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#which. Yeah the last like 3 or 4 times have been insanely bad

urf1lterr · 1 year

Text

lovesick | pedro pascal [4]

"and on this night and in this light i think im falling, im falling for you."

previous chapter: [3] series masterlist

summary: in which a 1975-obsessed film student accidentally falls in love with an older man she can't have.

pairing: actor!pedro x intern!reader

genre: acting world!au, big age-gap!, strangers to friends- maybe lovers?? au | angst, mature, awkward, love- eventually

word count: 10.6k

status: in progress

author's note: so sorry for the long wait! but i tried making this chapter longggg. i typically have my days off altogether and the rest of the week booked with work/school. i try to post many chapters within my short timeframe (bc im booked af) so pls expect another update soon after this one! sadly, it takes me around 8-10 hours to write one bc its hard to think lol. also, i don't want this to be too long of a series and kinda wanna connect the dots- slowly but surely, ya know? not edited.

"So, he just came knocking on your door at 6am?" Joon questioned, taking a sip of his smoothie soon afterwards. "I can't even wake up that early."

"We had to do that everyday for our last job."

"I woke up ten minutes before I had to be out the door," he shrugged. "Men get ready fast."

"Anyway," you eyed him as he cluelessly did the same, confused as to why you wouldn't look away. "I don't remember him coming."

"Yeah, because you fucking freaked out and hallucinated over Lady Gaga," Jules exclaimed, you automatically cringing just at the horrible memories you've recently faced with that damn cat.

Once she explained what had happened hours after you had woken up, you were disturbingly shocked.

And the fact that your sleepiness was to blame had you going insane- imagine all the other odd things you may had committed while under the covers.

But you will admit you did remember some of that night's events clearly, again like you practically making out with Lady Gaga- although she was the one who licked your face endlessly first.

Mortified just by the thoughts, you will never be able to face Pedro again sanely.

How could you when you recently dreamed about a man 25 years older being intimate with you- that's...confusing. And the worst part of it all was you couldn't say anything to anyone with the fear of being judged or laughed at- maybe both.

The thing was you couldn't quite understand why you had to dream about that. Maybe your time of the month was coming and your hormones targeted the first guy you had nonstop contact with?

No, that would've been Joon.

Attraction may had played a part but Joon definitely had that, Pedro as well but a little different...age-wise at least. There's no way you felt allured for men with bad jokes and rough skin- no offense. Right?

He did text you that same morning he dropped by and commented on how creepy you are half asleep and whether or not you agreed to his 'business' proposal. Not trying to start a conversation you knew you couldn't finish, out of second-hand shame, you just replied a simple:

LOL but busy with school atm to make a final decision- tell ya later

That later still hasn't arrived.

Unfortunately, you forgot to ask him why he made a random visit that morning- but you weren't going to ask him days later. In your mind, you need to avoid him. There's no way you'd be able to act normal after have unholy fascinations about him.

Not that it'll be a problem, you two hadn't seen each other for weeks before your cafe encounter, you're sure you can do it again without him noticing your distance.

It's been about two days since then which meant you didn't have to prioritize so much of your time on homework, you'll just save that for Sunday when it's all due.

"Did you bother to ask him why?" Jules added, turning to you. "He obviously wasn't coming to see me- I barely know the guy."

"You do know him!" you argue as she rolls her eyes. "You literally got mad at me for not recognizing him the first time we met."

"He's a celebrity- everybody knows him," she defends before tilting her head in curiosity. "But you two are oddly close, it's kind of weird."

"No," you shake your head, trying to laugh off her suspicions. "We are casual friends who fan girl over the same things."

People did take notice how close Pedro and you were but it wasn't anybody's fault you two had so much in common. Both of you loved Starbucks, going on hikes- when you weren't lazy, and believe Matt Healy is extremely attractive.

If they have a problem with that they can sue you.

"I see it," Joon adds, jumping up a bit. "Him and I barely talk and we're men- we should be bonding easily!"

"You're...you," Jules cringes, making Joon glare in return. "I can understand why he chooses not to be close to you."

Laughing, you watch as Joon quickly flips her the finger before he continues on with the conversation. "I just feel like he always comes around only to see you, it was pretty obvious since the first time he took us home."

Furrowing your eyebrows, you didn't understand what he meant by that. Pedro offered all three of you a ride home, not just you.

Already feeling done with this topic, you wanted to switch it before things started escalating and freaky theories started unfolding. They had every right to question your friendship, but you were starting to think they might be leading down a road where they may soon develop other impressions as to what your friendship might have been.

Why are you even thinking that? That's so inappropriate to imagine.

"You two are silly, he probably needed my advice on something or wanted to workout," you suggest, their faces showing they weren't fully convinced. "But anywho, did you call Yoongi yet?"

"I don't think that's a great idea," Joon declared, adjusting in your warm sofa. "He's not really a skating kind of guy."

Since it was Friday and you had no plans, you thought it would be a fun idea to be adventurous for once and do something you would never do on a regular basis.

Ice Skate.

Your friends were extremely down with the idea, but you needed a fourth person to make the group complete. Why not a skinny, impatient blonde man who would probably spend the whole night complaining about why this plan was awful?

Right now you could use some other grumpiness in your life.

"Just tell him to go," you beam back, clapping your hands in excitement as you'll soon be able to fall countless of times on the ice. "I'll buy him hot cocoa."

"You better do it or he'll never let that go," Joon states.

After hours of sitting around and blasting random music through your speakers, the three of you were ready to set off on your journey of locating the ice rink.

If it wasn't for Joon's constant whining to stop walking to take pictures of the scenery you probably would've arrived 15 minutes sooner than your actual arrival, but too bad your friend is a nature freak.

"You taking pictures of the pigeons better not be the reason why you're late," you heard Yoongi grumble as the three of you finally found him sitting on a bench near the entrance of the rink, staring directly at Joon who just scoffed.

"I'm sorry if my happiness bothers you," Joon snapped back as Yoongi just stood up from his seat and made his way to your trio.

Grabbing your ice skates wasn't too difficult as the long line seemed to flow by smoothly, but standing on them was a different story.

"I can't do this," you squeal as your hurriedly motion your arms around to find some balance. "I'm falling!"

Yoongi sent you a questionable look as he watched your poor attempts to stay still embarrassing. "We're not even on the ice yet."

Feeling a hand grab a hold on your shoulders and practically drag your feet towards the ice, you glance up to see Jules steadily directing you to face your fears.

Maybe this wasn't such a good idea.

"Are you going to push her in?!" you hear Joon gasp a few feet behind you but you couldn't turn your head as you rather focused your attention on yanking yourself off of Jules.

"It was her idea so she'll be the one going in first."

"Ahh!" you screech, putting all your pressure on your feet to stop her hard pull. Spiraling your ankles in the most crucial ways, you start to lightly slap her arms off you as she continues to fight them off.

One thing about her was she's going to make sure to remind you that this was your idea.

Feeling an arm gently tug you off her grip, you landed on Yoongi's side as Jules whined in return, offended that he ruined her vicious plan. Respectfully, he kept you stable with an arm wrapped behind your middle back as you gripped his other one, fearful she might snatch you away again.

"Why would you do that?!"

"I don't think watching her fall face first on the hard ice would be a fun sight to see," he bluntly returned as Jules huffed. "The sight of blood gives me the ick."

"I was waiting for that moment all afternoon," Jules sighed, disappointed that she wouldn't be seeing you fall- yet.

Waiting for her to walk away to go on the ice, you see Joon follow her before you released your friend, relieved that she wouldn't be partaking in her scandalous scheme just yet.

"You do know how to skate, right?" Yoongi asked, his uncertain eyes on yours as you crazily wave your arms in front of him to rub off his questionable thoughts.

"Do I? Of course I do!" you argue, making your way towards the ice until you were two feet away from it. Putting your feet on the edge, you hesitate as you could feel the cold breeze wrap around you legs. "I'm gonna go now."

"Yippy," he states, waiting at your poor attempts to convince him.

Giving him a thumbs up, you clap your hands together to try to reassure yourself that you could do this, forgetting that he was right behind you secretly laughing.

Taking one final breath, you placed your right foot on top of the ice steadily, trying your best not to make any harsh movements, until you felt a hard jerk on your upper body, making you lose yourself in an instant.

"God, if you don't know how to skate why would you suggest it?" Yoongi grumbled, gliding both your bodies along the ice as he held tightly onto your arms. You were practically skating like a wet dog in front of him, begging with your eyes for him not to abandon you.

"I always wanted to try."

Sending you an annoyed look, you zipped your mouth as his arms were now securing you, closing any gaps there may have been and giving you the ride of your life.

Shutting your eyes harshly, you didn't dare to witness the environment around as you felt the icy wind slap your face the faster you two- or at least by Yoongi's swaying, got.

There were times where he did pretend to lose his balance, causing you to cry in horror and him immediately placing his hand over your mouth by how loud you weaped.

But other than that, you came to enjoy his help as your two other friends rudely abandoned you guys in order to practice their poor attempts of leaping across the rink.

"Okay," Yoongi started, releasing his left hand from your side and keeping you close with only his other. "Now you try on your own."

Fear creeping up in your face, you rapidly shake your head in disagreement and try catching his recent abandoned arm, which he denied. "I can't."

"Can't or won't?" he countered back making you silent.

He did have a point.

"C'mon, it's not that hard. If Joon could do it, you can."

"He's literally on the ground right now," you whine as Yoongi quickly averts his eyes in search of your tall friend, soon finding Joon clutching his knee in pain as Jules records on her phone.

"No."

Sighing, he continues to look around, trying to plan out an idea that would at least convince you to slide a few feet alone without his help until he smirked and met your eyes.

"What would Matt Healy do?"

Widening your eyes, you were taken back by his question.

Only Pedro used that line on you.

And for some reason it felt odd when Yoongi did the same. You shouldn't be bothered by his choice of words...but you were a little.

He wasn't him to be saying it.

"He wouldn't force me to do something I didn't want to do," you reply back, causing him to groan.

"I feel like you just want to be in my arms," he retorted with a grin, immediately making you revolt and fly out of his arms, your bottom hitting the ice hard. "Well that's one way to make you skate."

Feeling immediate pain on the back of your thighs, you just knew you were going to be bruised and swollen the next day. But hey, this technically counts for your workout for the week.

Awkwardly swaying your body around, you couldn't get up off the damn ice. You were sure you looked like a fish out of water by how crazy you were moving.

"Get on your knees," Yoongi commented, causing you to send him a death glare as he lifted his hands up in defense. "It helps you stand."

Or he could just grab your arms and help you himself.

Cautiously following his suggestion, you slowly pull your right leg up and place it firmly on the ice before slowly trying to do so with your left one. As you began to feel satisfied with the weight being supported, you felt your body finally working and lifting up off the ground before he poked your shoulder- making you fall again.

"I'm going to murder you!" you threaten as you stare at him on your back, whole body restlessly laying on the ground in misery as he cackles loudly.

He may have advantage on the ice, but oh man- once you regain your balance off it you were going to end that slender man's life.

"Isn't this just a sight to see," you heard someone exclaim before hands grab your arms and soon lift you back on your feet.

Moving your eyes to the ones in front of you, you burst out in smiles. "Bella! Nico!"

"I take this as my queue to leave,'" you hear Yoongi mumbles but you swiftly grab his arm from his close proximity and halt his plans.

He was not going to desert you now.

"What are you girls doing here?"

Not seeing them for a few weeks didn't make things awkward, but different. It was like catching up with old friends, even though you barely met them less than three months ago.

"Had nothing to do tonight so why not ice skate?" Nico giggled.

Bella examined you up and down before pointing at your head. "My god, your hair grew so long. Has it really been that long?"

Rolling your eyes, you were about to answer her before Yoongi cut in. "No, it's her fake extenstions."

Gasping, you turn your body to him and smack his shoulder as he smacks you back. One thing about him, he's all about equality. You touch him, he touches you- simple.

You don't see the way Nico and Bella exchange smirks to one another before Nico slides in front of you and pulls out her phone. "We should take a selfie! You know, for memories."

Laughing, you agree. You took some pictures with them but never really out of the work environment.

Uncomfortably standing still, Yoongi hastily moves to the side a bit, not wanting to intrude this moment you were having with your friends. He was a pretty sociable person, but only if they had things in common and he fairly knew them.

Yoongi didn't know these two young girls and he sure as hell didn't want to be the one being kicked out of this picture- so why not kick himself out first?

"Where are you going, we need your long arm to get us all in the frame!" Bella exclaimed, motioning Yoongi to move back as he sent her a flustered glance.

"I can just take it with the three of you."

"Nonsense!" Nico argued back, shaking her head as you giggled. "We don't leave people out."

Biting his bottom lip a bit, he scratches the back of his neck swiftly before increasing the speed of his skates to the girl, accepting her phone. "I suppose."

Fixing your posture, you stand behind your friend as he carefully raises his right arm up in the air, positioning the phone that was able to capture all four of you in the frame.

Pulling out the gummiest smile, you bursted out a gigantic grin after seeing the rare radiant expression Yoongi was giving. He was never one to show much emotion so finding him giving in for a picture amused you.

Taking the phone out of his hands, Bella examined the screen before chuckling. "Wow, you've got one adorable smile."

You could've sworn you saw Yoongi blush as he lowered his head while shaking off her compliment, trying to act natural but he wasn't fooling anyone.

He was shy.

Gasping at the sight in front of her, Nico pointed at the concession cart near one of the exits of the ice. "They have hot cocoa! We must get some."

Faking a groan, Bella allowed her friend to drag her away but not before sending you a pout to follow, which you were happy to do. You were freezing to death without even realizing it until you stopped your attempts to skate for the picture.

"I was promised a free cup," Yoongi stated as he was gliding behind you, softly pushing your back as you proceeded to do nothing but allow him to direct you to where your desired hot cocoa was.

Scoffing a little, you shush him as you reached the exit ramp. Jumping off, the two of you slowly waddled to Bella and Nico who were next in line.

"Wait," you start, pausing your footsteps which resulted in him almost falling after slamming to your side. "Shouldn't we ask Joon and Jules if they want one?"

Peeking over your shoulder, Yoongi looks back down to you. "Nah, don't wanna ruin their fun."

Following his recent glance, you could see Joon and Jules in front of one another, both holding hands as they try to catch a faster pace while twirling in big circles.

You were sure they were eventually going to knock a small child over soon.

"Next," you hear the worker call out, sitting behind his register waiting for your arrival.

Quickly walking up, you place your order as nothing else but the hot drinks seemed to interest you. The total came out to be the cost as what four drinks at your local cafe would be, but you shouldn't be surprised since this place was pretty popular to the public.

Pulling out his wallet so fast, you didn't have to process what Yoongi was doing until you caught the view of his credit card as he handed it over to the man in front of you.

"No-" you try intercepting what had just happened by giving your card to the worker who just shrugged as he had already paid for the drinks on Yoongi's card. "Why would you do that?"

"You're too slow," Yoongi bluntly said as he grabbed the two drinks and moved to the side so the next person in line could place their order.

"But it hadn't even been three seconds since he said the total before you handed him the card," you protest.

He handed you your cup, hoping it'll shut you up as he took a small sip from his own. "And?"

Is he being serious? "'And,'" you question as he continued to be unaware as to what you were getting at. "Since the beginning I vowed to buy you hot cocoa."

Yoongi laughed at how stubborn you were becoming. "Vowed? What a great word choice for this scenario, fiance."

Rolling your eyes at his teasing, you hated the fact he was avoiding your question. You knew he did it because he wanted to be a gentleman, but the problem was he didn't want to admit he was one.

Again, he was being shy.

"I see you are kind," you smirk as he gave you a disgusted glance. "Don't worry, I won't tell people you have a heart."

Before he could leave a snarky comeback, Nico and Bella came back in giggles as Yoongi retreated back to his natural state of looking lifeless. "Oh my gosh- we went to get napkins and I kid you not I may have poured my drink on the back of this poor little girl."

Lightly gasping, you widen your eyes as Yoongi confusingly replies back. "May have? You don't know if you did or not?"

Bella makes an accountable face, scrunching her nose in the process. "Okay, I did. But she's the one who ran into me!"

"Well, she was really small and you kind of didn't search your surroundings before kneeing her," Nico exposed, causing Yoongi and you to give each other a concerned look.

"You kneed her?!"

"Only in her side," Bella excused herself, sending Nico a betrayed look. "It wasn't like it was her stomach."

"It practically was...," Nico mumbled but became silent when her co-star eyed her hard.

Coughing uncomfortably, Yoongi caught everyone's attention as he tried to avert the conversation into something that wasn't as horrific as striking a child with hot cocoa and a knee. "We should probably hit the ice again soon before Jules and Joon find out we got these drinks without them."

"Jules is here?!" Bella beamed, searching around for her through the large gatherings of people on the ice. "I missed that crazy lady, she was the only one who would get my coffee order right."

"She told me she would threaten to get the baristas fired if they kept getting it wrong," Nico recalled, chewing her mouth a little. "That's why I stopped letting her take my orders."

Sighing, you looked up in the ceiling in disapproval as you could feel Yoongi laughing his ass off beside you. That was very Jules of her to do.

After another two hours of trying to figure out how to skate, and basically latching onto Yoongi the whole time as Bella and Nico were doing laps around you guys, you finally made it home.

To say you were exhausted would be an understatement- you were drained.

No, seriously. You hadn't worked out this much since Jules and you almost missed the subway two months ago and had to run three blocks to catch it on time.

That day was dreadful, but you were sure if you went to bed you were going to wake up lifeless like a worm.

"I call the shower first!" you hear Jules scream, running to her room in order to grab her belongings but you were faster and instantly made your way to the bathroom, locking the door before she could break in. "You bitch! How dare you steal it with my back turned!"

Grinning evilly to yourself, you wanted to get your night routines over with so you could hit the pillows quickly. Even after taking off all your makeup, taking a very steamy shower, and doing your nightly skin care routine, you were sure you could easily knock out sitting on the toilet if you had the chance.

We all have done it once in our lives.

Opening the door, the steam flows out smoothly as you face your very displeased roommate on the other side, glaring at you. "All yours," you smile, stepping to the side but she roughly pushes you in response, causing you to yelp as you manage to catch your balance midway.

Mental note, burn her eggs next breakfast.

Stepping into your room, you change into an oversized hoodie and sweats before throwing yourself under your covers in excitement.

The moment you've been waiting for all day: sleep.

Closing your eyes, you feel all your senses slowly drifting away from your body as relaxation crept up from all around. It was truly intoxicating how in trance you were.

But of course with your luck, nothing goes as planned- ever.

Wildly jumping up from the loud blaring of your phone, you cover your face in agony as the vibrations and noise cause pain throughout your entire body.

Who the hell was calling you at 10 o'clock at night? This should be illegal.

After taking a minute to control yourself, the ringing stopped. Good, now you won't have to make time to engage in a conversation. Quickly falling back down onto your pillows, it wasn't even ten seconds later before you feel your phone going off like crazy again.

With you eyes shut, you move your hands around your bed until you feel the cool object underneath your pillow. Lazily pressing any button, without batting one eye open, you move the phone to your ear before releasing a groggy, "What?"

"What a lovely way to greet somebody, kiddo."

You instantly freeze, automatically thinking about the vivid dream you had about him, then Lady Gaga, and felt a blush creeping in.

Slowly pulling the phone away, you let out a loud but fast scream before moving it back. How the hell are you going to begin a conversation without thinking about his lips on yours. "What do you want?"

Pausing for a second, you can hear him move around through his end. "Did you just scream?"

It's not like you didn't just dream about him kissing all over your body two nights ago.

"Did you just wake me up to ask me the obvious answer?"

Act like you don't care. Like you are perfectly fine.

He chuckles lightly and you can tell by his tone he was close to passing out too. "Somebody's cranky, is it past your bedtime?" Pedro teased.

You were definitely not in the mood to handle his ridicules at this hour, especially by how nervous he was slowly making you. What did he want?

"Yes," you simply reply before hitting the red button, ending the call and laying your head back on your pillow. Good, just end it before you make a bigger fool out of yourself.

It hadn't even been another ten seconds before your phone was ringing once again. Pulling it up to your face, you let out a huff. What a shocker, it was him again.

"You better have an insanely good reason as to why you chose to wake me up in the middle of my dream," you immediately say as you press the 'accept' button.

Hearing him laugh, you just know he has a sarcastic comment coming any second. "Wake you up? Honey, you're still living your dream talking to me."

Honey.

No, not another nickname for him to call you in future dreams.

Shaking that thought away, you rejected the idea of him being in any more dreams- you forbid it.

Loss at words for a second, you almost let your next words trip over one another before calmly gaining your composure at the incidental choice of your pet name.

"So funny," you reply back, trying your best to sound sane. "Pretty sure I was dreaming of a very shirtless Matt Healy playing 'Please Be Naked' to me."

Why the fuck would you slip that out.

"Are you trying to hint at something?" he smirks, making you press mute and hold your hand over your mouth to hold back the screams you feared would release.

Feeling like your soul was about to leave your body, you couldn't believe he just said that.

Actually, you couldn't believe you would even recommend that song. God, your sleepiness was messing with your mind.

Finding your energy once again, you unmute the call and try to seem unfazed by his last comment. "Yes, that I want to sleep. Goodbye now."

Before you could hit the red button again, you could hear him chanting over the phone to do the exact opposite. "Don't!"

Groaning, you clutch the phone harder in despair. "I am so tired. Don't do this to me, please. I am a girl who values her sleep!" you whine as you hear him continue his light giggles in the background. "If I don't sleep I will die, is this what you want. Are you trying to kill me?"

"I can reassure you I don't plan on keeping you up long," he explains. "And I wouldn't dare wish for your death."

Your heart fluttering, you glare at your chest. "Then what do you want?"

Moving his phone from one ear to the other, he lays in his bed while smiling at his ceiling. "You," he declares, making you widen your eyes as he shuffles around in his blanket. "Tomorrow, let's hang out."

Sitting up against your bed frame, you furrow your brow. "Hang out? For what?" There's no way you will be able to act normal for a long period of time, your weak-self can't do it.

Placing a hand over his chest, he lets out a light hiss in fake hurt by your comeback before continuing. "Can't I hang out with you by choice and not by a work schedule? Unless you're so disgusted by me." That's when he started his fake cries. "I'm so sorry I am not Matt Healy and can't do a great British accent."

Shaking your head, you try to intervene as his ugly cries become louder through the line. "That's not what I meant, stop being dramatic," you complain as he instantly stops while smiling widely. "Is there a specific reason why you want to hang out?"

Taking a deep breath, he fiddles with the fingers on his non-occupied hand. "Does there need to be a reason?"

You pause for a second. He's acting too kind for your liking and it's making you question what his intentions are. In this point of time, you're sure he's going to take that moment to convince you to work with him in Canada.

"With you there's always a reason."

Scoffing lightly, he grumbles. "I just want to go on a hike and need a hiking partner."

Oh hell no, you already did enough working out this evening. You were not about to do that again, that's for sure.

"Yeah, nooo," you exhale lowly. "I already did too much working out with my body if you know what I mean and-"

"I don't know what that means," he cuts you off.

"It means I am going to be sore for days so my body has no strength to walk for more than five minutes," you declare as he falls silent.

After a few seconds that felt like forever, he replies. "Fine," he blankly states. "Have a goodnight, sweetheart."

The warmth as blood began drawing to your face became present as you quickly reply with a simple "night" before ending the call. And for some reason you felt as if you couldn't breathe normally by the pounding on your chest.

What the hell was happening to you. Looking up at the ceiling, you silently pray you don't have a Lady Gaga 2.0 fiasco.

As you were questioning why your heart made you feel as if you were going under cardiac arrest the night before, your body was currently making you feel if you really needed to make that trip to the ER by how tender you were.

It also didn't help that Jules was the one waking you up at the crack of dawn, half asleep with her eye mask clinging onto her forehead.

"W-why are you-" you grumble, rubbing your eyes as you look at the alarm clock near your bedside. "-waking me up at 6:18am? It's Saturday."

She sent you a death glare for assuming she randomly wanted to wake you up for the fun of it as she was the one who was woken up first. "Someone's here for you."

Positioning your body upwards, you squint your eyes up at her. "What are you talking about?"

"Why don't you take a look for yourself," she gritted her teeth, swaying her head towards your door.

Slowly standing up, you make your way to it before sneaking a peak of the view of your living room. That's when you see a very annoying man you were sure you both agreed on the phone last night to not go hiking.

Luckily, he didn't notice your wandering eyes as his were glued to his phone, scrolling through his social media.

What was he doing here? You can't face him without thinking about his body wrapped around yours and his lips doing dangerous things.

Oh no, you truly were screwed.

Lightly shutting your door, you nervously turn back to your roommate who looks displeased. "I told him no."

"No means yes, I guess," she replies, snaking her arms around her body for warmth. "I'm going back to bed."

You could hear her walk out of your room as you frantically begin searching for something warm yet comfortable clothes to wear on this undesired hike. You knew if you tried backing out he would stay until you caved, he was very persistent to get what he wanted.

And what he wanted was for you to get your ass up and exercise.

You were also certain you heard Jules let out a "thanks for the invite" to him before hearing her bedroom door shut.

Running out of your room, you made sure not to look in his direction so he wouldn't see your morning appearance clearly- well he already has but why reveal yourself in this state again?

Quickly brushing your hair, teeth, and washing your face, you change into a baggy green sweatshirt and some black workout leggings before slipping on suited running shoes.

Try to act natural. Give him little attention so he won't speculate anything. You aren't into old men and did not vision him smooching you on your sofa.

"You are so buying me breakfast," you deadpan as you walked straight out of your door, not even daring to wait for him to follow.

Good, be straightforward.

Laughing to himself, Pedro promptly jumped off the couch and jogged after you once you shut the door on him and continued down the halls to the elevators.

Finally catching up, he barely made it through the elevator doors as they were closing to find you leaning against the corner, mad and tired. "Good morning to you, too."

You let out a small cry as you lay your head against the wall in pain from how frustratingly exhausted you were. If one cold breeze hit you outside you were sure you were going to burst into tears.

"Oh, come one," he walks over to you and nudged your shoulder to wake up some more. If he unexpectedly touched you again you were sure you were going to rip his arm off. "In a few minutes you'll be wide awake and fine."

"How dare you assume I'm going to be fine!" you whine, trying to hit his side but he manages to capture your arm and that's when you give up and allow your worn out body to fall on him.

He instantly wraps his arms around you as your head falls just beneath his chin, your eyes slowly closing and your thoughts drifting away as his warmth was making you drowsy.

You tried to stay focus, but your poor state was taking over and you suddenly weren't as anxious as you once were. Being sleepy really made your mind roam.

"Hey, now," he whispers and looks down to see you snuggling up against him. "You can't fall asleep on me. I do not want your security guards thinking I drugged you."

Tightening your arms on how lower sides, you ignore him as you feel yourself easing closer to dozing off by the constant beating of his heart. "Stop," you mumble, clutching your ears softly before positioning your head on the other side of his chest.

"What?" he curiously glances down at you.

"You heartbeat's annoying me," you lightly whine. "It's pounding against my ears."

Pedro was extremely glad you were too tired to process his heartbeat and the bright red tint plastered across his face. Your drained-self definitely saved him from embarrassment.

Finally, the elevator doors opened and you still weren't moving. You were too comfortable to make any effort to walk on your own and if he really wanted you to hang out this morning then he was going to have to find a way to make you move.

And to him, dragging you was his best option yet. But with care.

Delicately keeping his arms secured around you, he gradually walked out with you still engulfed by him, eyes shut and only moving your feet with his pace.

Honestly, you were surprised how much rhythm you had.

Stopping to pull out his car keys, he unlocked his car and opened his passenger side door once you two reached the garage complex. Gently, laying you on the seat, you station you head against the headrest as he buckled you in. "God, I really hope security doesn't report me."

And once he made it to his side and hopped in, he laughed at the state you were in, head instantly bent to your side and legs tangled together in hope to create some kind of warmth. "Adorable."

But of course you were too dumb to not catch that.

You were awoken by a small speed bump and the instant hit of warmth through the heat vents, your eyes slowly glancing around your surroundings. Taking a quick peep at the screen indicating the time, you read that it was almost 7am.

Tilting your head and leaning against the headrest, you lazily stare at Pedro as he continues to drive to god knows where.

"Don't I look so handsome in the morning?" he jokes before meeting your eyes, sending you a warm grin.

And handsome on top of you.

Shutting your eyes tightly, you beg your imagination to please shut the fuck up.

"You mean drastic," you mutter, moving your head to the opposite side, against the window to force some sleep again.

Better to make time fly by faster knocking out where you were sure you wouldn't say anything stupid.

"Hey, no..." he whines, moving his right arm across to shake your chin softly to keep you conscious. "Don't pass out on me again, I'm lonely."

"And I'm tired, deal with it."

Shuffling in his seat, he looks over to see you curling yourself up in a ball with your legs to your knees and arms wrapped around. Not thinking things throughly, he hits the brakes hard for a split second and watches as your body jolts forward before swinging back against his seat.

"What the fuck!" you shriek, propping your body up and facing him in pure rage. "Are you trying to irritate me?!"

"I'm lonely and you're not helping," Pedro calmly states, shrugging as you continue your daggers his way.

You were beyond pissed. How could he think you would be energetic and talkative right now? How could he attempt to make you fly out the window? You could feel your nerves slowly fading away by the fury growing inside you.

If he wanted you awake then fine, you were going to be awake.

Doesn't mean you had to talk though.

Silently sitting up, you stare at the windshield in front of you and watch the cars drive as he continues to spare you a glance every once in a while.

Honestly, your silence was terrifying the fuck out of him. Normally, you would have some snarky comeback or violent punch to return to his evil tactics, but you were doing nothing.

Literally nothing.

And he knows damn well the sights of trees and cars did not interest you.

"Hey...," you feel Pedro lightly poke your side, pursing his lips once he saw your non-existent reaction. "You're not mad, right?"

Ignoring him, you continue your deep stare now onto more trees as you two were getting closer to nature than streets. You must've been out for some time as you barely noticed how far away from the city you really were.

Joon would really love this.

Gradually lifting his arm up, his places it on top of your own and gives it a small squeeze while laying it there. "C'mon, don't ignore me."

As if that would make you stop your scheme.

Blinking slowly, you acted like you paid no attention to his puppy dog pleads as the car was making its way towards an almost empty parking lot, all surrounded by a forest that only had one route starting within an old wooden bridge.

Pulling up to a nearby parking spot, Pedro parked the car before turning back to try and capture your attention but nothing was working.

You were so damn frustrating, it was infuriating. But he was still desperate to gain your attention.

"Are you just going to sit in here all day or what?" he questions as he waves a hand over your face to make you blink.

You didn't and that kind of frightened him. Work of the devil.

"I am going to cry," he warned, swatting his hand over his face to prepare for his fake tears.

Yet you showed no mercy. Sitting there patiently, you inhaled and exhaled softly, causing him to internally flip the fuck out because why were you being so aggravating when the two of you should be walking and pointing out the squirrels fighting over nuts.

And sadly, he was slowly giving up.

"Imagine if I really was crying," he began, offended you did not care one bit. "Really means a lot how unconcerned you are."

But when you suddenly started examining your nails and carefully picking at them is when he totally lost it.

Reaching over to you and moving his arm down your arm, he swiftly intertwined your fingers with his before moving you posture to face him.

His hand was huge.

"No, no-" he started, pulling a face as you gave him a blank stare back. Act natural. Pulling your shared hands in front of his chest, he sulks. "-please, for the love of whichever god you believe in, or if you're an atheist- for the love of you, please talk to me."

Watching him beg for forgiveness has always been funny in the past, but his pleading for attention now makes you feel bad.

"If you talk to me I will buy you breakfast and a very delicious milkshake that will make you extremely happy for the rest of the day," he continues, using his free left arm to wrap around you as his right one still clutches onto your palm.

He's so warm.

Pursing your lips a bit, you send him a skeptical glance. "Oreo shake with a lot of whipped cream?"

He instantly nods, a smile breaking out. "Of course, anything you want."

You look at the car's steering wheel before averting your eyes back to his. "And a red cherry?"

"I'll buy you a full jar of cherries if it makes you happy," he declares.

"And fries?"

Agreeing, he lets out a quick nod again. "With extra seasoning."

Biting your lip, you proceed to think about other stuff you may want with your milkshake and fries. "A burger?"

"My goodness, woman" he sighs, letting go of you and jumping out of the car before running around to your side and opening your door. "I'll buy you the whole menu, now let's go!"

With that, he vigorously yet cautiously pulls you out of your seat and throws you over his shoulders.

"Oh no!" you squeal, trying to find something to hold on to as he begins his journey, walking towards the bridge to start the hike. Grabbing a hold of his neck, you try not to choke him as you place your arm around it.

If you were going down, you were sure you were going to break his neck in the process. At least it would be a learning lesson for him.

"If you drop me I am never talking to you again," you threaten as he continues down a path.

"Said that before and just did it half the car ride here," he begins, moving his shoulder to give you a little fright of your life. "Now I just found out that all I have to do is buy you food and you'll yap again."

Glaring, you choke him a little to which he chuckles. "Didn't know you were into that."

Speechless, you couldn't believe his words. What the hell was he on this morning?

"Put me down!" you exclaim, immediately moving your body so he would lose his balance. Once he did so, you scowl as he ruffles your hair, making it tangle around. "Hey!"

"Can you stop being negative for a few minutes and enjoy the environment?" he asks, pulling his arms up to twirl around. "Just take in that fresh air mother nature gifted us."

Scrunching your nose, you frown. "It smells like rotten eggs."

"Because of the ducks," he pointed out before patting his pockets. "Which we will be feeding with the bread I brought."

Examining his pocket, you shoot him a curious glance. "How big are your pockets?"

"Not important," he states, grabbing your arms and dragging you along with him down the long trail. "What's important is finishing this trail to feel accomplished."

Pouting, you allowed him to drag you along as you miserably dreaded the next few hours to come. The energy you had to give off just for some damn breakfast.

Shame on you for loving food so much.

Encountering many frogs, lizards, and pigeons who loved flying right by both of your heads and scaring you to death, you had long forgotten about how anxious you were being around him. Being distracted constantly had you occupied which was a relief.

Eventually, you two finally found the drugs.

Or the ducks.

Walking by a huge pond, there were numerous amounts of ducks leaping around with their families following behind. It was really cute, but the smell wasn't.

"I wonder if they can choke on this?" Pedro muttered as he pulled out a large bread. Slowly nearing one medium-seized one in caution, he rips a piece apart and throws it. "It is kind of thick."

Taking a moment to check the bread out, you sigh. "Are you feeding these ducks bolillo bread?"

He pauses, not sure why you would care to ask. "Yes and?"

"They have thick crusts!" you exclaim. "And why not just feed them normal wheat bread?"

"Who even eats wheat? It's bland." he protests. "Plus, this is leftovers from my dinner last night."

"They're ducks! They don't care," you argue as he shakes his head.

"Just imagine if you were a duck," he began, making you huff in annoyance as you just knew he was going to say something ridiculous. "Wouldn't you love to eat this nice bolillo bread, maybe visualize a torta with some carnitas, onions, avocado, can't forget the refried bean-"

"The duck is choking!" you squeal and stare in fear as the poor duck starts to wheeze sharply.

Pedro's facial expressions drops as he sees the poor duck quacking in agony. Nervously rushing to its side, he looks up at you. "Do we pat its back? CPR? Call 911?!"

Pulling out your phone, you type away to find answers for your current problem. It was indeed true that you aren't supposed to feed ducks bread.

Especially thick Mexican ones.

"Give it mouth to mouth if you want chlamydia," you read aloud, causing Pedro to instantly leap away from the duck as it hastily begins to lay on the ground. "Wait, you get that from birds, not ducks. Silly me."

"Ducks are birds," he discloses, trying his best to softly pat the ducks back, finally giving it one powerful swat to help but instead the duck ends ups being thrown a few feet away by his force.

"Do I look like a fucking duck doctor?" you spit out, making him look up confused.

"You mean a veterarian."

Ignoring his last comment, you continue scrolling through more of google's suggestions, finally finding some information that may help. "You need to press down on its chest with 1-2 fingers or just give them water to drown it down."

Immediately grabbing the duck and placing it on its back, you worriedly watch over the duck from Pedro's shoulder as he works his fingers on the poor animal.

However, no luck was given as the duck was beginning to look weak and drowsy as pressure kept being projected on its chest. "We need water!"

Running towards the pond, you motion for Pedro to follow along with the duck as you look for a safe ramp to lead the duck onto. "Let's just lay him down near the water and splash him with it."

"He?" Pedro asks, stopping his movements. "But it looks like a she-"

"We are not arguing over its gender when its literally dying in your arms!" you exclaim, causing him to quickly nod and follow the ramp you found towards the water.

Gently, Pedro lowered his arms near the water with the poor duck taking over his hands. Trying to move the flow of water towards its face, he calls you over. "He's not accepting it, you need to scoop some up in your hand and pour it over his beak."

Rapidly nodding, you do as he says and take a handful and try not to spill it before gradually pouring it over the duck's beak. This water was not clean, but at least it was something. Nothing was happening until your third scoop once the duck began to actually swallow some of the water slowly.

"I-I think it's working! We did it!" Pedro cheered, trying to give you a high-five, failing incredibly as he somehow managed to lose his grip and dump the poor duck hard in the pond. "Oh shit!"

Squatting down, you try to reach for the duck as its face was buried underneath the water before Pedro's body slams into yours, causing you to fall into the dirty, cold pond.

The feeling of thick, muddy water overtakes your body as you lose all sight of air. Quickly moving your arms up and down, you rise back to the surface to find Pedro with his hands over his mouth and his jaw dropped.

He knew he wasn't going to hear the end of it.

"Fuck," he nervously muttered to himself before reaching out for you. "I am so so so sorry, the leaf made me slip AH!-"

He couldn't finish his sentence as you yanked his arm down with you, pulling with almighty to get him to land in the pond. The weight of the water going down with his body diving harshly against it, you knew he was completely soaked.

And probably pissed, but its okay. It's what he deserves.

Waiting for him to come up, he finally did so in seconds looking very unhappy. It made you delighted.

"You did that on purpose!"

Scoffing, you splash him and watch as he gasps harder. "You do a lot of things on purpose."

Using both hands to release bigger waves, he splashes you back. "Don't splash me!"

Growling, you slap his chest as he clutches your wrist afterwards. "You're so lucky I forgot my phone at home."

Gasping, you feel one of his hands fly underwater. "I didn't!" You hold in your giggles as he shuffles frantically before moving his gaze back up. "Wait, I never removed it from my glove department. Be fortunate I forgot it because if you destroyed it I would've made you walk home."

Furrowing your brows, you push his shoulders and make him move back by the force of it. "You're the one who started it. We're gonna get duck chlamydia now!"

Rolling his eyes, he pushed you back, causing you to fall under the water. Once you caught your breath again you notice the way he glares at you. "That's not even a thing."

"Just another STD to add to your list," you jokingly mumble to yourself, sure he didn't catch it.

You were wrong, again.

Launching himself onto you, the two of you fall underwater as he shoves you body around in revenge. Swimming back up, you gasp for air while slapping his arms off you as he tried blocking all your attempts.

Wrapping his arms around your waist, he clings his face on your shoulder as he proceeds to try and bring you down under but somehow you manage to wrap your leg around his thigh, causing him to lose his strength and fall backwards with you on top of him.

He sure has one strong grip.

Now, not saying you were going to kill him. But this was your chance to kill him with no witnesses.

Well- besides the ducks, but they wouldn't quack a soul.

Regaining his energy, he lifts himself back up and holds you up, about to drag you under again before you crazily oppose while shaking your head, "Don't! We're gonna get sick!"

"That's not a very sincere apology," he tilts his head, his wet hair scattered across his face as he awaits your alibi.

Huffing, you fight back a rude remark. "Do you understand how much poop were swimming in right now? These ducks are probably laughing at us by how much they are quacking."

Swiftly looking around, the two of you check the surrounding ducks around who blankly stare back. The older looking ones hollering nonsense, probably making plans to kill you and Pedro.

"I bet their releasing their chlamydia right now," you cry, hiding your face in his shoulder as he bursts out laughing.

"I don't think that's how it works."

Glancing down on him, you're surprised by his strength. He's been holding you up by your waist for so long you're shocked he hasn't dropped you accidentally yet. "Let's not find out, let's get out."

"You're forgetting something," he smiles, staring innocently at you, knowing damn well you can't leave without his release. "And I wouldn't wait this one out because I am pretty sure I feel toads swimming near my feet."

Instantaneously, you clung onto him tighter in fear as you could imagine the feeling of something swarming around your body. It was like hundred of spiders crawling all over you, you needed to get out of here.

Pulling yourself back up, you place your hands on his shoulders as he impassively stares back at you, waiting. "Fine," you huff. "I'm sorry for claiming you had STD's before."

Pedro just stays there, not moving an inch as if he wants more. Groaning, you knew he wasn't going to give in so easy. "And I am sorry for stimulating the idea that you would get duck chlamydia," you apologize. "But you can get E. coli."

That didn't help as he just helplessly eyed you, not impressed with your poor excuses of your so-called apologies. What more did he want? You can't necessarily beg on your knees, you're in the water!

Whining, you knew you had to pull out your sincere face. You just knew your Oscar-worthy acting was about to award you freedom.

Softly, you move strands of hair stuck near his eyes away from his face and brush his hair back before quivering your lips and looking down upon him in sorrow.

He has really pretty eyes.

"I'm really sorry," you start as you push your face inside his neck and lock him inside your arms. "I know you don't have any infections, you don't even have visible rashes or sores to prove it."

Pedro finds your plead for forgiveness charming as you squeeze him tighter. He begins to release you until he hears the mutter of your "-that are visible."

"You couldn't hold it in for a few more seconds?!" he whined at how fast you went back to insulting him.

Sighing heavily, you slap a hand to your face. "It's hard!"

Suppressing a laugh, he unwrapped his arms around you and let you get back to the sidewalk. But once you were back on your feet, you looked down to find your body filled with random pieces of dirt, sticks, and grass. "Ew!"

"You're not sitting in my car," Pedro states, waving his head side to side to release some water from his ears.

"You're worse than me!"

"My car, my rules."

Frowning, you weren't sure if he was kidding or not. "Well, you almost committed first-degree-murder so if you don't want people to know you must be my personal servant."

His instant glare turned into confusion as he abruptly moved his attention back towards the pond. "Where did the duck go?"

Widening your eyes, you forgot that you had a helpless duck in your hands minutes ago before your splash attack with Pedro. Scanning your eyes from the sidewalks to the ramps to the pond, you noticed a duck floating nearby. "I think that's them."

Pointing at a duck with the closest familiar colors than the rest, you felt Pedro let out of sigh of relief. "Thank goodness, I would have felt extremely guilty if she would have died."

"It could be a he," you snap back.

He was about to protest but honestly, you were done for the day. You just wanted to take a long and hot shower and knock back out. Not only that, but you ruined your cute running shoes you gifted yourself months ago for your work out journey.

You never really wore them, but it's the thought that counts.

"We can get breakfast another day," you plead to which he didn't argue over because he really wanted to remove the unknown substances off his body asap.

He wouldn't admit it, but he was genuinely scared he may have gotten duck chlamydia .

"Okay, but no sleeping in the car," Pedro states as you exhale loudly. All this and you still weren't allowed to doze off, how cruel is life at the moment.

Walking back to the car would've went down smoothly if the two of you weren't given disturbed looks from strangers and your clothes weren't clinging uncomfortably to your bodies, especially your shoes.

Luckily, Pedro had towels in his trunk and set them down on the seats. "God, I am definitely going to need a deep cleaning after this."

Slipping inside, your hands find the heater and turn it on full blast. Not only was it freezing outside, but your drenched state made you feel like an icicle.

Setting off back to the road, your mind begins to wander back to the question that has been flooding your mind lately. Craning you neck towards his presence, you make out his comfort state. Cool, he's calm.

Here goes nothing.

"So," you start, awkwardly playing with your hands as you try to make direct eye-contact with him as he turns his head to you. "Why did you visit the other morning?"

Lifting a brow, he pulls a face. "Other morning?"

Biting the inside of the cheek, you try to sound composed. "Yeah, remember? You dropped by around 6am-"

"-and you thought I was Lady Gaga, slammed the door on my face, and went back to bed?" he finished, grinning while finding your eyes again. "You mean that day?"

"Well if you knew what I was talking about why make me recall those mortifying details?" you grumble, leaning back against your seat. "And I thought you were a cat."

"I figured, I always questioned why Jules would ramble on about buying Lady Gaga a new electric litter box until I connected the dots," he confessed making you let out a small chuckle.

Yeah, you clearly remember how upset Jules became when Lady Gaga neglected the expensive box.

"But if you're curious, it wasn't because I wanted to go hiking," he smiled, referring to the current day.

"Then why?"

He paused for a minute, checking his mirrors before switching lanes. "I'm not really sure."

Tilting your head a bit, you express curiosity as you glance back. "I don't understand?"

Laughing lowly, he slightly shook his head. "I did wake up real fucking early that day," he started. "Maybe around 4am? Which sucked because I must've gotten like 3-4 hours of sleep."

"So you decided to wake me up so I could feel your pain?"

"No," he stifled another chuckle. "To plant trees."

Squinting your eyes, you become very confused. What is he talking about? He noticed your puzzlement immediately. "You know, go early in the morning to different areas in the city and help dig and replace old trees to plant new ones."

This whole time you were flipping out, wondering why he randomly came early in the morning just to find out it was because he's a nature boy who wants to help out the community?

It was very sweet of him to be as helpful as he was, but you were a little disappointment it wasn't something more.

"That's why?" you ask and he nods. "And why no warning?"

"Well, I was going to call but I figured all that studying you had done the evening before may have knocked you out early," he confessed.

Yet he still made you wake up early today knowing damn well you were exhausted last night. Strange.

"Why me?" you giggle. "I'm not your typical nature girl, Joon would've been perfect for the job."

Shrugging, he leaned his elbow on his middle console. "I thought about asking him, but to be honest I didn't want to pay for any damages he may have caused."

That was a very accurate insight of what Joon really was, clumsy. The amount of times he accidentally dropped his coffee cups, tripped over wires backstage, and face-planted against glass doors would be too much to count on both your palms.

You're surprised he hasn't broken his back again- but still glad he hasn't. That would really suck.

"But have you thought things over yet?" Pedro glanced your way before looking back forward. "About Canada?"

Stiffing up a bit, you move your eyes to the dashboard. You weren't dreading this conversation, but you didn't want to talk about it.

This was a situation where it was a win but also a loss.

Win as in gaining incredible experience, loss that your parent's wouldn't be pleased, it was in a different country, and you'd be missing out on your social life for almost a year.

"Not really," you admit and sense from the corner of your eyes his shoulders fall. "Still indecisive, as always," you try joking to lighten the mood.

Sending over a tiny grin, he mirrors your same expression, doubtful. His face turns concentrated again, leaning closer to you before he shuts down again, ultimately rejecting whatever idea he had going on.

The rest of the drive back to your place went by fast. The two of you made little talk about each other's life and how school was going for you, but he already knew so much already from past encounters.

Pulling up to the red curb you loathe, you crack a scowl as he only returns a smirk at his doing. "I will personally send my property manager to you so she can threaten you."

"I do love threats," he beamed, watching as you reach for the handle before stopping you by his voice. "-but I had fun this morning, despite our little uh...catastrophe," he chuckled, looking down at his clothes.

"I totally agree," you grin. "Dirt just looks so good on me."

He sniggers lightly before slightly sobering up. "But seriously, think about the offer," he begins, nipping at his lip a bit, not trying to put too much pressure on you. "It'll be good for you, you know- your future."

Sighing, you nod. You knew where he was coming from since he's been doing this for so long, but you were still young and had a lot on your mind.

"I'll think about it," you smile, reaching for the door handle and swiftly getting out, missing the way his smile slowly vanishes.

Taking your usual step back, you send him a farewell wave but he does his habitual goodbyes as he gets out of his car and grins to you. "See you around." Laughing, you walk inside the doors and make your way to the elevators, his followed soft "beautiful" being muffled by the traffic on the streets.

It seemed like both of you were screwed.

taglist: @thesapphirequeen @floralsightings @wrathofcats @avengersheart @fafik7 @chimchimjiminie16 @adriennemichelle98

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal imagine #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal x y/n #pedro pascal x you #joel miller #tlou #tlou joel #pascalispunk #joel miller x reader #the last of us #pedro pascal angst #pedro pascal fluff #pedropascaledit #fanfiction

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rescue-ram · 7 months

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Why The Joker Is Wild Hits Different

I was thinking about this last month when I wrote 'The Time Has Come For Us To Say Sayonara', and I'm feeling motivated to write up my thoughts tonight. I'm going to list my reasons why this episode in particular rubs people the wrong way roughly in order of importance.

1) Timing This is the most obvious reason but it bears mentioning. Because yeah, the episode where Hawkeye's friends team up to drive him crazy in the same season that ends with Hawkeye having a serious Mental Health Crisis definitely changes the impression this episode leaves, especially in rewatches. I've seen theories that it was intentional foreshadowing, as well as that it was meant to be a lighthearted throwback episode that's just squiffy in execution; both seem plausible. But regardless, I think the timing increases negative feelings towards this episode among people for whom it doesn't land.

2) The Pranks Are Lame This might seem petty or subjective, but the more I thought about it the more important it seemed. Because MASH has a lot of pranks, and the ones people remember and like the most are the most outrageous ones- there are a lot of creative set ups, and some opportunities for great prop or physical comedy. But the pranks in TJIW all happen off screen, for punchline reasons, and with the possible exception of Klinger blowing himself up are all very tame and unremarkable. The "victims" reactions are not particularly hilarious either. This means there's little entertainment value in the pranks themselves, so all of the focus stays on Hawkeye's reactions, and his reactions are "increasingly irrational intense distress" which obviously some people will find very difficult or upsetting to watch.

3) No Back And Forth Other "prank war" episodes are just that- a war. There's retaliation and escalation and often a final twist to the conflict that keeps the action moving. Hawkeye never gets to retaliate or take the upper hand until the very very end of the episode- he's not even really fighting for it. He's consistently put in a reactive and vulnerable position throughout the episode, so it feels targeted in a way that's usually reserved for characters we're meant to dislike and not empathize with- but Hawkeye is our charismatic protagonist, we're constantly invited to empathize with him! So seeing him get picked on and not fight back kind of sucks for a lot of people, especially if, in putting yourself in his shoes, you would find this an insanely upsetting scenario to find yourself in.

4) No A-Plot Other "prank war" episodes are usually paired with a much more serious dramatic story line. Even "April Fools", one of the silliest, has the characters seriously thinking they're all about to be court-martialed. "An Eye for a Tooth" has Mulcahy fighting for a promotion, "Bottoms Up" has Margaret reckoning with her friend's alcoholism- even "The Smell of Music", which has one of the meanest things they do to Charles, has an A-Plot where Potter tries to help a suicidal soldier. The pranks are a welcome break in tension, and the more serious subject matter means they don't get as closely analyzed by the audience- they are straight up comedic relief. But in TJIW, there is no other plot- our focus stays, relentlessly, on Hawkeye losing it. There's no break from the tension, and as already established the weak pranks mean they don't provide that release in themselves. It is very easy to get stuck stewing in Hawkeye's distress.

5) Bad Casus Belli I really think, if Hawkeye had been the one to issue the bet- "Yeah, I said your prank was stupid and I'll say it again, Trap and I coulda pranked all of you in 24 hours or less and you'd've never seen it coming"- that A LOT of this episode's problems would decrease. His come-uppance would at least feel earned- Hawkeye has hubris, gets punished, punchline. But that isn't what happens!! BJ is exhausted and in a bad mood. He takes it out on Hawkeye in a petty destructive prank. Hawkeye is annoyed, and BJ gets mad at him for being annoyed, and then cold bloodedly manipulates him into a bet he fully intends to cheat, in order to punish him for... not finding having his boot ruined funny? For talking about Trapper? There's no explanation given for why the other characters go along with it, especially a character like Mulcahy who not only participates, but is gleeful about it to an extent that's kinda OOC. Hawkeye's punishment feels more like the sort of thing dealt out to Frank, who we expected to deserve it because he was so consistently awful. Why does Hawkeye, our loveable hardworking part-time prankster full-time doctor, deserve to get humiliated? It's charitable to say it's a lack of inciting incident causing problems- to be uncharitable, we'd have to say the inciting incident is BJ taking out his temper on Hawkeye in an honestly pretty cruel way. I say cruel especially given his reaction to seeing Hawkeye lose it in the ward was to make it worse by deliberately feeding Hawkeye's paranoia after Klinger's prank. If you are not a fan which finds BJ's fits of "evil genius" funny in themselves then yeah, the unearned targeting feels infuriating.

#mash

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freakadr0id · 11 months

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Rewatching Season 4 and Talking About Tang to Avoid Losing My Mind Over the Special

Welp, now that I have some free time and I'm finally back home, it's the perfect time for me to obsess over LMK again. That being said, I'm not going to talk about the Chinese release of the special as I'm waiting for the full English release (I've been spoiled on things, but I still haven't seen it).

Instead, I'm going to watch through season 4 again since it's been a while. It’s just a silly little thing I like to do during hiatus and such. Oh, and I really only talk about Tang because he doesn’t get enough love and, well, I have a brand to maintain.

So, let's start with Episode 2 - New Adventures:

~-~

Getting a bit full of yourself there, aren’t ya, glowy boy? Geez, you make an insanely strong power-up sigil that covers half the globe one time, and suddenly, you think you're all that.

...Okay, maybe his overconfidence is a little bit justified. Only a little bit, though, since the last time he was this full of himself was, well… *looks at Dumpling Destruction*

On a side note, it's interesting how Sandy says "newfound powers" since that implies a relatively short timespan between seasons 3 and 4. My guess is around 1-2 months, but I honestly don't know.

At least Tang has Pigsy to bring him down to Earth. Nice to see a bit of their salty/sassy banter back again.

I've mentioned this gif before but Idk I still love it. Mei totally goes full Ash Ketchem and just throws him out there. I asked a while back which Pokemon Tang would be and some people replied with Ninjask, a Cicada inspired Pokemon, which yeah. 10/10, A+ pick.

Oh nooooooo Tang... I love you, but noooooooo *More Dumpling Destruction Flashbacks*

Told ya. Hubris gets you nowhere.

Talk about being in the shadow of your former self, am I right?

I never turned on subtitles for this scene before so I had no idea what ink Tang Sanzang said up until this rewatch. Now that I know what he says, this line is SUPER interesting if you ask me.

This line stands out as it doesn't seem to be feeding directly into his insecurities, as is the case with every other ink creature encounter we see. Instead, it seems like a confirmation of Tang's arc throughout the season. Tang can't use his powers here because he has more to learn, both with his powers and as a character, and this is the writers deliberately saying as much. Yeah, Tang's journey isn't complete, and the audience, and perhaps, Tang himself, knows it.

Yeah, I'm cheating here since it doesn't really have Tang in it, but it doesn't matter because it's still Tang's glasses -plus this is just a darn good shot. It's so quick, but it does a great job of establishing a feeling of dread and tension in this scene. It definitely got me the first time I saw it. It's on-screen for only a second, but damn if it isn't effective.

~-~

Not a ton of Tang in this episode, but that's okay because it still does a TON of legwork in setting the foundation for his character arc this season.

To be honest, I didn't mean to mention Dumpling Destruction that much in this post but that's really what came to mind the first time I saw this episode. And honestly? I think that was completely intentional on the writers' part.

Tang was horrendously overconfident and, one could argue, arrogant in Dumpling Destruction. He was undeniably annoying at times (to put it in the kindest way possible) and even I, who absolutely adores his character, has a hard time watching Dumpling Destruction because of that. I get a similar feeling watching Tang in this episode, but that isn't a bad thing this time.

Despite my dislike of Tang's arrogance and his (often) unfounded overconfidence, I'm glad it came back in full force this episode. After season 3, I was a little worried that was all we'd get for Tang's character development. We saw almost none of his arrogance in season 3, which, along with the exploration of his insecurities, made it seem that they just wanted to ignore those character flaws tat were more prevalent in earlier episodes. It seems silly in hindsight, as it's clear that season 3 merely kickstarted his arc and wasn't a completion of it.

This episode was precisely what Tang needed for his character development. Despite expanding his character in season 3, his character flaws are still very much there at the start of season 4. He has yet to overcome his flaws and shortcomings at this point in the show, but without a reason to change, he never will. So how do you develop a character rife with overconfident and occasionally arrogant tendencies? Humble the hell out of them, of course. Unfortunately, he needed to be brought down to Earth before he could build himself back up, and that's just what the writers did in this episode.

~-~

Ha! Didn't expect a rant at the end of this, did ya? Yeah, neither did I. Sorry about that.

I'll do the rest of the season soon, especially with how Tang-heavy the next couple episodes are.

#monkie kid #lego monkie kid #lmk #lmk tang #lego monkie kid tang #I guess you could say it's a little bit of an analysis too #but eh idk #tang is so cringe sometimes #gotta love him for it though #I know I do #goofy nerd boy just tries his best #4x02

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nutzworth · 1 month

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its been a whole month. but you know what time it is? thats right.

DAY 6: MARCH 17, 2024

STATS: read for 1 hour 20 minutes (WEAK.) pages read: 1359-1592. 233 pgs slur count: 9 + 3 = 12 (dave, john x2. r slur) silly count: 11 + 1 = 12 (wv about his drawings) (i REALLY feel like i missed some... but whatever.) piss count: 2/3 (!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) (dave pissed in his shower)

THOUGHTS: ok i didnt think a lot this round cus its like nearing midnight on a school night so im reading for funsies ok

act 4 has the story bouncing around way more than it did in previous acts. i saw a lot of the exiles today. and a lot of TROLLS! the exiles are so fun today i saw some pm and ar lore and wv pm ar all fought and then they had a meal. and wv and ar are trying to win over pm but she dont care. the WOMEN. panel. so good.

somethin else i reaaally noticed this time around is HOW GOOD HUSSIE WRITES! seriously these kids are talking so naturally its insane. i really like it. theyre so cute. they talk like me and my friends and its really good. hussies a really good writer guys

why did dave say that "i should probably text [john] soon. cus. i love him" why did he say that? and rose's "I know." why? what? im sure this has been read into like a million times but it feels so OUT OF POCKET. why did he SAY THAT? why does rose KNOW? what is anything.

today was the introduction to rose's exile and land. the land of light and rain. the combination of the land and the weird cursive exile and the weird loneliness and silence just really... it really creeps me out ok. "A mother does what's best for her children" with the empty dock with a cut rope and the martini. ugh. "There are footprints in the white sand." oh my god. IT CREEPS ME OUT. its SO QUIET it freaks me. augh. i love you rose

DAVE PEED THIS ROUND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! the next (and last) on the piss counter is in the middle of act 6 so were gonna be sitting pretty for a damn while. daves kind of a freak to be real. he says "voyeurbot" and "little girl" in the same sentence. why did he say this?

PA HARLEY. PA HARLEY ON LAND OF WIND AND SHADE!!!! WOOOOOO!!!!!!!! oh oh aaaalso jade mentioned her penpal (JAKE!!!) and it got me a little excited. teehee. i looove jake english you dont even know

ummm dave entering the game... hes not in yet. but hes toying with his big machines and he got his totem and the object out. his egg. yeah. i didnt realize he was just playing with all this stuff and hes not even in the medium yet. craaaazy

WE SAW TEREZI THREE TIMES TODAY! THATS SO MUCH! SHES SO CUTE! i literally love terezi i always forget but i love her. shes so cool and silly and cute and the best. her convo with rose (her first one?) is so funny and awesome and ahh i love terezi. she says that the two of them were destined to be hatebuddies cus theyre both seers. ahhh

she also mentions some god tiers during that convo which was crazy. seer of mind. page of breath. knight of blood. maid of time. hussie just had this stuff on lock huh. why TAVROS'S classpect? not like vriskas? i dont know man.

karkat was so dumb today i cant even talk about him. he showed up twice and fumbled so bad. girl you havw GOT to stop being mean to people and yes that includes yourself. i really like karkat too i cant lie. hes so dumb so sweet. i love you karkat

jack noir just straight up gives pm a hit list for her king and queen for no reason. i mean yes there is a reason hes like "lol i do this to everyone wouldnt it be crazy if she was the one to get me their crowns lol" why does he do that? does he just have swords and symbols on lock? hes literally crazy

rose does her cool knitting needle in the monster thing. DAVE AND KANAYA CONVERSATION! i love them bad. rose and tavros is also funny but tavros types so much like a tool i can hardly stand it. im gonna be real i dont really like tavros. hes just not my style sorry

thats it sorry for not reading for a month. maybe ill do more this month haha. maybe maybe not. we will see ;-) thanks

#me #nutzworth hs reread #hoooonk shooooo #i wanted to read some homestuck for my birthday so here i am #spring breaks coming up... maybe ill read then #who knoooose

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tragiclilb · 2 years

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☾ ⋆⁺₊⋆ YOUR NAME ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾

(Alex can’t get your name out of his mouth)

(Warnings: fluff, lots, horrible amounts, drinking)

(A/n: Yes I know this should have been more than a oneshot unfortunately i’m a little bitch who refuses)

(Words: 1858)

“Please I swear it will be fun!” He said pulling me into his room.

“Alex, you said that the last party. And we know how that turned out.” I said giving him a telling look.

In the past 4 months he’s had a track record of bad party experiences. He for some reason couldn’t leave a party with out making a girl mad. Each girl seemingly not only furious with him but me as well after. I just have learned to assume it’s because I’m his best mate but, it still always felt a bit odd.

We would go to a party, he would get shit faced, and 2 hours later I would have a girl storming up to me, saying I should deal with him. And I was not looking forward to spending my Friday like that this time.

“Please I’ll do anything. I just need you there.” He said giving me a pouty look. His dark, shoulder length hair falling in-front of his face. Sometimes he’s just so exhausting.

“Oh fine. But this is the last party, I swear.”

“Thank you! Well, we better get going, we’re already late.” He smiles wide and drags me to the car.

“So you sleeping over at mine?” I make sure to ask ahead of time. Knowing I’ll be driving home.

“Yeah, sounds good.” He nods pulling his jacket back in place after the buckle tossed it around. He starts the engine and rolls away driving down a few streets to the house party.

We pull up and immediately I can see it’s already packed. We walk in, the music pounding are ears. It’s some trashy pop song that came out last year. We both looked at each other and laughed a bit at the sound.

“I’ll go get us some drinks, okay?” He yells over the noise.

“Okay sounds good.” I say and he walks away to the kitchen.

I wander around for a while looking to see if I could finds anyone I know. Old friends from when we where in school always tend to show up at these things.

I search around till at the stairs I see Emma, one of my said school friends. She meets my eyes and runs down the stairs her long blonde hair swaying behind her. She was still as gorgeous as ever. She was the type of person in school who everyone was drawn to. She was insanely popular, but kind as well. It’s almost annoying.

“Hi, how have you been.” She smiles.

“Pretty good actually, I’ve been traveling around with the boys for a while. Where back in town for a break though.” I explain and she nods smirking to herself.

“You still hopelessly in love with turner?” She laughs and I fight the urge to smack my hands over her mouth.

“Shhhh, he’s somewhere around here, also we don’t talk about that. It was years ago.” I say looking around panicked. Hoping he didn’t overhear.

“Okay okay, I’m sorry, it was a sweet crush though, you where head over heels.” She giggles, just then I feel a tap on my shoulder.

“For who?” Alex asks innocently, obviously already multiple drinks in.

“No one, just an old school crush.” I say covering for myself. He looks at me with suspicious eyes. He probably noticed he was staring to long so he shakes his head looking down. The drinks obviously getting to him.

“Hey come on, let’s do shots.” He says getting out of his momentary funk grabbing my shoulders.

“Alex, I’m staying sober tonight, you know this. I have to drive you home.” I say and he sighs loudly.

“Your no fun.” He runs his hands through his hair letting go of me and walking to the counter. He takes 3 more shots and scoffs. I feel bad so I walk over to him leaning against the counter next to him. He puts his hand out for me and I grab it. He fiddles with my fingers. Picking at my nail polish which I’ll just have to re apply later.

“I’m sorry for dragging you along, I know you don’t like this stuff.” He says turning to look at me.

“It’s okay, I’m pretty sure I go anywhere you go anyways.” I say jokingly and he smiles to himself getting pink in the face. Probably the alcohol heating him up. He looks back up to my eyes.

“You…. You have really pretty eyes.” He says looking dazed. He makes it so hard to forget about my feelings. He loves to say horribly sweet things when he’s out of it. It’s another reason I didn’t want to come to the party. It hurts hearing him say things I wish he actually felt, only for him to go try and make out with random girls a few minutes later.

“Yeah yeah okay, I’m gonna go get you some water.” I say and go to the back yard looking for a cooler.

Much to my dismay the cooler happened to be In the front yards for some reason. So after 10 minutes of traveling between people and searching for it, I found it and grabbed a few waters. I’m about to walk back in the kitchen when Emma walks up to me.

“Your not gonna believe this. Alex just tried to make out with me. I mean he didn’t hide how insanely drunk he was so his oddness makes sense.” She says looking uncomfortable.

“Oh god I’m so sorry.” I apologize for my best friends behavior.

“You know, he said something weird.” She enquirers.

“Huh?”

“He asked if He could call me your name.” She says funnily.

“Are you kidding?” I say shocked.

“No I swear. I mean he seemed so upset when I walked in the kitchen. He was downing a drink and I asked if he was okay. He kept asking where you had gone.”

“He so dramatic, I told him I was getting water.”

“He was probably to out of it. But I swear he sounded like you used to in school. Him getting all gushy about you.” She laughs. “I swear he’s just as infatuated with you as you where with him. Asking to call me your name and such.” She explains and my eyes go wide. I mean that’s insane right? We’ve been best friends since children.

“Why wouldn’t he just say something to me about it then?” I ask tuning my hand across my face, stressed. I wouldn’t be lying if I said I still felt the same. Watching him over these past few years. Performing the way he does. Getting to sit on the side and watch him. The way his hair fell as he played the guitar. Or the smooth sound of his voice ringing through my ears. He’s entrancing really.

But he always seemed so out of reach when it came to my feelings. He was a star. Who had all the options he wanted. Groupies and such. Why would he want me? So I never acted.

“Well, why didn’t you?” She says giving me a knowing look. “I think you should go speak to him.” She pats my shoulder and sends me into the kitchen. I walk in and I see him hunched over the counter fiddling with an empty shot glass. I walk over taking the shot glass out of his hands, setting it down. I grab his hand and lead the pouting man through the crowd, back out to the car.

“Why are we leaving so soon?” He asks slurred.

“Sweetheart, your drunk of your ass.”

“That’s beside the point.” He rolls his eyes, a big yawn taking over a few seconds later.

He leans his head on my shoulder and without answering his question I drive back to my place. Somehow I get him upstairs into bed without him passing out.

“Darling…” he says his hair falling over his eyes as he lays down.

“Yeah.” I say in the doorway about to head to the couch.

“I wrote a song about you.” He softly grins.

“Oh yeah? Can I hear it?”

“Maybe one day.” He giggles to himself and I can tell he’s to far gone.

“Goodnight Alex.” I say closing the door and going out to the couch.

When I woke the next morning I saw Alex sitting in the chair by the couch. He was drinking something hot as I could see the steam from the cup. I sat up and rubbed my eyes yawning.

“Morning.” He says softly as I get up and walk to the counter boiling some water, and grabbing a tea bag.

“Morning.” I respond in the same soft manner.

“Could we talk about last night.” He asks as I sit back down.

“Yeah I actually wanted to speak about that.” I say and he seams nervous.

“Alex… why did Emma from school tell me you asked to call her my name, before kissing her?” I said being quite blunt with it. If I didn’t get it out now, I never would.

“I- oh god, I’m a mess when I’m drunk aren’t I?” He says trying to laugh it off.

“Alex, be honest with me here, cause I don’t understand how you can say all theses complements and being dare I say flirtatious one minute, and then going and asking to call girls my name if you don’t feel some way…. About me.” I say cautiously. If this goes wrong I’m losing my best friend.

“You’re not wrong.” He says awkwardly.

“I’m not?” I say a bit flabbergasted. But mostly relieved.

“You just… hypnotize me. I can’t explain it. I don’t even know why it took me so long to realize it to be honest.” He says tucking his hair behind his ears. His dark eyes where big, almost surprised at the fact he was saying what he was saying out loud.

“But these past few months, I keep trying to tell you, but I would say something and you’d shoot me down. I would go find some girl to take my mind off you. But it never works. Cause….. cause there not you.”

Oh.

“I’ve loved you since I was thirteen.” I say and I don’t think I’ve ever seen his face flash into a smile so big.

“Well that’s bloody good to hear.” He says.

“I’m sorry I didn’t say anything sooner, it’s just, you could chose anyone you wanted. Girls fawn over you. I just didn’t think it’d be me.” I say honestly and he gets up walking over to me.

“You daft woman.” He says scanning my face. I was confused for a second till he placed a hand to my cheek. His fingers ruff from the years of guitar. His eyes bore into mine making my knees week as he pulled me up. He placed a innocent kiss to my lips. It was almost like an apology for lost time we could of had if we where smarter. It was slow and sensual. His finger tips ended up in my hair as we pulled away.

“I’m infatuated with you.” He grins and I smile wide.

#Spotify #alex turner #alex turner x reader #arctic monkeys #alex turner fluff #alex turner angst

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da-proti-toku-grem · 1 month

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*breaks down door* DELIVERY BELONGING 2 ONE JURE N JAN LOVING GIRLY/gn N WONDERFUL WRITER CALLED MACA!! :DD

*🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁🥁*

(Jan/Jure! beach date cuz I miss summer N im running out of ideas 4 the perfect date series + my brain is FRIED from working on moodboards N homeschool stuff all day so there’s no tale 2 be told this time srry 😭) BUT I do feel like putting my friends out of their misery with how much they listen 2 me yapping about our silly pretty lil Slovenians N since were all batshit insane over them here maybe rambling 2 U isn’t a bad idea (U don’t gotta read if It gets super long :3) Jure was my original bby when I first found them almost a whole year ago on my birthday,him N Bojan were the ones that caught my attention when they came on N made me drop a perfectly good slice of leftover birthday cake on the carpet N blush like crazy ☺️.Then once I was pretty familiar with the band I started becoming a Jan girly/gn aswell which started my love 4 the two as a pairing (all the nights I scrolled Pinterest 4 photos of them together N binged a bunch of vids still keep me up 😵‍💫) cuz their so PRETTY N GORGEOUS N SWEET N ADORABLE N SILLY N mmmmmmmhhhhhhhhh *melts into a vaguely Gengar plushie shaped puddle* all the gig footage we’ve been getting has made me fall even harder 4 them both (I’m the reason all those Joker Out edit complications have so many f4n views) but in a way they saved me,not just them but mostly them ykyk b4 I was being homeschooled the one I went 2 was shit N I would always head straight 2 tumblr so I could see my boys once I got home,watching the Carpe diem series N welcome to the backstage eps over N over again cuz just seeing my darlings smile made me giggle N kick my feet N twirl my hair (how could I not when they look like THAT *grabby hands*) I can’t remember how many times I’ve questioned my sexuality over them N the whole band until I finally realised my ass doesn’t just like girls N I’ll always be glad I found them N this crazy lil fandom when I did cuz this place is like a famliy N their our home,4 whoever long we got with them N maybe even forever <33333

Hey!! (About the text) Yeah I totally get you, they were totally what saved me at the end of my last year of high school last year. I discovered them when the stress was starting to become too much and they helped me a lot to keep going. And then when I started uni I felt like shit every day (that's why I ended up dropping out - bc: 1. I didn't like what I was doing, and 2. My mental health was is shit rn and I prefer to focus on that) and the only thing that kept me from going absolutely insane was going on tumblr and talk/see people talking about these silly little slovenian men so... yeah :) this fandom truly feels like home to me too <33

(About the moodboard) I absolutely LOVE IT!!!!!! Like, I saw this yesterday at night when you sent the ask and I loved the idea so much that I ended up writing a little fic 🤭 I was waiting until I finished writing to post the ask and the fic at the same time, but I finished at 2am (oops 😅), so I'm queueing both for the morning :3 🩷

#i'll update with the link as soon as it's posted hehe #take it as a gift for you given that you always send me all these beautiful moodboards :) <33 #joker out #jan peteh #jure maček #jan/jure #the two kitties of joker out <3 #moodboard #ask #mine #maca speaks #q

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ninjahiccups · 1 year

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The Songbird of Asgard

Chapter 6: Fond

AO3 link OC Insert version Previous Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 Word Count: 6.5k Warnings: None, other than it becoming clear that I hc Heimdall as demi okay byyyeeee

-------------------------------------------------------------------------- Blurb: Your next task is to accompany Heimdall to Svartalfheim to have the dwarves repair the relic recovered on your most recent search. You end up working, Heimdall ends up with an internal struggle until it hits him. --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Double posting because this ended up too long again. I'm actually not happy with how these next two chapters came out, buuuuuuutt it's been too long, so I'm moving on lol

Heimdall's legs carried him up the familiar hill, to the place he spent far too much time at now.

You weren't singing yet, your lyre was the only music coming from your spot. You caught sight of him and smiled warmly. He could feel how relieved you were that he chose to stop by after your last conversation, worried that you may have overstepped. Which you did, but Heimdall didn't feel the need to complain.

You closed the notebook in your lap, taking your eyes away from him for just a moment. When they rose once more, you found Heimdall sitting next to you, instead of in his usual seat across the fire pit. You did your best to contain your surprise from him, and to ignore the spark of warmth his proximity brought. It was strange to you; so far Heimdall had avoided you for days after you said or did something that challenged his way of thinking. This was the only time he ever moved on without delay. A part of you hoped that maybe, just maybe, you were starting to ease the stubborn distrust and distaste that kept him at arm's length from everyone. Now if only you could curb that arrogance of his, but that was a completely different hurdle.

"Finished a bit late today, did you?" You asked, switching to a tune he liked. He never said which songs he liked, but you had learned which ones eased his stress after so many visits.

Heimdall scoffed, resting his elbows on his knees. "You can thank Baldur for that. The imbecile hurled himself off the wall to win a bet and I had to scrape his ragged 'corpse' off the ground."

You chuckled, "Yeah, that sounds like him." He had a reputation for doing reckless and insane things for the smallest reasons. It was sad, watching him do terrible things to himself just for the off chance that he would feel something. Whenever you breached the topic with him he shut down and refused to address it. He clearly didn't want to share his thoughts on the matter.

Your companion said nothing as the lyre strings filled the air with calming notes, lulling you both into your own little reverie that no one else could disturb.

Heimdall was doing it again. He was accepting your company.

He didn't care, he decided.

Yes, that was his decision. He didn't sleep for a second the night before, after he dropped you off at home, pondering exactly what he was doing. Finding a "friend," devoting time to them for absolutely no reason other than he felt like it. It was so absurd, yet he kept doing it over and over again, and each time he did it became less absurd. He was coming around to the idea of…just spending time with you.

Was that so bad?

His duties still came first, and that was something he would never forget. That idea was ultimately what convinced him that he should have no quarrel with his wanton choice to indulge himself in your presence. He was the watchman, first and foremost. His purpose was to serve Odin by protecting the realm that rose above all others. Even so, he had some time to himself, and what was the difference between spending it alone and spending it with someone who kept him on his toes? In the end, this was the most productive and enjoyable way to use his free moments.

He could do whatever he wanted, so long as his work came first.

His mind wandered, this time to his earlier emotions rather than his thoughts. A rare act for him.

After you left him alone he paced around atop Gulltoppr for at least a couple hours. Regardless of how much he chastised himself for slipping, for letting himself fall prey to useless relationships that served him no purpose, he was still left with a lingering satisfaction. It was something he hadn't experienced before, at least not because of another person. He had similar feelings when he was reading, looking over Asgard’s plains from the wall, returning home after a day of hard and meaningful work. It wasn't quite the same, though. It was more potent, but just as comforting.

What was that?

"What are you doing?"

Heimdall's question was left unanswered. He returned to the present and glanced at you, keeping his eyes forward. "Does it look like I'm doing anything?"

"No, but you certainly are. The pensive look on your face tells me that." It was merely a fact, said with no taunting or mischief. You really had gotten to know him, hadn't you? Somehow he didn't mind.

"Just thinking," he replied.

"Thinking?" Your hand flies to your mouth in mock surprise. "That can't be, you never do that!" You had to hold in an impish cackle when he sat up straight just to send you his nastiest sneer.

Heimdall boasted, "If I recall correctly there have been plenty of occasions where I've done more thinking than you."

"Not really, you just let the foresight think for you, and that's not the same."

His teeth clenched in annoyance. Odin had said similar things before, so he couldn't in good conscience refute that. "Do you have to be this insufferable?"

A giggle. "I'm just wondering if you might have learned something last night, hmm?"

He wasn't willing to admit that he did. Something that would be invaluable if it weren't so risky. At the sinking feeling in his stomach he found that he just would rather not tell you that your efforts were in vain. "Yes. That you’re the worst," he settled on.

"Oh, come on. You mean you weren't thinking that you should try that more often? To…see beyond your foresight?"

Again, a glare. This one incredulous.

"Okay, yeah. That was a terrible line, but my point still stands."

Heimdall rolled his eyes. You were still so adamant that his foresight was a hindrance. "My foresight sees plenty."

He felt the shift. Subtle, and hidden from the surface, but he picked up on it. Disappointment. You may have presented the subject as a jest but you were really hoping he saw value in "turning off" his foresight when it was overwhelming. "Aaaaaand you missed the point. Even though it was right there." Your hand gestured to the empty fire pit in front of you, plopping back into your lap sluggishly.

Before he could help it he felt the discomfort creeping into his chest. Gods, why did he react so strongly? It was so much that he dropped the confidence just long enough to be sincere for a moment. "I'll use it again if I need it," he replied softly. He hated how weak it sounded, but the flood of appreciation and the loss of your discontent overpowered it quickly.

You smiled, much more at ease. "Good. I'm glad it helped."

Said with care. Genuine, selfless concern for another, even after they hardly showed gratitude for it. It was still mind boggling how foreign it was. Not in a negative way, for once in his life. While that thought was in his mind he felt something else from you. Fondness. For him.

It made him speak without forethought. "Thank you."

Heimdall almost jumped at the choking stutter you spat out, looking like the wind had nearly blown you off the bench. "Excuse me?!"

Heimdall rolled his eyes and sighed, giving no indication that he was just as thrown off. "You can never again call me dramatic after that reaction."

You held back laughter while you babbled back, "I-I have never heard you say that before! I can't even tell if you're serious!"

"I never lie, you know that." Again, said without a thought behind it. Damn his impulsive tongue.

You looked down, smiling brightly to yourself. This was it, you thought. This was what it was all for. These little instances where there was no need for him to look at every detail with such a critical and condescending eye. All it took was kindness that he could never find. It almost felt like an honor to have torn down his barriers enough to make it so. "Wow, Heimdall. Now I'm really starting to think you like me."

He couldn't help but snicker. As foolish as the statement was, it made something stir in him. The same thing he'd been battling since last night.

It was something he'd had enough of for the time being. "So, you're trying to hide things from me now?" He questioned while pointing to your notebook, changing the subject before he could get lost in his head again.

You pursed your lips at the book. "No, I'm just not sure about this song."

"The piece you were playing? I haven't heard that one yet. Was it something you heard and you're not sure if you're good enough to recreate it?

"No, smartass. It's one I wrote."

Heimdall's brows raised. "Another?"

"Yes, I've written a bunch. This one is…" you trailed off, not sure how to describe it. "I don't know, it's just different."

He couldn't help the curiosity after that. "Then put it up to the ultimate test. Let me hear it. If I don't like it then you know it's terrible." Said like a haughty lord who was reluctantly listening to the gripes of peasants.

You scoffed at him. Nonetheless you complied, adjusting your grip on the lyre and bringing out the melody.

You were right, this one was different. Not as serene and quiet, but more mysterious. Something that would fit nicely with getting confused by one's own mind and wondering where their head was going. Even so, it was still a relaxing piece, just more…hypnotizing.

Your voice joined in. The lyrics were the jumbled mess of nonsense they usually were, but still added that extra level of beauty that no other had matched. He refused to say as much, but your knack for making every song you played into something magical was quite impressive, even to him.

The short excerpt stopped. "I don't know, it's not what I usually do. What do you think?"

Heimdall chuckled, so light that you almost missed it. The songs you always played never got old, and now you would have even more at your disposal? He was suddenly giddy, so pleased that you would keep him on the edge of his seat in the most calming way possible. You were truly a gifted musician. "Turning out to be quite the songbird, aren't you?" he mused.

You saw the smile he wore, how soft it was paired with the admiration in his sparkling eyes. It left you incapable of maintaining eye contact. Your music helped him relax, that much you knew. It was seeing proof of just how much he enjoyed it that made you want to pick the lyre back up and sing again, just for him. You desperately needed to see this pleased grin more often. Your eyes returned to his as you muttered, "I like that a lot more than 'stray.'"

He agreed. A much more suitable title for you.

Bird's wings and a squawk sounded, breaking the content isolation. Huginn landed on the bench across the fire pit.

Heimdall shoved the moment aside. Duty called, and it was well established how much more important that was. "Back to work, then."

You stood with him, a bit disappointed that he moved on so quickly, but you couldn't blame him. Neither of you could keep Odin waiting. Holding your lyre and notebook up to the raven, you requested, "Huginn, do you mind helping me drop these off at home before I report to All-Father?"

The bird stared at you for a moment, almost like it was insulted that you asked. It cawed again in half-hearted agreement.

"I'll meet you there," you said to Heimdall.

"You certainly will."

He wasn't sure why he felt compelled to confirm it. Or say anything at all.

Heimdall waited in Odin's study until you made your entrance, stepping up to his desk while Huginn landed on his usual perch. Odin was still looking down at the papers on his desk, ignoring all others for a few more moments. You took a second to glance at Heimdall and gave him a smile, one that he returned eagerly.

An exasperated squawk rang through the study loud enough for Odin to acknowledge the raven. "What, Huginn?" He sighed, sounding every bit like an exhausted parent. Once the bird spoke again the All-Father looked between the two younger gods awaiting his orders, seeming suspicious. He then waved a dismissive hand at his pet. "Later." He didn’t elaborate on exactly what the bird was trying to say, moving on from its offended chirps without a second thought.

"No spelunking or combat today, you two." He retrieved the cracked orb you found in Niflheim from a bookshelf behind him. "I've been experimenting with this piece here and it can definitely be fixed. All it'll take is some materials and bifrost." The old god opened one of the drawers in his desk, pulling out a pebble of silver metal and holding it out to you.

You took it, brow furrowed with bemusement. "It seems like ordinary metal. How is this going to repair it?"

"It's ordinary metal for now. But thanks to my investigating…" A wrinkled finger pressed down onto the ore in your palm, blue and pink light of bifrost seeping out from the point of contact. Both you and Heimdall could feel the magic being transferred from Odin and into the metal, remaining once his hand withdrew. For a moment you practically held a physical manifestation of bifrost between your fingers until the energy escaped and dissipated before your eyes.

"I discovered that certain ores can contain and blend with bifrost if handled correctly. It all depends on the metal, which I'm certain our friends in Svartalfheim will be able to figure out right away. You'll be going there, asking them for the appropriate material, and using bifrost to seal them together." He nodded to Heimdall, "Which you'll be doing as soon as they get what you need. I'd rather you take care of it there than take several trips back to Asgard until we find something that works."

Heimdall bowed with no hesitation. "An excellent plan, All-Father."

You, however, returned the metal to Odin's desk with a frown. "With all due respect, All-Father, why do you need me to go? It sounds like Heimdall can take care of this himself."

For whatever reason Heimdall felt a mixture of pride at your recognition of his abilities and dejected that you were risking not going with him.

"A couple reasons. Main thing is insurance. If at any point you feel the binding magic within this sphere become unstable, stop the process immediately and return to me. And…" he glanced at Heimdall. "You're popular around here. The dwarves should be happy to help if you take the lead." An insinuation that Heimdall was feared in Svartalfheim. Based on the rebellion Sif had mentioned once, that made sense.

Odin wrapped the core of the artifact in cloth and handed it to you. "No dallying, we're too close to bringing this tool back from destruction to start now."

Huginn enclosed you in the vortex of ravens. With Odin gone, you wasted no time. "Can I expect you to behave yourself while I do all the talking?"

Heimdall rolled his eyes. "Can I expect you to pay attention and not get swept up in the mundane sight of Nidavellir?"

A shrug. "Looks like we'll both be let down." You had learned how to handle Heimdall quite well. This may have been the first time you'd get to look around a new realm even if he was with you for it.

When the ravens parted, Huginn flew off to a high branch. Where exactly, you didn’t bother to follow. Your sight remained on the mountain in front of you, intricate patterns and scenes carefully carved into the surface. Paths leading to outcrops littered the mountainside, all skillfully crafted by the dwarves. Even with the bustling industry the tropical nature of the realm still made itself known, framing the mountain and every hut, workbench, and shop with lush green trees. It was such a far cry from the dust bowls and closely chaperoned gardens of Alfheim, or the flat greenery of Gladsheim that you had grown so accustomed to. The smell of burning coal burned your nose and the clunking of heavy machinery brought life to the air. The warm sunlight filtered through the winding leaves above the round square that you were dropped in the middle of, turning the light into a welcoming yellow-green. You spun around as you took in the sights. Everything was so new, even if a lot of it was artificial.

Heimdall watched you with amusement as he strode towards the largest workstation at the edge of the square. "Don't get too distracted, now. We have work to do."

You were not dissuaded by him. "Oh, come on. This is probably the most pleasing sight we've gotten since we started looking for this relic."

A fair point, he said to himself while a dwarf in a white shirt and stained apron scurried to him. "L-Lord Heimdall! We've been expecting you," he greeted nervously, his brown cap almost sliding off his head when he bowed too quickly.

Your fascination with the environment had to be cut short. Heimdall had been there for a meager minute and he was already about to push his metaphorical weight around. You returned to his side just as Heimdall, while brushing stray ash from his tunic, drawled, "I am aware. Yet I don't see anything that we need. What is your excuse—"

You leaned down a bit to look at the dwarf that was only about two-thirds your height. "All-Father may not have been specific enough for you to supply us right away. Let me apologize for that by explaining what we need," you interrupted with an air of professionalism. The dwarf was blatantly confused by it, his eyes flicking between you and Heimdall like he only had seconds to memorize your appearances before you vanished. You weren't sure if he was more surprised that you had the bravery to interrupt Heimdall or that Heimdall let you interrupt him.

The dwarf adjusted the thin monocle framing the bridge of his wide nose as if he needed to get a better look at you. "And you are, my lady?"

You gave him your name, then continued, "I promise I'm much more personable than my associate here." Your smile was sincere, though Heimdall was irked at the milquetoast insult directed at him. "And what is your name?"

"Oh…I am Halvar, the overseer of this establishment where we sort, distribute, and store the assets that All-Father requests." Despite the condescending sneer Heimdall was giving the dwarf, Halvar relaxed at the gentle sound of your voice. "It is a pleasure to meet you, my lady. What was it that you needed?"

You held out the blue sphere for Halvar to examine, keeping close enough to yourself to communicate that he did not have permission to handle it. "We are looking for an ore that can mend this relic without compromising its abilities. It needs to be capable of holding bifrost, which Heimdall will use to combine them."

Halvar stroked his chin in thought. "I see…that is quite an exotic order. Receptive to magic, soft enough to be malleable, has a low melting point…I have some ideas, but we may need to run some tests to narrow down our options."

Heimdall growled back, "You're the overseer, yet you do not even know which of your stock would work? Are you sure you're qualified for this?"

The dwarf shuddered at the implication that Odin would hear about his shortcomings. "N-no! I mean, I know enough about the ores we have, it-it's just—"

"Ignore him," You intervened again before looking over at Heimdall and muttering, "Heimdall, shut up." The god scoffed at you while you reassured Halvar that you had faith in his knowledge. Among the fear that made a home in Halvar's mind, Heimdall could feel a miniscule hint of shock.

Halvar, much calmer with your comfort, said, "Well, we have plenty to see inside the storeroom. If you follow me I can escort you."

"If you wouldn't mind."

"Why, of course!" Halvar replied a bit too enthusiastically. "I'm happy to be of service, m'lady."

Heimdall almost sighed, seeing the same eagerness to follow your every whim that the servants in Asgard had, solely because you chose to spare them of the treatment befitting their status. As pathetic as ever.

Halvar lead you towards the ginormous circular door into the mountain down the path from the square, moving fast enough that he wouldn't hear Heimdall lean over to you and whisper, "A few soft words and he's like a loyal dog," with an unimpressed glare boring into the dwarf's back.

"Oh really? It's almost like being nice to people makes them like you, huh? Maybe you should try it." He only replied with a mocking exclamation of shock, making you chuckle. The dwarven workers around you stared, wondering why the cruel Heimdall they feared so much had seemed to be fine with the sass.

You were stopped in front of the door that was well over ten times taller than Thor. Halvar signaled his crew to open the gate, the anxiety returning when he turned to Heimdall and said, "It will take just a moment to open."

He was right to hesitate. The statement was enough for Heimdall to complain about, which was unsurprising to you. "You knew we were coming. Why would you not have it open already? All you're doing is wasting our time."

Halvar had an explanation — the wildlife could get antsy in the area and it was not ideal to have them exploring around Odin's preferred merchandise — but you gave him no chance. "Honestly, Heimdall, I don't get why you're so upset about a door."

"It isn't the door, obviously!" He lectured. The dwarves nearby noticed the lack of anger and insults. "It's the principle of the matter."

You sarcastically parroted, "'It's the principle,' he says."

"Yes, the principle! All-Father gave them ample warning of our arrival and it is not a surprise that we wouldn't find what we need in one of the dilapidated, second-rate shops outside of Nidavellir. Saving the trouble of waiting would have been respectful of our time."

You weren't really listening to his rant, knowing his impatience was not justifiable. "It seems to me that your 'principles' are stupid."

Heimdall sighed in annoyance, not bothering to change your mind. When he looked away he caught a few dwarves staring at you in dismay. He shot them a warning glare, silently commanding them not to eavesdrop. They practically tripped over each other trying to leave his line of sight.

The gates finally opened and the rumbling cogs and bolts were silenced. Halvar waved you inside the torchlit tunnel into the mountain. It opened into a huge room with a hole dug out of the roof to let the sunlight into. The branching paths were so numerous that it was overwhelming, leaving you wondering how anyone could keep track of where everything went. Some tunnels held tracks for metal carts that were connected to the plentiful mines within the mountain, others went to rooms that held crates and barrels, tools and safety gear, and spare parts for maintenance. The view from the entrance was so vast that you couldn't see the other end, the darkness of the cave swallowing up anything that wasn't directly under the skylight. Your eyes ventured up to see stairs and ladders going into higher rooms, several stories of them. It was a wonder that the dwarves working there didn't get lost in all the caverns they had to traverse while manning the storeroom.

"This is incredible!" You exclaimed, twirling around to find every detail and tuck it away in your memory. "How is something this massive made in the first place?"

Halvar continued through the dark portion of the entrance and toward the sunlight, grinning at your enthusiasm. "Ah, that's quite a story, my lady. My forefathers were the founders of these caves, drawn here by the rich—"

"How interesting," Heimdall droned, reminding Halvar that this was not a tour.

Halvar shrunk away from him. "Oh, yes, of course, my lord."

You shot Heimdall an irritated glower, moving to lightly slap his shoulder. He dodged it, of course. "Pretend he isn't even here, Halvar. We don't need him yet."

Heimdall showed how appalling the statement was with his expression, prompting you to smirk while you followed Halvar towards the sunlight. From his right he could feel the confusion of other dwarves, locating the source. An entire group of them had stopped to gape at him, all wondering the same thing.

How did you get away with that?

Heimdal asked himself that, snarling at the dwarves to remind them that he did not suffer fools lightly. Worse yet was that he was more angry at them for doubting his prowess than he was at you for giving them a reason to. He wasn't mad at you at all, actually, despite the annoyance being your fault. Maybe if you were still in Asgard, alone and far from others, he wouldn't care. But this was business, and your friendship was nothing compared to his duty to Odin. Bringing whatever antics you used to kill time was not to be tolerated.

He ignored the feeling of other dwarves questioning him while he stalked over to you. He stopped short, the sight stunning him.

The skylight. You were beneath it now, having followed Halvar while he recounted the founding of the storeroom. The warm colored light landed gracefully on your hair, illuminating the strands and gracing them with a golden halo. Your eyes, ever brilliant, shined even brighter with the light illuminating your curious gaze. The smile you wore was full of life and joy, the manifestation of the gentle and kind soul underneath. He could have sworn you were glowing in this setting.

You really are a beautiful woman.

Wait.

Heimdall shook his head and grit his teeth. No distractions, not while he was in the process of completing a very important task for the All-Father.

Halvar finished his tale and directed the two gods down a specific tunnel, with you gleefully following him. Heimdall caught up to you, intent on voicing his disdain for your casual behavior at such an inappropriate time. As soon as he was next to you and your eyes landed on him, all the frustration melted, and he couldn't control himself before he smirked at you lightheartedly. "Need I remind you that we are here on business?"

"Heimdall," you pleaded, slightly exasperated, "this may be the only time we don't have to traipse through snow or fight off ogres while we work. Don't you want to have at least a little fun?"

"Your 'fun' isn't welcome right now." He regretted the harsh tone as soon as he saw the hurt pass through you. "I much prefer keeping it elsewhere," he added quickly.

You paused, contemplating that statement, then nodded. "Alright, if you insist." You sounded too smug to him. Underneath that joking facade, he read something else. You were flattered, it seemed. Like you didn't mind that your friendly habits remained between you two.

He didn't feel the need to discourage it.

Heimdall intended to be stern and domineering, determined to criticize you whenever you were too friendly. It was just his thoughts that were a problem. They were so intrusive then, words and ideas popping into his head before he could regulate them. All of them had to do with you. Every single one.

He'd grown quiet as Halvar presented different metals to you and let you test magic on them, keeping his distance at times. He just looked at you, and it was when something made his gaze loiter for too long that the rogue thoughts would occur. When you were standing before a mine cart full of stones that glowed blue, he watched you, in awe of how the light danced across your features. Later on Halvar brought them to a forge to melt a piece of ore that you considered a worthy candidate. The heat rushed out of the furnace he opened, the hot air blowing back your tresses and making them flutter in the breeze. He watched every strand flit across your face. After that metal was deemed inappropriate for your purpose, Halvar guided you to a crate of a rare resource, freshly mined and still covered in soot. Heimdall tracked your fingers poking at the metals, staining your fingers with black dust. You wiped them off on your waist, and Heimdall's eyes were trapped in that spot, admiring your frame and the curve of your back until you walked away.

He watched you go until Huginn cawed at him. The insolent bird had been staying closer than usual.

No matter how much he forced himself to focus and stay alert he kept drifting back to you, telling himself how gorgeous you were in the torchlight, or how sweet your voice was, or noticing how soft your skin looked, or how enticing your laughter was…

You had found a potential ore to use, one that passed all other tests and shouldn't interfere with the complex binding spell the relic created. All you needed was for Heimdall to see how it reacted to bifrost. "Heimdall," you called without taking your eyes away from the ore. "Can you test this out for me?"

Heimdall was too lost in thought, examining the gorgeous proportions of your profile.

"Heimdall?"

The second attempt shook him out of his mind. Your amused smirk was the first thing he registered. "Not even paying attention, are we?"

He didn't answer. He didn't want to, still wondering why he was so distracted.

The ore passed the bifrost test, and you deemed it would react well to the existing magic. He took the lump of ore in his hand, a rainbow glow emanating through his fingers. When he opened his hand the once black stone was a mass of swirling blues and pinks. Halvar was excited by the new idea, despite the fact that he knew Odin wouldn't give them any time to explore it. The dwarf bounced off to the forge to melt the ore and mend the crack in the relic.

"You've been quiet," you said once you were ignored by any surrounding dwarves. "Something on your mind?"

Heimdall shrugged, pretending that he didn't have the slightest clue what you were talking about. "I can't say any of this has managed to keep me entertained."

"Oh really? You seemed much more interested earlier, when you were whining."

"I do not whine."

"It sounded like whining to me."

Heimdall taunted back, "You have no right considering how much you whined when I wouldn't let you pet Gulltoppr after I dropped you off last night."

You harrumphed, "That's different. You were just being a jerk."

Heimdall laughed in triumph. The sound brought a wave of confusion through the bystanders. Every single dwarf within earshot was aghast that Heimdall showed not an ounce of viciousness or annoyance, and even looked content. He promptly reminded them who he was with a single scowl that sent them running.

Once again his mind went on a tangent fueled by you. His eyes went to your ear, where the gold cuff decorated the cartilage. He remembered the first time he saw it. He liked it, and considered taking it if he was given permission to kill you. This time he didn't consider having it for himself, or think about how it matched his picky taste in trinkets. All he could think was how nice it looked on you, how it brought out the highlighted strands among the hair around it.

His thoughts were interrupted by the gradual build up of anxiety coming from you, evident by your fingers fidgeting with your sleeves. "Is there any particular reason you're staring at me?"

"I'm not." Technically true, he was looking at your jewelry specifically, not your person.

You sighed. "I've mentioned this before, Heimdall. Your eyes glow. It's hard to miss."

Heimdall replied by rolling his eyes, using that to indicate that his denial stood strong. The nervous tension in you remained.

"Are you angry with me?" Said in a whisper so that no one but him would hear.

Heimdall almost scoffed. "Have I ever had a problem with voicing my anger in the past?"

A shrug. "No…but you don't always have such an intense look on your face, which makes me think you're upset."

He had no idea how to explain himself while hiding the fact that he didn't really have a reason.

"If it's because I'm being too chummy in public, I can stop."

Stop? Stop doing the things you always did? Go back to that quiet, meek form of yourself that held back the flame he found so amusing? The idea itself felt like blasphemy. "Don't," he choked out, biting his cheek afterward. He still couldn't figure out how you managed to loosen his tongue.

A glimmer of hope peeked through the fear in you. "You aren't mad then?"

It was then it clicked. You weren't scared that he was angry. You were afraid that he was ashamed of your friendship. It made sense. He'd made it abundantly clear to everyone in the realms that the only part of him they'd see would only be his fiercest front, and no less. No one should forget his deadly skills, his lack of hesitation when it came to expressing his power. That was exactly why he chose to remain professional with you when he was called to action. Hearing that it made you think he was ashamed, though…He didn't like it. There were so many people he was ashamed of associating with. Thor, his sons, the mortal inhabitants in Gladsheim, the idiotic einherjar that were just barely smart enough to take orders, dwarves that he intimidated on Odin's behalf…but not you. You were the last person he would be ashamed of. The only person he could do more than tolerate, the reason this entire trip to Svartalfheim hadn't been a complete drag that drove him to the brink of unreasonable violence. If you thought he was ashamed, then there would only be one place — your little hideaway in Asgard — where you would continue to be yourself and show that fiery temperament of yours.

The iron will to remain professional he had forged began to bend and crumple. "I'm not upset," he said after a few moments, struggling to sound as neutral as possible.

Even the indifferent sounding confirmation was enough, banishing the fear that you had crossed a line and broken his trust. "Really? Hmm…you definitely would have been if this was happening months ago."

The mischief he heard convinced him that abandoning his decision was worth it. There you were: the one that made things so much more lively. Why did he want to push you away again? Really, it was much more worthwhile to punish anyone who was foolish enough to think he was any less of a god when your friendship showed. Why punish himself for it?

His duties still came first, of course. But the opinions of anyone that wasn't Odin? Well, he never cared in the first place, and why would he start now?

He covered his rapid withdrawal with a confident smirk. "Well, we are still forced to tolerate each other. I've chosen to spare you my wrath for the time being."

You felt your stomach flip, knowing his words were more cryptic than they seemed. "To my understanding, you just said that you really have started to like me."

"The stupid language thing again," he mumbled under his breath. "You're wrong, actually, I despise you entirely."

You laughed, the wonderful sound like little bells. "Don't worry, I despise you too." Implying that you were speaking his "language," obviously. He chuckled at how ridiculous it sounded coming from you.

The conversation would sensibly end there, but Heimdall felt the urge to say a few more things — things he fought the urge to say. He wanted to emphasize that his declared hatred for you was sarcasm despite that you clearly knew it. He just hated the idea of you thinking there was even an ounce of truth to it, that his hatred for you hadn't long since passed and been replaced by…this. Whatever this was.

You snickered again, making him realize he had started gawking at you again, this time in plain view. "That reminds me. If you aren't angry, then what is it?"

He didn't know. He couldn't consider it either. The forge Halvar was working on grew brighter with rising flames. Their light highlighted your eyes and accentuated the forms of your face, all while warming your skin and adding color to the hair he was more and more tempted to reach out and touch.

All he could do was look at you. In that moment you were so, so breathtaking. It was the first time he'd ever been so entranced by someone.

You're beautiful. He wanted to say. He fought it. So what? When did appearances ever matter? Why did he feel the need to say something so foolish and worthless?

Something inside him had the answer: it wasn't your appearance that made you beautiful.

He lost the battle. His mouth opened. The phrase was working its way through his tongue.

A hardy guffaw broke the scene. Halvar returned with the orb, hooting and hollering about his handiwork. "Lookie here! It's like it was never broken in the first place!" He held it out for you to see, much more inclined to show you rather than Heimdall. There was no exaggeration in his declaration, however. The sphere was as good as new, and there was no sign it was any less functional than before. If anything it felt more stable now that the magic was properly contained.

"That's amazing!" You cheered, asking how he managed such a feat on an object as delicate as that artifact.

Heimdall tuned out. There was one persistent thought in his mind, and it was taking all of his strength to drown it.

He established that he liked you the night before, and he accepted as much. Now it was starting to sink in.

He didn't like you. He was fond of you. Very fond of you.

Huginn's black eyes never left him.

#Heimdall #heimdall god of war #gow heimdall #heimdall x reader #songbird of asgard #Heimdall finally says the thing (tm)#god of war

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kiyothequotequeen · 27 days

Text

Playing Dangerous (Smoker x Reader)

This is originally from my Wattpad but that's pretty dead so here we go! (more parts coming in the future)

(Modern au also Smokers name in this will be Smoker[first] White[middle] Chase[last])

I sit outside in my nightgown holding a rescue blanket in my lap as I stare to the side where my house still manages to stand. The light from my house has attracted almost anyone in the neighborhood with all of them talking about if everyone's safe and all that. I see firemen all around trying to put the fire out and around 4 or 5 police cars with one or two ambulances and a firetruck just sitting there while firefighters make sure there's no one left in my home. "Ma'am? Can you come with me please?" I look up, startled by the deep voice, and when I do my face is immediately dusted with a light blush that can't be seen in the lighting of the fire. I stand up slowly, letting go of the rescue blanket as I nod and begin to follow this police officer. I notice he has slicked back yet messy white hair and a harsh look on his face. His muscles are insanely visible through his shirt which makes me wonder if his precinct even allows that or if he just doesn't care. When he stops walking I almost bump into him since it was so sudden. I look over and realize he's brought me to a police car. He starts asking me questions related to the fire and after a few he asks if I started the fire. I stare at him a bit shocked he could even ask me something like that but I gain my composure quickly. "No, I would never do a thing like that." I look down at the ground and when I do, I realize I'm still in my night gown which is a little burnt on the hem but not too bad. It's a nightgown cut to my mid thigh with a deep v cut neck and thin straps holding it all together. I blush a little bit and look back up at the officer seeing him right stuff down like he's been doing this whole time. I bring my hand up to my face and begin to bite my nail.

"Are you okay?" My e/c iris' meet his hazel ones as i stop biting my nail and stare for a moment before answering. "Well, I'm a little shaken, but I'm fine, thanks for asking." I cross my arms shaking from the cold. "I wish I hadn't gotten rid of the rescue blanket though." I chuckle lightly as I continue to shake. He seems to be thinking for a moment before speaking. "I could go back and get it... though they've probably already taken it if you're not there anymore." He stares at me with his tough look and I swear for a second i saw him look me up and down. "Would you like to sit in my car?" He seemed fine with asking that, if anything, like he would've told me to get in anyway but he demeanor seemed nervous. I stand shaking for a moment before nodding my head quickly. "Yeah, that would be nice."

When he opens the door he holds out his hand and I stare for a moment, confused, before taking it as he gently leads me to the door before letting go. In the few seconds our hands were touching, I could feel how course and rough his hands felt compared to my smaller ones. If my house weren't currently on fire I'd totally be hitting on this guy but it's kinda hard to focus on that when you can feel the heat from 3 houses away. I stare at my burning house again and this time the firefighters are finally spraying hoses at it. I shift my gaze a bit and see the police officer standing by the car next to my legs with his arm resting on the roof of the car as he also stares at my house. "What are your plans for shelter?" He turns his head towards me as I think. "Well I didn't really expect my house to burn down so I don't have a plan yet. Or a phone, dammit." I finally realize I left my phone in the house so now I have no way to call someone.

"Here." I look up to see him handing me his phone ready to dial a number. "Thank you," I mumble out as I take the phone from his hand and think of who to call in this situation. Soon I start dialing a number and when I call I pray the other person is awake. I wait and wait and wait awkwardly as I wait for someone to answer the phone until on the last ring I hear someone pick up. "Um hi mom," I'm a little annoyed she took so long to answer but it's probably not her fault.

"Oh hi sweetie! I was just getting ready to go to bed. What's up?" I nod my head as she talks and feel a little bad I called her right as she was getting ready to sleep."

"I'm sorry mom, but I'm calling because my house like kind of burned down..." I look down at my hand on my lap as I speak.

"Oh my God! Are you okay? What happened?"

"Ye- Yes mom, I'm fine, I got out in time and so did Poseidon, I'm just not sure where he is..."

"I'm not worried about your cat honey. Do you need me to come get you?" For some reason I start to choke up as my eyes become glossy and I continue to stare down.

"Please come get me mom, I don't have anywhere to stay," I choke out as tears begin to fall down my face and I cover my face with the back of my hand.

"Okay sweetie I'm heading out the door right now, I'll be there soon!" I nod and hang up and hand the officer his phone back as I continue to look down and cry quietly. He takes his phone while staying quiet.

All I can think about after that phone call is how my home is really gone. I'd lived in that house for a few years and it was the first house I paid for all on my own. I raised and fostered cats in that house and I had my own which I don't even know where he is right now. Photos of cherished memories and all my furniture and all my decorations gone. I hope somethings still salvageable by the time I come back. I sit there and wipe my face as I stand up abruptly, startling the officer. I stare at him for a moment before looking down at his badge and then back up at his face. "My mom will be here to pick me up soon so I'm going to look for my cat before she gets here. Thank you for everything officer..." I cut myself off realizing I never learned his name so I wait for him to finish my sentence with it. "Officer Chase." I smile up at him before nodding and getting a nod back before walking off to God knows where. I just started calling for my cat hoping he'd come back to me eventually. "Poseidon..." I called out one last time before I stopped walking and just stood there. I began to tear up thinking I may not find my cat tonight or maybe even ever again. I turned around and saw a small light from far off. "Tch, they still haven't put out the fire..." I turned back around and when I did I covered my eyes by the bright car lights passing by before the car halted. Mom. She always had her brights on no matter how many times I told her to turn them off.

She ran out of the car and up to me on the sidewalk and she grabbed my hands before I could even say anything. "Y/N are you okay? You sure you're not hurt?" She's always so worried about me and I grew up to appreciate her concern unlike when I was young. I nodded my head and took my hands out of hers and wrapped my arms around her, embracing her in a tight yet comforting hug. I let a few tears fall as I hugged her and she wrapped her arms around me just as quick. We stood there for a moment before a car honked behind my moms and we realized we should get in so we don't cause traffic in a neighborhood. We waved at the other car, apologizing before quickly getting in and driving off.

"Thank you for picking me up mom," my voice was quiet, barely above a whisper as I started out the window. She placed one of her hands on mine and squeezed it lightly before speaking. "Anytime sweetheart. I'm so sorry this happened to you."

"It's not your fault. I just wanna lay down and sleep." I sighed out and leaned my head on the window as she took her hand off of mine after giving it another squeeze and said 'I know' and turned the radio on.

I continued to stare out the window almost dozing off while thinking about my house, my cat, and for some odd reason, the officer I met that day. I couldn't seem to shake him from my mind for too long.

Officer Chase...

OH MY GOD THIS SINGLE CHAPTER TOOK LIKE 2 MONTHS TO WRITE HELPPPPP. Anyways so glad it's done I hope you enjoy it cause I wanna make more chapters and if you guys interact with this story it would really help motivate me more to help write quicker so this doesn't take another 2 months 🥲 Anyways if y'all have any feedback or something you maybe wanna see happen in the story please feel free to let me know I'd love to write something y'all will read! :3

#one piece #white chase smoker #smoker #y/n #xreader #wattpad #fanfic #modern au

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mortalfollies · 4 months

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First Time Watches of 2023 (3/3)

SILENT NIGHT - The idea of a Christmas apocalypse film where everyone dies was immediately appealing to my mother and I because our family sucks. That Jojo Rabbit kid is fucking stellar, made me sob.

THE THING - practical effects 💖. Just such a solid film, again another tumblr recommendation I really wanted to tick off, the descent into distrust, the tension, the stakes, sexy Kurt Russell; yeah, 10/10.

LADYHAWKE - Everything about this was made for me except for that excruciatingly 80s score - get that sound outta here! Matthew Broderick is incredibly endearing as Phillipe “the mouse”, i absolutely adore him. The curse is brilliant - and hell, that scene with the transformation as they lie beside each other - MAN! I just wish that instead of telling us about the priest’s curse, and him summoning the devil or whatever, we’d been able to see it. Even if it had just been shadows on the wall, or a semi-animated sequence - would’ve added a little extra.

TREASURE PLANET - My friend Hannah had recommended this to me a decade ago and I’m very sorry it took a literal decade to get to it. The most I knew about Jim Hawkins was that people that made non/disney amvs back in the 2000s/2010s shipped him with Ariel, those Jelsa bitches don’t even know how bad it was. Anyway, this film was gorgeous, oh my god? And while I hate “I need a father figure” plots this one was well-written and genuinely moving. Great ensemble, tho the robot played by Martin Short feels unnecessarily jammed in.

THE LION IN WINTER - Numerous mutuals have posted about this; god, I’m so glad. This was another one I picked up a DVD of in my favourite antique place. KATHERINE HEPBURN. is everything. This whole thing was…insane…Shakespearean delivery for dialogue that is 90% fitting and then 10% bizarre. Timothy Dalton hot asf. Anthony Hopkins really using his eyes. All the Eleanor & Henry scenes are of course, absolute highlights - i love it when people just lie to each other, and between all of that, reveal their devastating truths - but what struck me most, and has stayed with me, is the three princes locked in the dark dungeon, reduced to little boys by the violent whims of their father & the schemes of their mother. a manipulator, a warrior, and, well, john, utterly powerless. Bizarre & entertaining.

THE BOY AND THE HERON - Saw this today, it was visually stunning; Mahito is a strong character and his VA is great; Mark Hamill delivers, but Christian Bale is wobbly, his accent fluctuating. The character of the Heron is a real highlight and wow, kudos to RPats. Love the world this film creates. Kiriko is my new fave ghibli woman. Dreamlike, mournful, fantastical, tugs on the heartstrings, enjoyable but actually made me appreciate Spirited Away more, which has never been one of my favourites but now I really wanna rewatch. Spoiler, btw, if you’re like that: when the tower started crumbling I started welling up because it just felt like a goodbye from Miyazaki, and I don’t even idolise him; it just really feels like his heart, and the heart of all the animators, was in this, and by god I appreciate that.

oh and a shout out to john wick 4, the peter cushing version of dracula, puss in boots the last wish & spiderverse 2, which were all pretty great! I have had a great time with movies this year.

#films #folly’s follies #yeah i copy pasted a couple of my letterboxed reviews thru out this #anyway! that’s my uh top 16 films of 2023 lol

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clarenecessities · 1 year

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3/25/23

i won my unemployment appeal! this means a judge reviewed my case & decided i had committed no misconduct, so now my old company owes me money, which i am very smug about.

it’s been over a year and i definitely over-prepared for the appeal (i was the only person who showed up & the judge said the amount of physical evidence i submitted felt like a ‘bombardment’) but it’s very like. validating. to hear from someone with no bias in my favor that actually, That Was Bullshit

i gave them a chance, too. like last march, they wanted me to sign this thing that waived literally all of my rights, including the right to file unemployment, and i was like, tell you what. you don’t have to pay me severance, i’ll sign your waiver, and we never interact again--if you amend my termination to a resignation.

like that was such a good out? why did they have so much faith in such a weak case? ik i’m laid back professionally but my tenacity was never in question. literally one of the pieces of evidence they submitted was syd telling me to “let it go” and me insisting i hadn’t even let the animation error in the Frozen gif she said it with go. i don’t let things go, man! i hold onto them forever! y’all knew that!

deadass don’t even care about the money. like i won’t say no to the money but for me this has always been about My Honor or whatever. i try like. real hard to be a good person. like i have severe anxiety about it. and honestly that’s not even to say that people who actually willfully commit time theft are bad people, like i fully encourage it! fuck the man! there’s a reason i didn’t rat out the 4+ coworkers i knew were playing video games on the job, & that’s because i hold myself not to moral standards but to insane made-up criteria which do not actually align with my beliefs. see: my inability to lie. lying is not a moral failure, it is a violation of the laws my OCD insists keep me from exploding into dust.

all this to say, being accused of something i didn’t actually do, like, smarted. that shit hurt my feefees. bc even if logically i know that not only am i innocent but that it would not be a condemnation if i weren’t, that doesn’t necessarily impact my brain diseases’ takes on the matter. but now i’ve got a legal declaration that they failed to prove me guilty of anything (except maybe being too accommodating, which like. :/ yeah)

not exactly absolution since again, i didn’t do anything wrong, but. feels nice to be believed. refreshing.

#daily clare #ctj5

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katnissgirlsmakedo · 7 months

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Hi I did read the first 4? I think that’s the number magisterium books as they were coming out I don’t remember a lot of them but I remember the general vibe as being Cassandra Clare and Holly Black co wrote Syfy’s the magicians fan fiction but for middle schoolers. Also I tried to figure out what happened in the last book from fan reactions and only sort of understood it, so I can ask you what are your feelings about the resolution of the romance plot? :D (also Hi I’m S I like just followed you but I love your blog from what I’ve seen)

I PROMISE IT'S BETTER THAN SYFY'S THE MAGICIANS. I PROMISE. i would highly recommend finishing reading the series, i also only read the first 4 as the came out and tbh i don't think when 5 came out i was in the right mental space to appreciate it but years later i think it can slay.... the mental and emotional buildup makes it better i think, which is good because at the end of the day the golden tower was um. not a good book. to me. it was insane of course, i still think you should read it, it's a crazy book... my problem with it is not just because of the romance subplot but iDO have a little beef with the romance subplot.... and we MUST get into it..... also. hi, i realize i did not open this with a greeting i just went straight into talking, but yeah hi hello it's lovely to have u here <3

ANYWAY. so as we all know from the Posting i have been doing, i am a big fan of call and tamara's weird little thing. but i don't entirely like the way it was resolved in book 5? like. there's nothing bad about it i guess. it's more that i feel like tamara as a charcater had to be put on the backburner for this book so that tamara as a love interest could come through. it felt like every time she was in a scene it was always about how call liked her and was worried she didn't like him back and etc etc and they can't kiss because aaron's in his head blah blah blah. it was like can we go back to talking about how cool tamara is. can we have her suggest making a bomb again. where was her slay in this book, where was her freakswag. again, it was never truly like, Bad, but it also wasn't great. and furthermore. they didn't give the same freak realness once they were actually romantic interests as they did during the buildup, which is always SO LAME. like. tamara saving call from alex at the end of the bronze key instead of aaron even though "aaron is the good one" will ALWAYS be more insane and crazy than them kissing or whatever. you know how it is.

on the other hand though, i LOVED jasper and gwenda. that was peak side character romance there.... wish gwenda had been a bigger character in the earlier books but oh well i guess i can't have everything. they kinda had a little lake and felix love victor swag..... but i can't get into that or i'll scream. also loved the way everyone got coupled off but aaron. literally his schrodinger's gay character realness..... cassie and holly were REFUSING to confirm or deny that boy's romantic inclinatons!! kind of a 2010s queerbait slay. although i would literally never accuse cassie or holly of queerbaiting, that would be like, so insane and would would so rudely diminish the actual insanely progressive work they've done for gay representation. you know. so. aaron was not queerbaiting he was like. well. veronica lodge voice it was saving the world... in a way. he's like a character that's obviously queer coded but needs to be censored for some reason. and that reason is literally just that this series is way too short to be getting into the complexities of aaron being gay and in love with call. he was relegated to subtext for time reasons, happens to the best of us <3

#also the series ends ith all of them planning to go to magic college together and i can only assume call and tamara will break up 3 times #over the course of their time there and alays get back together until they eventually get married.#hashtag toxic hets hashtag love wins #asks #🌀

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hummingbird-games · 7 months

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Dev Diaries

October 1, 2023

My goodness, it's the first devlog post-Crushed release!! How did that happen???

And where the heck has 2023 gone?!?! 🙃

Okay, pausing--for like four seconds--on the sillies, I've got some updates for y'all, so have a seat and get comfy.

Crushed updated build is out!!!

Now with the rest of the partial voice acting!!!

It was a super fun experience with the VA and I giggled a lot to hear the words I wrote spoken into existence. I think the next project I work on with voice work will also be partial. However, I can't imagine doing a whole game with full voice work. I can feel the mental break down from that possibility making its descent....

The postmortem was longer than I anticipated it to be, so it shall be posted separately (and with a read more for your scrolling needs) sometime! I go into (more) details on my inspiration and the process from hesitant idea, to jam entry, to a full-blown game, and all the heartbreak and burnout and catharsis in between!

You can also search 'gamedev rambles' or 'crushed vn' where I've already blabbed about Development Tingz LOL.

2. The HBG Twitter account has been nuked.

Yeah. Apologies if this is how you're finding out about it. I honestly have no idea where my audience is located as y'all are a quiet (but supportive) bunch. But for me as a player, it hurts because many of my peers are only on or are most active on Twitter.

However, me and the bird app have been at odds for a while so I guess it was just a matter of time... 🥲

3. Game Jam Gemini Mode

Alright, time to get serious-serious. (HA!)

While I was Fighting The Good Fight concerning getting Crushed up before the summer ended, I started dropping hints about the next project I wanted to work on with Yuri Jam (and Once Upon A Time jam) coming up.

Well. After giving it some thought, forcing myself to pause long enough to breathe, catching up on personal reading and other things, and again, giving it more thought: nope.

I could ignore this decision which I hate and push on anyway, but the consequences are not ones I want to deal with, nor will I be physically able to handle. (Yes, this is a direct reference to my health lol).

My plan about this time was to start reaching out to people and create a team--given that I banged out a script at lighting speed just so I knew what roles I needed and was prepared. I'm still not sure where that burst of frenzied energy came from, but it's gone now.

And then in between making Crushed live and getting the first voiced update done, I started to feel really weird. Like "Hello, Anxiety My Old Friend" weird. And I kept berating myself for dragging my feet, especially as Yuri Jam (and OUAT) are so 'chill' and 'easy-going' and why was I still freaking out? What was wrong with me???

Anyway, once the last voiced update went live, it hit me how utterly exhausted I was. Still am(?) So it's insane to think I was somehow going to have enough energy to lead a whole ass team to create one more project before the year ends. Even if said project was under 5k words.

Even as I write this saying I'm done, a part of me keeping scheming up ways to make it work.

But I wouldn't be doing it for the right reasons anyway (i.e. feeling like I should participate in more jams because every other developer is and I'm a bad indie dev if I don't, and feeling this desperation to prove I can tell other kinds of stories. ahahahaha)

A L S O I am broke 😂 And money talks louder than anything else!! This was the year--and continues to be the year-- of medical expenses and emergencies so like...gotta recover from that too.

The Knight Dance (my short Yuri idea) shall return, but next year at the earliest. And who knows? It might benefit from me not working on it now. Or that's what I'm telling myself so my brain will chill.

4. Tackling Ko-fi

I keep saying I'm going to start putting content on ko-fi, or posts, or something, and I keep proving to be a liar. That ends soon!

I've been playing around with the idea of adding both content for subs and one-time donators as well as free content, these things all exclusive to ko-fi. So there's an incentive to you guys to visit and an incentive for me to keep up with it.

There's a lot to the world of HSD/Crushed that just didn't make it into the games, and probably won't for a while, and then there are drabbles and longer stories that would be fun to write and share for anyone who's curious.

Okay!!!

In conclusion!!!

Go play Crushed!! Go support some game Kickstarters!! Go support a Pateron/Ko-fi of your fave creator!! Go replay some games!!

And watch this space for the Crushed postmortem and my yearly games & demos wrap up!!

And maaaaaaaybe catch me on the sideblog where I embody the cringe gamer girl I truly am???

~ Gemini

#gamedev #crushed vn #the knight dance #updates and rambles

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leviathancries · 8 months

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tragic love songs to study to (vol. 5)

[DUCKBOY] (2023)

Tragic Love Songs To Study To is Ruby da Cherry (from $uicideboy$) newest solo project. Going by the name DUCKBOY for this album adding to his ever-growing list of aliases. Personally something I have been waiting for, for a long fucking time. Ruby (DUCKBOY) managed to tap into his roots in punk and created this mini album. Much to the upset of most of his zoomer iPad baby fanbase who only want KILL MYSELF! DRUGS! SATAN!!! music.

Track 1: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

"You may hang up or press 1 for more options"

To be honest as an intro track I have heard better, It does set a pretty good (dial)tone for the theme of the album. (people bothering him and trying to call him)

Track 2: ROUGAROU (i've become the monster

"Let's pull back the tide and see if the moon is dead!"

ROUGAROU starts off the album strong with that signature 2000's emo pop-punk vibe. I'm a huge fan of Ruby in general but I feel on songs like this his potential as an artist shines best. His style of singing is so suited to this type of song and it's a shame he hasn't made music like this sooner lol. (yeah before you try and be a smart ass I have listened to his punk shit from his old bands, ur not cool for knowing that) Also the hook of the song is so fucking catchy it's been stuck in my head since the album came out. "I HAVE ALL NIGHT TO HUNT, I PROMICE TO PROTECT YOU WITH MY CURSE!" insane.

Track 3: where y'at, duckboy?

"Oh my god, call me ASAP..."

Interesting choice to put an interlude as the 3rd track on the album, but it is only a 7 song album so I guess it is more forgivable. That being said I actually really like this song. It carries on with the theme of people calling Ruby and bothering him. The simple hip-hop trap beat with that smooth bass kinda fucks to be honest.

Track 4: XXL hadron collider

"I ain't crying over spilt milk, but who's gonna clean this mess?"

Track four thrusts us right back in that 2000s emo mindset. Singing about suicide and betrayal has never been so cool to be honest. This is probably my favorite song on the album solely because it has such a nostalgic sound to it. This song just reminds me of being super young watching AMV's on YouTube in 2008. Like listen to this song and tell me this doesn't remind you of that. And again Ruby flexes on us with his talent of writing catchy hooks. Also the vocal style switch up between verse one and two is unmatched.

Track 5: my love life needs a lobotomy

"I spent the whole night throwing up your spiiit!"

Track four and five seamlessly flow into one another. I mean the song is only 41 seconds so it's pretty much just verse three of track four separated into it's own track. BUT IT'S A FUCKING GOOD SONG DAMNIT! like really fucking good. Not really much else to say about this one.

Track 6: where y’at, duckboy?? "Call me back dawg..."

Another interlude. More voicemails. More chill-hop beats. If I had to compare this one to the other interlude I prefer the other one. Although the girl who says "Thank you" at the end sounds cute :3

Track 7: after further reasoning, i’m going to bed

"I'll live as long as my little lungs last!"

Last track of the album. Track seven is another pop-punk song, using catchy guitar riffs and upbeat drums. Ruby shows off his versatile voice on this song using different vocal styles and a good variety of pitch. Homeboy went crazy not gonna lie. Another memorable song IMO. Just another thing to add to my long, long list of good Ruby songs and verses.

Overview: tragic love songs to study to (vol. 5)

I know I was essentially throating Ruby in this review but what can I say? I love the dude. He's a huge inspiration for me. Personal opinions aside ill say the good and bad about the album as a whole.

It's fuckin' short. Like short as fuck. Like out of the 7 songs we have an intro and 2 interludes. That only leaves 4 actual songs, one of which is only 41 seconds long. That being said, the full songs on this album are fucking amazing. Like really, really good. If you are into 2000s pop-punk, emo nostalgia shit. Check this out. The songs are super catchy, well produced and well written. This album has been a long time coming since Ruby has hinted at a solo project for years and I'm hoping for more in the future!

Rating: 8/10

If there's any typos or inconsistencies in this review it's because I can't be bothered to proof read it.

#music #review #music review #pop punk #punk #$uicideboy$#ruby da cherry #duckboy

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the-strange-world · 10 months

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Rating June Kpop Releases

Masterpiece (10) / Amazing (9) / Good (7-8) / Ok (6) / Meh (5) / Didn’t like (0-4)

Die For Love - B.I feat Jessi - 5/10 (2 title tracks for this album) ➕

Dare To Love - B.I feat. BIG Naughty - 8/10 ~ fav bside - Beautiful Life and Cloud Thought

Mañana (Our Drama) - ZHOUMI feat. EUNHYUK - 9/10

TIME DIFFERENCE - AaRON - 2/10

S-Class - Stray Kids - 8/10 ~ fav bsides - DLC, FNF, and ITEM. I liked Youtiful too (the “iiiii made it mine” and the other parts after that in ITEM really reminds me of another song so if anyone else knows what I’m song in thinking about please tell me)

Crush on you - Kassy - 5/10

SHALALA - TAEYONG (NCT) - ♾/10 - obsessed with this silly song ~ fav bside - Virtual Insanity

#menow - fromis_9 - ♾/10 - they are incapable of having a bad song! This song has been on REPEAT the most!!! The “yeah that’s me yeah that’s me” part and all the parts are EVERYTHING! The choreography is amazing. They never miss. I’m obsessed with this song ~ fav bsides - Attitude. I liked Don’t Care too

Wasteland - KANG DANIEL [Prerelease] - 10/10

Kick It 4 Now - THE NEW SIX (TNX) - ♾/10 - LOVE THIS SONG! The choreography is amazing. I’m obsessed with the “nostalgia deja vu” part so much!!! I’ve noticed a lot of the title tracks recently have felt very 90s or 2000s to me ~ fav bsides - 1000 Miles

Diaryy - YongYong - 5/10 ~ fav bside - Cheetos feat. ZENE THE ZILLA

Jump - P1Harmony - ♾/10 - INCREDIBLE ALBUM! WOW THEY NEVER MISS!!! The choreography is amazing too. Idk how they can do all that without passing out ~ fav bsides - More Than Words, Heartbeat Drum, and Love Me For Me. I liked New Classic too. The only one I wouldn’t listen to again is I Am You

Juliet - AleXa - 6/10

Can’t Go Yet - Amber Liu feat. Scott Hoying - 10/10 - if Scott’s involved, it’ll be good

Blooming Today - CHEEZE - 6/10

Let Me In - EXO - 3/10 - I really didn’t like this

C.C - Q6IX - 7/10

Designer - VAV - 4/10 ~ fav bside - Call U Mine

Ready to Move - REN - 6/10

Blank - OYEON - 7/10 - it’s pretty and of course nas are always good

Delicious - THE BOYZ [JP] - 10/10 - this song was already released last month ~ fav bsides - Lip Sync. I liked EYES ON ME and Take Me Back too

I Need Love - DKB - 8/10 - it was the best song off the album to me

FIREWORK - &Team - 9/10

Contrail - Baek yebin - 7/10

To Me - Jung Seung Hwan - 7/10 - not something I’d listen to often but it’s pretty ~ fav bside - Epilogue

Marshmallow - MISAMO - 3/10 - didn’t like it

BOUNCY (K-HOT CHILI PEPPERS) - ATEEZ - 8/10 - I liked it but it’s no halazia. It grew on me because I didn’t like it that much at first. I think DJANGO should’ve been the title ~ fav bsides - DJANGO and Outlaw. I liked This World too. Wake Up is guerrilas twin

Walk & Shine - QI.X - 6/10

Can’t Leave - Park Jeup - 5/10

LUV LUV LUV - GreatGuys - 8/10 - it’s fun

Broken Melodies - NCT DREAM [Prerelease] - ♾/10 - they popped off with this pop song of the summer. One direction vibes. Peak boy band energy. I love this song!

WE GO HIGH - ROY KIM - 9/10 - it’s a chill summery song

SOS - KANG DANIEL - 8/10 ~ fav bside - Liar

Queen - We;Na - 10/10 - they are soooo underrated! They only have 2 songs but both are so fun!!!

Orange, You’re Not a Joke to Me - Stella Jang - 10/10 - the lyrics are so silly

Lucky! - KIM JAE HWAN feat. BOBBY - 7/10

Pony - JANNABI - 8/10 - I love his voice

Unlock it - BABYS - 5/10

Voyager - LUN8 - ♾/10 - I think they have the same comeback as weki meki. GIVE WEKI MEKI A COMEBACK RN COWARDS!!! Anyway this song and album are really AMAZING! It shocked me how much I liked this album ~ fav bsides - Wild Heart, We Like It, Live In The Moment

BODY SHAKE - Bunny.T - 9/10

OVERDRIVE - I.M - 6/10 - not something I’d listen to a lot ~ fav bside - Not Sorry

The Feeling - SHINee [Prerelease] - 10/10

HARD - SHINee - 8.5/10 - of course shinee never disappoints me! The lyrics are so dumb which is fun. I wish the chorus was catchier tho. I love the choreography. Not really something I’d listen to too too much but a great song!!! ~ fav bsides - Like It (this really reminds me of another song but I can’t think of what it is. I think it’s a kpop song but I’m not sure) and Sweet Misery. I liked most of the bsides

Over the Rainbow - Hi-Fi Un!corn - 10/10

WICKED LOVE - YENA [Prerelease] - 5/10

Hate Rodrigo - YENA feat. YUQI - 10/10 - a yena and yuqi collab? That’s everything

Dive Into - Han Seungwoo - 6/10 - I would’ve picked runnin high as the title track ~ fav bsides - Burn and Runnin’ High

4:ever - 24 o’clock - 9/10

Summer Love - Kim Areum - 5/10

odd eye - YU YEON WOO - 9/10

EXCEL - 8TURN - 6/10 ~ fav bside - ING

2017 - Park So Eun - 10/10 - idk this artist but these songs were so good! I like the vibe of her songs ~ fav bside - 2:13 and I liked all of the songs

Party Tonight - U-KISS - 9/10 ➕

The Wonderful Escape - U-KISS - 8/10

House on a Hill - Eric Nam - 10/10

Small Talk - Kim Sung Kyu - 6/10 ~ fav bside - It Will Be. I liked Sometimes too

Signal - Rocking doll Roa - 5/10

OVERDRIVE - WEi - 9/10

GRL GVNG - XG - 4/10

Hear Me Out - EXO [Prerelease] - 5/10

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asahicore · 11 months

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hi!!!!!!!!! hello, im actually so excited to write this cuz ive just read “our secret moments” and aAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA, first thing, ive to say is i remeber recommending dress by tswift as a perfect song for this AND OMG u did use it <3 im so happy !!!!

okay, but lets get down to business!!

1.i loved that we got an inside on heeseung and what he has been up to!! it was really wholesome to read his own “figuring out i like my sisters best friend”, it was so cute and his overall makeover - that was fun to read!! also the bit of him meeting jake lmaoo that made me laugh ^^ i can totally see that !!!

2.the "lets avoid him" trope was what i expected and it was exceeded perfectly !! like yes!! thank u !! also chaeyeong seeing right THROUGH yn was amazing, yeah gurl u aint slick !!! but thanks for making the dumbass (yn) confront hee tho!!! bless!!!

3. PLEASE THE WHOLE MOVIE NIGHT STUFF??????? i giggled and kicked my feet like a little girl, omg, it was so amazingly written i could feel everything !!!every heart fluttering moment was described so well!!! I WAS AMAZED!!! and hooked on the story even more!!!!! their talk “so dont” 2eojiwfndwqdsjekwdsnjfsd making out in the kitchen was a superior scene!!!!

4. their "sneaking around" was also so well narrated!!! car is THE SPOT !!! omg and the star gazing :((( making out in the backseat tho 🤭🤭🤭

5. the pool party tho………consider me dead cuz it was so good, I LOVED THAT SCENE too, i mean..shirtless hee?? being playful in the pool? making heart eyes?? going on the slide with yn? kissing her THIGH?? MAMMA MIA !! :OO, toooooooooooo goooooooooooood

6. ngl the fact that yn didnt tell Seeun the truth when she asked had me "oh NOO this is bad innit?" i knew this was not gonna end well whyyyyyy, i mean i get why cuz she was scared BUT :((((

7. and for the BIGGEST JAW DROPPING MOMENT OF THE FIC WHICH I READ LIKE THIS :OOOO, the bedroom/shower scene HOLY FATHER AND THE HOLY SPIRIT!!!!! I ASCENDED… the dry humping was so fucking hot,i mean , the idea itself BUT THE WAY U WROTE IT i was wowed and also they were so cute and heeseung IS THE BIGEEST SIMP EVER in a good way like his thoughts on not knowing what to do but doing what makes yn feel good……………………….god me when!!! REALLY IT WAS AMAZING!! THE SHOWER THO like i melted cuz of the whole "we can stay in our swim suit bby" was so adorable :(( AND THEY ACCIDENTAL I LOVE U I DIED I WAS NOT READY AND THEN IT GOT SO STEAMY??????????? HELLO??? I DIED SO MANY TIMES ALREADY LORD (emma) HAVE MERCY, it was too good, I swear to god them just wanting to make the other person feel good was and is the hottest concept and u made it CHIEF'S KISSES!!!!!! doll >>>>>>>>> ,

8. and then they were cuties again :(((( the morning scene had me melting i'm literally a puddle of fluff on the floor !!! let me walk u to the door and kiss u goodbye OH THIS IS NOT GOOOD GUYS !!! ABORT ABORT!!!!!!!!!!!!

9. ,............................ Seeun :(((( please the last scene broke my heart even though i know it was gonna happen, im so sad mann, i hope they gonna figure it out cuz if this has a sad ending then i will still read but my heart would never recover ANYWAY the way hee grabbed her but she just push him ->>>> emotional damage

UFFFFFFFFFFFF, THIS WAS 24K WORDS OF PURE MASTERPIECE, I ENJOYED EVERY BIT OF THIS, THANK U THANK U!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 It was so with the wait !!!! i'm so seriously in love with this !!! thank u sm for the time and work and everything that put into this it was MESMERIZING!!! the details and descriptions emma. ure insane, i swear u just so amazing!!! kissing ur brain URE THE BEST What the frick

emma i love u!! this made my weekend, i hope u gonna have a great week <3333 all the best ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

ps. this is so long im sorry :>

ANOOOOOOON !!!!! dont apologize omg receiving asks like these are the absolute best, i was smiling like an idiot and punching my pillows reading this thank you so so much !!! and omg thank you again for the song rec, it went so perfectly with the story!!

im glad u liked heeseung's part!! since gorgeous was all in reader's pov i thought it'd be nice to see how heeseung was feeling and have his backstory and all that... and yes jake hahaha he was really fun to write about

no cause thank god for chaeyeong otherwise these two idiots would probably still be stuck in their awkward phase 😭

AAAH movie night scene omg im so happy u enjoyed it !! i had kind of a hard time writing it cause i felt like it needed a lot of tiny details ugh so reading this is such a relief!! same for the pool party at first i had noooo idea how i was gonna write it lmao

im so glad u liked the smut part omg for some reason these are the scenes im always most unsure of !! but yeah these two are so sweet like they just want to make the other happy BUT AAAAH TY SO SO MUCH IM SO GLAD IT MADE U REACT THAT WAY 😭😭

and ikkkk yk how it is we needed at least a little bit of angst but yes dont worry i will give them a happy ending !!! which honestly i feel like is more realistic than a bad ending.. seeun and yn just need to talk things through 🥰

anon i seriously cannot thank u enough for this <333 ur the one who made my weekend !!!! when i receive asks like yours it makes me really happy to have started writing and posting on here :)) i appreciate u sm and love u too and hope u have a lovely rest of ur weekend!!!!<3333

#answered #anon #work: hey heeseung

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