PROLOGUE
CHICAGO , IL . — 1993
THE KANKAKEE HOUSE
[ mentions of drugs , cheating , hook ups , and vomiting/sickness]
wc : 2,033
TO BE LOVED , WAS TO BE CHANGED.. or so that's what y/n thought as she sat in that same old chair at her desk , the big diamond rock resting on a gold band was twisted around on her finger . James knew she didn't have to have a something that large but he insisted , and she gave into it , knowing that this was the one thing she had wanted for a life time.
Y/n was a woman who grew up with a family of politics . Her dad was a retired narcotics investigator , her mother a forensic scientist who chose to be a stay at home mom , and then there was y/n . An agent , who was engaged to a drug dealer . It was risky to say the least , her badge stayed in her glove box at all times so she could live up to her lies of being a journalist . It wasn't easy to say the least , but she was a good liar , and Jimmy was so smitten he would believe anything she told him . So , the back-up career she had never taken a class for became her cover up, her white lie . Everyone had their secrets , why not let Y/n have hers.
Her thoughts were interrupted when a stack of files were placed on top of her desk , a repeat of all the things shes already seen . She took her time and flipped through every single file . Homicide . Murder . Kidnapping . Another homicide . It was all the same half of the time , but it didn't stop her from being able to make a detailed report for an investigation to take place . The sound of doors being kicked in played in her head , something she found to be an anger release during training . She hadn't traveled yet for a case , but she's only been there for about a month , so it was a reasonable effect to the cause .
All the files were stacked neatly on her desk as she checked the time . It was already noon , which meant she had three hours left before she had to clock out and leave , which didn't bother her in the slightest . It was a shock to her that she was leaving before seven , but it may happen anyway with the afternoon traffic jam . As she rose from her seat , she decided to go on a lunch break , that was the one thing she needed was a break , she had been exhausted since she had walked into work this morning , completely ignoring the fact that Jimmy didn't get home until four that morning . It was a repeating cycle , and it almost seemed like he was only coming home in the wee hours of the morning , and sleeping all throughout the day . It was almost as if y/n didn't know who her fiancé was anymore , as if he was a complete stranger .
...
Four rings , no answer .
Y/n pulled the phone from her ear and called again .
Four more rings , no answer .
Why wasn't James answering his phone ? She tried one more time .
Four rings , still no answer .
It was unusual for James to not answer the phone . Regardless of what was happening , he always picked up the phone and answered . Suspicion was drawn to her mind as she got lost in her thoughts . Was he upset with her ? What had she done to make him not answer the phone ? It had burned a hole into her brain . She looked at the time on her phone , 2:47 pm , thirteen minutes until she could go home , thirteen minutes until she knew why he wasn't picking up the phone ,
thirteen minutes before her world came crashing down around her.
Y/n put the cigarette out that rested between nimble , shaking fingers as she tried to calm her nerves . She made her way back into the big double-decker building behind her . The building stood tall , it was strong , and prominent . You wouldn't be able to miss it when you enter Illinois , it stood out in the eyes of many , and in the eyes of the fallen . It was probably ironic due to the crime rates in the little state , but especially in Chicago . The irony made her laugh every time she thought about it , but today she wasn't laughing, she was trembling with fear .
The sound of her heels clicking against the floor was all she could manage to focus on , the fear of losing balance playing in her mind as she tried to justify why her calls were declined . It was heavy on her mind , and her heart at the thought of doing something wrong , and being here was starting to feel like a sense of betrayal to the man who waited for her at home . Maybe he knew this whole time and didn't tell her , or maybe he was ready to kick her to the curb for a risk of being outed to the feds for his crimes .
Y/n was once again snapped out of her thoughts when the clock read three o'clock . She had went and clocked out and darted straight out of the building , in hopes of being home fast enough to catch Jimmy before he left out for the night , or before his buddies had came over. Getting into that car was her only form of peace , the calm before the storm , because she knew she was only closer to getting an answer .
...
The drive home was quiet , mainly because y/n was going sixty on a forty-five without a cop in sight , she was sure she ran at least two red lights trying to get home . That was her main focus as she passed cars left and right , getting honked at every couple of minutes as she came close to scrubbing against another car . She was no longer upset , she was angry , it felt as if her blood was boiling underneath her skin . She was full of rage .
She needed an answer.
Pulling into the driveway of her home , she didn't even turn her car off as she pulled it to a stop and swapped gears so it was in park . Y/n got out and went straight for the door which was unlocked.. why was it unlocked if James was home? The door would usually be locked at this time, it would never stay unlocked, it was too risky . As her heels touched the hardwood floor , she looked around her home in a fury of rage , her calm steps turning into a march of gentle stomping , it was quiet ... too quiet .
"James ?" y/n called out , and there was no response , it was quiet , a noise so deafening it made her head ache.
As she neared the steps , the pink top on the staircase made her heart sink . Y/n knew it wasn't hers , she didn't wear pink , especially not a deep toned pink . Her steps became quiet as she walked up the steps , the pink top came with a mini-skirt , a matching bra and underwear set , and a pair of heels that were way out of her range .
The clothes stopped at the door where Jimmy's belt laid , she was beyond mad at this point as she took the doorknob into her grasp , twisting it around and making the door open . The sight had made her sick . Physically , mentally and emotionally as she made a bee-line directly to the ensuite bathroom and dropped to her knees , spilling the contents of her lunch into the toilet . Why would he do this to her , was this why he wasn't answering the phone?
She managed to collect herself as she got up off the floor and flushed the contents down the drain . Her steps could be heard as she made her way to the closet to grab a suitcase and put her belongings into it , but she was interupted when she heard the stirring behind her.
James had scrambled to get out of the bed , with only a sheet wrapped around his waist . He didn't notice y/n was in the room until he had heard a dresser drawer being opened , it was as if his whole world came crashing down beneath him . Her face was red with anger , her eyes swelled with the tears that fell down her cheeks , how could he be this stupid .
"y/n , listen - its not what it looks li-" Jimmy was cut off as y/n zipped the suitcase , listening to the pained chuckle pass her lips as she stood up on her own two feet .
"it's not what it looks like?" she spoke , stepping closer to him slowly as she spoke . "I have called , and called with no answer , then I come home and you have some random tramp in MY bed?" she spat , seething with anger as she laughed a little .
Jimmy was distraught , he didn't even remember half of the events that took place . " It wasn't like that , just listen to me for a second" he spat back , but y/n was too distraught herself to hear him out .
"It wasn't like what , James ? Because it sure looks like you fucked her to me. " y/n spoke through gritted teeth , her words piercing through the man like a knife .
"I don't want to hear anything you have to say , you can keep your cheap whore , your fancy house , your drug business , all of it . I'm done" y/n spat through tears and choked sobs . Her hand wrapped around the suitcase as she made her way to the door , but she stopped and put her bags down as she turned around , pulling the ring off her finger in the process , and shoved it into his hand .
"you can keep the rock , I won't need it . Not now , and not in the near future. " she spoke before going back to grab her suitcase and walk out the door for the last time . This was going to be the death of her .
...
TO BE LOVED , IS TO BE BETRAYED ... and she knew that now as she drove out of Illinois , she didn't even know how far she was driving at this point , she lost count of the exit signs as her tears flowed and confusion filled her brain , but anywhere was better than the state she grew to love .
The sun was setting by now , the woman had been driving for hours now . Y/n made a few pit stops for gas , food , and to change into some comfortable clothes . An energy drink coursed through her veins and she seen a sign up ahead that read "MISSOURI WELCOMES YOU" in white and yellow letters .
Y/n let out a soft sigh as she continued her journey , looking around for the nearest motel to stay at for a few days . Her legs ached , and her vision was becoming splotchy , she needed to rest for a few hours , or even just a few days.
Maybe it was fate , or maybe it was destiny , but Missouri was a place she felt free , a place she felt she could restart in .
A place she could call home..
taglist ; @astralmctive , @stilessbaseballbat (let me know if you’d like to be added )
a/n : chapter one will be posted tomorrow at midnight , I actually cried writing the prologue, but the first chapter will be much more exciting , I can’t wait to share it with everyone !!
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[mentions of drugs + hook ups ]
— early years (the good)🌷
jimmy keene , who you’ve known since you were both in diapers + played together in his parents living room floor
jimmy keene , who would bring you little wild flowers out of the ground that first bloomed in the spring
jimmy keene , who was your first real friend in elementary school , and always made sure you sat next to him in the cafeteria because “other girls had cooties , but not y/n”
jimmy keene , who gave you lunch money for ice cream because you lost yours in your moms car
jimmy keene , who ran to your home-made box first to put valentines cards inside that he stayed up all night making for you
jimmy keene , who saw you crying on the playground because you fell in the mulch , and dusted your knees off and said “its okay , it’s just a little scratch , let’s go play on the swings ! “
jimmy keene , the only boy your parents allowed to stay the night for a sleepover , all because your mothers worked together
jimmy keene , the first person who ever really mattered to you..
— the awakening senses of two teenagers (the bad)🫀
jimmy keene , who was always dotted on by teachers for “being a cops kid” . not a day went by where he wasn’t talked about .
jimmy keene , who had 3 out of 6 classes with you , and still always made sure you sat beside him . people always thought you guys were thicker than thieves .
jimmy keene , who never understood the English homework that was given , so he always came over to get help with studying , and admired you for being so in touch with English literature
jimmy keene , who was always getting you both in trouble for talking in class , which lead to the first time you ever had detention .. your father wasn’t too pleased with that one.
jimmy keene , who came over when his parents divorced , and cried because he thought he would never see his father again. He was never the same when Big Jim Keene moved out . he had lost his first best friend
jimmy keene , who got on the football team , which caused you to jump with joy as he was finally achieving what he dreamed of .
jimmy keene , who made your heart beat out of your chest when he was near you . he made you feel those butterflies in your stomach , but who were you kidding , you guys were just friends .
jimmy keene , who got into an argument with you after you found out he was selling pot . you told him that it wasn’t a good idea . he told you to stop acting like you were his mother .
jimmy keene , who asked you out on the football field after a big win — there was no doubt you said yes , everyone knew jimmy + y/n , the biggest couple of Kankakee Highschool
jimmy keene , the man you wanted to spend the rest of your life with ..
— you were supposed to be in love , right ? (The chosen) 🚬
jimmy keene , who was with you all throughout college . he got his scholarships through sports , and got another degree elsewhere . you on the other hand , were a law major . being a federal agent was a dream to you
jimmy keene , who was still invested in the drug business after almost 8 years of college . you dared not to say a word , you’ve been together since highschool , why would you ever question the man you hoped to become your husband ?
jimmy keene , who owned a couple of homes . some vacation lot and the Kankakee house , in which you both lived . he loved it , it was the dream spot for him , for you it was an unseen look into the future .
jimmy keene , who started to bring home weapons . and put you into a spiral . “james you can not just bring an AK into our home , what if you get caught?” , “why are you so worried ? it’s not like I’m gonna use it— quit complaining .”
jimmy keene , who would come home at late hours of the night , and even wee hours of the morning. 12:47 am , 2:04 am , 5:58 am ? what was he doing coming home this late ?
jimmy keene , who bought you an expensive dress from Versace the night he asked you to be his wife . it was like all of your worries had washed away . It was the 90s after all , 1993 to be exact . anything could distract anyone.
jimmy keene , who was excited that you started off in your career , you didn’t tell him you were working for the bureau , you told him you were working in journalism . and nothing could beat his excitement for you , future Mrs. Keene
jimmy keene , who ran around the room in a panic . a sheet wrapped around his slim waist when you came home the next morning to a woman in your bed , lines of cocaine on your dresser , and both parties in the nude . he was your fiancé ? how could he do this to you , he loved you … right?
jimmy keene , who broke down and cried that night in the living room floor as the house was quiet . you had packed your stuff and left , you drove so far you didn’t even realize you were in Missouri . but you also realized , this was the start of your new life . he kept the engagement ring tucked in a coat pocket , in case you ever came back to him .
jimmy keene , who still hadn’t got over you in three years . he made sure he found you in every woman he slept with , just to give his heart a rest . Until his home was raided in 1996 . he knew this was the end , he’d never get a chance to salvage that relationship with you ever again . he finally realized that it was over
or was it …
the last thing you expected to fall onto your desk was a file . Larry Hall was a well known suspect you had , but when you got a file from Beaumont , it was the one thing you knew would happen .
You opened the file and was met with the familiar face that you once fell in love with … Jimmy Keene .
It was risky , you knew the whole plan was , but the plane ride from Missouri back to Chicago was something that had your heart racing .
—
Two days later , you had stepped foot into the penitentiary , the decision was still being made at who would go in undercover. the sound of your heels hitting the concrete linoleum floor sounded louder in the dimly lit hallway.
When you opened the door, you sat down in the chair opposite of the one in front of you, which was later filled by the man himself , Jimmy Keene .
Giving him a small smile , you placed the file on the table and watched as his face contorted. Was it fear ? Was it excitement ? Or was it betrayal .
“Let’s begin , shall we ? … Mr . Keene “
THE GOOD , THE BAD , AND THE CHOSEN — jan . 26 , 2024
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