#i remembered this quote right away ok

[kanthcnys]

“Annabeth was too stunned to move. She felt that if she got any closer to him, all the molecules in her body might combust. She’d secretly had a crush on him since they were twelve years old.” — RICK RIORDAN, The Mark of Athena (2012)

#* #percy jackson and the olympians #percabeth #percabethedit #percy jackson #annabeth chase #pjoedit #percyjacksonedit #dailyflicks #usergal #tuserlucie #userelio #useraurore #userbecca #pjo spoilers #*oh no i`m falling in love oh no* #this scene was so cute #i remembered this quote right away ok

[beefboyandbabygirl]

I ❤️ DILFS / GOOD GIRL (18+)

pairing: student!brother's bff!seokmin x student!good girl!reader

genre: college au, brother's best friend au, smut (MDNI), bit of crack, a small bit of angst but not nearly as much as most of my fics

description: when you head out for college, you incidentally end up at the one your bother's best friend has disappeared to 2 years prior. now, seokmin has promised your brother, vernon, to teach you and take care of you while you're away from home. unfortunately, it seems vernon should have been a bit more specific about what exactly seokmin was supposed to be teaching you.

warnings: vernon is ur overprotective brother, seokmin is not a dilf unfortunately, dirty talk, masturbation (male and female), fingering, slight restraint?, praise (f. receiving), pet names (good girl is so overused), teaching, innocence kink, corruption kink, oral (m. receiving), tiddie play, alcohol consumption, a bit of pining, shame on the readers part, she feels a bit like a slut for a moment, kinda brief mention of miscarriage? for like a metaphor lol, jeonghan is hot in this, giselle is ur bff and i almost gave up my mission and made this whole fic ab her shes so hot, ok i think thats it

quotes my creative director (@joshibambi): "just admit u wanna bang son", "o is for orgasm", "the urge to be the younger sibling for once"

wordcount: 15.9k

a/n: the way this fic took me years to write. i hav been busy :( thank u 2 every1 who liked girl code uve made my whole year :D hope u like this one 2!!

You preferred to remember Seokmin for how he was.

How he was small and young, how he had a swanky bowlcut and how he looked in his school uniform. How he and your big brother, Vernon, had bonded and watched movies together in your living room, and the countless dinners he’d stayed over for, always so respectful to your parents and you. He wasn’t your best friend, he was Vernon’s, and yet he made it so easy to feel comfortable, so easy to feel like you were the one he came over for. 

You crushed on him back then, wrote countless diary entries about him and his stupid, beautiful smile. But it had been so forbidden, you remembered feeling that, because of how Vernon had groaned at you to leave every time you peaked your head through the living room door, masking your insistent eyes on Seokmin with simply wanting to “watch a grown up movie”. Sighing, you’d turn back to your princess pink room, and the boundary - the Vernon shaped boundary - that stood between you and Seokmin grew farther.

It had almost been a relief when Seokmin left for college. That was the most terrible thing, the relief you felt while your brother was grieving the sudden separation with his best friend. But your heart simply couldn’t help but let out a long sigh - years of yearning for him when he was so close by. You felt that cool wash of repose when that border between you and him had disappeared from your view. Years of watching it, wondering whether to pad closer or turn away from it, became a distant memory. For two years you were almost a normal girl and a good baby sister. 

Then it was your turn to head off for college. The nearest, big college to you accepted your application and you still distinctly remember dinner with your parents and your brother, how’d they’d cheered and clinked glasses and looked at you adoringly, because you were growing up right before their eyes. Then under the faint light of the restaurant chandelier, your mom had said something that immediately sent you hurdling back to that old, distant boundary: “Maybe you’ll see Seokmin there!” 

How had you forgotten? You supposed in that time you’d let yourself be more taken with the relief. It was the thought that he would be gone that had distracted you from exactly where to. And there you were with all your moving plans and your packed backs, and your glass raised and frozen in the air and your eyes wide. 

Then came the reasoning: surely, you could avoid him? It was a big college, there were plenty of people. There was no logical reason you’d really have to see him. Except for Vernon, of course. Ever so oblivious, your brother had called up Seokmin to tell him the good news, and to tell him to take care of you and protect you. And Seokmin was so sweet, of course, he’d take care of his best friend’s baby sister. 

And there you were at college. All grown up.

In your defense, you had avoided him skillfully. You’d turned down his request to help you with unpacking, turned down his tour of the school (that you’d actually desperately needed - why is room 240 not with all the other 40’s?!), and most of all, you’d turned down every single message inviting you to a party. 

I guess to him that was a perk; partying with the older kids. He knew you after all. He knew that you were a quiet girl and you stayed within your neatly laid brick walls, and he knew you were shy, and he knew you needed help letting loose. He knew you were a good girl. 

Which is why it wasn’t surprising at all that you turned down his offers - wanting to stay focused on school. At least, that’s what you told him. Truth was even being in his vicinity had put you much closer to that boundary you’d never dared cross. You were afraid even just seeing him would send you hurdling back, like a leaf in the wind. So you didn’t go. 

For a while, at least. 

“This is, like, a once in a lifetime opportunity!” Giselle whined and you shook your head adamantly. “Absolutely not.” 

“Well, maybe not for you, but for me!” she argued. “I can’t believe you’re consistently being invited to parties with hot, sexy men, and you’re turning it down because of one guy!” 

You were currently sitting in the library with your roommate, Giselle, and you’d made the unfortunate mistake of telling her about your predicament after receiving yet another invitation to a party tomorrow. Giselle was throwing a temper tantrum because she had never ever had anything as ridiculous. 

You liked Giselle a lot. She was very different from you - she was hot. You weren’t - you were cute. Giselle held boys on leashes and made them do homework for her. She liked partying and sexy, black dresses. You were a fucking nerd, and cute was the highest compliment you had ever received for your looks. Even though you were different, Giselle had immediately taken a liking to you. You had initially feared she would think you were lame, but she was so nice - except for right now.

“Come on, Y/n, there are, like, no cute guys in our year!” she said pleadingly, clasping her hands together and pouting, but you shook your head.

“You don’t understand, Giselle,” you murmured solemnly, trying to regain your focus on the science textbook in front of you. 

“I understand perfectly well,” she said and you eyed her suspiciously. “I understand that you’re a bitch!” 

“Alright, that’s unnecessary,” you said, closing your book. You pinched the bridge of your nose, when she went on. “No, honestly, Y/n. You’re a virgin, right?” 

You snapped your head towards her in shock. Your eyes darted around frantically, before you leaned over the table to whisper to her: “How do you know that?” 

“Don’t embarrass yourself, honey,” she grinned, holding back laughter and you rolled your eyes, sighing. “And what about it, Giselle?” 

“How are you ever gonna get yourself out there if you’re constantly caught up on this guy and trying to keep away your feelings for him? You’ll stay a virgin forever, girl. You need to look him in the eyes and realize you’re above that childish crush!” 

You stayed quiet, slumped in on yourself with your book in your lap. Why was she making sense? 

You’d never thought about it that way. That your infatuation with your brother’s best friend was somehow holding you back from exploring and evolving as a woman. That maybe having him in the back of your mind every time you’d shyly made out with guys in high school, had been the thing that stopped you in your tracks. 

“I can see it on your face, you know I’m right,” Giselle smiled smugly from behind the screen of her laptop. “Unless you’re asexual. In that case, fierce, but if you’re not, like, get out there, queen. Sometimes you need to realize that you have to leave one dick for another dick because the other dick is so good.” 

You furrowed your brows. “Is.. Is this still about me?” 

“No,” Giselle shook her head.

“Okay, yeah, ‘cause- ‘cause that didn’t..”

“Yeah, I know. I was more so, uh, angling-”

“Right-”

“Angling the story to- to my current situation.”

“I get it, yep.” 

There was a moment of silence. You pursed your lips and looked at the message on your phone. Then you started typing.

“Are you telling him you’re coming with your super sexy, hot friend?” 

“Yes.” 

“Y/N, I LOVE YOU.” _____________________________

Regret was a nasty, old demon on your back and it had twisted and tugged at your guts, while you let Giselle get you party-ready. You’d sat on her bed, in her dress, and having her put her makeup on you, you’d sulked and tried to shrug off your back.

“You look so hot when you actually try,” she’d giggled, using a fluffy brush to spread the bake underneath your eyes.

“Thanks,” you’d mumbled, and she’d paused her movements, frowning.

“What’s wrong?” she’d asked, sitting back on her knees. You had sighed, reaching a hand up to run it through your hair, but pausing midway when you realized you would ruin the styling Giselle had worked so hard on. You lowered your hand again.

“I’m not sure about this,” you’d murmured and she frowned genuinely. “Y/n, I meant what I said. I know I talk a lot about boys and stuff, but you really shouldn’t let yourself be held back by him!” 

Before you could speak again, Giselle had tugged you off the floor to stand in front of her mirror. 

“Look at you,” she’d cooed, clapping your shoulders. “You look so pretty!” 

You’d smiled a little shyly, looking at your form in the mirror abashedly. You were pretty. Not cute, not nerdy; pretty. Curves hugged tight by a sleek, black dress from Giselle’s closet, this was a version of you that could actually see having sex - seducing men, gaining from her looks.

“I guess you’re right,” you’d said sheepishly, and Giselle had smiled sincerely and you’d let her take you to the party down the streets in a nearby frat house, and you’d almost not wavered when you stood right in front of it, music blasting out of every crevice. 

But then you were inside and he was right there. For the first time in two years, he was there, and he was so hot. He was wearing a white tee and a fucking silver chain, and, God, when did he start working out, because his arms were so big and so toned. And his hair was fluffy and dark brown, and his face was slim, and the tops of his cheekbones were shining under the kitchen lamp, where he was talking to some other guy, arm flexed, as he leaned against it on the counter. 

If there was one thing about Seokmin that had stayed the same it was that smile. He wore it now, laughing, as he talked to some blonde guy about something, and you wanted to scream because, there it was. The boundary, the ledge, the line, whatever, it was right before you again, right there with him. And all the feelings that came with it, your heart, wet and red in your throat, a brew of anxiety in your stomach. 

Without sparing even a second, you’d clasped onto Giselle’s wrist, tugging her into a herd of anonymous people, and just walking. Walking, walking, pulling her along (she countered only with a “hey!”) only for you to hit a wall or something, just as long as you were far, far away from him. 

“What the hell?” she said, when you finally stopped walking because you’d entered the living room, which was apparently more exclusive, as only a few people populated it, including a couple that was making out on the far end of the couch. 

“He was there,” you gasped dramatically, as if you’d seen a ghost. “I-I can’t do this, Giselle.” 

“Relax, babe, it’ll be fine. You’re away from him now, aren’t you?” Although she was trying to be supportive, you could tell she was growing a little tired of your theatrics. You couldn’t care less though, you were panting, and peering over her shoulder to see if he was somehow coming towards; and, God forbid, smile at you with that angel grin. 

Giselle followed your gaze and sighed, brows furrowing. “How about I get us some drinks? Then you can let loose a little.” 

You nodded absently, following her lead when she pulled you to sit down on the couch. You clambered to the couch rest, when she walked away, swaying her hips to the music. 

You might’ve looked different, but you were still you. The entire scene had you uncomfortable, and you were still the shy, unconfident and nerdy girl. You cursed yourself for letting Giselle’s reassurances fool you - you would never be this type of person, and you would surely never get over Seokmin. She’d been wrong about everything. 

“You okay, darling?” 

You jumped at the voice, eyes darting up to see who it was. 

You didn’t know him. He was handsome, though, but you’re not even sure you’d call it that. He was pretty, and he had long, black hair and big eyes and he was giving you this teasing smile, that was doing nothing to ease your nerves.

“I’m good,” you squeaked, gaze moving to a nearby pair of shoes in the corner of the room. You heard him chuckle, before he dropped into a squat before you. One lean hand came up to your knee, giving it a squeeze. “You just look so nervous, pretty,” he sat down an anonymous cup of liquor. “I don’t think I know you. Can you tell me your name?” 

The hand on your knee burned into you, thumb brushing back and forth over the skin and he was looking at you so intently, it had you sputtering. “Uhm, uh, Y/n.” 

His thumb froze. You looked over at him curiously to find this dumbfounded expression on his face, devious grin spreading on his pretty features. He chuckled and cleared his throat, face dropping down before he moved it back to look at you again. 

“You’re the girl Seokmin’s always inviting over here?” 

You nodded shyly and he smiled at you. “I’m Jeonghan.” 

“Hi.”

A pause. Jeonghan squeezed your thigh, watching in delight at the way you screwed your eyes shut. 

“You know, I just didn’t expect you to look like this,” he said finally and, sensing your confusion, he teasingly added: “The girl who’s always turning down parties to study.” 

You blush deepened, cheeks furiously rosy, as you fiddled with your fingers in your lap. “I borrowed my friend's clothes,” you breathed, pursing your lips. “Ah!” Jeonghan gently patted the top of your thigh, nodding along exaggeratedly, “You borrowed your friend’s clothes! I see!” 

He studied you while you giggled at his antics, still refusing to look him in the eye, really. He was almost suffocating, his hand on your thigh and his eyes boring into your face, and his cologne in a constant stream in and out of your nostrils. But suffocation, you decided, was almost better than being around Seokmin and having him parade his kind heart and his thick arms and his sweet smile, and just how off-limits he was. 

Ripping you from your thoughts, Jeonghan stood up, placing both hands on the tops of your thighs and bending down to your face, so his nose was buried in your cheek.

“Look at me, darling,” he whispered, then pulled his face away from yours, just enough so you could gaze into his brown eyes. His hands were much higher now, squeezing hard at the plush of your thighs, dangerously close to your center and only separated by the thin fabric of Giselle’s dress. 

“There she is,” Jeonghan smiled, voice a whisper. His lashes came over his eyes, when they flitted down to your lips. “Don’t you wanna come with me upstairs, and I can make you feel really, really goo-”

“JEONGHAN! GET OFF OF HER, THAT IS MY BEST FRIEND’S BABY SISTER!”

There’s a voice you know.

From across the room, Seokmin had burst through the mass of people, now power-posing with an extended finger in the direction of where Jeonghan was tilting over you, rubbing your thighs, as you sat innocently before him. 

Jeonghan stood up, taking all of his heat and his suffocation and cologne with him, groaning and throwing his head back. “Seokmin!” he whined and he was suddenly no longer so suave and seductive. 

“No, I won’t hear it, Jeonghan,” Seokmin said and, as much as you knew Seokmin to be sweet and tender and lovely, there was this crystal-clear anger in his voice. He walked over, one large hand pushing at Jeonghan. “Go get any other girl and sleep with her, just not her. Get your sorry ass out of here.” 

Apparently Jeonghan sensed the same thing you did - a rare anger in Seokmin - because he didn’t put up much of a fight at all, only smiled at you apologetically (and then, when he was behind Seokmin, gave you a small, devious wink - he just couldn’t help himself). 

You couldn’t focus much on Jeonghan at all though. Because Seokmin was standing in front of you, all muscle and huge fucking thighs by your head, and when you dared to tilt your gaze up to him, you saw how all that anger simply melted away. 

“Hey,” he breathed, smiling softly.

“Hey.” 

Then his eyes darkened, if only for a moment, as they traveled over your figure, gift-wrapped in that tight, black dress. His jaw clenched and he looked around for a moment. When he looked at you once more, he was giving you that smile - the one you’d fallen in love with - and the chocolate in his eyes was melting.

“Come on,” he ushered gently, one hand carefully guiding you off the couch. “Let’s go to my room where there aren’t any scary, evil, mean men.” 

Despite being so on edge, so jittery, as you followed him up some distant staircase, you couldn’t help but laugh at those words. He was talking exactly like he had when you were kids. That was how you preferred to remember him; all small and young and with a swanky bowl cut, and he’s the exact same way with you, hand warm in yours, as he guides you through the house. 

“Why’re you laughing?” he smiled, and you suppressed your own, trying not to dwell too much on how fast your heart was beating. “It’s just like before,” you quipped and Seokmin’s hand squeezed yours in understanding. 

He lumbered down the hallway and at its very end, preceded by rows of white oak doors, he opened his own with a twist and a turn of the brass-blend knob. When he closed it, the party became muffled around you, as if his room was filled with water, and now the rest of the world was a garbled mess, and you were drowning.

His room was clean. You supposed Seokmin had never been the messy type - not even when infected by the influence of Vernon. He had a half-open closet, where you spotted folded clothes, and a circle rug and purple and green lava-lamp plugged in on his nightstand. 

Seokmin apparently did not think it was clean enough, because he swooped down gallantly to grab a tossed sweater, smiling at you sheepishly when he held in between his fingers. You stared at him.

You felt like a kid again. Felt like just a young girl, creeping through the crack in the living room door, and looking at his silhouette, outlined by some grotesque horror movie playing on the TV. His sharp nose, when he turned to Vernon and laughed, his hair, all poofed and tousled and scruffy, and his smile. 

And you’d let yourself fall into this trap, maybe to some extent you’d even wanted it. Because now he was right in front of you, and so was that damned barrier, right by your outstretched fingertips, and you could almost envision yourself climbing over it - climbing into his lap and-

“I didn’t think you’d ever come,” Seokmin said gently, a permanent, small smile frozen on his lips. You coughed, unready. “Uh, yeah, my friend- my friend thought I should try and.. You know, get myself out there.” 

Seokmin studied you, bemused and fond, fiddling with the baby blue sweater in his hands. You were looking back cautiously, as if assessing a threat, but the threat was the sweetest, kindest boy in the whole wide world. 

“Yeah, well,” he cleared his throat suddenly, ripping his gaze from you to fold the sweater onto his desk chair. “I’m sorry about Jeonghan, he’s.. You shouldn’t, uh..” Now neatly folded, you saw him rubbing the sweater between his fingers. “You should stay away from him.” 

“Why?” you asked, and it was genuine enough that Seokmin let out a sigh. 

“You’re too much of a good girl to be with him. He’s no good.”

A whimper clawed its way up your throat, bubbled from the depths of your belly, but you tamed it and settled on a light hum. You felt your underwear becoming a little sticky, and you wanted to die, because God, this was your brother’s best friend. They still facetimed every Tuesday and still played Fortnite together over Discord every Saturday. 

“College going good?” Seokmin asked, retreating from the sweater to sit down on his bed. He looked up at you brightly and patted the spot next to him. It felt like another trap, where the folds in the blanket curved down under his weight, and would eventually lead you into him. You sat down hesitantly. 

“It’s okay,” you breathed, folding your hands and in your lap and tensing your shoulders. Seokmin, fully relaxed and slumped, noted your posture and slid his hand over the exposed skin of your back. “Hey,” he whispered, so intimate it hurt your heart, “hey, hey, relax, Y/n. It’s just me.” 

His eyes were soft and full of concern when he spoke quietly again, his voice almost a backdrop to the muffled sounds of dancing college students: “You know, Vernon was really concerned about how you would do away from home.” 

“I’m not doing bad!” you said quickly, dismissing it immediately. Seokmin stared at you. “I just- this isn’t really my scene.” 

His hand felt searing hot on your back, where it slid up and down, almost coaxing you further into him. He hummed. “Yeah, I didn’t think so.” 

Then: “I’m sorry if I made you feel like you had to come. Just figured you might want that street cred of being friends with the upperclassmen.”

You snorted and, cheeks rosy as ever, started giggling, eyes still cemented to the floor. Your hair was falling gently over your face, wisps of baby hair tickling your forehead. 

“It’s okay,” you sighed away the laughter, “You were just trying to get me out of my shell. I appreciate it.” 

Seokmin smiled at that. His hand dropped from your back and you both stared into the expanse of his room. A small window to let in the rain, the moonlight separated by the grid, and the curtain blowing in a solemn breeze. You and Seokmin sat, both very small suddenly, like kids, on the edge of the bed and became speckled in starlight, in diamond-dust. 

Then Seokmin was doing it. He was letting you be comfortable, letting you slip into a dazed joy, intoxicated from his presence. He was asking about your teachers, exams, friends, experiences, and you were both laughing together, and once again you were forgetting that Seokmin was your brother’s best friend, and he was not with you for you, but he was simply talking to you out of courtesy to your brother. He let you forget.

“You going home for the break?” he asked then, room quieted down from all the laughter. The fall break, starting tomorrow, you remembered. You’d thought about going home, but had opted to text your parents that you were staying, wanting honestly to stay in your dorm room and work on assignments and organization and just lull in bed, instead of being taken up, down and everywhere in your hometown. You shook your head. 

“Really? Me neither,” he said, brows raised. “Won’t you get lonely?” 

You giggled shyly. “Maybe a little.” 

“We could hang out,” he breathed, and at that you tasted the boundary between you, felt it firm under your fingertips, because you couldn’t discern whether he was protecting his friend’s baby sister or if he actually liked talking to you, and your heart beat and yearned and hoped for the latter. 

“Yeah, okay,” you nodded, melting when you saw his smile reach his eyes. 

“Didn’t you always like, uh, Mario Kart? You always wanted to play with me and Vern,” Seokmin said, but he was looking distantly into the window. You almost wanted to cry because he remembered you, remembered things that you liked. “I got it on my Playstation, we can play tomorrow.” 

“I’d like that,” you said.

Then Seokmin was loaning you his hoodie, and, bathed in his warm, tender smell, he followed you home under the moon, glaring at Jeonghan on his way out. 

“Keep the hoodie,” he’d said, smiling sheepishly when you stood in front of your dorm door. “It’s cute.” 

He patted your head and left, thankfully before he could see how red your face was, and how you were absolutely about to blow up from unfiltered joy. You shuffled into your dorm room and tried to soothe the basking butterflies in your stomach and your burning heart. 

Was he standing right across from you on that line, waiting to cross? _____________________________

Giselle woke up just early enough to catch you switching between different button-up dresses, throwing one on, looking in the mirror, and deciding to try another. She was groggy and tired and somewhat hungover, and needed to catch a train, so she could get back home. 

“What are you doing?” she cried, rubbing her eyes. You scurried back and forth trying on another dress, considering white tights, then white socks, then adjusting the tone and volume of your blush.

“I’m-” you gasped in between your hard labor, “I’m seeing a boy!” 

This caught Giselle’s attention. She shot straight up in her bed and looked at you with huge eyes. “No way!”

“Yeah way!” you giggled deviously. You turned around to face her. “What do you think of this outfit?” 

“You look cute!” Giselle praised, nodding to your red strawberry dress and your knee-highs. You slumped. There it was again - cute. Not hot, not pretty, but cute. That was what you were; like a child, like the kid Seokmin knew years ago, like his best friend’s baby sister. Nothing more.

“Who is this mystery guy?” Apparently Giselle was too busy rubbing sleep out of her eyes to see how her compliment had deflated you.

“It’s Seokmin. My-”

“Your brother’s best friend?!” She gasped. It was one shock after another from you that morning. “I wanna say I’m disappointed in you, but.. If you pull this off you’re way freakier than me.” 

“We’re not gonna have sex!” you groaned, pouting as you hastily shoved on your shoes. “We’re gonna play Mario Kart.” 

“Right, this cute guy just invited you over for Mario Kart and nothing else, I get it,” Giselle said sarcastically. 

“You don’t know him,” you mumbled defensively, shoes on and now staring at yourself in the mirror once more. “Cute,” the mirror spat at you.

“All men are the same,” Giselle rolled her eyes and threw herself back on the bed. You snorted and began to walk out the door.

“Y/n, wait!” 

“Hm?” 

Halfway out the door, a tote bag slung over your shoulder and ready to step into the sunlight, you peered back into the room. Giselle, in her sweats and hair fussed, stumbled blindly towards the door. She reached into her pocket and produced a-

“A condom?!” you shrieked, outraged. And not just any condom: a condom in white packaging with the lettering “I ❤️ DILFS”. You truly did not understand how Giselle managed to be a caricature of herself time after time.

“You need to wear protection, he’s in a frat, right?” she shrugged. You glared at her. “I’m not bringing a condom.” 

“Alright, I guess,-” Giselle pretended to think, “I guess, you’ll just have to get chlamydia.” 

You stared at her for a moment, bristling. Then you snatched it out of her outstretched hand.

“You’re unbelievable.” 

“You’re a prude.” 

“Goodbye, Giselle!” 

The condom slipped into your tote with ease to lay snug with all your other items and then you were out the door and heading towards Seokmin’s frat house. The sun was dulled by a few clouds, but it was still shining. Leaves were turning brown and red and yellow and were falling from trees to crunch underfoot - everything was lovely.

But the expanse, in your head, was much different. In your head you were traveling the soft dunes of a desert, spotting in the brown and red and yellow horizon a cleft in the sand. When you reached it, wide and long, seemingly endless to each side of you, you were standing right in front of Seokmin’s house.

You weren’t sure how long you stood there, knuckles white where you grasped your tote, and eyes big and heart pounding. What if Giselle was right? Did you want her to be right? Would you even be able to please him if she was? Half-heartedly you tried to push away the images of Seokmin pushing into you, arms flexing on either side of your head, that spawned alongside the thought. Maybe you straddling him, his hands on your ass, his head buried in your chest, or-

“Y/N!” 

You jumped, clutching your bag tight, when you snapped your head up to the voice. It was Seokmin and he was waving at you from his upstairs-window, smiling so brightly you swore the sun reflected off of his teeth. 

“What are you standing there for, come inside! Door’s unlocked!” he yelled, body disappearing in the window. You stared at the window for a moment, his presence now absent, before you nodded to yourself in reassurance. You could do this, right? Just Mario Kart and small talk.

Truth was, you couldn’t do this. Not even in the slightest. You and Seokmin sat cross-legged on his bed, TV on the wall before it, drinking soda and crunching on chips. Seokmin was drenched in a green, fuzzy sweater, collarbones peeking over the rounded neck, and fingers peeking through the sleeves, where he held his controller, and God forbid, his hair was all soft and fluffy, and he was wearing fucking puppy socks. 

And he was competitive, too. He was leaned forward, eyes narrowed as he sped through the course. You huffed when he blue-shelled you, and you tried to refocus.

“I thought you said you were good?” he teased, eyes leaving the screen for only a second to look at you - you, dress bunched up to your thighs and tongue peeking through your pretty, subtly red lips. A second was all that was necessary. 

Suddenly, his character (baby Daisy) swerved off-course, falling into the pit below and he screeched, seemingly genuinely sad, as your character (Toadette) overtook him, the little gold badge popping up in the corner to tell you that you were number one. 

“What were you saying?” you giggled cockily when you finished the last round, Seokmin unable to quite catch up to you in the last stretch. He threw himself back on the bed in defeat, groaning into his hand.

“I can’t believe I let you win,” he cried.

“Let me?” you repeated in disbelief. You scoffed and put down the controller, pretending that Seokmin lying all angelic on his bed sheets wasn’t making your stomach pinch with static. “Pretty sure that was just pure skill on my part. Don’t blame me because you’re bad at Mario Kart.” 

A blow to his talents in Mario Kart was a blow to him. He snapped his head up to look at you, playfully angry. “Oh, oh wow, really? I’m bad at Mario Kart now?” 

“Mhm,” you hummed, smiling cheekily at him. Seokmin studied you for a moment, before he shuffled into a sitting position. His gaze almost made you shy. Did he want to kiss you as much as you wanted to kiss him?

Seokmin shuffled closer to you and you almost stopped breathing: “Don’t I remember you being ticklish?” 

You were almost so caught up in your fantasy to realize what he said. Your eyes widened in realization and you most immediately tried to twist your body away: a punishment was upon you.

“No- NO!-” You cried out but it was too late. Seokmin wrestled his body into yours, fingers dancing and prodding into your sides. Drowning in laughter, your face twisted into tortured pleasure, as you tried to bat his hands away. Your attempts were futile - each time you shuffled away, he followed right with you, fingers unrelenting as your torso twisted and turned. 

"Hehehehehehe- NO, PLEASE!- hehehehehehe!” 

Your knees pushed with all their might and you were almost able to drag yourself to the edge of the bed. There, you could gain distance and talk him down from beyond his desk. But Seokmin was smart. He sensed your escape plan when you squirmed away, and without much thought, he pulled his body on top of yours, weight pinning you down. 

You were still giggling and squirming, when his fingers finally let up. You were both panting from the excitement, Seokmin smiling down at you adoringly. Then, both of your smiles dropped.

It was like it took a few moments to realize; he was straddling you. Hips pushed into yours, all his weight rested on your crotch - your crotch, which was now pulsating. To make matters worse, the skirt of your dress had ridden up and most of your plush thighs were now visible to him, and your chest was halfway out of your dress, and your cheeks were flushed and your hair was spread out on the sheets beneath you. Seokmin seemed unsure of where to put his hands, while you both stared at each other, breathing in the thick, heavy silence.

“I’m sorry-”

“It’s okay, I-” 

“I really- I don’t know what-” 

“Don’t worry-” 

You were pulling down your dress again, cheeks literally flaming red and bottom lip caught between your teeth. Silence swallowed you both whole. 

You wanted him back on your hips so bad. It hurt. You were aching in quick pulses, but you couldn’t even look at him. Surely, you thought, surely, he’d seen that look on your face, how your eyes clouded over with lust. Maybe he felt disgusted. 

“I better-” you hiccupped, voice small, “I better go.” 

Seokmin, eyes peeking at you through his lashes, feared he made you uncomfortable.

“Yeah, of course,” he mumbled.

You gathered your things and ran out of there, wetness gushing out of you. You tried to run, tried to create distance, but this time, in your mind’s eye, you ran in place, staying completely still by the cleft separating you and Seokmin. You fiddled with the edge, sand cascading into the empty, endless dark. 

There was no way you could make that jump.

That night you wished Giselle was by your side. You wrote an assignment, trying to ward off the embarrassment that stormed in your brain, when you got a message, that plunged you into rock bottom:

Lee Seokmin: hey you forgot smth at my house lol

Lee Seokmin: *Image Attached*

This was it. You were going to jump off a bridge (or a cleft in a dry, sandy wasteland).

As if your life couldn’t get anymore embarrassing: it was the condom. The white condom with “I ❤️ DILFS” on it. You damned that woman for ever making you bring it. What must he have thought of you? His best friend’s little sister trying to get in his pants? Your cheeks were burning and you threw your head into your pillow and screeched. Your life was over. It had simply ended now. There was no coming back from this. You huffed and removed yourself from its plushness. 

Maybe you could salvage it? Thinking on your feet, you replied:

You: OMG i’m so sorry!!!! i think that’s my roommate’s, she must’ve put it in my bag… :/ 

You: I’ll come pick it up ASAP :(((( 

You stared at your phone at the blatant. It was not a far stretch from the truth, but being caught with your hand in the cookie jar - or maybe more so the I ❤️ DILFS condom in your tote bag - it seemed like an irrationally shitty cover up. 

You gnawed at your lip when the three dots popped up next to his picture, and bit it to pieces waiting for his reply. You almost jumped when your phone buzzed:

Lee Seokmin: hahahahaha

Lee Seokmin: you can come pick it up tomorrow if u want? theres no rush 

You glared at the message. Laughter? Surely he hadn’t bought it. He was just trying to be nice, just trying to avoid you any embarrassment. The thought made you wanna throw up, how he felt this obligation to be nice to you when you had permanently scarred him (were you being dramatic?).

You: ok. im rlly sorry again!! i’ll pick it up tomorrow _____________________________

Tomorrow came much faster than you had hoped. No amount of tossing and turning could slow down the passage of time, and by the time you received Seokmin’s promised “I’m awake”-message, the embarrassment hadn’t faded one bit. 

Every discouraged moment of getting ready was haunted by your current situation, and you stopped to cringe every five seconds, causing an honest and diligent self-hatred to bubble within you. When you knocked on Seokmin’s door, you’d honestly never felt less confident in your life.

“Y/n!” he said enthusiastically. 

“Seokmin,” you said, less enthusiastic. 

He smiled at you sweetly, almost as sympathetically, before stepping aside. You furrowed your brow, not really understanding why he couldn’t just hand it to you at the door, but stepping inside nonetheless. “It’s in my room,” he offered, but could he not just have brought it with him? Did he have to prolong the shame even further? You followed him to his room.

In that moment you hated Seokmin for being who he was; for being sweet, gentle, caring, and gentlemanly. You would feel less pathetic if he yelled at you, if he was genuinely disgusted and wanted nothing to do with you. But there he was all smiling and supportive, and he wasn’t touching you at all, but he still felt like pillars on your back, soothing you and holding you up. 

“It was your roommate’s?” he asked absently as you traversed the halls. “Uh, yeah,” you answered sheepishly. 

“I can tell,” he threw his head back to you, and there was a huge grin on his face. A little bit of hope blossomed in your chest. “Yeah, I saw her at that party, you know? I think she slept with, uh, my friend, Minghao.” 

“That’ll be her,” you were smiling now too, and a huge wave of relief washed over you, as he at least let you believe that he thought it wasn’t your perversion bringing along that condom. 

Finally stumbling into his room, he did indeed pick it up from his desk, handing it back to you. You looked at it in his outstretched hand and blushed sheepishly. “Thanks,” you squeaked. 

Seokmin nodded in response. For a moment the two of you stood, uncertain of what to do and caught in the web of a terribly awkward silence. Seokmin’s eyes darted to the window and yours to the floor. 

“Hey, uh,” he giggled a little, scratching the back of his head. “I feel really bad for losing that Mario Kart game-”

You scoffed in response, but the facade of being peeved was falling apart, as you beamed up at him. 

“Maybe we could do, like, a quick rematch?” 

You shrugged, trying to be nonchalant with an ever-heavy flush in your cheeks: “I don’t back away from a challenge.” 

Seokmin won the rematch. This only spurred on another rematch, and suddenly there was no end to the madness. This time there was no awkwardness, no lingering silences. You were just giggling and strategizing, and throwing heat in the direction of your opponents. 

That uncomfortable, clamoring feeling left you, slowly. It became easy to forget it. That feeling that he was only there with you because of Vernon, that there was always some sort of demand, a twisting hand, forcing him upon you, and that you became a sort of burden on him. That was the thing about Seokmin, though, his ability to make you feel like his best friend; his ability to make him feel like he was there for you, even when he wasn’t.

It was only after an hour and a half or so, when Seokmin paused the game. 

“What the hell, Lee? I was just about to beat you!” you whined, crossing your arms. He nodded along, pushing himself off the bed. “Yes, I agree, which is why I’ve assessed that I need a refreshment.” 

“Oh, you’ve assessed?” 

“Yeah, I’ve assessed that I need a fresh, cooling drink in my gullet.” 

You both laughed a little and slumped back, dropping the controller. Seokmin smiled at you, eyes twinkling. “You want one?” 

“What are you getting?” 

“A beer,” Seokmin said. Rationally, you knew you shouldn’t accept. You were bad with alcohol, and everytime you drank just a little, a little easily became a lot. That was why you took yourself by surprise when your voice left your mouth, chipper and grand: “Sure!” 

One beer turned into another, and Mario Kart turned into talking on his bed, slumped into his fortress of pillows and giggling at his stories. You were a little tipsy, halfway into your second beer and your face was flushed and Seokmin was lying on his side, hand propped up under his head, as he made you laugh again. 

“Your kind of partying sounds… Extreme,” you murmured, rim of the bottle pushed against your lips where your words slightly slurred. Mario Kart and alcohol had gotten you a little out of your shell, and now you and Seomin were talking like friends - as if your brother didn’t even exist. You basked in the alcoholic buzz and in this reality, this hideout, where your lovely brother didn’t exist and the faint ache in your legs at Seokmin’s godly face in the bedside lamp wasn’t so utterly misplaced. 

“I think anything’s more extreme than your partying,” Seokmin mused teasingly. You huffed, putting down your beer and smoothing over your skirt. Everything was so lovely and artificially yellow and his body beside yours radiated pleasant heat. He was beautiful, you thought, looking at how the sweaters pooled on his torso and how his brown hair looked so soft and messy. You almost felt the absence of ground beneath you, when you imagined yourself at the cleft again.

“You don’t know about my kind of partying,” you joked and he chuckled softly. “You’re right, I shouldn’t make assumptions.” 

You looked at him and he was suddenly serious. The smiley, gooey Seokmin was gone and his eyes, although not threatening at all, were prodding at you. Your smile fell. The alcohol at this time felt misplaced and wrong, the lightness felt wrong.

“Were you gonna, you know, go with Jeonghan at the party?” he whispered. The world was suddenly very quiet, as if it were following Seokmin’s tact. You grimaced a little. “No. No, not really.” 

He studied you. You couldn’t bear to meet his eyes, opting to look at your hands in your lap. “Why not?” 

A pause.

You began to pick at your own fingertips, nails digging into the cuticles. Seokmin’s eyes dragged from your face to your hands, and he scooted closer to you, only to cover your hand with his, stopping your movements immediately. Suddenly so close, his voice was whispered right in your ear, so soft and so gentle, it felt like a kiss: “Don’t do that.” 

You sucked in a breath, hands ripping to your sides to lay stiff. “I’m, uh, I’m not that experienced, so I..”

Your eyes flicked up to gauge his reaction. In your worst nightmares, you imagined a laugh breaking onto his face, maybe disgust, but you felt yourself melting. He looked at you so softly, like you were the most precious, fragile thing and his hand had stilled in the air after you pushed it off, as if, like the most enchanting artwork at a museum, he fought desperately not to reach out and touch you. 

It was unbearable - how still the air had become, how heavy you felt, how your chest struggled to expand. You talked again, if only to fill the air with your babbling: “I’ve not had.. I mean, I can hardly get myself off… So. I probably. Couldn’t. Get him off.” 

You realized about halfway through your sentence that you should not have said that. That last half of your sentence was a breathy mess, as your voice became shaky with humiliation. His gaze, a delicate constant, was not helping either. You felt tears welling up in your eyes suddenly and maybe that was the worst part. 

“You have trouble getting yourself off?” he repeated, as if to make sure. “Like masturba-” 

“Yeah, that,” you squeezed your eyes shut. You couldn’t tell if you wanted him to shut up forever, so you’d never have to know his reaction, or if you wanted him to talk and be able to sense how this information changed his perception of you. His voice came, in spite of whatever you had hoped.

“I figured you were a virgin,” he mumbled, voice half muted by the palm of his hand, “but I thought you at least masturbated-” 

“I do!” you defended yourself, voice much louder than his and brows furrowing and tears threatening to spill over your eyes. “I’m just- I’m not that good at it.” 

“Hey,” he said softly, hand landing on your arm. You immediately shut up, lip trembling when you struggled to meet his eyes. “Relax, Y/n. It’s okay. I’m not judging you.” 

You nodded half-heartedly, still incredibly uneasy. 

“If you want…” Seokmin’s voice trailed off. His eyes ventured over your form briefly, licking his lips. “You know, if you want, I could teach you.” 

You looked at him silently. He seemed to snap out of whatever loopy trance he had been sucked into, because he was suddenly very jittery and scrambling through the bedsheets. “Uh, I mean- you don’t- God, I’m sorry- it was only if-” 

“Yes,” you said. His scrambling stilled immediately. His eyes were teacups. 

“You sure?” 

You nodded, not trusting your own voice. 

Seokmin squeezed his eyes shut, gulping as he sat back against the bed. His legs spread apart. “Come here,” he patted his thighs. 

You felt terribly sober. All that buzz and butterflies and blaze and blossom was gone and you felt like a doll, moving each limb individually, as you climbed into his lap, back to him. You were unable to think, unable to truly process what was happening, what it meant, as you felt his form engulf yours.

His hands found purchase on your hips and his breath was warm on your neck, as you felt every ridge of his abdomen on your back. His thumbs rubbed against your hip bone. 

“Okay, now show me how you usually do it,” his voice was a warm hum, a twinge of nervousness laced in it. Your face was lit ablaze and you squirmed in his hold, when one hand left your hip to gently push your legs apart. You sat, all open and held against him, dress keeping you covered.

“It’s embarrassing,” you huffed, being very serious, but Seokmin smiled and nosed your hair gently. 

“We can stop whenever you want, seriously, if you get uncomfortable, we stop” he reassured. 

“It’s just me.” 

It was. It was just Seokmin, your brothers best friend, the sweetest boy in the world, who used to have a swanky bowl cut and dorky school uniform and who was always Vernon’s most respectful friend, but he was hot and whispering into your ear and one hand was massaging the outside of your thigh. 

“Should I take my dress off?” you breathed, face turned halfway back to him. His hands squeezed at you in response and you could faintly make out his tongue sliding over his lips. 

“Only if you want, angel,” he whispered back, rubbing your sides tenderly. “We’re not doing anything you don’t want. Whatever makes you feel good. ‘M just here to help.” 

You nodded, and although the answer was maybe made to make you keep your dress on - a reassurance that there was no need to discard it - you removed yourself from his grasp, hands coming to tug your dress off. You felt a small boost of confidence when you heard Seokmin breathe out: “Shit.” 

Only in your bra and panties (terribly mismatched, your bra was black and your panties were pink), you leaned back into his hold, and you noted how Seokmin’s warm hands were much more careful now, splaying out on your bare skin. 

“Are you comfortable now?” he asked quietly. You nodded. He propped his head up on your shoulder, eyes cast down your almost-nude body, chest rising and falling. Your legs were closed again, he noticed, and his veiny hand reached down to open them again. “Show me how you do it, baby, so I can help you improve.” 

You gummed your lip, breathing in one last time, before your nervous fingers began dancing their way to your panties. They disappeared under the fabric for only a moment, before Seokmin spoke again.

“Sweetheart,” he tutted, hand wrapping around your wrist to stop its track. “Don’t just dive right in, you need to get yourself all hot first.” 

Your brows furrowed and some of the embarrassment you felt from being this exposed and pressed into Seokmin evaporated into genuine confusion.

“What? What do you mean?” you said, somewhat outraged, and Seokmin couldn’t help the laughter blooming in his chest at that. He vibrated against your back, hands smoothing down your arm. You pouted: “Don’t laugh at me, Minnie.” 

He stopped, still smiling as he nosed your temple. “I’m sorry, baby,” he whispered, pressing a kiss to your head, that had your heart beating out of your chest. “You’re just so cute.” 

Cute. You remembered your disdain for that word, but somehow, when it came from his lips, it made you beam. Everywhere he touched left behind a hot, burning ghost on your skin.

“You just have to touch your body, sweetheart,” he said sweetly. You thrashed in defiance, crying out quietly with red cheeks. Wiggling your body angrily, you felt his dick half-hard in his pants against your lower back. 

“Can’t you do it?” you whined, wanting nothing more than for him to take over and make you feel good. He sucked in a harsh breath behind you, fingers wrapping around your hands to soothe you still. He seemed to debate your proposal, but eventually he kissed your shoulder and spoke: “Okay, baby, but you have to show me you understand, alright?” you nodded feverishly. “We’re trying to get you to learn.” 

The whole thing had you dizzy, warm and gooey in his hands, and grounding yourself on his solid torso. You had tunnel vision, unable to focus on anything but his warm hands and sweet voice, and how fucking hard he was. You leaned your head up to look at him pleadingly. Even upside-down he was pretty. He giggled at your starstruck expression.

“Look at my hands, pretty,” he tapped your nose and you scrunched it, turning down to your own body, where he sat his hands on your waist. “You do it like this.” 

His hands started dragging over your skin, creating constellations of ghosts on your skin. One dragged across your stomach and down your leg, squeezing it along the way, and the other brushed over your bra-covered chest, landing on your shoulder and collarbones. Then they moved oppositely, then diverged from their chosen paths, and you started breathing heavily. Pressure built up in your stomach and your panties, and you felt how slick started leaking out of you. 

“Feel good?” Seokmin grinned against your neck, listening to the melody of your panted gasps. You nodded earnestly, moaning softly. Seokmin furrowed his brows at that noise, pressing kisses to your neck appreciatively. “Good girl. Such pretty sounds.” 

Both of Seokmin’s hands dragged up to your ribs. There, they paused. “Can I touch your chest, baby?” 

“Please,” you whimpered, and earned another sloppy kiss to the cheek. His hands immediately grabbed ahold of your chest, softly rubbing it over your bra. 

“Does that feel good?” he whispered. You hesitated for a moment. “Um, I don’t feel much, honestly.” 

You’d expect him to be a little angry or defensive, but Seokmin only hummed and nustled himself into your hair. “Good girl. Good girl, being so honest with me. So pretty.” 

You whined at his praise and Seokmin smiled smugly, taking notice of how heated you got from his words. 

“The- the fabric is in the way..” you whimpered meekly, and Seokmin nodded in understanding, stroking your sides soothingly. 

“You want to take off your bra?” he hummed, truly as if it would not expose you to him, as if it weren’t a lewd and depraved scenario, but something as simple as the weather. You nodded, removing yourself from the harbor of his arms once more to remove it. You unclipped it and threw it God knows where, before settling back into him. Seokmin peeked over your shoulder at your now bare breasts, groaning a little and covering it up with a cough. This was about you. 

Seokmin placed his hands on your tits again, massaging and rubbing the soft skin, before he brushed his thumbs over your hardened nipples.

You moaned - for the first time it was a clear moan, seething from your throat and puffing into the air. “Sound so pretty,” he muttered in your ear. “You really like that, hm?”

He pinched your nipples between his fingers, your back arching into his warm hands. Then, as soon as the pleasure had begun, it stopped, when his hands came to rest on the bed. You whined, twisting your head towards his, only to be stopped by fingers on your chin, turning you back forward. “Show me you can do it now, baby. You’re learning,” he reminded you.

 “But, Minnie, I want your hands,” you whined and he tutted softly in your ear. “I know, baby, but I need to know that you’re understanding this in that pretty little head of yours. Need to know you’re focusing. Come on, show me now.” 

Huffing, you placed your own hands (they somehow felt more foreign than his now) on your stomach and began to mimic his movements. You smoothed them up and down on your body, squeezing, then placed them on your chest, rubbing and pinching your nipples. 

“There you go,” he praised, and his hands had traveled to your shoulders, massaging them gently. You whimpered and turned your head to him again.

“Can you teach me how to touch my…” you trailed off.

“Your pussy?” he offered, as if it was nothing, as if it wasn’t vulgar or lewd. You nodded vigorously. Feeling him gulp a little, his hands became a little unsteady as they came to hold your waist again. “Can I hear you say it? Baby?” he asked and suddenly his voice was a little shaky, a little breathless. 

“Can you touch my pussy now, Minnie?” you asked, and any shame had been clouded over with lust. You’d never been this burningly bothered in your life, you needed him to touch you. He groaned, and this time he was unable to cover it up. You felt how his hard cock strained against his sweatpants, how it pressed into your back, and you wanted to touch it so bad. 

“Alright, baby, want your panties off?” His sharp nose was pressed into your hair. You shook your head. “Want them on.” 

He nodded. “Alright, jus’ tell me if you wanna stop, okay? I’m gonna touch you now.” 

His hand slipped under the waistband of your panties, disappearing under the pink fabric. As if they were always meant to be there, his fingers slipped through your folds, coming down to circle your slit in impossibly light figurations. 

“Shit,” he panted, grip on your waist suddenly bruising, as he tried to steady himself. “You’re so wet, baby, you like Seokminnie that much?” 

“Yeah, I do,” you nodded blindly, your own hands coming to grip onto his thighs. His middle finger danced upwards and pressed against your clit, and you immediately squeaked and shut your legs around his hand. 

“No, no, baby, don’t do that,” he frowned, hand that wasn’t buried in your pussy spreading your legs again. You felt how his legs, pressed against you, came to hook onto yours, forcing your legs apart with his own strength. He hummed in content. 

His finger pressed onto your clit again, and he felt how your legs tensed, straining against his to close. Your back arched and you moaned, eyes squeezed shut. He began rubbing it, and it was so intimate, how close you were to him, how his hand navigated your sopping wet pussy, fingers just rubbing you gently, and how bare you were, his eyes training over your bouncing tits when you thrashed. 

His fingers moved downwards again, gathering the wetness that was gushing out of you. Then, one long middle finger pushed into you. Canting into his hand, you moaned loudly and turned your head into his neck. Nosing the tan skin and inhaling his faint cologne, you began mindlessly kitten-licking the skin. His Adam's apple bopped under your tongue.

“You’re so tight,” he rasped, beginning to slowly push his finger in and out of you. His other hand had come to wrap around your waist in an attempt to calm the sudden bucking of your hips against his hand. 

His hand moved faster, obscene, wet sounds coming from your ruined underwear, where he worked diligently into your pussy. He slipped another finger in, and you cried from the stretch. It was becoming hard to contain you, thrashing and writhing against his hold, stuck between wanting to move closer and to move away entirely. His fingers tied a knot in your stomach.

“That’s right, pretty, tell me how good Minnie’s fingers feel,” he whispered hoarsely above your ear. You could almost only whine and moan, nipping at his neck a little. “Tell me or I’ll stop,” he warned.

“Feels so good!” you whined immediately, because if he stopped now, you figured you might start crying. “Feel so, so, so good, fuck, Seokmin, I’m-” 

“I know, baby, I know, but I’m teaching you, right?” 

Though your mind was fuzzy, you sensed what these words meant and panicked, hand coming down to grip his wrist in an attempt to hold him in place. “Please, please, please, Seokmin, don’t stop, please, don’t stop!” 

“Don’t talk back to me, sweetheart. I won’t stop, just talk to me. Tell me what you feel me doing,” pushing your head up again, Seokmin pressed his face against your cheek, so hard, you felt his humid pants against it. 

Your mind was so hazy, so transfixed on the feeling in your stomach and his finger in your pussy, you could hardly respond. 

“Tell me or I’ll stop, baby,” he reminded you again, and you scrambled frantically to focus. 

“Nngh! You’re- pushing in and out-” your voice broke, hips stuttering against his hand, that was continuing its remorseless pace. 

“Yeah, and?”

You furrowed your brows, lips trembling. “You’re- you’re curling them- A-ah!” 

“That’s right. Such a good girl. So smart and clever for me,” Seokmin whispered happily, his other hand slipping down your stomach to circle your clit. Both his hands working pleasure into your pussy, you cried out loudly, head pushed back into his chest.

“Just let go, baby, I can feel you clenching on me so hard. Wan’ me to stay in your pussy forever, hm? Just let go, cum whenever you want, wanna see your pretty face so bad,” somehow Seokmin was just as intoxicated off of lust as you, despite staying, hard and untouched, in his pants. But he babbled mindless praise to you, and you came to his sweet voice whispering in your ear.

Your orgasm sent you hurdling over the edge - the edge, the one you’d been standing at hopelessly for years. You flew across it and landed on Seokmin’s territory; in his arms. 

“Seokmin, a-ah!” you cried, releasing all over his fingers, coating them in your cum. Your entire body arched upwards, as you moaned into the night. Seokmin rode you through your high, pressing sweet kisses into your hair.

You fell limp against his body, worn out, when he finally retracted his fingers from your pussy. You snuggled into his sweater with a content hum. 

Seokmin smiled down at you, eyes brimming with fondness, as his cum-slicked hands wrapped around your torso in a hug, holding you into him. “You did so well,” he whispered genuinely. 

You looked up at him with a tired smile. “Thank you, Seokmin.” 

He held himself back from saying he would do that a thousand times over, in fact, he wouldn’t mind never pulling out - he could live with only one hand. Instead, he pressed a kiss to your forehead and whispered: “Of course, darling.” 

Your brows furrowed and you pulled yourself away from him a little, eyeing the tent in his pants worriedly. “Do you want me to-” 

“No,” he shook his head decidedly. “No, I’ll take care of it.” 

You looked at him with big, innocent eyes, that only furthered the throbbing of his cock. Partially, he wanted to give in so badly. The thought of your hand around his cock, all pouty and innocent and confused, and how heavy it would be in your small hand, had made him cum more times than he’d like to admit. But, he reminded himself, this was about you. This was a favor. “Are you sure?” you asked softly.

“Yes, baby, go to bed. I’m gonna go get you some fresh clothes.” 

You snuggled into bed while Seokmin scurried away to fetch a shirt and some boxers, and when he came back you cooperated limply in taking off your panties, and putting on what he’d given you. You fell asleep in his bed, cuddling his duvet, and surrounded by his scent. 

Seokmin watched you in adoration. How peaceful you looked, chest rising and falling, and a little pout on your lips. 

He wandered through the house, trying simultaneously to get as far from you as possible, and also trying to decide which of his housemates he currently hated the most. He landed on Jeonghan, slipping into his empty room and settling himself on the bed.

There, he fisted his solid fucking cock and bucked into his own hand, eyes squeezed shut to remember how you looked under his hands, how you begged for him, how well you listened, what a good girl you were for him. His moans were trembling and muffled by his own hand, and when he came, he felt momentarily smug, looking at how it dripped over Jeonghan’s sheets (served him right). Then, post-nut clarity sank in, as he reentered his own room and cuddled into you on the bed. 

He felt almost despicable. He felt gross and evil and perverted and lewd, not because of you, but because, as if it were his first time realizing it, he remembered that you were Vernon’s sister. He remembered that he had promised to protect you from manipulative guys and always watch over you, and help you if you needed help, and report to Vernon if you were acting weird. Yet here he was, letting you cum on his hand and groping your tits, as if he was still that teenage boy with that swanky bowl cut. 

After an hour of chewing on his lips and frowning, Seokmin let your sweet perfume lull him to sleep. He dreamt of you. _____________________________

There’s a blissful instant that morning when you wake up, curled into Seokmin’s arms, head nuzzled in his chest. There’s a blissful instant when you tilt your head, staring at his sleeping face, and he’s so beautiful, features all soft and breathing rhythmically. There’s a blissful instant where you see him, and your heart weeps in your chest because he’s so gorgeous.

Then it’s gone.

A panic button is pressed in your head, and your nerve-endings, each one resting on him, begin burning. What had you done? Yesterday feels like a faraway dream, but he’s still wearing that sweater and it grounds you in the reality of what had happened. 

You’re lost. What did this mean for the two of you? Was Seokmin just lusting after you? But that couldn’t be right, you thought, because he’d insisted on only helping you, refused your offers to help him, which now was making you rot in his arms with guilt. Was this genuinely an attempt to help you? To be diligently by your side at the request of your brother? But surely this had been outside of the realm of what was acceptable to help your best friend’s baby sister with? Did that mean he liked you? 

Seokmin awakened from your sudden squirming, as if, with enough shaking and turning, that feelings and thoughts would just fall out of you. They didn’t, they stayed right where they were, and all you were given in return was Seokmin’s eyes fluttering open. 

You watched him go through that same process; the bliss came first and then the panic. Seokmin’s eyes went from adoring to wide and grave and suddenly he was shuffling away from you on the bed, creating a cool distance between you on the landscape of his mattress. You didn’t miss the pink dusting his cheeks.

“Uh- good morning,” he mumbled, and he could only look at his hands. Your throat was unbelievably dry. “Morning.” 

You’re not sure how you both managed, but you went through that morning without mentioning the previous night even once. The air was thick with tension, fleeting glances, and shaky hands, while Seokmin made you both bowls of oatmeal. You stood on the other side of the counter in his shirt and his boxers. 

You ate in his bed. It was silent and heavy and each clink of spoons against the bowl-rims had you both wincing. He put on a TV-show and you sat across from one another, chewing wordlessly to some drama in the background. Your belly was pooling with tension and light cascaded onto you, revealing your pores and flaws. Were you a bad person?

Finally, finally, Seokmin put down his spoon with yet another clink, fingers catching the bridge of his nose and eyes squeezing shut. He huffed into the palm of his hand, swallowing the oatmeal hard. 

“Uh-” he began and his voice cracked, “Y/n. About last night-” 

But you cut him off, and he couldn’t ever, even in his wildest dreams, have imagined that these words would come out of your mouth:

“I want to return the favor.” 

The words were almost spat and discarded, as if they’d been sitting on the tip of your tongue all morning with a foul taste, and you’d only now been able to rid yourself of it. Seokmin snapped his head towards you, a genuine surprise on his face, but he soon wished he hadn’t looked at all. 

You were so pretty, sitting cross legged in his shirt and a blush creeping up your neck and cheeks all shiny in the morning sun. And there was this innocence to your eyes, big lashes shadowing it only a little; this earnestness that told him you really, really wanted to do this for him.

“I-” he chuckled a little, heart clenching at your sweetness, “I can’t ask you to do that.” 

“Well, it’s good that I’m asking you then,” you said, and though the comment was witty, when Seokmin looked at you again, he saw how careful you looked, and how unsure you were of yourself. 

“Listen, N/n,” he reached out to grab your hand, and it was burning into yours, each area of adjoined skin screaming at you with reminders of last night. “You don’t have to do that. I just wanted to make you feel good, I was happy to just be of service to you-” 

“But I want to make you feel good,” you pouted, almost brattily. Seokmin’s gentle expression and tone faded into something darker, as his eyes flitted down to your exposed legs and your heaving chest. He swallowed, putting away his bowl of oatmeal and collecting himself. 

“Are you sure? You need to be absolutely 100% sure-” 

“I’m sure, Minnie. I want to-” you broke off your own words with a squeak, face becoming bright red. You leaned in self-consciously, as if to tell him a secret: “I want to suck your dick.” 

Your whispered admittance had him groaning, groaning at how sweet and innocent your voice was, how you couldn’t even say it loudly, you had to whisper the dirty word to him. He wanted you so badly, wanted to be the one to take away your innocence, to make you all dirty and beg for him, to make you thrash and whine and to teach you how to really feel good. He wanted you.

It’s like a switch had flipped, when Seokmin put his hand on the back of your head, and suddenly you were kissing again. The tension from before was replaced with something wholly different, something hot, something laced in the eye contact he gave you, before he leaned it again. 

And Seokmin was kissing you with a fervor that you recognized from yourself - you both wanted to forget. Wanted to forget Vernon, who, although a great brother and friend, had become a heavy strain on your relationship with Seokmin. So you kissed him and let his tongue in your mouth when it swiped over your bottom lip, and you sucked on it, and you let him and yourself get lost in each other.

The sound of smacking lips and saliva was so lewd too, especially when Seokmin’s hand pulled you from your spot on the bed and into his lap, hands roaming your body, while you tangled into his hair. He was half-moaning into your mouth by the time he pulled away, face flushed and eyes darker and lower and lips swollen red. 

“You gonna let me use that pretty mouth, baby?” he whispered against your lips, one hand palming over his cock through his boxers. You nodded, almost desperately, one hand reaching out to his in his lap. “Can I touch it?” 

Seokmin smiled fondly, looking down at where your small hand was outstretched towards his cock. “Yeah, baby, go ahead.” 

You were a bit clumsy at first, but soon enough you found its outline in his black boxers and you squeezed it a little. Seokmin crooked over, groaning into your shoulder. You felt him get harder and harder against your palm, a small smile at the desperate noises he was making. 

Seokmin had laid his cheek on your shoulder, neck twisting to stare up at you, while you focused solely on touching him, and he hated himself for getting even harder because it was you - you, who he had wanted for so long, who he was hugged into and lying on, while you touched his warm cock.

“You’re so pretty,” he whispered, breathing heavily, and then smiling brightly when you became all sheepish, smiling and looking away, so that you had to pause your actions. He nosed into your neck, regaining some semblance of control over the situation, now that you weren’t touching him, and his breath was warm and humid on your skin. He pressed small kisses up to your jawline, nose flattening against you.

“So, so pretty. Fuck, imagining you with my cock in your mouth, all drooling and shit. Fuck, baby, you gonna let me fuck your mouth?” he rambled, hands finding home on your tits again. You whined and nodded, trying to pry him off of you. Immediately (forever struggling with a little concern that you might’ve changed your mind) he pulls away, looking up at you worriedly. 

“Don’t- don’t touch me, I don’t wanna get.. All hot,” you whispered those words that he had said last night, biting your lip in worry. “I want to do it now.” 

Seokmin melted completely, and in a complete inability to contain his adoration, brushed hair out of your face and pressed a million kisses to your cheeks and your nose. “Okay,” he said in between kisses, and you felt his smile on your skin, “okay, baby. But if it gets too much, tap my thigh three times, okay? If you need anything, if you feel uncomfortable.” 

“Yes, yes,” you huffed, pushing yourself away from him and hopping onto the floor, sinking to your knees before the bed. 

It felt completely unreal - to both of you. How you were suddenly on your knees and how he settled in front of you, bare, thick thighs on either side of your head. Everything was all light and all the places he’d kissed and touched had become holy and glowing on your body. He shimmed his boxers off and you gaped at the sudden exposure of his dick. 

He was hard. Apparently the kissing and groping had been enough, because it slapped against his sweater, leaking silky white liquid from the tip. And he was big - you didn’t exactly have a good point of reference, but you vaguely sensed from Giselle’s words that this was quite a feat. 

And actually seeing it brought a wave of uncertainty on you, not as to whether or not you wanted to do it, but how. So, you blinked up at him with a small frown, voice small when you spoke: “Seokmin.. How- how do I do it?” 

Seokmin practically glowed with adoration, when he petted your head and rubbed your cheek, seemingly so comfortable despite being totally bare. “You just put your lips around it and suck, baby, it’s easy,” he said softly, then added, a little panicked: “And be mindful of your teeth.” 

“But it’s so big,” you marveled, eyes trained on it, and he almost groaned at it, because you sounded so genuinely amazed, so disbelieving. 

“Just put your hands around the parts you can’t reach. I’ll be gentle, baby, don’t worry,” he said. You nodded hesitantly, leaning forward towards it, but his hand in your hair suddenly clenched and pulled you back. You looked up at him and saw his eyes brimming with worry. “You do want this, right?” 

“Yes, please, stop being so- so gentle with me and let me suck your dick!” You whined, fed up with being treated like glass, and tugged his hand out of your hair. Seokmin visibly relaxed at your insistence, nodding. 

Finally, fingers grabbing the base of it, you wrapped your mouth around the tip. You were met immediately with the taste of his pre-cum, licking over where it leaked curiously. Seokmin’s hand found your hair again, gripping it tight to steady himself, as he groaned loudly. You slowly sank down, basking in the whimpers you ripped from his mouth.

“Fuck- you’re- you’re doing so good, baby,” he cried, face twisted in pleasure and head thrown back. You looked up at him and he was so pretty and glowing, panting into the air. 

You sank down as far as you could, feeling the tip sit snug against the back of your mouth, and your hands wrapped around the base of his dick. You looked up at him, experimentally squeezing, and pursing your lips around his dick to suck it carefully.

“A-ah! Fuck!” Seokmin cried, hand that wasn’t in your hair squeezing the edge of his mattress. His thighs were flexing on either side of your head. “You’re- you’re so good at this, sweetheart. Good girl, fuck, such a pretty girl for me, letting me use you like this.” 

You whined at his words, squeezing your thighs together. Seokmin’s hips bucked upwards at the vibrations, hitting the back of your throat. The sudden intrusion was unexpected and you let out a garbled moan around his cock. He panted regretfully: “S-Sorry, baby, d-didn’t mean to do that, you just feel so good. Can- can you bob your head up and down it for me?” 

You did, started moving your head up and down his shaft, and breathing hard through your nose, while your hands squeezed the base of his cock. Looking up at Seokmin, you felt confidence that you were doing something right. He was in heaven, face all scrunched up and breathing as if he’d just ran a marathon. 

And when he peeked his down to you, he could’ve cum immediately. Your pretty lips wrapped around his cock, head bopping with tears in your eyes from the pressure in your throat, and how curious and sparkling they were, gauging his reaction. The groan that clawed its way up from his heart, through his throat and out into his room quickly turned to a whimper. 

“I’m- I’m gonna cum, sweet pea, can I-” he swallowed hard, because even the thought had him close to release. “Can I cum down your throat, pretty?” 

You nodded, a little too preoccupied to answer, but Seokmin got it, and with just a couple more bobs, and the feeling of your wet tongue pressing against the underside of his cock, he spurted into your mouth in long ropes of white, whining at the top of his lungs, and pulling hair from the roots. 

It was, admittedly, a little gross and sticky in your mouth, but it was also hot and you felt proud you’d made him feel good. He was panting, trying to recover, when you pulled off his dick, a satisfied smile on your face. His hand wandered to your face, caressing your cheekbone, before moving down to your puffy lips. 

“Can I-” he was almost embarrassed, “Can I see baby? Can you open your mouth for me?” 

A little confused, you did as told and opened your mouth, sticking out your tongue that was still covered in his sticky release. 

“Fuck,” he groaned at the sight, squeezing his eyes shut and willing himself not to get hard again. “C-Can you swallow it for me, beautiful?” 

Still confused, you nodded and gulped it down, trying not to look like it felt as gross as it did. If Seokmin noticed, he didn’t remark it, because he only groaned again, and pulled you by your face into a sloppy, heated kiss. 

“So, so, so good for me,” he whispered, not letting you out of the kiss, even when saliva dripped down your chin. “Such a good girl, letting me use her mouth, such an obedient, good girl.” 

You whined into his mouth at those words, bothered by the aching in your core that his moans and his blissed out face had caused, and now those words repeated over and over: Good girl.

He grinned into your mouth. “Yeah? You like being my good girl, right? Like doing your best for Seokminnie?” 

“Yes,” you murmured breathlessly, too lost in the feeling of his mouth and his hands rubbing your waist to come up with anything better.

Seokmin pulled away with a warm smile, both hands coming up to cup your cheeks. “You did well,” was all he said, and you could genuinely cry, because that was it - you just wanted to know you did well. 

“I’m gonna go clean up, okay?” he said, waiting for you to nod in response before he pushed himself off the bed, snatching a new pair of boxers from a drawer on his way out of the door. 

You threw yourself on the bed, closing your eyes contentedly. 

He liked you. You were sure of it now, when you thought back to how his eyes had balked at you so wonderfully, how careful and attentive he’d been. You were certain, and your heart smiled and you smiled and your hair was sprawled out on his sheets and for the first time, that desert wasteland in your head welcomed you and took you in, and you were right where you were supposed to be. 

Until your phone started buzzing. 

It was dancing across the sheets violently at someone's call and you peeked open one eye tiredly to pick it up. And when you did, the desert turned on you. Caught in a sandstorm, you held your phone between your fingers and felt your heart drop, lowered into the acid bath of your stomach.

It was Vernon.

Vernon, who was Seokmin’s best friend. Vernon, who was your brother. Vernon, who had always yelled at you to leave his room whenever he had Seokmin over. Vernon, who didn’t like when you talked to any guys at all, who had recruited his best friend to watch over you and take care of you. Vernon, whose best friend had just had his dick in your mouth. 

You heard the shower running distantly when you clicked accept, hoping to God that you didn’t look too disheveled. 

“Hi, N/n!” Vernon cheered immediately on the other end. His face popped up on your screen, a bright smile on his face. You smiled too - you missed your brother - but it was half faded, and Vernon noticed immediately. 

“Hi, Vern,” you said softly. His brows furrowed. “What’s wrong?” 

Of course, he could read you like a book. Of course, he knew that you were distant and nervous. You sighed heavily, trying desperately to collect yourself, to remember how you usually behaved, but for some reason, that you was far gone, and you had to be splayed on his screen, like a person replaced by something peregrine. 

“I’m a little stressed out,” you mumbled. “Got a lot of papers and stuff, that’s why I’m not home.” 

“Come home next break, okay? We miss you and you need to get out of that place every once in a while.” 

You nodded. 

Vernon’s eyes narrowed suddenly, and you saw him lean closer to the screen (which would have been funny, were you not suddenly wondering if there was leftover cum on your face). “Hey, where are you right now?” 

“My friend,” you said quickly - too quickly. “Her name’s Yunjin, we’re working together in chem.” 

Vernon hummed, seemingly content with your answer. “Your friend has the same bed sheets as Seokmin.” 

Shit, yeah, they facetimed every week, you remembered, cringing at yourself for not thinking of it earlier. You tried to play it cool, shrugging: “Weird.”

“Yeah, anyway-” 

Vernon rambled on and on about something or other, but you were unable to focus, watching the door to Seokmin’s room with a worried frown.

Moreover, you felt like a whore. Realistically, you hadn’t even lost your virginity. But sleeping with your brother’s best friend suddenly felt way more real now that you were talking to said brother, now that you were lying to his face, and you felt dirty and gross and you wished you could stand before Vernon, as the same baby sister that you had been before. But you weren’t. You were disgusting.

“Vernon, I gotta go,” you cut him off, and you hadn’t heard a word. Vernon’s excited expression dropped and he furrowed his brows. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, and you thanked the pixels for concealing at least a bit of the worry on his face. 

“Yeah, I just- I really need to get going,” you said. “Bye, Vernon!”

“By-” 

You disconnected the call and gathered your things, put your own clothes back on. Throwing Seokmin’s clothes onto his floor felt like shedding a second skin - a skin that had made you ugly and greedy and lustful. You only kept his boxers on, lumping the dress over your shoulders to drape over you in an unsightly and unorganized way. 

You spared a glance at the wrapped condom on his bedside table, long lost and forgotten by now. You could leave it. You could leave it and have a reason to come back, a reason to slip across that ledge again and fall into his arms and his mouth and his warmth. You almost did. Almost left it right there, where it begged to belong. But you snatched it off the counter, ignoring the way your heart clenched when you did, and slipped it into your tote bag. And you left, jumping across the border that separated you and back into your own wasteland. And it was so cold and so empty. You were alone again.

Seokmin came out of the shower, expecting to see you cuddled up in his bed, all soft and beautiful. But you weren’t there. Seokmin understood immediately. The condom was gone and so were you, only the perfume in his sheets remained, willing him to remember. And he cried. He sobbed into his own hands, because what had he done? 

You did not see each other the rest of that day. Or the next day. _____________________________

Seokmin wanted to let you disappear. He wanted you to slip away and he wanted to forget it had even happened - like a burning star dies out and leaves only a faint warmth behind, lasting years. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t let you go, couldn’t bear knowing he’d never hold you in his arms again, never see you laugh again, never see you cum again. And he couldn’t bear knowing that maybe he’d read it wrong; maybe he’d made you uncomfortable, maybe you’d felt obligated. 

So he texted you. For two days his texts came in sporadically and unsuccessfully. Questioning and pleading, he wanted to know it wasn’t true. 

Lee Seokmin: why’d you leave? 

Lee Seokmin: can we talk??

Lee Seokmin: i miss u

Lee Seokmin: i need to know i didnt hurt you

Lee Seokmin: can you please answer? 

Each text came more painful than the last. Each text came more pleading. You sat alone in your room, in the dark, having only his one sided chats to light up your tear-streaked face. 

Eventually they stopped coming. You thought they would. You thought, you knew, eventually he’d give up. But what hurt the most was knowing he wanted you too; knowing he liked you as much as you liked him. You’d seen it in his eyes, when his hand slipped between your legs, and you’d seen it when he came staring down at you.

But you preferred to remember Seokmin for how he was.

How he was small and young, how he had a swanky bowlcut and how he looked in his school uniform. How he and your big brother, Vernon, had bonded and watched movies together in your living room, and the countless dinners he’d stayed over for, always so respectful to your parents and you. You preferred to remember when he didn’t love you back. 

The pain that had been tethered to your youth and to him, back when he was unreachable, just a figure you could marvel at, was so much duller compared to this pain, the one pulsed in your heart now: the pain of him loving you back, but still being off-limits. Something that could be, but was destined to die out. And it did, when he stopped texting you, you felt that unborn child’s soul leave your own. Alone again.

And then suddenly, you weren’t. 

A stern knock on your door. You flinched at the sound, fearing the worst. You were in your bed, in your sweatpants and your sweater and that condom was on the bedside table, watching the door with you. 

Another knock.

“Y/n, I know you’re in there!” 

Seokmin. Of course, it was Seokmin. No one else would come for you. But it was all too painful. You feared the worst - feared that seeing him, you would collapse into him again, and that this time you wouldn’t be able to find your way back. 

“Open the door, Y/n,” his voice was serious.

“Go away, Seokmin!” you yelled, voice breaking halfway. 

A pause. When Seokmin spoke again, he was not angry anymore; he was vulnerable.

“Y/n. I-I know you don’t want to talk to me, but-” he paused, wincing at himself and you knew there was tears in his eyes. “But I need to know that I didn’t make you uncomfortable.” 

You thought that you could handle the self-blame Seokmin omitted - maybe that’s just because it was words on a screen. But hearing him crying outside your door, and how real he was when his hand knocked vigorously, it tore down each and every one of your last defenses. 

“I need- I need to hear that you’re okay and that I-” 

“I’m opening the door,” you interrupted him, and sure enough you padded to the door and swiftly unlocked it. 

And then you were standing before one another. It was like time stopped, how the air stilled around you, and how the world quieted down. He was all crumpled paper hearts, all deflated and broken, and his hair was messy and his eyes were dark, but they sparkled again, just at the sight of you, and yours at him. 

“It’s not your fault,” you whispered, breaking the enchantment cast upon you. The real world came crashing down, the people in the streets and birds in the trees and wind coursing through the leaves. The light that you’d shut out with a firm tug to the curtains was dancing on your linoleum floor. “It’s my fault. It’s- I talked to Vernon and I- I feel like shit, Seokmin. I feel like a slut.” 

“You’re a virgin!” Seokmin scoffed, but it did nothing to calm you. 

“It felt wrong! Because I- because you’re Vernon’s friend. Because Vernon never likes when I date guys, and because now I’ve been fooling around with his best friend,” you defended yourself, biting your lip when tears stung your eyes. Seokmin softened. “I just felt guilty. And gross.” 

“You’re not gross, you’re in love,” he said softly, and your eyes locked. Everything about him was pleading - he was just short of literally falling to his knees, begging for you to hear him out. “And- and with me, of all people!” 

“Seokmin-” 

“And I’m in love with you too,” his voice was an urgent whisper, not daring to let you speak again, to let you try and steer him away. 

“Of all people,” you mumbled, a small smile finding your lips. Seokmin smiled too. 

“So.. I’m tired of hearing you talk about yourself like this. I’m tired of Vernon being the one keeping us apart. I want- I want you to know that Vernon would understand.”

You shook your head dismissively. He wouldn’t. 

“I know him too! You know? Maybe better than you,” he pouted a little, and it made you laugh, and everything was becoming lighter, and for better or worse you really did want to jump into his arms again. “He shouldn’t be the thing stopping you from dating me- or- or anyone, really. But especially me.” 

You giggled again, and Seokmin’s heart palpitated in his chest at that sound - and at being the source of it. Then the laughter trailed off and your smile tightened and your heart tightened: “I just don’t want to sneak around-” 

“Okay! Say no more!” Seokmin interrupted, hand held out as if to calm a mighty beast. He casually pulled out his phone, tongue in his cheek, as he called your brother. Vernon.

It rang for a few seconds, put on speaker. You couldn’t help the nervousness. Couldn’t help the pinch in your nerves, building up from your stomach and into your heart. Then he answered. 

“Hey, dude, what’s up?” Vernon’s voice glitched on the other end of the line, utterly oblivious (as always). Seokmin spoke, hand on his hip: “Hey, just curious, how would you feel if me and your sister started dating?” 

There was a moment of silence. On Vernon’s end, you imagined it was simply puzzled, but on your end, you stood with your heart all big and floaty, like a balloon in your hand, waiting for him to say that he’d hate it, that he’d kill him, and pop your heart with a simple word to prick. That wasn’t what he said though. Vernon said:

“I mean, yeah, man, I’d prefer you over any of those other college douchebags. I at least know you’d take care of her for real, man, not like that Jeonghan guy you were going on about.” 

Your heart balloon took off, and the boundary between you and Seokmin filled itself with sand. Had it been imaginary? This whole time? You couldn’t help the wheeze you left you, overwhelmed with relief and joy. 

“I know, man, Jeonghan’s the worst,” Seokmin said casually, but he was grinning from ear to ear at your reaction. You’d buckled over in silent laughter, unable to contain the glee. It seemed to dramatic now 

“The worst,” Vernon repeated. Then he pursed his lips and spoke again: “So you’re dating my sister?” 

“Uh, you know, I think we’re making it official in a second, yeah,” Seokmin said and even Vernon could hear the smile in his voice. 

“Cool, man, yeah, I kind of figured, she facetimed me with your ugly ass bed sheets in the background, and I thought, no way, a girl would buy those bed sheets.” 

“Lay off my sheets, man.” 

Both of the men laughed and you did too, crying laughing and covering your mouth to contain. Your chest was fluttering with butterflies and light and love.

“Hey, man, for real, if you hurt her, I know where you live, bro,” Vernon was suddenly serious. 

“I wouldn’t dream of it, man,” Seokmin responded, equally as serious now. He eyed you, then spoke into the phone again: “Hey, I gotta go make sweet love to your sister.” 

“Ew, dude, don’t say tha-” 

And the phone was hung up and Seokmin was laughing with you, eyes crescent and smile wide and toothy, and cheeks all red and shiny, he doubled over and took your hands in his. “I told you, didn’t I?” 

“Shut up, Lee,” you said, pulling him by the hand and letting him kiss you. Letting yourself kiss him. Letting yourself back into his arms, and this time Seokmin had crossed the border, and had fallen into you, and you stood there together and you were in love. 

So, so in love, your lips entangled and danced together, and your hands dragged up the back of his neck and his up your waist. 

And you realized, his tongue in your mouth, this was how you preferred to remember Seokmin; completely and utterly in love with you, and dancing with you in your room, and smiling into the kiss, and hands running up your body. You preferred to remember him as yours, and yourself as his. 

Seokmin guided you to your bed, pulling your body into his lap. Then he pulled away, completely out of breath, and smiling at you like a twinkling star. 

“Think we can finally break open that condom now?” 

“Fuck yes,” you said.

And then you did.

#dk x reader #svt dk x reader #lee dokyeom x reader #lee seokmin x reader #seokmin x reader #dk smut #seokmin smut #dokyeom smut #lee seokmin smut #lee dokyeom smut #svt smut #svt x reader #seventeen smut #seventeen x reader #svt angst #seventeen angst

[webslingingslasher]

ok but what if some girl would be saying that she slept with frat!peter after some party (where he was with trouble) and stuff like "oh yeah he had me calling him daddy and he's totally not a boob guy" and trouble overhears her and goes to peter with "you would not believe what i have just heard" and joking that maybe she has magic tits or something

you weren't listening.

minding your own business, pouring liquor into plastic cups, and cracking a can of sprite for a mixer; a group of friends crowded behind you. not listening, but certain words poked out more than others.

"he's fucking jacked by the way, it's like when i hooked up with parker."

your blood ran cold, frozen in place you were straining your hearing for each word to follow, if she didn't add more context you'd be shaking peter by his shirt.

a friend gasps, "you did? when?"

oh, not old news?

yeah, when did she?

flashing your eyes to peter, he's talking to someone and not paying attention. you'll kill him.

"like, around the start of the school year?"

oh thank god, he's in the clear.

"okay, well... spill!"

you can't walk away, your feet are glued to the vinyl floor. maybe, you just want to know if peter's telling the truth when he says you're different than the rest.

"ass man all the way, insisted on doggy. big dick, strong game, threw me around a little, had me calling him daddy and everything. not very affectionate though, i don't think he kissed me, actually. and not a lick of a cuddle after, threw my dress at me and said 'need an uber?' but, hey, i'd still do it again."

another friend cackles, "too bad, nate begged him to do a double date and parker immediately shut it down and said, and i quote, 'no. i have a girlfriend. she doesn't want me dating other girls.' kinda sweet if you ask me."

your heart soars, this is the first time he's ever referred to you as his girlfriend. not that you were, at least not officially, but it's easier to explain than what you actually were, and you had no idea what you were. you assume he doesn't either.

their conversation falls into something else, making you feel confident in moving away from the counter with a full cup in each hand, walking straight to the most interesting man of the night.

peter perking up instantly, leaving his friend with a fist bump, meeting you halfway.

"hi trouble, i missed you." a warm kiss placed on your cheek, you can't help the grin while handing him his drink, "hi handsome, i got a question..." you trail your words off and shift your back against his chest so he'd have a clear view of who you're pointing at.

"see that group of friends, do you know anyone there?"

he barely gives them a look over, one harm slung over your waist, he presses a kiss to your shoulder, "no, don't think so."

nudging him, "no, really. look." a sigh, "looking, no one looks familiar." the back of your head hits his chest, "peter, c'mon. please don't tell me you're one of those guys."

"i don't know what you mean! are you testing me or something?"

turning in his hold, a small pout hangs. "you hooked up with one of them. tell me which one and you earn two brownie points."

that changes things, because now peter knows what the mission is and how to identify previous suitors. mind ticking and eyes running over each body in a different way. watching him analyze is interesting. You wonder what he looks for in a hookup.

"the one in the middle. i'm sure of it, but i can't remember her name. I think it started with an 's' or 'v' maybe 'l'?"

"It's whitney," peter cheers his cup on your shoulder, "oh yeah, that's right."

you spin in his grasp, "liar. i made that up." peter pulls you closer, "you're just so convincing, trouble. call me gullible."

humming, you press a kiss to his chin, "she was talking about you, wanna hear?"

"this feels like a trap, i don't like this idea."

"oh, you should. i heard all about you in bed, and how you told nate i was your girlfriend." peter shakes his head, "i think you've been hitting the sauce hard tonight and you're making things up."

shaking your head like a toddler, "nope, i heard the truth about daddy." peter's head is thrown back with a groan, "alright, wow, we're really doing this. what else did you hear?"

"that you're an ass man, and," you sway on your feet and pretend to twirl a stand of hair, a nasally sarcastic tone rips, "you're like so, super fucking jacked. like, seriously so sexy. ugh! with a big dick too!"

peter presses a kiss to your cheek, "thank you for the compliments, baby." another kiss, the corner of your mouth, "even if you're sarcastic." a delicate kiss to your lips, "and a little wrong."

"which part was wrong? she's right, you've got a fucking wrench."

your cup is pulled from your hand, "alright, it's done. we're done."

a whine, "no! c'mon, please, daddy?"

"i'll silence you and you won't like it."

"will it be with your monster coc-"

a hand is slapped over your mouth, "i'll kill you, and won't have a problem with it."

#peter parker x reader #peter parker blurb #tasm!peter x reader #frat!peter drabbles #my writing

[girlokwhatever]

✩ ₊˚.🎧⋆☾⋆✧₊ ⊹ nice surprise,, pt.2

paige bueckers x fem!reader

that night after the live had to be one of the best nights of your life.

she wasn’t lying about coming over, less than twenty minutes had passed before she was knocking on your door. you quickly opened it, shocked she was there but even more shocked by the fact that this was all real.

“hey, it’s nice to meet you.” she smiled down at you so sweetly, tucking her loose hair behind her ear and leaning against your doorway. you noticed she changed out of her pajamas, opting for grey sweatpants instead and a different sweater.

“it’s nice to meet you too, you can um- you can come in.. let me just-“ you’re kicking your roommate’s shoes against the wall so she doesn’t trip on them, slightly distressed because is the dorm always this messy?

once you’re done you let her in, closing the door gently behind her. she’s immediately hit with a scent so different from what she’s used to, but she really likes it. she looks at you and decides that it matches your energy. that’s another thing; being in your space, your home, makes her feel like she knows you on some personal level. like in a way she’s meant to be here.

“m’sorry if it’s messy, sunday’s are cleaning days i swear.”

“no it’s alright, it’s nice. really cozy. i like it.”

deep down you’re sighing in relief, but deep down you’re also deathly nervous. you’ve never met someone like this, what do you even do?

“can i get a water?”

she sees your eyes shoot wide, scurrying into the kitchen in search of a water bottle. you can’t see her but she’s got a stupidly smug grin on her face, amused by how jittery you are. she wants to reach out and grab your hand, maybe pull you closer to her, but she remembers she only met you a few hours ago.

“here y’go!” you’re smiling with pride, pushing the glass of water (topped with ice) in her direction. she thinks you’re the most beautiful person she’s ever got the pleasure of looking at before, completely aware of the effect you have on her. you on the other hand, are completely oblivious.

all of the sudden, paige has the thought that she doesn’t really care how long she’s known you for. what does matter is that she knows she wants to hold you, at least be a little closer. so she’s wrapping her fingers around yours and tugging you towards her.

butterflies aren’t just fluttering in your stomach, you think they’re eating you alive. her hand is warm and isn’t far away from engulfing yours, but you like this intimacy. it’s soft and sweet and pure, both just enjoying the new company.

“wanna take you out somewhere, is that ok?” her hands barely found their way under your sweater, thumbs circling your bare hips. her eye contact is persistent but she’s really just looking for any hesitation from you; she doesn’t want you to be uncomfortable at all.

you’re glancing back at the clock: 11:33 p.m. you decide in that moment you’d let her take you anywhere, whenever she wanted. she’s got you wrapped around her finger, completely at her mercy. somehow knowing this doesn’t bother you, not even a little bit.

“yeah, s’okay.” your tone lets her know it’s more than okay, but that’s an unspoken understanding between the two of you.

paige is looking at you, the reality of your outfit setting in. she feels a tinge of jealousy course through her at the thought of you being a caitlin clark fan, wearing iowa’s team logo instead of hers.

“gotta take this off though, it’d ruin my reputation.” she’s got a hold on the sweater, tugging on it as you walk towards what she assumes is your room.

she was right, walking into your space. bed messily made, soft lights adorning your bedside table, an unorganized desk.. she thinks it’s fitting for you. just from what she’s experienced from you so far, she feels like she’s got a good read on you.

“i thought iowa was cool” you’re using air quotes and throwing her words back at her. you’re funny, you really are, already knowing how to push her buttons.

“yeah? but nothing beats uconn.”

you’re laughing and, was that a snort? she’s not entirely sure, but it doesn’t really matter when you’re head is thrown back and you’re looking at her like that. she jokingly takes offense, helping you lift the sweater away from your body and throwing it into some deep crevice of your room. paige is aware of the fact that she has to turn away from you, cause if she doesn’t, she’s more than positive she’ll get on her knees in front of you and beg for anything you’ll give to her.

“is this our first date?”

“i’d like to think so.”

once you’ve changed into something you both agreed to (that doesn’t have anything to do with iowa), she’s urging you out the door and to her car. as she starts to drive, she decides to take this time just to talk. she wants to at least know your favorite color considering she’s already seen you in your bra. from your instagram she knows you’re a grade under her, studying in your junior year.

you both end up finding out things about each other you didn’t know before. simple, basic things, but things nonetheless.

you have more in common than you thought. you both have little brothers, from the same hometown, you like some of the same music, you both like sports and the spring time, the little things. the way she describes her younger brother reminds you of your own, and for a second you hope they can meet each other. that hopefully this could go somewhere serious. maybe it’ll really mean something.

“ok, before you say anything, this is my favorite café and i know it’s late but they’re open all night. i can buy you a coffee or something-“

she’s nervous, she’s never taken a date here. she’s never really taken a girl anywhere in awhile. she’s glad it’s you though and not someone else.

“it’s really cute! i really like it paige.” your hand finds itself on her bicep, squeezing slightly. she feels more confident under your touch, like it recharges her. when you pull away to leave the car, she finds herself wanting to chase your touch, desperate to feel it again.

she gives into the feeling, grabbing your hand as the two of you walk inside. she scolds herself for moving too fast and clinging too much, but you’re holding her hand tight to keep her there. you don’t know why you’re so drawn to her, but you are. definitely. everything feels so natural with her, like you don’t have to try hard to impress her.

you both order and despite your protest, she pays for your drink and slice of cake. she’s insisting that you’re gonna share with her anyway so it doesn’t matter.

“so.. that was your roommate on the live with you earlier?”

“yeah, her name is evie. we’ve roomed together since freshman year. why?”

“jus askin. figured i should write her a ‘thank you’ card for being the reason we met.”

you think that’s a remark you’d usually laugh at, but when paige says it, it sounds so genuine. the only response you can muster is a smile. you’re also irrevocably thankful for evie and her spontaneity because you know without it you would still be in your dorm, either sleeping or watching some stupid movie.

“don’t say stuff like that paige”

“why not?”

before you’re forced to answer her and possibly embarrass yourself, a waiter is brining your drinks and cake. you take a bite and make a comment about how good it is and ‘paige you should try it’ to change the topic. it doesn’t work on her though, she’s still questioning you. all you do is shake your head, nervously sipping your coffee and avoiding it.

“why can’t i say that?”

“because you’re too sweet. if you say stuff like that i’m absolutely one hundred percent positive i’ll fall in love with you.”

“would that be so bad?”

“you tell me.”

looking back on it, paige doesn’t think she could’ve pulled you in any faster. she’s kissing you with desperation, seeking your warmth in the cold winter air. her hands cup your face gently, holding you like her life depends on it. you kiss her back, giving into your feelings despite all the apprehension. your mouth move together in sync, finding your own unique rhythm to follow. after you falter for a second she pulls away, fearing that maybe you didn’t want that.

you look at her for a second and catch your breath. it’s your turn to cup her face this time, her hands traveling down to your hips. you pull her back in for a gentle and sweet lasting kiss, savoring the way her lips move against yours and the way she tastes.

she’s pulling away again, moving you to her car and really looking at you.

“that was a nice surprise,”

“paige?”

“yeah?” she’s holding your hand to her face, leaning into you.

“this isn’t the last date right?”

“i’m never leaving you alone after tonight ma, take that as you will.”

₊˚ʚ ᗢ₊˚✧ ﾟ.ִ ࣪𖤐˚. ✦.˳·˖✶ ⋆.✧̣̇˚.

guys i might redo this tomorrow idk how i feel

be honest!! is it bad or mid or fire 🤑

really though be honest kk thanks!!!!!

#paige buckets #paige bueckers #uconn wbb #paige bueckers smut #paige bueckers x reader #uconn huskies #uconn women’s basketball

[shangchiswife]

joel miller- pretty pink skirt

summary: joel miller gets possessive over you so you teach him a lesson

joel x fem!reader

warnings: smut, cursing

word count: 3226

....

The moment you strutted down the street in that pretty pink skirt Joel Miller knew it was the end of him.

He watched the way that with every step the skirt showed a sliver of your thighs and fit snugly against your curves.

His breath caught in his throat at the way the hint of a smirk formed on your lips as you smoothed your fingers over the flowy skirt.

You knew exactly what you were doing and it was definitely on purpose.

….

The previous day you had been at the local Jackson bar when a man around your age approached you.

He was handsome with steel gray eyes hidden behind dark frames and unruly curly hair.

Joel had been sipping a glass of beer as he watched the man approach you.

The man tapped your shoulder before you turned your head to spin in his direction.

Your jaw dropped as you hopped off the stool you previously sat on to stare at the man in front of you.

“Ollie?” you questioned as the man grinned.

You ran into his arms, wrapping your arms around his neck while he embraced you back with an equal amount of passion.

His thick eyebrows furrowed together as he downed the rest of his beer, his fingers pressing hard against his glass as he watched the interaction.

“It’s been so long oh my god! How are you?” you asked excitedly as you broke away from him and watched as he gave you an excited look.

“As good as I can be in an apocalypse,” he said as you threw your head back in laughter.

“Oh, Ollie you’re just like I remembered,” you shook your head as you remembered the two of you rolling around in the dirt together at recess time at the small local school in the QZ.

“I hope not I’ve grown at least a foot since you last saw me!” Oliver feigned mock pain as he placed a hand over his hand.

You rolled your eyes and shoved his hand away from his chest.

“So how’s your love life?” you asked wiggling your eyebrows suggestively which didn’t go unnoticed by Joel who narrowed his eyebrows at you.

“Man you know I keep looking but I’ll never find the right guy,” he scratched the back of his head awkwardly as you took his hand in yours and squeezed it tightly.

“One day you’ll find him I promise,” you said as he offered you a shy smile and hugged you.

“So do you have anyone?” he raised his eyebrows, trying to mock you.

“Yeah actually-”

You were cut off by Joel whose glare cut you so deep you stumbled into Ollie’s arms.

“You ok?” Ollie questioned.

“She’s fine,” Joel’s voice dripped with malice before he grabbed your arm.

“C’mon we’re going home, Y/N,” the older man grabbed your forearm as you turned your head and waved at your former best friend who made kissing faces.

You exited the bar and entered the breezy streets of Jackson.

The night sky was glittering with white stars and a bright full moon.

“Joel, I was in the middle of talking!” you said.

“Talking or flirting,” Joel gritted his teeth as you stopped in your tracks, gawking at your boyfriend.

“Ollie is a childhood friend-”

“I don’t care who he is he is not allowed to look at you like that,” the salt and pepper-haired man twisted his head around to shoot his eyes at you.

You started to laugh a little.

You could practically feel the red-hot jealousy radiating off him.

Joel’s face burned with anger.

“Texas I don’t think you understand,” you giggled using your favorite nickname on him, placing a hand on his arm to stabilize yourself.

“Oh, I think I’m starting to…” his thick southern accent slipped into his words as he shoved his arm away from you.

Suddenly you weren’t smiling anymore.

“Joel you’re still not getting it he isn’t into w-”

“You know what save it,” he cut you off with a hand before turning around, his broad back facing you.

“Have fun with your ‘childhood best friend,’” he said using air quotes when he said childhood best friend.

How did he not believe you?

You felt hot tears blur your vision.

“He’s into fucking men, Joel!” you shouted as he whipped his head around, eyes wide.

He opened his mouth to say something but you used his method by cutting him off with a hand.

“YOU save it, Joel I can’t believe you didn’t trust me or my love for you for one second after all we’ve been through together,” your lip trembled with your words as Joel put his head down in shame.

“I’m not coming back to your place tonight so don’t even bother waiting for me,” your voice cracked as you turned back to the direction of the bar, swiping stray tears away from your face.

Joel felt his heart crack into a million pieces as he watched you walk away from him, the dim yellow streetlamps illuminating your form.

….

The first time you both had slept together was years ago after Sam and Henry had passed.

It had been hours since you’d buried them and Joel was now driving you and Ellie away.

Ellie had fallen asleep long ago, her soft snores providing you with little comfort.

Your entire body had been shaking with terror as the scenes of Sam and Henry dying replayed in your head.

You tried to look around to distract yourself from the two with the once former blooming suburbs of the small town you were in.

“Hey,” Joel’s voice was soft as he put a hand on your bouncing knee, stopping it instantly.

Your heart dropped as he stared at you, his brown eyes full of concern.

“You alright? You haven’t slept,” he said as he slowed the truck.

You shook your head lightly, avoiding eye contact with him as he stopped the car in front of a house.

“Come on let’s stop for the day,” he said as you said nothing, your face a mask void of emotion.

He opened the passenger side for you to get out of and then lifted Ellie out of the car as she stirred, making an annoyed grunt.

“I know I know, you’ll get back to bed soon enough,” he said as she opened her eyes and took your hand in hers.

The house was deserted without a single sign of life except for pictures of a family of five that lined the living room.

“Let’s get to bed, sweetheart,” you coaxed Ellie, leading her up the rickety steps to the second floor.

The girl grumbled as you guided her into a room that was previously home to a teenage girl.

Ellie stared at the lush made-up king-sized bed and immediately jumped into it, covering herself with the thick bright blanket.

A moment later, her snores returned and you snorted before going over to her and pressing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

“Hey,” Joel rapped his knuckles on the doorframe as you spun around to face him.

How did he always look so dashing?

“You should get some rest,” he said as you walked over to him and let him lead you to a bedroom, his hand resting on the small of your back.

Your heart pounded from his touch as he escorted you into a large bedroom.

The sheets were velvet while the pillows had satin over them.

“These were some rich people,” you mumbled to yourself as your fingers brushed over the thick blanket.

The older man nodded as you slipped under the covers.

Your eyes were still wide open.

“What’s wrong?” Joel asked knowingly as he crouched beside you.

At this point, you both had known each other for months and Joel being as observant as he was always noticed when something was off with you. Maybe it was the feelings he was fighting for you that made him more attentive when it came to you.

“Can’t stop thinking about them,” you shuddered as you thought about Sam and the way his head had jerked violently when he was shot.

The sweet innocent boy that you had grown attached to within the span of a day.

Joel was not used to being open but when it came to you he would do whatever you wanted.

“Do you wanna talk about it?” he questioned, raising his thick eyebrows slightly looking for a reaction.

“No, I just want to sleep now you’re right I am tired,” you said, pressing your tired face against the silky soft pillow.

“Alright then,” the man bowed his head and made his way toward the door.

“Wait!” you said making him stop in his tracks.

“Can you…stay with me?” you asked sheepishly as the Texan’s heart stopped at your invitation.

“Of course,” he breathed as he made his way next to you and went under the blanket.

“Thanks, Miller,” you said, giving him a shy smile before drifting off to sleep.

That was the day when Joel Miller knew he had fallen in love.

….

Now he watched you strut down the streets of Jackson without a care in the world while everyone stared at you with admiration and envy.

Men your age and Joel’s all took turns looking you up and down with wolfish grins on their faces.

“Lookin’ good baby,” he heard someone wolf whistle as you smiled innocently at the man, sending him a cheeky wink.

It was a particularly windy day and Joel watched as you tried to tame the skirt that tried to fly up and expose you.

Joel felt his fists clench in his jeans pockets as he watched you sashay down the most public avenue.

His veins practically popped out of his neck at the lustful looks of the men in Jackson who tried to take a peek at what was his.

Once you had passed the older man you shot him a nasty glare.

“That’s it,” he grumbled as he grabbed your wrist and pulled you into an abandoned alley.

You said nothing, your eyes narrowing as he stared you down, his once soft brown eyes cold.

“Miller,” your tone was even and matched his stern gaze.

“Look Y/N I’m sorry for being possessive over you I was just jealous,” he said as you said nothing.

“I can’t believe you’d ever accuse me of ever betraying your trust like that Joel that’s so fucked up,” you looked down at the ground, kicking a pebble.

Joel brought his fingers to your chin, lifting it up so that you locked eyes.

“Let me make it up to you then,” his voice was deep and sent shivers down your spine.

“It better be good because otherwise, I won’t be forgiving you, Texas,” you said, turning your head the other way and shifting your stance.

It was a good sign that you were using his signature nickname which made him regain his confidence.

The air was thick and electrifying with tension, passion, and desire as you both stared at each other intensely.

Joel angled his head down so that you felt his breath fan across your ear.

“You bet it’ll be good darlin',” he smirked as he watched you shudder from your close proximity.

The older man then got on his knees in front of you.

The sight was almost enough to make you drool but you controlled yourself because you were still slightly annoyed at him.

“You’re gonna have to be quiet if you want this sweetheart,” Joel said, gripping your thighs as he watched you nod in an uninterested manner, your blank face masking your want for him. 

Joel was going to make it his ultimate goal to coax that reaction out of you.

He rubbed your thighs sensually, his rough calloused hands smoothing them up and down at first before gently lifting up your pink skirt.

You knew that it’d drive him crazy when he’d see you wear it which was the reason you picked it out for this occasion.

“Such a pretty fuckin’ skirt,” he complimented before tearing his eyes away from the fabric and onto your pink lacy panties.

“Holy fuck,” he said, feeling his pants grow tighter as he pulled them down.

You held back a whimper at the feeling of the wind grazing over your bare pussy.

The Texan took one finger and dipped it in your folds, collecting your wetness.

“So fuckin’ wet,” he smirked before taking his wet finger and sucking it in his mouth.

Your pussy clenched around nothing as you watched the dirty action.

“Hurry the fuck up already,” you said impatiently as the man said nothing and plunged one of his fingers inside of you making you throw your head back against the brick wall behind you.

The combined feeling of him rubbing your clit at a tantalizingly slow pace and his middle finger continuously hitting your G-spot made your breaths shallow.

Joel grinned as he watched your face struggle to be neutral.

“Another finger outta do it,” he said, southern accent strong in his words before he added another finger into your weeping pussy making you mewl.

His eyes were trained on you as they took in every movement and reaction from you.

You grabbed a fistful of his salt and peppered hair and brought it close to your core as he took that as his cue and started to simultaneously flick your clit with his tongue and finger-fuck you.

“Joel,” you whimpered with pleasure as he groaned into your heat, swirling his tongue around at a brutal pace that made your eyes roll to the back of your head as he started to bring you to your climax.

You watched as his hands started to drip with your slick.

“So fuckin’ sweet,” he growled as he assaulted your pussy faster with his tongue sliding up and down your slit and his two fingers hitting your G-spot.

You were so close, the all-so-familiar coil in your stomach about to snap before Joel removed his head and fingers from you making you whine.

“Aww, I thought you were mad at me, sweetpea?” he mocked you.

“Fuck you, Miller,” you breathed out as he stood up and pushed you against the brick wall, one hand on the base of your throat shooting electricity down your spine.

“Oh I will, trust me, baby,” he said darkly, his pupils blown out and full of lust.

His tone made your heart drop to the lowest pit of your stomach and a pool of wetness form around your core.

You watched as the bulge in between his thighs grew from a whimper that escaped your throat.

You couldn’t help but get turned on by the situation as he slipped your shirt off, and threw it on the floor. 

He then undid your bra and immediately attacked your boobs with his hands. He squeezed the mound roughly and tweaked your pebbled nipples making you moan loudly.

Then you pulled him by his shirt to you and kissed him hard.

He kissed you back with an equal amount of passion as you ground your bare pussy on his clothed cock making him groan.

“Fuck baby you’re gonna make me cum right now,” he sighed with bliss as you removed your lips from his and attached them to his neck, licking and sucking everywhere.

He smirked at your movements before he unbuttoned his jeans, letting his girthy cock spring free.

He was leaking with pre-cum before he spun you around so that you were pressed against the cold wall, making you shiver.

You clenched your thighs together as you peeked at his dick.

“Like what you see baby?” he drawled tauntingly as he pumped himself a couple of times before peppering kisses on your neck and bunching up your skirt so that he had easier access to you.

“Always do,” you said, your core throbbing as he seized your hips in a bruisingly-tight grip and let his cock nudge against your slick entrance.

The older man pushed inside of you as you took one of his hands and intertwined it with one of yours as you allowed yourself to get used to his large length.

“So tight,” he hissed as he drove himself deeper into your cunt making you gasp with pleasure.

He stretched you out completely as your fingers clung to the brick wall in front of you.

“Ready?” he rasped as you nodded eagerly as he began to slip in and out of you at a rough pace, the way Joel liked it.

You were clouded with pleasure and bliss as he filled you up and left you empty within seconds.

You moaned loudly before Joel covered your mouth with one of his large hands.

“Careful sweetheart, don’t want anyone to hear you do you?” he panted as you whimpered into his hand.

His hand slapped your ass making you squirm underneath him.

“Such a dirty fuckin’ whore walking around town with a tiny skirt beggin’ for attention,” his pace turned even rougher as your vision blurred with tears from the stimulation.

“But we all know you just wanted my cock in the end isn’t that right?” he grinned cheekily.

“Yes,” you sighed.

“Yes what?” he growled gripping your throat as his other hand slid down your body to rub hard circles onto your clit.

“Yes, sir,” you managed as stars blinded you from the way he split you open with his cock.

“Good girl,” he massaged your ass before he continued to move into you, his thrusts started to get sloppy. 

The only other noises in the room were Joel’s grunts and the lewd noises that came out of your throat.

Your walls started to flutter around his length.

“Gonna cum,” you moaned louder as pressure started to build up in your lower belly.

“Me too,” he admitted, his nose brushing against your throat as he continued to pound into you, his balls hitting your ass while you clenched around him.

“Fuck!” you screamed into his hand before whimpering his name repetitively.

He gave you one last thrust before you both orgasmed at the same time with his seed filling you up and leaking down your thighs.

Waves of pleasure washed over your entire body as you shut your eyes with bliss as your orgasm came over you.

“So fuckin’ pretty,” he panted before he pulled out of you and twisted your tired body around so that you faced him.

He took your tossed clothes and gave them to you like the gentleman that he was.

You slid on your shirt while he returned your soiled panties to you.

Once you were fully clothed, the older man pulled you into his chest, placing a gentle hand on your head.

“Sweetheart I’m so sorry,” he said, his voice dripping with sadness.

“It’s okay, Joel, I know you were only doing all of that because you love me,” you gave him a smile before cupping his face.

He immediately melted into your touch before he pressed a kiss onto your hand, his eyes soft and adoring as he gazed at you like you were the most beautiful person in the world.

“I love you so much, cowboy,” you teased him before planting a kiss on his cheek.

“I love you too, sweetpea,”

#joel miller x reader smut #joel miller x reader #joel miller imagine #the last of us x reader #the last of us smut #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal smut

[shieldofiron]

Steve who’s convinced that Billy is straight. I mean convinced. He was the only lunatic in the world who would start liking a girl more after she waved a gun in his face… And it turned out that after Billy apologized to Lucas, Steve was next on the list. And he was having some kinds of feelings about it.

Goes through all seven levels of hell because he’s had guy crushes before sure, but it’s never been like this. Not when Billy’s apologizing in the parking lot, spitting fire with a black eye that Steve doesn’t remember putting there. Not when Steve finally stutters out the explanation he came up with Hopper when they all got back, and Billy had cracked, patting a hand on Steve’s shoulder. That shoulder felt warm for the rest of the day.

And then he saw Billy leaning over Aimee Parkinson and his whole body turned to ice for a second. It was probably just a break up thing. Like his feelings were just acting up. After all Steve still likes girls. Still got interested… but then sometimes he would think about that warm shoulder, about hands that never had scrapes on them. Billy just had really nice hands, ok?

He was able to ride that explanation for another few months, hands shaking when they made contact in gym or when he handed him a beer those infrequent nights when he’d go on a drive and find Billy’s car out by the quarry. Just getting over Nancy still, the feelings spilling over. And sometimes guys get man crushes when they want to be friends. Right?

It’s only that day at Starcourt when he sees Billy drive his car into Mrs Wheeler’s station wagon to try to stop her from hitting Nancy that it hits him. This shit isn’t going away. Not that there’s much time to think of it. Between the fireworks and Steve’s throbbing head there was Billy. Billy hustling El away when Mrs Wheeler dragged her to the monster and promptly melted into it, absorbed. Billy, who was the first person to hug Mike Wheeler after, telling him it was going to be ok, that his mom loved him, Billy knew she did.

Between late nights at the hospital, and waking up to one of those nice hands laid over his. They were friends. And it was a level of hell as of yet unimagined.

Friends, as it turned out, got jobs together. Fucking Keith loved Billy. Thought he was a laugh riot because Billy could quote some stupid British movie from memory. Because Billy was a nerd, underneath all the swagger and the unbuttoned shirts. And even that made Steve’s knees weak.

Eventually Robin clues him in. Gives him a word. Turns out liking guys and girls and basically whoever he likes is not the singular suffering of one Steven Alessandro Harrington. And it’s nice to have the word for it, even if he can’t do jack about it.

And then one night they’re shooting the shit after a late shift. Billy’s got his shirt off and his family video vest on, because he’s a demon from the fifth dimension. And Steve’s got extra cologne on because they’re hanging out. And they’re talking about how El wants her powers back and… Billy starts crying.

He starts babbling about Mrs Wheeler, how it’s Billy’s fault, all of it. Because she was driving out on that road to meet him.

Steve turns to ice again. Because he knew Billy was straight but… this…

But Billy keeps crying. Talking about his dad, how his dad always wants him to be a man. That he had to lie he had a date tonight just to be here. And how Billy thought if a rumor started with the moms in town it would finally get back to his dad, and his dad would believe it and lay off him. Believe that Billy is straight.

Steve lays a hand on Billy’s shoulder. And it burns, burns like hell. What did Billy always say. Looks like there’s some fire in him after all?

“What if you weren’t lying to your dad?”

Sniffles. Wiping tears away from blue eyes with his own hands.

“Whad’ya mean, Harrington.”

“This could be a date.”

Billy doesn’t move away. Those hands curl into Steve’s vest collar as their lips meet. Billy makes a noise, a sweet heavenly noise.

“You can call me Stephanie,” Steve whispers when they finally pull apart for a second. “If that makes you feel better.”

Billy snorts. “I could never want a girl like this. Sorry, I’ve only had my eye on one guy in town. Maybe you’ve heard of King Steve?”

Steve runs his hands up Billy’s shoulders, tangles in his hair, slotting their knees together. Billy can be very convincing.

#harringrove #billy hargrove #steve harrington #billy x steve #shieldofiron #my writing #heaven and hell #tw Karen wheeler mention

[0daylighthours0]

My Mother's Unbiased Byler + Milkvan Opinions - Viewing ST for the 1st Time!

(UPDATE)

My Mama has now witnessed Stranger Things in its entirety. Her favourite season was the third, her favourite characters Hopper and Joyce, her favourite pairing would be those guys too, and her most disliked pairing? Can only assume.

I wanted to write out her thoughts on the second to last episode previously, as she'd held many, but before I knew it we'd finished the whole show and I was forced to an income of NEW opinions which ruled out my memory of any old ones. Shucks. But boy did this lady have much to say. The only way I can break it down is by providing a sample of quotes she'd delivered, in order, a day after having finished the series.

All are just things she said about milkvan and byler, as they're this post's main focus. There's simply much to say about these relationships too, being so up in the air over where they ought be expected to turn out. These are all direct quotes too (as I typed as she talked, unkown to her) so you'll have to excuse the natural way in which some lines come off as unfocused, being written after real time conversations. Let's get into it:

Ok I really don't know whether she likes Mike very much. She actively disliked the guy earlier on, and now her feelings appear to be more mixed. A lot of her discussion was solely around this guy's actions.

"It's almost like he's [Mike] forcing himself like- ok Hopper he was kind of very passionate and kissing, you know he sort of instantly- with Mike, from being obsessed and spending so much time with her [El], suddenly he starts cooling off more and more and suddenly- they even separated right? I mean yeah that was out of his control but he, but he didn't really seem like he missed her you know it's like he just got on with it."

This point caught me off guard. I don't know how much I agree with my mother on this. It made me realize that during Mike and El's separation, there weren't many quiet Mike moments in which he expressed worry for her, beyond a couple that blend into him simply having breakup concerns. Any time Mike mentions distress for her whilst she's away, his talk evolves into him simply anxious over the state of their relationship. As a group, everyone in our Cali gang clearly wanted to save Eleven, but Mike really should have gotten more heartfelt moments in solitude (that means without Will you suffer bros) in which it is demonstrated to the audience that he really does miss her, as someone who is in love. Her being away shouldn't simply come off as a writing excuse for him to vent to Will. There wasn't enough of that tenderness milkvan desperately needs, and if anything I watched was an attempt then it really wasn't translated well - never trumping everyone else's familial or close frienship-like fret for El, never showcasing his concern to come from a more personal place. I mean how hard is it to have him in her room, staring longingly at a photo of hers, with a background composed of soft music. Then literally leaving it at that. I mean that is it. No Will rushing in there to insist, "you can tell her that thing when you see her k? It'll all work out trust me ight, you're the heart you're the HEART!" que affectionate gazes, constructs a byler scene for no reason I guess .

"I mean how do we know that he missed Will? He articulated it. Why didn't he articulate this the same way to El?"

True. I mean the fact that I can't remember a moment after they find El in which milkvan ask oneanother how they are, and communicate how much they missed eachother, does indeed say something. They shared a hug and touch when they first reunited, which was gladly interrupted by Will. That pineapple + pizza thing was not long enough, or sensitive enough, to be their moment. There was clear bonding, but it didn't breach a level of romance and chemistry nearly decently. It's good that they got at least that, I mean we need to know that these guys are at LEAST really close friends. And then the camera just felt like panning over to Will about to burst into tears in a corner. Like huh? Bruv you've now made it so that milkvan's pizza bit leaves a bad taste in our mouths. If I were a milkvan I'd be furious.

"You know what, I think it's done purposefully to create that sort of cold, distant, confused, you know they wanted to make people say he's [Mike] bisexual. For people to question. They want to get people to think that."

My Mama believes writers intentionally soured milkvan for viewers to "confuse" audiences, build up anticipation, make them question milkvan's relationship and wonder if our main man will spin to Will. I agree. They want that good ol' triangle comeuppance.

"They really are trying to bring that across- so that people start thinking Mike, you know he doesn't love El, he loves Will. They're really trying to, make people think that. Giving them [milkvan] a really nitty gritty relationship."

Yup.

"When you're gay. Coming out like that it's- it's terrifying. You have to be very careful. And Will could, he could tell. You know when someone is attracted to you. I think, things became sort of- sort of complicated. And Will sensed, he could feel that Mike is attracted to him. And that's why he could open up like that. Because you can always tell. You know, you just know, so that's why Will was able to confess these things to him [she sees painting scene as a confession, whether Mike realized it or not, and so do I]."

Well damn Mama. And there you have it folks. My.. I'm not gonna call her the h word but.. my- notabigfanofgaythingsandwouldbehappytopretendtheydon'texist mother, perceives Mike as a homosexual kid, and just that. Well bloomin heck that's all the confirmation I need.

I didn't expect this as a turnout, I mean so particularly. My Mama actually didn't like byler - I think. Well. Bloomin heck. She actually enjoyed Vickie x Robin, and this shocked me to my core. I don't know whether this is simply due to her being a fan of Vickie's actress (recognizing her from Anne With an 'E'), but I do know that my mother has a bias in gay relationships and sees ones involving females as more "pure" than that of two males. So her language when describing Will has changed since her realization that he loves Mike for sure (which became undeniable in the van scene). She describes him as being 'obsessed' with Mike, and says writers really wanted to get that obsession across. I agree with Will having been one note during season 4, him hopefully having more time to shine in the approaching season, but I thoroughly disagree with him coming off as obsessive. I suppose our camera man displayed the guy's little glances at Mike so often that my Mama felt it was overdone, and unable to be ignored. I also think she's just avoiding use of the word 'love' when describing anything homosexual.

She still doesn't think Mike demonstrates how much he loves El enough to leave no room for debate. According to her, his moments with her seem surface level. Just as a reminder she does not know my thoughts. She watched that entire 'I love you' thing and still isn't secure in any genuineness of the guy. I believe she supposes that we're intended to acknowledge milkvan's romance, but also probe it.

I now wonder whether my Mama was good enough representation for the average audience, because she actually does own a bias - this being that she usually actively dislikes gay things. So I puzzle over whether her brain overanalyzed any of the boys' highlights, wanting to "expose" their homo intentions. At first things were up in the air, but it became clear that Mike did not pass her gaydar, he was simply too intimate with Will to make that pass. And this wasn't the case in other seasons, she never questioned their friendship til now. She also hasn't acknowledged any supposedly queer relationships besides rickie (vobin?) and byler, meaning that other fan favourites such as elmax, steddie, ronance and such else didn't stand out as gay to her. This doesn't signify those other relationships to not have a chance, I'm elmax's personal cheersquad, it's plainly clear that my mother didn't have a tendency to point at every same sex relationship and yell suspicious. Byler was purely undeniable. You can thank Will's love being canoned for this, otherwise noone would have a need to read into Mike.

I don't know whether she supposes byler to have a chance moreso than the milk in the van, even with Mike's ambiguity. It would seem that as of right now her guess is that watchers are intended to second guess both relationships in order to build up interest. However, she doesn't know how unlikely Will's love life is to turn out negatively seeing as those damn writers manipulated crowds into consistently sympathizing for him. Dunno about the rest of you but that sounds like good news to me.

I have no idea how to close this analysis. Is it an analysis? There's much more I want to say, much more she said, but I fear this to be too jam-packed and aimless as is. I'm writing a third part to my most recent milkthevan failing relationship deep dive, and that'll possibly consist of thoughts I wish to input after gathering so much data from my mother.

#stranger things #stranger things 4 #byler #anti milkvan #anti mileven #mike and will #mike x will #gay mike wheeler #mike wheeler #will byers #byler is endgame #byler is real #byler is canon #stranger things byler #byler thoughts #byler proof #byler rights #byler endgame #stranger things 4 byler #byler analysis #byler tumblr #byler nation #byeler

[arkhamknightz]

WHEN WALLY FALLS IN LOVE

pairing : wally west x superhero!reader

summary/ask: “would you be ok writing something fluffy-domestic with a gender neutral/ non-binary superhero reader? Like what they like to do together when they're at home or at the other's appartment? I personally think Wally's a huge romantic guy and that he'd love to have someone who's also very into that. Not like big/expensive demonstration of love, but more subtle/little things but very meaningful. (I would love to quote poems to that handsome and lovely redhead hahaha)”

warnings: title based off of “when emma falls in love” by taylor swift (sorry i have a song title theme going on at the moment idk why its just so cutesy to me so sorry)

notes: i hope i did this justice.. i kinda just found a poem off the internet?:?/? i dont know of many poems so i hope thats okay, i tried to incorporate like small gestures like the sidewalk rule and having your partners things all over your space if that makes sense? anywho i hope this lives up to expectations :’)

It was no secret Wally loved to flirt, even as your current boyfriend. He had an arm draped around your shoulder as you both walked down the street into your apartment. Nothing important had been going on for the last day, so you both decided to stay over at his apartment at take advantage of it.

He looked over at you and smiled, making sure he stayed between you and the street as you guys made your way to his building. A pair of headphones were being shared between the both of you, a wired earbud dangling from your ears as you walked close together. Wally claimed listening to music sounded better with his wired earbuds, although you knew it was so he had an excuse to be closer to you.

He opened the door for you as you reached the apartment building. Your hands intertwined as he walked you both to the elevator, you pressed your finger on his floor number and out of the corner of your eye, you see a smile take over his face. No matter how long you’ve both been dating, he loves you just as much as the day before. He knew the floor of his apartment wasn’t crazy information. But, you had clicked it without thinking twice. It made his heart flutter.

As you both made it into his apartment, you kicked your shoes off right next to his and jumped on his couch, grabbing your favorite blanket. The smile on his face hadn’t left, Wally completely infatuated by you. You knew to kick off your shoes without a single thought, and your favorite blanket being on the couch of his place filled his heart with so much love.

He walked up behind you, leaning over the couch to wrap his arms around you and kiss your head softly. “I love you.” You turned around to look at him, a smile across your face as you gave him a small kiss. “I love you too!”

He pulled away to walk to his kitchen, a shelf in the pantry completely dedicated to your favorite foods, snacks and drinks. You had a designated area in every room of his apartment. Your side of the bed where your bedside table was littered with little trinkets and a book you had been reading out loud for the both of you before going to sleep. You had your section of the shower and the sink, part of his closet and dressers, storage area under his bed for your suit and any other things you may wanna leave over.

He grabs a new snacks for the both of you before sitting next to you on the couch. You pick up the other half of your blanket, placing it over his legs with a smile on your face as he sets the snacks down on the coffee table. He hands you the remote as you log into his streaming services, clicking on his profile before settling on a movie you both had talked about wanting to watch.

He looked around, a smile on his face as he knew both of your apartments were crawling with each others items. He even made sure any of your favorite foods that needed to be frozen or kept in the fridge was in your own area so he remembered not to eat them. Wally made sure to keep his apartment stocked for you, checking each area every week before grocery shopping to see what he needed to stock up on for you.

You consumed his every thought, he was so helplessly in love with you. Everything he did in his day to day life made him think of you. Out on a mission and he speeds by some flowers? He makes a mental note to bring you a new bouquet or pick some of the ones he saw on the way back home. Going to the store? He keeps an eye out for anything else you may want, like a plushie or a new snack he think you would enjoy.

He sees a dog out on a walk outside? He’s snapping a photo to send to you or tells you about it once you both get back home. It’s no secret Wally’s scared to loose you. What you both do is dangerous, so he makes sure to appreciate every little thing about you, even the things that remind him of you deserved to be appreciated.

You both sat in silence watching the movie, no words needing to be spoken between the both of you as you sat cuddled on his couch. You were practically sitting on his lap, both of his arms were wrapped around you, his body chest against your back as he rested his chin on your shoulder.

His hand soothingly rubbed against your skin, an occasional kiss was landed on your neck as you watched together. There was nothing you appreciated more than Wally’s small gestures of love. He planned every date with as much effort as your first, your vase of flowers that you kept in your apartment hadn’t been left empty since you both met. Even while on long missions he made sure you somehow got your flowers.

By the time the sun had started to set, Wally brought you both up to his apartment buildings rooftop, a place that you both commonly hung out at together. A small poem book was held in your hand as you both sat against the wall, your head instantly landing on his shoulder.

You opened to a random page, a small smile gracing your features as you looked at the sky, then at your boyfriend who had a wide grin on his face. You took a look back down at the floor before beginning to read.

“I love your hands. They are big hands, firm hands, gentle hands. Hair grows on the back near the wrist, I have seen the nails broken and stained from hard work. And yet when you touch me, I grow small… and quiet… and happy. If I might only grow small enough, to curl up into the hollow of your palm. Your left palm, curl up, lie close, and cling, so that I might know myself always there.. even if you forgot.”

He smiled, a small chuckle leaving his mouth. “If we don’t get married one day I’m gonna be so pissed off.” You smiled at him, a laugh escaping from your lips. “Really? Like how pissed off scale from 1-10” He pretended to think for a moment. “100” “That wasn’t an option.” “I know but 10 wasn’t big enough to prove how upset I would be.”

He looked over at you with a smile. He always seemed to be smiling while he was around you, huh? A single look at him and anyone could see how in love he is with you. Coming up on the rooftop and reading a page out of a small poetry book he had gotten you was a nightly tradition. No matter what time it was, before settling down, no matter where you were, the small booklet was brought out for a page reading.

The red haired boy took a look at you, the sunsets remaining light making you glow. You both stood up after spending a few more minutes outside quietly speaking to each other. You both walked hand in hand back to his apartment, kicking off your slides before changing and hopping into his bed.

He walked in behind you after a few minutes, your favorite coffee mug in his hand. “Got you a drink.” He smiled at you, a small kiss being placed on his cheek as he placed it on your bedside table. “Mm gonna go shower and get changed alright?” He looked at you, a soft expression painted on his face.

You looked up at him and smiled brightly, eyes full of love as you nodded and gave him one last kiss. “Mmkay, just don’t take too long” He let out a soft chuckle. “I won’t, I promise.” He took one last glance at you before leaving to walk into the bathroom, a small grin and a light blush was left on your face. Wallace West is completely and utterly in love with you. And he knew that would never change.

#wally west #wally west x reader #kid flash #kid flash x reader #young justice #flash #the flash #flash x reader #wallace west x reader #wally west fluff #wally west fanfic #wally west fanfiction #kid flash fluff #kid flash fanfic #kid flash fanfiction #young justice x reader

[livefastdriveyoung]

Author is writing a think piece, this is an OPINION. Author is not stating facts, merely making some observations, please do not take this as fact. Narrative is in storytelling and sounds confident but it is an opinion. AUTHOR HAS NO INSIDE KNOWLEDGE. THIS IS NOT FACT. If author speculates, it is not on purpose, it is just meant to be a thought piece.

Yeah ok let's talk about Nico Rosberg:

Here's how I view it. One of your best friends from childhood isn't like you. He's black in a sport that doesn't give space to anyone that's not White European, he doesn't come from money, he's in fact struggling to even travel to competitions, and he's good.

He's so good that you and your world champion father are so sure he will be in F1. You get there first but that next season he's in McLaren and he's second.

Then he's first.

You're thrilled for him. He's your best friend. He's talking about how he wants to change the world, and even then you know he doesn't just mean racing, he means the world.

Then in 2013, you're together. Michael Schumacher is gone, and you're first driver and you know Lewis and you could change the world. Sebastian wins, again, but the future feels bright.

In 2014, the car is competitive. No, it's a winner. You know you're capable, it's in your blood. You know Lewis is capable, he's done it before.

Then, Jules crashes. Everyone holds each other a little tighter. Lewis wins, but there is less jealousy and more knowing that it can be done.

Then, Lewis wins again. The team orders are killing you. You know you're capable, but Lewis is better. That's what everyone tells you. He's better, he's faster, and this boy that you have known your whole career, this man who is your closest friend, is also the scale by which you are measured.

And you snap. You have to win. It is in your blood. 2016 is vicious. The world watches as you both throw hats and towels and words in different tongues. Lewis doesn't back down, but in the end, it is not enough.

You win. And then you walk away. You have the title, have lost the friendship, and you have changed.

"we're not friends" is the quote that follows you for years. He runs away when you go for an interview. He doesn't say your name. You don't either.

"Are you a better driver than you were in 2016?" "yes. and teammate." Live and in stereo right in your face.

Something changes after that. You live in the same building, and you sometimes ride the elevator together, but the awkwardness is not there, not like it was. He is kind to your children, the ones who would have called him Uncle Lewis. He sends them Christmas gifts.

You heal your heart and your friendship. You see that even at 40 and seven world championships, the boy you knew still has to prove himself. He still fights every day to change the world. Except now that he's got the platform, people are far harsher than they used to be. Every initiative is met with backlash, every comment taken out of context.

So you resolve to talk about him. You talk about his skill and his talent. You talk about how Ferrari is lucky, how Lewis had always wanted to wear red, who didn't? You talk about how he still drives like he's hungry, hunting, and you don't stop.

Because more than anything, you remember that little kid who no one talked to because he didn't look like everyone else. And the people with the same platform as you still continue to try and isolate him, bring him down, halt change in its footsteps.

Lewis wants to change the world. So do you. You have looked at the environment, the women who want to race, and children like Lewis who had to fight to get anywhere. So you talk and you talk and you talk, because advocacy can be subtle, it can be through talking about how someone is so talented, how they deserve everything they have. It can be about how age doesn't preclude you from talent. It can be about how women in sport are going to be the future. You say it out loud, because you can.

Love is a difficult master, but it is with you always. You love the sport, you love your family, you love your friends and the things you have done together.

Wouldn't you rise to the defense of someone you love and respect?

Author is writing a think piece, this is an OPINION. Author is not stating facts, merely making some observations, please do not take this as fact. Narrative is in storytelling and sounds confident but it is an opinion. AUTHOR HAS NO INSIDE KNOWLEDGE. THIS IS NOT FACT. If author speculates, it is not on purpose, it is just meant to be a thought piece.

#nico rosberg #lewis hamilton #f1 #mercedes amg f1 #brocedes #china gp 2024 #chinese gp 2024 #ellethoughts #this is an opinion #please don't sue me #thanks #I am just thinking about things #no facts #not fact focused #obviously the championship years are facts

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for arguing with someone over ships?

🧀⛵ so i can find this later

Yes, this is ship discourse AITA #294729472 you can scroll away, english isn't my first language, my apologies.

So I (16M (But 13-14 at the time)) am in a very niche fandom. As in, we didn't have any new content for the past 5 years and media is old af (2013), very few fans, most of us know each other already.

I used to have these mutuals Cheese (Not their real name) (around my age i think?? I can't remember) and Breadstick (Not his real name) (18M).

We all had our little ships, ok? I like the little (dumbass golden retriever boy) x (badass traumatized man) ship, Cheese liked the little (badass traumatized man) x (literally the same thing but evil and abusive) and Breadstick liked both ships.

I met Breadstick before meeting Cheese so we were already friends before i met Cheese. I thought "Cool, another person likes this little niche thing i'm hyperfixated on!" So we became mutuals.

I didn't anticipate that we would argue about ships, but oh well. So, i'm a very chill person regarding ships, literally any, although i do have NOTPs, i'm not really toxic about my hatred, i just go "Ah, not my thing" and scroll away not without blocking the person, but really nothing personal and no hard feelings, i can perfectly be friends with someone who loves my notp.

In fact, that was the case with Cheese. They shipped my NOTP, like A LOT. But I was okay with it, i mean these are just characters and all we're doing is being silly. I didn't take this THAT seriously. However, when I seemed to talk about my ship, Cheese seemed uncomfortable in some way.

When I was talking about my fankid (call me cringe idc) of my OTP, Cheese got very confused and asked who was i talking about. Breadstick came in and introduced my fankid to them, since he knew about it before. Cheese just started being rude, literally saying swear words (Not against them but, the context didn't really call for it? No one was being mean or mad), saying, and i quote as best as i can, "I don't know what the fuck made you think i knew who the hell [Fankid] was".

I got very mad about it, so i privately dm'ed Breadstick about Cheese's attitude. We began trash talking about them, which, i admit was a very trashy thing to do and definitely asshole material™.

Reason why may i be the asshole: over time, Breadstick just started complaining a lot about Cheese, and I could honestly agree, it came to the point of us disliking them to some degree but not telling them and not breaking the mutual, that could be considered two faced behavior.

This was partly influenced because of another incident. So Cheese and Breadstick where rambling about an OT3 (3 person ship) they had in common, basically sharing ideas and stuff. I thought it would be fun and went "Hey, I have an OT3 too, maybe i should post about it too". So I went and posted about it, but Cheese felt very uncomfortable with that, since basically my OT3 was exactly like Cheese's OT3 but one character is different, "basically".

They said "You have your thing, let US have ours". Felt bad and honestly, maybe i shouldn't have intruded their ot3 rambling. I didn't expect such negative reaction out of them.

In other occasions they complained about me posting a little too much about my ship, even though they did the same thing with theirs. And they also had a mutual that said "If you ship [this character] you suck and i fucking hate you. [character] is too abusive to be shipped with anyone and you can't just make an AU, that would just change him as a character completely" which, dear god, that language wasn't needed, right?. And despite that crazy person saying that, Cheese agreed with their take, despite literally shipping the character in question with another one. And abusively too, which like you do you, lord knows i do that too, but agreeing with a take like that while doing exactly what it is complaining about is weird. On the other side, that person wasn't my mutual, so it's unrealistic of me to expect Cheese to control their mutuals over me, Cheese can mutual whoever they want, but i can still be weirded out right?

That is without including them telling other people to kill themselves over shipping, so it was clear that Cheese took this shipping thing seriously while me and Breadstick to some degree didn't. Honestly another reason why i might be an asshole, clearly they felt their otp was personal and me not liking it + ignoring it caused a bad environment, mala mía, but what else could i have done?

So, clearly Cheese is kind of an asshole to some degree. But i think what makes ME an asshole too is when I trash talked behind their back and cut them off way later than i should've. And also, i guess i shoved my ship down their throat taking by how mad they were about it? I didn't do it intentionally though and i could definitely say they did the same thing too when 80% of the fandom and character tags was them posting about their ship. Again, small niche fandom for old unpopular media, we are keeping it alive ourselves.

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole #ship discourse #posts that make me crave one of those lil cheese dip breadstick snack packs #which i have not eaten in roughly uhhhh at least a decade and a half #but the taste. you never forget that taste

[bluewhitehues]

Hug | Kim Mingyu

Summary: You secretly like your bestfriend chan,he has no idea and sets you up on a blind date with his friend and hyung Mingyu.

Genre: Angst? (Little bit), comfort, strangers to lovers, fluff

Pairing : Idol Kim Mingyu × (f) reader

Warning: mentions of anxiety

Part 3

The drive to your apartment was quite awkward, mingyu dropped you off and you guys parted ways saying bye.

There was a longing in Mingyu's heart.. he really had prayed and hoped that you both will get along, may be will go on few more dates to know each other . But alas that didn't happen.

After going home you showered and made yourself some quick dinner ...you were eating when you got Chan's call, at that moment all you wanted to do was curse at him shout at him so you picked up his call, " you should've told me if you had a death wish why pull such a stunt chan? " you were talking so calmly he got scared "hey why are you talking like that you're scaring meeee"

"YOU SHOULD BE SCARED CAUSE THE MOMENT I SEE YOU IM GOING TO KILL YOU, DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA WHAT YOU DID , YOU SENT ME ON A DATE WITH KIM MINGYU DO YOU KNOW WHO HE'S? LIKE YOU SHOULD'VE ATLEAST WARNED ME , IM NOT A CELEBRITY IM A NORMAL PERSON-"

He cut you off "FIRST OF ALL STOP SHOUTING..and what's wrong with it if he's a celebrity and you're not? I'm also an idol and you're bestfriends with me I don't see any problem here? And about the other thing ..y/n I'm really sorry I lied about it being a blind date but if I had told you you'd have said no.. he really likes you ,that idiot thought we both are a thing can you imagine lol, and then I guessed that he likes you and he didn't deny so I came up with this plan ...also he thought you knew and said yes to the date with him ,he didn't know okayy? He might be coming for me I'm so dead ...see.. I worked so hard for you and you're not even grateful-,"

You huffed loudly "Grateful my a$$.. you should not do this with anyone's feelings chan he must've felt so bad he thought I said yes and was all excited do you know how bad Im feeling?"

Now chan got alarmed , "hold on, why are you feeling so bad? WAIT TF UP DID YOU BY ANY CHANCE SAY NO TO HIM ??? I SWEAR TO GOD Y/N-"

And now in this one fine moment your pretty brain realised you gotta tell chan ..AND WHAT WILL YOU TELL HIM ???? OMG ...I said no to Mingyu because I like you? Because I like someone else? He knows literally everyone in your life and would not believe your lie and now you're freaking out you don't even have mingyu's number, what if you tell one lie and mingyu tells another you'd be caught right away so no you need to talk to Mingyu.

So you blurt out, "N-NOOO we just- we just went through it...AND OMG I'M REMEMBERING IT JUST NOW I left my purse in his car and I don't even have his number IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT send me his number right nowww" and you saved the moment just like that (you hoped it didn't sound too fake or extra)

Chan thinks something is fishy but thinks he'll find out anyway so he doesn't press you anymore.."you couldn't even ask for his number yourself seriously y/n you've got no game-" That brat thrives on teasing and annoying you.

"if you don't shut up and just send me his number right now you won't only have to worry about mingyu coming for you... sleep with one eye open cause I'm also coming for you-"

He laughs at you, " ok, okay let's all calm down..check your messages I sent the number..also you owe me full explanation and details tomorrow"

"whateverrrr bye."

"hey atleast tell me how was the date."

"NO.. someone once said *That's all you're getting* " you quoted his words from when you asked him about who is gonna be your date.

He whined about how that wasn't fair before you ended the call.

You were nervous as fuvk because what are you going to say to Mingyu it already feels bad enough but now you've to come up with a plan to tell chan. So before chan could go to Mingyu,you called him.

After dropping you off Mingyu went to his and wonwoo's shared apartment, where as soon as he entered wonwoo asked him about the date. Mingyu said it was okay, good, wonwoo then asked him why does he look so sad ..mingyu said he doesn't think it'll work out that's why ..and asks wonwoo to not to tell others about anything because he knew just like that all of them will know, that means chan will know as well and he promised you he would not let him know,he'll keep it a secret.

He was about to go to bed when you called him he was surprised but he picked up the call.

"uh Hello Mingyu? It's me y/n ...sorry ,did I disturb you?"

"Hey no you didn't ..what's up everything ok? "

"yeah everything's fine just uh Chan called me actually and I don't know what to tell him..I just I thought we should tell him the same thing so he wouldn't doubt ...I'm sorry I feel terrible to trouble you like this".

"I told you not to say sorry ..you can talk to me comfortably just how you talk to your friends it's ok .. "

"okay I won't say sorry again."

He smiled a little ..he has never talked to you that much, that too on call it's first time hearing your voice..he thinks you sound so sweet and he wishes he'd get to talk to you more often.."hmm that's good ..also about chan what options do we have?"

"if I say I like someone else he won't believe me so that's out of the option ..and If I say I said no he'll ask me the reason.." you sighed "I can't seem to find any reason to tell him"

"I see um then...we can just say we decided to be just friends? "

"that sounds good" you thought that's the safest answer.

"yeah soo.. is it ok for us to be friends? " He really wanted you to say yes .. he'd manage with just that.. being your friend.

You can't see him yet you can picture his hopeful eyes..."will you be ok?..with being my friend" You ask.

Mingyu thinks a little ..he thinks he'll take it as much as close he'll be able to stay with you he'll take it, it is dangerous but right now his heart,mind, soul everything just decides that yes they want it..

"Honestly, I've mostly seen you from distance yet I thought you were amazing so..I...I would like to be your friend and who knows someday you'll realise I'm hotter than chan and finally confess to me ..wow I would like to see that day." He's mischievously smiling right now and then he hears it your laugh..one of his most favourite things in the world ..he could hear it forever.

You laugh.."Mingyu seriously" he also laughs a little with you.

"I'd like to be your friend too mingyu but ...I know how it's like to be friends with someone you like..and I wouldn't recommend that ...it can be hard sometimes." You don't want to think about those moments again when you're trying to move on but you wouldn't want mingyu to feel like that as well.

He sighs," well I'm a tough guy " he's not...but he'd do anything to get to know you better ..he doesn't want to regret anything in his life.

"Ok then it's settled ... we're friends from now on"...you're smiling now

"yeah we are ...I like it" he's smiles softly.

.

.

Author's note: Hey everyone this is it for today, hope you enjoy it❤️

Part 4 👇🏻

#seventeen x reader #seventeen #svt x reader #svt angst #kimmingyuff #kimmingyu #kim mingyu #mingyu×reader #seventeen mingyu #svtanst #svt fluff #svt #svt dino #jeon wonwoo #wonwoo #lee chan #seventeenimagines #seventeenangst #seventeen fanfic #mingyu #fanfic #seventeen ff

[sabosbabygirl]

Ok so like the other day I quoted how Simon and König would absolutely despise each other. It’s only natural for them to as they’re on opposite forces. Lets say the reader gets involved or has been for awhile. Simon and König in a brawl is rotting my brain from the inside out. I just need someone to write this. I’m manifesting 💆🏽‍♀️König on top of Simon throwing blows at him cause let’s face it I love Simon but he’d get slammed by König.

Okay!! So this is an easy and light read but I can do more detailed one if you want my love ❤️

The Mountain vs the Wind

“No matter how the wind howls, the mountain cannot bow to it” – The Emperor, Mulan

You have known Simon and Konig for a long time now. You are a private contractor who works where the money is, therefore you’ve worked with both of them. You noticed the tension right away. To big guys giving each other glares. You were never sure why aside from Simon being SAS and Konig being a contractor himself. You know that they both work for different forces but when duty calls, they have to set aside their differences and act like men….which they seem to hate.

It was a normal Tuesday, you, Simon and Konig have Combat Arms training today. Something about throwing down these men whom are more than half your size excites you, but today, you were the instructor and they were the fighters. This is normal. It’s normal for one of the best combat arms personnel to be the instructor and although they hated to admit it, you were the best when it came to fighting without a weapon. Prior to beginning you had them stretching. Simon was in his fatigue pants and a short sleeve shirt with his mask on and Konig was in his brown cargo pants, long sleeve shirt and mesh on. Neither had tactical gear or weapons, hence the name “combat arms”. You secretly loved seeing both without tactical gear..mainly Konig because of his size, even though Simon was your boyfriend. You and Simon agreed to keep your guys relationship out of any mission/training aspect. This was to help not cloud your thoughts.

“On your feet and to the mat” you barked the orders. You were in charge and it’s important that they understand that their size and skill doesn’t intimidate you because you are just as good as they are.

Simon is on your left and Konig is on your right, you are in the middle. It’s like WWE but without the cage, chairs and crowd. Konig was standing like a tall mountain that he is: tall, not hunched over, confident. Then Simon, standing tall, he was fast when it came to killing, you often referred to him as the wind, comes and goes.

You look at them both “Remember this is training. First one to brings the other to the ground wins. The rules: no kicks to the head and once on the ground that’s it, nothing more. Got it?” you say, both nod…knowing damn well this is going to turn into a brawl. “Fight” you yell. You watch their steps carefully; both seizing each other up and down. Simon shuffles to the left two paces, Konig copies. Konig steps forward, Simon steps forward. Simon takes the first swing by upper cutting Konig in the ribs. Konig huffs and then does the same to Simon, who in return huffs. It’s very “Simon says”. Konig is letting Simon call the shots…you can tell. You have seen Konig take down men easily, but this was different. Like Konig had a reason for what he was doing.

They dance around for a bit throwing random jabs at each other, you lowkey start getting bored and wonder when…..BOOM….Konig does a roundhouse kick knocking Simon off his feet. Simon quickly gets up. He is 100% smirking under that mask, “now this is a fight” he exclaims kicking Konig in the chest….but Konig catches it. Pulls Simon in and body slams him to the ground. Normally this where it ends, but neither stopped and you, you were enjoying it a little more than you should so you allowed it. Konig on top of Simon, punching his rib cage, Simon maneuvering himself slightly enough to be able to get Konig in the groin…ouch. From your angle you were turned on. The sight of both of them sweating through their shirts, blood starting to form and seeing the outline of Konigs muscles in his long sleeve shirt…..wait, Simon is your boyfriend.

“OKAYYYYY!!” you scream….looking down at both of them. Konig managed to get Simon in the eye, you know damn well his ribs are hella bruised and you saw Konig punch the shit out of Simon’s jaw…so that is going to leave a nasty mark. However, Konig also had some injuries, strained groin, sprained wrist from Simon grabbing it and most likely a cut on his head from Simon headbutting him. It was honestly sexy seeing them. Konig was still on Simon, sweat and blood dripping. “Get off mate”, Simon aggressively said. Simon looked at you “I thought the rules were to take down, not damn near kill each other”, “yeah” Konig chimed. That might be the first time they agreed on something.

“Well you are right, but I was enjoying it”, you told them with an evil smirk. Both looked at you and then at each other. “She’s your girl” Konig said, “mmmm…..yeah…..lets go” Simon said. Both went to the medical tent to get fixed up.

A couple hours before

“I want you to get them to agree or at least knock the senses into both of them”, the Commander said. “We need them to work together and have some common ground before I send you three out there”. “I will do my best Sir” you replied.

#simon ghost riley #konig cod #ghost cod #light read #ghost x könig x reader

[contritecactite]

Radio Omens time!! Strap in for my subjective personal opinions made by one person about the full-cast radio adaptation of Good Omens.

We're gonna begin with: I am blowing kisses to the scripting/editing/production team. This thing is an impeccable adaptation. Im-pecc-a-ble. The voice talent is fantastic, the energy is stellar, the pacing is excellent, and the sheer amount of atmospheric info they managed to translate into radio-friendly format? Mwah mwah mwah. I think it's the kind of listening format that's not for everyone, but it is SO for me.

Time for some specific highlights! It was a long day so we're a little extra silly this time. It's also long and not in a reasonable order.

(Ok good my page cut is working this time.)

- Good GOD I forgot the primary voices were Like That. I shrieked (happily) as soon as Aziraphale's mouth opened. This is why I travel alone /hj

-- (Incidentally, I said "oh fuck holy shit I can't do this" when Crowley started talking, but I did it anyway *sighs in bisexual*)

- Hheeeennghsh the opening scene in Eden is. The way it's written successfully sets up who Aziraphale and Crowley are, who they're supposed to be to each other, and a hint at who they're going to be to each other later because they are SO delightfully snippy at one another in this scene. Aziraphale's "oh, it's you" and Crowley's "mmhm, yeah, well done on keeping demons away. Bravo" (heavily paraphrased) will be living rent-free in my head until I have time to write a fic about it.

- So, having Aziraphale do the early narration is an excellent way of setting the tone. What I need you to do, if you've only done tv omens (which is so so valid and I think really is another excellent adaptation), is remember Aziraphale's magician persona. And then imagine him being that for the entire story. The pitch, the rate of speech, the slightly frantic energy, the drama: it's all just part of his overarching character in radio omens, and it's SO good for storytelling.

- Radio Crowley knows what's in all of Aziraphale's infamous Bibles so well that he can quote them. I love this detail, I love it as a means of establishing their relationship during their "let's be godfathers" scene, and I love how hard he's ribbing poor Aziraphale about the extra verses in Genesis.

- Radio Crowley is SO like... tender? I mean, all Crowleys are to some extent Soft but something about this one has just a little extra something. I love the way he talks about his temptations and shenanigans. He's so proud. It eases what could feel like needless exposition because he really seems to like explaining his process.

- That's a bit of the same of what I mean about Aziraphale's personality. Since he's very obviously inclined to dramatize a story, exposition just fades neatly into his character rather than grating on the nerves.

- They reference The Arrangement a lot and usually with a great deal of affection. There's one particular time when they even acknowledge something about wanting to protect each other.

- I adore the way Anathema and her ties to Agnes are introduced. It's so concise but meaningful, and it's just the right amount of setup for her character appearing later.

- The baby swap scene in other iterations relies so much on descriptive narrative or visual language, but you know what? The heavily trimmed down version also works surprisingly well.

- Crowley knows about the hellhound way beforehand (and, of course, he tells Aziraphale. They plan their roles for the party years in advance, which is an extremely efficient way of communicating about that scene to the listener).

- At Warlock's party in the book, Crowley gets all suspicious about a gerbil being gifted to him. In the radio drama, Aziraphale wonders aloud if the gerbil might be suspicious and Crowley tells him not to be stupid. Just struck me as a funny thing to shuffle around.

- Adult radio Anathema is everything to me actually.

- Poor Newt's childhood gets skipped over (unless I missed it, which is possible), but I liked his adult introduction as well; it brings in the whole Witchfinder-adjacent cast at once and makes it super clear how they all know each other without lingering.

- Shadwell. Just. The actor's voicework is so evocative of someone who is very gesturally expressive. There's no way he wasn't swinging his hands around in the recording space.

- The Them are all 100% perfect. Shout-out to Adam for that mind-rending scream that I was not expecting to go on for so long. Interestingly, in chapter credits, the Them are not grouped with the humans! This makes sense, but it also made my brain go !!!

- The horsepeople (both original and extra) were also so good, and that chunk of the cast gave the impression of good chemistry, so the scenes were really fun.

- Crowley says Aziraphale's name a lot. A lot a lot. Actually, most people do; probably for simplicity's sake, there's no "Mr. Fell," or "Nanny Ashtoreth," just "Mr. Aziraphale" and "Mr. Crowley."

- Well, Shadwell does say "Mr. A," and there is a Brother Francis.

- One of Nanny's rules for Warlock is "don't talk to the creepy gardener" rkahjdjs Crowley what is wrong with you

- I did in fact let out another sound when the Nanny voice happened. We're not talking about it.

- When applying for the jobs, Aziraphale just straight up calls dibs on gardener and Crowley complains and says something like "can you see me in a skirt?" and Aziraphale just pulls a date at random on which he'd seen Crowley in a skirt. This was probably also in the book, but I noticed it here and didn't there.

- Crowley's idea of something calming to listen to was a radio gardening talk show ;~; and he likes listening to televangelists for the lulz (I have never used that phrase before in my life but I'm keeping it)

- Having him hear Aziraphale possessing the televangelist was absolute genius for keeping the plot cohesive.

- Seance scene continues to be painful ahahaha...

- Hell's emissaries know that Aziraphale was discorporated and they're mean to Crowley about it in a way that implies Hell has long been aware that they're working together. Intriguing...

- There's mention at some point about how no homes in Tadfield have PlayStations or Xboxes, and I think that's a cool bit of writing to establish the time period (along with Newt bricking smartphones, which I think was said at least in breadcrumbs).

- Almost forgot, but Mr. Gaiman and Sir Terry Pratchett being the policemen trying to book Crowley for speeding in the beginning is so cute.

- When Satan is about to show up, Aziraphale worrying about everyone else and Crowley going "and me!" like hello, I am also in danger, that's my boss?? if u even care?? was SO funny in this version to me.

- Look, there were a lot more things, but it's already been several hours since it ended, so I'm sure I'm forgetting many.

- Oh! Pepper's backstory being transformed into her speech to Adam was SO good on so many levels. It really drove home that Adam does love his friends, it deepened their lore gradually, it made Adam's role and decisions very clear, and it also struck me as "Pepper says trans rights" even if that wasn't the intention, so hell yeah.

- The gag reel leads me to believe that Peter Serafinowicz is A) probably the funniest person alive to work with and B) extremely relatable due to the amount of time spent on the struggle bus. Also whoever put the breaking glass sound over all the accidental swears, I love you forever.

#good omens #radio omens #reading notes #cactus chatter #maybe i just need a new tag like “dran being unreasonably feral about good omens for way too many words” #suggestive #maybe?

[cwritesforfun]

TSITP: Conrad Fisher x Fem!Reader: Confessions

Y/N = Your Name

Masterlist

Conrad's POV

I sit on the beach by a fire with a beer next to Jeremiah. I ask "Why aren't you partying with everyone else? This is not like you." He answers "I ... the person I like is dancing with someone else. I wish they were with me. How do you do it?" I ask "Do what?" He answers "Watch Y/N dance and hang out with other guys." I reply "Oh... uh this is the first time I've ever seen her dance with other guys. She usually just talks to them. I've liked her for years but never had the guts to say it. So it's kind of my fault that she's with other guys and not me. I wish she was with me. She makes me so happy." I feel someone's arms wrap around my neck and I smell Y/N's perfume. I look up and see Y/N smiling down at me. I wonder if she heard anything I said. I smile back at her and say "Hi, what are you doing over here?" She answers "I want to leave. Those guys are gross and I'm tired." I smell alcohol on her breath, so I doubt she will remember this. Whew. But also I kind of wish she had heard me confessing my feelings accidentally and we could go on a date. I want to take her out and treat her right. I reply "Ok, we can leave. Did you hear anything when you walked up?" She answers "You smell really good, Conrad. How have I never noticed that and not shared it with you?" UHHHH ?!?!? I hear Jeremiah ask "Y/N, how much did you have to drink?" Y/N answers "Uhhhhh how much is too much? I had at least 2 drinks maybe more. I lost count." Jeremiah laughs and says "Well come on, let's go."

Y/N gets off me and we all walk to the cars. Y/N ends up leaning against me as we walk to the car.

We get home and Y/N follows me to my room. She's been staying in my room while I'm in town, even though she lives in town. She just doesn't want to miss anytime with me or at least that's what she told me.

NEXT MORNING - Y/N's POV

I wake up to my head pounding and my stomach churning. I make it to the bathroom where I throw up. I then lay on the floor after brushing my teeth. I'm tired.

I close my eyes and try to remember bits of my night. I remember going to the party and wanting to drink. I almost never want to drink, but it had been a bad day for me. I remember guys flirting with me and asking if I wanted to go home with them. I was annoyed by that. I remember seeing Conrad with Jeremiah by a fire. Conrad said something about his crush on me. I wanted to go home. Wait! CONRAD SAID HE HAD A CRUSH ON ME.

I hear knocking on the bathroom door and Conrad says "Hey Y/N, are you alright? I got you some water." I sit up, open the door, and stand up. I take the water from him and sip it gently. We walk back to his bed where I sit and he sits cautiously next to me. He asks "So what do you remember from last night?" I answer "Small moments throughout the night, but not exact quotes of anything said. I remember wanting to drink my bad day away and the guys at the beach were annoying me with their sex talk. I remember you and Jeremiah sitting by the fire talking about crushes. That's about it." His eyes grow wide and he asks "And how do you feel about my crush?" I answer "I think you should tell her when she's sober and I'm sure she'd let you take her on that date." He half smiles and says "Y/N, I really like you and I've liked you for years. You've always been the girl for me and I've wanted to tell you for years. I was afraid you would not want to be my friend anymore and that you would just hate me for liking you. I'm sorry you found out last night, but also I am glad you found out." I reply "I like you too Conrad and I have liked you for years too." He replies "Well, would you like to go on a date with me?" I reply "I would love nothing more."

#conrad fisher x y/n #conrad fisher x you #conrad fisher x reader #tsitp conrad #conrad fisher #the summer i turned pretty #conrad fisher rec

[charmedreincarnation]

Your desires already exist and are here. It is done

I know Growing up, we’re all told to “reach for the stars” and “follow our dreams.” We’re encouraged to think that our goals and ambitions are only achievable if we strive for them. But it’s wrong, your desires and dreams are already out there, just waiting for you and I know it can be hard to unlearn what we are taught and conditioned.

The truth is, most of what we desire is already available to us, whether it be inner peace, financial freedom, or any other goal. It doesn’t matter how distant and out of reach they may seem. Whether it’s something physical or something intangible, our deepest wishes already exist in the world.

It’s a misconception that desires have to be manifested from something outside yourself. In truth, your desires already exist inside of you, ready to be activated. You don’t have to wait for something to happen in the world before you can start to live the life you want. The key is tapping into that power inside and learning to trust the journey. Your capacity to create and manifest is already within you. It’s a simple matter of recognizing what you want and allowing it to come to life. Whether it’s a career, relationships, or creative projects our your spiritual endeavors, you are capable of achieving anything when you open yourself up to the possibilities within. Don’t be discouraged if progress doesn’t happen overnight.

So Be gentle with yourself and enjoy the process of pulling the dreams out of your heart that have been waiting for you. There is no rush, and if things don’t happen as quickly as you would like, that’s ok.

Take each day as it comes. Let go of any expectations and allow what needs to happen to unfold in its own time. Don’t worry about what other people are doing or what tips and tricks they may be doing to manifest their desires. Trust that your own path is uniquely designed for you and have faith that what needs to happen will show up when it needs to.

Remember that your desires are already here. They are ready to be revealed, created, and experienced. Affirm that in your heart and trust that they will come to fruition when the timing is right and you are ready.

Maybe the key to achieving our dreams isn’t to strive for them, but to train our minds to recognize them in the first place. To learn that even when our dreams elude us, they’re still right in front us – just in different forms.

It’s important to remain hopeful and continue our journey towards our goals. But it’s also important to open our minds and be aware of the possibilities that can often go unnoticed. Learning to be open to new paths, ideas, and opportunities can make the process of pursuing our dreams much smoother.

We should focus not just on what it will take to get us to where we want to be, but on how the world is already helping us get there. On how life is providing us with the necessary tools and resources – even if we don��t recognize them right away. Our desires already exist somewhere in this world, we just have to learn how to tap into them. So the next time you feel your goals slipping away, remember this: your dreams have already been created. They’re just waiting for you. All you have to do is be open to the possibilities that exist and let yourself dream a little bigger.

Now Here are some awesome quotes from some of my favorite figure heads to maybe make your day 🥰🥰

“There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.” -Albert Einstein:

“What we think about, we bring about.” -Dr. Wayne Dyer

“When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you achieve it.”-Deepak Chopra

Just remember everything and everyone is on your side and it’s inevitable to not get your desires. Let go of excluding any potential outcomes, or judgement of yourself or others, and accept that each moment is leading you somewhere. Stay focused on the positive, trusting that what is meant for you will never pass you by, and that when you truly believe, you will have it. As Dr. Wayne Dyer also said, “You'll see it when you believe it.”

#void state #law of assumption #manifesation #reality shifting #law of attraction #quotes

[majorapandahero]

Aight I give up

Of course I started reading a Satoru Gojo x reader fic on my "for you" page and the page reset. So i have resigned myself to ask for help.

I will now try to remember everything i read before it reloaded.

It was an Arranged Marriage kind of AU! Where Gojo and Reader were childhood friends. Reader stayed in the village and wrote Gojo letters while he was away and he never responded; so after a year and a half reader just stopped sending them all together. Stopped asking his whereabouts 2 years in. (turns out Gojo never received them AT ALL)

When Satoru comes back they are both under the impression the other hates them, but when a nasty guy comes up to reader ;introducing himself as a suitor; she backs away, rushing out of the party to throw up in some bushes when Gojo comes out to comfort them. Reader's Mother finds them alone together, shenanigans happen and now they both must be married like... yesterday.

It's a slow burn to a feast they must both host for the clan as leaders. Both walking on eggshells, mostly in the reader's pov; only coming down for breakfast or dinner to speak to Satoru.

At the feast, they are finally getting into a good banter. Even joking on hiding under the table like they use to since the reader doesn't like how many people are at the feast. Geto shows up, introductions are made, and then Geto takes Gojo away to discuss something. Another girl is there, she has many admirers. Reader looks at her then at where Gojo and Geto are and see's that Gojo is looking over at the girl. Girl does a finger beckon call towards Satoru, and he apparently follows.

Of course Misunderstanding, older clan members are asking "where did Satoru go?", "Is he with a mistress?" you know the old people no boundary kind of questions. Reader is heartbroken, but also believes that Satoru doesn't want this marriage in the first place. Geto tries to explain what happened later to the reader over breakfast with gojo nowhere to be seen.

Geto: "I promise it was no what it looked like."

Reader: "What Gojo does is his business," "Maybe I too will find my own way in this marriage." "Geto, I ruined his life didn't I?"

Before Gojo goes away to visit another clan, he tries to talk to reader through the door of her bedroom. She hasn't spoken a word to him since the feast, not coming down for meals or anything. He simply knocks, asks if he can explain, talk or see her. She walks close to the door but doesn't open it. She blows out the candle and head back to bed. Gojo tries again, but gives up and leave her be. It was almost 6 weeks i believe of Satoru being gone.

The reader is plagued with thought of Gojo, hoping he is ok, that this visit shouldn't be taking this long. Others in the clan have also filled her head with thoughts that he is just out there cheating her the reader.

When he does come back, he's splattered with blood (he swears isn't his) and scared the readers maid "Myra" half to death by demanding she get out of the reader's room right then and there.

Gojo thought the reader was going to cheat cause of the "Maybe I too will find my own way in this marriage." Thinking that the time he was gone, he was going to find another man in her chambers. He didn't cause even after feeling heartbroken, Reader still loyal to him. But reader also calls him out for leaving her at the feast alone to go with another woman.

Misunderstandings are finally understood, a quote i remember Satoru said was "If all it took to marry you was to get you alone, i would have shoved you in a closet as soon as you walked into that party."

They both loved each other since childhood, and as soon as they were making up

my screen reset. and i lost it to the tumblr maze of fanfics and hell.

So i ask for help that if anyone knows this fic, the author, anything that can help me find it; i've been scrolling for days and finally lost the will to keep looking without help.

I thank the tumblr users in advance, and a reminder that this is not my idea and i just want to find the writer to appreciate them and love them for their writing was so freaking amazing.

#satoru gojo x reader #jjk x reader #gojo satoru #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu gojo #jujustsu kaisen x reader #jjk gojo #jjk satoru #jujutsu satoru #gojou satoru x reader #satoru gojo #gojo saturo #jujustu kaisen #jjk #arranged marriage #childhood friends #angst #i really hope the writer didn't delete their blog and fic #it happens so often #this was one long fic btw #fanfic #tumblr get a better search function im begging you #someone please help