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#AND her sidekick
autisminfinite · 6 months
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protector of earth, magical girl maria ( •̀ ω •́ )✧
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why aren't there more mysteries that take place in nursing homes & retirement communities. i want to watch a group of deranged retirees-cum-amateur-detectives combine their powers of:
decades of life experience
boredom-fueled busybody shamelessness
access to the most gossipy next-door-neighbors in existence
"I am too old to be arrested and/or give a shit" attitude
and solve crimes. this should be an enormous subgenre.
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Catwoman's new sidekick (dc x dp)
This is very loosely inspired by this prompt. Enjoy the blurb:)
Danny didn’t really like guns. Not the ecto-weapons his parents made, but the actual bullet-filled guns. He knew how to use them, as that was what his parents had based themselves off of to create their own ectoplasm-powered version of it, but he didn’t like them. So when he’d found one not only loaded, but with the safety off in his apartment’s garbage bin, he’d plan to take it and go throw it in the river to make sure nobody would get to use it. Danny wasn’t exactly shocked to see it, this was Gotham after all, but it was a bit of a nasty surprise to say the least. It wasn’t like it could really hurt him anymore, it seemed halfas had a sort of built-in instinct for going intangible (which had explained why the Nasty-Burger-explosion-that-never-happened hadn’t affected him despite being taken completely by surprise).
Not to mention he was already in a bad mood at the news that Vlad was in the city right now for some rich guy nonsense, which Danny was 100% sure meant the fruitloop was going to come by to bother him at some point in the next few days.
“Hello, Daniel,” came Vlad’s voice from behind him as if summoned.
“Get away from me, you creep,” Danny answered, not turning around. Instead, he started walking in the opposite direction.
“Is that anyway to talk to your unckie Vlad?” The man said with his smarmy tone. “And I came by such a long way to come see you.”
“You saw me, now you can leave.” Danny didn’t bother turning his head as Vlad caught up so they were walking side by side.
The billionaire tsked as he looked around. “It’s such a shame you live in such a poor neighbourhood. You know the offer to pay for your tuition is still open.”
“Not in a million years,” Danny answered dryly.
“You’re just as stubborn as my dear Madeleine used to be,” Vlad sighed and Danny felt the disgust twist his features into a grimace.
“Still being a creepy disgusting old loner, Vlad?” Danny snarked. “How many cats are you on, number 5?”
There was flash of anger in the older man’s eye before he smirked. “And how is dear Danielle these days, it’s been so long since she came by. I think she’ll be due for another meltdown soon.”
On impulse, Danny raised the gun, knowing full well the man would go intangible faster than any bullet and pointed it at Vlad. “Don’t you dare touch her.”
“Oh please, Daniel,” Vlad scoffed. “What are you going to do, shoot me?”
“Maybe,” Danny retorted.
“It wouldn’t change anything,” Vlad dismissed.
“Might make me feel better,” Danny said even as he lowered the gun a bit, knowing it wouldn’t do anything.
Vlad knew this just as well, and he sneered before turning his back to Danny and walking away with a parting shot. “I always get what I want, Daniel. Whether it’s through you or her.”
The gun that Danny had lowered slightly now came back up. He was so tempted to empty the stupid thing at Vlad, no matter if it would all pass through him. Before he could do anything though, a voice from above sounded.
“He’s not worth it, kid.”
Danny looked up to find the masked face of Catwoman peering down on him.
“He deserves worse than this,” Danny said, mind still on the temptation of shooting at Vlad’s intangible back. This was a deserted part of the city, it wasn’t like it would hurt anyone else.
“I promise there are better ways to make him pay,” Catwoman answered.
Danny scoffed bitterly. “Vlad’s so rich, he can pay off anyone and cover up any scandal I could think of.” And if money didn’t work, there was always straight-up overshadowing innocent bystanders.
The masked woman hesitated for a while before she called down determinately. “Look, get rid of the gun, and I promise I’ll help you make him pay.”
“Really?” Danny wasn’t too sure what that entailed but anything that would hinder Vlad was a go for him. “You promise?”
“I do,” she stated with conviction. “But you have to lose the gun.”
“Yeah, ok,” Danny said. He was going to do it anyways, but if she wanted it gone even faster, Danny wasn’t going to argue.
Selina watched as her new sidekick dropped off the gun into the river. It fell in with a splash that had something in her curling comfortably. Maybe Bruce was really rubbing off on her if she was picking up strays
But, Selina had a good feeling about this. Talking a kid out of murder had been how Batman had gotten his first Robin, after all.
Part 2
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wandixx · 2 months
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Ghost of fries and Hero of cookies part 2
All work words count: 14 593
Words in this part: 1 794
Summary of whole work: Duke wasn't expecting to wake up from his quick rooftop nap to some meta kid with fries. He also wasn't expecting kid to stay Or Danny asked Dani to stay safe while she was in Gotham. Where would she be safer than under the wing of local hero? And he looked like he needed bad day combo anyway
This part summary: Of new names and teasing
Beta read by @audhumla-sailor though English is second language for both of us, so proceed with this in mind. I also know all of the charaters through fics alone, so probably ooc. Stay catious if it's something you don't like
First part
Duke knew that Dani was in their agreed meeting point, he even vaguely knew where she was floating but not much more. She used her invisibility, which was weird since she knew it didn't work correctly on him. It was fifth time they met, of course they knew. 
"Hey Signal, remember how you said that I need a codename if we're going to hang out in future and that all my previous ideas were horrible names?" a disembodied girly voice asked. Duke smiled. Ever since he raised the idea, the girl would come up with ridiculous names to be called, proposing them with absolutely straight face. It was expected from someone who thought Dani Phantom was a good alias. It didn't make her ideas any less amusing.
"Of course I do. Whatcha got for me today?"
"Alright, since you don't let me be a name stealer, I decided to take a sheet from local nightlife's notebook–"
"You mean take a leaf from their book?" He was sure she was rolling her eyes on him, but it didn't stop him. No one could maim English language like that with him around.
"Whatever. I chose to steal their idea and became a bird. It's only fair since I can actually fly!"
"Can't exactly disagree. So, what did you get this time?"
"You'll like that, I promise. But now, I introduce to you…"
Duke got ready to shut down every Robin iteration and all Birdgirls he could think of.
"HOOPOE!" Dani yelled, popping back to the visible spectrum. She was covered in bright orange cape with weirdly shaped hood and flimsy mask "I even did some costume changes to fit the name better–" in all honesty, one, yeah, he wasn't blind he realized, two, he needed a moment to remember how these birds looked (his first thought was 'wait it's a thing?!'). But then he got it and yeah, those were funny little creatures, just like Dani. It fitted her "–so even if you don't like it, it doesn't matter," she added, sticking her tongue out.
Duke patted her on the head. He was there, he knew it mattered.
"It's a great name Hoopoe"
Dani visibly though probably unconsciously, relaxed. Her mouth curved into a proud grin and her aura brightened. Normal auras didn't do that. He got used to Dani surprising him like that sometimes.
"Of course it's great, I made it."
Duke chose to not remind her about almost two dozen times she came up with absolutely not great names or about the fact that technically she didn't quite make this one either. He wasn't in such a petty mood. Maybe in future if he needed blackmail.
Oh, it was such a Bat thing, wasn't it? He needed to spend some more time with his civilian to get it out of himself, he liked his ability to interact with normal people in a healthy way. 
*
"Wait, is your mask a paper?"
"What else could it be, titanium?"
"If you stop three muggings on the next three patrols each I'll get you a better one, okay?"
"Hey, my mask is perfectly fine"
"Yeah, but it can tear too easily. I can get you a mask that is more sturdy."
"Aha."
"It's the same material every Robin and Nightwing wear…"
"Don't care, my mask is flawless"
"..."
"Okay, better mask would be cool"
***
On the third patrol Dani joined, about a week and a half ago, they exchanged numbers. Duke knew how hard it was to come to terms with new powers on one's own and God strike him with a lightning or something if he ever lets anyone go through similar bullshit. Especially since she didn't seem to have anyone taking care of her. Girl her age shouldn't be able to hang out or respond to messages within ten minutes at any given time. Only twice she didn't do that, because she was on a celebrity hunt for autographs as she later explained. He would be teased endlessly if any Wayne or their associate learned about it, but he considered introducing Dani to Bruce. She needed help, okay?! He didn't inherit adoption tendencies.
But he hadn't done that, partially because he didn't want to scare Dani off and partially because of fear of teasing. And bet. Because of course in the meantime somehow there happened a bet. 
He smirked at the video Dani sent as a response to the hydration check. She was tossing a coin and playing an elimination game to pick one juice from eight drinks she had. Steph jumped over the back of the couch to join him. At the start she was in front of him so to do that she had to run around the furniture but such minor inconveniences couldn't even wish to stop her dramatics.
"You're smiling at your phone ergo you either text your secret girlfriend/boyfriend/enbyfriend or watch memes. Show me the memes," she demanded, nudging him in the arm. Duke chuckled.
"Wrong guess. I'm texting my sidekick," they agreed it would be a funny way to introduce Dani to people who asked. Duke tried his best at this whole having sidekick thing anyway. As well as he could without help from other Bats because of this damn bet.
Steph froze for a moment.
"Your what–"
"And the lucky winner is… an apple with mint juice! Damn I really hoped it would be lemonade,"  Dani from the video announced cheerfully before opening the bottle" Shame it didn't make it past semi-finals. Happy hydration break. I'm going on an autograph hunt so I may not respond for the next two hours or so. Wish me luck, bye~"
Duke paused the video before it replayed. He glanced at Steph who finally rebooted.
"How come you got a kid and I learned about it just now?"
“In my defense I'm like 60% sure you're the second person in the family to learn about her. Depends if Tim got his ‘I have to know everything, gotta check body cams’ paranoid spree in the last two weeks or not. There was no teasing from Babs or anyone else if I'm being honest and no lecture from B, so they have no idea.”
“First was Alfred?”
“First was Alfred. I still don't know how.”
“That's our grandtler for you. You are forgiven but you have to tell me everything about her,” Steph demanded excitedly. “And show me the photos''
Duke snorted.
“She goes by Hoopoe and is about Damian's age. She can tell you her real name when B inevitably finds out and tries to interrogate her.”
“What if Spoiler drops by during the day?”
“You can try but give it another week and a day, okay?”
“Why?”
“We have bet that I'll hide her from B for three weeks. Tomorrow is the end of the second week. We both know how he is, he'll have questions if you randomly show up during the day."
"Stakes?"
"Speedster worth of winners favorite Batburger meal, 2 quarts of chosen drink and cookies"
"Valid. I ain't snitch, but I want to know more. Is she a meta?”
"Yeah. Powers I know of are invisibility, intangibility, superspeed, enhanced hearing and flight. Probably more. I think she already had some training with it because she has quite amazing control over this stuff. Like, it comes naturally to her. But her hand to hand is atrocious."
"Are you jealous?"
"No."
"Omg, you totally are! Don't be, she is just a baby with a better idea of what's going on with her powers than you have with yours. There is nothing to be mad about Duke, it's okay Duke–"
"Keep going and I won't tell you anything about her," he dared, trying not to snort. 
"Sorry, sorry, you're doing great, please continue," she nudged his arm again "Don't be such softie, dude" He stared at her at the comment, disbelief clear on his face. Steph at least then looked a little ashamed "Okay, sorry. You're honestly doing far better than any of us would. Excluding Cass and Alfred."
"Excluding Cass and Alfred," he agreed easily enough.
"So, you think your kid has some training with her powers," she recalled eagerly.
"Yeah, probably from when she was helping her cousin. He is a hero in Amity Park, Illinois, his name is Phantom. It took very little digging even though Hoopoe does her best to stay mysterious. I swear this kid has no brain-mouth filter. But! I got my second shovel talk from her cousin!”
“The what?”
“After a week of hanging out with her, I got message on Signal’s twitter from Phantom that basically read as ‘I have nothing against you, really dude I’m a fan but here is list of my most powerful enemies, and let me tell you, there were some scarily powerful guys there, I won with all of them, if something bad happens to Hoopoe I can and will destroy you.’ After some research, yes, I think he could try and have considerable chance of success. Even if he didn’t fight would be painful enough to be a lesson. He and Hoopoe have the same powers and she worked with him for some time. She most likely learned then. She was called Dani Phantom, boy went by Danny Phantom then”
“Dear gods, their aliases were so horrible, who even let them go with it?! Are those their first names?!” Steph sounded genuinely offended by it.
“I don’t know,” Yeah, he knew, but he preferred to keep at least this secret to himself ”In boy's defense, because Hoopoe came much later,  he was fourteen and Amity went to shit really fast, so alias was probably not his first concern. And it’s much better than Invioso-bill, name he was given by the press. And he uses some intense gaslighting to make people believe it’s just Phantom now. And allegedly they’re both ghosts. Apparently ghosts don’t exactly have secret identity”
“You doubt it”
“You would too. She eats, she breathes and she is tangible by default. From what I know, ghosts don’t do that”
“They don’t, I checked. I went on a research spree when I first learned about Deadman. I just thought it was so cool you know. Ghosts being real and all,” Steph leaned towards him, almost vibrating with anticipation.
“Really?” he asked, knowing what he was getting into.
“Yeah, you see…”
And on she went, releasing expected infodump as if she waited for this opportunity ever since she first read about it.
********
Some additional name getting shenanigans
Signal: I won't call you Dani in the field
Dani: Why?
Signal: Ever heard of secret identity? Name is, like, half of it. Disguise is other half but it can be exchanged with lore. Superman made it work. Just make up enough lore for people to not question it.
Dani: Oh, okay *gremlin^2 mode activated*
Random they just rescued: And who are you little one?
Dani: *looking them dead in the eyes* I am clone of dead child hero, travelling around the world to find identity separated from my template befre mistakes made during my creation make me turn into puddle of primordal liquid and my conciousness fades forever
Random: *petrified* What?
Signal: *internally* I have miscalculated
Dani: Kid Signal
Signal: No.
Dani: It works in Central
Signal: We're not in Central
Dani: Signalgirl
Dani: I mean, Batgirl exists
Signal: No.
Dani: Monochromatic Signal. Y'know, Red Robin route?
Signal: ...
Signal: Just no. Don't make my name part of your name
Next part
Do you want to see some Hoopoe doodles I made? There were redesigns!!!
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shslprince · 5 months
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I like her unfortunately
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nortism · 1 month
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rip mary guppy, you would have loved carrying pet rats around in your apron and letting them climb on your shoulders
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idk-bruh-20 · 8 months
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Irondad fic ideas #160
Before the Avengers went to go and fight Thanos, Tony took some time to implement some tiny features into his robots -- in case he never made it home. For example, he coded DUM-E so that he'd do the little 8-bit happy birthday song on his most beloveds' birthdays. Morgan's, Pepper's, Rhodey's, Happy's, and, of course, Peter's.
Fast forward to after NWH. Tony is still in his coma post-snap (we know no death here). Pepper is cleaning his workshop as a nervous habit. Then, DUM-E starts to sing. A calm and slow playthrough of "Happy Birthday"
She lets it play out in confusion. Then, a hologram of Tony pops up, and he says, with the utmost adoration, "Happy birthday, Pete. I'm proud of you, Underoos."
And Pepper stands there in confusion because... Who is Pete?
This fic idea was submitted by @seaglass-syndrome !
Inspired by the adorable & heartbreaking true story of the Curiosity Rover !
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unreal-unearthing · 3 months
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Nancy drew cw you will always be famous to me. Really asked ‘what if everyone’s favorite plucky and precocious teen mystery-solver grew up to find out her quaint hometown was actually, like, super fucking haunted?’ and didn’t wait for an answer.
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morporkian-cryptid · 7 months
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In honor of the new season of Netflix's LUPIN coming out in -counts on fingers- HOLY SHIT TEN DAYS, have some diagrams!
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I'm specifying "his/their Lupin" because in Benjamin and Guédira's case, they know both the OG book Lupin and someone among their friends who is basically Lupin.
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cgrian · 10 months
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ID 1: five drawings on one digital canvas featuring various Hermit/MCYT ship pairings. Every image afterwards is the cropped, isolated versions of each drawing, individually described below.
ID 2: Grian and Mumbo drawn over a real-life photo of a woman holding up a man by his legs against a chain link fence as they kiss. Grian is lifting up Mumbo.
ID 3: Doc and Grian drawn over a real-life photo of a woman smugly caressing a happy muscular man's chest. Grian is caressing Doc.
ID 4: Grian and Mumbo drawn over a real-life photo of a short man leaning on a counter while flirting with a tall woman at a bar. Grian is flirting with Mumbo.
ID 5: Martyn kissing Ren's forehead. Ren is dressed in his Red King outfit, and Martyn is dressed in his usual green shirt.
ID 6: Scar resting his head on top of Bdubs'. Scar is wearing his mayor outfit, and Bdubs is wearing a light blue shirt. On the right, a small doodle of Grian holding up queer and transgender pride flags is captioned "be who you aaare". End ID
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lightningthunderstorm · 8 months
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The Dumbass Trio
Song: No Scared - ONE OK ROCK
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tippenfunkaport · 7 months
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the existence of the Swift Wind lizard implies that the She-Ra can transform as many sacred companions as she wishes and I think this is an untapped well of comic potential
Imagine She-Ra traipsing through the forest Snow White style surrounded by woodland creatures but they all have rainbow wings and horns and love communism
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jasontoddssuper · 5 months
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Free Percy Jackson,Jason Todd and Hobie Brown from the Swiftie boyfriend allegations
Edit:Hp/Marauder's Era fans liking is Wild.You're literally Switfies in book nerd form
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alvindraperzzz · 6 months
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Joking aside though, Cassie’s disconnect from Diana’s mission is weird on several other levels.
One. We know Cassie is eloquent and persuasive when she wants to be. Inspiring, even. She convinces Zeus to give her powers. She’s almost as guilty as Tim is for number of rousing speeches. It’s called into focus in the lead up to Sins of Youth, when Tim makes Cassie the spokesperson for Young Justice; despite her doubt she convinces the nation, and the League, to give YJ a chance. She becomes leader of Young Justice because her teammates voted her to be leader (out of universe because she won a fan poll, which will never stop being astounding to me). As leader of the Teen Titans, she acts as liaison to city officials and other teams.
Why isn’t Diana using this? There are entire demographics Cassie can reach that Diana might not be able to. 
Two. Public perception. Cassie does a lot of crazy stuff. I’m not just talking about her shenanigans with YJ. Cassie has been kicked out of multiple schools, most for behavioral issues, at least one of them for being Wonder Girl. She technically kidnapped the President (Amazons Attack was garbage start to finish and I hate to acknowledge it, but unfortunately it happened). See Wonder Woman and Teen Titans for other major fights and major property damage.
Cassie is Wonder Girl. She is publically associated with Wonder Woman, as her protege and sidekick. There’s no mention of how what Cassie does could reflect on Diana. Diana, an ambassador from a foreign country who regularly speaks to the United Nations. You’d think Diana’s PR team would have something to say about that.
There’s more but like. This disconnect is so weird. Is it because she’s a teenager? She fights supervillains and risks her life everyday, I think she can handle outreach and a little public speaking. Is it because she’s uninterested? I don’t think Diana would have accepted Cassie if she had complete disinterest in her cause, or at least, we’d see more conversations about it. Is it because her training got handed off to Artemis, who has a different upbringing and set of values from Diana? That… actually has merit. Doesn’t explain everything, but it does account for some things.
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wandixx · 2 months
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Ghost of fries and hero of cookies part 6
All work words count: 14 643
Words in this part: 2 686
Summary of whole work: Duke wasn't expecting to wake up from his quick rooftop nap to some meta kid with fries. He also wasn't expecting kid to stay
Or
Danny asked Dani to stay safe while she was in Gotham. Where would she be safer than under the wing of local hero? And he looked like he needed bad day combo anyway
This part summary: Batman wants an explanation. His kids however, wouldn't be themselves if they did add some chaos
Beta read by @audhumla-sailor though English is second language for both of us, so proceed with this in mind. I also know all of the charaters through fics alone, so probably ooc. Stay catious if it's something you don't like
First part, Previous part
“Signal.”
Duke bit back a sigh as his last hope to leave Cave undiscovered disappeared. He shot Steph message of:
Having The Talk. Come as moral support
and turned around to face Bruce.
“Yes?”
B grunted in disapproving and ‘Signal report’ way but Duke decided to buy some time and answer only questions that were actually asked. He slowly sat at the briefing table and looked at the man expectantly.
Lift chimed and moments later Tim and Cass went to Batcomputer and training mats respectively. Duke was, like, 80% sure they were there to eavesdrop. He knew them well enough. He knew them well enough.
“The girl”
“Izzy?” Was Duke annoying on purpose? Yes. He really didn’t want to have this talk. Like, at all. Psychological warfare it was “I mean, I know she is civilian and you don’t approve but at least she isn’t doing anything illegal, right? Like, you know, robbing museums or killing people?”
Bruce looked repulsed and Tim snorted.
“Low blow Narrows, low blow” Jason announced through speakers. He was slightly winded as if he just finished a fight “Good job kid”
“So you’re listening too, great” Duke muttered under his breath before louder he added “Is everyone who wants in on a show, here already?”
“Give me a sec- here Dick you’re going live now”
“Thanks Babs, you’re the best”
“I know. Donuts, you know which one”
“Of course. Glad we’re finally going to talk about Duke’s kid”
“Shut up, she is not my kid!”
“Steph ETA 2 minutes” Cass interrupted.
At least Damian didn’t show up- as if summoned by this thought Damian stomped down the stares, Alfred the Cat curled in his arms. Maybe others had a point, calling him Demon kid and stuff.
“What is an emergency?” he demanded and Duke decided to take what little relief he could from the fact that Bruce seemed equally defeated by sheer number of people around for this talk. 
“It seems like… oh, literally everyone lost an adoption bet” Babs explained. Huh, so Steph didn’t change her stance.
Damian looked genuinely terrified as he muttered “No” eyes darting between everyone present in silent calculation.
“Oh, shut up” Duke whined knowing all too well his stalling had to come to the end. Maybe it was wishful thinking but he almost heard roar of engine of Steph’s motorcycle. Her presence would be double edged sword but she would help him advocate for Dani and that was more important.
“Thomas, what have you done?!” if it was anyone other than Damian, Duke would call sound he made a whine. As it was, he preferred his entrails to stay inside and since the boy showed up, called by thought, the older boy preferred not to take risks.
“Nothing, Babs is overreacting”
“Don’t deny it. She went about it kinda Tim Lite style but it worked”
“I don’t even know her surname, where she stays or really, anything about her life outside of our patrols, how do you expect me to go about adoption?!”
“B knew even less about me when he decided, yes this tire thief is my new son!” Jason chimed in and Duke knew he was grinning despite voice modulator.
“What from my origin story was lost to make Lite version?”
“Identities weren't breached as far as we're aware. Just ‘came one day and refuses to leave’ part and some light stalking. She was smart about it, invisible, keeping out of sight and to the hot spots. Wouldn't find her if I didn't know she was there”
“She could still just not tell, I mean I knew for years before telling anyone…”
“There is no way. Believe me, she has no brain-mouth filter, I swear”
“But-”
“She introduced herself by her first name,” Duke deadpanned ”She told me civilian names of heroes from her hometown, in context that didn't require me to do any actual research to clue me. I did anyway. I don't think she even realized she did it. If she knew our identities we would know already”
There was a moment of silence as everyone digested the thought of just how gigantic breach Dani accidentally caused.
“Well, it's as good of a proof as we can get for now,” Babs bristled. 
“Who let her in on such secrets then?!” Damian sounded genuinely appalled and Duke wasn't too surprised.
Like on a cue, Steph stormed inside on her Spoiler in civies. Bruce looked about ready to get aneurysm. Duke was a bit glad that everyone was doing such good job in distraction department.
“IT’S OKAY, WHY? BECAUSE I AM HERE!” Steph yelled, jumping from before her vehicle fully stopped. She threw something small in general direction of Batcomputer “Timmy plug it in, I made a PowerPoint!”
Duke felt blood leave his face. He wasn't sure if he wanted to know what Steph put together but he probably didn't. Tim opened it anyways.
WHY HOOPOE IS ADORABLE&CHAOTIC BEAN AND SHOULD BE PART OF THE TEAM
The title slide said, one of the clearest photos of Dani from before she started wearing mask in the background. It was close-up of girl smiling, bits of brownie on her cheeks.
“Was this photo taken with a goddamn calculator?” Tim asked with disgust so clear Duke could taste it. Metaphorically of course.
“Nah, just body-cam. Her powers mess with technology a bit”
Tim still looked displeased at the craftsmanship.
“Don't worry, it's not  a bad photo. Baby Bird is just being perfectionist,” Dick placated.
Duke didn't realize that Damian froze until he unfroze and made his way to the screen, stopping less than one foot away from it. His movements were rigid, his face scrunched with distress. Alfred the Cat escaped its master probably due to hoe tense he was. Everyone in Cave quietened as soon as boy took first step and expecting mood had to run through microphones because nobody from the on-line crowd quipped in.
“This is the green of Lazarus” he whispered finally, sounding actually scared. Jason swore. Bruce and Cass visibly stiffened. Tim choked and he wasn't even drinking. Dick did his whinny breezy name saying thing when he wanted explanation and felt lightly betrayed. 
It was Duke's turn to freeze because… it wasn't. Of course he wasn't all that well versed in the Pit, less alone its color but he did bust quite a few trafficking rings with Jason and he saw his eyes afterwards all raging, toxic, neon green glory and it wasn't the same as Dani’s. As much as he liked English and how good he was at it, it failed him at simple task of describing the obvious difference between each other. He'd have more luck describing tastes with set of color samples from IKEA or something. And really, even if he tried he would lose the fight of competence with Damian. Who wouldn't.  But-
“There is no way she has any connection with LOA”
“Why is that?” Damian seemed to misinterpret it as challenge like he always did when emotions were running high. Duke took a deep breath. Well, it was a moment to use all of his diplomatic skills and speak in the language of the demons.
“I've seen her fight. She would be utter disgrace”
“It does not prove-”
“It does” Duke interrupted with the tone and mimic of person who saw too much because he did ”None of you have any say until you watch a tiny and I mean tiny ten year old tackle five Joker goons like it's a joke, by sheer virtue of super strength and intangibility-means-I-can-ignore-bullets-Signal-don’t-be-such-worrywart. She should get shot, like, three times at least. And she kept laughing!” he was low key wheezing at the end because even after all this time (a week) it was fucking horrifying. Bruce made a huff that meant he was laughing and put a hand on his shoulder as a sign of support. Dick's lighthearted laugh sang from the speakers.
“Don't worry Duke, it never gets better” B said with mirth.
He refused to elaborate whether he meant ‘kids keep jumping into danger like there is no tomorrow‘ or ‘it's equally terrifying every time’ and Duke decided to reflect on that sentiment later. It put some things into perspective. A lot of things if he was being honest.
Also, he was not ready for stuff like that to become even semi-normal occurrence. He was ready to give her all of his Alfred cookies if it could change anything. He knew it wouldn't. 
“Do you have any other evidence that your new acquaintance does not just fake being less experienced to make you lower your guard?” Damian asked warily.
“I had to teach her out of putting her thumb in her fist,” he deadpanned. Several people hissed in empathetic pain. Steph coughed to bring attention to where she stood in front of Batcomputer, other slide of her Power Point open. Duke recognised video from his body-cam.
“Exhibit A” she announced. She played a video with Dani’s first mugging attempt he witnessed. Let it be said, it was a disaster.
“Exhibit B '' One of Dani’s most epic fails at side-kick that ended with her falling face first to the ground.
“Exhibit C” Dani fumbled with zip-ties, looking at him utterly at loss.
“Exhibit D” the talk about her prior training.
“What’s was that sound?” Dick obviously on the verge of cooing when girl on video growled. Steph stopped video.
“Very angry kitten” Tim stated with soft smile.
“Honestly, furious girl” Cass corrected “She was really mad at you”
“Yeah, I know but promise of Alfred’s cookies was enough to placate her”
“You gave her Alfred’s cookies?!”
“She started by giving me a lot of food on a really shitty patrol, had to repay somehow”
“Was it from your share or-” Dick asked like it was most important thing in the world.
“Miss Hoopoe was added to my plans after she picked her new name” Alfred explained and shit, Duke really should get used to how man just appeared sometimes. Jumpscare the original.
“Alfred, you knew?” Bruce sounded so utterly betrayed.
“I have yet to meet her but I was informed about her presence about two weeks ago”
“He caught me printing mask for her”
“About that” Steph clapped and skipped her slide show ���Look at thi clueless child with such horrible disguises and codename ideas” There was whole list of every name Dani wanted to try out and photo of her bare face.  Duke kinda repressed his memories of it. It was worse than he remembered.
“Did she really tried kenting that?”
“Got it after her cousin. He used his first name as part of his alias for almost half a year” Duke admitted in carefree tone, knowing it would cause a mess.
“Cousin?!” several people yelled in surprise.
“Caped cousin?!”
“Yup. Small time hero from Illinois. As far as I’m aware she’s alone in Gotham but they’re in regular contact and she has strong believe that he can and will help her if she used her panic button”
“Who in their right mind let’s kid alone in Gotham?!” Jason sounded about ready to strangle Phantom.
“He seems to be fifteen himself. And has anti-meta parents if I’m picking things up correctly. She didn’t mention them much. I highly doubt she has present parents at all, so…”
“What the hell Narrows.”
“I don’t know, it’s just a wild guess”
“Does it call for the rescue?” Steph asked eagerly.
“We’re not going to Illinois to rescue Phantom if he doesn’t ask for it. He has means to it” Bruce interrupted with bone deep sigh.
“How do you know I meant Phantom?” Duke perked up because he never mentioned this name.
“He is from Illinois, looks almost the same as far as I can tell from the photos and they share a lot of powers”
“I didn’t know you knew about random kid hero from other state?”
“He dropped by on few Justice League’s mission. There is still dispute whether we should approach him in his city or not. He was very clear on his opinion that we should stay away. I think we really shouldn’t”
“How you haven’t gone or sent anyone there yet?” Tim teased.
Bruce just stared at him then gestured at mountain of cases they were currently working on. Yes, they were printed. Apparently for man it made it easier to work on them like that.
“Can we focus back on untrained child you let join you on patrol, Duke?”
“You act like I could stop her from doing her own thing if I didn’t  let her. Plus, even though she doesn’t have combat training, she can handle herself well enough. And has this damn intangibility that makes her really hard to punch”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I didn’t tell anyone other than Alfred and Steph and I wanted to wait a bit before leaving her to the wolfs”
“The bet”
“Shut up Steph”
“When did you plan on letting us know?” Bruce ignored what blonde insinuated. Duke was utterly grateful for that, he knew he would get lecture for that later but he was more than happy to leave it be for now.
“Somewhen next week. I hoped to introduce her gradually but apparently everyone knew already?”
“Kids tell me things. Hoopoe made a good impression on them” Jason explained.
“Hero sightings on Twitter” Dick admitted without a shadow of shame.
“What he said” Tim agreed “This person from crochet dolls made one for your kid too, so in public eyes she’s our already”
“For the last time, she isn’t my kid!” Duke groaned but as always went ignored.
“Nobody expected old man’s tendencies to rub on you so fast, Narrows”
“Shut up and this is half a reason I didn’t let you meet her. All of you”
“With all due respect Duke” Babs started teasingly “You gave us ammo yourself. You improved her diet, you brought her to The Food Track Of Mental Breakdowns, you teach her stuff, you check in on her almost as often as her cousin and their friends do…”
“How did you hack her pho- No, wrong question, why?!”
“We’re all paranoid bastards, I needed to check out the newest bird. She legally doesn’t exist btw so I suspect some shady stuff with her birth but otherwise nothing sus about her. Comms and trackers for her are waiting in drawer C19. You will give it to her tomorrow”
“Aye, aye captain Oracle ma’am” he joked.
“Wait, you showed her The Food Track?”
“She deserved it” he gritted out.
Before this could turn into a fight or something, Alfred demanded:
“Since we are all on the same page now, I would like to extend an invitation for family dinner to miss Hoopoe”
“We’ll eat it down here in full costumes”
“As you wish master Bruce. Master Duke make sure to let her know”
“Of course Alfred”
And he planned to do that but Dani didn’t show up. He hadn’t thought much of it because she was unpredictable like that. She tended to disappear from the face of the Earth for a day or two and return with tales of her “autograph hunting trips”
But then she didn’t show up on the next patrol too. It was unprecedented. And she hadn’t responded to the check in. Three times in the row. He was getting kinda sick from the stress.
He knew Dani well enough, she wouldn’t ghost him like that and in Gotham disappearing meant three things: getting kidnapped, trafficked or six feet under. To their knowledge, Dani didn’t have anyone who would pay ransom for her other than Signal and no demands were made so the first option was out.
Bats launched full fledged search.
Duke himself found and busted two trafficking rings in three weeks which was around how much he did in two months on a daily basis.
Thanks to Oracle, they found Dani’s utterly crashed phone in the dead end in the Narrows. It didn’t look any better.
Duke really hoped they wouldn’t be too late.
With each day it seemed more likely.
********
Bruce: *wants to have private conversation with his son about unknown child he's been working with*
All of the Batfam: Hello there
Duke: I managed to keep Dani secret my family of detectives!
Everyone other than Bruce: I knew for past two weeks, but goood job kid
Random o Twitter: I'm sooo disappointed with Signal for letting Hoopoe fight crime. She is just a little child, she shouldn't have to witness Gotham's worst
Other Random: Have you heard about Robin????? Have you seen teories that Signal is teenager???? With proofs????? Are you mad at child for not taking proper care of the other child????? That's messed up my dude/gal
Yell at Batman
Signal: You act like she isn't personification of feral cat I try to coax home so I can prevent her from getting in trouble. I dare you to try and stop her
Phantom: I do too, 100$ if you manage. It would save me from so much stress
Random: Now, who the f*ck are you?!
(Guess who never touched Twitter with 20 meters stick in her life)
Next part
Tag list: @pickleking8 @mynameisnotlaura
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cluescorner · 2 months
Text
I gave myself a writing challenge and I am fascinated by it
So basically I put the robins in a randomizer to give them a new order/role (because I just...kinda wanted to see what would happen + I like role-reversal AUs) and got results that are giving me a fucking brain blast.
Stephanie, the first sidekick who defines the role
Tim, the sidekick who dies and comes back wrong
Dick, the sidekick who saves Batman from himself
Damian, the sidekick who was never supposed to be a sidekick but would go on to prove everyone wrong
Jason, the youngest sidekick who is still the Kid Wonder
...So this is fucking wild. I've got some ideas and several of these fit perfectly (Dick's role is pretty similar to his one in canon), but some of these are fucking INCREDIBLE to explore (Steph being the first Robin is something I never even considered but tbh I kinda love it).
I probably won't write a fic or anything because tbh I don't like publishing my writing that much, but I might expand this into a full AU and post about it. I might randomize other stuff too (ie, stuff that I cannot change vs stuff that I cannot keep the same) but this fucking rules as a starting point.
#uhhh what am I calling this??#randomizedrobinsau#stephanie brown#oh my god I am so excited to figure out how tf to write this.#because she's my favorite of these characters and having HER be the first sidekick + the one who has a mentor/older sister relationship#with the others?? kickass. though I'll probably keep her and Tim's relationship as 'dating-then-exes' because I think it's funny#and then SHE can be the Robin who Tim got fixated on + figured out her identity?? holy fuck and then the angst of Tim later dying#Tim Drake#tbh I kinda wish he'd gotten a different position because 'sidekick who dies' Tim has kinda been done a lot with the standard#reverse robin aus. But it'll still be fun to write. Definitely going the Joker Junior route with this because Batman Beyond kicks ass#Dick Grayson#He'll honestly probably be the easiest. Like...his role has not changed much outside of being younger/not the one who defines this#But I still think it'll be good to see how well I know Dick beyond his eldest brother thing (which is my best way of relating to him)#Damian al ghul#damian wayne#oh this is gonna kick ass#Bruce does not want his son to be a sidekick but Damian just kinda forces his way into that role#and everybody doubts him because of his history with the league but he later proves himself more than capable#to the point that he can set out mostly on his own and still thrive#Jason Todd#Jason being the baby of the family is also something I have never thought about but holy shit it could kick ass#I really hope that I don't roll 'Jason must die' or 'Robin 5 must die' on the randomizer. I just kinda want Jason to live this time#But unfortunately I double-screwed him because he's on the 'must happen' wheel twice now. I did not think these prompts through#TBH I am so happy that none of them rolled their OG roles. because that would have been so fucking boring
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