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nariism · 4 months

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*ੈ✩ LAST WORDS OF A SHOOTING STAR

pair. itadori yuji x reader

synopsis. in the 3 days following the shibuya incident, itadori yuji emerges as a husk of his former self. with his immediate execution resumed, you both grapple with the feelings you have for each other and come to terms with his impending death.

content. hurt/comfort (lots of comfort, thank art because i was gonna be mean about this and they convinced me not to), slightly canon divergent (taking place between shibuya and the culling games), fluff and minor angst, yuta is the best wingman

wc. ~4.4k

NOVEMBER 1 2018

You imagine that your face was rather ghastly when you received the news.

"Execution?" You repeated, the word tasting bitter on your tongue. No, that was the wrong description. It tasted of death—like iron and the depths of Hell filling your mouth until you were gurgling on it.

Unlike the rest of the Jujutsu Sorcerers from Tokyo, you had been ordered to stay back with Shoko in case of an emergency. You remember your exile from battle had left a similar rotten flavour in your mouth.

You vanished off the face of the earth after the incident was over. Most probably presumed you died in the aftermath. Devoured by a curse, they would say and shake their heads. You were always troublesome. And then they would move on with the rest of the world, all the same.

Lives were only temporary in the world of curses. Focus on who you can save, not who is already gone. They'll only end up a curse in your sleep. What a horrible notion to have.

The truth is that you'd been whisked away with Yuta, who seemed to be scheming a plan of his own. Perhaps as a middle finger to the higher ups he hated so much, or perhaps just for his own selfish reasons. You wouldn't know until he was finished carrying it through—he's too good at keeping secrets.

He wanted your reverse cursed technique, you knew that much for sure, even though he could do it himself. You were useful by his side, fitting into his plot in a way you could not in Shibuya. Feeling some sort of obligation and satisfaction, you followed him like a lost puppy.

And now here you are, seated by a dimming fire in the abandoned part of the city. Yuta was too clever for his own good. You suppose Gojo taught him some things well. This was their plan after all.

Yuji was safe, if only for this moment in time.

"Now with Gojo gone, it would have been easy for the higher ups to send assassins your way."

Ruthless and truthful, you flinch, but Yuji does not. He remains perfectly still in your hold, with your hands rotating his face around to get a better look at his wounds. You pour your cursed energy into him, hoping to breathe life back into his eyes, but they stay dull and empty.

"We'll find a way to stop this," you assure, reaching over to take a sanitizing wipe to clean an open cut. Yuta was too rough on him, but it was at least believable that Yuji was dead. He doesn't even recoil from the alcohol stinging his flesh, too engrossed in his own thoughts.

"Why?" He asks weakly. You gawk at him, but then it melts away into a softness that finally makes him blink up at you. "I'm evil."

"You're not evil, Yuji."

"I am. I killed those people. I did." His voice comes flat and defeated, nothing like the one you used to listen to over dinner while he reenacted shitty western films.

You never realize what you'll miss until it's gone. It's hollow, the ache in your heart.

"You don't understand. How could you? All this blood on my hands—"

"It was Sukuna," you quickly refute.

"And Sukuna only lives because I do!"

His voice raises at you, causing the flames behind you to flicker and crack. It's enough for Yuta to step in, acting as a barrier between your tense bodies. Yuji seems to shrink at this, realizing his emotions have run amok and that he has yelled at you.

You only stare back at him in bewilderment, like a frightened animal. Your upperclassman shakes his head.

"Enough of this. We need to start making plans."

You lay awake that night, alone and anxious. Yuta has taken the first shift of watching and patrolling while the two of you rest, though hesitant to leave you alone. He told you it’s another reason he dragged you along: having three people to rotate shifts instead of just two would be easier on your bodies and minds. The city is not what it used to be, now overrun with curses of all grades.

You reassured him it would be fine, that you would fall asleep quickly and so would Yuji—his body has to run out of steam eventually, right? Oh, what a fool you were.

The tension is so heavy that it's awkward, even though you're sleeping on opposite ends of the tunnel.

"Sleep," you demand as if you were Inumaki, like you have the power to curse him.

His eyes flutter open. Even in the firelight, you don't see any shine in them, seeming as if they had been extinguished of life. "Why don't you?"

"I can't until you do."

"That's stupid," he tells you.

It's not the first time you've argued like this. Back when the world felt right, you would sneak in through his dorm window well into the hours of the night. Platonic, you had convinced yourself. You snuck into his bed seeking companionship as a friend. That's the lie you gorged on.

A piece of you knew, and you're sure he did too, that the way your hands explored his arms was unnatural for two friends, and that friends wouldn't sneak into each other's rooms like this with such severe punishment on the line.

It was safe in his arms, with the dull hum of his television running an old horror film in the background. You didn't have to think about much other than his warmth when you sat between his legs with your back to his chest. Or when his arm was draped over your shoulder and you were pressed into his side—actually, you think you preferred this one though you felt sorry for his sore arm.

You would bicker about dumb, pointless things. Which movie is better, or which character deserved to be mutilated more. It would go on for so long that Megumi would bang his fist on their shared wall to get the two of you to shut up.

There was no curse strong enough to change time itself, so you keep your thoughts and memories to yourself when you respond.

"You'll be too tired to function on your shift," you reason.

"You both will be fine without me." Better off without me, you know he means. You've gotten good at reading between his lines.

You slowly sit up in your sleeping bag, eyes never leaving Yuji. He seems so frail right now, even though he looks more adult than he ever has before.

"Human Earthworm 4 was better than 2," you suddenly say. His eyes peer open again in confusion.

"Huh? 2 was way better."

"I liked the love story in 4," you argue, slowly getting out of your bag to shuffle to his side of the concrete tunnel. He looks at you as if you've said something outlandish, too preoccupied with his thoughts to wonder why you've come so close.

"2 had the best special effects though."

Your body shifts under his blanket.

"But 4 had a happier ending." (As far as 'happy' goes in the Human Earthworm series, at least.)

His arm falls around your waist as it has a hundred times, pulling you into his chest.

"Whatever," he huffs. The next topic comes fast and you're thrown into a full blown conversation with him. If you concentrate enough, you can imagine your bodies being tangled together in his bed, safe and sound.

Concrete and fire and the stench of curses melt away until he's all you can focus on.

"You have weird taste in movies," he concludes with his eyes drifting shut.

NOVEMBER 2 2018

You think you know how to fix broken people until you find that they are more than skin and bones.

You learn one thing after the Shibuya Incident: there are wounds residing within Yuji just as much as there are marking his flesh.

Yuta, you realize, had left the two of you alone to sleep and has protected you all night. You'll make it up to him, you reason. Yuji deserved to sleep.

When you wake up to his sleeping face, you think his cuts are healing nicely. But then his expression twists up in terror—a nightmare, if he even had enough energy left in him to conjure up dreams. He murmurs in his sleep, shakes his head a few times and thrashes around so much you're surprised you slept through the night by his side.

"Sukuna," he's whispering. Sukuna, Sukuna, Sukuna. King of Curses. The second voice tormenting him that lives in his own brain like a parasite. You bury yourself into his chest and hold him as tight as you can. He relaxes, body releasing its rigid form, but the murmurs continue.

He is shattered beyond repair. No amount of cursed energy could fix that, even if you tried.

You had once watched Yuji electrocute himself trying to set up the janky old television in his dorm room.

He fell back onto the floor with a loud crash, head hitting the wood so hard you thought he might have a concussion. It caused such a racket that Megumi came running into the room asking what happened, demon dog ready behind him in case of an ambush.

You rushed to the floor, discarding all the food you had settled in your lap and crumbled beside him to scoop him into your arms.

"Yuji!" You called him. People rarely used his first name. You felt special, like you knew him better than others did and for some reason that was a privilege. "Are you okay?"

He laughed in your arms, seeming unfazed by the fact that electricity had run through every vein in his body. "I'm fine, see? My finger just slipped."

You and Megumi both sighed in relief, though you always thought it was strange when you reflected on it. Yuji was a funny guy, yes. He was equal parts humour and destruction but not a klutz. Mistakes happen, so you let it slide until now, but some part of you was nagging to ask.

"That day," you start while rolling up your sleeping bag. "You electrocuted yourself. Remember?"

He looks at you funny over his shoulder. Yuta has already started cracking open cans of food for breakfast, embers of your dead fire cracking.

"Hmm, yeah. I remember. Why?"

"I just thought..." you trail off. "Well, Sukuna makes you tough to a lot of things. I'm surprised small electric shocks aren't one of them."

Sukuna. A name you'd been avoiding since this morning. Sickening silence settles between you. It's so heavy that you pause in your cleaning to look at him, brow raised.

"Yeah," he coughs. "Well, maybe I exaggerated."

"Huh?" You sound annoyed now. "You scared us half to death!"

Yuji only falters in his own chores. When he looks at you again, there's a longing in his gaze that you don't know how you could have missed. Or perhaps it was never there until now.

"It was nice to have you fawning over me," he admits.

The day goes on and all you feel is a terrible grief.

You become painfully aware of each millimeter the sun glides across the sky, from one horizon to the other. Time slips through your fingers fast as sand.

Horrifically, you can't find anything to talk about to fill the emptiness—Nobara and Megumi feel off the table considering the extent of their injuries. You don't even dare to breathe Gojo's name, let alone speak of him so boldly as Yuta is.

You're afraid that Yuji will spiral again, confused and unwilling to cooperate with his judgement clouded by loss. It's not your fault, you would say. It is, he would argue. It would do neither of you good, so you idle around while he and Yuta devise plans to tiptoe around the higher ups.

A part of you knows that if either of you told him to submit and die, he would. He's already teetering on the edge of self-destruction.

On the outside, he seems perfectly indifferent. Gaze steady, face stone and unchanging as he speaks. He's doomed, ill-fated, someone full of misfortune. He looks so lonely that the air itself parts for him where he stands.

To shoulder so much responsibility, so much death, maybe he truly is alone. Some fraction of him, at least—a piece of himself only he would ever understand.

Your hand snakes into his without a second thought. You don't know why you did it, nor do you have any reasoning that he doesn't yank away from you. His hand trembles, and it's then that you realize his whole body is wracked with tremors that don't match his distant disposition.

The second thing you learn is this: when Yuji self-destructs, he does it from the inside-out.

Itadori Yuji loves chocolate cake.

He loves all food, really, acting like your friend group's personal food dumpster whenever any of you were full. But chocolate cake you knew he had a sweet tooth for.

You used to bring it with you to his dorm, stopping by the convenience stores on the way home to grab a pre-packaged slice from the fridge for him to eat.

"You're making a mess," you would tell him with a frown, using your thumb to wipe up frosting from the corner of his mouth. You would lick the pad of your finger clean after that, and he would watch almost in a trance.

It's the reason why you stop on one of your patrols, poking through the fridge section of a convenience store. The power has been out for a long time in this part of the city, all the food is already room temperature, but you figure this is fine as long as it smells okay.

The way Yuji's face lights up when he sees you is all it takes for the worry to go away.

It briefly feels as though nothing has ever gone wrong—that after this slice of cake the two of you will tumble back onto his mattress and turn on another showing of Titanic. (He groaned about it once, saying he got KO'd too many times during this film. You only laughed in confusion.)

At the end of the day, you know those days will never come back to you, lost forever in the wind.

Fire dances before you and you watch, enchanted by the flames. You remember last night, how not even the firelight could make Yuji look the same as he did before. You turn your head to look at him, to see if it's any different tonight, just for your cheek to be caught in his palm.

His thumb traces your lip, the way you used to do to him. You recognize the pull of his finger against your flesh, the swipe of it to get frosting off, but he still seems dissatisfied.

"What?" You ask.

"It didn't come off," he mutters, leaning in dangerously close to observe. Heat rises all the way to your cheeks and makes your hairs stand on end. His touch is like molten lava. You wonder if it has something to do with the monster living inside of him.

"I can't see it," you whine without a mirror.

He draws a little closer, until he's inches from your face. "Let me..."

You've suddenly been dropped into cold, unknown waters. This is all unfamiliar. He's rushing this, as if making up for all the time the two of you lost pretending you were only friends. As if he can cram all the things he's wanted to tell you into one night.

Recoiling away, you find yourself hesitating. If he kisses you, this all becomes too real. It's an acknowledgment of his impending death. That the thread of his life is finer and further stretched than yours is.

An unpleasant thought rings through your mind. What if I become a curse on him?

"This only ends badly for us," you whisper, but the conviction is missing from your voice.

He doesn't care. At least, it doesn't look like he does. Who knows what he's thinking right now?

"Who cares?" He says. "We're Jujutsu Sorcerers. Everything bad happens to us no matter what."

You don't have any rebuttal to that, no argument that forms in your mind that could challenge his words. He was right. Only disaster befalls Sorcerers. Disaster and grief.

For a while you had forgotten, living these idyllic months watching the days pass by. You feel like you wasted that precious time worrying about stupid things, like what to have for breakfast or what kind of snacks you should pick up for movie night.

(It ended up being popcorn every time. He liked to piss off Sukuna with it, saying the King of Curses would never get to experience the pleasure of picking out kernels from his teeth. You scoffed but bought it anyway.)

Another thought crosses your mind: Yuji is more fit to be in a rom-com, or a television series where the good guys always win. Not this tragedy. Not this massacre.

You wonder if he's ever felt the same way. If he ever wished he could reach into the sky and turn the sun back to a time before he even knew what a curse was.

If you’d met each other under different circumstances, would this have been a different story? The thought makes your heart ache, a part of you so deep that even if you reached into your chest and plucked it, you'd still wail.

"Can I?" He asks you, eager but quiet. Had this been a few months ago, you imagine that he would have had this spark in his eye. That his lips would be crashing into yours with no inhibition.

But Yuji has always been selfless, you think he always will be. He doesn't want to drag you down if you don't want to—an out, they call it. An escape route just before he careens into a ditch.

Hope has drained from every inch of his expression. This is his loneliness talking.

Despite the dread that licks up your spine, you cup his face. You swear he jolts slightly beneath your touch, as if you've reached out to strike him down. A retribution he believes he deserves.

He kisses you like it's his last day on earth.

You learn one last thing: Itadori Yuji tastes familiarly of death.

Yuta decides to leave you alone for a second night in a row. His presence is so crushing that you know he's alive, but he stalks off somewhere else, leaving just you and Yuji huddled by the pitiful fire you've built.

He once claimed himself jokingly to be a love expert, and then ran off to Kenya for so long that you lost track of how much time passed. You wish you'd asked him before he left what he meant, but at the time it seemed irrelevant. Insignificant. The name Itadori Yuji had not yet been impressed into your heart like a seal.

You're busy setting up the sleeping bags, this time pushing them flush together. They're so close you can barely see the seam between them. Yuji stands on the other side of the fire, watching.

It reminds him of all the times you'd ever scolded him for not making his bed in the morning. I'm gonna crawl back in tonight anyway, he said. Who cares if it's messy?

Idiot, you would call him. But there was no malice behind it. He treated it like a pet name, a badge of honour to be your idiot.

Life felt so simple back then. He was full of determination and life and stuck to his morals as best he could. When he wavered he would text you to come over so you could fall asleep on his chest and suffocate any other thoughts out of his head.

"I've never felt so powerful before," he admits quietly. You turn to look at him, curious. "Like I could do anything in the world."

There's a negative connotation to that, you know. He could do anything. The world would crumble at his feet and there he would stand, laughing at it all. It isn't his will, not even slightly, but the demon taking refuge in his body would love to see the blood pool.

"Like I could just... reach out and—"

"Yuji!" You hiss, lurching forward to take his hand into yours and retreat from the flame. The skin is already pink and blistering, scorched by the embers. You twist his wrist around, observing where the fire licked the deepest, and pour your energy into him.

When you look up to see if he's crying, or at least grimacing in pain, you find only his smiling face—warm and adoring. For a second it feels like the world isn't burning around you.

It was nice to have you fawning over me.

You wipe that stupid smirk off his face, leaning in to smear a kiss along the scar on his lip.

"Idiot," you say, and he laughs for the first time in so long that it sounds foreign in your ears.

(He doesn't fall asleep that night. He would rather savour the sound of your soft snores, memorize the form of your body in his hold, and try his hardest to burn this into his brain.

So be it if you come to curse him one day. He would welcome you with open arms.)

NOVEMBER 3 2018

The day comes when Megumi sneaks into your hideout, asking for help.

His sister, he explains. He needs help saving Tsumiki. For some reason, resentment boils in your stomach, but then it's snuffed just as fast.

Two days and two nights you've spent pretending Japan isn't collapsing, content with sitting idly by as curses overran Tokyo. You're sure Megumi thought you to be cowards, that you were all hiding under this bridge to wait out the hellstorm that was raining down on your homes.

It was true to some extent. Once Yuji stepped out into battle again, that was that. You're not sure things would ever be the same again, though you suppose you lost the privilege of routine days ago.

"Let me come too," you urge. Three pairs of eyes land on you.

"No," Yuji pushes. "It's dangerous."

"I can fight!"

"You can't," he pauses, then corrects himself, "You won't."

Awkward silence settles over your encampment. Yuta stirs, standing to hold you steady by the shoulders.

"If we need help... if one of us is hurt, we'll need you unharmed. Do you understand?"

Ah, ever so wise, your upperclassman. So easy to persuade you. There's a reason why he's the chosen one only second to Gojo.

You swallow the bile that fights up your throat. "What if you don't come back?"

Yuji steps in this time, knocking away Yuta to hold you by the face. Get a grip, this means. Pull yourself together, don't you dare fall apart in front of me.

"We will."

You once considered telling him how you felt, letting it eat away at you until Nobara groaned in disgust.

“If Itadori starts dating before I do, I’ll puke.”

You remember that you laughed, thinking she was so dramatic. You loved that about her. “I think you would do worse.”

She glared at you, foot lightly kicking at your shin under the table. Still, she made sure to push equal amounts of rice to your side of the plate. “I might burn a village down,” she huffed, placing her chin on her palm.

“You’re fine. Even if I told him how I feel, I don’t think he’d accept.”

“Huh?” Nobara sounded genuinely confused, raising a brow at you. “What makes you think that?”

You didn't know how to answer that. Maybe you were just afraid that you had misinterpreted everything, that the way he held you was protective in a familial manner and that he would slam his door in your face when you tried.

Looking back on it, you can imagine him in the next room ranting about the same things to Megumi.

“He still has posters of Jennifer Lawrence on his wall,” you argued weakly while shoveling rice into your spoon. She watched you take your bite with her lips parted in disbelief.

You wish you had told him, then. Not that it would have changed where you both ended up.

You watch as they pack up their things.

Megumi's demon dog keeps you quiet company, tail thrashing against the ground as you slick back its fur. They talk around the dying flames, devising plan after plan. None seem safe. None would be.

Yuta and Megumi leave first, taking the lead in front of the pack. His dog melts into the shadows and disappears, leaving you sitting alone.

"I want to take you back, but..." Yuji glances over his shoulder toward his death sentence. "Will you make it okay on your own?"

You get up slowly, as if to draw out the time he stands before you. A thousand questions run through your head: what if you never see him again? What if this kills him, not by body, but by his already damaged soul?

He must sense the racing of your mind, so he leans in to engulf you in his arms. In an instant, memories of those days spent lounging in his bed, shoveling your food onto his plate, and purposefully talking louder to tease Megumi come flooding.

A year you would never forget. You're sure it'll become a curse if you dwell, so you tell him: "I'll make it. You go on, they need you."

I need you, too. Stay. If only it were so simple.

He smiles at you, warm like the sun that's hidden behind the barrier. Itadori Yuji looks like a ghost of his former self, battle-worn and covered in scars where his skin used to be smooth. He kisses you again for good measure, making sure he remembers the way you sigh into his mouth.

When he pulls away, there's life gleaming in his eyes.

"Let's watch Human Earthworm 5 when I come back."

Your thumb brushes the corner of his lip. You open your mouth to speak, to finally tell him the truth after all this time. You'd rather not die regretting you never said it, after all.

But you stop.

"I prefer Titanic," you confess. He shakes his head and kisses your forehead. Then he’s gone, taking all the warmth with him.

You'll make up for lost time one day. It won’t be today. You can tell him all about your feelings when he comes back to you.

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radiant-reid · 9 months

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Angel

Summary: Based on 14x09 where BAU!Reader recounts how working the case reminded her of Spencer's addiction

a/n: tbh this is trash, just trying to get some motivation back

Pairing: Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader (Fluff)

Content Warning: references to Spencer's Dilaudid addiction

Word Count: 1.1k

Masterlist | Navigation

There are flowers on the table.

That's the first thing Y/n notices and the only thing out of place in their otherwise tidy house. Spencer's always been a clean person.

The kid clutter- books, coloring pens, tiny shoes, the occasional Lego figure- that clutter, he's proud of.

Next to the vase is a bowl of pasta in a tomato-based sauce, and she guesses because of that, there's at least one child-size shirt soaking in the laundry with a stain on it.

"Hey, beautiful." Spencer makes her jump with his silent footsteps, followed by sudden voice. He touches her shoulders, massaging them softly.

She turns around, placing a quick kiss on his lips. "Hey. Missed you."

He pulls her forward, resting his head on top of hers. "Missed you too. Glad you made it back safe."

Things are different since the bureau mandated Spencer take time off as part of his reinstatement after prison. After the births of their three kids, Y/n stayed home, naturally, on maternity leave while Spencer continued going out on cases with the team. In between, and for most of their relationship and marriage, they worked at the BAU, spending almost every minute together. But this is different. Now, Spencer's the one that spends more time in DC, and in his 30 days not working at the BAU, he does an excellent job as a househusband.

Y/n pulls back, admiring his features for the first time in days."Sleeping angels?" She checks.

He scoffs lightly. "Not so much." She raises her eyebrows, humored. "Water, bathroom, another story, you know how it goes."

She chuckles. "Oh, yeah, I've heard that song before."

"Love them, though." He adds. "Are you hungry?"

"Starving." She turns to the delicious-smelling pasts on the table while his hands stay on her waist. Spencer's learned a lot while being a dad but his learning to cook has been very rewarding for her.

They move to the couch, needing to be closer than they would be if they were sitting at the table.

Her smile dimmers after she's complimented his cooking, and he's called her beautiful again. It's an easy difference in demeanor to spot for Spencer as a husband rather than a profiler.

"The case?" Spencer guesses.

Y/n takes a deep breath in and shrugs. "One like that wouldn't get to me usually." She tries to dismiss her feelings.

He catches it, having used the same technique many times. If it's bothering her, they're going to discuss it. "It was Tara's ex-husband that discovered a pattern?"

"Mm-hmm, uh, Daryl, he brought it to her, thinking there was an angel of death unsub killing people in the recovery community." She recaps, although he already knows from their discussion on the phone.

Technically, he's only allowed to know the basic details, not offer advice, but as long as Emily doesn't officially know that the occasional case-solving tip comes from Spencer, it's okay.

"What was his vice?" He asks.

Tara didn't want to spill all the details, but Y/n had made a few assumptions. "Alcohol, drugs later, I think."

"So why was this one more difficult than usual?" Spencer asks, frowning then it hits him. "Oh."

Y/n feels a pang of guilt in her chest at Spencer's expression contorting. "No, I don't mean-" She pauses, not knowing what to say. Neither can deny that her feelings are connected to what Spencer went through.

"Comparing the victims to me?" He guesses again.

Her selfishness feels even worse than her guilt. "No. Tara had to give a heart-wrenching speech. And we were in very different situations, her and Douglas and you and I, but it made me think about that time." She tries to explain it.

Spencer understands, and he nods solemnly. "We never talk about that in relation to you." He realizes that it's something he feels guilty about.

"I don't like to talk about it." She shrugs. "Just hearing what Tara said struck a chord." She could feel Tara's pain through Emily's repeated words, and it was all too easy to remember the heartbreak of seeing someone she loved struggling.

Spencer takes her hand, squeezing it lightly. "We can talk about it whenever you want, you know?"

"Not now." She shakes her head. "I missed you."

He smiles softly, resting against the couch and spreading his arms out. Y/n rests her legs over his and tucks herself under his arm. "I missed you too." He kisses her forehead and holds her closer. Things feel better when they're all under one roof. "Y/n, it's really important to me that you know how much I appreciate you staying through that. You're an angel, you know?"

"Spence." She coos, touching his cheek softly and momentarily getting caught in his eyes. "It wasn't a hard choice to stay with you and support you through that. I love you, and I'll always be here for you."

He takes a deep breath in. "I love you too. I could talk about how grateful I am for you forever, you know?"

"I know." She laughs lightly, having heard those speeches from him more than once. It never gets less heartwarming.

Spencer shuffles slightly, reaching out to take something off the coffee table. She raises her eyebrows until a look of recognition takes over her features.

"A photo album?" She asks curiously. "Why's that out here?"

"It's our first." He explains as he opens it, tracing his finger over the cover page. "Tillie wanted to see it." He finds the page he's looking for, showing her a photo of them.

Y/n grins, looking at it, remembering the exact second it was taken. "You look so little." She coos, touching the glossy picture of them. They're not much older than 25, fresh-faced, innocent, and dressed nicely. Spencer's smiling the adorable smile he still smiles today. It's stayed the same through every challenge they've faced.

"You've always been so beautiful." He mumbles, stroking her hair with his spare hand.

Her cheeks heat as she taps him on the shoulder. "Stop." She whines.

"Never." He shakes his head. "You're gorgeous, and I'm going to make sure you know it. I have no idea how I got so lucky."

She chuckles, shaking her head. "I'm the one that got lucky, marrying a genius."

"I married a genius too," Spencer claims, and he pulls her even closer to him like there's any chance she wants to move.

"Can we just sit here a while?" She asks as she relaxes more into him.

He leans down to kiss her forehead. "For as long as you want, angel."

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m1ssunderstanding · 2 months

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Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 1.4

Oh, John. It's hard because I'm like “fame was not good for that man” but I'm also like “he would've gone crazy with self-loathing if he didn't have the fame.”

John and Paul start to answer a question at the same time. John: no, go on, you can say it. They're seriously so married.

John's schoolboy flirting is cute, but what's more noteworthy to me is a) how happy Paul is to be shoved and b) how he instantly leans back into John. It's like they're bungeed together or something.

John gets me. Look how much he loves Paul bringing out the forced confidence shield to protect him. He's so in love. So turned on.

Here's my question about the death threats. Did the other Beatles actually receive them and tell Brian about them and keep them from John? Because that would be incredibly sweet and noble of them, but also, in that case, surely John received death threats too. Meaning he just didn't care about his own life and assumed the others were being left out of it because they hadn't actually said they were bigger than Jesus. Or did they have people filtering all their mail by that point? And Brian had been keeping the death threats from all of them? Because that could be interpreted as both protective and selfish of him. Does anyone know?

Again. I just love how Paul goes to bat for John over and over during this tour. Batting his eyes and playing with his hair and shouting down any and all criticism of John speaking his mind.

This moment is so telling to me. An interviewer who was up front at several concerts points out the looks and smiles between John and Paul which you can only see from the front and asks, “is it really that much fun every time?” The easy answer is, “Yeah. We like what we do. It's fun!” But Paul gets cagey. “Oh well the thing is you know with things like that it's probably…” and he makes up a bullshit story about messing up on a song they haven't performed in a year. Why do that if you don't have something to hide? (Even if you're subconsciously hiding) That right there is a tip-off for me that they're not normal about each other.

Interviewer: are you guys breaking up? John, immediately and emphatically: No. Paul: "Depends what you mean by breaking up, you know . . . Because we can't go on forever like this, so we've got to think now and prepare for, you know, if it did happen. The time has come for us to break up, but we've realized the possibility . . . Of breaking up as a natural progression." Literally shut the fuck up right now, you're going to give John an aneurysm.

I understand. I know. I don't relate to Paul much but I do relate to his hyperactivity and his avoidant attachment. I make sure constantly that I'll be okay when all my relationships end. But you don't talk about that in front of the other person. Especially someone like John whose worst fear is being left. Come on. Think.

See, now look what you did, Paul. Here's John's answer the next time they're asked about breaking up.

And yeah, the klan being the ones to “stand up against the Beatles blasphemy” really proves my point from the last post I think. It's just masked racism.

It actually seems like Paul's more vocally political at this point in time than John is. I wonder what happened to change that? Was it just the influence of their respective wives? Was it just easier for them to play up the roles they'd been assigned for the most part?

Okay on this round of “are you breaking up” they look at each other first before they answer and then Paul goes “all together probably.” I wonder if they talked about their previous answers together and admitted – however cautiously or however veiled – that hearing the other say they might leave hadn't been fun. Who knows, honestly.

Paul and John often talk about making a radio show together apparently. Gosh if only they could've done that now. I'd make them my token white boy podcast. It'd be great. They'd be so lame and so adorable and they'd talk about recipes and politics and they'd gossip and rank other people's music. But anyway, what really gets me is the often bit. So they really did plan their post-beatle future together. Enough that it was a frequent topic of discussion between them. They planned to be together forever.

Ugh it always guts me that Paul brought a girlfriend to Paris with him to meet up with John.

Okay my tin hat is glued to my head for this but. But. Hear me out alright? So John starts filming on 09/19/66. He's there for 6 &½ weeks. Putting the end at the beginning of November, right when Paul goes in disguise and alone to Paris. Do we have tabs on John for those dates? John just talked about going around Paris in disguise. What if they met up by themselves and in secret? What then?

No fucking wonder John was exhausted with him. Damn. He takes a month and a half to write strawberry fields, shows it to Paul, then...

Interviewer: the songwriting team will keep going whatever happens will it? John: yeah, we'll probably carry on writing music Forever. It's just so ‘Obviously. Might as well ask me if the sun's going to come up tomorrow.’

His friend – try dangerous drugs with and take home to daddy type “friend” – just died brutally and suddenly two days ago, and this is what he looks like and talks like and he's going in to work like it's nothing. I just. Compare that to John talking about Brian's death? Obviously two very different relationships but still… Paul's upbringing really fucked him up so hard. He thinks he's not allowed to be human. What can I say? It's a drag.

AKA the happiest 6 months of John and Paul's lives.

I find it fascinating that Paul alone is asked to compose and record what would eventually become the carnival of light and that he just went ahead and included everyone in that. Really makes me wonder if he got a vibe off John that him doing the family way alone was hurtful or if they maybe even talked about it? Or maybe he just didn't like doing the family way without John.

Actually quite a lovely, forward-thinking, humble speech. Imagine being John, though. Watching that from home like “why the fuck is he philosophizing to the world without me?” Because you know John shares all those sentiments and might even have got there first. It would be infuriating.

“A lucky man who made the grade” is an interesting way to describe Tara and I can't help but wonder if it has anything to do with Tara being cool enough for Paul to associate with him. And Paul is many things but stupid is not one of them. He's going to at the very least wonder if this verse is about John laughing at his friend's death. Right? Like I know Paul's the repression CEO but seriously I don't think even he is that good.

Maybe that Leopold and Leob quote isn't just about tearing people down verbally. Maybe Wooler genuinely got a vibe of a sense of superiority and therefore lack of empathy with Lennon/McCartney.

I mean he really does sound like he's describing sex though, doesn't he? Emotional, loving, romantic sex. Followed immediately by Paul's “I'd love to turn you on” lyrics and the “down with pants” and “sword swallower” pins. Alrighty then.

What I would call my Beatles bio after watching this. "They Touched Dicks: The Only Logical Conclusion."

#paul mccartney #the beatles #john lennon #mclennon #ringo starr #george harrison #understanding lennon mccartney #ulm

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rie-092 · 2 years

Note

Okay, so I don't know if you currently have your request tray open, and if that's the case, I'd like a platonic or romantic Yandere from our lazy, cale henituse. And if you're uncomfortable, I'll settle for another character, regis elen floyen. Thanks and good day/afternoon/evening [I hope you don't ignore me like others, but I understand if you choose that].

PRECIOUS LADY

❲ yandere! cale henituse x female! reader ❳

summary : everyone in the whole continent knows how much cale henituse treasures his precious lady.

tw : yandere behavior, unhealthy obsession, manipulation, violence (?) , possessiveness

let's be honest here. cale henituse is a smart yet kinda dense guy. and to be honest, he took a while before he realized his kinda unhealthy obsession and love for you.

as a yandere, cale henituse was pretty chill. he trusts you. and besides, you won't be able to leave him since his family/friends won't allow you.

there were some times that cale can be pretty clingy. like those times that he would hug you out of nowhere. and you, being a sweetheart you are. you would just laugh it off and pat his head.

cale henituse can also be manipulative. this guy was a great scammer manipulator. manipulating you into thinking that you are the wrong one here is so easy for him.

he also had some odd habits of buying your dress, jewelry, and hair accessories that had the same color as his hair.

he might be calm and stoic all the time. cale henituse could also be jealous of other people. that's why buying you those kinds of things is his own unique way to show other people that you are his.

since you are the young master silver shield's precious lady, many people will try to get close to you just to get close to cale.

of course, cale and his group won't allow that. you don't have to worry since those people who keep pestering you will disappear tomorrow without any traces left.

if you stay still and keep listening to cale. he will never take your freedom away from you. but if you try to run away from him? ehem, cale won't hesitate to kidnap you.

he is the hero who saved both the eastern and western continents. he is known as a just and kind hero. that's why it was easy for him to deceive everyone that he isn't the person behind your disappearance.

cale had a simple dream. and that is to be slacker with you and his family. that's why he will do everything to keep you with him.

oh, and remember cale's children? on, hong and raon?

they are also platonic yanderes for you. if their father is obsessive, possessive, manipulative, and clingy type. the three of them are overprotective and clingy.

they really love you so much! so they have no complaints about you being their father's lover!

the three of them always follow you around and you have no complaints about it. since you are completely unaware they are following you to make sure that you won't leave their father just for some unknown guy.

and if there is some unknown guy who tried to flirt with you. they will surely tell it to cale. and oh, are you wondering what'll gonna happen to that guy? let's just say that the kids + cale and co. already take care of him.

being young master silver shield's lover is kinda fun, right?

“ i can't help, but be selfish when it comes to you. ”

#yandere manhwa x reader #yandere x reader #yandere x y/n #manhwa x reader #yandere #yandere headcanons #yandere manhwa #trash of the count's family #cale henituse #cale henituse x reader #lout of the count’s family #tcf #on #hong #raon miru #tcf x reader #reader insert

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bbanghiitomi · 9 months

Text

| silver lining

synopsis: how does one get another chance to have the love of their life back to their arms? hanni loves you, but you are so hard to love — and so hard to forget.

— nonidol!vballplayer!phanni × nonidol!fem!reader

└⁠(⁠ ⁠＾⁠ω⁠＾⁠)⁠」└⁠(⁠ ⁠＾⁠ω⁠＾⁠)⁠」└⁠(⁠ ⁠＾⁠ω⁠＾⁠)⁠」└⁠(⁠ ⁠＾⁠ω

"oh that's weird, y/n doesn't come here anymore." minji mutters as she looks around the court, darting her eyes for the familiar figure of a student who usually sat by one of the bleachers, with her books — watching from afar. hanni sighs a deep sigh, letting go of the volleyball, watching as it bounced around the court, the sound echoing inside the almost empty hall. hearing your name threw hanni off, but she's not one to let her friend know. it's been almost 3 months since you haven't been here to watch the team's practice. hanni has accepted that you will also not be here for the next few months.

hanni needs to get herself used to no sight of you, it's her fault anyway. she had a hard time realizing your importance to her life, her volleyball career and her studies, and you're not even the one helping her — it's just that, hanni loves your presence, it eases her mind amidst pressure. but oh well, she had to fumble the only one who truly loves her. even hanni herself doesn't know why she fucked up real bad, it's just her asking for assurance, something — she doesn't know, hanni wanted to know what she really means to you but in the end it led to the two of you growing apart from each other.

you said it, you love her — you really do, you watch her during her volleyball sessions, support her studies, activities and stuff, even hanni knows how much you love her. she doubted yeah, that's her fault, hanni admits that. how can she be assured if you're so scared to tell everyone? yeah, you're not ready that's why and she's been selfish to not understand why.

it's also been almost three months since you last talked to her. it's already tearing her apart and she's not brave enough to admit that. she missed talking to you, whether it's about the season, the upcoming rains, school, the world or like — anything! even about global warming, or the 4th dimension. why'd she have to push you away? why did you have to let go?

now she's lost in this deep void, missing your smile and such, your voice, hugs, the smoothness of your hand — your gazes, even the way you dissociate when she's talking to you, it's cute. it's only now she's realizing that a part of her life revolves around you.

"do you know why she's not here anymore?" minji asks, and they walk their way over to the bench, grabbing their bottles and towels. hanni knew, obviously, but she also respects your privacy, your secrets, including your relationship with hanni. "i don't know." she shrugs, burying her face in the soft towel and oh — god it smells like the fabric conditioner your mom uses.

hanni peeks at her friend, who seemed lost, a different kind of lost, maybe confused?

"why did you ask?" hanni asks back, holding the towel with a grip. minji looks at her friend and shakes her head, turning her back for her friend to see instead of her face. "i don't know, just curious. she's always one of those people who watched but she just disappeared and hasn't come back since." yeah, you're always present, doesn't matter if it's training or the actual game, as long as hanni's present, you are present. like a buy one take one package.

hanni ignores the bubbling acid inside her stomach, realizing it's just not her who acknowledges your presence.

"oh well, she probably got tired of watching and has been somewhere else." hanni mutters, walking away from her friend with the towel that smells like you.

the towel with your scent is one thing, but the pens, notes, books and papers of yours inside hanni's room, is a thing… they're scattered everywhere in the room, the drawers, cabinets, and every little corner of the room screams… you. you've left so much in her room, haven't come back for it since then. hanni doesn't know when that day will come, probably never.

hanni starts to fear that you guys are losing touch, it feels like she doesn't exist to you anymore — if there was something she could do about it, just to be able to salvage this relationship, she'll go through hell just to do it.

it's really frustrating, she's still deeply in love, missing your warmth next to her — being on this bed isn't the same without the other piece of her puzzle, cuddling with a lifeless pillow doesn't give her the satisfaction like your breathing on her ear does. your weighted blanket seems to make her situation worse, with the remnants of your existence, a role in hanni's life — still intact with her, how is she supposed to let go?

when are you planning to come back?

hanni still hopes that there is still a chance, pick up the broken pieces and put them all back together.

god that sounds pathetic and stupid.

"where are you going?" the libero asks, hanni's eyes glances at minji's scurrying figure, eagerly stuffing her things inside her bag — a focused look on her face. minji doesn't answer, but only for a while as she regains her posture. "somewhere — the library." her voice seems in a hurry, hanni raises a brow, to judge.

"library? what are you there for? to hit on a girl?" hanni lets out an airy laugh, minji is silent, and makes hanni stare at her friend who sheepishly laughs. "no? no, not really. i went there to start reading books." hanni squints her eyes at her friend and leans in to inspect her face. "bro i know you're lying!" hanni frowns at her friend who shook her head.

"i don't care bro! i literally am there to read."

it was silent, hanni continues to stare down at her friend, who she knows must be lying — like they've been friends for more than 5 years, there's no way she wouldn't know.

well yeah maybe minji likes books but… a literature club? who would waste their time there? hanni can't even think of any people who would be willing to sit there for hours reading books,

maybe…

except for —

you.

"alright bro! i like a girl there, happy? but i won't tell you, can't risk you ruining my chance." minji pulls the strap of her bag and makes her way out, hanni tries to catch up but fails to even get to the exit of the gym. "hey!"

"don't even try catching up!" minji yells, her deep voice echoing inside the court.

hanni must have forgotten no one except the two of you and your friend knew about your relationship, hanni and you kept it a secret, both of you agreed. you can vividly remember how you explained the reasons as to why it's hard for you to reveal the relationship, life, status, family shit and bla bla bla…

hanni literally agreed, because she cared for you, she knows how hard your situation is — you love her really, but apart from her immense popularity that will get you in trouble, your parents are tough. the kind who doesn't want anyone ever involved with you, the kind who wants you buried under piles of books and studies.

oh how dead hanni would be if they found out.

so, when hanni complained about the lack of labels — lack of transparency between your relationship with her, you were beyond confused, because you expected her to know better, to fully grasp as to why you both needed to keep everything a secret.

it frustrated you too, there was no way to fix this — unless both of you come to talk and agree about one thing: you still love each other even after that argument.

but here's the glaring contradiction, how are you going to approach her? how is hanni supposed to approach you?

you have too much pride in your chest, and so does hanni — like, who knows how hard it is for one of you to come up and tell the other how much they've missed each other.

it's not just like asking how is the weather, what's the temperature today, is it raining? is there homework? this is way too hard.

who knows how long you've been dissociating, you don't even realize it until a hand touches your shoulder. you shot your eyes open and look behind to see minji, hanni's friend — the tall girl smiled at you and sat beside you.

you smile back at her, your palm touching your cheek, trying to feel the sudden rise of temperature your body emits. you sigh, to which made minji tilt her head. "what's the matter?" she asks, you lock your eyes with hers and shrug.

"i don't know either, to be honest." you look away, footsteps are heard towards their way, another person sits in front of minji, it's danielle marsh — your friend and a co-member of the literature club. danielle smiles widely at minji's direction when their eyes meet. you are busy staring at nothing but thin air, minji feels her cheeks light up and she looks away to catch her breath with how danielle stole it.

you sigh deeply, looking out at the window not too far from you, your friend danielle notices your mood and reaches her hand to you. "hey y/n, what's up? still sad?" she asks, books of all genres are neatly stacked on the table.

y/n taps her fingers on the table, she refuses to look back at danielle, clearly bothered. "i don't know, i'm just down. i think." minji looks at you and at your friend, seeing as she is as bothered as you are, yet she can't really interfere as it's not her business to meddle with.

"it's okay y/n, eventually we'll find a way to fix your sadness! for now, i think it's best to let yourself rest and stop thinking of anything so serious." danielle raises a book to her face, minji smiles. "i recommend reading more books!" danielle beamed.

"are you going to the library again?" hanni asks as she watches her friend walk past her. minji looks back and bobs her head, with a serious look on her face. "yeah, why?" hanni turns around, then back to minji. "for what though?" hanni asks.

minji shrugs, "to read, duh?" hanni walks over to her friend and holds her friend's wrist. "i'm gonna come with you." hanni tightens her hold to her friend's wrist and pulled her, leading them to the library where minji tried to pull her hand away. "bro what are you doing?!" minji complains, but hanni is stubborn enough not to listen, dragging her friend.

"you're not a part of the club!" minji reminds the girl, her brows furrowing, shooting sharp glares towards hanni's back. "i will be then!" hanni's persistence leads them inside the library where minji keeps her mouth shut. looking around, hanni sees danielle — her ex's friend, hanni takes them to the shared table, where danielle and her eyes meet.

danielle kicks your feet under the table, and you look up to give her a glare. "look!" danielle whispers, you turn your head to see hanni and minji together. you immediately scramble to look away and back to the pages of the book you lock your eyes on the sentences, your mind out of focus.

minji pulls her hand from hanni's grip and points to the seat beside danielle. "you sit there, i will sit beside y/n." minji whispers, hanni nods, sitting beside danielle, across minji who sat beside you.

minji notices your focused look, staring so hard at your book, but not turning the pages. "hey, is there something wrong with the book?" minji whispers, her face close to yours. hanni's presence makes your cheeks flush, but the short girl mistook it as your reaction to minji's face close to yours.

danielle looks nervous beside hanni, a book in her hands, witnessing the tension unfold in front of her. "you're not gonna read a book?" danielle asks, hanni shoots her eyes at danielle and scrambles to reach a book and start reading, peeking at minji and you from time to time.

she squints her eyes when you smile at minji, and when minji chuckles at your reaction.

there is no way right — that you are the girl minji is making moves at?

it's not too impossible, that's the bad thing.

minji looks at her friend everytime hanni scoffs under her breath. "bro what's up with you?" minji mouths at hanni's direction, looking at you and danielle who are both occupied with the books in your hands.

hanni ignores her friend and covers her face with the book.

"are you coming with me again?" minji asks, not bothering to look at her friend who follows behind her as they walk on the busy street on the way home. hanni looks at her friend and asks, her shorter legs trying to catch up to her tall friend.

"for what? we don't have volleyball practice for today and there's no library meeting." hanni runs to minji's side, her eyes twitching when she sees the bright signature grin plastered on minji's face. minji looks at her friend while they walk past buildings. "oh i forgot to add you to the group chat, danielle said she wants to make adjustments to attract more students to join and will hold a meeting at a cafe."

hanni scoffs at her friend. "oh wow thanks for informing me."

minji laughs and nudges her friend. "bro, don't be jealous, you're still my best friend." hanni sees an unusual happiness on minji's face, and she pouts. "why are you so happy all of the sudden? it's not like the coach praised us yesterday." hanni watches as minji puts her hand on her mouth, giggling, her cheeks flushed the same shade as a ripe tomato.

"i'm just excited." hanni glares at her friend, remembering how sweet you were with minji yesterday, your hand on her shoulder, arms basically touching each other. oh how nice, it's only between you or danielle who this idiot might be liking.

hanni still loves you, and this causes her to get jealous.

but also because she also loves minji, her one and only best friend.

ugh, why did you have to keep your relationship with hanni as secret even to her friend? now minji has no freaking idea and is probably crushing on her friend's ex, which is very not so minji.

"really?" hanni deadpans.

minji widens her eyes and smiles so bright, basically beaming at hanni's solemn face. "of course! i'm starting to love reading! and you know…" minji's gummy smile blinds hanni, she watches as her friend stops walking and scratches her nape. "you don't even participate in reading in our literature class." hanni states, biting her inner cheek, minji rolls her eyes playfully. "oh, i hate mrs. jung." hanni laughs.

they stand in front of a flower shop, minji notices when she turns her body around. "oh, a tulip!" minji locks her eyes at a white tulip, hanni feels her heart stop.

oh my god, that's your favorite flower (basically because that is also danielle's favorite flower), you're pretty simple, really, whatever danielle loves — you love it! you are basically attached to the hip, just like minji and hanni.

"w-what about it?" hanni laughs nervously, minji turns her head to hanni with flushing cheeks, and shakes her head. "nothing." it's silent for a minute or two before minji points at it.

"you used to buy those, right? i never really saw you give it to anyone." minji muttered, hanni bites her bottom lip and looks around, pointing at herself. "oh really? yeah… my aunt — she loves tulips, you haven't met her right?" hanni grins at minji, looking like a troll.

minji nods and smiles. "i also know someone right now who also loves white tulips." she whispered, enough for hanni to hear.

oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no…

"oh really?" hanni smiles, the corner of her lips twitching. minji laughs and shakes her head. "just kidding." hanni does not know if minji is genuine or the world is just beating her down.

oh please let it be the latter.

when they got inside the cafe, hanni's eyes immediately landed on your figure sitting on the chairs with a book. you look really peaceful, beside your serene expression, your seat basically provides the best view of the land outside.

"danielle!" minji waves her hand at danielle and approaches the table with hanni trailing behind. danielle is busy with her laptop and looks up to smile at the pair. "oh hi guys!" she beams. you look up from your book and meekly speak. "hi."

hanni sits beside minji, in front of danielle and props her hands on the table. minji looks at her friend to see if she's sitting and nods when their eyes meet. "hey, we're not late aren't we?" minji asks, raising her brows at the two girls on the other side. danielle shakes her head and giggles. "nope! perfectly on time! as expected." she smiles.

minji grins, hanni watches your movements, as your eyes lock at minji while she speaks. "great! we can discuss what's going to be our plan!"

everyone comes to an agreement and they'll be putting up posters on the bulletin boards around the school, and will be posting on their shared blogs to attract students.

you identified that reading has been the current trend of students around your ages noawadays, it's best to create book lists or recommended books of different genres, while reviewing it for more students of their school to see.

with the help of jang wonyoung, the student council's president (friends with hanni and minji), girlfriend of the school volleyball team's captain (ahn yujin)— your club could get the traction needed to boost the application of new club members!

"okay, so we just need wonyoung to convince students to join." minji mutters, standing in the middle of the corridor beside her friend. "well yeah, pretty sure it'll work — i mean, she's popular and there's pretty much lots of advantages to being a part of the club." hanni shrugs, flipping the flyers.

"uh hey, are you guys part of the literature club?" a meek, shorter (but taller than hanni) girl asks, looking at minji with two books cradled on her arms. hanni blinks, from afar she sees a taller girl catching up. "jesus! haerin-unnie you didn't even wait for me!" the girl huffs and glares at her friend.

minji nods. "oh yeah! we are, is there anything we can do to help you two?"

"i'm gonna join the club, i'm here to ask for an application letter to fill up." the girl, haerin stares at minji. the taller girl raises her hand, with a determined look. "me too!" haerin glares at the tallest girl. "this is a serious matter." haerin mutters. minji laughs sheepishly to try and calm the girl down.

"hey, don't worry, anyone can join. reading is for everyone and it's not bad to give it a try, right?" hanni shrugs, earning a nod from minji. "but… hyein said she's also joining the volleyball varsity team." haerin whispers, looking away.

hyein sighs. "but can i not join both — i don't want to leave you alone." minji smiles at haerin and waves two application letters. "it's alright, we're also part of the volleyball team. we can make it work." she says, haerin locks eyes with the older girl and gives her a nod.

after only a few days, the application went up to 7 new members. it led them to closing the application for a short amount of time only, until they are able to adjust some schedules for everyone.

"can you come with me for a bit? i need to buy something." minji waves her hand to gesture hanni to follow her, they leave the school building, thinking they're heading home hanni groans when she gets called. "what?" the shorter grumbles under her breath.

they walked towards the flower shop they once encountered before. hanni feels her stomach drop, a bubbling anxiety rising inside her when minji tells her to stay and enters inside the shop.

oh god, no please — no!

hanni, calm down…

no!

oh shit, uhm…

this is awkward.

minji comes back with three white tulip flowers in hand, neatly wrapped with colorful plastic and used newspaper.

oh come on dude!

is she serious?

hanni feels all her emotions inside arguing with one another, she watches as minji walks towards with her signature shy, gummy smile.

"oh, what's that for — bro?" hanni kind of cracks the last word, her breath sharp. minji laughs and pushes her friend's shoulder lightly. "you know, uhm… nevermind. i'll go back to school to give this to someone," minji's eyes lock with hanni's and they stare at each other before minji continues. "you can head home if you want."

what is hanni supposed to say?

a part of her wanted to oppose the idea, she has to know who that girl is! did minji ever felt like this before with her relationship with you?

now it all makes sense.

but at the same time — if that girl would be you, hanni knows she wouldn't be able to handle it.

oh she would be pulling her hair in no time.

"m'kay? i'll leave now." minji waves and walks away, hanni stands still, stuck — frozen in time as she watches her friend disappear.

danielle is giggling, ever since the classes started — you don't know why but… she's unusually happy today, well she is happy everyday, but today she's extra giddy.

the romantic type of giddy.

"something special coming up?" you asks her, flashing her a supportive smile — danielle giggles holding her books close to her, sighing dreamily, looking up like disney princess that she is.

"minji told me she wanted to meet me later at the school fountain." you couldn't help but laugh at your friend's blushing face, clearly in love. you nod, putting a hand on her shoulder before speaking.

"take care of each other, okay?" you tell her, danielle nods. "we will."

after standing there for almost 20 minutes, hanni has decided that she needs to make a run for it — a part of her is dying to know, it may seem really stupid of her but she's not just gonna stand there and wait, until she finds out later.

her shoes digs the ground before she starts dashing — a different kind of rush, the same she gets playing runs through her veins. with how fast hanni is running, the wind blew against her face harshly, her hair flowing behind her gracefully. people stare at her, as she runs so fast, accelerating with every second that passes.

she's not gonna lose you, ever again.

you walk the empty hallway, trying to ease your mind as you wait for your friend to come back. a lot had happened in the past few days, you still haven't had the courage to come talk to hanni again. it must be really that hard, you don't know what hanni might be feeling, if she's still in love with you the way you are with her.

is there really no chance anymore?

your steps are light, as if there are cracks under your feet, your eyes are fixed to the empty hall — wishing there's some kind of anything to help you relax your mind.

you hear harsh steps, like someone was running, you squint your eyes to the end of the hall, where there's a turn to the right and left and there you see someone, bending down to try catching their breath, hands on their knees.

you walk closer, and a little faster and as you get closer it becomes clear — it's hanni!

"hanni!" you shout, your voice echoing on the walls enough for hanni to hear. not even a hundred meters apart, hanni looks up to see you, standing with your hands on your books.

her eyes widens, her pupils stills on your figure.

you're here.

hanni takes a deep breath and rushes to you, a smile creeping up her face.

and she realizes,

if you're here, and minji isn't.

then where is minji?

"why are you here?" you ask, looking at her. hanni puts a hand on her chest and heaves. "where is minji?" hanni looks up at you, you feel your shoulders stiffen and you shrug. "i don't know." you do know, but you didn't want to ruin her and danielle's moment together.

"did you get flowers?" you tilt your head with her questions, not understanding why she's throwing those at you. you shook your head. "no, why?" your eyes squint at her.

"minji didn't give you any?"

you furrowed your brows.

"why would she?"

hanni laughs, slapping a hand on her cheek.

you are still so confused.

what's up with her?

hanni groans and slumps her shoulders.

danielle isn't here…

"where's danielle?"

you shift your eyes away.

"with minji."

"o-oh…" hanni whispers.

oh,

oh!

oh my god! the white tulips! of course it's… it's danielle, geez…

hanni feels like an idiot, standing in front of you with her heart beating so loud it's hurting her ears. you look at her and sigh. "you're so weird today." you tell her, pouting your lips.

hanni laughs. "i'm sorry it's just that—!" she pauses, looking at you with her doe eyes, you blink — feeling your face warm up.

"...i'm still in love with you." hanni finishes.

you scratch your cheek and reply. "what does that have to do with minji?"

hanni wants to tell you, but it's too ridiculous.

"nothing, argh! y/n, i still love you even after everything. i know, you probably don't care about me anymore and that's okay, i just needed to get this out of my chest. it's bothering me so much no matter what time of day. i can't be beside you while feeling like i could've done something to save us." hanni shrugs, biting her inner cheek as she waits for your response.

you put your hand down and nodded.

"i understand. it's also my fault too, i admit to my mistakes and all the things i could've done for you. and no, you're wrong, i still care about you." you smile at her, you see her taking a deep breath and closing her eyes tight.

with a wincing expression, she opens one eye and looks at you. "d-do you still love me?"

you laugh at her face, feeling something bloom once again inside of you. oh, you still love her of course, she has never failed in making you love her.

you wipe the tear on your eye with an index finger. "of course i do, silly." you added. "i've always loved you."

that send electricity coursing inside of hanni, she opens her eyes and feels her blood boiling up to her face. hanni panics, putting her hands on her face, feeling the warmth spread in her.

"oh gosh, what do i do?"

you smile sweetly at her and look behind to see minji and danielle. hanni follows your line of sight, sees the pair walking past the hallway, until they both disappeared from the couple's line of sight.

you start walking and grazed your hand on hanni's arms before intertwining your fingers with hers. "i love you." you whisper before pulling her to walk with you.

hanni's face is fifty shades red, feeling your warm hand on hers.

this time it's sure, it's true and it's going to be better.

#female reader #kpop imagines #kpop #newjeans #danielle #newjeans imagines #husseyz #hanni #girl group #lee hyein #girlgroup imagines #pham hanni #hanni pham #hanni x reader #newjeans hanni #newjeans x reader

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fairuzfan · 3 months

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It's the zionist concern anon again. I will say for now that with what you said about prioritizing Palestinians I do agree. The people going through a genocide are a bigger priority than people who are not going through a genocide. I just fear that due to the fact I am neither Palestinian or Jewish that I may end up embracing stances that I do not actually understand and that innocent people may suffer because of it. I do not want to be irresponsible. I am also someone who lives in a country built on stolen land, so that does to some sort of extent influence my feelings on Isreal as I imagine many people in Isreal share my thoughts on the fact we have lived our entire lives on stolen land. As I said before, I also do not know any Palestinians personally so I find it hard to know who I can ask about the history, Hamas, technical details of politics, etc without risking being taught the wrong things. On a much more selfish note, I also struggle with debilitating mental health issues that make it very difficult to navigate moral issues especially if the moral issues do not impact me on a personal level. So if I am being honest, my questions are not entirely selfless as I have very self-centered fears on if I am actually a horrible person. I thank you again for being so understanding, but I figure the right thing to do here is admit I am likely not as pure intentioned in my questions as I should be when a large factor to why I worked up the courage to ask is in hope I am worrying too much about my quality of moral character from a selfish perspective. Again, I thank you for being so understanding and willing to answer these asks instead of just brushing me off as a horrible zionist.

I don't think you're a horrible person at all I just think everyone has underlying zionist biases because it's a product of the society we live in.

And I do understand where you're coming from, honestly. Something that always helps me is remembering something that my parents taught me as a kid: always stand on the side of the oppressed. Now as I grew up I realized you have to define what oppression means and I think exploring that will also help you get a better understanding of how to combat other forms of racism/antisemitism/transphobia/etc.

If you do want to learn about hamas tho, I would suggest taking a look at Tareq Baconi, he has a lot of writings about the history of Hamas and he's Palestinian. There are also Palestinian podcasts and social media accounts. I understand that not knowing a palestinian personally to help you guide yourself through these things is daunting, but there are plenty of resources to help! It's why I'm here on this blog honestly, I don't mind you reaching out to me for questions or anything.

A good principle to remind ourselves with is "how can I ensure that justice can be had?" And to find the answer to that you need to look into multiple types of antizionist thought. Some blogs I like to check out for a diverse antizionist opinion are @el-shab-hussein and @bringmemyrocks as a couple of examples. Plus I'd look to Black American thinkers on antiracism (like Angela Davis and James Baldwin and Kwame Ture) because they do a good job of showing you how to examine your internal biases which we are all subject to.

I don't think this selfish to want to be a good person. I have the same worries. I actually do get worried that sometimes I'm *actually* a bad person secretly without me realizing and I reach out to friends and family to talk it out. Something that helps me through this is realizing that you have to forgive yourself for previous beliefs you've had and promise yourself to do better because at the end of the day youre human and you make mistakes.

But really my biggest advice is to read and listen to a variety of schools of thought and if you can, interact with local communities dedicated to antiracism. Even if theyre digital communities! That will help a lot with identifying any problem points.

Again, feel free to reach out with any questions. I don't think you're a zionist at all! Please don't worry and thanks for reaching out :)

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illegiblewords · 4 months

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SOME ILLEGIBLE RAMBLES AND REFLECTIONS: MISSING WYLL

Jumping off my last analytical post for BG3, I actually do want to talk about Wyll a little. Wyll has been the companion I've had the trickiest time sorting thoughts out on. I do have thoughts on him, and frankly I want to invite people who are mainly Wyll fans to chime in if they have any observations that I might've missed! I don't know if this is the best way to explain it, but my perspective is if his story were a song I'd say he has the makings of a beautiful one--but there are notes missing. Notes that really, really should be there . I don't know why they aren't there, or if they've been hidden somewhere I haven't found yet.

As usual, longass discussion under the cut.

Here is my understanding of Wyll currently, without grabbing specific quotes.

Ulder Ravegard is his dad, who was a humble blacksmith who rose to nobility through some exceptional effort and personal achievement. Pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps sort of guy, takes pride in being compassionate and dealing with others in good faith. Raised Wyll not to consider himself better than anyone due to his status, but also seems to have imparted a lot of lawful good mentalities tbh. One thing that stood out a lot to me was a line Wyll said in Act III about how as a kid, he used to pretend to kill monsters in the park all the time. When he became an actual monster hunter as the Blade of Frontiers he had the disquieting realization that most monsters in reality are only people, just like him and his friends. This is interesting to me because it was NOT a lesson he got as a kid, and from how Ulder treats Wyll I don't think it's something Ulder is quite comfortable with himself. I'd go so far as to argue that, while Ulder's definition of 'good' is genuinely very good--it doesn't leave a lot of tolerance for anyone outside that. His compassion only goes so far and no farther. He's a little black-and-white in his thinking.

Side note: Wyll seems to treat being Blade of Frontiers like being a two-dimensional hero in a storybook at times. The Act III line where he admits it's all just messy people was so fucking interesting, and I wish there was more examination of the messy morality of trying to fight monsters or even understand what monsters are for him. Being good isn't easy or guaranteed and the most impressive title in the world doesn't prove you're actually a hero. Actions come before reputation.

Wyll was, according to the previous point, raised to be the embodiment of lawful good as Ulder saw it. Be selfless, don't indulge in finery or status, be noble, make sacrifices for the greater good. With that in-mind, I want to point out that for all Wyll doesn't like courtly life he loves to dance as something more aligned to that courtly lifestyle. It's one of the things he has left that continues to give him joy. It's an indulgence.

Wyll, as raised by Ulder, sacrifices his own well-being and future in his pact with Mizora to ensure no one else in Baldur's Gate came to harm. He was also bound in such a way that prevented him from explaining what happened or why. When Ulder saw his son return home with one eye, pacted to a devil, obviously in a lot of distress and struggling to explain something... Ulder's reaction wasn't to trust his son's morality or feel concern for him. Ulder decided to hurl out all history, all individual understanding of Wyll's character, and chuck Wyll out like he was a pure evil aligned monster and always had been. He just assumed Wyll was the embodiment of every selfish, depraved impulse he could imagine and a traitor to every cause he believed in. He also does not change his mind on this unless forcibly shown through the tadpole what actually transpired. He is not willing to listen or consider alternate perspectives, and I'd argue he loved his son as an abstract concept/extension of his own moral beliefs more than as his own person. (And as an aside: given how Ulder reacted to Wyll without even knowing his situation, do you think he would be ready to show compassion to someone like Astarion who has done horrific things to others under coercion?)

Note, Wyll never actually deals with previous point emotionally. He never allows himself to feel anger or grief over the way his own father treated him. He never lashes out at Ulder on his own behalf for not seeing him as a person, for not treating him as a person, for not loving him as a person or as his son. Ulder talks almost casually about having misjudged Wyll. 'Whoops my bad, I might be an asshole'. We're in a game where Astarion kills Cazador and just starts screaming and sobbing on his knees over everything that happened. Why isn't Wyll pissed off that everything he endured ALONE, the realization that his father never really saw or trusted him, was met with 'whoops'? Why isn't Ulder more horrified over what he did to Wyll? The fact that he isn't so much as in the same breath as other characters expressing anguish makes me think he still, STILL does not understand what he put Wyll through as his father. And Wyll having no reaction other than 'yay Dad likes me again :D' doesn't ring true imo. It's possible to love someone but be absolutely furious with or hurt by them. Mizora was not the only one who did Wyll dirty.

Wyll's pact with Mizora in the first place hinged on Wyll not trusting himself to keep Baldur's Gate safe from the cult of Tiamat AND Wyll not considering himself someone also worthy of protection too. Wyll is part of the tradition 'other people's suffering counts but not mine, I exist to be a shield for others'. I don't think Wyll has ever been taught he is also part of Baldur's Gate who should be kept safe. Self-sacrifice under those circumstances isn't an informed choice but like a self-destructive person offering their life up for cheap, when it isn't strictly necessary. First resort rather than last kinda deal.

Unless I've forgotten something, Wyll breaking his pact is framed not only by Mizora but the narrative as Wyll being selfish and deciding his father should die instead of keeping himself bound. The narrative itself doesn't really challenge this idea even if Wyll does successfully save Ulder unbound by his pact with Mizora. In my experience, out of all the cast members I think Wyll is the only one who is framed as possibly a worse person for opting out of the abusive relationship he's in. I really don't think he should be. Healthy selfishness (self-care, self-esteem) is not a bad thing. We have sayings about not setting ourselves on fire to keep others warm. I don't know why Wyll isn't given room to realize, discuss, and embrace this. In addition to everything else I've mentioned it kind of kills the shape of his character arc imo. Wyll starts off selfless to a fault. Having him remain selfless to a fault and continue making the same choices he did at the beginning sets him up for spiritual death as a character, which would make him staying pacted to Mizora fitting to articulate that concept in a way. He didn't 'sin' against or wrong other people to become a devil, but he absolutely 'sinned' against himself by allowing it to continue. It's total self-destruction and it's tragic. But when he breaks the cycle, in canon any degree of selfishness is still narratively condemned. He only gets "redeemed" if he saves Ulder, in the sense that he is still enforced as a selfless person/he is only so good as he is selfless. ADDITIONALLY! He's given a choice between protecting people as Archduke or protecting people as Blade of Avernus but there isn't actually a whole lot of discussion about Wyll's own happiness regardless of others. Wyll isn't given room to feel ugly emotions, anger on his own behalf, or basic self-preservation without the game itself side-eyeing him. Wyll should not have to be a "perfect" and selfless person to be a good and worthwhile person worth protecting.

Like... what bothers me, is that Wyll isn't given room to express or examine anything. He isn't allowed to feel conflicted or angry. He isn't allowed to want for himself. He isn't allowed to be furious with his father or to wonder if his anger at his father (who he still loves) fuels his desire to break his pact with Mizora or if it's just treating himself like he's worth something too. It kind of feels like the narrative itself is dehumanizing Wyll by denying him room to be selfish at all, even when he really needs to be. Even when it would give room for emotional and complex scenes that could resonate.

When I've thought about what kind of romantic partner would be most interesting for Wyll imo, what struck me was it should be someone who is selfish and actually encourages his selfishness a bit. Not in a corrupting way (even if he worries it might be at times) but someone who can encourage some balance in him and vice versa. I don't think Wyll works as a narrative tool to show how nice another character already is or be their trophy boyfriend. As a character, him being imperfect I think is intrinsically important to him feeling real. And guy really does deserve to feel real, you know?

It's been weird, since Wyll approaches some of my absolute favorite themes as a character for being a hero who needs to understand not being heroic all the time is okay/heroes need protecting too sometimes. But he doesn't really do anything with them currently as far as I'm aware. That's made it harder for me to engage with him. If his romance route touches on it more like then that's awesome. But I feel like if we could see full character arcs for other companions regardless of romance, it should be doable for Wyll too.

#final fantasy xiv screenshots #Wyll Ravengard #Blade of Frontiers #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate iii #bg3 #bgiii

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picturejasper20 · 6 months

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I want to talk about Vlad Masters characterization in the game "Nickelodeon All Star Brawl 2" story mode.

So, Vlad is the main antagonist of this game, or at least that's what the game makes you want to think at the start until the weird time loops start happening and Plasmius keeps repeating things like "Mind controlling everyone is the way to save everyone" and "Don't you understand?!", which comes off as weird to the hero character.

The last time you beat him, Clockwork transports him into the same void "safe space" other characters are in. You can go and ask Vlad what he was talking about and he will answer how there is a bigger enemy at moment: Clockwork.

It is later revealed that Clockwork got infected by Vlad's mind control device, which in reality doesn't work as it should and makes people acts volatile and agressive instead. The "evil" Clockwork has been sending the hero protagonist to stop Plasmius from fixing his mind control machine and make the universe destroy on purpose again and again. Vlas has been trapped in these time loops like that player has been and he remembers what happened each time, forced to see the same event repeat all over again

Meaning that all this time the hero protagonist has been the "bad guy" while Vlad was trying to fix the mind control machine to prevent the universe from getting destroyed. Vlad even mentions this near the end of the game, calling himself "the hero of the story"

Of course, that's incorrect because Vlad was trying to freaking brainwash everyone. But it is interesting is how he is potrayed as sympathetic to some extent as he was trying to do the "right thing". He talks to the hero protagonist about how Clockwork isn't himself and he shouldn't be trusted.

This characterization reminds quite a lot from the one that he has in "A Glitch in Time" graphic novel. In the novel he helps Danny with searching for the source of ghost power and defeating Dan. He realizes the wrong of his selfish past actions and starts a path to redemption near the end of the story.

Considering that Nickelodeon All-Star Brawl 2 involves time travel and time loops like A Glitch in Time, it wouldn't be out of place to say that Vlad's characterization in the game is intentional, probably being written with the goal to be close to his character version in A Glitch In Time.

While Vlad doesn't exactly regret his actions at the end of the game, the idea of him not being as evil as he looks/ having standars is still there. There has been certain change of how his character gets potrayed lately. To someone more sympathetic, less emphasis on "evil" and more "he doesn't understand what he is himself getting into" vibes.

It also suprised me how he was chosen to be one of the main antagonists for this game and one of the characters that has the most lines in the story mode. It makes you wonder why they didn't make a Danny Phantom game instead since all the plot revolves around Danny Phantom characters.

On smaller observation, despite Vlad's motivations being "taking control over the universe" there are some lines of dialogue that hint as his own loneliness such as saying the game player that "they would make a good sidekick" and regreting "not having an audience" to see how he activates the mind control machine. In part it is understandable this doesn't get expanded upon since there are likely people who play the game that don't know about Danny Phantom.

I don't know who was behind writing the dialogue from this game but one thing i can say is that they seem to get Vlad's character in a good part, specially how he doesn't seem himself as a villain in certain moments.

All this emphasis in Vlad from AGIT graphic novel and the Nick fighting game makes wonder if he is going to have some important role in possible future stories from the series. It seems to me that it is trying to build up to something to be more than just pure coincidence. If he does gain more protagonism on long run, i hope they continue with this potrayal of his character because i find it pretty interesting.

#danny phantom #vlad plasmius #vlad masters #dp a glitch in time #his dialogue in the game was cool #Like not exactly evil but not good neither #As doing a bad thing to avoid a bigger bad thing from happening

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ssentimentals · 8 months

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seventeen members as their natal charts: joshua

sun in capricorn, moon in taurus

patient and reliable, you can always count on him in times of need and he won't ever disappoint; this man works hard and plays moderately (not a fan of letting loose), very drawn to finest things in life as social status is important for him (just like being financially secure) and he seeks comfort both in places and people

when you hear a loud laughter at the background, you immediately regret calling him, cursing silently at yourself for being impulsive.

'sorry, love, couldn't hear that, come again?' joshua asks, speaking louder than his usual soft tone. 'wait, it's too loud here, let me get out.'

'it's ok, josh, don't bother!' you rush out, not wanting to disturb him. 'sorry i called, go back to your friends, it really is nothing!'

'wait-wait, i can't hear,' there's sound of door opening and then closing before he comes back to you: 'okay, a bit quieter here. hi baby, is everything okay?'

'yeah, all is fine, i'm sorry,' you're trembling but your voice comes out surprisingly steady. stupid anxiety decided to hit you at the most stupid time and out of habit you called joshua, cause he's the one who always managed to calm you down even through the phone.

'why are you apologizing?' joshua sounds confused and you can picture him frowning now. 'what's going on? is everything okay?'

lying to joshua is useless but you try anyway: 'everything is okay, i called you by mistake, sorry. go back to your friends, please, have fun!'

your boyfriend can notice even the slightest change in your voice, so of course you don't fool him: 'what happened? and don't lie to me saying that everything is okay, i can tell it isn't.'

lately nightmares started to plague you and josh knew about it, always being there for you to calm you down. it turned into a habit to call him whenever you wake up in cold sweat, but now you realized how selfish it might have been. not wanting to take his time off from his friends, you stubbornly persist: 'it really is nothing babe, i promise. go back to guys, say hi to everyone from me.'

there's beat of silence and then: 'i'm coming over.' joshua knows that you're going to feel guilty and bad for interrupting him, so he hastily adds: 'i was tired anyways and guys will understand, so don't worry. i'll be there in fifteen, do you want to keep talking on the way or should i hang up?'

the ideal variant for you would be to keep talking but you can't say it, already embarrassed enough as it is. joshua knows you though, knows you so well that you don't have to voice out your thoughts most of the time for him to know what you're thinking about. there's fond sigh on the other side of the phone and he says: 'it's gonna be a bit loud as i go back, just bear with me for a moment, yeah? why don't you get up and make yourself a cup of tea now, love? put me on a speaker.'

you're not sure how joshua does it, how simply hearing his soft voice calms you down and settles your anxiety. how his gentle coaxing gets you moving, how he always knows what exactly you need in any moment. 'i love you,' you whisper after he informs you that he grabbed his coat. 'a lot.'

he chuckles, running back to the car. 'i love you more, darling. i'll always be there for you.'

this man doesn't play games and despites anyone who does; a loverboy, he's sensual and romantic, someone whose love language is spoiling their partner rotten with material (usually very expensive) things; has trouble with unwinding, so someone who is collected and will help him relax/not be so strict is perfect for him

'josh, i...' you pause, momentarily distracted with light hitting diamond's surface, making it sparkle even brighter. gorgeous necklace in your hands stole your breath away and it's hard to find right words to convey all of your emotions. 'it's so beautiful,' you mumble in the end, already knowing what he's going to say next.

'not as beautiful as you,' joshua answers exactly the way you knew he would and yet your cheeks still burn with a crimson blush. 'do you like it?'

it's obvious that you do, but it's important for joshua to hear you say it; the immense satisfaction he feels whenever you utter those words makes him almost giddy with excitement to hear them. you meet his gaze through the mirror and he frowns; he doesn't like this expression on your face, the one where he can tell that you think this necklace is too much for you. he can't have you thinking this, not when he is sure that nothing in this world can ever be good enough for you.

'i think it's too m-'

'don't think,' he interrupts gently, not wanting to make you anxious. he gently helps you to put on the necklace and smiles at your reflection, admiring his gift. 'just enjoy, darling. you deserve all the finest things in life and i'm going to give them all to you.'

he sounds so determined that it makes you shiver, breathless at how much he wants to give you everything. this necklace is wonderful and while it is too much, you shut these voices down in your head, turning to face him. 'thank you, joshua,' you whisper, touching diamond pendant. 'i love it.'

joshua's smile at these words is so full of happiness and fondness that you can't help but smile too. 'you're welcome, love.' he leans in, kissing your forehead. 'it's just the first out of many, many presents. i want to give you everything you deserve.'

'you don't have to, josh,' you remind him simply because you can't not to do so. you know that he loves you without all of this, he makes sure you know this every single day.

he sighs. 'i know. but i want to.'

i'd give you everything if you just let me, he thinks to himself, watching you closely. you smile and his heart skips a beat, when you hug him tight, whispering how much you love him. anything for this, he thinks, hugging you back. anything for you.

a/n: hi god it's me again can i have joshua as a husband please?

tagging @prpldahy

my masterlist is here

#joshua #joshua x reader #seventeen joshua #joshua imagine #seventeen imagine #seventeen fluff #seventeen reaction #seventeen #hong jisoo fluff #hong jisoo #hong jisoo x reader #svt joshua

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lxvenderjewel · 3 months

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song/ship analyses part 9: aziracrow and "goodbye, my danish sweetheart" by mitski

MITSKI TIME MOTHERFUCKERS!! this one will have a lot of like theorizing adjacent stuff

“There's nobody better than you

It took me a while 'til I knew” despite being a demon crowley has better morals than most angels ngl, but azi would be blinded by the fact that he’s a DEMON and probably didn’t realize that fact until the apocawasn’t happened

“But you knew from the start it was us, didn't you?” crowley was in love with azi from the start and he knew it, too. azi was also probably in love with crowley from the start, but he didn’t realize it until 1941. he probably realized crowley had known all along during the s2 finale

“Now I lay as I study a blank wall

Would you spare me your voice if I call?” aziraphale is probably drowning in guilt in heaven, constantly thinking about crowley and how he wants to go back to earth, but he ALSO knows (thinks) that crowley would be livid with him and it scares him

“'Cause you waited and watered my heart 'til it grew” crowley waited the whole time for azi to get to a place where he was comfortable, i firmly believe crowley knew the entire time azi loved him back, he was just waiting for azi to realize it as well, and he just never knew that he already had realized it.

“So, I don't blame you

If you want to bury me in your memory” well this one’s pretty self-explanatory no? azi knows (thinks) crowley would be furious at him and he understands why

“I'm not the girl I ought to be, but” i always interpret this line as “i’m not the angel i ought to be” and well that’s pretty self-explanatory too. azi has never been a perfect angel, and maybe he thinks if he was he wouldn’t be in so much pain

“You can tell them what you saw in me

And not how I turned out to be” azi’s first impression on crowley was that he was an angel that cared so much about humanity he’d go against god’s orders for them. but as they’ve gotten to know each other, crowley’s also learned that azi is selfish. he almost gets discorporated because he wants crepes, he gets convinced to thwart armageddon because crowley brings up his books and restaurants. but he still wants crowley to remember him with the best parts of him, the parts that were in some little part selfless. he wants crowley to have good memories of him, even though he doesn’t (HE DOES) deserve it.

“There's some kind of burning inside me” this is wild wild theorizing but i think azi should’ve fallen by now, crowley was thrown out just for asking questions which azi has done many many times. but maybe god is biding her time, giving him a different punishment? maybe he’ll fall very, very slowly, he won’t even notice

“It's kept me from falling apart

And I'm sure that you've seen what it's done to my heart

But it's kept me from falling apart” and maybe azi knows this too, but he thinks it’s just crowley rubbing off on him, but he loves crowley, so why would he care?

“Now here I lay as I wonder about you

Would you just tell me what I'm meant to do?” remember he wanted crowley to lead with him. crowley and azi have always been a team, so leading by himself must be so stressful, and he def wishes he could just turn and ask crowley what he thinks they should do, before he remembers he didn’t come.

“'Cause I've waited and watered my heart 'til it grew

You can see how it's blossomed for you” in azi’s perspective, he was offering crowley comfort and safety. and crowley rejected that. i won’t pretend to know how azi took that, but he’s def hurt and feels betrayed. what happened to running away to alpha centauri? is this not the same? he took a risk, he asked crowley to run away with him just like crowley had many times before, so why would he reject him?

“You can tell them what you saw in me

And not the way I am” azi wants to be seen as good and heavenly and a pure angel even though he’s not, at least to most people. he didn’t care with crowley but he wishes he’ll at least keep up his good nice angel reputation (he probably will even though he’s heartbroken)

“You can tell them what you saw in me

And not the way I used to be” but maybe, just maybe, azi wants to be remembered as human. purely, unabashedly, human, with his flaws and his strengths, not as if he was some pure angelic force. he tells himself he wants to be a pure good nice angel and that’s why he wants crowley to tell people such. he wants to pretend he’s just the same as before he met crowley, but he’s not. and maybe he likes that. maybe he wants to be human. he wants to be flawed yet still good. but he isn’t. (he is.)

“'Cause there is nobody better than you” crowley is. (so is aziraphale.)

#aziraphale #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #good omens #good omens s2 #angst #ish?#this turned out as more of a songfic than an analysis #but i'm not mad #i kinda like it #i hope this makes sense to literally anyone #song/ship analysis #mitski #goodbye my danish sweetheart

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yanderepuck · 3 months

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OMG I DIDNT REALIZE THAT U DID LIKE. SELF HARM COMFORT FICS I JUST READ YOUR ARTHUR ONE ITS SO GOOD!!!! IIF YOU DONT MINDD could you do likee MC asking one of the guys to kill them..?! I'm curious abt what certain reactions would be!! uhmm you can choose which character to do but preferably leo, arthur, or theo? :3 TYSMM

I'll do lil headcanons of the the three.

THAT BEING SAID!!!! YOU READ THE ASK!!! YOU KNOW WHAT IS COMING. IF YOU DON'T LIKE ANGST OR DON'T WANT TO BE TRIGGERED THEN DO NOT READ THIS POST. I ALWAYS ASK FOR YOU GUYS TO INTERACT IWHT MY POSTS BUT I UNDERSTAND IF YOU CAN'T WITH THESE ONES. BUT EVERY COMMENT IS APPRECIATED

Leonardo

He looks at you after he heard those words. Did he hear you right? Did he just hear you ask for him to kill you? So many thoughts were going through his head and he wasn't sure which one to focus on. This man has a fear of harming you. Yes he won't bite you but that doesn't mean he wants you to die.

You are sitting on the bed crying. You have been in a depression pit for a little over a month now. You can't find motivation to do anything. It might sound selfish, but he would be able to do it so easily.

"Cara mia..." he finally snaps out of his thoughts and pulls you into his lap. There's no chance of getting out of his grasp. You cry louder into his chest. He starts to rub your back, feeling tears form at the corner of his eyes. His voice is shaky but he forces it out. "I...I could never. I love you."

You clutch onto his shirt, just crying harder. Being alive hurts so much. Feeling nothing would be better at this point than constantly thinking of killing yourself. If you could just stop thinking it would help so much.

"I'll help you get through this. Don't worry," he talks softly, trying not to cry too much himself.

Arthur

He freezes at those words. Hes been trained not to freeze in these conditions but how could he not when it's someone he loves.

You're sitting on the edge of his bed, crying. He just finished bandaging up your arm after you just tried to do it yourself. Did you really just say what he thinks you said. Your sobbing just gets harder. Your face is soaked, tears running down your chin and dropping off onto Arthur's hand.

"Love...I..I could never," he reaches up and holds your head between his hands, not caring how wet they get from tears. You didn't dare to move. You didn't deserve his touch but you couldn't muster the energy to move. "I love you-"

"Y-you said- you said you would do a-anything for me!" You half scream half sob. Was he just lying? He said anything.

Arthur gets on the bed with you, getting you to lay down with him. He wraps you in his arms and plays with the ends of your hair. Your cries don't stop. You want to push him away. You want to say horrible things. But you can only cry.

"Shh. Relax, love," he talks softly, holding back tears of his own the best he can. He's not even worried about the blood all over you and him. You keep your arm close to your chest, wanting to keep some distance between the two of you. You don't deserve to be held.

He kisses the top of your head. He thinks back to when he worked as a doctor and how he would help his patients. "Why don't I tell you a story?"

Theo

He blacked out for a moment. Kill you? No no. This couldn't be happening. The two people he loves the most are both-

He snaps out of it and quickly wipes the tears from your face. "Hondj- Liefje..I could never," he brushes the hair out of your face. His touch is soft and gentle. He doesn't take his eyes off yours.

Your eyes seem so lifeless, like there's no light behind them. He's seen this look plenty of times before and he never thought he would see it on you.

"T-Theo pl-please," you plead through your tears. "It hurts. I hurt so much," he's strong. He could make it quick and painless. He would barely have to try.

He's desperately trying to find the right words to say. "I-I can't" tears form at the corners of his eyes. "You can hate me if you want but I could never hurt you. I love you."

You can't look him in the eye. You're too.. embarrassed? No. You're scared. Scared to see the look on his face.

"Come here, Liefje," he pulls you into his body. Not caring how wet you get his clothes. He's not letting you go.

#SO SO SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG #i wrote leonardos part and saved it and then tumblr wouldn't let me edit it until a few days ago #ikevamp #ikemen vampire #ikevamp leonardo #ikevamp arthur #ikevamp theo #angst #tw #tw suicide #tw suicide mention #tw self harn

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madwomansapologist · 10 months

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I just read A Match in Hell (IT WAS DELICIOUS 🌷) and there's the line: "Ah, if only you could control the situation. It would make him cry with exhaustion". I'd love to read Michael being submissive for a human reader. Like, it's his first time, he doesn't know what to do but it feels so good. Almost switching between submissive to primal.

hurts so good | michael realman

synopsis: When Michael creates this neighborhood, he intended to make the five humans lives something worse than the usual torture. Michael just didn't knew that he too would feel tortured. Or that he would like it. [1K]

warnings: human!reader. evil!michael whos not so evil. gaslighting (with the whole "you're on the good place *blink*"). virginity loss.

ps: omg anon you're so nice! hope you like was about to come!

Michael planned everything. The birds always sing too early. A consistent warm weather that is too dry. Clothes without any tags but that still itch somehow. Mosquitoes. Forced monogamy. Frozen yogurt.

Michael really did planned. Eleanor ignoring Chidi's feelings, so scared of physical torture. Chidi overthinking about his own happiness, then about his disguised selfishness. Tahani feeling so lonely, unable to understand why she's never enough. Jason being... Jason. And you.

Without you, things would quickly collapse. A friendly shoulder for when Chidi's is to anxious, but still somehow making him feel worse for lying. You could shut Eleanor's fight or flight response, while still being a reason for her to behave that way. A company for Tahani, but that because of her need to be perfect ends up being one more reason to pretend. One more person for Jason to be scared of.

You were someone who believe to deserves to be on the Good Place. Someone who can torture yourself without noticing. Someone nice enough for no one to think that something is off with this place, but that still makes the four other humans feel bad about themselfs. You were the checks and balances.

But quickly Michael found out that giving you a absent soulmate was a big mistake. Because that absence, that guilt for not being happy, made you search for other people. And thinking that it would be a easy way to torture you, Michael spent time with you.

And that made Michael realize that it was actually quite nice to be with you. To talk to you. To listen to you. That made him think that if everything was different, if the stars had allign, maybe you both could've be friends. Real friends.

"I get it, he likes to work out," you confessed. Sitting across from Michael, the organized office was out of tune with your panic. "But he needs to do it all the time? I don't think he'd ever spent more than ten minutes talking to me."

Michael should've feel proud. He should've feel relieved that his project worked. But why did Michael feel bad to see you fighting your own sorrow? He should've been happier than ever.

"You'll have a infinite amount of time to spent with your soulmate," Michael were really trying to help you. He don't understand why, but he would feel bad if you started crying. "It can take eons for you both to behave like how you think that a couple should. I guarantee you that our sistem did the right thing."

"I know," you felt ashamed to imply that Michael haven't work hard on your neighborhood. He's a god, or at least something similar to that. You don't want to ofend him. "But I feel so lonely."

"But you're always accompanied," said Michael. "I notice that you're approaching other neighbors."

"Not that kind of loneliness."

"There's more then one kind?" Michael reclined in the armchair. "I still don't really know how your emotions work. You guys are often happy when you should be sad and angry when you should be happy, and texting when you should be driving, which is not an emotion, I know, but it's insane. So, teach me, what kind of loneliness is that?"

You laughed, slightly embarrassed. "It's a... physical loneliness." Seeing the uncertainty on his face, you tried to ignore your feelings. "I'm talking about sex."

"Oh," Michael widened his eyes. "I can see why interacting with your neighbors wouldn't hep with that kind of... loneliness. Another thing that I don't understand. Kissing is gross. You just mash your food holes together. It's not for that."

"You never kissed before?" That silenced your problems. "Like never?"

Michael nodded. "Your humans rituals are weird."

"But you have a human body." You leaned forward. "Chidi's from Senegal, Tahani's from Pakistan, actually everyone here is from a differnt place. Different places with different cultures and different rituals."

"What do you mean with that?"

"I don't think that we kiss and fuck because we were taugh that it's how life is supossed to happen," you ran your fingers across his desk, playing with the wood. "We do that because we're curious about our own bodies. So what I mean to say is: have you never been curious about your body?"

Michael crossed his legs. "I... yes. Yes, I've been curious."

And the thing you said next was a summary for why you were chose to this project. You never hear you conscience. Don't matter how loud it screams at you: if you want to do something, you will. Yes, Michael isn't a god. But he still a being powerful enough so you should have a relationship based on respect. You know all those things. You just ignored that voice on your head.

"I can satisfy your curiosity," you stood up, resting your arms on his desk, and leaned in until your face was close to his. "You just have to kiss me."

If things were normal, Michael would've kicked you out of his office. You would've come home embarrassed, hoping that Michael would pretend that nothing happened. But things weren't normal. You're dead, Michael's not-a-god-but-not-so-different-then-one, and his office is private enough.

You told him what to do. And Michael obeyed.

It was a new feeling. Michael never did that before, never imagine that one day he would be kissing a human instead of torturing them. It was new, and scary, and wrong: it was great. It was really great. He didn't plan that, he shouldn't be doing that, but he couldn't stop himself.

You pulled away, forehead resting on his, and felt the warm breath against your face. "Satisfied?" you whispered. You didn't have to open your eyes to understand Michael's response. You felt him deny it, almost exasperated. You understood him. You felt the same.

You kissed him again, and again, and again. Your mouth against his, your hands gripping his hair, until the space between you both was torturous. Without even thinking, unable to reason, Michael just knew he needed you closer.

You grabbed Michael by the tie, lifting him out of the chair, and pulled him towards you. Without ceasing to kiss you, touch you, Michael did what you implicitly asked. Now sitting on the table, you tried to get rid of his suit.

"What..." Michael shut up when he felt your lips on his neck, carressing and biting his skin. "Your soulmate..."

"He can get fucked," you murmured against his skin. If someone ever found out about what is happening, Michael could say he was tempting you. Seeing if you were selfish enough to cheat on your partner. If you were inconsequential enough to fuck someone that you clearly shouldn't. But the truth was the you were the one tempting him. "Sit down."

Michael obeyed you, sitting in the armchair that you occupied before. He watched you take off your pants, as desperate as he was, and climb into his lap. Your weight on him felt right. You kissed him again, guiding his hands down your body, almost begging him to squeeze your flesh.

"Touch me," but that wasn't you begging. That was you demanding.

And so he did. He grabbed you, feeling how delicate your body was in comparison to his, and kissed you again. It was so good, holding you while you kissed him was so good, that Michael almost didn't notice that you had opened his belt.

"Do you want this?" You got away from him, even tho you just wanted him closer and closer. "Do you want to continue?"

Michael kissed you. Ravenously. As if you were the first plate of food he've been served in ages. His hands touched your body, playing with your skin, glued you to him. And with Michael touching you, loving you, you fucked him.

Michael shivered under your touch, your kisses, your bites. He became a mess of groans and hands that didn't know where to touch. "Please," Michael found himself begging for the first time in his long live. He didn't even knew what he wanted.

Bouncing on his cock, you knew exactly what he meant to say. What Michael couldn't say.

And with Michael shuddering beneath you, unable to even open his eyes, there was a certainty in the air: this would not be the last time.

GENERAL TAGLIST: @suakemi @notanalienindisguiseblink

THE GOOD PLACE TAGLIST: @suakemi @notanalienindisguiseblink

if you enjoyed, please reblog! i promise it makes a difference ♡

@ madwomansapologist.tumblr.

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lynaerith · 10 months

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Chapter 127 and Possibilities for Mikaela's Character Progression

i'm trying to piece together my thoughts on how this is supposed to be developing our understanding of Mika's character, and what this means for his overall character arc.

Time and time again, we witness Mika's selfless actions—and how far he's willing to push himself just to ensure that the people he cares about are safe. We've already seen Mika kill himself on three separate occasions: and each time has been of his own volition and sacrifice.

I saw someone on Twitter mention that perhaps the moral theme of ONS will turn out to be that Yu must learn to let go of Mika, but I don't think this is the case.

Yu has always had a passive role in relation to every time Mika has decided to off himself. As a homunculus, he was kicked out of the fighting area between Mikaela and Paimon; as an empty vessel, he simply waited for Sika Madu to resurrect Mikaela; as a human, he was ordered/forced by child Mika to run away, and then forced to watch vampire Mika give his life to protect him.

In other words, Yu has never had a choice on whether he could "keep" Mika around, because he was never actively partaking in the choice.

Moreover, I think that what this means for our current Mika, is that he must actually learn to be selfish. He must learn to put himself before others.

Every time Mika has died, in one way or another, it was for someone else. Mika choses to die, time and time again, because he has this self-perceived notion that the happiness and well-being of other's whom he cares deeply about is above his own.

I think this also ties into Mika's horrendous self-image and self-worth—which we see mostly when Mika is a vampire, and briefly as a demon.

Of course, this brings up a lot of questions as to why Kagami handeled vampire Mika the way he did for so long, but I digress.

Throughout the entire story of ONS, Mikaela has always been selfless; not just in death, but also in life. He gives himself up to Ferid to provide for his orphan family, he holds Seraph Yu back from killing his squad, he comes to the aid of the Shinoa squad despite quarreling, etc.

So, I think that now—especially because not once do we ever see demon Mika's face in chapter 127 as the entire ordeal occurs—Mika must realize he can't be selfless. He can't just keel over and die for others. He needs to start being selfish and wanting things: he needs to want to live. It's ironic, because Yu even tells Mika when they reunite in chapter 36 that he won't listen to anyone who so easily throws their life away.

Perhaps Mika's learned selfishness will play a key role in ensuring Yu is able to resurrect both humanity and Mika. Selfishness does share a similar weight to the seven sins biblically, and given just how biblical ONS is, perhaps sin itself will aid in the ordeal.

Anyways :') Please feel free to add your own commentary in reblogs/comments, offer your own insights or counterpoints. This is invitation for discussion!

#owari no seraph #seraph of the end #ons #owari no serafu #mikaela hyakuya #chapter 127 #owari no seraph manga

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pokeheadcannons97 · 1 year

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I think i speak for most scarlet and violet players when i say finding out about arvens dog so maybe arven with somebody who cried when they found out his dog was sick

"It's okay buddy... small bites. There ya go."

You watched silently, breath stilled when Mabosstiff gently chewed at the portioned sandwich from Arvens outstretched palm. Taking the time to do as his trainer instructed, and chew ever so slowly. Gently swallowing that bite and he took another one right after.

The dark type was so weak, so close to deaths door, you didn't understand how Arven had the mental strength to go through this.

Though the longer you pondered this, the clearer as the reason why he tried so hard became.

It's no wonder he's trying so hard to find these herba mysticas. That pokemon was his only family that stuck around. The only family member that didn't stay in their research lab instead of raising their son.

Your heart clenched painfully in your chest at the realization, almost too sad to bear. You could feel your eyes begin to fill themselves with tears and you took in a shaky breath.

Raidon murmured emphathetically at your discomfort and nuzzled their head against your head to provide you with some kind of comfort.

Arven made sure Mabosstiff had eaten his share of his food before returning his pokemon to his pokeball for rest. His familiar eyes that were now opened a wonderful sign.

He came to his knees before propping himself back onto a standing position, wiping the dirt off his hands from where he was on the ground.

A small hiccup echoed through out the small cave.

This caught Arvens' attention and he peered down at you. His questioning expression quickly contorting into a worried one laced with surprise.

"Hey, are you okay? Why... why're you crying little buddy?" He asked as he looked your form over, making his way quickly over to you and Raidon. "Wait, did you hurt yourself?" He asked, alarm causing his face to turn to panic as the overthinking began.

You shook your head, tears cascading down your face even more. "No... I'm not hurt. It's just..."

Your hands mindlessly stroked Raidons neck as they laid their head against your shoulder, chattering quietly. Trying to from proper sentences when you were crying was hard.

"I feel so bad for you and for Mabosstiff..." you cried pathetically, your voice coming out small and meek. "I couldn't imagine if my pokemon got so hurt... and Mabosstiff is your family." You added and peered up at his cerulean orbs with your own. "I can't imagine how much pain this is for you. I'm so sorry."

Arven tried several times to from his reply but each time got stuck in his throat as he listened to your display of empathy to him.

Of all people he couldn't wrap his head around. We're you crying over him and Mabosstiff? This was his problem, you shouldn't be crying over him.

You were the one who so graciously accepted his offer to hunt down these herbs and now that they were working, he knew there was a chance. But the display of emotions unnerved him somewhat. He wasn't used to seeing someone get concerned over his behalf. It felt alien, felt off...but.

"Y/N... I..." He spoke quietly.

It also felt like for the first time in his life someone cared. Cared about himself, and about Mabosstiff. And if he was selfish to admit it...it felt comforting.

He carefully placed his larger hand on your shoulder and you looked up at him. "Thank you for worrying about me, and Mabosstiff, but please. Don't be upset, the herbs are working, we know that now." He began with a small smile on his face, eyes kind. "Were so close, do you think we can stick this out together, little buddy?"

Your eyes filled up with even more tears threatening to fall as you nodded. "Absolutely, for both you," you brought your hand and placed it on top of Mabosstiffs pokeball in Arvens hand. "And Mabosstiff."

Arven's eyes pricked slightly at the display but he quickly blinked it away as not to cause you more concern.

"Thank you so much, Y/N."

#pokemon x reader #pokemon arven x reader #pokemon arven

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ruisutea · 4 months

Text

Why can't you love me back? - Capitano ft. Dottore

"You still love [REDACTED], huh..? "

...

Capitano x gn!reader

Angst - gore

CW - implied kidnapping, Stockholm syndrome(?), manipulation, mentions of dead loved ones(s/o), mentions of forced marriage, mentions of needles(or just dottore test subject), OOC(possibly), possible abuse, Capitano and you we're friends, one-sided love. Lmk if I missed any!

How long has this been going on now? You seemed to not recall.

Sitting in a fully equipped room, with a warm bed, and comfortable clothes.

And yet, it is still cold.

You are cold.

He is cold.

And everything that has happened, is cruel and cold. Life seemed to show you no sympathy, even after finding someone to devote your life to. Here you are now, chained to a room that is not yours.

Perhaps this is the consequences of befriending him? He was the one who did this, or in his eyes, you who dug your hole into this.

As your mind was Cluddered with thoughts, you hear the door open. Revealing a large shadow, him, with barely any light from behind.

"Y/n, my dear" he calls out.

You do not respond.

"You can't always act like this"

His voice was stern and cold, anyone could believe with such a stern voice he would be upset. Yet he breaks slightly at your refusal.

"Why won't you look at me?"

You don't dare to move an inch, not wanting to look at your captor, all that fills you when he comes by is disgust, hatred and confusion.

The silence is loud, he only sighs and closes the door walking towards your hunched figure.

"Y/n, I don't want to be your enemy, I just want to love you. Is that so hard to understand? This world, the people, that person you call your fiance aren't as safe as you may think. "

Every word he spat out made you feel sick, always the same excuse. How dare he say such things and calling it corrupt! He's been the one who forced you here, away from your lover, away from the life you had.

"You're so selfish.. " you muttered out, drops of tears slowly running down your cheeks.

You try to keep your composer, but soon you were only just a muttering and crying fool.

"Y/n.."

He held you, tightly. As if he wanted to take out all the air, and even if he would, you'd let him. Death was your only hope, no matter how many times you escaped him, you would always find yourself in the same room with needles and some medical supplies at the side.

"O-off!! Get away from me! " you yelled, squirming around trying to loosen his grip from you.

"Don't you understand Capitano!? I don't love you, I'm already married why can't you move on and be happy for me!? "

Your voice was strained, wanting to say no more, a bit of shock and worrying washed over you.

You said too much.

And his patience had already run thin through your little games. And hearing such words from his one and only.

Before you could do anything, his hands gripped your own, harshly. It hurts. "This is what I mean when I tell you the world is corrupt. "

His frustration making him tighten his grip even more, as if it wasn't enough. He doesn't have anymore time for such games and rejection.

"Y/n why can't you give me the same amount of love that I give to you!? "

His voice echoes through the room.

"I have killed people for you, saved you, helped you, did everything for you. Why can't you see that I'm the one for you?" He continues.

As he stares at you from his armor, more tears begin to drop. Your hands, they feel so numb.

Before you could say a word, he let's go. Standing back up and fixing his posture, he turns away from you.

As he reaches to the door, although not looking back. He once utters a small sentence.

"I hope the next time we meet, you will love me. I'll be sure to ask the Doctor to come help you realize that. "

Jolting up, you run close to the door before Capitano could close it. But it's too late.

"Wait, I'm sorry! Please come back! Please! I-Ill do anything I swear I don't wanna go back there please!-"

The door slams closed, stopping your beggings to continue.

"No, no no no.. " you mutter, hoping, praying he would spare you some sympathy.

But at the end of the day, it will always be the same.

"I advise you next time, y/n, you should be more careful with your words. "

You awake from slumber, a harsh ping hits your head like a person wakening from drinking so much.

With your blurry vision, you look around to see the same lab once more.

"Your very lucky though, " the man continues, to who you know as the doctor.

"If I was your, captor, you'd already be dead" he says, an eerie smile creeps back up.

"Or perhaps, another fine specimen" he adds, before pointing to the person in the large tube floating around a mix of chemicals.

You head turns to see what he's pointing to, only to see your fiance there, with parts of their skin unattached, to where you could not pin point.

You were out of words, and even if you had the courage to speak at that moment, only a sob would come out of your mouth.

If only this was a dream.

It was just quiet until the Damslette came in, letting you come back to reality.

"Good afternoon, doctor" her voice, although angelic, you knew from the others she's quite the deceiver.

"And to what do I owe the pleasure to see you? Ms. Damslette? " They both have a small chat as if it's a normal thing to see a person in pain, and a body afloat.

"Just some stuff to give to you for your, " she pauses, "experiment."

"If it's just that, you should have let my segments take care of such trivial matters. " dottore says, they continue of their small talk.

As they continue, nothing of what they say has quite the interest. You stare at your lovers body, guilt washes over you.

"They never deserved this" you thought.

Your thoughts were only snapped back again when you hear your name being said.

"I will make sure of that" dottore says, letting the women to nod and leave the lab.

Hearing the door close, Dottores back still facing you from the distance, you hear him talk to you again.

"Do you hear that y/n? Your getting married. Sad to say that I won't be seeing you for a while, you were a good test subject, would've been better if you stopped screaming.. " he mutters the last part, before walking off somewhere else in the room.

Likes and reposts are appreciated. Please do not repost any works of mine to any other platform.

#genshin #tiredtealuvr #genshin imagines #genshin fanfic #genshin x you #genshin x gn reader #capitano x reader #capitano #capitano genshin #genshin capitano #damslette #genshin dottore #dottore

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