#she spent all the live talking about 'oliver's episode' and then it hit them that monday is 6x10 and not 6x11 | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

himbo-buckley · 4 years

Text

Intimacy, Sex and Buddie (better known as I have a lot of feelings about this show, some of which are related to the before mentioned topics)

I should preface this by saying this meta was supposed to be a lot shorter and only talk about how both Buck and Eddie use sex to distract their respective partners from whatever topic they actually wanted to talk about but since I decided to rewatch the show to make sure I don’t miss any such scenes, it has exploded a bit and taken on more topics

I should also preface this by saying that the whole of the 118 has some obvious intimacy / commitment issues except Bobby (which is sort of surprising) but *John Mulaney voice* we don’t have time to unpack all of that!

On another note I cuss a little in this Meta because my parents let me listen to TicTacToe as a small child and after that it never stuck that cussing is wrong so, uhm, parental supervision is advised or something?

This Meta will so far have three parts, one for each season and is organised by episode so you could technically follow along

Without further ado I present: Intimacy, Sex and the Buddie of it all, Season 1: (Better known as “Not a Sex Addict”)

Episode 1.01:

Buck, we meet first in the pilot and one of the first things we learn about him? That boy fucks! Like literally his second scene is him having sex in the firetruck, which in the episode is presented to us as his way of dealing with the stress of firefighting (it cuts from Bobby’s confession scene saying some firefighters are sex addicts to Buck racing the Brunette). Then later in this episode, between saving a baby, getting in a fight with Athena and not knowing who Rambo is, he fucks the snake horder and get’s himself fired for his trouble. He also tells Bobby he is a sex addict here.

Now you could easily read both those scenes as proving Buck’s statement or you can read it as him justifying his actions, which I think is what Bobby did, or you can fall in love with the cocky bastard and think there is more to it, which is obviously what I did. And also what I think this show wants you to do? Because in the same scene Buck gives the first of his many heartbreaking speeches about having nothing else besides being a firefighter and how that is the best part of him (or whatever, I’m combining the speeches, I didn’t rewatch that scene because it gives me too much second hand embaressment)

And let’s look at this statement and what we know about Buck by fast forwarding a bit, okay? Because we know virtually nothing about who Buck was prior to the Pilot. We know he spent a summer in South America as a bartender, we know he tried out for the Seals about a year ago and we know he’s been a firefighter for 3 months (meaning the first season is his probationary time the same way Season 2 is Eddie’s), so depending on how long firefighter training takes he probably has lived in LA for less than a year, meaning he probably hasn’t made too many meaningful connections yet and the 118 are really the closest thing to family he has there (a fact that if you fast forward again is sort of proven in canon if - if we take every word as being word of god - by Maddie saying „If our parents call“ in 2.01, implying Buck is probably not close to them) (he also tells Maddie „It was getting pretty lonely here“ in 2.01, so you know, point proven?)

Now I don’t think Buck is a sex addict after all. Yes, he is using sex to unwind (and good for him, at least he isn’t drinking or taking drugs, Bobby), but he is also using it to substitute actual intimacy, because that boy is fucking lonely.

Just look at the scene with the brunette, alright? After the act he asks her: „So can I have your actual number?“ and she says no, and he does this whole macho spiel about „the golden times“ or whatever, but come on, we know this is bull, right? Look at how earnest he looks when he asks! (and here I have to applaud 911 again, because the show only has one young conventionally attractive character at this point and instead of his character just being badass ladies man, but he is held accountable for his actions and the show went out of its way to point out how problematic his behaviour was, so kudos! I love you!)

Episode 1.02:

In this episode Buck loses two people and is understandably distraught. And Bobby comes to him in the locker room, to, as Buck thinks, express his disappointment, which is what Buck thinks he deserves, except Bobby is in full Dad-mode and just wants Buck to talk about it. Which Buck does almost imediately leading to us learning about the Seals and that our Buck has so many emotions and knows it and likes it (again, shoutout to the writers for having their young attractive Macho-dude cry in episode two! Ya’ll the real ones).

Now Bobby clearly didn’t see this coming and is like „Uhm, how about we talk to a professional about all that, I have my own shit, kiddo“ and then we get our first therapist scenes and look, while I do see where people are coming from, I do not consider this rape. I do however think it was a badly thought through scene and also an abuse of power and Autumn Reeser should not be allowed to work as a therapist again. The way this scene is shot and cut however makes it seem like Buck came onto her and did not regret what happened, so you know as the german saying goes: where there is no complaint there is no judge. (which does not mean I condone what happened, but, tbh, this is one of those scene where I feel the writers just did not think the implications through. Someone with a twitter go ask Tim Minear about it)

Anyways, let’s talk about everything before the sex because I think this is what’s relevant:

The scene begins with the therapist asking Buck if he is uncomfortable, he seems that way (and kudos to Oliver Stark for the way he acts this scene because we can truly feel everything Buck feels) and Buck saying his „I’m not really into feelings. I mean yeah feeling them, just not talking about them.“ after which the therapist throws some things at Buck to see what sticks (which is something therapists sometimes do in early sessions, just try to gauge a reaction, see where the no no - zones are, especially with people like Buck who are quote „not scared“. Like, he is so walled up already.)

And now comes the part that I’ll give you word for word, because this is what matters in this scene, okay?

T: „You lost somebody, that’s hard“

B: „Yeah but we lose people. At least that’s what everybody keeps telling me.“

T: „Was this your first time?“

B: „Well, I’ve had calls where it’s been to late but I’ve only been doing this not even 6 months. Now I just can’t shake the feeling that this one didn’t need to go down the way it did.“ (up until the second part Buck sits tall, then he leans forward, his voice becomes urgent, THIS is the important message)

T: “So do you think there is something you could have done differently?“

(close up to Bucks face looking distraught, ding ding, we have a winner!)

After this they cut away to Athena and when we come back Buck is crying and the therapist tries to explain why the guy might have died and then walks toward Buck and tells him how they’re actually here to talk about him and then Buck deflects, he tells her to call him Buck, they talk about facebook, scene change, they come back after Sex, Buck is all better.

(Slightly unrelated sidenote at this point we have seen Buck have sex 3 times and every single time it’s sitting on some chair with the girl on top, uhm, what’s up with that? (He’s a bottom))

But I truly think the important part is what I’ve highlighted, this is where she hit a nerve and sure, he let her finish and listened and cried, but Buck’s a multitasker, he was just waiting for his opening - which the therapist gave to him by sitting down across from him and touching him, so now Buck turns the tables on her and makes her uncomfortable - or: she struck a nerve and he deflects, so instead of the emotional vulnerability she wants from him, he gives her physical intimacy, probably aware that this way he will not have to come see her again (because isn’t that what all women do? Hi, Brunette from Episode 1).

And then the episode ends on the very relevant conversation were Abby asks him out and Buck says no because HE REALISED HE HAS SOME ISSUES WITH WOMEN AND INTIMACY!!! I love this show so much, you guys! Buck tells Abby he can’t go out with her because they’ll definitly have sex and he tells her about the therapist and Abby is all you wish and he tells her how much he likes her and how he has no one else in his life that make him feel good and it’s all cute and dorky and yes, sometimes I do find myself shipping them. A little.

Episode 1.03 has nothing of relevance as far as I recall so we ignore it.

Episode 1.04:

... also not that relevant except that little scene at the end that I thought was in Episode 5 titled: The moment I fell in love with this show! When Bobby says „help“ it gets me every time! I keep expecting him to not answer but he asks for help and I gasp. Every. Damn. Time.

Episode 1.05

... is when it get’s really interesting because this is when the Sex addict meets the women he has been emotionally intimate, which is, you know, the thing he’s sensitive about!

I really like how Buck is all in Protector-Mode and seems so competent up until when they’re in the car together and Abby starts to talk about them (him) not having wanted to meet and it hit’s him that uuups, this is the actual woman he has been talking to! A human being (and not just some voice on the phone he talks to) and an attractive one as it is (and boy do I love how dressed down Connie Brighton is most of the time? Look, she’s pretty and she’s not 25 and she looks it and that’s okay!) so again Buck deflects by making the whole exchange about Sex - you know, physical intimacy because he is scared of emotional intimacy. Which is what I have been trying to prove here.

Then they save that little girl and have the very sweet moment in the car were Buck is very vulnerable, though I think it’s mostly for Abby’s benefit? Because Buck is in protector mode and there is nothing Buck wouldn’t do to help someone else, even flay himself open. He’s just selfless like that.

And then they find Patricia and bring her home and he is very uncomfortable and then he says goodbye all sweet and Patricia tells him to be kind to Abby and Buck is already in so deep, so really someone should have taken the time to tell Abby to be kind and nice to this boy (if Buck gets another love interest I want someone to give them the shovel talk, mainly Hen or Eddie, possibly together, because this boy gives away too much of himself and it hurts me), but alas no one did, so Buck tries to protect himself by, you guessed it, talking about sex!

It really is a defense mechanism for him, which might prove that he came from a conservative background or might just not mean anything, besides that he is very comfortable with Sex and other people are not which is why he uses it to deflect. People generally don’t try to look to deep if you make them uncomfortable, which is generally Buck’s way of dealing with problems: he either pushes back and steamrolls over it or is it too loud and open about something, which keeps people from looking to deep (Season 3 is proof of that, the only person who sees through his act, I think, is Hen because she also uses false bravedo to deal with things. Eddie sees it too, but only after Buck explains it to him, because Eddie operates completely different - but that’s something I’ll talk more about later)

And then all of Bucks fears of people not liking him after seeing what’s underneath are proven right when, after spending a whole day with him, Abby tells him they shouldn’t see each other again because she too likes him and if they continue mistakes will be made (which is just her respecting Bucks wishes from 1.02 but also proves to Buck that no one can like him on a deeper level). She gives this very sweet speech about how good he makes her feel but if you look at Buck’s face it’s just sooo closed off. And then she does this very mean thing with the „do not fuck some tinder-girl“, which i find very hypocrit of her, because she basically told Buck she won’t give him more than what they currently have but also he’s not allowed to look somewhere else for it (although she is very right, Buck needs to learn to find validation in himself and not through other people, which is something he sorta did in Season 3? More on this later)

Which is why we get the phone sex scene at the end. Because at this point Buck has been emotionally intimate with this women and then he met her and he kept being emotionally intimate with him and she basically rejected him so Buck made it about physical intimacy. He rejected her back. Found a loophole. Pushed back.

And I know I’m ignoring the scene in between when he is all proud about not having sex with Abby, but yeah, he would have had if Abby let him so it doesn’t really count.

Side note: this whole Episode proves that Buck is not a sex addict - if he were we would have seen him maybe try and convince Abby or seen a scene of him struggeling with whether he should pick up another girl or something, but they didn’t. Nope, they gave up „Buck with Hen and Bobby - bonding time“.

Episode 1.06:

I dislike this one a lot because it calls the episode before a liar by having Abby go on a date with Buck, after saying they shouldn’t meet each other again. I actually checked IMDB to see if there was a christmas break between those episodes, but nope, they aired a week apart! (Also how everyone pushes Buck into doing Valentine’s day even though he doesn’t like it? Yeah, not on board.)

But you know what’s relevant af about this Episode? The scene between Bobby and Buck where Dad helps his son get ready. I truly think this scene, combined with his firing in 1.01 is what caused the shift into Buck 2.0.

Also canon yet again tells us that Buck is not in fact a sex addict but rather using sex to avoid real intimacy and then they have this bantery conversation about not being a dick by having sex on the first date and being a gentleman and I love how Peter and Oliver play off of each other here. This scene is so much fun to watch because they clearly had so much fun acting it.

We can basically jump over the rest of the episode, but I do want you to look at the scene between Bobby and Abby in the hospital for a moment because I 100% thought they were setting up a love triangle here? (Again, someone with Twitter ask Tim Minear)

Episode 1.07:

The actual time jump according to IMDB happens between those episodes (someone who watched Season 1 live please confirm) although in the story there isn’t - they just decided to air the Valentine’s episode in November and then come back in February to talk about the full moon - apparently.

Aside from that Buck is such an adorable dork in this episode which i truly think is why half this fandom is in love with him and some more scenes with Peter and Oliver that are just plain fun happen (and I love season 3 but I miss how much fun they got to have in Season 1). Also our first real bi!Buck sighting and the implication that Buck went from delivering Babys to delivering a tapeworm, only to go: I’m gonna have sex with my girlfriend now! And I honestly love him for that.

Other than that, not much to prove or disprove this meta except Buck being hesitant to go on another date and trying to explain away why he came to see Abby but her just cutting right through his bullshit.

Episode 1.08: not relevant

Episode 1.09:

Our second instance of Buck nearly dying. Buck’s „I don’t suppose you do a lot of pull ups“ kills me every time and Hen freaks out about it a little and he just loves it off. He is a true badass.

Also there is the Ballon scene which makes me mad, because Buck has every right to be upset about everything, even if none of it is Abby’s fault. I’m really up in the air about how I feel about the Bobby and Buck talk in the locker room because on the one hand side I do agree with everything Captain Dad says and I think this scene also is part of creating Buck 2.0 but on the other hand side he is kind of invalidating Buck’s feelings?

Anyways, Bobby tells him, that if Buck really likes Abby he needs to stop trying to feel like she needs saving and let her set the pace. I’m not saying it’s why Buck waited around so long for her in Season 2 but I do think Bobby basically telling him this is what a real man would do - the thing Buck wants so badly to be - plays a role. It’s too bad that while Buck is all in, Abby is not.

I’m also gonna put my clown shoes on real quick and say we get a nearly identical scene in 2.10, when Buck talks to Chimney about Eddie and Shannon. Make of that what you want.

Episode 1.10:

Buck identifies with the guy using him to cat fish girls because he understands his need for connection and intimacy. After all he did the same thing, just a different method.

Also Abby leaves.

There’s not more to say

So this is where Season 1 ends, with Buck aware that he was trying to substitute physical for emotional intimacy and trying to correct it and build a life with Abby - which did not work because Abby left.

But I just wanna mention real quick how much character development Buck has in such a short amount of time! It floors me every time. And while we all know he attributes this to Abby, it’s really just about Buck being Buck and he was already on his way to becoming this guy, simply because through his job and the firefam suddenly he got validation? I feel so proud. I really only wish Buck would finally come to this realisation himself or maybe someone would tell him this. He deserves it.

#evan buckley #buck meta #buddie meta #buck #911 meta #911 #911 fox #textpost #mine #season 1 #meta #my meta

95 notes · View notes

artificialqueens · 4 years

Text

Different People (Different Arguments), 1/14 (Branjie/Jankie) - Ortega

a/n: once upon a time there was an author named Ortega who wrote war and fucking peace of a the thick of it au called Just the Game We’re In. she finished it and was proud of it and everything was fine. then suddenly, it turned out one of the main characters was…well, we’ll park that. so Ortega then decided to rewrite it with different girls, a few different details, and a different title. and it’s called Different People (Different Arguments)! and chapter one is here now for u all to enjoy (i hope).

(ps. no i’ve not forgotten about strictly au)

fic summary: Brooke Lynn is a political advisor for a government department where she has to contend with an incompetent Minister, maintaining her stone-cold bitch image, working alongside a press team of slackers, and the Prime Minister’s ever-so-slightly terrifying enforcer breathing down her neck 24/7. So when a familiar face from her past arrives as her new boss, she’s not exactly thrilled to add another problem to her ever-growing pile.

And then she admits she’s got a crush on her coworker.

In this chapter: A standard working day is turned on its head when Brooke has to play a role in engineering Cabinet Minister Darienne Lake’s resignation.

***

High heels. The definitive sound of Brooke’s job. Day in, day out the click-clack, click-clack sound would echo through the offices, closely followed by the constantly ringing phones and the tap-tap-tap of keyboards. Often there was also shouting, the volume of which was never helped by the design of the building which allowed every whisper to be amplified by around a million decibels and broadcast into the lobby.

Brooke hated the new building. She’d hated the idea of moving into it, insisting it would reflect badly on their party and cost them in the polls.

“What kind of message is it going to send out?” she’d rolled her eyes, tearing her hands through her hair. “If we’re trying to tell the public we’re still in touch with them and understand their fears of another recession it doesn’t exactly help moving into what looks like Aquaman’s secret fucking lair.”

She had been ignored, of course, as the decision had already been made. Brooke often wondered what the point of being a political advisor was if nobody ever actually listened to your advice, especially since the person you were supposed to be giving advice to seemed to be blundering about the world of politics like a headless chicken. Darienne Lake had been head of the Department for Social Affairs and Citizenship (Dosac for short) for quite some time now. Too long, Brooke thought. It was harrowing working for a woman who was clearly in the wrong profession, watching her get slammed by the media almost daily as a result of the latest crackpot policy she’d dreamed up. Brooke could’ve left the department a long time ago, should’ve left a long time ago. But she didn’t.

Politics was all about climbing the ladder and making connections. It was a game of chess, and over the years Brooke had seen many people make the wrong move both in and out of the public eye and subsequently watched them get disposed of. She’d seen people cross to the other side, watched both her own party and the opposition divide and conquer. It was all extremely black and white. The party line was a tightrope you had to walk. If you stepped out of line, you fell off the tightrope. If you weren’t up to date on what the line was, the tightrope got cut.

Brooke could appreciate it wouldn’t sound hugely appealing to someone who didn’t live, breathe, eat, sleep and shit politics. However, this was her world. It had been her world since she’d started watching the news when she was six years old and heard her family talk about the politicians on the screen, and her need to be within the political realm only intensified when she left school and went to uni to study politics and economics, her drive and determination ensuring she graduated with a first class degree. Something that never got old to Brooke were people’s reactions when they discovered she wasn’t some dyed blonde lobotomy job who’d slept her way up the ladder. She wanted to keep giving people that shock day after day, and if that meant staying and advising an under-qualified, over-privileged cabinet Minister, then she could grit her teeth and bear it.

The echoey click-clack of Brooke’s heels provided a soundtrack as she briskly made her way across the black tiles of the department building’s lobby and pressed one red acrylic nail to the button of the lift, the doors sliding open almost instantly. As she stepped inside, quickly checking her reflection in the mirror, there was the frenzied sound of heels on tiles and a panicked yelling.

“Hold the lift!”

Smiling to herself, Brooke held the doors open as a small, pint-sized blonde ball of energy hurtled through them. Catching her breath and smoothing down her white shift dress, she shot her friend a quick smile.

“Morning, girl!”

“Hey, Jan. Great timing,” Brooke smirked as her friend fixed her windswept hair in the mirror.

If you’d ever asked Brooke if she could’ve seen herself becoming best friends with a previous member of the opposition she would have laughed in your face, but Jan was an exception. She had crossed the floor three months ago, finding a job as one of Darienne’s junior policy advisors after she became disillusioned with the ruthless ideals of the opposition. From what Brooke had heard, the offices of Nicky Doll’s party had been a little cliquey and Jan had wanted to spread her wings. Understandably, Brooke had been suspicious of her at first but Jan had been persistently kind and sweet to her to the point where Brooke basically blinked and they were friends as well as colleagues.

“What’s on the Minister’s agenda today then?” Brooke laughed humourlessly, leaning against the lift’s cool metal wall. “Are we demanding the extension of all buses by 30 centimetres? Bringing back the ha’penny? Outlawing kids?”

Jan threw her head back and laughed. “No, although all very possible Darienne ideas. We’ve to sort the public transport data before 5pm. That’s the only real pressing thing we have to do today.”

Brooke felt uneasy. The prospect of 24 hours that didn’t seem like being strapped to a bullet train speeding through fire seemed too good to be true. Something was always going wrong at Dosac and the fact that the only important thing they had to do with their day was to type some figures into an excel spreadsheet was suspicious.

“How was your weekend anyway?” Jan asked, smiling kindly.

Brooke thought back to the previous two days which were spent holed up in her studio flat eating instant noodles and working her way through expenses forms which the Minister should have been doing herself.

“Oh, you know…just a quiet one,” she gave Jan a small smile, which she returned.

The elevator doors opened and Brooke and Jan made their way to their desks. They were stopped in their tracks by a tiny, olive-skinned woman with flowing dark locks of hair babbling away at them at about a mile a minute. Smirking, Brooke shared an affectionate glance with Jan.

“And good morning to you too, human megaphone,” Brooke smiled, lazily throwing her jacket over her desk as the girl rolled her eyes.

“Brooke Lynn! This is serious shit. It would help if you made it into fuckin’ work on time,” she snapped back, pacing back and forth in her heels with worry.

“Relax, Vanessa. We were only a minute off, Darienne’s not going to be in for another fifteen,” Jan smiled lazily, kicking her heels off as she lounged in the wheely chair behind her desk. “Anyway, what’s the panic? It’s a chill day.”

There was one second of almost-silence as the clicks of computer mouses and the whirr of monitors were the only sounds in the room. Then, Vanessa’s eyes widened in horror. Brooke’s stomach dropped as she met Jan’s eyes- she’d known the prospect of a quiet day had been a veritable pipe dream.

“A chill…shit, you guys didn’t get the briefing that Nina sent out? Oh Christ, what am I doin’ even asking that.”

“Are my ears burning?” came a sleepy voice from down the hall. A figure emerged bundled up in countless scarves and woollen cardigans, her blonde frizzy curls only just visible through the layers of clothing. Her manicured fingernails were curled around a Starbucks cup, which she was clinging to for dear life.

“Morning, Nina! Great timing!” Vanessa greeted her sarcastically.

“Ignore her, girl. She hasn’t had her morning shot of Sambuca yet,” Jan drawled, smiling at the human game of pass the parcel who was currently detangling herself from her mummification of knitted clothing. Nina was Dosac’s press secretary who was kind and easy-going but also did the bare minimum, as her determination started and ended at getting home to her wife Monét and the latest episode of EastEnders every day. The girls all both loved her and were vexed by her in equal measures as it was often near to impossible to get any information from her or through her. But Brooke had to admit she did make a good cup of tea.

“Nina. Is there a reason why these bitches haven’t been briefed on Darienne’s interview with Raja Gemini today?” asked Vanessa.

Brooke threw her head back and groaned. Oh, fuck. This was bad news. Raja was one of the fiercest bitches in the media, a BBC journalist who was almost impossible to influence with spin. Fixing Nina with a stony glare, she was irritated even more when she simply shrugged.

“Vanessa, that email was sent to me at four minutes past five yesterday evening and you know fine well that the moment it hits five o’clock my out of office is on and my work phone is off,” Nina raised her eyebrows, curling her Bluetooth headset round her ear as she logged into her computer.

“Christ. So the Minister has a Gemini interview and we’ve got no idea what it’s meant to be covering,” Brooke massaged her temples slowly.

“Well, I’ll tell you what it’s about. She’s runnin’ with the mobile phone policy,” Vanessa sighed, nodding fiercely as both Brooke and Jan cried out in disbelief.

“Absolutely not. I thought we’d convinced her that it was a non-starter?!” Jan exclaimed, her tone nothing short of outraged.

“Apparently she’s feelin’ the pressure of the opposition as a result of Nicky pushing to cut down on Co2 emissions, so she wants to bring out a policy that goes hand in hand with that so the government can look good.”

“That doesn’t even make any fucking sense! God, Nicky could sneeze and she’d be ‘feeling the pressure’. Sometimes it’s like this department’s being run by a startled cat,” Jan sighed, pushing her blow-dried waves of hair away from her face with her hand.

“Yeah, I always think watching her decision-making process is like watching an enormous baby trying to do calculus,” Brooke piped up, humour masking the genuine, real fear that this disastrous policy was about to go live. Its basic premise was to fine people who used their phones while they walked, to avoid collisions between pedestrians on the streets and therefore reduce waiting times at Accident and Emergency as there were less injuries. It was absolutely insane, but then this was a typical Darienne Lake policy. Vanessa had once told Brooke that she often genuinely wondered if someone was sneaking cocaine into Darienne’s pasta salads.

Obviously suffering from a rare pang of guilt, Vanessa sighed as she leant against Jan’s desk. “I don’t know. I think sometimes this party’s way too harsh on her. And the press.”

“Can you blame them?!” Brooke snorted derisively. “It sucks, but if you’re a woman in politics and you go out in dresses that look like someone put stick-on diamantes onto a burlap sack mid-seizure, of course Hello magazine are going to have a field day.”

“Come on, Brooke Lynn, you gotta admit that she’s a very nice woman,” Vanessa shook her head, laughing only slightly.

“Being a very nice woman doesn’t make you a good politician, though,” Jan chipped in with a grimace.

“So you’re going to follow her when she eventually goes then, Vanessa?” Nina piped up from behind her monitor, her eyebrows raised high into her blonde curls. Vanessa bit her lip.

“…well. I still want some form of career, let’s not take it too far.”

The three girls laughed as Vanessa blushed pink. Vanessa’s loyalty to Darienne didn’t stretch all that far. When Darienne had entered the job last year it had also meant she had arrived as Darienne’s senior advisor. It had quickly become clear to Brooke that Vanessa had got to where she was by telling people what they wanted to hear, smiling and nodding at every turn as Darienne drove the department into one dead end after another. Brooke admired Vanessa’s craftiness; her method of going along with whatever Darienne wanted meant that whenever the time came to blame someone Darienne never looked her way. Of course, Vanessa secretly hated basically every idea that Darienne had and quickly grew to trust Brooke (and eventually Jan when she joined the party) as somebody she could share her true feelings with. Over her time as part of Dosac the three girls had become great friends, forming a sort of secret alliance of common sense against Darienne’s crazy politics. She didn’t look in any way like a traditional government advisor, but Brooke still thought she was amazing.

At her job, that is.

“Face it, V,” Jan smiled sleepily, giving a stretch as Brooke shook herself out of her daydream. “Everyone’s running from Darienne like…ugh, I’m crap at one-liners at this time of the morning. Brooke, help me out?”

“Like she runs from Weight Watchers? Like obesity runs in her family? Like McDonald’s employees run whenever she steps foot in the building? Come on, Jan, that one was easy.”

“Guys, c’mon! That’s both way harsh an’ fatphobic as shit. Check yourself,” Vanessa chastised her friends, shaking her head. Jan pulled a guilty face and made a helpless gesture.

“All I’m saying is that Darienne Lake is sinking like the Titanic, if the Titanic was on fire and made entirely of burning shit, and we’re going to be playing the violins if we don’t start distancing ourselves from her as soon as we can,” she yawned.

“Does shit float or sink?” pondered Brooke as she chewed a pen.

“That’s not really the point here,” Jan rolled her eyes.

“Look, I don’ give a shit about burlap sacks, or burnin’ shit, or spitroasting or whatever the fuck you guys are talking ‘bout, I just think she’s gonna notice if we start lookin’ like we’re about to jump ship!” Vanessa cried, flustered.

Jan and Brooke shared a concerned look.

“I didn’t say anything about spitroasting. Do you even know what spitroasting is?” Brooke laughed uproariously. Jan and Nina giggled as Vanessa shot Brooke a displeased glare.

“No. It don’t sound very classy,” she sniffed, scrolling through her phone nonchalantly. As the laughter died down, Nina sighed from her desk.

“Even if she does notice, it won’t be an issue. I heard Bianca’s sorting her departure.”

The three girls gave Nina equally shocked glances, their jaws slack at this bomb of information coming from someone who was usually so little help.

“You…heard something? You have working ears? You have a working set of five senses?” Brooke teased her, gobsmacked but also a little excited at the prospect of getting someone competent in to run the department.

“Hey, I am actually of some use sometimes! Akeria over at Richmond Terrace told me at our last meeting.”

All at once, Brooke deflated in her seat. “Right, so what you really mean is…a senior press officer for the opposition told you that Bianca was planning to get rid of Darienne, knowing she’d eventually find out and making sure she’d become rattled so that Nicky would be able to capitalize on the fact that she’d be acting more like a bat on Ritalin than normal.”

Seeing Nina’s peeved expression, Jan piped up. “I’m sure there’s some element of truth in it, Brooke. I mean, Akeria’s not exactly party loyal, she’s just a civil servant.”

Brooke gave a little exhale. Jan was kind to the point of frustrating sometimes. “Well, if what Nina is saying is a fact-”

“Excuse me, I’m not Beedle the fucking Bard!” Nina cut in, resembling a meerkat as her head popped over the top of her monitor.

“- then maybe we should start distancing ourselves,” Brooke finished, shooting Nina an irked look, annoyed at having been interrupted. She noticed that Vanessa was giving her a confused sort of glance.

“How? How do we create distance when we’re advising the bitch?” she stammered, clearly becoming nervous at the prospect of a minor coup. Brooke laughed. These were the situations where Vanessa’s inexperience showed and, although it was sometimes tedious having to hold her hand through such conditions, it was also ever so slightly endearing.

“Don’t panic, ‘Ness, it’ll be fine. Bianca will have it taken care of,” she smiled, trying her best to reassure her friend.

Casting her eye to the clock, Jan narrowed her eyes. “V, you should probably head downstairs and meet the Minister. Her car’s going to be pulling up in, like, a minute.”

Cursing, Vanessa trotted towards the lifts as fast as her high heels could carry her. Brooke watched as she left, then exhaled loudly as she switched her computer on. Trying her best to relax, she cast her eye over the office. Apart from one glass-fronted room at the far end which belonged to Darienne, the majority of it was open plan. It was mostly filled with identical IKEA desks which were all the same shade of creamy grey and topped with piles and piles of work. Vanessa’s desk was messy with post-it notes plastered all round the screen of her monitor, encroaching on top of the piles of folders and ringbinders like some kind of horrific, neon disease. Brooke’s own was a sort of middle ground- most things were ordered but the nature of the job meant that sometimes a chaos of papers, files and briefing notes would sometimes hurricane itself across her desk. A stark contrast to the other two, Jan’s desk was like a beacon of order and tidiness in the hectic office. Everything had its place, her folders were all stored neatly and were colour-coded, and a packet of disinfectant wipes sat just beside the screen of her monitor. Their desks represented the three of them quite well.

Over to her left beside the lifts sat the cluster of desks which housed the communications team. Nina sat at its helm, situated near the desks of the advisors. To the right of Nina’s desk sat the two senior press officers, Scarlet and Yvie, and to Nina’s left were the two junior press officers, Jaida (who Brooke often thought to be far more competent than Nina and often prayed the two would somehow find themselves in some form of Freaky Friday body swap) and Adore, whose chair was empty. Brooke rolled her eyes hard- Adore had started as a civil service intern and Darienne had ended up keeping her on permanently. It had been another one of her diabolical decisions as Adore was ever so slightly scatterbrained, preferred scrolling her socials to tackling any of the pile of incomplete work the size of Kilimanjaro on her desk, and devoted around 90% of her day to making cups of tea. As a person she was great fun and brought a certain element of life to the office when everyone was down, but as someone Brooke had to work with she was a challenge. There had been many times where Brooke had fleetingly thought of pushing over the pile of folders on her desk one day and killing her, doing the department a great service.

Before Brooke could even open her emails, Darienne was marching through the department with Vanessa following behind her holding two large, red briefcases.

“Morning, morning!” she sing-songed as she made her way into her office. “Meeting in ten, yes ladies?”

Brooke shrugged half-heartedly in response, scrolling through her emails with disinterest. As she watched Darienne swing her office door shut she let out a huge, bored sigh.

There was suddenly a flurry of activity as the sound of approaching footsteps thundered along the corridor. Soon enough, a small girl with wide eyes, cheeks flushed pink and blonde hair with black roots appeared and flung herself down into the empty desk beside Jaida. Getting herself comfy, she kicked her heeled boots off and fired up her computer. Adore had arrived.

“Jesus, Mary and Joseph, ain’t anyone able to get to work on time?!” Vanessa hissed, exasperated and trying desperately to mask the fact that Adore had only just arrived at the office. Sipping on the coffee that was no doubt in her porcelain keep cup, Adore shot her a slack-jawed smile as the other press officers looked up from their work.

“Hey, I was working, thank you very much! I was doing important party business before I got here.”

“What kind of important party business?” asked Yvie, her interest piqued at the thought of Adore voluntarily doing any work.

“Laila McQueen,” Adore beamed, taking another big, loud sip. Jan laughed as Brooke rolled her eyes so hard they threatened to fall out her sockets. “Hey, it just means we have The Independent on our side for the next couple of days!”

“Good work, girl. You’re like a broadsheet Julia Roberts. I didn’t know Bianca had started pimping people out,” Scarlet shot Adore a sarcastic grin and received a tight-lipped smile and one middle finger in response which made her snort a laugh.

“Yeah, yeah, very good, Adore, real impressive. That’s your one minute of glory up. You think you could go and get us some tea? And maybe some pastries, Darienne’ll probably be hungry,” Vanessa ordered, Adore pouting and lazily rising from her desk.

“Probably? It’s not like there’s an element of doubt to it,” Brooke snorted a laugh. “Get her a cinnamon roll the size of a fucking Swiss cheese, that should do her fine.”

Five minutes later, Brooke found herself sipping a subpar cup of tea in Darienne’s office, craving the sweet embrace of death as she listened to her witter on about how Raja Gemini wasn’t that intimidating, and that contrary to popular belief she was able to hold her own against the big journalists. Jan was attempting to talk her down from the ledge of misplaced confidence she had seemed to have clambered up to, Vanessa was doing her best impersonation of a nodding dog, and Nina was sleepily casting her eyes between Darienne and Jan as they spoke, her notebook blank.

“Do you have a strong opening line?” Jan asked the Minister nervously, prodding at her lip with nerves. Darienne smiled smugly, leaning back and relaxing in her chair.

“Once we implement these fines, the waiting times at A&E will be shorter than the waiting times at McDonalds. Ambulances will practically start operating drive thrus!” she reeled off, grinning proudly at the line she’d clearly spent hours thinking up. Stifling laughter, Brooke watched the reactions of the other girls. Nina’s pen hovered above her notebook hesitantly as if she couldn’t quite believe she had to write the drivel down, and Vanessa and Jan were staring at each other, wide-eyed with incredulity.

“Jesus. I’ve seen stronger newborn children,” Brooke sighed as she leant forward and sat her cup of tea on Darienne’s desk, too disgusted to attempt to drink any more. “That cup of tea was stronger than that opening line.”

“Hey! I spent all night thinking that up,” Darienne cried, offended. Jan furrowed her brow.

“Honestly Darienne, it does kind of sound like you pulled it out of your ass.”

“Speaking of assholes, Bianca’s in the building,” Nina spoke up, checking her phone. The mood in the room suddenly plummeted.

Everyone was afraid of Bianca. The only separating factor was just how afraid they were of Bianca. She was the prime Minister’s enforcer and spin doctor, the lady who made it clear to everyone in government that they had to know the line and toe the line, often spinning the party out of crises like a terrifying dreidel. She had no time for time wasters, bluffers, blue-sky thinkers, or people who weren’t one hundred percent capable of doing their job, and often unleashed hell on those that weren’t. Brooke was a big girl, she could handle herself, but there was still something about the authority that Bianca radiated and how intimidating she was that made her just that little bit nervous. She knew she had an easy-going side, but Brooke hadn’t seen it often.

“She looking for us?” Vanessa asked nervously.

“No, I’m sure she’s walking around the department trying to get her steps in for the day. What do you think?!” Nina hissed back, glaring momentarily at Vanessa then back to her phone. “Any second now…”

“Good morning, Bianca,” Jan greeted as a woman strode confidently into the office on six-inch Louboutins. Despite the fact her caramel waves of hair had a slight haze of frizz from the drizzle outside she was otherwise perfectly put-together, wearing a matching black suit jacket and pencil skirt combo. Her makeup was bright like the patterns on a poisonous frog and her lips were painted with bright red lipstick. Or perhaps that was just the blood of another poor cabinet Minister.

“Yes, good morning, and I’m hoping it’s going to be a good fucking morning, because this one-” she trained a single black fake nail on Darienne’s face “-is fully prepped for her Gemini interview at 12, correct?”

“Don’t worry Bianca. I was up all night,” Darienne gave her a saccharine sweet smile, which Bianca turned her nose up at.

“So you’re fully aware she thinks it’s an utterly fucking horrible idea?” Bianca tilted her head very slightly.

“She’s not the only one,” Jan muttered, just loud enough for Brooke to hear.

Darienne looked somewhat put out, her face falling. Sighing, Brooke looked to the ceiling. Vanessa was right- the Minister was a nice lady, but how in the hell could she think that policy was anything less than an utter car crash?! Brooke began to allow herself to daydream, which admittedly was always a risk in Bianca’s presence, but already this day was like a huge, massive wave towering over them all before a tsunami and she needed to disconnect. She was aware of Bianca’s voice tearing into Darienne in the background.

“What if she asks you how many police hours this will take up? What are you going to say then?”

“I would simply point her to the amount of money that this policy would generate, which would well make up for the drain on resources-”

“Jesus H Fuck, who did your media training? Myra Hindley? Don’t use the word ‘drain’! Don’t use any words with any negative connotations whatsoever! I don’t want a single word out of place in this interview; otherwise Gemini is going to start analysing it like Gillian McKeith analyses people’s shit.”

Darienne appeared to think things over for a moment. “So can I…I mean…can I use the word no?”

Brooke only just stopped herself from physically slapping her hand to her forehead. Bianca looked incredulously at the faces of the four other girls, each as long-suffering as the last.

“Have I suddenly imagined a storybook character into life? Did a child make a wish on a shooting star last night, is that why fucking Moon-Face is sitting at a desk in front of me? Are the other Faraway Tree friends about to walk in through the door and start running the country?”

Darienne cast her eyes to the floor, the message well and truly received.

“You mentioned the amount of money that this would generate. Is this going to be the saving grace of this policy? Is this going to be the diamond ring within the shit of the dog who accidentally ate it?”

“You’re very faecally focussed today, Bianca,” Jan piped up with a frown as Brooke stifled a laugh.

“Yeah, well. It’s hard not to be when you’re within a 5 mile radius of this department,” she scoffed.

“Well within the first month, we’re looking to generate around…um, Vanessa?” Darienne cast her eyes to the senior advisor, whose gaze shifted to Bianca nervously.

“Unbelievable. She can’t even retain her own fucking figures. Come on then, Britain’s number fifteen Rihanna impersonator, give me some good fucking news.”

“Uh, we think…well, Darienne thinks…that within the first month of enforcement we could generate around £25,000 in £50 fines.”

Bianca’s face grew very gradually cold, Vanessa freezing to the spot as if she’d just been stared at by Medusa. Even Brooke shivered.

“You mean to tell me,” she began, her voice extremely measured and shaking only slightly. “That out of a population of 64 million people, who normally stumble around the streets with their heads in their phone screens like puppets with their strings cut, we’d be able to fine…500 a month?”

“Well, we deliberately predicted under target so that the actual figure would come as a pleasant surprise!” Darienne smiled back, completely nonplussed at Bianca’s rage.

“If I could interject, I don’t seem to remember there being any ‘we’ about it,” Nina spoke up dryly, before lowering her head back down into her notebook.

“I really love the logic of this department. Maybe you should all become teachers! 50 add 50 equals 25, and when you find out that the real answer is actually 100, well that’s just a fucking pleasant surprise, isn’t it?! The crime stats from the last quarter revealed that there had been 73 murders committed, except- what a nice surprise! There were actually 78, because we forgot to count your five fucking bodies after I ripped them to fucking shreds!”

Brooke had no idea why Darienne was so calm. It was like her brain had been replaced by a huge goldfish bowl. Vanessa, however, looked a little shell-shocked, and Brooke couldn’t help the pang her heart gave as her protective instincts took over.

Only for a moment, though.

“We’ve got time to accumulate some more accurate figures. They wouldn’t be bang on, but definitely a lot more impressive than £25,000, and they’d probably placate Gemini,” Brooke shrugged, sitting up a little straighter in her seat as she addressed Bianca. Casting her frown Brooke’s way, Bianca seemed to calm down very slightly.

“Finally someone in this room that isn’t a massive, walking, talking sac of amniotic fluid. Get it done, okay? I’ll see you all after the interview.”

As Bianca left the room, the other girls all visibly relaxed. Vanessa began rubbing at her shoulder, clearly tense after being momentarily in the firing line. Flustered, Darienne finally spoke.

“Right well, Brooke, if you could sort that out within the hour,” she smiled, as if she was in control in any way. “Jan and Nina, if you could stay with me so that we can smooth out the finer details of this interview, and Vanessa if you could get started on the transport data please.”

“Uh, that ain’t gonna be possible, Minister, ‘cause I got a lot of stuff left over from yesterday an’ I still need to send that email over to Nick at the treasury, an’ uh…” Vanessa suddenly blurted out, clearly still slightly rattled from Bianca’s visit. Brooke screwed her face up. What the fuck was she doing? Darienne looked equally perplexed as Vanessa stammered a correction. “I mean…no, yeah, of course. I’ll get it done as soon as I can.”

As Darienne dismissed them and Brooke and Vanessa marched out of the office, Brooke immediately grabbed her by the arm and wrenched her into the toilets.

“Brooke Lynn! What the hell?!” Vanessa protested, her eyes fiery.

“What the hell was that in the office there?!”

Vanessa knit her brows together. “You told us to start distancing ourselves from her! I was tryin’ my fuckin’ best!”

“Yeah, distancing yourself, not starting a revolution! Am I talking to someone who works in politics or a seventeen year old who just got a D in their Modern Studies A-level?!” Brooke sighed, exasperated. She regretted it immediately when she saw Vanessa’s shoulders slump forward as she did her best impression of a kicked puppy.

“I’m sorry,” Vanessa muttered, shaking her head slightly. “I just…Bianca kinda panicked me.”

Without thinking, Brooke rested her hand on Vanessa’s arm in an attempt to comfort her. “Look…I know it’s hard for you. I get that you entered politics as Darienne’s aide and that if she goes, the road ahead is going to be kind of…non-existent. Well, not non-existent, just extremely winding and bumpy and parts of it might not have been built yet. But you’re party loyal, right?”

Vanessa nodded silently. “I’m not a fuckin’ hack. I came into this job so I could help change things for people, except sometimes I just feel like we’re not doing much good.”

“Yeah, well. That’s because the PM is too balls-deep in his secretary to run the country for more than five minutes, but anyway. The point is that you’ll be okay, we’ll all be okay! You, me, Jan. The dream team,” Brooke beamed at her, her heart soaring as Vanessa’s face lit up. “Just keep following whatever Darienne does, but keep your ears open. Any sign of a possible new option, glue yourself to them. Do your best leech impression.”

Vanessa’s face contorted as she took Brooke’s last comment literally, and both of them shared a laugh.

“But don’t panic. Like Jan said, Bianca’s going to sort it. You saw her in there, she’s at the end of her tether with that giant egg we’ve got running the department. We’ll be fine.”

As Vanessa giggled, Brooke found herself blushing very slightly. Stepping forward that little bit more, she wrapped her arms around Vanessa in a gentle hug. She smelt of a very sweet, sugary perfume, and momentarily Brooke found it hard to let go, her heart thudding in her ribcage.

“Thanks, Brooke. You’re a sweetheart,” Vanessa smiled bashfully as she pulled away, sweeping her hair behind her ears. Brooke cast her eyes to the floor, embarrassed by the compliment.

“Come on. We’ve got work to do. You should start doctoring those transport stats for fun.”

Pushing open the door, Vanessa laughed and raised her eyebrows. “I got a C in my Modern Studies A-level anyway, so I don’t appreciate the accusation, ma’am.”

As the two girls made their way back to their desks, Brooke tried to clear her head. The conversation had dredged up a lot of feelings she’d been trying to repress. She didn’t have a crush on Vanessa. She wasn’t attracted to her like that at all. She was just protective of her, and she couldn’t help it if she was cute when she was flustered, or nervous, or happy, or irritated, or doing anything. That was just a fact. It didn’t mean she liked her as anything more than a friend.

Besides, the position of token workplace lesbian couple had already been filled by Scarlet and Yvie.

***

Brooke sighed, her disapproval hidden in the darkness of the news studio along with cameras, a teleprompter, and Vanessa. Why in the name of God was this interview live? It was barbaric to screen a brutal murder on lunchtime TV. Christ, there could be kids watching. Casting her eyes to the ceiling, she knew that Nina could have helped the situation. She could’ve pushed for it to be pre-recorded. But in her head she was already hearing the excuse about Raven at the BBC being “such a nice girl”, and that “she complimented my outfit once at Alyssa’s book launch”, so perhaps there was never any chance of it being anything but live.

As the Minister stammered and stuttered her way through her lines, Brooke wondered how Raja was able to keep such a stony, cold expression. She was essentially watching the complete breakdown of Darienne’s political credibility in front of her, that was surely worth some pity. Contemplating the situation, Brooke supposed that having pity wasn’t really going to do a journalist any favours. Raja had been out at Gaza, for fuck’s sake. She was hardly going to be sympathetic to this human pannacotta sat in front of her, Darienne’s voice wobbling and wavering over every line she spoke as Raja’s eyes bore into her.

Brooke looked briefly to Vanessa, who was just looking at Darienne sadly. Brooke had to feel sorry for her. Vanessa had placed her trust in the Minister to introduce her to the world of politics, a world she clearly wanted to be a part of for all the right reasons, and yet this was the thanks she got. Sitting having to watch her boss pedal horrific policy after horrific policy and watching as her and her colleagues got constantly ignored.

She deserved better.

Momentarily Brooke thought about making a joke, but reasoned that it would probably go down as well as a lead balloon. Instead, she texted Jan, safe from the debris of Darienne’s collapsing career at the office where she, Bianca and the communications team were all watching.

B: Jesus. I’ve seen ISIS condemned for less than this.

There was a pause as Jan texted back. Brooke tuned back into the interview.

“…shorter than the, um, waiting times at McDonalds. Ambulances will practically start operating drive thrus!”

Brooke audibly groaned. Darienne had obviously inflated her life belt, pulling out her precious line as a last-ditch attempt to save the interview. Raja was less impressed.

“That sounds like an extremely serious comparison, Minister, you’re saying that this policy will simply rush patients through A&E as if they were…a burger? How thorough will doctors and nurses be?”

And there Darienne was again, back to flailing around the interview as if she was drowning.

J: I’ve never seen a human being reduced to actual liquid before. Hope you have a tub to transport her back to the office.

B: How’s Bianca holding up?

A pause.

J: I’ve seen mothers look less disgusted at their own afterbirth.

B: I really hope you haven’t.

***

The first thing Brooke, Darienne and Vanessa were greeted with on their arrival back at the office was Nina, a frown on her face.

“Well I’m glad that interview went so well. We’ve been fending off calls from several papers asking if this policy is, quote, the government’s dying whalesong, and The Sun are planning to run with the headline ‘Would you like dies with that’, in reference to the suggestion that the NHS is about to go down the drain.”

Brooke shook her head in contempt. “Imagine going to university for three years, getting a first in journalism, and then being paid to come up with that crap.”

“Absolutely. I think we should run with the line that these accusations are nonsensical,” Darienne bristled, annoyed that her pride and joy of a policy wasn’t making the impact it was supposed to. Brooke snapped her head round to face the Minister.

“I mean, I don’t think we can cover our backs that easily. You did that interview sounding as if you’d just survived a house fire, I mean why did you include that drive-thru line?!”

“It was an emergency! It was a last ditch attempt, I had to do something!” Darienne barked back, her face set in a frown.

Vanessa butted in. “An emergency line? A line to be used in an emergency? What the hell were the instructions? In case of emergency, break glass by throwin’ yourself through the top floor window of Broadcasting House?!”

The shouting match was stopped abruptly as Jan’s calm drawl trailed through the office. “Brooke, I just got a text from Bianca. She said she wants to see you in her office in five minutes, and if you’re late she’s going to make you stand in the Dosac lobby on a hot day and watch your face fry off.”

A horrified pause. “Her words, not mine.”

Exhaling noisily, Brooke grabbed her bag from where she’d just thrown it down on her desk. She tried to ignore Darienne’s smug smile as she made her way to the lift and a meeting with the most feared woman in politics.

***

Being able to see the inner workings of 10 Downing Street was like the part in The Wizard Of Oz when the curtain gets pulled back to reveal the Wizard as a sham. On the outside, it was the most perfect professional façade, a backdrop for thousands of press announcements, resignations and appointments. On the inside it resembled a prison riot at best, a hive of people running around trying to fix something, or spin something, or frantically complete some piece of unfinished work. It was slightly quieter today, Brooke had noticed, as she sat on a hard, wooden chair outside Bianca’s office.

She’d been there dead on time but Bianca was running ten minutes late so far. Lesser, more idiotic humans would call her out on it, but Brooke had a functioning brain and a desire to stay alive until at least the end of the day. She blew a strand of hair out of her face and curled her lip. She hadn’t a clue why Bianca had called her for a meeting and chose to pass up on the opportunity to berate Darienne about that car crash of an interview. If Bianca was looking for someone to blame, it couldn’t be Brooke. She had been under the impression that Bianca found her tolerable, but you could never really tell what her opinions on anything were. The woman’s poker face was so good she could’ve gone professional in Vegas.

The varnished, wooden door of Bianca’s office suddenly swung open, Bianca standing poised in front of Brooke like a bird of prey.

“You’re late,” she sniffed, as she held the door open for Brooke to come in. Mumbling an apology, Brooke slumped down into the leather-bound chair opposite Bianca’s desk and simply waited for whatever was about to come, looking casually around the room. It was a setting she knew all too well- the marble, white fireplace, the eerie green lamp giving off an abnormal white light on her desk. The nondescript paintings of some long-dead war heroes, the bookcases filled with files and files and files. The entire room screamed power and intimidation.

“Do you want a coffee, Brooke?” Bianca began casually as she sat down opposite her. Perplexed, Brooke shook her head.

“I’m okay…I’d kind of just like to find out why I’m here. I mean, aren’t you supposed to be after Darienne?”

Snorting a laugh, Bianca rose from her chair and moved to perch on the edge of her desk. She was slightly above Brooke’s level, but her tone and general aura were quite relaxed, bordering on informal.

“You were friends with Jaqueline Cox at university, correct?”

Ouch. The memories ripped through Brooke’s mind like a migraine. Jackie Cox, the know-it-all in every seminar. Jackie Cox, the try-hard in every presentation. Jackie Cox, with the smug smile and the glossy dark hair and the perfect matching stationary. She knew Jackie, and Brooke knew enough to know she wasn’t a fan.

“Friends is pushing it. She was on the same course as me and was about as irritating as thrush, and that’s all I really had to do with her,” she sniffed in her own non-committal way. Bianca flared her nostrils and made a face, indicating to Brooke that she’d given a wrong answer.

“Okay, maybe my phrasing was a little off. In case you haven’t noticed, you haven’t stumbled into some friendship bracelet craft class, this is Downing Street. So I’ll rephrase the question. Is she any good?”

Brooke felt momentarily like she was trapped in a lion enclosure. “Is she any good at…?”

“At juggling silicone breast implants and walking a tightrope over a lake of tepid piss. Is she any good at politics?!”

“God, I mean…I guess she’d be a good politician,” Brooke admitted begrudgingly. “She’s principled, she’s got strong morals and a backbone. She’s eloquent enough and nowhere near as big a car crash as that sheep’s placenta we’ve got as a Minister.”

Bianca smiled fleetingly, then stood and walked back to her chair, appeased.

“Perfect,” she said, her eyes boring into Brooke’s as she sat down. Looking momentarily behind her, Brooke shifted in her seat.

“So…why are you asking about Jackie?” she asked slowly, drawing each word out just that little bit too long to be necessary in her hesitation. Bianca smiled slowly in return.

“It came to my attention this afternoon that maybe there needs to be some…changes made around here. My party is being made to look like a laughing stock, and I don’t like it,” she growled, her eyes growing dark. “Darienne’s been palming off her expenses forms onto you, correct?”

Brooke nodded silently.

“Maybe it would be in your best interests…and the party’s best interests…to doctor them slightly. Then if they end up in the hands of the media…so be it. She’s left with no credibility, there’s no coming back from that. She’ll have to resign. Then really all that’s left to do is get a replacement in. Smooth as a bottle of Moët,” Bianca shrugged, leaning back in her chair calmly. Blinking twice, Brooke suddenly became apprehensive.

“Bianca, I can’t…I can’t just fake her expenses claims.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. Do you have a note from your Mum? Have you got a cold and you can’t take part in this part of your actual job? You’re surprising me, Brooke,” Bianca sighed, clearly disappointed. “I honestly thought you had something different in you. A spine, a brain. Some form of drive, determination to succeed. You love this party, yes? You came into politics to make a difference, right?”

Brooke flinched slightly. Bianca was hitting her where it hurt, and she knew it was going to get a rise out of her. “Of course. I want us to succeed. I want us to change things.”

Bianca smiled, glad to have received a sufficient reaction.

“Then sometimes things have to be done by any means necessary,” she said gravely, running her tongue along her teeth. “If Jackie accepts the offer, she’ll be the new head of Dosac by tomorrow afternoon.”

Something about the whole appointment of Jackie Cox didn’t sit right with Brooke. She was just an annoying, opinionated, mouthy university girl, and there were ten a penny of those in London. Why her? Why not someone slightly more tolerable?

“Why does it have to be Jackie, why can’t it be someone else?” she voiced what she was thinking, annoyed. Bianca laughed, clearly amused.

“Okay, Miss Political Advisor. Advise me, since I’ve clearly not weighed up all the options.”

Stuck for a moment, Brooke’s brain began racing round at a hundred miles an hour. “Kelly Mantle. The back bencher from Education, she’s good.”

“No. She looks too much like a resident of Whoville to be put in the spotlight. Can you imagine when she inevitably fucks up, what the headlines will be? Who dunnit? Whose fault is it this time? Who, who, who, all over the front pages like owls with tourettes.”

Brooke sighed, then perked up with another idea. “What about Bianca Castro from Health?”

“Who, Jiggly?” Bianca asked, nonplussed.

“…Bianca Castro. She has a good track record, the public would love her-”

“Yeah, Jiggly.”

“Bianca, her name isn’t Jiggly.”

“The media damn well think it is after they got hold of those photos of her at the all-you-can-eat world buffet. Not exactly astounding publicity for a junior health Minister. She’s going nowhere.”

Brooke barely held in a grunt of frustration. “Ongina, that MP for-”

“Her name literally sounds like vagina. PR disaster. Next.”

“Jade Jolie.”

“She couldn’t run a bath, never mind a department.”

“Lashawn, then?!”

Bianca threw her head back and hooted a laugh. “You’re joking, right? Can you imagine her even trying to pronounce some of the names on the immigration database? She stays firmly on the back bench.”

Brooke pouted a little, frustration seeping out of every pore. Seeing her obvious displeasure, Bianca’s tone became placating, the woman’s softer side making a rare appearance.

“Look. Right now, we need strong leaders in this party. Jackie is about as strong as we’re going to get from what I’ve heard, and we need her to steer us out of this ditch that Darienne’s gradually lowered us into. You don’t need to worry about a thing, apart from those expenses forms. I’ll take care of it,” she smiled, reassuring Brooke as she stood and made to leave. Before she reached the door, a thought suddenly struck her like iced lightning, freezing her to the spot.

“Bianca…” Brooke began hesitantly. “Do you think Jackie will come with her own people? I mean, I’m not hugely up to date with her movements, so I don’t know how prepared she’ll be, and I’m fine, I can look after myself, you know? But like, Vanessa…and Jan, of course. Will she…will they get to keep their jobs?”

Bianca’s eyes were instantly on her, searching and wondering about the hidden agenda behind Brooke’s question. “I’ve worked with you for a while, Brooke Lynn. I must say, I’ve never seen you get attached to anyone in this game.”

“Well, you know,” Brooke shrugged, maintaining a cool exterior. “We work well together. We’re a good team. And she’s a valuable member of the department, that’s all.”

“Vanessa or Jan?” Bianca questioned.

“They both are! I just…I just want to make sure they’ll both be fine.”

Bianca moved to the doorway, gently showing her out. “Just doctor those expenses. Try not to pop a blood vein while doing so.”

Sighing, Brooke shook Bianca’s hand and click-clacked her way down the marble hallway towards the famous black door. Not too far along the corridor, she heard Bianca call after her.

“Brooke Lynn!”

She turned around sharply.

“Loyalty gets remembered in this party. Especially by me.”

***

Brooke hit send on her email to Bianca at 5.30pm on the dot. Darienne had claimed for Ubers from here to Downing Street, business lunches at nearby curry houses, and, just for laughs, a helicopter. Brooke had felt a little guilty fabricating it all, but it was impossible not to. If she had a complete lack of morals she’d be working for Nicky’s party, not Darienne’s. However, as Bianca had said, it was for the good of the party that she had to go.

She was still unsure about Jackie though. If everything went smoothly, by this time tomorrow she’d be sitting in Darienne’s office barking orders at her. It would be like every university group project all over again. Brooke had never actively disliked Jackie, she’d just found her grating. She was slightly unique, though. True, there were many girls of her type on her course, argumentative and challenging, but there were few that held their composure so well throughout a debate, maintaining class and superiority the entire time. Maybe that’s why she’d rubbed Brooke the wrong way so violently. Anyway, there had been a good eight years separating her time at uni and her time within the realm of politics. Perhaps Jackie was different now.

Shutting down her computer, she swivelled her chair round to face the other girls. She’d communicated to everyone through hushed whispers that Bianca’s plan was being put into effect immediately, creating an excited buzz around the office for the last few hours of the day. Regrettably she’d noticed that Vanessa had become more subdued because of it, the girl clearly wondering where this left her career. Brooke wanted nothing more than to see her happy again. She just hadn’t had time to attempt to cheer her up in between the expenses and finishing the transport data.

It looked as if Adore had already left, her chair empty and her bag gone with her half-empty coffee cup on her desk. Nina had long since vanished, her desk clear and any evidence of her ever having been there completely gone. Jaida was clearly in for the long shift, still working steadily through her excel spreadsheet with an energy drink by her keyboard. Jan was pulling on her coat, fixing her hair rapidly, and Scarlet and Yvie looked ready to leave too. Vanessa suddenly appeared in front of her.

“Hey,” she smiled gently. “We’re goin’ for a drink, think we could all do with one after today. You coming?”

Brooke fleetingly thought of a night with the girls, of just having a laugh and being slightly less stressed than normal. The thought of a glass of wine was tempting, but then the immediate thought of work the next day and how chaotic it would be made her decision for her.

“Sorry, ‘Ness. I’m going to head back. Next time though, yeah?” Brooke gave a tight smile, sighing a little when Vanessa’s face grew slightly more disappointed than before. As she nodded understandingly and turned to leave, Brooke suddenly grabbed her hand without really knowing why. Checking the office to see if anyone was looking at them, Vanessa then gazed at Brooke, confused.

“Talk to me. You’re still worried about tomorrow, aren’t you?” Brooke murmured quietly, trying not to draw attention to them. Jan was chatting happily with Scarlet and Yvie was hugging Jaida goodbye, so they were safe for now.

Vanessa’s face was worried. “I just don’t like the uncertainty. I wouldn’t be as worried if it didn’t mean I could get split up from you and Jan. We’re so good together. I don’t wanna lose that.”

Brooke’s heart swelled a little in her chest. “Listen. Don’t make it common knowledge, but I might have had a hand in Bianca’s plan. She kind of hinted that I’d be repaid in some way. We’ll all stay, don’t worry. I trust her.”

Brooke almost breathed a sigh of relief as Vanessa’s shocked face grew into a bright, happy smile. “Fuck, Brooke Lynn, you serious?!”

“Yeah. I got one wish. I sold my soul to the devil. Sue me,” Brooke snorted sarcastically, making Vanessa laugh.

“Wait, what’d you have to do for her?” Vanessa whispered, her eyes excited.

“I had to sleep with her. It was horrendous. She eats pussy like I eat noodles. Slurp slurp slurp.”

Vanessa’s nose wrinkled up as she laughed uproariously, drawing the attention of the other girls to them to Brooke’s dismay. Vanessa looked beautiful when she laughed. Then again, she looked beautiful all the time. That was just a fact, of course.

“Hey, Brooke! You coming out with us or what? Silk and Akeria are joining, ” Yvie yelled over, smiling as she wrapped her arm around Scarlet’s slim waist. Brooke tried her best not to screw her face up- she had a hard time being polite to anyone from the opposition, even if they were only civil service comms officers.

“Nah, she’s being boring,” Vanessa teased, sticking her tongue out.

“Aw, come on, Brooke! You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take, ‘specially tequila ones,” Scarlet piped up, giggling and throwing her other arm around Yvie. Brooke smiled at the affectionate couple.

“Yeah, well, like Vanessa said, I’m being boring tonight. You and Yvie take care of those two liver transplants waiting to happen, okay? I can’t quite believe I’m saying it but you need to be the responsible ones.”

As Scarlet laughed, Yvie and Jan said their goodbyes to Brooke. Vanessa was still hovering at her desk, a small smile on her face as she bent down and hugged Brooke without warning.

“You’re the best member of this whole department, an’ the best damn work friend I could want,” she whispered, her words lighting up Brooke’s heart. Pulling back, she gave a quick glance to the girls who were waiting on the lift to arrive. “I owe you one, bitch. Have a good night. Eat dinner and sleep well, ‘kay?”

Brooke gazed fondly at Vanessa, her tiny frame retreating into the lift. Vanessa cared about her. She cared about everyone. It was part of the reasons why Brooke liked her so much.

In the most platonic way possible, obviously.

***

Arriving at work the next day, it was clear that Bianca’s plan had worked. Thanks to a few emails to the big papers, Darienne’s false expenses claims were plastered over all the front pages, giving a pretty damning verdict.

“She’s good at leaking, isn’t she? Bianca, I mean,” Nina pondered casually from her desk, causing Brooke to look up from The Times.

“She’s brilliant. She’s like an 85 year old woman that never did pelvic floor exercises,” Scarlet muttered, ignoring the ringing phone.

“Nothing in The Independent about it though, I’ll give you that, Adore. Laila McQueen must’ve been one satisfied customer,” Jan laughed, holding up the front page which was jarringly dissonant with the other headlines, instead focussing on something to do with the polar icecaps melting.

“I’m good! I keep telling you all and you never listen,” Adore winked cheekily, as the phone continued to ring.

“Ain’t someone gonna answer that?!” Vanessa snapped, frustrated. Jaida reached for the receiver hesitantly, looking at Nina to gauge her reaction. Fixing her eagle eyes on her in disapproval, Jaida drew her hand back as if the phone was a hot stove.

“I’ve told them all we’re in a no comment situation,” Nina turned to Vanessa, shrugging. “There’s nothing else we need to say. If those bastards don’t get the meaning of that then quite frankly they shouldn’t be in journalism.”

Brooke stayed quiet throughout the whole exchange. She was worried, fretting about what Darienne would say when she arrived. She knew full well she was going to get the blame, hell, she was to blame. As much as Brooke could pretend to be completely ruthless, the guilt was beginning to seep in. At this point everyone in the department knew it was Brooke who had a hand in fixing the expenses forms and although everyone was being perfectly normal and friendly towards her, she was concerned about what they really thought and what they’d say when she left the room.

She hadn’t even seen Jan come and stand next to her.

“You’re awful quiet today, sweetie,” she drawled, leaning against a set of shelves that contained about twenty thousand government files. “Everything alright?”

Brooke nodded silently, brushing her fringe out of her face. That didn’t appear to satisfy Jan.

“Look, nobody thinks any less of you for what you did. It’s politics, it’s not kid’s TV. Sacrifices have to be made, people have to be disposed of. You did the department a favour, to be honest,” she continued, as if she could read Brooke’s mind. Brooke couldn’t help but smile. Jan had a certain telepathic quality, and often she could begin cheering you up before you even knew what reasons you had to be sad. She was a total ray of sunshine, and her happy-go-lucky personality was welcome in the department today.

“Thanks, girl,” Brooke sighed, stretching out in her chair and giving Jan a tight smile. “That means a lot. You’re a blessing to this department. I mean, God knows the mood in here today’s about as flat as…well. Maybe it’s my turn to not be good at one-liners today.”

Jan laughed softly, leaning back a little more against the files. “I try my best. But hey, I should thank you! Once Darienne goes, I might see about standing as an MP in the next by-election.”

Brooke raised her eyebrows a little. She had no idea that Jan had even had ambitions outside of performing at every available karaoke bar London had to offer. “Really?!”

“Yeah, I’ve kind of been thinking about it for a while.”

Brooke was secretly excited about the prospect of working with just Vanessa. Purely because things would be easier to organise between just two people, and things would just run more smoothly. It wasn’t because she had a crush on her or anything, that would be a ridiculous accusation. Brooke was a professional. There was no scope for things like that in this game.

“Well, I’m sure you’d be amazing. The public would love you,” she smiled at her friend sincerely. Flattered, Jan relaxed completely against the shelves, a giant file careering from the top shelf onto the ground.

“I’ll get it,” Brooke reassured Jan, whose face was apologetic.

“Right, I’m goin’ to fetch Darienne,” Vanessa announced, making her way to the lifts a little nervously. “Smiles an’ happiness when she arrives please, people, try not to make the office feel too much like a wake.”

Yvie tipped her head back over the back of her chair, looking at Vanessa upside-down. “Are we not supposed to be mourning the bitch’s career?”

With a long-suffering shake of her head, Vanessa disappeared into the lift.

Five minutes later, Brooke was picking up the dropped file from behind the shelf when two sets of footsteps thundered through the office and a voice cut through the click-clack, tapping keyboards and ringing phones.

“MEETING ROOM, NOW!”

Slowly, Brooke crept towards Darienne’s office, following a running Nina and Jan. Darienne was standing behind the desk, her face a thunderstorm. As soon as Brooke skulked in she narrowed her eyes.

“Can someone, maybe Brooke Lynn, tell me why my face is all over the papers like a disgraced fucking gym teacher?!” she barked, her voice reverberating off the glass door of her office.

“Okay, there must have been some form of mix-up with the forms because yours was completely clean when I submitted it,” Brooke immediately fired back. She’d had a bit of time to come up with her defence and, even though it was completely feeble, it was better than silence.

“That’s got to be the most shit excuse I’ve ever heard. How does something like that happen?!” Darienne yelled back. Suddenly, everyone’s eyes shifted to the doorframe of the office, where Bianca had arrived.

“Hey, big spender,” she greeted the Minister, the joke sitting out of place with the purpose of her arrival.

“Bianca, I didn’t claim for those things. I don’t know what’s going on, I gave my forms to Brooke to do, we need to tell the press that these claims are fake!” Darienne gibbered, panicking like Bianca was holding her hostage.

“Yeah, what are we running with, Bianca? We’ve been in a no comment situation all morning,” Jan asked.

“The phone’s been ringing off the hook. I’ve been ignoring it but we’ve got to give them something soon enough,” Nina shrugged, nodding in agreement. Bianca let out a harsh exhale, rubbing her neck tersely.

“Oh, Jesus Christ, could you all just get off my back for a hot second?! You’re like a pack of fucking fleas. Are you not supposed to be a team of advisors? Are you not supposed to be head of communications?!” Bianca cried, shooting Nina an icy glare. Completely unfazed, Nina clicked her pen.

“Yes, but I’m completely unable to do anything if I don’t know what we’re communicating!”

Bianca rolled her huge eyes up to the heavens, seemingly trying to cool her boiling blood. As Brooke scanned her eyes over the rest of the room, she caught Vanessa looking straight at her, her eyes a little fearful. Brooke shot her the most reassuring smile she could manage and almost gave an audible sigh of relief when Vanessa seemed to relax.

“So, you want to go out to the media and tell them that, hey! It’s not so bad, because the truth is that I’m too lazy to fill out my own fucking expenses forms, so I just gave them to one of my aides to fill out! I’m not actually keeping that close an eye on how much I’m claiming back! Do you realise how that’s going to look?” Bianca scowled, Darienne sighing and slumping into her chair.

“So what do we do?!” she asked, her voice somewhere between a whine and a plea. Brooke began to feel a bit less guilty as she rolled her eyes. She wished Darienne had a bit more backbone, a bit more of a spine. It would endear her to her a lot more. That sort of big-eyed deer act was only cute when Vanessa did it.

There was a momentary silence in which Nina clicked her pen repeatedly, looking from Darienne to Bianca, then back to Darienne.

“You have two options,” Bianca finally said, her voice much quieter than before. Turning to the other girls, she addressed them gravely. “Could you ladies give us a moment.”

Not a question, a demand. One by one, Brooke, Vanessa, Jan and Nina all filed out and wordlessly closed the door. After a heartbeat of silence, Nina sprinted over to the comms team.

“Is it happening?!” Scarlet asked, wide-eyes and open mouthed, like a child at Christmas.

“It’s happening now! It’s happening now. Two bullets in the back of the head, bang, bang!” Nina replied excitedly, her voice ringing through the offices as she mimed a brutal murder.

“Nina!” Vanessa hissed, motioning to the glass-fronted office where Bianca and Darienne were standing motionless, looking at Nina impassively. Horrified, she abruptly sat down in her seat.

“I can’t believe it’s actually going on right now. Fuck. She’s gonna hate me, ain’t she?” Vanessa worried, biting her nails. Jan slapped her hand away from her mouth.

“Stop that!” she reprimanded, Vanessa looking to the floor sheepishly. “She won’t hate you, and if she does, well, that’s politics. She’s a grown adult, she can handle it. She knew the profession she was entering into was ruthless.”

“Nobody could hate you,” Brooke added, brushing Vanessa’s cheek with her finger very slightly. “You’re like a fucking carebear. It’s impossible.”

A pink blush crept over Vanessa’s face. “You two are too sweet to me, get outta here. Hey, have we heard about a replacement?”

Brooke sighed. “I don’t know if she’s accepted it or not yet, but Bianca told me Jackie Cox is in the running.”

Jan and Vanessa’s faces both screwed up. “Who the hell is that?”

“I went to Uni with her. I didn’t even know she was in the game until Bianca told me she’d scouted her out. I still think Jiggly would be better.”

“You mean Bianca Castro?” Jan raised one eyebrow.

“Fuck, yes. Now she’s got me doing it,” Brooke sighed, further confusing the two girls.

Suddenly, there was a creak from the office door. Darienne emerged, her posture perfect and her head held high as she walked towards the three girls. Her eyes were cold, so much so that Brooke found herself shivering a little.

“Right, well. Thank you, ladies, for your unwavering support. I wish you all very long and successful careers,” she said cooly, then her face darkened. “And I hope you all get heart failure.”

“Aw Darienne, c’mon!” Vanessa pleaded as the ex-Minister marched towards the lift, a storm cloud of rage. As Darienne stepped into the lift, Yvie began whistling Another One Bites The Dust under her breath and Scarlet started laughing so hard Brooke momentarily thought she was suffocating.

Brooke started laughing too. She had to, she couldn’t help it. This pathetic, et tu, Brute? act was wearing. Jan was right, these were the rules of the damn game. People in the department had come and gone as if Dosac was a massive revolving door and Darienne had never shed a tear for them. Brooke hated the hypocrisy that was so freely batted about in politics. Mourning a departure with a simple “it’s a shame, but they had to go” and then acting like the damn Godfather when your own time came. There was no dignity in it, no class.

“Ding dong, the useless fucking bitch is dead,” Bianca deadpanned, Vanessa relaxing and giggling a little at the slightly less high-intensity Bianca.

“What happens now, then?” Brooke asked her. “Did Jackie take the job?”

“Like a trout on a hook. Barely even had to sell it to the kid. Right, here’s the line!” Bianca suddenly yelled, loud enough that Darienne could probably hear it from the ground floor. “Darienne will be giving a statement outside Number 10 in fifteen minutes. After that, all I want to hear is praise. Praise, praise, praise, Psalm one hundred and fucking one. At 12pm, you guys will have a new Minister. Nina, it’s your job to break her in. Break her fucking spine if necessary.”

Nina nodded apprehensively, unsure of how serious Bianca was.

“I’ll see you all again at half 12. Oh, and Destiny’s Child?” Bianca said, turning suddenly to address Brooke, Vanessa and Jan as she hit the button of the lift. “It won’t be necessary to clear your desks if you don’t plan on leaving.”

As Bianca left Vanessa turned excitedly to Brooke and Jan, grinning madly as she gave them a huge hug, happy at being allowed to stay.

Brooke decided she’d probably have quite literally stabbed Darienne in the back in order to have that smile flashed at her again.

***

“Ladies, I’d like to introduce your new Minister for the Department of Social Affairs and Citizenship…Jackie Cox!”

Everyone started clapping, but in equal measures scrutinising the tall girl in front of them, standing beside Nina nervously and waving hello. She hadn’t changed all that much since Brooke had last seen her. Her hair was still long, swept back into a neat pearl headband so that her dark waves fell down her back instead of over her shoulders. Her makeup was simple as it always had been: a few swipes of mascara, a dark brown eye pencil to bring out her equally dark eyes, a dusky rose shade on her lips. She was in a matching red suit jacket and tailored skirt, and had red heels on to match. Brooke’s feet were beginning to get sore in her own heels, tired from standing in line with Vanessa and Jan waiting to welcome Jackie. She didn’t have to wait much longer though as Jackie was already shaking Vanessa’s hand, smiling and gushing about how she was so honoured to take up the position and how she was so looking forward to working with her. Brooke stared at her, a little irritated with the dramatics. Jackie then moved on to Jan who was standing in the middle of the line. Brooke watched as they both looked at each other, Jan sort of open-mouthed and Jackie seemingly finding it hard to formulate words.

“You must be Janette. It’s so good to meet you,” she finally said as she shyly held out her hand. Jan took it, shaking it gently.

“It’s good to meet you too. And, uh, Jan’s fine. My friends call me Jan. Not that you’re my friend, of course, you’re my boss. But uh. You can still call me that,” Jan mumbled, her voice quiet and a little nervous and her eyes not once tearing away from Jackie’s.

“Right! Sure. I, um. I hope you’re staying on?” Jackie asked, her voice a little hopeful as she gave Jan a smile, her teeth white and dazzling.

“Absolutely. I can’t wait to start working with you! It’ll be, uh. Jan-tastic!” Jan raised her eyebrows a little as she made her joke, Jackie giving a polite laugh of her own. Brooke’s brow furrowed in confusion, the corners of her mouth turning down slightly. What the fuck was this?

“Well, I’m really excited to get started. It was so good meeting you, Jan,” Jackie smiled, giving Jan one last look as she finally tore her eyes away and faced Brooke. Her face immediately changed, taking on an awkward sort of expression as it was clear she had no idea what to say to Brooke. “Brooke Lynn! Hi! What a nice surprise! Gosh, it’s been a while!”

“Yeah, like, eight years. You look good,” Brooke replied curtly, not really instantly warming to Jackie despite her efforts.

“It’ll be nice working together. Just like at uni! I didn’t really believe it when Bianca said you were here!”

“Yeah, well. I’m just climbing the ladder. Where have you been these past few years, anyway?”

“Just the stock exchange. It was always the economic side of our degree I was more interested in, but when Bianca phoned me I thought this was a pretty unmissable opportunity!” Jackie beamed at an unimpressed Brooke. Receiving no reply, she stepped back a little awkwardly. “Anyway, it’s nice that you’re here. I’d better start my briefing, so I’ll speak with you later?”

Brooke nodded wordlessly as Jackie click-clacked away. Say ‘nice’ again, bitch, I dare you.

Vanessa tilted her head as she watched Jackie retreat, her glossy hair swaying.

“Well, I like her. I think she’s gonna be good,” she concluded, clasping her hands together. Brooke narrowed her eyes at Jan, whose gaze was still fixed on Jackie.

“Jan-tastic? What the hell was that?”

Jan gave her a funny look. “What?! You know I love a pun.”

“Not just that. What about your MP thing? You’re seriously going to pass that opportunity up?”

Jan leant back against the glass door of Darienne’s old office, gazing dreamily at nothing in particular. “Um…yeah. Yeah, I think I’ll stay on. I’m still young, I’ve got time for the whole MP endeavour in a few years’ time. No, I think I’ll stick around here for a bit longer. Things might get interesting.”

Still confused at Jan’s sudden change of heart, Brooke shook her head and shrugged. In her opinion Jan was out of her mind, but if that was her decision then that was that. As Vanessa and Jan chatted excitedly Brooke made her way back to her desk, her head kind of in a daze. A lot was happening and she didn’t really know what the next few months were going to be like. An economist in a political position wasn’t new, but she was still reserved about welcoming Jackie with open arms. Still, whatever would happen she was glad that she had Vanessa and Jan to stumble through it all with.

God, she was glad Vanessa was staying.

Looking over to the Comms team she saw that Yvie’s computer was displaying the BBC website, where a live stream of Darienne’s resignation speech was playing. Yvie was sat in her chair, Jaida crouching at her right and Scarlet at her left, Adore peering over Scarlet’s shoulder as Darienne set down her sheets of paper and walked away from the lectern set up outside Downing Street. Yvie threw her hands in the air as if she was praising God.

“The old Minister is dead,” she cried dramatically. “Long live the Minister!”

17 notes · View notes

santoteez · 5 years

Text

Let Me Teach You - Namjoon

Word Count: 2.8k

Idol: Kim Namjoon (RM) of BTS

Genre: Smut with a dash of fluff at the end, like literally a dash, you might catch it if you squint

Edited: a lil (This is another of my older writings)

Warnings: Character’s name is pronounced Ah-Deh-zay, MC is a Black female with natural hair, Daddy kink, squirting, BFF to lovers, unprotected sex (don’t do it)

Adeze cuddled further into her bed, making herself comfortable. The snow coming down outside was intense, almost blizzard-like. She had luckily stocked the kitchen not too long ago, and her company issued a building-wide alert that they would be closed for the next few days, so she was prepared for an extra-long weekend of bingeing and stuffing her face. An episode of Arrow was starting on the TV when she heard the front door. Considering she lived alone, it had to be her friend, Namjoon. Adeze and Namjoon had been friends since high school. When they were accepted to the same college, it was almost a no brainer that they both attend. They were roommates from start to finish, and after graduation, landed rather lucrative jobs. Adeze, having been a finance major, was now the CFO to a medium-sized corporation, on its way to being one of the big dogs of D.C. Namjoon on the other hand, was a head writer to The Washington Post, overlooking the rest and reporting to the editor-in-chief. Not bad for a couple of 24-year-olds.

“Leave your shoes at the door!” Adeze shouted, not moving from her spot in bed. “And bring me a lemonade from the fridge!”

“Giving me orders and you haven’t even seen me yet. What if I was a murderer?” Namjoon popped up at the doorframe with Chinese takeout and two lemonades in hand.

“All I ask is that I enjoy my lemonade before you chop my head off.” She reached for the lemonade eagerly.

“Take it easy, have you eaten a proper meal at all today?” He asked, pulling the drink out of reach.

“I had eggs this morning!”

“What have you eaten since then?”

“I may have had one or two ice cream sandwiches…and a few honey buns.”

“Exactly. Food. Eat.” He shoved a container in her waiting hands.

She groaned. “What’s in here, anyway? You might be poisoning me.”

“If I wanted to, I’d have done it years ago. It’s house special lo Mein.”

“What’s so special about it? Cyanide? Arsenic? Mercury?”

“It’s special because it was made for you. Can you act your age for once, Adeze? You need actual food.”

The dark-skinned girl rolled her eyes but obeyed nonetheless.

She opened the container, steam arising from the brown noodles. She twirled a forkful, lifting it up to her lips. She hummed happily. “You’re right, I needed real food.”

“What would you do without me? Imagine I had gone home today.” After graduation, the dynamic duo decided it was time to stop rooming together and get their own space. Their own space meant houses two blocks away. Namjoon’s house spent most time unused with him spending almost all his free time in Adeze’s.

“I know, I know. I appreciate you.” She watched as he sat next to her on bed before opening his own container.

“Is this another rerun?” He asked, eyes fixated on the screen as he bit into an egg roll.

“Yep. It’s before Oliver and Felicity got together. You know, back when they were just friends with extremely obvious feelings for each other.”

“Right. Then they finally fall in love and run off to get engaged. Must be nice.”

“Felt that. I’m gonna die a virgin.”

“What? There’s no way you’re still a virgin.” Joon turned to the curly-headed girl.

“Says who?”

“What about Chanyeol?”

Adeze shuddered. Talking about her ex is NOT how she imagined she’d be spending her evening. “I never fucked Chanyeol, thank God. Arrogant prick. He turned himself on more than I ever did. I’m surprised we even lasted six months.” The pretty boy barely ever spent time with her, and when he did, it was all about him.

“Holy shit. I just always assumed.”

“We can’t all be as experienced as you, Kim Namjoon,” Adeze said, thinking back to all the times Namjoon stumbled into their room in college with a girl on his arm late at night. It taught her to invest in quality headphones.

Namjoon smirked, rolling his eyes. “How many times do I have to apologize for College Joon? You know I’m not like that anymore.”

“The damage is done, you monster,” Adeze shouted dramatically, clutching her chest.

“Anyway, back to the conversation. I doubt you’ll die a virgin. You’ll lose it eventually.”

She scoffed. “Maybe when I’m 60. I don’t think I could trust any guy enough, anyway.”

A long silence ensued. Neither spoke, the TV the only source of sound in the room.

“I made it awkward, didn’t I?” Adeze asked.

“What? No, of course not!”

“No, I did. I put value to the whole virginity thing and I made it uncomfortable because you didn’t.”

“Dez, that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard. How you view your body and virginity is YOUR choice. Plus, that’s not what I’m thinking about.”

“Well, what ARE you thinking about?”

Namjoon sighed. “You said you want to trust the guy you lose your virginity to, right?”

Adeze nodded.

“What if that guy…was me?”

Adeze nearly snapped her neck turning to face the silver-haired boy, who was calmly eating his noodles as if he didn’t just offer his best friend sex.

“Boy, stop playing with me.” Adeze shook her head, turning to face the TV again.

“No one’s playing with you. Losing something that matters to you, to someone that matters to you. How is that a bad idea?”

“Joon, we’ve been friends for years. Best friends, at that. I don’t want sex or anything else to come between us.”

He rolled his eyes. “Dez, if my hoeish ways weren’t enough to keep you away, nothing will be. I know everything about you, and you about me.”

The girl pouted slightly. He had a point. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” She nodded in agreement.

“Great. Come here.” He said, tugging at her arm.

“Right now?!”

“When did you think it was gonna happen?”

“I don’t know, I thought this was like a conversation. A preliminary hearing before trial!”

“Ever heard of a speedy trial?” He asked, yanking the girl towards him. Adeze shouted in surprise, landing in his lap.

Adeze began to hyperventilate, never having been this close to her best friend.

“Hey,” Joon rubbed her back, sensing her uneasiness. “It’s okay, the further we go, the more comfortable you’ll get.” He leaned in to kiss her. Adeze felt frozen, unknowing of what to do. When he didn’t feel her kiss back, he pulled away, frowning.

“Why won’t you kiss me back?”

“I can’t. Chanyeol barely ever kissed me.”

“Oh my God. You don’t know how to kiss.”

Adeze immediately pushed away, embarrassed. “Get off.”

Namjoon tightened his grip on her waist. “Hey, hold on a second. I’m not trying to make fun of you. I’m just realizing how shitty of a boyfriend Chanyeol really is. I don’t care you don’t know how to kiss. In fact,” He leaned in again, “Let me teach you.”

Adeze inhaled sharply when their lips met, kissing back this time timidly. Namjoon’s hands roamed cautiously, grabbing her by the thighs and pulling her closer, deepening the kiss. His tongue danced along her bottom lip, which she hesitantly allowed to slip in. His gentle suckling on Adeze’s tongue caused a strangled moan to escape her throat, earning a smirk from Namjoon.

“It’s okay baby, let me hear you. Tell me how good it feels.” His attention moved from her lips to her neck, kissing and sucking until he reached that spot that caused her breath to hitch.

“Fuck, Joon. Right there.” She mewled, to which Namjoon hummed in satisfaction. He tugged at her tank top. “Take this off.” He said eagerly, knowing there was nothing underneath. Adeze lifted her arms almost immediately, previous hesitations and cautions suddenly out the window. The insignificant garment was yanked over her head and across the room. Namjoon’s lips continued their sinful assault, lowering to Adeze’s chest. They latched onto her left nipple while his fingers twisted and pulled on the right. Adeze’s heavy breathing a result of Joon’s tongue swirling around the chocolate-colored nub, with the occasional biting to add to the sensation.

“You ready for something else?” He said, stopping abruptly with a smirk.

“Something like what?” Adeze asked, lust evident in her voice, which shocked her. She’d never heard herself this way.

“Lie down.” Joon said, getting up.

“What are you doing?” She asked, her head hitting the pillow.

“You’ll see.” He said, grabbing the unused pillow from the headboard. He made a hand motion signaling for her to lift up her bottom half, to which she obliged. In a swift movement, he set the pillow beneath her butt and yanked her sweats down to her ankles, and off her body completely.

It finally clicked for Adeze what was happening, and she tensed up immediately, closing her legs.

Namjoon looked up at her. “What’s wrong, Dez? Talk to me, baby.” He said, planting kisses up and down her thighs.

“What’s wrong?” She laughed nervously. “I’ve never had anyone see me down there, and now you’re trying to shove your face in it.”

“It’ll feel good, though. Aren’t you tired of hearing your friends’ stories? Don’t you want to know what it’s like?” He rubbed her thighs, a mischievous look on his face. Adeze nodded, biting her lip. “I’m dying to taste you. Let me taste you, baby. Yeah?” She nodded, spreading her legs slightly. Joon smiled, kissing her inner thighs, biting them ever so lightly.

“You’re so wet for me, baby. I’ve barely even touched you. You like how Daddy’s treating you?” He asked. Dez nodded. “Tell Daddy what you want him to do.”

Adeze whined in protest. He was taking too long for her. “I can’t hear you, baby. Don’t you want this? Tell me what you need from Daddy.”

“I need Daddy to shut up and eat my pussy till I cry.”

Joon shook his head, pulling the drenched panties off her body. “Bratty as ever. I’ll have to tame that smart mouth of yours. That’ll have to be next time, though.” He lied down on his stomach, marveling at the beauty in front of him.

“Such a pretty pussy, all for me.” He said, the warmth of his breath tickling Adeze, causing her to squirm.

“Please, Daddy. I need you so bad.” She whimpered.

“Of course, baby. Especially when you asked so nicely.” He said, before sticking out his tongue, giving her pussy a long, languorous lick. Reaching her clit, he paused, giving it a hard suck.

Gripping the sheets, Adeze gasped, her legs trembling from the sudden rush of pleasure. Joon continued his assault on her clit, his teeth grazing the nub with each suck. Dez bucked her hips, causing Joon to drape his arm over her waist, pinning her to the bed. It didn’t stop the girl from squirming, though.

“Stop fucking moving.” He growled. “You said you wanted me to eat your pussy till you cry, so that’s what I’m doing.” He said, licking up and down her folds frantically. Dez arched her back, her forehead just barely missing the headboard.

“Fuck, Joonie, you gonna make me cum.” She shouted, her acrylic nails digging into his arm. Her words clearly a motivation to increase his vigor, Joon attached his lips to her clit in a tight lock, sucking as hard as he could. Dez’s eyes bolted shut as her orgasm washed over her, her legs wrapping around Joon’s neck tightly. He pushed her legs apart forcibly, kneeling on the bed. He pulled her body up along with him until only her head and shoulders remained on the bed. He spread her legs as far as they would go before shoving his tongue down her cunt.

“Ohh, shit. Shit. Shit.” Dez whined as her body trembled with oversensitivity from her first orgasm.

“Mmm, you taste so good, baby. Better than I could ever imagine.” Joon said, the vibrations of his voice sending jolts of electricity through her body.

“Shit, Joonie, I’m close again. I’m gonna cum. Fuck, it feels like I have to-.” She was interrupted by her orgasm taking over once again, but this time, spurts of clear liquid came gushing out of her, splashing everywhere.

“Damn, my baby’s a squirter. Look the mess you made.” He said, referring to his shirt, the comforter, and his chin, which was dripping with her arousal. Dez sat up, giving Joon a lustful kiss, tasting herself on his tongue.

“Fuck me already, Daddy.”

“Don’t worry, baby. Daddy plans on doing just that.” He flung his shirt off before fumbling with his belt. “Condom?” He asked, reaching for his wallet.

Dez shook her head. “On the pill. For my cramps, remember?”

He nodded. “Figured I’d ask anyway. Feels better raw, anyway.”

“I’ll never find out with you running your mouth as always.” She rolled her eyes.

“I’ll shut you up in a second.” He said, ridding himself of his boxers. Dez stared wide eyed at the pulsing member. It was large, with veins running along the shaft. The head was a light pink color, with precum leaking out the slit.

“Cock leave you speechless?” Joon raised an eyebrow, smirking. He positioned himself at her entrance before she could spit out another smart remark. He pushed the tip in slowly. Dez tensed up slightly, the discomfort of something foreign settling in.

“Are you okay?” He asked.

She nodded. “Keep going.” He nodded in response, pushing further. He fought against the urge to ram into her. “Still good?”

“Give me a minute.” She said, taking a deep breath. “Okay, go ahead.” He rocked his hips back and forth, at a steady pace, sliding out a little before filling her again

“Faster, Joonie. Fuck me harder.” She said desperately, his discomfort twisting into blissful pleasure. He nodded, sliding out fully before ramming into her with much more force. His hips meeting her with every thrust, causing Dez’s toes to curl.

“I’ve waited so long to have you like this. You’re always so calm and collected, so in control. I’ve always wanted to see you lose control.” He said, lifting a leg onto his shoulder, plowing into her even deeper.

“I’m gonna cum again. Fuck, you feel so good, Joonie.” She said, digging her nails into his arms.

“Cum on my cock, baby. Show me how good I’m making you feel.”

Adeze screamed out, eyes rolling to the back of her head. Suddenly, Namjoon flipped her over, pulling her ass up in the air.

“Joon, I don’t think I can handle another one.”

“Yes you can, baby. I know you can. One more, that’s it.” He said, ramming into her without warning. They both groaned at the contact, Joon’s thrusts nothing short of animalistic. The sound of skin meeting skin drowned out the sounds of the TV, where another episode had long started.

“Shit, Joon.” She breathed out, barely a whisper.

“Right there?” He asked, his thrusts hitting that sweet spot deep inside her.

She nodded frantically. “Yes, right fucking there. Fuck, what are you doing to me?”

“You’re getting close, I can feel it. I can feel you clenching my cock in your tight, wet cunt. You keep clenching around me like that, I’m gonna cum.” Joon said, his thrusts turning sloppy.

“Mmm, cum inside me.” She mewled.

“Yeah? Wanna be my little cum slut? Tell me.”

“I wanna be your little cum slut. Fill me up, Daddy.”

Joon wanted so badly to release, but he was stubborn. He wanted to see you unwind just one more time.

Adeze gasped as her fourth and final orgasm hit her like a truck. She shook uncontrollably as fluids spew out of her once again. The clenching from her orgasm triggered Joon’s. Ropes of white, hot cum shooting deep inside her, mixing with her arousal and oozing back out. He fell back on the bed, painfully exhausted. He smacked her on the ass playfully.

“You. Go pee. ASAP.”

She rolled her eyes. “Still bossing me around?” She asked, getting up and heading to the in-room bathroom. She used it, washing her hands before walking back into the room. She laid back in bed, where Joon laid with his eyes closed.

“Tired?” She asked teasingly.

“You have no idea.” He laughed.

“You kept saying ‘next time’ and that you’ve been ‘waiting for this’.”

He sighed, opening his eyes. “You’re that clueless, huh?”

“What do you mean?”

“I have feelings for you, Adeze. Always have. All those girls in college? I was trying not to think of you. When you dated Chanyeol, I was seething with anger. I was jealous to no end. And now that I’ve got a taste, my desire is insatiable. So yeah, there’s your answer.”

Adeze smiled. “I’ve always liked you too. I still do.”

“Do you wanna go out? With me? Not as friends?”

She nodded. “Of course I will, Oliver Queen.” She said, referring to the show still playing on the TV.

He laughed again. “Thank you, Felicity Smoak.” He kissed her, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and pulling her close.

#bts #bts smut #bts rm #kim namjoon #namjoon #namjoon x reader #kpop #kpop smut #kpop imagines

80 notes · View notes

geneshaven · 5 years

Text

Ivy Town To Star City

After watching tonight’s episode (721) I felt a deep need to go back and find some old school Olicity, back when they spent more than a couple of short scenes together. I am disappointed that they have been wasting so much time on lackluster plots and characters instead of using it to wrap up Felicity’s story and what she has brought to the show since day one.

I offer up the following story in memory of those good old times.

Oliver walked in the shadows his dreams always brought him. In them, he always had on his Green Arrow suit, his arrows quivered on his back and his bow clutched in his hand. In this particular dream, as his body twitched, stretched out in the backseat of the limo he and Felicity were driving back to Star City in, he was poised in front of the Count as he held hypodermics filled with Vertigo at Felicity’s neck. As the villain was about to thrust them into her neck, Oliver reacted with years of training and began to shoot his arrows at him. But the dream suddenly appeared to slow down and Oliver with it. It was his biggest fear, inside and outside of his dreams. He would never be fast enough. He was always afraid that he would not be there for those he loves. In this dream, he waited too long and the Count’s needles went into Felicity’s neck. Then the dream sped up again, and three arrows flew into the Count, pushing him backward and crashing through the window behind him. Oliver immediately dropped down and took Felicity into his arms. Her eyes had rolled up into her head and her body lay limp in his arms. Two tiny holes showed on her neck as if she had been kissed by a vampire…

Oliver’s body jerked awake in the backseat of the limo. He sat up straighter and looked over at Felicity. She too had dozed off. And in the shadowed light that came through the window from the passing street lamps outside, Oliver watched the beauty in her face and felt relief. He caught his breath and sat back in the leather comfort of the backseat.

He still had misgivings over the decision he and Felicity made to come back and help the team. He could not precisely put his finger on what it was, rather it was his fractured relationship with John or how Thea and Laurel seemed reluctant to ask for his help. But as they stood in the living room of Oliver and Felicity’s house, he could feel himself falling back into the old familiar darkness, a patch of himself he had, or thought he had, quenched when he lay down his bow and took Felicity’s hand instead. Those couple of months traveling the world together were the best moments Oliver had any right to deserve. He was getting in touch with the person he had always wanted to be. And Felicity was the reason he was. He felt right by her side. Happiness was always an unknown to him before he met her, but she was showing him how to embrace it. With each port of call they made, his feelings for Felicity deepened and he fell more in love with the idea of spending the rest of his life with her

Oliver reached out and put his hand over hers. Her breathing was even and calm. The warmth of her flesh washed away the remaining tendrils of his dream and he let his body reattach to the vibrations of the limo as they started to lull him back to sleep.

“I was watching you sleep,” Felicity spoke beside him. She opened her eyes and looked over at him. “Earlier. You always seem to be struggling with something in your dreams.” She took his hand into hers. “Do you ever have any that are happy?”

Oliver squeezed her hand and smiled. “Yeah, I am always happy when I get to save you in them.” He paused for a few seconds to gather his thoughts. “Felicity” he continued. “I know we talked about it and agreed it is the right thing to do, but I still don’t feel good about plunging back into the life I wanted to leave behind.”

“Oliver…”

“No, it’s okay.” He continued to smile at her. “I’m here with you. If this is important for you, I’m on board. But…what if I can’t…what if I’m not…”

“Oliver, I know you feel a little rusty after the calm of us being together back in Ivy Town. God knows it was like a dream come true for me. But there is one thing about us that will not go away. We are fighters. We came together because both of us wanted to make a difference. You can’t sit there and tell me you haven’t thought about any of that…or dreamed about it.”

Oliver sighed next to her. “Yeah…you’re right. I should have known that…how did Thea put…domestic bliss…I should have known it was all just an aberration, a momentary light shining out of the darkness.” His sarcasm was light-hearted and meant to ease the tension building between them. “Felicity, I can’t help but feel happy when I’m with you. Of course, I’ve thought of all this.” A brief image of him putting his mother’s wedding ring into the souffle he made for their dessert last night crossed his mind. Just ten more minutes, he thought. Only ten more minutes and she would now be engaged to him. It was another moment he felt he wasn’t fast enough for. “If keeping that happiness means taking occasional forays into my darkness, then so be it.” He paused again and let the smile on his face deepen. “Besides, who else is going to praise my cooking skills…nearly as impressive as my fighting skills.”

“Yeah,” Felicity agreed with his assessment. “You’re my little Master Chef. Oliver, I know you’re not one hundred percent on board with this plan. And I know the reasons why. I really don’t want to upset your life any more than it has been in the past. But we are together. We’re a team. Partners. You said it yourself. Do you remember?”

Oliver nodded. “Yeah, it was an epic apology I made to you. I still feel like an ass when I think about it and how I treated you.”

“Yes Oliver, you were an ass. But, like you always seem to do in situations like that, you find a quick solution, and your apology to me was like hitting a bull’s eye. I was happy I was your target.”

Oliver took a brief glance outside and saw his city rapidly approaching. The limo’s headlights splashed onto a sign that said Welcome to Star City, in memory of Ray Palmer. Even the memory of Felicity’s former boyfriend (something else he let happen by not trusting his feelings) could not erase the history Felicity had mentioned. She and Oliver were connected. Ever since he put that shot up laptop on her desk in Queen Consolidated’s IT department. They chose a path to walk on together. Oliver could not envision himself, could not endure what was ahead of them in Star City, without her by his side. She is the one who gives him the strength to shoot his arrows, to wipe away the stain of evil that taints their city. She is the light he aims by.

“Oliver, in case you are unsure…I’m happy. We’ve come a long way in these past few months together.” As if she was reading his thoughts, she went on. “I chose my path with you. I chose to take your hand and walk down it. Even if we have to go full vigilante again, I will always be with you afterward. And I expect some of that Master Chef food waiting for me at the end of the day.”

“Felicity,” he said as he broke his gaze from the window and shifted it back at her. “I’m happy too. We have both bled for this city, and when that happens, it’s our duty to honor it. I never understood that until after you came into my life and showed me how to separate the anger and the compassion that was at war inside me. It is going to feel good making a difference with you again.”

“Oliver…you’re a nut.” She squeezed his hand tighter. “And I love you for that. We’ve already made a difference. And I don’t mean being in this limo. You have changed so many lives. And I can’t help but feel a part of that. Us fighting together and righting wrongs is what has made the difference, on the streets and in our hearts.”

Suddenly, the remnant memories of Oliver’s dream evaporated as he let them go. He didn’t have anything to fear. He would always be on time, he would never miss his targets and he would always love Felicity.

Star City was just ahead, and Oliver and Felicity were ready for the future it held for them.

@swordandarrow @it-was-a-red-heeler @memcjo @hope-for-olicity @1106angel @folly1977

#Olicity

44 notes · View notes

huntertales · 5 years

Text

Part Three: Don’t Bite The Hand That Cursed You. (Remember the Titans S08E16)

Episode Summary: Sam, Dean and the reader are stumped when they investigate a possible zombie case where an amnesiac man, simply known as Shane, dies and then revives himself once a day. After Shane is attacked by the goddess Artemis, the reader and the Winchesters realize he’s not a zombie but instead a God, more specifically, Prometheus. Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader. Word Count: 8,819.

Previous Part | Supernatural Rewrite Masterlist

You lost the count of how many times you told the speech about things that went bump in the night. Most of the time you were telling people when they were caught in the middle or witnessed something first hand. However, dealing with a Greek God who forgot who he truly was after going through a cycle of death and revival too many times, along with a woman who just wanted to hike up a mountain with her friends—the same one he was supposed to be chained to—ended with them fighting for their lives. And spending a night together that ended with a son that Shane didn’t know about until today.

Life was strange. And things for you only got even weirder when you found Oliver inherited the same curse as his father. You had to admit this was a first one for you.

The bunker was the best place for everyone to keep your heads low and try to figure out a way to break this curse once and for all. Haley was still trying to wrap her head around everything that you told her after getting her son situated. She sat on the edge of the chair, leaning forward with a look of disbelief. You crossed your arms over your chest and watched her process everything from the table you sat on top of while Dean leaned his body against the edge of the table. Sam and Shane occupied a table, letting the woman process the reason for her son's strange health habits that couldn’t be explained.

“Okay, so Ollie’s dad is a Greek God who has been cursed to die every day by Zeus. And you guys are...ghostbusters.” Haley repeated back the information you told her in some kind of attempt to get herself to believe everything she was hearing. She felt like she could repeat it over and over again to herself and it still wouldn’t make sense. “Am I getting this right?”

“Well, you know, due to the fact that your son is currently, albeit temporarily, dead, I’m gonna let that one slide.” Dean said, not liking the remark the woman made after telling her you and the boys were hunters. You rolled your eyes and softly nudged him in the ribs with your elbow to make him focus back on the part of the conversation that mattered most.

“You have to realize this sounds crazy.” Haley felt she could be told a thousand times over about the real reason why her son was able to recover from death, but it still wasn’t sticking. It was too insane for all of this to be real.

“It’s true.” Shane said. “I didn’t believe it myself at first, but it’s the only thing that makes sense.”

“Look, the faster you wrap your head around this, the faster we can solve this problem.” You told her how it had to be, whether she liked it or not.

“Solve the problem?” I’m just not sure if I even understand the problem.” Haley admitted once more of her skepticism about this entire situation that seemed to be getting weirder.

“The sooner you do, the easier this is going to be for you and Oliver.” You said, not exactly having the luxury of time for you to help ease Haley into this new life she spent thinking was just fiction. Her child was more like his father in all the wrong ways, and if she wanted to help break this curse, she needed to get her head out of the sand.

“All right. So,” Dean got to his feet to explain the plan of action all of you needed to take in order to solve this problem once and for all. “The way we usually handle this is we summon the bastard and we work him over until he undoes whatever it is he did.”

“Summon Zeus?” Haley wasn’t sure of what she was hearing was all that correct when she found herself repeating back the information again. You nodded your head to answer her question. She did everything in her power not to smile at how ridiculous all of this sounded. “And if he doesn’t want to undo it?”

“Then we take him out.” Sam said, as if that was simple as it sounded.

“And hopefully,” Dean added on, “the curse dies along with him.”

“This can't be happening.” Haley muttered to herself, spiraling into denial from how her life managed to turn upside down in the matter of only a half of day. She got to her feet and started to slowly pace around and placed a hand against her forehead, brushing some of her hair out of the way to try and somehow tend to the headache that was starting to form. In the distance, you heard the sound of Oliver coughing, signaling he was awake. Haley took it as her cue to get out of this conversation while she still could. “This I can handle.”

Haley didn’t waste a second bolting out of here to attend to her son, leaving the four of you to talk amongst yourselves. It wasn’t a stretch for you to presume Shane was going to be on board with this plan. You decided to take it upon yourself to check up on Haley and Oliver after a minute or so passed, making you curious to see how her son was doing after his recent brush with death. You left the boys and Shane to start on the long search ahead through all the books the library on everything about Greek Gods.

You headed to the bedroom, softly knocking on the open door to announce your presence before you could startle Haley. You gave her a smile when you saw the woman sitting on the side of the bed tending to Oliver, who appeared to be very much alive from the last time you saw him, but now sleeping. It seemed dying tired the poor kid out. Your eyes wandered to the nasty head wound that was still caked with dried blood. You made a mental note of finding the first aid kit to make sure Haley took care of it before it could lead into something else.

“How’s he doing?” You curiously asked, striking up a conversation with the worried mother.

"Better." Haley replied. She turned her gaze away from her child for a moment to look over at you, she gave you a small smile from your concern on his well-being.

All though a few hours passed and Oliver was now breathing again, you knew by tomorrow the cycle would start up again if you didn’t find a way to stop this. It could have been simple as another hit to the head, maybe even choking on a piece of food. Maybe even something brutal like getting hit by a car...the possibilities were endless. Seeing a child die, no matter the way, was cruel and painful, but knowing they were doomed to suffer the same fate every day? Haley might have been dealing with this for only a couple of months, but you could see the impact it made on her. That constant worry, the constant wonder of what was going to kill her child today.

"I know this is a lot to take in all at once. It was for me after I found out many, many years ago." You decided this was the best to discuss how she was feeling right at this very moment, from all the things she heard, Haley’s head had to be spinning. You looked over at the sleeping Oliver, your lips stretching into a small frown. "Not to mention, your child being wrapped up in all of this mess, it only makes things scarier."

"I guess I got a glimpse of what I was in for after seeing it happen with...Shane. When it happened to Oliver, I knew I needed to track him down and figure out what was going on." Haley admitted. You couldn't possibly know what she was dealing with at the moment, but you were sure about the fact that you wanted to help in any way possible. Haley felt herself drifting away from the topic for a moment as her eyes did the same. She felt her lips stretch into a sort of bashful, almost kind of awkward smile. "I hate to ask this, but..."

You noticed her eyes fell right to your stomach, and the morbid curiosity to know if you were just carrying a few extra pounds, or you were in fact carrying. You answered her question when you placed a hand on your bump and nodded your head. "Four months and counting."

"How are you still apart...of all of this? It seems dangerous. Not to mention what all of you have been talking about. Don't you think it's a stupid idea to be putting yourself in that kind of danger?” Haley's questions were valid and had a point from the concern not only for yourself, the baby too. It was something in which you were used to by now. She realized how she sounded a second after the words fell from her mouth, making her suddenly regret them. You smiled slightly in a way to show her she didn't do any harm. "I'm sorry. This is all just so...new to me. You’re trying to help. Who am I to tell you what to do with your life?”

"It's okay. Seriously. I know all of this seems kind of strange. And I guess it is. Going up against a Greek God is a walk in the park compared to what I've seen over the past two months alone." You said. Haley's face changed into a sort of morbid fascination, as if she was tempted to ask what kind of other things you saw. She didn't, wanting to keep what sanity she had left when all of this was over. "I'll be honest with you, Dean and I weren't expecting kids. Kind of comes with the lifestyle. However...one night, six weeks later. Found out I was pregnant myself.”

"Yeah. I kinda freaked out when I found out I was having Oliver. All by myself." Haley admitted to you. She glanced over at her son, a small spreading across her lips at the memory of him when he was just born. Small enough to hold in her arms, seemed just like yesterday before the nightmare started. "Even if I knew what I was walking into, I'd still do it. My entire life changed when I had him. For the good."

"I've got to hand it to you. Motherhood isn't easy. My mom was a single parent. She did her damn hardest. And you did, too. Oliver seems like he turned out to be a great kid." You told her. Haley smiled at the compliment, but it only lasted for a few seconds before you saw it slowly disappear, a somber expression fell across her expression at the realization of the trouble ahead for her son. "Hey, relax. The boys and I have faced a few Gods in our time together. We even stopped the apocalypse if that makes you feel any better."

"It's just a lot to take in..." Haley started talking, admitting more to you about how she was feeling at the moment. When she finally processed what you had said, she found herself suddenly growing silent as she stared at you with a confused expression. Not sure if you were trying to pull her leg, or you were telling the truth. "Wait—did you say apocalypse?"

"Don't worry about it. That was a while ago. Focus on the future." You said, trying to make her mind focus on more important things than what you might not should have mentioned. "Figure out how things are going to be after all of this is over with."

Haley wanted to made a remark about how there might not be a future if things like this went south, but if three people managed to stop the apocalypse all by themselves maybe they had a clue of what they were doing. “I guess I should think about that, knowing that Oliver’s father’s in his life. I mean, I spent all of this time trying to find him. I just he wants to be a part of ours. I felt like I dropped a bombshell on him.”

"If it makes you feel any better, I didn't tell Dean that he was gonna be a father until just a few weeks ago. I was a nervous wreck that he wasn't going to take it well. And he did." You said. "I mean...it seems like you and him had something going on back there. Something good."

“I never forgot him after what we went through. I want him to know his son, and I want Oliver to know his father. Maybe we all can be a somewhat functional family." Haley mumbled, still trying to wrap her head around everything that was going on. "What about you? After this baby comes, are you still gonna be doing all of this?"

"I haven't really thought about that yet." You found yourself taken off guard from her question, making your brow furrow slightly from how you had to think about it. What was life going to be like when the baby was here? Hopefully no more demons, no more anxiety about the future for your child. "We're in the middle of doing something, let's just say. I'm trying to make a better future for my child. I mean, aren't we all? When that's done, hopefully soon, I guess I can be at peace. Maybe even retire and raise this kid. Try to live a normal...ish life."

Haley couldn't agree more with what you just said. Being a parent meant you'd move mountains for your children and bend over backwards, even sticking your neck out to face against Zeus. The both of you headed back to the library after making sure Oliver was sound asleep. You made your way up the few steps noticing the boys and Shane had already cracked down on research from the books all over the table. And it seemed they found something when Dean handed off a rather heavy looking book to Sam, discussing the matters among themselves.

"Hey," Dean directed his attention towards Haley when he saw her heading back and walking in sync with you by her side."How is the kid?"

“He’s fine.” She said, giving an update that everyone seemed eager to know.

"What did you guys find?" You asked, pulling out a chair for yourself to sit down next to Sam and hear what they discovered on their own. "Anything useful?"

"Dragon penis." Dean said. Out of all the things you were expecting to hear, what came out of the older Winchester's mouth was not one of them. You were a bit taken aback from the words, making a slightly confused and amused look cross your face.

"I'm sorry," You somehow managed to compose yourself long enough to hide back the smile at your natural childish reaction at what you just heard. "Did you just say dragon p—"

"Yeah. It’s a rough translation from Greek. He means Drakopoulos.” Sam told you. “He was a hunter who went after Zeus.”

"Oh, thank God." You breathed out a sigh of relief, not sure where this entire thing was going. "I thought we were gonna have to do something weird."

"Right, so, Drakopoulos tangled with Zeus back in the day," Dean jumped right back into the conversation about what he discovered before you and Haley joined. "and the Men of Letters translated his journal."

"The Men of Letters?" Shane asked, wondering what kind of title that was.

"It's a secret society. This is actually their lair. All of us are legacies." Dean couldn't help himself when he he bragged about the fancy title he inherited from his grandfather, per se. Something that was special to the three of you, but not enough to impress Haley and Shane from the looks of it. Sam stared at his brother while you raised your brow slightly, wondering if all that was necessary. Dean's smile slowly fell, suddenly feeling a bit awkward. "No big deal."

"Okay, so it says here he summoned Zeus into a trap and found a way to kill him," Sam read out aloud the information he found after skimming through the journal.

“What’s that?” You asked.

"Wood from a tree struck by lightning." Dean said.

"Frozen energy—you thinking fulgurite?" Dean wondered. Sam shrugged, thinking it made sense that it was what all of you were looking for. "All right. Nancy Drew, why don't you get on the web and see if there's any Greeks nearby that are still worshiping the old Gods."

"Already on it." You said. You got back up to your feet to find your laptop that had to be hidden underneath all the books. When you noticed it snuggled underneath one, you cautiously pulled it out to make sure you didn’t crack the screen and headed back to your seat to start your search.

"What about the wood?" Shane asked. It was the most important thing all of you needed to get if you wanted to see the God dead once and for all. "Is that easy to find?"

"With a little bit of luck." Dean said.

"Oh. Wait—this journal just ends." Haley mentioned something out of the blue. You looked up from the screen to see she had pulled over the book and began reading the translated journal entry out of curiosity. It seemed she found something unsettling. It seemed Drakopoulos never got around to updating how it all ended. "I mean, how do we know if this Drako-whatever survived? How do we know Zeus didn't get to him?"

"We don't know." Sam admitted to the woman. All of you were going into this with blind faith, hoping the lore you read about wasn't going to end up with five people being killed at the hands of a Greek God after you pissed him off.

"How do we know this is going to work?" Haley asked. She found herself losing a bit of faith in you and the boys after seeing how you worked. It wasn't efficient, it was believing in some kind of dusty old book to possibly take down the monster. All you could do was pray that the information was right and it all ended out in your favor.

"We never know for sure, but these books—they're pretty good." Dean reassured her. They haven't failed you on a hunt from the times you used them. Not yet, at least.

"So, we're hanging our lives on the writing on a dead man who..." Haley tailed off for a moment, trying her hardest not to show her slowly dwindling trust in all of you. "is named after genitalia."

“It’s a loose translation.” Dean said, as if he was trying to make this situation somehow better.

Haley scoffed underneath her breath, mumbling something underneath her breath that sounded awful sarcastic. "Experts."

"We haven't failed yet. Have a little faith in us. Because I just found one of the ingredients. Greek pagans two towns over. Best part?" You turned around the laptop you had been working on for the past few minutes to show the website of endless graves to pick from. "They have an obit page with cemeteries."

"All right. Same, Shane—you're on grave duty. Y/N, find out if there's been any recent lightning storms with trees that were struck down." Dean instructed, listing off duties for everyone to do. You nodded your head while you scribbled down an address for Sam before ripping it off the pad of paper and handing it off to the man. Dean looked over at Haley, telling her what she was going to be apart of. "You and I'll handle the B&E."

"We'll be in touch." Sam said.

The two men got up from their seats and began heading out to get the first ingredient all of you were going to need in order to conduct the ritual. Dean called out to his brother, he shoved his hand into his pocket and pulled out the keys to the Impala. Throwing it over to the younger man, Sam managed to catch the keys straight into his palm in one swift motion. As you saw his shadowy silhouette heading for the stairs, you shouted at him to be careful like always before going back to your research of trying to find a tree that was struck by lightning.

Dean headed over to the table where you and Haley were occupying, grabbing another laptop for his own tedious search for where he was going to find fulgurite. Haley watched the both of you work, finding it rather fascinating at how all of this was coming together, despite her hesitant earlier. The three of you worked together like a well oiled machine, all of you having a special part to play. And it seemed she got to be apart of breaking the law aspect from it.

"B&E? You mean breaking and entering?" Haley asked out of curiosity. “What for?"

"Well, the book calls for fulgurite. It's a little hard to come by." Dean said, explaining the more drastic behavior to get what all of you were going to need. "The last time we needed it, we stole it from a one-percenter."

"You do know that fulgurite is available in crystal shops all over, right?" Haley dropped a piece of information that was about to make your job a hell of a lot easier. Dean found himself feeling slightly embarrassed, as to why he didn’t even think to look there first. He looked over at the woman, pretending to find all of what she was saying rather interesting. "The new age people, they use it to make cheap jewelry."

You quietly chuckled to yourself from seeing how Dean realized his brilliant plan wasn’t going to be so complicated as he thought. All it took was a quick search for you to find exactly what you needed. “Good news. There just so happens to be a crystal shop in town. If you leave now you’ll be able to grab it before closing.”

Dean grabbed the piece of paper of the shop he didn't need to break into after all. You gave him a smug sort of smile and wished him luck, Haley handed off her keys to her car so he could make a quick trip. You had two of the ingredients done for the summoning spell, now you needed to focus on the most important piece of all. How to kill the bastard. That was going to be the tricky part, but with a bit of research and some news article, you happened to have found a tree that was struck down by lightning last summer. Nothing much of it was left after the storm, but you had a feeling there was just enough to spare just for you.

+ + +

Now that all of you had everything you needed to summon Zeus and make him take back his little curse, it was time to put the plan into action. You decided to hitch a ride with Haley in her minivan with Oliver in the backseat to follow behind the boys and Shane in the Impala. The ride to the location where all of this was going to take place was quiet for the most part. You were behind the wheel with Haley in the passenger seat and Oliver sleeping in the back after he nodded off an hour into the drive. Everything was somewhat calm before the storm. You took your eyes off the road for a moment to see how Haley was doing.

"Listen, I know all of this seems a little haphazard, all right?” You spoke up for the first time in a while, breaking the silence to help ease the situation she was about walk into. “But trust me when I say that the boys and I have gone in with a lot less and still came out on top."

"I believe you. It's just all this." Haley said. She didn't expect during search to find her son's father that it was going to end her learning about the supernatural world, and finding out she spent a night with a God felt like it was the cherry on top of it all. "I'm about to ask Zeus, the Greek God, to help cure my son."

"The thing you have to remember is this is not about asking for help, okay? Things like him aren’t your friend. They’re the enemy. You ask for something, they’re going to ask for something back. Trust me on this. I know from personal experience.” You muttered the last part of your sentence to yourself. However it didn’t go unnoticed by Haley, who found herself staring at you with wonder by what you meant from that. You let out a quiet sigh, adjusting your grip on the wheel. “My mom, she...she couldn’t exactly have kids. Tried and tried for years, but nothing. So she went to someone and asked for his help.”

“What kind of help?” Haley found herself asking out of curiosity.

“Would you believe me if I said that she sold her and

my dad’s soul to a demon for a kid?" You told her the truth, wondering how she was going to react and think you were lying.

“Yesterday? I would have laughed in your face. Today? It seems just about the rest of the crazy things I’ve been hearing.” Haley admitted. She didn’t exactly feel numb or comfortable with the truth about everything, it was still settling. “What happened to you?”

"Let's just say I inherited a curse from my dad. It turned me into a very bad person for a while." You turned your gaze away from the road and to Haley, admitting something to her that you rarely did unless you felt comfortable with the person. And in some kind of way, you did with Haley. Her expression faltured for a moment, a sense of nervousness crossed her face, wondering if you were about to do something. You smiled slightly in reassurance. "Don't worry. It's gone now."

Haley nodded her head, finding some relief come over her at hearing she wasn't riding in the car with a monster. You turned your attention back to the road so you could focus on following behind Dean and not get yourself lost. Haley noticed your expression settled into something that looked like it was calm, but there was a hint of something that was too hard to go unnoticed. She saw one hand fell from the wheel, and to rest on your small bump. A mother's worst fear.

"You know when I first had Oliver, I was scared out of my mind thinking I was doing something wrong. It’s natural for a parent to have that. It means you care. It’s going to be okay.” Haley thought it was her turn to be the one to comfort, as it was you who was having a fear. Not about going up against a Greek God, but the secret you didn’t tell a single soul not. Not Sam, not even Dean. The impending doom of motherhood. Along with the fear all of your worst traits were going to be inherited. She gave you a smile, the kind a mother gave to her child when they were scared. “Who knows that better you, right?��

You felt the weight in your chest that felt like it had been sitting there for weeks lift just the slightest bit. Maybe Haley was right. You had landed on your feet many times before. You beat the supposed curse that was put on you, proving that you were willing to do anything to live a happy life. You were human...good as new. And you were about to give the same ending to Oliver and his parents. You focused back on the road, ready to do anything you could to help fix this situation so it would never happen ever again. Not to Oliver, not to your child.

+ + +

It was the moment of truth; you crossed your arms over your chest while you watched Dean follow the exact same steps Drakopoulos had done in order to summon Zeus and trap him. He placed the bowl full of the two ingredients that was needed and lit a match, throwing into the bowl and backed away when a burst of flame ignited. You saw Haley flinch from the corner of your eye and Oliver stare at the sight with wide eyes. This was only the beginning of what they were about to see. reassured them to be calm as all of you backed away slowly from the trap that was supposed to keep Zeus right where you wanted him. You rang the bell, now it was time for him to show his face.

Zeus; the Greek God of the sky and thunder, king of all of Olympus was all you knew about him. You looked up slowly to the ceiling of the abandoned warehouse you were in when you noticed the lights were starting to flicker rapidly, giving you an indication that this was working. You furrowed your brow slightly when you heard the sounds of roaring thunder above you, and a few seconds later flashing bolts of lightning. The blinding light caught all of you off guard, forcing you to shield your eyes and back away even more when you noticed lightening strike out of nowhere and straight onto the trap, bringing down Zeus himself.

“Oh, come now.” Zeus didn’t seem the least bit afraid of five measly little mortals and a Greek God he punished trapping him like this. “Can’t we be civilized?”

“Well, it depends on you. All we need you to do is break a curse you put on a little kid.” Dean said, giving part of the reason why he was summoned down to earth in the first place. Zeus directed his attention to Oliver, who was huddled by his mother's side. "So, how about you say 'yes,' and we all go home?"

"Nice to see you again, Prometheus. All cleaned up." Zeus didn't seem to be in any rush to do what you asked of him, he was more preoccupied about catching up with an old face he hadn't seen in a very long time. "I've been looking for you."

“It’s gone too far, Zeus.” Shane said. “Break the curse.”

Zeus remained silent for a moment, wondering why after all this time Prometheus would come to him and beg for him to break the rightful punishment put on him. His eyes wandered away from the man, and back to Oliver, making the connection. “It’s your child who has the affliction.” You crossed your arms tighter over your chest when you saw Zeus walk towards the edge of the trap. Even though you knew he couldn't go any further, you found yourself mimicking his moves, taking a few steps until you were right next to Haley and Oliver, as if you were trying to protect them. "Interesting."

“So, what’s it gonna be? The easy way,” Dean proposed, walking to the trap. He rested his arms across his side, showing off the wooden stake made out of the tree struck by lightning. “Or we could do this the hard way.”

“Break the trap, dear man, and I’ll break the curse.” Zeus had his own offer, as if he was trying to track all of you into thinking his proposition was good to be true. You had been in this exact same situation too many times before to fall for it. He wasn’t your friend, he was the enemy that wanted what he wanted and to see all of you dead.

“No dice.” Dean said. “Fix the kid.”

“Going once…” Zeus pretended to show you that he wasn't fooling around, counting down until his offer expired and you'd be left with nothing.

“Don’t be that guy.” Dean said with annoyance in his tone at the deal the God was trying to fool him into agreeing with.

“Going twice…” Zeus went on again, waiting for one of you to crack under the pressure.

“Hey, you can rot here for all I care.” Dean told the man.

“Yes,” Zeus understood the punishment that would follow if he didn’t cooperate, and how it’d be the same for all of you if you didn’t bend a little. “and the child will continue to suffer.”

Dean pretended to think about the lose/lose situation that would be if none of you compromised. To someone like Haley, she felt giving into Zeus' demand was the only way her son was going to get free. You and the boys had been in this kind of predicament before. Dean decided to head out, knowing it was better for Zeus to have a little time out and think about what he's done. You didn't hesitate a second in turning around and heading towards the exit, letting him rot in here for long as he needed to. It was at this point when the monster began to rethink their choices. But it seemed there was a weak link in your group, someone who was desperate to put this nightmare to an end. Zeus set his eyes on Oliver's mother.

“He needs me,” He told the woman. “And you know it.”

Haley found herself remembering all the things you drilled in her head about how Zeus was the only one who could lift this curse, who could solve this problem once and for all. She seemed to forget the part where monsters aren’t your friend. Their word wasn’t their bond, it was the sweet nothings they told you to fall for their tricks. And she did, a mother who wanted nothing more than to protect her son. You found yourself stopping dead in your tracks when you heard her outburst, making you quickly look over to see what she was about to do.

You reacted on your first instinct, running like a bat out of hell in hopes you had enough time to stop Haley from making the biggest regret of her life. You saw her abandon Oliver for just a moment to head to the trap that was the only thing to keep Zeus in his place, and with the simple scrape from the heel of her shoe, it was destroyed. You managed to yank her back away from the very thing you told her not to go near. The only way this situation could be handled was to bargain with Zeus as if he was the enemy. And now you found yourself face to face with the very being, not sure how it was going to end up. Haley was focused on one thing, getting her son back to normal. Zeus had other plans tonight.

“What do you say?” The Greek God decided it was his turn to have a little fun. With a simple stomp of his foot, a burst of lightning came out of nowhere, striking down Shane and the boys, making them stumble to the ground. You tried to move your feet to somehow gain control of this situation, only to find they were planted firmly on the ground. You were stuck. "Shall we try this the hard way?"

You felt yourself exhale a sharp breath from your nose at how all of this ended up, Zeus found it all rather amusing when you caught him laughing to himself, seeing your pitiful attempt crumble at the hands of a mother who was just trying to do what was best. "Bring forth the child." Zeus commanded. Haley was hesitant to do so, as if she was starting to realize this was a mistake. A scary man with unlimited powerful was intimidating, so the God decided to add a touch of manners to help ease the tension. “Please.”

Zeus stood face to face the mother and child, thinking he had everyone right where he wanted them. He had no clue it was going to take a lot more than being thrown around for the boys to give up so easily. Your eyes wandered away from the situation that was about to unfold into a disastrous ending if somebody didn’t put a stop to it. The boys slowly got up to their feet, silently making a plan to attack Zeus when they noticed his back was tuned to them. It seemed like the perfect plan that was going to work. Neither one of you took into consideration Zeus had family of his own, who would do anything he asked.

The boys managed to get up to their feet before they found their plan foiled in the matter of seconds, and only finding out they were caught when they felt their backs roughly being thrown against a cement wall, pinning them in place. You turned your head to see who it was. The woman from the motel Sam had identified as the Greek Goddess, Artemis. You rolled your eyes in frustration at how all of this went downhill, muttering a familiar frustration out from underneath your breath you remembered Bobby used to say during times of distress. “Balls!”

“I trust you've met my daughter.” Zeus said.

“Haley, don’t do this.” You warned the woman from what she was about to do. You felt your stomach twist into knots from what was unfolding. Somehow you hoped she would remember what you said about your own mother who did anything to get what she wanted, but ended with her rotting in hell. “You aren’t going to win.”

“This is the son of Prometheus. And he’s cursed to suffer death every day.” Zeus told his daughter. Sam watched as Artemis looked over at Prometheus, with a kind of expression he wouldn’t have expected from the woman. “I must admit, I could never have conceived such a horrible fate for such a beautiful child. Just goes to show, we must all leave room for happy accidents.”

“What does that mean?” Haley asked the man, not sure if what he was saying was a little remark. Or something much more sinister. The way he was speaking was cryptic, like it could mean anything. “I don't understand.”

“Tell me, has Prometheus experienced the child's death yet? How did he take it? Did he hurt?” Zeus asked the woman all sorts of questions she nodded her head to, giving him the exact answers he wanted to hear. “Good.”

It seemed Zeus wanted to deliver Prometheus’ punishment of death himself when Shane suddenly dropped down to his knees, attempting to somehow breathe. But it was impossible from the invisible grip around his neck. Haley quickly shielded Oliver’s eyes so he wouldn’t be able to see the sight. “Imagine a thousand children all dying in unison. Only then would you understand my pain. But we can't always have what we want, so...” You felt your stomach drop when you saw him set his eyes on Oliver. “One will have to do.”

Haley suddenly realized her plan backfired right in her face when she figured out what Zeus was trying to do. She attempted to plead for him to change her mind, but she only managed to get out one measly word before she was forced into silence. Oliver had no nowhere to run when Zeus walked over to him and crouched down to the little boy’s level. Zeus looked at him like he was a special gift made just for him. A new little puppet to torture.

“I have a special job for you, my little friend.” Zeus spoke to the child in a sweet and kind tone, making him have no clue what he was about to do. This was a family matter, and it seemed the Greek God didn’t like the fact that you were giving him a deathly glare.

Zeus called over his daughter to take care of you and the boys while he dealt with Oliver and his parents. You knew better than fight your way out of this when Artemis made her way over to you and roughly yanked your arm, forcing you to start walking. You rolled your eyes in frustration and did what you were told, leading the way while she followed right behind. The boys were next to join you, and on your way you went, marching to your death. You pictured a lot of different ways your life would be cut short. You didn’t think it was going to be at the hands of a Greek Goddess, and especially not in the condition that you were in.

You let out a quiet sigh at how this night ended up for the three of you; walking to your deaths, Oliver facing the same terrible and painful fate as his father. While you and Dean were thinking of every way you could sneak your way out of this, it seemed Sam wanted you and his brother to get to know the person who was about to end your life in a very painful manner.

“So, you know who this is, guys, walking us to our deaths?” Sam asked all of you, as if you were honestly going to answer him.

“Don’t know.”

“Don’t care.”

“It's our God, Artemis—the Goddess of Hunters.” Sam said. You looked up at him and have him a sarcastic sort of expression, pretending you were even the slightest bit interested in what he had to say. Dean gave his brother a sort of stink-eye glare, not really in the mood for the brief history lesson on the goddess. “Of course, she's not really worship worthy anymore, uh, having lost a step and all.”

Artemis didn’t think the words being said about her were shining her in a flattering manner. She didn’t waste a second in making Sam regret what he said when she waved her hand, slamming the three of you straight into the wall. You managed to catch yourself just in time from getting a blow to places where you tried to avoid. You were stuck with the side of your face pressed against the cold concrete wall, at the mercy of a very pissed off Goddess. “The hell I am.”

“Really, Sam? Talk trashing a God?” You hissed at the younger man from how stupid he was being. This kind of behavior you expected out of his brother during times like this, not him. “If she doesn’t kill you, I sure as hell will.”

“Still at full power? Really?” Sam asked the Goddess, in the kind of voice that was almost mocking her. He didn’t give her a chance to answer, deciding to see how long he could push her buttons before she snapped. “Then why did it take you seven years to track down Prometheus?”

“He was hiding.” She said.

“Hiding from you? So the God of Hunters couldn't find a shack in Montana?” Sam went on, asking his questions and testing his limits. “Maybe it's that you didn't want to find him.”

Artemis decided to show all of you she was exactly who her name promised to be, a hunter who knew how to make her prey fall in line. You felt your first punishment for the night when you felt yourself being shoved even harder against the wall, making it feel like you were being pinned down by a bolder. “Keep it up, Sammy.” You gritted the words between clenched teeth. “And I’ll make sure you’ll never be able to have children.”

“Your dad’s gonna kill that kid, you know?” Sam reminded the woman about the horrible events going on on the other side of the warehouse that she was ignoring.

“Don’t worry. He’ll come back.” Artemis reassured him about the loophole that wouldn't grant such punishment to Oliver. She pulled out a dagger and stepped forward to Sam, lightly pressing the blade against his cheek to prove he was very much mortal. "Unlike you."

“He was in love with you, you know. He told us.” Sam suddenly said something unexpecting. You furrowed your brow from where he was going with this, taunting Artemis wasn’t to get under her skin, the way someone would with a secret nobody was supposed to know. She stepped away from him, mumbling that he was lying. “Okay, sure, yeah. Believe whatever you want.”

Things fell silent for a moment, long enough for all of you to hear the screams of pain coming from Shane as you knew him. To Artemis he was someone more, in a way that Sam knew how to work against her to his advantage. After a few seconds Artemis hesitantly spoke up, "What did he say to you?"

"This wasn't the first time he escape that mountain, and that you let him go for free as long as you could hide your little trystant from the old man." Sam said. It all sounded convincing, but the goddess was smart enough not to believe such a thing to come out of the man’s Shane’s condition who didn’t even know who he really was.

“The hell he said.” Artemis muttered. “His brain is mush.”

“Oh, yeah? Then how did I know? What, have you spilled it to anyone? Homor? Hesiod? Herodotus? Of course not. You were afraid Big Daddy would find out that you fell for the person he hates most in this world. Of course, when he saw the zombie article, it kind of forced your hand, and you had to come hunt him down no matter how much it hurt." Sam managed to unravel the situation as what it was, never missing a beat while explaining it back to Artemis. You had to admit you were impressed with his big brain. But what came out of his mouth took you by surprise. "You know what? Go ahead. Kill us. And let your father slaughter that boy. Over and over again. That won't leave a mark."

Artemis had shown no sort of sympathy to Oliver, thinking his curse was a loophole of torture that was better than death. But it seemed she had come to her senses, realizing she wasn't a better than her father. She was beneath him, making her powerless as Prometheus. She was at the mercy of Zeus. If she didn’t do what he wanted, who was to say he wouldn’t punish her as well? The blood of an innocent child would be on her hands if she didn't do something to take control of this situation to make it right once and for all.

Zeus warmed up his punishment on Prometheus with a psychical beating and some extra goodies to shock him back into consciousness. Now that he was in a weaken state. the God decided to take a crack at his son. He stood over Oliver, getting ready to give the child his next dose of death. But he was stopped before he could lay a single finger on Oliver, by someone he would have never expected to betray him. "This has to stop, father."

“Stop?” Zeus found his daughter standing across the way with her bow and arrow, ready to aim and shoot him if he didn’t cooperate with her demand. He didn’t seem the least bit threatened at the attempt to foil his plans. “I’m only getting started.”

“You’ve done enough.” Artemis said.

“I am doing this for us—for our kind. He is the reason we’re here and not ruling the world.” Zeus pointed a finger at Shane, blaming the God who brought light to the world of humankind. The act that doomed Gods and Goddess’ from power, and forced Protemetus to his punishment. “He’s the reason they have forgotten all about us.”

“Let them go.” Artemis demanded in a sharp tone. “All of them.”

"I am your father, and you will obey me." Zeus told his daughter, reminding her about the role that she was to play and who was in charge here. He looked away from her to focus on what he was previously doing before she barged in and talked all of this nonsense.

“You were once my father.” Artemis said. It seemed her words had caught Zeus’ attention when he found himself looking back at her, surprised at what he was hearing. “Now you’re someone else.”

Artemis set her eyes on her father and shot off the arrow, thinking it was going to hit her target. But it seemed even Zeus had his own tricks to beat death. He grabbed Shane off from the ground to use him like a human shield, letting him be the one to get hit with the arrow when it landed straight into his stomach. "I never get tired of watching you die." Zeus taunted Prometheus for the last time, promising that his curse would never stop with his bloodline. "Your boy is going on the mountain."

Zeus thought he was the one who was going to have the last laugh, not realizing that Shane would do anything to make sure that his son wouldn't have to face the same hell he had. With what little strength he had left, Shane grabbed ahold of the arrow in his stomach, shoving it further into his body, and right into Zeus—who had been standing directly behind him. You saw the look of surprise cross his face at what Shane had done, He was finally getting a taste of the punishment that was coming to him. You began to see flashes of lightning start to rapidly fly through from Zeus' body, and, without warning, a sudden bolt of light blinded you.

It took a few moments for your eyes to adjust back to normal at what you saw unfold. When you managed to, you looked forward to see that the deed was done. The curse was broken...but at the cost of a life. You let out a heavy sight at the sight of Shane lying on the ground, all of this went unnoticed by his son. Artemis made her way over to the bodies and crouched down, yanking the arrow out and throwing it to the floor.

You found it slightly odd when you saw Artemis grab her father and Shane's hands to hold them together and looked over at Haley, giving her the slightest glimpse of a smile. The action was as if she was telling the woman her son was free from the misery his father had went through. And with the generous gift, it was time for her to leave to put her father to rest. In the blink of an eye, Artemis and Zeus' body vanished into thin air.

+ + +

You had to admit, you were a little too optimistic for your own good at times. You were naive. You wanted to believe the glass was half full, there was good in people. Sometimes dark days can lead to happy endings, no bloodshed needed to fall in order for things to be okay. No matter how many times you saw it end the same exact way each time...you never learned your lesson.

You thought there was a chance things for Haley and Shane could end with the both of them raising their son like a family, the way you promised it would. Now here you sat, in the middle of the woods with Oliver, watching a fire go in the distance while the boys burned Shane’s body and Haley said her final goodbyes.

Oliver hadn't said a single word over the past day and a half that you knew him. He couldn't from the curse put on him. You made your way over to the kid and sat down on the back of the minivan, joining him for a moment. After the things that he saw tonight, you thought the kid deserved a bit of a break from all the chaos. Feel like a kid for a bit while the grown ups cleaned up the mess before going back to things, pretending like all of this didn’t happen.

"You know what? How about we go get some ice cream sundaes?" You proposed an idea that sounded like it might be fun for him and give him a chance to relax. You thought he was going to shake his head or shrug his shoulders as a response. Instead, he spoke—for the first time in the past couple of months. The sound of the kid’s voice was bittersweet.

“No. I’d like to stay.” Oliver said.

You were rather taken back at his decision, but you agreed if that's what he wanted. You gave the little kid a smile, the kind you supposed parents did when times were tough and they were trying to fool their children that everything was okay. Oliver wasn't like a normal kid. And he'd never quite be the same after the things he saw tonight. You didn't know which one made your heart break more; the fact that a child's innocence was gone. Or the curse put on him could only be broken by his father dying.

[Next Part]

Rewrite Taglist:

@deansquirreljerkwinchester @everything-i-tried-was-taken@starswirlblitz @albot-e @supernaturalismydrug @we-are-band-sexuals@angiewinchestercas@kaylinfayezink @owhatshername1 @kgbrenner @cleo-is-my-doggy@eeyore1988 @dakota-dream @lilylovelyxo@timetravelingginger@holahellohialoha @quicksilver123456@natashacamillaus @lexi-anastasia @kaylinfayezink @deanwnchstr @albot-eh@yelloweyedwriter @rashinyx2002 @shellybeans @icantfindacreativeurl@becs-bunker @oreosatmidnight @bands-and-shietz @fabulousmustachesonapolarbear @clarewinchester @releasethekracko@alex-zeppelin @mega-mrs-dean-winchester@theskytraveler @notmoose94 @assassinofmasyaf@caswinchester2000 @savannah-m-99 @sunlight-dean @strayrosesbloom@that-slytherin-over-there @1000roughdrafts @its-medeanwinchester @simplyhemmings

Message me if you would like to be added!

28 notes · View notes

olicitysecretsanta · 5 years

Text

Home for Christmas (You can count on me)

Rated: PG-13 for implied sexy times.

For @trueromantic1 who is enjoying Season 7 and loves Felicity being a Mom to William. This is more of an Oliver-centric canon fic but there is lots of William-Felicity bonding and Oliver-William bonding!

Summary: William is finally coming home from Cambridge and even though Oliver and Felicity have patched things up in time for the holidays, Oliver struggles to reconnect with William after prison. A series of holiday themed moments as the Smoak-Queen family adjusts to their new lives. Mostly fluff with a hint of angst.

December 13th

“You don’t think he’s going to be embarrassed by us do you? Maybe we went a little overboard with the balloons,” Felicity pondered as she untangled the gaggle of red and gold balloons in her hands, just nearly avoiding hitting another woman waiting outside the airport security checkpoint.

“We’re just excited to see him. I’m sure we’re not embarrassing,” Oliver replied, shifting the huge sign that read “Welcome Home William!” as a stream of passengers exited the terminal, trying to peer around them for their son.

“Yeah, because teenage boys aren’t known for being embarrassed by their parents,”

“I’m sure the pile of Christmas and Hanukkah presents under the tree will make up for it. You can barely walk from the front door to the kitchen without tripping over presents. What was in the big silver box anyway?” Oliver had been subtly trying to find out what Felicity had bought for William all week, slightly worried that her gifts would be better.

William’s first Christmas after Samantha had died had been hard and this year Oliver felt like he had a lot to make up for after being in prison for six months and sending his family into witness protection. Plus William was so different from him at that age it was hard to guess what he would enjoy. But the latest video game console sitting under the tree at home seemed like a safe bet.

“Oh! Cisco was able to hook me up with a prototype drone! Don’t worry, all of the dangerous stuff has been removed but it’s still better than any of the commercial drones on the market,”

“A drone? Damn, that is a good gift, why didn’t I think of that,” He might have to go back to the drawing board and hope he could get another gift before Christmas, Oliver mused before his thoughts were interrupted by a shout.

“Dad! Felicity!” Oliver was sure William had grown at least a few inches as the teen appeared through the crowd.

“Will!

“Hey buddy, we missed you so much!” The signed was abandoned on the floor and one of the balloons floated away to airport ceiling as both adults wrapped their arms around the teen.

“I missed you too, don’t cry dad,” William mumbled against Oliver’s chest.

“It’s been so long since I’ve seen you,” Oliver replied through watery eyes. “But I thought I’d start making up for lost time by getting pizza for dinner from your favorite place,” finally releasing a bashful looking William.

“Yes! And maybe after we can watch the new season of Doctor Who. Felicity introduced it to me while we were in Hope Springs and I finished catching up but I wanted to watch the new season together!”

“Aww Will, you’re the best binge watching buddy ever. Of course I waited! We can start the first episode tonight,” even Felicity was brushing away a few tears as she swung her arm around Will’s (she could swear) broader shoulders.

“Doctor Who? He’s the space detective one right?”

“He’s a Time Lord, Dad,” William rolled his eyes but Oliver couldn’t be happier, just glad to see this sign of normal teenage behavior in person. Maybe he was a little jealous that William and Felicity had another interest in common but he brushed it off.

They were under witness protection for five months, of course they were going to bond even more. But he was back home now and he’d reconnect with William soon enough.

Let the bonding begin.

December 18th

The Smoak-Queen family had quickly fallen into a routine and Oliver couldn’t remember the last time he had been this happy. William was settling into the new apartment and Oliver had specifically told Dinah that he wouldn’t be pursuing the new Green Arrow until after New Years so he could spend some quality time with his family.

And Oliver was not looking forward to William going back to school. He would miss sleeping in and then cooking a late breakfast for the three of them. After breakfast they would have family time, going ice skating or to a museum. William and Felicity would keep up a running stream of commentary on whatever scientific or historical exhibit they saw and Oliver was happy to listen to the two of them.

After lunch, they would relax at home or go out to a movie. Today, William had enlisted Felicity to go to the mall for some gifts while Oliver prepared pot roast, William’s favorite home cooked meal.

He was just pulling some homemade rolls out of the oven when Felicity’s new security system alerted him to the two coming off the elevator towards the apartment. Soon they were pushing open the door weighed down with various bags.

“Hey guys, you’re just in time. Pot roast is almost ready,”

“Oh. Sounds great, Dad,” William responded but Oliver caught the subdued tone and disappointed expression on his face.

“What is it, I thought you loved my pot roast?”

“I do! I just thought it was mac and cheese night. It’s Tuesday,” William turned to Felicity as she was adding a few more boxes to the Mount Everest size pile of presents. “You didn’t tell him about mac and cheese night?”

“OK, what’s mac and cheese night?”

“It’s just a tradition we had in Hope Springs. I learned how to make it from scratch so it’s not as unhealthy as it sounds. We knew you would disapprove so we would add different toppings like avocado or salsa.” Felicity explained, looking a little guilty.

But Oliver was touched, if not a little jealous, by this bit of domesticity that his wife and son had shared.

“Well the pot roast will keep for tomorrow night. Why don’t you two show me how to make this famous mac and cheese,” Oliver relented easily as he turned off the oven and moved toward the fridge. He couldn’t help smiling widely at the loud cheers before they both threw their arms around him.

December 20th

The menorah had been lit and the sufganiyot and latkes been eaten. The three had spent a nice evening with a movie marathon after dinner before sending William off to bed when he couldn’t keep his eyes open anymore.

Now Oliver was enjoying cuddling with his wife on the couch, surrounded by gold foil wrappers from chocolate coins and empty popcorn bowls. Oliver was happy that Felicity was sharing his Jewish heritage with his son but this time of year had been hard ever since he came back from the island.

Of course Felicity picked up on his mood. “Hey, whats with the sad face?”

Oliver smoothed his hands down her back to reassure her. “Missing Thea and thinking about my parents. William would have loved to see the mansion at Christmas. Thea and I used to race to see you could finish candy canes the fastest.”

Felicity shifted so she was sitting up and could look at him properly. “I’m sure Thea misses you too. Do you want to go by your parents graves after we take William to Samantha’s this weekend?”

“That’s a good idea. But I still don’t know if I’m ready. My mom loved us more than anything but I’m still angry at her for keeping William a secret from me. I missed out on so many Christmases and William’s been distant ever since he got home. I don’t know if it’s because he misses Samantha or if he’s still mad at me for going away,”

They had talked about his conflicting feelings towards Moira in the past and that just made the holiday even harder for him.

“Well, Moira and I didn’t have the best relationship either but I’m sure she kept an eye on William. Besides, Christmas is about family and being together. We’re both happy you’re home,” she responded pointedly and poking a finger in his ches..

“Hey, I promised I’m not leaving you ever again,” he told her with a kiss to take away her pout. “It was my decision to go to prison, I just didn’t realize how hard it would be to earn his trust back again,”

“He’ll come around just like I did. And we can make our own traditions as a family,” said in between laying kisses down his throat. “We can start with you making love to me under these Christmas lights,”

Oliver hummed at the sensation. “But what if William wakes up?”

“Oh, I put some up in the bedroom too,” she replied with a twinkle in her eyes and a shriek as Oliver lifted her into his arms and practically sprinted towards the bedroom.

December 24th

After his talk with Felicity, Oliver had thrown himself into every holiday activity he could think of, determined to make some new traditions with his family. That’s why the kitchen was currently covered in flour and all of the materials for gingerbread houses. He and William were attempting to build a gingerbread village but it was really a thinly veiled attempt by Oliver to get some more one on one time with William.

“So aside from your classes, I haven’t heard much about Cambridge. Did you like it there?”

“Cambridge was cool. I’ve never been to the East Coast before. Felicity said we could visit colleges there sometime,” he replied absently, his focus on creating a moat around a gingerbread mansion.

William and Felicity might be thinking about colleges but Oliver was definitely not ready to think about the boy going off to college yet. “Maybe in a few years, buddy. Did you make any friends at boarding school?”

“Not really. It’s hard to make friends when you’re living under a fake name and a crime lord is trying to hunt down your family.”

“True,” he admitted. “So there were no cute girls there…or boys?”

Williams eyes widened a bit and he paused. Bingo.

Oliver knew from experience as a teenage boy it was best not to push. And William was shyer than he was at that age and he didn’t want to embarrass his son and risk missing this opportunity to hear more.

“Well…not in Cambridge… but there was someone in Hope Springs…” William ventured tentatively.

“Oh?” The best strategy when you wanted someone to talk was to let them fill the silence.

“H-he was in my art class, he was an exchange student from England and really good at drawing.”

“Ah, artsy types are always very mysterious. So, did anything…,”

“No!” he denied quickly, maybe a little too quickly. “Besides, after Diaz broke in we left so suddenly…”

“I’m sorry son,” Oliver tried to play it cool concentrating on placing gumdrops on the roof of a gingerbread cottage. But internally he was fist pumping and celebrating that William had confided this small but major bit of information in him. Progress!

“Hey, we should take a family vacation to London this summer. My parents took Thea and me when I was about your age,”

“Really?! That would be so cool dad!”

“It’s a plan then.”

After sending William off to his room to clean up Oliver cornered Felicity in their bedroom.

“Felicity!” Oliver rounded on her as she was lounging in bed focused intently on her tablet. “Why didn’t you tell me about the boy?! I knew I missed a lot in prison but this is a big thing you should have told me about!”

She pulled her eyes from the screen to look up her husband who had a streak of flour on his forehead and a giddy look on his face. She frowned. “Oliver, I have no idea what you’re talking about. What boy?”

“They boy William had a crush on in Hope Springs! Wait. He didn’t tell you?” This was even better!

“Will had a crush on someone? No he didn’t say anything about it to me,” Felicity pouted a bit.

“Yes!” Oliver really fist pumped this time.

“Oliver! I’m happy that the two of you bonding but it’s not nice to gloat,”

“Sorry hon, I just got a little over excited that he felt comfortable enough to come out to me,”

Felicity caressed his face (no more beard thank goodness) but looked a bit troubled. “You don’t think he was afraid to tell me do you? This is not good Oliver, I thought William and I understood each other,”

“I’m sure that’s not the reason. He probably just needed some time. I’m sure he would have told you eventually,” he replied pulling her into a hug.

“You’re right, I’m happy he trusted you with this,” she shrugged off her worries before taking advantage for the moment of privacy to kiss her husband.

“Dad? Felicity? You’re not being gross right now are you?”

They pulled away just as William pushed the door open, holding a DVD in one hand.

“Hey Will, what’cha got there?”

“Die Hard. We watched it last year on Christmas Eve. Should I go put it on?”

“It is your Dads favorite,” Felicity covered for Oliver who looked calm but who she could tell was internally freaking out with happiness again.

“Die Hard is the best Christmas movie and a Queen family tradition. You start it up and we’ll get the popcorn,” he motioned toward the door, before pulling Felicity back into his chest as William disappeared to the living room.

“You were right. We just needed to start some new traditions,” he said with a peck to her lips. Oliver knew he was still slowly building back the trust that he had lost but tonight was Christmas Eve and his family was together and starting their own traditions.

“Mmmm, my three favorite words,” she replied impishly. “I think I deserve another gift tonight after William goes to bed,” her words were innocent but the heated look she gave him clued him into what kind of gift she was talking about. Oliver’s response was a heated kiss that caused them both to forget what they were supposed to be doing.

“Dad! Felicity! I know you’re being gross in there!”

“Coming Will!”

“We’ll be right there!” They replied smiling dopily at each other before finally making their way out of the bedroom. Oliver sighed contentedly, taking in the sight of the presents under the tree, the menorah, and his wife and son on the couch as the title credits for Die Hard came on.

Oliver was finally home and he couldn’t be happier

#arrow #olicity #olicity fic #olicity secret santa 2018 #submission

31 notes · View notes

arrowdaily · 6 years

Link

Executive producer Beth Schwartz breaks down what those premiere flashforwards mean for the future of the series, plus other crucial season 7 information.

Those flashforwards: Viewers were left reeling when the end of the Arrow season 7 premiere revealed that those island “flashback” scenes throughout the episode were actually flashforwards. Taking place twenty years in the future, Oliver Queen’s (Stephen Amell) now grown son William (Ben Lewis) journeyed to Lian Yu to link up with a now middle-aged Roy Harper (Colton Haynes) for a mysterious reason that will be explored throughout the entire season (and future seasons as well).

“I’ve been on the show since the beginning and we had always in the room discussed the possibility when the flashbacks ended that we would do the flashforwards,” executive producer Beth Schwartz tells The Hollywood Reporter. “Especially since we knew about William and we thought that would be really cool to see how he’s been affected by his childhood and his father. We always wanted to do something like that and then this season I pitched it to Greg [Berlanti] and he was like, ‘Yes!’ We knew we wanted something fresh and new for season 7 and my favorite part of the show was always the flashbacks and the mystery of how Oliver became the Green Arrow and his origin story.”

While Schwartz doesn’t remember which writer or producer originally came up with the flashforward idea in the early days of Arrow, it was set in the core mythology of the series years ago. “It was when we realized this show might go on beyond five seasons, and I know that Marc [Guggenheim] had always said the flashbacks were five years,” she adds. “What do we do after five seasons? It just made sense to go forward into the future instead of continuing flashbacks. We’re kind of breaking two shows. We have a whole separate mythology for the flashforwards, and we have a lot of new characters, and that’s why it feels so fresh; we’re doing two shows in one.”

The flashforwards will not be in every episode, but they will be in most. “When we had flashbacks in every episode, sometimes it felt like a little too much,” Schwartz says. “I wanted to make sure that we were telling the story we needed to tell instead of being forced to tell them in every episode. With the flashforwards, we’re able to see the consequences of what our team has done in the present day story. In the future storyline you’re going to be able to see were vigilantes effective? How did that affect Star City in the future? How did it affect the Glades? How did it affect all the characters we love? Are people going to be the same or different? It opens up the world a lot.”

And for those keeping track, while Lian Yu was blown up by Adrian Chase (Josh Segarra) in the season 5 finale, it wasn’t completely destroyed. “We definitely talked about that,” Schwartz says with a laugh. "He blew up the island but he didn't decimate it. We figured that twenty years in the future, life finds its way back on the island so that’s why we had some greenery having grown over the graves. And he just didn't burn Robert Queen’s grave.”

Key changes: Aside from the game-changing addition of flashforwards, season 7 is a new chapter for Arrow as Oliver Queen is now behind bars. Don’t expect to see him freed from prison anytime soon as the show doubles down on the creative choices made in the season 6 finale when he outed himself as the Green Arrow and chose to turn himself in to the FBI.

“I love the prison story and it’s what separates it from the previous seasons,” Schwartz says. “Oliver is away from his team, away from his wife and child and he’s with some old characters and some new characters. This allows us to tell a different kind of narrative. He’s not the Green Arrow anymore. I always wanted it to be a longer arc—I loved Prison Break and I thought it was such a great opportunity to see how our hero reacts to being in prison. There is so much story to be told there so it’s a longer arc and the studio and network were extremely supportive. It’s one of the strongest stories we have, at least in the first half of the season.”

Larger theme: The overall theme this season is redemption, and that doesn’t just apply to Oliver serving time for crimes he committed as the Green Arrow.

“It's focused on Oliver but it will hit on all the characters, just in the choices they’ve made this season by becoming a hero in a different way,” Schwartz says. “It affects Laurel/Black Siren [Katie Cassidy], she has a large way to go to redeem herself from last season. It will even affect some of our characters in the future story as well.”

New villain: For the first time in history, Arrow is keeping the same villain around for a second season as Diaz aka the Dragon (Kirk Acevedo) will continue to hunt the separated Team Arrow out of revenge for destroying his empire last season.

“It is the first time we’ve done this and it’s the first time we’ve had a big bad going after our team while Oliver is in prison,” Schwartz says. “Oliver is very much isolated on the inside and he’ll struggle with trying to go after Diaz while he’s stuck in prison so he’ll have to get creative. Our team on the outside isn’t really a team anymore either so having them trying to figure out their new normal and take down Diaz is also very challenging so they’ll have to do things in a different way than they’ve done before.”

And with the addition of the Longbow Hunters, taking down Diaz will prove to be a lot harder than they all think. “Diaz will be their leader, so he’ll have this fierce group of assassins that are on his side for him to fight the team with,” Schwartz adds.

New main character: Colton Haynes returned to Arrow as a series regular once more this season, but in a surprise twist, he’s playing an older version of his original character in the flashforwards after riding off into the sunset with Thea (Willa Holland) last season in what was supposed to be his happily-ever-after send-off.

“You'll see a lot more in episode 2 that he’s much darker,” Schwartz says of the twenty-years-older, Lian-Yu-resident Roy. “He’s definitely been burned. There will be a lot of mysteries to reveal throughout the season about what happened to him in that time span. We don’t like the happily-ever-afters, apparently.”

And now that the adult version of William has found Roy on Lian Yu, expect to learn more about why he’s sought out his father’s first protege and what’s happened to him over the past twenty years as he and Roy develop a mentor/mentee relationship. “Last year we spent a lot of time with Oliver as a father, and those stories were extremely dynamic,” Schwartz says. “Trying to figure out what it’s like for a child to have a father who is Oliver Queen has been endless with the amount of stories we can come up with. How that affects a small child with all the trauma he’s been through, it’s interesting to see how William turns out when he’s an adult.”

The future: As Schwartz takes over the reins of the series from former showrunners Guggenheim and Wendy Mericle, she’s bringing six years of experience as an Arrow writer with her to shape the show as it begins its next chapter.

“What I brought [to this season with my promotion] is extremely collaborative,” Schwartz says. “I've known a lot of these people for a long time. I’m just focusing on season 7 right now but with the flashforwards, it feels like now the stories are endless. There’s a lot of material.”

Fun fact: While Shadowhunters star Katherine McNamara was previously reported as a new cast member for this season of Arrow, not much is known about her role, even after the season 7 premiere. Schwartz wants to keep most of the details about Maya, a skilled street fighter in Star City, secret but promises that the character will debut soon. “We’ll see her in the first half of the season,” she reveals. “There are still many surprises to come.”

#beth schwartz #s7 #interviews #news

27 notes · View notes

frasier-crane-style · 5 years

Text

Elseworlds

Well, Tumblr isn’t dead yet and the CW-DC just did a big crossover, so I think it’s time to make fun of the CW........ for the last time.

Did you know Tim Allen actually ended Home Improvement after season 8 because he knew the show couldn’t maintain its level of quality and was on the way downhill? Tim Allen has more creative integrity than anyone involved in the making of Supernatural. Think about that.

Anyhoo, lots to digest! Largely, this crossover felt to me weirdly lackluster and obligatory, like the whole thing was just a trailer for the oncoming Crisis on Infinite Earths crossover. It just felt unambitious, which is the last thing an ‘event’ like this should feel like. In fact, it felt a little like I imagine the result would be of filming a bunch of people playing DC Universe Online. We visit Smallville and see Lois Lane! We go to Gotham and meet Batman...’s cousin, and fight a breakout at Arkham Asylum, complete with Mr. Freeze...’s gun and the Scarecrow...’s fear gas. Then, we wrap the whole thing up with an Evil Superman, because God knows, DC never gets bored of that.

-Petty nitpick department: Batwoman just standing around on rooftops looks weird. Not only does it give the odd impression that she’s spent the entire time between episodes just, uh, standing, but c’mon--you’re supposed to crouch. Or at least hunch. Everybody knows that!

-Weirdly missed opportunity to have Ollie do the Flash narration, considering all the other opening narrations are futzed with.

-The whole thing is pretty much a glorified body swap--Stephen Amell is playing Barry Allen and vice versa. I can see how TPTB would be too pressed for time to explain a whole ‘nother continuity where Barry Allen became Green Arrow and Oliver Queen became the Flash, but still, it’s not as much fun.

-They also wholeheartedly borrow the thing of Ollie having to be happy to use Barry’s powers and Barry having to be mad to use Ollie’s ‘powers’ from the episode of Teen Titans where Raven and Starfire switched bodies. So, I guess, congratulations on making the central plot point of your crossover the same as a half-hour episode of a children’s cartoon.

-Remember that time Barry was too happy and too confident in his abilities, so his dad died?

-They got a good actress to play the Lois Lane to this Clark Kent, considering they both just look kinda awkward? His chin looks like he had a face transplant done and her nose looks like someone is constantly Photoshopping it.

NHHHA, He-Man!!

-Don’t do a callback to Smallville, show. Oliver Queen has now spent more time in costume as the Flash than Tom Welling did as Superman.

-Direct fucking hit when Oliver said that Barry couldn’t take a crap without getting a peptalk from his team, but on the other hand, Oliver can’t take a crap without Felicity wondering what it means for their relationship. “Oliver didn’t tell me he needed to go to the bathroom! Why wouldn’t he trust me?”

-I’m just saying, last season on Agents of SHIELD, pretty much every character was in a relationship--there was not so much damn drama. It’s a fucking body-swap plotline, guys. You don’t need to treat it like it could lead to someone’s divorce! Really, at this point, if you’re in a relationship with a crazy superhero, you should be used to it.

-(Although I suppose I’m a little hard to please here, since over on Legends of Tomorrow they suddenly expect us to care about Constantine rescuing the love of his life when we’ve seen their relationship for all of four seconds. But hey, like I said, Agents of SHIELD manages a happy medium and finds time for Ghost Rider to show up.)

-For the post-apocalyptic hellscape they make Gotham out to be, the police respond awfully fast to disturbances.

-”We’re on the corner of Burton and Nolan!” Groooooan.

-Ruby Rose, everyone: the Less Convincing Michelle Rodriguez. It’d probably a bad sign for how compelling Kate Kane is as a character that everyone would rather talk about where Batman is and why Batman would leave. And, speaking as someone who both watched Birds of Prey and The Dark Knight Rises--Rocky, that ‘Batman Retires’ plot point never works!

-(Is Batwoman even that popular a character to get her own spin-off? I suppose she’s ‘TV show’ popular, but still--I think she’s one of those Batfamily members that is somewhere behind Alfred but ahead of Ace, right next to Azrael. And I do think it’s hilarious that TPTB were insistent on casting a real, authentic lesbian!!!--and then immediately got complaints that they didn’t cast a Jew. Oh, Ziggy, will you ever win?)

-I don’t want to be too hard on Ruby Rose here. Yes, she doesn’t showcase anything other than one mode: Snide And Slightly Pouty (Stephen Amell ain’t winning no Oscars, but he can differentiate between Ollie As A Civilian and Ollie In A Halloween Costume). But the writing does her no favors in making a case for this character as being deserving of any amount of screentime, besides the fact that she dresses like Batman, the guy we really care about. She’s a heroine, as are featured variously in every Arrowverse show. She’s queer, as is Alex Danvers, Sara Lance, John Constantine, et al. She’s rich to the point of having unlimited resources, as are (sometimes) Oliver Queen, Barry Allen, Kara through her billionaire friends. She lives in a crime-ridden hellhole, as Ollie has done for several seasons. What makes any of this compelling? The Gotham setting? Arrow has already turned itself into an effective facsimile of that, to the point of having Ra’s al Ghul show up to make Queen into his son-in-law. Arkham Asylum seems completely generic, as does Wayne Tower. It’s all just a different part of Vancouver; who cares?

-Likewise, Supergirl, speaking to you as a TV show--you really should either be adamant that Kara is heterosexual or give her a weirdly flirtatious scene with Batwoman, but not both. I know you need, need, need to let the audience know Batwoman is a lesbian...

Pictured: The CW subtly letting you know about a character’s minority status.

But c’mon. We’ve been over this.

-Speaking of minority status, maybe it’s not the best idea to let slip that John Diggle is an AU John Stewart. Yes, there’s ten brothas in the DC Universe, and four of them are actually the other six. There are so few Negros on Earth-1 that they had to make Barack Obama into a superhero. The Batfamily has two black folks and they’re both related to Lucius Fox. There’s so few black people in Metropolis that Black Lightning knows who his father is!

Folks, the DC Universe is so white, the Black Lanterns are all dead. The DC Universe is so white, they don’t even have black Kryptonite. The DC Universe is so white, even Black Condor is a honky. The DC Universe is so white, they don’t even need a Justice League of Africa, they just have a Batman of Africa! The DC Universe is so white, the blackest guy on the Justice League is a refrigerator with one-half of a brother’s face on top of it. The DC Universe is so white, they named the black woman on the Teen Titans after a bug that’s half yellow! Now Milestone, the Milestone Universe is black. It’s so black, Aquaman is the most powerful superhero there, because he’s the only one who can swim!

(-I’m planning on being chased off of Tumblr like Indiana Jones after he snags an ancient artifact.)

-Would it be that hard for them to go to Arkham and run into the Ventriloquist or Orca or someone memorable, so long as they have access to the Batman toy chest? We got, uhh, Lady Who Can Pick Up Gun and Psycho Pirate I Guess? Like I said, unambitious. Wouldn’t it be so much cooler if they got someone from Gotham to film just one little cameo?

-Also, considering the sex scandal these shows have had, maybe it’s not the best idea to joke about their EPs being depraved maniacs? (Was Guggenheim the one who actually got MeToo’d? Because if so, Dude--Not Funny)

-The show had to character-shill Batwoman so hard that Ollie and Barry stopped being fear-gassed just to reiterate that she is too an interesting character in her own right! (If the characters have all heard of Batman, wouldn’t they have heard of Batwoman too if she’s been an active vigilante more recently?)

-But who cares about four unstoppable superheroes teaming up when we can find out how Felicity feels about her relationship? Just a thought--if you fight with your SO all the time about nearly everything, maybe you shouldn’t be in a relationship.

-Long story short, Doctor Destiny rewrites reality again to make Barry, Oliver, and Kara into supervillains in a world where he’s the hero. He also makes the other characters into pointless cameos, and weirdly gets criticized by Kara for... not giving himself a sex-change operation by becoming Superman instead of Supergirl? He doesn’t have gender dysphoria, Supergirl. I thought she was all about trans issues this season?

-Like, I don’t know, if a woman used a magic lamp to wish herself President, would anyone criticize her making herself a lady President instead of a man President?

-I guess it wouldn’t be Supergirl unless they crowbarred in an extremely awkward girlpower message where Superman and Lois agree that Supergirl/women in general are more useful than men, despite the fact that all Supergirl did was the exact same thing as Barry, while Superman and Oliver fought Dr. Destiny, and all Lois did was call in a bunch of men as reinforcements and then need to be rescued.

-But like I said about being unambitious--wouldn’t it be fun to see our heroes be forced to team up with a few supervillains to save the day? Instead, we just have Cisco playing a villain (something he’s done numerous times before). They get his help, have a weirdly poor showing in a fight against Jimmy Olsen, get Superman’s help again, yadda yadda.

-We also get Superman proposing to Lois Lane. Yeah, considering they’ve been in a relationship at least since Supergirl Season 1, she’s carrying his child, and they’re planning to move to an alien world together, yeah, I should think so? I know Superman probably isn’t a Republican, but does anyone think he’d be so blase about putting a ring on it? Hell, if nothing else, he should want to tie the knot before Ma or Pa bite it. Couldn’t they have just made it that he wants to renew his vows with Lois in a Kryptonian ceremony or some such?

#dc comics #arrow #supergirl #the flash #elseworlds

11 notes · View notes

douxreviews · 5 years

Text

Arrow - ‘My Name is Emiko Queen' Review

“I’m not Oliver Queen.”

While that quote is true in the strictest sense, Emiko Queen is doing a damn good imitation.

From the cold open it was obvious The Powers That Be were going for an OG Arrow esthetic. From the voiceover, and (camera) shot selection to the little book of names, and a wounded Emiko going to Rene for help as Oliver went to Felicity. The similarities didn’t end there. She has just as many trust issues as Oliver and a stubbornness that up till now I had associated more with Moira’s side of the family.

There is one profound difference between Emiko and her half-brother. Where Oliver sought to bring justice to the people his father had wronged, Emiko wants justice on behalf of the wrongs done to her. This is neither surprising nor unexpected. Oliver grew up with every advantage. His time in “hell” taught him humility and gave him an appreciation for those without silver spoons. Emiko grew up with little except the unconditional love of her mother. Her loss would drive anyone to desire vengeance.

That is what we are talking about here. For all Emiko’s talk of justice, her war on crime in The Glades is not born out of benevolence. She has systematically eliminated everyone who had a hand in her mother’s death as she searches for the person who pulled the trigger. She can wrap it up in as much talk of the downtrodden as she likes. Revenge is not justice. I'm not judging. I'm just stating facts.

That knowledge aside we are left with a host of unanswered questions. Chief among them why would a woman abandoned and forgotten by her wealthy father imitate her half-brother? Unlike Oliver, she’d always known about the existence of her half-sibling and the “other” Queen family. And considering Oliver’s checkered past, he seems an odd choice for emulation. And how? I can see her learning to defend herself out of the necessity of growing up in a rough neighborhood. But I can’t imagine archery being her weapon of choice.

Oliver must come to grips with the fact that the latest person to don the Hood does so out of more than just admiration. Even after all the suspect deeds committed by Mama and Papa Queen, this is a new low. To know his father severed all ties to his own daughter makes Oliver question all of his father’s motives. Especially when he did so while knowingly raising another man’s daughter as his own. Although I doubt that realization has hit Oliver yet. Moira’s behavior is just as bad. It’s not surprising she resented Robert’s other family. But the idea she would go out of her way to ensure that Robert’s child was not only discarded like an old toy but deliberately kept poor is unbelievably spiteful. So why is most of Oliver’s anger directed at his father even after Felicity and by extension the writers repeatedly lay the blame for Emiko’s abandonment at both Robert and Moira’s feet?

Speaking of marriage issues, what is up with Diggle? After years of questioning Lyla’s morality, in large part due to her involvement with the “Ghost Initiative” AKA The Suicide Squad, he unilaterally decides to bring it back? And to force Lyla to defend a policy he knows she disagrees with is unlike him. Is his hatred of Diaz that intense or is his moral fiber fraying? Does Dig really believe Diaz will flush out Dante. And is that be before or after Oliver and Felicity find out that Diaz is alive and “free.”

While Diggle’s motives may not be clear, we clarified a few unresolved issues. Deputy Director Bell is indeed subordinate to Lyla. However, her superiors at The Pentagon have appointed him as their watchdog which not only explains his apparent autonomy but also the deference that both husband and wife have been giving him. It also explained Ben Turner’s appearance in Slabside. He saves Lyla’s life at the risk of getting his head blown off and she repays him by scrubbing The Suicide Squad and sending him to a Supermax prison. No wonder Ben was pissed.

That brings us to Rene, both present and future. In the present, Emiko’s pursuit of her mother’s killers dovetails with his desire to protect his neighborhood and Lord knows Rene can relate to her anger issues. Besides, partnering with her fills the void left by his former teammates and offers him the means to make a difference. However, the fact Emiko is neither part of the flash-forwards nor mentioned as part of Oliver’s Mark of Four pact leads to the suspicion that their partnership is short-lived. So it is not hard to draw a line from the current iteration of Rene adrift from his former teammates and frustrated by his inability to protect his home to the future Mayor bent on protecting The Glades at the expense of Star City at large. What is still in question is the identity of future Rene’s mystery friend and murderer of Felicity (IMDB has him listed as Kevin Dale)? Who does he represent and are they pulling Future Rene’s strings or do they just think they are?

To be honest, this episode left me with mixed feelings. I appreciated the old-school feel. And the explanation of Emiko’s abandonment gave more depth to the Queen family dynamics years after Robert and Moira’s deaths, and Walter’s departure. Yet Oliver’s anger troubled me. Not only because of its one-sidedness but because his anger on his own behalf felt petty and his anger on Emiko’s behalf felt unearned. More important than that, the episode meant to introduce us to Emiko gave us more questions than answers and spent far more time on the people affected by her existence than on the woman herself.

3 out of 5 quilt forts

Parting Thoughts:

How is Emiko bankrolling this little enterprise? Bribing mobsters ain’t cheap.

In that same vein, did Curtis borrow an A.R.G.U.S. van or does a tricked out van come with the secret lair and the Hood?

We won’t discuss the whole chain of custody issue of giving crime scene evidence to the wife of an SCPD deputy. Can we say inadmissible in court, boys and girls?

Emiko threatened to put an arrow through Rene. Oliver’s been there and done that.

It was a nice touch having Jamey Sheridan read Robert Queen’s letter. It was bizarre that it was the only time my close captioning specified who was talking - wrongly stating it was Oliver.

I could find no mention of Talis Global in the world of DC Comics. However, William Glenmorgan definitely exists. So does Santa Prisca.

Future Rene doesn’t have his scar. Did The Glades Mayor get plastic surgery?

The Archer program wiped out crime in The Glades. And somehow Zoe almost ruined everything when she got her hands on it. Color me curious.

And I meant to ask this in Unmasked. When did the Queen Mansion get destroyed? Was Isabel Rochev so vindictive that she burned the place to the ground?

Quotes:

Rene: “I guess stubbornness comes with the suit.”

Diaz: “Let me be real clear for the cheap seats. Screw you.”

Felicity: “Some husbands bring their wives home flowers, and mine brings me blood from a crime scene. They say romance is dead.”

Oliver: “My father was always very good at burying secrets.”

Felicity: “One more thing.” Oliver: “Just one more?”

Lyla: “Are you questioning my decision, Deputy Director?” Bell: “Of course not, Madam Director. That kind of radical out-of-the-box approach is exactly the shot in the arm A.R.G.U.S. needs. I’m sure the Pentagon will be very excited to hear about this.”

Emiko: “People can’t let you down if you don’t let them in.”

Rene: “At least as mayor, I’m actually getting things done, not wasting my time running around the city in a hockey mask pretending that it mattered.”

Lyla: “And here I thought I was the one in danger of becoming Amanda Waller.”

Curtis: “I can knock out the whole system – cameras, motion sensors, the whole shebang. But it’s up to you guys to deal with that army of terminators yourselves.”

Emiko: “I’m still not looking for a team.” Rene: “Ok, fine. Then how about a partner?”

Dale: “Star City is a cancer. The only way to get rid of a cancer is to destroy it.”

Diaz: When I agreed to this deal, no one said anything about sticking a bomb in the back of my head."

Shari loves sci-fi, fantasy, supernatural, and anything with a cape.

#Arrow #Green Arrow #Oliver Queen #Felicity Smoak #John Diggle #DC Comics #Arrowverse #Arrow Reviews #Doux Reviews #TV Reviews

1 note · View note

braywashed · 6 years

Text

Since I’ve been putting it off due to lingering sicky feels, etc.

Here’s the far too long and far too unedited and written at 4am vacation rundown NO ONE ASKED FOR! (huzzah!)

So, yeah. I arrived at the new Amtrak station in the city which is a major upgrade from the trailer park reject of station the old one was. Way roomier. Could use a coffee stand or something but yeah. Improvement. Had to go underground under the tracks and back up to get to the very cold surface, it must suck in the winter.

About an hour, hour and a half into the trip I quickly realized that a.) all I wanted to do was sleep, and b.) that my throat was burning. I assumed this was due to the absurdly cold, non-stop dry ass air conditioning, but no. This bitch got sick for her entire trip. On the plus side I had the seats to myself for the majority of the trip, but still. I barely watched any CR or anything because I was miserable the entire time. Ya don’t wanna be miserable for 10+ hours on a train.

Got to Boston, to @conniecorleone‘s frightening apartment stairs. My bag was way too heavy and she troopered through taking it up them for me without dying. So if you ever need a tank in battle, call Rachel.

Hung out a little. Ordered some Five Guys. Watched a couple episodes of the first season of American Horror Story. I get the appeal but also never needed to see Dermot Mulroney’s ass.

Rach was busy with work stuff a lot early in the week, not helped by some dumbass school shooting threat the week before and kept apologizing while still going above and beyond as a hostess while I just felt guilty for getting snot on her sheets.

Day two I colored a bit. I can do a wicked water gradient with erasable colored pencils, for the record. Hung out. Relaxed. Used a lot of Zicam and Advil. Then we were on way to The Middle East for her conehead space boyfriend.

We waited like, an hour? In the chilly mist outside? The show started like AN HOUR LATE after that. The venue was nice but man, the mood was getting close to dead at points, especially since, again, FUCKIN SICK. But Planet Booty came on and while, a little on the bordering too raunchy side, put on a fucking amazing live show. Dylan has an absurd amount of energy that should be bottled and sold, but if it were it might result in the orgypocalypse. I saw a youtube comment that said he’s ‘very touchy lol’ and truer words never spoken. That man will grind on you and sing directly in your earlobe with his tongue if you are front row and happily, I was not. Yet somehow I still ended up with his sweat on my sweater sleeve thanks to someone being a dumbass and high fiving him after their set and not being able to handle the consequences. Ahem.

THEN TWRP TOOK LIKE ANOTHER GODDAMN HALF HOUR???

But I FORGIVE THEM because they were GREAT and played Daft Punk’s Celebrate in honor of motherfuckin Canadian Thanksgiving so... fine... I guess. My only complaint is they didn’t do The Perfect Product even though I get that’s probably a weird thing to do live. Also minimal keytar and Sung almost decapitated himself but you know... it happens. They DID do Tactile Sensation though which is a fucking jam. And Atomic Karate, ofc. And Meouch broke his fucking bass string which is like? Fucking hardcore? He came down like a foot away from us at one point. It was dope. They’re amazing live and have no right to be for dudes in ridiculous robot costumes playing synth in the year 2018 and rolling around stage on a hoverboard. Sadly I brought minimal memory cardage this year and didn’t get a lot of good video of them.

Afterwards, despite *someone* almost passing out, we hung out in the merch lines and did NOT accidentally cut ahead this time. I got a free signed poster because it was my birthday vacation ayyyyy and bought a couple EPs and the Together Through Time album. Then hopped over the PB’s line and got two hugs from Dylan who hung out and talked to/hugged/got selfies with every single person who got into line there and just? Good dude. Pure dude. Awful stache but... thumbs up human being. I got their Naked album and we headed out back to the apartment and some delivered Dominos (which was the only good Dominos I’ve ever had in my life.)

Day three I accidentally slept until like 4pm. Literally what else did we do that day? I cannot remember for the life of me. We might have went to Dunkin at like 9pm and she showed me a weird omnipotent plastic ear hanging on an electric wire? Was that this day? I have no fucking idea. Her Netflix and supply of Puffs tissues were my best friends this trip okay.

Day four she went to class and I relaxed and intended to walk to the mall. Unfortunately, my sick bleh hit and I didn’t feel up to going until about ten minutes before she got back. So we ended up heading over there together. I made her try Baja Blast, as is customary in my nation, and got her to try some green matte lipstick. Success. I was highkey hoping they would have a Build-A-Bear in the joint but they didn’t. They did have a Newbury though, that had the six-inch Roadhog pop which I’ve had a hard time finding locally, so I said fuck it and bought it.

That night was MST3k live! The theater was old as dirt. The kind of old as dirt where the flooring is bowing in. They had real strict rules on cameras and shit, which I get for the sake of spoilers but c’mon.... c’mon. Their merch sucked unfortunately though, so I didn’t waste any money on anything (for some reason they had 2017 tour stuff? It’s... not 2017?). The show itself was good, though I was wondering before it started how sick they must get of doing the same movie in different towns almost every other night. Pretty quickly realized oh, yeah, a lot of this show was likely pre-riffed. They did pull a kid from the stage at one point so he could guest riff off a script from Joel, which I’m thinking was a clever little insert fraction of the riff they did live between segments. I could be wrong, but on that front, it felt a little cheap. But it was still fun to see the boys and the bots live and have jokes cracked about not being able to afford the villains for the tour. And The Brain itself was........ I don’t know what I was expecting but..... it sure was.... something. The novelty was worth it and I will still gladly marry Crow T. Robot.

We went across the street to a little pub stop that was I think called Rock Bottom after that and got some much needed late night food. For some reason my brain was like “man, I could go for chicken fried steak right now” and don’t you know IT WAS ON THE FUCKIN MENU? WITH GARLIC CHEDDER MASHED POTATOES? Boston, much like with wings, does not know what country gravy is, but it was still everything I fucking wanted and did not expect to find, so A+. Also I was wearing a dress with shorts underneath it and stuck to the goddamn stool. Such is life.

Day five was rainy and miserable. I tagged along to university with Rach and it sucked, honestly. Being on a campus makes me feel awkward and the whole still being sick thing didn’t help. I ended up taking a walk way around the block to a Starbucks and getting the worst fucking frap I’ve ever paid too much money for. Went back around. Sat in the library. Felt even shittier. Started googling food places. Yard House wasn’t far but I didn’t want to deal with crossing a lot of traffic, especially if the rain started back up (it did, with a vengeance). So I ended up back around the block at some Olive Garden-esque fake Italian place with not an Italian in sight called Bertucci’s for some bland chicken-less fettuchini alfredo (because, as I’d reasoned with myself, I had chicken three times the day before). It was dimly lit, I had a booth to myself, and the water had the sweet skullet and braided beard combo I had liveblogged. People kept complimenting my tattoo. It was nice and no one seemed overly bothered that I was clearly killing time until I spent probably way too long in the restroom after trying to look alive. I tipped the dude ten bucks and left in the pouring rain with my umbrella.

From her school we took the world’s longest Uber to Parts Fucking Unknown in awful traffic and rain to find a Double Tree where @freakishlytallaustralian‘s parents were staying for a hot minute during their brief little US tour on their way to Europe. I’ve never met Mandi in person, but I’ve now met her parents who say she’s gotten to know a good bloke. She looks exactly like her mom. They were sweet. Anxious but sweet. And I am a freak who doesn’t talk and was sick trying to seem presentable at the bare minimum capacity.

Back ~home~ we ordered some JP Licks ice cream (BROWNIE BROWNIE BATTER!!! BROWNIE. BROWNIE. BATTER.), I watched CR and some stupid videos on the internet with her. Got some sleep. Sort of. Barely.

Despite Matt Mercer nearly succeeding at lulling me to sleep and eating my dreams, it didn’t happen, and I could not get comfortable for the life of me. The “coughing every five seconds in bed” started this night and was not having mercy. So I opted out of another day of hanging around campus to try and get some more rest. It didn’t really work, but I did eventually get a solid three hours or so, so it was something.

As the day progressed it was onward to the Science Museum to meet Ron the T-Rex. There was a wedding happening. How appropriate, for Bravier funko pops to have come along on the day of a blessed union. Coincidence? I think not. A turtle kept falling off a branch when he was trying to nap. There was some space stuff. It wasn’t great. But I got a little stuffed dinosaur and that’s Important.

From there we hit up the same movie theater we went to the year before and saw Bad Times At The El Royale. Do recommend. Chris Hemsworth as a Charles Manson was not something I ever thought I’d see, and I still don’t understand it, but it rather predictably works for me, so we’ll leave it at that. Good movie, good performances, good pacing and editing that could have easily not been. See it, it’s fun. Not perfect, but fun.

It was COLD AS BALLS after the movie and neither of us brought jackets or sweaters, so the walk to the train station and back ~home~ was a chilly one. We stopped in, got some warmth, and headed down the road past her old place to a bar. If we didn’t appreciate TWRP and PB enough already, the band she had to pay cover for us to get in for just to pick up food were about 8 upper middle aged men playing every instrument in the book. Afropunk, they said. No, we said. Offkey, we said. This place was dark as shit and loud as shit but you know what? They KNEW WHAT REAL, HOT CHICKEN WINGS WERE and for that, I am appreciative dammit.

Went back, got some more Dominos, and was finally introduced to John Mulaney’s (or two of) comedy specials. He’s genius and I *understand* it now, tumblr. I get it. We ate way too much and did my laundry.

The week had come and gone way too soon and I felt robbed of my good time by how shitty I felt. Hopping on the train the next day (after a godawful uber ride) was just as depressing as the time before. And even though I didn’t feel as miserable as the trip there, and once again had a window seat to myself, I found myself curled up against my hoodie crying trying to fall asleep again knowing I was already headed back home.

Once the initial depression passed, the trip wasn’t bad. The iced latte was good. The Albany stop not as confusing the second time around. The WiFi kept me company. Eventually my aunt texted me asking if I wanted to hit up Stevie T’s on the way home because they were 24hr and neither of us had eaten all night. It was a plan. Get off, get food, come home, faceplant on my own big comfy bed, vow to deal with my dad’s drama in the morning and call it a night.

Then *that* happened. Yeah. Last year? Every stop, regardless of time of night, they made announcements. They came by, checked the marker above your seat, and if you were due off at the next stop told you it was coming up, would help with luggage if needed, and directed you to the correct door to exit the train. This year? Nothing. They decided to stop making announcements right before the Rochester stop, and no one came by in our car to tell us where to get off. Stopped, myself and the other person due off at that stop, a late-teens girl, went to the door at the front of our car where every other stop had gotten off before us. We assumed since no one said differently, and no attendants were around, that must be it. We were idiots. Because by the time we realized hey, they’re not going to open this door and we should go to the far other end of the train, it was already moving again en route to Buffalo.

We found ourselves in the dining booths by the cafe car while the staff made vague remarks and the conductor acted like it wasn’t his problem. My aunt on the phone talked to the Rochester station, we tried to claim I didn’t even have a reservation until about two other people looked up my ticket. They said it was up to the conductor to get us a cab home, he laughed at us, claimed to know nothing about any of that, and asked if were were going to buy the bus tickets the other girl was looking up. The bus for 3am, in downtown Buffalo, nowhere near the station. When we got off the staff at the Depew station was a lot more sympathetic, and said since nothing else was being offered he would put us on the next train back home, but since it was a Sunday morning there was no train to Rochester until roughly 7:45am. It was about 1:30 at this point. I felt awful for encouraging the other girl not to pay for two ubers and a bus ticket with the only alternative being offered to sit alone in an empty, unstaffed station in the middle of the night for hours. And between the situation, being tired and still sick, and dealing with my aunt calling hotels only to get put on hold and lose the room she was trying to reserve - I put my bags in a corner, found the restroom, and had a panic attack. I don’t know why, but those tend to be stupid like that. It’s not even like I was scared, or confused, or that worried myself. I started out very ‘whatever, I’ll just get a room or stay in the station, I’m pissed but whatever’. But something about the constant calls and texts and my battery nearing 0 had me stressed and I was crying like a bitch. I just wanted to fucking sleep, and I knew that wouldn’t happen in a train station with nothing but some benches, a restroom, and a vending machine.

Rach suggested an alternative I felt guilty about taking but ended up going for: Get to her parents house just outside Buffalo, get their spare key, and sleep on their couch while they’re out of town with their blessing. So I called an Uber, and the first one passed me by, with the gps fucking up and saying I should be picked up ON THE TRAIN TRACKS. The second guy was smart enough to come to the cab pickup out front and was really cool. He said he was just thankful I wasn’t a fucked up drunk college party kid and the first all night. He didn’t comment on how I probably definitely looked like I’d just been broken up with in the world’s worst romcom. It was over 20 bucks and I tipped him the max. Found my way inside, set up the couch, and continued my momentarily on hold panic until I eventually passed out. My Aunt came to pick me up in the morning, I got carsick, we had mediocre diner breakfast and what’s after that isn’t news worth talking about. Isn’t it bad enough the tail end of the trip took up like a third of this post?

All in all... it felt like a disaster. I’m not gonna lie. In weird ways the stars aligned that TWRP would end up on Conan the night of their show and have to reschedule to the day I came to town, but I paid for it with otherwise bad timing and my body deciding against me having a good time. Fun was had, don’t get me wrong. The good was good and any chance to get away from... this, is appreciated, but it just seemed like everything went awry.

Mucho thanks to @conniecorleone again, for letting me crash on the futon and be my usual bland self, even blander while ill, and also buying me expensive cold syrup and a-many ubers.

We’ll see if Massachusetts and I ever cross paths again.

#sam does boston round two

4 notes · View notes