#I’m mostly neutral about the majority of them

[tammyisobsessedwith]

I’m a bit late to the party with the tier list, but here is my take:

I surprised myself with some of my own opinions, ngl

Like Valentina or Tom

#litg #love island the game #tier list #litg bobby #litg tim #litg will #favorites #I’m mostly neutral about the majority of them #went back and forth for a couple of them #like jakub and lily #I can tolerate them #but lucy and dylan are a hard pass #they should couple up actually #and form one of those insufferable insta couples #tammy has opinions

[lawchwan]

love alphabet (law)

note: i found this alphabet template but i can't find the original creator since i found it. if anyone knows, please inform me so i could credit.

Disclaimer: its mostly sfw but P, K, and Y, as p and y are nsfw and k is suggestive. also, i tried my best to keep it as gender-neutral as i could but some may be referenced as fem... but the majority is gender neutral.

crossposted in ao3

A = Affection (PDA, what sort of affection they give)

as many as one would say about him and pda, i’m also a firm believer that law is not a big fan of pda. however, that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t enjoy showcasing his love for you. everyone has a love language and law has one, and its quality time. your mere presence calms him down, so he puts in the efforts to incorporate you in all activities he’s in in the modern universe, and all adventures in the canon universe (as long as you’re not injured and are nowhere near in danger).

however, he’ll only do any form of pda if he’s feeling jealous and possessive and sees someone trying to make a move on you, so it's not like he minds it, it's more of his comfort.

furthermore, he’s EXTRA affectionate in private. I’d even argue that he’s much more clingy in private than he is in public. he’ll never showcase that clingy whiny side of his in public and if you so mention it to anyone, then trust you’ll lose all privileges.

B = Babies (Anything you want about babies)

for law, I don’t believe he’s the type to want kids. I don’t think he’s against it, I just think he’d rather have pets/plants than actual babies. I can see him being a cat dad honestly.

but you best believe that if you were to have his kid, he’d be such an attentive and overprotective father and if anyone ever so lay a hand on his child, he’d sure cut their limbs into pieces. (both literally and figuratively)

C = Cuddles (How they cuddle or are cuddled)

it truly depends on the mood and who initiates it. if you saw him lying in bed or on the couch and you got on top of him, he’ll just wrap his arms around you as you lay on his chest. he’ll probably also have a book in his hand, so in true law fashion, he won’t say much so he’ll just do the action more than say anything.

simultaneously, when you lay on the bed and if he’s really tired due to work, he’ll just groan and pull you into him and let himself lay on top of you with his face nuzzling on your neck without suffocating you. you’d simply ask him how his day went and he’d just grumble back an “nghh” which means ‘I don’t feel like talking, let me just lay in peace’ and you just simply rub his back as he falls into a slumber.

TLDR; he can be a baby when he’s tired

D = Darling  (Pet names)

He's not the biggest pet name guy but he’s the type to call you “babe/baby” if not by your name or how he’d call you “(y/n)-ya”

E = Enamored (how hard do they fall when in love)

you know the trope “they fell first, he fell harder”? I feel like if law was a trope, he’d be that.

law is nowhere near affectionate or emotional, but once you came into his life, you’ve impacted him in ways no one would think of, and yet you’re all he thinks of. he would even “subtly” mention you from time to time, and he wouldn’t notice how much he talks about you until Shachi and Penguin call him out on it and make fun of him for it (and he’d be in denial about it of course)

“y’know, (y/n) would love this necklace because it has their birthstone on it and I know how much they—“

“We know, bro, you’ve talked about them in the past hour.”

“NO, I DON’T!”

F = Firsts (A first on anything you pick)

if one would ask the two of you how your first kiss went, you’d get different responses from you and Law; with you finding it adorable and endearing, and him finding it embarrassing.

you two were in his room, alone, and watching a movie that you two have been wanting to watch but never got the chance until now. but despite the desire to watch, the two kept glancing at each other (mostly initiated by law, but he could never admit it), one hoping the other to just make a move.

law was never that experienced so he was nervous. using his knowledge from his time as a medical student, a little bit of his general psychology course, and the shows and media he consumes, he just went for it, and to say he went in deep would be an understatement.

although you were shocked at first, you kissed him back but you noticed that he suddenly went stiff and didn’t move as smoothly as he first did, so you pulled away and asked him if he was okay. and he looked at you like a deer in headlights.

“… I froze, didn’t I?”

law refuses to retell that story and is embarrassed every time you mention it.

G = Good Morning (How do they wake you up)

you’re dealing with an insomniac man, you tell me how it goes.

no, but in all seriousness, he’ll be very groggy so he’ll probably be the type to oversleep, so you have to wake him up. but if he ever woke you up, it’d probably be if he accidentally made his presence loud and you crave him.

but if you two happened to oversleep, then you got Shachi, Penguin, and Bepo barging in, yelling, and jumping on the bed to wake you two up like they’re overgrown children.

(in the modern universe; he’ll just push them out and glare at them to get out. meanwhile in the canon universe; he’ll simply use his devil fruit powers and just switch them out with specs of dust around the polar tank)

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs?)

oddly enough, for a cold individual, his hugs are warm and soothing to have around. again, he doesn’t give out hugs to anyone except you and maybe Bepo, but with that fact, his hugs just hit different with you.

he rarely asks for it, and he’ll give it to you if you want it… however, remember how I said he’ll participate in doing PDA if he’s feeling possessive? yeah, you best believe he’s the type to hug you from behind as you talk to the individual in front of you.

think like this:

I = In Labor (Labour and Delivery)

oh, you’re highly blessed to have law by your side. As a doctor, he’s very much prepared to take care of you while in labor and knows how to keep calm in your delivery process.

but deep down, as your boyfriend, he’s highly concerned and scared for you and your baby.

suffice to say, underneath that stoic, calm, and collected doctor, is a very scared man who wishes he could get rid of the pain of his significant other.

J = Jealousy (Are they jealous? How do they handle it?)

I’d say Law is a very secure guy in his relationship and once you’re in a relationship with him, you’re expected to be loyal to him as he is to you, so he has nothing to worry about if you fulfill that promise.

however, he does have his moments where he needs to step in to showcase to the person in front of you that you’re off the market and that you have a boyfriend who’s not afraid to cause chaos for their sake.

I’d say he’s more possessive than jealous.

K = Kisses (How do they kiss? How often?)

oh, his kiss just hits differently as much as his hugs.

while he hates PDA (or so he says), he is the type to give you a quick peck before leaving somewhere for an entire day, whether privately or in front of people. just a quick peck on the cheek or forehead in public, on the lips in private.

speaking of privacy, his kisses are also very loving in private. he loves to get into full-on make-out sessions with you on the bed, sometimes it does get sexual, but other times you two can’t get each other off of each other.

L = Loyal (How loyal are they?)

the law would kill for his crew, and you’re as special as his crew. law gives me the vibes of “I’ll take a bullet for the one I love, and if I survive, I’ll kill whoever tried to hurt the one I love” and it's a big claim since law is a very distrustful person and doesn’t let ANYONE in his life that easy.

so if you ever thought of breaking your loyalty and betraying law in any way, you’re practically dead to him.

M = Memory (Their favorite memory about you?)

when asked about your favorite memory, you’d say “Your first kiss with him” and he would yell at you, “NO!”

all jokes aside, his favorite memory is possibly when you two started working together. he can’t pinpoint why, it's not like you guys met under the best circumstances, but when you two started talking and getting to know each other through work, he started to get enamored by your presence and just wanted to know more about you.

N = Never! (Dealbreakers)

breaking your loyalty to him and you deliberately expose his vulnerable side to other people. Any betrayal is a big dealbreaker to him, but these two would set him off. like I’ve mentioned above in the loyalty section, do either of these and you’re dead to him.

O = On the Rocks (How do they make up?)

law is not the most emotionally intuitive but that doesn’t mean he’s not emotionally intelligent. While Law is not the most talkative, he does try to communicate with you and you two mainly hash out your problems and apologize if needed.

however, law is a levelheaded person, so as long as you don’t pull any dumb stunt like a certain someone, *cough* luffy *cough* you’re fine.

P = Playtime (Any headcanons on sex)

While Law’s not the most vocal, he’s the type to let out groans and slight whimpers in your ears when he reaches his climax.

and while he enjoys being dominant during sex, he does want to tap into his submissive side sometime in the future (which includes pegging), but his pride wouldn’t allow him. maybe it's a trust issue thing, so once he can trust 100%, he can reconsider

Q = Quiet Time (How do they wind down?)

just simply having your presence calms him down, especially when you two cuddle on his couch/bed, that sure puts him at ease.

R = Rapture (What makes them happy?)

your judgment-free perspective and your ability to hear him out without outright criticizing and mocking him makes this man feel so at ease. and with your loving smile, it sure makes his dopamine levels go up.

S = Soulmate (What do they think of soulmates?)

I don’t think Law would be a firm believer in soulmates. I don’t how to explain it but he never came off as someone who believes in such things due to him feeling like each time he gets close to someone, he loses them. so finding a “soulmate” doesn’t sound like something he’d be interested in.

however, with having you and his crew, he believes there’s something deeper to it, just like how he felt with Corazon… but he’s afraid that with that deep feeling, that would mean he’d lose you guys…

it's very complicated and he can never give you a direct answer, so oftentimes he’ll either say no or I don’t know.

T = Together (What do you like to do together?)

lounging around and reading a book together. sounds very typical of law, but what else could he do? he’s not the most extroverted individual and he certainly doesn’t like loud environments so having some quiet sessions with you is ideal for him.

U = Unyielding (How do they handle interlopers in the relationship?)

law is the king of being unbothered and masters the art of not giving a fuck. not to toot his own horn, but Law is hyper-aware that he’s good-looking and anyone would wish to be in your position. while he doesn’t see what you and others see in him, he understands that people do fawn over his intimidating and mysterious aura.

so he does get girls (and sometimes guys) to throw themselves at him and try to get in between you and him, only for him to embarrass them by apathetically rejecting their advances. no amount of luring could ever get to him as he would just hit them with his signature scowl and roll his eyes at them. his love for you is THAT deep.

meanwhile in your case… I’d be a broken record so go back to the jealousy and the whole PDA discourse.

V = Vulnerable (Are they vulnerable often? How do they handle it?)

law is not always vulnerable, thanks to his pride, trust issues, and trauma, but when he does become vulnerable, you better keep that shit to yourself and bury it in your grave. That's an oath you need to keep.

you’ll see him sometimes start tearing up and talk about how much he misses his family, old friends, and Corazon. his face would become red due to his crying as he pouts and starts to talk about his feelings.

you’d comfort him and eye him with a loving and supportive look. he would make eye contact with you through teary eyes and witness your look. that look solidified his trust in you and how comfortable he is talking about his feelings.

W = Wedding (Wedding headcanons)

law is not a big celebratory person, but he doesn’t simply want a courthouse wedding. not because he doesn’t want it, but because he knows that his crew would pester him for it and you would just laugh at their arguments, even if you don’t mind having a courthouse wedding.

so he’ll just have a small wedding, think kind of a backyard type of wedding where only the closest people are in attendance. while it's not big, you two would wear your elegant wedding attire and you two would shine together.

he just loves the small intimate ceremonies where all his favorite people gathered around and no one to disturb this beautiful moment.

X = (E)x (How do they handle exes? What do they do if they see them)

law is not that experienced in relationships so it's not like he had many exes and if he were to have one, he’d not acknowledge them if he saw them from afar. if they did walk up to them, he’d simply just apologize and walk away. it's not that law is not confrontational, it's just, what the hell was he supposed to do? the relationship’s done, there’s nothing to reignite.

I feel like Law’s the type who would not go back to his ex, even if he fell hard for them and still has slight feelings for them.

Y = Yearning (What do they do when they miss you?)

he’ll never admit it, and no matter how many times you’ve caught him, he’ll still not admit and deny it, but this man takes your clothes and/or pillows and constantly smells them until he sleeps.

it started with your pillow from your shared bed. you left to hang out with ikkaku and you may have lingered a bit longer than expected, and you came back later than you should have. you expected to be lightly scolded by law as you walked into the room, but instead, you were met with the sight of him sleeping with your pillow (and your discarded hoodie from earlier?), wrapping its arms around it like how he’d usually do with you.

it was an adorable sight, and when you call him out on it he’d be like “Huh? What are you talking about? I probably moved in my sleep” Yeah sure, Jan.

**NSFW**

furthermore, law has stolen your panties previously. when you were gone, Law, unfortunately, caught himself in a position where he desperately needed you. he eyes down at the imprint between his legs through his sweatpants.

he palms it as he hisses out a light cuss, wishing you could just walk in and take care of him, but he knows you won’t be here anytime soon. so he’ll take the closest thing to having you, he gets up to your drawer and fishes out your lace underwear.

he stared at it as he went back to his chair and he proceeded to palm himself through his sweatpants once again. he gripped your panties as he lowered his pants and boxers, revealing his hard cock, gasping at the air making contact with his sensitive skin.

he cusses at himself and calls himself a pervert for doing what he’s about to do as he wraps your panties around and starts to stroke it.

little does he know, you came in earlier than expected and walked into the hottest sight you’ve witnessed.

Z = Zzz… (Sleeping headcanons)

law is a small spoon, argue with the wall. he loves to lay on your chest as he enjoys the sound of your heartbeat (no pun intended), while he wraps his arms around your middle. he also loves it when you stroke his hair, it makes him go to sleep almost instantly as you see him roll his eyes and began to let out a tiny snore as he falls to sleep.

he sleeps like a baby all in all, and you love to take care of him.

characters are owned by oda. i will not tolerate nor accept translation, reposts on other websites, or plagiarism. divider made by mmadeinheavenn.

#one piece headcanons #trafalgar d law x reader #trafalgar law x reader #law x reader #trafalgar law smut #trafalgar law one piece #sage's trafalgar law #trafalgar law #trafalgar d law #trafalgar law fic

[copperbadge]

RE watching thoughts: I’m not 100% sure, but it might be that the whole “I am not my thoughts” is about engaging and identifying with your metacognition MORE than your initial thoughts. Because I get where you’re coming from - what is a consciousness but a collection of thoughts and feelings? But you can also have thoughts about your own thoughts that are more useful for dealing with whatever situation you’re in, I guess. (Random aside - every time I start thinking about thinking about thinking my brain inevitably starts thinking about Tiffany Aching and The Wee Free Men.)

I really should have replied to this ask sooner because it's going to seem like a non-sequitur now (this was sent much earlier in March) but I'm kind of glad I didn't, because I've been chatting with people about this and I think I understand more why there's an emphasis in some therapies on the idea that we are not our thoughts.

(I uh, haven't read the Tiffany books so I'm not much help there.)

I am coming to understand that many, perhaps most, people judge themselves, comprehensively and harshly, based on their thoughts. Perhaps it's just a lot of people who struggle with mental health, but given the commonality of the sentiment I don't know if I'd confine it that tightly; generally it appears that people cannot conceive of themselves as anything other than a binary of good or bad. So many people I've talked to about this portion of DBT, the watching-questioning-identifying thoughts portion, say that it helps to snap them out of a spiral of "I'm a horrible person, I deserve to suffer/die, I can never be redeemed" after they've failed at something, or had a negative thought, or reacted poorly to an unexpected event.

That is not something I've ever experienced. I mean, jokingly maybe, but not in a real, internal sense.

And that's not to brag -- I'm not saying I think I'm a good person, either, because I don't think I'm a good person. I don't conceive of myself in terms of good or bad. I never cuddle my cats and think "I'm such a good cat dad" or forget to feed them and think "I should die now." I have a perpetual morally neutral attitude towards my own existence; my thoughts and actions might trend me one direction or another but I'm aware of the temporary nature of that. If I fuck up I'll worry about who I might have hurt or whether I'll be fired or what's going to happen as a consequence, if I am polite to someone who didn't deserve it I know I was acting kindly in the moment, but I don't make an inherent moral judgement of myself based on that. And it seems like the vast majority of people do. Which you would think would make me feel pretty good about myself, but honestly...I don't know.

A lot of people I know who have ADHD or are Autistic have talked about seeing themselves as other, as alien -- like that one webcomic artist who draws themself with little antennae to indicate they're strange and different. I've always understood why one might do that, but I never felt that way myself, before or after the diagnosis. After all, let's remember, I was The Normal* Child of my siblings, and if I was The Normal One before the diagnosis, why wouldn't I remain Mostly Normal after?

* As ever, I'm using "normal" as a cultural term, to indicate what we think of as mainstream, not because normal is a thing that really exists.

My life has been relatively solitary -- I have friends and family and I love them but I'm rarely part of a large group, I don't spend a lot of time out in public interacting with people, I'm not a big socializer. Before the Adderall, I really couldn't be, I took too much psychic damage from interpersonal interaction, so I chose those very carefully. And now my DBT class has been a rare moment when I'm encountering contradictions to a lot of my assumptions about the way human beings in our society interact, react, and behave. I just...don't fit that mold very well. I think of it as having crossed wiring, not in the sense that I'm faulty but just in the sense that I'm very, very different. Not Normal. It's not exactly a bad feeling but it's certainly not a great one, internalizing the sensation of alienness.

DBT is proving to be a mixed bag but not in the way I or my therapist intended -- it seems to be either things I was already instinctively doing or things that simply do not apply to me. In one way it's disappointing because it means there isn't much help to be had (we're a little over halfway through the course and I keep thinking "Maybe next class will be useful") but on the other hand it's validating that so much of what I came up with myself as unconscious coping mechanisms is literally what I would have been told to do anyway.

Sometimes it's a combination of both, though, which really blows. I guess most people, if they reframe another person's actions, actually find emotional relief in that, and I don't. An example from the class is that if someone is rude to you, you can consider how they might be having a hard day, and be polite in return; that's great, in terms of defusing a situation, and it's something I do a fair amount of. But apparently it's also something that for most people results in feeling less awful about the interaction, and that's not the case for me. Which is why so much of DBT feels to me like lying to oneself. It's not lying for most people.

So, yeah. I'm going to finish out the course and keep trying things with the therapist but I suspect given everything, I might already be at "as good as it gets" in terms of emotional work. Which isn't the worst thing in the world, and there is still the option to try medication that could help, but I think there will come a point where I'm going to have to deal with the fallout of just how different I am, and how that has impacted my life. Might end up a good thing; something I've really been trying to resolve is unhappiness over being unpartnered and highly likely to remain that way, and at least if this provides a better understanding of why, then perhaps I can process that and put it to rest in a way I've been trying to do but not succeeding well at.

So, we'll see. But I find it both fascinating and kind of horrifying how many people can believe they are irredeemably bad, even if the belief is only temporary, simply because they had an uncharitable thought or impulse. It makes me somewhat grateful for the crossed wires, at least.

#sam has adhd #therapy #dbt

[doriana-gray-games]

Will there be an option to play as a trans Sherlock? I mostly play transmasc character and I'd really like an option that specifies they're trans 😢

You can specify that the mc is gender-neutral and uses they/them pronouns.

I’m not sure if I will add more or not, tbh 🤔 it’s something I’m thinking about. But also something I worry about. I wouldn’t want to do it wrong or badly, etc.

I suppose my biggest current concern is that for the GN MC, for example, I chose to go (at the behest of tumblr anons tbh) in a sort of “people magically know and respect your pronouns” direction and instead of being specific about the experiences and actions and moments it’s as vague and GN as possible to allow for as much headcanon-ing as possible.

And I have recently been thinking that that was perhaps the wrong direction for my game.

After having talked to people who prefer a more specific or even “historically accurate” approach, I did a poll on the forum on what people prefer. And the majority of people who played with GN MCs seemed to be interested in a more specific approach.

And so if I did more trans inclusion for MC, I’d probably want to do it more specifically (example features like choosing masc/fem, separate pronouns, additional bodily features, agab, assumed gender, etc). Partly because it’s what it seems people want, and partly because tbh writing a piece as vague as possible is incredibly dull to implement and usually hinders a lot of emotional impact and can affect all the versions of the text into the written version of grey goo.

But with this addition of scope, the historical aspect, and the minority of users who would absolutely loathe me dabbling in this area in any specificity, it feels like an enormous task. I suppose those are the reasons I hesitate. And so I have no answer right now.

Once I know more, so will you.

❤️

[aviscarrentals]

Yelp • Chapter 1 ls2

masterlist previous chapter next chapter

words: 1.5k

warnings: cursing, implied off"screen" deaths, injury/blood, implied character death

notes: this first chapter is mostly just exposition (and a little sad i know), but at the very end you get a sneak peak of the action before everything turns totally cray. (there will be more defined logan x parker in the future chapters as well.) parker is supposed to be the "reader" character. i decided to use a gender-neutral name instead of y/n because that's not my thing. she/her pronouns and feminine descriptions are used, but her gender is not a major plot point at all, so you can totally still read this imagining parker however you want. i hope you enjoy!

“God, it’s so weird just going right back to school like nothing’s even happened,” Parker started.

“Yeah,” Logan agreed. “Five fucking kids are dead, but science! Calculus! English!” he finished mockingly.

“Well, four,” Oscar corrected him, Lily nodding along.

Logan let out a large exhale and nodded. “Crazy he survived that shit considering how fucked up the rest of them were.”

“Well, you know what they say about quiet kids,” Arthur chimed in. The other five immediately turned to look at him in confusion.

“What?” Fred questioned incredulously.

“What?” Arthur demanded. “They’re like actually really cool and badass and stuff.”

“Huh?” Logan inquired with a furrowed brow. “I thought the thing was that they’re like… kinky and shit.”

“Mate, what the fuck?” Arthur responded defensively. “Why would I say that?”

“Well, that’s like the thing people say,” Logan bickered. “I don’t know what the fuck you’re talking about, but I’ve never heard anyone say that in my entire life.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Arthur retorted, making them all burst out into laughter for a brief moment before they all returned to a somber silence when they remembered the conversation that led them here in the first place.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to walk you to class?” Logan pressed, his pleading tone making it obvious that he was asking for his own sake instead of his girlfriend’s.

“No,” Parker laughed him off, pushing his chin off of her shoulder and his arms from around her waist. “The health room is all the way on the other side of the building. You’ll be late. Again.”

“Yeah, well-” Logan began to protest before his newest complaint was interrupted by a loud crack behind him that made the both of them jump. They turned around to see Zhou Guanyu staring back at them guiltily.

“Sorry,” he started to apologize “I just dropped-”

“Oh, no, that’s okay,” Logan interrupted, as Parker reached down to pick up the textbook that fell from his locker.

“Thank you,” he said with a shy smile when she handed it back to him.

“No problem,” she reassured him, returning the expression. “It’s the least I can do, especially considering…” She trailed off, instead gesturing to his left arm which was fully encased in a sling.

After a moment of awkward silence, the girl spoke up again. “Um, what class do you have next? I can help you carry your things,” she offered.

“Bio,” he answered, “but it’s alright,” the boy quickly added. “It’s not far, I wouldn't want you to go out of your way-”

“No, that’s perfect,” she interrupted. “I’ve got psych first period, so I’m headed to the science wing too,” she explained, lifting the heavy load from his hands, right as the morning bell rang.

“Alright,” Logan said, leaning over his girlfriend’s shoulder to give her an instinctual kiss on the cheek. “I better get going. If I’m late to Mrs. K’s class one more time I think she might beat me to death with one of the CPR dummies.”

Parker immediately bore her eyes into her boyfriend’s soul at his word choice, the poor boy not remembering his audience until the words had already left his mouth. Looking like a deer in headlights, he simply turned around and scurried off.

“Sorry,” Parker apologized once she turned back to Zhou, embarrassed.

“It’s okay,” he said, chuckling.

“Shit, we better get going or we’ll be late too.”

“You guys know Zhou, right?” Parker asked the group in front of her as she led the incapacitated boy to her customary lunch spot under the oak trees in the school courtyard. The two were met with a chorus of “yeah”s and welcomes.

“I hope it’s okay that I sit with you guys today,” he asked timidly.

“Yeah, great to have you, man,” Liam assured him as Lily reached across the table to relieve Parker of the extra lunch tray.

“Didn’t we have trig together last year, mate?” Dennis piped up to ask him.

“Um… I’m not sure. I don’t think I would recognize you in class,” the bashful boy responded, leading to a roaring bout of laughter from the crowd.

“Goddamn! He got your ass, Hauger,” Jack said through a fit of childish giggles.

As the conversation continued, Parker couldn’t help but notice that one of the usual members of their crew was missing. “Hey, babe,” she said as she nudged her boyfriend’s rib to get his attention.

“What?”

“Where’s Paul?” she asked, concerned. “He said he was coming to school when I checked in on him yesterday,” the girl recalled.

“Yo, Bearman,” Logan called quietly to the younger boy sitting across from them.

“What’s up?” Ollie questioned, eyebrows raised.

“Have you seen Paul at all today? Did he change his mind about coming in?”

“No, he’s here,” Ollie informed the couple. “I think he probably just wants some time to himself right now. Usually…” he trailed off.

Parker and Logan nodded in understanding. Usually Paul wasn’t the only Aron present at the lunch table.

“How are you holding up?” Parker inquired, giving the boy’s hand a gentle squeeze. Paul had lost a brother, but Ollie had lost the next best thing. His best friend. “I’m alright, thanks for asking,” he replied a little too quickly, flitting his eyes away from the couple before abruptly turning to rejoin the ongoing conversation to his right.

Logan and Parker shared a sad glance, but decided it was better to leave the boy be. Paul probably wasn’t the only one who needed space.

“So,” Arthur’s voice rang out, gathering everyone’s attention. “We’ve got Wednesday off, what say you all we hang at my place tomorrow night.”

“OMG! Sleepover!” Jack shrieked in a high pitched voice, eliciting a few snorts from the kids surrounding him.

“Shut up, Doofus,” Arthur shouted at him playfully.

“That’s not my name, Lecdumbass,” the other boy snapped back, overdramatically rolling his eyes in jest.

“Anyways…” Arthur hollered over his friends’ audible amusement, attempting to gather their attention again. “Is everybody in? You too, Guanyu,” he clarified, to which the meek boy simply nodded, much to the others’ delight. “Awesome!”

As everyone else agreed to the plan, Jack interrupted once again. “Can’t. My parents have been totally freaking out over all this shit. You know how they are. So, unfortunately, the only party I will be attending is Doohan family game night hosted at 15 Fairview Road. Sorry, gang.”

“Well, hope you have fun playing Scrabble with Mummy tonight,” Liam teased.

“Yeah,” Dennis joined in sarcastically, “maybe if you’re lucky she’ll let you have a scoop of chocolate ice cream too. With sprinkles!”

“Alright, fuck you all, I’m out of here,” Jack countered, beginning to gather his things in perfect unison with the end-of-lunch bell.

“Bye-bye, Doofenshmirtz!” Parker called to the boy’s back.

“See ya when Mama Doohan lets you out of your cage again,” her boyfriend added with a big grin, made even wider when Jack simply flipped them off as he continued walking away.

Dennis had worked his ass off all summer. He wanted that spot on the team and he wanted it bad. So, in the month leading up to tryouts, he had to keep up his training. And if Coach saw how dedicated he was maybe that would benefit him too.

After another grueling workout under the hot September sun, Dennis made his way back to the empty locker room. He could smell, see, feel, and taste the sweat on his body, making him strip off his soaked through shirt before the door had even fully closed behind him. He needed a shower ASAP.

All of a sudden, he felt the air knocked out of his lungs as his back hit the ground, letting out a strident wheeze. He laid there for a moment, groaning in pain and sweating even harder than before. Wait, no. That wasn’t sweat…

The boy wearily lifted his head off the ground, still recovering from the harsh impact of his fall, only to see the entire floor of the room flooded.

“What the fuck?” he sighed out with the little breath he was able to collect.

He slowly lifted himself back to his feet, ignoring his spinning head, until he looked down at where he had been only to be greeted by a river of pink floating in the shallow water. He reached his fingers to softly touch the back of his throbbing head and was immediately met with an intense pain and sticky, red blood covering his hand.

The boy sluggishly stumbled forward toward the sinks in order to better assess the situation and clean his open wound. The only sounds he could make out were his laboured breaths and the splashes of his feet meeting the puddles beneath him. Splish. Splash. Splish. Splash. Splish. He paused for a moment as the world spun around him.

Splash.

But the sound of that extra step behind him didn’t register in time for him to save himself.

taglist (if you would like to be added or removed just lmk!): @gaypoetsblog @koris-009 @feralnando @disneyprincemuke @osbuzz @avaayalaa @faithshouseofchaos @thearchieves @scuderia-piastri @lovelytsunoda @localwhoore @foreveralbon @vroomvroomcircuit @mclarengf @lipringlrh

#f1 #formula 1 #logan sargeant #oscar piastri #lily zneimer #arthur leclerc #fred vesti #zhou guanyu #liam lawson #dennis hauger #jack doohan #paul aron #ollie bearman #scream x yn #scream x you #scream x reader #horror #logan sargeant fic #logan sargeant fanfic #logan sargeant imagine #logan sargeant x reader #logan sargeant x you #aviscarrentals #i want to play a (racing) game #iwtparg: yelp #f1 x female reader #f1 x y/n #f1 x oc #f1 x you #f1 x reader

[incorrect-riordanverse]

It's really disheartening that Rick Riordan stance on the war I understand that he wants to be neutral on this stance but in my opinion by becoming neutral he only worsening the issue as many Palestines are dying that are mostly children, how the majority of Israeli are supporting the Genocide of Palestine, and how the government is trying so hard (but miserably failing) to justified the genocide. I will hold him accountable for what he said on this issue as during this period the choice is basically "you are with us or against us."

Part of me wishes he will realize what he said was wrong and understand the bigger issue that plays at hand. I will criticism for his actions as how can a man who promotes LGBTQIA and representation of minorities and disabilities in his books turn a blind eyes to Genocide of people. However we can only wait and see on his next move.

One last thing about your previous you said you don't group Riordan with other authors where do you would group him with? Also this is more on an opinion base answer but many people are boycotting companies that support Israel there as been another post on Twitter on boycotting authors. Rick Riordan happens to be one of them. Do you believed that he should be boycotted with other authors or he should be properly educated and apologized for his previous statement? If you believed he should be boycotted what do tou have to say to those who might have the mentality of "separate the art from the artist"

thank you for this ask, and i completely agree with you! it is extremely hypocritical of him considering what he preaches for in his books. i think he’s convinced he has properly addressed the apartheid by using very vague language that can be applied to anything, and in doing so, he’s addressed nothing really.

your first question on who i would group him with— probably other authors who are doing the exact same as him in their virtue signalling. i always like to link my other blogs to each other, so i don’t think it’s a secret that i have a red queen account and i’m pretty passionate about that. unfortunately, victoria aveyard is another fantasy author who has literally wrote a whole four-book series on the uprising against oppression but is now playing neutral in her address of the apartheid. rebecca yarros is in the same boat, although i haven’t read ‘fourth wing,’ fans have said there are large themes of oppression within the book. so if i had to group riordan it would probably be in the ‘i-like-to-write-about-it-for-profit-and-praise-only’ group.

in terms of boycotting, i think that’s a great idea! i would also like to remind everyone that the percy jackson tv show is coming out in a little over a month, but disney is a huge industry financially supporting israel as well ($2 million in funding), which is obviously far more damning than a poorly written address by one person. there is a boycott happening for disney as well— and the pjo show will be released on disney + . i implore everyone to not watch it on that platform!! personally i will be pirating it online (idk if i’ll get into trouble saying that here but lol oh well), because im pretty sure the boycott is only for withdrawing financial support, not simply consuming media.

i feel like separating art from the artist only works if that artist is… like, dead, and you’re using that art and its values as a historical insight to how the world was during its time. you can still like a piece of work that has a problematic artist, you can engage with the work (to an extent). but separating art from the artist barely works because either:

to engage with the art is to support the artist in some way, so that artist is making money based on your interaction with that (particularly in the case for singers and streaming of songs)

that artists’ views and values are so rancid that it’s literally embedded within the text itself. to ignore it is harmful.

harry potter is my all-time favourite example to use, because jkr is the scum of the earth, and her views are entrenched in her work. a lesser known example is sarah j maas and her books (she’s also not as dogshit as jkr, but then again, its not hard to be a better person than her). i’m not going to bag on these people for liking things by problematic people (would be hypocritical of me), i just think it’s cowardly not to address it when you come across it, or at least admit to it. to simply write things off as ‘separate to the artist’ is like purposefully turning off your critical thinking skills.

on whether boycotting or an apology is enough— if riordan did apologise and used specific language and not the nonsense he had in that blog, expressed his remorse for his ignorance and then actually did or said something to support the people of palestine then, yeah. that’s fine and that’s how we learn ig. but he should educate himself, too many activists, people from the arab community and especially palestinians are expected to be all-knowing and to educate everyone else on an already draining and personal tragedy. it’s been exhausting for me, i can’t imagine what they’re going through. if riordan (or anyone) needs to be educated, he should do it himself, and (at least in my opinion) i don’t think the info is very hard to find now. it’s just about weeding out the misinformation.

i think boycotting is a good idea as of now. it can serve to be a catalyst for self reflection for many people. also, as much as i hate most online discourses, talking about it online needs to happen. i don’t want these authors to forget, for a moment, about the ignorance they posted online during a time of international crisis.

#sorry if this is so messy. its 3am where i am rn #i finished two exams today and my brain is deaddd #but ty for this ask! #i have sooo many opinions about the whole ‘separate the art from artist’ and when to boycott something #because usually im actually not a big fan of boycotting. i just dont think it works most of the time (at least recently) #boycotting as a way of ‘canceling’ someone is something i think is a bit silly for instance. #esp when people gonna forget about what that person did in like. two months at most #but i feel like this issue (especially for corporations funding millions of dollars into genocide) is big enough to warrant a call for- #-everyone to abstain financially from things #like it isnt someone saying some dumb shit online. theres a whole country being wiped out. #unfortunately so many corporations fund israel. an insidious amount. so just do ur best to navigate thru it #riordanverse #incorrect riordanverse #rick riordan #hoo #heroes of olympus #percy jackson #pjo #trials of apollo #toa #ask #anon #free palestine #percy jackson disney+ #pjo tv show #rewriting

[fanficsforheartandsoul]

New Recruit | Simon Riley x Masked!GN!Reader

To keep this as neutral as possible since anon did not specify the gender, this is written in 2nd POV. 

There are some spanish sentences here and although I’m actually learning the language with Duolingo (lmao) I used a translator for this, I apologize if it sounds clunky. I googled how to use gender neutral forms but I’m not sure if I did it correctly sooo.

Also, this is very short because I can’t for the love of god, produce words and a correct sentence in my head at the moment.

Fandom: Call of Duty: Modern Warfare II (2022)

Warnings: Ghost is OOC, Ghost might have a kink or more than one, Typical COD Pew Pew is Mostly Omitted, Injuries

Summary: A new member joins taskforce 141 for the hunt of Hassan but you are not what the others expect. Something sparks in Ghost when he shares eye contact with you and you two are on the same eye level.

Word Count: 2,3k

If you want to be tagged in my stories send me a pm with the fandom/character name! Or comment on the fic :)

Masterlist

It was already unusual for the taskforce to get a new member. Therefore it was even more unusual to get one in the middle of an important operation in another country. 

It wasn't exactly convenient but when would it ever be?

Fact was that Hassan Zyani, a major of the terror organization Al Qatala escaped their grasps.

They needed to work with Mexican Special Forces to follow his tracks, so if it was one more member or two, it didn’t really matter now. 

Yet it was quite a surprise when Ghost and Soap heard the news.

"Someone will join you in México, a new member of the taskforce. I wanted to introduce the lieutenant a bit later, but Chryso was in the country anyways, so I guess now is as good as ever."

Ghost listened silently to his captain on speaker phone while Soap asked the questions lingering in his head; what kind of muppet name was Chryso? And why would the soldier join them right now when they had something so important to do?

Trusting a stranger in a hostile environment wasn’t exactly an easy thing to do.

Price ignored Soap’s words deliberately and continued: 

“Chryso is already known to the Los Vaqueros and Alejandro and as you're aware they know their way around in Las Almas. Be nice and protect your backs. We will talk later and I’m sure Chryso will answer any questions you have.”

Great, Ghost thought and looked at the flabbergasted Soap who stared at the phone display showing the end of the call.

“He just hung up?? What the hell... I feel like someone just told me my sister got married in secret and I have to meet her husband.”

He raised an eyebrow but the other obviously couldn’t see it behind his skull mask.

“You have a sister?”

Soap blinked.

“No, but if I had one...”

Ghost sighed. He hoped that the new addition to the team wouldn’t mess up their operation and would focus on the task at hand. Catching Hassan.

-

You startled out of your sleep when you heard your call sign.

“They’re arriving in 5, Chryso” said Felipe, the Los Vaqueros soldier who was on the look out with you in one of the abandoned shacks close to the village where intel suggested Hassan Zyani’s location.

Your last undercover mission had taken a toll on your body and you tried to make up for it by napping whenever you could. Felipe’s humming had made you drowsy and apparently your consciousness had slipped away for a bit.

A quick glance at your combat watch proved that you had slept more than an hour and you sat up straight quickly.

“Perdón, you know my last OP still got me fucked up... Did anything move?”

“No pasa nada.”

The man waved his hand dismissively and watched as you stood up and stretched your arms. He had to tilt his head slightly to look up to you. Felipe's eyes wandered over your mask and then he said:

“They’re staying put and keeping quiet.”

You breathed out and rolled your shoulder. Maybe you shouldn’t have slept in such an uncomfortable position...

You were about to meet two members of Taskforce 141 - your new team - and group up with them and the Los Vaqueros to participate in one of their missions. No chit-chat and icebreakers, just business, straight-up. 

This was how work had always been with Captain John Price for the few times you had fought together, so it didn’t exactly bother you. But it was making you a bit antsy that he wouldn’t be part of the operation.

You weren’t exactly keen on entrusting your back to total strangers. Not with your... special circumstances.

Your habit of wearing a mask 24/7 often confused other people and many soldiers had treated you slightly differently due to it. Whether it was done deliberately or subconsciously, it often hampered with the beginning of your new relationships until people finally got used to it. Which usually took a while. Seen by the lack of other soldiers accompanying you and Felipe.

Strangely Price didn’t seem to react much to your mask. Maybe that was why you felt comfortable around him. He didn’t treat you any different, he had just looked at it once and then moved on. 

You hadn’t told him why you were wearing it but if anyone had to know, you would probably feel most comfortable telling him.

And when you had signed the contract to work as a new member of taskforce 141 you had mulled about doing it. Possibly when you would first see him again. You had believed that it would be today.

But he wouldn’t be part of this mission, which he told you 2 days ago. Instead Lieutenant Simon Riley and Sergeant John Mactavish would cover your back. 

You had heard their names before when Price talked to you about joining the taskforce but you didn’t know anything specific about them besides their names and ranks.

And Rodolfo and Alejandro didn’t let anything slip when you asked them if they knew anything about the two soldiers.

They did know more than you but based on the little smirk around Alejandro’s lips they purposely kept information from you, which annoyed you slightly.

But well, Alejandro was a colonel, furthermore the leader of Los Vaqueros and he obviously had to be informed about his allies in such a special operation. 

You knew not to question him and he wouldn’t keep anything dangerous from you, he wasn’t like that that’s what you could tell based on the few days you had spent at the Las Almas base. He kept his soldiers safe, had to in the corruption-filled town. 

And you would meet the other taskforce members soon anyways.

So you decided to focus on the task at hand and ignore everything else. Whether that would involve strange looks and stupid comments about your mask or not.

The Al Qatala terrorist had to be caught by all means. The files you had received told you enough about the threat he posed to basically everyone in this world. He wouldn’t escape your grasp. Not under your watch.

You strapped your black vest tighter and checked your gear.

A low hum announced the distant approach of some vehicles and Felipe looked out the window to see 3 black jeeps drive down the dirt road.

“They’re inbound.”

You nodded and followed him out of the room down the stairs.

-

"I have a feeling you'll fit right in, just like Y/N."

Ghost was still mulling over the strange comment of Rodolfo Parra, when they spotted the army checkpoint and Alejandro explained why they had to evade it and he forgot the words quickly.

However, when their convoy arrived at the other side of the river in their AO, he and Soap exited the truck and a few seconds later when he first exchanged eye contact with you, he remembered the words instantly. 

You had just moved out of the shack, following a Los Vaqueros soldier. Your back was turned towards the convoy when the man told you something and he gesticulated while you checked your back pockets.

Ghost noted that the soldier talking to you was at least a head smaller than you. You were clad in back and his interest peaked when he realized that your head was covered by a hood. Oh...?

He followed Soap behind Alejandro and Rodolfo and walked up to you while the other Los Vaqueros soldiers readied their guns and spread out. 

“No me gusta el hecho de que no tengamos refuerzos” he heard you say through your clenched teeth and your counterpart hummed in agreement. 

Alejandro coughed and you turned to face them while he introduced you to him and Soap. Your eyes roamed over them and they lingered a bit longer on him, which made Ghost’s heart beat quicker for some reason.

“This is lieutenant Y/N L/N”, the colonel announced and the smirk on his lips suddenly made sense. He just stared and Soap did the same. 

“Just call me Chryso” you said and gave Alejandro an annoyed look that the other ignored and you turned your head back to look at Ghost and you stretched out your hand. 

Ghost’s voice was rougher than usual when he told you his name: 

“...Simon Riley, but call me Ghost.”

He shook your hand with a firm grip. Hazel and e/c eyes met, both hidden in the shadows of a mask. He caught a glimpse of your spirit in the e/c shade and noted that the skin around your eyes was also hidden behind black makeup.

“Nice to meet you, Lieutenant.”

Fuck, he thought when he realized that he could gaze directly into your eyes without lifting or lowering his head. 

And bloody fucking hell, he thought when he realized that in a very strange way he found that mask of yours attractive. Like you were mirroring him, like you two belonged together, like you were meant to be his and he was meant to be yours. 

There were not many things that Ghost found immediately attractive upon meeting someone. 

He considered himself to be more of a “character”-person than someone who cared about appearances first but there were some things that just drew him in...

Pretty smiles for example. Or the hint of a strong character in one’s eyes. But what really invited his immediate attraction was what Soap had called the most surprising and strangest thing ever when he accidentally spilt this piece of information during one of their long scouting sessions; when someone was just as tall as him.

There was just something about someone being his height that created a spark in his chest. 

“That’s a fucking kink” Soap had said back then. Looking at you now and considering the growing feeling in his chest, the scot might have been right.

He let go of your hand before he was holding onto it for too long but he kept his eyes on you even when you had already turned towards Soap to shake his hand.

“Sergeant John Mactavish, but call me Soap.” 

The sergeant shook your hand enthusiastically and grinned from ear to ear. He glanced at him and Ghost’s alarm went off in his head.

“You have pretty long legs eh? How tall exactly are you?”

You blinked and Ghost couldn’t stop himself from groaning inwardly when he saw slight confusion and annoyance in your eyes. 

“Roughly 6′3 if I remember correctly.”

Soap looked at him but Ghost ignored the stare deliberately and when Alejandro told them to follow him, you immediately turned away from them and hurried to fall into the colonel’s and Rodolfo’s step.

“Oh dios, lo dijo.” Rodolfo said and laughed and Ghost cursed himself for not learning more Spanish on the way here when you groaned. He was about 99% sure this was about your interaction just now.

"¿Dijo que?" Alejandro asked, his voice now lower as they moved closer to the houses, weapons raised.

"Una de las tres cosas que Y/N odia a que le pregunte.¿’Por qué Chryso como apodo’? ¿’Por qué llevas una máscara’? y ¿’Qué tan alte eres’?”

Rodolfo muttered and while the colonel laughed quietly you only sighed.

Ghost didn’t understand what exactly was going on but based on the mocking tone Rodolfo used for his last few words, it was probably something bad. He also mentioned your call sign and he was smart enough to know that the conversation was most likely about them. 

As much as it bothered him, they had already reached the stone wall so he turned his attention to the mission at hand.

“Where’s Hassan?” he asked.

“White two-story building at the back”, Alejandro replied and two seconds later they entered the gate and he didn’t have time anymore to think about your height, nor your skull mask that seemed to compliment his own and the fact that your utility straps nicely showed off your thighs. 

-

But all these thoughts and much more rushed through his mind after he had helped you out of the river. 

It had already been hard for him to breathe with his mask but your experience with yours had been much worse, the cloth wasn’t exactly made for missions involved with water and you - in your words “almost got waterboarded back there”. 

Added to the harsh landing in the river and the bullet graze on your left arm, you weren’t exactly feeling your best and you felt exhausted for a moment, so much so that you had to drag your limbs out of the water when it was your turn. 

The soldier in front of you turned around and you looked up at him from your cowering position where you had temporarily bandaged your wound.

Ghost offered you his hand and you took it. 

“Thanks” you huffed and he pulled you up with more force than necessary which messed with your balance and made you take a step forward. 

He could see a waterdroplet on the tip of your eyelashes and his heart stuttered when he noticed how close you two suddenly were. Your loud breathing made his ears tingle and he took a step back, though not letting go of your hand. 

“You good, Chryso?”, he asked, ignoring his imagination where you were panting for a different reason. Jesus Christ, you were injured. And he hadn’t even seen your face yet.

You nodded and he let go of your, pointing at your left arm. 

“I’ll bandage your arm in the car, that wrap is a sad excuse of first aid.” 

You huffed in annoyance but he saw how your eyes turned into slight halfmoons again, showing him that you were actually smiling.

“Whatever, lieutenant.”

You walked past him, waving your hand in dismissal and he followed you, a small grin on his lips, definitely not sneaking a glance at that ass in those wet black cargo pants. 

-

“I’m really curious... What kind of muppet name is Chryso?”

Alejandro snorted. “Y dale.”

You sighed beside Ghost while he secured the re-wrapped bandage. Soap looked at you through the front mirror.

“We had this guy in my unit, Turner, he was a huge biology nerd. When he first met me, he just said ‘Chrysocyon brachyurus’  which is the scientific name for the maned wolf in South America.”

Soap tilted his head in confusion when Alejandro laughed. “Okay...?”

The colonel tapped the steering wheel. “They have really long legs, hermano. Really long.”

#call of duty #call of duty modern warfare II #modern warfare II #modern warfare 2022 #simon riley #simon ghost riley #ghost #ghost x reader #ghost x gender neutral reader #simon riley x reader #simon riley x gender neutral reader #reader #soldier reader #141!reader #special forces reader #taskforce 141 #john mactavish #john soap mactavish #soap #captain price #john price #kyle gaz garrick #gender neutral reader #fem reader #male reader

[tibby-art]

your grian is also what i strive to look like as a transmasc how has this happened to two separate people

anyways does your grian design just not care about gender roles and presents however she wants or do you not draw her more feminine since transfem grian isn’t the major head canon to avoid confusion?

i like learning about people’s lgbtq head canons XD

i think she just presents how she wants, yeah! i imagine she mostly wears more gender-neutral clothing like… sweaters, collared shirts, sweaters over collared shirts, lol. which is basically what most people’s grian designs already wear, i just enjoy exploring that character design concept in a slightly different direction i suppose? im certainly not the first person to hc grian as transfem, but i think for me it started when one day my friend sent me a drawing of grian i had done and joked that it looked just like our other friend who is transfem. it was funny bc it was true, but it made me realize i had a lot more fun drawing grian when i thought of the character as being transfem lol.

so as for why my grian isn’t super feminine, i think it’s also just because a lot of trans people i know personally tend to present similarly (that being, dressing more gender-neutral and not really worrying about gender stereotypes). that’s not to say all trans people present this way of course, just that i know a few folks that do! so i guess i enjoy drawing a character that reminds me of those around me. alternatively i know lots of transmasc people who enjoy dressing feminine as well and so on. for full disclosure i’m a trans man myself, so i don’t want to pretend i know everything about the transfem experience specifically, but i can at least relate to the trans experience overall o7

either way it makes me really happy that trans people on all wavelengths have been sending me messages saying that my grian gives them gender envy LOL. it’s really unexpected since i don’t draw grian as often as cub or scar for example, but it’s still really appreciated nonetheless :’)

#hope this makes sense sorry for the long response #asks

[tubborucho]

Something I think people are missing when they talk about the whole Day 12 thing with Tubbo and Bad is that Tubbo is just like that sometimes, especially with people he’s close to. Depending on how you look at it that's not necessarily better or worse, but I think it’s an important factor because so much of the recent BBH Purgatory discussion is about how he’s singled out and that’s something Tubbo would do to anyone. He’ll get a minor irritation stuck in his head just as hard as a major problem and then refuse to let it go. The amount of ranting he does isn’t always an accurate measure of how important it is to him and “I’m still on this” (or any variation) is practically his catchphrase. I’m not trying to downplay in-character analysis, it’s a trait of both streamer and character, but it’s something you might not realize if you don’t watch Tubbo very often.

Yeah, this is also a part of it. Tubbo is very passionate about things, and sometimes those things are minor grudges that he gets stuck on for no good reason just because it’s fun for him to get annoyed at them and rant. But this is more of a cc! part of things than in character one (tho all of Tubbo’s characters also have this trait more or less).

For me, I really think it’s because Tubbo is very frustrated with the Day 12 itself, and out of everything that went wrong Bad dying is the only concrete moment he can single out. Because Quackity dying doesn’t really count in lore because he wasn’t there really (which is such bullshit btw, this is my Day 12 Roman Empire, Quackity’s death SHOULDN’T have influenced the percentage) and anyone else wasn’t there either to do the quests, for objective irl reason, so q!Tubbo also can’t really be mad at them and also who would he be mad with out of everyone on the team absent? All of them? Choose a specific person?

Meanwhile Bad was there and he died after doing something Tubbo told him not to (note: this is neutral, I am not discussing right now the moment itself and how justified Bad going in was). So it’s a concrete thing that he can blame on the percentage loss without it being meta or ‘why are you mad at me and not the others who did the same’. And it was really hard emotionally day for him, the combination of cc!Tubbo (well, q!Tubbo too but for the sake of the point we will count it as more of a cc! trait) being very competitive and q!Tubbo genuinely believing that Soulfire is cursed and that they absolutely must win this day to tie (I am pretty sure he believed it was the last day that counts? But I might be wrong) or (later) to win the Purgatory and save all the Eggs (which was his one and only goal truly, he was really clear about not straying from it even when it felt that a lot of characters forgot what it’s all for). So he singled Bad out and concentrated on it as the sole reason they lost Day 12, seething.

Now, for cc!Tubbo it’s mostly a bit, even if he acts genuinely ’not over this’, he is just having fun. And q!Tubbo may still have this grudge, but overall it does not outweigh his newfound comradery with Bad and respect for him. But q!Tubbo is also very much a Negative Nancy, he LOVES to just rant about stuff that ‘annoys’ him and get on his friends nerves. Like he find a thing and just keeps pushing it (ex: Bagi’s ‘incest’ tendencies, everything concerning Fitpac, Phil’s age and a lot of other stuff, Foolish and ‘you made it awkward now’, etc) and Day 12 is his thing for Bad along with cursing/inappropriate jokes.

Do I think it’s fair to q!Bad? When /srs – no; when /lh – yes, because it’s funny. Do I think it can count as an example of how people keep blaming Bad for everything about Purgatory? Yes. Do I think it’s actually the same as with other characters? Not at all.

All the other prominent negative after-Purgatory characterizations of Bad are concentrated on him being a bloodthirsty monster that terrorized everyone (only partially true and definitely not unique to his character). Meanwhile Tubbo never really talked about Bad being a ‘monster’ in Purgatory (afterwards) in any negative light as far as I remember, it was always very neutral. Or at least not blaming him for it. His grudge is a completely my teammate did a dumb thing so I will forever remind him it. Which tho still unfair is not hypocritical when what other characters do.

Obviously this is just my take on the situation, everyone can perceive it a bit differently, especially because I am writing this as a Tubbo main, so my view on things is skewed towards him.

#liss writes posts #qsmp #liss answers asks #qsmp badboyhalo #qsmp tubbo #soul sacrificers

[goldentlme]

i’m searching for you in my fading memories .

alternate versions .

whooh . WHOOH !!!!! good GOD !!!!

listen to the song linked while looking I think it really adds . look up a translation too if you want ! listen to the entire lies of p ost in fact . its fucking fantastic .

NOTES .

in april 2022 , i drew a fanmade book cover for the danganronpa x reader fic Sleep Awake . in december of 2023 i redesigned my reader for that story for the third time and thought it appropriate to redraw that old cover with their new design . and yesterday , january 13th 2024 , i finished that bitch . View the fruits of my labour .

in my last Notes section i talked about nerfing the lighting . well um . i nerfed it again . i dont know if it was fate or if i just . idk . didnt want to but i axed both original concepts - the yellow overhead light ( mostly) , and the light blue under light - and just Winged the fuck outta it . that ' mostly ' means that the light source is Still overhead but i just took the colour out to make it more neutral .

another thing i brought up were the shelves and how i wanted to add more items to them . I did it this time , but not to the extent that i really wanted to . i'd hoped for more Clutter and ultimately couldnt think of anymore than a few items . SAID ITEMS BEING !!!!

the pills . self explanatory , since they haunted the majority of cases 2 and 3 .

chess pieces . cute little reference to the chess scene ! even if the scene itself didnt feature real chess pieces , the imagery wouldnt work if i didnt use real pieces .

the letter opener . dont need to explain this one . but i Did originally plan to have it in shin's hand ( explaining why that one is balled like that , because there was originally a Thing in there ) but i couldnt figure out how to draw it and make it look Good . i only added it back when i was colouring the trinkets on the shelves and realised that i Forgot to put it back into the drawing .

the joker card in the bottom corner . also shouldnt have to explain this one .

LITTLE DETAILS I THINK YOU SHOULD LOOK AT .

THE HANDS !!!!!!!!! i decided at the very last second to make them vaguely see through . and theyre all a persons ! amami and shinguji are the obvious ones , but the two holding at the top are supposed to be ouma ( on the scarf ) and akamatsu ( on the rope ) . i would have included tojo's as well but i couldnt fit it in the composition without it looking awkward and out of place and i thought there were already enough references to case 3 as is .

and you literally cant even see it but if you look REALLY closely at oumas hand . his skin is a little grey and you can see the veins through the skin . wonder what happened there . Guess we'll never know !

THE BOOKS !! did the same thing as last time with a Little More . purple books are ouma , green are both amami and tojo , blue is both kiibo and chabashira , pink is akamatsu , and red is phys themselves . i know phys's canonical colour association is olive green but consider : shin is red . look at him . hes Red . that ones for me specifically .

with that . i did all of those books by hand . i drew about 9 variations of books and copy pasted them sure but i Shaded and Coloured them all individually . youll never guess how fucking LONG that took . so yeah . no one book has the exact same shading . goodie !

THE JOKER !!! yes i know i talked about it in the previous section but i WILL talk about the card itself . because i unironically am so in love with how that drawing came out . the little guy featured there is my Lies of P oc scaramouche or scaramuccia ( i use them interchangeably ) . hes a silly jester :3 . the depiction on the card is of him in his prime , before . All Of That Happened . story-wise he's a super famous circus performer known as " The One Man Show " because all of his acts are done alone and are absolutely insane . hes very good at what he does which is Why he doesnt have a crew . and the only reason hes so good is because he't not even human , just pretending to be !

additionally , i originally planned for that joker card to be a Real Life Joker . because a little known fun fact about me is that i collect playing card decks ! but i looked and literally NONE of the ones i currently own would have fit the piece . so . yeah . i just ended up drawing darling scaramuccia . heres the full image im so chuffed

i think thats all i got for the drawing itself . i initially started this back in early december but got stuck and picked it back up a couple days ago , so its been marinating for a bit . hope we all like it ! i think its Better than the original . THE SERIOUS STUFF .

its so fucking insane to think that its been almost 2 years . not only have i truly rediscovered my love of reader insert fanfiction after so many years unable to even think about it without feeling a little sick to my stomach , but ive made so many good friends and core memories through this fic . i even got back into writing . literally never thought id write again after my 11th grade english class and my 10th grade creative writing class . and im having FUN with it . wild .

anyways , this one goes out to vee @chihirolovebot for writing one of The Fics of all time , putting up with my insane ramblings about idol these past months ( READ SWINGING RIGHT NEOWWWW ) , and for letting me help design their dnd characters . godspeed .

it goes out to nex @nexuswrites for beating better genshin character builds into me , giving great fic recommendations , creating thief of detectives quandary fame . READ DQ ( THREAT ) !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! , and being a fellow p5 and pokemon lover . i miss the coordinator and justice

and of COURSE !!!! rei @berry-creates . the gay the myth the legend . a fellow oc haver and lover , a fantastic writer , and an overall lovely person . this one goes out to u for sharing oc playlists , playing splatoon with me , and for creating maddie . theyre a little freak and i want to study them . i love seeing u go insane over them its like enrichment for me bc i too am also a little mentally ill about them im just really good at hiding it .

theres a whole lot more i could say and more people i could talk about but this is long enough , isnt it ?

thanks for a beautiful 2 years of physouma yaoi . heres to the upcoming sleep awake case 6 , epilogue , all the future additions to the one shot book , the entire rest of dq , tfp , and sams , and more blorbos to put in the smoothie maker . this took a whole two hours to write .

cheers , boys .

song of the post .

#my art #my words #sleep awake #hen shin #danganronpa

[peacesmovingcabaret]

So what do you dislike about lumity from the owl house? It seems to be way better as a romantic subplot than most shows can do. Like there’s no wheel-spinning or dragging it out, they’re in a different place relationship wise in each episode they interact in, until they properly become a couple. No rushing into it and trying to make a dysfunctional garbage couple work, no dragging it out for an obligatory “hero getting the girl” ending.

(Sorry for the late response. This was sitting in my inbox for a bit and I hadn’t seen it)

For starters, I don’t dislike lumity. I’m neutral at best, indifferent at worst.

Though I admit I kinda liked it back in season one. The popular, elitist witch developing a crush on the human girl who mysteriously shows up on the isles was a cute concept.

But by season 2, I was losing interest. Suddenly it feels like Amity’s entire personality was just devoted to being Luz’s girlfriend. Also doesn’t help that almost the entire foundation of their relationship is built on Luz’s hyper fixation with her Azura book. If not for that there would be no relationship.

Then by season 3, I’m over them. Amity has been pretty much reduced to Luz’s love interest. All manner of personality that set her apart in the beginning mostly dissolved. And Lumity was just “queer rep in a kids show”.

And I’m gonna have to disagree with you on that one thing. This is VERY rushed. We get a small amount of build up to Amity’s developing feelings towards Luz, however Luz kinda just jumps into it. We don’t get her inner thoughts, don’t get her questioning her feelings or exploring her attraction. It’s just, “Hey Amity likes me, we should start dating!” And then that’s what happens. I know people hate when writers drag out romances when we already know that they’re gonna end up together. But sometimes it’s okay to give your characters time to grow before making them into a couple.

And it’s not just Lumity, pretty much all the canon romances on this show suffers the same writing problem. Only difference is, Lumity is the main ship so it gets more screen time.

Now obviously there are gonna be people who don’t feel the same way and will disagree with me. That’s fine. I didn’t make this post to tell people that they’re wrong for liking it or that they don’t understand it. I just wanted to get my input.

And honestly, I feel the same way about a majority of romances in a lot of cartoons. So I’m not singling Lumity out.

#toh critical #lumity critical #I think that’s the right tag #the owl house

[ephemerensis]

Here You’re Safe // Joel Miller x GN! Reader

another platonic gender neutral dad joel moment. TRIGGER WARNING DEATH like of a major character please proceed with caution !!! anyways this took me so long skkshd and the ending is rushed and rlly bad im sorry its 2 am :/ not proofread ALSO!! if i published a poetry book would yall read it :/

—

“Anything bad down there?” Ellie jutted a finger towards an empty hall, lined with lockers.

Outside, the wind screamed its grievances, making the old building creak whenever a particularly cruel gust swept by. It was winter in the middle of the country, and as much as the three of you adored the idea of camping outside, the snow violently pouring from the skies argued otherwise.

Thankfully, Joel found a school building nearby before the storm. A high school, it looked like. On the way in, you saw traces of the treacherous cordyceps roots intertwining through the doorway and walls. But you didn’t have much of a choice with the weather, and they were dry. Hardly anyone lived in the area to get infected anyways, and winter seemed to slow them down; the infected. Not the fungi itself. It grew just fine. Thrived even, in colder climates.

“Just you.” You bit back a chortle as Ellie scrunched her nose, almost peeved.

“You know that joke gets fucking old, Joel. I’m not even in there yet.”

The burly man just shrugged, adjusting his rifle strap as he slowed his steps to a halt, “isn’t a joke.”

“He can’t help it, he’s like eighty. Can’t teach an old dog new tricks,” You shrugged your pack off your shoulders, setting it on the floor to get situated for the time being. The man just grunted in response, glancing around the building before taking a seat at one of the long tables that littered the room. They were askew; clearly a struggle took place there sometime, but judging by the copious amount of dust that coated the place it couldn’t have been all too recent. Joel was sure it was clear, otherwise they would’ve heard you by now. The school wasn’t all that large after all.

“Whatever,” piped Ellie, rolling her eyes. She reached for your sleeve, tugging you towards the hall. “Cmon! I wanna explore a little!” Giggling, you let her lead you off, throwing a glance back to Joel before the two of you rounded the corner. His brows were deep set, almost furrowed above his eyes, as they usually were; but he looked about as relaxed as you imagined the man could manage.

“Hey!” he called after you. “It’s mostly dry, but you watch your step, understand? Haven’t cleared it completely.”

The two of you hardly heard him, though, distracted instead by the rows of little blue locked cabinets you’d only read about in passing. A lot of the world before was a wonder after growing up in the QZ. It felt like rediscovering a myth.

“This is so fucking cool!” Ellie ran her hand along a row of them, rattling the metal doors against their frame. It was a wonder they weren’t rusted after all these years, but they seemed almost untouched if not a little dusty.

“Didn’t you go to high school? In the QZ?” You didn’t get to. Before Joel and Tess you were a well kept secret, and after that didn’t change much either. They’d let you out as you pleased after awhile but you never went to school; ‘don’t need to be feeding you FEDRA propaganda,’ so they homeschooled you instead. Mostly Tess. Joel quipped in every now and then but he didn’t usually have the best wisdom to impart onto you. Aside from bedtime novels, that was always his specialty.

“Yeah but it was tiny. Just a gym and some classrooms.” Ellie had her head under a drinking fountain, staring at the pipes as she mashed the button. “This stuff is so metal, literally. It’s like your own little room at school!” Abandoning the fountain when no water emerged, she turned her attention back to the paint chipped lockers, “you think they left shit in here?”

“Like corny love letters maybe,” you tugged on one of locks to test it. It didn’t budge, as you’d assumed. Thoughts of life before were so enigmatic. They were more scared of the math test next class then when their next meal was gonna be. It almost made you jealous. It would if they weren’t probably dead. Better to grow up in hell then suddenly get thrust into it.

Behind you, metal squeaked as Ellie got one of them open, “Oh shit! Wait wait wait, Y/N check me out!” You turned around, lips pursed together in a crooked smile when you saw her. She’d found someone’s baseball cap and sunnies. Ellie flipped the bill back and slipped the sunglasses on, forcing a deeper voice as she swaggered in your direction. “Yooo what’s up bro, you going to my place tonight? Throwing a huge party!”

She pressed her hand into the locker, beside your head, leaning in. The moment your eyes locked eyes behind her darkened frames you both burst into laughter. Shaking your head, you took on a dumb expression before replicating her tone, “man, is Britney gonna be there? She’s a total babe!”

Ellie snorted, sending you both into another fit of toe curling laughter. It was all so absurd. You pushed off the locker when you’d regained your bearings, walking backwards as you tugged on the locks to see if any would pop.

“Is that really how they talked back then?”

Ellie shrugged, tugging on locks on the opposite wall as the two of you ventured forth. “Gotta be, that’s how it is in books.”

One of the locks you tugged on gave way, making you grin as you pried it open. Pulling out a binder, you thumbed through the pages before a little booklet caught your attention.

“Here, catch!” She caught it with ease as you tossed the comic book over.

“No way! Batman!” Ellie flipped through the pages with fervor, pausing in her pursuit down the hall. You, however, continued slowly wandering backwards.

You giggled, shaking your head at her glee.

A sickening crunch wiped the smile off your face.

Ellie gasped, staring at you with wide eyes as you muffled a scream. Looking down towards the source of the noise, you see it.

The semblance of a hand disintegrated under your foot. The body it belonged to seemingly dried out long ago, pressed flat against the wall of lockers it clung to.

The both of you stared a moment, as you slowly backed away in relief. Until you saw the tendrils lurking in the undergrowth, reaching towards you. Worse still, the rumbling sound that suddenly emerged from the upper floor made you blood run cold.

Shit.

Ellie saw it too, bolting first but you were quick to follow.

“Joel!” You called, turning the corner, almost colliding with him. “We have to run!”

“Y/N! Ellie! What’s going on?” The man was already ready, bags slung over his shoulder with a look of bewilderment embedded on his features.

Ellie pushed Joel forward, “Not fucking dry!” The three of you ran, making your way back the way you came. The thundering sounds of footsteps hitting hardwood grew nearer. Joel lead the way, rounding every corner with his shotgun raised.

“Why didn’t they hear us when we came in?” You choked out in a panicked whisper. Normally they came bolting at any noise you offered.

“It’s winter, were probably huddled to keep the hosts alive. Mushrooms can take the cold, but the bodies can’t.” Joel whispered back. The timbre in his voice was almost enough to soothe you, he sounded more tired than distressed as he pressed on.

“What do we do?” Ellie piped.

“Gotta get outta here first.” The three of you cleared another corner, sprinting down a hall. A violent thud against one of the classroom doors made you lose your footing, sending you plummeting towards the ground. You gasped as three runners pounded aggressively against the door, piling and clawing at the ancient thing long enough for the rusted hinges to give way.

“Shit!” Somewhere out of the corner of your eye you see Ellie pull out a knife as the three infected tumbled forward. They piled on top of each other, all scrambling to gain their footing and lunge at the nearest person in the room; you. You shuffled panickedly backwards, working to get up and kick the topmost one off your leg.

Ellie stabs one in the head, making the arm fall limp and successively freeing you. You managed to stand upright, the other two still clawing but trapped under the weight of the first. Joel fires a bullet, ceasing another one’s movement as they three of you back away from them.

Before he can shoot the third, the rumbling gets louder.

You’re all sprinting before you can fully gain your bearings. The burn in your lungs was starting to settle in, but the echos of clicks and groans mixed with the pummeling of foot steps filling the halls kept you motivated. Your heart beat so quickly in your chest, you thought it might burst out.

The doors leading out were in sight, though. The wind that bashed against it was less than inviting, but beyond that— the worn mahogany didn’t budge when you shoved. Ellie reached it first, nearly falling as she bodied the double doors. The snow must’ve piled up outside.

A glance and a nod were all you needed before the three of you charged against it unanimously. Once. The doors shook and the sound resounded, seemingly worsening the agitation of the horde heading your way. A second charge made it squeak open, the biting wind flaying your skin as it made contact. The first of the infected rounded the corner, running at you full force before you’d managed a third charge against the doors.

They burst open, giving way to a powerful gust that hit you like a wall. Joel made sure you both got out before he followed, pressing against the wind to get away.

The infected fared worse. Clickers wouldn’t be able to hear with all this noise, and runners couldn’t manage to fight the wind. Most of then fell behind, the few that persisted did so slowly; sinking perpetually deeper in the plush snow in their pursuit.

Fighting against the biting currents of the frigid wind, the three of you paved a way into the tree line. Immersed in forest, the storm felt better. The trees blocked off some of the wind to an extent, and as far as you were concerned no infected seemed to have tagged along thus far.

The ache in your bones was starting to settle as the storm did. You were deep in the woods by then, no sense of direction or time— but with the way the moon hung so high in the sky it couldn’t have been close to daybreak. Joel slowed to a halt, nodding at both of you before you and Ellie breathed a collective sigh.

Ellie dropped her bag to the ground, almost falling over. Your knees felt a surge of weakness too. The snow looked so soft you could sleep in it. You bent forward, heaving, hands on your knees. If you were born before the whole thing went down the cardio alone would’ve been enough to kill you, it was much better to be born into the apocalypse, you decided.

Thankfully you didn’t leave too much behind. A sleeping bag and more cans of food than you would’ve liked were lost, but you’d find more food and you had two sleeping bags still.

Everything settled enough for you to hear again. Between gasps of breath you could hear the crickets chirping. It was almost tranquil.

Ellie seemed the first to recover, standing up and stretching her arms overhead before stilling. She stared ahead at nothing in particular, cogs processing the monstrosity you’d just escaped.

“That was fucking brutal.”

You looked up to offer a laugh. Her dry humor in times like these were enough to send you into orbit sometimes; but that was when you saw it.

The lone stalker that lurched for her before you could yell a warning. Before you could think you reacted. Grabbing Ellie by her collar, you yanked her forward and out of its path.

Instead, if collided with your arms pushing against its chest with all the force you had left in you to muster. It was stronger, of course, knocking you down almost immediately as it clawed at you. You screamed as it opened its mouth, long tendrils extending themselves towards you, wriggling morosely.

Ellie was still in the thralls of scrambling up, but Joel took notice. A well aimed bullet made it collapse. Joel rushed to help haul it off you as you screamed from the pure terror and adrenaline coursing through your veins, clamoring as far away from it as your shaken body could manage.

He looked at you with a concern you hardly recognized, not that you even looked to see it. Everyone was still a moment until Ellie said your name.

“Y/N…” she said it uncharacteristically nervously, a shaky finger pointed towards the shining red that stained the snow beneath your palm.

You raised your hand to your face, barely able to see in the moonlight, but the indentations of teeth on your marred flesh was unmistakable.

Ironically, your veins felt icier than the frost covered leaves as you stared at it; shell shocked.

This was never supposed to happen. You’d always made it through before, why now? Not you. It could never have been you.

Ellie fell to her knees, fists bunching the fabric of your shirt as she shook you, tears in her eyes threatening to fall. “Y/N what the fuck! Why’d you do that!”

“No. No no no,” you murmured.

“I’m immune!” She was screaming at you now. “I’m fucking immune! I would’ve been—“

The older man cut her off, pushing her hands off you but not with more force than was enough to make her release her grip. He looked at you with the same shock that gripped your eyes. His hands hovered you, hesitant, but the gentle movement broke your stupor. Looking up at him you quivered under the weight of it all, “Joel.”

He looked at you with something you couldn’t quite grasp. It was pity and shock and hurt and all of it but none of it. Somewhere in the confines of his empathy and loving was a deep rooted instinct to compartmentalize. What was done was done. But you needed him now. The bullet was shot, but the dust hadn’t settled.

“Joel, I’m so scared.” Tears were already streaming, and you knew he couldn’t do anything about it; both of you knew. But as his weighty arms wrapped taut around your shoulders, it was good enough a cure. You inhaled, letting his familiar burnt wood settle in your lungs as it’d done a thousand times before.

“Shh, shh. I know baby, I know.” His hand pat rhythmically against your spine.

It’s over. It’s really over.

That’s all you could think. Behind Joel, Ellie just stared silently. It wasn’t out of anger or guilt or even pity. None of these things ever seemed real, and the three of you had been doing this together for so long. You’d survived so much of it all, and she was the cure. The hopeless, helpless cure. What else could she do?

“Hey, hey, hey. It’s okay. You’re okay.” Joel wasn’t one to sugarcoat or lie. So often he said so little, every morsel of information or sentimentality you could pry from him felt more satisfying than a warm shower on a cold day. Maybe it wasn’t because he didn’t know what else to say. You were in hysterics and at the end after all.

But it felt true.

Your hand throbbed, but not more than the feeling of the ache in your bones— something you’d gotten used to after years of running. The air was stiller than it was before, it didn’t hold the bite of bitter wind it had moments earlier. In fact, after all the snow, it felt clear and crisp in your lungs. The birds cooed their grievances to the world overhead, never ceasing their song even in the middle of night. And the stars were so beautifully bright, it was enough to feel enveloped. Here, in this moment, in Joel’s arms, you were okay.

He’d only pulled you closer, almost swaying you with him as he kept the rhythm of his hand against your spine. You could hear how fast his heartbeat, “You remember that toy rabbit you had as a kid? What was his name? Pete? Peter?”

“Percy,” you whispered after a while. Rabbit was a strong word to describe it. It might’ve looked like one before, but by time it got to you it was anything but. Discarded and trampled on as people rampaged out of cities and infectious conjunctions. It was a mottled gray little thing, with an ear and both eyes missing. The other ear consistently found itself, for the better half of five years, securely grasped in your little hands. Regardless, you loved it. You named it the way you would’ve named a real rabbit, if you could’ve had one before all this. You held it the way you would imagine your parents held you, before all this.

“Yeah that’s right,” his chest vibrated against the side of your face as he chuckled. “You used to carry him everywhere, didn’t you? Thought you were gonna kill me when I took him to wash. Would holler bloody murder, it was a wonder the neighbors never complained.”

The wind settled earlier with the storm, and eventually so did the pace of your heartbeat. You smiled at the memory, strangely bashful. It’s almost an insult to Joel and Tess to say Percy was all you had. They gave you food, shelter, company on some days. But for the first few years he was all you had. He was promised and he was yours. Percy was the first you could ever call your own. It felt often like he was all you had. Especially on nights when the two of them were on runs, and the Fireflies would stir fights against FEDRA outside. Percy shielded you from the sounds of gunshot then.

“Course eventually you outgrew him; which was never bad! Used to get jealous of how often you’d hug it and not your old man.” He sounded wistful. You calmed down enough to pull back, now suffering from a bout of hiccups and sniffles as you tried to regain your bearings. Joel didn’t let you go, though. You stayed in his arms. You couldn’t bring yourself to respond, offering a small smile in its place.

How could he be jealous of a silly little rabbit? Percy was all you thought you had then. But you knew better. Joel was all you had ever. He was all you would ever have again.

“Then there was that kid, down the street. Darwin or something?”

Damian. An awkward, lanky, 8 year old boy, with sand colored hair that never lay flat and a tooth that was perpetually missing. Of course, you were 9 at the time and you didn’t want to play with “little kids.”

Joel really sucked with names. You knew that. He was getting on in his years, but even when he was younger— they never stuck for him. People were untrustworthy and irrelevant, it was hard to want to try. So it meant a lot anyways when he halfway blundered the names of your childhood acquaintances. To you what was so fleeting was important enough for him to commit to memory, as cold as he could be. You never thought he’d cared so much.

“Brought you sidewalk daisies for months! Damn near ripped his head off, was about fed up with his yapping and stammering around you.” You smiled at that. Damian’s crush on you was so annoying then, but sometimes on longer days you’d wished someone would love you with the same persistence— even if it was a silly boy a year younger than you. “But you were always pretty, anyone could see it. No one will ever be good enough, though. Or, would be.”

Joel said the last part almost as a whisper. It felt like a death sentence, though you all knew there was no hope for you. A silence settled over your heads, you could feel it in your lungs as you inhaled the air that felt so crisp and clean and clear. Lungs that were still alive and well.

It would be dawn soon. And they had to go. The world was cold and bitter; they needed to get to shelter and then continue to their agenda. They. Joel and Ellie.

And when they went your lungs would still work, and you still breathe in clean crisp air. But they wouldn’t be breathing for you.

So, pulling far enough away from Joel to look him in the eyes you plead wordlessly. They darted between his, begging him to understand their request and praying for him to accept it.

It took a moment, confusion crossed his face before it dawned on him. Though he should’ve known what you wanted.

He shook his head, holding your gaze. It was a cruel thing to ask. To want. How could he when he raised you? When he loved you?

But you just nodded. He had to. It was all you wanted. So the two of you just looked at each other and pleaded. You knew you were going to win. Joel always yielded for you.

Your eyes shifted for a moment to lock with Ellie’s, offering her a small smile. She looked confused, looking between you and Joel as the pieces started to fall into place.

You looked back to Joel again, wrapping your arms around him and hugging him for the last time. Your eyes fell shut and you felt him squeeze you back. It was so warm here.

“Love you, Dad.”

You were safe here.

And that’s the last thing you knew before he pulled the trigger.

—

likes and reblogs appreciated !!

#joel miller x reader #tlou angst #angst #tlou fanfiction #ellie x reader #joel miller comfort #joel miller x female reader #joel miller x gender neutral reader #joel miller x male reader

[cowboyjen68]

Hi Jen,

I hope this finds you well. I’m sixteen and I’m seeking advice. I am mostly feminine, but in the last year I’ve become increasingly uncomfortable with that, which has given me a sense of whiplash. I’ll be perfectly fine wearing a skirt and revealing top one moment, and then feel like I want to jump out of my skin the next. I know it’s normal to not have all the answers at my age, but it doesn’t make it any less frustrating.

I live in a progressive city and was raised in a relatively accepting home, but I still struggle with my identity and have a hard time feeling comfortable with the word “gay.” I’m out to a few friends (some straight and some LGBT), but I still feel so alone. This, of course, makes me feel awful, because I recognize what a privileged situation I am in compared to a lot of lesbians, and I feel as though I “should” be more accepting of myself, i.e. I end up feeling guilty because I feel bad. Plus I’m all jumbled up about masculinity vs feminity… the point is, I could really use some advice from an older lesbian. I don’t know any of those in real life (actually, now that I think about it, I’m not sure that I know *any* lesbians at all in my personal life, which is pretty sad), and that makes it hard to envision any type of future for myself.

Thank you for your thoughts <3

It always makes me sad to read that young lesbians don't know any older ones in real life because I remember how isolating that felt. It was definitely one of the reasons I struggled so hard to be even just neutral about my sexuality and why I misunderstood being butch for so many years.

The butch/femme and masc/feminine discourse has gotten a bit out of control in large part due to the internet and social media. If you don't have real life intergenerational connections it can feel like ALL lesbians are on one side or the other of a very black and white line and that is just not the reality of real life.

I would say the majority of lesbians are "garden variety" or in the "comfy" zone of neither butch nor femme or neither masc or feminine. Just women who are lesbians and exist on the human level of having characteristics that are both stereotypical and non stereotypical as far as what culture assigns to us based on sex. Even butches and femmes do no necessarily check all the “boxes” the world thinks we should. 

My lesbians friends who are not butch or femme are comfortable in a wide range of clothing and hair cuts and it just depends on what suits them at the moment. Once we get a little experience under our belts out in the world we seem to learn to wear what is both comfortable and utilitarian without worrying about the perception of the outside world. When it comes to dressing up for an occasion like a date or an event I wear what makes ME feel best and while still balancing that with what I think women might find me attractive in.  I think it is a normal, common thought process shared with most other humans. We can choose what makes us feel good and still want to look good for others, especially other women. 

 I can assure you that, all jokes aside, no one can take your lesbian card for clothing choices, hair cuts or any other aesthetics. Your sexual orientation is what makes you a lesbian. Everything else is just being human.  Don’t mistake the community or experiences you might share (or not share) with other lesbians as a requirement of your lesbianism. Those are perks but not necessary. 

If you were sitting in your lawn chair by a fire pit with a variety of other lesbians you would hear many stories about how we struggled with being okay with our sexual orientation and it is not necessarily dependent on any support or lack thereof that we received. While an aggressively negative or anti homosexual home life, family or religious background can certainly make accepting ourselves much harder, even those of us whose family and friends were neutral or supportive had internal obstacles to overcome. 

Few humans are free from the affects of the outside world, even before social media. In my youth, movies, tv, magazine and my peer group all had some backwards ideas about what being a lesbian is and applied incorrect moral ideals to it.   I had to put in the work myself for many years to come to terms with being same sex attracted in a world that attached negativity to such relationships. Once I had lesbian friends, especially older ones I saw hope in my future. 

You are okay just as you are. Your personality, aesthetic choices and hobbies do not have any affect on your sexual attraction and orientation so be you, enjoy what you like and be honest with yourself about what kind of woman you want to love and be loved by. 

I hope you find some lesbian friends of many ages. In the meantime my tiktok might help you see that lesbian life can be full of happiness, friendships and variety. 

#intergenerational lesbians #lesbians

[shadowron]

The Dwarven Decker, a better Dwarf Archetype for Shadowrun (1st Edition)

Wiz art by @skullchicken

In case you haven’t heard, the current managers of the Shadowrun IP, Catalyst Game Labs, announced that they will be reprinting 1st Edition Shadowrun.

Told ya, chummer.

My feelings on this are surprisingly neutral – I already own a couple of hardcopies and so I don’t feel the need to buy it a third time. I’m mostly curious to see what kind of editing they do; after all, even the 1st edition book went through several printings. In addition to some lingering purely typographical errors...

Which made it into my print copy of 2nd edition.

...to editing errors...

The undescribed and elusive Program Enabler was subsequently copied and pasted in the Street Samurai Catalog.

These make sense to fix – they don’t substantively change the game at all. Some did – for instance the underpriced power focus that led to an Instant Death Spell loophole. This was fixed in the 1st edition magic sourcebook The Grimoire.

But then there were a myriad of things that saw changes from 1st to 2nd edition, some of the major ones being:

Damage codes moving to a standard staging of 2

Updated automatic fire rules (which came before 2nd Edition, in the Rigger Black Book)

Addition of Physical Adepts to the core magic rules

But the one I’m going to exploit in this build today is: in 1st edition, there was no cap on the amount of active or storage memory that an off-the-shelf cyberdeck could carry.

Admittedly, this doesn’t sound as exciting as smearing some Aztechnology corpcop across the side of their Pyramid with a Force 21 Mana Dart, but it does greatly increase the ability and versatility of a decker, and maybe shortening some of those Matrix runs which traditionally take as long as a papal election.

So sayeth Pope Elihu I

In the description of how a cyberdeck’s active memory (here called onboard memory, in perhaps another editing flub), there is the sentence:

In real life, there is a limit to how much RAM you can have for a particular computer build. This, like power foci and autofire, was fixed before 2nd Edition was published, as Virtual Realities set a maximum Active Memory of 50 Mp per point of MPCP, but for our purposes here…

What this means is that: our Dwarven Decker here will be able to buy a copy of every possible utility program (there are 13 of them) at Rating 6 and run them simultaneously without having to worry about swapping between Storage and Active Memory. Essentially rendering the Load property of the deck useless.

Attributes:

Body: 4 Quickness: 5 Strength: 3 Charisma: 2 Intelligence: 5 Willpower: 4 Essence: 5.3 Reaction: 5

Skills:

Computer: 6 Computer (B/R): 3 Computer Theory: 6 Etiquette (Street): 3 Firearms: 2

Cyberware:

Datajack Headware Telephone

Gear:

Armor Jacket Fuchi-Cyber 4 (Response Increase 2, Active Memory 550 Mp, Storage Memory 1000 Mp) Programs (All at Rating 6): Bod, Evasion, Masking, Sensors, Analyze, Attack, Browse, Deception, Decrypt, Evaluate, Medic, Mirrors, Relocate, Shield, Sleaze, Slow, Smoke Walther Palm Pistol (Concealable Holster, 20 rounds normal ammo)

Contacts:

Dwarf Technician Elven Decker Fixer Gang Boss

#shadowrun #catalyst game labs #dwarf #decker #cyberpunk

[it-happened-one-fic]

Ghostly Happenings - Silver (Part 4)

Author Notes: Tis finally complete! This is the fourth and final section of my Halloween/October twst fic series. Much of what I said about the other three parts of this fic holds true for this one. The entire series is post Diasomnia overblot, hopefully non canon-compliant, and was greatly inspired by the 1947 movie "The Ghost and Mrs. Muir." I also listened to "Freaking Me Out" by Ava Max while writing this fic series. As per usual, reader is gender-neutral. I hope you enjoy!

Type: Gender-neutral reader/ Ghost AU/ noncanon compliant/ Post Diasomnia overblot/ tad bit of angst with comfort/ fluff/ romance implied/ pining

Word Count: 1619

{Part 1}, {Part 2}, {Part 3}, {Part 4: You're Here!}

Also available on AO3 (link deleted due to glitches)

“I’m home,” My call was met with silence that had me sighing slightly. It no doubt meant the ghosts were off doing something else around campus. Similarly, Grim was probably off harassing some students and offering to teach them some of his supposedly grandiose magic spells which may or may not result in excess cleaning for me tomorrow.

 But there was little I could do about that, and it was good for Grim to play with the students. It gave him something to do along with some much-needed social interaction. 

Even I interacted with students when I passed them in the hallway. I was pretty sure I was one of the most confusing members of the NRC staff by now. The magicless janitor, who knew a bizarre amount about overblots to the point where I sometimes called in to help with lectures.

Never a fun time.

“Welcome home,” I quite literally screamed as Silver calmly spoke from beside me, where he most definitely had not been a mere second ago.

His eyebrows rose slightly, and a flicker of something flashed across his face. Something worryingly akin to amusement as he watched me with total calm that was at odds with my startled state.

“You… Silver, don’t scare me like that!” My hands lowered from where they'd flown up towards my chest when I'd shrieked.

“Sorry,” His apology was delivered in the exact same way he said most things. Utter calm. But something about his relaxed expression and the mostly concealed smile that tugged at his lips that did not speak of apology, and I frowned slightly. Half-confused by the fact that he seemed somehow more relaxed now than he had in life.

Then he’d always seemed laidback but also incredibly focused. Like it took a great deal of effort to keep himself awake, even when he had failed the majority of the time. 

Perhaps the bitterness of dying had changed that a little bit, or perhaps I was reading into his expressions a bit too much.

I stepped past him as I made my way into the lounge to sit down for a bit before starting to fix supper. I glanced over my shoulder curiously, only to find Silver following me. Our eyes met, and he looked at me expectantly, but I only shook my head in response.

In truth, I'd only looked back to make sure he really was there. It was almost impossible to tell with ghosts since they made no sound. 

I always trusted Amos, Billy, and Carlyle to be somewhere around the house. But Silver was new and evidently enough not something I’d dreamed up all on my own, despite what a good job I’d done convincing myself that was the case.

“You know,” I started as I sat down on the loveseat, “I hadn’t been entirely sure I’d really seen you last night.”

Silver blinked at me in slight surprise before sitting down next to me. And it was odd. Because Amos, Billy, and Carlyle usually glided around in the air, but here was Silver just sitting next to me like he was alive and well. 

Save for the fact that the cushions didn’t dip with his weight and there was no sound of his breathing.

But he wasn’t even really see-through. Instead, he looked like he was just right here next to me, alive and well.

He watched me expectantly, and I shrugged. Feeling myself relax just like I always had around him, “I kind of thought that both you and our conversation from last night had been a dream… It just seemed so odd for you to be here instead of being with Lilia, Malleus, or Sebek.”

I looked his way in time to see him nod in an understanding manner, “I did follow them around for a while, and they all seemed to be doing well. I figured it was time for me to move on, but I didn’t know where to go, so I came here.”

He looked my way once more, tilting his head slightly, “It feels right here, and the other ghosts welcomed me. I hadn’t actually expected you to notice my presence since no one else had, but you did. In fact, sometimes it felt like you were looking right at me. Waiting for me to say something to you and make myself known. So I decided to reveal myself to you last night since the others had already told you there was another ghost here anyway.”

I felt myself frown at his explanation, pondering his words until I remembered little things that had been happening around the house.

 Like how I would hear something in the hallway ever so often only to turn and not see anything. Or how one of the rocking chairs would be moving on the porch without a breeze and with no one else near it. And even how whenever I had felt lonely, I would suddenly feel as if there was someone with me even though I’d never seen anyone.

I had just passed it off as nothing of great importance; weird things had always happened at Ramshackle dorm. That was why so many students behaved like it was a scary place, even though I was living in it with very few problems now that I’d finally gotten it fully repaired from the state it had been in when I first came to Twisted Wonderland.

“So how long have you been here exactly?” I watched him closely, and he did something I wasn’t sure I’d ever see him do in life. He shrugged.

“Hard to say. Time isn’t really important after you die, so you don’t pay much mind to it,” He tilted his head once more, almost like he was thinking before he looked my way again. “I was here last time Kalim came and visited, though.”

That had been several months ago… He’d certainly been here longer than I would’ve guessed, but I wasn’t actually concerned about that. I trusted Silver to respect my privacy, even in death.

“Why didn’t you go with him when he suggested you go live with him?” Silver’s question startled me, causing me to turn in slight surprise. He looked honestly curious, though, and I supposed that was fair.

I lifted one shoulder in a half-hearted shrug before I began ticking off my reasons on my fingers, “Several reasons. Jamil doesn’t need someone else to take care of, it wouldn’t feel right to just live off of Kalim’s generosity, and I have everything I need here.”

I looked out one of the large windows as I continued, still feeling Silver’s gaze on me, “Despite what everyone thinks, I’m happy here. Ramshackle dorm has become home to me, and I’m not lonely. I’ve got Grim, the rest of the staff, the ghosts…” I trailed off briefly before looking towards Silver once more and smiling, “And I guess I’ve got you now too.”

He blinked at my words before he nodded, almost as if he liked the sounds of that, “Yes, I suppose you do.”

I continued to smile at him, relieved that he hadn’t been a dream at all, even as I felt myself slipping back into the same situation I’d been in all those years ago. Slowly liking Silver a little bit too much, even though so much had changed.

And in some ways, it freaked me out. That all it took was him appearing once more, even as a ghost, for me to fall back in love with him.

Back in the past, I’d fallen for him even before the overblot, but I’d passed it off as a crush. Of course I’d liked Silver. We hadn’t gotten to interact much before everything went down with Malleus, but Silver was always nice and had looked out for me like it was the most natural thing to do.

 When the overblot occurred, I’d actually gotten to truly know him, and it hadn’t solved the matter at all. In fact, it had made it worse. But again, I’d told myself  that it was just a crush and was because of the situation we were in. It was so stressful and dangerous; the fact he’d gone to such pains to protect me and make sure I was alright had just made my crush worse. That was all.

But now I didn’t have any such explanations to hide behind. And he wasn’t alive anymore, which made this even more distressing. I was in love with a ghost, and, despite what I’d told myself, I’d never gotten over Silver.

I let my hands twist together in my lap as I looked over at the young man, who was no doubt oblivious to the feelings zipping through me just as fast as the thoughts in my mind were swirling. “Yep, so I’m fine. Not lonely at all.” 

He tilted his head as he gazed at me, “So I can stay here?”

I blinked at him, flabbergasted by his words, before leaning forward, my hands pressing down onto the edge of my cushion, “Of course you can! I would never kick you out!”

I didn’t bother mentioning that I hadn’t even realized that had been an option. I didn’t want to give him the wrong impression, even if that were the case.

But as I looked at him, his gaze softened ever so slightly, and that fleeting but condemningly sweet smile of his appeared on his face, “Then I will stay here, with you, until you leave Y/n.”

His voice was soft and gentle as always, and in that moment I realized that while ghostly happenings were always occurring in and around Ramshackle dorm, I may never recover from this one.

@vera-deville

#Twisted Wonderland imagines #Silver x reader #Silver twst #briarvalleyarchives #Twisted wonderland x reader #Silver #gender neutral reader #Ghost AU #Ghost!Silver #fluff #pining #angst with comfort #fic series #post diasomnia overblot #non canon compliant #Silver x you #Silver x y/n #twst #Disney TW #twst x reader #twst x y/n #twst x you #Twisted wonderland x you #Twisted wonderland x y/n #Halloween #October #fanfiction #mywritings #it-happened-one-fic #the ghost and mrs. muir

[thebroccolination]

Listen, Between Us is my child. My joy. My raison d’être.

But I do kind of have separate ratings for the series as a whole vs. WinTeam’s part in it. WinTeam Rating: 12/10, perfect my babies miraculous string music. The series…has a different rating. Undisclosed. Unimportant. New and Sheep did their best under extraordinary circumstances and I will defend their series to my last breath.

That said, I want to make a WinTeam supercut for myself.

‘Cos as far as I know, New didn’t just direct the series—he edited it as well, and I understand that he had a lot on his plate. But I do…kind of wish he’d delegated the editing to someone else. The mic noises, the music crowding some scenes, the flashbacks that go on for a really long time—much longer than they had to—presumably to pad out an episode, etc. Plus, well. BeePrince should have had their own series. Bee is already a side character, and Prince only has Bee and his manager to flesh him out. I think Tae did a fantastic job as Bee, but Benz as Prince never really grabbed me emotionally. Their plot felt sort of sped-run to me, and I started fast-forwarding past them in later episodes. I don’t dislike them, to be clear, I just didn’t feel much of anything in any direction. Love Bee, neutral on BeePrince.

I wish I could fix all the muffled noises from the actors squishing their body mics during hugs and oh my god New kept playing the instrumental version of Prem’s song in a painfully sharp/high-pitched key that felt more like a horror soundtrack than the uplifting/happy instrumental they played in the locker room scene of episode two. But I can’t fix those issues because I’d probably need the original high quality dialogue tracks in order to isolate and remove parts of them. And aaahh, more than anything I wish I could remove the music from some scenes—the late-night “if I asked you, would you have an answer for me” conversation has, like, four or five music cues in it and it’s ONE SCENE, NEW. I’m a huge champion of sound engineering as an art form that should be respected, and so a lot of scenes genuinely felt to me like wasted opportunities. Sound and music aren’t supposed to hammer viewers in the face with the mood of a scene. And BounPrem were at top form in this series, so I wish they had had more scenes where they aren’t interrupted by a song in the middle. Where they just got to have quiet and New let their acting carry the scene.

(This is something New also did in UWMA. Like, as much as I enjoy the cabin scene and the dorm room scene, neither of them needed that song blasted over them. Let the actors carry the scene!!!)

Basically, my only major issues with Between Us were editing-based. Hence why I wish New had let someone else do it. Maybe he didn’t have the money to spare. Maybe he just didn’t want to. No idea.

But that’s why I want to make my own WinTeam cut so I can binge their storyline when I’m having a rough day and I don’t want to fast-forward to get to them. (That’s not to say I didn’t like everyone else! I did! But y’know. WinTeam. My babies.) I’ll include some of the other pairings when their scenes are relevant to WinTeam’s story, but mostly I just want to zero in on WinTeam. (I’ll keep all of WanTul since they’re the pairing with the closest storyline to WinTeam, and the two pairs converge later in the series, but I’m tempted to play with the timeline and see if I can’t blend them in elsewhere.)

I know why BeePrince didn’t have their own series. Side pairings are a profitable and inevitable marketing element of the BL industry, and I don’t begrudge New for trying to advertise some of his actor stable in a highly anticipated series that was guaranteed to have thousands of potential fans watching it. It’s tough out there, and New’s got a purebred cat family to feed and Boun’s salary to provide. Sell what you gotta sell, babe.

(I’m actually a little tempted to do this same thing for SOTUS S because HOO boy do I not care about the side couples in Arthit’s office. KongArt + TewDae + seven seconds of sapphics is all I want.)

Anyway! I’m gonna make this my li’l project. I’m not sure I’ll post it publicly because I don’t want to step on the official versions, but I’ll probably post some isolated scenes while I experiment with editing. For my first step I’ll try to cut down some of those flashback scenes. Like Win in the shower remembering his entire conversation with Dean and Pruk? For multiple minutes? Win might have relived the entire thing, but we shouldn’t. The series is only twelve episodes, New, and that conversation wasn’t that long ago even for those of us who watched it live. We remember. We got it.

If New needed more footage to pad out the episode, just have Boun do his hair and skin care routines. Literally who would complain? “Look, a beautiful human being. Stare.” WITH PLEASURE.

“Oh no the episode is short. Prem, pout for thirty seconds.” I WILL TAKE A THOUSAND SCREENSHOTS.

“Ohm, do some push-ups.” I’m sure he does those!

“Prem, Sammy, ad-lib an argument.” More Team and Manaow bickering! Grand!

“Fluke, be perfect.” PHARM’S APPEARANCES IN THIS SERIES WERE FLAWLESS I HOPE HE GETS THE RESPECT HE DESERVED THE FIRST TIME AROUND.

So you see, there are workarounds when you need to pad out time. No need to show us the same scenes again.

Anyway, in addition to writing fic, this is how I’m coping with our collective loss.

#between us the series #between us #winteam #teamwin