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endlessthxxghts · 7 months

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You Better Jump... (1 of 2)

neighbor!joel miller x afab!reader || W/C: ≈2.5k

Summary: You wake up after a drunk night out to the lock on your door broken. The neighbor who lives in the same apartment complex as you offers to fix it for you.

Warnings: canon divergent (no outbreak) & mentions of Sarah but we don't see or interact with her (AU - she moved out, lives on her own). allusions to further sexual activity between reader and Joel, mainly fluff and flirting and embarrassing interactions that'll give you butterflies, an unhinged best friend (vulgar dialogue from said best friend), cellphone audio connecting elsewhere where other people can hear..., 18+ MDNI. F masturbation in a bathtub, Joel having incredible self control until he doesn't, making out... (I think that's it! As always, let me know if there's anything I missed that should be in here!)

Author's note: I intended for this to be a one shot, but I just know the next part will be pretty long. I still need to write up a few more details for part 2, but it will be posted VERY SOON! For now, please enjoy this. :)

PART 2 HERE (VERY NSFW, 18+ MDNI)!! || MASTERLIST

“Shit, I don’t even know which lock to get,” you mutter to yourself as you stand helplessly in the middle of the aisle.

You went to the bar last night, got a little too drunk for your own good, and when you woke up in the morning, your front door’s lock was broken. You genuinely don’t know how that happened, but you do know that you need to fix it as soon as possible, especially with the fact that you just moved in not too long ago and you live alone.

“Hey there,” a rough Texan drawl says, pulling you out of your thoughts. You look up to see a tall, broad man. Soft, brown eyes, a mustache and some scruff along his jawline. He’s clad in a dark blue t-shirt and some jeans. He’s handsome, and oh god, you’ve been completely gawking at him instead of responding. You finally meet his stare, and his eyes twinkle in delight, like he’s enjoying the attention you’re giving him. “Oh, hi, uh- I’m sorry, just kinda zoned out there for a sec,” you ramble on, trying to save yourself from the embarrassment.

“Oh,” he chuckles, “don’t worry about that.” He smiles, and you’ve never experienced anything more beautiful. “I, uh, couldn’t help but recognize ya, and overhear ya about the locks?” You give a confused look, and he continues, “I think we live in the same apartment complex. You just moved in a few weeks ago, right? I’m Joel.”

You are seriously so confused right now because you are so sure you would never forget if you had a neighbor that looks this handsome. And apparently all your defenses are down right now because you just fucking said that out loud.

You can see Joel’s cheeks and neck flush into a bright red, his hand shooting up to rub the back of his neck and the blush in your face follows. “Holy shit, I did not just fucking say that out loud,” you groan as you bury your hands into your face. You realize you still haven’t introduced your name, so you quickly squeak it out. He tells you it’s nice to meet you followed by your name, and he rambles on, “And I, uh, I’m flattered...you’re, uh, not too bad yourself.” Your head shoots up, and you swear your face cannot get even redder, but somehow it does.

He senses that you can’t handle anymore of this god awful attempt at flirting, so he saves you by continuing his original thought. “Well, what I was tryna say was- I overheard you sayin’ ya didn’t know which lock to choose? I’m pretty handy in the maintenance department, and I’ve helped a few neighbors in our complex with much more complicated than door locks. Maybe I can help ya?” You feel all the stress from your body completely fade away, and you absolutely take advantage of this beautiful man offering to help with your locks.

“Oh my god, really? I owe you one, thank you so so much,” you tell him. He smiles. “It’s no trouble at all, darlin,’” he says as he grabs the correct lock for the apartment complex, “this is the one we’d need.”

All you came here for was for the lock, but you ended up staying with him and having conversation throughout his entire Home Depot run. Turns out he’s a contractor, used to live in a home but since his daughter moved out he doesn’t find the necessity of having a big home for himself. He didn’t sell it though, he let his brother and his wife take it over. Very minimalist kind of guy.

You forget you two didn’t drive to the store together, so you’re almost kind of bummed at the fact that you have to separate from him. He bids you goodbye and says he has to run a few more errands. “Shouldn’t be more than an hour or two. Is it okay if I swing by your place then?”

You’ve been so entranced by his presence and your guys’ conversation that you forgot the entire reasoning behind why you began talking in the first place, and it’s heavily evident in your confused look. His lip quirks up again, “…to fix your door lock,” he adds, amused.

You mentally slap your forehead. Fucking get it together, you think to yourself. “Yes,” you immediately blabber out as soon as you realize you’ve gone quiet again. “Yes, that’s perfect.”

“Alright, darlin’, I’ll see you in a few,” he says as he shoots you a wink and begins walking in the direction of his truck, and there goes that nickname again.

Oh, you are absolutely fucked.

✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

It’s a ten minute drive back home, and as soon as you get back in the car, you call your best friend and tell her what an absolute fool you made out of yourself.

“BITCH,” she screams, gasping for air at how hard she’s laughing, “I can’t fucking stand you, oh my god, I’m crying.”

“You’re such a bitch,” you tell her, while tears are also streaming down your face, attempting to catch your breath. “Dude, I swear, once you get a good look at him, you’ll see what the fuck I’m talking about, and you’ll see my reaction was VALID to such a beautiful looking man.”

She stays on the phone with you for the rest of your little drive, and ends your guys’ conversation with, “In all seriousness, though, you better jump on that di-”

You gasp out and yell her name, “OH MY GOD, you’re done. Goodbye.”

She cackles, “Update me later, babe. I love you.”

“I love you more, you fuckin’ menace,” you say as you park.

✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

Your next few hours are filled with you absolutely stressing. You know Joel is just coming to fix the door, but you can’t shake away the nerves. So you spend the first hour absolutely deep cleaning your apartment.

You still have about maybe an hour left, so you decide to try and calm your nerves some more with a quick bath. You quickly undress and give yourself a quick wash in the shower to wash all of today’s dirt before you set up your bath.

Filling up the tub, you throw in some lavender scented bubbles and light your favorite cashmere vanilla candle, the combination of the scents immediately relaxing you. Maybe a little too relaxed, though, because as you sink deeper into the tub, your body can’t help but continue to rise in heat at the thought of Joel. Without thinking, your eyes slowly close and your hand drifts closer to where you’re aching the most.

You start by drawing soft circles on your clit, pulling soft little mewls from your throat. The thought of those big rough hands pushes you to move a little faster, and the thought of that scruff rubbing against your inner thigh pushes you to dip your middle and ring finger into your entrance, pumping in and out with such a need you haven’t experienced in a while. The sounds coming out of you now are high pitched and whiny, and you can’t help the way your body writhes against the bathtub, sloshing water out the sides.

Your hips are grinding up against your palm, stimulating your clit while your fingers hit that velvety spot that drives you absolutely mad. You bring your other hand up to your mouth as a reflex to silence your sounds, but an image flashes in your mind that it was Joel’s hand over your mouth instead, and that’s what ends you.

Your eyes clamp shut, head thrown back, spine completely arched, and all you can see are little white fireworks behind your eyelids as your orgasm breaks you, the lukewarm water feeling hotter than when you first drew the bath.

You sit there for a moment to catch your breath, willing your body to work since the man you just touched yourself to should be here in any minute.

You dry yourself off, putting your hair up in a towel and dressing in some gray sweat-shorts and a tank top, not caring to completely doll your figure since he’s in your home after all. Right as you finish up your skincare, you hear a knock at your door. You take one more look at yourself, and you’re still absolutely flushed with a hint of that orgasmic glow, but you can’t bring yourself to care. If he can make you cum like that with just the thought of him, you’re absolutely gonna take your best friend’s advice from earlier.

✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧

You open the door for him and immediately the heat you tried to save yourself from is back, tenfold. “Hey, darlin’,” he says with a smile. The nickname makes the butterflies in your tummy flutter harder than before. You give a sweet smile back. It’s his turn to melt, but you don’t clock it as easily as he can with you.

He steps inside, a little closer to you, and immediately he falls to his knees. You watch him, wide-eyed, as he pulls out a few little tools from his back pocket, and suddenly you realize you were holding your breath. Here he is, wasting no time getting started on fixing your door for you while you stare at him like he’s giving you a strip tease, all because he got down on his knees.

You clear your throat, trying to regain your composure, and you offer, “C-can I get you anything to drink? Water, coffee, tea?”

He looks up at you, and he cannot get enough. Your flushed cheeks, the way your body language shows your excitement and nerves all in one, your towel lopsided on your head. So goddamn beautiful, he thinks to himself. Again, it’s his turn as he zones out in his thoughts, but this time, you do notice, and you can’t help but feel a sense of confidence shoot down your spine at the fact that you’re affecting him just as much as he affects you.

Your smirk grows the longer he stares, and finally he realizes what’s happening, and his face goes tomato red. He’s pretty sure no one has ever seen him blush this much since he was a teenager. “Some water would be wonderful, sweetheart, thank you,” he says, thanking whatever God in existence that his words were coherent and not a blubbering mess like his brain.

“Coming right up,” you say, and make your way into your kitchen, thankful for the little private moment to yourself. As you grab Joel a cup and fill it with ice and water, you feel your phone ring in your pocket. It’s your best friend. You bring your phone to your ear, hitting the answer button on the way up.

“Hello?” you repeat several times before you hear your best friend, but not through your phone. Forgetting the water for a minute, you scramble to the living room, where Joel is right next to, to hear your best friend coming from your living room speaker: Hello? Can you hear me?? I said did you jump on sexy neighbor’s dick ye-

You hurriedly end the call and throw your phone across the room. Your heart starts to pound even harder when you see Joel in your peripheral view, still working hard on the lock, but he is definitely in the proximity to have seen and heard everything. You quickly turn back to the kitchen to grab the glass, purposely avoiding Joel’s eye.

Quickly you grab the glass and place it on the little table near the front door. Joel sits back on his haunches for a moment and takes a long gulp of the ice cold water. Too amused at the display that happened moments ago, he can’t help himself when he says, “So… sounds like ya got your hands full with that friend of yours, hm?” He looks up at you with mischief in his eye.

And just like that, any sense of confidence you had at having the upper hand over this Texan man went down the drain. You completely fumble. “Oh- I- yeah, my best friend… Did you hear- Fuck, no, of course you heard, I-”

Joel pulls himself up to stand at full height, now towering over you. He brings his pointer finger and thumb to your chin, pulling you to meet his eyes while also pulling you from the hole you keep digging deeper. You immediately shut up. He has a crooked grin plastered on his face when he says, “I didn’t hear a thing,” followed by a wink. You can feel your knees wanting to buckle. You breathily squeak out an okay and he assures you with another okay in response. You two stare into each other’s eyes for a moment before Joel, without thinking, says, “Let me take ya out to dinner.”

You slowly pull away from his grasp, afraid you’re invading his space even though he just asked you out on a date. He takes it as a sign of discomfort and immediately creates an arm’s length of space between you. “I-I’m sorry if I overstepped or made you uncomfor-”

“No, Joel, hey,” you cut him off quickly, stepping slightly closer. “You just surprised me, that’s all. I’d love to go to dinner with you,” you beam up at him, your bottom lip wedged in your mouth to ease your nervousness. “I just pulled away because I didn’t wanna make you uncomfortable or anything,” you quickly add.

“That’ll never happen,” he softly says. He steps closer again. “I’m sorry, but I- Shit, okay, I’m a gentleman through and through, but I-” he pauses for a moment, “I just- I really need to kiss you-”

You don’t let him finish his thought as you grab onto his arms and pull him into you, guiding both his arms around your lower back and guiding your arms around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer. It’s a battle of teeth and tongue, and the way your noses bump each other ever so often is enough for you to completely buckle. His hold on you is tight enough to keep you standing, but you truly don’t know how much more of this you can take with a certain bulge pushing into your lower belly. His one hand falls lower and testing the waters, he lightly grasps onto your asscheek. You moan into his mouth at that, and he takes that as your signal for him to fully grab you, hiking you up onto your tippy toes in an attempt to consume more of you. He breaks the kiss a little to give you some airflow back, but he doesn’t pull away. Instead, he brings his kisses to the side of your mouth, to your cheek, gliding down your jaw and neck, licking and nipping anywhere you give him access to.

You were right. It’s not quite exactly your thighs like you were imagining earlier, but the way his plump lips, mustache, and scruff feel along your neck is absolutely sinful and addicting, and…

Oh, you are absolutely fucked.

Author's note - extended: I hope you guys enjoyed this enough to tune in to part 2! The 2nd part will be very SMUTTY, so... ;)

EDIT: As of the new year 2024, I no longer do taglists!! Follow @endlessthxxghtsnotifs and turn on the notifications to be updated when new stories come out!!

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gyunglitter · 5 months

Text

the links

- just you dicking around with txt college!au besties

warnings: not edited, kinda long, mentions of gym bros, bitchless behavior, drunk fighting, mentions of camp rock, cursing, prolly should’ve put that last before the other lmao, partying, suspicious tampering with drinks

tags: txtxreader (platonic), non-idol!au, college!au, txt, lag, tomorrowxtogether, lesserafim, hansohee, drabble fics!, bulletpoint fics!

notes: bro i’ve been sitting on this for a while, but since i got sick, i finally had the time to actually write this—not very drabble fic of me, but i hope yall enjoyed it :) feel free to send in asks/requests abt this au!!

⚤ masterlist

just how did this rag tag group get together?

tbh with yall

the losers club took a while to actually get established

we’re talkin the end of the winter semester babes

to be fair tho☝️🤓

each of you were either awkward, antisocial, or autistic

but you all came around eventually

through small and simple means, the hottest friend group came to be!!

yeonjun + taehyun:

met in calc 101 in the winter semester

taehyun needed the class for his major

but yeonjun accidentally stumbled in on the first day and felt too awkward to leave

he tried to play it cool like he totally belonged

but taehyun could tell right when he sat next to him and his gigantic water bottle and protein shake

it only sealed the deal when yeonjun asked to borrow a pencil

“thanks! oh wow…i don’t think i’ve seen a pencil like this”

“it’s a mechanical..?”

“aha, yeaaaaaah…”

they really looked like 🤨 and ✌🏽🤪✌🏽

the both of them simultaneously felt transported back to their high school days

with yeonjun’s jockiness and taehyun’s brutal deadpan

the two intimidated the HELL out of each other😭

they were extremely awkward despite trying to act like they weren’t they totally were

but that hour of calc was pure torture

yeonjun made sure to stay far away from the engineering building after that lmao

it was only when they accidentally ran into each other at the gym that they bonded

after yeonjun almost dropped the bar on himself and his initial spotter got distracted

he swore he was gonna quite literally off himself at that moment

yeonjun was surprised to see the small kid from calc save him from his death with only ONE arm

an arm that was as big as HIS HEAD?!?! :O

after that, the two saw each other very often and became the ultimate Gym Bros🔥💪🏽

which took a lot of emotional work on both ends after their traumatic high school days

but taehyun STANS yeonjun and his diligence to zumba!

while yeonjun admires taehyun’s pull game when they go to the club together!

they became an unlikely platonic match made in heaven :D

soobin + hueningkai:

this friendship was DESPERATE

to be fr

soobin was LONELY :(

he’d be starting his third year of college and had yet to find his forever-friends his therapist promised he’d make once he made it to college!!

it wasn’t until he met his double at the Video and Audio Enthusiasts club meeting

a club created solely to use the conputer and projector room from 5-6pm every thursday to watch jujutsu kaisen without the faculty knowing

soobin had been apart of the club since his sophomore year when it started, but there was only so much socializing he could do with the same three people who come

at least until a very green freshman!kai walked in!!

it was kai’s first semester and first week away from home

and boy was he nervous

his older sister who had just graduated from the same college forced him to sign up for clubs in order to make good friends

she held his precious molang plushie hostage until he came back with proof of signing up for at least one club :(

BUT HE WAS SO OVERWHELMED AT CLUB RUSH??

all these ppl pitching why their club was so great with their bright posters, over enthusiastic campaigners, and loud music blasting from portable speakers???

kai just wanted to go back to his room and down the tub of mint choco he left in his mini fridge

but alas

the things he does for molang !! >.<

he signed up for the audio and visual enthusiasts club solely bc there was only one person manning the table

and she was knocked out

so when he signed up, he skedaddled out of there with the intention of showing up to one meeting before staging a dramatic but undeniable leave of absence

for the rest of the year >:)

little did he know his first day would bring him an adorable, lanky man who would never leave him alone!!

fr tho

soobin saw this 6’0 child who gave off “i WILL bit you” vibes and said

“he’s mine”

and the rest was history tbh

you never really see one without the other with the way they leech on to each other

the two of them honestly are complete angels together

beomgyu + you:

now

YOU TWO

if soobin and kai are angels, yall are the goddamn devils💀

you guys actually met your freshman year

you shared a lot of the same generals, but didn’t interact that much

mainly bc beomgyu was typically either gaming or sleeping in

meanwhile you always showed up to class zooted

unlike your classes that focused on your major, your generals were classes you couldn’t care less about

and your grades sure did show for it😬

your parents and teachers were worried you were gonna flunk out after your first semester and lose your scholarship

it wasn’t until the two of you were thrown together for a group project that things changed

forced proximity trope🥵

but not for the reasons you’re thinking!!

instead of working together, pulling all nighters, and trauma bonding together

you guys were the only ones slacking during all of the group meetings

the both of you succeed in pissing the other members off as yall constantly showed up late, distracted each other with origami cranes/airplanes/SMASH, and once got the group kicked out of the library for trying to secretly smoke a bowl behind the stacks

but you blamed that on beomgyu and his weak lungs

safe to say, you and beomgyu did a great job of alienating yourselves from the other members in your group

(fun fact: soobin was one of them—he HATED yall)

but you two ultimately bonded after skipping one of the meetings when you bumped into each other on campus and decided to go to the arcade down the street instead LMAO

after successfully beating him at the racing games and letting him win the sharpshooter games, the two of you were inseparable!!

especially since yall flunked that class and had to take it again the next semester lmao

you almost lost your scholarship

but for the rest of your classes, beomgyu helped you cram for your exams!

turns out your stoner-gamer-boy-bestie used to be student body vice president in high school??

he helped you pass the rest of your classes your freshman and sophomore years, in exchange you let him collect all your scarabs😭

hueninkai + taehyun:

this friendship is so cute omg

this came during winter semester, after kai established a friendship with soobin and restored some of his self-confidence

and with all his new, interesting classes finally catering to his curious nature

kai had started to branch out of his shell and thrive in the college environment

he still didn’t have any friends besides soobin, but he faced everyday with a bright smile :)

and then there was taehyun

fall semester had not been kind to him, having no time for socializing quite yet :(

poor taehyun at the time was exhausted from his ridiculous workload and would show up to class half dead each morning

BUT IN COMES HYUKA THE ANGEL😭

the two shared a life skills class and were seat mates

kai noticed taehyun’s state each morning

which wasn’t too hard since taehyun was slumped over his desk every morning and only woke up when class started

and sometimes not even then

in response, kai had kindly made a habit of bringing taehyun a coffee each morning and leaving it on his desk :(

not only that, kai was always just a natural energizer!

with his positive attitude and earnest countenance, taehyun couldn’t help but feel ready to take on the day as well !

as thanks, there never failed to be a copy of the answer key to whatever test was coming up on hueningkai’s desk the next day

taehyun really is THAT man🥵

ngl hyuka felt like he had a sugar daddy of sorts at the beginning

but the two have the sweetest friendship after that!!

they’re genuinely so grateful for each other and balance out really well

yeonjun + you + beomgyu:

a friendship that started off contractually

it was the winter semester of your sophomore year and you were in a bit of an artistic drought

the last time your work had taken off was a complete accident

you’d been high off your ass and posted a hodgepodge of the last 10 screenshots in your camera roll, smartly titled “Hell is A Teenage Girl”

it gained so much attention for its authenticity and now you had no idea how to follow THAT up :(

your bestie beomgyu constantly offered to model for you

but you could never take him seriously after he showed up to your house in lingerie so you could “picture him like your french girls”

“that’s not even how it goes, headass”

“it’s called taking ‘creative liberties’, birdbrain—and you’re supposed to be the artist?”

“please…just put some clothes on. i can’t take you seriously when your balls are in my face”

anyways

you were struggling to come up with anything after that stunt

until you saw your muse in him

the him being yeonjun, who came straight from zumba and was currently downing a bowl of ramyeon from the caf

you shared no classes, interests, or mutuals

but one thing you had in common?

you both thought he was hot!!

you had cornered him with the abrupt confession that he had the most "photograph-able" face and you needed to shoot him for a new project of yours

(with compensation, of course)

yall looked like 🫵🙂📷 and ⁉️😗🍜

yeonjun reluctantly agreed since he was broke and needed more ramyeon money

the shoot started off kind of uncomfortable since you two were incredibly awkward

but you eventually warmed up to each other with your terrible jokes that made him die laughing!

you never would've pegged him as a pun-lover, but you were certainly not disappointed :)

as the shoot finished up, you ended up going out for ice cream together

to which beomgyu crashed and ended up fighting with yeonjun about everything under the sun

it all started with yeonjun’s preference for mint choco, that everything started to go up in flames lmao

you were sure yeonjun would want nothing to do with the pair of you after that night

BUT THEN THE PICTURES WENT VIRAL

your work blew up once again and yeonjun got many modelling offers!!

with the newfound clout given to yeonjun, came an unlikely partnership between you two as you brought out the best in each other’s works

and with you, came beomgyu as a package deal

the two eventually ended up bonding as time went on and they discovered they shared many interests

but you were the glue to hold them together for a while since they never failed to get on each other’s nerves

tom and jerry fr🙄

everyone:

after a draining week of school and his zumba class getting cancelled, yeonjun decided he wanted to go to a party

he needed a drink and a good excuse to dance since his feet were happy and his hips were in need of speaking their truth

lucky for him, there was supposed to be a CRAZY RAGER this weekend

yeonjun was told it was thrown by some uppclassmen named jackson wang or something?

🤷‍♀️

BUT IT WAS PERFECT!!

but he couldn't go alone--he'd look like a loser

which he's NOT >:(

so he brought his gym bro, taehyun!

but then the two were faced with the predicament of looking like much worse

homosexuals!! :0

god forbid two men hang out in public

so taehyun brought his other bestie, kai!!

but mans hates large social gatherings and would rather drown in his toilet than watch the musclemen pull the pretty girls he was afraid of

so he brought the also bitchless soobin along to keep himself entertained :D

meanwhile you were also getting dragged to the party by beomgyu, whose band had gigged it, since he needed emotional support!

the event had started off fine!

beomgyu was killing it with his band

soobin and kai were awkwardly curbing girls' stares and suspicious drinks sent their way with queries as to a foursome

yeonjun was in the middle of a mosh pit, getting absolutely wrecked

taehyun was getting danced on by not one, but TWO girls

AT THE SAME TIME

and you were currently crowd surfing despite having no recollection as to how you got there

you were honestly not vibing since you had a slight fear of heights

and an aversion to sweaty men in closed spaces

so when you were eventually put down, you stumbled your way back to the kitchen to get a breather

and maybe a shot while you were at it—god knows you need one to get through the rest of the night

however, your plans halted once you caught sight of your beloved ex-group partner from biochem!!

“woah hey, soobie-boobie?!” you hollered

cue soobin, who was in the middle of a heated rant about the band refusing his request of playing “meant to be” by bebe rexha, freezing with a soulless look in his eyes

it was you

you (+beomgyu, btw) were the reason he had to pull multiple all nighters to complete your part of the project you failed to do the previous year

mans nearly lost the will to live during that project

he’d hated yall with a passion and did NOT fail to snitch after the project was submitted

it was bc of him that you had to retake that class and almost get your scholarship revoked

of course, nobody knew it was him, since he was a sly motherfucker and blamed it on kim chaewon instead

but he planned on taking that secret with him to the grave, since he would rather take a nap on the freeway than deal with confrontation

but he had no reason to, by the way you were calling for him with the dopiest smile on your face

he hoped he could get away with ignoring you since it was so loud

but then you let out a screech that pierced the heavens

“SOOBIE BOOBIE TOOBIE WOOBIE FOOBIEEEEE!!”

hhnggg

he closed his eyes to block out the sight of you now standing on the counter and waving your arms like crazy

if he couldn’t see you, then you didn’t exist

but, unfortunately, soobin wasn’t the only person with eyes and ears

“hey, hyung, i dunno if it’s just me, but i think that girl might know you!”

soobin opened his eyes to see kai waving back at the girl for him

soobin wanted to die when he saw you take that as confirmation to join them

“hey! long time no see!!” you greeted as you took a seat with the pair of them

hyuka easily took to you while soobin tried his best not to look utterly disgusted

“so how do you two know each other?” kai asked

“soobin and i were paired for a group project last year!”

soobin frowned at you, but you were none the wiser as you entertained the curious kai

“oh cool!! what class was that?”

“honestly, i have no clue! i was high half the school year, thank god soobin was there to help me and my other friend for that project!”

soobin scoffed at that, causing both you and kai to look at him questioningly

“was that a cough?”

“did you need a drink?” you innocently offered one of the many drinks the boys had discarded

soobin shook his head vigorously at that, making you shrug

“welp, more for me then!”

AND DOWNED IT

kai and soobin were too slow to stop you, and watched in horror as you finished the drink with a pinched expression

“holy shit, are you okay?!” soobin asked

but you were preoccupied with the upset feeling in your stomach

“ugh, what the hell was that?” you tried to stop yourself from burping, but you could feel yourself getting lightheaded

“ah man, i knew those drinks weren’t safe” kai winced, watching as you nearly fell out of your seat before soobin caught you

soobin groaned at the prospect of having to take care of you, but lifted you up a bit while you babbled and whisked yourself out of his hold

“hey, im fine—i actually feel great! we should go dance!”

and you were off, dragging an innocent kai with you to where the rest of the party was dancing to the band

not wanting to be left alone after you so rudely took his only friend, soobin ran after the pair of you

meanwhile kai, who had been dragged with you, felt like he was gonna have a panic attack in the face of all these people you dragged him toward

he felt like he was getting swallowed up in a sea of drunk, horny young adults

which, technically, he was

you were none the wiser to the boy’s fears as you started dancing

to hueningkai’s absolute horror, you were actually doing the camp rock stomp dance from the second movie

part of him wanted to ask you to drop a tutorial

the better part of him made him want to crawl in a hole and die

for the both of your sakes’, he blamed your behavior on the alcohol and spared you more embarrassment by turning away from you and looking for help

and his saving grace came in the form of his lord and savior, kang taehyun

mans was a lil busy with a few of the drunk and horny young adults himself

but what kai wants, kai gets!!

so when he called for his friend, taehyun came without a complaint

he also miraculously had a glass of water in hand, just in case kai got thirsty

“what’s wrong? do you need to go home?” taehyun worried, shoving the glass into his friend’s hand

kai was grateful for his friend

thank god he wasn’t too drunk to be helpful!!

kai merely shook his head at his friend’s questions, and started to drag him back to you

“there’s a girl who got roofied, and she’s doing the camp rock stomp dance—we have to help her!”

but when kai got to you, he found a mess

that mess being you and soobin squealing around while yeonjun was running away from another guy who looked drunk out of his mind and pissed as hell

how yeonjun and soobin got there? and who this other guy was?? and HOW the three of you managed to piss him off???

kai and taehyun had no clue

but they could tell things did not look good for yall

soobin was currently hiding behind a disoriented you, using your inebriated self as a shield

meanwhile yeonjun was narrowly avoiding haphazard punches thrown at him, practically dancing away from them

“what do i do?! what do i do?!?!” yeonjun screamed

“DRAG HIS ASS!” taehyun yelled, right before socking a random guy in front of him

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!” kai screamed, leaping away from the new, unprovoked beatdowns taehyun was causing

“fighting my demons!”

maybe taehyun was a little too drunk to be helpful :/

kai scrambled towards you and soobin, who had backed away from the initial fighting pair

“what the hell happened? i wasn’t even gone for two minutes!!”

“i found y/n right after you left, who had saved yeonjun from the mosh pit—”

“—mans was getting his shit blended in there—”

“we were about to come find you, when y/n grabbed some random guy’s ass—”

“—to be fair, i thought he was kai—”

“and when the guy turned around to fight her, she blamed it on yeonjun!!”

“well, duh! i’m just a lil girl!!”

kai blanched at you, while you pouted up at him

you were all like 🥺 👉🏽👈🏽

you had such a sweet look on your face tbh, that kai and soobin almost cracked

before you turned around barfed into a potted plant

things literally could not get worse

“WORLDSTAR! WORLDSTAAAR!!”

it took the three of you a second to realize where that yelling had been coming from

but you finally found the source when you looked on stage and found beomgyu filming the fights going on

“fuck me, he’s here too?!” soobin whined

and while beomgyu had gotten your guys’ attention, he had also gotten a few others’ as well

“hey, you got your friend filming me? i’m here on scholarship!”

the big guy yelled, grabbing yeonjun to hold him still as he went to punch him again

“oh fuck,” yeonjun muttered

beomgyu fumbled around with his phone and guitar, going to brandish the instrument in one hand like a weapon to help out his friend

but luckily didn’t have to when a pot smashed against the attacker’s head, knocking him out cold

the partygoers watched as the big guy dropped to the floor, right in front of yeonjun

yeonjun looked in disbelief from his side of the fallen body

over to you on the other side, your hand still raised in the air from its defensive attack

“holy shit!” beomgyu gasped

“holy shit!” you gasped back

the party was silent for a second

before everyone erupted in cheers!! :D

and everyone stood up and clapped

“THAT WAS AWESOME!”

people around you were jumping around and back to partying again

meanwhile the rest of the group came back to you

“are you guys okay??” kai asked

“i think i just shit my pants,” yeonjun breathed, clutching onto his chest

he looked as white as a ghost, but he didn’t get any injuries

luckily, the guy was too drunk to properly do any damage to yeonjun

but he was still afraid at the possibility!!

you merely nodded at kai in acknowledgment, before leaning tiredly on the person nearest to you

which happened to be taehyun, as he kept you upright with his non-bloodied hand

and then there was beomgyu, who ran over to yall with his phone in the air

“oh my god, i got the whole thing on video!!”

“did i look cool?”

you asked him tiredly from your position

“kind of, you’ve got a bit of barf on your chin, but i could probably photoshop it out later!”

“let’s gooo!! :D”

the two of you fist bumped, before yeonjun turned to you

“thanks for knocking that guy out, y/n, you saved me”

“but she was the one who got you in that mess—”

“of course, yeonjun! what are friends for?!”

you unknowingly interrupted soobin, causing everyone in the group to clap at your selfless words

"come on, let's all get out of here and get some ramyeon--on me!" yeonjun pulled out his daddy's credit card

causing the rest of the group to cheer

soobin’s eye twitched at yall SO HARD

“are you fucking with me rn?? SHE’S the reason this all happened—?!”

but soobin was drowned out by your guys' cheers as you all headed for the door

"come on soobin, before that guy wakes up and tries to go for round two!"

kai shouted, dragging soobin along and stepping over the guy that was still passed out

"oh, what the hell," soobin gave in, internally praying for the strength to tolerate you and beomgyu for the rest of the night

"woah wait a sec," beomgyu said deliriously, looking at soobin like he just realized he was there

"soobie boobie? when the fuck did you get here?"

soobin, on cue, gave the heaviest eye roll known to man

"i've BEEN here, motherfucker!"

…..

…and the rest was history!!😅

after that, yall just kind of gravitated to each other until suddenly

your snapchat streaks were too high

you’d gone grocery shopping for each other’s favorite snacks

and your moms all knew abt each other and would constantly ask abt you

yall were in too deep and decided to just kind of stick together after that :)

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vestaclinicpod · 2 months

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Audio Drama Sunday - 18th February ✨

Happy Audio Drama Sunday!! I feel as though I barely listened to any audio drama this week then made up for it by listening for hours today. What else are Sundays for?

👻 @tellnotalespod (S2E3.5) I LOVE this. This is what Leo could be doing with their recorder if they weren’t so bloody traumatised. Hoping for the resolution where they save queer community spaces as a trio 🫶

🧳 Travelling Light @monstrousproductions (12) There’s nothing better than hopping on my bike home from work on a Friday evening and having a new TL episode waiting for me! This week’s made me feel a little sad but I was immediately drawn in by the new threads of drama aboard the Tola. It’s Dr Duytren that Óli has been avoiding! But why?! I can’t wait to find out.

Also, I just want to talk about how much I love the way that the Traveller describes Óli compared to the others. I can’t yet tell how strictly platonic their relationship is - and I suspect the Traveller doesn’t know either - but I can’t help but notice how much more aware of Óli’s physicality they are and how they notice so many sweet little things about them. It’s lovely to see the bond growing between them 🥺

❤️‍🔥 (9) A long episode from The Love Talker, but one that provided a horrifying insight into the titular menace and Ren’s backstory. I feel like I can tell how this is going to end and it’s not well for Mister Cicada.

🍾 I’ve had a lovely time continuing @ameliapodcast this week - I particularly enjoyed Mai-Linh’s predicament and it didn’t end the way I thought it would!

⚔️ @camlannpod (4) I HIGHLY recommend taking your lunch break alone with Camlann in your ears. I did this on Monday and it was so restorative. I loved this episode and the balance of action, love and a genuinely unsettling jump scare from Felix Trench. I’ve been thinking about that Wooden Overcoats quote all week 🥹

🖥️ The Magnus Protocol (6) This episode really had me feeling like I was listening to something that I *really* shouldn’t be listening to. Hated it (in a good way). Also, who is the new girl!! And why is she so . . . chill?

🍎 There I was, thinking I wouldn’t listen to any @notquitedeadpod this week and then I listened to 5 episodes today … oops. Alfie has just made a deadly blunder and it’s like watching a car crash at this point - I’m wincing but I’m definitely not looking away. I still don’t trust Neige. . .

Have a lovely week, everyone!! 🥰

#audio drama sunday #travelling light #not quite dead #camlann #tell no tales #the love talker #tmagp #the amelia project

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starlitangels · 1 year

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Sorry (Isn’t Enough)

When James said “I’ve missed things I can never get back” in his little flashback audio, my genuine first thought was, “Oh. Oh homeboy has missed at least one anniversary. Hasn’t he?” and I wrote this from that. 2.5k words (almost exactly)

—

I stood in front of the mirror, biting my lip. “Too much?” I asked no one. The apartment was empty apart from me. It often was, and I’d taken up talking to myself, apparently.

I took in my outfit. The restaurant wasn’t overly formal. “It’s the shoes,” I decided. “Need more casual shoes.” I pushed my clothes closer to James’ mostly-empty half of the closet to free up where my shoe hanger was crammed in the back next to the wall. “Converse are too casual but I don’t need dress shoes… where are those damn boat shoes—they’re like right in the middle, right?” I kept muttering as I looked down each hanging square of shoe storage.

I hope he’s at least somewhat on time… what if traffic is bad? I thought. James’ job, contracting with the Department, paid very well, but it made his schedule unpredictable. His flight was supposed to land at 4:47, and our dinner reservation was at 5:30. He was fairly certain the Uber would get to the restaurant just in time to meet me there, but things happened at airports. Weather delays, traffic, random people causing a ruckus on a plane.

Stop it. He’ll be there. He promised not to miss our anniversary, I reassured myself, snatching my shoes out of the hanging storage when I finally found the right ones. The blue boat shoes, not the black. He made the Department promise.

I sat on the bed and took off the shoes I’d been wearing before. The nice thing about boat shoes was the lack of laces and buckles. I could just slide right into them.

As I was pulling my fingers out of the back of the first shoe I’d shoved my foot into, my phone starting ringing. I recognized the number—that I wasn’t allowed to save to my phone—of where James had been staying. I snatched my phone off the bed.

“Hey baby!” I greeted.

“Hi love,” James replied.

“Uh-oh. I know that tone. What’s wrong?”

He sighed. “The Department called me yesterday. The job hit a snag. It’s being delayed two more weeks. I won’t be home tonight.”

“But…” I swallowed the tears caught in my throat. “But it’s our anniversary. You—you’ve never missed an anniversary.”

“I know. I tried to tell the Department—but they didn��t listen. And it took them a whole day to give me clearance to even call you about it. I am so, so sorry, love.”

Sorry isn’t enough, I thought, knowing he was too far away to read my mind. I took a deep breath and released a long sigh. The kind that I drew out on purpose to count to ten and keep myself calm. James had known me since we were children. He’d recognize it. “I know you are.”

“Look, the reservation is for two people. Why don’t you call your sister and just take her to a nice dinner?”

“Yeah, yeah maybe,” I said with no real enthusiasm behind the words.

“Baby… I tried so hard to get everything done on time. It should have been finished yesterday if we hadn’t hit the snag as hard as we did. We just need time to fix it. If I had my way, I’d come home to you tonight and then fly back out. I don’t care that that’d put me on a plane for a solid twelve hours. It would be worth it to see you. But the Department won’t let me leave until it’s done.”

“I know you don’t have a choice.”

“I don’t—and I’m so sorry.”

“It’s okay, James,” I muttered.

I hung up without another word. I blinked, letting the tears welling up spill over and fall down my face. Lowering my phone, I went to the restaurant’s website and canceled the reservation. No point in calling my sister. It wouldn’t feel right.

I tossed my phone onto the bed and yanked the boat shoes off, shoving them unceremoniously back into the shoe hanger. My nice dinner outfit quickly followed, getting put back in the closet until I was standing in just my underthings. I threw back the covers of the bed and climbed in. Appetite gone. It would come back voraciously later, but for now the pit in my stomach hurt more than ached for food.

Curled up on my side, I let myself cry.

I’d been looking forward to dinner for our anniversary, sure. But more than that I’d been looking forward to seeing James again. His job took him away for weeks—sometimes months—at a time. I missed him. Constantly. I didn’t care how much the Department paid him when it meant I never got to see him. It was weird, growing up practically glued at the hip only to never see him as an adult. When we also shared a bed.

I don’t know how long I cried. I allowed myself to release the pent-up sadness, reaching for James’ side of the bed as though I could touch him. But, of course, nothing but the bedsheet met my hand.

I buried my face in his pillow. He’d been gone so long that there wasn’t a trace of his scent lingering on it anymore. That pine scent with a hint of musk that accompanied his aftershave. Nothing. Just the generic smell of laundry detergent. But I kept my head on the pillow anyway. It felt like when we were cuddling so close that he’d pull me off my own pillow and onto his.

Sobs shook my whole body until I had no tears left to cry. I had a headache from all the crying and my whole mouth felt thick with emotion.

It had been years since I cried myself to sleep, but I was too exhausted to get up when I ran out of tears. So my body crashed into unconsciousness with my mind following swiftly after.

I woke up the next morning with a growling stomach. Joints stiff from not moving. Some anniversary, I thought as I got up to go shower and get some breakfast.

—

Two Weeks Later…

—

“Love? I’m home,” James said tentatively as he slipped into the apartment.

Silence.

“Baby?” He set his suitcase next to the door and slid out of his shoes. Their apartment wasn’t large—a two-bedroom so he and his partner could share an office—but it wasn’t usually this dead silent.

No response.

James didn’t read his partner’s mind without permission. Not even to check if they were home.

Especially when he knew they were probably pissed at him.

He rushed to their bedroom and peered in. The bed was neatly made, and folded laundry sat on the covers. Theirs. He recognized the shirts and the color they chose for their towel set.

He leaned across the hall to the office. The door was shut, but it faced west so they usually kept it shut to keep out the light of the setting sun at bedtime.

He tested the knob. Not locked. He pushed the door open.

Empty.

The bathroom door was wide open and also empty, apart from toothbrushes in a mug and hair combs on the counter.

There was nowhere else in the apartment they could be.

James sighed and went back to where the kitchen and living room opened up into each other.

A little square of green on the off-white counter caught his eye.

He crossed over and saw the pad of sticky notes with a pen sitting beside it, recognizing his partner’s handwriting. @ my sister’s. Should be back by 7.

There was no signature. No heart doodled in the margins like they normally might have done.

Yeah. They were angry.

James couldn’t blame them. He’d missed their anniversary. They’d been together for years and he’d always managed to make it home for their anniversary.

He sighed and pushed a hand through his hair. The clock on the stove said it was 4:49. A little over two hours before they’d be home. How was he going to be patient for two hours? It wasn’t like he didn’t know where their sister lived. God knew he’d been over to her house for unempowered holidays plenty enough. But the be back by 7 was an obvious implication of don’t come over. I’ll see you when I'm good and ready.

He missed them. All he wanted was to hold them in his arms and kiss them silly. Carry them to bed and snuggle them close to him and… maybe other things, if they were up for it.

But he’d be damned if he disrespected their choice to stay away from him until they were ready.

He closed his eyes—they were tired, dry, and stung when closed—and leaned against the counter with the heels of his palms. They both knew it wasn’t his fault that he missed their anniversary. The Department had sprung the extension of the contract on him with barely any notice. But that didn’t mean his partner wasn’t hurt by it. They had every right to be. After getting their hopes up and having those hopes crash and burn mere minutes before they were probably planning on leaving the house, he’d be more surprised if they weren’t hurt.

Peeling his eyes open, he glanced at where his car keys were sitting in a woven wicker bowl on the trestle table next to the door.

An idea struck him.

Belated anniversary celebration, here I come, he thought, marching over to his keys.

—

“You’re welcome to stay here overnight, you know,” my sister said as she hugged me.

“I know. But I really should be getting home,” I replied. A bit more sullen than I meant to sound. “Thanks for hanging out with me today.”

“Of course. I’m sorry you and James are having a rough patch.”

“We’ll get through it. I hope. We always have before.”

She squeezed me tighter. “It’s gonna be okay. If you need anything, let me know.”

I nodded as I broke the hug and pulled my keys out of my pocket. “I will. Thank you. Love you.”

“Love you too.” She waved me off as I left her house and went to my car.

I waved and ducked into it, turning over the engine and putting on my seatbelt.

Blasting the radio did very little to drive out my thoughts. James would be home by the time I got back. He had to be. His flight landed at like 4:15 or something. Even the slowest Uber caught in traffic wouldn’t take that long to get from the Dahlia airport to our apartment. If he’d been flying into Orange County airport, LAX, or San Diego airport, maybe. But not Dahlia airport.

What was I going to say? I was still smarting from the pain of him missing dinner and telling me right beforehand. I knew it wasn’t his fault and he hadn’t had a choice. But it still stung. I’d missed him for two weeks longer than necessary and didn’t even know how I could say that through the anger.

I wanted to be nice because I missed him. But I also wanted to yell at him for even taking the damn job that was cutting it so close to our anniversary.

My thoughts spun in unhelpful spirals the whole drive home. Before I knew it, it was five minutes to seven and I was getting out of the car at our building. James’ car was in its usual stall next to where I parked.

I went up to our apartment and paused on the doorstep, staring down at our welcome mat past my keys in my hand. Did I knock or just go in?

I clenched my jaw. I wasn’t the one who’d done anything wrong. And he was probably hurting too but I wasn’t the one who missed our anniversary.

Shoving my key in the lock with more force than strictly necessary, I rammed the deadbolt back and pushed the door open.

“Oh—my God,” I said.

The living room was mostly dark, lit by a pair of tall taper candles in the brass candlesticks James’ mother had pawned off on us when she and James’ father had been purging their decorations. A bouquet of deep red roses sat in a vase between the tapers.

An elaborate dinner was spread out, plates already dished up, set for two. With the tablecloth we only ever really used for the MoonBound solstice draped beneath. Despite the elaborate dinner, the dishes used to prepare it were cleaned and put away, nothing even sitting in the drying rack next to the sink.

The TV was playing one of those several-hour YouTube videos of a fireplace, and the console table the TV sat on had a banner stretched across it that said, Happy Anniversary! In big block letters.

James was standing next to the dining table. In his best black suit, wearing a dark teal tie. He had his hands clasped in front of him and he looked worried.

We just stared at each other for several long seconds while I nudged the door shut until it finally clicked into the doorframe.

I blinked. “I’m underdressed,” I said.

The smile he gave me was melancholy. “You look beautiful. Just as you are,” he said. I dropped my keys in the bowl next to the door but didn’t say anything. He took a step forward, but didn’t get too close to me. “I missed you, love.” His voice dropped to a whisper. “So much.”

My anger broke—and so did my control over the tears I’d been holding back.

I burst into tears and rushed at him, throwing my arms around him while he cradled me close to his chest. I got lost in how many kisses we exchanged. They were wet and salty with how bad I was crying, but neither of us seemed to mind. “I missed you so much, Jimmy,” I whispered.

He blinked tears out of his own eyes, but he was smiling. “You haven’t called me that in a long time,” he said softly, cupping the side of my face in his hand.

“You don’t like it when I use it too often,” I said. I leaned up toward his head and pressed our foreheads together. “Come in, please?”

“You sure?”

“I’m sure.”

—missed you— —look beautiful— —love you— —thank you—

His voice drifted through my mind with comfortable familiarity. I snuggled against him. “I love you too,” I whispered.

He kissed my forehead. “Sit down. Let’s eat.”

We sat and had dinner, and I felt the twist of pain on my heart lighten and ease. I felt like I could finally breathe after two weeks of suffocating.

Toward the end, the conversation had petered out a bit and I found my thoughts spiraling again. “James?” I asked quietly.

“Yes?”

“Never miss our anniversary again.”

He leaned across the table and took my hand. “I’ll do my best, love. I promise.”

—don’t want to hurt you— —so sorry— —not enough, but it’s all I can say now—

#Redacted ASMR #fic #Redacted James #James #Redacted Audio #Starlit Fic

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motherfuckingmagicbrian · 1 month

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I’m late to Johann appreciation week. I’ve not kept up with general Johann fanon. I am going to make up some egregious head canons. Enjoy.

The Twins Part 1 - The Phoenix Fire Guantlet

Johann stood infront of the charred figure of a woman. He placed his hand against hers as if touching a mirror, but touching ash and char instead. He knew what did this.

This was his fault.

Why did he make it?

The others had put so much thought into their relics. This was simply his fourth pass at a shoddy idea. (He could hear her voice in the back of his head “You are too hard on your creations.”) He tried to go against his natural instinct. He wanted to make something serious. Protective. He had always needed to be protected. He was always the lackadaisical one. So he made a flame gauntlet. It was a ridiculous thing and the only good it’s done was burn his original drafts.

He crumpled to the ground and looked down to the perfect obsidian beneath him. Instead of his own face looking back at him, the only thing he saw was his sister he left behind. The one who encouraged him to apply with his theory of audio resonance on a planar level. The one who always listened to his music and saved his notations from the trash. More than half his soul, his heart. His twin.

He needed to find it and soon. He couldn’t let this be his legacy in this world. He would be back soon enough. At least that’s what he said in his note, the one he left on the music stand.

#fraternal twin be upon him #sometimes you just need to make really self indulgent angst ok #taz #the adventure zone #taz balance #Johann #johann appreciation week

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classicschronicles · 1 year

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Hi lovelies,

Last week I convinced my Dad to read the Iliad (well audio-book it but same thing). Every morning I get in the car for school and he launches the entire Spanish Inquisition on to me about whatever book he listened to the night before. He then just sits there in silence and questions why I took Classics. But after explaining the Iliad to my Dad every day, I’ve realised that it can be seriously confusing if you just pick it up with no context. So today I’m going to try and give the Cliff Notes version of the Iliad aetiology!

The ‘Iliad’ translates to the ‘Story of Ilium’ (Ilium being the contemporary name for Troy). The Iliad is a Greek epic written by the poet Homer, and the reason it is called an ‘epic’ is because it has certain defining features. An epic is a very large story that can be broken down into smaller books (in this case 24 books). It usually depicts or focuses on a journey or a large theme or event (so the journey of Achilles, the theme of war, or the event of the Trojan War). In traditional ancient epics the main character is a hero. *enter Achilles, stage left*

Achilles is the son of the Goddess sea nymph Thetis and the mortal king, Peleus. Initially Thetis was one of Zeus’ many loves but a prophecy that stated that the son of Thetis would be more powerful than his father led Zeus to marry Thetis off to Peleus (to ensure that this unborn son did not pose a threat to the king of the Gods).

As an apology to Thetis for making her marry a mortal man, Zeus throws Thetis and Peleus a huge, massive, over the top (basically Indian) wedding. Out of all the Gods and Goddesses only Eris, the Goddess of strife, is not invited. Which is understandable, because why would you want Strife at a wedding? Eris gatecrashes the wedding and holds up a golden apple and says that the apple belongs to the fairest of the goddesses. Aphrodite, Athena, and Hera all claim that the apple should be theirs. Zeus is too much of a pussy to chose which goddess the apple should go to and so he sends them to the Trojan Prince, Paris for judgment. This whole side myth, by the way, is called ‘The Judgement of Paris’

Okay so Paris, that’s a whole other story. Paris is the son of the Trojan King and Queen, Priam and Hecuba. Before his birth, Hecuba received a prophecy about her son too. Her prophecy stated that the child she would have would be a burning torch that set fire to Troy. After giving birth to the baby Paris, she left him on Mount Ida to die. However, he was adopted by a shepherd and brought up as his son. At some point he returns to Troy and reminds his mum that she left him on a mountain (although I don’t know how he knew that) and despite the prophecy Priam and Hecuba took him back in.

Back to the main plot. The three goddesses (Aphrodite, Athena, and Hera) go to Paris and ask him who is the fairest, each promising a gift if he chooses them. Athena says that she will bring him success in war, Hera says she will bring him political power, and Aphrodite promises him the most beautiful woman as his wife. For those amongst you already familiar with the story, I of course am referring to Helen of Sparta. Paris travels to Sparta on a diplomatic mission where the beautiful Helen is married to the most powerful of all the Greek kings- Menelaus. After the mission is complete, Menelaus leaves Sparta for some foreign business, leaving Helen to entertain the Trojans. It is at this point that Paris kidnaps Helen and takes her to Troy.

Now Helen is of course famed for being the most beautiful woman alive, but she was also a daughter of Zeus. When the time came for her to marry she had many suitors (such as Patroclus), but Menelaus was chosen. Odysseus suggested that all the unsuccessful suitors take a blood oath that if there ever came a time that Helen was in danger, they would all bring their men to protect her. That is why the armies of so many Greek kingdoms arrive in Troy (to fight alongside Menelaus and to save Helen). Fun fact! Achilles was never proposed as a suitor for Helen and so he wasn’t contractually obliged to be in Troy, he just went for the glory (and probably for Patroclus too). Oh and also because Odysseus told him that if he didn’t go he would look like a wimp.

The Iliad begins exactly one decade into the Trojan War (I’m not joking they have literally been there for ten whole years- I can’t make this shit up). When the poem takes off both sides are weary from war, but the Greek have just won a small battle victory- abducting two women- Chryseis and Briseis. And it is after the abduction of these two women that Book One takes place.

I’m not kidding, explaining this to my dad has been an entire Olympic Sport. I think me asking him to read it has just opened up the door to him questioning every single one of my life choices! But hopefully you all found that a lot more digestible. Hope you all have a lovely rest of your weekend :)

#classical studies #classics #greek mythology #ancient rome #ancient greece #dark acamedia #roman mythology #hellenic deities #ancient world #history #homer’s iliad #the iliad #my dad was like #wtf is this #wtf is happening #my child is fine #patrochilles #paris #the aeneid

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that-glitter-chick · 10 months

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My entry for day one of SkyStar Week 2023! I like to write little ficlits and assign songs to my art as a bonus.

Prompt: Curious, Song: I want to hold your hand by The Beatles.

Ficlit: Collision Course

“What’cha working on Star?”

“Gah! Nothing.” Starscream jumped, startled by the normally welcomed voice’s sudden appearance so close to his audio receptor. He just as quickly flung himself over his datapad, covering it with his arms to obstruct his Amida Endura’s view of its contents. If the handsome giant knew the device had a sketchy portrait of himself, drawn so meticulously and lovingly by his little companion, Starscream would fling himself into the next black hole he came upon.

Chuckling good naturally, Jetfire stepped back with his servos up in surrender. “Ok, I get it. Classified subject.” He smiled warmly down at his much shorter lab partner. “I just came over to ask if you would like to join me. I’m going to Maccadam’s to wind down a little before heading home.”

Starscream smirked mischievously “Only if you’re buying big guy. Let me clean up here and I’ll be right with you.”

“Meet you in the foyer?” Skyfire suggested and Starscream nodded. As he turned to leave the large shuttle-former stopped to look over his shoulder “Would you like me to invite your brothers as well?”

“No!” The small seeker caught himself short at his own outburst but his friend was used to such dramatic behavior. More calmly, Starscream explained “They’re busy tonight. Uh, I understand if you’d rather not just hang out with me.” He seemed to deflate into himself at the thought. “I know Thundercracker is more charming and Skywarp more fun than I am…”

Returning to his friend’s side, Skyfire knelt and hugged him. Pulling back to look his partner in the optics, blue meeting crimson, Skyfire murmured gently, “Actually I was offering for your sake. You seem more at ease when with your Trin. But to be perfectly honest,” Skyfire was blushing to beat the proverbial band “I much prefer having your company all to myself.”

“I’m all yours.” Starscream choked a little on a sudden gasp at his own impulsive admittance. But before he could stutter a save for himself, Skyfire grinned brightly, stood back up and said,

“Great! It’s a date then. I’ll go lock up my lab and wait for you to get done here.” Just as he reached the door, the same time Starscream was having a processor meltdown over the term ‘date’ having been used so nonchalantly, he turned and smiled impishly. “Oh and Star…”

“Yeah…?” The Seeker asked cautiously.

“You’re a talented artist. I’ve never looked better.” He winked a sky blue optic and quickly retreated from the room as Starscream’s temper erupted.

“You peeked! You total cheat! It’s not done yet. You’re buying me two rounds for that! Sheesh.”

#skystarweek 2023 #g1 transformers #g1 starscream #g1 skyfire #skystar #prewar cybertron #maccadam

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dashboardjuliet · 1 year

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flesh and bone | chp 3: August 15

previous chapter: here

Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader oc

After a messy divorce, you move into a rural house determined to continue on with your life. Until you discover your new home is less empty than you believed it to be

Warnings: legal recreational drug use, no under 18 readers

Notes: Who else has heard the badjhur audios? I’ve just discovered and w h e w.

The book you're reading is interesting enough. Some murder mystery with the perfect amount of sex that keeps you marginally more in the story than you normally would be. You had picked it up at your local bookstore with the full intention of actually enjoying the story. But really it’s just serving as a distraction as you wait for your edible to kick in, to feel the heaviness of it flood into your eyes, till the world is a little easier to digest. Till you can forget the lurking shadow of Ghost standing at the sliding door. Head propped up on the armrest of your couch, legs thrown every which way, one resting over the back of the sofa, you can see him clearly. And you know he can see you.

It’s almost been a week that you’ve been together in the strange living arrangement that you’ve found yourself in. And it hasn’t been horrible. He lives up to his name, that’s for sure. He barely makes a noise, haunting that spot at the door. You’ve barely seen him move, save for a quick stretch here or there that makes him seem almost human, like his body aches from standing in the one spot for too long. You’ve not heard him speak once, to himself and especially not to you. He’s just stood there, watching as you moved from place to place, as your father came to deliver your ordered furniture. You had been scared, in the moment, that your father would notice the hulking shadow in the corner but if he did, he had said nothing. You hadn’t bothered to ask Ghost about it, figuring the answer would lead to more questions.

In fact, you’ve really not talked much at all with your roommate. He’s been like a giant spider, in your mind, something you can live peacefully with if only you completely avoid thinking about it. For a brief moment you feel a creeping sense of guilt. The man has probably been alone for so long, and all you’ve done is awkwardly ignore him in hopes that maybe he’ll go away.

But! That just can’t be helped in the moment. You’re reading, that’s your current task. Or at least it was supposed to be. But fifteen minutes later and the only progress that you’ve made in your book is reading the same line five times.

And then you’re suddenly overly conscious of the fact that you have teeth.

Book forgotten, you run your tongue over them to make sure that you actually can’t feel any sensation from them. What a strange thing, teeth, you think. You blink, lazily, and then smile. Your edible was finally kicking in, and despite the fact that you’ve gotten high time and time again, it still surprises you that your brain immediately lands on ‘teeth’ as your way of knowing you’re high. If you were alone, you would bring a hand up to touch one of your canines, suddenly occupied with the thought that you’re physically capable of touching part of your own skull while alive.

It’s not a far leap to make then, when your thoughts and gaze drift back to him. Placing your book down on the floor, you remove your legs from the back of the couch and curl upward, hooking your arms over the back and resting your head on them, watching him. He’s staring outside, thank God, so you’re able to observe him in a neutral state. You’ve not spent much time observing him, so to have a moment in clear daylight where you can watch, it feels nice.

The cape of his gear hides most of him from the back, but he’s standing at an angle, like his shoulder could be resting on the wall, and it gives you the briefest of side views of him. He’s thick, you realize with a slow glance. And it’s not that you can tell clearly. Like most things about him, his true form is concealed by all the gear he has on him but you bet that if you were able to get your hands on his biceps, your hands wouldn’t even be close to touching if you wrapped them around him. Oh god do you want to find out, the urge so bad that you almost start to slide off the couch. Till you remember that you can’t touch him. Not that he would want you to touch him. You would never touch him without his permission, even if you could, even though you so desperately need an answer to your question.

So you settle on something more neutral to satiate your growing curiosity for your Ghost, an easier way to get answers from him. Channeling your students, you land on a one sided game of twenty questions.

“Where’re you from?” Your voice breaks through the afternoon silence. Instead of answering, he moves, turns to look at you although you still can’t see his eyes. At the distance you are now, he looks like he has none. But the memory of those blond lashes is there in your head, calming down the immediate flight response your body produces at seeing the skull mask stare at you. “I’m from here. Michigan, I mean. But not like, this exact place. I was born in Detroit.”

“This is Michigan?” He seems almost surprised by that fact.

“Yeah. Did you not know that? Have you ever known?” Somehow the idea of him not knowing where he’s haunting makes you sad.

“Maybe I did. Guess I’d forgotten.” He goes distant suddenly, his voice far off. That wasn’t your goal. You didn’t want him lost, you wanted him here, with you, sharing. Maybe your secret game had been a bad idea. But you’re already in it now, too far gone to give up on your curiosity.

“Well, now you know again. And it’s your turn to answer my question.” You make your eyes as big as you possibly can without making it weird. Your ex spouse had always said your eyes could change even the firmest of convictions. Or maybe they have just been in love with you then. Either way, you try. It settles into a staring match that ends with him looking away with a huff.

“M’from Manchester, originally. Been all over though, never really settled.” You tamper down the urge to throw your hands in the air in victory, instead opting for a large grin. He won’t notice, he’s back to staring outside, so the grin feels safe.

“What brought you to Central Michigan? It’s not like this is exactly a remote location to vacation at.” Your head feels heavy as you speak, and you tilt it to the side to rest on your crossed arms, alleviating the floating feeling in your brain.

“Can’t answer that.” His voice is resolute, cutting, firm in a way that you haven’t heard him be before. It makes you perk up a bit, your endless curiosity aided by being high and interested in him alone. You scoot closer to the back of the couch, if that’s even possible, tucking your body into the cushions. As if you’re trying to get closer to him without encroaching into the invisible barrier that you both have put between each other. The corner of the kitchen slash eating space is his, but oh god do you want to crowd into it and ask him everything.

“Can’t, or won’t?”

“Both. Next question.” His words descend like a guillotine, cutting your train of questioning off before it even had a chance to root. You pause, watching the invisible lines of him spread outwards. He’s been a puzzle, but it’s become clearer. Kind of. You had guessed the military from his outfit, the gear pointing toward that outcome or a survivalist dead set on the end of the world. But now you’re sure you were right, his secrecy making it clear that it’s knowledge that you aren’t supposed to know.

“How did you know I was going to ask another question?”

“Y’think I’m dumb? I know what you’re doing.” And suddenly piece number two about him falls into line: He’s always watching, in more ways than one. It makes your skin crawl for just a moment, the way that he can know with just a glance what your plan was. What else does he see and notice about you? It’s hard to know for certain, but you think there’s a seed in your gut that wants to know more, rising up in you, begging for release. You swallow it back down.

He’s turned toward you now, skull facing you head on. He’s still leaning, slightly, seeming to rest against the wall. Nonchalant and intimidating, a black figure stood stark against the white of your walls. You tilt your head as you watch him back. How does he not phase through the walls like your hands do with him? Can he control it? Or is it something about the house? Instead of any of these questions, you blurt out—

“How old are you?”

“What year is it?”

“Twenty twenty two.”

“Mm. Thirty eight then.” You pause and he must catch the way your eyes widen, uncontrollable. You really didn’t mean to look surprised, but you weren’t expecting a ten year age gap between the two of you. Suddenly you feel young despite everything you’ve done and accomplished. You feel small. “What? Weren’t expecting an old geezer?”

“No!” You shout, body surging forward slightly till you remember yourself and curl backward, slinking back into yourself, suddenly overly conscious of your limbs and self. You spend a moment rearranging yourself, tucking your legs under you and arms returning to the back of the sofa. “No, I just didn’t think you were that much older than me. You seem… younger?” You wince at the words. Younger isn’t the right choice, but you can’t nail down why you were so surprised.

Your gaze returns back to him to find him staring at you again. If you looked hard enough, you could picture him with an eyebrow crooked upward. Would his hair be thick like the rest of him? Or is it the exact opposite? For a moment your mind wanders, trying to fill in the blanks that the skull mask keeps hidden. What he looks like is a mystery. Your fingers itch to find out.

“Flattered you think that.” His voice is deadpan. He goes quiet for a moment and then tilts his head, curious. “How much older?”

“Ten. It’s really not that much, I don’t know why I was so surprised. Bigger age gaps exist, obviously. Like Leonardo diCaprio and literally every woman he’s ever dated. Did you see his new girlfriend is like twenty? Can’t he date someone his age? Or at least like someone who’s not twenty years younger?” You pause, waiting for a response, but he says nothing. Suddenly you realize you were babbling, filling the silence with pointless noise. Also how the hell would he know that? Or care? All the man does is stare out at the corn. You wince. “Sorry. I get… chatty when I’m high.”

There’s silence for a moment, the humming of cicadas and the wind moving through the corn, and then… a laugh. He’s huffed in amusement but this, this is a laugh. A bark of a noise that splits the silence like the sea. Your chest constricts at the noise and a feeling that feels a bit like pride floods your body. It’s not a want, but a need. You need to hear that noise from him again. It might just be the weed making your body weak, but you need to know what other noises he has hidden in him. What other things can come from his mouth that would make you feel like this?

“Oh really? I couldn’t tell. This is th’most we’ve talked. Been avoidin’ me.” Laughter remains in his voice, making him seem lighter. Actually younger, now that you know the truth. You blush, burning, flooding your cheeks. You shouldn’t be surprised that he noticed the way you’ve edged around him, but that doesn’t stop you from being stricken with embarrassment. You tuck into yourself, wanting to hide from him, or whatever you’re feeling. Probably both.

“Not avoiding. I just… I’m not quite sure what to do with you.” You admit, peeking over the edge of the sofa at him. If you could see, you’d imagine his gaze would be soft. But that could also just be your imagination.

“What d’you mean?”

“Ah. It’s just been a long time since I’ve lived with someone who wasn’t family. And the time before that didn’t… end well. I just don’t know how I’m supposed to be. Around you. Like do you want to be ignored or engaged with? All you do is stare at corn and I don’t know what to do with that.”

“Well…” You’ve earned another huff from him, and his hand comes up to rub at his chin. It’s a funny scene that makes you giggle, this giant of a man seemingly scratching the mandible of his skull mask. “How about this: we just agree to be friends, so you can stop not knowing what to do, hm? Does that make this easier for you?”

“Friends?” You blink.

“Friends. You do know what the word means, yeah?”

“Yes I know what friends means.” You glare at him, and then relax. Friends. You could do friends. You nod your head slowly.

“Okay Ghost. Let’s be friends.”

TAGLIST @irnbru32 @maxi-ride

#my writing #ghost is a ghost au #simon ghost riley #cod simon riley #simon Riley x reader #simon riley x oc #ghost x reader #ghost x oc #cod #call of duty mw2

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libraryinthecountry · 1 year

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★ Happy #ShelfieSunday, readers! What are your last, current, and next reads? My last was @joannashupe’s The Lady Gets Lucky—a historical romance in which an inexperienced lady turns to a scoundrel for “seduction lessons.” It’s the second book in the Fifth Avenue Rebels series and was a solid 4.5 stars! I just started the audio this morning of Net Worth by @awilderomance, the first book in the Wealth trilogy, featuring a woman who makes a bargain to save her family’s name—with a man seeking revenge. I’m excited, because I’ve had the trilogy on my TBR since it released, and I love Amelia Wilde’s books! I’m also continuing to read Shattered Souls by @beck_michaels! I’m at about 72 percent in the ebook right now and hoping to finish this week (the start of the semester set me back a bit!). It’s a beefy, epic read, and if you haven’t started this series yet, I cannot recommend it enough. Fated mates, forbidden romance, found family, a grand journey and heroic quest, morally grey character and villains you kinda sorta wish were heroes. 🙊 One of my next up is Bewitched by @laurathalassa! I adore Laura and her books and she is someone I’ll always drop everything for—including A BRAND NEW SERIES 😭 Bewitched is a brand new paranormal romance, with witches, and an ancient evil that has been awakened, a case of mistaken identity, mysterious deaths, and of course, who holds answers? May I refer you back to “ancient evil that has been awakened” 😱 Laura says this one is dark and spicy, and I’m ready 🙏🏼 Also yeah, you know I’ll be listening to Chain of Thorns the moment I can this week. 😭😅🤧 Hope you all have a great week! February is almost here! ★ HASHTAGS // #totalbooknerd #bookshelfie #bookstagram #readerlife #homelibrary #bookshelves#stacksaturday #readingnook #currentlyreading #fantasybooks #romancebooks #ameliawilde #joannashupe #laurathalassa #beckmichaels https://www.instagram.com/p/CoAu_5dS0Gf/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

#shelfiesunday #totalbooknerd #bookshelfie #bookstagram #readerlife #homelibrary #bookshelves #stacksaturday #readingnook #currentlyreading #fantasybooks #romancebooks #ameliawilde #joannashupe #laurathalassa #beckmichaels

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tellthemeerkatsitsfine · 6 months

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I’ve had Cabin Pressure saved on my phone for fucking ages by now. I downloaded it back in early July, I think. I had the idea that I had gone through most of my list of things to watch/listen to, and I wanted some new long-running audio thing. I asked people what they thought I should pick, and had multiple recommendations for this show Cabin Pressure, which is not long-running, people just said it’s good and only 13 hours so I should do that first. I didn’t know much about it, I knew that John Finnemore is one of those guys who was Footlights and Radio 4 so probably does the kind of vaguely pretentious humour that I like, so I downloaded it and figured that once I finish everything else on the list, I’ll quickly do the 13 hours of Cabin Pressure before starting some new long-running thing.

…That was months ago. It’s now mid-November, because I kept getting recommended other things. I did a Lee & Herring rabbit hole, followed by going through a whole bunch of Stewart Lee things that I didn’t get to last year when I just did his TV shows + DVDs. A similar thing with Josie Long, when I got my ahdns on a bunch of her stuff that went beyond her recorded shows that I heard/watched last year. There was a bunch of Robin Ince stuff and Michael Legge stuff. There were lots of recordings from the 2023 Edinburgh Festival throughout August. Then there was Alan Partridge, I listened to From the Oasthouse and liked it so much that I had to listen to all three of his audiobooks before I could move on from that. Turns out I missed out on a lot by only doing the TV/radio things + movie on the first go of that stuff years ago, the books and podcasts are better.

There have been other things too. I kept finding more stuff, to add to my “Comedy --> New” working folder on my phone, with the folder labeled “Cabin Pressure” always there at the top, never touched. But this week, I finally finished everything else in that folder, and all the episodes on my podcast app and in my Downloads folder on my laptop, and opened up this new thing.

I realized I’d been expected it to be a show about people trapped in an airplane after a crash or something – some sort of horror scenario like that. So I was surprised to learn it’s just a sitcom about airline pilots flying planes, and I had to retrace my steps to work out where I got my expectation. I think it came from the fact that the only thing I’ve seen John Finnemore do was be the guy who flew the escape pod in Avenue 5, so I guess I just assumed anything he does with flying is a dystopia.

I’m now two episodes in, and it’s not a dystopian nightmare. It’s Butternut Cabbagepatch and Peter Manion from The Thick of It being sarcastic at each other, and it’s great. It makes me almost nostalgic, the way it so perfectly captures the essence of the Radio 4 sitcom, of the sort that my dad used to often play in the car when I was a kid. Biting, sarcastic characters all talking with perfect diction and dry wit being sardonically annoyed about things. A bit like The Department too (which is another example of how I think this the exact type of slightly pretentious humour that you get when you combine Footlights with Radio 4). I love that shit.

Unfortunately, however, I’ve been sidetracked again. I’ve heard a few things of Nish Kumar’s recent stand-up, some of which can be seen in a post that’s been going around Tumblr, where he thanks Russell Brand for never making anything of value that is now ruined by the recent news. I think the version that got filmed actually didn’t mention Arthur, but in some other versions, he has said he specifically appreciates that the Arthur remake was shit so it’s not like anyone’s out there saying “Oh no, I can’t watch the Arthur remake anymore.” I hope the fact that he didn’t mention it on NextUp doesn’t mean he’s cut that line entirely, because I think it’s a good example.

I haven’t seen the Arthur remake. But I have seen Arthur, several times, when I was quite young. To be honest I don’t remember a lot about it, except that it had a main character who was kind of a dick, with a dry-witted sarcastic butler who at one point said “I’ll alert the media” when Arthur said he was going to take a bath. I remember that part because it became a running joke in my family for years and years. It still is, actually. Ever since I was a kid, my family will say “I’ll alert the media” to each other as a way to sarcastically suggest that whatever they’re doing isn’t that important.

When I was a teenager, I used to write a parody newspaper that would publish an edition during every family reunion, because that’s the type of annoying teenager I was (I say, as though I don’t now have a blog for writing similarly annoying things). I remember that one time, at such a gathering, my father told me he was going to take a bath. “I’ll alert the media!” I said, very pleased to have had an excuse to use that reference in its original context. As soon as I said it, I realized I was the media, and considered myself alerted. So I wrote an article in the family newspaper called “Your Very Local News – What Is Going on in Your Bathroom Right Now” about how my father was taking a bath, and the whole thing was a joke about how the media has to be alerted when people take baths, and it was a reference to a movie that no one in the family besides my parents/brother and I had seen. I was about to write that that’s the sort of annoying teenager I used to be, but actually, I stand by that, I think it was hilarious.

Anyway. I haven’t actually seen that movie since I was young. I remember so little about it. I know it stars Dudley Moore. I remember my dad first got me interested in it by telling me it stars one of the Beyond the Fringe guys, since I loved the Beyond the Fringe CD that he used to play in the car a lot (when he wasn’t playing mildly pretentious Radio 4 sitcoms, or his Goon Show tapes – you can see how my childhood influenced my current interests). I remember finding it very funny.

So, when I heard Nish Kumar fairly recently mention the Arthur remake (for anyone who doesn’t know, the original movie is from 1981, while in 2011 Russell Brand starred in a remake, I have never seen that remake and have no desire to do so), it made me think I should re-watch that original movie. Then I listened to two episodes of Cabin Pressure, where one of the main characters is named Arthur, and every time they say his name it makes me think I should watch Arthur.

So the upshot is that I have downloaded the (original) Arthur movie and I’m going to watch that. But I will get back to Cabin Pressure soon! That show is definitely going in the folder of Britcom that I’ll give my dad for Christmas this year, as I’ve spent the last few years repaying him for raising me on this stuff by giving him back a stream of more comedy than he could ever watch or hear (don’t worry, I’ll get him a proper gift too). I am, to be honest, surprising myself a bit by how much I’m enjoying it.

In the meantime, though, I’ll let you all know if the Arthur movie is any good now that I’m over the age of about ten. Some things I enjoyed when I was ten have really held up, and some very much have not.

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