What Once Was Mine
Chapter 3 - Shifting Dynamics
Genre: Childhood friends, Eventual Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, Love corner/love triangle, love rivals, Series. Not all chapters will be proofread!!
Warnings: 18+, mdni, mentions of sex and alcohol consumption, additional warnings will be added to individual chapters as needed.
Additional tags: love triangle, hangovers, flirting
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It was your overwhelming urge to pee that surged you into consciousness, however as soon as you were awake enough you became acutely aware of the overwhelming nausea washing over you. Good lord, how much did you drink last night?
“Oh god.” You said bolting upright, clamping your hand tightly over your mouth and squeezing your eyes shut, trying to block out the urge to vomit as you took deep, slow breaths. It took a moment but the sensation eased and you were able to take in your surroundings… Where were you anyway?
It was dark but you could tell this was someone's room, did you hook up with someone? No, Jisung wouldn't have let you leave the karaoke room without him, and even if you did manage to slip out to hook up with someone, the person in question would have been here with you. Not to mention you most likely would have still been naked from the night before, and were most definitely wearing clothes. You weren't wearing your clothes though, they must belong to the person who's room you're in. The shirt hung loosely on your frame, as did the shorts and you could smell cologne coming from the fabric. If you had to guess off the clothes alone, this was definitely a guys room.
If only you had your phone, you could call one of the guys and ask them if they knew where the hell you were…
The moment the thought entered your head the door opened and you found yourself relieved to see Changbin.
“Hey, you're up.” He said with a smile, reaching for the light switch.
“Please don't turn on the light.” You begged, pressing the palms of your hands to your eyes due to the light streaming in from behind him.
“Major hangover?” He asked sympathetically, closing the door and making his way to the bed. You only grunted in reply.
“I guess it's a good thing I brought you this then.” He chuckled, pulling your hands from your eyes to hand you a bowl of soup and a bottle of water you didn't realize he even had.
Opening the bottle you eagerly downes the entire thing before turning your attention to the heavenly smelling soup before you. The warm, rich broth was exactly what you needed. Changbin simply sat at the foot of the bed, happy to see you enjoying your meal.
“Soooo, where am I?” you eventually asked, peering up at Changbin.
“My room. I live the closest to the karaoke lounge and we all got a little too drunk last night. I guess Han didn't want to drive all over town just to get us all home and decided to come here.” Changbin said with a shrug of his broad shoulders.
“I can't say I blame him. I know I can get a little hard to control when I drink too much,” you admitted sheepishly, finishing off the rest of the soup. “I usually try to stay somewhat clear headed whenever I go out.” You added, watching as Changbin took the bowl from your lap. “I can't even remember the last time I drank that much.”
“I just hope that means you felt comfortable and were having a fun time.” Changbin said as he stood, making his way to the door.
“Changbin,” you called before he could touch the doorknob. “Uhm… who's clothes am I wearing?” You were hesitant to ask.
“Oh, they're mine. Han said you threw up all over yours.” He replied simply, opening the door and making his way out. “I'll give them back when they're washed.” He added right before he closed the door, leaving you flushed and embarrassed. Thanks a lot Ji.
You gave yourself a few minutes before collecting your composure and slipping out of bed. You still had to pee immensely and you wanted to see how everyone was doing. Upon exiting the bedroom you were greeted by the sight of all the guys, minus Changbin, scattering throughout the living room, all of them in various states of undress.
The only one to really attempt to cover up was Chan, everyone else was simply too hungover or too comfortable with you to care.
“Well good morning to you too.” You said to them as you scanned for the bathroom.
“Down this mini hall that's next to the kitchen, second door.” Jisungs voice called out, already knowing what you were searching for. “If you somehow miss it, you're even more hungover than I thought you'd be and you need to go back to bed.
“Shut up.” You say, frowning at him as he obnoxiously blows you kisses.
It took a bit of concentration to make your way to the bathroom, you were still dizzy and while the food and water helped your headache, you could still feel pressure in your head. Instead of risking a fall in the bathroom you did your best to be fast and were soon making your way back to the living room to settle in next to Felix on one of the two couches.
“Sleep well?” Felix asked, his voice hoarse. You vaguely recalled his scream singing the night before.
“I was less asleep and more unconscious.” You replied.
“Join the club.” Chan cut in as he lay splayed out on the ground, his eyes squeezed shut. “This is why I never drink.”
“Because you're an old man who can't handle his alcohol?” Jisung quipped from the other couch.
“I'd get you if the room wasn't spinning…” Chan grumbled, covering his face with the blanket he pulled off Felix when you walked out.
“If that was the case, would you also put your clothes back on? There's a woman present.” Jisung asked with a sassy tone, causing Chan to scoff.
“You and Felix don't even have pants on!” He cried out defensively, waving a hand between the two.
“Yeah, but we're not just in our tight-ass boxers.” Felix countered.
“Traitor” Chan said, his eyes squinted at Felix with a playful glare. Meanwhile you watched on fondly as the trio bickered.
“Oh! Hey, Ji, where's my stuff?” You asked.
“You mean the clothes you threw up on or-?”
“No, you ass hat. I mean my phone.”
“It's charging in the kitchen.” He replied and you made your way there to collect it. You were surprised to see Changbin washing dishes when you entered.
“Hey, you're not feeling sick?” Your asked him, looking for where Jisung placed your phone to charge.
“Nah, I didn't drink enough to get any kind of hangover. Plus I'm really good at handling my alcohol.” He said with a proud smile, you swear he was puffing his chest with pride.
“Okay then macho man.” You giggled as you walked past him to reach for your phone once you located it. Before you could even turn on the screen, Changbin piped up.
“Hey, Y/N, are- are you dating anyone?” His question made you fumble your phone.
“What?”
“Are you dating anyone?” He repeated, turning off the tap and removing his rubber gloves. “I looked over to the phone pile last night cause I kept seeing a screen lightning up, some guy named Hyunjin kept calling you. I figured he was your boyfriend or something and that he was worried about you.” Changbin looked away as he finished his explanation, rubbing the back of his neck as he leaned against the counter. You couldn't help but notice how he seemed a bit dejected.
“Oh… oh no. I'm not dating anyone, Hyunjin is just one of my best friends. Our families have been close since we were kids is all.”
“Oh. Is that all?” He said, immediately seeming more cheerful, although he kept his eyes to the ground.
“I was really worried there for a second, if he was your boyfriend then I really wouldn't want to upset him.” Changbin tore his eyes from the floor to look at you and you almost missed the bashful tone in his voice when he said, “I know if you were my girlfriend, I'd want to always know if you were okay.”
“O-oh, uh, I…” you didn't know what to say. What did he mean by that? What do you say to that? You didn’t know, all you knew is that you could feel your cheeks flush under his bashful, vulnerable gaze. It was if he was trying to tell you something without actually saying it. Was he implying what you hoped he was?
You didn’t get a chance to answer. Your phone lit up in your hand, catching your attention, and when you looked at the screen Hyunjins name showed. You could see why Changbin thought you two were dating.
You had put him as “Hyunjinnie” in your phone and decorated his name with hearts and stars, you had also given him a customized phone screen for whenever he would call, and his profile picture was a picture you once took when the two of you had gone to the park together and he fell asleep with his head in your lap. Normally you loved seeing your phone screen light up with a special display, just for him, but something about Changbin seeing it made you painfully embarrassed. You couldn't fully understand why.
“Sorry, um, I- I gotta-” you stuttered.
“No, yeah, I'll give you some privacy.” Changbin said, making his way out of the kitchen. However he couldn't help but pick up on how Hyunjin called you “Beautiful” the moment you answered the phone.
○●☆♡☆●○
Plopping down on the couch next to Jisung, Changbin couldn't help but feel a little uneasy. Something Jisung immediately noticed.
“Hey, are you ok?” he asked quietly, pulling his view from the TV to look at his friend.
“Is Y/N dating anyone?” Changbin blurted, tipping his head back to stare at the ceiling, taking Jisung by surprise.
“No, she isn't.” Jisung replied, blinking at Changbin, confused but also hopeful. “Why do you ask?”
“It's just… She told me she wasn't dating anyone, but then this Hyunjin guy called and-”
“Uhg, him.” Jisung said with disgust, rolling his eyes and leaning back into the couch. “So that's who she's talking to right now.”
“You don't like him?” Changbin asked with a lift of his head, looking at Jisung with curiosity.
“No, I think he's a fuckboy and that Y/N could do better. But don't tell her I said that, she loves the guy.”
“So they are a thing.”
“They're just friends.” Jisung said quickly, patting Changbins shoulder. “I'm not gonna lie, things are a little more complicated between them than just a ‘normal friendship’, they've been close since forever, but they're not dating and they're definitely not exclusive. That's all I can say.” Jisung said, holding his hands up.
This seemed to have brought Changbin a modicum of comfort, allowing him to lean in, not wanting Chan or Felix to hear what he was about to ask - although the two were very much subtly eavesdropping.
“Do… would you be okay if I asked her out then? Do you think she'd even say ‘yes’?” Changbin asked nervously. Out of everyone in the room, Changbin knew that Han was the closest to you. Not only did Changbin not want to cause any sort of tension by asking you out, he also figured Han was the best person to ask this question in general.
Outwardly Jisung let only his surprise show, however on the inside he was throwing a full on parade. This was everything he was hoping for coming to reality and he struggled not to jump on Changbins lap and kiss him square on the mouth just for asking about dating you. It was at this moment that Han knew he was going to do everything in his power to help Changbin land a chance at dating you.
“Dude, she'd totally say yes! She's so into you!” Jisung tried to whisper, however he was just a touch too enthusiastic and spoke loudly enough that the two eavesdroppers were able to join in on the conversation.
“Oh, is Changbin finally going to try and shoot his shot?” Felix asked with a grin, “five bucks she turns him down.” He teased, earning a pillow being thrown at his head by Changbin.
“She won't turn you down, I'm sure of it.” Chan said from the floor, giving Changbin an encouraging smile, “When do you plan to ask her?”
“I dunno. I want to make sure the moment's right. I don't want anything getting… in the way.” He mused, his attention drifting to the faint sound of your giggle coming from the kitchen.
“You mean any one.” Jisung muttered with a slight pout.
Changbin opened his mouth to speak but was stopped by Jisung, who had noticed you coming from the kitchen.
“You good?” He asked, seeing you had also grabbed your wallet.
“Yeah, well, no… kinda? I still feel yucky and I appreciate you guys giving me a safe place to sleep and all, but I really just want a hot bath and to be in my own bed.” You admitted candidly.
“I can take you and Han home. If you're feeling sick you probably still shouldn't drive.” Changbin offered immediately, subtly trying to convince you as he stood and grabbed his keys.
“Uh, I actually was going to stay and hang out,” Jisung quickly added before turning to speak directly to you, “are you okay or do you need me to come home with you?” Jisung held his breath, hoping you would say he could stay so you and Changbin could be alone together.
“Oh… no, no you can stay. I can go home with Changbin. I'll just get my car later or something.”
“Then it's settled, are you ready to go?” Changbin asked. You nodded and followed him to the door, making sure to ask Jisung not to forget your clothes before closing the door behind you.
It was painfully bright outside but after asking for permission, Changbin took your arm in his and let you hide your face against his shoulder as he led you to his car. He was even a gentleman as he opened the car door for you and closed it once you were in. It wasn't often you were treated so sweetly and idly you thought that you could get used to it.
“Here.” You were surprised by Changbin holding a pair of dark sunglasses in front of your face. You looked up at his smiling face before taking them and slipping them on to shield your eyes. He was really taking good care of you.
“Thank you.” you said softly. Other than your underwear and shoes you were dressed completely and comfortably in Changbins clothes.
“You're very welcome,” he said warmly, giving you a kind look, “now let's get you home, shall we?”
○●☆♡☆●○
“Would you like to come in for a little bit?”
“Are you sure? Didn't you want to take a bath?” Changbin asked, however he was already turning off the car and unbuckling his seat belt.
“I can take a bath later. I… just want to make sure I get up safely. I'm still feeling a little dizzy.” That was somewhat true, you did still feel a bit dizzy but if you were honest, you just wanted to spend some more time with Changbin.
“Say less.” He said, hopping from the driver's side and scurrying to the passengers side to open the door for you. You assumed that's all he was going to do, but the moment you unbuckled your own seatbelt he lifted you from your seat, bridal style.
“Is this okay?” He asked, shutting the car door with his foot.
You nodded with a giggle, wrapping your arms around his neck and swooning a bit when he smiled at you sweetly. Your mind drifted as he carried you to your apartment, the strength of his arms, how solid his chest was, the sturdiness of his shoulders, you idly thought that he'd be able to bench press you if you wanted to. What else could he do with you?
“You okay? You're zoning on me.” You blinked at Changbins words, suddenly embarrassed, where were your thoughts even going?
“Oh, sorry. I guess I'm more hungover than I thought?” You knew that was a bit of a lame excuse, but Changbin seemed to buy it, deciding to focus instead on the upward climb to your apartment. Your buildings one and only elevator was broken and Changbin had visited enough to know that, but even if it wasn't broken he would have taken the stairs. He just wanted a reason to keep carrying you.
Unfortunately Changbin had to set you down eventually.
Opening the door the two of you slipped inside as you had so many times before. You had grown comfortable with Changbin in your space but something about wearing his clothes this time made things feel more intimate.
“Ok girlie, sit, I'll bring you some tea for your stomach.” Changbin suddenly commanded, gently pushing you to the kitchen island. “You're still not feeling well and I'm not going to let you lift a finger while I'm here.”
“I didn't see you treating the guys so gently.” You chuckled, slipping onto one of the bar stools.
“They're big boys, they're fine.” He replied simply, gathering a mug and kettle from your cabinets. You watched him patiently, amused by how he knew his way around your kitchen like it was his own.
“Ever think you spend too much time here?” You grinned, your chin resting in your palms.
“Nope. My two best friends live here, so it's only natural I'd spend so much time here.” He had an answer for everything today.
Soon you had your tea in hand and the two of you decided to put on a show. You knew Changbin didn't have too much time to give, everyone else was at his apartment after all, but you were happy for the company. Something about Changbin sitting next to you, your shoulders touching, watching a show you both enjoyed, it relaxed you in a way you only ever felt with Jisung and…
A knock at the door caused the two of you to jump.
“Were you expecting anybody?” Changbin asked, pausing your show.
Shaking your head you set your mug down, making your way over to the front door. Changbin attempted to crane his neck so he could see who it was that had decided to drop by from the comfort of the couch, but the layout of your apartment made that impossible. He also knew he shouldn't be nosey, it could be a neighbor for all he knew, so he turned his attention to his phone as he heard you open the door. What he heard made his pulse quicken.
“Hyunjin?!”
“Surprise, Beautiful! I've come to take care of you~!”
Changbin turned his body fully, leaning over the back of the couch just in time to watch you giggle and throw yourself into Hyunjins arms, who happened to have a bag of food, presumably for you. So this was the guy you were on the phone with earlier. He was handsome.
It took Changbin only a moment to realize what Han had meant when he said you and Hyunjin had a complicated relationship. The way the two of you looked at each other, it was like the way you looked at Han - someone you've known and trusted deeply for years. But there was something more there too, something that was never there between you and Han.
Changbins gripped his phone tightly, a sliver of jealousy cutting through him. He reminded himself that you two weren't in any kind of relationship, you said so yourself that you were single and Han reassured him that you two weren't anything exclusive. But, then, why is holding you like that? Why the pet name?
It was another affectionate term that made it impossible for Changbin to stay sitting idly on the couch.
“Baby, what on earth are you wearing???”
“Oh, those are mine.” Changbin interjected, bounding from the couch and making his way over to you and Hyunjin with an amicable smile on his face. You suddenly felt a very funny feeling growing deep in the pit of your stomach.
“You must be the famous Hyunjin I've been hearing about? Nice to meet you, I'm Seo Changbin.” Changbin said, stretching out his hand both to be polite but also so Hyunjin wouldn't have both hands still resting on your waist.
“Awww, been talking about me Beautiful?” Hyunjin teased with that cheerful smile of his before turning his attention to Changbin. “Yes, I am, it's nice to meet you Changbin-ah.”
“You don't have to be formal, any friend of Y/N is cool with me.” He said that, but Changbin can't help but notice how the moment Hyunjins hand releases Changbins, he leaned back towards you to wrap an arm around your shoulder. A subtle sign that asked: “who are you and what are you doing with my Y/N?”
“That's very kind of you Changbin, sorry I didn't bring enough food for all of us. I didn't even know you'd be here.” Another subtle dig.
“No, that's alright. I need to get back to my place anyway, everyone slept there last night and I still have some guests.”
“You're leaving already?” You asked, both oddly relieved but also not wanting him to go. Changbin couldn't help but smile fondly at you, something Hyunjin definitely noticed.
“I have to, I don't trust the guys not to break my stuff. Besides, I have to make sure your clothes are dry, maybe even see if you made any kind of mess on my sheets.” This was meant primarily as a joke, something to make you smile, but it also to act as a dig of his own. Both goals were achieved.
While you giggled at his joke Changbin noticed Hyunjins eyes darkened a bit. It was becoming somewhat known between the two boys, Changbin was making a statement. Something you might have noticed had you not had this unfamiliar mix of feelings swirling within you.
“I'll come back to give you your clothes back soon, I promise Bin.” Changbins heart swelled at the sudden nickname.
“Don't worry about it, keep them as long as you want.” He offered, pretending to wipe some dust off your shoulder, coincidentally on the shoulder Hyunjins hand was resting. “I think they look better on you anyway. It was nice to meet you Hyunjin, hope to see you again.” He added cordially.
“Yeah, same here.” Hyunjin replied, making room for Changbin to step through the door. As he did so, Hyunjin couldn't help but uneasily notice the sweet look on your face as you watched Changbin leave.
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Ooooooh, i spy some hostility between the boys 👀 honestly I got such a kick out of writing this part. You can really see the tension growing between the two, each subtly staking a claim in this race for Y/N's affection
Taglist: @groovygroovyhyunjin @hhwangsmoon
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( "Immoral Immortality" — 1K words )
Immortal au writing made by my sweetheart @sukis-artchive based off this comic while we were chatting on discord
⚠️ Warning for violence and blood
—
It started off like any other night. Perkeo preferred the night shift. It was dimmer, quieter, and over all just less to handle. Well...
"Goodnight Pear..."
Moon's voice came from behind them, though thus wasn't the first and far from the last. Perkeo didn't jump at the sound or the menacing words. They quite liked the nickname 'pear', and as for 'goodnight' it wasn't meant to sound like a threat. Merely Moon greeting them, as he couldn't say "good day".
"Hey Moon"
Perkeo sounded happy, yet looked a little tired.
"How have you been?"
Moon had been doing well lately, (Perkeo knew this) but that didn't nothing to ease their mind.
"G-g...g-Gh-ooooD-"
His voice box glitches out. Perkeo refrains from sighing. They knew this would happen eventually, but the short peace with Moon doing well felt good. Too good. They were so close to fixing him. If only he could have held out a little longer. Moon isn't to blame though, he doesn't know.
And so Perkeo repeats the process they made, down to a tea. They learned how to buy the most time by doing this over, and over, and over again. Funny how similar that was to their 'life'. They always had a 2nd... or 87th chance to try again. Maybe get better results.
"Moon?"
They ask hesitantly, as always.
"Are you alright?
They learned not panicking at his silence results in less of a mess.
His pupils turn to red pinpricks, Perkeo isn't surprised, yet their heartrate still spikes. Some things never change.
A bead of sweat starts to form on their cheek, they know what's to come.
Moon reaches out to caress their face. Perkeo has learnt to accept fate.
...
"...Moon?-"
"Moon?"
"...Moon?"
"Moon!" Moon snaps their attention to Perkeo.
"Are you even listenin' to me? Geez." they hold a tablet, bangs barely cover what appears to be a small bandage.
"Sorry, Starlight, my mind was over the moon..." He looks around, getting his bearings, trying to remember what was happening... before that.
"Uh-huh"
The noise pulls him out of his thoughts, he doesn't even know what "that" was. Unable to recall it properly. Strange.
"So what were you saying?" He feels bad ignoring his friend, even if it was accidentally. What's wrong with you?
"I said we're done, you doofus, now go charge because we have a long day tomorrow... I'll close everything."
'All done'? Ohhh it must have been maintenance of his software, that's what the tablet was for. And it explains his forgetfulness, he was always like this after 'check ups'. But he trusts Perkeo.
He gets up off the desk, and reaches to grab them. "I'll leave it to you, then~ nighty night, friend. Sleep well."
He mutters a 'see you tomorrow' under his breath, as they bonk heads. His hand gently holding the sides of their face, fingers threading through their fluffy hair. He doesn't register their rigid posture. Or the slight tremor that courses through their whole body. Not even the small frown gracing their lips.
He walks off to charge, just as they had said.
Perkeo sighs, placing the tablet down. They had held the screen cautiously out of view from Moon the entire time. And start to utter Sun's cleanup chant "Clean up, Clean up".
They had luckily knew thought ahead to leave out the disinfectant. They had never been so grateful that the DCA cannot enter behind the desk, as they look down. Even through the curls falling into their eyes, they can see the crimson smear on the side of the furniture.
Their smear.
A bloody handprint slid across the hard surface.
Perkeo shivered as they walked around the desk. Trying not to look at the red mark. It was so painfully obvious among the bright colours of the daycare. The smell of iron becomes stronger as they get closer. Their stomach twists uncomfortably at the scent.
They reach for the disinfectant, grabbing it as a shudder runs through their body. They ignore it and get back to work. Hmmm, they'd get used to it, eventually.
Grabbing a small cloth, they dab it with disinfectant and get to work. Nose scrunching, they slowly build up the courage to touch the blood. Why is this so hard?
not like it's the first time.
Suddenly the feeling of sickness overwhelms them. They crumple a bit. The sight of their hand lining up perfectly with the print made them gag. It wasn't a pleasant sight, they forgot this would happen.
Memories flash back to them. Of all the other times they made the mistake of touching the handprint like this, instead of wiping it clean immediately.
Then, just like every other time, the other Memories come back.
Well if you can even call them that. 'Memories' sounds happy. Perkeo knew that the connotations don't mean anything though. They've been through too much, and learned that the bad experiences are also 'memories' in a sense.
Their body spasms, as their chest rocks with sobs. They'd never get used to extreme pain. Not even with how many 'deaths' they experienced.
It hurt so bad.
—
Their eyes were swollen and puffy with streaks from their crying. They learned that the only way to live longer was to not fight it. It would toy with them as much as possible, before going for the kill.
It tore into Perkeo like a feast, slicing them with sharp claws. They had been oh so gentle before, Perkeo may never get used to the change.
They didn't want to give it the satisfaction of a scream. It would only make it hurt more then. Perkeo remembers that.
They let it mutilate them. It scratches them, punctures them, drags them by their wounds and hair, pulls them apart. But this was a friend, Perkeo knew it was worth it. It'll all be over soon.
They find some comfort in that, feeling empty otherwise. The small voice of preservation that they thought they long since killed was barely a whisper.
...no....run...
Huh, now that's a surprise. Perkeo thinks, too late. The voice was warning them. Their body even knew what was to come at this point. Oh the irony, the vessel who puts them through this wanting the pain to stop. The only reason Perkeo sticks around here is because of their immortality. If it wasn't for their body, Perkeo wouldn't need to die.
Nothing, not Perkeos experience, nor all the past pain inflicted upon them, could prepare them for what's to come. Perkeo always blocked out this part, it's happened before.
They let out a single cut off screech. Their vocal chords still not fully healed from the last time.
As Moon forces his hand into their socket, violently ripping out their eye.
Blood splatters everywhere, the eyeball bursting in his grip. Perkeo crumbles to the ground.
...should have listened.
The little voice chimed, as Perkeo finally backs away from Moon, for the first time that night. Bad idea, and Perkeo knew it.
Though their immortal side has given them an aloof disposition and immeasurable tolerance. Instinct always found a way to persist.
They knew backing away would make it worse, but it hurt too much now for them to do anything else. They knew this would lead to it ending quicker.
Moon grabs them, claws digging into their flesh. They manage to make it behind the desk, his fingers raking through their skin before losing its grip. They try to pull themselves up, bloodied hands smearing the desk as they use it to push themselves up. They grab the tablet and force a shut down.
Hmmm, this is one of the first times they didn't die...
It takes them hours to fix up themselves and clean the mess, but when they finally do dread starts to well up again. Moon was shut down, but absolutely covered in Perkeos blood. Atleast this time Perkeo remembered to not leave any handprints on Moon. It made this so much harder to clean.
The dread still doesn't subside when they finish, as they pick up the tablet. Connecting it to Moon, they replay the footage. Watching their torture always made it worse.
Deleting the files, they reboot him.
They sigh.
"Hopefully this time we can last a little longer."
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