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#she fell for the very thing i thought she’d fear
inuyashaluver · 3 months
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Could we get an enemies -> lovers with Leila Ouahabi ?
liar - leila ouahabi
leila ouahabi x reader
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description: in which a certain left back tackles you dangerously many years ago in the youth teams, giving you an acl injury. you hate each other and nothing will change that…maybe
warnings: swearing, spanish in bold italics
a/n: indeed you can, my love! thank you and enjoy!! ❤️
⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆
you and leila ouahabi had a very difficult relationship. to say the least, you fucking hated each other.
you and leila were always around each other and it made your blood boil. your teammates often told you that your hatred for the girl was a little ridiculous but you wouldn’t relent.
leila on the other hand only hated you because you hated her. she didn’t really understand it but your attitude and mannerisms towards her made you insufferable for her.
it all started in the spanish youth teams, both of you just 15 and as eager as ever. you played in the midfield while leila played left back, she’d mark you occasionally but the two of you wouldn’t really speak. you were friendly with each other, saying hello with a wave when you saw each other at training.
until it all changed. you were all doing a little mini game to asses who would playing competition games and who would be benched. you and leila were considered the best of the best and you both knew it.
you both had an immense amount of respect for each other and the way you both played, that’s why it hurt so much when the hatred grew.
leila was marking you and she managed to get the ball off you through what she thought was a safe tackle, but you screamed in pain and fell to the ground with tears brimming in your eyes. you heard it, the dreaded pop that no one ever wanted to hear. it’s your acl.
“oh my god, (y/n), i’m so sorry-” leila rushes out, you look up at her with a glare, this was your opportunity to represent your country and it was taken from you because of her.
“i don’t want to hear it, ouahabi” you scoff, tearing your gaze away from her face of shock and fear while you get carried off the pitch by alexia and mapi.
from then on, you couldn’t stand leila. everything you’d worked so hard for was taken from you in the span of two minutes. now when the girls played, you’d have to sit in the stands with your crutches.
your scowl was evident on your face everytime leila had the ball. leila had made an immense effort to talk to you, to apologise, to offer you a helping hand but you dismissed her every time, she tried to confide in alexia but she knew you too well.
you were so stubborn and stood your ground, alexia tried to convince you to at least talk to the girl but you refused. it all went downhill from there.
it seemed that you and leila couldn’t get rid of each other. every club you got signed to, she did. you had the same friends, the same interests also but you just couldn’t get passed the fact that she caused you an acl injury.
sure, maybe you were being a little ridiculous but it was a big opportunity for you to gain recognition for spain and you just didn’t get it.
when you both signed to barcelona in 2016, everyone could tell the tension was still the same as it had been since you were both 15. you were both 23 now and you could still cut the tension with a knife.
your teammates desperately tried to get you two to get along, but it just didn’t happen. you’d send each other snarky remarks, filthy looks, the whole works.
it was truly disappointing for your teammates to see how you two just acted like children. the grudge you held being over 8 years long.
the thing is, leila wanted to be friends with you, she always had been. as the years progressed, you blossomed, not only in football but your appearance and intelligence also. she always thought you were beautiful but you only got prettier each day.
you also thought leila was gorgeous, who wouldn’t? that’s what pissed you off more, perfect leila clouding your thoughts completely. your distaste for each other was in reality intrigue and attraction but you and leila would never admit that. ever.
“fucking watch it, ouahabi!” you exclaim as you get slammed to the floor during a mini game in training, “you watch it, idiot” she grumbled, rolling her eyes when you curse her under your breath.
“enough, you’re acting like children!” alexia reprimands, pointing an accusatory finger with a stern expression at both of you. you give her a tight lipped smile and move to stand up, bumping leila’s shoulder with your own.
“ale, she started it” leila groans, hitting your shoulder back with hers, “she pushed me on the ground, ale!” you frown, alexia shook her head at both of you, you were exactly the same.
“and i’ll finish it, i don’t care, all i ask is for one normal training session, you’re adults” she grits, you and leila send each other a little glare before going back to the game.
you have the ball and she manages to get it off you again and you throw your head back in frustration, “oops, sorry” she mocks, winking at you when she passes the ball away.
you give her a little shove and run back up the field and her team gets a goal, her teasing laugh rings in your ears as you watch her celebrate the goal.
in the change rooms that day, you can’t help but look at leila as she changes, her cubby was in your direct view. she was perfect and it made you mad in a way you couldn’t explain.
alexia raises her eyebrows in surprise watching you ogle over her and you stop immediately, heading to the showers with a frustrated sigh.
though, you notice a certain someone in the shower directly across from you, her gaze lingering on your upper back as you showered. your cheeks grow slightly pink, you felt flustered.
“fucking hell, ouahabi, do you have to follow me everywhere?” you bark, leila laughs at you mockingly,
“oh please, princesa (princess) you don’t own the showers” she retorts, you roll your eyes and mutter nonsense that made leila smile secretly. you never change.
you get out the shower and flip her off, she does the same and smiles at you sickeningly sweet, making you shake your head before going to find alexia to complain.
only to receive a lecture that you were being childish, causing leila to walk past you with a teasing grin when she heard you getting scolded.
you played with each other for years at barcelona until you decided you needed a change. you wanted to give the wsl so you could gain some new techniques.
you’d gotten an offer from manchester city and it was just a no brainer to accept it. you signed the contract with a heavy heart but knew it would be refreshing
if only you knew who else got a contract.
it was to your great surprise when you walked into your first training session to see a certain brunette walking in the same time as you.
“you’re fucking joking” you say simply, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath when you see leila wearing the same training kit you were. she laughs, she genuinely laughs and takes in your appearance.
“can’t get enough of me, huh, princesa (princess)?” she smirks, walking up to you full of confidence. you wanted to punch her then and there, but also kiss her but that was right at the back of your mind and should not be acknowledged.
“you wish, clearly you can’t get enough of me because you follow me everywhere” you challenged, standing on your tiptoes to look a little more intimidating and she found it really cute.
“okay, nena (baby)” she shrugs, moving to the door to open it and leaving you behind. your cheeks are burning, she’s never called you that before.
you both get introduced to everyone and got pulled aside by a couple of people, mentioning the undeniable tension between the two of you and you struggled to give them an answer without feeling stupid.
during training, you can’t help but look at leila, the way she moved, the way she looked perfect after a full training session. you were fucked.
leila noticed it immediately, the way your gaze would follow her every move, she loved it, purposefully giving you a little show when she’d flex her arms or lift her shorts up a little higher. she loved to see you nervous, especially because of her.
you were placed on the same team for training activities and you managed to get a goal, “buena niña (good girl)” she says simply from behind you, your legs feel like jelly and you look at her in surprise.
she smirks and sends you a cheeky wink, your body is on fire. you’re supposed to hate her, snap out of it, you thought. but it was extremely hard when she’s looking at you like that and calling you all these pet names.
it was your first game for manchester city and you and leila were starting. it was daunting, your first game for your brand new club when you can’t even think straight due to a certain brunette.
she’s been subtly flirting with you for weeks, sending you cheeky looks, shamelessly checking you out. you couldn’t handle it, you chose not to entertain it but that doesn’t mean you didn’t enjoy it.
leila knew you very well, she knew your mannerisms and knew you enjoyed it, so why wouldn’t she pursue it?
the game was going well, you and leila proved your success in the team and everyone was thoroughly impressed.
you were in the lead 2-0 and the game was clean up until the second half. the other team grew in frustration and began to get sloppy, in their passes, tackles, everything. and unfortunately, you were the one that had to deal with it.
you got tackled by your marker and she studded your ankle, you fall to the floor with a gasp and the whistle blows immediately. the referee shows her a yellow card and you look up in shock to see leila shoving her.
“are you fucking serious?” a shove to the girl’s chest, “are you trying to take her out because she’s better than you or something?” another shove. she’s furious, she watched as you fell to the ground and she just saw red. no one hurts her girl.
the pain subsides, you feel good to continue despite the slight sting. you walk up to leila who’s currently being held back by lauren and grab her hand in yours. you’ve never been so attracted to someone in your life.
she looks down at you in surprise, her eyes scanning your face before dropping to your ankle. “i’m fine, leila” your eyes stare into hers and she reluctantly nods, gripping your hand tightly and sending your marker a little glare as she lets you pull her away.
leila looks down at your joint hands with a hint of a smile and you drop it immediately after following her gaze.
“you’re sure you’re okay?” leila looks right into your eyes in any words to trace for any lies, you nod and give her a small smile.
“i’m okay, thank you” you say softly, she grins and squeezes your shoulder gently “anytime, princesa (princess)” she flirts, walking back to her position and leaving you stunned.
after the game, you hang around after in the change rooms as the girls leave, coincidentally leaving you both there alone. you take a deep breath and walk up to her while she’s lacing her shoes, clearly about to leave.
“i just wanted to say thank you again, for defending me” you say sheepishly, looking anywhere but at her. she chuckles and watches as you squirm nervously. she liked how she had that effect on you.
“looks like you’re getting soft on me, hermosa (beautiful)” she smirks, you huff in frustration and look at her in fake annoyance. “i can’t be nice and express my gratitude?” you argue, leila smiles at your rambling.
“of course you can, you’re different, you know? you’re much nicer” she teases, you roll your eyes at her and cross your arms over your chest as you stare down at her.
“whatever, ouahabi, i still hate you” you grit out, the biggest lie you’ve ever said.
“mentirosa (liar)” she smiles, standing up to be directly in front of you, her eyes flickering between yours. “what?” you breathe out, the proximity making you nervous.
“men-ti-ro-sa” she breaks down each syllable, each one hitting your heart. you look up to drop the eye contact and she grabs your chin gently, directing your gaze back to her eyes.
you were killing her, with your wide eyes and pink cheeks, she couldn’t ignore her feelings anymore.
your hands dumbly drop to your sides as you look up at her, her hand holding your chin moving to cradle your jaw. she takes in your appearance with a gentle smile, her gaze lingering on your lips for a second before looking back into your eyes.
“so beautiful” she starts with a smile, “beautiful but so stubborn” she wrinkles her nose teasingly and you can’t help but laugh a little.
“you’re beautiful” you say earnestly, she grins brightly at that, her teeth catching her bottom lip as she looks at you. “softie” she taunts, leaning forward slightly, your eyes fall to her lips and she takes that as her cue, she moves forward to pull you into a searing kiss.
your hands go around her neck to pull her closer and her free hand rests on your hip, her lips was so warm and weirdly familiar, it feels like you’ve kissed before.
before she deepens it, she pulls away slightly and you whine at the loss of contact. she raises her eyebrows amusingly and smiles at you, “still hate me?” she says playfully,
“no” you whisper against her lips, “not for a while” you move forward to capture her lips in another kiss, conveying every ounce of affection you had for each other.
she took you on a couple of dates and you got together after a very short amount of time. falling into a loving relationship full of so much love you both couldn’t believe it, eventually moving in together in manchester.
you both decided to wait to tell your national teammates, you convinced leila to do so and she could never say no to you when you kissed her and gave her your best puppy dog eyes.
when you both had national duty, your teammates, especially alexia were pleasantly surprised that you weren’t at each other’s throats as usual.
it was until the mini game when you and leila were on opposite teams that you confirmed the relationship.
she tackled you and you fell to the floor, she smiles and holds her hands out to you, “sorry, bebé (baby)” she lifts you off the floor, “it’s okay, mi amor (my love)” you lean forward and place a quick kiss on her lips and the entire team screams in shock.
oh how you wish you had your phone when you saw alexia’s face, she was gagged.
leila laughs brightly and tucks you into her side, making an effort to slide her hand from your waist to your ass before moving back up again.
the way you both looked at each other with nothing but affection had your teammates believing they were hallucinating. “what the fuck is going on?” mapi screams, you and leila giggle before she kisses your temple as you explain the situation.
you and leila couldn’t be happier, and once your teammates saw the love you had for each other, they were ecstatic.
though it did take some getting used to seeing you two making out rather than shoving each other with harsh words but it was refreshing.
⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆ ★ ⋆
you know the drill - just pretend it’s you, ily claudia xx
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liked by alexiaputellas and 44,232 others
leilaouahabi: she’s so cute, she thought she hated me all these years but she was in loveeee
view all comments
yourname: i’m hating you a little right now for exposing me like this
↳ leilaouahabi: i love you?
↳ yourname: i mean, i love you too i guess
↳ leilaouahabi: lindaaaaa (cutie)
alexiaputellas: i knew she always liked you, it was so obvious with her little heart eyes
↳ leilaouahabi: oh same, she’s obsessed with me
↳ yourname: hello? why are we exposing my business?
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rarilight · 7 months
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Tamagotchi - Ficlet ft. Rarity, Twilight, Fluttershy
PROMPT: Fluttershy asks Twilight to bring back her Tamagotchi pet after it accidentally dies
-----
When Fluttershy barged into Golden Oaks, reduced to tears, Twilight Sparkle feared the worst. Somepony had upset her sensitive friend, or a book she'd lent her had been accidentally too sad, or worse, one of Fluttershy's animals had died.
Which they had. Sort of. Kind of.
"Please, Twilight," Fluttershy sniffed, dabbing at her puffy eyes with a tissue. "Please, t-there must be something you can do! I've only had Sorbet for a week, and I promise I've taken good care of him, and--"
Twilight pursed her lips, hesitantly looking over the small purple electronic Tamagotchi. "One minute, let me see what I can do." She turned away from Fluttershy, fiddling with it for a moment before determining that, unfortunately, the battery was likely faulty.
"Well?" Fluttershy pressed. "Did you find out what's wrong?"
"I... I think so, yes," Twilight replied, still looking over the device. "The battery is shot. It's an easy fix, and I even have spares to give you, but... Well. The internal memory of these things usually rely on the battery, so--" She turned around to look at Fluttershy, her sentence petering out at the hopeful expression on her friend's face.
"So?" Fluttershy asked, her ears alert. "So you can bring Sorbet back?!"
Twilight smiled. Awkwardly.
"Ha ha. Well. Er."
Fluttershy's ears fell. Tears bordered her eyes anew. "....Twilight?"
"Yes!" Twilight lied, because she couldn't bring herself to tell Fluttershy that Sorbet was gone.”He’ll be there, just like always!”
“Really?!” Fluttershy gasped.
“Yes! Yep. Yes.” Twilight immediately levitated the Tamagotchi over to a bookcase. “Though, I, uh, need to keep him overnight just to make sure he’ll be okay. Alright?” At Fluttershy’s effusive nodding, Twilight apparated a notebook and pen. “And, uh, why don’t you, er, write down all the information you remember about him? Just so I can make sure the coding didn’t change.”
“Of course!” Fluttershy grabbed the notebook and immediately got to work. “Oh, thank you, Twilight!”
----
It was about three in the morning when Twilight Sparkle finally decided it was time to pass the torch. With bleary, tired eyes, she blinked at the details Fluttershy’d written, and then looked at the creature she’d been painstakingly grinding for hours. It had taken her about sixty-eight reboots to get a creature with the same shape, color, nature, gender, and preferences as the original Sorbet, and she’d only just gotten to the halfway point of matching its experience levels to the original’s. 
Thank Celestia for the book she’d read on using magic to hack devices. There was no other way she’d been able to bypass the time-locked events otherwise. 
To the sound of a big yawn, she walked towards the bed, tiredly rubbing the snoring blanketed lump on the couch. 
“Rarity, it’s your turn.”
“Sssssnore.”
Twilight rolled her eyes. “Rarity.”
“SSSSSNOOOOORE.”
“Come on! Up! Why did you send Fluttershy to get my help if you don’t like my solution?” Twilight chided, far too tired for shenanigans. “And stop that, we both know you don’t snore!”
“SSSSNOOOO—” The blanket came off, and a weary Rarity glared at her friend. “Fine, fine!” She magically snatched the Tamagotchi and frowned at it. “This is ridiculous, Twilight! It’s just a game! Sorbet isn’t even real!”
Twilight arched an eyebrow. “Oh? Do you want to tell Fluttershy that?”
Rarity looked away. “...No.”
“That’s what I thought. So, go!” She collapsed onto the couch and covered herself with blanket. “Level twenty-three. Six gifts pending. The complete sunflower outfit.”
“But the minigame is so difficult, and we already have the hat! Isn’t that enou—”
“Complete. Sunflower. Outfit.”
“But—!”
“SNOOOOORE!!!!”
----
“Oh, Twilight!” Fluttershy exclaimed the very next day, her eyes now filled with happy tears as she pressed button on her little device. “He’s fine! I’m so relieved!” She brought the device to her face and nuzzled it. “Oh, Sorbet, I’m so happy!”
“And everything is as you remember?” Twilight asked, the bags under her eyes matching the ones of Rarity, who was napping on the couch. “Not that it would be different, obviously! Because it’s the same Sorbet as always.”
“He’s just like always,” Fluttershy reassured her, allowing Twilight to finally relax. Or, well, until Fluttershy frowned, peering at her electronic friend. “Oh, that’s strange.”
“Strange?” Twilight asked, alert. “What is?”
Fluttershy blinked. “Oh. It’s just… His favorite fruit was oranges, but now it’s apples?”
“He changed his mind,” Rarity said, immediately, without even missing a beat or even turning around on the couch to look. 
Fluttershy looked at her friends, surprised. “He changed his min—?”
“Yep!” Twilight interrupted. “Yep. They do that. Yep.”
“But he really loved orang—”
“Darling!” Rarity continued. “Considering your crush on dear Applejack, it’s only natural he’d switch to apples, yes? Yes,” she interrupted, poor Fluttershy’s cheeks turning thirty different shades of red. “Problem solv—”
Twilight blinked at Fluttershy. “You have a crush on Applejack?”
“Rarity!” a flustered Fluttershy gasped in return.
“SSSSSNOOOOOOOORE….”
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avocadoguru · 8 months
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He was staring at her in a way no one had in her entire life. She couldn’t read anything in his eyes - not surprise, not fear, not malicious intent - nothing. (wolfrry, werewolf!harry, alpha!harry, ranger!y/n)
Lupus Noctis- Masterlist, Author’s Note & Warnings
Chapter 11 / alternatively, read on wattpad
Chapter 12 (word count: 9k) -updated September 6
“So… did you figure it out, yet?”
Harry didn’t even have time to find it funny, “Why wouldn’t you have said anything to me? This is… What do I do? Does she know? She wouldn’t know yet, would she? I don’t think she knows… Niall, I don’t know how to handle something like this!”
Harry’s emotions were high. And for good reason. What he’d just seen had him shaken. And it also meant that she’d been turned against her will by a psychopath. He was glad he’d murdered James but this would always be a reminder of what had happened and who had done it.
He had been curious about a few little things. The first was obviously the speed at which she’d recovered and then there was her sudden spunk. Her heightened sense of smell was peculiar when she picked out that he was to be making eggs benedict, which should have tipped him off right away. How had she guessed? The sauce wasn’t something that most humans could pick out from a small leak in a jar in a bag full of other more fragrant groceries. 
“What happened that made you realize?”
“I saw her eyes turn golden. Just wish you’d said something.”
Niall had a hunch about her sudden natural reparative abilities, but he couldn’t be 100% sure at the time.“Harry, you have to understand, man. I didn’t say anything because it was either I was wrong or I was right and you’d figure it out anyway. It was better not to say anything if by chance she was just recovering in a way that doesn’t normally happen in humans. Sometimes things do happen that don’t make sense medically. I figured it was better to just wait and see.”
Harry paced, all the way to the furthermost corner of his expansive garden, outside of Y/N’s earshot. His towel tied tight around his waist as he ran his hands through his damp hair, “You could have at least given me a heads up. What do I do?”
Niall breathed out a laugh, “How should I know? I’m a medical doctor! I’m not cut out for emotional therapy. I’ve never dealt with anything like this. But you’ll figure it out.”
“I know. I just… how do I tell her?”
“Harry, again, I don’t know. We’re talking about a human that has been turned and I’m not familiar with all of this. It’s very unconventional. This kind of thing only happens in extremely rare cases and never in my life have I met a human that’s been turned. I’ve heard about it, just never known someone that it happened to. How has she been acting? What caused her eyes to change?”
Harry cleared his throat and looked up at his house, remembering to keep his voice down, “She’s been… very ready to do stuff. Awake. Wants to go for a swim. Is hungry. Um… a little bit bossy with me even.”
Niall hummed into the receiver, “Bossy… and what happened to have her eyes change?”
Harry could almost hear the cheek in his voice, “She was… I think maybe just excited. She’s been in a really good mood since I came back with groceries a bit ago.”
“Right… a good mood. Well, it’s doctor’s orders to take it easy on her. She might be… well… able to tolerate more, but… she’s still recovering. And so are you.”
A scoff fell from Harry’s lips, “Fine. No advice for me then?”
“Sorry, man. Never dealt with anything like this before. As you know, it’s exceptional that anyone would survive being bitten and getting turned. I just think that’s remarkable… The way you’ve been adamant she’s your mate, all this time. She really is your mate. Only your true mate could’ve survived turning for you.”
*
Y/N was onto Harry. She knew that he wasn’t running out to his car just to get something. Sure he ran out the front door but the way he reacted to her standing so close to him was a little out of character. Perhaps, she decided, that he was trying to “behave” and not push her into anything intimate. That made sense. She was still recovering from what she was told were deadly injuries. But that in itself was a mystery to her. She felt fine for the most part. 
She’d unpacked the groceries and left out the ingredients to make the eggs benedict when Harry was in the shower. But getting interrupted by the way he had groaned and then, the thing that had started to become a big question at the front of her mind, was his scent. It was his natural musk but she could smell him from all the way downstairs in the kitchen while he was in the shower. It was his groan, however, that had her feet carrying her upstairs to check on him. Just to see. 
She didn’t know why he’d suddenly become so timid with her. Why he was shying away from her. It was subtle but she noticed it. 
When he came back inside, dawning only the towel he tucked around his waist he slowed his movements as he saw her standing there with a knowing look on her face.
“What happened?”
Harry tilted his chin up to feign more confidence than he was feeling in her presence suddenly. It was as if he was looking at her with new eyes. She was like him now and her senses would pick apart the subtlest changes, “I thought I’d left the butter in the car. Wouldn’t have wanted it to melt.”
Y/N narrowed her eyes at him as he walked past her into the kitchen, “But you didn’t go to your car.”
Harry clenched his jaw and stopped in his tracks. It was going to be difficult to pretend he didn’t know what was going on but he wanted to wait a little longer before telling her in hopes of her figuring it out herself. Or, in any case, he needed to figure out a way to ease her into this. He didn’t want her to freak out, or be by herself when she did figure it out. But he needed time to process it himself; all he knew was that he couldn’t just blurt it out to her out of nowhere. 
He hated to have to go right back to keeping secrets from her again, especially such a huge one, and especially something that affected her directly. By some miracle he didn’t lose her, she was still there with him by choice, he just couldn’t handle losing her for good if she took to the news badly. Which she had every right to… just as much as she’d had every right to be as upset with him as she’d been just a little while back. He thought back then that he’d lost her for good. And now he had to prepare himself for the possibility of having his heart broken all over again.
The way he handled this was crucial. A wrong move and he could fuck it all up forever. He needed to tread carefully.
He looked at her with squinted eyes, “How do you know I didn’t check the car?”
Y/N paused. She had been feeling like her senses were somehow heightened. Her hearing, her sense of smell… She pondered his question as he continued walking into the kitchen. Looking at his broad shoulders and his back had her wishing he hadn’t run off when he did. 
“It’s kind of weird, you know… I’ve been, like, experiencing these weird things. I can hear so clearly and my sense of smell is…” she thought back to the panties she found but decided to keep that bit of information until the time was right, for later, “and I don’t know what it is. Maybe it’s all in my head? I feel like maybe I should call Niall…”
Harry watched her carefully as she mulled over everything and he pulled out two eggs from the carton before she continued, “So when I couldn’t hear the car door, I guess I just assumed…” She scoffed, hearing herself out loud. She sounded like a nutcase. Of course she wouldn’t be able to hear the car door all the way from upstairs. “Sorry. I’m being weird. But… right now I’m actually starving so if that butter made it alive let’s eat.”
Harry had Y/N heat the hollandaise while he prepared the rest of the ingredients. But she was clearly still mulling over their interaction upstairs. He noticed her eyes dragging down his bare chest and stopping at his crotch repeatedly. And he could tell she was not only hungry for food but she also had a bit of an appetite for something carnal as well. 
He cleared his throat when he turned to find her leaning on the island and watching him, “Gonna burn the sauce.”
Her grin was playful and Harry felt his blood heat up as she spoke, “Turned it off already. The lid will keep it warm.” She didn’t remove her gaze from him. She was making it very clear what she wanted and he wondered if she was aware of what she was doing or not. 
As much as he’d have loved to have bent her over the kitchen island and take care of his girl the way she needed he couldn’t allow that. Not until they at least had a real conversation. About what she’d seen. About how she was feeling. 
When she began to walk toward him she realized it was like something was just drawing her to him. She wanted to… what did she want? Breakfast was nearly ready and she was very hungry, and yeah, she wanted to eat but what she really wanted was to bite him. Just to nip his shoulder or his neck. His pecs. She didn’t know why her urge was so strong but the moment she was close enough to touch him Harry stood up straight and he looked away from her sultry gaze, “Uh, I’m just gonna go and get dressed and then we’ll eat.”
Breakfast was tasty. It was nourishing and filled her belly, mostly. She felt like she could eat more but Harry’s scent and his hands and his lips were distracting. And the way he kept keeping her at arm’s length had her feeling even more insatiable for him. She knew he was doing it because he was worried about hurting her but she was going to explode if he didn’t do something. 
Turning to face his pretty girl he nearly gave in right then and there, seeing the ravenous look in her eyes. He could practically read her mind, that’s how loud she was thinking those dirty thoughts. And he wanted to give in, he wanted to kiss her, hold her, feel her body against his. Taste her… He shook his head as he got off the stool and pulled himself away reluctantly, grabbing their dirty dishes.“Let’s go for a swim. Like you wanted. I think I know a great place. Secluded. Not in the preserve.” Harry rinsed the dishes as he spoke. He could feel her eyes burning into his back but he needed to keep moving, keep his thoughts from wandering too far. Distract her if he could. He felt he could use a swim himself. Get out some of his pent-up emotions and energy.
“That sounds great, actually,” she grinned and lifted herself up to sit on the counter next to where he was washing the dishes, “I feel like I need to move and exert some energy. A little exercise would be good I think. A swim.”
*
The drive to the new spot wasn’t as quick as it would have been if they’d driven to the preserve and parked and hiked up to their special hidden oasis. But they both knew they couldn’t go back there. Maybe ever. Y/N stopped herself from initiating conversation the whole drive there, and she could tell Harry was holding back, too. She just wasn’t quite ready to address all of that; she at least wanted to go for this swim first. That would hopefully make her feel a bit better. She felt absolutely fine apart from the fact she felt she didn’t fit into her own skin. She was aching to move, burn some energy off, and she suspected it was due to the fact that she was sexually frustrated.
Y/N decided to google her symptoms to pass the time quicker on their drive to this new, secluded place Harry had suggested. She was not quite understanding the way she was able to smell everything so clearly. She typed in sudden heightened sense of smell into the search bar. Scrolling through the various results and webmd articles she landed on something that might explain the strange phenomenon. 
Synesthesia could be the answer. It wasn’t uncommon for people that had gone through life-threatening injuries. She wasn’t 100% sure that was what was causing her to smell and hear things she would have never been able to before but at least it was some kind of answer. Something to ask Niall about when she did finally talk to him about all this.
Harry parked his car off the road and tucked away behind large pines and in the grass. It was miles from the preserve and in an area where the mountains were not protected or worked by the rangers. Some of it was privately owned land that hadn’t been touched in decades. 
“The swimming cove is a spot I used to come to when I had time to waste and wanted to venture away from the preserve.” Harry spoke as he grabbed her bag from her, putting it over his shoulder and began walking toward the fence that clearly meant the area was off limits. 
The overgrowth of vines and grass indicated that no one had been in these parts in a very long time. Which put Y/N at ease. She followed him, scaling the fence easily and trekking through the acreage close behind.
The upward hike was off trail and cumbersome but once they began making their way down into the valley from where they’d hiked Y/N saw the ridges of the mountain and a level area below with a ravine.
“Your sense of direction is astonishing,” she commented as they carefully trekked down toward where they could hear the water flowing, “But I guess that makes sense, doesn’t it? You’re a…” she stopped just before she could say the word. She still had to get used to that idea. That he was a werewolf. Part human, part beast. 
Harry turned to look at her, stopping his pace suddenly as he raised his brows at her, “A werewolf? Is that what you were going to say?”
Nodding her head she shrugged, “Yeah. I wasn’t sure if you wanted to be called that. Or… I don’t know. Is it okay to say it?”
The gentle smile that took over his features told her it was, though he didn’t respond to her question with words. 
Looking down to the sandy portion of the ravine Harry pointed, “Just there. It’s beautiful once you see it from the ground. Come on.”
Y/N was wearing her hiking boots while Harry was in his signature chelsea boots, making the descent to the cove look like child’s play. She was now hyper aware of why he was so good at hiking and trekking and staying steady even in such posh shoes. Everything that had suddenly come to light about what he really was had answered so many questions for her. 
But the moment they were standing in the wet sand before the cove where the ravine led, all her thoughts about what Harry was had vanished. Another breathtaking spot with not a single human soul to be seen.
Harry placed their bags on the rocks to keep them dry and began to take his boots off as he watched Y/N curiously. He had been careful not to allow her to over exert herself but she was easily keeping up with him and she seemed fine. She was fine. Her heartbeat was steady and strong, her body had barely broken out in a sweat and she had a wide smile on her face as she looked around.
“Harry, this is… it’s perfect!” She was eager to move her limbs in the cool water. Feel the weightlessness take over and play around with Harry.
She looked over at him as he was undressing, taking his clothes off, his boots already on the rocks next to the bags. So she followed suit. Taking her own boots off and peeling her pants down her legs. 
Harry was already jumping into the water by the time Y/N had stuffed her shirt onto the pile of clothes. Looking down over her body she did see the awful scar. The wound was healed but the remnants of what had happened was obvious. She hesitated to remove her bra as she brushed a hand over the raised skin.
“Everything okay?” Harry called to her. She looked out toward him, handsome with wet hair as he came in closer to her. 
“Yeah. Just… saw this and…” she ran her fingers from the top of her clavicle downward over the scar to under her breast, “I guess I feel lucky to even be alive. Here with you.”
She kept her eyes on his as she unhooked the back of her bra and removed it. 
Harry watched her as she bent down and took her panties off. He was already hard just seeing her bare body but the scar across her chest kept him in check. She was still recovering. Still figuring out what was going on. 
The somber moment was suddenly over the minute she jumped into the water next to Harry and began to laugh. The water was frigid but it felt fantastic. Normally she would feel discomfort but right now her body was adjusting to it just fine, feeling invigorated and alive.
Stretching her limbs in the water she ducked her head under to swim closer to Harry and grasped his wrist.
Harry pulled her up and she tugged his arm around herself. Both grinning ear to ear with the closeness. He was just glad she was feeling playful. That she wasn’t upset or hurt by what had happened. At least in that moment she wasn’t. He knew she’d have lots of questions for him. Knew they needed to have a conversation but for now the light hearted moment was the only thing he could focus on. And her warm skin against his.
She was more than just playful though. She was horny and Harry knew it. Having her naked in the cool water of a private cove in the mountains was risky. Because he was turned on too. And he knew he was asking for trouble with this scenario. It evoked memories of their time together at the oasis in the preserve.
He could resist her for only so long. She was laying it on thick in his house during breakfast and now with his clothes off and his obvious erection it would be even harder to resist her. 
Harry pulled his arm away and began to swim backwards, gliding through the water smoothly, putting some distance between himself and the girl. 
“Where are you going?” She laughed and began to swim toward him slowly.
Harry shook his head and feigned innocence, “What do you mean? Just swimming is all,” he bit the inside of his cheek to tamper the playful grin on his face.
Instead of continuing after him she decided she’d lure him to her. She ducked under the water again, kicking her feet out and splashing as she maneuvered under the water before surfacing, bouncing out just enough that her breasts were visible to him. 
She watched him closely as she pushed herself back and stretched her arms to float at the surface. The tranquility of having her ears tucked under the water, muffling all the sounds that surrounded them, and floating in the mountain chilled water on her back was just like being back at her oasis. She smiled to herself and peeked an eye at Harry. To her delight, he was already watching her closely.
His eyes were clearly taking in her soft breasts with tightened nipples perking above the water. She wouldn’t tease him too much but she wanted his hands on her. Wanted his attention. Wanted him to give in to her. She knew what he was doing. Knew he was trying to keep his distance because she needed to heal. But that just made her want him more. His gentlemanly and thoughtful attempts to keep her healthy and the way he was doing it because he cared for her. Denying himself something she knew he wanted as a way of protecting her. 
Harry decided to peel his eyes from her body and float on his back too. He needed to straighten out his thoughts and get his mind out of the gutter. He closed his eyes and tried to train his dirty thoughts away. He knew his body was calling him to take care of his natural urges with his mate. And now that she was like him… she was very likely made exactly for him in every way. 
But he couldn’t just act on his desires. He didn’t want to hurt her and he was sure if they did have sex she’d display even more evidence of being like him and that could scare her. If she somehow dropped her fangs in the middle of her orgasm or her claws came out while he was pounding into her – yeah, his thoughts weren’t helping. All of that sounded absolutely delightful and he’d love to feel her fangs puncture into his skin, or have her claw up his back and chest. 
“Harry,” he heard her voice speak his name and he popped his eyes open, dropping the lower half of his body back into the water and letting his toes scrape along the rocky sand.
She saw the way his erection was bobbing just above the water every time his chest inhaled and he floated upward the tiniest bit. And then his eyes on hers were dark. She could almost hear his heart pounding in his chest, not unlike her own wildly pumping heart.
Something in her decided to cut the shit. She was feeling bold. Feeling like he wanted exactly what she wanted and as nice as it was to be cared for and protected by him she wanted him to fuck her. She wanted him to hold her in his arms and to give himself to her once and for all. 
“Stop this,” she spoke matter-of-factly as she swam around his body. “I can see clearly how affected you are by me.” 
Touching his shoulder she moved her finger down over his tattoos and to his pecs, thumbing at his nipple and watching his eyes, “I’m okay. Really. You don’t have to keep holding off and denying yourself, Harry.” She moved herself in front of him and draped her arms over his shoulders.
Without another thought, Harry’s hands moved down to her waist as he pulled her in closer to him, “I want you healthy is all. And I think we have a lot to talk about.”
Nodding her head she agreed. That was true. They needed to talk. But something inside of her needed something physical. She needed it to uncloud her brain and give her some kind of clarity. She couldn’t explain it, she just knew she needed it. More than a talk. As important as that was, she was sure she wouldn’t ever be able to focus on anything he told her if he didn’t fuck her first.
“Yes. We will talk. But I don’t know how to explain the way I feel in this moment, how much I need you.” She bit her lip and pushed her hips to his, his cock firm on her thigh, “It’s kind of painful actually.”
Harry could feel her warm against his prick as he looked down to see her breasts grazing against his chest. Painful? Yes, perhaps she was feeling that natural physical urge to release just like he was. That’s how it was for his kind, though he was used to it. Used to the pain of holding off and not allowing himself to indulge right away. She was not used to the way it felt. The ache that wasn’t just from being horny. It was something deep and raw. A biological and natural instinct his kind, their kind possessed. 
He knew the pain well. Knew it could be pushed down and she’d be okay. But she was new to all this. And even with the water around them he could smell how intensely she needed him. Needed him to soothe her. And he was the only one that could provide that for her too. He knew that even if she masturbated she wouldn’t be fully comforted. It would pacify her for a bit. Maybe an hour but she wouldn’t be fulfilled. She wasn’t going to feel better until he took care of her. But he needed to be careful. 
“I think you need to recover first, kitten.” Harry let the little nickname he’d given her so long ago slip out. Or maybe he’d done it on purpose. There was something about her that was feeding into his own urges. She was drawing them out of him with just her eyes. The change in her was so deep and it tangled with his own impulses and senses that he could barely think straight. He was more drawn to her than he’d ever been and he knew it was because of the change. Because she was like him now. His perfect match. 
“Harry,” she spoke softly as she kept her eyes on his, a hand moving over his warm chest, “I trust you. I know you would never hurt me and I can tell you need it too. You need me just as much.”
She could just sense his need. And it wasn’t just the fact that he had an erection. She knew it before all that. She felt it back at his house. Something between them had shifted and it was as if she could anticipate his needs without him having to tell her or show her.
His teeth ached to kiss her and to bite her. A carnal and spiritual feeling overwhelmed him. His willpower was incredible but there was only so much he could take. He was as weak as any man and her wolf was luring his out to play. Perhaps he could be gentle. She needed him. She needed him. 
He grasped the back of her head and his lips found her mouth. The kiss was hot and electric  and wild. She lifted a thigh up to his hip and he used his free hand to keep it in place, pasting their hips together.
The whimper that fell from his mouth had her grinning and feeling powerful. She grasped onto his shoulders and let the weightlessness of the water aid her in lifting her other leg to wrap around his hips. Harry groaned and brought his other hand down to keep her thighs held up in place.
Their naked bodies were in sync as he began to walk her out of the water and to the small spot where the sand met the craggy rocks. He’d take care of her. Make love to her gently and soothe her ache. Soothe his own ache. 
Their mouths never parted as he walked out of the water and carefully placed her down into the sand, his knees falling into the granules as he put himself between her thighs. With her legs open he could smell her in a way that was overwhelming. He groaned and licked into her mouth before parting from the kiss with a gasp.
The scar on her chest and over her neck had him filled with jealousy and hatred. He was glad he’d killed James for even placing a finger on his girl. His lips pressed over her scar just above her breast and she ran her fingers into his long hair as he pecked wet kisses along the skin that had been forever marred. 
“I’m going to make it better,” he whispered between kisses, “Make you feel whole again. Give you everything you need. Show you what it means to be mine…”
She closed her eyes and threw her head back as his mouth worked upward slowly and over the skin on her neck. His tongue laved softly and his lips grazed over the sensitive spots that were still healing. She had never felt such need before in her life. Sure she’d been horny before and had never been more turned on by anyone the way she was with Harry. But this was different. Something else was at play and she didn’t have the mind to dwell on it. She only knew that she needed him.
“Please…” she breathed out her plea as his warm mouth soothed her flesh and his nose nudged at her jaw.
“Hurts doesn’t it?” He continued kissing every inch of her scar as he pushed her back down into the sand, “I’m the only one that can make it better.”
She knew it was true. Whatever was happening in her could only be quieted by him.
Nodding her head she spread her legs further, hoping he’d put her out of her misery and fuck her into oblivion, “Harry, please…”
He looked down over her soft body and the scars, and felt emotions rise in his heart. He hated James even in his death, but he was beyond grateful that she was still his. That she was alive. He would worry later about the guilt and the real issue at hand. His own urges and her excruciating need were beckoning to be dealt with immediately. He could practically feel the ache in her body. Her tummy was emanating heat and he felt bad that she was in such pain. She wasn’t used to this level of arousal and need yet. She would learn to deal with it eventually but for now he would give her relief.
Her cry of pleasure was loud, echoing off the rocks of the cove that surrounded them as he placed his mouth on her throbbing pussy, already pulsing and clenching and dripping. 
The sting of her fingers pulling at his hair had him growling into her with delight. He could tell she was urging him in harder but he was going to resist doing anything hard or painful. That would come later. When he was certain she was ready for it. 
His tongue was wide and flat as he tugged it up and down her slick cunt. She was so wet he was certain he couldn’t possibly lick it all up and the flavor was just like before but now it tasted truly nourishing to him. He held her thighs apart gently as he dove into her like she was a meal. Licking and sucking at her bits. 
She writhed and moaned, her hips lifting off the sand and bucking into his face making him nearly lose his grip on her thighs. She was strong. He shouldn’t have been surprised but he was still getting used to the notion that she was like him now. 
“Fuck… yes…” she cooed loudly as his scalp was on fire from the way she was yanking his hair.
Harry didn’t lift his mouth to chuckle or respond and taunt her like he wanted. He needed to make her come so he kept his lips at work on her pussy.
When he began to kiss her clit and pull at it with the smallest nip she squealed and cried out his name as her thighs attempted to close around his head. He held her down but he didn’t want to hurt her so he moved his palms up to grip the underside of her knees to keep her legs pressed down.
She continued bucking as her muscles tensed and her moans grew louder. His nose and mouth and chin were shiny and sticky with her as he rubbed his nose into her clit and stuck his tongue into the opening and past her little muscle, the slick gushing noises the only  background sound to her gasps and soft pants.
Harry was feeling his own cock leak and throb. Just tasting her and knowing how good he was making her feel was putting him on edge. He swallowed down her arousal and took a gasp of breath before putting his face back into her cunt for more.
She’d never felt it like this before. Something far more intense was happening in her body and she didn’t know if it was because it was her first orgasm since she nearly died or just knowing that Harry was a werewolf and he was probably enjoying the taste of her in a way she never realized before. That all those times he’d told her how much he liked her scent and her taste, he wasn’t just saying it to make her feel good, he actually meant it. Or just knowing that he was a werewolf in general… probably all of the above. 
When her orgasm snapped over her body she tightened her grip on his hair he grunted into her pussy in pain, but it didn’t stop him from lapping at her and sucking her clit. She was shaking so hard and pulling at his hair so tight that he was having a hard time moving his mouth over her the way he wanted. Instead, she was moving his face over her soft crease and clit the way she wanted. 
Her cries were loud. It almost sounded as if someone was hurting her. Like she was wailing in pain and anguish. Harry understood that this was because of her intense need to release. Her first release as a werewolf by the hands of her lover. Her mate. He rolled his eyes into the back of his head in ecstasy of his own. He’d not come but he could. His own cock was neglected and hot and if he allowed it, he’d come all over himself and the sand below. But he wanted to come inside of her. He wanted to feel her around him and he knew she was going to want it. 
The part of him that wanted to wait and to talk first was already a distant memory left back in his kitchen. His instincts and his wolf had taken over at that moment.
He felt her release his hair as she sighed, wiggling underneath him.
Y/N grabbed at him, pulling him up and over her, “Want you inside me, right now. Do it while I’m still pulsing around nothing.”
Harry was beyond trying to fight this, eating her out had driven him over the edge. He was determined to give her everything she wanted and luckily for him, it was exactly what he wanted as well. The way she’d clawed at him to get him on top of her made him feral, he wondered if she was realizing the amount of force she’d just exerted in doing so, but he couldn’t dwell on it for too long, not when he looked down at her and she looked like she was going to howl with how much she wanted it. 
She yanked him against her lips and devoured his mouth, licking her arousal off of him and humming profusely, and in turn, Harry didn’t waste a single moment longer before sinking himself into her juicy cunt. The cry she let out was akin to an injured wolf’s and he knew he wasn’t hurting her, she was just giving in to her natural instincts now. That of letting him dominate her completely. 
He pulled back a bit to watch her and when she opened her eyes and her golden irises flashed at him he groaned loudly, allowing his own to take over. Her mouth fell agape and she reached to push his hair out of his face to take him all in better while he slowly but steadily fucked into her. “Harry… your eyes. They’re beautiful. You’re beautiful. You’re exactly who and what you should be, I’m so damn lucky,” she rolled her eyes to the back of her head in ecstasy and Harry thought his heart was going to burst at the amount of love he felt for her. 
He didn’t know how it was possible he now loved her even more than before, but being wanted and loved for exactly who he was turned out to be a lot more important to him than he’d thought it would be. He thought he could hide this side of him from her forever and be fine with it, and he’d have done it gladly to keep her. But having it all out into the open and her so accepting of it was something he’d never even allowed himself to hope for. 
Well, almost everything out into the open. And god, was she beautiful too. She’d always been, of course, but now that she was like him it did things to him he couldn’t even explain. And it looked so right, so natural. Like she was always meant to be a werewolf. He couldn’t wait to watch her discover everything and come into her own completely. He only wished she’d accept it and embrace it fully.
He was snapped out of his reverie when she nipped at his neck and that only made him drive into her more urgently. Noting it had stung a bit too much, his eyes landed on her mouth and he could see her pointy canines pinching her plump lower lip, a bit of blood coating it.
The sight made him almost come then and there, making him moan and slow his pace a bit to regain focus. As much as he wanted to drag it out and go at it for hours, he needed to milk another orgasm from her and hopefully satiate her craving for a bit, because this was rapidly escalating and getting out of hand. She was completely giving into her natural instincts; and if she noticed any of the signs she was presenting she’d freak out and that was not the way he wanted her to find out.
He flipped her over as though she weighed nothing, not having to hide his natural strength from her anymore and began pounding into her in earnest. He was close, so close, and he knew she was too with how she moaned and whimpered and called out his name repeatedly. But he didn’t want to knot into her just yet, he first needed to explain that to her, plus this wasn’t really the setting for it, he wanted to be able to cuddle with her like that in his expensive bedding back at home, not on this rocky terrain that was sure to leave some bruises on her as it was. He knew she could take it now, he’d of course never have allowed it had she still been just human, but even so, she was recovering, and he didn’t want her feeling any discomfort. 
“Please come inside me, Harry. I don’t care. I need it... I can’t explain how much–fuck, how much I need it.”
She needn’t have worried, she wasn’t in heat (yet), so it wasn’t risky like that, but of course she’d worry about getting pregnant. Yet another reason why he needed to find a way to tell her, to avoid all the unnecessary worry on her part. For now, though, he was going to enjoy spilling into her warm cunt, because he needed it just as much. His eyes caught glimpse of her hands she’d rested her smushed cheek against, and her sharp nails were on display. Her much sharper nails. He couldn’t wait for her to claw at his back using them soon, but right now he needed to make sure she didn’t notice them. He grabbed her by her elbows and pulled her back against him, holding her hands behind her back with one arm and snaking the other to her front, finding her clit as he kept thrusting into her from this new angle.
She was already on edge and it only took her a few moments to reach her peak, crying out and letting her head fall back against his shoulder. The sight of the mark on her neck that she probably didn’t even notice wasn’t lost on him though, that was something that would always taunt him, knowing it was someone else’s bite that marked her. But he could claim it as his now, because she was, she was his. It was his cock she was pulsing around, his arms she was falling back into, his name she was whimpering- and so he allowed himself to bite over her mark as he finally gave in to his most primal urge- that of claiming her completely, while he let go and finally filled her up to the brim.
She didn’t even feel the sting of it, she was that far gone; if anything, it was pleasurable for her- as it should be. And for Harry? It was the hardest he’d ever come in his life. His fangs deep into her delicate neck and his cock even deeper into her perfect pussy, she was made just for him, and now she was his in every sense of the word.
With breaths heaving and soft gasps, Harry kept her tight against his chest. He wanted to tell her everything. Wanted so much for her to know what he was thinking. What had just happened to her. What she could expect and that it would only get better and better. If she thought that was intense…
And it was. She didn’t know how to describe the ecstasy, the relief… But it was more than just physical. Everything in and around her felt lighter and more lovely. She was happier than she’d ever been, she felt. She had a sudden urge to run and play; something she hadn’t felt in many years. It was as if being with Harry, everything just made more sense.
With a laugh she wiggled out of his arms and ran back into the water, diving in and swimming out toward the middle, only emerging with a sharp inhale for breath when her lungs needed air.
Harry couldn’t help but look at her in awe. His heart throbbed in his chest with love for her. 
“Come on! Get back in!” Y/N shouted and began to glide through the water.
Shaking his head with a laugh he walked back into the icy water and then dove under to meet her in the center of the small cove. 
She kept her eyes on the water, waiting for him to emerge but she felt his hand on her ankle before she saw him. With a yelp, she laughed and ducked under to pull at him.
Harry wrapped his arms around her body and pushed them both upward to the surface together. The lighthearted moment suddenly halted as they kept their gazes locked. Y/N moved her arms over his shoulders and drew her face in close to his, brushing their noses together, “I’m so glad I’m here with you. I’m glad I’m alive. I’m glad you’re alive. I don’t know what I would have done. I thought I lost you and that’s the last thing I remember before…” she paused, feeling herself get emotional she swallowed her tears, “It just feels like… destiny to be here with you.”
He could feel and hear her heart beating in her chest and he knew she could feel his do the same. It was as if his whole life had all been leading him to this moment. He knew that this woman was his mate. He’d always known it. Maybe ever since the first night he laid eyes on her in the woods all that time ago. Despite the fact that she had a gun pointed at him, there was just something about her. Something that he knew was different. He belonged to her before he ever met her. 
“I’m so glad you’re here too. That we’re here together,” he looked down at her beautiful face as he continued, “I was ready to kill everyone when I thought you weren’t going to make it. Niall said there was no hope. That it was… too late for you,” he inhaled a shaky breath remembering the state she was in just days ago.
“Tell me about what happened. Everything I don’t know about, before, and after the fight. I want to know what happened.”
Harry began to describe the day he was taken and how he’d been outnumbered. He told her why it’d come down to that, about James’ and Irina’s involvement, the way the elders didn’t listen to him having already made up their minds and weren’t going to give him a fair trial.
But with Y/N’s quick thinking and by her reaching out to Niall a chain of events was set off that actually helped matters. 
“Lester is a pack leader too, as you know now. The Pack of the Western Plains. He has connections all over. He’s very well respected. So, with his resources he made it so that there was a trial at the very least.”
“And Eddie too? He was there.” She said, remembering the events of that day. 
“Yes. He was finally able to shift back into his human form. Because of you,” Harry brought a hand up to her face and gently brushed his knuckles over her temple.“I expected that no matter how the trial ended there would be a fight to the death. And I was certain that no matter how many drugs they’d given me or that they’d left me without food and water that I would be able to do away with James rather easily. But I was weakened. Significantly. It’s the only reason he even had the chances he did. It’s why he got in a few good tears. Had I been in my normal shifted state he would have never been able to penetrate my skin and I would have killed him within the first thirty seconds. And he knew that. So did everyone else.”
“They all let you fight like that? Did your pack not respect you as their alpha?”
Harry sighed and nodded, “They never respected me. They were always very rigid in their beliefs. They preferred the old ways of doing things. Most packs nowadays are more open and lenient. There are still strict rules we have to follow but tolerance is practiced these days. Not my pack… my old pack.” 
“Are you worried they’ll come back and try to hurt you?” 
Putting his arms around her low back protectively he pressed his forehead to hers, “I am. I’m worried they’ll try to hurt you too.”
“Even though you’ve given up the pack? And you won the fight?”
“Yes. I wouldn’t put it past them. I’ll do anything I can to protect you,” Harry paused and leaned back to look at Y/N again, “Which is why I think it would be good for us to visit Lester and Alma at the farm for a while. Get away from here for a bit. Just until we can get our bearings and heal.”
The smile on her face gave Harry relief. He wasn’t sure she’d be up for it, but she’d been surprising him since she woke up from her coma. 
“That sounds like a really good idea. I’d love to spend more time with Eddie too.”
His heart continued to lob in his chest wildly. She was more than perfect for him in every way. He couldn’t contain his joy to have her in his arms, “He’d love that. Edward is very fond of you. And he was there, at Niall’s practice. With all of us while you were in that bed. He was devastated.”
Y/N nodded and felt awful about putting anyone through such distress. She knew it wasn’t her fault but she could imagine what it would have been like to watch a friend or lover unconscious in bed and not know if they’d come out of it or not.
“... And you? How did you deal with me being in that bed?”
Harry shook his head and let his eye contact falter for a moment as he thought back to how completely ruined he felt, “Felt like I would die if you didn’t make it. Like I couldn’t breathe or eat. I talked to you all day. Kept myself close by your side and encouraged you to wake up. Made sure you were comfortable in the bed even though I knew you couldn’t really feel anything. I didn’t know what to do. Niall kept telling me it was impossible–” Harry inhaled a sharp breath and tried to calm his emotions but his eyes began to fill with tears with just the memory of how utterly hopeless everything felt. 
“Hey,” Y/N moved her hands to cup Harry’s face, “I’m right here. And I’m very much alive. We both are. I’m not going anywhere. You saved me.” 
Swallowing his tears he blinked and forced the smallest smile, “And you saved me. If it weren’t for you I would be dead right now.”
Y/N leaned in to kiss the gorgeous werewolf. She couldn’t believe she’d gotten so lucky to have him in her life. That he wanted her. She only felt more connected, in tune with him. It was as if the accident had altered something in her soul. She was changed. She figured it was love.
Harry pinched her hip softly and pulled away from the kiss. He couldn’t help it. He needed to be honest with her. He’d told her his truth when she was asleep but now that she was wide awake and in his arms he knew he had to say it that very moment or he’d suffocate, “I love you, Y/N.”
Her lips parted at his admission and she was suddenly aware of her body against his and the way his heart was rapidly throbbing in his chest at the same pace as her own. She felt as if she’d heard him say it to her before. That this wasn’t the first time. 
She gripped his biceps tight and felt herself shiver at the intensity of his bright green eyes. He loved her. He truly did and she felt it deep in her spirit. Without a doubt, he loved her.
“Harry, I love you too. So much,” she gasped as he squeezed her tight to his chest and felt him purring against her own. The comfort that brought to her was consuming. She sighed and held him tight, her cheek smushed into his shoulder.
Everything around them was dizzy and soft. She was safe in his arms. She was safe with her lover. 
When he pulled back a bit and let his head fall back, inhaling sharply and then howling loudly, Y/N gasped in excitement and couldn’t hold back her tears of joy. She smiled widely looking at Harry in his element, expressing happiness freely and it made her own heart flutter. He looked back at her, his wide smile matching her own, the echo of his wolfish howl still resounding in the cove, and she’d never seen him look happier. 
She’d done that. Just by loving him. 
The sudden vibrating in her own chest startled her. She looked up at Harry whose eyes were wide as he looked down at her. 
“Harry– what…?” She looked down at her bare body, putting a small bit of distance between herself and Harry. The vibrating stopped suddenly as she put a hand up to her chest and looked into the crystal water surrounding them and reflecting the sky above and both their faces. 
But then she stilled completely, the ripples on the surface cleared away and she focused on the features of her face, being mostly drawn to the bright golden irises staring back at her in the reflection of the water.
In stunned silence she looked up at Harry before looking back into the water again.
He knew it was only a matter of time. He just hadn’t expected it to happen like this.
A/N: (@fkinavocado and @gurugirl here) The long awaited update is here! Thank you for sticking with us! 
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lovelywritinglady · 11 months
Note
can you do uzui x reader where yn hade a miscarriage and is in a depressive state thank you
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Miscarry
Uzui Tengen x fem!Reader
ANGST, mentions of miscarriage, implied relationship with the other 3 wives, mentions of depression/depressive thoughts, mentions of blood.
First person pov
The day was crisp and the air was fragrant with the smell of freshly bloomed cherry blossoms. It was a perfect day to go walking around the large estate that my husband and my wives and I live at. I’m currently four months pregnant with a baby. All of us are excited for them. I’m the first one of the girls to get pregnant by Lord Tengen. He’s been such a caring husband to be over the course of these four months. I know I have sometime to go, but I’m already so in love with them.
The sun was beginning to set and the vibrant colors of the day were shining through like a glorious painting. I always loved the sunset it made me appreciate the day before the night. For night was when the demons come, but my husband is a hashira, so I have nothing for fear. He was not home and neither were my wives at the moment. The only ones here were me and our housekeeper that my husband payed to stay over to keep and eye on me. Her name was She’s an older woman who has been working for us for a few years. She’s had children of her own and had even given me a few tips for when my child comes to this world. So I was thankful for her being there with me.
I began walking back to my beautiful home when our cat Mochi ran underneath my feet causing me to trip. Using my reflexes I caught myself before I fell on my stomach but the fall was still painful because I fell on the sharp rocks that lay around my house.
“Damn cat, you’re lucky you’re cute and I love you.” I exclaimed to Mochi
“Lady Y/N are you alright?” Mrs. Misaki exclaimed as she ran down the steps to help me up.
“I’m quite alright the cat ran underneath my feet, but I caught myself.” I assured her
“I’m very glad you caught yourself, but you need to be more careful.” She sternly told me as her hand touched my belly gently.
“Yes Mrs. Misaki I promise I will.” I said smiling at her protectiveness.
“Come on in I made us dinner.” She said as she began walking to the house with her hand holding mine.
We walked hand in hand into the home. She promptly sat me down and told me she’d be right back with dinner. I asked her if I could help as she was and older woman and I am still able to do things without it being difficult for me. She told me that I’m doing enough just by carrying the child. I thanked her for her kindness and watched her walk into the kitchen. A few moments later she returned with our food of rice, seaweed soup, and stewed chicken. We have thanks and began eating our food. I began to feel slightly ill, but I dismissed that because being pregnant has been throwing me off lately.
“Lady Y/N, you look pale I think it’s best that you go get some rest.” Mrs. Misaki suggested in a motherly tone.
“As good as this food is, I think you’re right.” I sighed
“Let me help you up dear. And don’t worry about the food, I can heat it up for you later.” She spoke with a smile.
She then got up and helped me out of my chair. I felt lightheaded and the room was spinning slightly. And my knees buckled and I fell into her arms shaking slightly.
“Oh dear!” Mrs. Misaki said sadly as she looked down at my legs.
“What is it?” I questioned nervously
“We need to get you into the tub right now my Lady, it’s urgent.” She said pulling me towards the bathroom.
“Why what’s going on?” I said while looking into her eyes.
“My Lady, you are bleeding heavily and you need to get in the tub.” She persisted and we made our way into the bathroom.
She then undressed me and sat me in our tub. I then saw the blood pooling at my feet. My heat was racing and I felt the sweat beginning to kiss my face. My vision began to blur. Mrs. Misaki was trying to talk to me but I couldn’t make out what she was saying. I felt myself slipping out of consciousness with the only thought in my mind…my baby.
The Next Morning
“Y/n…Y/n…Y/N..” I hear a voice next to me say.
I open my eyes to be greeted by my wives all sitting next to the bed. The all looked just as beautiful as always except their normals cheerful faces held a pained look on them. This caused me to worry. Did our husband get hurt? Did the mission go south? All my thoughts were interrupted when my husband came in the room along with Mrs. Misaki.
“Lord Tengen is everything okay?” I questioned as my words came out weakly.
“I’m so sorry love. I just need you to know that this isn’t your fault and from what Mrs. Misaki says this just happens. I’m just so sorry that it happened to you.” He spoke to me. He then leaned forward and kissed my head with such tenderness that my eyes began to tear up. I was still confused on what what going on. My mind still a blur from the night before.
“What’s going on. Can someone please tell me? Is the baby okay.” I questioned looking at my family.
“Y/N I’m so sorry, love. But you had a miscarriage. The baby is gone.” Hina said wrapping her arms around me.
“What!” I examined. My mind spinning.
“Lady Y/N, please you need to calm yourself.” Mrs. Misaki pleated.
“How could this have happened? What did I do wrong?” I exclaimed frantically looking for answers.
“Love it wasn’t your fault. Please you need to understand that.” Suma said tears pouring out of her face.
“Exactly, it’s going to be okay. We are all here for you.” Makio reassured.
“I killed my baby.” I whispered
“No sweetheart you didn’t.” Tengen spoke shedding a tear. His hand made its way to my face stroking it gently.
“Yes I did!” I exclaimed smacking his hand away.
“Y/N please this isn’t your fault.” He urgently said.
“Please go away all of you.” I said as I turned away from them and buried my face into the bed. My tears were flowing hard and I chocked a sob. My heart ached knowing that my baby wasn’t alive anymore.
One Month Later
My baby was gone and I’m no longer a mother. Everyone has told me that it wasn’t my fault and that I didn’t kill the baby, but I can’t help but feel like I did. I hated myself for it. I don’t eat anymore and I can’t sleep as much. My hair is less full as before and I think I’ve lost a lot of weight. Everyday feels the same since we all buried the baby, which is also the last time I left the house. Their grave is next to my husbands siblings at the Uzui family shrine. I haven’t gone to visit my baby’s grave. I’m too ashamed to show myself there. Mrs. Misaki has been working overtime making sure I’m okay and eating. My lovers have been too, but all I want to be is alone. I don’t wish to see anyone, especially my husband. I’m the reason he won’t have a child to hold soon. I know the others can get pregnant, but it’s dangerous with their line of work right now. I came from a merchant family and one day Uzui and I met and soon I found myself married to him and his beautiful wives.
The pit of guilt in my stomach grew. They took me in and kept me safe and took care of me. And I couldn’t even keep a baby alive. My eyes were so puffy and tired from all the crying I’ve done that I burns to cry now. Turning over, I curled up in a ball placing a hand over my empty stomach longing for my baby.
“Love?” I hear the sweet voice of my wife Hina.
“I brought you some food. Please eat something you need to regain back your strength.” She said placing the tray of food on the bedside table. She then placed her hand in my hair stroking it affectionately.
“Not hungry.” I grumbled
“Okay, well I’ll leave it right here for when you are. It’s just some rice and vegetables.” She spoke
“Thank you.” I responded feeling bad for not speaking that much with her.
“It’s okay, Y/N. I just need you to know that I love you so much. I loved the baby too, we all did. I’m just so sorry that you had to go through that. I’m here for you whenever you need. I’ll let you get some rest. Please eat something.” She spoke sincerely as she got up to leave.
“I love you too Hina.” I whispered hoping she’d hear it.
Two Months Later
I’ve begun to heal more after losing my baby. I’ve gained a little bit more weight due to my wives and Mrs. Misaki’s pestering. I still feel like it’s my fault, but that thought is no longer an all consuming one. I still long for my baby. I never knew their gender or held them. I never even gave them a name. I guess you can say I miss someone I’ve never even met. I decided to go out and enjoy the morning. I glanced around my room to see my lovers sleeping next to me on their beds. Quietly, I got up and walked outside. It was still too early for Mrs.Misaki to come to our home, so I was essentially alone until my lovers woke up.
I breathed in the fresh dewy morning air. Letting rising sun kiss my face and the chilly air nip at my skin. Shedding a few tears down my face, I thought about my baby. Still wishing they were alive. I took a deep breath and looked up at the sky smiling. I wondered if my child was there being taken care of. I then heard footsteps and I looked to see who they belonged to. To my surprise it was my husband in all his flashy persona. Normally on days like this, he would be sleeping still. So I was very glad to see him here.
“Good morning, Lord Tengen.” I greeted him with my morning voice.
“Good morning, love.” He smiled as he sat behind me. His legs draping down the steps as his big arms wrapped around me. His chin then rested on my shoulder as he kissed my cheek.
“I’m sorry.” I whispered
“You have nothing to be sorry for. What happened wasn’t your fault.” He reassured
“I feel like it was.” I said
“It wasn’t anyones fault. It just happened and I certainly don’t blame you. If anyone is sorry it should be me.” He stated
“Why?” I questioned confusion lacing my tone.
“I wasn’t there for you when you really needed me. I should’ve been there for you when you were going through that. I’m just glad the old lady was there.” My husband stated sadly
“You were saving people, my love. This was not your fault. You couldn’t have known.” I said trying around to look him in the eyes. They were glossy and filled with the same sadness that I’ve been plagued with for months.
“You couldn’t have known either. So how was it your fault?” He questioned as he held my face with such tenderness.
“I tripped and that’s what killed them.” I stayed pushing my head into his chest.
“My mother has told me that she fell down many times and even fought off a demon once when she was pregnant with me.” He stated with a chuckle while his right hand lifted my face so I could look once more into his eyes.
“So you did not kill our baby.” He said kissing me softly. After we broke from our kiss, I hugged him sobbing into his chest. He then cried too it wasn’t as loud as mine, but I knew he heart broke too.
“Why don’t we go visit our baby. Just the two of us?” He suggested chocking back a sob.
“Yeah, let’s go.” I whispered
After a while we made it to our baby’s grave. I had a bunch of fresh flowers that we had picked on our way to the cemetery. The day was truly beautiful and calm. As we stood by our baby’s grave hand in hand, I said a silent prayer for them. I then let go of his hand and knelt down touching the headstone. I kissed it and placed the flowers in front of it. I felt Tengens hand rub circles on my back.
“I loved our baby Y/N” He said
“As did I.” I responded
“You would’ve been the best mother. I’m very sure if that.” He said kneeling down with me.
“I guess we’ll never know.” I said sadly.
“This might be too soon for me to say, but if you wanted to try again I think it would be okay. But we would only try again on your terms. And If you never wanted to, I understand that too.” He spoke tucking a lose strand of hair behind my ear.
“One day maybe, I’m just not ready for that. And what if I lose the next one?” I questioned
“If that happens again I promise I will be there for you. I never what you going through that and I’m not there to help you.” He said with determination in his tone.
“Thank you.” I said as I couldn’t think of what to say at that moment.
“I love you. And I’m always going to protect you Y/N. You’re precious to me and I just want you to know that everything will shine brighter one day.” My husband spoke picking me up and cradling me into his lap.
“I love you too.” I spoke nuzzling my face into his neck.
My eyes felt heavy being so close to him. He was always for comforting. Closing my eyes, I thought of our child walking towards all of us. We all have bright smiles on our faces and Suma has tears in her eyes watching the walking for the first time. Smiling at that thought I fell asleep in my husbands arms getting some much needed sleep.
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poppadom0912 · 7 months
Text
Together (VII)
Warnings: Mentions of violence, blood, injuries, abuse, kidnappings, shootings, swearing and scary men.
Summary: When Jay least expected it, he suddenly starts hearing things. And maybe, he's starting to hallucinate too.
A/N: Am I suddenly full of inspiration and writing in school when i should be doing my lab write up? Yes I am. This chapter has been changed many times but I finally finished editing. A little spoiler- maybe I’m being nicer to my babies 🙃
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Over the course of eating their very poorly put together ‘meal’, Will came to the conclusion that the food hadn’t been tampered with and so he was happy to continue feeding you.   
You had to admit that you felt like a baby, your older adult brother feeding adult you. You tried insisting you could feed yourself but with the state of your shaking fingers, hands sore from the countless times they’d been tied back, Will denied you your request.
The man that had given the tray of food returned and this time, there was something rectangle like sticking out in one of his trouser pockets while what clearly sounded like keys was sticking out in the other.   
Your heart skipped a beat, and you could feel Will’s heart rate increase from where his hand was positioned over yours. He must’ve noticed it too.   
The Ezra's were so meticulous in their plans and their behaviour was always erratic and on another level of violence that it was impossible to believe one of their henchmen could even, for a second, have the thought of being nice to their victims.   
But you were continuously surprised by them because as he took the empty tray, leaving behind the two waters and single juice, he ‘accidentally’ dropped the plastic rectangle and as he was walking away, his back turned to you both, a key fell and clanged against the ground, but he never looked back.   
And just like that, the door slammed behind him, massively contrasting the immense kindness he showed mere seconds ago.   
Holy friggin shit balls.  
*****  
Was Trudy worried? Yes, indeed she is. Was she going to show any concern? No, not unless she was left alone with her detective.   
Ever since dispatch had forwarded her Jay’s call, she’d been on her feet and alert. And ever since she found out that Jackson and Ezra Murray were the culprits to blame, she was determined that they weren’t going to get away again.
Trudy knew all the Halstead siblings, but she knew Jay the best. Over the many years, not only herself but many, many others were forced to get used to not one but three Halstead's being in existence and working within less than fifteen minutes from each other.   
Currently, Trudy and Jay were alone in the bullpen since the younger detective was barred from any field work unless they found Will and Y/N’s location but that was the only exception. Right now, her job was to keep Jay company, keep an eye on him and continue looking for any more clues or evidence that could be of any help.   
Jay was very clearly still losing his mind and his mental and physical state deteriorated as time passed. At this point, Trudy couldn’t help but think the worst and fear for how her detective was going to fare as a result.
Currently, she was sat opposite him at Hailey's desk, doing her own bit by going through security footage that had too many hours of video on it. Usually, she would get bored doing this, but it was a little different this time because whenever she glanced up, she was faced with the struggling sight of your brother who never asked for too much.   
All he wanted was to get his older brother and younger sister back.   
Suddenly, the phone on Jay’s desk was ringing. Luckily for him, he had a second phone whenever he went undercover and since the first one had been taken and was likely smashed in an evidence bag somewhere, this was all he was relying on.  
The sound was slightly jarring as it interrupted the pin drop silence they’d been in but neither of them showed any sign of discomfort. Instead, Jay went to answer the call, but his solemn mood didn’t change. It was evident that he wasn’t expecting much since it was his undercover phone that they’d been using two days ago on a case.  
Just as the desk sergeant was about to go back to her CCTV footage, she felt the entire bullpen still. The tension so thick it was suffocating her veins restricting any blood flow, and as she looked up, it became dizzying.   
His already pale face had nothing on Snow White and from where she sat, she could his heartbeat thundering out his chest, practically vibrating. All this could only mean one thing.   
“Will?”
What the fuck
For a hot second, Trudy thought that Jay was in so much pain that he was transferring some of his hallucinations onto her to alleviate his symptoms but then he continued talking into the phone and reality sunk into her bones. 
"Shit, Will wait slow down I can't- what?!"
Without prior warning, Jay shot out of his seat, wavering slightly on his feet causing the older woman to follow and stand by his side in any case he fell from the whiplash she's sure he gave himself. 
"Knives- you've got keys?- Y/N's not unconscious- she's lost her voice- your bleeding?! When- Why are you talking about grape juice?!" Jay paused several times, his words repeatedly getting cut off by Will on the other side of the phone. The longer the call went on, the more confused Trudy became. Jay must've been thinking the same as her from the height his brows rose every time he spoke. They went from talking about knives and blood to grape juice. 
The duality of the Halstead brothers. 
"Wait so he gave you a knife and somehow you found a gun just casually lying around? Will, I swear to God if you-"
And when Jay screw his eyes shut, something in her mind told her the doctor was doing something stupid and very questionable, very in character even when in a life or death situation. It was nice to know people would never change. 
Despite the anxiety growing in her chest, the call lasted longer than she expected. Will was being very efficient and careful for managing whatever he was doing and that put her at somewhat ease. Eventually, nothing physically tore them apart but it was poor internet or a lack of a connection that abruptly ended the call. 
"Tell me you got a location?" Jay asked, hope drowning out any other emotion in his ever so expressive eyes. If it wasn't for lives being on the line then she would've scoffed and scolded him but a sarcastic remark would do for now. 
"What do you take me for?" She asked incredulously as she glanced at the computer screen, almost immediately committing the address to her memory. 
"I'll call Voight but get in the car first."
But Jay didn't need her permission, he was already moving. 
*****
So much had unravelled in the last twenty minutes, you were still struggling to understand it all.
With all the uncertainty and determination in the world, you and Will had no other plan but to take they keys and the pocketknife and basically run as fast as you could. Well, run as much as Will could since he was carrying you on his back, very reminiscent of your childhood while he navigated the halls as best he could. You made a very pathetic argument that you could walk on your own but when you tried standing up, your legs gave in on themselves and Will gave you his motherly disappointed look that was very spot on; you and Jay had been on the receiving end of this look for way too long now that you should’ve been immune to it but here you were.
Opening the basement door, you both cringed at the loud sound it made. You guys hadn’t even left the basement yet and it was already going off to a great start.
As gently as he could, Will readjusted your position on his back, his arms moving to hold under your thighs more securely so that in a rush, you wouldn’t move. As he did so, you kept your arms around his neck, barely gripping him due to both a lack of strength and cautious to not strangle him.
Before leaving the room, you and Will sat and contemplated very long and hard about your escape plan. You were provided with very little by the mysterious man you were now deeming your saviour and maybe guardian angel depending on how successful the escape was.
Staring at the burner phone, you swore. You couldn’t remember anyone’s phone number for the life of you. Easily, you could’ve called 999 but the response much longer than calling someone either of you knew. It shocked you only a little when you couldn’t recollect a single person’s phone number, not even Kelly’s or Jay’s.
But like always, Will was there and knew exactly what to do. Maybe it was his doctor nature, but he had several numbers memorised and for some odd reason, he remembered Jay’s undercover phone number. You called him stupid, but he only laughed it off while he punched in the numbers.
You waited in anticipation, your nerves imitating Will’s as he held the phone to his ear, biting on the inside of his cheek as he waited for the phone to stop ringing. And when it did, Will audibly let out a sigh of relief, you felt like crying.
Will explained in half detail, leaving out a lot. It was obvious that Will was trying to relay the necessary details Jay needed to know about their current situation but then he decided to add in the random unnecessary fact that you drank grape juice. That totally threw you off, but Will kept talking as if nothing were wrong.
When Will eventually finished talking, he went silent and listened to what Jay was saying. For a minute, you couldn’t hear a voice on the other side of the phone but then you heard his muffled voice, and it brought you immediate ease knowing he was safe.
And before you knew it, the call ended, and you were out the dreaded basement.
Back to the present, Will was carefully cruising the empty corridors of the very nicely furnished warehouse. It made you question the desolate and dirty state the basement was in. At one point, you pointed out a gun lying on an ottoman; it was very suspiciously placed but when Will checked, it was very much real and very much loaded.
So here you were: a burner phone, pocketknife, gun, and sheer drive. You didn’t want to jinx it but… yes you weren’t going to jinx it.
The warehouse was ginormous. Every corridor was identical to the next and the furnishing was as though a professional interior designer had been inside. Luckily for you and Will, Jackson and Ezra’s lacky’s hadn’t been plastered all over the place, making your escape just a little more easier.
To remain as incognito as possible, Will only whispered to you when absolutely necessary, narrating to you what he was doing and what was going to happen. So far, so good. Will was slinking around, movements smooth and looking like a hair on his body had never been touched since being here. If you didn’t already know he was a doctor, then you would question his physical abilities and profession.
Each corner you turned, you felt your heart drop, your body anticipating disaster. The more time passed, the more you could feel Will sweat and struggle. He had begrudgingly admitted that he was hurt, going into slight detail that Ezra stabbed him, and he’d been hurt more throughout the several times you were passed out. You knew he was hurt and if you were to go in order of the most hurt to the least, the list would be: You, Will and then Jay. And considering the blood you saw covering Jay’s body the last time you saw him; God knows what went down between your oldest brother and your kidnappers.
“Will, if you’re tired, we can stop for a second.” You whispered into his ear but the only reply you got was him shaking his head. You knew his answer made sense, you needed to get out as soon as possible before you got caught but if Will took just one minute or two to recollect himself then maybe he’d feel better.
However, he decided that he was going to put himself last and everything else first because according to him, apparently you and getting out of this damned place took priority to his light-headedness and the blood that was only now slowly beginning to stop running like a river.
And so, without another word, he readjusted you one more time, his grip tightening around your thighs but not too much so it would hurt, and he continued walking.
Going downstairs was the hardest thing Will had to do by far. Yes, carrying you and maintaining your weight on his back was difficult but he could manage, and you felt much more lighter than what you should’ve been being a firefighter but that was a concern for later.
Staring down from the top of the staircase, Will calculated the descent. Yes, it would hurt a lot considering how much his legs shook as he merely stood but he was now starting to get worried but how little you were moving. Initially, you would move every now and then when your body felt stiff or to whisper under your breath so only he could hear you.
Now though, Will didn’t want to say it, you were deathly silent.
He shoved all his negative thoughts aside, deciding to deal with them later because the biggest problem he had was staring at him mockingly. How did his life come to such a point point that stairs scared him?
Luck must’ve decided to be nice to him all of a sudden because under five minutes, he safely delivered the two of you on the ground floor. Now, all that was left to do was find a back or front door and get the heck out of this place.
But obviously, fate was laughing down on the Halstead’s because luck ran as fast as she could, after only three minutes of doing her job because Will was facing down two familiar looking men decked out in all black.
Series Masterlist:
@mads-weasley @sowrongitslottie @elite4cekalyma @senjoritanana @hufflepuff-blackwidow @mrspeacem1nusone @kmc1989 @goth-cowgirl-03 @daggersquadphantom @photographerkaiya0306 @jamie0515 @samanthavitale @iamasimpingh0e
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rogerswifesblog · 1 year
Text
Help you out
My Masterlist
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A/N: hi! This idea is inspirited by a tiktok I saw about a woman leaking because she saw a baby cry in a movie 🤣🤣 so, yeah… Read the warning!!!! Not your thing? Just skip this one shot:)
Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader
Summary; the avengers have a movie night together and a baby cries on screen. Reader, having given birth a few months ago, is very sensitive to baby cries…her breasts start leaking and Steve comes to help…
Warinings: past pregnancy, mentioned reader having a child, father unknown (mentioned ons), leaking breasts, lactation kink, breast milk, mommy kink, daddy kink, p in v, breeding kink, slight pregnancy kink, multiple creampies, mentioned stretch marks (once)
18+
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You leaned your head against Steve’s shoulders, while watching the movie. It wasn’t really exciting, but you enjoyed being close to Steve. It wasn’t a secret (well, actually it was) that you liked Steve. A lot. Only Natasha knew-she was the one that stood you by when you found out about your pregnancy, when you explained to her that you didn’t remember your daughters fathers name and that it was a drunken one night stand. After that your and Steve’s friendship kind of…you couldn’t explain it. Nothing changed, but everything was so different.
Sighing you closed your eyes, slowly burying your face in the soft material of Steve’s sweater-but then what you’ve feared most happened.
A baby wailing.
You immediately felt your breasts wetting your maternity bra and the shirt you were wearing. Even Steve’s sleeve, since you had been cuddling with him. “Fuck”, you whispered, grabbing you breasts to stop the milk flowing, but it didn’t help much. “I’ll be right back-“, with that you disappeared, quickly walking to the bathroom.
The team watched you go, all slightly confused. All besides Natasha, Wanda and Steve. Both women knew how the body of a mother worked, especially with a crying baby, even if it wasn’t yours. And Steve…Steve smelled it. Felt it. The sweet smell of your milk, the warm feeling when it wetted his sleeve. Fuck. His dick hardened and he had to pull the blanket higher over his crotch.
He really tried not to think about your sweet milk, how your breasts looked when they leaked…
It took him a few minutes till he finally felt his dick calm down and you still weren’t back. Maybe you went feeding your baby? But he didn’t think you’d extra wake your girl up, especially when she finally had fallen asleep. You had said yourself you hoped she’d sleep through most of the night.
“I’ll get her”, he mumbled not to disturb the movie and went to your room. Since he couldn’t find you there and the bathroom door was closed, he guessed you were there. “Are you okay? Can I come in?”, he knocked and opened the door after hearing you let him in.
His gaze fell onto your naked breasts and he felt himself blush immediately. “Oh-I-sorry-I thought you said yes-“ “I did, Steve, it’s fine. You’ve seen me feed her so many times, I don’t care about it anymore-I just-I can’t find my pumps-but ugh, I have so much milk. She didn’t eat a lot today and now I feel so, so full”, you whined, your nipples still leaking occasionally, while you tried to find your pumps which you always had in your cabinet.
Where the fuck did you put them?
You noticed how Steve was still staring at your breasts. They looked so heavy. So full. So…god, he felt his dick stiffen again. That was so embarrassing. Was he being a weirdo? But your breasts looked so good. He wanted to grab them. Maybe bury his face in them…lick your nipples, taste- ““Steve-don’t look at them like that. It’s like you’ve never seen boobs before-” “I haven’t seen leaking boobs”, Steve you idiot. Where was this brain to mouth filter when you needed it. It definitely never worked for Steve. Especially in situations where it would be very much important to think before talking.
Steve’s cheeks turned a darker shade of red and even you felt blood rush to your cheeks. A soft smile escaped your lips. “And now what? You wanna touch them?”, you didn’t expect for Steve to actually lift his hand, but he quickly pulled away, blushing even deeper. “Sorry I-I don’t know what’s wrong with me. It’s like my brain isn’t…yhm…braining”, he mumbled, his eyes still on your tits. It looked like they were leaking even more than before. And when he took a deep breath the sweet smell was there, too. Sometimes he hated his enhanced abilities. Especially in the city, it was always overwhelming but now…fuck, he loved it. He could smell you.
Slowly you turned around, dripping your arms at your sides. Steve licked his lips, looking at your heavy breasts, their size definitely changed since before your pregnancy. From small and perky to more..heavy hanging and also bigger.
“If you want…you can touch, I mean…but…I’m sensitive and…well, leaking”, you mumbled, watching as Steve stepped a bit closer. Your breath hitched when he slowly lifted his hand, so close to touch and yet not close enough. You haven’t been intimate with anyone since…you found out about your pregnancy. Which definitely was a long time. You had a crush on Steve for the past three years, so it made your excitement even more when he finally cupped your breasts gently. It’s not how you imagined his hands on you for the first time, but it didn’t matter. It’s probably the first and also last time that he touches you that way-and you’d enjoy it for as long as it would last.
A quiet gasp escaped your lips when his thumb rubbed over your wet nipple, while he put his other hand under your breast to feel the weight of it in his palm. “Fuck…feels so different from other breasts, can I-“, before he finished the question he squeezed your breast lightly, some of your milk dripping from your nipple. Since you had closed your eyes, you didn’t notice it happening. It just felt so good being touched like this. Having someone lift your heavy breasts. The weight gone, the soreness in your shoulder immediately being reduced.
While you weren’t watching Steve gently let go of one of your breasts, lifting his milk covered hand to his mouth, licking it away. When you heard the licking and quiet slurping, you opened your eyes in surprise.
Steve was licking your milk from his finger away.
When he felt your gaze, his cheeks became scarlet once again. “Didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable..just…curious…M’sorry”, he mumbled behind his palm.
You bit your bottom lip, slowly looking down at your breasts, then back at Steve. “And…is it…like…good?”, you asked quietly, maybe even slightly insecure. Steve nodded immediately, looking at your breasts again, before back to your curious eyes. “Hell yeah, so good-like….like almond? Maybe? It reminds me of almond”, he mumbled, stepping a bit closer, till your nipples touched his shirt.
He grabbed your hips, lifting you on the cabinet next to the sink. A squeak escaped your lips from the quick movements. A grin crept onto his lips. “Let…let me help you. I can tell your breasts are heavy…they hurt, huh? So full…and tender…Let Daddy help you”, he whispered into your ear, licking over your lips (and risking your friendship at this moment.) He actually surprised himself, but now he couldn’t take it back anymore.
“Steve-yes, fuck, yes, yes, yes”, you whispered, pressing yourself against him, wrapping your arms and legs around him. The blond looked at you for a moment, your eyes, then to your lips, before leaning down, pressing his lips to yours. You brushed your hand into his hair, pulling him even closer, deepening the kiss. Feeling his lips against your made your heartbeat quicken, a warmth spreading in your chest.
After a few more long moments you pulled away, needing to breathe again. Steve immediately started kissing your neck, leaving rosy suck marks behind, before kissing down to your breasts. He looked up at you for a moment, making sure you were still okay with it-and fuck, you were so okay with it.
He licked teasingly over your breast, circling your nipple, before closing his lips around it, sucking gently. A moan escaped your lips, while you grabbed Steve’s hair, pushing him even closer, unknowingly rubbing your crotch against his hard bulge. Only then did you notice he was hard as a rock.
Steve rutted against you, the taste of your milk filling his mouth and making him feral. It tasted better than he imagined. He couldn’t stop himself from sucking harder, pulling at your nipple, grabbing your breast and squeezing to get more milk out. His mouth was so full of your milk, he felt it leak from the corners of his mouth. There was so much. Fuck, fuck, fuck.
He grinded his hard dick even harder into your pulsing heat. “Steve-Daddy, fuck me”, you whined into his hair opening his pants with one hand. A moan escaped his lips when you pushed his boxershorts down, wrapping your fingers around his shaft, stroking him. He let go of your nipple, glancing at you from under his eyelashes. He licked over his lips, licking away the drops that didn’t make it into his mouth. “Is that so, mommy? Want me to fuck you?”, he grinded, kissing you once again, helping you out of your pants and panties, nearly ripping them from your body.
When your gaze fell onto his hard cock you gasped. “Steve-I don’t think you’ll fit. You’d be the first after-after I gave birth and-holy Jesus, I’m pretty sure my stitches are healed but-but you’re-like-really big”, a quiet laugh interrupted your rambling, while Steve started stroking himself. “I’ll be gentle…promise, but do you have a condom?”, he kissed your cheeks gently, his other hand slowly trailing from your breasts down to your core. He bit his bottom lip feeling how drenched you were, slowly entering you with one of his thick fingers.
For a moment you completely forgot his question, but when he repeated it, you slowly shook your head. “It’s-its fine-I’m on the pill”, you mumbled, overwhelmed by the single finger he was pressing into your wet core. It felt so, so good…
When he curled his finger, hitting your sensitive spot, your whole body twitched, your breasts jiggling with the movement. “You’re making me crazy, sweetheart. Let me taste you again, mommy. Wanna drink your milk..tastes so good”, he mumbled, before sucking the neglanced nipple into his mouth, his taste buds being hit with your sweet milk again. “So fucking good”, he m whispered against your skin, the sound of sucking and slurping following.
At this point he had drunk so much of your milk, he really felt it filling his tummy, warm and sweet. He could do this all day.
Another moan escaped your lips when he hit the spot again, his palm grinding against your clit, while he slowly added a second finger, now feeling how tight you were. The stretch made you moan into his hair. “Fuck I’ll-I think I’ll come”, you whispered into his hair and just when you finished the sentence, he stated sucking harder, the pleasure overwhelming you. An intense and sudden orgasm overtook you, making you open your mouth in a silent moan, while you pulled Steve’s even more against your breasts.
“Fuck me-fuck mommy, Steve-fuck me Daddy”, you babbled, while he slowly took out his fingers, to replace them with his hard cock. You quickly grabbed his wrist, pulling his fingers to your lips, and licking your arousal from them. A quiet ‘fuck’ escaped Steve’s lips when he lifted his head to watch you. “Are you sure about the condom?”, he whispered again, because…until now he had never fucked someone without a condom. And the thought alone made his cock twitch and leak against your already wet folds.
You nodded again, wrapping your legs even tighter around his waist, the mushroom head already pushing into your drenched cunt. “I want you to fuck your cum into me, daddy. Fuck me, fuck me please”, you whispered kissing his neck. “I want to feel it leak out of me when we get back to the living room-want to be marked. Come on daddy-“, he could stop himself from thrust a bit into you, making you gasp loudly.
“You’ll be the death of me, mommy. Gonna fuck you so good. Gonna come so many times. Get you all round and full again. You’ll make me a daddy”, he whispered, needing all his self control not to just starting fucking you like an feral animal, pounding your thighs cunt till he’d come in you at least four times. Having your stomach bulging with his cum.
You moaned when his dick rubbed along your soft spot perfectly. “Steve-yes-get me all round and stuffed full”, you gasped. Steve could already imagine seeing your tummy big and round again. This time with his child.
“Gonna fuck you so good, mommy”, with that he bottomed out, giving you a bit time to adjust. His fingers circled your clit, till you were a moaning and shaking mess. His lips wrapped once again around your nipple, sucking harsher than before, wanting to get all the sweet nectar out of you.
“Move Steve-Daddy move-and don’t fucking stop till you’ve at least two loads fucked into me”, you moaned. And that’s when you finally broke his self control. He pulled his dick to the top out, pushing hard back into you, repeating it again, again, again and again…
Your moans making him thrust faster, harder, till the whole cabinet started hitting the wall but he didn’t give a shit. He didn’t even care if the team heard it. He was on a fucking mission. (Ha)
He braced himself with one hand against the wall, the other one holding your hips, his thrusts felt now even harder than before. “Oh my-Daddy-I’m-fuck I’m coming”, it surprised you when you squirted all over Steve’s pants and the cabinet underneath you, your cunt tightening around him. Him being still fully dressed, while you were completely naked made you feel…something. You couldn’t explain how you felt.
A loud moan escaped his chest when he started filling your cunt with his seed, without stopping pounding into you. His cum leaking around his dick, but he didn’t care, the squelching sounded louder than before.
You held into his back with one hand, the other one braced against the cabinet, while Steve fucked you. Your soft spot feeling way over stimulated but it felt so good, you couldn’t stop.
Only after two more orgasm from Steve and another one from you, he started slowing down, only grinding his hips into you. “Now let me suck those tits again”, he grinned against your neck, before doing as told. Your breathing was heavy, uneven, your heartbeat racing. Did this..all really happened? Wow.
After a few more minutes Steve let your nipple out of his mouth with a loud ‘pop’, before also pulling out. You immediately felt empty-feeling the cum that was leaking out of you.
Steve bit his bottom lip, when he looked down at his cum coated dick, before looking back to you. “Can I see?”, he whispered, making you raise your eyebrows. “Wha’ you wanna see?”, you mumbled tiredly.
His cheeks blushed. He fucking blushed.
“I’ve never…you know, without a condom”, he grinned, gently pushing your knees apart. “But Steve I’m not as pretty anymore down there- you know from-“ “yeah I know how you feel about it, but I still think you’re beautiful. You made a life in your stomach and pushed it out-anyone who’d shame you about would be a total asshole”, he whispered, kissing your lips gently. The soft taste of your milk still on them.
So you slowly lifted your legs a bit more, feeling the blush creeping onto your face. Steve bit his bottom lip, looking at your cum drenched folds, slightly gaping hole and-. “Your stitches are all fine. They are definitely hea-“ “Steve! I would’ve checked myself!”, you scolded him, feeling your face heat up even more, while you swatted his arm. The blond grinned, shrugging and holding your legs up when you wanted to close them. “I’m already looking, so the least I can do is let you know.”
You kicked him for that comment, making him only laugh more.
After he gently helped you from the counter, you felt more cum leak out of your pussy onto your thighs. You didn’t mean to, but you grimaced slightly, looking back at Steve, who had a slightly possessive-maybe even predatory-glimmer in his eyes. “You’re so fucking beautiful”, he whispered, his hand stroking over your stomach, right over your stretch marks.
A blush crept onto your lips and you put your arms around him, your hands sliding underneath his shirt. He kissed your head. “Let’s ditch the movie and take a bath, hm, sweetheart? Afterwards we can lay down and…talk a bit about what happened. I don’t want it to be a one time thing”, he whispered into your hair, pulling you a bit closer into his warm embrace.
BONUS
In the morning you woke up alone in bed, but you could hear Steve’s quiet whisper from the other corner of your bedroom. “Come on little girl, we don’t want to wake your mommy with crying, huh? Give me a little smile-exactly, yeah, now we can go get her”, you opened your eyes, watching as Steve gently swayed your babygirl in his arms, turning to your bed.
When he noticed you were awake, a shy smile crept onto his lips. “I-sorry if you dont want me to do it, it’s just; I woke before you and heard her start sniffing so I thought I could try to keep her from crying. She’s probably hungry”, he said, while sitting next to you, helping you sit up with one hand. Your little babygirl fitting perfectly in his arm.
“Hungry? Let’s hope there’s something left after your appetite”, the comment made Steve blush, now you could see the blush creeping from his chest to his cheeks. After the night your breasts were already heavy-not as much as yesterday, but definitely enough. Your baby’s cries stopped when she latched onto your nipple, sucking greedy.
You didn’t even notice Steve’s fond gaze on the two of you.
Steve kissed your cheeks, before standing up again. “I’ll get us some breakfast-“ “I’ll come with you, just give me a few minutes.”
So he waited till you and your girl were ready and dressed, him also putting on sweatpants and a shirt, before walking to the kitchen, where the team sat.
When you two entered the kitchen, all gazes were on you. Clint and Bruce seemed nearly frightened, pale as ghosts, Natasha, Bucky and Tony were smirking, Wanda avoided your gaze and Thor grinned like always.
“I hope the cabinet is still standing-“ “Tony!”
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Well….👀
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Imagine Prt 5
Was this all a dream?
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“Wake up.”
Her eyes shot open and a blinding light almost burned through her retina like a magnifying glass to an ant. She shut her eyes tightly, opening them again only this time the light had been replaced with a face you’d love to wake up to every single day. 
Only this face was the face of an unhinged, sadistic murderer with deep-seated obsessive-compulsive personality disorder. So, naturally, Y/N wanted to scream. She wanted to kick and scream. But for some reason, her throat felt as if she’d swallowed glass. Her limbs were bound to a flatbed with no support and it was bone-chilling cold.
Her dry tongue tried to bring moisture to her dehydrated lips but there was no use. The feeling began to over power her limbs. Why does it feel like she’d been running on rocks? She couldn’t wiggle her toes. Why is there cushioning lining the walls? Why is everything so stark white? Why does the door remind her of a prison? 
Still trying to gain her motor skills, Y/N tried moving her head from left to right. She allowed her tired eyes to scan her body as best as she could. Thick leather restraints and rusty buckles kept her imprisoned to the bed. She could taste the fear on her tongue and it was far from pleasant. 
“Hello, Y/N,” a smooth baritone filled her ears, “You’ve been out for a while now. Glad to have you back with us.”
She refused to speak. Who are they? 
“You’ve created quite the ruckus this time around. Had I not saved you from what would have been your death, you wouldn’t be here right now.”
She could feel hot tears pricking her eyes. 
“We had to put you out. Heavily sedate you. I usually don’t agree to this, but you somehow got your hands on a knife from the kitchens. Sadly, I couldn’t help you out of this one. Not when you almost killed me…”
The sound of his dress shoes click-clacked across the polished floor. He seemed to pace back and forth. Y/N kept her eyes on the padded wall. She thought she’d escaped his wrath. She wondered if her sister made it out safely. After everything April had gone through, she deserved to live. As for Y/N, she was the dumb bitch who fell in love with a psycho. 
“Y/N? What are you thinking about?” He questioned with a patient voice.
She couldn’t find it in her to speak. 
“One way or another, you’ll have to talk to me. Even if that means you’ll be tied to this bed.”
He approached her side with slow strides and reached out to stroke her hair back from her face. He then used his knuckle to wipe away her tears before quickly moving his hand away when he realized what he was doing. 
“I care so much about your well-being because I have such a soft spot for you, Y/N. I know I shouldn’t say things like that…but I’ve grown fond of you as my patient.” 
Patient?
Y/N turned her head quickly to look at him. To make sure she’d heard him exactly. She somehow missed the hospital band with the number 67 on it and her name. 
“What?” 
Her voice was cracking. 
“What do you mean patient?”
Drinking him in, he’s wearing a white button down shirt, black slacks with a black belt, and polished black dress shoes. Gold-rimmed specs decorated his obsidian eyes and his hair is loc’d with a crisp tapered fade. A navy blue lanyard hung from his sturdy neck and a laminated badge attached to it. She studied the badge very closely. 
Dr. N’Jadaka Stevens
Dr. N’Jadaka Stevens
Dr. N’Jadaka Stevens
She couldn’t believe it. This can’t be true. A Doctor?
He had a pleasant smile in the picture on the badge. It’s slightly faded and his hair was styled in a kinky fro. 
“We’ve been through this many times before, Y/N,” He took a seat at the foot of the bed, “yes, you are a patient here at Gateway. You’ve been a patient here for over a year now.”
“Wha—no–this–no–no I–I’m not a patient.”
“Hm,” His eyes became sorrowful, “this is the deepest delusion episode you’ve had since being admitted.”
“Delusion?” Y/N squinted her eyes with confusion, “Are you trying to say I’m crazy?”
“No, no,” Erik shakes his head, “You suffer from delusional disorder. It’s what you’ve been diagnosed with.”
“I’m delusional?! Me?! After the way you’ve acted?!”
Erik adjusted his glasses as he stared at Y/N with no emotion. 
“What is this? Another sick game of yours?! Where the fuck am I?!”
A hard knock to the door caused Y/N to jump. 
“Everything is good,” He shouted towards the door. 
A burly man turned his back away from the small panel of glass in the door. 
“What is this place, Erik?” 
“Gateway.”
“This where you keep all of your victims before you murder them?!” Y/N snapped.
He smirked, “No, Y/N, I’m not the psychopath you think I am. Maybe that’s how you see it in your altered reality, but I’m just your psychiatrist.”
Y/N laughed maniacally. 
“Okay! You’ve won! Now let me go!!!”
He stood from the bed. Y/N began to kick and writhe. The bed was mounted to the floor with bolts specifically for this reason. She started becoming light headed from her dehydration and the urge to vomit overcame her. 
“I FUCKING HATE YOU!” She screamed.
“You hate the fantasy you’ve created in your mind. To you, I’m Erik, The one that held you captive, kidnapped your sister, murdered her boyfriend, murdered your ex—”
“YOU DID ALL OF THOSE THINGS! So what is this?! Are you really some twisted doctor?! What are you going to do now, torture me until I beg you to kill me?!!!”
He turned his back on her. He removed his glasses and placed them in his shirt pocket. He couldn’t keep up with the amount of times this has happened. It always ends in this very room. 
“But, would you even do it? Would you do it when I’m pregnant with your baby, Erik? If you kill me, you kill the one link to you. All of those lies about how you would never hurt me,” Y/N broke down crying between sentences, “You lied to me. You don’t love me, you don’t love anyone or anything. You’re not capable of love. All you know is death and heartbreak. You’re fucking crazy. You’re the one that should be tied to this bed, not me. I wish I never fucking met you.”
N’Jadaka shut his eyes slowly. Y/N’s words stung. He knew that she wasn’t well, but why did her made up world hurt his feelings so much? No one can see or know how that made him feel. He’d lose his job and never see her again. 
“Y/N, I’m going to show you something,” He finally turned to look at her, his face expressionless, “This is your file. Your patient file. Everything within this manila folder is between you and I. It’s worn out  because I’ve shown you this file many times before. This is the only solution to your episodes. Showing you proof that THIS is the reality you are in…”
N’Jadaka took long strides towards Y/N. Her chest heaved up and down rapidly as if she were chasing her own breath. He opened the file and held it above her head so that she could read it. The first page was her information, including her diagnosis. Delusion Disorder. She squinted to focus and when the words seemed to connect, her eyes scanned the page. Her brows creased with worry and her lower lip trembled. 
N’Jadaka flipped the page. Now, she was seeing her criminal profile. It was a crime of insanity. Not guilty by reason of insanity. Remaining confined to Gateway. A double homicide. Y/N’s eyelids fluttered and a fresh swell of tears rolled into her hairline. N’Jadaka couldn’t bear the look on her face each and every time. 
“April…Darrell…no…no…I wouldn’t have…”
“I’m sorry, Y/N…”
“This—you made this up. You typed this up to make me look crazy—”
“You murdered your sister and your fiancé in cold blood. You can’t remember any of it because you were having an episode. You blacked out and woke up in handcuffs. This happened almost two years ago, Y/N.”
“No…”
“You’ve been admitted to Gateway Mental Hospital as an inmate and you were assigned to be my patient.”
“This…what is…no…”
She could feel the blood rushing to her head. Her eyes darted back and forth. Visions of blood and the sound of pleads and cries pierced her ears. 
Slash!
Slash!
Slash!
Y/N no! Please, please, I’m so sorry! 
Y/N!!!! Don’t do this!!!
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!
Slash!
Slash!
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!
Splatter splatter splatter
I—I’ll always love you…
_________________________
“Time to wake up.” 
Y/N could hear a voice…a sonorous voice. She stood up on wobbling legs and covered her ears. Y/N stumbled and hit the padded white wall behind her. Only one light soaring high above her illuminated the room. She turned to press her face into the soft yet firm wall to hide her eyes. She felt like a vampire. 
She woke up from a dream. She was caressing her pregnant belly while sitting on the beach in the sand. She was alone and there was a sunset. She couldn’t see the man that had her sitting between his legs with her head resting against his chest, but she could see his bloody hands with deep slashes palming her belly. 
Both hands were covered in tattoos. It looked like a scripture with faded ink. Squeezing her eyes tightly, a sharp pain in her temple had her keeled over in pain. She was having a migraine. Y/N was exposed from behind, the curve of her nude cheeks and the smooth dip in her spine on display for whoever could see. 
“Y/N, this is Dr. Stevens. I’m at the door. Please, don’t fight today.”
A loud buzzer sounded off and she leaped away from the padded wall. Dark circles beneath her eyes, Y/N studied the heavy door. It opened and in walked Dr. Stevens with a tray of food. Behind him were two men wearing all white from head to toe. They had disgusted looks on their faces. Maybe that was a disguise, because Y/N could see past the pure hate in their eyes and sense desire. She wanted to rip their eyes out and feed it to them. 
There is a table next to her bed mounted to the floor and Dr. Stevens placed the tray of food there. Y/N cut her eyes to the tray to see what it was. Her stomach rumbled then.
“Turkey and cheese. Apple juice. And a fruit cup.”
Y/N slowly looked up at Dr. Stevens. He was dressed in another white button down shirt again but this time he wore khakis that hugged his tight ass and strapping thighs. Brown loafers on his feet and a gold Rolex completed the look. His gold-rimmed specs were in his shirt pocket again. 
“You haven’t eaten in 24 hours,” N’Jadaka turned to the men, “Go ahead, unchain her.”
The two guards gave each other a look before they both approached her. One man yanked the long chain connected to the cuffs on her wrists while the other crouched down to take the ankle cuff off. Y/N looked down at him with a burning desire to knee him in the face. He could feel her staring, so he looked up and glared at her. 
“Whatchu lookin at, girl?” 
His face was red with anger. 
“Stop looking up my gown.” Y/N warned him.
He chuckled darkly, “you wish I was looking up your gown you crazy bitch—”
“Watch your mouth,” N’Jadaka shoved the guard, “Time to go.” 
The guard got into N’Jadaka’s face. N’Jadaka stared at him with amusement with his hands folded in front of him and his feet wide. 
“You gon’ hit me? Do it. I can have your ass fired in a heartbeat. I know how much of a dirty mother fucker you are. Did you think I forgot?”
The guard's face turned purple.
“Now, I suggest you get out of here. And don’t let me find out you’ve been harassing the female patients again.” N’Jadaka said.
He twisted his lips and clenched his fists but instead of making matters worse for himself, he stormed off leaving the other guard behind. They shut the door with a slam and N’Jadaka looked to the ceiling to calm himself. Every day he has to remind himself that he is a professional and this isn’t the time or place to get into an altercation. He’d already been warned many times in the past and it almost cost his license. 
“Sorry about that,” N’Jadaka exhaled slowly, “I can get a little…why don’t you sit down and eat, Y/N?”
She watched N’Jadaka sit on the bed. 
“Come on, sit.”
Y/N finally took a seat in front of the table. She pulled the tray closer to her with her finger tips. Picking up the sandwich, she slowly took a bite and began mashing it with her teeth. She could feel her teeth chattering as if she were cold. Her leg bounced with nerves and she could feel tears cascading down her cheeks.
“Good?” N’Jadaka questioned.
Y/N simply nodded her head.
“Is today better than yesterday?”
Y/N wiped her cheeks with the back of her hands. She swallowed her food down before speaking.
“What happened to my baby?”
N’Jadaka paused. He leaned forward onto his knees with his elbows before locking eyes with her again.
“…you’re baby never made it, Y/N. You had a miscarriage.”
Y/N touched her belly gently. Her fingers gripped the gown tightly. Now she was bent over wailing into her food. Her tears soaked the bread of her lunch meat sandwich. N’Jadaka watched her cry, his fingers itching to comfort her. Pull her into an embrace. But, he knew he was being watched. The only place he couldn’t be watched was his own office. But Y/N didn’t have outside privileges for another month. 
“I—I just don’t understand any of this shit,” Y/N sniffled, “Why would I kill them? I loved my sister. I—”
“The knowledge of the affair broke you. What you didn’t know, and what your mother failed to tell you, was that your father suffered from the same thing. He had obsessive-compulsive personality disorder and he suffered from delusions. It got so bad that he jumped out of a window to his death. When you started showing signs of the same thing, your mother kept it from you. She felt ashamed to get you the help you needed.”
Y/N couldn’t tell her reality from fantasy anymore. She felt like she was living a lie. 
“April and Darrell didn’t deserve what happened to them, but that doesn’t make you a bad person, Y/N. You’re just ill. I’m here to help you work through that. You’re one of the most difficult patients I’ve ever had but that’s what I love about my job. I will never give up. I’ll find a solution.”
Y/N fidgets with the hem of her gown. The hard metal chair beneath her naked butt made her feel numb. She badly wanted to see her sister. Not bloodied and slaughtered, but smiling and full of life. Memories of Darell made her aware of her delusions at times. She hadn’t met Erik at a poetry reading, it was Darrell. The home on the beach belonged to him as well but there was no glass chamber, sound proof walls, and cuffs to the bed. So why had she replaced Darrell with Dr. Stevens?
“I am a bad person. I killed my sister and my fiancé because I found out they’d been fucking. Cut off the engagement, sure, disown my sister, sure, but murder them in cold blood like I did?”
Y/N pressed the palms of her hands into her eyes to stop herself from crying.
“These cuts on my hands…are from the knife…I used to kill them…”
“Y/N. Breathe. Remember the exercise I taught you. Breathe in and hold for five seconds then release.” 
Y/N did the exercise a few times. 
“It  must feel very frightening to have these nightmares. To have these delusions.” N’Jadaka said.
“…why do I keep seeing you in my delusions as the monster when I’m the monster?”
N’Jadaka stands to pace back and forth in front of her. This was something he did often.
“…Sometimes a person with delusions will treat others as though they are someone else. It’s a reaction to the delusions. It’s a type of delusion called persecutory delusion. It’s when you have a belief of harassment or persecution. It also plays into your OCP.”
Y/N clung onto every word.
“…you’ve somehow decided to see me as the villain because I represent your current life. Your life is confined to these walls,” N’Jadaka placed his hands in his pockets, “you see my face everyday. You speak to me everyday. It shows that you are trying to fight your way through your recent struggles, but also you’re…”
N’Jadaka halted his footsteps. He stopped speaking mid sentence and blinked his eyes rapidly, as if he were remembering where he was. 
“I’m what?” Y/N questioned. 
N’Jadaka looked over his shoulder at the door and then he glanced over at Y/N. He struggled with what he wanted to say, but ultimately, he decided to keep it to himself. For now.
“I think we can end this session for today. I’m going to discuss with the hire-ups about resuming your personal sessions. I feel that with many eyes on us, no matter if they can’t hear, it doesn’t make this personal. Private. Do you understand?”
Y/N stared at N’Jadaka with a bewildered expression. 
“I’m sorry,” N’Jadaka glanced down at his watch, “I have to go for now, it was nice talking to you today.” 
He walked away and knocked on the door. The loud buzzer sounded off again and the door opened. Dr. Stevens left without a backwards glance and the door shut behind him, leaving Y/N alone to her thoughts.
______________________
Curls tangled, nails cut short, and skin dry.
Y/N was in the showers for the first time in a long time. She’s now back in her old room that had normal walls, a softer bed, and better lighting. She has all of the things she enjoyed from puzzles, books, and stress balls to warm sheets. She returned to the circle room that reminded her of a large sunroom where she could do a myriad of activities and even play games with the other patients. All supervised of course. The soft carpet with colorful shapes would feel so good compared to the hard floors in her room and those cozy socks with the sticky bottom would keep her warm and cozy on colder nights.
She was able to comb her hair out, pull it into a messy bun, and she was able to apply lotion to her body. All supervised. Despite looking like the undead with dark circles under her eyes, Y/N felt better. She wondered if they would ever get tired of putting her away for a month in the padded room. She can’t control her delusions. They know this. Y/N walked into the circle room accompanied by two guards and found an empty table near a window. She said hello to some of the patients that she recognized and found herself a puzzle to complete.
Now that she was living her reality, she felt so alone. No family, no friends, no fiancé, no baby. She was going to die alone and crazy. She mustered the little strength left within her to fight back tears. The only person who understood her was Dr. Stevens and she hadn’t seen him in three days. He’s always patient and understanding with her, even when she’s accusing him of being a psycho. Y/N wouldn’t admit it to him, but there was a part of her that couldn’t stop reliving the delusions because she enjoyed the way he made her feel. 
He was attentive, affectionate, and assertive. The sex was amazing. While she sorted through her puzzle pieces, the thought of sex with Dr. Stevens had Y/N squirming in her seat. He would never think of her that way. A murderer who’s crazy? Nah. He probably has a loving family of his own. Probably leaves this hospital every night to go home to a home cooked meal, a hot shower, and wet pussy. He probably kisses his children good night and tucks them in like the good daddy he is. 
The way he defended her and the glint in his eye and the rasp of his voice turned her on something vicious. She’d have thrown herself at him if it wasn’t for her current predicament. She desperately wanted to know what he’d wanted to say to her. Where is he?
Y/N looked up to see the nurses entering. They were bringing around snacks and their second round of meds. Y/N rolled her brown eyes and returned to her puzzle. One of the nurses finally came around and Y/N never put up a fight. She accepted her lorna doone cookies and orange juice. She took her antipsychotics in front of the nurse and washed it down with a small cup of water. She would have to speak to Dr. Stevens about them upping her dosage.
Thirty minutes into her puzzle and loud thunder brought her attention to the window. All the other patients seemed to gravitate towards the windows as well. Y/N closed her eyes and imagined herself dancing in the rain. Gown soaked, the smell in the air, the breeze blowing her curls into her face.
“I enjoy a rainy day myself.”
Y/N turned to see Dr. Stevens. He’s wearing a black long sleeve fitted sweater and dark blue jeans with black dress boots. His badge is clipped to his hip this time and he replaced his gold-rimmed specs with Calvin Klein frames. It must be a casual Friday for the doctors today. 
“Where have you been?” Y/N asked. 
“I took some time off. Another puzzle?”
N’Jadaka made himself comfortable in the seat across from her. He picked up the box to see what the picture looked like since Y/N wasn’t finished. 
“The Disney castle. Cinderella’s castle?”
“Yes…you took time off to do what?”
Dr.Stevens placed the box back down and cut his eyes to Y/N. She clenched her thighs shut.
“To see other patients. You’re not the only patient I treat, Y/N.”
Y/N tilted her head at him.
“Penny for your thoughts?” 
Y/N leaned into the table with her elbows, making herself closer to Dr. Stevens.
“I thought that I was the most difficult patient you’ve ever had?”
N’Jadaka picked up a puzzle piece, “yes. But I have to put in time with other patients as well.”
“I don’t like it,” Y/N cleared the table and placed the puzzle box at the end of the table, “what if I have another episode? I almost killed you, remember?”
“Breathe,” Dr. Stevens spoke with a hushed tone, “After dinner you will resume sessions with me in my office. Don’t worry, we can talk for an entire two hours about anything.”
“…and you’ll tell me what you wanted to say the last time but couldn’t?”
N’Jadaka lowered his gaze to his hands and his mouth twitched slightly. 
“Breathe,” Y/N smirked.
“I have to go. Finish your puzzle. It keeps you focused.”
N’Jadaka rose from his seat and took one final look at Y/N before walking away and out of the circle room. 
__________________________
Y/N adjusted the oversized heather gray pullover she had on that matched the sweatpants covering her lower half. The guard that had the chain to her cuffs stopped in front of Dr. Stevens’ office door. He knocked twice and she became jittery. The guard, Anthony is his name, looked down at her with annoyance. Y/N couldn’t recall the last session she had with him in his office, but she were nervous. No cameras. Just him and her.
“Thank you.” 
Released, Y/N walks into the office and Dr. Stevens shuts the door behind her. Everything about Dr. Stevens' office screamed welcoming. The soothing colors surrounding her promoted a sense of calm and relaxation. The artwork on the walls told Y/N a little something about him. Art of the African diaspora. As her eyes scanned the walls, she came across the tribal mask she’d seen many times in her delusions. The mask Erik had worn the night he gunned down the kind man behind the club. 
Plants decorated window sills, comfortable seating whether on the floor or a chair, and nothing distracting and triggering crowded the space. It smelled clean, and it felt like home. Y/N took a seat on a tufted dark gray chaise and propped her legs up. 
“Welcome back, Y/N.”
“Feels good to be back,” Y/N pulled on the sleeves of her sweater anxiously.
“How was your day?” N’Jadaka asked.
“Better than I thought. I didn’t have a nightmare last night.”
“Oh? That’s good to hear, Y/N. I’m proud of you.”
“Ha,” Y/N shook her head bashfully, “don’t say things like that.”
“That I’m proud of you?” N’Jadaka questioned.
“What is there to be proud of?”
“You’re improving.”
“I don’t think so.”
“Why’s that?”
“Why’s that?” Y/N echoed, “Well, I’m still having episodes.”
“Fewer episodes. You’re getting better.” N’Jadaka clarified.
“I’ll feel better when it stops.”
N’Jadaka crossed his arms over his chest.
“You keep having these delusions so frequently because something is triggering it.” 
Y/N creases her brows. 
“Elaborate.”
“Let’s see,” N’Jadaka rolled up his sleeves and took a seat in front of Y/N on an ottoman, “You have these delusions because you still haven’t forgiven yourself for what happened. You want to blame everyone else around you instead of accepting what happened as truth. That’s one part of it. Another part is…your desire for me.”
Y/N leisurely looked up at N’Jadaka. They stayed that way for a moment, just staring at each other, never turning away. Y/N’s eyes welled with tears and she took her sweater to wipe her eyes.
“Is it that obvious?” She said between sniffing, “Am I really that messed up?”
“I never implied that,” N’Jadaka smoothed his hands down his face, “Desiring me doesn’t make you messed up.”
“Why do you give a fuck?” Y/N sassed.
“I’m supposed to—I’m your doctor—”
“N’Jadaka,” Y/N spoke softly, “Tell me how to get over you.”
N’Jadaka nibbled on his bottom lip. He shook his head and stood up from the ottoman. Why was he struggling with this? Having feelings for your patient? That’s completely inappropriate. 
He had to come up with a response that was the complete opposite of what he wanted to say. He wanted to tell her that he didn’t want her to get over him. He desires her just as much as she does him.
“…I keep thinking about the way Erik made me feel,” Y/N was staring off into the corner, lost in her words, “He has his demons, and he is a sadistic person, but he did it all for me. I was his world. He loved me and made love to me. And while I’m having sex with Erik in my delusions, it’s your face that I see.”
“…I told you why that is, Y/N, and why you have to let go. Every bit of information I’ve given you isn’t to steer you wrong. I can’t begin to imagine the struggle—”
“Ain’t no breathing or meds or forgiveness gonna stop me from wanting you, Erik.”
N’Jadaka locked eyes with Y/N. 
“I’m not Erik, my name is N’Jadaka. And you refer to me as Dr. Stevens.” N’Jadaka reminded her with a stern voice. 
“How long will it take for you to admit your feelings for me? Hm?”  Y/N threw her legs over the side of the chaise, standing up, “This back and forth is getting old. You said that we could talk about anything, right? Let’s talk about Erik.”
“Fine. Fine.”
N’Jadaka motioned for Y/N to have a seat. She didn’t recline back this time. Her back is ram-rod straight and she’s staring across at N’Jadaka like she wanted to eat him alive. He kept the connection going, watching her closely. 
“I thought you said that you hated Erik?”
Y/N pondered.
“I hate the way he makes me feel. He makes me feel helpless and complete at the same time. It’s scary. Like…being here kind of does.”
“Helpless and complete. Helpless in the fact that you can’t do anything about being here and complete…I’m going to be honest, what exactly makes you feel complete about your life now?”
Y/N stroked hair out of her face, “when I’m by myself…in my head…I feel…I feel alone. When I’m with you…I feel better. The hole in my chest fills up again.”
N’Jadaka’s jaw clenched. 
“Yes, you’re Erik in my delusions, but you’re Dr. Stevens in my reality. It keeps me balanced.”
_________________________________
When N’Jadaka had first laid eyes on Y/N, he could see how broken she was. He has all kinds of patients with many behavioral disorders. Sociopaths, PTSD, obsessive compulsions, phobias. And yet, when he’d seen Y/N and learned of what she’d done after reading her patient profile, N’Jakada could see that she was different. Her case of delusions was something beyond what N’Jadaka had ever imagined. 
To Y/N, her  psychiatrist knows her inner thoughts and feelings better than anyone. She can say anything to him and he doesn't judge her, but only seems to understand her better. She feels safe and comforted whenever she sees him. He knows just when to hand her a tissue when she's about to cry, and they share laughs together because her sense of humor is so like his. She finds herself looking forward to sessions and even wondering what to wear. She daydreams about him and wonders if he feels the same special connection to her. Perhaps she's become his favorite patient.
“…These are typical experiences of what occurs in many forms of psychotherapy that focus on exploring and understanding the patient's inner psychological life known as transference. It means that the patient is transferring feelings she has toward a parent or authority figure, onto the therapist…”
“…Erik is like an authority figure to you. He controls you. He keeps you handcuffed to his bed and you can never leave that beach house. He’s overprotective. Dominant. Unhinged. I’m hoping, Y/N, that you’ll gain some insight into your distortions onto other relationships in your life. With my help, you can come to grips with this pattern, put your distortions into perspective and move on with your life.” 
N’Jadaka tapped the pin in his hand against his notepad. Y/N sat wringing her hands, a nervous energy surrounding her. Maybe he was right. Maybe she didn’t actually love N’Jadaka. 
“I’m going to put you under,” N’Jadaka stood up and walked over to Y/N, “I want you to lay back and prop your feet up for me…good…now, close your eyes…that’s it…now, listen to the sound of my voice…”
Erik stood behind her while she reclined on the chaise. Her fingers are clasped over her abdomen and she looks like a sleeping beauty. He studied the contours of her beautiful features–more so her lips, and then he cleared his thoughts to speak.
“You’re at the luxury beach house. You can sense that the morning is approaching. As your eyes peel open, you scan the room and reality hits you. You’re cuffed to the bed once again…what have you done this time to upset Erik?”
Below him, Y/N’s breathing increases. Her face is contorted with fear and she brings her arms above her head to mimic the position that Erik has her in. 
“You can hear him coming into the room from the bathroom…what does he look like to you?”
Y/N licks her lips, “He–he’s naked.”
“Naked?” N’Jadaka’s eyes drop down to stare at her, “why is he naked?”
“I…I can smell the YSL body oil he puts on after he showers. It’s sweet yet…woodsy.”
N’Jadaka uses YSL body oil. He makes a mental note of that detail.
“So he’s taken a shower? What happens next?”
Y/N’s eyelids move rapidly. 
“He crawls on top of me..I scream…he covers my mouth…”
Y/N folds her lips into her mouth to mimic Erik’s hand covering her.
“He says…don’t scream…I won’t hurt you…I love you.”
“Do you believe him?” N’Jadaka questioned.
Y/N arched her back, thrusting her chest towards N’Jadaka. His eyes scan her body, wondering what is happening now.”
“What’s happening, Y/N? What is Erik doing to you?”
“H–he’s sucking my nipples.”
N’Jadaka arched a single brow, “So, you’re naked as well?”
“Yes,” Y/N exhaled, “He prefers me naked so that I’m ready for him.”
“Hm,” N’Jadaka grips the edge of the chaise, “Why do you keep giving into him?”
“Because he’s so addictive. No matter what he does…oh!”
N’Jadaka walks around the chaise, staring down at Y/N. He could feel his heart racing in his chest.
“What is it?” He questioned.
“Yessss,” Y/N raised her legs and spread them open, “Mmmm…just like that…”
“You seem to be enjoying Erik’s pleasures,” N’Jadaka didn’t move when her foot touched his chest. 
“Erik…why do you make me feel the way you do?”
N’Jadaka parted his lips but no words came out. Y/N’s sock covered foot smoothed down his chest until it was on his crotch. N’Jadaka inhaled, his fists tightly clenched as Y/N started massaging his erection with her foot. He couldn’t believe how hard he was. She would use her toes to rub the print of his tip and then she would slowly drag her foot up his shaft. He could feel himself throbbing and it ached him. 
“Time to wake up, Y/N.”
To his disappointment, her foot dropped, but the throbbing didn’t stop. He couldn’t remember the last time he was this turned on. N’Jadaka took a seat on the ottoman to try and hide his stiffness when Y/N sat up. Her curly hair was wild and the sweater she was wearing was hanging from her left shoulder. 
“You want to remain in these delusions because of Erik. I…I think it’s because of me and…maybe…”
“Maybe what?” Y/N said.
“Maybe it’s best that I stop being your psychiatrist. I feel that I am a trigger for you.”
Y/N was taken aback. 
“Where the fuck is this even coming from?” Y/N argues. 
“Watch your language,” N’Jadaka stood up, “I want you to get better. In order to do that, I have to make this sacrifice. I don’t want to—”
“Then don’t.” 
N’Jadaka looked at her, “It would be for the best—”
“For you? Or for me? Who are we really talking about right now?”
N’Jadaka sighed, “For the both of us.”
“Explain!” Y/N commanded.
“Lower…your…voice.”
N’Jadaka turned his back on her. The silence between them stretched on but the storm raging outside matched their inner turmoil. 
“Or what?” 
N’Jadaka placed his pad and pen on his desk. Y/N’s eyes scanned from his sturdy back all the way down to his legs. His arms are covered in bulging veins from his fists being clenched. 
“This stays between me and you.”
He turns, removing his glasses. He didn’t look away from her as he folded his frames before placing them on the desk. Y/N held her breath.
“I’ve grown to have feelings for you, Y/N. Feelings that I know I shouldn’t have. I try every time to–to be professional when it comes to you…but I can’t. I’ve become obsessed.”
Y/N couldn’t believe what she was hearing. 
“…And I know that I shouldn’t. Which is why we have to stop these sessions. There is another great psychiatrist here, Dr. Jane—”
“No. I refuse to see that bitch.”
“You know who she is?” 
“Yeah, and I don’t like her. I like you. So no. You’ll just have to fight the urges.”
N’Jadaka stroked his chin, “And will you?”
Y/N turned away from him and looked out of the window.
“You have to make me that promise, Y/N.”
“That’s the thing,” Y/N stood and made her way towards Dr. Stevens, “I don’t want to…”
“Then we can’t do this,” N’Jadaka looked down on her with his arms folded, “You know what happens if they find out? I lose my job. My practice. I will never get to see you again. You’ll never get better.”
Y/N looked up at N’Jadaka through her lashes, “No one has to know…”
N’Jadaka chuckles. Those dimples she loved appeared in his cheeks. 
“Easier said than done—Y/N, what are you doing?”
She’s on her knees in front of him now. N’Jadaka doesn’t make any attempts to stop her despite his words.
“Get up, now. I don’t want to have to pick you up myself.” He warned her. 
“I like how demanding you can be,” She smirked.
He fought the urge to smirk and Y/N giggled.
“I plan to be here for the rest of my life, N’Jadaka.”
“Fifteen years isn’t the rest of your life.”
“That’s if I’m being good,” Y/N traces N’Jadaka’s solid girth with her finger, “and I don’t want to be good…and I think you like it when I’m bad, right?”
N’Jadaka grunts. 
“Stop doing that.” He spoke darkly.
“Or…what?” Y/N challenged.
_____________________________
Somehow his pants found their way down to his ankles. His briefs were there too. 
The tightest mouth was practically inhaling his dick. Tip to base. He couldn’t believe it. Not what he was doing, but how impressive it is that she could fit him all the way down her throat. That shocked him more than her sucking his dick like those popsicles on a hot summer day. 
He was unbelievably hard. Each pass of her soft lips, wet tongue, and tight throat had him groaning. He lost all control and gripped her by her curly hair, guiding her. His hips started pumping as she was sucking and he imagined himself bending her over doing the same to her pussy. 
This was madness. How long before he comes to his senses? 
“Fuuck,” N’Jadaka spoke with a low register, “Suck that fuckin’ dick…”
He couldn’t hold back. Professionalism where?
He twitched in her mouth when she started slowly sucking on his top. He could feel his balls tighten.
“Y/N…that’s it…you’re such a bad girl…”
“…such a bad girl…yes…suck this dick like you would suck Erik’s dick…mhm…all the way down…that’s it…mhmmmm…”
She was back to doing it with no hands. N’Jadaka was staring at her with knitted brows and his bottom lip between his teeth.
“Does Erik make you swallow?” He questioned with a whisper.
Y/N nods her head.
“You better swallow every fucking drop of my cum, Y/N.”
Stroking him, she started sucking on his sack. 
“I bet that pussy is so wet…”
She popped her mouth off, “It is…for you.”
“I can’t wait to see it for myself.”
She ran her tongue up the length of his shaft and back down to his balls. She twisted his length at the base of his tip and N’Jadaka could feel pre-cum oozing from his slit to prepare for his release. 
“I’ve wanted to fuck you for so long…that perfect ass…that pretty mouth…those eyes…I beat my dick to you in bed at night…”
“I play in my pussy at night because of you, Doctor,” Y/N looked up at him while stroking him, “and I can show you just how I do that anytime you want…”
“You’re such a freak…”
“And so are you,” Y/N smiled, “This dick is so fat..”
“Stop playing with it and suck it.”
Y/N alternates between sucking his tip and balls. It was the way she took care of him that had him lost for words. All he could do was grunt and moan. Tongue on the underside of his length, N’Jadaka groaned and the sound was deep and sultry. He kept his eyes locked with hers as he coached her to bring him to climax. Over and over she would bring him closer and closer. 
N’Jadaka wasn’t prepared for the way his body seized all control. It hit him so suddenly. He quickly grabbed Y/N by the hair and shoved his hard dick into her mouth. He took control and pumped her mouth like a mad man. Spit flying and her gags filling the room, N’Jadaka spurt deep down her throat. His hips stuttered out of control the more she emptied him. 
“Look what you made me do.”
His saliva covered dick bounced in her face. The thinnest stream of cum dropped from his tip and Y/N used her tongue to clean him off. 
“Get up. We only have fifteen minutes left.”
N’Jadaka stepped out of his pants and took off his shirt. Y/N couldn’t believe how identical his body is to Erik’s. Muscles covered his entire frame. He had a thickness to him that screamed pick me up and toss me around. 
He did just that. 
N’Jadaka laid her down on the chair and started undressing her. She helped him so things could move along quicker. He climbed between her legs and took a nipple into his mouth. Y/N moaned softly, this feeling so foreign to her. She couldn’t recall the last time in reality that she had her nipples sucked on. To see this fine ass man do it and WANT to do it had her lost for words.
“That feels so good…please don’t stop, N’Jadaka.”
Y/N pressed her nose into his neck and inhaled his scent. He was warm to the touch and soft yet sturdy. 
N’Jadaka popped a nipple out of his mouth, “I want that pussy in my mouth…”
Y/N shoved his head down between her legs. His teeth dragged over the skin of her abdomen before finding the mass of curls between her legs. That turned him on even more. Frustratingly, N’Jadaka positioned Y/N so that she was slightly on her side with one leg elevated and the other bent out of the way. He got down on his knees and spread her outer lips with his tongue. 
“Ooooh, shit,” Y/N’s thighs shook out of control, “Dr. Stevens…”
With a fist full of his locs, she rode the pleasure. He had his entire face buried between her hairy pussy lips and he didn’t give a fuck. All she could see was his nose pressed into her mound and his eyes shut. He was making all kinds of sounds down there like some primal animal. That tongue and those plump lips were working overtime to make her cum. Whenever she would move her legs, he would force them back. His hands were firm and at times it hurt the way he was holding her legs. His tongue was unrelenting. His lips were lapping her up as if it were his last supper. 
“Unh, fuck,” Y/N couldn’t say much else. He had spit dripping from her pussy. He had her clit swollen and sensitive. He was doing things with his mouth that she never felt before. Tongue in her pussy? Never. He had her muttering incoherent words when he used the tip of his tongue to flick her clit. 
When he started sucking on her clit, Y/N had to cover her mouth to keep quiet. He opened his eyes then and watched her closely. It was an unspoken command to shut the fuck up and take it. What good will it do to make it known that he was eating her pussy? If she made a sound, it would mean no more of this in the future. Y/N couldn’t have that. Dr. Stevens couldn’t have that. 
She couldn’t explain the way he was sucking on her inner folds. No words could describe it. He did it like he waited his entire life for this moment. The desire he felt for her resonates with the way his lips suckled her expertly. She could hear the raunchy sounds and to her shock he even dragged his tongue through her wet curls. 
Y/N bites down on her lip, drawing blood, fighting with all her might to not moan out loud. When he started sucking all over her pussy with his hands on the back of her knees, leaving not one spot untouched, Y/N’s mouth dropped open and her eyes crossed. Toes curling, thighs shaking, body convulsing, she came in his mouth. The hold she had on his locs was enough to scalp him. 
N’Jadaka finally came up for air. His heavy breathing and wet beard turned her on so badly. 
“We only have eight minutes…”
He didn’t waste time picking her up and carrying her over to his desk. He pushed all of his belongings out of the way with a rush and sat her on the edge of his desk. She let him move her body in whatever position he wanted her in. He decided on holding her by her ankles up in the air and whispered in her ear to hold on. 
“Keep still, Y/N. When I put this dick in you…you better not make a sound, understand?”
Y/N nodded her head and N’Jadaka wasted no time sinking deep inside of her. His eyes shot up to give her a warning look to keep quiet but how could she when he thrust inside of her like that? She wasn’t prepared. It’s one thing to have delusions about the dick, but to feel it in reality? He stretched her good.
N’Jadaka for a moment couldn’t believe how tight she was. He began snapping his hips into hers, wanting to feel it again, watching the way his dick would enter her. There was a lot of wetness down there. He almost slipped out a few times. Y/N had to hold his waist with one hand. His locs fell into his eyes and it reminded her of Erik. The way he stroked her reminded her of Erik. 
“I wish I could take you home with me,” He whispered between strokes. 
“So you can do what?” Y/N asked with a seductive tone.
“So I can put you like this and in any other position I want.”
“You love this fucking pussy?” 
“Yes,” N’Jadaka pressed forward and held his dick there, “I don’t have to ask if you love this dick, I can tell…look at all this mess.”
Y/N’s eyes fell to the creamy mess all over him. 
“Didn’t know that pussy could do that, huh?” He whispered.
Y/N’s mouth fell open but no sound came out. Tears fell down her cheeks because of his words and because he was hitting her spot. He picked her up and dropped her down onto his dick. She let him take control of her body. She was so small compared to him. 
“Daddy, I can’t take it like this,” Y/N said.
“I’m daddy now? You’re gonna take it like a good girl.”
Y/N felt as if she was ready to burst, “Wait—”
“You pushing?” He looked down, “Don’t squirt…”
She didn’t listen. Thankfully it wasn’t a lot.
“You don’t listen, Y/N.”
N’Jadaka pressed her back against the desk and he was practically on top of her, dropping ten inches deep. She gasped, unable to control the liquid that followed. At this point N’Jadaka didn’t care. He was close. She felt amazing. What did he get himself into?
“This my fucking pussy…”
She didn’t argue that. 
“Don’t look away from me,” He commanded, “I want you to look at me when you cum.”
Y/N was in a trance staring up at him. Her body jerked beneath him and as her back arched, she came all over him, making even more of a mess. 
“Ahhhh, yes,” He withdrew his hips and came all over her stomach, “Hmmmm…”
N’Jadaka bit down on her shoulder. Y/N wrapped her arms around his neck.  She wanted to stay like this. With his cum sticking to her flesh and his still hard dick resting between the lips of her pussy. 
“We have to get dressed…”
Reluctantly, he peeled himself from her embrace. He helped Y/N down from the table and she rushed to get her clothes on. They were all dressed in time for Anthony to come knocking on the door. One last look at Y/N and N’Jadaka grabbed her by the face to kiss her. He hadn’t kissed her the entire time. 
He broke the kiss, “Give us a second.”
His tongue slithered into her mouth and they kissed like that for what felt like five minutes. 
“Alright,” he pulled away after she sucked on his bottom lip, “You have to get back to your room. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?”
Y/N pressed her face into his chest to remember his scent. 
“I’m looking forward to it, Dr. Stevens.”
N’Jadaka grabbed her by the hand and squeezed while his other hand tapped her on the ass. He walked her to the door and finally let go of her hand. Opening the door, Anthony was waiting patiently with her cuffs. She fought hard not to look back at him because it would give too much away.
“Same time, after dinner.” 
Anthony started making his way down the hall pulling Y/N along, reminding her that she was imprisoned to this place.
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lanadeldixon · 8 months
Text
Summertime Sadness
Pairing- Daryl x fem reader (some Rosita x reader if you squint)
Word count- 1.1k
Warnings- angst, implied panic attack, mentions of death, someone being beaten, starved Daryl :(
Setting- s7 Alexandria
Summary- The saviours come to collect their 50%, but when you see the condition Daryl is in it’s hard to cope.
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“Oh my God,” I whispered “Daryl?” His name a symphony of worry on my lips. A name I used to say with such love now drained of its positivity and filled with fear instead.
Vulnerability shone through his eyes as he turned to me, “Y/N?”
As soon as my name fell from his lips, the end of a gun struck him straight in the jaw, the loud thud of his body hitting the ground echoed through the town.
My breath hitched and a tear rolled down my cheek as they hit him again, yelling at him, “SPEAK WHEN YOU’RE SPOKEN TOO!”
“Leave him alone,” my voice choked up to the point where it came out in only a whisper.
“Let him go,” I cried louder this time, desperate to draw them away.
Hands wrapped around my mouth, too quick for me to react, my screams came out as muffled cries as I attempted to call for help.
But it was no use, I was dragged backwards into my house,
“Shh, you have to calm down, okay?” I immediately un-tensed at the sound of her voice.
“You gotta be tough, you do shit like that you’ll get all of us killed.” Rosita exclaimed sternly.
Her hands released me and she circled me until we were eye to eye.
“You’re not gonna be doing us any favours getting yourself killed,” it was clear to see she was still in grief, she was mourning a man she’d killed off in her mind a long time ago, only now he was truly gone and it was still sinking in.
She had become colder, no one could blame her, however all of us were too busy drowning in our own insurmountable grief and missing loved ones to pay attention to anything else.
I nodded at her like a school kid following her teachers orders then opened my mouth preparing to respond.
“Bam!” The door swung open.
“We said 50% didn’t we?!” His voice shook us to the core.
Whispers of the dead conquered my thoughts as I turned to look at him.
“Woah ho ho well you must be the girl?!”
Negan exclaimed following it with a slight laugh.
“Well you sure are a pretty thing ain’t ya!” His hand reached to my face as he said it, I stared him down, not daring to move but still not hiding my resentment.
“If I weren’t such a fan of your boy Daryl I think I’d have to make you one of my wives,” a sinister grin took over his face as my mine began to pale.
He leaned close to my ear, to the point where I could feel the warmth of his breath as he spoke, “Hell, im the boss, I could just do it anyway…”
I tried to hold back my anger, to not say anything out of fear of what he might do. But the idea of having to marry him sickened and overwhelmed me, “fuck you,” I snarled, eyes finally meeting his.
“You got some massive lady balls and I gotta say, I dig that.” He stated, pulling his face away.
“I’m so tempted to bring you home darling.” He finished, deep down I knew he was just teasing but the thought revolted me.
“I would never be the wife of someone like you,” I responded, my face scrunching up.
He looked at me still with that daring smile.
At that point I couldn’t taken it anymore, my rage boiled until finally, it spilled, I looked at him and let out a large wad of spit aiming it right at his leg.
“Go to hell,” I stated, storms in my eyes.
His face finally faltered as he stared at the stain on his trousers.
“Ho ho ho, you bitch,” he said grabbing the back of my hair and yanking me outside of the house.
“How about we put on a little show, huh darling” he purred in my ear.
I felt ill as he forced me to my knees and began to gesture with Lucille.
“Now I was gonna be nice today but it seems some of you still need an example of how to behave.” Everyone stopped what they were doing and turned as he spoke.
I didn’t cry, I was very careful to heed Rosita’s advice and made sure I didn’t once show my fear, Daryl however did not do the same…
“Y/N!” He screamed as if I was already dead.
“DONT TOUCH HER,” he cried with rage, “I’LL KILL YA!”
“Bring him,” calmly, he gestured to the woman on his right as he spoke.
She dragged him so he was diagonal to me, she then kept her hands on his face, forcing him to keep his eyes on me.
Now I knew to be scared but all I could think was how tired he looked, behind the rage and upset was masked malnutrition and exhaustion. I couldn’t help but worry.
“We’re gonna break up another couple tonight,” he laughed aiming and fake swinging his bat at me.
I grimaced at his statement recalling the story of what happened to Glenn and Abraham and the devastation Maggie and Sasha were left with.
“I’m sorry, you would’ve been a real treat to come home too but looks like you’re gonna end up another lost treasure.”
“Last chance to say goodbye lover boy,” Negan warned.
Daryl was screaming profanities at him, doing everything he could to divert Lucille’s attention to him instead but to my relief, his attempts failed…
That was when the countdown started…
“10…” my breathing quickened.
“9…” I could see Daryl’s mouth moving, his whole body scrambling beneath the saviours holding him back, but all I could hear was Negans voice.
“8…” “just continue to do this when you’re scared okay baby?” I could hear my mums voice infiltrating my thoughts, guiding me to breathe.
“7…” I can see the flowers, they look so pretty, especially now that the lilies have grown, my mother didn’t like lilies, she always loved roses.
“6…” I can see the sun, it shines so brightly today, beaming down its light onto all of us, I think of Daryl’s nickname for me.
“5…” I can see my friends, I love my friends. Part of me wishes I could see Maggie again, the other doesn’t want her to see this.
“4…” I can see the sky, it looks painted today, the way the clouds are floating looks ethereal.
“3…” I can see Daryl. My Daryl, I smile.
“2…” I can see the bat, it blocks the sun as it’s lifted high into the sky.
“1…” I can see Glenn and Abraham, I didn’t think I’d see them so soon but I’m happy-
“I’LL JOIN YA!” Silence overcame the crowd as Daryl pleaded.
“Just let her go, that’s all I ask” his voice quaked, there was a frantic look of desperation in his eyes.
Silence…
Negan chuckled before his face turned stern.
“Who are you?” He commanded in a teasing tone.
“I am Negan…”
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withlove-amber · 2 months
Text
Brighter Than the Stars
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gibbs x reader
“What’s your perfect way to decompress after work?” Abby asked (Y/N), the youngest member of the team. (Y/N) wasn’t sure how to answer the question. Should she say what she was really thinking? Or maybe something else, out of fear of being judged. But, when (Y/N) joined the team, she quickly realized that Abby doesn’t judge anyone, so she had nothing to fear. With that, she responded with her true answer, “It would have to be stargazing.” “Stargazing, that’s so cool!”, the forensic scientist responded. “Thanks! I know it’s not really an ‘adult’ thing to do, but for me, there’s nothing I like more after work than laying back and watching the stars shine.” “That was the most perfect answer ever, I was just going to say bowling.” Little did they both know, Gibbs was outside Abby’s lab overhearing the whole conversation.
The day went on, the team said their goodnights, and went their separate ways for the night. Right before (Y/N) could unlock her car, Gibbs stopped her and asked, “Do you wanna do somethin’ with me tonight?” “Sure. What do you have in mind?”, the young agent replied. “It’s a surprise, but don’t worry, you’ll love it.” She thought for sure she would be helping work on the boat in his basement (not that he needs help). But when he parked his truck in an old field, she started to wonder if he overheard her conversation with Abby earlier. Her suspicions were confirmed when he said, “Bring the blanket.” 
He opened the door for her, and during the short walk to the bed of his truck, he asked her, “Do you have a favorite star?” “Not really, to be honest, I love them all. Being able to admire the stars just fills me with so much peace.” “How?”, he asked the young agent whom he was starting to fall for. “There’s just something about looking up at the sky and seeing how radiantly they shine.” she replied, unknowingly smiling almost as bright as the stars hundreds of light years away. After he made his way onto the truck bed, he helped her up by gently taking her hand and holding her waist. She’d be lying if she said it didn’t give her butterflies. 
He made a motion for her to lie down, as he did the same. He threw a large blanket on top of them both, and their surroundings felt 10° warmer. They spent the first few minutes lying underneath the starlight in complete silence, just being. He was the first to break the silence, saying, “I remember as a kid staying up for hours in the summertime just to watch the stars. I’d go to bed when the sun’d come up and pretend like I’d been in bed the whole night.” They spent the next several hours talking about fond childhood memories, childhood pets, anything, and everything. He taught her which stars were which, how to navigate the stars, trying to ignore the warm feeling he felt every single time she smiled. She had also tried to ignore the warm feeling she felt every single time he smiled, or any time he had talked about his childhood so fondly. 
After the conversation had started to die down, she let out a yawn, neither of them realizing it was now the middle of the night. In a moment of bravery, she gently laid her head down on his shoulder, claiming him as her pillow for the night. When he didn’t move, she knew she was safe. She always feels safe when she’s with Gibbs. And he always feels safe when he’s with her. “Goodnight (Y/N).” “Goodnight Jethro.” In that moment, he realized not only does he really like it when she uses his name and not just “boss” or “Gibbs”, but he also realized she seemed to fit perfectly in his arms. He spent the next several moments breathing in her scent, which consisted of her perfume and the soft vanilla and lavender from her shampoo. He finally fell asleep holding her close, after kissing her forehead.
They woke up the next morning, as the sun rose over the very same field that was host to countless stars the night before. Then they spent the next several minutes observing each other’s features. She observing every freckle on his face, how his eyes seemed to be much brighter and appear much more blue than they’d ever been, how the soft sunlight made his hair appear brighter and if she looked hard enough, his silver strands of hair seemed to softly glow in the morning sun. He observing how the sun was making her hair appear brighter and softer than it’s ever looked before, how her natural freckles were illuminated by the sun’s soft rays, how plush and smooth her lips look. Being in each other’s cozy embrace made them both think, “I could stay here forever and never want to leave.”
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rillils · 3 months
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i hate my angst loving self so much sometimes
think about a confused and not-entirely-there bucky screaming at steve, asking him why he left him there on the snow, asking why he didnt come back for him, telling him how long he waited for him to come and save him
FINE HONEY, YOU WANTED ANGST, I'LL GIVE YOU ANGST. AND I'LL CRY ABOUT IT 😭
warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, tw: suicidal thoughts, very mild gore, nightmares, post-catws, angst is definitely not my thing what am i even doing here asjdhsjdh wordcount: 3815 a side note: while the language here is used in accordance with steve's profound sense of guilt, it doesn't reflect the author's personal beliefs on the matter - aka IT'S NOT HIS FAULT SKDLKS MY POOR BABY 😭😭
It always starts off quiet, like the darkened hall of a theater in the split second between the curtain opening over the stage and the actor’s first line. Silence, please. The show is about to begin.
The scenery changes sometimes, but it’s the mountains Steve sees most often in his dreams: the soulless gray of stone, and the blinding white of snow coating everything, from the peaks, to the valley, to the copse of fir trees, huddled together like children in the cold. Just like he remembers from that day in the Alps. No one knows how to torture him better than his own mind.
The wind rises sharp and icy, lifting sleets of frost with it, and a chill rolls down Steve’s spine. It’s not the cold, though.
It’s fear, congealing like a dead weight in the pit of his stomach. The show is about to begin. And he’s watched it all to the end countless times before.
“Steve?”
His head whips around, and Bucky’s right there, like he always is. A fixed point, unchanged, unmovable, his boots sinking soundlessly in the thick layer of snow beneath them.
He looks so beautiful, so oddly alive against the backdrop of his desolate place; a man at the peak of his youth, the pink of his cheeks nearly glowing next to the deep blue of his uniform, his hair combed to a movie-star shine, parted neatly to the side. It’s cruel, how perfect he is. Preserved like a cherished heirloom in Steve’s mind, never fading, never aging; a living picture, soft and rosy-cheeked. He belongs in a dance hall, in a crowded street, in the cheerful chaos of the fourth of July, in the color and noise of fireworks, in the tangle of ooh’s and aah’s under the firelit sky. He doesn’t belong here. But he’ll never leave this place.
“What are you doing here?” Bucky’s head tilts to the side, confused. “You left a long time ago.”
“Bucky,” Steve tries to say, but the name dies on his lips.
The light in Bucky’s eyes dulls to a flicker, carrying a heavy gloom over his features. He looks so sad, all of a sudden. He never looked sad when Steve was around, Steve remembers that – and Steve never learned how to make it better.
He can never make this better.
“Steve.” All the color’s draining from his cheeks, quickly, leaving only the paleness of death behind. His eyes – they pierce right through Steve, empty and cold, so cold, and Steve shudders from head to toe.
“I waited for you for so long,” Bucky’s blue lips say, with a mournful lilt Steve used to hear in his mother’s voice when she would sing to him, all those heart-twisting songs about a home she’d never see again. “Where were you?”
Something dark spreads from within across the pristine blue of Bucky’s coat, dripping slowly from his shoulder, black like ink–
blood
– smothering the rich color underneath, reaching down, down–
he fell
– down along Bucky’s arm, until it’s streaking the back of his hand–
blood, it’s blood, he fell, he’s going to fall
– pooling ruby-dark at Bucky’s fingertips.
Soon the drops will spill all over the fresh snow, staining it red, too.
“You left me here.”
Steve can’t breathe.
“Why did you leave me here, Steve?”
Steve can’t breathe.
“I’m so sorry,” he gasps, and the next breath stings in his lungs, ice-cold and merciless, “I’m so sorry, Bucky, so sorry. It’s all my fault, all my fault,” he chants, hands clawing at his own chest. But what will it help? He can’t undo this. He can never undo this. “I should have held onto you,” he sobs brokenly, and it’s strange, how he can never tell when he starts crying in his dreams, but he always feels the tears streaming down his face, real as his grief is real, clogging up his throat. “I never should have let you fall.”
Bucky steps forward, dark blood trailing behind him on the ground. Steve’s heart jolts like a spooked horse, pounding loud and fast with adrenaline.
“Why didn’t you look for me?”
He sounds so gentle. So devastatingly sad.
“Did I mean so little to you?”
Steve shakes his head, No, no, no, everything, you meant everything, always, I swear, tears flicking off the edge of his jaw to be lost in the snow-packed wind. “I t-thought you were dead,” he sobs, like he’s still curled up into the blown-up flank of that train, like he’s still got his face pressed to the ice-burn of its metal and praying for everything to end, now, before reality can reshape itself around him and tell him that Bucky is gone forever.
Something mean slithers behind Bucky’s eyes. “And you would have left my body to the wolves?” he says, his voice dangerously sharp over the moaning wind. “You didn’t think I deserved a proper burial?”
It’s snowing on the outside, but it’s inside that Steve feels ice gripping at his guts.
“You could have sent me home to my folks.”
It burns.
“To my sisters.”
It burns so bad, the shame crackling under his skin.
“At least then my family would have had a body to cry over. But it never even occurred to you, did it.”
Steve’s tongue feels glued to the roof of his mouth. “I’m so sorry,” he pushes out uselessly, “I’m so sorry, I should’ve–”
“Or did you think that I was like you?” Bucky presses on, a cruel sneer forming on his white face. “Is that it? You fooled yourself so nice, you really thought I was like you? Like poor little Stevie? With no one left in the world who would miss me? No one who would even care if I was dead or alive?” He pauses, lips curling as though a new and amusing thought only just occurred to him. “Oh. Stevie, no. Did you think you were my whole world? Are you really that pathetic?”
“No,” Steve rasps, swallowing back tears and still drowning, drowning in them, “I never thought, I never– Please, Buck, I’m so sorry–”
Bucky’s silhouette blinks in and out of sight, and when he comes back, one moment later, he’s standing right before Steve, so close he need only reach out to touch him. His sneer is gone, but the depth of hurt in his eyes slices at Steve’s heart just as sharply.
“They took me, Stevie. You left me behind and they took me. Look,” he says, showing Steve the torn flesh where his left arm used to be – it was here just a moment ago, it was, Steve could swear it, it was right here – the bloody pulp of it, a frayed shard of white bone jutting out through the ripped muscle, sickening. His mouth, when Steve can finally look back, is curled back to show his teeth, the smile almost kind if it didn’t feel like a knife tearing at Steve’s own flesh. “This is all your doing. Isn’t it pretty?” Bucky tells him sweetly. “Tell me it’s pretty, Steve. Tell me it’s pretty.”
Without warning, Bucky’s hand darts up to clamp around Steve’s chin, gripping his face viciously. His touch is like ice, searing painfully into Steve’s skin, and Steve staggers in place, helpless but to look right into Bucky’s wide, desperate eyes.
“I was so scared,” Bucky whispers, hot tears spilling over his deathly pale cheeks. “I was locked in that place for so long, I couldn’t tell day from night anymore. It was so cold, and I was so alone, so alone without you, Stevie.”
His fingernails claw into Steve’s skin until they’re drawing blood, and Steve can only sob, can only take it, can only hope this will sate the hollowness he sees in Bucky’s eyes, if only for an instant. But it won’t, he knows it won’t. It never does.
If he could kneel at Bucky’s feet and beg for his forgiveness, keep him warm with the heat of his own tears, wash the blood away–
“I thought I was going to die. Every time they dragged me back to that table, I would tell myself, this is it. This is how it’s going to end,” Bucky tells him gently, nodding his head. “Sometimes, I even thought I should end it myself, before they could. But do you know what the worst part was? I didn’t die. No matter how bad I wanted it, none of the stuff they put me through ever did it. Hope kept me alive,” he snarls, soft through his bloodied smile. “That was my curse. I believed in you. I thought you would find me, save me. I told them you would come for me, and they laughed in my face, Stevie! They knew better.”
The sound that spills from Bucky’s mouth is the twisted, poisoned imitation of a laugh, emptied of all feeling, sharp like fingernails scraped across a blackboard.
“Don’t say that,” Steve whimpers, shaking his head, “please, don’t say that, no.” And he’d cover his ears if he could, lock that ugly truth out of his mind forever, but no muscle in his body will move until Bucky’s done with him.
“Do you know what happened then, Steve? You do know, don’t you?” Bucky asks, thrusting his face into Steve’s until only mere inches separate the tips of their noses – his eyes staring into Steve’s, a creeping echo of insanity gleaming from their depths. “They took my arm first, and then they took everything else.”
Hell. This is Hell.
“Because of you.”
This is what true torment looks like. No fire and brimstone, no howling souls of the damned, no blazing hail raining down upon him.
“It was always because of you.”
Just him and Bucky’s ghost, and a winter that never thaws.
“Bucky...”
The snowstorm rises against him with violence, angry, roaring in Steve’s ears, spreading frost over his chest, his arms, his bare face, freezing the tears caught in his eyelashes. Quiet, it demands. Don’t you speak to me. You have no right to speak to me.
But the yawning hole in Steve’s chest won’t stop screaming at him, starved for forgiveness, for a respite, for a mercy he never earned.
“Please, Buck... please...”
Bucky’s hand guides him down, pushing him to his knees. He crouches over Steve, gaze locked with his, heedless of the blood dripping dark and thick between his fingers; leaning in like he’s about to share a secret.
“I held out until I just couldn’t anymore. I tried to be strong, for you,” Bucky says in a harsh whisper. “But you never came.” His face, twisted by grief, wet with new tears. Steve cups it in his palms, but it’s no use: he can’t soothe this hurt. It’s too late now.
“Bucky, Bucky, sweetheart, forgive me– please, forgive me...”
Bucky’s grip on him relents; his fingers smear red over Steve’s cheek, four bloody streaks, and he strokes his knuckles over them, unbearably gentle.
“I waited for you for so long,” he says, mournful. His face is as cold as ice between Steve’s hands, stinging, burning. “Why didn’t you look for me?”
It hurts, it hurts so bad, so deep inside Steve’s heart.
“Why didn’t you look for me?”
The wind surges up around them, rattling Steve’s bones from within. The snow’s soaking into his pants, swallowing up his knees, colder, colder, the blizzard’s smothering him, blinding him, only Bucky’s eyes bright in his vision, crying, accusing, screaming, screaming, screaming–
“WHY DIDN’T YOU LOOK FOR ME?”
-
Steve jerked awake in the darkness, gasping for breath, a handful of sheets clutched dangerously tight in his fist. He barely even registered the soft, alarmed noise coming from the other side of the bed.
“Steve? It’s all right, you’re safe now.”
His eyes scoured the dark bedroom frantically, fighting through the chilling veil of ice still creeping at the edge of his vision. His heart hammered loud like thunder in his ears, pulsing so wildly in his throat, he thought for a moment that it would burst out of his body.
“Steve.”
Where was he?
The mountains–
“It was just a dream. You’re safe now, I promise. You’re home.”
His gaze focused on the only source of light: the faint glow filtering in through the blinds, the familiar orange hue of the street lights in their neighborhood, casting a striped pattern on the floor. A rug, there was a rug there – and a pair of slippers flicked just a bit too far from the bed.
“Come back to me, baby.”
The crumpled lumps of two discarded socks, that never made it to the hamper – oh, Bucky hated it when he did that.
“Sweetheart, can you look at me?”
A flicker of white–
– snow–
– Alpine, uncurling from her favorite spot and slipping soundlessly out of the room.
“Can you look at me? Steve.”
He turned his head towards the sound, staring wide-eyed into the shadows until finally, the outline of Bucky’s body emerged, sitting only an arm’s length away from him.
“That’s it, that’s good, Stevie.”
There was kindness in his voice, but his brow was creased with worry. His torso was half-twisted towards Steve, his body poised as though ready to reach out for him, but Bucky hadn’t touched him yet. Good, that was good. No. It hurt. That hurt.
Steve swallowed.
“Breathe with me, sweetheart. Can you do that? For me? Slow and easy, c’mon, with me.”
It was only then that Steve became aware of his own heavy breaths, the harsh sound of which filled up the room, gasp after gasp. He let go of the sheets and lay his hand on his own chest, where he could feel his pounding heartbeat, and tried to match Bucky’s calm, measured breathing as best as he could. He thought he was going to throw up.
“That’s it, just like that,” Bucky encouraged him.
Bucky–
Something flashed before Steve’s eyes; a fragment of a pale white face, with sneering lips and blood-stained teeth, taunting him with its cruel laughter.
You left me behind and they took me.
“It’s okay. It’s okay. It was just a dream, it wasn’t real.”
Bucky shifted minutely on the bed, and a fleck of light caught the metal plates of his arm, a silver gleam darting quickly in the night.
Steve’s chin trembled. His throat closed up.
They took my arm first, and then they took everything else.
The tears came back before he could stop them, gathering hotly behind his eyes, pressing urgently to spill over.
“Bucky,” he choked out, and in the next moment he was crawling into Bucky’s open arms, curling his shaking body into Bucky’s sturdy frame. Bucky cradled him close, rubbing a soothing hand between Steve’s shoulder blades as Steve sobbed freely, pouring all of his anguish in the crook of Bucky’s neck.
“W-when you fell,” Steve stammered pitifully, clutching at the back of Bucky’s t-shirt with the desperation of a drowning man, “I should have come looking for you, I should’ve been there, should’ve– should’ve brought you back, I–”
“No, no, Steve,” Bucky rumbled, rocking him gently in his arms, “don’t do this to yourself. Please, baby, I’m begging you.”
Steve shook his head no, hiding himself deeper into the nook offered by Bucky’s neck, just beneath the hinge of his jaw. His chest felt too tight, too full – like a balloon filled with water and straining to contain it, the paper-thin skin tense to the point of bursting.
“I should have come for you, they – they never would have taken you, I wouldn’t have let them,” he stumbled on helplessly, “I would have died first! God, I would’ve... I would have died first, I swear, Buck, I swear...”
Bucky stroked his hand over Steve’s hair, kissing the spot above the shell of his ear, dark with cold sweat. Steve felt the dampness of it across his whole body, under the clinging cotton of his pyjamas, the unpleasant moisture cooling on his skin and leaving him to shudder in Bucky’s embrace.
“Look at me,” Bucky called softly. It was a simple request, laced with just the same gentleness Bucky would use sometimes to coax Alpine into his arms, but still Steve felt panic pool in his stomach.
He couldn’t. He couldn’t bear to look Bucky in the eye, not like this. Not when the truth – Because of you. It was always because of you. – was out at last.
What a scam he was. A whole lifetime spent preaching bravery, and the one time it truly mattered, he couldn’t even be brave enough to face the consequences of his own mistakes.
Please, don’t hate me, he sobbed silently against Bucky’s neck. You should. You have every right to. But please... please...
“Sweetheart, please, look at me.”
It took more strength than Steve had ever even known he possessed, but slowly, hesitantly, he let himself be pulled out of his hiding spot, and lifted his gaze to meet Bucky’s, if only for a fleeting moment.
Bucky’s flesh hand reached up to cup his jaw, working his thumb tenderly over Steve’s skin to wipe his tears away – a sweet, but fruitless endeavor, as more salty tears rolled down Steve’s cheeks, relentless.
“The truth is, neither of us could have known I would survive that fall,” Bucky said.
Steve shook his head, his eyes screwed shut against the flood of fresh tears. “I should’ve tried anyway, I should have come to you. I should have been there with you.”
Bucky grasped him by the arms, barely squeezing at all. The force wasn’t in his touch; it was in his voice, quiet to match the nighttime gloom, but firm nonetheless.
“What if they had taken you, too? What if they’d made you like me, what then?” he said, an edge of desperation coloring his voice, as if he couldn’t bear the very thought. “Do you think you could have lived with yourself, if you’d woken up one day to find that you had the blood of innocents on your hands?”
Steve’s head snapped up then, heat flashing fiercely in his chest. “What would I have cared, when you were there with me!” he cried out, panting heavily in the wake of that outburst.
Perhaps he couldn’t call this bravery; but when Steve could breathe again, their eyes finally met again.
If he’d feared he would see hate, or disdain, or resentment looking back at him, he didn’t find any of those. What he did find instead, staring at him from Bucky’s ever-familiar face, was the stubborn mark of love, shimmering brightly in Bucky’s eyes.
“Of course you would have cared,” Bucky whispered fiercely, cradling Steve’s face in both of his hands. “It would have killed you, and it would have killed me too. I could have never, ever forgiven myself, if they’d gotten their filthy hands on you because of me.”
His voice wavered, heavy with the weight of unshed tears. Steve could see the glossy sheen of them, threatening to spill over Bucky’s cheeks any second now, and felt his own heart split in two at the sight.
“Bucky,” he rasped, wetly, clasping Bucky’s wrists with his own hands to hold onto them, turning his face into those beloved palms to kiss them helplessly, one and then the other. Bucky never stopped holding him.
“Listen to me,” he said urgently, “listen to me now. We can’t change the past. We can’t, Steve.” A new sob ripped itself painfully from Steve’s throat, one he couldn’t have helped if he wanted to. “We can’t. It’s done, it’s there, we can’t take it back. And God, do I wish we could, believe me. But I want you to hear me when I say this: I am so grateful for what we have now. In the present. Our present.”
He took a deep, shuddering breath that rippled through his whole frame, as he openly struggled to keep his words clear and his voice steady. He was always the braver one, Steve thought, thrusting one of his hands out to grab a fistful of Bucky’s t-shirt, right over his breastbone.
“Steve. God, could you have ever dreamed that we could have this? I never even dared to hope for something like it, not even on my best days.”
He paused. Steve clung to him, his chest tight with emotion.
“The way we got here... Would I have chosen that? If I’d been given a choice, would I have wanted it to happen like that? No, of course not,” Bucky continued. “But if you asked me now, would I do it all over again, just for a chance to be here with you? I would say yes.” Steve whimpered, shaking his head, tears rolling down his face; but Bucky held him firmly, looking him right in the eye and nodding just as stubbornly, a watery smile on his lips. “Yes, Steve. Yes. A million times yes.”
He broke at last, and Steve lost what little control he had of himself. He tugged Bucky forward by his shirt and threw his arms around him, crushing their bodies together as if his life depended on it. Bucky returned the embrace with that same urgency, holding him tight as Steve muffled his sobs against Bucky’s shoulder, and buried his face in Steve’s hair in return.
The pinprick-like sensation of Bucky’s tears wetting his skin, as Bucky trembled quietly against him, felt like a bruise to Steve’s naked heart.
“Forgive me,” he begged, and he couldn’t have said what it was that he was seeking forgiveness for: if the pain he had caused Bucky now, or the one he couldn’t prevent so long ago.
“There is nothing to forgive,” Bucky murmured in his ear, his voice thick. “But I’ll say it, if you need to hear it.”
“Please,” Steve whimpered.
Bucky hugged him impossibly closer. “I forgive you. Always, sweetheart.”
The tightness within Steve’s chest unraveled, and in that moment, he breathed anew. Relief washed over him – and he cried, and cried, like a person cries when they’re gifted with kindness for the first time in a very, very long time, he cried until he thought he’d exhausted all his tears.
Bucky laid them both back against his pillow, chest to chest, shushing Steve’s hiccupping breaths with whispers of sweet nothings, never once letting him go.
“All that’s left to do now,” he said softly then, pressing a kiss to Steve’s brow, “is for you to forgive yourself.”
Steve burrowed deeper into his warmth, spent.
It would take a long time for that, and a tough, strenuous walk on the tortuous path towards that healing place. In the meantime, though, he could wrap himself into the safety of Bucky’s arms, and slip into a dreamless sleep for once.
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Text
A Khan By Any Other Name
a prequel to Star Trek: Into Darkness
mystery, suspense, danger ~ romance & NSFW material to follow
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summary: Seraphina DiPietro is wise in the ways of the world; she has to be, as she travels the California coast as a torch singer in pubs, bars, and nightclubs. She knows how to take care of herself and stay out of trouble--most of the time. When trouble comes, it's usually because she lets her kind heart overrule her common sense. Stopping to check on a handsome stranger stranded roadside in the Mojave Desert, her curiousity is piqued as much by his classic, mint-looking Mustang, as by its driver--a tall, dark, mysterious drink of water, whom she quickly learns is so much more than he appears.
characters: Khan Noonien Singh (aka: John Harrison), Seraphina DiPietro (OC)
words: 1.9k
Chapter Two
“Drop it now,” he repeated, with the sure authority of a man accustomed to having his orders obeyed, “And I promise I will not hurt you.”
Despite his iron grip, Seraphina struggled to pull her arm away, hissing through teeth gritted against the pain, “Won’t hurt me?  You’re hurting me now.”
Harrison’s hold on her arm loosened some; she was still tightly caught, but the pressure of his grasp, the pain, had receded a fair bit—although she knew she’d find dark, finger-shaped bruises there in short order.  If she even lived that long. “Forgive me,” he told her, his voice low and even, “I’d forgotten how fragile your bones can be.”
What an odd thing to say, she thought, straining for release from his clutch and realizing it was all too impossible; she was no match for his strength, and even if she could manage to trigger the mace, she had no sure way to aim it properly.  She felt desperate, frightened tears well up in her eyes, but squeezed her eyes shut against them—for she would not give her assailant the satisfaction of her despair, nor would she beg for mercy.
He must’ve read that quiet resignation on her face, for he tugged her fist close and covered it with his free hand, urging her to see reason, “You cannot win this struggle, Seraphina.  Your resistance is futile; surely you understand this?”  Harrison’s voice was silk persuasion, rich and dark and seductive—at complete odds with the very real threat he presented.  “I could easily break your wrist and prize your little weapon from your fingers—but I honestly have no desire to hurt you. Just let it go.”  And then, to her great surprise, he added, “Please.”
Blinking through the tears that fell against her will, tears that betrayed weakness when she wanted to be strong, Seraphina met his eyes again.  His beautiful, deadly eyes—and saw in them an unexpected sincerity that matched his gentle “please”.  She bowed her head and opened her fist, leaving her key and the can of mace to fall onto the passenger seat.
“There—that wasn’t so difficult after all, was it?”  Why was his voice so soothing?  Fear of what he might do to her next coursed through her veins, yet Seraphina thought she could easily crumple to the ground, curl up into a fetal ball, and let his voice see her into untroubled darkness.  The heat, the fear, the adrenaline, the struggle—all of it had sapped her of the will to face whatever might come next.  She’d always believed it wasn’t in her nature to fall apart so quickly, but she felt that way now, all the same.
True to his word, Harrison released her arm, but Seraphina remained in place, braced against the passenger side door, shaking in the aftermath and considering her very limited options. She might try to make it to her hovercraft, but the stranger now held her key; and even if she had the strength to run and the speed to outpace him, to flee into the desert at her back would be equally as brutal as anything he might do to her. She'd have to make her stand right here, then--and though she was no match for his size and strength, she knew enough to leave him hurting before he took her down for good.
Taking stock of her condition--mentally preparing to fight him off as best she could--Seraphina flexed her left wrist carefully, wincing as she explored her tender forearm with cautious fingers. Nothing broken at least, though she felt a bone-deep ache; but it would not be enough to hamper any effort to defend herself.
Strangely, Harrison was ignoring her at the moment; having retrieved her keychain, he had torn the can of mace free with no effort, before hurtling it carelessly into the desert. Seraphina had a vivid image of her own broken, half-naked body flung just as easily and left upon the sand for carrion-eaters to feast upon. She shoved the idea down deep, knowing such fear would only cripple her--and was immediately dumbfounded when he held the key out to her.
"Did I not say I have no wish to harm you?" Harrison's eyes bored into her own, searching for calm and reasoned understanding. "In spite of how it appears, we are equally vulnerable in this place and situation. We must find a way to trust one another. " Sera only continued to regard him warily. "Take this," he insisted, "If I judge you correctly, simple concern for a traveler in need motivated you to stop. And in keeping with your nature, I believe that you will not deny me the help that I need."
Sera studied his face, looking for signs of deception, skittish to trust him but accepting his peace offering nevertheless. "You lied," she said, defiant yet holding her anger at bay, "This car isn't yours..."
Harrison nodded, his full lips pressed together against a small placid smile, "I never claimed that it was..."
"It's stolen," she fumed, irritated with herself for allowing him to so easily mislead her when her first instinct had been correct after all.
"An act of desperation, I assure you..."
"Just as this was," she exclaimed, extending her bruised forearm to him, "I have to wonder what happens to people who truly stand in your way, Mr. Harrison. "
Unruffled by her outburst, Harrison closed his eyes a moment and breathed deeply. When he looked to her again, he was the picture of patience. "I swear I have no desire to cause you--or anyone else--harm. But you must understand, I am in dire straits and as we linger here, my family is in imminent danger." He paused, weighing the effect of his words upon her. "Such a thing will make a man act beyond the measures of polite society."
Seraphina narrowed her eyes, skeptical of his revelation of a family, but suspending her disbelief for the moment, "How then? What sort of danger is your family in?"
"Their very lives hang in the balance, threatened by a powerful man who seeks to manipulate me into working for him." Embers of hate flashed in his eyes, and he gave a bitter huff as he added, "Forcing me to work toward the most nefarious of purposes."
Sera shook her head, clearing the double vision that had crept up on her; she cupped a trembling hand against her forehead, which came away slick with perspiration. It was the heat getting to her, obviously. She felt parched, although the thought of putting anything into her roiling stomach left her feeling even more nauseous, and her head was pounding in time with her racing pulse. She needed to get out of the goddamn heat before she collapsed from heat exhaustion--while the man before her looked completely unaffected by the desert climate. "And...and I suppose this mysterious man is so powerful that you can't seek help from the proper authorities?" Sera leaned all her weight against the car door, wondering if Harrison had noticed her current state of distress.
If he did, he gave no sign of it, a mix of pain and rancor coloring his strikingly handsome features. "So powerful that it would be in your best interest to remain ignorant as to his identity and position." Anticipating her next question, he warned her, "Do not ask--for I cannot reveal that information."
Though stymied by his vague replies--and sensing a much more complicated tale behind what he'd already admitted to--Sera read blunt honesty in his voice and body language. And the fact that he had willingly returned her key while asking for--rather than demanding--her help, seemed a testament to some underlying truth. She realized that she likely had only a few more minutes until she passed out, leaving her completely at Harrison's mercy. "Then how...how did you end up here, stranded in the Mojave," Sera asked, panting softly, "How does any of this help your family?"
He was watching her closely now, so that he had to aware that she was fading fast. "That is a rather long and complicated tale, Seraphina." His voice had again taken on a lulling pitch. "One which I believe would outlast your capacity to remain on your feet."
She held on to the window frame, white-knuckled but determined to remain upright long enough to learn his hidden agenda. "I'm fine...I...I'm just a little light-headed..."
"Step aside now, Seraphina." Again, that tone of a man whose orders were obeyed without question. "You have little time left before you lose consciousness." His hand was already on the door handle, and she stumbled back in time for him to swing the door open.
Then he was looming over her, a tall, cooling shadow, reaching out to brace her. His touch this time was firm, while surprisingly gentle. "We need to get you out of this heat." Unexpected concern in is stunning eyes, calming concern in his voice. The man was a beautiful enigma.
"No...please...tell me. If...if you want me to trust you..." Her world was darkening around the edges, narrowing so that only his face remained in her field of vision. "If you want me to help...I need...I need to know..." Seraphina felt herself going, and as her consciousness fled, so did her fear and curiousity; only one need remained. She sobbed against him as he scooped her up into his arms, "But you promised...you promised not to hurt me again..." Her eyes fluttered shut as she slipped away from awareness.
Harrison strode swiftly towards her hovercraft, cradling her as softly as he could, knowing that the cool, dark interior was the quickest remedy at hand for what ailed her. "Oh, pretty little Seraphina," he murmured, brushing his lips against her dampened hair, inhaling the sweet scent of jasmine and honey, relishing how light and easy she felt in his arms. "Hurting you is the least likely thing I have planned."
(to be continued)
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If you enjoyed this, please reblog ~ it's the only way others can see this work.💟
tagging: @icytrickster17 @ironstrange1991 @strangelockd @groovy-lady @aphroditesdilemma @stewardofningishzida @battledress @mousedetective @dearmrsstephenstrange @lorelei-lee @mckiwi @shinebrightlikeafanbase @cumberbatchitis @doctorhelm @strangeflashholmes221 @prulock @stargirl-designs @hajile10 @dancingmushu @iloveavengersblog @fireonmybones @osugahunnyicedtea @brayleigh14
(There were a few more blogs that I tried to tag based on the response to chapter one, but tumblr's messed up url search function kept telling me 'no blog found'🤨)
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jokeringcutio · 4 months
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Reader x Stepdad William Afton (Drabble)
AN: You got me there, ANON. All right, here's a very QUICK drabble for you, because I COULDN'T RESIST. MATURE THEMES/NO EXPLICIT SMUT. Just a happy family dinner (well....)
Also, I am overwhelmed with prompt requests and I love them, so do keep 'em coming. But if you want to help me out for reaching my goal to save up to commission a celebratory piece of artwork for this tumblr (as we've almost reached 1000 mutuals following this account :3 ) please feel free to donate me a little something on Ko-fi ♡ ︎.
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based on this in my inbox: [ See Reaction to the post here x ]
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The clink of silverware against porcelain punctuated the silence, a staccato rhythm that seemed to echo in the cavern of your chest. Across from you, William’s hands were steady as he cut into his steak, but there was something about the tightness in his jaw, the way his blue eyes didn't quite meet yours, that whispered secrets.
"Sweetheart," your mother's voice sliced through the tension like the knife in William's hand through meat, "it's time we talked about a paternity test."
Your heart stuttered in your chest, a wild, frantic thing eager to escape. You swallowed hard, the mashed potatoes on your tongue now tasting like ash.
"Whoever the father is... he deserves to know," she continued, oblivious to the undercurrents swirling beneath her words.
"Of course," you agreed, the word brittle on your lips. Your gaze flickered unintentionally to William, then quickly away, fearing what might be revealed in a single glance.
He cleared his throat, a sound that rumbled deep and low, a prelude to the storm you knew brewed within him.
"It's only fair," he said, but his voice was a masterclass in control, every syllable measured, every intonation practiced.
"You can ring up the boys... see if they're willing." She was all practicality, all motherly concern, not an inkling of suspicion clouding her features. If only she knew…
"Right," you breathed out, the lie sour and heavy in your mouth.
In your bedroom, Evan's chest rose and fell with the innocent trust of sleep. Unaware. Untouched by the deceit that hung thick in the air. The door ajar, otherwise he wouldn’t sleep if he didn’t hear that you were near. As if somehow, your tiny son was aware that he had been born in a house full of dark secrets and possible danger.
Your fingers curled around your glass, the cool surface grounding you. Water, while your parents were drinking wine. Wasn’t your mom still trying for a baby? Had she finally given up now that she saw how it was to be between diapers and the soreness of giving milk?
William's gaze flitted toward the open door where your son lay oblivious to the grown-up games played at his expense.
"Will do it tomorrow," you promised, your voice a whisper of determination laced with dread.
"Good girl," your mother smiled, contentment lighting up her face. But in William's eyes, the reflection of a different kind of pride—a dark, devouring satisfaction—flickered and then died.
You pushed your plate away, appetite lost. While inside your thoughts careened like a runaway train, you tried to remain your compose. Look and act normal. But what would happen when the truth came out? What would happen when the masks fell away?
What would William do?
Because in all honesty, it wasn’t your mom and her feelings you were worried about the most any longer. She had proven time after time again to be there for you, no matter what lies had been told about you. Her two-goody-shoes daughter, suddenly a wild partying animal who had gone and get laid whilst drunk – even if she bought it she faithfully helped take care of you and your newborn son. She was so – so darn sweet! Like an angel sent from the blessed sky. If she’d forgiven you this, then you wouldn’t doubt she would forgive you the truth.
But…
Could you bear her disappointment? Right now? Could you see her so crestfallen and betrayed? Did you want to break that dam and wait whilst pain raked through you both – a pain that only time could mend?
Beside you, William scraped his throat, his thick fingers scraping past your thigh underneath the table. The horny beast. Even now he couldn’t stop touching you.
Shouldn’t he be working on one of his new robot animals? Like that yellow bunny suit he was making to resemble your favorite plushie? With the only difference that it was ten times bigger and build for him to wear?
You tried not to glance at your stepfather, not even when his fingers reassuringly squeezed your already bruised thigh. You gritted your teeth at the soreness – thanks to his latest bout of fucking, of course. The man took his chances whenever he could.
No, the real problem here was your stepfather. William was a tall, strong and dangerous man. His mind worked in ways that only left you guessing. And you had no doubt that he had hurt others in the past before to get exactly what he wanted.
If you wanted to play this game, you had to play it right.
Silently, you vowed to protect Evan from the shadows that lurked behind William's aviator glasses, from the manipulations that twisted beneath his agreeable facade. You would stand between your son and the man who wore danger like a second skin.
"Let's finish up here," your mother suggested, unaware of the battle lines being drawn right before her eyes.
"Indeed," William agreed, and his smile was a predator's grin, hidden in plain sight.
The baby slept on, his dreams untainted by the turmoil that swirled just beyond his reach.
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squirmhoney · 1 year
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Hello, can I request aemond x half sister (daughter of aemma and Viserys), Aemond was very attached to this sister, who always defended him and her father sent her to the Vale (with House Arryn), after the Driftmark incident, where she was against Rhaenyra and for Alicent.She returns to King's Landing at Vaemond's petition, and then Aemond knows he can't let her go again, so just some dub-con, with the dark obsessed Aemond with his childhood crush on his little sister.
Where you’re meant to be
A/N: this isn’t as dark as I initially planned it out to be. Very sorry for that. But I have been writing a lot of my stuff to be bit darker and felt like I needed a little bit less. Still read the warnings before hand and hope you like it. Also the reader is older which I hope is okay, I imagine them to only be three years apart max so just changing maybe the ages around of the characters so that Aemond is older and closer in age to reader. But is she is Aemma’s child she’d have to be older. Warnings: slight non-con. Dub con. Obsessed Aemond. Slight knife play (if you squint) Oral (f receiving). Smut. 18+ Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x Targaryen!Reader (sister) Word count: 2.4k
Master List
When the call to Kings Landing came, you were weary to take it. While you understood Vaemond's pleas for help to keep Driftmark and have it passed down to him, you didn't want to go against your sister. Not after what had happened at Driftmark all those years ago.
While you still believed in the moment defending your younger brother was the right thing, you had despised how things had been left with Rhaneyera. She was your older sister and you truly loved all of your siblings.
However, it was a chance for you finally to escape your confinements at the Vale. You would be glad to see your family again. You had been sent so many letters from your brother Aemond of all the changes in Kings Landing. He constantly sent you letters of how the family had changed, especially how he had changed.
Some of the letters were borderlining on inappropriate as he told you of how he longed to be with you, to touch you. How he even dreamt of you night after night, reaching out for you in his bed only to find that you were not there.
Never could you see your brother in that light. Instead you believed his sweet words just to be a reminder of how much he truly missed you. You had been so close growing up, it would only make sense.
Aemond wrote his letters as if they poured from the deepest part in his heart that only beated for you.
He was glad to hear the news of your return. He was so ecstatic at the thought, he found himself unable to sleep at night, pacing around his room thinking of the very moment he would see you again.
Eventually the day came but Aemond found it hard to see you. As soon as you arrived Vaemond was on you like a viper, convincing you to vouch for him in the throne room against your own sister. If not that, his father and mother trying to also persuade you on the matters. Aemond couldn’t care less on the situation, Driftmark didn’t matter to him. All he wanted was for everyone around to leave you alone.
It was a few days in before he finally was able to be with you alone without pestering voices constantly in your ear.
You had finally taken to your father’s chambers, hearing that he was up and in some sort of stable mind. You sat beside him, breaking down instantly as you cried into his chest. The weight of the world sat on your shoulders as you didn’t know which side to be on. You couldn’t tell your father the reason for your sadness, instead telling him you had just missed him all these years.
After Viserys fell asleep, you left the room to find Aemond stood by the door. His eye looked up from the floor as he unclenched his hands at the sight of you.
“Father has just gone to sleep,” you told him, gesturing towards the door.
“I wasn’t waiting for him,” he said, grinning down at you.
“I fear I have neglected you, little brother.” You stepped forward opening your arms as you pulled him gently in for a hug. He pulled you in tighter, pressing a kiss to the top of you head. “I have missed you, Aemond. I’m sorry I haven’t seen you since I’ve arrived there has just been a lot on my mind.”
“I’ve noticed,” he hummed, releasing you from his grip.
You looked down at the floor, your arms dropping to your sides as you played with your hands in distraction from your thoughts. “I thought seeing father would bring my spirits up but seeing him like-” your voice broke suddenly and you coughed trying to muffle your tears.
Aemond’s fingers reached below your chin, pulling your head up to look at him. He didn’t think as he pressed tender kisses to your puffy cheeks, only wanting to wipe the pain away from your face.
You hands lightly pushed him away as your hands touched his chest. His own hands held them there as he kept you close.
“Aemond,” you warned, pulling your face away to stop him. “Stop.”
“I’m only kissing your face, sweet sister,” he said, shrugging his shoulders. He furrowed his eyebrows placing the pretend confused facade on his face as he stared down at you. “Like I used to do when we were children.”
“But we are not children now,” you whispered, looking from side to side at any passers by. Only the guardsman, who didn’t dare watch you both, in sight. “These things aren’t appropriate anymore.”
“Let me take your mind off of things,” Aemond told you, placing his arm out for you to take. “If you’d like to make up for not neglecting your favourite sibiling.”
You shook your head as you grinned up at his words, taking his arm to follow him through the corridors.
“Aemond. Y/N,” a voice called from behind you.
You turned around seeing Alicent walking towards you. Her hand instantly clawing around your arm as she stopped next to you.
“I hope you don’t mind Aemond but I hoped to take Y/N for an hour or two before the evening,” Alicent said, pulling you towards her side.
Your whole body tensed but you grinned at Alicent, nodding your head. She practically dragged your body away from Aemond as she took you through the halls, not allowing him a second to protest.
Aemond’s chest tightened at the sight of you leaving him once again.
_
Nothing turned out the way you had expected at all. All you knew was that you were glad you didn’t have to take a side. However, you were deeply upset by the sight of Vaemond being killed and after the appalling sight of your last meal, you found yourself packing your belongings.
Maybe your father had made the right decision to send you to the Vale. Maybe marrying one of Jeyne Arryn’s sons wouldn’t be so bad, you thought.
“My love,” a voice called out to you in the dim room.
You jumped from the sudden sound, surprised to see Aemond’s figure by the open door.
“Aemond,” you gasped, placing a hand on your chest. “You frightened me.”
“What are you doing?” He questioned, noticing your stuff all over the place.
“I’m leaving,” you told him, pacing around your room once again. “I came here for what was asked of me and now I have to go back.”
“You’ve barely seen me,” he stated, grabbing your arm to halt your movements.
“You can come visit me in the Vale,” you tried reassuring him.
“No, you’re not going back,” he snapped, yanking your body close to him. “You’re not meant to be there. You should be here, where you belong.”
“My life is in The Vale now.” You gazed up at him, noticing the sadness and pain in his face. He instantly reminded you of the day that you had left all those years ago. How he had clung to your body in hopes you would stay. “Don’t look at me like that.”
“You’re not going,” he hissed, holding your face between his hands. “I won’t let you leave me again.”
His lips crashed down onto yours, hands holding your face in a harsh kiss. You were paralysed as you felt his lips work against yours feverishly until you snapped out of it biting down on his lip to stop him.
“Fuck,” he groaned, pulling away slightly from you.
“What are you doing?” You asked, furrowing your brows as you glared up at him. You put some distance between you, unsure of his next move.
Your eyes widened as he lunged forward again, making you both fall onto your bed as you scrambled away from him. He caught your ankle, dragging your body back towards him as he hovered over you. He pulled out his dagger from his side and at the sight of it you froze, being cautious.
The dagger traced along the open skin at your chest, slicing through your dress until Aemond was able to rip the rest apart with his hands.
“You do not want to leave me sister,” Aemond whispered, tutting at you. “You missed me so much or at least that was you told me so in your letters.”
Everything started making sense as you watched him slide a hand down your body. The letters of how he would express how much he missed you, how much he loved you, how much he needed you. It wasn’t brotherly love, no. It was something deep and dark, a desire that lurked in his eyes as he gazed down at your bareness in front of him.
“You’re not a liar now, are you sister?” Aemond questioned, face moving down to your chest.
Your nipples pebbled as his breath fanned across them, bringing his lips to suck on your skin as his hands groped at your tits. Your breath caught in your throat as you felt yourself become slightly damp at the feeling of Aemond touching you.
“I wou- wouldn’t lie to you,” you muttered, struggling to speak as he moulded his body into yours.
You could feel his bulge pressing down against your core, making you shiver in delight.
“So, why leave me?”
You couldn’t think of the answer as he rutted his hips into yours, the friction rubbing against you in a way you had never felt before.
“Aemond, this isn’t right,” you told him, hands gripping onto the sheets as he rubbed himself against you.
“But it feels so good,” Aemond hummed, sliding further down your body. “Doesn’t it?”
Every inch of your body told you this wasn’t right but when his hands squeezed the skin of your thighs, wrapping your knees over his shoulders, you felt yourself unable to fight it. His hungry eyes lit up as he looked between your legs, drinking up the sight of your wetness.
“Just relax.” His breath hit your core, making you gasp as your hole clenched around the air. It was desperate for some touch, practically begging for it as your core dripped with wetness.
Aemond gazed up at you before his face dove into your pussy, lapping at your clit instantly. You moaned bucking your hips up to his face.
“Aemond,” you whimpered, hand pushing you away from him. “We can’t, I can’t.”
He snapped your hips back towards him, holding your body down with his strength. His face dig deeper into your cunt, fingers now slipping into your entrance to cut off anymore protests from you.
Aemond ate you out like a starved man, enjoying the luscious taste your cunt provided. Never had you had a man touch you before and with the pleasure Aemond gave you, you’d be ruined for all men. Every movement from him built you towards an intense feeling and elicited noises you never knew could fall from your own lips.
“Aemo-” You cried, feeling your orgasm wash over you as Aemond continued his actions. The pleasure made you light headed, gazing down at Aemond in pure bliss as he slowed his actions.
He grinned up at you, lips covered in your juices as he started working at his clothes to strip them off. You couldn’t think as your legs still felt shaky from the orgasm, unable to think clearly as you just watched him.
His hands pressed your legs down onto your body, leaving your cunt bare for him as he crawled up your body. You could feel something sliding up and down your slit, coating itself in your juices. It prodded against your entrance and every time it nudged against your clit, you moaned.
“Aemond,” you whispered, slipping into a daze as he entered you slowly. The position with his weight over you left you completely vulnerable to him, even allowing him to completely bottom out into you. There was a slight pain as you felt the fullness of him being inside you, hissing as you gripped a hand around his bicep.
“It will feel better, I promise,” he reassured you, moving out of you slowly. He pressed all the way back in making you scream in slight pain and pleasure feeling every bit of him in your walls.
You found yourself grinding up onto him, enticing him to move faster into you. Aemond held onto your legs for support as he hit you deep and fast. You were unable to stop your moans as your walls clenched around him, wanting to hold him there for eternity.
“Aemond please,” you begged, needing your release again.
His fingers worked against your clit, rubbing harsh circles there sending you closer to the edge. “See how your walls wrap around me. See how we fit so perfectly together. You were meant for me.” You couldn’t deny him as your came again, only moaning his name as you felt you cunt grip him tightly.
He came soon after, cum spilling into your walls as he pounded into you relentlessly. He groaned into your ear as you felt him twitching inside of you, unable to shake the feeling that your cunt gave him. When he finally slowed down, your walls surely filled with seed, he fell on top of you and didn’t pull out from you.
He shifted his body from side to side, allowing your legs to fall beside you. His head rested beside yours on the sheets, his cock deep within you still as your walls hugged him comfortably.
“We shouldn’t have done that,” you told him, turning your head to look at him.
“It doesn’t matter,” Aemond told you, hovering his face over yours. He held you possessively close, not allowing for a second for you to move away from him. “You will stay here with me now.”
“I need to go back to the Va-” you words were caught in your throat as he snapped his hips into yours.
“You need to what?” Aemond taunted, allowing for you to open your mouth to protest before repeating his actions. “I’ll keep you so docile with pleasure that you will be unable to leave. If that doesn’t work, sweet sister, I’ll tie you to my bed.”
His words however didn’t make you scared or want to run away. You felt yourself able to relax in his presence as your arms wrapped around the back of his neck.
For the last few days you had only found pain and sorrow in the red keep but Aemond reminded you of the joy you once felt there. Something your mind wanted to slip into as you forgot about all that had happened, if only for a moment.
“I’ll stay.”
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drghostwrite · 10 months
Text
You’re Not Alone…
Okay so I was gonna wait to write the Natasha x reader but I saw a quote and it made me think of her so here it is
Quote: “she looked my demons in the eye and smiled, she fell for the very thing I thought she’d fear”
Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x reader
Summary: Natasha and Y/N fell for each other but what happens when your past comes back to haunt you, can she handle it or will it break what you worked so hard to build. Also sticking with the female super soldier storyline.
******************************************************** Your heart was beating fast, your breathing heavy, but you kept running. Every muscle in your body screamed for you to stop, to give up but you couldn’t, branches and thorns pulled at your clothing, ripping through your skin, the gash in your side oozed blood as you ran. You watched as bullets embedded in the trees around you sending wood splintering into your path, you ducked and then jumped a log continuing to run, you turned back seeing the lights coming and before you turned around you stepped over the ledge sending you tumbling down the hill, you laid at the bottom feeling the blood running, you willed your muscles to move to get up, anything, but they stayed put.
“Over here!” You heard one yell. You heard boots crunching the leaves and branches, you squinted as a light was shined in your eyes, one of the other female agents squatted down next to you.
“Oh sweetheart, you really thought you could get away, after Rogers and Barnes we know what to expect and love you might be twice as strong as them but we planned for that.” She held you by the collar of your jacket and studied the disdain and pain in your eyes. “Looks like the Huntress isn’t as good as she thought.” She chuckled and you let out a sob.
“Don’t worry love this won’t hurt too much, or maybe it will who knows.” You watched unflinching, unable to move as her fist came across your face, everything blacked out as she knocked you out cold.
You shot up into a sitting position on the bed the blankets falling around you, your grey ribbed tank showed off the cold sweats and your heavy breathing. You jumped as Natasha reached a hand up running it soothingly up and down your back.
“Baby, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing it was just a dream.”
“Another one?” She asked concerned, this wasn’t the first time you’ve woken up in a panic and most times it was the same dream, the female scientist from hydra and you weren’t ever able to escape.
Natasha sat up leaning on you, she wrapped an arm around your back and laid the other across you lap placing a kiss to your neck and then placing her chin on your shoulder. You sat there and sobbed, “Nat I can’t keep doing this.”
“Doing what baby?”
“The dreams, the sleepless nights, I need closure and you don’t deserve this, you deserve to be loved and spend your days being loved not here like this.”
“Y/N.”
“No you don’t deserve someone like me all this trauma I carry, you’ve had to go through enough on your own.”
“Y/N Romanoff, look at me,” she looked into your reddened eyes and tear stained face with a gentle forgiving smile, “if I ever would’ve second guessed your love for me or that this would work I never would’ve asked you to marry me, I knew I wasn’t just marrying the smart, witty, funny and drop dead gorgeous super soldier, I know a lot of what Bucky went through and even what I went through, I understood that there would be things there but never once did that scare me.”
You looked back into her eyes as she pulled you into a kiss her hand gently on your cheek, her thumb swiping away tears. “I want you to remember who put that ring on your finger.”
“Natasha,” you said leaning your forehead on hers and letting the tears fall. “What did I do to deserve a woman like you.”
“Baby, you deserve so much more than just me.” You pulled her into another kiss, there was nothing behind it no alterior motives, no cheesy or sexy intent, just love, pure love.
You laid back down and she wrapped herself around you, she made sure that you felt secure and that’s how you fell asleep laying in the arms of the woman you love.
You woke up in the morning to light leaking through the windows but Natasha wasnt sleeping next to you, you got up and did your morning routine and when you went to grab your coffee before heading out to train the recruits you found a note on to the coffee pot.
Hey beautiful good morning, I’m gonna be working with some of the recruits today but I was hoping that maybe we could meet in your office later around dinner.
You smiled and grabbed your things, after a tiring day you made your way down to your office, it was actually really spacious and you had it decorated, pictures of the avengers hung on the wall of you with various other friends (Wanda, Tony & Peter, Steve & Bucky), some classes of recruits that you helped train and there were a ton of pictures of you and Natasha with friends, or even the two of you, found around you desk. You heard a knock on you door and watched as your wife slipped in a case file tucked under her arm, you stood and greeted her with a quick kiss to the lips.
“So how’d today go?” You asked her, as you both sat down together on you couch, she propped her legs over your lap.
“Well these recruits were feeling testy today.”
“I’m sure you gave them hell though.”
“Oh you better believe it.” You both laughed, she never tolerated disrespect especially if it was someone inexperienced and that didn’t know what they were doing.
“I also did some digging.”she motioned to the case file she had.
“Oh?” She handed you the file and you accepted flipping open the first page, you stopped breathing a knot forming in your throat, you looked at the picture clipped on the front page, it was the female hydra scientist from your dream.
“Natasha, what is this?”you looked at her for an explanation.
“I went back through some old case files from hydra and found this, your name is mentioned or at least your alias of the huntress. Turns out that is doctor Quinn Alexander she was known for engineering and even won awards, after she went missing though and turns out she’s the one who created your formula, the first person to make a female super soldier, she made you twice as strong as Steve and Bucky essentially making you a super, super soldier. Her research showed that her main purpose was to see if she could A. Create you and B. To see if she could breed you with another soldier creating a superhuman race, but it didn’t work because Bucky escaped and then she was killed... I thought you might need some more closure so it’s all right there in that file whether you want it or not.”
“Nat thank you, thank you so much, you have no idea what this means to me.”
“Baby I know exactly what this means, I didn’t have someone to do that for me and I had to go through it alone. But you’re not alone, I’m here to help you fight these demons even if that means sleepless nights.”
Tears rolled down both of your cheeks and you leaned forward kissing her, that was the moment you knew you made the right choice you had married the right one. She was never going to let you fight alone and you will do the same for her.
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squishycheekanon · 6 months
Text
SoftDark! Slasher!Techno
Prompt: You ask a stranger to pretend to be your boyfriend to get rid of your ex.
Warnings: violence, stalking, unhinged Techno, 6’6 Techno, blood, murder,
You hadn’t wanted to go out, that much was clear to your best friend, Mia, when she had pestered you non stop only to have you brush her off each time with a huff and a ‘no’. Though she was very persistant, it was Halloween, she had whined. This coming from the woman that went out every year for Halloween, you however didn’t, you’d been out a few times for it but the last few years it had just seemed so trivial.
“You know just because you keep nagging me about it doesn’t mean I’m gonna change my mind.” You groaned trying your hardest to keep your temper at neutral.
“Please! I promise I won’t ever ask you to go out with me again!” She pressed, eyes wide with hope, it made you deflate a little. You knew you were giving in.
A pregnant pause sounded throughout the room before you conceded, “fine.” She squealed loudly and began bouncing around the room going on about what costumes to wear, it made you laugh.
About an hour later when she’d finally finished and calmed down you’d pushed her out your cabin, she stood her ground only leaving when you promised to meet her for hot cocoa the next day to discuss costumes and makeup. Only when you agreed did she leave letting you breath a sigh of relief as you watched her walk down the footpath leading into the woods that surrounded your quaint little home.
Living far away from society wasn’t exactly your choice to begin with, and even with many many protests from Mia, the place had begun to grow on you. As did the routine, getting up early, chopping up firewood as best you could, foraging and exploring the woods around your home so much so you had mapped them out.
You were confident you knew these woods better than anyone else.
After Mia had disappeared from your sight you’d closed your door and locked it. A main lock, and several little ones as well as a big wooden plank that slotted on two hooks. Impossible for anyone to break in. You repeated the actions with the backdoor and the windows, only feeling at ease when all of the entrances were locked up tight.
You’d been in this self assigned isolation for so long this was normal now, the feelings of anxiety and fear only leaving when everything was secure. No one would be getting in, especially not your ex. The man you were hiding from. The reason for your isolation. A disgusting being.
He’d put you through so much and when you’d finally escaped he came after you again, never wanting to let you go. He’d marked you in his eyes and he wasn’t going to let what he thought was his just leave. So here you were four years later hiding.
Mia had assured you that the police were doing everything in their power to find him and that it was safe to return to society but you knew better. He was smart, they’d never catch him. You’d live like this for the rest of your life, alone.
It wasn’t all bad, you were able to do pretty much whatever you wanted. With the big inheritance that your now gone family had left you, you had no need for a job. Money wasn’t a worry for you which was good.
You were able to buy food, and enough things to furnish your house in exactly the way you had wanted. You had enough clothes, even though there weren’t a lot of them, you still had everything you needed.
Most days you read or baked just like today, to keep your mind off the darkening sky you focused on your cookies and cakes that were baking away nicely while you stirred the home made jam.
You mind was numb as you watched an old movie on the IPad Mia had gotten you a couple Christmas’s ago. Crawling into bed with the lamp still on, you fell asleep with somewhat ease of knowing your hand was wrapped around the handle of your gun under your pillow. Just in case.
-
“Oh Nachzehrer where are you?” He hummed with a sing-song tone, thick boots and heavy footsteps pounded on the floor with each step. All he heard was a snort in reply, one that made the corners of his lips twitch with a smile under his mask.
“Shut up!” He spat when the man he carried groaned, “You were so loud and now you insist on making more noise? How selfish can you be?!” He snarled before dropping the man on the floor grimacing as the poor guy let out a scream.
“Nachzehrer! Dinner.”
-
You’d wrapped up warm today and good thing too as the cold air blew into your face making you snuggle into your red scarf. Looking both ways you crossed the street from the edge of the woods to the start of town, Bludhaven.
Sighing as you wandered through the street passing all the shops, only stopping when you reached The Bludhaven Grill. Stepping inside you scanned the room until your eyes landed on Mia, her bright green eyes flitting over the menu. Her dark purple hair pulled up into a messy bun, she always died her hair for Halloween.
The thought made you remember all the different colours she died her hair, every colour from the rainbow and more. A crazy hair colour for October and then November first she’s back to brown hair like it never happened.
“Hey!” You jumped slightly when Mia shouted your way, you shrunk away from the attention of the other people in the restaurant and made your way over. A quick hug later and you were pulling off your black coat and scarf, hanging them on the back of your seat before pulling off your black leather gloves too.
“I already ordered the coco,” Mia smiled brightly, “want any food?” She asked looking over the menu again.
“No thanks i ate a little while ago.” You replied starting to feel a little jittery, the way you always felt when you left the safety of your home. She nodded and continued to read through the food options.
“Oh how’s your sister by the way? I keep forgetting to ask, any news from her?” Mia asks not looking away from the menu.
“I don’t know actually I haven’t heard from her in a while but I guess you don’t have a lot of time to write when you’re in the military.” You answered, you missed your sister dearly.
“Where was she stationed again?” Mia asked this time her eyes meeting yours.
“France? Or Germany…. You know I’m not too sure actually.“ Mia just nodded deciding to drop it seeing how you began to look sad talking about it.
You shook your head to get rid of the current thoughts, glancing around the restaurant for anything out of the ordinary but you couldn’t see anything and you tried to repeat that over and over again in your head to make you relax. Obviously it didn’t work, you practically jumped out of your skin when the waiter placed your steaming hot coco in front of you.
The man looked at you weird before walking away, “Are you okay?” Mia asked concern lacing her voice, the emotion present on her face too.
“Yeah,” you said almost trying to convince yourself more than her, “yeah I’m a….I’m fine.” She looked unconvinced and made that very apparent by how her face contorted as if to say ‘seriously?’. You were quick to try and change the subject, “What costume did you decide on?”
Thankfully the question was enough to get her off your back, “oh! I decided on slutty witch.” She giggled.
“How original.” You scoffed with a playfulness to it.
“And what are you gonna wear huh?” She crossed her arms in fake annoyance.
“I haven’t particularly thought about it, it’s been quite a while since I’ve been out.” The two of you continued your chit chat and playful banter, concluding that Mia would pick your outfit and you’d just have to wear it. Definitely risky considering Mia’s style was very different than yours but you couldn’t think of a good enough excuse to say no.
Your coco finished, keeping you warm and starting to make you sleepy Mia offered to drive you home to which you accepted. She quickly ran to the bathroom leaving you to sit and think. That was bad, you took deep calming breathes to settle your anxiety. It just got worse, you picked up your coat pulling it on as well as your scarf all in a hurry to make it outside for some fresh air you crashed into someone.
Someone. A wall. A freakin mountain.
You fought every nerve in your body not to gape at the man standing in front of you. His size was astonishing, must be at least 6’6 in height. At least. His face was stoic, never changing even as his eyes darted around your face with pure curiosity. His facial expression never changed.
His hair was longish, coming to a stop at his sharp jawline. His face looked at little rough, but it matched the rest of him. His huge muscles melded with the black t-shirt he wore, you could see how thick his legs were almost begging to burst out of the dark blue jeans he was wearing.
“Sorry I wasn’t looking where I was going.” You apologised, trying your hardest not to stutter under his piercing gaze. All he did was nod, hands moving so they were sat in the front pockets of his jeans.
“Let’s go man.” Another guy who look so similar to him but his hair was longer and tied back in a low bun. He was a little bit taller, but wasn’t as muscular and big. He had a bit of pudge on him as well. Though if you didn’t know any better you’d call them, not twins, but definitely brothers. The man’s accent seemed foreign, French maybe?
Once again the giant nodded following his friend out of the grill, his eyes only leaving your figure when he had to walk out the door. You were frozen in place staring at where he last was.
“Who was that?” You almost screamed at the sound of her voice.
“Jeez Mia!” Placing your hand over your heart in fright, “we need to get you a bell.” You breathed listening to her laugh. Her question forgotten about, though as you walked out of the grill together and made it to her car you did wonder, who was that?
-
“So where are we going? To a bar? A party? Trick or treating?” You ask as Mia adds the last bit of mascara onto your eyelashes before pulling back admiring her work with a happy nod.
“We’re going to a festival in town. It’s only small but I’m pretty sure the whole town will be there.” She answers but notices the panic that covers your face, “hey, hey it’s okay. Relax. There’s music, a bar, there’s even a fair with apple bobbing and a ring toss. It’ll be fun.” She smiles softly her green eyes sparkling with care.
“That’s not like you. Usually you go to parties.” You said watching in the mirror as she shrugs then goes to tighten your extremely dark green corset, it was almost black. Delicate flower patters in a slightly lighter green graced the corset that sat snug over your creamed coloured blouse. The red skirt you had on reached the floor, covering your black tights and brown laced up riding boots. Little red riding hood, and not the slutty version. You were very pleased with Mia’s choice.
“I didn’t want your first time out in years to be some shitty party. We’ll actually have fun at this. Plus you can leave whenever you want, I’ll even come with you.” You quickly pull Mia into a tight hug one she accepts just a swiftly.
“Thank you.” You mutter so grateful to have Mia in your life. She squeezes you a little tighter, you stay like this for a while until you decide to stop being sappy and go have some fun for the first time in so long.
Mia drove the two of you into town and by the looks of the streets, the festival is already in full swing. The streetlights shining down on all the people dancing and smiling, everyone seemed to be having fun. Mia parked and the two of you made your way through the crowd of scary and slutty, even some funny costumes until you found yourself standing outside some barn.
It had been fully decked out in Halloween decorations and pretty lights. Surrounding the barn was the fair, to the left was a stage, some band rocking out on it with loads of people surrounding it singing along to some song you didn’t know. A slight breeze makes shiver, you pull the red velvet cloak tighter around you for warmth.
“Hey I’m gonna grab us some drinks.” Mia purrs staring the hot bartender down, it makes you laugh as you push her towards the bar inside the barn. There’s so many people inside and out you loose her in the sea of people but for once you don’t freak out. You just admire your surroundings, happy to be out of your cabin, it felt nice.
But all good things come to an end.
“Long time no see sweetie.” David grinned viciously leaving a sickening feeling to swirl around you. “Boy have I been waiting for this moment.” He reaches out for you and you fall back into the crowed to get away from him. Your feet move before your brain can register and you’re so glad as you begin running and screaming.
“Please help!” You screeched as loudly as you could trying to get people to hear you over the booming music. No one did, until you crashed into someone. Again. His face was covered by a mask of some kind, it looked like the skull of a pig, the tusks still intact. Soulless dark eyes glared at you through the eyes holes, but you recognised the giant. You’d never seen anyone as big as him before, there’s no way you’d forget him.
“You.” Your voice held uncertainty and surprise but Techno focused on the fear evident in your eyes, screaming at him. He recognised it so easily. Pulling off his mask to get a better look, although the fear you displayed didn’t bring him the dopamine rush as it usually did.
“Please!” You grab onto his boiler suit outfit so tight and with such desperation that the voices in his head go quiet. “Help me! Please!” You plead eyes burning with the threat of tears, but he nods and instantly you breath a sigh of relief, “my ex is here, he is dangerous and looking for me. Please, I…I,” you scrambled for way he could help, when the idea popped into your head, “pretend to be my boyfriend.”
Techno tilts his head slightly, face unchanged from the first time you’d met, from when you’d just bumped into him. With an uncertainty in his movements he hooks an arm around your waist pulling your body against his hulking form. The air twitches with power, that’s what you felt in the force he tugged you forward. Unbridled power just emanating from him. You felt so tiny staring up at him towering over you, eyes staring into your soul yet face still stoic.
“What the fuck!” The yell is one your familiar with in the worst ways, it makes your body tremble, makes you grip onto Techno’s Michael Myers costume tighter. Techno notices and find himself frowning, finds himself not liking it one. God. Damn. Bit.
The voices in his head begin ranting and raving the second he takes his eyes off you and they land on what he could only describe as a pathetic excuse for a man. But that way you shake against him, he could see how such a man could make a little thing like you cower in fear.
“Get off her!” Your ex, David, growled his shoulders squared ready for a fight even as he glared up at the absolute beast of a man that currently held you in his arms.
“Okay.” Techno agreed. You panicked, your heartbeat rising, breathing picking up. That’s what you get for asking a stranger for help. A panic attack back on the rise you released your grip on Techno’s outfit and began to back away from him. He watched you still a frown on his face, the first bit of emotion you’d seen him display.
That was until he turned to his left, facing your ex who had his eyes on you with a hunger that made you stomach churn in disgust. Techno’s eyes light up as he rolled his shoulders, his arm moving back before he swung it and punched your ex right in the face.
He fell to the floor like a sack of potatoes. Techno glanced at you, his rubies looking you up and down with a flicker of concern? Maybe? Before he leaned down grabbing David’s wrist and dragged him away.
You stood there dumbfounded, what had just happened? And where was he taking him? You didn’t understand, but you were going to. Searching the room you spotted Mia seeing her making out with the hot bartender. She was okay, that gave you the green light to rush out of the barn. The whole world felt like it was swirling and spinning as you looked for a giant dragging a man with him.
There! Your eyes widened as you watched him disappear into the woods, and then the stupid kicked in and you sprinted after them. The further you got into the woods the quicker you started to realise just how idiotic this really was.
You didn’t know this man, he was a stranger and yes he may have saved you but right now he was dragging your ex along the dirt floor like he was nothing. You didn’t like where this was going and you sure as hell didn’t want to see how it ended. Turning around you realised that you were in the middle of nowhere, no festival in sight.
“Shit.” You cursed under your breath turning back to see that the giant and your ex had disappeared too. Now you were alone, lost in the middle of the woods.
“Okay okay you can do this, you know the woods it’s just darker.” You coaxed yourself, you needed to stay calm and collected. Easy right?
“Help!” Wrong. The ear shattering scream of what you thought was your ex sprouted a new level of fear inside of you.
You followed the desperate cries until you saw something out of a horror movie the absolute beast of a man was holding your ex down while he cut him open. It reminded you of when you had to dissect a frog in science, the very same technique.
Your ex cried and screamed for him to stop only for Techno to tut and reply with shut up. The scene before you had your stomach churning, you felt absolutely sickened to your core. Watching the man who had brought you so much pain writhe on the dirty ground, it wasn’t what you thought you’d feel.
Maybe you’d feel justice? Happy? Relieved? No, you felt sick as your eyes followed the way his guts spewed out from his stomach. Holding your hand over your mouth as to not make a sound, you sought strength from the tree a little ahead of you. Stepping forward, all you wanted was to grip onto the tree, all you wanted was some support, instead, a snapping noise emanated around you.
You’d stepped on a twig. You knew it and looking up into the dark dangerous eyes of the giant, he knew it too.
You wondered in that moment where the gentle giant who was kind enough to protect you had disappeared to. He looked hungry and murderous, like killing once had ignited the fire in him. “Run kleines Lamm, this lions hungry.”
“Shit!” You screeched as he advanced towards you, you ran as fast as you could. You left your brain behind and ran, no thoughts entered your head. All you knew was that you had to keep running and ignore the thundering footsteps behind you, it felt like they were shaking the whole forest.
You looked back for a split second and saw him slowing down, it pushed you to move faster knowing the advantage this gave you. You made your body go and when you thought you couldn’t move anymore you kept going. This was quite literally life or death and despite the fact that you were sure you’d be the first to die in any horror movie, you were not dying today.
Glancing back once more was a mistake given that you tripped and landed on your ankle funny, a cut on your knee and both of your hands were grazed. Hearing him closing in on you, you manage to pull yourself behind a tree. The massive trunk kept you out of site while you looked over your leg with a small hiss escaping your mouth.
You quickly covered your mouth with both hands, trying to ignore the blood that was dripping from the cut in your knee, you peeked out from behind the tree to see him stood quite far away, his eyes searching the forest through that pig skull mask of his.
You were, officially, screwed.
“You shouldn’t have followed me kleines Lamm. I don’t want to hurt you.” The words felt fuzzy and wrong coming out of his mouth, “You really should have stayed at the festival.” Shivers racked through your body at his words and the murderous tone he was so desperately trying to soften.
“Oh Nachzehrer where are you?” Techno hummed with a sing-song tone. You heard a snort in reply, and if you thought that the giant’s footsteps were loud, these were booming. Peeking back out you spotted what looked to be a massive warthog, his body three times the size of a regular one. He was vicious, with blood all round his mouth and tusks.
You were so entranced with the warthog, so terrified by its presence that you missed it. You should of been smarter, you should of fought harder. But in the end the bad guy always wins.
“Hello kleines Lamm.” Was the last thing you heard before it all went black.
-
Your head was pounding, it felt like your brain was trying to claw its was out of your skull. With blurry vision you looked at your surroundings, instantly noticing the gigantic warthog laid in the corner of the room chewing on a bone. You couldn’t react, you were absolutely gone…
Delta India delta, Yankee Oscar uniform, golf echo tango, tango hotel echo, hotel Oscar November echo Yankee Charlie Oscar Mike echo, Romeo echo Charlie India papa echo?
You were so drowsy, so out of it, so delirious it the words you thought you heard made no sense…
“India, hotel alpha victor echo, hotel echo Romeo”
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diaboliklove · 3 months
Text
modern day au where yui cannot catch a break, and things only get worse when her house gets broken into by an angry red headed robber — but instead of taking her things, he takes her heart
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yui was having the worst year of her life.
even worse than in 2013 when her father wouldn’t let her go to that taylor swift concert since it was deemed ‘unholy.’
she really thought only taylor could understand her.
but now its 2024, and she’s begun to have adult problems. she’s broke, her heater is broken, her apartment has started to fall apart, she stained her favorite pink skirt with coffee, her phone screen shattered when she dropped it on the train, she ran out of her favorite lip gloss, college bills keep stacking up, her upstairs neighbors never stop engaging in fornication, strawberries are out of season so she can no longer afford them and most importantly —
her father just passed away.
and all she wanted now was to rot in her apartment and ask god for mercy on her poor heart.
“it’ll be okay,” she sniffled back a tear. “father used to say the lord puts us through trials to test our faith.”
yeah, used to.
it was now late night, coming back from her fathers funeral she felt more empty than when she first got the news. her feet hurt from the black heels she now had to walk home in, the black dress did little to give her warmth, her cheeks were numb from the cold weather and having to comfort people with a smile that she’ll be okay, that there was nothing to worry about.
… but yui was already worrying about dinner. also how she’d have to shiver herself to sleep again. she couldn’t allow herself to cry herself to sleep again, her face would be frozen when she woke up, and what if she finds another hole in the walls? tape didn’t work last time, and she’s running out of rags to stuff in between them. and what about her job? she can’t buy more rags without it. they granted her a leave of absence due to her fathers passing, but what if they replaced her? if she lost her job she couldn’t pay rent — and she couldn’t ask for another extension on rent, her landlord was fed up enough with her pleading, she wouldn’t get lucky again. and also —
“no, lets just take it one day at a time. thats right,” she neared the steps to her apartment. “deep breath in, and then out. lets have some canned soup for dinner, and then pair it with rewatching the kardashians. yeah. thats a great plan.”
she turned the corner to her door.
“everything will get better,”
she put the key in the lock.
“as long as i stay positive.”
and she swung her door open —
“shit!”
“AH!”
— right into a mans back.
at first she thought she opened the wrong door. but the faint smell of her candles hit her nose, and her eyes fell on the very TV she watched shitty TV on in the mans arms — and then her eyes landed on a fucking sword on his waist.
her eyes followed it as he dropped her TV from his arms, and unsheathed it from his waist —
— and directed it right in between her eyes.
“empty your fucking purse! ill fucking kill you!”
Oh wow. wooooow.
now you would think the right action would be to do as he said. anyone would listen to a manic man with hair as red as blood, especially when they pointed a sword at you that looked like it came from the 1800’s. its not like yui wanted to die, so maybe she should save her life and sacrifice her beloved tv and the few pennies she had in her wallet.
but instead. her face twisted, and yui broke out in the most ugly open mouthed sob she’s ever done.
it wasn’t out of fear. it didn’t even register how this man genuinely had bloodlust leaking out of him. it was out of absolute frustration and sadness that this was becoming her life — and that she couldn’t even have her dream of watching the kardashians.
she fell to her knees. because, seriously, what the hell did she do to deserve all of this? she was a good kid. never acted out to her father and attended mass even when she had the flu. she never wished bad on anyone. but why does everything always have to end bad? on her 11th birthday her goldfish frank died, when she wanted a coffee last week, her card declined and now she couldn’t even sob into her blankets while she heard kim talking about how rich she was. can’t she have one good day? can’t she —
“holy shit, are you crying?” the red haired man didn’t even move.
yui looked up to him, and just stared at the man’s flabbergasted expression. through her tears, she tried to inhale through her nose, but it came out in little stutters. she extended her purse towards him.
“take it. take everything if you want.” yui spoke through her sobs. its not like anything she really wanted was here anymore.
yui curled up into her knees and rocked herself, continuing to cry hysterically at the thought of just her life. she wouldn’t mind if that man stole everything in her house — material objects could be replaced… eventually. when her eyes started to burn by the amount of tears flooding out, she noticed she couldn’t hear the familiar floorboards creak from movement and her purse was still in her hands. lifting her head to see what was going on, she noticed that the man hadn’t moved from his spot, and just was gawking at her sitting on the floor. they held eye contact for a while, like they were both afraid to move.
sure, yui thought he was a manic. but he probably thought yui was a suicidal manic.
while she held eye contact, she finally really looked at him.
he was fit. wearing a black shirt and a ripped jean jacket, yui could tell he wasn’t bulky, but instead quite lean. his pecs were defined and his muscular abdomen and biceps were flexed against the fabric from welding the heavy sword. his joggers looked worn down, and black nikes seemed like they seen better days. his face was … nice. well sculpted and he had a well defined jaw. his lips were plump and chapped from the chill outside.
what threw yui off was the cacophony that was his hair and eye color. bright firetruck red for hair that looked like he hadn’t brushed it in days, and green eyes fit for only a predator. regardless of the situation, yui could tell he honestly was… beautiful. dangerous. probably looked more attractive if he didn’t have his mouth wide open in awe.
his eyebrows furrowed, and he closed his mouth. he placed his sword back in his sheath, and leaned down to grab the tv from the floor. he looked towards yui again, with a face she could only describe as disappointment. clicking his tongue, he began to drag the tv … not towards the door but towards the tv cabinet.
“this isn’t fun anymore. you can have your shitty shit back.”
placing the tv back in its rightful throne, he squatted down and went through a worn down black backpack — that had some random pins of a band she never heard of — that was on the floor. within it, he took out her favorite necklace, her jewelry box, a couple of her wool sweaters and her damn smart toaster she picked up extra shifts for.
“this is yours. ill be back when you’re mentally stable, you deranged bitch.” he motioned to the items on the floor.
“really?”
the robber rolled his eyes. “of course I will be! do you know how much your toaster —“
“— no i mean. you’ll give it back?”
“you want me to take it?”
“well… i’d like it if you didn’t.”
“then! shut the fuck up.”
he grabbed his backpack and swung it around his shoulder. he started making his way towards the door right beside yui. as he took two steps past her, he paused.
“you’re really broke, you know.”
yui sniffled. “i know.”
“like, broke broke. i don’t think ive ever broke into a house that had so much of nothing. what are you, a level one sim? do you have no hobbies? do you even eat? i see nothing to even munch on here.”
“… i have soup.”
“you literally have two cans of spaghetti-os and tomato soup.”
yui sniffled louder. “i know.”
things were silent for a while. yui was sure the robber was still there, probably reconsidering his decision. she expected him to march back in to take her things again while flipping her off. this entire situation seemed too good to be true… but maybe this could end with her losing nothing... no. she wouldn’t let herself hope for something that was next to impossible in a situation like this.
but something even more unlikely happened.
the robber spoke again.
“do you like dennys?”
“w…what?” yui turned her head towards him.
“dennys. the best restaurant in the world. do you like it?” his face stayed neutral, but somehow the question felt like a threat.
yui feared the honest answer, ‘ive never been’ would end in her getting decapitated. so, she said, “i do.”
“do you want to go get some pancakes?”
it was yuis turn to gawk at him. he looked bored, and slid his hands in his pockets. now, maybe a normal person would say ‘fuck no, its 10pm and you just broke into my home somehow and then tried to steal my beloved tv and lovely toaster then pointed a fucking sword at me… also, i don’t even know your name you creep.’
but yui wasn’t a normal person experiencing normal things right now.
“pancakes sound nice.”
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aka, the alternative universe in which two cold hearts find warmth within each other.
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