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catindabag · 5 months

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TBOSAS on Crack short take (51)

*The Power of “Love”* Read [this] first.

Felix: Andie, stop the pizza truck right now before we crash!

Androcles: I don’t know how!😭

Felix: We’ve already passed the city’s maximum speed limits!

Androcles: What’s a speed limit?!

Hilarius: Who even taught you how to drive, Anderson?!

Androcles: Nobody!

Hilarius: Then why did you show us your freaking driver’s license?!

Androcles: That was fake! Dennis gave it to me!

Dennis: That’s a lie! You stole it from me!

Androcles: Potato, potato!

Felix: Andie, eyes on the road before you hit the zoo’s entrance gates-

Lysistrata: And the gates flew off.

Felix: The gates f*ckin’ flew, Anderson!! The gates f*ckin’ flew to the moon!

Androcles: I’m Sorry!😫

Vipsania: My auntie is so gonna strangle us for this!

Gaius: Heck! My mama will kill and disown me at the same time!

Coryo: Felix, please tell me that we’re not paying for those gates!

Felix: I hope not!

Coryo: I have no money! Sejanus, my love, help me!😫

Sejanus: I’ll pay any bill for you, my love~!😍

Coryo: Andie, watch out! There’s a rabid raccoon crossing the road!

Androcles: Should I hit it too?!

Coryo: No-

Juno: Kill it, Andie! kill it!😈

Persephone: Andie, turn left! The Tributes’ enclosure is right there!

Androcles: My left or your left?!

Persephone: We have the same view, Andie!!

Livia: I knew we should’ve just taken my ✨hot pink limousine✨!

Dennis: Liv, why are you even here?

Livia: For the ✨drama✨.💅

Florus: Guys, I think I’m going to puke!🤢

Juno: No! Not in front of my exclusive pajama onesie!😫

Felix: Andie, slow down! We’re almost there!

Coryo: Seriously, Anderson, park this f*ckin’ pizza truck before we hit something else!

Florus: Or someone!

Clemensia: Just hit the brakes already!

Androcles: Which one?!

Clemensia: I don’t know!

Felix: All of them?!

Coryo: Sejanus! Sej, Babe, do something!😭

Sejanus: Of course, Babe! Anything for my Coryo~!😍 *squeezes Andie to the side and hits the brakes*

Felix: Finally!

Gaius: Are we still alive?!

Coryo: I love you, Babe!😭

Sejanus: I love you too!!

Festus: I can’t believe the power of ✨Snowjanus✨ saved us all!

Sejanus: It’s the power of love!!

Coryo: Sure, Babe. Whatever you say-

Sejanus: My Coryo, my love, my Snow Bae, kiss me. Kiss me now~!!

Coryo: Fine. Come here.

Sejanus: Yey!😍 *starts making out with Coryo*

Livia: Can someone open these ugly ✨peasant doors✨ for me?

Felix: Liv, this is a pizza truck-

Livia: I need to get out ASAP before idiot Plinth takes their “love” making to the next level-

Felix: They’re already making out in front of us.😑

Livia: That’s the point.

Lysistrata: Get my expensive Snowjanus cameras, Creed!

Festus: Just a minute, Lizzie. My Percy Bae needs my help.

Persephone: The pizzas, Festus Bae! The bacon pizzas are ruined!😩

Festus: They’re still edible-

Florus: But where’s the milk?

Dennis: At the back with Vipsania and Palmyra-

Florus: You left the milk with Palmyra?!

Dennis: It’s fine! Palmyra can’t drink them all-

Palmyra: Hey, guys, funny story-

Felix: Monty, did you perhaps “accidentally” emptied 10 gallons of milk when we were driving?

Palmyra: Vipsania dared me to-

Vipsania: I did not! I was too busy holding on for my dear life!

Androcles: My driving was perfect, Sickle! Nobody died!

Felix: Fine.😞 Let’s just get out, meet our Tributes, and tell them about ✨Operation Felix✨-

Clemensia: For the last time, Class Pres, we are not calling your brilliant plan to stop the Hunger Games “Operation Felix.”🙄💅

Felix: But-

Vipsania: I agree. “Operation Felix” sounds lame. Instead, let’s call it ✨Operation Hunger No More✨-

Everyone: No.

Vipsania: Ugh! Fine. Let’s call it Operation Freedom-

Felix: No. My granduncle is allergic to that “F” word.

Vipsania: He’s allergic to freedom?!

Felix: He’s also allergic to rebels and mole people.

Vipsania: What the heck are mole people?!

Felix: People who secretly hide inside underground bunkers without telling the government about their existence or location.

Sejanus: Like those mole people living in District 13!

Vipsania: Don’t say that word!

Sejanus: District 13.😀

Felix: District 13? What’s that? Is that a new animal? Is it edible? Can we cook District 13?

Vipsania: Yup. Felix is in his “trauma” zone again.😔

Sejanus: But District 13 still exist!

Clemensia: We know! Everyone in our little circle knows! That’s why we are pretending that it doesn’t exist!

Sejanus: But why though?

Coryo: To protect House Ravinstill and their sacred Bichon Frisé puppies.

Sejanus: That’s all?!

Coryo: Pretty much. I mean, look at poor Felix. He’s crying again.

Felix: Is District 13 a ham?!😭

Sejanus: Fine! District 13 doesn’t exist. Now give me another kiss, my love!😍

Coryo: Sure. Come here-

Clemensia: We’re still not calling it Operation Felix though.

Coryo: Can we just change the name later? Sejanus and I are in a hurry to-

Lysistrata: Make out and f*ck?

Coryo: No, not yet. We’re doing that later.

Sejanus: We can also do it here, my love!😘

Clemensia: Ew. No. Not in front of my eyes, you fool!

Coryo: Later, Babe. At your place.

Sejanus: At my place?! Oh, my love, I’m so excited!😍

Coryo: Yeah. But for now, let’s go talk to Marcus Spartacus and Lucy Goosey.

Androcles: Yo, Sej-

Sejanus: What?

Androcles: Get off. You’re squeezing me to death.

Sejanus: Sh*t. I totally forgot about you, Andie. Sorry.😞

Festus: Lol. The power of love almost killed Anderson.

Androcles: Creed, shut up.

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charliedawn · 2 years

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How would the slashers react to meeting their cannon selfs?

Both Penny's didn't say anything at first, silently observing each other curiously, especially since Penny and Canon Penny were separated by iron bars.

Canon Penny smiled mockingly after a while before leaning forward to whisper in insincere concern.

"Look at yourself..Locked up..They are all afraid of you..They fear you and yet, you stay here. Chained up by the people you call friends." His eyes changed to a bright orange in the darkness as he spat the next word mercilessly. "Pitiful."

Penny glared at him, but only chuckled at the other one's words.

"It may be so. But, I am more free than you'll ever be.."

Canon Penny tilted his head to the side curiously, wondering what his other one meant by that.

"How..So ?"

Penny leisurely turned his gaze to him and gave him a toothy grin.

"We are both afraid of death, but I found a way to live forever. While you ? You will die. Alone. Forgotten. Unwanted. A sad sad clown."

Canon Penny growled and tried to tear the cell open to grab Penny, but to no avail as he was sent flying backwards by the old runes protecting the cage.

Canon Freddy found Freddy taking care of his garden and sneered spitefully at the sight, stomping on the flowers carelessly to get to Freddy and raise him in the air.

"What the...?! Aren't you a f*ckin' ray of absolute sunshine ?!", Freddy exclaimed as he saw his trampled flowers and Canon Freddy gritted his teeth before yelling.

"Really ?! Gardening ?! Since when did we turn into such a p*ssy ?! You're a f*ckin' disgrace !"

Freddy glared daggers at his doppelganger before punching him so hard, Canon Freddy's head twisted in irregular angles.

"F*ck you !", Freddy shouted as Canon Freddy turned his head back in place '

"Nah ! F*ck you !", he then replied before flipping him off.

A lot of Freddy fighting Freddy followed.

Freddy in a nutshell.

Michael *sees his doppelganger* : "...What in the...?"

Canon Michael *immediately tries to stab Michael*

Michael *ducks and runs*

Canon Michael is a constantly very angry and bloodthirsty Michael Myers who would recognize his other self as a family member.

And we all know what happens to people related to Michael Myers..

Canon Myers *attempts to stab him*

Myers *blocks his attack with his own knife and they start fighting until one of them either dies or cannot fight anymore*

Jason *sees his doppelganger* : "You're...me ?"

Canon Jason *tilts his head curiously*

Jason *looks around and points to his frog collection* : "Hum..Do you want to see my frogs ?"

Canon Jason *looks at the vivarium and nods*

They spent the day taking care of the frogs and even though Canon Jason sometimes tried to chop off Jason's head, they got along better than most.

"So..No brother, huh ?", Pennywise asked and the other one shrugged.

"Nope."

"Good for you."

"And you ? Not eating kids anymore ?"

"Nope."

"Good for you."

Awkward silence.

"...Wanna prank somebody ?", Canon Pennywise asked and Pennywise agreed.

"Yup."

They started laying traps all around the hospital and a symphony of screams and annoyed groans raised in the air.

A prankster will remain a prankster.

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thornoisdono · 2 years

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Ello to the 1 person who will see this! Since I am so incredibly bored and cant sleep I decided i’d rank dragon ball dads. I’ll be surprised if anyone knows what i’m talkin bout sknce I dont see too many posts bout it. Also i’m doin this worst to best and z movie paragus and super paragus will be ranked as dif characters and grandpa gohan will count

So for las place we haveeeeeee

Is anyone really surprised? I mean even vegeta hates him even tho king vegeta sent broly to his death cause of royal bloodline stuff. And he rlly didnt teach vegeta well at all . I mean vegeta inherited his dads ideals and stubborness and if it wasnt for goku sparin him hed be ded

Second on our list issss

King cold

Unlike king vegeta cold is seen to have a small bit of actual care for his boi telling him to watch out for bills and buu so he doesnt die. Other then that rlly crappy dad

3rd on the ranker issss super paragus

If this was jus him from the first half hour hed be top tier in dads. But he did put a f-ckin shock collar on his child so hard no

Next up isss bardock

He rlly didnt do the bes with raditz lrob cause he was a bad kid or whatev. But he did wish the best for kakarot . Still wasnt around much but hey least he didnt put a collar on him

Nezt up isss z paragus

Yes paragus does leave the planet his sons on but broly was able to destroy a whole galaxy so i think he can breathe in space. Def best of the sayian parents.

So hes higher then his super ver cause he uses magic that doesnt physically harm or traumatize broly. Couldve taught his som a lot better and tried helpin him butttt he did more then the others

Next up is son goku

Goku did set a gokd standard for his kids… buttttt hes mostly trainin and or ded when he could be helpin raisin them. Hes not awful tho and does love his kids . May not be the bes parent buttt he is carin in his goku way

Next up iZz

Good ol grandpa gohan .

The reasin hes not higher is cause he couldn’t be around for a lot of gokus life tho understandable since he did d i e

But he taught goku disclipline. To be respectful. And is a huge reason why gokus so pure . So respect to him

Next up izzz

I mean the creator of dragon ball confirms hes better then goku as a dad and a lot of proof in the show that hes good. Yall know hes good by this point

Now why is he above grandpa gohan ? Welll We dont see much of grandpa gohans upbringing of goku. Tho if not for him dragon ball may not have a happy tone . He’s a great father from what we can infer from gokus behavior so he earned his spot. Butttt we see more of vegetas fatherly side specially in gt thas mos of what we got from him there.

Next up izzz

Not what ya expected huh?

Even if he has an egotistical persona. Hes a caring and lovin dad to videl. Yes the fact that he wouldnt late anyone date her less they were stronger then him sounds egotistical. But i believe he means he wants someone strong and loving to be there for her when he dies. Also hes a single parent and videl turned out to be an intelligent , well mannered. And good kid. Also the scene where videls given a senzu he can come off as annoyin. But he doesnt know what it is. In his pov a dude came in insists she eats a green substance hercule doesnt know what it is. His reaction is reasonable and human like. Hes supportive, loving, and a fun dad. Hail to the champ baby

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amiz06-certified-b1mb0 · 2 years

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HFIL EP.4 CAME EARLY, IM BLESSED

First up, we got the HFIL ‘Mean Girls’

Yooo I wonder where Raditz is sneaking off to, what do you guys think?

Did Cell got to EAT HIS CEREAL THO? Also Guru giving off that ‘smartass grandpa’ vibes

Star of the episode goes to…JEICE!⭐️

They thought their Captain got PTSD and they chose TLC, I LOVE these fruity soldiers. Ginyu is their pupper now❤️

“WAAAA GETCHO F*CKIN DOG B*TCH, it don’t bite, YES IT DO-“

FrogGinyu tried to ’EAT’ Cell coz he’s a bug… PFFTT WHO ALLOWED THIS 💀

This broke me. Technically Frieza ‘kinda’ got him back coz he made Cell say “what?!” like he did with Frieza in ep3. Soooo Task Failed Successfully ✨ This counts as flirting

*I Just Died In Your Arms plays in the bg*

NAPPA WAS IN HFIL with Raditz, kinda sweet imo❤️ back when he still cared enough to wear his armour 😭(yet Ghost Nappa somehow existed?? Idk)

In a span of 1 week, HFIL art shall be created after an episode is released. Choosing the best scenes imo. Hope you enjoyed this and the episode! Reblog if you want!✅🔁

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wearepurplejackets · 2 years

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Tokyo Revengers Theory: Mikey knows some sh*t here...

It still disturbs me that Mikey knew Takemichi came back and... he did nothing. I mean he knows everytime he came back was because something was f*cked up out there. I'm understanding, I guess, that he also knows he is in the past in the first place just to save him (and he doesn't want to be saved, no way) because if not.... WHAT THE F*CK????

I mean, he would be like, looking at his hand after a random battle: "Takemitchy, you came back.... Oh, and I don't give a f*ck, see you in the fight, hope I won't kill you by any chance but."

And I also believe Mikey knows a lot this time. I f Takemichi can see the future now, do you think Mikey also can? (I will not bet on that but... he knew Takemichi came back... who knows... anyway,) The way he looked at his hand and reached to his heart in the battle of the 3 Deities was for 2 reasons.

1. Because Draken was the last part of his pure heart.

And 2. Most important here, because Mikey knows this is his fault.

(I mean is not, but he believes that. Of course. And his coping mechanism of surviving is to punish himself all the time. Draken punched him after Emma's death. Taiju punched him after being late to save the others. He let Kazutora hit him with a f*ckin pipe when he could avoid that... And THE MOST IMPORTANT the dialogue he had with South in the last fight: "You can't stop destroying everything around you. I'm the same. So I'm here to destroy you", ok boy, whatever, let's go to therapy). He knows why Takemichi came back, he knows Draken was alive in the last future, he knows this was all to save him AND HE REALLY just don't want to be saved. He wants to rot in darkness alone, because he believes all of this is his fault. That everyone died because of him, that he could not save anyone, that he could become an evil mafia boss so easy like, whatever, he knows all the truth. All the possibilities. And he said: "Okay, f*ck myself you know what???" If with that the rest can survive.

Takemichi f*cked up the day he told Mikey what happened in every future. Takemichi is his own f*cking Kisaki right now. Wtf!!! He doesn't have a f*cking breath.

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zeta-in-de-walls · 3 years

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Tommy and the role of ‘hero’

Hey, this little essay is discussing how Tommy’s character has struggled with being called a hero and hows it’s been a significant part of his character arc for Season 2 of the SMP. It’s not a title he ever gave himself yet it’s a title he’s burdened with all the same.

Funnily enough, I don’t recall Tommy ever being called a hero before Technoblade’s damning speech on Nov 16th, where he compared Tommy to Theseus.

Tommy you just did a coup. You just did a hostile Government takeover and then immediately instilled yourself as President. And then you gave it to your friend but that’s still a tyrant Tommy.

But the thing about this world Tommy, is that good things don’t happen to heroes. Let me tell you a story Tommy, a story of a man called Theseus. His country, well his City-State technically, was in danger and he sent himself forward into enemy lines. He slayed the Minotaur and saved his city. You know what they did to him Tommy? (”What did they do?”) They exiled him. He died in disgrace, despised by his people. That’s what happens to heroes Tommy. The Greeks knew the score. But if you want to be a hero Tommy, that’s fine.

Do you want to be a hero, Tommy? Then die like one!

Technoblade’s speech is a frustrating one at first. It begins by essentially calling Tommy a power hungry tyrant despite that being far from the truth - Wilbur was the one who formed the Government and Tommy rejected power. He trusted it to Wilbur who then chose Tubbo. Schlatt wasn’t even killed by Tommy, he died of a heart attack after being abandoned by every one of his allies so it wasn’t even really much of a takeover at all and it wasn’t Tommy. Yet this speech was entirely directed at Tommy.

But the latter half is different, accusing Tommy instead of trying to be a hero who thinks he’s saving the world and that he’s doomed to have a bad end. It’s interesting as never has Tommy claimed to be much of a hero. Tommy’s always just fought for the things he cared about. Indeed his response to Techno’s speech suggests the same.

“I’m not the hero. No one’s the hero! We’ve got L’Manburg for each other.”

But of course, Techno’s words stick with him all the same. Particularly the bit about a tragic end as Tommy becomes very, very aware of his own mortality in the arcs that follow. To Techno, a hero seems to be a naive figure who tries to do good but is destined for failure and tragedy.

But there’s another path Tommy fears even more. One that he’s witnessed firsthand. Becoming the villain.

Let’s be the bad guys. Tommy, why not? Our nation’s gone. our nation’s far behind us, Tommy. Let’s blow that motherf*cker to smithereens. Tommy, I say if we can’t have Manburg, no one - no one can have Manburg! ...L’Manburg.

This is a new era! We burn the place to the f*ckin ground, I want no crops to grow there ever again. I want f*ckin mycelium and cobblestone, it all covered, Tommy. I want it all gone!

Tommy, let’s be villains.

Wilbur was Tommy’s hero. He loved Wilbur dearly and wanted nothing more than to be a good right-hand to him and make him proud. But when they lost L’Manburg and were banished, Tommy saw Wilbur changing, saw him giving up home and deciding he’d rather destroy the thing they’d worked for and blow it all up. After Wilbur made this speech, Tommy argued, making it clear he was entirely against his plans. Even saying that it wasn’t the moral thing to do. He said not to give up hope, that everyone wasn’t against them and that Wilbur’s ideas were reckless. But he stayed with Wilbur and continued to support him, hoping that he could convince him to change his mind. Tommy failed. And Wilbur died.

So, the Tommy at the start of S2 just wants to go back to his old life, a simpler time where he doesn’t have to worry about L’Manburg anymore as it’s in safe hands and he can focus on his personal concerns once more - like his music discs. He doesn’t want to be a hero or a villain, he merely wants to be happy again in a world without Wilbur.

But there’s someone else watching him. Dream.

I think it’s no coincidence that Dream wanted Tommy exiled by his own people. I think he was deliberately trying to make Techno’s speech into a reality. Dream had become rather obsessed with Tommy and treated all their interactions like a fun game where he played the villain and Tommy, the hero. It’s not a narrative Tommy himself liked but all he could do was play along.

Dream had him exiled and this seriously pushed Tommy to his limits. On the first day, Techno briefly visited and asked him why he was still trying and he answered that he always gets back up and he would keep on fighting Dream. But as his exile progressed he slowly lost his will to fight. Slowly Tommy stopped believing that his exile would ever come to an end and that people still cared.

In exile Tommy had a lot of time for reflection. Here’s something Tommy says days into his exile when he’s begun to lose all hope and is starting to accept that maybe Dream’s his only friend.

Everyone always tells me I was the- the hero of this server. The one that came and f*ckin fought Dream - the only one that ever spoke back to him. But maybe I was just... maybe this was just meant to be.

Tommy’s got complicated feelings about being a hero. To him it means standing up to Dream, never giving up - that’s what he believed people expected of him. But in his exile, he began to give in to Dream. He begins to express how no one cares and that the only reason they ever pretended to care was when he had status - when he was part of L’Manburg. There’s this implication that he felt like people only cared about him when he was being the selfless hero. When he was trying to be selfish for once, causing trouble like he used to and wanting to focus on his personal disc war rather than on L’Manburg, he got exiled. (Of course, this is Tommy’s biased perspective not how others actually viewed him.)

Tommy eventually escaped his exile, finding renewed courage to fight against Dream. Except, he’s still scared and uncertain and feels confused about Dream. He feels lost and clings onto Technoblade for support.

With Technoblade, Tommy starts to feel more like himself - but Techno also influences Tommy, turning him more against his friends. (I think Techno’s character genuinely thought they didn’t truly care about Tommy, likely not realising how much they had also been manipulated by Dream.) Technoblade gently encourages Tommy to be more violent and wants him to help blow up L’Manburg.

This is where Tommy’s fear about becoming more like Wilbur come into play. Tommy did not want to become a bad guy - he’d had nightmares about it even. But in his time with Technoblade, after how helpless he’d been during his exile, being given some power lead Tommy to start lashing out more violently, he began to get more aggressive - alarmingly so even. Technoblade’s path was one of revenge, dealing with his own pain by causing others to suffer (for noble goals, fighting corruption etc I don’t want to get sidetracked though this is about Tommy). Technoblade’s presence was helpful to Tommy, helping him to get over much of his fear but he still lacked in agency and still felt lonely knowing he hadn’t made up with his friends.

Tommy finally came to his senses at the festival, where he realised he was fighting his best friend and putting his personal attachments - his discs - over Tubbo. And that was wrong. He realised he was becoming just the sort of person he didn’t want to be - he had been on the path to becoming like Wilbur. And he rejected that path. He wasn’t going to be a bad guy. Just because he was hurt didn’t justify hurting others. So he reconciled and once more committed to protecting L’Manburg, having put his personal desires aside. It seemed like he’d put himself into the role of selfless hero yet again.

And he failed. Again.

Dream tells him how it was a fun game to him. And how their story was not over. Tommy though, had become extremely tired of it. He didn’t want to play Dream’s game.

They meet up again. And again, Dream talks to Tommy like he’s important - like he’s the key to everything. He wants Tommy to play the role of hero and has been manipulating events for a long time to keep pushing him, to keep taking things from him. Being a hero, which Dream believes Tommy wants, simply means playing along with Dream’s narrative.

Tommy, you want to be a hero, right? You want to be the hero of the server. And every hero needs an origin story, right? Batman had his parents, Spiderman had uncle Ben, you have Tubbo, right?

In the end, Tommy refuses to play Dream’s game anymore though. He called for help and got saved by everyone else. Then he killed Dream twice and had him locked away for good.

And once more, Tommy decided to do things for himself again. He decided to live peacefully, working on a project, talking to various people on the server and trying to avoid making waves and getting into any more conflict. It’s a good end.

He rejected Wilbur’s path and he defied Technoblade’s predictions and he didn’t lose his best friend to Dream. And now Tommy’s trying to avoid playing the role of hero anymore. It’s not a title he ever gave himself but one thrust upon him. Yet it’s one he’s keenly aware of. And one that, despite everything, he can fulfil.

Tommy’s arc has been in some respects about defying the expectations of others - but he also can’t help but fight for the things he loves. He realises his troubles were not that his friends didn’t care or that he had to play a role but that his life was being controlled by Dream and now he’s free of that. No longer is he so weighed down by expectations but when there is a sufficiently threatening enemy, he has not lost his determination to challenge it.

#tommyinnit #meta #analysis #uh feel like i didn't have a great conclusion #anyway i love tommy's character #and his arc has been great this season #i especially appreciated how the exile arc really showed another side to his character #and dream's a great antagonist #driving much of this conflict #dream smp #exile arc #i didn't really talk much about love and attachments which are also impornant to understanding his character this season #and also his grief and thoughts on death #anyway this is about tommy not techno or dream or wilbur so i'm not analysing their actions except in regards to how they affected tommy #but feel free to add or correct me on anything #cheers!#the disc war

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ask-the-kitty-crew · 2 years

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Skid sat down on a sofa and sighed to himself. Thinking out loud, he said, "My other self needs more work. Every time an anon of some sorts bestows him with powers and new forms, he wastes them on benefitting himself.

"I remember one time he was able to string up people other than his Pump, but all he did was show off and be a scrub. There was another time when he was turned into a ghost, but that meant he technically... died. That anon killed him. And the mod, who constantly kicks him out of the spotlight, ironically went with it.

"Hell, he was even turned into something out of Chuck-E Cheese, and he STILL did nothing but sit in a box. How could he have moved around? Like Security Breach's Blob? Did he have wheels under there? The mod wasted a LOT of potential with not knowing about Funtime Freddy's existence.

"But still, sure, he looked creepier, but I'm assuming that even if he ends up looking like f*ckin Giygas from Earthbound, he'll still mentally act like a stupid pacifist.

"That's not how life works, other me. You don't understand. There are several types of conflicts you're always experiencing in life, even in kids' shows. Those are MEANT to teach valuable lessons to kids.

"Oh, right. You're an edgelord, other me. Your non-canonical mom raised you wrong. She stays away from anything with negativity and problems because 'oh, my kid MUST be happy and ONLY motherf*cking happy', NO, THAT IS NOT HOW LIFE WORKS YOU UGLY NONEXISTENT KAREN!!! YOUR KID IS NOT BEAUTIFUL!!! YOUR KID IS NOT PERFECT!!! YOUR KID IS JUST AS UGLY AS Y-"

"SKID!!!!!!!!"

Playtime stormed over to him.

"Didn't we make a truce with Shelby earlier to NOT slam yourself like that?!"

Skid sighed.

"Yeah, but... other me's making me feel bad again. He's making me feel like I'm the only Skid who's not like the others. I just...

"I feel alone."

Playtime understood how Skid felt, and sat next to him and hugged him.

"I feel like that too sometimes, actually," she said. "Everyone else gets attention except me, but when I do, I'm seen as an overused optimistic child stereotype by the whole internet. This lil ol me over here already knows the F word and can fight."

"Come to think of it..."

"I think you might not be alone after all."

(Shelby was in her bathroom,trembling,her face full of anger,tears welling up in her eyes while letting out growls and whimpers.)

M!A: eevee!~ (35/50)

#ask #reblog #m!a #eevee shelby

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saskaykun · 3 years

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Why do the f*ck I hate Kakashi f*ckin’ Hatake.

I may write a part 2, im just too lazy rn.

Considering the fact that kakashi is presented as the supreme elite, he is in no way superior to Might for example, even if the manga tries to make us swallow it by force. He's so overestimated, he appears with a rather traumatic story, he was a real daddy's boy, here no problem with that, Sakumo seemed to love more than all his son, but the thing is that his trauma has forced him to be a robot so much that it almost hurts me for him, he feels obliged to be the biggest bootlicker of the leaf to fit the mold. We all know that Kakashi is such a broken guy that he cries every night in his little bed with his shiruken sheets. But then why, he who seemed to be so close to Sasuke, suddenly showed himself to be the biggest asshole of humanity by asking a more than traumatized Sasuke, on the verge of an existential crisis, while he was alone in his corner, to stop being a crybaby and to behave like a man? In style, take your depression with you bruh and stop crying, have some balls. Shit. It's a desperate little boy, you who has lived through the loss of your beloved daddy, try to act a little bit like Naruto and why not try a "talk no jutsu", okay I take the fact that Sasuke's trauma made him withdraw into himself and that he refuses to talk about it easily, but there's even a moment, when he started to give himself up to Sakura during the bells exercise, like Sasuke was still an “open to talk about it”... it might have helped. I remind you that after kakashi's "stop being a crybaby" experiment, Sasuke gone totally insane.. and finally left konoha some days/weeks later.

We blame the four ninjas of Oto for having propagandized Sasuke to come and join Orochimaru, but in fact, they just pressed a little more on Sasuke's wound, they had no trouble to convince him, Kakashi had already taken care of it. Kakashi refused to behave like a responsible adult even though he too was traumatized, and I blame him for that. He announced that Sasuke was his favorite student because he reminded him of himself, but when he needed an outstretched hand, he spat at him and then was shy about Sasuke's actions afterwards. Kakashi, what did you expect?

And to tell the truth, Sasuke didn't like him so much.

Afterwards, to talk about something other than his personal relationship with Sasuke... Kakashi was the god of the ninja gods at the tip of Konoha. First real ninja fight we get is during the arc of the land of waves, Kakashi vs Zabuza, and how to say, Zabuza managed to put the famous Sharingan no Kakashi, K-O. Like what? I would have liked to have seen a real crazy duel, the two youngsters had to free Kakashi from his water prison, for him to come and defend them. Sasuke, Naruto and Sakura almost died at that moment, and frankly, for a guy who was supposed to be untouchable thanks to sharingan, he didn't live up to his reputation. Ok he's fast at making mudras.

And more, he is not even cute. Sorry.

#Kakashi #Kakashi Hatake #anti kakashi #naruto #sasuke #Sasuke Uchiha #uchiha clan #zabuza momochi

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catindabag · 10 months

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TBOSAS on Crack short take (32)

Lepidus: Hello, Panem! Welcome back to our show, The Table Talk. I’m your host, Lepidus Malmsey for Capitol News-

Casca: Start the show already!

Lepidus: Fine! For this season’s ✨Stars of The Week✨, we have invited our beloved Mentors from The Academy to sit down and chat with us!

Mentors: Hello, everyone.😔

Festus: *Quickly stands up* Can I switch seats with Pup? Arachne is giving me a lot of “evil vibes” today.😬

Arachne: *Is still wearing a neck brace after the Sandwich Zoo Incident* Oh, don’t act so f*ckin’ innocent, Creed. You tried to kill me in front of my Tribute 2 days ago!

Festus: Kill you?! I literally saved you from being stabbed and choked to death by your Tribute, you ungrateful spider!

Arachne: Oh, yeah! You freaking shoved me first, garbage boy!

Festus: You punched my beautiful face and gave me a black eye, you spoiled witch!

Arachne: Pay my hospital bills first, you trash loser!

Festus: Pay mine, you monster!

Casca: At least smile and look happy while arguing!

Festus: I’m doing my best!

Lepidus: Can we go back to-

Casca: Dammit it, Creed! Sit the f*ck down!

Festus: Fine!

Arachne: Suck a di-

Felix: Alright! That’s enough! Let’s go back to you, Mr. Malmsey.

Lepidus: Finally! My first question is for anyone and everyone.

Felix: Ok. Let’s hear it.

Lepidus: So what were your first thoughts and reactions when you first found out that you got selected for the Mentorship Program?

Livia: Unsurprised as always.

Juno: As expected for a Phipps.

Florus: My parents almost smiled at me. Almost.

Felix: My granduncle created another useless national holiday to celebrate my success.

Coryo: My cousin baked me a cake made out of cabbages.

Sejanus: My father threw money at me like confetti.

Festus: To be honest, I wasn’t even aware of the program. I just got in, and here we are.

Androcles: Just like we planned!

Lepidus: What do you mean by that?

Pup: What do you mean by what?

Lepidus: Weren’t you all selected because you guys are simply the best and the brightest of your year?

Hilarius: Fairly selected?!

Livia: I’m so sorry but I never heard of her before.

Domitia: The Best and the brightest?! Who told you that lie?

Persephone: You’re joking right?! I mean, just look at us!

Festus: Me?! The Academy’s village idiot?!🤣

Florus: Half of my grades are sh*t!

Pup: Sleeping and skipping classes are my best subjects!

Palmyra: Who told you I was smart?

Apollo: I’m not even the best at finger painting class.

Dennis: Do people honestly believe that BS?

Androcles: Now that’s funny!

Lysistrata: I have at least 15 demerits to my name, you know.

Coryo: Physical Education hates me! And delusional Dean Highbottom hates me!

Sejanus: Dr. Gaul personally banned me from attending her class. And my grades are also sh*t.

Gaius: Don’t look at me. I’m just the class clown, bro.

Diana: And honestly, Clemensia’s the only student who deserves to be here fair and square. But as for the rest, let’s just say, we used other means.😈

Lepidus: What other means?!

Felix: Mr. Malmsey, not to be rude, but I have to know, who told these lies to you?

Lepidus: Your Dean told me-

Casca: I swear it wasn’t me!

Lepidus: Right. So just for the record, you’re all confessing, just now, on LIVE TV, and in front of me, that not one of you is a top performing student at The Academy?!

Felix: Unfortunately, yes.

Festus: Never was and never will be.

Lepidus: So you all have demerits?

Festus: My demerit count is 92 and counting!😀

Lysistrata: Shut it, Creed! You’re not suppose to say that on TV.

Felix: Yeah! What will the rest of Panem think of us now?!

Festus: Panem is thinking about us?

Coryo: Since when?

Lepidus: But seriously, how the heck did all of you become our official mentors then?

Felix: Ravinstill Nepotism!

Androcles: My mama blackmailed my way into that list, sweetheart!

Coryo: Easy. I just pretended to be Dean Highbottom’s dead boyfriend and persuaded him to add me on that list while he was drunk.

Casca: Crassus, my love, why did you betray me again?! I was super drunk!😭

Sejanus: Just ask my father. His money don’t jiggle jiggle. It folds.

Lysistrata: I just gave our Dean a free but fake morphling prescription.

Casca: That was fake?!

Livia: My mama threatened Highbottom with a fake tax evasion allegation.

Juno: I’m literally ✨Old Money Capitol Royalty✨.

Palmyra: Food poisoning.

Lepidus: Can you elaborate on that?

Palmyra: No.

Florus: Simple. The Ring twins and I just asked Urban and Io to hack the Dean’s personal computer and change the final list of Mentors before the day of the announcement.

Io: It was dangerous.

Diana: But it was worth it.

Urban: True. And to be fair, I was already on that list.

Apollo: Whatever you say, Math Freak.

Pup: My father just used his military connections while I was busy sleeping.

Persephone: My papa threatened to eat the Dean.

Dennis: I just convinced one of my professors to let me in.

Lepidus: How?!

Dennis: Do you want to receive a horse head before going to bed?

Lepidus: No.

Gaius: I just told another “your mama” jokes to one of the School Board Officials.

Lepidus: That’s it?

Gaius: Yeah. What more can you ask?

Domitia: My papa gave Dr. Gaul 200 chickens and 20 dairy cows.

Arachne: My mama promised the Dean and the whole faculty members a free vacation getaway this summer.

Iphigenia: I kid you not, my crazy papa threatened to destroy the food industry if I didn’t get in.

Vipsania: Clearly, I just got in because my aunt (Professor Sickle) threatened to throw the Dean out of a window if I wasn’t on the list.

Festus: Honestly, I just strolled into Heavensbee Hall, crashed the ceremony uninvited, sat down on one of those fancy “Mentors only” seats, and everybody just accepted it.

Lepidus: So you just illegally got in through sheer dumb luck?

Festus: Well, the odds are always in my favor, Leppy.

Clemensia: *sighs* So it’s true. I’m the only student who got in by literally doing my best.

Coryo: Yup. That’s right, Clemmie!

Clemensia: Why am I even here? Just to suffer?!😩

Sejanus: How about you, Heavensbee?

Hilarius: I just blackmailed my creepy father to let me in, or else I’ll stop giving him some of my cute and candid photos of Coryo and Felix.

Coryo: What the f*ck, Hilari!

Felix: How the heck did you take my photos without me knowing?!

Coryo: And why give them to your creepy old man?!

Hilarius: None of your business.

Coryo: Hilari, I swear I will literally file a restraining order against your whole family if you keep giving away my cute photos like candy.

Felix: My granduncle will hear about this!😡🔪

Hilarius: Why are you being mean to me?! It’s not my fault you two were born gorgeous!😭

Sejanus: Can I see those cute photos of Coryo?🥺

Lysistrata: Can I sell those photos?

Casca: Can I have one?

Lepidus: What is wrong with all of you?!

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ebroxas72 · 3 years

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A comment I've gotten from a handful of people in the know, has been in regards to how I list the YNFG style game "Gnosis" as a major inspiration for our game Deathbed Lullabye. Alongside Yume Nikki and Majora's Mask. The comment goes something like this: "HOW IN THE HOLY F*CK IS THIS BASED IN ANY WAY OFF OF GNOSIS!?!?! HOW IS YOUR SAD YET COLORFUL GAME BE IN THE SAME ZIP CODE, MUCH LESS SENTENCE AS THE DARK, EDGY, AND EXTREMELY F*CKED UP HORROR GAME GNOSIS?!?!?!" Here is a brief explanation for those asking this question. Let's compare both games premises and basic gameplay structure quickly: Gnosis: "Dialogue-heavy YN-Inspired game about a 37-year-old Riot cop who had a bad running and is now dying on a pile of garbage in a back alley, barely cleaning on to life, with the player only being unable to move, with their only options being to save the game or fade in and out of Consciousness the entering the games dream world. with his dream world being extremely messed up with him exploring his past, and the demons of his past that haunt him, with parts of the afterlife Fading Into His dreamscape *looking at you! 10-minute long monologue with Lucifer. Where Lucifer is questioning how you're still alive and not in his domain yet, and granting you demon powers in return*And his dreams exploring themes of mysticism Alchemy and Damnation. (alongside the buckets of gore, blood, and jump scares) "Deathbed Lullabye: "Dialogue-heavy YN-inspired game about a 37-year-old Mexican woman dying from a mysterious terminal illness. With the player unable to do anything with her in her hospital bed besides talking to a visitor, save the game, and exit Consciousness to explore a dream world. with the player only having 7 times they can do this before she dies. With her dream world being all over the place from pretty, to funny, to sad, to beautiful, to only occasionally being REALLY F*CKED UP, (but only for a little bit, and no were even close to levels of Gnosis.)With the dream world exploring her past, and the demons of her past that haunt her, and these demons of her past being things that keep her from moving on, and passing on heaven rather than purgatory. And her dreams explore themes of Catholicism, Aztec mythology. and the interesting dynamic that happens with how the two interact in Mexico." So, In short, Extremely similar premise and gameplay structures. WIDELY WIDELY WIDELY different executions of said similar premises, and gameplay structures. Thank you Gnosis for Inspiring me when making our game. And making me want to Cry, Puke, Make me want to Punch my PC screen when you did the stupid F*ckin' jumpscare with the hands grabbing the screen. And overall freakin' the F*ck out of me. Your jump scares made it so Teicuh would walk lol. (Side note Gnosis is good! I liked the game. I kind of recommend it. The “kinda” comes from it Easily making my “top 5 Most f*cked up, and sad Horror games I have ever played.” Above a lot of the triple A horror games. I don't recommend it to anybody who is faint of heart about horror games or just really really messed up subject matter)

#Deathbed Lullabye #DBL #ynfg #gnosis (game)#yume nikki fan game

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colourful-void · 4 years

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some ace attorney ramblings after finishing edgeworths trial before i go back to trying to do episode 5. (started new save on different console, will need to replay everything to get up there again)

when Mia dies, Phoenix essentially becomes Maya’s new older sister, you can’t change my mind on that it’s what happened

phoenix just took over the law office. he won two trials, one of which he was on trial for, and now he owns an office that hardly takes cases.

phoenix struggles to make rent and seemingly only has one job, which is this, and has taken like,, 4 cases and he only got paid for half. He didn’t get paid for Larry’s case, the second case was Maya’s/His so i doubt he’s gotten paid for that, Powers totally paid, and considering that Edgeworth paid Maya’s bail I’m pretty sure he would pay pheonix for his work, but that’s still really funny to imagine happening.

“stop slamming against your desk” *slams desk* ‘whoops”

“oBJECTION!” ... “mr edgeworth what?” “i was hoping to come up with something while i was objecting! i did not!”

at some point someone is going to slam their hands against the desks and break it, and it’s probably going to be edgeworth

“bro you are hiding a bullet in your shoulder, let me just lift this beep beep metal detctor i got up to your f-ckin arm”

is there any reason pheonix doesn’t have a drivers license or did he just never get to it?? he has the time he hardly ever takes cases.

concept: pheonix can’t ride his f-cking bike to court for whatever reason, resulting in edgeworth having to drive him because he’s prosecuting. it’s an akward ride

bet someones written that, or i hope so at least

Maya thinks that asking the fire deparment to spray her with a hose is a good idea and i would’ve loved to see how that went

*ghost noises* oooo theres another bullet~~~ ooooooo it doesnt matter how it got there~~~~ ooooo keeep pressing him~~~~~ oooo ghost noises~~~~~~~~

i thought mia was pronouced ‘mai-a’ and then maya showed up and i realized i was wrong

i remember at one point maya sayign she wanted something and pheonix saying that she should save up her allowance, which was funny but then i started thinkin. Maya doesn’t have parents or caretakers afaik, so theres rlly no one to give her allowance????

on that note where does Maya sleep???? she doesn’t go back to the mountains every night, right/???? does she sleep in the office???

i guess the logical answer is she stays with pheonix now which is cute

still wanna know who supposdly gives maya allowance

maybe pheonix which is cute

pheonix voice: i wanted to reconnect with my childhood friend but now my mentors dead and i have a little sister and a law office, i guess.

pheonix voice: dammit my sister is gone.

the court is so freaking rowdy like pheonix just has to breath and everyones like ‘oh oh sh-t oh f-ck better yell’

* slams gavel * order! order! shut the f-ck up!

“Objection!” “on what grounds?” “the defendant is a little b-tch.” “...” “objection sustained.”

alright enough ramblin for now

#ace attorney #my mind is a mess of thoughts about ace attorney

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fellowstrangetownappreciator · 3 years

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Well, that was cold

I have mod that makes diseases actually dangerous. (actually several of them and they’re all listed here on Pleasant Sims’ modlist)

The first rotation? Everything’s fine. The only one who fell ill was John Burb and he, as a family Sim, was able to soup himself to health in no time.

The second rotation... Ajaj Loner got sick.

With cold.

I was like, “I know flu is pretty dangerous with this mod but cold should be fine, right? I mean, I used to have it four times a year. So glad it’s not flu!”

I thought I was lucky.

I wasn’t.

After Ajaj’s turn ended, he was free to wander around and spread the cold everywhere.

Because they have chemistry and she was on a prowl, I even had Nina Caliente seduce Ajaj. She got the cold but I was like whatever, she’s a strong quasi-alien, running nose for a few days won’t kill her!

How fatally wrong I was I realized during a vacation that Nina went on with her sister and Ajaj. She was just chilling, sleeping in her hotel room, when all of the sudden, Grim Reaper!

You sure, Dina?

Nina was dead. Dead from the cold. And she was pregnant, no less!

I reloaded because it was on a vacation and Nina was the only playable Sim, so I was quite worried what would become of the grave. I managed to get her home and moved Chloe Curious in, so that someone can eventually plead for her. She was lucky the second time around and survived. Chloe got infected but survived as well.

But we had an epidemic on our hands now. Ajaj and Nina have been quite successful generously sharing their cold all across the hood and I failed to keep track of who has it.

Still, I thought it wasn’t so bad. I didn’t understand the scale, I was still thinking that it was just Ajaj, Consort Capp and the Pleasants.

Again, I was wrong.

When I got in the rotation to the Capps (the Capps 1), everyone was infected. I was still optimistic, though, because we were talking about a household where 2/4 Sims are Family and one is a Family Secondary, they can bathe in the soup!

The teens ate their soup and survived.

Consort died that night. He was due to die at the end of their round anyway but because he didn’t do so of old age, his grandchildren received no bonus inheritance.

The only one who gained something from that was Olive Specter who was delighted to see Consort, her crush, perish, so she could finally raise him as a zombie.

Unfortunately I couldn’t find a screenshot of her actually raising him, so here’s at the very least Olive walking menacingly to work.

Anyway, moving onto the Capps again (the Capps 2, Goneril edition), things looked bleak. Goneril was pregnant and she and all the kids were infected. Albany was immediately called to action to generate enough soup but the house devolved into utter chaos. Everybody had their soup but just as they recovered, they got infected again!

Ok, I was thinking, Consort was quite old and fragile. Nina must’ve had the cold for a long time, given she was on a vacation. There’s no way the kids are gonna die on the first day they got infected. They had the soup, so I’ll send them to beds, so they can get a good-night sleep and enough rest.

Nope.

Ariel, a child, died in her sleep.

Nobody was able to get to her in time to plead for her.

While I was contemplating an in-character way of resurrection, Desdemona, a young teen, died in her sleep just about two hours after her sister.

Again, nobody was fast enough.

Luckily, Miranda was already in college and she was roommates with Ophelia Nigmos, who was in possession of a genie lamp she was safeguarding from Olive. Hearing about the tragedy that befell her friend’s family, moved by the death of a little girl and her not much older sister, Ophelia the Family Sim offered Miranda the lamp on the spot.

Miranda rushed home to drop off the lamp and then ran off so she doesn’t get infected. Well, she did anyway but since I haven’t played the college Sims yet, I don’t know of her fate.

Hal made a good use of the lamp. He rolled the wants to resurrect both his sisters and that’s exactly what he did.

He triumphantly finished making the wishes...

And dropped dead.

Another young soul succumbed to cold.

But! Since there was still a wish left and his sisters were back alive, Desdemona swiftly brought him back.

Ariel’s and Hal’s resurrections were perfect.

Desdemona’s was faulty, so her personality got reversed.

But as long as they’re alive and preferably not zombies, everything will do.

The Capps were all cured! Hooray!

Wait. Not all Capps. There was still Regan’s branch and, predictably, they were all infected. And this time, there was no Family Sim in sight.

The only non-infected Sim in the family was a little toddler. The poor, poor child was in for a life-long trauma.

Kent went quick and quiet the first night of their round. Regan fortunately recovered. Cornwall did too. They had a very lucky start of the round all together, I may add. Kent’s tragic death was followed by Regan’s demotion that lead to her subsequent want to quit her job (...and she was the only one who was making any significant money), then Cornwall set the house on fire while cooking breakfast, then he got fired.

Poor thing. First got house-fired, then job-fired.

Regan’s LTW was to reach the top of the Law career, so she got herself a new job there. On her first day, she got promoted!

And she brought home a friend! Sweet!

No... nooooo...

It was Ajaj F*ckin’ Loner.

Both Regan and Cornwall got infected before you could say “act your surname and social-distance, you jerk!”

Cornwall died almost immediately. Unfortunately, Regan was asleep and failed to get up and ambush the Grim Reaper in time.

On the bright side, she recovered!

So I watch her go to work, the nanny arrives to baby-sit the toddler, everything seems to finally have settled down.

But then I spot an unexpected movement in the house.

It’s Titania Summerdream. Who let her in? I have no idea.

It would be quite sweet of her to check on her friend Regan after she lost two family members and to help with her young daughter.

If... if she didn’t have the fricking cold!

Regan returned from work and I rushed to have her send Titania away.

Of damn course she didn’t go before giving the cold to Regan.

Now it was the third time Regan got infected and there were no other family members to take care of the toddler if she dies. It was very suspenseful. I decided to use extreme measures and I teleported Albany in, made him selectable and had him cook the soup.

Instead of that, he proceeded to bicker with Regan.

If he got re-infected, I swear...

Anyway, after a three tries or so, Regan got her soup and Albany was on his merry way away.

What a relief! I sent Regan to sleep, trusting the soup to do its magic. The next morning her needs all looked great! No notification yet but I was sure it’s gonna arrive any second. When suddenly...

Yeap, she died.

Regan Capp died the way she lived. Paying her family’s bills.

I used Simblender again to quickly move in Hal. He was there in time to plead for Regan!

And for the first time in the Capp household, he actually made it! He pleaded!

And... and... lost.

So I had him stay to take care of the toddler until their round was over. Then I moved them both back with Goneril’s branch.

At the very least young Ione, the genius toddler with maxed Logic skill, got something resembling a birthday party with her cousin and his boyfriend Alexander Goth.

Given that Montys had their losses as well, the cold has already taken out much of the adult population of Veronaville.

The only two adults left (not counting fresh elders Albany and Goneril) in Veronaville were in fact the Summerdreams who were extremely lucky and with an abundance of soup, they survived.

To be completely honest, I’m very happy with the mod. I tend to play large hoods and although it tends to be rather tragic, the occasional epidemic of cold trims the population down a bit without me killing anybody off and it gives the game an additional bit of challenge and randomness.

...or maybe I’m just a sh*tty person to my Sims.

Bonus screenshots of the Strangetown cold outbreak:

Vidcund Curious spent two nights sleeping in a chair in his children’s bedroom because he was afraid they’re going to die from the cold in their sleep and wanted to be there to plead for them. In the end it actually happened, he pleaded and managed to save his daughter.

The Smiths had to be unfortunately visited by the Therapist. PT9 died on the day he was supposed to die of old age but hours prior, he became yet another victim of the cold. And it was very unlucky, since it meant no inheritance and by the Watcher, Jenny and their 5 kids could definitely use it. They were completely broke.

But not everything was morbid and tragic!

Lazlo rolled quite the unexpected want to get married to his girlfriend, Cassandra Goth. They weren’t engaged, she wasn’t pregnant, he’s not a Family secondary, and the date they were on wasn’t even in the stage Sims usually roll engagement wants, he simply rolled it out of the blue. And of course I went with it! (Cassandra had recently divorced Don, rolling the wish to remarry almost immediately.)

The only family in the hood that could technically mass-produce medicine so that not everyone is dependent on the soup, the Beakers, of course didn’t. Why would they risk their hides, toying with the Mysterious Disease, when they didn’t have to? Instead, they social-distanced and spent the rotation raking in promotions and taking care of their army of children. (Loki kept rolling wants to get abducted and ARC wasn’t kind to them either. But with Loki being Family secondary and Circe leaving most of the parenting on him anyway, I don’t think they mind.)

Note the alien toddler, the second youngest child. He has 10 Nice points. That’s 4 points more than all 5 of his siblings and his parents combined. He’s gonna have a rough childhood, the poor thing.

Jill Smith managed to get nibbled on by the pack leader just in time, a few days before going to college. She’s thrilled by her new wolf-y powers! And regardless of what her mother says, she knows the fur goes with her school uniform just perfectly!

Rachel Pleasant, the youngest offspring of Daniel that he knows about (the second youngest overall), aged up into a child! And judging by the look on her face, she already knows how much of a mess her family is.

Not even being brought back from the dead made Desdemona Capp immune to the Summerdream charm. Bottom, the young Romance Sim, invited her girlfriend to hang out in their hot tub. It was an afternoon to remember for both of them.

Local ageing general married a successful young athlete, Kristen Loste. Unfortunately for everyone attending the wedding, the bride’s former roommate Chloe Curious decided that flirting with her literally the next interaction after Kristen said, “I do.” was a smart idea. No need to add that the wedding cake was left to rot forgotten, never cut. It was a sad wedding cake but even though it started to stink around two hours after the wedding, it still lasted longer than the marriage.

And far away in La Fiesta Tech, two estranged siblings were talking things out and healing their relationship.

Now I lost this hood (again) and started a new one, so the next gameplay post will probably feature the same characters in completely different circumstances and nothing is going to make sense but... what does anyway?

#the sims 2 #simbrl #strangetown #veronaville #pleasantview #gameplay #ts2 #the sims

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takerfoxx · 3 years

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Jurassic Park 4: Doki Idol Live Festival!

magic5ball submitted:

Remember how you asked me about my idea for a Jurassic Park sequel? Well, here you go:

The two velociraptors stood outside a pastel colored town house in Hokkaido prefecture, Japan. If any passerbys thought that was weird, they certainly didn’t show it. Probably because the raptors were wearing fedoras and fake mustaches, so they looked like humans. Also they had guns. Very cool, very intimidating mobster guns. A tommy gun and a sawed-off shotgun, respectively.

You needed guns, to survive Shinzo Abe’s little empire of vice and socialized medical care.

“So this is the place, huh?” muttered the velociraptor carrying the sawed-off shotgun. His thick Brooklyn accent hung in the air like concrete. “Kinda… frillier than I was expecting.”

“It better be.” Replied his companion, who sounded like your racist conservative uncle trying to impersonate that one cool guy from ‘The Godfather’ (You know, the one with the mustache who was played by Robert de Niro). “We hadda kill a whole lotta people to get this hellhole.”

Sawed-off shotgun licked his non-existent lizard lips

“But hey. That airplane stewardess tasted mighty fine goin-“

“Oh, for f*ck’s sake, would ya stop thinkin’ with your stomach and help me with this f*ckin’ knob!” cried tommy gun, trying to work the doorknob best he could with his raptor claws, which, in all honesty, wasn’t much, because raptor claws are terrible at operating things meant for human fingers. Little did he know, the door was a ‘pull’, not a ‘push.

At least he didn’t have to wait long before someone unlocked the door from the other side: another velociraptor, this one a bit on the short side. And p!ssed. Very, very p!ssed. You could tell he was the cool one because he wore an eyepatch over one eye. An eyepatch with a Captain Underpants logo on it.

“Didn’t your parent’s ever teach you idiots about using the doorbell?! I was just about to enjoy lunch with my beautiful wife and you-!“

He paused, recognizing the two figures facing him.

“Well, well, well” Said tommy gun, cocking his weapon “If it isn’t SWEET JOHN HAMMOND’S BALLSACK WHAT THE F*CK AM I LOOKING AT?!”

For the cool raptor was dressed in a gothic Lolita maid outfit, complete with a bonnet and penny loafers. Under his arm he carried a human sized pillow depicting what appeared to be a blonde floozy with massive tits.

“Oh this? This is Mami Tomoe, my beautiful wife.”

“WHAT THE F*CK!?!?” Tommy gun pulled out a flask off orange Fanta from his butthole and drank the whole thing in one go. He did NOT have time for this homosexual weeaboo nonsense! Still, he and shotgun hadn’t left a mountain of corpses the exact height and width as Mt. Fuji behind them. Too many to go back to Isla Nublar empty handed. Er, clawed. Because they were dinosaurs. Who have claws.

Shotgun took a deep breath. “What the Boss means to say is, ‘May we take refuge in this fine establishment?’”

Cool raptor opened his mouth to reveal a pistol he’d hidden there. And by hidden I mean replaced his tongue with it.

“You know, for all crap you guys used to give me in the past, I oughta pump you full of lead right here and now. Buuutttt… the lady of the house is present, and I’m not in the mood to create more work on her end. So come on in! You’re just in time for lunch.”

Lest they attract unneeded attention, the three dinosaurs hopped inside.

. . .

Lunch was omurice boba tea with a bottle of teriyaki sauce on the side. It was just boba tea, but the boba had been replaced by omurice because F-Bomb hated the flavor of boba, which he likened to rabbit crap. The teriyaki sauce was teriyaki sauce.

It was the most racist thing shotgun had ever eaten.

“Well, now that you jerks have gotten a taste of my sloppy seconds, I suppose some introductions are in order. You’ve already met my lovely wife” Cool raptor gestured to the body pillow seated next to him “So that leaves you two. Mami, meet A-Hole and D-Bag. A-Hole’s got the tommy gun, D-Bag is ridin’ her sawed off shotgun, as always. They’re old… acquaintances of mine.”

“He.” Corrected D-Bag. “I’ve been using he/him pronouns six months now.”

“Well that’s an improvement. Now instead of bein’ the Boss’ side B!tch literally, you’re just his b!tch figuratively!”

“Well screw you too, F-Bomb!” laughed the boss. “An’ speakin’ of screwing, what’s with the fruity get up? You a prostitute now or something?”

“Even better! This might surprise you, but I’ve got legitimate work now. This here’s my uniform, my uniform for MILF TIDDIES!”

A-Hole chugged his entire bottle of teriyaki sauce in one go, lest his mind implode from the sheer stupidity of that sentence.

“The Hell’s a milf tiddie!?”

“Only the best freakin’ maid café in Hoikaido, hookers!”

He gestured to a wall, covered in hundreds of photos of cute floozies dressed like they were attending a vampire’s funeral. Among them was a photo of F-Bomb in his drag, serving a deep fried hot dog to some elderly Japanese dude.

“As you can see, yours truly is serving Japan’s national desert to none other than 57th Prime Minister of Japan Shinzo Abe!”

“Hold it up. Youse been hobnobbing it with politicians?!”

“I wish! You’re thinking of Shinzo Abe, 57th Prime Minister of Japan. This guy is his twin brother. Still pretty sweet though. We DID win a Grammy for that, after all.”

A-Holes eyes bulged out of his scaly raptor head.

“YOUSE WON A GRAMMY FOR THAT?!”

“Dang right! Milf Tiddies has won sixteen Grammys since I started working there!” He pulled out a piece of paper from his pocket. A very special piece of paper, if the six holes punched into it were any indication. “Did you know that if you win ten Grammys in a row, they give you a free orphan? That’s how the wife and I got our glorious daughter, Lil’ Nagisa!”

F-Bomb pulled a faded photo out of his wallet. A photo showing himself, his pillow wife, and a smaller body pillow of a ten-year-old moeblob wearing a Green Bay Packers cheesehead helmet.

“So youse couldn’t even conceive your own kid?” Inquired D-Bag sexily. He was munching his omurice slowly, so F-Bomb knew he was being serious.

“Are you implying I have sex with my own wife, you sick freak?! I’m a weeaboo, not some degenerate anime fanboy! Get it straight!” He instinctively cocked the pistol in his throat. It was awesome as hell.

In response, D-Bag pumped his shotgun. Loudly.

“Permission to put the sick freak out of his misery, Boss?”

“Firstly, don’t call me Boss when we’re not having anal sex. Second, no can do, my spicy lover. We need F-Bomb alive.”

F-Bomb heard all of this even though A-Hole whispered it, but he pretended not to make A-Hole feel clever.

D-Bag mumbled about how the Boss was lucky he was so mind blowing in the sack, otherwise he would have left the relationship long ago. The sack in this case being a really kinky sex dungeon. Like really kinky. So kinky even Donald Trump wouldn’t go within a mile of it. D-Bag had almost died of autoerotic asphyxiation more times than I’ve gone to the bathroom in my lifetime. That’s why he was the smartest dinosaur out of the three of them. Now where was I again?

Anyway, F-Bomb interrogated

“Alright guys, what’s the deal? I know folks who come to this socialized medical care infested hellhole, and they don’t come here just to eat omurice boba tea. You WANT me for something.”

He cocked his mouth-pistol again. Sparks flew all over the carpet, which was made of alpaca fur so it didn’t catch fire.

A-Hole scandalously kept his cool.

“It’s about Isla Nublar.”

The second those words left A-Hole’s lips, F-Bomb escorted his wife out of the kitchen, but leaned her against the kitchen door, because that’s what she would have wanted.

“Well what about it? I told ya guys, I’m done with that dump.”

“They’re puttin’ the screws on us, F-Bomb. Making us pay for eating those tourists back in the nineties.”

“And what makes you think I care? Like I said, I’m done with that place. I got a wife and kid now.”

“But F-Bomb, doesn’t the Park mean ANYTHING to ya!? What about the time we ate that park ranger that called you a girl? ‘Better than sex’ I recall you saying.”

“Nice try, but I’m not exactly in the mood to get misgendered again. Don’t you guys got any ideas that don’t involve me?”

“As a matter of fact, yours truly had this really spectacular one!”

D-Bag did a hand gesture wherein he constantly crossed his dinosaur claws across his throat rapidly in quick succession. A-Hole, being very smart, knew this meant he should continue, loudly enough so that everyone in the prefecture could hear.

“It was called ‘Trump Ballz’. We’d harvest Donald Trump’s testicles, see, and sell them to the highest bidder, so they could do whatever people do with lopped off testicles. I’m not one to judge. It was a terrific idea. I know because when I told my best friend Donald Trump about it, he said, ‘A-Hole, this is an incredible idea. Absolutely terrific! This is probably the best idea in America! You are very smart, very intelligent dinosaur! I oughta buy you a prostitute!’ Of course, we didn’t realize that Trump’s ballz don’t grow back when you lop them off. Did you know that by the way? Human testicles don’t grow back-“

F-Bomb cocked the pistol inside his throat gain, getting the Boss to shut up. This was probably the most heroic thing anyone had ever done in the history of the universe. He also asked a question:

“SO WHAT THE HECK DOES THIS HAVE TO DO WITH ME?!”

A-Hole vomited a severed arm and a pamphlet onto the table.

“EVERYTHING, ya WEEB trash!”

The pamphlet was for something called the Doki Idol Live Fest- DILF, for short. F-Bomb was no stranger to the DILF, but they had parted ways years ago. Six, to be exact, when he had buried Nico Yazawa’s still screaming corpse by the side of the highway. And neither was he stranger to the prize.

It looked like a beer and soda drinking baseball cap, but only to complete idiots who didn’t know crap about the Idol Life.

And F-Bomb wasn’t one of those people, er dinosaurs.

“THE MCGUFFIN OF SIN?!”

“Dam* straight! And like it or not, youse the only one with enough idol know-how to help us win it! Thing’s worth, like, a zillion dollars.”

A zillion in this case was equivalent to half a million. Still, isn’t that impressive?

F-Bomb stuck his nose in his omurice and snorted, a common intimidation tactic among velociraptors. I know because I read it in the Scientific American.

“Sorry, guys, but even with that on the line, no can do. I’m DONE with the Idol Life, any I’m not letting you filthy casuals drag me back in.” He cocked the pistol in his throat. “NOW SCRAM!”

A-Hole and D-Bag jumped out a window, so they could get the jump on a feral dog humping its’ owner. Nobody realized they were dinosaurs because of their fake mustaches, so it looked like a pair of mobsters were eating a puppy.

When they were gone, F-Bomb pranced to the bathroom, which was filled with plush alpacas he had collected over the years. So many, in fact, the bathroom did not meet OSHA compliance. Which was why F-Bomb had made it an independent nation state, only to realize that OSHA didn’t apply to him anyway, since he lived in Japan.

He had felt really stupid after that, but at least he got his own country out of it.

Anyway, he vomited sixteen liters of blood into the sink, for F-Bomb had a secret: he was dying. Back when he was a fetus in an egg in a lab on some island in the Caribean, he’d become addicted to the illegal street drug known as WEEB, and frequent use had poisoned his lungs. The doctors had given him Socialized Medical Care and four more years to live. The WEEB had taken eighty years off his life. Socialized Medical Care had borrowed his lawnmower and never given it back.

But F-Bomb also had a dream: he and his wife were going to build their own maid café, and it would be even better than MILF Tiddies. He’d already picked a title: DILF Tiddies, and it was going to be the greatest food-selling establishment in the history of Japan. Omurice boba tea was going to go global. But he’d never get the funds on time, not on his meager salary. Unless…

His beautiful wife greeted him as he exited the bathroom.

“Get a pen and some razor blades, sweetgums. I’ve got a letter to send.”

. . .

The message arrived in the neck of a mailman’s severed head. This is the traditional way velociraptors send letters to each other. I read it in a book.

D-Bag didn’t see the letter, but the look on A-Hole’s face told him everything.

“What’d I tell ya, D-Bag? Like I always say, when you’re dino you’re dino all the way, till youse dead in the ground or youse come out as gay!”

“Yeah, we really need to update those lyrics.”

End Chapter 1

...I cannot for the life of me decide if this is the greatest thing I've ever seen or the worst, but it at the very least had me staring speechless at my computer screen for a long time.

#submission #jurassic park #puella magi madoka magica #pmmm #well then

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kayzerovii · 3 years

Text

So a Fanart Of White Diamond from Steven Universe

(It's took me 5h with my horrible computer that work 10% of the time the 90% left it literally dies)

I wanted to try something more... Semi-realistic ??? Idk what.

And for the people who ask me how did I do that I'll be honest...

I don't have a f*ckin' idea

So I just started S.U few days ago and I like it very much but lil fun Fact I didn't see her yet XD

So maybe I draw her a little too creepy or not idk.

I draw her like that cause' it's how I see her for now

Anyway hope you like it

Some hashtags:

#drawing #art #artstyle #fanart #white diamond #steven universe #steven universe fanart #idk

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randomfandomz · 4 years

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GET READY FOR A LOT OF HUSK HEADCANNONS

Im not sorry–

Depressed as f*ck so he doesnt have the modivation to take care of himself

He drinks mainly to forget, and to releive stress

Not only that but he H A T E S water(not as much as Baxter does, but he still avoids it like the plauge)

He never showers until he absolutely has to

Like his fur is always matted and alchohol scented

And he thinks licking himself clean like non-demon cats do is absolutely out of the question, it is gross and undignified, he doesnt want to lick himself and water makes his fur feel heavy and cold and he w i l l argue with you about this

He hates having fur. He just hates it. Its hard to take care of and things get stuck in it, it gets caught in things and just hhhh h h h H H - NO

Will straight up refuse to shower until Charlie makes him

Everyone in the hotel knows about shower day

The day when they make Husk take a shower because e w g r o s s o l d m a n -

Baxter somewhat sympathizes with him about his hatred of water

Not like he actually shows it or does anything to help him though- because 1) Bax really doesnt give a flying f*ck, he just wants to do science and this doesnt concern science so he couldnt care less, and 2) He doesnt wanna speak up because s o c i a l a n x i e t y . S o c i a l i n t e r a c t i o n ? N o t h a n k y o u .

Hes literally a cat, so he hates water with a burning passion

Husk's self image is kinda... ehhhhhh- I mean, its not like he really is that bad looking, if anything he looks pretty damn cool, but he honestly finds himself pretty unattractive. "The fur and wings d o n t h e l p "

Doesnt care if you call him old unless youre trying to be offensive; Hes proud of his age and experience

Even though he acts like an old man(well, he kinda is, but-) hes actually younger than Baxter, Mimzy, Alastor, Angel, and Nifty

Only Vaggie and Crymini are younger than him

When Husk first arrived at the hotel he didnt really wanna interact with anyone; New places kind of stress him out, so it took a long time for him to adjust and not snap at every little thing

Dont get me wrong, hes still a pissy alchoholic^tm, but the anger is less serious/genuine and more just because thats how he is

Husk fought in the vietnam war, and he attempted(and failed) suicide multiple times after the war until he was eventually beaten to death outside of a bar

He turned to alchoholism and gambling as a coping mechanism

Husk suffers from PTSD(Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), along with the obvious alchoholism and gambling addiction

He is very salty/sad that he's a war vet but died in a bar fight, and wouldn't be remembered for his fighting but rather for being beaten to death in a bar while trying to drink away the feelings he had about not being welcomed home because of the way the media portrayed him and his fellow soldiers that fought in Vietnam

Upon learning that Husk is a vietnam war vet(he mentioned it while drunk off his ass- more than usual) one patron who attended the hotel for a short time told him "Welcome home doc!". Husk was surprised, as he had come to terms with the idea that he would never be thanked or welcomed for his services, but he did make sure to be maybe a bit less pissy to that particular guest. He will never forget them. It meant more to him than he would like to admit.

((I can't really think of a better reason as to why Husk would bring it up, but having seen one or two instances of someone saying "welcome home" to Vietnam war vets, I really wanted to add this. The "Welcome home doc" thing was me referencing a specific instance of this ive seen. Im so sorry if I'm wrongly portraying this in anyway, I tried to do enough research first before typing this part out, but I just wanted to point out that I tried my best to be respectful while talking about the subject.))

Moving on- L A S E R P O I N T E R S

One time Angel was just casually messing around with a laser pointer, out of boredom or something

HUSK'S RESPONSE WAS IMMEDIATE

HE WILL CHASE THAT RED DOT TO THE ENDS OF THE GODDAMN EARTH

"That DAMN RED DOT where the FUCK did iT gO!?"

He HATES that he does this, but he really cannot help it

Being a cat demon, and being Husk, his hunt and kill instinct is through the roof(hunt and kill instinct is why cats chase laser pointers btw)

Was VERY pissy for the next few weeks after this incident

Husk will purr involuntarily whenever someone pets him or strokes his fur

He WILL murder anyone who attempts to pet him or make him purr without consent(*COUGH COUGH* ANGEL *COUGH*)

Same goes for the wings DO NOT TOUCH THE WINGS, JUST DONT-

In his room, Husk's bed is literally a mound of blankets and pillows inside a box

Even he needs to get warm and comfortable after a long day

He never lets anyone in his room

Like n e v e r

Angel snuck in one night- Husk's half asleep drunken a*s shoved him out and yelled at him, waking up practically all the hotel staff and a few guests

In his defense, Angel, upon seeing the sleeping Husk, scratched behind his ears. Husk started to purr, but then snapped to somewhat conciousness, and realized what the f*ck was going on-

Yes, Husk is v e r y defensive

Give him a compliment? He wont accept it under any circumstances. He will probably be flustered and claim that the other is either lying or just kissing up to him

"You know you dont have to kiss my a*s to ask me something, right? The fuck do you want?"

Charlie honestly finds his reaction to compliments very sad

Has a kind of "well ya didnt need to point it out" attitude towards insults

Alastor insults him with the worst names in the book? He accepts it and couldnt give less f*cks

Even if its someone either than Alastor insulting him, usually even if he acts offended and p*ssed off, somewhere in his mind he just accepts it

Usually Alastor is the one insulting him, but in a "best friend rights" kind of way

He likes being creative when it comes to colorful language

"Look out to my sea of f*cks, and see how it is barren"

Doesnt have a "soft spot" for kids like Angel, but doesnt mind lessening the swearing a bit and doing a few magic tricks for the occasional child that somehow found their way to the hotel

He HISSES

If Husk is hissing at you you better f*ckin rUN-

He usually refrains from hissing- its part of him rebelling against his cat-like nature, but if he is openly hissing at you it means he is at his wits-end and is honestly P * S S E D .

sERIOUSLY, F*CKING R U N -

Crymini has a blog documenting all the cat-like things Husk does, and she sometimes does the classic "THIS IS A HUSK IN ITS NATURAL HABITAT" or "LETS SEE HOW THE KITTY REACTS TO THIS NEXT THING" bit, and Husk honestly finds it insulting as f*ck

Crymini pranked Husk with a cucumber(you know how cats on the internet are terrified of them) and Husk was actually scared of it, and he ran up a f*cking tree and wouldnt come down for a solid hour, partly put of legitimate fear, and partly out of spite from seeing the slightly guilty look on Crymini's face after the first 20 minutes of him hiding up there

Being a cat demon, alchohol is actually slightly toxic to him, and he is prone to alchohol poisoning. He usually drinks beer, which has low ammount of ethanol(5-7%)[ethanol is what makes alchohol so toxic to cats]

Baxter has a spray bottle to use on Husk if he is being particularly stubborn or bothersome. Charlie sometimes uses her own spray bottle for similar purposes, but she usually says something like "Bad kitty! No!" Along with it to tease him. Husk finds it humiliating and hates when his fur is wet, so surprisingly the spray bottle thing usually works.

He is demi-panromantic and asexual

H A T E S being touched, like under any circumstances

"The last time I voluntarily made physical contact with another being was in 1970 and it was while I was loosing a bar fight. It was also the day I was beaten to death and setenced to hell."

Bonus:

Angel: Hey kitty~! Wanna cuddle~?

Husk: The last time I voluntarily made physical contact with another being was in 1970 and it was while I was loosing a bar fight.

Angel: Oh really? *snickers* And how'd that work out for ya'?

Husk: Well, it was also the day I was beaten to death and put in hell. So I dunno. You tell me.

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