#I wonder how many pages I should build up before I release

[michelleleewise]

Worthy

Pairing: Dark!Thor x female reader

Warnings: nothing too bad in this one, creepiness, swearing, mentions of cheating, toxic relationship, sadness, mild depression, anxiety, therapy and counseling, smut at the end (not graphic), if i missed something please let me know. things will progress as we go, please heed the warnings)

Summary: After leaving a toxic relationship, you take the advice of a friend and seek help.....

A/n: This my very first dark anything, as well as Thor, be gentle with me lol im making this a small series for my lovely friend @springdandelixn 💙 like I mentioned it will progress....keep your flashlights handy..... love you guys!!!!

Part One-

You scroll further down the page, unsure what exactly your looking for....someone to listen....someone who won't judge you. You sigh, you friend Maya's words echoing through your head "you need to talk to someone, this isn't healthy to bottle everything up." She had said over coffee "I am, I'm talkng to you." You laughed seeing her shake her head "a professional y/n." She said sternly making you frown. And here you were, scrolling the endless pages of the internet in search of a "professional."

You sighed again, your thumb sliding across the screen on your phone when it caught your eye "Odinison Health and Rehabilitation." You aren't sure what possessed you as you pressed your thumb to the name, their website popping up as you scrolled down seeing their services, counseling being among the many. "Hmm, this might work." You said to yourself, your thumb hovering over the number. You had always told yourself counseling was a joke, a ploy for doctors to get money from the weak..but everything you had been through the last year......

You quicky dialed the number before you changed your mind, your heart racing more with each ring when a lady picked up "Odinson Health, how may I help you." She asked. "Umm...hi, I was...well you see I saw your website.." you trailed off trying to get your thoughts together "were you interested in one of our services ma'am?" She asked a little too politely "uuhh yes....counseling?" You asked, dragging your nails across the table "yes, we have a few different counselors but I would highly recommend one of the owners." She said, you could hear her smile through the phone. "Oh..ok." you hesitated hearing her fingers pressing the keys on her keyboard "ok, so the Odinson's are brothers, one specializes in psychology and med management, the other specializes in crisis situations, as well as general and family counseling, which would you prefer?" She asks typing.

"Err...um the general counselor I suppose?" You asked looking out of the window seeing a bird land on your window sill. "Ok great, Dr Odinson has a few available spots open, let me just see.." She trailed off typing away. "ok, he has an opening tomorrow at three for a consultation, does that work?" She asked "yeah that should be fine." You said tapping your fingers on the table. "Ok your all set for tomorrow, and he will go over his treatment plan with you then." She said "ok thank you." You said quickly hanging up. Releasing the breath you were holding you set your phone down deciding to finally do the sink of dishes that had been staring at you for days wondering what tomorrow would bring.

ooOOoo

You sat in your car staring at the building in front of you willing yourself to go inside, looking down seeing it was almost three you took a deep breath "ok...you can do this, what's the worst that could happen?" You asked yourself shutting your car off. You grabbed your keys and phone heading inside, seeing two ladies sitting behind either side of a long counter "hi! Can I help you?" The one looks up smiling, her like dark hair flowing past her shoulders "y..yes...I'm here to see Dr Odinson." You say fidgeting with your keys "which one?" The other lady snaps. "Um...counseling." you say quietly, afraid she'll bark at you again "oh great! Your in the right place then." The dark haired lady smiled.

You finished your paperwork, sitting in the waiting room absently scrolling through your phone when a text popped up. You wanted to ignore it, pretend you had never seen it. You had spent the last month pretending he never existed, the reason you were currently sitting waiting to talk to a compete stranger about your entire life. You sighed, deciding against your better judgment to open the message.

Shaun- Baby, why won't you talk to me? You know why I did what I did. If you had kept up with your responsibilities I wouldn't have looked elsewhere, I'm not the one to blame here. Now text me back and stop being childish.

You sat there staring at the screen, not sure how to react. It was true the last few months of your relationship had been rocky at best. Between you both working all the time and him hanging out with his friends you had no time together, let alone the energy for any intimacy. Somedays it took all you had to just climb into bed at night before doing it all over again. Hence the night you came home from work to another woman in your bed. A pang of sadness ran through you at the memory...

"That's it baby...mm God you feel so good." You heard Shaun moan through the door, the faceless woman moaning his name loudly as the headboard banged against the wall. You had told your boss you wanted to leave early to surprise your boyfriend with dinner, you weren't prepared for the surprise you had waiting for you. "Do i feel better then her daddy?" You heard the woman moan as tears welled in your eyes "so much better baby...she could never compare to this perfect cunt." You heard Shaun growl, hearing a loud thud against the wall.

You turned from the closed door, making you way to the kitchen you took the boxes of take out out of their bags, placing them in the fridge before sitting at the table, waiting. You weren't sure how long you sat there dazed when you heard voices coming down the hall "she's gonna be home soon, but I'll call you later baby. Maybe we can meet up again tomorrow?" You heard him ask opening the front door "anything for you..daddy." the woman replied before your heard the door shut, footsteps making their way into the kitchen stopping suddenly "how long have you been here?" Shaun asked. You looked up seeing his hair a mess, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers "long enough." You sighed looking down.

"Miss y/n?" You heard your name called, snapping you back to now, seeing a dark haired man standing in the doorway with a clipboard "I'm here, sorry." You said grabbing your keys following him. "So as you know you'll be seeing Dr odinson, this is strictly a consultation, so any questions you have feel free to ask ok?" He said smiling "ok, I will." You said as he led you to a closed door knocking on it "come in." You heard a deep booming voice on the other side sending a jolt through you "don't worry, he's a bit loud but he's really very nice." The man said opening the door. You took a deep breath, walking inside as the man closed the door behind you making you jump.

"Ah, you must me miss y/n, I'm Dr Odinson, but please, call me Thor." The man said standing from behind his desk. He smiled widely as he walked around, holding his hand out your eyes met the bluest ones you had ever seen, shining at you like diamonds through the glasses that seemed to frame his face perfectly "h..hi, I'm y/n." You stuttered, slowly reaching for his hand. "Yes, you are." He smiled "come, have a seat and we can talk." He said gesturing to the chair in front of his desk. You slowly sat down watching him walk around taking his seat, his large frame taking up a majority of the chair "so miss y/n, what brings you here today?" He asked, leaning his elbows on the desk, his large hands cupped together under his chin "Well, you see....I have a friend who said I needed to talk to someone, so here i am." You said looking down at your feet.

"Y/n, look at me." He said sternly making your eyes shoot to his "there you are." He smiled "now, I'm glad you have friends who are looking out for you but there must be a reason you decided to come today." He said watching you intently. "Umm...well i..." you trailed off, looking around the room seeing his diploma hung on the wall, as well as a painting of a lightning storm behind him. "Y/n..." he said making you look at him again "i...I recently left a bad relationship, a..and I'm having alot of issues." You said quietly seeing him nod "and well, I'm told I'm bottling it up." You said fidgeting with your keys again. "Do you feel like you are bottling it up?" He asked leaning forward a bit "I guess...maybe. I don't know." You sighed seeing him pick up a pen, writing something on his notepad.

"Can you briefly tell me what happened?" He asked looking up at you, his eyes boring into you "um, well i..I'd rather not." You said balling your fist "well y/n, in order for me to help you, we need to talk about it." He smiled. "I just..I don't think I'm ready. I'm sorry I wasted your time," you said, quickly getting to your feet as he did making your way to the door "wait y/n, please." He said, following you, placing a large hand on the door as you grabbed the handle "I apologize, I wasn't trying to force you." He said quietly, feeling the heat from his chest against your back, his frame towering over you making you crane your head to look at him, his cologne hitting your nose reminding you of sunshine and rain storms "please, let's sit back down hm?" He asked, not moving his hand from the door.

You took a deep breath, dropping your hand from the door you slowly walked back to your chair, this time he grabbed another chair setting it next to you as he sat down facing you, his knee brushing yours "I understand your apprehension, you don't know me as I don't know you, but you must understand I only wish to help you." He said, his eyes almost too bright to look at as you nodded. "Very good, now tell me..when was the last time you ate? And not junk food either." He asked leaning forward "oh...um a few days." You said seeing him nod "and the last time you truly relaxed, just let your mind go?" He continued "oh..never probably." You said with a small laugh.

You shifted in your seat feeling his gaze intensify. "Well y/n, I think your friend is right. I think you are trying to cope, but in an unhealthy manner." He said "but do not worry, I'm here for you." He smiled, his hand grazing your thigh as he shifted making you stiffen. "I will take very good care of you." He continued, placing his large hand on your knee squeezing "umm, well doctor odins...." you started "please, call me Thor." He said squeezing your knee again, his touch feeling electric as the door flew open, a dark haired man storming inside as Thor retracted his hand.

"I told you to meet me thirty minutes ago." The man snapped crossing his arms "as you can see, I am with a patient." Thor said standing up. "Yes, I can see that I'm not daft Thor, when will you be finished?" The man asked, his deep emerald eyes glaring at you "give me five minutes." Thor said walking around to the other side of his desk as the other man sighed, leaving the room. "Please, forgive my brother, he can be quite impatient." Thor laughed shifted through some papers "Brother?" You asked, looking at Thor's dark blonde hair and large build compared to the other man's raven hair and lithe build "yes..adopted." Thor said matter of factly as you nodded.

"Ok, y/n I would like to begin seeing you once a week to begin your treatment." Thor said writing something down "that often?" You asked furrowing your eyebrows "yes, I believe whatever happened with this.."relationship" has put a great deal on you, and I want to help you." He said air quoting. "I'm not sure I can afford that." You said as he stood, rounding the desk again "I told you y/n..I will take care of you. You have nothing to worry about" He smiled, handing you an appointment card, your fingers brushing his sending a shock through your finger tips. You looked down seeing your appointment was in a few days as you stood up, slipping it into your pocket "ok, thank you doct...Thor." You corrected seeing him smile "good girl, now come." He said, a shiver running through you at his praise making you feel uneasy.

He opened the door, waving you in front of him as he locked his door following behind you. "Now y/n, I want you to go home, take a nice hot bath, slip into your softest nightgown and...relax." He smiled, his eyes traveling up and down your body making you tense "are you ready Thor?" You heard the man before "family...am I right?" He smiled again as you chuckled nervously "I shall see you in a few days miss y/n." He said tilting his head "see you then." You said, hurrying towards the door, looking back seeing his eyes hadn't left you you quickly walked out, making your way to your car as fast as you could.

ooOOoo

You drove home, thinking about the interaction with the doctor. Maybe he's a toucher...you thought to yourself getting out of the car, remembering the grip he had on your knee, his large hand splayed across the door when you tried to leave. You could still feel his eyes on you, sending a shiver down your spine as you walked into your apartment, dropping your keys in the bowl by the door. You looked around sighing as you took in the silence. It had been a month since you moved out of your shared apartment with Shaun and you still weren't used to it. You walked to your room, pulling out your silk night gown laying it out on your bed, grabbing a towel you headed to the bathroom, sitting on the tub you turned the water on, pouring in your favorite lilac scented bubble bath, watching the tub fill as you undressed, stepping in lowering yourself into the hot water you closed your eyes, laying back letting it work the tension from your muscles.

"That's it muffin...relax for me." he whispered in your ear making you sigh, feeling his large hand slowly run up your thigh. "I need to see if you taste as sweet as you sound." He cooed, his lips slowly trailing down your collarbone, his teeth grazing your skin making your back arch. "Ah ah, be a good girl and hold still." He said, his deep voice vibrating through you as he lowered himself between your legs, spreading his hand across your stomach. "Mm..you smell exquisite." He growled, placing a kiss on your inner thigh, nipping at the sensative skin as your fingers threaded through his hair, pulling him closer.

"Eager are we?" He laughed, hooking your legs over his wide shoulders. "Don't worry muffin...I'll take good care of you." He purred, placing a soft kiss on your hip bone. "Aaahh....y....yes.....please...." you moaned, trying to rock closer to him, whining as his hand on your stomach held you in place, his large biceps locking your legs around him "I thought you were going to be my good girl." He said, his breath grazing your flesh "i..I am..I'm s...sorry." you breathed, trying to hold as still as possible. "That's right....show me you are worthy..." he trailed off. You opened your eyes, seeing the white ceiling looking down your eyes met electric blue ones seeing him smile as his lips met you skin..

You jolted up, water splashing to the floor as you gripped the side of the tub. "Holy shit." You breathed, running a hand through your hair. You looked down seeing the bubbles had dissipated, still able to feel his hands on you...his warmth seeping into you. "I need a vacation." You muttered, standing up wrapping the towel around yourself heading into your bedroom. You quickly changed, laying in bed you stared at the ceiling, the dream about your doctor leaving an uneasy feeling inside you, deciding it might be best to look for a different therapist as you closed your eyes hoping for a dreamless sleep.

I didn't know who else wanted to be tagged lol

@mochie85 @vbecker10

#thor odinson #thor fanfiction #thor fanfic #thor imagine #dark thor #thor x reader #thor x female reader #thor angst #thor #thor x y/n #thor x you #thor au #thor odinson imagine #thor odinson fanfiction #thor odinson fanfic #thor odinson x you #thor odinson x reader #thor odinson x y/n #thor odinson x female reader #thor odinson angst #thor smut #thor odinson smut #dark fanfiction #dark!thor #dark drabble #au #miniseries #worthy

[foreveralwaysanauthor]

Same Trailer, Different Park (Prologue)

April 14, 2024

Notes - Last night, I went to my first-ever DND game with my oldest nephew, and it was incredible! It's supposed to be every other week, but we're doing it again this upcoming Saturday, and the storyline is giving me so many ideas that I could use for one-shots and stuff! Also, my sciatic pain is going away. It's moved from going all the way from my spine to my right knee to just my right hip, so that's an improvement! Anyway, this was just shy of 50 pages and would have been posted sooner if I had the moodboard and divider transferred to my computer, but I didn't, so here we are lmao! The divider I've used is just temporary until I can sit down and work on one I think suits the vibe, but until then, it is what it is. Also, I hope your finals go well! I believe in you!!

April 14th - the day RMS Titanic struck the iceberg.

Usually, on this day every year, I would be prepping for a Titanic watch party and making sure everyone was ready for it, but that’s just not how it’s going to go this time around. After I get out of school today, it’s officially spring break, and I couldn’t be more excited to finally get away from this endless rain despite the deviation from my annual Titanic anniversary get-together. Riven already offered to give me a ride to school this morning, but since Mom asked me to give Abby and Olly one, and Erica’s piece of shit truck can’t go over puddles without breaking down, he’s giving her and JJ a ride instead. I have to remember to pick up stuff for my battle bot before I leave school, so I’ll tell Abby to remind me - she’s good at that kind of thing. Maybe if I take my notebooks with me on my trip, Mickie and the guys can help me figure out some ideas for what I want to build. Then, I won’t have to come up with something when I get back! Yeah, maybe that’s what I’ll do!

Vivien snapped her journal shut and tugged her headphones off before turning them off and tossing them onto her desk alongside her journal. With a sigh, she found her gaze in the mirror that hung on the back of her closet door as she made her way toward it. Despite the hair sticking in every direction, the blanket marks lining the arm she had fallen asleep on, and the wrinkled pajamas she wasn’t quite ready to rid herself of, she looked ready to start her day. Although she highly doubted she would need a cup of coffee that morning as her excitement for the day was propelling her forward like a cup full of espresso shots, Vivien knew she needed to at least look like she was half as ready as she felt.

Her reflection smiled back as she pushed the door of her closet open, but as she pulled the clothes she had set aside the night before down from her hangers, she found herself wondering if she should have put more thought into the outfit she had chosen. Would her typical choice of jeans, a witty graphic tee, and a brightly colored long-sleeve be a good choice in the long run? She would stand out like a sore thumb in the sixties, but nobody at her school would, frankly, give a shit what she wore. Her dad’s signature triple knock on her bedroom door gave Vivien no chance to change her mind as she hollered back that she was almost ready to go. He left after letting her know that he had to leave for an early morning meeting, wishing her a good morning and telling her that he would see her at lunch before leaving to tell the twins the same.

Sighing as she stretched her tired limbs out, Vivien set her cell phone on her dresser, asking Siri to put on one of her playlists as she debated on what to do with her hair. Glancing at the clothes she had yet to pack for her vacation, Vivien cringed as she realized just how much work she’d forced on her after-school self. For once, she was tragically unprepared for a trip. There was a lot she would have to do in the small amount of time between her release from school and Mick’s family picking her up. Pulling her shirt over her head with a huff and freeing her hair from under the collar, Vivien found her phone screen illuminated as a text came in from the girl who had invited her on her family’s trip in the first place.

Mick’s text was simple - a picture of four plane tickets to the John Wayne Airport in Santa Ana, California. Then, as Vivien smiled at her phone, another message came in, asking her if she was ready. A flutter of eager anticipation flew through Vivien’s text as she replied, telling the older brunette how excited she was to finally be able to spend time with the people they both cared about. Once the message had been sent, Vivien found an ABBA song on her playlist, turned the volume back up, and sang softly to herself as she finished getting ready for the day.

After brushing her teeth and taking the time to detangle the hair she had forgotten to ask someone to braid the night before, Vivien gathered her things for school, shoving her overstuffed folder full of homework and project notes into her backpack before grabbing her permission slip for the regional battle bot tournament and shoving it into the back of her bag where it would be kept relatively safe until the end of the school day. Tucking her school laptop into her bag, zipping it shut, and throwing a strap over her shoulder, Vivien scurried out of her room, just barely remembering to turn off the light as Oliver mumbled out a good morning on his way to the stairs. Chuckling as she wished her brother a good morning, Vivien stepped back to allow Abby to parade by with her backpack on one shoulder, a book in her free hand, and her hair pulled back in a migraine-inducing high pony that Vivien was sure she would hear the girl complaining about later in the day.

Following her siblings downstairs as Abby muttered her oral report to herself, Vivien took in a slow breath and hoped her mother had already left for her meeting with some city council board as the smell of slightly charred bacon wafted through the air. Their mother had a habit of making perfect bacon and sausage for herself and everyone else but would sometimes forget Vivien’s and her ex-husband’s in the pan while she took the time to ensure her twins had everything exactly how they liked it. Vivien never bothered to bring up the issue; instead, she gave the charred bacon strips or sausage patties to Riven as he was practically a walking garbage disposal and seemed to enjoy the blackened breakfast meats. Her siblings had tried to bring it up before, and Vivien knew her father had tried as well, but to no avail. The woman wouldn’t argue much with her younger children and always denied anything being wrong, pointing out the fact that Vivien never brought it up herself, but even when Oliver argued that the disgust on Vivien’s face was obvious, nothing changed.

Entering the kitchen, Vivien smirked as Oliver turned back toward Abby and began spouting random historical facts to throw his twin off her train of thought. Abby was quick to fight back, whacking her brother with her book as she told him to shut up and let her focus. Their mother was quick to jump in and tell her only son to leave his sister alone before handing them both their lunch boxes and telling them to get going before they were late. Abby sent Vivien an apologetic look as the eldest of the O’Brian kids took the only remaining lunch box from the counter, and their mother ushered them toward the coat closet. After giving the twins a quick kiss on the forehead and telling Vivien to drive safely, the woman grabbed her jacket and left, heading out to her car and taking off while the kids were still pulling on their spring coats. 

With a sigh, Vivien grabbed her keys from the hook by the door and held the door open for her siblings, but it wasn’t until they were in the pale blue Hyundai Vivien had received from their father after passing her license test that any of them chose to speak up. Oliver huffed as he slid into the back seat, buckling his seatbelt before stretching out across the bench seat and sighing, “I don’t get Mom’s issue.”

“Olly,” Vivien sighed, a soft reprimand that she hoped would keep her brother from ranting the whole way to their school.

“No, Viv,” Abby cut in before Oliver could speak, “we all see she treats you differently, and it isn’t right!”

“It isn’t,” Vivien agreed as she pushed the key into the ignition and started the car, turning the defroster on to keep the windows clear, “but it isn’t worth the effort of trying to change her. Besides, I’ve got you guys and Dad.”

“And Auntie Hayley and Aunt Charlie,” Oliver piped in.

“Exactly,” Vivien nodded, smiling at her younger brother as she backed out of the driveway.

Abby huffed, crossing her arms over her chest and slouching in her seat as she complained, “Still. I wish we knew what her problem was.”

“I have a few theories,” Oliver claimed.

Abby grinned, “We know. You’ve shown us your corkboard of conspiracy theories.”

“Yeah,” Vivien snorted, putting the car into drive and taking off down their street. “I swear, introducing you to MatPat and Shane Dawson at a young age was a bad idea.”

“Seriously,” Abby agreed teasingly. “If I have to be subjected to another three-hour rant about the government brainwashing us through Justin Beiber’s music, I just might pitch myself off of the water tower.”

“First of all, that’s not what my theory was about,” Oliver chuckled, “and second, I meant about Mom treating Viv differently.”

Shifting so that she could see both Oliver and Vivien, Abby said, “Well, you’re the conspiracy theorist here. What do you think is the issue?”

Excited to finally have the chance to blather about the ideas he had been bouncing around in his head for a while, Oliver beamed as he began his spiel, “My first thought was that she’s jealous that Vivien has a better relationship with Auntie Hayley and is upset that she’s not Viv’s birth mom, but that wasn’t an issue when we were little, so why would it be now?”

“Yeah, makes sense,” Abby nodded thoughtfully, sparing a glance at Vivien, who nodded as she slowed to a stop at an intersection. Turning back to her twin, Abby pressed, “So, what else you got?”

Oliver sighed, “Sadly, I think the most likely reason is that she’s just pissy because she thinks Viv forced me into the ‘Alphabet Soup Community’ and is scared she’ll do the same to you, Abs.”

Abby’s expression shifted, a disgusted wince tugging her eyebrows together in frustration as she took in her brother’s theory. It made sense, but she didn’t want to admit it. Though Vivien had come out as bisexual years ago, their mother never truly seemed to accept it until Vivien began dating Royce a few months ago. When Oliver came out as gay, the woman had taken the news out on her eldest child, pulling her aside and blaming her for “poisoning her baby brother” with her “disgusting beliefs.” Abby had unintentionally overheard the conversation, listening proudly to her older sister as the brunette fought for her brother to be treated better than she had been. When Abby later told Oliver what she’d heard, the pair found themselves in Vivien’s room, showering their sister with kind words of gratitude and love that the older girl seemed to relish in.

Ready to rant about their mother’s blatant homophobia, Abby scoffed; however, it was Vivien who spoke before her sister could rage for the rest of the drive, “Sadly, that could be right.” Vivien placed a hand on top of the one Abby had placed on the center console, gently squeezing her hand as she continued, “Even though I hope that’s not the case, it could very well be. She’s always been a little… uptight about that sort of thing.”

“A little?” Oliver chortled, finding Vivien’s gaze in the rear-view mirror. “That’s the understatement of the year.”

Abby laughed, “You couldn’t pull a needle out of her ass with a tractor!”

“Abby!” Vivien reprimanded despite her laughing at the girl’s choice of words.

“It’s the truth!” Abby argued. “I’m sure she would’ve sent you guys to conversion therapy or something if Dad hadn’t said something.”

Vivien sighed as she turned onto School Street, “Still. She’s our mom, and until we move out, we have no choice but to put up with her bullshit.”

Oliver shifted in his seat, ready to crack a joke in order to lighten the situation, but Abby huffed, “I just don’t get why your sexualities matter so much to her. It’s not like it has anything to do with her in the first place.”

“Maybe she-”

“And why should she care if I’m straight or not?” Abby continued, cutting off Vivien’s statement with a scoff. “Is she just going to drop all of us if I someday decide to come out of the closet?”

Once he was sure his twin was done ranting, Oliver shrugged, “Maybe. Like Auntie Hayley said, Mom can’t stand that we aren’t her little dolls who do whatever she says now. I wouldn’t put it past her if she chooses to up and leave if this becomes a three-for-three situation.”

Taking in the wounded expression on her baby sister’s face as she pulled into an empty parking spot, Vivien smiled reassuringly and said, “I doubt you have much of anything to worry about anyway. Even if you came out as bi like I did, you and Malachi have been dating for, what, almost a year now?” When Abby nodded wordlessly, Vivien continued, “Well, Mom only chilled out when she found out I was dating Royce. Since you’re dating a boy already, I doubt there would be a problem.”

“Besides,” Oliver began as he pushed open his door and picked up his bag from the floor, “you’re straight - you have nothing to worry about.”

Plastering a smile on her face as she tugged her bag up from the floor, Abby nodded, “Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

Patting Abby’s hand with a grin, Vivien opened her door and stepped outside, grabbing her backpack from the backseat and locking the car once the doors were closed. Once her keys were safely tucked into the front pocket of her backpack, Vivien followed her siblings to the front door of the school. Before she could step inside, however, a honk from a nearby car made  Vivien jump, whirling around to see Riven’s red Miata pulling to a stop by the sidewalk. Telling her siblings she would see them later, Vivien headed over to the car as the passenger’s side door opened, and a head of emerald hair stepped out before pushing the seat forward.

“Hey, Viv,” Jade greeted with a smile as she tightened her ponytail.

As Erica tumbled out of the backseat, the seatbelt wrapped around the ankle of her Doc Martens, she peered up at the brunette and beamed, “Oh, good! I was hoping to catch you before first period.” 

“Mission accomplished,” Vivien chuckled as Erica hobbled her way away from the car. As the car door closed and the window rolled down, she leaned over and teased, “That’s the only car full of ladies you’ll ever have, isn’t it?”

Riven sent his best friend a grin and gestured to his fellow bandmates as he spoke, “Blues Clues over there can hardly be considered a lady, and considering JJ is the only cheerleader who has ever given me the time of day, probably.”

Chuckling, Vivien rolled her eyes and said, “You’re an idiot.”

“Love you too.”

Before Vivien could return the sentiment, Erica placed a hand on her shoulder and said, “Alright, dipshits, let’s go before the bell rings and we get told off.”

Jade chuckled as she tossed her Chapstick into her bag, “By who; Viv’s dad?”

Vivien snorted at the thought of her dad reprimanding them, but Erica beat her to the punch as she turned toward her girlfriend and said, “I was thinking Coach Boogeyman.”

Leaning over the passenger seat, Riven wondered, “I thought Bogman was forced to leave after the color guard claimed she was spying on them in the showers.”

“She was supposed to,” Jade huffed, “but until they find enough evidence to take her to court, she has to finish out the year.”

“Sadly,” a voice sighed from behind the group. Turning toward the voice, Vivien smiled as her father spoke, “Until we have her on camera, there’s nothing we can do. Besides, she’s been pushing off retirement for years. With this accusation, we should be able to finalize everything at the end of the year.”

“Good,” Erica snipped as Vivien stepped around her. “She’s always given me the creeps.”

“Understandably so,” Damien chuckled softly, smiling as his daughter slotted herself under his arm. “Hey, babygirl.”

“Hey, Dad,” Vivien beamed. “Did you come to walk us to class?”

Damien shook his head, squeezing his daughter’s shoulder as he replied, “Not quite. I saw you four chatting and figured I would try to get you inside before anyone else came out and started yelling.” Leaning forward enough to see Riven, he asked, “Are you joining us, Riven, or are you just going to do virtual lessons today?”

“No, I’ll be in,” Riven quickly replied, glancing toward the parking lot with his signature grin. “Just have to find a place to park.”

“Make it quick, bud,” the man stated as he glanced at his smartwatch. “The bell rings in ten minutes.”

Riven nodded, checking to make sure his path was clear before pulling away from the curb, his Miata drifting toward the parking lot as Damien began leading his daughter and her friends inside. After handing her lunchbox off to her dad so he could put it into the staff fridge until lunch, Vivien waited until Riven came running up to the front door before stepping inside behind him, taking his hand and allowing him to pull her toward the stairwell across from the main office, waving goodbye to their friends and her father as they propelled up the stairs. Riven dragged her up to the next floor, where their lockers resided, before letting her go as he began twisting in his locker combination. Meanwhile, Vivien pulled her keys from her backpack, slipped a purple-painted one into her lock, and freed it, popping open the metal door with a sigh and placing her bag on the hook inside.

“You know,” Riven began, “it’s days like today that I wish my birthday wasn’t after the school cutoff.”

“Rough morning?” Vivien asked with a grin.

Riven scoffed as he tugged his social studies workbook down from the shelf he had shoved it onto the day before, “I slept through my alarm, and Dad was already at work, so he couldn’t help. Then, I woke up to Erica screeching about needing a ride, only to have my phone die mid-call. And, to top it all off, I’m about eighty-three percent sure these sweatpants are yours from the weekend.”

Vivien’s eyebrow lifted, but as she glanced down at the navy blue sweatpants Riven donned,  her eyes widened. Sure enough, the stars and planets she had embroidered around the pockets and hemline of her sweatpants now stood as a glaring reminder of the clothes she had tossed into the wash at Riven’s house. They had been cooking stuffed shells, and she had dropped the jar of sauce, splattering chunky, red tomato sauce all over the floor and their legs. After putting the food in the oven, they got a majority of the stains out in the sink but threw their clothes into the laundry afterward to get rid of the smell. She had forgotten the pants in her rush to get out the door on Monday morning, having told Riven she would take them back when she went back to his house after spring break was over. Holding back her bark of laughter, Vivien grinned at the thought of Riven rushing around his room that morning, throwing on whatever he could find before leaving the house and somehow missing the colorful threads lining his legs.

“Yeah,” Riven breathed, rolling his eyes at Vivien’s not-so-discrete snort of laughter. “Erica thought it was hilarious.”

“It kind of is,” Vivien giggled softly. At Riven’s dismayed sigh, her grin faltered, and she glanced down at her pants as she offered, “Do you want to trade? I’m pretty sure I stole these from you over the summer.”

Riven spared a glance at the jeans Vivien had worn and grinned; the cuffs were rolled up toward her ankles to prevent them from being stepped on, and she had to wear a belt just to keep the waistband in place, something Riven had no issue with in the slightest. With a snort, he shook his head, “I think I’m good, Pip. You made these and, despite them being on the shorter side, I’m only here until lunch. I can run home and change before work after I’m done eating. Besides, they wouldn’t match your outfit.”

Vivien’s eyebrow lifted into her bangs as she asked, “Since when do you care if clothes match?”

“I don’t,” Riven shrugged as he closed his locker, “but I know you do. Now, come on, it’s almost time for the bell.”

Scrambling to grab her books for the next two classes so she wouldn’t have to run to her locker between bells, Vivien slammed her locker shut and walked alongside Riven until he reached his class. They wouldn’t see each other again until she was allowed to head to the cafeteria for lunch, but their mornings in the halls were something she had cherished for a while. Joining a few of her classmates on their way to their first period of the day, Vivien caught a glimpse of the oversized clock on the wall and sighed. She had four periods until lunch, and only two were on the same floor, but she had planned to use her study hall block to join her friend Emily in the drama wing of the main floor. 

Emily - or Emmy, as she was often called by her relatively small friend group - had been begging her for the last two weeks to join her for the auditions in some musical the school was putting on. Originally, Vivien had no desire to audition as she hated the thought of having so many eyes on her, but when Emily pointed out that the auditorium was in close proximity to the cafeteria, she relented. If it meant she didn’t have to run from her study hall on the top floor all the way down to the main floor to eat, she was in.

Her first block was spent listening to Mrs. Adams - the only social studies teacher who actually seemed to enjoy teaching - ask everyone what their plans were for spring break. She loved to make the class hard as most of her students were either on the honor roll or enrolled in advanced placement classes, but Fridays were the one day a week when everyone got some reprieve from her constant stream of tests, exams, and droning lessons. By the time the bell rang, everyone had broken off into groups, writing out their plans for the week as their teacher sat at her desk with a smile, grading the last few papers on her computer. Vivien had made up a story on the fly, writing out her plans for the trip to California she told everyone she was going on, but as the bell rang, she closed her notebook and shoved it into her desk before grabbing her book for the next class and following her friend, Carter, down the hall toward the French class she had signed up for at the start of the semester.

Although she struggled a lot with the language - finding her old Spanish and German classes easier than French - the teacher commended her many times for at least trying. She wanted nothing more than to learn the language her boyfriend’s family knew, intending to surprise them on her trip. However, she knew her attempts were fairly futile. French just wasn’t her strong suit. Grateful her grade for the class wasn’t going to affect her final grades for the year, Vivien slumped into her chair in the middle of the room and hoped the class would go by faster than it usually did so that she could escape to the auditorium.

Thankfully, it seemed as though the teachers were of the same mindset as the students - eager to escape the concrete and stucco walls and leave for vacation. After answering a one-sided paper of questions in French about how their week had been, the teacher let them wander the halls, allowing Vivien to dump her books in her locker before making her way down to the auditorium. The auditorium was hardly ever used unless they had a guest speaker or a show being rehearsed, but the doors were almost always left unlocked, making it easy for Vivien to slip inside and make her way to the front row of chairs.

The auditorium would be empty for a while before the audition time came, but as Vivien had all the time in the world until her friend showed up, she didn’t mind the silence. Opening the notes app on her phone, she began typing out all of the things she would need to pack when she got home. Her list was already relatively short as she had put her essentials into her suitcase after using them that morning before school - her toiletries taking up the small pouch in the front of her luggage to leave room for the clothes she was still up in the air about. Although she knew that clothes weren’t really necessary as Mick had told her many times that she would be able to borrow period-typical clothes from them upon her arrival, she still needed to shove some summery clothing into her suitcase to make it seem as though her time had truly been spent in the California sun. 

With a sigh, Vivien realized she also needed to leave room for the souvenirs she would be bringing back and any potential shopping she did in either world. By the time she had whittled down her list to just necessities, her journal, and some extra changes of, well, every article of clothing she owned, people had begun to fill the auditorium, ascending the stage and beginning vocal warm-ups that would have impressed Sharpay Evans. Vivien tucked her earbuds in as the noise in the room began to grow, only pulling them out when Emily appeared in the seat next to her, excitedly tugging Vivien out of her shell and onto the stage with her as she rambled about the show they were going to be performing for the end of the school year.

Checking her blood pressure on her watch, Vivien sighed as the drama teachers, Mrs. Kaisla and Mr. Doyle, began telling everyone where to stand before giving them the run-down of the show. “As you all know by the posters in the halls,” Mr. Doyle began, “this year’s final show will be Hairspray.”

“I really want to play Tracy or Penny,” Emily squealed in a whisper mere inches from Vivien’s ear. Grabbing Vivien’s shirt in a fist, she added, “Imagine if Colby gets picked for Link or Seaweed - it would be perfect!”

Chuckling at the girl’s obvious crush on the dark-skinned football player who had been in their friend circles since kindergarten, Vivien whispered back, “I admire your enthusiasm, but is he the only reason you’re auditioning? I mean, you hate being the center of attention as much as I do being on stage; why would you wish for the lead?”

Emily’s sparkling smile faltered as Vivien’s words sunk in but quickly reappeared as the teachers wrapped up their short spiel about the show, “That’s why you’re here.”

“To make sure you don’t look like the worst performer here?” Vivien questioned teasingly.

Emily scoffed, elbowing Vivien in the arm, “Shut up. You’re not that bad.”

“Says you,” Vivien replied as Mrs. Kaisla began ushering some students toward center stage. As soon as she was sure neither she nor Emily were part of the group selected, she added, “There’s a reason I only ever sing in the car or the shower.”

With a sigh, Emily nudged her friend closer to the front of the stage and said, “And there’s a reason I asked you to come with me instead of literally anybody else. You have a beautiful voice. Besides, I need someone here who makes it easier to be in the spotlight. Now, shush!”

Vivien rolled her eyes but smiled as Emily hushed her, urging her to watch the others as they were instructed on what to do. Minutes flew by as the group took turns singing popular songs played over a bluetooth speaker one of the boys had brought to the school. Before she knew it, Vivien felt her stomach clench anxiously as her name was called, and Emily practically dragged her to the center of the stage. Taking a deep breath as the others took turns singing, Vivien tried to think of a song - any song - she could sing at least fairly well, but any titles she knew seemed to flee her brain as her mouth dried up as she resorted to biting the inside of her cheek to keep herself from fidgeting under the blazing lights.

As Emily’s choice - an 80s hit that had made an appearance in the last season of Stranger Things - began to play, Vivien realized just how doomed she was, and her mind flickered to the cell phone in her back pocket. Surely, her Spotify would have something she could work with, right? However, to her chagrin, as soon as the device was free of its jean prison, Vivien found the music had stopped playing, and she was forced to choose a song without any assistance. Had she really taken that long to decide? Clearing her throat, Vivien smiled tersely as she gave up the only song that had found its way to the front of her brain in time - ABBA’s Lay All Your Love On Me. 

The teachers she hardly knew seemed to smile as they talked amongst themselves, and although a part of her was sure they were talking about how easy the song was to mess up, Emily’s encouraging smile from the side of the stage somewhat assured her that all was fine. Closing her eyes as the music began playing, Vivien attempted to force her fears down as she sucked in a deep breath. All she had to do was get through a section of the song, and she would be free to leave as everyone else was. Pretending she was just singing in the car with Riven, Vivien allowed her voice to carry over the music, her enjoyment of the song obvious as she began to sway to the beat, the lyrics flowing out of her like water.

Once the chorus had left her, the music began to fade, allowing the teachers to be heard as they scribbled something on their clipboards. Looking up at her, Mrs. Kaisla smiled and said, “Thank you, Vivien. You’re free to go.”

“Remember to check the cast list when we come back to school,” Mr. Doyle added before gesturing toward the side of the stage, where Emily received her with a hug and a squeal.

The two made their exit relatively quickly, Vivien practically pushing Emily through the double doors so that she could find a source of oxygen in the halls. Once the auditorium doors had closed with a click, Vivien sighed, checking her blood pressure as a wave of anxiety-fueled dizziness washed over her. After making up a quick excuse as to where she was going, Vivien told Emily she would see her after lunch before making her way to her locker, where she kept her water bottle. Sitting on the floor by her locker, Vivien sipped at her water until the bell rang, forcing herself to calm down as she scrolled through Pinterest.

Before long, Jade and Riven appeared, having left the same class Vivien would have to attend after lunch - World History. They hauled her off of the floor, and Riven tossed his books into his locker before draping an arm around Vivien's shoulders and guiding her toward the stairs while Jade rattled off about the teacher - Mr. Smith - being the most boring teacher in the school. After retrieving Vivien's lunch from her father, she joined her friends at their usual table by the windows on the far wall of the cafeteria, spending their lunch block playing a segment of their Dungeons and Dragons campaign on their phones while eating. 

After a while of playing and eating, the bell rang, and they cleaned up their table before tossing Vivien's now empty lunch box into Erica's locker near the gym before saying goodbye to Riven and splitting off to their respective classes. For Vivien, the rest of her classes went by without a hitch, time flying by the way she had hoped all morning that it would. Once her final class of the day ended, Vivien sent a quick text to the group chat she and her siblings had created, telling them that she had to drop off her form for the battle bot tournament and would meet them at the car. Making her way from the top floor to her locker, Vivien gathered her belongings, shoving her water bottle and a small bag of Cheetos her Trigonometry teacher had given her into her backpack before slinging her backpack onto her shoulders.

Once she was back on the main floor, Vivien scurried across the hall, rounded the entrance to the office, and took the stairwell across from the vending machines down to the school's basement. As she descended the stairs, dampness and mildew filled her nostrils, making her nose wrinkle in disgust as she pushed the door to the bottom floor open. Hardly anyone visited the basement unless they had to, as there was little to see, but there were a select few who found comfort in the almost eerie silence and smell the basement offered. While the basement wasn't overly dark or dreary, it never quite felt warm enough to give off the same welcoming feeling the upper parts of the school gave. 

Perhaps it was the piercing white light of the fluorescents or the steady beeping from the computer lab that sounded almost exactly like a hospital heart monitor that kept people away, but regardless, there were only a handful of students who enjoyed the ominous, cold, almost abandoned feeling the basement radiated. Vivien was one of those odd students. After years of exploring abandoned buildings with Riven for his photography blog and her Instagram, the smell and cold environment of the school's basement did little to drive her away. If anything, it was almost calming.

There weren't many reasons for most students to visit the basement, as there were only three labs and two committees that met there. The chemistry, robotics, and computer laboratories were in a triangle-like formation at the very end of the hall, while the photography and student politics groups met at the other end of the hall, their rooms across from each other and sharing a single wall that was thin enough to hear conversations happening in the other room. Vivien hummed to herself as she stepped around an old projector that had been wheeled into the hallway, grinning fondly at the memory of having to haul the old machine up the stairs to the top floor for one of the summer school teachers while helping her dad out in the office. Stepping into the Bermuda Triangle of classrooms at the end of the hall, Vivien scanned the names beside the doors before making her way toward the left-most room.

The door to the robotics lab had been kept open with a hunk of metal the teacher, Mr. Kevin Hill, had welded in his free time one summer. Mr. Hill was one of Vivien's favorite teachers of all time. Mr. Hill was a short Irishman with a fondness for taking things apart and rebuilding them, something Vivien could appreciate. There were a few other students in the room - Vivien's bandmate, Erica; Damon Perry, a vitiligo-skinned freshman who hardly spoke around upperclassmen unless he was spoken to first; and Preston Osborne, a senior who thought his shit didn't stink because he had more money than he knew what to do with. 

Unlike the rest of the handful of rich kids at their school, Vivien had known Preston by extension for years. He had been something of a nightmare for the school system, using his daddy's reputation as a hotshot lawyer in the city to be a dick to anyone who dared push back against whatever he wanted. According to Erica and Jade, Preston wasn't horrible until middle school, when the older kids began picking on him. One threat of a lawsuit later, Preston officially became known as someone nobody wanted to trifle with. Over the years, Vivien had heard her father complain about the boy and had heard horror stories from teachers who'd had him, but Vivien hadn't known him personally until she became the youngest person from their school ever to win the regional battle bot championship. 

In her first year fighting back in seventh grade, she had beaten Preston by a long shot, her little, ladybug-shaped robot tearing Preston's robot apart with its electrified saws. Preston, of course, seemed incapable of taking the news well, having argued with the competition's judges until he was forced to either accept defeat or be disqualified. Ever since that day, Vivien found herself with an upperclassman who thought of her as nothing more than his arch-nemesis. Though she found him obnoxious after a while, Vivien hardly played into his made-up game of tug-of-war unless provoked, something that seemed to piss Preston off more instead of making him see how ridiculous he was being.

Rolling her eyes at the imbecile's glare, Vivien signed her name on the clipboard on the teacher's desk, taking a glance at the competition as she allowed her backpack to slide down from her shoulders. The robotics teacher was supposed to supervise from his desk as Erica, Preston, and Damon scoured the materials the teacher had laid out for them to take, but Damon had somehow managed to ask a question that kept the old Irishman talking while Erica and Preston searched the scrap bins the teacher had left out for them to rifle through. The bins would be there until the day of the competition, giving Vivien plenty of time to come up with a model and a mock-up before she started digging through the bins of scrap metal that, hopefully, wouldn't be sending anyone to the hospital for a tetanus shot that year.

As Mr. Hill stepped away from his conversation with Damon, he found Vivien standing by his desk as she dug through her backpack for the paper she swore she had left in the front of the biggest pouch. "Ah," the teacher began, "Miss O'Brian. I was wondering when you would show." 

Vivien peered over at the teacher and smiled before resuming her search, "Well, better late than never, right, Mr. H?" 

The graying man smiled with a short nod as he sat in his chair once again, "So far, I have only received a couple of sign-ups, so your competition from our school is looking rather small. Do you have an idea for what your battle bot will look like this year?" 

"You know I can't tell you, even if I do," Vivien stated as she tugged her permission slip out and handed it to the teacher. As Mr. Hill glanced over the paper with mild interest, Vivien stepped away from his desk and looked over some of the objects the teacher had prepared. She picked up a few metal pieces she could use for either a weapon or a protective shield and placed them in a plastic Walmart bag that Mr. Hill had left out for the students to use. "Besides, I wouldn't dare divulge my secrets to my enemies," Vivien claimed theatrically as she glanced around at the other students in the room. 

Erica leaned forward just enough to stick her tongue out at Vivien, placing a couple of springs in a plastic bag the teacher had given her. Damon simply smiled but kept quiet as he signed out a workshop tool that he'd need to return in the next two weeks. Vivien returned his smile and chuckled; in the few years she had known him, Damon had always seemed to be a very quiet, reserved person, but he seemed to come a little bit out of his shell when it came time for battles such as this one. However, as opposed to his silent competitors, Preston Osborne scoffed at Vivien and rolled his eyes as he turned toward the brunette. 

He used the wrench he was holding to point at Vivien, watching her with scrutiny as he spoke, "After last year's height requirement debacle, I doubt anybody would take your advice." 

"What?" Vivien began sarcastically, her voice taking on an infantilizing tone. "Are you still upset that mine was bigger than yours?" Ignoring the snorted bark of shocked laughter from her blue-haired friend, the brunette, never one to back down from a fight with the arrogant male, moved so she could look Preston as straight in the eye as her shorter stature would allow. "At least you could see mine in the ring. Everyone needed a pair of binoculars to see yours; it was so small." 

Preston stared down his nose at Vivien before chuckling condescendingly, "At least mine didn't need a judge to do a height check last minute." 

"Yeah, and? Who won that battle again?" Vivien asked rhetorically. Gasping dramatically, she placed a hand over her chest and answered her own question, "Oh, right! Me." 

"You just don't know when to shut up, do you?" Preston retorted with an arrogant scoff. Then, his voice lowered as he hissed, "My dad could sue the shit out of your family. I'd run you and your whole family out of town."

"I don't know who told you that, dipshit," Vivien laughed, "but your daddy's got no power here and neither do you. In fact, I bet your 'big city lawyer' father would love to hear all about how often you try to threaten people in this school. Threatening bodily harm is a potentially jailable offense, you know. I can see the headlines now!"

Vivien pretended to gag as Preston leaned closer, his breath polluting her face as he snarled, "That big mouth of yours is going to get you in trouble if you don't shut it."

"If you think my mouth is big, I feel bad for your girlfriend." Vivien paused, gave a mock gasp, then added, "Oh, wait, you don't have one. Do you, shrimp dick?"

"Look, you little bitch, I-"

"Mister Osborne, Miss O'Brian," Mr. Hill interrupted, rising from his seat before the argument could get any worse. "I believe this argument will get you nowhere. Mr. Osborne, as you have already gathered your things, I suggest you sign out any tools you may need and leave before this ends up as another after-school detention for you. Miss O'Brian, please continue looking around for any particular parts you may need." 

Vivien nodded and waited for Preston to back down and storm off before she resumed her perusing, allowing the teacher to handle Preston as he approached the desk. Mr. Hill was one of the teachers who always formed his own opinions of the children who came into his class, regardless of their notoriety. The man didn't care about who the kids' parents were; he would treat him the same way he would treat any student. Vivien knew from Riven's occasional photography classes at the community college that Mr. Hill had taken opportunities to float around the different universities in the area, teaching robotics and photography when he wished; if he got fired from this school for not babying Preston or some other Karen's spawn, it probably wouldn't be a hard blow. Maybe that was why Vivien, Erica, and most of the other students who didn't like Preston liked Mr. Hill so much. 

Soon, but not soon enough, Preston left and took his bags with him, and Erica flipped him off as he disappeared down the hallway. Turning toward the grinning Vivien, she beamed, "Bitch, you handled him so much better than I would have." 

Vivien smiled as she tossed a handful of small springs into her wagon. "Thanks. I just- I can't stand him."

"Who can other than his parents?" Erica scoffed, "His head's so far up his own ass, I'm surprised he can walk straight."

"I have to agree with you," Mr. Hill piped in as he sat back in his seat. "Although Preston makes fair marks as far as I am aware, he rides on his father's reputation to keep himself above everyone else. Though, as a teacher, I must advise you change your approach, a couple of wounds to his pride will, hopefully, do him well over time." 

"I doubt he'll change," Vivien said, shaking her head, as she examined a small shell-shaped piece that could be used as a cover for her robot. 

The teacher returned to the book he had been reading, and Erica nodded in agreement before taking a battery holder and putting it inside her bag. She looked at Vivien's bag and shook her head at how much the younger girl had already stored away. "Well, I'm looking forward to being annihilated by you again this year, as always." 

Vivien knew the other girl was only joking, as Erica had told her before that she only entered the battles for fun and found it interesting to see how far she could get. With a smile, Vivien chirped, "And I look forward to annihilating you, as always." 

Erica laughed, giving Vivien a quick hug before leaving, claiming she and Jade were getting a ride to work from one of the girls on the cheer team who worked at the mall with them. Once her friend was gone, Vivien went back to picking out parts for her robot, picking out items she thought could be of use and tucking them into the bag that had begun to weigh her arm down. The brunette spent another handful of minutes in the classroom before deciding she had enough things. As she placed her heavy bag inside another, she tied the handles in a knot and said, "Well, Mr. Hill, I believe I'll be on my way." 

"Actually, Miss O'Brian, I have to go over the rules for the battles before you leave," the teacher claimed, tucking a bookmark into the novel he was reading before pulling a paper from his desk drawer. "Normally, I would wait until I have you in class, but since we won't be back in school until after spring break, now is as good a time as any." 

Vivien accepted the paper from the teacher, reading over the first couple of rules before nodding to herself. "Did they change them or something?" 

"Not exactly." Mr. Hill stood and made his way around the desk, sitting on the other side of the surface as he pointed out some of the notes at the bottom of the page. "The officials are new this year. They've agreed to keep the three-foot height acceptance, but they've eliminated the use of robotic arms that can be used to puncture another robot from the maximum height - as you can see here." 

"Let me guess, that rule was made because of my robot from last year?" Vivien pondered. 

"That would be my guess as well," the teacher agreed with a grin. "While that robot of yours was quite impressive, you have to keep it short if that's your plan this year." 

Vivien shook her head, knowing that wasn't her idea at all. She liked to change things up every year, never showcasing the same attack twice. Thinking for a moment, Vivien scanned over the jumbled nonsense on the page that she would probably hand off to Mick the moment she saw her and asked, "Are saws and shields still allowed?" 

"Yes, of course," Mr Hill said, nodding insistently. "It would be very hard to take that ruling out. Just remember that you need to have your robot done by the first of June. The following week, the judges will go through the ruling process. Any final adjustments will have to be made before the end of the school day on Friday, the ninth. The first day of battles will be Saturday, and Sunday will be finals and awards, as per usual." 

Vivien allowed herself a brief moment to process the information before nodding, a smile lighting her face as she spoke, "That sounds good to me." Picking up her backpack from the floor, Vivien folded and tucked the paper into the pocket of her jeans and headed out of the classroom. It wasn't until she was near the stairwell that she heard her name being called again. Turning toward the voice, she found Mr. Hill standing in the doorway of his classroom. "Yeah?" she called in return. 

"Just something I meant to tell you before you left." The teacher held his book up a little, a gesture that made Vivien believe he was going to quote something from it, yet, without looking down, he began speaking once more. "Those who are willing to work hard - day in and day out - to achieve their goals are the true winners, regardless of the scores or the judges' opinions. I don't doubt that you are one of those hard-working people, Vivien; you know what you're doing. Your skills never cease to amaze me, and I hope you prove me right again this year." 

With a raised brow, Vivien asked, "Prove you right, sir?"

"I've been an AP Robotics teacher here for twenty-three years," Mr Hill said. "It's not often that I have someone in my class throughout junior and senior high school. Other teachers said I  should have booted you down to the regular class with Miss Denis, but since the day you first walked into my class, I knew you had potential. Since then, you've proved them wrong every step of the way. I commend you for that."

Vivien stood in place for a moment, stunned at her teacher's kind words. "Thanks, Mr Hill. I won't let you down." 

"I know you won't, Miss O'Brian. You never do. Have a nice evening," he replied before turning back to his book and stepping back over to his desk, leaving Vivien standing alone in the hallway. 

Vivien stared at the spot Mr. Hill had previously occupied, letting out an airy laugh as a brilliant smile found its way onto her face. Taking in a deep breath, she straightened her posture and turned toward the stairs, propelling herself up them with newfound confidence. Her bag of assorted metal bits jangled, clanking together in a symphony of scrapes and tings as she ascended the stairs. Once she had reached the main floor, Vivien retrieved her lunch box from Erica's locker. The girl's four-digit code - 8104, Erica's birthdate and year combined - was one of the many Vivien kept in her notes app in case her friends ever forgot them, and even though she was sure Erica couldn't possibly forget her locker combination, Vivien enjoyed knowing that, if her friends needed her to, she could help them.

After tugging the lunch box out from the chaos that was Erica's locker, Vivien rushed to the office, saying a quick goodbye to her dad before heading to the main entrance, pushing open the first set of doors before lifting the hood of her jacket over her head and hoping her siblings had gotten the spare key to her car from their father as rain poured from above. Shoving open the door to the outside world, Vivien watched as rain slammed down in sheets, taking a deep breath before bolting into the freezing rain, letting out a shrill screech as she scurried across the parking lot to her car. She threw the door open and jumped inside, grateful her siblings had already started the car's heater, as she slammed the door shut behind her.

Abby smirked at her sister's reflection in the rear-view mirror as Vivien shivered in her seat, and with a snort, she asked, "Bit chilly, sissy?"

Turning back toward her little sister, Vivien nodded and sighed, "You could say that." Hauling her backpack and Walmart bag of metal parts over the gap between her seat and Oliver's, Vivien asked, "Can you hold onto these for me, Abs?"

Peering back as Abby placed Vivien's belongings on the seat next to her, Oliver asked, "You're doing the championship again this year?"

"When doesn't she, Olly?" Abby asked rhetorically as Vivien backed out of her parking spot. "She fights every year, and every year, she wins."

"I know that; I'm not stupid," Oliver retorted.

"Debatable," Abby shrugged.

Ignoring his twin, Oliver said, "I just thought that, since she was going on vacation, she wouldn't be participating this year."

"I'll have plenty of time," Vivien claimed, putting the car into drive and steering it toward the parking lot's exit. "Besides, I'll be with Mickie for a whole week. If my battle bot isn't at least halfway done by the time I get back, then one of us either got sick, somehow got pregnant, or died."

Oliver let out a snort, "I mean, fair enough, but aren't you going to do anything fun while you're in California?"

"Building things is fun," Vivien retorted, flicking on her turn signal and glancing both ways before pulling out of the parking lot, "but yeah, we're going to the beach, checking out some museums, and we might visit Disneyland if  we have the time."

Leaning forward between the front seats, Abby asked, "How is it possible that Oliver and I might have a more entertaining spring break than you?"

Sparing a glance at her siblings, Vivien asked, "What do you mean?"

With a smile bright enough to put the sun to shame, Oliver announced, "I'm going with Markus' family to New Jersey so we can check out that American Dream place with the indoor water park and ski slope."

"Really?" Vivien asked. Muttering more to herself than anything, she added, "I'm surprised Mom allowed that after you broke your ankle the last time you went on a trip with them."

Abby hummed in agreement before speaking, "And I'm going with Brynna's family to Great Wolf Lodge for her birthday."

"Those sound fun and all," Vivien admitted, "but how is that more fun than literally going across the country?"

"Because you're going to be doing nerd shit while on vacation while we're having actual fun," Oliver stated blandly.

As the car slowed to a stop at a red light, Vivien turned toward her brother with a knowing look, "You say that like you won't be spending hours upon hours researching some cryptid or something with Markus in the hotel room." Peering in the rear-view mirror, Vivien found Abby's gaze and said, "And, Abby, we all know that you and Brynna will spend your time playing with her little siblings instead of just hanging out."

Abby opened her mouth to argue but quickly shut it again as she let out a soft sigh, "Yeah, I guess you're right." 

"Just because it's spring break doesn't mean we somehow magically turn into party animals once we're on vacation," Vivien claimed with a shrug as the light turned green, and she continued onward. "We've been ingrained to be responsible regardless of where we are, but I'm sure we'll all still have fun being boring with our friends."

Although they constantly joked about going to big house parties at their friends' houses and getting absolutely trashed on whatever alcohol they could find, none of the O'Brian siblings had actually ever gone to a big house party or willingly gotten drunk. Most of the people at their school weren't interested in big parties either as it would be increasingly difficult to get all of their friends in one town. Since their school was regional, kids from towns almost an hour away would be shuttled in on the handful of school-choice buses, making it hard for big parties to really be a thing. Besides, many, if not all, of the friends the O'Brians had made at the school were relatively introverted kids who cared more about their studies than getting wasted, making their running joke of getting drunk with their friends even more preposterous.

Abby peered out the window at the rain as Oliver said, "You know, I kind of like that we're boring."

"Oh, yeah?" Vivien asked, glancing at her brother as she checked whether or not she could cross through the intersection.

"Mhm," Abby nodded in agreement.

"It means our parents let us hang out with pretty much anyone without really caring," Oliver claimed. "Even if our plans were to go out and do dumb stuff at a friend's house, they wouldn't think anything of us going over there."

Abby thought for a moment before saying, "That's true, but we also would feel pretty bad if we took their trust in us for granted."

This time, it was Vivien's turn to hum in agreement, "Yeah."

For the first time since her parents gave her permission to join their neighbors in their house in California, Vivien felt wary about her decision. Although she knew that they had no qualms about her going to California as they had known the Birch family longer than Vivien had been alive, they had no idea about the other universe they would be taking her to. She had no plans of telling them about it as she had promised to keep it a secret from literally everyone she knew, but the thought that she was, for the first time in her life, taking advantage of her parents' trust to go off galavanting in a world they had no idea about. Even though she had no plans of doing anything wrong or illegal while there, a knot began to form in her stomach at the idea of letting her parents down for keeping such a large secret from them.

Taking a deep breath as she pulled onto their street, Vivien pushed her thoughts aside, allowing her excitement to fill her once more. She could worry about it later when she had Mick to talk her through every insignificant problem her mind could sprout up. For now, she had to get ready for the trip, and with a limited amount of time to get all of her clothes folded, she needed to focus on that. As Vivien's blue Kona pulled into the driveway, their mother stepped outside with a few umbrellas, making her way to the end of the walkway and waiting for Viviebn's car to stop. As soon as the car was in park, Chelsea held her umbrella over the passenger's door and opened it, handing her son an umbrella as he stepped out with his backpack.

Wrapping her cardigan tightly around herself, Abby tapped Vivien's arm and said, "I'll take your metal stuff in so it doesn't get wet."

"Are you sure?" Vivien asked in return as Abby handed her the purple backpack she had kept an eye on during the trip home. "I can take it."

"That's okay," she replied. Once the front passenger's door closed, she quickly took hold of the Walmart bag's handles and added, "I don't think Mom bothered to bring out your umbrella, and I don't want them to get wet."

Hoping to save her sister from having to lug the heavy bag inside, Vivien tried to gently argue, "I'm parking in the garage, Abs, it's not a long walk to the door."

"That's okay," Abby shrugged. "I've already got it. I'll bring it up to your room for you."

Before Vivien could say anything to the contrary, Abby grinned, pushed open her door, and slid out, taking and opening the umbrella her mom handed her before slamming the door and rushing to the house with their mother not far behind. Left with her mouth still open, Vivien breathed, "Thanks," before shaking her head fondly and pressing the button to open the garage. Once her car was parked in the spot furthest from the door, Vivien slid out of her seat, pulling her backpack with her. Glancing out at the pouring rain, the brunette sighed, hauling her backpack onto one shoulder and gripping her keys in her free hand as she rushed into the downpour with a squeal, closing the overhead door with a single click as she raced toward the front door of the house.

Once inside, she closed the door, grateful for the warmth of the house, as she trudged her way to the coat closet and began taking off her now-soaked sneakers. Loki soon joined her on the floor, licking the water from her cheeks as she tossed her sneakers onto the drying rack alongside her siblings' shoes. Running her hands through the dog's fur, Vivien felt herself calm as she thanked the dog for his warm welcome. Pushing herself from the floor, Vivien ascended the stairs with her backpack and her Saint Bernard, grateful her bedroom was near the landing, as Loki shoved his way into her room and onto her bed. With a sigh, Vivien rolled her eyes at the oversized puppy and dropped her backpack onto the floor at the end of her bed, plopping herself onto her mattress as she debated how much time she had to pack.

Not even a minute into her procrastination party, Abby stepped into the room without so much as a knock, snickering at her older sister's dawdling as she passed by. "You know, lying there like a limp spaghetti noodle isn't going to help your bags get packed."

"Okay, Mom," Vivien huffed with a smirk, missing the way Abby visibly winced at being compared to their mother. Taking in a heavy breath, Vivien pushed herself from the bed and sighed, "Is it weird that I'm not ready for this now that I'm leaving?"

"Not really," Abby shrugged as her sister entered the closet and pulled her suitcase down from the top shelf. "You get this way before out-of-state competitions too."

"This is different from comps," Vivien said as she placed her suitcase on the end of her bed and opened the shell. "I don't usually go far without you guys."

Stepping up behind her sister, Abby placed a hand on the older girl's back and smiled once she had Vivien's attention, "You'll have tons of fun and you know it. I'm sure you'll forget all about us once you land."

"That's impossible, Abs," Vivien breathed, pulling the lighter-haired brunette into a hug. "I love you guys too much to not miss you."

Lifting her head enough to see her sister's face, Abby replied, "Trust me, you'll be sick of us by the end of the week. Dad will keep you updated with pictures of Loki every morning like he does when we go to camp, I'll send you pictures of the lodge and everything interesting I see, and I'm sure Olly will send you paragraphs of random facts he and Markus found online while they're away. By the end of vacation, you'll be so sick of us that you'll want to get away the minute you come home."

Vivien laughed, "Probably, yeah."

Stepping out of her sister's hold, Abby grinned and said, "Now, come on, we have packing to do."

Allowing her sister to take the reins, Vivien headed into her closet to figure out what clothes she wanted to bring, hauling her plastic bins of summer clothes down from the top shelf as Abby headed into her en-suite bathroom to pack up the essentials Vivien had typed out on her phone. Once Vivien had fished out a handful of clothes she wanted to bring, she brought them to her desk and dropped them in a heap in her chair. By the time Abby finished getting stuff out of the bathroom and into the suitcase, Vivien was halfway done folding her clothes, something Abby had helped finish in record time. After reassuring her sister that she would be borrowing swimwear from Mick's closet upon her arrival, Vivien threw a couple of pairs of shoes into the mesh pouch on the lid alongside her journal and the astronaut-shaped galaxy projector she kept on her bedside table as a nightlight.

With her packing done quicker than she had anticipated, Vivien sent a text to Mick that she was all set before grabbing a dry hoodie from her closet and hauling the suitcase to the main floor of the house, leaving it near the coat closet so that she could slip on some shoes and get out the door as quickly as possible. Once everything was in place, she and Loki joined her siblings in the living room, where Oliver had begun setting up Mario Kart on the Switch. Sitting in the space the twins had left for her, Vivien took the purple joy-con from the coffee table and slouched into the comfort of the couch cushions as Loki took his place on the floor by her feet.

As she chose her usual character, Yoshi, Vivien's phone dinged, and she pulled it out of her pocket, giving her siblings the chance to argue over who got Baby Bowser. Unlocking her phone, she opened her dad's text and smiled. Peering over Abby's head to where their mother was leaning against the kitchen counter, sipping at her freshly-made smoothie while she presumably scrolled through her Facebook, Vivien rolled her eyes and went back to her conversation, thanking their dad for his offer of dinner and asking if he could pick them up their usual McDonald's orders before tucking her phone between her thigh and the couch and picking up her joy-con once again. Breaking up her siblings' argument with ease, Vivien started the game. Once they figured out who got which character, the three of them quickly got immersed in their battle for the first place.

As Oliver overtook Vivien for second place in Coconut Mall, leading the oldest of the siblings to cuss him out and jab him with her elbow, the front door slammed shut, alerting the whole house to the new visitor. Loki let out a bark as he rose from the floor, abandoning his post as the protector in favor of following the smell of french fries and cheeseburgers to the front door. The kids called out greetings to their father as they entered the final lap of their race, getting a chuckled response as Damien made his way through the entryway to the kitchen. Damien set the flimsy drink tray and paper bags plastered with golden arches on the kitchen counters, ignoring the look his ex-wife sent him as he began pulling fries and boxes from the bags and setting them out according to which family member had ordered what.

By the time the kids had finished their race, Chelsea had begun arguing with Damien about the quality of the food he had brought home, but the man seemed unbothered by her attitude, pushing aside her frustrations as the children approached. Stepping aside to allow them access to their meals, Damien accepted quick hugs from each of his children and asked them how their school days had been before following them to the living room. As Abby began to explain how her usually strict English teacher had them watch a movie as he had a migraine, Vivien sat cross-legged in her usual space on the far end of the couch and put one of the throw pillows over her lap so that the plate she put her food onto wouldn't fall.

After her siblings had rambled about their days, Damien turned to Vivien and asked, "What about you, babygirl? Anything fun happen today?"

Vivien shrugged, swallowing her mouthful of french fries before replying, "Not really. I signed up for the battle bot tournament after class."

Before her father could say anything, Abby butted in, "Alix said they saw you at the first round of auditions for the musical. I told them there was no way 'cause you hate being on stage, but they said it was true."

"It was," Vivien admitted before taking a bite of her burger.

Oliver choked on his chicken nugget, coughing a few times before swallowing thickly and asking, "Wait, seriously?"

Nodding, Vivien dipped her sandwich in a pile of ketchup and said, "Yeah. Emily wanted to audition, but didn't want to go alone, so I stepped in. It's not that big of a deal."

"It's a huge deal!" Abby squawked, twisting so that she could see her sister better. "Alix said the drama teachers were thinking of cancelling the other auditions because of you."

"Bull," Vivien scoffed, carefully avoiding the rest of her accusatory cuss as she felt the growing heat of her mother's gaze. "It wasn't even a meaningful audition. I sang some ABBA and ran for the hills; there's nothing impressive about that."

"But Alix said-"

"Alix could have heard wrong," Vivien argued, cutting off her sister's statement before it could spiral out of control. "Besides, even if they do choose me - which they won't - I'll just step down and let the understudy take whatever role I get."

"That would be for the best," Chelsea stated as she stabbed her fork into the grilled chicken salad her ex-husband had bought for her. "We've all seen how you get on stage at your grandparent's camp; putting you in any leading role in front all those people would be so much worse."

Ignoring their mother's statement with a roll of his eyes, Oliver turned to Vivien and said, "You can't back down."

Vivien grinned, sending her brother a curious look as she asked, "Why not?"

"Because!"

"That's not a reason, Olly."

"But it is," Oliver claimed. "We've all heard you sing in the car and you love theatre. This is your chance to see what it's like on Boadway."

"Who says I want to be on Broadway?" Vivien asked with a laugh.

Oliver thought for a moment before saying, "Well, nobody, but-"

"But the school is petitioning to get the Titanic Musical for the April show next year," Damien piped up, eyeing his eldest daughter out of his peripheral vision as she froze, her handful of ketchup-soaked french fries hanging in midair as she processed his claim. Smirking, he added, "If you have at least one show under your belt, they might consider you for one of the primary roles when the time comes."

Excitedly watching the wheels turn in Vivien's head, Abby grabbed her sister's free wrist and wiggled it as she said, "See! If you back down now, you'll never get to be in Titanic next year."

Vivien sighed, green eyes shifting from mild annoyance to fondness as she turned to her younger sister and slipped her fingers between Abby's, "As much as I would love that, there's no chance of me getting the lead."

"Would you at least try out for Titanic next year?" Oliver asked. "That would be right up your alley."

With a snort, Chelsea chortled, "She would probably spend all her time critiquing the accuracy of everything."

"Actually," Vivien began, finding a sliver of courage to meet her mother's gaze, "the show is fairly accurate when it comes to representing the people aboard the ship that night. The historical details are only slightly manipulated to add more drama, and-"

"See," Chelsea began, glancing between her children and ex-husband, "she's already at it."

Abby opened her mouth to argue, but Vivien's grip on her hand tightened, telling her to back down before things could get worse. Abby's bluish-brown eyes found Vivien's emerald gaze, and with a shake of her head, Abby resigned, returning to her food with a barely audible sigh. Refusing to let their last family dinner before spring break be soured by the cutthroat words of his ex-wife, Damien took the remote from the coffee table and switched the input back to the Roku before letting the kids decide between two of the movies on their watchlist - The Outsiders and The Truman Show.

With the rather unanimous vote of The Truman Show, the family settled in once more and relaxed as they watched Jim Carrey's character come to life. Not long into the movie, Abby shifted between Vivien and their father, and it wasn't long before she was sprawled out over the two with her head on Vivien's lap and her legs on their dad's. Once Abby had settled into a comfortable position, Vivien began absentmindedly running her fingers through the girl's lighter hair, calming both of them at once as Truman watched his dad get shoved into a bus and taken away. However, further into the movie, as Truman began drawing a spacesuit around his reflection, Vivien's phone began to ring, and she quickly stood, shoving a somewhat disgruntled Abby off her lap and taking her trash with her to the kitchen before answering the phone. 

After checking the caller ID, she smiled, tossed her trash into the bin next to the refrigerator, and quietly said, "Please tell me you're on your way."

A snort came from the other end as Mick replied, "Hello to you, too. I mean, damn, child, are you that willing to run away from home?"

Vivien glanced at her family and chuckled, "Maybe a little."

"Well, good," Mick replied. "We're pulling into the driveway now, so come out when you're ready."

Snickering to herself, Vivien said, "I thought you already knew I was bi, Mickie."

"Look, rugrat," Mick snipped, though Vivien could clearly hear the humor in her tone. "We're parked by the garage, but bring a rain coat or something; it's pouring."

"Still?"

"Yup."

Vivien sighed, "Alright, I'll be out in a few." She sucked in a deep breath and smiled to herself as Mick hung up her end of the call. Vivien headed back to the living room and grinned as she noticed Oliver holding the remote, keeping the movie paused until her return. Ruffluing her brother's hair, she cooed, "Aww, Olly-bear! Did you pause the movie just for me?"

Shoving her hand away, Oliver ran his hand through his hair and scoffed, "No, I just didn't want to have to rewind it for you."

"Yeah, sure," Abby drawled sarcastically as she punched her twin's thigh.

Chuckling as the twins began arguing over Oliver's ability - or lack thereof - to show kindness, Damien twisted in his seat, found Vivien's gaze, and asked, "Was that Mick and her parents?"

"Yeah, they just pulled up," Vivien nodded, glancing toward the front door.

With a smile, he asked, "Are you ready to go, babygirl?"

Vivien excitedly nodded, but her excitement seemed to dim as Chelsea asked, "Go where, exactly?"

"To California," Vivien explained. "You know, for spring break?"

"I never said you could go," Chelsea stated, finally looking up from her phone with steely eyes. "A trip like that requires planning, and I highly doubt you, of all people, are prepared to fly three thousand miles across the country for a week in some random city you've never been to."

Before Vivien could argue, Damien turned to his ex and said, "She asked both of us months ago, and, actually, she's had everything planned out since I gave her permission. Vivien's a smart girl; she wouldn't jump into something without proper planning."

"She even helped Abs and I plan our trips with our friends," Oliver piped up.

Placing a hand on her dad's shoulder and glancing toward her brother, Vivien thanked him with a smile before turning toward their mom and saying, "And, since Dad gave me permission, I can go, right, Mom?"

Chelsea took in a deep breath, glancing between Damien and Vivien with a stare that would end wars, but finally, she picked up her phone and huffed, "Fine. Go."

Hoping to get out the door before her mother could change her mind again, Vivien began making her way to the door, only to hear footsteps rushing up behind her. Turning, Vivien smiled as Abby and Oliver jogged up to her, Abby wrapping her in a hug as Oliver stood to the side with a grin. Squeezing her older sister, Abby pleaded, "Take lots of pictures for me, sissy."

Letting out a breath of a laugh, Vivien waited until Abby stepped back before taking her keys from the hook by the door and pushing them into the palm of her sister's hand. At Abby's confused look, she said, "Can you put them in your lockbox for me? I don't want Mom to use my car while I'm gone just 'cause it has lower mileage than hers."

Nodding in understanding, Abby softly asked, "Do you want your diary in there too?"

Vivien shook her head, "I'm taking it with me, but thank you."

Oliver shuffled closer, hinting at his desire for a final hug before his oldest sister's departure as he asked, "What about your fancy rocks?"

Wrapping her arms around Oliver's shoulders, she replied, "I took a few with me, but I doubt Mom will do anything with them because most of the ones I left are big and would be obvious if they went missing."

"If you're sure," Oliver mumbled into Vivien's shoulder before patting her back and slipping out of her grasp.

Once she took a step back, Vivien reached into her pocket and pulled out two colorful crystals, holding one out to either of her siblings, "For Abby, some charoite. It's good for keeping away negativity and helping you see a new side of yourself. Hopefully, it'll help you relax while you're away."

Abby smiled at the purple rock, shifting it in the light to see the different hues before thanking her sister and pocketing the crystal. Then, with a roll of his eyes and a smirk, Oliver accepted the smooth green lump and said, "Let me guess, this is some hard-to-pronounce rock too."

"Actually, no," Vivien snickered. "It's green aventureine and it's good for creativity, luck, and opportunities. I figured, with all the activities you'll be doing, and the theories you'll be picking apart, it would be nice to take with you."

Rolling the crystal around in his palm, Oliver allowed his smirk to spread into a smile as he handed Vivien her raincoat and said, "Have fun in Cali, Vivi."

Vivien smiled but didn't have the chance to respond as her father entered the room and said, "She will. Brady and Mack reassured me that they had a fun week planned."

Finding her dad's tired eyes, Vivien slotted herself in his arms and asked, "Will you be alright here without us for a week?"

"I'll be fine," Damien claimed as he ran a soothing hand over Vivien's hair. "Your mother is going on one of her work trips on Monday, so I'll be alone most of the time you kids are away."

Peering up at her father, Vivien smiled, "A week of empty-nesting, huh? That'll be interesting for you."

Damien pressed a kiss to Vivien's forehead and smiled, "It'll be over before I know it. Now, do you have everything?" Vivien nodded. "Are you sure? You've got your toothbrush, hairbrush?"

"I'm sure, Dad," Vivien chuckled. "And, before you ask, yes, I have the taser pen Riven's dad gave me. I took the batteries out and everything, just like he taught me."

Nodding, Damien sighed, "Good. I know I'm overthinking this, but I don't want you to be in a strange city without protection."

"I know," Vivien said with a knowing smirk. "And I don't blame you. It would be stupid of me to go without anything."

Damien hummed before smiling at his oldest girl, "I had your sister sneak something into your bag from the three of us, but promise me you won't open it until you get where you're going and have the chance to settle in."

Glancing at her sister, wondering when she could have slipped something into her luggage, Vivien smiled and said, "I won't, I promise."

"Good," he said, more for himself than his daughter. Then, patting her arm, Damien told Vivien, "Alright, well, get going before I chicken out."

"Alright, alright," Vivien snickered as she rolled her eyes up at her dad. "I'm going."

Allowing his daughter to step away and pull the zipper of her raincoat up as far as it would go, Damien pulled up her suitcase handle and held it out for her to take as he breathed, "Have fun, sweetheart."

"I'll try."

Placing a hand over Vivien's, he smiled, "You will." Once Vivien nodded in agreement, he requested, "Let us know when you land, okay?"

"Of course," Vivien beamed, anticipation bubbling up in her chest as she nodded excitedly. "I'll let you know when we get to their house too."

As Oliver opened the door and Vivien stepped out, Abby said, "I'll let Mom know you said goodbye."

Vivien crossed the threshold of the house and dragged her luggage with her, waving to the Birches and saying, "Thanks. I'll see you guys in ten days."

"Have fun!" Abby called as Vivien rushed through the rain to the Birch family's minivan.

"Enjoy the sun!" Damien said as Brady helped Vivien haul her suitcase into the trunk before closing it.

"Don't get wasted on the beach!" Oliver added, earning him a middle finger from his oldest sister and a tap on the back of the head from their dad. "What?" he asked rhetorically as Vivien hopped into the van and rolled the window down. "I'm just saying."

As the vehicle began to roll down the driveway, Vivien leaned out as far as the seatbelt would allow and yelled, "Love you!"

As her family called back in kind, Vivien rolled up the window and relaxed in her seat, earning a chuckle from Mick as the older brunette greeted her, "You look like a wet dog."

Laughing breathlessly, Vivien pushed her stringy, wet bangs away from her forehead and sighed, "I probably smell like one too, to be honest with you."

Mick pretended to sniff the air before grinning, "Only a little bit."

Vivien smiled and tipped her head to the side, finding Mick's gaze as she sighed, "I hope I don't look like a drowned rat when Royce sees me."

Mack laughed from the passenger's seat, leaning over the center console to see Vivien as she reassured her, "You won't, sweetheart. We'll make sure of it."

"I mean," Brady drawled as he pulled out onto the main roads, seemingly weighing his options until Mack slapped his arm with the back of her hand.

"Brady!"

"Kidding!" the man chuckled, somewhat proud of his playful jibe as the girls in the backseat snickered.

Vivien sighed contentedly as she relaxed into the van's faded, somewhat worn fabric seats, "I've missed this."

"You won't be saying that for long," Mack claimed. "By the end of the first week, you'll be begging us to send you home."

"Doubtful," Vivien replied with a smile. The idea of spending any length of time in the world Mick had been talking her ear off about since the day she discovered it back in December had been like something of a fantasy for Vivien. Now that she actually had the chance to see the places in her friends' pictures, the thought of cutting her stay short for anything other than the most dire circumstances was bizarre. "I'm pretty sure you'll have to drag me away kicking and screaming."

"Well, we certainly won't be doing that," Brady laughed.

"Yeah," Mick agreed, taking Vivien's hand with a brilliant smile. "You can stay there with us for as long as you want."

"And time here won't change, right?" Vivien recounted.

"Right," Mack agreed. "That machine will allow you to stay as long as you like without anything changing."

Mick nodded, watching Vivien's thoughtful eyes flicker behind her circular frames as she explained, "We turn the time control mechanism off while we're in this world so that they can enjoy life normally there, but we freeze time here so that we can enjoy things without having to go back and forth to pay bills and stuff like that."

Vivien grinned, "Like taking random teenagers into different dimensions without their parents feeling the need to call everypolice department in the tate to see if they can send out search parties?"

"I guess you could say that," Brady snorted as he pulled onto the turnpike and pressed the gas pedal further toward the floor.

The conversation seemed to split from there as Mack pulled up the directions to the airport on her phone, telling Brady to slow down before they reached a particular spot the state troopers liked to park in order to catch people speeding on the turnpike. Watching trees and distant buildings fly by as the car sped up, Vivien pulled her phone out of her pocket and unlocked the Discord chat she had with her bandmates, sending them a selfie of herself and Mick before hastily typing a message about them finally being on the road.

Erica was the first to respond - her text of "bitch, you bettr not become a fuckign valley girl!" appearing just before Riven's "Have fun, Pip! Don't get eaten by a shark; I need you for comp" and followed soon after by Jade's ever-calm message of, "ignore their bs. we love you. stay safe. xoxo." Vivien snickered as the trio began blowing up her phone; Erica starting an argument with Riven about sharks being harmless while also telling Jade to fuck off for being the responsible one.

"You good over there?" Mick asked, her humor evident as Vivien glanced up from her phone.

Holding out the device and leaning over so that they could both watch the drama unfold, Vivien explained, "Erica's being a bitch, Riven is a sarcastic shit, and Jade's acting like a mother hen, so Erica picked a fight with both of them."

Mick watched as Erica sent a wall of text that only consisted of the middle finger emoji, snickering, "So, a normal day, then?"

"Pretty much," Vivien agreed. As they watched conversation bubbles appear and Erica's rant spiral into nonsense, her smile faltered. She would miss them while she was away. Even when her family went on vacations, Riven would go with them, and she could text the girls anytime she wanted. This time, her ability to message them and ask them for advice on things would be revoked the minute she entered the other world. With a heavy sigh, she admitted, "I'm going to miss them."

Taking in the girl's expression, Mick reached up and placed a hand on Vivien's back, rubbing circles into her plastic raincoat as she said, "It'll suck for a few days, but after a while, you sort of get used to it."

Peering up at the older girl, Vivien allowed herself to smile, "You're talking from experience, aren't you?"

"Sadly," Mick confirmed. "My instincts were to take pictures of everything to show my friends when I got back, but then I realized I couldn't. It took a while to adjust and my phone is still full of pictures nobody else has seen, but after a while, I got used to just saving the memories for myself."

Nodding in understanding, Vivien breathed, "Yeah, I guess you're right. I can send them some pictures when I get back, but until then, I can keep them to myself."

Pivoting in her seat, Mick turned toward Vivien and asked, "So, what are your plans for Royce? Are we doing a casual surprise where you just walk in and say hi or are we doing something grand in front of everyone?"

"I don't know," Vivien shrugged. "I haven't really given it a lot of thought. I was more concerned about my mom keeping me from going."

"Well, now we've got time to think it through!" Mick exclaimed, clapping her hands together.

“Not much time,” Mack explained. “We’ll be at the airport in about five, maybe ten minutes, and since we have a private flight, we’ll be in the air within the hour.”

“You guys never told me you have a private jet,” Vivien stated. “Like, I knew you guys had money, but damn.”

“It’s not ours,” Mick shrugged.

“One of my friends from school became a pilot,” Brady explained. “He’s offered us free trips whenever we need it since he knows how often we travel to the East coast and it gives him the opportunity to visit some family of his in Vermont.”

Vivien hummed, more to herself than to anyone in the vehicle, “That’s nice of him.”

After a moment of relative silence, Mick patted Vivien’s hand and told her, “Anyway, regardless of what you decide to do, Royce will be surprised.”

“You think?” Vivien asked. “I thought someone would have told him by now.”

Mick shook her head emphatically, beaming proudly as she explained, “Actually, I haven’t told anybody that you’re coming.”

Vivien’s eyes glittered with excitement as she asked, “Seriously?”

Mick nodded, her wavy hair bouncing with the movement, “The only person who knows is Butchy, and he’s not one to spill things like that.”

“That’s insane!” Vivien exclaimed, a laugh tumbling from her lips at the thought of surprising her friends with her sudden appearance in their world.

“I know, right!” Mick giggled. “But that means we have endless possibilities for surprising people. It all depends on where they are at the time.”

“When we land, it will be about one in the morning, Pacific Time,” Mack explained. “On a commercial flight, we usually stop a few times along the way to swap planes or pick up new passengers, but since this is private, we’re going to stop in New Jersey for a few minutes due to busy airways, and then get back in the air.”

“That will give us plenty of time to think about it,” Mick said cheerfully.

“And give both of you the chance to sleep,” Brady reminded his daughter, peering at her in the rearview mirror before he pulled onto the street that led them to the airport. “We don’t need both of you to be zombies when we touch down.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Mick brushed off with a wave of her hand, her excitement over the whole situation outweighing the concept of sleep. “Anyway, I’ve got ideas for both options, and we can talk about them on the plane, if you want.”

Sending the older girl a smile and a nod, Vivien watched Mick smile and relax in her seat; pulling out her phone as Vivien took in a slow breath and glanced out the window. As they passed the Mall of New Hampshire, Vivien snapped a quick picture of the building and sent it to the group chart that had begun to quiet without her presence there to encourage the chaos, sending a cheeky message teasing the two girls who worked within the large, stucco and concrete building. Jade was the first to respond, her video message of her waving to the camera, arriving on Vivien’s phone as they pulled up to a gated parking lot. As Brady began speaking to the guard, listing the passengers and which flight they were on, Vivien sent a private message to Riven, telling him how nervous she was about being on a private plane.

‘You have nothing to worry about, Pip,’ was his reply. ‘The Birches know what they’re doing and wouldn’t put you in danger like that. Just breathe. You’ve got this.’

Sucking in a deep breath through gritted teeth, Vivien sent back a reply of gratitude and tried to relax as the car lurched forward and moved past the gate. Mack popped open the console between herself and Brady, pulling out a trio of passports before turning toward Vivien and asking, “Do you have your passport ready?”

Reaching under her rain coat and into the pocket of her hoodie, Vivien pulled the navy blue booklet out and handed it up to Mack, who added it to the stack in her hands. As they rolled down the tarmac, Vivien watched through the windows, trying to guess which aircraft they would be in. Narrowing it down the further they got, Vivien let out a noise of surprise as Brady turned to the side, lurching her toward the door as he pulled to a stop in a parking space. Looking around in confusion, Vivien followed the others out of the car, following Mack to the back of the vehicle, where they pulled their luggage from the trunk.

Mick grabbed Vivien’s free hand, pulling her toward a jet that had the door open and a set of stairs waiting. Pushing the handles of their suitcases down and picking them up by the straps on top, the girls boarded the plane, pushing their suitcases to the side to be scanned before finding seats to collapse into. Nudging Vivien into a window seat, Mick took the seat across from her and relaxed, waiting for her parents to board before instructing the younger girl to buckle up.

After the pilot came to greet them, telling them all the basics he needed to go over before the flight, he returned to the cockpit and announced that they would be leaving as soon as he had permission from the traffic control tower. With much reassurance from the others, Vivien began to relax, snapping pictures of the plane and the setting sun to send to her friends and family. After another announcement came over the speakers about taking off, they were in the air, and Vivien’s phone returned to her pocket as the seatbelt lights turned off. Peeling off her rain coat and shoving it into the seat next to her, Vivien huffed a sigh of relief as she realized the part she had worried about the most was now over.

Watching as the ground below grew smaller and harder to see, Vivien turned her attention to Mick, who had folded her arms on top of the table between them, leaning closer with a smile that told Vivien she didn’t want to know what the girl was going to get her into. “Do I want to know?” she asked the older brunette.

Vivien could hear the girl’s feet thumping against the base of her chair as she swung her legs back and forth, but Mick’s smile refused to dissipate as she explained, “I’ve been cooking up ideas for you.”

Nodding to herself, Vivien rolled her eyes, “Yup, didn’t want to know.”

Ignoring the girl’s statement, Mick said, “I was thinking-”

“That’s dangerous,” Brady chuckled from his seat on the opposite side of the plane.

“Dad,” Mick sighed dramatically. When the older man snickered and struck up a conversation with his wife, Mick turned her attention back to Vivien with a roll of her caramel eyes. “I figured that, once we land, we can-”

“Go to sleep?” Vivien interrupted.

“Ha!” Mick laughed. “No.”

“Yes,” Mack said, her motherly tone giving Mick little to no wiggle room as she deflated slightly.

“Okay, yeah, that too,” Mick relented. “But we can pick out some cute outfits from my closet and make sure you feel beautiful before we go.” Pointedly turning toward her mom, Micxk asked, “Right, Momma?”

“So long as you two aren’t up all night, yes,” Mack replied before taking a sip of the water bottle she had taken from the cabin’s mini fridge. “Now, Vivien, did you have anything to eat, sweetheart? They have sandwiches and things in the fridge, if you’d like.”

“That’s alright,” Vivien brushed off graciously. “Dad brought home some Mickey D’s on his way home from work.”

“I’m surprised he made it through the warden with that,” Brady said in a scoff.

Vivien smirked as the other two women gave their own forms of agreement, simply glad she wasn’t the only one who found her mother’s strict food control to be something of a nightmare. “Yeah, well, he didn’t exactly give her a choice. He came in, gave her a salad to shut her up, and let us get our meals without letting her anger break him down.”

“Good for him,” Mick grinned.

“Glad to know he’s finally growing bigger balls than hers,” Mack added. “I think we’ve all been placing bets to see how long that would take.”

With a hum of agreement, Vivien allowed the conversation to flow between topics, absentmindedly bringing up the subject of the battle bot project she wanted to work on when they got the chance, something that made Mick practically vibrate with excitement. Brady brought up the idea of using his tools if need be, which inspired Mick to go off on a spiel about possibly going to either Butchy’s or Miles’ place of work to utilize their welding kits and use some of the metal scraps they had tossed aside. By the time Mack had managed to pull them away from the topic at hand, they were starting to make their descent at an airport in Newark, New Jersey.

Before the plane took off again, Vivien sent a few relatively dark images and some quick messages to the people who knew she was leaving before stepping into the bathroom of the jet to call her aunts before they went to bed. They discussed the trip and spoke for a while about all of the activities Vivien was looking forward to before they wished each other a good night. Vivien promised to let them know when they landed before ending the call and scurrying back to her seat as the captain announced their approaching departure. Once they were back in the air and allowed to roam about, Mick showed Vivien how to recline her seat and find a comfortable position to sleep in before offering the girl a blanket and promptly passing out in her chair.

One by one, Vivien watched as the Birch family succumbed to the land of dreams, but despite her growing exhaustion and yawns tumbling from her mouth every other minute, she couldn’t find it in herself to actually sleep. She could have easily chalked up her inability to sleep to her nerves, but that wasn’t quite right. Somewhere deep inside her, she knew that there was nothing to worry about. Royce and Bentley would love to drag her around, Carrie had promised to take her to the lot they were filming on if she ever found herself in their world, and even Butchy and Miles had discussed dragging her to their respective jobs to show her knowledge of old vehicles off to their respective coworkers. There was nothing for her to be worked up over.

Forcing herself to take in a deep breath and push her unfounded fears aside, Vivien allowed another yawn to overtake her as she stretched. Reclining her seat and tugging her blanket around her shoulders, Vivien slouched into a more comfortable position, tucked her cell phone into her pocket, set her glasses on the table between herself and Mick’s slumbering form, and waited until the soft humming of the plane’s machinery lulled her to sleep. To her dismay, what felt like only a few minutes passed before Vivien found herself being gently shaken awake, grumbling at the interruption as she rubbed the sleep from her eyes.

A chuckle came from a blurry form as Vivien searched blearily for her glasses, listening to the person apologize in a soft voice before handing her the glasses she was searching for. Finally peering up at the person, Vivien found Brady smiling back at her, offering her a hand as he told her, “We just landed, kiddo. Time to go home.”

Chuckling exhaustedly as she stretched herself out like a cat rising from a comfortable position in the summer sun, Vivien muttered, “Am I too old to ask for someone to carry me?”

Brady let out another soft laugh, “Never, but I haven’t carried anybody in years, and I’d rather not drop you down the stairs of a plane.”

Vivien snorted and pushed herself from her seat, “Yeah, let’s not do that, then.”

“Smart girl,” Mack advised, patting the teenager on the back as she passed her on her way back from the bathroom.

As Brady worked on waking Mick from her slumber, Vivien folded up the blanket she had used, made sure she had everything she brought with her, and followed Mack to the front of the plane, where they received their belongings. Yawning as she followed Mack down the stairs, Vivien welcomed the warm California air with a tired grin. “It’s nice out,” she muttered as Mack led her toward a pale blue Jeep that had been brought onto the tarmac for them.

Accepting her car keys from the driver who brought the car over, Mack chuckled, “My phone says it’s fifty-something right now.”

More than content with the idea of the summer-like weather, Vivien sighed happily as she hauled her suitcase into the trunk of the car alongside Mack’s, “Like I said, I think you guys will have to drag me kicking and screaming from this place.”

Bringing an arm around Vivien’s shoulders, Mack smiled, “Just wait until you see how close we are to the beach.”

Vivien’s eyes glittered as the woman brought her to the side of the car, encouraging her to climb inside as Mack slid into the driver’s seat. However, before she climbed inside the vehicle, Vivien pulled out her phone and took a picture of the plane they landed in, sending it to the group chat with her bandmates before sending a message to her family members, letting everyone know they had landed safely in Santa Ana and were on their way to the Birch family’s home. Once she was sure the messages had been sent, Vivien slid into the backseat behind Mack and pulled the seatbelt across her body. Once the others had found their way to the car, Mack started the engine and pulled away from the plane, heading through a series of gates before making her way to the street and pulling away from the John Wayne Airport.

Unable to fall back asleep as they pulled onto the San Diego Freeway, Vivien watched with wide eyes as she took in the glow of the city. Throughout the half-hour drive, Vivien took a myriad of pictures. Glowing palm trees, buildings in the distance that appeared to touch the sky, and, as the freeway pulled them through San Juan Capistrano toward the beach, pictures of a seemingly endless night sky over the water. Smiling as he watched the girl take another picture, Brady encouraged his wife to take the long way home without saying a word, and Mack took the next exit, pulling onto Pacific Coast Highway and following it until the first set of lights she could turn at. At the next intersection, she turned onto Park Lantern and followed the street toward the water until it merged with Coast Highway.

The couple suppressed their laughter as Vivien gasped, leaning over their daughter to take pictures of the water that was still covered by a blanket of stars in the nighttime sky. Once houses began to block her view, Vivien relaxed, but her excitement was still very much palpable as the car glided down the highway. Turning toward the backseat, Brady kept his voice hushed as they slowed to a stop at a red light, “If you want a good shot, our street sign is right up here.”

“Really?” Vivien whispered.

Brady hummed in confirmation, “It’s on the light post up here on your side.”

Sure enough, as Vivien leaned closer to her window and squinted up at the post, she found a green sign with the words “Camino Capistrano” in thick, white writing. Although her cell phone refused to see the sign in the dark, Vivien smiled and kept her eyes on it until they had turned onto the aforementioned street and could no longer see the sign. Smiling more to herself than anything, Vivien watched with bated breath as Mack drove further up the street, past a traffic light, and through a curve. When they finally pulled to a stop in front of a fancy black gate with a Mediterranean-style roof and a few doors on either side, Vivien felt her jaw hit the floor.

Contrary to popular opinion, Vivien’s family had money. For a while in her childhood, her family had lived in an apartment that barely gave them enough room to live, but they had enough money to put food on the table and buy new things here and there. After her grandparents offered them the opportunity to move into their old house and take over the winery while they moved closer to their beloved summer camp, Vivien felt as though she was the luckiest person on the planet. While they weren’t exactly Elon Musk-level rich, the winery her parents operated and her grandparent’s summer camp made them more than financially secure. Knowing she had the chance to take on their jobs in the future, Vivien thought she would become richer than she had ever previously thought possible. However, as she got her first look at the Birch’s house, she realized she didn’t know shit about rich people.

Being well off on the East Coast meant having a home you owned, a car or two, and potentially a pet if you felt like it. Most people back home enjoyed taking up residence in old, colonial-style homes that would set them back a good hundred thousand dollars at least and were originally built for families with eleven or twelve children. East Coast wealth was classy, clean, and, well, antique. West Coast wealth, on the other hand, was a new kind of expensive. Stepping out of the car once they rolled to a stop in the four-car garage, Vivien couldn’t help but feel poor in every sense of the word.

Although Vivien had seen bits and pieces of the house over FaceTime with Mick, the sheer size of the house was astonishing. Following closely behind her friend, Vivien’s eyes scanned from the large, orange roof to the various balconies, to the swimming pool that seemed to wrap around the side of the house, and the various water guns and toys strewn about in the yard that were evidence that her friends from another world had visited before the Birches had come to collect her. Entering the house, Vivien waited for the lights to turn on before looking around at the pristine entryway. A large glass chandelier hung above the entrance, glimmering rays of light throughout the hall and part of the living room.

Although Vivien felt more than awake and ready to explore the luxurious home, Mack and Brady urged her to follow Mick upstairs once she had taken her shoes off by the door. Relenting despite her excitement, Vivien followed Mick up the hardwood stairs, grinning at the various childhood photographs of Mick and her friends along the wall as they climbed. Coming to the landing, Vivien found herself taken aback once more by the view. Across from the top of the stairs was a panoramic view of the beach across the street, a comfortable lounge area settled facing the floor-to-ceiling windows with a television mounted on the right wall - the only one without windows.

Before she could take a moment to process the kitchenette on one side of the staircase or the gaming area on the other, Vivien found herself taken by the wrist around the banister to a short hallway with three doors. They passed a room with Mick’s initial painted on the door, but Mick didn’t so much as glance toward her bedroom before opening the door to another room at the end of the hall and stepping aside for Vivien to enter.

With a yawn, the short brunette explained, “This used to be one of our guest rooms, but the boys usually take it when they stay with us, so a lot of Bentley art supplies and Royce’s books stay here.”

Looking up at the coffered, waffle-esque design on the ceiling and the various signs of life in the room, Vivien let out a disbelieving laugh, “This is insane.”

Mick took a look around and sighed at how poorly she had cleaned the room before leaving the week before, “Yeah, I know it’s not the cleanest right now, but we can pick everything up in the morning if you-”

“No, no, no!” Vivien said with a quick shake of her head, turning back toward her friend with a smile as she stood her suitcase by the end of the queen-sized bed. “Mick, you don’t understand.”

Confused in part by the conversation and part by her lack of sleep, Mick’s head tipped slightly to the side as she asked, “What do you mean?”

“I thought my house was big and that we were well off,” Vivien began, twirling around as she examined the room before finding Mick’s gaze again, “but I think yours just bitch-slapped my whole family onto the poverty line!”

Mick let out a snort, shaking her head fondly, “Well, don’t start comparing dick sizes just yet, gremlin. Save that for a time when I can actually think straight.”

“I hardly ever think straight,” Vivien smirked, taking a seat on the edge of the bed she had been given.

With a roll of her eyes and a fond smile, Mick teased, “Believe me, I know. Now, try to get some sleep. You don’t want jet lag to knock you out on your ass later.”

Raising her hand to her forehead in a mock salute, Vivien said, “Sir, yes, sir.”

Chuckling, Mick wished the younger girl a good night before disappearing into the hall, leaving the girl’s door open so that she could see the dimly lit lights in the hallway. Taking in a deep breath in the silence of her new room, Vivien hefted her suitcase onto the bed beside her and unzipped it, pulling out her astronaut lamp and setting it aside before tugging a pair of celestial pajama shorts and a matching tank top from one side of her suitcase. Picking up the luggage, she carried it over to a chair and left it open in the seat, changed into her pajamas, plugged in her lamp, and slipped under the covers with her headphones in one hand and phone in the other.

Putting on her headphones and listening to one of her favorite ASMR channels while watching the stars dance across the ceiling, Vivien finally found herself able to fall asleep relatively quickly. Dreams of surfing cerulean waves with her friends filled her night, and by the time the sun had begun poking through the curtains on either side of her bed, Vivien felt well-rested and ready to start her day. After hastily getting dressed in something appropriate for the eighty-three-degree weather her phone forecasted, Vivien took her time examining the house as she made her way down to the kitchen. Mick’s bedroom had already been vacated, and if the voices floating up the stairs were anything to go by, she was with her parents.

Making her way through the house to the kitchen, Vivien smiled as she listened to her friend’s family converse. The energy in the Birch’s house was always somewhat calming to Vivien, an environment where she could relax and feel at home regardless of what they were up to that day, but the feeling of belonging never wavered, no matter how far apart they truly were. Watching Mick dance around with her mother to the music on the radio, Vivien smiled as she leaned against the island counter. Brady nudged her arm as the song changed, beaming at the new addition to their household before offering her his hand. 

Without much hesitation, Vivien placed her hand in Brady’s and allowed him to lead her in a bouncy dance that twirled them around the kitchen as Vivien giggled. Mack and her daughter stopped after a while to watch the pair, listening to Vivien half-sing, half-shriek her way through the lyrics as Brady spun her around the kitchen with ease. As the song came to an end, he twirled Vivien away, grinning as she laughed over the voice of the radio host.

Once her vision had stopped spinning, Vivien giggled, “Good morning, America!”

Brady chuckled, “Good way to get the blood pumping early in the morning, right, kiddo?”

Vivien nodded, but it was Mack who spoke, “We find it’s nice to do something fun before you start your day.”

“Speaking of starting your day,” Mick began as Vivien climbed onto one of the stools on the side of the island, “are you feeling up to leaving yet?”

“Makana,” Mack scolded lightly, “let the poor girl wake up first.”

Vivien smiled as Mick sighed dramatically, but she shook her head as she turned to the older woman. “It’s alright, Mrs B. I think I’m too excited to be tired.”

Sighing as he opened the fridge, Brady said, “Well, that’s good because I think we’re going to have to have breakfast at Butchy and Lela’s house this morning.”

Mack appeared confused for a moment before realization dawned on her face, “We forgot to pick up food last night.”

Mick shrugged, “It was two in the morning.”

With a shake of his head, Brady turned to his daughter and asked, “Do you mind us using your kitchen?”

Before Mick could reply, Vivien asked, “Wouldn’t it be easier to go to Big Momma’s for breakfast since we have to go there anyway?”

“It would be,” Mick replied with a nod, “but by the time we pry Lela off of you, it’ll be time for lunch.” Turning back to her parents as Vivien nodded in understanding, she said, “Butchy and I can make up something while everyone gets settled in.”

Mack nodded and turned her attention back to Vivien before asking, “Would you like to go now, then? Do you have anything you would like to bring with you?”

Vivien thought for a moment before nodding, “I brought some stuff with me that I wanted to show everyone. Can I run up and grab it?”

“You don’t have to ask, Vivien,” Brady insisted. Nodding toward the stairs, he said, “Just go; we’ll still be here when you come back.”

As Vivien slid out of her seat, Mick patted her arm excitedly and said, “Just put your clothes on the bed and take your whole suitcase. I’m, like, ninety-three percent sure you’ll leave with more clothes than you came with.”

Her excitement surging at the idea, Vivien nodded and hurried for the stairs, bounding up them two at a time and pushing aside her desire to explore the large home as she headed for her room. Moving her suitcase from the chair she left it on to the end of her bed, Vivien began pulling out a majority of her daily clothes, leaving her essentials, headphones, charger cords, astronaut lamp, the envelope with her name on it that her siblings and father had given her before she left home, and a few items of clothing Carrie and Lela had let her “borrow” and never got back. Once she was certain she had everything she wanted to bring with her for however long she would be away, Vivien zipped up her bag and took in a deep breath. Glancing out the window at San Clemente, Vivien smiled at the knowledge that, within mere minutes, she would be transported into a world she had only ever heard in stories and seen in a movie.

Grabbing her suitcase by the handle, Vivien left her bedroom and headed for the stairs, lifting her bag before her descent and taking the handle once she’d reached the landing. Practically skipping to the kitchen, Vivien beamed at the Birches as she cheered, “Ready for liftoff!”

Happy to show off his work to a new person, Brady clapped his hands and gestured toward the sliding glass doors that led to the backyard, “After you, kiddo.”

Vivien took the lead, opening one side of the door and sucking in a sharp breath as she was hit full-force with the heat of Southern California. Mick snickered, wrapping an arm around Vivien and guiding her toward the shed at the back of their property as she chuckled, “Welcome to California.”

‘Ugh,” Vivien groaned, “is it always like this?”

“Not always, no,” Mick claimed, “but believe me, summers are much worse in Florida.”

Hoping the older girl was simply joking, Vivien remained quiet until Mick ushered her into the shed, and she was made to carefully toe her way around scrapped projects and stray tools until she reached the yellow, tube-shaped behemoth pressed securely against the back wall. A large flower Vivien recalled seeing on a surfboard hanging on the wall in the Birch’s home was engraved into metal at the very top of the machine, wires and metal bars sticking out behind it in a haphazard yet efficient way. Pulling the handle on the right side of the machine, Vivien stepped back as the rounded glass panel at the front slid back into the left side of the machine.

With a gentle nudge from Mack, Vivien stepped into the machine, followed soon after by the family who had brought her there. As the glass door slid closed again, Mick took her friend's free hand and told her to hang on to her belongings before instructing her to watch out the window to see things change around them. Somewhat cautious of the machine as it whirred to life, Vivien watched as a vibrant glow from above seemed to illuminate the otherwise dark mechanic's shed. A soft hum filled the air as colors began to swirl outside the machine, a kaleidoscope of hues coming to life in a vibrant array that faintly reminded Vivien of a show she had seen as a child. The colors grew brighter and more vibrant, rivaling the LED lights Vivien knew Oliver had lining his ceiling before slowly dimming and allowing Vivien to see her first glimpse of another world.

Although she didn't want to appear let down by the view she was given, Vivien couldn't help her quirked brow and immediate response of, "It's an old pickup in a dark garage. Cool."

Nudging her friend with her elbow, Mick stepped around her to open the door and snorted, "It's Butchy's. Now, come on."

Taken by the hand. Vivien was dragged into the house and pulled toward the kitchen, where running water could be heard just over the sound of Chubby Checker's song The Twist that played over the radio. As she came to a stop, Vivien felt a smile split her face as she took in the striped wallpaper and yellow cabinets, the vibrant colors of the room making it feel even more inviting than she thought it would. Tilting so she could see around Mick, Vivien held in a laugh with a hand over her mouth as Butchy turned off the faucet, and Lela's voice could be heard as she danced to the music beside him. It wasn't until the music came to an end and the radio host began speaking about the next song that the raven-haired girl noticed the new figures in her house.

Lela jumped and pressed a hand to her chest, her instinctive reaction to cuss out her sister-in-law cut short as she spotted the taller brunette standing behind Mick. Letting out a screech so shrill Butchy flinched behind her, Lela rocketed forward, all but shoving Mick out of the way in order to wrap her arms around her younger friend. Rocking Vivien from one side to the other, Lela excitedly asked, "What are you doing here?!"

"It's spring break back home," Vivien explained as Lela moved back just enough to squish her cheeks in her hands. With her lips resembling that of a goldfish, Vivien continued, "I wanted to surprise everyone."

Prying his sister's hands away from the sixteen-year-old's face, Butchy smiled, "If this is anything to go by, I think Royce might end up having a heart attack when he sees you."

"Let's hope not," Vivien chuckled somewhat nervously. "I don't particularly feel like killing him."

"Sure," Butchy chortled sarcastically. "You know, I've seen some of those crime shows you love so much, piccola. You'd be arrested in an instant if you tried to kill anyone."

Smirking, Vivien said, "First of all, I watch those enough to know how to not get caught at this point. And, second, one of these days, I'm going to figure out what you're calling me, big guy."

"I'm sure you will," Butchy grinned, allowing the girl to step forward and bring her arms around him as he ruffled her hair. "It's good to see you again, Viv."

Staring accusatorily at the man as she took a step back, Vivien asked, "Is the swear jar still in place here?"

Confused as to what that had to do with him being glad to see her, Butchy slowly nodded, "Yeah, why?"

"In that case," Vivien huffed, "I'd say it's nice to see you too, but maybe I shouldn't just yet."

"Oh yeah?" Butchy questioned. "Just because of the swear jar?"

"Mhm," Vivien nodded. "You keep that thing in place and I'll be broke by the end of my first week here."

Butchy chuckled, but before he could formulate a response to Vivien's jab, Lela spoke up, "You're staying for more than a week?"

Turning to the shorter girl, Vivien shrugged, "I was hoping to, if that's alright."

Mick chuckled as she began pulling things from the refrigerator, "She is. I don't think her staying is the problem."

"What do you mean?" Lela wondered.

Butchy stepped up to the counter to help Mick make breakfast before answering, "After letting the boys know she's here, it'll be nearly impossible for them to let her return home."

Lela breathed a noise of understanding before taking Vivien's hands and saying, "We need you to look as normal as possible before you go see the boys. How do you feel about borrowing something of mine?"

Smiling, Vivien nodded, "You're the boss."

As Lela let out a noise of excitement and began pulling her away, Butchy called out, "See you in three hours."

Vivien barely got the chance to look around on her way up to Lela's room, pulled up the stairs faster than she thought humanly possible as Lela began babbling about all the things she wanted to do with the younger girl. Although the girl's excitement was evident, Vivien couldn't help but feel astonished at how fast Lela could talk when she was happy. As Lela pulled her into her bedroom, Vivien couldn't help but look around in wonder at how different it was from the movie. Despite everything looking fairly similar, there were touches of modernity that stood out against the mid-century style of the room - pictures from modern times that had made it back in the girl's luggage, an old iPod Vivien was sure Mick had given her, and some items strewn about that Vivien recalled seeing the older girl buy in her world.

Before Vivien could ask her about anything she saw, Lela pulled her over to the closet, where she revealed a room that had Vivien convinced she had somehow ended up transported to Mia Thermopolis's closet from the second Princess Diaries movie. Two plush chairs sat against the far wall, racks of clothes illuminated by little dome lights lined the walls, and shelves of shoes and accessories filled the empty space. Lela scanned the racks of clothing as Vivien looked around in wonder, picking up a pair of oversized sunglasses with a smile before setting them down and moving on to the shoes.

Moving with practice ease through her color-coordinated clothing, Lela pulled clothes down by their hangers and began stacking them on her chair. Once she felt satisfied by the selection she had laid out, Lela turned to Vivien and smiled as the girl looked at herself in the mirror with a pair of elbow-length gloves, cat-eye sunglasses, and a large sunhat that flopped in front of her face. Stepping up behind the girl, Lela said, "Time to play dress-up."

Vivien giggled, pulling the sunhat off of her head and lowering the sunglasses as she said, "I think I already am."

"And you look fabulous," Lela claimed with a smile before stepping aside and gesturing to the clothes on one of her chairs. "However, I put aside some clothes for you to try on."

"Ooh," Vivien sang as she turned around, setting her accessories aside in favor of the large pile. As Lela began setting things in their rightful places, Vivien picked through the clothing and quickly found herself lost in the myriad of colors, fabrics, and styles. "You want me try on all of this?"

Lela glanced at the dainty watch on her wrist that her uncle had gifted her for her birthday before answering, "Well, I think we'll only have time for a few before they bring us something to eat, but yeah."

Shifting a pair of shorts onto the arm of the chair, Vivien mused, "I'm surprised you didn't want me in a dress today."

"Normally," Lela began as she made up the distance between herself and the brunette, "I would have, but where most of my dresses would be far too short on you, I figured we could make up for that at the shops later. For now, I figured pedal pushers, tees, and some shorts would be more comfortable for you."

"You're definitely not wrong," Vivien smiled. Turning to the older girl, she asked, "Where should I try these on?"

"Right here," Lela beamed, unhooking a curtain from the wall and letting it fall between herself and Vivien. "If you find anything you feel suits you for the day, let me know and I'll come help you look for accessories. In the meantime, I'll be doing my morning skincare."

Excitement flowed through her like an ice-cold drink on a hot summer day, and Vivien thanked Lela before turning toward her pile of clothing and sorting through everything. Setting aside bottoms she could put together with various tops, Vivien began picking out options and trying them on, examining her reflection before trying on something new. After trying on different outfits for a while, Vivien finally settled on one - a pair of striped, white and lavender shorts with a matching purple tank top that covered far more skin than that of the tank tops back home. Lela was quick to offer assistance with the rest of the outfit, deeming Vivien's classic, black and white, doodle-covered Converse acceptable before selecting a handful of necklaces and bracelets for the brunette to choose between.

Once they had taken a break to eat breakfast, Lela began working her magic on Vivien's hair. After making sure her bangs were separated from the rest of her hair by a curler, Lela brushed out Vivien's hip-length locks before pulling them up into a ponytail and securing them with not only an elastic but also a ribbon. Lela curled the very ends of Vivien's ponytail so that it all ended in a uniform ring before spraying it down with enough hairspray to poke a hole in the ozone layer and pulling the curler out from under Vivien's bangs. 

Grinning in disbelief at her reflection in Lela's vanity, Vivien thanked Lela for putting in more effort than she ever did back home, "I could never do anything like this."

"You could," Lela argued as she placed the cover back on her canister of hairspray and set it on the corner of her vanity. "It just takes practice, that's all."

"And far more patience than I could ever manage," Vivien chuckled, rising slowly from the bench Lela had practically shoved her onto. "Seriously, though, Lela, thank you."

"Anytime," Lela beamed. Checking her watch once again, she clapped her hands and said, "Now, I believe it's time we show you off to everyone at Big Momma's."

"What about Royce?" Vivien asked hesitantly as Lela began to leave the room. "Shouldn't we go see him first?"

Turning back to Vivien as she opened her bedroom door, Lela smirked knowingly, "His shift starts early on weekends."

"His shift?" 

But Lela was already on her way out of the room, a wink being the only response Vivien could pry from the girl as she followed Lela out of the room and down to the living room where everyone else was waiting. With everyone else decked out in their finest sixties regalia, Vivien didn't feel half as out of place as she assumed she would be as she followed them outside, where a blue Volkswagen bus waited. As Mick climbed into the driver's seat, Vivien was allowed the seat beside her, and once everyone was inside, they took off down the road. Taking in the sights of the beach town as they rolled down the street, Vivien found it impossible to wipe the smile from her face.

The look of everything in the area was so different than what she was used to back home - mid-century houses with slanted roofs and fun doorways lined one side of the street while small businesses with typically fifties and sixties fonts in their windows lined the other. Turning toward Mick, she said, "I think I'm already in love."

With a laugh, Mick's gaze flitted toward the brunette before settling on the road again as she turned into a small parking lot where a few cars and motorcycles had parked, the expansive beach and a large building with a thatched roof within walking distance of the lot. Confused, Vivien followed the others as they climbed out of the car, but as everyone headed around the building, Vivien found herself dragged by the wrist toward the back entrance. Mick held the door for her younger friend and guided her through the kitchen before depositing her by the refrigerator and telling her to stay low until she came to get her. 

Resigning to her fate of being stuck between the fridge and the trash can, Vivien crouched low to the floor, observing the people in the kitchen as they moved around, seemingly without noticing her presence. The smell of freshly cooked fish and baked potatoes filled the air, contrasting the stench of the food scraps piling up in the trash next to Vivien as she inched as close to the fridge as possible. However, as a blonde waitress entered the kitchen through the swinging door Mick had left through, Vivien found herself caught. With a hesitant smile and an awkward wave, the blonde neared the fridge with a tray and gathered colorful bottles of soda from it before placing it on a stainless steel counter and glancing over her shoulder at Vivien.

"Are you supposed to be back here?" the girl asked, a thick, southern twang accenting her voice.

Vivien swallowed thickly, offering a shrug as she explained, "My friend pushed me back here."

"Why?" the blonde questioned as she began popping off the lids of the sodas.

"I'm trying to surprise my boyfriend," Vivien explained. "I'm from New Hampshire and he doesn't know I'm here."

The blonde glanced around the kitchen, seemingly looking for someone, before settling her hazel eyes back on the girl crouched on the floor. Lowering her voice, she said, "Be grateful Big Momma isn't back here. This place is supposed to be staff-only after the soda geyser incident that happened a few weeks ago."

"Soda geyser?" Vivien repeated, mildly curious as to whether or not that had anything to do with the Mentos experiment she had shown the boys over Facetime not long ago.

"It was a huge mess," the blonde said before waving it off. Kneeling down to the brunette's height, the girl held out a hand and asked, "What's your name?"

Latching hands with the girl, Vivien smiled and said, "I'm-"

"Vivien, it's time!" Mick whisper-yelled as she pushed open the swinging door. Finding the girl on the floor and the blonde in front of her, Mick stalled, the gears in her brain turning for a moment as she processed the scene before a smile appeared on her face. "Oh, hey, Juliet."

"Hey, Mick," Juliet greeted. Turning back to the girl before her, she asked, "I presume that makes you Vivien?"

Vivien nodded, "And you Juliet?" 

"Guilty as charged," Juliet smiled, her teeth a blinding white in comparison to her peachy lip gloss. Pulling the younger girl to her feet, Juliet asked, "So, what's the plan? How're we surprising this lucky mystery boy?"

"Well, I was thinking Viv could go out and pretend to be a waitress to surprise him," Mick claimed.

Glancing through the serving window, Juliet asked, "What table are they?"

"It's Miles' little brother, Royce," Mick explained. "He should be on his lunch break with his brothers now, right?"

Juliet's wide-eyed gasp shocked Vivien as the blonde whirled around, "Wait, for real? You're with Royce?" When Vivien slowly nodded in confirmation, Juliet let out a soft chuckle, "Everyone thought he was pulling our legs when he said he had a girlfriend. Especially 'cause he said she lived in a different state."

"Well, he was telling the truth," Vivien smiled nervously. 

"I guess so," Juliet beamed. Turning to Mick, she said, "Anyway, I just got all their drinks together. If you want to head out now, I'll take Vivien here with me and say she's a new trainee."

Mick thought for a moment, but it didn't take her long to decide, "Honestly, that's a better plan than mine. I'll go back to my seat, and I'll see you out there in a few!"

As Mick hurried back through the door, Juliet turned to Vivien and asked, "So, newbie, are you ready for your first day at work?"

"I guess so," Vivien said, sucking in a deep breath. 

With a smile, Juliet took a spare waist apron from the hangers on the wall and tied it around the younger girl before picking up her tray of sodas and asking, "Think you can carry this to their booth?"

"I can certainly try," Vivien offered, eyeing the collection of colored liquids.

Once Juliet was sure Vivien had a good hold on the tray, she said, "Just stay behind me and don't say a word until I introduce you. The less chance he has of seeing you, the better chances you have of surprising him."

Vivien nodded, and without another word, Juliet began to lead the way out, holding the door open behind her for Vivien before leading her through the busy restaurant. Vivien didn't get the chance to look around much as they walked, more focused on not spilling any drinks than exploring. However, as Juliet stopped at a booth along the far wall, Vivien looked around, hoping to see some familiar faces among the crowds.

Clearing her throat, Juliet spoke, "Hope y'all don't mind, but we've got a new girl with us this noontime and I figured I'd show her the ropes while Royce here takes his break."

"That's fine, Jules," Vivien heard Miles say. "What's her name?"

"I figured I'd let her introduce herself when she's ready," Juliet said, glancing over her shoulder at Vivien before stepping aside.

Finally able to see the group in the booth, Vivien took in the look of surprise on Miles' face first. Miles quickly got Carrie's attention by squeezing her hand, getting her to look up from the menu in her hands. Cerulean eyes glittered like fireworks as Carrie saw the girl standing at the end of the table, and she hurriedly tapped Bentley's shin under the table with the toe of her shoe, making him lift his head from the crayon drawings he had begun on the back of one of the disposable, paper placemats. Somewhat annoyed at the interruption, Bentley lifted his gaze with a question on his lips, but as Carrie pointed to the end of the table, his question died, and his mouth dropped open, his eyes widening to the size of dinner plates.

Before anyone could signal Royce to lift his head from his arms as he yawned tiredly toward the table, Vivien smiled at his tangled curls and said, "Hey, handsome."

Without bothering to look up, Royce decided that, since nobody else cared to speak, he would, and mumbled, "Believe it or not, Miles has a girlfriend."

Vivien fought down a laugh and said, "Believe it or not, I wasn't talking to him."

The first to pull himself out of his shocked stupor, Miles grinned and said, "Royce has one too."

"I don't see her anywhere," Vivien said, placing the tray of drinks on the end of the table. "Maybe I need a mirror."

Royce rolled his eyes, lifting his head from his arms enough to take his soda from the tray as he said, "Not interested."

"Royce," Bentley began warningly but was quickly stopped by Miles as the oldest of the brothers placed a finger to his lips and gestured for the boy to stay silent.

"Damn," Vivien sighed as Royce's forehead rested against his arms once more. "And here I thought we would have lasted at least half a year before you decided to break up with me, Rolls."

Startled by the choice of nickname, Royce's eyes peeled open, and through the corner of his eyes, he found himself looking at a pair of Converse with faded doodles on the white of the toe, but it wasn't until he saw the tiny ship charm dangling from her laces that he began putting pieces together. As he slowly lifted his head, Royce found himself frozen with shock. Sure enough, standing before him was his girlfriend, but she looked as though she had stepped out of a magazine. Her typical jeans and T-shirt were replaced with clothing he was used to seeing on some of his friends at school, and her hair was pulled into a ponytail he knew she would normally complain about at the end of the day, but she didn't seem upset by it in the slightest. Her round glasses caught the light above their table perfectly, glinting magically as the light above another nearby table casted a golden halo around her from behind. For a while, Royce was convinced he was seeing things - Vivien couldn't be in his world; it was impossible! She would have told him she was coming! - but then she smiled down at him and said something he couldn't hear over the thoughts running rampant in his head.

Swallowing as he blinked up at her, Royce softly asked, "Vivien?"

The girl before him laughed, and while that beautiful symphony was all he needed to hear, her nod dispelled any further doubts he could have had. Rocketing up from his seat, Royce lunged forward, bringing his arms around her as far as they would reach, nearly lifting her from the floor as she giggled by his ear. They stood like that for what felt like an eternity before Royce backed away enough to take her face in his hands, examining her as though it was the first time.

"Hey," she breathed, as eloquent as ever.

"You-" Royce cut himself off with a laugh, "You're real. You're real and you're here. How are you here?"

Vivien shrugged, "Magic."

Scoffing a laugh, Royce shook his head and brought her back into an embrace that she quickly returned. Looking over her boyfriend's shoulder at the group, who had now pulled themselves out of the booth to greet her, Vivien smiled and gestured for Bentley to join them. Needing no further encouragement, Bentley was quick to attach himself to the pair, ducking under Royce's arm as it came around his shoulders and smiling as Vivien's snuck around his back. The trio refused to separate until Miles asked for his hug, making Vivien pry herself away from her boys for long enough to give Miles and Carrie a greeting as well. Then, just like magnets, the trio fell back together again. This time, however, they separated after a minute, and with Vivien's hands locked firmly in theirs, the boys began showing her around to anyone and everyone who would give them the time of day.

Vivien couldn't help but smile as she was dragged through the restaurant, her face burning like a neon firetruck. As much as she hated being the center of attention, she tried to swallow back her growing anxiety at being surrounded by strangers in favor of allowing the boys to introduce her to the people they cared about. She was sure her growing nerves and embarrassment at being shown off like a prize horse would wear off over time once the boys began to settle, and she wasn't about to complain to either of them until they were calmed down a bit. After all, they had waited long enough for this. Besides, what was the harm of a little embarrassment? If it meant the boys' gleaming smiles never left their faces, she would deal with it a thousand times over. Catching Royce watching her fondly as Bentley introduced her to some of their and their brother's friends, Vivien smiled. 

Maybe - just maybe - she could get used to this.

#Same Trailer Different Park #STDP #and so it begins

[wutheringmights]

After feeling like an absolute clown when I saw The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes movie in theaters, I figured it was time I sat down and read the original novel for myself. Unsurprisingly, I really enjoyed the book. It's definitely my favorite Hunger Games novel.

I should leave a disclaimer real quick. So I read the original trilogy a few years before the movies were released. I liked them well enough, but I always struggled to love them. Unfortunately, my biggest problem is Katniss. She's a great character. I do not like being stuck in her POV. I wish this was an ensemble story so that every side of the conflict is explored. In that way, the movies almost work better for me. I say almost, as I have such a bone to pick with Catching Fire throwing Katniss back into the arena, but that's another rant for another time.

My point is that I have never been passionate about the series, and I have not read the books in many, many years.

Yet, I still feel fairly confident calling this the best book in the series. I like exploring stories from the wrong perspective. Seeing the games from the eyes of the Capitol is genuinely interesting. I love the chapters where the students debate the philosophy of the games. I love watching Coriolanus justify his own decisions. I am obsessed with how this man thinks.

I cannot give enough praise for how Collins write Coriolanus's point of view. Here, the limited perspective works flawlessly. Seeing the world filtered through his eyes is interesting-- though I wonder why she chose to write this novel in limited third person? Did she want the veneer of objectivity that comes with third person POV, or is the first person POV trend in YA over?

I am not saying this book is perfect. It's goofy in one too many places, and there are a few plot points that just feel very immature to me (mainly, Coriolanus having to save Sejanus from the arena-- only a YA novel would make that justifiable).

My biggest problem is the loss of tension after the second act. As important as it is for the story to take Lucy Gray and Coriolanus out of the Capitol and the games, that third act really drags. There needed to be one more plotline carried over from the first two acts to help keep the suspension building. Collins really could have shaved 100 pages off this book, or made that third act into a second novel entirely.

With that in mind, I think I still like the movie better, if only for all the ways it condenses the story and fixes some of the pacing.

What really upsets me is how many people on Good Reads hate this book. I saw one review decrying the concept of this novel as ill-conceived-- something about trying to humanize the Hunger Games' Palpatine. That takes me back to how hung-up I am at the concept of a Hunger Games fandom. These books are so committed to their message and themes that it's always weird to see people talk about ships and stuff. I guess I just don't see the appeal.

When I was in high school, English teachers were just allowing the first book to be read and analyzed for class. According to a teacher friend of mine, the book is now an official part of the curriculum. I think that's a little unwarranted too. But if kids studied The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes in school... yeah, I would be okay with that one.

#i tried to stay on topic about the actual book i read but this turned into a rant about my complicated feelings about thg #i want to love the hunger games but man... they're just good and really nothing more #me rambling #me reading #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #the hunger games

[anosrepasi]

Book Review: The Museum of Human History by Rebekah Bergman

The Museum of Human History is Bergman's debut novel, having been released only a month ago as of Sept 2023 and is a relatively quick read at 241 pages. Summarized in a few words: it's strikingly similar to being unintentionally hit on the mouth, no harm intended but the impact is there nonetheless. I'd give it 4.5/5.

in a few more words:

This is a novel where you don't love the characters, but you'll still cry for them. There's no purely favored characters here and they are all ugly in their own ways, but its the flaws of the characters and the personal tragedies they experience that really drive deep the impact of their story. This is a book about grief. It's a book about remembering and knowing your loss, rather than forgetting the loss.

At it's core, its a very simple book. The cast of characters extends to roughly 15-20 at most, they cycle in and out of book from start to finish. The breadth of individuals scenes and moments in the book is also strikingly limited. Bergman builds up her story through palimpsest, revisiting the scenes from earlier chapters in later chapters from another characters view point. She builds up the emotion of the story through the precise use of poetic prose, packing more punch with some of her two sentence lines than many of her paragraphs.

This is not a book you will "like" or feel good about having finished, it ends leaving many characters feeling unresolved, but much like the central theme of grief- that's kind of the point and should not be seen as a flaw to the narrative.

For a debut novel it's impressive, clunky, definitely clunky in some spots that don't hold the same attention as other chapters, but over all it's a great example of writing a harrowing story that can cause tears with a very very simple toolbox of scenes and characters.

It is also, in my opinion, one of those novels that demands a reread at a later point in time once you've seen the complete story. Spoilers following, but there's two specific narrative threads that make a reread make the cohesive story all the more impactful.

The first is that Bergman has enough clues for the reader to know exactly what the algae is and what it'll do from chapter 4. The clues are all their and in my first reading I completely glossed over them all until later in the book when Bergman starts making the connections far more explicit. But when you do connect them, it completely changes the scope of the book. Naomi spends one paragraph wondering about "how much destruction she helped bring in, unwittingly," and at the time of that sentence it's played out as being overblown, an overzealous statement of an environmentally minded person before she realizes the truth. Then you read the whole novel and realize that she actually did exactly what she feared- but if she lived to see it might not have cared? Because the impacts were mostly human centered rather than the literal destruction of the environment she cared about. Which is awful, but is a pretty consistent theme in the entire novel. The characters care and they love, but that love constantly seems to be overshadowed by their apathy or their pain, and how in being unable to accept what they love with pain they lose it completely instead.

The second narrative thread of interest is Evangeline and Mauve and their shift from mirror images/defined set of twins to being considered an individual and the individual's ghost. Especially considering that the title of ghost seems to get passed back and forth between the characters. I got caught in this thread with one of the side character's Dr.Dean mentioning running into Naomi on the beach and "She was with her daughter." Both girls were present in that scene, but in memory they've already been reduced to one. I'm sure there's multiple occasions where this happens in the book and I find the tension between one very living child who is a shadow to her comatose static sister and vise versa over and over to be incredibly captivating.

Overall, if you enjoy poetic prose, lots of grief, and a healthy dash of environmental and medical science fiction? Chances are you'll enjoy this book, even if enjoy feels like the wrong word here.

#book review #The Museum of Human History #Rebekah Bergman #science fiction #book recommendations #ano reads #ano reviews #environmental science fiction #medical science fiction #grief #memory

[jo3ydr3w]

Joey Drew BITE Paper

Uploading this here because AO3 won’t stop freezing enough to let me put out the new update. Reminder, I’ve only read The Illusion of Living and the Joey Drew Studios Employee Handbook.

With Bendy and the Dark Revival’s release, we have again acquired new audio logs from the employees of Joey Drew Studios and the Gent Corporation (BATDR audio logs. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). I was very excited when the first audio log from the game I heard by Grant Cohen mentioned money randomly appearing and disappearing (YouTube. (2022, November 18).). Unfortunately, this wouldn’t have been enough to update my BITE paper, so there must be more additions, right? Right!

Joey Drew is manipulative and seems determined to control those around him. Many of his behaviors are alarming and should raise red flags for the people around him. He is displaying a lot of the behavior we see in cult leaders (Advisors, 2022). We can prove this If we turn to the “BITE” model. “BITE” stands for Behavior, Information, Thought, and Emotional control (Advisors, 2022). The BITE model is set up with four categories. There are 50 main points, and he hits 46 of them. Many main points have several sub-points. Joey Drew hits on Behavior 22 out of 25, Information all 6, Thought all 11, and Emotional 7 out of 8.

1. Regulate individual’s physical reality - This is the whole point of the game. Their physical world and how they perceive it has changed. It’s become precisely what Joey wants it to be (Ink machine. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).).

2. Dictate where, how, and with whom the member lives and associates or isolates - When Joey installs the pipes for the ink machine, they leak. This causes Sammy and others to become trapped in the music department multiple times. Quote from Sammy’s audio log about the pump switch and the ink flooding the place,

“three times last month, we couldn't even get out of our department because the ink had flooded the stairwell” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

Joey installs a pump to deal with it but controls when it is drained and who leaves. The pump switch is in Sammy's office, but he doesn’t seem to control it as people are “in and out” dealing with it (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). What’s interesting about the pump switch being in Sammy’s office is that in The Illusion of Living, Joey says this on page 227,

“I never visit Music, as Sammy and I agreed that I would only come by if we had scheduled a visit. Some creative people are just that stubborn and need their privacy” (Kress, A. (2021).).

This is interesting because that implies that Joey was never draining the pump switch itself and that possibly Gent employees were. Maybe this is why Sammy was so angry with the switch being installed in his office because Joey was breaking an agreement he had made personally with Sammy.

Hank Scott’s audio log in Bendy and the Dark Revival explains the origins of a new area in the game, Artist’s Rest. Joey built the area to give the employees a place to sleep/live in the studio. According to Hank, “you practically have only a few hours before you have to wake up and come back,” and, according to Joey, “now we never have to leave work again” (YouTube. (2022, November 18).). That entire area was built to KEEP employees in the studio and isolate them from the rest of the world.

Joey also doesn’t want employees to leave the building for medical issues as well, page 34 of the employee handbook, 

“there’s no need to recuperate at home–come visit the infirmary” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

This is again stated on page 186,

“employees who feel sick need not stay home; simply stop by the infirmary on your way to your desk. There you’ll find a menagerie of treatments and medicines to help you feel better and back to work in no time–no pesky recovery time required” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

It also seems that Joey didn’t want the excuse of needing food to keep employees from the studio, page 41 of the employee handbook,

“by now, we’re sure you’re wondering, What’s with all the soup? As part of Bendy’s licensing agreement with Briar Label Bacon Soup, the Briar Label Company has stacked Joey Drew Studios from roof to sub-sub-sub-sub-basement with free soup as a thank-you. Made from a traditional family recipe, Briar Label Bacon Soup tastes just like the home-kitchen cooking that Mom used to make. Rather than going out for lunch, please indulge in a free meal on us while you work at your desk–forks are available upon request. After eating, please leave your dirty bowls in the dedicated shelving in the stairwell for Wally Franks” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

He also controlled who employees could talk to, page 193 of the employee handbook, “Employees of Joey Drew Studios will soon get to reap all the wonderful benefits of Bendyland. In addition to a free lifetime pass* (well, as long as you stay employed here, but that’ll be a lifetime!), you also get up to four guest passes, should you somehow mingle with people who aren’t your direct coworkers” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

4. Control types of clothing and hairstyles - Quote from page 183 of the employee handbook,

“we observe a casual dress policy at the studio to foster an atmosphere conducive to creativity, but please keep in mind that business attire may be required for high-level meetings. We ask that you convene with your supervisor if you are unsure of the dress code for a particular event” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

I find this interesting, as it’s just assumed that the employees knew what the dress code was without asking. Joey also doesn’t give any examples here, so it really feels like he was just expecting them to know the second they were hired.

5. Regulate diet – food and drink, hunger and/or fasting - Joey appears to be aware of Sammy drinking ink, which is clearly an unhealthy habit. Other employees, specifically Buddy, are also aware, but no one says anything or tries to help him (Sammy Lawrence. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).).

6. Manipulation and deprivation of sleep - The motto for the animation studio is “Work hard work happy”

(" Travaille Dur, Travaille heureux ": Bendy y la máquina de tinta, Bendy y Boris, imagenes de videojuegos. Pinterest. (2017, October 8).). Sammy complains about being overworked and Joey leaving things to the last minute. He says his work is causing nightmares and unusual sleep (YouTube. (2019).). Bill Danton’s audio log Dancing Clock has Bill state he has “thousands of frames to go.” He seems out of breath and starts out of control laughing towards the end (YouTube. (2022, November 18).). The mental well-being of employees wasn’t a priority to Joey. Even when Joey wasn’t directly interfering with work and stopping them from working when they needed sleep, other employees seemed to be disrupting work. Phil seems excited that Joey hasn’t been bothering him as he’s able to get work done, but a “freak” a few desks over is starting to drive him crazy by constantly asking to look at “pictures he’s been drawing” (YouTube. (2022, November 18).).

7. Financial exploitation, manipulation or dependence - Joey demands Grant lie on IRS report sheets (Staff, S. I. (2019).). If Grant is caught, this will reflect on him; he’d have to prove this was Joey’s idea and that he was being forced. Quote from page 83 of the employee handbook,

“from: Grant Cohen

To: Joey Drew

Mister Drew, I really do need to speak with you as soon as possible. Like I said in my last note, we’re running $48,128 short this quarter. We won’t be able to cover our taxes; I’m fielding daily calls from the IRS looking for our payments. There’s not enough in the accounts right now to cover everything, even if I move some funds around and fudge the numbers. I’ve also received several sizable bills from Gent, which I’ll need to account for, besides the Bendyland payments, which we won’t be able to make again this month. Can you please have your girl call down to me when you’re next available” (Staff, S. I. (2019).). Grant’s newest audio log, Strange Money, reveals that money was mysteriously showing up on the finance records. Money that was untraceable and impossible to hunt down (YouTube. (2022, November 18).). Grant wasn’t aware of what a lot of the money was used on, despite what Joey tries to claim, quote from pages 80-81 of the employee handbook,

“accounting has final approval over department budgets, salaries, new hires, etc. Should you encounter any issues with your paycheck, your claim will likely go through Accounting with the help of Administration. [...]

From Grant Cohen, Accounting & Finance

RE: Employee Backpay

Valued Employee, You are receiving this letter to notify you that you are owed BACKPAY IN THE AMOUNT OF $60.76. As our company awaits an influx of revenue from recent investments, we are unable to pay you. Rest assured that we are monitoring the situation closely and will offer you relief as soon as funds become available. We do not anticipate this period to last more than several weeks. Please feel free to visit Accounting & Finance on Level S with any further questions. [...]

Special Projects………………………..$64,921. 98 [...]

Mister Drew, we can’t afford these high figures on special projects any longer. Please limit your spending or find additional investors–we’re on the verge of being in the red again this year” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

We know that Grant and Joey were the only people that were aware of the tax evasion and fraud, as page 226 from The Illusion of Living states,

“10:00 am.: Meet with Accounting. This is usually very short, just a moment for Mr. Cohen to let me know if there is anything in particular we need to pay attention to, but as you can imagine the financial security of Joey Drew Studios is so sound that really it’s just another excuse for a coffee and a chat” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Then on the bottom of the page where Nathan Arch Sr. has left his thoughts as notes,

“it’s a sad fact that even in 1942 the studio was struggling financially, and it’s hard to know if Joey was aware of this at the time of writing the book. On the one hand, I like to think he was, considering he was always so proud of how intimately he knew his studio. But on the other hand, I sometimes prefer thinking he had no idea, that others were lying to him instead of him lying to himself” (Kress, A. (2021).).

This quote from Nathan is fascinating as it contradicts an audio log by Joey found in the game Boris and the Dark Survival, a quote from the audio log, 

“it's been quite a struggle to put this into words, Nathan. After so many years, you know I'd never ask unless it was dire, but when a man's in a spot, he should call upon his friends! Truth is...Well, the studio is comin' up a little short” (YouTube. (2021, October 13).). Nathan knew that Joey was well aware that the studio was in debt and needed help financially.

Nathan, however, is somewhat correct in the fact that employees were hiding things from Joey, quote from the employee handbook, page 204,

“Bendy is our most beloved character here at Joey Drew Studios. As such, he has a strict model that all of our animators are asked to follow” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Joey here isn’t aware of the fact that the animators are sharing one single reference sheet that has all of Bendy’s emotions on it and has them labeled for what emotion he should be showing at the scene

(Amino. (2020, April 28).). They also have on the sheet not to show Joey that they were using just one expression. It seems like they were scared of him finding out.

Grant seems not to be able to handle either the pressure of knowing about the fraud and random money or has developed paranoia from it as Sally Newt, a secretary at the studio, wrote a note that mentioned Grant “just walks from his desk down to the men’s room and back all day. Over and over again, gripping his stomach. Kind of green in the gills. I can’t tell if something he ate isn’t agreeing with him, or if he just can’t take the pressure anymore” (Getting serious. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). I was pushed to the paranoia option once I heard the Hiding Treasures audio log recorded by Kay Lee, as she says, “Mr. Cohen brought me in to catalog and secure some of Joey Drew’s more special assets in places no one will ever find them. Sure, that sounds completely legal” (YouTube. (2022, November 18).). I also noticed that in The Illusion of Living, Joey says this about Grant’s work schedule, page 205,

“somewhere I imagined the film team might be working, or even possibly Cohen on the accounts (he liked to arrive at the studio late and stay late, and as long as a man gets the job done, what do I care if his schedule is a bit unusual?)” (Kress, A. (2021).). I think it’s very concerning that Grant was known to be running back and forth from the bathrooms, acting paranoid, begging Joey to get the paychecks on time, and showing up late (Grant Cohen. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). It seems to me that Grant was dealing with some form of depression because of the studio.

It also seems that Grant, or perhaps another employee that was aware of the financial status of the company spoke out about the possibility of the studio closing soon 

(The archive. Joey Drew Studios. (n.d.).).

I’m of the belief that it was most likely Grant that did the interview for the article. As the article states, 

“according to recent reports coming from the studio, it seems that trouble is spreading like spilled ink. One employee who asked to remain anonymous told The Telegram that he doubts the company will be able to sustain much longer. Some of the reasons given for the financial difficulties are rocketing expenses related to what he referred to as ‘Joey’s folly’. When asked for clarification he confusingly told us he ‘feared the machine’ and didn’t want to comment further” (The archive. Joey Drew Studios. (n.d.).). The reason I think this was Grant is that he’s the only person that would be aware of how deep in debt the studio was and how much the ink machine was costing the studio. Quote from one of his audio logs, 

“speaking of which, and this is top secret, apparently Mr. Drew has another large project in mind now... and it ain't gonna be cheap” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).His death was recorded on an audio log, something we haven’t seen, to my knowledge, with any other studio employee (Indiscernible. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). Maybe Joey found out and killed Grant for it.This isn’t even the first time employee’s have spoken out about the finances of the studio, a year prior, in 1946, an article by the World Herald was published about this, pages 120-121 of the employee handbook,

“Joey Drew Studios Under Investigation Financial Trouble Looming For Animation Company

New York, NY–Joey Drew Studios is under investigation, with former employees citing hazardous work environments, harassment, and excessive backpay. The company is also in danger of going bankrupt, according to investors. “These accusations are preposterous–they’re ridiculous,” said Joey Drew, founder and president of the company. “I vehemently deny them. These are sad lies no doubt made by disgruntled former employees or competing studios. Our facility is state-of-the-art. Joey Drew Studios is where dreams happen. And it’s where dreams are going to happen. We have no financial troubles at all.”Anonymous workers at Joey Drew Studios have threatened to unionize over the poor conditions, which include unpermitted building, hazardous electrical wiring, and a plumbing system prone to bursting, Many employees also cite excessive work hours, most of which were unpaid. Several animators’ confided that they hadn’t seen their families in weeks, after being threatened with disciplinary action and termination if they were unable to finish animations on exceedingly tight schedules. Music director Sammy Lawrence seemed unfazed by the claims. “Joey runs a pretty tight ship. Some people can’t take it, and that’s fine. This industry is all about survival of the fittest. We don’t need a bunch of useless sheep who can’t finish their work on time.”Despite the mounting evidence against the company, Mister Drew remains adamant that the studio has done nothing wrong. “I am so certain that there’s nothing wrong with our studio, I not only welcome investigators–I invite them,” said Drew. “Reports of barricaded offices, employees locked in work spaces, and malfunctioning machinery are just crazy. And about the money, why, we just installed new technology in partnership with the Gent Corporation! We certainly wouldn’t have done that if we were going bankrupt! In fact, we’re on the verge of taking our business to the next level. I can’t wait to show everyone what we have in store with our new cartoons.”

City officials have reported that they will be exploring these complaints against the company in the coming weeks, to determine if the claims have any merit. In the meantime, employees seem to be fleeing the studio in droves. Recent job listings have included a head of animation, several background and character artists. If his staffing issues are as bad as they seem, one must wonder if Mister Drew intends to draw future cartoons himself” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

He also says this on page 193 of the employee handbook,

“Employees of Joey Drew Studios will soon get to reap all the wonderful benefits of Bendyland. In addition to a free lifetime pass*. [...] You’ll also get a 40 percent discount to use on your purchases.** [...]

*The Bendyland Employee Pass is not valid on New Year’s Day, Groundhog Day, Mardi Gras, Ash Wednesday, Valentine’s Day, Chinese New Year, Purim, Holi, St. Patrick’s Day, Good Friday, Easter Sunday, Easter Monday, Passover, Tax Day, Cinco de Mayo, Mother’s Day, Ramadan, Memorial Day, Flag Day, Father’s Day, Eid al-Fitr, Independence Day, Labor Day, Rosh Hashanah, Yom Kippur, Sukkot, Columbus Day, Navarati, Halloween, All Saints’ Day, Veterans Day, The Day Before Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving Weekend, or all the month of December. Also not valid during work hours or blackout dates,

**Employee discount is limited to a one-time use only. Discount voucher not valid on toys, food, apparel, bedding, churros that aren’t being used as food but are being used as–well, ask Mr. Franks–books, stationery, cold weather gear, hot weather gear, drinks, jewelry, Bacon Soup, or keychains” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Most of the days I can agree with for the pass not being valid on, but I can’t understand Groundhog Day and Valentine’s Day not being valid days. I also don’t understand what the employees were supposed to use the 40 percent discount on if the above-listed items don’t apply to it. The only thing I can think of that you would be able to use it on would be your entry ticket.

8. Restrict leisure, entertainment, vacation time - He is their boss, so he controls this. He tends to take it too far and overwork them. Some employees report staying in the studio for days (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Quote from page 187 of the employee handbook,

 “for this reason, employees are only eligible for five days of paid leave a year. Absences above that number–due to illness or otherwise–will likely result in immediate termination” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

At first, I was shocked when I read the five days figure, but then I remembered this what the 1930/40s, so I thought it might have been normal at the time. I decided to look into it and was shocked. It was not normal at the time.

Even back in 1940, you were given 7-14 days off on average, quote from a labor review from 1940,

“the majority of these workers receive a maximum of 1 week’s vacation with pay after 1 year’s service within the company. [...] provide a 2-week maximum for all or a part of a working force” (Vacations with pay in union agreements, - JSTOR. (n.d.).).

The craziest part of the Joey Drew Studios’ employee leave, is that they actually do NOT get paid leave. Joey states this on page 188 of the employee handbook,

“in some animation studios we will not name, employees are given paid vacation time, and while that all sounds fine and dandy, we must ask: Why, in Bendy’s good name, would anyone need to take a vacation from their job unless they hated it?” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

I didn’t even add the italics for emphasis on that quote. They’re actually in the book. Joey hated the idea of spending money for employees to take paid vacations that he just had to show his disgust for it in a book for new hires.

In fact, you don’t actually get access to vacation time until you’ve worked at the company for multiple years, page 189 of the employee handbook,

“once your company loyalty is proven with five years of continuous service, Joey Drew Studios is thrilled to offer five days of unpaid vacation time, with which we hope you’ll take your family on a wholesome, well-earned trip to our Bendyland amusement park when it’s complete” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

This is also only available once you’ve “built up this trust with the company” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

10. Permission required for major decisions - Employees were told there were no financial struggles with the studio when there were. They were told not to question the leader and just do whatever they did (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

11. Rewards and punishments used to modify behaviors, both positive and negative - Joey took Susie to lunch, paid for it, and called her by her preferred name (the character she voices). She’s intoxicated with him and loves being called Alice. It makes her believe she is Alice (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Joey has a reward system mentioned on page 190 of the employee handbook,

“employee of the month

This is a new initiative that we’ll be starting soon: Employee of the Month. How it works is simple. Joey Drew was the first employee, so he’ll be the first employee of the month. If anyone is better than him, they get to be employee of the month. So far no one’s usurped Joey…but maybe that will change with you” (Staff, S. I. (2019).). I’d also like to point out that Joey is using the system to make employees act differently.

12. Discourage individualism, encourage group-think - Employees were told there were no financial difficulties with the studio when there were. They were told not to question the leader and just do whatever it was they did (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). The motto for the studio is “work hard work happy” (" Travaille Dur, Travaille heureux ": Bendy y la máquina de tinta, Bendy y Boris, imagenes de videojuegos. Pinterest. (2017, October 8).) This encourages long hours, as we see with Sammy (YouTube. (2019).). This can make employees feel like a family. Joey even refers to the characters and employees as family quote from page 129 of the employee handbook,

“as the creator of Bendy, Boris the Wolf, and Alice Angel, Mister Drew views these characters and his employees as his family, and he always makes time for family” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Then he also calls Thomas family in the description of what his job is, page 179,

“while Thomas isn’t strictly an employee of the studio, he is like family to us” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

He even refers to the administration department as home, quote from page 181 of the employee handbook,

“this sprawling layout is designed to house the nearly seventy employees who call Administration home” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Then has new hires call the other employees family, page 185 of the employee handbook,

“take a minute to say hello to your new teammates as they welcome you to the Joey Drew family” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

This concept of the studio being “family” is once again repeated in the book, page 190, 

“holiday bonuses

The holidays are time for family…and when you’re here, you’re part of Joey’s family. To thank you for all your hard work, we are pleased to reward our employees the opportunity to earn overtime by working Christmas, so you can celebrate our work with the ones you love most–Bendy, Boris the Wolf, and Alice Angel” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

13. Impose rigid rules and regulations - He expected people to do as they were told, don’t question, work long hours, and complete questionable behavior  (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).  According to the employee handbook, you only get one bathroom break a day, page 170,

“restroom: To your left you will find the restrooms. This is important to note, as you’ll be spending a lot of time in the Animation Department and will need to use the toilet probably no more than once a day” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

14. Punish disobedience by beating, torture, burning, cutting, rape, or tattooing/branding - Page 120 of the employee handbook,

“Several animators’ confided that they hadn’t seen their families in weeks, after being threatened with disciplinary action and termination if they were unable to finish animations on exceedingly tight schedules” (Staff, S. I. (2019).). Joey threatened the safety of employees if they didn’t get work done.

15. Threaten harm to family and friends -  Page 120 of the employee handbook,

“several animators’ confided that they hadn’t seen their families in weeks after being threatened with disciplinary action and termination” after being threatened with disciplinary action and termination” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

16. Force individual to rape or be raped - There is no proof of this.

17. Encourage and engage in corporal punishment - Page 120 of the employee handbook,

“music director Sammy Lawrence seemed unfazed by the claims. “Joey runs a pretty tight ship. Some people can’t take it, and that’s fine. This industry is all about survival of the fittest. We don’t need a bunch of useless sheep who can’t finish their work on time” (Staff, S. I. (2019).). It seems to me that Joey was teaching Sammy or manipulating him into hurting other employees.

18. Instill dependency and obedience - Joey tells them not to question him (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Bertrum says that Joey might pay him but does not own him. It almost feels like the subject has come up, as he is very aggressive about it (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Employees mention money a lot (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

A quote from the “Bendy Goes Bankrupt” article,

“another man, who also wished to remain nameless, gave a public rebuttal of Mr. Drew’s ‘just a pencil and a dream’ philosophy: “Mr. Drew, the pencil can be erased; mistakes removed and revisions made to suit the changing landscape of your world. But ink. Ink stains forever. Ink creates truths that cannot be erased or altered. Ink is permanent…just like the effect you’ve had on everyone around you and your studio. Mr. Drew, your world is NOT a world of graphite, but of INK” (The archive. Joey Drew Studios. (n.d.).).

Even though this employee spoke out about Joey, they stayed, despite knowing it was the worst thing to do. Joey was able to instill such dependency in his employees that they would constantly speak out about him but never left.

There’s also a section in The Illusion of Living where Joey praises Henry for being obedient to the reader, page 175,

“we looked at each other and it was in that moment I knew that Henry had a part to play. That he was in. He was all in. A shared vision. It was, after all, what I’d been looking for in a teammate.

“You want a job?” I asked.

“I want to be your partner.”

“Partner.”

“Yeah. At Joey Drew Studios.”

That suggestion gave me pause. You have to understand that when you’ve lived with an idea that has belonged to just you for so long, it’s hard to imagine sharing it. But this evening had shown me how valuable others could be. How an idea of mine could be realized through the efforts of others. Henry’s keenness, the work he’d put in even before I’d opened the door to him. His own cartoons on that factory wall. His animation skills. Didn’t hurt that he didn’t want to change the name of the studio even as a partner. That showed respect” (Kress, A. (2021).). Henry created the Bendy character, yet Joey felt he didn’t even deserve to have his name in the company title. Then praises him for being so obedient and not wanting to change Joey’s mind about the name. Even if you agree with Joey that the studio name shouldn’t have been changed, I’m sure you can admit that his praising Henry to the reader is very bizarre and controlling.

He seems to be able to instill obedience in anyone, even if it’s just minor obedience, page 54 of The Illusion of Living,

“I have always considered myself a humble man, in fact many have praised this quality in me. It’s true that despite my success and fame, I remain constant to my values as a person” (Kress, A. (2021).).

This also happens with Abby, page 68, “she nodded this time. I liked when she agreed” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey seems determined to have control over everyone for whatever reason he wants at the time, quote from page 92,

“even though I knew the piece was a lovely little work of remarkable talent, I have to admit that the outside validation definitely solidified this next step on the path to my greatness. I knew now I was not only a natural storyteller but understood perfectly in the moment what to do to entertain an audience, how to make them react exactly as I wanted them to. I had complete control and it was clear, I had to tell stories then, there was no question. That was the way I was going to share my Illusion of Living with the world” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Even Lottie seems to be completely obedient to him even while she’s an ocean away, quote from page 37 of The Illusion of Living, 

“I knew my letters were of great comfort because she told me often and praised my ability to turn a phrase” (Kress, A. (2021).).

19. Kidnapping - There is no proof of this.

20. Beating  There is no proof of this one.

21. Torture - Joey puts people through the ink machine. He even records himself killing Grant (Indiscernible. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).).

22. Rape - There is no proof, but I think it still needs to be discussed. Susie seems infatuated with Joey. Due to their employee arrangement, Joey shouldn’t be sleeping with her. They aren’t just working together; he is her boss in a small company. This would be taking advantage of her. While there is no proof they were together at any time, I can see him doing this to keep control.

23. Separation of Families - Henry was separated from his romantic partner (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

24. Imprisonment - Many people are locked inside that studio and can never get out (Joey Drew Studios. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).).

25. Murder -  Joey murdered many people. He recorded himself killing Grant (Indiscernible. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). He even brings Sammy into it by corrupting him (Sammy Lawrence. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).).

1. Deception:

 a. Deliberately withhold information -  Tells the people not to worry and trust the leader. He talks about destiny and the bigger picture (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

b. Distort information to make it more acceptable - He tells people they can do anything if they dream. The tape keeps running, and he doesn’t realize it’s still on. He calls what he is saying “trash” and “slop,” and he says people “eat it up” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

c. Systematically lie to the cult member - He lies when he is distorting the information. He’s looking for the best way to put the information, so people will eat it up (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

Quote from page 70 of The Illusion of Living,

“Heck even in those rare occasions when people would say that Henry created Bendy, Boris, or Alice because they had met him once and he’d spoken about the creation process with them, I was happy to let people think it. A man who is secure with himself doesn’t need to set things right. He just lives his life knowing the truth.

That being said, I did invent all the cartoon characters at the studio. That goes without saying. They are mine, my inspiration, based on my life experiences. Anyone who says anything differently is lying or has been lied to” (Kress, A. (2021).).

There are a lot of lies in these two paragraphs, but I want to get the funny part out of the way first. Joey states that secure people don’t have to prove themselves, then tries to prove himself. It almost seems like Joey isn’t confident in himself. I want to tackle the elephant in the room next. Who created the three characters Joet lists here, Bendy, Boris, and Alice?

Let’s start with Bendy.

Something I find interesting is that Joey cuts Abby out of Bendy’s origin story. It’s not just Joey who does this. I’ve seen people who’ve read The Illusion of Living purposely cut Abby and, in widespread cases, cut Henry out as well. It seems even real people have managed to fall for Joey’s lies, deception, and manipulation.

Quote from page 166,

“so…” she said, slowly finding the idea intriguing, I could tell, “like a small boy playing pranks” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Abby came up with the idea of Bendy, before he was even Bendy, before the night with Henry, that he should play pranks. Playing pranks on people is a staple of Bendy’s character in the shorts. One could even argue that it’s his “main job” in the shorts.

Henry came up with the design for Bendy, pages 171-173,

“no, what I saw in front of me was a cartoon character that had the slightest beginnings of Bendy. He still looked like a real boy but now was a proper cartoon. His clothes had been made minimalist. His face was rounder, his nose didn’t exist anymore, and he had those typical black cartoon eyes that were especially popular back then. [...] Henry sat still for a moment, the pencil hovering over the paper. He was deep in thought, or so I hoped. “Ah!” he suddenly said to himself and started sketching again.

This was the first glimpse I had of something like Bendy. It wasn’t Bendy, not yet, but the body was almost there. The shape was right, but he was wearing a shirt and shorts, as well as a pair of boots. [...] The shape of the body had taken form, it was starting to look right. His face was all wrong though, still very goatlike and with a small beard. He still needed to look young, that little devilish boy that hadn’t worked still had to be there somewhere. He wasn’t a boy though, and he wasn’t a goat. He was something fantastical, a little devil.

“His face doesn’t need to look real,” I said then.

“More like a shape maybe?” asked Henry. I didn’t understand what he meant, everything obviously was made up of shapes.

“What do you mean?”

Henry started to sketch as he spoke, I had inspired him somehow. Seeing his pencil fly so fast was truly exhilarating. He explained: “It needs to be a circle, but with horns. They should be black like his body, but his face should be white so we can see his expressions. Those classic cartoon eyes. No nose. A big toothy grin”” (Kress, A. (2021).).

The creator of Boris is a bit more speculative, but I believe it was Henry, as this audio log states,

“I’ve got a new character I think people are going to love” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).Then the short Sheep Songs is produced, and Boris is introduced in it, in 1929, during the year that Henry was working there (Staff, S. I. (2019).). That heavily implies that Henry created Boris, to me, at least. The only character he mentions he created on his own would be Alice, as she was introduced in either 1932 or 1933. I say either year because there’s a discrepancy in what year Alice was introduced. Susie recorded an audio log on August 2nd, 1932, where she states, “Sammy, our…our music director…was also telling me they’re working on a new character upstairs. Might require a female touch” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

Then, two months later records another one stating, 

“It may only be my second month working for Joey Drew, but I can already tell I'm going to love it here! People really seem to enjoy my Alice Angel voice” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). This would mean that by October of 1932, Susie was already voicing Alice. This doesn’t make sense, though, as Sent From Above, the short Alice debuted in, was released on September 12th, 1933. 

Quote from pages 54-55 of the employee handbook, 

“The Erie Daily Times

12 September 1933

Joey Drew Studios Debuts Alice Angel

New York, NY–Joining the ranks of beloved cartoon characters Bendy and Boris the Wolf is Alice Angel, the newest character at Joey Drew Studios. [...] She will be voiced by actress Susie Campbell” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

The soon-to-be-released novel, Sent From Above, appears from its cover and description to be about Alice Angel and is going to be set in

“the summer of 1932 in New York City, and word on the street is that Joey Drew Studios is planning something BIG: A new cartoon character to star alongside the world-famous Bendy!

The new addition, Alice Angel, has the halo and sweet disposition to match her name” (Sent from above (novel). Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). While the date is confusing, Alice appears to be one of Joey’s creations.

Sammy had a bit to do with Alice being created, a quote from page 193 of The Illusion of Living,

“”you need a girl,” said Sammy.

“We have plans,” I replied. We did; we didn’t know exactly what we were going to do at that point, or what she would look like, but we had plans” (Kress, A. (2021).).

It seems to me that maybe Joey made plans to create Alice go faster because of Sammy or that he was at the very least involved with the creative process, as Susie states in an audio log,

“Sammy, our…our music director…was also telling me they’re working on a new character upstairs” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

In a different section of the book, Joey thinks this when talking to the detective Adam Sinclair, page 109,

“so I lied. I’m not one who enjoys lying, I’ve always been an honest, direct kind of fellow. I believe a man should stand by his word. But I also know that sometimes the ends do justify the means. And that sometimes a lie isn’t so bad if it’s for a good reason” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He also lies to the reader of the employee handbook, an in-universe book meant for new hires at the studio, page 30,

“if you belong to a department that has access to a closet, you can ask your manager for keys to it; otherwise most closets usually remain locked to deter thieves or inefficiency” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

This is a lie as we know that Joey wasn’t letting employees into the closets based on Wally’s audio log from Boris and the Dark Survival, 

“so here's where the weird starts. I was moppin' up some of Mr. Connor's spilled ink in that little room he calls a laboratory. He can call it a laboratory all he wants, but it used to be the employee coat closet. Anyway, there I was moppin'. But that puddle, I'm tellin' ya, it kept movin' this way and that way like it had the smarts or somethin'”  (YouTube. (2021, October 13).).

It’s not even just big things he’s lying about. He’ll lie about the smallest things. Quote from page 191 of the employee handbook, “we celebrate Bendy’s birthday (the day Bendy was created–there’s devil’s food cake!), Alice Angel’s birthday (angel food cake!), Boris’s birthday (bacon! Mm, salty), and, of course, Joey Drew’s birthday (everyone stays overtime to wish Joey a happy birthday!)” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

This is a direct lie, or maybe this quote from The Illusion of Living is a lie, quote from pages 182-183,

“not a birthday party for yours truly, I’ve never been one really to celebrate the passing of time in that way” (Kress, A. (2021).).It’s not like so many years have passed between the books for his opinion to change like that. Both books have Bendyland in them, meaning they were written post-1940.

He has even completely made up stories, told people they were stories beforehand, and the people still fell for them being real, quote from pages 37-41 of The Illusion of Living, “the next letter I sent her [referring to Lottie], after detailing the usual how I was and what was happening, I added a new paragraph: An incredible thing has happened. Lottie, I’ll admit I thought it was all a fun game for us, but you were actually right. ZW is a real person and is the girlfriend of my former boot compatriot. His name is not John, it’s James, which I think is pretty darn close to our guess. He came by the base to meet with his former colleagues, and I happened to be in the lab when he stopped by to say hi to Corporal Arch*. He’s been injured, just his leg, shrapnel in the calf, and so was sent home. He says he was lucky to have survived. We talked for a while, and I don’t know

*NateA: When I first read this I forgot, despite Joey saying as much, that this was fiction, and spent far too much time racking my brain over who this James was. Joey is so good with his storying that even when he tells you it’s not real, you can forget a moment later. what made him notice my boots but he did, and that’s when he saw the initials. “Zelda!” he said. Yes, Lottie. Zelda. Her name is indeed Zelda. What a guess! That one was yours, I believe. I must say I was speechless, and you know that doesn’t happen to me that often. We got to talking and though our version of the story was not correct (she and he are both children of tailors, that’s how they met), she is indeed his sweetheart. Well I just had to tell him about our fanciful tales, and he loved them so much. He told me he wanted me to tell you hello, and that he hopes you’re doing well, and that you should know how much the men in France appreciate everything you gals are doing for them. We have decided to become pen pals, so I’ll keep you posted. [...] For the first time I was on the tenterhooks waiting for her reply. Weeks passed to slowly, but sure enough, eventually an envelope came with her very recognizable handwriting. Joseph! How marvelous, I never would have thought it could be real. So many stories and dreams I had as a child have been dashed in view of what I see of the world now. This is so remarkable it restores my faith in humanity, and in hope. Please tell James (that is so close, you are completely correct) and Zelda (imagine, her name is truly Zelda!) hello from me!At that point I sighed such a sigh of relief. The make-believe had worked. But not just for Lottie–it had a fantastic effect on me too. Working in the lab, though fascinating, was also mind numbing, and getting to make up these stories, set my brain ablaze. I started composing letters from “James” supposedly, transcribed by another fellow lab trainee, Nathan Arch, to Lottie*. I sent them with my letters, and told her such stories: My return home was one of the best days of my life: my whole family waiting on the platform of the train station, Zelda standing there holding an English setter puppy in her arms. Quite quickly after that the two had to get married, so detailed a simple, beautiful wedding at a country church. There were flowers, and the bride had daisies in her hair. Daises! Oh, James, tell Zelda they are my absolute favorite type of flower! I, of course, knew that. Soon after, a pregnancy was announced, and though I didn’t think the war would continue long enough for a *NateA: I don’t have any recollection of doing this. baby to be born, sure enough, it did. And a little boy named Timothy entered into the lives of Zelda and James. [...] NateA: I have gone through every piece of correspondence Joey ever saved as part of my work preserving his memory and documenting his life, and I must confess I was looking forward to reading Lottie’s letters in person, having been moved to tears reading this part of the original manuscript thirty years ago. Unfortunately, I have not been able to find them. It is possible they were lost to time, and I do deep down hope that to be true. However, even if this story ends up being revealed to be one of Joey’s excellent fictions, I think it doesn’t really matter. Joey would, of course, call it another example of his illusion. I think the message in the story is meaningful regardless whether it really happened or not. And regardless if Lottie actually herself existed or not, she is a fine embodiment of the brave women who served our country in war” (Kress, A. (2021).).

2. Minimize or discourage access to non-cult sources of information, including:

 a. Internet, TV, radio, books, articles, newspapers, magazines, media - Joey wrote his own book. The studio is covered in copies

(YouTube. (2022, April 3).) One copy is placed in the “6 ritual items” he had employees pick out of their own things (Staff, S. I. (2019).).  

b. Critical information - Only tells people what they need to know (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).  

c. Former members - When Henry left, all communication was cut off for decades

(YouTube. (2022, April 3).)

 d. Keep members busy so they don’t have time to think and investigate - Everyone is expected to work long hours (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

e. Control through cell phone with texting, calls, internet tracking - Weren’t around at the time.

3. Compartmentalize information into Outsider vs. Insider doctrine:

 a. Ensure that information is not freely accessible - Joey is open about keeping certain information from his employees (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

b. Control information at different levels and missions within group - Cohen knows about the IRS fraud Joey is committing (Grant Cohen. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). Thomas runs the ink machine (Thomas Connor. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). Wally doesn’t seem to know anything, but he is suspicious (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Dale Little complains about Gent’s security around the studio, adding new codes to doors, but not telling why, despite him having to memorize the code, and according to the way he talks, would get in serious trouble if the codes got out (YouTube. (2022, November 18).).

c. Allow only leadership to decide who needs to know what and when - Joey says to “trust your leader” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

4. Encourage spying on other members: a. Impose a buddy system to monitor and control member - Many of them work in pairs. Bertrum & Lacie (Staff, S. I. (2019).). Wally & Thomas (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Buddy & Dot (Dreams come to life. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). Sammy & Jack (Kress, A. (2021).). 

b. Report deviant thoughts, feelings and actions to leadership - Norman thinks about telling Joey about Sammy's unusual behavior (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). 

c. Ensure that individual behavior is monitored by group - Everyone keeps an eye on everyone. It’s a small group. Norman is spying on everyone (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Grace Conway mentions in her audio log about spying on people from the shadow. What’s interesting here is that she mentions Norman by name, “as old Norman would often say, “people really become themselves when they’re hidden in shadow,” that creepy guy always had a story to tell about this place. But I think I've found a few narrow passages even he didn't know about” (Dark places. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). (YouTube. (2022, November 18).). This is very interesting, as it implies, at least to me, that Norman was teaching her how to spy on people and about the hidden passages that are in the studio.

5. Extensive use of cult-generated information and propaganda, including:

 a. Newsletters, magazines, journals, audiotapes, videotapes, YouTube, movies and other media - The studio is covered in audiotapes (Audio Log. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). The Bendy cartoons are most of their life, and Joey wrote a book (Kress, A. (2021).).

b. Misquoting statements or using them out of context from non-cult sources - Quote from pages 63-65 of The Illusion of Living,

““‘I think therefore I am,’ sure why not?” I said to Arch once. I was a little bored in the lab and was thinking about one of those texts that I thought deeply silly. Arch for his part was bent over a telegraph sounder, replacing the return spring. His nose was so close to the device it was almost touching it. “You do what?” he asked, not looking up.

“This fellow named Descartes writes a whole book and in the end it’s just ‘I think therefore I am.’”I sat back up and stretched my neck out. “What does that even mean?”

“Read the book,” I replied. Then I laughed when he finally looked up and gave me that classic annoyed Arch look. “It means that because I can think I know I exist.”

Arch stared at me for a moment, furrowing his eyebrows. He already had deep thought lines in his forehead. Even at this young an age, this was a man who contemplated everything. “But…I exist.”

“You do.”

“I mean…I know I exist.”

“But what if you don’t?” I said. I wasn’t that interested in a lesson, but I did always end up being everyone’s teacher. “But I do,” he repeated, looking even more perplexed. “How do you know you do?” Arch somehow managed to furrow his eyebrows and open his eyes wide at the same time. He was pained, I could tell. I stifled a laugh. He held up his hand. “This is my hand, I can see it, my other hand doesn’t go through it like it’s a ghost hand or anything.” He took the time to double-check this and clasped his hands together. “I’m here.”

I nodded.

“And you can see me and you are talking to me,” he added. “So I am here.”

I nodded again. “Am I here?”

Arch leaned back in amazement. “I…yes, of course you are. I can see you.”

“Maybe I’m not here, maybe your hand isn’t here, maybe everything is a manifestation.” This was the silliness I was talking about with these great philosophers. Seemed more to me like a parlor trick than anything profound. Though there was, I had to confess, some fun to be had with all this. “But I have to be here in some way. I have to exist in some way.” He definitely was sounding less sure of himself. Poor Arch, old chum.

“Why?” He was getting there, and I was having fun. “Because at the least, the part of me that can ask the question if I’m here or not exists because I am asking the question.”

“So…” I turned my hand outward, leading him to the conclusion. “I…think therefore I am?” he asked slowly. I shrugged. “Yup.”

Arch laughed to himself and shook his head. He turned back to his work for a moment, then looked up at me again. “You really believe that?”

“I don’t know; I don’t really care about it,” I replied.

“Then what was the point of this whole conversation?”

“For the fun of it.”” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Nathan has left the following on the bottom of page 65,

“I have no memory of this conversation, and I think it’s likely this happened with one of the other chaps in the lab” (Kress, A. (2021).). We can’t believe Nathan here, as we’ve proven he’s lied before about things Joey has said before, so he’s been proven to be an unreliable narrator.

In an audio tape, most likely meant for employees of the studio, Joey says,

“it’s been said that dreaming can make it so! And my friends! It has! 1931 is going to be an amazing year at Joey Drew Studios” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

6. Unethical use of confession:

 a.  Information about sins used to disrupt and/or dissolve identity boundaries - Susie wants to be the perfect Alice Angel. In her mind, Alice is entirely perfect. Joey reinforces her delusion by calling her Alice and turning her into Alice (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). He even keeps her locked in a room (Twisted alice. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). I bring up the fact that she was locked in a room, as that’s a very common thing cult leaders will do to members to have them repent for their sins.

 b. Withholding forgiveness or absolution - Joey encourages Susie’s need for perfection to be the perfect Alice. He even told her she was perfect for the role (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). And even after being turned into Alice, she kept killed Boris’ and had the corpses laid out in a maze to try and achieve perfection (Bendy and the ink machine: Chapter 3 - Rise and Fall. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). Even though it isn’t spoken about, it seems like Susie isn’t just doing this for herself but also Joey. 

 c. Manipulation of memory, possible false memories - When Sammy sees Henry, he doesn’t know who he is. He starts to recognize Henry for a split second but quickly snaps out of it. Instead, he is more interested in appeasing Bendy (YouTube. (2018, May 1).).

1. Require members to internalize the group’s doctrine as truth:

 a. Adopting the group’s ‘map of reality’ as reality - Susie starts to identify as Alice Angel. Joey accepts and encourages it (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). He puts people through the machine to become these creations (Ink machine. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).). He also tells everyone in the office not to question his actions (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). He doesn’t even believe in what he is preaching. He is caught calling it “trash” and “slop.” He wants the word “dreaming” to be used more (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Also, it feels like he wants them more focused on a dream world than reality. 

 b. Instill black and white thinking - Joey doesn’t like criticism. He doesn’t like people questioning him. He is always on about the “big picture.” Don’t think about those things. Everything is normal. He doesn’t want people to question odd stuff in the office (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

 c. Decide between good vs. evil - No proof of this.

 d. Organize people into us vs. them (insiders vs. outsiders) - Joey says someone in the office is spreading a lie that the studio is not doing financially well. He calls it a slanderous lie against “us.” Speaking as “us” being the studio (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).This also instills fear of a traitor being in the group's mist, someone who doesn’t trust them.

2. Change person’s name and identity - Joey allowed and encouraged Susie to take on the identity of Alice Angel. He calls Susie that before she uses the name (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). He calls Bertrum by a nickname he doesn’t like (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). This is odd behavior for Joey because he is sensitive about people calling him Joesph instead of Joey (Kress, A. (2021).). You’d think someone with that issue would be sensitive to others and this topic. It’s almost like he’s doing it on purpose. 

3. Use of loaded language and clichés which constrict knowledge, stop critical thoughts and reduce complexities into platitudinous buzz words - Joey is doing this by saying “dreaming” over and over. He even admits it is, saying people eat that stuff up (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Quote from page 170 of the employee handbook,

“personally, we recommend decorating your workspace with a favorite motivational quote. Mister Drew’s is “Dreaming! Dreaming! Dreaming” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Also, a quote from pages 9-10 of The Illusion of Living,

“or as I like to say, “Dreams come true.” Ha! If you work for me at my now world-famous animation studio, Joey Drew Studios, you will have heard me say that more then once. I hope you don’t mind me repeating it. It isn’t some pat phrase to inspire people or remind my employees what they are working for. It’s reality. It’s real. Your dreams can come true” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He once again repeats the dreams motif in the employee handbook, page 194,

“Dreams, dreams, dreams” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Then again on the final page,

“and if you ever feel lost, just remember:

Dreams. Come. True” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

4. Encourage only ‘good and proper’ thoughts - He tells people not to listen to any rumors they hear about the financial status of the company. Instead, he tells them to “trust their leader” and just do whatever it is they do (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

5. Hypnotic techniques are used to alter mental states, undermine critical thinking and even to age regress the member - Joey calls Bertrum Bertie and Bert, names he doesn’t like.

Quote from page 209 of The Illusion of Living,

“”Come on Bert…”

“Bertrum,” he said with a wet clearing of his throat” (Kress, A. (2021).). Bertrum even says “Joey Drew introduces me, the great Bertrum Piedmont, as Bertie! Like I was his child” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Bertrum is at least 20 years older than Joey (Timeline. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).).

Joey just wasn’t calling Bertrum Bertie in front of investors, he also referred to him as Bertie in newspaper interviews, page 91 of the employee handbook,

“”I was thrilled to hire Bertrum Piedmont for this task, or Bertie, as I like to call to him”” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

He even has Bertrum referred to as Bertie in the description of Lacie’s job in the employee handbook, page 179,

“Lacie works alongside Special Projects director Bertie Piedmont to help bring the Bendyland dream to life” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Joey also takes on a more parental role to other people, page 59,

“she [referring to Abby] might have introduced me to art, but I introduced her to so many new books and ideas that I always felt a bit like a mentor to her. Still do” (Kress, A. (2021).).

6. Memories are manipulated and false memories are created - Sammy forgets who Henry is (YouTube. (2018, May 1).).

7. Teaching thought-stopping techniques which shut down reality testing by stopping negative thoughts and allowing only positive thoughts, including:

a. Denial, rationalization, justification, wishful thinking - Joey has destroyed Sammy to the point where he worships Bendy and is willing to kill for him (YouTube. (2018, May 1).).

b. Chanting - Repeats phrases (Sammy (monster). Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).).

c. Meditating - Doesn’t seem to apply.

d. Praying - Sammy starts praying to bendy, saying amen when talking about Bendy (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

e. Speaking in tongues - Doesn't seem to apply

f. Singing or humming -  Joey doesn’t, but Sammy does (Sammy (monster). Bendy Wiki. (n.d.).).

8. Rejection of rational analysis, critical thinking, constructive criticism - Joey tells people not to ask questions (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). He doesn’t take criticism well but picks apart what other people do. For example, Bertrum complains about him constantly making notes on his drawings while initially saying he believed in his “eye” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

9. Forbid critical questions about leader, doctrine, or policy allowed - Joey tells his employees not to question their leader and just do whatever they do (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

10. Labeling alternative belief systems as illegitimate, evil, or not useful - Joey says that people spreading rumors that the studio isn’t doing well are spreading “slanderous lies” about them (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

11. Instill new “map of reality” - He wants to make his creations real and is willing to use the people who work in the studio to do it. He makes Susie want to be Alice Angel (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

1. Manipulate and narrow the range of feelings – some emotions and/or needs are deemed as evil, wrong or selfish - Work hard. Work happy (" Travaille Dur, Travaille heureux ": Bendy y la máquina de tinta, Bendy y Boris, imagenes de videojuegos. Pinterest. (2017, October 8).).

According to the employee handbook, page 183,

“poor attitudes, negativity, and gossip distract from our sacred mission to bring joy to the children of the world. Termination will be considered if such behavior becomes prevalent in your work, so be sure to put on a smile at all times” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Quote from page 84 of The Illusion of Living,

“I had known they were going to laugh and they did. How wonderful having such control! How easy for someone like me” (Kress, A. (2021).). Joey here is praising himself for manipulating, in a way, the audience to laugh and be happy.

2. Teach emotion-stopping techniques to block feelings of homesickness, anger, doubt - Joey encourages people to work hard, focus on their jobs, and not question them (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

3. Make the person feel that problems are always their own fault, never the leader’s or the group’s fault - Thomas’ is blamed entirely for Bendy coming out the way he did (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

4. Promote feelings of guilt or unworthiness, such as:

a. Identity guilt - Joey is pushing Susie to be Alice. While she does love her role already, he is feeding it by calling her Alice (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). He also told her how perfect she was for the role (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

b. You are not living up to your potential - Joey is always picking apart Bertrum’s ideas and drawings. When Joey first met him, he told him he had perfect ideas. It seemed like Joey had a lot of confidence in him. And that maybe Bertrum isn’t living up to what Joey thought he would be (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

c. Your family is deficient - No proof of this

d. Your past is suspect - No proof of this.

e. Your affiliations are unwise - No proof of this.

f. Your thoughts, feelings, actions are irrelevant or selfish - Sammy is a bit pushy and demanding according to the tapes we hear (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). However, when we meet him as Henry, he is more humbled and seems only interested in pleasing Bendy. Something has changed (YouTube. (2018, May 1).).

g. Social guilt - No proof of this.

h. Historical guilt -No proof of this.

5. Instill fear, such as fear of:

a. Thinking independently - When Sammy sees us as Henry, he starts to recognize him. Then he quickly snaps it out of it. He seemed focused on making Bendy happy (YouTube. (2018, May 1).). Joey tells his employees to listen to and trust him (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

b. The outside world - No proof of this.

c. Enemies - No proof of this.

d. Losing one’s salvation - Susie is obsessed with being perfect, especially the perfect Alice Angel. This is her version of salvation (YouTube. (2017, October 13).).

e. Leaving or being shunned by the group - Susie feels like it's the end of the world when she is replaced. She doesn’t feel like she is just losing a job or position. Instead, it feels like her family, or some other group is rejecting her (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).She was using the name Alice and seemed devoted to not just playing the character but becoming the character(YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

f. Other’s disapproval - Bertrum is obsessed with approval. All he wants to do is impress those around him. Joey Drew often sends his drawings back with tons of corrections (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).This doesn’t just upset Bertrum; it almost destroys him. Bertrum doesn’t want to be forgotten. He claims he won’t allow anyone, including Joey, to forget him (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

g.  Historical guilt - Does not seem to apply.

6. Extremes of emotional highs and lows – love bombing and praise one moment and then declaring you are horrible sinner - He lures people in with the promise that they are perfect for the role he needs them for. Then when he has them, he often degrades or even replaces them. He does this with Susie. He makes her believe she is the perfect person for the role of Alice. She even becomes obsessed with the part (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Only to replace her with someone else. Breaking her heart and mind (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

He hyped Susie up so much that he even threw her a party to celebrate her voicing Alice Angel, page 33 of the employee handbook,

“I’m excited to reveal that Joey Drew Studios will be embarking on a new initiative that’s sure to take our studio straight to the top!

All staff and talent are asked to gather in the main lobby at 4:30 PM this Friday to meet Alice Angel, the newest friend of Bendy and Boris the Wolf. Refreshments will be served, along with the chance to meet the voice of Alice herself, Susie Campbell. Don’t be late” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

The lunch he took her out to, appears to be a “welcome to the studio” lunch, quote from page 63 of the employee handbook,

“Joe’s Fine Dining

555 Christopher Street, New York, NY

For the finest quality at reasonable prices, Joe’s Fine Dining cannot be beat!

NO REFUNDS ACCEPTED

--------------------------------------

2 Bacon Soup

1 Linguini Alfredo

1 Filet Mignon

1 Iced Tea

1 Lemonade

1 Strawberry Cheesecake

Welcome lunch for Susie Campbell. Quite the charmer” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Susie didn’t even know she was replaced until she went to the recording booth to do her lines for Alice,

““when I walked into the recording booth today, Sammy was there with that…Allison.

Apparently, I didn’t get the memo. Alice Angel will now be voiced by Miss Allison Pendle”” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

The memo Susie is referring to is one found in the employee handbook page 58,

“from: Joey Drew

To: All Staff

Please give a warm welcome to Allison Pendle, Joey Drew Studios’ newest employee. Allison is a talented voice actress with lots of dreams. In her spare time, she loves to cook and invent recipes. I know that as soon as you meet her, you’ll be taken with her beautiful voice and charm. She’s so interesting, so… different. I have to say, I’m an instant fan.

Effective immediately, Allison will be the new voice of Alice Angel. We believe this restructure in voice talent will lead to a more cohesive character list–and more success for our dreams.

Allison will meet with Sammy Lawrence after lunch to discuss rerecording Alice Angel’s dialogue. Then I will bring her around to meet everyone.

Distribute immediately to all employees except for Susie Campbell” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

He even passive-aggressively degrades her, or maybe even Allison, as you’ll read in a second, voicing Alice Angel, page 171,

“He [referring to Bendy] can be seen in all of our greatest animated shorts” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Then earlier in the book, page 130,

““Siren Serenade” was the first Alice Angel cartoon that did not feature any other Joey Drew cast members such as Bendy or Boris” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

Joey here degrades the voice actress for being in a short that didn’t include Bendy. I say it could either be Susie or Allison, as I can’t find a release date for Siren Serenade.

Joey has this to say about the woman he replaces Susie with, Allison Pendle, on page 229 of The Illusion of Living,

“we have such talent here at Joey Drew Studios, particularly the famous Broadway actress Allison Pendle. She’s a swell gal, and a looker to boot. She’s very talented and you wouldn’t believe the different kinds of voices she can do” (Kress, A. (2021).).

I find that interesting as this is the only mention of Allison I can find in the book, and doesn’t even list her voicing Alice Angel or any of the exact popular roles in the shorts she voices, just that she’s terrific at voicing characters. That itself is love bombing. Joey is putting her higher and higher above Susie. I also couldn’t find a single mention of Susie’s name in The Illusion of Living. It almost feels like Joey is attempting to erase Susie from the studio's history.

This is also done with Bertrum. He convinces him that he’s the perfect one to build his park. Only to pick apart his designs (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

He also love-bombed Bertrum with how popular the park would be, page 100 of the employee handbook shows a few Bendyland tickets, one of the tickets is number 5,298,660 (Staff, S. I. (2019).). Joey expected over 5 million people to go to this place.

 Joey states from his first meeting with Bertrum on page 208 of The Illusion of Living,

“what a wonderful fellow, Bert is! The brain on that man. [...] We talked about the old Coney Island, the multiple parks. The innovations he’d made, the fights he’d had with those in charge. It seems everyone has a vision, and no one likes to share. Such things are not a worry in my studio.”

Joey states on page 209, 

“the fact was I knew the truth, I knew it from the moment we’d shook hands, Bert was ready to work again. And he loved my idea” (Kress, A. (2021).). Joey isn’t just love-bombing about Bertrum to Bertrum himself. He’s now love-bombing about Bertrum to the reader. He’s also attempting to control Bertrum’s feelings about joining the project by love-bombing him. He even admits it by saying right after, 

“games. People always like to play games. I like to say a thing and do a thing. But I do know, after years of observation, that this is unusual. So I’ll play along, but I wish I didn’t have to” (Kress, A. (2021).). 

Then, on pages 209-210,

 “”Bertrum, you know, I know, the waiter knows. You want to do this. And you are the only man who could do this. I can flatter you more, but I can tell you’re not the type who falls for that sort of thing”” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Then states, 

“another tip for my readers: Always say the opposite of what a person is, it’s the ultimate praise. ”So let's just agree here, heck let’s go back to the studio and have you sign on the dotted line.”

“You promise me full creative control?”

“The only person you have to answer to is me. And I’m the one who understands your creative genius. So you have nothing to fear”” (Kress, A. (2021).). This is interesting as we know that Joey returned his drawings once Bertrum was hired, with changes on them (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Despite what he says out loud to Bertrum here, this isn’t his true feelings at the time either, so it’s not like his thoughts changed during the process of designing Bendyland. As he writes on pages 208-209,

“(I’m not saying that Bert and I haven’t had the odd disagreement, but ultimately he knows that I am the boss.) [...] I attempted to explain a bit of the Illusion of Living to him then, but I could tell it was too complex a concept for him to grasp in the moment. And I didn’t need him to understand it profoundly. After all, I was steering this ship. [...] Abby and Sammy probably are the ones who best understand it and even then, it’s not to my level” (Kress, A. (2021).). It seems to me like Joey never planned on letting Bertrum have creative control in the slightest and just used it to lure him into his trap. He also compares Bertrum to Abby and Sammy, raising them higher than him.

In this conversation, he also made an interesting statement: "I’m the one who understands your creative genius” (Kress, A. (2021).). That implies that no one but Joey understands Bertrum, and it is just another way he’s trapping Bertrum into working for him. If he goes to anyone else, they won’t understand him like Joey will, or at least that’s what Joey wants to convince Bertrum of.

There seems to be a part of Bertrum. Even if it’s just his subconscious that knows Joey’s manipulating him, as on page 210, ““Well, darn it, you’ve got me, Joey, you’ve got me”” (Kress, A. (2021).). Bertrum knows deep down what Joey is doing, but he can’t say no to him.

Joey says on page 210, “I’ll be honest and say the man wasn’t wholly sold on my straightforward aesthetic. The concept of a square was too “pedestrian” as he called it. This was a man who didn’t see the value in simplicity, the beauty behind it. You need to set people at ease, make them understand where they are, make them feel at home” (Kress, A. (2021).). I find this quite interesting because this need to make people “feel at home” is what he’s trying to do to Bertrum. Make him feel like the studio is his home and that he can’t leave it. He also uses something that could be wonderful to manipulate Bertrum to stay.

He states on page 211 that “Bert was convinced of my layout plan; he eventually always realizes my ideas are best” (Kress, A. (2021).). When viewed with the previous quotes, it seems less like Bertrum realizing Joey’s ideas were better and more like he agreed to them out of fear of losing the only person he thought understood his creativity and was going to be out of a job if he didn’t agree.

Then says, “and to give the man some credit, he was the one who suggested changing the names of the individual worlds to a subset of “land.” In the end we wound up with our four parks within the park named thus: Light Land, Dark Land, Big Land, Tiny Land. So you see, I am perfectly amenable to excellent ideas” (Kress, A. (2021).). This is love-bombing as Joey is not only calling Bertrum’s ideas excellent but also because he amends to them. He’s giving Bertrum JUST enough control that he’s going to stay, but so little at the same that he constantly begs for more. 

This type of love bombing that Joey does with Bertrum is mirrored earlier in the book with Sammy Lawrence and Jack Fain. When Joey meets Sammy and Jack, he writes, on page 188, 

““I like what you do,” I said.

“Thank you, that’s awful swell of you,” replied Jack. He stretched out his hand. “Jack Fain, lyricist and wit.” I laughed as I shook his hand and he did too. Ol’ Jack always finds his own jokes the most entertaining. He might not tell the best ones, but there’s something about his laugh that’s contagious, so he always gets a good response.”

Then continued, on pages 189-190, 

“I glanced at him [referring to Jack] and saw a weary expression flit across his face before the brightness returned. It was the first inkling I had that there might be a bit of a strain between these two.

“Well I’ll get right to the point,” I said. “I need music. Good solid-quality original music. I produce the Bendy cartoons.” I waited for the appropriate reaction. Even after only two years, Bendy had made a mark on the scene. Jack was duly impressed, Sammy was unreadable. Typical Sammy. “I made a terrible mistake opening my studio and not having a real music director on board. I aim to solve that. I would be honored if you gents would be that solution.”

Jack looked thoughtful then and yet still wide-eyed and excited (he has no poker face, never did). Sammy was the one I was more interested in so I watched him closely” (Kress, A. (2021).). 

Joey here love-bombs Jack’s writing with lots of praise, then the same with Sammy’s ability to compose. He knows that if he says he’s “honored” to work with them, they’ll be more willing to stay when things go wrong. They’re “being honored” by Joey, after all. 

There’s a really interesting section before Joey first talks to Sammy and Jack, page 185

“”for those of you who don’t know me, I’m Jack Fain.” The man tipped his bowler in our direction. I understood now why he was still wearing it even indoors. His whole outfit was a kind of costume in a way. He wasn’t in a tux or a dinner jacket either. Instead he was in dark gray wool trousers with red suspenders, a white button-up shirt beneath an orange vest and brown bow tie. He fit the description of “a character” to a tee. Sammy Lawrence on the other hand was in a neat simple black evening suit and looked totally appropriate for an opening night party. Though I suppose his hair could have been slicked back a bit more, not quite so long and floppy as it was. As it still is” (Kress, A. (2021).).

I wanted to bring this up as he hasn’t even spoken to them yet in the book, but he’s already love-bombing Sammy and is putting him higher than Jack. As if he wanted to pin the two against each other. Also, while he is love-bombing Sammy here, he degrades and puts him down by saying, “though I suppose his hair could have been slicked back a bit more, not quite so long and floppy as it was. As it still is” (Kress, A. (2021).).

I also noticed that Joey says, “a real music director” he’s love-bombing Sammy right there. Already establishing that he IS a real music director without ever having stepped foot inside a studio. It’s clear Jack easily fell into this love-bombing trap, but it took just a slight nudge, the studio tour, to trap Sammy fully, pages 193-194, 

“Finally Sammy spoke up again. “I want full creative control over my department. I want to hire my own people. And if the pay isn’t good, I’m not signing the contract.”

Jack and I smiled at each other.

“Done and done,” I replied. Sammy didn’t say anything, we didn’t shake hands. He just stood up and left the room.

“Ol’ Sammy, a man who knows his own mind,” said Jack with a laugh. He extended his hand, so I shook his instead. “Just make sure the checks arrive on time and I’m good.”

They joined the studio two weeks later” (Kress, A. (2021).).

It also seems to me that the “real music director” comment from Joey is what led Sammy to put one foot in the trap and be willing to throw his entire body in blindly as a few before, page 187; this happens,

““Now that was a song,” I said as Sammy walked over in my direction. He stopped to look at me in that way of his. Always suspicious, always looking for something more. He was a couple years younger than me but seemed like a fellow who had lived several lifetimes already.

“You liked that?” asked Jack, joining us in a wave of energy and sweat. Close up I could see his brow was glistening and his breath was short. It was like he’d just run a race.

“I’d like to talk to you two,” I said, smiling as warmly as I could. I wanted them to know I was a friend. But of course Sammy just stared back at me.

“About what?” he asked curtly.

“Let’s step out onto the terrace so we don’t need to shout at each other over the noise,” I replied.

“Good idea, I could use some air,” said Jack, taking off his bowler hat and fanning himself with it.

Sammy reluctantly nodded” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey points out something very interesting here about Sammy, “he was a couple years younger than me but seemed like a fellow who had lived several lifetimes already.” I find this interesting because Joey is not only the boss in the relationship but also manipulating, love-bombing, degrading and putting down an employee, not just an employee. He’s doing it to an employee he knows and points out is YEARS younger than him. When accompanied by that age difference, in the real world, these traits would be a grooming and emotionally and mentally abusive relationship. Grooming isn’t just sexual. There are multiple different types of grooming. The sexual type just happens to be the most typical. You can groom someone to do just about anything. Once I realized what Joey was doing would be grooming, I was curious and looked up the stages of grooming. The amount of stages he did with Sammy is outright disturbing.

Stage 1: Targeting a Victim - Joey targeted Sammy the night of the dinner party in the book (Kress, A. (2021).).

Stage 2: Gaining Trust - Trust was gained when Joey called him a “real music director” and promised that he wouldn’t visit him unless they had a scheduled meeting (Kress, A. (2021).).

During this stage, the groomer is likely to do any of the following:

give small gifts

make promises

take special outings

provide individual attention

discuss personal life

share secrets

play games

provide access to cigarettes, drugs, or alcohol (What is sexual grooming? identifying the 6 stages. Lewis and Llewellyn. (2019, June 6).).

I would like to go over each point here individually.

I don’t have any proof that Joey gave out gifts to Sammy, but we do know that he took Susie to lunch, most likely as a “reward” or “gift,” so I wouldn’t put it past him (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

Joey constantly makes promises to Sammy. One is that he won’t visit music without scheduling a meeting beforehand because he understands that Sammy needs privacy to work (Kress, A. (2021).).

I don’t have proof of individual outings, but once again, he did take Susie out by herself, so it wouldn’t be shocking if he did the same with Sammy (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

Joey gives Sammy one-on-one meetings, in my opinion, that would fall under “provide individual attention,” not only that, but their meeting is also the first meeting Joey has every day, page 225,

“9:00 am.:The first of my daily meetings. This one is with Sammy. The man is punctual and brief. We always schedule a full fifteen minutes and he rarely takes more then five” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey openly discusses his personal life with Sammy once they get to talking at the dinner party, pages 188-189,

““Why do I know you? he asked then. He was looking at me carefully now. Not in the same suspicious manner. He was truly trying to figure out the answer to his question.

“I go to a lot of shows, I’m a man about town,” I replied.

He shook his head. “That’s not it.”

He leaned back on both elbows on the stone wall. Beneath him Fifth Avenue roared and certain death would come to anyone who toppled over the edge down onto it. The man definitely had confidence in that wall. I had a sudden urge to give him a shove. Not push him over, but just to see his reaction. This might sound strange, but I needed to see a human moment from him, I needed to see the man he was hiding from me. That’s the trouble when you’re interested in re-creating the illusion of the world. You want to see the truth of it as much as possible. “Joey Drew Studios,” he said again, mulling it over. “So like film?”

I nodded. “Sure, like that,” I replied. If he was going to be coy, I would match it. The best way to get people to trust you is to match and mimic their behavior.

“You like movies,” he said, nodding back. Was he imitating me now?

“I do.”

He snapped his fingers and tossed the cigarette over the side of the building. “I know you! You used to come to the Grand almost every day. Sat down near the front, always by yourself.”

I stared at him in shock, and that was when the memories came flooding back. The ones of him playing the piano along with the movies. That was him. That was the same fellow. I knew I knew him from somewhere! I knew my gut instinctively understood his genius.

“That was me, I remember you now. You are quite the talent,” I replied.

“I know,” he said” (Kress, A. (2021).).

This is strangely intimate, despite it being their first talk. Even Jack seems put off by it, page 189,

“well this is a fun memory lane to travel down, but since I’m not a part of this journey, I’d like to bring us back to the present and include me again,” said Jack. I glanced at him and saw a weary expression flit across his face before the brightness returned to it” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey has certain things known to a few employees, so it wouldn’t be shocking to me if Sammy were told a few of the secrets of the studio.

He is always playing games with his employees, mostly mind games. 

Sammy does smoke, and Joey doesn’t seem to have any problem with it, page 188,

“”and what’s a Joey Drew Studios?” asked Sammy, lighting a cigarette from the darkness by the stone wall at the edge of the terrace” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey is more concerned with Sammy’s tone at that moment, page 188 “yes, he said it in that dismissive tone. I didn’t understand why he needed to talk to me like that. I didn’t respect it” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Stage 3: Filling a Need

Quote from Lewis & Llewellyn LLP’s sexual abuse law firm website, 

“Offenders may prey on [a teen’s] insecurities by lavishing the victim with praise and emphasizing the “unique nature” of their “loving” and “exclusive” relationship” (What is sexual grooming? identifying the 6 stages. Lewis and Llewellyn. (2019, June 6).).

Joey is constantly praising Sammy.

Stage 4: Isolating the Person

Another quote from Lewis & Llewellyn LLP’s sexual abuse law firm website,

“The groomer works hard to separate the victim not just physically, but also emotionally, from their support network of others who may be watchful or helpful. At this stage, groomers often emphasize the special nature of the relationship and urge secrecy. They may accuse others of being “jealous,” “overprotective,” or seeking to “ruin what they’ve got.” Excuses for keeping interactions private are designed to make victims feel flattered and special“ (What is sexual grooming? identifying the 6 stages. Lewis and Llewellyn. (2019, June 6).).

First, Joey does isolate Sammy. He traps him in the music department when the ink overflows the music department (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). It also seems he was emotionally isolating Sammy, based on their interactions from The Illusion of Living (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey does say this about those that leave the studio, page 182,

“they really will never get another opportunity quite as wonderful as working at the studio, that’s for sure” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He also constantly praises Sammy’s piano skills, page 189,

“”that was me, I remember you now. You are quite the talent,” I replied.

“I know,” he said” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Stage 5: Sexual Contact

There’s no proof of them ever having sexual contact, but I can see Joey doing this to control many of his employees.

Stage 6: Maintaining Control

The abuser may:

blame the victim:

use fear: 

threaten the victim:

increase violence: 

use sympathy: 

employ confusion:

I can’t find something direct that talks about Joey blaming Sammy for something, but we do know that Joey blames Thomas Connor entirely for things that he should take the blame for as well, so it wouldn’t be shocking if he also did this with Sammy (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

Joey uses fear as a common reason on how to get his employees to stay, page 182,

“they really will never get another opportunity quite as wonderful as working at the studio, that’s for sure” (Kress, A. (2021).).

While some might not consider this next part threatening/violent, I would, page 182,

“That’s why everyone at Joey Drew Studios is such a fan of Bendy and all our creations. If they aren’t, then they need to leave. Just like Henry Stein did” (Kress, A. (2021).).

I can’t find an example of him doing the last two to Sammy, but I wouldn’t be shocked if he did.

On page 194, Joey says that Sammy is one of his “greatest accomplishments” (Kress, A. (2021).). I find this very bizarre as he’s talking about Sammy as if he’s a show dog or something he’s bred or created. He also says he’d “never trade Sammy Lawrence for anything” (Kress, A. (2021).). This also feels like Sammy is just a pet or an object he can trade or discard when he gets bored of him. Then on the same page, he states, “his creativity is pure brilliance and he always chooses the best people. His musicians worship him, he’s almost a god to them” (Kress, A. (2021).). Joey here is love-bombing Sammy while also treating him like a pet or plaything. It’s his way of keeping Sammy at the studio. Treat him with so much love he doesn’t want to leave, but demean him at the time, so he feels like he can’t leave.

He does this on page 187,

“honestly, still don’t know to this day what makes him a grouch, but if being a grouch means beautiful music. I have no problem with that, I’ll tell you” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Grouch seems to be an understatement about the way Sammy was acting, quote from page 43 of the employee handbook,

“from: Sammy Lawrence

To: All Staff Regarding the Music Department

Musical instruments aren’t just for fun. We do serious work here at the Music Department. While I know it may be tempting, please refrain from playing musical instruments in our corridors.

Just last week I had to rerecord a song because someone was plucking a banjo just outside the recording studio. Whoever it was, please stop it. And please, everyone, stop making so much noise in general. No more loud shoes, whistling, humming, or gum chewing by the Music Department.

You have been warned” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

While I agree with the banjo part, asking people not to hum and whistle while in a MUSIC department, is a bit extreme.

Joey degrades and then praises Sammy within one sentence. At this point, I’m honestly amazed by how much love-bombing this man can do.

I also noticed this section on pages 181-182,

“good music really brings you into the moment, but badly done music, that just ruins the whole thing. So you better believe that for Joey Drew Studios I made sure to hire the best. Because you know what the best do? They don’t play along with prewritten sheet music to a silent movie. No. They improvise every time. They watch the film and play as they watch and feel the emotions run through their body and out their fingers onto the keys. They create art with the melody.

And boy oh boy, let me tell you, that’s what Sammy Lawrence does.

I wouldn’t say I was lucky to get him as part of my team, nor that I’m lucky he’s stayed with me all these years, though I’ve been told that in the past and I happily say,”Darn right I am!” when people say it. But, as I always say, luck had nothing to do with it. It was my research, my ability to understand and appreciate true talent, and of course, my vision that inspired others to want to work for me. After all, I can’t make anyone do anything, even as a boss; they have to want to. That’s why everyone at Joey Drew Studios is such a fan of Bendy and all our creations. If they aren’t, then they need to leave. Just like Henry Stein did. I never feel resentful on the rare occasion this happens, of course, I just feel sad. Not for me–I can always find more talent–but for them. They really will never get another opportunity quite as wonderful as working at the studio, that’s for sure” (Kress, A. (2021).).

There are quite a few contradictions in this statement and quite a lot of love-bombing. While most of the love bombing is directed towards Sammy, Joey is love bombing the other employees by saying “my vision that inspired others to want to work for me. After all, I can’t make anyone do anything, even as a boss; they have to want to. That’s why everyone at Joey Drew Studios is such a big fan of Bendy and all our creations” (Kress, A. (2021).).

The first contradiction I’d like to point out here is how Joey says, “but, as I always say, luck had nothing to do with it. It was my research, my ability to understand and appreciate true talent, and of course, my vision that inspired others to want to work for me” when talking about getting Sammy on board for the studio. (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey didn’t go out looking for Sammy, page 182,

“I met Sammy Lawrence quite by accident, at a party” (Kress, A. (2021).).

I’d also like to point at Joey saying,

“that’s why everyone at Joey Drew Studios is such a fan of Bendy and all our creations. If they aren’t, then they need to leave. Just like Henry Stein did. I never feel resentful on the rare occasion this happens, of course” (Kress, A. (2021).).

This is very bizarre as we know that once Henry left, Joey cut off all contact (YouTube. (2022, April 3).). If anything, it appears that Joey was extremely resentful as in chapter five of Bendy and the Ink Machine, The Last Reel, Joey says this to Henry in his apartment,

“The truth is, you were always so good at pushing, old friend….pushing me to do the right thing. You should have pushed a little harder” (YouTube. (2022, April 3).).

There’s other parts of The Illusion of Living where Joey is clearly resentful of/about Henry, pages 176-177,

“Henry left for his own reasons, and the correspondence between us became less and less. To be honest, it was almost like a weight off when he left. He had grown more sensitive as the studio became more successful and giving him pep talks had become exhausting for me. All the good qualities he brought, the hard work and diligence, were being undermined by a restless need for something different. Something that wasn’t Bendy. I will never understand that drive. Bendy was and is perfection.

It’s fascinating. Henry was never the showman like I was. He didn’t tend to be easily remembered by those who met him when we did business. I was invariably the face of the company, the one introduced first at a gala, the one to whom people slipped their business cards. Yet in the end he ended up setting up camp in this small corner of my memory. I can’t deny that he is tied to the creation of Bendy, to the creation of the studio itself.

That one time, in one small apartment, one too warm evening, we had been partners.

He’ll always be there, in the dark recesses of my mind. Always linked to me in that way.

Funny how the forgettable man is now forever in my mind.

You can’t predict how these things will happen.

They just happen” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Also, page 172,

““sure thing,” said Henry. He pulled out a fresh paper and a pencil and sat himself on the ground opposite me. I did and always will appreciate his keenness to work, this was one of the reasons we became partners after all. There were several decent reasons I made the choice I did. Hard work is extremely important to me, and while his talent was never at genius level, I do truly think he might have made something of his life had he not given up after a year” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Then on pages 68-69,

“we spent the afternoon walking slowly around the rooms, looking at Manet, Degas, and Cezanne. “So many of my friends in the art world always say that I’m rebelling by loving the impressionists so much,” she said with a laugh.

“Really?”

“They are all modernists. They think they are rebellious. Then I have this one friend, Henry, who you’ll meet someday I’m sure, he jokes about it a lot.”

“Why?”

“Well, he likes to create comics characters, like in the papers. ‘How can a comics character be impressionistic?’ he says.”

I shook my head. I didn’t know this Henry at all at this point (she was right in that I did soon meet him because of her), but he clearly lacked imagination. And he certainly didn’t understand the concept of the Illusion of Living. Not that I had, at that time, devised the name of my philosophy, but even then I understood that to create something real, you had to take liberties. Like these artists.

“It’s so simple, how can he not understand?” I said with a sigh.

“He has a gut instinct about things, understanding isn’t always necessary.” I appreciated that she defended his honor in that way, a friend does that. At the same time, sometimes that kind of blind loyalty frustrated me. I always had issues with people who tried to insist that some other person with some mediocre skill was a gifted talent. That’s not to say that Henry didn’t have abilities, but some people are the workaday people. Not the creators, the inspired, the geniuses” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He continues to be resentful of Henry in the book, pages 154-157,

“I cannot talk of either the big idea or putting the right team together without talking about Henry Stein. Though his short-lived impact on Joey Drew Studios did not live up to expectations, I would not call my choice to partner with him in establishing the studio nor have him head up Creative as a mistake. Unlike my decision not to have a proper Music Department for a few years (which I will discuss anon), Henry never held us back. His presence was helpful, I can happily admit, but his absence was even more so. Not having him at the studio ended up being one of the best things that could have happened to it. Of course, the funny thing is, I couldn’t have not had him without having him in the first place. Just like you can’t appreciate the light if you haven’t spent time in the dark, so too does a person’s absence become clear only if he has been around. So even though his time at the studio was short, I do feel a need to talk about him now, and especially because he was there the night of Bendy’s creation. And I know that’s something everyone reading this book has been waiting to read about.

I also think it’s a common courtesy to give credit where credit is due–no one can ever accuse Joey Drew of not sharing the spotlight, even those who made the smallest of contributions. Everyone has some kind of value after all.

Henry’s value revolved around the fact that he was excellent at taking direction. Was he a gifted animator? He was a good one, yes. Did he have unique ideas? I’m afraid to that I must say no. But he took direction well and was a decent delegator. As a partner he took to the tasks I assigned him with ease and was able to roll with them and expand on his own without my having to babysit. When the studio opened I surrounded him with artists of all skill levels, and the Writing Department had its own de facto leader in Mr. Hemmings, and so the whole of Creative was well managed for that first year of the company before I had to part ways with Henry.

The company went through a huge shift from when it started to a mere two years later when I took over full creative control and hired Mr. Morris as the head of the Art Department, and Sammy Lawrence as head of Music. What it became then was magic. But we all need to start somewhere, and experimentation is how all inventions begin. I learned this at the lab of course. [...] That being said I wasn’t too interested in his art, I must confess. Most of these artist types I met disappointed me immediately and I didn’t need an awkwardness with not only a new friend but also a work colleague, pretending to like his work when I didn’t, so I just tended to avoid talking about it with him whenever possible. So it was that I attended the art show because of Abby, not him” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He does it again to Henry and also degrades Abby on pages 158-160,

““would you like to see Henry’s work?” Abby asked.

I didn’t answer right away. I didn’t want to be truthful, but I hated lying to her. Fortunately, I ended up not needing to say anything anyway because Abby always somehow knew what I was thinking. “Come on, you snob. I think you might actually like his work. You always talk about your desire to communicate with the world.” She pulled me pretty hard by my elbow and genuinely yanked me across the small room.

“Not exactly,” I said, tripping over my feet and trying to remain upright. “I want to imitate it and show it back to the world.”

“Same thing,” she said, not really paying attention. It wasn’t at all, but I didn’t bother to correct her further. After all, the concept of the Illusion of Living as you, dear reader, have definitely learned in reading this book is both very complicated and very simple. It’s not something you can easily explain over the din of a crowded, airless, third-floor factory back room.

She deposited me in front of a wall of pen drawings. Compared with the brightness of the watercolors next to them, the unnecessary randomness of the installation pieces, and the creepiness of Abby's oils, it was, for want of a better word, uninspiring. I saw nothing to impress me and definitely nothing that “communicated with the world,” as she put it.

“What am I looking at?” I asked, doing everything I could not to roll my eyes.

“Aren’t they clever?” she asked.

I leaned in to examine them closer. I have to admit I have no memory of what I looked at that evening. I know there were cartoon drawings, that I saw various characters. I do recall a few were a little funny. But I do know they clarified what she’d meant about communication. They were caricatures of day-to-day people. Maybe there was a butcher in there, though I might just be confusing it with my creation, the Butcher Gang. They reminded me of comics from the papers, little short stories about people being people.

That was the moment.

That was it. Right there.

That match against the flint.

The flame.

I give the credit to Abby, even though you might think I owe it to Henry. But had she not understood on some level what I was searching for she never would have dragged me over to see Henry’s art. [...] “Joey, thanks for coming,” said Henry, approaching from behind us, I turned to look at him. He had dressed up for the event but every item of clothing looked slightly wrong. The sleeves of his shirt a bit short, his vest a bit long, his tie askew. He smiled, though, with such confidence that I couldn’t help admire him. I still do. He always was the sort of person who took leaps of faith and tackled what was right in front of him with a real sense of purpose.

“Wouldn’t have missed it,” I lied. I would have. I was, however, glad now I hadn’t” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He even shows more resentment towards Henry, page 218,

“that cocktail napkin is now on the wall. That first sketch of Bendy right beside it, two sides of the same coin. Two moments of perfect clarity. The original Joey Drew Studios sign from when we only had those two floors. A letter from Henry. You might not think I’d keep such a thing, but I do. I have no ill will toward the man as you know. Him leaving, as I said, was the best thing that could have happened to the studio. His letter reminds me of that” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey is also manipulating the employees and readers of The Illusion of Living through a quote on page 182,

“I can always find more talent–but for them. They really will never get another opportunity quite as wonderful as working at the studio, that’s for sure” (Kress, A. (2021).).

It’s not just employees he’ll love-bomb about to the reader, he also love-bombs and then degrades random people he doesn’t even speak to, pages 183-184,

“I had been invited along with others who truly appreciated a good show.

Everyone was dressed to the nines, tuxedos on the men, dresses that glittered in the light for the ladies, cigarettes at the end of long holders, crystal tumblers filled with expensive and still illegal alcohol. You would never have known the stock market had crashed one year before, that people were standing in breadlines on the streets, that lives were ruined down there, so many floors down beneath the sparkling society. I, of course, found it yet another fascinating illusion. That we could all pretend life was carrying on full of joy like nothing had happened, which, for those fortunate few, I suppose it was true.

Now, I don’t know how much time you’ve spent around actors, but there is a time at every actor party when enough alcohol has been consumed that their inner desires to be the center of attention can no longer be contained and suddenly someone decides it’s time to start singing. Hopefully, you’re lucky enough there’s at least a piano in the room. I know of nothing quite so painful and tuneless as listening to actors singing a cappella. [...] It began with the actors each choosing a song. They fought for the spotlight by pretending they didn’t care. Casually walked up to the piano wearing some extravagant outfit or other, I swear the leading lady’s dress was entirely made of strings of pearls, while making sure to eye down any of their colleagues who might have attempted to stand up” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Also, on page 184,

“Don’t get me wrong. I adore actors. They are lovely people who light up a room and can have a shocking level of generosity so long as their egos are being indulged” (Kress, A. (2021).).

This love-bombing then degrading of strangers happens earlier in the book as well, page 44,

““well, Big Deal Joey, it’s a pleasure to meet you!” she said brightly. I stuck out my hand but she grabbed me and planted a cherry-pipped kiss onto my cheek too. “I’m Gladys!”

I shook my head. “No, you’re not,” I said with a smile.

Her mouth fell open in mock shock, though I could tell she was actually surprised. “I’m not?”

“No,” I said, taking her hand and kissing it. “Tonight you are Selene, goddess of the moon!”

Oh how she laughed at that and immediately took on the role. She gave a little bow and then dragged Kyle off to the dance floor. With one little invented idea, she had become a goddess in reality. I smiled. I was good”  (Kress, A. (2021).).

He degrades others at art shows, pages 77-81,

“We [referring to Abby] didn’t really get to talk much after that point, as the room was called into silence by a tall woman dressed as, in my mind at least, the queen of the peacocks. She was draped in purple, turquoise, and navy blue, a feather boa around her neck and a silver turban on her head. It was a disaster.

“Thank you all for attending this evening’s salon.” She extended the second syllable of the word far further than it had any right to go. “I would like to begin the evening with the aria ‘O mio babbino caro’ from the great composer Puccini’s Gianni Schicchi.”

If that was how she liked to begin, who were we to stop her? Certainly, none of us could have if we had tried. She started to sing in a high but also plummy voice that was not quite on-key. She had no accompaniment and I was pretty sure that this event was not meant to be a musical one. The fixed smiles on the other members of the audience seemed to agree with me.

I spent more time watching the other people in the room than watching our host, as I always did. As you know, audiences fascinate me. Everyone was being polite, no obvious yawns or rolling of eyes. There were a few whispered conversations happening at the edge of the room, one clearly flirtatious between a young man and woman dressed in absurdly shabby clothes. He leaned in and kissed the tip of her ear, and I found that to be quite ostentatious. The four ladies squished on the small sofa were communicating with one another through little hand squeezes on the leg, or taps with a foot whenever the soprano hit a particularly piercing note.

There was a man holding a notebook who looked like he was ready to give up on music, and another older fellow beside him, his eyes closed, seemingly transported by the song. I made eye contact with a woman in her fifties with long gray hair braided over her shoulder. She gave me a wink and I realized  I had a coconspirator in a way. She too was taking in the art of the audience far more than the art on “stage.”

When our host, whom I had now decided to call Madame Peacock, finished, she also found that she would like to sing us something from Tosca, and then a ditty by Mozart. I looked at Abby, who mouthed, “I’m so sorry” back to me.

Finally Madame Peacock had had enough of sharing her gifts and the first performer of the night went up. I had thought the opera was pretty painful but I had no idea original poetry was on a whole other level. Have you ever heard someone’s original poetry? Try not to if you can.

There was a speech about the current state of German politics, then a little scene between a man and woman very much like a classic vaudeville act but without the talent. Next was a thin short man reading some kind of treatise on whether anyone could truly be good. Someone then read from a novel they were writing. Oh, to never have to hear a chapter from another unpublished novel ever again. Too many people write novels these days.

I’ll give you this, while the art presented didn’t inspire me at all , what it lacked definitely did. I was suddenly very aware of the responsibly I was taking on in my Illusion of Living. The good work I’d seen over the years, the plays and films and books that had made me think and added to solidifying my philosophy, all of that really came into sharp focus that night. Good art could change the world. But bad could definitely tarnish it.

“You didn’t enjoy yourself?” asked Abby as we walked toward the bus stop together.

“Did you honestly think I would?” I replied.

“I thought you might find it fun, yes.”

“The writing was just terrible, that little play. It was almost painful!” I said.

“Well if you think you can do any better, why don’t you write one yourself?” she said.

I had no interest in writing a play and was about it tell her so, but then I thought about it. I did love plays. I did love movies. I’d seen enough that of course I could write one. How hard could it be? Besides showing these artists types what a real work of art was…well I thought harder about it. It would be quite something to give them even a small sample of the Illusion of Living.

“If I write something will you read it with me?” I asked.

“I’m not an actress, Joey,” she said. It was too dark to see her expression but she sounded genuinely concerned.

“It’s just a reading, you’ll do swell.”

“If you insist…” she said, biting the inside of her cheeks. [...] All the moralizing I’d seen that night, philosophies discussed, it was too much and ultimately hot air. Also not very funny, and as you know, it is my firm belief that funny is the ultimate tool for communication.[...] The idea came to me then, and with little effort I wrote my play. It needed very few edits and, in fact, was practically perfect in its first draft. To say I was a natural would be bragging a bit, but I was. Is the truth bragging? I’d always had a way with words. Even Lottie had said so. I’ve always believed that hard work and practice are the most important things to get you where you want to go. But to be truly gifted at something you need to be born with an innate talent. That’s all there is to it.

The evening of the next salon arrived, and Abby and I immediately went over to Madame Peacock, dressed true to form in yet another mess of bright colors and this time a gold turban, to let her know of our plans.

“Oh, marvelous,” she said with those plummy vowels of her. “You shall close off the evening!”

“And would you do us the honor of reading a small role for us?” I asked.

The request made her puff out her chest with pride. Peacock indeed.

“But of course, my, but of course!”

I handed her a copy of the script, and she peered at the pages, clearly needing glasses but refusing to succumb to the needs of older age” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He degrades Madame Peacock later in the chapter as well, quote from page 92,

“Madame Peacock came over and complimented us and she was not one to allow others the center of attention for too long” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He also degrades people that he doesn’t even see, page 202 of The Illusion of Living,

“But again, in the spirit of honestly, it took me many years to realize what I’d been chasing.

Of course, like with all my other realizations, true understanding came to me in an instant and with great clarity. I see things in ways that most don’t. I understand things so much more quickly. This isn’t to say I am better than anyone because others aren’t like me in this way, but more to say it is yet another reason why I was put on this earth, like a messenger, like Mercury, let’s say, here to help those that can’t help themselves” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Then, with a group of other strangers and Abby on pages 69-70,

“regardless. It was because of Abby I took the odd art classes, usually late-night ones taught by failed artists who couldn’t afford to do anything but teach students who had no real talent. Obviously Abby and I were the exception [...] I could have been the head of the Art Department at my studio, but I chose to hire those who had solid work ethics, even if they were not quite as remarkably talented” (Kress, A. (2021).). He’s not only degrading strangers again, but he’s putting Abby above them, love-bombing her as he degrades them.

He once again does this on pages 75-76,

“the event took place in a large apartment on the Upper West Side, it was done up with modern Art Deco flourishes, and whoever owned it (I never did find out) clearly had some money. The guests however did not. That is to say, some of the guests did not. There were definitely the stereotypical starving artists in attendance at this party. None of them bothered to try to look dressed up for the evening, which I found odd. Stranger still, since I was not used to classes mingling in the first place, was that even those who had money were dressed like they didn’t. It was clear from the quality of their fabrics, their general cleanliness, and the shine on their shoes who the people were who had the money to afford a classic suit or an elegant dress. But it was so strange to me. I understand it, but I didn’t respect it. It was a show, some kind of demonstration that they didn’t care for material things” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Here Joey states that he doesn’t like what these wealthier people are doing, but earlier in the book stated, “I have always considered myself a humble man, in fact many have praised this quality in me. It’s true that despise my success and fame, I remain constant to my values as a person” (Kress, A. (2021).). You would think someone who thinks like this would respect more affluent people that are humble and dress down.

He also degrades his peers from when he was a child. Quote from page 61 of The Illusion of Living,

“in school reading was a core part of the curriculum, but I did just enough to get excellent grades (the amount of effort was similar to my friends just trying to pass; I was a gifted child and that meant my efforts equaled ten times as much compared with theirs)” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He again compares himself as being better than the other kids on page 196,

“mud. I have always hated the mud. The dusty side street that my father’s shoe repair window opened onto turned into a swamp even in a light spring shower. Most kids would love that kind of thing I guess, heck I saw them with my own eyes. The neighborhood kids my age playing in the muck, throwing fistfuls at one another like melting chocolate snowballs. The mud would get so thick and dark, almost oozing black. Nothing about it appealed to me as a kid. And this contempt only cemented as I got older” (Kress, A. (2021).).

When he was a kid, it wasn’t just other children he would degrade, quote from page 199 of The Illusion of Living,

“here is something that I find rather shocking within myself, but for the sake of complete honesty, which is so very important to me especially in this book, I will admit that I never was that excited by the local fairs and such that made their way through town when I was a kid. There was a delight to be sure, but there was something too artificial about their worlds. Too transient. The people who worked for them had little to no passion for their jobs, and as a child from a home with limited income, I soon discovered I preferred watching theatrical performances where the actors put everything they had within themselves despite the world around them being a mere stage. I have spent my whole life watching others, and there is a joy, to be sure, walking immersed in the fair environment. Yet, these fairs and festivals of my youth were so lacking any heart that it all just felt disappointing. The artifice was too fake. It was a lie. Not an illusion” (Kress, A. (2021).).

It’s not random adults that he degraded as a child. He even degraded his father, page 200 of The Illusion of Living,

“I don’t even remember what possessed my father to take us to visit one of the first ever permanent amusement parks in the world. There was something inside him that enjoyed whimsy, to be fair. After all, he did play make-believe with elves and such” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey is also manipulating the employees and readers of The Illusion of Living through a quote on page 182,

“I can always find more talent–but for them. They really will never get another opportunity quite as wonderful as working at the studio, that’s for sure” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Near the end of The Illusion of Living, in the “day in the life” section, Joey says this about Shawn Flynn on page 228,

“Shawn Flynn does an excellent job, but I do like to make sure that every doll looks the same and has the same kind of smile. Good thing his creativity knows no bounds even if he can get a little defensive when he needs to be corrected” (Kress, A. (2021).).

There is quite a bit to unpack here, despite it only being two sentences. The first thing I would like to address is the fact that Joey goes over every doll that is sent out from Heavenly Toys. At surface level, this seems normal, he wants to see what the product looks like, but he’s undermining Shawn’s ability to do his job by checking every single toy, especially when he also says that he “does an excellent job” and that “his creativity knows no bounds” (Kress, A. (2021).). Also, “he can get a little defensive when he needs to be corrected” is an interesting statement for Joey to make (Kress, A. (2021).).

In chapter three of Bendy and the Ink Machine, Rise and Fall, you can find an audio log by Shawn at his work area, where he says,

“"I don't be seein' what the big deal is.

So what if I went and painted some of those Bendy dolls with a crooked smile?

That's sure no reason for Mr. Drew to be flyin' off the handle at me”” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

Shawn here isn’t getting a “little defensive” over what Joey said. He’s upset that Joey screamed at him over smiles on children’s toys. This is very different then from what Joey tries to convince the reader of.

“Needs to be corrected” is also a weird quote from this section (Kress, A. (2021).). I believe Joey here is referring to what Shawn calls “flyin’ off the handle” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). Joey is attempting to show that he pays attention to his employees and that he’s willing to help them and bend things to what they need. A very false claim based on the things we’ve seen him do.

Also, in the “day in the life” section of The Illusion of Living, pages 225-226, Joey states,

“9:30 am.: Mr. Morris with the Art Department. Now, of course, this has changed to Miss. Lambert. It’s interesting to see the difference in their approaches. Morris was always a little late and always flustered, carrying piles of papers in his arms like he’d swept everything off his desk just as he was rushing to come meet with me. Quite frankly, it’s very likely that’s exactly what happened. Abby on the other hand is always early by five minutes and comes with her neat portfolio all ready for her presentation. Some might find Morris’s way a sign of his creativity but I personally find Abby’s manner much more conductive to actual brainstorming and creative conversation, and also her work far more exemplary. I’ve noticed the art coming out of the department these days has a much more finished look before I even see it” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey love-bombs about Abby while putting down another employee, having her shine more than someone, building her up, so she won’t ever want to leave the studio, and at the same time, making Morris feel that he has to rush to finish everything to make Joey happy, despite also knowing it won’t make Joey happy because it isn’t perfect.

He compares the two earlier in the book as well, page 163,

“When it came to honesty, Abby was quite expert at it. It’s why we’ve had such a good working relationship over the years and why currently she is running the Art Department while Morris is away” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He builds up Abby as being better than Morris. Knowing it’s a statement that the reader will likely believe as we know nothing about Morris besides him running the art department, having papers scattered everywhere and that he was overseas at the time the book was being written.

Then again, earlier in the book, page 157,

“she [referring to Abby] wasn’t the only artist being hosted that night, and while I always had such a great affinity for her–heck I hired her as an artist and she works for me to this day, in fact at this very moment she is our interim head of Art while Morris is overseas–her work back then was not polished. She was still playing around with her version of an impressionistic style. It never quite resonated the same way the actual impressionists did. The one thing that did work for her though was her constant dark undertones, the feeling of something sinister under the surface in all her paintings” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He does it in another section as well, pages 166-167,

“it wasn’t that Abby lacked skill, it was just she didn’t know how to draw a cartoon. Not back then at any rate. Now she’s as proficient as anyone. She always had the talent, she just needed the practice. But back then, in that little diner, her first attempt was not, well, very good” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He love-bombs her and degrades her at the same time, similar to the behavior he displays around Sammy later in the book, a second quote from further down on page 167,

“”I’ll keep playing with this,” she said as we both stood up and she gave her satchel a pat.

“Thank you,” I remember replying, not feeling very hopeful” (Kress, A. (2021).). Joey love-bombs Abby to her, but degrades her to the reader. Joey didn’t believe that one of his closest friends, would be able to emulate what he wanted, even if she tried back then.

He also love-bombs Abby and degrades random strangers again, page 204,

“I immediately asked my waiter for a pen and started sketching my thoughts on a napkin. As you know, I excelled even in that one art class I took with Abby years before. And of course at the studio there are moments when explaining simply will not do, you just have to show your team what is inside your head. Oh if only that were possible beyond the metaphor. The imperfect translation of my perfect thoughts. It’s the art of explaining that is so unappreciated. Though I am sure you will agree, having now reached the latter half of my book, in that I too excel” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey does very similar behavior to Abby and also Henry when they show up at his apartment, pages 169-171,

“I preferred going out, but I was happy to invite Abby on occasion. She had never brought a guest, I had never thought to extend the invitation beyond just her. And then suddenly there was, that Saturday night, at my door, with someone I had not ever expected to see in my home, Henry Stein.

“Abby, and …Henry,” I said. Of course I let them both in. I gave her a look as she walked past and she gave me a small sharp wink in response. What was she up to?

They sat down in my small living room, taking up the full width of my modest dark green sofa (the apartment had come furnished), so I sat on the hard wooden kitchen chair and stared at them both. “What a pleasant surprise,” I said before standing up immediately to get them something to drink from the pantry. Warm orange soda was hardly the thing for a hot night like tonight, but I was still saving for an icebox.

“Thanks,” said Henry as I passed him one.

“Always my pleasure,” I replied, sitting down on my hard chair.

“Joey, I know you’re confused about why Henry’s here. You’re too polite for your own good,” said Abby with a laugh.

“Not confused, just curious,” I replied.

“I hope you can forgive me, but I told Henry about your little devil,” she said, placing her soda on the low coffee table. It was covered in circles from watermarks of days past so I didn’t feel a need to hand out coasters.

“Oh?” I said casually, though inside I was feeling a little angry now. I don’t do well when people are disloyal, and this was something I’d expected to be kept between me and Abby. Then I stopped and controlled myself (I have excellent control over my emotions) and realized I had never actually told her there was anything secret about this. I’d have to be more careful in the future. Believe you me, I have been since. A contract is a fine thing to have between colleagues, even finer at times between friends” (Kress, A. (2021).).

What really sticks out here to me is that Abby says, “I hope you can forgive me,” it’s almost as if she knew how Joey would react. I also found Joey saying he has “excellent control over [my] emotions” to be absolutely hilarious as we know that’s not true. A quote from his Turn it Off  audio log,

“keep railing on that, get it? Dreaming! Dreaming! Dreaming!” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

It also seems that Abby knew Joey wouldn’t want to see Henry draw or hear him out, at the very least, page 171,

“I wasn’t interested in humoring him. I’d had a long week, I was feeling excited about Joey Drew Studios, I didn’t need this tonight. But I looked up with a smile, stood up, and crouched next to the table” (Kress, A. (2021).).

This isn’t even the first time he love-bombs and/or degrades them both at once, pages 161-162,

““So, Joey what do you think, your honest opinion, please,” said Henry, crossing his arms over his chest and turning back to his work.

I always inwardly shake my head when people ask for honest opinions. The only person I know who wants a truly honest opinion is me. Everyone else wants a truthful-sounding lie. They want the illusion. Ah, you knew I was going to write that now, didn’t you? Well I hope you did. Otherwise I would recommend starting this book over again.

A lie it was, of course, with a sprinkle of truth to make it palatable. “You do interesting work,” I replied. “I must say, it’s really inspired me.”

I could almost hear Abby’s eyebrows rising to the top of her forehead. She thought that the second part was the lie, but the funny thing was, as you know, it wasn’t.

“Have I?” asked Henry, looking back at me in surprise.

“Oh yes. I think, Henry, you might be accidentally responsible for charting the course for the rest of my life.” It was a dramatic thing to say but I enjoy saying dramatic things. And it wasn’t untrue entirely. While I was responsible for the course, it did feel like Henry was the young boy hiring the captain of a ship to go in search of a buried treasure he’d once heard tell of. He had no way of finding it, had no skill in sailing, but I could do the work and, as the grown-up, keep the treasure for myself.

“That’s …something,” said Abby. She sounded confused and amused.

I turned to her. “You don’t believe me, I can tell.”

Henry just stood in silence. I wasn’t sure if it was his doubt of my sincerity or more that he was overwhelmed emotionally by what I had said. I never found out, as a small man with a surprisingly low voice came over to talk to him and he turned his attention to that conversation.” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Abby is love-bombed even more in this chapter, page 176,

“Abby didn’t join the studio until three years later. When she finished art school she’d decided to give it a go as an artist herself. She didn’t do too badly, but she didn’t do well either. [...] It was shortly after that she joined the studio as an artist. She rose quickly through the ranks because I was right, all she needed was a little practice and she became the best artist on my team. Having her leading the department right now has been a complete joy” (Kress, A. (2021).). This is also controlling, as Joey states he “was right.” He’s trying to have control over Abby’s wants and desires.

I also think Abby was scared of upsetting Joey because of a quote from page 171,

“Abby and Henry never ended up working together, which I suppose is a little funny to think about considering they had been friends before I showed up on the scene. I think to this day they still keep in touch, though we never really discuss it” (Kress, A. (2021).). I believe Abby was scared of just saying Henry’s name around Joey.

Joey continues to love-bomb Abby in this book, page 77,

““did you do this? I asked.

“I did.”

It wasn’t bad. “Not bad.”

“From you that’s high praise indeed.” She didn’t say it sarcastically, by now she knew I wasn’t the kind of person to just hand out compliments” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Even during the play Joey does with her, he’s love-bombing her to the reader, quote from page 84,

“more laughter here and at this point I could sense Abby relaxing into her role. She wasn’t very good, and that was okay. But there was something so charming in how hard she was trying. Effort is all that matters so long as you have someone like me leading the way” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Despite it only being a few sentences, I would also like to draw attention to how Joey talk about Wally Franks in The Illusion of Living, pages 205-206,

“he was a good man, a solid handyman. Never complained, just did what was asked of him. A real self-starter too. I never knew when I’d run into the fellow, what time of day, where in the studio he might be. But there he would suddenly appear, fixing the projector, tinkering with the boiler, unclogging pipes. Yup, he could do plumbing too in a pinch, and I had a great deal of respect for him” (Kress, A. (2021).).

There are quite a few things we need to address here. I’ll start with the two major ones. The first one is that Joey equates “being a good man” here with “never complained.” That is extremely dangerous thinking, especially because he’s associating respecting Wally with him never complaining. The other thing also has to do with “never complained.” We know that Joey is lying, or is at least unaware (but I highly doubt that) of Wally’s complaining. Quotes from a few of Wally’s audio logs,

“so here's my beef with this whole Gent thing. I went to school, yeah, that's right, me! Star student of Brickmore High! I know my potatoes! So where's this Mr. Connor get off telling me what to do?” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).).

“These people gotta lighten up. I mean hello! You make cartoons! Your job is to make people laugh.

I'm tellin' ya, If these people don't start crackin' a smile every now and then, I'm outta here” (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). It seems to me that Joey was trying to undermine Wally’s issues with the company and change his thinking pattern to not include those kinds of thoughts by constantly praising him for how wonderful he did at his job.

It’s also not just people alive at the time that he’ll love-bomb and then degrade. Joey does this with pictures taken of a recently deceased friend, Walter Richmond, page 120,

“I turned to take in the rest of the pictures. I had to agree. I might not know a lot about art (at least I didn’t at the time, I hadn’t met Abby yet), but I knew what made something special. It’s a skill I’ve always had. There was something not quite good enough about the pictures. They were framed a little wrong, or a little out of focus. They would work as excellent historical documents for researchers later in life possibly. But even then maybe not. Faces were hard to see and words hard to read” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Joey even treats basic needs as being “love” when he complies with them, page 190 of the employee handbook,

“free toilet paper

Worried you’d have to bring your own toilet paper to the studio? Think again! The bathrooms at Joey Drew Studios are stacked with all the TP your little heart could ever desire. And it’s two-ply too. Now that’s love” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

He also degrades new hires on the final page of the employee handbook,

“Bendy is the perfect cartoon character, and the truth is, you probably won’t dream up anything quite as good as him” (Staff, S. I. (2019).).

He also love-bombs and then degrades me that are supposedly his friends, quote from page 35 of The Illusion of Living,

“as luck would have it, she [referring to Lottie] was shipped off stationed in London, which made me happy, as I knew the war was on the Continent and, while I might not have been in love with her, I thought of her fondly” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Then again love-bombs and degrades Lottie on page 36,

“I liked that she had found herself a beau, or at the least someone to give her some attention” (Kress, A. (2021).).

Another “friend” he love-bombs and then degrades in the book is Nathan Arch, pages 197-198 of The Illusion of Living,

“there was no way Arch could answer it. He was and is a highly intelligent man, but there are limits for everyone [...] Quite frankly, I was interested in being God. Ha, I know, a sacrilegious thing to say, but I know no other way of putting it. While my peers all aim for growth and money and expansion, these to me are necessary evils in order to truly capture my deepest goals. To truly change the world and how to see it.

If that isn’t godlike then I don’t know what is.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am a mortal man. But some mortals leave behind the immortal, they create a legacy that is beyond just the grit of an everyday existence. Beyond just paste and cover. They are elevated, they float, they are raised to the heavens. No farther distance can be found from the mud below. If earth is the beginning, heaven is the destination. But what is heaven? The afterlife? Of the life that exists after?

You see how my thoughts go, you see how complicated they are, this is why when Arch talks of amusements parks my stomach cliches and my jaw gets tight. But it is also why I don’t reply with anything other than “But of course.” Some things are not worth the time to explain. Though I hope he better understands when he reads this book” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He degrades Nathan again in the book, pages 214-217,

“he’d never understand. No one would ever understand. [...] I knew he respected me. Everyone does, of course. [...] He never would really understand us, but he still well, for want of a better way of phrasing it, wanted to be us.* [...]

*NateA: I think Joey could have come up with a better way of phrasing it personally because that’s nerve been true. I like me just fine. He also wasn’t quite right about my love of creative types. Most of them bore me or are far too self-indulgent, No, it was Joey I admired, and so I also admired his creativity. Isn’t it just like him not to see the compliment? [...]

“You getting cold? I’m getting cold,” said Arch. He rubbed his arms like a pantomime actor demonstrating exactly how cold he was feeling.

I wasn’t. But that’s also something special about me. I don’t tend to get overly cod, or got, or hungry, or anything. Outside forces have little impact on a body when your mind is this strong’” (Kress, A. (2021).).

He also love-bombs his driver, page 217,

“I had just hired Simmons, but already I knew this man was going to have a long career with me. He was dependable, quiet when I needed him to be, talkative enough to make me laugh, and knew the best routes through the city depending on the time of day. Like I have said many times in this book, you do your job well, no matter what it is, and there’s a place for you with Joey Drew” (Kress, A. (2021).).

7. Ritualistic and sometimes public confession of sins - Does not apply

8. Phobia indoctrination: inculcating irrational fears about leaving the group or questioning the leader’s authority:

a. No happiness or fulfillment possible outside of the group - Joey demanded trust without questions asked. People seem to trust him blindly (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). The employees seem terrified of disapproving or being cut out of the group or replaced (YouTube. (2019, March 25).). It is almost like they fear they can not be happy unless they make him happy.

b. Terrible consequences if you leave: hell, demon possession, incurable diseases, accidents, suicide, insanity, 10,000 reincarnations, etc. No proof of this.

c. Shunning of those who leave; fear of being rejected by friends and family - When Henry left, he didn’t have any contact with anyone from there. We don’t know why no other employee contacted him. Joey only reached out to past employees many years later to lure them back to the machine (YouTube. (2022, April 3).).

d. Never a legitimate reason to leave; those who leave are weak, undisciplined, unspiritual, worldly, brainwashed by family or counselor, or seduced by money, sex, or rock and roll - No proof of this.

e. Threats of harm to ex-member and family - No proof of this.

References

" Travaille Dur, Travaille heureux ": Bendy y la máquina de tinta, Bendy y Boris, imagenes de videojuegos. Pinterest. (2017, October 8). Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://www.pinterest.com/pin/747316131889167771/

Advisors, S. F. W. (2022, September 6). Steven Hassan’s BITE Model of Authoritarian Control. Freedom of Mind Resource Center. https://freedomofmind.com/cult-mind-control/bite-model/

Amino. (2020, April 28). Don’t let Joey See...: Batim Short Story. Amino. Retrieved December 25, 2022, from https://aminoapps.com/c/the-ink-machine/page/blog/dont-let-joey-see-batim-short-story/1Jza_J0dc6uzXRmwvkm0GPYnv5w36MezeE0

Audio Log. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Audio_Log

BATDR audio logs. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved December 9, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Category:BATDR_audio_logs

Bendy and the ink machine: Chapter 3 - Rise and Fall. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Bendy_and_the_Ink_Machine:_Chapter_3_-_Rise_and_Fall

Dreams come to life. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Dreams_Come_to_Life

Getting serious. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved December 10, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Getting_Serious

Grant Cohen. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Grant_Cohen

Indiscernible. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Indiscernible

Ink machine. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Ink_Machine

Joey Drew Studios. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Joey_Drew_Studios

Kress, A. (2021). Bendy: The illusion of living: An original Joey Drew Memoir. Scholastic Inc.

Staff, S. I. (2019). Joey Drew Studios Employee Handbook. Scholastic, Incorporated.

The archive. Joey Drew Studios. (n.d.). Retrieved December 14, 2022, from https://www.joeydrewstudios.com/archive

Thomas Connor. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Thomas_Connor

Timeline. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved November 17, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Timeline

Twisted alice. Bendy Wiki. (n.d.). Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://bendy.fandom.com/wiki/Twisted_Alice

Vacations with pay in union agreements, - JSTOR. (n.d.). Retrieved December 24, 2022, from https://www.jstor.org/stable/41816194

What is sexual grooming? identifying the 6 stages. Lewis and Llewellyn. (2019, June 6). Retrieved December 15, 2022, from https://sexualabuselawfirm.com/blog/what-is-sexual-grooming-identifying-the-6-stages/

YouTube. (2017, October 13). Batim: Chapter 3 all alice angel lines. YouTube. Retrieved November 17, 2022, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yaTpaCzwF-8

YouTube. (2018, May 1). Batim Sammy Lawrence (updated version). YouTube. Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UCKaUP6u278&t=55s

YouTube. (2019). YouTube. Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q3mpGoMt0-E.

YouTube. (2019, March 25). Batim audio logs in (almost) chronological order! YouTube. Retrieved December 23, 2022, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TeSnKNMkDg4&list=PLl_oxibUps7wF7paFLi5ZJaw0iu2PAwie&index=1

YouTube. (2021, October 13). Boris and The dark survival all tapes. YouTube. Retrieved December 23, 2022, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2savP-5Y4BY&list=PLl_oxibUps7wF7paFLi5ZJaw0iu2PAwie&index=2

YouTube. (2022, April 3). Bendy and the ink machine | full game walkthrough | no commentary. YouTube. Retrieved November 16, 2022, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ns18EHkzb20 Screenshots taken from.

YouTube. (2022, November 18). Bendy and the dark revival - all audio logs! YouTube. Retrieved December 23, 2022, from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2cHpHb_vXIE&list=PLl_oxibUps7wF7paFLi5ZJaw0iu2PAwie&index=4

[wishingforatypewriter]

Dreams and Doubts

For Baatar Jr. Week (Day 1: Dreams) @baatarjrweek

Read on Ao3

According to the family lore, Baatar’s mother had seen Zaofu fully formed in a dream years before the first platinum dome pierced the sky. When his father was drawing his blueprints for the city, his main task was to bring her vision into the physical world. 

But as Baatar himself set out to redesign the Lower Ring of Ba Sing Se, there was no vivid dream to guide him. Though she was in many respects the muse that fueled his work, Kuvira thought in units built and roads repaved, not fragments and poetry like his mother. He had known even before they left Zaofu that the aesthetic decisions surrounding the project would have to come from him alone. 

As he sat behind the desk in the spare bedroom he and Kuvira were using as a shared office, trying to turn his notes about power grids and water lines into a place people could inhabit, Baatar felt a familiar uncertainty rise within him. 

He had only ever managed his parents’ building projects, all his original designs either rejected or modified to the point of unrecognizability. How could someone like him even begin to tamper with one of the oldest, largest cities in the world?  

He ran a hand down the length of his face and then brought an eraser to his sketch of the Loongkau District. His engineering corps was scheduled to start work there in the coming weeks and he still hadn’t finalized the designs. 

After a few more minutes of erasing and redrawing, he crumpled the page he’d been working on and tossed it into the wastebasket that neared the point of overflowing. He was just beginning to work on his latest draft in earnest when Kuvira walked into the office, dressed in pajamas and holding a steaming cup of tea. 

Baatar smiled when he saw her in the doorway, the vise grip of anxiety momentarily releasing its hold on him. 

“What woke you up?” he asked, glancing at the clock on the wall. It was well past three in the morning and he knew she had an early start the next day. 

Kuvira merely shrugged and placed the tea down on the desk, sliding it towards him, her concern tucked neatly within the gesture.  “You haven’t been to bed yet,” she noted. “Any progress?”

Baatar ran a hand through his hair, then took a sip of the tea, letting the warm liquid and her presence soothe his nerves. “I think progress would be too great a term.” 

Kuvira glanced down at the design and made a small approving sound. Her hand rested atop his. “It has promise,” she said, “as did the last three drafts you started.” 

He cringed internally. “You saw those?” 

“You missed the wastebasket a few times,” she said, her lips curving upward into a smirk. “What was wrong with them?”

Baatar shrugged. “Nothing I come up with seems good enough.” 

Kuvira moved behind him and started rubbing his shoulders. “That’s your parents’ voices,” she whispered close to his ear. “What do you think?”

“The second draft had potential,” he said. “The one with the taller buildings, but I worry the skyline would look too much like Republic City.” 

“You won’t know that until you finish the design,” Kuvira said and left a kiss against his temple. She then gave a quiet yawn. “Trust yourself.” 

Baatar reached over for her hand and brought it to his lips. “Thank you,” he said. “You should head back to bed. You’re tired.”

“Are you coming with me?” she asked, her eyebrows raised suggestively in contrast with the sleepiness embedded in her posture. 

Baatar flushed a bit, the look in her eyes scrambling his thoughts. After a moment, he shook his head. “I’ll probably be here until I’m finished with the design.”

“Would it bother you if I watched for a while? I’ve always wondered about your process, and it’s too cold to sleep, anyway.”

“I have to warn you, it’ll be more erasing than anything,” Baatar said, even as he motioned her over. Once she was beside him, he pulled her down onto his lap. “But you might at least find it warmer here.” 

“I find those terms agreeable,” she said, making herself comfortable. 

It took all of twenty minutes for Kuvira to fall asleep curled up against his chest. Baatar continued his work well into the morning, new clarity informing his designs as the weight of her steadied him. 

He carried her into the bedroom of their Middle Ring apartment well after the day should have begun and when he finally fell asleep beside her, he dreamed of the city they would build.

#baavira #baatarjrweek #baatar jr. #kuvira #legend of korra

[bristolvinylguy]

Bristol Local Legends

2nd Band: METHODS

Based: Bath/Bristol

Members:

-Owen: Guitarist/Vocalist

-Jo: Drummer (Since late 2022)

Frequent Members:

-Ewan: Drummer, Occasional Bassist and Guitarist (while the band is a 3 piece)

Hard Rock, Blues Rock, Experimental Rock

Based in both Bath and Bristol, I saw METHODS for the first time at Dareshack on Wednesday 21 September 2022. They were opening alongside El Knight for Miss Kill’s EP launch (different line up at the time). They blew me away and gave me everything that I looked for in a band and more. Heavy riffs, powerful drumming and catchy melodies; I couldn’t help but dance to it. They were like if The White Stripes and Queens Of The Stone Age had a baby. Afterwards I immediately bought their debut album on CD off of Bandcamp. Something gave me a good feeling about these guys.

Discography

METHODS have an album and a few singles under their belt

Album:

-FeedTheWolf, September 2021, 8 Tracks

The pictures of the CD that I bought from their Bandcamp that I had mentioned earlier are at the bottom of the page. Special shoutout to Caroline for putting it together and the lovely artwork.

This is a great record, I really enjoy it. It has a great flow to it and the production of it is also very good. Owen’s guitar sounds superb throughout and the drums are pounding as they should be, everything has its place.

Track 5: Limbo (Favourite Song):

This is my favourite song on the album. It has a bluesy, almost country like feel to it with superb build up. I find the riff to be very memorable and when the bass comes in it sounds so smooth and just fits the song so well. Nice use of a simple chorus too, this band known how to bring the sound down and then erupt like a volcano.

Singles:

-Twisted Demeanour

Their best song currently for me. They open most of their sets with it and I think it works wonders within its placement as the feel of the song is very immediate within its intent. With its pounding drums and angular guitar riffs, it feels like riding a horse. Such a fantastic chorus too and I love it when Owen ascends the scales with his whammy pedal, very reminiscent of Tom Morello.

-Get Out? (ODHK Cover)

This song is an interesting one. It’s technically a cover of Get Out by ODHK, which is Owen’s solo project and METHODS do a live version of it. The original is great with a weird janky feel to it and in a live setting METHODS bring a lot more aggression and power to it, turning mysteries into answers. I can’t help but shout “GET OUT” in the verses alongside it. I feel the track is reminiscent to Queens Of The Stone Ages’ mid-to-late material, such as Tangled Up In Plaid from Lullabies To Paralyze and songs from Like Clockwork. This entire track is an interesting one to me and has a lot of potential. I can’t wait to see what they do with it!

Favourite Gig - WE NEED BANDS Showcase, Wednesday 7th June 2023:

This was a fantastic gig of theirs and a great night out in general. METHODS were joined by FLUFF, Analogue Signals and Fools Teeth, packed out in Crofters Rights Room 2. Every single song had people dancing, you just can’t stand still whilst watching METHODS. Owen and Jo were in absolute top form, putting everything into their performance. A particular standout song for me was again ‘Get Out?’ which they played live for the first time after Owen released it personally with his solo project a couple of days before. It went down really well and was a great fit for the vibe of the night. So many acts that were not afraid to jam and let loose, seeing where the night takes them.

Overall METHODS are a band that I’ve got a lot of love for. I see them going places, they’re already at a very good level with their songwriting, but it can go even further. I can’t wait to hear more from this band, I’ll always be here for it!!

#methods #hard rock #blues rock #experimental #bath scene #bristol #bristol music #rock music #Bandcamp

[distinguishedgalaxycat]

How the 10 Worst slotpg Fails of All Time Could Have Been Prevented

Mafia Wars is an online mafia game that is set in New York City and Italy with the option of traveling to other places as well. It is a multiplayer mafia game that is currently played by over 19 million people all over the world. It is known to be the best mafia game ever released and can be used on popular websites such as Facebook and MySpace. This article will explain the basics about this online mafia game and provide some hints to dominate the game. If you haven't played this game before, I recommend getting started as soon as you can as it is a great game. My other articles will provide extra hints and tips on how to master Mafia Wars.

™

It is obvious that Mafia Wars is an online mafia game where you build a mafia family. It is a multiplayer game and there are many of other people to enjoy this game with. You can build a family while working to have the strongest family in the entire multiplayer mafia game. Building a strong family consists of having money, weapons, vehicles, armour, and defense. If you build a strong family, you will have a high advantage over this entire game.

While playing this online mafia game, you get the opportunity to work different jobs for different wages. This is another very important aspect of this multiplayer mafia game because working is absolutely necessary to play a good game. It is just like in real life, to have a half decent life you need to work to make money. Just like in Mafia Wars, working to make money is absolutely crucial to having a decent game. Money is the key to everything. Don't ever forget that because a lot of people overlook this exact fact. This is why a lot of people are not successful at this game and can not master Mafia Wars. They simply think they know how to play already but always wonder why they can't build their family.

When you do different jobs in this online mafia game, you make money. After you have money, you are able to buy things such as property. This makes your status in Mafia Wars higher because you are then worth more. You level up by fighting and doing jobs because that gives you experience like none other. When you get higher levels, more people want to be in your family. When more people want to be in your family, you will have a stronger family. Unless of course, these people are not strong but if that is the case then you should not allow them to continue with your family.

The purpose of this article was to explain some of the basics about this game. I offered a few hints on how to make this multiplayer mafia game run smoothly. You can read my other articles for more hints and tips on Mafia Wars. If you have ever played a mafia game you should already know the in's and out's of proper play procedure. If not, it is not hard to learn. There are a few guides out there that are great to learn how to dominate the game, however there are a lot out there that are not so great. Make sure you pick guides from those who have learned from the best and prove that they have high rankings in Mafia Wars, otherwise you will be paying just to see fillers of information such as how to set up a Facebook account, which I'm sure you already know. I wish you the best in your endeavors to master Mafia Wars.

Good Morning Friend

I've got an extra special treat to compliment your daily dose of morning O.J and mastering this little step, I'm about to share, is sure to leave you with a business that generates more leads and more sales than you know what to do with. Now contrary to belief, not too many marketers follow this step, which is extremely stupid, but hey that just means we have an advantage over the competition that's right this golden nugget I'm about to share allowed me to increase conversions of my funnel by 68% and has helped many of my students achieve similar results, that's how powerful this process is when driving traffic to your website/landing page/sales page. the idea is to get as many people to complete your call-to-action (CTA) as possible, because ultimately this will help you make more money (which is the name of the game) now to fully understand this approach this may require you to adopt a new mindset to fully prosper from this content, because you need to know that regardless of how good or bad your results are, it could always be better... whether you're making $5 a day or $5,000 a day.

So with this in mind, we're always able to improve our website/lead pages etc and often our lead flow and sales by making a few subtle changes such as headlines, button copy, button size,button shape, page layout (you get the idea).

Now although these changes might not seem like much on the surface, they have a powerful effect on the human mind at a subliminal level (in other words, people's decisions can be influenced without them knowing).

The big question now is... how do you know which changes work best?

... and the answer is simple, you'll need to A/B Split TEST

That's right, this masterful technique could double, triple and even quadruple your business, all you need to do is:

1) Create a page

2) Duplicate the page

3) Make one change to the duplicate page(headline, colours, copy)

4) Send an equal amount of traffic to both

5) Keep the winner and ditch the loser

6) Change another element and repeat the process

That is how simple this is and if you want to become the authority in your niche whilst building out a 6 figure empire, then this stuff is crucial because regardless of how good you think your page is, ultimately your audience will be the judge. So whenever you create a new campaign, be sure to test everything, otherwise you could be leaving piles of extra cash on the table and although there is pgslot no guarantee that each change will be better than the last, you can't know until you test.

This concludes today's marketing lesson, I encourage you to not only read this content but actually implement this to your future campaigns.

Until next time,

Ezekiel S Marshall

[gabbiani-ipotetici]

You might be wondering, what does the tag's name mean? Why did I choose it? What is this all about?

Ora e sempre, Resistenza (now and forever, Resistance) is a motto you can hear used often by (usually leftist) people who oppose Fascism, right-wing government/politics, etc. It has become a kind of “catch-all” slogan, sometimes misused or overused, and sometimes those who use it don’t know where it comes from.

It’s from an incisive poem, Lapide ad ignomia (Monument/tombstone to ignominy), by Pietro Calamandrei. The poem is also known as “L’avrai, camerata Kesselring…” (You will get it, camerata Kesselring…), from its first verse.

Kesselring’s biography is extensive and I can’t possibly summarize it here (Wiki has a thorough page here https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Albert_Kesselring), but you have to know that he is THE German we Italians learnt to hate and despise. He was in charge of Italy’s defence during the Allied advance, planned many attacks against Resistance forces, and he personally issued orders for some of the worse civilian killings our country suffered (like Marzabotto and Sant’Anna di Stazzema, among others). Oh, and he used the local Jewish people of Rome and Tunis as slave labour to fortify those cities’ defences. Truly, a lovable fellow.

His trial was in 1947, he was found guilty of war crimes and sentenced to death by firing squad. Many UK politicians and military leaders (including Churchill) petitioned for his sentence to be converted to life imprisonment, then in 1948 his sentence was shortened to 21 years, and he was released in 1952 due to health reasons (the UK government feared a media backfire if he died of illness while in jail). He died 8 years later, but not before becoming active again in politics. Those who defended him often cited his love for art and how he preserved Italian cities and architecture. It’s a pity he didn’t give a damn about the people who lived in the country he so claimed to love.

When he was released, he declared that he didn’t think of himself as guilty and that the Italian people should thank him and build him a monument for what he did in Italy.

Piero Calamandrei (you'll hear about him a couple other times, in this series), a politician, lawyer, and one of the founders of the Partito d’Azione  (a progressive, anti-fascist party that also directly took part in the Resistance) answered with this poem, copies of which exist as monuments in many locations where civilian mass murders ordered by Kesselring took place. Calamandrei published it on December 4th 1952, the 8th anniversary of the death of Duccio Galimberti, a very famous partisan that was tortured and killed in 1944.

My translation is way less poetic than the original, but I hope I managed to transmit a bit of the meaning of the poem, of what Ora e sempre Resistenza means.

Original text

Lo avrai

camerata Kesselring

il monumento che pretendi da noi italiani

ma con che pietra si costruirà

a deciderlo tocca a noi.

Non coi sassi affumicati

dei borghi inermi straziati dal tuo sterminio

non colla terra dei cimiteri

dove i nostri compagni giovinetti

riposano in serenità

non colla neve inviolata delle montagne

che per due inverni ti sfidarono

non colla primavera di queste valli

che ti videro fuggire.

Ma soltanto col silenzio del torturati

più duro d'ogni macigno

soltanto con la roccia di questo patto

giurato fra uomini liberi

che volontari si adunarono

per dignità e non per odio

decisi a riscattare

la vergogna e il terrore del mondo.

Su queste strade se vorrai tornare

ai nostri posti ci ritroverai

morti e vivi collo stesso impegno

popolo serrato intorno al monumento

che si chiama

ora e sempre

RESISTENZA

Translation

You will get it

camerata Kesselring

the monument you demand of us Italians

but it’s up to us to decide

the stone it will be built with.

Not with the charred stones

of the defenceless villages maimed by your exterminations

not with the ground of the graveyards

where our young comrades

rest in peace

not with the inviolate snow of the mountains

which defied you for two winters

nor with the spring of these valleys

which saw you run away.

But only with the silence of the tortured

harder than any stone

only with the rock of this pact

sworn among free men

who willingly gathered

led by dignity and not by hatred

determined to redeem

the shame and the dread of the world.

If you wish to return to these roads,

you will find us at our post

the dead and the living sharing the same commitment

one people closed around the monument

that is called

now and forever

RESISTANCE

#Ora e sempre resistenza #Italian history #Antifascismo #Pietro Calamandrei #Long post

[morinuwlguldbrandsen]

Changing Tire-Kickers Inside Mouse Clickers

You have many options on hand for nurturing the number of visitors to your site. These strategies come with a wide array of results and difficulty. I possess tried and tested most of them using a variety of approaches. This is an approach that actually works very well.

Previous to you sell something, INITIALLY... give a free of charge gift.

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Your concentrate should be to get and share valuable information. A terrific wealth of information is out there for the internet. A large number of tools can be found to get you usage of information that folks are seeking. These kind of subjects happen to be what people need to know and are people you want to use in what you offer to your targeted traffic.

There is a great deal of perceived benefit for you in case you provide the information you are presenting as a small course over 3-5 days' time. Making the effort to make a top-quality free product will help you quite definitely. to you several times over in the form of a very important list of quality subscribers. Little or no cash goes a long way in our project.

Offer the information but if your visitor only will provide their particular name and e-mail treat. The best way to perform this information take function is to use a 'squeeze page'. The squeeze page can easily be started starting with an elementary website.

You can obtain top-notch work done these days with little cost. It will be easier to have a superior quality squeeze page up and running in minutes that offers your free of charge information for the world.

If you would like to learn tips on how to get your own squeeze page promptly and for very reasonable prices, please get in touch. You can approach things to auto-pilot function starting with these strategits.

You can convert a subscriber list right into a long-term cash-machine with health care and interest. You can quickly proceed to a position in which the value of your efforts expands and becomes ever more satisfying to you and your list members.

Trying to help your customer base and striving to get of value to them are going to pay off in a business, on the web or off-line. Great returns can be joining your downline as you keep develop your home business. There's make sure give a thing free that lets you start before somebody at any time gets to your squeeze page. Facts in various forms has a excessive perceived-value for anyone who is in search of it. In the event you focus on top quality of information delivered in a professional manner you'll certainly be taking huge steps on the street you wish to travel around.

Remember that your online visitor there has to be because of a interest and a need for some simple information. Set their needs 1st and comprehend they did not really log on looking for an opportunity to mail some cash your method. You have to defeat an always-present barrier of doubt within your visitor's head. Provide ios auto clicker and you will promptly erode the doubts. Beneficial articles can be widely released and used. They are an effective way of building reliability and trust on the part of you. A quick search of some key-word tools might reveal to you the topics of curiosity and will need of large categories of people.

This article should educate, educate as well as enthuse you, but must not sell a little something. Keep your content articles focused on everything you have learned the reader wants to know. Save the sales procedure for later. It's much better that you should give them wonderful information initially and main. You then add a relatively quick sentence or two at the end, near your unsecured personal. This where you indicate you are the owner of a web-site where they will learn more about the topic.

Document production lately can be manufactured much easier with new software package available that creates reports quickly because quantity. It merges obstructs of text, uses a 32, 000 word thesaurus and manges data bases, on top of that. Everything has gotten much easier lately using this. Articles can be drafted, produced and distributed to thousands of people found at very reasonable premiums.

#website

[enby-hawke]

People in my discord convinced me that it’s ok to start drawing my script so I’ll be drawing page 1 tomorrow. I’ve been also brainstorming cover pages so I’ll probably start on those, too.

#Tomorrow is technically a rest day for me #but I'm so fucking excited to start drawing #I want to get enough pages together that I can release on a schedule though #I'll probably need several covers when I'm done cause 228 pages and still writing lol #but still #I wonder how many pages I should build up before I release

[my-soul-sings]

kiss the girl: ch 5

Fandom: Tears of Themis Characters: Artem x Reader

Summary: Armed with a trusty book, Artem Wing attempts to win the woman of his dreams.

ch 1 | ch 2 | ch 2 extra (ft. marius) | ch 3 | ch 4 | ch 5

***

“Surprise him with flowers.”

It all began one morning, when you went to Artem’s office to look for a case file, and stumbled across a certain incriminating book that was hiding in his drawer.

The title said it all: “The Psychology of Love”. The contents of the book were even more damning—flipping it open took you naturally to the page where a plain black bookmark had been inserted, and you found yourself reading a chapter about practical tips for wooing a woman.

As you read the book, you’d periodically look over your shoulder every now and then in case Artem arrived and caught you red-handed (although you were technically only going through his drawer because you were looking for a case file that he had told you to find in his office).

You immediately recognised the practical pointers as the things Artem had been putting into practice lately. The flowers, the compliments, the dinner… What you’d initially thought was odd behaviour on his part suddenly all made sense, and it basically confirmed your suspicions that perhaps your boss did have feelings for you, and that yours weren’t one-sided like you had thought after all.

The revelation had your cheeks warming and your lips spreading into a huge grin. All that had to be done now was for both of you to confess and then you’d officially start dating, just as you had hoped for a while now.

The next question then was how to go about doing it. You considered asking him about the book directly, but that wouldn’t be any fun at all. Sure, you might get a laugh out of seeing Artem’s ears turn red and his words coming out in a timid stutter, but you wanted to be more creative with this.

And as you scanned through the book, a brilliant plan began to formulate in your mind. One that had your smile turning from gleeful, innocent and warm, to something a little more wicked. Just a little.

With all that Artem had been doing for you lately, naturally, it was only right that you returned the favour.

***

Artem’s morning routine hasn’t changed much as far as he can remember. In the mornings, he makes breakfast, a cup of coffee, then drives to work and enters the office building. He’ll greet his colleagues who are already all set up in the office and doing their work or rushing some prep work before going to court, and then settle down in his room to check his emails.

It’s not a particularly exciting routine, but Artem has gotten used to his life as a working adult; more routines, less surprises and spontaneity.

That’s why Artem isn’t used to being surprised, or having to figure out at 10am why his colleagues keep staring at him or greeting him with vaguely suspicious smiles on their faces. With every step he takes through the office he can feel their eyes on him, like visitors eyeing an animal in a zoo exhibit.

Artem wonders if it’s something about his appearance, but he’s wearing the same thing he usually does, and he has combed his hair like always. Besides, he also subtly checked to make sure his zipper wasn’t down when he first noticed his colleagues acting strange, so that can’t be it either.

His mind runs through the many possibilities for his colleagues’ strange behaviours, but can’t think of a reasonable explanation.

Thankfully, he doesn't need to think for long. He finds that explanation placed conspicuously in the centre of his desk, which is usually left clean and neat when he leaves the office for the night.

Artem is so stunned he doesn’t even realise that someone has knocked on his door until he feels a tap on his shoulder and hears a stifled laugh coming from his left.

“Everyone’s been going crazy since the flowers came. Did you send a bouquet of roses to yourself?” Celestine asks between giggles. Artem doesn’t blame her—the sight is quite incriminating. He can’t think of anyone who would send him flowers when there is no occasion to celebrate anything. Not to mention, roses? That’s quite the choice of flowers for someone who is single…

“Did you do this?” Artem asks, turning to her, although even he thinks the accusation is absurd.

“Me? Of course not. Do you know how expensive flowers are? I’d only spend it on my darling—”

“Enough,” he interrupts her, pinching the bridge of his nose and releasing a vexed sigh. First things first, he needs to do something about the flowers before more people see and start gossiping about him.

“You don’t look so happy for someone who just received flowers,” Celestine says, watching as he places his things down on his chair and desk before moving to inspect the gift. He’s eyeing it about as warily as one might a ticking bomb.

“Is it a secret admirer? Or— Don’t tell me, you’ve been making moves on someone else?”

“Of course not,” he hushes her, casting a wary glance towards the window of his office, in case they’re overheard by mistake. She’s not at her desk, and the anxious beating of his heart calms down slightly when he realises she probably hasn’t arrived in the office yet. That gives him some time to dispose of the evidence.

Turning to Celestine, he says in a low voice, “Don’t be so loud. I don’t want her to get the wrong idea.”

Celestine rolls her eyes, folding her arms. “She already saw the flowers.”

“What?” Alarmed, he looks out the window again, but there’s no one at her desk.

“She just dropped her things off on her chair and rushed to the restroom,” Celestine explains in a dismissive tone that does nothing to quell Artem’s concerns.

She’s seen the flowers. She’s going to think that he’s been flirting with someone else, or that he sent flowers to himself. Either way, it doesn’t look good.

“You look like you’ve just seen a ghost,” Celestine remarks, scrutinising his expression. He supposes he does. How else should he look? Festive, now that he might have lost his chance at wooing the woman he’s had a crush on for so long?

“Get a grip, Artem. First things first, who are the flowers from?”

Right, right. He should confirm that first. There’s a small card sticking out from the side of the bouquet, and he fishes it out, reading it while keeping it out of view from the curious eyes of Celestine. She immediately fires off protests in response, but he’s taller than her and is able to keep it out of her reach by extending his arm all the way up.

I wasn’t sure what flowers you’d like, so I went with roses, because… well. You should be able to guess why. I’ll see you soon.

It’s a message straight out of a horror movie. Artem doesn’t want to see this person. He doesn’t want anyone to see him with this person, for that matter. He would be ruined beyond repair.

Unfortunately, the card isn’t signed. Not on the front or back, and there’s no other card to be found in the bouquet. So now, he has to deal with a mystery admirer who seems to know where he works or lives. Maybe both.

He briefly contemplates getting a personal protection order but immediately dismisses the thought; there’s no way. It seems his only option left is to wait for this secret admirer (or prankster; he still has his doubts) to track him down.

“Hey! I wanted to read that!” Celestine grumbles when the note is crushed in Artem’s fist and stuffed into his pocket.

“Read something else. You just told me yesterday that you’re drowning in work.”

Not sure where else he can put the bouquet, he decides to put it on the floor, in a corner of his room so it’s less conspicuous to anyone who passes by.

“From how you’re still panicking, I’m guessing the flowers weren’t from her after all?” Celestine asks, clicking her tongue.

“You thought they were from her?”

“Yeah. She saw the flowers in your office this morning and walked away looking quite happy.”

“Oh.” That’s strange, he thought she would be mad. But if she’s happy, that can mean only one of two things: either the flowers were from her, or she’s happy thinking that he has a partner now.

It looks like he’ll be playing a tedious guessing game for the rest of the day and the next couple of sleepless nights.

“I could ask her if you want?” Celestine offers, being helpful for the first time since entering his office.

“That won’t be necessary. I’ll handle it,” he replies, clearing his throat and sitting down. He’s wasted enough time on this—he’ll worry about it after work.

Celestine takes that as her cue to leave, and this time, she graciously doesn’t leave a mocking remark behind when she closes the door.

continue reading on AO3 (see replies to this post) 

#artem wing #tears of themis #artem wing fanfiction #tears of themis artem #tears of themis fanfiction #tears of themis fanfic #artem fanfiction #artem fanfic #kiss the girl #my writing #sorry folks i'm linking to AO3 because this chapter is fairly long and im too lazy to copy+paste and comb through the text to #manually add italics #so pls read it on ao3 i will love u hehe

[cheri-translates]

[CN] Victor’s Belonging Date

🍒 Warning: This post contains detailed spoilers for a date, 归属之约, which has not been released in English servers! 🍒

This date makes important references to his birthday R&S, so do read that first!

Victor’s 2021 birthday collection:

🐼 r&s l belonging date ♡ l video call l moments and texts l asmr

[ Released in CN on 8 Jan 2021 ]

Early in the morning on the weekend, I push a cardboard box into Victor’s living room, straightening up and heaving a sigh.

MC: I seem to have prepared too many ribbons... I'll just blow fewer balloons.

Scanning the slightly empty and spacious room, I retrieve decorations from within the cardboard box.

Victor has been busy with business trips recently. Even though I know he’d return on his birthday, I still feel a little uneasy.

In order to avert the abrupt circumstances like last year, I called him in advance to tell him about my “action plan”.

He seems to have gotten used to the festive rituals I insist upon, and has agreed to let me decorate his home. 

Just as I plan to straighten up the cushions on the sofa, the doorbell suddenly rings. 

MC: Who is it?

??: Hello, there’s a package for Mr Victor.

I open the door, and the deliveryman hands over a cardboard box. The logo of Loveland City’s zoo is printed on it. 

MC: This is...

Deliveryman: It was sent late, I’m really sorry about it! There’s been some issues at the transfer point. It should have been sent to you at the start of the year.

A little puzzled, I nod and take the box. This seems to be the first time I’m seeing a package from the zoo.

After signing for the package, I take a picture of the box and send it to Victor. 

Not long after, the phone buzzes.

Victor: Leave the box at the entrance. I’ll handle it after I’m back. 

MC: Sure, but why would the zoo send you a delivery?

Victor: I adopted a panda, so the zoo sends some merchandise every year.

MC: So they actually send such things... zoo merchandise is always in limited supply, and I’ve had to rely on snatching them up whenever I visit.

Perhaps hearing the envy in my tone, Victor chuckles softly. 

Victor: In that case, you can open it up and look if there’s anything you haven’t snatched up.

MC: Can I? I’ll open it on your behalf then!

With a few movements, I open the cardboard box. All sorts of animal plush toys are stored inside, with panda-related items featuring most often.

My line of sight roams the box, and I notice a small album.

There are pictures of one big and one small panda in the album. It records their everyday lives - eating bamboo, climbing trees, rolling around... it’s like a diary.

MC: Victor, there’s an album here too. There are two pandas in it. Which one did you adopt?

Victor: Both of them.

MC: You adopted two?

Victor: Mm, the big one was the one I mentioned to you before. The small one is its child.

Digesting this information, I mutter softly.

MC: I wonder who mentioned not having feelings towards animals...

Victor: Animals no, people yes. Providing help to endangered animals is a very normal thing.

MC: Only providing help?

Victor: ...what else?

MC: Nothing, I just think CEO Victor is really considerate to specially provide help to a father-son duo~

There’s a temporary silence at the other end of the line. I can almost picture Victor’s speechless expression at this moment. 

Victor: Say it, what kind of wicked plan have you come up with this time?

MC: It’s a serious idea! Victor, let’s find a time to visit them? I also wish to meet these two “investees” who have caught your eye.

Victor: You’re truly giving yourself more and more excuses to go out to play.

MC: I can’t?

Victor: ...forget it, we’ll go together if you want to see them.

After ending the call, I retrieve a few panda plush toys from the box, display them on the sofa, then straighten the seats. Finally, I nod in satisfaction. 

As compared to vibrantly coloured decorations, Victor should prefer these adorable plush toys.

-

A few more pages are torn from the calendar, and it’s finally Victor’s birthday.

I checked the information of his flight beforehand. Since it’s not yet time for the plane to land, I prepare to send my report to him first.

The sound of my phone vibrating enters my ears. Seeing the familiar name flashing on the screen, I pick up the call in slight confusion.

MC: Victor? You’ve already reached?

Victor: I just reached. Slightly earlier than expected. 

MC: This means I'm the first person to receive your call~ I’ll just say it first - I’ve already prepared my report, and just have to tap the send button.

Victor: Looks like you have a lot of confidence in this report. Since you're done with work, head out with me in the afternoon.

I freeze for a moment. This year, Victor’s birthday happens to be on a working day. I originally planned to celebrate with him in the evening after work.

I didn’t expect that Victor, who has always been serious about work, would think of having a day of rest. I can’t help but tease him.

MC: Is CEO Victor skipping work? 

Victor: I’m giving you a break too. A certain someone has been rushing work for so many days, and I’m letting you rest for a while.

My heart stirs, and I seem to understand something.

MC: Seems like I'm not the only person looking forward to today?

After a moment of silence on the other end of the line, his voice sounds, carrying with it a smile. 

Victor: I shouldn’t be the only one wanting to meet earlier either. I’ll get my luggage, and will see you in around two hours.

-

At the agreed time, Victor’s car appears punctually at the bottom of the office building.

I jog and get into the car. He sits on the driver’s seat quietly, his coat half open, revealing a somewhat familiar grey coloured shirt.

There seems to be some tiny creases at his collar that haven’t been ironed smoothly, but the angle at which the collar encases his neck looks very suitable.

Perhaps due to the rays of light falling on his shoulders, or perhaps due to the warm wind blowing in the car, the image before me feels especially warm despite it being winter.

I pull on his arm to take a look, then nod in satisfaction.

MC: Who picked this shirt? It feels as though it makes CEO Victor look especially dashing!

Victor looks at me, the corners of his lips tugging upwards.

Victor: Blowing your own trumpet.

MC: You wore it yourself. Doesn’t this prove that the choice of gift was a success?

Victor: I wonder who splayed it on the middle of the bed, only missing a note saying “Wear this today”.

MC: So do you like it or not?

Victor: Passable.

I purse my lips, pulling aside my own coat. Deliberately straightening up, I beckon him to look at the matching shirt I’m wearing.

MC: Cough cough. Is it really just “passable”?

Victor seems to be taken aback for a moment. Then, a smile quickly softens his expression.

Victor: The car isn’t warm yet. Don’t rush to remove your coat.

He reaches out to pull up the zipper. With a pause, he pulls it down slightly, stopping at the chest region.

I follow his gaze and lower my head to take a look. Like this, it just happens to reveal my shirt.

Glancing at our similar colours, I can’t help but laugh secretly in my heart.

Victor: In general, there’s an improvement in taste. A little better than what I expected.

MC: Thank you for your praise, CEO Victor. In that case, should I maintain this standard in the future?

Victor: You can. All right, let’s go. Fasten your safety belt.

MC: Where are we going?

Victor: Didn’t you want to see the pandas? There will be fewer visitors in the zoo on a working day.

While Victor speaks, he starts the car, inputting the destination into the navigation system.

MC: We’re going right now? But today... I thought you’d prefer a quieter birthday.

Victor: By “quieter”, do you mean by displaying a huge bunch of plush toys at home?

MC: They’re so cute, so I accidentally...

I grin while meeting his look of distaste, and something occurs to me.

MC: But if we're going there today, I could get to know your panda friends by matching them against the photographs.

Seeing me take out the photo album from my bag and giving it a flip, Victor raises his brows in slight shock.

Victor: You even brought their photographs around?

MC: I was originally going to make you a mini photo wall, but couldn’t finish it in time. I planned to bring you the photographs in the evening, so I put them in my bag. Come to think of it, I don’t know what names you gave them.

[Note] This is a contradiction?? Because MC clearly mentioned Little Vick in a pretty old Moment post...

Victor: I didn’t give them names.

MC: Why not?

Victor: I only paid the adoption fees. The rest depends entirely on the zoo staff’s care, so there’s no need to leave them with anything.

MC: But if they don’t have names, how would you recognise them later?

Victor: Do you rely on names to recognise people?

MC: Oo... It’s mainly the face I guess.

Victor: Animals are the same. If you observe their unique traits, you’ll naturally be able to identify them.

The afternoon sunlight is somewhat glaring. I lift my head to avoid the light, and look at Victor in the rearview mirror.

He has a serious expression, but for some reason, I think of a particular fine and sunny weekend we once had, when the light also encased us like this. 

At that time, the person beside me had used an ink-less brush, secretly leaving a mark related to him on me.

The car pauses at the crossing, waiting for the red light. Victor straightens the visor for me, turning his head to meet my gaze. 

Victor: Why are you staring at me?

MC: I suddenly thought about how someone doesn’t name pandas, yet would write his own name on my face. Doesn’t this mean I’m important to him?

Victor: Good that you know it.

The red light flickers. Victor averts his gaze, staring at the front. Suddenly, he laughs.

Victor: But from what I see now, I’ve already been influenced by a dummy.

The visor shields me from the glaring sunlight, and also makes my vision clearer.

Whether it’s the matching shirt or the Shiba Inu keychain swinging on the car keys...

These seemingly trivial, ordinary and small details clearly reflect the traces that I’ve left on him.

-

Even though it’s a working day, there are still quite a number of people visiting the pandas in the zoo.

Following the crowd, we take a slow stroll. Many children run past us happily.

Right after walking to the panda area, I see many people congregated at the railings and observing.

Pulling Victor over, rounded panda “dumplings” immediately attract my full attention.

A few young pandas are currently climbing and having fun on wooden poles. Occasionally, they’d bump into each other and roll onto the ground. After exerting energy to flip over, they’d once again climb to the location of their choice.

As if intoxicated and stupefied, I stare at them for a very long time before remembering that the panda baby Victor had adopted could be in their midst. Hurriedly, I take out the photographs from my bag to make comparisons.

However, the pandas before me seem to be carved from the same mold. The colour of their fur are the same, and they are similar in size. There seems to be too much to take in.

I turn my head to look at Victor, who’s next to me. He seems to guess what I’m thinking, and speaks straight away.

Victor: You haven’t identified it?

MC: It’s a little difficult.

Victor points at a panda which is currently climbing a wooden pole.

Victor: That one.

MC: How can you be so certain?

Victor: It injured its leg a few months ago. During the treatment, there was a need to trim the fur around the injury. Look at its hind leg - some of its fur is newly grown.

Fixing my eyes on it, the back of the panda’s right hind leg has a small tuft of relatively shorter fur. Without a careful look, one would think it’s a normal dip.

Flipping and looking through the photos, I realise that it’s actually the case.

Just as I’m about to awe at how Victor is truly perceptive to the finest detail, I suddenly realise something. 

MC: Wait, you mentioned that it’s been a few months... Have you always been keeping watch on them?

Victor: The staff will regularly provide feedback on their situation.

MC: So your e-mail isn’t filled only with reports from employees.

Victor: My life doesn’t just consist of work.

He doesn’t respond to my teasing gaze, and he continues looking at the pandas playing freely and leisurely in the garden.

Victor: Are you here to look at the pandas or me?

I respond without giving it much thought.

MC: Both!

Victor: ...

Victor shakes his head in resignation, pulling on my hand as we weave through the crowd.

Victor: There are too many people here. Let’s walk forward.

We walk and pause, following the park’s signboards. Gradually, a patch of empty land appears in my view.

A staff member is currently stacking bamboo next to tree trunks and wooden poles, as though waiting for the pandas to feast.

I tug on Victor to stop. After staying in place for a while, I see a big panda pacing over slowly.

It doesn’t seem to care about how many people are watching it. It heads towards the food, picking a comfortable position to sit down.

Flipping to the photograph of the Daddy Panda eating bamboo, I lift it up to compare it with the panda in front of me.

MC: Victor, isn’t this the panda Uncle gave to you? Its posture of leaning against the tree trunk is exactly the same as in the photo!

Victor leans down and looks over, nodding lightly.

Victor: Yes.

MC: Really? We’re so lucky to meet both of them.

Just as Victor is about to say something, the voice of a small boy suddenly drifts towards us.

Small boy: Little... Vick. Its name is Little Vick!

I’m stunned for a moment, turning my head to find the source of the voice. A small boy is being carried in the arms of his parents, reading out the name based on a nearby board.

Information regarding the pandas on duty are written on the board. Its name is found at the very top, and it’s a name I couldn’t be more familiar with.

[Note] The reason why MC finds it familiar is clearer in Chinese. Victor’s name is 李泽言 (Li Ze Yan),  and the panda’s Chinese name is 言言 (Yan Yan)

Because he read the correct words, the small boy is complimented by his parents. He continues reading.

Small boy: Its a boy... and its birthday is 13 January! It’s Little Vick’s birthday today!

Turning back to look at Victor, he currently has an uncomfortable expression on his face, and he clears his throat softly.

Victor: ...my dad named it.

MC: And it happens to have the same birthday?

Victor: Mm.

I try to suppress my laughter, lowering my voice and calling out to Little Vick a few times while it’s engrossed in bamboo.

MC: Little Vick-- We’re here to see you--

Victor: [sighs] ...

MC: Little Vick-- Wishing you a happy birthday--

Victor: Childish.

Victor pretends to have a stern look his poker face, but I can still see the gradually reddening tips of his ears.

I laugh while standing in front of him, straightening my back under his reluctant gaze.

MC: On behalf of myself and Little Vick, we also wish Mr Victor a happy birthday. Don’t feel embarrassed. Your father used your name to name your favourite thing. It’s called “loving the house and its crows”. 

[Note] MC uses an idiom, 爱屋及乌 ( “ai wu ji wu”), which literally translates to “love the house and the crows”. This conveys the depth of someone’s love to the point where you like everything related to that person.

Victor: Do you apply the same principle when you enthusiastically name all sorts of objects?

MC: I don’t just name everything. After all, I also “love the house and its crows”. For instance, I used to think that all pandas were very adorable... But right now, I think Little Vick is the cutest.

Only after saying all this in one breath do I feel slightly embarrassed. I hurriedly turn around, taking out my phone to take pictures of Little Vick, wanting to hide the heat on my face. 

While snapping photos, I watch for Victor’s reaction. But even after a long time, there isn’t a sound from behind me, and I can’t help but turn around.

“Kacha.”

The golden, dazzling sunlight spreads from behind him, glinting brightly around his raised phone.

Before I can prepare my expression, I see Victor’s phone camera facing me.

He retracts his phone, smiling as he looks at the screen.

MC: [blushing] You... you snuck a photo of me!

Seeing that I’m reaching out to snatch his phone, Victor grabs my wrist, quickly keeping his phone in his pocket.

Victor: This is just a response to your words earlier.

MC: What does that mean?

Victor smiles, his deep eyes filled with my profile.

Victor: It means that there are many dummies in the world... But I only like the one in front of me.

-

Returning home from the zoo, VIctor’s sudden words repeatedly circle my mind.

In order for him not to realise my state of mind, I take out the ingredients I had prepared in advance the moment I reach home, preparing to burrow into the kitchen to cook.

Victor naturally walks to my side, wanting to take the bags in my hand. I frantically press down on his hand.

MC: Hold on, don’t help. I’ll do it myself!

Victor: There are so many things and you want to do it yourself?

MC: Don’t worry, I’ve practiced at home and can guarantee that I have a knowledge of the fundamentals, and won’t blow up your kitchen. Also, you’re the elderly person whose birthday is being celebrated. So you shouldn’t work. Oh yes, aside from this shirt, I’ve also hidden a few presents at home. Want to look for them? 

[Note] MC REALLY USED THE WORD 寿星 ( “shou xing”) which could mean “God of Longevity” or “elderly person whose birthday is being celebrated” LOL

I say everything in one breath, not giving him a chance to retort.

Under my expectant gaze, Victor sighs in resignation, then says a few more words before leaving the kitchen.

-

With the fastest speed I can manage, I finish cooking. While bringing the dishes to the table, Victor places some gift boxes onto the sofa.

Victor: I’ve found three. That’s all, isn’t it?

MC: Not just these. You could look in other rooms.

Victor: [sighs] Looks like you really planned to prepare a hundred gifts.

MC: I didn’t do it on purpose. When I saw those things, I subconsciously  thought of you. But right now, I should invite CEO Victor to test my culinary skills!

After the meal, Victor finds a few more gifts. After giving them a count, I realise there’s still one more missing.

Victor: Why are there more?

MC: The final gift is very critical. I’ll help you get it.

I head straight to Victor’s bedroom. Removing the blanket, I retrieve a long box from a crevice at the corner of the bed.

Victor has his arms crossed over his chest as he stands at the side, watching as I make a show of straightening the ribbon on the gift box.

MC: Don’t worry, there aren’t any weird presents this time. Before, I was always sending you things I liked, but those things weren’t what you liked. So this year, I want to give you some gifts that you need.

Opening the gift box, I take out the tie that I picked out, and display it from all angles. 

MC: There aren’t pictures of happy faces, and it doesn’t have a strange colour. You can wear it to work!

Victor looks at me, then walks to the side of the bed and leans down.

Victor: Since a certain someone is doing her utmost to recommend it, I shall see how it looks. 

MC: I’ll put it on for you!

It’s rare for Victor to be interested in my presents. I immediately climb up from the bed, flipping his collar up and fastening the tie.

This distance makes the side of his face close enough to touch. His warm breaths are on my shoulder, and I have to force myself to focus on the tie.

With much difficulty, I tie the tie into a basic shape. Victor’s low voice suddenly drifts to my ear. 

Victor: This seems to be the first time I’m seeing you wear a proper shirt.

MC: It looks good, doesn’t it?

Victor doesn’t respond. He simply smiles, tidying the back of my collar.

Victor: It’s also the first time I’ve seen you cooking without being clumsy.

MC: Of course I needed to perform properly when cooking in your kitchen. 

Victor: It’s also the first time we’re visiting the zoo on a day-off from work.

MC: It’s already the fourth year, and there are still so many firsts?

Victor: Is that a bad thing? Since they are all first times, you can create so-called surprises.

The words at my ear, bringing with them a smile, create ripples in my heart. My hands pause, and I lift my head to look at him.

MC: May I ask CEO Victor - does this mean you’re satisfied with today?

Victor: This isn’t about whether I’m satisfied.

Victor pulls down my hand which is holding onto the tie, beckoning me to sit down.

Just as I plan to scoot over to give him some space, I realise that he has seated down directly on the carpet next to the bed.

MC: Someone always reminds me that the floor is cold. So why is he still sitting on the floor?

Victor: The first time you came to my house, you seem to have said similar words.

While speaking, he tugs the blanket upwards before it slides down my shoulder.

Lowering my head to look at him, the “first time” he’s referring to surfaces in my mind.

The CEO who wilfully lay down on the floor to settle work, and also wilfully had a light sleep in the middle of the piano tune.

He lifts his head to look at me, his teasing gaze unconcealed and bright in the light. The tie, which hasn’t been fastened properly, hangs loosely on his neck.

Without even realising it, his relaxed appearance has become something I've grown used to.

Images in my memories and the person before me gradually match up. I can’t suppress the smile creeping onto my lips, but complain about him anyway.

MC: Victor, you’re really wilful sometimes.

Victor: I learnt it from someone.

MC: ...cough cough. Back to the earlier topic! Could the elderly birthday person please assess today’s plans, and let me gain some experience.

Victor: Everything about today, whether the itinerary or the gifts - I’m very happy with them. Not just today. Every year before this as well.

MC: If you put it that way, I can’t tell how to make it even better. After all, even though it’s been so long, you’ve never directly mentioned what you like.

Victor chuckles softly.

Victor: There’s no need to mention them. When it comes to these things, your efforts always surpass my expectations. Also, the feelings and time you expend - they are even more precious gifts than anything else.

A clamour of emotions ferment in my chest, and I finally peek my head out from the blanket.

MC: Am I one step closer to moving you to tears?

Victor: Judging from your skills in tying a tie, you’re still very far from it. But this is already very good.

As the curtain of night falls, the world outside the window gradually becomes quiet. The ticking of the clock’s secondhand at the bedside becomes clearer.

I glance at the time, and it’s already quite late. 

MC: Today’s coming to an end. I’m a little reluctant to part with with it.

Victor: Reluctant to part with the off-day?

MC: Nope. I just feel as though you’ll get busy again after today... You won’t just be my Victor.

I mutter softly, but Victor still hears it. He curls his finger and taps my forehead.

Victor: Who says I'm not? From work to life, which part lacks a certain person’s shadow? Also, other than you, I've never belonged to anyone.

MC: Does this count as a return gift from an elderly man celebrating his birthday?

Victor: It’s just the truth.

I smile while tightening the blanket over myself, shuffling towards him quietly.

MC: But the opportunities to spend time with you without any worries like this are very limited. How do you want to spend the remainder of today?

Victor looks at me, then straightens up to sit with me at the side of the bed.

Victor: For the rest of the time, let’s just stay like this.

I subconsciously loosen my grip on the blanket. He takes the blanket, leans closer to me, and bundles me in it tightly.

The irritating sound of the secondhand suddenly vanishes. In the tranquil night, only the light in the eyes of the person next to me continues flowing and glinting.

Victor: Being without any worries like you wanted - it can be prolonged a little. Also, not just today. Anytime in the future - as long as you want it, it can be done.

🐼 Phone call: here

🐼 Support the cafe by dropping by the tip jar!

#mlqc #mlqc cn #mlqc spoilers #mlqc victor #C R Y I N G #THEY ARE SO CUTE

[oneyeartoparty]

I’ve been reading ur post and I just wanna request the brothers reacting to MC being fully able to fight back and win against belpie but didn’t in fear of hurting him? Probably knowing he would be a strong opponent too sorry if it’s too much😅

Hi! Its not too much at all. I hope you enjoy and thank you for the request =D

This contains: Mentions of violence, injury, being attacked, being trapped & death. Also has spoilers for Chapter 16.

Lucifer

Lucifer felt a feeling of dread, something quite rare for him, build up within him when he saw you and a floating Belphie in his demon form wrapped in chains appear before them on the staircase.

He was keenly aware of how much danger Belphie was in, and how he didn’t understand the situation at all. He was too preoccupied with attempting to free himself and hurl obscenities at anyone in range to notice he was close to being crushed.

Not wanting to see his youngest brother meet a grisly demise, he starts trying to calm you down and ensure you won’t harm Belphie.

When Lucifer learns Belphie tried to murder you, he becomes visibly angry. He might not show it outwardly often, but he has grown fond of you during your time in the Devildom, and losing you because he failed to safeguard you, from one of his brothers no less, would’ve incredibly upsetting for him.

Before Diavolo and Barbatos arrive, he’s able to convince you to slightly loosen the chains wrapped around his sibling, something he would secretly be proud of given the circumstances and your ruthlessness when it comes to defending yourself from unruly demons.

Once the truth of the situation is revealed, and everything has calmed down, and in Belphie’s case, been freed, Lucifer takes it upon himself to ensure you’re feeling ok after the incident and ensuring you get any support you need. He realises your happiness is important to him, and he’ll do whatever he can to make sure he can see your smile every day.

Mammon

When you descended the stairs with a little calf on a lead trotting behind you, Mammon was, like his brothers, incredibly confused. Where did you get that calf and how did it even get down into the Devildom in the first place?

It took him a few moments to recognize the cowhide had a pattern identical to the pillow Belphie always carried around. Had you used your magic to turn Belphie into the calf?

Of course, his human would be able to easily do something like this to one of the most powerful demons in existence. How could you not? He knew you were skilled and powerful enough to pull this off. It was hilarious when he thought about it. How frustrated must Belphie to have been turned into a helpless little calf?

But then he realised why you would’ve had to have done something like this. He knew Belphie hated humans, he was certainly capable and willing to kill one. That was the reason you had turned him, wasn’t it?

Mammon has rarely felt as much rage toward one of his brothers as he felt at that moment. Had you not been so skilled at magic, you could’ve been injured, or more likely, killed by Belphie. He was close to launching himself at his defenseless sibling when Diavolo and Barbatos burst in and revealed everything.

From many months after the incident, Mammon would keep a closer eye on you. He wanted to be there to protect you if something like this happened again. He wanted to be the one you could rely on and who could keep you safe.

Leviathan

Leviathan would never admit it, even well after the incident, but the sight of his youngest brother turned into a cardboard cut-out was hysterical to him.

The angry look on his brothers temporarily cardboard face as you tossed him from the top of the stairs and watched him slowly floated down to the floor has always bought him joy even during his saddest times.

He was keenly aware that you wouldn’t have done this unless Belphie has done something to warrant it. Since you were a human, it didn’t take Levi long to surmise that was the case, the idea confirmed by his brother’s cardboard form being in demon form with a rage-filled look on his face.

Levi didn’t blame you at all for doing this. You’d defended yourself and done so in a way that only embarrassed Belphie. He knew you could’ve done far worse, and he was glad for your restraint, though he doubted Belphie realised just how lucky he was.

When Diavolo and Barbatos finally arrived and revealed the truth behind recent events (and along with the brothers, convinced you to turn Belphie back into his regular demonic self) Levi checked on you in his way. He was both upset and overjoyed by the mix of events on that day, so he tried his best to stick close to you and make sure you were safe and happy. He even sent a few compliments your way, which was rare in more public settings.

Levi did punish his younger brother in his way for his stupid actions. Whenever the three of you played together, he’d always do his best to ensure Belphie came last, though he didn’t need to try too hard since he was usually napping 5 minutes into any game.

Satan

Satan wasn’t sure what he was expected when he and his brothers arrived back at the House of Lamentation, the last thing they were expecting was the peace they encountered. Belphie wasn’t known to be destructive, but angry demons did have a habit of smashing things unnecessarily.

When you appeared on the stairs, a book gripped in one hand he was relieved. You were unharmed, though he saw visible annoyance and fear in your expression. He knew then that something had happened, and it wasn’t good.

You walked straight up to Lucifer and handed him the book, saying in no uncertain terms that you weren’t freeing Belphie until you were certain he wouldn’t try killing you again and received a massive and genuine apology from the demon in question.

Dumbfounded, Lucifer opened the book, and Satan quickly moved beside him to get a look. The inside was a children's book, specifically the story of Snow White. The story followed the usual plot, except walking along the pages, looking angry and in his demon form, was Belphie.

He was enraged by his predicament. He was helpless in the pages, able to walk amongst the pictures but unable to change anything. He could move between pages but was unable to escape.

Later in the day, once everything was explained and Belphie was freed (and has given a substantial apology) Satan would congratulate you on easily subduing his youngest brother with ease and acknowledge your abilities.

He also vowed you would never need to use your powers in such a manner again, and he would always be by your side to defend you and keep you safe.

Asmodeus

Asmodeus must admit that the snow globe you had trapped Belphie in was both an ingenious way to contain the enraged demon and a beautifully designed piece he would gladly own if it weren’t a temporary prison.

He has wondered why of all things you were carrying the snow globe when you approached the group of demons. This wondered turned to concern when he saw the annoyed look on your face.

Once you’d explained what happened with Belphie he immediately came to your side and gave you a check over. The fact that this happened at all was atrocious, not to mention it was caused by his own younger brother.

His brothers tried to convince you to release Belphie, but Asmo doesn’t think he should be released just yet. After his actions, he deserves some punishment. He even offers to keep the snow globe in his room. He’ll be a perfect guardian of the object. Plus, he had already planned the perfect setup for some Devilgram photos including the snow globe.

He couldn’t hide his disappointment when Lucifer shot the idea down with a stern glare in his direction.

Once the truth of the situation and the truth of your origins was revealed my Diavolo and Barbatos, and Belphie freed (though Asmo still thought he should’ve been kept in there for a little longer), Asmo spends his time doting on you.

He knew situations like this could stick with someone, and he didn’t want you to feel alone or unprotected (even though he knew you could look after yourself). He also gave Belphie an earful about how stupid he was and warned him to never do that again, or he’d been dealing with both of you.

Beelzebub

Beel wasn’t concerned when you approached them with a sleeping Belphie floating along behind you on a bed of pillows. He was used to seeing his twin napping in strange situations, so this wasn’t different.

This changed when you told the group of demon brothers that Belphie wouldn’t be waking up until you had assurances that he wouldn’t try to murder you like he had just moments before.

Beel’s concern was torn between you and Belphie. Humans were fragile, and even one as powerful as you could be hurt by a demon-like Belphie, so he understood why you defended yourself and weren’t relenting. But Belphie was still his twin, even though he was wrong, he didn't want him trapped in eternal sleep.

He checks on you first, making sure you’re unhurt. He tells you he is immensely hurt by Belphies actions and hopes it doesn’t permanently ruin your relationship with him or ruin the chance of you mending things with Belphie.

After that, while his brothers are checking on you, he looks over Belphie. He is unhurt, but he is deeply asleep, far more so than he usually is. He affectionally moves some of the hair covering Belphie’s face just as Diavolo and Barbatos enter the room and reveal everything.

Once everything settles down, Beel spends his time trying to mend the relationship between you and his twin, and make sure you’re doing well, both mentally and physically. You’re both his family, and he will do whatever he can to make sure you’re both safe and happy.

Belphegor

Belphie thought you were an easy mark when you first met. A gullible, stupid human who he could easily string along to earn both his freedom and destroy the Exchange Program.

It was this arrogance that leads to him ignoring you when you talked about being a powerful magic user. No doubt you were only an expert in sleight of hand party tricks and were simply trying to impress him.

Imagine his surprise when he tried attacking you but found himself trapped in a near-transparent bubble instead.

Even his most vicious and powerful attacks in his demon form were unable to penetrate or dent the sphere now surrounding him and this only served to increase his fury.

He was so focused on trying to escape he didn’t notice you taking him down to the house’s entryway where his brothers were gathered. Their argument below quickly turned into pleading for you not to hurt him and to please let him down gently.

You were adamant though. You wouldn’t hurt him, but you wouldn’t let him down until you knew he’d stop attacking you.

You would later explain to Belphie you weren’t lying and were indeed a powerful magic user. Your abilities were spotted by the Sorcerers’ Society at a young age, and they took you in and taught you all they know.

He’s both impressed by your skills and grateful that he was never close to hurting you. He vows to himself to never again hurt you and to support you forevermore to make up forever thinking of hurting you.

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me levi #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me asmo #asmo #obey me beelzebub #obey me beel #beel #obey me belphegor #obey me belphie #belphie #obey me gender neutral mc #shall we date mc #shall we date lucifer #shall we date mammon #shall we date leviathan #shall we date levi #shall we date satan #shall we date asmodeus #shall we date asmo #shall we date beelzebub #shall we date belphie #shall we date belphegor

[voltagesmutter]

Mystic Messenger: 707 - A naughty sleigh ride.

Fandom: Mystic Messenger Pairing: 707/Saeyoung x MC (F) Prompt: 2nd December - A naughty sleigh ride. From @voltage-vixen​ christmas list. Warning: Finger, Semi-public, References to Storyline.  Notes: For my raffle winner 5 @truth-be-told-im-lying​ - Thank you again for entering.

“Saeyoung… this has just been the most wonderful evening, thank you.” Pressing a delicate kiss to his cheek, her arm linked through his as they strolled out the doors of the restaurant. 

“Well don’t thank me yet!” A light blush on his cheek as he led her down the stairs. The air was chilly and night had fallen fast over the city, winter had settled in fast and Christmas was right around the corner. “Ta-Dah!” He sang, watching as her eyes widened with a childish smile plastered on her face. 

A horse drawn sleigh waiting on the side of the road, a driver dressed head to toe in black with a top sat waiting patiently for their arrival. A friendly smile and wave greeted them.

“I asked for their finest UFO,” Saeyoung extended his hand to help her into the carriage. Fairy lights in red and green began flashing around the sides making her laugh out, moving the thick blanket from the seats so they could sit. 

“Saeyoung, you didn’t need to do all this,” Her hand intertwined with his as he sat beside her, little proximity between them as they huddled for warmth. Her reference being to how much he protested he hated Christmas when he first met her due to how much more abusive his mother became during the festive season. 

“I wanted to, I know how much I used to hate this season. The family time, the gifts, the love. I never got it and because of that I didn’t understand it,” His hand pulled away from hers, instead wrapping it around her shoulder to pull her closer to him. Her head resting against his shoulder as he inhaled her scent. Apple shampoo. His favourite smell in the world, her smell, the smell of home, warmth and safety. The driver gave out a few commands, the sleigh moving forward as the sound of hooves clicked down the empty streets. “But now. You, you bring so much joy and love into my world, I want to experience it. The whole sha-blam!”.

“And sha-blam we shall!” She laughed, drawing the blanket up over their touching knees. “We’ll get a big tree and we can, oh! We can get UFO lights for it and- and… we get some baubles made! Maybe we could put a photo of Elly on one of them, imagine how mad but impressed Jumin would be,”. She continued on listing out things they could do, from carol singing to baking gingerbread, secret Santa with the others, late night cheesy Christmas movies with hot chocolate. And as she carried on all Saeyoung could do was watch down with the biggest grin, praying she could feel the rapid beating of his heart against his chest. Because it was for her it beated, she was the reason for his living and if he could he would physically give her his heart for her to hold in her hands and keep forever. His heart belonged solely to her.

The scenery changed from restaurants and buildings to the snow covered fields, the scenic route home. The white snow glistened beneath the stars and moon, the dark blue of the sky casting a shadow on the world. With her coat tightly around her, she burrowed further against him, bringing the blanket up to under her chin. Whilst the blanket did its job of keeping them warm, nothing compared to the heat radiating off his body. 

“Thank you, thank you for all of this.” She whispered, breaking the silence as his thumb curled to stroke her cheek. The jewellery he gave her that morning, a ruby heart pendant, so that his heart could be close to hers. The dinner at one of the fanciest restaurants in the city, the carriage ride home but mostly for his time. She knew how busy he was with his secret missions, having time where day would roll into night then into the following morning before he pulled away his computer. Many nights of going to bed alone and waking up alone to find him passed out on the coach from exhaustion. For him to take this time to be with her, just the two of them, was a Christmas miracle in itself.

“I pray everyday, thank every star in the galaxy for having you be a part of my life.” Taking her hand on his chest and bringing it to his lips, pressing small kisses to her knuckles. “I’m the one who should be thanking you.” She called out his name softly, amber eyes of liquid honey melting her gaze as she leaned up to him. Pressing her lips against his in a tender kiss. The rest of the world forgotten about as they continued in a passion frenzy of small kisses, each time one would pull away the other would chase after them.

Her hands holding the sharp line of his jaw to keep him against her, his arm around her pressed his hand on her lower back to keep her close. His other hand dipping below the blanket to press his palm against her bare thigh. 

“I love you so much.” He whispered so softly that she barely heard it. It was as fragile as the snowflakes beginning to fall from the sky. Everything he had was hers in this moment. No time for jokes or belly shaking laughter, right now was a moment of passion. The rest of the world fading into the background as wrapped her arms around his neck to pull him closer.

“I love you too!” Her eyes sparkled like the stars above them, their confessions of love between only them. His lips found hers again, this time in a slower, in a more sensual way. Not breaking apart as his tongue ran along her bottom lip before pushing into her mouth, his hand on her thigh pushing upwards to part them. 

“Saeyoung.” Her cheeks reddening at his fingers grazed over the thin cotton of her underwear. But before she could protest the hand on her back moved up to hold her neck and her back in for another deep kiss. 

Her mouth parted with a barely audible curse as his fingers pressed beneath her underwear, spreading the wetness from her core over her slit. One hand curled against his shirt, pupils widening at the pressure of his pads against her clit. Circling in a tight manner that made her gasp against his mouth, capturing each sound as his tongue gilded against hers. 

The way her hazel eyes glossed over as they fluttered open and shut, her legs parted open just slightly further apart from his actions was enough for him to delve deeper, pushing a finger into her. Followed by another shortly after. His touch guided from memory, knowing exactly where to curl and press his fingers against to make her thighs clamp against his hand. 

Their moment hidden beneath the blanket, her noises captured into his mouth and drowned out by the sound of the sleigh bells from the chains and the patter of hooves on the stone floor. And when her walls began to tighten over his fingers, he quickened his pace bringing her to an overwhelming high. Until a strangled telltale-whine vibrated against his lips and essence coaxed his knuckle deep fingers, her release hitting her quickly before taking over her in strong waves. 

The defender of justice watched in awe, the light perspiration on her face gave her a radiant glow amongst the snowy background, highlighting her beauty even more so. Her skin flushed red, lips parted still wet from their kisses and her eyes ladened heavy with lust and love. 

He wiped his fingers against the skin of her thighs before pulling her into a warm embrace against his chest. Nurturing kisses pressed against her crowd whilst he tenderly stroked her hair, basking in the peaceful silence as the sleigh took the path to home. A place Saeyoung couldn’t wait to be back too to shower her with all his affection. 

And for the first time ever, he couldn’t wait for Christmas, although to him, everyday he woke up with her in his arms felt even better than Christmas.

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