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thatsthewrongwallcraig · 8 months

Note

I know you wrote for Kappa/Euro. Hear me out.. could you write for Euro/Dead from lords of chaos? No one writes for jack kilmer and it drives me insane‼️😭

Pure Fucking Armaggedon

Summary: In the midst of a heavy night of partying with the Black Circle, you crave your boyfriend's attention but just like so often lately, he's very much not interested, leading you to meet your needs somewhere else…

Pairing: Dead x fem!Reader x Euronymous

Word Count: ~3.7k

Content Warnings: Trve Kvlt Smvt 18+!, Talk About Depression/Mental Illness, Talk About Self-Harm, Very Angsty, Hurt/Comfort...ish, Alcohol, Smoking, Cheating…But With A Twist, Fingering, Unprotected P In V, Creampie, Pet Names

A/N: Hi, anonnie! Thank you very much for this ask <3 Before everybody jumps into my inbox about Jack Kilmer: Please don’t, okay? He’s not tickling my brain like Rory does and I’d hate to let y’all down by having requests sitting in my inbox collecting dust 🖤 However, I'd be lying if I said I wasn't having a lot of fun writing this chaos!

Massive thanks to @spookyorchid for endlessly entertaining my rambles and inspiring me!

Disclaimer: This is solely based on the characters depicted in Lords Of Chaos!

Tagging the horny horde:

@crypticsewerslut @quicksilversg1rl @cc-luvr @icarus-star @milaeth @roryculkinsgf @spookyorchid @arch1viste @whoareyoi @angelsanarchy @blueberrypancakesworld @rocketqueen-world @lifelessvessel @doddernix @svgarcaine @amayalul @basementgrl222 @kristennero-wallacewellsver @iiheartsai @fan-goddess @shady-the-simp

Could you stomach it anymore

Could you stand to be a breath away

Can you feel the way your face distorts

Did you think that it could be this way

- Stomach It By Crywolf

Your upper lip twitched a little as your gaze darted right into your boyfriend's chestnut-coloured eyes. In a rather stark contrast to yours, Pelle's expression was indifferent whilst he stared back at you, face smeared with a now gray amalgamation of once black and white corpse paint.

"Sorry…" He muttered, his voice lacking the depth and sympathy to really sell his point.

"No…it's, it's okay, really. It makes no sense to pressure yourself when you're not in the mood, no." You shrugged your shoulders at him, very much meaning what you said whilst you still felt that massive rock of repeated disappointment settling down in your stomach.

"I'm gonna go grab another beer then…can I get you something?" Pelle shook his head lightly.

"No, but thanks. I think I should just go to sleep now." The Swede with the long blonde hair allowed himself to slump deeper down into the old, worn out sofa, crossing his arms in front of his chest and with that not just verbally but also physically blocking you out.

"Nighty then…" You mumbled, turning away from your boyfriend to hide just how hard you fought to keep your composure.

Neither the heavy leather jacket, the edgy metal studs and spikes all over nor your trusty Darkthrone shirt hugging your torso were able to shield you from the emotional hurt raging inside of you. It's been months since Pelle last touched or so much as kissed you on the mouth. You knew just fine that something wasn't alright with him, that he was going through an episode again and the last thing you intended on doing was putting any blame for that on him but fuck was it challenging you this time. It didn't go past you how the I love you's had become more and more scarce, how he turned his back to you at night whilst you stared at the ceiling hoping for the oncoming episode to wash over him in a few, swift weeks but his current black hole of depression was unlike anything before. You hardly recognised your boyfriend anymore and felt like nothing but an accessory to the whole band persona he'd put up to cover up how much he was actually hurting on the inside.

To not come off as a soft, little crybaby to everybody else, you stifled your breath and wiped the emerging gush of tears from your lower lash line as fast as you could before making your way out to the densely crowded yard again. Empty bottles of beer lined the way whilst partially smoked-up cigarettes laid scattered all over, the heavy smell of a raging bonfire filled the crisp night breeze. Whilst almost violently looking to the ground to avoid anybody seeing you being about to burst into tears, you rushed to one of the cooling boxes to grab a beer or preferably something stronger. A sense of recklessness washed through you as you dug a deeply green, still halfway full glass bottle from the cooler. Jägermeister would serve you just fine right now.

Armed with the strong booze, you went right back into the house, hiding yourself away from all the action to simply get drunk in peace and solitude.

"Ugh…" Your whole body quivered as the herbal liquor shot down your throat, drenching your mouth in its bitter taste.

Right after the sensation eased up a little, you chased the first swig with a second, deeper one, the alcohol burning its way through your stomach before you'd even reached the corner of the house that could be described as a guest room to slump down on an array of dusty mattresses. With the intense warmth of heavy liquor washing through your body, you curled yourself up, shoving an old pillow underneath your head and before you really realized it, vagrant, quiet tears trickled from the corners of your eyes, pooling at the tear duct to eventually swap over the bridge of your nose. If you were honest with yourself, you felt sick of it, sick of being ignored and pushed away but at the same time you just couldn't bring yourself to point the finger at Per. He simply didn't choose this way of being and feeling yet it felt like he wasn't even trying anymore…which, again, would just be another symptom. You sighed in defeat before treating yourself to another numbing mouthful of booze.

Allowing the tears to just run down your face at their very own pace, you simply wanted to get drunk as fast as possible but even that wouldn't be granted to you, a gentle knock on the slightly ajar door pulling you from your thoughts.

"Huh?" You muttered, sitting up straight again and wiping the wetness from your cheeks.

"Hey…are you okay?" The familiar voice belonging to Øystein asked.

His head peaked through the open door, a messy bunch of black hair framing his face in wavy strands.

"Saw you rushing through the yard and thought checking up on you wouldn't hurt…" He slid his lean statue through the small opening, stepping towards you before crouching down to meet your gaze.

"See? That's part of the problem…you, you care and Pelle just…he just sits there." The words blubbered out of you in an uncontrolled rush accompanied by a new surge of hot tears.

"Hey now…", Euronymous quickly sat down, tucking the frizzy hair behind his ears, "What's going on, hm?"

"I'm so sick of this shit, Øystein… I can't help him, I can't fix him and he just pushes me away time and time again. I'm so done with this bullshit." It practically gushed out of your mouth in a poorly choked-back wail.

"There's a whole horde of people out there, Euro, yet I feel so terribly fucking lonely all the time. Everybody's cheering for Mayhem and for Dead, going on about how fucking cool and true he is for what he's doing to himself on stage but you know what?", You tried to stifle your shaky breaths, "It's not cool. None of it. It's actually fucking terrifying…and it's me who's got to stitch him back to gether every damn time."

With every one of your words, Øystein's eyes widened a little more, partly in understanding about just how much his friend was dragging you through but also in plain sympathy for you.

"Come'ere, yeah? C'mon…if it helps you can squeeze me as hard as you want to, okay?" Euronymous spread both his arms, inviting you in for a tight hug.

Not wasting a second thought on it, you leaned in, wrapping your shaking hands around his shoulders to squeeze and press as tightly as you could.

"There you go…that's it, right there." Euronymous encouraged you, the palms of his broad hands resting at the back of your head to soothe you with gentle pets and strokes.

"I wish I could help you but none of us really gets through to him anymore…I'm so sorry." Øystein sighed into the curve of your neck, the tip of his nose almost touching the cold, black leather of your jacket.

"I don't even know what's going on with him anymore. Everything is just so terribly wrong and I don't know how much longer I can do this shit, Euro, I really don't." You sniffled, inevitably having the vastly different scent of Euronymous right in front of you sneaking up into your nostrils.

Unlike Pelle, he smelled like stale cigarette smoke, cheap aftershave and beer…maybe not exactly a crowd pleaser but you found comfort in it.

"It's okay. I don't judge you." He whispered to you in a soft tone and it threatened to break you apart from the inside.

"Thank you…", You croaked into his hair, your voice getting weaker with every letter, "I feel so shitty for thinking about it like that but…but I'm so goddamn tired. I-...I just wanna feel loved again."

"To remind you…there's a whole horde of people out there who love you." He tried to cheer you up but ultimately missed the point.

"Not…not like that. Ugh, I sound stupid…" You felt the need to take the words straight back and to just go with Øystein's attempt of calming you.

"No, you don't, seriously.", Euronymous led his fingers to get lost in your hair, fingertips softly stroking across your scalp down to the nape of your neck, "I can't imagine how you came up with enough energy to stay this long in the first place. We both know it's not his fault, neither is it yours or mine but we've all been watching you breaking away because of him. You're not smiling anymore, not screaming your lungs out at the gigs, you're barely even here anymore…he's eating you up."

"I can't just leave, Øystein…" You gradually loosened your death grip around his torso to lean back, your face wet with slowly subsiding tears.

"I know…all I'm saying is that it might be time to think about yourself a little more. It won't help anybody if you get lost in his chaos, too." Before you could raise your own hand to wipe the sleeve of your jacket across your face, Euronymous was already on it, his thumb brushing over your cheek.

Whilst taking a deep breath to steady yourself a bit more, the two of you just stared at each other for a moment. You followed how he slightly grinded his teeth together, jaws clenching, withholding something you couldn't quite decipher.

"Øystein?" You furrowed your brows a little, the feeling of something being violently off ebbing through your chest.

"I'm sorry…" That's all he offered to you before cupping your face with the full length of his palm and leaning in to press an anything but timid kiss to your trembling lips.

A part of you, the voice of reason within, practically screamed at you to pull away, to scurry back and to let this go down as nothing but an awkward, boozy, little slip-up, but you didn't move by just an inch as the pungent taste of smoked cigarettes and cheap beer swept into your mouth alongside Euronymous' daring tongue. You simply let it happen, allowed him to slip his tongue into your mouth and intoxicate you with the dangerously addictive feeling of being wanted, desired by someone.

"Fuck…" You groaned into the nearly bruising kiss, hands reaching out to claw at his utterly worn out Venom shirt to pull him closer to you.

Catching the notion that he had dared to make the right move at the right time, Øystein's palm left your face, both hands roaming over your back down to your ass to simply scoop you into his lap, your legs wrapping themselves around the cold of his bullet-shell belt as the hem of your washed-out, gray denim skirt rode up generously over your fishnet-stocking covered thighs.

"I got you…just hold on to me." Euronymous muttered, trying to catch his breath a little whilst his fingers dug themselves into the curve of your behind, causing you to whine out as you arched your hips impossibly close towards his crotch.

The aching need to feel just something again practically pulsed through every nerve ending and every muscle, pulling you into his tight grasp and for your hands to slip under the soft fabric of his shirt, skin against skin leaving you to crave more. Whilst one of his hands left it's place cupping your ass to hurry down between your bodies, awkwardly fumbling with the buckle of his belt before almost violently pulling down the zipper, a short but heavy pang of guilt jolted through your ribcage, nearly causing you to flinch on the spot. Nothing about this situation at hand was right or somehow, in some crooked way, justifiable to you and yet you made not a single move to stop any of it from happening. You didn’t grasp for Øystein's hand as it hushed from his unzipped pants amidst your legs, the sound of your tights tearing and ripping thundering in your ears, right before curious fingertips brushed over thin lace panties, no. The only reaction it pulled from your body was a needy moan.

"Right there, yeah?" You heard the smirk in his tone without even needing to see it.

Nodding softly, you placed your mouth back onto his, teeth teasingly grazing over his bottom lip.

"Bet that feels even better, babe." At first you didn't know what struck you harder, the endearing pet name or Euronymous' fingers snaking past your slip, dipping right into your soaked folds to draw achingly slow circles around your entrance.

"Please…" You hummed into the kiss, your forehead leaning against his.

"Please, what?", He inquired, fingertips prodding and nudging against your cunt, "Want me to fill you up, no? Such a greedy little thing."

You choked back a whine as Øystein withdrew his hand from your slip to shove the fabric to the side, fingers freeing his rock-hard cock from the confines of his shorts right before thrusting into you with a precise rock of his hips against yours.

"Oh, fuck…" Your moan got lost in his mouth, the delicious feeling of being stretched out so harshly rippling through you.

"How long has it been, huh?" He pushed, drilling himself into you until it threatened to hurt.

"I dunno…four months, maybe five." You couldn't stop your eyes from fluttering shut, the burning heat of arousal and shame creeping into your face in equal parts.

"Yeesh, couldn't leave a girl like you untouched for that long." Euronymous huffed, his other hand steadying your posture with his palm flat against your back as he started rolling his hips, practically bouncing you on his cock.

With your entire body flush with the sensation of Øystein spearheading into you in a firm pace, the last bit of your coherent brain busy muffling and holding back desperate mewls and whimpers, you rendered completely oblivious to what was happening around you…unlike the black-haired guitarist. From the very corner of his eyes, Øystein's attention got pulled towards the semi-open door, the old, wooden floor in front of it creaking treacherously. Just by the way a well familiar pair of thoroughly worn out combat boots barely peaked across the lines of the door frame, he knew that the both of you had been caught right in the act but he didn't so much as even bother to stop from guiding you up and down his throbbing hard on.

"You at least got yourself off here and there, no?" You shook your head.

"Didn't feel right. I- I just hoped things would get back to normal…" You groaned, the sensation of Euronymous' cock stroking over that extra sensitive spot inside of you sending cold, little shivers down your spine.

"Oh, love, then I better make sure to give it to you better than Per ever could…lazy fucker." Øystein scoffed more to his friend and singer hiding next to the door frame than to you but you didn't take any notice of that, your senses way too busy with just keeping it together.

For a moment, Øystein felt actual and very real rage gushing through him. Anger towards his friend for being such an oblivious prick regarding the suffering and all-round neglect he was dragging you through. It was a terribly self-righteous emotion, that he knew for sure, however, he couldn't help himself but to let it fuel the way he rutted into you, burying himself as deep as possible inside of your wet pussy.

The rather morbid thing both of you failed to take notice of was what Dead was doing hidden away in the shadows of the hallway, the crushing humiliation not only going straight to his heart but to his awfully throbbing cock as well, the bitter-sweet masochistic rush leading him to palm himself through his trousers whilst biting down on his fist to not let just one singular sound escape from his twitching lips. The Swede was shamelessly jerking himself off to you getting railed by his closest friend.

"Gonna take good care of you, babe." Øystein groaned in a lust-riddled tone, both of his hands now closing down around your hips to hammer your form onto his cock with every jut and snap of his hips.

It had you bashfully nuzzling your face into the crook of his neck, the cigarette smoke soaked leather of his jacked cold against your cheek, whilst you still clawed at his sides underneath his shirt.

Your fingers dug into his skin as you felt your walls starting to flutter and contract around Øystein's hard on, the first crushing jolts of your pent-up orgasm rippling through your body, senses being sent into blissful overdrive.

"Good girl…fuck, pulling me in so hard now, huh?" Euronymous' voice cracked and eventually faltered just like the rolls of his lap against yours.

"Issok…", He talked you through your release, shoving himself balls deep into your spasming cunt before flooding your insides with white-hot ropes of his seed, a guttural groan ripping itself free from the depths of his lungs, "Just let yourself go. I gotchu."

The earth-shattering sensation of all the pent-up sexual desperation mixed in with shame and crushing guilt washing through your system had you biting down on his leather-clad shoulder, a fresh surge of tears threatening to swap over your lower lash line at any second.

"Aw, shit." A sore croak from outside the room led both of you to turn your heads so suddenly that it nearly gave you whiplash.

"The fuck?!" You shrieked out, practically jumping from Øystein's lap whilst he was equally busy with tucking himself back in and getting off the mattress.

"I got this!" Euronymous tried to calm you, awkwardly stumbling away from you before tearing the door open and vanishing into the dark hallway.

For a split second your overworked synapses tried to get a vague grasp on what was going down. Feet were hammering down stairs, noisy commotion erupted from inside the house before the sound of shattering glass and incomprehensible screaming and shouting filled the yard.

"Oh fuck no…" You huffed under your breath, wobbly legs nearly giving out as you tried to pull yourself from the mattress.

As soon as you stood upright again, you felt Øystein's load oozing out of you, soaking the flimsy fabric of your slip with every step you took. You dreaded the scenario that was unfolding outside because the yelling didn't seem to die down but much rather escalate further.

"You fucking traitor!" Pelle's raspy voice cut through the night air, hitting you as soon as you slid out the front door.

"Fucking traitor?!", Øystein spat right back whilst your eyes scanned the scenery anxiously, "You're the spineless loser, Per!"

"You fucked my girlfriend, Øystein!" Dead yelled and with his words you noticed Metallion and Jan Axel staring right at you, nothing but drunk confusion washing over their faces.

"And you pathetic fuck got off to it!" Euronymous had to duck down to dodge an empty beer bottle being sent his way.

"You what?!" You directed the question right at your boyfriend before you noticed a tell-tale damp and soaked-through spot right around his zipper.

"Yes, please tell her how you stood outside the room jerking off to your girl breaking down in front of me, Per!" Your bewildered stare rushed towards Øystein now.

"Huh? You…you saw him or what now?!?" The guitarist shrugged his shoulders and nodded.

"What the fuck is going on in here?" Jan Axel tried to intervene but both Per and Øystein shushed him almost simultaneously.

"You shut the fuck up!" Pelle sneered, looking like he was about ready to throw one of the plenty empty bottles of beer after his drummer too.

"No.", You huffed, wrapping your leather jacket around your torso to shield you from the creeping cold, "He actually got a point, because…what the hell?!"

"Pumpkin, I can explain, I promise." Per raised his hands in a soothing manner but you didn't feel like having any of it.

"Don't you dare sweet-talk me now, Pelle! You've been pushing me away for months but…you get off to, well, this?" You indirectly confirmed all that had been happening between Øystein and you.

"No. Just no. You know what? Fuck you. Fuck this shit. I'm not even remotely drunk enough to deal with this shitshow right now." To undoubtedly cement your point, you took a few swift steps toward Øystein who was looking at you with wide eyes as you fished for the pack of cigarettes in his pocket, drawing one for yourself before deliberately putting it to your lips.

"Yes, I fucked Øystein.", You threw your hands into the air after lighting the cigarette, "Maybe I should've done that much sooner, who knows?"

The last sentence was solely aimed to hurt Per as much as he had hurt you.

"Fucking hell, I'm so sick of all this dysfunctional shit…", You just shook your head before heading back inside, "Better none of you disrupt the date I have with a piss-warm bottle of Jägermeister now or you fucking bet I'll cut your dick off!"

#tam rambles #asks are appreciated #asks are always open #rory culkin #rory culkin lords of chaos #lords of chaos #jack kilmer #euronymous x reader #euronymous smut #euronymous #dead lords of chaos #euronymous x fem!reader #dead x fem!reader #jack kilmer smut #jack kilmer x fem!reader #mayhem fic #mayhem

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tryingtofindava · 7 months

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pls im begging for dating ticci toby headcanons 🙏🙏

𝐃𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 ‘𝐓𝐢𝐜𝐜𝐢’ 𝐓𝐨𝐛𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬*ೃ༄

tw: mention of manic episode.

: ̗̀➛ Back to source

My god.

This boy is full of so much love.

Y’all take FOREVER to actually get together.

It got to the point where Toby got frustrated and was all like “should I just kill them?” (Assuming you ain’t a proxy)

What I’m tryna say is he’s sorta oblivious to his feelings towards you.

But he’s so scared to get attached to you, cuz every time he’s ever gotten close to someone they die.

But when y’all (finally) get together after a long ahh slow burn.

YOU TWO ARE LITERALLY THE CUTEST OMD.

He was so surprised that you said yes when he asked you out. Like- you? The pretty girl who he had the the pleasure of becoming friends with???? Says yes to him????

He’s so happy

Buttttttttttttttt.

So awkward it’s almost painful.

Onetime you kissed him on his cheek, bro was all like ‘🧍’

But when you guys get past that awkward stage? You guys are practically attached to the hip.

And I know most of the fandom hates the ‘soft Toby’ stereotype, but I feel like that’s just how he is w you (though he does have his moments…)

Lots of reassurance. It’s needed if y’all wanna last.

He isn’t used to have someone be so affectionate towards him. Since deadass the only person who’s showed him genuine love was Lyra.

When y’all first met, he’d always wear a massive ass bandage over the gash on his cheek.

Every time you saw it you gave him the ‘🤨’ look, which he’s just shrug it off. And when you’d ask him about it, he’d say something like:

“It’s ruh-rude to ask t-that.”

He’d even continue wearing it INTO your dating life, he’ll eventually cave in since it’s been around 8 months of him wearing it around you. And a wound would normally be healed by now.

He wasn’t at all surprised by your reaction of shock.

He’ll always have it on out of the apartment though. No exceptions.

He calls you ‘pretty thing’ sm it becomes a tic.

Eskimo kisses? Eskimo kisses.

He try’s his best to keep the whole murder part of his life away from you. But it’s obvious so… that was one long night of going over things.

Anywaysssss.

AQUARIUM DATES! Y’all get in your grandpa jumpers and walk around the aquarium holding hands and looking at all the cool fish n’ shit.

HE LOVES LOVES LOVES NECK KISSES.

He’s a slut for knowing he’s yours.

He loves teasing the shit outta you for being short. Even though he’s like 3 inches taller

“I’ve been b-breaking my bug-back k-k-kissing you, babe.”

“Piss off.”

He loves laying between your legs with his face flushed against your chest while you run your fingers through his hair and itch his scalp.

When you guys are sleeping, you’ll constantly have to make sure he doesn’t get too over headed or cold due to his CIPA.

Speaking of sleeping, he grinds his teeth while he’s dreaming. So just gently grab his chin to stop him. And he’s a deep ass sleeper so he won’t feel it lol.

He isn’t a big fan of PDA when you guys aren’t behind closed doors, but he’ll ALWAYS hold your hand.

On the less sappy note, when he’s having a tic attack he will not allow you to come near him. He’s so scared of hurting you.

And when he’s having an episode?

Make sure you stay calm. And maybe get to him before he gets to you. He’ll be so upset if he did hurt you while going through one of his schizophrenic like states.

To help him through his manic episode, stay as calm as you can, let him know that, although you don’t share the belief that it’s real, you understand that it is real to him. Try and keep focused on supporting him with how he’s feeling in that moment, rather than confirming or challenging his reality.

If he does snap at you, he’ll feel so guilty. He will think that he’s just like his dad.

He’ll probably disappear for a few days, but when he comes back he’s begging for you to not leave him. Like he’s full on sobbing.

Hold him.

He’s clingy. Like super clingy. Clingy to the point where it just becomes obnoxious. And gets a bit irritating but he means well :(

He loves you like a dog, and he’ll do anything for you. He trusts you with his whole being and hopes you feel the same.

✯.★*°•.°✯��.★*°°·.•°★•✯.★*°•.°✯•.★*°°·.•°★•

#ticci toby x reader #ticci toby headcanons #ticci toby #creepy pasta #creepypasta x reader #creepypasta reader #creepypasta headcanon #fluff

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froggibus · 1 year

Text

Stay A While - Jason Todd/Red Hood

Pairing: Jason Todd x reader

Genre: hurt/comfort, fluff w a shot of angst

Word Count: 2.4k

Summary: you’ve always been one to suffer in silence, shutting yourself in your apartment for the duration of your episodes. but Jason Todd doesn’t want to sit idly by and watch you suffer alone, even if it annoys you

CW: depressed! reader, mentions of depressive episodes, negative thoughts/self talk, Jason is overbearing, mentions of insomnia, reader struggles to eat, some violence (out on patrol), the rest of the family kinda sucks in this lmao

this is for the people who followed me expecting Batfam/DC content and didn’t unfollow when I didn’t post any for months 😭 I love y’all. also idk the idea of soft! Jason makes me so emotional. also I WOULD LOVE SOME DC OR BATFAM REQUESTS!!! if there’s anything you want me to write I will gladly do it 🫶🏼 (also let’s ignore the fact that this is like my 3rd angsty post in the past few days oops)

————

It was common knowledge around Wayne Manor that disappearing into your room (or apartment) for a few days meant something different for everyone. Usually, it wasn’t anything to worry about.

Sometimes it would be Tim finally sleeping when he’s pushed himself too far. Other times, it was Dick working a case and refusing to leave until he knew what to do. For Bruce, it usually meant he was injured and trying to hide it from everyone.

Jason was still finding these things out little by little, so when you suddenly disappeared into your apartment, he was worried.

“Honestly, it’s nothing to worry about,” Tim tried to ease his mind. “Y/n tends to retreat when things get bad.”

“And you guys are okay with that?”

Dick shrugged, adjusting the ice pack he had pressed to his forehead. “We tried the first time it happened. After a while, we realized that alone time is the only thing that really works. If y/n needs help, y/n will reach out.”

And the topic ended there. Or at least, it did for Dick and Tim. Jason couldn’t stop thinking about it though—did they really just let you suffer in your apartment all alone whenever you had an episode? The thought made his skin crawl.

He’s had a few bad episodes over the course of his life, and while he managed to deal with it alone, he didn’t think that you should have to.

Maybe that’s what led him to your apartment at four in the morning with a bag of takeout.

You open the door dressed in your pyjamas despite not having slept a wink. You're almost surprised to see Jason standing there with the paper bag. Didn’t everyone know to let you ride it out on your own? You thought they decided to stop bugging you ages ago.

Still, you don’t think it was fair to slam the door in his face, and instead welcome him inside. “What are you doing here, Jason?”

“Just thought I’d check on you,” he sets the bag on the counter. “Haven’t seen you in a while and wanted to make sure you’re okay.”

You squint at him. Did he really think you were that dumb? You figured he would have asked Dick or Bruce right away if you suddenly fell off the face of the earth, and they would have told him about your situation. Jason and you had never been particularly close, either, so why was he here?

He raises his hands in defeat. “I just want to make sure you’re taken care of somewhat. Alright? I’ll leave you alone after that.”

“I mean, I’m fine aren’t I?”

Your words come out harsher than you’d like, but you can’t help but be annoyed at the sudden intrusion. Not to mention the implication that you can’t take care of yourself.

“You clearly haven’t slept in a while so we both know that’s some bullshit.”

You sigh. He’s right, after all. You can’t remember the last time you slept, let alone for more than a few hours. Though used to staying up late on missions and patrols, you never went this long.

“I just have a lot on my mind, I guess,” you admit. “But I can take care of myself, Jason. So while I appreciate the concern, you can leave.”

He doesn’t protest, instead grumbling to himself while you show him to the door and effectively kick him out of your apartment. He stands outside the door for a while, wondering if he should try harder.

He decides against it, and thinks he’ll just have to check on you again tomorrow.

—

You almost feel guilty unpacking the takeout he got you, but then again, there weren’t many days lately where guilt and stress didn’t weigh heavily on you. As soon as you felt that familiar flood of negative thoughts and emotions, you knew it was time to withdraw. Still, through all of your episodes, you were yet to experience one quite this bad.

It’s nice that Jason checked on me, you think to yourself. At least someone thought of you. Sure, you’d told the others countless times over the years that solitude while you sort through your thoughts was imperative, and it was true. Regardless, it was nice to have someone check on you, even if it was annoying.

You dish yourself a plate of Chinese food and sit down on your couch, looking out at Gotham city through the window. It’s a dim, rainy night and the weather does nothing to help your mood. You find yourself picking at your food, having only a few bites before packing it up and leaving it in the fridge.

You didn’t eat much, but it’s a start.

—

Jason tries to push back the thoughts of you on patrol the next night, but he can’t. He just thinks of the bags that line your under eyes and the way your voice cracked when you said you were fine.

It’s only when he damn near loses an eye to a stray bullet that he realizes he can’t ignore it anymore. He ducks around a corner, ready to head back to his bike.

“Hood, where are you going?” Nightwing calls after him.

“I gotta go check on something!”

Red Robin scoffs, “y/n is a big kid, Todd. Just leave it alone.”

He shakes his head at the younger boy. He wants to argue with him but for once in his life, Jason Todd bites his tongue and turns the other cheek.

When you open the door, you’re unsurprised to see Jason Todd standing there in his Red Hood suit. “Jason?”

“Yeah, yeah,” he says, walking past you straight into your apartment. “I’m back.”

“I—welcome back?” You close the door behind him, spinning around on your heel and raising an eyebrow at the man in your living room.

“Look, I know I said I’d leave when I knew you were taken care of but I don’t—you’re not. Like, seriously, y/n, just talk to me.”

You sigh and take a seat on the couch. “Do you really want to listen?”

“Yes,” he says and sits down next to you, dropping his helmet on the cushion next to him. “If it helps you, I’ll listen til my damn ears bleed.”

His words are almost enough to bring a smile to your face, the muscles twitching almost painfully. You nod slowly, drawing your knees into your chest.

Jason analyzes your body language, seeing just how vulnerable and small you really are despite your usual front. He knows to tread lightly here.

“I—,” you tug on your hair slightly, trying to think of how to verbalise it. “Have you ever been so tired, like beyond tired, that you can’t sleep?”

He goes to speak, but thinks the better of it. You don’t need to hear about his own problems right now, but the truth is he has. He’s been where you are before—guilt and misery weighing so heavily on him that he can’t breathe.

“I don’t even know what triggered it. I was fine one day and then all of a sudden….” You gesture to your current state in hopes he gets the idea. “I really hate feeling like this,” tears prick at your eyes and your nose stings with every word, “but I’ve never really found a way to make it stop and—and—“

Jason is almost as surprised as you are when he sets a gloved hand on your shoulder. “Y/n,” his voice is soft, “it’s okay to feel this way.”

His touch helps ground you and you manage to take a deep, shaking breath. “I don’t want you to see me like this, Jason,” you say quietly, voice so soft he almost doesn’t hear.

“There’s no shame in the way you’re feeling.”

“I know that I just—can you just go? Please?”

He opens his mouth to speak, to argue with you, but thinks the better of it. You look so soft and sad and vulnerable. He doesn’t want to push his luck and push you further away from him.

He grabs his helmet and stands up. “Have a good night, y/n. I hope you manage to get some rest tonight.”

You watch Jason Todd walk out of your apartment door for the second night in a row.

—

Jason is surprised when his phone screen lights up with your picture while he’s on patrol. The last person he’d expect to call him at two in the morning was you, especially considering he hadn’t heard from you in a few days.

He tried to come and visit you the next night, but he couldn’t bring himself to knock at your door. Y/n’s tough, he thought to himself. You don’t need his help.

He can’t pick up the phone in the middle of a fight, though, and has to wait until the henchmen are in a pile on the ground. He doesn’t even retort to Damian’s comment on how long it took him to take them down—his mind too focused on you and what could possibly be wrong.

He pulls his phone out of his pocket, pressing redial on your number. Please be okay, he thinks.

You answer on the third ring, your voice sounding soft and defeated. “Jason?”

“Y/n? Is everything okay?”

“I-I just…” you sigh into the phone and Jason’s heart clenches at the sound. “I don’t really want to be alone right now.”

Jason considers this for only a second. “Alright, I’ll be there in 10.”

He hangs up the call and shoves his phone back into his pocket, making the walk back to his bike.

“Todd?” Robin says in his earpiece.

“Pipe down, brat. I have more important things to deal with tonight.”

“More important than protecting the city?” Nightwing says over the comms.

You have no idea, he wants to say. But he doesn’t, opting to turn off the ear piece and focus on getting to you as quickly as he can. He said he’d be there in 10 minutes, but he’s at your apartment door in 7.

You’re waiting at the door when he knocks, a blanket over your shoulders, curled in on yourself. As soon as you open the door, you’re wrapping your arms around him.

His suit is damp from the rain, soaking into your pyjamas and making you shiver. Still, you don’t let go of him. It’s been a particularly rough day, and you needed some company to combat the thoughts filling your head.

“Miss me?” He jokes.

You say nothing, content to hold him as close to you as possible. He rubs your back gently before wrapping his arms around you and half carrying you back into your apartment.

He closes the door behind him, awkwardly adjusting to hold you up with one arm. Not that it’s much of a struggle for him, considering he’s a lot bigger than you are.

He’s torn, he doesn’t want to let go until you do, but he wants to talk to you and figure out why you needed him so badly. Lucky for him, he doesn’t have to make that choice because suddenly you’re pulling away from him and tucking your hair behind your ears.

You look anywhere but him. “Um, thanks for coming…”

“Anytime.”

You try to think of something to say after that, anything to break the ice and explain yourself and not make this a huge waste of time for him. Before you can speak, though, Jason goes first.

“You don’t have to explain it to me if you don’t want to,” he says. “I know it’s hard.”

You nod slowly, every movement of your body feels sluggish and heavy. You got a few hours of sleep the other day, but only out of sheer exhaustion. Now, it seems the exhaustion is catching up.

“I’m just gonna…sit down,” you plop onto the couch cushion and pull your knees into your chest. You pat the cushion next to you, inviting him closer.

Jason takes off his helmet and jacket, laying them on the kitchen island before sitting next to you. “Have you slept much?”

You shake your head, resting your cheek on the cushion and looking into his eyes. “A few hours the other day but…nothing since.”

“Did you want to try while I’m here?”

His eyes are soft, a jarring contrast from his other features. It’s almost as if he’s pleading with you.

“Y-yeah, okay,” you slowly rise from the couch, your damp pyjamas clinging to your body. You usher for Jason to follow you to your room.

You dig through your drawers, looking for a pair of clean pyjamas. You settle on a t-shirt you stole from Dick ages ago and a pair of sweats you used for training. Jason looks away while you change, trying his best to respect your privacy despite the way his face heats up.

You crawl into your bed, trying to rearrange the messy comforter to cover your body. “Do you…is it okay if you lay with me? It only has to be until I fall asleep.”

Jason knows he’s pushing his limits, his heart racing at the thought of being in bed with you. He shakes the thoughts away—this is completely innocent. He’s just taking care of you.

“Yeah, I can stay a while.”

Jason lays down next to you, his broad frame taking up more than half of your bed. Your breath catches in your throat at his proximity, and his warmth draws you in. Somehow, for the first time in days, his presence is enough to let you relax.

Jason lays with you for some time, just staring at the back of your head while you cuddle your pillow. You must have fallen asleep at some point, because your breathing is even and your body is relaxed.

He smiles, it’s the most calm he’s seen you in days. He knows you’re sleeping now and he can leave, but he doesn’t want to. What if you wake up and he’s gone? He doesn’t want to risk upsetting you.

You roll over in your sleep, your head landing perfectly under his arm and on his chest. His breath hitches in his throat at the contact. He tries to adjust his body to make it as comfortable as possible for you to lay on him.

He wraps an arm around your waist, cradling you within his own body. Jason can’t help but think to himself in this moment that he’ll take care of you no matter what, even if you can’t take care of yourself.

#dc #dc universe #jason todd #jason todd x reader #jason todd x you #red hood #red hood x you #red hood x reader #jason todd angst #red hood angst #hurt/comfort #batfam #batman

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linhfoxmoive · 2 months

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Lil Guardsman!! - Except it’s a collision of all my sticky note doodles I drew instead of working lmao :)

Been watching Kubz Scouts play this game, and as he posted videos of it gradually the past few days I kept making doodles while anticipating for the next episode (I’m both sad and happy the series ended, but wahh 😭) and immediately from the first episode I found a character I just adored to bits!!

So she’s the first character I decided to draw reasonably enough, Lieutenant Stryker… 🥺💚

Then believe it or not, I drew Stryker once again!! 😩 (With the addition of Chloe, cause y’all, the crack ship potential between these two bro would be so funny 💀)

But then but then, I doodled Stryker again again except just chibified cause it’s easier/faster 🤯🤯

Also she’s basically saying “NUH UH.”

And I DREW STRKYER AGAIN AGAIN, AGAIN- With the addition of the two other royal advisors, yuh 😼👍

Stryker and Ashe arguing/fighting while Malcom is just there shouting random stuff, is the finest content I could ever ask for bro :’)

And you won’t believe this but then I drew Stryker for like, the 5th time for this week again ☺️ (This doodle is totally not directed towards me myself at all teehee)

And here’s the last doodle I finished today that I started around yesterday right before the last video Kubz Scouts made of the game, and I’m sure you’ll be expecting this-

But it’s Ashe!! Based off that one scene where she was talking about holding enemies close and friends closer to the point of kissing- AHAHA, did you think I would say that I drew Stryker again? That’s crazy bro, I wonder what gave that impression it’s almost like she’s my favorite character haha lmao (Yes I will keep posting doodles of just mainly Stryker after this, AND yes I’m going unhinged) 🤭

Ngl, loki I MIGHT digitalize some of these doodles cause drawing on paper is so easy to make mistakes on and hard to fix, so as soon as I get my tablet to work again uhm. Trust bro I totes got this 🥲

(Also beware of reading the tags, I yap too much in them as usual :’D)

#lieutenant stryker #councilwoman ashe #court jester malcom #chloe (lil guardsman)#IT’S MAINLY JUST STRYKER TO BE HONEST…#lil guardsman royal advisors #lil guardsman #fanart #doodle #but it's on paper this time woah traditional #also I swear I always never draw the main character lmao sorry Lil I’ll do you justice one day-#anyways the brainrot I have on this game and mainly Stryker let’s be real is both fueling and killing me HELPksof #also the royal advisors are hands down my favorite trio and probably characters in the whole game #plus the beloved fantastico hat man I can never forget him for I love him #it feels like it would be criminal of me to stop drawing fanart of them now..pls I need more fanart content bro 😭😭#okay thanks for listening to my yapping if you did byeebyebyeededownfph for another month or something-

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chirpsythismorning · 2 years

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Something we should definitely not overlook, because it feels relevant to birthdaygate, is the individual character posters for season 4.

There's actually even an interview with the Duffer Brothers, where they were asked about this theory:

Though, I should clarify, this interviewer got a few details wrong, as it appears Max was actually looking away from the camera, not directly at it. Not only that, but she also wasn’t the only one to do so. She was one out of four total...

Looking directly at the camera: El, Hopper, Murray, Will, Argyle, Steve, Dustin, Robin, (not shown above: Karen, Lucas, Erica, Nancy, Eddie)

Looking away from the camera, to their left: Joyce, Mike, Jonathon, Max

We could deduce that this visual choice was foreshadowing Max getting cursed by Vecna in season 4, and Matt did sort of elude to this in his response to the question, seeing as it was focused only on her. But what could this possibly mean for the other three then?

Initially, it didn’t seem like we got anything substantial enough in s4 that could have possibly paralleled Joyce, Mike and Jonathon to Max's situation, or even being cursed by Vecna like she did for that matter. Well, except—

I do find it interesting that the same episode we see Max slowly discover she has been cursed, in an episode literally titled 'Vecna's Curse', it's March 22nd, Will's birthday, and in real time we are seeing the three people who would definitely never forget Will's birthday, presumably forget.

Because undeniably, the first thing that crosses my mind when it comes to what could possibly connect these three characters with each other, is Will. He's what connects them all. But even more specifically, THIS scene below is what connects them all, a scene which, might I remind you, has a major emphasis on the word 'remember':

Joyce: Do you know what March 22nd is? It’s your birthday. YOUR birthday. When you turned 8, I gave you that huge box of crayons, do you remember that?

Jonathon: Do you remember the day dad left?

Mike: Do you remember the first day that we met?

Vecna:

Not only do I think this means that Vecna most likely took away these three's memory of Will’s birthday, I also think it means he took away this specific memory and all the memories mentioned within it.

If it's all coming full circle and everything leads back to Will, it would make sense that Vecna 'took notes' during this whole incident in 2x08. These memories and these specific people in Will's life played a role in thwarting Vecna's plans last time, so obviously, he's not going to give them the chance to do that again.

This also brings up some interesting questions:

Were those weird POV shots of the Cali gang, that looked oddly stalker-ish, meant to represent Vecna keeping a close eye on them, to make sure his plan was still in motion?

How long will this manipulation (curse) Vecna has on these three last? And to what extent? Will it all just come to a head right away in early season 5, at a moment when they're trying to save Will, but they inevitably fail because all of the relevant things that saved him last time, are now missing from their memories?

And last, but definitely not least, is it possible Mike wouldn’t have gone through with professing his love to El, the way that he did, even going as far as to say his life started the day he found her in the woods (the day Will went missing), if he had remembered already doing the exact same thing with Will…? If he had remembered the best thing he'd ever done was ask Will to be his friend? Because if this theory is correct y’all... MIKE DOESN'T REMEMBER!!!???

Well, that's all (for now)

Please be sure to check out this post if you haven't already, but even more importantly, scroll down to the bottom of that post, because there I have linked all the most incriminating evidence thus far.

And trust me, once you read all of it, it's pretty much undeniable.

I also hope this gives some validation to those of you out there who denied vehemently that Joyce, Mike or Jonathon could EVER possibly forget Will's birthday. Because you were right. Technically, they didn't. Technically it required an inter-dimensional monster for this to be possible at all. So props to ya'll and your faith in these characters! YOU WERE RIGHT!

#stranger things #will byers #stranger things meta #stranger things theory #birthdaygate #stranger things 5 #st5 headcanon #also hate to be the bitch to bring this up...#but you know how we always joked about how jonathon would be the only one to save will bc he knows his favorite song...#well.. in that scene in the shed back in s2... jonathon mentions that memory...#which means he doesn't remember #WHICH MEANS WILL IS FUCKED BASICALLY #yeah it might be good to go back and see everything they mentioned #because it's basically a free for all in terms of vecna swiping those memories right out of their brains #will byers im praying for you #that whole thing about s5 going back to s1 vibes has me scared...#but also there's a lot of foreshadowing that mike is in danger.?#so im not totally convinced he doesn't somehow mess up vecna's plan yet again...#maybe that's how him and will both end up stuck in the upside down together...#yes I will turn this around so it benefits me #what about it?

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vivalas-vega · 1 year

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new perspectives / part four / jake ‘hangman’ seresin

y’all this one is a doozy... I cried three separate times while writing it. I apologize in advance :( as always let me know what you think and if you want to be added to the taglist!

new perspectives / part four / jake ‘hangman’ seresin x reader

add yourself to my taglist

prologue - one - two - three

word count: 6.8k

warnings: language, drinking, angst !!!, this chapter is basically an episode of grey’s anatomy (which means lots of medical inaccuracies and lots of drama)

San Diego had thoroughly and completely captured your heart, you now spent your days during the mindless surgeries thinking back to the cloudless skies, relaxed people, and beautiful beaches… along with just a few people who made it so much better. That day after your first Hard Deck outing had consisted of hitting the touristy areas on your own during the morning, sitting on the beach exactly when the Daggers had told you to so you could very briefly see them in the air, and going out to their favorite food truck before you inevitably had to return back to Boston and when you did you felt yourself itching to head back west. You did what Jake had asked of you and (theoretically) kept your options open… you’d been quite the jetsetter this month as you visited hospitals in Seattle, Los Angeles, Austin and New Orleans and they were all just as interested in you as San Diego but they just couldn’t match what they were willing to invest in you and so you’d made your choice.

Jake had kept up his end of the promise and let you make the decision, but he didn’t seem as enthusiastic about it as you had hoped. It wasn’t that he was disappointed per se but it wasn’t the response you’d been banking on… you got that response from everyone else though, and Rooster and Phoenix had been incredible in helping you with your impending cross-country move. You’d sent them to house showings and spent countless hours on facetime as they walked you through house after house until all three of you unanimously decided on a beautiful Spanish revival home right in Coronado. Sure, it was a fixer upper and would require a lot of love and a lot of elbow grease but you saw the potential and all the Dagger’s had easily offered up their services to help you bring your vision to life.

Blake had been surprisingly great throughout the whole thing, you’d expected (and were kind of hoping) for him to cut and run when you’d told him your decision but he stayed… he’d looked through listings with you, helped you pack up your apartment and make several Goodwill runs, and even organized a going away party after your last official surgery at the bar near the hospital with all of your friends and favorite attendings. You really were expecting things to fizzle out once you told him you were moving but they didn’t, and as many times as you tried to tell him he didn’t have to stick around he was more than content to do so… you knew he saw a future with you but he also knew that you didn’t, and he was okay with that. He was content to just be in your bubble until he couldn’t, and no matter how badly you felt about hurting him he didn’t seem to mind.

Standing there in your empty apartment and overlooking the hospital from your bedroom window you were reminded of when you and Jake stood in exactly this spot all those years ago… so much had happened since then. You really truly became a doctor, you studied for and passed your intern exam, you completed your first solo surgery, you and your fellow residents just about went insane prepping for the boards. You learned who you were out here, and for that you would always love the city of Boston but you wouldn’t necessarily miss the accents or that faint smell of the harbor that seemed to waft for blocks.

“Hey, I’m glad I caught you,” you heard Blake say, turning to see him cautiously entering through your open front door and you gave him a small smile.

“Just taking a moment before I head to the airport,” you said and he nodded, closing the distance between you with a thin black box in his hand that you were terrified was a necklace or a bracelet.

“A little going away present,” he said and you took it carefully.

“You’ve already done so much, you really didn’t have to get me anything,” you said as you opened the lid and let out a soft gasp… it was a beautiful black and gold Montblanc pen with Dr. Jupiter engraved along the side and you looked at him with wide eyes. “Blake…”

“Congratulations, you’re truly an incredible doctor and I would have been remiss if I let this moment pass by without properly celebrating it.” he said as you wrapped your arms around him and your phone dinged as you pulled away letting you know your car was here… he seemed to understand as you looked up at him and nodded, reaching around you to grab your carryon. “Come on, I’ll walk you down.”

“Thank you… for the pen and for just sticking around these last few weeks,” you said as you strolled through your lobby.

“Thank you for letting me,” he said, closing you into the car and you looked through the open window at him for a moment before grabbing him by the collar and pulling him down to meet your lips for a chaste kiss. You had briefly wished that you could envision a life here with him, he was sweet and predictable and stable, but you couldn’t... this wasn’t your story or your life, you had a new life awaiting you in San Diego.

“You’re a really great guy, Blake. I’m sorry I couldn’t be what you needed,” you said and he just smiled.

“Don’t be. Now get out of here, go be extraordinary and don’t forget sunscreen… I look forward to reading your groundbreaking papers in the medical journals,” he said, tapping on the hood of the car to signal your driver and you gave him a soft wave as he faded into the distance.

“You’re here!” Phoenix had squealed as you climbed out of Jake’s truck in front of your new home and she all but tackled you to the ground in a hug that soon all the Dagger’s had joined in on. They led you inside and gave you a tour because frankly… they knew it a lot better than you did and you laughed as you saw paint swatches along a living room wall and looked at Jake questioningly.

“She threatened to shoot me out of the sky if I didn’t give her the keys after I picked them up,” he said, gesturing to Phoenix.

“We have to hit the ground running! I picked some colors based on the inspiration photos you sent,” she said, walking you through each one and definitely not being unbiased as she did.

“I don’t mind, I’m clearly going to need all the help I can get.” you said, and after a tequila shot toast to the new place they all started to leave one by one to give you some time to settle in and rest after your long day. Before Rooster had left he showed you to the rather exquisite temporary bedding situation he’d set up for you, saying something about the best air mattress on the market and if you ruin my camping supplies I’ll kill you and just as you and Phoenix were wrestling to open a champagne bottle for mimosas and your first official remodeling planning session Jake came into the kitchen and took you by surprise.

“Well, you two ladies enjoy your planning session, I’ll see you tomorrow when the movers arrive, yeah?” he said, moving towards the door and you and Phoenix shared a look before you chased after him and caught him on the front porch.

“You’re not staying?” you asked and he shook his head. “Come on, we can’t break a time honored Jake and Jupiter tradition, we’re supposed to get drunk and order takeout and have a sleepover in the new place.”

“It’ll be good for you two to spend some one on one time together… go, get champagne drunk and plan out the house. I’ll be here when the moving truck gets here,” he said, pressing a kiss to your forehead and you watched as he got in his car and drove away. With a sigh you walked through the front door and grabbed a red solo cup full of champagne from Phoenix.

“What’s his deal?” she asked, taking a sip and looking at you over the rim of her own cup.

You sighed dramatically, “he thinks I made the decision to move here solely because of him and he’s being a real sourpuss about it.”

“Isn’t this supposed to be a good thing? You guys have been fighting an uphill battle for years with the distance and the careers… you guys are solid now, you’re a fellow, he’s got a permanent station. I thought you guys would be putting rings on it and making babies by now,” she joked.

“At the very least practicing making babies…” you said despondently and she raised an eyebrow at you. “It’s… been a hot minute and I just… god, every time I look at him I want to climb him like a tree.”

“Disgusting,” she muttered and you narrowed her eyes at her, “sorry, for two minutes I will pretend there is a world in which I can find Hangman sexually appealing,” she said, clearing her throat. “I hear you, girlfriend. I too would like to climb him like a tree,” she said and you just laughed as you grabbed the champagne bottle and walked down the hallway to your bedroom where the two of you settled onto the air mattress. “Just make a move, I doubt he’d object, he was staring at your ass the entire time we were doing the toast.”

You chuckled, “I don’t know, it’s just a little weird… I mean, we’ve talked about us before, lots of tortured pining stuff and wondering if we’d ever get a shot again and now we have one and it feels awkward. What am I supposed to do, just plant one on him then boom we’re back together?”

“If you wanna speed things along you could flirt with Rooster,” she said and you gave her a look that said be for real, right now. “I’m serious! Those two are good now, what with the whole saving your life seconds before you got blown to smithereens thing, but there’s still some deep-seated competition there, spark it and I guarantee you’ll get your hot hot Hangman sex,” you just shook your head, playfully shoving her shoulder before grabbing your laptop.

“That feels mean to Roo, caught him staring at my ass too,” you laughed, “if things were different though I would like to take that mustache for a ride…” you said, watching as she gagged.

“Stop being a horndog about my coworkers and pull up the spreadsheet,” she said, and the two of you spent the evening switching between Excel and Pinterest, making detailed plans for each room of the house and figuring out what order you wanted to go in. You briefly thought to yourself that Phoenix had a backup career in interior design if she ever grew tired of the pilot life but you knew that was about as likely as you ever putting your scalpel down. When the rest of the squad showed up the following morning, much too vibrant and loud for the state of your hangovers, you got the house unpacked in record time and by the time the sun was setting and casting a beautiful orange glow through your windows you had something that sort of resembled a home… if you looked past the terrible carpeting that needed to be removed and the questionable paint colors the previous owners had chosen. But that was all fine, this house was yours… really truly yours and you could do whatever you wanted with it because it was going to be your home for a very long time.

Work was everything you’d hoped it would be, your colleagues were amazing and they happily showed you how things worked… you had a few habits to break from your time at Mass Gen and they were more than understanding of the adjustment period you required but the biggest adjustment was getting used to not having to check in with an attending every time you wanted to rush someone off for surgery. Sure, as a fellow you still required supervision but they trusted you. After one week of a tight leash they realized you were more than capable of handling things on your own and when you weren’t in your office working closely with the Head of Trauma on your pilot program you were running the ER, something you could just feel in your bones was what you were meant to do. You thrived on the high pressure situations, on taking charge and dictating patient care and quickly you became the favorite superior to the residents and interns. You took the extra step to teach them, and you threw them into the deep end time after time which in turn made them better doctors and better equipped to handle patients.

One of the interns had joked and said you should be called Venus instead of Jupiter… something about being harsh and volatile but you took it as a compliment. Your new Chief had concerns about your method of teaching, said that things weren’t as cutthroat here as they were in Boston but he saw an immediate improvement in the interns. They were logging more OR hours and working great under pressure, something they had struggled with before you arrived and you felt satisfied to know you had so easily slipped into your new hospital's ecosystem and were making it better while they made you better.

Things were still distant with Jake, and you honestly felt like you were still across the country as you maintained your friendship… you hadn’t been expecting to jump in his arms the second your plane touched down for a romcom worthy reunion but you had at least expected something to happen by now. You’d been here for almost two months and nothing. You’d wanted to corner him, have a conversation about where you guys were at but there was never an opportunity with both of your schedules and all of the free time you did have was being spent with the rest of the Daggers who couldn’t take a hint because they honestly assumed the two of you had gotten back together and were just being respectful of PDA in their presence.

“How about another duet?” Rooster asked, leaning on the table you were currently sitting at and encroaching your personal space as he wiggled his eyebrows at you and you just shook your head.

“It’s going to take about five more tequila shots before that happens, Roo,” you said and he was off to the bar as you shouted after him, “that wasn’t an invitation!”

“You shouldn’t have humored him that night,” Phoenix said with a laugh, “he could never rope anyone in before and now you’ve set a precedent for yourself.”

“Any cool cases today, Jupiter?” Fanboy asked, snagging the seat next to you and you gave him a wide smile. You loved having him around, whereas everyone else listened to you talk about work because you were their friend and they cared, they weren’t the biggest fans of the gory details, but not Fanboy. He wanted you to tell him everything in great detail, he said you were like a real life superhero and you would take him stroking your ego any day of the week if it meant you got to brag about your cool surgeries.

“Actually yes,” you said, rolling your eyes at Rooster as he set a tequila shot in front of you, but you took it anyway. “We had two patients come in today stuck together… take a guess at how they were stuck.”

“Oh god, superglue?”

You shook your head, “I wish, and honestly so did they. His uh… prince albert hooked onto her IUD during intercourse,” you said and he burst out laughing.

“I’m sorry, what?” Rooster said, and you turned to realize everyone had been listening in.

You nodded, “weirdest x-ray of my life. Wasn’t surgical which was a bummer but I basically acted as their post-coitus cruise director while I watched the imaging and navigated them out.”

“Every time I talk to you I have something new to fear,” Coyote said and you turned to narrow your eyes at him.

“And why would this be something for you to fear? Got some jewelry below the belt, Coyote?” you asked and everyone snickered while he stammered and said no before walking to the bar with his tail between his legs.

“Need a new opponent?” you asked, approaching the pool table as Jake reset and he gave you a small smile as he nodded.

“Could never say no to you, just don’t whine to me when you lose,” he said, passing you a cue and you scoffed.

“You forget who’s dad taught you how to play,” you shot back, giving him a smirk before he let you break. You went back and forth, keeping the game pretty even as you both tried to come out on top and you faltered when you felt your phone ringing in your back pocket, pulling it out to see an incoming call from Jake’s father. You looked up at him as he was surveying the table for his next shot and passed your pool cue to Rooster, “take over for me? I’ll be right back.”

“John? What’s going on?” you answered as you stepped out onto the patio, you were close with Jake’s parents and always had been, but they never called you outside of the time you scheduled every other week to catch up.

“Hey JJ,” he said, and you smiled at the nickname of your nickname he’d given you. “Are you with Jake?”

“Yeah, but I stepped away… is everything okay?” You could feel yourself starting to grow anxious and you tried to tamp it down.

“It’s Mary…” he said and your heart stopped in your chest before taking off in a dead sprint, “it’s uh… well, it’s not good, JJ, and we need you.” He filled you in on everything that had happened, after a few months of horrible migraines their county hospital had finally ordered a head CT which revealed a brain tumor and you could feel anger radiating throughout you. If someone had shown up in your ER several times complaining of persistent headaches the first thing you would have done was order a CT, but that was something for you to deal with later. “The doctors here… they’ve got a pretty good plan but, well we know you’re not a neurosurgeon but didn’t you spend some time in that department as a resident?”

“I did, about two years with Dr. Adams, he was the Head of Neuro… tell her doctors you want digital copies of all of her imaging and send them over to me, I’ll look them over. Jake doesn’t know, does he?” you asked, looking through the window and watching as he laughed with Rooster.

“No… I’m sorry to put all of this on your plate, JJ… we know how busy you are, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it, and well… you’re a doctor, you know how to tell people things like this.” he said and you understood, though you didn’t necessarily agree. You knew how to tell people things like this, not Jake.

“I’ll tell him and we’ll be on the first flight out, okay? I’ll look over the scans as soon as you send them and I’ll talk with her doctors, we’ll figure this out.” you said before hanging up and you took a moment to yourself to feel your feelings before going in there and shattering Jake’s world. This moment was all you got, you knew what John and Mary were asking of you. They could never keep up with you anytime you talked about work, hell Mary had called you one day to have you help her pick the right cold medicine (when she really needed allergy medicine). This wasn’t their strong suit, and that was okay, but this was different than colds or allergies. You knew they were throwing big words at them and overwhelming them with medical information they weren’t equipped to decipher, and you knew they were asking you to step in to make it all make sense and make decisions on their behalf.

This moment was all you got to feel devastated by the news, to mourn the fact that Mary, someone you considered to be your other mother, was going through something as awful as this. She was who you turned to when you didn’t feel comfortable going to your own mom… she was there when you walked into her bedroom with Jake’s sweater wrapped around your waist asking her what you’re supposed to do about periods, and she was there when you lost your virginity to a boy who didn’t really give a damn about you (or not getting you pregnant) and you needed someone to take you to get the morning after pill. She held your hand tight when Jake shared the news of his acceptance into the Academy and she bought you the stethoscope you still wore around your neck when you graduated from med school. You took a deep breath, straightened your back and wiped your tears. If John and Mary needed you to be a doctor for them right now, then that’s what you would do. You would make sure that she received the best care she possibly could, because that’s what she deserved.

“Jake?” you asked, stepping up to the pool table and he brushed you off for a moment, saying something about securing his win against you and Rooster and you waited, ignoring the way Phoenix and Coyote were looking at you right now. They could tell you had been crying, and they could feel by the energy radiating off of you that something was wrong, and Jake knew it too the second he turned around.

“What is it?”

“You should, uh… you should come with me,” you said, trying to pull him somewhere private but as he looked down at you, his Jupiter who was always so brave and calm in the face of everything, he couldn’t wait another second and you sighed. “I just got off the phone with your dad, your mom has been diagnosed and admitted for a brain tumor, we need to go home.” you said, trying to keep it brief and factual but you knew that wouldn’t help as his face fell. You turned to Coyote who was eagerly awaiting for you to tell him how he could help. “I need you to take him home, get a bag packed. I’m going to call Maverick and my boss, get all of that sorted, and get us booked on the next flight out. I'll be there to get him as soon as we’re ready to go.” you said and he nodded. You wrapped your arms around Jake and whispered in his ear, “it’s going to be okay, I promise.” You kissed his cheek and nodded to Coyote and you felt tears well in your eyes as you watched them go.

“Sit down, take a second,” Bob said, pulling out a chair for you and you let your body be moved by him, you didn’t feel like you were really here, this felt like it was a really bad dream. You felt a hand on your knee and you looked up to see Rooster in front of you.

“Don’t worry about Maverick, I’ll call him and let him know, okay?” he said and you nodded, whispering a thank you as he stepped away.

“What can I do?” Phoenix asked and you nodded to your purse on the table.

“Take my wallet, use the blue card… get us booked on the next flight to Austin?” you asked and she was already on the move. You snapped back to reality and pulled out your phone, calling your Chief and letting him know you needed some personal time and he granted you as much as you needed, and told you he’d have your neurosurgeon on standby if you felt you needed to transfer her. You felt like everything was moving in a blur, you thanked everyone as you grabbed your stuff and left the bar, telling them you’d give them an update when you could and you didn’t even remember what you’d packed, you just knew you’d thrown some stuff in a bag before you parked your car at Jake’s and you don’t think you’d ever experienced silence so suffocating as Coyote drove you to the airport. Jake hadn’t said a word since you’d told him and you couldn’t blame him, you couldn’t really find what to say either and you almost didn’t hear him on the plane when he’d muttered, “I don’t know what to do.”

Your head snapped towards him and you rested a hand on his knee, “you don’t have to do anything. Don’t worry about the medical stuff, I’ll take care of it all… just be there for her,” you said and he nodded softly. “I’m sure she’ll feel a lot better when she sees this handsome face,” you said, resting a hand on his cheek briefly and he cracked a smile. It was small but it was there, and you’d take it. “As soon as we land I’m going to talk with her doctors, figure out what the plan is and we’ll go from there. My Head of Neuro has her scans and is looking them over, and once I figure out what they’re recommending I’m going to talk with Dr. Adams and get his opinion. We’ll transfer her to San Diego or Mass Gen if we have to, but I have a good feeling about this.”

“The golf ball.” he said, and you cocked your head in confusion. “That day I called you in the bar you told me about the golf ball tumor you and Dr. Adams removed, you said you shouldn’t have been able to and you did.”

You nodded, “we did, and hers is a lot smaller… The only concern here is the location.” you said and he nodded.

When you touched down in Austin and made the drive out to the county hospital you did exactly what you said you would. You pulled her doctors into a conference room and went over every inch of her case after Mary gave them permission to loop you in on her care. For two hours you argued, you felt like you were going against a brick wall and the weight resting on your shoulders felt unbearable but you would bear it if it meant it wasn’t on John and Mary… they had sacrificed so much for you and Jake, and Jake… you felt bad leaving him out of this, you were acutely aware of the way he was pacing just outside the door, looking through the small window every so often to try and gauge what was going on but he didn’t need to hear any of this. He didn’t need to hear you call her doctors incompetent, he didn’t need to hear you yell at them over how long it took to order a head CT, he didn’t need to hear you call her tumor complex and smart, and he didn’t need to hear you walk them through how it could be removed.

“With all due respect, you’re a trauma surgeon, not a neurosurgeon, and we’ve elected to follow a course of chemotherapy and radiation,” her doctor, Dr. Franks said and you just rolled your eyes.

“With all due respect, I studied for two years under the Head of Neuro at Mass Gen which as far as I’m concerned makes me a hell of a lot more qualified than you, and you haven’t elected to do anything. The patient has withheld consent on any further treatment until I provide my opinion and in my professional opinion this tumor can be removed,” you argued and he shook his head. You were growing frustrated and you checked your watch, confirming the time in Boston and you dialed Dr. Adams and set your phone on the table as it rang. “Dr. Adams, sorry to cut to the chase but did you receive the scans I sent you?”

“Yes, this tumor is encroaching on Broca’s Area and I don’t like the growth I’m seeing between last week's scan and this week’s, is the patient exhibiting symptoms?”

“None beyond headaches, but we don’t have a lot of time before she does.” You could tell the other doctors in the room were annoyed, and frankly you would be too if a doctor that didn’t work in your hospital barged in guns blazing and criticizing your every move on a case but you also knew that beneath the annoyance you would understand.

“I agree, my main concern here with surgery is damaging the area and impacting her ability to speak but I do think that’s the best way to move forward here.”

“Dr. Franks, would you like to fill Dr. Adams in on your recommended course of treatment?” you asked, gesturing to him as if to say the floor is yours.

“Given the proximity to Broca’s Area we have decided chemotherapy and radiation is the best option for this patient,” he said and you rolled your eyes.

“That’s all you're suggesting? Chemo and radiation will give her maybe another year, and it’ll be the worst year of her life. Jupiter, my recommendation here is to transfer her to UCSD, Dr. Lewis will do it. I’ll make the call for you,” he said and you thanked him as you hung up.

“I’m going to go speak with the patient, but as far as I’m concerned you should start processing her discharge.”

“You can’t just storm in here and order a transfer,” Dr. Franks protested and you scoffed.

“I can when you’re giving your patient a death sentence, process the discharge.” you said, storming out of the room and nearly colliding with Jake.

“J, talk to me. What’s going on?” he asked as you were already halfway down the hallway.

“We’re transferring her to UCSD, I have to go speak with the patient and get her-”

“The patient?” Jake asked in disbelief and you softened, turning back to face him.

“I’m sorry,” you said, placing your hands on his cheeks, “I’m sorry, that was… I just have to refer to her that way right now, your parents want me in charge here and if I’m going to act in her best interest I need to approach this as a doctor.”

He removed your hands from his face but kept a tight grip on them and you could see that he didn’t understand, “that’s not the patient, Jupiter, that’s my mom.” he said, voice breaking.

“I know. Jake, I know who it is, and you don’t have to understand but right now this is about her and what she needs, and she’s asked for me to handle this… I’m sorry, but I do need to go update her on what’s going on,” you said, giving him a pleading look and when you could see it was no use you turned and walked down the hallway towards her room.

“Hey Mary, how are you feeling?” you asked and she gave you a bright smile as you briefly looked over her chart again to read her latest vitals.

“Better now that the two of you are here,” she said, and you looked to the doorway to see Jake leaning against the frame as you sat on the edge of her bed.

“You were gone a long time, what’s the verdict?” John asked.

“We’re setting up a transfer to UCSD,” you said and her eyes widened, “this is not a reflection upon your team here,” it definitely was, “however your tumor is a little more complex than this hospital is used to seeing and I want you getting the best of the best. I think it says a lot about you that even your tumor is wicked smart, which means you need a wicked smart surgeon to take it out and that would be Dr. Lewis, he was actually mentored by my mentor in Boston from that minute I wanted to be a neurosurgeon.” you said and she smiled softly.

“So he’s good?” she asked.

“One of the best, hell I’d even let him cut my head open,” you joked and you smiled when she laughed. “I’m going to check in with my boss in San Diego and see how we’re doing on that transfer, okay?” you asked and she nodded as you made your way to the door.

“Jupiter?” she called, and you stopped as you stood next to Jake and you didn’t miss the way he took a step back, “thank you… for taking care of this. I know how busy you are and I know you must be pulling a lot of strings for me-”

“You hush, Mary.” you said, feeling tears prick at your eyes. “You’re family. Nothing is more important right now,” you said, giving her another smile as you left the room. You felt just slightly reassured at how your colleagues, past and present, were making this as much of a priority to them as it was to you, and you thanked your Chief about a dozen times when he let you know he was sending the hospital’s plane for you and it’d be arriving in a few hours.

“Hey, that plane is designated for medical emergencies and this qualifies. I’m not doing you any favors,” he said and you chuckled.

“You are and you know it, I’ll see you soon.” you said as you hung up and you gave Jake a smile as he approached that wasn’t reciprocated.

“She’s resting… dad went to grab their stuff from the house,” he said and you nodded.

“They’re processing the discharge, we’ll be out of here as soon as the plane gets here,” you said as you sat in one of the waiting room chairs and he followed.

“I’m scared, J,” he said and you turned to fully face him as you pulled his hands into your lap.

“I know, I am too… but we’ve got this, okay? Dr. Lewis is great, I haven’t had a chance to speak with him yet and go through the approach but we’ll make a plan as soon as we land and he’s had a chance to meet with her-”

“Got it.” he said, standing abruptly, “I’m going to go sit with her while we wait.” You let out a sigh and hung your head in your hands for a moment before pulling out your phone and dialing your own mom.

“Sweetheart? It’s early, is everything okay?” she answered and you felt a wave of emotion crash over you.

“Mom…” you started, voice breaking. “I’m home,” you said.

“Home? What do you mean, where are you?” you could already hear her shouting to your father and the jingle of keys in the background.

“I’m at the county hospital with Jake’s family, it’s Mary… I need-” you said, but cut yourself off as your throat grew thick.

“We’ll be there in ten minutes,” she said before disconnecting and you quickly made your way down to the lobby, not wanting to be near his family right now. You paced back and forth, damn near wearing a hole in the tile, and when you heard the hiss of the automatic doors opening and saw your parents for the first time in almost six months you nearly collapsed.

“Oh honey,” your mom said, both of them running over and wrapping themselves around you, sandwiching you between them as you let yourself break.

“Shh, it’s okay, baby,” your dad said as you tried to tell them what was going on. “Just take a deep breath,” he said, pulling away to wipe your tears. You felt like a little kid again, like you were six years old as you wept in your dad’s arms.

“I just… I know I do this every day, I make life and death decisions for people all the time but this is… I mean if we’re wrong? If we’re just a bunch of cocky surgeons playing god and this doesn’t go the way we think it will? I promised them, I broke the one golden rule of medicine and I made promises to people,” you said, succumbing to another wave of tears. “And I can’t do this,” you said, trying to pull yourself together. “I can’t do this up there. Jake’s mad at me because he doesn’t understand why I’m acting like a doctor right now but this… I can’t break down like this because they asked me to be a doctor, I’m supposed to handle this.”

“You’re handling it the best you can,” your mom said, rubbing her hands along your arms soothingly.

“You’re in your pajamas,” you said, letting out a watery laugh. “I woke you, I’m sorry,” you said and your mom let out a soft laugh.

“We were actually watching Jeopardy, did you know they put that on Netflix?” she asked and you laughed again.

“Besides, I don’t care what time it is. You need us, you call,” your dad said and you nodded, leading them to the elevators and telling them they should stop in before you left.

“You’re leaving?” your mom asked as the doors closed.

“Taking her to UCSD,” you answered, “this right here is why I’m working on that rural health program… this could have gone so much smoother, she could have been diagnosed weeks ago.” you said with a sigh, and when the doors opened and Jake turned from looking through the glass window to his mothers room to see the three of you, his face twisting in pain as he looked at your father, you knew he felt like he was a little kid again too. Your dad was down the hall in an instant, wrapping his arms around him as Jake fell apart. What Jake’s mom was to you, your father was to him… he was there for Jake when he couldn’t go to his own dad.

You all sat around Mary’s bed, laughing and catching up, enjoying the fact that the six of you were all in the same place for the first time in years despite the circumstances, and you were currently in a fit of hysterics as you discovered both of your parents had joined a bowling league to fill their time.

“We’re empty nesters! Leave us alone,” Mary protested as you and Jake laughed.

“Do you have matching shoes?” you asked, and you took their silence as a yes. You all said your goodbyes as you prepared to head to the airstrip, and you watched as your parents spoke with his quietly. You were glad they had each other, remained close even when they didn’t have the two of you to force them into each other’s lives. It always helped knowing that while you and Jake were busy saving lives and saving the world, too preoccupied to make it home for every birthday or holiday, they had each other to lean on. As you sat next to Jake’s mom on the plane, not missing the way Jake wasn’t making eye contact as he sat with his father, you felt her nudge your shoulder.

“He’ll get over it,” she said and you gave her a questioning look. “We put a hell of a problem on your plate… and for that I’m sorry, but it’s easier for him to be mad at you right now.”

You nodded, “I know. I want to say I’m used to it because in a way I am… patient’s family members treat me like the enemy all the time… but, I’m not used to him treating me this way.” you said sadly, “but you do not get to be sorry for this. I would have put this on my plate even if you hadn’t asked,” you said, turning to look at her.

“I know. That’s just who you are, Jupiter… you take the brunt of everyone else’s problems so they don’t have to deal with it. John and I are so proud of the woman you’ve become,” she said and you felt tears prick at your eyes. “But right now you need to get some sleep, stop worrying about the problems for now.”

You shook your head, “that’s okay, I’m fine… I was going to go over your case a little more before we land so I’m ready for my meeting with Dr. Lewis,” you said and she just shook her head, pushing the arm rest out of the way and lifting her arm for you.

“Come on, get some rest. You’ve been taking care of me since before you got here, just… let me take care of you for a little while, okay?” she said and you nodded as you curled into her side and you felt like a blanket of security had been wrapped around you when you did. The exhaustion hit you like a freight train, you were realizing now that you hadn’t slept in over a day and as sleep tugged at the edges of your mind you did your best to set aside everything that was going wrong and just trust that it would all work out.

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taglist: @mamaskillerqueen @clancycucumber230 @the-romanian-is-bae @dempy @alldaysdreamers @zzsloth @emma8895eb @novagreen04 @classyunknownlover @olliepig @purplevortexx @mayhemmanaged @ohgodnotagainn (if your username is struck through it means I couldn’t tag you - sorry!)

#jake hangman seresin #jake hangman seresin fan fiction #jake hangman seresin x reader #jake hangman seresin x you #jake seresin #jake seresin fan fiction #jake seresin x reader #jake seresin x you #hangman #hangman fan fiction #hangman x reader #hangman x you #top gun maverick #top gun fan fiction

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riatheghoul · 2 months

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And If You Were My Little Girl

Pairing: Bang Chan x Black Reader

Song: Daddy Issues By The Neighborhood

Warnings: fluff and angst(idk if you count this as angst but i do) also unedited

Word count: 627

Disclaimers: I do NOT own any of these picture credits to the owners and this is PURE FICTION

Tag list: @cookiesdiaryx

The soft knock at the door was only answered by the soft music playing from your headphones. You were trying to use the music to drown out your thoughts, but they just kept coming you’re a failure, you’re not good enough, you’re not built for this. You finally let the tears that were welling up in your heart fall from your eyes and onto the notebook that was open to a half empty page of earth science notes you still have yet to finish studying for the exam on Monday.

You hadn’t realized that you were crying so loud until the headphones were ripped out of your ears while your chair was being pulled from under your desk and turned toward the mysterious alone time snatcher. You looked up at the person that invaded your loneliness and realized it was your boyfriend chan. The concern on his face was at a level that you’d never seen before. He cupped your chin “I need you to breathe for me baby, can you do that?” All you could do was nod as you began to take slow deep breaths with his aid of course to help calm you down.

After your heart that you didn’t even realize was beating so fast slowed you gave a weak smile to him a held his hand not only just to feel him but for moral support. “When did you get here?” taking a breath he answered “I tried knocking on the front door and your roommate let me in after a few minutes then I asked where you were that just pointed to your room” he gave your hand a soft reassuring squeeze and continued “then I knocked on the door a few times and when you didn’t answer I opened it and I heard your music through your headphones so I’m thinking oh she’s probably just doing school work but then you started crying and I immediately knew something wasn’t right”

A tear fell onto your leg and that was the start of it all. You started apologized and saying that you should have answered the door for him and all he could do was look at you with such sadness and admiration. The fact that you thought so much of him but so little of yourself at times astounded him. He reached under your legs and gathered some strength to pick you up and place you facing him on his lap. “No baby no you have no reason to be apologizing to me at all” he reassured rubbing your back “talk me through it. tell me what happened.” You took a deep breath “I was doing some notes then my brain started being an asshole like usual and making me think that I don’t deserve to be here, like I don’t deserve what I worked my ass off for.”

He wiped the tears that fell from your eyes kissing your forehead and leaving his lips there for a few seconds just to make sure you really feel him. His presence. “You deserve this. Do you hear me?” you nodded “You. Deserve. This.” He said a second time just to make sure that it sank in. He gave you a small peck on the lips and pulled you in holding your body until he heard soft snores. He got up slowly hoping not to wake you and laid you down on your bed. He covered you with your blankets before turning of the music that was playing in the background and the lamp on your desk before taking of his shoes and getting comfortable in your bed,

He pulled you as close as he physically could mentally vowing to never let you go, humming softly to you to help you sleep.

A/N: i wrote this last night after having a good cry about school. I’m in college and it’s getting very hard to keep my grades a float. All i could do was watch old channie’s room episodes and cry I hope y’all don’t hate me too much for being gone for so long lol. Ok byeeee~

p.s. i was thinking about the song daddy issues by the neighborhood when i was writing this so that why the title is what it is

#skz fluff #stray kids fluff #bang chan x reader #bangchan x black reader #x black reader #black! reader #bang chan fluff #bang chan comfort #skz comfort #stray kids comfort

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fizzigigsimmer · 5 months

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Fargo Season 5: Gator Speculation

Y’all I am starting to fear for this man’s life. 😂 If you have not watched episode 5 yet, warnings for spoilers ahead.

So my theory that Gator and Dot may have previously been romantically involved went from an itch based on tiny clues that might have been circumstantial, to a full on burn last night.

Up until now we haven’t had any confirmation of Dot/Nadine’s age. The actress is only a few years older than Joe, but Hollywood is notoriously gross about women not looking their age, so it was entirely possible Juno was playing much older than she actually is. But now we know Dot was a teenager when she was brought into Roy’s little cult and when she married him.

For me that pretty much confirms that she and Gator are peers, and that he was a teenager when his father married a child near his own age. 🤢

Another thing that went from an itch to a burn for me: During the home invasion, when Dot first sees Gator she says “shame on you there’s a baby in this house”. This struck me because it’s the first time that I can recall Dot using such infantile language to refer to her daughter. While it’s not strange at all or uncommon for people to infantilez children in general, typically that kind of perspective becomes part of your regular speech patterns. “Gotta get home to my babies” that sort of thing. But to my memory Dot has always referred to Scotty with very particular language, possessive language at that. Scotty is always her child, her cub - and they even have her remind us there isn’t anything a mother lion wouldn’t do to protect her cub.

Dot might have chosen to refer to Scotty as a baby in that moment out of calculation, in the hopes that it would prick Gator’s conscience - which naturally infers that she has reason to believe he has one to work over. It also can’t be ruled out either that the specific use of the word baby was an unconscious slip, due to her shock and the vulnerability of the moment. Because the last time she saw Gator she was pregnant with what might be his baby.

The other hint we got this week is Dot confirming that Roy is an abusive piece of shit. She says something along the lines of what is obvious about Roy - that when he’s happy and feels in control things were good, but the minute he feels challenged or insecure he’d hit her and climb all over her just to feel strong again. Only when she’s describing this behavior she specifically uses the word ‘they’. They don’t hit you at first. “They” turn on you and push you down when they need to feel strong.

Now of course, Dot could just be talking about men in general. Men like Roy. But well, Gator IS a man like Roy. He’s desperately trying to walk in his father’s shoes and be all of the things he’s not, and he lashes out on other people to build himself up. We know from his own lips what he did to another teenager who accidentally injured him during a high school football game and stole his (most likely imagined) future in football. Given how close he and Dot are in age and all the hints that we have that he feels something for her, I think it’s highly likely that something happened between them.

I think it’s very possible that they connected, and were able to be vulnerable with each other. Gator seems just as surprised that Dot has become a “tiger” as Dot was that he has become his daddy’s lacky. I think in the past, at first they were able to find comfort in each other and things were good but eventually Gator did something that scared Dot and she decided to run.

At this point, I am confident at the very least that Gator’s feelings for/about Dot are romantic. Whether or not Dot has ever reciprocated them is still 50/50 for me. Regardless I think Gator held a candle for her and that as the tensions rise in the final episodes and he sees just how far Roy is willing to go to hurt and control her it’s going to force him to take a hard look at Roy, the kind of man and father he is, and really ask himself if that’s what he wants to be.

The part that scares me is Roy. Because when he’s in control and he feels like he has power over you, he’s loving. But the minute you do something to rock the boat… 😩 I have this really bad feeling that Gator is going to make an effort to be his own man, just in time to learn a final lesson about just what type of monster he narrowly avoided becoming. That scene with the blindfold and the rope keeps coming back to me.

Of course, my anxieties about that little clip aside there is always the possibility of the narrative going full Shakespeare on us. Gator, bringing about the downfall of his father’s kingdom by falling in love with his step mother and killing his father. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾 Full on Oedipus.

#fargo s5 #gator tillman #speculation #character meta

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kinnsporsche · 2 years

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✨ a comprehensive guide on why daemi is literally the worst ✨

if y’all missed whats currently happening with daemi on twitter here we go.

context: daemi are the writers of the kp novels made up of two people. poi (a cishet female) and yok (a cis gay man)

1. barcode

poi admitted to essentially grooming barcode whilst they filmed the series. she claimed she “taught barcode how to be a good actor” by teaching him how to give her and yok massages. barcode was 16 at the time of kp filming. jeff calls them out for abusing and misusing their privileges as authors. jeff also emphasises that they’re not joking, he’s the second actor with mile to confrm that the harassment from the actors isn’t something they joke around with. (source x)

a couple people started digging through their old interactions with barcode and found him looking super uncomfortable around them to the point that jeff comes and intervenes, even perth looks uncomfortable with their interaction in the background. barcode also, whether jokingly or not, says that he’s scared of yok. (sources x and x)

2. apo

a video from what i assume is a live came out recently where yok and poi basically get apo to do some fanservice which he does pretty playfully in his usual apo style. poi seemed to think it wasn’t enough and got up and started trying to unbutton his shirt to make him take it off whilst he’s literally trying to fight her off and saying “don't do this to me, enough poi, please bring back the old poi.” she then slaps him on the arm and apo playfully starts pretending to hit her back for it but you can clearly see how uncomfortable and distressed he is when he leaves the room (sources x and x)

a few months back daemi decided to republish the novel with a picture of the cast as the book cover. they only booked bible, build, and mile, because they said apo was busy on a retreat and didn’t bother rescheduling the shoot despite the fact that he’s one of the, if not the, mains. fans started a campaign on twitter in support of apo and apo liked some of the tweets and yok started arguing with him on twitter. the conversations and screenshots are all buried and deleted so i dont have many sources for this but (source: x)

someone associated with the two of them (wannggjinn852 on twitter) accused apo of sexually harassing mile because he was teasing and joke-flirting with him the way he does in a live. a few days later daemi did a twitter space and invited the person who accused him into their audio call with them (sources x and x)

basically daemi really dislike apo and bully him a lot because of it. my guess is that they’re jealous of the friendship he has with mile because they both have a creepy obsession and infatuation with him which brings me onto

3. mile

he has openly come out and said that they sexually harass him, and he’s made it clear that it’s not a joke, that when he talks about what they do to him he’s not messing around, and they just laugh it off because they think they can get away with it all. (source x)

he’s also genuinley uncomfortable around them and they just don’t care and keep touching him and harassing him. when mile sees yok recording his exist post episode 7 underwater kiss he literally tries to hide himself and looks so uncomfortable. (source x and x)

yok is, by his own words, a digital content creator for be on cloud. today a pretty sensitive and jarring picture was posted on be on cloud’s instagram story that doesn’t fit with the rest of the content that they’ve posted over the last few days. it’s from an awkward and weird angle, has nothing to do with the tour, so there’s been speculation that yok was the one who took and posted it because of his obsession with mile. tw, the source includes the picture. (source: x)

4. bible

more harassment towards bible from yok. he asks bible to call him ‘mom’ or ‘mommy’ or something and bible refuses and says he already has a mom and keeps touching him and holding him when he tries to get up and leave. (source x and x)

5. pond

a video has surfaced that poi seems to have taken of her at a gathering with some other people. she pans the camera to pond (the screenwriter and director of kinnporsche the series) who smiles at it and then she leans in and kisses him without his consent. the discomfort is pretty clear in his eyes (source: x)

6. misc

made, and fully intended to sell, merch of vegas’ don’t worry i’m not gonna hurt you line before he assaults porsche in the show and only got rid of it when they faced backlash for proffiting off of sa (source x)

be on cloud had to tell them to stop hosting events around content for kinnporsche the series because they kept giving things away and people were getting mad at pond, mile, and apo, when it didn’t happen or when things were spoiled. (source x)

they’ve always been super disrespectful and rude to fans when they’re criticised and recently yok told international fans to fuck off in an instagram live (source: x and x)

tldr: everybody listen to bas

#daemi #kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series #man i hope boc can get them out but i know the chances are slim bcs the writers are protected by law #i just want our boys to be safe and happy esp bcs boc is such a safe environment for apo after everything he went through #god i hope they dont ruin it for him!!!!#anyway if more things happen ill try to update this #daemi masterpost

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lurkingshan · 10 months

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Step by Step Episode 11 (OF DOOM)

Warning: I really, really did not like this episode. If you’re trying to keep positive vibes you should scroll on by, friends!

Welp. I told a few friends last week that my biggest disappointment would be if, after missing the mark on the emotional payoff of the slow burn and speed running the relationship, the show chose to break them up and do a time jump rather than staying with them in the present time and working through the conflicts they set up. And here we are! I wish I’d been wrong about where this was heading. Shouts to @waitmyturtles and @neuroticbookworm for holding me down while this show fell apart on me, I’ve been all in a tizzy about it, because I really loved it for awhile there.

This episode, yet again, felt like a disjointed mess. After last week’s cliffhanger, the idea of Pat resigning to get away from the predatory office gossip fell away within a few quick scenes. Instead the tension disappeared as the plot brought them into a bubble with only their most supportive colleagues and we swerved into a retread of the Put nonsense and a new plot about Jeng and Pat fighting to save the digital marketing team via the power of Put’s quasi-celebrity and Instagram likes. Or something. I honestly couldn’t tell you the details of what they were trying to accomplish, I was too distracted by my incredulity to pay close attention to this very sudden fake problem that they were obviously going to conquer (that, my friends, is what we call conflict with no stakes). Meanwhile, the show suddenly wants me to care about Jaab and Jen again - enough to devote a big portion of the penultimate episode’s runtime to them, what a choice - after doing fuck all with that plot for six weeks. It’s a no from me.

It doesn’t matter anyway, because soon enough we’re time skipping again! After resolving the work challenge subplot we speed past another three months of Pat and Jeng’s relationship without addressing any of their issues, and I guess I’m supposed to be at peace with being a full nine months into their relationship with no onscreen emotional advancement? But I gotta be honest, y’all. I am not. You just don’t do this with a slow burn romance narrative. You can’t spend 80% of your runtime building to something that you have no intention of paying off, and no amount of thinking about what else this show is trying to say is going to convince me they did proper justice to the relationship. I already broke down why I didn’t think the episode 10 culmination got us there, and nothing that happened in this episode changed my opinion.

And all of this is leading to yet another time jump - two entire years this time - after the big reveal that Jeng doesn’t believe in Pat at all and literally bought his success, Evil Daddy knew it all along and waited for a choice moment to deploy the info for maximum damage while twirling his villain mustache, and Pat is finally quitting for real and dumping Jeng for good measure.

And ya know what? GOOD FOR PAT. I was completely on his side in this decision. If there’s one bright spot in this episode (other than Chot, always Chot) it’s Pat getting himself together enough to realize he deserves better than the bullshit he’s been getting from Put and Jeng and walking on out. So Jeng and Pat are now broken up, but I never got invested in their relationship in the first place, because we barely saw it, let alone got the chance to live in and feel it. I wasn’t even upset while watching this breakup scene - it left me emotionally indifferent. Which is maybe the worst thing I can say about a dramatic climax in a story.

I guess next week we’ll meet Jeng and Pat again two years in the future and get some kind of happy ending. I’m gonna stick around for the finale and cross my fingers that we get all the epilogue fluff we have definitely earned, but sadly, this show has lost me.

#step by step #thai bl #shan shouts into the void

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waitmyturtles · 11 months

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SPOILERS FOR THE ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC FIRST EPISODE OF OS2 X BBS

(I’m on the far, far end of the international date line, so hopefully most of y’all have seen it or are close to seeing it...)

I MEAN?!?!?!?! I MEEEEANNNNNN?!?!??!?!?!!?

Maybe I was a little (okay, A LOT) worried that these episodes would feel like an appendage, maybe in kind of the way I felt The Eclipse episodes turned out (but I really need to rewatch those again).

But how could I not trust Aof? It almost seems like he started writing this as soon as he was done with BOTH BBS and ATOTS to put this story together.

I was getting mixed up in mom brain with @miscellar a few days ago, thinking that there was going to be a body swap thingy, and kind of groaning about it, so I’m SO SO GLAD I WAS WRONG, and that this is going to be set up to be a mini-drama about two couples going through their growth shit.

I dunno, y’all. What can I say. The MAJORITY of you all have been waiting MUCH LONGER than me to see Pran and Pat reunited, as I only watched Bad Buddy in January, and ATOTS late last year, but still, really -- I have this seriously strong sense of nostalgia that I am so happy to see Pat and Pran HAPPY, and/or at least working on their relationship, AND, JESUS, to see Phupha and TIAN TOGETHER, and omg, THAT MUSIC THAT PLAYED WHEN PHUPHA TURNED HIS HEAD and Pran was googly-eyed, and I was literally DYING AT THIS STARBUCKS, actually covering my mouth with giggles because not only is it so good to see all these guys back, but ALL OF THEM TOGETHER, and acting together, and FUCK, THIS WHOLE TWO-WEEK DEAL IS GOING TO BE SO FUCKING GOOD.

Like, this storyline does NOT seem played out. (Listen, I enjoyed PatWai.)

Honestly, I can’t really conjure analysis, LOL. I’m just too overwhelmed. The fucking shots of Chiang Mai and Pha Pun Dao. Pran sticking his hand out of the car and seeing the green hills. PRAN IS THERE, Y’ALL, PRAN. I mean --

IT’S DOUBLE NOSTALGIA TIME. THAT’S WHAT AOF DID, THAT’S WHAT HE’S DOING TO US!!!!!!

GAAAAAHHHHH. I think that’s it. I’m getting hit TWICE, Y’ALL, TWICE WITH THE FEELS! PatPran, PhuphaTian! Flashbacks to Tinidee and Chiang Mai! Campus and hills of tea! It’s too much! Too much for an almost menopausal woman like myself! I’m fuckin’ gonna give myself hot flashes with this shit!

And Tian is SO FEISTY, UGH, and Pat is SO DETERMINED but still making silly mistakes, but being SO HONEST and reflective about those mistakes, and Pran is still such a buggy little SHIT, but has opened up so much, as we can see, to be open and honest about his feelings, while these guys still know and maybe slightly regret that they have to keep things secret.

I FUCKING LOVE THAT THIS EPISODE MADE MULTIPLE REFERENCES TO UNCLE TONG AND THE IMPACT THAT HE HAD ON THEM. THAT THEIR HONEYMOON TRIP WAS THE LAST TIME THEY COULD BE OPEN AND OUT TOGETHER.

I might have more to say later, but I’m just agog right now. This was so well done, at least so far. These guys fucking hauled ass to do this show, I mean, Ohm had finished filming Double Savage like the day before this. I’m shaking my damn head. This was fun, it was flirty, it was emotional, the bros are still fucking bro-ing (WTF KORN, BTW! I mean, did you out them, or was that a slightly homophobic comment?!), it’s filmed BEAUTIFULLY, but what would you expect of Aof otherwise.

I mean. I just wrote a whole bunch of gibberish, but I honestly have no words. I’m so, so, so, so, so, so, so glad to have all of these guys back, in one place, all four of them, acting together, working together (PAT IN THE CLASSROOM OMFG I’M GONNA DIIEEEEEEE TOMORROWWWWW).

I’m a CROSSOVER STAN, NO PROBLEMS WITH IT. I AM SUITED AND SEATED FOR IT. Ohm x Nanon x Earth x Mix -- FUCK. YESSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!

#bad buddy #bad buddy the series #a tale of thousand stars #atots #our skyy 2 x bad buddy #our skyy 2 x a tale of thousand stars #our skyy 2 x atots #our skyy 2 x bad buddy x a tale of thousand stars #our skyy 2 x bbs x atots #patpran #pranpat #pat x pran #pran x pat #tian x phupha #phupha x tian #ohm pawat #nanon korapat #earth pirapat #mix sahaphap

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gh0stsp1d3r · 1 year

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Tangerines and deers part 10

Tag list: @slut-f0r-u

This is not the last chapter just wait but it is a long ass chapter so grab your popcorn or whateva

The white death stepped onto the train, to see his daughter.

“Daughter.” He said in Russian.

“Father.” She said back.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

Ladybug stepped out with the briefcase. It beeped.

“Hey, uh, fellas, I’m looking for a Mr. Death. Got his case here.” He said to a few assassins. They snapped their heads to the strange man, carrying the case, and wearing a little bracelet with a deer and a ladybug charm. he got one for himself as well, to match with you.

“Hey, easy.” He said, as they roughly took the case. They hit him in the stomach, he groaned and fell to his knees.

They drew sharp blades and he sighed.

“Hurt people hurt people.”

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

You watched the scene go down, while moving from car to car, as he slowly got farther and farther.

“He’ll be fine, love.” Tangerine grabbed your hand, and started to run.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“I came to see you.” The prince said.

“Hm.”

“And to make you finally see me. The real me.”

“Hm.”

“I built myself up from the nothing you gave me. All do I could be the one in front of you today…” she looked down at her gun, and brought it to his face.

“My finger on the trigger. I was the one… who deserved your attention. Your love. I’m more like you than that little fuckup ever was.”

He took her gun, she breathed heavily. He laughed and pointed it at her as she cried.

“Do it. I came here to kill you. So kill me. Kill me like you did all the others who tried the same. Do it. Fucking do it!”

He moved the gun up, and imitated a gun shot to tease her. “Pow.” He laughed and went closer to her.

“I see you, dochka. I always have.” He grabbed her jaw. “But you have never been part of my plan.” He pushed her aside, his men following after him.

“We found the American!” One said, and the white death looked at him on his knees.

“What about the others?”

“They’re all dead. Uh, good news is I have your case.”

“Ay, good news, good news.”

“Clear the train.”

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“All right, Thomas. Time for you to start up-“ Lemon said, and paused.

“Oh shit, everything’s in Japanese. There is no episode in Japanese. What the f-“

You and Tangerine went against the man’s orders, and went to help Kimura anyways.

“Thought you could use the help.” You shrugged when he asked what you were doing there. You grabbed the katana out of your back holster.

“Hell yeah.” You muttered, waiting around the corner with it as tangerine stood far away from you.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“Get on the ground!” One of his men told the man, he kneeled onto the floor.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“Man, I got a bad feeling about this. We have no idea what’s in this case.”

“What are you talkin’ about?” The other assassin said.

“Why is it always gotta be us that opens this shit?”

“Just open the case. I’d like to keep my fuckin’ arms.”

“Uhh, Mr. Death, if I may? The shadow buyer, who bought all our contracts, got us all on this train, Me, the hornet, Tangerine, Lemon.. Deer. That was you, right?” Ladybug asked.

“Yes, very astute. I brought you on this train hoping you’d kill each other.”

“Okay. Well, um… if I could… why?”

“Why you do what you do?”

“You know I’ve been asking that very question. I kept going because of deer, but… now I have no reason too, honestly.” He said, trying to sell it that she was dead. If he found out , and he killed her himself, he would’ve never forgave himself

“If it’s so safe, why didn’t he just open it? What if it’s a bomb and it blows up in our faces? You think these stupid masks are gonna protect us?”The assassin said.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“All these years later… the burden of your betrayal still heavy upon your heads. Let me relieve you of both.” The elder said, the assassins looked confused.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

“My wife… was taken from me.”

“I heard. I’m so sorry for your loss. It was a horrible accident.”

The white death laughed “Horrible.”

“Oh, no, no. No. Nothing in life is an accident. It was an assassination attempt on me. Fate put two wet work operatives, twins, on a job in Bolivia, butchering my entire crew. And I had to go deal with it.”

Ladybug snapped his head to him, and looked as he put the puzzles together.

“Oh shit. Deers boyfriend and his brother killed his crew! This makes everything worse.” He thought.

“Fate put a girl, only 16 years old, and had her eliminate 2 of my entire buildings with only her hands and a sword.”

“Deer?” He asked him, a little shocked. He didn’t even know you did other jobs before you worked with him, Maria had said she was new.

“Yes, fate was when I left the hospital as soon as I heard, and left her alone. And then I got a call, saying she had died.”

“Oh. That- that sucks, honestly.”

“That is why it was my wife in the car that night, not me. Fate put my wife in the hospital. A piece of her rib, piercing her heart. Only the most skilled cardiovascular surgeon could save her life. But two nights earlier, this surgeon was poisoned. Fate. Fate again.”

“And then the hornet killed the surgeon! Holy shit.” He thought.

“Don’t wanna sound judgmental, but if you hired the hornet, you had your own kid killed?”

“Oh, yes.”

“Okay.”

“Oh, yes I did. The piece of shit. That night… I told her not to leave. To wait for me. But she promised it was the last time we would ever bail him out of trouble. Well, I suppose she was right. If I had amputated that weakness out of my life years ago, she would still be by my side!”

“Yeah, it helps to process this. I have- I have a good therapist.”

“I loved my wife very much. She taught me a valuable lesson. If you do not control your fate… it will control you.”

“Hm. Hm?” He was a little confused at the saying.

“So I took control. I brought them all here to die. But now there is only one left. Mr. Carver.”

“Whoa. Uh… excuse me?” He said, fucking carver. He thought.

“The man who murdered my wife.”

“Bro-“

“Just open it.” The assassin said.

“Fine!” The other assassins opened the case, and it exploded as Ladybug yelled “Im not carver!”

The assaisains flew back, and they were now on the train.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

The older man threw his hat, and he grabbed the assassins weapon, and sliced his neck with it.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

You held your stance, and held the katana tight, but not too tight. You held it only slightly above your head, and waited for the assassin to come there.

You sliced his neck, he immediately went into the floor and you laughed.

“Can’t believe I remembered that.” You smirked, and Tangerine just looked at you in admiration.

And then Kimura hit the other ones with a heavy bottle, which also worked. Then he grabbed another katana from the other assassin. You let him do the work, putting yours away and looked back to tangerine.

(Bitch we twinninnn 🤭😜)

“I think he’s got it. We should probably go help Lemon now.” You said.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

Ladybug was upside down, he groaned. At least the plan worked. He thought.

❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎❤︎︎

You both ran over to Lemon.

“Oh shit, something’s happening.” He said and the train started to move. He ran through some signs, and the remaining assassins ran onto the train quickly.

Tangerine grabbed his shoulder and looked over it.

“How the hell do you know how to drive a train?” You asked him.

“I don’t!”

“Wha- never mind. You don’t know how to slow this damn thing down?!” You said, and was going to help him when you noticed something.

Ladybug opened the door, and you turned your head to him.

“You’re safe.” You said, relieved.

“I promised, right? And when have I ever broken a promise?”

“A lot of times.” You laughed, and hugged him. He laughed too.

You guys stopped and turned back to Lemon.

“Hey, so far so good. You can stop the train.”

“About that, I took the velocity of the train and divided it by the mass, and I realize that I don’t know how to fuckin’ drive a bullet train!”

“All you talk about is trains! How the hell do you not know?” Tangerine groaned in annoyance.

“Man, Thomas is a metaphor for lie, not how to actually drive- Get down!” He said, as some assassins started to shoot.

Tangerine grabbed you by your waist and you both ducked on the floor, right in front of a seat and in front of ladybug.

The assassin had to reload, and you, Ladybug, and Tangerine were going to get up, before Lemon yelled “I got this! Stop the train!”

“What?!”

Lemon kicked one, and they all fell down like bowling pins.

“Uh- Deer, you know how to read Japanese, right?!” Ladybug looked at you.

“Yeah! But I don’t understand what any of this fucking means! I don’t know shit about trains-“

“I got them, take care of this.” Tangerine said, as another assassin came up behind you guys.

“English, English, English, English, Brakes!” Ladybug scanned through the book. “We’re good! I got it!”

Then, the manual dropped and all the pages went flying. While he was distracted, he noticed another train. They were on the wrong track.

“Hang on!”

“We’re on the wrong track!” You grabbed onto the seat next to you, and you were next to ladybug.

Once that was over, there was fire next to you.

“I’m sorry I shot you!” Lemon apologized to Ladybug.

“Actually, it was like, twice!”

“Apologize later, fucking Do something!” Tangerine said, and knocked out the last assassin.

“Sorry?”

“You show me twice!” But one of the assassins on top of the train made his way down, landing directly on top of you. You groaned as he sat on top of you.

Tangerine kicked him off, and hit him with the fire extinguisher repeatedly.

“I’m sorry for shooting you twice!”

“Thanks man! That shows real growth!” You groaned and held your head, and just laid there in the chaos.

The fire extinguisher was out, and tangerine grabbed your hand and helped you up.

“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck.” Ladybug smashed the buttons with it, and then threw it back, which hit another assassin. He pushed the red button and the door opened, he flew out.

“My head hurts.” You muttered, sitting down.

There was only one assassin left, behind Lemon. Ladybug threw the knife at him.

“Hey, and I’m sorry for almost killing you.” He looked at tangerine, as he sat next to you and held your hand.

Tangerine just gave him a scowl.

Another assassin got up, and lemon dove out of the train.

Tangerine got up, and yelled for him.

“What the fuck!” You said.

You got up, and stood next to Ladybug now.

You saw the emergency brakes, and quickly got down. You worked with the wires, while ladybug watched.

Tangerine watched as well, And it was annoying. You groaned in frustration. “Fuck it.” You muttered, and ripped all the wires out.

The train started to slow down, and ladybug gave you a high five.

But then, tangerine grabbed you as soon as he saw the wall. You guys ran through the wall, and ladybug fell onto you both, all three of you went through the whole train.

Then, it stopped completely in a village. Ladybug and tangerine groaned, and got up.

Tangerine looked around, panicked.

He saw you, eyes closed and on the ground.

“Oh fuck. Fuck, fuck.” He said, and ladybug went next to him.

“She’s breathing. She’s fine, She probably just passed out. Her heads fragile.” He said, with a quiet laugh as he remembered the multiple times you’ve passed out.

Then, he looked back to see the white death.

“Oh, fuck.” He said as he pointed the gun at ladybug.

“About your wife, I had nothing to do with that. It’s a mistake. I’m not carver. I- We only do snatch and grab jobs.” He gestured to himself and you, who laid on the ground.

“The carver! I want the carver! I hired the carver!”

“No, he had a stomach thing, man. We’re just filling in.”

Then, you got up, breathing heavily.

“How’d I survive that?” You muttered and looked down at your broken hand.

Tangerine sighed in relief, kissing your forehead.

“For what it’s worth, carver is a dick.”

“Biggest dick I’ve seen in my life.” You said, and groaned again, hitting your head against the remains of the train.

“The most cunning assassin.. Maybe the laziest.”

The white death pointed the gun to you. It clicked. Tangerine immediately stood in front of you.

“Don’t think your gun works, man.” You laughed as the gun only clicked. Ladybug snickered.

He pulled out another. “Oh come on! Just let it go, I was 16.” You giggled and stared at him.

That gun didn’t work either. Because once he shot it again, it shot him in the face instead.

“Oh.”

You laughed hysterically, tangerine looked back at you, confused.

“Oh…”

“That’s so gross, it’s funny.” You laughed again.

“Man, did you really fall that hard?” Ladybug muttered and got up.

“Tan, you look funny.” You muttered and put your finger on his nose. He scrunched his nose again.

“Tan?” He asked, eyebrows scrunched.

“It’s a nickname, duhhh.”

“Why do I need a nickname for a nickname?”

“You don’t. It’s just cute.” You shrugged your shoulder, he sighed as you stood up next to him.

“Just like you.”

“I’m not cute. Never call me that again.” He said.

“Yes you are.” You said in a baby voice.

“Hey, about this plum, shouldn’t the plum give up all resentment? Like-“ Ladybug asked as they all walked. A machine gun fired, and you all looked over to where it came from.

All five of you stopped.

“Oh my god.”

“This bitch again?” You sighed.

“It’s my luck that delivered my fathers corpse at my feet.”

“The narcissism on this chick. Untreatable.”

“She doesn’t look too good.” You said, staring at her bloodied clothes and face.

“Now I am-“ she held the gun up.

“Okay, wait, wait, wait. What is with this fucked up family? You need some suggested reading, if I may. Surviving borderline personality disorder.”

“What?” She asked.

“It’s true.” You shrugged.

“I highly recommend it.”

“Now I am the white d-“ A truck ran her over. A truck full of tangerines, to be exact.

“What was that? Was that karma?”

“It was Lemon.” Tangerine said, and walked over to the driver.

“Farewell, tentomushi.” The older man said.

You looked back to Ladybug, who looked confused.

You just shrugged.

A car pulled up, and you looked over.

“Heyyy!” You said, waving to Maria.

“Maria?”

“Did you come to rescue us?”

“Did you need rescuing?”

“You came to rescue us.”

“Please don’t make me regret it.”

Lemon and tangerine came over to you guys.

“Who’s this?” Tangerine asked.

“Our handler.” You shrugged.

“Oh.” He muttered.

“The.. twins I’m guessing?” She looked to them.

“Yup. Did you know we made out?” You pointed to you and tangerine.

“I can tell..” she muttered, looking at the hickeys on both your necks. You giggled and tangerines face heated up.

“Tangerine, I forgot to ask… where do you live? Like… just-“ you turned to him.

“London.”

“Oh.” You said. A long distance relationship might be hard.

“But… me and Lemon were planning on moving soon anyways.”

#tangerine x reader #bullet train #aaron taylor johnson #bullet train x reader #tangerine #tangerine bullet train #aaron taylor johnson x reader #platonic ladybug x reader #tangerine x you

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dream-phantasm · 1 year

Text

Leona Kingscholar x Reader: Love Letters (END)

Y’all, let’s pretend it’s still Feb 14

this thing has literally been chilling in my drafts since the first part of this series 😭 so, uh, if anything seems off, it’s because I wrote this before I wrote parts 2-6

Hope you enjoy! This entry contains a very small reference to Episode/Book 1

You enter the library. Your mind was still racing from the possibilities of your…admirer? Ugh, it was still weird to think about! Who could it be!?

You weren't even here for the books but it would be nice to maybe get some studying done. There was a big exam coming up soon or so you had heard from Riddle. You sigh and get to work, gathering books.

Plus, Ace and Deuce wouldn't come find you here anyway. You had dropped Grim-sitting duty on them, which in retrospect, wasn't a good idea. If anything did happen, you had no part in that. You'll bail them out of the consequences later.

You'd been here a few times before. After all, you were a complete stranger to this world and the library seemed like the best place to find out more. Since you weren't from this world, you could treat this just like reading the lore of a fictional world. That made things fun for you.

You made your way to your spot at the back of the library. Nobody usually goes back there so you've laid claim to it as your private reading spot. The books you've compiled completely block your view so you carefully put them down, watching your step. You pull a chair out and you freeze.

The soft sound of breathing and a light inconsistent thumping. You look beyond your pile of books.There lies a slumbering man, head laying on his arms as he's slumped over the table.

He has messy brown locks, there are two braids framing his face. His unbuttoned shirt and rolled up sleeves gave off the impression he was rather careless with his appearance. You really hated how he appeared to give off that 'I woke up like this' look but still managed to look gorgeous. Most notable of all, of course, were the fuzzy lion ears on top of his head and the furry tail with a tassel of fur at the end.

You stare silently. Internally, your thoughts are going off like a lightning round.

Who is this guy? Is this a beastman? Should I be scared? Is this a good time to run? Will he wake up? What will I do if he wakes up? Can I even outrun a beastman? If he's not a cat, what is he-

He shifts. His head leans slightly to the side, off his arms. He does this rather gracefully and now you can see his beautiful features that just scream 'big trouble'. Oh boy, that scar is not helping your heart. You're starting to understand your admirer. It does indeed feel like an oncoming heart attack.

You notice him shivering just a little. Maybe beastmen were simply more sensitive to the cold draft. It is basically Winter after all and you've definitely had it hard living in Ramshackle. You sigh and shrug off your blazer.

Hoping you don't wake him up, you gently lay it over him. You tense as the tassel at the end of his tail thumps against the chair. His ears twitch and your heart clenches.

It's adorable, the animal traits. Especially on a handsome guy like that? Well, the gap here was gigantic. Paired with the scar, it gave him a roguish-edge that would make anyone swoon.

Wait a second. A scar? You stop and gasp rather loudly. You quickly slap a hand over your own mouth. His ears twitch and you pray to the great sevens he hasn't woken up.

It's the grouchy guy from the botanical garden! The last time you had seen him he was threatening to bite your face off or something and you hadn't paid attention to his face. Aha! So you were right, all the attractive people here were the worst.

His name was Leona, or so you had assumed. That's what Ruggie had called him that day. Ah, stupid! You knock yourself on the head. If only you had recognized him sooner!

You had met him other times before in the botanical garden again. Your conversations were always awkward with him making sly remarks and implications about mauling you.

Once he was in a better mood though, he made an okay conversational partner. Leona was rather intelligent and sometimes he threw some advice at you when you were doing your homework. Of course, that was because of his weird superiority complex over you.

You never really paid attention to his face though, the first time he had looked at you was intimidating enough. You never asked for his name either. Your mind must've repressed the details of his face in your head.

You hadn't gotten the chance to speak to him again since everything just…happened with Heartslabyul. He had completely slipped your mind as you were reeling from the incident. You felt kind of bad.

You glumly wondered if you could get your blazer back. But then again, you didn't want him to freeze to death. But then again, if you took it from Leona now, you could leave your future nuisance cold. Wait, that was kind of mean. He was kind of friendly and helpful sometimes.

You wish the guys here weren't so complicated but you had to admit, that was their charm. Yes, they were all jerks. You're starting to think Stockholm syndrome is sinking in.

With a sigh, you take a seat and open a book. You sneak a glance at the beastman to find he's still sleeping like a rock. Leona's no longer shivering. I just let him have the jacket because I don't want to risk waking him. You reason to yourself.

You bring your focus back to the book you're currently reading as you try to ignore Leona. Dang it, even when he's not doing anything, he manages to captivate your attention. You huff but keep your eyes on the book.

What feels like about a few minutes later, you lower the book with a sigh. "Oh my great-" You try not to scream.

His lidded emerald eyes bore into you, pinning you still. A tiny amused smile plays at his lips as his . You nearly threw your book at him out of sheer shock.

"You- How long were you awake?" You calm yourself down with deep breaths as you still look at him wide-eyed. "Hm, long enough." Leona makes a low hum, there's still a calm smile on his face.

"That's very specific." You respond. Silence fills the air as you try to hold a staring contest with him. You don't really feel like returning to your book. His green eyes just keep drawing you in. You wonder how deep they go. You might've been imagining it but they were really bright.

"Hm, like what you see?"

Your face turns red as you groan. You drop your head into the table. "No, stop. This is the worst Valentines day." You grumble.

"Tell me about it." You hear him reply, you hate how every time he speaks, your heart skips a beat. You're starting to understand your admirer. "Don't patronize me. You're attractive and cool, you got a bunch of confessions or something." You snap. You're just stating the obvious when you call him that.

"What? There's nothing to be jealous about. Valentines is a day just like any other, where some win and others lose." Leona drawls. "Ugh, yeah. At least there was free food." You mumble, then you remember Ruggie. "Wait no, my food got stolen by that jerk." You scowl.

You're still face down on the table. You notice his tail underneath the table. You watch as it inches closer to you.

"Did you like the candy hearts?"

You freeze. You didn't…nobody but Ace, Deuce and Grim should've known the contents of that pouch. Of course, the only exception would be the-

You shoot up from, just as you feel the tassel of his tail wrap itself around your ankle and pull. You fall forward onto the table, inches away from hitting the wood.

"Wow, what the heck was th-" You shout before you look up. You can feel his breath tickle your face but more importantly, those green eyes. The orange vest meant he was a Savanaclaw student if the animal features weren't already a dead giveaway.

"You…You're Leona Kingscholar, the dorm head of Savanaclaw." You pause.

"That's right. I would've thought you'd figure this out sooner." He snorts softly. Leona looks at you expectantly to continue.

"And…"

"And?"

"You're my secret admirer."

You're this close to banging your hand against the table if it turns out you're completely wrong.

"So, you finally caught me."

You breathe out a giant sigh of relief, leaning back into your seat. "Oh thank the great sevens!" You laugh, wiping tears of joy and relief from the corner of your eyes. You lay back and laugh some more.

"You're…that overjoyed that your secret admirer was me?" Leona looks incredulously at you. You stop to breathe, you realize how weird this probably looks to him. "Uh, um…" You consider his question carefully.

You blink at him blankly as you think. He sighs after a moment. "Ahh, I get it. So, it's a rejection." He grumbles. "No, no, i-it's not like that!" You frantically shook your head.

"I…I accept. You're cool. I want to get to know you better first though? Like, why were you so confident I wouldn't reciprocate?" You raise an eyebrow. To your surprise, a subtle blush somewhat forms on his face as his eyes widened only slightly.

"I don't know if you're really that dense to not notice. Most people don't like me, herbivore." He growls, tail flailing around lazily. "But, Bucchi seems to like you plenty and those Savanaclaw students cared enough to cover up for you." You frown.

"That's because I pay Ruggie and those students fear me too much to say anything." Leona snorts. "Hm…I don't think that's true at all." You sigh,

"You're very intelligent, cool and most of all- You're pretty pretty." You pull a cringe face that immediately gives you secondhand embarrassment…from yourself. Leona seems to think it's dumb because he shoves his hand in your face and pushes you back.

"Ah, okay. I get it." You groan, grabbing his hand off your face. Leona smirks, his fingers intertwining with yours.

Your face turns red, being around this man would do you no good.

Ao3: HERE If you see it posted anywhere or by anyone else, it's not me.

#twisted wonderland #leona kingscholar x reader #leona x reader #leona kingscholar x mc #leona kingscholar #gender-neutral reader #gender neutral reader #reader insert #x reader #love letters #valentines day #fluff #valentines #happy valentine's day

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