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wangxianficfinder · 8 months

Text

In the mood for...

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1. Hi! For the next ITMF can you recommend me a protective sibling JYL and JWY. I want them to tell LWJ if he just want to fight/berate/scolding WWX, he better stay away from WWX because of LWJ's attitude not only hurt WWX feeling but hurting WWX reputation and social standing.

Bonus if they team up with WQ and WN

Another bonus if they are angry at LXC at forcing a situation where LWJ and WWX forced to be together when LWJ is not ready to accept his own feeling. They are angry because it only benefit LWJ (he learn to deal with his feeling and socialize) and hurting WWX. Thank you! @idontknowwhattowriteforusername

could you find a way to let me down slowly, if you’re leaving baby let me down slowly by ravenditefairylights (M, 36k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Golden Core Reveal, Implied/Referenced Sex, Miscommunication, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Twin Prides of Yúnmèng Dynamics, Hurt WWX, Mutual Pining, Unreliable Narrator, Self-Esteem Issues, Twin Prides of Yúnmèng Feels, Protective Siblings, Trauma, Slightly dubious consent, courtesy of drunk sex, Inventor WWX, Genius WWX, Phoenix Mountain, Chronic Pain, Getting Together, Fix-It of Sorts, One Braincell Trio, PTSD)

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2. Hello! First of all thank you for all your recommendations, my brain would probably rot without them. Do you know any fic where wwx has to marry/court/fake marry lxc but is in love with lwj, with the first jade knowing this and absolutely supporting it?

still left with the river by TooSel (E, 77k, WangXian, ChengQing, Canon Divergence, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Fix-It, Arranged Marriage, Political Alliances, Yílíng Wèi Sect, Slow Burn, Friends to Lovers, Pining, Jealousy, Infidelity, Adoption, Angst with a Happy Ending, Golden Core Reveal, Cultivation Sect Politics) still left with the river is pretty damn close

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3. ITMF: Hello! I recently read “Turn Left” and it gave me lots of Twin Jades of Lan feels. I’d love to read more fics where LWJ + LXC are separated while young and reunite as adults. I’ve read “we could turn the world to gold,” but those are the only fics I know of with a long-lost-brothers premise. It doesn’t need to be the whole focus, but I’d like something emotional that explores LWJ + LXC’s relationship. No incest, please, and if LWJ has romance I’d prefer wangxian endgame. Thanks so much!!

Across the street to another life by danegen (M, 99k, wangxian, modern, unleashed au, Family Fluff, Set in America, Hurt/Comfort, Past Child Abuse, Addiction, Crime, Amnesia, Ableist Language, another fridged mother, POV Alternating, past wwx/ofc, past wwx/omc, Medium parent YZY, A-Yuan is wwx's biological son, Musicians, Happy Ending) nowhere near the focus of the story, as lwj and lxc were separated very young, but i found it interesting anyway

The Dreams of Youth by sami (E, 85k, WangXian, YZY/TLJ, Canon Divergence, Time Travel, Fix-It, Family, Not Lan Sect Friendly, Bad Dads, good dads, JFM's A+ parenting, Qingheng-Jun's F- Existence, Childhood Friends to Lovers, Sort Of, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Explicit Sexual Content, Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Some People Live/Not Everyone Dies, Canonical Character Death) This technically happens in the Lan Zhan only part of the Same Moon Shines series

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4. Hope you guys are well!! IITMF Dark Lan Wangji being super protective of Wei WuXian.

Bonus if it's Dark Gusu Lan being protective of our bunny. Please rec only completed fics or the ones that are regularly being updated.

Thank you ~ @tinyfoxpeach

A Matter of Time by mrcformoso (E, 44k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, POV LWJ, POV JC, Dark LWJ, Manipulation, Grooming, WangXian Get a Happy Ending, Consensual Underage Sex, Except problematic please read warning in first chapter, Blood and Violence, Insane LWJ, Manic LWJ, Conditioning, WWX is a Lán, Minor Character Death, Confused JC, Golden Core Reveal, Good Friend NHS, WWX Isn’t Adopted by the Jiāngs, Abusive Jiāng Family, Jiāng Family Bashing, Jiāng Family Critical, POV NHS, Dark NHS, Anal Sex, Marathon Sex, Dual Cultivation, Qīnghéng-jūn Lives, LWJ Has a Big Dick, WWX Self-Lubricates, Plot Twists, Porn With Plot, Scheming NHS, Manipulative NHS, BAMF LWJ, BAMF WWX) link in #14

💖 Hoards and treasures by apathyinreverie (T, 21k, WangXian, Siblings, Family, not particularly Jiang friendly, YZY Bashing, slightly darker Gusu Lans, LXC being the best brother, Some manipulation, But with the best of intentions, and not between wangxian, Dragon LWJ, Fox WWX, Smitten LWJ, Fluff, perfect happiness, adorable WWX, Romance, Some worldbuilding, courting)

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5. I’m in the Mood for a Fic where WWX can use LWJ sword maybe LWJ can also use his, it doesn’t have to be the main point of the story. It could just maybe be a little moment in a bigger story would be great as well @zerokogane

when you’re doing all the leaving (then it’s never your love lost) by tardigradeschool (T, 26k, wangxian, canon divergence, hurt/comfort, canon-typical violence, sharing clothes, sharing a bed, fix-it, golden core transfer) has a few moments where WWX gets to wield Bichen

come home to my heart by occultings (microcomets) (M, 29k, WangXian, Bodyswap, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Canon Divergence, First Time, Getting Together, Confessions, Sharing a Bed, Misunderstandings, and a little bit of hurt/comfort as a treat)

❤️ Gentians in bloom by teawater (M, 251k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, AU after cold spring, Political Marriage, Dysfunctional Family, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, LQR bashing (not really), POV Multiple, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Eventual Happy Ending, BAMF WWX, JC is actually a lot better than canon, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, YZY bashing (again not completely)) has something like that at one point if i remember correctly 😊

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6. I just want to ask , is there a fiction where wei wuxian dies at xuanwu cave @random-online-reader

Blood of the Black Earth by wirevix (M, 16k, wangxian, JC & WWX, JC & LWJ, canon divergence, major character death, Xuánwǔ of Slaughter Cave, Sunshot Campaign, Sad with a Happy Ending, Ghost WWX, Monster WWX, Canonical Character Death, Although not at the canonical time, Grief/Mourning, Good Sibling JC, WIP)

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7. A friend recommended I put a request. I'm in the mood for something like making out to hide from the bad guys, wangxian, modern or not, doesn't matter, I read Shifting Suspicion by scifigeek14 and loved it

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8. #itmf in the mood for a fic where lan zhan is protective of wei ying in canon verse; but in a more direct way, like someone said something or did something ? and lan zhan is frost chill angered @wutheringskies

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9. I’m in the mood for fic where A) it’s a Wangxian Disney inspired au of sorts anything works or B) Wangxian Detective au @selkie-hi

9A)

all your life you'll dream of this by Attila (T, 22k, WangXian, Fairy tale, Cinderella Fusion, Pining)

Frog, Beast, Fish, Idiot by Attila (T, 3k, WangXian, Fairy Tale, DumbassesStarring in:, The Frog Prince, Beauty and the Beast, The little mermaid)

9B)

Keep Track of Losing Days by giraffeter (T, 74k, WangXian, NieLan, Modern AU, Case Fic, Mystery, Getting Together, Flashbacks, Detective LWJ, antifa WWX, Sharing a Bed, First Kiss, First Meetings, Seattle, Mutual Pining, nonfatal car accident, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Friends to Lovers) wwx is missing and lwj is a detective

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10. Hi! I have two requests for itmf. A) Anyone know of any good crow!WWX fics? I’ve had a craving for this recently. B) Also, I want everyone’s favorite modern wangxian fics pretty please! Thank you!

10A)

you by sami (T, 6k, wangxian, modern w magic, shapeshifter au, accidental baby acquisation)

💖 [insert bird pun here] by nienie (T, 7k, wangxian, canon divergence, Animal Transformation, Reincarnation, Thirteen Years of WWX's Death, Crow WWX, Light Angst w Happy Ending, Fluff, Light-Hearted)

❤️ chasing you by jaws_3 (T, 10k, wangxian, shapeshifting, identity porn, pining)

10B)

💖 Pentimento. by orange_crushed (E, 73k, wangxian, modern, college/university au, art conservation, museums, pining, not actually unrequited love, angst w/ happy ending, misunderstandings, smut, major character injury, hospitalization, hurt/comfort, past incarceration, forgery)

Come Around and Stay by trippednfell (M, 160k, wangxian, modern, slow burn, kid fic, found family, it gets worse before it gets better, PTSD, blood and injury, dissociation, trauma, angst w happy ending, musicals, alternating pov, JC & WWX reconciliation, hurt/comfort, panic attacks)

together, we’re just enough by lulu_kitty (E, 134k, wangxian, past WWX/OFC, modern, younger LWJ, bartender LWJ, older WWX, rich WWX, fluff, yearning, smut, bottom LWJ, LWJ has scoliosis, slow burn)

With No Particular Affection by Chrononautical (E, 92k, WangXian, Modern AU, Arranged Marriage, Kid Fic, Miscommunication, Family Drama, JFM and YZY’s A+ Parenting, Good Uncle JC, Wedding Fluff, Genius WWX, Street Kid WWX, Homelessness, Rich LWJ, Oblivious WWX, Cinnamon Roll WN, Implied/Referenced Suicide, WWX Has a Pregnancy Kink, Domestic Fluff, Fluff and Angst)

The Right to Care by travelingneuritis (E, 61k, WangXian, Modern AU, Mood Whiplash, musician LWJ, nanny wwx, Developing Relationship, Breakup, Texting, Pining, Eventual Happy Ending, Adoption, Child Abuse, abuse intervention, Miscommunication)

Waiting for Spring by thievinghippo (E, 130k, WangXian, Modern AU, MLB AU, Baseball AU, Mutual Pining, Pining while fucking, slight angst, Happy Ending)

Tempo Rubato by Spodumene (E, 107k, WangXian, Modern AU, Angst with a Happy Ending, Romance, Persuasion au, Separations, Mutual Pining, Depression, Miscommunication, Emotional Roller Coaster, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Reconciliation, Eventual Smut, Jane Austen Fusion, Underage Kissing)

He is Wei Wuxian’s by devinokaze (T, 41k, WangXian, Modern AU, Celebrity, actor!wwx, singer!dancer!lwj, Social Media, Entertainment Industry, POV Outsider, Fluff and Humor)

You & Me Baby, We’ll Eclipse The Sun Series by 2501987 (M/E, 130k, WangXian, XiCheng, MIND THE TAGS, Modern AU, Mafia, Murder husbands, Torture, Possessive Behavior, Blood and Violence, Older JC, Younger WWX, Hurt/Comfort, Dark)

INSTAnt Attraction by CaliKayeTylers (T, 41k, wangxian, LXC/NMJ, JGY/NHS, JC/WQ, JYL/JZX, modern, Fluff, Meet-Cute, Getting Together, Age Difference, Mental Health Issues, Instagram Model)

Lan Zhan's University Days (JAFFY) by sami (T, 10k, wangxian, modern (with cultivation), immortality, University, outsider pov, Wei Wuxian is a chaos gremlin, ridiculous future bullshit, wwx vs Local Culture)

the minor fall, the major lift by Fleetling (T, 5k, wangxian, modern, Depression, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Musicians, Canon Divergence, Oblivious WWX, Good Sibling LXC, Supportive LXC)

To See You (Again) by FrameofMind, Jo Lasalle (Jo_Lasalle) (E, 84k, wangxian, modern, London au, LWJ fucks, bottom LWJ, friends to lovers, self-discovery, pining, grindr, light bondage, experienced LWJ, less experienced WWX, straight boy WWX) link in #17

Truth Will Out (when caught on video) - End_OTW_Racism! by KizuKatana (E, 90k, WIP, wangxian, WN & WWX & WQ, graphic depictions of violence, modern cultivation, canon divergence, YZY abuses WWX , caught on camera, partial core removal, WWX kicked out of Jiang sect, livestreamer WWX, meet ugly, dual cultivation, smut, no war)

The Fifth Type of Non-Contact Force by Caixx (Not Rated, 83k, WangXian, Modern AU, High School, Slice of Life, Slow Burn, Fluff and Humor, Actually Somewhat Canon, Mutual Pining, Horny Teenagers, Angst with a Happy Ending, Non-Graphic Smut)

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11. helloooo, hope your day is lovely.

(i guess this would be a itmf) Do you have anything where past and future characters meet. any characters is fine but like hopefully they all meet as a group @twlaei

A Room Full of Dead People by BurningBlueDiamond (T, 10k, wangxian, time travel, fix-it, but not really, canon divergence, Conference in Qinghe but canonically they stay in Gusu, pov outsider)

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12. hello! please, for the next iitmf: song lan/xiao xingchen, preferably modern au, no song lan/xiao xingchen/xue yang, no abo, no mpreg. thank you!

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13. for the next itmf, i was wondering if you have any fics set in novel post-canon before they return to cloud recesses? maybe about their elopement or getting married or just them being happy after finally getting together. thank you for your hard work!

Honeymoon Every Day series by Admiranda, Rynne (E, 103k, WangXian, Established Relationship, Married WangXian, Oral Sex, Snowballing, Hand Jobs, Blindfolds, Dom/sub Undertones, Soft WangXian, Frottage, Clothed Sex, Outdoor Sex, Fluff, Bathtub Sex, Riding, Cockwarming, Hair Washing, Post-Canon, Hair Brushing, Gift Giving, Case Fic, Drunkji, Masturbation, Dirty Talk, Pillow Talk, Post-Coital Cuddling, Come Marking, WWX is a Tease, Domestic Fluff, WWX's debatably self-lubing ass, Night Hunting, Grumpy Ghosts, meteor showers, Intercrural Sex, Non-Penetrative Sex, LWJ Has a Biting Kink, Rough Sex, Minor Masochism, Minor Sadism, WWX is a Brat, Face-Fucking, Anal Sex, Bondage, Forehead Ribbon Bondage, Nightmares, Mild Hurt/Comfort, WangXian Have a Breeding Kink, Mischievous WWX, Inventor WWX)

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14. For an IITMF, can y'all rec me some LWJ time travel fics? Was thinking about Same Moon Shines series again, and now I'm craving some good LWJ going back in time, whether purposefully or by accident, and loving his Wei Ying properly from the start 🥺

Looking at You Always, All Ways by Keysmashed (T, 29k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Nostalgia, Subtly Assertive LWJ, very mild angst, Angst with a Happy Ending)

A Narrow Bridge by FrameofMind, Jo Lasalle (Jo_Lasalle) (E, 700k, wangxian, time travel fix-it, slow burn, getting together, first time, pining, pining while fucking, burial mounds settlement days, angst w happy ending)

Brother-In-Law's by Loveable_Psychopath (M, 324k, JYL/JZX, wangxian, JC/WQ, canon divergence, time travel fix-it, Memories, Butterfly Effect, Sexual assualt, Self Harm, Self Doubt, BAMF JC, Fluff, Angst with a Happy Ending, Rape/Non-con Elements, Rape Recovery, Threats of Rape/Non-Con, Everyone Lives au, PTSD, good parent YZY, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Depression, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Canon-Typical Violence, Warning: JGS, Emotional Manipulation, Manipulation, Second Chances, WIP)

Unlikely Trio by YumichanHamano (T, 112k, wangxian, JYL/JZX, canon divergence, time travel, transmigration, Fluff, Attempt at humour, Some Canon Character Deaths, Cloud Recesses study days)

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15. I'm struggling a bit atm so I've come crawling back for another ITMF request. Are there any fics that have rusong in them? Alive? Preferably complete (I know of at least 2 wips that haven't been updated in over a year)? And failing that, any where wwx and/or lwj adopt mo xuanyu? Thank you again for all your hard work and thank you to all the people that share their recs ❤ @theladypeartree

🧡 Resplendence by FrozenMarVel ( E, 166k, WIP, WangXian, CS Lives, Rouge cultivator WWX, Crossdressing, Canon Divergence, Fix-It of sorts, Fluff, Explicit smut) link in #17

Lan Xichen's Home For Politically Inconvenient Children by Lysces (T, 65k, LXC & LWJ, LWJ & LSZ, LXC & LSZ, JRS & QS, JGY/QS, JC/WQ, wangxian, JGY & LXC & NMJ, Canon Divergence, Post-Bloodbath of Nightless City, Fix-It, Fluff and Angst, Kid Fic, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Intentional Baby Acquisition, LXC pov, Canon Half-Sibling Incest, Minor Character Death, Off-screen torture, Aftermath of Torture, mild medical descriptions, Grief/Mourning, Necromancy, Adoption, good brother LXC)

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16. itmf nmj/lxc centric fics! mentions of relationships with jgy are ok, but pls be endgame nmj/lxc and jgy getting kicked to the curb and/or getting his just desserts. tyvm!

Synced by theherocomplex (T, 23k, LXC/NMJ, scifi au, romance, falling in love, light body horror, character study)

found in translation by sysrae (E, 12k, LXC/NMJ, wangxian, modern cultivation, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, not LQR friendly, Meddling brothers, Coming Out, Loss of Virginity, Under-negotiated Kink, slight breathplay, Light Dom/sub, Aftercare, Angst with a Happy Ending)

yeah it's true (that I fell for you) by ThirtySixSaveFiles (E, 7k, LXC/NMJ, modern, Online Dating, conference attendance, Mistaken Identity, Interfering Siblings, Sexting)

~*~

17. hello! for the next itmf, can you guys rec fic: a) wwx and lan qiren being besties, like they're in good terms, or something like lan qiren realizes that wwx is a genius. b) maybe your fav fic/s for this month, any tag/s is okay :)) thank you! @httpskaixx

17A)

💖 Lessons relearned by Iamnotawriter (T, 44k, WangXian, LQR & WWX, Not Madam Yu Friendly, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Inventor WWX, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, No Golden Core Transfer, YZY Bashing)

🧡 Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 663k, WangXian, WIP, Fix-it of sorts, Talisman master WWX, Not JFM Friendly, Study Arc, Getting together, Fluff and Angst, Engagement)

17B)

Hua Xianle by Tiffany_Guinne (Not rated, 170k, hualian, wangxian, not jiang friendly, not YZY friendly, not JC friendly, not JFM friendly, WWX adopted by hualian, no golden core transfer, WIP)

🧡 Resplendence by FrozenMarVel ( E, 166k, WIP, WangXian, CS Lives, Rouge cultivator WWX, Crossdressing, Canon Divergence, Fix-It of sorts, Fluff, Explicit smut)

Ghost of Mine by SasukiMimochi (E, 113k, LSZ & WWX, LSZ & LWJ, LSZ & WWX & LWJ, wangxian, Golden Core Reveal, Gūsū Lán Forehead Ribbon, Demonic Cultivation, YLLZ WWX, Canon Temporary Character Death, Found Family, Hurt/Comfort, Supernatural Elements, Canon-Typical Violence, Post-First Siege of the Burial Mounds, Romance, Domestic Fluff, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Suicide, Past JYL/JZX, WIP)

The water keeps on flowing by IsilmeLasgalen (E, 114k, wangxian, WKX/ZZS, BSSR/LY, JYL/JZX, MXY/NHS, Cultivation Sect Politics, YLLZ WWX, WWX Isn't Adopted by the Jiāngs, Gūsū Lán Sect Rules, LWJ pov, WWX pov, The mistery of Madam Lan, The Power of Communication, Soft wangxian, The Ghost Path, Yīn Iron, outsider pov, multiple pov, Protective WWX, Morally Gray WWX, Bottom LWJ, Smut, Shameless wangxian, Angst, Fluff, Everyone Lives au)

The Scarlet Lotus by rainbowninja167 (M, 137k, WangXian, Marriage of Convenience, Secret Identity, Fix-It, Angst with a Happy Ending, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Canon-Typical Violence, canon-typical war crimes, Yunmeng Bros, the mortifying ordeal of getting seduced by your own husband, nonlinear chronology we die like cql, just kidding nobody dies in this fic, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, Miscommunication)

for you, andante by xuanxuanwo (ostentatiouslyrealistic) (T, 35k, WangXian, Modern AU, Music, Musicians, Pianist LWJ, Guitarist WWX, Kid Fic, Coffee Shops, Bookstores, Existential Crisis, Unrelated JGY & QS, Friendship, Romance, Light Angst, Happy Ending)

The Twin Blades of Yunmeng by GhostySword & ofmindelans (T, 82k, JC & WWX, wangxian, JC/NHS, canon divergence, JC & WWX, reconciliation, BAMF JC, protective LWJ, golden core reveal, angst w/ happy ending, slow burn, sect leader QS, WIP)

Hanlong by micratus (E, 282k, WangXian, Modern AU, Case Fic, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, But not only Cloud Recesses, Slow Burn, Oblivious WWX, Drunken Shenanigans, References to Drugs, Canon-Typical Violence, Action & Romance, Eventual Smut, Reincarnation, Humor, This is a translation, Modern with Cultivation)

burning camellias by AvoOwO (M, 284k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Prisoner of War, Genius WWX, Aftermath of Torture, Blood and Violence, Blood and Injury, BAMF WQ, BAMF WWX, BAMF WN, POV WWX, Hurt WWX, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Non-Consensual Body Modification, Sentient Burial Mounds, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Attempted Sexual Assault, No Golden Core Transfer, WWX Has No Golden Core, Golden Core Destruction | Golden Core Melting, Poisoning, Protective WQ, Medical Torture, Cannibalism, PTSD, Dubious Consent Consent Issues, Heavy Angst, MIND THE TAGS)

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If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

#wangxian #mdzs #wangxian fic recs #i'm in the mood for a fic #the untamed #wangxian fic search #wangxianficfinder #long post

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shadesofmauve · 8 months

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i love the word of god of Rhi's origin so much, that she was wante,d that she was loved, and for that brief time she had, she received the full warmth and love and soul of another human, and I think it did affect her, babies need SO MUCH and I believe that every moment of touch and love in those first few months help. she asn't in a dumpster, she was in someone's arms, and she's forever sought out ore contact, in every form it makes

Rhi, as time of the latest chapters, has a free supply of hugs, snugges, naps, snacks, and organisms (i don't know it fumbler will censor me) from Joker, so question is: what does hse need, or will need, that she's not getting? rhii, ask him dammit, he will tel yui ANythinG

(I put all three messages in one, thank you, drunk @musanocturnis :D. And I'm so glad you liked the background snippet -- I never intended to explain anything about her parents, but then it just *happened*. So now we know. Rhi Shepard: Her father was a test-tube and her mother was an optimist.)

It's kind of funny, because addressing emotional needs is a big part of the next chapter (the one I'm currently writing). It's more about Joker's end, but it deals with both of them.

For Rhi, there are two big issues:

The snuggle supply is not unlimited, because hiding fraternization means she doesn't see Joker nearly as often in private as she'd like. The empty cabin feels even more empty, because they had about six months of cohabitation, and she got used to it. Add on the new PTSD from solitary confinment, and it's a mess. But don't worry, EDI is still sometimes singing her to sleep.

Rhi is really BAD about recognizing when she needs a hug. She knows she doesn't deal well with solitude, but she's Not Great at paying attention to some of her other emotional needs. Good at seeing what OTHER people need, but not so great at, say, noticing that she's basically had an adoptive dad since she was 16, or that she needs a damn hug.

On a completely different note, my chronic-spellcheck-abuser brother once turned in a paper on "Mitosis in the single-celled orgasm" to his highschool bio teacher.

#making the words come #shades replies #Rhi Shepard

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dragonstepp · 1 year

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Oh lordy, lordy

It is nearly 5:00 in the morning here in Austin, and I have been drinking scotch (Highland Queen Majesty 16yo distilled in oak in the HIghlands) and looking at posts, and UTubes, and I have this to declared (and remember, I might just be a bit drunk).

I do not believe Sam and Cait are married. But if they are, what the fuck, who cares. I am 40 years older than he is, and don't have any romantic inclinations toward him, but if I did, I'm still too old for him, and certainly would not be an asset to him on any red carpet. Besides, I love him for his non-celebrity activities, so that is all a bunch of gossip to me.'

Second, I like this fellow who is 25 years old, has started following me (and I him), and is disabled because of child abuse, and can really identify with him because my mom abandoned my daddy when I was five (1946), and I also suffer from PTSD from a number a reasons, starting with losing my daddy when I was five, and having a step-dad who didn't like me (nor did my mother because she was jealous of me).

I lived in a fucking christian household due to my mom having the wrong ideas about christianity, and was denied a lot of stuff in high school where I should have had a great time.

The 60s. What a time for me. In the early days, I worked on a Dude Rance in Las Vegas (where my dad was living), and I was not a person anyone would to fashion themselves after me. I had two marriages that failed before was 24 (my fault, they were good men), and I gave birth to two daughters.

I moved back to Corpus Christi, TX in 1964, was in on the whole Beatles/Rolling Stones/Dave Clark 5/etc. revolution, and managed a merchant seamen's bar from 1964-1968. Sex was free, but birth control was not for single women. I gave birth to two more daughters in 1967 and 1969, I gave up all four daughters for adoption. I was a drunk. I did not believe I would live to the age of 30.

I saw Kennedy assassinated in 1963, MLK Jr. and Bobby in 1968, and a war that never stopped in Vietnam.

At the age of 30, I decided since I was still alive, I should change my ways and become a good citizen. I moved to austin in 1975, and worked 50 years of my life. I retired from the University of Texas in 2003. I worked during those years in Astronomy, public radio (and was a programmer of Celtic music during those years), and finally retired from the graduate studies department in 2003. I suffered from clinical depression and anxiety, was diagnosed with PTSD.

I was in therapy three times for suicidal thoughts, wrote my auto-biography in 2001, had a nervous breakdown in 2002, then covid and other things came along.

Today, at 82, I am sane; I love science fiction, college football (American), follow soccer, the Olympics (track and field, skiing, sledding, rugby, curling), am a pagan in the Celtic tradition, love everything Scotland, but suffer from arthritis in my knees (too much dancing and running) and shoulders, and love auto racing.

I am nuts about Sam Heughan, but he is 40 years younger than I am, and I mostly appreciate him for the things he does outside his celebrity.

I quite drinking when I was about 35, but these days, I drink Scotch, Gin, both from the Highlands, and order Scot-related foods from Amazon. My heart and soul belong to the Highlands. I watch a lot of sports on TV, enjoy car racing and science fiction, have a genius IQ (big deal), and my idea of heaven is where I will get all my questions answered. I am liberal socialist politically, support one regular organization that helps the downtrodden, hate Trump, and

that is about all you all need to know about me.

I am super intelligent, which does not go over with American men, but hay, what the hell, who cares. I am independent beyond imagination, and I love Tumblr. I was kicked off of Facebook, so my social networks are this one and Instagram.

Take me or leave me, but I am not your 82-year-old person, but your 82-year-young person who has seen a lot of life, and I will be alive as long as I can be.

Carol

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violetambergreen · 1 year

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I'm just going to introduce myself. As you can see, I am Larchkeygenxer, but you can call me Key for short.

I am trying to keep my real name out of this because much of what I may write here will talk about my family: parents, cousins, stepfamily. I will mention my younger siblings only in passing, as I have nothing to complain about regarding them.

I have a family with many alcoholics and drug abusers.

My father is a typical narcissist, manipulative, controlling, gaslighting a-hole who makes everything about himself Nd genuinely believes he is a rock star due to his middling career as a Karaoke DJ.

My mother is a recovering alcoholic, 23 years sober. Which is the span of my adult life, but drank heavily when I was a kid. Looking back on it with adult eyes, it was probably her coping mechanism for marriage to my dad. He forbade her friends, out of home working and she has told me stories of his manipulative ways, even hinting at sexual abuse.

I have one brother and sister from their marriage. My mom has a younger daughter, 16 years my junior, from my 1st stepfather. My father and 2nd stepmother adopted a 3 year old girl that same year.

A girl I essentially raised until they kicked me out and moves to another state.

I am a US Army Vet, a direct result of the aforementioned 'kick out' and suffer with multiple disabilities, including ADHD, PTSD (sexual harassment), insomnia, diabetes, Fibromyalgia, anxiety/depression and have been told I may be on the Autism spectrum. I suffer from a form of dyslexia with numbers, and frequent memory lapses due to all the stress from the other 1001 illnesses I have.

Oh, and I also have polycystic ovarian syndrome and was unable to bear children.

My next post will be the things that bring me joy.

I'm my mid forties now, and feel like this is my time to talk.

#narcissist #alcohlism #intro post #family #toxic relationship #toxic parent

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bbybadass · 4 years

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So I was named after my grandmother, my mom's mom.

Margaret.

My dad and his twin, my uncle, were adopted from Scotland when they were young. For decades, they didn't know much about where they came from, other than a city and a last name. They didn't even know their bio mom's first name. But in the past week, my uncle got in contact with someone who knew her. My grandmother, my dad's mom.

Margaret.

I bear the name of both of my grandmothers and I had no idea until yesterday.

She was kind, too. Their adopted mother wasn't kind, but Margaret was kind and loved.

You can't tell me this isn't fate.

#I actually have tears in my eyes as I write this #I suddenly have this huge connection to a part of myself that I've been wondering about for so long #There's also something that absolutely breaks my heart about this #Because my dad was abused by his adopted mother and has ptsd from it #Which gives me this huge connection to him bc of my ptsd and generational trauma #But fuck I wish he didn't ever have to go through that #But I hope knowing that his real blood was a lovely person gives him peace #I'm usually skeptical but yeah I can't help but believe in fate #Family #Revelation #mind blowing #Adoption

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davekat-sucks · 2 years

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Weird that people give Dave a pass for everything because he is an abuse victim.

My father was abused as a child, he was beat cruelly, insulted, and even once his father got this mirror, a mirror used to see behind horses, and had my father look at it and say he was nothing but a horse's ass. He was abused from birth until his mother took all her kids and ran away when he was still a child and eventually did get adopted by his mom's new husband. I can say he was a child who was abused in every way possible. HOWEVER. My father then later abused me. Still abuses me. From birth to present. He would do everything but hit me, because he knew my mom would literally kill him for that, but he still did everything he could to make my life hell.

My father's childhood is a reason to why he is the way he is, but is not an excuse. It doesn't make what he does okay. Nor would it be okay if I abused my wife or was toxic to her because of my #tragicbackstory

I do appreciate Dave's backstory, even his speech about abuse not making him stronger, like is stereotypically believed, but I still criticize him as a person. Rose Lalonde was neglected, depressed, cynical, all because her mother was such an alcoholic that she would rather drink than check on her daughter. We see Rose even threatening suicide with her strife vs her mom and the mom disregards it. Rose already had a pre disposition to alcoholism and addictive behavior due to her mom, but then deals with childhood depression and gets traumatic event after event happening and this results in her becoming an alcoholic too. And no, hussie, you don't cure alcoholism. Once you are an addict, you always are. It just changes over time. Rose literally believed even to her death in game over that SHE was a bad daughter, that her mom was great, she blamed herself. And no! Irl she would've been visited by cps. Although the mom is rich so probably nothing would've happened.

That's not even touching the tragedy of Jade Harley. Jade who could've seen her friends at any point, but Bec freaking kept her (ignorantly) captive on the island instead of teleporting her to see anyone. She was born alone and lived that way for her whole childhood.

I even criticize Dad Egbert, who people view as a saint and if you criticize him you must be a douchebag. John Egbert clearly suffered with depression even before the game began. He spoke in the first act about losing interest in things he used to love, being frustrated even, he also kept telling his dad he didn't like Betty crocker shit anymore but he didn't listen! Any good parent would see that something is wrong and get their kid help. Love does not cure depression. I think dad did love John, but that alone doesn't help mental illness. John in the epilogues even suffers from extreme depression, guilt, dread, and feels empty. He was also traumatized like the other kids, hell, seeing his dad dead would be enough to get diagnosed with PTSD for some psychs. But nooooooo he is perfectly fine! His dad is soooo nice why should he be upset? Why be so sad John? (I'm mocking Rose, who literally was like "yeah you're dad is nice so why are you upset John." I'll criticize everyone here)

People replying to you need to stop being so vitriolic. DaveKat can be fun, but dear God, if you think hussie put it in for anything but brownie points you are deluded. The man who knew he had bad pr because he literally had Karkat calling people the r slur, he even called Vriska the f slur due to her future self's screen name. Feferi called Jade the r slur. Vriska is a sexual abuser and also ableist early on. The man even said Kanaya wasn't a lesbian, just had a fetish for women. "TROLL JEWISH." Is apparently what Terezi is because she has a big nose. We have a word for that fellas! Hell, in the epilogues, DIRK CONTROLS DAVE TO MAKE OUT WITH KARKAT. He controls Rose/Manipulates her and she calls him Daddy and flirts with him. He uses his powers to do this. He even laments and is made at calliope for not making Dave and Karkat make out in candy and instead having them just talk. Hussie views DaveKat as a novelty. He views RoseMary probably as a fetish (a ship I don't like, sorry Kanaya, you don't exist outside of rose anymore and never will, good thing in hs2 you get cucked in both timelines)

Hell, let's address Jade and Rose's kid. I'm trans. People say Jade is trans because she has a dog dick from bec, this is even canonical. Yeah. Why people are okay with this I'll never know. But Rose cheats on Kanaya. It's cheating. It's straight up cheating. It's not an open relationship. It's clearly closed. Hell, in the other epilogue she becomes a robot and says fuck you Kanaya I'm with my kind of dad now. (Then again the hs2 writers actually don't like rosemary so. But if hussie didn't enjoy this then he would've said something about it. I guess as long as they don't touch his femdom fetish Vriska he is okay with it)

Everything you said here is very well said! Say it loud and proud!

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agustdakasuga · 3 years

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Between The Bloodshed | Chapter 14

Genre: Mafia!AU, Angst, Romance, Fluff

Pairing: OT7 x Reader

Characters: Doctor!Reader, Gangster!Namjoon, Gangster!Seokjin, Gangster!Yoongi, Gangster!Hoseok, Gangster!Jimin, Gangster!Taehyung, Gangster!Jungkook

Summary: Being a freelance doctor, this was just supposed to be any other job, helping a private client and taking care of him through his recovery. But you were not expecting to get caught in something so much darker that would change your life entirely.

Going to Florida on vacation also seemed to be the perfect time to find out where the other boys came from and their pasts.

Warning: This story is fictional and has nothing to do with real life events or the actual members of BTS. It may contain depictions of violence, blood shed/ gore and mentions of abuse. Please read at your own discretion.

Chapter warning(s): The boys share their pasts, which can be rough. Mentions of suicide, past abuse, PTSD. There’s also quite some drinking in this chapter.

“He’s fine. Just a little bit too much sun.” You chuckled in a whisper, tucking Jin under the blanket. With that, you exited the room with the 6 others. The oldest had felt a little faint after playing in the sun, which led to his current state.

“We should-”

RINGGGGGGG

“Ugh, one minute.” Jimin took his phone out of his pocket, walking away to answer his call. You and Jungkook looked at each other, shrugging. You headed to the living room, with you draping your legs over Hoseok to watch television, not that Hoseok minded.

“Jin hyung is asleep... That means his snacks are unguarded!” Jungkook shot up from the couch, running to the pantry.

“Nothing stand between him and food.” Taehyung raised an eyebrow. Namjoon shook his head and chuckled, bidding all of you goodbye before leaving with a book tucked under his arm.

“What’s for dinner?” Yoongi asked.

“I think steak and pasta.” Jungkook said, mouth stuffed to the brim with cookies. The staff that worked here had the same schedule as those back in Korea.

“What shall we do tonight?”

“I don’t know. We should stay in on our first night. To just... chill.” Hoseok shrugged and everyone nodded in agreement.

“Even when we put a vacation notice out, work doesn’t seem to stop coming.” Jimin stormed in, complaining. Taehyung raised an eyebrow at his best friend, shifting to let him sit on the couch.

“That’s what you get for opening a new place 2 weeks before the vacation. And a big place, with a lot of manpower needed.” Jungkook scoffed. Jimin sighed, full of regret. He had opened a new male host lounge for ladies 2 weeks ago and safe to say, the business was booming. His phone was ringing non-stop from wanting business partners.

“I’ll just leave it to the others to handle.” Jimin said.

“Yeah, put the phone away. You’re here to relax.” You put your hands behind your head.

“I’m guessing you did the same?” Yoongi faced you.

“My family knows I’m on vacation. There’s an emergency number if they really need to reach me, which I doubt they will. It’s my last vacation before I have to hear my mother start nagging me again.” You rolled your eyes.

“Nag you?” Taehyung tilted his head.

“My brother’s, her star child, is coming into town with my very pregnant sister-in-law for the birth of her second grandchild.” You explained and the boys all nodded, understanding. At the ball where they met your parents, there was a brief mention of your older brother.

“I was an only child. Never had siblings. Omma was worried that if she had another, he or she would come out sick like me.” Jimin forced a smile.

“I’m sorry, Chim.” You reached over to hold his hand.

“It’s okay. Fortunately, Yoongi hyung was there to break me out of the hospital.” He turned to the older, who was sitting on the adjacent couch, sipping from his red wine glass.

“You broke him out of a hospital?” Your eyes widened. Yoongi let out a long sigh, placing his glass on the table.

“Since she couldn’t figure out the reason why Jimin was always sick, Mrs Park thought the only way to provide Jimin the care he needed was to lock him in a hospital.” He explained. Jimin cleared his throat.

“I first met Yoongi hyung at a martial arts convention. Since I used to train in kendo, omma let me go but I couldn’t participate in the demonstration. When he found out that omma checked me into the hospital, he got me out and brought me to join the family. Even when I was sick, Yoongi hyung and Namjoon hyung took care of me.” Jimin gave a small smile.

“I mean, since we’re telling our family stories, my mother abandoned me when I was younger, at an amusement park. I joined an orphanage after.” Hoseok said.

“Yoongi hyung’s father adopted me to be hyung’s playmate but that was it. We could only see each other during playtime. Other than that, I stayed in the small hut in the backyard.” Hoseok continued.

“It was practically a tool shed with a mattress.” Yoongi said bitterly.

“Yoongi, so your father...”

“He was rich, powerful, as was Namjoon’s father. We had been friends for a long time since our fathers were friends. After our fathers died, we dissolved their associations and formed our own.” Yoongi explained.

“I see... I didn’t know both your fathers were also... in the same line of business.” You tried to speak.

“With the way my father treated Hoseok and my mother, we don’t bring him up. Same with Namjoon.” Yoongi said but there was a warning tone in his voice.

“I-Is it, my turn?” Jungkook lifted his head.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to.” You comforted. Jungkook took a deep breath, shaking his head. If anything, he trusted you and wanted you to know his background.

“I was quite a small kid, so I was generally quite quiet in school. I had one older brother. Mum and dad worked a lot so it was mostly my brother and me. At first, hyung was the best brother I could ever ask for. He took care of me, protected me, everything.” Jungkook gulped.

“Then one day, he started treating me like I was invisible, at school and at home. That progressed to him hitting me and bullying me, hurting me.” He said sadly.

“Jungkook...” Jimin said sadly.

“Namjoon hyung was passing by an alley when my brother almost beat me to death. He brought me to the hospital to get treated. Since then, I’ve been living with him.” Jungkook finished.

“Did your parents come find you?” You asked.

“They never believed me when I told them hyung hurt me. He must have told them I ran away or something since he thinks he left me for dead.”

“But you’re stronger now.” Taehyung patted Jungkook’s head. Considering Taehyung didn’t start his background story, the others assumed that he already told you about him.

“Dinner is served.” The butler informed, breaking the thick tension in the air from all the heavy conversations.

“I’ll get the others.” You said, going to head upstairs. The first person you checked on was Jin, he was still fast asleep, which you let him be. Namjoon was standing in the hallways, outside of Jin’s bedroom.

“I heard what the boys told you.” He said. You nodded your head in acknowledgement.

“(y/n), I think you know that with such backgrounds, it’s not all black and white for them. On top of always falling ill, Jimin lived with a fear of being a burden, like how his own mother treated him. Yoongi hyung lives with the guilt of how his father treated Hoseok. He feels the need to make it up to him with his life.” Namjoon started.

“Hoseok is afraid of abandonment. Taehyung dealt with meltdowns, panic attacks, so much trauma. You’ve seen it, he’s still not over what happened to him.”

“And Jungkook, I can’t tell you the number of times I had to stop him from taking his own life. He was afraid of being hurt by the one he loved, just like before.” Namjoon sighed.

“I know, Namjoon. It must have been a lot for you and Yoongi to face, along with your own fears. But look at who you saved. Where would they all be now if you and Yoongi didn’t help them?” You placed a hand on his shoulder.

“Everyone comes with their own battle scars. But that’s what makes us human and survivors, right?” You smiled.

“You always know what to say, doc.” Namjoon chuckled.

“Of course. I’m the best, am I not?” You nudged him, making him laugh even more. With that, the two of you headed downstairs to the dining room, where the others were seated around the table. Namjoon sat at the head of the table while you sat between Jungkook and Yoongi.

“Let’s eat.” Namjoon waved for the wait staff to bring in the trays of food and pour the drinks. Even if the dinner was quieter than usual, it wasn’t suffocating. You’ve reached a new level of understanding with the boys.

“What shall we do tomorrow?” Jimin asked.

“I wanna go look around the city. If possible. Maybe buy some things for myself.” You shrugged.

“Yes! Shopping! We’ll come too!” Taehyung and Jungkook cheered. You smiled, somehow knowing that it was going to be chaotic with the boys. Hoseok clapped his hands in excitement.

“What if I wanna go on my own?” You raised an eyebrow.

“No way! It’s not safe for you to be on your own.” Jungkook shook his head, putting his arms in a cross.

“Are you saying I am not capable to defending myself?” You asked him with a smirk.

“Ooh, you’ve done it now, Kook.”

“Yeah, even I don’t go there.” Yoongi decided to join in on the fun of teasing the maknae. Jungkook’s eyes widened when he realised what he did, immediately facing you and rubbing his hands together in an apologetic matter.

“I’m sorry! You are very much capable of defending yourself! Even better than me or anyone else because you’re a strong, independent woman! I would never doubt your strength! Please don’t kill me!” He rambled on. You threw your head back in laughter, reaching over to pat his head. Even the others just looked on in amusement.

“Alright, let’s stop teasing, Koo.” You said.

After dinner, everyone was gathered back in the living room, watching some show that was playing on the television.

“The night is young! We should party!” Hoseok declared.

"This is not going to end well.” Yoongi clicked his tongue with a shake of his head. It was obvious he had to deal with his drunk brothers multiple times before.

“I brought drinks and snacks!” Jungkook brought two big trays out, one with different alcoholic drinks and the other filled with snacks, courtesy of Jin’s stash. You took a bottle of beer. Hoseok and Namjoon did the same, clinking bottles with you. Jungkook grabbed some soju.

“Hyung? You want one?” Jungkook offered a filled shot glass to Taehyung. Taehyung, who doesn’t usually drink, shrugged and accepted it. Yoongi stuck to his whiskey like always.

“Honestly didn’t think the drinking was gonna start on our first night here. But I’m not one to complain.” You shrugged.

“We’re on vacation. It’s always drinking time.” Hoseok said.

“I agree!” Jungkook grinned. You snorted in response. Jimin decided to have soju with the other two, taking an empty shot glass. Jungkook happily filled it up for him.

“Hey...” Jin stood at the stairwell.

“Hey, Jin. How are you feeling?” You asked as you stood up to head to him. Jin gave a small smile and a thumbs up.

“Are those my snacks?!” His eyes widened as he marched over.

“Shot?” Jungkook offered as a consolation. Jin glared at the maknae but took the tiny glass, glancing over at you. You shrugged, nodding your head in approval. Hoseok and Taehyung shifted to give Jin space to sit down. Everyone with their drinks, cheered to your first night on vacation, taking a swig. You leaned against Jimin’s side.

“Do you want dinner, Jin?”

“Nah, I’m fine with the snacks and drinks.” He waved you off.

“Alright but if you feel dizzy again, stop and rest. And tomorrow, please remember to hydrate yourself when out.” You lectured. The boys all groaned, even if you were only directing your words at Jin.

“Now you’re nagging.” Taehyung boxed his ears, whining. You rolled your eyes, reaching to smack him.

That night, when all the boys retreated to their rooms, passed out drunk, you were in your room spending some alone time. There was a knock on your door and you stood up from your bed, shuffling over to see who it was.

“Hobi?” You were shocked.

“C-Can I come in?” He rubbed the back of his neck. You nodded your head, stepping aside for him to enter.

“Can’t sleep?” You asked softly.

“Just a lot on my mind.” He admitted with a soft sigh. You sat on your bed, legs dangling off the side. You patted the space beside you and Hoseok gladly accepted, sitting beside you as the moon shined in.

“Bringing up the past isn’t easy. It opens a lot of scars you thought were healed, memories that you thought was locked away, feelings that you thoughts were gone. It’s okay, Hobi.” You whispered with a soft smile, wrapping an arm around him. Hoseok placed his head on your shoulder.

“It’s okay.” You comforted.

“She left me there, all alone. For strangers to take me. And I probably will never know the reason why until the day I die.” He said aimlessly.

“I’m sorry you had to go through that, Hobi.” You squeezed his hand.

“Yoongi hyung still feels so guilty for what his father did when he adopted me. But I always think that even if he did treat me badly, I still got to leave the orphanage and meet Yoongi hyung.”

“And then you met the rest of the boys. Look how inseparable you all are now.” You stroked his head.

“I also got to meet you.” Hoseok added.

“I’m just there to clean your cuts and take care of you when you’re sick.” You laughed.

“That’s not true. You mean a lot to me and everyone else, more than you’d think, (y/n).” Now, it was Hoseok holding your hands, looking into your eyes, his full of honesty and sincerity.

You woke up the next morning, rubbing your temples, feeling the slight effect of the alcohol from the night before. Hoseok was still passed out beside you, sleeping soundly. You got out of bed quietly, washing up before heading downstairs. The house was quiet, signalling that maybe no one else was awake, still sleeping the alcohol off.

“You’re up?” You nearly jumped when Yoongi appeared, drinking a cup of iced coffee, his hair slightly damp and messy from his shower.

“Yeah. I need a hangover cure and a coffee.” You went to the kitchen. The maid brought you a cup of water and the small bottle of hangover cure. You downed the bitter liquid following that with water.

“Here.” Yoongi fixed you an iced coffee of your own.

“Thank you.” You sipped it.

“Hoseok... he’s with you?” Yoongi cleared his throat as he asked. You nodded your head with a hum.

“Yeah. He came over to talk then we just fell asleep after.” You explained. Yoongi gave a nod, moving to sit out on the deck. You trailed behind him quietly, taking the seat across him. All you heard were the crashing of the waves and the strong wind rustling the trees.

“I’m part of the reason he’s like that.” Yoongi spoke.

“Why do you burden yourself with that?” You asked back. Yoongi blinked, seemingly surprised by your words.

“You know it’s not true, you know that Hobi doesn’t think that, and yet you force yourself to live with the guilt. You know that you’re not like your father, whatever he did to Hobi was out of your control.” You said.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” Yoongi said with gritted teeth.

“Exactly, I don’t. But what I see is you feeling sorry for yourself and Hobi being worried about showing his emotions because he doesn’t want you to start feeling guilty again.”

“He said that?”

“Not exactly. It’s pretty obvious to a bystander.” You shrugged.

“Yoongi, I have better things to do than to stand here and taunt you. The only people there were you and Hobi. Will anyone ever understand what each of you went through? I don’t know. You and I both know that Hobi holds whatever happened close to him. But he sees the light, even in a dark situation. If he can do that, I don’t see why you can’t.” You said.

“I know.” Was all he could reply.

“I’m going to check on Jin, okay?” You stood up. But you were yanked back by your wrist. Yoongi wrapped his arms around your waist, pressing his face into your middle.

“I hate that you’re right.” He mumbled. You let out a soft hum, patting the top of his fluffy hair. When Yoongi released you, you looked down at him.

“You saved so many of them, Yoongs. Give yourself more credit. They all look up to you for a reason.” You laughed.

“Go check on Jin hyung.” He said, patting your hip.

“Right on it, sir.” You saluted. That made Yoongi break out into a small smile as he watched you leave. You hummed a random tune as you headed upstairs to see how Jin was doing today.

“Doc? You’re here.” He slowly opened his eyes, squinting to focus his vision on you. He gave you a sleepy smile. You smiled softly as you nodded, tucking a stray strand of hair behind your ear as you placed your hand on his forehead. He wasn’t warm to the touch.

“How are you feeling?” You whispered.

“Okay. Sleepy... Hungover.” He chuckled, a little embarrassed.

“I’d bet. You can come down later to get some hangover cure. Luckily I told the butler to stock the house when we arrived yesterday.” You patted his shoulder, making him laugh.

“(y/n)!” When you exited Jin’s room, you saw a shirtless Jungkook barreling down the hallway, headed straight for you. You jumped back but he caught you.

“Good morning, Koo.” You said in amusement as he hugged you. He mumbled something in his sleepy stupor.

“What are you saying? I can’t understand you.”

“I went to your room to look for you but you weren’t there. I thought Hobi hyung was you but it wasn’t. Why is Hobi hyung in your bed? Where were you? Ugh... I have a headache and I’m hungry.” He rambled.

“Alright, alright. Slow down. I went to get some coffee to help my hangover and was with Yoongi on the deck. Then I went to check on Jin. Hobi just stayed the night after we talked. I have alka seltzer to help your hangover and I think the chefs are cooking hangover soup for all of us. Would you also please put on a shirt?” You answered all his questions, ending with one of yours.

“I’m sleepy.”

“I thought you were hungry?”

“I don’t know! My head hurts.” He whined. You sighed, patting his back as you led him back to his room.

“You stay here. I’ll bring you a hangover cure then you can see how you feel after that.” You instructed. He nodded his head like an obedient child. You went downstairs to get a small bottle and a glass of water.

“Thank you.” He received the two, drinking one after another, cringing slightly at the bitterness.

“It should help your headache and funny stomach. I’ll go check on the others to see if they need help.” You told him, tucking him back into bed under the blanket.

“Will you come back?” He held your hand.

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fatalitysficbakery · 2 years

Text

Innocent Verdict. (Joy Struthers-Rossi x Black Fem!Reader)

Genre; Angst/Fluff.

Warnings; VOMIT, Talks of Abuse, Child Molestation, Rape, Our Corrupt Justice system that doesn’t protect black women, hotchner being a supportive dad figure, PTSD!reader (i have ptsd so i’m gonna write it how my attacks feel in my experience but everyone’s attacks won’t feel the same.), Adult adoption (Not common, but happens sometimes. this is what Aaron is to the reader, her father), yes Elle is in this. why? because in heavens bakery she never left 😍. Also- subtle hints of an age regression relationship between Joy and Reader(coping mechanism, nothing sexual ya nasties), reader has autism!

Synopsis; After an innocent verdict turns your life upside down, your wife is there to help you back up. Along with your Quantico family.

↳ ❤︎ Heaven’s Baked Goods (Masterlist) ❤︎

↳ ❝He who spares the guilty threatens the innocent❞⁣ -Legal Maxim

~•~~•~•~~•~•~~•~ + ~•~~•~•~~•~•~~•~

Innocent. The judge had ruled him innocent. Your mouth went dry, the scene went blurry, and you could only barely hear your wife asking if you were okay. It was hot and stuffy in the room and you felt dizzy, you needed out. Turning, you run from the courtroom before anyone has a chance to stop you, the bathroom seemed so far away, your stomach lurched— You only just made it before you spilled your guts into the nearest toilet, tears in your eyes. It was all for naught. The trauma. The abuse. You could still feel his every touch like it was seared into your skin, a memory of a sin you never asked to commit. At least— A sin is what he called it; Begging for forgiveness whilst he dealt trauma to your skin, and yet he never stopped.

The door swung open, scaring you into a corner of the stall. Another scar he’d left on you psyche— PTSD. He was coming back, he was gonna take you again, you weren’t safe, it was him, it was him; Until it wasn’t. Your wife bent down in front of you holding your inhaler, her face was his for a moment, her voice was his voice— You curled into yourself to make it stop until you heard a familiar nickname, “Bumblebee”. Your breathing finally slowed as she helped you take your inhaler and stand up. You grimaced her way and sighed, “Take me home”.

↳

Y/N Hotchner-Rossi. She’d met Joy Rossi after she’d met Aaron Hotchner, the man who’d saved and adopted her. Ever since her mother had died her step-father had turned his abuse from his wife to his only step-daughter. While his sons got his love and affection, she got abused, molested, and neglected. When she found Aaron, she was traumatized, barely a shell of a person so he took her in. He gave her the father figure she never had. He gave her the courage to stand up against her abuser and finally take him to court. But what was it all for? To see his smugness as he won one over her once again? Surely, Hotchner couldn’t predict this— He told her this would be hard, it didn’t mean she’d win but it meant she would fight, all with the help of him, the team, and Joy. Her Joy. It was puppy love the moment they’d met at a BBQ at Aaron’s— Celebrating the fact she’d got into college and moved away from her dad to her very own apartment. Joy was there with Kai, It turned out she’d gotten divorced after realizing she wasn’t into men at all. They clicked instantly and from there bloomed a friendship that turned into a lovestory no one was able to predict, not even our beloved profilers. They’d gotten married three years into their relationship when it happened— The last assault.

Y/n felt confident she could face the man now that she was no longer his daughter, he happened to be in the same coffee shop one day when she realized she couldn’t but it was too late to realize that with a gun pressed against your back. He assaulted her again in his truck, smiling and telling her it was just like old times before leaving her a shell once more. That’s when she finally took Aaron up on his offer to take the fool to court. Now it was her that felt like the biggest fool. She could see how the judge favored him from the beginning and in her gut she knew it was doomed from the start but she kept at it. She wanted to show him he had no power over her. Now she realized that he did— Or at least that’s how it felt.

“How is she”? Garcia walked up to the group of Agents, noticing that Joy and Y/n were escaping from the back of the court, fearing the cameras that would ambush them the second they walked out in the front.

“Not good. Joy’s taking her home, she had a panic attack”. Hotch looked over to his daughter, concern painted on his face. He wanted to go hug her, but he knew that right now all she needed was to go home and let this verdict sink in before picking herself back up. It was never an easy thing to do, the law had favorites and unfortunately a black woman testifying against her white step-father wasn’t one of them.

“The judge was a piece of work. We should’ve known this would happen”. Dereks jaw clenched, he was angry. You’d turned into one of his favorite people— His bestfriend, and to see the justice system fail you so badly made him want to do nothing more than turn around and tell that judge what’s what.

“I’m gonna go check on her later if either of you would like to come with me”.

JJ smiled sadly, Garcia and Elle quickly nodded and although Hotchner wanted to say ‘Hell yeah I wanna go check on my daughter’ He didn’t know if it was the best idea for a male figure to be in her face at the moment— Especially knowing of her PTSD. He remembered the first time they argued, it was something petty and silly, it wasn’t even an argument really. It was them baking a cake for Beth and Jack and they disagreed on the frosting. Hotch raised a spatula to put frosting on her nose when she’d suddenly backed away and curled into the fetal position begging him to wait because she had school the next morning and didn’t want her teachers to see the bruising, something she frequently begged her step-father to do as a teen because she knew him abusing her would happen either way.

“You guys go. I’m not sure it’s a good idea for her to be around a bunch of men right now. She has bad PTSD”.

~•~~•~•~~•~•~~•~ + ~•~~•~•~~•~•~~•~

You were silent the entire way home and even at home you still weren’t talkative, one thing hadn’t changed though, Jordan noticed— You clung to her for comfort, looking around at everything else with an unsure paranoid glance but not her. You seemed to cling tighter, stare at her more for safety, security. Even through the midst of all the bullshit, Joy was glad she could grant you that.

“Do you wanna go upstairs and speak to Kai, Bumblebee”? Joy asked softly, standing you in front of her, a sweet inviting smile on her face to put you at ease— You nodded lightly but it seemed Kai had beaten you to it, running down the steps to greet you and Joy. Joy saw the look in your eyes and shushed Kai as you hid behind her, the footsteps triggering.

“Mama, why does Ma look so sad”? Kai asked, trying to move to hug you. Joy stopped him. Kai didn’t understand PTSD, let alone the trauma you’ve been through that would’ve made you adverse to his hugs, he knew you’d always loved them so why not now?

“Ma just needs some space right now, okay? Go wash up for dinner and you can talk to her then. Okay baby? Go wash up if you wanna spend time with ma”.

Kai’s eyes lit up; You were his favorite person, he immediately ran back upstairs to wash up, much to your discomfort, flinching, you covered your ears and Joy cringed.

“No running”! She tried to say loud enough for him to hear but soft enough not to trigger you.

“Hey, hey, hey. Come here, Bumblebee”. She turns back to you, opening her arms and you immediately take the offer to jump in them and break down into choked up sobs— Rubbing your back, Joy sighed. She didn’t know what the judge was thinking, there was piles of evidence that your step-father had done this, hell there were even videos and yet..

“Can you do something for me, Princess”?

You looked up at her with those big doe eyes she adored so much, the eyes she hated seeing the hurt and pain in— She squeezed you lightly for your comfort and hers, to reassure you but also to reassure herself, to reassure herself that you were safe and nothing could harm you with her around. That’s what it meant.

“Can you go take a relaxing bubble bath with Maxine the duck while I order dinner? I’ll get your favorite and bring up some strawberries so you can eat them in the tub and watch your favorite show on the projector— Sound good”?

Although you hadn’t talked, she was proud of you for each nod or shake of the head you gave her. It let her know you were still that strong warrior she’d fallen in love with. It let her know things would turn out fine.

↳

Joy was finally alone for a moment and able to process this, herself. She finally cried. The hurt on your face was something she hated to see and the moment you’d ran from the courtroom, her heart shattered; You looked so small and fragile curled in the corner of that bathroom stall, not recognizing her for a moment and backing away so she wouldn’t hurt you. You were so strong in her eyes. You are so strong in her eyes. You’d helped her through everything and now she’d help you. She’d be your backbone when you couldn’t stand on your own.

She was snapped out of her stupor when the doorbell rang, clearing her throat she wipes the tears away and goes to get the doorbell, having a pretty good idea who was behind it.

When she opened the door, JJ, Kate, Elle, Tara, and Garcia stood there bearing food and gifts, sad smiles on their faces.

“Can we come in”? Kate asked softly almost like she didn’t want to scare Y/n either. Everyone was cautious and for good reason, that’s what Y/n needed at the moment. Cautious.

“Uh, y-yeah of course. I just sent Y/n upstairs to take a bubble bath. She’s not talking right now but I’m sure she’ll be happy to see you guys” Stepping aside she lets them in and tries to hide her sadness and the fact she’d been crying; Unfortunately, Garcia’s expertise included tech and empathy.

“Oh, lovebug. You look like hell, I knew this would be hard on both of you so I brought something for you as well. I couldn’t find that book you wanted so I hope a knitted plushie is okay”.

Joy laughed, a genuine one. Garcia never stopped being herself, even in the roughest of moments.

“This is why we love you, Pen. Our ball of energy and sunshine” Elle chimes in, putting the sushi on the table and taking a seat. Joy looked around at all the support you had, an entire team of people that loved you, an entire family that loved you. She started crying then and there, all of the women cooing and gathering around her to give her a group hug.

↳

No one was expecting to hear Y/n’s voice for awhile, she was known to go non-verbal for periods of times after an attack and Joy usually just let her be, comforting her and being close to her, because that’s where Y/n felt safest. In Joy’s arms.

“Can I get a hug too”? Your voice croaked out, raspy from all the sobbing you’d done. The women flinched and turned to see you, opening their arms happily.

“Wouldn’t be a group hug without our beloved Bunny” Tara jokes as you walk into their arms, covered in the warmth of a group hug with some of your favorite humans.

Bunny. That made you smile. You’d been given that name the first night your dad let you meet the team, you were a bubbly person, and when overexcited you’d hop around and bounce a little— That’s when Reid dubbed you Bunny, saying that you’d acted just like one and even assigning you a breed “Harlequin rabbit” and from then on, that was your name for everyone.

~•~~•~•~~•~•~~•~ + ~•~~•~•~~•~•~~•~

“Are you ready to go in, Bumblebee”? Joy asked, kissing the back of your hand. You were currently stood in front of your fathers house for the first time in months. Sure, you’d seen all of the Quantico men but in small doses because of the trauma you’ve been through they didn’t want to overwhelm you. Finally, one day after months of therapy and your psychiatrist suggesting it, you, Hotch, and Joy planned a barbecue, to get you back in the swing of things.

“I think I am, hold my hand the entire time”? You asked, mostly joking but Joy would do it anyway.

“Of course, mama. I’ll be right there with you, okay? If at any point you get overwhelmed just come get me and we’ll leave immediately. Understood”? She was stern with her words but you knew she was just looking out for you, protecting your peace and security. You didn’t know why it made you so emotional, but you found yourself hugging your wife tightly. She’d been your rock for 4 1/2 years now and that hadn’t changed. Your safety lie with her and so did your heart, soul, and body.

“I love you, I just- Thank you, Honeycomb. I truly don’t know what I’d do without you”.

When you pulled away, you stood on your tiptoes, pressing a short but sweet kiss to her lips; She was shocked for a moment before kissing back, you hadn’t called her Honeycomb in a bit— She didn’t realize how much she actually missed the name until she felt a tear fall from her eye. She never felt a lacking of appreciation from you, she knew with you she’d always feel loved and cared for; Even through your toughest hours, you always made sure she knew you cared. Whether it be through small touches, simple gestures, a note in her bag when she left for work, you’d always find a way.

“I, I love you too, Bumblebee. I got you, yeah? Let’s go in, people are probably worried”.

You nodded and kissed her cheek before finally opening the door, taking a deep breath because with this team? There’d always be chaos, but that’s why you loved them.

↳

When they saw you and Joy, everyone came rushing over voices overlapping each other before the booming voice of Tara stops them, “You’re gonna overwhelm the poor girl, back it up and give her some space”!

You and Joy giggled watching them frantically back away and apologize. That’s when you met the eyes of Aaron and Jack. Rushing over to your father and little brother, you hug Hotch first and then turn around to pick up Jack, “Jeez, kid. You’re getting too big for me to pick up anymore”. you pouted, booping the young boys nose before putting him down to go play with Kai who’d spent the night at their home. Too excited and impatient to wait till the next day to see them.

“Are you doing okay”? Hotch asked softly, rubbing your shoulder.

“Is it true? T-that he died”? You answered his question with another, your wife had followed you, her arms wrapping around your waist, resting her head on yours.

Aaron squeezes your hand, “He was murdered. Your 12-year-old step-brother Joshua was a victim of his after you’d left and after the verdict came out. He felt hopeless. The other three ambushed him after he’d come home drunk one night and assaulted Josh. They found Joshua unconscious and bleeding. That was the last straw for them”.

Your throat felt tight, you didn’t know what you were feeling. A strange mix of relief and sadness. Sad that your kid brother had gone through it too, he was the only brother that actually cared for you— The others would rather watch and laugh. You also felt relief, he could no longer hurt you or anyone else; The mental wounds would never fully heal, they’d scar over but at least you were safe now, at least Joshua was safe now.

“I’m just glad Joshua is safe now but…You know what sucks”? You laughed humorlessly, clutching onto your wife, your face nearly in her chest as a tear fell.

“They laughed when he did it to me”.

The team came to you, along with with the Jack and Kai. Joy held you against her, and as you cried you found yourself looking around through the blurriness of your tears and realized— This was the life you’d been dreaming of every night after your mother died and your step-father assaulted you. This was the family you envisioned, the love you fantasized of when in the clutches on the slimey monster you were forced to call dad.

Now is when you realized— Innocent Verdict or no innocent verdict. Dead or Alive. Luis Jones no longer held any power over you. You’d found your family, you’d found your way. You picked yourself up and went back to school, you worked your dream job at a doggy daycare…This was everything 10-year-old you would’ve wished for when he hovered on top of her with the face of a monster. This was all 17-year-old you would write about in her journal in the dark of that basement with nothing but a lantern light. And this? This was what 19-year-old Y/n was seeking when she’d met Aaron Hotchner. Her real dad.

↳

A family was something I’d been seeking out since my mothers death. Luis took a lot away from me, but then I looked up. I looked up at Joy Rossi. I remember Luis finding out I liked women and deciding he needed to rape the gay away. Well, Luis— You don’t hold any power in my life anymore, and I’ll make damn sure you have no power in Joshua’s.

Joy looks down at me and smiles gently, like always when she wanted to help reassure and make me feel safe; It always worked. For so, so long I never had a place to belong and now I not only have a big beautiful family but the most amazing wife. I couldn’t ask for more.

“I love you”. Joy mouths to me and I can’t help but lean up to kiss her cheek, ignoring the gentle teasing from the others, or the small ‘ews’ from from the boys.

“I love you even more”, I mouth back, and I mean it. With everything inside me, I mean it.

↳ “The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb”.

~•~~•~•~~•~•~~•~ + ~•~~•~•~~•~•~~•~

A/N: Because Joy is one of my favorite Criminal Minds minor characters.

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cutecatpumpkin · 7 years

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if i ever create a cartoon clay will be the main character

#jams art #oc #clay #i started thinking about him again #hes the only oc i have that instantly brings a smile to my face #the cartoon would be about dealing with ptsd from parental abuse #the 3 main kids would show off 3 different types of parental abuse and 3 different ways they cope with it #clay had a physically abusive father and he deals with it at first by distrusting boys and deals with internalized hatred because hes a boy #but as the show goes on he learns healthy coping habits and becomes a happy go lucky boy #his friend has neglectful parents and he responds by feeling hes not important thus he shuts himself off and doesnt interact with anybody #until clay befriends him that is #and then the big bully of the school has parents that constantly verbally abuse her and eachother so she reacts by being an angry bully #and she realizes over the course of the show that shes trans and shes afraid to tell her parents cause theyre always so mean #but clays new adoptive parents are there to help all 3 of them through their struggles #and theyre a happily married lesbian couple #and clay and the bully may develop crushes on eachother idk #but yeah this idea of mine always makes me feel excited #cause ive had an abusive mother and my dad couldnt be around much since he always had to work to provide for me #i just feel like its important to teach kids that even if they hurt itll be ok eventually #even if their parents dont love them like they should that theyre still loved by friends and people definitely care for them #i know i needed to hear that message as a kid #but i didnt so i have unhealthy coping skills that im still trying to unlearn #and i will be unlearning it for years #and i'll never be free from my ptsd but that doesnt mean that i can never be happy #i just want to help ease the pain of others lives

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lightvsdark18 · 2 years

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Because of the release of Security Breach, I'll talk about my Au for the fnaf universe. Fazbear Entertainment is a family run company and the animatronics are humans who help run their family's business or dress up as animal characters to entertain the children.

William Afton was the former business partner of the CEO of Fazbear Entertainment and was fired, then arrested for destruction of property.

The main band are for the big kids and toy band is for the little kids. Gilbert and Sebastian sometimes do special concerts for charity (or revisit the old days.)

Andy and Brian are in the prize counter. Brian comes to the Pizza Plex after school and offers to help out.

Sebastian is a trans man and Andy is non-binary. (Don't know everyone's sexuality yet, but do know Frankie is gay).

Old Band, Main Band and Toy Band are cousins.

Old Band

Gilbert: Was known as Fredbear in his youth, but now he's the running the company after his father retired. Mid or late 30s.

Sebastian: Was known as Springbonnie in his youth, but now he helps his brother with running the company. Mid or late 30s.

Main Band

Frederick: Freddy Fazbear, the responsible eldest. Mid or late 20s.

Bruce: Bonnie The Bunny, the fun-loving second oldest. Mid or late 20s.

Carly: Chica The Chicken, the mother figure second youngest. Mid 20s.

Flynn: Foxy The Pirate, the adventurous youngest. Mid 20s.

Toy Band

Frankie: Toy Freddy, the shy middle child. Early 20s.

Beth: Toy Bonnie, the over energetic third youngest. Early 20s.

Chole: Toy Chica, the over hyper second youngest. 18-19.

Mabel: Mangle and Funtime Foxy, the tired eldest. Mid 20s.

Andy: Marionette, the emotionless (tease) second oldest. Mid 20s.

Brian: Balloon Boy, the smol youngest and is thirteen.

Sister Location

Jessica: Baby, the cheerful eighteenth years-old.

Rosemary: Ballora, the beautiful woman and mother of Bonbon. Mid 30s.

Jason: Funtime Freddy, everyone thinks he's on crack but he's not. Early 30s.

Bonneville, or Bonbon: the daughter of Rosemary, she's five. Funtime Freddy is her favorite.

Security Guards

Michael: Night guard, is a bastard. Early 30s.

Jeremy: Day guard, is always getting unmercefully flirted with by Andy. Early 20s.

Vicker: Day guard, is a caring father. Mid 30s.

Scott: Day guard and head of security, is a nerd. Late 20s.

Vanessa: The night guard, the twin sister of Vanny, she's done with everyone's bs. She's trying her best to help Vanny heal from what happened and allows her explore around the Pizza Plex at night sometimes. Early 20s.

Vanny: The twin sister of Vanessa, she suffers from PTSD from an abusive relationship. She has met Gregory when he ran off during closing time and had Lewis running around trying to find him. His chaotic energy helped her feel a little bit better. Early 20s.

Parker (Plushtrap): The son of Sebastian, hates being dressed up as a bunny by his dad. He's ten and a prankster.

Gregory: The adopted son of Lewis, the king of chaos, eight years-old.

Glamrock Band

Lewis: Glamrock Freddy, the local himbo. Late 20s.

Clover: Glamrock Chica, the "can eat everything and gain not a single pound." Early 20s.

Jackson: Montgomery Gator, the one who needs to take a chill pill. Mid 20s.

Madeline: Roxanne Wolf, the narcissist. Mid 20s.

Arthur: Sundrop, the twin brother of Ross, the overexcited child. 19 years-old.

Ross: Moondrop, the twin brother of Arthur, the creepy kid in the corner. 19 years-old.

Simone: Dj Music Man, the guy you want to hang out with at a party. Late 30s.

Jamie: Was known as Glamrock Bonnie, he will be missed, died from a car accident. Late 20s.

#fnaf

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life-rewritten · 4 years

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Flower Of Evil: A tiptoe into more psychopathology vs normalcy

So this is not full proof that this is the next drama this blog will focus on. However, I must say that after 4 episodes I have become seduced by the storyline of Flower of Evil. Instead of analysing the mystery of the show; how Do Hyun So ended up being framed up in this mess (plus what actually happened 18 years ago with his family). I want to focus again on psychology. In fact, my observations are that it seems this year’s theme of dramas is exploring the fight to be accepted when you are seen or have something psychologically wrong with you. So what’s up with Korea wanting to show the truth of people with ASPD on screen. There has been a portrayal of people with this disorder, not wanting to be known for what they have. They want to be known for what their potential could be if treated equally, focusing on their need to be in control and rational.

Psychopathology vs Normalcy

This shows up as massive bases for these two dramas. We are introduced to Go Moon Young, in Psycho, but it’s okay and Do Hyun So in this drama Flower of Evil. I love how both titles have the juxtaposition of two concepts in them. One is Psycho, but it’s okay; being seen as Psycho means you have something wrong with your mind, so you’re not meant to be okay. On the other hand, with Flower of Evil; flowers are typically perceived as beautiful and symbolise innocence, love and positivity, so evil is not meant to be connected with these two.

These titles correlate with the feelings our characters have with how the world perceives them vs what they actually think and want to be. They crave normalcy and warmth while the world believes they should be cold and emotionless. While it’s okay to not be okay aims to give a message about how people are all normal even if they struggle with what’s wrong with them, they still deserve love and warmth.

The Diagnosis

The similarities of both our character’s quest for freedom of trauma and abuse and need to be loved:

Do Hyun So is born with ASPD, unfortunately for him, people did not have a full understanding for it and as we are shown they believed he was possessed and continued to abuse him in need to try and eradicate what was wrong with him. Already he has been outcasted by everyone and society never to really have a place to fall on unless he starts again with no one knowing who he is. Meanwhile, Moon Young is forced and groomed into having ASPD. She doesn’t have ASPD, but judged because of her actions; taught to her by her mother. When young, Moon Young was isolated, and people viewed her as a monster, not understanding why she said or did the things she did. To protect who she loves, she also chased them away by showing them an action which was seen as monstrous. (chasing Gang Tae away by killing butterflies)

The Lover

Both become obsessed with someone who brings them a new perspective of wanting to be healthy. Ji Won shows up and falls for Hyun So immediately she sees him, she’s attracted to him and fights to be liked by him. Hyun So realises that she can be used to fake normalcy with his new identity and also understands that she helps his trauma (the ghost of his dad) disappear. Quite similar Gang Tae is attracted to Moon Young for saving his life and also fights to be liked by her when younger, she also realises he’s the prince that can introduce her to new emotions. However, he runs away when she tries to chase him away. And fights to succumb to his feelings when they are reunited because of how he perceives her. Ji Won doesn’t yet know her husband has ASPD and is hiding his identity, and now she is slowly uncovering the truth. Gang Tae is exposed to Moon Young from the start and runs away once he discovers it.

Both can be cruel when they want. Hyun So is to protect the people in his life (I’m sure if he murdered before it’s because he was protecting his sister or someone he cares about and in the act of defence or anger he does it) but he also uses cruelty to prevent his secret from coming out. Moon Young uses cruelty only to teach people realism and help people overcome their trauma. She believes there’s no need to shy away from the truth.

The Parent

Both have psychopath parents who are killers with no remorse. Hyun So father is apparently a serial killer who probably forced him to watch and learn his actions. And Moon Young has a mother with ASPD that killed people to make sure they don’t take her or her daughter to the hospital. Each parent is connected to the very root of the trauma both characters suffer from.

There is a need for both not to want to end up like their parent even though the world connects them to that.

Do Hyun So, has been on the run for his life for 18 years; adopted as another family’s son. He is also married with this identity and has a kid. He is now desperate to cover up his secrets and make sure no one finds out the truth. Moon Young also rewrote her life becoming famous, actively declaring her self as an orphan despite both her parents being alive, and accepted her fate to be alone and continue being emotionless/monster people viewed her as. Her wealth is protected by her being a well-renowned fairy-tale author. Again both of them have sought different transformations to escape their past while trying to be normal for the sake of it. Do Hyun So actively conceals his identity while Moon Young embraces parts of hers and works hard to erase her connection to her parents.

The Trauma

However, both have traumatic PTSD visions from their past. Do Hyun So starts seeing his father appear in front of him each time he’s angry or prone to react, and he becomes frightened and terrified. Moon Young has sleep paralysis because of nightmares of her mother pinning her to the bed and telling her she’ll kill anyone she lets into her life. Gang Tae provides Moon Young, a sleeping doll to take away her nightmares, and being with him teaches her to want to let go of her trauma. Ji Won also provides refuge for Hyun So because she makes his father’s vision disappear. Again the idea of love providing this place for them to feel safe and secure in becomes a theme as well in the show. Both have to stop trying to be in control in other to get healing, and right now Hyun So is breaking all his efforts little by little and its causing him to spiral. However the saying the truth will set you free is real, once his wife can see past his disorder and past, they both will help him get his name cleared and also maybe have a relationship that is based on their authentic selves being exposed.

The Mask

Flower of evil takes a different turn though as we try to uncover this murder case and who is framing Do Hyun So, it becomes apparent that Hyun So isn’t the psychopath killer people have labelled him as because of his ASPD. Instead, he tries hard to wear a mask where he practises fake smiles, fake emotions and counterfeit feelings by looking at cue cards that show those very same emotions. This is similar to the cue cards, Moon Young is shown by Gang Tae when he thought she didn’t understand feelings. These are used for his brother as well with autism.) The theme of PBIO was the unravelling of the masks and embracing the real person. I wonder if Flower of evil will continue on with that theme. So far, I am intrigued by the show.

The Truth

I believe that just as Moon Young, the reason why Hyun So is so desperate to control the narrative is that he knows people will keep labelling him because of his ASPD as a monster. No one will believe his truth or the reveal of his story of what happened in the past. No one would be able to vouch for him because they all thought he was crazy, and he also had a parent who was an actual serial killer, it makes it even harder to believe him. He instead retains this façade, though you see him show a little bit of hurt/resentment in episode 4 when Ji Won mentions his ASPD and uses it to connect his reasons for murder and her sheer belief that he is the murder suspect everyone is looking for. He isn’t happy but resigns himself to the fact that it will always be this way. What I think he doesn’t know is that his wife won’t be that way I predict, she’ll panic at first, but like she said at the beginning of episode 1 when she kisses him underwater, she will continue to love him unconditionally no matter what. So she will be the key to unveiling the real truth hopefully.

#flower of evil #psycho but it's okay #It's okay to not be okay #kdrama #kdramanet #analysis #lee joon ki #lee joon gi #moon chae won #fvete

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tunasama13 · 3 years

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OKAY OKAY I GOT BACK INTO PLAYING MY OLD POKEMON GAMES, and *sighhhhh* holy fuCK-

Pokemon White:

- N MY BABY BOY WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE YOU AAAAAAAAA

- Bianca is a mood

- That. Fucking. Ranger. With the. Overpowered. Marcactus.

- I got into the game, tried to get my old team back together only to find that besides my starter, EVERYONE WAS UNDERLEVELED AS FUCK

- Did I mention how much I want to punt Ghetsis into the Distortion World? Giratina needs some dinner.

- (Not me headcanon N to be a half Zoroark AND biologically related to Lusamine, Lillie, and Gladion from his bio mothers side)

- NOT ME GETTING WAR FLASHBACKS IN VICTORY ROAD

- Elesa my QUEEN.

- I mayyyyy or may not ship Cheren and Bianca?

- Alder is N’s adopted dad now, FUCKING BATTLE ME.

- My game card was all fucked up because of my shitty DSi with an eternally dusty cartridge and me trying to scratch out the nonexistent dirt.

- Okay okay, TELL ME HOW I NOTICED THIS. Ghetsis= Lusamine/ N=Lillie/ The Sages= Faba x7/ Anthea and Concordia= Wicke(?) (sorry Gladion my baby 🥺)

- I will keep making connections to Team Plasma and the Aether Foundation until the day I die.

- ALSOOOO, the Juniper’s father-daughter relationship is wholesome as fuck.

- N has a boyfriend and a girlfriend, their names are Piers and Flannery (DON’T WORRY SHE’S 19 IN MY HC, also, she’s never given a specific age, and she looks slightly over 18?)

- I laugh everytime I defeat a Team Plasma grunt

Pokemon Ultra Moon:

- LILLIE I LOVE YOU SO MUCH YOU INNOCENT LIL BEAN

- GLADION, MY EMO BABY BOYYYYYY

- Lana is adorable, BUT I HAVE TO TRADE A FUCKING EMOLGA TO MYSELF TO DEFEAT THAT DAMN TOTEM ARAQUANID.

- Lusamine is Ghetsis but she’s attractive and actually gets redempted, I STILL HATED HER FOR THE FIRST PART OF THE GAME THOUGH.

- Speaking of Lusamine, Lillie, and Gladion. I will die with my headcanon that they’re N’s biological aunt/cousins.

- Hau, YOU ANNOYING RAY OF SUNSHINE.

- Kukui and Burnet’s relationship is sooooo sweet 🥺 IF YOU TEAR THEM APART I WILL BEAT YOUR ASS

- I love how Kukui found Lillie washed up on the beach and went, “HONEY GET THE ADOPTION PAPERS”

- Nebby is baby, I would willingly adopt the scared cloud baby.

- I don’t know why, but that flying type Elite Four member pisses me off. WHATWASHERNAME???

- Guzma is a traumatized stinky gremlin, and I love that traumatized stinky gremlin.

- FABA CAN FUCKING FALL IN A DITCH AND DIE

- Ghetsis you asshole, HIT LILLIE AGAIN AND NEBBY WILL RIP YOU APART.

- Also, uhhhhhh, Ghetsis just threatened to murder his “sons” cousin.

- Wicke? More like, THICKE

- Oh yeah, my dumbass made my Pokemon player character Lillie and Gladion’s younger sister, SUCH A DUMBASS I AM.

- Nanu, Acerola. Stop giving me Killian and NBB vibes. ( @usernose )

- ALRIGHT N AND LILLIE SIMILARITIES. THREE TWO ONE GO!

1. They have mentally abusive fuckwad parents (except Lusamine got redeemed)

2. Lillie has Solgaleo/Lunala, N has Reshiram/Zekrom

3. They leave at the end of the game (in Sun and Moon and Black and White) WITH EMOTIONAL ASS PIANO THEMES

4. Obviously show signs of being abused (I’ve seen theories with N having bipolar disorder/Multiple Personality Disorder, and Lillie just has straight up PTSD in the manga.)

- Of course, in my HC, N is Lillie’s cousin, soooo...

- THE ULTRA WORMHOLE IS SOOOOOO FUN

- I have PTSD from that fucking Totem Araquanid constantly murdering my team

- Wh- Colress. WHAT.

- I felt so bad for Popplio 🥺

- The fucking contrast between the girl preschoolers and the boy preschoolers. The boys start bawling and throw temper tantrums and the girls are like, “YAY I LOST! :D”

- Gladion is baby boy, emo baby boy, protecc him.

- Illima gives me weird Aoyama vibes, and that’s okay.

#pokemon #pokemon bw #pokemon ultra sun and moon

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catrasredemption-moved · 3 years

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That whole "an abusive mother shouldn't be seen as a mother figure" sitting not well with me.

So can you elaborate on that and not make it super invalidating to people abused by foster/adoptive/psuedo paternql figures?

This feels like a trap, but sure. Buckle up, we’re going back to my childhood.

(this is long, contains emotional/mental abuse, alcohol and drug references, and is just plain unpleasant)

I was emotionally/mentally abused by my mother and stepfather for pretty much my entire life. I was an oops baby, and my bio dad at least had the self awareness to check out my life early because he knew he’d never be a good father (yes, I give him some twisted credit for that, because at least he was honest). My mom was kind of... I don’t want to say forced to keep me, but her family was very insistent. I don’t think she would have gotten an abortion anyway (put aside that this was 1991), but things might have been different if she’d just been allowed to go the same route as my father. Her parents pretty much raised me for six years, partially because she had a full-time job, and partially because she just had no clue what she was doing. And I think having her parents as a crutch for so long definitely limited her.

And then she met Paul. Twenty years older than her, didn’t even have a toaster to his name, alcoholic, drug addict. I was six, so obviously this all went over my head, but my mother’s parents did not like him (something I didn’t find out until years after they both died). My mom was 27 at the time, and I don’t know if she just thought no one else would want her because she was a single mother, if she was just desperate, or maybe she really was attracted to him, but she started dating him. I don’t remember everything that led up to the Breaking Point, because this was 23 years ago, but I remember the specific night - she was on the phone with Paul, and I kept saying I was hungry. I forget what she made, but it was something I’d eaten before and suddenly decided I didn’t like (as children do sometimes), so I was upset.

At this point my grandmother or grandfather would usually step in and just make me something else. Instead my grandfather went upstairs and told her to get off the phone and deal with it. Was I being a little bratty? Yeah, probably. Should my grandparents have just dealt with it? No, that was my mother’s job. Even if it just meant coming downstairs and making me eat the Thing. But she didn’t want to get off the phone (this was 1997, people still talked on phones. Weird, right?)

One huge fight later, my mother put me in her car and drove me 20 minutes to another city to stay with Paul and his roommate. I didn’t see my grandparents for three days. That’s when they learned they had to play nice with Paul or my mother would actually take me away.

We moved in with Paul, after they’d been dating for three whole months. My mother upended both of our lives, including making me transfer to another school after first grade, for a guy she’d been dating for three months. A guy she knew had substance abuse problems. A guy who, when home alone during the day, would sit out in the living room and watch porn (and one time watched it in my room, which? I was eight, I very vaguely remember walking into the apartment, my mother immediately grabbing me and pushing me back into the hall while saying “get that shit off her TV.”)

Some very fucked up things happened over the next twelve years, some I still haven’t told anyone about (including my wife), and some that were just wrong in retrospect. Common occurrences included (some of this might be considered lowkey sexual abuse? I’ve never thought about it that way, but my perspective is skewered af):

Telling me to turn sideways so he could see how I was “developing” (this started at 10)

Inappropriate comments about my weight and how I eat too much (starting around 8 or 9)

Wildly gross and sexual comments about my body (starting around 13)

Coming into my room while drunk and asking for a hug, then holding me for too long and lowkey groping (starting around 13 or 14)

Calling me a whiny bitch (starting around 8)

Yelling at me for eating food, especially if I finished something, because I didn’t pay for the food so why should I get to eat it all (starting around 15)

Yelling at me for daring to go out into the living room and talk to my mother while they were watching TV (pretty much the entire time I lived with them)

Telling me my mother used to have “a great body” before she got sick and lost a ton of weight (I don’t remember when exactly that started, but the sickness in question happened when I was 7)

Trying to tell me about how he and mother were getting hot and heavy while I was at school (high school; one of the only times my mother actually told him to shut the fuck up)

Enjoyed calling me stupid and calling me an idiot and other things that were entirely damaging to my self esteem

Straight up saying, after seven years of my mother insisting we were family, that I wasn’t his daughter and I never would be (13)

Inappropriate comments while drunk, to the point where I knew when he’d be drunk (because it was always pay day), and me arranging to be out of the house for a couple of days just so I wouldn’t have to be there (high school; I went to my aunt’s, and eventually she started figuring out a pattern and asking me what was going on. I was 16 when she finally realized I hate Paul as much as she does)

...to name a few things. And my mother? Knew about all of this. And sure, she tried to stick up for me once or twice, like about the food thing, but even that came with the caveat of “maybe you should stop eating so much.” (before anyone asks, yes, I’m slightly overweight, and this was some grade A body shaming). But for the most part, she enabled him. And when he told me to stop being sensitive and it was “just a joke”? She sided with him and told me to stop “whining” (whining being “trying to defend myself”). She took his side about 95% of the time, while still insisting that he was my father, because he was there and he was helping “raise” me. They’ve been together for 23 years, and she’s basically chosen him over me at this point (because I chose to get the fuck out of the house and take a job in a state 300 miles away just to escape that hell). We actually got into a huge fight about him back in June because I didn’t call to wish him a Happy Father’s Day. He has never met my wife (whom he referred to as my “friend”, and my mother saw nothing wrong with that, then got mad when I tried to say “what if I called him your roommate”), he was not invited to our wedding, and we had a fight last Christmas when I went back to visit and straight up said he wasn’t allowed to visit our hotel (because I never want him to meet my wife).

Do I consider her my mother? ...sure, in the absolute vaguest sense of the word. She made sure I made it from birth to 18, kept me clothed and fed and a roof over my head (while constantly reminding me about how much it cost to raise a kid.)

Do I consider him my father? Fuck. No. I left the house for college when I was 18, moved out when I was 22, have had three therapists, been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and probable PTSD, have gathered a small group of my own found family, and I still carry a lot of shit from that time in my life. I hate showing my body in any way, and tend to wear shirts that are, oh, 2-3 sizes too big. I hate eating “too much”, despite the fact that a) my wife doesn’t care if I finish something and b) I help pay for the fucking food. I get extremely anxious when I try to correct someone about something (like my pronouns), because I’m afraid they’re going to yell at me and tell me to stop being sensitive. My self esteem is still basically at rock bottom, to the point where I don’t believe people sometimes when they say they like my writing. I flinch when people try to touch me (that’s getting better, though).

I can’t even give him the bare minimum credit I give my mother, because he actively hindered my attempts to grow up and move on from the shit he put me through. He was, and still is, a terrible person, and the idea of him being my father makes me sick. I give more credit to by bio father (you know, the one who walked out because he knew he wouldn’t be a good father), because he’s at least made a few half-ass attempts throughout my life to show he cares (and in a way, I think he does, he just knew he wouldn’t be a good father). Paul, though? Paul could die tomorrow and I... I can’t say I wouldn’t care at all, just because he has had such a presence in my life, but I wouldn’t miss him.

If you have an abusive parental figure (be it bio/step/foster/adoptive/etc.), and you consider them your parent, then that’s you, and I don’t judge. But Paul, no matter what my mother says, will never be my father in any way. He actively made me afraid to exist or be in my own home. He left scars so deep that I don’t think I’ll ever totally move on from some of it. I need people to remind me that nothing he did was okay or normal, and that my mother wasn’t right for allowing it.

So basically, I have a lot of experience to back up why I don’t think abusive parents should be considered parental figures. Parents are supposed to help you grow and care about you and want you to succeed. Paul did none of those things. He continues to be an active roadblock in my life, as a matter of fact. And I refuse to feel bad about not considering him a parental figure.

#Mystery Person #Sam Answers

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uwuwriting · 3 years

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My OCs

Okay okay so these are my OCs, I’m sorry if their names aren’t really Japanese I googled most of their names back when I started creating them. I hope you enjoy them and well let's get started. I didn’t include Sky aka Shirakumos daughter even though technically she is one of my OCs, I felt that since I have introduced her in my fics *by name* I’ll leave her a rather blank slate for yall *I can describe her as well if yall want that though*. Hope you like them and yes some of the quirks were inspired by Avatar. Love ya💖💖💖

Kenushima Akane

Akane is in her mid 20s, her birthday is on 30th of December making her a Capricorn and is part of our favorite villain group, the LoV. She was the eldest child of two pro heroes who married because it would satisfy the media and boost their careers. She had two younger siblings, the twins Annya and Arakan. She is around 5’7 (170cm) with fairly long auburn hair which are always braided so they don’t get in her way, amber eyes and a burn mark on her right shoulder from a small scuffle with our favorite fire user. Her hair and eyes become a dark red when she uses her quirk making her even more menacing. She wears a black mask over her eyes, keeping that way her identity a secret and a rather tight uniform consisting of black leather overall-shorts matched with a black-red plaid shirt and thigh highs with black military boots. Her weapon of choice is anything you can swing. Her quirk is a powerful blood bending type which she inherited from her mothers’ side. She can control the blood in someones’ system to the point of a heart attack or a stroke. Once the blood is out of the persons’ system she can still wield it, sharpening it into a blade like shape and cut through both flesh and bone, the new blood adding to the power of her makeshift blade. Her limits begin when she gets a nose bleed followed by either her eyes or ears starting to bleed as well; the final stage is giving herself a heart attack but she has never reached that point thankfully. It’s a self-destructive quirk since she pushes her body’s boundaries everytime she activates it, making her vulnerable to diseases after a particularly hard fight. She is a master of many forms of martial arts, kicking anyone's ass without even having to use her quirk. Her family is wreck *lmao*. Since her parents married out of convenience the kids were results of moments of weakness between the two adults. Her household wasn’t very affectionate, partnered with her fathers’ constant absence and negligence and her mothers overly obsessive quirk demands, her relationships soon turned abusive. Excessive training and brutal punishments were her mothers’ tactics to ensure a picture perfect quirk state which she could boast about in the media. Her father was a decent figure during the sparse moments when he was actually in the house. He treated his kids with some trace of humanity and not like objects but he too didn’t really care. Everything went downhill when rumours of affairs surfaced and her mother lost her senses, killing their father on the kitchen floor before getting to the children. Akane tried to protect her siblings but was easily tossed aside by her mother and she doesn’t remember what actually happened that night. The only thing she knows for sure is that she was now an orphan and one sibling short, losing both her home and her brother that night. She didn’t stay in foster care for long since she dipped, joining a group of castaways called the Deck. Due to her quirk she was named the Queen of Hearts and became one of the most feared and powerful villains in Japan. Soon she joined the LoV after Shiggy approached her, officially meeting Dabi *who is her s/o btw lol*. She’s still close with her little sister Annya and owns a bookstore so she won’t have to steal. She has morals *shocker*, killing only those who have comitted crimes varying from abuse to murder or fraud. She is against useless killing and would prefer to clear the streets from scum rather than litter it with herself. She’s kinda like an anti-hero. She joined the LoV so she could have easier access to the insights of the hero industry and slowly help take out those hero frauds. She likes cooking Mexican food, her favorite animal is the fox and she is deathly afraid of spiders to the point she once burned her table using a lighter and hairspray because she had seen a spider on it. All in all she is a lovely person *I think*.

Kenushima Annya

Annya is 15 and part of class 1-A, her birthday is on the 3rd of January *like me heh* making her a Capricorn. She is the youngest of a twin set and has an older sister, while her parents were pros. She is around 5’7 (170cm) with shoulder length dark brown hair, amber eyes and faint lightning like scars scaling down both of her arms. Dark lavender streaks appear in her hair when she over uses her quirk and her scars shine the same color many times pulsating along with the surges of her blasts. Her uniform consists of a tight black crop top with azure and magenta details alongside black pants, black boots which are specially designed to give her extreme jumping power helping her also levitate for a short period so she can unleash her attacks and lastly gloves that cover almost all of her scars *also black with the same patterns as the top*. Has basic combat skills but she mostly prefers to rely on her quirk. Speaking of her quirk, she has a combo of a water and a lightning quirk making her able to easily electrocute others without short circuiting like Kami. She can control any form of water, making her easily overpowered in seaside missions but she can also control any liquid which has some water in it. However she cannot create water from thin air, like Shoto can make ice, and she can’t freeze it. Much like her sister she uses water mostly as a whip or a blade. Lightning is used mainly as one of her ultimate moves since she doesn’t have full control over it and it tends to hurt her scars when she does use it. She can let the purple strings of light course through her and hit her target with incredible force making her excellent for range attacks. Just like her sister she reaches her limits when her nose starts to bleed and she can pass out from dehydration due to her quirk using up some of the water inside of her body with each attack. Now for her family life. She was a late bloomer and that was unacceptable according to her mother. She didn’t showcase signs of having a quirk until the age of 9 when her mother attacked her and her siblings. In a fit of rage and despair her mother tried killing her for ruining the familys’ image with her quirklessness. Her twin brother tried to save her from her mother *just like Akane did* only to be tossed aside as well, hitting the back of his head on a nearby table. Seeing both of her siblings on the ground *and almost being choked to death by her abuser* Annya activated her quirk, losing complete control over her powers resulting in her scars and the death of her mother. Arakan was pronounced dead on arrival leaving the two girls the only surviving members of the Kenushima family. After Akane’s disappearance, Annya was moved from home to home for about a year before being adopted by a couple and living as much of a normal life as she could. Her mental health isn’t the best as one can imagine, suffering from PTSD from the incident and having self hating tendencies. Becoming a hero is her way of proving to herself that she’s not a monster and that she can indeed help others. In class 1-A she tends to hang out with the Dekusquad and two other girls who I’ll introduce down the line. Her hero name is Electra and her s/o is Shoto *lol siblings are dating siblings tf*. She likes Autumn and Winter, loves going ice skating, has many plants in her room and loves watching horror movies with her friends.

Aizawa Kaiya

Kaiya is 15 and part of class 1-A despite her father being the homeroom teacher. Her birthday is on the 19th of June making her a Gemini. She sports the legendary jet black hair, her hair is also pretty long so she always has to braid it or put it up in a ponytail and she has egirl bangs *I don’t know how else to describe them*. Her eyes are a striking azure and she has dyed the tips of her hair the same color. Ya girl is shorter than the Kenushimas, barely reaching 5’2 (160cm). Her hero costume consists of black cargo pants with multiple pockets, a black turtleneck and chest straps(?) around her waist and collarbone finishing the look with black military boots. Sometimes she might wear a gas mask which helps her control her breathing. Now for her quirk. It’s some type of psychic power, she can hear people’s thoughts making it easy for her to know what they are about to do, giving her the upper hand almost every time, but she can aslo channel her own and others thoughts and make dark shards out of them. These shards can be thrown with amazing speed or create a protective wall in front and above her. Her quirk ,though drains her very easily, making it hard to breath and walk in a straight line. She gets light headed while the voices inside her head get overly loud. Through practice she can push her boundaries and use more of her quirks’ power. Lastly in order for her to hear your thoughts she needs to see you. Once she sees you for even a quarter of a second, she can see into your head even long after you have left her line of sight. Her family life is very calm compared to the Kenushimas. She is the daughter of Aizawa’s sister who vanished when Kaiya was five. Having no one else to care for her since her real father wasn’t in the picture, Aizawa took his niece in and raised her as his own. She was too little to remember her mother and for years she believed that Shouta was her actual dad but Dadzawa did tell her the truth. Nothing really changed, she still calls him dad and they have a lovely father-daughter relationship. She loves Eri and loves being her older sister, playing with her, doing her hair and taking her to the dorms to meet her friends. She has a pet cat named Majesty who she uses to bribe Aizawa to buy snacks. She likes rainy days, beating Shinsou’s ass during training, being pinned by Shinsou while training, Halloween, cats and fluffy blankets. She is friends with mostly Annya, Shinsou and Sky but she doesn’t mind hanging out with the Deku or the Baku squads. Her hero name is Calypso. Her s/o is Shinsou much to Aizawa’s dismay. He is salty because this happened right under his nose, Dadzawa was too busy looking out for the 1-A boys that he completely ignored his trainee pinning his daughter down during training *he is really glad that she likes Shinsou bc he knows that he is a good kid*.

TAG TEAM AY:

@the-arcana-fan-fic @angelwritings @axerrri @reinyrei @bemorefiction @dnarez @dark-thoughts-and-red-roses @threeamwriting @ezoyscorner @letscheereachotheron @wolfkid22

#bnha #bnha oc #my oc #oc #since i cant draw #take these poorly written descriptions #im sorry #i tried #why are clothing so hard to write?#bnha x oc #dabi x oc #shoto x oc #todoroki x oc #shinsou x oc

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surveys-at-your-service · 3 years

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Survey #433

“i really wish that you could help, but my head is like a carousel: i’m going ‘round in circles”

Would you rather visit Rome or Spain? Rome. Do you really care what’s going on in celebrities' lives? Depends on the person. If I have a big interest in them, like Mark, then yes, because I care about that person and want to know they're well. Have you ever broke a plate/bowl? Accidentally. Has anyone ever drunk called/texted you? I don't think so. Can you do a backwards London bridges? Hell no, I'd bust my ass and spine. Are any of your pets “overweight”? Why the quotations? But anyway, no. Has anyone ever bought you a ring? Yeah. What has been the most traumatic experience of your life? Does it still bother you? The breakup with my first real bf. And well yeah, it resulted in PTSD. It sounds so overdramatic, I know, but I'm not even remotely exaggerating. Live a day in my head and tell me it's not actual trauma. If you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today? God no, not right now. I am not in a position to be married right now. Think back to your most important relationship, was it all your fault it��s over? My damaged side wants to say yes, but I know to be realistic, we both failed in unique areas. He didn't communicate, and I just put too much weight on him. What was your first alcoholic drink? A Mike's Hard Lemonade. What were the first lessons you ever took? Ummm I want to say choir? Did you ever go to a mental hospital? Multiple times. Do you believe that weed should be legalized? Yes. Have you ever had a significant other with a mental disorder? Yes. If you could transform into something, what would that something be? Uhhh idk. Maybe a cat? Out of 10, (10 being really shy) how shy are you? Oh, easily a 10. When was the first moment you discovered love? I actually don't really know the moment I realized I was in love w/ Jason. It was a gradual thing, so no one occasion stands out. What’s the best mistake you’ve ever made? Well, I suppose accepting Jason's Facebook friend request because I thought he was a different Jason. I can't think of many good mistakes I've made... Even the one I mentioned, it's debatable how good that one was. I really do wonder how different my life would be if I declined it. What do you think of frogs? I love frogs! They're so cute and derpy. :') Who did you last worry about and why? My cat, because he was apparently hiding somewhere and Mom couldn't find him. Who did you last feel sorry for and why? Sara, because of health stuff she's dealing with. Is there a name that you can’t stand but it’s the name of a loved one? It sucks, I feel like this burning in my stomach a lot of the time when I hear "Ashley" because that was Jason's girlfriend after me. But I have a sister with the same name. Are you currently looking for a new place to live? I'm not, and I don't think Mom actively is, though we both want to move. When did you last make up a baby’s bottle? I don't think I ever have. Well... maybe once? idr Do you believe there’s a devil? No. Have you ever felt an earthquake? No. Have you ever been on an island? Yes, actually. Did you watch the last presidential inauguration? I've never watched one. Have you ever been a fan of The Killers? I don't consider myself a true "fan," no. I only like two songs that I know. Do you have your own lighter (why or why not)? No, because I don't need one? Do you believe in miracles (why or why not)? No. I just don't. Everything has the have a cause and reason. How often do you sleep naked? Never. Are you looking forward to your prom? If you already went, how was it? I went twice, and it was fun. I especially loved having the pictures taken that I regret wiping from the face of the earth. Prom itself was pretty bland each time, like you can't hear shit and they just play awful music, but still. I was a teenager with a very fairytale outlook on love and wanted to just feel like I was in one I guess. Do you prefer Quizno's or Subway and why? I don't think I've ever tried Quizno's, actually. What’s one of your best memories from during a rain storm? I don't know. Why did you need your most recent x-ray and what were the results? It was to see if I broke my foot, I think? If that's the one, then no. I also had my legs x-rayed at some point to see if they could find any damage there because of my extreme weakness in them, but there wasn't. Do people more often mistake you as being younger or older than you are? I actually don't know. Have you ever made out with someone you weren’t dating? No. Do you know anybody who was abused? Yes. Have you ever touched an elephant? No. How many siblings do you have? I have five I "count," but I do have another half-sister on my dad's side that I don't know. I want to, but yeah... it just hasn't happened. Do you get bored of your girlfriend/boyfriend easily? I've never gotten bored of any s/o I've had. Who do you want for president? I voted for Biden. Do you think abortions are horrible? No. Forcing someone to undergo what can easily be considered a traumatic experience is horrible. Do you enjoy drama? Ugh, no. Have you ever had a guinea pig for a pet? I've had a few. Were you/are you popular in school? No. I was very much under the radar and mostly stuck to myself and a small group of friends. What brand clothing do you wear the most? No clue. Have you ever studied any new age or occult religions such as Wicca? Yes, actually, when I was leaning towards Neo-Paganism. I did research into some of its branches, such as Wicca. Are you a wrestling fan? Not at all. I honestly think it's dumb. What’s the longest movie you’ve ever watched? I want to say Troy? It never felt THAT long to me though because I love it. Have you ever been on a subway? No. Do you think spending a ridiculously large amount of money on one designer item is stupid? It sure as hell isn't for me; I lean towards people can spend their hard-earned money on whatever they want, BUT I do feel that they could still spend their money on more important things. Do you find baths relaxing? No, they gross me out. Do you have any hats? I probably still have the hat Dad got me at a Carolina Hurricanes hockey game somewhere, but idk where. Has any part of your house ever been flooded? Not on the interior, no. Have you ever been interested in learning about murderers or murder cases? Not especially. Is there anyone that you’re worried about right now? Who and why? I'm just about praying Sara's new med for her POTS helps. I think me worrying how Jason is doing after his mother's death is gonna be a permanent fixture in the back of my head... If you won a lot of money, would you donate any of it? To what organization would you donate it? Oh, absolutely. I'd have to do some research first, but the Trevor Project comes to mind immediately, as well as ones that protect wildlife, help the mentally ill, fight cancer... Are you a competitive person? What are you most competitive about? Not really, no. I have my areas where I'm more likely to feel it than others, but it's generally mild. I'm not too sure what I'm most competitive about, but maybe outdoing other hunters in WoW since that's my main class that I've played religiously for years. Have you ever adopted a stray animal? Yes. What do you appreciate most about your parent(s)? The fact they somehow still support me even though I'm like... this. I feel like I should've exhausted their faith by now. Do you believe America should legalize drugs? If you think they should legalize only some drugs, which drugs do you think they should legalize? I only support the legalization of weed. What is your biggest turn-off of a person (besides physically)? Arrogance, probably. Or being aggressive/explosive. What song cover do you like better than the original? "Sound of Silence" by Disturbed, for one. That one's easy. If you could find one long-lost friend of the past, who would it be? Megan. I want her to know I forgive her and miss her friendship. What holiday do you enjoy the most? Christmas. (: Were you born in the state you live in? Yep. Have you ever lived in a house that has been broken into? No, but almost. Who do you know that watches the most sports? Probably my dad? Idk. Do you like South Park? Not really. Are you good at bowling? No. Made out for more than 3 minutes? Three minutes is nothin' lmao. Have you ever gone snorkeling or scuba diving? If yes, what’s the coolest thing you’ve seen? No, but I'd love to. What’s your favorite filling in chocolates? Caramel. What do you remember from sex ed class when you were younger? Abstinence was the only option. Heteronormativity. What’s the first instrument you ever played? Ha, a recorder back in elementary school. Have you ever had a friend break up with a bf/gf for you? Essentially. We didn't date, but that's why he broke up with her, because he wanted me instead. Do you see a bright light at the end of your tunnel? I don't like thinking about this. I can only hope there is, but I doubt it a lot. Have you ever waited in line overnight for something? No. Is there such a thing as being too rich or too poor? "Too poor" is very obviously a thing??? "Too rich" is more complicated to me, as I can see both sides to it. Like it's your hard-earned money, but at the same time, is it really necessary at a certain point? Like start donating regularly or something. Do something good. Do you think having an expensive phone is a good investment? Depends on how expensive, I suppose, and what you use it for. What’s your largest bill? Electric, gas, phone, etc. I don't have any of my own bills. It's embarrassing by this age. Do you like your job? I'd like to even have a job... What is your favorite song and why? "False Flags" by Massive Attack, because it's so poetically haunting in its message of how fucked up politics are. Its monotonous tone also adds another layer of sadness to it, like a reminder of how "normal" and bland and unsurprising everything is, no matter how horrible... I could honestly probably write an essay on how I interpret the song, especially if you add in the incredible symbolism of such a simplistic music video. Are you introverted or extroverted? I am very introverted. If you’re married and your spouse cheated on you, would you forgive them? Nope, byeeeee~ Who knows the real you the most? Sara, really. How old is the oldest person you’ve had sexual relations with? He'd be 27 now. Have you been upset the past few days? My PTSD has been kinda vicious the past couple days, especially today. Then earlier at my nephew's b-day party I had to nearly bite my fucking tongue off with that family's political bullshit. My anger really flared up a few times hearing despicable shit, but I think I concealed it fine by just not saying a word. What’s the craziest thing you’ve ever thought of doing for a job? Nothing "crazy," really... Who was your first celebrity crush? Jesse McCartney had my young heart, ha ha. When did you last see or speak to someone you dislike? Why do you dislike this person? Today, at my nephew's aforementioned b-day party. I in specific don't like my sister's husband because he's sexist, racist, homophobic, bigoted... I could go on and on. We don't just have "different opinions," we have different morals entirely. When you listen to music, do you generally sing along, or just listen? I almost always just listen. I don't sing a lot. Can you remember the last time you felt emotional? What was the reason? Today. PTSD is a bitch. What if you were told that your life has to stay exactly as it is right now, and nothing will ever change? How would you feel about that? Quite honestly, I don't think I would want to live anymore. Have you ever been to the hospital for something really serious? I'd consider an OD on cold medicine to be serious, but then again, I experienced almost no effects from it. Idk if I just got fluids fast enough or what, but whatever it was, I'm thankful for. Are you excited for winter? UGGGHHHH BRING IT ONNNNNNN. Have you ever had a moment with someone you like that seemed like a movie moment? Many. What are you listening to right now? "Down In The Park" by Marilyn Manson. What’s your favourite flavour of iced tea? Tea is gross. Have you ever been to a casino? If so, which one(s)? No. Have you ever visited a sex shop? I haven't. Have you ever ridden a bicycle through a busy city? NOOOOOOOO. I could never do that. What’s your favourite place to get pizza? Literally Domino's, lmao. I am so basic. Do you have a lock number or pattern for your phone? No. There sure isn't anything important on it. What’s the most number of people you’ve ever lived with? Five.

#survey #surveys #random questions #lyrics: ''happy song'' by bring me the horizon

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