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lunaekalenda · 3 years

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So this is an angst request about Erwin! To basically lay it out Erwin and reader are childhood friends and she has always been pretty attached to him, as they grow up he goes into the survey corps and she goes with him as well, and she eventually develops a crush on him and he does too just that he keeps it private to himself.

okay! i hope you like it and sorry for the waiting!! 💖

continuation to the request:

Over time they start falling apart. Either way during an expedition the reader ends up passing away and since then one of the reader's best friends has been passive aggressive with Erwin even when he became commander. So the night before the retaking of Wall Maria he calls that friend into his office and he asks them why they have been acting that way ever since she died. The friend confesses that the reader loved him so much that she didnt care what happened to them and that. The friend confesses that the reader loved him so much that she didnt care what happened to them and that she didn’t care when he fell into the arms of any other woman because she just wanted him to be happy. And that's why the friend was always so mad at Erwin because he never even spared a glance at her. So then Erwin dies and he meets her again and it can end on either fluff or angst if you want to. You can do it in any POV you can! Thanks!

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❁ erwin x female!reader

❁ spoilers! some cursing also, one mention of suicide word, original character introduction, non-canon events and deaths.

❁ a/n: sorry, anon! it took longer than I expected to write this because i kept editing it :’) i hope you like it <3 sorry for any errors and for making this so long :’’) also, i’m not following the manga exact events!!!! also sorry if i messed something up :(

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“You’re what?”

“I’m joining the Survey Corps.” Erwin looked at you, his blue eyes fixed on yours. He left the papers on the desk, getting up. Even knowing he’s just a teenager, he’s pretty tall. But, after all this years, it doesn’t intimidate you.

“You’re not” He says. You raise an eyebrow, looking at him.

“You’re not my father to decide what can I do and what I cannot do. If you’re joining, I’m joining.” Erwin sighs and looks at you fiercely. You keep your gaze in his.

“I have the same possibilities to die as you have, Smith. So don’t fucking dare to tell me not to join.”

Both of you passed the tests to enter the Survey Corps. His intelligence and your strength made the two of you stand out. You cared for Erwin, always checking on him on your training expeditions, and being there when he rans out of gas or needs assistance. Even when he tried to convince you not to, you joined anyway the elimination squad. Erwin joined as well, but his strategic brain made him talk to the heads of the army. Lion waited for you after an intense training. Erwin was entering the Commander’s office. Lion sighed.

“He’s always so occupied with high class men...”

“I’m happy for him.” you say. Lion was cleaning his boots.

He has been your friend since both of you entered the elimination squad, and he’s like a big brother to you now. He rolls his eyes.

“Because you love him.” He says. He was not wrong: A little teen crush on Erwin evolved to the point that you love him. You know he doesn’t feel the same for you, or so you think. He always treats you kind of cold, and more since he entered the Corps. You know he feels responsible of you joining because of his ideas, but you where totally free to join. That doesn’t excuse his new cold attitude towards you. Lion sighs again and gets up, his boots now totally clean.

“He doesn’t look at you that way, y/n” He says. Maybe he’s right, totally right, but the heart doesn’t choose who to love. That’s why you’re deeply in love with him. And because you know him better than anyone. His fears and his goals. The way his blue eyes soften when he talks about something he loves. "But, I do understand you." he says. "Love is just a fucking problem and a headache if it is one-sided" He palmed your shoulder before going out of the tent. Sighing, you stand up and follow him. Erwin comes out of the Commander’s tent at the same time. You look at him and he looks at you. You smile at him, a little smile that he is silently adoring, silently wanting to kiss, to feel it against him.

"Come on, Erwin." The Commander makes Erwin walk behind him, and his expression keeps being the same as usual towards you. You decide it's time to stop making him notice you. He doesn't want anything romantic with you, so just let him be. If he wants to search a cute soldier to get married or a girl to have fun is his decision. You're out of it.

But you didn't know how much he cared for you, how deep in love he was. Just watching the corners of your lips making a little smile makes his heart beat faster, the way you are so close to him even when he is treating you like that hurts him. If he wasn't a soldier, he would ask you to go out with him. He would take your hands sweetly and make you dance to an invented song just to see the way your lips curve in a smile of joy. He would take you to long walks and give you his jacket when you're cold. He would ask your hand in marriage and kiss and nude your body with care and tenderness. He would marry you happily, have maybe a couple kids, if you want to. Live a easy and quiet life.

But he decided to be a soldier.

That means he's risking his life every time he puts his feet out of the walls. As you do. That's why he wants you to leave and search someone who cares for you and loves you deeply. He wants to be that one, but knowing that maybe he'll die in the next expedition, leaving you alone and heartbroken, scares him. He knows you're brave and strong, but a close loose is not a easy thing. Even for you. So he decided to keep a cold attitude towards you.

Years passed by and your crush for him was still there, as intense as always. He is candidate to be the next Commander, as he always wanted to. His desire for knowing why humanity has to be in the walls while the titans can be free out there. Lion knocks on your room door.

"Did you heard the news?" he asks, entering. You shake your head. "We'll go on an emergency expedition tomorrow." Lion sits near you. An emergency expedition. There was a rare type of expedition, the emergency ones: they're made when a strange titan comes around and takes a lot of normal titans with it, near a town or village. "We're leaving tonight at 5. Be ready." You nod. "And try to sleep a bit, yes?" you nod again. Lion leaves silently and you prepare yourself to sleep some hours. You know that going without sleeping will make you an easy prey for titans. At five o'clock, you're all marching towards the entrance of the wall Maria. The Commander assigns your squad to the front.

The expedition starts calmly, even when the atmosphere in the soldier’s files seems tense. Lion rides a horse near you, in silence, and you know Erwin goes behind, with all the high soldiers. You can’t feel titans near, even their steps. That’s why the Commander yell scares you.

“There’s a sparkler!” he yells. You look at both sides, finding easily the black colored flame. “Elimination squad, go and find that damn thing and kill it. Rescue squad, find survivors and take them to the barricade.” You nod, following your squad leader. After a long time riding, without finding signs of a titan near, you start to think that maybe it was just a bad joke of one of the juniors.

That changes when the girl next to you yells, suddenly trapped in a big hand. A strange titan, with an enormous mouth, smiles at her, as if it were trying to tell her that it is going to enjoy every bite of her body. And it does. You saw comrades die because of titans. Smashed, eaten in a bite or even suicides. But you never, never, saw a titan split a comrade in two parts. Her waist bleeds while the titan swallows her legs. The scene is truly gross, how the blood stains the mouth of the titan, dripping to the ground, making the daisies turn red in a cruel metaphor of life and death.

“Eva...” Lion whispers. All the color has left his face. You’re incapable to look to other side, just to the horror expression in Eva’s face, freezed forever while the titan eats her. Then, it’s gaze searches new victims. That’s how you react, when its bloody smile is pointing on your direction. Lion yells.

“y/n!”

Your ODMG goes fast and reaches a near tree, where you hang. The titan looks around. You have it’s neck really close to you. It’s just having it distracted and attack him.

“Lion, distract him!” You yell, hiding behind the trunk. Lion starts to move on the ground, the big eyes of the titan following him fast, his hand trying to reach the fastest soldier of the army. You point with your ODMG to its neck, the perfect angle for attacking it. Once your hooks are well placed, you take two blades and jump.

The attack is one the trainer show you. It’s almos infalible, it has a 0′1 margin of error. It’s impossible to fail. You speed up, trying to reach its neck. But you found its teeth before.

Your expression is surprised when the titan opens its mouth, taking you into it. Your blades made cuts in its mouth because of the speed.

“y/n!” Lion yells, taking out his blades. He goes fast in your help, but maybe it is too late. You feel how the titans’ teeth part you in two, as you saw it did with Eva before. It is instant pain. How you body gets split in two. How the titan parts from your body, to pull the part it has between its teeth far from the other part of your body, using two fingers to hold your upper part. You’re still conscious about what is happening. You can see other titans fighting against your comrades. You can watch them die, as same as you’re about to do. There’s no way to save you.

This is not a romantic book. Erwin is not going to appear in his white horse, just in time to save you. He’s not going to leave the army to take care of you. He’s not going to kill that titan in revenge, yelling and covered in blood. So, that’s why you close your eyes, leaving your body, without making resistance against the titan.

When Lion killed it, it was late for you. Lion tried to wake you up, to make you open your eyes and look at him. But you couldn’t. Your soul was watching him from above.

The news reached your home and Erwin. He went to your house, to show respect and give the sorry to your family.

It hurt him in ways he couldn’t imagine he would get hurt. It was a continuous reminder in his heart, that now you’re not going to smile at him in the corridors or be behind him when he needs you. He cried. He cried a lot, in private, in his room. He regretted every single cold gaze, every time he ignored you thinking it was the best for you. He regrets all the times you reached him to talk with him, and he ignored you to talk with high ranked soldiers. He regrets not confessing to you.

And now he can’t do anything about it because you’re not longer there.

Lion feels guilty, he thinks he could have saved you, but you jumped on the titan’s mouth. It wasn’t his fault. Erwin knows he was your best friend there, and he knows he should go and show his respects to him too, but he can’t. Not now. He decides to wait. The wound is too recent.

That’s how years passed by, slow, and Erwin got upgraded to Commander. He got new soldiers, new squads and new faces. But he stills think about you. About how you would like to meet Hange. How Lion is training the new ones. How well you’ll understand Levi.

He decided that it was time to talk with Lion. Breathing deep, he started to walk towards the barricade. There, Lion was making a ponytail to a young girl, that seemed like a cadet. The girl made the army’s salute towards her Commander, salute that Erwin made back. Lion looked at him, his face tinted with anger, like every time the Commander walked near him. Erwin knows he feels bad because of what happened to you but, angry at him? Why?

“Can we talk in my office?” the blonde man asks. Lion keeps looking at him with anger.

“Why would the Commander need me?”

“Just a couple of minutes, and then you can go back to work.”

Lion reluctantly agrees, following the Commander back to his office. Once they’re in, Erwin starts to talk.

“I know y/n’s death has...”

“Oh, so now you’re going to talk about her.” Lion says. His arms are crossed.

“What do you mean?” Erwin asks. Lion walks toward him. The two of them are similar in height, but Lion is more corpulent.

“You never talked to her when she was alive. Even knowing that she was there for you every fucking time you needed her. She wasn’t your fucking dog, Commander.” the way Lion spits the word makes Erwin realize that he isn’t his favorite soldier. “She was a girl. A girl with feelings, a girl that loved and suffered. A human. Not your war machine, not your gas station, not your shield. A girl.”

Erwin wasn’t getting where was Lion trying to reach with that conversation.

“What do you mean?” he asks, quietly. Lion let out a little sarcastic laugh.

“She was in love with you, Commander Smith. She told me a hundred times that it didn’t care if you were watching another woman because that means you’re happy.” Erwin’s blue eyes shot open in surprise. “She was in love with you. That’s why she was always around you, helping you and caring for you. It wasn’t luck. It was love.”

Erwin got dizzy. That’s why you were always so sweet to him? Always trying to get closer to him, to make sure he was secure, to make him notice you.

How was he so blind?

“I...” Erwin was at a loss of words. Lion sighed.

“I don’t know why you were so cold to her. Why? She was the sweetest girl out there and you treated her with coldness.”

He asks himself the same. Why? To protect you or to protect himself? Was he trying to make you happy or trying to extinguish the love he felt for you? Was it for your good-being or for his?

Was he being egoistic or abnegated?

Lion left the office without looking again to Erwin.

That night, Erwin’s mind was a mess. He only could think about you. About how you cared all this time for him and how he couldn’t save you. But he had an expedition the next day. Even when he wanted to cry and break things and scream, he needs to sleep. He’s human, after all.

He dreamed about you. About how your smile was always for him, and he couldn’t see it. That’s why there are purple marks under his eyes. Levi looks at his Commander, saying anything. Just his normal silence when he looked to the front again. Erwin survived to a lot of battles, a lot, even when one of them costed his arm. But he survived. Even when he wanted to die, because you’re not longer with him. But he obligated himself to keep going.

“Today, we’re fighting to recover a part of Wall Maria, to recover the district of Shiganshina from the titans. Soldiers, offer your hearts!” all the soldiers yelled back to Erwin. He looked at the sky.

Some hours after, the Commander told all his effectives to offer themselves along with him. He knew it was difficult to win towards the beast titan, the one that throws rocks. He talked to Levi earlier, and the Captain asked him if he had a plan. Levi was sure everybody was about to die. But the Commander told Levi that, risking his life and his cadets lives, there was hope for humanity. That’s why Erwin was looking at the distance without fear, the silhouette of the Beast Titan could be seen from where he is. Yelling to his subordinates once again, he made the army advance. And a lot of stones appeared in front of them. He thought about you, about how you where always brave, even when things were complicated.

That was the last thought he had, before getting hit by a rock.

Erwin didn’t expect to find you again, pretty as always, with your beautiful hair clean and shining. He was there, in front of you. You were also wearing the Corps uniform. His eyes started to form tears.

“Erwin?” You asked. He nods. Your watery eyes understood that if he’s there, in front of you, it means he’s dead. You run, hugging him. His scent is as clear as always, his arm tangled on your waist. You cry on his chest and he cries on your neck.

“I’m sorry... I’m so sorry, y/n...” he says. His breath is irregular and his big hand massages your waist.

“It’s okay, Erwin. It’s okay.” Your hand strokes his hair, quietly.

“I told my soldiers to die for the humanity. I sacrificed them for what?” the shock after commanding a whole army, being aware of all the lives he risked for humanity, made him break. You hugged him, being there for him. "Why are you here, with me?"

"Because I love you." you simply say. "I'm still in love with you, Erwin." you answer. He looks at your face.

"You're not angry at me?" he asks. You shake your head.

"I guess you had your causes to avoid me. Maybe you don't like me even a bit or something, and that's totally right."

He knew he needed to explain everything to you, but, for now, he just need to feel your arms around him.

Now, you have all eternity to be together.

#aot fluff #aot x reader #snk fluff #snk x reader #snk fic #aot fic #aot scenario #aot fanfiction #snk headcanons #aot #erwin snk #erwin x you #aot erwin #erwin x reader #erwin smith #erwin angst #erwin fluff

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kate-read-that · 4 years

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Second Chances

Here it is!

" So you guys think I can't do it?" Rose asked, her eyebrows arched in indignity "I can't believe, after all this time, you still doubt my abilities".

"Its not about your abilities, Rose, but he's seven years older than us, and he's one of the best Guardians in the world, and Mia was just saying not even you could break the ice around him because of his personality!" Finished Lisa, trying to calm her Guardian's mood because of Mia's introduction.

The water-controller moroi had just finished telling them about the new Guardian in court, Dimitri Belikov, and how he was always so cold and strict. Apparently, Belikov's moroi, Ivan Zekklos, had died while he was on vacation permision, and the damphir had been required by Tasha Ozzera and moved into Court with her.

"I don't think there's a woman here he's interested in, and I've seen plenty trying to walk up to him and flirt in these last five days, but nothing! Don't worry Rose, its not about you" Mia kept saying, unaware of what was brewing in Rose's mind.

"What will you give me if I get his phone number?"

Mia laughed "You wont"

"But if I do?"

"Alright, I'll give you 20 bucks if you manage to get his number" Mia surrendered, entertained. Lissa moaned, indignified, but both girls struck hands and Rose got up from the chair.

They were sitting in one of the restaurants in Court when they had seen Dimitri, waiting for Lucas and Eddie to arrive to order. Just as Rose approached, Lucas Ozzera crossed the entrance door and walked up to them, accompanied by his main guardian, Eddie Castille.

"I didn't know Rose knew Dimitri, he just arrived at court a week ago" said Lucas, surprised.

" How do you know him?" Asked Lisa, surprised. Mia didn't turn around to say hi, too busy paying attention at Rose and Dimitri.

"He's dating my aunt, he's her guardian now and they are a couple as well... Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Fast! Tell Rose to leave!" Lisa moaned, panicking.

"How? She's facing the other way! I cant exactly goup to her and tel l her!" Mia was about to do just that, thinking of coming up with some dumb excuse, when Rose sat at the table in front of Belikov.

"Is anyone going to tell us what's going on?" Lucas asked, confused, while sitting next to Lissa. Eddie had the same face, except he sat facing the entrance door and looked around from time to time to stay vigilant.

All them watched the other table, expectant and afraid.

-----

Rose walked up to him, thinking of a dozen pick up lines that would get him a guy in a pub. But this was not a pub, and that guy was a living legend, so she decided to start simple.

"Hey, you're Guardian Belikov, right?" She said, trying to keep her voice friendly but sweet.

"I'm sorry, I'm a little busy right now"

Rose frowned. He hadn't even looked up from his book, even though he was sitting alone in a table for two without any food in front of him. Reading, without looking at her, who, by they way, was looking beautiful on her free day.

"Right, I'm sorry, I just wanted to present myself because I'm new here, didn't want to be an annoyance" she put just the exact amount of sadness and pity in that sentence, knowing full well how she could pretend inocence in any situation.

At that, the tall guy lifted his head. His eyes were so dark, almost black. He was cute, Rose thought "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to be rude, I was just finishing this chapter. Yes, I'm Dimitri Belikov, but I'm afraid I'm even newer than you, Guardian..."

"Hathaway, but everyone calls me Rose when I'm off duty" she smiled, noticing how his eyes lingered in her new dress just a second. Getting closer, she thought, satisfied.

"I guess you're related to Jeanine Hathaway in some way, right?"

Rose felt her smile fell "I'm her daughter"

"I didnt know she had a daughter" Dimitri said, frowning. Rose thought maybe this bet was a little stupid, because he was feeling like punching something, not flirting.

"Yeah, he prefers to act like I don't exist, but here I am" she didn't even try to cover her annoyance in that moment, although she knew she was losing him.

"Not all parents are good parents" he seemed deep in thought while saying that, and Rose thought she was going to leave now, because the conversation had found had found a dead stop. He surprised her.

"Would you like to sit until my company arrives?"

Rose studied him. Dimitri Belikov didnt seem the pity kind of guy, and he didn't seem to be pitying her now. And yet, he didn't seem like he was flirting, neither, and there was no other reason he would ask her to sit with him.

She sat.

"Now, would you tell me why did you want to talk to me?" Dimitri arched a brow, and Rose decided he looked cute again, and she had to play her part.

"I just told you-"

"I arrived here five days ago, I'm probably the worst person you could choose to set a conversation and I don't know any other guardians here. Besides, the full table that you come from tells me you're not having problems with socialising ."

Well, this is not going well, she thought. Dimitri didnt seem mad, but he still didn't seem flirty, or entertained, not even satisfied at having seen trough her. He seemed curious, though, and a little too serious for a 26 year old man.

She knew if she confessed then and there, he would send her to her table again, and she'd rather go back to the academy with Kirova than face one of the bests guardians in the world telling everybody how she got in a flirting bet with him and lost because he sent her away. Even if it meant losing in front of Mia.

"Alright, I came here because I know you're one of the bests and I wanted you to train me from time to time" she didn't even know where that had come from.

"What?" Dimitri looked perplexed. She thought fast.

"Well, I was the best Guardian in my generation in the Academy, and I know I'm pretty good, but ever since I'm here I've had little chances to fight against someone as good as me, and they say you're awesome, and we're both going to be here for a while"

"You're not humble, I see"

"Why? Like I said, best in my year at St Vladimirs"

He would reject her, because no one wanted to be a teacher, and also because she was already a Guardian, she'd say she understood, and they would part ways happily. She would lose her bet, but her dignity would remain intact. She could tell Mia he was just too serious for her.

But right as Dimitri opened his mouth, someone touched Rose's shoulder.

"I see you've met Dimka, Rose" a woman voice sounded from behind her. When Rose turned around, she smiled. Tasha Ozzera, in her typical jeans and top, was smiling down at her. Rose loved Tasha. She was one of the few moroi she could tolerate most of the time, and her scars and her story made her everything Rose would have wanted in an older sister.

"Do you know Tasha?" Belikov asked, surprised.

"Of course we know each other, Dimitri. Her moroi is Lisa Dragomir, Lucas' girlfriend. She's been friends with both since they were in the Academy, we met during winter about two years ago, remember Rose?"

Rose would remember that winter until the day she died, specially Mason, so brave yet so stupid, driving them all into danger, only to die when it seemed they had almost saved themselves. She would remember his face when the strigois killed him until she was buried in the ground. Instead of saying that, she forced a smile.

"Tasha and I have agreed we totally need to go hunting Strigois together at some point."

If Tasha noticed the lapse on her face, she didnt react to it. Dimitri, on the other hand, had that curious expression again on his face.

"I'm really happy you two met each other, I knew you would become great friends with my boyfriend, Rose" Tasha smiled, hugging her.

This time, because of lack of practice, it took Rose a little bit more to keep her face straight. She was going to murder Mia. She was sure Mia knew the truth and she just wanted to embarrass Rose as a joke, but she was so dead. Good news was, Dimitri was marking the page of his book right then so he didn't see her face at that. He closed the book and looked up to Tasha again.

"Rose was just asking me to train her while in Court, to improve her skills with me".

Well, fuck.

"Oh my god, this is a great idea! You two have to be the best two Guardians here, it makes total sense that you train together!" Tasha looked even more excited now, and for the first time Rose cursed her openness and happiness at all times. Dimitri looked like he wanted to argue, but Tasha kissed him and turned around to look at Rose again.

"He trains everyday anyway, he could use some company in the meanwhile, specially since I can no longer train with him, now that I'm part of the queen's team of advice"

"You're what? But the Queen is..." Rose was getting more and more shocked the long the conversation went.

"And old, lying, conservationist witch, yeah, I know. I think she's trying to 'keep her enemies closer' or something, but I'm not complaining if I can push some good changes into it" Tasha smiled, shrugging.

"Tasha, you shouldn't say those things outloud..." Dimitri looked around, as if someone was about to stab her with a fork for cursing the Queen. But she laughed, careless "Dimka, dear, she knows what I think of her. She's cruel and a liar, but she's not stupid or deaf or blind". Rose and her laughed, but Belikov seemed to get more distressed with every word. And yet, Rose observed, his face remained almost unchanged, like a marble sculpture. Someone that had payed less attention would have seen it.

"Well, I should leave you two to eat alone, I'll go to my table know that I got what I wanted" Rose smiled while getting up, like she wasn't stuck with more training lessons right when she thought she was finnally free. Damn her and her weird excuses, and damn Mia as well.

Dimitri frowned but nodded, and Tasha told her goodbye as she sat in the same chair, smiling wide and holding Dimitri's hand.

Rose managed to walk normally to her table, and then lost it right in front of Mia.

"Im so sorry, Rose, I didnt know she was dating Tasha until Lucas came, I swear!"

"How old are you? Flirting bet, really?" Lucas seemed to be the only one in the table that found it funny. Eddie seemed to be worried he'd have to stop Rose from attacking Mia, and Lisa was relieved Tasha hadn't realize what was going on.

"Im stuck with training lessons! I dont need training lessons! I'm already the best, and I already have limited free time. Not that I care, because it's Lisa, but come on!" Rose whispered, trying to sound mad and outraged but remain unheard at the same time.

"Can't you tell him you've changed your mind?" Asked Lisa, always diplomatic.

"And say what? That I want more free time? He's one of the bests guardians in the world, some guardians call him Daí, I can't let him have a bad impression of me, Lisa!" Rose murmured, angrier. "He'll think I'm lazy or unconsistent. Now I have to go and be the best student he's seen."

"You think you can be a good student with him? Its no like you were the most rule follower in the academy, exactly" Lucas said, smiling wide at Rose's issue.

"I'm not going to risk every Guardian here hearing I'm bad at my job. The Queen already hates me, she'd have me in the filing room forever if Lisa hadn't been so insisting she wanted me, I can't let her have more against me. I'm going to be the best damn student Belikov's had, and he's going to tell everyone, Queen included, I'm the best Guardian he's seen".

#romitri #fanfic #rose hathaway #dimitri belikov #au #rose x dimitri #va #vampire academy #richelle mead #my work #damphir #moroi

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izzyfandoms · 5 years

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Okay so I had an au idea this morning and since I have too many ideas I decided not to write it and instead I'm just gonna make a (hopefully not too long) post about it. It features Moxiety and Intruloceit.

-Okay so it starts with a typical zombie apocalypse, though I'm gonna make it so you only turn when infected, so not everyone who dies turns into one because those ones can never really have happy endings

-Our main characters are Virgil Nicholas and Patton Foster, a couple who both work at a child care centre thing (idk what theyre called) that take care of kids up to twelve years old while they're parents are at work

-When the zombie outbreak hits their area (it hit other parts of the country first, and spread quickly), most of the kids were picked up by their parents, and most of the adults left to figure out what was going on, to drop children home, or they just ran away, leaving Virgil, Patton and about a dozen children - including ten-year-old Roman Prince (the eldest of the remaining children), eight-year-old Thomas Sanders, five-year-old Remy Starlight (the youngest) and six-year-old Toby Month.

-They spend the first few days hiding in the centre, having locked and boarded all doors and windows to the outside, eating the food they had left and listening to the radio for updates. The power went out after the first two days and the phones and computers ran out of charge quickly

-Sometimes there's banging and groans from the outside, sometimes even screams, and the group just huddles up together, half the kids are crying and Virgil and Patton have to keep shushing them until the noises are gone

-It's terrifying, and, though Virgil is 99% certain that it's zombies, Patton is adament that it's something small and that everything will be fixed soon.

-However, they run out of food after a few days, so Virgil (despite Patton's protests) goes out to the nearby grocery store to nab some more food for the kids

-There's a terrifying hour of waiting and kids crying that they're hungry and Patton's trying to calm them down and tell them stories

-Virgil returns eventually with a stolen shopping cart filled to the brim with food. He's covered with goop and blood and is shaking.

-He and Patton take the food to the kitchen (leaving Roman in charge temporarily as he's the youngest)

-Virgil reveals that it is in fact a zombie apocalypse and that he didn't see any other survivors in town. He then reveals that he thinks he should go back to the shop and get the rest of the food that he can get so it doesn't get raided first. They get into an argument about it, but in the end they spend the next few days raiding all the nearby shops for food, supplies and weapons (that they keep out of the littlest kids' reach)

-The next month or so passes with minimal incidents

-A rather large horde of zombies passes through at one point, and it's a terrifying day of waiting it out and hoping they don't break the doors down - because they could have, there were enough of them - and they consider themselves lucky to have survived that

-Half the kids catch a stomach bug at one point, and Virgil and Patton are terrified that something'll go wrong, but it ends up okay (they got medicine from a local pharmacy, but don't want to risk using the wrong ones or running out)

-There were also at least three instances of children threatening to run away because they want to find their families, but those are pretty easy to deal with (Patton may not know zombies, but he knows childcare)

-At one point Roman asks to learn how to use a gun just in case cos he's the oldest of the kids and it's heartbreaking but Virgil teaches him

-They spend most of their time cheering the kids up by telling stories, some of them fiction and some of them from the past

-Patton talks about his parents and his younger brother Dorian, who he hasn't seen in years (they drifted apart and Dorian probably didn't get along with their parents)

-The kids also talk about their families (they cry a lot, but it's nice to share and talk about)

-Roman talks about his own older brother Remus, who he didn't see much (he too didnt get along with their parents) but misses very much

-Sad times all around, but they all get super close because of it and Virgil and Patton basically end up like all the little kids' parents

-Anyway back to the main plot

-A bit over a month passes since the zombie apocalypse started, and they've got a pretty decent thing going on

-One day, they're all having story time in the main room, when they suddenly hear footsteps in the hallway

-They all go silent and Patton and Virgil stand protectively in front of the kids with guns

-The door opens and oh plot twist Patton's brother Dorian walks in,,, along with Roman's brother Remus

-Patton and Roman shout their brothers' names in unison and run up to them and there's tears and crying

-Patton's first reaction is 'what the heck' and Roman's first reaction is 'what the fuck' and Remus laughs but Patton scolds him

-Virgil then pretty much repeats the 'what the fuck' (partly cos it makes the kids giggle) and is like 'okay how did you even FIND us'

-Turns out Dorian has been looking for Patton for like Weeks (Remus assumed Roman was with his parents and is lowkey heartbroken to find that Roman's been here the whole time) cos the last time they brothers saw each other was before Patton got the job

-He ended up going back to search their parents house. Their parents weren't there but he found a pic at Patton's apartment. Took him a while to find it but when he did he found a pic of the daycare and went there and there they are.

-Patton and Roman's families have lived in this area their whole lives which is how Dorian and Remus know each other. Also they're dating and have a third boyfriend named Logan Picani. Logan lives with his brother on their parent's farm and is one of those people who've been preparing for the apocalypse for months.

-Dorian reveals Logan's existence before revealing that he and Remus are dating, he basically says 'yeah my other boyfriend lives on a farm its amazing for long term survival against zombies' (but he says it fancier than that)

-Virgil (he's met Dorian before) and Patton's reactions are basically:

Patton: other boyfriend?

Virgil: you're fucking a farmer?

-That almost starts a conversation where tiny Remy asks what fucking is and Remus (who is now holding Roman and will not let go) can not stop laughing

-Patton looks just about ready to choke Virgil and NOT in the kinky way. He doesn't though he's sweet like that

-Anyway Remus and Dorian drove a van here (it's the one Logan's family used to use to transport stuff to sell (it's just him and his brother Emile left though)) so they just about manage to stuff all of them plus as much rations as possible inside

-They make it to the farm and it's got like metal fences and a big gate and yeah Logan's 100% be preparing for the apocalypse for years

-But it wasn't just the whole 'paranoid scientist' (oh yeah he's a scientist) thing, he's actually been hearing of scientists trying to resurrect the dead for a while now and it was going weirdly and he didn't like the sound of that so he was preparing

-The farm has chickens, sheep, horses and bees as well as vegetables and a pond and stuff it used to have a ton of farm hands but like they all left to find their families so it was just Logan, Emile (Logan's brother) and Logan's boyfriends (Dorian and Remus ofc) tending the farm since the apocalypse

-Also Logan's been stockpiling a ton of books with information needed to do all kinds of useful things

-Basically they all make it to the farm and it's all happy and they're safe and they can actually raise the kids properly with a good food and water supply. They set up a makeshift schooling system (Logan has so many books and they go back for the rest of the daycare stuff at some point and they raid so many librarys)

-What I'm saying is that they live happily ever after despite the tragedy that is the zombie apocalypse

-I mean if people don't automatically turn into zombies after death then the zombies will eventually rot away and die and it'll be just humans left and it'll be all good

-And I suppose you could make this angsty and add some bad shit happening but I'm not gonna for once lol

#me #sanders sides #sanders sides au #apocalypse au #zombie apocalypse au #moxiety #intruloceit #patton sanders #virgil sanders #deceit sanders #sympathetic deceit #remus sanders #sympathetic remus #logan sanders #roman sanders

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potatowitch · 4 years

Text

finding out that the star wars sequel series was written on the fly rather than actually planned out makes so much fucking sense but also pisses me off EVEN MORE because i watched the force awakens in 2016 and within a day of leaving the cinema had a fully fleshed out idea in my head of the direction the next two films would take and the plot points they would cover, all brainstormed in the shower. 16 year old me was more capable of writing a cohesive storyline than disney was. so here you are - i rewrote the sequels to be ten times better than what disney actually gave us. enjoy.

- after rey finds luke they train for a bit then he's like "gotta tell u something. u ever heard of mara jade? she's ur mum" "wait weren't u two dating for a bit" "yeah" "does that mean ur...." "...yeah"

- "why did u leave me on jakku?" "i didnt. she did. i only just learned u existed i wouldve come for u" "oh."

- "...can i call u dad or" "i would be honored if u did"

- meanwhile at the resistance base leia realises finn is force sensitive, gives him her old lightsaber she had in the comics

- because come on. rewatch the force awakens and tell me that man aint fuckin feeling the "shitloads of voices cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced" when starkiller goes off

- and he picks up a lightsaber and instinctively knows how to use it?

- also: two main heroes in a star wars film being a queer coded woman and a queer coded black man.

- and the whole "used to be a stormtrooper and defected, becomes a jedi" is a TOTALLY NEW storyline? not some tired old "white boy villain is a dick for three movies then suddenly turns Good TM right at the end" trope

- make rey explicitly asexual. she's beautiful and smart and got abs that make everyone who sees them MELT but she is NOT INTERESTED in anything but JUSTICE and PLATONIC HUGS

- finn and poe are also making out because come on, disney, if u wanted to show you're becoming more progressive having a loving interracial gay romance is the fucking easiest way to do it. BB8 has two dads and they share The Jacket

- turns out finn is a kenobi because u cannot tell me obi wan didnt Fuck. jedi code says "dont form attachments" but watch the clone wars - obi wan plays fast and loose w the jedi code at the best of times. now we got a skywalker and a kenobi working together being best buds again, THE WAY IT SHOULD BE.

- the destruction of starkiller has crippled the first order. don't fucking look at me like "the resistance just won a major, VERY VISIBLE victory but OOO no somehow they're still very low on numbers and infrastructure" NO. the public destruction of starkiller has earned the resistance an influx of allies. the republic has started publicly supporting them. the first order spent years building that thing and now not only is all that time, effort and MONEY gone, they lost a shitload of staff and military personnel when it blew up

- "the first order is rich" is a plot point I DO NOT UNDERSTAND because it directly contradicts what's going on in the expanded universe books. the first order was built from remnants of the empire that had been banished to the outer reaches of the galaxy to live out of broken down, shitty old star destroyers.

- it's the reason hux, who was raised in a decrepit old academy in the ass end of the universe by an abusive father, is SO anti republic. in his head, it's the reason he starved as a child. it's the reason his mother is dead. it's the reason he had to be raised by a father that beat him. his hatred for the republic is PERSONAL

- disney learn how to write a good villain challenge? hux EASILY could have been terrifying AND sympathetic

- hux and kylo now have to deal with how absolutely PISSED snoke is that both of them failed with starkiller. hux gets force choked and threatened. kylo gets snoke very painfully rooting around in his head. it is emphasised that snoke's relationship with these two is downright abusive.

- somewhere in there, they realise that the whole five years they've known each other snoke has been deliberately pitting them against each other and sneakily forcing them to undermine each other's authority

- they realise it was snoke's shitty leadership that lead to the destruction of starkiller. they realise that maybe they'd be better off on their own

- the two of them plot to murder snoke themselves. while this is happening, the resistance is happily building an army, gathering resources, and forming alliances. luke and rey have reunited with the resistance and now rey and finn are both happily training with luke.

- snoke dies. hux decides to take the mantle of emperor. kylo LETS HIM because he realises he doesn't know shit about fuck when it comes to leading anything more than his knights. has a crisis of confidence about how useful he actually is, then hux decides he wants to keep the knights of ren around as his personal "fuck up the resistance" squad.

- the two of them working together turn out to be fucking terrifying, competent villains. the films have short, five to ten minute sections where they explore their VERY SIMILAR traumas to make them sympathetic WITHOUT making them seem like "uwu they're not actually bad people" because THEY'RE STILL AWFUL GENOCIDAL MASS MURDERERS

- on the kylo trauma side: it's made obvious in the books that from about age 6 snoke has been in his head deliberately grooming him away from his family. make that obvious in the films. make its impact on kylo obvious in how unsure of himself he actually is. don't make his "redemption arc" one where he suddenly goes light side. give him a bastardisation arc where he realises his whole life he has never made a choice - and then make THE FIRST ORDER his choice. (it is the wrong choice! emphasise that! but make him MAKE THAT CHOICE)

- the resistance thinks they're doing well. they have two new jedi. they've seen very little of the first order outside of small operations that they've been squashing. they think "hm. starkiller's loss must have crippled them. we're doing well!"

- until they learn actually. they've got an emperor now. and the commander of the knights of ren is INCREDIBLY loyal to him. the first order is PISSED OFF and VENGEFUL. they're back with a force. they've started invading and subjugating planets even with their forces cut as thin as they are because hux is a military mastermind and kylo and the knights of ren are a fucking TERRIFYING unit in combat.

- also why did disney decide to present hux in the films as a weak pissbaby when he probably topped his class in all combat situations and fights dirty in close quarters. man can SNIPE. man will bite your fucking finger off if you manage to disarm him. he is a 6 foot beanpole and he will kick your ass

- kylo has a crisis about actually having to kill his mother, uncle and cousin. he still feels a bit bad about han - despite everything, he still loves them and is struggling. he actually confides in his knights about this. we get to see that the knights of ren have a found family dynamic with their commander and they comfort him.

- kylo realises it will be painful to murder the last of his bio family but it must be done, because he's come around to hux's view that the resistance and the republic are standing in the way of true peace in the galaxy. he actually believes that reinstating an empire is the best thing for the galaxy. this makes him a more effective villain because he actually believes what he's doing is right.

- more stormtroopers defect to the resistance. finn is there to welcome them and help them adjust. there's a couple of lowkey force sensitive troopers in there too. we learn more about how horrible, soul crushing and traumatic stormtrooper training is. this is a good way to keep painting the first order as an organisation that violates human rights and the geneva convention at every turn.

- the first order makes up for this loss of troops in picking up recruits from the planets they've taken over in the outer rim because they've been providing stability. again - it is SO EASY to write the first order as sympathetic villains WHO ARE STILL FASCIST ASSHOLES. this would've been such a good opportunity to show the moral argument between stability vs freedom. show the flaws in the republic because they do exist!! we see that throughout the ENTIRE expanded universe! every iteration of the republic fails in some way!

- the fight against the first order becomes increasingly more difficult, but they're actually on pretty even ground. it doesn't make sense to me that disney decided to go for the route of "the resistance should've been squished easily by the might of the first order but uwu kylo can't make up his mind and thats what saves them!" that is not a compelling storyline! they are relatively evenly matched and the resistance only JUST comes out on top!

- kylo kills luke in actual combat, not just "luke randomly dissolves for ... no good reason?". this hits the resistance HARD. rey and finn have to struggle with their desire for revenge. leia realises her son is beyond help. it nearly breaks her. she has a moment where she feels like she has lost everything. poe has to step in to remind her she still has him. it is revealed that he joined the resistance after the first order killed his family HORRIBLY when he was a teenager and he and leia sort of have a mother/son relationship.

- this is also a good way to juxtapose hux and kylo. they took their trauma and it made them awful. poe takes his trauma and it makes him kind. it makes him want to protect people from what he went through. also gets rid of the "haha we made the latino man have a drug dealer background" bullshit that disney did

- poe also has to comfort his boyfriend and best friend and remind them that they are fighting to make the galaxy a better place, NOT for revenge. then they have a discussion about "yeah, don't make revenge your main priority, but the jedi were a bit wrong in saying that you shouldn't enjoy it anyway. it's going to feel good to fucking murder kylo and that's okay". acknowledgement that the old jedi code was garbage and too restrictive for actual PEOPLE to follow it.

- kylo still can't kill leia or chewie. we get flashbacks of her singing to him, braiding his hair, comforting him after nightmares. we see baby ben riding on chewie's shoulders. seeing the conflict between kylo recognising his family loved him and still choosing to be a villain would have RUINED ME. he tells hux this, expecting hux to shoot him for it. hux understands - he had a mother, once. the republic killed her.

- (they actually didn't. she was an imperial slave and was probably left behind when an imperial settlement was being razed. the only reason hux actually survived was because he was his father's only heir. there's a whole spiel in the books about brendol going "this kid is a piece of shit bastard i dont want him" and imperial officials being like "the empire needs kids. go pick him up")

- hux decides to kill leia instead. he nearly dies doing so because woman is STILL a force to be reckoned with even at this age. remember she is actually trained to use a lightsaber AND guns. the only reason hux doesn't die? kylo steps in at the last minute and kills his own mother. he's made his choice. he mourns, and then he steels. there is nothing left to pull him to the light side anymore.

- anakin has given up trying to bring his grandson to the light from beyond the grave. him and obi wan are focusing their force ghost attention on rey and finn. now luke and leia are both there too. we get the same "all my jedi ancestors are rooting for me" moment that disney gave us, except now it's shared between rey and finn.

- the two of them plus chewie cut through the knights of ren until they get to kylo. he kicks the living shit out of them, but they manage to kill him. rey earns some gnarly, sexy scars. chewie needs a hug and goddamn does he get one.

- poe is the one to kill hux. he's not just doing it for the galaxy, he's doing it for leia. the first order already stole his first family from him. he won't lose his second family to them. bonus points if BB8 joins the fight and like ... tases hux in the leg a few times.

- we get some gratuitous "c3p0 and r2 are sneaking through an imperial base and fucking shit up but like, badly because 3p0 never stops talking" scenes

- you want to bring rose tico into it? she's head of the resistance's infiltration team. she's with the droids taking down shields, stabbing people in the back, freeing prisoners, stealing plans, sowing chaos. she's the one who finally takes down phasma.

- without their emperor and the knights of ren, the new empire crumbles pretty quickly. the resistance has taken HEAVY losses but they have won. we get a very beautiful funeral scene for luke and leia. there's a gorgeous group hug between finn, rey, poe, chewie and bb8. poe and finn smooch against the sunset.

- we see finn and rey going into crystal caves to get kyber crystals. poe, chewie, bb8, r2 and 3P0 wait outside the cave in the falcon for them to be done picking up their crystals, then we see finn and rey inside the falcon building their new lightsabers with guidance from a bunch of force ghosts. we get to see that rey has chosen to decorate the inside of the falcon with a bunch of potted plants so she can be surrounded by greenery at all time. the found family aesthetic is STRONG

- rey builds a saber pike. it comes out golden. finn builds a standard single blade saber that comes out white, like ahsoka's. gold to emphasise protection of the weak and the perfect blend of combat and scholarly pursuits. white to emphasise free will from both the jedi and the sith. it is emphasised that these two will NOT be your traditional jedi.

- we see an epilogue where poe is working to help shift the republic's focus from political squabbling to actually protecting its citizens. he leads reconstruction efforts, helps establish more of a presence in the outer rim, constantly fights for moving resources from protecting the republic's assests to providing food, shelter and safety to its citizens.

- finn is constantly by his side. we see him protecting his new husband, on the front lines destroying remnants of the empire and the first order, and using his combat prowess to absolutely murder slave owners.

- rey has taken to training new force sensitives with chewie by her side, however she recognises the jedi code has been failing force sensistives for millennia, and instead her teachings are more aligned with the grey jedi philosophy. she recognises that people feel anger, hate, grief - and that they are all valid emotions. it's what you choose to do with them that is important.

- she actively encourages personal connection, believing that loving your friends and family is righteous and the true path to the light side. her apprentices all adore her, and she is always there for them - she'll listen to their worries, from something as small as "i am 13 years old and my first crush just rejected me" to "i am a former slave coming to you after the first order murdered my family and tortured me. i am having nightmares and am afraid of the anger i feel".

- she encourages apprentices to stay in contact with their family, and she becomes that family for the ones who have lost theirs.

- you get the feeling that this time, peace in the galaxy is actually going to last. anakin, obi wan, luke and leia look on from the Force in pride at their children and grandchildren. they did good. they can finally rest.

- the sequels have made personal choice a major theme. finn chooses to defect. poe and rey choose to be kind, when they have every reason not to be. hux and kylo make the wrong choices. there's no flip flopping like a dead fish between good and evil until the very last second. the lines between kindness and freedom and hatred and subjugation are clearly drawn again and again.

- i sit in the cinema after the screen goes black and i weep. i am satisfied. this was a fitting end for a franchise i have loved for most of my life.

#star wars #star wars sequel trilogy #anti disney #they really fucked up one of my favourite things and i will never forgive them #star wars fix it #i was a literature nerd in school #can you tell?#stormpilot #finnpoe

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eyecicles · 5 years

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for 001 mellonear, for 002 misa, for 003 EITHER soichirou, matsuda, aizawa, mogi and ide OR the 5 kiras

Meronia:

when I started shipping it if I did:

It’s an interesting ship, but I technically don’t ship it myself. Though I guess I got over my initial dislike of it, since I (for several reasons) saw their relationship in a more brotherly light than I do now. Dunno when that happened, though. Probably around last year?

my thoughts:

I can appreciate the drama of it and I usually see it as one-sided, actually. The thought of Near pining for Mello certainly hits me deep… I do understand why people want to see them together. However, something in me also wants Near to have a more “easy” and chill romantic relationship, haha. It’s definitely just a matter of preference, though.

What makes me happy about them:

What even is happy about that ship? I like the thought of them properly reconciling. I like how they’re both smiling when Mello leaves Near’s headquarters. I like how Obata said that Near put more effort into Mello’s finger puppet because he likes him.

What makes me sad about them:

Basically everything else. Mello could have had a real and trustworthy friend in Near, and just thinking about how Near practically forgives Mello everything & how he respects him until the end….. It makes my heart ache.

things done in fanfic that annoys me:

I don’t like it when Mello is overly aggressive and for no reason. Like, the man has a sense of humour, he likes to feel like your typical unapproachable diva who’s above everything - it’s just that he has one Berserk Button. But that doesn’t mean that he absolutely can’t talk normally to Near, because he can.

things I look for in fanfic:

I don’t usually seek out Meronia fics. But I like it when people include Mello’s duality & Near’s cheekiness and genuine affection for Mello.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other:

I actually prefer both of them with Matt, lol. Mello is also interesting with B and even Misa (he always was weirdly shippable for me).

My happily ever after for them:

L elopes to a nice island and explicitly makes both Near and Mello his heirs & they work together as L for the rest of their lives

who is the big spoon/little spoon:

Mello never initiates cuddling so Near is almost always the big spoon, hehe

what is their favorite non-sexual activity:

Being L together, probably

Misa:

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:

It’s annoying how she was fridged and basically reduced to comic relief in the second arc. And, in general, Ohba didn’t realise how interesting Misa could have been. I don’t know if I have anything specific for her in mind, but it’s sad how one of the more memorable scenes in the second arc was her pointless dinner with Kiyomi.

my OTP:

Nah

my cross over ship:

Uuuhhh. I don’t have one but I just had the idea of Misa x Tharja (Fire Emblem), which would be hilarious

a headcanon fact:

(Headcanon fact?) She died her hair blue as a teenager

How I feel about this character:

Mixed feelings. On the one hand, I like how unapologetic awful she is & I think Obha accidentally gave her a pretty complex personality, but on the other hand… I resent how she sometimes stirred the plot in a (in my opinion) less interesting direction. I still enjoy her as a character most of the time and I don’t dislike her - I just never warmed up to her, either.

All the people I ship romantically with this character:

I like her a bit with Sayu, Mello and Mogi

My non-romantic OTP for this character:

Her and Ryuk!

My unpopular opinion about this character:

I think she’s worse than Light and not because she’s annoying.

003 | send me 5 characters and I will rank them in order of preference:

I will rank the five Kiras for you because today is a special day for Kira!

Mikami

Kiyomi

Light

Misa

Higuchi

#ask meme #anon #meronia #mello #near #misa amane

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fairyiatlotl · 7 years

Text

The Vampire That Longs For Mirror

There are three things you should know about me.

Im a vampire (hot scary fanged immortals that live on blood as in blood).

My name is Zhae (Its pronounced as Zshay, so please dont try pronouncing any other way).

And I have a huge butt (well the story is all about this).

Have you ever looked at the sky at night? Bet you would have been awed by the sight of it – bet you would have tried tracing out the zodiac signs – bet you would have tried spotting your zodiac and had felt happy about it – bet you would have had told the special characterstics of it and how it miraculously fit your description –bet you would have done all that and happily felt categorised into something that you feel proud to be born in.

Have you ever looked into the mirror? – Naked? Bet you would have hesitated a moment – bet you would have hated that one extra flab coming out – bet you would have hated how your bones are all that was visible – bet you would have hated the way your boobs dont grow the size they should – bet you would have hated the large butt that swings every damn time you walk – bet you would have hated those eyebrows out of proportion – bet you would have hated the way your underarm hair left a dark patch – bet you would have compared yourself to a thousand other people – bet you would have felt ashamed of yourself and what you have made yourself into – bet you would have asked yourself when is your body going to be happy – bet you would have done all that and still ignored the clitoris that you are supposed to be proud to be born with.

Thats how stupid we are; letting our zodiac signs make us feel happy about us while letting the mirror NOT feel happy about us. And I know this because once upon a time I used to think in this exact same way until one day I woke up seventeen and a vampire. And boy was I happy! Nope this aint Twilight, who am I kidding? – I mean I was kind of hysterically happy but for just a second. The belief that vampires are godly beautiful made me expect miraculous changes until I realised Ive not turned into a Beyonce-bod vampire but am forever trapped into a Beyonce-bod that weighs 80 kgs. So Congratulations to me! Am no more a mortal endomorph! Hurray! The vampire beauty curse epically punctured my gorgeous body dream! – I became a fat-ass immortal. Period.

Coming from a society where fit figure is an aspect of befitting element, do you realise how much stress would you go through once you realised that you are gonna be trapped for the rest of your immortal life in the body that you fed for seventeen heavenly years of your life – its like having permanent thyroid problem – its like being trapped in those epic novels that you love. Yea so I got trapped in my True Blood. I got trapped in my jeans. I got trapped in my body. And it sucked.

The next few days after my transition the thought of being forever fat did not even cross my mind. The funny thing was, I was reminded by the ignorants of this society that I could never ever wear a twenty six waist jeans. It was Aunt Shinzah; shes a dreamy doll aunt – everyone loves her; shes too pretty and too sweet, unfortunately she is too determined to make each and everyone happy. We were in the living room and she and her husband; Uncle Drad came for tea. I sat with the family to entertain them and while we were in a full swing of laughter and fun she said; Oh Baby! You look like you lost some pretty weight. Oh darling! You wait – youll lose weight as soon as you enter college; youll be as pretty as a sunshine; she passed me a smile. I felt so happy that she thought I lost some weight (should have known it was because I had starved for a week). My glass of delusion was cracked by Rob (the guy who apparently turned me into a vampire because he was too high to remember) who I met the very next day. He got scared at how pathetic I looked; I happily smiled and said that I was losing. He smirked at my foolish conclusions; No – youre hungry. Youre not losing weight. Gawd youre a vampire – you are never losing weight. Your body is frozen; I remember that day well and clear, I remember how the taste of my throat changed from sweet to vomit-like. I remember the guilt face of Rob as how he noticed my hurt. That day I killed my first human: He was a forty five year old drunkard that had abandoned his wife and children while he ogled every piece of an ass that walked by the 56th Bay street (and yes I am trying to justify my kill with this one sentence). He was eating Lays with booze; my hunger hormones couldnt resist. That day I felt pathetic at my existence. I actually wished for death – just walking and sitting made me feel ashamed of myself. But I couldnt ignore the fact that my body felt strong and healthy and ALIVE! That day I got the taste of human blood. It was irresistibly Lays-like!

The feeling of being the object of fun is one dark feeling induced by shallow mindedness. That day nothing was wrong; all was normal, I was infact happy and feeling healthy until my math period. The teacher had some grudge against me; reason to which was anonymous to me. He asked for our assignments, he started scolding each and every student in line; my heart was already in my throat I knew that he was going to scold me for no reason. He was a bully, what do you expect of him! He atlast came across me. He looked at me from under his bushy eyebrows, he radiated disgusted criticism and mean looks and then he came on at me (and am the vampire here!) he started yelling at me – he told me how pathetic my work is, that he would better thrash me on the floor ten times than better ever check my assignment ever again (by the way that assignment was an obsolete method of wasting mind, time and energy). This was not it. The next day when I entered class, he was filling some health forms. He came across my name and started laughing; Zhea huh! Even shes gonna write her weight here atlast; he laughed in his evilish snort and some of the front benchers joined him. What are you Zhea? An eighty or a hundred? soon the whole class joined in his act of evilness.

The next day he died in a sudden accident he met on the mid-way road that leaves the city (I wish this guy drowns in the pits of hell – I wish the Satan takes his personal interest in him and gut him with his pitch fork until he drowns in the lavas of the hell!). Dont judge me, he was the one at fault. I thought his death would stop my body shaming and public bullying. I was wrong. Everyone had started looking at me/my ass as an object of laughter by that time. Why wouldnt they? Well when the elders of the society take pleasure in this why shouldnt they? After all its the elders and teachers we look up to. It all came to an end. Even my distant hearing capability became a nuisance to me. I could hear boys talk about butts, I could hear girls talk about the methods to avoid a butt like mine. I could hear girls search over net the category to which my butt belonged to. I apparently fit into the peach figure among several other types: hour glass, straight line, inverse peach blah blah blah! It was there all over internet; the figure categorization of a womens body that is indirectly set for pleasing the patriarchs of our society. So much for gender equality!

The most pathetic part was, I was letting myself being treated that way; I being the vampire did not retaliate or infact confront anyone coming over to me and making fun of my so called healthiness (bullies gave me nicknames like fatty or dinosaur while friends gave me the consolatory adjectives like healthy; ironic right?). But believe me this was nothing to the final act that actually made me hate myself – the funny thing was it was an inanimate object that told me that I absolutely wasnt meant to fit in this society. It was just one chair – a students chair which had a side swing table hinged to it; I sat on it – I didnt fit. So I tried and when I fit I realised I was stuck; by the end of the class I struggled but then when the bell rung I awkwardly tried getting off the chair and then I heard; Look look Hahaha Hehehe God Am so happy to be me today; all the snickering, sniggering, simpering and whispering of all forty five fellow mates got me. It got me and thats when it happened – I lost it.

Seventeen years of my life I had been hearing people wait for me to get slim and pretty, seventeen years of my life Ive heard my father call me with funny names, seventeen years of my life Ive heard my sister flaunt me her figure and give me goals to reach, seventeen years of my life Ive been hit with comments and been joked about, seventeen years Ive been asked to dress myself in a way that nobody could see the fat-flesh of mine, seventeen years Ive cried about the fact I bloat even when my diet is exactly the same amount like any other persons, seventeen years Ive actually never looked into the mirror with pride and glory or in a way that I feel happy about myself or my body, seventeen years Ive felt ashamed of my ass and me, seventeen years were given to me to change myself. SEVENTEEN FUCKING YEARS IVE BEEN GIVEN THE CHANCE TO BE SOMEONE THAT THIS SOCIETY WANTED ME TO BE! Still it took the curse of eternity to make me realise to love me. How foolish we humans are, right?

The following days were followed by insidious depression. Vampire depressions are worse than human depressions they are like black holes that temporarily feel likely to be filled by the lust of human blood, but as soon as you hunt one down another appears for more – its actually a black hole in me that build: consuming every inch of me per person I killed. The depression was a slow perpetual intricate build up. It first started with the reckless killing of animals, then isolated hobos and then it lashed out as the most horrifying thing you could ever imagine. I started cutting myself. How? Well it started when I slit off my extra flesh in the shower. It hurt me like hell but it was the best way to release my anger and anxiety – the best way to punish myself for having flabs. Once I had cut myself, I would heal but I always ended up being hungrier and so I had to go hunting again. Soon it became my daily cycle. Nobody knew it, nobody noticed it. And why would they? Everyone was too busy feigning happiness and I was too busy killing mine.

Breaking away from my beloved cycle wasnt a choice. Rob found me one day all bloody and weak. This time it went far; I could have actually have actually died (could you believe that!) but luckily Rob smelled leakage of blood and he came running to my bedroom. He was horrified by the sight. He found me in my tub; I wasnt dead, just numb; all my blood was in the tub. Soon I lost conscience; when I opened my eyes again I found myself on the bed. I wasnt feeling hungry like the other times I felt. I was feeling physically normal. The sun was shining and it all came back – the frustration, depression, anger, hurt, hate. I again felt pathetic about myself. While my mind wandered in the dark miasma that I had created inside my head, my eyes wandered around the room; I saw a flower pot by the open window. That was different since I didnt keep a flowerpot by my window. It must have been mom, I thought.

Hey dumbhead; a voice came from the door; Mazie was standing there. Mazie is my Nana – we dont call her Nana for some specific reason that even we are oblivious to. Mazie? What are you doing here? I looked at her; I felt the warmth that she radiated.

Dont ask me silly questions! You were out for a whole godamn week and you ask me why am here? You gotta be kiddin me! Now get up and get ready we are going for shopping Mazie is one stubborn Nana – she has got my genes of holding onto things and being stubborn about them. What shopping? I asked with absolute confusion.

Well bikini shopping – we are going to the beach tomorrow; she gave me her Cheshire cat smile as she crossed the room and checked the flowers. It was she who got them.

Bikini shopping? I must confess she is the only living person that is scarier than a vampire after a hunger strike; I dont do bikini shopping; I answered with a wavering voice. Mazie looked at me with sceptic eyes and sighed heavily; Well! Its about time that you start doing it; she raised her eyebrow. I felt my cheeks flush. Bikini shopping? How could I do that? I hated my body. I hated myself. I felt pathetic and embarrassed about it. My eyes widened and I could feel tears brimming my eyes; I cant do that; I heard my voice mumble.

Yes you can! You in fact will; Mazie raised her head and I could see her poker face; Zhae – its just a bikini; she took the flower pot and moved towards me; Dont let a piece of cloth weigh you down; she kept the flowerpot next to me and patted my cheeks. They knew.

That day we went for bikini shopping and spa. I had no idea what was happening or what was going to happen tomorrow. The bikini was good but I again felt embarrassed about my weight. The spa on the other hand made me feel heaven like; I could feel my body relax. The next day I wore a long baggy shirt over my bikini. Mazie didnt say anything just gave me a look. I looked around and saw people playing and having fun in their shorts and bikinis; they looked gorgeous. But then I noticed something; I noticed a man with a big belly playing with his seven year old daughter, I noticed an old women rub sunscreen on herself, I noticed a women of twenties with a bulging belly run down the beach with her sister who apparently had the biggest breasts Ive ever seen, I noticed a boy with absolutely no flesh on him sit on the life guard post, I noticed chubby boys eat popsicles, I noticed a child rolling down the sand mount, I saw people getting wet as the waves hit the shore, I saw life happening around me and I felt so aloof and sad. I again felt angry but this time I wasnt angry at the society for not treating me well – I felt angry at myself for waiting for the society to treat me well. I immediately got up and walked away to the shops nearby. I entered a shady lane and cried my eyes out. I felt so agitated and irritated and so annoyed that I wanted to just end everything. I hated being a vampire, I hated being cursed with this body; I wanted to stop my misery. I wanted to know how was everyone on the beach confident enough to stand straight and play and enjoy; I wanted to know the secret because I also wanted to wear bikini freely; I also wanted to be a part of this happiness that everyone seem to radiate. I had to see how bad I looked – I needed to analyse and accept how I looked and moreover I wanted to see why it mattered to me to look Barbie perfect for wearing a bikini on a beach. I needed to know.

After a while I got up and roamed around the lanes, and there I saw something that induced a spectacular idea in my head. I entered a sketch shop. I took off my top and paid for a bikini portrait of mine. I still remember that one hour of portrait making – that one hour of exposing myself to me. It gave me the acceptance I needed. That one hour was totally worth it. When I came out with my sketch I smiled. I saw a piece of a bikini body that was made by an artist. I saw a piece of an art, I saw myself reflected in that small piece of paper and it made me feel so true and so important for some reason. The very sketch made each and every cell in my body release endorphins. I fell in love with my portrait. It was a fine feeling, tears brimmed my eyes and I hugged it. It felt good to make yourself feel mattered. Thats what I had to learn to finally accept myself. I analysed as I went down to the beach that I did not look bad at all, I looked okay, absolutely fabulous! In fact I looked really beautiful and confident. I seemed normal. I seemed human.

That day was my first day to ever walk on beach with only bikini on. Mazie was proud. And I prouder. I atlast had found my mirror.

#body shaming #short story #body love #vampire #teen fiction #teen stories #bloodlust #food #mental illness #mental health #body hate #art #mirror

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fanfiction-mania · 7 years

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Risk it All (Chapter 15)

*a couple days later*

P.o.v Rocky

its been a couple of days since we found out that Rydel is pregnant and although her morning sickness makes things dificult for both of us we are just taking things one step at a time. "babe, i think it might be a good idea maybe to head back home tomorrow because as much as i want our baby to be born in colorado like we were i personally would much rather have our family there to see the baby when it's first born. i mean i know we literally just found out you're pregnant but in general i just think it would be best." i said. "okay, we should probably call everyone and let them know we are coming home" she said. "or... we could just go without saying anything and surprise them all and then we could tell them that you are pregnant at the same time... that is if you want" i said. With that she nodded in excitement as we began to pack up our stuff so we can head home.

P.o.v Ross

okay these pills actually work wonders. i mean after i was finished reading for a bit i took a nap and when i woke up i felt different. it wasn't just regular different either. It was as if the anti-depressants were actually working. incase you were wondering i kind of felt as if the idea of anti-depressants was just bullshit. That is until now. They honestly work wonders. I get off of my bed and I make my way into the living room to see if anyone was there. "hey mom!" i said with a cheery tone. "hey honey, i see the pills are working!" she replied with the same tone i had used. "yeah!" i said happily. after i said that the others except for Rydel and Rocky came in. "well someone seems pretty happy today" Riker said referring to me. "yeah, i actually went with mom to go see a doctor. and i got some meds and now I'm back to my old happy self." I said. "Well that's good!" He replied with a similar tone and he made his way over to me pulling me into a hug. "Great to have you back little bro" he said. Its great to be back!" I replied happily. "Let's go swimming!" Riker said excitedly like a little five year old. With that everyone cheered excitedly and we all quickly got changed into our swimsuits. After that we ran outside and dove into the pool one by one. After a couple of minutes of just getting used to the temperature of the water we decided to have a diving contest. We did that for a couple of hours or so and then we decided to get out. Once we got out we grabbed some towels and made our way inside after we were dry. After that we all decided to curl up and watch a movie.

P.o.v Rydel

Our flight from Colorado just landed and let me tell you, I am so happy to be back home in LA. I mean its awesome enough that Rocky and I are going to surprise our siblings in a while with the fact that we came home early but we now also get to surprise them with the news that I'm pregnant. I just can't wait for this drive home to be over so we can surprise everyone. This drive feels like its taking a lifetime when really its only a half hour between the airport and our house. Finally after what felt like a lifetime we pulled up the driveway. We got out of the car And went into the house as quietly as we possibly could. We made our way to the living room and everyone was watching a movie we waited there for a couple of seconds before saying anything. then Rocky spoke before i got the chance. "Well it looks like they didnt miss us too much hey there delly?" Rocky asked me jokingly. "nope not one bit" i replied making sure that everyone heard us. All of their heads popped up and turned to face us. "oh my god! you guys are finally home! everyone said excitedly. Before either Rocky or I could respond we were attached in hugs by our siblings. "so how was colorado?" Ryland asked us wiggling is eyebrows clearly knowing what he did even though no one told anyone about that. i blushed an intense shade of Red and Rocky was laughing trying not to go red like i currently am. "that actually brings us to some other news we would like to share with all of you..." Rocky said after his laughter died down. after that the room went silent. "Delly... do you want to tell them?" he asked. "okay sure.. uh well im sure you all know the reason for Rocky's disappearance that also caused me to follow him..." they all nodded for me to continue. "well as you may or may not know... Rocky and i made up back in Colorado and now..." i took a deep breath in. "im pregnant." i said. at first there was a strong silence but then everyone cheered with happiness. "i cant believe im going to be an uncle!" Riker cheered. "me niether! ross and Ryland said in unison. "I cant believe im going to be a grandma!" mom exclaimed. all of a sudden the room got silent as dad's face grew more serious. "now Rocky... if you ever... and when i say ever i mean it... if you ever hurt your sister... I will..." i looked over at dad and i could see he was trying so hard not to crack a smile. "daddy... you can cut the act... i can see you smiling and I'm sure everyone else can too now." i said which caused us all to burst into a giant fit of laughter. after all the laughter died down Dad spoke. "so what names were you maybe thinking?" he asked.

#rocky lynch #Rydel lynch #rockdel #fanfictions

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thegeminisage · 7 years

Text

time for MORE ZELDABLOGGING hell yeah today’s stream of consciousness:

i’ve decided that i wanna go south bc like im never gonna catch up with my brother and im Not in the mood to do heat-resistence stuff so i might as well see a thing he hasn’t, right?!

if i get too bored i can always turn around and go north!!

furthermore he’s getting closer to hyrule castle and i dont wanna lol

fast traveled to the dueling peaks and found the tower already

ooh and lake hylia is south as well! tho ofc im doing the southeast one first

and i’ll probably get tired of storyless exploring before i get out that far hahaha

wow the tower is close to the border, i can see the lake hylia province from here

there’s an Immense palm tree lookin jungle and i think i see a giant armos?

but the mountains divide it pretty neatly so it looks to be an easy walk assuming those guardian statues don’t move

ah. of course they move.

at least they can’t get up and walk around :|

too bad you can’t play around in the menu while you wait out rain. i’d rewatch m memories and shit

i climbed this one red looking cliff and the sky went green and the weather changed to all cloudy forever so im probably about to die

and just like that, glided to the tower. easy peasy

ah, the faron province!! cooool

ah wow!! it’s bigger than i realized *w*

watching a lightning storm from one of these towers is fucking terrifying

that lightning does Not fuck around

the maddening thing about this game is seeing so much cool shit in the distance and you can’t check it out yet, or it would be such hard work

i see some glowy shit and a giant pink tree and i wanna explore everything but also it’s so Much

it’s kind of creepy out here :/ maybe i want to go do story after all lol

im ging back to the shrine you hang glide off of so i can start from somewhere familiar >_>

idk why im so cautious playing this game. like. its a game. its not like it can hurt me

im having trauma flashbacks looking at eventide island

wait is this a

i hear town music!!! omg omg

PEOPLE ;_;

ohhhh my gosh what a beautiful peaceful beachside town

reminds me of bodhum/new bodhum and bits and piece of ff11, which i say with the greatest reluctance

i love everyone in this village just bc they are here

oh god it’s so beautiful i love beaches so much i want to live here

oh my gosh there’s a gerudo here!!!!!! OH MY GOD I HAVEN’T SEEN YOU SINCE MM TALK TO ME

she’s asleep in the inn lol

oh hey the painter dude is here too

some of these hylian npcs are poc which is so do cool and overdue

ooh a chest game

i lost lmao

OH MY GOD

the gerudo lady is awake and she is. so tall oh my god

im gay

i am Gay

I Am Gay

oh, man. oh man

are they all so beautiful. so Strong. good god

i wish this village was bigger i could have happily stayed here for hours

omg

someone a long time ago was standing on a mountain that looked like a broken heart and was like, is this not the place to find your soulmate…? but i haven’t found mine yet

someone mentioned a similar legend here and on the map i see a mountain with a whole heart on it pfffft

im so sick of seeing these stone cirlces everywhere…i can’t blow them up..what do you DO with them? complete the pattern maybe??

oh my god it worked

i’ve passed by so many…how will i ever get all these seeds……..

i know the game wants me to sail here but i hate sailing, it’s tedious, i want to control my boat with the fucking control stick

holy fuck dude the sword im using is so strong?? it cut down a palm in a single swipe!!

the longer i play the more i hate the blood moon

oh no i found a hinox

i was going to avoid him but he has an orb….

idk where it goes tho so there’s no point there’s no point the blood moon will bring him back okay Okay

hes a red one anyway so no big, when the time comes

oh my god ANOTHER hinox with an orb

i bet they go to the twin shrines near the village

but i’m supposed to find a tablet before i do that…….i don’t wanna skip another quest like the zora helm also thats a Long walk jesus christ

NNNONONONO GOD

GUARDIAN THAT CAN WALK OVER THERE NO FUCKING THANKS SO GLAD IT DIDN’T SEE ME

so fucking glad

exploring is so dangerous Why

why do i suck SO much at combat

oooh a bokoblin camp with a black mobiln :/ Yikes

aaand bomb arrows takes care of THAT

i love seeing farosh flying around here but i can NEVER CATCH HIM

i was just a few minutes too late to getting him at a really good spot

but the dragons seem to take the same route over 24h, so there’s that

oh hey im back at green cloud plateau

okay Um am i crazy or did i just hear something roar? was that the wind??

oh god i see a question mark from here something already knows im close

oh ogd oh god why i bet it’s big and awful

IT’S A LYNEL LOL

i dont have any healing or defense stuff no way

oh no i think there’s a shrine up there where he is ): but i can’t get it

AND A HINOX RIGHT NEXT TO HIM? NO THANKS LOL

jesus i knew i’d die here

at least there’s no orb on this one

oh noooo more lightning god the storms here are brutal

omg i found shelter behind a waterfall and there’s the shrine i was sensing!! yes!!!!!

holy fuck im not safe here either i nearly just got fried

in the shrine we go holy shit

may the weather be better when i get out

damn i keep finding ore today… #blessed

I SAW FAROSH AGAIN HE WAS SO CLOSE BUT I WAS STILL TOO SLOW…okay they DEFINITELY take the same route everyday i think

or at least if not at the same time, the same places

ugh i went over to this one place and the weather turned to all lightning forever

KASS? HOLY SHIT DUDE YOU’RE GONNA GET FRIED

im so glad to see him ;_; it’s creepy out here

uh…i think…i have to get struck by lightning…on this hill…oh my god i’ll die???

maybe my lightning rod will work……? please…………..?

aaaaand it did nothing. great. ok

/saves game

……../dons metal armor weapons and shield

LMAO IT WORKED HOLY SHIT

oh my god im alive!!!! i had mipha’s grace just in case but i took an electric elixir

jesus FUCK

yes nice i didnt even have to do anything just get the…chest…….

B R O

i got rubber tights!!! electric resistance!!!!! NICE

ah and when i came out the storm was over :3

but kass is gone ): i wanted to tell him i figured out his song!!!

i knew i should have talked to him before i went in :/

lol i find a boat after playing in the water for 100 years…..not that i wouldve used it, but

aw i met and saved a traveling couple, i’ve saved them before

oh my gosh a STABLE!! all the way out here!!!!

THERE ARE PEOPLE

man i wondered what that couple was doing out in such a remote place

oh wow beedle gave me a single ancient arrow…apparently it deals huge damage even to guardians

maybe this is what the start screen meant by the right tools!!!!

but there’s only one…

robbie from akkala gave it to him…NICE i’ll remember

ah some guy here said there was something glowing at the top of floria waterfall…i gotta check that out

ooh a shrine back here too…nice

god there’s a chest in here that’s REALLY hard to get bc camera angles but it has an ancient core (looked it up) and i need one to upgrade my runes………smh

man…nah. im out. there will be other cores & this is crazy ridiculous

its just the stasis rune anyway and i use that one the least

five big hearty radishes means TWENTY FIVE EXTRA HEARTS

but you can only have a max of 30 lol so

AAAH HERE COMES FAROSH AND IM FINALLY AHEAD OF WHERE HE’LL BE OH MY GOD

I HIT HIM I HIT HIM

I FINALLY GOT A SCALE

almost died for it but. i got it. he throws electricity involuntarily and it’s major stuff i shoulda worn my rubber gear

i kinda wanna wait and see if i can get another……..but i have shit to do

holy shit farosh came back around & i got another scale…wish i could hit his horn

AAAH NO A GIANT STONE THING IS HERE….i have no idea how to fight them im leaving

well idk if the stone thing or the dragon or the shrine was what was supposed to be glowing up here but i don’t see anything new

im almost done exploring this province, actually

gotta walk along one beach and climb the heart mountain and that’s it!

a little tempted to grab my horse since it’s such an easy direct road, but i’d be getting on and off all the time ):

fml there’s a guardian on this beach…pls dont move pls dont pls dont

oh thank god its stuck in the sand

omg there was a chest in the sand but it WASNT A CHEST it was one of those yellow octoroks!!!! but!! i shot it! and got money!!!!!!!! #nice

NOOOO another stone thing!!

but you know the last one took a lot of damage from one accidental bomb so maybe

how do you fight it?? i can’t damage it???

OH OMG THE ORE THING!!! OKAY LET’S DO THIS SHIT let’s go i cooked up so much good food

oh my god i took him down in just a handful of bomb arrows…THATS what ive been running from?

not nearly as scarly as lynel tbh

and i’ve been marking the minibosses on my map so now i can look for jewels there if i ever need to

i found a fuckton in this region but lol i sold them all

i know one great fairy needs 10k rupees and like…..Yikes

im getting pretty good with my bow, i can hit far off targets bc i know how high to aim and shit

i’ve kind of been wondering what happens if you get to the edge of the map

but the wind gets so strong on the beaches i bet you just either run out of stamina if swimming or can’t make the boat get past it if sailing

but what happens if you get to a land edge though…?

i actually dislike getting to edges of maps haha it creeps me out. that disreality unrealization shit. no thanks

in la noire the edges of the map have u-turn streets and you realize the cars are all just on one endless track and no one is in them and no one ever goes home and you start to wonder if this actual universe is a simulation and it freaks you out

anyway.

omfg someone from the yiga clan selling bananas like i actually could have bought some if i wanted LMAO

he actually had me fooled for a moment even though i know what npcs named “traveler” mean

why do they all give me bananas when they die anyway………whats going on with this.

oh my god this dude at the heart shaped pond is in love with this gerudo lady here. and like. same oh my god she’s so Big

but lol you can choose to say “yeah talk to her” or “nope, rival time!”

me: aggressively wants to flirt with the gerudo lady but not in a straight way

pls this cutscene was so cute

but she deserves better than a weirdo like this guy

he like, gave me a twenty, and she fussed at him for being stingy, so then he have me a hundred, and THEN

HE ASKED FOR HIS MONEY BACK LMFAO no way fucknuts

wow and with that im All Done with this province O:

i mean yeah i got quests and shrines to come back and do, but i’ve SEEN everything, yk

maybe now i’ll go up to death mountain haha i feel so slow ): i hope what i saw and did made up for my slow story progress

whoa this weapons guy said he’d remake mipha’s trident if i ever broke it!! what a relief

ah i finally figured out the shrine puzzle by zora’s domain…gotta give that thing a dragon scale. but i like my dragon scales too much so i won’t. maybe later

oh hey the death mountain region tower! that was easy

uhhh what…is that

oh my god a FLYING GUARDIAN are you KIDDING me??? why???????

and they’re everywhere! fantastic!!! my ass is DEAD

oh okay this region is called akkala

at least i get guardian arrows here eventually :|

oh my god ONE SAW ME FUCK

oh my god

I RAN UP TO THE TOWER AND IT’S COVERED IN THE BLIGHT

what is that thing crawling all over death mountain?!

what is happening OH my god!!! so much!! everything!!! all at once!!!!!!!!

wait

that’s the divine beast

oh my god

oh my god.

oh my god it’s so big but even still it looks tiny in comparison to the mountain, oh my god

omg it gets cold up here only at night?? omg

NO there’s a still guardian up here too ;_;

i’m gonna try to kill it!!! good first try it can’t move and there’s cover RIGHT here

second try really but im stronger now

now, i have bomb arrows and lightning rods

ok lightning rod does nothing, bomb arrows dont work in the rain, but i killed it with shock arrows!!

and it wasnt v hard bc i was behind cover the whole time lol

but like, with those arrows - i used maybe 9 or 10? and that was all i used, i threw a couple of bombs at it too i guess

now to figure out how i even get IN here w/ all this gunk…..

fuck a bokoblin near a cooking pot saw me and accidentally set itself on fire lmao

ok i can’t climb past the blight, i tried, but how the fuck do i get rid of it i dont see any eyeballs )))):

……………………….w ait

this bokoblin has a shield with the hylian crest on it. the HYLIAN crest

these ruins have the red carpet with the double line of gold on the side

i’m crying this was someplace special

i don’t know what it was bc it can’t be the temple of time or hyrule castle but it was someplace real i recognize the style of it so faintly and it’s COVERED IN BLIGHT

oh my god………..this is so Much

ah ok a beam fell when i shot the first eyeball and i was like why arent there anymore?? but apparently i can magnesis it

oh wow i found a piece of a room…….totally trashed, jesus christ

must’ve been a lab or library

omg its thundering outside…..that has nothing to do with zelda but it makes this creepier

THERE’S A GUARDIAN AT THE TOP SCARED THE SHIT OUT OF ME

its not alive tho thank christ

jesus fuck the divine beast is SO BIG and the mountain is still SO MUCH BIGGER i feel so tiny every time i look

anyway it’s 5am and there’s lightning so i gotta unplug for many reasons, this is a fine stopping place, can’t wait to get my ass kicked by that thing and rescue a goron, holy fuck

#loz blogging #botw spoilers #not too spoiler heavy bit a lil bit #personal #snap story incoming #this storm is gonna be a real humdinger #i worry all the time about my aunt's outdoor feral cat colony ):

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