#i want tears | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

flying-thing · 3 months

Text

Kiss Me in the Rain

This is a SoapGhost fic for Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2. No one requested this, but my heart yearns for more angst, and as such, here we are. This is all based on the new Ghost skin in the war zone part of the game that I've never touched.

I'm not typing out Soap's accent.

..............................................................................................

Playlist:

Work Song - Hozier

My Love Mine All Mine - Mitski

So My Darling - Rachel Chinouriri

Atlantis - Seafret

Here With Me - D4vd

Romantic Homicide - D4vd

Dark Red - Steve Lacy

Advice - Alex G

The View Between Villages - Noah Kohan

..............................................................................................

CW: major character death, broken promises, gore, unreliable narrator, angst, domestic fluff, zombies

Word Count: 3457 (Unfinished and not edited!!)

-------------------------------------------------------

It was no surprise when Price told Simon and John that it was close to the time in which they needed more supplies. They were the scouts, after all, and it was their job to go scavenging. They still had a few days before they needed to leave, and as per usual, the two were enjoying their time together until they needed to leave.

Simon walked out to the garden the team had started a few days ago, and he found John watering the plants. It was a lot easier for sprouts to come out when there weren't birds and squirrels to steal the seeds from the soil. It has become oddly peaceful since the outbreak, nobody to disturb your slumber, no wars to fight, and barely anything to worry about. Recently, the 141 have been looking for any type of farm animal so that they can fully sustain themselves without needing to leave every month or so for supplies. Everyone has taken to reading books, whether it be to pass the time or to learn how to do certain things. Price has figured out how to build buildings— after some much needed practice. Gaz has learned to make soap and cook delightful food (when there was actual food to cook), and Soap has put his demolition skills to good use in that he can make things that create electricity and even plumbing. Simon has become very interested in gardening, interestingly enough.

Everyone had a place, and the routine worked. The rest of the world was plagued, but here in their little home? It was perfect. Most of the soldiers left when the outbreak happened so they could protect their families. The rest died when the undead broke in. Simon wonders sometimes what it would be like to be dead. He fantasized about it a lot when he was younger, but now that there was little to live for, life was everything to him.

Before he got too lost in his thoughts, John walked over to him. "What's happening in that brain of yours, Simon?" He asks. Simon snaps out of whatever trance held him, and he shook his head. "I don't know how to explain it, but it's nothing exciting. What are you doing out here?" He counters, earning a grin from the scot's face.

"Just trying to find out why you enjoy this so much, and I think I've just about figured it out."

Simon looks at him amused. "And what is the reason?"

"I said 'just about,' not completely," he jokes, making Simon laugh. He did that more often now that he barely wore a mask anymore. John was fascinated with how expressive he was. Crow's feet at the corners of his eyes, the barely-there blush on his cheeks, the corners of his mouth lifting. Apparently, when he called Simon gorgeous in his mind, he said it outloud, and it made the taller man smile more.

"You flatter me too much, Johnny. Do you want to know the reason I enjoy it?"

"Would you tell me if I said yes?"

"Probably not."

John scoffed playfully and shook his head, his eyes closed with the gesture. "Has Gaz made dinner yet?"

"He's about to, I think. He's excited for everything to start growing so we don't need to live off unseasoned and almost expired canned food."

"I'm in the same boat with him. Cannot stand what we're surviving off. Beggars can't be choosers, I suppose." John said solemnly.

Simon quirked an eyebrow. "Did you learn that phrase from Price?"

The comment earned him a punch to the shoulder, and Simon just chuckled again. "I've been around you English folk longer than you think, bastard." His words held no venom, and Simon rolled his eyes. "Thanks for watering everything, even if you didn't find answers to your questions."

John looked up at him and nodded. "I'm glad you found something you enjoy. I don't need to understand it."

It was always a change of pace from when Simon was tearing himself apart to find out the answers to unspoken questions he had about himself to John wholeheartedly accepting him, no questions asked. He'd slowly started adopting the mindset of not needing to know everything for there to be understanding. Johnny really rubbed off on him, he supposed.

"Price wants us to leave tomorrow. We need more food and blankets. Winter might be harsh, and we still don't have a heater that works," Simon said, changing the subject.

The shorter man nodded before chuckling. "Can you imagine us bringing back mattresses? That'd be feat."

"We would probably need to bring the four of us for proper backup. There's a mattress store in the mall we go into sometimes," Simon said. John thought for a moment before nodding his head. "Project for another day."

---

Simon got his and John's clothes while the latter got the shower ready. The routine was comforting for Simon after their 'normal' was all discombobulated. He had folded the clothes as neatly as he could before walking into the shared restroom that was slowly fogging up the broken mirror. He set the clothes on top of the closed toilet seat and made sure their towels were still where they were supposed to be.

"The water's just how you like it, Si," Johnny said, peaking his head out of the curtain. He had always looked at him like he was the most precious thing he'd ever seen, and it was sometimes overwhelming for Simon. He didn't deserve this. But he had it, and so he would enjoy it until the world decided it was time to tear them apart.

Simon only smiled as he undressed and put his clothes next to the pile Johnny had already made before getting inside the shower with him. John made room for Simon to feel the warmth of the water. His eyes closed for a moment as he basked in it. When his eyes opened, Johnny had some of the homemade shampoo in his hand and Simon leaned down so he could wash his hair.

Soft moments like this made him feel all warm inside, and he never could resist melting into his lover's hands when he'd held him. They took their time in washing each other, not wanting to waste a single moment together. The water was still hot when they finished and they dried off and got dressed. They spent the time in a comfortable silence, both having acknowledged that no words needed to be shared.

After they climbed into bed, Simon wrapped himself around John. He wanted to tell him about the feeling of dread he felt but got lost to the sound of John's heartbeat. John rubbed Simon's shoulder with his thumb as they laid there.

"I have a bad feeling about tomorrow," Simon said. John hummed. "Do you know why?"

Simon shook his head. "Just feels like something is going to go wrong."

"We haven't had an incident in a while. We cleared out most of the hoard that went through the city," John said, trying to clear the other's worries.

"Maybe that's the problem," Simon said. He'd never been scared to go out on a mission. The zombies were no more a threat to him than a soldier would have been. A little less if he thought about it.

"Promise me you'll be the one to kill me if I get bitten."

"What are you talking about? You're not going to get eaten. Stop talking like that," John said.

"Johnny, I need you to promise me. I don't know what I'd do if I was the one who hurt you in the end," Simon says, sitting up to look at him.

"I will protect you, Simon. I promise that if push comes to shove, I'll kill you. I'm not going to lose you to a damn biter though, you hear?" John said, pulling Simon in for a light kiss.

John sat up with him and cradled Simon's face in his hands, his thumbs gently wiping away tears that Simon hadn't even realized were falling.

"Don't cry, my love. It's okay."

"I don't understand why I'm so upset," Simon said. "But I just can't stand the thought of hurting you. You're so dear to me."

"Don't get too sappy on me," John chuckled, trying to lighten the mood. "I love you, Simon."

"I love you too, Johnny."

John's eyes widened, and Simon didn't think he'd ever seen his face get so bright.

"Well, you can't die now. Not when you're finding your voice. I'm so proud of you, Simon."

"It's all because of you."

---

Beep beep be- click.

John clicked off the alarm clock with a sigh. He sat up and rubbed his face before turning to look at Simon sleeping peacefully. His light brown hair is laid across the pillow, and his mouth is slightly agape. His hair had gotten longer as he had not cut it in a while. It looked so soft and John couldn't help but carefully run his fingers through the other's locks. The action woke him up and he opened his glossy eyes to see that it was only Johnny there.

"Good morning," he said, his voice gravelly with sleep. "Morning," the other responded. John removed his hand and allowed Simon to do a full body stretch and yawn before sitting up as well. He leaned on John's shoulder, his cheek smushing up against it.

"You're like a cat, Simon. It's sweet," John said endearingly.

"I blame you for making me soft, Johnny," Simon mumbled, making him chuckle.

"We should get up soon. Gaz ought to be making breakfast by now."

"Let me go to the bathroom first," Simon said, getting up and stretching again, yawning as he scratches his stomach.

John followed behind him and then to the cafeteria after, sure enough hearing Gaz making noise in the kitchen.

They walked up to the window in the wall and watched the man do his thing. "Good morning, Gaz," John says loudly so he hears him. He looked over and grinned. "Morning, boys. How'd you sleep?"

"I slept well enough. Simon's still waking up, if you couldn't tell," John answered. Gaz nodded.

"Breakfast is almost done, if you two want to sit down. I'll bring it out to you."

"Make enough for me too," Price said, his voice carrying through the room. Gaz rolled his eyes. "No, I think I'll let you make your own food," he said sarcastically. It made Simon laugh and he covered his mouth with one of his hands.

"Don't think you'd want me messing up your space. You'd probably kill me if I set the kitchen on fire."

"Damn right, I would."

They all laugh and after a couple minutes, Gaz walked out with two trays with two plates on each tray. He sat them down on the table they routinely sat at.

"I found a hen in the woods yesterday, so I went and grabbed it. I need you to make a pen for it," Gaz said to Price. The three of them grinned. "So we get eggs more often?" John asked, earning an excited nod.

"Yes!" John exclaimed, doing a little happy dance. Simon laughed and shook his head. "Eat your food. We should leave soon."

"Aye, you're right, but we still need a list of what we need to find. You're also not even dressed yet," John said amusedly. "Neither are you," Simon quipped.

John rolled his eyes and grinned, eating what was on his plate. The four of them conversated for a while even after they'd all finished their food. It was calm; exactly what Simon needed after stressing all last night.

When they finally got dressed, it was about noon. Simon slipped on his vest and grabbed his knives and backpack. He waited for John to finish putting his boots on before walking out to Price's office. John knocked, and Price called them in.

"I've got your list here. It's the normal stuff with a few additions," the older man said, looking between the two.

Simon nodded and took the list from Price's outstretched hand. He looked it over before handing it to John, who put it in his bag. "We'll be back in a couple days then," Simon said, putting on his mask.

"Be safe, boys. We'll be waiting for you."

"Of course, sir," John said, putting on a mask of his own. They walked out of the room and saw Gaz waiting for them at the door. He hugged both of them when they got close enough. "Don't get lost, got it? We'll come find you if you don't check in properly, so don't leave us hanging."

John grins and fist bumps the man, holding their fists together. "We'll come back. Don't miss us too much, yeah?" Gaz nodded and looked at Simon.

"I'll keep him kicking," he said with a grin. "Good man," Gaz responded, giving him a fist bump too. He opened the door and watched them head out and down the road.

"How long do you think we'll be out this time?" John asked, his head slightly elevated to look at the tops of the trees. Simon hummed in consideration. "Four days. Only because we have a lot to get and ground to cover."

"I'll say a week then. Factoring in anything potential issues," John said in consideration. Simon nodded, "Makes sense. I don't think we will though. It's been a while since we've seen so much as a group."

"Better safe than sorry, hm?" John said playfully. Simon chuckled and shook his head. "Learned that from Gaz? Picking up all sorts of things, I see."

"What do you expect? I'm around you guys all the time. Bound to happen," John said, amused.

"We'll be at the city soon. I can see it ahead," Simon said, changing the subject. Since they left so late, they wouldn't make it in daylight and would need to set up camp and get there the next day. Walking give miles takes longer than one would originally expect. They were pretty close by the time the moon was a quarter of the way up in the sky and decided to make their border so they could sleep.

Simon threaded three lines of barbed wire around the trees where their camp would be; one close to the ground, one about torso level, and one in front of his face. After that, he pushed leaves closer to the wire so it would be easier to hear if anything on through. John made a small upside down fire in the meantime, putting down their sleeping bags and using their bags as pillows.

"Did you remember the spoons, Johnny?" Simon asked as he watched him pull out a couple cans of food. John looked around as he thought about it before grimacing. "I'll take that as a no. Good thing I remembered for you," he said, pulling a couple out of his own bag.

"I can't go anywhere without you, Simon," John said playfully, knowing full well that he would forget his sleeping bag if Simon wasn't there to remind him or grab it for him. "I know," the other responded, handing him a spoon.

They ate in a comfortable silence and watched the fire. When they finished eating, Simon took the cans and put them in a spare bag he had brought, putting the spoons in with them to wash them when they got to the stream on their way back. They sat next to each other, their shoulders touching.

"We should sleep soon," Simon said as John leaned his head on his shoulder. "You won't sleep, so I won't either," John said in determination. Simon chuckled and shook his head. "Sleep, Johnny. I'll watch over you."

The man was already asleep, much to Simon's amusement. He never could stay up like Simon could. He fell asleep a little after, laying them both down to get comfortable. Simon layed on the sleeping bag while John was sprawled out on top of him, his head on his chest.

Simon woke up to rustling and at first thought it was John moving. He soon realized that he would have felt the man move and opened his eyes to see a walker fallen over the wire. It was quickly crawling towards them and Simon grabbed the knife from his side pocket and slipped out from under John. He met the zombie halfway and he stabbed into its ear. It was a clean kill, if he did say so himself. The sun was decently up and thought it would be good to get up and go before it was super bright. Sunglasses are hard to put on over the hard shell of a mask.

John woke up from the commotion and shot up when he saw the dead zombie slumped at Simon's feet, thinking it was still alive. "It's alright, Johnny. Took care of it," Simon said, easing John's worries. "We should go soon, so get ready to leave."

He nodded and stretched before getting up and taking deep breaths to calm his adrenaline. He always feared Simon would get bit protecting him. He rolled up the unused sleeping bags and put them away while Simon undid the wiring. They both took a whiz before continuing their trek to the city.

They took their knives out just in case something came at them. Every now and then, they would encounter a runner and they were the worst of them. John opened the makeshift fence they'd made to keep the area contained. Ammo had been exhausted at the beginning of the outbreak and they didn't have much left. As such, guns were rarely used.

They'd never found other survivors. It was hard to live in a world like this and not many had good survival instincts. It really was a wonder the military fell so soon when they were supposed to be trained for it. Oh well, Simon supposed. More resources for my group.

Closing the fence, they ventured further in. "What store should we hit first?" John asked, his eyes scanning the area in front of them. "Necessities first. Probably the chicken feed since the store is farther away. We can work our way to the front."

"Makes sense. It would keep us out here longer though. I don't remember where the store is exactly."

"Neither do I. But if we want eggs, we need to hope we find it quickly and that it's even there."

John nodded, and they kept walking. "We should stock up on toilet paper as well. Maybe grab a thing of water until we get the well pumping properly."

"Should get some for our vacation."

"While this isn't a vacation I would want, it's funny," Simon mused. John stifled a laugh.

They spent most of the day walking down the streets until it got dark enough that they would need to find a building. They found one without a bunch of broken windows and it looked secure enough. They went to the door and carefully opened it, hoping it didn't squeak too much.

The windows let in enough light that they could see well enough. Simon walked over to the wall and banged on it a few times. The door was still open in case a crowd came and they could easily leave. The downside was that the noise could have attracted some outside. It would do them no good to be cornered. When nothing came and no sound was made, John closed the door. They scouted the room and found nothing. The windows were stable and the door leading upstairs was barricaded. As long as they secured the door leading out and stayed out of sight, they would be just fine.

They were unable to make a fire, much to John's dismay, but they did have an electric lantern still. Price was able to fix a solar panel onto it and now they could test to see if it worked. Simon desperately hoped that it would work like this, although he would never admit it. He wanted to be able to see everything if anything happened. That would have been his explanation. The real reason, however, is that he wants to be able to watch John. He didn't know how much time they had left and he wanted to see as much of him as possible.

It's not creepy. It's endearing, Simon thought. How many times will I see him before our inevitable deaths?

He broke free from his slightly morbid thoughts after seeing John grin at him with his teeth showing. It meant that he was pleased. That's good. It was moments like this that made him feel the urge to commit whatever crime he needed to just to see him smile all the time. Not that there was any structure anymore, but his point still stood.

With confirmation that it works, they turned it off. No use in wasting electricity when there was still light outside.

"Hungry, Simon?" John asked as he rifled through his bag for food. Simon nodded when he looked at him. “These are so much better when they're hot, but here you go.”

24 notes · View notes

if-mirrormine · 2 years

Text

i'm not at all sorry for this one 🤪

nora finds demetri in the garage, his legs poking out from beneath his car and she smiles to herself when he hears him hiss and cuss. she steps further into the garage, coming to a stop in front of him and she softly taps her foot on top of his to get his attention.

"excuse me, sir?" she starts. "can you help me? i'm looking for my husband."

the sound of a metal tool hitting the floor echoes throughout the garage and a moment later, he slides out from the car, the wheels of the creeper squeaking slightly. shirtless and covered sweat and car oil, he grins at her. "you just missed him; he stepped out for a meeting."

"that’s too bad..." she pouts at him. "i had something really important to tell him."

"i can take a message if you'd like?" he climbs off the creeper and makes a show of walking across the garage to a work bench where a marker and handheld white board sit.

she steps closer to the car and leans her hip against the bonnet. "like i said; it's very important that he gets this message."

"as soon as i see him," he affirms with a wink before he picks up the whiteboard with one, the marker with the other, pulls the cap off with his teeth and gestures for her to speak.

she clears her throat and speaks slow, punctuating each word as she says them to make sure he hears them clearly. "i am pregnant."

she watches him begin to write 'nora is' with a look of intense concentration on his face before he stops. he slowly looks up at her, his eyes widening. "you're..."

she smiles at him. "you heard me."

before she has time to react, he's dropped both the board and marker, and closed the distance between them to sweep her into his arms. he lifts her off the ground and spins her around, the sound of her laughter filling his ears.

"i'm gonna be a dad!" he cheers and she laughs again at his reaction. he lowers her to the ground but keeps his arms around her.

"and i'm gonna be a mom," she says and as the words leave her lips, the amused expression own her face morphs into one of horror. "oh god, i'm gonna be a mom!"

he leans to pepper her face in kisses. "you're gonna be the best mom this world has ever seen."

she rolls her eyes at him but her smile slowly returns. "you have to say that."

between a kiss on her cheek and kiss on her temple, he mutters out a defiant, "nuh uh."

"and what makes you so sure?"

"well, you're already the best wife this world has ever seen."

"i'm not sure those skills translate. try again."

"what about that pot plant we had? you kept it alive for a good six months at least."

"we should probably aim to keep our child alive a lot longer than that, demi," she chuckles. "what else have you got?"

he pulls back slightly to grin at her. "now you're just fishing, dear wife of mine."

"maybe a little," she says, glancing up at him with a shy smile.

"trust me, doll; you are gonna be such a perfect mom, our kid isn't gonna know what hit 'em!"

she arches an eyebrow at him and taps her fingers against his chest. "how are you so confident about this?"

he rolls his eyes at her as if that's the dumbest question she could've asked him. "because we're amazing," he scoffs. "and because i have a faith in us; i have faith in you." his face suddenly lights up like a kid on christmas morning. "let me show you just how much."

he tries to lean down and kiss her when she laughs and pushes his face away. "shower first!" she slips out of his grasp then and darts for the door. "you absolutely reek, renfield!"

he stands for a moment, his mind processing last few moments before he dashes after her, a grin on his face.

"i'm gonna sue."

nora rolls her eyes as she continues flipping through her magazine. "don't be so melodramatic," she says, skimming over some article about a new movie. "the doctor said i'm fine." she briefly glances up at demetri, where he paces at the foot of her hospital bed. "will you sit down? you're giving me a headache."

he mutters an apology before hurrying to sit in the chair next to her. out the corner of her eye, she watches him bounce his leg - violently almost - and she rolls her eyes again.

"i just think she should be here doing something," he huffs. "not flitting about the hospital doing god knows what."

"she can't do anything until i'm fully dilated," she replies, her voice monotone. "i thought you passed sex ed."

"i can't help that i'm stressed," he says with another huff. "you're my wife, doll; i don't want you to be in pain."

"and yet you knocked me up anyway," she deadpans as she flips the page.

he pauses and for a moment, she relishes in the silence before he speaks again. "i'm not gonna take that personally because i know this isn't easy for you."

"whoopee..."

he stands up suddenly and she glances at him, vaguely alarmed at the hopeful look his face. "what can i do, doll?"

"about what?"

"to make this easier for you."

"you can sit back down and stop talking."

he gives her a flat look. "i'm being serious, nora."

"so am i." when he doesn't budge, she heaves a sigh and sets her magazine down. "fine; i want you to go home and bring back that stuffed dinosaur you put in the nursery."

at that, he frowns. "i don't see how that could help -"

"who's having a baby here?" she says, glaring at him. "you or me?"

he holds his hands up. "dinosaur, got it."

she smiles sweetly at him and he's only slightly concerned at his wife's abilities to switch between demeanours. "good... and i don't want to see you for another half hour at least." he opens his mouth to object but she cuts him off. "the doctor said we'll be here for hours before the baby gets here."

he nods, unconvinced. "okay, but no longer than that."

she rolls her eyes and begins to reply when she gasps, her hands going to her belly as she's overcome by a contraction. before he can move to comfort her however, she points to the door. "go!"

demetri tears through the house looking for that dinosaur. he was certain he'd placed it on the dresser in the nursery but when he finds it stuffed in the inner bowels of the cabinet under the kitchen sink, he knows nora hid it for this exact purpose.

admittedly, he took longer than she'd asked, arriving back at the hospital after his grueling fifty minute search.

but when he arrives at her room and sees the sleeping baby bundled in her arms, the dinosaur becomes the least of his worries.

"what the fuck, nora," he says as he rushes to her side, depositing the stuffed toy on the chair. "you said we had time!"

she avoids his eyes and shrugs. "i severely overestimated how long this would take."

"why didn't you call me?" he asks, pouting as he sits on the edge of the bed.

she looks up at him finally with tired eyes. "i'm sorry; i was little busy, demetri."

"sorry, doll," he says quietly before he looks at the baby - their baby! - and a small smile touches his lips. "can... can i hold them?"

immediately, all her annoyance at him flies out the window and her face softens. "of course."

she gently places them in his awaiting arms and he stares down at them wonder. demetri thought that he'd never be able to love anything more than he loves nora but as he holds his sleeping child in his arms, he now knows that to be wrong.

he looks up at his wife to find her watching him, a tired smile on her face. "you're amazing, doll," he says softly. "look at what you did; all your own."

"not entirely; you helped at the beginning."

he chuckles. "yeah but beyond that... you don't need me."

"of course i do," she scoffs. "who do you think i'm putting on diaper duty?"

"that all i'm good for, huh?"

"pretty much."

he shakes his head, smiling at her. "i love you, nora."

she smiles back. "i love you, demetri."

nora wakes with a start and reaches for demetri, only to find his side of the bed cold and empty. her eyes still heavy with sleep, she looks around the darkness of their bedroom and finds that empty as well.

with a sigh, she drags herself out of bed and out the bedroom. clad only in one of her husband's shirts and a pair of sleep shorts, she shivers slightly in the chill of late night, early morning as she shuffles down the passage. her feet carry her to the nursery, the soft glow of the night light pouring through the crack in the door, and she peeks inside.

demetri sits in the rocking chair in the corner, rocking softly as he stares at the sleeping bundle in his arms in awe. after a moment, she realises he's singing softly to them and a moment after that, she realises what song.

sex on fire by kings of leon.

she smiles and pushes open the door to enter. "a little inappropriate for an infant, don't you think?"

he pauses mid chorus and looks up at her, a smile of his own forming on his face. "i tried keeping it pg, i swear."

she hums. "i bet."

he carefully adjusts the baby in his arms and makes room for her to sit on his lap. she rests her head on his shoulder and together they stare at their child in wonder.

"can't sleep?" she asks after a while.

"i don't know," he says honestly. "i just can't stop looking at them. is that vain? because they're half of me?"

"no." she kisses his cheek. "i like looking at them too."

he smiles at her. "we made a cute baby."

she grins back. "my half is cuter."

"you know what? i think i agree."

she playfully hits his chest. "suck up."

"jokes on you, nora; i did all the sucking up i needed to years ago! you've already married me and had my baby, you're stuck with me now."

"forever?"

"and ever," he adds, nodding resolutely.

with a smile planted firmly on her lips, she looks back at their baby and runs her fingers through the soft hair on their head. "what band's music do you plan on ruining our child's innocence with next?"

demetri beams. "i was thinking acdc... highway to hell?"

"you take the verse, i'll take the chorus?"

"sounds perfect."

callie is fast asleep in the car seat. mc sits next to them, their eyes on the window as they watch the world fly past. demetri's driving, the music's on low.

they spent the day at the theme park, the three of them. they went on every ride, filled up on junk food and even swung past the petting zoo. it's long after six o'clock but the sun shows no sign of setting any time soon.

despite the fun of the day, demetri's been tense since he woke up. he's nervous, fidgeting, he can't sit still even behind the steering wheel and it's obvious even to mc that something is wrong.

"dad?" they say quietly as they pull their eyes from the window.

"yes, love?" he says, clearing his throat as he glances at them in the rear view mirror.

"are you okay?"

he hesitates before answering. "i am." he reaches into the backseat to offer them his pinky finger. "pinky promise."

they reach up to wrap their pinky around his and he gives them a tight-lipped smile in the mirror. they let go after a moment and mc looks out the window once more. when they don't recognises their surroundings, they look back at him with a frown. "where are we going?"

he adjusts his grip on the steering wheel, tightening and loosening his fists before clearing his throat his again. "we're going to see grandma and grandpa." he meets their eyes, licks his lips. "you're excited to see them, right?"

they nod.

"good," he says softly, his eyes going back to the road. "good..."

the rest of the drive passes by in silence and even when they arrive, demetri says nothing; wordlessly carrying a sleepy callie out the car and holding mc's hand as they walk to the front door. he knocks and it opens a few moments later.

the elderly woman blinks in surprise. "demetri?" her eyes fall to mc and callie and she beams. "and you brought the kids; what a surprise!"

she ushers them inside and mc makes a beeline for grandpa, who sits at the dining table building a model aeroplane. he smiles a them as they hop into the seat next to him. "hey, kiddo," he says, his voice deep and gravelly. he holds up the plane for them to get a better look at it. "what do you think? better than the last one, huh?"

they nod eagerly and watch as he goes back to assembling it, happily listening to the old man's ramblings. in the background, they see demetri talking grandma and after a while she frowns but nods her head. he then passes callie to her and she turns to walk down the passage. he closes his eyes and stands there for a long moment, breathing deeply, before opening his eyes and making his way over to them.

"hey, dad," he says vacantly and the old man grunts in greeting, his entire focus on the model, whereas as demetri's looking at them. "come here for a moment, mc," he adds and they do as told.

they stand in front of him and he kneels on the ground. taking their face in his hands, he gives them a soft, yet uneasy, smile. "you know i love you very much, right?" they nod. "and you know i love callie just as much?" they nod again. he opens his mouth to continue but he stops himself, his eyes becoming glassy. "i want you to always remember that."

"i will," they promise.

"i have to go now," he says, taking a shaky breath. "there are some things i need to take care of."

"where are you going?" they ask.

he swallows. "far... far away."

"how long will you be gone?"

"i don't know, mc."

"will you come back soon?"

a tear finally slips down his cheek and they reach up to wipe it away. "sure," he says, his voice breaking slightly."

"why are you crying, dad?"

he attempts to give them a smile but it seems forced, even to them. "i'm just going to miss you and callie while i'm gone."

"okay," they say. "i'll miss you too."

at that, he pulls them into a hug and squeezes them tight against him. they remain like that for as long as demetri can bear before he's pulling away, kissing their forehead and getting to his feet. then, without a second look, he strides across the room and out the front door.

it's been three weeks and nora's spent every day in front of their living room window, watching, waiting. she hasn't heard from demetri and she knows she probably won't. the police said it's not a missing person's case; there's no sign of his phone, wallet, car keys, even some of his clothes.

no, the man left willingly.

a tug on her sleeves pulls her from the depths of her thoughts, from the pain and resentment crowding her chest, and she looks down to find callie staring up at her.

"what's wrong, cal?" she asks.

"mommy, i'm hungry," the six year old replies.

she nods, an okay leaving her tongue as she takes their hand and leads them to kitchen. she picks them up, setting them on the counter and they watch with fascination as she cuts up some fruit for them.

"mommy?" they say softly.

"yes, cal?" she asks as she puts all the fruit in a bowl.

"where's daddy?"

she pauses, diced strawberries still in hand as she thinks about the answer. "i don't know," she says softly, eventually and finishes plating the fruit. she hands them the bowl and a fork before kissing them on the forehead. "you'll see him soon."

it's a blatant lie but it's one she's been telling herself as well. the thought circulates her mind no matter how many times she tells herself it's not true.

callie eats in silence and she lets her eyes drift to the window above the sink. mc and grayson are in the backyard, playing on the swingset. the words echoe in her mind as she watches them, as loud as the day they were spoken and she feels her heart shatter.

you have me until the end of time.

#idk you do the math #im not a scientist #it got a bit iffy towards the end #but give me a break #its 3 am #and i dont have a solid grasp on the english language #when sleep deprived #but does anyone ever really #i want tears #and i want broken hearts #lets goo besties #mm: nora #mm: demetri #mirror mine

130 notes · View notes