#idk he fucks her in an abandoned hospital or something

[echowithpain]

idk if that was originally the plan with shannon. i remember reading an interview with one of the creators tim minear saying something along the lines of the audience didn't warm up to her because they couldn't forgive her for abandoning chris, so they decided to get rid of her character. (idk why they really needed to kill her to do that though! lol)

Hey Anon!✨️ (You're my first so you get a cookie 🍪)

I understand the audience not warming up to her...

But like...

Aren't the scripts already written??? 😂😂😂

Idk anything about screenwriting but I would assume they would have the scripts finished before the actors started, y'know... acting?

And I agree they really didn’t need to kill her to get rid of her, but that fact that she's in the show for 4 episodes before dying just makes me laugh 😂 She couldn't even make it to the end of the season she tripped at the finish line 🤣🤣🤣

Also since they did kill her, why do it randomly at the end of season 2 with a car accident instead of the beginning of season 3 with the tsunami? Chris even has nightmares about her drowning during it which is I guess how he learned to process she wasn't coming home. That honestly would've been better instead of... *points at mess* that

Eddie could've convinced her to let Chris spend the day with Buck to help him get out of bed, leading to Buck and Chris at the pier, so she can have a day to herself while he's busy at work. She agrees, says I love you to both of them, and is out of the show until episode 3 where Eddie either gets a call while at the makeshift hospital about his wife or he's reading the list of people at the morgue (assuring Bosko her captain's name isn't there) and comes across her name. But since it's busy and people are still coming in who need help, he pushes it aside, instead putting all of his focus on helping out and being glad Chris isn't near the disaster (😬) Then we get the scene with Buck wearing Chris' glasses and Eddie starts to process the fact he lost his wife AND child in a tsunami before seeing the lady carrying him in the jacket

Again, idk anything about screenwriting and we can't change the past (except with fanfiction!!!) but what we got and the context we got it in was funny. They spent literally half her time there fighting or fucking and the other half being sweet and sincere. Then it's:

"Eddie I'm not pregnant also I want a divorce" *dies literally the next scene we get with her* 😂😂😂

#911 on abc #911 abc #9 1 1 show #911 shannon #911 show #ask me anything #send asks #ask me stuff #911 #911 on fox #911 fox #911 chris #911 christopher #911 eddie #911 buck

[morsesnotes]

A little ramble about Joan and Morse...

[There will be spoilers if you haven't finished Endeavor]

A common take I've seen in this fandom is that Joan was waiting around for him. That Morse had all these chances he didn't take to express his feelings. So her shutting him down in S5/S6 was totally his own fault. I disagree with this and don't really understand it.

Here's why:

They only start getting to know each other properly in S2, and Morse has a girlfriend at that point.

Morse becomes aware of his feelings for Joan at the end of Coda, and he went to the Thursdays' house immediately after. It seemed like he intended to talk about it with Joan, but she was clearly traumatized, and not in a place to deal with romantic declarations. She'd already decided she was leaving. What if he said how much he cared and then she was gone? When you think about the abandonment issues this guy has, and the fact she is literally leaving him in that moment, can you blame him for being afraid?

Nevertheless, he's openly welling up in front of her (a very odd thing for a man in the mid-60s to do) and telling her if she needs anything to let him know. There's no way a woman wouldn't pick up on this. Not to mention constantly putting her life before his at the bank.

When Joan contacts him in the vaguest form possible, it's enough for him to do exactly what he said he would. He goes out of his way to find her and indicates there's something between them that can happen. He tells her he cares what happens to her and whether or not she's in his life. Joan makes him leave.

Morse proposes to her. She says no and specifically cites her dad as a reason it would be a bad idea. When the phone rings, Morse is willing to let it go. She's the one who picks it up, brings it to him, and leaves before he can do anything about it.

Even though he doesn't stay at the hospital, the Doctor presumably would've told her he stopped by.

When she moves back to Oxford, he gives her some space, which is entirely correct given what she's been through. He takes up her invitation to her party and makes sure he is there. He's clearly eager at the chance to spend time with her. But then she tells him she wants to set him up with someone else.

Eventually Morse can't take any more rejection, especially with Claudine having left him. He's gotten the message Joan was sending him and lets it go. This is when Joan decides to ask for a coffee. It's the first time she actually initiates something and given the context I think it's perfectly understandable for Morse to turn the offer down? It's fair enough if he doesn't want to get hurt again, isn't it? Idk, Joan's timing here rubbed me the wrong way. It was the mature thing for him to do and showed he saw her as more than a rebound.

Finally, a few weeks later Morse realizes in Icarus that life is too short and takes her up on it, but now she says she's sick of waiting around.

The fan reaction I saw with that moment was, "Yeah you tell him Joan! Fuck him!" And it made me go "???". It's true it wasn't the best timing on his part, but it's not as if he had a habit of turning up when it suited him. She was the one stringing him along, wanting his attention one minute and then rejecting it the next. She could've said she was busy and they could do it some other time in the week. Her reaction was way too harsh.

Don't get me wrong, I love Joan and am by no means the type to view Morse as a poor little Meow Meow who can do no wrong. However, I feel like it's super unfair to put it all on him when Joan was going through her own problems and has her own difficulties expressing herself. He gave her countless opportunities to open up, and she pushed him away. At a certain point, it'd be weird if he ignored her wishes and kept attempting to pursue her. It wouldn't be a good look if he tried stopping her from marrying his friend either. As far as he knows, she's moved on.

Morse may have had trouble saying it out loud, but his actions spoke volumes. Surely that counts for something? He also wrote her that incredibly romantic letter in Zenana and straight up said "Please believe me to have been yours, always". Keep in mind again this is a British man in the 60s-70s and the men around Joan so far have been deeply repressed. Seems pretty forward to me! I simply don't believe this wouldn't spark curiosity in Joan to figure out what he meant. That she'd just wait around until Morse came to visit her to ask about it, and that seeing him in the state he's in, she'd leave it there. This woman who wants passion, who's independent, who cares about the people in her life, who knows how it feels to be saving face while suffering inside, and her literal job involves helping children come to terms with their trauma. Her total passive behavior towards Morse doesn't make sense! Like it doesn't even have to be romantic! They can interact as friends!

He carries a ton of trauma and emotional baggage which makes him terrified of losing what he has with her. Not to mention his respect for Thursday. I don't see why we can't have empathy for both of them.

And yeah, he was being a dick in S6 but again, he's allowed to be angry and in fact it's healthy for him to actually let it out rather than having this idealized view of Joan forever or holding it in like he usually does.

Btw, with his previous behavior taken into account, him not showing up in Uniform was highly unusual and should've been a "What's happened to him?" moment for Joan. Not, "Classic Morse. Works comes first."

Anyway, sorry for the essay and thank you if you read all of it. I just wanted to get all my thoughts together in one place.

#endeavour #endeavour morse #joan thursday #morse x joan #itv endeavour #thinking thoughts

[blondiest]

good luck for the wip meme :3

hehehe thank you for the ask!! this one is matthalle in. to no one's fucking surprise. the universe of it's you and me, that's my whole world. because idk when ill finish this one im just gonna post most of what i have lol

Matt knows she's lucky to be alive.

She felt the blood seeping from her body, pooling on the pavement beneath her, felt the tight pain bloom in her chest whenever she tried to breathe, felt herself slipping from consciousness and thought— so this is it.

The doctors and nurses keep reminding her how lucky she is. She doesn't begrudge them that— they've taken good fucking care of her they've and been terribly patient with her piss-poor Japanese, her mediocre skills worsened by fatigue and all the drugs they have her on. Some of those drugs she's pretty sure they're not supposed to have— she wasn't allowed to bring Adderall into the country, so she'd be surprised if oxy was considered totally kosher— but she doesn't mention it. She appreciates not being in immense amounts of pain, and besides, her last comment on the laws here was met with a shower of bullets.

Come on, since when were the Japanese allowed to carry such big guns?

It's Matt's suspicion that she has Near's team to thank for her reduced suffering, and for the fact that she hasn't been dragged off to jail. Another thing she's fucking lucky for— luck, luck, more luck. Except after a few days of sitting alone in a cold, weird-smelling room, discomfort and isolation start to wear on her. Even the good shit only goes so far when it comes to managing pain, and she's got a good five gunshot wounds and a collapsed lung, and she's alone all day except when she has to shower, which is the one time she *wants* to be alone, and fuck, it gets harder and harder to stay grateful and not grouchy.

During the five days she spends in the hospital, Matt's irritability builds to something of a fever pitch. She gets exactly one visitor on day three, and it isn't even Mello or Near; it's one of Near's agents, a beefy blonde man who comes bearing a care package and gives his name as Rester. She jokingly asks if she can bum a cig, and he stiffly tells her he doesn't think smoking with a collapsed lung is wise. All further efforts at sparkling banter are promptly abandoned.

By the time she's finally deemed stable enough to discharge, Matt is itching to leave. The doctors take out her IV, give her instructions on how to proceed with her recovery, stick her in a wheelchair and tell her to wait. Her ride is meant to arrive soon, she's told.

So Matt waits. She waits ten, twenty, forty minutes, getting more and more pissed-off as the time ticks by. When the door to her room finally opens after almost an hour of waiting, she's full-on glowering, but the expression is instantaneously wiped out when she sees the woman in the doorway.

“You’re not the guy from before,” Matt blurts.

The woman smiles thinly, stepping forward and stooping slightly to offer her hand to Matt, who thankfully has the presence of mind to shake said hand instead of pressing her lips to the woman's knuckles like a fucking weirdo.

“Halle,” she says. “Forgive me for being late. Traffic was a mess.”

Matt had frankly already forgiven her the moment she walked through the door, and would forgive her in the span of a few seconds even if Halle reared back and kicked her in the stomach right now.

“Don't worry about it,” Matt manages. “I’m Matt.”

#matthalle #hallematt #my writing #asks

[wumiings]

You ever start making a post and then realize you need to be making a completely different post? Well this is that.

I know that many many people have already discussed the ways in which the lessons Merlin is taught by both Gaius and Kilgharrah (that [1] it’s his job to prove there can be Good Wizards and [2] a Good Wizard is defined by their willingness to maintain the status quo) fuck him up badly and lead to him preaching those same lessons at other righteously angry magic users

But I just get angrier and angrier the more I think about it because I’ve seen what that rhetoric does to people!! I’ve lived it!!

I remember the quiet shame my father (a black man) expressed when we talked about Will Smith hitting Chris Rock at the Oscars last year - the look on his face as he guiltily explained, “It’s not that I think it’s his responsibility to represent us all in front of the white folks exactly… it’s just that I wish that the first time someone struck someone else at this awards show, it hadn’t been a black man who did it.”

He knew on a logical level that a man’s actions (whatever you think of them) couldn’t be weighed morally on the basis of ‘how it makes us look,’ but he was raised to keep that idea constantly in mind: “Every time you step out of the house, you are representing your race to the world, so don’t do anything that reinforces negative stereotypes,” is one of the first lessons he remembers learning as a child.

And I do it too! Two years ago, my dad and I got pulled over while driving my (white) mom’s car downtown- one of her taillights was out or something idk- and for some reason her vehicle registration papers weren’t in the glove box that day. Naturally, dad and I were both freaking the fuck out, so I did exactly what all logic suggested was the safest thing to do:

[1] Emphasize that it was my mother’s car (hoping the clearly-skeptical cop would extrapolate her whiteness from the difference in my and my dad’s skin tones), [2] mention that my mom works at the local hospital, while my dad was out of town and would be Leaving Soon, [3] specifically refer to the fact that I’m a college student (educated and therefore Civilized according to the standards of the dominant class)

So, yeah, basically the message was “It’s okay, we are Assimilated! We have connections to Whiteness! And if you still don’t trust us, don’t worry, because we don’t intend to overstay our welcome in your community!”

And it fucking worked. We got out of there with a ticket and matching anxiety attacks, and my dad refused to drive my mom’s car again for the rest of his visit, and we were fine.

But we weren’t fine because we’d somehow- by playing the game- convinced the cop that black people weren’t as untrustworthy as he had been assuming. We did not leave him just a little less racist than he had been before. We were just (very tentatively) stamped “some of the good ones”.

That is what Gaius and (increasingly over time) Merlin spend the whole show doing. That is what Merlin tries to teach Gilli to do in “The Sorcerer’s Shadow”. And, hey, it’s a survival strategy! It isn’t unreasonable as a member of a minority group to try and keep yourself and your loved ones safe.

But what it isn’t is an action plan for systemic change. You cannot “one of the good ones” your way into a more equal world. It isn’t about getting enough cops knights to like you personally that they willingly abandon their prejudices and convince the head of government to change the laws.

“Maybe it’s your destiny to change that” my ass, Kilgharrah. It was a bullshit plan. It was always a bullshit plan, and Merlin’s initial instincts (seek out allies in similarly disadvantaged positions and then break the shit out of the law for them) were much more in line with the ‘Emrys, liberator of magic’ persona than any of the shit you and Gaius told him to do.

#bbc merlin #cw cops #cw racism #sorry for the rant #the funny thing abt this is that the original post was gonna be abt gwaine #whose name does not come up once anywhere in here #i was too distracted by the ever-simmering Rage™️

[inkyquince]

Inky you introduce me to new franchises every day. Never played a silent hill game, never watched any of the movies, but since you mentioned it.. I might as well right? Got to see if my brain can also make this horror game horny 🤝

OKAY OKAY OKAY LEMME JUST

so, okay, so while silent hill 2 is my favourite by far, you cannot lewd james sunderland. he's truly a depressy stressy. he's someone you wanna get wine drunk with except he's quit drinking. dont fuck him please, he'll feel guilty for thinking about mary during it

Now, please fuck pyramid head and the nurses. Pyramid head is so fucking sexual, mans WONT STOP humping shit in EVERY GODDAMN CUTSCENE. the second time you see him, HE'S MOANING and theres this wet fucking pull out sound when he throws a mannequin to the side. please... please, I KNOW he symbolizes James' guilt but goddamn, mister guilt can have this ass.

With the nurses? I am no better than a pervert. Boobies. Also there's something about the way they walk? Idk I just wanna write a noncon scene with a nurse finding a "patient".

OKAY, HENRY TOWNSEND. I like silent hill 4 so much, and henry is a quiet withdrawn lad. I know its meant to be that you're feeling more alone in the game but it just makes me think of Henry as a withdrawn quiet lad. Who has a fucking peephole in on his goddamn neighbour. I KNOW, its meant to check on her because YOU KNOW THERES WEIRD SHIT GOING ON, but i like to think about henry using that to justify it, being a nasty voyeur. Silent hill 4 has SO MANY MOMENTS where its just... fucking nasty.

SPEAKING OFF, THE BIG BAD OF SILENT HILL 4!

Walter Sullivan. He did kill two kids but dw he also killed 19 adults, so its not a freddy kreuger thing. ALSO HE JUST HAPPENED TO BE EXACTLY HOW I IMAGINED EDEN, MINUS THE BLOND HAIR.

He thinks a room is his mother because he was abandoned in it, he's got some UTTER mommy issues.

NOW HARRY MASON

So, Silent Hill 1 and Shattered Memory Icon. He's very polygonal in the first game but he's... Yeah, in Shattered Memories, he can have one ending where he's legit a manwhore. Like, HE'S SEEN HAVING A SEXTAPE OF HIS THREESOME. Cheating on his wife, being a whore and THE GAME CAN FULLY CALL YOU A PERVERT IN YOUR PSYCH PROFILE. This is the main reason I wanna play the game ngl. Also, during Cheryl's therapy session the therapist fully just tells you that ?? you have weird sexual views around your father no matter what?.. anyway.

Claudia and Vincent from Silent Hill 3 are fun, and you have a romantic stalker ghost thats obsessed with you called Stanley in the hospital.

Homecoming does not exist to me. Downpour is kinda fun but i dont really... end up thinking about it and Im about to play through origins.

SO PLEASE, PLEASE.

Silent Hill 2 is my favourite, its low on the jumpscares but its so high on the creepiness I WAS LEGIT JUST A BIG OLE DEER IN THE SPOTLIGHT THE ENTIRE GAME. But once youve played through it once, its downright... a comfort game? like im playing it when im taking breaks from silent hill 3. im trying to get through it in record time and im at the prison segment right now at 1 hour and 50 minutes. legit, i love it. Im on such a silent hill kick im down bad.

#ask #silent hill #please i love it #and i dont trust bloober with silent hill 2 remake #they're the idiots behind the blair witch game and the medium and like...? #their total moronic takes on mental health is probably going to impact the actual game yknow #which is about trauma #and i feel in my heart #theyre gonna mess it up #so legit just emulate the game

[whump-town]

As Fate Befell 

Another 5K fun time :) Idk if it's fun, I think it's fun

Chapter Three

“We could tell them he’s insane,” Sean offers quietly from the passenger seat. He’d been watching the side mirror for the right signs, proof that Aaron had actually fallen asleep. He was known to fake it every once in a while. But maybe that was another lifetime. Back then Haley would be the one whispering, spilling truths about Aaron that he only dared utter for her ears when she least expected it. And ones she only felt comfortable bringing up in a hospital. Under the guaranteed sedations of morphine hazes, when she knew Aaron wouldn’t hear. Then the things that she said could be denied but Aaron could never sleep in hospitals. Not then with Haley holding his hand then certainly not now, with no traces of her left. But she’d armed Sean with enough hard truths to use against Aaron now, proof of insanity. 

Having grown up with the man, Sean could think of plenty of things that could prove the very point he and Jessica could make. Aaron eats oatmeal for breakfast every morning. He has for as long as Sean has known him – is that not some proof of insanity? What about completely abandoning the job he’d let cost him his marriage? Sean has a childhood’s worth of memories full of the awful things that their father did to Aaron. Could that not speak to a level of detachment and complete shutdown that Jessica and Sean encountered on a near daily basis? With the right lawyer, some luck on who the judge is, that’s a case they could win. 

Jessica huffs, “he is insane.” As painful as the urge to call a lawyer is, Jessica can’t get rid of this nagging feeling hammering in her chest. She too can think of plenty of good testaments to the complete level of detachment that Aaron shows. Things she could phrase just the right way to completely abandon Aaron’s behavior from reason. But louder than those memories are the dark ones. The three of them laying in Haley’s bed, her asleep between them, when Aaron admitted into the darkness that would be easier for all of them if he were just dead. Haley’s parents wouldn’t be mad at her. Jessica wouldn’t fight with them. Sean would have a happy home to grow up in, one without a trouble-making older brother. The logic that bled into his tone was so sound-proof, his certainty so unswayable, that it shocked Jessica. To hear him so certain of something that made her fucking heart ache to just have to imagine. 

And there was depression. She’d pretend to tell herself that it was new but it wasn’t. Seattle had been the longest-bought he’d ever had. The two years that they lived there were full of Haley’s hushed frets over the phone. Called Jessica every day with new proof of how far he’d slipped. All he did was work. It made him great at his job, if not a little temperamental. He could be too bold, too dangerous, and with no real voice in his head to call him back from it. No fear of repercussions. And then he came home and slept. Didn’t move, barely eating. Haley was making every excuse to slip into his showers, any way to be present with him in fear of what would happen if he strayed out of her sight. 

While Jessica’s heart aches with the urge to keep Aaron as close to her as possible, her head is becoming more and more certain that this is his decision to make. It’s making her frantic, putting her on edge. But she got five years out of him. For five years she did what she thought would make him happy. Sean has filled his life with the company. Animals that Aaron braves winter storms to take care of. He has patterns, rhythms, and a life full of love. And he’s miserable. 

How much longer is it supposed to take? How much longer until the few years he has left aren’t worth a small final bit of happiness? And what if it’s not happiness he gets to, just slightly less miserableness? 

And what if it never comes? They’re past “mid-life”, the climax of Aaron’s life has occurred and he’s dragging through the resolution, bringing his story to a close. This surgery does no more than guarantee a few more years, Aaron won’t live into his seventies or likely see the real effects of sixty. And his so story will be a short tragedy. Shakespearian, really. Hamlet was driven to madness by the loss of his father and Macbeth, at the loss of his lady, gained the blinding grief capable of driving him to attack Macduff. Aaron has lived at least three-fourths of his life, seventy-five percent, and realized how bad the story is. He’s lived through tragedies and had some really great highs but he’s not playing odds. He’s familiar with the game and knows the pattern, enough to predict what comes next. 

Sean rattles off about a lawyer that cleared him of “a totally bogus charge” that Sean was “completely innocent! I don’t even do coke, man”. This lawyer got him off “super easy” both times Aaron hired the guy but struggles to recall the last time he talked to the guy. “I can’t remember, had the guy twice. I was like, ugh, nineteen the second time”. 

Jessica doesn’t comment but she does glance at him. He did coke in college. It’d been during the time of their first adult Christmas failure. All four of them packed into Haley and Aaron’s tiny apartment picking at the over-cooked turkey, it was the night before Christmas Eve. While they’d all earned the courage to hype up how well their party would go but as they sat surrounded by the proof of their failings, the conversation shifted to the goodies waiting for them in their mother’s kitchens. Aaron went out to get ice cream, already certain he’d be on the receiving end of Haley’s wrath over her burnt pie despite his helpfulness. And also to sneak a cigarette. The whole affair was stressing him out and no matter how many times he quit, their convenience was too easy. It took Sean five minutes to follow his brother out, looking for the same relief and realized, to his horror, that Aaron had grabbed Sean’s coat and not his own. 

He was, ultimately, too late. Aaron had already stuck his hands down in the pockets in search of a lighter and found Sean’s stash. He was furious, naturally. If Aaron wanted to do it, that was different. Sean was a kid. Sean thought this image of Aaron looked too much like their father. The smell of the alcohol on his breath and the lit cigarette pinched between his fingers as he swore, seething that Sean couldn’t even drink yet. What business did he have in drugs at an age that the law stated was too immature for alcohol? 

On the walk, Aaron had cooled off enough to apologize. He’d remembered then the way cigarettes carry on clothes, that Haley would smell it on him, and be even more furious. If he could cool himself off he could get the guilt that yelling at Sean had caused off his chest, save them both the ear-full and maybe save Christmas. Well, what was left to salvage? But not without first lecturing Sean on smoking, most of the same words Haley had shouted to him every time he picks the habit back up. 

She found out anyway. She wasn’t stupid but she sat on it and then had too much wine and decided to bait him. Aaron crumbled after twenty minutes of her asking him to get her one. He realized his mistake the second he got up but thought maybe he was off the hook when she lit it with no more than a tight frown. 

He got it later. She waited until Sean and Jessica left the next morning, making sweet promises for New Year’s Eve. 

He hasn’t smoked since. 

Aaron sleeps the entire car ride home from the hospital. They’d started in the local one and transferred him the second he was stable enough to the city hospital. A rocky, terrifying fifty-minute drive. The drive back home is thick with half-spoken tensions. Sean has his seat back too far for Aaron to comfortably fit behind him, so he’s turned in his chair to stretch his legs out behind Jessica’s seat. His head is on the window, spared the car’s tremors by the pillow the nurse sent him off with. 

Sean knows it’s a mistake the moment he considers it but he thinks this means getting Aaron inside will be easy. 

Sometimes he wishes he could kick himself. 

His back is still displeased by Sean “Hulk”ing out in the backyard. Panicked brain and a body thrumming with adrenaline had him lifting Aaron up off the ground without much consideration for the repercussions. But he offers to carry Aaron in. A piggyback ride is what he offers because that’s the most dignified way he can imagine getting Aaron in. He’s shot down quickly, a stifling icy glare that spoke clearly for what Aaron thought of the offer. 

Sean slid in beside his brother, shifting under the stiff discomfort of Aaron’s tense muscles. 

“N–Not the couch.”

Sean is doing far more than his share of the walking. Aaron makes it into the house, just barely. There are a combined six stairs between the porch and the step up through the door. The first two Aaron took in stride and every single one following that with agonized gasping and straining to keep his legs from buckling out from underneath him. 

“I’m not sure you’re going anywhere else,” Sean winces, caving anyway to where Aaron’s pulling him. 

But they make it up the stairs. Aaron’s true grit and determination pushing on past his body and through Sean’s disbelief. 

And then he sleeps. 

Daisy is released from Sean’s bedroom. Jessica had come in the house first, using the advantage of Daisy’s predictable excitement against her to convince her to follow Jessica into the closest room. But Daisy’s disinterested in Jessica the moment she hears Aaron. His voice is gravelly, words lost quickly to the deep tone of his voice from this great distance but Daisy hears him, and then she’s restless, whining at the door as patiently as she can for Jessica to let her out. 

She’s surprisingly gently considering her size. She hops up onto the end of Aaron’s bed, stopping for a moment to turn and inspect his hospital socks. Sniffing curiously up his leg until his blankets end her exploration. She snorts a pleasing sound and wiggles up to lay beside Aaron. She nudges his head with her own, licking at his cheek until he breaks, facing cracking into a smile and his hand sneaking out from under the covers to pet her. 

Jessica stays in the doorway, watching a stolen moment.

What comes next?

She will come home from the hospital. Daisy will be waiting. Sean will disappear – old Sean would show in a few days, calling from jail, but new Sean always finds his way home in the back of his friend’s pick-ups before dawn. Sean will return. She’ll distract herself with his hangover. 

The world around them will keep going. 

No matter what comes next, time will pass. Presses forward and no matter how hard you drag your heels, it will bring you with it. 

Jessica presses her heels in as Aaron’s alarm clock mocks her from his nightstand. 

______________

Daisy lazily doses against his legs. She’d had her breakfast kibble, the final scraps of oatmeal from Aaron’s bowl, and half of an apple. A good, lazy morning. Sean had come out onto the porch early, a cup of coffee in his hands,  as he made his way out to check to see how the night had treated their friends. Grey was waiting patiently at the barn doors. He refuses to stay in the shed with the other goats overnight and prefers instead to roam freely along the farm. It’s a miracle the coyotes haven’t gotten him. 

Aaron chuckled and Daisy looked up in alarm when Sean starts screaming, “you son of a bitch! Goddman you Grey!” 

He kicked Sean into a trough, his coffee and clothes lost to the dirty water. 

Sean’s inside when the black SUV starts rolling up the driveway. It’s a good mile out but Aaron knows exactly what it is. 

He assumes worse than reality. He knew the bureau would give him a year, let him settle into solitude without disturbance, but the day would come. The bureau will call, roll their fancy SUV up into the yard, and remind him of the oath he took. He’s seen things and knows things that nothing but the experience can teach and he is their most vital source of experience. A resource they can not turn away, loose into the world. It will sound like a request but it is not. 

They’re a contrasting image. Hotch with a rifle aimed at their heads and the grey pitbull standing at his feet. Furious displeasure versus a big smile and a wagging tail. After a long moment, he lowers the gun. Grunts and the dog takes that as her release and runs up to the car. 

Derek got out of the car first, nudging his sunglasses from the bridge of his nose with his finger so he can look at Hotch. It’s Garcia and Reid that make him lower the gun. Hotch hasn’t seen Derek in years, it makes his chest start to cramp up. Pain mixed with fear, the sudden overwhelming ability to remember that day. Nothing but betrayal, sharp and stinging. He thinks they’ve sent Derek to do the retrieving, sent him to bring Hotch back, and he knows Derek was probably felt unforgivingly betrayed by Hotch’s final orders and method of leave but… Hotch thought they’d understand. After everything that happened, to him and to them, that no one could understand what he did better than them. And to see Derek, it was heartbreaking.

But then Garcia peaks around the car, smiling brightly and chirping a very bright and happy, “sir!” As if she can’t see the gun at all, just beyond excited that he’s actually standing right in front of her. Daisy goes to Garic first, and greets her first with a happy little dance around her feet. Too eager to even stand still as she snakes happily between Derek’s feet, sticks her head between Derek’s knees, and then pushes through to Reid. 

“Daisy.” 

She’s the biggest pitbull Garcia’s ever seen, with a big head and broad shoulders. All big and floppy as she tears back off for Hotch’s side. Stops right at his feet, staring up at him with her tongue hanging out. “Worst guard dog ever,” he grumbles, reaching down and scratching behind her ears. “Go inside.” She barks and runs around his legs but comes back to sit on Hotch’s toes. “Go,” he commands again, pointing up to the house. She doesn’t move. He groans, not unaccustomed to her not listening. “I’m coming,” he promises, pointing her up towards the door. “Go inside.” This time she takes off, big hard strides towards the stairs. She’s heavy and climbs the stairs with great thuds. She paws at the screen door and squeezes her head in first, and sits down right in front of the door. And watches them. 

“Daisy?” Derek asks as he comes up to the fence. He pushes his glasses up from his face and smirks. 

Hotch is still standing with his shotgun tipped back on his shoulder, his lips do not move from their tight frown as he responds unenthused. “She came with the name.” 

Penelope sees her in and comes up to the fence, a bright, uncontrollable smile on her face. “Sir!” she whispers, finally close enough to get a look at him. He’s like another person standing before her. It’s him, she knows it, but he doesn’t even sound like himself. “You look like a real farmer!”

He just stares at her, unwavering – no blinking, just that tight frown. 

It’s a little disheartening, Penelope isn’t exactly sure how to get past the intense agitation so clearly written across Hotch’s face. Lots of people don’t like Penelope, she’s too much and she knows that. And that’s okay because all the right people love her, and as Derek would say, they must be a lame crowd to not recognize such a great person. But one person who has not loved Penelope is Hotch. Even at her most insane, he’s always met her with a tired sigh and a kind word. He’s practical and all things unfun but he encouraged her to be herself at this job and has never once allowed her to be reprimanded for her attire not being “professional”. So to see him like this… 

“I’ve really missed you, sir.” 

Hotch nods but looks away. 

The sudden sound of talking had drawn Sean from the kitchen, away from his snack in a panic. Aaron can be rather… unpleasant to visitors. He’s intense and it’s just better any lost travelers or nosy neighbors that make it up their driveway be intercepted before Aaron gets to them. 

But he’s already too late. Sean runs out to the porch, all nervous as he rushes down the steps. “Hey,” Sean greets nervously. His eyes flick to Aaron, shocked more and more as he processes all of what is in front of him. “What’s up, man!” He goes to Derek first, hugging his old friend, but pulling away quickly. His attention can’t be pulled from the shotgun in Aaron’s hands. “What the hell is that?” He knows where it came from. They purchased it years ago when they got the farm. Something to keep nosey foxes and coyotes out of the farm. “Jesus,” Sean reaches down and pulls it from Hotch’s hands. “What were you going to do with this?” Sean asks, entirely thrown by Aaron’s behavior. “I’m sorry,” he apologizes, to the others. “He’s not usually this bad.” He shakes his head once more at Aaron, completely annoyed and shocked by the situation. “Well, he is but–” Sean waves it off, “doesn’t matter. Come inside. Get out of the heat.”

Sean shoots Aaron another dirty look of disbelief as he shakes his head and shows Derek, Penelope, and Spencer inside. 

“Sit, sit,” Sean motions them all to the kitchen table. “Water? Lunch? You guys hungry?” He’s shot down immediately but Spencer looks a little displeased by the offer for a snack disappearing. 

Hotch takes a seat at the table out of necessity rather than a desire to be seated so close to the others. All the adrenaline his body had worked up is leaving him quickly – his vision spotty and his heart thumping erratically in his chest. It’s a distinct feeling. It beats hard but only occasionally, every few beats just harder than the rest. Aaron focuses on breathing while Sean hosts, getting water going despite the unanimous decline. His face feels hot, his hands trembling. 

Daisy returns to Aaron, sitting at his legs and watching him as he tries to ride through the wave. She rests her head on his knee, solid against him. 

“This is impressive,” Derek doesn’t sit but makes his way around to the windows, trying to catch even glimpses of the property. “How many acres?”

“I think about twenty acres.” Sean doesn’t really know but Derek makes an impressed face and nods. Is twenty acres a lot? Is that something to be impressed about? How much is an acre? He has more questions but none that will be answered. If he remembers later, he’ll google it. 

“It must be peaceful out here,” Penelope says. She leans, trying to put herself in Aaron’s line of sight. He’s staring at the chair across from him, allowing Daisy’s cold nose on his hand to keep him present. He doesn’t hear the question being directed at him but Penelope speaks again and this time he sees her. “Do you have any more pets?”

Aaron grunts, and gives her a nod. 

“Oh!” she smiles, “what’re their names, where are they?”

Aaron shrugs, “they’re barn cats, probably in the barn.”

Sean scoffs and rolls his eyes. Penelope looks up at him and he can’t stand the look of horror on her face. Not when the truth is better than Aaron’s lie. “He calls them barn cats but those kittens haven’t slept in that barn since the night he found them out there.” Sean shakes his head, “ ‘less you count catnaps in the hay.” 

Penelope nods, touching her chest with sincere relief. “What are their names? I want to see them.”

Sean smirks, “well, Aaron did name them, so they’ve got weird names but the solid grey one is One and the one with the spot is Two.” 

Derek chuckles. 

“Wherever Two is, One will be. They prefer the living room, slipping in the windows.” Penelope gets up immediately, pointing towards the door, and Sean nods. “Two won’t let you pick her up, I doubt, but One will.” That’s all she needs to hear. 

“One and Two, huh?” Derek shakes his head. “Good thing Daisy came with a name then.” She looks up at Derek when he says her name, gives him a little wiggle of excitement at being mentioned before she whines, and returns her head to Aaron’s lap. 

Sean nods, she’d probably be named Dog otherwise. 

“Is that a goat?” Spencer hadn’t said much. He wishes Penelope hadn’t gotten up so quickly. He would have liked to come but by the time she was standing his anxiety had decided his following would be too delayed and therefore embarrassing. Which left him. He was now sitting the closest to Hotch. It was fine before, he’d simply sat down beside Penelope but now it was just weird. Sean and Derek talking and him and Hotch just… But then he’d focused his attention on the outside. 

Sean looks over and sighs, “that fucking goat.” He walks over to the screen door and smacks it, trying to startle Grey off the porch. He’s afraid to go outside, and prefers to keep the screen door between him and gods most foul creation. “It’s Grey,” he grumbles and he hears Aaron sigh. “He’s the meanest son of bitch on this farm. Not a goat at all. He’s just a dick.” He accents his last sentence with a blow to the screen door. Grey gets the message and kicks the door back. Hitting it with a solid thunk that shakes the thin door hard. It makes Sean startle and he takes a step back before jerking his body at Grey. “Fuck off!” Sean shouts and Grey jumps down. 

Hotch’s voice comes softly, for Derek and Spencer’s ears only. “He kicked Sean into the watering trough this morning.” There’s a light humorous edge to his voice that Spencer hasn’t heard in so long. He knows it. He’s heard it a thousand times before but for fives years he’s been deprived of that tone. Hotch was his friend, one of few. He understood Spencer better than Spencer sometimes. Hotch had filled in as best he could for Gideon and Spencer appreciated the man’s every strange attempt to bond. Even his discipline. He’d missed having Hotch to talk to, to share inside jokes about. To look to when no one else understands him. 

It was like Hotch had died. 

He was here and then he wasn’t.

Derek laughs at Hotch’s comment but Spencer can’t trust himself to say a thing, to do anything. 

“How are office things?” Sean asks, returning to the sink now that Grey has made his way into the yard to disturb the peace of the other goats. He leans his hips back against the sink and crosses his arms. 

Derek shrugs indifferently, “you know, same old, same old.” He’s not sure how to talk about the BAU. To tell the truth, it would feel like manipulation. Hotch has a life out here. Semi-decent from the looks of it. To sit here and describe the ways that they mourn his loss and the disconnection they feel with each other is cruel. It’s not fair. But also  it’s brought them closer. It’s allowed them to bond more and trust more. But he’s also not sure how to talk about that either. If it would still be true if the thought left his mind and came into being, would words be able to clarify what it was he’s thinking in his head. 

“I’m doing a lecture at a university on Narcissistic Personality Disorder.” The words just burst out of Spencer’s mouth. They leave his mouth as quickly as they come to his mind, a thought that completely skips the step of being judged. It makes Spencer stutter, realizing suddenly that while his comment made complete sense in his head, out loud it lacks necessary context. But he’s not sure how to give it context. “...because we had that disagreement about–”

“I remember,” Hotch says softly, nodding. “The definition of a classic narcissist.” He can’t really remember that conversation itself, the word narcissist brings him to a different memory. Blood sliding down Spencer’s face as the gun fired with the barrel aimed at his head. Tobias Hankel’s voice, choose one. Hotch swallows thickly, “how is that?”

Spencer shrugs, he smiles a little, shyly. “The director said my conjectural approach–”

“He’s fantastic,” Derek says over him. Shaking his head, “he just uses words like conjectural and no one understands him.” Spencer is good. He really is but the problem is that numerous Ph.Ds has taught him words that most of the population doesn’t know. They do not exist within the confines of the regular social lexicon. Derek and Hotch both know what conjectural means, it’s within their knowledge. They studied law. It comes up. Not everyone in Spencer’s lectures have a degree in law. Aware now of the problem, Spencer is trying a little harder to be more aware of the words that he uses. The problem had to be broken down, Derek had to sit and explain that the director wasn’t complimenting Spencer’s vocabulary, he was making a critic. That Spencer was confusing the hell out of his class. 

 “I just don’t understand where I’m losing them…” Spencer mumbles, shaking his head. 

Derek chuckles, shaking his head sympathetically. “How are things here?” 

Sean had grown distracted. Stupidly sentimental. He was looking at the empty farm. There are things frozen throughout the field. Aaron uses a rusted-up truck to reach the far end and it’s right where he left it, paused in turn. That’s it. How long would it have sat there if–

“Sean!”

“Huh?” Sean turns around, “what? Sorry…”

Derek chuckles and Sean tries a smile, it shakes but Derek doesn’t notice. “What’s been going on? Got a whole farm, man, can’t be quiet around here.” 

Sean just stares. His lips get harder and harder to hold firmly in a smile. A moment too long passes before Sean blinks, and he stiffly moves his jaw – as if he’s just become aware of its slacked hang and learning the movement of shutting it again as it closes. He swallows and then his eyes move, away from Derek and away to the floor, his head following their glide. “The oth-other day,” his voice cracks, too soft at the beginning until he clears his throat. Until he pulls his eyes back up from the floor. “We– He–” 

Sean had felt every ounce of pain, grief, and terror that has happened over the last two days. It wasn’t suppressed, that means contained, reserved, pressed. Nothing about those feelings, nothing about how he has felt has been contained, reserved, pressed. But it all seems to come bursting out, a bottle of soda knocked around the fridge a little too unforgivingly. Sean starts to cry. As his body strains against his will, filling his eyes with tears, and forcing his mouth down into a frown, he feels nothing but embarrassment and the flush of the force of his crying. 

“I’m sorry,” Sean manages, handing over his mouth as he sucks in a shuddering breath. “I’m so sorry. I don’t know– Shit!” 

Daisy follows Sean, they watch her trot slowly after him. She’s not fast enough to make it to his room before Sean slams the door but she sits outside the door anyway. It doesn’t take her long to give up her post. 

The kitchen is silent. The whole house was just silent. 

“What was that about?” 

Aaron shrugs, pulling his lips tight to hide the grimace of pain as the movement pulls on the aching muscles in his chest. “Hard to tell.” 

#criminal minds #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #spencer reid #penelope garcia #Jessica brooks #sean hotchner

[toxicyurituesday]

talk about ur ocs, now. this is a threat

Hi Anon bot I’m gonna assume is one of my mutuals onsite or offsite do you even know what you’re asking me to do

Adding cws as I go, someone tell me if I missed something

A lot of this is word vomit

Spoilers for my fangan except idrc because I’m never doing anything with it

Fallen Cards [ Danganronpa ] 3/16

CWs: Murder, strong language, child abuse, alcohol, abandonment, hospital, death

Suki Hikosaburo

Okay so I think I use she/her/clove/clover for this bitch maybe idk.

Clove’s the protagonist of Falling Cards‼️ Yunno despite me not using her like ever because honestly I don’t find her that interesting to roleplay with

Anyways clove originally started off as just Kiyo’s love interest who didn’t go to Hope’s Peak but somehow ended up in the killing game bc she’s special

Now she’s the Ultimate Private Investigator 👌 She gathers information for her brother Chinen to use in court cases

She’s really desensitized to murder and comes off as really insensitive during the investigations

Suki is very headstrong, it’s her way or the high way

^ That actually ends up nearly killing Hoshi ( and indirectly kills glooms if she fucks up during Chapter 4 )

Backstory stuff timeeee

Clove grew up in an upper class household

Has the whole picture perfect family ( 1 mom, 1 dad, 1 brother, and her ) going on here

Anyways her mom runs a private investigation firm

Suki went to a private school

During her second year one of the teachers was murdered

This bitch stuck clover nose where it shouldn’t and ended up getting 2 students and another teacher arrested

Homegirl is fucking ecstatic that she got it right and somehow convinces her mom to let her intern at the private investigation firm when she’s 14

Good job ig 😥

Just realized Maru might be reading this hi Maru don’t tell anybody in the Discord about the Hoshi stuff please and thank you

Anyways

She’s 16

Originally I was gonna put clover in a poly relationship w/ Kiyo and Sonoda but that’s on that backseat burner rn cause fuck love more murder

Friends with: Chinen, Kiyo, Sonoda, Umeko, Umeda, and Aoki

Chinen Hikosaburo

Ooooh we do not talk about why he was created in the first place

Anyways he’s straight now bc of that

The only cishet guy ever

He has the fattest crush on Kiyo ( who acts like they don’t know because they’re not willing to lose a friend and does not at all like him in that way )

Honestly the only reason I ship SuKiyo nowadays is so that I can say Chinen got cucked by his sister lmao

Hi Maru if you’re reading this SatoKiyo4lifers

He has so many friends what

Ladies’ man ( apologetic )

He’s persuasive! And kinda manipulative but we don’t talk about that

Is it weird to call your own oc hot cause if not 😁

I’m kidding he’s just well dressed

I have a twisted view on what frat boys act like and that is exactly what Chinen is

Anyways he’s Suki’s twin‼️

He’s the Ultimate Lawyer

Guy won a shit ton of debates AND got something in his town’s law changed

He says he’s hot shit and he means it

Friends with: Suki, Kiyo, Sonoda, Mizuki, Takeshi, and Aster

Kiyo Watanabe/Brooke Allen

“Koro do you ever shut up about them” Of course I do how do you think I catch my breath? Through my nose? Anyways

Kisses them on the cheek then throws the box I put them in into the ocean ( affectionate )

The only reason they’re the Ultimate Florist is bc at the time I was obsessed over Flowershop AUs

It ended up working out really well so

Their hair is dyed brown, natural hair color is black

They’re nearsighted and cannot see out of one eye completely

Anyways I wanna talk about their backstory

Their actual name is Brooke Allen ( they never had it legally changed to Kiyo Watanabe for some reason??? They’re fine with being called Brooke btw, they actually kinda like it better than Kiyo [ bonus points for Brookie /j don’t call em that ] )

So anyways they’re white British and lived in England for the first 12 years of their life

Their dad was named Remington [ Remi for short ] and he ran a somewhat popular business

Their mom’s named Heather and she had no job

Remington was uh,,,,an alcoholic

Honestly he never did anything to Brooke when drunk cause he always passed out, but it was annoying for her to have to drag him from the couch and to his bed

It was when he was sober

He wanted Brooke to take over the business when he retired so he pushed their education to the extreme

Whenever they got a question wrong, he would drag a needle across their skin just enough to draw blood

They have a lot of fading scars bc of this, and are very ashamed of them

One day he kinda punched Brooke in the eye while they had their glasses on

And ended up breaking the glass and completely scarring their left eye, hence why they can’t see through it present day

He actually hugged Brooke after that but that’s like the only “”””affection”””””” he showed them ever

Heather doesn’t do jack shit because she’s normalized this behavior

Fast forward to when they’re like 13

The family is in Japan for a year bc Remi got a contract

During this time Brooke meets an old man named Akira who runs a flower shop

Neither Remington nor Heather really cared about where Brooke went as long as they weren’t dead

So Brooke went over to this flower shop every day

Sometimes Akira would give them candy for helping move pots around for him

Most of the time they would just hang around his kitten Ultra Gurl Strawberry ( or Ugs for short )

Or some of the regulars ( specifically Alicia, Daku, and Chinen )

At the end of the year Akira closed his shop down for the day and took Brooke out for ice cream and they said their goodbyes :)

Yunno until Heather collared them to a bike pole in some fit of desperation to keep them in Japan bc she’s seen how much happier they were

Brooke was stuck in the rain until the next day

Alicia, her boyfriend Daku, and some friends are in the area and find this drenched 14 year old passed out on the floor and chained to a bike pole

They can’t break the chains and none of them have charged phones so they pound on the flower shop’s door because it’s like the closest shop

Akira drives to his shop to get ready for the day and sees this group of teenagers panicking

Brooke’s still asleep/passed out despite all the racket

Akira ends up breaking the chains off with a plier ( wasn’t able to break off all the chains w/o hurting Brooke )

Brooke ended up in the hospital and didn’t wake up until the next day

A bunch of this is emotional stuff and I cannot put that into words so we’re skipping to the adoption 👌

Daku’s moms ( Akira [ a different Akira ] and Amai ] adopt Brooke

Remington is paid off to fuck off

Alicia is still Brooke’s best friend

Also while Brooke is helping old man Akira run his flower shop, Chinen offers to find a new name for them

Brooke is reluctant but decides to forget their past entirely

They’re Kiyo now

Old man Akira dies btw

Kiyo is devastated

He ended up passing his flower shop onto Kiyo

Anyways Kiyo dresses goth because Amai and Daku do it

I’m gonna come back to this w/ more characters because this alone took me a shit ton of time to write and my phone’s at 10 percent

#dr:fc

[tasteforrot]

Everything Is Dumb Now

everything seems dumb now

or the problems before tuesday

or my problems before tuesday

or the problems i focused on before tuesday

idk if theyre really dumb

but probably

does he like me will it work

venus in pisces taurus sun with a cancer ascendent

moon in leo

idk why liking someone is so terrifying to me

my shrink asked me why having basic needs met seems so impossible

or.

idk

the moon was in aquarius on tuesday i think

or i remember reading “let us hope this is a good omen”

(probably chani nicholas)

for two months i refreshed nine horoscope sites daily asking the internet

what would happen

i saw something this week

about the election coverage was too… like

focusing more on what will happen in november

not what was happening at the time

what will happen vs what is happening

what do we know

idk

this past month i began calling more feelings “pain”

laying in bed thinking “i’m in so much pain lol”

um

have you ever read the attachment theory wikipedia?

i’m sure there are better sources but the wikipedia is really convenient

there are four styles.

and this one style, “disorganized” is like

something like:

the way you’re greeted when you enter a room

and the way you’re treated

was never constant so u never like,

never know when the other shoe will drop

who will abandon when

or u’ll wild out bc like, idk.

the others are what they sound like

secure attachment style is what it sounds like

ppl with disorganized attachment ruin things, sabotage things

bc what’s the point if it’s already. idk

wednesday morning

when i told my therapist i watched someone die, she said

“oh, fuck talking about the election”

but like nah

we talked about the election

and the two guys i saw wearing those red hats

the first time ive seen them irl

first thing in the morning

on my walk up tenth avenue

i almost threw up

and threw myself on them but didnt

but i did also tell her i didn’t feel anything watching him die,

or i didn’t know what i felt or if i was feeling.

i watched him become president from my bed

scared of feeling anything except the most reality as possible

a few hours before,

i watched him make a noise and then he stopped breathing

and then a nurse hit his chest and said, “he’s just sleeping”

(he wasn’t)

she said he had a pulse, he’s fine

(he wasn’t)

it took the supervisor twenty-five minutes to show up

hospice care in a nursing home isn’t a hospital

the way she said it’s about making him comfortable

the way:

there are things that are supposed to happen

people asked if i was ok

my boss hugged me

idk if it was the death or the election

or what i’ve been saying online that has ppl msging me lately

telling me they hope im ok soon

waking up is harder now

it never really was before

i learned to like mornings in college

they felt more hopeful

opportunity, routine, etc

my shrink also told me to read online

specifically disorganized attachment

but that for some reason

and who knows

it’s not all I have. that i can do and do make secure bonds

there’s some secure attachment

something like hope?

idk

she said: attachments just are

you can’t force them

an attachment is

when i told my shrink about his last breath she said something like:

isn’t that all we have, a breath

and then we take another

and keep going

that’s the only difference

other times i’ve watched people die

(and never the act)

there was the clear moment between when they were gone

(when they started taking pain meds)

not their body but themselves

“the priority is comfort”

i only realized today that i don’t know whether or not he was in pain

just that when i got to his room, alone

i’ve never seen anyone like that

i thought he was going to die right then

with me alone

so i grabbed his hand, which was blue

and trying to take off his oxygen mask

i’ve been hearing the term “oxygen mask” a lot more

put on your oxygen mask before you help others

everyone says get out of ur internet bubble

lol

i mean, i agree

i guess

but i live alone

work online

my family is three white men

(it used to be more)

who asked me why i didn’t tell them about my sexual assaults sooner

(i had)

but i guess they forgot

or it doesnt matter? idk

i dont want to have to see them today

or tomorrow

but their dad only dies once

only died once

idk

before tuesday i’d get drunk

get stoned

wake up

apologize

idk

ever since tuesday the idea of feeling anything the most amount of

pain feels wrong

not pain for pain’s sake

but anesthetizing any of the reality

of what is and is about to happen

idk

isn’t there something about how pain is a great motivator

or isnt there that susan sontag thing about not believing someone else is in

pain?

is that the thing

or how people with that disease that makes them not feel pain are fucked

i can’t believe the pain i cause by trying to avoid pain

(myself + others)

getting out of bed isn’t a problem

or wasn’t before tuesday

(now it is)

i’m right by a window and it’s cold

and i just remember it’s real

and i’m where i was where i watched him become president

but

i like routine and waking up and drinking coffee

more so i feel it around 3pm or 5pm or 8pm or 11pm

what’s the fucking point

i don’t feel that way anymore

my anxiety’s been down since all my worst fears came true

i’m not as worried for now as i am a year from now

a year and three months

momentum, etc

it’s been clearer who’s trying to lessen suffering and who’s trying to clear

their name

i’ve been trying to take up less space

or occupy space in a different way

or, idk.

it’s easier to tell ppl i love them

u dont need a reason anymore

or maybe the reason is just more obvious

it’s too much noise n it’s not enough

im getting msgs from ppl telling me to stockpile birth control

but my body rejects most types of birth control

and i haven’t found one that works yet

so like

idk

hasnt loving and fucking always been terrifying

#Darcie Wilder #Through Clenched Teeth

[a-tale-of-legends]

One thing that I need to clear up for myself is how N progress through time. Like what does he do between bw to swsh/TBWS.

I know that unlike canon, he doesn't do his farewell speech, as he just witness his friend get attacked by Ghetsis' Hydreigon, literally bleeding out. I think due to that and just the entire shock and panic of the situation he just fled. Not out of malice! He was scared for Alexis and Elliot ( whom he didn't know where she was or if she was hurt but the fear was still there), but he just couldn't be there at the moment. He just couldn't. So he left. ( Heh, N and Alexis parallel there).

He constantly bash himself for leaving without knowing if his friends are okay, so throughout his 2 year journey, he didn't know if they were alive or not. Though, on the bright side, the 2 years away from Unova did help him reflect and recognize what he wants. Good new there!

In B2W2, he runs into Elliot and after some friction ( mostly from Elliot) he ends up getting adopted by the Jones. ....okay, no, that's not what happens, but they do let him stay in their house when he needs to sleep so he doesn't sleep in the wild...or on the streets. Elliot and N also team up, as Team Plasma is back and Elliot wants to kick their ass. N is....less than thrilled, but senses something in pain via Reshiram. So yeah he's gonna help. I like to believe that N has a bad habit of just going off on his own, causing Elliot to chase after him a lot ( grown ass man can't stay still for a second, Arceus-).

Now for some introspective, N is overjoyed that Elliot is alive and well, but is so heartbroken when he sees her left leg. Like, he can't help but feel like he was the one that caused all of this pain ( to which, in a sense, he kinda did, but it's also not his fault, you know?). He actually asks about Alexis, since he doesn't seem him anywhere, and Elliot hasn't mentioned him. So, good news, he lived the Hydreigon attack! Bad news, he ran away from the hospital and left Unova and no one knows where he is, so there's a 50/50 chance he could be dead. Fuck. It's even weirder with that he can't really sense Zekrom through Reshiram, so this just sends N into an internal panic and blaming of himself.

The rest plays out as B2W2 until Alexis comes to help and that just brings more emotions. I think N was never the one to initiate a hug until that moment. The joy and relief that his friend his alive ( maybe not okay, but still alive). He was legit gonna go for a hug until Elliot beat him and punched Alexis in the face. Then Cheren and Bianca came into the scene and just the look on Alexis' face kinda just....deterred him from doing anything else. Oh. And he gave Reshiram to Elliot, but that's for later.

Now, a little side tangent, I remember seeing headcanons that N eventually runs a daycare or becomes a daycare worker OR helps rescue abandoned and abused pokemon and I just love that I have those roles to everyone else except him lol. This poor man gets nothing.

Anyway, from B2W2 to SwSh/TBWS, it's a bit iffy. I'm not sure if N leaves Unova again in fear of making things worse ( completely misguided and anxiety filled assumption), and feels like he has so much to make up for all the wrongs he did. I think he travels Unova again, this time without the threat of Team Plasma revising. Though, and I just realize this, the man would probably be interrogated by the police? Cause he's connected to a terroist group? So, uh, that probably happens. Not a good time. But I think he's able to go free ( maybe house arrest for a bit? Idk. Ideas help), and THEN he travels Unova again. He gets to see all of his friends again :)

Outside of traveling, it's hard to tell what he does in terms of his relationship with the other characters. Cause the whole ordeal is a mess. No one is communicating and those that do communicate end up doing it wrong. He can speak to Cheren just fine, if not a bit akward, but he kinda has to dance around the fact that he wants to be friends with Alexis again cause from what Cheren's pokemon told him, things are tense. Elliot is easier ( she rants to him if she needs it) but it just hurts to see the twins be so distant. Their bond is what made N admire them after all. Finally Bianca, who is arguably the only one who knows her shit and acts by it. She already talked to Alexis about what happened, and while she's not going to try and force people to talk ( she believes that it's up to the people themselves to fix things, not an outside force), she's still kind and understanding to all sides. Bascically, she and N become bff's. They're both nerds and she's really pleasant to talk too :)

N thinks that Alexis doesn't even want to talk to him, let alone look at him. Which hurts, but he understands. It wasn't until Elliot once again forced N to sleep over at the Jones house was when the two talked. Not about literally everything that happened, but just. Talked. It was small, awkward ( Alexis still looked terrible), but it was a start. Soon it became apparent that the three were bascically siblings ( N loves affectionately bullying Elliot and Alexis. Mainly with his height. Especially with his height), and their relationship was getting better. It was no surprise that N eventually started to visit the daycare on route 3, when Alexis started working. He loves playing with the baby pokemon.

There's a lot more that could be said here ( like N's relationships with Eva and Wayne) but this is already so long. I just wanted to talk about Legendverse! N.

#r rambles #oc: alexis jones #oc: elliot jones #legendverse #legendverse! n

[phenomenalmillz]

I can’t deny the fact that everything in my life that’s fucked up that a part of it it’s my fault I gotta admit that but damn I never meant bad towards no one in my life I never asked nor deserved to be traumatized the way I was in my life wtf and now i feel so lost feels like god abandoned me I’ve made so many stupid decisions listening to others cause I’ve felt so paranoid all my life making wrong choices that led my family to where they are now not knowing that’s how they ended up in the same situation now here I am broken in so many different ways it hurts so bad to want someone you know you once had and can’t believe I let my trauma make decisions that cause her to distance herself from me and I miss the connection we have and if I would of just focused on getting more situated in my life & never let other people opinions comments and thought get a reaction and work on to stop giving everyone I come across a back and fourth energy I wouldn’t be in these situations today it hurts that I gotta love her from a distance and that things could never go back to the way they was because her family would be concerned for her safety and by all means have every right after I fucked up choking her cause I couldn’t handle her walking out the door on me because i didn’t want her to leave me when I should of been a man and stood by decision and just let her eventually we would have work things out but I let myself get out of control just to I could have control but all I got was someone who loved me dearly and forgave after I said I wouldn’t do it again and did unthinkable again and broke her trust more than just going to go try to talk to a random hook I broke her trust to make her feel that the man she lays down with would never be the same person to lay a hand after her after all her past trauma I broke that promise and even tho we got on good term after the damage at that point would cause her to run from me little by little and i didn’t want her to hate me so i broke up with her because i didn’t want to be her trauma I wanted to be her love but i got traumas that hasn’t been resolved and it’s because I haven’t done what i needed to do for myself spending my things on money on things i already have enough of honestly can’t even vent without someone trying to tell me something about myself that’s why I keep my thoughts and feelings so isolated but look where that’s got me here venting among myself because I can’t handle in internal pain cause by everything that’s happen in the past and right now & scared that if anyone saw me like this I’ll just be judge sent to the hospital or told about someone who got it worse well it’s hard to consider others pain when u gettin pain given to u day by day by your family your job and the so called friends who could have in your circle that say they there for you but with all that comes with some much stuff that they selfishly put you through just to prove a friendship that eventually fails in the end I can’t help to feel bitter about everything that’s happened in these last four years I lost the love of my life I got betrayed by so called best friends credit went to shit had to move back in my house because of a biomass hick who thought he knew my own grandmother better than I did when she is the person who cause me all this pain from the start I suffer PTSD From that day I got assaulted by the cops in Long Island and I’m stuck in a job that constantly harasses me but it’s so good cause it’s federal yeah okay complete bullshit on probation and can’t even travel to see my dad and he misses me so much I feel like I’ve just failed myself and everyone around me idk how to feel anymore all I know I don’t want to feel this numb and dead inside I feel like I’m living just to stay alive not to enjoy life and do great things I just feel like I’m here waiting until that day I hit the ground I’m just pray and wish my life could get better but I honestly just lost all hope in that ever being a real thing

#hurt #lost #depressed

[atlasdoe]

Hello my name is Ace and I'm rewatching Lab Rats and cant stop thinking of an R rated version of the show so here's what I would do if I was in charge

Everyone will be lgbt

I meant have you seen how they dress?? Every episode at least someone is wearing two shirts there's not one cishet person in that family

Bree is a lesbian

Chase is non binary

Adam is aro/ace

Leo is unlabeled

Actual Relationships with people outside of the family

Bree would fall in love with a female Villain

They meet during a mission without knowing who each other is

They find out who each other is but try to make it work

until the villain betrays Bree entirely

strangers to lovers to enemies excellence

Bree will have trust issues after this

Bree will in the end get with Skylar (more on her later)

LEO AND JANELLE WILL ACTUALLY GET SOME DEVELOPMENT

yknow and actual interactions beyond Leo causing chaos and Janelle rethinking her life decisions

Marcus

way more of Marcus

the first seasons main villain will be Marcus and Douglas

Marcus will be introduced way earlier on

His hatred for Leo won't be as obvious in the beginning

He'll try to tolerate him but as time goes on he gets frustrated and become more aggressive before eventually telling Leo he's bionic

We're keeping his evil eyebrows they're iconic and hilarious

Bionic Showdown will be the season finale

Mighty Med

Mighty Med will be introduced in like season three or something

One of the lab rats will get injured and taken to the hospital where they'd meet Kaz Olivier and Skylar

Idek how i feel about making superheroes cannon in this world i just want Kaz Oliver and Skylar there

And Skylar and Bree have so much potential since Skylar is someone without powers who wants them (back) and Bree is someone with powers who doesn't want them

Mighty Med will become a recurring location

Bree

I love the storylines of Bree wanting to just be a normal girl but i wish they were more consistent with it

Like she'll be blowing off missions one episode but then be telling Adam they have to train the next only to go back to not caring in another

She'll start off loving her Hannah Montana double life

But as time goes on it starts to become irritating

When she destroys her chip it'll be a lot longer until she gets it back

Similar to how it went in the show with her absent putting her brothers in danger being what made her want to rejoin the team

but it takes a while to get there. Also a lot more arguing between her Chase and Adam because of it

Cause although i get where she was coming from she did abandon the team

Adam

Adam clearly uses comedy as a coping mechanism

Which is fine and all but upon my rewatch I've noticed that during really serious scenes he hardly ever talks unless it's for a joke

idk like Leo was a funny character also but he was serious when he needed to be

I just wish Adam was the same especially when him and his siblings are about to be killed

because whenever Adam does have a line that isn't a joke it seems so out of place

Also i'd focus a bit more on Adams insecurities a little bit

This is me self projecting as an eldest sibling who has a very intelligent younger sibling

I'm telling you it's not fun when you're the dumbest in your family and everyone knows and reminds you of it

They touch on it on a few episodes but it's completely forgotten about

Chase

They'll be less fucking naive

For the most intelligent guy ever THEY GET SCREWED OVER BY HALF OF THE PEOPLE THEY BEFRIEND

Also the family will be nicer to them

and as time goes on their ego will deflate

Maybe in fear of ending up like Donald???

Leo

early seasons Leo is a gem and deserves the world

similar to Chase the family will start to actually appreciate Leo

I'm just imagining an episode where Adam Bree and Chase realise that Leo has also been through shit and that he's not their funny carless little brother anymore

Other random things

It'll be mentioned that there's only a few months between Adam and Brees age but since they're bionic it's less then 9 months so they tell the school they're twins

More interactions with Douglas Adam and Bree

Terry Cherry Perry is perfect and will remain the exact same

Adam Bree and Chase will actually be taken away during You Posted What?

Because I'm a sucker for a reunion scene

Also how they'd be treated after that episode will actually change

I was originally on board with them during the first seasons being the cool rich kids but once they get exposed they're known as freaks

But then I remembered that for the first 15 of their lives they didn't interact with anyone

And then I remembered that they once literally held a concert in school and all of the other shit they did such as Bree literally being principle for an episode and figured that then being popular doesn't actually seem that odd

Maybe something like the school just pretending that they like the Davenports just because they're rich and everyone just bails once their secrets out

But like seriously their popularity status changes more then their clothes

There will be no island

Or if there is it won't be the focus of an entire season

The lab rats will actually get injured during missions beyond just being unconscious for an episode

It'll be mentioned that originally Adam Bree and Chase were known as "Subject A B and C" until given actual names (idk if this is cannon or just a theory)

TRUMA WILL BE ADDRESSED

Spike will be used during a mission

They'll be flashbacks of the trios life growing up in the lab

MORE TASHA AND THE KIDS!!!!!

MORE GRAMAR ROSE!!!!!!

Eddy will swear

More domestic family moments

More family moments overall

This feels like an unpopular opinion but I genuinely think that the show got sibling relationships right

Like they tease and bicker and argue but they still obviously care for each other and when it matters show it

I wanna say Donald being a good father but then I realised that a good father wouldn't send his teenage kids in dangerous missions and without that there's little to no show so.... let's say that he at least tries

Also at some point one of the trio will call Donald "Dad" and he'll cry

that's all i've got for now if you hate it pls don't yell at me. I'm only on season two tho so I may continue to annoy if I come up with more

#lab rats #lab rats elite force #donald davenport #chase davenport #leo dooley #bree davenport #adam davenport #marcus davenport #disney shows #disney channel #disney xd

[imagine-a-fictional-boyfriend]

I’ll Take Care of You, Chapter 1: Visits

so, I did a thing. Been reading some Billy fics on here and damn. Y’all got me inspired. Love me some thirst for Billy Russo.

This idea came to me out of the blue, idk. It will be a multi-chapter fic but I’m not sure how long. There shall be smut, babes. I’ll also be posting to my ao3 as well (pen name: i_hear_the_birds). I do not consent to my works being copied and/or posted elsewhere.

Fic Summary: Reader works in the hospital where Billy Russo keeps his mother. They’ve caught each other’s eye. But she thinks he is the devoted son... little does she know what hides behind a handsome face and expensive suits. 

Pairing: Billy Russo x Fem!Nurse!Reader

Chapter Summary: You’ve noticed the tall, dark, handsome man visiting his mother at the hospital you work in. And you knew that he had noticed you, too. It was time for you to do something about it.

Warnings: mentions of drug use, swearing, reader is thirsty (but aren’t we all?)

Words: 1.3k

Masterlist ~~ Chapter 2

~

You bit your lip, debating what you were about to do. You’d been thinking about it for a while. Ever since he winked at you 3 weeks ago.  

You’d heard the whispers from the other nurses and the PSWs. He was one of the hospital’s biggest donors, visiting his mother who had been there for years. Even though she abandoned him as a baby, he found her in the streets and made sure she was well looked after, thanks to his successful private security company.  

She was actually one of your patients. Carla Russo. She wasn’t healthy, but she was doing okay. Drugs had ruined her immune and nervous systems; smoking had wrecked her throat and lungs. She was nonverbal. She always appeared super panicky after her son left, but you would assure her that her son would come back to see her soon. It never seemed to settle her.

Normally, he didn’t pay any attention to the staff. He’d talk to his mother’s doctors, but that was about it. But you knew that you caught his eye. There was the wink three weeks ago. There was more than that, though. He looked back at you once as he was leaving, too. You’d seen the fire in his dark eyes.

Normally, you didn’t give a second thought to anyone looking at you. But he never paid attention to anyone. Except you. With the wonderful things you’d heard about him and the fact that he was, to be frank, hot as fuck… you wanted him. Bad.

Sure, he was older than you. At least 10 years. That wasn’t crazy. You’d been a nurse for a few years now, but had only gotten the job at this private hospital a few months ago. It wasn’t the most exciting job. It had good pay though, and benefits. You had your life figured out. You didn’t care about the age difference. You knew what you wanted. You wanted him.

So, it was time to put your plan in motion. You turned the handle and opened the door.  

You pretended to be looking at the order on your clipboard. “Okay, darlin’, you ready for that mouth swab-” You looked up. “Oh gosh! Umm, I’m so sorry. I didn’t realize that Carla had a visitor.” You mumbled. Those dark eyes did take you by surprise; you didn’t have to act. It was like looking into a dark abyss.

He eyed you for a moment, his face unreadable. You felt a flush creeping up your neck. Then he smiled. “That’s all right, isn’t it, Mother?” he turned away from you to look at his mother.

Her sheets were tangled around her ankles. Her eyes were wide but they relaxed when you went over to her to fix up her bed.

“Oh, sorry about that.” He said, moving to the other side of the bed to help with the covers. “Mother looked a little flushed.”

You held the back of your hand against Carla's forehead. “Hmm, maybe a little warm. You took out your thermometer from one of the pockets in your pants and took her temperature. “No fever.” You said with a smile to her son.

He grinned. “Wonderful. What’s your name, darling?”

You tapped your name badge, and he leaned forward slightly to read it. “Pleasure to meet you, Y/N.” He held his hand out for you to shake.

You took it. “You too, Mr. Russo.”

“Please. Call me Billy.” He said, before he dropped your hand.

You blushed, and tucked your hair behind your ear. “Okay, Billy.” You cleared your throat. “Well, I am sorry to interrupt. I can come back later.”

Billy gave you a sly smile that caused your heart to race. “I sure hope that you do.”

You blushed even deeper before you left the room.

When you came back to give Carla what was on the order at the actual scheduled time, Billy was gone. You frowned at first but continued with your job. Next time.

***

The next time he visited, you abandoned the “oops, didn’t know you were here” tactic. You went up to him as he finished speaking with the doctor.

“Hi.” You said as he turned around.

“Well, hello, Y/N. It’s nice to see you, again.” He gave you a pleasant smile.  

“You, as well,” you said. Your tongue wet your bottom lip as you stared into his eyes. You noticed he had a little freckle under his right eye. “Carla will be so happy to see you.”

Billy grinned. It should be illegal for a man to be that handsome.

“I’ll leave you to it, then.” You said, stepping away from the door.

“Thanks, darlin’.” He opened the door to his mother’s room. He closed it, but not before giving you a wink.

His winks made your knees wobble.

***

At his next visit, he had brought a bouquet of flowers. A small, pretty arrangement. He didn’t have the door closed, and when he saw you passing by, he called you in.

“What can I do for you?” You asked expectantly. “Everything okay?”

Billy grinned. He plucked a flower from the bouquet and present it to you. It was a red rose, out of place from the rest of the flowers.

Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. “I-oh. For me?”

“Pretty flower for a pretty little lady.” He stated. His eyes were fiery.

You blushed before you accepted the rose. “That’s too sweet. You’re a nice guy.” You said dumbly.

He chuckled. “I just wanted to thank you for taking such good care of my mother.”

“It’s my pleasure.” You said sincerely. “I can see how much you care about her.” You smiled over at Carla in her bed. She stared back at you.

He hid a smile by running his fingers over his beard.

You brought the flower to your nose and took a whiff. “Well, thank you, Billy.”

“It’s my pleasure, Y/N.” You bit your lip, trying to stifle your grin. “Now, I’ve got to go. I look forward to seeing you again.”

***

You didn’t want to wait anymore. You knew he was into you. You knew that you’d probably have to make the first move. It wasn’t unheard of for relatives of patients to become interested in their family member’s care takers. Billy seemed like a smart guy. He probably knew not to get involved... even though he had shown his interest.  

Was it a bad idea? Probably. He did so much for the hospital, with his donations and public support. Could it jeopardize your job? Probably. Could it impact his mother’s care? Probably.

You needed to make your move before you lost your nerve. Thinking too much was ruining the mood.

He was here this evening. He usually stayed for about 20 minutes. You looked at your watch. He’d been here for just over 15.

It was almost 8pm. You were just starting your night shift. No doctors were here. Nursing staff was lighter. Today was the day to do it.

You were waiting, leaning against the counter at the nursing station for him to leave his mother’s room. When you saw him, you reached up and pulled your hair free from the elastic. You ran your fingers through your hair to smooth it out. You unbuttoned the top two buttons of your cardigan.

He watched you, and a wolfish smile took over his lips. He approached you steadily.

“Warm, are we?” he asked when he was in front of you. “You look it.”

“Pardon?” You asked, a little breathless. His cologne smelled good.

“Hot. You look hot.” He said bluntly. “You are hot.”

Normally, you wouldn’t take that as a compliment. It always sounded shallow. But coming from this tall, dark man, it set a fire to your bones.

“So are you.” You said confidently.

He grinned. “You think so?” He stepped closer to you.

You nodded.

It looked like he was about to step closer when another nurse came over to the desk to use the phone.

You cleared your throat, but Billy didn’t move away. “I know what you want, little lady.”

“What’s that?” You whispered back, tilting your face back to look at his.

“Why don’t you take me somewhere and show me?” He had a teasing look in his eyes.

You licked your lips absently. Now was your chance.

***

Author's note: Let me know what you think!! You're in for a wild ride for the next chapter ;)

#billy russo #the punisher #the punisher fanfic #billy russo x reader #billy russo x you #fanfic #billy russo fanfic #i'll take care of you #billy russo smut

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 317: My Boy Was Just Like Me

Previously on BnHA: AFO randomly blew up Lady Nagant as a good reminder of why you should never make a deal with this fucking guy, smdh. Hawks was all “well if it isn’t my two best friends, Deku and Lady Nagant, both of whom I respect and love tremendously.” Everyone was all “??” and Horikoshi was all “shh... just pretend” because it was too embarrassing for him to admit that he forgot to write a couple of set-up flashbacks I guess. Anyway so Hawks got Lady to tell them where AFO was hiding out, and everyone said goodbye to her and Overhaul, who never did get to see his boss (sorry buddy, I’ll send you a vial of my tears in the mail), and headed out to a house in the woods. AFO was all “hello Deku :) :) it sure is fun making you suffer :) :) :) anyways this is a trap”, and blew up the house. Yeah, we all here are getting reaaaaaaaal tired of your shit, AFO.

Today on BnHA: The Hawksquad and Edgeplatoon meet in a warehouse and are all “what should we do about the fact that everything sucks?” Mt. Lady is all “here’s a thought, what if we tried battling AFO with more than six people.” Hawks and Endeavor are all “great initiative, but just a friendly reminder that our friends also suck and would probably betray Deku which would suck further still.” Shouto is all “ANSWER THE PHONE DAD” and Endeavor is all “[IRONICALLY DOESN’T ANSWER THE PHONE].” Meanwhile over in Sadtown, capital of Sadland Prefecture, Japan, Deku is all “All Might, as you can clearly see I am completely fine and good, never been better in fact, definitely not caught up in the throes of an epic mental breakdown which is shutting me down emotionally, anyway so on that note I would like to leave you now goodbye!!” All Might is all “[can’t actually form any words because he’s too distraught].” Fandom is all “o(╥﹏╥)o.” Horikoshi is all “(*＾-’) 乃 [pew pew finger guns and barrel rolls into the darkness].”

sweet jesus lord

this literally doesn’t even look like Deku anymore?? this looks like Dark!Deku who shows up to fight you in that one room in the Water Temple. he looks like he’s about to crawl out of my television set and murder me with his psychic powers good lord

holy shit lmao Horikoshi is really just shrugging his shoulders and resolving last week’s cliffhanger with a single line of dialogue

fire is no one’s weakness. idk what other options you’ve got, AFO, but you’re gonna have to go back to the drawing board. maybe try bees or something. I’m just saying. we’re all expecting fire at this point but nobody is expecting bees

anyway so now they’re all sitting in some warehouse somewhere chatting about it I guess. shoutout to Horikoshi for finally giving my man Edgeshot some more dialogue at long last

well, Edgeshot, to answer your question, she exploded. so naturally she’s fine

nah just kidding, Hawks says she won’t be able to help them out much because she’s recovering from being exploded. this is the part where we all ignore the fact that Hawks got set on fire for like a full ten minutes back during the War arc and was only in the hospital for a day. anyways enjoy your temporary plot hiatus Nagant

man there’s a lot of dialogue here and I’m trying to figure out where to insert commentary but it’s kinda difficult lol. basically, Edge and the others are saying that they should gather up the other remaining heroes and get them all caught up on the whole OFA situation. which, hmmmm

like on the one hand, these guys definitely aren’t going to cut it on their own, so it’s a reasonable suggestion on the face of it. but on the other hand, do we really want to entrust the OFA secret to a bunch of other people, most of whom shat the bed during the War arc to be quite frank? is it really worth the additional risk? especially given that any one of them might go spilling the beans to the public -- or worse, betray them to AFO??

also just a quick side note here, Mt. Lady’s character development never ceases to delight me. she’s become so committed to her responsibility as a hero these days, and it fucking suits her. I genuinely consider to be one of the elites now. I mean it doesn’t hurt that all the other elites are fucking dead lol but still

wait what? Death Arms retired??

Death Arms as in the guy who was too afraid of a little fire to try and save a terrified 14-year-old kid who was slowly suffocating right before his eyes?? that Death Arms???? color me surprised. shocked, I tell you

...okay but holy fuck

Death Arms. bro. my expectations for you were low but holy shit. like I’m sorry, but I don’t even have it in me to try and pretend like I feel the slightest bit of sympathy for him or Old Man Samurai or any of those other guys today. thanks for a whole lot of nothing my dude. good riddance

(ETA: so I’m rereading this the next day and realize this comes off as kind of harsh, so let me just try to clarify. it’s not the fact that he’s quitting that bothers me, to be honest. it’s the fact that he’s quitting specifically because he feels like the public is being mean to him. that’s it.

seriously. it would be one thing if he was quitting because he was scared, because now that is human. nobody wants to die, and I doubt any amount of training can ever fully prepare someone to go up against that fear. but the thing is, he never once mentions that, or talks about the danger aspect. instead, I got the distinct vibe from this speech that Death Arms is one of those people who only became a hero because of the limelight. and I just don’t have any patience for that. if all you care about are likes and subscribes then go become a fucking youtuber or some shit. nothing wrong with that! but you didn’t; you signed up to be a hero and protect these people. they gave you their respect and admiration because they trusted you to protect them. and now that they’re no longer in the mood to worship and applaud your every move on account of them being scared shitless because they’re living in the literal end times, you decide to dip. so like okay, fine then. don’t let the door hit you on the way out. anyways lol sorry for the rant.)

anyway so yeah. perfect example of why I don’t exactly have a ton of faith in most of the remaining heroes out there lol. also let me just once again give a shoutout to my best girl Mt. Lady whom I suddenly find myself appreciating all the more

“please calm down makeste. drink some water and enjoy this fresh new jeans pun” listen Horikoshi don’t tell me what to do dammit

fine. it is a nice pun, I guess

-- damn so now Endeavor’s saying that the media is already being fed info by the retired heroes. so for some of these guys it wasn’t enough for them to abandon all the people they swore to protect and to leave their fellow heroes out in the cold; they decided they might as well actively make things worse for them while they were at it, huh. like I get wanting to spill all the dirty secrets from your old job that you just quit, but this isn’t Jeff Bezos you’re screwing over, this is a sixteen-year-old kid

-- like, yes!! this, right here!!

exactly!! let’s not forget that there are already two prior instances of this happening. Endeavor arguably deserved it, but Katsuki not so much

huh. Endeavor seems to have a more optimistic outlook regarding this than I do lol

I mean, this is the same public that didn’t hesitant to blame a kidnapped child for his own kidnapping, and then later on for being the downfall of the Symbol of Peace. but okay then

anyway so blah blah blah, more talk about how they need to use Deku as bait, which basically puts them back at square one, and then they’re all just trailing off into silence and sitting around in the dark lmao this is getting very depressing

SKDJFLSDKJ:LFKJ

SHOUTO?????

NOOOOOOOO ARE YOU KIDDING ME

OH HOW THE TURNTABLES OMG. THE GHOSTER HAS BECOME THE GHOSTEE. Endeavor you petty son of a bitch. and what a brutal cut to that flashback too. “let’s stop Touya together” nah Shouto I’ve got a better idea why don’t I abandon you in U.A. and sally off with Hawks and Jeanist to found the “let’s pretend like we’re doing something to help Deku” club, which basically consists of us sitting around making terrible decisions all day long

Shouto, honey. you deserve better my little Coca Cola can. .........but if you really do have something important you need to tell your dad you could just text it to him. all the love and support, hugs and kisses, you’re doing amazing sweetie. but if you need to pass on any vital information you can just write it down and hit send honey that’s all I’m saying love

now he’s getting another call?? -- or, no, Hawks is getting a call from All Might

ARE YOU FOR REAL HAWKS OMFG

so while you all were sitting around talking about how useless you are, the kid you’re supposed to be protecting was battling another hired gun. I see. please pardon me for one second, I have a phone call to make. the phone call is to RockLockRock and Manual. the reason for the call is to apologize for calling them the worst bodyguards ever back during the War arc. the reason for the apology is because it turns out I WAS SEVERELY MISTAKEN OMFG

JESUS CHRIST DEKU DID YOU JUST KILL THIS MAN LMAO

shoutout to Horikoshi for offscreening this fight. we get it, lol. Deku strong and scary, villains ineffectual and feeble, and AFO... [checks notes] yep, still a dick. the angst arc continues

-- the angst arc continues, SIR

jesus christ I may have to rethink all of my opinions about Deku being framed for murder in movie 3 lmao. never mind. he did it, your honor

holy fucking shit Deku. “he might blow up, so please be careful” fdlskjflk jlskdjflk lwkejflk anyway so I’ve decided the explosion running gag can stay, actually

DEKU WAIT YOU FORGOT YOUR LUNCH!!

lol why do I get the feeling some serious shit is about to go down. ALL MIGHT NEVER MIND BACK OFF I THINK HE NEEDS HIS SPACE

OH MY FUCK I GASPED OUT LOUD

NO NO NO. I KNEW THIS WAS COMING GODDAMMIT BUT NO. NEVER MIND, I CHANGED MY MIND ABOUT IT, I’M NOT READY TO CRY TODAY

shit. shit shit shit shit and OF COURSE all I can fucking think about is that stupid fucking prophecy and gahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Deku please. please please please if you really are going to leave All Might here, please be so very careful in choosing your farewell words to him now because have this sudden horrible fear that this might be the last time you ever see him alive and oh god. oh god oh god

DEKU NO, YOU’RE REALLY NOT!?!?

I HAVE NEVER SEEN ANYONE LESS FINE IN MY LIFE, ACTUALLY????

holy shit. and the fucking callback to the prophecy now. just in case we forgot. WHICH FYI, WE DIDN’T. but that’s basically confirming that this is all still very much on the table and HORIKOSHI NEVER FORGETS oh my god someone please hold me

and the fact that Deku’s flashing back to it now too, though?? because he never forgot either, because of course he didn’t, and now all this stuff is happening, and AFO’s words are getting to him, and this is literally his worst fear come to life and so of course he’s distancing himself from everyone, and now it’s finally come to even this. even the person he admires most

-- OKAY NO, FUCKING COME ON ALREADY I CAN’T TAKE THIS

I GET IT OH MY GOD, I ALREADY UNDERSTAND THE EMOTIONAL IMPACT OF THIS MOMENT WITHOUT ALL OF THE DEVASTATING FLASHBACKS THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH!! YOU ACTUALLY DO WANT ME TO CRY, HUH, IS THAT IT. THIS MAN THAT HE THINKS OF AS A FATHER, THIS MAN WHO HAS BEEN EVERYTHING TO HIM SINCE HE WAS A VERY YOUNG CHILD. EVERYTHING THEY’VE BEEN THROUGH, JUXTAPOSED AGAINST EVERYTHING DEKU IS UP AGAINST, EVERYTHING THAT’S AT RISK. LET’S JUST PUT IT ALL SIDE BY SIDE. LET’S JUST PILE ON ALL OF THE FEELS

(ETA: just a quick note that even though some of the posts I’ve read have described these as All Might’s flashbacks, I’m pretty sure they are Deku’s. most of these are scenes that only he was there for, so yeah. even though All Might is the one thinking the thoughts on the next page, the flashbacks are what’s running through Deku’s mind right now, and so we’re getting that emotion from both of them, which makes it extra devastating lol.)

wait, what???

WHAT??? do you really think that’s why he’s been so determined to protect you this entire time?? simply because you’re his successor?

-- oh no wait lol I think I got that mixed up, this is All Might saying that Deku feels the need to protect him. well that makes more sense lol

oh my god I cannot

his last words. his last words to him. and we can’t even see if he is smiling, like All Might always encouraged him to do. but what are the odds he can’t actually bring himself to do it. what are the odds he’s actually crying. oh god this scene is going to rip my heart out and STOMP on it in the anime isn’t it. Deku’s VA is going to full on murder me with emotion. not that there’ll be much of me left to murder after the thorough job that Horikoshi has already done here

YOU’RE CRYING. DEKU IS LEAVING ALL MIGHT AND IGNORING HIS OUTSTRETCHED HAND AND YOU’RE CRYING. AND BY “YOU” I MEAN “ME”, FUCK

nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope nope no words just feels just a big ol’ pile of feels. I do not have the strength. future me... [broadly gestures] good luck with all that

(ETA: LOL, WELL THEN.

what breaks my heart here is All Might. All Might, and everything he’s been through, and history repeating itself, and forcing him to live this moment from both sides because he wasn’t strong enough to fix things.

Toshinori had only just turned eighteen when Nana died. like, I feel like we don’t mention this enough. the All Might we know is a sixty-something-year-old man, and so everyone always talks about him like he’s basically been an adult forever. but he was a child when he met Nana. and he was still just a child when she died. barely a year older than Deku is now. younger than Mirio was when we first met him.

and we don’t talk about that. we don’t talk about how devastating that was for him. and we don’t talk about how the reason he grew up to become so reserved and withdrawn -- for all that he always tried so hard to outwardly project the image of a bold, confident, smiling hero -- was specifically because of what AFO did to him. because AFO targeted him in the exact way that he is now targeting Deku. because that’s what he does. he goes after every new user of OFA, and he finds out what’s most important to them, and then he destroys it. and for Toshinori, that was Nana. if you’ve read All Might Rising, you know that AFO basically killed her in front of him (and only killed her, while letting Toshinori and Gran get away). Toshinori (while crying) later says she was like a mother to him. and interestingly enough, during this same conversation, Gran tells Toshinori that he can see “that madness in [his] eyes” when Toshi talks about becoming strong enough to defeat AFO. madness in his eyes. sound familiar??

what’s happening to Deku now is the exact same thing that happened to Toshinori when he was a boy. AFO tried every bit as hard to break him as he’s trying with Deku now. “the path you’ve chosen is a thorny one. every battle grinds away at your soul with no end in sight.” we don’t talk about how Toshinori experienced this same thing for forty fucking years. and all the while isolating himself, exactly like Deku is doing now. pushing people away, exactly like Deku. because he never had anyone who was able to reach out and pull him back. and those words that he now finds himself frozen and unable to speak -- “don’t push yourself”; “you can rest” -- are the same words that no one ever said to him until decades later, when it was already far too late to make any difference.

everything that Deku is experiencing now is what Toshinori also went through. and it’s only now, as he watches it happen to his student, the boy he loves like a son, that he’s finally starting to realize the full extent of how wrong it was. you shouldn’t have to fight alone. you shouldn’t have to bear that kind of enormous burden alone. you shouldn’t have to push yourself, and you can rest. you can rest.

but it’s too late. just as he’s finally coming to understand it all, it’s all too fucking late. and he can’t say the words, he doesn’t know how to say the words, and then just like that, Deku is gone.

and he’s alone. again.)

I can’t. this can’t be their goodbye. I’m not ready. for this to be how they finally part, and then they never see each other again except in OFA. how is that fair. how is that fair. how is that fair

fuck me. lol. how many pages are left in this thing. let’s just wrap this up lol. so now of all the times for this fucking guy to finally show up

I can’t believe Stain has been here literally this entire time hiding behind this random wall and cutting onions. that was you who was cutting the onions, right. no need to answer that we’ll just say it was

HORIKOSHI JUST END THE CHAPTER PLEASE I’M OUT OF SPOONS. YOU HURT ME SO GOOD AND I LOVE YOU FOR IT BUT YOU NEED TO LET ME GO NOW SO I CAN BEGIN THE PROCESS OF TRYING TO PUT MY LIFE BACK IN ORDER HERE. SO WHERE ARE WE CUTTING TO NOW WHAT IS HAPPENING

Stain did you also let AFO give you a new quirk. what’s with you guys. do you like blowing up

oh nvm lol because they were talking about THIS GUY ohhhhhh my fucking god

THAT’S BECAUSE HE’S SAD, LINDA!! jesus

omfg. and so yes, good, the chapter is ending here now on page 15. for once I am FULLY on board with that lmao

anyway so tune in next week for more adventures of Werewolf Deku!! that is, assuming we don’t finally cut back to U.A. at long last, which is actually a strong possibility considering that this chapter will likely mark the end of volume 31. it sure wouldn’t kill Horikoshi to start giving us some hope after everything he’s just put us through lol. KACCHAN COME GET YA BOY

#bnha 317 #all might #midoriya izuku #and endeavor and hawks and mt. lady and all the rest of them I guess #literally forgot all about them by the end lol #bnha #boku no hero academia #bnha meta #bnha spoilers #mha spoilers #bnha manga spoilers #makeste reads bnha #this wound up so long lmao I'm so sorry

[emotionallyits2009]

supernatural/house crossover. dean spends the whole episode trying to have sex with thirteen who's instead trying to have sex with mary who's trying to have sex with foreman who's trying not to talk to anyone. chase absolutely strikes out outside of all of this. it would be funny if cas & wilson hook up bc of the insane emotional fallout, but it's hard to imagine it actually happening, and it might actually be more gutting to their respective unhealthily dependent bestie if they become genuine friends instead and share feelings and recipe links. i would like to think rowena & cutthroat bitch hook up because it's hot, but it might be too much of a putting a cat in front of a mirror scenario.

but cuddy & crowley fuck.

okay crossover episode where dean comes down with a mysterious disease and cas can’t heal him for random plot reasons so he has to go to the hospital. first of all Cameron is the ULTIMATE #icanfixhim girl so she latches onto dean. she’s a shark and his trauma is blood in the water. she tries to make him talk about his daddy issues while he just deflects and makes sexist comments. this is what 90% of season 1-3 house episodes are like so we’re off to a great, in-character start.

house calls dean a closet case within two minutes of meeting him and dean throws something. when cas shows up he makes some vaguely homophobic comments about the two of them. however cas and dean’s relationship is paralleled heavily to wilson and house’s relationship all episode. wilson and cas end up in a scene together where cas is like “I feel so helpless because I can’t heal him :(“ and wilson, who doesn’t know this is about Literally Healing Him and thinks it’s metaphorical is like “well you can’t help people if they don’t want to be helped 😔”. idk what issue house and wilson are going through but it’s something about not being able to communicate.

by the end of the episode wilson has talked cas into having a semi-honest conversation with dean where he’s like “I feel like it’s my fault that you’re in pain right now because normally I would be able to heal you” and dean is like “c’mon, buddy, you know it’s not your fault, right?” yeah okay and then this ties back into house and wilson (i’m thinking out loud here) where they have a conversation at the very end of the episode where house is like “i KNOW you’re blaming yourself for me being [back on vicodin] right now. when will you learn that you CAN’T fix me you can’t take responsibility for other people’s fucked up actions!”

crowley gets sent in to distract cuddy while house’s gang does some dangerous unnecessary medical procedure and sam & cas are trying a magic ritual solution. and they do fuck. #milf4milf

SOMEHOW the diagnosis goes back to John. like dean makes an offhand comment about something his dad used to do and house has his epiphany and is like you idiot! why didn’t you mention that your dad used to leave you alone with your brother in dirty motel rooms for weeks on end! CLEARLY you have a delayed onset of Abandoned-In-Dirty-Motels-As-A-Child-For-Weeks-On-End Disease and would have been died of it in the next hour if I, the greatest doctor in the world, had not caught it. luckily the treatment is very simple and you will be up and walking around tomorrow even though right now five of your organs are failing.

finally, during the episode SAM hooks up with thirteen (they’ve been having side conversations about death and feeling like you don’t have a choice in what’s gonna happen to you all episode) and at the end her Huntington’s diagnosis is revealed (this is a big au okay) so his dick game remains positively deadly.

#hotgirlgarak #housenatural #this post feels STRAIGHT out of 2010 living up to my url

[tag-that-oc]

Talk.about.yout.fav.oc.right.now.🔫.

my fav? how do I choose a favorite?

kidding, I will talk about one of my favs at random

since I've already mentioned Cyra and Dawson on here before, I think I'll go with umm... oh no I can't decide between Razi and Arvid 🥺

I'll go with Arvid! oh my baby son boy (gently holds)

so, Arvid is half alien (I say half but he's more like three quarters, actually,) and he's a second generation character to mine and Todd's collab project.

warning for a little bit of trauma lol

Arvid was bullied pretty badly in school. one of his peers pretended to be his friend to play jokes and stuff on him, and it all escalated to one point in middle school where Arvid finally tried to stand up for himself, but he was stabbed by the "friend" and hospitalized because of it.

Arvid's whole persona is "I'm super tough don't fuck with me" but on the inside he is *so* soft. he's also a gay disaster. he has a boyfriend named Izan and they are so freaking adorable together, but he also has crushes on other guys (don't worry, they're polyamorous :3 ) and Arvid cannot talk about his feelings worth a crap. he keeps them all bottled up and believes he can't cry because of being teased for it as a kid.

Arvid is very close with Amanda (his mother and Todd's oc), and he used to be close with one of his sisters, Amber, but she abandoned him and caused a lot of drama in the family because of it. she has since come back into Arvid's life, but he is having a hard time trusting her again after being hurt the first time

Arvid has the greatest power ever. he can summon meat. that's right, just ground beef right in his hand. (no but seriously, Arvid hates this power and wishes he had something cooler slfjkskdksn)

he loves bugs! Arvid has a pet tarantula, but he also studies entomology as a hobby and is so fascinated with watching bugs and helping them and stuff.

Arvid is the embodiment of "be gay, do crimes" and he and his friends do a lot of thieving, vandalism, and bastardry

oh, also! Arvid is part of the same story as Dawson, Cyra, Niserum, and Ares. idk if anyone remembers, but Ares and Niserum want to get rid of all superpowers and people with those superpowers, which includes Arvid (even if his power is kinda weird) and Amanda. Dawson ends up being forced to kill Arvid and Amanda, so that's fun :3c

he is one of my favs so I have made so many things for him here is my son!

the last one is Arvid and his boyfriend (future husband) Izan AH LOOK AT THEMMM

also have his collage AND the collage I made for him and his boyfriends (Izan, Avery, and Razi) because now I'm in Arvid mode and want to share

#someday you'll all get tired of me talking about my ocs on here sldjskdkkd #anonymous #not oc tag #gayben uh. rambles #gaybens ocs

[haleigh-sloth]

Hi 🙋‍♀️ my friend thinks that Dabi is going to be put down(killed) and Endeavor will be the one who’s going to do it as an act of atone. I told her that it was a horrific take because that would be a horrible way to atone and two your essentially saying that Endeavor should re-kill the son he failed and basically killed by his actions of neglect/abuse as a parent which would not be a good path to take! I also stated that three villains are being set up to be saved. She still doesn’t believe me, and asked if I could get a better perspective. So I’m here begging 🙏🏻 🥺 for your input please? Your definitely a lot more perspective and have a better eye than I!

Hey! So I’m going to answer everything, but first ask your friend to provide evidence of this, and to also explain how any of that would be even remotely acceptable to portray in a story that is aimed toward a very large, young, impressionable audience, in which a portion has undoubtedly experienced abuse in their own lives. How would those people feel reading that? What kind of message does that send? Horikoshi isn’t like a writing genius or anything, but he is not THAT incompetent. I mean...do give him credit where it’s due. He’s been building up their redemptions for a long time and he’s already established that as the next narrative challenge for Shouto, Ochaco, and Midoriya. I’m not going to say anything about your friend’s way of thinking because I can’t tell by the way your ask is worded if she believes that’s how it SHOULD go (which is....not good) or if she just has no faith in the writing (which is understandable but I’m gonna try to relieve some of those anxieties). In order to remain polite and civil I’m gonna go with the ladder and assume she just has no faith in Horikoshi, which is understandable, but not necessary! I hope you’re comfortable because this is probably going to be longer than I am anticipating, but oh well. 

Anyway, I’ll start with establishing what is deemed acceptable in the world of BNHA as far as killing goes.

*clears throat* It’s not fucking acceptable. Never was, never will be.

Look, please pinpoint to me where a pro-hero in the story has killed a villain and it was viewed as acceptable. And before you point at Hawks, I’m going to direct you here, here, and here. And there are so so SO many more posts I could find and link you to that explain my point further on that matter, but I won’t do that unless it’s asked of me. Regardless, Hawks murdering Twice was not acceptable, it was not portrayed as such, it was not viewed as such by the characters within the story. Therefore, it was not acceptable. And I’m fairly certain Hawks has a really rough road ahead of him because of his terrible choice, so prepare yourself for that.  But where was I? Oh yeah, establishing whether or not it’s acceptable to kill:

I mean there are more, but I don’t have all the time in the world. Tell her to read the story from the beginning and pay attention to what the story is telling its readers  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ 

Now, we’ve established that heroes in BNHA do NOT kill. That is not what being a hero means in THIS story. Now, what else is something important in BNHA that has repeatedly gotten focus?

Family.

To me personally, the most important callout to the importance of protecting your family is here:

He’s calling out all heroes, but he’s saying this in front of Endeavor. Important. Note that. There’s an entire subplot dedicated to the importance of portraying that putting your family first is the utmost responsibility of a parent. Outside of that subplot, we are shown the very dire consequences of what happens when parents abandon and reject their children.

Exhibit A: Toga

Exhibit B: Toya, or Dabi

Exhibit C: Tenko, or Tomura

These adults are the result of parents who failed their families.

Look, regardless of what people want to say the story is about: whether it’s about heroes vs. villains (it’s not), or about Midoriya graduating UA and becoming the number 1 hero (it’s not), or about Midoriya mastering his quirk (it’s not), there is no denying that BNHA is about heroes SAVING others and parents protecting their FAMILY. 

Horikoshi made it a point to establish a clear difference between the adults and the children in BNHA. He also made a point to show ALL THREE VILLAINS’ origin stories and showed us that all it took was ONE BAD DAY when they were CHILDREN. There is literally a chapter titled “All it takes is one bad day” specifically to drill this into your head. Toga’s life went downhill after attacking that boy in middle school from suppressing her biological nature for so long. Toya’s life went downhill when his flames nearly killed him. Tenko’s life went downhill when his quirk activated and killed his whole family. All it took was one bad day in these children’s lives to completely ruin their futures and take any and every chance away from them at a normal life. 

So with the strong focus on heroes saving people and parents failing their children, why why WHY would it ever be acceptable for Enji to KILL his SON? That not only repeats the first mistake made (Toya’s death), but also negates ALL of the narrative focuses of the entire story. I just...that’s a very very deep disconnect that I can’t force closed unless your friend chooses to look deeper than surface level reading. And it’s not just BNHA that has narrative themes and focuses throughout the story. That’s ANY story you read. Well, any good story at least. I’m not a writer by any means but even I know the basic rules of story telling: 

Leave a message for your readers. Give your story a goal. 

Otherwise it’s just words and pictures on paper that don’t mean anything. 

So I gave you the basics of what BNHA is about, now I’ll give the specific moments that directly tell you that Toya, Toga, and Tomura are going to be saved and redeemed. 

Toya:

Toga:

Tomura:

Now....does your friend really think these panels up here just mean nothing? Because that’s not how manga works. The panels have meaning, especially the ones given the most attention to drawing detail, the ones given the most space on a page. All of these were given their own big moments in their respective chapters. Toga is going to be saved by Ochaco, Toya is going to be saved by his baby brother, and Shigaraki is going to be saved by our main character Midoriya. It’s clear as day right there. 

Now I want to take it back to the Todoroki family for just a bit once more. Their entire subplot revolves around reunification. That has been the established endgame since Shouto’s origin chapters. And honestly? You don’t even have to be smart to figure this out. Like when you see Rei in the hospital, you already assume that she’s going to get out and come home at some point within the story, making the family whole again. THEN you learn about Toya and you learn that he’s ALIVE after ten years of being presumed dead. You really think HE isn’t going to be brought home just like his mother was??? Fam, that is the established goal of the Todoroki Family Subplot. There is no denying this, it is there in the text, and it is not even a little bit subtle. Horikoshi is not subtle. At all. With anything. Ever.  

However, no matter how much textual evidence we are given, there are still people living in denial because it’s either A. Not the direction they want, or B. They really just aren’t grasping the writing. Either way, the redemption set ups are there, whether they like it or not. At this point I’m convinced that the only way to shut villain-haters down is to wait til the last chapter has come out and the villains are fine, Toya is reunited with his family, Toga is alive and well and finds community with the other kids (at least that’s what I predict), and Shigaraki is alive and well and surrounded by people who care about him, a family if you will. Other than just waiting for that moment, idk what else it’s gonna take for the bad takes to stop. 

Now here’s my reality check disclaimer:

Horikoshi could screw us all and just kill the villains off. But that would be bad writing and also ruin the ENTIRE STORY. And believe me I will bitch and bitch until I am six feet under and I will continue to bitch about it in whatever afterlife awaits me. But seriously..he won’t do that. Not to mention I have a million other reasons somewhat unrelated to the writing but more so to Horikoshi himself as to why I believe with all of my being that the three villains are going to get a happy ending, but that’s a different discussion for a different time. This post is already long as shit. 

I hope your friend will look a little deeper at the story so she can enjoy it for what it is. The story has flaws, the Todoroki subplot is definitely a MESS right now because of the focus on Endeavor 🤢, but I believe it will clean itself up and be great in the end. The redemption arcs of the villains are the most interesting thing about BNHA and I know I speak for a lot of others and not just myself when I say this but, the villains are the only reason a LOT of people are still even invested in the story to begin with. If it weren’t for them? We’d all be ghost. So, do with that what you will. I hope this helps ease your anxieties a little bit and helps your friend understand what to pay attention to in the writing.

#LONG ASS POST #SORRY #bnha #bnha meta #bnha asks #boku no hero academia #todoroki touya #todoroki shouto #todoroki enji #todoroki rei #todofam #shigaraki tomura #shigaraki redemption #shimura tenko #toga himiko #league of villains #bnha league of villains #bnha lov #anonymous