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#As I say on my main blog… ‘Everything happens for a reason’

rise-of-the-ancients · 1 year

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I read the recent chapter of your book story. I have to ask: is Blue a fortune teller or something? I have to know! I’m on the edge of my seat

😈

Y’all will just have to wait and see!

#Hyperlink is there to the story in case you want to refer to it again #As I say on my main blog… ‘Everything happens for a reason’#terios the titan #the blue ancient #mystery anon

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heloflor · 6 months

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You know, considering how many posts I recently made about Movie Peach and how negative they are, there’s something I feel the need to clarify since I wouldn’t be surprised if people had some assumptions and I don’t want words I didn’t say being put into my mouth (Tl;Dr at the end):

As a completely original character, fully detached from everything other than the movie, I have no issues with Movie Peach. She’s badass in a fun way, spunky, has a few cute faces, and I especially appreciate how despite being a strong female character stereotype she’s very supportive of Mario and builds him up rather than putting him down, it makes her likeable and their relationship very cute.

And yes, this is the way I perceived her from the get-go, but only mentioned it in my movie reaction post made all the way back when said movie came out, hence needing to say it again now. To quote that post: “Least favorite character is DK. It could’ve been Peach but my issues with her stem from how different she is from her games counterpart. If you take her movie character as a brand-new character rather than a game adaptation, she’s actually pretty great as a guide and strong mentor.” And while there are things in this post I now disagree with, this part remains my current opinion.

So yeah, as an original character, she’s pretty great...but that’s also the issue.

Movie Peach is not an original character. She’s supposed to be an adaptation of a pre-existing character who already has her own personality. And as an adaptation, Movie Peach fails at every level. Not only that, but several dialogues keep hyping her up in a way that comes off as Illuminations looking down on Games Peach, you know, the character their own Peach is supposed to be an adaptation of.

That’s why I take such issue with Movie Peach. It’s not the character itself, it’s how bad of an adaptation she is. And if I did my job correctly, every single time I talk negatively of her in my posts, it’s about her as an adaptation specifically. The only instance of me being an ass for no reason is in my table comparison post where I call her a dumbass, which I point out in the tags to be me throwing shade and not something I actually believe.

Now I also want to say that I hate Movie Peach for what she represents and the consequences of her existence on Peach’s character and her perception by the public, so to keep it short I’m going with bullet points:

It annoys me a lot that a multi-million dollars company couldn’t be bothered to adapt her character properly, especially since they apparently closely worked with Nintendo and the concept art very much show them who Peach is as a person (the one where she’s encouraging Mario to fight DK reminds me of the 86 Anime where she keeps having Mario fight her battles while powerless to defend herself; also it’s funny how in the art of Games Peach reacting to Movie Peach it’s obvious the artist had no idea what personality Movie Peach has). The fact she’s a favorite character of mine doesn’t help and makes me feel robbed from seeing a beloved character on the big screen for the first time. And obviously them low-key insulting her by hyping up Movie Peach makes it worse.

Even before getting into the fandom I knew that Peach isn’t the most well-liked character, with many gamers especially finding her bland and boring. This was already sad on its own, but now those same people are praising a character who’s completely different from her for being “so much better” or “finally giving her a personality”. It sucks. Games Peach deserves better than that.

With those things in mind I don’t think I need to explain why the fact this characterization is possibly bleeding out into the games is something I dread. Now I can live with a cover art change, but if they change her actual character I’m going to scream. Especially if they only do it to Peach and no other character. And yes I know some people also pointed out a possible direction change for her voice but 1. for some reason I don’t really care, possibly because she’s been through quite a lot of voice-actors already 2. we only clearly hear her voice in the Showtime trailer during the Kung-Fu part so maybe her voice will differ depending on the costume, it is a stageplay after all, and 3. the Wonder short with Bowser has her let out four noises, one of which has a different tone while the other three keep her usual high octave, so I’m not sure if they truly intend on changing her voice. Haven’t played Wonder yet tho so I can’t speak to all her other voicelines.

Hopefully this will be my last post about this outside of answering asks and reblogs as I’m always open to discussions/debates. I don’t like bringing negativity and especially not drama to my blog but, considering the extensive rant I made about this, it only feels right to make sure people don’t misinterpret where my issues come from, since I can absolutely understand people seeing my posts and concluding that I hate Movie Peach for who she is rather than what she represents.

Now, instead of being negative about Movie Peach I’d rather focus on being positive about Games Peach, mostly through the fics I’m working on.

Tl;Dr: Movie Peach would be genuinely great as an original character but alas she was put inside the skin of someone with a completely different personality from hers. And it's very hard to look past this given the consequences of Movie Peach's existence on how people percieve Peach as a whole now on top of a possible change in her games character.

#Super Mario #Princess Peach #Movie Peach #Mario Movie #Flor talks #long post #yeah I'm getting a bit more personal in my explanations here; it's not an analysis post like the other ones after all #but thing is the main reason why I take such issue is BECAUSE I love the character so it feels personal #I mean I wouldn't be talking so extensively about a bad adaptation of a character if I didn't care about them #oh and for those asking what did DK do; I just don't like his character archetype #tbh I feel like an ass rn for complaining about such trivial stuff when a LITERAL GEN/OCIDE is taking place; and things are getting worse #but I want to put the whole comparison thing behind and this is the last info that needed to be said; so it needs to be posted now #and I mean it this time when saying it's the last post outside of answering asks; I said everything I had to say #(but yeah I don't like bringing politics into my blog as I want it to be a place to enjoy fandom content #but what's happening right now in pales/tine is beyond horrifying #and the fact politicians are using 'we don't want to be called bigots' to justify their inaction is utterly disgusting #just admit you can't be bothered to help instead of hiding behind false political correctness)

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cybernaght · 9 months

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The fandom echo chamber: fanon, microanalysis and conspiracy brain

As someone who has been in fandom spaces, on and off, for 20 years, I find some fascinating trends popping up in the last decade that I thought to be fandom-specific but clearly aren’t. So, I would like to do a little examination of where those things come from, how they are engaged with, and what it says about the way we consume media. This is a think piece, of sorts, with my brain being the main source. As such, we will spend some time down the memory lane of a fandom-focused millennial.

This is largely brought about by Good Omens. But it’s also not really about Good Omens at all.

Part one. Fanon.

The way we see characters in any story is always skewed by our very selves. This is a neutral statement, and it does not have a value judgement. It’s simply unavoidable. We recognise aspects of them, love aspects of them, and choose aspects of them to highlight based entirely on our own vision of the universe.

Recognition comes into this. There is a reason so many protagonists of romance novels have a “blank slate” problem. Even when they do not, we love characters who are like us or versions of us that we would like to be. And when we say “we”, I also mean, “me”.

(I remember very clearly this realisation hit me after a whole season of Doctor Who with writing which I hated utterly when I questioned why I still clung so incredibly hard to Clara Oswald as my favourite companion. Then I looked at myself in the mirror. Oh. Well. That would do it, wouldn’t it?)

Then, there is projection, and, again, this is a neutral statement. Projection exists, and it is completely normal and, dare I say it, valid way of engaging with — well, anything. Is the character queer? Trans? Neurodivergent? Are they in love? Do they like chocolate? Are they a cat person? Well, yes, if this is what the text says, but if the text does not say anything… You tell me. Please, do tell me. Because, in that moment of projection, they are yours.

And then, there is fandom osmosis, and that is the most fascinating one of them all, the one that is not very easy to note while you are inside the echo chamber. It’s the way we collectively, consciously or not, make decisions on who or what the characters are, what their relationships are, and what happens to them.

(Back when I was writing egregiously long Guardian recaps on this blog I actually asked if Shen Wei’s power being learning actually was stated anywhere in the canon of the show. Because I had no idea. I have read and reread dozen of fanfics where that is the case, and at some point through enough repetition, it became reality.)

We are all kind of making our own reality here, aren’t we?

Back when things were happening in a much less centralised manner - in closed livejournal groups, and forums of all shapes and sizes - I don’t remember there being quite as much universally agreed upon fanon. Frankly, I don’t remember much of universally agreed upon anything. But now, everything is in one place: we have this, and we have AO3, and it’s wonderful, it really is so much easier to navigate, but it’s also one gigantic reality-shifting echo chamber, with blogs, reblogs, trends, and rituals.

Accessibility plays its part, too. If you were, say, in Life on Mars (UK) fandom between seasons, and you wanted to post your speculation fic, you had to have had an account, and then find and gain access to one of the bigger groups (lifein1973 was my poison, but ymmv), and then, if you feel brave you may post it, but also, you may want to do so from your alt account if you wanted to keep yours separate, and then you would have to go through the whole process again. And I’m not saying that fan creations then were somehow inherently better for it than fan creations now (although Life on Mars Hiatus Era is perhaps a bad example - because some of the Speculation Fic there was breathtaking), but there is something to say about the ease of access that made the fandoms go through a big bang of sorts.

(I mean, come on, I can just come here and post this - and I am certain people will read it, and this blog is a pandemic cope baby about Chinese television for goodness sake.)

The canon transformations that happen in the fandom echo chamber truly are fascinating to witness as someone who is more or less a fandom butterfly. I get into something, float around for a bit, then get into something else and move on. I might come back eventually when the need arises, but I don’t sustain a hiatus mind-state. This means that when I float away and return, I find some very intriguing stuff.

Let’s actually look at Good Omens here. Season two aired, and I found it spectacular in its cosy and anguished way; deliberately and intelligently fanfic-y in its plot building; simple but subversive, and so very tender. (I will have to circle back to this eventually, because, truly, I love how deliberately it takes the tropes and shatters them - it’s glorious). And, to me - a person who read the book, watched the first season, hung around AO3 for a few weeks and moved on - absolutely on-point in terms of characterisation.

So imagine my surprise when the fandom disagreed so vehemently that there are actual multi-tiered theories on how characters were not in possession of their senses. Nothing there, in my mind, ever contradicted any of the stated text, as it stood. This remained a strange little mystery until I did what I always do when I flutter close to an ongoing fandom.

I loaded AO3 and sorted the existing fic by popularity. And there it was, all there: the actual earth-shattering mutual devotion of the angel and the demon; willingness to Fall; openness and long heart-aching confession speeches. There was all of the fanon surrounding Aziraphale and Crowley, which, to me, read as out of character, and to one for whom they became the reality over the last four years, read as truth.

Again, only neutral statements here. This is not a bad thing, and neither this is a good thing, this is just something that happens, after a while, especially when there are years for the fandom-born ideas to bounce around and stew. I can’t help but think that so much of what we see as real in spaces such as this one is a chimaera of the actual source and all the collective fan additions which had time and space to grow, change, develop, and inspire, reverberating over and over again, until the echoes fill the entirety of the space.

Eventually, this chimaera becomes a reality.

Part two. Microanalysis

Here are my two suppositions on the matter:

1. Some writers really love breadcrumb storytelling.

Russel T Davies, for instance, on his run of Doctor Who (and, if you are reading it much later - I do mean the original one), loved that technique for his seasonal arcs. What is a Bad Wolf? Who is Harold Saxon? Well, you can watch very very carefully, make a theory, and see it proven right or wrong by the end of the season.

Naturally, mystery box writers are all about breadcrumb storytelling: your Losts and your Westworlds are all about giving you snippets to get your brain firing, almost challenging you to figure things out just ahead of the reveal.

2. We, as humans, love breadcrumbs.

And why wouldn’t we? Breadcrumbs are delicious. They are, however, a seasoning, or a coating. They are not the meal.

Too much metaphor?

Let’s unpack it and start from the beginning.

Pattern recognition colours every aspect of our lives, and it colours the way we view art to a great extent. I think we truly underestimate how much it’s influenced by our lived experiences.

If you are, broadly speaking, living somewhere in Western/North-Western Europe in the 14th century, and you see a painting in which there is a very very large figure surrounded by some smaller figures and holding really tiny figures, you may know absolutely nothing about who those figures are, but you know that the big figure is the Important One, and the small ones are Less Important Ones, and the tiny ones are In Their Care. You know where your reverence would lie, looking at this picture. And, I imagine, as someone living in the 14th century, you may be inspired to a sense of awe looking at this composition, because in the world you live in, this is how art works.

If you, on the other hand, watch a piece of recorded media and see the eyes of two characters meet as the violins swell, you know what you are being told at that moment. You don’t have to have a film degree to feel a sort of way when you see a green-tinged pallet used, when cross-cuts use juxtaposing images, or notice where your focus is pulled in any given shot. This stuff - this recognition of patterns - has been trained into us by the simple fact that we live in this time, on this planet, and we have been doing so long enough to have engaged recorded media for a period of time.

As humans, we notice things. Our brains flare up when they see something they recognise, and then we seek to find other similar details and form a bigger picture. This often happens unconsciously, but sometimes it does not. Sometimes we do it on purpose: finding breadcrumbs in stories is a little bit like solving a mystery. It allows us to stretch that brain muscle that puts two and two together. It makes us feel clever.

So yes, we love breadcrumbs, and, frankly, quite a lot of storytelling takes advantage of this. It’s very useful for foreshadowing, creating thematic coherence, or introducing narrative parallels and complexity. It’s useful for nudging the viewer into one or the other emotional direction, or to cue them into what will happen in the next moment, or what exactly is the one important detail they should pay attention to.

Because this is something media does intentionally, and something we pick up both consciously and not, it is very hard to know when to stop. We don't really ever know when all of the breadcrumbs have been collected. It becomes very easy to get carried away. There is a very specific kind of pleasure in digging into content frame by frame, soundbite by soundbite, chasing that pleasure of finding.

But it is almost never breadcrumbs all the way down. They are techniques to help us focus on the main event: the story. I truly believe those who make media want it to reach the widest possible audience, and that includes all of us who like to watch every single thing ever created with our Media Analysis Goggles on and those who are just here to enjoy the twists and turns of the story at the pace offered to them. And I think, sometimes in our chase to collect and understand every little clue we forget that media is not made to just cater for us.

One can call it missing a forest for the trees. But I would hate to mix my metaphors, so let’s call it missing a schnitzel for the breadcrumbs.

Part three. The Conspiracy Brain.

If you are there with me, in the midst of the excited frenzy, chasing after all those delicious breadcrumbs, then patterns can grow, merge together, and become all-encompassing theories. Let’s call them conspiracy theories, even though this is not what they truly are.

So, why do we believe in conspiracy theories?

One, Because We Have Been Lied To.

All conspiracies start with distrust.

If you are in fandom spaces - especially if you are in fandom spaces which revolve around a queer fictional couple - especially-especially if you have been in such spaces for a period of time, you have most certainly been lied to at one point or another.

We don’t even have to talk about Sherlock - and let’s not do that - but do you remember Merlin? Because I remember Merlin. Specifically, I remember the publicity surrounding the first season, with its weaponised usage of “bromance” and assertions that this whole thing is a love story of sorts, and then the daunting realisation that this was all a stunt, deliberately orchestrated to gather viewership.

And, because we were lied to in such a deliberate manner for such an extensive period of time, I genuinely believe that it forever altered our pattern recognition habits, because what was this if not encouragement to read into things? Now we are trained to read between the lines or see little cries for help where they might not be. Because we were told, over and over again, that we should.

(Yes, I think we are all existing in these spaces coloured by the trauma of queer-bating. I am, however, looking forward to a world where I can unlearn all of that.)

Two, Cognitive Dissonance.

The chain reaction works a bit like this: the world is wrong - it can’t possibly be wrong by coincidence - this must be on purpose - someone is responsible for it.

Being Lied To is a preamble, but cognitive dissonance is where it all originates. In so many cross-fandom theories I have noticed a four-step process:

A) this is not good

B) this author could not have made a mistake

C) this must be done on purpose

D) here is why

(Funny thing is, I have been on the receiving end of the small conspiracy spiral, and it is a very interesting experience. Not relevant to this conversation is the fact that a lot of my job revolves around storytelling. What is relevant is that my hobbies also revolve around storytelling. And one of them is DnD. Now, imagine my genuine shock when one of the players I am currently writing a campaign for noticed a small detail that did not make a logical sense within the complexity of the world, and latched on to it as something clearly indicating some kind of a secret subplot. Their thinking process also went a bit like this: this detail is not a good piece of writing — this DM knows how to tell stories well — this is obviously there on purpose. It was not there on purpose. I created a clumsy shorthand. I erred, in that pesky manner humans tend to. And, seeing this entire thought process recited to me directly in the moment, I felt somewhere between flattered and mortified.)

This whole line of thinking, I think, exists on a knife’s edge between veneration and brutal criticism, relentlessly dissecting everything “wrong”, with a reverent “but this is deliberate” attached to it like a vice, because it is preferable to a simple conclusion that the author let you down, in one way or another.

Three, Intentionality

I believe that there is no right or wrong way of engaging with stories, regardless of their medium, and assuming no one gets hurt in the process. While in a strictly academic way, there is a “correct” way of reading (and reading into) media, we here are largely not academics but consumers; consumption is subjective.

However, this all changes when intentionality is ascribed.

The one I find particularly fascinating is the intentionality of “making it bad on purpose” because, as open-minded as I intend to always be, this just does not happen.

It certainly does not happen in long-form media. Even in the bread-crumb mystery box-type long-form media.

When television programs underdeliver, they also underperform, and then they get cancelled.

If all the elements of Westworld Season 4 that did not sit together in a completely satisfactory way were written deliberately as some sort of deconstruction for the final season to explore, then it failed because that final season will now never come.

(There will likely never be a Secret Fourth Episode.)

And look, I am not here to refute your theories. Creativity is fun, and theorising is fantastic.

But, perhaps, when the line of thought ventures into the “bad on purpose” territory, it could be recognised for what it is: disappointment and optimism, attempting to coexist in a single space. And I relate to that, I do, and I am sorry that there is even a need for this line of thinking. It’s always so incredibly disappointing that a creator you believed to be devoid of flaws makes something that does not hit in the way you hoped it would. It’s pretty heartbreaking.

Unfortunately, people make mistakes. We are all fallible that way.

Four, Wildfire.

Then, when the crumbs are found, a theory is crafted, and intentionality is ascribed, all that needs to happen is for it to catch on. And hey, what better place for it than this massive hollow funnel that we exist in, where thoughts, ideas and interpretations reverberate so much they become inextricable from the source material in collective consciousness.

Conspiracy theories create alternate realities, very much like we all do here.

So where are we now?

I am not here to tell you what is right and what is wrong; what is true, and what is not. We are all entitled to engage with anything we wish, in whichever way we wish to do it. This is not it, at all.

All I am saying is… listen.

Do you hear that echo?

I do.

#fandom thoughts #fanon #good omens #good omens 2 #bbc sherlock #merlin bbc #think piece #it's been years and I still have no idea how to tag #conspiracy theories #fandom content #all fandoms

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astrobiscuits · 5 months

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Solar Return obs 1

Before we start...

For the best results, always ALWAYS compare your Solar Return chart with your Natal chart. For pinpointing the exact timing when something will happen in your love life, look up at your upcoming Venus Return chart. When does it start? Now compare it with your next Solar Return. If you have planets in your 7th house in Solar Return, notice if they are proeminent in your current Venus Return chart. Bingo! You've just found out when these planets are going to get activated (around the date of the Venus Return chart)

Without further do, let's roll the SR observations!💗

🦩 Jupiter in 4th house indicates moving abroad that year

🦩 While Uranus in 4th house brings sudden, unexpected changes in your home life. Moving to another house? You bet. Redecorating your whole house because you just woke up with the urge to do so? Could be another possibility

🦩 Jupiter trine Venus in SR brings an easiness to manifesting everything you want that year. If Jupiter/Venus is in 2nd house trining the other planet, then you might also get lots of gifts

🦩 Venus in 2nd house also indicates spending more than usual on material possesions that year (compulsive shopping much)

🦩 Sun conjunct Saturn and Venus in 6th house = becoming "that girl". Your main focus will be on building a solid, stable routine for yourself, that also looks aesthetically pleasing

🦩 Stellium in 10th house/11th house = high chance of becoming (internet) famous. Bonus points is Jupiter is involved (i started my blog while my current SR has a 10th house stellium and i have to thank you guys for showing such big support for this blog🥹 thank you)

🦩 Jupiter in 9th house can indicate travelling abroad for the purpose of experimenting different lifestyles (For ex. you visit Guatemala because you want to experience what is like to be a Guatemalian - you want to try all their traditional dishes, learn their traditional dances and open up your mind to a different culture)

🦩 Another meaning of Jupiter in 9th house is that you might go abroad for college or if you start college in your homecountry, then you're probably going to major in foreign languages, philosophy or religion

🦩 Pluto in 4th house could mean uncovering a family secret. Don't be surprised if you find out that you're adopted or you have family members alive that you didn't know about👀

🦩 Moon in 4th house means that you'll feel much more nostalgic that year. You might spend more time with your mother than usual, reminescence on your childhood memories or look through old photos of you and your family

🦩 If you're in a relationship and you've got Neptune in 7th house in your next SR, then i'm sorry to disappoint you, but expect a year where you might question your partner's loyalty. I'm not saying your partner is going to cheat, but for some reason you might feel more suspicious of them than usual

🦩 Mars in 8th house = expect more sex than usual lol

🦩 If Pluto squares Mars and one of these planets is in the 4th house/5th house/7th house/10th house/11thouse, beware of power plays and toxic dynamics in your family/friendships/relationship (for 4th,5th,7th or 11th house) or at your workplace (for 10th house)

🦩 Moon in 12th house indicates that you're going to be more secretive with your emotions. You won't tell people how you feel and at times you might be confused about your own emotions, because you'll have the tendency to surpress them

🦩 With Jupiter conjuncting Ascendant (doesn't matter if it's in the 12th house or 1st house), expect to be constantly blessed by the Universe without doing anything. One of the most luckiest placements you could have in your SR

🦩 Neptune trine Mercury indicates a high chance of coming up with a creative masterpiece that year (it can be in any domain: arts, music, writing, acting, u name it)

🦩 Saturn in 2nd house can indicate going on a diet that year

🦩 Mars in 3rd house indicates being more argumentative that year than usual. You might speak at a faster pace or speak before thinking twice

🦩 Indicators in SR for meeting your future spouse:

SR Juno conjuncts SR Sun/Moon/Venus

SR Juno conjuncts SR Descendant

SR Juno conjuncts one of your natal, personal planets

Natal Juno conjuncts one of your SR planets

If the 5th house/7th house is involved, then you'll also start dating them/be in a relationship with them that year!!

🦩 If you've been struggling with fear of dying, Sun in 12th house indicates a year when you'll probably overcome this fear. During this year, you're more prone to dive deeper into what happens after death, which will naturally ease your anxiety

🦩 I had Capricorn rising with Pluto and Saturn in 1st house this year and it was ROUGH. Capricorn risings sets the theme for the year as a year with hardships, obstacles and difficulties in achieving happiness. Saturn in 1st house brings a lower than usual sense of self-esteem, while Pluto in 1st house tells us about a major change when it comes to how others perceive us. This change isn't as sudden as the changes Uranus brings, more like something that has been boiling for a while in the dark and now it finally comes up to the surface. This year i decided to pursue astrology as my (future) career and i've also told people in my life about it. I felt like i was truly reborn compared to where i was last year

#regarding venus return #i had uranus in my 7th house in my 2022 SR and it was proeminent in my venus return for 2022 too #i was in a situationship around my birthday and it ended out of nowhere #AROUND MY VENUS RETURN CHART'S DAY (cuz i don't remember the exact date)#if astrology isn't real #then idk what is #astrology #astro #astro community #astro observations #astro placements #astro notes #astrology notes #solar return #astroblr #astrology observations #astrology community #astrologyblr #astrology blog

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linawritestwst · 1 year

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(a very late valentine's day special) how twst characters would fall in love with you!

okay, so when i created this blog last year, i didn't have much time to write something for valentine's day, but i thought that i should try and write something for it this year!

at first i wanted to write something like "how twst characters would confess their love for you", i wanted it to be a reference to the "how twst characters would react to your love confession" series i made back when i just created this blog and i still only have the heartslabyul, savanaclaw and octavinelle hcs. i am sorry. but to be honest, i didn't have a lot of ideas and it was hard to find inspiration, so i decided to go with something different. but who knows, maybe i'll actually write it one day! also i know that this idea is very basic and i'm sorry.

this post has all nrc students (except ortho) + rsa and nbc characters, so GET READY BECAUSE THIS IS GONNA BE A VERY LONG POST.

also i'm having some really bad internet problems rn and even though i can use mobile data, EDITING ON MY PHONE IS A PAIN. I CAN'T DO ANYTHING. and idk when wifi will start working again and i'll be able to use my computer again, so sorry if this post looks weird, has typos and stuff like that, I JUST WANT TO POST IT ALREADY. I'M SICK OF SEEING IT IN MY DRAFTS.

heartslabyul.

riddle rosehearts.

♡ he doesn't understand you at all. you should be afraid of him, you should actually hate him for what he did and how he acted earlier. he was the first to overblot in front of you, he's sure it was quite a traumatic memory from you. and it's not like he treated you better than he treated other nrc students, he was just as willing to punish you for any "misbehavior". so why.. why do you still want you and riddle to become closer? you simply don't think that riddle actually had bad intentions, he just genuinely thought that everything will be okay if he just follows the rules and makes others follow them. so.. you don't think he's a bad person or anything like that. just someone who has a lot of issues and doesn't know how to deal with them properly. and after you say that.. riddle starts feeling very strange.

♡ falling in love with you feels so sudden, riddle doesn't remember being this interested in you when he first met you. he has to admit that he even kind of.. looked down on you back then and didn't think you were that special. though the case of you being the only magicless student here really was special. he also was angry at you because of you being so close with ace and deuce.. but now, he feels different. as he learns more about you and starts getting used to your company, he realizes that he actually likes you a lot. he even admires you, because it must be hard to deal with so much stuff as someone who's magicless he's sorry for being the first to overblot btw. he's always here if you need any help.

♡ why did he fall in love with you? well, you're certainly a very smart, strong and kind person, but the main reason was.. he was just happy to be understood by someone. he didn't expect you out of all people to forgive him, but it sure was a nice surprise. you're always here to calm him down when he's close to using his unique magic or yelling at someone for breaking the rules again, however, you don't blame him for acting like that and you say that his feelings are valid, he just has to find a better way to express them and process them. so.. it probably just feels nice to be seen as someone other than a rose-red tyrant.

ace trappola.

♡ as someone who said some pretty bad things about you and grim when you first met.. wow, it feels embarrassing to admit that he has a crush on you now. imagine making fun of a magicless human and then falling in love with them. yeah, that's ace. so, how did it happen? he's not sure when exactly he got feelings for you, it just.. happened. you two became so close, he actually couldn't imagine spending a day without you. everything just feels so boring when you're not around. pranking you or showing off to you or just talking to you makes his day, even if it's just you going "ACE D:<", he loves seeing your reactions.. and maybe, he loves you.

♡ it's hard to notice him acting any different when he's in love with you, but if you pay closer attention, you can see him blushing after you praise him for something or you can notice him asking you to hang out with him more often. he also sometimes freezes for a moment when you call him your friend, it's almost like he's asking you ".. but are you sure you don't wanna be more than friends?". but right after that, he goes back to his usual behavior and he's surprisingly good at hiding his crush on you.

♡ falling in love with you feels fun and kinda sad at the same time, because even though ace tries so hard to act confident and he claims that you love him just as much, he's actually not sure if you love him back or not. he doesn't mind being seen only as a friend, being friends with you is cool, but also.. yeah, he wants more. and he's not sure if he's ready for a serious relationship, considering what he did in the past to that girl he used to date. he knows that he would never do that to you, because you're so much cooler than that girl and you're much more interesting, but he also doesn't want to let you down. but if you do love him back.. he will try his best to treat you right, though it doesn't mean that you will be safe from his teasing and his pranks.

deuce spade.

♡ out of all the heartslabyul boys, i imagine deuce being the one to get a crush on you earlier than all the others. you're just so nice and sweet and understanding.. you also didn't judge him after you heard about his past and even said that you're proud of him for trying to change and become a better person. after that, deuce couldn't get your words out of his head and became extremely loyal to you, he's always here if you need any help and he feels so happy when you praise him or want to spend time with him.

♡ it's very easy to notice him having a crush on you, honestly. he tries really hard to hide it, but he fails and ace laughs at him every time. he can't say anything properly when you compliment him or smile at him and he starts stuttering, giggling like an idiot or he simply runs away and ends up tripping and falling. it makes him even more cute though and you can give him more attention to get more reactions like that from him or you can pretend not to notice on purpose.

♡ falling in love with you feels like something completely new and that's understandable, deuce has never experienced a feeling like this before. and even though at first it was just a very huge crush, now it actually feels like something more deep, it's like.. he really is in love with you. spending the rest of his life with you sounds scary and he's not sure if he's ready for something like this, but when he imagines it, it makes him feel soft and even kind of excited. he will understand if you reject his feelings, he has not the best past, but if you say yes to him, he will try to become the perfect boyfriend for you. he already knew that he wants to become a better person for his mom, but now he has two people in his life that he wants to change for.

cater diamond.

♡ when cater first met you, he thought you were cute but.. that was it. he didn't think much of you, honestly. don't get him wrong, he thought you were very cute and he would love to be friends with you! but.. he really didn't think that he's gonna fall in love with you later. he just enjoyed hanging out with you, talking to you, he loved the way you smile, he loved the way you laugh and.. wait, that's just him thinking you're cute, right? but not, like, in that way, right? because cater doesn't think he's quite ready to admit that he has feelings for you.

♡ cater is not sure how exactly it happened and why he got a crush on you. it's like.. he just feels more safe around you. it's like he can actually show you his real self and you won't judge him. of course, he's still not sure that you would actually be okay with him acting like his real self and he doubts that you would even like that side of his.. but for some reason he still feels like he can trust you. so he may or may not drop a few hints that make you go "cater. dude. are you okay." no, y/n, he's not okay, this poor man needs a hug.

♡ falling in love with you feels exciting and terrifying at the same time. cater feels truly happy when he's with you, he manages to forget about his problems at least for some time and his smile looks a lot more sincere than usual. but he's also.. scared. he doesn't think that you will love him back once you find out about his real personality, maybe you will accept it, sure, but would you really want a boyfriend like that? honestly, he should be grateful for you wanting to spend time with him even when he's being his "fake" self. he shouldn't ask so much from you, he should thank you for even just being friends with him. so whenever cater hears you laugh at his jokes, he feels genuine happiness but only for a second before he remembers that you will most likely never love him as much as he loves you. or will you?..

trey clover.

♡ just like cater, trey thought you were a nice person, but he didn't think you were.. you know.. his future love or something like that. he thought you were cute and he was always there to suggest his help if you needed it, but he really just thought that you two are gonna be friends and that's all. okay, maybe you two will be close friends. like, very close friends. but that's it. trey gave you so much attention and he had a habit to get a little bit too worried about you for no reason at all, but he thought that you're just.. well.. another younger sibling figure to him (your actual age doesn't matter). why else would he care so much about you?

♡ but oh no. it looks like you're actually something more to him. you're not just another younger sibling figure going "trey, i need your help!! ><". he would seriously think that he just likes you platonically and if it wasn't for cater, he would never realize that he actually likes you romantically. so what if he blushes a bit when you compliment his baking. so what if he thinks about you so often that it distracts him from his vice dorm leader duties. so what if he imagined spending the rest of his life with you- okay. okay, he understands what cater means now. maybe he really is in love with you.

♡ falling in love with you feels confusing for sure, but it also feels soft and sweet. trey may be a local mom friend who's always here to help his underclassmen out, but he has no idea what to do with his own feelings. should he just confess to you already or should he wait a bit? wait, do you even love him back? he has so many questions but almost no answers. but if you do love him back, trey will most likely notice it eventually. he's a smart boy, he had no idea that he actually has romantic feelings for you, but if you have a crush on him, he will definitely find out about it and when he does, he might start teasing you even more often.

savanaclaw.

leona kingscholar.

♡ oh boy. this guy definitely didn't expect to fall in love with you. no, he didn't expect to even become friends with you. you were just a weak little herbivore to him, nothing special, nothing out of ordinary. you were very a bit annoying sometimes too. but when you started saying things like "i want to get to know you better" or "i want to talk to you more".. that's when leona got very confused, though he didn't show it. why would you say things like that? what do you even want from him? is it because he's a prince? oh well, sorry to disappoint you, but he's actually a younger- "i just want to know why you're so lazy all the time.".. okay, this wasn't the answer he expected. he will tell you to go away, but don't pay attention to that, he's actually more interested in you now.

♡ leona just can't understand why you're like this. why do you spend so much time with him? why can't you just let him nap in peace? he actually jokes about you having a crush on him once and he expects you to go "h-how can you say things like that so casually!..". but you manage to surprise him again. "well what if i do? what are you gonna do then, huh?" okay, maybe he did underestimate you a little. just a little bit. you're slowly becoming more and more interesting and he hates to admit that he wants to know more about you. why? well.. he wants to know why you're so annoying all the time.

♡ falling in love with you feels weird, but also surprisingly entertaining. leona never knows what you're gonna do next and for some reason he even finds it exciting. he somehow manages to act like a tsundere and flirt with you at the same time. yes, he will go "ugh, why do you have to ruin my day like this" whenever you step on his tail while he's asleep, but he also will say things that make other savanaclaw students think that he's about to confess his feelings for you OR you two are actually already dating. does he know that he's in love with you though?.. he will need some time, but he will eventually realize it. and he's not gonna be happy about it.

ruggie bucchi.

♡ ruggie didn't really pay much attention to you at first, but he has to say that you're really fun to mess with. he never gets bored of seeing your reactions and sometimes he would steal stuff from you just to make you look at him. he knows that it probably sounds weird, but don't worry, he definitely doesn't have a crush on you, haha.. hey, why are you being so kind to him? why do you cook/buy food for him? why do you keep asking him if he needs any help? ah, maybe you just want a favor from him? you want him to help you with something, don't you? why would you have any other reason- "i'm just worried about you, that's all." oh no. oh no he's about to catch feelings.

♡ your kindness scares ruggie a bit, but he also keeps wanting more. he doesn't understand your motives, he doesn't understand why you're so worried about him. you just say things like "oh, i thought you were tired from doing leona's job all day" or "i thought you looked tired, so i just want to help you out, if that's okay". they may sound like nothing special, but ruggie feels weird whenever he hears you say stuff like that. he just jokes about you being too pure for someone like him, but he's actually kind of serious about it. are you sure you want to be friends with him? or.. maybe you're actually in love with him? don't worry, he's just joking around~

♡ falling in love with you feels fun at first, but it slowly starts becoming more and more scary when ruggie realizes just how deep and strong his feelings are. it's not just a small crush, he really is in love with you. he can't stop thinking about you and not a day passes without him wanting to see you. it feels strange to be treated so well without any reason at all, but ruggie just can't say no to your kindness. even though he keeps trying to make it look like it's nothing serious and you're just friends, he's actually this close to crying because he feels like he will never have a chance to be with you and you will never love him as much as he loves you. why would you even have feelings for him anyway?

jack howl.

♡ savanaclaw boys wouldn't find you that special when they first meet you and jack is not an exception. he thought you still have a long way to go and you have to put more effort in what you do. he also thought you looked too weak and "fragile", so he made sure to remind you to train more often, if you can, or to just take better care of yourself. i-it's not like he's worried about you. it just bothers him that you always look so tired all the time and it doesn't look like you get enough sleep too..

♡ however, you manage to impress jack and he's surprised to find out just how hardworking you really are. no matter what happens or how hard your life in twisted wonderland may get, you still try to achieve your goals. sure, you may whine a bit and say that it's unfair for a magicless human like you to go through so much, but you still do what you have to, no matter how weak you look. jack sure finds you more impressive than leona and he doesn't even notice how fast he starts to admire you and even fall in love with you.

♡ falling in love with you doesn't feel like something special because jack isn't even aware of his own feelings at first. he just thinks you're very cool and he respects you a lot and wishes to help you whenever he can. he just always wants to be by your side and support you when you need it. you're much stronger than he thought you were when you two just met, but he still thinks that in a world like twisted wonderland.. you deserve to be protected. and he's more than willing to protect you from whatever life throws at you. he realizes that he's actually in love with you when he notices that he feels a bit weird when you're around. this feeling is warm, but also so confusing.. and whenever you say goodbye to him, he doesn't want you to leave. b-but that's just because he admires you a lot, right?

octavinelle.

azul ashengrotto.

♡ azul didn't think you'd be that useful to him at first. it's not like he can make a deal with you or take your magic.. but still, being friends with a ramshackle prefect might actually help him in the future. so yes, he will try to become closer with you anyway. he's sure it will be easy to make you trust him, he just needs to make you believe that you can rely on him and who wouldn't want to have a friend like azul in such a scary world, especially as a human who has no idea how twisted wonderland works?.. well, it's actually not as easy as azul thought it would be.

♡ sure, you do want to become friends with him, but whenever he tries to help you with whatever you're struggling with (for a price, of course) or he tries to make himself seem as a kind person who genuinely wants to help others, you simply go "thank you, but i'm fine".. what do you mean, you're fine, y/n, he knows what crowley makes you do, just ask azul for help already! but as time passes, azul starts to notice that he actually wants to help you not because he needs you to make a deal with him.. but just because he really does feel bad for you and he wants to make your job at least a bit easier.

♡ falling in love with you feels strange and unexpected, azul wasn't prepared for this at all. he didn't think that he would actually become so attached to you, you were supposed to be another student who he can manipulate, so why do you feel like one of the most important people in his life now? he doesn't think that it's love at first, him thinking of you as his actual friend is already too much for him.. but then his overblot happens. and you forgive him for everything. and you tell him that no matter what, you accept him and even though he still has some.. um.. not so good qualities to work on, you'll be there to help him and support him. okay, maybe he actually is in love with you.

jade leech.

♡ jade thought you were an interesting and unique person right when he met you for the first time, but you were just that: an interesting and unique person. nothing more, nothing less. he would love to know more about you though, so don't be surprised if he starts talking to you more often or asking you more questions. this man wants to study you in a lab, okay. oh, and even though he sure does seem suspicious, he actually doesn't have any ulterior motives, unlike azul. he just can't go "hey, i like you, let's be friends', no, he has to act like his usual self that sometimes seems more dangerous than floyd.

♡ he doesn't even notice falling in love with you, but he sure notices becoming more interested in you for some reason. he always wants to know what you're up to, he wants to know more about your interests and he's always here if you need someone to talk to, whatever the topic is. he only starts thinking more about his feelings for you when floyd mentions jade being "totally in love with you". jade thinks floyd is just joking at first, but then floyd says that he was serious and jade's crush on you is more obvious than he thinks. and the funny thing is that.. jade is surprisingly casual about it. he just goes "oh. so i have a crush on them. okay". he never felt like this before, so he's a little confused, but it's not like he's about to have a breakdown because he just realized he's been in love with you this whole time.

♡ falling in love with you feels sweet and exciting. jade just thought you were a fun person when he first met you, but now it's hard for him to imagine his day without you. you've made him feel emotions he has never/rarely felt before. it's so unusual for him to worry about you, laugh at your jokes or be angry at someone who ruined your day. and trust him, all of those emotions are sincere. he's not pretending, you really made him feel all of this and even though he's not used to feeling this way, he can't wait to find out what else you're going to make him feel.

floyd leech.

♡ just like his twin, floyd already thought you were interesting when he just met you. he always followed you everywhere, he kept pranking you just to see your reaction and he thought that you getting annoyed with him was cute. and he found you even more interesting after he realized that even though he kept messing with you, you still let him hang out with you and didn't ask him to leave. huh, so you actually like his company, shrimpy? well, he's glad to hear that~

♡ floyd's feelings for you don't feel like a crush at all at first. he just thinks you're cute and that's it, really. but for some reason, he really hates it when he has to leave or when you don't give him enough attention. sometimes he takes a break (he doesn't tell azul anything though) from his work at mostro lounge just to hang out with you and he feels bored whenever you're not around. he has no idea why he feels like this, but.. who knows, maybe he really does like you, hehe.

♡ falling in love with you feels fun and full of surprises. floyd has never felt this way before and even though this feeling can be kinda annoying sometimes and it doesn't go away, he wants your relationship to become deeper and he wants to have more fun with you. just being friends is not enough for him anymore. you became an irreplaceable and extremely important part of his world and he hopes you feel the same about him.

scarabia.

kalim al-asim.

♡ kalim is kinda oblivious when it comes to crushes.. no, he's very oblivious. he really does believe he just likes you as a friend and even though it's true at first, as time passes, literally anyone can see that kalim treats you even better than people who he calls his friends. and considering how kind and friendly he is, this guy basically never leaves you alone even for a second and you get gifts from him every single day. he's constantly trying to come up with ways to make you happy and he thinks you have the most beautiful smile in the whole world. but yes, he definitely doesn't have a crush on you <3

♡ you and kalim would most likely have that friends to lovers dynamic. he's very easy to get along with and even though his energetic personality may be overwhelming sometimes, if he sees that you're tired or sad, he will tone it down a bit and ask you what's wrong. if you're not doing so well, he will genuinely worry about you a lot and he's okay with doing anything to make you feel better. he doesn't understand why your happiness matters to him so much, but.. maybe he just doesn't like it when someone is sad. and when YOU are sad, he feels like it's the end of the world and he has to do something about it immediately.

♡ kalim almost doesn't notice falling in love with you. he just thinks your friendship is becoming stronger and that's it. it's okay if he wants to hug you for a little bit longer, that's just because you're his best friend! it's okay if he wants to hold hands with you, he just doesn't want you to get lost and he's worried about you! it's okay if he wants to kiss you- oh. uh.. oh, you know, he means it in a platonic way! it's not like friends can't kiss each other! but if he actually wants to be more than friends with you.. would you be okay with that? wait, what is he even supposed to do with his feelings? maybe he should ask jamil for advice..

jamil viper.

♡ jamil's case is actually even worse because if kalim at least knows that you two have a good relationship and that you are friends, jamil is like "?? idk who you are to me. can i trust you. can i call you my friend". he thought you were okay when he first met you, but didn't pay too much attention to you, though he certainly appreciated you being.. you know, a more "normal" person than most nrc students (especially kalim). he actually feels like he can rely on you, honestly. he won't talk to you too much though, who knows what you're really like jamil if you're hiding something it doesn't mean that everyone around you is like that

♡ jamil doesn't understand why he feels so strange around you. at first he feels like he can trust you, even though he still tries to stop himself and tells himself that you can easily stab him in the back. and why are you so nice to him? you're probably just trying to become friends because you think that having a close relationship with someone like him could be useful, right? well, he's not gonna fall for that. and stop praising him all the time already. he told you that he's just a vice dorm leader and his abilities are not that special- wait, why does he feel good after hearing your compliments. oh no. oh no, he doesn't want you to stop.

♡ falling in love with you feels scary and jamil doesn't want to admit that he sees you not only as a friend (though he won't tell you that), but also as someone who he loves and wants to be with. you actually listen to him, you give him love and attention that he always wanted and you recognize his talents, but you still think that they are not the only good things about him and jamil is also just a very good person who deserves to be loved. jamil doesn't feel like he's ready to open up to you just yet, but he really doesn't want to miss a chance to finally find someone who will care about him as much as he cares about them.

pomefiore.

vil schoenheit.

♡ your relationship with vil definitely had a rough start. he criticized you a lot, he told you to take better care of your appearance, health and all of that. you felt like this guy hates you and tried to avoid him as best as you could. however, you were wrong and even though vil still thought that you could do better and you have some things to work on, he didn't hate you. in fact, he thought you were an interesting person who has their own talents and abilities, but they have to work on them more so that they can achieve their goals faster. so yeah, he basically tried to motivate you, but he probably didn't do a very good job.

♡ other people can notice vil giving you quite a lot of attention but not in a good way. it means that he's especially harsh on you. most students start to agree with you and think that the guy hates you, but his vice dorm leader knows that it's not true at all. rook is sure that vil is being so rude just because he believes you're better than most nrc students and he wants you to reach your full potential. but wow, it really feels like vil is almost obsessed with you. rook mentions that vil almost never stops talking about you lately and vil says that it's not true- no, rook, don't even joke about vil having a crush on you.

♡ even though vil sure has a lot of braincells, he almost doesn't notice falling in love with you as well. he really thinks he's just mad at you for not "trying hard enough", but this guy actually cares about you a lot. it may seem like he's angry at you and he hates you, but he's actually just very worried. what do you mean your sleep schedule doesn't even exist. go to sleep already, don't you know what happens to your skin if you don't get enough rest?? no, he's not worried about your health, it's just. uh. anyway, what about your hair-

rook hunt.

♡ finally. finally someone who actually knows they have feelings for you. though it may take some time for rook to realize that he's in love with you and not just admiring your beauty, he still would understand his feelings for you earlier than most characters here. he understands how romance works better than them, okay. very chad behavior of him sure, he thinks all people are beautiful in their own way, but you feel a little bit more special to him. his heart beats faster around you and he finds it hard to take his eyes off you. he never felt like this before around other students or people in general.

♡ rook would be very affectionate with you, however, he would take his time and wouldn't confess his feelings for you that early. he wants his confession to feel unique and special, he has to be prepared for that moment! he also needs some time to learn more about you. he wants to get to know you better, he wants to know what kind of person you are, how you see the world and he hopes that this way he will be able to predict your reaction to his confession. but of course, he doesn't do it just to earn your trust, he really is curious and wants to know more. you're just so interesting to him, he wants to know what exactly made him fall in love with you this hard.

♡ falling in love with you feels like a fairytale. it's so magical and exciting, rook wishes he never stops feeling this way. you are everything to him, all of his thoughts are about you and he's not complaining. he may joke about you distracting him from everything else, but he's actually more than happy and he doesn't mind being obsessed with you at all. yes, he may still compliment other people's beauty and talents, but don't worry, he has eyes only for you and he's more loyal to you than you think he is.

epel felmier.

♡ unless you make fun of his height, call him cute too often or refuse to take him seriously, epel wouldn't mind your company at all. who knows, maybe you two can actually become friends. and you do become friends! how fun! epel didn't expect to get along with you so easily, but he's more than okay with it. he's glad to have someone he can trust enough to talk about his true feelings and show his true personality to. he's more open and honest with you and he feels like you would never judge him no matter what he does or says.

♡ this feeling slowly starts turning into deep love and affection for you, though epel doesn't seem to notice that and still thinks you're just a friend to him. but he does notice feeling a bit more anxious around you now. why? well, it's like.. he wants to become better for you. he wants to impress you. h-he doesn't have a reason for that, really. he just.. wants you to notice how great and talented he really is. he wants you to praise him and smile at hiim while saying that what he did was amazing. again, he doesn't have a reason for that. totally.

♡ falling in love with you feels sweet and bitter at the same time. epel feels safe when you're around and he feels like he can tell you anything, but he's also scared that you actually don't think he's that special. he does slowly start to realize he's in love with you and that makes him feel even more scared. he needs to become a better person for you, he needs to become stronger, he wants to become someone who can protect you, who can impress you and who you can rely on. so forgive him for taking some time to work on that, he promises that he will tell you the truth when he's ready.

ignihyde.

idia shroud.

♡ idia genuinely doesn't understand why you're so nice to him. it actually scares him a little and he never knows what to expect from you. you're not as extroverted as some other nrc students, like kalim for example, but you still always run to idia whenever you see him and try to talk to him more. what do you want from him? you're just doing this out of pity, aren't you? it's okay, you don't have to give him so much attention, idia loves being alone, also he has online friends, so it's not like he's a complete loner or anything.

♡ you still try to get to know him better. you just want to help idia get out of his shell and become more confident. you don't think that being an introvert is a bad thing at all, but you still think that idia should start socializing more anyway. and you're sure that idia wants to make more friends as well, he's just afraid of being rejected. no, idia, you don't think that all these people are normies, you're just scared of them and trying to come up with an excuse so that you don't have to talk to them.

♡ falling in love with you feels sudden and predictable at the same time. of course idia shroud would fall for a person who's always there to support him and genuinely wants to become friends with him. he's affection-starved, okay? he may say that you can be really annoying sometimes, but he actually waits for you to text him or say hi to him every single day and if for some reason you can't talk to him, he feels lost and.. sad, even? please, don't leave him alone.. he knows that he's most likely too lame or boring for you, but he can't stand the thought of you leaving him.

diasomnia.

malleus draconia.

♡ i wouldn't call it love at first sight, but right after malleus met you, he knew that you're gonna become someone special to him. you didn't know anything about him. you didn't know his real name, status, his real identity. you didn't care about his reputation and you simply thought he seemed like an interesting person to talk to. he also seemed a little lonely too and you really could use a friend in a world like this, so yeah, that's how all of it started. he thought that the nickname you gave him was cute too.

♡ malleus gets used to your company too quickly. in fact, he can't imagine what he would do if you suddenly disappeared or simply lost interest in him. he got used to your kindness, to your smile, to your laugh, to your affection. his world becomes more warm and fun when you're around. but of course, he doesn't want this relationship to be too one-sided. he would do anything to protect you, help you or simply make you smile. you deserve the same happiness that you give him.

♡ falling in love with you feels soft and sweet, but also.. scary. malleus feels so happy when you're around, whenever he wakes up, he immediately thinks of you. you're everything to him. so if he loses you.. he will lose everything. he can't let you leave him. of course, he knows that you come from a different world and twisted wonderland isn't your home. he knows that you will leave him sooner or later. but.. is it selfish of him to want you to stay here for as long as possible? maybe you don't even have to leave?

lilia vanrouge.

♡ lilia thought you were cute right when he first met you. your reactions to his sudden appearances were so funny, it was hard for him to stop surprising you like this. at first your relationship dynamic was just like that, lilia kept surprising/scaring you, you screamed, he laughed and asked you to not be mad at him, he just likes your reactions too much. but as he started learning more about you, he realized that there are so many things he likes about you and it's not just you being an adorable scaredy-cat.

♡ for some reason, even though you wouldn't be able to tell from his behavior, lilia feels very calm when you're around. it's like his thoughts about his past and everything that he had to go through during his very, VERY long life can finally give him a break when he's with you. he doesn't have to worry about that, he can just stay here in present. and actually, he likes staying in present much more now thanks to you. but you're so naive, so innocent, so fragile, lilia thinks it's cute but he's also extremely worried about you because of that. you weren't made for this world. no matter how much you get praised for your job as a prefect, twisted wonderland is still too much for someone like you.

♡ lilia falls in love with you slowly, but when it happens, it feels so overwhelming, lilia has no idea what to do. he knows that having a romantic relationship with you is probably not the best idea considering that you'll have to leave this world someday and even if you don't.. he also doesn't have much time left. but if it's possible, if there's at least a tiny chance of him being in a happy relationship with you, he doesn't want to miss that chance. he may not have much time left, but he would do anything to spend all of that time with you.

silver.

♡ you and silver become friends surprisingly quickly. he knows he can trust you to wake him up when he falls asleep again, even though you think he looks very cute when he's asleep and you want him to get enough rest. whenever silver blames himself for being too lazy or incompetent, you're always here to remind him that he's already doing his best and he doesn't have to be so harsh on himself. he definitely will become a great knight one day no matter what, you believe in him!

♡ your kind words and your support make silver enjoy hanging out with you too much. he lets you watch him train, he finds it relaxing to take a nap when you're there with him and you run your fingers through his hair while he's asleep. even though he seems like a chill guy, he's scared of letting his father and his master down, but he always can rely on you when doesn't feel confident enough and he needs someone to tell him that everything is gonna be fine and lilia and malleus are already proud of him. and you're proud of him too.

♡ falling in love with you feels like a dream that he doesn't want to wake up from. he never thought his life was that bad, but it surely got better thanks to you. he wants to thank you for everything you did for him, he wants to protect you from all the dangers of this world. he knows that he wanted to become a knight so that he can repay lilia and malleus, but now.. he wants to be your knight as well. no, please, don't worry about him, he genuinely wants to do it. you always give him motivation to keep going and it would be an honor for him to become someone who can always protect you.

sebek zigvolt.

♡ yeah, your relationship with sebek wouldn't be that good at first. you two would argue a lot, he would never stop calling you a "lowly human" even though he's a half-human himself. and if you even think of saying anything bad about malleus, that's it, he's this close to killing you on sight. and you did hate sebek for acting like that at first, but as time passed, for some reason you actually started finding it.. entertaining? you loved to make him angry on purpose and then you decided to start teasing and even flustering him. yes, you did flirt with him multiple times just to see what kind of reaction he would give you, so what?

♡ sebek doesn't know how to feel about you. he knows he's supposed to think you're weak and pathetic because, you know, you're a human, but.. why does he feel so weird when you throw your dumb pickup lines at him? and why he feels like he actually wants to be praised by you and he wants you to notice how talented he really is? he knows that you're most likely not being serious most of the time, but he really wants you to be serious for once. uh, he just wants to be praised by you because he deserves it and that's it. it doesn't mean he wants you to be serious when you flirt with him, haha..

♡ sebek really didn't want to fall in love with you and he didn't expect to catch feelings for someone like you, but it still happened. he just doesn't understand why you still hang out with him even though he doesn't treat you that well. and how is he supposed to react when you tease him like that? he knows he should stay serious, but for some reason he just can't control his emotions when he's around you even though he's never that good at controlling them. he also realizes that even though you're a human, you're capable of doing many things and.. ugh, he really doesn't want to say it, but you're actually just as good as some magic users. y-you still have a lot to work on though.

royal sword academy.

chenya.

♡ you and chenya first met during that one unbirthday party after riddle's overblot. you were surprised to find out that a guy from a different school (and a rival school too!) was able to get here so easily and didn't care what nrc students will think of him. and also you thought that the way he could easily appear and disappear as he pleases (or he could just stay as a floating head) was funny. so yes, this guy managed to pique your curiosity.

♡ chenya himself thought you were quite interesting and he was even more surprised when he found out that you came to rsa secretly from other students just to see him. haha, you really betrayed your own school like this for him! wow, y/n, that's something only a lovestruck person would do! but he has to admit, he likes you even more now. just what kind of person are you? you're so full of mysteries and chenya isn't sure if he wants to know all the answers or it would be more interesting to keep it this way.

♡ falling in love with you is fun and exciting. you keep spending more time with chenya no matter what other nrc students think and chenya likes to make jokes about stealing you from nrc students so that you never have to leave him. is he just joking though?.. well, it doesn't matter. what matters more is that you both always end up having so much fun and you feel so comfortable with each other that there's been multiple times when one of you was very close to kissing the other. and lately, it's been very hard for you both to control your feelings.

neige leblanche.

♡ when you first heard of neige, you couldn't believe that someone like that actually existed. i mean, someone more beautiful and popular than vil? is that even possible? and when you finally saw him for the first time.. you were a bit underwhelmed. yes, neige is definitely very pretty, he's adorable, actually, but.. is that really it? but when you actually meet each other, you find it surprising just how nice neige really is. he's very polite, he treats you with kindness and makes sure you're comfortable. oh no, he's so cute, you're about to fall in love-

♡ you actually feel kind of pathetic for getting a crush on neige. it's just.. so predictable, you're really not that special and you're not any better than his fans. you doubt that he will ever notice you, you're just a magicless human from a different world, you don't deserve to be with someone like him. but what you don't know is that neige fell in love with you right when he first saw you. not because of your appearance, even though he thinks you're really pretty, but because of your personality, the way you treat other people and stay kind and patient no matter what. it's very impressive for someone who was basically forced to stay in this world against their will.

♡ falling in love with you feels like neige's life turned into an actual romance movie, but this time he doesn't know anything about the plot, especially the ending. he sure hopes you two will get your happy ending though. neige loves his fans and he really doesn't want to make them sad, he knows that dating someone when he's this popular is not the best decision, but he really, really wants to be with you. this is what true love feels like to him.

noble bell college.

rollo flamme.

♡ you were a bit intimidated by rollo when you first met him, you just.. thought he was a bit scary, haha. but then you noticed just how kind he is to you and that even though he's polite to all nrc students, you're a special case and you certainly are his "favorite". he also was the first person who actually thought you didn't deserve to go through all of this and that it must be very scary and overwhelming for you to have no other choice but to stay in this world full of danger and.. magic. so yes, you got used to his kindness pretty quickly, even though you still had a feeling that something is not quite right.

♡ and yeah, it turned out that rollo really wasn't the best person to trust. he hated magic with all his heart and he wanted it to disappear. and it was hard for him to choose between his growing love for you and his hatred for magic, but then he managed to convince himself that he's doing all of this for your own good and in the end you'll have no other choice but to agree with him. after rollo is defeated, he expects you to hate him as much as others hate him, but to his shock.. you forgive him. you had to deal with six overblots, even though nrc students saved the day this time, it's not like they're much better than him. so yes, you think rollo still can change and you want to give him a second chance.

♡ after that, rollo's love for you becomes even stronger. he can't stop thinking about you and it's hard to tell if he's in love with you or he's obsessed with you. when you have to go back to nrc, it gets even worse and everything around rollo reminds him of you. he really wishes you could spend more time together and he wasn't so focused on his plan. he's gonna be honest, he doesn't really regret doing.. well, all that, but the fact that he could use that time to talk to you more makes him think that maybe.. maybe trying to steal everyone's magic wasn't a good idea. yes, he thinks so only because he could spend more time with you instead of taking everyone's powers. listen, he needs some time, he will change. probably. maybe.

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erotomania [ s.r ]

04 - confession

Summary:

The escalation of your situation was something you’d never expected to happen, and whilst it’s sure to leave you with mental scars, you’re grateful that you get a happy ending.

WARNINGS: hostage situation, mentions of guns, critical self-induced bodily harm, lots of emotions

pairing: spencer reid x gn!bau!reader

genre: ANGST, hurt/comfort, fluff

wc: 5.6k

main masterlist!!

a/n: and with that, erotomania comes to an end. a massive thank you to everyone who joined me through this series and for my irls for letting me rant to you about it all the time 😭 i hope you all enjoyed reading this series as much as i enjoyed writing it! <33

series masterlist!!

01-exhortations, 02-avoidance, 03-revelations, 04-confession

taglist (slashed blogs couldn’t be tagged):

@starzqzi @duhduck @liveitdoll @alovesongtheywrote @bumblebea-xo @wolfstar-17 @yoonglestime @summerknights @spencer-reid-obsessed @rebloggiest-reblogger @blackbeautyiloveyouso @quackie15 @holymusicalmothman @haileycannotcometothephonern @wittle-bunny420 @yeonalie @shadowsmusical @user9170557484 @takethetongue @flowersfromautumn @minhosdoormat @hpstuff244444 @idocarealot @busy-buzzing @ilikefictionalmen @bunbunblOgs @luvmgg

“The stalker isn’t Riley,” His voice sent an almost visible tremor up JJ’s back.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

JJ returned from the phone call with a small clearing of her throat, silently beckoning for you to join her in the next room over, a secret burning in her eyes.

“Is everything alright?” You tilt you head a little at her, Rachel’s hand still placed in your lap giving your leg a small squeeze, her expression feigning concern as she joined you in looking over at JJ.

“Is it Riley?” Rachel’s tone was reasonably believable, although JJ couldn’t help but notice how her expression didn’t quite reach her eyes, and equipped with her new knowledge it made her feel increasingly uneasy.

“Can you join me in the other room please?” JJ’s expression told you that whatever she had just learned over the phone was serious, and so you gave her an immediate nod as you began to push yourself up from the sofa, only to be caught by a hand on your wrist. “Wait, don't go; if this is about Riley, I want to know too."

JJ pursed her lips together, her fingers tightening around the phone in her hand as she consciously made sure to keep her voice calm and collected. “Miss Fontana, i’m afraid that what I have to say is confidential, I can’t tell you what it is.”

Rachel turned her head towards you instead, as if beckoning you to take her side over JJ’s. “I’m sorry Rachel, just give me a second alright? If it’s anything important about Riley i’ll let you know,”

Rachel, seemingly driven by an unexplainable force, grabbed your wrist tighter, your eyes locking in a moment of shared uncertainty. “No, don’t leave.”

"I understand your concern, Miss Fontana, but it's absolutely necessary for this to be a private conversation," JJ explained, her voice carrying a sense of urgency. "Trust me, it's for everyone's safety."

Rachel's grip on your wrist tightened further, her eyes searching yours for reassurance. "I don't want you to leave," she pleaded, her voice tinged with desperation.

You gently begin to peel Rachel's hand off your wrist. "I need to hear what JJ has to say," you whisper, trying to convey both your care and your concern.

“No.” Rachel’s voice is stern, leaving no room for argument. As her grip on your wrist tightened, panic started to rise within you. The intensity of her desperation was overwhelming, and you couldn't understand why she was so insistent on staying.

Conflicting emotions swirled inside you - care for Rachel and concern for her safety surrounding her brother, but also a deep curiosity about the conversation JJ had just had.

The room felt suffocating, the air heavy with tension. You glanced at JJ, who stood there with a somber expression, her eyes conveying a mix of concern and determination. Her expression told you that whatever the conversation she just had was had to do with Rachel directly, and with the amount of insistence Rachel had about not leaving your side you had a feeling Rachel already knew what it was.

"I'm sorry, Rachel," you finally mustered the courage to speak, your voice trembling slightly. "But I need to know what JJ has to say. If it's about Riley, it could be crucial information for all of us." Rachel's grip on your wrist tightened even further, her eyes searching yours desperately. "Please," she whispered, her voice filled with fear and vulnerability.

Your heart ached at Rachel's words, the depth of her emotions evident in her voice. But you also couldn't ignore the nagging feeling that something was terribly wrong. JJ wouldn't have insisted on a private conversation if it wasn't of utmost importance.

Gently, yet firmly, you tried to pry Rachel's fingers off your wrist, hoping to find a compromise. "Rachel, please understand. Whatever JJ has to say, it's for our safety. I promise I'll fill you in as soon as possible."

Pain shot through your wrist as Rachel again tightened her grip, and you winced. "Rachel, you're hurting me," you pleaded, your eyes imploring her to release her grip. Despite her desperation, her actions were pushing you away rather than pulling you closer.

JJ, sensing the escalating tension, stepped forward. "Rachel, please, it will only take a minute."

The room seemed to freeze in the moment, the weight of the unspoken truth hanging heavy in the air. Rachel's eyes flickered between you and JJ, her fear of losing you from your impending conversation imminent. “She’s going to take you away from me.”

“Rachel-” The realisation seems to click in your mind from her sentence, and for a second you stop struggling against Rachel’s grip, looking at JJ as if to ask for silent confirmation, to which she replies with an extremely subtle change in her eyebrows that tells you everything you needed to know. “Please let go.”

Rachel's eyes widened, a mix of shock and desperation colouring her features. "No, you can't trust her. She's trying to tear us apart," she declared, her voice cracking with emotion.

The room became a battleground of conflicting emotions, and JJ's gaze remained steady, unwavering. "Rachel, I understand this is difficult, but you need to let them go. We need to talk."

Tears welled up in Rachel's eyes as she clung tighter to your wrist, a mixture of fear and possessiveness. "You're mine, don't let her take you away," she pleaded, her voice now a desperate whisper.

The atmosphere grew even more charged, and JJ, realising the severity of the situation, took a step closer. "I won't take them away from you, Rachel. But we need to address what I just found out."

The room's tension reached a breaking point as Rachel, overwhelmed by her emotions, fumbled her free hand around in the pocket of her florist’s apron to find something to stop JJ from approaching any further.

The air thickened, and suddenly, pruners meant for gardening found themselves repurposed as an unexpected weapon, amplifying the ominous atmosphere as she held them threateningly not towards JJ, but towards you.

Rachel’s eyes, filled with a mix of fear and defiance, bore into JJ's as she held the metallic tip of the pruners against the side of your neck, tugging on your arm until you were rendered defenceless by your position. "You're not taking them away. I won't let you,"

She raised her voice, a sense of determination in her tone as she didn’t dare break eye contact with JJ.

“I’m not going to take them away from you Rachel, I just need you to calm down for me alright?” JJ stopped in her tracks, putting her hands up to show that she wasn’t a threat to Rachel in any way shape or form.

“You don’t understand! We’re in love!” Rachel’s hand tremors as she holds the pruners against your neck, the metal cold against your skin and the pressure almost unbearable.

“Rachel-” Your voice is quiet and passive as you try to gain her attention.

“You weren’t there, you don’t know anything!” Rachel continues to raise her voice until she’s practically shouting, working herself up with her own emotions. “You didn’t see how they looked at me when we talked for the first time…”

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

There’s a soft ring of a bell as you push open the wooden door of the shop, clearly hung up by hand by someone with less than professional engineering skills if you consider its lopsidedness.

The rest of the shop has that same DIY feel, with mismatched shelves and coloured panes of glass in the windows that shrouded the shop’s interior with bright colours. You’d planned on checking out the Fontana Flower Shop as soon as you’d moved in, but given how long it took you to actually unpack, your visit had been delayed almost two whole months.

“Hello sweetheart, how can we help you today?” Your attention is pulled away from the kaleidoscope of colours by a sweet voice, and you turn slightly, matching it to the smiling face of a woman looking to be in her mid-fifties, a woman you assume is the owner of the shop, half-busy preparing an ornate bouquet.

“Hi, I just recently moved into the area so I just wanted to have a look around,” You give the woman a soft smile, stuffing your hands in your pockets to alleviate the mild social awkwardness flooding your subconscious.

“Ah of course, feel free to have a look around dear, if you need any help my daughter Rachel is just around the corner,” The lady gives you a soft smile as she gestures towards a back area of the shop.

“Thank you very much,” You return her smile with one of your own as you browse the shop.

The delicate scent of various flowers envelopes you as you wander through the charming chaos of the shop. Everything about it had that homemade feel that immediately made you feel secure.

You notice a arrangement of daisies and sunflowers on one shelf, next to an assortment of potted succulents in whimsical containers. The vibrant hues and unique pairings make the shop feel like a hidden gem.

As you explore, a young woman with a warm smile emerges from the back, although you can’t help but notice how it doesn’t quite reach her eyes.

You internally punch yourself for subconsciously behaviourally analysing somebody you’ve never met, but you don’t really have time to dwell on it before she speaks.

"Hi there, I'm Rachel. Anything specific you're looking for, or just enjoying the floral wonders?" She asks, her enthusiasm infectious if not slightly forced.

"I'm just taking it all in for now. This place is fantastic.” You give Rachel a polite smile as you scan the back area of the shop, considering taking home an arrangement for yourself. “Do you have any recommendations for a flower that symbolises new beginnings?"

Rachel's eyes light up. "Absolutely! How about our white roses? They signify purity and new starts. Plus, they're simply stunning. I can put together a lovely arrangement for you if you'd like."

Intrigued, you agree, and Rachel skilfully weaves together a bouquet, adding delicate baby's breath and a touch of greenery.

As she hands you the bouquet and leads you to the main counter to pay, you find yourself again studying her expression. Her happiness seems real, but there’s something underneath that’s stopping it from truly genuine.

“All done! Thanks for choosing us for your flowers,” Rachel hands you the paper receipt, and you exchange it for one of the perfectly pruned white roses from your bouquet.

“What’s this for?” She hesitates to take the rose from you, but with a small prompting with your hand she does.

“I uh- work with the FBI, I didn’t mean to profile you but your eyes are telling me something has been bothering you,” You let out a small laugh of exasperation, feeling mildly stupid. “I mean you’re around flowers all day everyday so it’s probably stupid but you know, small acts of kindness and all that,”

You shrug your shoulders with a half awkward smile as you begin walking towards the exit of the shop, flowers in hand. “I hope you feel better soon.”

“Thank you…” Rachel’s expression grows increasingly thankful, and that small shadow of negativity seems to leave her eyes for a second, replaced by a small glimmer of something new.

Grateful for the welcoming atmosphere, you leave the shop with a newfound appreciation for the art of floristry and a symbol of new beginnings cradled in your arms, unaware of Rachel’s lingering gaze as she twirls the rose between her hands.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

“Come on!” Morgan hit his hands against the steering wheel, pressing the heel of his hand into the horn as if the noise was going to magically make all of the early evening traffic disappear.

Morgan had rushed out of the office as soon as Hotch had gotten off the phone with JJ saying Rachel was inside your house, leaving the rest of the team to catch up. He’d been too late to stop Spencer being injured. He was not about to be too late to save you from the same fate.

Morgan gritted his teeth, frustration mounting with every passing second. The traffic seemed to conspire against him, a gridlock of metal and concrete testing his patience. He glanced at the clock, each ticking second amplifying the urgency of the situation.

His mind raced through different routes, contemplating shortcuts and detours that might shave off precious minutes. Gripping the steering wheel tighter, Morgan made a split-second decision, swerving into a side street, determined to outsmart the congested main road.

The narrow lanes proved no less forgiving, but Morgan navigated them quickly nonetheless. He cursed under his breath, simultaneously praying that the team was already on the scene, managing the crisis until his arrival.

As the city lights blurred by, Morgan's focus remained unwavering. The tension in his shoulders eased slightly when he spotted the familiar silhouette of your house in the distance. His foot pressed harder on the gas pedal, determination overriding any lingering exhaustion.

He came to a screeching halt outside of your driveway, un-holstering his gun before he even got out of the SUV, not bothering to lock it behind him as he ran towards your front door.

He pushed it open with his left hand, his heart pounding with a mix of anxiety and adrenaline. He entered the house with his gun raised to his eyes as he traversed your hallway down towards the sound of JJ’s voice, desperately trying to diffuse the situation.

“Rachel, please put the pruners down, no one is trying to take them from you,” Morgan edged his head around the corner, watching as JJ attempted to approach Rachel with both hands raised in front of her. “Let’s all just calm down okay?”

Rachel's eyes were wild, and the pruners in her hands gleamed ominously under the overhead lighting as they pressed into the skin of your neck. Morgan's instincts kicked into high gear as he assessed the situation. He moved cautiously, maintaining a firm grip on his gun while attempting to keep the tone of his voice steady.

"Rachel," Morgan spoke with authority, his eyes locking onto hers. "Put the pruners down, and we can talk about what's going on. No one wants to hurt you."

JJ shot Morgan a quick glance, grateful for his arrival but also conveying the urgency of the situation. Rachel, caught between distress and anger, seemed momentarily frozen, the tension in the room palpable. “Don’t come any closer!”

Morgan's mind raced through strategies to de-escalate the situation. He took a step closer, trying to establish a connection. "Rachel, I know things might feel overwhelming right now, but we can figure this out together. Just let go of the pruners."

“Rachel, please…” You try to build off of Morgan’s approach. “Please don’t do this,”

The air in the room hung heavy with uncertainty as Morgan continued to inch closer, his eyes never leaving Rachel's. Beads of sweat formed on his forehead, but his expression remained steadfast, projecting a blend of authority and empathy.

"I'm not here to hurt you, Rachel," Morgan's voice softened, a deliberate attempt to soothe the tension. "We want to help. Let's put those pruners down, and we can talk."

JJ, still cautiously positioned nearby, kept a watchful eye on both Morgan and Rachel. The seconds ticked by, each one intensifying the urgency of the situation. Rachel's breathing seemed erratic, caught in a struggle between the grip of fear and the turmoil within her. “You’re going to take them away-“

Morgan noticed a flicker of doubt in Rachel's eyes. It was a small crack in the facade of her distress. Capitalising on that vulnerability, he continued, shaking his head to invalidate what she was saying. "Put the pruners down."

Slowly, almost imperceptibly, Rachel's grip on the pruners began to loosen. The metallic blades lowered, creating a moment of collective relief. Morgan seized this opportunity, his approach deliberate but cautious.

"That's it," Morgan encouraged, maintaining a reassuring tone as he lowered his gun in tandem with her, holding out his left hand cautiously towards you. "Let’s just take a step back and calm down."

As Morgan closed the remaining distance, he took your hand, pulling you away from Rachel to stand behind him, where JJ soon joined you to check that you were okay.

“You’re not in love with me are you?” Rachel spoke to you as if Morgan and JJ didn’t exist, her eyes glistening with fresh tears.

You met Rachel's gaze, your voice calm but firm, although slightly betrayed by the shaking of your hand as your body came down from the adrenaline rush. "Rachel, this isn't about that. I care about you, and I want to make sure you're okay. Let's talk, and we can figure things out together."

“You’re not going to want to be with me after this-“ The tears began to flow down Rachel’s cheeks, gleaming softly under the overhead light.

“Rachel-“

“I should have known this was going to happen-“ Rachel takes a sharp breath in, a metallic rattling noise emerging from the pruners she was still loosely holding as her hands begin to tremor. “Why would you ever love me?”

“Rachel…”

“I was never worthy of you-“ She points the pruners at where you stand behind Morgan, and he shifts further in front of you to protect you in the case that she decides to throw them in your direction.

She doesn’t throw them at you.

It takes to long for Morgan to realise what’s going to happen before it’s already over, Rachel stumbling backwards over your coffee table with the pair of garden pruners lodged in her throat, leaving dark red stains on your carpet as her blood desperately tries to escape her body through the new hole that the pruners had created.

The only thing you can do at the sight is clasp your hand over your mouth, falling into an irregular heart rhythm as your body sends itself into fight or flight mode from the shock.

“Call an ambulance-“ Morgan rushes over to where Rachel is lying half over the coffee table, turning her over into the recovery position as JJ frantically phones for an ambulance.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

The hospital hallway stretched before you as you walked towards Spencer's room, urged by JJ’s voice nagging in the back of your head over the last two days to give him some closure now the entire situation was over.

The sterile scent lingered in the air, a constant reminder of the events that unfolded with Rachel. As you approached, you noticed Riley sitting in the hallway, his eyes focused on the floor.

"Riley-" you acknowledged, a mix of apprehension and remorse in your voice.

Riley looked up, surprise evident on his face as he spoke your name.

“I am so sorry for what I put you through by assuming that you-“

“It’s alright,” Riley shakes his head softly and gives you as much of a smile as he can muster, cutting off the beginning of the inevitable ramble that you were going to go on.

"No, I accused you of stalking me, but it wasn’t you." you admitted, regret colouring your words. "I'm sorry for not realising sooner and for wrongly accusing you."

You continue through with your apology, intent on getting it out not only to make sure he knew that you were regretful, but also so you had one less thing plaguing your mind.

His expression softened, a mix of understanding and relief crossing his features. "I'm sorry I couldn't catch the signs and stop her before it escalated."

Riley paused for a second, his eyes glancing back down to the floor again. “We thought the therapy was working, I guess we were a little too optimistic…”

You both carried the weight of the situation, a shared acknowledgment of the complexities surrounding Rachel's actions. In that moment, the air between you seemed heavy with unspoken apologies and mutual understanding. “Is- Is she okay?”

"She’s going to be alright," Riley said, his voice genuine. "She had to have an emergency tracheotomy, but she’ll recover,"

“Why are you here?” Riley’s voice wasn’t at all accusatory, it was just confused. Why would you want to come to the hospital where Rachel is being treated after everything you’ve been through.

“Oh I uh- my- my friend, the one you helped me pick the flowers for-“ You awkwardly gesture with your hands as you try to explain why your here whilst at the same time figuring out how to refer to Spencer at all.

Was he your friend? Was he something else? After the way you left him a few days ago you weren’t entirely sure anymore.

“Did- Rachel, do that too?” Riley’s voice is slightly hesitant, and you can tell that he already knows the answer to his question, but you placate him with a small nod anyway, biting the inside of your cheek.

“Are you alright?”

Riley’s question catches you mildly off guard, and you can’t help but let out a small laugh of exasperation. “I’ll be fine-“

You give him a slightly pursed smile and a half-nod, trying to reassure him.

“I’m not talking about ‘will be’, i’m talking about right now, are you alright?”

Riley’s elaboration on his question stumps you, and you find yourself unable to give a response beyond an inaudible stutter.

Sensing the need for solace, Riley opened his arms towards you, and you found comfort in a heartfelt hug. It was a silent exchange of understanding, a bridge built over the tumultuous waters of recent events.

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Your hand shakes as you pull open the door to Spencer’s hospital room, not entirely sure how this conversation was going to go.

"Hey Spencer…" Your voice is timid to the point where you’re not entirely sure he heard it, but the light that shines in his eyes as you step into the room is all you need to know that he’s fully aware of your presence.

Spencer speaks your name with all the softness he normally does, and it makes your heart ache.

You can’t help but think back to that moment two days ago when he opened up his heart to you and told you how he really felt about you. The moment where you turned him down and left him alone.

"How are you doing?"

Spencer asks in his normal voice, trying to sound casual. However, he can't hide the subtle note of hope in his voice.

There's a nervous tension in the air. You can tell that both of you are waiting for the other to say something.

“Morgan told me what happened, I’m glad you’re safe now,”

You don’t give him any answer short of a nod, your throat drying up as your subconscious stops you from speaking.

Spencer's trying so hard to play it cool, but you can feel the amount of emotion behind his eyes right now. The longer you stay silent, the more you can tell that Spencer's starting to get antsy.

“…are you avoiding me?”

Spencer speaks slowly, almost as if he's scared that you’ll leave him again if he were to speak out of turn.

”I've been giving you space to think about what I said. I know you do that. I know you need time to process things. So, here we are, almost three days later... and... nothing?"

You sigh softly, keeping your eyes focused on anywhere except for him.

"Please, just..." Spencer's voice trails off when he sees your face.

You can tell that Spencer isn't angry... he's anxious and afraid. His voice is full of worry.

"Say something. Anything."

Your eyes meet his for a moment, and it almost seems as though everything else in the world doesn't exist in this moment.

"Please..." Spencer's voice is quiet, desperate.

The moment your eyes make contact a tear rolls down your face, hot against the skin of your cheek.

"I missed you…"

The tears on your face seem to make him break. All the emotion he’s held back for the past few days comes pouring out of him.

“I missed you too,” Spencer says with a sniffle, “I’ve missed you so much..."

He gives you a small smile. His eyes look directly into yours, as if he’s trying to read your feelings.

"I’m so sorry-" It doesn’t take long for the dam of your emotions to break, and you begin relentlessly crying, covering the lower half of your face with your hand to muffle any sounds that might escape your mouth.

“No. No, don’t be sorry,” He gently takes your hand, holding it in both of his as he guides you to sit down on the edge of his hospital bed.

Spencer’s voice is gentle and calming, as if speaking to a child. “It’s okay to cry. There’s nothing to be sorry about... I’m right here.”

The look in Spencer’s eyes tells you everything he’s been wanting to say to you.

"I’ve hurt you so much…" The words blend together as their caught up in your stream of emotions, and you wipe the sleeve cuff of your free hand over your cheeks to attempt rid them of the streaks of tears. "…and I am so sorry-"

“Please don’t ever say that to me again.” His voice is soft and gentle that it makes you want to curl up into his arms and stay there for the rest of your life. “I promise you that you didn’t hurt me. Even when you left… I was never angry with you. I just- missed you….”

Spencer slowly takes your other hand in his, squeezing them both softly with his eyes never leaving you even for a moment.

"You’ve gone through so much because of me Spencer it’s not fair-”

“Hey, hey, stop that.” Spencer’s voice turns stern for a moment as he gently leans forward to look you in the eyes.

“I made a choice. Okay? Do you understand? I made a choice to be by your side. Nobody else made me do that, okay? Nobody.” Spencer takes a breath. The tone in his voice turns soft once more, though the sternness remains.

“So... don’t ever feel like you hurt me. Because I never felt that way. Ever."

"I just-" You let out a shaky breath through your lips, your eyes locked on where your hands are linked together "I’m sorry…"

"Hey, look at me." Spencer looks at you intently, willing you to look at him. “I would make the same choices all over again. Every. Single. Time.”

“Spence-“

"I need to tell you something."

There's a slight tinge of desperation in his voice as the words pour out of him, interrupting you once again.

"I love you. I love you so much that every moment we're apart, I swear I could die right then and there. Even hearing your name makes me... it makes me feel like I can do anything. Like I could conquer this world if I just had you by my side." Spencer's voice is almost pleading, like he can't bear the thought of you not being by his side.

"I... I just want to be with you, okay? That's all I want in the entire world. Please... I just..." Spencer pauses, taking in a deep breath to make up from the lack of air during his ramble.

Spencer's voice is more quiet when he speaks again, the intensity in his words coming in waves. "Please, just tell me how you really feel."

The desperation is still in his eyes. They seem to be searching every inch of you, almost as if he's afraid he's missing something. "I... I don't care what you say. I just need to know."

“I-“ Your body continues to tense, the words getting caught in your throat before they all seemingly spill out at once.

"I’m in love with you- i’m so in love with you that it hurts and i was so- scared that you were going to get hurt again and I didn’t want to have to live a life without you in it even if it meant just being able to see that you were okay and never be able to speak to you again-"

Spencer’s eyes fill with tears. The words that you just spoke hit him hard, and it’s almost as if he can’t believe that you finally said them out loud.

He pulls you into a tight hug, burying his face in your shoulder and ignoring the painful ache that shot its way up his side. “I love you so much.”

His shoulders tremble as his body shakes, and the tears that were in his eyes start leaking out.

He’s crying. Spencer Reid, the most intelligent and analytical man you’ve ever met, is sobbing like a child in your arms.

"I’m so sorry it took me so long…" Your voice cracks slightly as you tangle one of your hands in the mop of his hair, using the other to hold him against you in a firm embrace, although still consciously careful of his recovering injuries. "I just wanted you to be safe…"

Spencer sniffles as he pulls himself partly out of your embrace, placing his right hand on your cheek and rubbing his thumb under your left eye, wiping it of any tears. “I know…”

Almost as soon as the words leave his mouth, Spencer's lips are pressed against yours.

His body is trembling, and he seems to be holding on to you like you’ll disappear if he lets go. He's never felt anything like this, and he's so scared he might lose this moment.

The kiss is gentle and almost hesitant as the two of you adjust to it, slightly dampened by a mix of both of your tears.

But it was everything in that moment, and you gently bring up one of your hands to mirror Spencer’s as you place it on his cheek.

Spencer’s eyes are closed, but all of his senses seem to be heightened in this moment.

He can feel the texture of your fingers on his cheek and the tears that are running down your face. He can hear your breathing and taste the coffee on your lips.

Time seems to stand still as you kiss, and Spencer tries to soak up every second of this moment.

Finally, after what feels like an eternity, Spencer pulls away from the kiss with a gentle sigh.

He’s breathless, looking at you with pure love in his eyes. “I love you so much,” Spencer’s eyes are full of love, joy, and gratitude.

“I’ve been so stupid,” he says with a laugh, “I’ve loved you for so long... and I just never knew how to tell you. I should have told you years ago. I can’t believe I almost lost you forever without ever telling you…”

Spencer pulls you into a tight hug, his lips pressed against your neck. “I just... I love you. That’s it. I just love you.”

"I love you too Spencer Reid… more than you could ever try to comprehend.”

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #erotomania #mgg #criminal minds angst #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fluff

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asklilmissrarity · 5 months

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The Future of Lil Miss Rarity

Hello everyone, this is Jay Tonique (formerly known as Lil Miss Jay), the writer, artist, everything other than the music in the Lil Miss Rarity animation for the blog "Lil Miss Rarity."

As some of you know, Lil Miss Rarity was an ongoing outlet for my physical, verbal and emotional abuse I was suffering prior to and leading up to Lil Miss Rarity's release, October 11th 2011.

The blog took off so heavily that my entire artistic career became a viable future for me, allowing me to profit from my art, build a huge loving fanbase, and even allowing me to become something of a celebrity in the Brony community (even very much hated by a large portion of the community).

It's needless for me to say that Lil Miss Rarity not only changed but saved my life. I was on the verge of taking my own life around the time the blog was started, due to the abuse I was going through, and if it weren't for the success of the blog that fateful October week, I would certainly not be here, typing this right now. I owe my life to you all, and the support you've given me for this blog.

However, it's time for the news I know very few people want to hear. In fact, I'm sure just reading this line right here has people's hearts sinking, but please, don't be anxious, please read the full post.

I would like to say: Please read the full post, I am going to be very clear about the future.

Moving forward, Lil Miss Rarity will no longer be updated, and the blog is officially entirely over, as of this post.

I am still looking for a musician to commission a new song for the remake of the Lil Miss Rarity animation on YouTube, which will be my final major update involving the blog, and then I will be putting the blog entirely to rest. The animation will serve as a fond emotional farewell to Lil Miss Rarity.

However, that's not the end of the twisted grimdark storytelling. I have decided to make a spiritual successor, a new IP, entirely my own and not using My Little Pony as a crutch.

I won't get too into it, but I left the Brony fandom long ago. It was both the greatest thing to ever happen in my life, and the absolute worst thing to ever happen in my life. I met great friends, but also met unbelievably horrible sick people, many of which I literally got FBI involvement to deal with and many of which are literally in prison now.

Due to this, and many many more reasons I'm leaving out, I cannot and will not continue to be a part of the fandom. This is just a few reasons, as well, that continuing to have Lil Miss Rarity exist as a My Little Pony blog just doesn't make any sense to me.

So what am I doing moving forward?

A brand new IP called "Melodi." It's about a magic school student who is part of a wealthy family who goes on a magical twisted adventure in a horrifying grimdark world.

It will have characters either very slightly or very heavily inspired by the characters of Lil Miss Rarity, with Melodi of course being inspired by Rarity.

It will also be an ongoing web comic, similar to LMR, and will encourage fan feedback just as much as LMR did, but will not be an Ask Blog like LMR.

I plan to release character concepts for the cast of Melodi soon.

Now, there's probably a lot of questions moving forward, so I'll try to answer them now, as well as in asks on this blog, though I'd prefer you send the asks about Melodi to my main blog at http://www.jayisbutts.com/ask

Here's some questions I think will be asked, and I'll answer them here:

"Will this blog be on Tumblr?" - Yes, and on Patreon. Each update will be on Patreon first. When an update comes out on Patreon, the previous update will go public at the same time on Tumblr.

"Don't you think the LMR fanbase you've garnered for 12 years are gonna be upset about this?" - I'm 100% certain they will be, yes. However, I hope that most people who hear this news are excited to see Melodi in the future. I'm very proud of what I've created with LMR, and happy about how many lives I've changed and how many people have told me how much they love LMR. People with the heart-brand tattoo, people with LMR tattoos, people who cosplay as LMR, LMR fanart still being made regularly to this date, real-life Opal dolls, fan-dubs of the comic, fan animations, Anime Music Videos, etc etc etc. I love each and every one of you and I hope that I can one day garner the same amount of love for Melodi as I received for LMR. Thank you all so much for your support.

"What if someone else wants to carry on the LMR blog or use the characters to make their own?" - Please, do. LMR is officially Public Domain as of this post, and I strongly encourage LMR fan-fiction, fan-blogs, etc. I would love if someone could do LMR better than I did. I will very happily use this blog going forward to showcase new LMR blogs and fan-content that I like, and I will very gladly be a guest artist from time to time on an update or two to those blogs. You all have my blessing to take LMR and do with her whatever you want.

"Are you still remaking the LMR animation?" - Yes, I'm still actively seeking a musician to make an official LMR theme that will play in the background of it. It will be a glorious farewell to LMR.

"Is the heart-brand still a thing in Melodi?" - Absolutely, yes. The one incredibly major staple being carried over to Melodi is the heart brand. That symbol has become synonymous with LMR.

"What about the eye scars?" - Probably not. There will be facial scarring of some kind, yes, but considering the new story will not involve killing a cat (not yet anyway), she probably won't have the eye scars.

"Black eye with white pupil?" - We'll see! (It is a sign of Malice's corruption to have a black left eye, so almost certainly yes, but we'll see!)

"Ponies? Humans? Furries?" - I haven't fully decided. In my head, Melodi is a human, but I could also see her being a cat. I'm not sure what I wanna do just yet. However, she will not be a pony. She's gonna be far more human shaped. With boobies.

"Is this one gonna have porn?" - Nope! Not directly as part of the blog, no. Sexual encounters are going to happen in a very fade-to-black way, or a cropped-off-screen sort of way, yes. And there will be sexy characters, like monster girls or demon girls, and I'm sure people will find Melodi herself sexy, too. However, the blog is not going to contain actual porn. No full nudity. It will have what some would refer to as "fetish content," as with LMR, but it's not porn.

"Final question, so... LMR is just... dead? As of now?" - In terms of receiving updates from me, all that will be made is the LMR animation. But no, I certainly hope LMR is not dead. I would love to see the blog live on through other artists I've inspired. You all have my blessing to keep her alive forever.

Thank you all so much for your support.

More news involving Melodi and her twisted adventures coming soon.

I love you all, and I want you all to know how much your support of Lil Miss Rarity has changed my life.

I know it's cringe to type this, but, "I'm literally crying right now."

Mommy will always be pretty.

~Jay Tonique (Formerly Lil Miss Jay)

#lil miss rarity

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yuurei20 · 3 days

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I don't think you talk about newest content so it's fine to ignore this if you want but, yesterday I saw a theory that said something about the counting for chapters was changed on JP? And it's proof that 7 ended two updates ago, and now the game is going back to 1? Something about Ace's title? eopfkefkefj yeah this is vague I don't really get it but just if you've heard anything.

Hello hello!! Thank you for this question!

This blog typically pretends that main story content not released on EN does not exist because spoilers are the worst :<

I will do my very best to be vague but just to be safe, minor spoilers (vaguely plot related) under the cut!

I have also come across theories that maybe the story is going backwards now!

I think that is where "Book 7 ended two chapters ago" comes from: two chapters ago on JP the content of the Main Story changed from Diasomnia characters to Ignihyde characters!

While technically we are still in Book 7 of the main story, the content seems to be going in reverse order (further proven by the announcement of Rook's new card 👀), and the theory goes that now that we have "finished" with Book 7 (Diasomnia) and will be going to Book 6, Book 5, etc.!

The "counting for chapters was changed" part is maybe about what happened on JP back when Book 7 began:

Originally the different books were not separated into "chapters" on JP!

They were separated into beginnings, middles and ends, which worked okay when books were shorter.

But then in Book 5 and Book 6 we started getting sections called "Middle Part 1," "Ending Part 1," etc., which was confusing, but it meant that we could still more or less tell how far along we were in the story and when we could expect it to end.

With Book 7, everything changed!

Suddenly we no longer have a "beginning," "middle" and "end"--we have are numbered chapters. The game has broken from its own, linear, "Book 6 -> Book 7 -> Book 8" timeline, and now anything is possible!

And that is not all! We also ran out of dorm uniform cards. Dorm cards were not released until we reached the Book about the dorm in question, and then right after Diasomnia received their dorm cards, they also received Book 7-exclusive cards that seem to be related to the new titles released on both EN and JP:

Ortho's new title for Book 7 and his Cereberus Gear is, for example, Guardian of the Underworld.

The theory says new cards do not have personal stories behind them because the information that would normally be included in these cards has been woven into the main story (which has also been proven true of both Lilia and Sebek). Another part of the game that Book 7 has changed!

It seems that the new titles will each be associated with their own cards, picked up in backwards-order just like the dorm uniform cards were picked up in forwards-order.

And that brings us to Ace's title:

If this theory is true, Heartslabyul is going to be one of the last, if not the very last dorm that we visit. And Ace's new title has been taken directly from the summon line of his dorm uniform: Trump Card of Hearts 👀

But, like most theories, this one is not air-tight!

If we are truly going backwards to pick up all the new cards, then where are Malleus' "Ruler of the Abyss" and Silver's "Knight of Dreams" cards? Aren't we already in Book 6? And if we're already going into Book 5 with Rook, have we already skipped Idia's card for "King of the Underworld"? Are they skipping overblotters for some reason and saving them for later? (Silver's missing card has an entirely separate theory of its own.)

I do not know! :> But I do very much like the theory that we have technically already completed Book 7 (Book 7) content, maybe even Book 7 (Book 6) content, next will be Book 7 (Book 5) content, etc., as the game progresses! ^^ Exciting!

#twstask

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beenbaanbuun · 7 days

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HI BUNNY! first of all i wanted to tell you to please take it easy and take care of yourself! don't worry about not posting long stuff! remember that this blog is still something you're doing for fun, so please don't everrr feel forced to write something! i hope everything gets better, and that you feel better (physically and emotionally) soon! i'm sending you lots of hugs and positive energy 🫂🫂

and second, omg i saw the new posts related addams!matz and im LITERALLY OBSESSED! yeosang is lowkey (more like highkey) such a cutie i can understand the way darling acts with him cuz i also wouldn't be able to be intimidated by him. and omg the part two of the addams!hongjoong angsty writing 🥹 HES SO SOFT I LOVE HIM!! and hwa being so protective and caring oh im so whipped for all of them tbh. i love how much they love their darling, it's honestly so endearing to see. and i love how yeosang is quickly getting whipped for her too LMAO. i was also wondering if darling ever sleeps (nonsexually, like napping and stuff!) with werewolf!yeosang sometimes, seeing that she very much loves clinging into him. and if she does, how does werewolf!yeosang & matz feel about it!

like i said before, take your time, rest well and feel better soon! you seem like such an amazing person, and your blog and writing brings me so much happiness, so i really hope you can feel all that happiness youre bringing to me (and many others im sure!) right back 🫂🩷

take care mWAAAH <3

— 🩰

hello my lovely!! i’m going to rest up properly and start taking better care of myself!! don’t you worry. i’m sure i’ll be back soon (not that i’m really going, i’m just not writing much lmao) with more stuff to share with you guys.

thank you so much for the love on the addams!matz fic. it means so much to me (both the fic and the compliments) and i love this universe more than anything lmaoo. all the characters are so precious to me (even the ones who haven’t really been introduced yet) and i cant wait to share more with you all!

as for your question, the answer is both yes and no. yeosang has essentially become darling’s living, breathing pillow and naps by the fire with her favourite werewolf have become so commonplace that it’s no longer a surprise to hongjoong and seonghwa when they walk into the living room to see the two of your sprawled out on top of the rug. most of the time yeosang stays awake, his eyes big and wide as he watches you sleep. it’s sweet to see him so taken by you, but if joong or hwa ever ask any questions, he’s spitting out some sort of sarcastic response in a desperate attempt to hide the fact that he’s loving having you nap on him.

“you think i like being used as a pillow for this brat? please, she’s so wriggly when she sleeps; it’s annoying.”

darling will never sleep in yeosang’s room at night, though. there’s multiple reasons but yeosang would argue that the main one is that he won’t allowed her too. like he says, she’s wriggly and he’s willing to accept that when she insists on napping with him downstairs, but in his own bed? no way. besides, hongjoong gets moody when he wakes up without either of his lovers by his side. it’s happened before where he woke up to find that darling wasn’t there. in a panic he woke up seonghwa, only for her to return from the bathroom seconds later. he gave her curt remarks about being abandoned for the rest of the day until seonghwa stepped in to put a stop to his ridiculous attitude.

“oh, you’re going to get a drink are you? i see how it is… always so desperate to abandon me for better offers…”

#ateez x reader #ateez fanfic #ateez oneshot #matz x reader #hongjoong x reader #seonghwa x reader #yeosang x reader #opposites attract universe

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watching-sam-and-dean-again · 7 months

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Watching a reactor on YouTube who just got to Season 4: Lazarus Rising, and I’m so annoyed by the amount of comments with people saying things like, "this is when the series REALLY starts" and "Seasons 1-3 were the prologue, now The Story begins" and "I’ve been waiting for you to meet my favorite character!"

First, I will never be able to understand Castiel being someone's legitimate favorite character. I just don’t get it. He starts off as a massive dick, becomes an ally, uses and betrays both brothers a number of times, rarely takes full responsibility for his actions, and ends up as a totally different and neutered version of himself. But this guy is your favorite!? The only reason I think a large number of fans who love him do is because he comes in the gate treating Sam like crap and he becomes a simp for Dean (or they are shippers). Also, if someone is a more casual fan, I can see enjoying Cass because he’s quirky and he mostly stands up for the Winchesters, but if someone is a big fan of the brothers, Cass makes their lives harder a lot of the time. Also, I’m coming to really hate the fact that the dude is always in a trench coat. How am I supposed to take a character seriously who is essentially like an unchanging cartoon character come to life? Anyway, despite how it might sound from my ranting, I actually do think people are allowed to love whatever character they want, but it just doesn’t compute for me personally that it’s Cass as he is on screen (not in someone’s head).

Next, the idea of people calling the first three seasons "The Prologue" to supernatural is offensive to me personally (well, not offensive but it’s dumb as hell). A prologue is used to give some important background that should be known for you to better understand the main story, but it happened before, or doesn’t quite fit into, the main narrative. I’m sorry, but the first three seasons of Supernatural are the foundation that everything builds off of, and maybe I’m splitting hairs here, but it’s not just the set up to the Real Story. The Real Story of Supernatural has always been and will always be "the epic love story of Sam and Dean," not the angel crap. Calling the basis of the whole show the prologue has an implied message that it’s not as important as, or connected to the rest of the story. Again, people are allowed to have their own opinions about what they enjoy in media, but this idea that what came before Season 4 wasn’t as important as the rest of the show is actually bad media literacy, especially when you consider how much retconning and inconsistency later seasons have (*cough* John Winchester, for exapmle). The early seasons are Supernatural at its most pure, and if you don’t like or care about Sam and Dean's story, what are you doing here?

I was going to go on by listing all of the important things that we learn about Sam and Dean's characters and relationship in the first three seasons, but honesty, I’m tired. If you’re reading my post, I’m sure you already know. True fans of the show, even if seasons 1 to 3 aren’t their favorite, know how important these seasons are. Frankly, if someone claims that they don’t matter as much as the later season, then I’m going to assume that they are probably a heller (and I’m probably right), thus their opinions on the show don’t matter.

Speaking of Hellers, they are the Jehovah’s Witnesses of fandom. They descend on your doorstep (YouTube video, blog post, etc), uninvited and unwelcome, to make you uncomfortable by forcing their literature (head-canons and subtext) on you in a vain attempt to make you convert to their twisted version of a cult religion (Destiel). Some get indoctrinated into their cult, others consider them a joke, and yet others are driven to madness by the constant hounding of the hellers. I wish they would just stay in their lane and let people come to their own conclusions about the show and the characters, but they try to gatekeep the fandom experience by jumping on anyone new and telling them how they are the "most popular ship" and that supernatural queerbaits, but Dean and Cass are still totes husbands, and there is some other guy there, too but Sam is just some jerk who isn’t as important as Wuwu Dean and their Little Meow Meow Cass. If somone actually sees and enjoys Destiel on their own, great, good for them; they’ll find the blogs and groups who love it too. Hellers don’t need to try actively recruiting people. It’s all just a numbers gone to them. We have the most fanfic (um, yes, because the show doesn’t deliver what you want), we are the most popular ship (sure, because the other main ship is brothers which squicks some people out, and because you crucify anyone who admits to being a Wincest shipper), and they tell the stupidest lies (the show shifts away from being about the brothers, and focusses more on Dean and Cass' "relationship," and Sam isn’t as important to the story later). I wish they would just stay in their own sandbox and not come pee in everyone else's. Cult like behavior in action.

Okay, deep breaths. I’m grad I got that one off of my chest, but my blog is getting very ranty. I’m going to try make sure my next post is a positive one.

Happy weekend everyone!

#anti hellers #anti destiel #supernatural #sam and dean #spn meta #Fandom BS #Castiel critical #the epic love story of Sam and Dean #thanks to the gif makers

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twig-tea · 4 months

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Top 5 Couple Fights

Oooooooh this is fun! Thank you for a relatively easy category because so often the fights in these shows are unearned and it is very frustrating. I'm still limiting myself to 2023!

Wen and Alan, Moonlight Chicken

This fight felt real, it felt lived in, and it felt heartbreaking even though we only saw some of it. These two men love each other, but love isn't enough to keep them together, and that realization is as heartbreaking as the fight itself.

My Personal Weatherman

I am obsessed with the fights in My Personal Weatherman because the characters often don't know they're in one, or are in two different fights at the same time. This is all tied to how much I love how well the miscommunication is done in this show. These fights are legible based on what we know about these characters and what they've seen, even when they're completely unnecessary, and I adore that. Of course the best one is the ending fight and not just because Segasaki ties up Yo's wrists in his shirt.

Jack O'Frost

[Not enough gifs of this actual fight and I need to finish this list so this is what you get]. The fight at the very start of this show escalated so quickly, at first I wasn't sure about it even while I appreciated the performances and the intimate way it was shot. But when we get the backstory and we finally understand how much has been withheld and said vs. not said between them, and where their anxieties were rooted and the source of these big feelings, this fight makes so much more sense. This is a show that really benefits from being watched more than once.

La Pluie

[for some reason tumblr is giving me this link to Shan's blog rather than @liyazaki so tagging you, friend!]

Patts was pushed and pushed and pushed, and he lashed out in his insecurity, and when he asked for reassurance (this lineeee) Saengtai refused to give it to him and instead lashed out out of his own insecurity. This was a painful fight that was fully earned; all of the characters and their choices were legible even as they were infuriating. And it led to a critical awakening of Saengtai who was so caught up in his own sad boy narrative he hadn't realized how much he was hurting everyone around him.

My Beautiful Man S2

Kiyoi and Hira's communication issues continuing past S1 is very believable. I said elsewhere that Hira's work on his self-worth is more like a spiral than a straight line and that's very relatable and realistic. Kiyoi being hurt by Hira not valuing Kiyoi's feelings was such an important lesson for Hira to get more than once. Again, so earned, and resulted in the characters self-reflecting and moving a little closer to whatever a healthy relationship means for these two lol

Laws of Attraction

How much do I Love Tinn seeing right through Charn and Charn being big mad at him for Perceiving him so well? All of their fights are so good because they're about boundaries and mutual respect at their core, and they actually listen to one another and are based on how well they know one another (rather than what so often happens, when the characters seem to forget who the person they're in love with actually is). This barely counts as fight but I love it and it's my list so it stays.

Bonus entry that's only for me (shh stop counting the above):

Mr. Cinderella S2

Nobody but me and like 2 other people watched this show, but I'm actually obsessed with the couple fight in Mr. Cinderella s2 so thank you for the chance to rant about it on main some more. I need to start by saying: this plot is ridiculous and the ending sucks. But within this show, Dung and Khoa have an established relationship that has been tested in S1 and is being tested harder in S2, and to a point, they actually stand together and weather the storm, and it was rewarding to watch. And then slowly everything happening ("everything" here being an ABSURD amount of melodrama) starts to wear on Khoa, who sees himself as the one solely responsible for everything, and he unlearns some of what he learned in s1, he stops relying on Dung as his support, stops telling Dung what's going on because he doesn't want to burden him, and stops trusting Dung's word about what is happening. And so, when the jealousy plot hits, it's actually believable that Dung would be mad at Khoa, not for cheating, but for not respecting Dung as a partner in their relationship. It's well done, I wish so much that it were in a better show so that I could actually recommend anyone watching (I don't). I've seen this trope (assumed cheating) done so badly and so unearned in so many shows, this was so refreshing.

Extra bonus: Best couple fight scene of all time?

Gameboys S2

[I give up on gifs of this scene; have them upset for other reasons instead!]

What I love about the way they fight in this show is that, beyond it being earned etc. etc., the dialogue is so raw. They repeat themselves, they just yell over one another, they get rude, they try saying something to de-escalate and it gets worse instead. This is not a carefully crafted speech, or a single perfectly delivered devastating line; this is raw emotion. I recognize this fight, I've been in this fight, this is what I sound like when I fight lol And we see them really fight at least twice, and the way they fight in ep8 has changed as a result of the earlier fight is also SO good.

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zadr-day · 4 months

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Why ZaDr?

Think of every worthwhile rival ship that has ever existed; dip it in a poison coating of cynical worldbuilding, sprinkle it with a topping of shunned existence, and let the devil kiss it with a waxy pair of slimy, scifi alien lips. Only then, will you have yourself a sample of what ZaDr has to offer. These characters are compelling in themselves; one being a bizarre and paranormal obsessed clone of Earth's greatest scientific mind, the other a malfunctioning spaztic robot ant from beyond the stars. Each of them ostracized, for one reason or another, largely by virtue of their own passionate past mistakes.Those mistakes, failed efforts to be seen as worthwhile, to be praised, to be loved. But then you set them against each other, as enemies. As mirrored foils. Neither of them in the right, gray morality reigns supreme as they are purely obsessed with their own selfish reasons for self aggrandizement. Anything “good” that might happen as a result of their actions is always cast in the light of unintended circumstance. The true fight is with reality itself, while the sharp end of that crushing conflict is pointed towards the only one who could possibly understand what they’re going through. In the world of Invader Zim, every mentor, leader, parental figure, teacher, adult, child and Invader, feels more real by virtue of misanthropic absurdity. Their inability to provide the support and guidance for the main characters to function in a healthy way, is so very like the absence of nurturing many people feel in their youth. To anyone who has experienced life at its worst growing up, these caricatures of the real world provide a powerful sense of being seen. There is something radical about a story that isn’t written with any other moral than “ this living in society shit sucks”. That speaks to people, and continues to speak to me. ZaDr has always smacked of tragedy, in that you know things will end badly for everyone involved, but it’s still impossible to look away as everything is set ablaze. Two headstrong protagonists, locked in a battle of opposing wills and addictive delusion. It makes the sweetness sweeter, it makes the pains of grand fantasy ache deeper, knowing that these two characters are ultimately fighting losing battles for pitiful reasons.The denial of personal failure, the stubbornness to find purpose. In all of reality, all they truly have is each other. To see that dynamic and ship them is to say that love is possible even in the most dire of circumstances. Time and time again I find myself returning to ZaDr. I think something about the dynamic speaks to the part of us that knows things are wrong and that the fight against it is worthwhile. And that struggle, while futile, can still hold a tremendous amount of personal importance. It speaks to failing, and having the strength to get back up to try again. No matter the odds. For a pairing hated by its own creator, the fixation that Zim and Dib have on each other is an undeniable magnetism seen by the fandom since the launch of the cartoon, all the way back in 2001. This ship has staying power, and after over two decades has failed to fall into total obscurity. Those touched by its effects have gone on to create resonant, deeply meaningful works. This blog, and the posts that I make on the topic, are my way of giving back to the ZaDr community. By displaying the stories of triumph and tragedy put forward by the IZ community, I hope to welcome new fans and give back to long standing fans by providing a living archive and blog space. I look forward to sharing the wonderful talents of so many artists with you all. Happy first ZaDr day of many

#zadr #invader zim #zim #dib #iz #zadr-day official

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bonesandthebees · 2 months

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I'm not sure if any of this is as important to say as I feel like it is, but just in case, here it is.

Idk about you, but I'm really tired of having things taken from me because the cc's were abusive. I say this with an emphasis on the fact that supporting their victims and condemning their actions is far more important, that I'm not giving that man a single cent anymore. The most important thing the community can do is support the people he hurt. But It's still gonna hurt to purge my playlist because we, as a community, were lied to. And something I derived comfort from, especially in the wake of recent personal events, has been taken from me. Not by the community or by the people coming out; by him and his actions.

So seriously thank you for creating a space for people to talk about what's going on, because it's so easy to feel guilty right now for having feelings about this situation. Especially as a neurodivergent person whose main comfort is music, including music (and YouTube videos) he made.

I just feel like it's important to put this out there. The community as a whole needs to support the victims, but it's also okay to feel betrayed and it's okay to look at his songs in your playlist, dreading deleting them, for a while. No one will hate you for that. You're not a bad person for that. They're just songs or videos, but they're content that mattered to some of us. How dare he ruin that for all of us. How dare he.

Now that I've written a whole entire novel, please take care of yourself. I know I'm an internet stranger but I almost didn't write this because I think that it's important to emphasize that while I'm glad to see Tumblr users creating a space to talk for those of us who don't post and such, I also think it's way more important that your blog be a safe space for you yourself.

- a rambly anon 🪐

yeah, trust me, I'm fucking sick of this too. you're not selfish for feeling upset about deleting his songs from your playlist or not being able to watch vods of his for comfort anymore. you are not a bad person for having an attachment to someone who lied to his audience about who he was. you are human. you are allowed to be upset.

also, to veer slightly from your point but to bring something else up, while I know there are varying opinions on the community in this I personally don't think I want to let this make me stop hoping for people to be good. yes, it might seem like an endless pattern of people you like being revealed to be assholes. and for some people, they might want to leave the community to avoid that disappointment again. for me, I'm not going to put cc's up on a pedestal and expect them to be great people, but I'm not going to expect the worst from them either. keep my expectations realistic, but not pessimistic. content creators are flawed human beings like the rest of us, and sometimes they can be really shitty people, but sometimes they can be good people too. and I'm always going to hope for the latter.

and thank you for thinking of me. honestly the reason I've slowed down answering asks the past few days is precisely because I've been trying to take care of myself. I've gone up and down in terms of how I'm doing, and when I'm not feeling up to it I don't touch my inbox.

and despite everything that's happened this morning, I've had a good day. I got myself a cinnamon roll. I'm drinking green tea and it's sunny out. I saw flowers blooming on the side of the road and it made me smile. focusing on the little things, you know?

#ask #wilbur situation #anon

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thelovinghost · 9 months

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It is sad that I found this account before your main. ANYWAY!

I don't know your rules so funny little thing.

The yandere host club finding out that Y/N wants kids (gn Y/N) like adopting them or having them

Only if you want.

(Yandere if you can but if you don't want to that's fine to!)

Honestly, quite a few of my secondary blogs have more followers and interactions than my main :( I don't know if people know it's me, but I also have like 50+ different blogs Yet again I didn't include Mori, because I don't like him

Reader Gn, but briefly implied FAB

!!CHARACTERS AGED UP!!

Tamaki Suoh

He has so much love to give

He's wanted a kid the whole time, so he just needed you to come around

He's ecstatic! Practically jumping off the walls

If you have a child together, it would make it harder for you to leave

Even if you were once unhappy with your relationship, you'll fall for him eventually and this just hits the nail

If you're looking into Adoption, he probably already has all the paperwork and the agency

Though, if you want to conceive a child, he's trying any chance he can get [Sex drive goes up 500% Trying to get his dog wet 24/7]

He has a fear that you might end up like his mother, but luckily there's medicine for it now, thanks to his and Kyoya's dad

He's the best dad 100/10. He wants to be there for every moment of his child's life

He'll lose his mind if he misses something

Say he misses his child walking, he'll cry for like a week straight. You better have gotten it on video

Speaking of video, he records everything they do. He wants to save every moment

He gets more emotional when his child goes to school

He wants to hold onto them forever

He wants so many kids

You have to be a voice of reason

If you happened to have another child, he's not going to be mad

Your child can always look at Tamaki for Emotional comfort. If they have a crush though, they'll come to you.

Before you have the child, he imagines what they'll be like

Man has so many daydreams about your happy, average, family life :)

Kyoya Ootori

Genuinely could give or take a child

He's not the biggest fan of kids, but it'll be a mini version of you both. Or a mini version of just you

He doesn't want to be like his father, so of course he'll be more present in his child's life

He gets a better control of his emotions

Has their whole life planned out

He even has different plans if something goes wrong. Has every possible situation possible and has connected it all together

Kind of obsessed

Tamaki visits a lot just to see their kid

It annoys Kyoya to no end

Honestly, your child is probably just like Kyoya, much to your annoyance

That's all you need is another Kyoya

Kaoru Hitachiin

Okay... You want a kid?

He's never really thought about it

But, he's open to it... I mean you used to hate him

He'll spend time with you looking into your options

He's the second best dad, only beat by Tamaki

Your child will probably get Kaoru and Hikaru mixed up, much to Kaoru's disappointment

Called Hikaru dad once and Kaoru was mad at about it all day, while Hikaru teased him about it

Speaking of Hikaru, you're kid loves to annoy and bother his uncle. They'll ask Hikaru a million questions and Hikaru tells you to get your kid

^Kaoru is kind of proud

He'll love his child no matter what happens

He loves taking care of his kid. He has a more 'feminine' roll in the relationship, even if you're a stay at home mom

Hikaru Hitachiin

As he grows up, he gets more mature, though he has his moments

He doesn't know how to be a parent [But who does]

He's the most stressed about it, because he doesn't know what to do

You'll have to calm him down

Maybe this is a good thing?

He'll make sure his kid doesn't mix him up with his brother

But, you might have twins if you can give birth

^ If so, he'll have a deeper connection with them, because he's a twin

Your kid pranks you both a lot

Smashes food in your face, trip you, switch your bodywashes, tricking you

You're the main target for the pranks, because Hikaru is less likely to fall for it. Man invented twin pranks

There's nothing they can do that he hasn't done

He hadn't wanted a child, but he's so glad you both did

He might even want more kids

Mitsukuni 'Honey' Haninozuka

Having a kid with him would probably be an accident

Was NOT planned

Kinda funny if your kid is taller than Honey

I... Uh... Don't know what else to write... I'm sorry

Haruhi Fujioka

If you do have a child together, she'll probably carry the child

Though, she is the most open to adoption

She would love to give a child a home

Either way, she'd love being a mom

Granted, she never really thought about children. It was kind of at the back of her mind

She's more mature than you and takes on most of the responsibility

She doesn't mind, she enjoys it and she wants you to be happy

You're more emotionally connected than her. You sympathize with your kid[s] more

If the kid wants something, they'll ask you, because Haruhi will say no

#ohshc #ohshc x reader #tamaki x reader #tamaki suoh #kaoru hitachiin x reader #kaoru x reader #hikaru hitachiin x reader #hikaru x reader #kyoya ootori x reader #kyoya x reader #haruhi fujioka #haruhi fujioka x reader #honey x reader #ohshc honey x reader #mitsukuni haninozuka x reader #mitsukuni x reader #tamaki suoh x reader #kaoru hitachiin #yandere ohshc

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sgiandubh · 5 months

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I have a question! You're a shipper. Therefore, you like both S&C, but you only post about Sam and the posts are about him not doing enough to expand his brand, how he is miscast and untapped potential. You've said you were a defender of Sam, but I did not think you came across that way, you mostly write about what Sam isn't doing to your liking. So, my question is why don't you post about Caitriona? One Belfast post some weeks ago and a paragraph about her non-existent branding. Of course, this is your blog, and you can post and say whatever you'd like, I'm just an anon so I don't have a leg to stand on here, but I'm being genuine in asking.

Dear Caitriona Anon,

Yours is an interesting, provocative question and for this reason alone it did not make the classic trek to the bin (yay?).

Oh, yes, a shipper I am. Probably not what you folks call an 'extreme shipper', but a staunch, firm shipper, whose convictions aren't just based on wishful thinking. Enough said.

May I ask (and I swear I am doing it without malice) for how long have you been following my page? I wrote about C quite a number of times, even specifically about her, in a very positive way, if you'd just care to look into the archives. For example, this post: https://www.tumblr.com/sgiandubh/724773265698062337/la-passante-de-la-place-des-vosges-the-passerby. And I have always, always ferociously defended S, against all odds, especially when the Disgruntled Tumblrettes (probably the most unkind, dishonest, cynical tribe of this fandom) went for him in a rather unsavory fashion.

Now, Anon, do not expect me to constantly fangirl over These Two, because this is not going to happen. They are my age and as such, I see things perhaps a bit differently than OL's main demographic. Cynically speaking, I can afford the luxury of being a bit irreverent, from time to time, about two people I find extremely endearing (make no mistake) and worth of my attention. Not a mommy, nor a worshipper. Just a rational shipper (we are quite a few, in here, you know), who does not think this is all about unicorns and leprechauns for ever frolicking at the end of the rainbow.

Because it's not - this is about two people who make terrible gaffes and horrendous mistakes, too. This is about a girl who sometimes shows such entitlement and wrath, that it is almost too hard to like her, at times. And about a boy whose foot in mouth syndrome is, by now, proverbial. This is about two people whose lies and coverups slowly turned them into cartoonish, PR-generated versions of themselves. And this is about two people who, almost like in a Wilde parable, unexpectedly found fame, fortune and love on their path. Will they squander part of it? All of it? Will they be wise about it and learn from their own blunders? This is something I find fascinating to observe, Anon.

My critiques of S's branding have always been, I think (or at least, I sincerely hope), respectful, motivated and constructive. Mainly because I think that (particularly) in his case, there is a deep chasm between his PR and real personas. He would have everything to gain if he stopped trying so hard to be someone he obviously isn't. And so would she.

If my thoughts are not your jam, Anon, simply stop reading me. What you do seem to conveniently forget, too, is that this blog is also, and maybe above everything else, about these two people falling for each other, for real. And it is my deepest belief that we do not help this story by turning it into a cheap cliché or behaving like a hungry mob prone on tantrums if they do not deliver what is conventionally expected. And perhaps you are right, in a way: I seldom post about them as separate entities. In my mind, they are one.

You are welcome to answer, Anon. And I hope I managed to do the same with your question.