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backwardsbread · 1 month

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CHRIST! your writing is absolutely gorgeous, i love it so much <3

i was wondering if i could request a husk x reader angst, where it's extermination day and reader gets severely injured while protecting husk? kinda something like an executioner lunges at husk while his back is turned so reader saves him from dying but in turn ends up dying instead? as the reader is dying they're also trying to comfort husk, telling him that they wanted to save him. probably a scene where husk is shaking the readers dead body begging them to wake up, that they were supposed to be the one who died and not them????

(i am a sucker for husk angst, and there isn't enough of it ; ;)

Oh my- oh my gosh- LISTEN- I KNOW IM USUALLY A FLUFF WRITER

But this is awesome and I’m a sucker for angst. Yall have no idea. >:)

Ask and you shall receive~

Husk x GN!Reader ANGST

~Live Happy~

Warnings‼️:Angst, gore, blood, heartbreak, descriptions of death, descriptions of grief, not a happy ending, the author is TERRIBLE at writing fight scenes, swearing, Pentious’ is mentioned but barely acknowledged.

~Semi proofread~

Extermination day was here.

The hotel was prepared, armed with the hotel’s residents and Rosie’s Rebellious Cannibals. The sky split, golden light pouring down on Hell’s dark cities. The sight would’ve been beautiful under any other circumstance, something you had hoped to see when death crept up on you. But as villainous angels swooped down from the portal to the golden realm, reality struck like a knife.

As much as you wished to be living afterlife comfortably, with no threats or potential harm to come,

You weren’t completely alone.

“Now! For yours souls!” Vaggie shouts, causing you to grip your angelic weapon tighter. Adrenaline pumps through your veins making your heart quicken its pace. Your hands trembled slightly against your hold on the weapon. The moment didn’t feel real, how had it come to this? You had tunnel vision towards the direction of the portal.

“You ready for this, hot shot?” You hear to your side, making your head snap in the direction where it came from.

There you saw Husk, offering a grin to you. Of course he was nervous, equally as nervous as you were. Husk’s eyes shook wildly with anxiety, gripping some explosive dice in his palm. You felt a boost of confidence, knowing that whatever was to happen, Husk would be there.

Your relationship with Husk only started when you found the hotel on a whim. You had ‘joined’ the princess’ team when you just needed a place to stay and keep safe. So much that did for you when war was about to commence.

But you wouldn’t have traded your impulsive decision to go to the hotel for anything. Sure, the reason the Hazbin Hotel existed was for redemption, something that felt so unfit for you. However, through your stay, you made friends and memories that put your old life to shame.

Husk being one of the most influential players in you staying and fighting for the hotel. At first Husk was tough, hard as nails and sharp as a knife. You shared a few drinks with him on late nights, not really speaking much until you were too tipsy to comprehend words leaving your mouth. It was something Husk was used to. Sinners coming to his bar, getting drunk, and spilling their guts to him.

Husk found your company different than the rest of the hotel members. You were oftentimes quiet, which he could appreciate. But you had a way of being able to sense his emotions. Anytime he was frustrated, he found you somehow just knowing and trying to find a way to calm him. Your company was more intoxicating than any liquor he could get his hands on in Hell.

Did Husk gain certain feelings for you just because you were willing to listen to him? Highly possible.

Was he ever going to act on those feelings? Not in this afterlife, maybe the next.

He couldn’t bear the thought of you guys growing distance all because he couldn’t get a grip. He could put on a brave face and stayed mature, never willing to ruin the bond you both shared.

Unaware of the effects Husk had on you by his little comment, a smirk works its way on your lips. You chuckle, twirling the angelic weapon in your hand.

“As I’ll ever be, whiskers.” You comment back, letting Husk roll his eyes at the nickname you called him. He had no time to come back with any witty banter.

There were more pressing matters at hand.

Surviving.

Battle started, angels swooping down with weapons at the ready. Aimlessly swinging and stabbing at demons ready to rebel. You were never a fantastic fighter, but if meant for your soul, for you to see afterlife better than this, you’d fight until your legs couldn’t carry you anymore.

It didn’t take long for Alastor to form a shield around the hotel and its rebellious sinners. His laugh echoed loud against the shields walls that formed, causing the angels trapped inside and be slaughtered. The sound of explosions, the smell of dirt and angelic blood, it was intoxicating. Revenge felt so sweet as you plunged your angelic weapon into an angel’s gut, letting them fall from grace. You yanked your weapon out, the silver now coated in liquid gold.

When the angel’s movements came to a halt, you couldn’t help but grin. It felt so freeing, all those years in Hell you stayed scared and hidden. Now it was the angels who looked weak by your hand. Your senses filled with empowerment, hope for the future as you continued your slaughter.

With a loud boom, the ground beneath you shook. Hell’s red skies got brighter as Alastor’s shield slowly cracked away, broken by Adam who wore a sinister grin. Your eyes widened, as more angels found the opportunity to swoop down and attack. You took a few steps back, pupils beginning to shake.

There were so many of them.

Your shoulder collided with Husk’s as you backed up. You stumbled a bit, looking over at Husk, gripping your weapon tighter in case he was an enemy. Husk put his hands up in defense. You relax once you see who you had bumped into, seeing no threat. Husk sees the panic in your eyes, how your body started to freeze in fear of any movement that would cause attention to you. He gently grabs your forearm. Despite how unsure he was about how this was all going to play out, he wanted- needed- to keep you safe. And part of that was making sure you were not frozen in fear, waiting for an angel to come attack you.

“Hey, hey. It’s okay.. we’ve got this. Just stick with me, okay?” Husk held your forearm, pulling you closer to him. Your body, like a dog to a dinner bell, instinctively relaxed under his touch. How long had he had this power over you? Even in war, Husk’s presence felt so warm.

Your eyes catch something behind Husk, making them widened. You pull on Husk’s arm, dragging him behind you. With a need to protect, you plunge your angelic weapon into an angel’s throat, that had just been behind Husk, ready to strike. The angel falls limp against your weapon, falling to the ground. Golden blood sprays out of the angel’s neck as your rip your weapon out. You wipe your face with your sleeve, looking back at Husk who looked shocked yet amused by your sudden attack.

“Stick together.” You say, a new sense of accomplishment running through your veins at Husk’s silent approval.

And that is how you fought, making sure you had your friend’s backs whenever they needed. You weren’t alone. You were all fighting for a cause you weren’t sure you really believed in. This wasn’t just a fight for Charlie though. It was to prove that despite how something beyond you decided you were demonic, you weren’t helpless.

Holy light struck the ground, making it shake once again. You looked up to see Adam, shooting rays of golden light down at you and your team. Where was Alastor?? Wasn’t he supposed to be fending off Adam-

Realization hits like a freight train. It got harder and harder to fend off the angels, especially now with Adam’s brutal attacks. You watch Pentious’ ship suddenly start to fly its way right towards Adam.

“That crazy motherfucker..” You hear AngelDust mutter, watching Pentious’ ship head straight towards Adam, its death ray lighting up. In the blink of an eye, the ship disappeared with a single shot of holy light towards it. Your eyes widen as your heart shatters a bit.

Charlie falls to her knees, Vaggie moving down to comfort her. You hang your head low, swearing under your breath and wiping away the tears that threatened to fall. You didn’t even have time to grieve the loss that just happened. You hear Charlie growl under her breath, losing control of herself over the loss of someone she had promised to protect.

She called for Razzle and Dazzle, the two once small rams turning to dragons as Charlie let her true colors show. Vaggie and Charlie flew off towards Adam, a thirst for revenge of a fallen solider evident.

But that left you, Husk, Angel, and Cherri down alone, with the army of cannibals whose numbers were quickly falling. You were exhausted but had no time to pause, each exorcist attacking right after another. As you stabbed through another exorcist, each breath made your lungs feel like fire, unable to get a real breath in.

“Agh—! Fuck-!” You hear Husk swear, causing you to turn in his direction. You watch an exorcist pull him down by his ankle out of the sky. The exorcist yanked Husk to the ground. Husk was quick to regain himself, reaching into his pocket for more explosive dice. Before he can grab it out, the clever exorcist stabbed their spear through Husk’s wing.

Husk cried out in pain, now being pinned down on his stomach. The spear had gone through the base of his wing and now dug into the ground below him, making him unable to move without tearing his wing in two. Husk panted, also out of breath from the intense battle. He tried to get up, but the exorcist’s boot shoved into his back, keeping him down.

The exorcist chuckles in sickening amusement. They reach down towards an angel’s body, grabbing a dagger. Husk’s eyes widened as he found no escape from the angel. Heart pumping hard in his chest as if it was the last time it would be able to.

Your legs burned, your chest heaved with unsteady breaths, and all you could see was red. Your feet carry you, your body moving before your mind can keep up. Gripping your weapon, you stab it through the exorcist who had Husk down. Stabbing where their shoulder met their arm. The exorcist cried out in pain, looking back at you. The exorcist made a sloppy swing with their dagger in your direction. You catch their arm, swinging them back behind you. The exorcist landed on their injury, a loud snap making them scream out in agony.

Husk barely saw what you did, his vision fuzzy from the adrenaline high. He tried to move, but yelped when his wing started to tear because of the exorcists spear. Your attention falls back on Husk, panicking when you saw the spear keeping him against the ground. You bend down, grabbing the handle of the spear, you hesitate. You look down at Husk apologetically.

“This is gonna hurt.” Giving Husk no other time to process, you pull to spear out of his wing. Husk swears at you loudly, wings shrinking in towards his body as blood pours down his wings, the crimson color blending in with his feathers. Meanwhile, the exorcist who had you had tossed to the side, weakly got to their knees.

“You fucking-..” Husk growled out, shooting a glare at you. His harsh eyes turn to confused ones as he watched you go over to a fallen exorcist, ripping their shirt. You’re quick to move back to Husk, wrapping the thing cloth around his wing. It was barely able to stay due to the size of Husk’s wings, but it would due until the battle was over. The bloodthirsty exorcist made a weak attempt to crawl over to you and Husk, gripping their dagger tight.

“Thank you..” Husk mutters, eyes softening towards you as your tightened the cloth around his wound. You look towards him, offering a small reassuring smile.

“No problem, pussycat.” You shoot back, standing to your feet. Husk rolled his eyes but couldn’t help the grin on his face. You take in a deep breath, holding your hand out to Husk.

“Now let’s-!” Sharp. A pulsing sharp pain in your gut that twisted violently before being yanked out. Blood sprayed onto Husk’s face from the harsh stab.

Warmth. Warm blood that gushed from the fresh open wound, coating your skin, making it shine like rubies. Hot tears involuntarily fell from the pain that coursed through your body.

Shock. All you could hear was ringing, all you could see were tears. Your knees gave out as the angel behind you lifted their weapon to deliver a final blow to you. With the sound of a muted gunshot, you felt the angel fall against the back of your legs.

Cold. Your body chilled in Hell’s fiery atmosphere. It almost felt refreshing if the pain wasn’t sitting beside it. A hand came over your gut, where your stomach split, hand getting soaked in blood. You leaned forward, hand that wasn’t over your wound catching you so you wouldn’t face-plant. Lifting your hand, you saw pretty red liquid running down your arm.

Blank. You couldn’t move, you couldn’t speak, you couldn’t hear. Letting out a breath felt like torture as you coughed painfully, blood spitting out of your mouth. You barely even felt strong arms lifting you and sprinting out of lines of fire. Black patterned wings acting as a shield to you and..

Husk.. you look up, seeing Husk with panicked eyes. He looked to be shouting, but despite his close proximity, you couldn’t seem to hear his words. Husk ran to the side of the hotel, panting as he did a quick glance to make sure no angel’s were following him. He bent down with you in his arms, your eyes staring blankly back at him.

Adrenaline stopped pumping, causing more intense pain to shoot through your body. You back felt like it was on fire. It felt like your guts were being ripped out slowly.

“Hey! Don’t you do this! No no no no, come on now!” Husk’s voice finally made way to your ears. Your eyes darted to his. He was frantic, looking at your injury then around as if someone could come help. He pressed his palm down on your injury, making you scream in pain.

“I know I know I know— shit!” Husk shielded you with his wings. His weak attempts in stopping your bleeding felt hopeless.

God- his eyes still seemed to draw you in. Even while frantic, you felt nothing but love for Husk. Love? Geez why did death always have to interrupt. Why did it always make you realize things a little too late? You didn’t want to die. You weren’t ready to find out what was beyond afterlife. Was there nothing? Was it light? Was it dark? Was it the heaven you always wished to see? In the back of your mind you knew it was the end, but your life felt less important than Husk. You couldn’t just leave him, not like this.

Your bloodied hand reached up to hold his cheek, letting him look down at you. You felt his breaths coming out fast and shaky, his hand pressing down harder as your blood pooled around his fingers. You hissed in pain, grip tightening on him. Your breath came out slow and labored, trying hard to keep strong in the last moments you’d have with the one soul you didn’t want to leave.

“It’s okay..” You managed to whisper, immediately regretting speaking from the way it made your body move. Husk shook his head quickly.

“No, no. Shut the fuck up, okay? Don’t go saying anything, we’ll fix this..! I’ll fix it, just give me time, please.” Husk glanced towards where your friends were battling. Now that they were down two more people, heavy hitters at that, they struggled to keep the angelic army at bay.

As if you could read Husk’s mind, like you always did, you spoke, “They need you, Husk.. don’t leave them..” you mutter, your thumb moving shakily to rub Husk’s cheek. Husk shook his head again at you, pulling you close to his body.

“It— it can wait. I’m not leaving you here! Are you crazy?? Just wait and I’ll-!”

“Husker.” Husk’s eyes dart down to you. Looking you up and down, his heart dropped. Your eyelids and body felt like dumbbells. A weight on your body that made it slow. His hand covered in your blood as the wound only spilled more. But despite it,

You smiled.

Husk couldn’t take it, he couldn’t keep losing people. He couldn’t lose you, not like this. Not for this cause you seemingly were dragged into. Why were you smiling at him??

“Stop it. Stop, no- quit it! You’re not doing this to me!” Husk was desperate for any salvation. He’d repent, he’d quit booze, he’d do anything to keep you here and breathing. He watched you blink heavily, trying to stay awake for him. You leaned your head into him.

“I’m sorry, Husk.. I can’t..” your body felt so heavy. Everlasting slumber approaching, making your body feel numb. You couldn’t even feel the pain anymore, only Husk’s arms around you, desperately trying to keep you here.

“Stop! What am I supposed to do??” Tears pricked at Husk’s eyes and were quick to stream down his face, “How am I supposed to live this Hell without you??” He asked desperately, as if the guilt of dying would somehow convince your body not to give up.

You smile to him felt like a taunt. A tease of the future ones that could’ve been. “The same way you did with me..”

“Happily.”

Husk felt frozen at your words, tears falling from his face and onto your body. How was he supposed to.. no not like this. He couldn’t. Not without you there. Your absence would be a void he would never be able to fill. He slowly shook his head, sobs wracking his body that he desperately tried to keep back. You did nothing but close your eyes, pressing your face against his stomach.

“Eternity is too long to suffer for its entirety..” you mutter, breath shallow as your grip on Husk loosened. “Don’t let me.. make you suffer..” you mumble, voice barely audible.

Warmth. Comfort. Soft was the last breath you let out, all strength leaving your body as your body relaxed to rest. Your heavy eyes drooping nearly shut as all life behind them faded to whatever was after this Hell. Husk watched your body fall limp, his grip on your growing tighter in false hope you would hold him back.

Words unspoken. Husk kept his wings around your body, letting out choked sobs while he whispered how sorry he was. How he couldn’t protect you. Hell had taken his pride, his soul, and now his heart. Hell tore everything away from him.

Whatever made him deserve it, he’d go back and do it over and over again to get it right.

If it meant you could’ve been there.

——————————BONUS———————————

Husk flipped a light switch, the sudden harsh light making him groan and squint. He rubbed his eyes, walking down a memorized path just outside the entrance of the hotel. He never was a morning person, he hated getting up so early just to be met with a raging headache from the prior night. He grumbled to himself, going over to a bench at the side of the hotel. He sat down with a huff, setting down the extra mug of coffee he had made next to him.

“Mornin’..” He mumbled, taking a sip of his own coffee that, the warm liquid making his body relax. His greeting was met with silence, something that felt all too familiar ever since the last extermination day. He sighs, leaning back against the bench, and looking up at the wall.

Where a portrait of you was hung right next to Sir Pentious’.

“So you’ll never believe the night I had..” Husk started, going on about last nights quarrels in the hotel. Keeping you updated on any events you were missing out on. Just how it used to be.. the gossip you would share with one another. Quietly judging the other hotel attendees, ranting about your day, or whispering sweet words to another.

An effort to soothe Husk’s grief at the loss of you.

“..and because Lucifer is stayin’ I keep finding these fucking rubber ducks everywhere..! The guy seriously has a problem, I tell ya.. you’d get a kick out of it.” Husk finished off his little rant, sipping the last of his coffee. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the lobby lights inside the hotel flick all the way on, showing someone (most likely Charlie) was up as well. Husk sighed, looking up at your portrait again.

A painted smile on the canvas, one he missed the warmth and comfort of. He held his knees, slowly getting up. He stretched his arms over his head, before reaching down and grabbing your cup of coffee, still full but now gone cold. He gently raised the glass a bit towards your portrait.

“Live Happy..” he muttered, a motto he now followed ever since your dying words. As much as the words made his heart feel heavy, he would try. Try and live happy.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel headcanon #hazbin #hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin x you #hazbin x reader #husk #husk x reader #hazbin hotel husk #hazbin husk #hazbin husk x reader #husk x you #hazbin hotel angst #hazbin angst #husk angst

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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automaticllamacycle · 5 months

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May Jesus forgive me for what I’m about to say.

Making matty jealous at an industry party until he spanks you and fucks you so hard afterwards

I am going to be combining this ask with this one that I got because they will fit will together hehe : literally matty just fucking you RELENTLESSLY like that man is not stopping until your actually crying like tears are flowing down your face

Disclaimers: reader is quite drunk during the sex, but I'm acting like this is in the dom/sub au I (kinda) have going on so they are in a very committed relationship and have discussed situations like this before! Anyways now onto the horny thoughts (even though im writing this more like a traditional fic)

this ended up being like 1.5k words. It is now 2am so it is NOT proof read, like not even a once over I am SLEEPY

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

industry parties are the worst. You despise them. Its all the same every time. You would show up with Matty, have a few drinks of alcohol, and hang by Matty's side while he talked with people from the label. It got old really fast in all honesty.

Tonight you just wanted his attention more than anything, and you are determined to have it by the end of the night. You arrive to the party on his arm and the same old pattern begins as he's dragged away by Jamie to go talk to someone. Without Matty at your side, you excuse yourself to the open bar. One drink turns into two, which turns into three before you even realize it.

You planned this out beforehand. You thought to yourself, maybe if you got a bit drunk and needy, you could convince Matty to take you home early. After drink number three you walk over to Matty, and lean to whisper in his ear. "Baby, can we go home? I'm tired of this."

Matty can tell you're a bit tipsy from your mumbled speech. "Sweetheart, this stuff is important I can't just leave because you want to leave."

"But Matty-" you start, putting on pleading doe eyes. He cuts you off before you can finish your sentence.

"I said no. Now, go on, it shouldn't be too much longer, anyway. You can be patient."

So, you found yourself back at the bar, with another drink. You've had too much, but you don't really care. Too pissed at Matty to really give a shit.

After another hour passes you stumble back over to Matty. The liquid courage must be working because you don't even care about the fact he's talking to people. You nearly crash into his side when you reach him. "Matty! Can we go now?" He shoots you a glare instantly before turning back towards the two men he was speaking with.

"Sorry guys, this is my girlfriend Y/N. Please, continue on with what you were saying!" Matty's hand is around your waist in a bruising grip. His lips quickly come up to your ear to speak in a dark tone. "Behave."

You do behave... for a total of five minutes, then you get needy again. You start small, leaning into his side and placing your arm on his chest. The alcohol dulls your rational thinking enough that you have no shame in your next actions, reaching up to kiss him on the neck. Matty laughs off the kiss, not so much as turning his gaze to you, continuing to listen to the men speaking to him. His grip on your waist tightens. He's starting to get mad.

You don't stop. Your hand paws at his chest while you balance on your tip toes to whisper in his ear. "Please, sir. I need you-"

Matty steps away fast, not letting you connect your lips to his neck again. "Haha- sorry lads I think it's time I take her back home. Jamie is right over there and would be happy to answer any other questions you two might have." And with that Matty's hand firmly grips your wrist and pulls your behind him, out the door, and to his car.

Once your on the road, he finally speaks after giving you the silent treatment. "What the fuck was that? Were you trying to embarrass me? You know it's important that I talk to people like that at these things."

"I'm sorry- I just wanted your attention."

"And you thought the best way to do that was to beg me to fuck you in front of those guys?"

"I whispered it!"

"Whispered? You call that a whisper? I'm almost certain they heard you. How much have you had to drink tonight."

"Uhm... I lost count."

"No shit."

The rest of the car ride was filled with silence. When you arrive at his place, he doesn't even go around to open your car door, instead heading straight to the front door of his house. Once your both inside, he sits down on the couch. He's angry. Really fucking angry.

"Bend over my knee. Right now." You don't dare disobey him. That would only increase your punishment. You lean your body over his legs, giving him access to your ass. Matty flips up your dress to reveal your lace underwear that is already soaked through.

"I'm sorry sir- I- I promise I didn't mean to embarrass you. Just wanted you so bad." You flinch when his hand strikes your ass.

"Fucking slut. Just because you didn't mean to doesn't mean you avoid getting punished." You gasp as his hand comes down again, just as hard as the first strike. "Besides." His hand spanks you again. "You knew what you were doing when you decided to order all those drinks didn't you?" His hand hits you again, showing no mercy. "Needed some courage before you could be such a whore in public, huh?"

"Yes- yes sir- I knew what I was doing. I'm sorry." Matty's satisfied with your answer, but that doesn't stop the onslaught of his hands. You'll be bruised for at least a week. He wants you to remember this every time you sit down. He wants you to remember and learn from the punishment.

By the end of it, you're sobbing. The strikes were becoming too much, and you needed him to touch you. "Matty- p-please I- I need you, please."

"Have you learned your lesson?"

"Yes, sir. I'll never do it again. I promise." you say through choked sobs. Without warning Matty carries you to the bedroom and throws you onto the bed before he starts taking off his clothes. He's hard through his boxers, which are soaked with precum. You follow suit and take off your dress, wincing as you take the lace of your underwear off of your ass.

Matty's on top of you the next second, his cock at the entrance of where you need him most. "You know, I shouldn't even give you my cock. Only good girls deserved to get fucked."

"No! no no no! Please. I need you, I need you so bad." Tears flow down your cheeks.

Matty enters you suddenly, filling you to the hilt. He gives you no time to adjust to his size as he begins pounding into you. "Fine. I'll give you my cock." He groans out. "But I'm going at my fucking pace and you're going to take it."

His hips move rapidly, thrusting into you hard. All you can do is wrap your legs around his waist and dig your nails into his back. The moans that leave your mouth are desperate. Your cries fill the room, along with the sounds of skin meeting skin. Matty's pace is near animalistic.

Matty flips your over so you're on your stomach. You don't have the strength to hold yourself up, completely pliant on the bed. "Poor thing can't hold herself up? Thought you wanted me to fuck you?" he groans, continuing his fierce pace. The new position allows him to go even deeper into your cunt. It's all becoming too much.

"Matty-" you cry. "It's too much- I can't"

"Take it. Be my good girl and take my cock. You were fucking made for me." One of his arms wraps around your waist, pulling your up so your back is up against his chest. He uses his other hand to hold onto the headboard of the bed, steadying himself so he can thrust into you even faster.

"Matty- shit I can feel you in my stomach- fuck-" At your words, his hand shifts lower on your waist, pressing over where his cock bulges in your stomach.

"Yeah? You feel that?" He presses down harder, making a whine leave your throat. "Only I can do this to you. Your cunt is made for my cock." You moan out in agreement, drawing closer and closer to orgasm, and Matty is getting close too. "You gonna come for me? Gonna milk my cock?"

"Yes- yes sir- please."

"Go on then come for me." When he speeds up the pace of his hips, you're a goner, falling into the waves of an orgasm. The pleasure overwhelms you, pulsing through your veins. You cry out his name over and over again as he fucks you though it.

Matty is not far behind. It only takes a few more thrusts before he cums inside of you, filling you up deep inside. As soon as he's finished, he practically collapses on top of you. He takes the time to trail kisses on the back of your neck as you catch your breath and come back down to earth.

"You did good for me, baby. Did you learn your lesson?"

"Yes, sir."

"That's my girl. Let me take care of you now."

#matty healy smut #matty healy x reader #matty healy fanfic #matty healy #the 1975 fanfic #the 1975 smut #i am now going to bed i am so tired #part of me fears this is shit #thats what happens when i start writing at 12:30am #pancake anon youre next dw it should be out by sunday

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broooooo · 2 years

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(writing this first story of mine, for me specifically, to experience my own fantasy)

My name's aaron

Im in my 3rd year of highschool, I'm 19 years old, long hair, ace, nothing going for myself, not exactly bullied, not exactly popular, just Invisible most of the time, sitting alone and watching the masses, Im not a fan of school either, math can suck ass, and everything else is annoying, for years I look upon the popular seniors, all so hot, all so popular, when ever I was noticed, they would talk to me , they are so kind, the jocks in the group are nice to, although they are very horny, since I'm older, I never played sports, I was a protected child, but I always fantasize about playing football, to be a jock, iv loved the look of muscles, cleats, beer, iv jacked off to many pictures, to fuel my insecurities, maybe one day I could fit in, oh how I wish to be one of them

I said this under my breath, just so I could hear it, to calm me , I sigh and go back to listening to music to wait for my next clas

Without me knowing it, one of the jocks (Jason) ended up vaguely hearing me from close by, mostly the part about I wish I could be a jock, muscles , beer...,

He has a blank but grinning smirk, he gathers his other jock bros and rushes to coach, coach is an eccentric man, large muscles and gym lesson workouts that leave the students in pain for days.

Jason tells coach about what he heard , coach has a evil grin with his hand rubbing together,

"jason- bring him... to me"

"yes coach"

While I wait for my next class, listening to music, I see Jason and his buddies come up to me, I'm kinda shocked and happy someone acknowledged me, wonder what they want

I look up at Jason making eye contact.

"What up Aaron, my bro, coach would like to see you*

I'm visibly confused

"me? Why?"

"nothing bad, your gonna like this"

" eh, ok, what's the worst that can happen"

"ALL RIGHT LETS GOO" jason and his buddies are cheering,

In my head I think, why are they so happy xd, I wonder what could be happening, I hope Its nothing about how I skipped gym class last week,

I enter coaches office-

I say - " yes coach, you wanted to see me?"

-" yes I did, come sit over hear"

I sit across from him, taking note of the musk in the room, an intoxicating smell to say the least.

We make eye contact

"soo Aaron, I hear you want to be a jock"

Shock runs through me,

"wait what?, But how?"

"my boy Jason told me, a friend of yours I asume?"

"well I wouldn't say "friend" but we have talked in the past"

My heart's racing , breathing faster, the smell in the air ain't helping either, but I am getting hard under my trousers.

In coaches mind" don't worry my boy, Jason and the others will soon be your best BRO'S"

"now what do you say Aaron?, Want to join us?, To become a jock, I can teach you everything like your my son"

I'm a little scared, but also excited, like what the fuck is going on rn?

"umm .. y yeah , sure, I wouldn't mind coach..."

Coach smiles,

"well answered, hear, for starters, drink this son"

Son?, He hands me a can of beer,

"go on, drink, it's a staple jock drink"

Shaking, I click open the can and start of sip , gulp , and then slowly down the drink,

"how do u feal Aaron, anything different?"

"well idk, besides me being hard as a rock and sweating hard, maybe a little tipsy, I don't drink all that often_ I start to drool a little

In coaches mind he says ( well it's sure working fast I'd say, he wants this, so there's no resistance, soon he will be drinking all the time), coach smirks

"Well come with me son, leave your things, you won't be needing them, and don't worry about your next classes, iv got you covered"

I leave my jacket, and bag behind, as I get up, I feel dizzy, but a happy dizzy, Jason takes hold of me

" you good lil bro?, Don't worry, things will bet better"

lil bro ? I think, hah,sounds cool

"yeah thanks Jason, I owe you... Big bro"

Jason smiles ,

He's my big bro hehe, drool keeps coming from my lips, my head is dizzy

I'm moved into the locker room, coach orders Jason to put me down on one of the benches facing a TV, usually used to watch the game

"Jason, help Aaron undress"

"yes coach"

I become undressed, my top, my trousers, my boxers are soaked in pre ,and my hard cock is a sight to see,

Drool keeps coming

"Alright Jason, sit next to him, while I set this up"

Jason and his bros sit next to me ..

A video starts to play, Jason holding me up, as I stare at the screan.

Jason Whispers into my ear" don't worry lil bro, master coach and I hear for you" with a big dumb smile,

I continue to drool in a dazed state, my cock rock hard and leaking a fountain of pre

I stare at the video

Coach comes out of the back with a football kit, cleats, jock strap, pads, and a helmet,

"now stare Aaron, stare, become who you wish to be me, who's your meant to be,

A dumb jock"

I , Jason and the bros start to laugh, as we all stare at the screen, we are all hard, but I'm the most affected, seems they have been through this already,

"what do u wish you Aaron?"

Slobly I say

"dumb... Jock.... To becum...beer..... Bros.... Muscles ...... Football..... Wish.... I am dum , I obsy, I .... I must obey, .... I jock bro.... Bro.... Cum."

Coach grins- "good boy, now who do you obey?"

"i..,..I obay....yoouoou.... ... Master coach"

"and what are you?"

"a... Dumbbro... Jock..."

"good boy my son, we are almost done here, stand up boy, don't look away from the screen

I sand up, my bro Jason holding me steady

Coach then dresses me up in the kit, all soaked in something that soon my skin soaks up

It's all too big for me, but then,

My muscles are , my body, they are growing, my stomach hardens into 6 pack abs, my triceps and bi ceps , my arms are inflating and hardening with pure muscle, my hands beef up with hardened fingers from years in the gym and the field, my neck thickens and chest widens with huge hard nipples, my legs thicken and elongate , tree trunk muscle legs form, my feet expand, grow , while my hardened dick, grows longer, harder, leaking even more, a 12 inch monster , my body start to stink,

The kit starts to fit against me, tight, the cleats feel snug and the gloves give energy, my body fully soaked the liquid from before , coach stands back holding the helmet

"good boy Aaron, now recite the screens words, submit to me, to your new life

My thoughts are changing, my memory fading, changing, I recite the screens words..

"I am a jock,

I am a jock, I am a jock

I am a bro, a jock, a dumb

A dumb jock bro, football

I must obey coach, I am a jock, football jock , I m obedient, I am dumb , I am a bro , I am A dumb

Football jock...."

"who do you obey"

"I obey you coach"

With that, coach places the helmet on my head

My mind stops, I go blank, my memories reshape,

I am a dumb jock, I am a bro, quarterback of the team, Jason and the other bros have been my bros for years, we love sucking each others dicks, no homo bro, only us men know how to to work a dick, better than any chick,, Jason is my big bro, we workout, we get drunk together,, we obey

We obey master coach

Coach then pays attention to my hard leaking jock, were all my old memories are in the lemon sizes ball churning with new jock cum

"sit down boy" I sit down to coaches orders, Jason and others relax against me, we are all about to burst

Coach starts to jack me off, I start to grunt in a deep voice.

"good... Good boy Aaron , good jock boy , relax, let it sink in, you are dumb jock my son, your dreams have been fulfilled, who do you thank?"

" I thank you coach"

" good boy... Now CUM"

We all moan and grunt as cum, CUM , rods of cum shoot out all over us, puddles of cum stain our Kits, the walls, the bench, some got on to coach , he licks it off of him.

Coach lets go of my cum covered dick, and pushes it back into the cup jock strap, then tightens the tight football leggings to complete it

My huge muscled body sits,against the wall,

"stand up Aaron my son"

My head starts to clear, thinking only of beer, cock, coach football, the bros, football.... . muscles. Working out... Beer..

Me , Jason and my bros stand up

"yes coach? My dick still hard , ready for more , very horny

" we are gonna do some training for the game, Jason and the others , go, your bro Aaron needs his picture taken for the year book.

"Yes coach!, Hehe, welcome to the team lil bro, we'll be waiting outside , Jason bro bumps my back,

_" see you there big bro"

"stand over hear Aaron my son"

"yes coach"

Click, the pictures are taken

As the flashing light fades, my dick explodes once again, cum pooling in the jock cup,

I am a dum football jock.

" run off to practice boy, ill meet the team there,

"YES COACH"

I run to the field, my loud steps echoing

Coach takes one last pic of me on the field, to commemorate this special day,

"soon he will be bringing others to me.

So happy to make Aaron's dreams come true"

Coach runs to the field, proud , ready to get us to the championship games

" ALRIGHT BOYS, 6 laps, GO, there's beers waiting for ya"

____________________________

The end, ahhhh , the dream... Atleast I made it come true in writing xd

If anyone sees this, what do you think?

I sure enjoyed my first story

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river13245 · 7 months

Text

The Last time (Tony Stark x Reader)

Angst, no happy ending

Warning: Alcohol and Tony being an ass kinda

This was not part of the plan, nor the agenda for the night. You hadnt planned on going out and getting drunk. However when Thor and Natasha both came up to you telling you that you should go with them to the bar, you couldn't just say no.

What you didn't expect was Natasha to participate in a drinking game with Thor. The both of them had a much higher tolerance than you, since Natasha drinks more than you do. Then with Thor being an actual god his tolerance is so high that you think he will drink up the whole supply. But when they started asking you to join the game and taunting who were you to say no. If you were anything...its competitive.

Thor and Natasha both had a higher tolerance than you since you didn't drink much. It also doesn't help that Thor was a literal god and Natasha drank at every party Tony threw..which was quite often.

So after an hour or two you were drunk while they were only tipsy.

Even in your drunk state you knew this was a bad idea but before you could stop what you were doing you had knocked on Tony's front door. Tony and you had an off and on relationship. The problem was he couldn't ever just commit to you.

Before you could turn to leave, the door opened and their stood tony wiping off his hands with a wrag and wearing his sweatpants and a tank top. He then looks at you "y/n"

"Tony" you said softly, Your eyes were red and wer leaning against the doorframe. "are you drunk" he asks and you shake your head but instantly regret it

He sighs "I thought we both said that we wouldnt see each other anymore." You steady yourself against the door and cross your arms glaring at him. "Yes I know that you said that..i just..I know this is a bad idea but can you please just hold me for a minute."

He nods and wraps his arms around your waist pulling you close to him. Your face rests against his neck and arms wrap around his torso. This is all you have ever wanted, all you have ever wanted was him.

You were getting lost into the moment that when he pulled away you had to force yourself not to frown. He pulls his phone out "im calling you a cab so you get home safe" you nod

Once you got home you climbed into bed and thought about all the times you would go back to each other. You always knew it would end the same way but it was like routine. It wasn't ideal but you get used to it after a while

-----

A month or so goes by and you had promised yourself you wouldn't go back to Tony. You had been able to keep things professional between the both of you. Everything seemed to be going fine until one night you heard a knock on your door.

You were in your pajamas watching a Disney movie when you heard the knock. The only people who ever came to your place was Natasha or Thor so when you opened the door you didn't expect to see Tony.

Especially the state he was in. Tony looked as if he had been crying, his hair was a mess and you could smell the alcohol he had been drinking. "Tony" you said in a soft voice not wanting to speak to loudly.

He placed his hands on your upper arms and looks at you "y/n I am so sorry for the way our relationship is. You mean the world to me and I don't know why I cant change for you. But I want to, I really do."

As he speaks you smell the alcohol and you know this isn't really him talking. This is how it always goes, you let him into your heart over and over again just to watch him go again. It never gets easier. He never sees the way you ache for him to love you for longer than a few days before he leaves again.

Placing my hands on the sides of your face I kiss your cheek and I repeat the words I always tell him. "its always been you Tony, I wish you would see that"

He looks at me and nods but I say something else. Something new that I haven't said before. "this is the last time I let you through my door" He kisses my lips before pulling away "this is the last time, I wont hurt you anymore."

You knew how this was going to end. But you figured why not one more time. A little love now is better than none at all right?

-----

How wrong you were, you had told yourself you wouldn't let it hurt you. Not anymore but when you woke one morning to find Tony packing his bag and grabbing his keys it still hurt just like all those times before. "Tony"

He freezes before turning to look at you. "y/n". Looking at him as tears fill your eyes you nod "There's someone else isn't there?" Tony refuses to look at you for a moment and that's all the confirmation you needed.

"I'm tired of asking to be the one you want. When time and time again you leave and break my heart in a blink of an eye" The hurt in your voice is very noticeable and he walks closer to you and says "I wont hurt you anymore" before placing a kiss to your cheek and walks out of the house. Leaving you behind for the last time.

#tony stark x reader #tony stark x gn reader #tony stark x male reader #the last time taylor swift #river13245 #tony stark fanfiction #the avengers fanfic #angst #angst with no comfort #angst with no happy ending

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hyunjinspark · 9 months

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Hi! I wasn't expecting the new chapter to come up so fast I was screaming when I saw it. This is the second time I'm writing to you and this time I'm kinda drunk I wouldn't expect you to remember me but I'm the anon who was going through some stuff and made streusels lol maybe at this point I should pick an emoji (don't even know which ones are available tho) and write to you more. I just wanted to say even if it may seem dumb to some people which I would understand, your story is one of the things that keep me going even if I get angry at both y/n and Hyunjin. But everytime I go like "yeah i need to see the end of this story so keep hanging on sis". So I have to thank you for writing. While reading the last chapter I thought something was gonna happen with y/n and Yeonjun (i read them warnings and I was like damn) and I screamed and had to take a break lol. Tbh I would love to see that mess since everything is going crazy. I hope you keep writing forever but at the same time I hope you feel no pressure (girl what am I even saying) I can imagine how people who write can feel stuck sometimes because I try to write shitty poetry and stuff to feel a little better sometimes. It's not even close to what you're doing but maybe the feeling is similar. I have to tell you that I've been here since last summer and I've been better since then but still there are days that feels like hell and I'm sure there are people who are like me. I feel like I'm rambling rn but really thank you for letting me get out of my world time to time. I don't know if you ever imagined that your writing could help some people to this extent but your story is probably like in top 3 things I look forward to in my life and I DON'T CARE IF IT'S SAD imma be here till the end. Sending you lots of love THANK YOU ❤️

oh my god. of course i remember you !! you made streusels cause of the story 😭 i was wondering how you were and im so happy you reached out to me. im tipsy too right now so this is perfect dw about it and you make complete sense 😭

and no its not dumb at all !! im soo happy this story makes you happy. yn and yeonjun man i cant tell you how many times ive considered it and thought about it 😭 it would be perfect but hellish at the same time.

i do get stuck a lot and sometimes when im inspired i have no time so its frustrating but these messages motivate me and make me so happyyy. thank you for reading. thank you for still being here ! im so proud of you and i hope to hear from you soon again.

#star lost with you

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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youtube

Watch the 2024 American Climate Leadership Awards for High School Students now: https://youtu.be/5C-bb9PoRLc

The recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by student climate leaders! Join Aishah-Nyeta Brown & Jerome Foster II and be inspired by student climate leaders as we recognize the High School Student finalists. Watch now to find out which student received the $25,000 grand prize and top recognition!

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hyukmoon · 3 years

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moon. | l.sy x gn!reader

lee sangyeon x gn!reader

word count: about 4.01k

to put it short: congrats! Something you should actually say, right? Your best friend and crush is getting married in two days and you feel,... well, not very good about it. So, wait... he's returning the feelings? Damn.

content warning: ANGST in capital letters, I would add lots of exclamation points but im lazy. So yeah, hella angsty. Some good old making out, it's kind of heavy at some point but no smut at this point lol. I don't condone any of the done actions, so yeah, I would've personally handled everything differently, but you know, y/n is kinda wild. Very awkward sometimes, but that's more the situation in itself. ALSO, NOT PROOFREAD

taglist: @loki-in-hogwarts

note: the second thing i wrote and im somewhat excited!!! Yes! Exclamation points. So,... thanks for reading :)

It was a great day. Well, at least seemingly for everyone but you. Your best friend in this world Sangyeon was about to get married to the love of his life, who is notyou and now you just stand in the hotel lobby waiting for it to happen. Funnily enough, the crushing feeling of desperation and fear didn’t seem to set in yet.

The hotel lobby was filled to the brim with acquaintances and other guests possibly confused by the uproar of the wedding guests. So, who were you specifically waiting for? The rest of your friend group, the ones who will most likely clean up after the wedding whatever will be left of you.

A nervous smile swept up to your lips, casually just avoiding every sort of tension that could come across you. Just with the luck of this entire occurrence an older woman started to approach you, demon alike features spreading around her face almost like she knew you were apparently the only single person here. An aunty, that wasn’t even related to you but had all the business to judge.

“Are you here for the bride or the groom?”, her sweet voice rang a familiar feeling in your stomach. Almost too sweet, making you suspicious of her intent. “I’m here for my best friend, Sangyeon. So, yeah, for the groom.”, you hesitated a second, “What about you though? Do you know the bride?”

“She’s my youngest niece, the only one that still visits, her sisters don’t even care anymore…” You nodded politely, not wanting to anger her now and stepped towards a different direction.

“So, my dear, are you here with anybody?” You already feared that question, the same as always. The eyes of yours started with a panicked expression searching through the room a familiar pair. “No, I am here on my own. I kinda wanted to focus on getting Sangyeon through with it, being there for him.” As a friend.

Possibly this was the first part of feeling despair and fear. People at this wedding were really waiting for them to get married. They weren’t joking, this would change everything.

“Ah, I see. You know, get over him. Well, it is time for you at least, you’re not getting younger. There are quite few handsome men here. I remember the names Juyeon and ah yes! Kevin, get over here!” As far as you were concerned, your facial expression couldn’t possibly look more stunned than a moment ago, yet another one of your good friends appeared, seemingly just as confused.

This only held on for a good second, Kevin knew exactly what to do. “Oh hi, I’m so sorry to steal [Y/N] away from you, but I actually need to talk to them on my own over a gift we both prepared for the couple!”, he grinned at the lady, who was obviously smitten with him. “Yes, of course, hun. Take your time.” She finally hushed into a separate direction.

“So, how are we doing? You seem kinda… stressed.”

“You don’t say”, you sighed, “if I have to go through a conversation like this again today, believe me I’ll-. “

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I get the sentiment. Even though I meant more the other situation. Like in, Sangyeon getting married and you sitting here all grumpy because of it.”, Kevin was already aware of your “small” infatuation with your best friend, a man too far out of your reach also funnily enough, the man’s wedding you’re attending. However, your friend in front of you didn’t seem to mind talking about it out loud in a place like the hotel lobby. Your lips tightened up into a fine line.

“I’m not grumpy! I just…I don’t really know what to do. I mean, I know I’m going to be there for him but yeah, okay, I might feel a bit grumpy.” The lobby did clear up a lot now.

“Okay, oof. There’s this dinner with everyone in the evening today, do you think you can get through that?”, Kevin asked hesitantly just as stressed with this additional complication.

“I mean, I probably have to, don’t I? This makes me so sick, ugh. Not gonna lie, my stomach feels like a laundry machine.” You laughed quietly and drifted off again into a place where you didn’t need to think about this.

“What did you really expect though? You know I love you, respectfully, but like, this feels like an incredibly bad move to do.”

“Don’t you think it would be worse if I didn’t show up at all? I’ll just need to go through this weekend and I’m outta here. No one will know anything.” It might feel like a nightmare but at least a nightmare you can actually run away from and not actually have to face at some point.

“Well, I hope you’ll keep your confidence. Because imagine I saw the person, I love getting married to someone else. Oh my, believe me, you wouldn’t find me for the next three weeks.”

“Not very helpful, a good three out of ten. I guess, I’ll just stick to sulking around then.” A dead smile crept up your lips following a stern look from your side at your opposite.

“Seems like a good plan, just stick to me, maybe we will find someone to take your attention away from this, huh?” A sly grin was visible on Kev’s face.

“Ughhh, of course. Let’s do this. It can’t get much worse than that”, you cleared your throat, “thanks, though. You actually make this here somewhat bearable.”

“Awww, come on. We should pack out our suitcases.”

No one can really prepare someone for a moment like this. Most older folk turned into their hotel rooms which left you in a party like situation seeing your closest friends turning it up in a huge pavilion while the future groom sits comfortably on a velvety sofa hand in hand with his fiancée.

The air was quite warm even at this time of the evening, not humid, just warm enough for everyone to taste the end of this era with nostalgia and a slight feeling of energy to experience what’s to come afterwards.

You as well sat down, continuously processing your environment. With a cup of your favorite drink, you felt invincible, nothing able to shake you down.

Now while this wasn’t a preferred environment, this was manageable; you could look your best friend into his eyes and proudly congratulate him on his wedding. You would be able to get over this and continue to be a great friend. Black hair with an intense facial expression made its way into your viewpoint along with a somewhat tipsy Kevin. Simultaneously the lighter hair of your best friend fought his way through the crowd.

Lee Sangyeon, the man lighting up your mood with simple touch of his fingertips was now signalizing for you to head outside towards the veranda of the pavilion. He exuded patience, yet clearly waiting for a response of you. You nodded and brushed cautiously over your evening attire.

“Hii, [Y/N]! Can I introduce this someone to you? This is Juyeon, he might look a bit intense, but he’s really nice to talk to! So, I’m gone for a sec then!” Kevin started drifting off into a different direction where you stopped him in his tracks.

“Could this wait? Sangyeon needs to talk to me. I think it’s important, I’ll come back though in a bit!” You gifted both of them an apologetic face and made your way around the men towards the going to be groom.

Surely it wasn’t exactly clear why he wanted to speak to you, especially on his own. He was still waiting for you after all.

“[Y/N]! What has it been? Like three? Four months? I missed you so much.”, Sangyeon pulled you into his chest abruptly and sighed softly into your shoulder. Engulfed entirely in his figure you never wanted to wake up from this again. Was it now 10 seconds? 15 seconds? Neither he nor you really seemed to let go, taking in all the scents of his that were formerly familiar to you.

“Yeah, I think so. You were probably busy planning this all and I just had to work, I guess.” Trying to keep it short was your main goal, appearing distant maybe. He didn’t mind at all though. Not discouraged from continuing this conversation Sangyeon pointed at the veranda, showing the only speck of space with little to no crowd.

The veranda was close to closed off to the party. Non distinguishable palm trees in the far distance were playing right into your cards for not having to look into his eyes. Magnetically glowing, that’s how he appeared. All happy and smiley about the obvious luck he was experiencing. Now again, he sat down with you in the beach chairs without loosing a word.

“The palm trees are so pretty. You remember me wanting to buy some new plants?”, you tried to invite him to the conversation.

“You always want to buy new plants, which time do you mean?” Sangyeon grinned to himself. “You know what? It’s so weird. Everything feels still so unreal. This wedding, also you at my wedding… So weird.”

“I am literally your best friend, where else should I be? Your funeral? At home? Who else is going to charm the hotel staff for some free capri suns and new towels?” Your mouth crinkled up and you let out a soft laugh.

“[Y/N] … You know exactly what I mean!”

“Noo, not at all. I’m so confused right now, not gonna lie.” Your face finally moved towards his direction, seeing his gentle gaze resting on you.

“Do you remember when we were still in school, and we promised each other we would marry each other if we didn’t find anybody else?” His gaze got more intense with each sentence.

“Yeahh, kind of. I was probably tired and it’s like ten years ago. I’m not really sure what you’re trying to tell me.”

“I really thought I was going to marry you. For several years, actually.”, he laughed. “I had such a crush on you and then you met your s/o and all that. Ughh, it seemed so complicated back then. Kind of weird to think about what could have happened if I did ask you out or something.”

“True.”, you turned away again standing up and resting against the wooden railing of the pavilion. “But you didn’t so, let’s just drop it there.” The weather as well started rebelling a bit, the wind hugging your figure slightly too tight for your taste.

“Why are you so cold all of a sudden?”, he whispered closely behind you.

“Well, you’re getting married tomorrow. And you’re telling me about a crush you had on me?”, you croaked.

“I was just being nostalgic, I thought this would be fine with you.” Sangyeon appeared now next to you on the railing, waiting for you to face his concerned dark eyes.

“It isn’t for me. It just feels wrong.”

“What feels so wrong about it? It was a long time ago.”

It is here, the bitterness. Bitterness shouldn’t even be the correct term, the pain of your heart going into a slump didn’t feel like a fitting word. Being reminded again that you will never have a chance again.

“Wait or is it not a long time ago for you?”, The voice of his tried to word his next sentence very carefully.

“I went out with them because I thought you were joking. Then when I thought about you, it was always different. It was too late though, you met her.” Only the close ocean along with the wind were hearable, neither you nor he were able to form another thought put into a sentence.

“You could’ve told me. I would’ve-.”

“Broken up with her?”

“No, I-.”

“Then what could you have done?”, you interrupted Sangyeon’s rambling, trembling while speaking. Terribly spiteful with a bite that wasn’t too often dripping down your lips.

“This.” Sangyeon pressed a fluttery kiss against your lips. Slender fingers tapped onto the skin right under your chin, signalizing you to look at him.

The now much calmer atmosphere made you snake your arms around his torso. Heat rose towards your head, longing after a second out in the cold again just to see his lovely facial expression. Your lips broke off and touched once more in an almost hypnotic fashion.

His hot breath started sliding downwards your cheek to your neck, physically making you unable to resist his entrancing presence. Also his hands broached over from your face down to your waist, holding you with the lightest touch.

Sangyeon’s lips darted away from yours, catching you staring deeply into his eyes. The silence felt warm now as well, filled with the slow and recovering breath of the participants.

“[Y/N], I think I still feel that way.”, a rosy blush swept over the man’s face you wanted to hear say these things so many times and so long ago.

“No. No. No. You shouldn’t! I shouldn’t either! I have to go.” The reality of the situation caught up to you. This was bad. Incredibly bad. Still the disgusting feeling of hope within this made its way up to your head. Stinging alongside the feeling of remorse, you didn’t think clearly, especially now, next to him.

You darted in the fastest way possible from the pavilion up to the hotel to your room, leaving him there.

Today should be the final day. The hopes that already should have been buried a long time ago, crawled up again and clawed its way into your mind. What if he leaves her for you today? Like in those unrealistic rom coms. Yes, again, it was unrealistic.

Leaving her at the altar and running after you. While all those thoughts of hope and wishes came together you found yourself with a stomachache. His fiancée was an incredibly nice person, sweet and kind along with being a beauty. You shouldn’t even dare to think about Sangyeon that way anymore, she deserved a lot more. Quite honestly, you felt pathetic. Who were you to run into their possible future?

Just because of a simple brush over the lips, his eyes staring into yours like no one else existed but you and his soft hands delicately touching your waist. A tap on your shoulder put you out of your trance, “[Y/N]? Can you go up to Sangyeon’s room? He asked for you.” Kevin’s eyes glanced at you with uncertainty. Neither you nor he knew why he wanted to see you.

Even more importantly, why did he need to see you alone? This seemed like dangerous territory after, basically yesterday. Agony rose again, what if he really was going to leave her?

“Sure, I don’t know why he wants to see me again though.”, you said and left to see the groom’s room. You stumbled more and more over every step closer to the door of the man who’s going to rip your heart and air out of your lungs. The normally soft laid out carpet felt in this moment like you were stepping barefoot over glass. There was the door, brightly painted in eggshell paired with the digits of the hotel room.

Before you could reach the door to knock on it, light brown waves greeted your overtly surprised face.

“You clean up well.”, Sangyeon’s rang in your ears clearer than freshly hung-up laundry in your nose. His previously concerned face curled up into a faint smile.

“Same goes for you”, you tried your best to hide the very apparent frog in your throat, “So, why do you need me?”

“Just needed to see you before going out there, I guess.”, his voice got a lot quieter. It got silent.

Not sure if a said word was necessary, you plopped down on a small, velvety stool. Every whisper was to be heard. An otherness surrounded Sangyeon, like he wasn’t there anymore, and his thoughts took over his being. You scooted closer towards him, just wanting to see him up close for the last time like this, smelling his earthy cologne from this distance.

“Why are you doing this to me?”, your voice went close to hoarse after the question. He was just as silent as before. No sound, nothing. This torment of a weekend was supposed to end with no gratification, not feeling free from this feeling on your chest? Your hand slid over his, the most desperate attempt to get his attention while also experiencing his touch again. Sangyeon jerked his hand back and returned to his absent posture.

“Why do you want to hurt me like this? I am your best friend, and you use me like I’m nothing.” The lack of power you had now made you sink down to the beige teddy carpet. Small tears started swelling up in your nearly dry eyes, kind of contradictory, yet the more tear drops rolled down your cheeks the rottener and hollow you felt.

“You were my best friend until you-.”, he stopped midsentence, “made me feel things again I didn’t need, I didn’t want.” Also his face was wet, ridden with tears making his usually calm and cheerful persona look like a painful insult.

“You asked me here. It hurts, Sangyeon. I can’t make it stop hurting, I don’t know what to do”, you reached for him again, “Could I ever be enough for you?” He returned your former attempts to stroke your face. Cornering both of you, the air trapped you in the toxins of heartbreak and hopelessness.

Once again, Sangyeon’s hand glid over your soft skin and halted on your face. Glaringly staring into each other’s eyes, you were there again. The day before, yesterday. Close to baring the soul of each person present.

“[Y/N], it’s not about being enough. It never has been. I have made a commitment I already broke, I…I can’t do this”, he sighed, “you know I love her.”

“I thought you loved me as well.” Overwhelming nothingness overruled you, almost scaring you about this reaction. You weren’t crying, yelling nor having any physical reaction at all. It was convincingly numb; the resting hurt would come later. Sangyeon’s head dropped in the dip of your shoulder and neck.

This sort of closeness would never happen again. You feeling him breathing into you while having his comforting heartbeat close to yours.

“I do, but I can’t do this to her. I would never do this to her.”, he whispered into your shoulder. A sigh came from his side.

“Then, please. Kiss me, for the last time.” The last part of the sentence left a disgustingly bitter taste in your mouth. This was over, right? His head, which was formerly resting on your shoulder, drifted up and towards yours. Also his expression blank and hollow, like he didn’t know anything.

For the last time, his hands cupped your face in a comfortable manner. As always, he felt homely, but he surely wasn’t yours ever. Not even waiting a good second or two, the light brunette’s face came closer to yours. With no hesitation both of your lips touched tenderly, releasing every sort of affection that could be expressed at that second. You inhaled again his intoxicating scent, in the hopes of having him all over you. His now reddened lips moved closer towards your jawline making you gasp for air.

Also, you weren’t completely still, constantly shifting your hands up and down over his torso upwards his neck, desperately feeling everything, you can for the last time. Sangyeon’s locks tickled you softly while he suddenly latched his mouth onto your neck right below your ear.

“No. Please, I just want a kiss on my lips.”, you said lowly, closely resembling a whine afterwards. He complied pretty quickly, leaving you with no thought but him tickling your bottom lip with his warm tongue. With him being this fast, you didn’t want to keep him on his toes. Entirely engaged in this moment, hands surprised you again on your waist, wandering closer and closer under the blouse you were wearing. You moaned into the kiss, making him take the opportunity to maneuver his tongue into your mouth.

Similarly to you, he was also stunned for a short moment when you grabbed up onto some strands of hair. A sigh left his now plump lips, a need of fresh air arrived onto both of you. Yet this was short lived, his hands captured your chin and attached his lips again onto yours in a matter of mere seconds. A bell rang, close footsteps to be heard across the floor reminding you of the situation you were in.

“Why am doing this? I am so sorry.”, you broke off his lips and took a step backwards at the door.

“[Y/N], we both did this, and it won’t happen again. We just need some time without each other. I think it would be for the best if we don’t spend time together alone anymore.”

“Are you doing what I think you’re doing? I don’t know what to say. I-.”, His lips captured yours again fast with a lot more force behind his kiss.

A strong arm shut the about to be opened door again and hovered over your head. The other one caught grabbed your chin with an almost contradictory feeling to it, the lightest touch just to shove you into his direction. You sighed into his lips, waiting for him to commit with his tongue one more time. Buttery lips pressed against yours and clang inside your mouth. Fiercely did your tongues meet, ending with him sucking on yours. Wet cheeks batting against each other with no intent of separating, your movement still came to a halt.

“You know what? I hate this. I want you to be happy, then if it is with her, I will just y’know…go or uhm mind my business.”, you slurred the last part. It wasn’t really one of your most prideful moments. Still flushed with tears and embarrassment you dropped again against the room door.

“I ask for one condition though,” incredibly hearse was your voice after the crying and even more so because of your follow up, “I do not not want to see you for some time, I don’t want to have to see your face ever again.” Tears weren’t anymore swelling up in your eyes, they never seemed to stop running down with no chance of leaving this conversation with an ounce of self-respect and pride.

It wasn’t even really much of a problem to leave him behind for a bit, it most likely would be for the best anyway, yet while his words should only leave a small mark and feel like a ripped off band aid, you felt alone. A sense of loneliness crept stealthily into you leaving you with nothing but a severe feeling of dread.

“If that is what you want, I’ll respect that.” The room got quieter till you heard the last of his words: “Of course, I still want you in on my wedding though, you’re still my best friend.” Sangyeon’s usual soft and kind smile appeared on his face, seemingly reaching you an olive branch. The former assertiveness and confidence drained through the conversation; you were nothing but a wreck.

“Alright, I’ll be there.”

The ceremony was beautiful. Fairy like flowers were hung all across the beach space, making the place more surreal than it was to begin with. Everything light with a hint of light green and an even lighter lavender tone. The air seemed to have evaporated all the tension and sadness from your face. All across the seats were relatives and friends sitting with a nervously happy face. Ironically, he really thought it was going to be you someday.

“You’re [Y/N], right? Everyone always tried to introduce me to you. Now we’re sitting next to each other at Sangyeon’s wedding together! I’m Juyeon by the way.”

#lee sangyeon x reader #sangyeon x reader #lee sangyeon #sangyeon #tbz #tbz fic #tbz angst #the boyz fic #the boyz #the boyz au #the boyz scenarios #sangyeon x you #sangyeon x y/n #the boyz x reader #sangyeon tbz #the boyz kevin #the boyz juyeon #moon kevin #lee juyeon

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reidsconverse · 3 years

Text

memories • spencer reid

Spencer Reid x Reader

Warnings: none! just 4000 words of pure angst

This was an old fic reworked to be about around spencer so its taking a lottt of creative/artistic liberty with the character, so it kinda sucks im sorry! 😁

Every moment you had with him was one to be remembered and cherished for better or worse.

It had been a few weeks since Spencer had officially ended things, he had moved all of his stuff out of your apartment and now it seemed as if he had never even existed in the same place as you, as though you two were strangers. That is had it not been for the images of memories the two of you held. So, here you were sat alone in your room, your only company the half-empty bottle of wine and photographs of the two of you which sat strewn carelessly across your floor.

You picked up a picture and stared at it realising you both looked so happy. His arm was wrapped around your shoulder, a cup in his hand and his signature grin sitting across his face. Your head was leaning against his shoulder, the smile on your face reminding you of how free you had felt that night, you had never felt happier and you recognised that night as the night you realised...you were so in love.

"We should have a party," Spencer yelled despite there being no one else other than the two of you in the room.

"Right now?" You looked at him as if he was insane, not only was it completely out of character for your boyfriend but also, it was 1 am on a Wednesday and although your friends weren't those with a regular schedule you presumed most of them would decline a house party in the middle of the week.

"Yeah right now, c'mon doll I'll call Derek and some of the others and you call your friends." His hand was already on his phone texting Derek before you could protest so you followed his instructions and went ahead and invited your friends before getting up and preparing for this impromptu party.

It had only been 10 minutes when you heard Derek and some others open the door shouting for Spencer and you walked over with a grin on your face, "Hey D, Spencers being a diva and redoing his hair, he'll be right down." You said, rolling your eyes as Derek pulled you into a hug, he may have been Spencer's best friend but he thought of you as a sister and always treated you as such.

"Well I have look good for my girl," You heard Spencer say from behind you quickly placing a kiss on your cheek before doing his weird handshake with Derek, "Hey, thanks for coming'."

The three of you made your way to the kitchen to grab some drinks and greet some more guests who had congregated in that area and before you knew it, you were 4 shots in, feeling way past tipsy and in the mood to dance.

"Hey Spence," You said walking over to where he was now sat, a cup in his hand as he held a conversation with JJ and Emily about something that you didn't care too much about. You waved a quick hello to the girls so as not to be rude and then placed your head on his shoulder to let him know of your presence.

"Hey darling, you feeling good?" He turned his face and flashed you a wide grin before wrapping an arm around you to pull you close to him. He enjoyed being near you whenever he could, when he was away he would long for the days where all he did was sit and hold you close to him regardless of what the two of you were doing, so now whenever he had the chance he would hold you close.

"Feelin' great Spence.. wanna dance with you..." You said pulling out of his hold and grabbing his hand leading him onto the 'dance floor', which was just the open space in your living room. He laughed and quickly finished his drink, discarding the cup somewhere in the room and held you as you both danced to the music playing through the speakers.

After a couple of songs, you both made your way to get another drink and get a break from the crowd, you sat at the kitchen island and passed him a drink."You know, considering you're a genius, I would've thought you'd be able to coordinate a bit better." You said teasing him about his choice of moves which had essentially been him waving his arms in the air attempting to be in tune with the music.

He looked at you in fake shock and scoffed, "Yeah well it was still better than whatever you were trying to do." Referring to your horrendous attempt at trying to be sexy which in truth was never going to be anything but embarrassing. You stuck your tongue out in a childish manner causing him to laugh and quickly move to place his lips against yours giving you a soft kiss.

You jumped down from the counter after pulling back as a couple of your friends walked in and struck up a conversation about nothing interesting yet you made the effort to look engaged as Spencers's arm slipped over your shoulders and you placed your head against his shoulder.

"Hey guys, look here." You both turned to see your friend Harry, as always with a polaroid camera in his hand. You and Spencer gave each other a quick smile before grinning wide for the camera, both your faces full of love and happiness.

You sat there thinking about how quickly things can change, the people in the image you held so young and naive to the struggles the future would hold. Taking another sip of your wine you skimmed through some more pictures before stopping at one that held a bittersweet meaning. A picture that was taken a few days after what had been your worst fight, you both looked happy but all you could think about the events leading up to the image being taken.

It was your and Spencers 5th anniversary and he had promised he would make it to dinner. You hadn't seen each other in weeks because he was away on a case but he had promised he wouldn't miss this day, he had asked for permission from Hotch to leave for a couple of days so he would be there. "No excuses, No ifs and buts...I'll be there babe. I promise."

But there you were, alone at a table for two. The look on the waiters face held nothing but pity as he walked over for the fourth time to ask if someone would be joining you. Finally, you gave up and shook your head to let him know you would be leaving and would like the cheque. You had never felt so humiliated walking out of the restaurant head held high but tears building up in your eyes and so you cried. You felt so broken, almost as broken as all those promises Spencer had made you. The word promise and sorry had lost all meaning in the last 5 years, simply a courtesy rather than meaningful.

The minute you got home your phone began ringing, it was Spencer.

"Hey doll, I'm so sorry I couldn't make it, the team wanted to go out last night and I kind of missed my -." He began to explain causing you to scoff, 'no ifs or buts' my ass.

"How could you?" Your voice cracking as you tried to hold back the tears that were threatening to spill for the second time that night. "I waited for 2 fucking hours Spencer, I felt like a fucking idiot."

"What? What are you talking about?" His voice was full of confusion. "Didn't you get my text?"

"No, I fucking didn't. I didn't get a fucking text. But that's not the fucking point, You should've been here, you promised you would be here."

"Babe, I'm so -," He began but you knew what he was gonna say. The only conversations you seemed to have were stuck on a loop like a broken record.

"Save it. Don't say you're sorry when you don't mean it, stop saying sorry and show it instead."

"Look, I'll get on the first flight out. I'll see you in a few hours, I'll make it up to you I prom-." You hung up the phone before he could continue, his promise worth nothing to you anymore. Walking over to the couch, you fell asleep the minute your head rested against one of the many cushions populating the seat.

You woke up to keys jingling in the door, yet you made no effort to move from where you were. The sound of his footsteps got louder as he approached.

"Babe? I know you're up." He said, kneeling beside you making you sigh and sit up. "Babe, I'm so sorry. I fucked up."

You just stared at him, it might have been petty but you didn't want to give in to his apologies just yet, he had to understand just how much he had hurt you first.

"I couldn't care less anymore, Spencer. I just need to remember that I'll always come second to work and that's fine, it's important to you and I understand that." You got up and walked over to the kitchen to gather yourself.

"Babe you are the most important thing to me, I'm sorry-."

That was the straw that broke the camel's back. "Here we go again, Spencer there's only so many times you can say you're sorry before it loses all meaning. I'm sick and tired of this, I don't know if I can do this anymore. You're never here, you make promises you can never keep and I'm pretty sure you've told me you're sorry more times than you've told me you love me."

"Please don't do this. I love you." His voice was shaking, breaking down at the thought of you leaving him. He moved over to you and turned you so you were facing him. "I know this means nothing to you but I am so sorry. I've been so shitty to you and I know it."

"Spencer, I deserve better than this and I'm sick of forgiving you and acting like I'm fine with how you treat me, you might not mean it but it fucking hurts. I love you so much and I know you love me but would it kill you to put me first for once in your fucking life."

This annoyed him, the lack of sleep and being overworked leaving him less patient and more irritable, "That's not fucking fair, you knew what you were signing up for when you started dating me, I'm doing my fucking best. I go to work for US, to support US. If I could devote all of my time to you if I could, but I can't and it fucking kills me. You can't understand how much I miss you when I'm not here."

Tears welled in your eyes seeing him breakdown, unable to keep up the unbothered facade you had on, "I just...Spence, I miss you too. It hurts not being able to be near you and so when you're not there when you promise you will be, it hurts it really fucking hurts not to mention it's terrifying, how am I supposed to know you're ok if you do shit like that."

He pulled you into his arms as you sobbed into his chest, all the emotions you'd kept bottled up during the argument letting go. "I know baby, I'm so sorry I hurt you. I promise, and I mean it this time, I won't let you down again. I love you." He mumbled into your hair, slowly kissing your forehead whilst consoling you and holding you like he never wanted to let go.

The two of you went to bed that night in silence, not a word was spoken until the next day wherein Spencer switched off his phone and dedicated the whole weekend to you and only you. He kept his word once he had to leave, always fulfiling his promises, never pushing you to the side and communicating with you always. The two of you felt strong again, you were happy.

You put your glass down and walked out of your room and began pacing around the living room, pictures of you and him still up on your walls, the walls that no longer belonged to the both of you. You thought back to when he asked you to move him, how nervous he was and how excited you were.

It was movie night at Spencers house. Each week he invited everyone over to watch a film, everyone taking it in turns to select a film. This week Emily had chosen Midsommar, a film you were yet to see so you were excited. You were sat beside Spencer on the loveseat, his arm around you and your face resting against his chest, a blanket covering you both for extra comfort. You looked up and saw Derek and Penelope lay spread across the floor whilst JJ and Emily sat on the sofa. Bowls of popcorn and sweets were scattered around the room and beer bottles were piling up. It was nights like this that you wanted to treasure forever, for the first time you felt like you had a family, people to call your own, people you could trust.

"Watcha thinking about?" Spencer asked, glancing at you and realising your mind wasn't directed at the movie anymore.

"Nothing, just really lucky to have you in my life," You reached your hand up to hold his face and gave him a soft kiss. "I love you."

He pulled you in closer if that was even possible, "I love you too."

"Ugh, get a room." Derek groaned making you both chuckle.

Spencer responded by throwing some popcorn at him, "Aw is someone jealous, don't worry you'll find someone soon enough."

Derek murmured a quiet, "Fuck off" before turning his attention back to the movie, making everyone laugh.

The movie ended shortly and everyone was discussing what to watch next, you were in the mood for a comedy but Derek wanted to watch Die Hard for the millionth time. After several minutes of slight arguing, you finally decided on rewatching Moana for the 12th time.

Everyone was pretty much settled, drinks refilled, popcorn replenished and everyone back in their positions. Emily was about to press play before JJ stopped her, "Wait before you start I'm kinda cold can I borrow a sweater?" She asked Spencer.

"Yeah sure, take one from our room." He said casually like it was normal but it made your breath hitch in your throat, did he just say our room? As in, yours and his. Unofficially he wasn't wrong, it was your room as much as his, you spent pretty much every night here making having your own apartment redundant, but he hadn't yet asked you to move in with him. You couldn't help the small blush on your face and the way your lips turned upwards at his words. It made you happy knowing he thought of it as something for both of you.

"What has you so happy?" Penelope asked in a teasing tone, she'd picked up on Spencer words and knew exactly why you were smiling.

You just stuck your tongue out at her and looked up at Spencer, "Our room huh?" You asked making him smile.

"Yeah I mean, you're here every day, maybe more than I am. You should just move in at this point." He let out a little laugh after he said leaving you confused as to whether he was being serious, so you just laughed along and waited for JJ to come back so you could start the movie.

A couple of hours later almost everyone was half asleep, everyone apart from you and Spencer. You began making your way to his room followed by him carrying the blanket he had taken from his bed. The two of you went about your night routine, Spencer had insisted on keeping at least half of your things at his place hence why you never had to leave. You quickly changed into one of his shirts which fit you just right and climbed into bed where he was already sitting, reading a book.

"Spence, were you being serious...earlier when you said I should move in?" You asked him, making him put down his book and look at you.

"Would you like that? You don't have to say yes but I would love it if you moved in. The mornings when I wake up and you're still next to me, are the best mornings. Honestly, knowing I'm going to wake up next to you makes falling asleep easier. Plus Tesla and Edison love you, maybe even more than they loves me." He asked, the mention of his fish making you laugh despite the fact your eyes were welling up, what had you done to deserve the sweetest man to walk the earth.

You shifted yourself so you were straddling him and held his face in your hands, "I would love to move in with you." You answered placing a soft kiss to his lips.

"I love you so much," He said as you moved back to laying down next him. "You make me the happiest man alive and I'm so lucky to have you."

"God, Spence you gotta stop before I start crying, I love you too." You said, as he laughed and pulled you into a comfortable sleeping position.

"Goodnight love." He mumbled, already falling asleep.

"Goodnight Spence." You responded, closing your eyes and beginning to drift off but not before saying, "By the way, the fishies definitely love me more."

You hadn't realised you were crying until a tear fell onto the frame you were holding. The image just as blurred as the memories it held. You carefully placed the image face down onto the table rather than placing it back up. Making your way to the sofa, you got your phone out and glanced at the image that had left you in this state. A picture of him and her, his hands holding hers as tight as they once held yours, the grin on both of their faces wide. He was happy, only it wasn't because of you anymore. You closed your eyes again, remembering how it all ended.

He had been distant since he had come back from this last case, he had been away for almost two months trying to catch this unsub and you had thought he'd be more excited to come back to you and finally be home. But he hadn't spent more than 10 minutes with you, the only time the two of you were in the same room for longer than that was when you fell asleep. Recently that had also stopped, he spent more nights away from home and at clubs with Derek and Emily , only coming back once he knew you weren't there. It was killing you but every time you questioned it he shrugged you off, telling you he loved you.

You wanted to scream at him if he loved you why isn't he showing it, why does he refuse to acknowledge you. You knew he was lying to you, he didn't love you anymore, you could see it in his eyes, how he never looked at you as he used to, he never held you like he used to. It was killing you and you knew you should ask him but you also knew that would lead to conversation you didn't want to have, an ending you didn't want to happen. So you kept quiet, went about your day and didn't question his actions, you had decided you would rather have the worst of him than not have him at all.

But that didn't last long. A few weeks later something happened, something you could ignore. Spencer had barely been home, only coming back to grab new clothes and leaving again often returning at 4 am or not all. The nights you spent alone, his side of the bed going cold broke your heart bit by bit. But you weren't ready for it to completely shatter, the images Penelope sent you of him holding that girl, a little too close, a little too tight, a little too much, start to fill your screen causing a lump in your throat and tears threatening to spill. You walked to the kitchen, surprised to see him there, he was sat at the counter head in his hands and a coffee in front of him.

"Spencer, what fuck is going on?" You all but shouted.

"Shh, my heads killing me." He said, burying his head in his hands attempting to block you out.

"You fucking asshole." You screamed at him, the pain and hurt evident in your broken voice as you tried your best not to cry.

This made him look up, far quicker than he should've causing his head to fill with pain and throb, but he didn't care, the memories of last night were coming back he knew he had fucked up. "I-I'm sorry, I was drunk and she was just there, nothing happened.

"You're sorry? Are you fucking kidding me?" You said, moving away from him as he got up to come closer to you. "No, don't fucking touch me. I'm done."

"What? No look I'm sorry, it won't happen again, I love you." The words were said, but the tone held so much uncertainty you couldn't tell if he was trying to convince you or himself.

"No you don't Spencer, not anymore. I know you don't and I've been lying to myself, saying that I'm ok with it when I'm not. I love you so much but I can't keep hurting myself by pretending like we're fine, We're not fine, we haven't been for a long time. Yes that fucking hurts, I thought we were forever, I thought we were going to grow old together and have kids and show them that we were soulmates. I thought we were perfect but we aren't."

"I never wanted to hurt you, I love you so much but-" He started with a sigh.

"You're not in love with me anymore..." You finished for him

"I'm so sorry. I wish things were different, I wish I could control how I felt. You were everything to me, I really did picture a future for us but things changed, I don't know why and I don't know how. You don't deserve this, I'm so sorry."

"I know Spence, I know." You moved closer to him and he held you like it was the last time... because it was. "I'm sorry too."

You pulled away from him."I'll grab some stuff and go stay at my mom's for a few days. I just need to find a new place to move my stuff to." You said, trying to brush some tears away but failing as they kept falling.

"No, it's fine. I'll go, this is just as much your home as it is mine. I'll stay with Derek for a bit, you take your time sorting stuff out ok?" He said, using his thumbs to attempt to wipe away your tears. You sighed but nodded knowing he wouldn't take no for an answer.

You sat down as he went to the room to gather some things, your mind reeling from the last half hour. How could so much change in such a short period of time, years spent together thrown away so quick.

"I'm done, I'll get going ok?" He said placing his duffel bag down beside by the door.

"So this is it huh?" You said, with a sigh. You felt him walk towards you and take a seat next to you.

"The last 10 years have been the most incredible time of my life, you put up with so much of my shit and loved me unconditionally and I can't thank you enough for giving the eager 25-year-old who wanted nothing more than to impress you a chance. I'm never going to stop loving you, you know that. I'm never gonna forget about you, my first love, the first woman to capture my heart. I'm so sorry things didn't work out like how we'd imagined them. If I could change how I feel I would, I wanted nothing more than for this to be a silly phase, for me to wake up one day and feel how I felt again. But it didn't happen and it fucking sucks."

"I get it, Spence, you have to do what makes you happy and I'm not gonna stop you. I'm just sorry it wasn't me that could give you want and need, but you're gonna make some girl out there very happy if you're even half the man you were when you were with me." You gave him a soft smile as he stroked your hair and kissed your forehead.

He stood up and walked to the door. "Call me when you're ready ok? I love you." He turned and gave you a soft smile before picking up his bag and walking out the door.

You just broke down, you don't know how long you sat there sobbing your heart out but it felt like forever. Everything hurt so bad you didn't think you'd ever feel any emotion other than heartbreak for as long as you lived.

You took a deep breath as your hand hovered over the delete button on your phone, it was time to move on just as he had. As you released the breath you were holding, your finger pressed against the button, deleting all the pictures you had with him and you felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders and the realisation sunk in.

You loved him so much, but he wasn't yours to love anymore.

He was just a memory.

tagged: @gcblers @187-reid @mgg-theprettiestboy @mggbler @snitchthewitch

#spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid angst #spencer reid blurb #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid smut #spencer fluff #my works!

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birthdaysentiment · 3 years

Note

hi its the anon that asked for fic recommendations! I’ve read some of them and IM IN LOVE so if you have more (with any storyline) I’d like to read them as well 🥰

hiii anon! i'm so happy you liked the fic recommendations. all of them is some of my personal favorites, so i was happy to share them with you. oml of course! i love talking about fics, so i would love to recommend more. i made a list underneath (because it got pretty long...), and i've tried to divide them as good as i could into tropes to make it a little easier. hope you’ll enjoy these fics too! ✨

robbe and sander: strangers to lovers (multi-chapter fics)

l. rotten work by aholynight on ao3. this is a complete fic with 5 chapters and it’s one of my all-time favorites. i've read it so many times, and it was also one of the first fanfictions i ever read. just the fact that robbe is a fire breather in this is enough to make it absolutely amazing, and just every chapter is so good and you just keep wanting more. there’s so much tension between robbe and sander and ahhh it’s just so good, i want to read it again!

ll. the night we met by @bxbyi (themoongirl on ao3). another complete fic, this time with 7 chapters with robbe as a writer. it’s such a sweet little detail, and i love it so much, because it sort of helps robbe to deal with some of the things he’s going through, and idk i just love the idea of robbe as a writer. the fic is also centered around liminal spaces and insomnia and how robbe and sander sort og bonds over it. again, another one of my favorites

lll. paint me in trust by @bxbyi (themoongirl on ao3). a complete fic with 7 chapters and vampire!sander that you never know you needed. this fic kinda has everything in terms of fluff and angst, and the fluff in the last chapters is just so good that i often go back to read it, just to jet my fix lol. the relationship between robbe and sander is so good and it’s so nicely written and another favorite of mine, because it’s so ahhh!

llll. money is (not) everything by @jxoxsxsxi (loenaadamson on ao3). a complete fic with 10 chapters, where sander is the rich kid with all the money and opportunities, but a life with no love and purpose until he meets robbe. this is the kind of fic you can read in a day because its so good. love the banter between them in the beginning and how in love they are. i remember that a chapter was posted every day for 10 days and oml what a ride!

v. the finest of the meadow by allforyoumylove on ao3. a complete fic with 6 chapters and probably one of the softest sobbe fics out there, where robbe and sander fall in love while meeting in a meadow. i love this so much, and everything about it is just so soft and sweet. how they’re both there for each other, how they take care of each other too, and just how amazingly sweet they are. and they’re stargazing, so... yeah that killed me

vl. remember my name by @sobbefairytales (ijzermans on ao3). another complete fic with 9 chapters and another personal favorite. who knew the reveal of a name could mean so much and possibly change so much for two young boys. this fic is another perfect example of pure fluff and angst and how well balanced it is. every chapter left you hanging, just desperately wanting to read the next one. it was such a journey and i still remember how empty i felt when i had read the last chapter. just love this one so much!

vll. swimmer sander by @bijvoorbeeldja - a complete fic here on tumblr with 4 chapters and a epilogue. sander as a swimmer is something i never knew i needed to see, and to have robbe take swimming lessons from sander too... i mean it was everything i wanted and more. this is so sweet and just to see them navigate through their relationship with sander’s carer on the side too. such a sweet fic full of fluff as well

vlll. i see you when you run from the light (within your eyes) by @womenstan (womenstan by ao3). this fic is a work in process, but it already has 2 chapters. this is another example of an au i never knew i needed until i read it, because seeing blind!sander and robbe fall in love is just the cutest thing ever. there’s so much fluff already and i'm so excited for every chapter to come. the way sander ‘sees’ robbe through touch makes me so emotional and ahhh i am already so hooked on this fic

vllll. waiting down at the station by ivy_seas on ao3. another work in process with 2 chapters already. seeing robbe and sander fall in love on a train is the cutest thing ever and when they start to see each other, outside of the train ride, i can just feel my heart starting to become a fluttering mess. it’s such a sweet story and i am so in love with the first two chapters and how the pacing is so far. there’s so much fluff already and we had a little taste of angst, so i'm excited to see what happens next!

x. five out of thirty by @tyrusmwm (tokenmwm on ao3). a work in process fic with a total of 18 chapters so far, where robbe and sander is having a long-distance relationship since robbe travels a lot for work. it’s written from robbe’s point of view in a first person narrator and i love that, because robbe’s thoughts and self-commentary is the best and funniest thing ever. sander is so in love with robbe, where robbe sometimes has a hard time expressing that, even though we know he’s so gone for him. this is a fic i'm always looking forward to reading the next chapter of

xi. ground control to us by @hopelessromanticvirgo. a complete social media au, with a couple of fic-style chapters too. this was one hell of a ride and i remember reading this in “real-time” and oml it was the best thing. it was also the first so/me au i read and i've been hooked on them ever since. sander is a famous singer, who starts to text with his biggest fan, who happens to be robbe, but robbed just doesn’t know it’s sander he’s texting with. there’s so much angst in this oml, but it’s all worth it because the fluff and their relationship is so good

sobbe: established relationship (multi-chapters)

l. to the one i love: fuck you by @hopelessromanticvirgo (reddlene on ao3). a complete fic with 13 chapters and one hell of a roller-coaster ride. i remember reading the first 11 chapters in one day and i didn’t know what to do with myself afterwards. in this fic you never really know what to believe and i love that, how you never really know what is going on until you get the answers. there’s so much angst but the ending is worth it

ll. vrijdag 21:37 by @wasteourdays (wasteourdaysdreaming on ao3) - complete fic with 7 chapters, but there could be more (as far as i understood). its centered around the same party, but in each chapter you see the party from a different characters point of view. this is actually the first sobbe fic i read and i still love it so much. there’s so many amazing scenes in it and all of it is so in character for them. love it so much and it’s just so good!

lll. visitations by @lucidpantone (lucidpantone on ao3) - another complete fic with 6 chapters where it’s sort of an established relationship, but also not, because this fic is quite a journey. it varies between scenes from the present and scenes from the past, but when we don’t know when they are in the past. the past is sort of helping the reader into understanding the present and what is happening, but it’s definitely a fic that gets better the more you read it because you start to understand everything more. it’s just such a good fic!

llll. "do i know you?" by @srta-pepa (srtapepa on ao3) - a work in progress with 15 chapters and only one to go. this fic has been a journey and oml what a ride. robbe lost his memory due to a car-crash and he doesn’t remember his relationship with sander, so already there there’s a lot of angst, but the fluff is there too and oml i am never getting tired of it. it’s such a sweet fic and it makes me sad to think it’s almost over, but i can’t wait for the last chapter either

sobbe: established relationship (one-shots)

l. the sun came up and i was looking at you by allforyoumylove on ao3. one of my all-time favorite one-shots with robbe and sander waking up on a sunday morning, just staying in bed, kissing and cuddling, and of course sander just being sander. love this so much and it’s just so full of fluff and everything you love and hold so close to your heart. i read this on a weekly basic because i just need that fix of sobbe fluff

ll. paper rings by @wlwharrys (thekardemomme on ao3). when sander has a bad day and robbe is just there for him, like he always is. there is so much fluff in this that your heart almost can’t take it, and even though there’s a very light slip on angst, it only makes the fluff better and ahhh it’s the cutest thing ever. sobbe in an established relationship always makes me go through the feels, to see how comfortable and safe they are with each other

lll. fizzy colas by @foxsake5 (foxsake5 on ao3). another one-shot that just makes you smile because it’s so sweet and so... heartwarming in a way. tipsy!robbe is one of my favorites and he’s just the absolute sweetest person on this earth and to see sander be so in love with him only makes it better. who knew a trip to the store to buy some candy could make you feel so much

llll. hold all my cliches on the tip of my tongue by @phascinationphases (nbrook on ao3). a fic that saved us from what happened on valentine’s day and brought back sander’s bleached hair, something that we all are hoping for (but something we’re probably never going to get.. *signs*). this is so cute and full of fluff and banter and teasing and just sobbe being best friends and boyfriends too. and the one-liners sander comes with is enough to make you get through the day

v. one night (and love) so young and beautiful by @birthdaysentiment (birthdaysentiment on ao3... yeah me)... well i had to do a little advertisement for my own little one-shot lol. idk it’s definitely not the best out there, but people who know me, knows how much i need to see robbe and sander make out against a wall and slow-dance together, so i wrote a one-shot about that and just included everything that i love... so yeah enjoy i guess

sobbe: other tropes

l. you're my stars... and everything in between by @robbesdriesen (aurorawinds on ao3). a one-shot with the trope secret relationship (a trope we don’t have enough fics with). this is so amazing and it’s inspired by romeo & juliet so do i even need to say more? they’re so in love and when they’re held back from being together, the angst is just right there, but the fluff that comes after... i mean my heart is melting just thinking about it

ll. just friends by @sincerelysobbe (sincerelysobbe on ao3) - a complete fic with 4 chapters and robbe and sander being friends with benefits, until they realize that they just want to be together. this is such an amazing fic, and to see sander be so head over hells in love with robbe is just the best thing. they’re so sweet together, the way they can’t help but look at each other and just wishing they were more than just friends. i just love it!

lll. this isn't our first time around by noobishere on ao3. one of my favorite one-shots that idk how to explain lol. but it’s just robbe and sander traveling through different alternative universes where they always seem to be together or have some kind of connection, but just not in the one they’re living in, but maybe all the traveling can change that. i love the whole concept of it and it’s just so clever and i need to reread this again asap, because it’s so good

llll. if i asked you first, would you be my prince? by @sonderthroughthestreets and @to-enter-polaris (createdforyou and isaksliveterna on a3). a work in progress with t2o chapters already. i’ve always wanted a ballet!sobbe fic, so when i heard about this fic i was already hooked. in this universe robbe and sander are a part of the same ballet company and they’re both fighting for the same spot in the next big play. it’s an enemies to lovers fic and even though it’s mostly angst right now, i can’t wait for the fluff to take over, because it’s gonna be so good

v. sincerely, always yours by @hopelessromanticvirgo. this is a social media au with a couple of fic-style chapters. this was such an emotional roller-coaster, not just for robbe and sander but also for you as a reader. the lack of communication from them was driving me crazy and the amount of times i wanted to pull my hair out just shows that this au was so good and one you just couldn’t help but get invested in. it’s sort of a best friends to lovers but also with a little enemies in it and just a lot of angst (like so much), but also a lot of fluff, that was just the best!

and... a couple of days ago i made a little overview over some robbe and sander fics with the tropes enemies to lovers and friends (best friends, childhood friends etc.) to lovers too, so if you want to, you can check that out here.

there’s over 800 sobbe fics at ao3 right now and so many drabbles and so/me au’s here on tumblr and all of them are just so amazing! (this is just a little snip of them all), so if you want more recommendations, or more sobbe stuff to read, then go to ao3 (under the sobbe tag) or try and search for them here on tumblr (under sobbe fic or wtfock fic). there’s so many amazing stories and the writers deserves all the credit for them!

so, once again i just want to say a massive thank you to every fic and drabble writer and just to all the content creators, because you keep me alive during this drought and the undeniable lack of sobbe. thank you for blessing me everyday and just thank you for everything you’re doing. sending you all lots of hugs and kusjes! ✨

#wtfock #wtfam #sobbe #cille's asks ✨

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dripkingpetey · 4 years

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love-e.pettersson

ive been working on this for a few days and im kinda proud of it! would love some feedback from you or requests for other story lines, i promise i’ll stop doing the friends to lovers storylines haha. i also accidentally deleted this and i was so sacred i couldnt get it back but here it is! i hope you enjoy.

*lowercase intended!*

2.2k words

he loves you, you know that right?

“why did you drag me here, i really don’t like hockey and you know that.” you said as you sighed to your bestfriend lucie while she pulls you down to your seats in rogers arena.

“i know you don’t.” lucie said with a bright smile on her face. “but, you’re gonna learn to like it.” you look at her in confusion. “so, this is your way of torturing me as if you don’t already torture me enough by bringing me to parties.” you said while sitting down and looking at the players who are starting to get on the ice. “maybe.” lucie said with a wide grin and a mischievous look on her face before puck drop starts.

you’ve never been big on hockey, which is surprising considering you have lived in vancouver your whole life and your family is super big hockey fans. you also aren't the most extroverted person. sure, you’d go out to bars sometimes but mostly just with your close friends.

“what part of this sport do you even like?” you said as the game is going into the third period the canucks are now up 4-1 against the opposing team which you don’t even really know who they are. “well, if I’m being honest some of them are really hot but mostly cause of the sport.” you scoffed at her response. “none of them are hot from where i can see.” lucie looked at you with a shocked look. “oh you’ll get it once you get to know the players more.” you give her a confused look and put your full attention back to the game.

canucks ended up winning the game 5-2, lucie was very happy about it and you could tell cause she wanted to go out for a couple drinks and you didn’t want to say no so you agreed to go.

you had been at the bar for about twenty minutes and lucie was already gone which isn’t surprising, she was probably sleeping with some guy right now.

you started to panic a little when a creepy old dude came up to you and started hitting on you. “hey pretty girl, want to come home with me?” he started putting his hand on your arm which was resting on the table. you look around for lucie in panic but she’s no where to be found.

you then feel a pair of arms sneak around your waist and you get even more freaked out.

“hey babe, sorry i was gone for so long.” elias says to you with a smile but then proceeds to give the creepy dude the alien death stare which worked. after the dude leaves elias faces you and starts speaking. “sorry i touched you like that, it looked like you were alone and that guy was creeping you out so i thought you could use some help.” he shoots an apologetic smile at you.

“its okay,” you give him a smile back. “thank you a lot actually, i have no idea where my friend went.” you take another look around the bar before looking back and him.

“i’m elias by the way.” he smiles at you while holding his hand out for you to shake it. “y/n.” you say before shaking his hand.

“so elias, what are you doing in this bar on a thursday night?” you gesture for him to sit down next to you. “if i told you, you wouldn’t believe me.” elias lets out a soft laugh while sitting down across from you. “tell me, i wanna know.” elias sighs lightly before he starts speaking again. “i’m with them,” he gestures over to brock, jake, quinn, thatcher and troy. you look over to see them all waving at you and laughing at elias, you laugh softly and wave back at the before turning your attention back to elias. “ah, so i’m guessing you’re on the canucks?”

elias lets out a nervous laugh. “yeah, why don’t we go somewhere else where the boys aren’t up my ass?” you take another sip out of your drink. “i would love to.” he holds out his hand for you and as you guys walk out you can hear the guys chirping, but when you look over to elias you can see him giving the death stare to the boys and it makes you laugh. “you have a scary death stare jeez.” elias leads you to his car. “that’s surprisingly what the fans love me for.” he smiles at you before opening the car

door for you.

“…and that’s all what led me to being on the canucks.” elias said to you while eating a chip out of the chip bowl you had prepared. it had been a couple hours since you guys left the bar and went back to your apartment, you don’t know why but it felt like you and elias had such a strong bond already that you both felt like you can talk for hours and hours and never get tired of each other, he felt the same way too. “jeez, i kinda sound like a douche. i’ve been talking about myself all night, please tell me more about you.” elias said to you while you laughed at his words.

“it’s all good, i’ve been the one asking questions anyways.” you smiled while responding to him. “no seriously, tell me something about you before i have to go which i really don’t want to by the way.”

you look at the time and realize its almost twelve am so you proceed to give him a quick response. “well, i’ve lived in vancouver my whole life. and i’m currently going to ubc as a nursing student.” you smiled at his now very amused face.

“see, that’s something i wouldn’t have known if you didn’t say it,” he laughs a little before he finishes his sentence. “can i get your number? i have practice early tomorrow morning but i’m free for the rest of the day if you want to hang out.”

you smile at his words and take his phone from him. “of course you can, i’m free tomorrow too just give me a call.” you said while handing his phone back to him after you’ve entered your number. elias gives you a wide grin and you both get up so you could walk him to the door. “goodnight elias.” you look up at him with a smile as he’s standing in the doorway. “goodnight y/n, sweet dreams.” he said and then started to walk down the hallway towards the elevator. “pettersson!” you called out at him and he turns around confused. “text me when you get home.” he gives you the thumbs up and you close your door and head to bed.

no ones ever shown this much attention to elias before, at least no one he’s truly cared about.

he smiled to himself on his drive home cause he was excited to text you again.

*contact name changed to “y/n<3”*

text message to y/n<3:i just got home, thank you for the awesome night :).

it’s been a couple weeks since you and elias had met at the bar, you basically hung out with each other anytime you could.

you were each others best friends at this point, sure the guys would make fun of elias for being in love with you but you couldn’t see it, elias knows he has some feelings for you but he wasn’t sure about it yet. he also didn’t want to risk the amazing friendship you guys had started.

“hey, are you coming to the game tonight?” elias asked over the phone to you.

you let out a sigh before you start speaking. “i’ll try, schools been really hard lately but i should be able to finish studying tonight.” elias could hear the tiredness in you voice and it hurt him to see you like this. “y/n, its okay. you don’t have to try and make it, focus on school its way important. you have many more games of mine that you can watch.” he left out a soft chuckle at the end of his sentence.

“i’ll still try though, i’ll give you a text if i can make it.” you said to him as you looked at the last large text book you had to read through and look at the giant pile of coffee cups surrounding your desk.

“okay, love you, i gotta go.” “love you too e, good luck.” you both quickly exchanged goodbyes as you started reading your last text book. you knew there was no way you were going to be able to make it to his game tonight and you felt really bad, you sighed it off as you put your attention back to studying and occasionally looking at the canucks game that was now playing on your tv.

the game had ended, canucks lost by one but petey is a sore loser so obviously he was sad, which made him show up at your apartment, he brought pizza from your favourite place downtown.

you were passed out on the couch though, which resulted in elias having to pull out his spare key and sneaking into your apartment.

“elias?” you mumbled out as you felt him sit next to where you were laying on the couch, he motioned for you to lay you head on his lap and you did.

“hey sleepy girl, i brought our favourite pizza.” he said to you with a smile. no matter how bad of a day elias was having, you could always make him smile.

you positioned your head so you’re now facing up at him and you give him a big smile. “thank you, can we snuggle and watch a movie?” elias starts rubbing your cheek softly. “of course we can y/n.”

the night ended with you and elias falling asleep on the couch together while watching a movie he had picked out, you both forgot about all the stress from today and just enjoyed the moment.

“he loves you, you know that right?” brock said to you as he came by and sat next to you.

it was the start of summer, tanev decided to host a little barbecue for the whole team before everyone left vancouver and went back to their home towns for the summer.

you were sitting in the backyard watching elias talk to huggy. “what?” you said to brock with confusion. “no he doesn’t.”

brock scoffed at your response. “dude, you can’t be serious. how do you not see it.”

you thought about what brock said for awhile before you gave him a response. “does he talk about me?” you looked at brock while taking a sip of your drink.

“does he talk about you? of course he fucking does y/n, all the time. especially when you don’t show up to our games, it’s worse when we’re on the road.”

you smile to yourself at what brock said.

you were quite tipsy by the end of the night and elias didn’t want to let you go home alone, so you spent the night at his place.

“elias?” you said in your sweet drunken tone as you both settled into his bed, and you faced your body in his direction.

“yes?” he said while playing with your hair softly.

“brock said something to me earlier,” you said while pulling your body close to his.

“of course he did,” he said with a sigh. “what’d he say this time?”

“apparently you talk about me a lot?” you said with a soft laugh and your fingers now tracing up and down his back.

“yeah, yeah i do. i talk shit about you all the time.” he says sarcastically knowing where this conversation was going.

“hey!” you said as you playfully punched him. “i was going to do something but i guess not anymore.” you said with a huff.

he lifts your chin up to face him. before you knew it you guys were kissing each other, it was a soft, long and sweet kiss.

elias pulled away with a big grin on his face and you did too. you talked to each other for the rest of the night, you ended up falling asleep before elias did but he did too shortly after.

you woke up to the smell of elias making waffles, you hugged him from behind and he didn’t even notice you were awake until you did that.

“it smells really good,” you said to elias before kissing his cheek and begging for him to hug you.

he pulls you into his grip and whispers in your ear. “do you wanna go to sweden with me for the summer?”

you look up at him with slight shock. “yeah, why not.” you said to him with a smile and he gets very excited and spins you around, you kiss for awhile until you smell something burning and you pull away.

“shit.” elias mumbles as he deals with the burnt waffles and you’re both laughing your asses off.

#elias pettersson #elias pettersson x reader #elias pettersson imagine #petey #pettersson #nhl canucks #vancouver canucks #canucks hockey #canucks #vancouver canucks x reader #nhl #nhl imagine #nhl hockey

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pjinthestreets · 2 years

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i am saying this to myself no one read my cringe bleach postcanon

ok but this is what goes down though: renji+rukia marriage. im just saying it happens. im just saying ichigo and orihime would come? come on they saved Da Soul Socielty like seven times they can RSVP. fuckin

momo comes too obviously.. obviously kira is invited and stuff but hes zombifried and not exactly the life of the party no one rly wants him there and he does not want to go. not actly important if he shows up but i Do think the angst factor would be tastey like if hes on the side like conspicuously Just Standing There. alright ive Shown My Face gotta go :|

momo also on da side like hm yep lovely shindig let me just :) have one more drink :) tee hee lovely party guys! im crying because im just very happy for the happy couple GOTTA LOVE IT OK ILL BE OUTSIDE GETTING SOME AIR

orihime outside Actually getting air (lotta people she barely knows carousing and being. You Know.) like o hi uhh Miss. (FUCK I KNOW IVE SEEN HER BEFORE WHAT WAS HER NAME UHHH) Hows it going? Oh my god shes crying GIRL CRYING ALERT SUPPORTIVE MODE ACTIVATED

momo, kinda tipsy and a little bit totally miserable: no its fine its nice! i just kind of pictured things differently you know! i should be happy for them! but i keep thinking about how i was gonna get married someday. selfish right

orihime: :( babe no. come here. sweetheart. youre beautiful theres lots of time to find love! besides arent shinigami like immortal? :)? the right person is out there for you i promise!

momo, definitely tearing up now: no its not that i actually had someone. but like. thats the problem lol

orihime: ???

orihime: oh god. :( thats so sad i

hang on

like still alive type corpse? like has part of his own reiatsu still intact type walking around making everyone uncomfortable type ohhhh yeah actually that sounds like. a solveable problem to me

momo: ?!?!?!!!?!?!?!?!?!

orihime: yeah man if you can get him to consent i can almost definitely revive him with my godlike powers. nobody seems to remember this but i am almost the most powerful guy in this narrative

kira an indeterminate amount of time later: i dont rly see how this is going to improve things for my actual. utility as a killing machine. which is all i am good for etc etc sad boy noises

momo, clinging to sanity by a fucking shred at this point: shut the fuck up and get good dude you cannot imagine the stress this situation has put me under

orihime: cool alright let me juuuuust

kira: OH GOD IM ALIVE JESUS CHRIST I CAN FEEL EVERYTHING

momo: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

rose, like 25 miles away: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

mayuri, who definitely just lost a pet project and is prepared to argue intellectual property rights AFTER taking it out in Blood: what are u doing with my personal property i fuckin made that thing >:(

rose, finally getting a chance to use that sweet sweet bankai that got like 2 panels of airtime: you know for some reason it didnt occur to me until just now that someone else could do your job :) die :)

* le epic battle* [30+ episodes (colloquially known as the ‘mayuri eats shit forever’ arc)]*

downside to this is we may never get that sweet hoodie look on izuru. im gonna hazard that a guy who kinda gets his power and entire like character scheme from themes of despair, pain, and disempowerment mayyyy be cheated out of a bankai by this move. but it is simply the sacrifice we will have to make for the constantly-shafted-side-characters-get-their-happy-ending (and, can’t emphasize this enough, mayuri eats shit and dies forever) arc

#tee hee #bleach #i promise that reading this will give you brain damage #shut up about the cringe factor im well aware #THIS WAS LITERALLY LIKE 30K ON MY OLD HARDDRIVE RIP #yes its me 'negotiating with demons' ao3 yes im still thinking about following it up #you can ship kira/momo or not but you gotta admit shed make the same move platonically.....#my guy kira

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tscmu · 4 years

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first dates with haikyuu boys :)

pt 1. - msby black jackals

genre; kinda fluff idk?? just kinda cute early relationship tings

warnings; secondhand embarassment, lil suggestive comments ( from atsumu who am i kidding )

characters; bokuto, atsumu, hinata + sakusa

all characters r timeskip and 18+ !!

koutarou bokuto

- bruh youd be terrified for this date like.. a guy youve hardly spoken to with a massive personality asking you to meet him at a tiny cafe.. ok

- hed love tiny cafes though like the ones nobody are in so its just you two.. AWH

- dates wouldnt be a massive thing to him so youd be dressed up casual formal with light makeup on and hed strut off the bus in his kit literally sweating, just left practice and youd be like 😳

- you wouldve met him at a club like a week back when you were both off your faces and youd wake up the next morning with no idea what happened the night before, just like 10 texts from someone with the contact name ‘BokJUt OWks MAn’ asking you on a date.. why wouldnt u say yeah??

- it would go rly well !!

- i think itd be a bit slow at first, like youre both describing your lives when.. it happens

- youre both just aimlessly chatting, both tuning in and out of conversation waiting for the food to come when.. you hear it. the thing that you did that you thought NOBODY else did. and he does it.

- “and one of my roommates tsumu always yells at me because i collect stamps-” “WAIT YOU COLLECT STAMPS?? ME TOO BRUH”

- youd both have a joint aneurysm literally

- after that youd be infatuated with eachother ITD BE SO CUTE

- youd get the bill both like a lil tipsy, heading further into the town to just go window shopping in the moonlight

- UWUWUWUWUWUWU pls

- then hed accidentally set off the jewellery shop alarm pointing at a pretty ring and poking the glass too hard-

- when your taxi came he’d be really sad.. then as you close the door hed just jump in and find his own way home HAHAHA

- 10/10 date would do again.. and you did

atsumu miya

- oh you would be EXCITED

- until you found out his suggestion.. one of his own fucking games

- you just cut it down to the fact that he was a personal volleyball player, he was probably busy, yk?? but no it was because he wanted to show off to you🙄🙄

- you met him on the street like he literally picked you up on the street.. only he yall only he

- well of course you liked him have you seen him

- you exchanged numbers and were texting for like a week ( where he just begged you to come to a game ) before finally you said ok

- because its a date you didnt wanna bring along someone else so you just kinda showed up on your own and followed the crowd.. before finding out you were on the WRONG SIDE OF THE COURT

- he teased you about this for years to come and you wanted to burst out crying every time

- after finally finding the right seat on the RIGHT SIDE, the players came out and.. lets say you were surprised

- you didnt know that much about volleyball beforehand but.. d a m n

- those uniforms were hot😳😳

- the game went well and they won ( to his extreme happiness ), and then you finally got to meet him again

- it was subtle at first, like while he was signing shirts hed look over his shoulder and wink or something lmao

- thats until hinata and bokuto got to the area you were at and went feral, killing tsumus whole vibe HAHA

- “OH SHIT THATS THE GIRL HE INVITED!!” “WAIT IS IT- OH HI Y/N!! HES BEEN TALKING ABOUT YOU FOR AGES HE EVEN JE-” “BRO FUCK OFF”

- to which you just laughed your head off about

- bro he gave you a kiss on the cheek when he walked over making all the fangirls go absolutely feral.. twitter talked abt it for AGES even after you revealed you were dating 2 months after it happened

- you had to wait around for HOURS whilst he talked to interviewers.. struggles of being famous🥶‼🔥

- but it was worth it ofc

- he took you out to this lil restaurant when he finally got away and even walked u home.. such a gentleman damn

- “so when can i see you again.. and maybe a bit more ;)” “sHUT UP-”

- lets just say u definitely did that again-

shoyo hinata

- oh my god hed be more nervous than you were

- hed overdress like.. not full suit but pretty damn close

- i feel like hed not be that focused on women?? the volleyball grind comes first yk

- but when he made eye contact w you across the meeting table.. jeez he went feral

- bro when he was asked a question he couldn’t function you were just like ??

- atsumu basically had to ask you out for him after it finished he was so nervous HAHA

- you called him cute when he pulled up and he genuinely turned into a tomato like.. ushijima would farm him if he saw him

- hed book you a table at this really fancy restaurant ( with a lil financial help from kenma ) and you were genuinely shocked lmao

- i feel like youd work with the jackals as like a promoter or sumn and hed just be shocked.. like he didnt know you even existed bruh??

- because of that hed be pretending hed had his eye on you for a while ( to which you just laughed knowing he was trying to be cool )

- hed tell you to order something expensive but you knew how much those guys got paid.. yeah no.

- but hed warm up MASSIVELY like by the end of it after a glass and a bit of wine youd both be like peas in a pod literally

- youd go for a lil walk around the city centre before u found a taxi.. HED BE SO SAD LIKE HE DIDNT WANT IT TO END??

- hed go in for the kiss i know he would

- youd be like ??? but kiss him back bc why wouldnt u hes a baby

- best date you’d had in a couple years by far

kiyoomi sakusa

- you literally wouldnt realise it was a date until the end i stg this man

- hed deadass show up to ur door and be like ‘cmon’ and youd be like EXCUSE ME SIR-

- i feel like you wouldve known eachother for at LEAST a couple months

- and he wouldve just done NOTHING like you didnt even know he felt a romantic connection to you

- but trust me he did

- he just didnt know the words to say :(

- but this is what the lads told him to do LMAO

- before u knew what was happening you were in the backseat of a taxi and he was telling them a street in the middle of the city-

- “oh we’re going out to dinner” “wha- i didnt bring my purse tho-” “eh.” literally

- you were kinda surprised because you knew how much he hated crowds and dinner in the city seemed unlike him, more like something you would enjoy

- but thats exactly why he did it

- youd pull up and do a double take when he was asking for a table.. WHO THE FUCK WAS SITTING AT THE BACK OF THE RESTAURANT

- however after being motioned to shut up by atsumu you acted like you saw nothing

- it was just like the other times youd hung out but he was a little more.. interested in you

- not like suggestive, he just genuinely was asking about like how your day was, etc IT WAS CUTE AS HELL

- it was at that point you realised oh shit, this might be a date-

- when it was over you suggested going into the city and looking in shops for a bit, but the restaurant filled with people was enough for him lmao

- you got a taxi back and were standing outside your apartment door when he did something hed never done before

- MANS HUGGED YOU

- it was then you realised.. did he actually like you??

- spoiler he did

- and things were different between you ever since IM UWUING PLS

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sluttyten · 3 years

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Okay speaking of boobs I have a weird question. I’m a virgin (so I’m not too knowledgeable about sexuality but I know enough) and I’m bi. I have a friend. We’ve been friends since middle school and are now 21 year olds. He’s gay tho. So just for some background~~

im so open about my boobs bc I was flat chested until I was 16 so now I’m just v happy w them. I’ve let my friends (including guy friends) see my boobs a few times. like if I needed an opinion on a nude or smth lol it all started when I sent 1 to the gc while tipsy and since then we just had no real boundary w that I guess. my friends are all either very progressive heteros or queer. But my one gay friend who is definitely into guys and has never expressed interest in girls (actually sometimes seems repulsed by vag) really likes my boobs. Like the most out of everyone. so sometimes he’s just like “can I see them” ? Or when he texted me and said he’s having a bad day and I joked saying I’ll snapchat him a boob pic and he seriously asked me to...so I’m just ? It’s become almost a normal part of our friendship over the past 8 months. Even in person. I’ve allowed him to touch my boobs (once without clothes and he was just really into it but it’s usually with clothing). Idk what he’s doing with the mental images or if he gets off or if this is just a platonic thing of his but whenever I joke and say he’s acting like a straight man he gets weird.

The last incident was almost a month ago. And I remember cus I got in an argument with the girl I’m currently talking to romantically about it. I cut down on it bc I really like this girl and even tho I am single I want to be respectful of her feelings. (I mean I might be offended if I knew ppl were touching her boobs so I want to consider her feelings). Anyways my friend had accidentally hit me in the chest lmao and I told him I was sore (on my cycle) and he said he’d massage them and he was serious but I said no. Bc idk that seemed too intimate. But when I brought it up to my “partner” she said that she didn’t find it funny and he seemed to be using me in a way. Which I never really looked at it that way bc he’s not attracted to women. Yeah this was all over the place I hope you don’t mind 😂

My question is like I don’t want to be -phobic by assuming his sexuality just based on that but also it’s effecting me lol and I’m fine with the whole thing if there was more like honesty and direction. but at the same time I don’t wanna be someone’s like hidden fetish or kink. The more I ask myself how I feel about it the more I’m like hmmm idk what he’s struggling with but it’s making our friendship awkward. I asked my other friend who’s a gay male the same thing and he found it extremely off putting. Which I kinda regret telling him bc I feel like he’s judging him a bit too much like it’s not something that’s a big deal bc he’s not pressuring or making me uncomfortable like I’ve been completely okay with it and it’s usually fun up until this point. I’m gonna look into it some more tho to figure out how to approach him about it.

I think your friend might not be as gay as he thinks he is if he likes your boobs so much, he might be no and struggling to come to terms with that or something

#asks

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abdicatedarchive · 3 years

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Cherish’s House Party || Chase and Savvy

𝐖𝐇𝐄𝐍: cherish’s house party // 15th of january.

𝐅𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: chase x savvy ( @savvy-cassidy ).

𝐓𝐑𝐈𝐆𝐆𝐄𝐑𝐒: underage drinking.

𝐃𝐄𝐓𝐀𝐈𝐋𝐒: two cheerleaders playing ping pong and having a good time gossiping

Chase had come over to find beer pong in the kitchen and no one to play with until he saw Savvy. "Savvy, I challenge you to a game of pong" he said as he pulled her over to the table lightly. "That is if you can take the heat" Chase teased as he racked up the cups. Gabrielle was off doing something, and he always enjoyed talking to Savannah. Maybe he would even hear some good gossip out of it.

Savvy was, as usual, sipping on her drink and mingling around the party. That is, until she was ushered over to the beer pong table. "when have i ever not been able to take the heat?" she scoffed and finished off the drink in her head. "good thing i get better at this game the more i drink," the brunette was already a bit tipsy.

"I mean that's just the science behind it" said Chase laughing a little, "once you have double vision then you get two cups at once" he joked. Once the cups were racked he grabbed two balls and washed them off in the sink. "Ladies first" he said as he handed her the ping pong balls and went to his side of the table. "So tell me, have you seen anything interesting at the party so far?" Chase asked.

"i think i just try harder when my vision is blurry so i really work twice as hard on trying to have good aim," she commented with a laugh. "how polite of you. not too many of the males around here have manners," she joked. taking the ball she took her shot, seeing it bounce off of one of the rims. "off to a great start. hm. ive been in two bedrooms and neither were occupied at the time i stumbled upon them, i thought that was pretty interesting because that never happens. also, staci poured a full beer down sara's shirt when she told her to be careful not to spill it."

"Well, I was in the cheer chat during the men suck discussion, so I'm on my best behavior" he said sarcastically, he didn't mind. Especially when it came to all the girl's boyfriends being kind of shit. There had been a lot of newly single moments recently on the team in general. He was happy with his girlfriend so hating on men was definitely an option, it kept him in line with his own relationship. Chase caught the ball when it bounced off the rim and held it while he waited for her to throw again. "Well Sara had it coming with that comment, and you never tell someone with a full cup to do anything" he joked, "Staci's got low impulse control that's for sure". "to be fair, i think we all have our moments of sucking so dont worry it isn't just men," although they did seem to have far more moments, but that was beside the point and she didn't feel the need to bring it up. on her next attempt, she sank the ball, "yesss hopefully now im getting somewhere. and you're right on both of those counts. what about you what interesting things have you seen thus far?" Chase took the ball out of the cup and chugged the whole thing. "Well" he said catching his breath, "I saw one guy constantly changing rooms, so I investigated a little" he said throwing his first ball and it sinking into the cup. "And it turns out he is talking to two girls at this party, and I am 30% sure they are texting each other about this cute mystery guy that they're talking to" Chase said as he tried the other ball and missed. "So I cannot wait to see how that turns out" Savvy lifted her brows as he took a breath, knowing that whatever he was about to say was probably quite the story. Lifting up the cup, she took out the ball and chugged the liquid, something a good friend of hers had taught her to do well over the years. "dont they know that the circles around here are small? its like we've all slept with each other by association."

"Everybody is sleeping with everybody" said Chase letting a small laugh fall from his lips as he waited for her to throw again. "Speaking of, who is your newest conquest? I have to live vicariously through others now that I'm back with Gabrielle" he said, intrigued to know what the girl was up to. She was one of the most beautiful girls in school, it only made sense that she had guys at her beck and call. "That is putting it lightly," she chuckled, setting down the now empty cup and setting up her next shot. it circled the rim of the cup a couple of times before finally sinking inside. "conquest? you mean like, have i hooked up with anyone tonight? chase. im a lady. you think i do that kind of thing at a party where there are loads of people who could walk in at any moment?" the girl was rambling playfully before eventually answering, "jet." mostly because everyone likely already knew anyway, it happened at most parties. it was like knowing that someone was going to end up throwing up in the bushes, jet and savvy were going to hook up. "how is that going?" "A lady never tells" said Chase, knowing full well that there was always Jet. He was hoping there was maybe some variety in there, but Jet was ... well he was kinda it. He was that guy in town for sure. "Oh that's still going?" he said with a smile, "He is super hot, and I heard he's very good in bed. Good for you" Chase replied. Chase chugged the cup and put it to the side before continuing. "It's going great, it's a race right now to see who is the drunker one and who is in charge of getting us home. I'm hoping she's the responsible one tonight, but who is to say at this rate. She could be off taking shots with Juliette right now, and they're both so tiny they'll be on the floor in minutes" the boy said with a laugh. "We have a nice arrangement. It's very convenient. Plus, I wont have to worry I won't get off, which is definitely a big plus. Like an old, yet reliable habit." Savvy had to laugh at her own description, the alcohol definitely making her sound a little ridiculous. "Maybe someone else will get a turn, i just dont really want it to be when i have beer goggles, because ew." Crinkling her nose at the thought she shook her head. "so who do you think is winning? how drunk are you?" "I get that, what you know is better than something new. And if it works for you, then why bother with anything else" said Chase, completely understanding. That was something about being with Gabrielle that he loved, it was always good because they had been at it for so long. "She only drinks liquor so probably her, but it has been me before and I am working my hardest at it" said Chase laughing a little, he didn't mind taking care of her at the end of the night. It was fun when she took care of him though. "Knowing her, it's who she is with. She can either drink a lot because she's having a really good time or a really bad time. But if it's in between she won't be drunk at all ... just a little buzzed" “Something new can be exciting, if it’s the right something new,” Sav pointed out with a shrug. “It is always nice to have a safe option though too.” Because who didn’t like options. “Yikes she could be going pretty hard right now. So that will not be a fun morning for her. “ "It can be, but I am a sucker for the classics. Only one girl out there for me" said Chase with a small smile. He was soft for Gabrielle like that, sure he would be having a great deal more fun as a single guy at this school, but there was nothing that beat to comfort of being loved. "She'll be fine. No matter what I'll make her breakfast, even if I'm about to yak" said the boy.

“Oh isn’t that just adorable,” to be fair, there was a time when Savvy may have thought the same thing, when she was dating someone she liked to think it would be for the long haul but that was rarely the case. “Breakfast too? Damn you really are one of the good ones.” "Yeah the perks of her family taking me in, we get to spend every morning together no matter what rooms we sleep in" said Chase with a proud smile. He also treated her very well, just going above and beyond whenever he could. It made him feel like he was repaying a debt to her family. "What do your mornings with Jet look like? Or is it purely a party affair?" he asked, curious to know more. “That is a pretty unique situation so I guess you should enjoy it as long as possible because you lucked out there. Do they let you stay in the same room though?” Sav was glad that her friend was happy though it seemed to be going well and that’s what was most important. Her brows raised at his question “we usually have each other for breakfast,” she answered as if it was nonchalant. “And then go out for pancakes because were fucking starving.” "Yeah, I am milking it as much as physically possible" said Chase in all earnesty. He was certain they would not separate for college, but if they didn't get into the right schools then they would be screwed. Having a child together, even though it was a secret bonded them past the usual high school relationship, but it was hard to explain that to anyone because he couldn't. "That's a hearty breakfast, lots of vitamin d in that one" Chase joked, proud of himself for that one. "Pancakes is always a good dessert after a hearty breakfast" “I can’t say that I blame you, I think most people would do the same thing. But hey im glad that it works out for you and you’re both happy with it, that’s honestly all that matters,” the girl nodded with a shrug. She couldn’t help but chuckle, “vitamin d, good joke. Best of the night so far. But agreed pancakes are the best. A nice way to refuel.” "You can tell who at this school has a major vitamin d deficiency" said Chase with a small chuckle as well. There were a lot of people who just needed some kind of release, any kind. Whether it was a boxing class or getting laid, people needed to do something.

Savvy couldn’t help but chuckle and nod in agreement, “you are correct about that, I wish them all the best, honestly. Might help some of their piss poor attitudes.” "I think that might be our big ticket to victory this cheer season" said Chase feeling the alcohol start to hit him. He hated to admit it, but a lot like his girlfriend he was a light weight.

"everyone getting laid? you might be on to something with that," she chuckled and nodded in agreement, "you down for the count on this game, or what? i can already see your eyes getting glassy, you're sucha lightweight," she teased him. "I did some shots earlier, but I think it's all kicking in now" said Chase, the room was a little spinny. "All I am is bone and muscle, there's nothing to absorb the alcohol" he said to defend himself, but it was the honest reason he couldn't handle too much to drink.

#chasexsavvy #threads || savvy and chase #savvy and chase || 001

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istheresomebodywhocanimagine · 5 years

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I Have Confidence (SMUT)

anonymous said: bitch u better FEED me some Ben smut you’re like one of the only good writers in this fan base and I throw it BACK for Ben so idk do something with drunk y/n and ben and it’s playful and y/n is kinda needy or literally write whatever u want I’ll fucking cash app u sis I’m desperate!

(a/n: OMG I am 100% flattered that you think I’m one of the greats I literally feel like im in such a small corner of the fanbase bc im such a dweeb but that makes me cry happy tears THANK U. also yes i know i’ve already had a roger imagine w battleSHIPS in it but.... this is battleSHOTS bitch. NOW BACK TO UR REGULAR SCHEDULED BEN SMUT yall got spoiled w the fluff from the last post)

(p.s. u can still venmo/cash app me if u want im a broke college student pls spare change ma’am)

“Battleshots? You Americans are fucking mental, I swear.”

Ben was seated across the table from you, cross-legged on the chair that was currently actually a bit too warm for comfort. Both of you were out on his balcony, sitting at a table that was lit only by the late evening sun and the light streaming out of the door that led into his house.

You’d fashioned two makeshift Battleshots boards out of two small pizza boxes, seeing as you’d ordered pizza in tonight and the boxes had reminded you of your favorite party game. There was a grid on the bottom and top, and you each had 9 shot glasses filled with different liquors placed on the board in formations of 4, 3, and 2, just like the game of Battleships.

“It’s fun, don’t knock it til you try it,” you warned, peeking over the top of the box that was propped up on a cup and smiling. Ben’s curious green eyes met yours, and he laughed as he saw you stick your tongue out at him. “Winner finishes shots, or loser finishes winner’s shots? Your choice.”

“I say winner doesn’t have to finish their shots, that’s only fair.” He then sat back in his chair and pursed his lips, thinking for a moment. “I don’t want loser to finish the winner’s shots either, because I don’t think you can handle more than 9 shots.”

“Oh? Someone’s got a big head, don’t they?” you teased, raising an eyebrow and rolling your eyes playfully as he shrugged, smiling smugly.

“I have confidence in my abilities.” An exaggerated groan left your mouth as you flipped him off, trying not to laugh at how cocky he was being. “In all aspects of life,” he added with an eyebrow wiggle, making you pretend to gag as you waved your hand dismissively at him.

“I don’t want to hear about your sex life right now, Ben.”

“Why not? You seemed to enjoy my sex life a lot a couple nights ago.” A blush crept across your cheeks as you grabbed the decorative pillow you’d bought for him that was resting on the chair next to you, throwing it at him as he tried to imitate your moans.

He caught the pillow, laughing, and put it right back where it belonged as he gave you a knowing look. “You’re a pervert,” you mumbled, sitting up in your chair and grabbing your marker as you moved your cup of orange juice closer – you were using it as a chaser, while Ben opted for some kind of soda you hadn’t paid attention to.

You began the game of Battleshots, neck and neck with Ben throughout the first part until you both only had three shots left. You weren’t feeling anything yet, probably having taken the shots too close together, but you knew it would hit you soon. Standing up was something you were starting to fear.

But then Ben knocked out your last three in three successive rounds while you missed the rest of his, and you accepted defeat with only mild complaining as Ben cheered loudly, ever the gracious winner.

“I’ll take my winnings in cash or check, whichever works,” he teased, making you groan and climb up off your chair. Yep. There it was. You felt a warmth spread throughout your body and a dizziness overtake you as you stood, and you had to grab onto the chair next to you to ground yourself for a moment.

“Oof…. I’ve never lost this game,” you admitted sheepishly, Ben’s chuckles turning into cackles of laughter as he went to open the door for you, watching you make your way inside as best as you could. He was feeling something, but by no means was he as tipsy as you – if anything, he just felt a slight buzz, while you were verging on actually being drunk if you drank anything else.

Ben followed you as you headed to the kitchen to get yourself a water, and you glared at him as he continued to tease you, obviously in a great mood from winning. “Do you need help getting the water open? You’re a right mess, Ms. Second Place.”

“Oh, shut up,” you grumbled, taking a drink of the water and flipping him off as you leaned back against the counter.

He only laughed, unfazed by your grumpiness as he came over to place his hands on either side of you, effectively trapping you. “Does the winner get a kiss, at least?” He puckered his lips, closing his eyes and waiting for you to close the gap between you two. Scowling, you did the first thing you could think of – pouring some of your water onto his mussy, slightly curly blonde hair. The look of shock on his face was worth it all as he pulled away, gasping and pushing your hand away. “You little-“

“Cry about it,” you interrupted as you sat the water down, shrugging before taking off in a stumbling run and laughing deliriously as he scrambled after you, nearly slipping completely on the puddle of water that had gathered on the kitchen floor.

You made it all the way to the hallway upstairs before Ben caught you – he’d taken the steps two at a time, damn his thighs and stamina – and he grabbed you by the waist, lifting you up into a vice-like grip as you shrieked with drunken laughter, fighting against his arms even though it was clearly pointless.

“You’re gonna get it now!” he laughed breathlessly, carrying you into his bedroom and tossing you down on the bed before pouncing on you immediately, his hands going to your sides to tickle you mercilessly. He wouldn’t stop until you were gasping for air, begging him to give you a break, and even then, he kept his hand resting on your tummy as he fell to the side, grinning over at you. “You look like a mess, love.”

Giggling softly at the amused look on his face, you shook your head before crawling on top of him, straddling his torso before sitting down on his abdomen carefully, only eliciting a small release of air from him before he shifted just slightly to make it more comfortable. “You’re quite a dickhead, making fun of a drunk girl like this.”

His eye roll only made you laugh again, and he grabbed your hips, carefully scooting back so he could sit up and support himself on his elbows. “I feel no remorse, hard to feel bad when I get a pretty girl on my lap because of it.”

Your cheeks turned an even rosier color than the alcohol had already made them as you grinned, shaking your head before leaning down to kiss him gently, mumbling against his lips between kisses. “You’re such a flirt too.”

“Also no regret,” he quipped back calmly, resting a hand on the back of your neck and locking you into the kiss as he laid back on the bed again, taking you with him. Deepening the kiss eagerly, you made a happy noise as you felt the world spinning, half from the liquor and half from the feeling of Ben’s hands sliding up the back of your thighs to come and rest on your ass. When you pressed your ass back into his hands eagerly, he chuckled softly into the kiss, pulling away for a moment to mumble, “Someone’s excited.”

“Shut up, I’m drunk and my boyfriend is hot,” you mumbled right back, grinning before pulling him into an open-mouthed kiss, eliciting a groan from the back of his throat when you swirled your tongue around his, both of you tasting like tequila, while you left him with the taste of orange juice. The sound only made you more desperate to eliminate the layers of clothes between you, so you began tugging at the hem of his sweater, lifting it upwards and off when he reluctantly separated from the kiss and let you sit up.

He did the same with your shirt, tugging it up and off along with your bra before gazing up at you with a desirous glint in his eyes. The blown-out pupils scanned slowly up your torso as Ben chewed on his lower lip, just taking it all in. Shivering at the way his eyes devoured you, you had to finally distract him so he’d remember what he was doing – you circled your hips, grinding down against his increasingly hardening cock, which made his hands fly to your hips and catch them. You came to a stop with an impish grin on your face, and the playful look of disapproval in his face was quickly replaced by another look of lust when he rolled the two of you over, starting to work at the drawstring of the shorts you had on.

“Naughty girl,” he murmured, finally getting your shorts untied before tugging them off with your panties. His hand immediately moved between your legs, two fingers sliding up your folds as he grinned mischievously down at you as you squirmed slightly at the feeling, wanting his fingers inside of you. “You look so pretty right now, baby.”

“Ben, please,” you begged quietly, lifting your hips up against his touch and almost whining as he pulled his hand away, raising an eyebrow.

“Louder?”

“Damn it, Ben, please!” you repeated, pouting when he chuckled at the neediness in your voice. But his fingers returned to your pussy, rubbing your clit achingly slow and replacing the pouting look on your face with a look of relief. Eyelids fluttering closed, you let out a sigh of pure bliss as you relaxed into his touch, and you let out a soft moan of his name as he slid his middle finger into you, pumping it slowly.

As Ben finger-fucked you almost lazily slow, he pulled your legs over his shoulders one by one, laying stomach-down on the bed and trailing wet, open-mouthed love bites along the inside of your thighs. Then, the feeling of his mouth latching onto your clit made you moan out in surprise, and you ran a hand back through his damp blonde hair and giggled drunkenly as you remembered the water you’d left on the counter. “Fucking water,” you mumbled to yourself, pressing a hand to your forehead and laughing at how feverish you felt from the alcohol.

“Not funny,” he mumbled as he pressed another kiss to the inside of your thigh, and you were prevented from making a smartass remark by the simultaneous addition of another finger to your pussy and Ben’s tongue pressing against your clit, then flicking against it rapidly.

“Ohmygod, nevermind, you’re so right,” you breathed out, and you could hear Ben snicker to himself before he attached his lips to your clit again, sucking hard and eliciting an embarrassingly whorish moan from you. “Fuck you,” you mumbled once you’d stopped seeing stars for the moment, Ben’s fingers curling up inside of you and making you whimper softly in pleasure.

“That’s the plan.” His comebacks were rapid-fire today, and you thanked everything holy that you’d been blessed with such a keeper as he moved his lips up to your tummy, trailing kisses all the way up to your breasts. He used a third finger to slowly stretch you out as he began to suck on the skin of one of your breasts, purposefully trying to leave a hickey as small moans and whines left your lips.

You were unable to control your vocalizations as his fingers thrust in and out of you, and you did whine needily as he retracted them, leaving you feeling empty again. But he was already off the bed, grabbing a condom from the nightstand as you sat up shakily on your elbows, glancing at his jeans and biting your lip. You’d barely helped him out at all, you were so drunkenly focused on your own pleasure. “Do you need me to-“

“Nope,” he replied, popping the p as he unbuttoned his jeans, pushing them down along with his boxers and kicking them off as he revealed he was already completely hard. You raised an eyebrow as he crawled back between your legs, backing you up to the pillows and rolling the latex onto his cock. “Hate to admit it, but those little sounds you make when I eat you out? Drive me fucking bonkers, honestly.”

A wide grin crossed over your face, and he rolled his eyes playfully as he took you by your sides, flipping you over so you were facedown against the mattress. As you raised your hips a bit, Ben met you in the middle, sliding his condom-covered cock between your folds and biting his lip. “Aw, not gonna let me see you fuck me?” you whined, Ben groaning as he shook his head, lining himself up.

“God, no,” he muttered, sliding into you and making you moan out lowly as he filled you, digging his stocky, strong fingers into your hips to hold you still when he almost bottomed out. “Can’t stand seeing you that smug right now,” he teased, making you laugh weakly as you tried to focus on his voice, not the fact that he was nearly balls deep in you.

“What? You get to be smug when you win, but I-“

Ben didn’t give you the chance to finish as he pulled out, then snapped his hips back forwards again. That effectively shut you up, instead making you bury your face in a pillow so the entire world wouldn’t hear you moan loudly at the sudden sensation. “You’re such an ass,” you panted when you finally regained your senses, and Ben chuckled knowingly as he began to thrust again, your eyes fluttering shut.

“I know,” he replied quietly, his thrusts shaking his gravelly voice as he moved a hand to your hair, pulling it all into his hand as he fucked into you. The only thing keeping you on balance and stopping the room from spinning was the tight grip you had on the comforter, which was the only grounding presence at the moment besides Ben’s increasingly tight grip on your hair.

The room was filled with the sound of skin on skin and wanton moans as Ben took you from behind, your legs nearly failing to keep you up several times when his thrusts sped up or slowed down. When he sped up, he’d let out little curses and grunts in that deep tone of his as he pounded into you, but when he’d slow down, his deliberate, angled thrusts would nearly overwhelm your senses.

When a particularly deep thrust made you moan out his name loudly, an undying smirk graced Ben’s lips as he continued to bottom out in you, pleased with the way he was turning you into a moaning mess and also dangerously close to becoming a moaning mess himself. As he neared his orgasm, he’d started to push your face more and more into the mattress, your cheek forced into the soft expanse of the comforter as his thrusts got sloppier and more desperate.

“I fucking love you,” he mumbled out at one point, and you grinned before letting out something that was a mixture of a laugh and a moan, pressing your hips back to meet his thrusts eagerly.

“I love you too, Ben,” you replied as sweetly as you could muster – which was hard, considering the situation – and he rewarded you by reaching around you with his free hand to rub your clit, making you whimper and whine in pleasure. You were already teetering on the edge, and this was making it almost impossible to hold out any longer. “Shit, I’m close, babe.”

“Me too, fuckin’ hell,” he breathed out, speeding up his thrusts as much as he could and matching the pace with his hand. He let go of your hair, instead moving that hand back to your hip and squeezing it encouragingly. “Come for me, babygirl.”

“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” you cried out as the dual stimulation became too much, and you felt your high take over as every nerve-ending in your body simultaneously felt like it was shocked with a high-voltage energy.

Ben bit his slightly swollen lip, trying to stave off his orgasm as long as he could, but the feeling of you clenching around him mixed with the sound of your breathy, high-pitched moans was too much, and he had to move his other hand to your hips to hold you to him as his hips stuttered. Buried inside of you, he released into his condom while groaning your name brokenly, digging his fingers into your hips. Halfway through, he pulled out, giving his cock a few quick pumps with his hand to finish himself off.

You were down off your high first, Ben close behind, and you could barely walk without wobbling as you climbed off the bed, making your way to the master bath and grabbing wet washcloths – one for him, one for you. You cleaned yourself up, then returned to the bedroom, slightly more sure that you weren’t going to fall over on the way back, and you tossed the washcloth to him. He’d already disposed of the condom, and he gladly accepted the towel before cleaning himself up, then pulling on his boxers.

You tugged his sweater and your panties on, crawling into bed and curling into his side as he joined you, pulling the covers over the both of you. You were still reasonably tipsy, and you giggled as he pressed a kiss to your forehead, having already caught his breath.

“God, your stamina,” you mumbled, pressing a kiss to his shoulder and shaking your head before nuzzling his neck, moving to lay halfway on top of him.

“As I said earlier,” he reminded you, wrapping his muscled arms around your waist and resting one of his hands on your ass, giving it a gentle pinch. “Confidence in my abilities. You should give it a try.”

“I should have confidence in your abilities?” you joked, only slurring your speech a bit, and Ben chucked before giving your hip a light pat as he shook his head.

“Well, that’s not what I meant. But that too.”

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peaky-shelby · 5 years

Text

When he sees me [4]

Pairing: Chris Evans x oc

Summary: Delilah is a simple shy girl. What will happen when famous actor, Chris Evans sees her? Will she hide, will she run again? Will he make her come out of hiding instead?

Episode 4: The one with the double date

Read: prologue, episode 1, episode 2 , episode 3

Words: 2.656

Based on When he sees me by Sara Bereilles

Warnings: mentions of sex, awkwardness, fluff, mentions of anxiety and Sebastian Stan.

Author’s note: this one is practically the begging of the story. The beginning of the battle that Delilah will have to go through. Will they survive? Thanks again for reading and please don’t forget leave your thoughts💘 and if you stop answering I’ll just assume that you want me to stop tagging you♥️

On the drive from the club to the house Delilah didn’t shut up. She kept mumbling about all these reasons why the double date was not a good idea. A part of her knew that Laura wasn’t really listening but she kept going. You see, she talks a lot when she has something to say.

”how could you think of something like that?„ Delilah shut the door to their apartment and threw her back on the nearest chair, her entire body was shaking, her mind was a maze, she had so many things to say, so many worries to express and she couldn’t get them together. She kept pacing back and forth like she was trying to find her sense around the room.

“Would you calm down? I think It’s the perfect idea and everything will go alright—„

“You thought ‘stole his car’ was a metaphor for sleeping with him! Excuse me but I don’t trust your judgment. How am I supposed to go on a double date? I don’t even go on alone dates—„

“This is exactly why I suggested it, you needed a date—„

“I didn’t Laura! That’s my point! I’m happy! Maybe I haven’t dated in a while but that doesn’t mean I’m sad! I don’t need a date, i need to be calm and right now I’m not calm!„

“For God’s Shake Chris Evans asked you out—„

“No!„ She paused her pace and pointed at Laura “It was your idea! He’s just too kind to say anything! You forced him in to asking me out and now it’s going to be a disaster—„

Laura rolled her eyes and went to the kitchen to make herself some tea. She had witnessed these kind of meltdowns many times, soon it would be over. “Or maybe it will be a really fun night!„

“Well we’ll never know cuz I’m not going!„ Delilah left the living room and went to her bedroom, she sat on her bed, trying to keep her body still but her leg kept trembling against the ground. She heard Laura’s sigh from the kitchen and she could imagine her rolling her eyes again. After her 4th meltdown, Laura stopped getting worried, instead she’d use her wit and sarcasm to help, it was more efficient.

“If you keep hitting your foot against the floor, Ms. Reynolds will come shouting again.„ she said entering the room with two cups of tea. Delilah lifted her feet and sat with her legs crossed on her bed. Then Laura handed her one of the cups and sat next to her.

“This is madness! I can’t even go out with the cat guy across the hall and I’m supposed to go on date with Chris Evans? What am I even going to say?„

“Pff that’s obvious!„

“Is it?„

“If you went out with America’s president you’d talk about politics, so considering you’re going out with America’s ass you can talk about butts„ Laura sipped her tea, looking at Delilah cheekily.

“Here im having a serious problems which you created and you’re making jokes—„

“Oh D, come on, what’s your serious problem?! That You have a date with America’s Ass?„

“Stop calling him that!„

“You’re being a child! I get it you’re worried but you have nothing to lose! No matter the out come we are going out with Sebastian Stan and Chris Evans and you’re sitting here whining about what may or may not happen instead of spending your time trying to find the right dress! Literally a child!„

Delilah didn’t respond. She looked down at her cup, saw her reflection in the tea. It was a blur, exactly how she felt on the inside, a blur. Laura wasn’t wrong, she knew that but she couldn’t just ignore the anxiety that she was feeling about the coming night. Her thoughts came to a pause when Laura placed her hand on her shoulder “I’ll be with you, watching everything, if it gets really bad, I’ll drag you out of there myself but don’t let that noise in your head take away this amazing chance. It’s just noise Delilah, just noise. But he is real and right now he is worrying about you the same way you are worrying about him, if he wanted to say no, he would have said no.„ she smiled, pushed Delilah on shoulder gently to make her look up. “But he didn’t.„

Delilah raised her head, her eyes connecting with her friend’s. Laura was her safety net, the one person in the world her head made no noise about. She was always sure about their friendship, they were a family, chasing dreams in LA. Somehow Laura would always find a way to convince her into doing things, she usually wouldn’t. Maybe that was because she knew deep down that even if things went completely sideways, Laura would be there to catch her. Even if she was the one that pushed her off the cliff in the first place.

“I have been on a date in so long I’ve forgotten how to do it.„

Laura laughed “hun, that’s exactly why I’m here! I got experience on that area.„

“Right yeah.. last night, I think you got a little more experience in that area.„

Laura giggled and nodded “yeah I think I did!„

“How did that happen?„ asked Delilah.

“I don’t know... it wasn’t supposed to happen. I had met him ones or twice before in different events, we kept in touch and last night we got a little tipsy and you know.. things just happened.„

“So you like him?„

“Yeah, Yeah I do and I don’t think it’s just fun and games.. he’s a nice one D. I got a good feeling about it.„

“Well I guess we’ll find out tonight.„ Delilah smiled.

They spent the rest of their time, arguing about what they were going to wear. Laura wanted to go with a sexy kind of style, whilst Delilah wanted to keep it simple. At one point they even had a clothes war, Dresses, pants and shirts were thrown all over the house. In the end Laura wore a white top with a portrait neck and a short black flower skirt. Delilah wore a blue dress with flutter sleeves.

As planned Chris and Sebastian were under their house at 8. Delilah saw them arriving in Chris’ car from the window and she instantly panicked.

“I don’t wanna go!„ she whined. Laura ignored her cries and held her arm, pulling her with her out of their apartment.

“There’s my girl!„ Sebastian walked over to Laura immediately “I’ve been waiting to kiss these lips all day.„ he said, leaning down and acting on his wish. Delilah laughed as she watched them, she kinda wanted that but she was too scared to ask for it.

“Hey.„ his voice was like a summer evening breeze. It awoke her from her meaningless thoughts in such a calming way. His tall presence behind her, warmed her entire body even tho he wasn’t touching her. Slowly she turned and looked at him, her cheeks slightly blushing under his watch.

“Hi.„

“You look really pretty.„ he said. This is a good start, she thought and smiled.

“Thank you, you too.„

At that moment ditching Laura and Sebastian and staying alone with Chris didn’t seem such a bad idea but—

“Alright! Let’s go! Come on, I’m hungry!„ said Sebastian.

Chris was driving, Delilah was shotgun and Sebastian and Laura were in the back. They couldn’t keep their hands to each other for the whole drive.

“Goodness if they keep going like that they’ll eat each other.„ whispered Delilah, hoping only Chris would hear.

“Sebastian did say he was hungry.„

“Ewww!„ She exclaimed in a high pitched voice making Chris laugh at her reaction.

“Try not to make babies in the restaurant!„ advised Chris, when they arrived at the restaurant. They all followed him in, Delilah was right behind him, hidden by his tall body and the other two were only a few steps behind. The waiter showed them to their table, Laura made sure that they’d sit in the right way for Delilah to be next to Chris.

During the night he’d noticed the little things, how her laughter differed when she actually found something funny from when she was just been kind. How excited she’d get to talk about her favorite books and theater and how she’d let her mind wonder from time to time in thoughts only she could hear. And In that moment while she was talking with Sebastian and Laura about books, he caught himself staring at her . She looked like the ocean in her blue dress, natural and yet ethereal. He could only see the right side of her face, a strand of her was covering her rosy cheek so in a very gentle movement he stretched his hand and moved her hair behind her ear. She looked at him as soon as she felt his warm hand against her skin. Chris pulled his hand back quickly, idiot— that was so weird why would you do that?

“Sebastian don’t we have this thing to go to?„ Said Laura unexpectedly.

“What thing?„

That question got him a punch in the shoulder.

“Oh the thiiiiing— Yeah we should go to the thing.„

“you don’t have a car„ Delilah tried to stop her friend from leaving.

“We’ll get an Uber!„ answered Sebastian

“You should know every nice love story starts with an Uber—„ Laura was cut off by Delilah’s murderous look. “Lets go before she kills me!„

Sebastian left money on the table for Chris and left with Laura. Chris and Delilah didn’t say anything for a couple of minutes, it’s like they had forgotten how two humans communicate.

“What do you think the thing is?„ asked Chris, trying to make a conversation. Obviously there is no thing, She probably thinks I’m an idiot.

“Obviously there is no thing. I mean there’s his thing which she’ll be getting—„ Delilah’s cheeks blushed immediately after she said the joke and she let her head drop on the table, feeling like a total idiot. “God I’m so sorry— that was really inappropriate I had too much whine—„

Chris laughed, she’s adorable.

“It’s alright— you’re probably right.„

She giggled at his reassurance, he tapped her on the shoulder so she’d look at him and smirked “wanna get out of here too?„

“Honestly? Yeah.„

“Lets go I have an idea.„

“Goodness this is so cheesy“ she whispered getting out of the car. Chris chuckled at her comment.

“I’m sorry it’s the best I could come up with last minute.„

“Well I’m not complaining, I’m just saying—„

“It’s cheesy.„ he completed her sentence, making her laugh a little.

Living in a LA for the last 3 years this was actually the first time she had gone on Mount Lee at night. The view was beautiful, the lights of the street looked like diamonds, the world looked so peaceful from up here, like a painted picture.

“You always see the Hollywood sign from down there... it’s so weird to be up here looking down there.„ she smiled, tilting her head to look at him “it’s cheesy but it’s beautiful.„

Chris looked down at her with so much affection. Night has never looked so beautiful on a person, it was like it was tailored for her to wear it.

“You know... when you are in Hollywood, so deep in the fuss of it, the fame and the craziness you forget how beautiful it is as a place. The history, the magic, the secrets, the art...everything about it. So I like to come up here, enjoy the view and remember.... and I feel so privileged to be able to say that I’m part of it, not because of the fame or the money but the—„

“History.„ she finished his sentence like he had done earlier “..and the beauty.„ she added in a whisper making him smile. He took a step forward and turned his whole body to her.

This is the perfect moment, right? She wants me to kiss her. I’ll just do it, but I’ll go in slow in case she wants to stop me— please don’t stop me. I bet her lips taste like caramel. Only a few inches closer, just a little bit—

Delilah stopped him by placing her hand on his chest. Chris looked at her worried but she wasn’t even looking at him, she was watching something behind him.

“I think there are two people doing it behind the bush.„ she whispered, trying not to laugh. Chris immediately turned and sure enough there were two people behind the bush totally getting it. He tried his hardest to contain his laughter but Delilah gave up and broke down in chuckles.

“Let’s get out of here!„ he suggested and pulled her with him to the car. When they got in they both started laughing like kids and Chris drove away quickly. And when they were in a fair distance he asked her if she wanted to go home and Delilah said yes.

“This is it.„ she whispered when they arrived. Chris smiled at her, he wanted her to stay.

“We should do something again.„

“I’d really like that.„ she whispered and leaned in to gave him a gentle peck on the cheek. His beard stroked her face, making her heart flutter. Their connection was so tender and sweet. She pulled away and gave him one last smile before she exited the car. Chris watched her leave until last minute he remembered:

“Oh god the bracelet!„ he got off the car and run to her. “Sorry! I almost forgot!„

“What happened?„

“You lost this, again.„ he pulled the bracelet out of his pocket and placed it on her hands. “Next time I’ll find it, I’ll keep it!„ he added. Delilah laughed and nodded.

“I’ll be more careful I promise. Thank you Chris!„

They stood still for a moment. Chris was only looking at her not saying anything. “There’s one more thing..„ he started saying.

Do it. Kiss her. If it wasn’t for the pervs making out in the bushes, she would have kissed you. Kiss her.

He stepped closer and curled her hair behind her ear, Delilah watched his movements carefully, her heart was about to drop out of her chest but she wasn’t going to stop him.

He leaned closer and closer and closer until there was no space between them and his lips met hers. It was quick and sweet, only a little peck on her lips and nothing more but Delilah was still feeling like he stole her voice and her breath. She opened her eyes and found him looking at her with his golden eyes like he was asking for permission to kiss her again. She gave it to him with a simple smile and Chris moved closer to her, kissing her one more time. His right hand was placed gently on her cheek while she had very awkwardly placed her hand on his hips, holding on his jacket. She had forgotten how to do this, it was like it was her first time. Chris sensed her struggle and pulled away, giving her a reassuring smile. Delilah giggled in embarrassment and looked away. “I’m sorry..I— I’m not used to this. I..should really go.„ her anxiety was very slowly but surely raising from her toes up to her head and she knew that soon the noise would start playing in her mind. She had to leave before he could hear it. The giggles stopped and she stepped away from him. He nodded and waved “goodnight..I’ll call you„ he smiled.

“Goodnight Chris.„

She walked in the building and fast in her apartment. Shutting the door and as soon as she did that the noise began.

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