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#I mentioned this in paragraph one but I'll say it again: there is no such thing as a right myth

forestofsprites · 2 years

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Orpheus and Eurydice

There are some very Orpheus and Eurydice themes in the narrative of Ed and Stede that do indeed make me feel many things. For the record, I'm using one specific take on the myth here (specifically not the one in Symposium), but as is standard for myths, there are many different opinions on the nuances- this is merely one of them.

First and foremost, we need death. Stede endures this in a more literal sense- legally, he is now dead. An act of devotion, perhaps, as he seeks to cultivate a fresh start with his love. Equally, however, Ed himself undergoes a death. Not only does he gift Stede a disordered burial at sea, but he invokes one for himself, too. In episode ten, he lets the red silk representing his heart sail steadfast across the ocean. Anyone who's familiar with the ending of Orpheus' life will know that upon his death, his head and dutiful lyre were sent floating down the Hebrus River, straight out to sea. While Ed is alive both literally and legally, he sacrificed his heart- washed to the ocean much like Orpheus himself.

Next up, we travel to the crux of the myth. The quintessential theme of mournful love. The deep and burning sort, the kind that drives you to the underworld in an attempt to rectify what was so tragically lost. In OFMD we need to backtrack to episode nine, to Edward and his act of grace declaration; a show of all he'd lose, all he would risk, to keep his love safe. He accepts the journey, perils and all! Stede mirrors this in episode ten by not simply closing the door on his past, but by going so far as killing himself off, playing with death, in order to truly live life alongside his love. Much like Orpheus, this poignantly speaks to the boundaries that need to be crossed- both that metaphorical death and journey, but also the literal treck he'll be undertaking as he pursues his lost love.

Orpheus finds himself underground because of this simple, grief-driven hope that death cannot be final- it must be negotiable. He brings his lyre, performing a most dismal tune, and the gods presiding over the Underworld are so utterly moved by his performance that a glimmer of hope is provided. Go on then, find Eurydice, but here is your caveat: have trust, have faith, know that she is there and do not allow your eyes to wander. It's the backbone of all relationships epitomized to the highest stakes. You need to trust in yourself that your partner will be there, to have that faith that when you make it to the Overworld, they'll be right behind you.

For Ed and Stede, this is episode nine. Edward returns from the Underworld, preparing for a new life- for them to enter the Overworld together- but his love is not there. This doesn't follow the myth's narrative to a T- but it does bring us back to the idea of trust and faith- both in your partner and moreso, in yourself. It's the nagging fear that this is too good to be true- that the excitement can snap back to grave reality in a heartbeat. Both Edward and Orpheus turn around with buoyant hope, and in doing so, they are instead faced with their worst fear.

(One possible reading of the myth could be that in season two, Stede will be making his journey to the Underworld, seeking out his lost love. All the while, Ed has already made his trip downstairs, lost his love, and had his heart utterly grief-stricken in the process. There are so many ways to slice up this myth, but the themes are wonderfully applicable!)

#check the tags for more rambling about this myth #OKAY THIS IS A LOT #AND WE CAN MAKE ARGUMENTS FOR BOTH ED AND STEDE BEING BOTH ORPHEUS AND EURYDICE #BUT THAT'S THE WHOLE POINT!! I'M GOING FOR THEMES AND NARRATIVE HERE- NOT KIN-ASSIGNING CHARACTERS TO GREEK MYTH #I'LL BE RIGHT BACK BECAUSE I HAVE MUCH MORE TO SAY HANG TIGHT FOLKS #our flag means death #ofmd meta #orpheus and eurydice #ofmd #rambling #our flag means death meta #I mentioned this in paragraph one but I'll say it again: there is no such thing as a right myth #myths are wonderful because they change with time and society- one original myth can offshoot into 500 variations and none is less or more #valid than the other. One may be more original- might date earlier- but at the end of the day they are myths and they are unique to #their time period and culture! I go with perhaps the classic telling of Orpheus and Eurydice- but Plato's edition spins it in another light #and so on and so forth!#You can very basically break it into two camps: Orpheus did it out of love versus Orpheus did all this and it proved he didn't truly #love her. The gods were playing a trick and we all laughed except Eurydice who was very dead. Their #argument there is a very classical Greek perspective of: if you loved them and they died- the solution is to kill yourself to join them #by trying to bring them back to life you are making a mockery of both death and the gods. etc etc etc #and that theme could be applied to Ed and Stede too!!

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iveriee · 8 months

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★;CATEGORY: A yandere x Reader

★;PAIRING: Yan!Tom Riddle x Gn!Reader.

★;SUMMARY: In which, he gets utterly envious of your s/o.

★;PS: This contains severe mentions of abusive and obsessive behaviours, Henceforth if you are uncomfortable with any of such topics, Please do not read this. I do not encourage toxic behaviour and this is only a work of fiction. I'm aware that I should be writing Part 3 of the Yule Ball fic, However, I've decided not to continue it. I deeply apologize, i just did not have any ideas on how to continue it. However, if you have any sort of suggestions, please let me know. I'll write anything as long as it's relevant and appropriate. I understand the anxiety of requesting a scenario at times, I quite literally am terrified of doing so myself.

★;EXTRA QUESTION: What's your favorite Taylor Swift song and why?

To say your life was mundane would be an understatement—Boredom filled your senses, even if it was Hogwarts you were attending. But perhaps, the truthful reason was that you did not share any classes with s/o/n. Your state was truly pitiable, Words engraved on pages were mere symbols to you—Questions, Paragraphs,Instructions, Incantations, etc all demolished right out of your mind like a prompt broom. The ending of classes were one of the only things that brought you joy. On a fretful Tuesday, you hurried out of the dungeon, sprinting profusely, eventually concluding by frisking right on s/o/n, legs enclosed on their waist.

"[Name]?" They questioned, astonished by your actions.

"I really missed you..." You murmured in response. "I wish we had classes together. I don't particularly enjoy studying anymore.."

Their expression configured into a frown. "[Name], you know you have to study. I don't want you to fail." Their hands found the route to your hair, fondling it dotingly(which, of course, made you grin) only to place you back on the ground.. "Please. I only want what's best for you." They added delicately.

However, you were not even aware of the most crucial thing. In the midst of your affections with s/o/n, You had been utterly and completely examined by none other than Tom Riddle. His envy and infatuation had been rooted extensively, like a coping plant—growing and growing until it surpasses the garden, destroying it in the process. He had harboured a bitter hatred towards s/o/n, so much so it turned into desires of murder. Why couldn't you comprehend how much he was better than them? He was the ideal student...with precisely placed dark curls, a charismatic (albeit untrue) smile, excellent grades, beloved by everyone..And so in many's eyes, even flawless...could it perhaps be that you were aware of his true nature? No. It simply was not decipherable. You could not have been aware. However, he should focus on you at this moment...he told himself..(or perhaps reassured?)... He could have perhaps done anything for you, anything to please you,whether it was unjust or not, yet this was what he received in turn? Perhaps he should have tortured you until you submitted. But then again, he could not watch you sobbing.

So, henceforth, it all led to you weeping nevertheless. The exception being that it was over s/o/n's corpse, not wounded, not varnished but frigid. Cold. Their eyes were vacant, no longer were they gazing at you gently. And they never would.Never again would you sprint to them after class and embrace them.... s/o/n was dead. And tears crowded your eyes, plummeting down your cheeks. How could somebody be so vicious? How could somebody use the killing curse on them without a second thought? Why was the world so brutal? Perhaps..you should have studied. After all, they did not wish for you to fail in your O.W.LS...

And so Riddle concealed his smirk and approached you, his ego calloused when you did not turn your gaze at him. His hand idled on your shoulders, in an almost comforting manner. "I sincerely apologise for your loss, [Last name]." He murmured, almost seductively if it weren't for your grief. Mine he wondered to himself. They are rightfully mine.

#harry potter #hp fandom #tom marvolo riddle #lord voldemort #yandere tom riddle #tom riddle #male yandere #yandere #jealousy #tom riddle x reader #yandere x reader #yandere tom riddle x reader

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moonrisecoeur · 5 months

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i am so so obsessed with overstimming leon... him begging and crying out and twisting around helplessly trying to get away from your hand/mouth etc but loving it and thanking you anyway :3 whore....

i am so so obsessed with YOU AND YOUR SEXY BRAIN

warning for cnc mention!! everything here would be consensual and talked about beforehand including the reader mentioning breaking consent. :) i'll mark the paragraph with a ♡ when it comes, you're free to skip over it but again it would be consensual!!

he loves it and hates it at the same time. he loves being under your control, crying out for you, crying in general, being nothing but a playtoy, but he dislikes the pain. i feel like he'd prefer to be edged, especially because he's good at begging and he loves being desperate for you.

obviously the first orgasm is nice, it's comfortable. the build up is also nice, you're so sweet to him, so gentle and loving he almost forgot what you warned him would happen, what he agreed to. he's foolish for agreeing to this yet he has no intentions to stop you.

he cums a little quicker than he was hoping to, but it doesn't become too much until it wears off and you're still jerking him off, rubbing your thumb against his tip, giggling like he isn't grunting and moaning harshly in pain. it's not really pain, more like discomfort, sensitivity. he tries to squirm away, but of course you have him trapped. poor thing seems so distraught.

"say thank you, sweetheart," you tell him, and even though it hurts, and he can't keep the whimpers of discomfort and ache from escaping him, he nods in acceptance.

"thank you, i- i need this- fuck- i need... uhm..." he gives up that train of thought, his hands reaching out for you. he's gotta be holding onto you during this, you're his one sense of stability.

"finish your sentences, baby," you mumble as you lean in to kiss his neck, "or are you too dumb to say anything? is that it? are you stupid and dumb because of me touch you a little too much? is that it?"

"i... n-no..."

♡ you laugh condescendingly. it's such a pretty sound, just cruel enough to make the heat in his stomach ache a little more, "awh, leon, you poor thing. if i had known touching you like this would make you a stupid thoughtless whore who can't even answer my very basic questions, i wouldn't have done it. look at you, i could do so many bad things to you... and you'd be too stupid to realize i've crossed all your boundaries..."

he can't even process the words you're saying, and if anything, he's moaning too loudly to even be able to hear you, "i- i... i can't... uhm, can i.. cum? please? please please-"

"yes, baby, cum, give me even more of your pretty cum over and over again until you have nothing left to give me..."

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heartfullofleeches · 1 year

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VA Reader pulling a harmless prank on seemingly innocent yan-

Shhh.

"Be quiet, it's ringing!" Stifling your own baited laughter, you press a finger to your lips as you hold the phone to your ear - shushing your partner in crime. Huddled together on their couch, you and your accomplice hover over their phone like two kids. about to take part in the same comedic pastime. Similar to those fictitious children you both had trouble containing your excitement for the mischief planned to unleash. You angle the speaker below your lips as the line connects.

"Hello?"

"Hello, is Y/n in today?"

The line goes dead.

"What?" You dial the number again, beginning to wonder if this was as good an idea as when it was shoved in your head. You've been in the voice acting business for a couple months now - a lifelong passion finally realized with dedication and training. Paid roles were far in between, but you had fun with what you did, and were on the road to starting an asmr channel with the assistance of a good friend. Being somewhat of a prankster, that same person suggested you prank call your job and already had a script to boot. It was a little hard to say no with the effort they put into it.

"Hello?"

You regain peace of mind as the phone clicks. Too late to go back now. Once again you relax yourself, swallowing as you breath through your nose and draw your voice from the reaches of your throat.

"Hi, I called just a minute ago? I was asking about someone who may work there?"

The line goes quiet - again. You would've suspected them to have hung up again if not for the labored breathing on the other end. Your coworker forces out a chuckle.

"I'm sorry, nobody by that name works here."

One thing you learned after spending so much time together with this particular coworker was they were a terrible liar. It's what made you glad they're the one that picked up on top of their obvious caution in fear of your safety. Others would be glad to rat out your location if it meant less time take out of their schedule. If anything, the person you were speaking to now would drop everything to help you out. Just the type of person they were.

"Are you sure? We went out the weekend and they mentioned this place while we were talking. They suddenly stopped answered my calls after chatting not stop and I'm worried about them."

You read over your notes to pass the time until they reply. Wow, your friend really thought of everything. At this point you could possibly wing things out, but they had witten heavily in-depth paragraphs detailing possible scenarios and what to say as a result. Real gushy things too. If it weren't for their goofy nature you'd start to wonder what the true motives behind this prank were.

"maybe that's for the best."

"Pardon?" Your voice falters. That certainly wasn't what you expected. They seemed abrasive from the beginning of the call, but that drop in their tone was something you've never heard from them before.

"What do you mean by that?"

Your coworker mutters something you can't quite make out. "It means take a hint. They clearly aren't interested in you if there's no explanation for their disappearance - not that you deserve one. Who the fuck do you l think you are?"

Your hand clinches around the phone hearing that subtle hiss in their voice. Your friend grips your shoulder, worry clear as day. You wanted to drop the act, but had to see this out. "Look, I just wanted to know if they were available-"

A heavy object clatters to the floor.

"Stop. Saying their name. If they won't speak to you then you're as good as dead to them, and I'll make that happen if you don't learn your place. I won't let anyone ruin what we have..."

Your friend reaches for the phone. "Maybe we should hang up-"

"If you hang up this phone I will slit your throat. Your friend can be a witness before I do the same to them. Maybe they'll get a grave. I will hang you out to bleed like the worthless pig you are and leave your body for neighbors to find. You don't deserve to go missing. A cold case is more than you'll ever be worth it you think you can take what's mine. I'll kill you. I'll kill you. I'll fucking kill yo-"

"It was just a joke!" You hang up the phone and chuck it onto the table like a hot coal. It worms back into your hold with the vibration of dozens of texts flooding in, crashing to the carpet as you recoil from the shock. Yours starts to blow up with messages too, screen still opened on their chat from when you punched in their number.

"Was that you?"

"You're doing that voice acting thing, right? You really had me fooled. Haha."

"I was messing around too. Your safety is really important to me so I panicked."

"Are you still coming into night?"

"Y/n?.... Please?"

"Hey, Answer me... I'm sorry."

"I think I cut myself picking up the glass I broke. Can you take me to a hospital? Please.."

You shove your phone in your pocket before your eyes can register the picture loading on screen. "I gotta go"

You're out the door before your friend can get out a single word. Ten minutes later, they receive a request for a window call from an unknown number. They answer it.

All that's on screen is the trail of red an empty bottle of food coloring. Your coworker holds up a peace sign off screen.

"How deep should I make that grave?"

#yandere oc #yandere imagines #yandere scenarios #yandere headcanons #yandere x reader #yandere #yandere x you #yandere insert #yandere blurb #yandere drabble #yandere x y/n

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neomujinjja · 3 months

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Bite Me

pairing: Vampire! Jay x reader

genre: imagine, drama

warnings: not edited, mentioning wanting to cry, feeling nervous, slight angst, mini argument, use of the words: hissing & snarled, insecure (or is he?) jay, the phrase 'kicked puppy', regret is brought up a lot, mention of killing people, jay's pov at the end, some long paragraphs (especially in jay's pov)

Synopsis: Your relationship with Jay has developed further, and you're sure that he's the one you want to be with for the rest of your life. Speaking of your life, you tell your vampire boyfriend to change you.

Note: This is continuation of 'Still a Monster' but this will still make a sense alone. I use underline italics for sarcasm and underline for emphasis. I wasn't expecting this ending, but the story had a mind of its own and we ended up here 😂

@kim2005bomi

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

"This was such a lovely dinner" you tell your boyfriend as he gathers up the dishes. "Thank you, Jay" you say as you gently pull him down for a kiss.

"Anything for you, baby" Jay said as the two of you separated. Today was the 5th anniversary of your relationship, still going strong despite Jay's worry that you leave after learning about his vampirism.

"I have one more gift for you". Your eyes sparkling as you thought about the surprise you had for the immortal man. He turned to look at you with his brows furrowed and a slight pout (one that he would deny having if you mentioned it).

"You didn't have to get me anything else. You've already given me a new necklace and watch".

"But I want to". Mummering under your breath, you added "it's more of gift for the both of us".

"What did you say?" Jay asked, looking up from the sink. You only smiled and shook your head in return. Taking his hands, you led the male towards the couch; similar to when you learned about his secret. Your heart was beating was fast as you grew more nervous and you were sure Jay could hear it. The vampire tighten his grip on your intertwined hands, as if to confirm that thought, before leaning in to peck your lips once again. Taking a deep breath, you decided to plainly tell him how you felt and your thought process.

"Jay," you stopped looking into his eyes and the love that you found in his made you want to burst into tears. "You're the love of my life and I want to have a forever with you. And I trust you so much which is why I want you to change me" you told him, trying to maintain eye contact but ultimately looking down to you conjoined hands. You were hoping that he felt the same way, that he wanted a forever with you the way that you did with him. Jay cleared his throat and pulled his hands away from yours. It was enough to make your desire to cry grow stronger.

"And what?! Turn you into a monster like I am?!" he hissed as he got up. "No way. There's no way I would willingly do that to you" Jay adamantly continued. He walked away, back into his kitchen and stood at his sink.

"Jay!" you cried out at his words. While you knew he was struggling with the things done in his past, you didn't think that he still saw himself as a monster. "I don't think of you that way, and I know you don't think of the rest of the boys like that" you said, walking up to him and pointing your finger into his chest. Jay snarled at the action and his fangs glimmered at you in warning. "And I know you wouldn't let me do something that I'll come to regret. So other than 𝑚̲𝑜̲𝑛̲𝑠̲𝑡̲𝑒̲𝑟̲ reasoning, what are you scared about?" you argued back, not backing down from the male, glaring into his eyes now opposite of earlier this evening. You weren't scared of Jay, he was only acting tough and trying to get you to drop the subject, he wouldn't actually hurt you.

"And that's why I'm not going to change you!" the male snapped but despite his demeanor, and proving your point, took a step back to create distance. You rolled your eyes in response as you put your hands onto your hips.

"What part of you being the love of my life, did you not hear?!"

"But that's only for now! What happens when you change your mind?" he screamed and it clicked for you why he was against the decision. He was scared, scared of being abandoned, scared of you leaving him.

"Jay, my love, did I leave when you told me a vampire?" you asked him, stopping to wait for his answer. The vampiric male only shook his head, not verbally responding to you. Jay's demeanor had changed dramatically, no longer acting aggressive. If it wasn't for the situation, you would liken him to a kicked puppy. "I've continued to stay by your side in these past five years. And I would hope that you're not, but hearing you say that makes me wonder if you're doubting the love I have for you" you continued before pausing. Turning away from the male, you let out a shaky sigh. "But either way, I wouldn't want to force you into something that you don't want to do". You walked away from Jay, heading towards the bathroom. You didn't want to leave him alone, for fear that you'd be confirming his fears, but you need a moment alone.

ꨄ︎

Jay crouched as he heard a door close, he wasn't sure where Y/N had gone. He leaned his forehead onto the cabinets, scrunching up his hands into fists. Jay banged his head on the door as the sound of muffled crying emerged from somewhere in the apartment. He hated when Y/N would cried, e̲s̲p̲e̲c̲i̲a̲l̲l̲y̲ n̲o̲w̲ when he was the reason behind it. The vampiric male understood Y/N's why, he wanted the same thing. Jay would love to have Y/N by his side for eternity, but this popped up from nowhere. He didn't want his partner to do something that they could come to regret. Jay stood up, abandoning the spot to find the room Y/N was in. Stopping at where the cries resonated from, he knocked at the bathroom door. "Babe, come out when you're ready to talk?" he told the other before walking off again. Jay sat in the couch, after the heated discussion, he wanted to give Y/N space.

ಇ

Jay turned his head around as the door screeched open. Y/N sniffled as they walked into the living room. He stood up but hesitated pulling them in a hug, despite his want to give comfort. Jay watched as they sat in the arm chair to the side, effectively creating some distance between the two of them. Y/N looked downcast, their head and shoulder curled into their chest. The human's hands gripping their elbows hidden in the jacket they were wearing. "Baby.." Jay trailed off as he stared at them, still standing in the same spot he'd froze in. The vampire cleared his throat before continuing and slowly settling onto his previous seat. "Baby, I just don't want you to regret anything. Changing means leaving a lot more behind than anything that you could gain in the immortal future. It means leaving your family, friends, the place you live; basically everything and everyone you know. I don't want for you to look at me with hatred for having changed you in 100 years" he explained to his partner. While Jay's dead heart had fluttered at the thought of Y/N being a vampire with him; he knew they didn't know everything they would be getting into. Jay stills feels guilt from killing innocent people, but he also hated watching his family age and grow from afar. It was torture, one he wouldn't wish on his worst enemy let alone his lover. "You would never be able to return to the life that you have now. Your family would mourn you with a funeral, the people who care about you will cry over your death. You'd outgrow not only your parents, but your siblings and their children. You'd never get to see them up close again; who knows if you'd ever get to see them the way you know them again. Changing you means changing every aspect of your life" Jay pointed out further to the downtrodden Y/N. They had looked up from their lap, Jay could now see how red rimmed eyes and tear-stained cheeks. They let out a whimper at the immortal's words. It was obvious they hadn't realized exactly the full extent they would be giving up in exchange for eternal life. Jay held out his hand in comfort, leaning towards the other's direction, he was surprised by the hand that overlapped his. He squeezed it as much as he possibly could without hurting Y/N. "But i̲f̲ in a year, you still want to be with me like that. Then we can talk about me biting you more, but for now think about it" the vampire let the human know. Jay knew he couldn't ignore Y/N's wishes and words either. So if they really wanted to become a vampire to continue being with him then he'd make that possible, but only after a fully informed decision.

#kpop #kpop x reader #kpop x gender neutral reader #kpop x poc reader #kpop imagines #enhypen jay park #enhypen x reader #enhypen imagines #enhypen jay #enhypen #jay park x reader #jay x reader #jay park #enhypen jay imagines

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theharlotofferelden · 24 days

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So I was checking out Greg Ellis' IMDB page to see if he's been in anything recently. I mainly wanted to know if the whole blowup between him and Mark Darrah 3 years ago that resulted in him making a YouTube video speaking in Cullen's voice while beseeching the Dragon Age fandom to rise up against Cancel Culture affected his career in any way.

This was swiftly forgotten, however, due to the fact that I got really caught up in the wall of text that is his Mini Bio.

It's a lot, right? Usually when I see bios on IMDB they're less than a paragraph. But what got me was the inclusion of all these weird details. How Greg "mastered the Rubik's cube at 12" and that he's "skydived 10,000 feet above the earth" (so? ppl skydive, man, why is this important). But then there's this mention that he has over 20 action figures of characters he's portrayed in film and television. Like... seriously? This is really worth including in your IMDB Bio? Then right at the bottom it says the Bio was written by PR which lol

Anyway, I didn't post on tumblr dot com just to dunk on all the questionable details Greg PR decided to include in his IMDB.

What I wanna talk about is this lil detail here:

Now, I've read his IMDB bio a couple times over the years and have never really questioned whether Greg was truly nominated for an Emmy. Like, who tf would lie about being nominated for an Emmy? But then I started wondering what the Emmy was for (seeing as how he neglects to mention it in his bio) so I decided to do some digging into what he was nominated for.

Doing a general google search turned up nothing so I decided to try his website to see if he supplies more details, and he does.

Again, he neglects to mention what the nomination was for, but says that he was nominated for his role on 24. So naturally I did a search for 24 Emmy nominations.

It is at this point I become aware that the Emmys have not only dedicated pages for shows that have won Emmys, but also a search function.

Guess whose name isn't listed on 24's Emmy Award page?

Guess whose name doesn't reveal any results for even something as basic as an Emmy nomination?

Even under his legal name? Or the other version of his legal name?

Okay, so maybe they just neglected to add him on the 24 page. If Greg was nominated for anything, it would most likely be under "Outstanding Supporting Actor In A Drama Series" as he was a guest actor for 9 episodes of the show (as Michael Amador) between 2003 and 2004.

He's not listed in the nominees for 2003, 2004, or even 2005 (just to be generous). And since I bothered to look it up just to double check, here's a YouTube video for every year in this category: 2003, 2004, 2005.

-------

While all this may seem like a bit much just to emphasize that Greg is lying about an Emmy nomination, I need it to be understood that I did my best trying to verify its existence. On the off chance it turns out the nomination exists somewhere, let it be known I'll delete this post and apologize for misinforming people.

But I just gotta say, if it's not on the Emmy's website or even his own Wikipedia page, then where tf is it? Like, I get that Wikipedia isn't a totally reliable source, but Gregory Itzin, who actually was nominated twice on 24 as a supporting actor, has it not only mentioned on his wikipedia page, but also has one of his nominations sourced (if you click on the link it will download a PDF).

So until proof that he was ever nominated turns up, I'm going to assume he's lying about it. Which is funny when you consider he's not even lying about winning an Emmy, he's lying about being nominated for one. He's lying about losing an Emmy. Like, could you imagine if Tommy Tallarico lied about almost being on MTV Cribs?

Anyway please reblog this post and feel free to steal it because I find this extremely funny and would love it if someone asked Greg why the internet isn't turning up results for his Totally Real Emmy Nomination.

ETA - Adding a link to @aidanchaser pointing out that it seems like Greg is claiming he was nominated under the categories for "outstanding casting in a drama series" and/or "outstanding drama series" based on what he says about the nomination on his website, along with my reply as I was aware of those nominations but didn't make the connection between them and what he says on his website.

I'm only going to add here that his claim to this nomination is a huge stretch because, by similar logic, if 24 actually won either of those nominations, basically anyone who worked on 24 could claim that they're an Emmy award winning guest actor or production designer, which entirely misrepresents the award being given as it hollistically takes into account various parts of the casting and production. Like, there's a reason there's separate categories for this stuff, and the fact that he seems so comfortable making this claim on his IMDB that he's an "Emmy nominated actor" based on those nominations is such a wild stretch.

And it's clear to me this obfuscation was intentional because he could've easily said that he worked on the "Emmy award winning show, 24" because that's more accurate to the truth of his involvement with the production (i.e. that he worked on a show that won muliple awards). But specifically claiming he was "nominated" lends credence to the notion that he was nominated specifically for his work while still technically being true (despite that claim being bullshit).

#greg ellis #greg ellis critical #dragon age #pirates of the caribbean #<- tagging because i know there's peeps in both fandoms that hates his guts and figured y'all would want a laugh at his expense #apologies if this has been pointed out during the time this post has languished in my drafts #eta - added additional context #may add more later but for now i need to stop procrastinating and get shit done lmao

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hueningchu · 9 months

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Never again.

Genre: Heeseung+Jake x Cheater!Reader

Parings: Smut, Angst, Established relationship

Song: “Unfaithful” by Rihanna

Warnings: Smut, Angst with a sort of happy ending, Mentions of cheating on partners, Established relationship, Toxic friendships and Toxic relationships, Gaslighting, Manipulation, Spanking, fingering (I apologize in advance if any of this is cringy)

Summary: After one more month of sneaking behind Heeseung’s back, You and Jake are beginning to get messy with covering it up. It all comes crumbling down when Heeseung receives a text from someone. What is the text about? Who sent it? How will they explain themselves? Who will Heeseung blame in the end?

Pt. 1

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You would like to say those hours a day you spent with Jake was not worth it but..my god it was. You did not regret a single minute that you spent with Jake. Heeseung was so sweet and so attractive but Jake was just something else to you. He made you feel good but so bad at the same time. The electricity and the heat you feel between you and Heeseung was nothing compared to how you feel with Jake. People say girlfriends are supposed to have butterflies of excitement when their significant other walks in the room. However, when yours walks in the room you feel guilt and nervous butterflies. Nervousness that at literally any moment Heeseung can ask you..

"So you and Jake have been getting along pretty well?" Hee asked with his back turned to you while he stirred his drink. Distracted by your phone, you almost missed the question, so he cleared his throat and repeated it. "You and Jake have became good friends, no?"

Getting asked that so out of the blue made your voice a tiny bit shaky but you were hoping Heeseung did not notice that."J-jake? Oh! Yeah he's uh..really cool. That's probably why he's your best friend huh?" You tried to give a normal answer that wouldn't sound suspicious but that sort of failed.

"Why is your voice so shaky? Geez, I'm only asking a question." He giggled and flashed you a smile. His sweet smile was a sign that you were off the hook. "But really quick.." Hee got up and walked into the bedroom to fetch his phone that was charging. "I got this text today." When he walked past the couch, He tossed the phone to you so you could read over the text. "Take a look at it. It'll make you laugh." Heeseung giggled again before walking back in the kitchen.

You felt your heart stop the minute you saw the contact name of the person who the text was from. It was a very long paragraph to Heeseung, from none other than...Jake.

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Jake: Hey r you up?

Heeseung: It's like 3 in the morning.

Jake: You answered tho..

Heeseung: Well no shit. I'm awake

Heeseung: I'm just pointing out that it's late as hell and you're texting me

Jake: when has this ever been a problem in our friendship?? You used to text me at 5am to get ready for school together😭

Jake: Don't think I forgot lmao

Heeseung: Shut up

Heeseung: what did you text me about tho?

Jake: oh yeah

Jake: It's kind of a lot so like should I tell you in person?

Heeseung: why did you even text me if you weren't gonna tell me until later..

Jake: I'm sorry

Jake: I feel really bad about it. So I guess I'm avoiding the topic..

Jake: I'll just tell you now then

Heeseung: Are you trying to make me nervous or sum??

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The next text Jake sent to Heeseung was the last of the chats for that conversation. It was a lengthy paragraph explaining how you and him have been together without Heeseung knowing. You could start clapping on the spot because of how good of a show Jake put on. God, he acted like such a quiet and innocent little boy in front of Hee but if only his best friend knew the things jake would do while he kept Heeseung completely oblivious. All of those little moments you had with Jake were coming back.

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"Yo. Wanna ride with me to go get snacks. When I come back the three of us can go." Heeseung said to Jake as he grabbed his keys out the dish near the front door. "Y/n is still getting ready so by the time I get back she should be ready to go."

"Nah, I'll stay here and keep y/n company. I don't mind keeping an eye out for her." Jake smiled at his bestie before Heeseung quickly left out the door. "Hey, y/n!" Jake yelled out for you as he hopped off the couch to walk into you and Heeseung's shared bedroom, where you were currently getting ready. "Hey." He poked his head in the doorway and smirked at you.

"Hey?? Did Hee come back already? You guys ready to go?" You we're sitting on the bed, putting on lipgloss and adding the finishing touches on your makeup.

"He actually just left. I wanted to come see what you were up to. Maybe we have some time to fool around a bit." The sneaky boy started to walk over to you and smiled. "You look so sexy with all that makeup on." Jake leaned down and went in to kiss you.

"Are you crazy? He could walk in at any minute. Besides, I just finished my makeup!"

Jake grabbed your chin. "Come on. I didn't say we had to screw or anything. Let's just.." he shrugged and sat down next to you. "Makeout or something before he gets back."

When he tried to kiss you on your freshly made lips again you moved back and rest your elbows on the bed. "Stop it! It's obvious when people get done making out. Especially with the way you do it."

"Come on. We are gonna be with Heeseung all day. I need something to think about while we watch the movie." He sounded so desperate for you. He started to use the baby voice he uses when he wants something. When you shook your head again which caused him to groan and put his head in your lap. "Please babygirl..I can't go a whole day without kissing your pretty plump lips." That's what got you. The second you leaned down to give him a deep kiss, you both heard the front door open. "Awe that's him. Well, let's get this day over with.” Jake hopped up and stood with his back facing the door. “And don't say anything stupid that'll get us caugh-"

Jake could barely finish his stupid sentence before Heeseung walked in and leaned on the doorway. "Let's get going. Y/n, Put the snacks in your bag."

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All the flashbacks and memories were running through your head while you read the text message. "Heeseung.." Before giving him an explanation you realized there wasn't one and just started thinking of which excuse you should go with. "What is this?" Oh. That's really how your instincts decide to play it? The oblivious act was not gonna work on Heeseung and the way you were executing it, that act wouldn't work on anyone.

"That's exactly what I'm asking you. Why do I have my friend texting me at 3am, telling me that he's been fucking my girl behind my back?"

"Jake is a dirty liar. I don't even know why he would tell you that. Let alone why you would believe him."

"I don't know. I've been friends with him for almost 15 god damn years and he's never slept with any of my girlfriends so.."

You tilted your head, waiting for him to finish his sentence. "So?..."

"So I'm guessing it's true." Heeseung walked over to you. "I should have known." He shook his head. "I should have known the minute I caught you leaving the house in the middle of the night." Heeseung was getting himself worked up. You could tell he was slowly boiling over. "I'm so fucking stupid. You told me.." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "You fucking told me you were going out for gas and I believed you. I can't believe I trusted you."

"What about Jake?" You quietly said.

Heeseung tilted his head and raised his eyebrows. "Did you seriously just ask me that? What about him?"

"Why is it all my fault and why is none of the blame on him?" Just as you said that you both heard a doorbell ring, causing your heads to turn towards the front door.

Heeseung chuckled and started to walk over to the door. "Funny you ask that. Cause I actually called him earlier and asked if he was busy. Told him that if not then he should come over so the three of us could talk." When Heeseung went to open the door you couldn't take it. You wanted to leave but there was no where to run. So you ran up to Heeseung and tried to convince him otherwise.

"Please Hee. Don't do this." You pleaded for him to just ignore it or tell the person on the other side to go away. You knew it was Jake and your heart couldn't take anymore stress or heartbreak.

"Don't call me that. I don't ever wanna hear you use that nickname again." Heeseung replied before pulling away from you to open the door for the visitor. Of course, it was just who you expected.

When the door swung open and you were both met with the main manipulator himself, You looked away and ran into the kitchen to get away from what was awaiting you. While Heeseung on the other hand faced his best friend head on. The minute he opened the door, Heeseung gave Jake the most bold and serious stare possible.

Jakes 'sincre' eyes met Heeseung's serious ones and he only said three words. "I'm sorry, man."

"Yeah. You said that already." Heeseung said as he leaned a arm on the door frame. "Don't just stand there, come inside."

Heeseung shut the door after Jake walked in. "So.." Jake took his coat off and started to walk towards the living room. "Where is she?"

"I don't know. She probably ran upstairs." Heeseung just stood near the front door, covering his face with one of his hands as he let the other rest on his hip. He was thinking about how hard this whole conversation was gonna be. "She's embarrassed."

Jake chuckled and started walking up the stairs to go find you. "Embarrassed? What is she embarrassed for? She did this to herself."

When you overheard Jake say such lies you came out of the kitchen. You were almost just as mad as Heeseung now. "I did this to myself?!"

You scanned the room for Jake and tears almost fell when you seen him and his shit eating grin standing at the top of the stairs. "There she is. There's the bell of the ball. Or should I say the lying cheating slut." Your eyes widened when Jake came at you with such vigor. He walked over to you and then pointed at Heeseung. "Look at him." When you wouldn't turn your head to face Heeseung's, Jake grabbed your chin with his other hand and forced you to. "Look at how hurt you've made him. All because you wanted one night of fun with me."

"It was more than one night, you asshole!" There goes the tears. You pushed Jake away from you and shook your head to get his grip off of you.

That's when Heeseung decided to jump back in on the argument. "How many nights exactly was it, Y/n?" He took Jake's spot and stood right in front of you. "Was it a special occasion type thing or was it every other weekend?" Heeseung pulled out his cellphone. "Oh, how about this? Let's go through our messages and see just how many times you have used a shitty excuse to blow me off."

Jake walked over and leaned on Heeseung's shoulder. "Should we make a game out of it? Try to guess which excuses are real and which ones are fake."

When Heeseung pulled up the messages he scrolled back a bit and then let out a giggle. "What about this one?" He showed Jake and kept it hidden from you. "Was she telling the truth?"

Jake took time to read it and then he giggled too before shaking his head. "Sorry but she was lying. It’s what women do, Heeseung. They lie and cheat.”

Gosh this was SO ironic coming from him. The fact Heeseung hasn’t called him out yet surprised you but it seemed most of his anger was towards you. "Who do you think you are? Don't try to pin this all on me." You turned to Heeseung and threw your hands in the air. "How can you let him stand here and talk about you like this? How can you let him come into our home and disrespect us?!"

"Us?! No y/n, I don't think you understand. There is no more us." Heeseung pushed you out of the way and walked up the stairs. He was gone for a bit before walking back with two suitcases. "And this home is no longer 'ours'."

"Are those my things? Are you throwing me out?!" You started to run up the steps but before you could Heeseung threw the bags over the stairs. You stood there shocked for a moment before the anger struck. "What the fuck! I'm not just a animal, Heeseung! You can't just throw me out onto the streets whe-"

"I can and I will. Do you expect me to keep you here after what you've done to me?"

"So let me get this straight." You pointed to Jake who was standing at the bottom of the stairs so innocently. "You'll kick me out and never speak to me again but there's no repercussions for Jake?" You gave Heeseung an exasperated look. "Am I the only one who this falls on? What's so special about Jake that you just can't bring yourself to lay the iron fist on him?

"What do you want me to do Y/n?! Want me to get in a fist fight with him because my girlfriend made a move on him?"

"He was the one who made a move on me first!"

Jake shook his finger. "Uhh actually no. That's a lie because if I remember correctly you told me that you had been wanting to hook up with me for months before I even brought it up to you."

"Ah ha!" You pointed at him again. "So you do admit that you're the one who made a move on me first!"

When Jake realized you caught him he switch the topic so no blame could fall on him yet. "I told you the first time we did it that it would never happen again. I made it clear that it was a mistake and that I never wanted to continue contact after that."

"I never asked for you again after the first time."

"So explain to me how you and Jake became a casual thing. If neither of you contacted the other after the first time then how did this become an item."

"Jake called me a two weeks after and told me he couldn't control himself. He said he knew it was wrong to go behind YOUR back but he couldn't help it and needed me in his bed again."

Heeseung looked hurt by this information and sent Jake a perplexed look. You knew he was secretly hurting and was trying to keep it together but he asked for the truth. So you gave it to him.

Jake definitely noticed the look Heeseung gave him so he took that as the cue to start explaining himself.

Only he didn't explain himself. Instead he shifted the blame again and somehow made Heeseung even more mad at you. "Oh? Was I the one who hit you up on Valentine's day and practically begged you to come over and fuck me?"

"Wait..Valentine's day?" Heeseung turned back to you with his brows furrowed. "Didn't I have to spend Valentine's Day in the ER with my brother?" You seen Heeseung start walking down the steps towards you. "I thought you were sick in bed all day and couldn't come with me to the hospital.

When Heeseung said that Jakes eyes widened and he held a smirk on his face. A smirk that made it obvious that he was trying not to laugh. "So..how is it possible that you were sick at home AND over my house on Valentine's Day?"

More tears found their way in your eyes when Jake fed into the fire that was burning in Heeseung. "I n-never went over Jake's house. Heeseung, I swear. I was at home on Valentine's Day." Your emotions started taking control and you started falling apart inside. The lying was a clear sign of that.

"Heeseung." Jake looked over at his best friend. "Why would I lie about something like this? Shit, I even have pictures in my camera roll that me and her took on Valentine's Day."

When Heeseung got quiet Jake knew it was the perfect time to convince him. "Take a look. They aren’t dirty pictures or anything. Just some pics we took at dinner." Jake pulled out his phone and started tapping and scrolling until he found the picture he was referring to. "Check the date."

Heeseung's face got even more sour when he seen this piece of evidence. "Seriously, Y/n?! While I was at the hospital with my brother?!" You jumped when he got loud. You don't know why. Heeseung never hit you but you were so scared. "To think that my girlfriend would rather fuck my best friend than come with me to the hospital to care for my brother is...a wake up call." He started to walk over to you. "I'm surprised I didn't find out earlier. Love makes you so blind and oblivious sometimes."

When you thought Heeseung would zero in on you some more for the horrible truth he just found out, he turned around. "And you." He looked straight at Jake and shook his head. "I can't even begin to tell you how hurt I am."

Jake put his head down in false shame and nodded at Heeseung's words. "You're right. I'm sorry I let me and y/n's relationship get this far."

Heeseung waited to hear more from Jake but that was it. Heeseung raised an eyebrow. "So why did you do it?"

"I'm sorry?" Jake was a bit confused by the question.

"You said you knew your relationship with y/n shouldn't have gotten that far. So why did it? Why did you call her back and tell her you needed more."

Jake rubbed his arm. "I honestly couldn't tell you. Heeseung..You know I'm not the best with girls and so when y/n showed me the passion and love that she did I couldn't just let her go. I wanted more of that passion in my life."

"So what.." Heeseung shrugged and tried to hold in the tears that were threatening to fall. He didn't wanna cry. He wanted to be a man and face this situation with a cold attitude but it was too much..even for him. "Are you like..in love with her or something?"

Jake whipped his head up at Heesung and quickly shook his head. "N-No. I don't love her but I-"

Heeseung walked down the steps, walking past you until he reached Jake. "Are you saying you wanna steal her love and passion away from me?"

"Heeseung, I-"

No matter what Jake tried to say, Heeseung wouldn't let him get one word in. "Because that's exactly what you did. You stole her from me and ruined a perfectly good relationship. I can't even live in the same house as her anymore because all I can think about when I look at her is how you defiled and ruined her."

"He didn't ruin me, Heeseung." You tried to speak to him and get him on your side. "I'm still your perfect angel." You couldn't stop sniffling. "I'm still your baby."

Heeseung shook his head. "No. It's not the same anymore. God, I can't believe this is ending like this." You could see a tear fall onto his cheek but before you could wipe it for him, he turned away from you and Jake.

"It doesn't have to end like this!" You followed him into the living room and sat down on the couch in front of him with your hands together. "Please. Please give me another chance. I'll be better to you, I promise."

"No." Heeseung sat down next to you and took one of your hands into his. "I can't do that y/n. If I take you back then I'll have to break it off with Jake." Heeseung said this quietly to you so that Jake wouldn't hear.

I nodded my head and leaned closer to whisper to Heeseung. "Do it. Break it off with Jake and keep me. Jake was the one who started all of this turmoil. You should hear the things Jake used to say about you when we were alone."

"What type of things did he used to say?" Heeseung asked as he looked up at you and held your hand.

Just then Jake slowly stepped into the living room and you could see a scowl creep across his face when he caught glimpse of the hand holding you and Heeseung were doing. "Ask him yourself. Jake tell him about the things you used to say."

Heeseung let go of your hand and stood up to question Jake. "You gonna explain?"

Jake chuckled and wore that stupid smirk again. "Explain what? Explain how y/n used to scream out about how she wanted me and how i fucked her better than you?"

Before Jake could speak anymore a loud smack echoed throughout the room. "Could you have at least some respect. Is this situation not serious to you?"

The slap from Heeseung immediately made Jake go wide eyed. "I was just quoting what your so-called girlfriend said about me."

Heeseung went for another smack but Jake managed to block this one. "Did you just say 'so called' girlfriend? She was my very serious girlfriend who I loved very much.” Hearing Heeseung speak in past tense broke your heart and stunned your hope of a second chance.

"Listen. I'm sorry if you think I'm being disrespectful about this but you need to wake up and realize that she's the problem here." He put his hand on Heeseung's shoulder and looked him in the eyes. "Our friendship was perfectly fine before she came along."

"Our relationship was perfectly fine before YOU came along!" You stood up behind Heeseung and put your hand on his back.

"Get your hands off of him, slut." Jake pulled him away from you.

"He's my boyfriend."

"Didn't you hear him earlier? He's throwing your ass out."

"No. He said he's reconsidering giving me a second chance." You grabbed Heeseung's hand. "Right?"

"Go on. Tell her no." Jake’s grip on his shoulder tightened.

Heeseung broke away from the both of you and he put his hands up defensively. "Both of you need to back up." He stammered. "I don't even know what to think anymore. All of this is too exhausting."

"It's an easy answer." Jake stood near Heeseung. "She's out of the picture."

"Jesus, Jake. Why are you being so overbearing?"

"Because you are having sympathy for this girl who backstabbed you."

"Oh, that's rich coming from you." You said under your breath.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Oh, Come on Jake. You're not a very innocent soul in this." Heeseung let slip.

"So what? You're on her side now?"

"I'm not on anyone's side! There are no sides in this!"

You sat back down and started to suddenly cry again. Both of the boys stop and looked at you. One of them came to comfort you and the other didn't.

Can you guess which one comforted you.

"Baby.." Heeseung kneeled down and rushed to your side. "Why are crying again?” He brought a hand up to rub your knee.

Of course it was Heeseung. It was always him. How could you not tell that Jake never truly loved you. Jake was only using you for pleasure. If anyone is to blame for this, it’s you for trusting Jake. With his dumb smile and empty words.

"You're gonna leave me Heeseung." You sobbed. "Aren't you?"

"I'm.." He paused and looked away from you. Trying to figure out the answer to that question for himself. He still hasn't decided what he wants to do. "I don't know, Y/n. I just know I love you."

"So you are basically saying you're taking her back?" Jake scoffed. "Gosh, you're so stupid."

That's when Heeseung snapped even more. "Seriously? What is your problem?! Do you have no shame or remorse?!"

"I have remorse but I'm just telling you this girl is not worth fighting for."

"You just stumble in and ruin my relationship. Do you even feel bad about what you did?”

Jake shook his head. “If it means I saved you from wasting your time on her.”

Heeseung stood up again. That was it. He couldn’t do anymore of this back and forth. "Get out. This is our home and I need you to leave right now." Heeseung raised his voice and pointed to the door.

You've never seen Heeseung yell at Jake like that. They are best friends so you have never seen them really argue. Unless it was over the video game. When Jake stood in silence for a while he eyed the two of you and both, you, and Heeseung could tell he had so much more to say. He looked like he wanted to blurt out a thousand things at once. "Do you really want me to leave?"

"Yes. Want me to walk you out?"

Jake widened his eyes and shook his head. "Nah. That's fine." He waved his hand in the air and turned around to walk to the front door. "I've been here a thousand times. I know my way out."

Heeseung waited until he heard the door open and close. He let out a sigh he never knew he was holding in. "It's just you and me now." Heeseung had a sort of disgusted look on his face as he turned to eye you up and down. "How could you let him do that." He shook his head and walked up to you, bringing his hand up to cup your cheek. "You let him see and touch all of the places that were meant for me." His other hand started to travel up your t-shirt as he wrapped his arm around your waist. "I was your first and I was supposed to be your last."

"I'm s-so sorry." The tears were still running from earlier. You couldn't tell if the mood was more or less tense since Jake left. You looked up at him and leaned into his chest. "Please don't make me leave. I'm sorry I caused this."

He sighed and put the hand that was cupping your face behind your head, holding you close to him. God he wanted to scream and scold you but he just couldn't bring himself to truly kick you out. He loved you and all the chaos that came with you. It's not like you did this on the daily or anything and he knew that. That's why he was seriously considering taking his girl back. He wanted his sweet princess back.

"I'm not gonna kick you out."

You leaned back and looked up at him with wide teary eyes. "Really?"

He nodded.

"Does this mean you are gonna break it off with Jake?"

"You know I can't do that, baby." He kissed your head. "He's my best friend and I can't abandon him. Just like I can't abandon you."

"Oh Heeseung.." you wrapped your arms around his neck and jumped up into his arms. "I'm so sorry. I'll do anything to prove myself to you and show you that I'm gonna be better."

"You keep saying that but you are gonna have to show me now." Heeseung lightly pushed you down on the couch. "How about you take your pants off." With no hesitation you listened to him and took your pajama pants off. You then took your shirt and bra off to get it out of the way.

"You a little excited?"

Nodding, you spread your legs for him.

He chuckled. "Jake's right. You are a fucking slut. I never seen this side of you before." Heeseung leaned in, reached his hand down and started to harshly rub your clit. "You're always so incredibly innocent for me." He swears when he took your virginity and you looked at him with that doe like gaze he fell in love with you and you're pure like aura. He couldn't lie that he sort of liked this side of you too. You were just as submissive as before but a tad bit more straight forward.

Just when he got you wet enough, Heeseung stopped rubbing you and leaned back again. "Turn around for me."

Once again, you did as he said and turned around on your stomach.

"You gotta understand that I can't let you off too easy, baby." Heeseung started rubbing your clothed ass before he landed a hard slap on it. "If I don't show some assertiveness then you're gonna think it's okay to go around whoring yourself out." Another smack landed on one of your cheeks.

You let out a helpless yelp. "I promise. I'm never gonn-"

That landed you another hard smack "Don't speak. I'll tell you when you can talk to me."

He started undoing his belt and he swung it out of the loop holes before folding it. "Get over here and lean over my lap." Before he could say anything else, you bent over his knees. “Should I give you the pleasure or pain first?” He started to rub your ass again where he smacked earlier.

Not wanting to piss him off anymore, you waited a bit to answer because he told you not to speak unless he said so. “You can talk now, honey.”

“Pleasure!” You blurted out. “Give me pleasure. I’m begging you.”

He thought about it and nodded. “Alright baby. Whatever you want.” Heeseung set aside his leather belt for now and quickly pulled your panties down. He grabbed your hair and pulled your head up to whisper in your ear. “I’m gonna finger fuck you until you beg me to lay my cock into you.”

Ughh why was he so irresistible. Every word slipped off his tongue like a symphony and it incited the heat in your lower abdomen. Slowly you felt his hand creep right between your thighs and you opened your legs best you could. Heeseung slipped two wet fingers past your folds. Your man knew exactly what you wanted because he wasted no time pumping and pistoling his fingers in and out of your plush cunt.

Since Heeseung was getting tired of waiting for his turn he decided to speed up the process of you getting yours. The way he decided to do this however was something you were a bit scared for. He let go of your hair and reached over to grab his belt. “I’ll show you what dirty cheaters get.”

A loud wham filled the room, followed by a yelp from you. He continued fingering you roughly as he hit your ass with his belt ever so often. "Did I not fuck you good enough? Or did you just get tired of me? Is that why you went and had Jake take over for a while?"

"No Heeseung. I could never get tired of you."

"Then why did you do it darling?"

You stayed silent and looked down in shame when you had nothing to say. "It's okay. I'll make sure he never gets in your pretty little head again." Heeseung grabbed you by the wrist and pulled you off of his lap as he stood up. "Make sure you stay dumb for me and my cock only."

Heeseung pushed you down by your shoulders and you looked up at him, while getting on your knees. Watching as he pulled his layers of clothes down and let out his unbelievably hard dick. “I gave you pleasure then pain. You put me through so much pain and so now you have to give me my pleasure.”

You moaned as you took him in your mouth. Letting him do as he pleased. You were so pliant for him. The safe feeling you got from Heeseung made you start to think. You couldn’t believe you ever took this for granted. “Your pussy is probably gushing wet while sucking my cock. Isn’t it?” Heeseung kept a fistful of your hair in his hand while he thrusted his hips towards your face. “You wanna touch your pretty pussy, don’t you?”

When he could feel and so he pulled your head back and made sure you looked up at him. “Go on. Play with yourself while I cum on your face, gorgeous.” He took his other hand and started jerking right in front of your face, groaning when he caught a glimpse of you actually moving your hand down to begin playing with yourself.

You whimpered as one of your fingers slipped past your entrance. Heeseung could feel his first orgasm of the night coming and you were trying to finish what Heeseung started earlier.

Your whole body tensed up to give you a warning that your orgasm was here. As if all this wasn’t enough, Heeseung groaned loudly while his cum dripped onto your face and lips.

Heeseung bent down and grabbed your chin roughly. “Look at that face. So cute.” He leaned so close that his lips were almost touching yours. "This is your last chance, you little whore. Don't fuck with me again."

Everything was still so fuzzy but you managed to nod slowly. "Of course. Never again."

He kissed you deeply like he's never kissed you before.

"Never again."

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word count - 5.6k

Notes: I’m so happy I am finally in a mood to start writing again. This is not very good for my first work back but it’s something light. Hope it’s okay and please ignore any grammar or English mistakes!

#smut #kpop smut #minors dni #enhypen smut #angst #heeseung smut #jake smut #Spotify

154 notes · View notes

jccatstudios · 5 months

Note

I have been following your soc comic adaptation and it just so good!!! I love how you draw them!

I have just one question: Why did you not include Inej's opening musings about Kaz on the first page? (Kaz Brekker didn't need a reason etc) I actually really like how there is not text on the first two pages, it's really atmospheric and moody so this really is not a criticism, I don't want to insult you. I guess I was just wondering what the thought process behind that was?

Oh, I've been wanting to talk about this for a while! Buckle up, this is gonna be one of my long comic rants. (Also, no offense taken at all! Anyone's welcome to question my artistic choices and I'm always happy to take critique, even though that isn't your intention.)

So, the thing is I actually planned on including that first paragraph into the comic! Here's when I first shared the thumbnails on here. Just for the sake of this post, I'll insert them here too.

The boxes are meant to be where excerpts of that introduction would go. When I was creating the thumbnails, I was thinking about how iconic these lines were and how well they introduce the world and characters. I even finished the pages with the intention to include those lines. This is from my original csp file.

When I lettered it all out, I felt like something wasn't right...? Hard to explain. I wanted silence for the opening and the narration took that away. I then thought about the reader who'd go into this without reading the novel first, wondering if they'd be thinking, Who's this Kaz Brekker guy? Is it this character on the page? It's clearer in the book, but I didn't think it paired well with what I drew. I didn't want any confusion. It's also Inej's chapter, and while Kaz's parts take up most of it, I still wanted it to feel like her POV and her story. We can hold off officially meeting Kaz until page four.

But the main reason I took it out comes down to my philosophy when it comes to comic adaptations. I believe that an adaptation should use the original story in the best way for the secondary medium. A comic adaptation should play to the strength of comics, not the original source material.

Time and time again, I see a lot of comic adaptations of books try to use a book's strength instead of a comic's. When that happens, you get pages upon pages of narration boxes and exposition that could've easily been told in a single panel's image. If you want to read excerpts from the original novel, go do that! They're beautiful and well-crafted and you should be reading the original anyway! If you're making a comic adaptation, make a comic, not an illustrated version of the novel (that's a whole field of its own).

This whole thing really ties well into what I'm doing for Chapter 3. Kaz is such an internal character, his chapters have a lot more exposition that isn't setting description or character actions. I've had to do a lot more of my own writing for this chapter than the last just to turn that exposition into his own voice as an internal monologue. Sometimes, it's just a change from "he" to "I," but there are other times I've had to write new dialogue and find ways to naturally flow between thoughts. If I didn't do the work to adapt the expository text and instead just put in narration boxes of text from the book, there would be a greater disconnect between the reader and Kaz. Third-person limited works great in books and doesn't separate the readers from the story, but in comics, first-person internal dialogue keeps the readers inside the scene better.

If I were to redo Chapter 2, I think I would try to find a way to incorporate the information from the chapter intro better. I think by losing the intro I initially planned to include, I didn't establish certain ideas very well. Ketterdam and Kerch are established later on pages 4 and 5, but I don't think I ever go back and mention The Barrel. Also, the idea that Kaz is deliberate, even if his reputation says otherwise, is important too. I've made sure to fix this kind of issue in Chapter 3 and keep record of what kind of information I'm losing as I adapt it.

#comic rant over!#thanks for the ask I really love talking about this stuff #soc comic adaptation #asks #comics talk

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ceilidho · 4 months

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Do you have any advice or tips for writing dialogue? It's what I struggle most with 😩😩😩

haha I wish I did 😩 honestly this one sucks the most for me because I truly feel like I don't understand how people talk, or like, I'm really only beginning to get it. I remember spending most of my teenage years (I started writing fanfiction around age 13 or so) really not understanding how people talk to each other and being supremely confused about it.

Once again, the biggest help you're ever going to get is just watching a lot and reading a lot and paying attention to how people talk. I mentioned this in my other writing advice ask, so I'll just reiterate below and add some other observations I have on how people speak:

If you're writing fanfiction, watch or read the source material as much as possible, until you can almost hear the way the character sounds in your head. Take time to understand things like their accent and how they speak (do they talk a lot or very little? do they use slang or enunciate everything? do they speak quickly or slowly?). Here, you just want to concentrate on the cadence of their speech / their speech patterns. If they speak plainly or use lots of proverbs or turns of phrases, that sort of thing. If you have that down, you've honestly done half the work. Even I often reread my work and go "fuck, all of these people SOUND the same even though they're saying different things".

A super important point I should make before anything else is that dialogue is intrinsic to character. If you have a taciturn, sullen, aloof character, they probably won't be a very emotional or heartfelt interlocutor. The things (the content of their dialogue) they'll want to speak about will also reflect this - they might complain more often, might not offer praise as readily. They won't ask for help or share vulnerable parts of them.

A more positive character will be the exact opposite of that. They might be more eager to offer advice or praise. They might feel nervous or uncomfortable about confrontation or calling someone out if they're doing something the character doesn't like.

Essentially, when you're not sure what a character would say, think about:

Who is this person? What are their core attributes?

What is their end goal from this conversation? (or, if it's just chatter / conversation for conversation's sake, what kinds of topics might they be interested in?)

If there is a goal, how would this particular character achieve it (or would they be unsuccessful if they're too timid or mean about it)? Would they be blunt, circumlocutory, deliberately confusing, manipulative - would they get frustrated with themselves because even the character isn't able to say the thing they want to say?

Another thing you have to understand about the way people speak, even if this is VASTLY frustrating when writing because it takes you longer to get to the point, is that people rarely just outright say what they want. Sooommeeee people do, but even in your personal life you'll know those kinds of people to be blunt, straight forward, etc. Most people aren't like that. If you need to take the extra chapter or couple paragraphs to wrangle the truth out of someone, that's pretty natural.

I try to avoid clichés or anything corny in my dialogue unless it makes sense for that character (for instance, Price might be more likely to use like generic white guy colloquialisms like "you're barking up the wrong tree" or "let's rock and roll" lmaoo).

Anyway, I don't have much advice for dialogue because I also struggle with it, but one thing to keep in mind is that readers are very aware of characterization, even subconsciously. Don't sacrifice good characterization even if it means you need to redo a scene or take longer to get to something.

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00127am · 2 months

Text

signed with love and forever yours, renjun

postage. huang renjun & gn! reader, implied enemies (pride and prejudice coded), mentions of kissing cost to ship. 834 words

the day after you told me you loved me, i felt as if i've been blind my whole life. as if, after your confession, rose colored glasses had slipped upon my eyes to permanently rest on the bridge of my nose. to paint everything in sight with such a vibrance, vitality, that i swear i had never seen it before. though the doctors will say i have never been blind nor colorblind, that i have been able to see everything to the full extent of the human capacity, i will attest that it was you who granted me the ability of sight for the first time.

even before your concession, i found you in everything. hiding between the pages of my favorite books, seeping into every shade of my paints, infiltrating and consuming every corner and nook in my brain and body so that there was no place in which you were unable to execute the jurisdiction of your dictatorship. it's something so utterly irritating that it drove me up the wall and then some, convinced this was one of your numerous ways to get underneath my skin.

perhaps if i stopped to think, to consider why you seemed to be drowning out every other aspect of my life--leaving only thoughts, dreams, and fantasies of you behind in your wake--why you are able to slip underneath my skin and weave such a tender waltz through the strings of my heart--then i would have written this letter much sooner. certainly before your own proclamation.

i am sure now that i have never experienced love or any such iteration of infatuation towards anyone other than you. a feeling so utterly foreign and inordinate that it feels bittersweet on my tongue. scraped off with a drag of my teeth and a reluctant reciprocation stuck in the back of my throat. an ardent admission that i'm afraid you would find to be more bitter than sweet.

i'm not good with my words. and i'm not good with you. so it's only fitting that it's this letter that will return my the full effect of my affections back to whom they belong as i muster up any semblance of courage to speak them out loud. so in the meantime, read this as many times as it takes before i tell you in person. so that perhaps you can meet my confession with a kiss and i'll be rewarded for each and every humiliating detail written in record for you to keep (though even if you held them over my head, i find myself unable to even care--so endeared to everything you do, a degree of which makes me grit my teeth).

i love you and love you more. more than any words written here can express and much more than i'd care to admit. so wait for me and my confession in hopes that i'll be able to properly express just how much i love you. a love that gifted sight and a weight on my chest that proves to be much more fatal than any ailment of the heart.

forever (and unwillingly) yours,

about renjun's love letters.

renjun's handwriting is messy and sharp, every word pressed deep into the paper. written with such strong emotions (of both love and vexation) and in what seems to be such a hurry to spit the words out onto the page that he nearly ruins the letter in the process. every consonant and vowel is written in a way that can only be described as raw, unfiltered and rushed. straight from his heart to yours, sometimes with an attempt for a roundabout omission--one which does nothing to hide the full extent of his adoration.

he writes on crumpled, tattered paper. with holes and scratched out words, flowing into scratched out lines, sometimes paragraphs. often unreadable, you tease, but in truth perhaps you enjoy reading them over and over and over again until even the words laying dormant beneath scrawled, etched scribbles feel as if they've been carved into your flesh--all with the excuse of legibility.

to others, the state of his letters may appear as a lack of care. for what lover sends you their affections that look as if they have been to hell and back, pages that seem to hold niceties beneath crass adjectives and loathing sentiments. only to be found through wrinkled lines and harshly illustrated remarks. but these roughened letters are slipped within perfectly creased envelopes, sealed with a kiss (covered by a thin strip of tape), and covered with the numerous efforts of his artistic handiwork. there's a care for them to get to you safely. a care for you to read what he truly has to say, his unadulterated feelings (unconsumed by trivial allegories of love) that are poured out through every messy line of prose. even if his letters are signed with a reminder that every bit of his love towards you is unintended (and yet, he would never trade it for any fortune or feeling in the world).

your mailbox

taglist. @evilsailorsenshi @222brainrot @sour-chaos @jenaisnte thank you for supporting me! ♡

🧾 © 00127am 2024

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ihatelink · 11 months

Text

Trust Fall (Revali X Reader) - Part 1

Word Count: 2,780

Pairing: Revali X Reader (Female)

Fandom/Universe: Legend of Zelda (Breath of The Wild)

Themes/Content: Romance (Slow Burn), Fantasy, Action.

Warnings: None

Synopsis: You visit your friend in Rito Village in order to escape the sense of dread looming over your home of Castle Town as the prophesied doomsday slowly grows closer. It is here on your visit that you meet a Rito warrior who turns your world upside-down.

Authors Note: Finally got round to writing this! Since he's not mentioned in TOTK at all I just had to start a fanfic for him. I miss him so much. I'm uploading this from my laptop so if the formate is weird or there needs to be more paragraphs just let me know! I don't consider myself a pro on Zelda lore so I do apologise for any mistakes. Also, this fan fiction will have two endings! (One canon to BOTW and one canon to Hyrule Warriors) Other than that, I hope you enjoy! - I don't know what to call myself... should I go by my username? What about something stupid like Loafus?... I don't know... I'll work on it 🪶🤎

Rito Village was your second home. You felt so much comfort and associated the place with such a feeling of warmth, it was surprising you hadn't made it your permanent residence. When it came to Rito Village you only had positive memories.

This was mostly due to your best friend, Frita, being a rito. The two of you had met at a very young age and had been best friends ever since, visiting each other every couple of weeks or whenever you had spare time. She would teach you about the ways of the rito and you in turn would teach her about hylians. Frita truly was like a sister to you, and you loved her more than words could say.

"Daydreaming again?", her voice broke you from your thoughts, her bright blue eyes sparkling with joy. You blinked a few times, finally registering her words, and you couldn't help but giggle to yourself. "Yes, I guess I was". "What we're you daydreaming about?", she asked, turning her attention back to the salmon sizzling in the village's communal cooking pot, the aroma swirling through the air, making your mouth water in anticipation. Later in the night was the perfect time for cooking here as most ritos had gone to sleep; Their poor night vision meant that many would retire early in the evening. "Just thinking about flying", you confess sheepishly and Frita rolled her eyes playfully, responding with, "You're always thinking about flying". "I can't help it whenever I'm here. You all look so majestic and free", you gushed. "I would love to be able to experience what it's like to fly for myself instead of having to be on your back". "Perhaps if you pray to Hylia enough she'll allow you to become one of us", she chuckled and you couldn't help but laugh along with her. Frita eventually added the tebantha wheat to the pot and the goat butter as the two of you talked about everything under the stars. "Are you still planning on moving to Hateno Village?", she asked as she began to plate up your dinners. "Yes, unfortunately. It means I'll be further away from you", you mumbled and Frita's face fell in disappointment. "It's the best option as, if this impending doom really is to show itself one day, the city centre is most likely one of the first places to be attacked. If I could, I'd love to live here with you". "Well, why don't you?". You shook your head. "You know I'd stick out like a sore thumb here. I wouldn't be able to pull my weight or help the village in any way. I'd be more of a burden than anything". "Perhaps not! If I could find a way for you to easily integrate into life here, would you move here?". The more Frita spoke, the more you felt a warmth spread through your entire being. "You'd have me, you'd be well protected- our warriors are exceptional, there's plenty of food and resources in the area… just don't make any final decisions to move just yet. Allow me a chance". You chuckled, taken aback by your friends willingness to help you and keep you by her side. "Okay, I'll give you a chance".

You cut yourself short when you noticed movement out of your peripheral vision. The gentle padding of talloned footsteps grew closer and bright emerald green eyes encased in bright red watched from the darkness. Finally a rito came into view. "Rather late to be cooking, don't you think?". His tone was sharp and precise, you couldn't tell if he was making small talk or if he was irritated with the fact that the two of you were occupying the cook pot. Did he usually use it at this time? "Oh! Revali! Sorry, did you want to use the cooking pot", Frita asked, a light quality to her voice as she politely addressed him, yet an awkward silence seemed to settle over the three of you as his eyes travelled from her to settle on you, staring down his beak right into your very soul. "Who is this hylian?", he asked bluntly. "This is my best friend. She's visiting for a short while", she informed him of your name and that you were from Castle Town. "Would you care to join us?", you then offered, cutting through the awkward pause in conversation. "We have plenty to go around". Frita cut you a glance, surprised by your sudden offer, but did not protest, adding "Yes, do join us! I'm assuming you've just finished practice? You must be famished". Revali opened his beak but quickly shut it, perhaps to reject the offer but thought better of it. He took a moment to smooth out the cream scarf around his neck. "Well, if you insist, I suppose I could join you", he hummed, making his way to sit across from you.

As he took his seat, he placed a beautifully crafted bow to his side, coated in vibrant colours and intricate designs, a scrap of teal fabric tied to one end. He held himself with pride, sitting tall, spine straight, shoulders squared. With the fact that he was taller than you, it was a little intimidating. "Have you visited our village before?", he asked, and it took you a second to realise his question was directed towards you. "Oh yes, plenty of times. I've been visiting since I was a child. That's how I met Frita", you explained, gesturing to your friend as dinner was being dished onto plates chiselled from stone. "Hmm, surely I would have met you by now if that were the case", he muttered as he was handed his food, "it's interesting how our paths have never crossed". You shrugged unsure of what else to say, other than, "Perhaps we weren't meant to meet yet. Us meeting now may be fate?", you laughed lightly, amused by the thought. Revali scoffed in response, "I believe we are in control of our own fate. For example; I didn't become one of the greatest rito warriors through fate and sheer dumb luck alone". "And so modest about it too", you joked which caused Frita to just about choke on her food. She tried to excuse herself as calmly as possible, covering her beak with her wing while still coughing her lungs up. Judging by her reaction, you considered how you may have overstepped a boundary. Not everyone knew when you were joking upon first meeting you. You often sounded more serious than you intended. "I'm only teasing", you clarified, playing with your food on the end of your fork absentmindedly. "I'm sure you're more than deserving of the title", you tried for your most sincere smile you could conjure, yet Revali didn't seem convince.

Finally, Frita had caught her breath, tears in the corners of her eyes. "No no, Revali really is the greatest of our warriors. Our people gave him that title", she croaked, her throat sounding raw from coughing. "He's the pride of the rito", she insisted, dropping her voice to a more serious tone. Your face contorted in amused disbelief before you began to wrack your brain for any information that would help you deduct the truth. "So he is the rito that's won the annual archery competition for the past five years? He's that same-…", you began to trail off, recalling the conversation you had with your father.

You came from a wealthy family, both your parents working for the King and late Queen of Hyrule . Your mother was the royal gerudo correspondent and your father was the royal rito correspondent- this being the reason you spent so much time in Rito Village growing up, as well as Gerudo Town. You remembered the past few years you couldn't make the annual archery competition held in the village, since you were either accompanying your mother on business trips or doing your own work, but you father had come home stating how the rito 'Revali' had won again. He would then follow up by talking about his superb skills and how his talent for aerial combat were superior in comparison to his peers. Your father claimed that the rito was unmatched and unrivalled, as well as claiming that he may very soon be known as one of- if not the most skilled warrior in all of Hyrule. (Which was very high praise coming from your father, since he was rarely impressed by anyone).

It was like a shock wave was sent through your body. "In the name of Hylia! I didn't realise it was you! I am so sorry! Please forgive my rudeness", you blubbered, putting your half eaten dinner aside, stumbling over your words as you rushed out your apology. "So you have heard of me", he lulled before an amused smirk graced his features. "I suppose I can forgive you since your rudeness was more disbelief than pure ignorance". "Thank you”, you breathed a sigh of relief. “I have heard a lot about your skills and I-… well…", once again you had trailed off. You looked to Frita for reassurance, yet she seemed as nervous as you; her posture was stiff as she sat with a straight spine, her eyes glancing between you and the navy rito. "From what I've heard, you're an incredibly skilled archer", you approached the conversation cautiously, hoping this angle would amend any bitterness you may have caused. Revali looked a you and you felt your breath catch in your throat as you locked eyes before he let out a gruff chuckle. "I suppose you could say that".

You and Frita ate in a comfortable silence while listening to Revali drawl on about the countless competitions he's won along with his many talents regarding aerial combat. Before long, your mind began to wonder.

You couldn't help but think of home. How it was slowly being consumed by a festering anxiety. There was a heavy air across the whole of Castle Town as you all prepared for this prophesied impending doom. The army had began vigorously training since last month. Some of those warriors were your friends- people you had grown up with. It was terrifying to think how some of them you may never see again once the Calamity strikes. Some were beginning to research the ancient technology that had recently been unearthed to see if they could be used to defend Hyrule. These were called guardians, and then there were also the recently uncovered Divine Beasts. At times, it was all a bit much, being at the central hub of Hyrule where there is no escape from the looming sense of dread. Things were moving so quickly and it seemed as though you may never escape the ever present anxiety that hung in the air of Castle Town. But here, in Rito Village, people seemed more relaxed. Many ritos believed that their home would not be effected by the foreseen Calamity. This made the village a nice escape from daily life back home. Here, you weren't reminded of what was to come. You weren't reminded of your duties. You could just breathe easier here in the village nestled into the rocky pillar.

"I do love it here. Rito Village is such a beautiful place. I don't have a single bad memory while being here", you gushed, earning a raised brow from Revali at your comments about his home, his interest now piqued. "Is that so?". Before you could stop her, Frita spewed, "Yes, in fact, she might move here". You shot her a look, a signal to keep that information between the two of you, to which she sheepishly dipped her head in response. You didn't want others knowing of your plans to move just yet, especially since you hadn't even mentioned it to your parents. "A hylian living amongst ritos?", Revali questioned, an amused undertone laced within his words as his luminous eyes narrowed a fraction, as if trying to read your expressions for some sign of the truth. "Hylians aren't equipped for living here. You would struggle". "Yet so many visit and get by just fine", you bit back, sharp tongued yet it was all said with a simple smile across your lips. What he said was true, yet you disliked how he assumed you would struggle when Frita, a fellow rito, believed you could easily adapt to life in the village. "Visiting and residing are very different though", he then shot back, cocking his head to the side as he examined you and your heart began to pound slightly. You felt a pout develop on your features, brows furrowed. He made a point you couldn't argue against. It was the truth. "Well, I'm taking it upon myself to help her integrate into the village before she permanently moves here", Frita chipped in, sensing some tension settling in the air. "If you truly want to move here", Revali began, capturing your attention once more. He wore a smug smirk before he finished, "You'll have to prove yourself".

"Prove myself?", you parroted. "Yes. You'll have to learn our ways and prove to us that you belong here". Revali studied you for a moment, as if he hadn't been doing so all night already. "Firstly, the women of our village are know for being beautiful singers and us men are talented archers. Tell me, can you sing?".

Being from one of the wealthier families of Hyrule Kingdom, you did have the privilege of music lessons from a young age. Your parents wanted the best for you, so consequentially, you had many lessons in a multitude of subjects and areas; Geography, horse riding, music, dance, literature, cooking, etiquette, biology and more.

"I have had many singing lessons", you informed the feathered man matter-of-factly. "It's more a matter of personal taste weather you believe I sound good". "Perhaps you could sing for me tomorrow then. After my training, well meet at the flight range. You can showcase your voice there", he challenged, the smirk across his features growing as he stared down his beak at you. "After all, it would be rather nice to have something to help me relax after such strenuous training", he teased. "And if my voice is to your liking, what do I receive then?". There was a slight pause. "What do you mean?", he tilted his head slightly, perplexed by your response. "Well, if my voice is to your liking then that would mean I have somewhat proven myself worthy of living here amongst your kind", you began, Revali's attention honed in on you, "Which I believe would be worth a reward". "Your reward would be living amongst us", you ignored his comment, pressing on. "That being said, if I prove myself, then I would like to learn archery". "What good would that do you?", he asked. "It's always good for a woman to be able to defend herself, wouldn't you agree?". "But if you were living in Rito Village you wouldn't need to defend yourself", he argued. "I'd have to say it's always good for a woman to know how to use a bow", Frita affirmed your point, edging a little closer to you as she joined the conversation. "Especially a hylian. They are smaller than most races, so it's most likely that any threat they face will be larger than them and could over power them", Frita continued, delving more into her argument. "Exactly, Frita! Meaning wouldn't it be beneficial to have a long range weapon in that instance? Surely, with your knowledge on combat as one of the greatest warriors of our time, you'd agree, Revali". You couldn't help but notice how the feathers around his chest plate plumed in reaction to your words. You'd noticed many ritos would unintentionally do this when feeling prideful, being boastful or being frustrated or angry. Perhaps it was a subconscious way of asserting dominance? Like how a Hylian may square their shoulders to appear larger and more confident in front of others. "It would be an honour to have you teach me".

There was a pause.

"I suppose it would be beneficial for you to have the most skilled archer teach you…", he mused looking off into the night, as if he barely acknowledged your being , like you were nothing more than a speck on his radar. A nuisance. "Alright, you have yourself a deal; continuously show your willingness and progression to integrate into our society, and in turn I will teach you how to use a bow". "And you swear not to go back on your word?", you quirked a brow in Revali's direction. "I swear".

#breath of the wild #legend of zelda #tears of the kingdom #botw revali #revali #x reader #revali x reader #botw tears of the kingdom #totk teba #rito village #rito #loz rito #prince sidon #tears of the kingdom sidon #loz botw

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railingsofsorrow · 2 months

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Hi!! Hope you're doing fine! I was wondering about the one shot “the way I loved you” in the originals masterlist. I'm really curious and I wanted to ask when you plan on posting it?

a/n: I'm glad you asked. this has been sitting on my drafts for a while! happy I can finally post it. hope you like it!

The Way I Love(d) You

[stefan salvatore x reader; kol mikaelson x reader]

[all pictures belong to pinterest]

SONG INSPIRATION » THE WAY I LOVED YOU by taylor swift

summary: stefan salvatore is kind and sensible and you couldn't ask for anything better. but beneath the “you look beautiful tonight” you miss the "screaming and fighting" and the way his name slipped out of your lips at 2a.m. you liked assurance and perfection but you missed insanity. more than anything, you missed the way you loved him. you missed kol mikaelson.

pairings: s.salvatore x f!vampire!reader; k.mikaelson x f!vampire!reader

w.c: 9.4K (I got carried away)

warnings/content: portrayal of healthy and unhealthy relationships dynamic; discussion about life and death; blood (mentioned); non-graphic descriptions of violence; pregnancy (mentioned); slight damon and tyler bashing because they are the most annoying characters ever created; camille o'connell plays therapist; katherine pierce x reader (you blink you miss it); gemini coven (mentioned); discussions about marriage; canon divergence; fluff; happy ending depending on which you're rooting for; paragraphs in italics are flashbacks.

A/N²: this one shot does not follow the tvd + t.o original timeline, so some facts may be out of order.

[part of “the taylor swift anthology”]

navi

masterpost

tvd masterlist

t.o masterlist

[alternate ending]

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

❝ he is sensible and so incredible.

and all my single friends are jealous

he says everything I need to hear, and it's like I couldn't ask for anything better. ❞

“Did you arrive alright?”

You reply with a soft hum, distracted by the bag filled with books related to witchcraft. You really did not think you'd be swiped back to this city again, less alone acting as a librarian for the Original vampires for the hundred time in your life. Oh, well. Who could ever deny Rebekah Mikaelson of her wishes? You had been extremely close before, despite the unsaid goodbyes. She did try to threaten your life if you didn't come to New Orleans soon, but those were empty words. And you could easily take her in a fight – not that she could ever know that.

“Yes,” you say through the phone, remembering there was someone in the other line. “I'm settling in on the hotel.”

“Okay.”

“Stefan.” The corner of your mouth twitches slightly. “Say what you want to say.“

You hear him let out a breath as he usually does when he's holding something back.

“Are you sure you don't need me there with you? I could easily—”

“No,” you cut your fiancée off, albeit in a gentle manner. You sit down at the edge of your hotel bed, feeling the rough fabric of the mattress against your jeans as you inspect the cover of a rather thin book compared to the other thick ones scattered around. “Stefan, I'm perfectly fine. You don't have to worry. And I know you won't listen to me and you'll worry either way…” a smug grin stretches on your face when he tries to speak again. “… but I can handle myself, okay? You can call and text and I'll reply right back.”

Ever since you met Stefan Salvatore, he has had your best interest at heart. Not only yours, but everyone he cared about. In the friendship stage, he slowly inserted himself into your life, taking careful steps to not scare your cold heart away to the mountains. You never knew why, somehow, you had some importance to him. When you started dating, he made sure to introduce you to something that by no means you wanted to partake in: safety. Not the kind in which you are suffocated and trapped, but the kind in which you are held by someone and still are able to take a breath of fresh air. The real meaning of safety.

He takes you on dates and he opens up your car door as the perfect gentleman that he is. The line you look beautiful never straying from his compliments. It took you a while to get used to that. Being loved without having to look over your shoulder, being cared for by someone who would truly be there at the end of the day.

Stefan is safe. He is the warm blanket on a cold day with hot chocolate and a good book. He's the guy who never makes you wait while carrying that endearing softness around him. You couldn't ask for anything better.

“Yeah, alright.” He says with a resigned sigh. “You really don't want me there, huh?” The playfulness being drowned out by a tinge of hesitation in his tone that if you didn't know his tells, you might have missed it.

“You know that's not it.” The book is placed on top of the bedside table. Your choice has been made. “But I don't want to draw unnecessary drama into our lives. As soon as I can get this done, I can come back to New York. To you.”

He offers you a sound of contentment. “That sounds nice to me.” There is some ruffling on his end and he lets out a muffled groan. “Hey, beautiful? I have to go. Damon is hijacking our apartment.”

You briefly recall Stefan making a comment that his brother would visit you guys soon. That had been around a month ago? You are never one to question Damon and his stupid decisions. Fortunately, you were far away to deal with any of that.

“I'm sorry,” you mumble without masking your joy for not having to be present in the same room as Damon Salvatore. “Good luck and don't let him mess with my stuff or I'll personally break his neck and set his dick on fire.“

“I heard that!” You reply that it was meant for him to hear. “He's calling you a menace.” Stefan chuckles at your bickering but he eventually has enough. “Call me if you need anything, yeah? Be safe. I love you.”

“I love you too, and I believe you'll need more backup than I will.” You smile at his scoff and the call comes to an end.

You resist the urge to go to Russeau's to enter an alcoholic coma instead of facing the people you haven't spoken to in a decade. No, you have faced worse and what could possibly go wrong while visiting some old friends?

You snatch the book from the bedside table and tuck it under your arm.

Guess it's time to pay a visit to the Mikaelsons.

━━━━━

Meeting the Mikaelsons had been the best and the worst moment of your vampire life. Yes, some people could be both at the same time. You met Rebekah before you met the others, in a ball a really long time ago. The Mikaelson name had yet to be spread around like a disease due to the extreme danger they represented – where you lived, at least. Vampire groupies already had lots of knowledge about them at the time.

The thing was, you had no idea who Rebekah was until almost everyone in your city was murdered. Her brothers searched for her after a few years of radio silence, apparently. That's when you understood how protective family could be. Klaus, most of them. But that one was more obsessive and paranoid than any other. Rebekah told you that herself, but you saw it with your own eyes through the years you tagged along in their journey.

You have to say that out of anyone in that family, Klaus Mikaelson would be the last person you'd expect to become a father.

He was the one responsible for practically destroying Katerina Petrova's life, along with many other people you couldn't care to mention right now. She had been your friend once, before she became a nuisance in your life. But still. Klaus was ruthless and anyone capable of making an enemy out of him realized the bitter poison that came with it; if not death, of course.

Nevertheless, the cruel reputation of the Mikaelson family did not belong to Klaus only. In levels of pent up rage, you could easily mention Elijah. He was nothing but kind to you in the moments you've spent as friends, but you were aware of the demons he kept at bay for most of his existence. The man tries hard to be a good person and, in your opinion, he achieved that in all of the senses, although he was never really one to trust other people's opinions about him, whether they'd be good or bad.

Elijah could be just as cruel as Klaus, but as Klaus was loud in a broadcaster type of way, Elijah was silently dreadful.

Finn and Freya were the last ones you encountered. They were both gentle in their own way. As Freya kept up a mask right after breaking her curse, doubtful and distrusting, Finn was overall distasteful towards his own kind. You noticed that between the countless times he attempted to kill his siblings and himself. At first, you held a grudge over the fact that your boyfriend (back then) could never catch a break from his own brother. But eventually you understood Finn's reasons and everything that was left was sympathy. You had trouble adjusting to the vampire life yourself, mostly the drinking blood part but also the eternal life bit as well. Living and dying was something you had never doubted. It was the cycle of life, after all, why would you question it?

Some days, you didn't want it. But those became rare ones as you tasted the sweet flavor of having people that went through the same dilemma by your side. They made everything bearable. You just hoped Finn could also find those people, if not his siblings, then maybe he could find peace somewhere far from them. He had every right of taking some time away if that was his wish.

Family can be suffocating.

Freya had been one of the nicest people you have ever met. Beneath that cold front she built before warming up to the Mikaelsons, there was a tender-hearted woman whom one day you used to call your friend. Freya was there when you crumbled down, she had been the one to help you pull yourself up and she was the one who let you know it was okay to leave if that's what you needed to do. If that's what your heart desires, do it. Her words never left you in some way, you were forever grateful.

Hayley entered your life before she became an honorary Mikaelson – she hated that joke. You helped her find information about her pack when both of you were still back at Mystic Falls. She had been the first person to point out Stefan's interest in you, though you didn't buy it. You actually became closer during her pregnancy. You weren't present in Hope's first months after she was born, but Hayley made sure to send you occasional pictures over the years. You didn't feel so out of the loop thanks to that.

And then, there was Kol.

The epitome of recklessness, wrath and chaos.

He was the a car accident that drove you over a bridge when you couldn't swim and a pillow fort you built overnight to dissipate your nightmares. Kol was the reason why you considered the Mikaelsons to be both the best and worst moment of your life. He was the rollercoaster that fed your desperation for love, displaying a pretty view at the top of the ride, before the crash eventually came and killed all that excitement.

Neither of you expected to fall so fast for one another. Or fall at all.

But he pushed his way into your heart with no permission granted, with his convinced smirks, wild persona and careless nature. He was cold in a warm manner. Tender in the way he held your fingertips with the same bloody hand that also had possession of your heart. And unbelievably good as he cared enough to let you into his heart.

You were too similar for it not to happen, until you were too different to remain together.

Kol Mikaelson conveyed all of the rumors that were spread about him, never once hiding behind a mask, and that's the reason you fell in love with no way back. It had never been an easy choice – choice... that's funny. Does love ever give you a choice? — his enemies became your enemies, you were a target, besides the unstoppable family hassle you always seemed to be involved in. In spite of the obvious reasons, the grounds for breaking up arose from him, surprisingly. Or not so surprisingly. It may have been his way of running away, but it was your way out of the mess he created in your head and heart. According to Hayley, he wasn't left unscathed. He suffered in a way that they had never seen before: through silence.

Kol had never been silent. He craved an audience, which was why he enjoyed discounting his ire on people. He wanted them to fight back in order for him to retaliate much harder. After you left, he didn't murder villages, tortured old enemies or provoked his siblings enough to get a rise out of them. You weren't that surprised once Hayley told you he left as well. What truly left you bewildered was the fact that he didn't cause trouble, turning into a shadow of the wildest Mikaelson people used to hear about.

You couldn't bear to feel guilty. If he wasn't being himself, that was his own doing. He left you first. Looking into the bright side, maybe he had finally mustered the act of growing up.

However, even with the all the heartache he had caused you, loving him was never a regret. You don't know if he felt the same, maybe you'd never know.

Stepping inside the Mikaelson manor made you self-conscious but still nostalgic. You hadn't lived in that house, of course they had built up many other expensive properties over the decade you've been gone. But there is something in the air when the Mikaelsons are around. And it isn't death or blood that you were referring to.

“Are you the friend my mom said was coming to visit us?”

A little girl with dark red hair met you in the entrance of the house. A stuffed bunny dangling from her small hands. You couldn't believe your eyes, but in the meantime you observed her sage green eyes that carry a brush of cinnamon and the tip of her nose, the familiarity practically slapping you in the face.

“I believe so,” you croak out as your lips quirk up in a soft smile. You tell her your name, introducing yourself and say, “and you must be Hope.”

“That's right.“ She gives you a little wave. You nearly leap on your feet at the idea that you're not considered a stranger for her to immediately turn away as parents would advise children. “I'll tell my mom you're here so she can invite you in.”

You nod, leaning on the door, you could feel the spell barely pushing you away. A harsh breeze brush your strands in your face and you roll your eyes at the familiar scent of a hybrid nearby you.

“I have lipstick on, you know how that does not match with hair?“ Two arms engulf you in a strong embrace. You can't help but laugh as your body entwines with Hayley's. “Hay,“ you mumble to her shoulder. “You are kind of ten times stronger than me. Perks of being a hybrid and all...“

“Oh, please. I should be actually crushing you.”

When she cups your cheeks, like a mother would when her child has been gone for too long, you stare at the sage green eyes you had just seen in the entrance. “I missed you too.“ Hayley gives you an eyeroll, letting you go as she asks Hope to let you in. Ah, it made sense. She's not a vampire.

Hope smiles timidly at you as you enter the foyer, her gaze switching to her mother almost pleadingly. Hayley mentions with a tilt of her chin towards the backdoor and Hope quickly rushes away to what you assume is the backyard of the house.

“She's playing hide and seek.“ Hayley clarifies their short interaction, turning to you. “When did you arrive?“

“Today.“ You say, lifting the book to her line of sight. “I told you I kept something that could help.“

“I know,“ she smiles gratefully. Hayley hasn't aged a day since you last met. Of course, she isn't physically able to age at all due to vampirism, but her perpetually concerned gaze was replaced by relaxed shoulders and a proud smile. She has joy written all over her. For the looks of it, motherhood has done her good.

“She's like a mix of you and Klaus.“ You watch the girl running around searching for whoever she's playing with. Hayley takes you to the balcony, the view is pretty that it takes a bit of your breath away. The forest on display is filled with orange and yellow because of the Autumn season. You've always found the sounds of the forest were the perfect noise to live close by.

“So I've heard.” Hayley crosses her arms above the railing, driving her attention to you after pointing somewhere to Hope who's in desperate need of help in the seeking aspect of the game. “How's your life been?” She asks, shifting her whole body towards yours. “New York, huh?”

You nod, imitating her previous position. “Yes. It's a great city.” She remains silent, probably waiting for you to elaborate. It's not like this is a casual visit and the Mikaelsons could be in any corner with their enhanced hearing. Not that you're ashamed of your current life, you just don't feel like yelling from the rooftops.

“That ring is pretty.” Hayley muses when you avoid looking at her. She can see your blush and her eyes soften at that. It's been so long since she has seen you remotely happy, she likes the sight. “You seem happy.” Her squeeze in your shoulder states reassurance. “I hope he doesn't screw up or I'll be coming over with more than just an army.“ A deep groan escapes your throat as your head falls on your forearm.

“You are worse than a whole freaking army.“

“You missed me.“

Shaking your head, your lips twitch in a bitter smile.

“Of course I missed you, Hayley.“ Your smile falls slightly as you see that Hope finally found who she's been looking for in the past half hour.

Kol is coming out from behind a tree and dramatically throwing himself on the grass as Hope's giggles echo around.

“I missed all of you.” Slips out in a whisper.

As soon as Hayley follows your gaze, she picks up the reason for the sudden change in your demeanor. This is what she's been trying to delay.

There's no point now. “He came back at the beginning of this year.” You blink, turning away from the cute scene happening right below you. “Said he missed his niece. I don't know if that's a good thing or not.”

She steps away from the balcony and that's what it takes for you to stop staring at a playful Kol tickling Hope to death.

“Why wouldn't it be a good thing?” You swallow hard, sitting down on one of the loveseats. The ceiling is not bland white as you expected it to be, as you analyse the colors and the shapes, you recognize the famous painting you've been in love with since it was first made.

Van Gogh's Starry Night brings the ceiling alive with the false sensation of movement the circular brush strokes provides.

“He's teaching her magic and she makes some of my stuff disappear for fun. Kol's such a bad influence— Oh.” Hayley's face stretches into a smile upon seeing where you were staring at. “Klaus painted it. This is Hope's bedroom.”

That's when you realize the soft blue on the walls along with colorful drawings clearly made by a child.

“It's beautiful.” You let out in admiration. “God, that bastard is talented.”

Hayley huffed, “Yeah, well, ever since you mention it in that very first Skype call she can't stop talking about it. So he painted it.”

Leaning back on the chair, you glance at her. “That's such a dad thing of him.” She shrugs in silent agreement. “He's not a bad influence,” you utter after the conversation dies down. You're not referring to Klaus. “He loves children, that's just his way of teaching her how to protect herself.” In extreme cases. It's better to teach her to protect herself instead of delaying it when she actually needs it.

Hayley's eyes travel across your features for a while and just as you begin to grow self-conscious of what you said, she flips the topic back to the real issue at hand.

“So, do you usually keep old grimoires in a secret passageway at your apartment or something?”

Your lips raise in amusement, “It's from an old friend. He lent it to me for safekeeping.”

The hybrid's eyes regarded you with suspicion, then she glances down at the book in her hands.

“Should I even be touching that?”

“C'mon,” you say in jest. “My friends aren't that bad.”

“I am not that bad. The Mikaelsons are certainly debatable and if I can recall someone called Katherine Pierce who was also considered your friend — who I still doubt that it was all that she was — then we need to discuss what you mean by not that bad.”

“Should I mention Tyler dogbreath Lockwood, Hayley? He was a nuisance!” You throw back in a complete mature way. “I can't believe you would voluntarily hold a conversation with the guy.”

Hayley snickers, “He wasn't as bad as you make him out to be.”

“You're right,“ you nod. “He was worse.“

Hayley hums, quietly analyzing the grimoire with what you can tell is interest that leads to boredom. She closes it in a thud and stands up. “I'll have to give this to Davina.“

You frown in confusion, following her out of the room. “The Claire witch? You're trusting that teenager with the life of my niece?” Your tone raises in light disbelief as Hayley descends the stairs completely unbothered by your accusation. “Where is Freya? Where is everyone— You can't possibly be serious, Hayley.”

“Freya is generously taking an early flight back to Virginia as we speak, cutting her honeymoon short. She was the one who requested Davina to be put to use in this task, if I can recall.” You knew it was Elijah before you saw his impeccable suit, merely because of his eloquence. He offers you a smile as you reach the living room. “Welcome back.” You're amused by the way he ignores your attempt at handshaking to lay a kiss on the back of your hand. He's always done that, it's no surprise. That's an Elijah thing to do. His eyes fall on your left hand. “And congratulations on your engagement. I've heard.”

You give him a close lipped smile in return, withdrawing your hand to cross your arms.

“Yes, it seems that everyone has.”

“You know, the term being put to use might not be taken as a good thing to every person.” The voice behind you causes your body to freeze. “Hello, stranger.”

Elijah is gone with the wind before you can notice and Hayley, who seems to have ventured off somewhere, still isn't back.

“She's not a stranger, Uncle Kol.” Hearing Hope's voice as you turn around is a form of relief, you admit. She's smiling kindly at you from her Uncle Kol's shoulders. “That's mom's friend. Remember, the one she told us was coming over?“

Kol acts fascinated. “That is true, Hope. Thank you for reminding me.”

She giggled, mouthing out to you above his head “Forgetful.”

You crack a smile at that. Mikaelson humor.

It doesn't take long for Hope to get tired of your attention and scurry away to her bedroom. And then, there were two.

How do you greet someone who broke your heart but still has a part of it with them?

“You look beautiful.”

You can affirm something: do not start like that.

“Thank you.“ You reply shortly. The stairs are right there, you could literally take a step back and you'd be on your way to the first floor. Still, you remain in the same place.

You had yet to look him in the eye since he entered the living room. That doesn't happen until he stops right in front of you.

The first thing you notice about Kol was his voice. Centuries back, when you first met, he had said your name before you even acknowledged his family. It slipped out of his tongue; honey mixed with pepper. A strange mixture that ends up being perfect once you taste.

Saying someone's name is like holding a secret beneath your tongue. You have the power to reveal it, you can pronounce it and you can choose to savour it to yourself. The taste is not made for everyone, it is reserved for you and you only. And he had that power from the first moment he called out your name.

“How's married life going?“

Your head tilts in confusion as his eyes are cast downwards. A scowl turns your lips into a frown. Just like that, the peaceful haze is over.

“Not married,” you say through gritted-teeth, turning away from him and from the flight of stairs. You want to get out of this house. If someone else asks about anything related to marriage again you'd probably snap.

“Yet, right?”

“That's what engagements work for, have you not had your fair share of those to understand that?” He has followed you outside and is faster than you since he's currently leaning with his body on your car door. Arms crossed and a side smile.

You hated to know what that meant. You hated that you knew him at all.

“Can you move?“ You snap, eyes narrowing. Kol hums softly as if he's considering your request. Dick. “Okay, I'll walk then.”

The defeated sigh you heard as you turn your back on him is almost a reason to make you relieved. But your arm was pulled back and that cold touch just made your whole body halt instantly.

❝ but I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain... ❞

“Can you stop being stubborn for a second?” He exclaims, kicking the car door shut as he walked with heavy steps towards you.

The rain softly paints the car windows with its tears. You forced him to step on the breaks so you could get out of the vehicle because of how mad you were. You couldn't remember the reason for the fight, but it happened and you didn't want to be around him.

“It's going to rain.”

You scoff, “I'm not made of sugar. I can handle a little rain.”

The thunder rolls in the sky, causing you to flinch slightly. A cold hand grabs your wrist.

“You'd rather walk in a thunderstorm than argue with me, is it?” Kol shrugs off his jacket with a scowl, covering your shoulder with it in a swift movement, one he had done many times before. “Real mature, love.” He shoves the car keys into your hand.

“What—”

“Take the car.” He had sped off before you could ask him to go to hell. Because no. You wouldn't take his car and leave him in a freaking thunderstorm. But he decided that just like he decided to put an end to your relationship.

“Stay.“ He says, drawing his hand back with hesitance. That quickly brought you back to the present. “I didn't mean to upset you. I'm sorry.” That's one of the rarest moments you've heard him apologize, it didn't used to be something in his vocabulary.

“I'll just wait for Freya at the hotel. It's not like we can start the spell before she's here.” You clear your throat, a bit taken aback by his presence still. You feel so silly.

Kol nods thoughtfully, taking a step back from you as if you aren't allowed to be too close. “Okay.” And before you can enter your car and drive off, your ears are still very much in tune with his voice even if he's all the way inside the house. “It's good to see you again.”

You're not sure if you share the same feeling.

━━━━━

“This is from the Gemini coven.”

You turn away from Davina's chanting to stare at Freya's impassive stance. She always kept that façade while doing magic.

“And what of it?“ Freya gives you a sideways glance as you roll your eyes, leaning back on the wall as the Witch finishes up the spell and mutters something to Hayley. Freya has done her part and for some reason they needed another set of hands. You don't question it. “Don't fret. There'll be no retaliation.”

“Good, because we don't need a crazy siphoner touring around New Orleans.”

You crack a chuckle, brushing your hair behind your ear. “The grimoire is technically mine.” Freya's eyes narrow suspiciously at your claim. “What? It is. It was a gift.”

“Kai Parker gave you a gift?” She regards you with disbelief. You shrug in response, it's the truth. It's not like you were capable of stealing something from Malachai Parker and leave unscathed. He is a tiny bit insane and you aren't special.

“She has a thing for K's, doesn't she?” You flinch at the breath in your neck. It earns Rebekah a glare as she walks around the pillar you were leaning on, her smirk takes her whole face, granting mischief in her blue eyes.

“We're done.”

You cut off your jab towards Rebekah when Davina's voice reaches your attention.

“Just like that?”

Freya gives you another one of her warning looks but you are facing the Claire Witch with a hard gaze. You didn't trust her then and you wouldn't trust her now. And it has nothing to do with her age nor the lack of experience in the magic department — or life, in general — it was more of a grudge you held for the girl ever since she messed with your family. You recalled quite well how she had weakened the Mikaelsons and played a part in Marcel's stupid plan to destroy all of them. Almost. You hated both of them with your every being. No matter how Klaus may have forgiven Marcel for it or how Hayley claims that Davina was manipulated.

“We did everything that was in the grimoire. She's safe.” Her voice carries defiance and you could certainly enjoy the opportunity to play into her attitude.

A low hum left your lips and you hear someone sigh around the room, you couldn't concentrate enough to name who it was but you have a guess.

“Okay. That's great.” You utter, mouth widening into a satisfied grin. You like the way she regards you with caution as you stride over. “You're gonna need that?” You ask in a whisper, pointing towards the book in her small hands. She hands it over to you, you take it slowly, mumbling a thank you and offering a sickly sweet smile. Your distaste is a mutual feeling, you're glad to know.

The entire family heads back to the Mikaelson manor. Despite Rebekah's pestering for you to go with them, you manage to escape for some alone time.

Rousseau's is where you end up after walking aimlessly through the city. Some things have changed. There are a few new musicians playing in the corners of the streets, but those familiar faces still there as well. The streets are illuminated by the lampposts scattered around the French Quarter, the shadows of the streetlights dancing at your feet remind you of times where you'd feel happiness holding you together. The bittersweet moment is interrupted by something soft tickling your ankle, causing you to jump in surprise. Quite literally.

“Never seen a cat before?” Someone mocks your tense stance as you watch the feline exit the bar.

You would have snapped their neck if the sweet smile of Camille O'Connell didn't reach your eyes right away. She's drying up glasses on the counter, probably getting ready to close the establishment, it was around the time she usually did.

“Can you spare this poor soul a bit of alcohol?”

“I'll never get used to that,” Camille says, shaking her head and the sound of titling metal made your face stretch into a grin. “You're not old enough to drink.” She starts preparing your favourite drink. Alcohol isn't your favourite thing in the world, but Cami's drinks are sweet enough to appease your taste buds. You didn't spend hours wallowing in this bar with nothing to accompany you — the alcohol and Camille's ears to listen to your misery.

Your nose wrinkles. “I am over 400 years old, Cami. How many times have we been over this?”

She tsked, curling her lower lip, throwing the cloth on her shoulder as she leans on the bar top.

“You look like seventeen.”

“That's flattering?” You muse, sipping your blue beverage. “I can't even remember what my seventeens were like.” That last part you mumbled to yourself.

“At what age did you turn?” Her voice is sad and you start grieving the fun of the moment.

Taping your nails against the wood distractedly, you work on pulling the terrifying moment from the abyss of your mind. Camille's gaze trails over your features in her own curiosity.

“It's been a while, huh?” She felt the need to change the subject. That made you crack a smile. Did she think she had genuinely upset you?

“Ten years or so.”

“Yes.” She says pointedly. “What brings you back?” She finally finishes cleaning up and you realise you're probably delaying her sleep schedule, but she hasn't complain about your overstay and you don't mention it.

You decide on telling her the truth. “Family stuff.” The partial truth, that is. “I died in 1603,” you refer to her previous question. Her eyes nearly pop out of her head. “I had recently entered my twenties. Can say now that I never got out of it.”

She didn't laugh at your joke, but you did.

“I'm sorry. Do you still...”

“Remember it?”

“Yes.”

You shrug nonchalantly. “It was a life changing event. So, yeah. I do remember it. But it doesn't make me feel anything anymore. It's something I no longer care about.” That's the truth. The memory doesn't affect you as much as it used to.

Cami nod, a strand of her hair slipping from behind her ear. She brushes it back and you tilt your head at the bracelet in her wrist. Once that has been there ever since you first visited Rousseau's.

“You still wear it.” You point out. She frowns confused, but her gaze follows where your attention lays and she hums.

“Yes. Can't have myself walking around the zoo with no defense.”

“The zoo—” you can't suppress the snort that comes out of you. “I can't believe you just said that.”

“I did.” Camille puts her hand on your shoulder and you deflect lightly. Guess it's time to leave. “I'm closing up. It's almost 1 am.”

“Sorry, Cami.” You shouldn't have bothered her that much. “Can I walk you home?”

It's her turn to chuckle. She locks up the bar and spins around to face you, a knowing glint in her bright blue eyes. You don't like that look. It kind of reminds you of Caroline when she knows something about yourself that you don't. Or that you just don't want to admit yet.

You miss her too.

“Are you really that desperate to avoid your problems?” You gape at her. “C'mon. Did you actually come here so I could make you a Grasshopper?” Oh, so that is the name of the drink you've had since forever. Good to know.

“I wanted some company.” You confess, rolling your eyes as she waits for you to follow her steps. Half the truth, again. This was the best place to avoid your problems — one problem. “Is that such a crime?”

“You sound like Klaus.”

“Stop offending me or I'll kill you.”

“Go ahead. I'm sure you'll like it when my blood burns your throat from how much vervain I've been taking.”

Your lips quirk up in a lopsided grin.

“I'm just going to say something, feel free to ignore it.” Cami announces as you crossed the street. You've arrived at her apartment. When you stop in front of the entrance and she turns her full body to you, her face has lost all the merriment. “I don't know why you are back. I don't even know the entire reason why you left so suddenly.” That makes you grow tense. “But that's none of my business. What I want to say is that, don't allow what let you down get to you again. If you think that getting out of here, taking some space to yourself, was good, then so be it. It's your life, okay? You deserve to be happy.”

You stand quiet for a while, absorbing everything she had said.

“I am.” You say quietly. “I am happy.” Away from here.

She smiles down at you, then, surprisingly, pulls you into a hug. Cami and you have never been close. You just listened to each other's complaints in the midst of the bar's loudness. You grew to have a bond but it was nothing as tight-knit as what you had with Freya or Hayley. Although, you did miss Cami while you were gone. She was the only one who knew how to make a good Grasshopper, anyway.

“Stop by the bar before you take off god-knows-where again.” She requests after you split apart.

“I'll think about it.” You bury your hands on your jacket with a smile as she bids you goodbye.

The city is never completely quiet. There's local music playing in some corners still at that time of the day. You realise you have reached Jackson Square when you put a pause on your walk, listening and breathing into New Orleans. Even the smell is different, maybe it is the lack of tragedy in the streets. You hope it carries on that way, Hope deserves to live peacefully. Or as peaceful as Hayley Marshall's and Klaus Mikaelson's daughter can live.

“Can you step out of there? It's getting ridiculous.” A woman crossing the street gives you an ugly look and you couldn't care less. You were talking to the Edward Cullen beside the tree a few feet back from where you stand. “How long have you been following me like a creepy stalker?”

“I've just arrived.” Kol says. You can see him rolling his eyes without taking a look at him. “And I wasn't following you.”

“Oh,” you blink innocently at him. “Sorry. I didn't know you had become such a religious man over the course of ten years.”

St. Louis Cathedral has all of its lights off, which means it's closed for the night. It's not like you wanted to enter the church in the first place, you just thought it looked pretty this time of the night. You'd frequent that area a lot to read a book when you were bored. Kol never shared that particular interest.

❝ and It's 2 a.m. and I'm cursing your name...❞

“This paranoia between you and Klaus is getting out of hand.” You mention to him one night as he turned your room upside down looking for something he would not inform you about. “You better put all of that back because I will not.” You say with a shake of your head, frustrated.

“He has the dagger. I have nothing to protect myself with.”

“So run away again. It's what you do best.” You let out. Only realising what you had done after it slips past your lips. The room is quiet, the silence deafening to the point where you flinch at the sound of creaking wood.

It wasn't the bed. It wasn't the wardrobe. When you glimpse at the door, hesitantly, it has been left ajar.

He did what you asked.

You remember inhaling deeply before throwing a jacket over your shoulder and grabbing the book of the week to read at Jackson Square, viewing the passerby's that would enter and exit St. Louis Cathedral.

“You'd come here and sit on that bench right over there with a new book every week.”

Your chest latches onto unwanted nostalgia you should desperately trying to get rid of. It makes your arms go numb and a cold shiver run down your spine. You blink at him. You knew?

“What?” You grunt, slightly disoriented.

Kol seems lost in his head, much like you were a few seconds ago, but he has a bigger grasp on reality than you do. “I thought it was more of something out of spite that you did. Sit in front of a church. Watch people leave. Choose a prey and feed on them to make them somehow question their faith.”

Furrowing your brows in thought, you consider out loud, “You thought that I'd come here to prove a point?”

He shrugs. The repetitive kicking of rocks tells you he is more nervous than he's letting on. Kol could mask his feelings well, his first choice of emotion would be anger and he'd just about use it to everything and everyone.

Over the years you'd notice some tells beneath all that rage. There was resentment and there was sadness. And now you can see guilt. You wonder if you're simply imagining something you want to see instead of what's actually there.

“What are you doing here, Kol?”

You're tired. You're beginning to think that Stefan was right and you should have evaluated the pros and cons of being in this fucking city before choosing the first flight five minutes after Rebekah's text.

“I missed you.”

“No.” You ignore the way you want to run away at what feels like sincerity coming out of his mouth. “What are you really doing here?”

His lips twitch and you think that familiar smirk will appear, but it doesn't. Just a sad smile.

“I missed you.” He repeats firmly as if not to let it hang in the air enough for confusion. There is no dubious meaning. He is not playing a game. “I haven't had a chance to say that when you were here.”

You take your time surveying his features. He had cut his hair, but you noticed that when he was playing with Hope in the backyard. His style is still the same, the moles still in the same spots around his cheeks and neck, his cupid's bow hasn't changed either. Kol's physique barely suffered any alterations, but he is different. Suddenly, you remember Hayley and the new spark in her eyes.

They both mirror people who have let go of their demons. The ones who scratch your skin and sink into your shoulders claiming your body as well as your mind as theirs. It is impossible to escape all of them at once, but time makes it bearable to live with some as you learn to let go of others.

“What do you mean?” You sit at edge of a bench. Not the one you used to sit almost every week. That would be too much. He understands the space left is for him to occupy after a moment. “That you haven't had the chance to say it when I was here. Why would you miss me while I was here?”

You know exactly why. You felt that all the time with him. Most of the time you dated a shadow in place of the man you loved and it is sad that, at some point, you got used to it.

“Because I wasn't. I wasn't here when I should have been and you were gone before I could help it.” A wave of regret travels across his features and you turn away before your gazes can meet. “And yes, I have no right of saying that after—after—”

“Ten years?”

“... ten years.” You complete at the same time. “I lost your trust. I lost you. Which is something that I'll never forgive myself for. I just... I just need you to know—”

“Don't.”

He furrowed his eyebrows as you stood up, running a hand through your face in pure... frustration? Anger? Fear? Yes. Fear. He is being unpredictable. Kol Mikaelson is unpredictable, it's one of the many traits of his you spend a long time admiring, until it became a burden in your relationship.

But after ten years you had no idea how to deal with this and you don't want to deal with it. Not now. Not after you and him were over.

He says your name almost pleadingly.

“Kol, don't.” You cut him off. “You can't do this now. You just can't.” You flinch away when he tries to touch you as a form of comfort. You didn't want that comfort. Not from him. Not anymore.

His eyes soften and there's hurt in them but you can't do this now. It's not fair. “I'm not trying to do anything.”

“Yes, you are!” You croak out, slightly shaken up. “Whatever you have to say doesn't make a difference now.”

You see his jaw clench slightly. Good. You want him to be angry. At least this side of him you can handle because you'll attack just as hard.

“I'm sorry.”

Your eyes snap to him. “I'm sorry.” Kol repeats, walking towards you with much more certainty. “I was a coward, immature and just overall selfish. I shouldn't have left, but I did and that doesn't change the past, but, but I loved you. I truly did. If I could go back—”

“You can't.” Your lower lip curl between your teeth. You can't take anything back. You can't undo the past. “You can't make it better, Kol.” You say, attempting to hold your self together in front of the boy who broke your heart into pieces. You still haven't found all of them yet, they were scattered, some beyond repair. “I was a mess without you. Do you know how long it took for me to pick myself back up?”

“You shouldn't have left.” You harshly clean a tear that travels down your cheek. “If you hadn't, if you had given me a chance to, to be there for you, then, yes, it would all be different. Trust me. It would. But because of what you did, it's not.” Admitting that to yourself took too long and it was the hardest thing you had to do, but admitting that to him? No. It felt freeing. It felt liberating. It felt fair.

There was a point in which all you could think about was making him suffer the way you did. Because he deserved it. How can someone claim to love you so deeply and then vanish from your life?

However, it isn't really the anger that prevails as he stands in front of you at Jackson Square, trying to apologize for years of pain that he had caused. As soon as you spill your heart out, the only thing left is sadness and nostalgia. You miss the screaming and fighting. You miss his stupid obsession with magic. You miss his sincerity, because till this day, no one would throw the truth in your face like Kol did. You miss the excitement. You miss his insanity. You miss him.

Loving Kol Mikaelson had not been easy. Still, you wouldn't go back on your choice if you had the chance. Because loving him had been a choice, one you've made for nearly five decades. And letting him go had driven you to the edge and brought you back to life.

Yes, you miss him. But it's not strange the fact that, deep down, you'll always miss someone you fell in love with. Even if they didn't carried your heart as carefully as you deserved. They were still part of you. Maybe, they always would be.

“I know.” He says, voice rough. You'd barely hear him if you didn't have enhanced hearing. “I regret it every single day of my life.” His eyes follow as you lean back in the bench. You're sitting in opposite ones. He stares at you as if you're a wounded animal, afraid to approach. His red-rimmed eyes make your heart clench.

You think about how funny it is that your body can react the same to a person. As if they're permanently marked into your soul.

Kol had never said what you wanted to hear. The truth was the only thing that escaped from his lips, even if it would absolutely crush you.

He was real and he pulled you back from the edge many times before. Even if he had been the one pushing you over that same edge afterwards.

This truth is crushing you. But it is a pain you must feel in order to fully move on.

You exhale slowly. “I know you do.” You can see the clear regret in his eyes. It's sipping through his soul and it may have eaten some part of him during these years. You don't feel okay with that. Strangely as that may be, you don't wish his suffering.

“Do you?” He lets out faintly, uncertain. “I'm not— I am not saying any of that with cruel intentions. I never meant to hurt you. I love you, but,”

“... but it wasn't enough to make you stay.” You swallowed with difficulty.

“No.” You glance up at him, something in your chest shatters. You don't know if his honesty is something you crave now. “I miss you. I never stopped missing you, no matter how hard I tried. And I, I don't know how to change that.”

“You can't.” You say, feeling like you can breathe properly after such a long time. “Because I miss you too, Kol.” and I love you. Not the same way, but I do. “It's not something we can change, it's just there. Maybe time will somehow make it better.”

“Really?” The hope in his voice grips you tight. That desperation to move on. To forget. You relate to that so much. “Is that what you think? Sounds too human to come from you.”

You let out a scoff, throwing your head back. “What does that even mean, Mikaelson?”

His deep chuckle brings a small smile out of you.

“Time is necessary for everyone.” You watch him quietly. He has the same tell from before; when his head is full, he plays with the ring in his index finger. Whenever he did that, you'd curl your fingers around his shoulder and squeeze it, he'd relax under your touch.

You would miss that. But you can live without it. You can live without him just as he can live without you. You know it's for the better.

It's almost four in the morning when you arrive back in the hotel. The first thing you do is take a shower, then throw yourself in bed pretending it is the one in your bedroom at your home. Soft and with your favorite pillows. Not the real scratchy and thin bedding you currently have.

It doesn't work, so you dial the familiar number in your phone to actually hear home from the line.

“I'm sorry to be dumping this on you.”

“You're dumping nothing on me.“ Stefan retorts and you can clearly see him shaking his head. “Hey, you handled Ripper-me, if I can't handle you talking about your ex then what does that say about me?“

You stare at the ceiling, “Ripper-you wasn't that terrifying.“ You mock him, earning a snicker that makes your entire being warm.

“I'm certain some people would disagree a little bit.”

“Eh,” You shrug, kicking the comfort off of your legs. “Nothing I can't handle, baby.”

When his chuckles dies down, his tone comes back slightly serious and you pick up on the tinge of concern in it. Same as the day before.

You've unleashed your still-fresh wounds to Stefan a few minutes back. There's no one else you wanted to talk to after everything that's happened. You needed safety, you needed someone to ground you, to stop you from spiraling out of control. Stefan always does that.

He doesn't question too much nor does he judge the situation. He must have expected something like that would end up happening. Part of you wishes he would yell at you, telling you that he had been right and you should have listened to him from the start. Instead, he just listens.

Stefan understands that just as it's Kol, for you. It's Elena, for him. And there's nothing none of you can do about it.

“You can always come to me for anything,” he breaks the silence. “I'm here, I'm not going anywhere.”

Inhaling sharply, fiddling with your engagement ring, you ask, “Why?”

Why aren't you running away? Why do you want to deal with me for the rest of your life?

“Because I love you. And I'm not only here for the good times but also the bad times. I'm here for the ugly truth and I'll still be here for the worst part.” Your breathing is labored at this point. You refrain from telling him you don't deserve it. You don't deserve that he stays. You don't deserve that he's still here after everything. But it's his choice and he's choosing to love you with your baggage.

“For better and for worse. In sickness and in health, right?”

The snort that escapes you is nothing but awful. “You're an idiot.“ You shake your head, pressing the phone closer to your ear as if that would make him closer to you.

You can practically see his smirk through the phone. “But I'm your idiot.” He seems to ponder over your silence. “Ugh, that was cheesy, wasn't it?”

“Yes,” you confirm, biting your lip to avoid a stupid grin. “don't do that ever again.” You order, knowing he will most certainly do it more than ten times. Because that is how Stefan is like. He tells you bad jokes in bad moments to make you feel better, he keeps you company through a phone call for how long you need comfort for and he's the one that makes you feel perfectly fine at the end of the day.

“Please don't break-up with me, we're almost getting married.”

“I'll consider this plea.”

The conversation ends up reaching something lighter when he asks about Hope and Hayley. You tell him about Hope and how bright she is, you detail the tiny differences of New Orleans from before and now and you confess you miss him. Because you do.

In the end, this trip was good. It unfolded a part of your story that had been buried down in a drawer for a long time. You needed closure and you had it tonight. It's bittersweet and it's nostalgic and it's sad but it is necessary.

Which is why you no longer have doubts about your future. Everything seems perfectly clear now that you've confronted your past, the monsters do not look so big anymore.

“I love you,” he says. The line had gone silent for a while as both of you seem to be thinking over to yourselves.

His hoarse voice and clipped tone tells you that he's as affected by this trip as you are. You want to comfort him, saying that there's nothing you need to worry about, I'll come back, I'll always return to you. But none of that will get through his brain until your face to face, finally in each other's arms.

And something that you've come to see through a new perspective is that love isn't tiring, it isn't heavy nor it is draining. Love is strength, calmness and security. Love can be fire, kissing in the rain and a rollercoaster of emotions. But it's not bad and it's not rotten. It can, however, sometimes be doubtful. It can raise questions that can make you halt on your way to say yes, but that's okay. Because even though you're certain, you're allowed to not have all the answers and you're allowed to not be alone to search for them.

“I love you, too,” you breathe out, shutting your eyes to imagine you were close to him, in your safe place.

“It's so good to know that you're smiling right now.”

You let out a scoff, shaking your head but your mouth is quirking up in the sides. “Seriously, you've gotta stop doing that, Stef. Am I feeding your ego?” You don't wait for a response. “Don't answer that, I know I am.”

“Come home.”

Because no matter how much you occasionally missed your past, your present and future are greater than anything else you could have possibly desired.

❝ and that's the way I loved you...❞

“I will.”

You couldn't have asked for anything better.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

[alternate ending]

#the originals fanfiction #the originals imagine #kol mikaelson x reader #stefan salvatore x reader #tvd imagine #the vampire diaries fanfic #tvd fanfiction #the originals fic #inspired by the way i loved you #stefan salvatore imagine #stefan salvatore fanfiction

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yourtoradorasextendedwarranty · 9 months

Text

Fine I'll Bite

So I'm beyond the scope of normal anger here. Media has been on a crusade as of late to more or less make it out like child sex trafficking ISN'T happening and if it is, is only happening a TINY BIT. First of all. FUCK YOU. I'm not going to be calm here. The people CNN, MSNBC, ABC etc have had on to talk about this have been Prostasia supporters, and spokes people for fucking NAMBLA. Actual pedophiles are the people saying this movie is "over hyped" and " is fear mongering".

youtube

WHEN for all intents and purposes it's fully based on a true events, with very little changed for artistic posture. Which is why the movie was not a action adventure thriller with huge gun fights and explosions. Then we have THIS pos, and look, I don't know you but to you, fuck you.

And I'm not going to hide your name. You deserve to be looked into. "I always knew millions of people that were against child sex trafficking were fishy" Sure you did. Because it's impossible that there are not a few people donating to a movie being made that maybe aren't the best people.

Here's the kicker. Yahoo New, citing Newsweek both know what they were doing when they did this:

Yahoo News *Though the top header reads Jezebel so I'm a bit confused and concerned.

Newsweek

Now what do both of these have in common? Well when you first click on the Newsweek article it starts with the mug shot. Because regardless of the mans name, (and I don't personally know his nationality) He looks white. The media loves this. They want this. Because they know it stokes division. But what is the other thing they did? The headline. "Funder" is the word they used. And while Yahoo specifically goes out of their way to NOT mention the thousands of other crowd funders. News week at least had the decency to put it in the first paragraph. Though I am still pissed at the intentional slant here with the headline.

Now if you read the Newsweek article they don't give us much of anything. More or less not even telling us what exactly he's being charged for specifically as no information about the case exists it seems. At least not that Newsweek can verify also saying that he had direct involvement in the film somehow but then they go on to say this

So some credit again to Newsweek though they frankly don't deserve it.

My issue with both of these headlines is that it leads you into this idea that the movie got it's primary funding from this one guy. And the intent with that is to implicate the entire film as being a catfish. Why? I can tell you why. Because most of the mainstream left have sided with actual pedophiles and can't renounce them because if they do, they think the LGBT will revolt against them. Which is honestly disgusting because, let's suppose for a second, I as a moderate on the left, would believe that the LGBT would be mad if you called out pedophiles. What is the implication in that? Is it that you are saying that the LGBT ARE or are complacent in pedophilia? Because that sounds pretty fucking homophobic to me. Or is it that you don't want to risk alienating a voter base who seems to more and more align with you? At least the outspoken ones anyways.

I can't even express, as a victim of CSA myself how angry this topic makes me. THERE ARE legit avowed pedophiles trashing this movie, and ONE DONER out of 1000's does something f'd up that we have ZERO context on, and all of a sudden it's a win to prove the movie or the people as a WHOLE that support it are a problem.

I don't know how to tell you this. Hell I don't know how to force this down your throat. The movie. WAS. BASED. ON. REAL. EVENTS! And the telling of that story as well as actual news footage, shows there is a HUGE issue with child abductions and child sex trafficking. And saying that it's fear mongering, or that we shouldn't put that much worry on it REALLY makes it feel like you have something to hide.

And again. I can not even BEGIN to express how pissed off this makes me. I really can't. No one has any real reason to shit on this movie unless they have something to hide. No one has any real reason to shit on the movies message unless they have something to hide. Because the movie was based again on REAL LIFE. So either one you want people to not focus on this as a problem because you are a part of that problem. Or because you are mad that a large swath of the political middle and right have come out in support of it, but the neo liberal left has been mostly silent about it. And more the media has been propping up NAMBLA types to talk about why this movie "is just qanon fear mongering". If I could have a heart attack from sheer rage, I'd have had one having read that.

I've done my best to not lose my utter shit when dealing with the a-holes in the media trying to make this movie seem bad, and not worth paying attention to. And little by little I'm losing my patience. And I can't not be emotion driven on this because I'VE BEEN assaulted as a kid. I do my best to bury it every single fucking day and you're going to tell ME it's not that big a deal? Your going to tell ME that people supporting a movie based heavily on a true story is "Fishy". I don't support violence at all in 98%-99% of cases. For you, I'd make an exception. For the people at Yahoo(and or Jezebel) that wrote this, I'd make an exception. For the people that decided on that headline at Newsweek, I'd make an exception.

And for context, the Yahoo one is GOD AWFUL. And intentionally inflammatory. I will not link that here because they don't deserve the traffic. However I'll link the Newsweek one here so people can look at what a non story this bullshit is.

Newsweek Article

#discourse #yahoo news #rage #Youtube

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otaku553 · 4 months

Note

I recall you mentioning once that you worked in a lab, do u have any advice for getting to that point? I want (read: NEED) to work or intern at a lab but I don’t rlly know what to ask the ppl running them lol

If I can help I'd be glad to!! Full disclaimer though, I am an undergrad junior and I go to school at a pretty reputable research institution so I may not be that much help because I've been pretty lucky and privileged to have direct access to many opportunities. If you're not a high schooler or undergrad student, my advice might not even apply to you at all. This got quite long, so I'll put this under a read more. If you have any more questions, feel free to dm me!

I don't know what your research interests are or what level of schooling you're at so I'll try my best to be broad. You're right that it's best to directly ask the person running the lab, the principal investigator (PI). Even if there's an official application process for fellowships or summer research grants or programs, usually already having reached out to a mentor is either a requirement or strongly encouraged. This applies for both university labs and I think rseearch agency labs like NIH, though I will say, a lot more of my advice will apply to labs at universities.

Understandably, though, it's really difficult to write that email, and quite disheartening that usually you'll need to write multiple emails to different PIs before even getting a reply back. One way to deal with this is to find a template online to copy, because word for word these emails usually go

"Hello [so and so], My name is [so and so] and I'm [brief introduction]. I'm interested in [what research this lab does] and was wondering if you have any positions available in your lab for [period you want to do internship during]. If you need them, my resume and transcript are attached. Thank you for your time."

You can delve into more specifcs in the body but it doesn't need to be long-- I think PIs tend to be quite busy, so being concise and direct is good, as long as you're genuine about what you're interested in. It doesn't need to be an essay or multiple paragraphs or anything! I find that usually 3-4 sentences suffices. If they want to know more, they'll usually ask to meet to talk about what you're interested in.

(On a side note, my roommate has an excellent strategy for dealing with anxiety when sending an email where you recite "fuck it we ball fuck it we ball fuck it we ball" while clicking send lmao)

Now, more specifically, if you're already attending a college that has labs, and professors who are PIs of those labs, it can be useful to take a class that the PI teaches and email either while taking the class or after the class and say "this class was very interesting and i was hoping to explore [so and so] further. Do you have any openings in your lab etc." If you don't have the time to do this, just cold-emailing the lab is usually fine too, but it's good to cite a connection I think? Also keep an eye out for any presentations or seminars that might be given by grad students or professors, since going to those can be a good way to express interest.

If you're a high schooler, you won't have the immediate connection, but I think most researchers would be impressed with the initiative to reach out and have no reason to refuse help. You might have a harder time finding a paid internship as a high schooler, but even with volunteering you can definitely get a foot into the door with research experience. I think a good way to start for high schoolers is looking into local university labs and expressing an interest in their work? Or reaching out to alumni of your school to ask for general advice and or opportunities.

If you don't receive an email back, you can send a follow up in two or three days. Sometimes emails can get pushed to the bottom of the inbox before they're seen, and it's no harm to just bump it again, with a little "hello! I wasn't sure if you'd seen this email. I'd like to follow up on this." (historically, I have been very bad at this, ahha). If you receive a negative response (which is pretty unlikely I think?) you can still thank them for their time and ask for advice regarding getting into research for their field of specialty.

I hope this helps! If you have any more questions, please feel free to ask or dm me. I will try my best to be helpful :)

#again huge disclaimer take my advice with a grain of salt i am just an undergrad #unrelated to the ask but i kind of wonder if anyone can guess what college i go to. i think ive dropped a few hints before lmao #but yeah.... research can be difficult to get into #i now have about three (?) years of research experience i think and i still get really anxious when trying to send out emails #the sooner the better with these kinds of things though

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olderthannetfic · 4 months

Note

Hello, and a belated happy new year to you. Sorry to bother you like that, but I have a question regarding tagging for character on AO3.

I am a relatively new user, with a couple of fics to my name in the archive, but the current one that I am writing and intend to publish, I am not sure how to tag it in regards to a specific portion of it.

What I mean is, I used quotes from an in-show character who does not appear in the fic itself, and it's not that I am quoting them in a way that would require a "character (mentioned)" tag, like this would: protagonist remembered supporting character saying 'example quote' all those years ago

It's more like floating quotes in between the paragraphs, to kind of show that while the protagonist is remembering the words of the other character, the quotes are also meant to set the atmosphere for the reader as well. For example: "Protagonist stands on the balcony, overlooking the city, glass of whisky in hand.

...floating quote...

Protagonist empties the glass in one go and sets it down on the stone ledge harsh enough to crack it, turns and goes back inside."

Also, the quote I chose is iconic enough that, I think the readers would be able to recognise on their own who said those words.

Should I go with the "character (mentioned)" tag just to be safe, or is it not necessary to tag for the chracter that I am quoting at all, because they don't really appear at all, not even in a flashback?

Again, sorry to bother you with this! I have been agonising over this more than about actually writing the fic, and I don't know who else to ask.

I never tag for characters being mentioned. I don't even tag for most side characters.

I think this style of tagging sucks on AO3, actually.

I tag for what the fic is about. If it's about a ship, I may not even tag the character tags for those people, just the ship tag. If it's about a particular trope, I'll tag for that.

I do not tag to warn people "Contains traces of nuts", just "Walnut-flavored cookies".

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