#i rent a place on cornelia street

[gilbertscarrot]

"i rent a place on cornelia street" i say casually in the car all the while desperately hoping and praying you don't leave me but hey it's cool yeah turn left pls thanks

#she's so real for it #the way she says i rent a place #followed by all this backstory and fears she has #and then she repeats the same line #well that's my life thank you so much for spending time with me #i hope you enjoyed it because i know i did :) #taylor swift #cornelia street #midnights

[coconut-dreamz]

cornelia street

'i'd never walk cornelia street again' | tom blyth x reader

part one

a/n: i wasn't going to post a part two but i always wanted to write a story based of cornelia street and it worked so well !

you blinked a few times at his response. "you couldn't wait until morning?" you answer, rubbing the sleep out of your eyes. he laughs at your comment. "maybe i should've, but i couldn't. i've missed you so much lately. i just had to talk to you." you were silent for a moment, you wondered how you had ended up here. it was just a few years ago when you first met.

we were in the backseat drunk on something stronger than the drinks in the bar "i rent a place on cornelia street" i say casually in the car

you and tom were in a cab headed away from the bar you had just met at. you had previously whispered into his ear between kisses, that you rented a place nearby. you were both more than tipsy and definitely not in the right mindset to be doing this. 

but that didn't matter, you might have been tipsy on the drinks you had, but you were drunk off his kisses. you gave more than the necessary amount of money to the driver as you dragged tom out of the cab and up to your apartment. 

we were a fresh page on the desk filling in the blanks as we go as if the street lights pointed in an arrowhead leading us home

you and tom were walking down the street hand in hand. you'd been seeing each other for a few weeks now. there was no official title on your relationship, you just went on dates and hung out and maybe did things further than kissing sometimes. everything about your relationship was rather spontaneous, but one thing that was constant was that you'd walk home together after every night out. walking hand in hand down cornelia street to your apartment.

and i hope i never lose you, hope it never ends  i'd never walk cornelia street again that's the kind of heartbreak time could never mend i'd never walk cornelia street again

as time went on, tom officially asked you out and you asked him to move into your apartment. things were going amazing, especially since he had just landed the role of coriolanus snow in the newest hunger games movie. you were so proud of him, you always knew that he'd be successful, he was so talented.

as tom began filming for tbosas, a strange feeling filled your stomach. you weren't sure what it was at first, but quickly realized it was jealousy when you saw him and rachel interact over a facetime call one time. you knew that if things ended between you and tom, you  might never recover. 

to you, he was your soulmate, he was the one for you. he was everything. and because of that you knew that if things ever ended, you would never be able to walk cornelia street again. it would remind you too much of tom.

and baby, i get mystified by how this city screams your name and baby, i'm so terrified of if you ever walk away i'd never walk cornelia street again

despite having lived in new york long before you had met tom, the whole city reminded you of him. everywhere you went, you'd be reminded of him. it was both a blessing and a curse for you. he was still gone for filming and you missed him dearly, so it nice to be reminded of him. but every time you thought about how he was filming, you'd be reminded of who he was filming with. rachel. she was so beautiful and so talented, of course tom would rather be with her instead of you. it would be hard to avoid cornelia street if it all were to end. 

back when we were card sharks, playing games i thought you were leading me on i packed my bags, left cornelia street

before you even knew i was gone

you'd had enough of the games you and tom were playing. all the constant fights which led to tom's indifference of your relationship. you were tired of it all. you needed to get away from it, you needed to get away from cornelia street.  you packed up your bags and arranged to stay with a friend, indefinitely. 

too bad tom had caught you as you left, which led to an awkward encounter where you told him you were leaving him and not to contact you for at least 6 weeks. in all honesty, you never expected him to contact you again after that. he seemed so checked out of your relationship lately. 

but then you called, showed your hand i turned around before i hit the tunnel sat on the roof, you and i

"love? you still there? or did you fall asleep?" tom interrupts your reminiscing. "huh? oh yeah, sorry." you answer him,  brought back to reality.  "can i see you soon? i missed you so much. can we just talk about all of this?" he pleads with you. "sure," you almost immediately agree. you'd never thought you'd hear this from him, but it was a welcome surprise. "do you want to get coffee later today? my treat, for waking you up so early. i'm on a short break from filming so i'm back in new york right now." you just hum in response. you can hear a smile in tom's voice as he gives you more details and bids you a goodnight.

you never thought you'd be walking down cornelia street again, but here you were. walking towards the cafe you and tom would always go to, way back when. tom spots you immediately when you walk in. he stands up from his seat and envelopes you in a bear hug. "i've missed you so much." he whispers into the crook of your neck. it takes a moment for you to reciprocate, surprised by the affection and his confession. "i missed you too, tom" you answer him.

you hold my hand on the street walk me back to that apartment years ago, we were just inside barefoot in the kitchen sacred new beginnings that became my religion, listen

after coffee, tom invited you to come over. it felt weird being invited to your own apartment, but you just laughed it off. you had deja vu as you walked down the street with him, hand in hand. as you looked up to the window of your apartment, you remember how you would dance around in the living room together. you remember all of your firsts together in that apartment. 

as you entered your old apartment, it looked just how you'd left it. "i couldn't bear the thought of moving anything around. i knew you'd come back so i kept it just how you like it," tom explains when he sees the look on your face. you just smile at this. "i was hoping you would."

"i rent a place on cornelia street" i say casually in the car

it had been a few weeks since you and tom started talking again. you both came to an agreement that since it was your apartment and he was still filming for the new season of billy the kid, you'd move back in and he could stay with a friend instead. you both knew it was too soon to move back in together. your relationship needed a lot of mending to be done to get to that.

tom was back once again for a short break from filming and you'd gone out to a bar with some friends. in similar fashion to when you first met, you whispered into his ear "i rent a place on cornelia street" in between kisses in a darkened hallway. he just gives you a knowing smile as you led him out the bar and hail a cab. it seemed you both would continue to walk cornelia street again.

#coriolanus snow #tbosas #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #tom blyth #tom blyth imagine #tom blyth x reader #tom blyth x you #coriolanus x reader #tom blyth fluff

[lookwhatyoumademedohaha]

And that kids is, how I met your mother   Chapter 5 - Cornelia Street

We were in the backseat Drunk on something stronger than the drinks in the bar "I rent a place on Cornelia Street" I say casually in the car We were a fresh page on the desk Filling in the blanks as we go As if the street lights pointed in an arrowhead Leading us home

And I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends I'd never walk Cornelia Street again That's the kind of heartbreak time could never mend I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

And baby, I get mystified by how this city screams your name And baby, I'm so terrified of if you ever walk away I'd never walk Cornelia Street again I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

Summary: While you are beginning again in Ravka, Kaz Brekker contemplates and reminisces about how you were the one who quietly made a home in his cold heart and is addicted to the terrible ache in his heart that he feels keenly at your absence in his life. 

Pairing: Nikolai Lantsov x Reader, Nikolai Lantsov x Six of Crows Reader, Kaz Brekker x Reader, Zoya Nazyalensky x Reader (Platonic), Nina Zenik x Reader (Platonic), Genya Safin x Reader (Platonic), Six of Crows x Reader (Platonic). 

Warnings: Pure sweet fluff, humor, lots of angst, unrequited love that might be requited, denial, pining, mentions of death and violence, Dregs being legends, Kaz Brekker being an absolute emotionally constipated asshole in denial.

A/N: Hi everyone! I’m very grateful for your kindness, love and support that encourages me to keep going! I apologize for the delay but here is the long awaited Chapter 5 to this work, you have all been waiting for patiently so thank you for your patience and understanding! I’ve written this chapter from Kaz’ POV explaining his feelings and thoughts because I’ve been wanting to do it for a long time and it was a challenge but I finally did it! 

I hope you all like it and I’m excited! Let me know your thoughts and comments on my work because I really struggled through writer’s block on this one.

I love you all! Happy reading!

Chapter 1 - Until I Found Her

Chapter 2 - Labyrinth

Chapter 3 - Call it what you want

Chapter 4 -  Someone to Stay

Ketterdam was dark and dismal full of hidden secrets and monsters in the shadows. The city was built on blood and secrets and no one knew that better than the man who now ruled it, Kaz Brekker. 

As Kaz Brekker strode through the crowded streets of Ketterdam filled with gullible pigeons and hungry monsters, he felt empty and alone. It was a feeling now he knew all too well though he tried to ignore it. The feeling ached and hurt him in places he didn’t know he had for the last few weeks. Kaz felt terrible these days, his mood completely sour and ill - tempered than usual frightening the Dregs, hurting his enemies and concerning his friends. Kaz couldn’t sleep the last few weeks as he tossed and turned restlessly in his empty and cold bed and in the rare moments he sunk into a fitful slumber, he was dreamt of you and woke up with sweat running down his forehead and gasps. 

In the moments of sleep, he dreamt of you. The dreams always started the same way... there you were smiling at him as he reached for you, as he pressed a hungry kiss onto your sweet lips devouring you eagerly as both of you indulged in happiness and love that was only yours. But it would all fall down when the thick darkness began to envelope their surroundings and though they tried to escape it, you both would be caught in it, trapped within a dark and deserted place where nothing grew. Kaz remembered feeling your hand brush against his in the darkness. It wouldn’t make sense but suddenly the darkness would thin out slightly and they were both alone in a ship that had been wrecked as a storm poured down on them. In his dream, Kaz and you were trying to find a way out of the ship wreck but out of the blue, a shadowy figure shoots at Kaz but the bullet never reaches Kaz. Kaz wonders why he is unharmed as he realizes that in the cold of the stormy night, you had wrapped yourself around him and taken the bullet for him. Kaz watches you bleed as the life drained away from your eyes and the storm drowns you and he loses you. 

He hates this feeling of helplessness and fear he feels when he wakes up and realizes it isn’t real, it was just a nightmare but it hurts more when it hits him that you aren’t around to quiet his fears with the gentleness in your eyes and the touch of your hand. 

Since you left Ketterdam, the days dragged on and time seemed to pass by completely slowly infuriating Kaz who was haunted by you and took out his anger on everyone else. Everyone in Ketterdam feared him more than ever, and the Crows were praying for your swift return. 

Kaz remembered the first time he had seen you. It was a moment he would never forget. 

The cold season was oncoming and the Crows had heard of stories of the number of children increased in Ketterdam who were shivering in the cold, starving and had no shelter. As they made their way to the Slat that provided them warmth as they talked and laughed, Jesper’s eyes had landed on a girl dressed in a shabby and raggedy dress standing on the dirty and wet street with baskets in her arms as she stared at him hungrily. 

Jesper was used to people staring at him. Everyone stared at him in admiration, fear, awe and lust and Jesper loved it. But Jesper had never felt anyone stare at him hungrily with a wistful look. It made him feel sad as he met your hungry and starved eyes that stared at him greedily and thought that you were one of those poor beggar children who had nothing to eat and no one to go to. It never occurred to him that you had been staring at him hungrily because you were greedy and starving for the warm and happy life he led with his friends, the laughter and mischievousness that glittered in his kind eyes and that you just wanted to go back to the better days where you had your brother by your side, and everything was just perfect and unspoiled. Jesper only saw your ragged clothes, hungry eyes, skinny figure that shivered in the cold. 

And that’s why Jesper thrust his hand into his pocket and took the money he had been meaning to gamble and took off his coat as well as he walked toward you with kindness “Here you go, dear. Take this money and my coat. It’ll keep you warm.”

You had been startled and alarmed as you realized the boy with a warm and sunny disposition you had been staring at had mistaken you for a beggar girl and you realized you looked like one of the shabby and skinny poor children, the ones you had always been generous to back at home. The realization hit you like a hurricane with humiliation as you grew red and then deathly white in embarrassment as you thought of how far you had fallen down from grace. 

And that’s why you broke into a laugh because you were close to crying as you exclaimed your heart touched at the boy’s kindness because all your time spent in Ketterdam, kindness had been very rare to you “Oh no! Oh no, thank you! I must refuse!”

The Crows who had been watching the scene unfold, waiting for Jesper patiently looked in intrigue and interest at you. Kaz raised his head to truly look at you because it was your voice that had interested all of them especially him as he took a few steps forward to listen to you. You did not speak in a manner of an ordinary street child but your manners belonged to a girl who was well bred and raised in a good household. A manner of a princess, mused Kaz as he looked at you intently. 

But Jesper was not to be moved away as he placed his coat over you and put the money in the palm of your hand with kindness etched on his face “You mustn’t refuse! Don’t worry, I have plenty of coats and trust me, this one will keep you really warm. And you must use this money to buy food. If there’s anything you need from me, just ask for Jesper at the Crow Club.”

You saw something so kind and generous in his face that you knew to refuse would break his heart and you didn’t want to disappoint him. So you tightened the very warm coat around you and gratefully accepted the kruge from Jesper who grinned happily though your pride felt stung and your cheeks burned bitterly. You had known that you looked weary and shabby but until now you didn’t know you looked like a beggar girl. 

His grin reminded you so much of your brother and his kindness was such a beautiful thing that you choked on a sob of humiliation and pain, reminiscence and happiness as you flung your arms around him “Thank you! Thank you so much! You are such a kind, sweet and generous darling boy!”

And with those words, you let go of Jesper who smiled happily and you left feeling warm. Kaz’ eyes widened at your response as Jesper skipped back towards them with a happy grin and Kaz reprimanded Jesper “Jesper! Why did you do that? That girl is not a beggar! She didn’t speak like a beggar or look like a beggar!”

“And she didn’t beg. I thought she would be angry with you. Sometimes, it makes people angry to be taken for beggars when they are not.” said Inej who felt sympathetic for you but she agreed with Kaz because there had been something very different about her. 

“She wasn’t angry.” replied Jesper dismayed at his friends reactions but firm in what he had done and happy because he had made a difference in your life as he smiled widely “She was very happy. She laughed and hugged me and said I was a kind, sweet and generous darling boy! And I was!”

Kaz and Inej exchanged thoughtful glances as Kaz felt mystified by you and said “An ordinary beggar girl would have never said that. They would have just accepted the money and thanked you quickly or even respectfully bobbed a curtesy.”

From that moment on, Kaz Brekker was profoundly interested in you. Not just Kaz Brekker but the Crows and nearly all of the Dregs. You knew nothing of this new interest in you and never appeared at the Crow Club seeking Jesper Fahey but whenever you passed the Slat in your broken shoes and worn out clothes, your hair tucked with a ribbon, faces would appear at the window to take a good look at you, many discussions concerning you were held and you were nicknamed at the girl who is not a beggar. It was hilarious when the Dregs said it in a hurry. 

Inej who had followed you and found information about you, told Kaz and Jesper about you “She is alone in Ketterdam. She doesn’t have anybody - she’s an orphan. She’s kind of a servant at the Van Eck mansion. She runs errands, carries parcels and does anything they tell her to.”

Inej’s anger was evident as she spoke fiercely, her hands clenched “They work her to the bone - sending her on long and tiresome errands without any proper clothing. And they punish her, hit her and deprive her of food and starve her and she doesn’t even have a proper place to sleep.”

Jesper looked like he was one second away from marching to the Van Eck mansion and getting you out of there but Inej wasn’t done as she continued “But she’s really strong. She’s friends with a crow that comes to her window and a rat in her room that she tamed.”

Jesper started laughing in amusement and wonder as his eyes gleamed in fondness “Oh! She’s odd that one but I believe I am beginning to like her!”

Kaz hid the little smile that threatened to burst at the thought of you taming and being friends with animals as he listened to Inej “And as for people who are nice to her... the Van Eck boy and her are friends. He’s the only one who is nice to her in that house.”

“What? You mean, Van Eck’s son is friends with the girl who isn’t a beggar?” asked Jesper in interest and intrigue as he snorted in amusement while Kaz sat up in interest “What? Does his daddy know?”

“No. The visits are secret and very rare. The Van Eck boy comes to her room at night whenever it’s safe, with food and books. And she reads to him and tells him stories and they talk and pretend that the attic she lives in is somewhere nicer. But she’s not a beggar.”

Kaz listened to this in rapt attention as he thought of you braving your unbearable life with a vivid imagination and determination. Perhaps that’s when Kaz had begun to like her unbeknownst to him.

The next time Kaz saw you was when he was on his way to the Slat after a negotiation and he spotted your dark mane of hair tied with a narrow ribbon as you slipped through the crowd and something in him ignited fiercely as he followed you quietly in interest. This day was a wretched one. His leg ached bitterly but he followed you nevertheless as he observed you were dressed in a dark blue dress that had grown shabbier and worn out, your shoes were downtrodden and wet with water that filled it, the coat around your shoulders was Jesper’s, your face pinched and starved and cold with blue and your heavy thick mane of dark hair was tied in a narrow ribbon. 

That day was wretchedly freezing and dreary, the street wet and sloppy and Kaz observed how the wind tried to drag the coat Jesper had given you as you waded through the mud, the water filling your broken shoes. Although Kaz knew of your position in the Van Eck household, he truly did not know the extent to which the ill tempered and depressed staff treated you as a slave driving you on errands on the worst days. Kaz didn’t know that today of all days, you were trying to keep away the thoughts of your ravenous hunger by thinking of more pleasant and lovelier thoughts of being in dry and beautiful clothes, eating the most delicious food in the company of those whom you loved the best. He did not know for you, your imagination and making up stories and pretending was your way of coping and being strong in the hell of this city. 

Kaz observed you stop at a bakery as you stared hungrily at the pastries, buns and cakes on display when your attention seemed to shift to a little beggar boy with untamable wild curly hair, a pale face with big hungry eyes and dirty clothes as he wrapped himself with rags to keep warm from the freezing cold. The boy was younger than Kaz himself and Kaz observed you talk softly and kindly to the boy for a few moments, your lips nearly blue from the cold. Kaz waited in the shadows as he saw you finish the conversation with the little hungry boy and look at him with an odd look in your eyes. 

Kaz watched keenly as you entered the bakery where you were greeted by a friendly and kind boy with unruly brown hair and watched you point for three waffles. The nice and warm ones that had just been made. Kaz quietly watched the baker boy throw in five waffles in the bag for you and you seemed to point his mistake to Kaz’ surprise. Kaz wondered why you wouldn’t just take it and leave when you were so hungry. But the baker boy just smiled kindly and gave the bag to you as you stumbled out of the bakery and look at the little boy who seemed to be crying in suffering and starvation. 

Kaz urged you to leave. You had what you wanted, there was no time for you to think about others. 

But to his great shock, you knelt down before the boy as you gently smiled at him and handed him one waffle. The boy looked at you in amazement as if you had performed a miracle and began to eat it up wildly as if he was afraid that the waffle would vanish any time if he didn’t devour it up soon. Kaz was frozen in shock as he watched you place the rest of the waffles in the little beggar boy’s hands as you said something kind to the boy and ruffled his hair. The savage beggar boy was too hungry to give thanks as you left him to eat knowing that he was starving and the beggar boy looked up to see the vanishing figure of you at the end of the street. 

Kaz didn’t know why but he knew that you could have eaten up all five waffles without hesitation. He had seen it in your eyes. And yet, you had sacrificed it for this poor child you barely knew. As he reflected on his thoughts, curiosity got the better of him as he strode toward the boy. 

“Who gave you those waffles?”

The boy nodded toward your vanishing figure and Kaz queried curiously “What did she say to you?”

The boy looked at Kaz distrustfully but answered “Asked me if I was ‘ungry.”

“What did you say?”

“Said I had nothin to eat.”

“And then she bought the waffles and gave it to you?”

The boy nodded and although Kaz knew the answer, he had to hear it from the boy’s mouth “How many?”

“Five.”

Something in Kaz’ seemed to ignite at the answer. He had seen it was five but he couldn’t quite believe that the girl would be so stupid, self - sacrificing and kind to give the food she could have sustained herself with to a complete stranger who she didn’t know. It was absolutely an act of stupidity to Kaz and yet it moved and touched Kaz in a way it had not before. Ketterdam was a city known for cruelty and exploitation with darkness of the hearts spreading through it like a disease but this girl had proven that her heart was a ray of sunshine, the kindness and goodness in her soul was still not snatched by this city even though she faced the worst trials of adversity. 

Kaz felt himself transported to his childhood where Jordie and him were completely poor and hungry. How different would their lives have been if there had been someone like her, someone who had been willing to share and listen to their woes and someone who had been completely good and kind to them without expectations and conditions. 

Kaz thought of your hungry eyes and cold figure. He knew you had wanted those waffles. He knew that you could have eaten all of those waffles and even more but instead you chose to give it to a little boy who was hungrier and colder than you were. 

Perhaps your act of goodness stirred something in his cold heart because Kaz inquired “Are you still hungry?”

“I’m always ‘ungry. But it ain’t half that bad now.”

Kaz was inspired by your little act of goodness that was enormous in his eyes as the next few words slipped his mouth “Go to the Crow Club and tell them Kaz Brekker sent you to be looked after by Inej Ghafa. She’ll help you get yourself warm and give you something to eat.”

The little urchin got up and obeyed because he didn’t care what was happening or what happened next as long as he was given a place where warmth and food was supplied. As Kaz looked at the little urchin leaving, he realized that he had done this for your sake and he decided to follow you because now he had started to see you, he couldn’t stop. 

Kaz found himself at the Van Eck household where he saw you entering it with baskets and parcels in your hands, completely exhausted. 

Kaz hid among the bushes having a good vantage point to see everything going on as he saw Van Eck accompanied by his son, both of them dressed in warm clothing as they sat at a table full of warm food with books scattered on it as Van Eck who was in a foul temper scolded the quiet son. 

When you entered the garden, you ran into Van Eck who was already in a savage temper as he snapped “Where were you? You have been wasting time, lingering out and about for hours.”

Kaz noticed how tired you looked but you still managed to reply faintly and politely “It was wet and muddy. It was hard to walk because my shoes were so bad and slippery.”

“Do not lie. You shall go without dinner tonight.” stated Van Eck savagely while his son turned quite pale. 

“I have had nothing to eat since this week.” Kaz heard you reply in a faint and low voice and felt himself tremble in savage anger. 

“Then all the better! You shall have no breakfast, lunch or dinner tomorrow either! That will teach you how to behave like a proper servant!” 

Kaz was certain you were trembling in hunger and cold as you grew pale and on the verge of breaking down when the son spoke up softly yet boldly “Father, please! She’s just a girl. You cannot starve -”

Van Eck slapped his son so hard that the boy nearly stumbled back and you gasped in horror and fear while Kaz watched in curiosity “You will speak when you are spoken to! Have you no pride? She is not a girl, she is a servant and she will be treated as so! Truly, Wylan, you disappoint me with that soft heart of yours. Go to your room and think about yourself. Have you never thought of what I think of you and try to become someone that I can be proud of?”

Wylan’s eyes were misty but it was your face that caught Van Eck’s attention. It had caught Kaz’ attention too for your face was serious and solemn, quiet and sad as you fixed your eyes on Van Eck who glared at you fiercely. 

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

Kaz’ eyes were on you as you stood steadfast and fearless in front of Van Eck as you answered quietly “I was thinking.”

By the expression on Van Eck’s face, Kaz realized that he had dealt with situations like this with you before as he demanded “Thinking of what? Beg my pardon for thinking.”

“I shall not beg your pardon for thinking.” you replied honestly as Kaz’ looked at you, your expression serious and sad as you replied quietly “I was thinking of what my father would think and do if he knew where I was today.”

Kaz’ saw Van Eck go red and then a dangerous purple as he flew at you and shook you violently, slapping your cheek and boxing your ears as you gasped in pain from the endless blows you received as Van Eck ignored Wylan’s protests as he snapped “You insolent child! How dare you be so impolite to your employer!”

There was a fire of fury that ignited in Kaz as he watched you take the blows in agony and pain as you hid back your tears. When Van Eck was finished with you, your cheeks were red and smarting and there was a slight wound from the blows you received but Kaz’ felt curious and awed as he saw your eyes were bright as stars as you let out a little amused laugh that shocked Van Eck who saw that you were not frightened by him. 

Kaz felt curiosity stir as he watched you in amazement as you laughed and then bobbed a mocking curtesy “Excuse me for laughing if it is impolite but I cannot help it when there is a clown in front of me.”

Kaz couldn’t help but grin at her daring sassiness as she ran away leaving Van Eck struggling with his rage and Wylan hiding a small smile as his eyes lingered on her vanishing figure. 

That day, as Kaz sat in his office in the Slat, he thought of your tight and pinched face, your starved and hungry eyes that held determination and thoughtfulness in them and your quiet polite manners and daring bravery. Kaz was fascinated by you from the moment he had seen you. You reminded him of a girl in his childhood. You were vastly different from this girl but yet there was something about you that reminded him of the girl back in his village Lij. 

Everyone called her the Little Empress. She was the daughter of a rich and respected man who was a businessman in Ketterdam. Her father kept her in the grand mansion and there were many stories and rumors about her and her dangerous father that Jordie used to tell Kaz to pass the time because Kaz was fascinated by the fairytale life they lived. Kaz remembers the times he did catch rare glimpses of her and believed that the name Little Empress fitted her. 

Kaz had seen her traveling in a carriage with her father as she held onto his arm. Kaz had seen her hand in hand with her father, surrounded by elegant governesses and intimidating men and women as they walked through the village commanding respect. Kaz’ eyes widened in awe and wonder every time he glimpsed her, for she looked very pretty and beautiful in her velvet dresses trimmed with furs, lace and satin dresses with puffed sleeves, lovely hats, ermine coats and muffs and tiny gloves that fitted her little hands, handkerchiefs and silk stockings that Kaz heard the villagers whisper that the little girl had a wardrobe that was much too grand for a child of seven. Kaz had learned the father was a gangster from his father but fond of his little girl and wanted his child to have everything he admired and everything he admired himself. Jordie murmured that though she had everything, the little girl was not spoiled because once Jordie had bumped into her on an errand and when she had seen Jordie cold and shivering, she had offered her silk scarf and her cloak and insisted on buying him a hot meal and food for his family as well. Kaz had never spoken to the Little Empress but all he knew of her is that she lived grandly with a gangster father who spoiled her, governesses who taught her everything she needed to know and people who protected her. 

Though Kaz barely remembers much of his life in his village, one of the memories he does remember is meeting the gangster, the father of the Little Empress who visited their farm to buy a horse for his daughter. Kaz’ father knew the gangster through casual acquaintance for both men had fondness and affection for horses and greeted the gangster excited about finding a horse for his daughter. They both walked around as Kaz’ father talked about the special qualities of each horse but the gangster was waiting for the right horse. 

Kaz and Jordie left their village after their father’s death and a week after that, they heard that the gangster’s house was burned to ashes with everyone in it and there was no possibility of any survivors. Kaz had thought of the Little Empress burning in the fire and had felt a pit of sadness grow at the thought of the gangster and the pretty Little Empress dying in the fire. Their faces were now blurry to him but he still remembered the excitement and amazement he felt every time he caught a glimpse of her. 

You were not like the Little Empress at all. You were dirty, shabby, poor and worn out. But there was something in your manner that reminded him of the Little Empress. Something bold and kind, smart and resilient that impressed Kaz who was lost in thoughts of you. 

Kaz kept an eye out for you but after a while, you stopped passing by the Slat and Crow Club with parcels and baskets in your arms. Kaz waited for you to pass by the Slat and Crow Club but as days went by, your presence did not grace them and the Dregs felt worried about the girl who was not a beggar. Kaz hid all the worry as he sent Inej to look out for you but you had disappeared from Ketterdam. Kaz felt something in him sink in dark pain when Inej bought back the news that she couldn’t find you anywhere as he realized that you had not survived the cruelty and mercilessness of Ketterdam. After your disappearance, the Van Eck boy mysteriously disappeared as well. Though Kaz, Inej and Jesper searched valiantly for you, their efforts were in vain because you were nowhere to be found and no one knew of where you were. 

After many months after your disappearance, Kaz Brekker who was working on a heist regarding taking down one of the prominent gangs that abducted young children heard stories and rumors of an infamous spy and an intelligent detective who could find anyone no matter how far they ran and how hard they tried to hide away from the rest of the world. This spy was a shadow, an enigma and a mystery that had no name but many people in Ketterdam owed their lives to this spy because this spy would take any job given to them and do it successfully with style. This was a unique spy different from the ones who dominated Ketterdam. This spy took on cases of murder, missing children, abusive households, exposing corruption and helped people with their skillset. The stories and rumors boasted of a spy who was dangerous, uncatchable, intelligent and always one step ahead of those who thought they had the spy in a trap. 

Kaz searched for this ruthless and smart spy endlessly because it was rumored they were working on the same case as him and secondly their skillset could be valuable to him. Finally, you got into a fight with one of the Dregs leaving him seriously injured. Kaz who had seen the injuries on his Dreg decided to find you once and for all as he send Inej, Jesper and Nina to inquire and found out that you occasionally hung out at a particular pub where people knew your identity but protected you. He learned that you went by name Pandora Silvertongue in the profession.   

Kaz remembered stepping into the bar that belonged to the boy with unruly hair that had been kind to you that day. The boy had now upgraded his bar to a dining and drinking pub where the patrons were drinking and eating, laughing and singing like strangled cats while the boy smiled as he poured them more drinks. 

When the boy with unruly hair saw Kaz, Inej and Jesper enter, his eyes widened in recognition and fear and Kaz announced in a steely voice that was not to be challenged “Is there anyone named Pandora Silvertongue?” 

Everyone was quiet in fear and fright as no one dared to breath and Jesper took one of his revolvers and shot it to the air startling the patrons who screamed in fear as Kaz announced once again with authority “I said is there anyone named Pandora Silvertongue?”

The private room of the bar opened up as a girl with a spring in her step, color in her cheeks stepped out calmly as her eyes glinted with understanding and fearlessness. Kaz’, Inej’ and Jesper’s  eyes widened in shock and amazement as they recognized you, the girl who was not a beggar who they had thought disappeared from Ketterdam but here you were alive and well. 

Kaz could feel his breath quicken as his eyes never left you who was dressed in a fine dark blue dress as you looked at the Crows and then at the bartender with authority that you commanded naturally “Steve, get them a drink. Everyone else go home.”

Everyone obeyed your command as they immediately stumbled out of the bar. You seated yourself at a table carelessly and elegantly without extending an invitation to the Crows to join you because you showed no signs of fearing them while Steve poured fine whisky for all of them as you had ordered. 

When Steve finished pouring the drinks, you looked at the bartender with a quiet gleam in your eyes “You go home.”

“But -”

“I said go home.” you said in a calm and quiet voice but everyone understood you shouldn’t be challenged as Steve cast a good protective and concerned look at you and scuttled to the back. 

You lit a cigarette airily and carelessly as you looked at Kaz Brekker as if he was nothing special who was still recovering from his shock and Jesper broke the silence with a grin “The girl who is not a beggar! It’s you! We were so worried about you! We thought you had died - or disappeared but you look so awesome!”

You smiled slightly but before you could reply, Kaz spoke sharply in a hard tone “So I suppose you are the infamous Pandora Silvertongue because you are looking up and down at me like you aren’t afraid of me.”

You merely smiled as you replied calmly and quietly taking a puff of your cigarette “I want to know what you want, Mr. Brekker.”

But before Kaz could say anything, Jesper jumped in “We’re so glad you are alright. We were worried about you, you know? I mean, we used to make up stories and theories about who you were. You probably don’t remember me -”

“Jesper Fahey from the Crow Club.” you said with a genuine smile as you nodded at him “I never forget anyone who has been kind to me. Thank you for being warm and kind on one of the many dark days I had.”

“Oh... it was nothing.”

“No, it was something. It was something extraordinary.” you replied with a genuinely warm and grateful smile as Jesper felt appreciated and happy. 

“I want to know what you want, Mr. Brekker.” you replied calmly and quietly as you took a puff of your cigarette. “What are you doing here?”

“Your name is Pandora Silvertongue. In the past few months, you have earned a reputation for being a dangerous spy and an intelligent detective who no one can hide anything from. You also tutor Ketterdam students. You’ve made yourself more enemies than friends. You’re in danger.” informed Kaz calmly with a deadpanned expression as he gazed at you skeptically and perceptively. 

“You’ve done your research but you are still not answering my question.” you replied in amusement as you dabbed your cigarette into the ashtray 

Kaz saw you raise your eyebrows at him and intrigue spark in your eyes as he began “A few weeks ago, someone started to capture Dregs. Not just any Dregs, female Dregs were targeted, lured into isolated areas, tortured and killed. Their eyes were gouged and hearts were ripped out and after three murders, a note was left at the fourth murder.”

You listened to Kaz who handed you the information on the murders as you looked through the papers “This is all the information we have on the killer. We’ve tried to follow and keep tabs on each Dreg but there is little progress. We need to know who the killer is so we can take him down.”

“I need to examine the bodies of the victims and visit the location of each murder to determine the behavioral patterns of the victims and murderers, preferably with one of you so I can role play and get inside their minds.” you replied thoughtfully as you flipped through each page quickly while Kaz nodded “Was the murder weapon left at the scene?”

“No. Who would be stupid enough to do that?” laughed Jesper rolling his eyes at you. 

“Killers who enjoy the thrill of the chase. To them, killing isn’t just a crime, it’s an emotional release and enjoyment.” you replied as you ran your hand through your hair, your face full of concentration and focus making you oddly attractive to Kaz “Was anything taken away from the victims when they were found?”

“Their weapons.” answered Kaz curtly 

“Well, I’ll look into everything about these girls. From their family backgrounds, traumas, how they were recruited, special skills, who they were close to and their daily routines. I also look into their autopsy reports.” you stated firmly as you closed the file and looked at an unreadable Kaz, a hopeful Inej and amazed Jesper who listened attentively to you and you were silent for a few moments as you read the note “But I can tell you this about the killer from the note.”

Kaz leaned slightly forward in interest as he waited in anticipation “Did you ever wonder why there was a note left on the fourth murder? It’s because the first three killings didn’t get the attention he wanted it to. So, to get the glory and revel in it, the killer left the note. What he doesn’t know is... he also left clues as to how to find him.”

Kaz raised his eyebrows because he couldn’t quite believe you had found clues regarding the killer so soon but he nodded at you to continue. 

“From what you told me about the killer, he is not confident enough to initiate social contact so he lures them into isolation. Look at the letters, the style of writing - not confident enough but charming enough to be trustworthy. Emotional indicators are analyzed through slants. The writer’s handwriting shows signs of emotional repression and violence. And the pressure if you look closely is excessively heavy which shows that he is uptight hiding trauma and can easily overreact with excessive violence.” you stated in one breath as you gestured to the handwriting in the letter while Kaz looked at you in hidden wonder and admiration, impressed by your intelligence. 

Jesper was the first one to find his tongue “You got all that from his handwriting?”

“Handwriting is an indicator of personality and behavior. It symbolizes your emotions at the given time just like your facial expressions parallel the way you are feeling and speaking.” you replied smartly while Kaz processed this new information “But the interesting thing about this note is - it’s a line from a Kaelish poem. It says ‘Mirror mirror on the wall, tell no more lies about who you are.’”

Inej looked at Kaz and Jesper and then at you thoughtfully as she offered “So then, we are looking for someone Kaelish, well versed in literature, educated, narcistic and organized?”

You looked at Kaz confidently and smartly, with a grim glint in your eyes “I would cut off Kaelish. This person wants you to narrow it down to Kaelish people. Right now, you are looking for someone who knows the language of Kaelish, who is well - versed in literature, violent when provoked, smart and organized and charming and trustworthy and someone who needs to be in control. This was a person all these three girls knew and trusted... and maybe, it’s someone you know too. Someone who knows the procedures of the Dregs and how things work in there. This was someone who stalked each girl, observed the times she did everything, places she went to, people she talked to and organized the crime accordingly.” 

“So we cannot eliminate the possibility that it might be one of the Dregs.” replied Kaz calmly as he thought of the possible suspects and the people who the three girls had in common. 

“No. In fact, I believe you might have even met the killer, perhaps offering condolences for the deaths of the girls or trying to help in any way they can to find them. Keep a sharp eye and trust no one.” you replied sharply and grimly and then after a long moment of silence, your lips curved into a smile “How do you feel about the violin?”

Kaz, Jesper and Inej exchanged surprised glances because that was the last question they expected “What?”

“Well, I play the violin when I’m thinking. Will that be a problem? I also need a large space to pace about, I’m a coffee addict and I don’t talk for days on end and sometimes I talk to myself because I’m the only one in the room who makes sense. Will that bother you? Potential colleagues should know the worst about each other.” you stated easily and calmly with a charming and sweet smile as you finished the last of your whisky. 

Jesper and Inej exchanged amused glances at how Kaz looked surprised at you taking charge and twisting the conversation to surprise him as he replied “Colleagues? Who said anything about becoming a Dreg?”

“I did. Told Nina Zenik day before yesterday over waffles that I must be a difficult and dangerous woman to work with because Pekka Rollins’ has his eye on me because I just took down one of the slavers. Now here her employer is... Kaz Brekker, the Lieutenant of the Dregs, the owner of the Crow Club, clearly wanting to get to me before Rollins does by testing me to see if I am worthy of his time and investment and lives up to Zenik’s word.” you said casually and nonchalantly as if the answer had been simple enough for anyone to understand and Kaz wondered if you had set this up on purpose as he watched you stand up and put your coat on “It isn’t really a difficult conclusion.”

Jesper grinned “I really like her.”

Inej grinned wider as she nodded “Yeah, I really like her too.”

“I’ll be in contact. I need to establish my investigation so I’ll be moving in as a bar girl and Brekker’s secretary tomorrow. That way, I can discreetly find out about what happened to the girls and who they associated with and perhaps even lure out the killer.” you replied briskly in a composed and matter - of - fact voice that Kaz did not like because he was the boss as you moved across the room swiftly “I don’t need a room, I have my own place so I won’t be around for that. I’ll meet you in the evening around at five to go check the victims and locations. Sorry, got to dash... have important things to do.”

Kaz was surprised at the nonchalance and fearlessness you held toward him and the way you treated him as your equal as he called out “Is that it?”

“Is that what?” you inquired politely as you stopped mid - step to look at Kaz in curiosity. 

“Well, we just met and now you are part of the Dregs without my permission?” replied Kaz smartly in a deadly and dangerous voice as he looked at you coldly while Inej and Jesper exchanged amused looks because Kaz seemed to have met his match.  

You didn’t seem fazed at all, in fact you seemed surprised and amused “Problem?”

“We don’t know a thing about each other. I don’t know where we are meeting this evening and I suspect Pandora Silvertongue isn’t your real name.” replied Kaz smoothly and smartly as he raised his eyebrows at her with a smirk because he had to admit she had the nerve and daring combined with her intelligence and curiosity which felt oddly attractive to Kaz. 

“I know you are the Lieutenant of the Dregs, Kaz Brekker. I know you sent the Wraith to follow me yesterday. I know that Per Haskell is a puppet and you are the puppet master who one day hopes to be the leader of the Dregs but is waiting for the opportune moment. I know that you are an orphaned farm boy who was raised outside of Ketterdam in a village judging by the hint of the rural accent that is audible under your Kerch. I know you came to Ketterdam with someone you loved dearly -  the last of your family members - perhaps an older sibling. Since you are standing here alone, I know that your older sibling must have died in the firepox plague that overwhelmed Ketterdam but somehow you managed to survive and climb up the ladder in the streets, developing an aversion to touch, trust issues, avoidance of friendships, hyper vigilance, protectiveness toward Jesper who possibly reminds of your sibling by the way you look at him and reprimand him and hunger for revenge. You think the world is out to get you and you are distrustful of every single person you come into contact with because you were let down by someone you cared about. You like to think you are detached from weakness but you do care... and the reason I know that is you permanently marked yourself with that tattoo on your wrist... R... it stands for something personal... perhaps a name of someone you care about with love or hate... a reminder to you. I know that you like to pretend you are different from the rest of the criminals in the Barrel by dressing up in black like a mercher and distinguishing yourself away from them but the gloves - they hide something - perhaps your touch aversion? I know your limp is psychosomatic. And just one mention of Pekka Rollins, your face is filled with hatred but you are not competing with him for power - no, your eyes are filled with revenge. It’s personal and you intend to be the last man standing.” 

Kaz’ eyes widened as you began your explanation and analysis of him and he felt completely exposed and slightly frightened when you deducted and observed his weaknesses and shames that the world did not see because he hid it so well from them. Kaz couldn’t breath as he listened to you cleverly and calmly rattle out facts about him that no one else knew but seemed completely transparent and obvious to you and when you finished, Kaz’ knees were slightly wobbly and his grip on his cane was tight as he looked at you with something akin to fear and reverence in his heart. 

Inej and Jesper exchanged slightly anxious looks as they looked at Kaz who had gone completely pale and you grinned and winked at the three of them “That’s enough to be going on, don’t you think? The name’s Pandora Silvertongue until you’ve earned my real name and meet me in front of the Church of Ghezen!”

Kaz had been shaken to the core and had wondered how you knew about these personal things. The next time he had met you to help you with your investigate, he had been completely cold and threatening as he demanded how you found out his secrets but you simply explained your observations that had led you to conclude your deductions about him. Those observations were sharp and clever, things that the rest of the world were stupid enough to ignore and it had shocked Kaz you were clever and sharp enough to pick up on those little things. 

Though Kaz hadn’t liked how you had first approached him, he understood your value as a person and a member of the Dregs immediately. He knew that he could not let you go because there were a dozen more powerful and cruel men who were willing to get their hands on you and use you unkindly to their advantage. Kaz had enough information on the city to know that Pekka Rollins had a keen eye on your talents and wanted you all to himself. And Kaz was not going to let a dangerous and talented girl like you be Pekka’s property. 

“That’s enough to be going on, don’t you think? The name’s Pandora Silvertongue until you've earned my real name and meet me in front of the Church of Ghezen!”

You worked undercover as a bargirl and Kaz’ secretary for two weeks in the Crow Club and the Slat. Kaz noticed that you wasted no time in charming everyone and making friends with people who warmed up to you and opened their hearts, confiding their deepest and darkest secrets to you. You were an efficient and effective hard worker who never gave anyone reason to doubt that you were a spy as you observed and worked on the case. There were times you would drive Kaz crazy with your endless playing of the violin at midnight when you needed to think, your coffee addiction that was worse than his and you muttering under your breath, spouting completely random but interesting facts that surprised everyone out of nowhere and sometimes completely zoning out lost in thought ignoring his presence. Kaz found it truly annoying and exasperating but Inej, Nina and Jesper who were slightly patient with you found it amusing that Kaz had found someone worse than him. 

Through his time with you,  Kaz couldn’t believe you were real. Whenever you presented developments in the investigation, there were somethings such an elegant intelligence and raw thought that he had never seen in anyone else. He always would be surprised by your findings because you would up with observations that no one else would think of and was surprisingly accurate. Kaz never showed it but he was in awe of your intelligence and wondered where you had trained your mind to be like this and learned all these things. 

You had found the killer soon enough and suspected that Anika would be the next target. What you hadn’t expected the killer to do was twist his plan and take Inej hostage. Kaz and Jesper had set out to find the killer with the Dregs with your help and you were ordered to stay out of the line of fighting. But the killer had been too smart for Kaz and Jesper planning own traps for them forcing them to watch when he tried to torture Inej under the impression that Inej was Pandora Silvertongue. 

Jesper was full on panicking “PLEASE! LET HER GO! SHE’S NOT PANDORA SILVERTONGUE!”

The killer laughed as he looked at Jesper who was trying to break free “I don’t believe you.”

“You should you know. Pandora Silvertongue is nothing like her.” came a cocky and confident voice out of the dark shadows alarming everyone and getting the attention of the killer.

Inej let out a gasp, Jesper looked around in amazement and shock at your voice that had echoed out of the darkness and Kaz swore his heart jumped out of his chest in alarm and relief with overwhelming emotion that he could not describe. 

“How would you describe her, Mr. Brekker? Beautiful? Intelligent? Resourceful?” your voice asked from the distinct darkness as Kaz had tried to look around trying to search where you possibly might be hiding. 

Kaz had muttered “Disobedient.”

The killer who was one of the new Dregs grinned maniacally “Then you know what I want, don’t you, Silvertongue?”

You had answered as you had taken down one man through the darkness “I believe I do.”

The killer was maniacal at this point as he called out for you as he flashed his knife with a grin when you had appeared out of nowhere and hit the killer with a large brick on his head making the killer fall onto the floor in an unconscious heap as you had rolled your eyes at the killer “Moron.”

You had saved Inej, Jesper and Kaz in time much to their relief. Kaz had seen enough proof that you were worthy of being in the Dregs and offered you a position of the spy in part of the Dregs. You had accepted and from then on, the Crow Club and the Slat had become your home. You had become a loyal ally, a talented spy who was excellent at your job and a close friend to Kaz. Soon Kaz trusted you with the most important missions that you completed brilliantly, valued you as an important part of the Crows and began to see you as a close friend who he liked. 

Kaz prided himself on being someone who had a control over his emotions. After all, he was the most feared man in Ketterdam and his stoic and cold nature required a certain level of control. But when Kaz was with you, he felt something warm flood within him whenever you smiled at him reassuringly and teasingly, he found himself becoming a boy who craved to feel the flutter of his heart whenever you laughed at his dark and dry sense of humor, the reassurance he felt when you stayed up late with him planning heists and cleaning messes after parties. He found his eyes searching for you in the crowded Crow Club and lingering on you for a moment too long as he gazed at your charming and charismatic demeanor that enchanted him. He found your company enjoyable as both of you walked the streets of Ketterdam from the harbor to the marketplace to the Slat and you chatted enthusiastically about anything on your mind as he found himself listening in fondness as he memorized the expressions of your face. He looked forward to the nights where both of you would sit on the roof together gazing at the view of Ketterdam and looking up at the stars as you both shared bottles of whisky and laughed and confided your insecurities, wildest dreams, deepest secrets and untold thoughts to each other as he felt a connection of understanding and trust he had never felt with anyone else. 

Kaz remembered when one day Jesper had dragged him to one of his games where they had to disguise themselves and fool as many Dregs as possible. Kaz and you had been friendly competitive rivals as Kaz promised to beat you in the game. But he had been destroyed when he had only managed to fool two Dregs and you had managed to fool around ten Dregs with your disguise and cover story. 

Kaz walked toward you who was drinking as he scowled “I blew it. I only got through two Dregs.”

“Woah! I got to ten.” you had replied with a playful and sympathetic grin as you looked at him. 

“I can’t believe I lost this stupid game! I was so excited for this. What happened?” exclaimed Kaz as he sat next to you wearing a scowl as he looked completely frustrated. 

“Well, maybe you being excited is what happened. Like every time we’re planning heists, you’re always super intelligent, you take your time, you stay calm and examine every possibility. But every time we do dumb games like this, you get excited and act like a crazy idiot. My advice... don’t act like a crazy idiot.” you replied with an insightful and thoughtful smile as you looked at Kaz with a soft glimmer in your eyes.  

Kaz was surprised at your answer that made him think because it made sense at how perceptive and true it was “Thanks. That was surprisingly wise.”

“Yeah well, motherhood really opens a woman’s eyes. I finally feel as if I’m finally part of something bigger than myself.” you had dramatically said as you touched your fake pregnant belly that was part of your disguise in the game while Kaz rolled his eyes at you and slapped the fake belly in exasperation. 

You placed a protective hand on your fake belly as you gasped dramatically “Hey don’t you dare touch Kazper Jr! That’s right! It’s your baby!”

Kaz had to stop himself from laughing outright as he played along “Are you saying I knocked you up?”

“You sure did!”

Kaz liked it when you were with him. With the rest of the world, he knew you were a gold rush. Everybody wanted to have a taste of you and wanted to know what it would be like to love you. Kaz couldn’t keep his eyes off you because you were an inviting temptation as you flirted and talked with the people with such charismatic and charming sweetness that he felt a flicker of twisted jealousy that crushed him. But when you were with Kaz, though you still teased him with that charming twinkle in your eyes, you displayed a soft sense of vulnerability you never showed to the rest of the world. There was a softness and sweet sincerity in you that you gave Kaz that you never showed the rest of the world and before he could stop himself, Kaz had opened himself and showed his deepest and darkest parts baring himself vulnerable and you had accepted and loved him unconditionally. 

Kaz knew he felt something special for you, something that he never felt for anyone else and something that he couldn’t afford to feel for you in this world. In this world, sentiment was the greatest weakness and it would be used against him by the countless number of enemies who he had made on his way to greatness. So he tried to keep a distance from you as much as he could but there were times he was just drawn to you and he couldn’t stop himself from indulging in your company and worrying about you. 

Before the Ice Court, Kaz had promised Nina that he’d keep an eye on Matthias. So as he searched for Dregs who could infiltrate Hellgate, befriend Matthias and protect him, you had volunteered eagerly. But Kaz had turned down your suggestion feeling something akin to terror of losing you to the darkness and cruelty of Hellgate but when he realized that there was no one else he could truly trust and that you were not backing down from this assignment, he had reluctantly sent you into Hellgate to spy on Matthias. Your absence had been absolutely maddening as the Slat felt cold and empty without you and he worried about your wellbeing in Hellgate. When the chance to break into the Ice Court had arrived, he had seized the opportunity to break you out along with Matthias. 

Kaz remembered when he had reunited with you after your year in Hellgate. You looked completely different, grown up as if you had lived through darkness and survived to tell the tale. But the kind twinkle in your pained eyes was still there as Kaz finally caught up with you and found himself smiling genuinely in relief as he had said “Can I get a free woman a drink?”

The grin you had given him reassured his heavy heart that despite the pain you had endured, you were still completely in sync with him as you said the words he had wanted to say “I missed you, Kaz Brekker.”

You had been by his side through the Ice Court Heist and watched him take down Pekka Rollins as he enjoyed his vengeance on the man who had destroyed his life.

Kaz remembered the aftermath of celebrations when they had overthrown Pekka Rollins and taken Ketterdam to themselves. He had stood with bruises that didn’t seem to hurt but felt victorious and triumphant as he heard Nina, Inej, Wylan, Matthias and you celebrate with Jesper who announced loudly to the Dregs.

“Alright everyone! Pekka Rollins is history, we are absolute legends and we can finally walk freely around Ketterdam!” exclaimed Jesper in an absolutely celebratory mood, feeling blissful as he looked at the Crows who were grinning madly “Who wants waffles?”

You had grinned at Jesper’s infectious mood but had approached Kaz who was staring out of the window at the view of Ketterdam as you looked at Kaz “Hey, you alright? You did it. You finally got your vengeance on Pekka Rollins. 

Kaz’ lips twitched into a small smile as relief and victory blossomed in his chest at his accomplishment and looked at you curiously because he knew if you didn’t have such faith and optimism, he couldn’t have done it “How do you do it Y/N? Keep hoping. Hope is dangerous and it clouds your judgement. And yet after everything you’ve gone through, after everything that happened, everything I did... how did you still manage to hope that it could all work out?”

You smiled gently as your eyes gleamed knowingly and sincerely as you looked at him softly “Because of you. You don’t realize it, Kaz... but you’re actually the most hopeful person I’ve ever met.”

Kaz’ eyes widened as his breath hitched at her unexpected words that he was completely taken aback by as he stared at you in disbelief and surprise seeing only the truth and kindness etched on your face as you said honestly “From the day you crawled out of that harbor having lost everything you ever loved, everyone assumed your place in the world was in the bottom as the weak and lonely, a boy who was defined by loss. But you wished for more. You dared to dream and hope as you worked to climb your way up and gain the power. You dared to hope to succeed in the craziest heists and became someone who everyone feared. You dared to hope to bring down the man who was responsible for your brother’s death.” 

Kaz felt breathless at how you saw him and you smiled at him brightly “Now it’s all over. You have your whole life ahead of you.”

Kaz’ lips curled into a soft smile as he looked at you hopefully “I guess in the end, there really is no end. Just new beginnings.” 

You had tended to his injuries patiently with tenderness and kindness he did not deserve. You had saved his life countless times from taking your first gunshot that was meant for him and committing your first murder as you killed a man in cold blood to protect him. 

You had stood by his side through every questionable decision and defended him when you disagreed with him. You had been loyal to him even when he had pushed you away and lashed out at you in a cruel manner. You weren’t afraid to pushing and telling him when he was wrong and cruel with the stubborn and fiery look in your eyes. You had seen his lawless demons and dangerous ghosts that haunted him but had understood him and helped him work through it. You had seen him as the darkest demon who was dangerous and cruel and yet loved the monster within him. You knew about how he struggled with touch from the very beginning but never questioned or mocked it but simply allowed Kaz to take it slow as he started it with simple fleeting brushing of shoulders to soft fingers interlocking with each other and holding hands to the feeling of being close to you without drowning in the waters. 

You were unlike any other woman he had ever met. 

Kaz sighed as he buried his head in his hands as he remembered when it all went wrong. He had an important mission that required him to retrieve information and steal a valuable documents from the vault hidden in a highly guarded mansion of one of the merchers in Ketterdam. The mercher had a reputation for throwing lavish parties to make connections and relationships so Kaz had decided to ask you to be his pretend wife so they could disguise themselves as guests and get into the vault. 

Kaz’s eyes had flickered toward you when you had entered into his office. He had pretended to be busy but the truth was you had a way of making him painfully aware of every breath you took and every smile you flashed as you brought a warm light into his cold life and he informed you of what he needed. You had grown completely silent and your smile had vanished slightly concerning Kaz who raised his eyebrows at you waiting for your answer.

“No.” you had replied curtly and crisply as you had looked away from Kaz. “Ask Inej or Nina. Or -”

“Y/N... I want you.” Kaz had replied softly as he had slipped out of his seat and stood in front of you “You and I work well together. We make a good team together. And you are the only one I trust for this.” 

His gloved fingers had brushed against yours as he looked deeply at you waiting for your answer and you had surprised him as you smiled at him warmly as red dust scattered on your cheeks and you replied “Ask me properly and I might say yes.”

Kaz had smiled genuinely as he watched you walk away. Later, you were working late into the night with him as both of you were looking through information on a mercher that Kaz wanted to rob. Both of you dug into boxes of information that you had found of books, letters, documents, and photographs of the mercher’s life. As Kaz and you sat side by side enjoying the comforting silence of the moment, and Kaz found a photograph of two lovers laughing on the porch of their old house. It felt hard to explain but in that photograph, he saw himself and you living that life.

You had looked over at him with a small smile as your eyes flickered at the photograph “They look very happy. They must have loved each other very much.”

Kaz looked at you and he felt time stand still as he couldn’t find the right words to describe how he felt in that moment with you as he felt breathless staring into your enchanting and warm eyes and finally broke the silence as he asked “Y/N, do you want to dance with me?”

You had blushed but your smile was answer enough as you had accepted his gloved hand. Kaz’ lips twitched into a smile as he felt your hand rest upon his gently and your other arm holding onto his shoulder gently as he ran his hand softly along your waist and placed it on the small of your back. His breath hitched as he looked at your tender and sweet eyes that twinkled brilliantly as both of you began to dance around the room to the slow and romantic music echoing from downstairs as the rain splattered outside. 

At first, Kaz hated that he was nervous and clumsy tripping over himself and stepping on your toes. He was the Bastard of the Barrel who had humiliated and overthrown Pekka Rollins and now ruled Ketterdam inspiring fear with intimidation and violence and yet he couldn’t properly dance with the girl he possibly liked. 

You had grinned brightly much to Kaz’ mortification at his mistakes as he stepped on your toes once again and you offered “Hey, do you want me to teach you how to do this so you don’t hurt me or possibly yourself?”

Kaz had flushed a bright red in mortification as he had nodded “Yes.”

“Hold your back straight. Now you will lead and I will follow. And now one, two, three...” you began softly with a tender and encouraging smile as you let Kaz guide you across the floor and much to his surprise as Kaz followed the gentle hum of your words, Kaz found himself dancing without causing you any grievous injuries. 

Kaz felt his breath hitch and his heart race as he danced with you smoothly and his eyes flickered down to ensure his feet were not going to hurt you when you instructed him gently “Look into my eyes. Dancing is seeing one another for who they really are, understanding and trusting each other. That’s why I love it.”

Kaz had looked into your eyes and had seen you who had always been there for him through thick and thin and had changed him in the most unimaginable ways as he murmured softly “I see you.”

You had sucked in a breath as your eyes had grown wide but you had smiled softly and joyfully “You dance incredibly.”

“All because I have a talented teacher.” replied Kaz smoothly with a soft smile as he spun you around as you chuckled. 

Kaz had never felt so light-hearted and happy as he spun you around and held you in his arms as both of danced perfectly together in harmony. Kaz knew it felt foolish to give in so easily to how he was feeling but in this moment, he didn’t care as light and humor danced in his eyes feeling weightless, all the burdens and worries he carried washed away as he held you in his arms as you glowed in happiness and laughter. 

Kaz felt free and weightless laughing in delight as you spun him around as you laughed in amusement, breaking rules of dancing but he didn’t care because he knew this moment with you was right and wanted this forever. He couldn’t let go of this perfect moment where the stars had aligned and everything felt just good to be true as Kaz spun you around and dipped you down, his hand supporting your back, stopping you from falling. You held onto his shoulder trusting him to hold you and never let you fall and break. Kaz pulled you up once as you held onto his gloved hand and his nose brushed against your forehead swaying to the soft and romantic song echoing through the Slat as both of you stayed like that for what seemed like an eternity. 

“Y/N...” murmured Kaz as his eyes fluttered open, memorizing every inch of your face and committing you to memory afraid you would vanish if he let you go “Will you marry me and make me the happiest man on earth?” 

Your heart rate escalated through the roof and your eyes had widened in surprise as you stared at him in speechless amazement as he took out a ring that had a crow with a R engraved on it as he held your hand tightly in his “Marry me, Y/N and be my partner in crime for life.”

Kaz saw you chuckle and smile at him as you nodded “Yes. I’ll be your partner in crime for life, Kaz Brekker.”

“Kaz Rietvald.” confessed Kaz softly, his voice barely a whisper as he looked at you vulnerably “Kaz Rietvald is my real name. The name of the boy who came to Ketterdam with hopes of making it with his brother. The name of the boy who died in the harbor that day.”

You had looked at him with understanding and sincerity as he swallowed a lump of emotion and confessed “But when I’m with you... I feel like Kaz Rietvald once again. The boy who believed in magic and beauty of the world.”

“Kaz...” you had murmured as you looked at the ring that held great meaning for you now and then at Kaz with so much you wanted to say to him but he shook his head as he placed a soft and fleeting kiss on your hand. 

“Y/N...” he whispered as he slipped the ring onto your hand with his own trembling hands and then placed a sweet and tender kiss on your forehead “You are the reason.”

The reason that he was alive. The reason that he still felt alive. The reason that he looked forward to waking up every day. The reason that he paid attention to all the magical little things you did. The reason he felt worry whenever you were hurt and wounded. The reason that he dared to dream once again. 

From there on, Kaz had felt connected to you in a way that he hadn’t before. He had wanted to practice perfecting the image of pretending to be an engaged couple so he encouraged both of you to do little things that couples do. But it was easy to forget that Kaz was pretending when he hid sincere love notes inside your room, replaced the wilting flowers in your room with your favorite flowers and left little gifts for you. It was easy for Kaz to forget that you were not his to lose when he found little notes filled with jokes and small affirmations inside his files, his favorite books annotated with your thoughts and sentences highlighted that reminded you of him, flowers pressed to the pages.

It was easy to get lost in the act of being your husband when he exchanged knowing and lingering glances with you in secret, whenever he would feel the twisted dark feeling of jealousy when he saw any man look at you in the wrong way, when you bought coffee made exactly how he liked it in the mornings and when he was working late. It was easy to forget that you weren’t his lover when both of you worked late until night, your head resting on his lap as he ran his hand through your hair smiling down at you as you read your books, when he listened to you play the violin, when he shared meals with you and cuddled with you relishing the comfortable silence and teasing each other and confiding his secrets in you.

It was easy to forget that you were not his wife when he had seen you laughing in amusement, your eyes gleaming brightly and his lips had met yours passionately and tenderly as time stood still and his heart beat violently out of his ribcage when you had kissed him back with equal tenderness and desire. It was easy to forget that this was all just an act when he would indulge in the pleasure of nipping your earlobe and placing a trail of kisses from your cheek to your neck and collarbone taking his time to taste you and feel your body tremble underneath his touch. 

It was easy to forget it all because you were easy to fall in love with deeply and madly until it was too late for him to back out. 

When the day came for the party, he had dressed up and you appeared in front of him making him speechless as his eyes widened because you were a breathtaking sight to behold. You were wearing an off the shoulder satin long emerald green dress that hugged your curves perfectly. You were wearing simple pearl earrings, your hair braided into loose waves and your cheeks pink and your lips ruby red as you smiled at Kaz. 

Kaz had placed his hand on the small of your back as he guided you away and whispered into your ear “You look beautiful.”

You had blushed when you felt his lips brush against the nape of your neck as you squeezed his hand gently “You don’t look so bad yourself”

At the party, everyone was full of admiration for Kaz and you as a couple. Kaz and you socialized with the crowd of aristocrats, merchers and businessmen as you charmed them with your signature charisma that got enough information for Kaz. Though Kaz was not much of a social creature, he observed you morphing into the form that you needed to take in order to charm and lure your target into giving you what you wanted. 

As the time drew near for them to rob the vault, Kaz and you were talking with a few ladies and gentlemen who were very impressed with the both of you, the affectionate and loving couple and one woman had asked Kaz how he knew you were the one for him. 

Kaz had frozen at the question but his panic had disappeared as soon as it had come as he tightened his arm around your waist as he replied to his surprise with the truth of his heart “She makes me laugh. She’s smart, kind and funny and accepting of who I am. She’s truly the kind of woman who comes once in a lifetime. She’s beautiful and impossible. The way we got here was unexpected. But no matter how I think about it... we were meant to be. And the more time I spend with her, I know that I don’t want to lose her.”

Everyone cooed over the answer but you had frozen at Kaz’ answer as you looked at him in amazement and surprise but Kaz didn’t meet your eyes. The lady was insistent on knowing what you liked so much about Kaz that you knew you had to marry him. You wanted to hit that woman with the tray of champagne because she was putting you in a very awkward position at the moment. 

“He is... well, one night we were just gazing at the stars and talking when I looked over at him and it struck me that he is my closest friend. He’s awesome, intelligent, strong, brave and protects those who he cares about. How could I not want to be with him?” you had replied easily and sincerely with a tender and sweet smile shocking Kaz who had not expected such an answer that sounded terrifyingly real. 

Both of you had escaped the crowd and made it to the vault in time. You had distracted the guards while Kaz broke into the vault and took what he needed. Both of you were on the verge of an escape when both of you heard footsteps heading your way. Kaz had looked at you with desperation and desire as he had pushed you against the wall but before you could say anything, his lips were moving against yours passionately and fiercely, roughly and hungrily devouring you as his hands explored your body and sparks flew within him as you kissed him back with fierce passion and overwhelming emotion as you wrapped your arms around him, pulling him closer toward you. 

Kaz couldn’t stop. He knew what he felt for you was a weakness. And if anything, you felt the same way about him too. And Kaz was secretly ecstatic that you felt the same way toward him. But Kaz had realized as he broke into the vault, he was a criminal. He was Kaz Brekker, the King of Ketterdam, the Bastard of the Barrel who had no weakness and who could not afford to love anyone. Kaz had realized the true harsh reality that he could never love you the way you deserve to be loved. He was not a man made for love. He was a monster created for chaos and cruelty. And you were weakening him, bringing his softer and vulnerable side that he had hidden from the world for so long. He couldn’t let it happen. As Kaz kissed you, he kissed you goodbye as he held you in his arms trying to keep you with him for a bit longer but he knew he had to end it before the world ended him. 

The guards who had been patrolling cleared their throats when they had seen you and Kaz and you had narrowly escaped their scrutiny and attention as a very handsy couple. When both of you had left the party, Kaz hardened his heart ignoring your pleasant conversation and then your inquiring questions. It didn’t take you long to notice this sudden change in Kaz who had grown cold and distant from you. 

“Kaz!” you had snapped as you shoved him getting his attention “What is wrong with you? What’s going on?”

“Y/N... I’m not your fucking husband, so stop nagging me!” snarled Kaz harshly, the softness in his eyes completely gone as he looked at you coldly “It’s over. We completed our mission. I got what I needed.”

Kaz started walking away because he didn’t want to see your fallen face when he heard your trembling voice speak up “Is that it?”

“Is that what? Did you think this was real? It was just a game... part of a mission.” replied Kaz coldly, his eyes flashing with harshness as he began to break the one thing he was falling in love with. 

“Don’t. Don’t you dare. I don’t believe you. I know you feel the same way I do, Kaz.” you had replied with a trembling and shaky voice that you tried to keep strong as you looked at him with a pained expression “You - please don’t do this. You can’t just do this to us and then run away from all these feelings because you are scared.”

“Scared? Y/N, I don’t love you. You are an investment to me.” replied Kaz cruelly and harshly shoving down the voice screaming that he was lying as he glared at you. “You are nothing to me!”

You remembered how safe you felt with Kaz and how he had always assured you that you belonged and had a home with him as you felt everything you thought you knew burn once again into ashes as your heart shattered into pieces at the words carelessly and brutally uttered by Kaz and you sucked a breath as you looked at him in disbelief and heartbreak “You don’t love me?”

Kaz answered with cold silence that rang loudly among both of you and he could hear your heart shattering into pieces and had to hold onto looking at how your once bright and happy face now fell into an expression of shocked disbelief and pained suffering as you tried to understand how your world could quickly fall apart. Kaz couldn’t bear to look at your pained expression any longer so he decided to walk away from you, to leave you alone and save himself from the pain. 

“I don’t believe you. Two hours ago, at that party, you wanted me. You were in love with me, Kaz. All these months, you made me believe we could share something special.” you called out, your voice shattered and hurt but there was a sliver of spite and anger in it that stopped him within his tracks as he closed his eyes and stiffened because he was losing you because this had to end “But we can never be that because you put yourself above everyone and within you is -”

 “Is what? A cold monstrous dark dead heart?” snapped Kaz clenching his jaw as he turned around to look at you with a dark and cold look in his eyes as he thought of how everything they had built up on a shaky ground was now falling apart “I thought you knew better by now. I don’t have a heart, Y/N.”

“Who knows? Because you never show anyone who you are!” you had spat out with tears in your eyes as you looked at Kaz with hurt and pain. “You aren’t letting me in, Kaz!”

“Nothing good comes from loving people! Everyone leaves in the end. I intend to live my life knowing that I have no weakness that my enemies will not exploit against me and knowing that I have no one who loves me mourning for me when I’m gone wishing every single moment that I would come back for them!” yelled Kaz fiercely, his eyes flashing with powerless reminiscence of a destroyed childhood and suffering that had made him monstrous as he looked at you knowing that he couldn’t afford to love you, not when he was weakened with you, not when he could never give you peace. 

“Well then, I love you! Isn’t that the worst thing you’ve ever heard?” you had screamed at him hysterically, tears rolling down your eyes as you felt nothing but piercing heartbreak and completely broken at how casually cruel and brutal he was being breaking you into pieces. 

Kaz’ breath hitched as he froze at your confession, his heart skipping a beat traitorously with hope and happiness but he collected himself reminding himself that both of you could never have a shot in the dark because he was too damaged to be loved by you as his lips curled into a cruel sneer “You disgust me! It’s too bad for you that I don’t love you. That you didn’t make the cut into my heart. Why would you do that to yourself?”

“You - you shouldn’t have let me in! You shouldn’t have made me feel safe with you! You shouldn’t have made me feel like I belong with you and the Dregs are my home!” you had snapped in unbearable pain that burned every inch of you as you gasped through a broken sob and looked at Kaz who looked so pretty like the devil through the tears as you slapped him “Because now it’s far too late!”

Kaz felt the sting of the slap but your words lashed across his heart more than the pain of the slap. He clenched his jaw as he felt his heart bleed in unbearable pain as he looked at you in hurt and wistfulness. He wanted to take back all his cruel words that broke you and crumpled you but he knew he couldn’t do that. 

And as Kaz looked at you, he wanted you more than anything in the world. More than all the kruge and the most beautiful paintings and precious jewels that he spent his life chasing to steal. Kaz was painfully aware of the aching desire he had to call you only his and to come home to your bright smile and tender heart every single day. Kaz wanted more than anything to hold your hand through life and death and to love you with all your scars and bruises and protect you from the rest of the world. Kaz had never felt this kind of powerful love and aching desire for anyone in his life, the kind that made him want to live each moment and love fearlessly. He wanted you so much that he was afraid that what he shared with you could bring him back to life as Kaz Rietvald or break him down.

Kaz loved you. Kaz had so much love inside him that he wanted to give you but he was terrified of how much you meant to him and what he would do to the world if you ever were hurt. As Kaz looked at the moonlight shining upon you, Kaz believed in Saints who had created the most perfect punishment fitting for him. For he was a monster, and it was only fitting for a monster never to hold and have what he loved the most in this world. 

Kaz felt you sense his reluctance and desire for you as you took his hand in yours and caressed his cheek gently as he was hypnotized by your tender eyes as he stared at the one that he loved and dreamed of as you softly and earnestly confessed “Kaz...I know you are scared. I’m terrified too. But I want you. I love you with all your flaws and scars, Kaz. Don’t give up on us. So let’s stop pretending and do this for real.”

Kaz’ breath hitched as he leaned toward you, drawn in like a moth to a flame. He could feel your breath fanning against his cheek as he inhaled in your intoxicating perfume and felt your hot skin against his lips that longed to kiss you. His eyes fluttered shut and his heart was racing inhumanely as his mind forgot to remind him that you were a bad idea. You were an addiction he couldn’t yet give up on and wanted more and more until he was completely satisfied. Kaz had an inkling he would always be wanting more of you as his hand held the nape of your neck wondering how something that was so rationally wrong could feel so perfectly right. 

He did not ask for this. He did not ask for you in his life. You were beautiful, intelligent, dynamic, wonderful and brighter than fireworks in the night sky. Kaz did not ask to be plagued by these feelings for you, to be driven to distraction every time you entered a room. 

“Say you want me like I want you maddeningly.” your voice whispered as your breath fanned his cheek, and Kaz couldn’t breath or think as he was lost in his storm of feelings for you as his lips lingered close enough toward yours eager to taste you.

But your words jolted him from this madness as he took a deep breath and stumbled back from you, realizing that he had been giving into his weaknesses and he breathed heavily trying to compose himself. What had he been thinking? What was he doing? This wasn’t fair and - this wasn’t right. Kaz ran his hand through his hair as he convinced himself that this wasn’t love, this was a distraction, a fleeting infatuation that would pass with time. You were not going to be his destruction. Kaz felt a bitter taste in his mouth as he convinced himself that he was not the one for you. You deserved someone better, someone who was not broken and damaged who would only bring you down. 

“I don’t love you. You were a pleasant distraction from my work.” replied Kaz firmly and coldly as his heart cried out at the lie but he knew it had to be done as he looked you in the eye “This isn’t a fairytale, Y/N. I am your employer and you are my Dreg. So stop being delusional and be what I need you to be and do what I need you to do.”

Then it had taken everything in Kaz to walk away leaving you alone in the dark, the masterpiece of what they had torn apart as you felt alone, tears of heartbreak and pain running down your cheeks. 

It hadn’t taken long for everyone else to notice what had gone wrong between you and Kaz. Both of you had been inseparable, never one without another and now both of you were distant and apart. Kaz kept his distance coldly and cruelly from you refusing to listen and talk to you as you tried to fight for them again and again and the brightness in your eyes began to fade away slowly as you wondered where you had gone wrong as you sat in the dark choking on your sobs dying inside of pain and heartbreak. 

Kaz didn’t know that you were trying to hold onto him as you stayed in your room. After a while, you stopped coming to see Kaz but your presence lingered with him as he heard you play the violin, vulnerable, soft and sad, melancholy heart tugging and heart breaking melodies that would float through the Slat down to the streets. The melodies you played were piercingly agonizing, beautifully emotional and reminded Kaz every single moment of the memories he had shared with you, the unconditional joy he had felt in your presence and now the sorrow that ached within him at your absence as tears sprung into his eyes. He wasn’t the only one affected by your emotional performances. One of the most toughest Dregs who was violent had burst into tears when he had heard you performing a heartbreaking farewell song. 

One day, Kaz couldn’t bear it any longer as he quietly walked toward your room as his eyes fell on you facing the window playing an achingly sad and sweet melody that touched Kaz’ cold heart feeling that your melody was a breathtaking story that never got a happy ending. 

“Is it a sad song?” asked Kaz softly as he lingered at the door, his eyes full of sadness and curiosity when you had finished playing and he noted that you didn’t look surprised at his presence. 

“Nothing is sad until its over. Then everything is.” you replied quietly and contemplatively, your eyes full of grief and heartbreak as you looked at him with a sliver of hope in your heart. 

Kaz had felt a lump of emotion swell up in his throat as he tried to speak but he was too lost in your eyes that mirrored how he felt and you took a step toward him “Kaz... I just wanted to say -”

“Y/N - I just came to say it’s enough.” said Kaz clearing his throat and taking hold of himself as he took on the coldness and harshness against you who looked slightly confused “Enough of your melancholy whining and playing the violin! It’s a headache and distracting all of us from doing important things.”

Kaz had watched you freeze in shock at his order, your eyes burning bright in disbelief and hurt and Kaz knew it that you loved playing on your violin. Your violin was the most precious possession in the world to you and you would never give up your violin to save yourself. You loved playing music on your violin more than anything in the world and to hear Kaz order you to stop playing the violin was an equivalent to ordering you drown yourself and kill yourself. 

The despair and grief in your eyes flashed into cold anger as you gripped your violin protectively “You once looked me in the eyes and told me that you would be by my side until the end. But it’s wonderful to see that you are okay being a liar who wants everything to revolve around you. I guess my pain - the pain you caused is such an imposition to you.”

“Y/N... I’m sick of you! So please stop playing the violin! If you so much as play a note on that stupid thing, I will burn it!” exclaimed Kaz who had felt anger that derived out of guilt and self - loathing as he glared at you with lightning in his eyes. 

Kaz saw you were paralyzed with shock at his cruel words that he suddenly regretted as he looked at your grief-stricken expression but he didn’t want to stay and dwell on it as he turned away but as he took a few steps away from you, he heard you say in disappointment and sadness “I thought you might be different than the rest of the monsters in this world. But I guess you are all the same.”

Kaz had frozen but before his anger could get the best of him, he had marched to his office. You had looked down at the streets of Ketterdam that were haunted by your father who had come before you, your brother who you had lost to the cruelty of this city and the one person you had always felt like you belonged in this godforsaken city had abandoned you making you feel unspeakably lonely and terrified, unbearably heartbroken and hurt. You had been the phoenix in this city rising from the ashes every single time they burned you but you were getting tired of rising and fighting like it was nothing. Kaz had dealt the final blow. 

When Nina had offered to take you with her, you had not hesitated. Kaz had been surprised that you had accepted and something in him wanted to stop you from leaving to Ravka. But he stayed silent as you packed your bags and left for Ravka with Nina without saying goodbye to him as he had the deadly sinking feeling that he was losing you. 

Kaz had expected that he wouldn’t miss you at all. After all, it was good that you were far away from him as possible and it would give him time to move from this disaster. But the air was thick with loss and indecision as he realized the truth of the saying that you never knew what you had until it was gone. Kaz had thought your absence would only satisfy him and give him the satisfaction that he was right all along.

But Kaz had been completely, utterly, tragically wrong. 

Because after you had left, everything seemed empty and wrong to Kaz. Your absence could be felt in every single vein in Kaz’ body and your absence taunted him as he felt the little things about your presence in his life. His office that had once been full of light and warmth, a place of shelter from the cruelty of the world where he shared sacred moments of sincere smiles and easy conversations with you had now become cold and dark, empty of your vivid intelligence and easy laughter that lit it up as Kaz stared frozen at the blueprints, maps, documents, contracts that didn’t make any sense to him any longer. Your scent of sharp jasmine and comforting pages of books lingered on his pillow that he buried his head into every night trying to hold onto you as he missed you terribly. Kaz missed your incredible intelligence and imagination that saw the world through different eyes and observed things that everyone else missed. Kaz felt your absence ache terribly at the lack of beautiful, magical and lovely music that you would play on your violin during the most random and inconvenient times of the day when you needed to think. Kaz missed the little things from the little soft and knowing smile you had reserved only for him, the midnight conversations that made them smile and cry, the afternoons you would come back from your favorite café to share coffee and pastries with him, your furrowed brow when you were focused on sketching, and the playfulness and childlike innocence you exuded brightening his life. 

Kaz couldn’t bear your absence that echoed in this godforsaken city of Ketterdam. Ketterdam, the city that used to be a reminder of Jordie was now driving Kaz mad by screaming your name everywhere Kaz went. Kaz couldn’t walk past and live in this city of blood that was now haunted by you as he was reminded of you in each place from your room that used to be scattered with papers, books and boards that were marked with ongoing investigations but now was empty of activity, the marketplace you frequented bargaining with the vendors driving them to despair, the bookshops in the University District you lingered in for long hours, the Crow Club where you laughed and drank with the Crows sharing intimate and secret glances with Kaz, the library where you loved to read losing track of time, the waffle house where you and Nina loved to eat waffles, the hot chocolate stand where you and Kaz would always buy and drink hot chocolate after a heist or a job or whenever they passed it by, the crowded canals where you liked to sit and sketch landscapes of Ketterdam, the harbor shore where you liked to run into the sea and jump around in the waves childishly and freely and the bar your friend Steve owned where Kaz had first met you. 

Your seat at the table was empty and no one in the Dregs dared to sit on it. Everyone in the Dregs missed you too. Jesper didn’t frequent the Slat often and when he did was restless and anxious, Wylan was quiet and thoughtful as he worked on his bombs but when something went wrong, he would be frustrated and once snapped in anger at one of the innocent newly recruited Dregs because no one else except you understood him and his love for inventions. Inej prayed daily to her Saints to keep you and Nina safe, posted letters all the Crows and the Dregs wrote to you, sent you little trinkets, and tidied your room replacing the wilted flowers and arranging it. Matthias would try to raise everyone’s spirits as he reminisced of good times with you making everyone smile and laugh and encouraging the Dregs to keep going but inside he was worried for your wellbeing since you were the first friend he had from Hellgate until now. 

Kaz also was subjected to high sass levels of incredibly frustrated and angry intelligent, skilled and protective teenagers and your friends in the Dregs who were first seen by you and touched by your kindness to them in the streets and were forever in your debt for giving them a home and a purpose. This was the worst punishment yet for hurting you and he wished that he had never done anything to you because the revenge from the kids and friends in the Dregs who loved you was worse than any humiliation he had been subjected to. 

He had once come down in the morning to get coffee but the last of the coffee was taken by the dark haired, sassy kid called Hari who had marched into the kitchen completely covered in blood as he held an axe and glared at Kaz as he marched away with the jug of coffee, never letting Kaz get coffee at any given moment. The red head named Betty who was completely mad at Kaz had arranged to deliver the most distasteful cakes that tasted horrible to him every single day with the most hurtful and imaginative sayings on the top ranging from ‘IT’S GARBAGE DAY. CAN’T BELIEVE THEY HAVE A WHOLE DAY DEDICATED TO YOU’, ‘SORRY YOU ARE SUCH A HATEFUL BITCH’, ‘YOUR WHOLE LIFE IS A JOKE’, and a cake with a middle finger on it that said ‘YOUR LOSS’. There were three kids named Tony, Sabrina and James who helped you with your investigations and whenever Kaz ordered them to do anything, they would defy him sassily by shrugging him off and not taking him seriously. There were two twins named Rob and Hal who pranked Kaz every single day after he had broken your heart, nearly driving Kaz crazy but Kaz could never trace the prank back to them but Kaz knew it was them when they smirked in amusement whenever they saw Kaz covered with glitter and pink confetti or Kaz’ hair completely blonde and purple. The curly haired boy named Joe who you had given all your waffles to on that terribly hungry day would replace Kaz’ gloves with brightly colored, crazily patterned leather gloves, hide Kaz’ documents in places where Kaz couldn’t find them, replace Kaz’ coats with bright and colorful coats, redecorate Kaz’ cane into silly shapes and replaced Kaz’ perfume with a spray that made Kaz smell like rotten eggs for days. A medik you trusted and had taken into the Dregs named Hungyun would sharpen his blades and recite facts about surgeries and how to dispose of a body whenever Kaz passed him by so Kaz avoided him all together.

Matthias who had noticed Jesper’s restlessness, Wylan’s frustration, Inej’s worry and the Dregs’ sass had gathered them for a project to cheer you up by making an album about how much you meant to them and soon all of them enthusiastically joined in the creative venture. The only thing that calmed all the Dregs and Crows from starting a revolution was your letters to them that kept them happy that you were doing fine. 

Kaz received your letters and he read them the moment he received them. You wrote so beautifully about Ravka and how it was so different to Ketterdam. Every letter was a piece of you that he clung onto as he read it over and over again, tracing your elegant yet messy handwriting full of enthusiasm and sadness as you described everything in vivid detail, put down your own thoughts and confessed how much you missed him and couldn’t forget him no matter how hard you tried. Kaz tried to write back but every time he tried to write, words failed him as emotions overwhelmed him because he didn’t know where to start and he knew if he wrote back and really confronted how he felt, he would be giving into weakness. He couldn’t afford to be weak. So he wrote the letters he wanted to write to you secretly and locked it away and read your letters over and over again never sending you a response hoping that in time you would forget him. 

But the thought of losing you terrified him. Because that was kind of heartbreak time could never mend. Kaz could never feel this kind of love for anyone again and though he was adamant in holding onto strength of not giving into his weakness, he never wanted you to leave him for another because it petrified and terrified him. He could never walk the streets of Ketterdam again if you were not by his side. 

Kaz knew he had to do something when he dreamed of you and started seeing visions of you in broad daylight. The first time Kaz had seen you in broad daylight was when he was supervising the Crow Club and he had seen you laughing in the Crow Club and you winked at him with that charming and knowing manner that always made him blush and his eyes widened in wonder and disbelief because he couldn’t believe you had come back so soon but then you vanished. Kaz had blinked in confusion realizing that he had hallucinated you but that was just the beginning. When Kaz had been walking down the street, he had heard you call out his name cheerfully and his heart had soared in traitorous hope as he swerved to look in the direction where he heard your voice and saw that it was you with your sweet disposition and bright eyes running toward him with wind in your hair and his knees had almost given out but then the vision of you disappeared as a girl ran past him to hug her lover behind him. Kaz tried to shut you out but you were impossible. You were in his head and you didn’t leave. He saw you sitting in his office looking at him in disappointment and anger, tears of sadness rolling down your cheeks as you begged him to love you. 

Kaz couldn’t bear it any longer. Kaz didn’t care how long Nina had said she would be gone with you. Kaz needed you with him. Kaz wanted you with him because he couldn’t live without you since this was hell. Kaz pulled out a new paper and wrote a letter to you ordering you to come back home to him because he couldn’t live like this any longer. He hoped that once you got the letter, you would not hesitate to come back. 

After all Ketterdam was your home. Ketterdam was where you belonged. Ketterdam was where he was. There was nothing special tying you to Ravka. 

As Kaz sent the letter, he looked at the sun setting down on the horizon and muttered with all the sincerity and piercing agony in his heart as he remembered the rare masterpiece he shared with you, remembered you all too well “I miss you, Y/N. Come back to me.”

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@mochinoms-doesart​

@simrah1012  

@hauntedenthusiasttragedy

@marissat1998​

@queenofspades6​

@xhaliemax​

@ladespedidas​

@angie-likes-to-read​

@thatsassyhufflepuff​

@adajoemaya​

@liliandodiaj​

@unicornfairytail​

@b1bbles  

@luvly-writer​

@geekmom3​

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@mdanon027​

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@bey0ndne0​​​

@bwormie​​

@suckmyaries

@mdanon027

@bey0ndne0

#six of crows #shadow and bone #six of crows x reader #six of crows x y/n #six of crows x you #shadow and bone x reader #nikolai lantsov x reader #nikolai lantsov #nikolai lantsov x you #nikolai lantsov x yn #kaz brekker #kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker x you #kaz brekker x y/n #kaz brekker x fem!reader #nina zenik #matthias helvar #inej ghafa #jesper fahey #wylan van eck #wylan van sunshine #zoya nazyalensky #genya safin #david kostyk #tolya and tamar #soc #six of crows fic #nikolai lantsov fic #kaz brekker fic #Grishaverse

[corrodedcoffins-blog]

The Weeklong Date (pt.2)

main masterlist

spencer reid x famous!reader universe

word count: 1.6 k

warnings: suggestive, a lot of taylor swift references

It was the fifth day of Y/N staying with Spencer, and he went back to work yesterday. And staying with Spencer for a few days they’ve built a sort of routine, that was sort of housewifey, Y/N would sit in bed and watch as Spencer got ready for the day; tucking in his shirt, that Y/N found so adorable. Spencer would always kiss Y/N goodbye, and kissing Spencer every morning was a luxury Y/N doesn’t think she will ever take for granted. And while Y/N waited for Spencer to come home for lunch, she was starting to write more and more songs for her next album, or sometimes she would read the books Spencer kept beside his bed. She had started reading ‘The Great Gatsby’ she had always wanted to but it was never the time. 

But her favourite time of the day was when Spencer would come home during his lunch break. Spencer hadn’t been telling Y/N, but everyday when he leaves for lunch, getting back the team was hounding him wondering where he left too. Of course he didn’t tell them, wanting to keep their relationship private for a little while longer. But he never did miss the knowing look Penelope sent his way. 

-

After Spencer’s long day of the team questioning where he’s been, and having to explain why he couldn’t come to the bar with them and that they couldn’t talk him into it like they usually would. Spencer just wanted to spend time with Y/N, take her on a date, hopefully something private enough that she wouldn’t get noticed. And Spencer had a idea he thought was perfect.

Walking through the front door he sees Y/N curled up into his couch, with one of his cardigans on, reading one of his books. Seeing Y/N so openly use his things, and clearly being so comfortable in his space, Spencer felt this overwhelming sense of possessiveness over her. Wanting nothing more than for her to be his. 

“Get dressed, we’re going out.” Spencer urged, grabbing onto Y/N’s forearms to lift her off the couch.

“Where are we going?”

“If I say it won’t be a surprise.”

“I didn’t know it was a surprise. I thought I told you I don’t like surprises, don’t you have an eidetic memory? You should remember that.”

“I do remember, I just don’t believe that you hate them as much as you say. I am also a profiler so I can tell these things.”

-

Surprisingly it was already dark out, but that was a good thing, because Spencer had decided to take Y/N on a late night drive, to go get ice cream. He still hadn’t told Y/N and to say the least she wasn’t too happy with his choice in doing that. 

“Where are we going, Spence?”

“Y’know children often ask the same question, either because they are hoping that the answer will change or because they didn’t understand the answer. Now applying that to this situation, I know you understand me, so I can only assume it’s that you're hoping for a new answer. So I’ll just tell you I’m not giving you another answer.”

“Where are we going to go?” Y/N asked in the darkness of the car, seemingly ignoring what Spencer had just said. Don’t get her wrong, Y/N loves when Spencer rambles, it showcases how smart he is, which is something she greatly loves about him. And she definitely listened to every word he said, but what she doesn’t like is when he uses his knowledge against her.

“You’re impossible.” Spencer said, quickly glancing at Y/N before looking back to the road and continuing, “Having a distraction technique can be a very healthy way of coping with a situation, so how's the construction in your building going?”

Y/N’s apartment building in New York, had a flood while she was away and have been doing construction the last week.

“It’s going good I guess, it’s going to take a little more time then they initially thought, because they found some pipe that was in the wrong place. So I rented a place on Cornelia Street.”

“That’s good.” The car had stopped at a red light causing them both to look towards each other. There was no way to explain it but the air between them had shifted, looking into eachothers eyes, Spencer’s glancing down to Y/N’s lips. He pauses for a moment, before gently pressing his lips to hers. After another moment Y/N pulls back to look back into Spencer’s light brown eyes, a beautiful chestnut, her lips falling open as if to say something, but no words coming out. But only for a moment, until she speaks.

“Spencer, I love you.��

This causes Spencer to hesitate, It was at this moment that Spencer realised, god he loved her. He loved her more than any other girl he’s ever been with, and they weren’t even official, they weren’t dating, on paper they weren’t anything. But they were so much more. 

After a few moments of pondering, thinking about how deeply in love he was with a girl he met a month ago, a car honks behind them the light had turned green and the cars in front of them long gone, causing Spencer to pull over to a side street before he responds. 

“I love you too.”

“Oh, thank god, I thought you were going to say you didn’t love me back. ‘Cause I know this is soon and it’s a bit of a delicate situation, I mean we aren’t even dating-”

For the first time in Spencer’s life it was him cutting of someones rambling. Grabbing Y/N’s hands to grab her attention.

“Hey, I love you. And I want to be with you. I don’t think it’s too soon, sure most couples fall in love four months into a relationship, but when has either of our lifestyles been like most?”

Spencer says, causing Y/N to laugh before she fully realises that they’ve said ‘I love you’ to each other. Then Spencer continues, “I love you. And I want you to be my girlfriend.”

“Yes!” Y/N says, jumping into Spencer's lap and passionately kissing him. 

He loved her. He is her boyfriend. And he loves her. His love was a secret Y/N was more than willing to keep.

“Know where are you taking me?”

“To go get ice cream.”

“Yay!”

-

That night the couple had read The Great Gatsby together, after making sweet, feverish, emotion filled love together, right where they lay now. Y/N laying between Spencer's legs, her back on his stomach, wearing only a clean pair of Spencer’s boxers, with Spencer wearing a pair of Y/N’s favourite pyjama pants on him. Spencer had the book in his hands, with said hands resting on Y/N’s boobs, in order for them both to see the book. No other reason. 

The two both loved this post orgasm bliss they had, spending time together, it was just simple. Reading together, Y/N asking any random question that pops into her head, knowing Spencer will have the answer, like now. 

“I saw today that shrimp can see more colours than humans. How is that possible?”

Before Spencer could answer, a knock interrupted the two, Y/N saying she’ll get it, then getting up to get the door, throwing one of Spencer’s sweater vest overtop of herself.

The popstar answered the door, coming face to face with one of her boyfriend’s co-workers, Derek Morgan. Maybe the worst member of the team to find out this way. Seeing Derek, Y/N became very aware of what clothes she was wearing, or lack thereof. 

“Derek Morgan.”

“Y/N.”

Pulling down the sweater vest of Spencer’s Y/N says, “Um.. You’re looking for Spencer I assume?”

“Yes, I am.” Derek says, not before looking Y/N up and down taking in her appearance. 

“Okay, yes. I will get him. For you.”

Derek mumbles a quick ‘thank you’ before Y/N softly shuts the door after their awkward conversation and runs into Spencer’s bedroom, where he is lying on his bed, still clad in a pair of pyjama pants and shirtless.

“To answer your question about shrimp, the mantis shrimp can see more colours due to it’s-”

As Spencer starts answering her previous question, Y/N places her hands on the sides of Spencer's neck to gently interrupt him. 

“My love, I normally would never cut off your rants, because I love you and I love your brain. But Derek is outside waiting for you.”

“What? Derek? Why is he here?” Spencer says, jumping out of his bed, putting on a shirt. Much to Y/N’s displeasure. 

“I don’t know, I didn’t ask. I just tried to get out of there fast because I’m only wearing this.”

“Derek saw you like this?”

“Hon, don’t be jealous.”

“Why were you answering the door dressed like that anyway?”

“I thought it was our dinner.” Y/N innocently said, genuinely thinking it was their dinner they had ordered. 

After getting dressed Spencer opens the door, him now coming face to face with Derek, Y/N staying out of view in the kitchen 

“Hey, pretty boy.”

“Hi. Um.. Wha-What are you doing here?”

“Other than clearly disturbing your romantic evening?.. Hotch called, we have a case and I was close by so I said I would pick you up. I thought you would be alone…”

“Oh, well I’ll get my go bag and we can leave. Come in.”

Spencer left the door open for Derek to enter the apartment, walking down the hall to his room. Derek walked inside, not even having a chance to talk to Y/N, as Spencer was speedily reentering the room.Spencer presses a quick, loving kiss to Y/N lips, they mumble their goodbyes, before Spencer ushers himself and Derek out the door. Derek and Y/N yelling out their own goodbyes before they’re gone.

“You’ve got a lot of explaining to do, pretty boy.”

#spencer #reid #dr spencer reid #spencer reid #spencer reid x famous!reader #spencer reid fic #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x singer!reader

[sunsetkerr]

Y/N L/N BREAKS DOWN 'CORNELIA STREET' | s.kerr

summary: you breakdown the story behind and the lyrics of your song 'cornelia street'. [1k words]

pairing: singer!reader x sam kerr

notes: classic genius video

[STUDIO; PALE PINK BACKGROUND, Y/N SITTING]

Y/N L/N: Hi, I'm Y/N L/N and today I'm breaking down my new single 'Cornelia Street'.

'CORNELIA STREET: THE BREAKDOWN'

[CORNELIA STREET INSTRUMENTAL PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND]

[STUDIO; PALE PINK BACKGROUND. Y/N SITTING, A SMILE ON HER FACE]

Y/N L/N: I wrote this song about my girlfriend, Sam and how we kinda came to be? I guess? It's about realising how much a newer love means to you and how much it could ruin you.

[INSTRUMENTAL PAUSES]

Y/N L/N: Well.. that was a little dramatic, wasn't it?

'WE WERE IN THE BACKSEAT DRUNK ON SOMETHING STRONGER THAN THE DRINKS IN THE BAR // "I RENT A PLACE ON CORNELIA STREET" I SAY CASUALLY IN THE CAR'

[STUDIO; PALE PINK BACKGROUND. Y/N SITTING, A SMILE ON HER FACE]

Y/N L/N: These lyrics reference one of the first times that I ever met Sam. She was in London and playing for Chelsea, I was there co-writing with another artist at the time and we were introduced by some mutual friends. We ended up in an Uber together after a night out and she asked what I was doing in the UK, and I told her about a little apartment that I rented at the time.

[CUTS TO A CLOSER SHOT OF Y/N'S FACE]

Y/N L/N: She soon became very very well acquainted with that apartment.

'WE WERE A FRESH PAGE ON THE DESK FILLING IN THE BLANKS AS WE GO // AS IF THE STREET LIGHTS POINTED IN AN ARROWHEAD LEADING US HOME'

Y/N L/N: Sam and I weren't really sure what we were doing at the time, if it was official or not, we were making it up as we went really. She's got a super busy schedule, her workload is very demanding. That was something we both came to terms with very quickly in our little 'will they, won't they' situation.

[CUTS TO Y/N HOLDING UP A POLAROID OF SAM POINTING TO THE 'CORNELIA ST' STREET SIGN]

Y/N L/N: I think we were really lucky that my schedule wasn't super hectic at that point in time, because I'm not sure how we would've managed it (CHUCKLES). Now we've been together for nearly two years, we've worked out a system.

'AND I HOPE I NEVER LOSE YOU, HOPE IT NEVER ENDS, I'D NEVER WALK CORNELIA STREET AGAIN // THAT'S THE KIND OF HEARTBREAK TIME COULD NEVER MEND, I'D NEVER WALK CORNELIA STREET AGAIN'

Y/N: This part is my favourite.

[CLIPS OF SAM FILMED ON A SUPER-8 FILM CAMERA, Y/N IS FILMING. SAM IS LAYING ON THE COUCH LOOKING OVER TO Y/N, SHE WAVES SHYLY FROM HER SPOT UNDERNEATH A GREY THROW BLANKET]

Y/N L/N: It's pretty self-explanatory to be completely honest. I don't plan on losing her anytime soon.

[B-ROLL FOOTAGE; SAM SITTING ON A CHAIR BEHIND THE CAMERA, WATCHING Y/N SPEAK. A BIG SMILE ON HER FACE]

'AND BABY, I GET MYSTIFIED BY HOW THIS CITY SCREAMS YOUR NAME // AND BABY, I'M SO TERRIFIED OF IF YOU EVER WALK AWAY'

Y/N L/N: I had never watched football before Sam... like, ever. I wasn't a fan, I had no interest in it. So when we started dating she took me to my first ever game and I watched her play again Man City. The crowd just loved her (Y/N SHAKES HER HEAD IN DISBELIEF). I never realised how much Sam could hold thousands of people in the palm of her hand. They adore her.

[CLIPS OF Y/N ON THE BIG SCREEN AT A CHELSEA GAME, PANS TO SAM ON THE PITCH, SMILING UP AT THE FOOTAGE]

Y/N L/N: It was funny because.. we had just gotten back from flying from.. somewhere? who knows. but Sam had gotten in the morning of the game and the crowd did this chant. It was 'even with jet lag, she's better than you' (LAUGHS).

[CLIP OF THE CROWD CHANTING 'EVEN WITH JET LAG SHE'S BETTER THAN YOU'. SAM TURNING AROUND TO LOOK AT THE CROWD SHYLY]

Y/N L/N: I mean it's true (SHRUGS). I was so taken aback by how much they all just loved her, but now whenever I sit in the crowd section, I make sure we chant it... it's my favourite.

'BACK WHEN WE WERE CARD SHARKS, PLAYING GAMES, I THOUGHT YOU WERE LEADING ME ON // I PACKED MY BAGS, LEFT CORNELIA STREET BEFORE YOU EVEN KNEW I WAS GONE'

Y/N L/N: There was a moment before Sam and I officially got together that I almost.. ran away? kinda.

SAM (OFFSCREEN): Kinda?!

Y/N L/N: (LAUGHS ALONG WITH THE CREW) I did, I completely did. I for some reason just got really nervous that she wasn't as serious about it. I had lots of conflicting feelings at the time, but Sam was very quick to get me back on track and make me realise what the important things were.

'BUT THEN YOU CALLED, SHOWED YOUR HAND, I TURNED AROUND BEFORE I HIT THE TUNNEL // SAT ON THE ROOF, YOU AND I'

Y/N L/N: She fixed it all, as she does. Sam is very good at that.

[CLIP OF Y/N AND SAM KISSING OVER THE BARRIER OF CHELSEA'S HOME GROUND]

Y/N L/N: She fixes everything.

'YOU HOLD MY HAND ON THE STREET, WALK ME BACK TO THAT APARTMENT. YEARS AGO, WE WERE JUST INSIDE // BAREFOOT IN THE KITCHEN, SACRED NEW BEGINNINGS THAT BECAME MY RELIGION, LISTEN'

Y/N L/N: I don't stay at Cornelia Street anymore, Sam and I live together now when we're both in London. We went back before I wrote this song and it was so surreal to realise that someone else was now in that apartment.

[PHOTOS OF Y/N AND SAM FADE ONTO THE SCREEN, ALL FROM INSIDE THE CORNELIA STREET APARTMENT]

Y/N L/N: We spent so much time in that apartment it was like our first home together. Really it was just a place for us to spend our down time. I love that apartment and I try to go back every time I'm in London... which is a lot. So, thanks to Cornelia Street for having me and thank you to Sam for having me.

[CUTS TO A CLOSE UP OF Y/N]

Y/N L/N: I'm very lucky.

#one shots . * • . #sam kerr x reader #sam kerr imagine #sam kerr one shot #woso imagine #woso one shot #woso x reader

[h-f-k]

"i rent a place on cornelia street", i said casually in the car...

#taylor swift #tswiftedit #tayswiftedit #poster design #graphic design #graphic #TERRIBLE timing but i love this edit

[lightasthesun]

Dialogue Prompts (Taylor's Version)

1♪ “You are the best thing that's ever been mine.”

2♪ “I will never leave you alone.”

3♪ “I'm captivated by you, like a fireworks show.”

4♪ “How's life? Tell me how's your family?”

5♪ “I'm sorry for that night.”

6♪ “Run away now.”

7♪ “Run as fast as you can.”

8♪ “They are the lucky ones.”

9♪ “Have we met?”

10♪ “Who do you love?”

11♪ “Remember this moment?”

12♪ “Remember this feeling.”

13♪ “Life makes love look hard.”

14♪ “I love you. I loved you from the very first day.”

15♪ “Meet me tonight.”

16♪ “You are not the exception.”

17♪ “I can't stop thinking about you and I.”

18♪ “I'm setting you free.”

19♪ “It's gonna be alright.”

20♪ “It's in the past.”

21♪ “Heaven can't help me now.”

22♪ “No one has to know what we do.”

23♪ “Are you insane?”

24♪ “It's been a long six months.”

25♪ “You're my best friend.”

26♪ “It might blow up in your pretty face.”

27♪ “Come here.”

28♪ “I said 'I love you', you say nothing back.”

29♪ “I knew it all along.”

30♪ “How'd we end up on the floor anyway?”

31♪ “She's laughing up at us from hell.”

32♪ “I don't remember.”

33♪ “The end is coming.”

34♪ “You should be doing more.”

35♪ “You have to trust more freely.”

35♪ “Love is a lie.”

36♪ “It's time now, let go.”

37♪ “This is it. I've had enough.”

38♪ “I swear I'm gonna change.”

39♪ “I still love you.”

40♪ “It's been you all along.”

41♪ “I need you.”

42♪ “Look at you, worrying so much about things you can't change.”

43♪ “I'm sorry, too.”

44♪ “Don't get attached.”

45♪ “Everybody knows that.”

46♪ “Why?!”

47♪ “Go out and have some fun.”

48♪ “Why did you let her go?”

49♪ “It's not just a phase I'm in.”

50♪ “Believe in one thing, I won't go away.”

51♪ “I'll wait for you.”

52♪ “Do you know how much I miss you.”

53♪ “All's well that ends well.”

54♪ “Fuck the Patriarchy.”

55♪ “It's supposed to be fun turning 21.”

56♪ “I keep waiting for you but you never come.”

57♪ “I don't know what to think.”

58♪ “You look beautiful tonight.”

59♪ “Forever and always.”

60♪ “I'm in love with you.”

61♪ “There's nothing you can say.”

62♪ “Too late.”

63♪ “Did you ever think of me?”

64♪ “We're still friends.”

65♪ “Take my hand.”

66♪ “I think he did it.”

67♪ “They all want to be you.”

68♪ “What's a lifetime of achievement if I pushed you to the edge and you were too polite to leave me?”

69♪ “Dancing is a dangerous game.”

70♪ “I survived.”

71♪ “What a sad sight.”

72♪ “Yes.”

73♪ “Who knows what could've been.”

74♪ “Are you sure?”

75♪ “This is me trying.”

76♪ “Fuck you forever.”

77♪ “Sir, I think he's bleeding out.”

78♪ “Doc, I think she's crashing out.”

79♪ “Get in, let's drive.”

80♪ “I'd die for you in secret.”

81♪ “Give me a reason.”

82♪ “Im fine.”

83♪ “I love you (ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?)”

84♪ “Where we gonna go?”

85♪ “I rent a place on Cornelia Street.”

86♪ “I don't know.”

87♪ “I'd die for you.”

88♪ “Damn, it's 7am.”

89♪ “Are you ready for it?”

90♪ “Don't thrown away a good thing.”

91♪ “You're gorgeous.”

92♪ “Go, go, go!”

93♪ “That's a lie.”

94♪ “Does he know?”

95♪ “Get your shit together.”

96♪ “Nothing is gonna change.”

97♪ “You made us proud.”

98♪ “Don't leave me here alone.”

99♪ “I know you don't.”

100♪ “We always walked a very thin line.”

#writing prompts #dialogue prompt #writing #dialog prompts #taylor swift prompts #i wanted to do champagne problems so bad but there was no suitable dialogue in it for general prompts and i couldn't come up with anything #angst prompts #romantic prompts #star wars #bbc merlin #fanfiction prompts #writers ask game #writing asks #ask game

[9w1ft]

chloe or sam or sophia or marcus is suchhhh a karlies perspective song 🙁

anon i was LITERALLY working on a karlie perspective interpretation of this song when i saw you send this in. i think it pings very hard! and if it has taylor singing from her perspective i do think strongly that it would still be a mix of exchanges

this is all still fresh and unsettled to me but since you happened to drop me this anon at such a good time i guess ill share some of the notes i had:

i think that it is set up to evoke the image of taylor selling her cornelia street place but she was actually renting that place so it’s not a perfect fit, so i thought it is also interesting that karlie put her famous west village apartment up for sale in late september 2019 and it found a buyer by december

there’s the maroon reference and the singer asks what would it take to make this color go away (taylor was the one seeing the maroon (after the election, imo) and she uses the words saw and bones which are also in the song maroon),

also this idea of the 2016 election leading to taylor putting distance between her and karlie’s public relationship through feuding rumors. rebuilding in 2018 and 2019 to what felt like they might be publicly friends again only for taylor to go send karlie into exile again after the masters were bought, so the song sort of touching on this cycle they’ve been through.

lines like “you turned me into an idea of sorts” and “if you want to break my cold cold heart just say it loved you the way that you were” had me thinking about objet d’art and the actual muse discourse that matters—the discussion of what’s an artist and what’s a muse, and picasso discussions we have had, the picasso book on the coffee table in abut hero, the idea that taylor ended up treating karlie like picasso treated his muses, over time warping them. and the idea that karlie would have had to have changed so many things about her life and herself over the course of the decade, for taylor’s sake. and i think this could be applied to the things about herself she changed for josh as well.

that is to say i think that the song could be karlie addressing her work husband as well. the song mentions the singer’s youth in a way that makes me imagine it’s being sung to older people than the singer. plus it ends with the use of the word wonder several times, which i think links it to my interpretation of wcs, which i also think is from karlie’s perspective

i have some other stuff but these are the most complete thoughts as of this moment

#muse

[loversj0y]

Cornelia street for your 200 event? Congratulations by the way!!

event masterlist

pairing: wilbur soot x gn! reader

TWS: lots of drinking, anxiety as well

notes: this one was tough to write solely bc... toe breakup. sigh. makes it hurt to use this song tbh. also i just couldnt focus writing this one so if it seems a bit off, thats probably why

wordcount: 1.6k

taglist: @l0veb0mb1ng / @core-queen / @zooone / @lillylvjy / @ghostsacrosslndnfields / @melunnek

The first time you officially met Wilbur was at a random party. It was a summer party one of your classmates had set up, and she told you it would be a small ordeal. The opposite occurred, which truthfully, you should’ve expected given that it was a party to celebrate the classmates moving into their final year of Uni. You didn’t hate the party atmosphere, it was a nice party even if it was more crowded and louder than you’d expected. You had a few drinks and a few good conversations before stumbling into Wilbur. 

You did literally stumble into him, tripping over someone’s shoe and landing against him. His drink knocked into you as well, spilling all over the front of your shirt.

“Oh, holy shit, are you alright?” He asked quickly, holding onto your arms.

“I’m alright, yeah, sorry. Are you?”

He smiled, “I’m fine, don’t worry about it. Let me help clean you up.” He pulled you to the bathroom, closing the door and muting most of the party droning out with it. 

“We had english together, last semester, didn’t we?” He grabbed a towel, drying your shirt off. 

“Uh,” you flushed, “I’ll be honest, I barely payed attention to that class. I was playing Minecraft on my laptop in the back most days.” 

“Oh?” He laughed, “Good to know I wasn’t alone then. I’m Wilbur.” “Y/N. If you can’t tell, I’m not great at first impressions.”

He smiled, “Well, if you want, we could always have a redo.”

“A redo?” You chuckled, “How so?”

“Hm,” he thought, “How about we act like we were too drunk to remember meeting tonight? And then, I know a good, quiet bar downtown where we can show up separately and pretend we don’t know each other until one of us gets the courage to go up to the other?” He grinned up at you.

You laughed loudly, and he looked at you like you hung the stars in the sky, “Okay, yeah. That sounds great.”

You and Wilbur did go to that bar. In fact, it became a common thing for the two of you to go that little dive bar every weekend. It was a bit further from campus, a good thirty minute walk, but it made up for it in the almost secretive energy the bar had, making it easier to hide your growing anxieties and embarrassment about just how close to Wilbur you’d gotten. What started as the fleeting thought about how attractive he was had manifested into a strong crush, one that toustled you like a wave everytime you saw him. It got harder to keep your composure around him. And the best way to combat the shaking hands and stuttering words?

Shots, obviously. As the two of you joked, you both got progressively drunker. To the point where neither of you were able to safely get home. So a cab it was.

When you got in the cab, drunkenly stumbling in, the cabbie asked where he was taking you both.

It occurred to both of you that neither of you wanted to be alone right now, it was only a matter of boldness now.

You looked at Wilbur, “I rent a place on Cornelia Street.”

Wilbur nodded, leaning into your side a bit, “Okay.”

You told the cab driver your address, and he drove quickly, probably not wanting to risk the two drunk college kids puking in his cab. The drunkenness started lightening up on the drive, Wilbur only left tipsy, while you were on the comedown of your drunkenness.

You and Wilbur split the cost once you’d gotten there, and you held onto his arm as you pulled him upstairs. It felt like a stepping stone, a new era of your relationship, to have him come over to your apartment, even if you were still drunk. 

Stumbling in, he looked around, “Your place is really nice.”

“Thanks,” you smiled softly, walking over to the couch with him. You both sat down, probably far closer than you would’ve been if either of you had any sense of personal space or decency left in you.

“You sure you’re good with me staying here tonight?” You snorted softly, “Of course, Wilbur. I’d rather you stay here than try to walk home alone.”

“Aww, someone cares about me,” You flushed a bit, leaning your head against him, “Maybe I do. What about it, hm?”

He wrapped his lanky arms around you, squeezing you, “You sap,” he placed his chin on top of your head, “God, everything you do makes me just want to kiss you more,” he admitted.

“Wait- what?” You asked, suddenly feeling incredibly sober. 

“Yeah,” he hummed, as if it was the easiest thing in the world.

You pulled out of his grasp, sighing, “You’re drunk.”

He chuckled, “You’re the drunk one here, your tolerance is far worse than mine.” You hated admitting that was true.

“Then, were you serious?”

He looked down at you, quiet while he looked over your face and coming to terms with the fact that you were not drunk enough to forget what he’d said, “Yes.”

You reached forward, taking his hands, “Can I… kiss you?”

He nodded quickly, pulling one hand free to rest on your cheek. You pulled him in the rest of the way, kissing him slowly. He tasted sweet, like strawberry liquor and smoke, and it felt like a consequence you’d gladly pay for.

Months went by. Wilbur was always with you, even if you and him hadn’t set an official title to your relationship. You went from autumn air, dancing in the moonlight on your room, wearing his jacket to classes, playing games, the rains of spring, opening windows for the summer air, all to end up here. Graduation had passed a few weeks ago. Wilbur was staying in town, he’d already found a job. You were between two. There was one in town and one pretty far away.

The only thing keeping you from choosing the one where you’d get to stay here, where you’ve lived and loved, was that you didn’t know where you stood with Wilbur. With everything that you two have been through, you still didn’t have an official label. And you kept meaning to talk about it, but you kept putting it off out of worries and concerns. You thought he was leading you on. You knew why you hadn’t talked about it, but why hadn’t he.

It felt selfish to think that, communication was a two-way street after all, but you just could’nt help your own anxieties sometimes. 

So instead of jumping into his arms, you jumped to conclusions. That he was leading you on, that he wasn’t serious about this. So, you planned on leaving. 

You packed a bunch of your things, getting in your car and starting to drive off, without a goodbye. You hadn’t even made a decision on the jobs either, but you were just going to head home for now.

You were about ten minutes out when Wilbur called. You almost didn’t answer. 

“Hello?”

“Hey, love, where are you? I just showed up to your place and you’re gone.”

“I’m leaving, Wilbur.”

He laughed, at first, “Yeah, yeah.” When you didn’t joke with him, he’d gotten far more serious, “What do you mean?”

“I’m just leaving.” “Without saying goodbye?” You never would’ve left if you had. You aimed for bitterness in your words, some part of you almost wanting to start a fight. “Like you’d care much.”

“Darling, why wouldn’t I care?”

“Why did you never say we were dating?”

He was silent, “Wait, is that what this is about? I- I wanted to talk to you about it, but I just panicked, darling. I-”

He paused, seriously considering what he was going to say next, “Darling, I love you. And if you come back now, I promise you, you will never wonder again, because it is within my full intentions to make sure the entire world knows exactly how you are mine.”

“I-I love you too,” you responded quickly. You’d never turned around faster.

That night, you and him sat on the roof, and finally solidified everything you were. You finally selected your job in town, and you couldn’t help but see Wilbur in the city you looked at from that rooftop.

“Look at that,” Wilbur hummed, staring up at your apartment building.

You held his hand tightly, looking up, “Oh, yeah. It’s almost weird to look at.” You smiled. 

He stood behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. You had moved out a year ago now. You and Wilbur found a nice place to live together, and you had been living together since. It was a worthy move, but it still felt weird to look up at your old apartment. 

He nodded, “God, do you remember the first time I cooked for you?”

You laughed, “Yeah, it was our first official date. I had to open all the windows to get the smell of burning out.”

“It was a cleansing fire, I think.” “You would think that,” you laughed louder, leaning into him, “It was good though. A new beginning of sorts.”

“Especially for several of your pans,” he snickered, kissing your cheek softly. 

You chuckled, nodding, “Some of them definitely needed it.” You smiled, sighing softly.

You couldn’t say it outloud, you didn’t want to make Wilbur worried. You just knew that if any residual fears you had about Wilbur leaving you proved true, you’d never be able to walk here again, the entire apartment a reflection of your relationship.

#mar's 200 follower event #mar writes #wilbur soot x reader #wilbur soot #mcyt x reader #wilbur x reader #dsmp x reader #wilbur soot x you #wilbur soot fanfiction #mcyt wilbur

[lipslikethegardensofbabylon]

"I rent a place on Cornelia Street" I say casually in the car… I play it cool with the best of them… we were a fresh page on the desk filling in the blanks as we go… something different bloomed writing in my room… if you ever walk away, I'd never walk Cornelia Street again… there's just one who could make me stay… I hope I never lose you… everything you lose is a step you take…

#taylor swift #parallels #eras tour

[sophietv]

Where "You're Losing Me" fits in the Kaylor Timeline

Ok, so I wanted to sum up what I thought “You’re Losing Me” meant for Kaylor. But most of all, where does it all fit in the Timeline.

First and foremost. It’s important to remember that Midnights is in Taylor’s words: “the stories of 13 sleepless nights scattered throughout my life”.

Which means that the songs on this album are not all recent stories. Some happened a long time ago. 

Like:

Snow On The Beach: being about the Victoria Secret Fashion Show in 2013.

Question…?: About Kissgate in 2014.

One thing that is interesting with Midnights is that songs are sampled over older songs. I believe this serves multiple purposes:

Pointing at the muse (Maroon sampled over KOMH and Cornelia Street),

Pointing at the time and cause of the song (The Great War sampled on Only The Young)

Pointing at the similar emotions the event might have with others (Question…? sampled on OOTW).

So where does that leave us with "You’re Losing Me"? 

When you listen to the song you notice that it’s very similar and seem to have practically the same intro as "Cornelia Street".

More than that, if you play both songs at the same time, the timing is perfect, the intro of one song answers the intro of the other.

So what is Taylor trying to tell us with this?

Everyone was puzzled when the song came out, because it does not fit with the narrative of Champagne Problems and Midnight Rain. Those songs seem to point at Karlie wanting to commit and Taylor being unable to choose her over everything else.

But in You’re Losing Me. It’s quite the contrary. Taylor seems to want to commit and seems unsure of Karlie’s intentions in this relationship. 

So what does it mean?

I think the song points to Cornelia Street to offer a timeline of when the events took place.

And I don’t think they took place at the same time the song Cornelia Street takes place (in 2019), but more likely, when they were living at Cornelia Street.

Taylor rented Cornelia Street from June 2016 to early 2017. 

What happened during this time with Kaylor?

I think, looking back on all the events of 2019. Everyone can at least agree that they were still together at that time.

If you don’t believe it. Watch Miss Americana. The Call It What You Want scene, and you’ll see that Kaylor was indeed alive and well.

I did a thread on Twitter about this, but here’s some important events. 

Octobre 11th 2016: “It’s all part of the fucking story”

Octobre 12th 2016: Taylor went out to the concert where she “started dating Joe”.

Octobre 13th 2016: Taylor is out at the Bowery Ballroom with Karlie and Serena William (yes this is suspicious).

Novembre 7th 2016: Karlie and Taylor are out at Lorde’s birthday.

Novembre 8th 2016: Trump is elected. Karlie posted the famous picture of her and Taylor kissing Lorde’s cheek with the ring (last post of them together at an event)

Novembre 9th 2016: Start of the Love Blackout 

(There’s also the engagement theory that happened in Wyoming in August 2016)

What makes me say the song takes place then and not in 2019?

Well she references the Cornelia Street apartment, with the song sample obviously, but also with those lyrics:

 “remember lookin’ at this room, we loved it ‘cause of the light. Now, I just sit in the dark and wonder if it’s time.” 

I think the lyric “We thought a cure would come through in time, now I fear it won’t” might be about them having to hide their relationship.

And I suspect the results of the 2016 elections has something to do with it (as well as with the Love Blackout).

In the song Taylor is begging Karlie to choose her. 

The song is also not a finality. 

When the song ends we don’t know what happened.

There’s fear, hurt, indecision, but also a bit of hope: “Unless you’re choosin’ me”

Taylor is still wishing it might work out.

So I think the song being sampled on Cornelia Street is to tell us it happened during this time frame (June 2016 - early 2017).

And in the song Cornelia Street there’s:

“Windows swung right open, autumn air

Jacket 'round my shoulders is yours

We bless the rains on Cornelia Street

Memorize the creaks in the floor”

Which points to the Autumn of 2016 (if we follow the timeline).

"Back when we were card sharks, playing games

I thought you were leading me on

I packed my bags, left Cornelia Street

Before you even knew I was gone"

This part points to before that. But still at Cornelia Street. So between June and Septembre 2016.

And it’s talking about a fight they had where Taylor thought Karlie was not genuine with her “I thought you were leading me on” 

Interesting because it fits perfectly with the narrative of “You’re Losing Me”.

"But then you called, showed your hand

I turned around before I hit the tunnel

Sat on the roof, you and I"

And this fight had a happy ending! 

So for all those reasons, this is where I think this sleepless night took place and the fight it’s talking about. 

What does it means for LSK? Not much. But it sure doesn’t mean that they are not together. 

#kaylor #gaylor #you're losing me #cornelia street #LSK

[heda-heather]

Remember when Taylor said “I rent a place on Cornelia Street,” casually in the car.

And Karlie was like, “Awesome!”

And Taylor was like, “No, Karlie, I’m inviting you to come home with me.”

And Karlie was like “OoOoohhh.”

Or is that only my headcannon?

#gaylor #kaylor #friends of dorothea #lgbetty #karlie kloss

[permanentmess]

cornelia street (pietro maximoff x fem!reader)

A/N: I've been sitting on this one for a few months, but I felt weird writing it while I still had a boyfriend. I hope you enjoy!

Warnings: none that I know of, maybe just some mentions of past unhealthy relationships, anxiety, alcohol consumption, etc.

Genre: fluff, minor angst mixed in but a happy ending

Word count: 2,556

GIF NOT MINE

New York City is a chaotic place, which means its absolutely perfect for Tony Stark and his parties. He will find any reason to have them, and that meant that since it was Pietro and Wanda’s birthday, what better occasion?

When you step outside, the nip of the cold February air sobers you every so slightly, and cools your body significantly. Between the bar being packed, the shot of Asgardian liquor you’d had (which had been more than enough, you haven’t sobered in the 5 hours since you had taken said shot), and Pietro’s body tucked next to you, you’d been sweating. 

Although the birthday party had been a lot of fun, you both were more than ready to go home, grateful for the drastic change in noise and temperature. 

Pietro, who is about as drunk as you, takes your hand as he raises his other to signal to one of Tony’s driver’s that he’s ready to go. He lets go of it almost immediately, as you slide into the backseat, but quickly grabs it again once he’s positioned his head to rest on you and slurs a “thank you” to the driver. It will be a long car drive home, but you don’t mind. 

“Do you remember when I had that apartment over here? In, uhh, Greenwich I think.” You can feel the vibrations against your head as he speaks and they soothe you. You nod, remembering what he had told you around the time he started renting it. 

~

You and Pietro were in a cab, heading back to the Stark Tower after attending a Gala that was “important for press” as Tony put it. 

“You know, I rent an apartment on Cornelia Street.” You think it’s random for him to have said, but glancing around you realize you’re quite near it. As you meet his eyes, a flurry of thoughts run through your head, leading you to perk up. 

“Oh my god, do you live near Taylor Swift?! I know she lives around here an-” 

“I tell you I’m secretly renting an apartment, despite already having a place to live, and your first thought is Taylor Swift?” He says it like he’s offended, but he’s grinning the whole time at you. You nod frantically.  

“On a serious note though, why?” You ask him, wanting him to elaborate on his first thought. 

“I’ve never truly lived on my own. Wanda’s always been there, and then I immediately moved into a place with so many people coming and going. Sometimes, I just want to be alone.” You touch his hand lightly and give him a gentle, closed-lip smile. 

“I think that is a perfectly valid reason.” 

~

“I do. You loved that place, especially after missions.” You recall, staring out the windshield. The lights of the city had always left you dazzled, moreso now that you were drunk. 

“Yeah, but I liked it more with you around.” He presses a kiss to your head. 

~ 

Your feet were tired, mostly because Wanda and Nat insisted that Gogo boots would be super cute and if you got drunk enough (a difficult feat with your super-powered body), you wouldn’t feel it. 

And while they were right on the cute part, by the time you were reaching the last stretch before Pietro’s apartment, you were near tears with how much you just wanted to rest them. The place Tony held his Halloween party wasn’t far from there, but you underestimated how long it would feel by the end of the night. You abruptly stop when you feel a few rain drops , and groan. Pietro stops next to you just as quickly. 

“You okay?” He asks and then suddenly feels the drops. You sigh. 

“My feet hurt so bad that I’m about to cry and now we have to walk in the rain the rest of the way back.” He stares at you for a moment, contemplating. He’s been staring at you a lot lately, even when he thinks you don’t notice. And he’ll hold your hand a lot more, and he’s been kissing you on the cheek more often. Things friends typically don’t do. 

“I can help you with pain, I’ll just carry you back, but,” he pauses. “You have to dance in the rain with me once we get back.” 

“Doesn’t that….kinda defeat the purpose of carrying me back? I’ll still have to stand and move around to do that once we get back.” 

“Then I’ll just put your feet on mine and move us. Problem solved,” he squats down, curls bouncing slightly. Thankfully, you had gone the practical route and decided on shorts. (Matt Murdock had recently been employed as the Avenger’s lawyer, but you had found out about his Daredevil side and thought it would be hilarious to dress up as a “sexy Daredevil” for Halloween, hence the Gogo boots. When you described him your costume, he laughed at you, but approved.)

By the time you were set down in front of Pietro’s building, it was raining harder. But at that point, your feet didn’t hurt as badly as before, and you were soaking in Pietro’s warmth as you took advantage of being close to him. 

“Thank you.” You give him a grin, holding out your hand. “My good sir, would you ever be so kind as to offer a simple girl such as I a dance?” He looked at you like you had two heads before grinning back at you and pulling you closer. You could hear music from one of the apartments around, and danced to the bass of what you thought was “Monster Mash.” 

Once the song ended, you shivered and he raised his eyebrows at you, nodding his head towards the door. You muttered a quick yes but he paused for a moment longer, staring at you and your soaking wet form. Goosebumps covered your arms and your hair looked like you had just taken a shower. He leaned forward and gave you the lightest of kisses against the lips, shocking you to your core, before punching in his code and grabbing your hand to lead you upstairs, ready to decompress from the night. 

~

“I did stay there quite a bit, huh? Kinda defeated the purpose of you living alone,” you mention and he lifts his head to look at you. 

“I had already been living there for a month, I still wanted you around then though. You know me, I do what I want,” he told you, looking you in the eyes. 

You think leaving the party had sobered you significantly, but you were always tipsy off of the way Pietro treated you. He made you feel so loved, in a way no one before him had ever even remotely done, and he never felt fake about anything. There was no pressure to be someone you weren’t, or do something you didn’t want to. You smiled as you played with the engagement ring with your right hand, Pietro’s holding your left hand. 

“What are you thinking about?” You ask him, tilting your head. 

“Just how lucky I am to have you. Я тебя люблю.” It makes you smile. You had learned Russian for a mission once, in an intense course, and he wanted to support you, so he took it with you. It made you reciprocate the sentiment exactly. 

“Я тоже тебя люблю.” You lean your head back against him, the tapering of the alcohol making you drowsy. You recount more times on Cornelia Street. 

~

It was quite the common occurrence for you to be at Pietro’s apartment without him there, especially when anxious.  

Today was no exception. 

You and Pietro decided to book a spontaneous trip to Lake Como last week, but ironically, that was not the reason you were anxious, just the reason you were there. Your flight would leave early next morning, allowing you to sleep on the plane (“First class, Tony pays us well,” Pietro had insisted, in a sleep-deprived haze (it had been 3 A.M. after a rough mission), and who were you to deny him?). You would start your trip the minute you landed. 

No, you were anxious solely because you started to worry he didn’t want to go anymore. It seemed irrational, but it was the only thought bouncing around your head. Maybe you had been coming to his apartment too much, so he was avoiding you. Maybe he was out with another girl right now, having a one night thing before he was stuck on vacation with you for a week. 

And that thought is what did it in for you. 

He hadn’t necessarily even done anything for him to make you feel this way, and you knew that. You knew it was all in your head, a product of the continuous discarding of you in the past by others. How they would use you as a status symbol, wanting the notoriety of having a girlfriend, the prestige of being with someone so gorgeous and intelligent, and then when they realized you wouldn’t put out, they would leave, or cheat, or slowly distance themselves until you couldn’t handle the lack of reciprocation and broke it off. 

You didn’t want to be hurt that deeply again. Losing your best friend because he knew you were in love with him and didn’t feel the same. Wanda had to have said something to him by now, right? (Wrong, but you didn’t know that at the time. Wanda protected your secrets with her life.). 

Consumed with nauseating dread, you grabbed your bags and anything else you had left there (a few jackets and t-shirts) and quickly locked the door behind you, heading to your car. 

~

You hadn’t been driving for too long, New York traffic impeding your progress. It was fairly late in the evening, so you felt that it was even worse. You just wanted to get out of there, maybe even just pack up and leave, start over somewhere else, get a new job. But you knew you were being unreasonable, you just wanted to clear your head before you explained yourself to Pietro.

You’re just coming to a stop again when you jolt at the sound of your phone ringtone blaring through your car’s bluetooth. You already know who it is, but are hesitant to answer. You take a deep breath and click ‘accept.’  

“Where are you?” he says, sounding out of breath. You want to just hold it in, just let yourself calm down, but the thing with Pietro is that he always knew just the way to get you to open up. And that’s what you did. 

“Look, I'm just overthinking right now and I think I just need to go home and not do this vacation.” 

“What are you overthinking about?” You hesitate again, but decide that you can’t keep doing this back and forth forever. 

“I can’t tell what you’re feeling. Sometimes I think you could like me back, other times it seems like you’re not interested in me anymore. I can’t tell what’s going on and it’s freaking me out and then you were late and I got worried that maybe you had someone else you were hanging around and liked them more and-”

“Just come back home. Please.” His voice is raw with emotion, like how he’ll sound sometimes when he’s getting worked up or near tears. You’ve only heard it a few times, but those few times made you know you didn’t ever want to hear it again. 

“I’m on my way, traffic’s being a bitch though.” That got a little chuckle out of him and you felt better, turning around the first moment you could. 

~

“Why did you leave?” He’s frantic but attempting (terribly) to hide it the minute you step in front of him. He had been waiting on the sidewalk out front for you. 

“I told you, I’m overthinking like crazy. It literally drove me insane.” You feel ashamed now, seeing how much he cared that you were missing. You wondered why you even began thinking that way to begin with. 

“Don’t you get it? How much more obvious can I be that I’m in love with you and only you? I mean I compliment you all the time, I kissed you on Halloween, I’m only touchy with you. If I’m gone or don’t respond it’s because I’m busy or overwhelmed, not because I’m ignoring you.” 

You freeze. Your fears begin to subside and you take a step towards him, suddenly he’s grabbing you by the waist and brushing your hair away from your face with both hands. He presses gentle kisses along the entirety of your face before gently placing a kiss on your lips, for the first time since that Halloween night.

For a moment, you forget that you’re outside. You forget that anything outside of you two exists. All you can focus on is the softness of his lips, how his hands rest gently on your face. 

~~

This was not how you were expecting to spend the day before your wedding. It was just a whim, one last little walk down memory lane before you were going to spend the rest of your life with the man that was walking beside you. You’re not sure why this made you nervous. 

“You’ve got a death grip on my hand, are you alright my love?” Pietro’s looking at you when you look up at him, biting your lip and loosening your grip a little.

“Yeah, just been nervous. Not sure why either.” He nods and soon you arrive at the door of the apartment. He had been preparing this as a surprise for you for a while, and worked it out with the apartment company to visit momentarily. However, Pietro has never been one to keep secrets from you, and told you a few days ago when he got everything worked out. 

When you step foot into the apartment, you’re hit with a wave of nostalgia, thinking back to every type of memory you two had here. 

How he had brought you up after his confession and slow-danced with you in the kitchen with the lights dimmed. 

Your first major argument where you went and sobbed on his balcony, and how he almost immediately folded and held you after, apologizing profusely.

Stumbling around his apartment drunkenly during a party he had thrown, looking for him. He found you, far more sober than you were, and immediately led you to grab water. You started crying because of your confusion due to your drunken state and he held you close before making you lie down in his room, ending the party slightly earlier than planned so that you could rest. 

You turn to him and you can tell he’s deep in thought with how quiet he’s gone, staring at the bare apartment around you both. 

“Do you think the mark from where Bucky accidentally bumped into the wall is still there?” You let go of Pietro’s hand momentarily and head to the doorway of the kitchen, eyes glancing over the wall. You wave him over and he’s there immediately, and you point out the small dent that many could easily overlook. 

He places a hand on your back and you realize then that tomorrow will be the start of the greatest chapter of your life. 

#pietro maximoff x reader #pietro maximoff #quicksilver x reader #quicksilver #mcu #marvel mcu #marvel #fanfic #fluff

[foxes-that-run]

What do you think about the way she seemed during cornelia st at the end of Aug? To me she looked emotional. This was when she had already started communicating with TK.

With the timing of TR too, it's all speculation but wonder if HS made a choice around that time. We'll probably never really know what went down.

Taylor was really emotional in Mexico and played a lot of Haylor songs. No way to know, as you say Cornelia St was the date that Harry went to TR's play and there were quite a bit of coverage about that. His Pick You Up leaked on the 31st too.

Thanks @cntfightmydemonsthyknowhowtoswim for this list she posted the other day:

24/8 - Playing "I Forgot You Existed" and making the crowd green? 👀 [Lover songs are usually a light pink colour]

25/8 - Snow On The Beach

26/8 - Played Cornelia St & YOYOK. (wearing green) Very emotional in Cornelia St (Looks like she's crying mid song?)

27/8 - Played Afterglow & Maroon. Very emotional in both. She does tend to play Maroon all up in her feelings though. But similar to Cornelia St, looks like she's crying mid song in Afterglow as well.

I think she would be emotional playing Cornelia Street anytime, it's only the second time it's been played. @cntfightmydemonsthyknowhowtoswim has a post about Cornelia Street. here:

Taylor rented Cornelia Street in June 2016. Not counting time before she said the "Summer was an Apocalypse" on 29 August, or when she was in Nashville writing Reputation, Cornelia St seemingly happened in late September or October.

Harry disappeared in LA 2 September. In that time it was announced Hendall was over. Then the 29 September 2016 anniversary the Another Man Mix Tape and articles. (She repaid this with a 70 song "Taylor Loves" Spotify playlist on 28 September 2017.) He reappeared in London 12 October, just before he went to Jamaica to record HS1.

Joe was in London till 4 October and was first seen in NY on the 12th at the Kings of Leon/Bowery. In November, Taylor then went to Asia and was based in London by the end of the year.

I think Cornelia St could go either way, though there is only 2 weeks Joe could have spent there and he appeared when Harry left......

[corrodedcoffins-blog]

The Trip To Cornelia Street

main masterlist

spencer reid x famous!reader universe

word count: 1.5 k

warnings: slut-shaming? i think thats all

Being away from Spencer was hard, especially when they had just spent a week together. But now they were both in New York, Spencer here on a case and Y/N staying at her rented place on Cornelia Street. Sadly though, being as Spencer was here for a case she didn’t know exactly when he would get off and be able to come see her. So Y/N had gone to a bar, wanting to see her girl friends. But god, she couldn’t have picked a worse time.

Y/N phone would not stop going off in the back pocket of her jean shorts, grabbing it to turn off her notifications, she sees messages from some of her friends that weren’t with her now, asking if she was okay? Why would she not be okay? Y/N takes a step towards the bar to sit and check twitter. One of the biggest mistakes people make everyday. 

Kim Kardashian had posted an altered video of Y/N saying she approved the lyrics. God it felt as if Y/N world had come crumbling down, some of things people were saying. Calling her a liar, and playing the victim card. The bar suddening started getting hotter, felt like it was closing in on her.

Y/N called her car, after she got out of the bar her fresh air. She then sent her friends, who are still in the establishment, a text saying she was leaving and that they should stay and have fun. She didn’t want to ruin her friends' nights. 

Her car arrives, not leaving her waiting long. Sitting in the backseat of the car, her mom texting and trying to call, all Y/N wants to do, the only person she wants to talk to is Spencer. She knows he was on a case, but it was very much possible that tey had finished the case. They had been on it for four days. Maybe it was her emotional state or the few drinks she had in her, but nonetheless Y/N called Spencer. Miraculously Spencer answered after the third ring.

“Hey, baby.” His voice was soft, yet raspy at the same time. He must had been just going to sleep.

“Hey.” Y/N’s voice breaking as she speaks, it was at this moment she realised she was crying. 

Spencer on the other line, sitting up in bed at the tone in her voice asking, “Baby, are you okay? What's wrong?”

She said “I’m fine.” but they both knew it wasn’t true.

“I know you’re not fine. What happened?”

“They hate me.” Her voice breaks again.

“Who-who hates you?”

“Everyone. You remember- of course you remember.. I told you about the lyrics in Kanye’s song about me?” She waits to hear him mumble a quick ‘mhm’ before continuing, “And when Kim s-said that I knew about the lyrics, well she… She posted an altered video that sounds like I agreed. And now everyone hates me. Y/N L/N is over party is trending worldwide. They hate me.” Y/N says struggling, having to pause a couple times to wipe tears or sniffle 

“Love, where are you?”

“You can’t come, you have a case.”

“No, not anymore we solved it. Where are you?”

“I-I’m uh in my car.. Going to my place on Cornelia Street.”

“Okay I’ll meet you there. I love you.”

“I love you too.”

-

At this point Spencer had calmed Y/N down enough, with a bath, and sweet cuddles, mixed with even sweeter kisses. Spencer had asked for a few days off to help take care of Y/N, Hotch gladly let him, knowing Spencer wouldn’t ask unless it truly was important. 

It was now the next day. Whenever Y/N was with Spencer he hadn’t let her on social media, but with Spencer in the shower there was sadly no one there to stop her. Y/N reading tweet after tweet with the hashtag Y/N L/N is over party. Tweets saying she was a liar, always been a bitch, and a slut. Someone saying she’s a mess, and that her new hot boyfriend should get out now, that she didn’t deserve anyone. Y/N couldn’t help but agree, she never thought she deserved Spencer and now with someone else saying it and thousands agreeing, it clearly had some truth. But the worst came when someone replied with a picture of Spencer hugging another girl. No one she recognized, it surely wasn’t any of the women on his team.

Was he just leading her on, did he love someone else? She trusted him, she thought he was worth trusting. 

Y/N was in an emotional, and irrational state, there was no logic to her next move, of leaving the rented house, without saying goodbye to Spencer. She quickly packed her bag, while Spencer was still in the shower, then she left. Not leaving a note, just leaving. 

-

Spencer walked out of the bathroom with a towel around his waist, walking towards his and Y/N’s shared bedroom. Seeing the room in a dishevelled state, one of Y/N’s suitcases, and quite a bit of her clothes gone. Spencer immediately calls Y/N, pacing around the bedroom as he lets the phone ring several times, Y/N not answering. Spencer decides to get dressed while he continues to call. Placing the phone on the bed, on speaker, slipping his pants on, buttoning the buttons of his shirt. Spencer was borderline ready to call the team, worried out of his mind. Until Y/N had finally picked up.  

“What do you want, Spencer?” Y/N asked harshly, she never spoke to him in this tone. And never calls him by his full name. It’s also Spence, or baby, or his favourite my love, never Spencer.

“Where are you? Where did you go- why did you go?”

“I saw the pictures of you and that woman, Spencer.”

Once again with her tone, it told Spencer that she was not in the least bit joking. Yet he had no idea what she was talking about. Him and another woman? Anyone would be stupid to do that to a woman like Y/N, and Spencer is provably a genius. Not to mention that he had no idea how he got Y/N to go out with him, he couldn’t do it again if he tried. 

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, baby.” Hearing him call her ‘baby’ caused a tear to drip out of her eye, not being able to handle it, not being able to handle the idea of losing him. 

“Spencer. I saw the picture of you with a red head, you were hugging her. Your hands were on her waist.”

At that Spencer had finally registered what she was talking about. He had seen the cameras yesterday, taking pictures of him while he was getting victims of the serial arsonist they were dealing with. The woman in question he was hugging, her son hadn’t existed the building yet. Spencer comforting and holding her so she didn’t run into the building herself. 

“Y/N no- please come back so I can explain. And I do have an explanation.”

“I want to hear it then.” 

“Okay.. That woman was a victim of a serial arsonist and her son wasn’t out of the building yet. I was holding her back from running inside. I didn’t tell you, because I know you don’t like to hear about the bad side of my job. I’m sorry, I should have told you when I saw people taking pictures, so this didn’t happen.”

Boy, did Y/N feel stupid, with all her past relationships it seems she always expects the worst. But Spencer wasn’t like all the other guys she’s dated he was better, kinder, gentler, definitely smarter, yet she still expects the worst in him.

“Spence, I’m so sorry.”

“No. You don’t have to be sorry, I didn’t tell you.”

“You shouldn’t have to tell me every time you comfort a victim, that’s your job. And I promise I won’t run away like this again, I’ll talk to you first.”

“Okay, are you coming back then?” Spencer’s voice sounded small when he asked, like he wasn’t sure if Y/N needed more time. It made Y/N smile, he was so god damn adorable, and she loved every bit of him.

“Yeah, I’m turning around now. I love you.”

“I love you too, Sweetheart.”

-

The next few days were spent at the Cornelia Street house, cuddled together on the couch, each taking turns picking movies to watch. Which caused weird combinations like the 2002 ‘Solaris’ movie, Spencer had gone on and on about the original being a 5-hour long movie in Russian, not that Y/N minded, she always loved listening to Spencer talk about topics he knew a lot about, which happens to be almost any topic she could think of. ‘Solaris’ was followed by ‘Mean Girls’ which was quite a culture shock for Spencer.

They spent the night in the secret oasis of their bed, sharing sweet kisses, and gentle touches. It was a good escape for Y/N given all that was going on with her name at the moment. Spencer was a great escape for her.

#spencer #reid #spencer reid #spencer reid fic #spencer reid x famous!reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x singer!reader #dr spencer reid #spencer reid headcanon #spencer reid x you

[deathofpeaceofmiiind]

high infidelity | twenty one

"I rent a place on Cornelia Street", I say casually in the car. We were a fresh page on the desk, filling in the blanks as we go. As if the street lights pointed in an arrowhead leading us home

*Ellie's POV* A few days later…

I was finally back up in Vancouver and with Liam, I missed him so much and being with him gave me a sense of stability. Tyler put the house up for sale and it sold on the same day which was incredibly lucky but very normal for Vancouver real estate. Liam and I have just been staying with my dad for the time being, which my dad enjoyed. Danielle even found me a condo and I was getting ready to move into it already. I had to admit this transition period in my life was going a lot easier than I expected. I had such an incredible support system that made it even better.

“I can’t believe this place is mine.” I mused as I walked around my new home. It was right in the heart of Vancouver, bright open layout, lots of windows, a large patio, and even better it had three bedrooms so Liam could have his own space and I could still have a guest room. Danielle looked over at me at smiled, “It’s all yours babe, time for a fresh start.” “Absolutely.” I mused, still not believing I was finally out of that house and didn’t have to walk on eggshells. I could decorate it the way I wanted, adopt a cat if I wanted, put my Christmas tree up early without someone bitching in my ear. Hell I could drink wine and dance around naked if I wanted to. “When does the furniture arrive?” “Tomorrow.” I had taken some of my money from the house selling to get new furniture, cause I wanted nothing from the house in here besides Liams room. Danielle and I were gonna mirror it to his old room to help him with the transition. “It was nice of them to leave this couch.” “This couch is fucking sick.” Danielle agreed, it was a giant cloud couch that almost wrapped around the whole living room. I couldn’t wait to have Noah and the guys up here to hang out and have family dinners or even football Sunday’s with them. I went to check on Liam, but as soon as I did my phone buzzed, it was a text from Noah. “Special delivery at your front door.” I raised my eyebrow and walked towards the door. My footsteps felt heavy the closer I got, I checked the peephole, but he wasn’t on the other side of the door. Filled with confusion I swung the door open and saw a giant bouquet of ivory roses. My heart skipped a beat, they were my favourite. How did he know?

I grabbed my phone and face-timed Noah, he answered and saw me with the flowers,“Congratulations on your new home baby.”

I blushed as I stared at the screen, he was sitting in his home studio as his favourite Naruto hoodie hugged his body. “Thank you these are gorgeous.” “I thought you deserved a house warming gift.” “I’ll never say no to flowers. Are you happy to be home?” I replied as I sat down on the floor in my empty bedroom, completely consumed by Noah’s voice. Funny how a few short years ago I found comfort in his voice on Twitch and now he’s FaceTiming me daily, it was something out of a teenage dream. “I am.” He replied as he scanned his room. “It’s just missing something.” Rolling my eyes, already knowing the answer, “hmm, what could that be?” “You, obviously.” His smile faded and turned into a small pout, “I miss you so much, Ellie.” My heart sunk as it hit me that he really wasn’t here with me, but he was in another country. At least we were in the same timezone but it still wasn’t enough. “I miss you too, Noah.” “I actually have a question for you.” He started. “We upgraded to a bigger venue tomorrow and the remaining tickets sold out quickly so we added a second show the night after. I was wondering, if you’re able, do you want to come down for the second show?” “I’d love to Noah.” A smile appearing on my face, “I want to see what your life is like down there. Only thing is, I’d have to fly down the day of the show. Liam goes back to his dad’s tomorrow after dinner.” He smiles at me through the screen, “Works for me.” “I can’t wait to see you.” I stopped myself, every cell in my body wanted me to tell him I loved him. I wanted to tell him, but over the phone just didn’t seem right. “I can’t wait to see you either.” He was cut off by his doorbell ringing. “What are your plans tonight?” “Inhale this ramen that just arrived and watch more Demon Slayer.” His dark eyes burned a whole into my heart as he looked at me, “Isn’t your boyfriend so exciting?” “Very.” I chuckled. “I can’t wait to see you.” “Once this tour’s over I’m coming up to stay with you with no interruptions okay? I gotta go though, Jesse might steal my food.” He replied, referring to his roommate Jesse Cash, who was also in a band called Erra. Noah started to walk out his room and I could hear him yelling at Jesse to not go to the door. Jesse told him to get fucked and went anyway. “Goodnight babe.” I hung up and I just sat there, feeling tears in my eyes. How can I have so much going for me but I feel deflated? I didn’t want to feel like this. I didn’t want to be this attached to him this fast but he made it impossible, especially with how he’s been so devoted to me. This felt like the cruelest way to fall in love, but I knew it was something I would have get used to with his career. “Mama?” I looked up, Liam walked into the room and towards the flowers. I smiled at him as I wiped the tears from my eyes, he caught me and walked over to me. It amazed me that even at his age he felt my sadness and wanted to make me feel better. He crawled onto my lap and hugged me, putting his head on my shoulder. I held him close to me as I felt more tears escaped my eyes. It can only get easier from here…right?

#fanfic #bad omens #noah sebastian