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#originally tagged in may 2020 haha
emasdf · 10 months
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sims tag
Thanks for the tag @cantseemtohide 🤗 My queue ran out so this is a perfect time to answer some sims questions!
1. What’s your favourite sims death? Old age 💔
2. Alpha CC or Maxis Match? Maxis Match
3. Do you cheat when your sims gain weight? Not really. I have used the insta-lean potion once, that’s kind of cheating? But it made that sim way too thin!
4. Do you use move objects? I don’t do anything too crazy with it but I have it on by default with betterbuildbuy
5. Favorite mod? I don’t like to play without sim spawn overhaul or selective auto chat
6. First expansion/game/stuff pack you got? Livin’ it up 👵 I have always bought all expansions so I believe for TS4 it was Get to Work
7. Do you pronounce “live mode” like aLIVE or LIVing? aLIVE
8. Who’s your favorite sim that you’ve made? I think Poppy is my favorite. She is super cute and I’m playing autonomy off now so she is not annoying
9. Have you made a simself? I’ve tried...!
10. What sim traits do you give yourself? Vegetarian, childish and loner
11. Which is your favorite EA hair color? Cheese 🧀
12. Favorite EA hair? The short one from my first pet
13. Favorite life stage? Teen
14. Are you a builder or are you in it for the gameplay? When I get bored or annoyed with the gameplay I switch to build mode. I love to build community lots but I’m not very good at building houses
15. Are you a CC creator? No... I wish I knew how to update some broken abandoned mods but I have zero patience for failure
16. Do you have any simblr friends/a sim squad? I’m so antisocial I don’t really know anyone. I try to show my support by liking and reblogging and if I feel really social I may leave a comment haha
17. What’s your favorite game? (1, 2, 3, or 4) 2 was so special to me but as I don’t have it anymore I have to say 4
18. Do you have any sims merch? No
19. Do you have a YouTube for sims? No
20. How has your “sim style” changed throughout your years of playing? I don’t know, I guess my style changes all the time...? I get bored quite easily
21. What’s your Origin ID? emasdf
22. Who’s your favorite CC creator? @/wildlyminiaturesandwich
23. How long have you had a simblr? I had one in 2020 that I deleted. This one I’ve had a year or so
24. How do you edit your pictures? I use reshade to adjust brightness and colors and then gimp or canva to crop and add stuff
25. What expansion/game/stuff pack do you want next? More hobbies! I couldn’t care less about cars but if we ever get them I hope it will be some kind of garage pack so you could also build and upgrade cars and start a garage band and decorate a man cave with a pool table
26. What expansion/game/stuff pack is your favorite so far? I have nothing bad to say about nifty knitting 🧶
I’ll tag @crazydictator, @jasesims, @sims4-premades and @mdianasims. Feel free to ignore if you already did this or just don’t want to 🙂
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writingforevren · 1 year
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 Hi there, I'm Evren or Ren or Ev- or whatever you wanna call me, honestly totally down for funky nicknames haha. This is my writeblr intro and here's some random stuff about me and the things that I do so you can decide whether you hate me or like me. I’ve been on writeblr since 2020 but just moved across the country this year for the first time so I was inactive for awhile. This is the blog for you if you’re LGBT+, A Writer, or Neurodivergent (or maybe all of the above)
About Me:
I’m chaotic af so please don’t expect regular posts my mental health is unpredictable
I’m 17 at the time of writing this.
I'm here, and I'm Queer, Asexual, Gay, Gender-flux, Transmasc, Grey-romantic, probably among others, I'm trying to collect all of the letters and colors of the rainbow if you couldn't tell.
I'm on the autism spectrum, also ADHD so yeah my brain is a bit of a cluttered but organized mess, this is also why I may disappear from the internet for months at a time and why this is the only social media I can somewhat keep up with.
I play & DM dnd games, I mostly dm comedy/horror stories that I’ve written- haven’t played for a bit though because creating a consistent group is nearly impossible.
Also very much into witchy shit, a tarot card a day keeps the depression away and crystals keep me sane.
I'm totally down for tag games
I enjoy writing fiction although I tend to get burned out easily after writing long projects, you'll see some of my writing posted on here, no clue how often. I also occasionally write fanfiction and poetry though not much.
The genres I generally tend to write have themes of LGBTQ+, mental health, romance, urban fantasy, dark imagery, comedy, horror, coming of age, mind-bending, dreamy, etc.
I also hate plot twists- PLOT TWIST I love them and you will see plenty of them in any and all of my writing.
I love reading others works and if you do too I have a seperate blog dedicated to reblogging other works of fiction @original-writing
Here's a list of my current hyperfixations that I have taken some inspiration from for my stories also if I write fanfic it will most likely be one of these things - Ghibli movies my favorite being Spirited Away | Coraline | Scream | It 2016/Chapter 2 | Gravity Falls | Helluva Boss | Hazbin Hotel | Stranger Things | Arcane | Thirteen Reasons Why | What we do in the Shadows | Our Flag Means Death | Good Omens | The Nevers | The Midnight Club | I Am Not Okay With This | A Series of Unfortunate Events | The End of the F***ing world | BBC’s Sherlock | The Addams Family | Life is Strange | Little Nightmares | Scott Pilgrim | The Seven Realms
My ask box is always open to anyone if you have a question or just wanna chat.
My Writing:
I had more WIPS but have broken this down to the ones that are active. I try to keep the descriptions vague because I don't want to give much away, it's more of a vibe if you will. I am going to be redoing all of the WIP intros so that’s why there aren’t any links currently. Also the writing posted in the tags is a bit outdated since I’ve updated a lot of the stories but I didn’t want delete old posts. I’ll hopefully try to drown it out with new writing. For now here’s a new tag for writing I’ll do from now on If you’d like to be added to the taglist for any of these projects let me know.
Rainclouds 
Rain clouds, y'know those little thoughts that seem to pester you mind when you try to convince yourself that everything is fine? yeah that's what this story is about. LGBT+ students in a small town of britain dealing with that voice coming to life as a shadow in their minds. Bittersweet and full of twists and turns. Dark imagery meets slow-burn romance that's seemingly destined for failure. Shattered glass, shattered thoughts, but maybe there is a way to clear the rain, to let someone in. But what if letting them in is what leads to the bridge collapse?
Intro | Playlist | Writing Tag 
Stormclouds 
Another side of the rainclouds story. A darker side of the story. A friendship lost throughout time but one side still painfully obsessed with the idea of that coming back. Putting on a fake smile to fend off the storm that has already overtaken them, the world that has already decided it doesn't want them there. Full of wonderful fantasies and ideas but those fantasies turning into nightmares as everything seems to go wrong in every way. The mirror never matched, the stories never finished, and worst of all the lights were starting to flicker.
Intro | Writing Tag
Rainy Grove
A forest full of secrets, a place where the sun never seems to come out even in the dead of summer. Haunted perhaps? Who's to know what resides deep in those woods that everyone is warned not to wander into. Once you go in you never come out. But when one bored girl decides it would be fun to take her friend on a hike into the woods to see what really lays beneath. They come to realize that it's not ghosts at all rather seemingly friendly people with very sharp teeth. Full of twists and turns, dark imagery, and characters that turn out not to be black and white as originally believed.
Intro | Writing Tag
Dissociated
It was normal to experience voices in your head, giving you advice, telling you what's right and what's wrong right? At least that's what he'd believed most of his life, even as a child the one thing he remembered was a friend, a friend who didn't actually exist but rather hugged him from the inside and gave him words of hope. But now he was in University where the things that used to only happen sometimes had gotten much worse. The memory blanks, the coming to in places he didn't even remember going, friends talking about conversations they'd had when he hadn't seen them for weeks. It was all getting out of hand, racing through the endless maze in his own head had gotten so much worse. He needed to find a way out, Just a door, something, something that could tell him what was wrong with him.
Intro | Writing Tag
Eldenstow Creek
A drive through the empty roads of the countryside, along the edge of the woods and away from everything they'd once known. Sounds nice right? well not when you're running from something, something far more sinister than what they were about to encounter. The world was not as it seemed, there was another side, a side where strangeness & evil resided. Circuses popping out of seemingly nowhere, pools of mystical water trying to pull them in, unintended consequences after trying to fight this higher power. Everything had seemed normal but then they’d made one mistake, messed with the wrong person, spilled the blood of something they never should've. So yeah. They were in the same car and driving along the edge of the woods. Nothing to it.
Intro | Playlist |  Writing Tag
Fanfiction | My Ao3  
Skull Rock (Stranger Things Steddie Fanfic) | Read Full On Ao3
Even after everything Steve Harrington was still obsessing over the idea of Nancy Wheeler. Robin kept trying to match him with other girls but it was never right, no matter who he went out with it didn’t work. It didn’t click. But then the dead man walking, Eddie Munson stepped into his life again. Someone he could just talk to, someone who shared the same experiences, Someone who felt just as alone as he did- Well maybe more considering Eddie wasn’t really able to go outside since he was still a ‘serial killer’
In Conclusion
If you made it this far I’m impressed, If you wanna see more from me feel free to give me a follow, if you’re a writer I’d love to be mutuals and I’ll see you sometime soon. This post will continue to be edited and updated as I work on updating my blog. I probably won’t post too much but we’ll see.
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askalby · 2 years
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hi, i just saw your sponsored post and scrolled through your blog a bit, but i still haven't really understood what am mlp ask blog is
if you don't mind, may i ask you a few questions ?
is the blog/graveyard under the tree the first mlp ask blog ?
when did this start ? when did you start your blog ?
no need to answer this if you don't want to, but what made you stop and then what made you return ?
for some reason seeing all your comics and the responses to them is making me nostalgic and i don't even know what for
Sure! There's a lot of nuancey-details that I'll probably leave out for sake of time, but I'll try to summarise my answers as much as possible. Is the blog/graveyard under the tree the first mlp ask blog ? - The blog under the tree is Ask Surprise, one of the top ask blogs around the 2011/2012 era. Surprise was huge back in the day, but was more specifically my favourite, and what inspired me to draw my stinky recolor in the first place! There's really no particular reason she's the center of the graveyard, aside from the fact she means a lot to me. As Alby put it, she was THE best! When did this start ? When did you start your blog? - The first MLP ask blog started around late 2010 I believe, with most of the founders starting up in 2011. Albino Pie specifically was created May 25th, 2012. What made you stop and then what made you return? - The reason I stopped and inevitably killed her off is pretty complicated, and involves a lot of personal details. To keep it brief, around 2013/2014 ask blogs and mlp in general started to die down quite a lot, and cringe-culture was starting to grow rapidly, causing many artists to abandon their blogs in favour of more original creations, and anything that wouldn't make them a laughingstock of their peers. This, combined from the trauma set on by a toxic group of friends that I had at the time inevitably lead me to pull the plug. I went off to start making more original works, completely refusing to acknowledge my involvement with MLP or the ask blog in general for a very long time. Fast forward to 2020, which marked the 10 year anniversary of Friendship Is Magic. There was a sudden surge and wave of nostalgia, which caused a lot of old creators to come back, me included. I finally came to accept I never truly hated the character, and always did want to continue drawing her and finish the blog one day. Growing older you quickly learn that life is simply too short to be embarrassed by the things you love to create/enjoy, and I regret falling into that hole in the first place. For some reason seeing all your comics and the responses to them is making me nostalgic and i don't even know what for! - That's awesome! I'm glad It's able to resonate with people who don't even have the slightest clue as to what's going on haha. There's lots of history around Ask Blogs, so I would definitely try checking out some of the one's I've tagged in my posts.
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sherbet-shark · 2 years
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The Ashengrotto Family Theory
  So you thought this was the last you’d see of Sherbet Shark’s crazed rambles HAHA. You assumed wrong, but now, I have other friends to help me, @rrasado, @hey-its-cweepy, hence the tiny squid in the right-hand corner and @luvielle
   This post is mainly speculation and, again, a theory. We do not intend these mad rambles to be seen as canon by fellow fans or content creators; these are just us brainstorming. By making this post, we have no intention to create hate for the yet-to-be-introduced side characters, mainly Azul’s parental roles (Mother, Father, and Step-father) and Azul’s Grandma. Again this is speculation and theories we concluded.  You can discuss this with us on our respective Tumblr blogs about this theory.
Tagging: @pianostarinwonderland​ here's the family theory- 
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Sources Used: twist-archive’s Azul birthday story, Jade and Floyd Leech’s various card stories and chats, Spoilers for Floyd’s Birthday Boy Card, The Little Mermaid (lore), The Little Mermaid 2: Return to the Sea (lore), and The Little Mermaid 3: Ariel’s Beginnings (lore), Encanto (lore), The Little Mermaid by Christian Hans Anderson, Chapter Three information, Eng Twist and JPN Twist.
Trigger Warnings: Spoilers for Chapter Three, Speculation, Azul’s Birthday Card spoilers, Divorce (Azul’s Mom and father), Speculated familial pressure, Speculated cheating, Speculated Generational Abuse (Azul’s Grandma to Azul’s Mom), Speculated Azul’s Mom’s low-self esteem, Speculated brutal living of Northern Coral Sea, Speculated overfeeding and Speculated Parental Negligence
Word Count: 3.8k
While this following theory is not as concrete as my previous collaborative theory, we (Rras and I) still found it highly intriguing to theorize about the possible family dynamics and respective histories of Ashengrotto family members and their personalities. As of 2020 and onward, the JPN and the original version of Twisted Wonderland released the “Birthday Boy” cards and expanded on the Twist boy’s lore of their respective homelands and their families. These are ideas of what Azul’s Mother and his grandmother are like personality-wise and a wide variety of options we had developed in our discord server.
In Azul’s 1st Birthday card, we learn more about his hobbies, family, and more lore on their character. Yuu asks the dorm leader about any family the Octomer has, and Azul proudly states that he has a mother, a grandmother, and a step-father.  He later on, goes on to say that all the members of his family have magical powers, but his grandmother is particularly powerful. Azul doesn’t seem to be one to flaunter useless praise for his family, and he does seem genuine in his pride in his family and respects them. While Azul says that his mother has some magical ability, we can see Azul highlights his grandmother’s utter power, warmly praising his step-father.
The below points are the two of us making points of our ideas and evidence to solidify them. The different emojis and colored fonts mean the different authors. The crescent moon is Rras -> “🌘” , while I, Sherbet, am the shark emoji ->  “🦈” 
Also the italicized font with both of our emojis together is us giving unprofessional commentary xDD
First up, we have Point A, which is Rras’ department!
A. Azul’s Mother resembles Morgana, Ariel, and/or Governess Del Rey
       《🌘》There’s a very vague theme among the overblot victim’s families, how most, if not all, mirror the hero’s family in their respective series. (Riddle and Alice’s mothers, Leona and Simba’s fathers, Azul and Ariel’s initially single parents, Jamil and Jasmine’s parents forbidding them, Vil and Snow White’s fathers, etc.). In this post we’ll be focusing on Azul’s case, wherein his mother may be similar to Ariel (with the assumption of the grandmother being Ursula and Triton to be further elaborated on later on in this post.). We know for a fact that his family has many great magic users, but his grandmother is the most renowned in that department. Being the daughter of an infamous figurehead will, of course, affect how you’re raised. We thought of what if Ashen Mother was pressured by her mother to study hard, improve her magic, and help everyone- think of Encanto. 
     Now I’d like to bring attention to Azul’s mention of how Octopus mer were rare in arc 3 (38). It implied the octi presence in the sea population around that area, so this may bring in the possible scenario of how the Grandmother may also have partially pressured the Mother into finding fellow octopus merfolk to be with. Here is where the Ariel connection presents itself. Suppose the Mother had been gaslighted into this convoluted idea of love where it became more objective than subjective. What do you think she’d feel towards the first octopus merman who showed some sort of interest in her? The same way prince Eric had unknowingly entranced a young hopeful Ariel with his antics on that ship.
But Azul specifically stated in the TWST EN translation that “Betentecled mermen like myself aren’t common around these parts,” emphasizing these parts. Based on the map shown in the sequel to the Little Mermaid, when Morgana gave Melody a map to Atlantica, I believe that they live farther from where Azul went to school as a child. (that and they mentioned the ice that fosters on the water during winter “up north”). Suppose we spare a glance towards the ice lair in the sequel. It bridges us to our following speculation, Ashengrotto’s Mother is Morgana.
We’ve seen talks around the fandom about how Azul may be more like Morgana or how someone else in the Ashengrotto bloodline may stand in as the twisted incarnate of Ursula’s overlooked sister. So to compare Azul’s supposedly infamous mother, who owns an equally renowned ristorante in the depths, to Morgana seems far-fetched, right? Let’s go back to what he says about her in his first birthday interview.
“My mother is the one who operates the restaurant. In the beginning, she ran it herself, and it started small… When I could understand more about my surroundings, the restaurant had already grown to employ a large staff of professionals and became the most famous restaurant in the Coral Sea.”
《🌘》We can already speculate many things based on this one answer alone. One is that Azul’s mother had started her business before or when Azul was born. Second is the possible background to this business. Let’s say she was pressured. She’d had to have some sort of coping mechanism as an escape. What if it was cooking? It started as a pastime, something her mother can’t outright criticize since it was, for the most part, harmless (and even beneficial if we assume they really did originate up north where food may or may not have been scarce.). Morgana hated being criticized, so connecting her to Ashengrotto’s Mother, who finally had an outlet she could safely call her own, meant she finally did something for herself. This business grew and grew until word of the ristorante had spread all over the area, reaching the Coral Sea’s ends.
Suppose Azul's words are to be trusted, and their family really does house many great magic users. In that case, I can only assume the Grandmother constantly compares her Mother to their relatives who display a great attitude toward the art. We can tie all this to Morgana representing her life growing up, Ariel representing her love life, but what about motherhood?
I momentarily turn our attention towards Governess Del Rey from The Little Mermaid: Ariel's beginning, someone who yearns for something more yet can't go due to their position and constant words from a higher part (Sebastian). It’s like a balance between the two aforementioned ladies wrapped into one. We know she met Azul's stepfather during the divorce process, yet, what of the time before that? Surely she's already begun to feel some sort of loss towards her child's other parent, but unlike King Triton- she took that responsibility for herself. 
     Azul greatly respects his mother, but unlike every other Overblot Victim who had mentioned and even showcased their immediate family within their memorial flashbacks, only Azul became the exception. Why so? Perhaps it has to do with negligence. You'd think she'd be there to comfort her son who's being bullied, but we have to remember that, around this time, her Ristorante is beginning to be famous. The stepfather is a lawyer, so the lack of presence in his OB memories may have had something to do with the Mother's own negligence experience, which will be further expanded by the next point below.
B. Azul’s Grandmother resembles Ursula and King Triton
     《🦈》Now, you may be wondering where I got to this point in theorizing. Well, admittedly, we do have sparse information about the matriarch. We know that Azul has impressive prowess with her magical ability and “graciously” helps out her neighbors just like her grandson, and perhaps he learned from her and the Great Sea Witch’s “compassionate” actions. It could be plausible for him to draw inspiration from his grandmother and a literal historical figure that he admires, as seen at the end of chapter three. Azul admires the Great Sea Witch’s ability as he draws upon their similarities in the past yet different techniques for coping with their histories.
As seen in the previous point, we can assume that Azul’s grandmother is a prideful, theatrical, arrogant woman that’s confident in her powers and herself, much like Ursula. But to this, we see a softer side to the con-woman, as seen in her relationship with her eels. We believe that Grandmother possibly was brought up, and the mindset she grew to have, and her overall personality, had ultimately created a distance between her daughter and herself.
As seen in the previous point made by Rras and the canon information we have, his grandmother is strong, perhaps stronger than her grandson. Due to her presence as a strong witch, she had garnered a reputation and, if our theory is correct, thrived on it but possibly felt pressured by her neighbors and her ideals. Perhaps Grandmother felt the need to push her daughter to extremes to help the community, much like how Abuela pushed her family to the brink. The constant drive for perfection not only as herself but maybe as a representative of the Oct-merpeople. From the previous point and via canon information in Chapter Three, part 38, in the central Coral Sea, Octo-merpeople are scarce, but what if that’s the case across the sea?
Maybe grandmother felt the need to show her fellow merfolk that they are good. We do not know that Great Seven is universally seen and recognized as good figures from other nonplayable characters. All we know is that the Great Seven, in the eyes of the prominent cast members their influential and are not necessarily seen as good. Back to Grandma Ashengrotto.
Her overwhelming demeanor and status created a vast shadow her daughter was trapped in due to other variables. She was unable for the mother-daughter duo to properly understand one another, much like how King Triton couldn’t understand his daughter Ariel. One of these variables is that Grandmother and daughter have different hobbies, preferences, and possibly a vast difference in their magical prowess. The mother is most likely loving, well-known among the masses, and has no problems conducting her magic. While I believe that Azul’s mother doesn’t have strong magic compared to her son or mother and is the daughter of a renowned be someone that isn’t as remarkable. Sounds familiar? 
   This dynamic is reminiscent of Mirabel's overall experience and dynamic with her family. Her family and the community initially perceive Mirabel as magicless because her other family members are blessed with gifts. Shining stars, if you will, while Mirabel didn’t have any. As we can see, the young girl wants to prove herself to everyone and implies low self-esteem because she was taught that her powers would determine her worth, much like how her sisters, Lusia, most notably. But still, despite her daughter’s speculated lack of being a powerhouse. Grandmother forced ideals on her daughter either of her protective stances over their Octomermaid status or as a parent.
One such thought that occurred to Rras and I was that maybe Grandmother had an arranged marriage to a fellow Octomerman with the idea of procreating with their kind. It is not as far-fetched because if we look at the mentioned information, it would be a logical yet pessimistic way to look for ‘love.’ If this is a fact, maybe this promised couple had met before. Azul’s mother ‘fell in love with him because of what she saw and not him as a person and the fact her mother told her daughter she must marry a fellow oct-mer to keep their bloodline strong and their overall population numbers tame. Mayhaps the grandmother had organized this marriage and told her daughter these fanciful details, making the naive yet tired daughter believe them, and when they met, Azul’s mother fell in ‘love’ with him.
《🦈》But perhaps, Azul’s mother would commonly swim to the surface to gather the ingredients for her hobby. The Octavinelle Trio has informed us that living up north is brutal, so the idea that food was also scarce. Mother’s adventures made Grandma tight grip with every secret because she feared losing her daughter and exposing herself to humans. Once more, we do not know if respect for the merpeople was universal among humans, other races, and vice versa.
We also have concluded that it’s in the realm of possibility that Azul’s mother, while she was young, swam away from home up north, where Azul says that’s where they live. Mother couldn’t stand the pressure of being the “let down daughter,” her own mother’s pushed ideals, and being unable to connect as two people for their respective desires.
Encanto and the Little Mermaid have already been spoken for and connected to our theory. 2021’s movie, Encanto, shows the reputation of this family was stressful. Thus, the matriarch pushes everyone to have unhealthy ideals and push their desires to the wayside. In Disney’s The Little Mermaid, King Triton is strong-willed, fiery-tempered, and protective yet caring for his family, as seen in this franchise branch. The king of the sea demands from his royal courtier. The sea dragon announces that he doesn’t know where the youngest princess is, nor does he know where her guardian, Sebastian is.
As the movie concludes, the king sees firsthand that his daughter is happy with Eric and utterly in love, and she is with the human. His hate and displeasure quickly dissipate, showing his parent development from the beginning to the end and Encanto’s Abuela. Suggesting that the supposed damage and pressure on Azul’s mother is still instilled in her, but their relationship is now somewhat stable after many trials and tribulations.
C. Azul’s Paternal side
      《🦈》We don’t know much about Azul’s biological father in canon. The dorm leader says he can’t remember his father either due to being too young or being protected from his father by his heartbroken mother. Still, basing the Encanto example between Mariano and his father’s two male side characters. We have theorized that his father was also an Octomerman and in the arranged marriage by possibly other family members for the idea of procreating. Perhaps, we think his family told him too many good things about his future wife, and he too was led to this artificial love, and whilst on paper, the coupling was perfect and did produce an Octo-merchild, wasn’t ‘true love,’ or the chance is that it was never there. 
      This lack of love may have led to an affair on his part. From the source material and its darker original tale, we have concluded that Azul’s father cheated. The prince is, as Christan Han Anderson wrote, the prince and his betrothed, the unnamed princess, as a genuinely in love couple, with the young princess as a kind, innocent, and very in love with the prince. At the same time, she doesn’t mind the relationship the prince and the mermaid have, in stark contrast to Disney’s version, with Vanessa’s mean-spiritedness, vanity, and jealousy. We’re not sure what we prefer, but we know that his background and reasoning are not right no matter what. While it may help us understand, it doesn’t make things better than what he did.
《🌘》Perhaps the affair took place during a time the biological father was being greatly pressured from all sides. We can only loosely speculate what Azul’s biological father was like and his father’s family. One can even word it as him drowning in the pressure, similarly to how his fiancee and then future wife were also being pushed. Being smothered with the idea of a perfect pair, he most likely tried to step away for a single moment, just a short period of freedom away from the dictative people around him, much like Prince Eric. The latter deliberately chose to celebrate his birthday on the ship because he knew what sort of restraint he'd face once he was back home. 
   The pressure pulled him deeper and deeper, and as much as the Ashengrotto Mother tried to help him as someone in the same position as him in this arranged love. He saw someone else giving him a long-due peace; based on the original tale, he saw another woman sweet and caring whom he soon eventually fell in love with. Unlike the artificially cultivated "love" He had with the Mother, this one felt real, real enough for him to quite literally abandon ship and go with this other woman despite the already formed family he had with the Ashengrotto.
《🦈》Onto Azul’s step-father, we had learned through Azul’s Union Birthday card that his step-dad is a lawyer and that his mother had met him when she was filing for divorce. As we’ve said before in this post, his step-father is intelligent and quick-witted but treats Azul’s mother well with love and respect, and the young boy respects him. For some reason, their meeting reminds me, Sherbet, of how in real life, Maria Reynolds and Aaron Burr met
(《🦈》Yes, we’re Hamilton nerds. Deal with it /J 《🌘》Does this make Mama Ashen Eliza?-/LHJ).
《🦈》 While this duo did not marry and was strictly a business relationship. I found a funny connection between the two. His step-father isn’t mentioned anymore, but Rras and I believe his step-father is a regular merman rather than an Octomerman, as we speculate. Grandmother didn’t want her daughter to marry, much like how King Triton’s attitude changed at the end of The Little Mermaid.
   Perhaps originally, Grandmother still wanted her daughter to be with her first husband but then saw how incredibly happy her daughter was with this merman, explaining why Azul doesn’t have any siblings. Among the reasons that they’re both busy people with high-stress jobs and raising a son. Cross-breeding from different species could be very dangerous for his mother to try to have another child or look with a lighthearted lens. They were satisfied with having Azul and felt they wanted to slow down and focus on their respective occupations.
“He is a kind and honest man at heart, but when it comes to his work, he’s sharp as a tack. He often teaches me about law and contracts. And he has a wonderful relationship with my mother. He is a very respectable stepfather.” – Azul Ashengrotto’s Birthday Boy Card.
(《🌘》Addams Family dynamic??? /LH 《🦈》YUS.)
D. The problem child himself– Azul Ashengrotto
   《🦈》 Azul Ashengrotto is the most fleshed-out character within this post, as we all know. But, still, I do find it an interesting idea that possibly, as Rras has illuminated in her first point that perhaps, Mother Ashengrotto knew of her negligent actions toward her son and didn’t wish for a drift like how her mother and herself experienced. Showing off the one thing she’s truly proud of is feeding him a lot of food to show her love and if food gathering is, as we speculate is, scarce, this can be taken as an ultimate show of love.
      I would also like to add that Mother Ashen’s inactions may not have been on purpose and as things stacked up for her. His mother’s events, discovering her crumbling marriage, managing her ristorante, raising a son, family bonds, and slowly falling in true love with a merman that loves all of her. I do not want to defend her potentially harmful and neglect her son, but I find it vital to see the situation through these theorized lenses.
  As we know from Chapter three, we see that Azul had been mercilessly bullied by his fellow peers, and to our knowledge, at least, the teachers either didn’t see this or didn’t care to come to his aid. But we also know that his mother owning a ristorante had made him in tune with food preparation and a keen tongue from his step-father’s hardworking job as a lawyer. Azul, however, does state in his card stories and his Birthday interview that his mother is interested in the Mostro Lounge and that Azul doesn’t like his family’s eatery. Maybe, his mother is competitive with her son to the degree that he’s not sure if his mother wants to take over for herself, or perhaps he has too many bad memories of eating too much and being bullied there.
As Rras has stated, perhaps his mother’s negligence also plays into this displeasure? But again, this may beg the question, if Azul praises his step-father so much in his Union Card, wouldn’t it be logical to assume that he’d try to make his stepson comfortable and safe? Well, I, Sherbet, believe I have the answer.  Because of his job as a lawyer and need to adjust to his new life, he’d also tried to make his stepson comfortable, but we don’t know their whole dynamic and if it’s formal and perhaps awkward on his step-father’s part? Azul does say that he respects his relationship with his mother and him as a person not, particularly as a parental figure.
《🌘》That same possible negligence is likely what led to the lack of parental presence during his memory flashbacks after his overblot. As I’ve pointed out in the first segment of this post, Azul is unique to the rest of the Overblot victims due to not showcasing immediate family within his memories, which- honestly felt off considering how the family of the movies’ heroes (Ariel and Melody).  Along with Ursula and Morgana (sibling jealousy), all still tied to the greater matter, and yet why is it that the one person with a supposedly good respectable relationship with both present parents didn’t appear in his most vulnerable moments?
Sherbet had speculated that it might’ve been for show. Personally, I believe this was plausible considering how seemingly blunt the Mother is with her child. Speaking from my own experience- my own Mother tries to tell her not-so-good experiences in hopes of me learning from her, so what if this was the case with the Ashengrotto family? Let’s hypothetically picture a now-grown Azul finally hearing of his mother’s experience with love and the likes, both to her own mother and her marital status.
As her only child, Azul doesn’t seem to want to add to that unfortunate history of hers, so for the sake of his own mother’s happiness, he tries his best to get along with the man that made her happy, sure it may not be a close, warm father-son bond but he definitely succeeded in not instigating bad blood among their family. Azul has shown to care for her and, by extension, the rest of his family, one he’s proud to be a part of regardless, as stated in his first birthday interview.
《🦈》 I can also attest to my parents advising me of their histories of heartache in hopes that I would not fall for their mistakes and as a lesson for me to learn. When I ask about their personal lives before, they’re quite open with their experiences. Another interesting tidbit is that while Azul seems indifferent to his mother’s business, he genuinely cares for the staff members working at his mother’s establishment when he receives a picture of them smiling and happy staff. Azul’s Union Birthday story card hints at a possible deeper relationship with the people working there. Floyd’s Birthday Boy card story says that Azul cares about his staff’s appearances at the Lounge and how he presents himself if there isn’t anyone around. Azul couldn’t care less about what his Octavinelle Students do, and he could’ve picked up this habit from his mother’s demeanor.
That’s all of our rambles. Thank you for reaching the end of our theory post, and we hope that this has been a fun read and a way to think of the Ashengrotto Family! We hope you have a great day or evening, and please check out our respective blogs for more content!!
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hdsouta · 1 year
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↺ ... INTRODUCING : TRAINEE 093 ; ITO SOUTA .
𝐑𝐎𝐎𝐊𝐈𝐄 𝐃𝐀𝐓𝐀𝐁𝐀𝐒𝐄 ▸ BORN ON MAY 11, 2003 IN NAGASAKI, JAPAN. SIGNED EXTENDED TRAINEE CONTRACT UNDER 𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐈𝐂 ON AUGUST 2020. NOTABLE SKILLSET(S) INCLUDE DANCE / VISUAL.
penned by bon for hydra labels.
CHECK OUT HIS STATS, PLAYLIST, AND PINTEREST.
hi everyone! i go by bon! i'm 25, in the est, he/she/they, and a full time student with a full time job. still, i'm sure i can be around a lot if not enough ok... also feel free to follow me on pinterest and i will follow back haha also ignore how ugly and messy my whole account is because i have too many FUUUUcking muses. thanks! i will also eventually have a playlist on spotify so tune in for that ok.
anywho, i'm here to introduce my new bean, ito souta, who i made specifically for this rp on a whim because i really wanted to join it... i've been eyeing it for a few days, so i'm so glad i got in today! well, i'll go ahead and write some stuff about him below:
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basic stats.
full name: ito souta.
nicknames: soda.
age: nineteen.
birthday: may 11th, 2000.
gender: male, he/him.
quick personality tl;dr. (very original, i know.)
positive traits: supportive, cheesy, loyal.
negative traits: ruthless, vulgar, pressuring.
likes: dancing, music in general (specifically pop punk and hip hop stuff), sports (specifically basketball), pvp video games, uhm idk yall this is hard CRIES
in general, i like to think that souta is very egotistical yet somehow also very charismatic and outgoing. he probably gets annoying when he gets too far up his own ass, but it's how he deals with the hard work he puts in to be an idol without results (or so he thinks). he finds himself losing a bit of hope every new day because he's been doing this shit for so long... and with an injury he got when he had just started training, which almost impacted his future career.
in some of his very first few weeks of being accepted into the company, he fell on his shoulder doing rec activities during some down time (or however it works lmao), which gave him an injury he had to basically force himself to work through. due to this, it's definitely not healed right, but it's good enough in order to keep him thriving in the company and working towards his debut. still, it hurts on and off, and he tries his own physical therapy for it, but you know, it be hard sometimes ya feel.
uhmmm... i think otherwise he's a hotshot. i like to think he's the one that's always searched up on pinterest or when people scroll the profiles of groups, they always stop to double take him. that's part of his ego ish, because he knows he's hot shit and people turn heads at his appearance. it sometimes gets in the way of his logical thinking, but you know, he's a kid... so what do you expect?
on another note that i wanted to mention... he used to want to be a basketball player, and if he didn't go into the idol industry, he would have 100%
i'm kind of just spewing stuff and i think i will either edit this or make a new like info post whenever i get some real solid shit for him!!!
otherwise, i will say a little bit about me. i am 25, in the est tmz, prefer he or they pronouns, and you can call me bon or bonbon. the loml is ateez, and i would d*e for them in a heartbeat. i also love block b, omega x, and a few other groups. i'm always open to talking about things even if they aren't rp related! if you'd like to add me on discord, just lmk <3 i can give you my tag!
i'm going to get some FOOD now because i'm hungry and then i will reply to people as well as fish around a bit more. i can't wait to write with everyone and please excuse me if i seem a little off or don't understand jlskdf it's been a hot minute since i've been on tumblr to rp as well as been in an idol group (it's been YEARS since this one).
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mystxmomo · 2 years
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THIS IS GOING TO BE SO SAPPY BUT.
Seeing the crumbs of unpublished sctdm here, was NOT something I was expecting to see today. And this may be a bit a cringe, but I want to thank you. Tht fic had such a grip on me in 2020 😭 I remember one day on august of 2020 I just decided to browse the kamukoma tag on ao3 even though I had only ever read stuff involving v3 before that day, and I found your fic. And your writing trapped me in a kamukoma hyperfixation and I fucking read all your kamukoma fic and stalked your tumblr for more kamukoma content and I was just OBSESSED.
and I was like abt to fall out of interest with danganronpa before I read your fic too, but I ended up falling right back into danganronpa hell after binge-reading all of the chapters you had uploaded at the time without a single break in just a few hours. and I ended up making a lot of friends and stuff due to my huge interest in danganronpa 😭 and it was all thanks to that fic. I’ve been a HUGE fan of your work ever since and I just wanna thank you for creating something so amazing and something so beloved to me (haha sorry I’m being a bit cringy right now. It just made me so happy to see a bit of content regarding the fic today and it just made me ..nostalgic? In a way.)
THIS.... is not cringe at all. This is incredibly sweet. These are the kind of comments that keeps people writing. Like holy shit??? Fandom is honestly an incredibly powerful thing like that. It's genuinely amazing how many connections can be made through it. And hearing that a fic I worked on out of mostly impulse throughout 2020 touched you like it did?? It genuinely does mean a lot to me.
Nostalgic... It's so fucking weird to me that 2020 was 2 years, coming on three by this point. It IS nostalgic by this point, isn't it? I was feeling it when I was poking through the document trying to figure out what parts I wanted to slip to people.
Anyway. You've inspired me. I have got to finish the zine I'm working on for the Identity V fandom, but I think... after that, I'm going to probably cobble up the remaining bits I have on the document and give the fic a send off it deserves. I'll probably cut the finish mark off at 21 chapters like originally planned, but I will wrap it up nice and neat.
Genuinely, thank you so much for this kind message ;; It really means a lot to hear stuff like this. Even a few fandoms out from Danganronpa, SCTDM is such a cornerstone of my works. Thank you for sticking around for so long, and shit, hopefully you enjoy the new shit I keep pumping out as much as you did SCTDM
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the-blind-geisha · 2 years
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holy eff, that was 2 years ago? im so sorry, im absolutely unaware of the passage of time XD but yep! that's me! it wasn't very hard to find you tbh, i went to overlord tag one day and i found your art. this time i simply searched for demiurge and was pleasantly surprised that you changed your blog again (more like returned to your old one but yeah). don't worry tho, no need to hide from me! im a good anon, and a person you knew quite good (and also a person who, i think, triggered you once? with some depressing themes. im so deeply sorry for that) glad to hear you have everything under control now! but im more glad that you're enjoying yourself and grow the fandom. overlord is really amazing, both anime and light novel (that's it, if i ever decide to watch the new season or catch up with the novel). you did a very fine choice, dear, to get into it! (and, especially, to get into demiurge hehe) don't mention it truly! i've been wondering for a few weeks now how you're doing and all. and i'm really, really happy to see you're enjoying yourself and having fun.
I also wanted to say that, uh, i know how ac fandom treated you and please take no offence, but, i really appreciate that you didn't delete the responds to people's asks or the gifts that are ac themed. i know it wasn't an easy choice, and i really appreciate it. it sounds stupid but it means a lot as it brought some pleasant memories. so, yeah, thanks for that! <3 (also: your emmett is forever in our hearts) i hope you won't mind me being here from time to time (and not like, appearing after 2 years XD). you were always so lovely to talk to! you still are, of course, but yeah! lovely to talk to and you're lovely too! as always <3 - P
LOL to be fair, I think the pandemic really threw us all for a loop. X”D Heck, it being 2022 hasn't really come to my realization yet. I still keep thinking 2020 was just last year.
Haha, that is very fair. ♥ If you were able to hunt through the Demiurge tag, that is indeed where I kinda live now. ♥ Though I am working more and more on drifting my version of him out of the fandom and into my original works. But we'll see! I do love the character a lot!
Oof, I gotta be honest, anon. My memory got a bit scattered no thanks to anemia causing me a bit of brain fog/damage. So if you did anything that triggered me, it's quite alright. ♥ I've obviously gone past whatever may have happened now, and it is all water under the bridge as they say.
I adore Overlord, but my poor Albedo and Demiurge... I wish they were given more time to develop. ;~; They are my treasures next to Yuri Alpha. ♥ But I do hope you enjoy the new season! I love the animation has really been upped in quality! I'm still eagerly waiting for the movie!
Thank you! I have a lovely group of readers and friends who support me like yourself, and I appreciate every single one of them. I especially love the readers who have been with me since the AC days. The fact you guys will still follow me from one thing to the next is sweet, and I am always happy to see reoccurring names pop up now and again!
I will be honest, hon, in that I did delete a few things in my desire to heal away from the fandom years back, but not all of it is gone, no. ♥ The Fall is still on AO3, I just removed my name from it, and the Prostitute Series, while removed from AO3, is still on here too. I know those were the main stories people would have been upset to be removed from the net completely. I do still have the others on my hard drive (like certain love letters and The Dove Effect, Daddy Dearest, etc), but I just don't feel comfortable releasing them again to the public. Maybe one day. ♥
Aww, thank you! I actually did plan on bringing Emmett back into a Victorian setting but away from AC: S. ♥ I had a werewolf story in London kinda idea that I wanted him to be apart of, so he will return just—in a new way and away from Jacob being his dad. (He's gonna have an adopted dad/mentor instead.)
Awww, I adore when folks drop in to say hi every now and again! I still get people DMing me saying 'thank you for writing this super old fic from 2005' ever so often, and it's great! I hope people never think it's weird or annoying to talk to me about old times or just say hello. I promise, it's okay to do so. ♥
It's kind of why I never really ever change my name or at least, try not to. ♥ I want it to be easier for folks to find me.
It's always great to hear from you, anon! ♥
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thesokovianaccords · 2 years
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Fic Rec Tag Game
I was tagged in this almost TWO YEARS AGO by the fabulous @theawkwardterrier and am just now getting to it as I clean out my drafts folder (lol sorry Leah...)
Rules: Spell out your user name using titles of fics you like and/or love -  any fic that you enjoy for any reason whatsoever. Then tag at least one fandom friend to do the same.
WARNING! Only begin if you have time to kill. (This is FOR REAL! Even if you’re not digging around to find a specific fic, or trying to match a particular letter, or trying to decide which options to include, you WILL get caught up reading!)
Bonus option! Give it a 1-5 knowledge rating (KR) in terms of how well you need to know canon to enjoy the fic. 1 meaning “no previous knowledge necessary” and 5 meaning “need to be well-versed in all of canon.
(Jesus why is my url so long)
again, this is two years overdue so I have no idea who did this - but feel free to consider this me tagging you! it was so fun to go back through my bookmarks to find these fics lol 
time & spaces. by thesemovingparts - pre-michelle jones/peter parker, michelle jones is tony stark’s daughter (just trust me lol). KR: 3.5
Hold Your Voice In My Heart (Till I Can Hold You In My Arms) by fluffernutter8 - steve rogers/peggy carter (aka that time that @theawkwardterrier wrote a madam secretary au bc she is the Actual Best). KR: 3.0
Extended Disarming by tara_stofse - phryne fisher/jack robinson - a short fluffy ficlet that really encapsulates them, I think. KR: 3.0.
Swipe Right, Swing Left by downn_in_flames - james potter/lily evans, a modern american politics/tinder au. yes I know. KR: 2.5.
one time thing. by bemusedbicycle - kate sharma/anthony bridgerton, modern au. hot af. KR: 2.0.
know your devils and your deeds by irnan - pepper potts/tony stark. an oldie but a goodie, god I love them. KR: 3.0 for 2012 mcu haha.
One For the Money (And Four to Go) by Lavendergaia - jemma simmons/leo fitz, daisy johnson/antoine triplett. bachelor auction au. excellence. KR: 2.5.
The Viscount Who Courted Me by theladyrainbow - kate sharma/anthony bridgerton. an au in which anthony pursues kate from day one. KR: 3.5. (it’s technically a T but mind ya business).
in tongues and quiet sighs by Elizabeth (anghraine) - cassian andor/jyn erso, han solo/leia organa. “Alderaanian runs under all the intersections of Leia Organa's and Cassian Andor's lives.” KR: 4.0.
A Strange New Story Every Time by gyzym - logan echolls/veronica mars. KR: 3.0.
no one can stop me, not even gravity or nasa by magneticwave - leia organa/han solo. KR: 4.5.
Any Fin Goes by vextant - gen. avengers. a heist. a shark. truly one of my favorites. KR: 2.0.
Casablanca by BeeDaily - james potter/lily evans. modern au. I love them. KR: 2.5.
Corner Man by Snapjack - james bond/eve moneypenny. oh yes. KR: 4.0.
One Hundred and Eleven Days by themonkeycabal - bucky barnes/darcy lewis, darcy lewis is tony stark’s daughter. ‘run verse. this whole series is one of my all-time favorites, but picking this one bc I needed a fic that started with ‘o’ but also bc it’s emotionally wrecked me for years :D KR: 4.0.
Rosehill Cottage by agentverbivore (verbivore8642) - leo fitz/jemma simmons, a holiday-esque au. a delight! KR: 3.5.
Don't Stop Me Now by CloudAtlas - clint barton/natasha romanoff, peggy carter/steve rogers, pepper potts/tony stark. college au, another oldie but a goodie. KR 2.5.
Summer Soldier by Remember When (scribblemyname) - bucky barnes/susan pevensie, one of the only ones out there. I need more people to understand how this ship is important to me and to the world at large. KR 3.5. 
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misnomera · 4 years
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On racial stereotyping of the Haans in TMA...
Right so as someone who is ethnically Chinese I have NO FUCKING clue how I didn’t notice this more distinctly in my initial binge of tma (going too fast and not paying closer attention to character names and descriptions, probably) but the Haan family storyline is, all horror elements aside, pretty fucked up in terms of racial representation re: stereotyping. This got long as hell, but please please please take a moment to read through if you’ve got time for it. thanks.
To start off, the Haans are one of the few characters in tma with an explicitly specified race and ethnicity—Chinese—and pretty much the only explicitly Chinese characters in tma, other than the mostly unimportant librarian (Zhang Xiaoling) from Beijing. But like, Haan isn’t even a properly Chinese surname, at least not in the way that it’s spelled in canon (it should be Han, one a. A quick google search tells me that Haan as a surname has...Dutch origins??).
Of course, that could be chalked up to shoddy anglicization processes within family histories, which certainly isn’t uncommon with immigrant families, so I’m not going to dwell on names too much (although I also find it interesting that John Haan’s name is so specifically and weirdly anglicized that he changed his own surname?? Hun Yung to John Haan is a very big leap of a name change and frankly not very believable. ANYWAY, this is not that important. I don’t expect Jonny, a white Englishman, to come up with perfectly unquestionable non-Cho-Chang-like Chinese names, though it certainly would be nice. Moving on).
What really bothers me about the Haans is how they almost exclusively and explicitly play into negative Chinese immigrant stereotypes. I don’t even feel like I need to say it because it’s like...it’s literally Right There, folks. John Haan (in ep 72) owns and operates a sketchy takeout restaurant. They’re all avatars of the Flesh—and John Haan is Specifically horrific and terrifying because he cooked his wife’s human meat and fed it to his unknowing customers. Does that remind you of any stereotypes which accuse Chinese people of consuming societally unacceptable and ethically questionable things like dog/cat/bat meat (which, if it’s not already crystal fucking clear, we don’t. do that.), which in turn characterize us as horrible unfeeling monsters? John Haan’s characterization feeds (haha, badum tss) directly into this harmful stereotype that have caused very real pain for Chinese people and East Asians in general. 
And Jonny does nothing to address that from within his writing (and not out of it either). And, speaking on a more meta level, Jonny could’ve easily had these flesh avatars be individuals of any race (like, what’s Jared Hopworth’s ethnicity? Do we know? No? Well then). Conversely, he could’ve easily, easily had a Chinese person be an avatar of any other entity. So why did he have to chose specifically the Flesh?
(This is a rhetorical question. You know why. Racial stereotyping and invoking a fear of the other in an attempt to enhance horror, babey~)
On Tom Haan’s side, Jonny seems weirdly intent on having other characters repeatedly comment on his accent (or rather, lack thereof) in relation to his race. Think about how, in ep 30 (killing floor), the fact that Tom Haan had spoken a line to the statement giver in “perfect English” was an emphasized beat in that statement, and a beat that was supposed to be “chilling” and meant to signify to us that something was, quote-unquote, “not right” with Tom Haan. Implicitly, that’s saying that it was unexpected, not “normal”, and in this case even eerie, for someone who looks Chinese to have spoken in fluid, unbroken English. Mind you, the line itself was perfectly scary on its own (“you cannot stop the slaughter by closing the door”), so why did Jonny feel the need to note the accent in which it was spoken in? Why did Jonny HAVE to have that statement giver note, that he initially “wasn’t even sure how much English [Haan] spoke”? 
This happens again in episode 72 with a Chinese man (and again, his ethnicity is Explicitly Noted) who we assume is also Tom Haan. This one is rather ironically funny and kind of painfully self aware, because the statement giver expresses surprise at Haan’s “crisp RP accent” and then immediately “felt bad about making the assumption that he couldn’t speak English,” and subsequently admitted that thought was “low-key racist.” Like, from a writing perspective, this entire passage is roundabout, pointless, and says absolutely nothing helpful to enhance the horror genre experience for listeners (instead it just sounded like some sort of half-assed excuse so Jonny or other listeners could say “look! We’ve addressed the racism!” You didn’t. It just made me vaguely uncomfortable). And again, having other people comment on our accents/lack thereof while assuming we are foreign is a Very Real microaggression that east asians face on the daily. If Jonny needed some filler sentences for pacing he could’ve written about Literally anything else. So why point out, yet again, that the crazy murderous man was foreign and Chinese? 
At this point, you might say, right, but yknow, it was just that the statement givers were kind of racist! It happens! Yeah sure, ok, that’s a passable in-universe explanation for descriptions of Tom Haan (though not John Haan, mind you), but the statement givers are fake made up people, and statement’s still written by Jonny, who absolutely has all the power to write overt discrimination out of his stories. And he does! Think about just how many minor (and major!!) characters are so, so carefully written as completely aracial, and do not have their ethnicity implicated at all in whatever horrors they may or may not be committing. Think about how many lgbtq+ characters have given statements, and have been in statements, without having faced direct forms of discrimination, or portrayed as embodying blatant stereotypes in their stories (though lgbtq+ rep in tma certainly has their own issues that I won’t go into here). Jonny can clearly write characters this way, and he can do it well. So why, why, am I being constantly, repeatedly reminded in-text of the fact that the Haans are East Asian, that they’re from China, that they’re Chinese immigrants, that they’re second-generation British Chinese or whatever the fuck, and that they’re also horrifying conduits for blood, gore, and general fucked-up-ness? It’s absolutely not something that is Needed for the stories to be an effective piece of horror; the only thing it does is perpetuate incredibly harmful and hurtful stereotypes.
And listen, I love tma to bits. It’s taken over my blog. I’ve really loved my interactions with the fandom. And I am consistently blown away by Jonny’s writing and how well he’s able to weave foreshadowing and plot into an incredibly complex collection of stories. But I absolutely Cannot stop thinking about the Haans because it’s just. It’s such a blatant display of racial stereotyping in writing. And I’ve certainly seen a few voices talking about it here and there, and I don’t know if I’m just not looking in the right places, but it certainly feels like something that is just straight up not on the radar for a lot of tma fans. And I’m disappointed about that. 
Just, I don’t know. Take a look at those episodes again and do some of your own thinking about why these characters had to be specifically Chinese (answer: they didn’t.). And in general, PLEASE for the love of god turn a critical eye on character portrayals and descriptions whenever they are assigned specific races/ethnicities (Some examples that come to mind are Jude Perry, Annabelle Cane, and Diego Molina), because similar issues, to an extent, extend beyond the Haans, though I haven’t covered them here. 
You shouldn’t need a POC to do point out these problems for you when they’re so glaringly There. But for those of you who really didn’t know, hope this was informative in some way. I’m tired, man. If some of the only significant Chinese characters you write are violent cannibalistic men with a perverted relationship with meat, just don’t do it. Please don’t do it. 
EDIT: Since the making of this post Jonny has acknowledged and apologized for these portrayals on his twitter and in the Rusty Quill Operations Update, which went up September 2020. A long time coming, but better late than never. This of course doesn’t necessarily negate the harm done by Jonny’s writing, and doesn’t make me much less angry about it, but is appreciated nonetheless. For more on this topic there’s a lot of productive discussions happening in my “#tma crit” tag and in the notes of this post
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bibbawrites · 3 years
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First Man - Charlie Gillespie x Reader
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Request: NONE
Word Count: 1735 words 
Summary: the song First Man by Camila Cabello but make it about Charlie Gillespie
Warnings: i think theres one swear word and thats all ?
A/N: so i had originally written this for another fandom that i am no longer in but i decided to change it to charlie cause why not  this is literally just the song first man by camila cabello, so go listen to that if you dont know it haha  again i tried to make this gender neutral but i may have messed up at one point so if i did im very sorry  anyways hope you enjoy this little fluffy piece 
Tag List:  @happinessinthedarkesttimes​ @littlemissaddict @vicesvsvirtuesfanfic @headheartbellarke @lovesanimals​ @bartok-the-bat @juliefromaustralia @multi-universe21 @rangerelik
Winter 2019
It was a mild Winter's afternoon in LA. You walked down the stairs of your family home, bag in hand, smiling when you spotted your family sitting around the table, a board game in the middle.
"Y/N! Come join us!" Your mum called when she spotted you enter the room. You shook your head.
"Maybe another time, sorry guys. I'm actually just heading out, I'm gonna stay with Charlie tonight... is that okay?" Your father sighed before nodding.
"When will we get to meet this Charlie boy that we hear so much about?" He asked, standing up to walk over to you. You shrugged.
"I'm not too sure, but it will be soon, I promise." You grinned. Your little sister looked up from the game board.
"What's he like Y/N?" She asked, looking at you intently. A soft smile appeared on your face at the thought of your boyfriend.
"He's really sweet. He's funny, just like you Dad. He’s not super tall but it doesn’t even matter. And he loves dragging me along on hikes." You paused.
"I really like him." You finished. Your dad frowned slightly, but hid it quickly.
"That's nice to hear darling. Don't forget a jacket, okay?" He told you. You looked at your father knowingly. He had been like this with every boy you’d ever brought home, not that you'd brought home tons of boys before.
"No it's okay, it’s not that cold outside today. Besides, he's waiting outside for me." You said, glancing down at your phone to see the text from Charlie.
'I'm here' it read. You looked back up again, noticing your father watching you. He stepped closer, pulling you into a hug.
"Don't freak out Dad, I'll be fine." You assured him. He squeezed you tightly.
"I just worry about you." You smiled, pulling away.
"I know, I get that. But I'm an adult now Dad. I got this."
"I know, I know." He sighed. By now the rest of the family had gone back to their game.
You patted your dad on the chest before turning to leave, stopping when your hand touched the doorknob. You turned back around to face your father.
"Just remember Dad, you were the first man that really loved me." And with that you turned back to the door and left, leaving your dad to smile sadly. His little baby was growing up.
 Summer 2020
It was Summer and you and Charlie had a few days off from work. You had decided to head back to LA together, to visit your family. After all, you had been dating for over a year and Charlie still hadn't met your family yet. The family that you spoke so highly of.
You touched down at LAX and made your way through security quickly.
"You ready?" You asked, holding tightly to Charlie's hand as you made your way to baggage claim, where you had organised to meet your parents.
"Honestly? I'm fucking petrified." Charlie responded, causing you to laugh.
"You'll be fine. Everyone loves you Char, and my family will be no different." You walked around the corner, spotting your Dad quickly.
"Dad!" You called, rushing over to hug your father. Charlie walked over slowly. You pulled away and grinned, glancing at Charlie.
"Dad, I'd like to meet my boyfriend, Charlie." You introduced. "Char, this is my dad, Sam."
Charlie held his hand out for your dad to shake.
"It's nice to officially meet you Mr Y/L/N. Can I call you Sam?" He smiled nervously. Your father looked him up and down before taking his hand and shaking it.
"Sir will do. Charlie, short for Charles I assume?" His glare was stone cold. Charlie swallowed, nodding.
"Yes sir, but I prefer Charlie." Your father nodded before turning his attention back to you.
"How long are you two here for?" He asked, ignoring Charlie, who moved to grab the both of your bags that were coming along the carousel.
"We have 8 days off, but we're only here for 4." You responded. Your dad nodded.
"Well I guess that's better than nothing. Come on let's go, your mother is waiting in the car outside. She didn't want to pay for parking so she's been driving around while I waited in here."
And with that the three of you headed outside to the car.
 Luckily for Charlie the rest of your family weren't as scary as your father was.
Your mother was lovely, and she had been very welcoming, even speaking to him in French when it was brought up that the two shared a common language.
Your brothers were really cool and invited him to join them to play video games whenever he wanted.
And your little sister, well, she adored the Canadian boy from the minute he walked through the front door.
And just like that Charlie’s first day at the Y/L/N house was over.
After sitting outside for hours with you and your parents, Charlie decided to head off to bed, and with a quick kiss for you and a murmured "goodnight" he was gone.
"So what do you think?" You asked once you knew that Charlie was well and truly inside.
"He's lovely darling." Your mother told you, smiling. You turned to your father.
"Dad?" You asked. Your father shrugged.
"He's not too bad, I guess." He admitted. You shook your head slightly. Of course your father would say that.
"I met his family you know? They're really nice, just like you guys." You told your parents.
"Oh, that's good sweetie." Your mum grinned.
"His parents are great, they're really down to earth. And his brothers and sister are really cool. Plus they love their hockey." You looked at your dad as you said the last part, knowing how big of a hockey fan he was. Your dad nodded in appreciation.
"That's good to hear. If they like hockey they must be good people." Your mother nodded in agreement with her husband. You fell into a comfortable silence for a few seconds.
"You know..." You began, breaking the silence. "I think he might be the one." Your mother put her hand up to her mouth, unable to hide her excitement.
"Oh Y/N, you really think so?" She asked. You nodded.
"Yeah, I really love him." You smiled.
"And he's a good man?" Your dad questioned, fixing his gaze on you. You nodded quickly.
"I swear on my heart. He loves me, and he'd never hurt me." You assured him.
"Good." He said, and with that the conversation was over, the topic changing to gossip about a family friend who's husband had cheated on her.
And later when you were heading off to bed you made sure to give your dad an extra big hug and remind him softly that he was the first man that really loved you.
 The four days passed quickly and before anyone knew it, it was time for you and Charlie to leave.
Your family gathered on the driveway, next to Charlie’s car that he had collected on your second day back. After a few hugs with your siblings Charlie moved to bid farewell to your parents. Your mother pulled him into a hug.
"It was lovely to meet you darling." She said softly, before pulling away.
"You too." He smiled. "It was lovely to meet all of you."
"Don't be a stranger Charlie." She said.
"Yeah come back all the time." Your little sister agreed. Charlie nodded.
"I'll make sure of it." He turned his attention to your father, holding out his hand for him to shake. Your father took it, shaking it firmly.
"Thank you for having me sir." Charlie smiled politely. Your father paused, before faking a smile.
"It was no problem." You exchanged a knowing look with your mother. You both knew that your father didn't think that Charlie deserved you.
After a few more goodbyes you and Charlie hopped into the car and left, waving to your family as you pulled out. You had barely made it to the end of the street before you grabbed Charlie's arm.
"Wait we need to go back." You said quickly.
"Why?" Charlie asked, but turned around nonetheless.
"I forgot to tell my dad something." He pulled up in front of the house and you jumped out quickly, rushing over to your father who was still outside. He looked at you in confusion.
"I forgot to say, remember you were the first man who really loved me." You smiled softly, and with one last hug you left again.
 Spring 2022
It was a beautiful Spring day in Hawaii. You and your father were stood together at the top of the beach, dressed to the nines, him in a fancy suit and you in your chosen wedding outfit.
It was almost time.
Time for you to walk down the aisle and marry the love of your life.
You looked over at your father, noticing his tie was slightly crooked. You took a step closer, and fixed the tie, watching as he tried to fight back the tears that were threatening to fall. You smiled softly at him.  
"You know, I've never seen you cry before." You whispered. Your dad smiled, a tear falling down his cheek.
"You just look so beautiful Y/N. No matter what, you'll always be my little baby." He responded, pulling you into a hug.
As you separated the music began to play, and he held his arm out for you to take.
"Here we go." You whispered, and the two of you began your walk down the beach to where Charlie was waiting, teary eyed, at the end of the aisle.
As you walked, your father found himself looking over at you, taking in the tears of happiness and the look of love that you were giving Charlie. Your dad smiled to himself, glad that you had finally found the perfect man for you.
You reached the end of the aisle and you pulled your father into a hug.
"Remember," You whispered. "You were the first man who really loved me." You pulled away, stepping back. Your dad hesitated for a second before stepping forward to pull Charlie into a hug.
"Take care of my little angel." He whispered. Charlie nodded.
"Of course Sir." They pulled apart and your dad smiled softly.
"You can call me Sam."
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sarah-sandwich · 2 years
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Top 5 Creative Works of 2021
rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 (ish) favorite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2021. tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!
Tagged by @playboyphilanthro-pissed
1) Peaches Ain't Pretty - Gen, Harley Keener-centric - 17k
Harley Keener and his sister Abbie have never had an easy life, but they've always had each other and that's enough. They'll make it be enough.
my beloved ❤ tbh I surprised the hell out of myself with this one. First of all, I was inspired to write it by Devil Town by Cavetown (specifically the version linked--the kid's got like 4 versions now lol). I actually had the idea for this when I first heard the song wwaaaaayyyyy back when I was posting Don't Freak Out in 2020 and working on the sequel, but at that time I was SO overwhelmed (with covid and posting fic for the first time in nearly 2 years, and writing that freaking sequel (haha see what i did?), and covid) so I just ignored the plot bunny and forgot about it. Fast forward to a year later, I started listening to the song again and the idea came back to me and I was like, okay okay I don't have anything better to do rn, I'll just jot down some ideas... Then like 3 days later I had a completed fic lol
BUT before I started, I knew I wanted it to have a certain tone (serious and at times heavy, but not depressing--i wanted those spots of light) and I wanted it to follow the Keeners from childhood to their coming of age into adulthood. Honestly I didn't know if I could pull that off. Writing from a child's perspective is hard. Writing an accent I don't have without making it obnoxious is hard. I'm so stinkin' happy with it though! It turned out as perfect as I could have asked for. It still blows me away when i reread it. Like woah I made that.
When I started writing it I was iffy about working towards a parkner ending bc I really wanted it to be only about the Keeners but I'm weak so that's where it ended up lol And now I'm posting the parkner sequel! Check out A Peach Like You (which technically I wrote in 2021 even though I'm only just now posting it, so it counts)
2) The Distance Between (You and Me) - parkner - 29k
When Pepper offered to begin training him to become CEO of Stark Industries, she warned Harley it would put a target on his back. He didn't take her seriously until after he'd been left chained and shivering in a dark hole for three days.
Rescued but with his kidnappers still at large, Tony recruits a bodyguard to shadow his every step and keep him safe until Tasha can hunt down his kidnappers. Harley isn't impressed. If he wasn't already at his wit's end muscling through nightmares, dissociative episodes, and pretending like he's handling everything like a champ then maybe he'd be able to figure out what exactly makes Peter Parker so special.
Ah the bodyguard AU. This one was so hard to write. Not bc of the fic, but bc of my head space. Real life took a nose dive and let's just say I had a pretty shitty time starting in May last year and it didn't really let up until, uh, November?? Writing felt impossible. I had all these big awful feelings and I couldn't set them aside in order to write. I've never been a vent writer and quite frankly idk how to be honest enough with myself to do that on purpose...
All that to say, it took A LOT to get this one down. Major thank you to everyone--@michellejones-stacy I'm looking at you in particular ily ❤--who cheered me on and shared their enthusiasm with me. It literally wouldn't have happened if I didn't know you guys were looking forward to it. Some days the only reason I pushed myself to write was bc of you so 🙌🎉✨🥰😭 thank you
But then when I finished it, it felt hollow, like I'd gone through the steps of writing but there was no soul in it. I didn't believe the feedback I got telling me it was good. It took until like... last month? When I finally read it fresh that I realized actually yeah, everyone was right and it is good! So I'm super proud of myself that this fic exists at all, but also I'm proud of how it turned out despite my challenges while writing it.
3) The Human Kind - parkner - 3.7k
“Your game of tag made the news again,” Miles says with a frown. “I don’t get why you won’t talk to him.”
“It’s more like hide-and-seek,” he says, not bothering to address the second statement as he pulls off his mask. They’ve been through that song and dance enough times they both know it by heart and it’s lost its spark.
“That’s not how it looks on TV. Looks like a lot of chasing and not a lot of counting.”
“Yet it always ends with me hiding and him giving up on seeking so—,” He waves his hand in a ‘there you have it’ fashion then hits the spider symbol on his suit.
Or: Spider-Man has a stalker but it's not what you think
This one. This one I tried to write angst lol and I hurt myself! So mission accomplished? I re-read this one recently and I'm really happy with it. It starts out light and there are questions laid out that you don't get immediate answers too, but you don't really worry about it bc it's Peter and he's quipping and making jokes and it's fun, right? Then it gets serious and that's when my feelings get hurt.
4) No Need to Rush - parkner - 5.3k
5 times Peter almost says I Love You (but Harley does instead) + 1 time they both say it
(Yes, it's a needlessly complicated take on this trope but it's my needlessly complicated take on this trope)
There's a comment on this fic that essentially calls this the perfect spiderlad fic and that's what pops into my head every time I think of it lmao it makes me realize that this is p much the only fic where I wrote established Iron Lad rather than the beginnings of Harley becoming Iron Lad. I adore this fic in it's own right, but that comment + this fic makes me really really really want to go all out with a spiderlad fic. Harley and Peter fighting side-by-side, the quips and banter, the hurt/comfort, the intrinsic understanding between them that no one else can touch because only they know exactly what they're facing day-in and day-out, partners in every sense of the word--I just *wistful sigh* I'm gonna write one for real, a full-sized fic, and that's that on that.
5) Undercover? I thought you said undercovers... - parkner - 3.7k
Peter and Harley are undercover at a black-tie event and get into a sticky situation
Not that kind of sticky! Get your head out of the gutter you dirty bird
This one is pure fun. I had a blast writing it and I adored all of the squeeing comments I got for it and I get a good laugh out of it every time I re-read it. It's the embodiment of bickering as a love language.
Tagging (with no pressure/if you're busy you're busy): @theoceanismyinkwell @queenofmoons @michellejones-stacy (will it let me tag you twice?? we'll find out) @writingamongther0ses @joyful-soul-collector and anyone else who wants to share their most special babies of 2021! Tag me so I can see 😊
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imbellarosa · 4 years
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Let’s Talk Calm-ly about Two Loves
OR: When you’re a grown man who writes stories for a living, you definitely wrote your own weird bedtime story, too. 
The TLDR here is that H has taken one specific listener around the globe, notably to Tokyo and Jamaica. He quotes an old Victorian Poet who was an awful human but who’s lasting legacy is the phrase “a love that dare not speak its name” which is - you guessed it - a reference to queer love. He also is super excited to spend what seems like the foreseeable future with this listener and has bought a little house with a garden of daisies with them and it’s very sweet and domestic. Anyways this is a wild time and it’s all under a cut because it’s...really a lot. 
Anyways I think the people I owe thank yous this times around to are @queenlokibeth​ who had to listen to me scream about this for a while, Astrid, who screamed with me when this came out, and “M” who convinced me to finally get to work in this fandom. And, of course, all of the lovely people tagged below who’s work I used to build my argument. 
1.) Who Wrote “Dream With Me”? 
Well, not H, or so the story goes. Two other people (Steve Cleverly and Sanj Sen) did! I mean, right, okay, for a while I was like...that seems like an odd choice for a man who didn’t want to hand Two Ghosts over to his own band because it seemed too personal. He wrote on every song in both albums’ he’s released thus far, because he seems to be passionate about telling the stories he wants to tell (even if he won’t tell you explicitly what they’re about). But for a while, I was totally going with the flow there, and the rest of this analysis would still stand: the writer of this story definitely referenced a poem by Lord Alfred Douglas and Harry’s own songs. 
However, I then read this fun quote from the Co-founder and CEO of Calm: 
“Well,” he said, “The the Harry Styles one is interesting because that came purely from Harry Styles himself...we took the approach of creating a sort of musical epic poem – he doesn’t sing, it’s spoken with poetry, but there’s a sort of musical sound bed to it and it’s pulling on things and themes that Harry’s fans really adore about him and associate with him. So his story was driven really by him – we really created a concept around him.” 
-  Chris Advansun, July 7th, 2020 via @hlupdate​
And I thought, hmmm. This does not sound like a project that he was not involved in creating. From this point on (July, 7th 2020), I began to think of it as a three way co-collaboration between him and the other two authors. But this confused me a bit, because there was largely a nonreaction from the fandom. I was waiting for an actual transcript, because I always fall asleep to these meditation stories, but it was being referenced to as some sort of Y/N fic, which was...honestly not what I expected, but also not implausible, thanks to the ~lovely~ image this man has had since the age of sixteen. But also, twitter seemed to be concerned by other things at the moment, and no one was analyzing the story. . 
In fact, I messaged a friend the day that this story dropped, because it had been kind of a shit show day on Twitter. Rumors were sort of flying about everyone and everything: had Liam shaved his head? Was he engaged? Had he and Maya broken up? Were Zayn and Gigi engaged? Had they broken up? Did Niall have a girlfriend? (this one was true lol). Were Elounor engaged? Were they pregnant? Had they broken up??? My personal fav was the bald Liam rumor, which he promptly put to rest in LP Act 1 by...having a huge mane of hair. 
So then I thought - huh. Why has today looked like this? I’m not saying that there aren’t days that twitter goes wild because of boredom, because there definitely is - the articles about secret meetings in Italy that are coming out this week (8/12/2020) are proof positive. So that definitely does happen, but it doesn’t usually happen on the days that there’s a lot of content. And maybe I’ve just been starved for content in this fandom, but I would consider a 40 minute video quite a bit of content. 
Then the transcript dropped. I’m using two as references - this one on Wattpad and also @carl-and-pearl ‘s version here (thank you so much for the transcript!!). We’re going to get into a more detailed description of what’s going on in the story, but the first thing I recognized immediately is that it was first person POV. I knew that going in, based on the number of Y/N jokes going around on twitter. Then I read it aloud, and I realized that it read like a letter. Like an experience specific to the writer and the reader. And while that’s not super uncommon to write about an experience from the author’s POV - I listen to a podcast called Nothing Much Happens: bedtime stories for adults which has a similar concept - I thought it was odd that they were trying to include both the author and the listener. I completely understood why the y/n jokes were pertinent. But at the same time, it felt like something had snagged in my mind - like a particularly annoying splinter. 
The conversations I was having around this story - completely based on the content, concept, and my own instinct - was that this story contained specific references to one person. I thought that it did read like a love letter, and that most identifying features would have been taken out, but the essence remained. Which, once I thought about it, was something that H excelled at doing. Think about Sunflower Vol 6 and Adore You and Canyon Moon and even Watermelon Sugar and Golden.  Ask yourself, What do I know about the person they are about? They have skin that browns, they have a secret, they have mesmerizing eyes, they’re willing to dance in the kitchen with him (to dancehall), they have a belly, they’ve been through hard times, they’re witty, they have an accent, and they have lips. I know - super specific right?
So the splinter grew into a thorn - what was I missing? And then - when I was looking for something completely different - I stumbled upon this old interview Harry did with Zach Sang and the Gang Show back in 2017.  For context, he was being asked about Sweet Creature. As you can imagine, it’s hard for people to believe he wrote such a beautiful love song when he hadn’t ever really had a long term relationship (two hearts in one home?? Who did you move in with, you can imagine them asking. When did you have time?). So what did he have to say about this?
"In my opinion,” he explained, “I think most songs are written for one listener. Maybe there's one thing in there that only they'll notice about them.... It's so much easier to say something in a song than it is to say it to someone and I think it's really amazing to be able to communicate through that and be able to wrap up everything that you want to say in three and a half minutes and say it in a song."
- HS, May 3 2017
By this time, please believe that I was screeching. Seeing this felt like he put into words the exact feeling I had about “Dream With Me”. It felt like a nod to someone that I didn’t know, which made the story hard to listen to, tbh. Although, I will say that when I did finally listen to it, it knocked me out and gave me odd dreams so. Once was enough for me haha! 
So my new operating theory is exactly what Advansun said: I think that H was the primary writer/the driving force behind the story. Because of the references I’m about to run through, because it feels like the way he tells stories, and because they admitted to him being more involved than they originally claimed. That’s going to be how I write the rest of the analysis - under the impression that H had a direct hand in the story that was being put forth. However, I think that the analysis itself would stand whether or not he wrote any of it. It would just be a more tenuous reflection of him than I believe it to be. 
2.) How Do I Love Thee? In Two Ways. 
Before I jump into the story, let’s talk a little about the poem that I want to compare it to: Two Loves, by Lord Alfred Douglas.  Let’s be clear this is not at all a defense of who Bosie was - he was a terrible person, particularly in his later years, when he’d converted to Catholicism and turned his back on his younger self, and his partner, Oscar Wilde. He was violently anti-Semitic, and turned his back on his own community. I want to get this out of the way because I very much believe that we should examine artists for who they are. That is, after all, what I am trying to do here. 
But his poem Two Loves has often been used - much to his disappointment, I’m sure - as an exploration of queer love in Victorian times. A line that I will be exploring more deeply in a second was in fact used against Oscar Wilde in his trail for indecency . He attempted - unsuccessfully - to explain it away, but it was too blatantly about their relationship for even the British Victorian society to ignore. I really, really recommend a read of this poem, because it is - despite it’s author - a good piece of work, which explores the themes of shame and love and longing between two men in that time. 
I’m going to start with my own background, as someone who’s analyzed fandoms before. I first came across this poem in the Sherlock fandom, with this analysis by @the-7-percent-solution​, when I was running in that fandom, and she explains the poem brilliantly in just a few lines. I’m going to take a little longer to run through it, but if you want a concise explanation and a brilliant meta, I encourage you to run to their blog and check it out. That fandom taught me most everything I know about catching symbols and recurring themes and “clueing for looks” and I love it desperately, still. 
But we’re here to talk about this fandom, so on with the poem! Essentially, the poem outlines a dream the speaker had: In his dream, he’s standing in a field with flowers - beautiful ones of all kind - and he meets this young man with clear blue eyes and bright red lips and they kiss a bit and have a picnic, and it’s all lovely. If you think I’m kidding, I’m really not. Please, read it for yourself. 
Anyways, after they did they did the whole picnic thing, the speaker and his date go on a walk in this field, where they come across two figures. The first is described as, 
“...fair and blooming, and a sweet refrain Came from his lips; he sang of pretty maids And joyous love of comely girl and boy, His eyes were bright, and 'mid the dancing blades Of golden grass his feet did trip for joy; And in his hand he held an ivory lute With strings of gold that were as maidens' hair, And sang with voice as tuneful as a flute, And round his neck three chains of roses were.” 
- Two Loves, 1894
The speaker, however, was drawn to the second figure: 
“He was full sad and sweet, and his large eyes Were strange with wondrous brightness, staring wide With gazing; and he sighed with many sighs That moved me, and his cheeks were wan and white Like pallid lilies, and his lips were red Like poppies, and his hands he clenched tight, And yet again unclenched, and his head Was wreathed with moon-flowers pale as lips of death. A purple robe he wore, o'erwrought in gold With the device of a great snake, whose breath Was fiery flame..”
- Two Loves, 1984
Of course, the speaker immediately asks the second man who he is. The second man says, “My name is Love”. The first man corrects him quickly: 
“ He lieth, for his name is Shame, But I am Love, and I was wont to be Alone in this fair garden, till he came Unasked by night; I am true Love, I fill The hearts of boy and girl with mutual flame.”
-Two Loves, 1984
The second man sighs and acquiesces, “Have thy will. I am the love that dare not speak its name.” 
It was, of course, this last line that really gave the meaning of the poem away. It was the line that was put to Oscar Wilde as proof of a romantic relationship, it was the line that went down in history as a way to refer to queer love, and it was the line that first stuck out to me when I was reading “Dream With Me”. 
The reading here is clearly that “Love” is the love that is acceptable to society - easy, sweet, and cherished. “Shame” is the love that happens in secret - beautiful, alluring to the speaker, passionate, anxious ( as can be seen in the clenching and unclenching of his hands), and proud. He refuses to call himself as anything but what he is. The first man may call him Shame, but he refuses the name, and instead, offers a qualifier to his own descriptor. He is still love, he is just the love that can’t be spoken about. 
3.) Walking in Golden Fields of Sunflowers
Now let’s talk about “Dream With Me”. I’m ignoring the first few stanzas (from the line “Have you ever wondered” to “What the two of us can find”.) because those are pretty standard introductory paragraphs to a guided meditation. So we start with the line “Let’s travel now to moonlit valleys...”. 
I’m going to do the same thing I did with “Two Loves” first. I am going to describe literally, in general terms, what happens in the story. Warning, I change pronouns from “they” to “you” because the whole thing confuses me, but note that I’m always talking about the speaker and the listener: 
So after doing the standard intro, the speaker and the listener take a walk through the woods enjoying nature, particularly the grass, the trees, and the blue sky above. You’re already clearly in love. Then you’re magically on a raft, with cherry blossoms all around you. If you want a good visual for that, here’s a site that has pictures from a boat rental in Tokyo where you can snuggle on a raft in the  Chidorigafuchi moat. And then suddenly it starts raining, and they (you) watch the rain for a hot second, and then the scene magically shifts again, and you’re under a porch (although I guess it could be the boat rental’s porch. They do usually have covered areas). 
Kind of furthering that theory, they then lounge by the shoreline, skipping stones and hanging out, looking at the snow capped mountains. In case you’re curious, because at this point I sure was, you can see mountains from certain areas in the city of Tokyo. 
Anyways, then it’s snowing, and you’re magically in a cabin, just chilling by the fire, and you fall asleep again. You wake up somewhere else.
Where are you now? Well, you’re on a tropical island filled with palm trees. As an American, my mind immediately jumps to the Caribbean, but I suppose it could absolutely be in the Mediterranean as well. The island has white beaches, mangroves, a turquoise ocean, and a gorgeous, peaceful atmosphere. 
If you’re curious as to what a mangrove looks like - and I certainly was - they are a group of trees and shrubs that live in the coastal intertidal zone and Jamaica is doing a massive restoration project involving primary school children to regrow this vital part of their ecosystem. More interestingly, there currently exist no mangrove forests in the Mediterranean, so my initial feeling that this scene would take place in the Caribbean was correct. On that note - again, because I was curious - Jamaica has gorgeous white sand beaches with turquoise oceans. 
But I’ve gone off topic again! After you’re minds are “in tune” once more (trying to find a heartbeat, anyone?), you reappear in a meadow, with beautiful flowers of all kind, where you are now walking hand in hand through a field of sunflowers, which give the feeling a “warm and golden hue”. Then you come across a little farmhouse with daisies poking out (clearly I have no way of locating this anywhere in the world, but I assume that the UK has both sunflowers and daisies). It’s an empty house which was loved and left because of the passage of time, which inspires my favorite line in the poem: “ The thought of passing time inspires/A feeling that grows stronger”. It’s just...really sweet to me. 
So, of course, they do what anyone would do when they come across an empty farmhouse, they go inside. And there, they begin to fall asleep, reflecting on all they have just seen, referencing other scenes of the poem: “ Moonlit valleys, Burdened forests, Gazing at the ocean. Summer meadows, Tranquil sunsets steeped in emotion”. 
The next few stanzas are just going to be copy-pasted, and then I’ll go into them a bit, but this is the end of the poem, so they’re the final reflections;
“The tenderness we feel When we are close Two minds as one Surrounds us and connects us But we’ve only just begun.
For now we dream together Of all there is to follow. And know that sleep will keep us safe From now until tomorrow.
Maybe all the memories That we’ve gathered here tonight Are all dreams now remembered Or wishes in plain sight.
No matter what They’re with us now. For this night and forever. And every time we close our eyes They’re yours and mine to treasure.” 
- HS, Dream With Me, via @carl-and-pearl​
And that’s it! The literal story, in short, is that you started in a forest, then went to Tokyo (maybe) and then Jamaica (perhaps) and then back to a field of sunflowers and daisies in the UK (which is also a guess, it could be Italy or France or Idaho for all I know, but let’s call it an educated guess). 
4.) My Dream Journal
So now that we know what happens in the story, how do we interpret this? Well, There are a few lines in the poem that I want to draw your attention to: the first takes place in the first part of this story, when you’re still in the forest. This is, I must say, the most direct reference to Two Loves in the whole poem/song/story. Both works are describing a walk in the woods with your loved one, and, in a fun reference in the middle of the story, Dream With Me says
The shimmering reflection Shows us smiling from above. But what we think But dare not speak is L-O-V-E love.
-Dream With Me, 2020
Remember that line I mentioned before? I am the love that dare not speak its name. Right, so that’s almost a direct quote. It also has a really fun nod to “I Would” (Would he say he’s in L-O-V-E?/Well if it was me then I would), but I digress. 
This first part of the narrative, I feel, really sets up what the rest of it will look and feel like, in the same way that “Golden” sets the tone for Fine Line. (You didn’t think I was going to make a post about Harry and NOT mention Golden, did you?? If you did, I’m disappointed!!). So  let’s take a look at what’s happening, and the language he’s using to describe it. 
One of the best things about this poem is how vivid it feels. Of course, I’m about to argue that it’s vivid because it was based in reality, but let’s talk about the sheer amount of detail he uses to describe the place he’s walking through. The valley (canyon lmao) is moonlit, the grass and the leaves make mosaics of green, you’re walking by the heather (the symbolism of heather is good luck, admiration, and protection), the sepia sunlight breaks through the trees. 
You know what it kind of sounds like? Sweet Creature. You’re about to roll your eyes at me! I can feel it! But listen, okay?  
“Sweet creature Running through the garden Oh, where nothing bothered us But we're still young I always think about you and how we don't speak enough”
Which, to be honest, sounds like what they’re doing. They’re walking through the garden in the sun, not daring to speak about the Love that he (they both) feel, and instead refering to it in veiled Victorian terms. 
And then we head to Tokyo! I know that you’re about to ask me why I think it’s Tokyo versus...idk, anywhere else? Well, for one, he went to Tokyo (to let it go) publicly in 2019. He was there for a few months, and there are some great pictures of that time: 
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Look! Here he is with his club owner friend and his dog, and a fun red bandanna! But let’s be honest, the dog really steals the show here. But wait! there’s more! More dog content, too!
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This was on Jan 31st, 2019, and he’s taking the dog for a walk! Very cute! If nothing else, he spent a lot of time with dogs in Tokyo! And the city fits the description of the story. So I feel rather comfortable with my interpretation that this first date is a memory of this trip - or another - to Tokyo. 
So what did “you both”do in Tokyo? Well, chill on a raft while the cherry blossoms flutter around you, clearly. You also refocused your purpose. What did he do in Tokyo in 2019? Well, he took time to think about and write songs for the album he was about to go record. Kind of like refocusing on what’s next, right? And then, in the story when “you both” had time to think amongst the lake and the water and the rain and the moon, and you’d come to the conclusions you needed to, you left. What did he do when he did the things he needed to? Well, he left, too. 
And where did he go? Well, in real life, I suppose he went to do his job. But, in the story, you’re meant to be falling deeper and deeper into sleep, so it’s sort of like traveling backwards, you see? Like counting down to one. So you end up on this island with turquoise ocean and mangrove forests. I’m calling this Jamaica. Why? Well, the description fits, for one, down to the four types of mangroves that exists within its ecosystem. 
And - probably the biggest reason - I can place him there, too. Here’s him in 2017:
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I added this picture because the water around him....looks rather turquoise, doesn’t it? Kind of like he’s enjoying his time on a tropical island by the beach?? Oh, and here’s another one!: 
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The red bandanna makes a comeback! 
So what are you doing in Jamaica, according to the story? Well, you’re hanging out, basically. Enjoying the beach and each other, of course!  What else? To be exact, “[Your] thoughts dovetail and unify/ In tune two minds together”. I’m so glad that you’re tuned like an old guitar now! Congrats! Really happy for you! 
What was he doing in Jamaica three years ago? Why, he was recording his first album, or so the story goes. I’ll tell you something: finding press for that album was literally the most difficult part of this whole analysis. I got a fair bit of the tattoo roulette with Kendall Jenner, and some things about Carolina, but the interview with Zach Sang took me like an hour and a half to find again to link. The fact that a lot of it has been buried is...not great, for posterity purposes. He’s going to want that one day. 
But I’ve gotten off track again! We gotta go back and finish our story, right? What happens now? Well, this does: 
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hahahaha okay, I’m really sorry, but I had to. I’m not, actually, making it up though! According to the story: 
“ As minutes turn to hours We drift off somewhere new. And visualize a stairway To a door we now walk through”
- Dream With Me, 2020
So maybe Louis was just...demonstrating for you. 
Anyways! Where do you walk out to? A golden field full of sunflowers. You walk for a minute, then come across an old house with daisies popping up out of the garden. And that’s where the story ends. I guess you’ve made that farmhouse feel like home. 
Now to the little reflection he does on the outro. The lines I want to bring your attention are: “The tenderness we feel when we are close two minds as one surrounds us and connects us but we’ve only just begun” and “Maybe all the memories that we’ve gathered here tonight are all dreams now remembered or wishes in plain sight.”
Let’s talk about the first sentence first. In the context of finding a home that could be a shared home, and a future, this is very much an “end of the story, beginning of our lives” sort of thing. You’re back from all over, and it’s time to settle down, and see what’s next. 
And now the second sentence. I think this is the one that really drives my point about this story being a collection of memories he has - that’s what he calls it. The story is “gathered memories” that might also be called “remembered dreams” (think of how people say of vacations, “oh it was a dream!”) or you might call it “wishes in plain sight”. This feels in line with the rest of the story. In this stanza, he’s sort of letting you in a bit. If I’ve read this right - and I really think that I have - he’s giving the larger context for the story. It’s a collection of memories he’s had with someone he loves. 
5.) Cool! Can you prove it? 
I mean, I’d argue that if you read this far, I have proved it, but let’s make some more links, shall we? This was called a “muscial epic” that was “driven by him”. I’d argue that if I know my Victorian literature (thank you, Sherlock!), then he definitely does. Then there’s the fact that he quoted it, so. That did happen. And he knows what it means. And even if he didn’t, there were two other people on the story. Someone was more than capable of catching that one, and the fact that they didn’t speaks to intent. They want you to think of that phrase when you read this poem. They want you to think of that walk in the woods while you’re going on this one. 
And, as for my assumption that this is for and about one person, well. Think about it. He said that he writes his songs for a single listener. I’m not saying it’s the same listener each time, let’s get that right, but it is always just for one person. With that, and with the assumption that he’s been involved in the writing of this story, I’d say that the same rule applies. He went with someone to Japan and Jamaica (J^2 haha). And, if I had to guess, it was the same person. 
Why, you ask? Well, for one, if that weren’t the case, then this poem would no longer be for one listener, it would be for multiple. And, for another, imagine how awkward it would be to listen to it with his current partner and have to explain “oh, yeah that was the super romantic vacation I took with someone else” . And, I suppose that because I think that attitude of “refocusing” and “dovetailing” and “tuning” and getting excited about imagining all of the tomorrows with your partner speaks to a long term relationship breathing easily, you know? 
I’m also going to argue that describing the aura around the house as “golden” was intentional, especially when paired with the location - in the middle of a field of sunflowers. Those are both direct references to his songs. And those two songs are particularly linked by the number 28. The third song that features 28 is Fine Line the song, but that’s a different story. Anywho! “Golden”’s bridge just repeats the word ‘golden’ twenty eight times (if you go here , you can count the bridge) and “Sunflower Vol. 6″ ends the song with 28 “boops” (believe me, I wish I was making this up. I’m not.). So then, once again, you’ve linked a story to two already linked songs. 
And, even if you don’t buy the intentional repetition, they’re linked another way, aren’t they? The color scheme and the sun symbol. Sunflowers were named because of their sun-like appearance. They turn to face it. They symbolize loyalty and adoration. And then, of course, the sun is - say it with me - golden. And it - like the person in golden - waits in the sky, beautiful and dangerous and constant. And here that symbol is, in a farmhouse in the middle of nowhere. At home. 
This whole story feels like you’re taking the time to find that heartbeat that you think you might have lost, and sort of coming back to a space where you understand that this is what you want, now and forever. It feels like finding a home that could be yours forever, and it feels like walking through some of the moments that remind him of that. 
It really is rather lovely, if you think about it, especially since he has a tendency to attribute “home” to people rather than place, in his songs. So it’s like. Going all around the world and always being at home. 
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top five of ‘20
Rules: It’s time to love yourselves! Choose your 5 (ish) favourite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc.) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you brought into the world in 2020. Tag as many writers/artists/etc. as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!
thank you @xanthippe74 for the tag!
well! it’s been quite a year, hasn’t it? 
i hadn’t written fanfic at all since like 2012 prior to this year, and that was in a completely different fandom; when drarry grabs you, it grabs hard, eh? i wrote 51 fics this year and there’s still time for more 😬
picking my top five is hard! i already went a little too into my feelings about what are probably my automatic first choices here and here, so i’m going to exclude those from this list!
i always make the ‘i love all my children equally’ joke from arrested development about my fic, but for the most part i’m really telling the truth—i know not all my fics are incredible or excellent, but i put time and effort into all of them, and even the not as good ones are part of my journey as a writer, because i really feel i’ve improved by leaps and bounds this year. i’ve certainly gotten better at producing a quality fic at the eleventh hour, haha.
honestly though, there absolutely are some fics that are a little closer to my heart (besides the two mentioned in the links above), so i’m going to attempt to narrow that down into five!
in no particular order:
the best kind of bad: this was an expansion of a discord drabble, and is my first attempt at writing first-person, ever! it also was a bit of a tone shift from my previous efforts up to this point—a little darker, a little ambiguous, less focus on humor and snappy banter and more on making the atmosphere match the vibes i was going for. this was my first more ‘open ending’ fic that doesn’t answer all the questions it put forth, and i definitely have taken that and run with it in the intervening months!
push and pull you down: so i think by now everyone in the drarry fandom knows about this gifset, right? of course when a fest all about inspiration from gifs and images came out i had to use this one! i’ve always loved the idea of a totally unredeemed draco who isn’t trying to be nice and conform to post-war life, a draco who still uses his money and his name to get his way no matter what. and what better exemplifies that than drug-peddling and sex on potions? i also have a lot of thoughts about harry as an auror—i love writing him as confident and competent, of course, but equally do i enjoy writing him questioning himself and wondering if maybe this path isn’t for him after all. also, smoking is sexy and that’s that on that.
in knots: so, full disclosure; i didn’t like this one at all when i first wrote and posted it. it was kinktober and here i was writing a sad, strange little fic about PTSD and living up to our legacies and how our images of ourselves are based so much on our parents, and the adults in our lives, and the things we were told as children. what the fuck is that doing in the middle of all the relatively hot smut i wrote? but, up it went, and when i re-read it the next day, i completely changed my tune. it’s rough, sure—all of my kinktober things are as they’re not edited at all, but this one has probably more feelings per capita than almost anything else i’ve written, and it got right to the heart of a lot of the character motivations that i have in my head when i write these two, but don’t always articulate.
in His name: ahhhhh man. okay. so this one really, really got away from me as you can tell by the word count. i didn’t edit or revise any of my kinktober fics before posting them, but this one i spent a lot of time researching first, and i’m thrilled with how it came out. as someone who grew up watching buffy and had a long-time love affair with supernatural, writing something with sexy demonic possession has always been on my wish list, but it’s not exactly a common thing to work into the harry potter universe! i got to sprinkle this fic with all of my favorite tropes and i think i managed to maintain the intensity of the fic throughout the whole thing, even though it’s so dang long haha.
in charge: so anybody who’s read my writing knows that i have a pretty particular style of draco and harry that i write. even if i adjust their personalities, there are some core tenets that remain. i went a totally different route for them with this one, and i love how it turned out. forcing myself to step back and throw away everything i’m used to for characterization was so, so fun, and this dynamic and vibe is just so tasty that i may have to come back to it!
and yes, three of the five of these are from kinktober. i found that having to come up with new ideas every single day really stretched my writer muscles and forced me to go outside my comfort zone in so many ways; it was a challenge to not just write the same exact scenario with a cut-and-paste kink for the smut, but at the risk of sounding self-aggrandizing, i really think i achieved that, and i’m quite proud of everything i wrote that month. it made me a better writer and i highly recommend that everyone participate in something like this if they’re able!
and hey would you look at that—you’ll get the chance! i’m going to take this opportunity to link to @hpkinkuary, which will be a list of 28 kink prompts i’ll be posting in mid-january and hosting throughout the month of february! there will be an ao3 collection and some very pretty graphics that i’ve yet to make, and there are no rules or participation requirements, so if you feel like you might want to give it a shot go ahead and give that account a follow!
i’m tagging @tackytigerfic, @dracoladon, @shealwaysreads, @maesterchill, @p1013, @quicksilvermaid, @pineau-noir, @peachpety, and anyone else who sees this and wants to do it; make sure you tag me in it so i can see your replies!!
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metalbvcky · 3 years
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2020 Fic Year in Review
I’m waiting for my Sims game to finish updating, so I thought I’d do this since I saw @kalee60‘s post about it :) 
Total number of completed stories: 
14 (15 if you include a short 1am-oneshot I orphaned haha) 
Total number of words: 
111,575 (and that’s not including stuff I scrapped/haven’t posted omg) 
Fandoms written in:
Marvel/Stucky but also Supernatural (on my main) just a tad because haven’t posted anything yet but I’m including it anyway haha 
Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you’d expected?
Oh, absolutely! Heck, I never thought I’d write anything when it comes to fic because I’ve always kept quiet about my writing. (And I’ve been doing it since I was like 12 and it all started with my Club Penguin phase pffft)  But my interest turned into an obsession rather quickly and I honestly can say, without a doubt, that @buckybees​ is the whole reason why I even got the courage to post my first fic! I’m so glad I did because writing fic has given me a new perspective on fandom in general. And it makes me appreciate fandom/fanon even more. 
What’s your own favourite story of the year?
Pretty much all of them but Bucky's Got a Bun in the Oven? holds a special place in my heart. Not only was it my first published fic, but I never thought I’d write something like that. I go back and re-read it frequently since it’s so short. 
No lie: Sometimes I look back at that fic and it makes me wanna write a series of short oneshots with Pregnant!Bucky. Like, just Domestic Steve/Bucky living in the modern day with a baby on the way. Bucky shopping for baby clothes, decorating the nursery, having snack parties with Natasha, taking care of the baby after the birth, those sort of things. Oh, I think I just talked myself into another idea. 😂 
Did you take any writing risks this year?
Ehh, not really? However, I did write a series of crack oneshots lol. Some are crazier than others. 
Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the new year?
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Apple Pie Crumble Cake - This is my #1 goal. It’s a Bakery!AU Kid Fic that I’ve been planning for months. It’s gonna be multi-chaptered, and at least 50k. I have 10 chapters outlined and there are still more I need to get to, but probably won’t until I start writing the darn thing lol. 
I wanna start posting some smut oneshots on my secondary pseud, I have some done but I don’t think those will ever see the light of day since they’re just for practice- most of them were thought of on the spot without any outlining. I’d like to keep anything (totally) nsfw separate from my default pseud, just to be organized lol. And yes, this asexual read/writes smut. 😏 (my personal rule is as long as it doesn’t involve me, I’m good!) 
I thought long and hard on this in the past week or so, and originally I thought I’d join the Shrunkyclunks ‘21 Bang but the more I thought about it, the less I wanted to do it. It’d be my first bang, and while I have an idea, it’s just a little intimating to me lol. Soo, I’ll pass this year. Instead, I’m gonna look out for a Bingo whenever a new one starts up, since I’ll prob be more comfortable with that :) 
(Does this short lil Beach!AU count even though it’ll be done in 2020 but will be posted next year?? lolol) 
On my main, I’m writing a Supernatural + Spongebob crossover fic. Sort of like the episode, Scoobynatural. And I have a feeling that it’s gonna be turned into a series because I’m latched onto this idea- that started as a joke. 
Most popular story of the year.
Are we talking hits or kudos?? Hits, Buchanan Medical. Kudos, The Case of Bucky’s Wisdom Teeth. Eitherway, I’m so happy those two made it as my most popular stories. Buchanan Med is close to me on a personal level, and Bucky’s wisdom teeth fic is something I’ve always wanted to read but never existed :3 
Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion:
I think @kalee60​ explained it perfectly when it comes to fics ‘flopping’ (I see this a lot on r/fanfiction) People will see it, they might like it, or won’t like it. And that’s okay! Not everything is for everyone, neither are tropes/genres. I know myself, I’m not a fan of A/B/O and the same could go for someone else who likes my personal favorite genre, hurt/comfort. And sometimes it’s kinda like an age old Tumblr saying: A post that took time and effort can get little as 10 notes but a spur of the moment post can get thousands. (Okay so, I made that up on the spot pffft) 
Most fun story to write.
Buchanan Medical, but Mercury In Retrograde was super fun since I added the whole ‘space puns/pickup lines’ aspect to it. They basically share the same AU, but they’re totally different and that’s why I love them.  
Most unintentionally telling story:
The entire Buchanan Med series. I wanted to explore Steve having asthma in a modern universe (because I too suffer from it- my whole life) and I really, truly, bled a little bit of my personal experience with the disease into the series. Having Bucky there, taking care of/treating Steve? It felt really comforting to me. And hey, write those self comfort fics!!! 
Biggest disappointment.
I hoped to finish the last oneshot of Buchanan Med this year but sadly, my motivation for it just tanked. I write hurt/comfort best when I’m in the right mood for it, and I’m still waiting for it to come back to me, whenever that may be XD. 
Biggest surprise.
The amount of reception I’ve gotten overall, the people I’ve met, the friends I’ve made, and new fandom experiences I’ve gotten to experience myself! Seriously, never in a million years did I think I’ve ever call myself a fanfic writer. But here I am, and I couldn’t be happier <3
~~~
My Sims game finished updating on the fifth question but I kept on rambling because I love taking about my writing!!! It made me realize that wow, I really did do a lot this year when it comes to fanon- especially since it was my first time delving into the world that is fanfiction writing <3 I have many hobbies, video games being the longest one, but I think I’ve spent more time writing/reading than playing games this year. My teenager-self WOULD NEVER believe that! But as the legendary Reggie Fils-Aimesays once said, "If it’s not fun, why bother?” 
I’m gonna tag you guys if you wanna do this! @buckybees​ @justice-for-plums​ @hbalbat​ @its-tortle​ @captainjanegay​ @greyhavensking​ @snarky-drabbles​ @joharvele​ @musette22​ @mysterious-marvel​ 
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yoonia · 3 years
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❥ Content Creator Year in Review
☞ tagged by @yeoldontknow, @chillingkoo, @inkedtae, @onherwings, @moononthejoon, @kpopfanfictrash (my precious, talented bubs. I love you! Happy almost New Year!) and retagged by @flurrys-creativity @jimlingss 
⇀ first creation and most recent creation of 2020: I kicked off 2020 with the release of Carousel Epilogue (Yoongi). That was a defining moment for me because it truly felt like I was ending one specific era to start another. Which was true, by the way, because Carousel had marked the rise of my blog at one point and it had been a part of my long journey in writing fanfiction that releasing that epilogue and ending the series then had become a true turning point for me and my blog. My most recent creation was Blurred Lines (Seokjin, ongoing). I never meant this one to be a series, but somewhere in the middle of writing it, I felt like the story needed to progress in small paces to build up the momentum. I have always had a hard time writing for Seokjin, seeing the actual person himself has multiple layers that we tend to misidentify him with the persona he normally shows us in public. I simply wanted to show that part of him in this story, while creating a new persona for Seokjin that I’ve had in mind since way back then when I wrote Hazy. 
⇀ one of your favourite creations from 2020: I’ve mentioned a few favourites a while ago, but the one that sticks to me the most personally was Spotless Minds (Hoseok). I wrote this based on my favourite movie, Eternal Sunshine of The Spotless Minds, taking the original idea of introducing two characters who erased a part of their past but giving it a more in-depth backstory compared to the movie itself. I still added a few elements that you may find from the movie but written here differently: the beach house, the waiting room, the stages where Hoseok was slowly losing his memory, and I added a few things that may help readers who haven't watched the movie to understand the aspects of the story a bit better without having to go back and watch the movie first. What pleases me most about this fic was the writing style that I used then — the sequences of the scenes, the back and forth between the timeline to reveal all the twists and turns — and then putting them all together. It was just fun creating this one.
⇀ a creation you’re really proud of: Oh, this one is the hardest to decide. I can’t choose between We Are All Dreamers (Jungkook) and Never Falling (Jimin). WAAD was a bit challenging to me. I love soulmate aus and I believe I had gotten stuck on this story right in the middle of it until I decided to add Jungkook’s pov in it to help with the story’s progression. I’m proud of how it came to be (and I can’t wait to share the continuing story for it) and how I’d gotten through the process of writing it. NF took me quite a while to finish, but I love every single thing about it. The story building, the tension, the momentum, and I think the characters I created in this story have become the pairing that I have grown to care the most this year aside from Strip!Jimin and his OC.  
⇀ a creation that took you forever: The Half-Lycan (Taehyung) and Of Bears and Bonds (Seokjin). Both stories took a while to work on due to their part in the Shifters series, which required me to take my time in planning and working things together to make sure that the story and the timeline would line up perfectly with its origin story, Blood Moon Rising. THL was actually planned to be posted on Tae’s birthday last year, but it took me 6 months to finish. OBB was planned to be posted immediately as both stories correlated between each other, but then things happened and what was planned to be an extremely long one-shot had ended up becoming a trilogy (the original word count was 69k words lol). 
⇀ a creation from 2020 that received the most notes: The Half-Lycan, I think? I know it went over 2k notes while the others remain somewhere around 1k or less lol Idk man, I don’t keep up with notes. I’m grateful for all the feedback, the reblogs, and the comments, so I remember those the most compared to the numbers. 
⇀ a creation you think deserved more notes: Ravished by Two (Namjoon, Seokjin), Spotless Minds (Hoseok), Red Series (Yoongi). Seriously, I love writing for Hyung line, but they don’t get enough love from everyone :( I must add Bed & Boyfriend(s) (Taehyung, Yoonkook) too because I worked hard on that one and I need it to get some more love lol
⇀ a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it: I’m starting to get into Stray Kidz and Ateez more lately. I haven’t made any creation for them aside from adding Wooyoung (Ateez) as a side character in Spotless Minds haha I did write Simon Says for Simon Dominic though. 
⇀ a creation you made that breaks your heart: Slow and Steady (Jungkook) took the front seat on this one. I’ve fallen in love with the original idea when it was sent to me for a commission. I knew it would cause a lot of heartbreak and it did spark some reactions from my readers that I enjoyed reading through once the fic was up. I just didn’t think it would hurt ME in the process as well :/
⇀ a ‘simple’ creation that you really love: Let’s see… Pay By Play (Jungkook), Red Lipstick (Yoongi, from the Red Series), the drabbles I’ve made this year for Carousel and The Stand-In. Can I really call these ‘simple’ tho? Hahaha 
⇀ a creation that was inspired by another one: Strip! (Jimin) was a spin-off for Bad For You. Though I had originally started this series since October the year before, I still have to mention this one because I only began working on the final chapter after I was done with Carousel at the beginning of the year. The Half-Lycan was actually inspired by its drabbles. I’d never intended to expand Blood Moon Rising’s universe into the series you are seeing now, but when I was writing Rapture during NaNoWriMo 2019, I began to imagine Taehyung and his wolf pack to become a part of Jimin’s story. Since I was already planning to introduce the members as a pack in BMR in future chapters, I decided to link the two universes together and have Taehyung from Rapture to have his own story before I get to introduce the others. This decision was what had led me to create the entire Shifter series universe. 
⇀ a favourite creation created by someone else: umm...I haven’t had a chance to actually read a lot of fanfics this year as I have gotten into original stories more and the year has been crazy busy. The ones that I’ve read and shared are listed in my side blog, @diaficrecs. But here are a few that I’ve read but haven’t gotten a chance to write down my comment or feedback on and they are now sitting on my rec blog’s draft until the day I can get my thoughts together T^T — Inner Needs by @avveh, Divine Intervention by @opaljm, Third Wheeling by @untaemedqueen, Molotov Cocktail by @yeoldontknow, Aphrodite in War by @jungblue, Always Trust In Pixie Dust by @readyplayerhobi, daechwita by @ironicarmy, and I have to mention the one I’ve been re-reading the most, When You Watch by @gardentulips 
⇀ some of your favorite content creators from the year: aside from the beautiful people mentioned above, here are my beloved, talented friends — @jamaisjoons @suqakoo @softyoongiionly @randombtsprincessa @hungline @guktro @underthejoon @gukslut @gukyi @floralseokjin @ladyartemesia @baebae-goodnight @hobidreams
⇀ and for good measure, another couple more creations of yours that you love: omg I don’t think I can mention them one by one so let me just drop my masterlist here, here, and here :) 
⇀ tagging: everyone mentioned above who hasn’t done this yet...and if you don’t see your name here, feel free to do this if you want to and add me so I can add new stuff on my to-read-list :)) 
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