some absolutely horrible coping mechanisms and jealousy problems. He's pathetic in a way that makes me hooked, whenever we find some humanity behind all of that and someone yET again gives him another chance (as they usually shouldn't, but I would do the same because I am delulu). The part in the finale in afterlife, when he was in this ridiculously adorable teachers AU with Locke made me love him even more, bcs it showed what kind of person he could be, if all of this bad stuff with island wouldn't happen. I love to headcanon him as autistic and gay aroace or asexual gay or just gay. He clearly would have many little passions if he wouldn't be occupied with the island bullshit and his ptsd. He's clearly a father at his very core, the one that is not rotten with fear and jealousy. He seems to just care sm for others in this AU. (And he clearly would have some interesting close friendship with Locke with nice sprinkle of gayness 👀)

Normally he's a horrible person with tragic story but I am a Benjamin Linus apologist 100%, love that he got his little redemption arc at the end and got domesticated by Hurley 😆 He might as well get it after all this mess and trauma with island and Jacob vs Black Smoke bullshit, like wHY not

The third option is Mr Eko and his incredibly relatable struggle with religion. Again, another character that I headcanon as autistic, like VERY much. The way he perceives world and communicates 🤌 I'm always weak for character whose stories are about survival, trauma and like in this case, religious trauma. Even though myself I came out in the end to be agnostic, I admire his strength to stay spiritual and become a priest. He's someone who's strong and someone to look up to for advice. Though, he shouldn't have to be forced to be so strong by awful trauma he went through.

I absolutely LOVED the way he perceived his spirituality and concept of sin. The way he said he asks for no forgiveness, because he only did what he did to survive. And that struck me, I was like WOAH, THAT'S IT. I am really sad that his character was killed off and we never saw where they would go with it, it would be so sO interesting. A badass priest with awfully dark past 🤌 His attachment to brother is very relatable to me too. And yet again, another aroace headcanon 😆

Anyway, sorry for long ramble, hope that helps a bit!!!

#Lost #Lost spoilers #abc lost #benjamin linus #sayid jarrah #mr eko #lost secret santa #asks

[fereldanwench]

so i finished my rewatch of s1-s3 and new watch of s4-s7 of the 100 aaanddd i wanna ramble

spoilers and, from what i've gathered, unpopular opinions under the cut lmao

i watched the first three seasons in 2015-16, iirc (binged s1 and s2 on netflix; watched s3 as it aired)--i remember losing interest towards the end of s3 so i wasn't super hyped about s4 and just kinda forgot about it. on rewatch, i was also getting bored with s3, lmao. it starts off pretty strong, and the end revelation is a banger, but the last 4 eps or so just draaaggggg

i really liked seasons 4 and 5, though, with one big exception: giving clarke a daughter-figure to go all mama bear over was quite possibly one of the most obnoxious character development choices they could have given her

clarke in general is kind of a frustrating character for me because on one hand, i fuckin love a female character who does awful things for what she believes are good reasons, and that is clarke 100%

but in spite of that awesome set up, she manages to be so fucking boring

i think a lot of it is the actress' performance, tbh--the acting on the show overall generally isn't anything spectacular, but i find her particularly bad. i cant quite pinpoint my gripes, i just find her very bland

and given that the show is basically one extended trolley problem and there are dozens of characters who are also constantly put in the position of making the most difficult decisions in the universe, that just isn't enough to make her compelling

i found myself really drawn to echo in the later seasons because i am predictable af and i love a character who is loyal to a fault and bases their entire identity off being a loyal follower. i do feel like the relationship with bellamy was a little shoehorned, though. like i see the enemies to lovers potential there, but i think having most of that transition happen off-screen took all the fun from it

and i was stunned when i went looking for echo gifs to find out that most people hate her but love clarke apparently, lmao. hard opposite

s5 also delved into one of my favorite dark apocalypse tropes: what will push people to become cannibals to survive? it's always been a morbid fascination and i wasn't expecting them to get as fucked up with it as they did, but it was compelling shit

s6 had interesting elements to it--the worldbuilding/lore i think is part of the reason i got so sucked into the show, and seeing how becca's influence managed to reach a whole other planet was cool. i also liked the personality chip stuff bc it gave me ideas for valerie, haha. i also liked russel as an antagonist--love a very polite and calm villain being pushed to their limits

but i could see it was starting to lead into a setup for a whole metaphysical aspect to everything that had happened, and i just really don't like that shit

oh, also, kane and abby were my absolute favorite couple and i'm very sad they didn't get their HEA

so s7 was very meh to me. lovedlovedloved echo, dioyza, octavia, and hope getting to be badasses together, but that's about it. the transcendentalist shit was so fucking tedious, and bellamy got done dirty. and i've found myself overly fixated on the logistics of the "finalkru" situation with clarke and her buddies living on earth for the rest of their lives with no hopes of procreation or extending the human race

like at some point there's just gonna be one person remaining, right? and they have to spend their remaining days all alone? unless they do some kind of death pact? or how exactly do the transcendents ensure there are no babies? can the humans undo this? like what if they clone themselves or do in vitro fertilization? i have questions!!!

i don't mind a story ending with unanswered questions--i even really like that sometimes--but ending with a bunch of new unanswered questions is annoying lmao

plus i find the premise of finalkru surviving and maybe trying to figure out a way to continue the human race to be more interesting than 87% of the plot of s7

also two of the big themes throughout the show was never giving up hope and always seeking to rediscover their humanity after doing horrible shit--i just don't feel like this ending really tied those motifs up in a satisfying way. 99.9% of the human population no longer experiencing pain because they basically don't exist anymore feels less like a reward for Good Behavior and more... idk, just unsettling to me.

i mean, it's basically sci-fi rapture, and the whole idea of the rapture always freaked me out too lmao

i know the show is based on books, which i haven't read and don't plan to, so maybe some of this would be better explained there, but i've also seen commentary that it deviates a lot from the novels so who knows

anyway, i do like the show overall. there's a lot of juicy stuff here, but very weak ending. reminded me a bit of how i felt watching lost, actually, although not as egregious

#t: wench watches stuff #shows: the 100

[lucky-draws]

Ocelot is so interesting and tragic and insane because he was essentially raised in and molded for a world that the patriots weren’t so much dedicated to building as much as they believed that a man from such a world would be the perfect spy and ocelot is only able to find affirmation of such a world in the eyes and heart of Big Boss. He’s like an otter in the desert that fell in love with a goldfish in a bowl, the most water he’s ever seen in his life. A goldfish that tells him stories of the sea, a magical wonderful place neither of them have ever actually known.

YEEEAAAAS OMG. your mind your words!!! you're right + that's a very funky way of putting it. food for thought.

and like ocelot's childhood/his molding into shape by the philosophers is so so interesting to think abt honestly....... tragic and insane guy indeed.....

actually on this ive been thinking thoughts abt the philosophers etc bc i recently saw a page from the mgs4 novel on my dash, and like phew. (phew. i have the novel myself + i flicked through it to find the bit rather than dig up the post i saw and my god. what a novel.certainly some sentences in here.) anyway this bit:

the 'my insignificant personality' bit is very interesting and tasty to me....... i guess from childhood he's been raised to be an actor, to play numerous roles, as part of being a spy, and as such is used to sort of burying his true personality very deep, or pushing it aside. repressing it all. and i think...

like i often think of him in relation to bosselot as being like. he's raised to be working for various organisations, to be devoted to the philosophers and their will, and from childhood he's given all these ideas beyond his age about countries and politics and all these faceless organisations or powers, and i think of him as when he finds bb, it's like all that falls away and he suddenly finds someONE who's worth devoting his life, his skills to instead.

and maybe HE thinks of it as being far superior, far more meaningful than being loyal to any country or organisation, because bb is real and alive and smexy (sorry) and fascinating and all the rest of it. however.

i think the sort of tragedy of it is is that while bb might seem like that at the start, this goofy mgs3 eater of raw snakes, what bb becomes is essentially just another faceless concept; he loses his humanity, he becomes obsessed, he's this symbol of war, he IS war, he is a gun as he himself says, and i think it's like ocelot in his own mind is so infatuated that he doesn't see it maybe, or he does but it's too late , and the reality is that his devotion to big boss is hardly any less demeaning, or any less tragic, than devoting his life to the philosophers or to america or russia or whoever. idk. especially if you think of this is in a more canon sense of bosselot i.e. Not requited. because ocelot really does not get anything at all from his devotion.

Which. i guess links or mirrors the boss. Loyalty to the end. she's loyal to her country and gets nothing for it except you know. Exploitation and death. And ocelot is. Loyal to big boss and he THINKS he's on to something good, that bb is far more of a worthy cause than patriotism, but what does he get for it? the same thing really. it's a thankless task and it ends with his whole personality destroyed, except in his final moments, and death at the hands of a knock-off snake. idk.

kgnghfhffhjsk so yeah. well here we are with more bosselot discussion on this fine wednesday. thank u for dropping by!!!!!!! its very true what u say i enjoyed it and unfortunately was motivated to add my own ramblings.peace and love and meow meow meow meow meow miaow miao fucking mrreow on earth!!!!! 🐆

#lisette mumbles #bosselot #ocelot as a martyr .....ocelot's religious devotion ...big boss as a godlike figure .... #(who will therefore never return ocelots love in the same capacity) #things that are also really quite insanity inducing. #ALSO HELP. #at the bottom of that page it also says like.he became liquid snake blah blah.the son of big boss. #and blah blah perhaps that was what hed always wanted:: #to become the son of the warrior who he idolized/was so impressed by . #AND IM LIKE WHATTT!!!!!!! dot jpeg. #so crazy i think in that passage it's big boss sort of telling ocelots tale and my god. #personally in my own opinion i do not thinm ocelot wanted to be your son #HOWEVER THOUGH LIKE #ocelot if yiu remove bosselot romance idea is just ewually fascinating #like it's just as crazy and tragic if u explore them being brothers ish like the sons of the boss thing properly idk . #it's really quite a lot #anyway .time to be normal again #👋 #wrote this not long after breakfast so sorry if its full of post breakfast inchorencies #top secret documents

[clarenecessities]

ummmm what about. uhhh those women from the supergirl show. now that i type that im pretty sure one of them is supergirl

oh, buddy. yes, one of them is supergirl.

disclaimer: i have never and will never watch the cw's supergirl, bc i love myself

What made you ship it?

well it TURNS OUT that there's a lot of overlap in Supercorp shippers and Catradora shippers, for some reason. can't imagine why! [puts a blanket over my venn diagram's cage]

so i went a little insane after she-ra came out (you remember) and read about 6k fics, just scrolling through the tag with some filters on & clicking on anything that looked interesting. it was a very interesting time in our lives. a lot of me going "huh? whah?" in call. birth of the scorpia disclaimer.

but eventually i ran out of she-ra fics. and i like... i couldn't stop, you know? and it turns out that some of the best she-ra authors have written a lot of supergirl fics. so it kept coming up when i was on author-specific binges. and i got curious! i'm a curious guy!

and then it turns out they're really cute >:( they're adorable, damn it.

ik i'm never gonna be able to drag you into this hole with me, since you already have a designated CW trainwreck, but if you're ever feeling bored the first one i ever read was really fucking funny and requires zero knowledge of canon. i didn't know alex's pronouns until halfway through bc i'd never heard of her (literally supergirl's sister). initially i clicked on it bc "superhero pretends to date her civilian identity" sounded hysterical but like... kara is so sweet, and so socially inept. and lena is a human disaster who just wants to help. and they both have crippling abandonment issues and no chill whatsoever

What are your favorite things about the ship?

i like that they appreciate each other. the version of them that i've constructed piecemeal from other people's opinions is such that like... they've both been pretty miserable, right? lena watched her mom die when she was like 4 years old and then got adopted by the luthors, kara watched her planet explode & pawned off by clark (who was like 30 years older than he was supposed to be bc of DC bullshit) on some human family and had to pretend to be normal for a decade or so.

and they both hide that pretty well, kara with kindness and lena with unapproachable businesswoman...ness... but they're both immediately fascinated by each other. and they're both sort of genuine with each other, even when they're in 'nice but bumbling civilian' or 'ruthless luthor' mode. so where it gets interesting for me is those moments they reach a mutual understanding of something, or where they trust each other in spite of Every Other Thing.

in like their first meeting lena says she's just a woman trying to make a name for herself outside of her family & asks if they can understand and kara is like "🥺 yeah..." and like they were just kind of fucked from there. sigh. you don't know how good you have it with riverdale polycule man. fuckin CW.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

i have many but the one that comes up most often isn't an opinion, it's a fact.

“khap zhao rrip” is fucking nonsense. it does not mean 'i love you'. it's SVO instead of VSO and zhao is a noun why are you even including kyrptahniuo if you're just going to find-and-replace random words.

listen. listen to me. zhaoivodh khap rrip. it is literally easier than french. nobody fucking does it right logan it makes me feel insane

#answers #hungry-bug #supergirl

[majormeilani]

8 9 and 12 for the ask meme?

autism ask meme

8. If you have any, what are your special interests?

i have a strong special interest in miniatures as in those really teeny tiny things that look like common objects like chairs or books or cookware. even better if the thing is made of realistic materials or actually functional like these one miniature playing cards i have that are an actual full deck you could quite literally play a card game with. they are actually sooooo cool. i also love dollhouses (esp calico critters bc they're so detailed) and miniature scenes.

i also enjoy dancing and choreography as well as watching people act. performance arts are very fun for me as they are both entertaining to watch and be a part of. i also love to imitate it just for fun.

i also enjoy art and its history as well as the process of game development and story building. reading and writing are also tons of fun for me. media analysis is very fun to me too as i find it fun to both consume a story and break things down about it to analyze and consider different perspectives on and i especially love talking to people about them.

psychology and behavioral studies are also very interesting to me. i love to consider the multiple possibilities of something in accordance to the circumstances that someone finds themselves in and i find human development fascinating. i also loveeeed science as a kid especially animal science and botany but in general i always found everything about it fascinating.

there's more like specific special interests i have but i can't think of them right now…. i know there's definitely media i'm interested in in regards to shows and games too but people usually mean more general things in regards to special interests than say the games that i like or something lol. but i still think they can be considered special interests too :) tho most the time i call those hyperfixations as i have adhd too but tbh they overlap most the time.

9. What was your first special interest?

i want to say probably stuffed animals and maybe cats and hamsters. i had and have many stuffed animals still as i always felt like i needed more little buddies to be my companions with. i also for a time remember being really really obsessed with this pumpkin i got to decorate in kindergarten and i was always writing about it in my little daily journal that they had us do until it unfortunately rotted and i had to throw it away. i remember the little drawings i did of it though with orange crayola markers but sadly i don't know if we have the journals anymore 😔😔

12. Do you headcanon any characters as autistic? If you want, tell us why you headcanon them as autistic.

oh for sure!!!

when it comes to hattytime i believe quite a few of the characters are autistic, namely bow kid, hat kid, snatcher and conductor. they all have a certain vibe to them that gives me the impression that they are. though i'm sure if i thought about it enough, i could most definitely see many of the others as autistic too.

bow and hat also appear to have selective mutism, which is a trait that i share with them myself so i always found that to be the one clue to that. they also appear to both be very analytical about their approach to things and seem to have respective fixations in regards to their manner of dressing, where hat kid seems to like more simple and loose, flowy, comfy clothes and bow kid seems to like more decorated styles of dress and i think that is a part of how they express themselves. not to mention i always saw some of their idle animations as a stim of some kind.

snatcher it's hard to explain exactly but i feel like with how consistent he is in his social interactions and desire to be left alone gives me the impression that he is autistic. he also seems to have a special interest in reading and studying things, even the subcon time rift cluing to a possible interest in science and experimentation. he also seems to share kind of a lack of social understanding especially when he was still the prince and how he's portrayed within the storybook not quite understanding why vanessa was so upset with him. also, the way he has a default stance that he stands in with his hands clasped, something that i often find myself doing too in finding a very comfortable position to be standing in.

conductor i find to be autistic as well just because of his special interests in movies and his train. he also has a similar way of standing in a default way with his hands behind his back or fidgeting constantly as a form of stim. he also seems to struggle a lot in social settings and comes off very direct and blunt and seems to struggle a lot with emotional regulation. it's just very obvious to me that he's autistic. i also think on top of his autism he has a form of ocd too, something that is comorbid with autism.

i think maybe grooves i could argue similarly that he could be autistic too? but i'm not sure because i hadn't really considered it but i'm open to the idea of course ❤️ :) though i mostly considered his to some anxiety disorder or adhd explaining his behavior but i could also see him being a bit autistic .

outside from hattytime tho, i believe max caulfield from life is strange to be autistic. she shares the same traits that i personally do and has a special interest in photography. it's also possible that chloe also is too just by how she interacts with the world and how she had a special interest in science.

when it comes to mgs, i believe naked snake/big boss and the other snakes to all be very autistic. they all seem to have their respective interests and just how they interact with others socially and romantically really gives me the impression that they are. i want to argue possibly that revolver ocelot and some the cobra unit are definitely autistic too. also otacon and the rest of his family for sure given me the impression that they are too.

from toh, i know that i definitely like to think of gus and luz as having autism. luz of course adhd and autism at the same time and gus i think is very much autistic. i don't often have many hcs for the toh characters but just solely based on vibes.

rena ryuugu, rika furude and satoko houjou from higurashi i also believe to be autistic and it's solely based on how their personalities come across and their means of expressing themselves.

i'm sure though if i went through the many other medias that i enjoy and made a list i would be able to point out characters in each one who i believe to be autistic but ough this list has gotten very long as is. thank you so much for asking though!!!!!!! ❤️

#answered asks #anon #THANK YOU¡!!!!!

[theold-ultraviolence]

hi!!!!

so sorry for this super delayed reply - we've been prepping to go on vacation and for getting a new puppy right after vacation, so it's been a little hectic

but omg I am so flattered that you enjoyed my insanely unhinged thoughts about the targaryens and the habsburgs!! 🥹😭 I always fear that I'm too rambly and that my thoughts don't make any sense, so I'm so happy you thought I explained it well bc after I write something out I'm always like "is this the most incoherent thing anyone has ever written?" lmao

and it's so interesting to also look into what you brought up about the archetypical features and how it's all tied together!

re: las meninas - ugh I totally feel you on that! Foucault and I are kind of enemies bc I literally never know what the fuck he's saying. I've read him both in the original French and in the English translation and I just literally do not know what this man is saying. I'm sure he's very smart, but to me, a true gauge of how good a scholar/thinker is hinges on their ability to be able to write in a way that helps everyone to understand their ideas rather than just perpetuating discriminatory academic traditions. but that's a rant for a different day!

and I absolutely agree that while I get why las meninas is important and why people study it, I don't find it to be a particularly compelling painting. if you're interested, the portraits Velazquez did of the court entertainers are very fascinating, although ultimately so tragic. the other half of that paper I wrote (the half that was not about habsburg inbreeding) was about the extent to which Velazquez humanized and dignified these entertainers. the super interesting thing is that a lot of prior scholars have bent over backwards to say that he was ennobling these sitters and showing their humanity, etc., etc. but when you actually look at the images, that's not totally true. interestingly enough, part of the reason people have made this argument is because Velazquez is treated as the "hero" of spanish painting, and therefore he must be faultless and beyond critique. however, that view totally obscures the reality of these portraits and the lives of their subjects. I think scholars now are starting to take a more critical and unbiased view on these images, but it's both fascinating and disturbing how long that narrative has been perpetuated.

to me, the most compelling of these images is The Jester Calabacillas (1637-1639) now in the Museo del Prado in Madrid. based on the scant records that exist of his life, scholars have tentatively suggested that among other possible mental and physical disabilities, he may have been autistic. as an autistic person myself, idk, there's just something so familiar and haunting in the image and like an odd sense of both connection and deep sorrow. idk how to explain it but it's just a very powerful image to me.

okay yikes I hopped on my art history train and now it has massively gotten away from me 😅

before I go, I wanted to comment on your mention of hux and out myself here as a major hux simp. idk why but after tlj I was just down so damn bad for this silly little guy and that has not really abated 😅

anyway, thank you for always being so kind and wonderful about my long messages!!

sending love, hugs, and a virtual piece of the chocolate cake that I made yesterday (if you want some) 🥰

🐍 🔪

Hello, my darling!! now I'm the one apologizing for the insane delay of my reply! this week has a little hectic but right now I'm in my 7hr class in my 'puter while the students work so I can sit down and reply to you properly.

A vacation AND a new puppy!??? that sounds amazing! I freaking love dogs and I'm always happy to hear about people's pets! may I ask where are you going off to?? do you know the race of the puppy?

Also, I totally get you about thinking you're not making sense because I feel that way all the time, but let me assure you that you most definitely are! and seriously, thank you for taking the time to write/share such a thorough and detail analysis on it! (like I've told you recently, I'm in awe at your knack for researching)

Re: Foucault and Velazquez. I'm glad I'm not the only one because, it's insane. I agree with you, scholars that write in such a way make it seem like they write egotistically, and not considering their readers at all. I'm always grateful when I find an author that writes in a way that is easy to follow (not saying that they dumb down their writing, but rather that they express their ideas clearly and to the point).

I also agree that Las Meninas isn't his best work! this take will be super underrated, but I once saw an exhibition of Velazquez' prints in a collection along with Goya and I found that very refreshing and interesting to see because I'd never seen that part of his work before.. But also because they also have a very haunting quality to them. I looked up The Jester! I'd never seen it before and it definitely stirred something because of the expression that he painted on him. Like, the smile looks very pained, and having the context that you told me definitely changes my perspective. I also looked up some of the other paintings of the court entretainers and seeing them all together definitely projects something tragic. Some of them are smiling but in an uncomfortable way, while others are posing in a very stiff way, where you can tell that, despite being entretainers, being in front of the artist makes you wonder that they must've felt examined and exposed and even objectified. Now I don't know if I'm the one making sense (?), but thank you so much for sharing this!! I never had much interest in Velazquez before, but now I'm very intrigued to read more on this matter! If you wrote about this AND about The Hasburgs, that must've been quite a paper, dear!

ALSO, FELLOW HUX SIMP!! AHHHHH YES YES YES! In this house (blog) Hux is the main husband! I'll never stop being salty over how they misused Domhnall Gleeson and Hux's arc because, his relationship with Kylo Ren would've been an amazing thing to explore, instead of having crusty old Snoke that ultimately wasn't even relevant at all. Hux and Kylo could've been the Tarkin and Darth Vader of the new generation and I'm AHHH THE LOST POTENTIAL

Thank YOU for coming to chat to ye old inbox!! I know it takes me a while to reply because my brain is literal scramble eggs at this point of the semester, but it makes me very happy to receive these messages every time! so thank you for keep coming back, and I will gladly accept that chocolate! and I can send you a piece of homemade pumpkin bread (which is my specialty) if you like it!

Hope you have the most fun vacation, and best of luck with the new puppy! x

#🐍 🔪

[zackcrazyvalentine]

Saw requests were open so here I am! 😊

I’d love to request headcannons of the Demon Brothers + Undatables (If you can, if not you can just do the Brothers) from Obey Me reacting to an MC that has Galaxy eyes. Their eyes are a glossy purple-blue, they have star-like pupils that changes patterns everytime they blink, and rather than blush red; They blush purple and get mini constellations across their face and ears. If they cry, their tears are hella sparkly too! MC has baby pictures/family photos to prove their eyes are natural and run in the family.

YOOOO!! As someone who has zodiac sign related OCs, and that loves the stars, this is such a wonderful prompt~❤️

Since this involves many characters, it’ll be under the cut and slightly shorter per character than previous hcs, but hopefully still enjoyable

HEADS UP! This includes spoilers for lessons ~14-15 (and has yandere themes in someone's belphie's part)

Here you go, luv!

-- -- --

OVERVIEW

Alright, so it’s a little obvious all the character are surprised with the looks of this human

Some are easier to convince it’s natural, while others think it’s a product of permanent magic/demon contracts

Needless to say, all of them get lost in MC’s eyes

All of them try to make them blush or cry, in their own special ways, to see their full beauty

💙👿 Lucifer 🖋️

“Apologies if my stare unsettles you.” He took their hand and placed a kiss upon their knuckles, “Your eyes are simply magnificent. I find myself unable to look away.”

The first thing that crosses Luci’s mind when he meets them is  “Which demon did they sign a contract with to look like that?”

I think this one will try to fight back the urge to stare at them and be mesmerized by their beauty

Eventually, he just gives up and lets his eyes wander to their face and examine the sparkling stars

Whether he does it on purpose or not, Lucifer makes MC blush that lovely shade of wine purple. Always a gift to see the constellations that show up in their dark flush

Likes to stroke their face, especially run his thumb along their cheek and try to feel the shining lights on their skin

Will try to point out the constellations and stars he recognizes

💛😈 Mammon 💰💸

“Whu-? Huh?! No, no! Absolutely not! I-I wasn’t looking at ya because of the shining stars in your eyes… but, uh… Could ya maybe look into my eyes for a moment? Please?”

Oh god… when Mammon meets them, one and only one thought crosses his mind: If human limbs were already sought after in the Devildom market… How much money would this LIVE human with stars in their eyes cost?

(yup, let’s face it, folks… Mammon may be one of the very first sweethearts we see in game, but he’s still a demon, one very greedy demon)

Just let him see their tears. Boy, may any omnipotent force help them because he WILL try to make them cry just to see how much demons, witches and wizards pay for their sparkly tears

But then~ Whatever was left of his tender angel heart crumbled when he succeeded the first time. Never did it again and never collected any tears to sell

Mammon likes to explore their skin for more constellations. Arms, hands, shoulders, legs, feet, neck, anything they allow to touch!

What he loves most? Making them cry out of laughter and seeing little glittering drops roll down their cheeks, which he then proceeds to wipe away

Always gets lost in their eyes, but denies he was staring

🧡👿 Leviathan 🎮

“You’re just like an anime character! Wait, could it be that.. the author was inspired by your ancestor?!”

BOY OH BOY LEVI’S ELATED

Seriously, once his contract’s done and he accepts them into his room, he won’t ever stop examining their cheeks and eyes (with respect, of course, he knows how weird and uncomfortable it is to be observed so intently) 

You know the first thing he did was introduce them to his anime characters that have features similar to them

GUESS WHAT??? HE ADORES WHEN THEY LIGHT UP HIS ROOM WITH THEIR CONSTELLATIONS!

Makes sure to watch super cheesy lovely shoujo, romantic, and cute anime/movies just so he can see how the blush darkens their cheeks and ears

Levi already zoned out when watching Henry’s big aquarium, he 100% does so too when watching the patterns in their eyes shift with each blink

The otaku musters all his courage, when feeling brave enough, to place a kiss on their cheeks bc they’re just too adorable (both proceed to flush deep red/purple)

💚 Satan 👿📖

“Wonderful… Thank you for showing me the night sky. It’s even more breathtaking when through your eyes.”

Alright, there are pictures that prove it’s all natural… but, where are the written records of space-filled humans? He gets to researching (if he finds proof or not, I leave it up to you)

Regardless, they’re an enigma to him, and he’d love to keep observing you up close

Oh, if only he could read and look at their face at the same time~

Satan may or may not have a secret notebook in which he records different occurrences that happened with MC and how he would describe their unique beauty in that moment 

Many of his books and encyclopedias have maps of the sky, he’s taken up some constellations (which he points out, just like Lucifer pls don’t k word me satan)

I swear, this boy… Wants to see their beauty immortalized in writing, described in only the most wonderful ways by his favorite authors (“An honest opinion, your allure deserves to be eternally portrayed in books so every living being can imagine what splendor the world holds.”)

Hard for him to pick a favorite aspect of theirs, but he certainly is very curious what genes caused such phenotype

💗😈 Asmodeus 💋🦂

“That’s not fair! How am I to compete with someone with galaxy eyes?! S-Surely, we’re both ethereal in our own ways? ...But I’m clearly still #1!”

B O Y 

One would think his first instinct was to try and seduce them… but oh no, no! For a moment there, Asmo thought he was Levi, feeling pure raw jealousy and envy at their magnificent eyes and glowing skin

He acted sweet and flirty just so his brothers wouldn’t suspect anything, but he felt terrible boiling magma in his stomach (why was he, a former angel, not blessed with looks as mesmerizing as theirs?)

It all changed once Asmo saw them awkwardly walk through RAD’s halls, littered with demons staring at their peculiar skin. Unwanted looks, intense stares, all of them varying in degrees of judgement. He remembered his first days as a demon, as a lust demon, how he disliked the stares at first. (“Looks like we’re not so different after all…”)

He went to their side, making light talk to take their attention off the stares. A human’s blush was never this beautiful before.

It was then when he became a little obsessed with throwing compliments their way to see the tips of their ears turn purple with little glittering spots

Asmodeus would adore to explore their entire body. Like, really, he wonders if their other… parts prone to blood rushes have the same purple tint

Allow him and he’ll cover every single little star on their skin with kisses

Asmo went from despising them to adoring every bit of them, but if he has to pick, their skin is his favorite

❤️👿 Beelzebub 🍔🤤

“Blink… Blink again… Once more... “ A very tender smile graced his lips, “Belphie would definitely adore your eyes.”

“But for me,” He wrapped his arms around them and lifted them up the ground, “Your blush whenever I hold you close is my favorite!” 

Like, really peeps, Beel immediately remembers his twin’s fascination with stars and the night sky when his eyes land on MC

It’s strange, but he feels at peace whenever this star filled human is with him

Beel isn't much to care for looks, but wow… this is one very interesting human

When you guys were helping Luke, he definitely stared at the flickering lights on their cheeks and ears to find sleep (and in that moment, he felt Belphie's and Lilith's calming presence with him once more)

They once cried of laughter due to some food incident, and WOW that is so pretty

May or may not have asked them if he could taste their tears asdfgjdi "They look tasty"

Always tries to surprise them with food and hugs once he noticed they blush constellations

Probably the only thing able to make him eat slower is watching the shifting starts in their eyes

💜👿 Belphegor 🛏️💤

"I...uhm…" He blushed lightly, "[Name], could you please look at me? Stars are my favorite...and you, your eyes..." Belphegor is at a total loss of words at the magic in their stare.

I'm going to delve into that before we get to the fluff so

SPOILERS FOR LESSON 16 / YANDERE BELPHIE AHEAD

Sure, he loved their eyes once he saw stars in them...but they are human

Boy, oh boy, did he ENJOY wholeheartedly seeing those glittering tears roll down their face as he took their life

"Say… Would you mind me taking your eyes out to keep as mine? They'll surely look nice hanging from my headboard"

"Is your blood star filled too? Let us see!"

Such a shame that it was a human who was blessed with such wonderful features~

END OF YANDERE (spoilers for other lessons continue)

After learning they're Lilith's descendant, he wonders if their stars are product of her angelic lineage

"Sister… is this your way of telling me to be happy? Bringing a human that is so kind and pretty into my life?"   "You filled them with the stars I love so much… Thank you"

What DOESN'T he love about them? Eyes, cheeks, skin, all the flickering stars and shades of blue-purple they blush in, their pupils and eye color

But out of it all, he adores looking at their eyes as he falls asleep

Also likes to trace the stars on their skin, be it forming constellations or in random patterns

Tickle wars happen with him, Beel and MC to see the glittering liquid from how hard they're laughing

I seriously cannot express how much Belphie's in love with this whole human    Fun, caring, intelligent, kind, adventurous, and just… plain perfect

😈 Lord Diavolo 👑

"I was not 'blessed' like the brothers to see clear skies in the Celestial Realm, and it's uncommon for me to go up into the human world." Diavolo sat close to them as Barbatos left after serving tea. "But I can say I'm far more blessed with you here to show me the stars." A handsome smile shaped his lips, widening after they blushed.

Honestly, Diavolo is hard to pin for me

Sure, he gets surprised by the human's looks, but welcomes them with open arms regardless

Actually enjoys their company because he gets to see a little piece of the night sky he gets to see very few times

When they show him their baby pictures to prove it's all natural and real, the Prince will take to share some of his own (just ‘cuz, to bond)

He likes to make them laugh, if not to see the small shining tears, to see their face flush dark purple and show constellations

Their presence is calming

He sometimes comes with the request of sitting together so he can see their starry eyes to help him settle down and relax

😈 Barbatos ☕

"These are very particular features… Perhaps I should visit the past to know what led to this?" The butler pondered. "No, I certainly wouldn't like my actions to alter timelines and prevent you from being here." A polite, yet teasing, smirk came to his face.

Like Satan, Barbatos would want to find written records of the existence of other starry humans

Very curious what caused this in a human, but he himself hypothesizes it's due to the angelic lineage

Likes to say flirty things to make them flush, he chuckles every time

Is very interested to see the magical potential their tears have for potions and protection charms

Curious to see if their tears can be used in food preparations (thinks his special tea would look even better with some of their tears added to it)

With how his ability is time travel, Barbatos likes to (privately) call himself Time while he dubs MC Space

He likes their blushes most

😇 Simeon 📖

"If only I had met you sooner, I would've included you in my books. Your character would've been adored by many; not just because of appearance, but also due to your kind heart."

Simeon likes that there's a little piece of sky here with him

He's also one to wonder if their looks are due to Lilith's blood, will have to do some research back in the Celestial Realm

Is always complimenting their eyes

Half expected their eyes to reflect the actual sky at different hours (dawn, evening, dusk, sundown, etc.)

Whenever he stumbles upon a cute star or moon shaped accessory or sweater, he buys it as a gift for them

Likes their eyes the most. He's an angel and has seen many interesting pairs of eyes in his heavenly siblings, but none as breathtaking as theirs

His time writing TSL may be coming to an end, but poetry is always an option to share his admiration for MC with the world~

😇 Luke 🧁🎂

"Hey hey! Michael used to say my eyes look like sunrise!" The small one exclaimed with a big smile, "I'm dawn and you're the night!" Luke giggled.

OMG, THIS CUTIE 🥺💕

Forgive him for staring longer than is welcomed, he's just very amazed by their looks!

He's seen angels with sparkles in their hair and wings, but to see a human with stars and night sky on their skin!!! Is fascinating!

Luke is very grateful to have met MC, he just feels super blessed to know someone as unique as them!

Will use them as inspiration for cookie and cake decorating

Another one curious about what their tears can add to desserts

But don't worry! So long as MC is in his line of sight, he will not allow a single tear to be shed!

To make sure no demon endangers them, this little angel will do his best to protect MC!

He adores their eyes and always asks to look at them ("You can look at mine in return! And see the daybreak Michael sees in them!")

🧙🏻‍♂️ Solomon 🔮

"Oh? What is this I see, a rival?" The wizard chuckled, "We can share the starry sky aesthetic, I don't mind."

SPACE 🤝 AESTHETIC 🤝🤝🤝

He immediately fires a lot of questions their way to find as much information as he can about their looks, magical power, and magical properties of their peculiar features

While the rest just wonder what their tears can do, Solomon is the fearless soul to actually ask for a sample to conduct tests with

If they become close, Solomon will find a way to preserve one of their tears to carry with him at all times

Yup, you guessed it! His favorite feature is their tears

...he makes them shed quite the handful with the cooking he gives as thanks for the samples lol

This one wonders if they are also star filled on the inside...as in, their tissues and organs (and blood)

But worry not, unless he’s given permission, Solomon will keep his hands to himself 

-- -- --

Sorry if this is so short Dx

And aah...sorry for including yandere themes, but it just fit and was interesting to think of~

Still, hope this was enjoyable

Thank you for the request!!

#march 2021 special #obey me #swd #obey me! #obey me x reader #lucifer obey me #om lucifer #lucifer #mammon #om mammon #mammon obey me #leviathan #levi #om leviathan #leviathan obey me #satan #satan obey me #om satan #asmodeus #asmo #om asmodeus #asmodeus obey me #beelzebub #beezebub obey me #om beelzebub #belphegor #belphie #om belphegor #belphegor obey me #request pavilion

[thepavementsings]

I can't tell what your opinion is on m*x sometimes but I am curious

this has been sitting in my inbox for a minute anon but lol fair I guess. I will put this under the cut just in case lmao

In general in like RPF Sports spaces I very much have three lists of like: these people as athletes vs these people as humans vs these people as 'blorbos'/paper dolls and max is a great example of this

As an athlete I think he's clearly talented but also very controversial. Mostly I don't like the way he races a lot of the time but I also don't really care as long is the race is exciting and not stupid/taking away from the sport i'm trying to watch.

As a 'person' (personality really we don't know these people etc etc) I wont get into it but it's a no from me personally like actual max i don't care for for a lot of reasons, but I ultimately don't really care about who he is or what he stands for so. 

As a PAPER DOLL however I think he is one of the most fascinating characters to think about/parse through his little psyche. And his (highly fictionalized/assumed) relationships with people in the paddock are FASCINATING. Like to psychoanalyze him/his interactions with others there's veery few doing it like him these are the facts. And the scholarship on him is on fucking point and very fun. It's a sandbox I LOVE to watch others play in and like... this is literally sports RPF blogging its not real it's fine.

Sometimes I will put things on the dash because I find it funny/interesting/I have thoughts but like.. they're all a heavily fictionalized version of this man. That being said I don't think I would ever super indulge myself in like really 'writing' him in rpf just bc that's a personal boundary I have for myself about rpf (if you don't like them/don't care about someone don't project that onto/into the space/character for people who do imo!!!) but it's not a boundary i expect of other people!

I'd like to think i'm usually pretty clear about when I'm sports blogging vs when i'm sports RPF blogging but yeah thats that! he’s literally blorbo from my friends’ shows to me 

#answering this late hours bc it's been glaring at me in my inbox for weeks lol it needed to go #based on the asterisk im assuming ur not a fan lol #sorry if people are mad about this either way but #like i cant ignore mostly the fact that he is surrounded by fascists and the racism apologism #but i understand that their is person and their is character #i feel like im too neutral sometimes like actual formula 1 is SO separate to this blog 85% of the time so really idc #there's also a lot more people here than there used to be so i feel like people dont really get my vibe which is like #simultaneously fence sitter and high horse lmaooo #max

[volturiwolf]

The Volturi Princess - A Felix Volturi x fem!Reader Story (part 3)

No of Words: about 5313

Mentions of: Abandonment, Abortion, Anxiety, Blood, Bruises, Coma/Comatosed State, Death Emotional Abuse, Emotional and Physical Pain, Gaslighting, Greece/Greek Language - with translation, Heartbreak, Italian Language - with translation, Manipulation, Murder, Pain, Panic Attacks, Pregnancy, Suffering, Suicide/Suicidal Thoughts, Swear Language, Throwing Up/Puking, Witches/Wizards/Witchcraft

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part 1 part 2

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"The Volturi Princess " Tag List (reply if you want to be tagged or removed):

@felixvolturisprincess @singerj2002 @mrtony-stank1 @ikissedthescarsonherskin @alecvolturiswifeforever @hshehdyhd

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Felix’s POV:

We have been traveling for over a year now, Demetri tracking Carlisle and us following behind him. Demetri located him across the Atlantic, so we swam across the ocean to reach him. Almost a year and a half after leaving Volterra, we tracked Carlisle while he was working as a doctor somewhere in the northern United States. He was surprised to see us, but we kept our austere facade to maintain our sovereignty towards him. He welcomed us gladly in his small house.

It was a two-story building, and it smelled of old wood and mold, but I guess that was the best he could do for now. The living conditions around here did not seem to be ideal. Apart from the Volturi and the Egyptian coven, no other vampire lived comfortably, in castles, mansions, or even big houses; most vampires were nomads, traveling around and living by hunting whenever they could. So, Carlisle actually living in a house, even if it looked like this, was way better than living the nomad life.

“Jane, Alec, Demetri, Felix. To what do I owe this pleasure? Can I offer you anything?” Carlisle had always been one of the kindest of our kind, too compassionate for a vampire.

“No, Carlisle, thank you, we’re good. We are on a mission, and we have a few questions for you.” Jane took it up to herself to start the conversation.

“Please, sit down so we can talk.” Carlisle offered us to sit around the table that was in the middle of the ground floor. We each took a seat at the table. “So, may I ask what it is all about? I don’t think I have personally acted in a way to upset the Volturi.”

“No, indirectly, you haven’t.” Jane continued. “We wanted to ask you a few questions regarding (Y/N). We think that you may have heard by now that she has left Volterra.”

“Yes, word came around. I met a few nomads from Europe some time ago, and they told me that (Y/N) left Volterra, probably permanently.”

I tried to suppress a sob that was fighting to leave my throat. Carlisle knew that (Y/N) left, everyone knew that (Y/N) left. They didn’t know she left her mate behind, and they shall never find out that she was my mate. I didn’t even want to think about the possibility of (Y/N) being in danger if anyone found out that we were mates. I had too many targets on my back to risk anything happening to her.

It was my turn to intervene. “Have you seen her? Has she ever come around here?”

Carlisle turned to face me. “I did. Once. She stayed with me for about a year; that was about 6 or 7 years ago. She tracked me through her memories. She has become quite skilled at that.” Demetri and I looked at each other confused. (Y/N) could track as skillfully as Demetri now?

Carlisle continued. “Anyway, she seemed concerned. She told me she had been traveling for quite some time, but she felt like she was missing a piece of herself, of her past. For a few months, she wanted to learn more about me, my job, how I was doing with the whole “animal blood” diet, simple curiosity really. She had been training herself to abstain from human blood, so it was easier for her to go hunt with me. She told me..”

Carlisle turned to look at me now. “She told me about your bond, Felix.” So, she has felt our bond, too! “She told me that she was scared for you, for your safety within the Volturi. She was worried about all of you, but particularly you, Felix. Being her mate means you are basically a target for anyone who wishes to harm (Y/N). She told me she ran away to protect you. As long as no one knew of your bond, you were safe. The traveling and meeting the world was just an extra benefit for her and her gift.”

“Her gift?!” We all exclaimed in unison. (Y/N) never claimed a “gift”, so how could this be possible? Did she lie? Did she even know about her gift?

“Before you say anything, she didn’t even know what her gift was. It is way more complicated than you think. I guess she’d appreciate it if I gave you an idea about it.” Carlisle paused for a few moments. If my heart was beating, I swear it would have stopped by now.

“You know how, for example, Jane, you can induce mental pain, or you, Alec, can restrict anyone’s senses?” The Twins nodded at Carlisle. “Well, (Y/N) can do both, and so much more.” We were kind of shocked. No one has ever had a gift similar to the Twins; that’s why they were in the Volturi. Because they were unique.

“(Y/N)’s gift is copying others’ gifts. That’s why she could also track me; she had copied Demetri’s gift.” Carlisle pointed at Demetri, who looked utterly shocked now.

I would lie if I said I didn’t feel the same way or scared even. I was not scared because of (Y/N); I was scared for (Y/N). This newly-found discovery meant she would be way more important to Aro than we ever thought. He wouldn’t just let her go - not that this was his intention before, but now, she would be even more precious to him and his cause; she would now be the perfect weapon for him to use against other vampires. I had to find her and warn her.

“Do you know where she is now?” My voice came out more stern than I intended it to be.

Carlisle nodded his head slightly. “I may know where she is now. Before she left, she was trying to find out as much as she could about her parents. I assume that was the “missing piece” she was referring to? Anyway, she may be after her parents. I mean they do know her nature better than any of us does. Don’t forget that (Y/N) is half-witch. No one could ever teach her how to be one; only her father could be the one to do so. So, if I stand corrected, she is looking for them. And there’s only one place that (Y/N) has ever linked to her parents.”

“Greece.” Demetri stepped in. Demetri was the only one who could understand (Y/N)’s connection with Greece; it was their birthplace, their origin, their true home.

“Exactly. If you find her parents, you’ll most likely find her. Even if she’s not with them, it will be easier to track her if you have her parents’ assistance.”

We nodded and we stood up. “Thank you for your help, Carlisle. You were most helpful.” Jane spoke for all of us.

“It was my pleasure.” Carlisle led us to the door, but before we left, Jane turned to him one last time. “We think we can trust you that this conversation stays between us.”

“Of course, Jane. Have a safe trip and take care of yourselves.”

“You too.” Alec smiled at Carlisle.

What Carlisle said at the end had me worried for (Y/N). “I hope you find her soon. Her parents never had the best reputation around.” What kind of people was (Y/N)’s family anyway?

----------------------------------------------------------

Tracking (Y/N) proved to be way more complicated and debilitating than we thought it would be. We assumed that the closer we were to Greece, the easier it would be for Demetri to pick up her tenor. We were wrong; we were going around blindly, not a clue about (Y/N)’s whereabouts. Even when we finally set our feet on Greek ground, we still didn’t know where to start looking for her. Nobody had a clue where she could be; we didn’t even know her birthplace.

Demetri took it upon him to start his research in a place he knew well enough: Athens. Athens was the capital of Greece’s civilization for many centuries, but, at the time of Demetri’s birth, during the Byzantine times, Constantinople emerged as the center of the Eastern Byzantine Empire, while Rome remained the center of the Western Byzantine Empire.

Athens was not regarded as highly as it used to, during Pericles’ “Golden Century”, as the 5th century BC was known. It still was an important and historical city, but it has lost its title as the “capital” eons ago. The city was taken advantage of by both “allies” and Ottomans and seemed to have lost part of its previous glory. Still, it was beautiful; I may have been quite “old” myself, but I could still admire the history around me.

It reminded of (Y/N)’s stories and books; knowing Ancient Greek history was one of the first things she took an interest in. The fact that she was able to travel to Athens, with or without Aro, quite a few times also developed her fascination regarding the Ancient Greek arts, philosophy, and overall way of living. Of course, it wasn’t easy being a woman then, or ever really, but she was more financially privileged than the average Athenian - vampire wealth had always been an actual thing, and Aro always prided himself to be a “collector” of wealth (and talented vampires for the matter).

We arrived in Greece at a transitional stage; the country has been experiencing a war against the Ottomans for a few years now, and it was evident around the city of Athens. There were many casualties during the war, many damages around the streets, the houses, and there seemed to be a climate of misery and decline.

Yet, the country had recently elected a prime minister, who declared Nafplio, a city in Peloponnese, as Greece’s capital. That was our next stop, as we couldn’t find anything in particular that could indicate (Y/N) being in Athens. Apart from the poor living conditions, the country was experiencing a plague pandemic wave, which killed even more people, but authorities worked hard on containing the cases, and it seemed to have been working.

Still, without a single clue about (Y/N)’s location, the only thing we could do is go around searching for any possible information. We could only travel at night, and hide during the day; Greece, just like Italy, had always been blessed with sunny days, for the majority of a calendar year.

It wasn’t ideal with us being vampires, but Volterra was an ideal strategic location for the Volturi to travel across the vampire and human world, rule, and impose their laws whenever it was needed. Just like always, we now also had to be secretive about our existence.

I thought about how lucky (Y/N) was in that situation; being a non-fully vampire, she didn’t “glow” in the sun like us. She had a more healthy-skin-like glow, a healthy and subtle glow that made me even more attracted to her - if that was even possible. That basically meant that she could technically go anywhere and everywhere; the weather did not affect her, the sun did not affect her.

I started getting frustrated and disappointed. It wasn’t only (Y/N) I had in my mind; apparently, during the years of the Greek Revolution, many vampires, Greek or non-Greek, started secretly fighting to claim territories for themselves.

We knew that it wasn’t part of our duty, but it wouldn’t hurt if we could actually claim Greek land for the Volturi. Having both Italy and Greece under our control could mean more power, more resources, more blood. It only seemed natural; the three Volturi kings were born in Greece, all three of their wives were born in Greece, Demetri and Chelsea were born in Greece. (Y/N) was born in Greece.

Greece could easily become an extension of our territory - Italy was already ours in its entirety - and it would only be the start. It would be easier to control and deal with any possible riots from other covens - the Egyptians and the Romanians in particular. We didn’t fear either of them, but the Romanians have been holding resentment towards the Volturi for a couple thousand years, so anything could be expected from their side at any moment.

I shared my thoughts with the Twins and Demetri. They all agreed that it was a plausible plan; it would show others that the Volturi are still as powerful as they have ever been, and should be feared. Besides, we knew that just the four of us would be able to subjugate any vampire that crossed our paths. With the Twins’ powers, Demetri’s tracking skills, and my strength, it would be impossible for others to resist or challenge us.

We started interrogating any vampire we found wandering or hunting at night; none of them worthy enough to fight us or even gifted enough to join the Volturi. It was quite easy to find the leaders of these “newly-made” covens, or alliances, as they seemed. Because none of them inspired loyalty to each other; none of them was a coven in the sense the Volturi were. They were more like vampires who came together to fight for territory control; I doubt if they would even manage to stay together for one more day. They did not only lack loyalty towards their "leaders", but also discipline, principles, and basic rules of survival and solidarity towards the other members.

It was quite easy to take over any “coven” in Southern Greece, including the island of Crete. We started moving north, taking over the territories of Thessaly and Epirus, something which the Greek humans did not manage to acquire from the Ottomans yet. We were to take over Macedonia and Thrace next, but we were met with an unexpected obstacle.

Every vampire we would interrogate regarding these two territories would say the same thing: none of them knew who owned them, but whoever tried to claim the territories never returned back, dead or alive. The mystery that surrounded the person or people behind the leadership of these areas made their skin crawl; they all refused to “help” us any further, no matter how much Jane, Alec, and I tried, which made me kind of worried, or more like curious, but I didn’t want to show any weakness or let them question my effectiveness.

Every one of them was just a “normal” vampire; we were better, stronger, gifted, and we have proved that we can bring results every single time. No other vampire has ever dared go against us; we wouldn’t allow them to question us now either.

We continued traveling up north, determined to face whoever it was behind the territories there. I didn’t pay attention to the slight pain in my guts as we were traveling through the country, but it was becoming more and more intense as we continued going north.

We didn’t know how we would find the vampires behind this “operation”, so our plan would be to act in any way possible to provoke them into coming out of their “hiding spot”. For a few days, we were rummaging any small village we could find, killing the villagers and draining them of their blood - not a very “Volturi tactic" may I say. We were supposed to hide our existence, not challenge our luck by killing so many people; yet, this was the only way we thought that could possibly lurk the vampires out of their “comfort zone”.

As we were traveling through Macedonia, we came across a rather developed town, compared to the villages we have seen before. The city was surrounded by tall stone walls. There were a few rivers on its western side, forests and mountains on its northeastern side, and swamps and marshes on its southern side. We couldn’t hunt freely here, at least not during daylight; there was no way we would go unnoticed if we started hunting anywhere in the area. We decided to run through the forests, see if there was a place we could stay for a while; if there was a human or more we could feed off of; if there was a sign of the vampires or (Y/N).

During the last few weeks, I’ve been thinking that our mission has been more about expanding our power and influence, and not as much about locating (Y/N). Actually, it felt more like locating (Y/N) was more of an afterthought now. We lost the purpose of our mission; the reason we came together all along.

It wasn’t as if we would actually be directly benefiting by the territories we claimed; we were still working on behalf of the Volturi. We didn’t ask the kings to claim Greek territories; yet, we did, because we felt obliged to consider their own good once again, this time at the expense of finding (Y/N). Once again, we became the victims of the influence they had on us, and we played their game.

“Why are we even doing this?” I yelled frustratedly. My friends turned to look at me.

“What do you mean, Felix?” Jane seemed slightly annoyed. “We’ve come here to claim the territories, to show these savages who the boss is here.”

“No, Jane, they are not savages, we didn’t come here to claim territories, and we don’t have to show them “who is the boss”. They already know that the Volturi rule the vampire world. No. No. We came here to search for (Y/N). Not to “claim territories”. Not to “show them”. We came here for (Y/N). We..We lost our purpose. We lost the true meaning of our mission. We just started claiming the land for the Volturi, for Aro. We..We forgot about her.”

My eyes were stinking with venom. I felt weak, I felt as if I betrayed her. I promised to myself that I would bring her back home, that I would protect her. It’s been so long and we still haven’t found her. We just kept wasting time on things that shouldn’t matter to us. We should not care about expanding our influence, our territory, our power. We should care about bringing the Princess back.

Jane lowered her head apologetically. “I’m sorry, Felix. I didn’t know you felt this way. I have to admit it though; we did lose track of time and we forgot about the actual purpose of this mission. We once again forgot that (Y/N) has always been way more important than any power in the world. I’m sorry. We all are. I promised you we’ll start searching for her right away, okay?”

I nodded affirmatively. We had to find (Y/N) as soon as possible. We were not only running out of time but also out of hope that (Y/N) was in Greece or anywhere else, that she was alive. We got so distracted by our conversation that we didn’t notice we were being watched until we all started screaming in pain. I fell on my knees, the pain on the back of my head unbearable, and that’s when I blacked out.

----------------------------------------------------------

I didn’t know how much time passed being unconscious. It felt like a new sensation to me; being a bit over 2000 years old, I haven’t lost my senses once - except for the times Alec liked to play games on me. I didn’t feel like myself; it didn’t feel right. I didn’t like being restricted of my senses, especially now, especially here, in an unknown place. My mind was blurry and I couldn’t see anything distinct around me; I couldn’t see almost anything. I tried to move my hands around but I couldn’t as if the tightest rope in the world was holding me in place.

“No need to fight, sweetheart.” I heard a woman’s voice. “There is no way to escape.”

“Who are you? Why am I here? Where are the others?”

“Felix? Is that you?” I heard Demetri’s voice on my right.

“Demetri? Is that you? Where are Jane and Alec?”

“I am here.” I heard Alec’s voice on my left.

“Me too." Jane replied.

“Alexandre, please, I cannot start with this again.”

Suddenly, I could see again. I was still physically restricted, but my eyes could see them crystal clear and my mind was in order once again. The woman in front of me was very imposing, though of average size. Her long, curly hair framed her face beautifully and her piercing red eyes were piercing through my soul. The man standing next to her was only a few centimeters taller; he had short, straight hair, and his eyes were looking between the four of us sternly. Who were they even? Why were we even here? Why us? As if she read my mind, a woman spoke to me.

“Oh, deary. We’re not going to tell you who we are. But you are going to tell us what you, Volturi guards, are doing in our territory!”

“How do you know who we are?” I exclaimed. Of course, everyone knew the Volturi as the authority of the vampire world, but not all vampires around here have ever met us specifically, or any other member of the coven for the matter.

“Your crest, dear. I have known that crest for far too long. Way before you were even born. I see that dear Aro never changed it. He does like to remain in his same, old ways after all. Never changing, never moving forward, still imposing his “laws”, I’m assuming?” The woman seemed to know way far about the Volturi and Aro. She became a danger for our coven, from the moment she and the man abducted us. She should have never done that; they both would be punished for their actions.

“Dear, I won’t get punished..for anything. You, on the other hand, are in a pretty difficult situation. You see, my husband and I are not going to let you get away until you tell us why you are here.”

“Pain.” I heard Jane saying. The woman turned to look at her but she didn’t even flinch. I heard Jane screaming in return.

“Oh, sweetheart. Your powers won’t work on either of us. You see, I am a shield, so don’t even try to hurt us. On the contrary, WE can hurt you just as much, if not more.” The woman smiled evilly, while Jane was writhing in pain.

“Please, stop hurting my sister.” Alec pleaded, unable to use his gift against the couple.

“So, you are the “Terror Twins”. Alec and Jane, I see.” The woman knew their nickname? “Oh, yes, I do, dear.” She turned to look at me. “You see, I was once part of the Volturi. Technically, still am. However, I left, way before any of you joined the coven. To put it into perspective, I was there when Didyme lived but I left way before she was killed. Dear Marcus has never been the same ever since. I still feel somewhat of a connection to the coven, though I am able to make my own decisions because I managed to escape them. We were actually passing by Volterra a few times. I wonder how you never noticed us, though our powers would practically make us mentally invisible from Demetri, over here, or any other vampire, really.”

She knew Demetri, too?

“Felix, dear, I know all of you and about you. You see, my dear daughter has a special connection with all of you, a kind of friendship neither my husband, nor I quite understand. It wasn’t easy for her to keep her memories secret; though she is an amazing shield - which makes me so proud, she is kind of “vulnerable” when she is sleeping. And my husband’s magic is quite strong and easy to penetrate her mind and memories when she does eventually sleep.”

Her daughter? Could that be…?

“WHERE IS SHE?” The question slipped out of my mouth without even thinking about it first.

My anger could not be controlled right now. I was pushing myself to my limits to break my fetters, to no avail. Were that woman and that man (Y/N)’s parents? I started making some connections here and there; they looked similar to (Y/N), though so different at the same time. Their immortality, their red eyes, their confidence, and their aggression did not remind me of (Y/N). She had a pure face, a face of kindness, she was not like them.

“You think so? Alexandre, can you please call (Y/N), agapi mou?” The woman turned to the man, and the man started moving his fingers in front of him, creating some sort of a wave around him.

Within a few seconds, the door burst open and the first thing I saw was a red silky fabric flowing around the air. When the fabric settled down slowly, I saw her for the first time after so long. She has changed..a lot. Her (Y/E/C) eyes were replaced by piercing red ones, with a slight hint of (Y/E/C) around the pupils. Her eyes apathetic and stern; her facial features more defined; her hair reached a little below her shoulders, straight and shiny, like her father’s. She still looked as beautiful as ever.

She stared at us, focusing her eyes mostly on me. Her heartbeat sounded steady and strong. I was relieved; she was still human, they had not turned her fully vampire yet. She took a few steps farther into the house, her feet bare but surprisingly clean, no dirt, no grass had stained them. She stood right beside the woman, who I now knew was her mother and Aro’s daughter.

“What are they doing here?” Her voice came out stern, yet it was music to my ears.

I missed her voice so much. I missed her so much. Our mate bond, weakened by the distance and time spent apart, slowly started forming again. I felt it; I felt my existence becoming meaningful again. I felt my breath hitching in my throat, her presence provoking so many different feelings and emotions inside me. However, she still seemed cold and distant, and I couldn’t quite read her face. Did she not feel the same? Has she forgotten me? Does she hate me now?

I saw her gaze getting softer, even compassionate? She approached me and bent down slightly, placing her left hand carefully on my right cheek. She stared deeply into my eyes and I closed mine, leaning on her touch. It was the purest moment I have experienced in my 2000 years of life.

I opened my eyes and stared at her. I saw golden flakes scattered in between the red in her eyes. Once again, she took my breath away. It felt as if I fell in love with her all over again, a unique feeling of refreshment. We were lost in our own little world. She smiled slightly at me, the first time she did after such a long time.

“Enough! (Y/N) get away from him, now!” (Y/N) was forcefully removed away from me by her mother. She was looking at me pleadingly and then turned to look at her parents with such hatred. I’ve never seen her like this ever again, not even with Aro.

“YOU. WILL. NOT. TELL. ME. WHAT. TO. DO!” If looks could kill, (Y/N)’s parents would be dead by now. Her hands started lighting up, bright purple flames rising up. She was trying to intimidate her parents, but neither of them looked concerned in the slightest. She turned to us and with a dance-like move of her hand, we were finally freed of our fetters.

It was her father’s turn to speak. “(Y/N), let’s take this outside.” With a jerking motion of his hand, we all found ourselves, outside, in their house’s front yard.

“They’ve come to take you back to Volterra, back to Aro! Don’t you see it? They don’t care about you! They just want to please their master.” The words came bitter out of her mouth. She had a clear resentment towards the Volturi. “I will not let them take you away from me! Not again!”

“I know, mother, I’ve read their minds, too. Yet, I don’t see why YOU seem to think that you can make the decisions for me. I am my own self. I can make decisions for myself. And I get to choose what I do with my life.” (Y/N)’s voice was certain, powerful, in control. “They are not bad people, mother. They just have to follow orders, just like you followed Aro’s orders, just like I followed yours. That’s not going to happen anymore. I am taking control of my life!”

The sweet, little girl I got to see my whole life was becoming a strong, powerful woman right in front of my eyes. She was radiating power; she was taking control of her life. She was..my everything. She was becoming independent, her own self. To say I was proud of her, would be an understatement. She has always been special, but this newly-found power has clearly given her way more confidence and trust in herself.

She would finally be able to rule the Volturi. If she decided to come back to Volterra, she could definitely take over the coven. No one would be able to resist her or her gift. My thoughts were quickly interrupted when her dad started shouting in Greek.

Demetri, who was standing right next to me, saw the look of total confusion in my eyes. “I’ll translate for you.” I nodded at him. “So, her father says: Enough with this nonsense, (Y/N). Your place is here, with us. You owe us; we taught you what you needed to know about your magic. We taught you how to use it, how to develop it. You didn’t know enough to defend yourself back then.”

“Now, (Y/N) says: I don’t owe you anything. Yes, you did teach me how to use my magic, which I inherited from you. But, you gave me away to Aro. You couldn’t defend me or yourselves against him. You just offered me to him, as if I was a present for his birthday or something.”

“Now, her mother says: You, at least, owe it to yourself to get away from these tyrants. You know they don’t deserve you, so why are you still defending him? It’s that man, isn’t it? Now, (Y/N) says: That man has a name. Now, her mom says: You know, his name means “lucky”, "happy" in Greek. Yet, he hasn’t been that lucky or happy at all, has he? We read his mind, (Y/N), he’s not worthy of you.”

“Now, (Y/N) says: Guess what? I have also read his mind, and I have also read the two of you, as well. Don’t you think that it is only you who can read my mind while I’m sleeping! I’ve been reading your minds any chance I get! I know how you’ve been planning to use me, as a weapon against the Volturi! Guess again! I’m not going to let you manipulate me anymore! And that man deserves EVERYTHING in this world!”

“ENOUGH!” Her father shouted and threw a dark red glowing sphere, hitting (Y/N) and knocking her on the ground. My heart dropped at the sight, but she quickly stood up and gathered so much energy in her own hands, attacking her father with a powerful hit.

He got wounded, his face slightly cracked from his forehead to his jaw, yet he didn’t give up. He was about to attack her once again when his wife stopped him. She was looking at me and nodded to her husband. I heard (Y/N) screaming, but I didn’t make out what she was saying, as I started screaming myself and felt myself getting tossed in the air. Then, everything went black once again.

#felix volturi #felix volturi imagine #felix volturi x reader #volturi #twilight #twilight renaissance #twilight post #demetri volturi #alec volturi #jane volturi #the cullens #the denali coven

[hmslusitania]

I see we're going ape over buddie and Choices tonight so

Yknow in 2.07, when Shannon comes back and her and Eddie have their first scene together? The argument at the end, after Eddie says it wouldn't be a good idea for her to see Christopher bc she left them, she says she needed him, she needed a husband and a co-parent - and "I needed someone to have my back!"

To which EDDIE says, "I always had your back"

*insert Incredibles "coincidence? I think NOT" gif here*

(Also side note, I do like that the show doesn't try to sugarcoat what Shannon did being messed up, and that Eddie's own actions weren't really the right thing either[thinking about his conversation with Buck where he says he got to pretend he left for a noble cause even tho he was running], and that it was just a sticky situation that neither of them were equipped to handle in any way, and snowballed. I do kind of wish we could've gotten post-divorce Shannon and Eddie and Christopher interactions, figuring out how they fit together, if at all, bc I like those intricate and messy situations but I could see how that might get too close to retreading old ground re: Michael and Athena's divorce. But I do hate how ive seen the fandom like. Seem to oversimplify things with Shannon sometimes? And make her the ultimate villain, and Eddie Did Nothing Wrong, Ever)

Hi Anon!

The decision to have Buck and Eddie's first bonding moment end with "You can have my back any day" and "or, y'know, you could have mine" only to then six episodes later find out that at least a contributing factor to Eddie's marriage dissolving was that he "didn't have her back" is like. Such a galaxy brain chaos move for them to take, honestly. Like?? They could've had the phrasing be literally anything in 2x07 but instead they had it directly echo Buck and Eddie in 2x01. What was the reason? Why did they do this?

As for the rest of your ask:

(gosh this got long and, uh, opinionated. It is Not Pretty below the cut)

One of the things I really liked about Eddie Begins is that we did get to see him at the beginning of his journey in being Chris's dad because it gives us an opportunity to appreciate how amazingly he's grown as a father. Like, he didn't start out as a perfect dad and he was definitely kind of lost in the woods at the beginning there when it came to the whole "how do I parent" thing. And before Eddie Begins, we'd only ever seen the end result of the growth he's gone through, where he really is a fantastic dad whose son is basically his entire reason for being. Before Eddie Begins, we get to hear him say things like "I left first" and "I've failed that kid more times than I can count but I love him enough to never stop trying" but we kinda have to take that on faith? Because we hadn't actually seen him be anything besides a good dad until we saw his Begins episode. (And even then in his begins it's like "area man in his early 20s unsure how to care for small child while also coping with PTSD and a toxic support system" which like. yeah. no shit. there's one hell of a learning curve there)

The thing about Eddie and Shannon as a couple and as parents that always gets to me is that they were so fucking young. We don't know exactly how old Eddie is in the show, but we can guesstimate pretty safely that he's around the same age as Ryan which would make him between 23 and 24 when Chris was born, and it seems reasonable to believe Shannon was around the same age. It's also a pretty common reading in the fandom -- although I'm not sure how much canon support there is for it because we really, really don't know anything about their relationship pre-Christopher unless I'm forgetting something -- that they got married because Shannon got pregnant and that was the Done Thing. And when you're 23-24, baby on the way, freshly married, that is just like. So much. It sure as hell ruined my parents' relationship when they did that exact thing, and then they disliked each other until they were 27 and then they got divorced, and no one was happier than me about it, I have to tell you.

Back to the show, I can only give you my impressions, obviously, but the impression I have always gotten from the whole "I left too" conversation and the context that goes into it and the different behaviours we see exhibited by the characters is that Eddie "left" first and it comes across to me that he was basically an early twenty-something kid running scared from the abstract concept of being a father in general, and then when he was forced home by an honourable discharge, and was confronted with the reality of Christopher, he managed to step the fuck up and become Christopher's dad. It's there in 2x02, right? "Oh, you've got a kid? I love kids!" "I love this one." Eddie doesn't strike me as a Swiss Army Knife all-purpose Dad(tm) the way Bobby is. Eddie is Christopher's dad. (and like, of course, he's obviously moved by kids when he's on a call, we've seen that enough times to know that if there's a child who can even glancingly remind him of Christopher, Eddie's sense of self-preservation goes out the window, and I love that about him as heart-stopping as it can be in practice)

Shannon, on the other hand, didn't run from the idea of being a mother -- at first. When she left, it wasn't from the abstract. She left Chris (and "gave up" on Eddie, thanks Helena). She was not running from a concept, she was running from a reality. I think Shannon is a fascinating character to include in a television show as a side character, because she really isn't a one note character. Like, she was unarguably a bad mother, and from what we saw, she was a questionable romantic partner to have (but as you said, anon, Eddie was also not 100% the best romantic partner when he was with Shannon either; their entire relationship so far as I can tell was built on sexual chemistry which, uh, super does not sustain a relationship), but she also seems to have been a devoted daughter? I mean, yeah, it's entirely possible that her mom being sick was a convenient excuse to bail -- and obviously she didn't come back after her mom died, and didn't, y'know, contact her son or husband in the interim, so yes, I can see that being a valid way to read the situation. I don't think she's the Ultimate Evil, because she strikes me as a very human character in all the ways that people are more often than not really fucking flawed.

But then we get back to the actual break-up scene. The first time I watched it (and second, and third; then the fourth time the person I was watching with was like "I mean, sure, but it could also be read in this light") her "I'm just learning how to be someone's mother" speech really bothered me? Partly because it was the abstraction of it, right? Eddie doesn't like kids, he likes Christopher, and Shannon sort of had the inverse journey there, I guess, where it went from she didn't know how to be Christopher's mother, to she didn't know how to be a mother. And that speech bothered me because it always sounded to me like she was bailing again. She begged Eddie to let her back into Christopher's life (guilt? I guess?) and like, straight up bribed him with sex which was sure a choice, and then decides -- for a second time -- that she's out. It sounded, to me, she was handing Eddie papers and maybe, in a few years, possibly, once she'd had "time" to "figure out how to be someone's mother" she would try again. Just like she had in the interim between leaving when Christopher was little and the time of season 2.

And like, that could totally be a misunderstanding of the scene and what she was saying. It's what I took away from it, but that could very well be influenced by the fact I was raised by divorced parents and my dad had custody and if you count up all the time I spent with either parent when I was a minor, I was predominantly raised by my father and have had an especially tempestuous relationship with my mother that is mostly (sometimes) repaired now that I'm in my late twenties and have not lived with her since I was sixteen.

Back to the show, and to your comment that the fandom tends to treat Shannon like the Ultimate Evil and act like Eddie Did Nothing Wrong, I mean. Yeah. Fandom as a rule tends to shirk nuance. We're all fools here on the internet sitting in our blue industrial waste container crying about a wee woo show. I personally believe a more nuanced take on that might be that Eddie has shown a great capacity to learn from his mistakes (sometimes to make fun, shiny, new ones, but for the most part, just like ends up doing better the next time) and Shannon did not show that capacity in the time we knew her.

I think, depending on what they did with it, there was potential for an interesting storyline if they'd played through the divorce. I don't think it would've been rehashing ground covered by Michael and Athena's divorce because I can't see Eddie and Shannon having reached a point of amicability and friendship. The only thing we know they had in common was Christopher, and frankly, when you boil it down, the ways they engaged with Christopher as a person were so disparate that -- to me -- it really didn't seem like they had Christopher in common when you get right down to it. But I wouldn't have wanted to see Christopher and Eddie dragged through an ugly divorce process. They deserve better than that.

There's also a conversation to be had about Shannon's blatant ableism towards her own son, but that is extremely not my lane since I am not disabled myself. But even from an outside perspective, basically their entire parking lot conversation in Haunted, uh, haunts me with it's repugnance and the fact that instead of calling her on any of it, Eddie "Chronically touch starved" Diaz's response was to kiss her? Gosh golly do I wish that was one of the mistakes he learned from properly instead of finding a new, shiny version.

ANYWAY this got long, tl;dr (although if you clicked on the read more, you probably read it) version is No, Shannon is not the Ultimate Evil, she's a shitty mom not a demon in a skin suit and a pretty yellow sundress; and No, Eddie is not a flawless human who's never done wrong in his life but holy fuck is he trying and he'd be the first person to tell you he's made mistakes (and often has been); and no, sorry, I don't want to see the divorce storyline play out because we probably would've had to see either Eddie Bashing, Shannon Redemption, or Shannon turning up again like a cardboard cut out of a cartoon villain the way Eva did and I want to be witness to exactly zero of those things.

#the ghost ship answers questions #I...honestly don't know what to tag this as #I have thoughts about eddie and shannon's relationship #that are probably unpopular opinions #teal dear she's a shitty mom not a demon in a skin suit and a pretty yellow sundress #and I also don't like her for personal reasons #and eddie is not perfect but I wouldn't want him to be and like seeing him try to improve constantly #and also am personally predisposed to like single dads #also for personal reasons

[bookwyrminspiration]

(pyro here! this is very ramble-y so no obligation to read through, but im constantly thinking about the council and cant help myself)

im not sure how to start this, but there's a phrase from a song i like that i feel really describes the council, in a way? said phrase is "now, sympathy has no place in a righteous heart" and i feel like that just...really fits with the council as a whole, kinda?

im sorry for being a broken record at this point, but i find it endlessly fascinating how the council is more and more divorced from what you'd imagine them to be (in the earlier books you'd expect them to be good and kind bc Good Government but they're actually pretty horrible, and then in legacy they're actually working with the crew and are very much people, and then the oralie reveal that just sets you right back and the whole thing with kenric. just. yeah.)

like, they seem to think they're in the right, since because they're working to make their world better, but they definitely don't care about the fine details as long as everything is running smoothly on the surface (like how exillium and banishment is a thing that happens to children.) even if some are hurt by what they do, the council are still duty-bound to do what's needed to keep their people safe, and if they have to sacrifice a minority for what they think is the correct course of action, they won't be afraid to take it.

i think it's a neat detail. like, i dont think SM did it on purpose, but it's still cool to think about!

also the lyric is from the song comfort zone by ferry. sorry for the really rable-y ask with zero point to it though :|

pyro you need to stop apologizing for talking about the things that interest you /srs. You aren’t bothering me, it’s not too much. I genuinely love receiving your asks, and I love reading rambles /g (all of this is /nm and gentle btw)

you’re absolutely right, when you first start reading the books there’s this idea of ah yes, everything is perfect. Everything is working well. Including the government. They’re kind, benevolent, righteous leaders whose goodness spreads to the people and world and make it better. And then you look a little closer and see wait a minute, it’s all an illusion.

they make decisions that negatively affect the main character, they have no qualms with leaving a few out of the group to fend for themselves (exillium) for the sake of maintaining this illusion of perfection and protecting others. Good of the group is greater than that of the individual.

then Sophie starts working with them more closely and you see they’re really…human. (As in real people. I know they’re elves). They debate their decisions, they talk them out and consult others. They put things to a vote. They delegate tasks. Which in a way, can make it more horrifying because those decisions they made were intentional. It wasn’t just a backhanded “uh maybe do that and it’ll help,” it was a deliberate, conscious, agreed upon choice.

And maybe it reveals a skewed sense of right and wrong. They think they’re helping but really they’re just covering up problems that will fester beneath the surface. Or maybe the morality of their decisions is the further thing from their mind. They just want certain results and do whatever it takes to get them regardless of the implications. Sophie’s ability restrictor might be a good example of that. Locking away her powers and badly affecting the functioning of her body (with headaches and nausea) doesn’t matter to them. It’s not ideal, but not a dealbreaker. It got her to stop using her powers as long as she was wearing it, so it was worth it and the right decision to most of them. It fixed some of their interspecies problems too.

it probably wasn’t intentional, but it fascinating to think about the elven government. All the little details and things that were probably never even meant to be thought about but provide so much depth.

it’s a really interesting topic of conversation, so thank you for bringing it up!! I’m always down to talk about the council /g

#but seriously you have nothing to apologize for /g #I enjoy talking about this with you #I love taking apart the characters #and you always bring up several great points and perspectives and observations #it’s lovely to read /g #kotlc #keeper of the lost cities #kotlc council #kotlc fandom #quil’s queries #asks #nonsie #pyrokinetic-loser #I should make you your own tag huh #I wonder what it should be #long post

[helenaisbetterthansarah]

It’s a brain dump:

I don’t believe in religion (gasp). I don’t think/find it inherently bad, but it’s just not my thing. 🤷🏼‍♀️

I’m not really spiritual either…

BUT…these things and thought processes do FASCINATE me.

SOMETIMES…I find it fun/interesting to apply some of these things to my own experiences, as humans like to do.

The theory of twin flames…that one fascinates me as of recent.

The theory states that it’s not a soul, but a flame that matches you, Which is an idealized thing…BUT most I’ve heard as of recent that there’s more to this simplicity we get told.

That there are more flames out there that burn similar to us…and that the first one we tend to find that we THINK is our twin, is ACTUALLY our false twin. That we meet our false twin first bc that twin allows us to see within ourselves, what it is we should love about ourselves. That we all hate ourselves so much and that we need to learn to love ourselves before getting to actually meet our true twin, for if we met our true twin prior to our false, we would NEVER be able to burn with them. That we MUST learn to love ourselves FIRST, so that we may understand and ACCEPT the love from our true twin fully.

I LOVE this idea. SO much….and lately have found myself circling this whole concept.

Ugh. Love man….love is fascinating

#personal #love #brain dump

[br4inr0tx]

Hello! May I have a yandere JJBA (any part you see fit really) and Y! Obey me (all characters besides luke of course) matchups please? I am a 5'4 ace/heteromantic gemini girl ambivert.Dark brown hair(peuple tips)/eyes(glasses) a little chubby/muscled and pale skin+permanent smirk or b*itch face.Sassy sarcastic a little naive/innocent,calculative,protective,creative,expressive,,tsundere,manipulative,a devil's advocate,prideful,charismatic,smartass,bookworm,daydreamer,a little insensitive/blunt because I'm more on the logical side so I don't really understand or recognize emotions,vengeful,not very touchy,mischievous,a huge tease,open minded,very curious,gets annoyed easily,impatient so kind of a bad temper,observant but not romantically,sadistic to a point but I stop myself if it's a friend.Indifferent to most things,open minded,morally...unique,I hate injustice and fight for my beliefs,trust and family issues so I never talk about my problems.Rebellious,sneaky, but I'm a chaotic good and I love cats/laughter/pranks/dark humour. With my friends I am either laughing, goofing around or annoyed. Those who don't talk to me see me as a nerd aggressive smart and blunt person (maybe even prideful) and strangers as a polite sweetheart. I have some bad habits like biting my nails/lips bcs I am always nervous, disorganized room/sleep and eating schedule plus I am lazy. I don't understand a lot of references because I'm either too lazy to watch or I don't care/predictable. My style varies a lot (always comfy) but I never wear dresses heels/makeup. Thank you!

🌌

Greetings. Yet another person who basically is my twin in personality- never did I think people could have the same bluntness I have- lol. Anyways, to the matchups!

Your Yandere! Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure matchup is..Bruno Bucciarati !!

You gave off a more happier Abbacchio vibes in the sense that you can be blunt, therefore I gave you are lovely Bruno.

Bruno is conflicted with you. At first he thought you were someone with some trauma, but it seems like you were just that honest.

You pride though, and your ability to be honest really strikes his interest.

Your so tiny to him! So cute- he just wants to hold you close and run his hands through your hair..take in your sent.

It doesn’t matter what you look like, he loves you! He loves you- he loves you- he loves you!!

He silently wishes he could doll you up, even if you really don’t want to.

Bruno is a very giving-obsessive Yandere.

Every day he’ll present you with a new gift.

He sees you having leadership qualities, and that fills him with pride to let you sail.

Oh but trust me, Bruno is still in control.

He knows his way around the city, and knows how to provoke people. He’ll tell everyone to stay away from you, and once your alone, he simply has you in his hands. It’s a simple as that!

He’ll let you talk to Passione, but no flirting allowed. Not to mention, he’ll be right by your side.

He already told Passione to stay away from you, and really only speak with you if needed.

He’ll have you wrapped around his finger. He might give you the freedom of not kidnapping you, but if you feel eyes burning on you, it’s him.

If you talk to someone he thinks is a threat, he’ll tell you you shouldn’t talk to them. If you do it again, he has no choice but to eliminate them.

He’ll never put physical harm on you.

You might call him out on it, but that’s when he’ll confess to you. Please don’t turn him away..please?

Runners up!: Narancia Ghirga

Your Yandere! Obey Me! matchup is..Lucifer !!

He’s a obsessive yandere, and knows that he has all control over you.

Your pride strikes him as something unique. It’s not everyday you find someone with pride, and who’s honest.

Humans can be..quite pathetic to him to be honest. However, your different.

It doesn’t take him long to start leaving hints of his fascination with you. Roses, letting you into his office whenever. Hell, he might even Kabedon you. Meaning, if you don’t know, slam pinning you up against a wall to fluster you.

He’s not afraid if you call him out either.

“Is it terrible I have a fascination with you?”

As for his brothers, he’s throwing even more humiliation their way. He wants to show how stupid and pathetic they are, and that you should be with him. He doesn’t want to kill his brothers all to much..because he’ll get caught red handed, he’s sure. However, it might get his brothers to calm down.

When he says stay in your room, he really means it. Unlike Bruno, he’s not afraid to do harm on you. His favorites obviously being whips.

If you be to disobedient, he might even put a shock collar on you. You’re like a dog to him, until your fully trained to be his.

Any other demon besides his brothers is gone. No one is getting merely close to you. Not now, not ever.

Runners up!: Mammon

— coii

#openmatchups #yandere #yandere matchup #obey me matchups #Lucifer obey me #jjba #jjba part 5 #jjba golden wind #bruno bucciarati #yandere bruno Bucciarati #yandere lucifer

[aotopmha]

i hate rating things bc i find it somewhat shallow ? and most people i see doing that just put up a number and end it like that. i think stories deserve discussions and i love that your blog has brought up so many interesting points while reading aot. my favorite characters ended up being mikasa, gabi, ymir (freckled one) and levi! never been a fan of eren post-timeskip (i really loved 15yo eren lol) but i think his development and his journey has been one of the best things from this series.

Thank you for the kind words!

Yeah, I feel like number ratings kind of say nothing, too.

Especially with longer stuff, too. It was all critical discussion consisted of back in the early 2000s.

I remember I used to rank all of the One Piece arcs all the time when I first discovered online discussion.

But as times have gone on, the video essay format has become more popular and I think with good reason.

Stories just have so much more to them and writing a small paragraph often just encompasses a very small picture of the entire story.

There are often many things to talk about with even the worst stories.

Number ratings are an even more minimal version of that.

At least a good short review still tells you the good and bad parts. A number or rating is much more obtuse and sort of mechanical.

I love this new trend of just talking about stuff.

Just to give my two cents on those characters!

I think Mikasa and freckled Ymir at least make my top 10, but again, I'm not that big on really ranking stuff, either. It's just stuff I love or like or hate or find okay.

I think Mikasa is among the top half of characters, but what's holding back her character for me is that in the end the main thing about her character is her relationship with Eren.

She does have other relationships and character development elements, but a really overwhelming part of her character is about her relationship with Eren.

It's a interesting and complex relationship and I love that the masculine elements of her character remain in place up till the end.

She's sort of like a genderbend of the seasoned warrior archetype who ends up losing their loved one by the end.

If you made Mikasa a guy, this would be a fairly typical end for a story like this and this is the end some people actually wanted for Eren, even. The warrior who lost everything in their strife-driven life and now wanders in solitude, never really being able to move on from their traumas.

But it pulls a twist here, too because Mikasa is not alone. She can grieve and she can move forward.

In fact, I think the story pulled this on a smaller scale for Levi and Petra and his squad.

It's pretty interesting to think about.

Freckled Ymir is super great during the time she's there. I love her. But I'm bummed we basically got nothing on Historia's side by the end. Historia's character became a mess the moment her pregnancy happened, but I think the story could've still addressed the relationship in some way by the end. Even like a hint of her letter still being there in her drawer or something. We basically got nothing after Historia first read the letter and I think that ending pushes her a little bit down on my list. I'm fine with her giving her life for Historia in a naive way (in the end her decision mirrors how all of the Marley warriors try to please the corrupt system to get a positive result when it actually makes things worse), but I wanted just a little bit more closure for her.

I ended up finding Levi okay, myself. I think he's Mikasa except less interesting because his relationships with any of the other vets isn't nearly as complex and nothing all that interesting is done with his backstory/archetype I haven't really seen before. It's executed just fine, but I think there just isn't as much spice to him as many other characters.

Speaking of spice, I think Eren is the definition of spice. Everything he does contributes to making situations and struggles more complicated and to never keep the story in a status quo.

I can see not liking or just being sad or angry about where Eren's character went, but I too find his character journey endlessly fascinating. In the end he ends up being selfish in a selfless way where he would give anything for his friends to live.

He doesn't do this only for himself or to feel better about himself or anything like that. He truly wants everyone he cares about to be safe, but he's also single-minded and only has limited knowledge to go off of; he is willing to destroy literally everyone else just for everyone he loves to be okay and get their long lives.

He is being selfless to the point of being self-destructive, but on a pretty limited scale.

I've seen the read around that in the end he is just being selfish all around and is confused on what he actually wants, but I think his love and concern are honest.

I think him being purely selfish would remove all of the complexity from this situation just as much as him being purely selfless.

I think a lot of people are mindscrewed by the idea that someone would do something so horrible for selfless reasons, which is why all of those simple reads exist and I think this will forever be the best aspect of post-ts Eren to me.

People can do horrible things for very honest and selfless reasons. They don't have to lie to themselves. They don't have to have some kind of complex webbing of delusions.

Eren just wanted to save Paradis from being razed to the ground because that's where he grew up and where his friends live, too.

In fact, I think everyone does this. In an emergency people are not going to be concerned with people they care about less. They will generally go looking and helping those they care about the most: family or friends or even just ourselves. Stuff like the story with Kaya's mom does happen.

I think this aspect of human nature is just blown up to a massive scale for the purposes of this narrative with Eren and other moments in the story (like Reiner running when Marcel dies, too, for example). Eren did a pretty great thing for his friends by giving them their life back. I think anyone would be grateful. This is why we have the second half of the chapter highlighting the bad parts of what he did and sort of bringing things back to Earth.

Thank you for the ask!

#Attack on Titan #Shingeki no Kyojin #Eren #Mikasa #Ymir #Levi #Eren Jaeger #Eren Yeager #Mikasa Ackermann #Levi Ackermann #AoT #SnK #Asks